#for anyone who has not read thr yet:

[i-will-always-love-the-jedi]

Elzar Mann shortest firebrand confirmed

(I passed the first half of the final two years of school, so this is my celebration I guess)

whole panel:

Anyways we stan tall lady Avar Kriss, who btw is way too tired to put up with her best friends bullshit

...

#pls ignore the horrendous background #and my inconsistent drawing style #anyways #i like tiny elzar he looks so silly #the boots suit him tho #stellan thinks hes going crazy the moment he first sees them #they hold a council of the firebrands #and decide with democracy 2 against 1 that the hot pink boots need to go #elzar does not like that outcome #cuz hes back to being shortest #tbh for all avar cares #he could have kept them #girl is too busy losing her mental health anyways #for anyone who has not read thr yet: #this is their relationship #also how tf does starlight beacon look on the inside #i dont know for certain #so i improvised #the high republic #avar kriss #elzar mann #stellan gios #hes not IN it #but he is a firebrand so #and part of the story in the tags which no one will read anyways

[justaghostingon]

How to be a Bad Husband without Shijie getting Mad at You

A guide by Wei Wuxian

An arranged marriage au because i’ve been reading to many of them recently.

Just after the sunshot campagin, the jiang are still rebuilding, and jiang cheng realizes he has a problem

The jin want to marry jin zuxian to yanli, and take the jiang in as a vassal state, which he doesn’t want

And wei wuxian’s rep isn’t doing them any favors

He needs to rebuild his alliances, establish themselves, and do it fast

So when the lan’s offered a new treaty he said yes immediately, before reading it

He really should have read it, because it wasn’t a treaty, it was lan xichen, tired of his brother’s pining, offering an engagement deal between lan zhan and wei wuxian

Now jiang cheng can’t back out without losing face, and in this state he really can’t afford too.

So wei wuxian finds himself engaged to lan zhan, counting down the days towords their rapidly approaching marriage

As you can imagine, wei Wuxian is not happy about marrying someone who he thinks hates him and his cultivation methods

He complains bitterly to shijie and jiang cheng

Jiang cheng is as annoyed as he is but he can’t think of a way out without rhe lans drawing out first

Wei wuxian says he’ll just drive lan zhan away! Make him want to divorce!

Then yanli steps in, and scolds wei wuxian fiercely,

See lan zhan is marrying out, coming to yumeng to live to a culture he doesn’t know among strangers.

Jiang yanli, who was engaged to do the same once upon a time, has been trained on what to expect, a s knows exactly how hard it can be for someone who doesn’t have her husband’s respect

So help her, her brother will not be one of those faithless dogs!

Neither jiang cheng nor wei wuxian have ever heard yanli call anyone “faithless dog,” and in that moment she looks too much like her mother for either of them to cross her

But wei wuxian’s not out of the game yet.

No one knows lan wangji better than him

This goody-goody is here to play martyr, to play cleansing and keep wei wuxian from his wicked ways, but he doesn’t really like him

He’s hear to be a jailer, not a husband.

All wei ying has to do is treat him like a husband, with all the affection, touch, and teasing that comes with it! Lan Wangji’s three least favorite things!

Lan wangji will be screaming for divorce in a week!

Wei wuxian doesn’t get to put his plan into action until after the wedding, as he isn’t allowed to see lan wangji until then

But once its over, he puts his plan in full swing

First step: cuddling. Lan Wangji hates touch, wei wuxian loves it. So naturally to drive lan wangji mad, he needs to touch him constantly, sitting in his lap, holding his hand, cuddling at night, etc

This does not work. Lan wangji was a little hesitant at first, but now he seems to be tolerating it with only the slight reddening of his ears to show his rage

He even seems upset when wei wuxian isn’t sitting in his lap!

Wei wuxian thought at first that this was because they were inside their house and home, but when he plopped himself down on lan zhan’s lap at a sect conference, in fromt of everyone…lan zhan put his ARMs around his WAIST like this was NORMAL

Now wei Wuxian is the weird one who’s tucking his head into lan wangji’s neck, embarrassed

From this experience wei wuxian realizes something: Lan Zhan’s a secret cuddle bug!!!

He just never got the chance thanks to all those stuffy clan rules

And well, wei wuxian can’t leave a fellow cuddle bug hanging can he? Think about all thr hugs lan zhan has missed that he needs to make up for! He’ll just have to think of something else.

Step Two: presents. Lan zhan never liked any of the porn or alchol wei wuxian tried to give him before, so clearly he’s gonna hate it if wei wuxian gives him that and more!

Wei wuxian starts piling lan wangji with gifts. Porn! They’re married now so he can’t refuse! Alcohol, the best of the best! Spicy food he made himself! This pretty ribbon he saw at thr market and thought of lan zhan! This lantern with a bunny on it! That silk with bunnies…this painting of bunnies…

He might have gone a bit overboard with the bunnies

No matter what he gives him, lan wangji takes it with solemn grattitude, and tries it out. This proves a problem when lan wangji keeps eating the spicy food even as it clearly hurts him

Shijie frowns disaprovingly at him once while watching lan wangji guzzle water, and wei ying swore to do it never again

The less said about the alcohol incident the better

There is one more serious gift he gives lan wangji, one he knows he won’t dissaprove of. Smuggled among the presents and clothes, he brings in new “attendents” who look suspiciously like those wen remandents who seemingly vanished into thin air from their containment camp.

Lan wangji takes them in gravely, and soon their home is filled with the sound of laughter as a small boy runs after lan zhan

So clearly gifts aren’t working. Time for step three: sex

…..

…..lan zhan won.

Maybe all those gifts of porn were a bad idea, sullying such a pure mind

At this point Wei Wuxian is getting desperate, nothing he does is making lan wangji less willing to marry him. Its time for desprate measures…

Step Four: tell the truth. He’s never going to stop demonic cultivation and return to the sword path. He can’t.

He needed to tell him anyway, with all the touching they do, it was only a matter of time before he figured it out himself.

Lan Wangji says nothing as wei wuxian explains how he lost his core (still not mentioning how, he’ll take jiang cheng’s secret to the grave) how he was in the burial mounds, how its gone, gone gone and this is all he has left!

Before he knows it he’s a sobbing mess, tears and snot trailing down his face.

Not a very pretty picture for a husband huh?

Lan wangji only opens his arms, and pulls wei wuxian close, letting him cry himself silly in his arms.

It hurts, but it also feels good, safe, like lan zhan is a rock who will stay steady even against the tide of his own emotions

Still, it was a lot, and once he calms down he thinks this time, for sure, lan wangji will leave. He was kind in the confession, because that’s his nature, but surely, surely he doesn’t want to stay chained to a man who can’t even cultivate.

Jiang yanli asks to speak to lan wangji privately, to check in on how he’s adjusting, and wei wuxian sneaks in to listen, bracing for the worst

…when had the worst become lan zhan leaving?

Yanli asks if he has any complains, wei wuxian tenses, and lan zhan…

“I’ve never been so happy,” lan zhan says, because lan’s do not lie.

Wei wuxian is so shocked he tumbles from his hiding place. Yanli frowns with exasperation at him but all his attention is on lan wangji

Do you mean it? He asks

Of course,” lan wangji nods, then adds, “i love you” as if it were the simplest thing in the world.

Wei wuxian is laughing, he’s crying, he has an armful of lan zhan and the taste of his lips and well…

Maybe this marriage thing is pretty great actually.

The end

#the untamed #the untamed au #mo dao su zhi #mdsz #mdsz au #arranged marriage #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wei ying #lan zhan #jiang yanli #jiang cheng #wens #wen qing and wen ning were fake mustaches to disguise themselves and gaslight jiang cheng into believing they’re someoen else #wangxian #wangxian au

[momolady]

November Patreon Rewards: Hearthway Hollow

Hearthway Hollow has everything that the autumn needs. They celebrate Halloween starting in July. They have the world's best coffee shops, cozy blankets,bonfires, and of course, werewolf lovers to snuggle on chilly nights.

This November, feel like you've just visited with this wonderful trinkets straight from the Hearthway Hollow welcome center!

A Hearthway Hollow gradient logo (designed by me). A classic logo by @smogteeth. And a 'Hot Werewolf Girlfriend' coaster with art by @chopshoppar

$20 and up will get everything, while the rest of the mail out patrons will receive two items at random! (Exciting? Probably not.)

Not only that, starting in November, I will be doing a special ebook each month before anyone else. This month, as you can guess by the survey I put out, I'll be doing a collection of the best Hearthway Hollow characters. So make sure to vote on this survey so your favorite characters make it into the ebook.

Not only will you receive all of this in November, but you'll also join the Momolady discord server. There you'll get to chat with other monster lovers and creatives to find new friends and new monsters to love. You'll also be able to talk with me but that feels less exciting.

Sign up to my Patreon now and you'll also be able to get all October rewards!

Stories that are and will be available on Patreon that have yet to be published will also be yours to read! Including:

A collection of stories not published anywhere else.

A Hearthway Hollow story about two teachers that I never published because I didn't think it was good.

A vampire novel that I wrote ten years ago.

Rhys, a lizardman, reunites with his former lover who left her life of sexwork to escape the dangerous city she was in.

Preview to what would have been a seqeul to my story Huntress int he castle.

A spin-off of Aymeric's story about his little brother Laeretes.

Romarod is an orc, traveling through Elderbay, a port within Obresh that used to be a really seedy neighborhood. And all he wants are some baked goods.

Art is an orc who inherited his family's art supply store. It needs renovations and bad, so he hires you to take care of it.

Alcide is a high ranking vampire who controls a giant spacecraft as it makes a pilgrimage to the vampire sanctuary. You are a special human who Alcide takes care of.

Jian thr Rakshasa retuns in a new tale as he take the narration reigns to explain how the relationship between him and Rika has grown.

A woman realizes she's been put under a spell, and her fae lover Kerwyn is in desperate need of her help.

Onyx the Tabaxi returns with new sexy adventures in the confinges of her close knit village.

An older woman is being haunted by a Leshy, a forest spirit who is trying to repay the kindness of her long gone husband.

Jasper is a bugbear who keeps a very neat shop. He and his lover have been seperated for a long while, now he's been kidnapped and she must rescue him.

Zaejin and Perik return! And Zaejin wants his promised bread.

Jacqueline is a Dullahan and a chocletier. An while she's no Willy Wonka, her Halloween tradition brings her into a sweet relationship with a female patron.

Five paralangua vie for the attentions of one Chosen when the other four fail to return home for the Festival of Ash.

Plus so much more!

#exophilia #teratophiilia #monster lover #monster boyfriend #monster girlfriend #monster smut #monster lemon #monster romance #teratophilia writing #exophilia writing #patreon #writblr #writing community

[kichikichiko]

"Lonely"

Self indulgent post. Its kinda based off of how I grew up

Wanderer x fem!reader, comfort, fluff, can be read as platonic or romantic, not proofread

♡♡♡♡

"Lonely"

If you were to describe your life from the day you could walk and talk to now, the one word would be "lonely"

Dont get me wrong, you had friends growing up. Maybe a lot, maybe only a few, and even then, it still feels like you againts the world.

No matter who you hang out with, the connection between you and your friend was never strong.

You knew, but brushed it off. Because at least having someone to talk to about something, anything is better than being alone.

But you were still "lonely", no matter how many people you surround yourself with.

You get attached easily, to anyone no matter who.

Toxic, boring, stupid, it doesnt matter

As long as they give you just a bit of attention, you'll suddenly cling onto them like theyre youre everything.

And yet

You were still "lonely"

Its frustrating. Why does the world want you to be lonely? Why should you feel this way in the first place? What could you have possibly done to anger the gods? Or was this their way of entertainment?

You'd blame all the hurt you've been through to anyone who isnt you. Especially celestia itself. Because if you blamed it on yourself, the more you'd feel worse.

"Lonely" was once your enemy, your foe. But the more you grew older, the more you've become tired with trying to get rid of it whether it be through masking yourself with different made up personalities for every single person you talk to, trying to talk to different people to find the one who matchrs your energy, or blaming the gods of teyvat and all its mortals for making you feel the way you feel, the more you've surrendered and accepted the "lonely" into your life.

Youve given up.

Because what was the point of trying at this point?

You can no longer blame people for your misery and woes.

At the end of the day, you are the problem.

Detaching yourself from the world, half of your life became a blur. You didnt remember if you still took up on the act of imitating everyone elses personalites, or if you completely stopped talking to people in general.

You didnt remember,

But what you did remember was meeting him.

Buying fruits from the bustling stalls of Sumeru, you finally met him.

From the corner of your eye, you saw an interesting figure.

Turning your head to get a better look you studied thr man from afar.

He seemed to be from inazuma judging by his attire. His whole outfit was coloured blue and white, his huge hat sitting on his head in a way which made him look intimidating and mysterious rather than silly, his eyes uninterested and annoyed, as his chesr glowed because of his anemo vision.

You stared at him for a while longer before he dissappeared in a blink of an eye.

You didnt know what you felt. But it was something weird, in a good way of course.

"I wanna see him again" you mumbled.

Months have passed, and from time to time, the strange man from inazuma would pop into your head as you daydream in silence when you were goung out with your friends.

Sometimes you think youre creepy, stupid and yhat you were "doing it again". Mainly insinuating that you'd get attached to someone you barely know and make scenarios of you both being together as a coping mechanism.

