#cause that’s what they and the fans want right?

[summerssover]

𝐒𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐒𝐞𝐱 ⊹ ִֶָ ❲ 𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘥𝘰𝘮!𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 ❳

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘, in which you and chris make soft porn in the bathtub

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆, sub!reader x softdom!chris, blackfem!influencer

𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒, SMUT!, super fluffy, riding, creampie, praise kink, filming, fingering, p in v

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓, 2.1k

𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙧 𝙮𝙖𝙥𝙥 𝙨𝙚𝙨𝙝!

hey loves i’m back for the summer, this was so cute to me make sure to show it some love and let me know if you want to be on the taglist <3

▐ 𝐈’𝐋𝐋 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐌𝐈𝐋’ 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐇𝐄𝐑

𓏲 🥭🐚 𓂃 ✦ 🌺

“what time am i supposed to be picking you up?”

“uh, i don’t know maybe tomorrow”

“kay, don’t forget to wrap it up kid”

“get outta’ here matt..”

chris chuckled as matt drove off, leaving him to walk to his girlfriend’s porch. you had texted him earlier about it being a content day and needing help with filming, obviously he was quick to accept the offer considering your line of work; you were an only fans influencer. you’d upload videos of yourself masterbating and a couple streams here and there, but your content mostly consisted of clips from you and chris; it was what got you the most views after all.

chris pulled his key out of the door before locking it back and walking into the dim and spotless family room.

“babe!”

he announced himself in the house but got no answer. walking around the living room and the kitchen, chris called for your name again and still no answer so he progressed to the stairs. the closer he got to the second story, the more he could hear faint whimpering coming from the bedroom.

he soon opens the door to reveal you, completely naked, hovering over the bed with knees staked into the mattress and a pillow under your pulsating cunt. chris lets out a breath he didn’t even notice he was holding as he watched you glide your needy pussy along the pink satin pillowcase.

going at it for quite some time now you begin to build up your climax and throw your head back at the sensation you were getting. the feeling didn’t nearly match how your man would put it on you but it would do for now. suddenly you could feel the presence of another, head still dangling upward and overdramatized moans filling the room. the warmth got closer causing your eyes to shoot open and an upside-down chris gazing at the water-like movement of your ass with a cheshire cat smile.

“m’ baby, how long have you been standing here?” you tossed your legs to the side of the bed and went to stop the video before catering to your flustered boyfriend, showering his face and neck with tiny kisses.

chris allowed his ice cold hands to scoop you up before roaming freely around the plush of your skin, soaking up all your love and tenderness. “i wanna’ to be greeted just like that from now on, every time i step foot in this house i better see some ass.”

you brushed chris’ childish joke off and wrapped your arms around his neck. “no seriously, how much were you in? you know i’ll have to cut it out.”

“quite whining ma, we’re gonna’ get you some even better shit today right?” you cracked a smile at chris as he slyly smirked back at you. he was lucky you didn’t get to your orgasm in that clip or you might’ve actually been mad, but for now you’d let his puppy eyes win.

“let me see how wet you are baby.” he said under his breath and with no hesitation reached between your legs to pick at the soak string of fabric buried inside your pussy then stuffing two fingers in.

“ugh—” chris pulled his fingers out of you just as fast as he put them in and shoved them in your mouth, cutting off your whines and forcing you to suck up the slick. his index and middle finger rested in your mouth as you swirl your tongue around them, thoroughly getting a taste of your juices.

chris’ pants went extremely tight and he poked his cheek with his tongue and a smirk playing on his lips, absolutely loving how freaky you’d get in filming mode, it turned him on embarrassingly fast.

pulling his fingers from your mouth and making his way to your bed he asked “how was your day mama, you eat good?”

chris investigated his girl, now laying belly up on your bed with you following, laying arched over his crotch area.

“my day was fine, i did a little shopping earlier, not gone lie i haven’t ate in a minute though”

“you wanna’ get some food after we’re done?” you nod while chris takes your head in his hands to connect his lips to your forehead.

“and how was yours, my love?” you melted into his body as he pulled you closer.

“fucking boring, matt peer pressured me into cleaning with him. i was thinking about you all day though.”

your heart melted at his words and chris softly rubbed the small of your exposed back, occasionally touching your dermal piercings while the two of you conversatated above a faint whisper until you noticed the time was whining down.

snuggling deeper into chris’ neck you lightly groaned. “i don’t wanna’ move”

“fucked yourself out huh?” chris silently snickered at the way you clung your body to his, knowing well enough that you were tired from how clingy your actions were. he ran his fingers along the spinal groove of your back and whispered into your ear. “laying around s’ not gonna’ pay you anything”. a tingle played on your cheeks and core at the rasp of his lowered voice. choosing to ignore it you only responded with yet another groan.

“i’ll tell you what, let me do all the work and you sit there n’ look pretty” chris offered out of generosity and partially for his own enjoyment. your face lit up

in a split second and you brought your head to look at his. “you want to be in a video?” you exclaimed with a toothy grin, normally he was the one recording here.

“i mean i don’t really consider myself porn star material but i’m cool with the neck-down”

you squealed with excitement. you’ve always respected your boyfriend's wishes in regards to keeping him off of your platform, obviously your audiences didn’t mix, but deep down you’ve always wanted chris to fully be in one of your amateur films, knowing it would do numbers and make tons of money.

“here lemme’ make you a bath” chris gently scooted you off his lap, dragging your damp cunt across his clothed leg in the process, making your breath to hitch. you watched from the bed as he made his way into your connected bathroom and slipped his shirt off before turning the faucet to warm then pouring some lavender body wash in the tub. his sweats followed after, hitting the ground allowing his dick to spring up and collide with his lower abdomen.

leaving the soap and water to fill the bath and backtracking to you, he began to take the remainder of your clothing off and took one of your hair bows that resided on his wrist to pull your fresh blow out into a ponytail.

once the pair stood in front of the half empty bathtub chris was the first to sit in the lukewarm water then pulling you in to straddle his waist. your phone had been propped up on the bottle of soap he used to fill the water, giving the audience a perfect view of both your bottom halves and the overhead lights were set to dim.

“you ready ma?” he whispered ever so gently, making sure the camera wouldn’t pick up his voice even though it was a known fact that chris was in a relationship with a cam girl. you nodded your head in response, giving him the green light to touch you the way he’d been wanting to. leaning his back on the wall of the tub chris lifted your ass to the air and began to run his rugged fingers through the maze that is the folds of your pussy. he peeked over your shoulder and gazed into the phone screen to get a glance at your glistening heat as he felt you clenching around him, encouraging him to rub a little harder. you softly moaned in his ear and laid your head on his shoulder as he did his thing.

taking the pad of his thumb to your clit he circled it around while his hand that held you up traveled to your ass also applying slow strokes before sending it a sting.

“ugh chr—” chris cut off your whimpers, smashing his pillowy lips into yours before you could disclose his name. your back arched and chris removed his thumb leaving space for your puffy bud to press against his stiffened shaft. chris proceeded to bury two fingers in knuckles deep in your needy hole, plunging and curling inside you. as if it was a reflex you rhythmically grinded on chris’ cock earning a growl from his pouting lips and breaking the long winded make out. the couple took this time as a breather before chris connected your lips once more and returned to sending rapid strokes to your sweet spot. you lifted off of his fingers a bit with a scrunched face and a wide mouth, echoing shrieks bouncing off the walls. your nails dug intensely into chris’ red flesh as your juices began to trickle down his fingers and dripped into the water.

as you basked in your high chris pulled forth his bricked cock to replace his cum covered fingers, granting himself a taste prior to forcing them into your mouth for you to suck the excess off.

“good fucking girl” chris grunted through his teeth while he tried to not cream at the sexy sight in front of him. your head tilted up as chris slowly pulled out of your mouth and sank you down to rest on his dick, giving you a moment to adjust to his size and squeeze against every inch of girth he had to offer. both of you panted as you tightly hugged each other's bodies and chris littered passionate kisses along your neck and shoulders, the hickies left behind going unnoticed by you. you rolled your hip, stretching yourself around him even more as chris’ lips traveled to peaks of your breast while a free hand messaged the other.

his cock throbbed desperately need to be in your gut and he released pathetic whimpers at your teasing antics. it was only a matter of time before he could feel pre cum seeping from his tip and tensions building up before having to handle you himself. rough hands roped and squeezed at your ass, guiding you to bounce up and down on his dick causing your head to fly back and growls and moans to escape your mouths.

“f-fuck feels so good, baby” your praises came out choked and choppy by the way chris pounded you at a now rapid pace and hummed in response. he was mesmerizing at your boobs that moved freely in his face, sparkling beautifully from the water and saliva that coated them. at this point his groans were just as loud as yours and his eyes were rolled to the back of his head. you screamed out and grabbed the shaggy, damp hair on the back of chris’ head while the camera captured prominent white rings forming around the base of his dick. the coil in your belly sprung a euphoric sensation throughout your whole body before you stood on your knees and chris’ dick slipping out of you with a pop of the head. globs of milky essence came gushing along the sides of his dick colliding with his spewing out the tip and painting your messy walls white.

you collapsed your upper body on chris’ chest and drool slid down the corner of your mouth. and chris whispered sweet nothings in your ear until you both finally got a hold of your breathing. chris lifts your head from his chest, brush bits of hair from your face that once was straightened but now texturized due to the humidity of the bathroom. “you still with me, mama?” he chuckled, half of him joking and the other half making sure you didn’t actually black out, it was hot as fuck in that bathroom.

your eyes fluttered open and a soft grin rose on your lips.

“you deserve a metal or some shit, that was too good”

chris just shook his head and smiled then wiped the drool from your chin before releasing you to retrieve your phone. crawling back to your spot between chris’ legs you played around on the camera making funny faces and posing while chris kissed all over the red and purple bruises along your skin.

“y’all my boyfriends dick is magical, comment down below if you want to be next” you squished his cheeks together making his face turn flushed.

“okay” he spoke flusteredly, dismissing the nonsense that left your mouth and ending the recording. “c’mon i wanna’ take a shower now”

so much for hiding his identity.

𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩!- @worldlxvlys @ariieeesworld d @muwapsturniolo @esioleren @sturn59 @junnniiieee07 @iluvmattyb @kriissy4gov @patscorner @imsosillygoofylol @sturncakez @sturnzsblog @mattslolita

#˖ ࣪ 🥭⋆˚࿔ 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐒𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x black reader #chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #nathan doe x reader #black writers #matt sturniolo x black reader #chris sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo imagine #x black reader #SoundCloud

[charrlote365]

The Fox's Roulette.

Reference Idol: fromis_9 LEE SAEROM Word Count: 15.798 Tags: Romance, pits, Kpop idol, fromis_9, Lee Saerom

PART 1 The neon lights from street flickered through the window, casting a yellow ray across the polished counter of my bar(PIC 1). The bar has already closed but I was not quite finish working yet, because tonight, my regular customer, also a close friend was visiting. Fate indeed works in a mysterious way, I never thought owning and working in a bar would give me a chance to have a KPOP idol as a friend. Saerom, the leader of fromis_9(PIC2), honored my humble establishment as her first choice to have her favorite activity: Drinking.

Saerom and I had formed a friendship over the years. Despite her celebrity status, she found happiness and comfort in my small bar, away from the spotlight world. I knew her even before we were friends, because after all, I was also a Flover, and you don't have to guess who is my ult bias. It's her. Thankfully she didn't know about this, so we can have a comfortable chit chats. I always know that she was a shy soul, despite of her sharp glares on performances.

As the late night seeping through, the empty glasses were pilling up, yet Saerom's laughter filled the air. She looked happier than usual(PIC3), her cheeks flushed with the warmth of the alcohol. I watched her with a mixture of amusement and concern, knowing she had drunk a bit too much than usual.

"Hey, Saerom," I said, leaning against the counter. "You've had quite a few tonight. Maybe it's time to call it a night?"

Saerom pouted, raising a glass filled with beer high up, her gaze unfocused(PIC4). "But I don't wanna go home yet. I drove here by myself, so I can't drive back home now. You don't want anything bad happen to me, your biggest spender, do you?? bad bad bartender.. hehe..hiccups. Hey, can't I just stay here with you?"

PART 2 I can't believe what I just heard. "What did she just say?!!", I shouted loud in my heart. I hesitated, torn between my duty as a caring friend and the unspoken rules of propriety both as a fan and decent human being. But it seems the devil has won this time, I just can't let go this chance, to spend the night together with my most beloved person on earth, Lee, Saerom.

"Yeah, yeah, alright," I relented with a smile. "You can stay, but only if you promise not to cause too much trouble."

Saerom grinned, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "I promise."

As the night deepen, Saerom and I settled into our usual spot by the tinted window. The conversation flowed effortlessly between us, filled by laughter and personal stories.

"Hey," she said hesitantly, her voice was swaying around. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course," I replied, trying to guess why the sudden change of mood.

Saerom hesitated for a moment, her gaze fixed on the swirling liquid in her glass as if searching for the right words. "Are you… a fan of our group?"

Panic gripped me as I struggled with the secret I kept. I wondered why she asked that so suddenly. But with a deep breath, I looked her in the eye and confessed, letting honesty flow from within.

"Yes," I admitted, the word slipping out before I could stop it. "I am."

Saerom's eyes widened in surprise. "Really? I had no idea."

"Well, I'm glad that you do. At least I know you like us as a KPOP group, I think we're not doing that bad afterall", she said with a giggle yet with a slight hint of sadness.

"So! Next question! Who do you like the most in fromis?" Saerom asked, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.

I felt my heart skip a beat, panic rising in my chest. I hadn't expected her to ask that now, and now my secret admiration for her was on the brink of being exposed. I searched for words, trying to think what answer should I give.

"Well, um…" I stammered, rubbing the back of my neck nervously. "Honestly, it's you."

Saerom's eyes widened in surprise, and for a moment, I feared I had crossed a line. But then, a warm smile spread across her face, and she leaned in closer, she put her hand on mine.

"Really? You don't need to lie to me" she asked softly, her voice filled with genuine excitement.

