#even if he Has killed already then he's still taking forrest's words to heart and reconsidering everything which DAMN- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

heshoes · 3 years

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She was his best friend and they shared everything together already anyway. What difference would it make if it were a hat, shampoo, or the same bed sometimes? So what? That's what the Uni Daze were about, having fun, traditions, getting serious, new relationships, friendships, heart ache, break-ups, make ups, secrets, the occasional/casual bajingo here and there, and possibly, just maybe, finding the love of your life and hoping that it all works out.

Warnings: smut, slow burn, angst, mentions of abortion, mentions of verbal abuse

Harry Styles x OC (Face claim Zendaya)

Uni Daze Masterlist

Chapter 2 ( Word Count 6.7K )

Harry

My school day was absolutely long but it kept me busy and busy to me is a good thing. It keeps me balanced though I know Chelle would disagree since he keeps telling me as such over the phone.

"The only reason you think that trying to fit 72 hours in a 24 hour day is a balance is because of your parents. Just because they're work driven arseholes doesn't mean that you have to follow in their footsteps.”

"That's impossible to do, I don't work that much. My parent's aren't arsehole's they're just successful. Is that so wrong to want success?”

"It is when its your last year of uni and you're being a kill joy.”

"I said I would go out for drinks, Chelle. How is my compliance to something that I don't want to do being a kill joy?”

"Because you're not doing it with a smile. You've become boring. Your sex life and your regular life has turned about as vanilla as a middle aged man. We never had to beg you to come out last year or over the summer, Harrow. Think of it as a week of extended holidays. No one does anything the first week of classes anyway. It's all rules and instructions on how to prepare. We've been in uni for three years. We should know the jist of it by now.”

"But it's not summer anymore, Chelle and you know some professors like to give assignments in the first few days. We have two papers already in seminar for fucks sake.”

Michelle sighed in annoyance.

"Yeah, but, those aren't due for ages, Haz. Fun is due right now.”

"This is the year to pull your shit together. Everyone can't not study and get perfect marks like you. Sorry.”

"The phrase 'can't not' is a double edged sword.”

"What?" I spun around in my desk at work, handing a first year her keys. Its only the first day and she's already lost her keys and has to use her spare for a fifty pound charge. She looks nervous as well and her face is kind of red. She grins at me and says a shy 'thank you' before walking away, staring back at me and kind of tripping over her own feet on her way to the lift. I tried not to laugh, but honestly it was kind of funny.

"You know, a double edged sword? A double negative?You can't say 'can't not' next to each other in a sentence. It's repetitive of itself. You should be embarrassed. This is primary school stuff Harrow. Mr. “I have to take the UKCAT this year.”"

"Whatever Chelle! See? That's what I mean. I need a balance. I need to be able to be involved in school. I should have taken it more serious when we first started out.”

"You do realize balance means a good amount of your job, school work, AND a social life which includes parties and pubs and going out with your mates without a grumble?”

"I'm going out for drinks tonight! You're starting to piss me off."

"If the truth is anything it's annoying, Harry." I nodded my head and began to swivel around in my chair. I'd just gotten to work and had three and a half more hours to go. I'm glad I have a job and all but this one is fucking boring.

Speaking of truth.

"Do the boys know about your um...your new team?”

"No. Actually they don’t."

Oh.

“Oh?"

"Yeah, um, I was hoping that it was something that we could keep between me and you for now. Just until I can figure things out. I'd love to say that I'm for sure just this one thing. I know I said it this morning, but I'm still not sure, okay?”

"Yeah. Sure, of course." I stopped spinning in my seat and dizzying myself when I heard my manager's voice,"Look I've gotta go. I'm not supposed to be on the phone and my boss is coming.”

"Oh so there is some rebellion left in you? You're living on the edge now, Hazland. Why can't you use your phone? All you do is sit in a chair and answer phones and make people keys when they lock themselves out of their dorm.”

"Bye Michelle!" I quickly hung up the phone and stuck it into my pocket smiling awkwardly at Professor Forrester as he approached the front desk with someone else right next to him. She had on a Cambridge work shirt much like myself letting me know that I more than likely wouldn't be alone for the rest of my shift.

"Rion, this is Harry," Professor Forrester spoke to her before addressing me, "today is her first day here at the university and working. I told her that she would be in good hands if I left her here with you. Show her the ropes and maybe show her around campus when you're not at work? I've got to go," Professor Forrester turned to face the new girl before he nodded back at me, "any questions you have, ask him. He'll know all of the answers.”

She nodded her head up and down slowly before giving a shy grin and we were left alone as Forrester left the building.

“Hi."

“Hello."

"I'm Harry.”

She laughed to herself before nodding her head at me.

"So I was told. Nice to meet you.”

Rion, I think her name was, sat down in her seat next to mine after speaking back to me, lowering her rucksack down to the ground before pulling out a book. It was a good idea really. Maybe I should have brought one? I barely get the chance to read, especially living with Michelle. She always finds a way to interrupt, either that or my ADD kicks in, all the more reason for me to put in more effort at school. I took out my phone once I knew that Forrester was gone, but I really had nothing to do with it. I had no new text messages besides Michelle.

Chelle: Drinksssssss 🍻🍺🍺🍺🍻🍻🍻😉

I grinned before shaking my head and replying back to her, something just as stupid as she sent me.

To Chelle: Tortureeeeeeee😣🔫🍺😒

Chelle: Dramatic!

Ignoring her last text, I took out my earphones and turned up the music on my phone as I placed them in my ears. I suppose it was a bit loud because out of the corner of my eye I could see Rion scrunching her nose while she tried to read.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you.”

"No disturbance, I was just trying to figure the tune. Runaway?”

“Wh-what?"

She laughed before she pointed to the phone in my hand and repeated herself.

"Is that Runaway by Ed Sheeran?”

I nodded my head, not able to stop the stupid grin that cut across my face.

"You know Ed Sheeran that’s not on top 40?”

"Who doesn't? The man's a musical genius.”

She smiled at me before she turned back to her book, but I couldn't help but to keep talking to her.

"What school did you used to go to? Um, if you don't mind me asking…"

"Nope, don't mind at all. I used to go to Bristol Uni. How about yourself? Have you been at Cambridge all of your university career?”

I nodded my head and she looked impressed, but I'm sure she wouldn't be if she knew that I was a legacy and that I slacked off for the first three and a half years. Good thing that I'm getting my shit together now.

"Yeah, it’s alright here.”

"Just alright?”

"One of the best alrights I guess. Welcome to Cambridge and congratulations.”

"Thank you.”

I smiled at her and the conversation was on the verge of ending, but before I stuck my other ear bud in I paid closer attention to the book that she had in her hand.

"Scott Fitzgerald."

"Pardon?" Rion raised an eyebrow at me.

"That's F. Scott Fitzgerald.”

She raised her book showing me the spine, shocked that I hadn't seen the cover but still got the author right.

"You know F. Scott Fitzgerald?" She smiled at me while relaying my words back to me.

"Who doesn't? The man was a written genius. Not to mention that the book you're reading happens to be one of my favorites.”

She smiled again.

"Usually people only notice Fitzgerald if The Great Gatsby is involved." She turned her chair towards mine giving me a better view of her.

"Gatsby is a classic, but I think that The Curious Case of Benjamin Button has more character.”

We continued to talk and before I knew it the shift was over. No one else needed keys and the phone barely rung. I probably would have stayed beyond the time that I was supposed to get off talking and creating awkward conversation with Rion had it not been for Michelle's reminders:

Chelle: Tonight is gonna be fun 😊

Chelle: You're off work in 1⃣5⃣ min🎉🎊

Chelle: I'm gonna get you so fucked up!😝

Chelle: I'm excited 😬

To Chelle: No 💩. Too excited I reckon 😐

I laughed to myself as I gathered my things to leave the building, not fully believing that I allowed Michelle to talk me into drinking tonight, even though part of me knew that I wouldn't be able to break tradition. Rion put her book away, that she never really got into reading and followed behind me out the door and to the parking lot. She seemed cool from what I got to know about her in the amount of time that I did and since she's new, I figure that it wouldn't hurt to ask.

"Hey, a couple of my friends and I are getting together tonight to The Mill. Its a pub right up the road on Mill lane, if you're not busy, you should, um, you should come.”

"Mill pub? On a Monday?”

"Yeah, it's kind of a tradition that we started when we started here." I rub my shoulder as I wait for her answer. I don't know why I feel nervous about it but I do.

"It sounds like fun, but I shouldn’t, not tonight at least. I wouldn't be able to bear it if I missed class tomorrow because of a hangover, and I kind of also have plans.”

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make it like you didn't have anything else to do or-”

"No it's fine it's just... I have a date.”

"Right. Sorry again.”

"I'll see you around though I hope?”

"Yeah, I'll see you at work.”

Rion nodded her head while giving me a content smile before she got into her car and as she pulled off, she waved to me. I waved back but as soon as her car was out of sight, I slapped myself in the face with the palm of my hand. Maybe six months is too long to go without any type of real interaction with the opposite sex besides Michelle, but honestly she doesn't count...or maybe she counts for both now?

I cleared my head of my thoughts as I got into my car that I feel like I'm too tall for. Even with the seat pushed down as low as it can go, I still can feel the top of my head brush against the roofing of it. By now I'm sure I've saved up enough to get a new one. A new car could be my mini treat to myself for cutting myself off from a social life. The more that I think about the way that my conversation with Rion just ended the more that I start to agree with Michelle and the more excited I get for the night of boozy tradition.

As soon as eleven thirty-five hit, my phone rang. When I answered it Michelle's voice came through clear as if she were sitting here next to me in the car, even though background noise and music blares in the room around her.

"Everyone is here but you. Are you en route?”

"Everyone?" I ask her with skepticism in my tone. I would be shocked if everyone showed up.

"Yes everyone. Niall, Darragh, and Zayn. Everyone but you. Are you on your way?”

I don't know why I even asked her if everyone would be there. I knew that Louis wouldn't show even though it was him and Darragh who started this tradition..

"Yeah, I'm on my way. This should be fun.”

"That's the spirit I've been looking for Harrow. It sounds like you've had a change of heart since earlier.”

"Yeah, I think I've been looking at my textbooks too long and not at real people. One night won't kill me I suppose.”

"If one night is done right, then yes, yes it will. And what do you mean you don't see real people? I see you everyday.”

"You're not a real person, Michelle. I'm not quite sure what you are yet.”

"I think I might have an idea by now." Michelle said while chuckling on the other end of the line.

"And what would that be?”

"Getting lucky tonight. Get here soon and I can be your wing-lady.”

The pub was in the early stages of being crowded when I got there and I couldn't deny how excited I was to see the boys, Michelle included even though I saw her only just this morning. The last time that we were all together was in the middle of June, but after that we really hadn't had time to hang out. Everyone had gotten busy and into their own things. Besides keeping in touch over the phone occasionally, we haven't really talked that much either.

The first person that I saw when I got in was Niall. He sat next to Darragh with a cigarette hanging from his lips, patting down his jeans in search of a lighter no doubt. When we made eye contact, he stuck his arms out to the side with his fingers spread wide and a smile on his face. Darragh looked at him as if he lost his mind until he followed Niall's line of vision and then quickly stood from his seat.

"Harry! How are you lad? Drinks are on Liam so order the most expensive thing possible.”

I received two claps on the back from each of them when I reached the table and then a smack on my ass that made me jump and then turn around find the guilty culprit. I should have known who it was straight away.

"Chelle! That actually hurt.”

She laughed at my discomfort with some kind of frothy drink in her hand as I grabbed my bum cheek and rubbed it over my jeans.

"Probably because there's barely any meat there to cushion the blow.”

I shook my head at her and squinted my eyes before I responded, "It's not about what's back there, its all about what's in the front. Girls don't date me for my bum.”

“Well, according to you, girls don't date you at all, not recently at least.”

Niall and Darragh started to laugh and a stream of smoke came through Niall's nose reminding me of an angry bull from a cartoon before he took another drag from his cigarette, this time intentionally blowing a ring of smoke before sucking it back in through his nostrils. I probably could have strangled Michelle in that moment, but it was true. My mind goes back to Rion and work and I can feel my cheeks burn with embarrassment.

"Mitch told us about your six month drought.”

"Stop calling me Mitch!”

Niall ignored Michelle's outburst before continuing, "She says you haven't gotten laid since your birthday.”

"Do you know what a penis fly catcher even looks like anymore?" Darragh added to Niall's teasing causing my nose to scrunch.

"Penis fly catcher?”

"Yeah, it's better than what you call it. What do you say again? Bajango?”

"No Darragh," Niall cuts in, "Django was a movie. He says bajingo. It makes sense to me.”

Michelle scrunches her nose in disgust and confusion at our conversation but doesn't say anything. Really though, what more could be added to this?

"It's not that big of a deal guys." I bring the conversation back to where it was before it drifted into a dark place so quickly. It can't be that bad. Can it? Perhaps it is? I don't even know at this point anymore.

"Oi leave him alone," Zayn chimed in as he walked up to the table with Liam with two beers in hand, passing me one before he sat down, "its alright Harry sex isn't everything...but six months is a long ass time. But enough about that. What has everyone been up to?”

It was almost like a show and tell as we went around the table talking about what we'd missed out on over the summer since we hadn't seen each other. Niall and Darragh went to Ibiza for the month of July staying in hostels and partying until all hours of the morning. Apparently Niall is in love with a girl he met there, but he doesn't remember her name so I don't know how accurate that is

Zayn spent a good amount of time in France with his girlfriend, sorry, fiancé. The fucker got engaged in France. Everyone thought that he and Daphne were gonna be a short lived thing since they met at a club and all, but people find love and fall in it in mysterious ways I guess. Michelle would be a prime example of that...but love is not involved with her apparently. A player not to be played anymore. I still have questions to ask her about that but I guess I'll have to wait until later since she doesn't want the guys to know that she's traded outies for innies. I could out her like she did me and my drought, but that's way more personal and I've decided that I'm not that much of an asshole, if I'm one at all that is.

Liam was arrested and his parents flipped out. For what I'm kind of scared to ask, but I'm sure it was something accidental. Sometimes I wonder how Liam even got into Cambridge, but I guess that they don't test for common sense, only book smarts.

When it got to Michelle's turn, she just talked about how she flew back home for a few weeks at the very start of summer to visit family and then came back here, but of course that's not anything that I didn't already know. When she came back was when I noticed all of the girlfriends that she had. It was odd to me because Michelle generally hated girls and hanging out with them, but then again, she obviously doesn't hate them that much.

When I told them that the most exciting part of my summer had been joining a book club for some work that I had to get ready to do for senior class, studying for the UKCAT that's not until the end of the school year, and sometimes coming here to Mill pub with Michelle I realized that what she said was true. My life had become vanilla, but I'm honestly kind of alright with it.

We continued to talk, share, laugh and drink until it was at least half three in the morning. I was waiting to see if Michelle was going to change her mind and let the lads know about her newfound liking but she kept it private between me and her the way that she said she would and it kind of made me smile. That along with the ridiculous amount of beer and shots consumed brought a goofy smile to my face by the end of the night.

By exactly three forty-five I was seeing double and couldn't drive home. Niall and Darragh had left to go back to their apartment that happened to be a few blocks down from ours, and Zayn and Liam stayed behind at the bar to drink deciding that they were too far gone now and might as well finish strong. They also decided that class tomorrow isn't important.

Michelle would have stayed behind with them I'm sure, but she has the tendency to be this odd motherly type when I get beyond the legal limit. I think she just likes to laugh at me because I start to say foolish things when my tongue loosens up in my mouth and my words slur. I tried to get up from the table discreetly so that I could walk home while Mitch, Zayn, and Liam continued to chat, but I knocked over a chair.

“Oh shit. I'm sorry bro." I chuckled to myself like an idiot as I picked up the chair earning the lads attention.

"Where are you going?" Michelle's eyes seemed to widen as she took in the state of me.

"Home. I've got class in the morrow-morning.”

"Do you honestly think that you're going to make it to class? Look at you, you can barely stand. My job is complete.” Michelle grins in triumph and I squint my eyes at her trying to figure out when she was going to tell me that she was a triplet.

"You're a horrible people and I don't know why we're friends." I think I was looking at her when I said it, but it could have very well been one of her sisters.

"Alright, and that's my cue. We'll see you later guys." Michelle spoke to Liam and Zayn as stood from the table, a little wobbly at best bus still in a better condition than I was in.

"You don't have to walk me home, Michelle. I'm not no kid.”

Michelle laughed as I stumbled, almost tripping on a crack in the pavement.

"Since I live there too I'm not technically walking you home. I'm walking home with you.”

I checked to see if my car was locked before we began our walk. The crisp early morning air sobered me up a bit, but I was still highly intoxicated and grinning.

"How was your first day of classes?" Michelle asked me breaking the silence of our trek back to our flat.

"Hmm, was okay. Good actually... I met this…met this girl.”

"You did? You were holding out on us at the pub! Who is it? Do I know who she is?”

"No, I don't think you do," I paused to hiccup hoping that was all that I had to do, "She's new here and you don't like girls. I mean, well, you know what I mean. You wouldn't know her.”

Michelle laughed while shaking her head.

“So it's a first year? I'm ashamed of you! I know you haven't dated in a while but that's sweeping the bottom of the barrel, Harrow.”

“No not a first year," hiccup "She's around my age, just new to Cambridge.”

“Oh," Michelle spoke putting her key in the door before she opened it "Where'd you meet her?”

“Work. I kind of asked her to come to the pub with me, but she said she had a date and I kind of sounded like a blubbering idiot when I asked her. I don't know.”

“Harry! You can't just invite people to come to the pub and we haven't met them yet! What if she was awful? Good thing she didn't come. That tradition is sacred for us. Whatever you said to her was probably fine. She just had other plans... Do you know why I've recently started calling you Harrow Harry?”

“Because it's one of the many odd nicknames you've created for me?”

“No. Harrow as in the adjective, it just so happens to fit with you. Har•row when used in verbal tense, means to cause distress to. You're causing unnecessary distress to yourself when you worry about things like the UKCAT and assignments that aren't due until the end of the year, and whatever you've said to this mystery bird that you've met at work. Fun. You used to be much less tense and more fun. You need to chill out and relax. You need to I don't know, get some maybe.”

I rolled my eyes before running my hand through my hair and walking into the kitchen, opening the cabinet in search of my favorite drunken snack, grabbing it when I found it and heading for my room. Quickly stripping off into my boxers, I fell against my bed before I turned on my television and got under the covers. I ate my snack in peace before Michelle knocked on my door twice and then let herself in.

"I could have been naked! you could at least wait for me to say come in.”

“Yeah well, its not like I've never seen a penis before and they're not really my main thing anymore you know?” Michelle climbed into bed with me, intruding while I tried to hide my snacks.

"What are you eating?”

“Nothing.” I slowed my chewing in hopes that she would lose interest.

"Harry I see them! Are those teddy grahams?”

“No!”

“They are! They're a snack for a five year old.”

“Teddy grahams don't have an age limit.”

“You should be embarrassed.” Chelle spoke before grabbing the box and taking a handful for herself, moving around too much for my drunken stomach to handle.

"Oohh these are nice. These are new sheets aren't they?”

"Chelle! Stop moving! Why are you in my room? Get out!”

“My room is too hot, so I've decided that we're going to have a sleepover. You get the better ventilation. You should trade with me.”

“What?”

“I'll sleep on the floor. It really is dreadful in my room.”

I sigh before I grab my pillows and comforter and toss them on the ground leaving Michelle the bed as I make my way to the floor.

“Aww Harry you're the sweetest, but I can really take the floor.”

“No, it's fine. Just don't do anything perverted while you're up there.”

“What like masturbate? I'm not you.”

I chuckled turning to face her from my position on the floor.

“Exactly, but if you do at least that I’m asleep first…Thats just common courtesy. ”

“Sure thing, Harlot. I can do that for you.” Michelle responded without pause causing me to chuckle before my head hit the pillow.

****

“ My head,” I groaned, waking up on the floor with my covers wrapped around me too tight much like a swaddling cloth. After successfully the blanket away from me in an attempt to escape confinement, I sat up slowly only to make the headache worse than it already was and add a new pain to the mix. “My back.”

I had almost forgotten that I slept on the floor to be nice and allowed Michelle to stay in my bed, but when I turned around to look at it I quickly discovered that she wasn't there. I could hear fumbling around in the kitchen and when I stood to follow the noise, the pounding in my head grew. When I reached the small space that we mostly use to microwave shitty food and store alcohol and juice, I saw that Michelle was fully dressed. I mean, well, if you can call an oversized sweater and tights with ladders down the legs in random places dressed then thats what she was.

“Morning, sunshine. How do you feel.”

“Like my head might explode all over the kitchen and I still have to get ready for class. Today is going to be long as shit,” my words slurred proving that there was still traces of alcohol in my bloodstream and when I swayed back and forth feeling as if I might lose my balance, I knew, “I'm still fucked.”

Michelle laughed at me before she flipped her pancake onto a plate and ran it back and forth below my nose. I snatched it from her and took a bite of the buttery breakfast cake without using the fork that she offered.

“Don't be such a savage, Haz. I'm not going to take the food from you after I've clearly been slaving over the oven for five whole minutes so that you could eat. Slow down, chew your food, and sit like a civilized human being. If you eat like that you're going to require the heimlich maneuver and unfortunately I don't know it. You'll turn blue and die in front of me on a Tuesday afternoon and that would put a slight damper on my day.”

“Afternoon?” I asked her while chewing around the pancake, “Afternoon?”

“Yes, Styles. Thats what I said.”

I put the plate that I was holding down on our small kitchen bench before I walked out into living room to squint at the only other clock that we had besides our cell phones, only to confirm what Chelle had just said. I rubbed my hands over my eyes hoping that it was just an illusion and what I'd seen was wrong because if it was the truth, I'd missed all of my morning classes for the day.

“Three eleven? It can't be three eleven! I had classes from nine until two!”

“And you slept through them like a baby.”

“Fuck! Michelle why didn't you wake me up? What's the point of having an Ultimate Alarm if it's not going to be used?”

“Harry, remember that little chat we had yesterday about distress and the use of your nickname? And in order for me to wake you up, I would have had to been up too. Even if I was, I wouldn't be using the Ultimate Alarm to save you with the splitting hangover that I had,” Michelle shakes her head in clear disgust before she continued, “too loud.”

My eyes widened as I looked at my friend, bewildered, annoyed, and somewhere deep down, somewhat amused. I waved my hand between the two of us before I gave up and ran it over my face exasperatedly. This is not how I intended to start the year off. My hand ascended from my face to sliding through my hair in distress, “Thats the point of the alarm, Michelle. It's supposed to be loud. It's supposed to wake you up.”

“Harry, calm down. When we got to sleep it was like seven in the morning anyway. I don't know how you expected to be up, awake, and alert in class. Don't you have like seven others that you can go to tonight? Over achiever.”

“If I shower now I can make it to my organic chemistry class.”

“Gross.”

I looked over to Michelle and frowned before I continued, “ Thanks for throwing me off by the way, making pancakes at three in the afternoon and making me think that it was morning.”

“Whatever time of day that you wake up is morning to me. I was feeling like pancakes, so I made pancakes. You didn't seem to mind them by the way that you were eating them a few minutes ago, arsehole.”

The mention of the food reminded me of how dry my throat was and how alcohol will leave your mouth feeling like you'd guzzled sand if you consume enough of it. I felt like a raisin.

“Do we have anymore orange juice?”

"No. Sorry I finished that all yesterday morning when you almost killed me and Alison with that damn fog horn.”

“Alison?” I smirked at Michelle before I started to tease. "Usually a player doesn't remember a conquests name.”

“You would know," she retorted back while squinting her eyes, “ you used to be one. But don't worry, Harry. I'll get so good at it that you won't ever catch one of them leaving the next morning ever again. I'll be like a black widow or is it a praying mantises that kill all other intimacy as soon as they've finished with them? I'll send them on their way so that I can sleep in my bed alone. It'll be like a switch.”

Michelle grinned as she spoke, silently approving her idea as I thought about how lonely it sounded. It actually saddened me. Michelle isn't the type that can handle being cold hearted and callous enough to kick people out of bed. After being in a monogamous relationship for three years, I could tell that she was the type who craved intimacy. She deserved it. What she just explained to me sounded like eventually it would take its toll on her and she would break down like she did before, substituting my shirt sleeves for tissues.

I keep my opinions to myself, not having enough time before my next class starts to really sit down with her and talk about them. If it's one thing that I cherish about Michelle and I's relationship is that we can literally almost talk about anything, if we had the proper amount of time to do so. I shake my head at her before I head down the hall, calling back to her.

“I never was a player, Mitch. I just wasn't steady in my relationships like you.”

"Whatever you say, Harold. Please go put on trousers…I don't want to see your moose knuckle.”

****

I'd made it to my chemistry lecture on time, and though I tried my hardest, it was extremely difficult to keep my eyes open. Even though I'd slept past all of my morning classes, I still didn't get the best rest from sleeping on the floor. Michelle was irritatingly right again. The only thing that was really mentioned today since it was still the very beginning of the school year, was instruction and what the professor expected from us as a class, so when my eyes closed momentarily as I sat at the back of the room, I didn't feel so bad. Before I knew it the lecture was over and I was rustled awake my the movement of students as they gathered their bags to leave the room.

"You've got a bit of dribble there." A familiar voice laughed as I stepped out of the classroom I wiped my mouth sheepishly before smiling at her.

“Rion, hi how are you?”

“I'm good. Getting around campus well enough, but how are you? You look pretty worn out and its only the second official day of the school year. Did your tradition get the best of you last night? You've got imprint marks from your sweater on your face.”

My hand went to the side of my face that she pointed out, the imprints from my clothing giving away my previous position before I flashed her a quick grin and responded ,Um, uh yeah kind of. I may or may not have missed all of my classes this morning. Mitch didn't wake me up, bad influence I guess.”

“Mitch?”

"Oh, um sh- Mitch is just...Mitch is my roommate." I explained in a panic I didn't want to scare her off with the details. I think I might actually have a chance with Rion, if I don't put my foot in my mouth that is.

“Oh I see.”

Rion smiled at me and I didn't even realize that we've been walking and talking this entire time. Conversation flows easily with her even though I stumble over my words. I feel like I'm just remembering how to talk to the opposite sex besides Michelle and feel kind of pathetic, but Rion doesn't seem to mind as she continues to smile laugh and start on new topics of conversation.