One day your friend has decided to invite you to try a cooking class with her. You dont really get invited out that much, so you werent about to pass up on this opportunity.

Both you and your friend arrived and was lead to your perspective stations. The instructor wanted everyone to find someone random around the room to be partners, so everyone can get to know each other and make the place more lively.

Going out of your comfort zone was hard, but thinking youre being a nuisance was harder. So you sighed in defeat.

Everyone finally got a partner but you,

You were standing there awkwardly, getting ready to tell the instructor that you're perfectly fine with being alone. Youve been alone for half of your life, being alone as you were in cooking class with no different.

Before you got the chance to talk, someone barged through the door, making everyone shift their focus on the door.

Your eyes widen when you saw who it was. It was the mysterious Inazuma guy. You were shocked, stunned and frozen in place.

Never once believe that you'd see him again

"Ah youre just in time! This young lady here doesnt have a partner for todays class so you can go right ahead and stand next to her station"

The mysterious men scoffed and walk towards your station standing right beside you without a word.

You were starting to feel nervous as there was no conversation coming up between the both of you. You thought that maybe you were the only one overthinking this because anytime you glance at him he would look unbothered and uninterested just like he did when you first saw him in that market few months back

"You can stop looking at me miss" crossing his arms and looking at you with one eyebrow up.

God he was intimidating and handsome

No no. Just intimidating you correxted yourself

Flinching you quickly apologised and whipped your head back and looked down at the table.

Wanderer knew you saw him on that day in the market, he's very observant what can he say?

"Call me wanderer" he broke the silence, looking down at the ingredients on the table, not listening to the instructor

You looked at him again, blinking

You wanted to question why on earth his name is "wanderer" but got a hunch that he'll be offended and stop talking.

"Nice to meet you wanderer, Im (name)" you responded

"Well (name) let's show everyone here who's the boss at cooking" he smirked a bit, determined to win

You were stunned. This wasnt even a cooking competition you wanted to tell him, but that might ruin the fun

So you smiled a little and nodded. "Right on it!"

Days after days passed, and if youre lucky enough you'd see him on the bustling streets of Sumeru, if you both make eye contact, you'd smile and wave as he nodded then go about your day

Soon that change, from simple hand waves, to small talks, to full blow on conversations to hanging out outside of sumeru city.

His company was nice, it felt warm and comfortable. You didnt have to imitate his energy, and you never tried to. Something about copying his personality just to talk to him felt off.

As much as he didnt wanna admit it, he also felt comfortable with you, not 100% no but if he were to be able to choose to go on walks alone or be with you he wouldnt hesitate to pick one with you.

You finally felt comfortable in your own skin

And suddenly, you didnt feel so "lonely" anymore.

♡♡♡♡

#genshin fanfic #fanfic #genshin fluff #genshin impact #x reader #genshin x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #wanderer x y/n #wanderer x reader #scaramouche x you #wanderer x you #scaramouche x y/n

[factorialsotherfandoms]

In which Emi takes after her mother in more ways than one.

(For @rabbit-harpist , but also anyone else who wants to read it)

(Also on ao3)

There are university brochures scattered all over the dining room table, a sea of bright colours and photographs of smiling young adults. Most are Mexican establishments - they do live there, after all - but there's a couple from Lucie's old home of Switzerland, Diego's Brazil, Jeffry's America... A scattering of places under one roof, just like their family.

Emi is leafing through one, while Lucie looks at another, a spreadsheet with the local crime rates and housing costs also up on her laptop.

"What about here?" Lucie asks, passing the booklet over to her daughter. "It looks pretty, no? And it is very good for programming."

"It's too far away," Emi barely looks at it, same as most of the rest. "I want to stay close."

"You're good enough," Lucie knows Emi's been fine traveling before - surely the problem is the grades? "I know you can do it."

"It's not that," Emi looks down, and to the side, fingers flexing uncomfortably against the paper. "I want to stay with you. To help."

"I have your fathers," Lucie promises. "And if I need lady help, Abuelita is here."

"Not like that," a bit of a snap. "With your investigations! I know I need to learn to program better, but I speak French, and Portuguese, and English, and Spanish, and I can run, and I can hide, and I'm a very fast reader! I know I'm not old enough yet, but once I turn eighteen..."

"Non."

Lucie's response is immediate, instinctual, soaked in blood and in fear and in all the things that have happened.

"No?"

"It's too dangerous," Lucie says, and all she can see are the corpses of friends she has made. "You can keep helping with the planning, but you are not coming."

"Why not? You do it all the time!"

"It's not safe! Do you think we want this for you? To see you loose limbs and eyes and your life! You could be something, Emi! Why would you throw it away to end up in some monster's stomach?!"

"Because I want to help! You're out there - you're all out there all the time - and I'm sick of being helpless! I'm eighteen in six months! I've been training, practicing! I can do it if you let me!"

"Emília Sophia da Silva," there's fear in Lucie's spine, fear she hasn't felt since the eighth time one of them nearly died, fear she didn't think she knew how to feel anymore, not when the tenth passed and she had not recovered - fear that comes out as a snap and a shout. "You are /not/ getting more involved than you already are! You never should have been involved in the first place!"

"Well I am involved now! And you can't stop me! If you won't let me join your team, I'll just find someone else's!"

"Why can't you just be a normal child and stay safe?!"

"I stopped being a normal child the day I watched my father die!"

"And maybe we just want to give you a normal life! Just wait a bit longer! Until you graduate, until you find yourself at least!"

"I thought you of all people would understand!" Emi screams back, voice finally cracking. "And I know who I am! I've always known who the fuck I am!"

"You're seventeen! No seventeen year old knows who they are!"

"I'm /your/ daughter, aren't I?!"

Lucie freezes.

Emi watches her for a moment, before turning and fleeing. She leaves the door to the dining room open, but cracks the handle into the wall as she throws it to the side.

One, two, three...

A door upstairs slams shut.

Lucie burrows her head in her hands, and she screams in frustration.

She screams, and it becomes sobs, and Benito answers. He whistles, leaning on the doorframe, watching her cry.

Lucie takes a deep breath, wipes her tears, turns to him, "you heard that, then?"

"Well, yeah, I think the neighbors did too. You too really don't know how to be quiet, do you?"

"Not now, Benito," Lucie keeps herself in check better than she expected she could. "Not right now."

He comes over, sits down, picks up the brochure Emi had been favour and starts flicking through. It might have taken them all a few years, but he has learnt how to be quiet.

Lucie takes her time, hisses her frustrations through her teeth. Stupid child, foolish child, why can't she want things a normal child wants? Why can't she just want to go out to the club, get drunk, fall asleep on someone's couch and have to get to lectures in the morning?

"Why can't she be /safe/?" is the frustration she verbalises, the one at the root of it all.

Benito grabs another booklet, starts flicking through that instead, "she's your daughter."

"She's your daughter too," Lucie doesn't even have a pencil to hand, so she threatens him with a finger. "Fuck this. I'm getting wine."

She goes to move and fetch some, only for Benito to reveal he's been carrying some the whole time. She snatches the bottle, takes a couple of mouthfuls, and hands it back.

Benito uses a glass.

Faker.

"You know what I mean, though," Benito swishes his glass - and, ah, he just wanted to be dramatic. "She's grown up surrounded by this. Just like Luis isn't escaping the mob, she isn't escaping the Order."

"I just want her to be safe," Lucie gestures to her legs, to the scar peeking out from Benito's sunglasses, to the photo on the mantle where Jeffrey has a broken leg. "What sort of parents are we, that we can't keep her safe?"

"We were never going to," and Benito has shifted, taking on that quieter, reflective voice that Lucie hates because it means he has finally decided to talk sense. "The moment her father walked her into Pancea's office? She was never going to be safe again."

"She's going to die," Lucie whispers. "I'm letting my baby die, if I let her do this."

"And you're killing her yourself if you don't," Benito finally drinks some of the wine, almost two thirds of his glass in one go. "Pancea killed her father, the Order saved her mother, and gives her the chance for revenge."

Lucie is fairly sure it isn't about revenge for Emi, it's about the fact her parents keep going back into danger, and she's at home and helpless and...

And Lucie understands.

She does understand, she understands so well; she could have stayed away, Benito, Jeffrey, Diego and Luis could all have stayed away, but they didn't. They didn't, because still hunted they weren't safe. They didn't because the others were going, or because they couldn't live with not knowing, or because hunting the monsters makes those under the bed less threatening, or...

Lucie likes to think they joined the Order to save people, but she knows it's a lie.

They did it to save themselves, to save each other, and because when the world had decided they were nothing they /refused/ to accept it and they demanded to leave their mark.

"When did you start making sense?" Lucie asks, but she knows, she knows, and she knows why too.

"About when Abuelita kicked it into me," he laughs.

It wasn't.

It was with blood on his hands and screaming for help, it was in nights huddled under a closet praying nothing would hurt him, it was when the other cell in the city were wiped out overnight, and it was Benito who had to autopsy the corpses.

Lucie leans over as much as she can; Benito shuffles over, lets her rest her head on his shoulder.

"Sounds about right," she says, and she breathes, and continues. "Maybe it would be nice to have Emi close? Abuelita would like her to be able to come for family dinners."

"Exactly!" Benito's grin picks back up, and he gestures with his glass. "And nobody says no to Abuelita, not even in her old age."

"Oui," Lucie shuts her eyes, and sighs, and adds. "... I should go apologise."

"Finish the bottle first," Benito passes it to her. "Let Pizza Boy calm her down and Diego talk it through with her first."

He isn't a pizza boy, not any more - but its comforting, perhaps, how the nickname sticks.

She takes a glass this time. Benito half-fills it, and she takes the time to sip it.

Cheap shit, of course, because it's still fucking Benito.

#opq fanfic #opq emi #opq lucie #opq benito #alternate universe #lucie lives au #they'll sort it out I promise it'll just take a few hours for tempers to die first #Emi probably will be allowed to do stuff with them but only in the holidays and only 'easier' tasks #I haven't hashed that out yet but it'll be a lot of negotiating for everyone #because there's literally no solution where nobody's unhappy #I needed to full name emi so I looked up common girls names and surnames in brazil #and then just tried to make it sound nice #using her father's name as I think she'd rather keep it than need to pick between the player party's surnames #that'd imply favouritism towards one of her parents

[kari-go]

Hi! Idk if the kwamies are just for fun or what, but I got the curage (and maybe it's fun) to list what my ideas (for my head"cannon" Miraculouses 😁)

Zebra - equalization, can turn things into their opposite

Llama - commitment, can shoot energy-spit and link the user to the target

Snail - syncronization, the user can sync with targets and control their moves, eithet making them mimic his movements or moving them like a hivemind, working to achive a goal. It also works backword, so othets can control the user's movements (this way it can learn techniques the other can do)

Hedgehog - so far, having pocket dimension to hide or trap othets, maybe change it later...

Pidgeon - generalization. The owner can make itself "unrecogniseable", meaning despite being a person in pidgeon costume, you can't recognise it, simply blends in (you only can spot them if you looking for something very-very specific about them)

Antelope - intention. If the user touches you with it's two horned stick you start to do whatever idea you currently head, even if it's crazy or unlikely to have any succes, the target starts it enthusiasticly

Rhino - potential. The user can "suck" the potential energy from things, making them living "object-magnet" atracting everything, even if it means an unpleasant crush... The user also can charge object with it, making them fly

Firefly - transition. Can become living energy, moving thing and even empovering machines. Literal force

Kangaroo - swich. Can swiching placement of object with limited range

Has no red panda (yet!)😅

Capybara - relaxation. The user simply can others feel good, whatever happening to them

Rattlesnake - avareness. Having bracelet with a campus like rattle-pointer which shows where a previously marked object is

Giraffe - exhaltion (stolen, since they modified the tiger to elation😁) choosing any ability, the user becomes the bes-best in it (like being humanly in the Guinise record book for it, and turn it up by Miraculous -holder standards)

Hippo - overprotection/motherly care (something along those line) can create a bubble where the target just sleeps and floats. This bubble saves the target very well, but not all-proof

Sloth - procrestination. Every time the target would like to do something, manipulates fate to do something (like, insted of taking Miraculous away, goes on for personal revenge (also gains litteral weight to arms and legs)

No racoon or beaver yet

Donkey - humblenes. With a whip, can make the target obey instractions of thr user and behave foolish

Coala - influence. Gives power to do whatever you wish, but limited very much how much support and love does the holder has from the sorrunding peaple...

I hope you like them or find some of them funny, there are many more, some of these even have "pairs" (won't grant wish, but opposite concepts, like LB and CN's), but I like these, hope you to, but I gladly reading your feedback on these as well 😁.

Have a nice day!🙂

They are just for fun but I don't think I would mind adding them if I got an idea for the miraculous and a weapon.

I already have a power for the zebra, anyone who sees them would get vertigo.

Ooh, so like a tracker I like that. They would spit on them and the spit would always be visible to the user. It could wear off over time, I really like this power.

That's really interesting, kinda reminds me of Martyr (black cat) and Mimic (wolf).

That sounds pretty similar to the ferret.

Oh, that's cool. Another I thought of was that they can spy with their feathers xd. But I think I like this one better.

So kinda giving them enough confidence to do that? That's cool, my thoughts were super speed but I like this one.

The salamander already has that power (Tag).

Oh, that's interesting. Kinda seems like an extension of the white lion.

That seems very similar to the panda.

I also haven't thought of one for the red panda 😔.