I nodded quickly, feeling the tension ease. "Yeah, I swear. I'm dead serious."

"What about me? Why am I your favorite?" she asked while closing her eyes with a gentle smile on her face, waiting for me to spill all her good qualities.

"It's how you're so talented and dedicated, yet still so humble. You have incredible stage presence, but you're also kind and down-to-earth. And then your smile always lights up the room and makes everyone around you feel special. You have this way of making people feel seen and appreciated. That's what makes you my favorite, and also to be honest, I really like your visual"

Saerom's eyes softened, and she squeezed my hand gently. "Aww you're making me shy now but thank you," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "That means a lot to me."

"Hey," she began, a playful smile tugging at her lips. "I have an idea. Wait here."

Before I could ask what she meant, she stood up from her chair and disappeared into the back room where she'd left her bag. A few moments later, she returned, holding a neatly folded outfit.

"I brought my idol outfit from last performance," she explained, her cheeks tinged with a faint blush. "I thought… maybe I could change into it. As a thank you. For being such a great friend and fan."

I blinked, taken aback by her unexpected offer. "Are you sure? You don't have to do that."

Saerom nodded, her smile widening. "I want to. Just give me a minute."

With that, she went into the restroom, leaving me to process the surreal turn of events. My heart raced with anticipation as I imagined her in the dazzling outfit I'd only seen if I went to the stage.

PART 3 A few minutes later, the door creaked open, and Saerom stepped out. She was a vision in her idol attire, the sparkling white dress catching the light and casting a radiant glow around her. She struck a playful pose, clearly enjoying the moment(VID 1).

"So," she said, twirling her body slightly, "what do you think?"

I was frozen. She always look amazing, but able to see her up close in her idol mode hit different. "You look amazing," I finally managed to say something, my voice filled with admiration. "Thank you, Saerom, This means a lot for me."

"I'm glad you like it," she said softly. "I had wanted to do something special for you anyways". "Btw, I feel a lil bit bored, let’s play a game,” she suggested, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “Roulette. But with cards. We’ll guess if it’s black or red. Whoever wins gets to ask the loser to do a truth or dare.”

I raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “A little risky, don’t you think?”

She giggled, “That’s the fun part! Besides, you can’t back out now. your beloved Saerom has challenged you! hehe”

I couldn’t resist her playful challenge. I Grabbed a deck of cards from behind the bar, I shuffled them thoroughly and folded one card in half, placing it in front of us. Saerom watched with focus, although I knew she was absolutely drunk like a drunk overworked old man.

“Ladies first,” I said, gesturing to the card.

“Red,” she declared confidently.

I unfolded the card—black. She groaned dramatically, throwing her head back. “Alright, bartender. Truth or dare?”

“Dare,” I replied, not wanting to waste my chance.

She leaned closer, her alcohol reeked warm breath against my nose. “so my Master, what is you first command?", she said jokingly.

PART 4 I chuckled, while thinking. "May I take pictures of you tonight?". She slightly tilted her head back, "Is that all? I don't have to do anything?". "Yes, that's enough for now", I answered while taking my first picture of her on that night (PIC 5). She looked very gorgeous, her eyes are beautiful, and I couldn't believe it that I was the only person her eyes are looking at for the whole night.

We continued the game. This time my turn. “Black.”

Saerom’s eyes twinkled as she unfolded the card—red. She clapped her hands in delight. “Yes! Truth or dare?”

“Dare,” I said, feeling a bit excited.

Her eyes scanned the empty bar, almost like checking if we're really alone, then returned to me with a sudden foxy smile. “I dare you..to show me your kinks through action, you can't back down now! haha!”

I was frozen. "A-are you crazy? I think you drank too much". "No..I'm not joking..", she replied. I looked deep into her eyes trying to confirm her decision, and it seemed she's excited about it. With that, I then asked her to raise her arms, exposing her milky, foldy pits that I love so much(PIC 6). Feeling a bit shy, I closed my eyes then moved my head closer to her pits, the scent of her perfume mixed with her sweat becoming more pronounced. They smelled sweet, almost flowerily. She tilted her arms back slightly, giving me better access, and my heart raced as I put my nose right on her pits and breathed in the delicate smell from her. I lost myself from her scent that I kissed her pits and licked them. She giggled slightly from the tickle yet didn't say anything. I kept continuing kissing and licking her pits, savoring the slightly salty, sweet and sour taste of her foldy pits meat and fat. The scent, the warmth of her pits filling my tongue, emitting an intimate taste that made my heart beats faster. Her hair brushed against my cheek, and I could feel the slight rise and fall of her breath. The world outside the bar seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of us in this moment.

PART 5 Regaining my consciousness, I realized I had gone too far. "I-I'm, sorry! I think I got carried away!"

She smiled shyly , her eyes were like she's in absolute intoxication, her breath was uncontrollable from what I just did to her, “It's okay, that was fun, I kinda enjoyed it”, she said with a giggle, her voice was gentle.

Alright, Round three. Saerom guessed red again, and this time she got it wrong again. She didn’t hesitate. “Truth or dare?”, I asked.

“Dare,” she said, feeling bold after what just happened.

She leaned in, her voice barely above a whisper. “So what do you want me to do?”, while looking sweetly to me.

I paused, considering. I must have gone crazy that time, because my very next request, was asking her to take off her clothes.

Saerom raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised. She hesitated for a moment, then smiled, accepting the challenge. She held up her hands and began to slowly taking off her white dress, one finger at a time, clamping down her dress hook, then her bra, and lastly, her nipple pads. Her movements were deliberate and almost mesmerizing. I have never seen a woman undressing in front of me, let alone someone that I adore very much. Flovers keep calling her fox, but what I see she's more like a swan, every gestures she made was so satisfying to see, she almost like a ballerina, gentle and grand.

Her nipple pads came off, revealing her breast. I have never been so intimate to anyone in my life, yet right now I finally able to get into the hidden part of her personal world. I couldn’t take my eyes off her as she neatly folded the dress and bras and set them aside.

“There,” she said, her eyes twinkling with a mix of challenge and shyness. “I'm nude now. Happy?” (PIC 7)

“Very much,” I replied, my heart beating faster, I couldn't even blink, my eyes are locked onto her breasts. There was something about seeing her like this, more relaxed and natural, that made the moment even more special. I gulped, while holding myself from doing anything stupid.

Round four. I guessed black, and won. “Truth or dare?”

“Dare,” I said, my confidence somehow went unwavering.

I grinned, leaning closer to her. “Now, I dare you to make me as your lover tonight”.

PART 6 Without missing a beat, Saerom stood up, with bare naked body. Without a single word, she came to me and sat on my lap, facing me so closely. She kissed my lips, we ate each other lips and tongue like its a alcohol laced lollipop, it was sweet, sticky, intoxicating and I couldn't get enough of it. I was overwhelmed with all the feelings. Love, Lust and sense of loyalty filled my head all at once. She let out a little moan as I started to kiss her neck. I teased her by gently groped her breasts. she let out a little groan again, only turning me on more. I slowly started to kiss her down her chest, on her tits, sucking on her nipples. I kissed down to her tummy, while gripping hard on her thighs, then removed her underpants. I carried her on my shoulder like she was a doll. Her bare skin pressed against my chest and shoulder, they were so soft yet tender. Her body is truly the epitome of health. I laid her down on a sofa I had in the bar and I spread her legs out for me. I could see her bare pussy, open wide for me, they're perfectly shaved, with small labia and slightly pinkish. Some transparent liquid was oozing out from the precious hole, they looked almost like its begging me start stick in something into it.

I licked all the love juice that was oozing out, swallowed it, and gently bit her clit as she let out another moan. She was too perfect, too much of a goddess. she deserved the best this world could offer. My feelings to her has grown from a friend, to a fan and now the only thing I want in the world is to spend the rest of my life with her. I love her, I love her so much I could die at any moment. She started to moan louder as I licked and sucked hard. I put my fingers in her entrance and started pumping my 2 fingers into her at the same time. I curled up my fingers, making sure to hit her g-spot every time. I thrusted hard while my other hand rubbing her clit fast. I sucked her breast again, making sure all her sensitive parts are teased. Her breath hitched and she started to moan louder and finally her body convulsed wildly as she finally came. that's all I needed to know i was doing a good job. I used my hand to hold on to her hips and arched her body forward, so that we're now facing each other very closely.

PART 7 Her eyes met mine, we exchanged our breath from very close proximity and for a moment, the world seemed to pause. We then shared a kiss, turning all of our emotions into physical contact. Now that she knows I love her pits, I asked her if I could rub my dick onto her pits. She was shyly hesitant at first but she could not refuse it. She then sat on the floor raising her hands up while I stick my dick's tip on her pit fold and started rubbing it all over her pits(PIC8). I could feel the texture and the warmth from her lymph node, her pits actually enclaved deep enough to enclose my whole dick's tip. Fckkk suddenly I felt was going to come but I managed to hold it. I then moved to her back and asked her to squeeze my dick with her pits and inner arms like a sandwich. I knew she does workout regularly and that explained why her arms felt tight like a pussy. I rubbed my dick into her pits slits faster and faster, her sweat and my pre-cum made her pits extra wet and slimy as she clamped down even tighter and let out a moan "emmwahh", her moan was so cute that I finally couldn't hold it, "Ahh!! Saerom ahh!!" I spurted out my cement all over her pits and breast. My heart beat so fast that it could stop any moment and I was so lightheaded I thought I would faint, I have never felt so weak yet completed and happy in my life.

After that, she borrowed my bathroom to take a shower, while I cleaned up the mess we made on the bar's floor. When she was finished, she came out still fully naked, sitting on the bar's chair asking for a glass of scotch. "Really? more drinks??" I was baffled. "Of course! Drinking is number one!" with a smirk on her face(PIC 9). Looking at her breasts suddenly made my dick standing hard rock again, and it was clearly visible to her. Suddenly, she smiled naughtily and whispered, "Hey, wanna go another roulette round after this?" -End

#kpop #kpop smut #kpop girls #kpop gg #male reader #fromis 9 smut #fromis 9 #lee saerom #saerom

[reiderwriter]

Satisfaction Feels Like a Distant Memory

Chapter Three of I Can't Help Myself

Summary: Your mounting attraction to Spencer Reid pushes you to the edge, turning begrudging friendship to deep hatred when he finally shows up on your doorstep. He's the only thing that can out you out of your misery even as you sink further into it.

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, hate sex, rough sex, argument as foreplay, oral (f recieving) and face fucking, fingering, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, forced orgasms, "forced" submission, creampie, p in v penetrative sex, etc.

A/N: I've had about as much sleep as the reader in this fic has for the last week, but HERE IT IS! Chapter Three 🥰 You may need a bottle of water on standby, or at least a hand fan, because this one gets a bit heated....

Masterlist || Add yourself to the taglist!

You hesitated in front of your office door, which you supposed was going to become a bad habit of yours now. You tried lying to yourself, that nothing was different now, that you weren't attracted to him in a completely stupid way, but you still stood frozen in front of your own office door. 

Frozen and horny. 

Shit. 

You mentally went through a list of the worst things that could happen if you went in. 

1. He was there. 

2. He wasn't there. 

3. He was there, and he touched you again, and you moaned. 

4. He was there, and he didn't touch you again, but you still moaned. 

5. He was there, and you threw yourself at him immediately because why wouldn't you when you'd seen what you could be working with the night before? Fuck moaning once, moaning multiple times as he pushed you against the bookshelf would- 

“Are you gonna go in, or are you just going to fondle the door handle?” He asked from behind you. From too close behind you. 

You turned, keeping the doorknob in your grin, and immediately flattened yourself against the door as he took a step closer. 

So close. He was so fucking close and it was suddenly all you could think of. 

“W-What?”

“You know, the CDC warns that door handles should be washed every 20 to 40 hours To prevent bacteria like Escherchia coli and Staphylococcus aureus from-” You ignored his words, drowning everything else out as you tried to dampen the fire burning under your skin.

“Cock?” You said, all attempts obviously not working. 

“Staphylococcus, yes. It can cause Adenovirus, Rhinovirus, not to mention-” 

“Okay! Okay, Spencer. Taking my hand off the handle now.” 

Finally, you twisted it and walked backwards into your room, walking backwards a few steps before your foot caught on a stray pile of books. 

“What the-” you cried, waiting for the impact of your landing as you swung out your arms frantically for purchase, screwing your eyes shut as you found none. 

Instead, you found an arm snaked around your waist, another wrapping your hip tight as Spencer Reid cradled your body to his own. 

“Thanks,” you breathed out, not even hearing the words yourself for how much air was in them. How was it possible to expel air and hold your breath at the same time? Because that was how it felt being in his arms: at once a sigh and a stopping of all bodily functions barring want. 

“I thought this was your office, Y/N. Surely you should know the layout by now.”

Moment over. You pushed at his chest to stand upright, and he stepped backwards, removing his hands from your person. 

“Very funny. We both know these are your books. Setting traps for me now, Spencer?” 

You moved around the piles of books again as he flicked the light switch, moving the opposite way around your desks, before meeting you again next to yours. 

“You're usually more observant than this. Is there something wrong today?” 

“What, like Adenovirus or Rhinovirus?” 

“No, like something…” he searched for the right words, pace slowing as he tried not to scare you away by talking with you like this.

“Like something on your mind.” 

You snorted, leaning down to switch on your computer, and also to avoid his eye contact. Unfortunately, academic curiosity had gotten to you in the last few weeks, and you'd read some of his psychological papers. You knew exactly what it was the BAU was apparently so good at, and you didn't want him to know that you'd imagined him balls deep in you hours before. 

“Not friends, Spencer. If there's something I need to talk about, I'll talk to a friend,” you said, standing straight again and turning to him again. You still avoided eye contact, but it didn't matter. His eyes weren't on your face but angled further down, like he'd been checking out your ass as you bent over or something. 

No. No, you weren't going down that train of thought. 