“So how long were you out for?”

“I didn't go to sleep until seven this morning and my head was pounding when I woke up. I really have no one to blame but myself. I told my friends that I would only have one drink and ended the night on my ass. I still have to go back to the pub and get my car, because I had to end up walking home. How I got to the right apartment on the first try is a mystery to me.”

Rion giggled in a cute way before tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear allowing me to see her features more. Her neck was slender and long, connecting to her shoulders delicately. She had a small tattoo that looked to be a ballet flat behind her left ear. Those tattoos placed just there always seemed like they might hurt, like they deserved to be kissed better even though the ache from the needle has been long gone. I could envision my lips on just that spot. I must have glanced at her just a bit longer than I should have causing a rosy hue to make its presence known on her cheeks. It made me smile before I quickly changed the subject this time, not wanting her to think that I was rude or weird for staring.

"How did your date go?"

She took deep breath before deciding if she wanted give a response or not and we ended up in the courtyard right before the student parking lot.

"It came and went, I suppose. Nothing really interesting to report. It sounds like I would have had more fun if I had taken the offer to go out for drinks with you. I'm usually not really big on drinking on the weekdays, but after that date I honestly might have taken a shot or four."

I smiled, selfishly happy that she didn't have a good time. I want to ask her out, but I feel like its too damn soon. I only met her yesterday anyway. Maybe its a good thing that she turned me down. When the time is right to ask her I'm sure I'll know. Hopefully I will.

"I'm sorry it didn't go as planned. Someone should take you out and show you a good time."

"Yeah, hopefully someone will sooner rather than later."

I think the emphasis that she put on the word someone was aimed at me, but I could be wrong. I don't know what else to say so I cap the conversation off with a , "Yeah" and mentally slap myself in the face before I grin awkwardly at her. I look around the parking lot as we come up to a white Toyota and she takes her keys out signaling that the tiny car is hers.

"Oh, well I'll let you go and get on with the rest of your day. Good seeing you."

"Okay, yeah." She responds quietly before she puts the key in the lock to open the door.

This has to be the most awkward I've felt in a while. I radiate awkward and though I don't want to believe it's because of what Michelle and the boys said, I'm kind of starting to think that they might be right myself.

"Wait, Harry?"

"Yes?" I turn my head to look over my shoulder before turning around to face her.

"I can take you to go get your car if you'd like. It looks like it might rain and it would suck if you were to get all wet."

All wet. I blush at her word choice and from that point on I know. Michelle, Niall, and Darragh were right.

"No. No its okay. You don't have to and I mean, don't you have other classes?"

She shakes her head and then opens her other car door, "I'm done for the day. Really I don't have a problem taking you. Get in."

I walk back towards her, thanking her and then giving her directions to the pub from the main campus. When we pull up, sure enough my car is there. Along with a ticket taped to the window for leaving it in the lot overnight. I sigh and rub my hands over my eyes before I get out and thank Rion again. Just as she's about to pull off, I call her name causing her to stop the car and reverse.

"Yes?" She looks at me eagerly with her eyes slightly widened and and traces of a grin on her face. I scratched my head out of embarrassment before I speak while pointing to the passenger side of the car.

"I left my book bag in your car."

"Oh, sorry. Here you go." The grin falls as she unlocks her car door so that I can get my bookbag. This time when she pulls off, I wave an awkward goodbye to her before getting in my car, knocking my head against the steering wheel in defeat causing the horn to honk.

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles smut #harry styles fic rec #harry styles x oc #harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x original character #harry styles au #harry styles fluff

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angelz-dust · 3 years

Text

masters of none - part 4 (jason todd x reader)

summary: after many months, we are back in action and back in reader’s head. pls enjoy these jason crumbs. if you need a refresher on the plot, the other chapters will be linked below!

word count: 3.7k

warnings: food/eating. alcohol. cursing.

part 1 /// part 2 //// part 3

gravity

ever since i ever felt ya, right there life couldn't seem better. tulip flowers in my sweater. ask me now, is this forever?

…

you rested your chin on the table before you, your arms hanging limply between your knees as you listened to your manager, dana. you were really just watching her mouth open and close while she pointed at a powerpoint. god, what you would've given for an extra hour of sleep. the all nighters in the studio were starting to take a toll.

the feeling of the back of daisy’s soft hands brought you back to earth. the smell of cocoa butter dancing beneath your nostrils as her smooth engagement ring rolled across your cheek. you breathed in her smell, exhaling in content through your nose.

“you good?” she mouthed and you closed your eyes, giving her a little nod. the bassist rubbed her calloused fingers against your forehead, pushing strands of your hair past your hairline. you pouted when she eventually pulled away, leaving you only with the sensation of touch that once was.

you heard tyler shift in his seat and then felt some air graze against your hand. you looked under the table, noticing he was holding something out to you. you two made eye contact briefly before you scooted back in, grabbing what felt like an envelope. looking down at your lap, you saw a sticky note attached to it. jason’s money was what it said. you carefully put the envelope in your jacket pocket, sitting back in your seat now and looking at dana’s powerpoint. she was going over reports from your publicist, jerry, which you didn't particularly care about.

“now, i have to ask,” dana’s words pierced your bubble of inattention. “have you all thought about what i said about this next album?”

jordy raised his hand like a school kid. “yes?”

“y/n and i decided that we'd be okay with making our album a group project. it has been, admittedly, kinda hard and boring without everyone else. we’d honestly be doing ourselves a disservice by not doing it together,” jordy explained, dana clapping her hands together.

“wonderful,” she nodded, keeping her hands clasped. “i know you two were excited to do your own thing, but i was talking to jerry and he was really pressing me to get a group album from you guys. the people wanna see you guys as a unit of established artists, which you all are. so what's the concept? we never discussed it.”

“uh,” you verbally paused, raising your arms above your head to stretch. “disco, jazz, and funk. it's a mix of those.”

“retro is in right now,” dana nodded, pacing around the room. “how far back will this set us on a release date?”

you grimaced, leaning back in your seat, the back of the seat lightly bouncing as it absorbed your weight. you pondered the question for a moment. “if it’s gonna be a group thing, it'll have to be significantly longer. we have a decent starting off point but i'm gonna need way more songs now.”

“what about the rest of you? any tracks that we could swing?” dana asked, looking at the rest of the group.

grabbing a pen and piece of scrap paper, you started jotting down notes as everyone spoke out to you. dex and quinton didn’t have anything, but they wouldn’t be a problem. you just needed to give them a beat to rap over and you’d be set. the twins had a finished song already that fit the concept, which was good. with tyler’s voice and aly’s excellent song writing abilities, you doubted very seriously that anything else needed to be done to it. daisy and hector had plenty of lyricless songs, too. funk and soul was their specialty, after all. misha even had a demo track she was willing to share.

you looked over the notes you had taken, tapping your pen on the table as you hummed to yourself. “this could probably work. we’ll need to go over everything in the studio, though.”

“we should just do it now. no one is doing shit else today, right?” dex asked the group, who all shook their head.

“i have a request,” you raised your finger, looking at dana. “i want gotham to be involved in this project.”

“gotham…” dana repeated slowly, unsure of what you meant. “care to elaborate?”

“music videos directed by student directors from gotham university, commissioning local artists for album art. dancers, actors, musicians, whatever. all of them have to be from gotham. i don't want any of the money we put into this project leaving this city,” you stated firmly, dana giving you a blank look.

“i like that idea,” hector said, giving you a kind smile before turning to dana, shifting in his seat. the drummer was like a big brother, always backing you up in moments like these. “accessibility to the arts is really limited here and we should change that.”

“i’d rather give back to the city, too,” quinton agreed, playing with the gold cross hanging from his neck. “we’re one of the only groups in gotham known outside of gotham. we should use that as an opportunity to rep our city.”

“it sounds like you have your minds made up on this,” dana narrowed her eyes, letting out a sigh. “it would definitely be good PR.”

“because god forbid we do something out of the kindness of our hearts,” misha laughed, rolling her eyes. “we're trying to put the city on and you're worried about how it makes us look.”

“that's my job, misha. don't you want me to do my job?” dana retorted. “besides, i'm more concerned with the funding. you all don't have disposable income, believe it or not.”

“but i know someone who does,” she said with a singsong tone, giving you a look.

“i hope you're not referring to me,” you deadpanned. your income was far from disposable.

“i’m referring to our good friend, bruce wayne,” she explained, grabbing a business card out of her purse, handing it over to dana. “ever since i got invited to that charity gala, i've had a direct line to a representative with the wayne foundation. i say we ask them to help fund the project.”

“now that could work,” dana admitted, eyeing the card as she tapped her foot. “if we pitch for more youth involvement, it'll probably go over better. we all know how much bruce wayne loves saving the children.”

you frowned at how dana described bruce’s initiatives as a philanthropist. you were sure his motivations for favoring youth projects were good intentioned, considering his parents had been killed when he was just a little boy. you wanted to go into this good intentioned, too and you hoped that they'd agree. they being the wayne foundation and subsequently, bruce himself.

“ty and quinton could do something with forrester. if we’re going for the youth involvement route, i mean,” aly spoke up.

“forrester correctional. our old stomping grounds,” quinton sighed wistfully as he patted tyler on the shoulder. “i think that would be a good idea.”

“they use the arts as an outlet for them, so it could be beneficial for everyone,” tyler nodded. “there are a lot of good kids there. just unfortunate circumstances, that’s all.”

“wasn’t one of bruce’s son’s a troublemaker before he was adopted?” aly continued, not noticing the look you and tyler shared. “i’m sure he’d probably be interested in doing something with them if his son comes from the same background.”

“it’s settled, then. you all keep working on the music. jerry and i will handle the rest. we need this album out before hector and daisy’s wedding,” dana said, grabbing her suitcase.

…

hey, i have your money. did you still want it?

you stared down at the unsent message, your thumb floating over the send arrow. you hadn’t spoken to jason since that night after the race, as per his request. your mind kept wandering back to it, even as time still went on. what happened was scary, to say the least. fun, but scary. you wondered how the hell jason didn’t get the two of you killed. that part, you didn't want to think about too hard. everyone in gotham had their secrets and it was an unspoken rule amongst citizens to not pry. secrets were secrets for a reason. nothing good ever came from unearthing them.

speaking of secrets, you hadn't exactly told tyler and quinton what happened that night. not in detail. you conveniently left out the chase and stopping to get something to eat. omitting the first part was obvious, but the second one was for your own sanity. you didn't need them teasing you over nothing. besides, all that mattered was no one was dead or arrested. and for the way the three of you used to get down, that was a win.

you considered texting jason earlier this week, just to check in on him, but you decided against it. he obviously wanted you to text him and you obviously had to do the opposite. his little mind game wasn’t going to work on you. you pressed send, frowning immediately as you did so.

maybe it already had.

“it’s too many people in this bitch,” dex sighed, the cold of the water bottle you had asked him for against your hand bringing you back to reality. blinking, you were suddenly very aware of the chaos surrounding you in the studio as you put your phone back in your pocket. you looked to your left, where jordy was leaning against the wall and scrolling through his phone. to your right was aly, who was scribbling in her songbook in the chair next to you. you remembered you were supposed to be working, too. “we need a new stu.”

“i’m working on it!” hector hollered from inside the booth as he and daisy were setting up equipment and instruments. you glanced up at the glass in front when you heard his voice, accidentally catching the pair share a little kiss. you quickly averted your gaze, smiling to yourself.

“new stu, new view, what it do?” quinton began to freestyle to a beat he was making on the coffee table in front of him. “off 92, posted up with southside crew.”

“okay,” dex laughed, noddinh his head as he was vibing with the beat, making his way out of your line of sight. you heard someone, presumably tyler, join in and add some depth to the beat. it sounded like he was hitting a pencil against a shot glass.

“i got a new boo, but i’m tryna slide with misha, too,” quinton continued, dex adlibbing in the back as quinton lowered his voice to his signature melodic whisper. “on the low, nobody gotta know.”

“would you shut the fuck up?” you heard misha say, followed by a barrage of muffled smacking noises and verbal objections from quinton, who you assumed was on the receiving end of what sounded like an assault by pillow.

laughing to yourself, you leaned your head in aly’s direction, not fully facing her. “pass me the flash drive?” you held your hand out weakly. once you felt the plastic in your palm, you leaned back over and put it into the computer, pulling up the proper files.

“we’re done back here,” daisy smiled at you, she and hector coming out from the booth.

you clapped your hands together. “wonderful. everybody shut up, please.”

you pulled up the twin’s song and let it play, your eyes fixed on the colorful audio loops on the screen. the green ones were tyler’s vocals, the purple were aly’s. it looked like blue was reserved for instruments and red was any added sound effects or layered sounds.

“you two sound really great,” jordy walked up behind aly’s seat, leaning against it as he swayed his head to the beat.

“thanks. i wrote it with our mother in mind,” aly said, the words coming out of her mouth uncomfortably. you placed your hand on hers and gave it a little squeeze, which earned you a look of appreciation.

“it's missing something, though,” tyler scratched the back of his head. “i need the producer squad to give us some assistance.”

“oh, say less,” dex laughed, snapping his fingers to the beat with one hand and holding his glass of hennessy in the other. he danced his way over, taking aly’s seat as she, tyler and jordy moved to give you all some space.

misha sauntered her way over, sitting against the table and flipping her hair over her shoulder. the smell of her sweet perfume floated in the air around you. “i think it just needs some fluffing up. some snapping might work. more vocal layering in certain spots.”

“i agree,” you nodded, dex letting out a satisfied sigh as he took a sip of his cold drink.

“is it good?” misha asked him teasingly and he took his final swig, letting out a more dramatic and drawn out sigh. this time, though, it was on beat with the song. you were pretty sure it was unintentional on his part, since he and misha just shared a laugh before returning their attention to the screen.

after a moment of pondering, you swiveled around in your chair, looking at tyler. “okay, hear me out…”

…

two weeks of very diligent working between the nine of you had given you a lot to work with for the album. all that was left was to start putting things together. you still had a ways to go, but you had a good starting off point. as much as you hated to admit it, it was a good call on dana’s part to have you all do a group album. the fans seemed to be greatly anticipating the release and the work ethic the nine of you shared was incredible. even in that cramped little studio, you all made it work.

you all agreed to take the day off, but you were still working at some capacity. you had just traded one small space for another, working in your walk-in closet/home studio for the day. you still needed said walk-in to function as a closet, so there were still garment bags pushed up into a corner and shoe boxes haphazardly stacked, surrounding your desk that you had shoved in there. there was just enough space for you to move your chair and safely get out without twisting an ankle, a fate you often flirted with in that room.

in the spirit of your day off, you hadn't done anything too difficult. you were just trying to decide what order you wanted the completed songs to go in. it may seem like an insignificant detail, but the order was important. the transitions between songs couldn't be jarring for the listener. everything had to flow together with natural progression. at this point, it didn't matter since you weren't done with the album, but it was just giving you an idea of how to fill the gaps with future songs.

the sound of your growling stomach indicated that it was time to stop for the day. you quickly saved all your work and headed to the kitchen. you popped some leftovers in the microwave and scrolled on twitter while you waited. the microwave beeped at you, so you set your phone back down and grabbed the bowl, mixing up the contents with your fork. the flash of light coming from your phone got your attention. a text notification.

are you home?

oh, so now he wanted to respond? cute.

despite your annoyance with the situation, you quickly responded with a yes and set the phone back down. you leaned against the counter, eating what little food you had in your reheated bowl. you mixed the contents around with your fork, grumbling. stupid jason and his stupid inability to text back. he could have at least had the decency to leave you on read. he probably didn't even have read receipts on. you weren't sure which was worse. tossing your now empty bowl into the sink, you grabbed your phone to read his next message.

i’ll be over soon.

soon was very vague and you wished that you would've demanded an exact time, but that opportunity had passed by the time you thought about it. you busied yourself with tidying up, trying to make your place look presentable. you even lit your new candle, which you found yourself focusing your attention on while you waited for him to show up. staring at the flame was much more entrancing than you anticipated.

you heard the door buzzer go off. you weren't expecting anyone else, so it had to be him. you leaned against the wall, pressing your finger to the button.

“who goes there?” you presented the question as a joke, but your tone was a little flat.

“it’s the irs,” jason’s voice came through and you buzzed him in.

not too long after, you heard him knock on the door. you cracked it open and the first thing you noticed was his cologne. it was a strong but pleasant scent. spicy and sweet. it was very intoxicating, actually. so much so that you almost forgot you were angry at him.

“hi.”

“hello.”

you opened the door fully and handed the envelope to him. jason eyed it suspiciously. he opened it up and began to count it out in front of you. he made an effort to do it very slow, the sound of the crisp dollars echoing in the quiet hall. his eyes stayed glued to yours as he counted out loud. you leaned against the doorframe as you watched.

“six… seven… eight,” he said, pulling out his wallet and stuffing it with the cash. “thought you would've skimmed some off the top.”

“i should have with how long you made me wait,” you said matter of factly, letting your annoyance be known now.

“i know. i’m sorry,” he sounded honest but you couldn't see it in his face or in his eyes, which was worrisome. it was a nice alternative to listening to a sputter of excuses, though. “let me make it up to you?”

“how do you plan on doing that?”

“i’m so glad you asked,” he smiled. “as it turns out, i've recently come into some money. let me spend it on you?”

“so you like throwing money at your problems?” you asked him. well, you weren't really asking. it was more like you were telling him.

“no,” he said, sounding a little offended. “i just thought-”

“you just thought that throwing money at me would make me forget about the fact that you ignored me for a month.”

“no, no,” he shook his head, sighing in frustration. “listen, i-”

“i really don't wanna hear it,” you said honestly, watching as his frustrated look turned into kicked puppy. you almost felt bad. “i don't like feeling stupid, jason. that's how i feel right now. i want you to make it up to me but you'll have to be a bit more creative than this.”

“you want me to make it up to you?” jason had repeated, confusion on his face.

you poked him harshly in the chest. “you do that or you leave me alone. those are your options. goodbye.”

you shut the door in his face and let out the breath you were holding in. you weren’t sure how jason was going to react to your little ultimatum, but those were your terms. you liked him but you weren’t going to stress over someone you barely knew, especially with your assumptions about him floating around in your head.

“i’ll be right back,” you heard him say through the door, catching you off guard.

“what?”

“don’t go anywhere.”

you didn’t respond but you heard his footsteps getting quieter as he walked down the hall. the elevator ding indicated that he had left. you stood there, confused as to what it was he was trying to do. you were still stewing in your negative emotions, so you went and busied yourself again. you decided the dishes needed washing and got on it right away. in the middle of scrubbing the stubborn sauce stains out of your plate, you heard your door buzzer go off again.

so he did come back after all. interesting.

you buzzed him in like you did before and waited by the door for him. he knocked and when you opened it, you were met with two gifts: a bouquet of pink tulips and a small box of something from the bakery around the corner.

“i shouldn’t have ignored you. it was rude and stupid and i’m sorry. it won’t happen again,” he said to you, holding out the items to you. you hesitantly accepted them, taking the opportunity to look through the plastic opening of the box to see chocolate covered strawberries.

“it better not happen again,” you pouted, looking up at him. you had to appreciate the effort he put in at such short notice. it was a sweet gesture and he actually looked sorry this time.

“it won’t,” he assured you and you smiled.

“i forgive you. but you’re on thin fucking ice,” you reminded him and he grinned at you with a nod.

“i’m going to make it up to you. just you wait,” he said confidently. “not all of us are naturally creative like you, though. you gotta give me some time to think of something else.”

“seems like you’re getting your feet wet with the flower selection,” you noted, taking a whiff of the delicate and fresh scent. they’d look nice on your coffee table.

“lady at the shop said they would convey my sincerest apologies,” he explained, a hopeful look in his eyes. “did it work?”

“for now,” you shrugged, setting the items down on the table next to the door.

“i can accept that.”

“you’re gonna have to because that’s all i’m giving you,” you said firmly. his charm wasn’t going to get him out of this one. not completely. “now go away. i want to eat my berries in peace.”

“i’ll text you as soon as i get the chance,” he told you as you were shutting the door. you peered at him, narrowing your eyes before shutting it again. “i’m serious!”

“goodbye, jason!” you said through the door. you heard his faint farewell as you walked away, plopping on the couch with your dessert in hand.

were you still a little mad at him? yes. but you weren’t going to pass up free stuff, even if you had made all that fuss about the money earlier. at least the gifts had some thought behind them. so long as he held up his end of the deal, you had a feeling being friends with jason wouldn’t be that bad.

hopefully, anyway.

#jason todd x reader #red hood x reader #dc x reader #jason todd #red hood

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it-was-all-a-beautiful-dream · 3 years

Text

Silva Lining (Saul Silva x Reader) Chapter 16

Warnings: Swearing

Word count: 2.1k

-------------------------------------------------------------------

The barrier was abandoned as you head back to the school. What was Aisha thinking? Telling the teachers their plan?

You huffed as you walked into your mothers office. Saul had stayed behind at the barrier with the Specialists while you and Aisha were escorted back by your mother and Mr Harvey. Stella, Terra and Musa were the only ones there, Bloom no where to be seen.

“Before you say anything, I didn’t say a thing, it was all this ones doing.” You hitched a thumb in Aisha’s direction. “The only thing I found out was Rosalind has been after me this whole time and has been using Bloom to get to me. She somehow knew the truth about who my mother was and knew she couldn’t use me to free her. So please please please tell me nothings happened yet and Bloom is just taking her time in the creepy hidden room?”

You sucked in a breath, forgetting to breath during your mini rant. The girls just looked shocked, less shocked than normal, they probably expect this kind of stuff now, nothing was easy when it came to your life.

You watched as Farah came back through the door way, having gone in search for Bloom. “They’re gone.”

So here you were, sitting around your dorm, having been shouted at by Mr Harvey; who you don’t think you’ve ever seen angry before. Terra stood up to him and then he locked you all in using magic…. could anything else go wrong. Oh wait, you spoke too soon.

You kicked back in your chair, leather boot clad feet up on the table as you listened to Stella go in on Aisha for being a snitch.

“Bloom is being selfish, the last thing Miss Dowling needs is to be worried about Rosalind.” That made you stir in your seat. Your feet came off the table with a thud.

“Stell, she does have a point there. You know how much shit we’ve cause Dowling, I know with the new found relationship status I could come across as bias but after all, all this shit is happening because of me once again. Can we just stop arguing for one second and figure out how were going to help?”

Your speech was interrupted by the flickering of lights. “Okay did anyone else see that or am I having some weird magic stroke?” The rest of the room murmured. Okay, not a stroke.

“This shouldn’t be happening, Alfea is an outpost it runs on magic.” Terra paced and Musa and Sam joined the rest of them in the room.

Sam, being able to walk through walls, decided to go and check it out. See what was happening.

“Wait I can come with you..” You volunteered but he had already vanished. “Okay thennn.” What felt like seconds later Sam was back through the wall screaming in agony, his stomach sliced open, blood soaked through his clothing.

“There’s a burned one in the school!”

---------------------------------------------------------------------

The courtyard was the busiest you’d ever seen it. Your mother was using magic to slam windows shut, fire fairies were welding them shut completely. Saul was on one side dishing out armour and weapons to anyone who’d take it. Mr Harvey had set up a medical bay for the suspected casualties. Your mind was spinning. The voices had started when Sam came through the wall. Whispers in your mind almost like it was your subconscious. It was fucking annoying.

Looking around you saw a hell of a lot of scared faces. Your heart beat rapidly in your chest, you hadn’t had a panic attack in months but it sure felt as if you were having one now. This was happening because of you. Innocent people were going to be hurt because the burned ones wanted one thing. You. Your eyes scanned the courtyard as your mothers speech rang out. Saul caught your eye, and gave you a look. Scared, worried, love. He conveyed it all with just one look. He was going to get hurt. Because of you. In that moment you knew what you had to do.

Trying to sneak away had failed. Since meeting Stella you knew you’d had a bond more stronger than friendship. You were blood and something about that gave her an edge. She knew you were about to do something stupid, she could literally feel the dread running through her veins.

“Please tell me you’re not going out there alone, how many times is it going to take for you to realise were better off as a team.”

Stella made you jump as she spoke up behind you, with her was Aisha and Bloom. Your ran your hands through your hair, pulling the long strands up onto a bun, the bobble on your wrist secured it in place.

“Actually, I could use some help.”

So the plan was set. Bloom would stay and distract Saul and your mother. They’d been keeping such a close eye on her lately that they were certain she was going to be the one to do something stupid and reckless. Oh how the roles had reversed. Aisha and Stella were coming with you, you needed Stella there to help you ground your powers. Like you’d always said, she was the light to your dark and vice versa. Aisha, well, she was a fucking powerful and smart fairy, couldn’t hurt to have her on your side.

Sneaking behind a wall just off the courtyard, you held your hands out allowing smoky black tendrils of magic flow freely from your shaking fingers. The portal opened and with one last look back at all the fear and chaos inside, you stepped through.

-Saul’s POV-

We got back to the school just in the nick of time. The courtyard was full of scared, fear fulled fairies and Specialists and all Saul could think of was his girl and why the fuck she wasn’t in the courtyard with the rest of the students.

His heart beat rapidly as he gave orders and handed out weapons and armour to every student he could. He was alerted to Y/N’s presence when he heard screaming and panicked cries from across the room. She was helping her friends carry Harveys kid, his torso clawed away at by the hands of a burned one.

He was too distracted, he couldn’t go to her straight away people would notice, even amongst all this chaos, they still had to be clever and careful. He was busy talking to Sky, still trying to keep his girl in his sights but he failed. Now seemed the only chance that he might get to tell Sky the truth about Asterdal and that’s what he did. How he killed Skys father to save himself after Andreas turned on him. Sky didn’t want to believe and he was pissed, but it needed to wait until after. After the burned ones weren’t knocking on their front door. He looked around again for you, wondering where the hell you were.

“Are you seriously looking for Y/N after you told me you killed my father?” Sky seethed, rightfully pissed off. “I don’t know where she is but she asked me to tell you she loves you, and she’s sorry, she said she would have said it herself but it would have been too obvious.” With that Sky walked away to the front line before Saul could ask him what she meant by sorry.

The burned ones were banging on the doors, windows, you name it. They had arrived. Farah parted the crowd of scared students like the red sea, Marco behind her telling people to keep their nerve. Saul joined them at the front armed and ready. Screams erupted as glass fell from the towering ceiling above. A fairy shot fire from his hands directly at the burned one who had fell through the roof. It charged it’s way towards the specialists, swords drawn, they charged forward, only to stop when the burned one changed coarse, leaving the students behind.

