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#i also banged your kid up a bit more sorry June
thedemonscrawler · 1 year
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there’s two of you now, maybe you’ve got the security clearance to get the van ending?
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a silly thing involving my Gregory from Permission Slip and @sleepyjuniper ‘s Gregory from her fic Visions (or Lack Thereof)! If you ain’t read it yet, go do that!
no one ever, ever let me draw a vending machine in a comic again
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stilessderek · 1 year
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My Road To Becoming A Stay
According to my YT this date a year ago (7th of April 2022) marks the 1st anniversary of me first time watching anything Stray Kids. It all started with ODDINARY Main Trailer, however, it didn't make me a Stay just yet. Due to this day being a day that started my journey to finding Stray Kids and them changing my life, I decided to create a post showing my journey and lists of favorites. As you can probably see, I can’t decided on favorite songs as they have SO MANY GOOD ONES! First encounter: ODDINARY Main Trailer (thought it was BL (boys love) trailer with Felix and Hyunjin as main leads first. When I realized it was kpop I lost interested as I thought the music style wasn’t for me). Based on my YT log, I watched the trailer the 6th of April 2022. First song I heard: Maniac (kept showing up after I had seen ODDINARY trailer and eventually gave in and watched it). Song that made me a repeat listener: I watched Circus on the 12th of June 2022, along with Your Eyes that day but it wasn’t until 17th of June 2022 (according to my YT log) when I ended up listening to Neverending Story and Venom on the 28th of June 2022 (according to my YT log) that I became a Stay. First bias: Felix and Hyunjin. First ship: (I’m a shipper, I can’t help it) Hyunlix. Music videos that made me watch them over and over: (this is when I realized that I actually enjoyed listening to the music) Venom, Circus, Thunderous, God’s Menu, Back Door and Maniac. Before I knew it I was listening and watching (YouTube/TikTok) them all the time. Current bias: Felix, Hyunjin, Bang Chan, Lee Know, (that isn’t to say I don’t love Changbin, I.N, Han and Seungmin; each have something I like but those four above just makes my heart flutter a LITTLE bit more. Though I have to be honest that Han is taking up space in my mind more and more....).  Current ship: Hyunlix (the more I see of them, the more I love them; they’ve become my comfort (friend)ship), but I also really adore Chanlix. Stray Kids became my comfort place. I adore watching their chaotic videos and their music is amazing. It’s the first thing I do when I wake up. Stray Kids makes Stay stay. List of favorite songs: 1) Neverending Story (Tie) 1) Behind The Light (Tie) 2) Venom 3) Slump 4) Easy 5) Hellevator  5) Taste (Tie) 6) 24 to 25 (Tie) 6) Get Cool (Tie) 6) Lonely St. 7) Waiting For Us (Tie) 7) Red Lights (Tie) 7) The View (Tie) 8) Gone Days (Tie) 8) Circus (Tie) 8) Thunderous (Tie) 9) God's Menu 9) Back Door (Tie) 10) Maniac (Tie) 11) Charmer (Tie) 11) Domino (Tie) 11) Christmas EveL (Tie) 11) Wolfgang (Tie) 12) Scars (Tie) 12) Sorry, I Love You (Tie) 13) LoveStay  14) Secret Secret 15) Grow Up Honorable mentions: You Can Stay, Double Knot, Mixtape: Oh, My Universe, Placebo, Gone Away, Blueprint, Voices, I am YOU, Levanter, Victory Song, Here Always, HEYDAY, District 9, 3RACHA, Chill, Surfing, Ex, Wow, Airplane, Astronaut, SSick, Hello Stranger, B Me, There, Novel, Lost Me, DLMLU, Case 143 Favorite SKZ-REPLAY Songs: Deep End, Limbo, Love Untold, i hate to admit, Alien, Wish You Back, Up All Night, Drive, HaPpY, ice.cream, Piece of a Puzzle, Because, Zone, Streetlight (this is in order)
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halcyon-writings · 3 years
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i checked this list and it said persona so im hoping this is still ok. Date night with the protagonists? (Makoto, Yu and Ren) please and thank you >///
ー『anonymous: Can i get dating headcanons for the persona protags (Makoto, Yu and Ren) please and super thank yous. I love these boys so much. ;A;』
note(s): I am going to combine these requests as they are similar enough I hope that is alright! no real warnings for this one either, I just think these dudes are neat. Also I know they all have like 5 different names, so I just went with the ones I am more familiar with. Maybe(????) spoilers for 3, 4, and 5, so if you haven’t finished or played them, be warned (although, idk if anyone would read it if they haven’t played the respective game but idk warning for spoilers just in case) also idk how i feel about these hcs rn, but i did my best dhdjdj
all my other links can be found in my navigation post!! If you like my writing and you’d like to support me, my tip jar is also linked there!
hcs under the cut so i’m not clogging anyone’s dash (originally these were gonna be a short set of hcs but i guess not dbdndn)
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What our dear protagonist lacks in overall extrovertedness, he makes up for in action. Surprise surprise, dates can either range from hanging out in the dorms and cooking a nice meal together. Or maybe going to the mall and heading to the arcade. Or basically wandering around until your legs hurt and your purchases range from new outfits to weird antiques from the antique shop.
However he really does treasure these little trinkets, because the memory of your laughter when you were given a certain item will forever be ingrained in his mind. It’s a comfort in the end too.
Date nights are focused on you and you only. He definitely sets a date where he knows you both are free so that there’s less likely of a chance for being interrupted. He definitely wouldn’t want his time with you to be wasted. Although seeing his small pout when it does happen is very cute.
You also gotta be keen on if he sees something he likes and wants. While Minato won’t exactly say it, his gaze lingers a bit longer than usual. But he ultimately won’t get it, because he wants to focus on you and also save up for when the group goes to Tartarus. So if you surprise him with whatever he had wanted, he’s so happy.
While he is slightly more reserved in comparison to Yu and Akira, Minato speaks through action. Whenever you two are walking together, he always has your hand in his, or keeping close by in some way. He likes to cling to you when it’s just you two, his head buried in the crook of your neck as you two nap tother, legs tangled up together. Or the small jokes he says loud enough for only you to hear, but they’re still so funny. Sometimes you’re asked if he’s really a good boyfriend, and you have to laugh off the doubt, because they don’t see the sides of him that you do.
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My god. Yu would absolutely be the best at arranging dates and hangouts. I take no criticism. Like you guys could literally just be walking all around Inaba, or just sitting by the river bed and it could be one of the greatest times you’ve both had together. A romantic at heart, Yu would also be a bit cheesy in arranging dates.
He shows affection through communcating it. Whether it’s a new outfit or something, he’ll say that you look incredible or if you’ve studied for a hard exam, he’ll make sure you know how amazing you are for passing. Idk just anything that has you smiling from sweet compliments and other words of affirmation. A big sap, honestly you try and joke about it but he just earnestly says “Who wouldn’t be for you?” And you have to sit down and hide your face in your hands for a solid 5 minutes.
You also gotta be cool with Nanako. But then again she’s a cute kid and a sweetheart so idk why you wouldn’t be. Although he does get a little flustered if it’s you two watching her while Dojima-san is working late at the station and the old ladies coo over how you three look like a mini family yourselves. Which is kind of a common occurrence. And I feel like Yu would know pretty well if he sees a future with someone he’s with, and with you he does shhh
Date nights in Inaba are really fun and a good way to wind down, sometimes it’s wandering Junes and finding whatever the newly advertised, as seen on tv appliance is. Or other parts of the shopping district, where he can really let go and just have fun for himself. When not worrying about school work or the cases the Investigation Team is working on.
some spoilers here; but after Izanami is defeated and the year ends. When Yu has to leave Inaba it doesn’t mean that he won’t put his best efforts to keep up the relationship. If possible, video calls or just the occasional text too. And when he visits, while he does miss his friends, he’s especially antsy to see you too. And when you’re both together again, he refuses to leave your side.
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Now, Akira can be described as this suave, casanova type character. But he’s also a giant dork and you know it, he knows it, the Phantom Thieves all know it, hell even Sojiro knows it. It doesn’t mean his attempts at flirting doesn’t get you blushing. And when he sees the flustered expression, it only motivates him to keep going. But turn the tables on him, and he’s putty in your hands. (And he looks very cute).
Because of the way you met, aka, at Shujin, where his reputation was basically over and done with before it even began, he has a lot of doubt and trust issues, what if someone dared you to speak to the “criminal” or something? While he won’t show these doubts out loud to his friends, it’s still something he thinks back on a lot. But when you defend him vehemently one day, he knows he was right to trust you.
A part of dating Akira, is eventually finding out who he is. Maybe trips to Mementos cause him to be late to dates or not even show up at all. You end up stood up more often then not once things begin to get really serious. From small time school teachers to the literal Yakuza (and eventually a candidate for Prime Minister, and a god), you don’t know where he is. And that becomes really stressful because then the doubt™️ sets in.
To make this less angsty and more funny, imagine you know from figuring it out. He’s suspiciously watching the news on the PT, and no offense to Ryuji, he’s not the most quiet. So he’s so nervous trying to tell you when you’re just “yeah I know, sorry for not telling you, I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to know.” and he’s just the surprised pikachu face.
As for date nights, the city is your oyster. I’d say the world but mans still currently has a criminal record so probably not yet. But he’s gonna take you wherever you want. Whether it’s a themed cafe, or just the streets of Shinjuku, as you take in all the sights from the bright places, he’s willing to do whatever for you. That includes facing off kids at the arcade for a stuffed plush you saw and admitted it was cute. He is a man on a mission. And you cannot stop him. So you both end up back at Leblanc at the end of the night carrying your plushies and eating some curry that Sojiro left warming for you. That even includes the Big Bang Burger challenge he will do it for you , even though you probably do laugh at his pain after but you still coo and praise his efforts.
After he goes back home, record clean and world hopefully peaceful. Virtual dates become a thing, either just sitting and talking while having dinner or something is nice. He still loves to say those cheesy pickup lines that had you hiding your flustered expression as you walked through the streets of Shibuya on call. You only hung up on him once but he quickly called back and was very pouty about it. You were forgiven though with the promise of giving many kisses when he visits.
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josiecarioca · 3 years
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“Family...the real one.”
Summary: Emmet “Fin” Finnerty has found the love of his life in Doug Cleary. The next logical step is introducing him to his family...The real one.
Because “family” are those who take you in, when the ones who should love and protect you, fail.
Disclaimer: Fin and Doug are secondary characters of “Post War”, so while thechnically this story happens in the “Harry Potter” universe, it is not a fanfic as much as it is an original story, hence why it’s a tumblr publication alone. Evelyn is in this, but there will be no Snape, no magic and nothing of what my readers are used to see in my stories. I hope you still like it.
Warning: contains domestic violence, homophobia, homophobic slurs and emotions
Tagging, as usual:   @arabellafiggypudding @the-witches-son  @hummingbird-flying-in-the-rain @artisticreptilequeen @viper-official @be-zoar @violet-knox @mafagafobebum @marvelschriss @codename-thedoctor @zealouspickleeggdragon @green-oasis @drawnfromthedead @snapescapades @madshelily @serosvit  @snapecentric @hbprincealice @hayalee8 @lilythemadqueen @paracosim @oliverlandomens​ @sleepysnapesnake
“Family...the real one”
Dublin, Ireland
June 1998
“Full disclosure?” Fin was rambling. He knew he was. He usually did when he was nervous. Doug surely knew that by now. He even claimed he found it “adorable”. Only Doug could say something like that.
Three months. Three months and he was ready to make this official. He knew Doug felt the same. Unlike Fin, he had no problem showing his feeling, shouting them from the rooftops even. That didn't come so easy for Fin. It never did. But now, now he could do just that. Shout it from the rooftops. Make it official. And making it official started here. Introducing him to Lyn. It was a big step.
“Go ahead” Doug smiled, gazing at him with bright blue eyes full of endless patience.
Three months. Three months and Fin was starting to feel like this was it. He had found what he looked for in that handsome, sweet 6'ft tall dork of a man.
“You´re the first boyfriend I introduce to Evelyn since...God, I don't know...1995?”
“And why is that?” Doug asked, somewhat amused. After all, how much of a big deal could this possibly be? Sure, he was about to introduce his new boyfriend to his best friend, obviouly it was important, but how could he begin to explain it wasn´t just that simple?
“You know how it was...back then, I mean. I wasn't really being safe, and Lyn was just so worried about me and I never really thought she would approve of … Nevermind, now it's different. I want you to meet her. It's important.”
Fin looked around. He had picked a good place. The restaurant was nice enough that it felt like an occasion, but casual enough that it didn't seem like he was making a big fuss of it. But he was. It was a big deal. Fin wasn't the 'dating' type. But Doug was not like anybody he met before. Doug has this sort of tranquil aura about him, this kindness in his words and actions, such love in his eyes. Doug made him feel like he could just rest, breathe easy. This time he knew it was different. It just felt different. It felt like it could last.
Doug reached over the table to hold his hand, reassuringly.
“Her opinion means a lot to you, no?”
“Well, yes...this is my family we´re talking about. The real one, you know?”
Doug had been lucky. His parents loved him unconditionally, as parents should. He wasn´t kicked out of the house when he came out, he wasn´t told his entire being, his entire identity was an abomination before God. He wasn't made believe that no matter how good he was, how much of a good Christian he was, he would still go to hell for something he couldn't change. No, his parents loved him, protected him. Fin had also been lucky, but in a different, more complicated way. The family that loved and protected him wasn´t the one he was born into. It was Evelyn's.
“So, you told me you've known each other since you were kids...but, you never really said much more than that...”
That's right, Fin thought. He'd never told him. Not everything. He had to.
“I was friends with her brother growing up...Paul. We went to school together.”
There it was, that bittersweet ache in his heart. He hadn't felt it in a while
“I daresay I had a bit of a crush on him. Sometimes I wonder if he felt the same. But I guess I'll never know.”
“Why not?”
“Paul passed away. There was a fire in their house when he was just eleven. Lyn was there too. Their father pulled her out in time because she was closer to the door, but when he got to Paul it was too late. It happened too fast. ”
“I'm so sorry” Doug seemed stunned out of words. “I didn't know.”
“I didn't tell you. I should have. Specially today....we still have some time before she gets here, so....I think if we're serious about this, then you should meet Evelyn and her family...my family. That's why this is important to me. That you meet her and that you meet them.”
“Ok...So tell me. Tell me about your family, Fin.”
“I guess I should start from the beginning, then...Paul and I, we went to the same school. Catholic school...fun times.” he scoffed “Lyn was just a yar younger than us, and she went to an all girls school. Their father, Mr. Black was the headmaster, there. Paul took her everywhere with us when we weren't at school. Nothing could separate those two...Well, then...Paul passed away, and I was devastated, but her? I don't think there was a word in the entire dictionary that could have described how she was feeling, the poor girl. So I started going there to visit. They were all in such pain that I think Mr. Black let me spend as much time in their house as I wanted because he hoped it would help her. As it turns out it helped me. Being around her was a little like being with him. She looked so much like Paul it was eerie, nearly identical. I swear, if you could have seen them together, you'd swear they were twins. She was different though. Paul was like a hurricane in a boy's body. Lyn was much gentler. Anyway, the years went on and she just became...my sister, in a way. More than my own sister, to be honest. I'm pretty sure my parents expected us to date or something, but she knew, she was the first person I told. So she just came to my house, and smiled and nodded when my mother went on babbling about how we were perfect for each other and whatever nonsense. Then it happened...”
Doolin, Ireland
June, 1977
“What do you think?” Evelyn twirled, wrapped in meters of flowy, flowery fabric. The sun that came through the curtains filtered though the fabric, colouring the room.
“What am I looking at?” Emmet put down his magazine and watched her, trying to picture what she planned to do with the material she was showing him.
“My new dress, Fin!” she smiled, calling him by the nickname Paul had come up with years ago. Fin for 'Finnerty'. After Paul died, it was just the two of them. Fin and Lyn. “For my birthday. Since I'll be 15, mam said I can have it however I want.”
“Your birthday is in September!”
“It takes time to make a dress, and my grandma is going to have her hands full with Halloween costumes soon, so she's going to make my dress now. I want it long, with a bodice and medieval sleeves. Like Stevie Nicks in that magazine my dad brought from Dublin. He brought me the new Fleetwood Mac record too, here put it on.”
She set the fabric aside and fished the long play from the big canvas bag she had brought.
Whenever Lyn came over she always brought that huge bag, filled with clothes, magazines, records and books. She knew Fin couldn´t have any of that stuff at home. His mother didn't allow him to wear anything more colorful than a blue dress shirt for sunday mass, and his father was the one who decided which records, books or magazines were allowed in the house. Which meant no fashion or entertainment mags, no rock or pop music, and no books that seemed “suspicious”, which was pretty much anything that wasn't a school textbook. If not for Evelyn's father Emmet wouldn't even have read Oscar Wilde.
She handed him the record and he put it on, in the old record player Evelyn had snuck in for his last birthday. Her mother had got a new one, so she let Fin have the old 1967 Magnavox. His parents had no idea he had that thing in the bedroom, so he had to keep the volume low enough that his parents wouldn't hear it downstairs, or that they'd just think he had the radio on.
“We should ask my dad to take us next time he goes to Dublin. He promised me new shoes for my birthday. Red leather ones. With heels, I'm old enough for heels now. They only have those in Dublin.” Evelyn suggested, as both of them lay on the floor, staring at the reflection of the sun on the ceilling.
“You know my parents won't let me go.”
“They will if my dad is taking us. Or even better, if mam comes too. Your mother goes to church with her, of course she's going to let you go if she's with us. She's better to shop with anyway.”
“Maybe.” he trailed, knowing it wouldn't happen.
“We can buy some things for Halloween costumes. You should ask my grandma to make you one as well.Ooh, you know what? We can go as John Steed and Emma Peel! All you'll need is a suit, an umbrella and a hat, and grandma Liz can make me a jumpsuit. That purple one, with the chains! Or you want do do something spooky?”
“We´re not kids, anymore, Lyn.” he laughed
“And?”
“You really want to dress up for Halloween? We´re too old for that.”
“My grandparents still dress up for Halloween.” she scoffed
“It's different.”
“How?”
“They're...old-old. When you get to be their age you can do whatever you want.”
“They're not that old. I mean, if you...”
Evelyn's sentence was cut short by loud banging on the door. Emmet scrambled to his feet to turn off the music and toss a blanket over the record player. His father never banged on his door more than twice before yanking it open without waiting for an answer.
“You, downstairs now.” he barked at Emmet, before turning to Evelyn “And you can go back home, young lady. I need to talk to my son”
Emmet felt his stomach drop. His father never bothered to 'talk' to him, unless he was in trouble.
Evelyn picked up her things in a hurry and shoved it all back inside her bag, glancing over her shoulder at him all the while. She looked like she wanted to say something, but didn't know what.
“Now!” his father thundered from the stairs.
Emmet was frozen in place.
“Emmet is just helping me with my things, Mr. Finnerty. We'll be right there.” Evelyn answered, her voice slightly breaking.
“Come on...” she told him, holding his arm. “I'll go with you.”
“You have to go home.” he finally found his voice and his feet moved.
Emmet felt her hand grab his as they climbed down the stairs. His father was walking around the livingroom in circles, while his mother was talking to somebody. He heard her apologizing profusely. Then he realized why. She was talking to Connor Walsh's mother. As they reached the bottom of the stairs, Mrs Walsh shot him a disgusted look on her way out.
“Evelyn, dear, you can go now.” Mrs. Finnerty said, and Emmet noticed she had a piece of  paper in her shaky hands. He knew that piece of paper. He looked at Evelyn, feeling like the world was a minute away from crashing down onto his head. She  looked back at him, knowingly. He had told her about Connor...about the letter. She knew. He felt her hand squeeze his again.
“I won't.” she whispered.
Emmet didn't want her to go. But he also didn't want her to stay. He didn't want her to see what he knew was about to happen.
Neither of them had the time to say anything else. His father snatched the letter from his mother's hand and grabbed Emmet by the collar, nearly shoving the paper into his face.
“Did you write this?” he roared
Emmet couldn't find his voice. He felt warm tears swelling in his eyes. He could hear his mother's voice, asking his father to let him go and telling Evelyn to just go already.
“Did you write this drivel, lad?! Answer!” his father insisted, pushing the letter into his chest.
“Answer, Emmet!” his mother was crying “This is just a prank isn't it?”
It was over.
There was no point in lying, he had the letter right there. His mother might try to lie to herself, to convince him it was nothing, but it was there, plain for anyone to see it. They read it. They knew. He was sure they had already heard the rumors, the talk, the othe boys calling him this and that.
They knew it. They couldn´t pretend they didn't
“I did.” he  barely whispered.
Next thing he knew he felt his body hit the wall in full force. It didn't even hurt. It didn´t feel real.
Evelyn screamed and, from the corner of his eye, he saw her run to him. His father stepped in front of her.
“You get out of my house now, before I drag you home to your father, so he can teach you to mind your own business, lass.”
“Fin, I'll be right back!” she cried, running out the front door.
“What the devil were you thinking writing this?!” his father pulled him to his feet by his shirt.
“Stephen, let the lad go. This was just a game, just stupid prank. Tell him, Emmet, tell him this isn't serious.”
This was it.
They knew it.
They read it.
There was no turning back now.
“I did it, mam. I did it, I wrote it. It wasn't a prank, I really wrote it.”