“Or even better, my therapist.” You were planning on the words being a bit more playful, but your voice came out deeper than you expected it, more gravely somehow. 

Your bedroom voice, you were using your stupid fucking bedroom voice on Spencer Reid. 

You cut yourself off again before you said anything else. Before he touched you or didn't touch you, and you got to test your earlier theory about which would be the more demeaning reaction. 

“I have class in ten. Clean up before I get back,” you ordered, and you felt the hairs on the back of your neck stand up when he replied. 

“I don't take direction well, Y/N.” 

No, you didn't think he would. Neither did you though.

For a week, you tiptoed around the man, your words sharp, but your body weak to him. 

By day, you were hurling insults back and forth, messing up his papers and screwing with him via bookshelf again. 

“YOUR…FLY…IS….OPEN.” 

“VERY….MATURE.”

“MADE…YOU…LOOK…THOUGH.”

“BUSY….LOOKING…AT…OTHER….THINGS.”

“LIKE…THE…UNDERGRADS…THROWING…THEMSELVES…AT…YOU…?”

“LIKE…THE…PROFESSOR…I'M APPARENTLY…DATING” 

“Very fucking funny, Spencer,” you sighed at the last message, throwing the books off the shelf and pilling them up on the floor. 

“Don't even for a second entertain the idea of making that gossip a reality.” 

He grinned at you from behind his desk. 

“Okay.”

“Don't even - don't even think about it,” you said, stepping over his desk and poking at his chest as his smile deepened.

“Heard.” 

“I'm serious, Spencer, don't-” 

“You've thought about it.” You froze in shock at his words, as if your blood wasn't sure whether to run cold or burn hot and fast. 

“What?” You spat the words at him, unable to stop them coming out any other way. 

“You've thought about entertaining the gossip. You've thought about it a lot.” 

You needed to deny him, but he was right. By day, you tried to torment him, but by night, he did torment you. A week of wet dreams, of imagining him taking you over every inch of your office, of sleepless rest and failed orgams, and you could not escape. 

“No,” you said with a whisper, shaking your head and trying again even as your voice cracked from the lie and your body's cry for pleasure, for this man. 

“No, I haven’t- I don't-” You took a deep breath, but you knew it was no good, as his hand grabbed yours and flattened it against his chest. 

“Your pupils are dilated, your pulse is heightened, and your legs are practically clamped shut. Your mouth is dry, and I'm not sure if you've noticed yet, Y/N, but you're shaking.” 

“All signs of anger, Spencer, as you're well aware.” 

He let go of your wrist and sat back in his seat, just out of reach of you again. 

“Shame,” he whispered under his breath, nearly low enough that you didn't catch it, as he flipped open his book and continued whatever the fuck it was he even did in this office. 

You ignored it, anger really flooding you now, warring the heat of arousal that was firmly settled in your body for dominance. 

The anger won out. 

You grabbed books from your desk, files, and papers from the side table by the couch and your laptop from your desk and left the room quickly. 

You slammed the door, and you didn't look back, knowing that if you did, you'd see his winning smirk staring right back at you.

You marched yourself right to the staff administration office and put in for a week of leave. Spencer had one more week of work at the university, and then he would go back to being a regular FBI agent. 

Your paths wouldn't cross because you wouldn't let them cross, not when it meant for certain that you would give in.

You spent the week working to distract yourself from work. You finished books for your next semester courses, highlighting the better articles and essays to use, going through each bibliography to find better sources if they weren't good enough. You wrote more of a research paper you didn't have time to think about with so much going on. You corresponded with students, with TAs, with the other professors who wanted to know where you were. 

Okay, that was a lie. You aired the professors, but you did look out for any inboxes from him. Surprisingly, there were none. 

You spent a week throwing yourself head first into your work, and still, each night, you felt his phantom touch on you. No matter how exhausted, your brain still co jured images of his hands grasping your wrists, pushing them above your head and forcing his cock into you, his lips biting against your skin, the fire of his kisses leaving scars where they trailed down. 

You were running on three hours of sleep per night, sure, but at least you were as far as you could possibly get from the man ruining your life. 

You poured yourself a glass of wine the next Sunday, knowing that when you went back to work the next day, he'd be gone.

You wrapped yourself in blankets and put everything else off for the day, ordering food and eating it and not moving as you worked your way through boxes of pizza. 

It was when you finished your first glass and went to pour yourself another that there was a furious pounding at your door. 

“Y/N, I know you're in there, open the door.” His hand sounded again, and you nearly dropped the glass at the sound of Apencer Reid's voice. 

Your body acted alone, immediately following his directions as you damn near tripped over your own feet to open the door for him. 

Throughout all of your arguments, all of the quips you'd thrown at him, every stupid little thing you'd done to get under his skin, you had not once seen Spencer Reid looking this angry. 

His brow was furrowed uncomfortably, as if it were frozen in place. Gone was his perpetual smirk. 

“Spencer, what the fuck a-” 

“Thoughtless. Careless. Do you even know what you've done?” He snapped at you, stepping into your apartment and closing the door behind himself as he immediately walked into your space and began touching things.

“Stop! Fucking stop it, Spencer!” You said grabbing his arm and pulling him around to face you. He brushed you off quickly and worked his way through papers you'd left on your coffee table. 

“No. You stormed out over a week ago, you blocked my number, you did not answer any of my emails-” 

“I didn't get any emails,” you spit back, pushing yourself between him and your things now, bodies so close they were touching. 

“Then you blocked my email, too. You don't even know what I'm looking for or the damage you could have done, do you?” His hands were on you then, not threateningly, as you'd expect, his anger still burning through him if his shaking voice had anything to say for it. 

His hands stroked up your sides and back down again, smoothing away your need to think. 

“My files. My team sent me a file. It was on the coffee table, and you took it with you when you left. The case is ongoing, and I'm flying out tomorrow, and without some of the classified information in that file, we will be at a disadvantage. Our odds of catching our unsub fall from 83% to 47% without all of the pertinent information.” 

Your breath hitched as he leaned in closer. 

“So yes, I'm going to go through your things, and if you're a good girl, you'll root through with me and help me find it.” 

He stepped away then, and you held your tongue. As much as you hated him, he was right. You knew what he did, you knew who he was and to trust him not to lie to you about his chances without this information. 

“The files on the coffee table are research notes, everything I took from the office is in that case over there,” you said pointing at a bag still where you'd dropped it by the door a week earlier. 

He walked to it and rooted through it quickly before finding the file he obviously needed and letting some of the tension out of his shoulders. 

“You're probably glad to see the back of me, right?” He said, laughing bitterly as he turned back around to you. 

“Obviously not as happy as you are,” you spat back, stepping back over to him. 

“If you ever speak to me that way again,” you started, spitting at him in the most threatening voice you could muster. “It won't be a fucking unsub that ruins your life.” 

“And how are you going to manage that, Y/N?” He said, stepping closer to you until he had you backed up against the wall, trapped in by his bigger frame, using it to his advantage to intimidate. 

“How will you manage to ruin my life,” he said, his voice softer as he finished his sentence, but not by much. “When you shake with just every time I get close?” 

“This is not lust,” you growled the words out, but try as you damn might, you were shaking, vibrating even. 

“Then what is it?” 

“Hatred, dislike, loathing, detestation, abhorrence, fuck Spencer, you can pick up a thesaurus yourself and find out.”

“Yeah. Okay. I'll believe your lies for a second.” He walked away, he was walking away but the fire was ringing in your ears and you needed him to stay fucking put so he could take it all. 

“You're a jackass.”

“Original.” 

“You slammed into my life, expecting me to bend to your will and be at the mercy of your needs, your wants. Your office space, your fucking case files, your job-” 

“None of that was my choice.” 

“And it wasn't mine either, but at least I fucking left you alone. I spent the week in this apartment and left you the fuck alone, and you couldn't even allow me the same.”

His focus was back on you again, but you refused to be backed against a wall this time. 

“What did you say?” 

“You will not let me know peace. I have lost my security, my patience, my fucking sanity with each word you have said, my peace of mind, my sleep, my fucking sanity, Spencer.” Your chest was heaving, touching his with each exhale as he too held his place in front of you. He was so close, you'd practically spat the words directly into his mouth. 

“How is that my fault?” He whispered, voice still dripping with disdain even as his hands again wrapped themselves in your hair, and he tugged your head back, baring your neck to him as he leaned down into you. 

“How do you know that you're not doing the same to me?” 

You refused to answer, though, meeting his eyes for one last second before you grabbed his hair in your hands and yanked him down to your mouth. 

It wasn't so much a kiss as a battle for dominance, each trying to torture a surrender from the other with clashing tongues and teeth. 

You made the first move, but he was obviously expecting it, and he didn't even pause before launching his own attack, finally pushing past your strong defence to walk you back to the sofa you'd abandoned earlier. 

His tongue still lashed against yours as you retreated, refusing to give up your upper hand even as you moaned into his touch. The couch hit the back of your knees, buckling, and you silently cursed your lack of sleep for leaving you so unstable right now. 

No, that wasn't true. It was him. He had left you so unstable, moving between happy and playful to angry and wrathful in the space of a week without you, and you'd been denying yourself the ability to even entertain any of this happening. Now that it was, your body was unprepared, totally at his mercy, as he pushed you to your back and pushed up your skirt. 

“You're already so fucking wet,” he groaned slipping two fingers inside you as you moaned around him, no longer capable of thought. This was the moment, this was when he was going to make you submit to him finally. 

Instead, he dropped to his knees and you gasped as his to guess found your sweet cunt and he began sucking to your clit. 

You were on fire, skin scorched from the inside out, spreading in waves from your pussy to the furthest regions of your body. 

With one hand, he spread your thighs further apart and pushed his entire face further into your cunt, tongue pushing inside right by his fingers, nose pushed right up against your clit as he didn't relent. Every movement was another curse falling from your mouth. 

“Shit, Spencer, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you whimpered, hips rocking back and forth as you tried to fuck his face, begging for more. 

To your surprise, he didn't keep your hips still but let you keep riding his face, riding his fingers as you chased your first orgasm.  

It came quickly, overwhelming you with the impact, jolting through your body like a lightning bolt as he let your hips shake and crash across his tongue. 

When he finally pulled his face away, it was glistening, and he wasted no time shoving his tongue back in your mouth. His message was clear - he may have let you take whatever pleasure you'd wanted with him, but he was still the one in control. 

You trailed kisses along his cheeks, neck, shoulders as he divested himself of clothing, shirt, belt, pants, ripping at yours to free your body as well, until the two of you were only left with underwear and you'd picked up every last drop of your cum left on his skin.

“On your back, now,” he said, and you complied. You spread your legs, and rubbed at your still wet cunt, jolting as he finally lined himself up with your cunt. 

But he didn't push in yet. Instead he wrapped two arms under your knees and pulled you closer, so his cock rested over the top of your stomach, and leaned down, his face hovering inches over your own, holding himself up with a forearm rested just above your head. 

“You see that?” He said, glancing down. “That is how much I am going to fill you. That is how deep I am going to ease into you. That is how far I am going to go to claim you. You can take it like a good girl, right?” 

“Just shut up and put your cock inside me, Spencer.” 

“You're so fucking pushy for a submissive little slut,” he said, smiling finally. 

“I am not a-” you started to protest, but he slid inside of your hot cunt and you lost the ability to focus. 

“Not a what, Y/N? Speak up,” thrusting shallowly as your cunt grabbed him and held tight. 

“I'm not a- SPENCER!” You screamed his name as he pulled out quickly, thrusting into you again with a speed and strength that had you wrapping your arms and legs around him tightly, fighting for him to stay right there deep inside. 

“Not a sub? Y/N, you're whimpering and drooling right now. You're three seconds away from begging for my cock, why the fuck can you not be honest with yourself?” 

“Fuck…you,” you said between moans as he rutted into you like a beast. He wasn't man anymore, bit monster, and he was claiming you inch by disgustingly perfect inch. 

“Let go. Let me take care of you, let me control you. Come on, baby, you know how good it would feel,” he said, before ducking his head and wrapping his tongue around a nipple. 

You screamed his name again, but you still tried to resist. 

“Come on, Y/N. Show me. Cum on my cock.” 

For a brief moment, you'd thought you'd resisted the demand. But then your brain faded, and your nails cut into his back like daggers as your body followed his commands and you came on his cock for a second time that night. 

“Perfect. One more, you can do one more,” he said, kissing your lips and lifting himself back up so he was sitting on his knees as he again picked up the pace. 

You mumbled his name over and over again as he fucked out all of the frustration in your body. Every thing either of you had said or done melted away in the glow of pleasure, your body buzzing from the feeling of him taking ownership of you. 

“One more, Y/N. One more, you need to cum one more time.”

“I can't, I can't I can't I can't, Spencer I can't I really can't,” you said, voice growing pathetically whiny as the tears sprang to your eyes and you choked back a sob. 

“Yes you can, one more. Together, we can do it together,” he said, groaning as you clenched around him.” 

He claimed your mouth again, his hand wrapping around your throat as he cut off your air supply for a second, then two, then three, as your ears buzzed and you finally slipped over the edge again. 

But this time, as promised, you weren't the only one caught in the pain of pleasure. Spencer collapsed on top of you as his dick spurted inside you, holding you close as he unloaded everything he had into you. 

He sat there, warming his cock as he lazily kissed open mouth kisses into every inch of your shoulders, collar bone and chest. Everywhere he could reach without pulling out of you and leaving you there. 

After weeks of no sleep because of him, it was his soft lips that finally enticed you into the hands of the sandman, his weight a comfort as you closed your eyes. 

When you woke in your bed, clean and clothed, he was gone, and so was every sign that he'd ever been there in the first place. 