“What the hell was that.” Terra panicked and looked around for more signs of burned ones.

“They’re all moving together… like they’re looking for something.” Saul looked at Farah, realisation dawning on his face.

“Where’s Y/N?”

-Your POV-

The air was colder than usual. Maybe it’s because deep down you were scared shitless and the nerves were getting the better of you.

“Y/N you do know my mums gonna be here soon, with an actual army!” She ran after you, trying to keep up with your long strides.

“Stell, the burned ones have always been after me, from the start. I can’t stand back and not do anything. I know how to stop them, I’ve had the power all along, I’ve just been too afraid to use it. I need to draw on more power than I ever have before. That’s why I need you both here, so you can try and stop me if it gets out of control.”

You could hear the burned ones getting closer, their menacing growls echoing through the spindly trees. Shadows bounced around the outskirts of the space you were standing in. You didn’t realise you were crying until Stella brushed your tears away. Both fairies grabbed your hands.

“If anything happens, tell Saul I love him. I’ll never stop loving him even in death.”

You gave Stella one last hug and did the same with Aisha, taking a deep calming breath you stepped forward, your heavy boots squelching in the waterlogged field that overlooked the school you’d come to call home.

When you knew your friends were far enough away you opened up you senses, giving in to the power you possessed. Your eyes turned black and your body began to slowly lift from the ground, arms outstretched. You could feel the power swirling inside you. It’s presence made you gasp. Around you, a smoky black fog, your body was consumed in it, a visual representation of the power you held. You looked down to your fingers, to your body and smiled.

Fairies used to have wings but they had lost the ability to perform transformation magic so adapted and didn’t need them anymore. So it came as a surprise when you felt giant wings burst from your back, glowing black and white. This is what it meant to be the answer to all the realms problems. You smiled again, tears threatening to spill due to the feeling of being whole. This is who you were meant to be all along and now you had finally found yourself.

The burned ones sprung from the depths of the forrest. Your boot clad feet hit the ground with a thud and your smoky, bright wings fanned out behind you. You were ready. They charged towards you, their growls filling the air. Your hands shot out and your black tendrils of magic shot into their chests, ripping out the spark inside them. You watched as one by one they crashed to the ground around you. Their monster like growls no longer.

Your wings retracted and you breath deeply. The burned ones that had once surrounded you no longer deformed and burned. But there, laying on the ground, humans.

“What the fuck?”

You heard running footsteps and looked up dizzily to see your mum and Saul running towards you in worry.

They stopped, looking around at what had unfolded. “Well done Y/N.” You mother was tearing up, shocked, happy and proud. You stumbled towards Saul. He ran to you, swooping you up in his arms.

“Farah what’s wrong with her?!” Saul was panicked, brushing the hair back from your sweaty forehead. Your mothers hand came to rest on Sauls shoulder.

“It’s okay Saul, she’s just weak, let’s get her back to the school.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------

That night, the lights came back on in Alfea. Your friends surrounded you as you lay in bed, all talking about the events that had unfolded and how you had earned your wings. How Stella and Aisha had helped you in your time of need. How Terra and Musa had helped save Sam, and how Bloom had helped distract everyone to make the whole plan a possibility.

As the girls chatted and laughed, you zoned out, looking around at each of them. You couldn’t believe how lucky you were. A girl from no where in England, finding out she was a fairy, finding an amazing group of friends who she knew she’d have for life. Finding Saul, finding her mother, finding herself. She couldn’t help the happy tears that fell.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh my goshhhhhh! I hope you liked this chapter! I really enjoyed writing it! So much dramaaaa <3

As always please let me know what you thought! Comment, like, re-blog and if you wanna be in the tag list let me know!

CHAPTER 17.1 -------- CLICK HERE

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bccfggffbgv · 2 years

Note

(Thankfully, the place the Neo Hive and Shroobs battled wasn’t close to any settlement…but both sides did not brother to keep their battle hidden. Needless to say, once this was to Atlas, everyone would be thankful that there are new allies familiar with both forces. Meanwhile, Raven wasn’t the only of the Brawnen clan left beyond her estranged brother (who was only so by blood at this point)…but the few left beyond her where far from the numbers they once had. Needless to say, with what Enchantress Pink had said already also in place, Raven was left with a lot to think about. Elsewhere, Entropy had found the frozen Grimm Dragon (which he noticed was technically a Wyvern in terms of body build, not that it mattered), and thus the unstable drone got an idea that, even to him, was utterly crazy. Back with the heroes, Jackrow and Azem where thankfully able to A. Keep Ironwood and the council from excessive panic and paranoia upon hearing everything about what the heck just happens (and noting that the nightmarish animatronics that Ruby found where sent there accidentally by Wario (Wario: How was I supposed to know they’d land here?) and B. Forge an alliance with them. Upon hearing that Azem was very familiar with dealing with corrupt individuals of both literal and, to their interest, metaphorical kinds, however, there was a request to the heroes to do what they could to deal with any they could find, with Winter (who was in the meeting as an assistant to Ironwood) semi-subtly pointing to an SDC-branded Building seen in a model of the city brought in for the meeting while helping to explain the specific details of the request. It didn’t take long for either Azem or Jackrow to clock in to what she meant. When the two heroic individuals in question went to rally everyone who came over, they noticed the positive interactions with those present and thus got the idea to bring the natives in question along, which would also help with handling needing a guide. Elsewhere, Exdeath waited patiently for Salem’s response to his proposal, with The Auditor similarly waiting patiently, simply passing the time by organizing some plan components he helped make.)

(A.N. Quick thing, what’s the deal with Enchantress Pink beyond being a more enigmatic but still trusted ally of the heroes?)

(Note: Her job as an angel makes her both a guardian to all children and a judge to all kinds of sinners. Mr. Black personally hired her specifically due to her background/origins and pure heart when she was still alive.)

Salem, after returning: After some considerable thinking, I have decided to agree upon this alliance but on the condition of you not controlling "My" grimm anymore.

Exdeath: But of course! The void has taught me to always keep my word with potential allies. *Emerald was the first to agree that this was a bad idea with Exdeath constantly talking about this "Void" and with one of the other lieutenants arriving...The questionably sane Fawful with his strange way of talking*

Fawful: Like mold on the bread of a sandwich, we shall ruin the appetite of our enemies~!

(Meanwhile with Entropy)

Entropy: Let's just hope that this doesn't kill me...*He had then tore out the heart of the dragon, and, absorbed, it...Fortunately for him (and unfortunately for everyone else), it had mutated him to be even more powerful than ever with grimm attributes and abilities but at the cost of being slightly weaker to ice attacks...His maniacal laughter was heard throughout the forrest* FINALLY, I'M CLOSER TO KILLING BOTH PREDAKING AND MERCURY~!

(Meanwhile with the heroes)

*While everyone was getting to know each other more and Eda was secretly planning on adopting a few more kids, Ozpin had felt a disturbance within the world*

Ozpin: Oscar...I fear that the worst has yet to come...

*While that was happening, Mitchel Slasher had infiltrated the SDC ranks while disguised as a face obscuring helmet wearing guard and placed the Glitchtrap virus within their systems*

(Meanwhile with The Grave Walkers)

E. Princess Shroob: While I'm flattered you brought some of my servants back, I'm still insulted that you made them obsessed with your cult...

Dark Star Spirit: And why do you waste my power's potential on bringing back these feeble warriors from this realm?...*He side eyes a feline assassin, a blind minotaur like creature, a beastly crocodile humanoid creature, an undead bandit with blade like fingers, a robotic swordswoman with detachable limbs, and a heavily armored spartan*

Victor Hex: Firstly, it's not a cult, it's the true way of life. Secondly, they're much more powerful thanks to your magic~!

#Multiversal Fusion #crystalverse #Chaos-verse

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extremelyblackandwhite · 4 years

Text

handmaid - 04

PAIRING: mob!sebastian stan x ingenue!reader

WARNINGS: age gap

A/N: i’m sorry i’ve taken so long to update, i’ve started my online internship and for the past 24 hours i’ve been looking at papers about various medicines so i had to give myself a break 😂 hope you enjoy this one xx

NEXT CHAPTER

Sebastian hated to miss the opportunity to see Y/N go through a whole lot of various dresses, however, working with clueless idiots meant he had to drive straight to his place for an impromptu meeting. It was boring to say the least and at the end of it, he didn’t feel like getting dressed up with a silly mask and host a ball in the reception of some sleezy hotel. However, appearances mattered and although most people had known he was bethroted prior to before him even knowing him, he still had to parade around with Genevieve as if they were the happiest couple on Earth. They weren’t and they would never be.

For starters, Sebastian despised the tactics applied by the Forrests when running their business with absolute trust in everyone who worked for them. Additionally, both his prior encounters with Genevieve had been awful and none of them were really interested in keeping the facade of happy couple behind closed doors.

However, he had to admit that having Y/N parading around as a direct consequence of his future wedding was no bad thing. He had a sly smile as he sat against his chair, thinking about her. He found her delightfully naive and extremely sheltered for someone who followed Gwen around like a lost puppy. There was something extremely captivating in seeing a woman who was untainted by the environment she lived in and due to his extremely good sharp-eye he had mostly memorised her reactions. How she would bring her hand up to only her left cheek when she felt embarrassed, the constant lip bitting which on its own could possibly attract all the unwanted attention in a room, the constant pulling and smoothing of her clothing fabrics whenever standing next to someone of power ... If it was an act, well, then she was a very good actress.

He would’ve probably been stuck in the mindless act of thinking about someone who’d probably run to the hills at the mere thought of being intimate with him, had it not been for the clock in the wall showing that it was already time for him to possibly get ready.

Sebastian got changed out of his suit into a new one, grabbing the mask on his way out and proceeded to pace the floors of his living room expecting Gwen. Of course, part of him was only pacing the floors and not in the car because he wanted to take a quick peak at his fiancée’s handmaid but he wouldn’t admit that to himself. At least out loud. This was quickly thrown out the window once he saw Gwen coming down the stairs in her red gown, black satin mask in place, followed by her bodyguard and not by Y/N.

- I see your shadow is missing. - he asked in a teasing manner, something Gwen didn’t take too lightly, rolling her eyes as per usual.

- Y/N is getting ready. Can we please go to the car and get this charade over and done with? - the heiress huffed, holding the fabric of her dress slightly up so she wouldn’t trip on it. Sebastian decided not to comment on it, thinking that poking the lion would only make it for a worse evening, so he ordered one of the countless bodyguards he kept in his penthouse to drive Y/N. The man nodded, as men usually did whenever he gave them orders and with that Sebastian left with his bride-to-be.

Y/N on the other hand had finished setting her hair in place, sliding in a few star shaped pins onto her hair which had been a gift from Dan once she graduated from university along with Gwen. She extremely cherished them and thought there was no better occasion to wear them but tonight.

Her eyes slightly gazed onto her reflection in the mirror, thinking she looked exactly like what she used to believe princesses looked like in fairytales and couldn’t help but slightly smile at the sight. Once she stepped out of the room, ready to supposedly join the rest of the people downstairs, she was met with another bodyguard who gestured for her to follow him.

- Did Gwen leave already? - she questioned, her instinct of making sure her friend was safe on the back of her head screaming at her.

- Miss Forrest and Mr. Stan left early. - he replied in the usual monotonous voice that didn’t leave room for many questions. - We shan’t take too long.

Meanwhile, Sebastian was having a tedious time. Wherever he turned to there were either people trying to lend money from him, talk business with him, or congratulate him on his engagement, all things that made him want them removed from his inner circle. Yet again, he can’t just get rid of people because they’re a nuisance, usually they have to give him a reason, which after some time they always do.

He knew exactly what he had signed up for when he agreed to this ludicrous show off party, he had signed up for a night of fake kissing and fake laughing all while wearing a stupid last minute Phantom of the Opera mask he had from the last time he’d seen it. It was a pretty boring night except for the champagne flutes that luckily seemed to find him whenever he felt like putting a bullet into someone’s head for talking too long.

Contrarily, Genevieve seemed to thrive in these functions as shown by the way that she was introducing herself in several conversions and, very unprofessionally, flirting with various mob family’s bodyguards. It wasn’t like Sebastian really cared, having a unfaithful wife wasn’t something new, however he still would like her to be at least respectful.

His eyes roamed over the crowd, champagne flute in hand, as he noticed the commotion that settled at the entrance of the room. From the door emerged one of his bodyguards and in front of him Y/N. He couldn’t help but stare at her, his brain explaining that behaviour by telling him he could do so as he had paid for the dress. She stood slightly smaller than the crowd due to her constant habit of looking down but he could still see her perfectly clear in a ankle length beige dress covered in lines of pearls which matched her equally beige shoes. Just like everyone else she had a masquerade mask wrapped around her face with a bow made of black ribbon.

The moment Gwen set her eyes on her friend, she was pulling her into her own social circle leaving Sebastian to observe her. As per usual, she didn’t speak much unless addressed and even when addressed she would bounce the conversation to someone else, hands always slightly tucked in front of her stomach, and a look that told him she probably disliked this party more than she did.

Social gatherings weren’t Y/N’s cup of tea, despite going to at least more than a hundred of them in her life time. She always thought them to be extremely fake with people putting on several different personalities throughout the evening in order to entice various upper ranked mobsters.

- We must discuss business someday, Miss Forrest. - one man pulled Genevieve away from Y/N leaving her by her lonesome. Her fingers drew over the top of the champagne flute looking around at everyone. Some people she knew, some were men close to Mr. Forrest with their new wives, some their sons. There were some people she had seen from hit lists and others from birthday presents. Her eyes laid on Mr. Stan and his perfectly tailored navy suit. His posture screamed power, dominance and authority without even trying, even with that matte white half mask.

She cleared her throat, turning her head to face the opposite wall once her gaze was met by his. Y/N couldn’t stare at him, he made her nervous without saying a single word. Funny thing was, she did not know why he made her nervous. Sure he was a mob boss with probably a few kills under his belt but she had grown up around that type of people, yet he made her nervous. He made her feel like digging her own hiding hole whenever he look slightly in her direction.

- Miss Y/N ... - came a voice from behind her, making her drop the flute on the ground. Despite the noise, no one turned their head, too busy in their own conversation. - Didn’t mean to frighten you.

- Mr. Sta... Sebastian, good evening. - she took a step back, noticing how close he was to her. He was close enough she could smell his cologne, the type of smell that made a girl want to wrap herself in a guy’s scented clothing. - I spoke with the saleswoman and she said I could return the dress later.

- It’s a gift, angel. You should keep it, it suits you.

- This is the type of gift you give to Gwen, not to me. - she smoothed over the fabric of her dress.

- Miss Forrest has enough dresses as it is. Speaking of gifts ... - his hand went to his pocket, pulling a golden chain. - I believe this is yours.

- My necklace. - her heart swelled up as she saw him hold her golden necklace. Mindlessly, she wrapped her arms around him, taking him by shock. Normally, he’d have the head of whomever tried to hug him. - I can’t believe you found it.

- You dropped it on the club. I’ve been meaning to return it but it passed my mind. - he handed it over to her who like an over excited child getting a new piece of clothing for Christmas, immediately wrapped it around her own neck. However, it was slightly hard for her to clasp the necklace herself which automatically and mindlessly led Sebastian to hold both ends of the chain in his hands, her hand slightly grazing his as it left the clasp and rested upon her abdomen.

It was a rather easy clasp leading the moment to be over in less than a second if so, however his hands instead of returning to stand politely over his pockets, he instead left them softly against her warm shoulders, a stark contrast to his cold ones. This contrast did not go unnoticed by her, her skin trembling and shivering at the touch that seemed to last a whole millennium.

- Uhm ... - she cleared her throat, slowly turning around to face him. - Ho...how are you enjoying your evening?

- I would rather be doing anything else, Miss Y/N. - he chuckled darkly, grabbing another flute as a tray passed by.

- You should call me Y/N if I’m to call you Sebastian. - she walked alongside him, through crowds of people which like the red sea to Moses would part so he could pass through. - It’s only fair.

- Fairness isn’t exactly my strongest suit, angel.

tag list: @sideeffectsofyou @lilya-petrichor @xoxohannahlee @irespostthingsiwanttoseelater

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan/reader #sebastian stan/you #sebastian stan/y/n #mob!sebastian stan #mob boss!sebastian stan #au!sebastian stan #mafia!sebastian stan #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan fanfic #sebastian stan drabble

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jadelotusflower · 3 years

Text

Robin Hood Rewatch: 1x13 A Clue: No

“Previously on” recaps can be annoying, but there is an art to it and I love a good one. This is a very, very good one, summarising the last episode with ramping tension as the music builds, then cuts to a different take of the last scene as the theme song starts, and we’re into the opening credits.

This is a long one, so it’s going under the cut:

Guy estimates that the “inner circle” of Robin’s gang is “a dozen at the most” and I find it very funny that neither he nor Vaisey have twigged that it’s always the same five people around him. What’s more annoying than funny is that they don’t know how many are in the “outer circle” because that really should have been A Thing in the show (Forrest and Hanton should have come back to guest star! I will never let this go!) After all, we see Little John with more men in the first episode, there are other outlaws in the forest/across the shire that are either working with Robin, or pose a risk to them, and I wish this had been explored.

Djaq manhandling and holding her sword to Pitts’s throat - I love Djaq.

The first arrow Robin shoots is intended for Vaisey, but one of the guards inconveniently walks in front and gets it in the chest. The second arrow is intended for Vaisey as well but he ducks (”my tooth!”) so we can’t fault the writing for a credible attempt at Why Doesn’t Robin Just Kill The Sheriff, because in this scene at least, he tries.

Bye Pitts. You certainly were.

I actually really love this scene (which probably seemed odd given the high body count), but Robin drawing his sword and charging, with Much, Djaq, and John backing him up to avenge Marian’s apparent death/make a final stand, as the music shifts from the jaunty Rescue Theme to Marian’s Theme, just gets me every time.

Although thanks to the cast commentary, I can’t unsee Djaq flipping that guy over her head twice, but hey, it’s a badass move. Clearly they didn’t shoot enough coverage of this fight, because we get the same action from several different angles.

Other than the flashback in episode 8, I think this is the only time we see Robin in Crusader mode, and just how lethal he (and the gang) can be when unleashed and with nothing to lose. Even when the enemy retreats Robin remains kind of wild-eyed with rage unsated, and it takes a beat for him to snap out of it. It’s symbolism time - he sticks his sword in the ground and leaves it there, and we don’t see it again this episode (or much in season 2).

There’s some nice acting going on from everyone in this scene - just utter exhaustion, Allan and Will oblivious to why the rest are so distraught, Much taking it upon himself to tell them but can’t say the words, and Robin with the finality of “she’s dead.” Their faces!

Djaq is still holding two swords as she enters the cave, which is a nice character beat - no doubt the fight also brought back unpleasant memories/triggers for her, and she remains on edge, for the moment unwilling to give up her defences even when the threat is gone.

I really love this scene too (the gang mourning Marian) and I think it’s quite deftly written - Djaq’s immediate reaction being the importance of a quick burial (as per Islamic tradition), Robin trying to keep it together, attempting to ask John/Will to build a coffin but unable to, so deflecting to ask Djaq to prepare Marian’s body, before trying twice again; John soothing him and taking charge. Will’s single tear and speaking of Marian’s goodness. Much responding with “Good? Oh, she was... She was...” looking to Robin because of course his thoughts are for Robin’s grief before his own, and also that his own relationship with Marian was complex. Allan: “She was alright...yeah” that says so much, and of course John’s “Her, we liked.” Again, some fine acting, kudos everyone.

“I loved her and I never told her” is ironic because Robin still won’t tell her until halfway through the next season, and if he had in the aftermath of her apparent death he could have spared himself a lot of the angst of the rest of the episode. But of course he doesn’t tell her, doesn’t learn from this moment, because emotions are hard, and sometimes we make the same mistakes over and over again.

I really love that it’s Allan that notices that Marian is alive, and his little “told ya” flourish.

Score note: while Marian is “dead” her Theme is strings, when she opens her eyes, it’s back to the guitar.

Guy’s guilt in finding out his impending marriage to Marian is based on false pretenses - would he still have forced the marriage if he’d known that from the start?

Djaq still has her two swords as they take Marian back to Knighton.

Guy, if your first instinct when told Marian is not at home is that she’s run away rather than marry you...maybe take a hint? “She cannot run from me” is a big yikes, and this confuses me as to Guy’s motivation in this scene. Did he intend to tell Marian the truth, but then convince himself otherwise (because “the excitement of the wedding” =/= “the wedding excites her”), but then why so angry when he thinks shes run? The difference between getting someone go/being left, I suppose.

Illness is a perfectly plausible explanation for delaying the wedding that no one seems to think of.

Edward is actually pretty bang on in this scene with Robin from a father’s perspective, telling him to let Marian go if he cannot stop it, and do the right thing. On the other hand...

“I am sick of doing the right thing” is why Robin is such a compelling character for me - because it is hard to always be good, to be held to that higher standard, and make the unselfish choice. I enjoy narratives that explore that, and this show is surprisingly unflinching about it, exemplified by:

The next scene, which is one of the most emotionally brutal/hard to watch of the entire show, in which Robin lashes out and does everything to drive Much away, including calling him “a pox” and a “small man” until Much’s heart visibly breaks.

Now I don’t want to excuse Robin here, because he is objectively awful to someone who doesn’t deserve it, who is trying to give him support but also telling him some much needed hard truths (even if it is slightly self-serving, which is what what seems to set Robin off). But at the end of the day, if he loves Marian he needs to accept that it is her choice to marry Guy, to “do the right thing” to (she thinks) protect her father - and later of he does just that. For now Edward and Much are both right, it is more important for him to try and protect the king from Vaisey, because if he is ousted and Richard back on the throne so many lives would be improved, including the people of Locksley. But Robin has been pushed to breaking point all season, and has now snapped and can’t see reason, but is stuck in his own grief/rage.

But unlike previously, when Robin said regrettable things in the heat of the moment and then immediately took them back, this is a calculated attack designed to hurt Much the most, because he loves Robin so much that it takes A Lot to push him away. It’s a bold move to make your hero so unlikable in such a moment, because Robin really is unforgivably cruel here, and trust the audience to understand why. I mean, I don’t want to bang on about the PTSD, but it’s (partly) the PTSD, based on a triggering, precipitating event causing a self-destructive spiral. Robin needs some Ye Olde Therapy.

For all the talk about Robin getting his title and lands back, nothing is said about what happens to Gisborne once he does, other than that they can’t prove he was the one who tried to assassinate Richard. Because really, Richard probably would believe Robin even though the tattoo was burned away, and Guy’s certainly committed other crimes that could be testified to just like they’re intending for Vaisey - and let’s be real, it’s not like a king needs evidence to order someone’s death (hello, season 2 finale). Boom - Guy executed, marriage to Marian annulled, problem solved!

So, the scene between Marian and Guy, in which Marian is more concerned with whether or not Guy tried to kill the king than the fact that he stabbed her. But its understandable, because Marian thinks there’s no way out that doesn’t risk her father’s life, and it’s easier to convince herself that maybe Guy didn’t do it to make the best of things. I think she does have some kind of feelings for him, or is at least moved by his feelings for her, and believes if nothing else she can influence him/continue working from the inside; giving up the mantle of the Nightwatchman but doing the same work (in a different way) as Lady Gisborne.

And then it’s Robin/Marian angst, round 3, and it’s a far cry from their interaction in the cave milliseconds away from “I love yous” - in both tone and body language they’re back in defensive positions talking past one another. The tension, it be thick.

Marian is making her best rationalisation with “deprived of love” and Robin not at all buying the Woobification 101. Once she tells him her decision to marry Guy, he accepts it, but it’s Marian’s reaction that’s telling, she’s surprised that he doesn’t argue, deep down she wants him to fight for her, to say that the real reason she shouldn’t marry Guy is because he loves her. It’s quite a contrast from the previous scene where Guy was very open about how he feels about her, while Robin deflects, but while she was conflicted about Guy trying to kiss her, she’s frustrated, disappointed, and angry when Robin leaves.

But really, this is rather unfair of Marian, because Robin did already declare himself in the cave (”we should be together”) without her reciprocation, so expecting him to take the first step again without any encouragement is a bit much.

Would a depressed person sit slumped against a tree all night?

“But by taking Marian in holy wedlock, I will wash away those crimes. Her pure heart will cleanse mine.” Yeah...not going to touch that one. I appreciate that there’s a lot going on with Guy and many, many people find it compelling, but I’m afraid it’s not really a narrative that interests me.

Speaking of pure hearts: Much. Faced with the same choice he was counseling Robin on, but with the additional wrinkle of knowing the king’s an imposter, he still decides to stop the wedding. “Her heart belongs to another” is A Moment and I don’t know exactly why but I find his very soft pleas following this and calling her “my lady” very affecting.

She’s beauty and she’s grace, she punched Guy in the face.

“A trap. I knew it.” I haaaaate this line. NO YOU DIDN’T KNOW IT ROBIN YOU KNEW NOTHING OF THE KIND IF YOU HAD KNOWN YOU WOULD BE EVEN MORE OF A DICK FOR LEAVING UGGGHHHH.

“We can’t be seen together” Right in front of my salad two guards on front gate duty, who get front row tickets to the kiss. Look at them! They’re right there! This show drives me absolutely bonkers sometimes.

I do love this dress though.

“An audience with the king has been suspended!” Going out on one last pun.

Regardless, I really love this episode. Despite the lack of fallout from the emotional wringer they all went through, I can’t help but smile when the gang does their silly little jump for joy at the end.

#robin hood bbc #robin hood rewatch #1x13 a clue: no #long post

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oliverwxod · 4 years

Text

The hardest part is letting go (Part 2) - Geralt imagine

Pairing: Geralt x reader

Warnings: swearing, mentions of sex.

Summary: Part 2 to this

"Another day, another slay" Jaskier mumbled under his breath, strumming a small musical tune , "wait no... Another day... Another... Another..."

"You okay?" Y/n chuckled to herself, throwing Jaskier a look. "You've been mumbling for the past 10 minutes"

Jaskier looked up at her, meeting her eyes with a sigh.

"I need some inspiration" he huffed.

"Things got too boring for you?" Y/n asked, raising an eyebrow up at him.

"Oh- no - that's not what I meant I just-" y/n laugh at his stuttering.