“You hear it, Edith?! Your son can't even have the decency to be ashamed!”
“Why?! Why would you do something like this?!”
“You know why!” Emmet nearly screamed, overwhelmed, dizzy “You read it, didn't you? You know why! Iwrote it because I love him!”
His parents stared at him as if they were looking at something alien, something they couldn´t comprehend.
“Mam...dad...” he felt the tears run down his cheeks, burning. But he refused to cry, to sob. He wouldn't do that. “I'm gay.”
Emmet had expected his father to hit him.
What he didn't expect was for his mother to slap him.
But she did. She slapped him hard across the face and left the room. Like it was nothing. Like he was nothing.
Anything after that didn't hurt. He didn't even feel it.
It was as if he had left his body. He could vaguely discern some broken words, something about “bringing filth into his house”, “shame” and “hell”...he could see the blows coming, and his body acted on instinct, raising his arms to protect his head, his face. But he didn't feel it. He didn't feel any of it.  He just cowered on the corner and closed his eyes, praying it would be over soon. Praying he would get tired eventually. Before he hurt him too bad. Before...
“Stephen, what the devil are you doing?!” Emmet knew that voice, that deep voice filling the air around them like thunder. “Have you lost your mind?!”
The blows stopped and he opened his eyes.
Mr. Black was standing right there, with both his arms around his father, draging him away.
“Let me go, Marius!” his father shouted, like a man possessed, while Mr. Black kept holding him back.
“Leave the boy alone, Stephen! You're trying to kill him?”
Emmet tried to get up but he was too dizzy.
“Fin, are you ok?” Evelyn was kneeling next to him, frantically pushing his hair away form his face.
“You called your dad?” he was terrified.
“Of course I did!” she helped him up.
He heard a loud thump and looked up. Mr. Black had flung his father onto the armchair, and was now standing, looming over him. He looked taller than Emmet remembered him, much taller. And his father, sitting on the chair looked so small by comparison.
“Enough!” Mr. Black boomed, and Emmet could had sworn the ground under his feet trembled.
“You don't get it, Marius! You don't know what this...what this boy did!”
“Whatever it was, it doesn't justify this!” Mr. Black took off his thick rimmed glasses and pinched the brigde of his nose, in evident frustration.
His father got back to his feet, standing right in front of Mr. Black and he still looked small.
“This none of your business!”
“You made it my business when you sent my daughter back home in tears, scared out of her wits that you were going to kill her friend!”
“Then take your daughter back home and let ME handle what happen in MY house!” He pushed past Mr. Black and barrelled towards Emmet.
Mr. Black tried to hold him back, but he took a swing at him. Emmet and Evelyn both screamed, but Mr. Black managed to dodge it. He reached for his father again, shoving him so he'd back off.
“Linnie, get Emmet out of here!” Mr. Black told his daughter, and Lyn tried to pull him by his arm, but Emmet couldn't move.
“Stephen, for the love of God, stop! You'll regret this!”Mr. Black pleaded, stepping between Emmet and his father.
“What do you know, Marius?! You don't have a fecking faggot living under your roof! Count your blessings, Marius, because I rather have a dead son than this!”
For a second, a long, agonising second, time seemed to stand still. Emmet could see it on his father's face that he had regretted those words the moment they left his mouth. Not because of what they meant to Emmet. No, he knew his father meant every bit of that. But because he knew, of all the things he could have said to Mr. Black, that was the wrong one.
Emmet had known Mr. Black his entire life. He never saw him raise his voice, he had never seen him angry. He was a gentle man. A man who took them birdwatching on weekends, who bought them magazines and records whenever he went to Ennis or Dublin, who told them about his favorite poets and painters. Emmet didn't think he was physically capable of being anything other than gentle and kind.
But in that moment, he changed.
Emmet never thougth he'd see Mr. Black punch somebody. But he did it. A single punch, right to the side of his father face, so strong, so sudden, he fell to the floor  like rotten fruit falls from a tree.
“Never” he growled in a voice that didn't sound like his voice at all “you hear me, NEVER talk about my son again! You heard me, Stephen!? NEVER! I promise you, you mention my boy ever again, and it will be the end of your sorry life upon this Earth, I promise you!”
“I didn't mean it like, that, you know I didn't...” Emmet watched with disgust as his father tried to get back on his feet, stumbling, humiliated.
“I know exactly what you meant! And you know what you meant, you dirty coward!”
He kept trying to make excuses, but Mr. Black would have none of it.
“You don't know, you have no idea, what it is to bury a child, and I hope to God you never find out.” his voice was calmer, but there was a frightening coolness to it “Are you out of your damned mind?! This is your son! Standing right there while you´re wishing him dead! What I wouldn't give to trade places with you! To have my boy here, alive, like him!”
Emmet was numb. He felt Evelyn rest her head against his shoulder and weep, softly. He wanted to hug her, to do something, anything. But all he could was stare. Stare at his father, trying and failing to stand up to her father, as Mr. Black towered over him, his face filled with righteous, godly, ice-cold anger. And he felt so embarrassed, so ashamed that this man, this petty, pathetic, bumbling excuse of a man was his father.
“Easy for you to say, Marius, but if Paul had been a...”
“I won't hear my son's name from your mouth again, Stephen. Paul is dead. And if I could have him back, I would have him however he was. Trust me, nothing can worse than a dead child. Nothing!”
“That's a pretty sentiment coming from somebody who doesn´t have to live with THAT under your roof! But I won't stand for this! I won't have this in my house!”
“Fine, I'll take him!”
“What?!”
“You don't want him under your roof? I'll solve that problem for you, then. I'll take him. However he is. I'll take him.”
“What on earth happened to you, dear?” Mrs. Black seemed horrified when she laid eyes on him, as Lyn walked him throught the front door. Emmet, still dazed, wondered how bad he must have looked for her react that way. She put her hand on his cheek, and her blue eyes were filled with something he couldn't describe. “What has he done to you?”
Only then did he cry. Only then did he allow himself to sob.
It was Evelyn's mother who held him in her arms as he had, so foolishly, hoped his mother would.
“I...I...told them I...I'm sorry, I...” he pulled back and wiped his tears, suddenly aware that...she didn't know. Mrs. Black went to church with his mother. She didn't know he was...  A rush of panic coursed through him. What would she say? He couldn't. He couldn't go through this twice.
“Take a breath, pet.” she told him, pulling him to sit on the couch. “Linnie, love, go get the first aid kit in the kitchen, we need to patch this lad up a bit. And try not to alarm your sister, if you will. And where is your father?”
“He's waiting for Mrs. Finnerty to get him all of Fin's...I mean, Emmet's stuff.”
Mrs. Black nodded, as if she knew something. As if she had been expecting to be told exactly that. Lyn looked at her mother with the same knowing expression in her eyes and went to the kitchen as intructed.
Emmet felt like runnning away, as far away as he could.
“Mr. Black he said...I'm sorry,I have to...I have to go back, I can't...”
“Emmet, calm down.”
“Mrs. Black, I know you don't want me here. I...I'm...I mean, I...told my parents...”
“I know, pet. I know.”
“No you don't...”
“Emmet, my darling, why do you think I allow you to be in Linnie's room for hours with the door closed? I'm not stupid.” she laughed softly.
“How?”
“A mother just knows...”
“Mine didn't.”
“If she let your father do this, then she's not that competent of a mother is she?” Mrs. Black scoffed. “But, trust me...a mother knows.”
Then it clicked. Then he knew.
“You mean...” he trailed, stunned “...Paul?”
“I carried him inside me 9 months, I birthed him, clothed, fed him, cared for him till the day he left this Earth. Nobody knew him better than I did, except God.”
“God...” he spat out “My mother thinks God will send me to hell. Because the Bible says...”
“Oh pish-posh...I pray on the Bible as well as any Christian, but Jesus knows where I would be if I took  everything it's written in there so seriously. Thou shall now lay with a man, and whatnot, fine, but you don't see anybody that eager to give up their breakfast bacon because the Bibles says it's forbidden, now do you? Your parents didn't stone your sister in the town square when she left the house married for two days and pregnant for 2 months, did they? Like we all didn't know.  Enough of this nonsense, now, we need to get you fixed up. God, you're bleeding.”
“So I really can stay?”
“Do you want to stay?”
“So I stayed.” Fin smiled. He looked up at Doug and took a deep breath, hoping he didn't think it was sillly that he had tears in his eyes over this. But all he saw in Doug's expression was understanding...and love. So much of it.
“I stayed until we both left for college, Lyn and I. She studied history and I went for journalism.Mrs. Black was the one who got me my first camera, then Mr Black gave me my first professional camera, and books about photography and journalism. They did everything for me that a mother and a father would do. I stilll go back with Lyn to spend the holidays with them. Well, with her...He passed away a few months ago. His heart. Funny that of all things, it was his heart that would kill him.”
Doug's hands closed over his.
“Thank you.” he said, quietly. “For telling me all this. I know it wasn't easy.”
“I...” he didn't finish. Over Doug's shoulder he saw the restaurant door open, and Evelyn walk in, wrapped in a long, flowy, flowery dress. “There she is.”
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bladekindeyewear · 3 years
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HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-12-25
I’m not going to spend time BLOGGING an upd8 on Christmas morning!
...yes I am who the fuck am I kidding.  (Bonus stuff and Hiveswap are still well on hold though.)
So are we gonna follow up on the main ship?  Probably not, right, with that perfect Karkat point to cut away, right?  We’re just going to leave Roxy’s question hanging, as well as makeouts etiquette, and leave while having seen a COUPLE FRAMES of non-possessed canon Jade with only whatever fun fanart was inspired across the internet by the moment to tide us over????
Yeah, probably.
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Ugh, more Dirk.  I guess it’s overdue.  :(
> CHAPTER 16. Welcome to my Secret Lair
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Oh huh, I guess not?  So... Jane’s, or Rose and Kanaya’s?
Karkat stays for longer than John thought he would. They talk a bit, but mostly they are quiet. Eventually, Karkat gets called away on yet more important war business, leaving John with one final touch on the shoulder. John leans into it in response, though he’s a bit ashamed of chasing down a sliver of physical affection so soon after obliterating Karkat’s evening like he had.
Pretty much, yeah.  Can’t blame either of them.
When Karkat is finally gone, John still doesn’t move. It isn’t as though he has nowhere else to go, since there are quite a few places he might attempt to make himself useful, for better or for worse.
You’re still abandoning the task that was explicitly yours to protect your literal kid and his friends, but, oh well.  Low-point.  Dave dead, house dead, broke news, I get it.
He just doesn’t feel ready for that yet. The remnants of his house are still smoldering, and he can’t stop staring at them. It would make sense, he thinks, to want to root around through the rubble for anything that’s still intact; some half-charred keepsake to claim as the last thing left that’s still his. But he doesn’t want to do it, and he doesn’t want to think about it. And he still can’t move.
Can’t move.  No Breath huh?  What’s going to get him to, then?
> (==>)
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Oh boy, that might help.  XD  She’s pretty good at that.
> (==>)
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Still with the waistline gap.  And was his phone always yellow like his God-Tier shoes?
ROXY: hey john can u do me a quick solid ROXY: actly idk how quick itll be but its definitely solid ROXY: harry anderson says i just missed u being here but could u skip back on over?
Nice, huh!  No judgment, just a hey-any-chance-you-could-swing-back.  He sort of needs to be needed right now, in a simple, almost everyday non-judgmental way I guess.  (That’s what he NEEDED anyway-- whether he deserved it though is up for debate.)
ROXY: i need help w/smth and yr darling boy is holed up in his room working on some fuckin craft project or other and cant be bothered
YES SEW JOHN A BETTER FITTING FUCKING OUTFIT
ROXY: and now that me and u are freshly on speakin terms again i might as well take advantage of that olive branch and put u to work ROXY: assumin you havent died in an air raid, that is ROXY: which id also be interested in knowin about so if u wld be so kind as to reply instead of leavin me hangin
Heheheh.  Gosh Roxy is always the best.
JOHN: yea yea sorry im here. JOHN: i just had a hard time getting my phone out of these fucking tiny pants.
Hah.
JOHN: and also my house is bombed out so i'm kinda grappling with that. JOHN: but i honestly am not sure how much longer i need to sit around staring at it. trying to align my memories of my youth with whatever is happening right now so JOHN: short version is no i’m not dead, and yeah i can come back over there and help you out. ROXY: oh sweet yr alive and down to do manual labor its a win/win JOHN: see you soon.
Yep!  Pulled away from all the metaphorical, ultra-meaningful bullshit, back to some brass tacks with some easy humor.  Definitely something Roxy can do well.~
> (==>)
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EXCUSE ME.  What is that outfit and pose.  Did you--
ROXY: sup ROXY: follow me ROXY: well were just going to my room so i guess technically u know the way JOHN: haha ok.
Did you invite him over for the manual labor of banging you while your son is sewing in the other room
Or maybe the labor is making him a new sibling.  JFC
Is this plan part of why we got the sudden content warning that was mocked or was that mainly for Hiveswap 
John follows, trying to shake the ominous feeling he got from what she’d just said. He’d been in and out of this house a lot in the past few days. Why should this be any different?
I DUNNO JOHN DOES THIS SEEM DIFFERENT TO YOU
> (==>)
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Yea this seems like a fucc room.
JOHN: it’s not like i could forget! ROXY: ya i guess u only really saw the living room when you were here the other day but i have changed some stuff up ROXY: done a lil redecoratin here n there
So it’s MORE of a fucc room than previously >__>”
ROXY: may have to do a smidge more if my old bff decides im next on the list for bombing out ROXY: but so far so good
Ah geez.
ROXY: just a coupla exploded cars in the yard from some shenanigans our dear son and his friends were in but u kno it is what it is!!!
Well, that’ll buff out easy.
ROXY: can i get u anything? ROXY: just made some coffee JOHN: no, uh, i’m good.
Of course she has a fancy handled winecoffeeglass  (and the handle does look ridiculous but it’d be too hot to hold otherwise)
Roxy shrugs and swirls her own coffee around in her novelty mug. John looks around. A lot about the room is the same. The family photos, the rug. There’s a lot more cat stuff in there now, though. The bed is new. John feels like he’s about to take a test he hasn’t studied for. He makes himself focus on what she’s saying.
That would be the feeling.
> (==>)
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MY GOD.  Roxy is so fucking good at this holy shit
She KNOWS she’s making him squirm and she loves it
JOHN: so uh anyway. JOHN: what was this favor? ROXY: yo why dont u just come rest yr tush for a bit ROXY: take a lil relax next 2 me here JOHN: haha uh. JOHN: roxy i uh. JOHN: im flattered, but i don’t know if that’s really the right step right now. JOHN: don’t get me wrong, everything seems so fucked up right now that when i try to think about what might actually BE the right step, it feels like a huge cartoon question mark might physically manifest over my head. JOHN: but I’m not sure if um rekindling our physical relationship is really the best--
So is Roxy trolling him, about to reveal she wasn’t thinking of sex and was just making things seem sultry?  Or just had “lol jk” as an option-select, maybe.
> (==>)
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ROXY: r u kiddin me rn egbert JOHN: i’m not? unless you were, in which case yeah lets say i was also kidding. JOHN: oh my god, i’m sorry, i don’t know why this making me freak out.
OH NOOO NOT THE DISDAAAAIN - CRITICAL HIT D:
ROXY: i remember our past boot knockin with fondness but that is a situation im not interested in revisiting
boot knockin XD
ROXY: look john ROXY: i was trying to be polite about it ROXY: offering u sustenance n rest n all ROXY: but you look like shit ROXY: i just wanted to catch up on the whole heinous war situation were in and maybe check in on e/o before leaping strait to the real n actual nonsexual manual labor favor i have in mind for u JOHN: oh.
Hey, she can’t help looking sexy she’s too good at it.
Is the manual labor moving the crashed cars?  Can’t Roxy pull that off on her own, or... banish the cars to the void or something?  (Oh, but WOULD she want to do it on her own when she can rope in John and bring him down to earth by giving him a useful task?  And admittedly his strength and wallet would make things easier.)
John feels his shoulders unbunch. Of course. Yeah. He’s almost embarrassed by how relieved he feels. So what if his ex wife wanted to hook up? Shouldn’t that be a situation he could navigate? Don’t people like to find solace in human physical connection during dire times? Why did the idea of it make his mind white out in panic more than, say, any number of the traumas he just experienced?
Probably some gender stuff mixed up in there too, June.
He doesn’t know, but he believes Roxy that he must look pretty haggard. He probably feels haggard? Maybe sitting down will feel better.
Just put your feet up yeah
> (==>)
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WHAT A CUTE IMAGE
JOHN: sorry. like i said, my "how to react to stuff" meter is completely fucked right now. ROXY: thats fair bud
she’s used to being patient with you don’t worry otherwise you never would’ve gotten this far
ROXY: real fast i do need to do a quick takeback of all that shit i said last time we talked about janey not being literally the most evil person we knew or whatever ROXY: i guess i was hopped up on arguin or somethin since that was before we hit our conversational vibe bc of course u were right and i shoulda listened
Ouch.  Yeah, we saw just lately just how far off the deep end she was.  (Where was that funny upd8 reaction art summarizing the bit where Kanaya was holding Tavros hostage and Jane was transparently debating “hmm do I let my son die?” and Kanaya and Tavros were just looking at each-other flat-mouthed nervous?  I REALLY wanted to share that but I don’t usually want to reblog or put most stuff HS^2 not under a read-more, for spoiler purposes, usually.)
ROXY: im just glad ur ok ROXY: or like alive JOHN: yeah, jury's still out on "ok" but, you know. ROXY: ya ROXY: u said ur house is gone?? JOHN: yep. JOHN: completely. ROXY: jeez ROXY: i would ask how ur feelin but like the answer 2 that has got 2b "prtty bad"
Talk it ouuuut~~  get those feels out there and articulated john
JOHN: yeah. JOHN: i mean. JOHN: no? JOHN: it’s weird. JOHN: it feels like it should be a bigger deal, I guess? JOHN: like it’s my HOUSE. JOHN: but mostly it always felt like my dad’s house? JOHN: and when i started living there after i moved out of here, it was like i crammed myself back into whatever was left of my kid self? JOHN: and it didn’t feel good, but it at least was familiar, you know? JOHN: like living there let me feel closer to my dad, trying to be like the way i remember him, or like how i remember him wanting me to be, or something? JOHN: and i didn’t realize how much i hated doing that until i saw it all go up in flames. JOHN: so i guess i could have used my powers to stop the fire and save whatever was left of the place, but i couldn’t bring myself to do it. JOHN: like some fucked up part of me was glad i got there too late? JOHN: so i just sat there, watching, trying to figure out why watching my house burn down felt like i was being released from prison. JOHN: and even now i keep trying to explain it away, as though it’s because of how fucked up everything else is that it made me feel good. JOHN: but that’s just bullshit. JOHN: it DID feel good. JOHN: i DO feel free. JOHN: sorry.
I was kind of saying some Breath/Blood stuff at the time of him losing his last tie to his stubborn sticking-to-his-kid-self bit?  Except now we’re mixing it in with June Egbert and his gender-identity questions too.
ROXY: no need 2 apologize ROXY: we just delved in2 my whole gender thing last time so it seems fine for u to have a turn JOHN: i didn’t say it was a gender thing.
Oh shit
ROXY: well no i just meant like i did some sharing ROXY: like referrin 2 the topic i brought up when we chatted last ROXY: but like now that u mention it ROXY: *meaningful pause* JOHN: … JOHN: i JOHN: ROXY: lol well we can move on 2 the favor part if youd rather ROXY: stick a lil pin in that topic n come back 2 it when u have had sleep
Are you just INCREDIBLY incisive Roxy or have you and John talked about this before?
ROXY: like i said the other day its not like this shits figureoutable in 1 sitting anyways JOHN: yeah... ROXY: sooooooo ROXY: movin on
It’s just fine for Roxy to slow-roll this yeah, if she’s going to pry open that door a little
ROXY: dont be mad but theres a part of the house u didnt know abt the whole time u lived here JOHN: what? ROXY: yea ROXY: i got a secret lair ROXY: for my sciences
OH FUCK YES SCIENCE LAB, of COURSE Roxy would want a cool science lab basement because she always wants a cool science lab basement
ROXY: and i get to it via a transportalizer underneath our bed ROXY: which is 2 heavy 2 move by my lonesome so i just needed to borrow some o your aforementioned powers of wind
Okay no.  Wait.  What the fuck?
First of all, as funny and MSPaintAdventures-y as furniture being in the way of things is, why would you block it with a bed too heavy to move, but,
Second of all, more importantly, how is a GOD-TIER ROXY not strong enough to lift a heavy bed?!?!?!?  Either she’s lying to get John involved in things or this is a gendered cop-out because these characters are superheroes at the TOP of their echeladders, given obnoxiously powerful video-game strength and athletics only to then have ascended into DEITIES.  God-Tier Roxy could probably have lifted a bed like that when she was SEVENTEEN!  And now she’s an ADULT, out-of-shape or otherwise!  If this were a whole CAR I might be willing to handwave it, but just a heavy BED?!?  And none of the GUYS are going to have this much trouble lifting a bed like this, are they??  This just feels like following classic cartoony gender tropes in the complete absence of these characters’ super powers, what the fuck, and also Roxy if you didn’t make it Transportalizer-only access you could have given it an entrance you could phase through with your fancy powers to get to.  FUCK.
This feels stupid.