I see where you're coming from and it fits the capybara, but I already have that power (dove).

That seems similar to the llama.

That seems like the rooster but harder to explain to me. I know that I would have issues with that.

I like that! It's like a combination of betta fish and sheep. I like it.

Hmmm, interesting.

My original thought for the racoon was that they can steal powers, like the butterfly now. But that was when the layers didn't exist. For the beaver, I like the power that @randypelow suggested, the holder pulls objects to make a dome (like a knock-off Shellter).

The donkey was one of the oldest kwamis I had, he was made with Inn and I¨m pretty sure he was the only one who had a power from the set xd. The concept was Adaptation (or versatility at first) and the holder could change the suits to fit the situation, basically like the power-ups. But then I gave that power to the octopus and then I removed it xd. What you suggested seems kinda tricky to me I would have to think about it more.

So like the canon eagle or just a big amount of confidence?

I like a lot of these! You always have so many interesting ideas!

#ask #miraculous ladybug #miraculous disaster au #kwamis #kwami oc #rhino miraculous

[glitterandmoondustofficial]

Side to Side

Chapter 247: Selfish

Notes:

Characters: Ruby Rating: Mature Warnings: Language, relationship drama Notes: uhhhhh hi? Not sure who still reads this but hey! Here’s a four month late chapter. There’s a couple reasons why I’m so late and one of them being that this chapter was kinda hard to write and you’ll see why when you read it. Another reason is just my stress levels have been bonkers. Thr final reason is that bg3 really has almost taken over my life. BUT FEAR NOT!!!! Law and Ruby are still at the forefront of my mind this chapter was just difficult and a long time coming. Like planned for years but I wanted to make sure it was as good as I hoped.

~~~~~~

Ruby tried to not be stuck in her own head when things were quiet. Although “quiet” was pretty subjective in Dressrosa. There were so many loud and bright parties on the island. Every night she could see the lights shining through her window in her flat. 

One of the first non-essential items she had bought was a sleep mask. This was too joyous for her at the moment. Then again she was being such a drag that maybe she wasn’t the best judge of joyous things. She was quite bitter about her situation. She was very bitter actually. She wanted to go home. She wanted to be on the Tang with her crew. She wanted Shachi to braid her hair and she wanted to gossip with Ikkaku. 

Instead she was playing spy for Law. Which she had done to herself. Law did try to stop her multiple times. Multiple times. She couldn’t blame him. She shouldn’t blame him. 

But part of her did. 

Deep down she blamed him for everything. 

She was angry and she was bitter. She was so goddamn mad. 

She should be blaming herself, and she probably actually did. This was all her decision. From being in Dressrosa to agreeing to being in a relationship with Law. 

Ruby sat on Law’s bed. Cotton balls were in between her toes as the nail polish dried. Her hair was in a bun and a mud mask was on her face.

Law sat at his desk, mumbling and grumbling and huffing. He tapped his pen on a notebook in annoyance. He was in a bad mood. 

“Hey, Law?” Ruby called, tapping her fingers against her thigh. “Why don’t you come to bed?” He stopped tapping his pen but didn’t turn to her and he didn’t say anything. Ruby frowned. “Law?”

“Not in the mood,” he said. “I have work to do.”

Ruby sighed. “I just want to spend time with you,” she said quietly. “Do you not want to spend time with me?” He didn’t answer. “Is that a “no?””

“Get some sleep, Rube,” he said.

Ruby frowned deeply, an ache in her chest, an anger in her chest. Why couldn’t he just spend time with her? Why couldn’t he just hold her?

She sighed and got out of his bed. She took the cotton balls from between her toes and threw them on the nightstand, a petty way of showing him her anger. She quietly left for the crew quarters, not bothering to wish him goodnight. 

Maybe her and Law weren’t as healthy as she had originally thought. When recalling their relationship she tried to only think of the good things, the loving things, even the sad things, but she didn’t think about the bad stuff, the annoying stuff. All their arguments and when they were bad to each other. 

She had shown everyone her relationship as if she had put the rose tinted glasses on them instead of her because she knew how they were. She knew that he was irritable, impolite, and, honestly, unhealthy. And she also knew she was irritable, impolite, and, honestly, a bitch. Two assholes who tried to find comfort in each other and yet were so stupidly bad at it that they were irritated half the time. How could she possibly show that to anyone, especially when the crew seemed so happy for them?

And they had good moments. God, they had some wonderfully good moments. The moments where her heart soared and she knew exactly why she loved him. The Law that he could be. The Law he should be. Not the Law that he was. 

Of course not. How could he be?

How could he be anything other than obsessive, irritable, violent, and angry? Some pirate captain who was so focused on his revenge that he didn’t pay attention to his girlfriend half the time. Of course she focused on the good things. Of course she only showed everyone the good things. 

“Law, just listen to me,” she said. “All I’m asking is for you to chill out for, like, an hour.”

“Okay. I’m not going to,” he bit. He stared down at her like she was a minor annoyance. Like she was a fly buzzing in his ear. 

“Why the hell not? I’m your girlfriend! You’re supposed to want to spend time with me.”

“I don’t want to,” he said. “I have more important things to do.”

“More important things than just holding hands for an hour?”

“Don’t you find yourself selfish? You can’t monopolize my time.”

She grinded her teeth together. “I’m allowed to fucking be selfish. I love you! I want to just spend time with you!”

“We’ll have sex later,” he said and waved her off. “Isn’t that half of being in a relationship?” He said it so casually, so flat, that she wasn’t sure how to feel. 

“Does it all mean so little to you?” She asked, trying to get anything from him. 

He scoffed. “Don’t pull that,” he snapped. “You know that I love you, I’m allowed to not make you a priority. Don’t try that manipulation tactic on me, Rube, I’m not one of your victims.” She breathed through her nose. A rough puff of air, letting him know that she was pissed. “Why do you do this when I’m trying to focus? You only do this when I’m trying to work.”

“It’s not like I’m scheming to pull you away,” she argued. “I just think you should spend some time away from the desk and with me. Could you have a little more faith in me?”

“As the person who knows you best on this damn ship I’d say I have the right amount of faith in you.”

She felt like screaming. She felt like walking up to him and shaking him until that damn brain of his rattled against his skull. Instead she turned on her heel. “Come to me when you feel like apologizing. Otherwise I’m not returning to this room.”

Ruby laid on her back as she stared at the ceiling. Guitars and singing were loud enough to be heard echoed in her flat. The lights from the party shone through the window. 

“Were we even good to each other?” She asked herself. “Were we always covering up what we really were?” She sighed. “Does he love me? Do I love him?” Tears rolled down her cheeks, her chest burning in pain. “No, I love him. I do!” She argued against herself. “I’m just alone. I’m just stupid and selfish and…” she sniffed. “God, he really does suck . What was I thinking?!” She laughed through her sobs, tears rolling down her face and onto her pillow. 

“So, Elissa,” Maria interrupted Ruby’s thoughts as she swept the floor. “What do you do for fun?”

Ruby blinked and looked over to the woman. “Uhm.” What to say. Did she have normal hobbies? What did she like to do again? Did she even remember who she was? “I guess I like fashion and art.”

“You guess?” She questioned while she cocked her head. 

“I, uh, yeah,” Ruby said and shifted. “You know, makeup and dresses and stuff like that.”

Maria stared at her, her eyes appraising her. “You must have left a lot of yourself behind when you left your island,” she said with a nod. “I can only imagine what it’s like picking up pieces after you’ve lost someone the way you have.”

Ruby stared at her and she felt herself hardening her core. Covering up the toxic waste that was her heart and mind. “Ah, yeah,” she sighed. “Yeah, something like that. Leaving myself behind and whatnot. That’s how this works, right? I’m afraid I’ve lost my mind!”

Maria laughed and Ruby bit her tongue as she smiled. “Do you like dancing?”

Ruby’s eyebrows twitched. “I suppose I do?”

“Great!” Maria clapped. “Let’s go out tonight!”

“Wha- really?”

“Of course! You know, us Dressrosans are quite passionate dancers! I believe you’ll be quite impressed with us!”

Ruby chuckled. A tired smile spread across her face. “I see. Well, alright, I could use some fun in my life.”

“Great! Meet me here at 8:00!”

Ruby stared at herself in the mirror. 

She stared at her bruised eyes, her frown, and her dull hair. 

“What in the goddamn…” she mumbled to herself. “Is this really what I look like?” She rubbed her face with her fingers. “Fucking shit. I look like…like shit!” She pulled away from the bathroom counter and rubbed her face. “Whyyyy did I agree to this?!” She huffed. “This is supposed to be a covert operation and I’m going to a party in the enemy’s territory?! Law is going to kill me!” She huffed and stared at herself in the mirror again, tears rolling down her face. She watched the tears and her furious face. “Why am I pissed? Why am I considering this? Because I’m mad at Law? Am I fucking rebelling against him? How stupid am I? Fuck!” She threw her makeup bag at the shower door, its contents spilling out. “Everyone is right about me. He was right about me. I’m so goddamn selfish.” She sobbed. 

“Ruby,” Law groaned. “The world doesn’t revolve around you and your needs.”

“And why not?” She grinned at him cutely.

He stared at her, that annoyed crease in his brows that he always got when he wasn’t giving in to her. “Because your needs are simple and irritating. I’m not going shopping with you.”

“You know there was a time where you used to go out of your way to do things with me,” she said and placed her fists on her hips. “What changed? Why don’t you want to spend time with me?”

“Well, you already let me fuck you, why go out of my way to do anything else?”

Ruby’s eyes widened. “Are…are you serious?! How fucking dare you!” She hadn’t felt a rage like this in years. She turned around and started to walk out of the room. “I can’t look at you, you goddamn asshole.” She was pulled back by the arm roughly. “Don’t fucking try. I am more than sex you fucker.” She snatched her arm back. 

“Would you just let me apologize!”

“Why?! So you can just do it again?” Her voice cracked, betraying her. Her bottom lip shook and tears of rage filled her eyes. 

“Ruby, just listen to me,” Law groaned, exasperated. “I’m sorry, dammit. I took it too far.” He sighed and lifted his hand to her face. He wiped a tear with his thumb. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “You’re more to me than that. You’ve always been more.”

Ruby stared at the dancing women in their flowy skirts. The men playing guitars. The flowers. Everyone clapped and cheered. She sat at a picnic table set up on the outskirts of the party with a bottle of beer.  

Why was she here again?

What was her purpose?

She watched Maria dancing with who Ruby assumed was her friend. Dressrosa was a warm island but Ruby felt cold. She sighed and sipped her beer. How rude would it be to leave the party without telling Maria?

“You look depressed, señiorita.” Ruby looked up from her beer bottle and stared at a handsome man smiling down at her. “Such a beautiful woman shouldn’t be sitting alone.” She huffed and rolled her eyes. The man took the opportunity to sit across from her. “Let me guess, your date has left you to be with another woman?” She didn’t answer him. “No? Perhaps your lover cheated and you’re here to get revenge?” She sipped her beer. “Again, no? Hmmm,” he hummed and scratched his chin. He snapped. “You’re on the run from someone! Come to Dressrosa to forget all about them! I’m right aren’t I, Sela D Ruby.”

Ruby’s eyes widened and she squeezed her bottle. She stared at the smirking man. “Who are you?” She demanded. 

“Not your enemy,” he said.

“Then who is?” 

The man looked to the side and stared at the castle. Ruby narrowed her eyes. “You’re quite the enigma,” he said. “We wanted you to join us but after the explosion we couldn’t find you.”

Ruby scoffed. “Revolutionaries,” she hissed. “You didn’t look very hard. There was a trail of blood.” The man was silent. “Why are you bothering with me now? I’m probably too fucked for you guys now.”

“Because we’re after the same thing.” Ruby said nothing. “I didn’t expect you to be so far from your captain but it seems he really did send you away.”

Ruby huffed. “That’s one way of putting it.”

“We’ve been tracking your progress and we’ve tried to keep the government off your trail.”

“ Why ?”

The man cocked his head. “Didn’t I just say we want the same things? Plus, if you truly are on the run from your captain, then it would be easier to convince you to join our cause.”

“I’m not interested in a cause,” she said and sipped from her bottle. “If you wanted me to join you and believe in that cause you should’ve followed that blood trail.”

“Then how about a place to stay? Going from a ship to a-”

“I’m not-!” She grimaced. “I’m not on the run from him,” she whispered. “I’m here to-”

“Feed him information?” She chewed on her lip. “What if I told you that we want to deal with all this before he even reaches the island?” 

Ruby stared at him. “Why did you approach me?”

“The way I see it, you don’t care who deals with the situation as long as you and him come out okay.” She sipped her beer. “If we take care of it, then you both come out unscathed and can go about your lives. Or you can join us. Whatever.”

Ruby sighed. 

“Elissa!” She heard Maria call. Ruby looked over to her. 

“Don’t worry about answering me now. I’ll come find you.”

“Wait, how-?!” She blinked and he was gone. “Piss,” she groaned. 

“Elissa,” Maria breathed as she ran up to her. “Were you just talking to someone?”

“Just some pervert thinking he could take me home,” Ruby said with an eyeroll. “What did you need?”

Maria grabbed her hand. “Let’s dance!” She laughed and started to pull Ruby along. 

“I don’t know how!” Ruby said. 

“Come on! That doesn’t matter!”

Ruby chuckled lightly, allowing Maria to drag her along. 

“Any new developments?” She heard Law’s flat voice ask. 

Ruby swallowed. “I haven’t found anything yet if that’s what you mean,” she said as she stood naked in her flat. 

He sighed. “I see.” He sighed again. “I’m really starting to regret sending you there.”

“Starting to?” She questioned. “You regretted it since I brought it up,” she said, slightly annoyed. 

He was silent for a moment. “What’s wrong?”

“What?”

“What’s wrong?” He repeated. “You’re being pissy.”

“I’m not-” she took a deep breath. “I just miss everyone. Sorry. I don’t mean to take it out on you.”

“Everyone misses you, too,” he said. “Me included.”

For some reason that didn’t comfort her like it should’ve. “Law?”

“What?”

“Do you love me?”

He was silent. She could hear him breathing. “Why would you ask that?” He sounded hurt. Guilt immediately settled into her chest. 

“Sorry,” she sighed. “I’m just not feeling well.” She sat on the bed.

“Get some rest,” he said. “You need to be at your best.”

“I know.”

“And there was nothing else? No development?”