"I'm not offended" she laughed "it's fine, I'm bored too".

"You should be glad" Geralts voice came from the trees, the two of them squinting to see him appear out of the mist that had not cleared due to the early morning sun that was still trying to rise and cut through the clouds so a new day could begin.

"Glad for what?" Y/n questioned, staring at the Witcher. He looked like he hadn't even slept last night. Y/n guessed that he didn't, not when he had paid to spend the night with a woman.

"That you're bored" he spoke, staring at her briefly before looking away.

"But being bored is so- boring" she complained, stretching her arms out and yawning just to make her point stronger.

Jaskier let out a laugh, Geralt once again hated how Jaskier was looking at Y/n. Like she had hung the moon and the stars, he'll even all the other planets that existed up their. Geralt scoffed under his breath.

"Lets move" he grunted, swinging himself on to his horse with ease, whereas Y/n and Jaskier both struggled with theirs.

"Where to?" Jaskier spoke "another great Witcher adventure, maybe I'll get my inspiration"

"Why don't you write a song about me" Y/n spoke, a teasing gleam in her eyes that spoke trouble. She flashed a quick grin to Geralt who glared at her.

"What makes you think that I haven't already?" Jaskier teased back. He hadn't ever had the confidence to ever come up with a comeback to her teasing before. A spark lightening up in Y/n's eyes that had Geralt grunting again in distaste.

"Can I hear it?" She asked, smirking at the bard.

"Nope".

"What? Why not?" She whined "please Jaskier"

"I'm going to save it" he spoke proudly.

"Save it for what?" She asked, confusion closing over her face and curiously running through her. She was eager to hear it, a song written about her by a bard. A talented one at that.

"For when the times right for others to hear it, for they will all fall in love with the mighty Y/n once they do. And I don't think you're ready for all the people to love you" Y/n let out a laugh.

"Well now I really want to hear it".

"Would you two stop this wanton talk, " Geralt spoke harshly. He hated it. Couldn't deal with the bards constant talking and Y/n's teasingly. He knew she was only doing it because she was bored.

"Just because you barely speak doesn't mean we can't. It's just teasing Geralt" she spoke, her voice didn't hold any kind of annoyance though.

"Watch it" he glared in response to her first comment.

"Oh mysterious Wicther, why do though not speak" y/n spoke exaggeratedly, calling out to the Forrest, arms spread open in exclamation. "Why does though not laugh or play"

Jaskier started to strum a tune making her laugh, before he carried on, turning her words into a song.

"Very funny" Geralt huffed, glaring once again at the two of them who had both broken out into fits of giggles. "The two of you are children" he spoke gruffly, turning his nose up at them.

Y/n rolled her eyes when she met Jaskiers eyes, the two of them sharing a smile as Geralt had ridden ahead, now leading them.

"Soooo" Jaskier spoke, it had been quiet for nearing an hour as they all rode, the pathways were widening suggesting they would probably be reaching a village soon.

"Has anybody ever been in love?" Y/n coughed, a laugh spluttering from her lips at the question.

"Why does that amuse you dear Y/n?" Jaskier asked, smirking slightly at her .

"Just wasn't expecting such an - outrageous question"

"You think love is outrageous?" Jaskier asked shocked. Geralt found himself actually listening to their conversation with interest this time.

"Of course it is" she spoke.

"What makes you say that?" The bard asked, slowing down.

"Because I imagine it to hurt, a lot" she said quietly. "Because there's going to be a point where the person you love is going to love someone else"

"That's a depressing way to look at it" Jaskier stated. Silence falling over the trio.

Geralt was a little shocked by her words, y/n seemed to be a joyful soul, much like Jaskier, he thought she would easily be the kind of person who believed in love, the kind of girl that would want to get married and have a family. The conversation died there, the only sounds being those of the silence in the forest and the chirping of birds and distant chatter from a nearby village.

"There was once a man" y/n spoke gaining the attention of the two men and breaking the silence. "He wanted to prove his love to his wife. So he went on an adventure, He climbed the highest mountain, swam the deepest seas and slayed a silver dragon. Do you know what his wife did?" She left the question open, neither Geralt or Jaskier knowing but staring at her curiously.

"She left him" she said, her voice quietening "she left him because he was never there."

Geralt stared at her, figuring out what she was trying to say. The way her posture had changed and the way she had cowered in on herself allowed him to understand.

"Your parents" he said out loud. Y/n's head whipped round to his direction, meeting his eyes.

"Yes. My mother left my god forsaken awful Father" she said "and me"

"I'm sorry-" Jaskier started. "Don't be" she glared at him.

"She was a coward and he was an asshole" Geralt was unsure for the first time ever what to say. He wasn't good with emotions especially other people's emotions. He didn't want to say the wrong thing and upset her.

"I met her" he spoke up. Y/n stared at him once again, speechless. "She paid me"

"For what? To kill a monster because once again she was too much of a coward?" Y/n spat a new spiteful side revealing itself.

"No. To take you away from there." He said plainly. This was the explanation y/n had been waiting for since she had been traveling with the Wicther after he turned up one day stating he had to protect her.

She had always assumed it was her Father who had given him the job of getting her out of the kingdom when the war started. Her father had said it was no place for a princess to be, one of the only good thing he had ever done was letting her leave win the Witcher.

She never knew it was because of her mother that the Witcher was actually there "Oh" she replied, in somewhat shock.

"She wanted you out of there, war or no war." Geralt said.

"Wait, you're a princess?" Jaskier spoke in shock. Both Y/n and Geralt momentarily forgot he was there, turning to see Jaskier jaw dropped open in surprise. "I've been- I've been travelling with a princess- talking to a princess-"

"Jaskier" Geralt spoke "not so loud out here in the open." Conscious of their surrounding he scanned the area briefly.

"Let's just keep moving" y/n spoke "we can talk about it later".

"So we established that Y/n will never fall in love but has the mighty Witcher or Rivia ever fallen in love" Jaskier asked changing the subject only a little. Geralt gave him a stern look before answering quickly and shortly.

"No"

"Not even once in your whole entire life time?" Jaskier asked.

"No" Geralt spoke again, clearly bored with the conversation.

"Witchers don't feel anything" y/n spoke. "Can confirm that" she whispered the last part under her breath but Gedalt still heard, but turned a blind eye to it.

"Well if neither of you don't believe in love than you sound perfect for each other" Jaskier said, oblivious to the silence and roaming thoughts he had created inside both of their heads with his simple words.

The two of them dared not to look at each other, awkwardness falling upon them as they silently follow Jaskier. A cloud of thought running through Y/n's mind.

Would she be sad if she ever had to leave Geralt? Yes. Would she be sad if Geralt fell in love with someone who was not herself? Yes. It was all starting to make sense. The way she felt under his stare, his brief touches. How she always felt queasy when Geralt spent the night with a woman in a inn room and she was left by herself. Shit. It was all falling into perfect sense. She liked him.

She liked the Wicther who did not feel anything. The man who barely spoke to her. The person who never seemed to care.

Similar thoughts were going through Geralts mind. Why he always felt so angry when Jaskier would talk to y/n, taking all her attention with him. How he would always feel that little bit more protective over her when anything or anyone even came near her. If explained why his heart skipped every time she mentioned that she didn't want to be traveling around all her life, a hint at the fact she would have to leave at some point. Maybe even return to her kingdom if the war was won.

"A village" Jaskier spoke excitedly. Geralt looked up, briefly glancing at Y/n, seeing she was already looking at him in question. He looked away quickly before getting off his horse and walking further into the village.

People stared. Villagers stopped still, pointing, gossiping, watching them with caution and hostile glances. An inn was up ahead of them, not too far into the village. They could get some food and drink their, maybe even a bed each for the night.

----------------------------

"Do you have three beds for the night?" Jaskier asked the inn keeper politely. "We've been travelling a while" The inn keeper stared at them before his eyes landed on Geralts, eyes narrowing slightly.

"Two" the inn keeper spoke cautiously. "We have two beds"

"That's fine"y/n spoke as Jaskier began to protest.

"Thank you Sir" No one spoke about the bed situation, leaving it for a later problem. Instead they were all too focused on getting food, sitting in a corner of the inn waiting with baited breaths and silence.

"So, Jaskier" y/n spoke. "Have you ever been in love?" She threw his question back at him, watching as the bard blushed.

"Uh- well"

"He falls in love every night he spends with a different woman" Geralt spoke. Y/n let out a laugh as Jaskier glared at the Witcher.

"I do not" he defended himself. He looked at the two of them seeing how neither of them seemed to believe him. "Okay, so maybe sometimes i do. But not all of them" he admitted.

"A bard that gets around. So how many?" Y/n asked in curiosity. She watched as he blushed once again.

"I'm not telling you that-"

"7" Geralt spoke.

"Actually it's 8 but- hey!" Jaskier said realising what just happened.

"Okay mr Witcher what about you"

"Too many to count Bard" he huffed, smirking at him.

"So like a hundred?" Jaskier asked, but only received a look. "More than that!" He exclaimed, his jaw dropping again. Y/n was silent hoping the question wouldn't turn to her.

But of course Jaskier being the curious person he was asked her.

"What about you?" Jaskier said, meeting her eyes. She frowned at him, before looking to Geralt for help, but she found he was looking at her too, his stare intense.

"Well- I've lived in a castle, surrounded by guards for my whole life so that would be zero".

"What!" Came Jaskiers reply first "you mean, you mean you've never?" She glared at him for bringing attention to it. Shaking her head through the blush that coated her cheeks, gaze flickering to stare at the table. She could feel his stare still on her, but she dared not to meet his eyes.

"Sorry y/n" Jaskier spoke "I shouldn't have asked you, I didn't mean to make you feel-"

"It's fine, I asked you first" she said. They were silent, no one knowing what to say. It was broken when the inn keeper came over, bring 3 bowls of hot stew and rolls of bread, the three of them thanking him gratefully.

They finished their food quickly, relishing in the warmth of the meal. It was only when they were finished that Y/n finally spared a look at Geralt, meeting his eyes and finding he was already watching her, his lip caught between his teeth. He didn't look away, not backing down from her gaze.

Y/n gave in, quickly looking away and engaging in conversation with Jaskier.

"I'm going to sleep" Geralt spoke standing up. "Jaskier, you take the other room" he spoke chucking him the key on the table. “Y/n you share my room, I'll take the floor".

"She can share mine-" Jaskier spoke.

"No" he said bluntly as he turned to leave. The two of them watched him retreat away to the door, silent for a quick moment before Jaskier turned to her with a shit eating grin.

"You don't see the way he looks at you do you?" Jaskier asked.

"What do you mean by that?" Y/n replied, confused.

"He wants you." he spoke, voice teasing him, y/n lightly hit his arm.

"Stop playing" she said.

"I'm not. That man” he spoke gesturing to where Geralt had disappeared to “wants to fuck you" Jaskier smirked.

Y/n was staring at the door the Witcher had gone through just moments ago, Jaskiers words burning into her head. How was she meant to face him now?

TAGS: @sdavid09 @c-s-stars @bitcheswithbrokenhearts @fandomhell97 @flowercrownsandmetallicarms @tdntu0 @soulmatelove96 @saelwen-the-shy-elf @momc95 @kingniazx @diab1a @whatanicepanohthatsjustme @marvels-gurl

#Geralt imagine #Geralt of rivia imagine #the Witcher imagine #Witcher imagine #Geralt x reader #Geralt smut #geralt fanfic #Witcher smut #Witcher fanfic #the Witcher fanfic #jaskier imagine #jaskier x reader

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outr-banks · 4 years

Text

Dark || Fic

(JJ Maybank x Reader)

In which JJ has had enough of your uncertainty on how you feel about him. Love is scary and frightening, so this leads to lies knowing it will hurt less than the truth. But, it doesn’t.

a/n: i’m so glad you guys enjoyed the last fic !! it truly makes my heart warm <3. writing this really got me in my feelings, who knew personal heartbreak can be written into words ! lol

inspired by: Slowing Dancing in the Dark by Joji (recommend listening while reading)

warning: angst, intense and sad. a slight mention of a toxic relationship, no happy ending :(

It’s dark, and not because it’s nearly midnight, but the eyes from the boy across the fire pit watched you and it sends you into a black hole. The atmosphere alone terrifies you.

For JJ to look at you this way is nothing new. But tonight, it makes you truly uncomfortable. You know you’re causing him pain, it’s visible. For awhile now, you and John B have been hooking up. It’s nothing serious, and the both of you made that very clear. You always ask yourself, how can someone do that when you’re clearly in love with someone else? But you’ve come to the terms it’s something you’ll never know. You’re aware that it isn’t fair to him, leaving JJ in the dark like that, but you couldn’t help it.

John B stands up from next to you and says goodnight, he places a warm hand on your shoulder and it causes you to shiver. Just knowing JJ saw it, makes your stomach turn. Your rendezvous with John B have been very lowkey, but the rest of the group knew something was going on.

The North Carolina winds brush swiftly through the air, but luckily the heat from the fire brings comfort. It’s silent, freakishly silent. Your heartbeat becomes louder than the outside noise, until JJ speaks up.

“You should be with him, I can’t compete.” The blonde boy clears his throat and then scoffs.

“JJ, please don’t. Let’s enjoy this fire.” You couldn’t bare to have this conversation with him. The fear within, overpowers the love you have for the troubled kid.

“I can’t! Don’t you understand? Just tell me how you feel about me. I just want the truth!” He yells, a trace of pain laces his voice.

You’re startled, he’s never acted this way before. You had small conversations about it, but he always remained quiet.

“I don’t want a friend, I don’t want to be your friend.” He adds, his words felt like bullets, and you can’t help but tear up. Although he’s still, his breaths are heavy as if he just finished running a marathon.

“JJ, don’t say that. You don’t mean that, right?” A small cry sits at the back of your throat.

“You look at me like I was someone else, as if i’m John B.” His hands make way to his hair and he lightly pulls on the strands. His fustration becomes evident and I knew he’s had it. He’s had it with your inconsistency and the uncertainty of your feelings towards him. You don’t blame him. He does nothing but nod his head.

“Why do you shut me out? Why can’t you make up your mind!” His voice raises once again and a dam breaks loose within your eyes. The sob that’s been stuck in your throat for months is set free.

“I don’t love you like that!” You scream desperately. It hurts even more to say such thing, knowing it’s a lie.

“That’s bullshit, and you know it!” JJ points his finger aggressively towards you and then flips the log he was once sitting on. You’re scared. Not because of him but the idea that you lost him for good. He runs into the dark of night and his shadow blends with the shapes of trees.

You follow him, anxious of where he might go. The sounds of your footsteps are swallowed by the forrest, and you scream for him after you spot him.

JJ turns around to face you, “don’t follow me! Or I swear to God I will kiss you right now. You’ve already made up your mind. Now leave me alone,” he shouts.

Your heart drops, “JJ I’m done fighting. I know now.” You can’t deny it anymore. You love him, and it’s scary but it’s now or never. Although, the idea of now seems scary to you, losing him frightens you even more.

“I-I lo-” You can’t find the words, and it fustrates you.

“Say it!” He charges at you but his body stiffens when he notices you’re in pain. His eyes water, he hates to see you this way. JJ remembers when you once told him the last time you said those words, it was nothing but a filler to escape the reality of a toxic relationship you were once in.

“I’m so sorry,” JJ’s words have soften and he carefully watches you.

“JJ, I can’t give you the answer you want.”

“So then let me say to you then, I love you. I’ve loved you since the day I met you. Everytime I see you with him, it kills me.” He anxiously waits for a response and his movements become frantic.

“I will make up all the times you can’t say I love you. I’ll wait for you. I will do it. I love you, I love so much.” His voice cracks, and his desperation takes over him. His hands gently lay on your cheeks. The pad of his thumb wipes away a tear that seeps out your eye.

“I’m sorry JJ.” You carefully grab unto his hands with your own and remove yourself from his touch. You can’t bare to look at him. A slight whimper leaves his lips and it shatters your heart to pieces.

Turning away from him causes you a pain you’ve never experienced before. A deep sadness and regret showers you. It’s unclear whether or not telling him the truth or a lie would hurt less. Nonetheless, you walk away leaving him in the dark.

#jj maybank #obx jj #jj x reader #jj obx #fanfic #outer banks fic #jj outer banks #rudy pankow #john b routledge #sarah cameron #kiara carrera #pope heyward #obx john b #obx pope #obx kiara #fan fics #rafe cameron #topper thornton

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pastelwitchling · 4 years

Text

Since you write Forlex for now,what about one in which Alex is sick and Forrest takes care of him?or a prompt in which Alex has to go to a military event and Maria and Liz offer to go with him and Alex says he has already arranged to go with Forrest as boyfriends(and ofc everyone is like 🤯) Whatever you want😃

This prompt is by @teamalexmanes.

i just had dental work and i’d KILL for a forlex fic if ur still taking prompts where forrest babies alex when he’s sick/injured

This prompt is by Anon.

***

“Lie down!”

“I don’t need to lie down!”

“Yeah?” Forrest said, setting the tray in his hands down. “How many fingers am I holding up?”

Alex squinted a moment. “Three.”

“Baby, I’m not holding any fingers up,” Forrest said patiently and gently pushed Alex back onto the couch by his shoulders. “Look, you said you didn’t want to be in bed; you’re not in bed. But you have to follow my rules now, okay?”

“This is ridiculous,” Alex huffed, turning over onto his back. “I’m not sick.”

“And yellow is totally my color,” Forrest muttered. He crouched beside Alex and pulled the blanket up to cover his exposed shoulder. “I know being taken care of isn’t really your thing or whatever, but I love taking care of people. Specifically, hot airmen who I want to get better quickly so that I can make out with.”

“I’ll make out with you now,” Alex said weakly, his eyes narrowed at a point over Forrest’s shoulder. “Well, one of you anyway.”

Forrest laughed. “I love you, but I’m not about to kiss you when you’re a walking fever.”

“I’m not sick.”

“Are too sick,” Forrest huffed, pecked Alex’s cheek, and frowned. He pressed his lips to Alex’s forehead, touched his neck, and went to get the thermometer. “You’re getting warmer. Here” – he stuck the thermometer into a defiant Alex’s mouth – “keep that under your tongue while I get more ice.” He then pointed a warning finger at a nearly dead Alex and firmly said, “Stay.”

“Stop enjoying this,” Alex said.

Forrest chuckled. “I don’t enjoy seeing you so tired, Cap,” he said over his shoulder. “I’m just glad that, for once, whether you like it or not, someone else can look after you.” When he came back to sit beside Alex, a soft smile tugged at his lips. “And I’m grateful it’s me.” He wrung out the cold rag and touched it to Alex’s forehead. Alex shuddered at the contact and snuggled deeper into his blankets and Forrest tried very hard not to wince at his obvious discomfort.

He leaned in and kissed Alex’s other cheek. “You’ll be better in no time, with me here.”

Alex mumbled incoherently. Forrest leaned his ear close to his lips. “What was that?”

“M’not sick.”

Forrest burst into laughter, falling against the couch and hugging Alex closely as he pressed his head deeper into the airman’s stomach. “Is this what it’s going to be like for the rest of our lives? You’re just going to ignore the blatantly obvious even if it kills you?”

Alex said nothing a moment, and Forrest feared he had gone too far. After all, they had never really talked about being together forever or what kind of relationship this was, but… Forrest couldn’t help it. He couldn’t imagine himself ever being with anyone else, and try as he might to deny it, there was only so long one could last without admitting the truth; there was no moving on after Alex Manes.

He didn’t even want to find anyone else, and while he hadn’t expected to fall this hard and this quickly for the airman, he didn’t think he’d ever be able to bear it if Alex decided to end things. Maybe, Forrest feared, he was considering it now.

“You knew what you were signing up for,” Alex suddenly grumbled as if just gaining the strength for it.

Forrest turned to rest his cheek on Alex’s waist, one hand on the back of Alex’s knees, the other on the top of his head, his fingers raking through the soft brown strands.

“I didn’t,” Forrest said. “I’m so confused. Everyone said you’d be a breeze to deal with.”

Alex laughed hoarsely, turning to stuff his face in the couch cushions. “You’re lying.”

“I’m not.”

“Yes, you are,” Alex smiled, and Forrest’s heart leapt.

“Fine, I’m lying,” Forrest said. “But I don’t care, because I love you. And I’m willing to put up with you for as long as you’ll have me.”

Alex scoffed faintly. “You want out of this, you’ll have to dump me, because I’m never breaking up with you.”

Forrest swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to will down the blush in his cheeks, but he couldn’t manage it. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Never,” Alex’s words turned to a mutter, his eyes fluttering shut. “Never, never, never….”

Forrest watched the airman until he drifted off to sleep, his cheeks and nose rosy from the fever, his lips turned to a cute pout, his long lashes curled and his exposed hand shivering. Forrest finally pulled back and kissed the airman’s fingers before covering them up with the blanket as well. He checked the thermometer and found the temperature had indeed risen another degree.

He brought another few blankets and tucked Alex in tightly. He dipped the cold rag in ice water again, wrung it out, and covered Alex’s forehead with it before he kissed Alex’s cheek softly and went to the kitchen to make him some soup. As it simmered, he came back to check on Alex and found Buffy had curled on top of him, as if trying to warm him the only way she knew how.

“He’s safe with us, isn’t he?” Forrest said softly to Buffy as he crouched beside Alex, his hand scratching behind the beagle’s ear, his eyes on his boyfriend. Forrest leaned forward with a sigh, his eyes fluttering shut as he pressed his and Alex’s foreheads together.

“Yeah, he’s safe with us.”

***

Hey, Dental Anon, I’m so sorry that this is late. I was watching the entire second season of The Umbrella Academy yesterday and I finished late at night. I hope you’re feeling better now though, and I hope you enjoyed reading this small fic as I really enjoyed writing it.

#alex manes #forrest long #forlex #forlex fanfic #forlex fic #forlex fanfiction #roswell new mexico #roswell nm #forlex angst #forlex fluff #tyler blackburn #christian antidormi

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echo-bleu · 4 years

Text

let them turn into a river

I've said I wouldn't write any more codas. Yet here I am. This works through some of my thoughts about Alex this season, which may not be everyone's cup of tea.

This also fills two prompts I got: "being given an unexpected hug, and stiffening, then melting into it" by @daffietjuh and "Alex has a breakdown over something mundane like what type of tuna to buy" (I think the original prompt was by @meneatyoghurt, and @rensbaratheon gave it to me).

[PTSD flashbacks, panic attack, mentions of abuse, discussion of possible dub-con (2x06)]

I'm fine. I'm completely fine, Alex repeats to himself as he wanders down the supermarket aisle in search of pasta.

It's not untrue, not exactly. He's certainly functioning a lot better than he was when he first got back from overseas, and his leg is doing rather well these days, even if it's now twinging in pain from the long day he's had. It's just that...he's had nothing but long, exhausting days in what feels like months. It's just that he's really, really tired.

And now he's in the store on a Saturday evening at eleven pm because the really, really nice guy he was hoping to try dating isn't willing to put up with his baggage. Alex can't blame Forrest. He wouldn't put up with it if he had a choice. He spent hours just staring at the bottom of his glass after Forrest left, until Maria slammed a bottle in front of him to get his attention and invited herself to lunch tomorrow.

“It's been a while since we really talked, Alex. I almost feel like you're the one avoiding me now.” The little progress Alex has made−according to his therapist, anyway−on setting his boundaries and asserting what he wants must have evaporated sometime during that night, because he didn't manage to say no.

Which means he needs to figure out what to cook. It's going to have to be meatball pasta, Alex decides. It's the only thing he can think of right now that's suitable for a guest but doesn't require a lot of preparation, and he has no wish to spend hours in the kitchen. He grabs his usual brand of pasta, grateful that he knows where it is by heart, and moves down the aisle to the sauce area.

The whole section of tomato sauce cans stares back at him.

Alex takes a step back to encompass the whole thing with his gaze, curses as the move twists his prosthesis enough for a sharp spike of pain to travel up his leg, and closes his eyes to center himself. Breathe. Everything's fine.

There are cans and boxes and bottles. Tomato sauce and pulp and juice. Several brands of each, with added flavoring and different sizes. How can there be dozens of different options? Alex is just looking for something to put in meatball pasta, it shouldn't be complicated.

He peers at the labels again, trying to wake up his brain enough to decide. But there's prices to think of, and ecology−what's better again, metal cans or cartons?−and so many different types and some of them are written in fucking Italian and he cannot choose. He stays frozen, two feet away from the shelves, vaguely rocking on his heels.

He can't breathe.

He can't breathe and he can't read the labels anymore because everything is suddenly out of focus. Fuck. He blinks, and inspires−and chokes, and wheezes, and shit, this shouldn't be so hard, why is he having a fucking panic attack in the middle of the deserted supermarket at 11 pm?

But he is, and thinking about how this should be simple, and why is he such a failure, is definitely not helping. He reaches out, tries to grab a can at random, and only succeeds in miscalculating and knocking several cans off the shelf. The noise they make hitting the floor is deafening.

Alex flinches, hard, and falls backward when it triggers another spike of pain up his leg and back. He hits the shelves at his back, probably knocking more things over−but he doesn't hear them fall over the buzzing in his ears. He feels the pain, though. The pain and the lack of air and the blackening at the edge of his vision.

Breathe.

He closes his eyes tight, letting himself fall on his ass on the floor and curl up. With his left knee under his chin, his right leg extended, he digs his nails into his palms. I can't do this. I can't.

He can't have Maria over, and pretend everything is fine. He can't talk to her about her relationship with Michael and about his own failed date. He can't look at her and forget about her kissing him, about the mess of limbs and emotions that followed, about how he can't feel anything but disgust toward himself ever since.

He can't.

Today has been a roller-coaster already. The elation he felt at the paintball park is long forgotten, replaced by wave upon wave of shame. At everything, at the mirror of himself he glimpsed in his father's eyes, at the way he froze with Maria, at the uncontrollably fear that gripped his gut when Forrest leaned in for a kiss, when he'd thought−he doesn't know what he'd thought. Only that in that moment, he felt a hand around his neck clearer than he has in months.

He feels it still, as he gasps for air. He spent every second in the hospital, from the moment his father first lost his temper, waiting for the hand to close around him. And yet he couldn't stop himself from catching his dad when he stumbled, even as he expected him to lash out. Why can't he even fucking put a stop to that? Let go of this monster for good, cut him out of his life?

Because he's a coward, that's why. He presses his back into the shelves until it hurts so much he gasps out. Pain. Focus. Breathe.