ROXY: so if u dont mind woosh away JOHN: uh ok, well... JOHN: a secret science lair, sure, i can deal with that. JOHN: why not! JOHN: it doesn’t work out great when i do the windy thing indoors, though. ROXY: aight then no wind bending just use your mangrit
Roxy flexes, the corner of her mouth pulled up into a familiar grin. John feels his guts, so recently calmed, twist up into knots again. Her eyebrows shoot up and the smile loosens. He must have shown something on his face.
You’re already THIS sensitive about gendertalk?
ROXY: ok or just like push when i push ROXY: we both got sick muscles ROXY: no other adjectives necessary JOHN: yeah ok. ROXY: on 3?
Please, please reinforce the idea that they both have sick strength, because they fucking do and the idea that Roxy actually a hundred percent NEEDED John to do this is BS.
> (==>)
JOHN: holy shit? ROXY: sorry to lop yet another huge scoop onto ur lil brains ice cream revelation sundae JOHN: so wait, if this thing's always been under the bed, how’d you get down here before without me? ROXY: well thats neither here nor there john JOHN: i mean it is kinda. Here. ROXY: fine ok checkmate ROXY: i dont ACTUALLY need ur nerdgrit for this escapade ROXY: like im sorry but i said it ROXY: i mostly just wanted to see you and show u wats down here
THANK FUCKING CHRIST.
If that wasn’t actually just a lie to get him involved I was going to stay SO mad.  Of COURSE Roxy can move a fucking BED no matter how heavy it is.  OF COURSE.
ROXY: and also uve been ~sent for~ JOHN: ok but like ROXY: john i am inviting u 2 my inner sanctum ROXY: i am literally bringing out the word "sanctum" in case u werent already clued in 2 how cool this is ROXY: so do u wanna go into my secret lair or wat JOHN: yeah!? JOHN: yes? i guess? ROXY: aight good
Yes John of course you want to stop fighting it
ROXY: then as they told me in the hospital before lil h a was born ROXY: just push
eyeroll, but yeah, of course
> (==>)
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Oh cool, sprite form version of her loungewear.
> (==>)
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Sorry for my compulsion to post every full-frame image of Roxy in this awesome outfi-WERE YOU KEEPING CALLIOPE UNDER YOUR BED THIS WHOLE TIME?!?????
That’s like... almost a fucking metaphor isn’t it????  For the relationship you preferred in the other timeline and possibly THIS one TOO or
ROXY: hey callieee i got him ROXY: o damn john sorry i shoulda also told u callies here weve been hangin out again ROXY: 1 more freak for ur bean
Oh huh, so this isn’t an always thing.  And these two can get close in more than one timeline where it would’ve worked out nicely.  :)
JOHN: oh it's ok, my bean feels pretty well adjusted to freakage at this point so keep them coming if you like! ROXY: k cool i will JOHN: do i get to know what that big thing under the sheet is? ROXY: hmmmmmm no JOHN: oh ok. JOHN: are you sure? i mean, it seems like a pretty prominent feature of the room. JOHN: space. JOHN: wherever we are. ROXY: and a totally mysterious n COMPLETELY inconspicuous feature it will have to remain for now ROXY: we r kinda in a hurry here fyi ROXY: and by that i mean ROXY: we are in precisely the amount of hurry that means im excused from having to a that specific q rn JOHN: right, sorry. JOHN: i will pay no attention to the object behind the curtain. ROXY: u catch on fast egbert ROXY: anyway theres more cool info coming so just follow me
I don’t have any big theories.  Is it just the Hiveswap device or something?  If Calliope helped with it it’d help explain the Cherubic theme.
> (==>)
JOHN: so... this is all downstairs? JOHN: it seems like you had a lot of work done. ROXY: well no not x actly ROXY: were in the old meteor JOHN: under the house??? ROXY: ok so ROXY: in hindsight it may have been a bit misleading 2 say like ROXY: "downstairs" ROXY: in reference to a place which is hells of buried underground and may not actually be literally under the house ROXY: but there is no time to explain all that rn john so instead im going to refer u to my adorable little green friend here CALLIOPE: #U_U# ROXY: (hehe) CALLIOPE: *AHEM* CALLIOPE: hi john! CALLIOPE: long time no see. ^u^
Cherubs just really like dark cavelike places full of weird tech don’t they.
> (==>)
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THEY’RE SO CUTE
JOHN: oh, uh. hey callie! JOHN: it sure has been a while huh. JOHN: now that i think about it, the last time the three of us hung out like this... CALLIOPE: was when i was aggressively third wheeling yoUr prenUptial coUrtship? CALLIOPE: if yoU dont mind, john, i'd rather not rehash that period of oUr lives. CALLIOPE: it was more than a little painfUl for me. JOHN: oh. JOHN: god, jeez, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to-- CALLIOPE: hee hee john i am only pUlling yoUr leg, don't worry. CALLIOPE: if anything i was personally a little thrilled with how things shook oUt in that respect. CALLIOPE: imagine, if yoU will, a yoUng cherUb raised in solitUde, whose only solace was the convolUted and tUmUltUoUs romantic schemata she projected onto her only friends from another Universe. CALLIOPE: and then fUrther imagine that this yoUng cherUb, throUgh varioUs even *more* convolUted contrivances, ended Up in the company of those selfsafe friends as an eqUal participant in their sphere of social discoUrse! CALLIOPE: it is a joy the like of which yoU possibly cannot fathom. u_u
Reinforcing that things turning out this way was in fact the FANTASY that Calliope was writing over in the Canon timeline.  Just, heavily, HEAVILY implied that the Candy timeline is -- or at least originated as -- Calliope’s fanfiction as a Muse of Space, and its competition for audience interest with canon is the essential conflict between alt!Calliope and Dirk (or Dirk and Andrew Hussie).
CALLIOPE: so to pUt it simply, getting to experience sUch emotional drama myself was an impossibly enriching experience. CALLIOPE: possibly a first for my species! CALLIOPE: it's actUally qUite interesting, if yoU ROXY: *nudge* CALLIOPE: oh, right. yes. i'm getting a little carried away, haha. CALLIOPE: argh, i'm sorry, this is not how i planned to begin this vital conversation.
Vital conversation?  What sorta truth-bombs are coming?
CALLIOPE: but to sUmmarise, what i was trying to say is: CALLIOPE: don't beat yourself Up aboUt it john. CALLIOPE: besides, hUman divorces are even more fascinating than i had ever imagined, and being able to witness yoUrs in motion was an honoUr. CALLIOPE: so i consider Us aboUt even at this point. JOHN: hahaha!!! JOHN: okay, well that's good to know! CALLIOPE: ^u^
Holy SHIT that was savage!  And we’ll NEVER know whether or not she really intended it so savagely, either.~
JOHN: so um... JOHN: i hear that there's this big secret thing you wanna tell me about? CALLIOPE: oh right, yes of course! CALLIOPE: let me jUst say first of all how thrilled i am that yoU're on board. CALLIOPE: i wasn't sUre if yoUr natUral inclinations woUld have preclUded yoUr coming to such a place as this, and yet here yoU are. CALLIOPE: this whole endeavoUr will be *so* mUch easier with yoUr help.
Uh oh.
Hopefully babies aren’t involved.
JOHN: oh! well, shucks. JOHN: not really sure what that means but i'm just glad to be of use somewhere, haha. JOHN: which, speaking of somewhere, CALLIOPE: ah right, right. yoU're probably a little cUrioUs as to where the dickens we are. CALLIOPE: how much do yoU know aboUt black holes? JOHN: um... like, the big space things? CALLIOPE: they aren't always big actUally, and in fact their relative smallness is practically their defining qUality. JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: bUt okay i think we are on the same page. CALLIOPE: so, what if i told yoU that we are inside of a black hole right now.
Oh dear, we’re getting into the canon/noncanon divide?
JOHN: um... JOHN: like, HERE? JOHN: we just transportalized into a black hole? CALLIOPE: no, i mean, what if oUr whole WORLD was inside a black hole. JOHN: ok.
Yeah, that’s gonna be John’s reaction.  “ok.”  Pretty much inevitable.
CALLIOPE: earth c, or at least oUr version of it, has, from the moment we crossed the victory threshold, been inside a black hole. JOHN: ok. CALLIOPE: and not just any black hole, bUt the very black hole in which the green sUn Ultimately met its demise, allowing oUr victory in the first instance! JOHN: huh! ROXY: ("huh!") ROXY: (rofl my fucking ao egbert) JOHN: (shhhh!)
And Roxy enjoys his non-reaction reactions as much as we do, hehe.
CALLIOPE: bUt, paradoxically, the critical moment which determined its capture within the black hole happened *after* that point. CALLIOPE: i refer of coUrse to yoUr decision not to retUrn to the mediUm and fight my brother. JOHN: wait, wait. JOHN: you mean, the meat and candy thing? JOHN: oh my god. JOHN: you mean i actually DID make a mistake that day. CALLIOPE: well, that's not exactly what that-- JOHN: ugh, i fucking KNEW it! JOHN: i'm so sorry. JOHN: i'm so sorry that i put the earth inside a black hole everyone. ): ROXY: john ROXY: listen ROXY: u have got to get out of this mindset i am begging you JOHN: ):
Yeah shake him out of this shit.
ROXY: your choice literally didnt matter ROXY: the whole thing was symbolic in the first place ROXY: literally symbolic in the case of the picnic i mean come on ROXY: it was just some steak and a plate of candy suckers JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: i mean, i wouldn't go so far as to say that the meal we shared was unimportant, given the sacred significance of the two options i presented. CALLIOPE: but yes, yoUr choice of snack was infinitely less important than the choice which it presaged. CALLIOPE: and even then, calling it a choice woUld be sorely misleading. CALLIOPE: think of it like a coin flip. CALLIOPE: the series of events that led to Us being trapped beyond the event horizon of an Ubermassive black hole could be considered "tails", while the events which would have occUrred otherwise could be considered "heads". CALLIOPE: since both were possible, and paradox space is the way it is, they actUally both happened. and we jUst "happened" (hee hee) to get tails instead of heads. JOHN: you mean we ended up with the bad possibility. CALLIOPE: not at all! since both possibilities depend on one another's existence, it really doesn't make sense to call them "right" or "wrong". they both just "are". JOHN: o...kay... CALLIOPE: u_u
Yeah, it’s going to take a bit more than that to convince him he didn’t make the “wrong decision”.
CALLIOPE: i realise that this may be a lot to process. CALLIOPE: it's easy to forget that this wasn't obvioUs to everyone from the beginning. CALLIOPE: anyway, the reason i went on this tangent in the first place was to explain that the space we are standing in right now has a special significance, in that it is the location which corresponds to the black hole's singUlarity. JOHN: oh, wow. JOHN: um. JOHN: ok so, sorry if this is a dumb question to ask suddenly, but what does being inside of a black hole actually... mean for us? JOHN: is that bad? JOHN: is it like in movie, um, JOHN: shoot. JOHN: roxy what was that matthew mcconaughey movie from your earth that we watched? ROXY: u mean interstellar JOHN: RIGHT. JOHN: the one with the organ. JOHN: man. i cried at that movie so much. ROXY: lol u can say that again ROXY: iirc at least part of y u got so weepy was the fact that u couldnt believe a version of earth existed where ppl got 2 watch more mcconaughey films than you JOHN: listen. JOHN: i simply don't think you all appreciated the gift you were given. CALLIOPE: i don't believe i'm familiar with this particular film ^u^;; ROXY: oh dont worry cal you didnt miss much JOHN: (gasp)
This is all gold
ROXY: but the important point is that no its not really an interstellar type situation here egbert ROXY: ur not gonna enter a weird time vortex and change the trajectory of a little girls life with the power of love JOHN: aw.
Dammit, now we have to be on the lookout for that possibility.  Or it did sort of already happen more than once to John.  ...Whatever.
CALLIOPE: to go back to your original question, john. CALLIOPE: it's not strictly speaking "bad" for Us to be inside of a black hole, mUch thoUgh that contradicts most of what anyone knows about them. CALLIOPE: of coUrse, if we had fallen into it, that woUld be a whole other kettle of fish. CALLIOPE: the tidal forces woUld have stretched Us all into spaghetti and then ripped us apart! CALLIOPE: bUt the natUre of oUr arrival was more akin to simply "being" here, sUddenly. one moment we were not, and the next moment we were, and somehow always had been. CALLIOPE: in everyday, practical terms, being inside of a black hole has very little bearing on Us. CALLIOPE: i mean, the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here, bUt for the most part it doesn't seem to be anything too oUt of the ordinary. CALLIOPE: bUt beyond that, it means that we are sealed away from the rest of existence. CALLIOPE: oUr sphere of inflUence is limited to the sphere of the black hole's bounding horizon. CALLIOPE: as far as everyone else is concerned, we might as well not even exist! JOHN: is there no way we could let anyone know that we're in here...? CALLIOPE: almost certainly not!
No?  So this doesn’t have to do with the divide?
CALLIOPE: there are very few ways for anything to escape the kind of predicament that we are in right now. one of them is to be an all-powerfUl being with control over the very fabric of space, with the energy of two Universes at yoUr disposal. CALLIOPE: in which case, escape woUld become rather trivial, if a little Unscientific. JOHN: ok. i am going to assume that we can't just do that. CALLIOPE: yoU've hit the nail on the head, UnfortUnately. U_U CALLIOPE: the method i described was the one employed by my alternate self, who yoU may recall crashed through the event horizon in the body that once belonged to jade harley. CALLIOPE: she departed through a pUnctUre she created in the black hole's surface shortly after consUming my brother, a deed which provided her with the necessary "oomph", and which was frankly rather breathtaking to watch. =u= CALLIOPE: bUt Upon her departUre, the rift closed for good. as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.
What the heck?  Calliope SAW all this?  Is this her Muse powers at work, letting her observe these things, or was she there?  And John certainly did NOT see ANY of what Calliope just said happen.
CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!
So we’re going to find that out if we haven’t already.  Maybe something to do with the way Vrissy just conks out narcoleptically?
JOHN: ...right. JOHN: so... let me just get this straight. JOHN: knowing that we're inside of a black hole... does that actually change anything? JOHN: like, can't we just go on living like normal? CALLIOPE: oh absolUtely not. CALLIOPE: i don't know if yoU've noticed john bUt this world is on the brink of a total cataclysm. JOHN: oh.
Um, what?
CALLIOPE: oUr exclUsion from the overarching coUrse of events which governs all reality means that oUr existence here is liable to dramatic and violent Upheaval. CALLIOPE: to pUt it another way, becaUse nothing in here "matters", we are likely to be sUbjected to things which are a bit bats in the belfry, for no reason other than it's totally insignificant to the wider canon of reality. CALLIOPE: and mUch thoUgh i am personally titillated by some of the conseqUences of this predicament, it is a degrading way for Us to live. u_u JOHN: that's... certainly one way to put it, yeah...
No plot-armor for your entire timeline, I guess, yep.  Outside of canon, we can imagine and write about ANYTHING happening to the characters, or just drop their existence entirely, much like a doomed offshoot timeline.  It’s a plot stability that depended heavily on the threat of Lord English and being trapped in a story, and without it things are bound to see a BIT chaotic (or “degrading” if you view it as subjected to the whims of fanfic writers, certainly).
CALLIOPE: at first, i believed that this was simply necessary. Us playing tails to oUr coUnterparts' heads, the black to their white, and so forth. CALLIOPE: bUt over the years i have come to the conclUsion that this is simply not kosher. ROXY: its total bs is what it is CALLIOPE: right, yes. CALLIOPE: a steaming pile of bUllshite. CALLIOPE: and so we have decided that something needs to be done aboUt it.
Ah fuck.  You’re going to regulate non-canon?  “Canonize” it?  Is the fact that you eventually succeed at whatever it is you’re trying to do part of why we have the story presented to us in this bifurcated structure?
ROXY: this is finally where u come in jegbert ROXY: we gots quests for yous CALLIOPE: hee hee, yes. CALLIOPE: or *a* quest, to be specific. JOHN: oh boy! ROXY: (this fkin nerd i s2g)
Roxy and Calliope setting him on this quest as a Rogue of Void and a Muse of Space feels fitting.
JOHN: i'm not sure how i can go about freeing us from a hellish space prison, but i'm up for giving it a try i guess? JOHN: i have... literally nothing better to be doing at this point. except for maybe hanging out with harry anderson. ROXY: nice save lol
YEAH WE’RE STILL GLOSSING OVER HOW YOU LEFT HIM UNPROTECTED, JERK
ROXY: but u dont need to worry abt busting us outta space jail tbh ROXY: thats not ur problem to fix JOHN: oh. JOHN: i'm... not sure i follow, then. ROXY: i mean yeah ur gonna obvs facilitate it in a sense ROXY: but only by going and busting the person who can actually help us outta normal earth jail CALLIOPE: we need yoU to free vriska from the clUtches of oUr misgUided friend jane, and bring her here, to the singUlarity. ROXY: weve been calling it the plot point CALLIOPE: yes, the plot point is a key part of oUr plan. CALLIOPE: as far as we have been able to sUrmise, the only remaining method for escaping oUr grim confinement depends on leveraging the UniqUe properties of this location to create an event of sUch catalcysmic proportions that it simply cannot be contained within the black hole any more. CALLIOPE: something SO dramatic, so hyper-relevant, that it becomes ontologically impossible for anyone to ignore it. CALLIOPE: for that, we need an individUal of sUfficient narrative cloUt, so to speak. CALLIOPE: and to liberate her, who better than the embodiment of the aspect of freedom itself? CALLIOPE: ... CALLIOPE: phew. okay, i'm finished. CALLIOPE: CALLIOPE: sorry, that took longer than i expected to go throUgh.
..............................
OOooooh, kay.
Whatever this is, it’s going to be really weird and PROBABLY infuriating and/or shippy, and I’m probably not going to like it.  Plus it seems like it’s some sort of inverse belated canonization of some other black-hole-rescue theories I went on about at some point.  Although, related to that link, “aspect of freedom” if anyone wasn’t paying attention!  That’s a (sorta-)canon mention of the purpose of it!
They’re going to attention-wh-- attention-hog themselves out of the black hole so that they’re “considered canon” too, or close enough.  Huh.
ROXY: what r u talking about cals that was great ROXY: i could listen 2 u plotsplain for years CALLIOPE: oh you >u< ROXY: fyi this was why i wanted u to get a move on eggbread ROXY: so callie could have more time 2 infodump ROXY: thats love bitchhhhhh JOHN: hahaha. JOHN: ok, well, i think i understood all that?
Love with who? Callie, John, both?
In reality, John isn’t sure what most of this means. But on balance, it feels okay? He’s gone back and forth about a hundred times in the last week about where his place in everything is, so he might as well ride this out. Plus, the last time a Lalonde kind of told him to do something, he thinks that he chose not to, and look where that got him. And it’s not like he has other plans. He may as well do this! It’s at least going to get him involved in things again, if nothing else. He turns to go, and then hears a sound. It’s the sound of feet and knocking on doors, echoed through stone and digital static.
Oh shit.  Is Andrew trapped behind some fourth walls behind the curtains.
> (==>)
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Oh RIGHT also that DEVICE is where they want to bring Vriska.  Are they going to overturn part of canon itself with a super-retcon thus making this timeline unbelievably relevant or--?  Maybe make all the PESTERQUESTS canon or something?!  I don’t know.  Maybe they’re INTENTIONALLY starting the game like Vriska wanted to??????
Guh, this is something so big that I don’t WANT to theorize about it, do I.
JOHN: did you hear that? ROXY: wha ROXY: oh yeah uh ROXY: i may have messaged rose and kan and jade to check on them too ROXY: so its prob onea them showin up ROXY: they don’t need to know bout all this tho ROXY: we got time to chat with them b4 u go get vriska
No, even if it’s a knock at the somehow-top-level-house-even-under-buried-- oh, right, maybe it’s covering in part a monitoring system that looks up there.  But still, part of that sound was DOUBTLESS these two hiding something, all standing in front of the curtain like that.
JOHN: i’ll go stall em. ROXY: thx babe ROXY: oh is it 2 soon for that joke or JOHN: no, weirdly enough, that one’s fine. ROXY: oh good ok see u up there soon!
How is calling your significant other “babe” not cool REGARDLESS of gender?!  Like wasn’t that always cool? --Oh wait is it because they’re not together or... but... guh, I don’t know.
Anyway, see y’all after the holidays at least.
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ikejes · 4 years
Text
Andromeda Six Left 4 Dead AU
I got like 5 notes on the post asking if people are interested in an andromeda six left 4 dead au so here it is jdskfskdjf featuring messy scribbles and extreme self indulgence
Basic Premise
Before the apocalypse: Fenris was the CEO of some big company, so he, his wife, his two girlfriends and their kids were there living in some big, walled up house. When the infection broke out, they were essentially isolated in the house and Fenris just kept doing his work online and not caring about the people that were dying and turning. Zovack was the CEO of another company and Vexx was some sort of liaison. Vexx visited the Peg’asi home in person, but was a carrier (asymptomatic). He infected them all except Traveler.
Apocalypse: In a more canon compliant version, Traveler runs and ends up knocked out by a Charger (or something) and is picked up by a group of survivors, the A6. That’s all great but the version I find more entertaining is: Traveler ends up alone in their huge, fairly self sufficient house. Fenris had intended to stay there instead of evacuating like most, so he’d had things like solar panels put in. Someone living there could survive fairly well on their own without lacking too many basic supplies, so Traveler starts taking in survivors and functioning as a safe house of a sort. 