🔖 @stillhere197 @understandingsunrise @mindfullycriminal @aliteralsemicolon @r-3dlips @alexafromamazon15 @jasf444 @subunitless @thebloomingeagle @lackingoriginalthoughts @empressgraytea @nox-sprite @alondralolll @allspicestones @chiyozai @i_heart_mgg @2hiigh2cry @tiyuel @jiuseoks @readinglatenights @placidus @dreamsarebig @pisceslovrr @waywardgoddess66 @tampon_racecar @kbaby-024 @luvdella @feyresqueen @a1dyn @pleasantwitchgarden @kolasbombaf @lovehadlovelost @kissesforspence @moonchildooh @bubbleebubz @theoraekenslover @melagem02 @calypso-read @ari-aurelia

(Note: There are multiple broken tags above. Please check your account settings and make sure you can be tagged when signing up for the tag list. I'll remove all dead tags after two chapters of broken tags!)

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #mgg #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid smut #criminal minds fandom #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid criminal minds #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader smut #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x self insert #dom spencer reid #sub reader #x reader

[rene-darling]

Listen I saw this fanart and now I had an idea. So like sub!Idol Xiao x dom reader (fem prefered but u can choose) and so basically Xiao's taking some mirror selfies for his social media in this outfit and yk like showing off those lacy panties (like they're pulled up, but he still has his jeans on) and like reader (their partnwrcomes home and sees him doing that. So they like sneak up behind him and hug him from behind. Like he becomes all flustered all of the sudden and readers like:"Oh so you're showing this to millions of people, but get embarassed when I see it?" What happens afterwards is up to u lmao

IDOL!- Xiao x reader

OML THIS IS SO- HOT. I love this concept. I'm drooling.

Possessive reader! A lil toxic I guess, but it's pretty tame.

Also! The readers gender nor pronouns are not mentioned anywhere, so feel free to assume. And if they are please feel free to tell me!

Talk to me on insta [r3xni3]😞🙏

...Xiao...

He's been at it for hours. Different angles, different poses- all to get a good photo of himself flaunting his panties and the tight straps attached to them on his waist,

They hug his body so tightly pushing at his skin, if they move even a little bit you'd definitely see the red marks under them, they push up against his skin, it hurts but, he's doing it cause his agency asked him.

"mhm..." Groans leaving his throat, the photos- they're just not good enough. Scrolling through the endless amounts of them that he took, finally landing on one that pleases him.

He decides to shoot it one more time, same angle and stuff, just better lighting. He wants to show off his toned body as much as possible. And as he does this, it- quite frankly skips his mind that he has a loving partner returning from work soon. And that soon happens to be around- now.

"Ah-!" His body freezes up. Goosebumps trace along his skin- god your hands are cold. His eyes flash down, seeing as your hands slowly trace down the side of his waist, fidgeting with the straps they came across, grabbing one and pulling it away from his body only to watch in amusement as it snaps back in place once you let go,

He reaches out to grab your hand instinctively, mewling- until you finally reach, and play with the hem of his panties.

"y/n- s-...mh, stop." He tries sounding serious, but he curses at how squeaky and pitched his voice came out.

"hm..? What's the problem darl', you can show off your panties to millions of people, but you're getting embarrassed when I see? Hmpf, I'm one of your fans too y'know?."

"i-its not the same-" he's stammering over his words "y/n- hah..-" slipping your hands in between them, but not quite touching him just yet, simply tracing the sides of his hip "and how so..? I'm your biggest fan, shouldn't I get a reward for that. I deserve more than a picture. Don't'cha think?"

Tracing down the side of his hip, he can feel your eyes peering over his shoulder, watching him. His every movement, his every shudder. And the way his panties start bulging in a specific area

"y/n-" his voice is cut off by his own whine. You're so mean, suddenly jerking his cock, tapping its tip just for your own amusement. "Aw- darlin that was too cute!..do that again? Hm? For me?..you take so many photos for those stupid fans of yours, you can make that cute sound for me again can't you..?"

Huffing, he's leaning back into your body. His head falling back with each increase in movement, resting it on your shoulder, whining back into your ear. "Hah- you- you're so mean..!"

It's not your fault he's decided to make you jealous. Seriously, why the hell should he post his body for all his perverted fans to see.

Picking up his phone and pressing record on it, angling it right at his face. "Look here baby, I'm sure your perverted fans would love to see their favorite lil idol losing his head over a few touches." His eyes widen in shock "n-no..!"

He tries grabbing the phone, but to no avail. You pull it further, and jerk his lil dick harder, he stumbles, falling forward before you grab his waist pulling him back into you, he's leaning his whole body weight against you, he just hopes you won't let go.

Snickering to yourself you decide to stop recording, and go into the photos, clicking on the video you just took, you bring it to his ears and make him listen "Aw- darling don't you just sound so cute when you're desperate."

That's when it all spills. A shameful feeling, and an ever more shame worthy whine leave him as he comes all in his lacy little panties, getting them all dirty.

His legs collapse completely as you're forced to pick him up off the floor, not that you mind.

Resting him on the bed, letting him catch his breath, you take a hold of his phone and- delete every photo he took showing off those panties.

Scoffing you throw his phone down next to him and crash onto the bed right near him, wrapping your hands around his pretty waist you hear him huff. "You got them dirty..." He could only mumble under his breath.

"I'll buy you some new ones, on one condition." Turning his head around with a slightly amused expression on his breathless face "and..that is...?"

"you can only take those photos for me. I get to see them. No one else."

#genshin x reader #genshin impact #genshin imagines #genshin hcs #sub genshin #genshin xiao #sub genshin men #xiao x reader #xiao fluff #xiao smut #bottom xiao #genshin smut #genshin impact xiao #genshin #genshin x reader smut #sub char #sub xiao #dom reader #top reader #gn reader #female reader #male reader #idol au #xiao #alatus x reader #alatus

[starsofang]

Change of Heart

hitman!simon x f!reader / part 7

previous part

tw: NSFW, MDNI, don't wanna spoil but just be aware!

When life has completely and utterly failed you, you hire a hitman to take you out, too afraid to do it yourself. Instead of killing you like you had planned, he strikes up a deal with you, and you're too stubborn to bail out.

Good things don’t last. And both you and Simon were about to have a cruel reminder.

Simon stuck around after the two of you had shared the intimacy of a kiss. He didn’t let it go farther than just that, and neither did you. In fact, the rest of his time spent cooped up in your apartment was rather quiet and calming, despite the events that had taken place.

There was still fresh blood on his hands. He had let Ghost take over his senses and consume him in a blind rage, only to return to you as Simon, rage simmering into a flutter of calm. 

Simon felt like he was lying to you. And truthfully, part of him was. You didn’t know about the realness of his job or what he did. You didn’t see the knives he embedded in unexpecting men and women, or the droplets of powdered poison slipped into their glasses at parties. You were blissfully unaware of the true nature of his being.

Simon couldn’t exist without Ghost, but Ghost could certainly thrive without Simon.

Ghost could also live without you. No – he’d have to live without you, at some point. Simon just didn’t want to.

He was being selfish and he knew it. He was taking advantage of a woman who had no business being involved with him, yet his heart was unable to let you go and finish the job, the job he’s always been destined to do until death did he part.

Simon had been lying to you, and now, all of it was crumbling down on him.

Price’s text stared back at him from the brightness of his phone screen. It was like staring into the eyes of death, causing his chest to fill with a sickening tightness that made it hard to breathe.

“We need to talk. You know where to meet me.”

So he left you. He made sure you were fast asleep in the comfort of your bed, sheets pulled up to your ears, and he selfishly allowed himself a minute to stare down at your snoozing figure. So peaceful, you were, eyes fluttered shut, eyelashes fanning beautifully across the tops of your cheeks. Your mouth was parted with puffs of air exhaling from your lips, ones he had pressed kiss after kiss against the night before.

Selfish.

The streets were busy as he walked, yet the impending doom that hung over him like a storm cloud muted the sounds and circled him in a bubble. He didn’t hear the chatter of people passing by, nor the cars that revved and honked from the roads beside him.

It was a cruel silence as he went, like his mind was shutting down all aspects of life in a cruel reminder of the ones he’d taken away.

Price resided in a remote apartment complex, one that showed just how much he worked for what he did. Killing people, just like him, but taking on a role on the side of watching over him as well as Gaz and Soap. Brothers they were, all of them, and now Simon feared he was fucking up the dynamic by being greedy.

“Ghost,” Price greeted as he opened the door. Simon gave him a curt nod and entered the residence, following behind Price.

The man in question was silent when he made way to the kitchen, pouring himself a cup of tea. He offered Simon none in return, and Simon knew it was his subtle way of showing disappointment.

“Let’s chat,” Price mused, gesturing with a hand for Simon to join him in the living room.

Simon sat with his fists on his knees, back straight as a board, as Price sat in front of him in a much more relaxed state, leaning back and resting an ankle on his knee. He sipped at the tea, eyes boring into Simon’s.

“You fucked up, Simon.” Straight and blunt, cutting right to the chase. It stuck into Simon like a bee sting. “Killin’ a man outside of a job. Killin’ him of your own free will.”

Graves. The memory of his body, stabbed ruthlessly in his kitchen, his blood puddling the floor in a red mess, staining Simon’s skin an ugly crimson that he spent lifetimes scrubbing off. Mutilated, mangled, completely unrecognizable, all from Ghost’s doing.

“What the fuck were you thinkin’?” Price roared, displaying the layered frustration he had kept abay up until now. “This is your job, Simon, our job. You kill to get paid, not kill for your own pleasure.”

“I know.”

“You know, and still did it.”

“I fucked up.”

“Damn right you fucked up, Simon,” Price sneered. He stared at Simon with a look of anger, before it simmered down to one of muted frustration, a heavy sigh leaving his lips. He pressed his fingers to his eyes, squeezing them shut, before dropping his hand back down. “You need to let her go.”

“Who?” Simon asked, and Price scoffed.

“Don’t be coy. Gaz told me everythin’. Had Soap follow you around when you killed that Graves guy, saw you go back to your little bird’s place. You know who I’m talkin’ about.”

Fuck.

He’d been sloppy, all because of you. Simon never, in all his time of being a hitman, missed the feeling of watching eyes following him around. He never missed the hairs on the back of his neck standing up at the feeling of something or someone watching, observing, never missed the shiver running down his spine in a cold chill.

“This isn’t a fuckin’ game, Simon–”

“I know–”

“--yet you’re playin’ it like it is. This is a civilian’s life we’re talkin’ about, and not only did you kill Graves without payment, but you haven’t clipped your damn bird of her wings like she wants.”

Every single word was a harsh slap to the face, and Simon hated to admit that Price was right. He had rejected the job offer you’d given him from the very beginning. You wanted to die, you wanted to seek safe haven, yet he took that away from you. He wanted to save you, wanted to show you that life had meaning in its own ways, yet where were his reasons to stay?

Simon was a fucking hypocrite. Both to you, and himself.

“You know what you have to do, Simon.”

Simon stared at Price with eyes narrowed in confusion. He studied the firm lines that littered Price’s face, the way his mouth tugged into a frown, nearly covered by his facial hair. The tea he nursed was now growing cold in the presence of his lap, one hand curled around the handle with a white-knuckled grip.

“You can’t possibly ask me to do that,” Simon scoffed.

“I am, and I will. You either let her go and forget she exists, or you kill her off like you were intended to do in the first place. If you can’t handle it, then I’ll have Soap do it. Your choice.”

Price was giving Simon an option, though really, it wasn’t a choice at all. Either way, Simon would lose you, and he’d be forced to toss you aside like worthless garbage, or be forced to see the life drain from your eyes.

He fucked up, big time. He shouldn’t have brought this upon you. How selfish could he be?

Ghost was the person he was destined to be. Ghost was who he truly was. Up until he met you, he was content with that. He was the best of the best, and performed his job like it was a mundane task. Simple. Easy.

You slowed him down. You broke down the walls he’d so carefully built, brick by brick, all because you were a direct clone of who he used to be before he tread down this path of sinful bloodshed. He was an idiot to think he could have you without suffering the repercussions.

You didn’t deserve that, nor did you deserve a man like him – so broken and bruised, his heart too shattered to glue back together, not even by the tenderness of your own hands.

Maybe death really was the best ending for you. But Simon was a greedy bastard and couldn’t allow a world to spin without a piece of you occupying it.

“I’ll let her go,” he finally agreed. His tongue felt as if it were sharp as knives, slicing the gums of his mouth open with every word. Metallic saliva coated his tongue, filling his mouth with vials of blood. “I’ll cut off contact. Erase her number, forget she existed, so long as you don’t lay a hand on her.”

Price stared at him with an unreadable look. It was like he was pondering, examining, trying to crawl his way into Simon’s little mind and take a gander on what he was thinking. It was intrusive, invasive, and Simon looked away.

“She knows too much,” Price replied, tone much softer and sympathetic than before. “None of us want to hurt her, and her bein’ involved will only risk her safety. I’m happy you found somebody, Simon, I am. But you knew what you were gettin’ into. We can’t fraternize with the innocent, or else somebody else will just end up killin’ her instead of us.”

Simon scowled beneath his mask, crossing his arms over his chest in a defense mechanism. He didn’t want to admit that once again, Price was right, and Simon would’ve been the asshole that would’ve eventually gotten you killed or hurt.

Good things weren’t meant for people like him. You weren’t meant for people like him.

You were a flower in a blooming field of color, while he was the parasite that ate away at your soft petals.

Simon left Price’s with a sour taste in his mouth. It was bile rising in his throat and threatening to combust. It tainted his tongue with sickening acid, and no matter how much he tried to swallow it down, it grew stronger.

He lost track of how long he’d stared down at the messages on his phone, all from you.

“Hey, Si! Where’d you go?”

“Tell me when you have to leave for a job next time, dummy.”

“I’ll pick up some food for you later when you come by!”

Every message was a slice in the arteries of his heart. It filled him with aching pain, one nothing could ever smooth over. You were the bandages that held him together, and what was he? The bastard who took advantage.

He couldn’t let it end like this. He couldn’t click the block button on your contact, he couldn’t walk away like he should. Not without seeing you one more time – because that’s all he was. Selfish, selfish, selfish, a word that echoed in his mind on repeat like an irritating buzz.

Simon’s legs moved on their own accord, already mapping out the path towards your apartment. He knew you’d be home, he knew you were waiting for him to return like normal for his nightly endeavors in your presence.