Ruby swallowed, thinking about the revolutionary and whatever information they already had. “No.”

“Okay,” he breathed. “Have a good night. Love you.”

Ruby sighed. “I love you, too.”

Ruby dropped the receiver and let it hang off the den den mushi , the dial tone loud in the small room. She stared into the dark flat before covering her face with her hands, starting to silently sob in the lonely room. 

#one piece #op fanfic #lawxoc #law x oc #x oc #side to side #sela ruby #ruby sela #UNRELIABLE NARRATOR BEAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #one piece fanfiction

[pettyrevenge-base]

I ruined my coworkers first chance at a vacation in 3 years.

My coworker and I share a space. She has been there 3 years, myself 5 months.

She is not my boss but constantly looks over my shoulder, telling me how to change my work. She is rude to the people we work with overseas online. She does it all on speakerphone and ignore me when i ask her to use a headset while she yells at them. She talks about her stomach problems and her issues pooping. When I ask her not to she tells me to get over it. If another coworker comes to speak to me she answers for Mr and over me.

She also swears at her computer, verbally responding to emails she doesn't like. Talks over her breath while reading her work constantly.

I told her many times to please stop and she got pissed saying she doesnt 'jump to.my tune' and complains of having to ' walk on eggshells around me' as she isnt accustomedto modifying her behaviour for anyone.

The company is tiny, the owner insanely, pitifully cheap. So I'm thr first person in years that is able to cover her work. She is desperate for vacation and recently booked a long trip to Hong Kong for 2.5 weeks.

She doesn't know yet I was recently offered a way better full time job through someone I've worked freelance for in the past. My freelancer is understanding if I was to wait a bit before i end my current employment as my coworkers holliday is in 2 weeks.

But I think I'll give my notice early. Our boss is a huge asshole and my coworker hates his guts and it should be an interesting fallout as if she goes on holiday and there is no one else who can do her job. She will have a total meltdown.

Source: reddit.com/r/pettyrevenge

#pettyrevenge #lol #omg

[vroomian]

I just read everything in your desert comic tag and am enthralled. Is there any piece of world building it that you like but haven't gotten a chance to share yet?

Oh! Nomads! Nomads are a clan of traders who travel outside of the rainy season, going from clan to clan, basically acting as a news network. They usually bunk down with various clans on a rotating basis. There are many small caravans, but there’s a ruler they answer too as well. None of the clans ever know who it is.

A harem isn’t called a harem, it’s called a household! So someone from a clan would introduce themself as clan-household-position-personal name. If they’re really religious they’ll add their god they worship after. So, “clan x, 1st wife of household blah, called Name, secant of God.” This only for first meetings and formal events though. Normal occasions just name and husband, or father if they’re unwed. Clan is usually obvious from their marks. Chiefs introduce themsleves name first always because they effectively are the entire clan basically.

1st wife clan has a tradition that a good wife is submissive to their husband in all things, and it’s kinda gross! They also cover the wife’s forehead because it’s solely for their husbands eyes.

Mc isn’t the first person from her family to fall into this new world. Her uncle went missing when she was a kid, and it turned out he also got portald! Unlike mc, uncle didn’t become a husband though — he became a wife, because he just didn’t have control cover his magic. He’s the only wife though because his magic is a lot, and his nomad husband (who’s a (female???)widower btw, and survived the loss of three wives in a particularly terrible swarm) gave up being a caravan leader just to focus on helping uncle not kill himself. They’re one of those old couples who radiated comfort when they’re together.

There are great festivals in the fall, just before rainy season where the clans who the eligible young adults would fest together, looking for compatible spouses. It’s generally a big party for singles or people looking to expand.

No one really has to care about relations outside of your immediate relatives (same father siblings, parent-child), because magic isn’t really genetic. If you’re too closely related, no spark will take no matter what you try. Genealogy isn’t really tracked.

Some clans treat wives as mere objects for the husband to use, but in most cases wives are extremely involved in the selection of new wives. It’s important for the people Ives to be able to hold the line if the worst happens to everyone in front of them.

It’s taboo for wives to sleep with anyone besides their husband, including their fellow wives. There are more than a few tragedy’s written about wives who fall in love with each other and forget their duty to their husband lol. Husbands can sleep with anyone they want though. The double standards are very real!

Because it’s a harem system, the kids have different names for the mothers! 1st wife is called Ama, 2nd is Shima, Eoma, Shuma, Dama, etc. A child would call their own direct mother Mama sometimes though. So thr child of the first wife may refer to their fathers second wife as Sima, and their own mother as either ama or mama. fathers are always Ada.

#you've got questions we've got answers #desert comic #world building

[hvuga]

   AMAE  —  JAPANESE

“To fall into the arms of your loved one."

TW: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH (MENTIONED), DEATH, ILLNESS UNIDENTIFIED, PTSD, INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS .

FINALLY!!! for fuck’s sake i was dying to finally post this one shot to SHM and my relieve to FINALLY post it was freeing. I’m so sorry to post this late for anyone who will read it; it is my first time as a non-native english publishing it, so i’m so sorry for thr bad writing and the error conteined here. 

ALL WRITING RIGHTS RESERVED © HVUGA 2022 | DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE OR CLAIM AS YOUR OWN. | DAYSLILY TEMPLATE | SASUHINA MONTH 2022 DAY #1: AMAE ; @sasuhinamonth

Reinstating himself in Konoha was a hard task, not because of the unwelcome aurea, but because of his discernment of the things that are meant to shelter his presence in the village. It took a long time for him to become accustomed again, and yet Sasuke was aware of every little thing that could be wrong for his senses, the discomfort and guilt in Sakura’s eyes never missed his sight, even silent, Haruno spoke louder than words, and Sasuke never wanted this mission if he knew the shit will hit the fan too soon without his presence.

The Uchiha District was a ghostly scene, and he never cared enough to make it otherwise, and something inside him hoped Hinata’s presence changed his perspective from the moment she became his wife. Yet, he knew it’ll be hard, for both of them adjusting in one house. He was still learning to be more open, for her, even if means dug in traumas he wasn’t fully recovered. He licked his wounds often he cost to admit to her, the unbearable feeling of being left to lift his own and his clan honor, and she is never upset for his habits, nor his resentment. Hinata just listened to him, with his large body clearly weighted against her tiny one, she embraced him as if he was her most prized possession, and the avenger let her, because it was the feeling of belonging that kept him sane.

However, the dread culminating through the damaged walls of the district telled him another side of the story: Hinata is drowning again. Sasuke discovered six months after starting dating her, when he felt the sun gradually losing its power when laid his eyes upon her, and for the first time in years his heart was pounding again with an aching worry about another person. He didn’t like the feeling then, and does not like it now. His feet dragged him on the way to his fianceé’s apartment, knowing damn well where she would be. He got the rhythm very quick after learning more about the Hyuuga, and was accustomed to finding her hidden through books, scrolls and some med-nin studies that he was sure she readed more than twenty times. This turn was not different, but the situation has gotten worse since the last time she lost her mind.

He knocked her door with a firm stance, imaginating she would ignore him for starters, and when he was about to do it a second time, the click called his attention, and blending with the darkness there was Hinata, or the shell where she was supposed to be living. Not a word came out of her mouth while both of them stood in the doorway, their eyes analyzing inch by inch of each other. Alas, Hinata was the one who could foresee all and everybody, and Sasuke was not saved by it. Instead of coaxing her into saying something, the Uchiha only let his fingers carefully trace around her features, the promising touch was not uninvited by the Byakugan princess, never was, but her flinching didn't help him think otherwise. "I'm home."

He said those words carefully, studying her reaction through his words, and one part of him lessened the tightness around when she got softer in her eyes. "Welcome home, love" Hinata replied, but it felt off, even if she tried to sound genuine. His fiancée was not there, not yet. Slowly, she made space for him to enter her home, and even if it sounds and appears to be messy, her apartment wasn't nearly as messy as Naruto's, if anything, it was more clean than his apartment. His feet followed her without hesitation, and just stopped when they reached the kitchen, where Hinata put her kettle on the stove and adjusted her tea set before them, but the words that came after made Sasuke suddenly forget his arounds. Hinata was looking at his face, but her white eyes didn’t reach his charcoal ones.  "I'm calling off the wedding."

"No." Like hell she was, Sasuke was incredulous, and he hoped his features showed this to her. Besides being a vehement statement, Sasuke knew she wouldn't do a thing like this before thinking, and that line of thoughts hurt more than his pride. The trouble in meeting his eyes standed for minutes, but he wasn't retiring, not until she gave a real answer. 

"Sasuke… Please" The fragility in her voice coolled his temper, he stepped back in his weariness, but he enquired for the truth, not buying this shit Hinata pulled off. He already was forming a possible scenário, most likely with that bastard of her father, and the click of his tongue sounded more resentful, startling her. Now, Hinata met his gaze, but the regret shined through them, and the urge to do something about it consumed him.

"I am not leaving until you show me what you are saying it's true. You’re not the Hinata I fell in love with, you are not like this." He spoke forcefully, trying to resonate with her, but he regretted as soon his words came out of his mouth. Hinata still has her backbone, as it seems, her next words boiling his blood. 

"That 's the thing! I'm not her anymore, she was already broken, but now is shattered! She doesn't exist anymore! I am certain that you don't want anything broken, and now-" And the final straw finally let go of his rage, upset at how little she thinks of herself, despite being the only person who was actually good. 

"Bullshit, that's the best you could come up with? On me, no less?" A bitter laugh ringed in her ears, and Hinata was back in the old habits of hers, stuttering and flinching, avoiding his gaze, making Sasuke click his tongue. He needed to stop himself before doing anything impulsive, especially in this conversation. But his honesty didn’t hold back, and he think is better like this, Hinata isn’t a baby and for fuck’s sake, she knows how to hold her ground.

“I’m protecting you, that’s the reason.” The answer she spitted made him lose his guard in the argument. “I couldn’t bear to live knowing that if you stay by my side, you’re gonna be dead, and I don’t want your blood in my hands, it’s enough. I’ve had enough!” Sasuke was speechless for the first time. Not surprised or shocked, but stalled by the words, because this was the first time that Hinata being selfless hurted him. Looking at his history, he was the one who should get distance from her, but he didn’t, all because of her. He was the selfish bastard who couldn't get enough of her. Hinata was shivering, tears spilling in her cheeks already red with the effort. His stomach dropped with worry, trying to come at her, to involve his woman in his arms, but she distanced herself, her head shaking with denial. "Please, just… go."

The former nukenin let his breath out of his mouth with resignation, his hips leaning into the counter, the serious expression finally in place. Sasuke reasoned with himself quite a lot, thinking ahead of his steps as if he was breathing. It came naturally after his hard life as a genin, and after that he made a survivor instinct. Now when he needed that skill, was thrown out of the window. But all that was unnecessary, as he watched with alarm the color drain of her face and before anything, he catched the Hyuuga in his arms, securing her to not fall, and the dazed look within her eyes told what he needed to know.

“You’re— Hinata, what happened? What happened in the hospital? Fuck, how long have you been—”   

“It's fine, happens every now and then. I’m literally a medic, Sasuke, I know how to take care of myself, okay? Don’t worry for noth-”  

“You literally fell on my arms!”

“And it is nothing! Go rest, you came from a mission…”

“For fuck’s sake, Hinata, shut your mouth and accept this help for you. I’m not gonna to leave you in this state!” He finished the argument and carried her bride-like through her room, and carefully, he deposited her in the bed, her neck dippin’ in the pillows with ease.

“Rough day, huh?” Scathing, Sasuke returned the topic knowing she would ignore him, but the fact she lacked to care for herself… It was shocking, but not unforeseeable. Hinata was a lioness when it comes to health, but only for the others, and he tired himself out trying to make her see the problem as he, and her other friends, saw it. 

Hinata remained silent, not very comfortable with him sizing her with care. After all, who is she to deserve it? Heavens, she was supposed to die but Neji thought she was worth it, that she could’ve changed the Hyuuga, but now look at her mess: she killed a child because the treatment she indicated didn’t work. Worse than that, she watched Kameko die in the same way she watched him, powerless, unworthy of everything. 

Why she wasn’t courageous enough to increase her dose, but the doubt always came in moments she needed the most, to be selfish, to be an horrendous sister and end it over in a minute. What in the world did she have, for Kami’s sake? Nothing, it would lessen the burden, for sure. But why not do it?

She was a fucking coward, that’s th—

“Was it Kameko? The little boy you're watching over for quite some time?” The blunt question woke her of the numb feelings, already tired of this, of everything. “Hina. . .”

“I killed him, Sasuke, I brought that pain for him, I let him suffer—”

“Hinata, you knew the case was strong, it’s not your fault, if anything, you tried your best.” He tried to sooth her, but the soulless look she gave to him made the words stop coming. 

“My best wasn’t enough.”

He caught her hand between his, his thumb caressing lightly her knuckles, the best comfort he could give to her, but he knew it would never ease. The mourn wasn’t anything but easy to face, and even along with truest people, this could turn in the  wrong direction in a blink of an eye. In his last effort, he sided her on the mattress, hand in hand, the words barely a whisper. “Do you want to talk about it?”