He's a fucking coward, so of course he's not good enough for someone like Forrest. Just like he'll never be good enough for Michael.

Michael. His mouth on him, again, after months of fantasizing about that. His warmth, his unique scent, his breathing−but they're not alone, and it's too much, too fucking much, that's not what he wants. Alex's skin crawls like that day, and he scrapes his nails at his palms, like he wants to rip it off.

No, no. No. He can't think about that again. He's in the middle of a fucking supermarket, for God's sake! He can't go down that hole.

Get a fucking grip.

Tomato sauce. That's what he needs. Nothing else. He can put everything aside, like how he's going to have to spend hours alone with Maria in his house tomorrow. After being touched by her that way. After watching her touch Michael that way.

He can't even get a handle on his thoughts long enough to remember the tricks his therapist gave him to get out of a panic attack. Counting. Right. One. Two.

No. Counting backward, or in threes, or the brain just takes over. But where to start? Twenty? Is that enough? A hundred? This is too much. How do you count in threes anyway?

Fuck.

Vaguely, he realizes the hand tightening on his throat is his own, his body desperately clawing at itself to breathe. Did his father mix his meds on purpose today? He wouldn't put it past him. But what would his purpose be?

Alex hates it. Being put in this position, the only son in town who is supposed to care for his ailing father. He avoids his childhood home as much as he can, but he's still the contact listed for him at the hospital. He hates watching Jesse Manes struggle to move around and feeling empathy he doesn't want, how somehow this is one more thing that brings them closer instead of separating them. Dammit. His dad in this position because he tried to kill Kyle, after torturing aliens−people−for decades. Alex shouldn't be feeling empathy for this man. He should have watched him fall on his face today, and not even moved a muscle.

Like his father watched him fall too many times after his injury.

Manes men don't show weakness.

Why couldn't he? Why is he such a coward that he can't separate the need to keep his father close, to monitor his actions and find out more about Project Shepard, from his own feelings?

Why can't he let the shadow of his father's abuse behind?

Making out with a hot guy in public is only made hotter when it pisses off all the bigots and the homophobes.

Alex wants to retch in shame.

“Alex!”

Alex can't tell where the voice comes from, but he feels someone coming close and that's what pulls him out of his panic. Reality brutally refocuses. He goes right from foggy, breathless dissociation to cold hypervigilance. He stills, releasing his left leg to be able to use it to swipe at someone's legs, and looks up very slowly.

It's Kyle, crouching down in front of him, frowning in worry. He may have called his name several times already, Alex doesn't know. He's surrounded by fallen cans of tomato, and one of them has burst and send red sauce flying everywhere.

Alex flinches away when Kyle tries to touch him. Breathing burns his lungs, but he forces the air in. Pain doesn't matter. Pain is good, right now, making him focus.

“Alex, what happened?” Kyle asks, like he's speaking to a small child. Or maybe Alex is imagining that. Everything is slow, unreal, his body unfeeling except for the pain.

He tries to make his mouth move to answer, but he can't. He shakes his head in frustration.

“Okay, okay, I won't touch you, alright? It's okay, there's no threat here. Do you know where you are?”

Alex nods, and dips his head, avoiding Kyle's eyes. Coming back to reality just means more shame. He's sitting in the middle of a supermarket, pants stained with tomato, panting and−for God's sake−crying. He's ridiculous.

“Good, you're with me,” Kyle continues. “Was it only a panic attack, or is there something medically wrong with you?”

Alex just stares at him, uncomprehending. He can't put the words together enough to make them make sense.

“Do you need to go to the hospital?” Kyle reformulates.

Alex shakes his head, and wills his hands to stop trembling.

Without taking his eyes off him for more than a second at a time, Kyle starts to pick up the intact cans of tomato off the floor. Giving him space, Alex understands. When he crouches down again, Alex feels stronger, more anchored, even if his whole body feels like cotton candy.

“Think you can get up now?” Kyle asks.

“Yeah,” Alex rasps out. He holds out a hand, though, rather than try to stand up by himself in the mess of tomato sauce. He wouldn't trust his leg with that on a good day.

Kyle scouts over, puts Alex's arm around his shoulders, and hoists him up.

“What about−” Alex gestures to the mess, and his own dropped groceries.

“I'll tell a clerk, it's okay. Let's just get you home, alright?”

“'Kay,” Alex murmurs. He doesn't have the brain space to think about it beyond his embarrassment, anyway.

Kyle lets him lean on him all the way to the checkout counter, and quietly explains what happened to the wide-eyed girl sitting behind it. Alex doesn't listen to her answer, his focus still shot. He stares vaguely at a the packs of gum behind her instead.

“Let's go,” Kyle prompts him to move again.

Alex wants to make it out under his own power, or some variation thereof. He takes his arm back, but he stumbles at the first step, and he has to catch himself roughly on the counter. Rather than make a big deal about it, Kyle simply hooks his arm into his, providing discrete support.

Sometimes Alex wants to hate him for how considerate he is. Right now he doesn't even have it in him to be anything but thankful, though.

The store is just two blocks from Alex's house, so he came here on foot, but there's no way he's making it back. His leg aches something fierce, and his steps are uneven, awkward.

Kyle guides him to his car in the parking lot without a comment, and takes the time to make sure Alex is comfortable in the passenger seat before he drives the thirty seconds to his home. There seems to be no end to Alex's shame tonight, and yet Kyle somehow manages to make it as painless as the situation can be−physically and emotionally. He gets Alex into the most comfortable armchair in his living room, pants and prosthesis off, with minimum fuss and as much privacy as possible.

“Thank you,” Alex murmurs when Kyle finally sits down on the couch across from him.

“I can go, if you tell me you're going to be okay,” Kyle says. “But I can also stay.”

Alex bites his lip. No, he doesn't really want to be left alone with his thoughts. “Not the night,” he says. “But maybe for a minute?” He doesn't like how whiny his voice sounds, but he's exhausted. He curls up in the armchair, propping his right leg on the arm rest and tucking his left foot under him.

“Okay,” Kyle nods, though it's almost midnight. Alex feels bad for asking that of him, but he did offer. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“There isn't much to talk about,” Alex shrugs. “I'm sorry. I was just...tired.”

Kyle raises his eyebrows. “You're allowed not to talk about it, but please don't downplay it, Alex. This wasn't you being tired.”

“No, you're right. This was me freaking out over what tomato sauce to buy. But mostly, it's been a long day. Long week. Long...everything.”

“Your work?” Kyle asks.

“Not really. Not mostly. I've been, uh, taking on side projects, researching Project Shepard and Caulfield, helping you guys. And...my superiors were on base yesterday. My boss. And my boss's boss. And for about half-an-hour, I thought they were here to arrest me.”

“What?”

“It turns out that it was unrelated, but people are asking questions. Not my team, but I'm just a Captain, I still have to answer to people. And recently, I've had to cover up a shit-ton of things. Things that I could be court-martialed for and spend my life in prison several times over. You know this, you did the same.”

“Well, I'm risking my medical license for sure, maybe being sued by the hospital, but probably not jail,” Kyle says. “I didn't...honestly, I don't think any of us realized what you did for us.”

“For them,” Alex corrects him. “You're an outsider to them as much as I am. Tied up by shitty legacies and unwanted feelings for people who don't want us back.”

“You're right,” Kyle sighs. “I told Liz, before the surgery, I told Liz once that was over, I was done. But we all know it's not true.”

Alex gives him a commiserating smile. “In any case, Michael, Max and Isobel risk much worse just by being alive. I'm okay with doing my part. I have to admit that I started seriously questioning that when I learned that Liz decided to go ahead with the heart transplant when she thought you wouldn't be able to keep Max alive, because I had to pull in a lot of favors to get you that theater. That's when people started asking questions.”

“Wait, she didn't tell you beforehand? I thought she told you, or I would have.”

“I don't know if you've noticed, but Liz tends to get tunnel vision,” Alex shrugs. “Rosa told me.”

“Not Michael?”

“Nah, he was wrapped up in his family. We didn't talk.”

“What's going on with you two, anyway?” Kyle asks. “At Caulfield, you were basically flirting the whole way there, and now he's with Maria?”

Alex swallows. “Our...timelines didn't align,” he says. “My family destroyed his. I can't blame him for keeping me at arm's length.”

“That's bullshit, Alex. You're not your family.”

“And yet I brought so much pain into his life,” he sighs.

“So you're just giving up?”

“He's made it clear over and over that I'm not the one he wants. So yeah, I'm giving up.”

Kyle tilts his head. “There's something you're not telling me.”

Fuck. Either Kyle has become even more observant than he was or Alex is still so rattled that he's letting things through. Probably the second option.

Alex ponders it for a moment. He hasn't talked to anyone about that night. He hasn't seen his therapist in months, not since the nightmares and flashbacks Caulfield brought back up abated, and he doesn't exactly have a host of other friends to discuss things with. It's been a weight on his shoulders that doesn't live, that permeates everything. But then...this is Kyle. Is he really someone Alex want to talk about this with?

Actually, yes, he decides. Kyle has something of a unique perspective.

“We had a threesome,” he mutters. It's even more awkward coming out of his mouth than it is when he thinks the word.

“I'm sorry, what did you just say?” Kyle has his mouth hanging open. He's heard perfectly well.

“Michael, Maria and me,” Alex says. “After, uh, Maria and I went to see this boot maker, and he attacked us, stabbed me and went after Maria. She knocked him out and he's in custody,” Alex add hurriedly when he sees Kyle's expression become murderous.

“He stabbed you,” Kyle states.

“Just a little,” Alex shrugs. It's healed just fine, it will probably barely scar. “I'm fine.”

“You got stabbed, and instead of, I don't know, calling me, you had sex with your ex and your best friend. Your female best friend.”

“She initiated it, it's not like we came onto her or anything,” Alex raises his hands.

Kyle blinks. “Yeah, that's not what I'm worried about, Alex.”

“Then what are you worried about?”

Kyle works his jaw several times, trying to find his words. “Let's put it like this. Why are you telling me about it?”

“I...don't know,” Alex shrugs. It weights on his mind, and it needs to get out.

“How did it feel?”

Alex swallows. “Not great. I didn't...I didn't enjoy it. I thought−” he trails off.

“What did you think?” Kyle prompts him.

“We were coming off an adrenaline rush, and being with other people, with them, it felt...safe. I didn't want to leave. When Maria started to−I thought I wanted Michael enough that it would be okay, that I could handle it.”

“'Handle it',” Kyle repeats. “Alex, are you even hearing yourself right now? What would you say if one of your partners said they could 'handle' sex with you?”

“I'd back off right away,” Alex sighs. “But it wasn't like that, we were all consenting.”

“You'd just been attacked. You were injured. I'm assuming you'd been on your leg for a long time. Am I getting the right picture here?”

Alex shrugs. He can't deny it, but it doesn't feel right. Maria and Michael didn't make him have sex with them, he did it of his own free will. Sure, he should have left, but he hasn't been known for making the best decisions for himself, right?

His hands are shaking again.

“I could have left,” he says, his voice trembling. “I didn't want to, but I should have.”

“Okay,” Kyle says, physically backing off. “Don't spiral out again, it's okay.”

“I tried to go on a date, today,” Alex says after a few deep breaths.

“What happened?”

“Nothing. The guy is great. I just...he tried to kiss me, and I couldn't.”

Kyle frowns. “Why−oh, in public?”

“Yeah.”

“Does he know about your father?”

“No,” Alex shrugs. “Does it matter? We all have our bad coming out stories.”

“Your father is a little more than that, Alex,” Kyle raises an eyebrow, like Alex doesn't know that.

“It doesn't change anything. He's not ready to date someone who's not out and proud.”

“Except you are, Alex. You are out and proud. And honestly, with what you've been through, it's amazing how open you are. So maybe you don't wear glitter or dye your hair blue−”

Alex snickers.

“What?”

“Forrest has blue hair,” he says.

“The guy?”

“Yes.”

“Oh. Well, my point stands. You're not in the closet, you just have baggage. Heavy baggage, maybe, but it's not the same.”

Alex tilts his head. Kyle is not wrong, even if he hadn't thought of it that way.

“You think I'd look good in glitter?” he asks, because he needs to stop getting in too deep with his emotions.

“Alex, you'd look good in sack. Glitter, rainbows, crazy hair colors? You'd definitely pull them off. Green would look good on you. Or purple.”

“I think I'll stick to black, thank you,” Alex laughs. “But maybe I'll think of getting my ears pierced again. What about you?”

“What about me?”

“You suddenly seem to be awfully interested in queer fashion.”

Kyle actually blushes. “Um, I...I might have taken to hanging out at Planet 7,” he mumbles.

“You?” Alex asks in shock.

“I wanted to get away from Liz. And anything alien. Actually aliens, I mean. Not that it worked.”

Alex frowns. “Michael was there?”

“No,” Kyle shakes his head. “Not him. Fuck, I shouldn't have told you that.”

It takes Alex a few moments to catch up. “It can't be Max, so...Isobel? Really?”

“I didn't mean to...out her or anything.”

“It's okay, I'm not going to go shout it from the rooftops,” Alex says, because Kyle really looks worried. “Though you should definitely be careful who you tell.”

“I will.”

“What about you?” Alex asks.

“What?”

“Are you trying to tell me you're not as straight as you thought?”

Kyle hides his face in his hands. “I don't know, maybe? I don't...I'm really not sure. I never thought about men that way, but when I see the couples there, or the people who hook up...I don't know.”

“It's okay,” Alex smiles. “It's okay not to know. You don't need to have a word that fits right away.”

“Thanks,” Kyle nods.

“Anytime.”

“I was so horrible to you in high school, this would be a perfect opportunity for payback. Just goes to show what a good man you are.”

All the levity that this conversation has brought Alex goes right down the gutter, leaving him ice cold. “I'm not a good man,” he says through gritted teeth.

“You are. You're a good friend, Alex. A good person. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.”

Alex sighs and lets it go. It's not a conversation for one in the morning. “You should go home,” he says.

“Are you sure you'll be okay?”

Alex stands up slowly, wishing he had his second crutch for the trip over to his bedroom. “Look, I'll call my therapist, okay? I promise.”

“You do that,” Kyle says, standing up as well. Then, before Alex can completely process it, he opens his arms and closes them around him, careful not to make him lose his balance. Alex stiffens, unused to the contact, but it feels good. Safe. He relaxes slowly, bit by bit, and awkwardly pats Kyle's back with his free hand. “We'll grab a beer sometime this week, okay?”

“Sure,” Alex nods in Kyle's shoulder. “Would be nice.”

“I'll text you tomorrow.”

Kyle lets him go and fishes out his keys from his pocket, turning to leave.

“Hey, Kyle?” Alex calls after him quietly.

“Yes?”

“Thank you for tonight.”

“You're very welcome,” Kyle smiles sweetly.

Despite his exhaustion, Alex doesn't fall asleep for hours, and when it does, it's to restless slumber, full of vague nightmares. He drags himself out of bed at nine, two hours past his usual wake-up time, and spends the morning trying to force his aching body into submission with a mix of PT exercises and yoga, that turns too easily into a punishment. A hundred push-ups, for being so weak. The voice in his head is his father's.

As he stares at his counter come eleven, an hour before Maria is supposed to be there, he remembers something. He still doesn't have tomato sauce. Or pasta, for that matter, since he never got to pay for his groceries last night.

“Fuck this,” he murmurs to himself, almost smirking at the joke that is his life. There is nothing he wants less than to spend the day with Maria. He doesn't have anything to cook her, and the Crashdown is closed on Sundays.

No. He's not going to do this.

He eyes his phone, thinking of coming up with some bullshit excuse to Maria. He can think of a dozen that would work well enough off the top of his head, though she's sure to give him hell for it later. At the thought of even seeing her later, Alex grimaces.

No. He sticks his phone in his back pocket and grabs his wallet, his keys and his crutch.

Right before he leaves, on a whim, he grabs a pen and a pad of sticky notes and writes SORRY. HAD SOMETHING TO DO. in capital letters. He sticks the note on his front door and sets the alarm.

Maybe this is his breaking point.

Forrest looks truly surprised when Alex shows up on his doorstep. He had to look up the actual address, since Forrest doesn't actually live in the barn where they met, and the Longs have several properties in the same area. He wouldn't want to knock on an random door and run into Wyatt.

“Hi,” Alex says.

“Is that voice in your head already gone?” Forrest asks.

“Not exactly. I just...thought you should hold all the cards.”

Forrest stares at him for a moment, thinking. “Alright,” he says. “Come in, then.”

The house is really more of a cabin, small and wooden all around. The inside is very different from Jim Valenti's cabin, though, and it screams Forrest. It seems this man really is what he shows to the outside, an open book.

The opposite of Alex, in a way.

“Sit down,” Forrest says. “I was just making coffee, you want some?”

“Sure. Black, please.”

Alex sits down on a comfortable couch covered with a patterned comforter while Forrest pours them both mugs in the tiny kitchen area.

“So, what did you want to say?”

Alex takes a deep inspiration. Despite his coming here being a heat of the moment thing, he's tried to practice his words in his car. He's not good with words, but it all comes down to what Kyle said last night.

“You asked me about my PTSD triggers, yesterday,” he says.

“Yes,” Forrest agrees carefully.

“You know, the funny thing is that no one's ever asked me that before. Beside my therapist, I mean. Most of my friends don't know I have PTSD, and the one who does usually doesn't need to ask.”

“Alien guy?” Forrest asks curiously.

“No. My relationship with Michael is more complicated. He has his own issues.”

“Okay. So you want to tell me about your triggers?”

“How they relate to what we talked about,” Alex says. “Being closeted. It's not that I don't want to come out. Sure, I wasn't out in the Air Force during DADT and that was hell, but here...I haven't been in the closet in this town since early high school. Everyone who knows me here knows I'm gay, and I'm fine with that.”

“Then what is it?” Forrest asks.

Alex bites his lip, then takes the plunge. “The last time I really pissed off a homophobe, it didn't end well for the guy I was with.”

“What do you mean? Did you get assaulted?”

“Yeah, you could say that. He went at my...boyfriend's hand with a hammer.”

Forrest covers his mouth with his hand in shock.

“I was seventeen,” Alex continues. “It was my father.”

“Fuck, Alex, I−”

Alex waves it off. “Don't apologize. I just...I wanted you to know. I'm not in the closet. But ever since that day, I haven't been able to be with someone and feel completely safe.”

“Of course,” Forrest murmurs. “Was your father generally abusive? Or did he snap?”

“He didn't start hitting me until he figured out I was gay, but he basically raised us−me and my brothers−as if we were in basic training,” Alex says. “After the...accident, he made me enlist, and I didn't come back to Roswell until a few months ago.”

“That's, wow, that's a lot. I thought my family was bad.”

“There's no comparison to make,” Alex shrugs. “You're brave enough to be proud of who you are in spite of them. I...I'm trying to get there. But it's hard.”

“I get that,” Forrest nods. “I understand it better now. Something didn't quite make sense about you.”

Alex thinks of Michael, of aliens and the secret lab and his classified work. He thinks of his father in the hospital, and being unable to just let him fall. He thinks of last night in the supermarket. “I don't make a lot of sense,” he says. “Which is why I completely get that you don't want to try something with me. I just wanted you to know.”

Forrest pauses and looks him up and down. “You know, maybe...I've put my standards very high, because I've been burned too many times, but so far you met everyone of them easily, except for this one. Maybe it's unrealistic. Maybe I shouldn't let you go, just because you're not quite ready to kiss me in public.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I like you Alex. I really like you, and I'm guessing the fact that you came all the way out here means you feel the same. So maybe those standards were just me closing myself off from opportunities. Maybe I should give this a chance.”

Alex smiles.

#roswell new mexico #alex manes #kyle valenti #forest long #forlex #2x08 coda #anti malexa #trying to tag appropriately #tell me if i miss something #rnm s2 #rnm fanfiction #mine #echo's fanfiction

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thoughtfullyyoungduck · 4 years

Text

Lucky charm

A/N: This was requested by anonymous. Thank you so much for requesting! I hope you enjoyed! let me know what you think!

Summary: Hi I was wondering if you could do a reddie x reader, where they’re doing the ritual of Chud and the reader confesses to always loving them but never admitting it till now and they all make it out alive and live happy lives.

‘Your artificets’, Mike proclaims, ‘place them in the fire. The past must burn with the present.’

At his words, everyone goes to reach for their token, ready to burn them for the ritual. You hesitate, and decide to wait before bringing it out of your pocket.

You’re scared of the consequences. Despite only remembering the losers for a day, you couldn’t imagine having to live without them ever again. Bev pulled up the postcard where the poem was written on. The same poem that you and Bev had spent hours analyzing when you were kids. The times spend questioning who the boy could be that wrote it were some of the best times you had ever had in your life.

Back then Bev had hoped it was Bill, but looking at the way Ben stared at her and the card, suddenly the answer was pretty clear. You wondered if Bev had noticed, she never did when you were kids, and she didn’t seem to notice it now. She was the only one who knew the truth about you. The only one who knew that you had been in love with both Richie and Eddie.

It wasn’t really that you didn’t trust the other losers, minus of course Richie and Eddie, but you were afraid of what they might think of you. To be in love with one of them is already bad enough, let alone being in love with both of them. Bill is the first one to speak. He hold up a paper boat, with the initials SS Georgie on it.

‘This is the boat that I built, with G-‘, he paused, Georgie.’ He reaches forward and drops it into the fire. Nobody speaks for a couple of seconds, just letting it sink in that they were about to say goodbye to gimmicks of their past. Eddie is next. He’s holding his inhaler, toying it around in his hand. You don’t dare to make eye contact with him, the shame is already burning too deep for that. ‘It’s my inhaler’, he says. His eyebrows raise up while looking around the group. He and Richie share eye contact and your heart clenches. Then he reaches the inhaler to his mount to take one last puff.

‘Come on, dude’, Richie inquires, causing you to let out a wet laugh. Their dynamic hadn’t changed at all. Eddie then tosses his inhaler in the fire, looking at you as he does so.

‘Something that I wish I held on to.’ Bev stares at the postcard as she speaks, seemingly saying goodbye to it. Ben stares at her, captivated. The same way he has always looked at her, you wished someone would look at you like that.

‘This is a page from my yearbook. That only one person signed. I probably should have forgotten it, but I couldn’t because I kept it in my wallet.’ Ben takes a deep breath, ‘for 27 years.’ Beverly looks shocked, amazed at the fact that Ben still had that. It takes her a few seconds to realize that she was the one that Ben was talking about, but once she does, an emotion appears in her eyes. One that you had never seen in her before. You hoped they would man up soon, and confess to each other how they felt. That is, if they made it out of here alive. You didn’t want to think about that, but it was a real possibility.

Richie is quick to utter; ‘this is a token from the Capitol Theater,’ literally tossing the token in the fire.

‘You brought an actual token?’ Eddie mussed.

‘Yeah man’, Richie answers. You notice for the first time that Richie’s glasses are broken. You wonder if that isn’t annoying him. It’s such a unimportant thought that it almost makes you laugh. You are certain that Richie had had worse things happen to them but still.

‘Do you have any idea how long that’s gonna take to burn?’ Eddie complains crossing his arms on his chest.

‘Eddie’, you groan, though everyone can clearly hear the laugh in your voice.

‘That’s what we were supposed to do’, he adds exaggerated.

Richie grins at you. ‘Yeah but so is your inhaler, dude.’

‘Can you please stop calling him dude, dude.’ You beg rolling your eyes at the two man.

‘Guys, come on,’ Ben backs you up. You shoot him a thankful smile, missing the way throws him a heated stare.

‘All the toxic fumes and the plastic and shit so.’ Richie adds, not one to back down. Mike ignores them. He taps you with his elbow encouraging you to throw your artifact in. You falter though, and Mike must still know you well enough, because he relents after seeing your face. Instead he shows his tokes first, a rock from the rock right after which he joined the losers club all those years ago.

He drops the rock into the fire, without pause, and suddenly, you’re the only one left to show your artifact. Eddie taps him on the shoulder, ‘that’s not gonna burn either.’

Shakenly, you take the necklace out of your pocket. You refuse adamantly too look at anyone, staring ahead to a spot on the floor. You shake your head, trying to think of anything to say. You come up empty handed. You know what you would like to say, but you’re afraid of saying it, and you’re afraid of how the others might respond. You wonder if Eddie and Richie recognize it.

There’s a part of you that hopes they do, and a part of you that hopes they don’t. ‘This is the Necklace-‘, you pause, clearing your throat before continuing. ‘-this is the necklace that my two best friends gave to me. They spend a really long time making it, and they gave it to me when I was really sad.’

Technically that was lie, Mike was your best friend back you were still kids, but you couldn’t tell Eddie and Richie that you had been in love with them at that age, that was way too embarrassing. Your laugh sounds empty, without any joy.

You were happy to have the memory back of the day you got it, you were glad to have the necklace back. It was given to you when you were twelve, after a boy had stood you up for the school dance. It had seemed so important back then.

It was the first heartbreak experience you had ever had, and it seemed like the world was going to collapse. Richie and Eddie had followed you after seeing you upset, all the way up to the quarry, and Eddie had even joined you and Richie sitting down on the Forrest ground, despite how he must have been dying inside of doing so.

Richie and Eddie had gone to the prom with each other, mostly because no one wanted to be their date, but it still warmed your heart that they chose to come after you. Richie had offered you the necklace, apparently he and Eddie had been working on it for two months. It had a few different blue and green stones. It was tied together by a wooden string. It looked like it would fall apart at the seams, though as you kept it for many years, it turned out that it was more than sturdy enough.

Still, as soon as you got it, it became your favorite thing you had ever received. You wore it everyday and to every occasion. It was like your lucky charm.

You liked to believe that it was the necklace that kept you safe during pennywise, but maybe that was superstition. Either way, whenever you had a bad moment you would clench the stones in your hand, and it helped to settle you down.

When you remembered the necklace, you felt awful, put it also made some things make sense. Like when you first got to college, and you reached for your neck, as if you were looking for something, but you couldn’t find anything. Now that you knew it existed you had trouble letting it go.

‘And it’s really important to me because I’m in love with them.’ Your eyes fill with tears instantly, and your shaking gets even worse. You hear Eddie gasp, so you know he must have figured out what you were talking about.

‘Yeah, I’m in love with two people like some weirdo. I’m so sorry guys. It’s just that I can’t keep it to myself anymore. In my whole life I’ve never had anyone know me completely. I understand that I might have just ruined everything, but I don’t want to keep any part of me hidden anymore. I’m tired of hiding my feelings.’