He moved in earnest, strides long and swift, passing by people on the street without a second thought. He kept his eyes trained forward, not letting a single distraction stop him from seeing you.

Just one goodbye. That’s all he needed.

Making it to the front of your door, he found himself slamming his fist along it, the booming knock filling the hallway. He never knocked, it wasn’t his thing, yet here he was, mind so cloudy that it was the first thing he thought to do.

When the door opened and he saw your ruffled expression, he released a sharp exhale, one he thinks he’d been holding the entire run here. His chest visibly relaxed, shoulders slouching, hand dropping to his side once the door was tugged away from his knocking.

“Simon?” you asked, lifting a hand up to grab hold of his shoulder in attempts to keep him steady while he caught his breath. “You– are you okay?”

“I–” he sputtered, swallowing down the lump in his throat. Simon stared at you before pushing his way into your apartment, slamming the door behind him and locking it up tight.

Millions of thoughts raced around his head, and all of them revolved around you. Not a single thought went unnoticed by your being, and they fluttered around anxiously, like butterflies rapidly flapping their wings and crossing over one another.

“Simon,” you called out again, and he snapped his head to look over at you. Your face was filled with concern, eyebrows pulled together, lips pressed in a thin line. His eyes shifted down, watching the way you frowned. Even when you were taut up tight, you still made him feel dizzy at the sight of you.

Simon’s body moved on its own accord. It was like he lost complete control, instincts taking over.

He tugged off his mask in a frenzy, letting it fall to the floor, before he surged towards you and took your lips in his. The kiss was feverish, desperate. It had your body jolting backwards at the sheer force of it, but when you regained your composure, you quickly fell into his kiss like a helpless puddle of goo.

Limbs entangled with one another, his arms bracketing around your waist and holding you as if letting go would cause you to disappear forever. Your chest was pressed flush against him, leaving you no room to wiggle out, but you melted into him with ease, uncaring of the sudden display of need.

It was dizzying, staggering. It left your mind a fumbled mess.

“Si–” you attempted to croak, word getting cut off as he sunk his teeth into your bottom lip. “What’s going on?”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it, sweetheart,” he breathed, nuzzling his face into the span of your jaw, lips brushing faintly against the skin. “I just need you. Please.”

You sucked in a shaky breath, hand coming up to tangle in the short locks of hair on his head. They were soft against your palm, and you smoothed them down.

“How–?”

“All of you. Please, sweetheart, just– you trust me, right?”

Selfish.

“Of course,” you mused. You felt him smile against your neck.

“Then please.”

“...Okay, Simon,” you whispered, because how could you deny the very man who did nothing but care for you to his best ability? Who saved you when nobody else was there to pick up the pieces and mend you together with the craftiness of their hands? “Okay.”

Simon breathed a heavy sigh of relief before pressing needy kisses along the expanse of your throat. Your head lolled to the side to allow him more access, mouth parting to release quiet gasps of surprise.

Every movement of his was unlike anything he’d done. He was always so calculated, so accurate and careful, yet this time, he was sloppy and unsystematic. It was as if he were only allowing his mind to take over, rather than logistics and realism.

The two of you moved in a clumsy dance, with him guiding you back towards the space of your bedroom with his arms unwavering around you and his lips continuing a messy attack on your neck. When you somehow made it past the door frame and into the comforting safe haven of your bedroom, his hands slipped down to the hem of your shirt, lifting it up over your head in a hurry.

“Is everything okay, Simon?” you asked worriedly, and he smiled at you, a tinge of sadness lingering at the back of his pupils.

“Just want to spend time with my pretty girl. Can I do that, sweetheart?”

You blinked at him when his hands came to a standstill against your hips, thumbs lightly brushing over the supple skin. His expression was so soft, one he only reserved for you and nobody else. The lines along his face were smoothened into a tender look, and you couldn’t help but admire it with a smile.

“You always can,” you assured, missing the way Simon winced.

Simon rushed forward once again, and your mouths met in an uncoordinated mess of teeth and tongue. It was hot and heavy, demanding and eager, and it showed in the way he lightly pushed you back to rest on your bed.

One of his hands pressed into the mattress next to your head while the other glossed over your side, cold fingertips causing goosebumps to rise. You shuddered, resting your own hands on each side of his jaw, tangling yourself and getting thrown into his web of affection.

“Wanna touch you,” he rasped, fingers sliding down to the hem of the pajama shorts you had yet to change out of, toying with it but not daring to pry until your say so. “Please.”

You sucked in a breath before promptly nodding, and that was all he needed to slip his fingers past the waistband, dipping his fingers into the warmth of your cunt. He was greeted with sweet wetness, and he let out a quiet groan into the curve of your neck, pressing a messy kiss there.

The pads of his fingers scooped up a bit of your slick like candied nectar, before rolling it around your clit, causing your legs to jolt in surprise. Air filled your lungs, burning at the expanding of your chest, before being released in a blissful form of a sigh, eyes fluttering up at him.

“M’gonna take care of you, sweetheart, I promise,” he murmured against your neck.

Simon’s fingers continued to toy at your clit with a feverish motion, circling at a messy pace. It wasn’t steady, but it didn’t matter – it felt good, and it brought butterflies to swarm in your stomach, blooming at the newfound feeling.

He was so gentle in the way he treated you, yet balanced it out with subtle desperation that had your toes curling as he worked wonders against your cunt. He’d circle your clit, before dipping down to tease at the wetness that sopped out of your hole, just to slide back up to continue the torturous prodding against your sensitive nub.

“Fuck, Simon,” you breathed, voice cracking.

“Yeah?” he hummed, his voice laced with sultry sweetness to it. “That okay, pretty girl? Wanna ruin you, fuck.”

“Please,” you pleaded, and the shakiness in your tone had him kissing you once before sliding his lips down. His fingers slipped out of your shorts, and before you could protest, they tugged down the fabric, soft against your legs, before he dropped them on the floor.

His hands gently spread your legs, and without a single hint of warning, you felt the warmth of his tongue press flat against your clit while his finger eased inside of you. Stars burst behind your eyes and you let out a strangled noise, hand frantically grasping on to his hair and gripping.

It was like the heavens were opening in the clouds above, shining warm rays of light all over you and heating you up from the inside. It was a delicious feeling, the way he sucked and slobbered all over your cunt like a man on a mission, his finger fucking inside of you with earnest.

Messy sounds filled the room combined with your pitiful whimpers and gasps of his name, and they only egged him on further.

If this was the last time he’d ever see you, he’d make it count. Your pleasure was his, and nothing else mattered.

One finger quickly became two, and he created a rhythm between fucking you with his fingers and swirling his tongue around your sensitive clit. The stimulation had you keening, already teetering on the edge of insanity. Your mind was blank and void of anything but moans of Simon’s name.

“Come on, pretty girl,” he breathed into your cunt, making you whine. “Come on. Cum on my fingers, know you can.”

His voice sent vibrations straight through your body, and your back arched with a wail, thighs clamping around his head in a death grip. They shook with the aftershocks of your climax, but that didn’t stop him from swallowing down every bit of you until it became too much.

He only released you when your fingers tugged on his hair, and when he sat back, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Simon smiled at you, eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas, pouring over with nothing short of admiration and awe.

You laid on the bed, breathless and sated, a sheen of sweat covering the expanse of your skin. It glimmered in the dim light of your room, and he pressed delicate kisses along the salty sweetness, making his way up your body.

“So good, sweetheart,” he cooed. “Told you m’gonna take care of you.”

You could nothing but nod dumbly, eyes half lidded as you watched him reach down between your two bodies to fiddle with the buckle of his pants. It clanged together, filling the air with glimpses of what was to come next, and when he got it undone, he wasted no time in tugging them down until he was bare from the waist down.

The sight was beautiful. His cock was hot and heavy between his legs, a slight shine over the flushed tip from precum, and you felt your mouth begin to water.

This was Simon in all of his glory, and only you had been the lucky one to see it. What an honor.

“So pretty,” Simon breathed, causing your gaze to snap up from his cock and to his face. His mouth was parted as his large hand wrapped around his cock, stroking it lazily while he looked at you. His breath fanned over your mouth from the close proximity. “So beautiful. You know that, don’t you, sweetheart?”

Your mind turned to mush at his words. You squirmed against the bed sheets, shyly looking away from him. His free hand came up to gently grasp your jaw, drawing you back to look at him, and his smile knocked the wind out of you.

“So fuckin’ pretty,” he repeated, pressing a chaste kiss on your lips.

The feeling of the head of his cock lining up with your entrance had you gasping into his mouth, and he smiled against you, eyes unwavering from yours as he stretched you open.

It was an ecstatic feeling, one that filled you to the brim with elation. It burned inside of you with flickering flames of want.

He continued to push, and push, until he was flush with you, fully seated inside of your warm, slippery heat. There was a scratch that only Simon could itch, and he knew this. It was why when he began to move inside of you, he started off slow before burrowing into a needy pace filled with smothering desire.

Simon rested his forearms on each side of your head, hovering over you while his hips snapped into you, greedily taking everything you had to offer. It sent you into a puddled mess, mouth hung open as throaty moans escaped every time he took more and more. Your fingernails dug into his biceps, grounding yourself as much as you could with the way your body jolted back and forth from the force of him fucking you.

Fucking? Is that what it was? It felt much more meaningful than that. Simon kissed you with sentiment, thrust into you with aching longingness, praised you like a goddess in the sky and you were his saint.

His groans and grunts filled your ears like lovely symphonies, each note sending goosebumps to rise along your arms and neck. It was a beautiful song, filling you with the wonders of emotions. You couldn’t get enough.

“My pretty girl,” he sighed. His own words seem to turn him on further, as his pace increased, becoming an aggressive slap of skin with every thrust. His cock dragged mercifully along the walls of your cunt, his leaking tip hitting the spongy spot and causing your body to go lax as you took and took. “What are you doin’ t’me?”

“Simon,” you whimpered, and he chuckled out a breathy laugh. With his forearms still resided on the sides of your head, his fingers interlocked on the top of your head, holding you firm against him and keeping you in place.

“So fuckin’ good t’me. Don’t deserve you.”

You clamped around him, causing him to groan. His pace was becoming messy and sloppy, but no less relenting.

“I’ll make sure you’re cared for. Won’t ever have to worry ‘bout anythin’ with me around,” he whispered, and you weren’t fully processing the words. To you, it was mindless babble that you simply took in through the hazy state of your mind, nodding eagerly at every empty promise.

The two of you were growing restless, your bodies building a molten core of unleashed pleasure that threatened to erupt at any given moment. It was hot and scalding, burning the pit of your stomach.

“You gonna cum, sweetheart?” he asked, almost mockingly. You cried, fingernails digging into his biceps so harshly, the skin nearly broke with pebbled drops of blood. “Yeah? Go ahead, I’ve got you.”

Your own body was betraying you, and you succumbed to the burst of bliss, chest pressing up against his, needy cries singing from your lips. Your eyes spotted with hints of black, the stimulation becoming overbearing.

Simon didn’t allow himself his own pleasure until you had yours, so when he felt you clench around him in a vice, he let himself go, spilling into you and flooding you with milky warmth. It coated your insides like a beautiful painting, filling you with douses of his undying affection.

He slumped on to you, face buried in the crook of your neck. The two of you laid there in comforting silence, catching your breaths and processing the new intimacy formed between you.

While you were riding on a cloud of euphoria, Simon was being dragged into the deepest pits of hell.

Selfish.

What a horrible person he was. All he had to do was let you go, but he did even worse than he had done before.

This was worse than killing men and women. This was worse than killing Graves out of rage.

He was going to leave you behind, make you feel like you meant nothing more than a calculated fuck, and he was going to burn in hell for it. All because he fell in love with you, all because he couldn’t kill you.

When Simon helped clean you up and buried you in your blankets, he waited until you were asleep, sedated and happy. Your frown lines were smoothed over with a look of peace and ecstasy, and he traced along the flush of your skin until he knew it was time.

He carefully made his way out of the comfort of your bed, movements slow as not to disturb you. He gathered his clothes, sifting them on with a hint of resentment for his own actions, and he left.

Just like that, he left.

Simon blocked your number without so much as a goodbye text, or an explanation, telling you that you did nothing wrong. He didn’t tell you that he was the issue, that he was the one in the wrong. Didn’t tell you he fell in love with you, and now he was facing the consequences for it.

He typed out one final message to Price, hoping to satisfy the bastard for what he forced him to do.

“It’s done.”

#cod #call of duty #simon ghost riley #cod mw3 #cod x reader #ghost cod #john price #ghost simon riley #simon riley #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #hitman au #cod fanfic #ghost

[6ix9inewiturmom]

Hair Dye- Christopher Sturniolo

Summary: chris was about to leave for the Versus tour but wanted to do something dramatic for his fans for the tour! you dye his hair and he dyes yours!

warnings: nothing :)

A/n: i was watching the video where chris dyed nicks hair and i thought it would be cute if i wrote a lil sumth based of this!

PSA: DONT STEAL MY WORK! IT BELONGS TO ME MYSELF AND I!

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Chris and I have been dating for roughly about 3 years. We had met not long after their YouTube became popular and quickly we both had made it official. Considering I was Chris’ first ‘real relationship’ because he had commitment issues and I swore off dating till college, we both moved to LA because we couldn't do long-distance.

“I can't believe we're going on fucking tour” Chris’ excitement squealed out of him as he's getting his bags ready for the Triplets ‘Verus Tour’

“What am I gonna do without you, I got this big ass house and big ass bed with no Chris to share it with,” I say sprawling in a starfish position.

“You could always invite Tara over, you two can do whatever you two do best together” he chuckles shoving some socks into a deep pocket of his suitcase.

“So drinking and partying?” I laugh out sitting up and resting my weight on my elbows.

“Please do not get drunk for over a month straight i would genuinely check you into a Rehabilitation center” Chris chuckled throwing his arms up.