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Ayame and Calderon are the first of the LIs to appear. They show up in the middle of a horde, Cal heavily injured and Aya barely able to keep them both standing, banging on the gate to be let in. Traveler takes them in and tends to Cal’s wounds as best they can, but the two of them have to stay for a while as he heals. By the time he’s fully capable again, it seems like it would make more sense for them to just stay. Traveler does need help taking care of the house, after all.
Later, Calderon becomes the de facto leader of their growing group and Aya (and Damon and June) goes on supply runs. (zombies run inspired? no of course not what are you talking about)
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(damon here looking exactly the same as in game lmao)
Damon is the next to arrive, fully intending to just get a night’s sleep in a real bed (instead of the concrete safe room floors) and be gone by the next morning, but the temptation of a semi reliable food source and water that you don’t have to filter yourself is too tempting and he ends up staying another night. And another. It doesn’t take too long for the three already living there to recognize his skill in combat and offer him a place to stay permanently. He agrees in the knowledge that he can leave whenever he wants.
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It’s a little while between Damon and June’s arrivals. The four of them already living there have a fairly solid dynamic established and don’t necessarily need another person to keep their safe house running. Then, June shows up, devastated by the sudden loss of his brother to the infection and needing a place to stay for a while to recover. His strength and skill with a gun is clear and it’s Aya who suggests that he stays permanently.
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While on a supply run, June finds Bash fighting for his life in the middle of a horde, still unaccustomed to swinging and shooting with only one arm. Together, they escape and make it relatively unscathed to the next safe room. June mentions the safe house he lives in, closer than the next safe room, more comfortable, and if Bash doesn’t have anywhere he needs to be, probably the best place to go if the swarms are this bad right now. Bash agrees. While he’s there, he notices that one of their emergency generators is out and offers to fix it. Seeing his skill, the others immediately ask if he would want to stay.
Later, Ryona appears at the safe house, having just lost every one of the friends she was traveling with to a group of violent raiders. She was able to hide, but she was the only one. When Bash had lost his arm, she was the one who found him and patched him up so when he recognizes her he immediately offers her a place to stay, too.
Side characters:
Oppo runs a trading outpost. Without a standardized currency system, they are able to effectively scam the majority of their customers. They have wares that are almost impossible to find anywhere else, however, and if one knows how to deal with them they can be very helpful.
Alisa and Zane are the leaders of the two rival gangs struggling for control over a city not far from the one Traveler’s house is in. Without a reliable method of keeping the infected out of their territory, they and their respective gangs have become very good at fighting.
Voice Lines
I also wrote out some example L4D voice lines for the LIs and drew them hurt to go with the lines. I intended to just quickly slap some color on them but ended up putting WAY more effort into it than I had to lmao. swear words censored because tumblr really likes to hide posts i swear in
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Critically hurt lines:
Aya:
- Guys, don’t leave me behind
- I can’t die... can’t leave them behind...
- Sh*t, I’m too pretty to die...
- Anyone got a medkit for me?
- I gotta keep going...
- I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die.
Ryona:
- Huff... it looks like I could use some help this time...
- Is there any kingsfoil around? I really need it, unless someone still has a medkit
- No, I need to keep going, need to show them...
- (someone else: Hey, you need help) No, no, you need to keep your medkit for yourself
Damon:
- I’ll crawl my way back out of hell if I have to
- I ain’t gonna die because of something like this...
- If anyone has a medkit, now would be a great time to let me know
- F*ck, I’m not dying!
Bash:
- This really, really hurts...
- Anyone up to carry me to the safe room? heh...
- Wait, everyone, I can’t go too fast right now
- This isn’t it, not after everything...
June:
- I will not let this kill me
- This is... this really hurts...
- I’m sorry, I don’t know if I can make it
- I need help, please
Cal:
- Goddamn it, I don’t know how much longer I’ll be standing
- If I die here, I need you all to do as Damon says. He’ll get you to safety.
- Listen to me. If I go down, you all have to go on without me.
- Does anyone have a medpack?!
Zombies
No Left 4 Dead AU is complete without deciding what type of infected the characters would be! Here’s what I got:
Aya: Hunter
June: Smoker
Damon: Hunter
Calderon: Charger
Ryona: Witch
Bash: Jockey
Vexx: Spitter
Conclusion
I’m not sure how much of an overlap there is between the A6 and L4D fanbases but if anyone’s even a little bit interested please talk to me about this au lmao. Also, if anyone wants to reblog this with info about their traveler in this au please do that too! I want to hear about it!
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skzsauce01 · 4 years
Text
42nd Moon Pt 11
Description: By some stroke of luck, you get off the waitlist of your biology class. You’d never have guessed you’d find your soulmate there, let alone that he already has a girlfriend… Or that he comes from a fraternity of werewolves.
Warning: animal attacking/attacked, slight horror
Word count: 1.7k
Pairing: werewolf!Hyunjin x fem!reader, werewolf!Jisung x fem!reader
Chapter List
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“-- then he stuffed ice cream in my mouth while I was sleeping! Those guys just won’t let me live!”
You let out a laugh at your friend’s story as you trudge through the roots and leaves, trying to keep up with the energetic toddler in front of you.
Jisung smiles to himself and lets your melodic sound ring in his ears. It’s moments like these that he cherishes the most. Although he is exhausted from last night’s full moon activities, he’s glad he didn’t pass up the opportunity to come with you when the child begged for a walk through her favourite mountain.
“And you ate it?” you scoff humorously.
“Yes! I could have choked!” 
He waves his hands around animatedly and you can’t help but turn around and laugh at his shenanigans. As you do so, you miss a bump on the ground and lose your footing.
“Y/N!” Jisung is quick on his feet. He turns wolf to race to your location and turns back right as you fall into his arms.
“Sorry,” you groan, lifting a hand to brush away your bangs.
“N-no problem,” he stutters, heart pounding from the proximity. He shakes his head to get rid of such thoughts. No more, he scolds himself.
“What did I trip on?” you wonder once Jisung’s put you back on your feet.
You look down, and your eyes widen into giant disks. It’s a--!
“Bear!” Jisung yells.
You indeed are looking at a baby cub with a gunshot wound in its side. However, it isn’t what Jisung is referring to.
You look up to see a full grown Asian black bear snarling at you. You can only assume she’s its mother.
“Jisung,” you ask with as much composure as you can muster, “what are our chances?”
“Not good,” he replies. “Especially since there’s also her.”
You follow where he’s pointing and see Hyunjin’s daughter approaching the mother bear with child-like curiosity.
“Okay, let’s back away from the cub first,” you suggest.
The mama bear runs to her baby as soon as you and Jisung step away with your hands raised up in the air. You are about to let out a breath of relief when the mother bear snaps her head up and lets out a pained and dangerous roar. She has found the injury on her child and that the future is bleak for the shot cub.
Jisung mutters a curse. “Y/N, I’m going to get the kid, and then you’re going to jump on my back and we’re out of here, okay?”
“No, wait,” you object in the middle of yelling anything you can to get the child away from the bear. “That won’t work; not in your condition. You should run back to the house and get help.”
“I’m not leaving you here alone,” Jisung deadpans.
“Yes you are or we’re all dead.”
“Still--”
“Jisung, I’m dying anyway!” 
Your anxiety gets the better of you and you scream at your companion. This startles the toddler and she begins crying, which alarms the mother bear. You watch in horror as she stands on her hind legs, about to obliterate the wailing child. On instincts, you lunge forward and wrap yourself around her tiny body. You brace yourself for the pain, but it doesn’t come. You lift your head to see why right as Jisung takes the blow for you and is sent soaring through the air before tumbling meters across the ground.
Jisung struggles to get back on all fours. His pristine silver coat is now mixed with blood and dirt. When he is finally back on his paws, he bares his teeth at the bear, letting out a threatening snarl.
“NO!” you cry as the bear races towards the wolf.
You set the child down and jump to your feet, trying to do something, anything, to help Jisung stay alive. That is when you notice the glow on your wrist.
Hyunjin.
The brown wolf soars over your head right on time, knocking the mother bear off balance just as she is about to maul Jisung’s face. The bear is quick to get back on her feet, displaying her teeth for Hyunjin to see as the wolf steps between her and his fallen friend. Around his wrists glows a faint yellow, giving him a slight edge over what chance Jisung had. Still, can he win against a bear?
Your worries are soon put to rest when you hear more howling from a distance. Before long, the entirety of Mu Alpha Theta is by your side, backing the bear into a corner. Realizing that her chances have slimmed to zero, the mother bear lowers her head and turns back into the woods, leaving the cold body of her child behind. 
The first to speak after ensuring that she is gone is Seungmin. “We need to get Jisung medical care quick.”
“I’m fine,” he groans, earning a sharp glare from his frat brother.
“Get back into wolf form! Those injuries can kill a man!” Seungmin scolds. 
The boys load the silver canine onto Changbin’s back and begin leaving after you thanked them.
“Need a ride?” Chan offers.
You shake your head and walk towards the fallen cub. “I’ll stay with it for a little bit. Felix is calling the Humane Society from the house.”
Chan nods and raises a brow at Hyunjin. The taller male points at you, so the young leader bids you goodbye, leaving the two of you alone.
“Thanks for coming,” you say again as the remaining wolf kicks at a pebble.
He lets out a grunt with his hands in his pocket. You can tell something is off.
“H-how did you know?” you try.
Hyunjin lets out a sigh and turns sharply to face you, surprising you with his fierce gaze. He raises his soulmark and answers, “Because this started tingling. Tingling, Y/N. These are supposed to be on fire when our soulmates are in danger. I’m supposed to be drunk with power until you are safe. Do you know what this means, Y/N? Do you?”
You take a few steps back, scared by his sudden outburst.
“It means you’re dying. It means you’re going to look like that!” he finishes, pointing furiously at the cub when you don’t answer. “I mean, I already knew you were, but getting into a bear attack? Do you really want to leave that soon?”
“I’m sorry,” you squeak, unsure of what else you can say.
Hyunjin lets out another deep exhale and walks up to you, toes touching yours and taking both your wrists in his hands. “No, this isn’t your fault. I’m sorry for yelling. I just…” He turns his head towards the cub’s corpse, voice cracking as he speaks. “Looking at that makes reality so real. Too real…” He leans his forehead against yours. “And I realized that I can’t bear it. Please don’t leave, Y/N. Please. Not when I’ve… Not when I’ve finally fallen in love with you.”
The confession isn’t surprising. You two are soulmates afterall; everyone knew which way his heart would turn after his breakup. Despite this, your breath still gets caught in your throat and your body still turns rigid at his words.
“Hyunjin…” 
You don’t have to say anymore. He already knows that he’s why you’re leaving. He already knows that there is nothing that can be done about it. Well, perhaps not nothing.
He lifts his glassy eyes to look at you. His soulmate. The one above everything and everyone. But is there someone that’s an exception to “everyone”? Is his own daughter?
Hyunjin shakes his head, not believing such an idea-- the very one that he threatened Jisung against many moons ago-- passed through his head. He throws his arms around you and buries his head in your neck.
“I’m sorry,” he croaks. You can feel his tears rolling down your skin. Or is that tear yours?
Despite your better judgement and previous ideologies, you allow your arms to go around his waist. You tighten the grip you have on his shirt and close your eyes.
“I’ve told you to stop apologizing,” you whisper.
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Hyunjin wakes up in cold sweat and heavy breaths from a nightmare. He swallows with great effort as he recalls the vivid images.
You laid in his arms with blood trickling from your lips onto the forest floor.
“Hyun… Jin…” you croaked as you attempt in vain to lift your hand up to caress his face.
“N-no,” he whimpered. “N-no! Don’t go! Please don’t go!”
You shook your head, telling him to come to terms with your fate.
“Who did this to you? Tell me, who did this? I swear I will not let them see another day for doing this!” he cried while holding you tighter against himself.
“It’s…” Suddenly, the orbs of your eyes turned glassy and black. “... you.”
The orbs popped and dark liquid spilled out of them. You disintegrated out of his arms, leaving nothing but blood in your wake. 
Hyunjin fell to the ground, clutching at the leaves stained by your blood as he cried.
“Y/N, please come back! Please! I… I... I’m sorry! I’m sorry!… Please don’t leave me alone. I’ll do anything!”
“Anything?”
A cry sounded from under the leaves. Hyunjin gasped in surprise at the sudden noise but wasted no time pushing away the bloodied fronds to find its source. Finally, his hands rubbed against something soft. He lifted it up off the ground and let out a blood curdling scream.
Hyunjin wills his breathing to slow as he pushes his sweaty bangs out of his face. He walks over to his daughter and picks her up into his arms. She wakes up but is too tired to say anything as her father bounces her up and down gently.
He paces around his room with a heavy decision weighing down on him. He knows what he must do to save you, but can he? The stars against the moonless sky remind him that his time to decide is running out.
“Anything?” he repeats out loud. He doesn’t have to dig through leaves to find what the question means. It’s right there in his arms this time.
~ ad.gold
Posting schedule info: Part 12 (end) will be out Sunday, May 31 at 23:00 PDT! An extra will be out May 28 23:00 PDT. Two alternative epilogues will be out June 2 and 4. Additionally: NOW UNTIL JUNE 7 12:00 PDT please send in asks regarding anything!!! >:D Answers to be posted sometime that week along with all the other asks we’ve received thus far. Thank you for all your support! 
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andy-the-8th · 3 years
Text
Day Of and Day After - H.A.G.S! (Part 6)
Part 6 of Creatures That Defy Logic
Read on AO3
Have a great summer! XD
Sam and Jess and the last day of school, the day after the movie ends.
cw: bullying, homophobic language, sexism, general 90's bro unpleasantness
A/N: End of the Day Of and Day After storyline!
Jess, Sam, and Sean get a chance to interact on-screen without Cody
"But seriously, the whole summer? And he told you yesterday?"
Jen said this with an incredulity as if they hadn't talked it over on the phone last night several times. They were standing side by side in front of their lockers, fishing papers and books out, finishing packing up to leave for the end of the school year. Around them students were mostly moved out, a few groups still filtering around the hallways. Sam appreciated the sympathy but also didn't really want to talk about it anymore.
"Yeah I know, it sucks. Just don't keep talking about it though, I don't want to have to deal with -
"Heyyyy ladies" Sean had the worst damn timing. He'd come up behind them with a group of the swim team kids, all chatting around them. Jen rolled her eyes that they were all wearing their swim team jackets inside. It was June for godssake.
"Hey Sean." Jen looked him over, snapped her gum, crossed her arms, a pointedly unimpressed look on her face. Jen might have liked popular guys, but Sam had told her all about how much of a jerk this one was.
"Dude how are you so bad at talking to girls?" one of the other swim team boys quipped from behind Sean, leaning an arm on his shoulder. Sean smiled humorlessly, his eyes cold at Jen.
"Sorry I surprised you." His voice didn't sound sorry at all. Sam turned around, having finished emptying her locker. Jen leaned a bit in her direction, so they were facing Sean shoulder to shoulder. "Too bad about Griffin being gone, huh? Guess it'll just be you and me, all summer long."
The annoying blonde boy at Sean's shoulder raised his eyebrows and smiled lewdly at that. Jen flicked a balled-up bit of locker-detritus paper at him, popping him smartly on the nose.
"Hey!"
"Oops." Jen kept her voice deadpan and sarcastic, not taking her eyes off Sean.
"I already told you Sean, I'll be busy at with work."
"C'mon, every single day? Where are you working?"
"None of your business!"
"Hey Sam, d'you want a ride home?" Jen had pushed herself between Sean and Sam, gesturing pointedly with her eyes that she was giving Sam an out here. "My dad should be here any minute, we could drop you off or you could stay over."
Out of the corner of her eye, Sam heard someone noisily shuffling up from the opposite end of the hall. She quickly glanced over at the sound.
Of course this would happen right now.
Jess awkwardly made eye contact from down the hall, where he was busy transferring his sousaphone from the band room to the summer storage closet. She gave him a closed mouth smile and with her eyes loosely indicated "not now" to talk to her. She sorely hoped he got the hint, especially before Sean or one of the other swim team guys noticed him looking at them.
"Nah Jen, I'll be fine. My mom'll be here any minute."
"You sure?" Jen emphasized, making certain Sam knew that she was trying to get her away from Sean as soon as possible.
Sam glanced over her shoulder, hoping she wouldn't see Jess still struggling with the closet door. Of course, right then he tripped over his own feet, the sousaphone pulling him down and banging the tile with a dramatic clatter, his bag splitting open, books and papers splayed out across the floor to top it off.
Everyone in the group naturally turned to see what happened, immediately breaking into laughter and snickering once they all saw who it was.
"Hey, it's Griffin's pet nerd!"
"Can't even walk on land!" Jess could hear their various jeers even as he tried to get up, pinned down by the backpack straps on his heavy sousaphone case and slipping on some of the dropped papers that fell out of his backpack. In the back of his mind, he was strangely kind of happy(?) that apparently someone thought of him associated with Cody.
Even if it was just as "Griffin's pet nerd."
"Y'know if you guys want to be the cool kids, you could try coming up with better insults. Like really? Still with the "can't swim" joke? You've already used that at least twice" Jess was good at using sarcasm to defuse situations like this. Or at least, he liked to think so.
Sometimes bullies would just be weirded out by it and leave him alone. Sometimes they wouldn't.
Over the next several seconds Jess grimly pondered whether this newfound familiarity would make their bullying better or worse going forward, especially while Cody wasn't around. He figured he'd find out shortly.
Sean walked over, starting to bend almost as if he was going to help him pick things up, but Jess knew better  than to expect anything more than whatever demeaning comment Sean would come up with. He wasn't wrong.
"Are you seriously talking back to us right now?" he snorted, surprised and mocking.
Sean's voice was still joking but there was a definite menace behind his snickering.
"Well I'm not talking to myself, I save that for my own time, like any proper social outcast."
Sean's eyes widened, incredulous, amused, and increasingly pissed off. He leaned forward again.
"Careful with your tuba there, smartass. Looks like that thing is pretty heavy for ya." Jess had been carefully righting himself, finding his balance with the sousaphone on his back, when Sean pushed hard against the bell, knocking him on his back again.
Yeah, the bullying apparently would be getting worse.
The gaggle of onlooking swim team kids laughed again as Jess fell back, hitting his head as he went down. Jess clenched his teeth a bit with the pain, almost surprising himself with his next comment. He usually knew better to pipe down and just wait for it to be over once someone actually hit him.
"See? Making fun of the sousaphone again. As if I haven't gotten that one before."
Sean was pissed off now, his back to the group, staring viciously at Jess struggling to get up again. He dropped his voice and crouched toward Jess on the floor, his voice almost a growl, no longer interested in showing off to his friends.
"Well how about this then - you better stop fucking talking back to me like this before you get hurt alot worse. Faggot."
Jess did indeed freeze up then, no response to quip back. He was actually a bit confused. Despite being in junior high in the nineties, he hadn't gotten that one before. Guess he was pretty out of touch with whatever the new insults were these days. Wasn't even entirely sure what that one meant.
The moment was thankfully interrupted pretty quickly. Furious, Sam came striding over, hair pushed back behind her shoulders and her eyes glaring at Sean.
"What the hell is wrong with you Sean? Can't you just leave him alone?" She was standing between Jess and Sean now, clearly irate. Sean moved closer to her and Jess, but she brusquely pushed him back, him almost hitting the locker wall behind him. Jess was surprised at her showing so much force. As far as he knew, girls didn't usually fight.
Sean immediately changed his whole face, returning to his usual cocky facade, the hints of real danger evaporating quickly and unnervingly.
"Come on, I'm just chatting with my friend here about his interesting instrument, he happened to slip." As if on cue, Jess again failed to get up as one of the papers shifted out beneath him. The onlookers laughed again.
"Get lost, just leave him alone." Sam bent down to help Jess put his books back in a pile while Jess made another attempt to get up, having wriggled out of the shoulder straps of his sousaphone case.
Sean leaned cockily on the locker, watching them both. "You're hot when you're angry." He looked Sam up and down, leering.
"Hey! Don't you talk to her like tha-" Jess angrily pushed himself up but slipped again, and Sam gave him a quick warning look and shook her head, cutting him off. Jess took her lead and didn't try again.
Sam finished putting Jess's books back in a pile and then turned on Sean, disgust on her face. "Don't even talk to me, just get over yourself." She pushed past him, shoving her shoulder hard into his as she walked by. "Sean, leave him alone." She stared at him until he started to turn back to their group of friends at the other end of the hall. She could sound pretty scary in her own right.
Unfortunately, it didn't entirely work on Sean.
The swim team had started to disperse, no longer interested in whatever fight might have happened once Sam had intervened and taken the humor out of it. Sean lingered a bit, stopped before following her all the way back down the hall.
He then turned to Jess, his voice low, a mean grin on his face. "Griffin tolerated you to get his grades up but don't let that go to your head. Remember your place, faggot."
With the context clues, Jess was putting it together that this was apparently some significantly more potent insult than usual. Guess you have to be careful what you wish for, even if you meant it sarcastically.
"So did Griffin pay you to do his homework? There's no way that roid-ed up jerk could pass the class himself. Always needed to cheat somehow." Jess was about to retort something to that - there was no way this guy was going to insult Cody without Jess saying something, but Sean spoke again and cut off any reply -
"You know he never really liked you, right? He used to say it all the time at practice. How you'd just never shut up, never stopped being annoying. Guess he pretended to like you so you'd do his work for him. Or did he just agree to not let us kick your ass?"