You’re addressing Eddie and Richie, but it’s Bill that responds. He places his hand on your back, in an effort to comfort you.

‘That’s okay, Y/N, that doesn’t change a-a-anything,’ Bill consoled.

‘Yeah’, sniffing you shoot him a small smile. You refuse to look at neither Richie nor Eddie.

‘Let’s talk about this after we make it out of here alive okay?’

You glance up when you see shuffling from the corner of your eye. It’s Eddie, his face a bright red. It makes the white of his bandages stand out even more. ‘That also isn’t going to burn’, Richie mumbles, just as shocked as Eddie. Richie clears his throat opening his mouth, probably to say something stupid, but you interject.

‘Hey what about Stan’s artifact? We should probably throw that in there too.’

Eddie is still stuck, his eyes darting between Richie and you, before getting an elbow to the ribs from Ben and reaching for the shower cap in his back pocket.

‘Right’, he laughs nervously before throwing the cap into the still burning fire.

Mike reaches his hand out to you, and you grasp it, turning around to do that same with Bill. It reminds you of the time after killing pennywise, 27 years ago. Except Stan was still there, and you hadn’t ruined your friendship with Richie and Eddie. However you couldn’t focus on that now, right now you needed to make sure that you killed IT for real.

‘The ritual of Chud. It’s a battle of wills. The first step was our reunion. The second was the gathering of our tokens. This is the final step.’ Mike explains. He looks determined, and you’re glad at least one person was confident that you were going to win this.

Eddie and Richie are holding hands, for the circle, but they’re still holding hands. You wished you knew what they were thinking, because it would help to calm your franticly beating heart down. You just wanted to know if they hated you. You could live with them not returning your feelings, but you couldn’t live with them not even wanting to be your friends anymore.

They weren’t looking at each other either, and it would rip you heart to shreds if their relationship was ruined by your confession. The fire suddenly blows out on its own. A quite ‘what the fuck’, falls from you lips squeezing Bill’s and Mike’s hand tighter.

Out of nowhere a light suddenly appears above you and the losers, and your gaze is instantly pulled towards it. It feels like you can’t look away.

Next to you, you hear Bill utter his own ‘what the fuck’, but you can’t pull your gaze away.

‘Don’t look at it’. Mike screams, having issues looking away aswell. ‘Don’t look at it’, he repeats.

‘Are those the deadlights?’ Eddie asks fearfully, but he follows Mike’s order without waiting for the answer.

You keep staring, mesmerized by the blinding lights. You know you have to stop gazing at them, but you’re having difficulty listening to reason. It’s Richie’s frightful scream of your names that snaps you out if it. The sound of his voice is so chilling, it causes you focus on him, suppressing the shiver that wants to roll through your body.

‘Turn light into dark. Turn light into dark. Say it’, Mike screams loudly. Frowning in confusion, you begin to repeat the words. It doesn’t seem to do anything, but considering everyone is following Mike’s lead, you continue to bellow the words anyway.

The lights come closer and closer, and suddenly it appears that they’re gone. The dark returning. Mike lets go of your hand, and reflectively you reach for him, but he’s already trying to push the lid back on the artifact.

‘Holy shit did it work’? You question, hope shining through in your voice. Mike laughs, a little manic, but he stops abruptly when a red balloon tries to push the lid off. ‘Is that supposed to be happening’? Bev squawks.

‘Mike is this supposed to be happening’?

It clearly, by the look of panic on Mike’s face, is not supposed to be happening, and in an effort to help him, you too reach forward to try and keep the lid in place. The damage is already done though, and the balloon continues to inflate, until you have to take cover before it explodes completely.

The blast slams you against a sharp piece of rock, hurting your shoulder in the process. Your ears are ringing, and for a second all you can focus on is the feeling of blood, dripping from you shoulder down your arm. Then Eddie appears in you sight.

He crouches down beside you, placing you in a sitting position. His eyes widen when they the blood, and he’s pushing your jacket off before you can even fully process that he’s here. ‘Hey Y/N, are you okay’? He ask franticly, but it sounds like you’re listening to him underwater. After shaking your head a few times, your hearing clears out, and you can hear Richie calling yours and Eddie’s name.

He too, worries about the wound on your shoulder, but you assure them both that it’s not that serious. You’ve had much worse. You realize with a startle that they’re both here and worried about you, so they must at the very least not hate you. The thought makes you smile.

‘What are you laughing at weirdo?’ Richie teases, and Eddie laughs. Before anything more can be said, Pennywise appears from behind the spikes where you had just stood a minute ago.

He startles you, and you jump up with a small scream. Mike’s ritual didn’t work, and you didn’t know what other options there were to beat this demon clown.

‘Oh did it work Mikey, did it work?’ IT taunts, and a guilty look takes over Mike’s face.

‘Tell them why your silly ritual didn’t work.’

‘M-m-mikey?’ Bill asks, the whole group peering at Mike. Promptly you understand what’s happening.

‘It wasn’t real was it Mike?’

‘What the fuck do you mean, Y/N? What isn’t real? Somebody answer me’, Eddie demands.

Mike nods solemnly. ‘I’m sorry guys. But, but they didn’t believe.’ He stammered. ‘They didn’t believe they could kill IT. That’s why it didn’t work back then, that’s why it was supposed to work now.’

‘Are you fucking kidding me Mike?’

The deadlight make a sudden reappearance, and in shock you grasp Eddie’s sweater, because he was the closest to you.

‘For 27 years, I dreamt of you, I craved you, oh I missed you’, IT chuckles darkly. ‘Time to float’; his hand turns into a sharp claw, going after the entire losers club.

‘Fuck’, you manage to say, right before you’re dragged along by your friends, running as fast as you can. You have no time to think about it rationally, all you think about is running and surviving.

Richie, Eddie and you seek coverage behind a giant rock, watching as the rest of the losers also find a hiding spot. IT goes after Bill first, but he must have made an escape as IT’s eyes turn to you.

‘Do you think he can see us’? Richie asks, making you laugh for a second before IT slams forward, causing the three of you to scream and continue running.

You bolt further into the cave, feeling IT’s eyes still on you. When you’ve run far enough to have a small semblance of safety, you pause, trying to catch your breath. You’re worried about your friends, and hope that they’re somewhere where IT couldn’t catch you.

You’re startled, once your brain process the fact that you are now alone with both Richie and Eddie after just confessing your love for them. They’re already looking at you, most likely waiting for you to say something, anything, but you can’t think of a thing. Your mind comes up blank, and you panic. You’re not ready for whatever they’re about to say.

‘oh no’, you mutter, before turning around and going back the way you come. Richie’s arms circle around your middle before you have even moved so much as a step, pulling you against his chest.

‘Where are you going, back to IT to get killed’? He ask which yeah, he has a good point. He puts you down, only when you promise to stay put.

Eddie stands behind you, pulling you into a hug as soon as you stand on the ground again. All three of your breathing is still heavy, but you do your best to calm down as soon as possible. It’s only when Eddie lets you go that you notice the three doors. On each door respectively is written; not scary, scary, very scary.

You’re not particularly interested in opening any one of those. Eddie and Richie day something, but you don’t listen to them as you step forward toward the door scary. ‘No no wait’, Richie says, ‘he’s fucking with us. He did this to me before.’ He walks towards the very scary door, and you’re terrified that he’s wrong. You hesitate alongside Eddie. ‘Trust me’, Richie begs, and Eddie and you look at each other, shrugging before coming closer to Richie.

He opens the door slowly, trying to gauge what’s behind it. It’s a dark closet, pitch black so you can’t see anything in it. All three of you are quite, until a fourth voice speaks up. ‘Where’s my shoe?’

You could swear you had heard that before somewhere, but before you can place it, Richie turns the lights on, and you hear footsteps coming your way. the legs and only the legs of someone come running towards the door. A woman’s voice is laughing. Richie, Eddie and you screeched, and Richie doesn’t hesitate one second before slamming the door shut before the legs can reach you.

You, not trusting Richie anymore, open the door in the middle, labeled Scary. You pull the door open without waiting for Richie and Eddie, not wanting them to be in danger. Behind this door, is your old bedroom. You frown, you can’t remember something happening to you in your room. You hear weeping sounds, and deciding to investigate, you walk further into the door.

‘Hey, Y/N, are you insane get back here’, Eddie whisper shouts. When you don’t respond both Eddie and Richie follow you into the room. The window was open, and despite being in a sewer, you could swear you smelled the lavender of your neighbor’s garden flowing in. You turn towards the bed, Richie and Eddie following your lead. It’s you that’s crying. Your 15 your old self, writing something down in your diary, you have no idea where that thing was.

You’re talking to yourself, and even though you know you never did that, out of fear your parents would hear, you still listened intrigued. You know that it’s one of Pennywise’s tricks, but you can’t figure out what he’s playing at. ‘Dear diary, today I got rejected by the two boys that mean the most to me’, you hear the fake-you say. You turn red, hoping to god Richie and Eddie couldn’t see it.

‘I mean why would they when they have each other? They’ll never fucking love you Y/N’, your fake-voice gets increasingly louder, until it’s so high pitched it hurts your eyes. Fake-you lifts her head, and you gag when you see what she looks like. Your eyes have fallen all the way into your sockets, it seems like you don’t have them at all. There’s blood instead of water on your cheeks, And there’s scratches all over your face out of which a black puss is streaming out. It’s a disgusting sight.

The fake-you cackles loudly, her arms coming up and aiming for you, but Eddie and Richie both take a hand and run out of the room. As soon as your back in the cave, you fall down on your knees, your breath heaving. Richie and Eddie sit in front you, doing their best to calm you down, but it’s not really helpful considering they’re not calm either. ‘Hey Y/N, look at me, I need to tell you something’, Eddie requests, but your too busy focusing on your breathing to comply.

‘Hey Y/N come, on. You’re okay’, Richie tries, but you still feel like there’s no air getting sucked into your lungs, so you ignore him for the time being to.

‘Fuck it’, Eddie proclaims, before tumbling forward, catching your lips with his. You choke, and the kiss is quite honestly terrible. When Eddie pulls back, you follow his lips, this time making it a proper kiss. Your lips slot together, eagerly reciprocating the emotion you feel behind it. When Eddie and you break apart this time, he turns around and kisses Richie.

The sight of them makes your heart grow twice it’s normal size. You’re breathless for a whole different reason now. When Eddie and Richie sink back, Your hand slots behind Richie’s head, bringing his face towards yours. The kiss you share it sweet and amazing. You never thought you would ever be able to kiss one of them, let alone both of them, yet here you were. The happiness you feel almost makes you cry.

‘Listen to me, I love you, the both of you. I can’t imagine my life without either of you. So let’s get out of here, kill this fucking clown and then we can figure this all out later. You just both need to know I love you.’ Richie says, looking mortified at the fact all those words just came out of his mount. ‘Almost as much as I love Eddie’s mom.’

Eddie rolls his eyes dramatically, and you give Richie a light shove, but the truth is that you are more determined than ever to kill IT, and to hopefully start a knee life with the guys that you have loved since you were thirteen. You didn’t need your lucky necklace as long as you had them by your side.

Standing up you reach for Eddie and Richie’s hands, and together you get ready to defeat it. Despite all the determination, defeating Pennywise is not easy.

You awake with a startle, reaching out for the light you know is somewhere on your bedside table. You can’t find it, but you do find a mop a dark hair, knitted with curls. You pull your hand back, startled, but accidentally pull at the hair aswell.

The person who the mop of hair belongs to groans, turning to face you. Richie’s face, what you can make of it in the dark, looks heavy with sleep, still, but seeing you panicked turns a switch, and he’s awake in seconds. On your other side, another person stirs, but doesn’t wake up. When you turn you see it’s Eddie. A breath of relief makes a way out of your lungs. The events after your first kiss were traumatizing.

For Richie because he got caught in the dead lights, for Eddie because he nearly got stabbed, and for you for seeing both of them get hurt so badly. Luckily, you all made it out alive, but it was a close call. You often had nightmares, but you tried your best not to let that deter you. You were happy in life, living with Richie and Eddie. Eddie got a divorce and moved to L.A, with you and Richie. After realizing how close you and Richie lived from each other, you too decided to pack up and move in.

Life was going great, and you weren’t going to let a silly little nightmare destroy any more of the peace. ‘You okay’? Richie asks, plucking a piece of your hair behind you ear. You nod without speaking, shuffling down to claim your place between the two boys again. Eddie, I’m his sleep, throws an arm around bit you and Richie.

You giggle seeing the drool that slipping out from between his lips. Richie snorts when he follows your gaze, stroking his hand affectionately through Eddie’s hair. He presses a kiss to your neck and tangles your legs together. When you fall back asleep, there are no more nightmares, and when you wake up, you thank your lucky stars that you got to have this.

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stayextrafrosty · 3 years

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I am Your Future, I am Your Past: Chapter 9

A Roswell New Mexico Soulmate AU

Warnings: General violence and Alex being a badass. Also feels

A/N: Yea so it's been like two months and I'm so sorry about that. Everything just got in the way. I'm still super busy but I had some time to finish this up when I was on a plane yesterday. You've been on that cliffhanger for so long... forgive me. I really hope you enjoy this!

Read on AO3 // Chapter 1

What exactly was he doing? Michael had no idea. But Alex was there. He had come to him. He came to him when he thought he was in danger. He was worried. Everything in his body screamed to close the distance between them. Pull him into the trailer and never let him leave again.

Take all their broken pieces and put them back together as one.

The fire flickered in the reflection in his eyes. They darted back and forth over his face, occasionally lingering. Michael pressed his forehead against his, waiting for rejection. Or acceptance.

Alex’s breathing was erratic, like he didn’t know what was coming next. Michael felt him move, his hands holding onto his arms. He felt himself smile, inching closer to him.

“I kissed Forrest,” he rushed out.

Michael froze. The fire snapped. Or maybe that was his heart. He had pushed him too far, and now he was with someone else. There was no one else to blame but himself.

He pulled himself away from him slowly, letting his hands fall to his sides. He watched Alex, wide eyed and lost. His mouth opened but nothing came out. Michael turned away from him. The longer he watched him, the closer he felt to crying.

“I just… You pushed me away,” he said quietly.

He may as well have dug a knife into his chest. Reminder after reminder that anything Alex had done to move on from him was his fault. He had fought so hard to push him away. Now he has to fight twice as hard to get him back.

“You’re right. It’s not my place to expect anything from you,” he said stiffly, clenching his fists. He felt Alex’s fingers wrap around his arm.

“You just broke up with Maria. She didn’t tell me what happened. And I have a good thing going with Forrest. We’re not right, Guerin.” Michael laughed humorlessly and turned his head back toward him.

“We’re right. Just not right now.” He tugged his arm free from Alex’s hold gently. He took a few steps toward his trailer before stopping. “Alex?” he paused, “Call me Michael. I’m done with the walls.” He headed towards the trailer without another word.

He made it to the door, pulling it open slightly before it was slammed in his face. He spun to face Alex, who was glaring at him, though not convincingly. Michael searched his face for other emotions but he only looked conflicted.

“We aren’t good for each other… Michael.”

Alex grabbed his face, crushing his mouth to his. Michael stumbled back against the side of the trailer; the metal was still warm from the day in the sun. He grabbed at his waist, trying to pull him closer. Alex slipped one of his legs between Michael’s. He groaned and shoved his hands under the t-shirt.

Alex let his hands wander, tangling in his hair. Michael ran the tip of his tongue over his lip, wanting to taste him. Needing to taste him.

Their tongues met for the shortest moment and they both sighed in response. Alex was just as sweet as he used to be. A hint of alcohol tried and failed to cover the taste of him. Michael could never place it. But it was his favorite taste.

Michael squeezed his waist, making him roll his hips, forcing him completely back against the trailer. He moaned softly, giving Alex an opening he took full advantage off. He swept his tongue over his, teasing.

He pulled back slightly, breathing hard. He chased, pressing a few pecks to his lips. He returned each one with a chase of his own.

“You still smell like rain,” he mumbled against his lips. Michael chuckled and kissed him again. He pushed back against him and flipped them so Alex was the one against the trailer. He pressed his forehead against his, then glanced at the door.

I would be so easy to pull him inside. Trap him in this slice of happiness. Putting off the heartbreak until tomorrow morning.

“Michael,” he pleaded. Their hips pressed together and he could feel the growing need in his jeans. His own probably wasn’t much better.

The last time he heard that voice from Alex, he had run away. Shut him down. He didn’t want to do it again. But…

“Alex… I can’t do it like this,” he said, voice low with need. He pulled away, watching his eyebrows draw together in confusion. “Don’t get me wrong, I want you. I want you so much it’s killing me.” Alex looked away.

“Then why are you stopping,” he asked quietly? He thought for a moment.

When this ended, Alex was going to leave. He was going to try to move on with someone else. Michael had done this move what felt like a thousand times. It’s his ‘one last time.’ He was giving himself one last time to get him out of his system.

“Because I want all of you. I will not give you the satisfaction of walking away. I want you to come back to me. Because when you do, it’ll finally be right.”

Alex’s eyes snapped toward him but they didn’t linger for very long. He could feel his confusion. His desire. But also fear. He was still turned away from him, eyes focusing on something intently. He knew that face. He was trying not to cry.

Michael leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to the spot just below his ear. Alex sucked in a breath. He lingered for a moment but then released him completely.

Walking away from him- again- felt like he was ripping his heart out. Alex would feel that. But as the door closed between them, he couldn’t help but pray he didn’t just make a huge mistake.

Michael didn’t sleep. At least not well. Alex had left shortly after he went inside. He texted him, asking if he made it home. He got a clipped, ‘yes’ in response. He tried to ignore all the emotions that were circling in his head, unable pick out which ones belonged to Alex.

He stared at the ceiling of his trailer, noticing the sun starting to peak through the blinds. Tessa had been in awe of the sun yesterday. He didn’t really know what to make of her. She acted younger than them at times but if what she said was true, she’s thousands of years old.

He grabbed his phone off the counter to check the time. Groaning at the numbers he saw. A little past six. What time was she planning to show up again? Did she even say? Were he and Alex just supposed to hang out until she decided to make herself known?

Michael let his eyes drift closed, hoping for some kind of rest.

Banging on his door yanked him from a dream he was quickly forgetting. It felt like he had blinked. Like he hadn’t slept at all. He stumbled out of bed, not bothering with a shirt and unlocked the door.

“The attackers are getting out on bail,” was the first thing out of Max’s mouth when the door swung open. Michael blinked, blinded by the bright desert sand.

“What time is it,” he grumbled?

“Almost noon.”

“Right. Got any good news for me this early in the day?”

He pushed past Max, running a hand over his face. What was he supposed to do? It’s not like he could just kidnap Alex to make sure he stays safe. Even if that was exactly what he wanted to do. Max shook his head.

“Isabel told me what happened yesterday. Told me that some girl showed up offering all the answers to our problems.”

“The key word there is ‘offering.’ I don’t know if we can trust her. She’s an angel of death.” She used the word Nephilim but what’s the difference?

“And what does Alex think?” Michael dug his nails into his palms. He hadn’t exactly asked. Other conversations had happened first. Max let out a small laugh, taking his silence as an answer. “Communication is key, Michael.”

“Oh please, like you and Liz talk about everything all the time.” He ignored the jab and continued lecturing. Michael turned away to move the chairs from last night.

“The point is you can’t just cut him out of decisions. He knows her, right? I guarantee he wants to trust her. What about Forrest? He’s been asking questions.” Michael’s eye twitched at the name. Alex wasn’t going to talk about Forrest with him. Not at any length.

“Then tell him to mind his own. Alex and I don’t talk about him,” he said, trying to keep the bite out of his voice. He heard Max scoff.

“Don’t let your jealousy get in the way of making rational decisions.” He barked out a laugh. This was rich coming from him.

“How long did you pine after Liz when she was with Valenti? I seem to recall more than one fist fight. And you’re lecturing me about being rational?” He turned back toward him; a disbelieving smile worked its way onto his face. Max pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Damnit I’m trying to help you, Michael! I’m just saying to watch your back and Alex’s. Don’t go running off to do something stupid,” Max huffed and stormed back to his car. Michael watched as he left.

He ran a hand over his face. It was way too early for him to be considering going to the bar but here he was.

It wasn’t an option. He would bet any amount of money that it was Jesse Manes that bailed them out. He had half a mind to just go over there and kill him right now. But that was a right reserved for Alex. He had decided that a long time ago.

Michael grumbled to himself. Maybe he was jealous. But what did it matter? Forrest and Alex just met and he was already prying into his life? Everyone at the bar said he was a good guy but he kept secrets. Not that Michael didn’t but it was just too convenient.

He moved back to the trailer, resting the chairs he was holding against the metal. He heard his phone buzz on the counter as he stepped back inside. Three missed calls from Alex. No voicemails.

He went to call him back but the phone started buzzing again, Alex’s name filling the screen. He couldn’t stop the grin that settled on his face.

“I would have called back if you gave me a chance,” he said as he answered.

“Cut the crap. Where’s Alex?” Michael didn’t register the question at first. Was that Forrest? Why did he have Alex’s phone?

“What are you talking about?”

“Alex. Where. Is. He?” Michael couldn’t respond. Alex had texted him last night. Right? He lifted a hand to his chest. He hadn’t felt anything that would say he’s in danger.

“Why would I know that?” His voice was calm but his mind was racing. He grabbed a shirt and jeans from the floor that might have been clean.

“There’s blood and you’re the last person he messaged.” His eyebrows drew together. If Alex were hurt, he’d know it. Either someone else was hurt or this was a setup for someone who didn’t know about the curse.

“Look. I’ll find him,” he said, pulling the shirt over his head. “Stay at his house in case he comes back.”

“No way. I’m getting the military involved. They have to find one of their own and probably have a better chance than you do.” Michael had to stop himself from laughing.

“You don’t know anything about it. If you call the military, we’ll never see him again.” His father was certainly looking for him. If they hadn’t already gotten to him.

Forrest laughed on the other end of the phone. He could hear papers rustling, as though he was looking for something. Michael grabbed his keys and rushed out of the trailer toward his truck.

“Look. I care about him. If you don’t let me go with you when you look then I will get the military involved.” He jerked the door open, gipping his phone. What choice did he have? He had his suspicions but nothing could be proved.

“Fine. I’ll meet you there.”

Alex groaned. He couldn’t remember what happened after he had responded to Michael. He had thought about calling Forrest but decided against it in favor of being alone with his thoughts about the cowboy. Besides, he was never really one to make a booty call.

He pried his eyes open. He wasn’t uncomfortable, just the opposite. There was no pressure on his leg. Someone had gone through the effort of removing his prosthetic and placing him in bed. But where was this?

He shot up from the mattress and regretted it instantly. The room spun.

“What the hell,” he muttered as he grabbed his head. He felt for bumps on his head and looked over his body. Then he realized it would be pointless. Any injury would have transferred to Michael.

The room slowly stopped making him nauseous. There were no windows. Just a bed that was far too nice for someone who was kidnapped. Was that even what this was. Not even the military treated hostages this well.

He swung his leg over the side of the bed and pushed himself up slowly. His balance was alright but he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t a pain in the ass to hop around on one leg. He didn’t expect the door would be open. But he tried anyway.

He jiggled the handle and of course it didn’t budge. If he had his crutch, he might be able to force it open but whoever brought him here was smart. He moved his ear against the door. He thought he heard talking but it was quiet. And no one he recognized.

A loud beep startled him, pulling his attention to the ceiling. What he thought was a vent was a speaker. He glared at it as though whoever was on the other side could see him.

“I’m sorry for the sudden relocation. But I couldn’t have you getting hurt and tipping off Michael.” A chill ran down his spine. Was that… Flint? “I have my orders. But you’re still my brother. I won’t let him get to you.”

“Flint! Who are you talking about?” No response. He cursed and grabbed for the door again. Why was his brother apart of this?

If he could just get enough momentum, he could break the door. Though only having one leg made that hard. He heard the lock on the door click open. His eyes widened as he tried to stumble back though only succeeded in falling down. He hated this.

“We have direct orders not to hurt you, but if you keep trying to get out, we will sedate you,” an armed guard said as he pushed the door open. Alex didn’t recognize him.

“You can’t seriously think this is the right way to treat a Captain,” he scolded. Trying to appeal to a sense of authority was a long shot. They were probably getting orders from someone much higher than him.

“I’m sorry sir, but it’s for your protection.” Bullshit.

“Who’s giving the orders? Flint?” He tried to push himself off the ground.

“It’s classified sir… Do you need help?” He hated the question. But he knew an opportunity when he saw one. He planted his one foot and reached out a hand.

“If you don’t mind,” he said, hoping he’d take the bait. The soldier reached down to grab his hand, pulling him up. Once Alex had his footing, he twisted the soldier’s arm, forcing him to spin.

He wrapped his other arm around his neck. The soldier grunted and pushed backwards. Alex stumbled but held on. If he went down, this guy was going with him. The soldier tried slamming him back against the wall. He flinched.

I’m sorry Michael.

He needed to get out of here. But this soldier would hurt him if he tried. Alex felt himself flipping over. His back slammed to the ground, knocking the wind out of him.

The soldier called for backup but Alex recovered quickly. He spun on the floor and kicked at the soldiers’ knee. He went down and Alex tried to ignore the snap he thought he heard. He scrambled to climb over him and out the door.

He made it out the door but the guy grabbed his leg. Alex jerked his leg from his hold, crawling toward the stairs. He wasn’t staying here any longer. This was obviously a residential house. Was too nice to be a military facility.

The door at the top of the stairs was pulled open. The pounding of boots thundered down the stairs. The other soldiers grabbed him immediately. He flailed as much as he could but punching bullet proof armor hurt.

“We’re not going to hurt you, please stop struggling!” Alex managed to pull one of his arms free but it was immediately grabbed and pinned behind his back.

“Bullshit! You’re stupid if you think no one will notice I’m gone.”

“We’ve thought of that. There’s an adequate distraction that should keep anyone away until we can move you to a different location.”

He pulled a syringe out of a pocket. Alex struggled until everything went black.

Michael hated this. Hate wasn’t even a strong enough word. Forrest had all but accused him of being the one who took Alex and hid him away. Whatever his problem was, Michael was struggling to hold himself back from punching him.

“I asked you where we’re going? Why is that such a hard question to answer?” Forrest sat in the seat next to him.