“Don't worry I'll probably just chill here most of the time and eat, sleep, watch Gossip Girl for the 30th time, and occasionally go out with Tara,” I reassure him flicking my hand up and down brushing his comment off.

“I wanna do something crazy before tour,” he says as his lips curl up into a smirk.

“Like what? You guys leave in like 3 days” I adjust my body sitting up crisscross.

“I wanna dye my hair orange, 'cause you know each of us has a color for our team so like half of my outfits for tour consists of orange,” he says walking towards the bed sitting next to me.

“Chris normally I would be supportive of your impulsivity but dying your entire beautiful virgin brown hair orange? I won't support that one” i laugh running my nails through his long wavy brown locs of hair.

“Okay, maybe not my whole hair but maybe like the tips of my hair?” he says grabbing a small piece of hair and pointing at the tip of it.

“Chris it's 8 pm and no hair salon takes last-minute hair appointments and I only trust my hair stylist Hazel” I laugh sitting back and leaning my head against the headboard of the bed.

“Then why don't we do it? Walmart is still open and they have hair dye, right? I mean I've dyed Nick's hair before with the help of Maddie but how hard can it be?” he moves closer to me shooting me a smirk.

“I have dyed my hair before. Fuck it let's do it” I stand up off the bed smiling at Chris whose smirk turned into the happiest smile on his face.

We both chuckled and made our way downstairs to discover Matt and Nick giggling while looking at their phones.

“Where are you guys going?” Matt's head peaked up looking towards us.

“To get hair dye” Chris laughs and spoke before I could

“Oo Y/N what color are you dying your hair this time?” Nick shimmies his shoulders smirking.

“Well Chris wanted to do something crazy before the tour so he wanted me to dye the tips of his hair orange and I'm dying the underneath of my hair orange as well” I nervously spit out gripping Chris’ hands.

“Okay that's actually disgustingly adorable” Nick laughs out

“Well be back in like an hour” Chris and I walked out together, hand in hand, and made our way to my car.

We're currently sitting in the car, cruising down the road on our way to the nearby Walmart laughing at the possible situations that could happen.

“Are you sure you know what you're doing” Chris asks propping his feet up on the dashboard of the car.

“Chris it's gonna be fine” I reassure tapping his thigh laughing softly.

As we arrive at the Walmart parking lot, Chris steps out and stands in front of my car, his hand outstretched, waiting for me to take it as I step out of the car as we enter the store.

“What about this one?” he says “Splat is a cool name” he chuckles

“NO” I exclaim “That is one ingredient away from being fabric dye”

“Oh my god why would they make this stuff” his eyes go wide as he laughs and throws the box back on the shelf.

“Okay here, this is Manic Panic, Nick used it when he dyed his hair, it's pretty good” I say holding two jars of the dye.

“Okay, so how much do we need?” Chris gives his little sassy side eye when he's confused which happens to be a lot of times when I have to over-explain myself.

“Well you don't have a lot of hair to cover and since I'm only dying the back of my hair and maybe my money pieces then maybe two” my voice raises with question.

“Two it is” He nodded and smiled, his eyes sparkling with excitement as he reached for the hair dye. As he took my hand, a rush of warmth spread through me, and we made our way to the register together to check out.

The car ride home was filled with laughter and comfortability within each other. In the 3 years, we've been together, I can't remember a single time where we had ‘small talk’ or ‘chit chat’ we could always talk about something big or small for hours. It was always one of the things I loved about Chris, he was a yapper but we could always bounce back and forth with nonsense.

As we entered the house, we couldn't contain our laughter and giggles, our voices echoing through the halls as we made our way inside.

“Why are you two so disgustingly cute” Nick spits smiling at both of us.

“You acting like we're a new couple” Chris chuckled.

“No, but still so sickening how cute you guys are together even after 3 years of watching you two be together” Nick shrugs popping a piece of popcorn in his mouth.

With a chuckle, Chris leads me into the bathroom we both share. “Do you want me to use one of my old shirts to cover up with?” he asks leaning against the counter “We can just share the shirt too”

“Do you even own a shirt you don't care about?” I softly laughed.

“You know how many wife beaters I own, why question anything” he throws his hands up in defense laughing as he grabs a black tank top from his room and quickly swaps his shirt out.

“Okay sit between my legs” I smile up at him as he nods and sits Indian style between my legs.

“So how does hair dye work? Like what makes the color stay? Who invented it?” he questions as I start to apply the dye on the tips of his hair blending it out to create an ombre effect.

“Chris I'm not sure about any of those questions i just know that I use it, and I hope this will come out, or else Hazel is gonna be really mad at me” I chuckle out.

“So you don't know how it works? Or who invited it?” he leans his head back facing me as his big blue doe eyes stare at me.

I smile but lightly push his head back down to dye the back and the bottom of his hair. “You know I don't always know the answer to everything, I may always be right about most things but it ain't nothing to just go on Google and type it in,” I say softly laughing

“I know but why use Google when I have a super-smart girlfriend” he shrugs his shoulders smiling.

I carefully completed the styling of his hair, ensuring that I covered all the sections he wanted dyed and coated them with a vibrant orange color.

“Now we wait 45 minutes” I smile helping him up off the floor.

“YOUR TURN” he squeals holding his hands out for me. “Now you can sit between my legs” he smirks moving his shoulders.

“WAIT, let me section my hair because I don't want my whole hair orange,” I stand up go to the mirror and section my hair in a ‘Halo’ hairstyle. “okay here you go just dye the parts that aren’t in the bun up here” I smile sitting back between his legs.

“got it” he smiles back at me beginning to rub his fingers that are coated with orange color through my hair “If I pull your hair too hard let me know” he lightly pulls my head back to look at him before giving me a little peck on my lips.

He made sure his hands were gentle through my hair and made sure it was coated on every strand and maybe even overly coated. “I'm putting a lot of dye on your hair but only to make sure it is coated properly” he smiles moving my head to the side to get the side of my hair.

“This is nice” My lips curl upwards in a smile as my body becomes relaxed. “I enjoy these little bonding moments with you”

“Oh believe me I enjoy this more” he smiles “okay turn around so I can get your shorter pieces of hair”

As I turned around to face him, I noticed his eyes brightening with excitement as he carefully applied the dye to the shorter pieces of my hair.

“Okay now we wait” he smiles sitting next to me.

I pull out my phone and get a picture of Chris and me with the wet dye in our hair so we can remember this moment. “You're so beautiful ma” he smiles at our picture. “God I'm gonna marry that woman one day,” he says pointing at the picture on my phone.

“Chris you're so corny” I softly laugh out softly pushing his shoulder.

“You're gonna miss my corny jokes when I'm gone” he raises his eyebrows smirking.

“Chris you sound like you're dying, you're just going on tour, and we're gonna face time like every night, and I'm gonna come visit you obviously” I playfully roll my eyes.

“I won't let you not visit, you're gonna visit” he softly says placing a kiss on my cheek.

After 45 minutes had passed, Chris and I carefully rinsed out the dye from our hair and then proceeded to blow dry it. Chris wouldn't stop staring at himself in the mirror touching his hair and making goofy faces at himself.

“God we look fuckable” he smirks at me in the mirror.

“Christopher Owen” my jaw goes slack as the words come out of his mouth.

“I'm being honest we look hella good right now” he smiles “WE NEED TO POST THIS ON INSTA” he pulls out his phone taking a couple of pictures of us with our hair.

Liked by Nicolassturniolo, Matthewsturniolo and others

Christophersturniolo: Tour ready 🧡

______________________________________________

Nicolassturniolo: YALL ARE SO CUTE ITS SICKENING

Matthewsturniolo: i would give you the menu but yall already ate

> Matthewsturniolo: i don’t know why i said that..

Sturnioloteam: #theverustour

LuvY/N: we fuckable

> christophersturniolo: oh but it’s okay if you say it ✋😧🤚

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A/N PART 2: PLS IGNORE THE FACT THAT THE PICS ARE RED AND NOT ORANGE I COULD FIND ANY ON PINTREST LOL ALSO SORRY FOR THE INACTIVITY IVE HAD ZERO MOTIVATION BUT I

LOVE YALL AND I HOPE YALL HAVE AN AMAZING DAY/NIGHT/EVENING!

#SoundCloud #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo smut #the sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo #sturniolo fandom #sturniolo fan fic #chris sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo fluff #fan fic writing #fan fiction #fanfic #fandom

[dunmeshistash]

I’ve been seeing a lot of complaints abt lack of diversity in dunmeshi since the animation. What do u think abt it? Like I get wanting representation and giving black and brown ppl more characters to relate to would be absolutely fabulous, but I also feel that the western fandom are sometimes too entitled with things like that. I even see some ppl completely discrediting the whole show just bc there wasn’t a black character? This was meant for Japanese ppl. Most mangakas don’t expect their work to be animated initially unless they are already hugely successful and therefore don’t expect to get a major international audience, so the representation they put in will inherently be more relevant to Japanese ppl. But then again Japan does have a small but still significant black population, especially in the big cities so it’s still sth reasonable to ask for. Just, u know, not sth to discredit the whole show for especially considering the medium I think.

I must preface this once again by saying I'm just some guy™️and I'm not gonna say if it is or isn't good representation cause that's subjective. Rather I'll try to explain what I think about people's reactions (cause that's interesting to me)

I understand the complaints about the lack of diversity, and I don't think "this was made for a japanese audience" to be a good argument since the basis of the story and most of the characters are based on western fantasy. So most of the characters aren't even japanese, so it wasn't really a case of relatability.

I believe the arguments of lack of representation dungeon meshi suffers probably comes from a backlash to the overwhelming praise it gets, I think some people (me included sometimes) get a little too overexcited and overpraise it, especially when it comes to the representation.

We compare it to other anime and I think for that we kinda exaggerate on how much representation there actually is, cause most anime has none. So I guess some people dislike that the "bare minimum" is being praised as if is revolutionary, it can be frustrating for someone that wishes for good and real representation for themselves when they see the safest representation ever being praised as something out of the ordinary. I guess anime fans (ME INCLUDED) are like battered partners as soon as we get someone that treats us like human beings well we think they're god lmao.

The internet hates subtlety and critical thinking tho. So "It's not as good representation as you're hyping it up to be" becomes "this has shit representation" and people ignore that it IS a step on the right direction, especially when it comes to anime.

I think dungeon meshi is pretty cool representation wise for what it is tbh, especially when it comes to character design. Ryoko Kui is a master of representing varying people of all shapes and sizes, and I can tell as an artists she makes an effort with what she draws.

Why the main character are the most convetionally atractive well built ones, Why her drawings outside dungeon meshi are so much more diverse than dungeon meshi itself etc is things we can only guess 👍 (remembering that yeah, she doesn't really draw black people even outside dunmeshi)

Anyway once again I just think nuance is the ideal, it doesn't need to be "the best representation ever" nor "the worst representation ever" it is what it is, there's good things about it, bad things about it and okay things about it.

#Plus everyone is racist and you need to make a conscious effort to stop being racist #specially if you live in a mostly homogeneous country #I might be dark skinned but only recently (like in the last 5 years) have I started drawing more dark skinned characters #america is much farther in cultural awareness than many other countries #which isn't an excuse more of an explanation to why its rare to see good representation from anime #dunmeshi complaint

[deluweil]

Thanks for your response to that other anon about Tommy; you’re totally right. I also was intrigued, even liked him and Buck after their first kiss. But his closet comment and behavior on their first date, like he didn’t care that Buck has LITERALLY just figured out his bisexuality and that’s A LOT to process, his dismissive attitude towards Buck’s ideas and feelings (the bachelor party henley, the “enjoy it while it lasts” at the medal ceremony)….and then add in the way some fans have gone 0 to 100 on them so quickly, even calling them endgame, and likely at least in part JUST because it’s two men…it’s become such a turn off. I was neutral, even wanted to like them at first, but now am counting the days until it ends. And it’s not because I’m a BoB or would dislike any Buck LI that isn’t Eddie. And I don’t agree with anyone getting HATE (we can sideeye and judge people’s actions ($cameos$) But I think seeing Buck in a canon male/male relationship has caused some people to lose their damn minds. Ship and let ship! Stay in your sandbox, we’ll stay in ours!

LOL I am so removed from all the crowing bummies that I have to ask wth is BoB?

I actually went to look it up and found some interesting options, I am going with this one:

"Bob" is a generic and common name, and using it can be a way of avoiding formalities or creating a relaxed and approachable atmosphere

If you have the other meaning go ahead and tell me, like bummies I understand what benefits me in the moment😂

I kinda wish ppl will look up the meaning of "comphet" (I actually looked it up) that Ryan keeps bringing up in his interviews - that way ppl can stop saying crap things about him being the one to derail Eddie-T because he was supposedly against it. - Which is bullshit, Tim repeatedly said it was because the Natalia actress couldn't come back and M actress could. - Also, Originally T was supposed to be Lucy, she just couldn't come back so they took Lou in a pinch, so Obviously the endgame sure as shit wasn't the pilot.

And you're right, T's attitude was condescending at best, I was talking about it with a mutual the other day, and said that if they really had an interest to build BT properly, also by the time they came up with BT they knew they were being renewed for S8, they could have slowed into this. Actually make Buck's coming out story, a coming out story, not "So first date was a bust, how bout you come to my sister's wedding?" like who does that?

They could have started as friends with Lou being a gay guru, they could have had private dates until Buck was actually out to everyone and ready to be seen in public.

There could have been feelings involved that developed over time.

I gave the example of Tim-Ashley vs Nolan-Bailey from The Rookie, while Ashley was fairly kept to the background (btw she got more screen time than T, just saying) while Bailey was constantly and still being weaved into the story, intricated into Nolan's life, because he was meant to end up with her.

What ppl, who seem to have never watched good tv in their lives, don't seem to understand is that there is a way to write a story, and 911 not only screwed up spectacularly with Buck and Eddie's storylines, but they managed to make it clear from the get go that any LI to come along would be written just bad enough for it to be clear that they are not lasting.