At the last line Sean menacingly put his hand on Jess's shoulder, his other hand curling into a fist next to his waist.
Jess's face was red, anger welling up thickly in his throat to respond - how was it Sean had picked the most hurtful thing he could have possibly said right then? Jess's brain buzzed out with adrenaline - he knew it wasn't true, he knew Sean was lying, he knew he had to say something - he also knew he was probably about to get punched in the face.
He just hoped the hit wouldn't break his glasses (again). He was shocked when Sean then lurched forward, as if shoved away from Jess from the other side.
"Sean! Knock it off! We're leaving!" Sam was hovering there in the direction from which Sean was pushed, her face angrier than Jess had ever seen. Apparently some girls did fight.
Sean turned and saw that indeed the rest of the hall was empty. His audience gone and no longer needing to perform anything, Sean just scowled and turned away from Jess again. He huffed and righted his team jacket and stood up straight.
"Have a nice summer kid! Stay out of trouble!" he said cheerily, subtle menace behind the implication of what trouble he might be referring to.
He walked quickly past Sam catching up to the rest of the group. Jess was glad that he didn't emulate when she had hit him with her shoulder before - Sean was a jerk but at least he (probably) wouldn't hit a girl, or at least Jess hoped so. Sam followed him out the door with her eyes, fists still balled up, mouth in a tight line. Once the door clanged behind him and the last of the others, she turned back to Jess, her features softening. Jess could see the apology in her eyes, awkward as it might have been. He was grateful to her for stepping in, even if he didn't really like to think he needed her to.
He, of course, very much needed her to, at least if he didn't want to get beaten up one more time for good measure, just before the end of the year.
"I'm sorry about Sean. Ever since I told him Cody was away for the summer he has not stopped with the steroid jokes. Or stopped hitting on me in front of everyone. I'm sorry he was such an ass to you too."
Jess realized that Sam might not have seen that Sean had been about to hit him. He definitely wasn't about to say anything about it to her. Awkward, he smiled at her but shyly looked down again at his book pile before speaking.
"Thank you for distracting him - I'm pretty sure he would have beat me up if I got to say half the things I wanted to. Especially for the way he was talking about Cody."
He looked up at her, met her eyes as he said his name - like there was a kind of power to it now, a secret that was only really theirs to know. Whether Sam felt the same way about that or not was hard to tell. "I won't stand for them to insult him, or for that creep to treat you like that either, or -
"It's really OK Jess. I can take care of myself. But, y'know, thank you anyway." Sam smiled at him as well. She wasn't sure if Jess was trying to be chivalrous or something but either way she kind of wanted to move on from the subject. She still hadn't forgotten his weird kissing comment from the day before, and wasn't about to have him try to go all gentlemanly on her now.
"OK. Understood." Jess nodded awkwardly and went back to trying to get his instrument into the storage closet.
Sam was kind of surprised at how fiercely protective of Cody he was - and even moreso protective of her. From where she stood, the scrawny flustered boy getting up from the floor didn't seem to be in much of a position to protect anybody, least of all himself.
Sam hadn't really known much about Jess; along with not telling her about most anything for the last few weeks, Cody hadn't really said anything about his new frequent-companion either. She'd just assumed it was about tutoring so he could stay on the team. Jess mostly had his back to her as he hefted his sousaphone up off the ground, as if he was trying not to let her see his face. Mostly unsuccessfully. She saw his eyes were a bit wet as the redness in his face went down, heard him sniffle hurriedly before speaking again.
"I'll be fine if you want to catch up with those guys. I didn't want to overstep anything again, I just won't let people insult my fri- I mean, Cody and you."
That was almost too pathetic - Sam immediately felt a pang of sadness and pity that Jess didn't think he could call Cody his friend, at least in front of her. She didn't really know what their relationship was like, but clearly this kid needed a friend right now.
"It's OK Jess. We are your friends, I don't care what the rest of the team thinks." The words sounded weird coming out of her, especially since she didn't really know much about Jess at all. Still, secret merpeople were as a good a reason as any to bring people together.
Jess sniffed again, and turned his head back to her. "Thanks Sam. That means a lot." She hadn't heard what Sean had said to him. She didn't know how much he had needed to hear that from her, even if it didn't completely erase the anxieties Sean had stirred up.
Jess finally got the door to the storage closet open with a screech and a clang as it dragged against the tile floor and banged into the lockers on the wall. He hauled the sousaphone inside, struggled to swing the door back around as it scraped ear-piercingly against the tiles, and carefully closing it and dutifully putting in the combination lock. Sam stood awkwardly to the side, not sure exactly if she should try to help, so just settled on patiently watching.
The dedication to getting the lock right and the closet secured was kind of endearingly sincere and dramatic. Sam couldn't help but laugh a bit at the sheer magnitude of the effort to do all of this.
"What?" Jess looked embarrassed but not surprised. He was, of course, used to people laughing at him.
"It's nothing, it's just that you locked that thing up like it was Fort Knox, all dramatic with the padlock code." Sam quickly wanted to explain so as not to seem like she was insulting him.
"Hey, this is band program property! Mr. Payton trusted me to keep it safe!"
"Jess, literally no one is ever going to want to steal that thing. I think you're the only one in the school who has any interest in playing tuba" she said with a smile. She was trying to make it clear that her teasing wasn't intended to be cruel like Sean's.
Jess's mouth twisted to the side, what Sam was starting to register was his way of processing something or half-smiling. He was quiet for a moment, like he was deciding on something to say. Sam briefly worried if she'd insulted him again, but before she could say anything he seemed to find his confidence, properly smiled a little, and said "Sousaphone."
"Susan what?"
"It's actually a sousaphone!" Jess's expression immediately brightened, and Sam actually stepped back a bit, raising her eyebrows at seeing him open up again so suddenly. She could see that apparently getting to share facts about something was the magic ingredient to Jess becoming much more talkative. With this new gust of energy, Jess immediately was talking fast.
"So in some respects it is similar to a tuba, it's tuned the same and has similar valve technique, but the bore of the instrument wraps around your body so you can carry it more easily while walking and playing at the same time! This was named after John Philip Sousa, who wrote a lot of the famous patriotic marches you might hear from the marching bands or around the 4th of July! Tubas are notoriously had to walk around with, so this was invented to make it easier!"
Sam's face shifted halfway between being puzzled and smiling - she was not expecting the deluge of information. Was this what Cody had been living with the last few weeks?
"I thought you mostly were into marine biology? Or do you also just happen to know everything about music?"
Jess piped down a bit and again shyly averted his eyes, mouth twisting to one side again, taking pause at realizing that he'd opened the floodgates too quickly for someone he really only just met.
He already missed Cody even more.
"Only the sousaphone. Nerds don't really have friends; we have hobbies." Jess kept his tone matter-of-fact, same as he always had with everyone he'd recited his little mantra to.  "So you kind of get to know your interests pretty well when it's your main outlet for your day-to-day existence." Jess gestured to the now-closed door of the storage closet, then bent to pick up the pile of books and papers on the floor.
Sam paused again before speaking, awkward at trying to find a response to Jess's almost-proud declaration of not having friends. She was glad she had reassured him before that that was no longer the case.
"That's cool, thanks for telling me! I'd never really thought about it before." Jess looked back up at her and smiled again, much brighter than she'd seen before.
"If you ever have any other questions I'd be happy to answer them!"
"I mean I didn't really have questions, but y'know, still appreciate the information." Sam paused a bit again.
"Hey, uh, if you wanted to hang out sometime this summer, I'm going to be working up at the Brantwood Greenhouses starting two weeks from now."
"Greenhouses?"
"Yeah, all kinds of plants, we provide for most of the local florists and garden centers, I love taking care of them. I actually really like biology myself, though in more of a vegetables-and-flower-gardens way than in a fish-or-whatever way."
Jess looked up at her and beamed so wide he almost was glowing. "You like biology too?!"
Sam leaned back a bit again, smiling but also preparing for another spout of words going by the excitement in his voice, "Yeah, yeah, I do too! I just don't, uh, get as enthusiastic most of the time. Maybe like, just tone it down a couple octaves? Just like, keep it cool, y'know?"
"'Cool' is a little bit outside my skill zone, but I'll try!" As if to prove that point a snorkeling mask slipped out of his bag onto the ground with a rubbery splat.
They both broke out laughing at that. Jess bent to pick up the goggles and set them back in his bag. Sam looked at her watch, then back up at him. "I have to get going, my mom should be outside. Do you need a ride home?"
"No, thanks, but I just usually bike everywhere. We don't live far, just at the marina."
"OK. If you get a chance come by the greenhouse sometime next month! I'll be there on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays!"
Sam gave a small wave and turned on her heel, picked up her bag again, and strode quickly down the hall and out the double doors. The door clang echoed in the now-empty hallway.
Jess turned to go back the other way, to the other door with the bike racks. He was surprised to hear clacking footsteps coming around the corner behind him and turned.
"Jess, is everything alright?" It was Mrs. Nelson, his biology teacher, of all people. She was carrying a stack of manila folders, heading down toward the central office on the far end of the hall's intersecting segment.
"Yes ma'am, sorry for sticking around so late. I had to put my horn in the closet."
She smiled a bit. "OK then. Have a good summer! Great job on the marine biology project by the way - I know Cody really appreciated your help as well. You're a good friend."
Guess this was just a day of people happening to say weirdly poignant things to Jess Wheatley.
He smiled and shrugged. "Thanks Mrs. Nelson. I'll see you next year!"
She waved once again and continued on her way to the office.
Another day of a rollercoaster of emotions. From being very nearly beat up to getting (open-endedly at least) invited to hang out with a friend over the summer - quite a lot to process in the last few minutes.
Jess walked out the door on the other end of the hallway and strapped on his bike helmet. Carefully balancing his large backpack, he unchained his bike from the stand out front of the building. He turned once and gave a last look to the school, and pedaled off, ready to start the summer.
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chaeryybomb · 4 years
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JUNE COMEBACKS REVIEW
BLACKPINK: HOW YOU LIKE THAT
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ngl I’m kinda sad bc a lot of y’all don’t like the song ;-; but I can’t do anything about it since it’s your opinion so
but I hope that people know the difference between hating and giving criticism saying the song sucks and that it’s trash music is straight up music
I can get why people are disappointed with the song since everyone wanted almost the same thing, “jennie getting a rap part”, “jisoo saying blackpink in your area” and a high note from rosé
personally I really like the song, to me it’s not the same as dddd and ktl tbh I think it’s different
plus I kinda expected it to be like that bc their songs usually follow that yg style ya know the only songs I say that don’t follow that stereotypical yg style is “love scenario”, “stay” and AKMU’s songs
i mean if you compare the song with other yg artists song, they all have the same vibe to it because of the “yg style” we always say
the song also gives me nct and skz vibes too, like specifically “punch” and “side effects” bc of the heavy edm and also bc their songs has been called noise before dhshd
but enough of that
I really like how the song starts calmly in the beginning and then it starts to be more aggressive
also I like the fact that each of the girls get a chance to say “how you like that”
lisa’s rap????? y e s
personally I feel like this time it had more of a fairer distribution, including lines and center parts
like jisoo actually gets some center parts in the dance break and chorus
i also really like the outfits this era, especially the modernized hanboks! though I have mix feelings about the pink wig dhshdh
speaking of hair, jennie!! she fucking dyed her hair!!!
and rosé is no longer blonde dhsjdj
the parts I found weird is when rosé says “look up in the sky it’s a bird it’s a plane” i have no idea how that fits in the song so
and the “dumdudurum” part at the end, it sounds out of place, like especially after it the song ends
i also think that this is their best choreography! right next to don’t know what to do
overall, I really like the song, if you don’t it’s fine! hylt has the most aesthetic mv’s I’ve seen and the outfits are so much better and it has been said that BLACKPINK’s old stylist left the company in January no not maeng
lisa’s fur coat outfit reminds me of yeji’s outfit in wannabe
would I say that hylt is their best song? no, I think playing with fire was their best song but it’s not a terrible song either
another I like is jisoo owning this era, say what you want, hylt is Jisoo’s era period.
STRAY KIDS: GOD’S MENU
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what even is a concept anymore
we all thought it was going to be some street racer concept
buT NO
it’s a kung fu panda concept dhshdh
felix!!! my baby has lines !!!!
his demonic voice is bACK
hyunjin’s blond hair 😭😭
what the fUCK
the way he tied it up in a ponytail, like sir that is diSRESPECTFUL he really is jaebum’s son huh
okay okay on to the song
it honestly shocked me so much, like the rap parts were so aggressive like and the vocals are kinda angelic???
i really really like the pre-chorus, seungmin’s voice is just so !!!!! i also like seungmin+i.n’s little duet after felix’s part
spEAKING OF FELIX’S PART
“looking like a chef I’m a five star Michelin” bro that part is lowkey demonic looking in the dance
like mans pulled his knees up and put his hands through them while looking directly at you
does that not look demonic to you??? my friend said it reminded her of a spider dhshdhr
also the “dududu” part instantly reminded me of bp’s dddd dhshd like can someone edit a part of bp going “oh wait till I do when I hit you with that” and cuts to skz “DUDUDU”
the fact that no one has done it yet astounishes me
also what the fuck is that chain thing on Chan’s face, who put it there and why dhshd
bless whoever gave changbin dual contacts lens
AND WHO GAVE JEONGIN SLEEVELESS SHIRTS WHO ALLOWED THAT DHSHD
at first I found the choreography a bit funny bc they added like cooking gestures to it dhshd, like stirring the pot in the chorus but my favorite part of the dance is changbin’s part
the entire album was a bop okay, the fact that “god’s menu” wasn’t even the title track and they decided to change it, the fact that jyp has so much TRUST in bang chan also we get to see chan and sana being best friends uwu
“pacemaker” is literally “my pace” 2020 ver dhshd it even has the “nananana” part!
my favorites from the album is “TA”, “blueprint” and “haven”!!
also “easy”,,,, chan what did u do that it can’t be performed in shows
TWICE: MORE & MORE
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wow girl groups are really being criticized this month huh
if y’all don’t know what happened with twice, a lot of people are criticizing twice for not singing live during their encore stages
a lot of them are especially going after momo
I’ve watched their encore stages and I don’t know why people are saying they sound bad???? maybe they need a better vocal coach but the fact that people are taking advantages of the situation just to hate on them smh
a n y w a y s
the song definitely gives a whole lot of “dtna” vibes bc of the tropical concept, its like “dtna” but the mature version
if “dance the night away” had an older sister, it would be “more & more”
also I really like the eve & adam concept, “more & more” is also another “creepy”ish song that is hidden behind a catchy tune, like “yes or yes” where ppl think it’s a cute song but the lyrics says otherwise
okay actually writing this out, it’s mv has “dtna” vibe but the song is so much like “yes or yes”
if you read the lyrics, the girls are basically saying that “no matter how hard you try to hide, you’re going to be mine again”
even in dahyun’s rap she says “I’m naturally selfish, I’m sorry if you didn’t know” and “you will fall for me, you can’t say no no”
it’s almost the same as her part in “yes or yes” where she says “there is no letters n and o” dhshdh sorry this becam a whole theory
back the real song review, I’m so glad that momo got a dance break! I think that this is their fairest line distribution yet. jeongyeon got her lines, dubchaeng got their rap parts and momo has a lot of center parts!!
and the girls look so much happier during their promotions especially tzuyu! she was smiling so much, maybe it’s because mina is with them and I’m so happy they get to perform as nine again
i really like their choreography and the part where they do the chest bounce is really satisfying idk why dhsdh
plus jeongyeon got better outfits this era cough feel special era cough
overall, I really like this comeback and it’s nice that nayeon got the high notes this time instead of jihyo
IZ*ONE: SECRET STORY OF THE SWAN
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oh boy this is definitely my favorite song of this month
it’s so much different than their other songs!!!
and there’s so much to go on about!
wonyoung, minju, sakura and hyewon literally improved so much. im so proud of them !!!
hyewon, nako and sakua getting to sing the chorus??? y e s
chaeyena rap parts????? y e s
chaeyeon getting a dance break AND a high note???? Y E S
my favorite parts is eunbi+chaewon pre chorus wow I have a thing for pre choruses don’t I dhsh
i will say that this song vies the girls the chance to show how much they’ve improved throughout the eras, especially the j-line and visual line since a lot of people said they didn’t belong in izone
wonyoung and yujin's expressions are really on point as well
and yena's hip move dhshdhs
it's also rlly cute how eunbi throws confetti at her part dhshd
it’s refreshing to see how the girls improved
unfortunately, izone will be disbanding this year ;-; this is why I never liked the produce series
but we do have some ideas what will happen to the members though, we all know yena will be added into everglow, i having a feeling that eunbi and chaeyeon will be debuting as a soloist, they have so much potential plus the radiate chungha energy
nako, hitomi and sakura would most likely return to Japan, although I see sakura staying in korea to pursue an acting career and hitomi as a producer since she wrote some of izone’s songs
yuri might debut as a solo or debut in a new girl group as main vocalists, the same goes for chaewon
i see minju and hyewon going into acting careers and CF contracts, the same as kang mina, especially since minju is now an mc for music core
whereas for wonyoung and yujin, their both still young so I think they’ll finish school before re-debuting in groups plus yujin will be attending sopa
especially wonyoung, we all know that she’s actually really smart and is good at academics, i also think she might do modeling work, she fits the criteria
i also kinda see yujin pursuing an acting career because she will be in the theatre and film department in sopa. unless starship is going to debut a new girl group, I hope that yujin can debut as a soloist instead
WEKI MEKI: OOPSY
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*inhales*
LUCY AND LUA FINALLY GETTING THE LINES THEY D E S E R V E D
I’m so happy dhshdhhs
also lua fits the short hairstyle so much, I’ve literally fallen for her help I can’t get up
as much as I love yoojung, it’s nice to see lucy rapping
the song is very catchy, I especially like rina’s part in the second verse of the song
i also love the “wolf & hunter” concept for the album
like the pictures were very beautiful, I also like how they use white for the wolves and black for the hunters, it’s like painting the hunters at the bad guys and the wolves as the good guys
I am in love with Lucy, Lua and Sei’s “nonono” part in the chorus
and the choreography for the chorus too
as much as I love elly’s blue hair, she slays in black hair dhshd I
I really love their outftis this era, i like how it’s all pants for the girls too
my favorite outfits are the black outfits from the gif
overall, this is definitely their fairest line distribution cough tika taka and dazzle dazzle cough
NATURE: GIRLS
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this is my second favorite song of the month
I love the whole horror concept and I also like the fact that they released the uncensored version of the mv
it’s give the song much more of the horror vibe
I’m new to Nature and as far as I know, a member is stuck in China and another member sat out due to an injury. please correct me if I’m wrong
the outfits might be simple, but it fits so right with the song, I prefer the white dresses over the black ones
it kinda gives out the feeling that the girls are like asylum patients ya know, whereas the black dresses gives out that the girls are rich daughters that were sent away
I really like LU and Haru’s parts
the dance is also kinda a simple but it looks great!
overall, I hope that Nature will do this concept again, actually I hope to see more groups do this kind of concepts more
WAYV: TURN BACK TIME
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did this comeback scare me? yes yes it did
bro the teasers were so scARY
yangyang was literally laughing like a mANIAC
MANS WAS IN AN ASYLUM OKAY
their teasers gave me so much suicide squad vibes
also, why the fuck were 4/7 members not wearing shiRTS
sm do you have a shirt shortage??? I’m sure nctzens are more than happy to donate some shirts to you
okay anyways, I’ve always liked wayv’s sci-fi concept, I don’t know if the mv’s are connected or not but I think they are
“take off” is them basically flying away from earth and they landed in space in “moonwalk” and it seems they have been captured in “turn back time”
very inch resting dhshd
listen, I may be chinese but I can’t understand 70% of the song because of how fast it goES
so with that saying, yANGYANG DID NOT COME TO PLAY
his rap was amazing !!!! he is definitely one of sm’s best rappers along with taeyong and mark
my favorite part is lucas and hendery’s rap parts and then it switches to xiaojun and yangyang + kun, ten and xiaojun getting highnotes
the dance break is so satisfying to watch too
“stop, rewind, turn back time” and “5432” part is so satisfying
also I’m really impressed with how fast LabelV responded when fans pointed out that some of the outfits had offensive phrases in them, they took the time to edit it out of the teasers and the mv, cheers to them
also! i find it funny that wayv released the Korean version of “turn back time” but all of us were much more shocked at the fact that Ten got another cat dhshd
SEVENTEEN: LEFT & RIGHT
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first of all, dokyeom looks so gOOD IN THE MV
second of all, vernon and wonwoo’s “hana dul set” will forever be iconic
third, seungcheol is back 😭😭
just like twice, they get to perform as 13 again dhsjdsn
AND THEY LOOK SO HAPPY DURING THIS ERA TOO
LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN WONWOO?? HE’S SUCH A SMILEY BABY with his orange mic dhshd
also if y’all don’t have tiktok, svt has been doing the “left & right” with so many other idols including chungha and apink’s naeun!
haha joshua hong and wen junhui being real disrespectful with those sleeveless shirts
bonus point we got svt x nct china line + mark and joshua interaction at music bank
their choreography looks so fun too dhshd
the entire comeback is so cute and colorful
my favorite parts are vernon and seungcheol’s rap parts
also vernon be rocking that greaser style
their new album is so versatile, like, “fearless”, “left & right”, “kidult” and “my my”?? who’s doing it like seventeen
i love their new songs so much especially “kidult”
overall, I really really love this comeback
WJSN: BUTTERFLY
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I couldn’t find a group scene gif pls forgive me
let me say, I am absolutely in love with the concept, the outfit concept for this is so creative, I don’t know if any other groups have done it before but !!
their outfits evovle like a butterfly!!
at first, the outfits were plain pastel colours but they slowly become more detailed and colourful throughout the stages, like a caterpillar to a butterfly!
center yeoreum!!!
and dayoung looks so pretty in short hair 🥺
and again, as far as I know, the Chinese members are in China, two of them are apart of the Chinese group Rocket Girl and I think Chengxiao recently returned to Korea
I really like their ending pose where their hands are in the butterfly gesture and the “wings” are slowly flapping
and how their arms represent their wings during the chorus
by far one of the moor creative comebacks in my opinion
also, it’s nice to hear soobin doing the high note instead of yeonjung, let yeonjung rest her voice once in a while ya know
SUNMI: PPORAPPIPAM
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THE QUEEN IS BACKKK
also wonder girls reunion uwu
the teaser gave me so much "barbie: island princess" vibes so the entire mv was not what I expected
at all
the mv literally describes sunmi a lot, she basically does whatever the fuck she wants like when she posted that pic of jyp on instagram dhshdhs
it’s so funny especially the scene where sunmi is wearing the teletubbies head
and at the end when she wakes up and goes back to sleep is just a mood lmao
something about the song really gives me a lot of “siren” vibes but happier???
i really like the way she pronounces “pporappipam” it took me one week to finally pronounced it dhshd
idk why but I really like the instrumental, especially the intro, it’s very melancholic
also she wears converse while performing the song bc she has to step on the dancers at one part !!
speaking of that part, it’s so cool!!! the way she climbs up the dancers like stairs and then she just trust-falls into their arms
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mashihosoftboi · 4 years
Text
Joining Stray Kids and Meeting Chan
June 2017
               Mashiho was dancing, which wasn’t uncommon for the Japanese boy, in one of the practice rooms in the JYP building. Of course, he was surrounded by many other trainees while they waited for their choreography teacher to come in and show them a new dance they had to memorize before the monthly evaluation coming up, but he was good at pretending he was alone. He got so focused sometimes that he wouldn’t even notice if anyone new walked in or cut off his music.