It ringed in the room with rueness, his own torment showing off in reflection of her emotions. He didn’t count how much time both were silent in their own world, but his ears perked at her breath released with chagrin. But he listened anyway, the minimal he could do it at the time. 

She was still trying to finish her tasks at the hospital, with anxiety blooming in her chest as the time passed by her and the environment. Lucky these days were calm, almost monotone, and the work for Hinata were just check-ups, and bureaucracy paperwork. The Hyuuga heir prides herself for being efficient at those times, it means she could go home early and have a little time with her soon-to-be husband. Between her position as heir of the clan and his work as special guard for the Hokage, Hinata didn’t see Sasuke as much as she wished for, even for the wedding preparations. He tries to stay longer, but the repayment (one thing both agree it’s useless) to the Village is eager to suck Sasuke’s guilt as an act of service. 

Bullshit. 

Being the only Uchiha alive (as far they know at the moment) turn out to be a political and hard matter to deal with, the elderly council is pressing the Hokage — Kakashi Hatake, the ex-Team 7 mentor — to do something about it even if they know the Uchiha is marrying her (her father don’t let them forget about this, always wanting the ex-nukenin in the prison and away from her). Sasuke is holding it all in his shoulders alone, dealing with every hassle existent even after his involvement with Hinata, when she asked to hold alongside with him, because it pained her how he came more hollow as the time passed, it was a huge mess itself and they didn’t think that was possible to worse the situation more. At moments like this, the raven haired man would detach from everybody, even Hinata, and doesn’t show his face for a week. He will do his work, but his loneliness will consume him little by little if no one dared to step up and help him out of the darkness. 

It was Hinata’s first time dealing with his PTSD, as a survivor and veteran of the war. She knew how her trauma worked out in harsh moments, but the single time she was unprepared to deal with his, she almost faced death. Sasuke tried to kill her, unadapted to discern her presence, and when she was able to restore her force, he was already on his knees, resolute to not look into her eyes, guilty darkening his features with sorrow and regret. He made her promise to not do that anymore, but she was silent all the way, still ringing his own pain instead of hers.

“I will never be at peace with myself again if I hurt you in any way” said the Uchiha for her, but she knows deep down the punishment got stuck in his mind. He was doing this especially for Naruto and Sakura, for his regret to be wash away with real actions, even if the Team Seven were more happy to have Sasuke with them as part of their dysfunctional family, they didn’t care enough about the sentence as long he was comfortable with it and was willing to do it — Naruto tried to convince him to break out and he would come with the story of his choice to stay in the shadows. The Uzumaki would deal with the council later, after all “these moaning bitches need to be replaced with people who lived enough to understand”, his words, not hers. — but the avenger refused so many times that ‘no’ became a second language for him. 

Her thoughts about seeing Sasuke early was quickly pushed in the back of her mind when Sakura’s screams were banging on her door, forcing her to move with the same despair that her friend expressed in her tone, understanding nothing until Kameko’s name jumped off Haruno’s mouth. 

Please, Kami, no.

Her heart accelerates on her chest, trying to process what is happening with him, reviewing what she did wrong, what she didn’t see, what she did to him to turn his state in so little time, Sakura hot on her heels right behind her, informing the situation. His illness was having the best of him, and even if the Hyuuga stabilizes before things get out of hand, she knew she will hurt him, disabilitate Kameko for the prior study of his case was an awful idea, even if Tsunade had agreed at the time, it was her — and only her — fault. She cannot bear to lose him, not for her mistake and not for his illness. 

Knowing with the palm of her hand the way, she made there in a record time, stomping at the door and already seeing TenTen and Shizune using their healing technique on the little boy, who is not responding right away, and her anxiety crawled on her lungs, difficulting her breathing, making her lips suck the air present, nothing really easing her mind. Invaded by regret, she activated her kekkei genkai, trying to look at the most damaged part to fix it. Her search lasted five seconds, before finally realizing it. Kameko was dying.

Hinata’s fingers were moving on the little boy tenketsus, liberating their points to alleviate his tensions, which closed itself, provoking his last decline. While TenTen healed his other parts, easing the pain and discomfort. Gradually his signs stabilized, leaving the four doctors breathing with discomfort for using too much chakra, but what woke Hinata of her numb state was his little hand grasped on her sleeve, two green deep eyes looking right at her soul with tired acceptance, hopeless. Not even an ounce of accusation, innocent eyes feeling all at the same time. When he finally spoke, the indigo haired woman refrained herself from speaking, to tell him to rest. It was ending soon, she would promise, please let me save you, she would beg. 

“H…Hina-cha..n'' Kameko mouthed with dim light of genuine happiness, Hinata blinked back the tears on her eyes, the lump on her throat making it impossible to digest her tears, when he tried to force more words to come out of his mouth, the soft and calloused hands of the princess lingered in his face, with a ghosted affection. Hinata noticed the pale skin and his dark bags, the signs of weariness he was suffering during the treatment. Another time, his little mouth tried to communicate with Hinata, and already feeling defeated by his stubbornness, the med-nin transferred some of her chakra, her fingers caressing his chin with affection.

“I…I’ll b…e good?” He voiced, his voice so weak that Hinata barely understood for a moment and inside, her heart breaking in little pieces, and she looked up to the white roof of the room, and when she gazed with a faint little smile, Hinata didn’t had the courage to say something more than a uttered “You’re gonna be fine, my little firefly” Then, Kameko smiled back at her, believing and drinking at her tiny string of hope. It pained her as much as seeing him get hurt from his medicines. 

Finally letting him rest properly before his meal, Hinata faced Shizune with a worn out expression, not daring to look into her sorry eyes, and left the room with long paces and her heart heavy with guilt. Coming to her safe space would bring some air to her thoughts, trying to resonate in solutions for him, all over again. She can’t let him have all this pain to himself. He’s nine, nine years old, she recalled with sorrow, and then other images filled her mind non-stop. 

One of them was his birthday at the hospital, how Kameko was feeble, and that day was especially hard for him, but her team made a little celebration for him, for his improvement, his progress in this never ending infirmity. He was so happy the moment he offered her a piece of his cake, explaining it was “a work of the two of them”, so she needed to eat the cake too. 

She cried all night long after this, knowing how much hurt he was, how he will never be able to come back normal after all the treatment. Hinata ruined his life.

She is worse than an assassin.

A few hours later, Hinata was called by Tsunade in her office, ice spreading to her spine, expecting nothing good from Sannin's lips. Reaching her door, the Hyuuga knocks three times before hearing the hoarse voice of Senju letting her enter the room. A sigh left her mouth without her permission, watching the medic with resignation and acceptance, bloodshot eyes and watery lashes inducing she already cried enough for the day. 

“Tsunade-sama, you asked for me?” Her own voice wasn’t in her steady tone, but Hinata tried to bulk up before her unprofessionalism showed any more in the conversation. After years living within the Hyuugas, the Byakugan princess knew almost every emotion after analyzing their posture, however, it wasn’t like the Senju were trying to hide her emotions, with an open facade and honesty flowing through her eyes. The reason for the meeting drowned her senses right after her question, and slowly drew her breath. Her stomach  finally drops with the response, and is becoming harder to not feel the shame, guilt building their way into her throat. She didn’t make it, she would lose again, and her brain couldn’t grasp the fact with lucidity.

“Dr. Hyuuga, I’m sorry for you to hear that, but Shizune notified me earlier that Kameko wasn’t responding to the medication after the episode you stabilized his vitals, and unfortunately, she reported his worsening about fifteen minutes ago.” The lump in her throat became unbearable at that point, it’s coming all over again. Tsunade attempted to ease the request behind the words, her grieving were clear after words came out of her mouth. Hinata only acknowledged her words — is useless, she knows, but now she needs it. “He was asking you, to read a story.” And she won’t deny his request, she never did.

Hinata was slowing her pace, as if not believing she was doing this. He was about to graduate at the academy, just to be taken away from a disease, one that haunts every person who knew about it. Hinata couldn't be more disappointed and angry at herself because of that, she should have searched for more ways, more paths to follow that didn't need to let go of him. He was a child, for God's sake.

Her hand grew cold, afraid of facing his sweet face, to say goodbye to his smile, his eyes, his bright personality. Everything is remembering him. And trying to rip off the band-aid already, Hinata entered his room with a small smile, her eyes forcing the light to come out to brighten his day one more time. Gazing him on bed, Hyuuga was already his point of focus, showing true affection into his green eyes. On his side there’s a book, his appearance was old and too much readed through the years, but Kameko couldn’t care less about it, drawn to its words like it was the very first time. 

“You’re fulfilling your promise, a‘ight?” 

“Of course, firefly, I will never forget it” He made an effort to make space for her, and gracefully Hinata sat at his side, the book in her hand ready on the page. Hinata slipped her fingers through his hair, feeling his little body fit perfectly to her side, in a one-arm-embrace. Hinata read out loud the title with an uttered voice, soothing his heart pace. “The Solitude of the Winter.”

“There’s a time when the seasons lay upon the earth, particularly to watch how their work was advancing through the months, and alongside the humans, they lived as kings and queens. Each one of the four were tamed by how they decided to treat their people. The least connected with their sprout was Winter, the god is nothing like the warm, bright and cozy companions, distancing himself off them was the best choice. He doesn’t trust his power nor his reactions to them, and it was better like this.” A little huff escaped from Kameko and Hinata rolled her eyes, playfully, understanding very well what the kid was implying. He is the god Winter now.

“Sometimes, his fellow animals — the ones who could survive the deadly coldness that revolves his powers — asked so many times what was the reason for that, but as the same amount asked, he responded with a simple “I would be the cause of their death.’” Hinata made a icy and soothed voice, representing the character, smiling a little seeing the admiration in Kameko’s eyes “and was left alone in his own habitat, the solitude being his faithful friend until the end. Deciding to live his year away from the others, the god choses a wide space in the mountains to live there and not have contact with the humans, and by choice, with the other gods. He had lived enough for six thousand years, always repeating the process. This time wasn’t different for him. Or so he thought.”

A little gasp of surprise from Kameko made Hinata fully see him at her side, his eager look faking it to make her laugh, working every time. “What happened then?” 

“Oh, you see… a little fugitive ran away from home, this girl was named Hima. She didn’t know what else to do, since her parents were consumed by hunger, and she didn’t want to live with his aunt, a severe woman who didn't like her at all. Climbing the mountain was the easy part, since she was so clever that every obstacle the god Winter put on her way was dodged. She slowly makes it to the castle’s entrance, enchanted by the intricate ornaments and ice sculptures, and when she was close to entering the place, Winter descended upon him, curious of how the girl survived all of his traps.” 

“She was destined to reach it. If the Fates would want her to do it, then she will do it in any way.” Kameko stated, and Hinata stilled herself to not cringe at his side, disturbed at how this brought all of her memories with simple words. How weak and affected by it she was. Him is all what she thought nowadays, even after two years passed. 

déjà vu. déjà vécu. déjà éprouvé.

Already seen, already lived, already experienced. 

Trying not to run off this conversation, Hinata regained her control and came back to her telling, distracting both of them with things that could hurt more than before. “Yes, but Winter thought differently at the time, feeling that this girl was like nothing from there and she doesn't belong to the misery. He tried to tell her that, so many times, it wasn’t safe for a girl like her to live there.” Told with a somber expression. Kameko rested his head on her shoulders at this moment, listening intently, his breathing calm as a breeze. Hinata knew the steps by now, just waiting for his first snore.

“And what happened, Hina-chan? What the god did?” 

“Step by step, Winter guides Hima through his castle, allegedly saying it was temporary, that she won’t survive within these walls, but she didn't seem to care, already feeling much better than her aunt's home. Oh heavens, what will he do now? Nothing scares the little girl, and the ancient deity was running out of ideas. Inside him, a little sparkle flew in her heart, not wanting to give false hopes to him, to grow fond of her presence. He cannot go on with this little game, he wasn’t warm and receptive as a father, Winter never was a father. The following days were filled with attempts of her to get to know him, but he bolted through the halls with the same idea of escaping a bonfire. It was welcoming at first, but if you are not careful and are diligent enough, you get burned into the fire. He is not willing to feel this sensation through his heart again.

Although, even trying his best to avoid the human kid, Winter didn’t obtain success. Hima’s efforts to carve a place in his heart were intriguing, and worked as fine as she wanted. Now, his heart and mind battled to set a verdict, he was conflicted by his own mind and ideals. The girl was earning her stay, doing what she could and couldn’t just thanking his help during these days. She woke up early to help in the chores, and she loved to see the castle build itself during her duties, especially when the lonely Winter was together, the magic was astonishing, making the feeling of leave almost pang her chest.