Even furious, Eddie never walked away from Buck. Even when Buck was an asshole in 2x01, Eddie stood his ground and insisted they sort it through making it clear that they are on the same side, that he cares about him and wanting to be his friend. - His partner, a team.

Tommy, like all his predecessors, walked away as soon as something didn't fit his little comfort zone. Tommy walked away on that first date, he didn't contact Buck after that, Buck had to make contact and apologize for not being comfortable on his first date with a guy, like how messed up is that?

And Tommy's little acid retort in front of Eddie in the restaurant before that? From the side it's hilarious for someone who was never in that position. It was mean and uncalled for, but not exactly a surprise because T was never much of am understanding person, he was pretty much an ass from the get go in S2, only difference now is that he is out of the closet.

How did Athena put it when Michael first brought his new bf home after they got divorced? "If Michael had cheated on me with a woman, no one would have expected me to slap on a fake smile and welcome her into my home."

And that is exactly what the GA expects us to do, so what if Buck injured Eddie for attention? He's bi now.

So what if T was an ass and pretty much dismissive towards Buck and talks to him often in a bored way like one talks to a child? He's gay now.

A certain sexual preference does not excuse bad behavior. A person's behavior is supposed to be taken at face value, and not excused just because that person is now seeing someone who happens to be of the same gender.

Crappy behavior is just that - crappy behavior - equal accountability and all that.

I actually liked Taylor for Buck in S2, I think Lucy could have been perfect for him in S5, but the writers made sure to smear their characters in the eyes of the GA from the beginning, thus ending up with another failed relationship, while Buck's relationship with Eddie thrives from one episode to another for the last 7 seasons. One has to wonder about that even if they don't ship buddie.

Same pattern here with T. I was prepared to like him with Buck, I was prepared to see Buck making his way out of the closet with someone who would make him feel safe to do it, not kiss him unprepared under the pretense of coming originally on Eddie's behalf. Not that crap show that was that restaurant date. Not Buck apologizing after feeling insecure and exposed in public for the first time out of the closet and so many other things. - I'm getting the same vibes as Taylor looking through her phone in disinterest in 4x11 as Buck recites some google fact.

And you're right, the fans going from 0-200 after one kiss was just ridiculous, like chill people have you never seen two men kiss before?

I have, on screen and in RL, I grew up with lovely lgbtq+ friends from childhood, it's not all that. When my gay best friend dated someone who didn't treat him right, I told him to get rid of him. When my cousin's gf treated her like property and like she owes her something I urged her to find a better more nurturing person to be happy with.

Two men kissing is not endgame making, hell, from experience two men having sex (hot as it is) is not endgame making.

Love, passion, trust, security, fun, friends gatherings where they're cute and gross, can be made into a healthy endgame making relationship.

Buck and Tommy have physical attraction, they make for a steamy picture but nothing else.

And Lou, I am just... I don't know, I would have preferred not to find out the things he's done as cast of 911, I am just so disappointed.

I loved Lou, now it's just meh. Like he's trying to make as much money as he can before he finishes his way in the show is all kinds of wrong. Also very misleading to the ppl who are hanging on his every word. (And I don't think Oliver likes it either, he is pointedly ignoring any scene with T, not promoting anything that doesn't involve Eddie and Christopher or Buck's own development).

Even Ryan didn't know he was going to get shot until he got the 4x13 script, he was sure he was being killed off until he talked to whoever was showrunner at the time lol.

So Lou can't know he just talks out of his ass and make himself look bad in the process.

And I agree, ppl should be free to ship whoever they desire, but they are not entitled to force their desires upon others, I'm talking about both sides of the ships not just one. (Although I gotta say I've never got hate asks until a certain ship popped up this season. A lot of hateful - now blocked anons - that I refused to give stage to.)

These toxic battles are useless and made this season worse than it's writing.

All that's left is kick back and hope this season's last episode can salvage the poor and repetitive storylines we got this season, - I mean even Henren and Bathena got a replay of S4.

And don't even get me started of the fart shaped storyline Eddie got after switching last minute.

I'm tired lol

didn't mean for this to become this long monster, If you made it this far thank you, sending LOTS of love. ❤️

#911 ask #anti tommy kinard #anti bucktommy #anti bummies - seriously ppl get a life #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #ryan guzman #oliver stark #not tagging the third wheel #911 spoilers #911 speculation #fandom toxicity #fandom hypocrisy #deluweil replies #thank you anon for the ask❤️ #btw as per usual don't come at me in my inbox and don't repost to counteract make your own post

[allthegothihopgirls]

just finished reading death in the family properly and. whoo the racist undertones are racist undertoning. but uh. wanted to say that i cannot understand why people hated jason back then because like. he’s just a kid. he’s a KID. shaking 80s fans by the shoulders he’s a CHILD. he’s not gonna be a mature adult he’s gonna be a little weird and a little annoying even!! but he is a KID.

also wanted to ask your opinions on the jason has chronic pain headcanon? i personally as someone w chronic pain really enjoy it because it makes sense and i am a firm believer that we need more representation of invisible disabilities like some chronic pain is (and mine is) but ive heard a few people say they don’t like it

— baptism anon

right?? like yeah i think jason dying was the most beneficial thing to ever happen to his character, and he also had next-to-no defining traits as robin apart from being a dick grayson carbon-copy + replacement... but i don't get why people hated him.

~

jason w/ chronic pain!!!!!! oh boy i have feelings about him... i LOVE.

especially when it's death-induced.. a bit like phantom feeling/pain, but instead it is. very. real. like, he has chronic joint pain in places where joker hit him a few too many times etc. personally i reject the 'lazarus pit made him squeaky clean' canon, so on top of him keeping all his scars, and being more frankenstein than man.. chronic pain fits in very well.

i also definitely enjoy headcanons of him with chronic migraines.. not because i'm projecting.

i think it's a pretty agreed-upon headcanon that jason isn't a fan of medication in the slightest, due to his mother's death (only making exceptions when he's sustained more than a minor injury on patrol or a mission and is being tended to).

so i propose, stubborn jason w/ chronic migraines, who will never admit to needing actual medication. obviously he isn't going to be stupid about it, he won't patrol if it's too bad, and maybe tries to ward it off with some regular ibuprofen. but he is so against being properly medicated for prevention or treatment, and gets super defensive if dick or bruce suggest it to him.

he's always in varying levels of head hurt™ and just. lives with it. in the comfort of his own apartment he's definitely not a stranger to herbal teas and heat packs though.. however at the same time he's 100% beating himself up whenever he can't just power through.

i don't think he'd actively tell anyone either. dick figures it out from the way he'll rub at his temples post-patrol, or maybe a couple of unclosed search tabs on a computer 'whydoesmyheadalwayshurt' or 'home remedies: how to naturally prevent migraines'

for bruce finding out i have a bit more of a developed idea. jason's gone out patrolling with a migraine, against his better judgement. he's on comms with bruce, who's getting his assistance on a case he's been tracking. seemingly out of nowhere he hisses a little in pain, and bruce is asking what's wrong.

jason grows defensive quickly and spurts out a routine "imfinedontworry" but was apparently not convincing enough because before he knows it bruce is asking "status?" ..and he swears there's a microchip in him somewhere that forces him to give a truthful answer, because it's not like he wants to tell bruce his head's hurting, because that's just plain embarrassing. he doesn't want people thinking that he can't handle pain that miniscule.

between that and the other times he's been asked "red hood, report" and stated his condition, adding on a "head hurts a bit too, but that's just normal".. it wasn't difficult for bruce to suspect something unusual.

moving away from migraines, i think he also experiences chronic joint pain. compared to the previously mentioned, it's easier to play joint pain off as 'normal' and convince himself there's no cause for concern. he's 100% in denial of having an actual issue, which i'd like to think somewhat comes from bruce experiencing the exact same thing, and jason watching him absolutely refuse to admit any weakness it causes him.

he ends up believing it's just something that happens to everyone (well, at least everyone who dresses up and fights crime on the regular). jason's confused when dick's asking him if he wants to stick around for a chat post-patrol, because is dick not also desperate to go home, ice his joints, and spend time doing stretches to ease his pain before finally getting some sleep?????

i don't think he'd realise that it isn't a normal thing until he's called out on it. maybe he makes an off-comment about 'never feeling 75%, let alone 100%' comfort-wise, and damian remarks how that is. an issue. jason's instantly defending himself "yeah well that's just what happens when you've been in the business for this long-" and dick chimes in to point out that he doesn't feel like that. from there i think he goes to an even larger effort to hide any pain he's in.

big believer in jason being a cane user too. i think babs is the one who convinces him to start using one, after the events of this panel ↓ ↓ ↓ 

you cannot tell me that she's letting that comment slide: "that book looked... useful" plus "i don't think i've ever been okay", ok jason mr 'i really resonated with this and now i'm having revelations' todd.

she's 100% sitting his ass down for a real talk about whatever he has going on.

and i think afterwards, babs suggests that he really considers mobility aids. to which i think he ends up being very accidentally ableist, in the 'but those are for old people' way. it takes... a lot to reverse his somewhat internalised ableism, and get him to at least try a mobility aid out.

he grows less opposed to it as he realises that it's not something he's obligated to use all the time, and that it works. so he uses a cane around his apartment, and around the manor when he gets to be confident enough (he's a bit worried of people asking questions, but no one even bats an eye, because it just makes sense).

i have a whole other set of thoughts about the batfamily + how they go about jason using a cane... but i think i've gone on for long enough.. my apologies

in conclusion... chronic pain!jason todd is a HUGE headcanon of mine. love it a lot.

#asks #baptism anon #jason todd #chronic pain #red hood #robin #bruce wayne #batman #dc batman #dc a death in the family #dc comics #dcu #dc #gothihop speaks

[elisysd]

15. Well, I've been afraid of changin' 'cause I've built my life around you

Masterlist - Previously - Next

Chapter soundtrack: Landslide - Fleetwood Mac

You were a bundle of nerves, barely able to sleep that night, too busy mentally preparing scenarios about all the ways meeting Charles’ family could go wrong. You hadn’t even dared to move during the night, scared of waking up your boyfriend who was sound asleep by your side. He needed every bit of sleep he could get. So, as soon as the sun had started to rise, you had left the bed and gone on a run along the harbor, enjoying the peace and quiet there.

It  felt nice to be able to sort out your thoughts on your own, trying to find a sense of belonging, a new purpose in life, but you couldn't shake off the feeling of failure. It was a tough pill to swallow. You knew it was your fault, you knew that you shouldn’t have told your boss about your affair with Charles as soon as the first sparks started to ignite between the both of you. You had been a coward, you had been scared to lose everything but in the end, it had happened. Now, you didn’t know where life would take you but also, for the first time in your life you had the opportunity to do things for yourself without the pressure of a lingering promise or without feeling the need to make your parents proud. You could do something for you. You just needed to find what it would be.

When you came back home an hour later, you were surprised to see Charles attempting to prepare breakfast even if the kitchen was looking like a warfield. Pancakes’ batter was spread on the counter but it didn’t prevent Charles to casually smile at you, unbothered by the mess around him.

“I missed you in bed this morning.”

“I woke up early and decided to go on a run.” you explained as you poured yourself a glass of water.

“We could have gone together.”

“I needed to clear my mind. Between my job, or more the lack of, and our relationship made public and now how I’m going to meet your family in less than two hours… It's a lot.” you sighed, sitting on a chair as he handed you a plate of fluffy pancakes, something you weren’t expecting considering the mess in the kitchen, a cup of fruit and a freshly brewed coffee. “I’m scared. I’m terrified, even.”

“Why?”

“What if your mom doesn’t like me? What if your family doesn’t accept me? Because after all, why would they when my own family is rejecting me and pretending I don’t exist….” you gulped, feeling tears prickling behind your eyelids, making you look away. It hurt to admit it out loud and you suddenly felt very stupid.

“Y/N…” he kneeled in front of you, taking your hands in his. “My family is not like yours, thankfully. They just want to see me happy and guess what? You make me very happy. That’s all that matters to them.”

You nodded, unable to find the right words to express how much you needed to hear these words. But still, you were barely able to eat anything and when you finally left for the yacht, your legs were nothing but jelly.

Charles briefly stopped at a grocery store to pick up some food while you were waiting for him in the car. You quickly noticed the army of fans who were waiting for him and you watched him taking his time to sign caps and take pictures with everyone. You gulped. How could you have ever thought he was not genuine? You barely noticed people taking pictures of you inside the car, too focused on your boyfriend. 

“Hey, mister popular.” you smiled when he came back inside the car, a sheepish smile on his face.

“Sorry… I didn’t think we would get noticed so easily.”

“I suppose I have to get used to that.”

“I’m sorry.” he linked his fingers to yours and drove away from the crowd.

When you arrived at his yacht, you were glad to notice you were the only ones. You helped Charles prepare everything until Charles saw his older brother and his girlfriend arriving, followed by Arthur and Carla as well as Pascale, Charles’ mom. Charles went to greet them, not noticing how your body froze and your breathing became more and more shallow. You gripped to the first chair you found, trying to calm yourself down and praying to not faint in front of them. You closed your eyes, your ears ringing and gulped. It was hot outside, too hot and you barely heard Charles’ voice calling for you before you felt your eyes rolling backwards, your body doing the same.

Waking up, you expected to see the worried face of your boyfriend but instead, it was his mom who was looking at you, a towel soaked in icy water on your forehead. You were inside the yacht, away from the sun and the noise. You could hear muffled voices on the outside. You didn’t know what to say, words begging to come out of your mouth but you didn’t know where to begin. What an amazing first impression you had made. Sensing your distress, pascale put her hand on yours, squeezing it gently.

“You scared everyone out there, darling. How are you feeling? Do you need anything? Water? My son?” she smiled.

“This is not how I planned to meet you…” you stuttered, your voice sore.

“It’s a first meeting to remember for sure. I’m glad you’re okay. Charles told me a lot of things about you.”

“I’m sorry.” you apologized, thinking about how you had treated Charles at first and being sure that his mom knew. “I wasn’t the nicest with your son.”