Luckily that didn’t happen this time when the teacher came in because the first thing he did when he walked through the door was look around the room until his eyes settled on Mashiho and started walking towards him with a weird look on his face. Mashiho’s eyes got wide and out of instinct backed up a bit, not sure why his teacher looked like he was about to combust from…. joy?
Yep. That was a smile.
               Wait, was he being finally being kicked out? Did the company finally realize that after 4 years, he wasn’t worth all the trouble, that he hadn’t improved as much as they had wanted? Was the choreographer THAT happy that he was leaving? Mashiho thought they had a pretty decent relationship but maybe he wasn’t as nice as he thought it was towards his teachers here.
               “Mashiho-ssi! JYP would like to talk to you about debuting!” Oh wow, that was not what he thought was going to come out of his mouth.
               “Uh, really? Right now?” Mashiho was shocked. And a little uncomfortable with the public declaration. The other trainees had taken to staring, some with jealousy, at him. He was never really close with any of them so he didn’t expect anyone to start crying tears of joy for him, but he hoped they would be nice enough to say congratulations or even smile at him. At least his teacher seemed happy for him.
“Yes, right now. You are dismissed from practice” And with that he grabbed his practice bag, water bottle, phone and left the room, feeling the trainees’ eyes linger on him as he closed the door.
 Coming up to the door with the big Park Jin-Young on it, Mashiho heard some mumbling. He gave three hesitant knocks and took a step back. A few seconds later, there was a loud ‘Come in’ and a phone being hung up. He entered slowly without having opened the door the whole way, looked around the office before his eyes landed on JYP himself and he quickly bowed, just missing hitting his head on the door handle that was in front of him.  JYP chuckled, semi-bowed back and gestured for Mashiho to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk. He set his bag down by the chair and sat down.
“Mashiho-ssi, I’m just going to get straight to the point. Do you know Bang Chan-ssi?”
“Not personally, no” He had seen him around, heard great things about him and knew he was close friends with many of the seonbaenims in and out of the company. He was also very social with other trainees which was not Mashiho’s strong point, so he usually stayed away, hid on the side, as he did with everyone else in the company, trainee or otherwise.
JYP didn’t seem to care what his response was. He seemed eager to get his point across. “Well, I assume you know that I’m going to let him choose and debut a group soon, right?” He had definitely heard that fact. It was all everyone was talking about. Some trainees, with whom Chan had never spoken to, speculated that they would be the next member added to what would be JYP’s first male Korean pop group since 2014. Everyone thought they were intitled to debut and when they found out that a certain trainee had been added, they started speaking badly about them.
“Yes, sir”
He should have expected what came out of JYP’s mouth next and yet it shook him to his core.
“My point is that Chan and I have discussed, and I want you to join his group”
Mashiho felt his mouth fall open but he couldn’t bring himself to close it.
“Anyways, he will be here any minute to help you out since you will be moving into a new dorm with the other trainees he picked out” Just as he finished his words, there was a loud knock at the door.
“That would be him” JYP got up, walked towards the door and motioned for him to do the same. He opened it to reveal a visibly happy Bang Chan standing on the other side. He quickly dismissed them and was quick to close the door in their faces.
Mashiho was quick to bow and mutter a ‘hello seonbaenim’, too anxious to look anywhere but at his shoes. Chan just smiled, bowed back with his own greeting, and proceeded to grab his hand and lead him down the hallway. He let himself be pulled and just stared at their connected hands. They weren’t tangled, more just hooked together like the hook latch on his, now previous, dorm’s front door.
He wasn’t uncomfortable with the hand holding, he even felt comforted but was unfamiliar with the feeling since it had been years since someone had held it at all. He couldn’t even remember a time where someone had ever held his hand with anything but malicious and hateful intentions.
Once stopped at the elevator, Chan pressed the down arrow and waited. Mashiho finally looked up from where their hands were still attached and cleared his throat.
“Where are we going, seonbaenim?” He saw Chan’s eyes go wide for a brief second before he giggled. Why was he so happy today?
“Oh! I am so sorry. I totally just kidnapped you!” he laughed briefly. “I’m taking you to your old dorm so we can get all your stuff, so that you can move in with us today.” His eyes lit up. “Also, just call me ‘Hyung’ please. We are going to debut together after all!”
“Okay, hyung. Who is ‘we’ anyways?” He had forgot how many of the trainees had already been chosen for this new group, he just knew it was more than a couple of them. The elevator doors opened, and they stepped inside, Chan pressing the ‘Lobby” button.
“Currently, It’s just me, Han Jisung, Seo Changbin, Yang Jeongin, Kim Woojin and Hwang Hyunjin. Do you know any of them?” They were already 6, 7 with him. This was going to be a big group if he wasn’t done recruiting.
He knew of Jisung and Changbin; they were in a rap group with Chan, popular with the female, and surprisingly some of the male trainees. He had heard of Kim Woojin, a great singer and former SM Entertainment trainee who had almost debuted with the K-pop group NCT, who had debuted almost a year ago. Maybe he had heard some of the female trainees talk about how handsome he was while passing them in the company hallways? He had no clue who this Yang Jeongin was but to be fair, he didn’t know any of them, not even Chan.
Since joining JYP Ent. In 2013, Mashiho had made approximately zero friends and that was not an exaggeration. No one wanted to be friends with a short kid from japan who was generally quiet and liked to dance alone. Though, he was partly to blame for his lack of friends since he didn’t try to approach people and kept a blank face whenever he wasn’t dancing. He just wasn’t very open and didn’t see the need to play nice when he probably was never going to be friends with these people or speak to them again.
 “Uhm, not really. I’ve heard of most of them, I think, but I haven’t spoken to them”
“It’s okay! They are very welcoming, so I’m sure they will be nice” He didn’t seem too sure about that last part. Mashiho would just have to wait and find out.
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Text
The Story (Sanders' Sides Human AU)
Ft. Platonic Moxiety, trans Roman, Imaginality (Remus x Patton), and Emciet (Janus x Emile)
Tw: suicide, homophobia, implied abuse, transphobia, f*g said, tra**y said, bullying, anorexia
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Patton stared at his phone. He had a shift at the office in a few minutes, but he couldn't..... He didn't quite know what he couldn't do today, but he couldn't do it. He called in sick. Emile was very understanding. "Take as long as you need, Pat," he said. "Your mental health comes first."
"Thanks, Dr. Picani." He hung up and continued to stare at the message on his phone.
Unknown Number
Got ur number from Jan. How u doing?
It was him. After all these years, it was really him. And, paired with the fact that it was only a week till his brother's birthday.... The last two years of high school came rushing back.
Patton's phone chimed.
Ro's birthday is coming up.
Like Patton didn't compulsively write down the date in his calender every year. June 4. They would have been twenty-six.
I'm moving to ur area 4 work. I finally caught up 2 u.
Patton stared at his phone without really seeing the messages. Tears started to bluer his vision. He wiped them away, only for them to return with a vengeance. Finally, Patton just let himself sob, hoping to get everything out by the time Virgil got home.
***
Virgil waved to his friends as he walked to his front door. His dad's car was in the driveway, which was a surprise. Normally, he wouldn't be back until dinner. He slowly opened the door. "Dad," he asked. Patton gave Virgil a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Hey, kiddo! How was school?"
"Okay. How are you doing? Are you sick?"
"No, no, I'm fine. Just taking a mental health day. Sit down! I made popcorn. We can watch Black Cauldron."
Virgil sighed and sat down, leaning on Patton. Patton put part of his blanket around the teen and pulled him closer. He loved his son more than anything. He would not let Virgil go through the same things he did.
***
Just as Virgil was about to go to sleep, someone knocked on his door. "Come in," he called. Patton opened the door and gave him another fake smile. He sat down on the chair beside Virgil's desk.
"Can I tell you a story," Patton asked.
"I'm a little old for bedtime stories."
"Please? It's kinda boring, but.... I'll be quick. Please?" Virgil stared at his dad. He hated the desperate look in hs eyes. It was getting closer to June, which meant he'd grow quiet and a bit withdrawn. Maybe this was to preemptively make up for it?
"Sure." Virgil laid down and looked up at Patton.
"Thanks, Virge," he said with a slightly more real, relieved smile. "Let me tell you a story about six boys growing up in Florida."
***
Logan Crofters, Roman and Remus Ryan, Janus Pine, Emile Picani, and Patton Hart. They had been best friends since kindergarten. They were all inseparable. Things got worse in middle school when Roman came out as trans. His parents refused to let him transition or cut his hair, and the other kids were less than supportive. Remus let him wear his clothes, though, and his friends all defended him when they could. And they all survived until high school.
Fast foreward to sophmore year. Logan was on the fast track to becoming valedictorian. The other kids, in addition to whispering, "Fag," and, "Tranny," at them all in the halls, taunted Logan for his intelligence. Remus and Janus got into fights often to protect the others. Patton and Emile tried to keep the group's moral up. Logan and Roman always took it all harder than the others, but they had one teacher, Mr. Sanders, who let them eat lunch in his classroom and used Roman's proper pronouns. He even congratulated Patton and Remus when they started dating. He'd always pair up Janus and Emile for group projects, just to watch them flirt.
Patton, Roman, and Remus's parents passed around a petition to get him fired the next year. It was successful. That was the year everything fell apart.
Roman and Logan couldn't handle the pressure that came with the grades and the bullying. They always said they were fine, but....
One day, Logan quit his job at the library. Said it just wasn't worth it anymore. Roman stopped eating and always brushed his friends off when they begged him to try.
They died the same night. June 4, Roman's birthday. Roman overdosed on antidepressants. Janus, Remus, Emile, and Patton read his note over and over again.
Dear Friends,
I want to start by saying this isn't your fault. Remus, you were the most amazing, supportive brother anyone could ask for. Patton, Janus, Emile, Logan, you are all wonderful and perfect, and you all deserve the world. But.... I can't do this anymore. I can't live in this body one more day or hear someone call me Rachel one more time. I just can't do it. I love you all so much. Please don't dwell on this for too long. I want you all to be happy, okay?
Mom, Dad, I'm sorry I couldn't be everything you wanted me to be. I wish I could have been as good a son as Remus was. I wish you could have loved me as much as he did.
And, Mr. Sanders, if you ever see this.... Thank you. For everything.
Adeiu, best of friends and best of men,
Roman
Logan hung himself. He didn't leave a note. His parents at least gave him a funeral. Roman's parents didn't care enough to even do that.
Luckily, Remus, Janus, Emile, and Patton had saved enough from their various jobs to have him cremated. Emile's parents insisted on helping out, which helped a lot.
The group burried Roman's urn just outside the cemetery where Logan rested. Luckily, his grave was at the edge of the gate so Roman's could be near his. Remus painted a large rock to use as a marker. They all stood by the small grave, Janus holding Emile and Patton and Remus squeezing each other's hands, until the sun rose.
Patton stayed with Remus after Janus and Emile left.
"I can't stay here anymore," Remus had whispered. "I can't stay with the people who killed my brother."
"I know," Patton whispered. "I hate our parents." He brushed back his bangs to show Remus a black eye and a bruised cheek. "If we save enough, we'll run away together," he promised. "We'll get Janus and Emile, and we'll all go to Massachusetts, and we'll get married." Remus nodded.
"I like that." He gently pulled Patton close, and they shared a long, sweet kiss.
Things didn't work out. Senior year was worse. Janus, Emile, Patton, and Remus were the gays who were friends with the two who killed themselves, and that's all anyone ever treated them as. Janus's parents took him and moved to Delaware. He and Emile stayed in touch for a few months before the lost contact. Janus and Patton still talked occasionally, though, even after high school. Emile, Patton, and Remus stuck together, but things would never be the same.
When senior year ended, Patton and Emile prepared to move to Massachusetts, but Remus wouldn't go.
"Please," Patton begged. "We found a cute apartment in Salem. We can start over. We can get jobs while Emile is at school. We can build our own lives. Please come with us." Remus shook his head.
"I can't," he said. "It's only been a year since they died. I just can't leave them yet." Patton hugged him tightly.
"Keep in touch," he asked. Remus nodded and pressed a kiss to his lips.
Over the next few years, Patton kept in touch with Remus. Every year, he said he would finally move in with him, and every year, he had an excuse not to. Eventually, they stopped talking as much, and when Patton changed his number, he forgot to tell Remus.
***
"He and Emile stayed together, though," Patton finished. "Patton became Emile's receptionist when he started practicing independently."
"What about Janus and Remus," Virgil asked.
"Janus is still in Delaware, and I guess Remus is with him." Virgil nodded. He wasn't an idiot. He knew Patton had just told him his life story. He just wasn't going to press any further than that. Maybe someday, Patton would tell him more, but it was almost the day his friends killed themselves. Patton needed time.
***
The next day, Patton went back to work. Larry and Dot were happy to see him. When their appointment was almost over, another patient entered the waiting room and walked up to Patton's desk. "Hey," he said, head tilted down. His voice was low and familiar.
"Hi! Do you have an appointment?"
"N-no. I just moved here and was hoping I could set one up."
"Okay.... Dr. Picani is with a patient right now, but-- Remus?" Remus was staring at Patton, a sad frown accepting his dull eyes. "L-like I was saying, Emile--"
"Why didn't you answer my texts?" Patton began to fiddle with a pen. "You could have just said you didn't want to see me. I get it. I probably remind you of Ro and Logan, and that's fine. I failed you and I put off moving even though I said I would, and I understand that you're mad, and it's okay. But--"
"I wanted to see you." Remus stared at Patton, who stared right back.
"What?"
"I wanted to see you, but I couldn't say it. It's just so close to Roman's birthday, and I didn't know what to do or what to tell my son--"
"You have a son?" Patton nodded, tears in his eyes.
"I adopted him five years ago. His name is Virgil. He's funny, he's dark, and strange and sarcastic, and I love him more than anything."
"Boyfriend or husband?"
"Single dad and rockin' it." Remus laughed despite the tears that were escaping his eyes. Patton laughed with him, also crying. "I'm sorry. For everything," he sobbed. Remus took his hand.
"Me too." And that's how Larry and Dot found them five minutes later.
Holding hands and crying, together again.
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Just read a post about cops and the shit these crazy, power hungry beasts do, and I want to share a few stories of my own experiences (I would ask you to keep in mind that I am white, and that I recognize how my white privilege kept me from having far, far worse experiences.) But, here we go:
Scene: my family, consisting of me, my mom, my grandmother, and my infant baby sister, is in our car. It’s an old, busted up vehicle that we got on an incredible bargain of $400, because the dealer was sympathetic to what we had going on in our lives at the time. It was winter, the sun was nearly fully set, and it was snowing heavily. We were driving home from checking out a house for rent nearby, which was a bust, because it wasn’t one we would be able to afford anyway. We were about 6 blocks from our house.
Flash of red and blue and a siren. We pulled over. A male cop approached the driver’s window where my grandmother was, and asked her why we thought he had pulled us over. My grandma played dumb and said she had no idea. We all figured it was because our plates were expired, and yeah, that was part of it.
He tells us that we drove too slow a few roads back, and that he suspected my grandma of being intoxicated. She remained completely polite, but told him that there was a very large, visible patch of ice in the road, and that we had already been approaching a red light. She had her two grandchildren in the car, and would rather be safe than sorry. Michigan winters are nasty, after all, especially when it comes to the roads. He accepted that answer. Then, he brought up the expired plates.
And so, my grandma gave him the short rundown:
“Officer, my family lost our home to a house fire, and we’ve just spent more than what we had relocating to our only option, which we still can’t afford. I had to choose between getting the plates renewed and feeding my daughter and her kids, and I made my choice. I’ve been driving as little as I can, and I plan to keep doing so until I can renew my plates.”
And he listened. He heard what she said. But he still didn’t care.
Cop: “Well, I’m sorry, but your vehicle is going to be towed.”
Grandma: “Ok. But we’re only six blocks from our home. Can we get back to our house, and then you can tow the car from there?”
My baby sister began to stir, and the cop looked when he heard her. My little sister is biracial, but she looks fully black. The officer, and I’m not even fucking joking a little bit here, laughs after seeing her, and says, “Well, it would just be a shame if you had to walk out in this cold with the little one.” He was fucking dripping sarcasm.
He had our car towed from where it was. He could have called another cop to drive us back to our home, but instead, he specifically made my grandma and my BABY SISTER stand in the snow, by the road, while he took my mom and I home first. We had no choice in what order he drove us. That man was such a fucking pig, I’m legitimately surprised he didn’t just make us all walk. My baby sister cried all night, and my mom struggled to warm her back up. We spent about a month without any form of transportation, until my grandmother found a dealer with some empathy who could give us another old, banged up car we still couldn’t afford.
Our plates were two months overdue.
Scene: My mother, my cousin and I, are on our way to a birthday party. I’m seven. My cousin is six.
My mom is intoxicated, very much so. She’s an alcoholic, but my cousin and I are too young to know that. She crashes the car.
There are no serious injuries, and no other vehicle is involved. My cousin and I cried like babies, but more out of fear than anything else. He bit his tongue, I bit my lip, or maybe it was the other way around. Either way, we were both bleeding from the mouth, not severely, but enough to frighten us even more.
A cop pulls over beside the car after I’m not sure how long. He is absolutely livid, red in the face. My mom is arrested for driving while intoxicated. The cops calls for backup to handle my cousin and I, but he does not wait for the other officer to arrive. He leaves with my mother in his car, and does not inform my cousin and I of what is happening, or that anyone will be coming for us. We are alone in a wrecked vehicle for nearly an hour before the other officer arrives. He gives a reason as to why he took so long, I don’t remember it. Neither of us know our other relatives phone numbers, we only know 911. The first officer took my mother’s phone along with her. It’s another two hours before we’re left in the custody of my aunt. 
Scene: It’s early summer, just the beginning of June, 6 months or so before the first incident on this list. My family is using a rented U-Haul to move most of our furniture, and I have a friend over for my first official sleepover in the house. He helps us move, and for the brief few minutes he isn’t assisting me in lugging furniture into the house, he takes my dogs out into the yard for a small walk. While he’s out, a guy our age (16/17) happens to walk by on the street. He must not read social cues very well, because he stops and tries to talk to my family and I, while we’re moving a wooden dresser down the ramp of the U-Haul. 
At one point, he gets out a pocket knife. I should make it clear that he wasn’t a genuine threat to any of us, he was just very, very talkative, and apparently very proud of the big ass knife he had just been given by his grandfather. He swung it around and made some jokes about being a ninja or whatever, and one of my dogs freaked out and made a mad dash at him. My friend, who we’ll call G, hadn’t been prepared to hold a full grown boxer back with one hand gripping the leash, and my dog pulled free and bit the dude’s leg. She didn’t break the skin, and the guy, who we’ll call D, was fine. He said he grew up with large dogs and had been beaten up much worse, and he promptly left without any trouble. This will become important later.
