#happens too

[newvegascowboy]

+

#not fallout #kal talks #ok to preface this is a POSI VENT #it just might get a little heavy #i tend to be a Little Personal on here and im going to be a lil more personal. im thinky thoughts #but man... its been a year since literally the lowest point in my life #like last march. i will say. was... really bad for me mentally. i wont go much deeper than that but maybe some of you remember. #im much much better now but i will say i was a little wary as this month and anniversary approached because i was afraid basically #(the actual anniversary passed last week and i didnt notice) #but ive managed to do soo much growing and healing from where i was last year like it is honestly astonishing #im definitely not the same person i was when i couldn't even honestly confront myself #in a way i think what happened last year was one of the best things to happen to me #it doesn't mean that nothing bad will ever happen in the future but it does mean that i survived that and i can survive whatever else #happens too #healing isnt linear i know that. like obviously im going to have setbacks and some days im incredibly whiny and bitchy #like October/November were suuuper hard on me mentally #but again - still here! #still alive and still putting laundry away and taking baths and reading books and doing art #And its almost SUMMER again! #and god i want to live this summer. #and its kind of funny how...when you think you want to die just saying thr words 'i want to live' feels like...idk. it feels like something #but i want to live #and i want to go hike at zion and i want to eat watermelon and i want to sit in the sun and paint red rocks #i wanted to die last year and it felt so real i could have but im still here and i want to live and do things while im here #that's all i guess #life's hard. its a bitch and then you die. but there are some pretty good parts to it too and every summer i remember why

[liquidstar]

If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)

At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.

Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.

#i think about this story sometimes like yeah I'm proud of them for that too actually. good job baby brothers #they're not babies anymore of course they're turning 20 next year which is crazy #but they're still the type of people who'd do something if they saw something of this sort happen for sure #respectful of women and everyone else too. they're good guys #I'm glad I ended up with them living in my house against my will for like 14 years #anyway i have no idea where i was for all this but my best guess is probably a friends house given the time period #i was always at my besties house lol #i hope she's doing well too actually. haven't spoken in forever... #bestie from greek elementary school... if you're out there... let's get muffins and fanta at the bakery across the street again someday 💜☮️

[ayo-edebiri]

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse + text posts

#tw flashing #byaurore #across the spiderverse #spiderman #across the spiderverse spoilers #marveledit #filmedit #userallisyn #userchelsea #tuserhan #usersaoirse #useradie #userbbelcher #userpavlova #spiderman across the spiderverse #userpayel #not tagging more ppl because i don't know who has already watched it #it was sooooo good!!! #marvel (ok sony but....) gave us too good movies in a row??? in 2023??? what is happening

[just-french-me-up]

the urge to write is like a cat meowing for dear life for someone to open the goddamn door, who then shows utter disinterest in said open door

#writing #writing nightmare #writeblr #writers #writer's problems #writing problems #fanfic writers #i just need TIME #IT'S COMING THERE'S JUST TOO MUCH HAPPENING #mine

[ninjasmudge]

last night i had a dream that i was playing minecraft and i noticed i had 77 blocks of cobblestone in one slot instead of it being capped at 64 and it was so jarring to me that it literally booted me out of the dream. like sure you can fly now and your childhood home is a pharmacy but 77 pieces of cobblestone? unthinkable. wake the fuck up.

#minecraft #tagged so i can find it ig #PROBABLY MEANS I PLAY TOO MUCH MINECRAFT TBH #IT WAS 77 COBBLESTONE DO U UNDERSTAND HOW JARRING THAT WAS #IT LEGIT WOKE ME UP BC I WAS LIKE 'that cant fucking happen.' #shark talks #l

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail'' #ah tumblr... #writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" ..... #no.... not really..... #idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing... #this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey. #idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me. #i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

[embraceyourdestiny]

to any americans who feel "paralyzed" and "dont know what to do" to help with gaza:

reading a fucking book. i beg of you.

in a time of knowledge suppression is it your duty to arm yourself with knowledge.

read about americas occupations in the middle east.

read about 9/11 from outside of america and see how they inflicted senseless harm and violence to countless amounts of people and have been suppressing your rights for the past 2 fucking decades.

read about any of the countless wars from the past 30 years. especially from a civilian's. and the victims and survivors' perspective. listen to the horror stories and do not plug your fucking ears as to what your country is doing.

and read about fucking gaza and palestine and keep up with what is happening no matter how "sad" or "uncountable" you might get.

dont look away from this.

you dont have the right to be comfortable during countless active genocides.

if you're knowledgeable, you're powerful, and our current state doesnt fucking want that.

you have the power to change things if you open your eyes and scream to the world.

wake the fuck up.