Unfortunately weeks later a tragedy happened, affecting primarily the energy in the environment. With sorrow, the god fell ill because of his lack of powers, it reached the pike as time of the year passed with a fastness unknown of him. In times like this, he never felt the disease consummate him, but the arrival of the girl and the feeling blooming into his heart, he was indifferent to the change, until the day. Hima won’t let him die like this, not when the seasons need him, and then she promised him she will find a cure, a way to save him like he saved her, days ago. So the girl gathered the things she needed to reach out the god’s companions, and bid her farewell with a longing pain, not wanting to leave the king alone. During her trip, the girl helped and searched in every corner she came across, but then just when she was close to find the first goddess, the Fall — closer to the Winter, and a very good friend —, the girl was ambushed by hunters and his dogs.” At the end of her sentence, Kameko was grieving for the little girl, and Hinata brought him to her arms, and peppered light kisses in his head, comforting him with caution, not wanting to make him more sad. And then, the idea came. “Then, with a leap of faith, the little girl cried for one of the three gods to help her, she touched Winter’s name, the Summer, the queen of the sun and the breeze, descended into the ambush and liberated the little girl with a flourish, disappearing with the two of them in a safe place, and during the time Hima was there, she hurried to explain the situation, and the goddess felt all the sorrow to finally understand the meaning of this, ashamed of her lack of action regarding his long lost friend. And rushed in her thoughts, the goddess finally gathered a cure for the god, leaving her hideaway with Hima at her side.”

Surprised and taken back by the change the kunoichi did with his story, Kameko searched for her eyes, pearl in jade, and when the hope glistened through them, Hinata put a half smirk, knowing the feeling. Then, the question came with a lightning speed. “They make it in time? They did?!”

“Yes, the king was surprised, and more than that, he felt the gratitude and finally let the love flow through his fibers, his words lost between the gratitude and the feeling of being whole again. Winter’s solitude was nothing compared to his new family, he was already at home. He didn’t need anything besides these two people. And from now on, Winter happily accepted Hima and the Summer as his, and vice versa.” The little cheer coming from Kameko eased up her lump, the heaviness forgotten for a few minutes. Imperceptibly, the child opened his mouth, not suppressing the yawn that came out and Hinata chuckled softly before tucking him in her arms. Two tiny arms were tight (or as tight an ill child could hold her) around her waist, and the Hyuuga watched the rise and fall of his chest carefully, heartbeat in her fingers drumming the last song, playing alone ‘till the end of the concert, leaving the only mark he could do. And Hinata felt everything and nothing. 

“For what is worth in those months, Hinata-chan, you did everything that could help. You’re a good person, an even great doctor, okay? Please, be safe.” Sakura’s words ringed through her ears, but were like air, already leaving and doing no good. But she won’t blame her friend, she will never do that, because her heart was carrying another duty: overprocess and overthink. She had done that a lot.

The worst part always came after, it wasn’t a matter of how, but when. She was familiar with the feeling haunting her what-ifs every now and then, because it was what the kunoichi of Konoha assigned for after the Great War. They cannot complain about the work, because it was a collateral effect. Death was a collateral effect. That doesn’t mean that it won’t hurt every time, because the life on their hands was counting on them to live for, to continue their days after. Hinata knew this like a mantra, living in her head and triggering bad habits she already controlled. Alas, her decline came from time to time, knowing very well where to attack, for the longest time haunting her dreams, using this as the images fill her up in the wrong times, depriving her of sleeping — it was useless, after all — and instead of searching for help for herself, she did the other way around: living in the hospital, trading every shift Ino, Sakura or TenTen was willing to give to have some rest. It was the only time she could take her mind off everything, and if that improves her effect on the life of her patients, she gladly does it.

The Byakugan Princess didn’t feel proud of this, but it is a good thing she was still there to help. So many people were needing this, even if her heart sank at the some cases given to her — helpless cases, like Kameko’s —, Hinata tried to put a smile on her face, to endure courage on some of her patients, principly the children. They were in her area of specialization, whose mostly light cases, but the minor parts of the same cases evolve to graves, and she proceeds along with Sakura, being the head of operation. It becomes the problem here, when she has to look in those bright faces and after that, crush their little faith with the results. 

Hinata was never ready to say goodbye to such young faces, after some time, fighting their battles became harder, with zero results or solutions, her despair led her to dark places, and a break is required, but does little to her peace of mind. It wasn’t enough, she wasn’t trying harder enough, even if Tsunade recognizes her efforts to new paths. She wasn’t saving anyone, and her failure was a shame on her history. 

After her last case, she burnt out as she left his room, her mind a fucked up mess. It got stuck on her heart, how easily a life slipped through her hands, when she was there to help, if she were an genius, like Neji, she would solved the case in a bat of an eye, because Neji knew everything, because Neji were logical and persistent enough to seek every recurse that existed in the Land of Fire. She didn’t bother going to work, receiving a three-days pass from Tsunade. But after this low blow, Hinata felt the duty upon her to not repeat the same mistake again. No one will die in her hands anymore. 

She forgot, for three days straight, her life outside her apartment, her head between books, scrolls, and everything she found promising to her search. In seventy-two hours, her eyes never met the darkness or a good time to sleep, completely awake, and afraid to meet her dreams and see something she won’t be able to get off her mind. To see his disappointed face, and how unequal both of them were, how he wasted his life to see her fail in every aspect of her life, trying only for him. 

Neji’s life was taken away by mistake and now she has to live upon his expectations, never meeting to honor his legacy. And now, along with her cousin, Kameko's weary and hopeless facade was impregnated on everything her eyes land, not trusting them to be lucid. 

Well, it’s not like she wouldn’t welcome madness as an old friend. 

The lump at his throat didn’t let him say all the things he wanted to say to her, because he wouldn’t know if words would be enough for her. Her fragile demeanor was back again, and his arms reached for her at the exact moment she leaned into him, trusting, as if he could save her. In his mind, Sasuke shook his head with the irony of the things. His hands were dirty with the blood of people he thought was unworthy, her — unwilling — were carrying the blood of people she couldn't save, but she did everything to do so. Finally finding his words, Sasuke made her lock her pearled eyes on his onix ones, the seriousness in his tone not leaving for nothing. 

“This world doesn’t deserve someone like you, Hyuuga, that’s what I think of it. You did everything in your power, the disease got the best on that day, but it didn’t wash your effort to do so.” Hinata tried to protest, tears filling her gaze, and his thumb glided gently in her bottom lip, not wanting to hear another word. It was his time to do something to her. “Don’t you dare correct me, you know — deep down — it is true. You’re fucking amazing, Hinata. You did it every single time, you don’t need to be a hero, you saved more lives than most shinobi living on this earth, recognize this as your worth. Some people sadly will go away, but it’s not your fault, and it never will be your fault. Put this in your head, little by little if you want, but without you, many of us couldn’t make it ‘till today, be proud.” 

The look in her eyes made his heart pang with anguish. Admiration was never good on him at any kind of moment, and Hinata looking at him like this didn’t help at all. If he told her about the darkness living underneath his skin, would she still look at him as she is right now? Or be with him, at some point? He was tainted, and brushing her with his guilt and sins was never an option. Sasuke tried to ignore all of this, changing the turn of the conversation where it was supposed to be. On her. And he never failed to foresee the things about Hinata. 

Eyes heavy, her breathing becoming even while she was holding his waist. He knew what was coming, and smirking slightly at her, the former criminal just kissed her forehead, his lips whispering soothing at her hair. “Sleep. I'll fight the bad dreams off if they come to get you.”  Hinata didn't have to be told twice.

#sasuhinamonth2022 #shmonth2022 #shmonth #hvuga #day 1 #amae #what a ghostly scene #sasuhina #ffnet #★ ── talia writes

[canadiancryptid]

Just watched Across the Spiderverse! That was amazing! Now I can stop avoiding spoilers like the plague!

Definitely gonna want to watch that again soon. There was a lot to take in, and a combination of a late show and a poor sleep schedule left me less than 100% awake, sadly. Not that I mind an excuse to see it nore than once! Gonna love that when I wake up.

Loved the combination of all the animation styles for the different universes.

Since I've had to dodge spoilers left and right, let me put more of my tired thoughts below the cut, for anyone who hasn't seen it yet. They're probably not gonna be in chronological order, but whatever.

- Renaissance Vulture had such a cool animation style. Loved him. Want to see more of the DaVinci notes style animation. That's awesome.

- The Spot is just... *chef's kiss.* He's the perfect blend of goofy joke villain and genuinely terrifying. And he looks like he's a living scetch covered in ink blots, which was such a cool design.

- "Being Spider-Man is easy!" The confidence of this man is unreal. Pavitr is in for a rough time and he has no idea. He does not seem to realize how badly the universe wants to kick him in the nuts because of his new job. Once it stops collapsing like a whiney 3 year old because it didn't get to murder a cop. That's still a thing that never got fully resolved. Hope that works out at some point.

- Peter B. is such a proud dad. Mayday is adorable. Him showing baby pics to everyone with a pair of eyes and trying to get Miles to hold his little bundle of joy was the most wholesome thing. Probably shouldn't be taking your baby to somewhere like that, but she seemed happy. And adorable.

- If all these Spider-Men are just... hanging out in the Spider Society, are they just leaving their universe without its Spider-Man? How is that not causing problems? How often do they have to go home? Gwen says she's been gone for months... and clearly didn't want to go back.

- Spider-Punk was... a lot. Loved him, but honestly had a hard time keeping track of everything during his introduction. There was just a lot going on on there, so my overtired brain had trouble taking it all in. One of the reasons I want to see it again. His whole visual effect was super cool, but... again, want to take it all in when I'm more awake. Think I read somewhere that he overthrew the government? Anyways, loved his vibe, but his colage-like effects did a number on my brain. Hobie seems cool.

- Miguel seems a little... not okay. He looked like he was gonna just straight-up EAT the Vulture instead of sending him home. And he keeps blaming Miles for starting everything, as if he CHOSE to get biten by that spider. Love him, even if he's seemingly starting to lose it.

I just found out there was a post credits scene with him in the first movie when I was trying to double check everyone's names. How did I not know this? He seemed a lot more well-ajusted there. Or at least less crazy. Taking that much weight onto his shoulders must have done quite the number on him.

- Canon Events leave me with so many questions. Since her dad is still alive, Gwen clearly hasn't had the whole "police capitan dies saving a child" event yet, and if he's gonna quit... does that mean that event won't happen? Is that enough to keep him safe? Is she gonna get close to the new captain and have them die? Is her dad still gonna die? Did she just accidentally skip that Canon Event, dooming her entire universe? Or is it not that big a deal?

- How much of the damage we saw was done by Miles saving the captain and not by the Spot? It looked more like the Spot's portals than it did glitchy multiverse rules. Or did Miles just amplify what was already there? If the Spot WASN'T messing everything up, would the damage have been nearly as bad?

- Wait, if the Spot was an anomaly, then how was that a Canon Event? Was something else supposed to happen? Or does the universe just take whatever excuse it can get to force these things to happen and throw a hissy fit if something stops it from happening?

- If Earth 42 doesn't have a Spider-Man, it can't have Canon Events. How is it still in one piece? Is having a Spider-Man created by a spider from that universe enough to keep it together? Or did Miles' dad dying happen as a Canon Event dispite the lack of a Spider-Man to screw with?

- If there wasn't supposed to be two Spider-Men in his universe, and the original Peter died, why does Miles still get forced into Canon Events? I feel like most of the questions I'm asking are either answered with a simple "because that's how the plot works", or it's gonna be super relivent in the next movie. I like overthinking stuff, it helps me sleep!

- Speaking of overthinking stuff to help me sleep, I'm gonna go do that. I'll probably update this with more thoughts in the morning, but its already a miracle I'm still awake.

#across the spiderverse #spiderverse #spiderverse spoilers #cryptid says stuff #animation #way to tired to articulate my thoughts well

[spells-and-liquid-luck]

yay! would you do loki's daughter basically inducing herself into a magical coma after infinity war because she was devastated by his death, but the coma sh put herself in basically lets her live out the life she dreamed of in her mind and basically when the avengers figure out they can go back in time, they have to wake her up and she's just very disoriented. she's really close to hawkeye though and even after he kinda went all rogue he still cares a lot for her and treats her kinda like a daughter

Sorry for the wait, but I hope that you enjoy this. I'm really grateful for anyone who takes the time to read these 💕

A World Like She Knew - Loki's Daughter Reader

The picture of Thor with tear stained eyes telling her that her father was gone has replayed in her mind for days now. At this point, all she wanted was to escape to a place where nothing could hurt her anymore. She wanted to not only silence her mind, but to shut out her entire world. So, there she was surrounded by migraine-inducing white walls and sitting up on a bed that looked as comforting as a stiff board, but yet still inviting. She placed the needle swiftly and painlessly into her skin and she watched the liquid contents trail down the tube and into her veins. She let the medium sized fluffy pillow cradle her head. As one tear trailed down her sleep deprived face , she closed her eyes and fell asleep. The coma was supposed to completely knock her out and leave her dreamless, but instead this coma transported her mind to a completely different world. This world was familiar to her. She had only ever seen it in her dreams. She turned to thr right of her at the sudden sound of pans clanging together. She squinted her eyes in confusion as she walked in a cautious manner unsure if this was a nightmare or maybe it could just be a dream that her brain refused to wake up from.