Skip ahead about an hour, and it’s on the verge of starting to get dark. Most of the stuff is in the house, and we’re done moving in for the night. My mom has just been paid for the week, but we haven’t gone grocery shopping yet, so there isn’t much to eat in the house. G has just gotten his level 2 driving permit, and he offers to take me and run down the street to get McDonald’s for everybody. My grandma is passed out on the couch, exhausted, and my mom is taking care of my fussing little sister. Although it’s illegal for G to drive without an adult in the car, my mom simply tells us that we should be fine; it’s just down the street, and as long as we’re safe and follow the road laws, we shouldn’t have any sort of trouble.
She gives us her credit card, takes her weed out of the car (a just-in-case measure that, looking back, was invaluable) and we go. G drives steadily, and I keep an extra eye on his speed the whole time just to be sure of it. We were both really nervous at first.
We get to the McDonald’s. We order food for ourselves and my family. We head back home. The sky is orange and bright, a small detail that will also have a decent level of importance later.
I live in a sort of community, it’s difficult to navigate and pretty large. G had a better understanding of how to get back to my house than I did, and this was his first time visiting. We were both worried about getting lost, but we figured if we did, park security (who are NOT officers) could help us. Just as we pulled into the entrance of the place, we see D from earlier, waving us down. G and I shared a look, before he pulled over. D didn’t even get to speak before we noticed red and blue lights behind us, which means now we were pulled over in both senses. 
The cop had not even seen D until he looked through our car windows and noticed him on the other side of the vehicle. He swore upon seeing him and berated him for not putting his hands up and announcing himself as soon as the cop pulled us over. D, G, and I are all white. The cop tells us he pulled us over because our headlights weren’t on, and it was too dark for that. Again, the sky was bright orange, and the road and everything alongside it was easily visible.
G had turned 16 about a month ago, and was still getting used to it.
Cop: “How old are you?”
G: “I’m fifteen.”
Cop: “What?? Get out of the car, now. Hands where I can see them!”
Me: “He’s sixteen! He just turned sixteen! He mispoke!”
The officer demands that G show ID, while cuffing him. G tells him his permit is in the cupholder in his wallet. The cop accuses him of lying. I have my hands up where they can be seen, and I tell the officer that his wallet is right there, in plain sight. I don’t move my hands. I ask if the officer wants me to give him the wallet. He screams at me in absolute rage to keep my hands where he can see them, though I still haven’t moved. I complied, for a moment, and then announced, twice, because he acted like he couldn’t hear me 
Me: “I’m reaching for my phone, it’s on the dashboard, I’m going to call the owner of this car.”
Cop: “It’s not your car?! This is a stolen vehicle?!”
Me: “No! This is my grandma’s car, we have her permission to drive it! We live in this neighborhood and I’m calling her to come speak to you!”
He pushes G, cuffed, forward, despite not walking forward himself, and then yells at him to stop moving and drags him back, slams him up against the car. I should mention that G, although male, is only about 5′9, and very thin. No muscle on him whatsoever.
At this point, I’m on the phone with my mother. My grandma didn’t pick up. I’m very shakily telling her what’s going on, and she tells me to just wait one moment, she’ll get my grandma up and have her come get us in the U-Haul.
The cop moves G into his vehicle, and D is still standing by my window, muttering variations of the word ‘yikes’.
I get off the phone with my mom, and loudly announce that I’m stepping out of the vehicle and approaching the cop’s car. It was difficult to raise my voice to a yell that he could hear from in his car, but I did, and I kept my hands up. I approached his window, and told him my grandma was on her way. I asked him if he would prefer I stay in my grandma’s car, if I were to just stand where he could see me, or if he would want to cuff me and keep me in his vehicle, too. As much of a snarky smartmouth as I can be, this was all said completely respectfully. My hands stayed up.
The officer told me to, quote, “Get any important shit out of the car and walk home.”
Me: “I’ve just moved here, and I don’t know how to get home. I want to wait here until my grandma arrives. It will just be a minute.”
Cop: “I told you to go. Walk.”
D, from near our car : “I can take you home, and help you carry the food!”
Cop: “You heard him. Go.”
Me: “I don’t know him, and I don’t feel safe walking somewhere I don’t know with a strange guy, can I please just-”
Cop: “I told you to fucking leave, that’s an order! Go! Fucking Go!”
At this point I was near tears, and I looked past the cop at G, who was nodding at me to leave.
When I did as the cop said and I got everything out of the car, he screamed at me again, and drew his gun. I explained that I was just doing what he told me to. He put the gun away.
On the walk back to the house, D took an extended path (which I only know now that I’ve lived in this neighborhood a while) and told me several explicit stories along the way. He made ‘jokes’ about raping me, and, I’m not even fucking kidding, forced me to wear his hoodie. I get that that doesn’t sound sinister, but he made me put everything down, took my phone, took the hoodie I was ALREADY WEARING, and made me put his on. I was fucking terrified, but I couldn’t say no because he had my phone, and he had a knife. I was fucking scared the whole time because for all I knew, he wasn’t even taking me home. He knew this place like the back of his hand, and I had no idea where I was or where I could even run to. For the rest of the 20 minute walk, he continuously made jokes about forcing himself on me, and I had nowhere to go.
When I made it back to my house safe and got my hoodie and phone back, he tried convincing me to let him stay and eat the food we’d gotten. My mom didn’t know any of what he’d said along the way home, but she made him leave. It was about 45 minutes from then until my grandma came back with G. The officer towed the car.
G had a breakdown and called his family, but he stayed the night still. He told me later that (important detail: G is gay, and, although I feel bad saying it, very noticeably so. He fits a lot of stereotypes, ie he has a lisp, dresses semi-nicely, and is somewhat flamboyant) the cop had called him a fag, had called him a dirty queer, had told him that his body cam was off, and that if something happened to him, no one would ever be able to prove it. The cop even had the fucking gall to chat over his radio about the ‘fag’ he’d picked up.
The cop threatened to have G put in jail overnight, or until his father would come to get him. All of this in the ten minutes it took for my grandma to get there.
These are all off the top of my head. I, a white teenager, have never once met a ‘good cop’. These encounters are mild compared to the absolute horror stories about police that I’ve heard. All of these ended up with all of us safe, and all of us living, but they very easily could have gone sour. My heart goes out to anybody with similar or worse experiences, because even though these were small, they were still absolutely fucking terrifying to experience. I can’t imagine what it must feel like to go through worse. Fuck cops. Fuck all of them, because even a ‘good cop’ aka a cop who does the bare minimum (their job) either enables other’s to behave this way, or isn’t even a cop, because they were fired for not letting it slide. ACAB.
Stay safe, everyone, and I’m sorry.
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jmeddows2 · 4 years
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You (Roger Taylor x fem!Reader)
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This is my Halloqueen gift for @mezzomercury​ Happy belated Halloween! I’m so sorry I couldn’t make it on time,but here it is. I’m really nervous about it ARGHH  @dtfrogertaylor​ Summary: Reader is an opera singer, with a chaotic manager with just the right contacts in the industry  Warnings: only a bit of swearing, else we have Fred and Reader become best friends, fluff Word count: 2k+ Notes: sorry for mistakes, english is not my first language Roger is single and childless in this story! The Duck House really exists and Queen used to stay there quite frequently when recording in Montreux :)
You were supposed to get a real job with a purpose, regarding the field you were actually educated in, but Steve, your manager had quite the reputation. Especially in terms of missing dates and mixing things up, making him the chaotic mess of a man that he naturally was. As an opera singer, that’s just started out, you struggled with auditions. Steve’s lack of time management was rather poor, that sometimes he wouldn’t tell you about the most important auditions in time, or miss most of them, because they just weren’t on his radar. If it wasn’t for all the contacts in the industry Steve apparently had, you would have run for the hills ages ago. One day, when Steve waltzed into the office to your meeting, which of course he was again late to, he was restless, jumping from one foot to the other. "I have it. This is going to be IT for you.” He explained it as a project. To 'expand’ your horizon, to fill your CV with something, that would make your future opportunities skyrocket from 0 to 100. .....to stand in for the band Queen as a background singer (in case of use)...... living, food and drinks provided.... is what the contract read ...should not be opposed to beer and fun. Must be flexible and be available to fly out during the time period of recording from June 1981 - March 1982. Place: Montreux, Switzerland. The few black letters on white seemed to get even more ridiculous throughout the over 100 page contract. But also funny. Mainly ridiculous though. Being crammed up in a recording studio in Montreux, Switzerland as an "option of use” wasn’t exactly your idea of a job. Or at least not what you were aiming for at the moment. The numbers with a 5 digit payment that crested the contracts last page, made you rethink the whole deal though, much to Steve’s joy. So you agreed. Your first encounter with Freddie, Brian, John and Roger was weird. Well, not with Freddie, Brian and John. They were all kind and excited to get to know you better. Roger was another thing. He didn’t even look at you or recognize you when you all gathered in one of the temporary Queen offices, to go over all the details. He was too distracted reading through the schedule for the upcoming months. It felt more like he pretended to be interested in the schedule on his lap, while absentmindedly toying with the pen between his fingers. You later found out, that he was dealing with the aftermaths of a really ugly breakup. Montreux, Switzerland You arrived at Geneva airport on a cold January morning, approximately 7 months after your first encounter with the band. Your personal driver was already awaiting you with a sign that read your name in capital letters. He had a wide grin plastered on his face. The exclusivity didn‘t stop there though. The one hour ride from the airport straight to the recording studio in the black limousine felt more like 10 minutes. A bottle of champagne, a few snacks and the heated leather seats in the car that made you feel oh so comfortable, may have been the reason why time passed so quickly. The nervous feeling crept back into your mind, as soon as the driver dropped you off in front of the casino, in which the recording studio was located.  The recording studio was situated in the basement. As you pushed the door open, there was only a friendly security guard in the foyer, checking your ID.  "Hi love, are you lost?“ It was Roger. His hair was a bit shorter than the last time you‘d seen him. "Oh hi, no actually, I‘m supposed to be here. As a background singer“ The uncertain tone in your voice made it sound more like a question. "uhh, I received a call to come out here. We had a meeting a few months ago“ Roger looked confused, but not bothered by your presence at all. "Well, be my guest then“ he awkwardly shook your hand and gestured for you to make you feel comfortable. "Where are you from uhm?“ "Micaela. Born and raised in New York City“ “A NYC girl?  pretty sure you’ve got some stories to tell” he teased.  “I’m sure not nearly as many as you” You got right back at him. That was something Roger highly valued. The wit, someone who’s not afraid to speak up. He smiled to himself and soon after Fred, Brian and John entered the studio as well. They each greeted you warmly.  Freddie was very excited to have you on board. When he wasn’t busy recording, as a fellow opera enthusiast, him and you always found something to talk about. Or it was rather having Freddie listen to all the stories you had in store, even if it was just a few. It almost felt like telling bed time stories to a child, seeing his dark, beautiful eyes light up, even at the slightest mention of words like ‘stage’, ‘orchestra’, ‘costumes’ or ‘opera’ in general. "I’m going to be honest with you, darling” Freddie said, as he took a seat beside you on the couch, while Roger was banging his drums frustratingly to the already finished guitar and bass backing track of ‘Las Parablas de Amor’ in the recording booth.  "We don’t actually need your beautiful vocals here” Freddie patted your thigh gently.  "You’re kidding, right? Why am I here then?” "I thought you may enjoy a little holiday out here. You know, there’s great spa resorts around town. And you could do some small assistant work, nothing hard or bad, I promise! No, I promise on Montserrat Caballé, so you really know I’m not joking” he swore. Well, you couldn’t say no now.
Out of nowhere there was a loud crash. You turned around to see Roger tossing his drum sticks across the room, nearly hitting John in the head. Roger continued to throw casette tapes around, that were properly lined up on the shelf nearby. “I’m done with this. It sounds like a cheap piece of crap.” he stormed out of the room. The boys only looked at each other, as if they were communicating through their minds on who’s turn it was now to go after Roger. "I’ll go” you volunteered, seeing as no one else made a move and what could you possibly have to lose? Except for a huge amount of payment. Ok, maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but the other boys looked quite relieved when you got up from your seat. You prepared for the worst,  grabbing your coat from the hanger on the door on the way out. It was really cold outside. Roger wasn’t hard to find. He was just outside the building, a cigarette hanging from his lips and rubbing his hands up and down his arms. He certainly wasn’t clever enough to bring a jacket with him, after his dramatic, oscar worthy departure. "Hey” how exactly do you approach an angry person you don’t know, but find really attractive? "Did they send you out here?” a chuckled groan left his lips.   “No, I came out here on my own. Want to talk about it?” you suggested. He offered you a cigarette, but you declined. 
"Talk about what? about the crap we’ve been recording lately? It’s disco.” he grimaced a pained face. “It sounds like the music they play in gay clubs. I mean don’t get me wrong, I support everyone’s sexuallity, but not everyone’s taste in music! I’m just not made for Disco music. It’s a load of bollocks. God, now I’m just venting” he threw the cigarette on the ground, putting it out with his boots. "I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m actually an opera singer. Not really Rock 'N Roll, is it? Yet I’m here in a recording studio with one of the biggest rock bands.” "Ok you have a point. Why did you agree to do this anyway?” he was shivering, while lighting another cigarette. "Sometimes you make sacrifices for the sake of others, but only as long as you’re feeling comfortable in your own skin ”  "God,I hate that you’re right.” he sighed, unable to hold the pout anymore, that was was replaced by a smile forming on his lips. "Now let’s better get back inside before you freeze to death” you gestured for the door. "Just a minute” he grabbed you gently by the arm. "Thank you” Roger hugged you tightly, nuzzling his face into your neck. The feeling of his cold cheeks in contact with your warm skin made you jump a bit.  “ Now let’s go and make some disco music” he laughed, grabbing your hand.  Expecting another fight and argument by Roger, Brian, Freddie and John were surprised to experiece as calm as he ever was. Stil, you decided to put the recording on hold for the day and locate back to the house, in which you all stayed. "Welcome to Duckingham Palace” when entering the house, you quickly noticed why Roger called it like that. There were hundreds of wooden duck statues situated all around the house. They were evrywhere, quite creepy, but as time passed, they became pretty much invisble to you. Believe it or not.
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You all had gathered around the living room with a hot drink in hand, when John lit the fireplace, creating a cosy atmosphere. It felt like you’d known Freddie, Brian, John and Roger since forever, as you seemed to pretty much share the same or at least similiar interests and humor. "Ok now Micaela. Tell me. What’s your favorite Queen album?” John asked curiously while pouring a generous amount of rum into his hot chocolate. "Easy” Freddie answered for you. “Has to be A Day At The Races” you nodded in response. "See? we’re besties already, you guys better step your game up” Freddie threw his arm around your shoulders.  Roger couldn’t stop giving you little looks while having a conversation with Brian, who as expected also wasn’t a fan of the new direction in music they were headed at. “ how did you tame the lion, darling?” Freddie chuckled into your ear. " you know..How did you get Roger to calm down so fast? I know how he can get when he’s in a mood” "The cold outside did the job actually” you tried to sound nonchalantly.
"Of course yeah, that’s also why he’s been eyeing you up, ever since we left the studio. Did something happen?” Freddie kept pressing, but in a playful way.  "He never gives in so easily. Usually not even to pretty girls like you when he’s mad” Your only answer was a light blush of cheeks. At 2 am, John was the last one to go to sleep. Roger and you literally had to drag him up to his room. He was so plastered, that he didn’t even recognize his own song on the radio. Roger and you decided to sip on one last ‘good night drink’ to reward yourselves for all the hard work of tucking John into bed like a little baby. There was a silence upon you, but it wasn’t awkward at all, just relaxing. "Thank you again for today” Roger broke the silence. "Nothing worth thanking me for” "It is actually. Y'know I’m glad you’re here. You’re going to make this much more bearable for me" you snorted out with laughter, not realizing how serious he was about the words he said. "I’m being honest, love! I really fancy you and I want to get to know you better.” he was so close to you now, you could feel his warmth. "the seaside promenade is really beautiful, almost as beautiful as you.” Roger brought his hand to your hair, to brush a few strands behind your ear. "So, it’s a date then” you nervously drew a circles with your fingertips on the surface of the wooden kitchen counter, while looking into his ocean eyes. "Yeah it’s a date” he smiled at you. You both took your last swigs of your drinks.    "Good night Roger” you hugged him tightly and gave him little peck on the cheek, before wandering off to bed, thinking of all the beautiful scenarios the following day would have to offer. Roger followed closely behind, entering his own bedroom. The feeling of your kiss on Roger’s cheek lingered with him, until he fell asleep, thinking of his newly found happiness. You.
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britesparc · 4 years
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Weekend Top Ten #432
Top Ten Games to Remaster
As we continue June’s videogame-themed series of Tops Ten – during what would normally have been E3, but is still something of a prolonged Videogame Announcement Season – I turn my attention once again to great games past. This has been exacerbated by the release of Command & Conquer Remastered Collection, a hi-def spit-and-polish re-do of two of the greatest PC games of the nineties. I have very fond teenage memories of both C&C and its pseudo-sequel, but Red Alert in particular strikes an important chord as one of “the” games that deepened and broadened by love of gaming as an art form. In the way that really only happens when you’re a kid, I absorbed Red Alert, not just completing the campaign and playing hours and hours of skirmish, but also talking about it extensively with friends, designing my own levels, and even going so far as to modify the source files to create my own super-units (nuclear tanks ahoy!). As such, it utterly delights me to declare that C&C Remastered is a phenomenal undertaking, the graphics painstakingly remade to fit modern displays, the interface masterfully tweaked to appease modern sensibilities. But at the same time it offers so many pleasing, knowing, considerate hat-tips to fans, such as a re-imagining of the classic DOS installation prompts. All in all, it’s a must-buy, bringing a 25-year-old series of games more-or-less bang up to date and preserving their legacy for a new generation.
Anyway, all this got me thinking of other classic games, and how it’s so difficult to play them nowadays. Maybe they’re mired in rights issues. Maybe it’s a technological minefield to get them to run on modern systems. Maybe elements of modern gaming – be it graphics or design – have simply passed them by, making them a far more difficult and frustrating experience than they would have seemed Back in the Day. Whatever the reason, these are games that – like classic films from the 40s and 50s – should be celebrated and enjoyed by the young’uns, not left to gather digital dust on forgotten floppies the world over.
So, with no further ado, here are ten games that I would love to see given a bit of digital TLC, renewed and revigorated for the ultra-wide monitors and liquid-cooled systems of tomorrow. In most cases these are just one game that I’d like to see spruced up and re-released, but there are a few “collections” here too, whether it’s a C&C-style pairing of a great double act, or a  celebration of a series, a la Halo: The Master Chief Collection.
Oh, and I’m on about remasters here: not a full-on remake or reboot. Stuff like Perfect Dark on the Xbox 360, not Doom 2016. Old games made good on modern hardware, not a reimagining of the property.
Regardless: have at it, games industry.
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Lemmings (1991) and Lemmings 2: The Tribes (1993): I definitely think they should be a double-pack, because whilst the first is a well-regarded classic, the second refines the formula, makes it more user-friendly, offers skirmish-style training modes, and amps up the comedy. But they’re both ancient by now, and despite mobile do-overs in recent years, the originals are very difficult to play. Upping the resolution whilst still keeping the character of the scantily-pixelated sprites would be difficult, but it’d be worth it to once again sample one of the gods of gaming.
Sam & Max Hit the Road (1993): other LucasArts classic adventures have had a spruce – most notably the first two seminal Monkey Island games – but it’d be good to see this cult comedy classic come back to life. I don’t know if the backgrounds ever existed in higher resolution, but I’d love to see the sprites re-drawn to more closely resemble a cartoon version of Steve Purcell’s artwork.
The Jedi Knight Series (1995-2003): I’m bundling all four Jedi Knight games in together – that’s the original Dark Forces, plus Jedi Knight, Jedi Outcast, and Jedi Academy – but let’s be honest, it’s the first two we’re really after. DF gave us a compelling mission-based “Doom Clone” (back when Doom was a genre), and one which would be amazing to see tarted up to 4K with texture filtering a-go-go; but it was its 1997 sequel, Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II, that struck serious beskar. Huge, expansive levels, in “true 3D” (as we used to call it), full-motion video cutscenes, finally getting a lightsaber and Force powers, but most of all the Light/Dark Side dynamic offering (very basic) morality and a branching storyline. Again, giving it a glossy hi-def sheen would do wonders to preserve the legacy of one of the greatest Star Wars games of all time.
The Quake Collection (1996-2005): really it should be called The Quake Qollection, no? Encompassing all four mainline Quakes. Although, again, let’s be honest: there’s something deeply iconic about the first three, so no one would complain if we just forgot about part 4, yeah? Anyway: Quake was a stunner, a gorgeous 3D technical juggernaut, offering sumptuous lighting effects and gorgeous architecture. Part II came a year later and offered us coloured lighting and a coherent sci-fi story, whereas Quake III Arena in 1999 gave us a sublimely crafted multiplayer shooter and a character that was an eyeball doing a handstand. Despite being graphical powerhouses in their day, getting them to run can be a drag, so it’d be lovely to see them dragged into the 21st Century, especially if they could offer us ray-tracing on next-gen consoles, a la Quake II RTX.
Tomb Raider (1996): we’ve seen the series rebooted in (generally) excellent fashion, but at the same time it feels it lost a little of the majesty, mythos, and merriment of OG Lara. One of the first truly successful 3D games, it was like nothing before it. A subtle update to increase its resolution, filter the rough edges, maybe offer the option to move beyond the rigid grid-based movement structure, and possibly up the poly count so blocky Lara more closely resembles her rendered box-art cousin, would be terrific. Imagine the dinosaur in 4K…!