Edit: please check the reblogs there are readings and ways to help

#og #truly if youre not about it your against it and i dont fuck with you because you're complacent #wake the fuck up #we're all responsible and dont you dare say you're not #americans need to stop living in the world with their eyes closed and their ears covered #look at what your fucking 'glorious country' is doing to people #everyone should be against america no fucking exceptions because america is violent and evil and needs to be stopped #then read about what america has done to the natives of their land #radicalize yourself #decolonize your mind #free palestine #land back #palestine will be free #theres too many fucking movements of just the past couple years all happening at once to act like the world is fucking fine #we are in a human rights CRISIS #WAKE THE FUCK UP PLEASE

[really-fucked-up-stimboards]

falling down a flight of stairs stimboard ?

#the same shit happened to my sister and she broke her nose #not me tho #I’m too cool to fall #stimboard #anti stim #cursed stimboard #fast gif #fast gif warning #shitpost #stim #stimboard requests #cursed stim #shitty stimboard #stim gifs #stimblr

[emberglowfox]

birds of a feather

#totk #loz #link #tulin #totk spoilers #my comics #my art #it is almost 8 in the goddamn morning and my hand is cramping SO bad but if i didnt make this i was going to die #anyways link's signs: page 2 panel 1 he's signing “danger” and page 2 panel 4 he's signing “important/significant” #also idr where i got the “hair braiding is significant to the rito” probably from the reva/ink i used to read back in the day #(censored so it doesnt show up in the tags just in case lol) #theyre everything to me. if you couldn't tell #they have a brother dynamic 2 me but its open to interpretation #idk wtf happened tonight. two long comics from me back to back is absurd #broke this one up also so its more viewable too #sparks art

[flowercrowngods]

when ao3 is back up i want all of you to leave comments on the fics you were interrupted from reading, the fics you were looking to find, the fics you were thinking about re-reading, and the fics left open in your tabs for months now.

when ao3 is back up, i want you all to show some love to your favourite writers, favourite fics, or even just the 600 word one-shot that brought a smile to your face that tuesday three weeks ago.

when ao3 is back up i want you all to remember that comments and explicitly voiced appreciation are what keep writers going.

#when ao3 is back up i want you to realise that this lack of fics to read is also what will happen if they go uncommented and unappreciated #ao3 #and while ao3 is still down go to your tumblr writers and leave them some love too

[tedcruzisthezodiackiller]

#inspired by a convo I had with a friend where she said the show made her glad she was more of a disney kid and not a nickelodeon kid #like girl you think these things weren't happening at disney too?? #quiet on set #nickelodeon #dan schneider

[mylittleredgirl]

that moment when you cross the point of no return with a character should be accompanied by a specific chime i think. like 🔔 congratulations! this one has been installed in the Permanent Collection and you will never stop thinking about them as long as you live

#that just happened to me in real time btw #they should maybe also consider a warning tone #unfollow that tag and log off right now or that's it for you. no going back. you're gonna name a pet after this one someday #i headcanon'd too close to the sun #containment breach

[smolldust]

Me, aroace: “Yeah I think these fictional characters are kinda hot”

Other people: “Oh you think they’re hot? Doesn’t that mean you’re not actually aroa-“

Me:

#smolldust #smolldust rambles #rambling #Shitpost #aroace #aromantic #asexual #aro #ace #this has happened to me too many times

[wearenotjustnumbers2]

This child in gaza is screaming:

"I wish it was a dream. Oh, mom and dad. I wish it was a dream and my mom and dad are still alive" after being rescued from underneath the rubble to find his parents killed by Israel.

Share this, we are not numbers. Let our voices be heard in hopes that this stops.

#i too wish it was all a dream #and I'm sitting surrounded by my family #you shouldn't go through that #he's so young why is this happening to our children? #palestine #gaza #israel #important #current events #ethnic cleansing #free gaza #free palestine #we are not numbers #gaza strip #gaza under genocide #gaza under attack #israel apartheid #video

[felucians]

Nex Benedict's death wasn't just for being transgender, it was for being native too. 2 Spirits are revered in many native cultures and it is a native-specific identity. This wasn't just a hate crime against trans & NB individuals, this was also a hate crime against Natives of Turtle Island.

You cannot separate Nex's trans identity from their native identity - this is a case of MMIWG2S (Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, Girls, and 2 Spirits).

Native children being killed at school is nothing new, so it's equally important to talk about Nex's native identity and being intersectional, this is a devastating tragedy for indigenous people, the queer community & especially those of us who are both indigenous and queer.

May Nex rest in peace 🪶

#too many people are ignoring their indigenous identity and how that plays a role in what happened #because 2 spirit is a trans AND indigenous identity - you cannot separate the two #and it is a disservice to Nex and all other 2 spirit to do so #as a queer indigenous woman my heart aches for Nex and their family #we as indigenous people have lost too many children to violence at schools #and we as queer people have lost too many to the rise of transphobia and TERFs and their attitudes #nex benedict #mmiwg2s #2 spirit #indigenous #queer #indigenous & queer #intersectionality #racism #transphobia

[prismit]

to any nonbinary people reading this, never forget:

you can collect SOUL by striking enemies. once enough SOUL is collected, you can hold B to focus SOUL and regain health.

#ghost town... 2! #hollow knight #idk my brain hurts lmao. too much beat saber. sorry if someone's already made this joke lol it happens