"Hey you're back early." A familiar voice said. It couldn't be. This isn't real. She thought to herself that this was just mistaking someone else's voice for his due to the grief that had eaten up her soul. She looked up to where the voice was coming from and her eyes nearly popped out of her skull. "Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked while standing among a small pile of dishes with a hand towel draped over his left shoulder. "Um, where am I?" She questioned, the confusion still washing over her face. He laughed and looked as if she had just told him a very strange joke. "You're home, silly. Here I made you something. Eat it. You look famished." He handed her a chocolate chip muffin and began to eat one as well. She took it as she continued to stare at him in utter disbelief that he was actually standing in the same room as her. She remembered Thor saying that he was dead, but yet here he was eating a chocolate chip muffin that he had make himself in a kitchen that she had never actually been in before. How could this be? She was on the verge of hyperventilation, when she was suddenly pulled out of her thoughts by her fathers hand resting on her forehead. "Are you sure that you're okay?" Maybe you should sit down. He offered her a chair with a worried look. "I'm just— I'm fine." She replied as she sank on the wooden chair. The sudden silence was suffocating to say the least. Was she really dreaming or was this all real? Her brain began to slowly adjust to this world as she got lost in her thoughts that Loki soon pulled her away from. "Do you want to see something?" Loki asked with a warm smile. She looked at him with a questioning glance but followed him anyway. He led her to a room. Her room. It was decorated most beautifully. The color of the walls were a comforting green and the scent was of fresh linen that really made it feel like home. The furniture was exactly how she imagined it would be. "I know you wanted the room painted. The original color was a bit too..downright horrific as you had put it." Her father said with a light chuckle. She looked at the unfamiliar yet familiar room, but couldn't recall when she had that conversation with him. Maybe it just didn't stay in her mind. She had only seen this place in her head. Like a daydream, but this didn't feel like a dream. It felt real— almost too real. Was this real? The idea of being her was cathartic, so why not enjoy it. Don't question it. This is a reality that was better than any feeling that she wanted to chase away. What was that feeling again? She tried to remember but the smell of the room kept bringing her away from whatever she was thinking. She didn't quite remember exactly why she wanted to be here in the first place. All she knew was that she could breathe without it hurting. She could live without the pain in her chest.

"Time travel?" Tony and Natasha questioned in unison. The avengers were in a circle discussing the subject. "Is that really possible?" Bruce asked in disbelief. "You're the scientist" Tony replied in his usual snaeky tone. "So we can save Loki?" Thor chimed in with hope radiating off of his face. "Yes, we can. Speaking of where'shis mini at?" They all looked around for her, but she wasn't there. "I'll look for her." Hawkeye volunteered and sped out of the room. He eventually found her and he saw what she had done to herself. His face dropped. She was frozen still and she had injected herself with something that he couldn't quite identify. He quickly ran to her and checked her vitals. "Thank God she's still alive He whispered to himself. He wasn't sure how to wake her, so he ran to get someone who hopefully could.

"Bruce!" He yelled as he ran through the halls. "She's put herself into some kind of coma." He finally said breathless and he reached them. The avengers all stood wide eyed as Bruce quickly ran to her aid. "Do you think you can get her to wake up? Hawkeye asked. Bruce sighed. "It seems to be magic. I can do everything that I can, but she has to either come to herself, or get a little help by making her realize wherever she is at is not real." They all looked a little confused. "What does that mean?" Hawkeye asked. "It means she's stuck in a dream-like state that caters to her wants. It's like being in a dream that you never want to wake up from." He explained. Thor sighed and put his hands on his head. "All we can do is wait." Bruce finished.

She was absolutely loving her home. Being with her father and living joy she had always wanted to. She had completely forgotten how she ended up here, but she didn't care. "In order to properly use telekinesis, you have to picture the item going to you and concentrate on that. Picture it in your mind first, and then it will be your reality." She was currently practicing her skills with her father. She was just as talented as he was, but he'd always say that she was more gifted. The green apple that she was currently fixated on from across the room soon made its way to her. She smiled up at him. "I did! I actually did it.!" Loki looked at her with a proud expression. "See you can do anything that you set your mind to. You're my daughter after all."

"Can you hear me?"

"Are you listening?"

"If you can hear me, please wake up."

Those words sounded like echoes deep inside of her brain. She squinted and touched her temples with her fingertips. "Are you alright?" Loki asked. "If it's too much practice, I think we should quit for the day." His voice suddenly sounded like it was coming from miles away.

"Huh?" Was all she could say in her dizzy state.

"Please wake up. I know you can do it."

"Just listen to my voice."

This voice became much clearer than her fathers mow and she began to pay more attention to it as she realized who this voice belonged to. "Hawkeye?" She muttered. "I really think you should lay down for little bit." Loki said trying to get her attention back on him. "Hawkeye." She said again. Her surroundings began to distort as she began to come to. She closed her eyes as if she was about to pass out, but instead the sound of beeping was heard.

"You're awake." Hawkeye mumbled with a smile of relief. "I'll go get the others. We have things we gotta do. It's urgent and we need you healthy." He got up briskly and went to fetch Bruce.

"Where am I?" Where's my father?" She asked with irritation as Bruce walked into the room. "You don't remember?" He asked in astonishment. "I just saw him. He was with me. Everything was perfect." She began to panic.

Hawkeye quickly came to her side. "Sweetie, your dad is gone, remember? The only reason why you're here now is because I kept talking to you in hopes that you'd wake up." Hawkeyes spoke with so much care in his voice as he reached for her hand. Out of everyone, she trusted him the most he treated her like a daughter, and the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her or set her off in anyway. She blinked a couple of times processing what he just told her and wiped a few tears off of her face. Everyone stayed quite for a few minutes as a way to let her process her emotions.

"We can change that, though" Tony said with sudden enthusiasm. "We need your help to get him back." She carefully sat up still feeling a little dazed. "How is that?" She questioned.

They all looked in unison at each other and said in unison.

"Time travel."

Tag list: @flamey-0

#Loki #Avengers #Loki's daughter

[ramu-ego]

bing bingbing hey hey hey!! woahhh your love 4 ego is unmatched LMFAOO, i’d never really thought much abt him but mayhaps your blog may change my mind !!! (you still get 2 be his top wifey though)

OHH!! my top 5.. it’s hyoma, seishiro, rin, reo & isagi! (not in any order but hyoma’s up there!!) funnily enough, WE R ON THE SAME FIRST IMPRESSIONS FOR RIN!! at first i was all “Man emo chars are so lame” THENN MY HATRED TURNED INTO AN OBSESSION LFMAOOA .. U RIGHTT I KNOW RIN WAS ON AUTO PILOT.. aint got a single thought in that stupid brain of his

THR FIRST ONE TO CATCH MY ATTENTION WAS HYOMA!! my friend sent me him, told me his nickname “princess” and said i would like him — i have a weakness LOL .. i feel like he’d produce such pretty reactions ?..!!?! the bath scene made me. kick my feet for unholy reasons!! THE SELFISH REASONS IS SOOO REAL OF YOU (i love being unapologetically mean to subs it’s entertaining in a way)

the fic sneakpeek with rin already has me running laps imm so excited HHAHA !! you bet once you post i’m running to that post as quick as possible! already loving how many thoughts and hcs you’re putting on this blog!!

hmm, not too sure how to end this.. any thoughts on your mind? or how’s your day been, depending on timezones! - 💌

OH I FELL FOR HIM THE SECOND I SAW HIM-

-Ego is....very much my type. Painfully my type. If you saw a majority of my other fandom husbands then...Ego's in good company 😂 (said he was ugly then seconds later was head over heels) And I will always be indignant about his treatment in the fandom! Especially from manga readers!! I'll let anime only watchers slide bc he's...rough, for a while. But anyone who reads the U-20 game and still thinks he doesn't care is just being willfully ignorant. Ego went full blown dad mode in that second half of the game and I have yet to recover from his dilf energy coaching that game 😤

seriously though was ready to hate Rin like I hated a few other characters bc fanon personality was shit. Total ick. Was literally tired of seeing his face and I didn't even know what bllk was. But then his little scenes kept building and then the U-20 game happened and now...all I wanna do is make him worse 🥰

Chigiri goes in the Bachira/Kunigami box like...is it legal to not like them?? Are there really fans who hate Chigiri bc hello??? Pretty pretty princess but also will not stop laughing at the weird Reo/Nagi fanclub that just formed around Chigiri. The off the wall friendships in bllk kill me and both Reo/Nagi being fans of Chigiri in their little England team is still killing me. The bath scene though, if they cheap out on Chigiri's thighs I (and a few others) will be rioting. Give!! Us!! The!!! Thighs!! and the rest of the stupidity that happens in that blessed scene istg

GAH I'M SORRY THE RIN FIC IS ON HOLD- A certain someone (they know who they are <.<) Gave me the worst idea for Niko and well...dragging my pussy across my keyboard horny writing a Niko fic I never thought I'd write bc I thought Niko was an ugly little mother fucker (yes I see the irony in thinking Ego is drop dead gorgeous but the other bowl cut ugly...shh) But not to spoil anything but it may or may not be bc of the previous nipple headcanon post and the delightful idea of male lactation and chapped boy nips 🙏

Thoughts...it's 6:40 am and I've barely been up for an hour power slamming some coffee down my gullet before I start the day. Thoughts blank except survive the day and avoid a toddler tantrum like I'm defusing a bomb 😂 But also to make plenty of time to write for horny boys 🍑 Lemme play the uno reverse card! How have you been? Enjoyed last weeks bllk episode? Are you a dubbed or sub watcher? Favorite part in the manga thus far? Any characters you wanted to see more of or weird side characters that just interest you??

#im drowning in bllk love obviously but my ever lurking love for fire force is sulking in the shadows #feel like that spongebob meme where he's looking at two different books #me rn @ my two fav husbands but then with a third eye staring at rin #i need to know who his VA will be its killing me T^T #:: thanks for the ask~! ✩ #:: 💌.anon~! ☆

[rainswept]

ngl i had to take a fat nap after that response ☹️

i have genuinely never felt so overwhelmed with emotion before, now we're in the same boat because i don't even know what to say to tell you exactly how much i enjoyed reading all of it. i got that whole eyes burning going on n shit and im having a very fun awesome time trying to put a name to whatever the feeling in my chest is (not), but love sounds like a nice way to put it so we'll go with that! i love you too, and appreciate the time you took to write everything out more than any sentence can convey the full meaning of

you're right about me not expecting my ask to mean so much, i wrote it because i knew most authors (and creators as a whole) like hearing how their viewers discover their work. you said you were curious in the notes of the url post, i thought i might as well send in my story to satisfy.

it would be a big step for me, but also a chance to say something nice to someone who inspired me and then move on after a “thank you” or vague acknowledgement to… prove to myself interacting isnt as bad as i thought it'd be?? something like that. i’m not sure what i wanted you to say, or how i wanted to feel about it

bbuut as per usual, you managed to surprise me no matter what i was looking for ( ‾́ ◡ ‾́ ) and it wasn't all over the place or hard to understand at all. my turn to be dramatic:

“what is the point of feeling if, as soon as you pry your eyes away from the page, the emotion fades with the ink?” is definitely a question i connect with. impressionable teenager check ‼️

i said i want to love like you because the way you dedicate yourself so completely is something i’ve never been able to do. i wasn't into picking apart characters before because i thought it was obsessive.

they aren't real right? who cares? which leads me to the metaphor i used for your writing: wholly consuming. imagine not being able to delve into those depths. of course it feels uncomfortable to be pulled under the waves at first— you aren't going to be able to breathe— but the underwater life has so much to offer. i know it now, because i’ve seen that unknowable infinity in your work and in your passion. and there's so much more to sea (ba dum tiss). thank you so much for showing me that

love changes a lot of people. it is sacrifice, and you often have to make compromises. so why not let myself be devoured by that endlessness? i would rather suffer, be swallowed by the ocean and have all of my soft edges filed into jagged pieces by the currents than to have never known that pain at all. because it changed me. i want to remember that.

i want to remember your words, and the part you played even if i am left with only hurt, because love is also giving. it's greed knows no bounds. it's scary, the only thing i had to offer was myself and my experience. but it's getting easier. i’m happy to be seen as a member of your audience, and will applaud every success long after our interests no longer align because that is my compromise for you ♥(ˆ⌣ˆ)

hope all that makes sense. i like the umbrella tag! i’m being perceived and i haven't exploded (yet) (destruction is imminent) ☂️

ANON i am so sorry for the late response i had to process this. i’m having such a hard time posting these bc i just want to keep them treasured in my inbox forever ugh

long post again

ANYWAY. you’re so poetic this is insane. hello???//?/? when i first saw this there were tears in my eyes literally. i cannot. the first paragraph. actually all of them. i . died?? goodbye?? this is the end of me as i know it. i will never be the same. these r the most impactful words anyone has ever said to me i think. i have no words. genuinely no words i’m going to melt into thr floor. plea. please. spare me anon. spare me. i’m in agony right now ur writing is so beautiful. ANONNNNN😭😭😭😭😭😭 god i will never recover. i am in tears

“i said i want to love like you because the way you dedicate yourself so completely is something i’ve never been able to do. i wasn't into picking apart characters before because i thought it was obsessive. they aren't real right? who cares?”