“And I told you that if you wanted to help, you’d have to trust me,” he snapped back.

When he had shown up at Alex’s house, Forrest had pulled a gun on him. He claimed it was because he thought someone was coming back to clear up evidence. He had looked around for the blood he claimed he found.

There was a splatter near the door. He had checked to make sure it wasn’t paint. It was blood but not Alex’s.

He pulled off the road toward the barn where the first operation had taken place. He gripped the steering wheel as Forrest tapped his fingers on the door.

“Would you knock it off? You act like I’m taking you somewhere to kill you,” he joked dryly. Forrest shot a glare at him but stopped the tapping.

“For all I know you are.” Michael’s grip on the steering wheel tightened. There it was again. What had happened since the last time they had seen each other? At least then he was pleasant to be around. Even if he was too touchy with Alex.

Not that Alex seems to mind.

He cursed his own thoughts. He couldn’t be getting jealous now.

“If there’s something you wanna accuse me of, just say it,” he snapped. Forrest didn’t take the bait. They rolled up to the abandoned barn. Michael was out of the car first, jogging toward the doors.

Before he had the chance to push them open, he was jerked back by Forrest. He shook his head, starting to laugh before turning towards him fully. So they were really going to do this right now?

“You can’t just go storming in there! They could kill him!” Forrest glared at him.

“He won’t get hurt. Not while I’m around,” he said, turning back toward the doors.

“What you think you’re some destined protector? How full of yourself can you be,” he snapped? Oh, if only he knew… if only he…

“Actually yea. That’s exactly what I am,” he snapped back, spinning to face him. He wasn’t thinking about the words coming out of his mouth. He just needed him to understand what Alex meant to him. How he wouldn’t let anything hurt him.

“Not that you would know anything about it but, Alex and I have history. Literally. Thousands of years of it! But maybe you would know. What exactly did you learn from all your snooping to make you so suspicious of me?” Michael stepped into his personal space. This guy was holding something against him and he needed to know what.

Forrest shoved him back. He didn’t stumble but he made note that it wouldn’t be a great idea to try and fight him hand to hand.

“I know you’ve got a bad habit of getting drunk and starting bar fights. I know you can’t hold a steady job. I know you start relationships then cheat. Alex deserves better than that. He deserves better than mixed signals and old flames that couldn’t fight for him.”

Michael clenched his fists. Technically he never dated between Alex and Maria. The people who said otherwise just assumed. And where was he getting the information anyway? It was off.

“First of all. I haven’t started a drunk bar fight in at least a year. Second,” he took a step toward him again. “I’ve been working at Sanders Auto for years. And third… If you want to lump me in with the stereotype that bisexual people are more likely to cheat? That’s your fucked-up opinion.”

Forrest seemed to recoil. He blinked a few times thinking through whatever information he had.

“I will agree with you that Alex deserves better than me. But by this conversation, he also deserves better than you.” He turned away and shoved the barn doors open.

Alex wasn’t here. He knew it before even getting out of the car. The mark pulled him in a direction. He needed to stop here first. Get this discussion out of the way. He knew it was coming when Forrest had pulled a gun on him.

They looked around in silence. Scuffs and stains from a week ago were still here. Bullet holes littered the walls. Michael lifted a hand to the mark. Something wasn’t…

Pain shot down his spine and spread to his whole back. He collapsed, grunting. He grinded his teeth together. It felt like someone had body slammed him. Forrest rushed up to him.

“Michael! What’s going on?” The concern was genuine. At least there was that.

He cursed under his breath. It was Alex. It had to be. A new pain spread on his right hand, though not as intense. He could feel the bruise forming on his back. Wherever he was, he was fighting. He couldn’t stop the small grin.

“This is hardly the time to be laughing. What happened?” He had almost forgotten Forrest was there. He sighed and stood slowly.

“Nothing. I’m fine,” he said. It hurt but he could ignore it.

“The last time I checked, people don’t just collapse for no reason.”

“Alex is fighting. So we don’t have time to be talking about me,” he said, moving back towards the doors. The ache was persistent but he could ignore it. The only thing that mattered was finding Alex.

He could hear Forrest jogging after him. The mark on his chest pulled him in a direction. All he had to do was follow it. They jumped into his truck. The radio hadn’t been on before but now it made all sorts of static sounds, flipping between channels. Michael groaned. Was it finally time to rip the thing out?

Drive… faster…

“What’s wrong with your radio,” Forrest asked as they pulled back onto the road?

“Don’t know. Just turn it down and ignore it.” Ignore it he said. And yet it made sense. He wanted to push this old thing as far as he could. It had happened the previous day too.

He pressed the gas, forcing the car well above the speed limit. He hopped he could use Forrest to get out of any tickets if he got pulled over. Forrest asked where they were going.

“Just got a feeling,” he mumbled out, not thinking.

“You’re looking for Alex based on a feeling?” He laughed in disbelief, shaking his head. “You’re crazy.”

“And yet you’re here. Can’t be that crazy,” he pointed out. Forrest didn’t say much else.

The road of course didn’t lead straight to Alex. They turned around multiple times. Turning onto roads Michael had never been on. If the car broke down here, they’d be screwed. Forrest had pointed out that they lost cell service a while ago.

He was close. But Michael couldn’t see anything. It’s like they were driving in circles. Actually that’s exactly what they were doing. Michael turned right on every road they came to. There was nothing but cactus and rocks.

“Hey. Why don’t we stop and walk?”

“Now who sounds crazy? It’s the middle of the afternoon in the dessert. We will literally die.”

“You asked me to trust you. How about you trust me?” He gripped the steering wheel. Michael couldn’t exactly argue. The bruise on his hand and back weren’t hurting any less.

He pulled to the dirt on the side of the road and looked around. There was still nothing except some boulders they had passed twice now. Being able to see the waves of heat over the sand didn’t inspire confidence.

If he was sweating, it evaporated before he felt it. He walked next to Forrest who seemed to know exactly where he was going. Something felt off. He was too confident.

“What exactly is your plan here,” he questioned, mouth already dry.

“If I’m not mistaken, there’s old mines under this valley. There has to be a way down.”

“And if you are mistaken?”

“Did you want to keep driving in circles until the truck ran out of gas?” Michael shot a glare in his direction. He didn’t answer the question.

The boulder he had seen got closer and Michael realized it was bigger than he originally thought. The old turquoise mines were closer to Roswell and in the opposite direction. Caves had been carved into the boulders for an entrance. What was Forrest talking about?

They stepped around the boulder and sure enough there was a hole carved into the rock and a staircase down. The feeling in Michael’s chest pulled him forward. He tried to let Forrest lead the way but all he wanted was to sprint ahead.

Suddenly the ground shook, forcing them to blindly grab for the wall. An earthquake? No, this was familiar to Michael. He pulled himself up and sprinted as much as he could, leaving Forrest behind as he called after him.

The yelling was distant. If the bed hadn’t been shaking so much Alex might have slept through it. Although his arm wasn’t in the most comfortable position. He tried to move it down to his side like he usually slept but the cold metal against his wrist stopped him.

He pried his eyes open to look up at the handcuffs that held him to the bed. He tugged half-heartedly, knowing he couldn’t fight too hard without hurting Michael. He cursed the curse. Everything was about Michael. All he could do was wait for openings that may or may not come.

The shouting got louder and the room still shook. Guns were being fired. He stood slowly, not that he could go anywhere. He could feel the pull in his chest. Michael was close.

Another crack jolted the room. For a moment he was back overseas, holding onto an injured soldier. Taking cover from the ambush. He shook his head.

“Manes!” The door was flung open, door frame splintering from the force. The yelling escalated; shots could be heard but nothing seemed to hit her.

“Tessa!” She shook her head and gave a small smile.

“Getting real tired of saving your ass. Michael’s on his way, so let’s go.” His heart flipped. She moved toward him and broke the cuffs.

“Stop! I will shoot if you don’t get away from him!” Alex watched as Tessa huffed and rolled her eyes.

“Stay behind me,” she mumbled to him before turning around. He looked past her to the soldier that had probably just signed his death sentence. But if she was still the person he knew overseas, she was merciful. Come to think of it, she probably knew exactly who was dangerous and who wasn’t.

“Look, I know you’re just doing your job and everything so let me tell you that I’m just doing mine. I don’t want to hurt you, but I’m walking out of here with him regardless.” She sounded almost bored. He didn’t flinch.

“One more chance to step away from him,” the soldier threatened. Tessa just shook her head.

Alex heard the gun fire but there was no explosion of material. No rush of warmth from a bullet hole. No screaming. Everything slowed. Feeling like he was floating in Jell-o, he looked around. Tessa moved toward the soldier, grabbing the bullet out of the air. She quickly took his gun and emptied the bullets onto the floor.

Full speed, the soldier stumbled, confusion covered his face. His gun on the ground, empty. No evidence of having shat it at all. Then he noticed Tessa. She shoved him back with superhuman strength. He collapsed unconscious against the opposite wall.

She turned to face him and grinned sheepishly. Alex could help but chuckle. She did warn him. Tessa reached a hand toward him. He took it and she pulled him off the bed, offering him as much support as she could while walking.

They hobbled out of the room together and toward the stairs. The tug in Alex’s chest was getting stronger. Michael was here. He had come for him.

“Alex!” Forrest? What the hell was he doing here? He jumped down the last couple stairs but froze when he saw Tessa. He drew his gun immediately. Alex looked around briefly for Michael. He was here… wasn’t he?

“Hold on! She’s a friend!” He held his hand up to stop Forrest from shooting. His eyes flicked between the two of them before he lowered his gun slowly, though not entirely relaxed. Alex’s shoulders sagged in relief but he could tell Tessa was still tense. He glanced over at her. Her eyebrows were drawn together, her grip on his wrist tightening.

“I came looking for you as soon as I showed up at your place and you weren’t there.”

“Just you,” she questioned?

“Who else would be with me?” No. Alex could feel him. Michael was here.

Shouting came from behind Forrest. He glanced behind him before reaching for Alex’s free hand. “We need to go.” Tessa pulled Alex back slightly.

“How’d you find this place? It’s in the middle of nowhere and the entrance is hidden.”

“I’m part of the Marines. I know where hostages are kept.”

“Except this facility isn’t for hostages. It’s a classified mission base,” she said accusingly. Forrest blinked and looked over his shoulder again. Alex felt his heart breaking as he started connecting the dots himself.

“Where’s Michael,” he asked, low and threatening. Forrest looked back at him, an apology already written on his face. He didn’t get to say anything. A hand grabbed his shoulder, moving him to the side. Flint stood there looking tired and worried.

“Michael is in the process of being moved to a new location. Somewhere he can’t hurt you. I know our father did some awful things to you when we were younger but he’s trying to protect you now.”

Alex’s mouth dropped open. He couldn’t be serious. His father was using Flint? Tessa laughed beside him.

“Look. I don’t know what daddy told you, but it was a lie. These two are far better off together than apart.” He finally seemed to acknowledge her. Did he know what she was? If he did, there’s no way he would be so calm about this.

“Who are you? Some friend of Michael’s?” She grinned.

“Something like that. More an old friend of Alex’s.” Flint shrugged and the radio on his shoulder beeped.

Sir, the terrorist is sedated and we’re moving him to the car.

Panic set into Alex’s stomach. They were going to torture him. And if they deemed that he had no use… they…

His leg gave out from under him, forcing all of his weight onto Tessa. She held him steady. Anger spread through his body. If he just had his other leg…

His shoulders shook. Rage blinded him. He glared at Flint and Forrest, who had sunk behind his brother. How dare they play with him like this! He dug his nails into his palm

“You’re delusional if you think our father had any good intentions,” he snapped. “You can never separate Michael and I. We will always find each other. And you,” He met Forrest’s eyes, “You are dead to me.” He flinched as though he had actually cared.

Alex looked away from them in disgust. Maybe if he had been able to go to college instead of war, he would have studied psychology while working on his music. Maybe he could have some idea of why they did this to him.

A glint of metal caught his eye. His prosthetic sat in the corner against the wall. Tessa followed his line of sight. He wouldn’t have time to put it on but he needed to have it. Those things weren’t cheap.

Alex lifted a hand to his chest. The pull of the mark was moving away. They needed to go. They didn’t seem interested in hurting them anymore so Alex hopped in the direction of the prosthetic, Tessa moving him faster than he would go alone.

Even if his brother didn’t want to hurt them, he doubted he would just let them walk out of here. He leaned down to grab the prosthetic, tucking it under his arm.

“Got a plan to get us out of here,” he murmured?

“Something spectacular or quick,” she asked, a grin settling on her face.

“We have to get to Michael.” She nodded and turned them around.

“Just hold on tight.” She wrapped an arm around him tighter. “Sorry to cut this short but we’re out of here.” Alex will never forget the look on their faces. He saw them for less than a second but the astonished mouth hanging open as they practically phased through them and up the stairs threatened to make him laugh way more than any of this should.

They jolted to a stop when they hit the desert heat. He looked around as much as he could, eyes adjusting to the sudden bright light of the area. The tracks of the truck hadn’t blown away. He followed them out and he could just barely see it in the distance.

The adrenaline raced through his veins; he wanted more than anything to start sprinting after it. He looked over at Tessa.

“Let’s go get that idiot. We have real things to talk about.”

#malex #malex fanfiction #roswell new mexico fic #malex soulmate au #michael guerin/alex manes #multichapter fic #feedback always appreciated

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neeterloveschenford · 4 years

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Thoughts on RNM 2x13

Howdy partners! Well here we are at the end of the season. Even though I didn’t have to work today and was able to watch last night, I needed time to process what happened. I also was very interested in all the diverging opinions last night and today over everything that happened with Malex. I am still smiling when I think about all that went down. (And I know I keep harping on this, but I am NOT a positive person outside of this show. Every time I talk about how hopeful I am to my two friends at work who are are fandom junkies, they are like Damn Dawnita, when’d you get so positive! But I digress.) All in all I was very pleased with this episode. And it sure as heck was loads better than last year’s finale. So without further ado, let’s dive in shall we!

Things I Liked:

-Badass science goddess Liz saving the day! She’s amazing. I love her. And Isobel also being a badass containing the fire! That’s my girls!

-Glad Charlie was rescued! At least Helena did something right.

- Gregory Manes is bestest brother to ever brother and I would take a bullet for him. And even thought I really love Trevor St John and thought Jesse was a very compelling villain, I am glad Jesse’s dead. It was time for him to go. He was getting too comic book villain.

- Even though I have some issues with Max, I am glad he’s ok. I did not want to revisit the save Max at all costs storyline.

- Liz getting recognition for her brilliance is nice, But we know Diego shady, so.......

- “Witch serum” made me snort. Also, Maria knows what’s what. I still maintain she’s feeling Michael’s leftover emotions from Alex’s kidnapping now that she’s not wearing the bracelet.

- Well, it took several episodes, but Max finally was supportive of Isobel without making it all about himself. She is pretty amazing and it’s about time he told her.

- Isobel acts all hard and tough, but she wants to find real love so badly!

- They FINALLY faced their trauma from the tool shed! Michael handing Alex that hammer was so symbolic. Alex angry screams. God baby I wanna give you all the hugs!

- Of course there was a dead body! Poor Tripp!

- I am totally loving the brotp of Max and Cam. She gets so much joy dragging him. They make me laugh every time they are together.

- I think the M!luca I love you’s were handled well. I’m not upset that she got an I love you before Alex. I mean haven’t we gotten these epic declarations from Malex over the last two seasons? I’ll take and I never look away, not really over a simple I love you any day of the week. And what’s so wrong with them actually loving each other? Maria KNOWS she’s not Michael’s cosmic love. She realizes that, yes, Michael would have risked his life to save her. But I think he would have gone to the others first and not just dropped everything to save her. And it’s not a bad thing to love someone but know that in the long run they are not the one you’re supposed to spend your life with. I have an ex-boyfriend that I still think is one of the finest people I’ve ever met and I love him dearly. But we just weren’t meant for the long haul. I think this is what Michael and Maria will be to each other. (Ok, enough of that.)

- Tripp and Nora (sigh!) I just love their romance. The fact that Tripp used the word cosmic just melted my heart. And the Malex look when Alex read that. I just died a little. Such a beautiful parallel.

- Drunk acting Jenna is perfection. And she’s right! Women should tell other women when they’re beautiful!

- So what’s wrong with Max’s heart? I want to see that x-ray Kyle.

- I like that Isobel ships Tripp and Nora. Same girl. Tell me more boys.

-”Can we all cowboy up and focus please?” I love it when Isobel sasses. She’s the best. And can we have more bro moments between Max and Michael please? It’s some of the few times Max doesn’t get on my nerves.

-How many times are the Manes/Truman couples going to break my heart? Tripp had to leave her. (SOB) He doesn’t a family without her!

-I really want to know about the date June 14, 1997. Why will they be safer 50 years from then?

-Loved the Jenna/Charlie reunion. Glad Charlie decided to stick around.

- This Echo fight has been too long coming. They have held things back from each other every single time they had any kind of conflict. It was bound to boil over. And they are both right. Liz was taking things too far. Max makes decisions without consulting anyone else. They both needed to be called out on their behaviors.

- I adore the sisters Ortecho. I would watch a whole show just about Liz and Rosa. (With plenty of Arturo moments.)

- Finally some Kylex! It was flawless. It gave us hope for Flint’s redemption and acknowledged how Alex has forgiven Kyle. In Alex’s mind, if Kyle can change, then anyone can. Give me more of them in season 3 please and thank you.

- Alex’s song! It just gutted me. Tyler is so incredibly talented. And the look on Michael’s face when he realized it was Alex singing. Then when Alex saw Michael. These two goobers! Ugh! (Ok I’m going to delve into more of this at the end. I have a lot to say.)

- Rosa telling Helena loves her but she needs to leave them alone was beautiful. This is Rosa growing up. She’s not the angry teenager anymore.

- “We are sick of being pissed at you for being obnoxiously yourself.” Same Michael, same.

- I’m not sure if I like or don’t like Max 1.0. Although I will be obnoxiously saying Howdy partner from now on. And I want to know about him being the stowaway. (Hey, we got an answer to something!)

Things I Didn’t Like:

- Gotta say I didn’t enjoy Crash Con. Glad it was over and done with quick.

- So did anyone wonder what was actually wrong with Maria at the hospital? Michael said she had surgery, but for what? I’m assuming it was for internal bleeding, but most people don’t just spontaneously start bleeding internally.

- Of course Jesse gets to die a hero. But who covered it up? Was it Alex? Is there someone else involved int PS that we don’t know about yet?

- Diego, you are just shady and I don’t like you. I was rooting for you too. Shame.

- Is it bad that I really don’t care about Steph? It is? Guess I’m resigned to just being bad. Cause I just don’t care. Congratulations you didn’t die.

- Max! You couldn’t have just taken everything, or called Liz or even Alex? Wrong move dude. Seriously dude.

- That’s the building you blew up? I am not impressed. That was a waste of f/x.

- No romantic gesture from Max to try to get Liz to stay. Just goes to show how off the deep end Max really is at this point.

- The stowaway’s beard upsets me.

Malex:

Ok here’s where I’m going to dive into the deep end of my Malex feels. First of all, I did not take Alex performing as his big love declaration. He didn’t tell most people that he was going to sing. Even Kyle didn’t know. He had no idea that Michael was going to walk in at that moment. And since it’s been at least a week, maybe more, since Crash Con, I think Alex and Forrest were already seeing each other casually. Obviously, since Forrest at least knew he was singing, they have had some kind of contact. And Michael’s reaction was probably the most Michael thing he’s done all season. Michael sacrifices himself for other people’s happiness. When he looked over and saw the besotted look on Forrest’s face, he knew that Forrest could give Alex something in that moment that Michael couldn’t. Stability. Michael is just now realizing that he can’t blame all of their problems on Alex walking away or the despicable acts of the Manes family. He knows that if he’s going to good for the one person in this world that he wants to be good for, then he’s going to have to work to get there. He can’t hide in his relationship with Maria anymore. He has no choice but to face his problems head on and change for the better. I’ve seen so many people upset that they didn’t have a conversation after the song, but did they need to? They have hashed this out over and over again almost every episode this season. Despite talking in past tense, they know how much they love each other. Michael built a bomb that would kill himself and every alien on the planet just to save Alex. Alex wrote and performed a freaking love song about Michael. Michael knows that he has to deal with his traumas before he can be with Alex. But for the first time in forever he’s confident that they will find their way back to each other. And he would be a complete hypocrite if he asked Alex to wait for him and not get involved with Forrest. Michael wasn’t exactly celibate during the lost years. Also, I don’t think we’re going to get the big love triangle that we got this season. I don’t think Forrest and Alex are going to be a super heavy romance. As far as we know Forrest isn’t looking to lose himself in a relationship like Michael and frankly Maria were. So I’m not worried about them at all. And with a big time jump to deal with Covid-19, they can even have the relationship end organically. Alex could get deployed somewhere and they realize that they are better off as friend. Then Alex can come back and Michael will have worked on being a better person and they can start over again. And it will be glorious, because once those two work it out, that’s it. They are going straight into domestic bliss. They might even start a little dad band!

So that’s all I’ve got for now. I have many more thoughts, but this is probably the longest review yet, so I will be back with more theories and such at a later date. I am planning on a little project for the lengthy hiatus where I write my thoughts on each individual character. Some will be short because they are minor characters without much backstory. Some will be huge and no one will finish it because Dawnita says way too much about certain things! But until then, I hope you all stay safe and healthy. Till later my lovlies!

#roswell new mexico #long post #like really long post #season 2 episode 13 #spoilers #speculations #malex #as always #like seriously #sorry for the long post

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hms-chill · 4 years

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The Two Princes

Summary: An AU based on the podcast The Two Princes. When Prince Henry sets out to break the mysterious curse that's destroying his kingdom, he's ready to face whatever dastardly villain or vile monster stands in his way. What he isn't prepared for are the bewildering new emotions he feels when he meets the handsome Alex, a rival prince on a quest to save his own realm. Forced to team up, the two princes soon discover that the only thing more difficult than saving their kingdoms is following their hearts.

Chapter 1: Once Upon a Time

It's late at night in the Kingdom of the West when a shadow slips quietly down the castle's east corridor. It moves away from the royal vault with the silent confidence of someone prepared for just such a heist as this one, a parcel clutched under one arm. As it disappears around a corner, a dog starts to bark. Guards clamor. The shadow grips his prize closer and runs. His heart pounds, his breath comes in gasps, his chest heaving against the heavy book clutched to it. He's almost out, almost to the village that surrounds the castle. Once there, he can find an alleyway and find out what's really going on in the kingdom. Just a sprint through the courtyard and he's there.

He rounds the corner to the courtyard and is met with a host of guards, swords drawn. Behind them, the gate he'd opened earlier is slowly closing. He could still try to escape, but he knows it won't go well.

The book is ripped from his hands, a guard already taking it back to the locked vault where it belongs, keeping both it and the knowledge it contains safe from anyone who would misuse it. Or really, anyone who would dare glance at its pages. The thief is tied up and dragged to the throne room, shoved to his knees before the queen. His head hangs, and his shoulders slump forward in defeat.

"Well, villain, you led our knights on quite a chase," Queen Mary says. "Now, take off that cloak and uncover your face. A guard pulls off the hood, and the room gasps as Prince Henry blinks in the sudden light.

"Henry?"

"Hi, Gran." With that, Mary stands, grabs her grandson by the ear, and pulls him toward their personal chambers. She ignores his complaints until they’re alone, then slams the door and turns on him.

"Oh, you are in big trouble this time. How dare you embarrass me like that?”

“I’m sorry! I know the forbidden book is, well, forbidden, but I have so many questions about the forest, and no one will talk to me, but that book—“

“Maybe no one will talk to you because there’s nothing worth talking about, Henry.”

“It’s taking over our kingdom!”

“It’s not taking over anything.”

“There are trees and vines everywhere. You can’t cross the street without tripping over them! They’re killing our crops, and the animals we hunt for food have all left, and livestock don’t have anything to eat. Our kingdom is being squeezed to death, and no one is doing anything about it. From what I've been able to put together, this all started in the heart of the forest; if we go there—“

“No one is setting foot in that forest! Besides, even if this were a problem, it wouldn’t be your responsibility. You’re a child!”

"Stop that! Stop dismissing me; I'm almost eighteen." He's snapping at her now, and he knows that's not a good idea, but he can't help it.

"Henry! Such an ungrateful child. We have a wonderful life, with a beautiful castle and marvelous parties. Until recently, our people have been moderately happy with us. We have no reason to go looking for trouble.”

"Our kingdom is on the verge of collapse! We don't need to go looking for trouble; it's found us."

“Oh, Henry." She's got a hand on his shoulder, and for a second, Henry's reminded of his Mum. But Mum hasn't talked to him like this in years; not since they got word of his dad's death. "You have so much to learn about how to rule," his gran continues, "but the first rule is simple: ‘life can be perfect, as long as you don’t look too close.’”

“Gran, that sounds... criminally incompetent."

"Well, if you don't like that lesson, How's this one? You're grounded." She's taken her hand off his shoulder, and any memory of his Mum is gone. She turns on her heel and storms out of his room, pulling the door shut behind her, and Henry hears the lock click.

"Hey! You can't lock me in my room forever!"

"You're welcome to try to climb out your window and scale down the tower again, but I warn you, there are fresh crocodiles in the moat, and I've been much too busy to feed them. Kisses!" With that, Henry knows she's gone. He sinks to the floor with a sigh, his back pressed against the door as he buries his face in his arms. There's a wet nose pressed against his cheek, and he reaches over to rub David's ears.

"Hey, bud. Looks like we're grounded. Again." David whines, climbing into Henry's lap as Henry sighs, leaning his head back against the door. He is so, so tired of being treated like a child. He's tired of being talked down to and underestimated and ignored. And all of a sudden, he misses his dad. If his dad were here, then he and Henry's mum would do something. Even better, they would have stopped the forest before it ever became a problem. They would have fought it back together years ago, and they wouldn't have to worry about anything. Gran wouldn't be driving him and everyone else up the wall, and the kingdom wouldn't be on the verge of collapse, and Henry wouldn't be alone.

Eventually, at David's gentle urging, Henry gets up from the floor and calls into bed. David hops in to join him, his head resting on Henry's side and rising and falling with Henry's breaths. Henry falls asleep eventually, but the forrest invades his dreams, twisting vines twirling through his subconscious as a rumbling invades his room. He wakes up with a start, but the rumbling continues, swirling around him until it coalesces into a whispering voice: “Come to me. Henry, come to me. Come… to the forest.”