Descent (1994): one of those games that’s slipped from public consciousness, this was a full-3D shooter a couple of years before Quake shambled onto our screens. Piloting a craft in zero gravity, it offered full freedom of movement as well as a tense shooter dynamic coupled with some mild, X-Wing-style space sim elements. It was funky, fast, gorgeous, and messed with your head. I’d love a remake that kept the levels as-is, simplified the often-complex controls for modern sensibilities, and just in general made it look prettier. I worry that a contemporary “re-imagining” might lose too many of its crazy rough edges, though.
Syndicate (1993): there have been a number of efforts to re-do Syndicate over the years, but apart from its excellent sequel Syndicate Wars in 1996, none have matched the dark joys of the original. rather than try to go all modern and 3D, I’d rather see the artwork redone, redrawn at a higher resolution, perhaps offering subtle 3D touches such as dynamic light, shadow, and ray-tracing. The fiddlier aspects (getting into cars?!) could be tidied up, but the look and feel should remain the same. I honestly think this could be a big deal.
Total Annihilation (1997): if C&C can get remastered, why not the game that was arguably the first real challenger to its sci-fi RTS dominance? TA had 3D graphics, a new and refined model of base construction, and tactical touches such as line-of-sight and elevated terrain. But the comparatively low resolution of late-nineties machines meant that the robotic units could often appear slightly indistinct, turning into a grey melange; boosting the res and the poly count would do wonders, but – like C&C – the gameplay itself should be kept as authentic as possible.
Warcraft I & II (1994-95): I know, I know; they just did a remaster of Warcraft III that wasn’t well received and got everybody’s backs up. But I barely played Warcraft III (I barely played Warcraft I for that matter). Warcraft II: Tides of Darkness was the fantasy yin to C&C’s sci-fi yang, and it was great; clear, bright, fast, fun. The cartoony graphics were gorgeous and the units had bags of character (reinforced by the humorous soundbites when you kept clicking on them). I’d want to see the sprites re-drawn in hi-res, with the units given some gorgeous new animations to match their character. Other than that? Keep it broadly the same. It worked 25 years ago, it’ll work now.
Fantasy World Dizzy (1989): I nearly didn’t have a game this old on the list. For one thing, I thought pre-16-bit games would require far more retooling for modern audiences, becoming essentially the sort of reboot I said I wanted to avoid; I can’t imagine a new Skool Daze being too similar to its original. Also which Dizzy do you choose? The one I played the most was probably Spellbound (1991). But I think Fantasy World may be the most iconic. Its Amiga port was almost a remaster anyway, giving it gorgeous colour graphics. A modern version would up the resolution with all-new art assets, obviously, and perhaps could offer a more user-friendly jumping dynamic (and maybe – maybe – I’ll allow scrolling). This could be a lovely way to re-introduce audiences to the character of Dizzy, who should really be held up more as a British gaming mascot, without having to go all-in on a brand new title. Egg-cellent (sorry).
So there we are. There are a couple missing here, obviously; Simon the Sorcerer was nearly there until I realised they did do a gentle remaster in 2018. The Settlers would have made the list, except they are remaking that, although in my opinion it looks like a full-on reboot rather than the upgraded version of the original that I crave. Fade to Black just dropped off the bottom on the grounds that I barely played it in its original form, but a third-person 3D Flashback is still on my Most Wanted list (Flashback itself, sadly, has already had a disappointing remake). And the best Star Wars game of all time, Knights of the Old Republic, I decided not to include as – again – I think we’re going to see that reimagined and folded into the new official Disney canon in some form. Maybe that should preclude me imagining the original game in 4K with updated character models, dynamic shadows, and ray-tracing, but – hey – that’s just me. At least that is one game that I’ll still be able to play fairly easily on an Xbox Series X, even without whistles and bells. Here’s to dead old games!
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Text
No Distractions
Characters: Rock Star!Dean Winchester x Reader, minor characters
Word Count: 1,459
Warnings: none
Summary: With Dean being so busy with his career, he loses sight of what’s really important--and who.
Squared Filled: Vegas // Rock Star!Dean
Author’s Note: I know some of you have requested fics, and I promise I will get to them. I just need to finish these bingos before the deadline in June/July of this year. I am also trying to post daily again so bear with me. This is for @spngenrebingo and @spnaubingo and this is unbeta’d and any and all mistakes are all on me.
Feedback the glue that holds my writing together
Tags at the bottom
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Pre-school: his tiny hands would bang on any surface that he could reach, making as much noise as possible. Much to the daycare teacher’s displeasure, he would be in his own little world, slapping his hands on all kinds of surfaces because he loved the different kind of noises it made.
Third grade: to pass the time in class, he would take two number 2 pencils and drum them against the desk, causing a distraction for the whole class. The teacher would get mad at him, but you’d watch in amazement that he could make music just by two orange pencils. The kids around him seemed to be more interested in him than the teacher which is why she threatened to send him to the front office if he didn’t put them away.
Seventh grade: by this time, his parents had given up and bought him a small drum kit, one that wasn’t very good, but was still able to keep him occupied. He’d be at the drum set every day after school, and you would be there next to him, doing your homework as you listened to the music he’d create from scratch. It was amazing how long he’d kept up this hobby, and he’d talked to you about making this his career one day. With just enough practice, he might get there.
Eleventh grade: he had joined high school band to play the drums for the first year, but it didn’t seem to click in his mind. He wanted to play more rock than what they were going for which is why he was interested in music class. They offered all kinds of instruments, and he was the first to grab the drums once he laid eyes on a real drum set. Playing acoustic guitar was something you picked up on over the years, and that instrument was yours. To be honest, you just took the class to watch him play.
Junior year of college: right from the start of college, he had found some friends to form a band that would play around the school, maybe participated in a few low-key gigs that paid pretty well for an up and coming starter band. You had been his supporter all throughout his life, and you weren't going to stop now. At this rate, he would become a rock and roll drummer, famous all around the world. Seeing him progress through his career is something that gave you joy because he was your best friend, and you would do anything you could to see him succeed.
Present day: Dean had been offered by many recording companies if he and his band would produce music, which, of course, he said yes. It was hard to pick only one, but you might have had something to do with that. While he wanted to be a musician, you have always wanted to be a producer, and you pulled some strings to get him the producer he wanted: you.
It was a dream come true to see him live it out on stage, playing for thousands of people only to rack it up to millions. From the start of preschool, he had wanted nothing more than to be a drummer, and now he’s gotten it, you weren't going to do anything to tear that away from him. He’s played on stages from all around the world, and at each event, you were backstage to watch him play.
The only downfall to this was the more popular he became, the less time you got to be alone with him. It was always play here, sign this, appear there. His happiness was your number one priority, but sometimes you wished you were back in his mom’s basement, watching him play on the shitty drum kit his mom gave him.
His latest gig, the one he scored in Vegas, he wanted you to be there for the opening night. There was no way you could say no to him, so you made sure to take the first flight you could to be there on time before they even got started setting up to see if you could score some alone time with him.
When you got there, that dream was crushed to a million pieces once you saw him surrounded by fans. He looked so happy to be signing their papers and taking pictures, and he looked so breathtakingly gorgeous, you decided to stay out of it until he was done. When he finally finished, it was time to get set up on stage.
The concert had been a hit, and afterward, there would be a small party at one of the casinos to celebrate the success of it all. He made sure you were coming to that, and it wasn’t like you were going to miss it. Maybe you might get in some alone time to tell him how you truly felt. It broke your heart that your best friend was being taken from you by the rest of the world, and you needed to tell him how you felt now before it was too late.
While at the casino, the whole band got together to have a few drinks before they all went on their separate ways to do their own thing. You found Dean huddled with a group of girl fans as they giggled away to try and impress him. Sighing, you took a seat at one of the games, frowning as you put in a twenty.
“Ladies, you can all get your pictures. Don’t worry,” Dean smiled as they giggled. They were pretty and nice and all that, but he really wanted to be spending time with only one person: his best friend.
“You did so well on that stage,” one woman fawned.
“Yeah, you really know what you’re doing there,” another smirked. Something told him to look away from the girls, to pay attention to what was in front of him. He looked up to see you trying your luck at one of the slots, with a sad frown on your face.
“Ladies, would you excuse me one minute?” he said as he gently pushed them to the side. He walked to you and took a seat at the other slots next to yours. “Hey, you okay?”
“No, Dean, I’m not okay,” you gathered the money you won and got up, leaving his side to be on your own. It broke your heart to treat him this way, but you really missed your best friend. He watched as you walked off to the VIP section and took a seat, taking out your phone to absentmindedly play on it.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked once he reached you.
“Don’t you have fans to take pictures with? Sign some things?” you asked, not looking at him.
“Y/N talk to me,” he sighed. The VIP section was empty which boosted your confidence a little bit.
“I fucking miss you, Dean. Do you know how long it has been since the two of us hung out?”
“We did before the show.”
“I meant alone, Dean. Don’t you miss the days where it was you and me, your drum set, and nothing else? Don’t get me wrong, I am so fucking proud of you for making it this far. I just… I miss you,” you sighed sadly.
“I guess I got caught up with everything, that I lost sight of who was truly by my side through it all. I’m so sorry.”
“And I better say this now because I don’t know when I might get another chance, but I love you. Like, romantically. I didn’t want to live my life without telling you that just in case you might feel the same way as I do.”
“Alright, here goes. For the past few weeks, I have been thinking about you romantically. You have always been there for as long as I can remember, never once giving up hope on my dreams. People said that what I wanted was a foolish dream, that I should think about something practical, but you never gave up on me. I hate that it took me this long to realize it, but I do love you,” he smiled, “romantically.”
“We should make a pact,” you stated, grabbing his hand. “We will spend one day a week where it’s just me and you, no distractions. If we’re going to make this work, we need to be there for one another. I don’t want to mess this up before it’s even starting.”
“I like that pact,” he grinned, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and pulling you in. At that moment, the other people in the room didn’t matter. You had Dean and he had you. Just like it has always been.
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emhpathy · 5 years
Text
Begin Again Ch.2 (m)
Jaehyun x Reader smut, angst, fluff
word count: 2,542
warning: swearing
x
After you texted Jaehyun, you made something to eat, took a relaxing shower and went straight to bed, cuddling your dog until you fell asleep. The next morning you woke up an hour before your usual time and couldn't fall asleep again.
You unlock your phone and see a new message from Jaehyun
[New message from Jaehyun]: “Yeah, it's fine by me too. Sorry I didn't text you back last night, I was exhausted and fell asleep as soon as I got home,” you are typing a reply when you get a new notification
[New message from Jaehyun]: “Are you up yet? We could meet to grab a coffee and talk a little, maybe?” You weren't expecting that so soon but get excited anyways, “I know we barely talked but I'm kind of old fashioned and I like to talk in person lol.” Cute.
[New message to Jaehyun]: “Hi! I'm up and don't worry about last night, it happens to me all the time lol Coffee sounds great! Just send me the address and I'll see you in a bit?”
He texts you the adress, turns out that the coffee shop was near the bakery where you worked, which was great and could save you some time.
You take a quick shower and put on your clothes. A jeans overall, a plain black t-shirt and your snickers. You have never been a fan of heavy make up, you hated wasting more time than necessary in the morning and definetely did not like the sensation of having tons of different products on your face, so you just apply a thin layer of mascara and head out to the coffee shop. On your way there you remember to text Luna
[New message to Luna]: “wake upppppppppp. i'm omw to grab a coffee with Jaehyun. maybe i'm expecting too much but whatever. he seems nice and made the first move (:” you hit send and giggle to yourself. You know Luna will be pissed because Jungwoo haven't took the first step yet, neither did she. They both liked each other but were too shy to admit it.
You get at your destination first, finding a couple sitting at the corner of the small store and two people waiting in line. Since it was too early in the morning and the coffee shop was still empty, you pick a table and decide to sit close to the door. You don't know Jaehyun’s preferences and don’t want to seem rude drinking and eating before him, so you choose to wait. You take your phone out of your purse and see that you have 4 new messages from Luna and 1 from Jaehyun. You read his first.
[New message from Jaehyun]: “Hey, I'm sorry I'm late, I'm on my way. One of my roommates was not feeling well and I had to help him”
[New message to Jaehyun]: “No problem. I walked here and the place is near home, so don't worry, you're not late. And hey, there's only me and a couple sitting here, so it shouldn't be hard to find me lol,” you text him and open Luna's chat
[New message from Luna]: “wHAT”
[New message from Luna]: “i’m kinda jealous tho”
[New message from Luna]: “anyway GOOD LUCK ALEJDKSLSLDJ”
[New message from Luna]: “Jaehyun looks >>>really<<< good and he is very sweet,” you both overreacted a little bit at times, so you choose to believe Jaehyun was just a normal guy and Luna was being, well, Luna, “he has this cute bread face and the cutest dimp–“
“Y/N?”
You slowly look up and your eyes widen in shock
What the fuck.
You see the personification of an angel in front of you. Jaehyun is beautiful. He is wearing a striped purple flannel and black jeans. His chestnut hair is styled down and makes him look like a teenager. Your eyes grow big at his striking features and how his tongue pokes out to wet his lower lip.
You must've spent a lot of time looking at him, cause you hear him calling your name again
“Y/N, are you okay?” The owner of the deep voice asks, making you snap out of your trance
“Y-yes! Hi! Sit down!” you gesture to him, a little embarrassed
“I’m sorry I'm late, I had to make sure my roommate was alright before leaving” he apologizes and you just nod, not completely out of your astonishment
“S-sure, don't worry about it, I've been here for a couple of minutes, so you're fine! But is your roommate okay?”
“Yeah, he is, thanks for asking. He got wasted last night and wasn't feeling well,” he half smiles and a fucking dimple appears on his cheek. “But tell me about you, we literally know nothing about each other other than our names.”
“Yeah, you're right! Well, I work at a – wait, we haven't ordered yet,” you realize and ask him what he wants
“A medium iced Americano, please” he smiles briefly and you walk to the cashier ordering an Americano for him, a capuccino for yourself, and two chocolate cookies. You wait for your name to be called and text Luna in the mean time
[New message to Luna]: “YOU COW, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT JAEHYUN IS A GOD? HOW DARE YOU?” You text her and remember you didn’t finish reading her last message. She actually mentioned his dimples and how sweet he was, but she also said that he doesn't open up easily, which intrigued you. You were about to ask her why when the barista calls your name. You lock your phone and put it into your pocket. You thank the guy and go back to your table.
Jaehyun is messing with his phone and you put his coffee and the cookies in front of him
“Thank you, Y/N, I should pay you back,” he takes his wallet out of his pocket
“No! It's on me, don't worry,” you tell him, he nods and thanks you
Jaehyun told you he is an elementary teacher, which surprised you, but he explained that he has a niece that he adores, and she made him want to work with kids. Also, he said that he's turning 25 in a few days but wasn’t going to celebrate it because he isn’t a party person anymore. He also mentioned his roommates, Johnny and Jungwoo. They've met at college and have been living together since then. Other than that he didn't mention much about his personal life. You didn't want to pressure him, this was your first proper conversation, he didn't have to tell you everything about him.
“So, now tell me about you,” Jaehyun says and drink his coffee
“Well, my name is Y/N Y/L/N, I'm 22 years old, I work at a bakert. By the way, you should stop by some day, it's just a few blocks from here,” you suggest
“Sure, that sounds cool! How long do you work there?” he asks and you start to feel melancholic
“Well, I have always loved cakes, that shouldn't be a surprise cause who doesn't?!” you joke and laugh, Jaehyun laughs too and nods, agreeing with you, “so when I was younger, my grandpa taught me my first recipe,” you start talking and glance at Jaehyun. He looks adorable. His bangs are spread all over his forehead, his hair look really soft.
You've noticed that everytime he was focused paying attention, his mouth stayed slightly opened and he nodded unknowingly. He was attentive, you liked that about him.
“So thanks to him I started taking baking classes. After a year I decided that I wanted to work work with it and tried to find a job related to it. It wasn't easy, I was young, inexperienced and honestly didn't have anything to offer, but I wanted to learn. So one day I met June.” Jaehyun notices that you started bitting your bottom lip and avoiding eye contact
The thing about being an elementary teacher is that they deal with different kids everyday, so they are aware of the fact that every kid reacts to a situation differently. Some of Jaehyun students had the habit of fidgeting with their legs when they were nervous, others, with their hands. One of the girls had the habit of curling the strands of her hair when she was overthinking. One of the guys couldn't look at Jaehyun's face when he was lying. Jaehyun payed attention to all of that and he noticed when you started to get uncomfortable talking about June.
“Y/N, you don't have to talk about–” he starts talking but you interrupt, “No, don't worry, I wanna talk. It's just, I haven't talked about this in a while but it's okay” you tell him.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am,” you assure him. “I lost my grandma when I was a baby, so I don't have memories of her other than pictures and some stories that my granpa told me, so June was kind of my grandma figure” you gaze at Jaehyun and feel that he's actually listening to you, not just hearing, “she was my first boss, she had taught me everything I know now.” You remember how difficult it was to convince June that you were willing to learn what she had to teach you. At first, you helped her with anything she needed in exchange of her teaching you about baking and confections. After a year and a couple months, and a lot of pleads, June had let you put your first cake at the bakery's display. You still remember how you felt when she told you that you had sold your first cake
“June told me her secrets, how to treat the customers properly and she gave me a lot of advices that I will carry with me forever,” Jaehyun was smiling sweetly at you. “She treated me like her granddaughter. But she nagged a lot at me too,” you two laugh and you carry on, “but everything I know now is thanks to her.”
“What happened to her?” Jaehyun questions
“She passed away a couple of years ago.” You see Jaehyun's eyes widen
“Oh, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked,” he apologizes
“It's okay,” you smile, “It was a difficult time but she always said that I should be a strong woman and learn how to deal with shit life throws at me, losing a loved one being one of them” you lock eyes with Jaehyun and he nods
“But anyway. June didn't have any inheritor, so she left the bakery to me,” Jaehyun seems surprised, and to be honest, so did you when you found out that you were the owner of the place that you loved so much
“Really?!”
“Yes, really. I don't like to say that I'm the owner of the place because June started everything, she started from the bottom, so I really don't feel like I own it. Legally, yes, but it's only because of her,” you explain to him. “I only told you this because you are cute and a good listener,” you flirt a little and you could see his dimples showing on his cheeks
“I’m glad you feel comfortable enough around me to tell me about it”, he says and smiles, allowing you to see for the first time the crinkles on his face. They make him seem adorable
“I think my story took longer than I expected,” you joke, “but I should go. I need to open the bakery and I don't want you to get late either” he agrees and you two get out of your seats, heading to the door.
“I'm glad we talked today, Y/N” Jaehyun starts talking, “I didn't want you to feel forced to talk to me only because your friend wanted you to,” he seems genuine, “but I'm happy you texted back and we had this, mmm, kind of date?!” his ears turn red, and you find that extremely lovable, but agrees nevertheless
“I didn't want you to feel forced either. To be honest I wasn't expecting us to meet so soon but I'm happy we did, and I hope we can keep talking?” you enquire. “Sure, that sounds good” he agrees and tells you he would text you later. You wave him goodbye and head to your work.
Jaehyun was easy to talk to. You noticed that he was kind of shy, and more of a listener than a talker, but he was willing to have a conversation with you and you felt lucky for that. It was a good way to start your day.
You walk a few blocks until the bakery and see that Mark is already at the door waiting for you
“Hi fat head,” you greet him and he pouts while you unlock the door
“Hey, my head is not that big, ok?” He whines
You roll your eyes and smile to your friend, “Sure, baby,” you both enter the bakery and Mark goes straight to the cash register.
You hired him after he mentioned how hard it was to find a job. You have always found Mark smart and fully capable and you trusted him, so you offered him a part-time job as a cashier, since he had to go to college and take care of his younger brother sometimes.
It was good to have him working with you. You never said it out loud, but you felt happy whenever Mark was around. After Luna tried setting you both up, you two decided to stay friends. He still flirted with you sometimes, but in a friendly way. He had made clear that he adored you and loved being your friend, and said that maybe you didn't feel attracted to him because you were meant to be just friends. You agreed with him.
You go to the kitchen and start reading your orders for the day.
After hours, you take a moment to rest. You have always loved baking, it put you in a good mood. There was moments in your life were you randomly went to the kitchen, to divert your mind out of a concern and relieve stress. You love what you do.
You look for your phone and notice that you have a new message from Jaehyun
[New message from Jaehyun]: “Thank you for today, I had a pleasant time. I hope we can get to know more about each other,” you crack a smile and start typing a message to him when Mark comes rushing through the kitchen’s door
“Y/N... there's a, mm... customer, demanding to talk to you,” he sounds anxious and you wonder if there's something wrong with one of your cakes
“Did something happen?”
“N-no, he just, wants to talk” You barely had any problems with your orders. Every time a mistake happened it was due to the lack of explanation from the customer, not yours.
“Why are you so agitated?” You said, heading towards the front of the store, with Mark following your steps, “If you did something wrong tell me now and we can fix it”, 
“No, I didn't do anything, I promise, it's your–“ Mark was interrupted by a voice, a voice that you have never forgotten
“Y/N!”
No. No. No.
Note: hi! I hope this isn't too boring, i wanted you guys to know more about y/n and a little about Jaehyun lol hope you like it, thank you for reading and feel free to send asks!
happyjaehyunday <3
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