i get that, in a way. but as you said — “which leads me to the metaphor i used for your writing: wholly consuming.” — that’s how it feels to me, too, and it always has. i get the idea of thinking something isn’t important because it’s not real, but i’ve always latched onto them regardless. so i had to write, honestly. to get it out. because otherwise it would consume me instead. it sounds very dramatic, i’m aware, but it’s true — i have so many feelings surrounding these fictional pixels and stories and they have so much to offer and they take up too much space in my brain and if i do not talk about it i will Explode ™️. Or Implode ™️. so i write! because i want to. because i have to. because otherwise it will Swallow Me Whole. and i’d rather embrace it! i’ve always been an ‘obsessive’ person when it comes to interests — it’s all or nothing for me. so it’s one or the other — i can drown or i can swim, but i can’t really get out of the water of my own volition,,, and i’d rather not drown. so i’m both glad i inadvertently introduced you to that way of seeing things, and regret it, because it does hurt sometimes. but it’s worth it to me, and it seems like it is to you too, so that’s good!

ONCE AGAIN i could copy and paste this entire ask and comment on it but i fear it’ll just be me repeating your sentences and gawking at them and it would get way too long. 😭😭😭😭 so i’ll just let your ask speak for itself

“i’m being perceived and i haven't exploded (yet) (destruction is imminent) ☂️” also we can explode together actually. i’m glad u allowed urself to be perceived because. oh my god. 😭😭😭😭 this ask changed the trajectory of my life forever. half joke. destruction is not imminent you’ve got this

also, you’re definitely more than just a member of my audience now, in my opinion. if you do decide to stick around (and i hope you do), i hope we can become friends eventually too! even if you decide not to, these interactions have meant more to me than you know! so thank you, either way

#☂️ #—crow’s nest. #i love this ask. so mucj #i would totally comment on every paragraph you sent because they’re all. so touching and beautiful and #AUGH #i’m all over the place i’m so sorry 💀💀 #so much more to sea…. #and they’re a comedian #best anon ever actually. ur so cool i’m so glad to have u here #i win in life

[outfitandtrend]

[ad_1] Who says that board games don’t have an impact on popular culture anymore? Certainly not Netflix, as the beleaguered streaming giant finds itself in the midst of yet another crisis following news that a Stranger Things Monopoly game has made details of the show’s upcoming fourth season public. Per The Hollywood Reporter, series creators Matt and Ross Duffer, had a “total meltdown” when they were informed about what happened.According to Twitter users, the game could be found at some Target stores, which are stocking a considerable amount of show merch in advance of the fourth season. An April Reddit thread included a user claiming that they had bought the game “fair and square” at a large retailer. “Nobody stole it; nobody leaked a sample.” Another thread reacting to the news indicates something similar, claiming that some stores had the game stocked on shelves but would not let people purchase them yet.There is a pretty lengthy history of movie tie-in toys spoiling plot details, with details like the ending of Toy Story 3, the presence of aliens in the fourth Indiana Jones movie, and the gruesome kills of Michael Myers in 2018’s Halloween all being compromised. In 2021, a toy spoiled major plot points for the eagerly anticipated Star Wars: The Bad Batch TV series. According to THR, the product universe surrounding Stranger Things is considerably larger than any other Netflix title, making oversight a unique challenge.The new season is set to boast some of the series’ longest episodes to date, with two around the 90-minute mark and a finale that’s longer than The Dark Knight. So for anyone who’s not gassed on sitting still for pre-teen hijinks that long and would rather have the exact details spoiled, this Vulture piece contains a few of them.In a February press release, the Duffer Brothers called season four “the most challenging season yet” highlighting that it took “almost two years of filming” It’s also the series endgame, with the fifth being announced as the final, so it’s understandable why they’re so pissed about the Monopoly leak.Stranger Things’ fourth season will be released in two parts. Seven episodes will premiere on May 27, and the final two will be released on July 1. T [ad_2] Source link

#FASHIONFORMEN

[thebiscuiteternal]

I had an evil thought on twitter and way too many people encouraged it, SO-

“Collecting the Pieces”

Mild Horror, Family Secrets, Mental Instability, Magical Fuckups, Sangyao-lite, Nie Huaisang Doesn’t Know Yet, Jin Guangyao Is About To Know More Than He Ever Wanted To

__________

There is something wrong with Nie Huaisang.

It manifests in small signs at first.

Little things like how he would look at a person, but not at them, green eyes dull as if he wasn’t actually seeing who he was talking to. The unnaturally pale tint to his skin and the dark shadows under his eyes. The fact that his robes had gotten heavier over thr last several months, trying to hide that he was getting thinner.

The incident where he had lost consciousness in the middle of a discussion with Ouyang-furen and had only been saved from cracking his skull against the floor by the reflexes of his head disciple was… concerning. But like all of the other symptoms, it could easily be tallied up as exhaustion from lingering grief and having so much responsibility dumped onto an unprepared back.

But then...

Then there are the conversations none of them can hear. Those moments where he sits with his head slightly bowed, staring at nothing and lips moving silently.

There is something wrong with Nie Huaisang, and for those not of his sect, his presence has gone from mildly concerning to downright unnerving.

Jin Guangyao has to point out to his father more than once that they have only just averted the conflict with the previous sect leader; to bar the new one from the discussion conferences just because he seems strange would be an insult tantamount to inviting war, even if Nie Hengbai does seem to be doing all the talking for the Nie at the moment, his sect leader a quiet little shadow at his side.

He finds it a unique opportunity to observe, in fact. Everyone is so unsettled by the mere fact that Nie Huaisang converses with empty air that no one has apparently thought to find out what he is saying when he does .

The seating arrangement isn’t ideal. The only person besides his own disciples who doesn’t seem to be scared off by Nie Huaisang’s unnatural behavior is Jiang-zongzhu, who pointedly settles himself on the opposite side from Nie Hengbai and scowls at all gossipers, their host included. His height half-blocks Nie Huaisang from view.

But still, Jin Guangyao can see.

And as he watches the words fall unheard from Nie Huaisang’s mouth, he feels a chill slowly creep up his spine.

‘Da-ge, come back. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’ll behave. I'll be good. Please come back. Please, Da-ge…’

He is glad that his sleeves hide the involuntary clenching of his hands.

While he knows better than to completely dismiss a possibility, no matter how small the odds, his mind nonetheless rebels at the first idea to enter it. It cannot actually be Nie Mingjue's resentful ghost haunting his little brother. Even if it had been whole, if he and Xue Yang had not scattered it with the man's physical pieces, it is decidedly not Nie Huaisang that the man would be tormenting with his presence if he were capable.

Isn't it?

And yet, he cannot shake the cold in his bones.

There is something wrong with Nie Huaisang, and he will seek out the source.

---

"San-ge?"

Nie Huaisang blinks at him, eyes glassy and confused. He tilts his head questioningly like the birds he is so fond of, then slowly regains awareness of his surroundings and smiles, looking more like himself.

Jin Guangyao forcibly clamps down on a shudder. "It's good to see you, Sang-er," he says, allowing himself to adopt the regional address since they are nowhere near the judging eyes of Koi Tower. He reaches out and sweeps the younger man's hair out of his eyes, then tuts in concern. "Are you still not sleeping well?"

"Ah-" Nie Huaisang flinches and looks embarrassed at the gentle chiding. "It's… nothing, really. Busy times and too much paperwork, that's all. Can I get you anything?"

"I just need to look over some map records, if you don't mind. A handful of small sects have brought a problem to my father, and I'm afraid our own records are… a bit lacking."

The younger man simply nods, accepting the excuse at face value, and Jin Guangyao isn't sure if that says something about Nie Huaisang's state of mind, or the Jin sect's reputation for ignoring anything that isn't expenditures or debts to be collected. Either way, when Nie Huaisang reaches out to tug his sleeve, he goes willingly and tries to ignore the slightly unsteady sway to his friend's pace.

Even though the poor end to his relationship with Nie Mingjue had been loud and public enough that the whole of the Unclean Realms knew about it before the day had even ended, he is apparently still a familiar enough face that barely anyone pays him mind.

Indeed, most of their worried glances are directed towards their sect leader.

He refuses to examine the possible reasons why that might be settling sour in his stomach.

They are still a few halls and turns away from the library when Nie Huaisang lets go of his sleeve and puts a hand to his head, looking even more pale than before. Jin Guangyao catches him before he can topple into the wall and then bites his tongue when green eyes slide over him, gaze unseeing.

“Sang-er?” he asks cautiously.

Nie Huaisang’s eyes don’t clear, but he seems to still be at least halfway lucid. “I’m sorry… I don’t feel well. I think I need to stay here. You remember the rest of the way, don’t you?”

“I do, but this is no proper place for you to rest.” He leans around the corner and waves over a passing servant. “Would you assist Nie-zongzhu to his room, please?”

“Of course, of course,” the woman says in a tone that conveys she is apparently -unfortunately- used to this. “Come along,” she says, taking hold of Nie Huaisang’s hand and wrapping a steadying arm around his waist, as if guiding a lost child, and he follows her lead without complaint.

Jin Guangyao watches them go and squashes that sour feeling when it threatens to churn.

Answers.

Answers first.

---

The library he needs, he has decided, is not the primary library, the one that Nie Huaisang had been taking him to. No, he seeks out the room buried so deep in the Unclean Realms that no daylight reaches it, that he had only stumbled upon by accident back when he had been employed here.

Lighting the only lantern in the room with a flame talisman, he finds that nothing has changed since the last time he was here other than a thickening of the layer of dust.

Swallowing hard, he straightens his back and starts with the family records.

---

‘After much deliberation and testimony from the physicians and healers involved in the care of the first young master, it is the advice of the sect elders that- ’

He has relit the lantern twice, and he’s fairly sure it’s long past dinner when he sinks into a chair and slaps the open scroll down onto the table, feeling lightheaded and shaky.

A spirit-tethering.

Until he had seen the books Lan Xichen carried from the library of the Cloud Recesses, such a thing had been the stuff of fantasy stories. Even in the vaunted Lan texts, it was only described in abstract theory.

And yet there was apparently enough foundation to it that a serious proposal had been made to cast such a thing between a pair of children to keep Nie Mingjue from being torn apart by the saber he’d bonded with far too young.

He forces himself to keep reading, feeling his stomach sink with every passage.

Nie Haoran had argued viciously against the idea for two years, even offering himself as the tether, only to be shot down due to his own unstable health. He had only given in when his son had experienced his first qi deviation at eleven years of age.

Eleven years old.

Nie Huaisang would have only been five.

Jin Guangyao bites his tongue again and presses the back of his hand to his mouth to forcibly swallow back the bile that bubbles up in his throat.

The mechanics of the matter only make the horror of it even more stark. The only ones who would have been able to undo the tether would have been the brothers themselves. He finds notes, plans, all written in Nie Mingjue’s sharp-edged calligraphy, of how he would set his brother free once his own health became too compromised but before his mind was too unstable…

But he hadn’t done it.

Hadn’t been able to do it.

He’d deteriorated too quickly.

Instead...

Nausea continuing to roil in his guts like a thunder cloud, Jin Guangyao rolls up the scroll and shoves it back into place with enough force that it crumples, practically fleeing the room even though there is no monster there to escape, just-

It is indeed dark outside as he traverses the hallways, barely able to restrain himself from running.

No one answers when he knocks at Nie Huaisang’s door. He sucks in a sharp breath to ground himself, then carefully pushes it open.

The room is as stark as he remembers from his last visit. Though he knows he Lan Xichen have both offered to help, Nie Huaisang has yet to start replacing any of the possessions that his brother had burnt. There is a tray of food on the table near the bed, untouched and probably long cold.

The person he’s seeking is curled up on the bed on top of the covers, still fully dressed. Fingers twitch and scratch at his own arms as he shivers, most likely in the throes of a nightmare.

His lips are moving.

Jin Guangyao doesn’t dare read them.

He closes the door behind him and crosses the room to the bed. Nie Huaisang doesn’t react to the dip in the mattress as he sits down, nor to being pulled and shifted until the younger man’s head rests in his lap. When he gently removes the guan from his hair and begins combing out the braids, however, the fit finally eases, the anxious lines of Nie Huaisang’s face smoothing out as he calms.

Jin Guangyao closes his eyes for a moment and sighs.

He now knows what is wrong with Nie Huaisang, and he knows he is at fault.

He could lay the blame elsewhere. He wants to. The elders who’d made the proposal... Nie Haoran for allowing it... the healers who’d carried it out… It is most tempting to blame Nie Mingjue for having not undone it as soon as they were both grown.

But no. The fact of the matter is that Nie Huaisang’s condition can be laid at his feet. Had he not hastened Nie Mingjue’s death… He doesn’t regret that.

He refuses to let himself regret that.

But this…

Grief could be moved past.

Missing pieces could not.

He opens his eyes to find Nie Huaisang has shifted to curl against him, and he allows himself a small, weak smile as he begins carding his fingers through silken hair again.

He knows what is wrong with Nie Huaisang, and perhaps he can’t fix the damage already done, but there are still things he can do. Information he can find, pieces he can move or remove. He can make things easier.

“It will be alright,” he murmurs, then leans down and gently presses a kiss to the sleeping young man’s temple. The gesture makes Nie Huaisang snuggle closer in his sleep, and his own smile gains strength.  “I took care of er-gongzi before, I will be happy to take care of zongzhu now. He is my responsibility, after all.”

#mdzs #nie huaisang #jin guangyao #fanfic #sangyao