The voice disappears in a clap of thunder, and the next thing Henry knows, he’s waking up on the floor, his gran and her entourage sweeping into the room.

"Rise and shine!" she announces, pulling him off the floor and scolding David as he barks. Henry groans.

"I had the weirdest dream last night. There was this voice—"

"That's nice, now stop talking," Gran interrupts. She throws open the curtains, and light streams into the room. Henry rubs at his eyes as she announces, "I have the most wonderful surprise for you. I was thinking about what you said, and you’re right, it is time I stopped treating you like a child and started treating you like the great prince I know you can be.”

Henry scrambles to his feet, barely able to believe his ears. “Wait, for real? You mean that? So you’re going to let me go to the forest?”

“What? Of course not; I should have been more clear. You’re not stepping foot in that forest. No, I was thinking, since you’re turning eighteen, wouldn’t it be something if I threw you a great big, once-in-a-lifetime—“

"Party." All the excitement is gone in a heartbeat.

"—Wedding!"

"What?"

"I know! Genius. People love a royal wedding. They laugh, they cry, they eat too much cake..."

"I know what you're doing. I am not getting married just because you want a distraction."

"Well obviously, silly. You're getting married for love." She tries to rest a hand on his shoulder, but Henry shrugs it off the second it lands.

"But I'm not in love."

"Oh, dear, is that what you're worried about? Don’t you give it a second thought. I’ve taken care of everything.”

“Wait, what does that mean?” It sounds almost reasonable, and coming from his gran, he doesn’t trust it for a moment. There’s a knock on the door, and despite Henry’s protestations that he’s in his pajamas and in no way ready to face anyone, his Gran throws it wide, shushing him. Shaan, her chamberlain, comes in, and Henry relaxes a bit. Shaan has always been the most understanding of his grandmother’s staffers, so maybe he’ll be able to talk some sense into her.

“Have you finished the proclamation?” she asks, looking smug.

“Yes, your majesty. Would you like to hear it?”

“If you would be so good.”

He clears his throat, unrolling a scroll in front of his face. “To all the eligible young ladies of the kingdom, are you tired of being unmarried and unloved? Do you crave meaning in your otherwise meaningless existence? Then bring your dancing shoes, an itemized dowry, and a list of family connections to her majesty’s royal ball, where you can win the opportunity to marry His Royal Highness Prince Henry George Edward James Fox Moutchristen-Windsor—“

“What?!” Henry interrupts, and Shaan spares him an apologetic glance before going back to reading.

“--That’s right, at the conclusion of tonight’s ball, the prince will pluck one lucky lady from a life of obscurity and mediocrity by joining with her in holy matrimony. Draw bridge opens promptly at eight PM.”

Henry gawks at his grandmother and Shaan, but his grandmother just smiles. “Perfection. Send it out immediately.”

“Yes, your majesty.” Shaan turns to the door, sparing a last apologetic look toward Henry.

“Wait, no, you can’t—“ the door shuts, and Henry turns to his gran. “Call him back. Gran, call him back right now.”

“Don’t be silly. Shaan is a very busy man, and between you and me, I do not pay him enough for what I put him through. Now. Let’s figure out what you’re going to wear to the ball. I know this is a rather bold suggestion, but I’m thinking: ruffles.”

She holds up a disgustingly ruffled shirt, and Henry swats it away. “Gran, enough! No! I don’t care what scheme you’ve concocted or what kind of distraction you need, but I’m not tying the knot with a complete stranger just so you don’t have to face the reality of what’s happening to our kingdom! I refuse to be a part of this insanity any longer. Do you understand? This is me, putting my foot down. I’m not getting married, and I will go to the forest and break the curse, and there is nothing you or anyone else can do to stop me.”

She sighs, coming closer to rest a hand on his shoulder again. “Oh, Henry. I’m so sorry. I know how ridiculous I must seem to you, but you must believe me, I only want what’s best for you.”

With that, Henry feels all the fight drain out of him. His shoulders slump, and when he speaks, his voice is quieter than it has been all morning. “I know.”

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to protect you, nothing. You have to believe that.” Her hand moves to cup his face, and Henry closes his eyes and lets himself believe she actually means it.

“I do. Of course I do.”

“Good. I knew you’d understand.” Her tone is suddenly cold again, and Henry has only a split second to process the shift before she calls, “guards!”

“Wait, what? What are you doing?” He demands, moving away and watching as armored guards fill his room.

“Escort Prince Henry to the royal ballroom and tie him to his throne.”

"What?"

“Come this way, your highness,” a guard tells him, grabbing his arm. Henry struggles, but just like last night, he’s no match for the guard.

“No! Hey! Get your hands off of me!”

“I’ll see you at the ball, sweetie,” his gran says, waving as he’s dragged out the door. David’s barking furiously, but another guard has him held back, so he’s powerless to help Henry.

“You can’t tie me up for the rest of the day! What if I have to go to the bathroom?”

“Just hold it, dear. Hold it. For love,” she coos, and the door shuts behind them. Henry gives up fighting, his mind going into overdrive. Maybe he can convince one of the guards to let him go. Philip, the captain of the guard, used to play with him when they were kids. But he sees Philip in the throne room and knows it’s useless. Philip won’t see anything wrong with of all of this. Maybe he can wriggle out of his ropes, or David will come chew him free. Maybe… but he already knows escape from here is hopeless. Once the ball starts, the room will be full enough that there’s a chance he can make his escape. And his gran can’t marry him off if he refuses to go through with the ceremony. He’ll have a chance then, but for now, he’s resigned to waiting.

He watches the clock tick, and at eight PM, the ballroom starts to fill with ladies from around the kingdom. Shaan, stationed behind him, announces them as they come in.

“The lady Verbena. The lady Beatrice. The lady Dorcus.”

From his other side, Henry’s Gran leans forward and says “do try to smile, love. No girl wants a sour puss for a husband.”

“Maybe I’d feel like smiling if these ropes weren’t cutting off my circulation,” he growls at her. She’d come in and secured them herself just before the party, and she’s stronger than she looks.

“The lady June,” Shaan announces, and Henry turns to look at her. He can see her take in the situation for a moment, then that calculating look drops away in favor of a big smile and wide eyes.

“OMG, your highness! It is so great to finally meet you. I am fangirling so hard right now! I am like…obsessed with you.”

“The pleasure is all mine,” Henry deadpans. She gives him what might be a sympathetic look before it disappears again behind a bubbly mask.

“Can I just say, I love your outfit? The whole pajamas-and-bondage thing is like…so brave.”

“Um, Lady June, why don’t you tell the prince all about that extremely interesting book you were reading yesterday?” His gran asks, her tone belying just a bit of annoyance. June looks at her with wide eyes.

“Book? What book?”

“The book, dear. The one we discussed,” his gran says, and based on her tone, Henry knows her eyes must be boring holes into June right now. June steadfastly maintains her facade of innocence.

“Oh, right! The book, wink wink. So the other day, I was totally reading this amazing book all about wagons—“

“Dragons.” At this point, Gran just sounds defeated.

“Right, dragons! I’m just like…so obsessed with dragons. I looove reading about them, and talking about them, and spending my life with a certain prince who also has a fondness for smelly, disgusting, fire breathing monsters.” She’s leaned in close to the throne now, and only Henry can hear when she murmurs an apology. Maybe, if he has to pick someone at the end of the night, he’ll pick her, and she’ll help him find a way to escape the wedding. He murmurs a thanks as his gran claps her hands.

“Well, you hear that, Henry? Lady June likes books and dragons! Two of your favorite things!” Gran exclaims, though she and Henry can both tell that the character June’s playing is anything but interested in either of those topics.

“Uh huh. What was the name of the book?”

“Oh, Henry, don’t badger the poor girl—“ his gran starts, but June is having none of it.

She pulls back, the fake smiley persona reinstated. “Trick question! Books don’t have titles.”

“Alright, Lady June, thanks for stopping by. Be sure to enjoy the rest of the party.”

“You didn’t really think that was going to work, did you?”

“Honestly, I thought the odds were 50/50. Now, if you’ll excuse me, Lady Marjorie just arrived, and I have to go say something devastating about her outfit. Don’t fall in love without me!” With that, she sails off into the crowd, leaving Henry to tug at the ropes still tying him to the throne.

“Ugh, this night is never going to end,” he groans aloud.

“Unfortunately not, your highness.” Shaan’s voice from behind him makes him jump, then blush.

“Sorry, Shaan. I didn’t realize you were still here.”

“It’s quite alright. I often forget I’m here myself. You know, you may find this hard to believe, but I was in a…similar situation when I was your age.”

“Oh, really? Did your grandmother tie you to a throne in your pajamas and parade you in front of every girl in the kingdom like a prize pig at a county fair?” He doesn’t mean to snap at Shaan, and he doesn’t deserve it, but Henry can’t fight it. It’s just all getting to be too much, and he’s not sure how long he can sit here before he starts screaming.

“I meant, I too was once expected to marry. And it brought great shame on my family when I refused.”

“You don’t need to lay on the guilt about me doing my duty; Gran’s got that covered, thanks.”

“On the contrary, your highness. While the decision not to marry was a difficult one, I have always stood by my choice, despite what it may have cost me over the years.”

Henry softens. When he looks over at Shaan, the older man is looking out over the crowd, but his usually stoic face is a bit sadder than usual. “Oh. Really? So, you never fell in love? With anyone?”

That gets a bit of a chuckle out of Shaan, though it’s still tinged with sadness. “Oh, goodness, yes. I fell in love many times.”

“Then why didn’t you get married?”

“Because the kingdom was not quite ready for such a marriage.”

“I… I don’t understand.”

“I think your royal highness does.”

“Uh, no, actually, I…I don’t. I mean, I don’t want to get married because I’m seventeen. I mean, whatever you want to get up to in your personal life is up to you; I’m not judging. I—you shouldn’t assume?”

“No, of course not, your highness. Forgive me, if I misspoke.” Any hint of emotion has been wiped off Shaan’s face, but Henry only gets a moment to miss it before Shaan asks, “shall I fetch your grandmother? We still have quite the assortment of eligible ladies waiting to—“

He’s interrupted by a commotion at the front of the room, and Henry strains to see over the mass of people.

“What was that?” The room shakes, and somewhere, he hears June scream as a thick green vine shoves its way through the main door. It bursts into smaller ones, growing more and more quickly as it encompasses the room. Henry can hear swords being drawn amidst the chaos, but he already knows deep down that they won’t do any good.

“The forest is invading! Everyone, take cover. The castle is under attack!” It’s Philip’s voice, and for all the ways he’s hurt him recently, Henry hopes he’s alright. The vines break through the floor, carrying broken pieces of mosaic tile to the ceiling as they curl round pillars and people alike. The guards rush forward to attack, screaming and hacking, but the vines grow to encompass their swords. Then something starts snaking up his leg, and Henry looks down in horror to see the bottom of the throne covered in twisting, snaking vines. He struggles against his restraints, but there’s nothing he can do but groan and tug.

“Somebody, help me!”

No one can hear him, not over the chaos. He pulls and pulls, but suddenly, there’s a sawing noise beside him. He turns to see Shaan carefully cutting at the ropes tying him to the chair, working with the same mechanical precision he applies to everything.

“Thank you,” Henry says, breathless. Shaan nods as Henry pulls himself free, massaging the sore places on his wrists where he’s been tugging against the ropes all night.

“Of course. Now here, take this.”

“What is this?”

“A map. It will take you straight to the Hollow in the heart of the forest, but you must leave immediately. Here. Take my sword—“

“No! I can’t just leave you all in the middle of a battle—“

“You must. The real battle, the battle that will decide the fate of everyone in this kingdom, can only be fought in the Hollow, and only you can fight it.”

“What do you mean?” Henry’s trying to stay calm, but he can hear the fear in his voice.

“There is a prophecy that your grandmother has kept hidden from you. If you want to break the curse, you must get to the Hollow, and once you are there, you must—“

“Look out for the chandelier!” Henry’s not sure who shouts, but suddenly Shaan is rushing forward, shoving Henry out of the way as a chandelier crashes down onto him.

“Shaan!” Henry screams, running to where his head and shoulders are just visible beneath the broken chandelier. “Shaan, can you hear me? Are you okay?”

Shaan’s eyes are unfocused, and he’s clearly struggling to hold his head up. Then his eyes lock onto Henry’s, and he gasps, “go. To the Hollow.”

He slumps down, his eyes closing, and Henry allows himself a single sob before he’s taking Shaan’s sword and running. He goes to his room, changing pajamas for a light armor and finding a sheath for the sword. David whines at his feet, and Henry rubs his ears for a moment before sprinting to the kitchen, where he fills a saddlebag with whatever food he can grab. Then he’s on horseback, galloping away from his home as vines continue to snake around it, though as he looks back over his shoulder, he sees them slowly retreating. He just spurs the horse on, riding as hard as he can for the darkness of the forest.

He urges his horse on, over a last hill and to the pathway through the forest. They’re almost inside when the horse rears on his hind legs, dumping Henry flat on his ass in front of the forest and galloping away with most of the food and supplies. Henry closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, clutching the strap of a satchel that holds the map and a day’s worth of food.

“Okay. So it’ll just take me a little longer to get to the Hollow. I’ve got two legs and a sword and this map; I can do this.” He’s just going to march into a cursed forest to do battle with an unknown evil that’s been terrorizing his kingdom for as long as anyone can remember. What could possibly go wrong?

He could swear he hears the forest whisper his name, the same voice that had invaded his dream the night before. He swallows down the fear before it overtakes him and draws Shaan’s sword.

“Alright, forest. You want me? Here I come."

On AO3

Notes:

When I was thinking about writing in June, I was like "what's the gayest thing I can think of?" and it was this. The whole thing was supposed to be out this month, but then I was protesting and busy, but here we are. -- Also, sometimes you text the group chat "Bi Shaan: thoughts?" and get a bunch of support, so there's my justification for queer Shaan who looks after Henry. The group chat said I could.

Want to support the Hannah-Makes-Art fund? You can tip me in ko-fi here!

#my fic: rwrb #henry fox mountchristen windsor x alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #rwrb au #red white and royal au #rwrb fic #red white and royal blue au #red white and royal blue fic #red white and royal blue #rwrb

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godlyborn · 3 years

Text

start over. / keaton & rory.

date: february 6, 2021 characters: keaton arkwright & rory mikaelsohn summary: keaton and rory talk about everything that’s happened.

Keaton went out for a walk to clear his head of the things that he had been thinking about. Lately he had been talking with his therapist about talking to Rory, mostly apologizing to her, but also talking and re-inviting that part of him back into his life. Keaton was apprehensive about it because he knew Rory had also been through a lot and he didn't want to bring it all back if it was too soon for her. Keaton had been working a lot on doing things for himself and for others, and finding a healthy balance between the two.

With Rory this was hard. He cared so much about Rory, that he was terrified to hurt her anymore than he already had. He just had to take that push. He lowered himself on the ground, at the forrest's edge that was close to the lake, so he was facing the lake. That's when Keaton finally pulled out her number after months and sent a text:

Hey, can we talk? It's okay if you can't. If you want to, I'm in the forrest, near the lake.

All he had to do now, is wait.

Having the day off of work allowed Rory to spend her day wandering the woods, sorting through some thoughts and feelings. Between getting used to a new job, her therapy sessions, the reappearance of multiple Hades children, and Bailey leaving for an unknown period of time - she found her brain unsure of how to handle everything happening. Her best self therapy? Lounging in a tree branch with her eyes closed, taking in the sun on her face and the wind blowing through her hair to ignore the world for just a little while.

Her sense of peace was broken up by her phone vibrating in her pocket, though it took her a minute to find the strength to reach in to grab it. She felt her breath catch in her throat when she saw who it was texting her. She hadn’t heard from Keaton since their mutual breakup, and she found herself nervous to actually see him again for the first time in months. Sure, she knew this conversation had to happen at some point in time, but she still found herself hoping she had more time to get her thoughts in order.

Though, the more she thought about it, the more she realized that having more time wouldn’t solve anything. She wouldn’t magically come up with anything else to say. So letting out a small sigh to try and gather some courage, she replied.

Sure. I’ll be there in a few minutes.

Swinging herself out of the tree and back onto the forest floor, she made the short journey from her spot in the forest to where Keaton said he was waiting. Once she arrived, she saw him sitting where he said he would be, and felt her stomach flip a bit. At the same time, the winds churned erratically around her, the breeze making its way over towards the lake more steps she took in his direction.

When the wind came, Keaton's own stomach did a flip. He knew that wind came before his ex-girlfriend. Keaton watched her step into view. Keaton felt his heart pound in his chest, he didn't think he'd be this nervous. Actually seeing her, made him more nervous than thinking about it.

In front of him, laying on his lap was Sheep. When he felt Keaton turn, Sheep perked up, looking around Keaton curiously, before happily running toward Rory. Keaton let himself smile at her as she stepped closer.

Seeing Keaton turn, she internally cringed at the winds giving her away, silently cursing her power for not cooperating with her for once in her life. Rory gave him a small, nervous smile as their eyes met, but her attention was quickly pulled away from him at the movement she saw in front of him.

Seeing Sheep perk up and immediate charge at her, caused a mix of a laugh and a sob to fall out of her as she dropped to her knees before the dog. “Sheepy!” Her arms came out just in time to wrap them around him, a laugh making it’s way out of her as he immediately started attacking her with kisses. “Hi baby boy, I missed you!” After another few minutes, Sheep happily laid himself on her lap, and she finally looked back up at Keaton, her bright smile turning back into its earlier, nervous state. “Hi.”

Keaton grinned even more watching Sheep with Rory, it felt somewhat nostalgic. It gave Keaton hope that maybe one day they could get to be normal, or at least somewhat normal, no matter what their relationship was. Keaton wasn't going into this thinking they might get back together, he still wasn't even sure if he was ready for that, and the two of them definitely changed over the past few months.

When Rory looked back up at him, he locked eyes with her. "Hi," he replied, not really knowing what else to say. A silence fell upon the two for a moment. "I'm sorry if I dragged you away from anything."

"Oh no, you didn't. Don't worry." She shook her head to emphasis the fact, her hands busying themselves with petting Sheep as he stretched out on her lap. "I was already out here, so it was actually kinda great timing? You know how I am with trees, so." Rory shrugged, also at a loss of what to say. The silence dragged on once again. "So...how've you been?"

Keaton nodded in response to her trees statement. He nodded agin when she asked him how he's been. "Good," he replied, and for once in a long while, he actually meant that, but then he followed it up with, "Honestly." He knew that Rory knew he sometimes lied when he said stuff like that. He wanted to make sure that she knew, he was telling the truth this time. "And you?"

Her head tilted just a bit at his immediate answer, knowing that he was always quick to brush off his own feelings. However, she found herself believing him when he followed it up. She wasn't sure what exactly it was, but he looked better than the last time she had really talked to him. Her smile turned a little warmer as she came to that realization. "Yeah, I can see that. You look good, Keaton." Her shoulders shrugged again at his return question. "I'm doing pretty good. I finally got out of the diner - though Mikey and Ellie almost killed me for it." She joked.

Keaton nodded, "Yeah I uh, a lot has happened since we last talked," he replied to her. He tilted his head slightly though, taking in the blonde hair and the cut. "For honest though? I'm not saying that it's bad or anything, the blonde looks beautiful, and you are totally not at all me, I just, last time one of us dyed our hair blonde, well to be honest, I was really spiralling then."

When he mentioned it, Rory’s hand flew up to her new hair, resting on the ends of her now short style. A frown grew on her face slightly as he continued talking, only the tiniest bit annoyed that he thought this was her losing her mind. It was fair though, considering their past, so the frown fell away quickly as she nodded. “Thanks, but honest, I’m good. This was all Abel.” She said, as if that explained everything. To her it did. “I’m still getting used to the length but I really like it.” Sheep looked up at her when her hand was away from him for too long, and she smiled down at him before going back to petting, looking back up at Keaton. “I promise this isn’t me spiraling though.”

Keaton nodded, feeling relief that she was really okay. If he was being honest, it was really hard not being there for her and not knowing if she was okay. “Okay, I believe you, I just wanted to make sure,” he replied. “It really does look great, you look great Rory.” He let out a soft sigh, shifting slightly, his hand absentmindedly going to pet the part of Sheep closest to him. Sheep looked at him and rolled over so that he was in between the two, in order to get pet by both of them. “I’m uh, really glad you and Abel are getting along again. Honest truth, promise.”

"Thank you, I honestly feel great." Keaton sliding closer made Rory's body freeze for a second, though she wasn't sure why. Instead of trying to figure it out, she focused back on Sheep, letting out a little laugh at his attempts to reach the both of them at once, giving him a small boop on the nose as Keaton spoke. The responding smile was small, almost guilty looking at the mention of Abel. She had a lost of remorse for everything that happened the night of their argument, especially for everything they both said about both Sean and Abel. "Thanks, it's...crazy how familiar it is, yet totally different. If that even makes any sense." She let out a small sigh, feeling the words bubbling under her skin and barely fought to keep them back. "Look, I know I said it a million times before, but I am really sorry. For everything."

“Rory, you,” Keaton started. He wanted to say that she had nothing to be sorry for, but the thought of her bringing up Sean in their fight, it hurt him. “It’s okay now,” he said truthfully. “You don’t need to keep apologizing to me about it. We both said things we weren’t exactly proud of. I know you’re sorry, it’s truly okay. I should really be apologizing to you.”

Rory shook her head, sitting up straighter. "No, stop just-" She let out a huff, trying to get her head in the right order. "Just let me say this. I'm not just sorry for the fight - though that's a major part of it, I was a fucking bitch. But, I'm sorry for everything since I got back from that quest. I was barely a person, let alone a halfway decent girlfriend." Her eyes moved away from him, focusing back on the dog as the words continued to spill out of her. "I was so determined to pretend that I was okay, so that people wouldn't worry about me, but I was a fucking wreck inside, and I know that you saw that, but I still just...kept it from you, I don't know." Her eyes now tilted up, willing away the shine that was now over her eyes. "I guess I'm just sorry that I put you through all of that."

Keaton sighed slightly. “Rory, you put me through that for like two months. I put you through that for five years,” he said. “You do not have to apologize for losing it. Everyone loses it eventually, it’s just a matter of when.” Keaton looked away from her for a moment, working up the courage to speak about what was on his mind. “I think I got so protective because I knew you were hurting and there was nothing I could do to help you because I couldn’t even help myself. I didn’t know what to do. You were the one who was always strong for me, and when I needed to be that person for you, I didn’t know how to be? I shouldn’t have pushed you so hard when I knew you weren’t ready. When I saw you go through this, I was scared honestly, I was scared that you were going to ignore it for so long and end up like I did. I want that for no one, especially not for you.”

Keaton shifted. “I don’t, I don’t know if Mikey told you, but over the summer when I left camp, I uh, had myself committed to this mental health facility. I’m not ashamed of that, really.” Keaton looked at her again. “I learned a lot this about coping and myself... and our past.” He sighed slightly. “What I’m trying to say is, you deserve a break for it, because losing it and putting me through it, it’s not weakness and it’s not bad, it’s just life. It sucks and it’s messy, but no one can even blame you for that. I admit, it definitely could’ve been handled a lot better on both our parts, but what matters is that you’re not losing it anymore.”

Rory wanted to speak up and defend him against himself, but the words wouldn't come out. Cause honestly? She couldn't fight the truth in them. She wasn't sure what she needed when she in the thick of her mental issues and breakdown, but everything that Keaton did to help only made her feel more overwhelmed. So she just stayed silent, letting him rant just as he did for her, looking back down at the dog in her lap when he talked about not wanting her to end up like him. She hated that found herself agreeing to it.

As he continued, her head flashed back up, eyes furrowed in confusion at the mentioning of a health facility. "No...Mikey didn't say anything to me." Probably because she spent a chunk of time not talking to Mikey much at all, but that wasn't the point. Acting on instinct, she reached around the german, resting her hand lightly on top of his. "I'm proud of you, though. A few years ago I never thought I'd be hearing you say this. That took a lot of strength, Keat. Everything's still a bit messy, but we're working on it, on ourselves, so I think it's steps in the right direction."

Keaton nodded in agreement with Rory. "I really am sorry for how I tried to go about everything, you deserved so much more than that, and I really understand and see that now. I'm sorry I didn't really get it before," he told her. Silence fell between the two for a moment, Keaton looked at her hand on his. He wanted to move his, but he honestly missed it. Though, he wasn't going to think too much of it.

"Would we just be able to start over? I mean, we wouldn't erase the years between us, obviously. Honestly, I don't think we could. More of like, start new? We've changed a lot over the last year, so it's not like we can just start from where we left off." Keaton looked at her again. "I would really like if we could start as friends again, honestly I've really missed being able to talk to my best friend. Without all the war, and the pain, and everything. Like actually be friends. That's if you're comfortable with that. If you're not, that's totally okay too, I'll understand if you're not."

A small, sad smile appeared on her face. "I think we both did. I'm sorry too." As the silence dragged on, Rory pulled her hand away, moving it to brush some hair out of her hair before returning it to lay gently against Sheep. She turned her head to look out at the lake, feeling a breeze of calm wash over her despite the conversation currently happening.

Keaton's next words cause a smile to grow on her face, not a full one, but it was a smile none the less. She thought back on their friendship before the war, at how happy they were and how well they fit together as friends. She did find herself missing that version of them, or at least the idea of those two people. "Yeah, I think i'd like that. It won't be easy, though I think both of us already knew that." She turned her head to look back at Keaton. "But I'm definitely willing to try."

Keaton nodded. "I think we both recognize that we need like just to be friends for a while, so it's worth a shot. I'm told I need to be a kid for once, rather than feeling like I need to take everything on," he shrugged as if it was like no big deal, but it was really something he struggled with, is struggling with. "If you're down, it would be really cool to do some things that we've never done as friends, like stupid teenager shit."

Nodding along to his words, Rory couldn't help but smiling a little bit as she joked. "You definitely do, I was always the more childish one between us." Loosening up would do wonders for Keaton, she had always thought that, and was glad to hear the same idea come from his own mouth this time around. "Yeah, sure thing. Just uh, you can text me whenever you have an idea."

Keaton nodded at Rory in response, a smile growing on his own face. "Will do."

#d:keaton #discord #d:keatonrory #keaton #keatonrory

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