“Don’t apologize. It makes me happy that not everyone treats him like a god. It’s good for his ego.” she winked. “Of course when he told me you were a journalist I got scared but I'm not one to judge without getting to know you first. and I trust my son… he loves you a lot. ”

“I love him a lot too.”

“I know. No one would make the choice of putting their career at risk for someone if they had no real feelings for them. That's how I know Charles is between good hands, in a happy, loving and healthy relationship. That’s all I want for him.”

She put her hand on your cheek, removing a strand of hair and putting it behind your ear. It wasn’t much, but it had been so long since someone had acted so motherly around you that it was enough to make you cry.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to overstep.”

“You didn’t.” you quickly reassured her. “It’s just… I’m not used to people being affectionate around me.” you briefly explained.

Pascale gave you a tender smile before leaving you to rest. You felt bad about sleeping for a good part of the afternoon while Charles was having fun with his family but around dinner you were feeling much better. You took a deep breath and went out seeing Lorenzo and Pascale preparing the table. You slowly approached as the mother saw you and gave you a big smile.

“Can I do something?” you asked.

“You can sit, we’re done with it.” Pascale replied.

“And I don’t think my brother would appreciate us making you work. I’m Lorenzo, by the way. We didn’t have time to meet.” you saw a glimpse of playfulness in his eyes that made you blush.

Thankfully you didn’t have time to add anything as Charles was walking to you, embracing you, a hand on your cheek, checking for the slightest sign of you being weak or in pain.

“Im’ okay, Charles.” you smiled.

“You sure? How is your head? You tell me if you don't feel good, alright?”

You nodded before kissing him as Arthur, Carla and Charlotte were coming in your directions. As dinner progressed and laughter filled the table, you couldn’t help but notice how they were all close to each other. There was so much love there that it made you think about your own family. You looked down on your fingers and apologized, pretending to need to go to the bathroom. You locked yourself in and looked at your reflection in the mirror. You couldn’t help but feeling like an intruder in this family, you weren’t fitting. And that hurt you so much. You heard a few knocks and Charles’ voice outside. You sprayed some water on your face, to try to make you feel more alive and opened the door.

“You’ve been in there for the past fifteen minutes… I was starting to get worried.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you?”

It’s just… It’s very stupid. I wasn’t expecting your family to be this… family oriented? It just showed me what a family is supposed to look like and it hit home a bit too close. And it’s not your fault. It’s just a reminder of what I will never have and I wasn’t ready to face it. Luc's death broke my family apart when your dad’s death only brought yours closer. I guess… I’m jealous and sad.”

“I understand you and I didn’t think you could feel like that. I’m sorry.”

“I wasn't expected it either.”

“You know… we can be your new family. I you want.”

Your ride back to the apartment was made in silence. You were tired and despite your little fainting, you had a nice evening. Your conversation with Charles had helped you making you feel less awkward and more at ease around his brothers and mother. You had fun. You even exchanged phone numbers with Carla and Charlotte promising to meet someday soon for a coffee or a shopping session. When Charles finally parked his car and as you were about to leave, he stopped you.

“Do you want to come to Zandvoort with me?” he blurted out, avoiding your gaze and you were almost sure he was blushing.

You bit your lower lip, hesitating.

“It’s going to be weird for me to be in the paddock without a media badge… And that would mean that it would be our first official outing as a couple. It would make things really official.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No… it’s just scary. But at the same time, it would be wrong of me to say that I don’t want to have access to the Ferrari’s hospitality and garage the way I want to.” you cheekily added, making him laugh.

“As long as you promise me to not snoop around.”

“You are asking a lot from me.” 

Being on a race weekend without your team, without any interviews to prepare, without your laptop was a foreign feeling, something you were not used to anymore. It was also making you vulnerable, you were not in control of the situation anymore, you had to match your pace to Charles’. You didn’t want to be considered as Charles’ puppy who would follow him around because you had nothing better to do. You were scared to feel bored and out of place, you didn’t want to sit around and wait for him. You wanted to feel useful.

“I promise you, we will find you something to do. Meanwhile, I have a gift for you.” he said, awkwardly standing in front of you.

“Charles… why?”

“Because I wanted to. And because I know that these past few weeks have been tough on you and I just want you to feel loved and cared for…”

“You don’t need to give me anything, I know you love me, you don’t need to prove to me anything.”

“I want to.” he replied, fumbling in his pocket to retrieve a jewelry box and handing it to you. You took it, noticing the blush on his face spreading to his neck. Opening it you almost gasped. It was a thin silver necklace, delicate and simple with the number sixteen made of tiny little diamonds. 

“Charles… gosh, it’s beautiful. But… you really shouldn't have…”

“I know but…I wanted you to have something from me when I wasn’t around, so you know that even if I am not right next to you, I’m still with you. It’s cheesy…”

“It’s not. It’s sweet. Can you put it on me?”

You felt his hands shaking around your neck as he placed the jewel around you.

“It’s really beautiful.” you said as he kissed the back of your head, telling you they had to go for the first free practice of the session.

She could see the crowd waiting for Charles to get out of the car, making her gulp and second guessing her decision to follow him.

“I can come back later if you don’t want to attract the attention more than necessary…”

“I don’t want to hide you. Not anymore.” he simply said. “Do you trust me?”

“More than anyone else.”

He nodded and got out of the car before quickly coming to your door to open it and handed his hand for you to take. His grip was firm and you knew that you didn’t have to worry. So, you took a deep breath and you chin high, you walked right next to him as flashes from cameras almost blinded you and screams from the fans were almost making you deaf. But you wouldn’t back down. You were ready. 

Author's note: What a pole, what a qualifying session it has been! I'm so happy so let's celerate with this chapter! Daghe Charles!

Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.

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#charles leclerc 16 #formula 1 #writing #fiction #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #f1 x oc #charles leclerc fanfic #cl16 #scuderia ferrari #ferrari #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc f1 #charles leclerc fic #f1 x reader #cl16 x reader #driver x reader #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc

[olderthannetfic]

I'm a bit conflicted about how I feel about other kpop fans wanting their favorite idols to be more outspoken about social/political issues.

On the one hand, they're not supposed to be viewed as people. They're idols. They're products (that are mass produced by entertainment companies with the explicit purpose of mimicking Black American groups from the 90s, the transparency of the process being the only thing unique to kpop). They may have the pr-approved visage of being "relatable," but their industry is wholly reliant on stan-culture. To maintain their biases and favorite groups, fans have to obsessively stream, buy, vote, post, tweet, etc about their faves to support them and their companies (which is also why, unfortunately, fans with good causes like wanting to boycott Hybe will always fail). It's an entire industry funded by using idols as objects of worship for fans. If they were to speak on political and social issues, it would disrupt this system and risk losing money for multiple parties.

On the other hand, I think more kpop fans should be glad our faves don't speak on "difficult" topics. South Korea is a pretty conservative country. Even things like feminism and equal rights for women are widely disparaged by both men and women. They have politicians, like us in Western countries, who run entire campaigns based on being "anti-feminist" and win. We have no idea what idols actually think, despite what they may say on a live or sing/"rap" in a song. Think about how many male idols were involved in the Burning Sun scandal. Millions of fans were surprised, but I'm sure the people who actually know them weren't. Then think on the female idols, like Hyuna, who is now dating one of those male idols. I'm a Black queer woman in the states who likes hip hop. Regarding topics like SA, bigotry, homophobia, misogyny, etc. I, unfortunately, hear very often what the artists I listen to think. More kpop fans should probably be thankful they don't know where their faves stand on certain issues.

--

Hah. Yes, there's many an artist whose sound I love, but when he stops talking about his own demographic... oh dear.

And I'm howling at your description of the idol industry. Too accurate.

[glittergoblinzz]

Ghoap (well, Cbf!Soap mainly) asking Afab!Reader to be their surrogate (pt 2)

(pt 1 here)

CW: Simon rants, Mentions of abuse (physical, mental and sexual), suicidal thoughts, and death

Sorry for being gone so long. Had a family emergency and had to go out of state for a few weeks for a funeral. I'm back now though!

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It's been a couple months since Johnny had shown up at your flat with the proposal of you being a surrogate for him and his husband, Simon Riley....or 'Ghost' as what he prefers you call him. Since then, you've gone out with the boys to try and connect with Simon before actually deciding on whether or not you want to actually do that. Needless to say....it's been rough.

Simon is quiet, rude, stubborn and closed off. Every outting with him and Johnny, he always looks like he'd rather be somewhere else, never saying a word to you or responding to your questions unless Johnny shot him a glare or elbowed him.

"Ah, don't mind him, Lass. He's just....had a rough life. Just give him time and he'll eventually warm up to ye. It'll help if ya find somethin' to bound with him over with."

Johnny's words continuously echoed in your head as you sat with Simon in his and Johnny's home in the living room. Johnny thought it would be a good idea for you two to spend some time together alone while he went to go pick up some take out for you three. You decide to follow what Johnny suggested as you and Simon sit on the couch, watching a football game.

"So....a fan of football, huh?"

You ask, wanting to break the ice between you somehow. Simon doesn't acknowledge you as he continues watching the game on TV, a drink in his hand. You wait for a few moments for an answer before letting out a soft huff in annoyance when you realize you won't be getting one. If it weren't for Johnny, you would have left already. So instead, you keep trying to get through to the big brute.

"What's your favorite team? I'm personally a fan of Chelsea...."

Simon just continues watching the game, occasionally taking a sip of his drink....though out could have swore you saw his grip tighten just a bit at the mention of Chelsea, which gives you an idea. Relaxing on the couch a bit, you turn your focus to the game as well. It was a game between Manchester United and Liverpool, with Manchester in the lead by quite a few points.

"Manchester is doing well, but they're starting to get a little sloppy. If they don't watch themselves, Liverpool might catch up and win by the end of the game."

Simon just rolls his eyes and lets out a grunt as you say that. You were starting to slowly but surely getting to him.

"I wouldn't mind Liverpool winning. Despite my love for Chelsea, Liverpool is also a decent team. I've got faith they can win this."

Simon's eyes quickly glance towards you, irritation building in them, before turning his attention back to the game. Though it was such a fast glance, if you had blinked you would've missed it. A Manchester boy, huh?

"Don't get me wrong, Manchester United is a good club, but I just don't think they're gonna win this game. They're getting too sloppy."

As if on cue, Liverpool manages to score, causing Simon's brows to furrow and the Brit to grumble something under his breath. You just sit there on one end of the couch and Simon on the other end, watching the game in silence for a few more moments before you speak again.

"Are you just going to ignore me the entire time?"

Again, Simon doesn't answer and you're starting to get fed up with this. You're wanting this to work for Johnny's sake but Simon is making it nearly impossible. Instead, you try a different approach.

"Listen, Simon, I get-"

You're immediately cut off by Simon slamming his glass down on the nearby table as he turns to look, no, glare at you with a stare that could kill.

"Don't you dare call me that. You don't have the right to call me that. Only call me 'Ghost'...."

Simon's voiced was laced with venom and hatred as he got up and stormed off to a different room, leaving you sitting there alone. A part of you wanted to leave, let Johnny know that it wasn't working out and that they'd have to find a different alternative to have a child....but another part of you didn't want to give up that easily on Johnny or Simon. You take a few minutes to let Simon cool off a little before you get up to follow him.

You find him in his and Johnny's bedroom, the door slightly open allowing you to see him sitting on the edge of the bed. He has his back towards the door, his chest rising and falling in a heavy manner. You give a gentle knock on the door frame, causing Simon to visibly tense up.

"Ghost? Listen, I just....I want to apologize...."

You start off as Simon slowly turns to look at you. If looks could kill, the look Simon is giving you would have killed you a dozen times over at least. You take a deep breath before continuing.

"I didn't mean to upset you. I didn't mean to annoy you or whatever....I just....I'm just trying to get to know you. Yes, a part of it is for Johnny and his little surrogacy plan but..."

You shrug a little, rubbing the back of your neck as you glance away from Simon.

"But I genuinely do want to get to know you, even if we don't go through with the whole surrogacy thing....I understand that you may hate me or whatever-"

"I don't hate you."

You stop as Simon cuts you off and just give him a bewildered look. He doesn't hate you? The bewildered look immediately turns into a slight frown as you try to process this. Everytime you've been around Simon, even the first time you met all those months ago, he always seemed to have a strong distain for you.

"What? But the way you-"

"Yeah, I know. The way I act says otherwise, but what I say is true. I don't hate you."

"Then why do you-"

"To protect myself....and you."

Now you're genuinely dumbfounded. You can understand him putting up the walls to protect himself, after all Johnny did say his life hasn't been the best....but to protect you too? Simon could see the confusion in your eyes so he motions for you to come sit on the bed next to him, which you hesitantly do. He runs a hand through his short, black hair before looking at you.

"Listen, love. I don't know what Johnny has told you, but I'm not the kind of man you'd want to be around. I'm not only a cold-hearted bastard but I've also got enemies. Enemies that want not only me dead but also the people around me. So I tend to keep my circle small, only filled with people who can take care of themselves...and quite frankly, you don't look like you can take care of yourself. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you got hurt....or worse."

"What? Why not?"

Simon looks hesitant to say. He looks away, his gaze going anywhere but to you.

"Because I care about you, that's why. You're Johnny's childhood friend, his best friend. You mean a lot to him, so you mean a lot to me as well....even if I don't show it."

You take a minute to wrap your head around this. Simon cares about you? Sensing your confusion, Simon continues.

"Shortly after we tied the knot, Johnny starting talking about starting a family. The adoption process would take too long for him and we didn't trust just some random person carrying our child. We needed someone who we could trust that wouldn't change their mind last minute and run off with the baby. So, Johnny suggested you. He started showing me pictures of you two together from over the years, telling me all about you. Honestly, I felt a bit jealous with how he was talking so sweetly about you. Especially when he confessed to crushing on you a little back in your teenage years. I was going to say 'no, absolutely not', That we could just ask Laswell or someone else who we were both close with...but, I don't know what happened. The more he talked about you, the more pictures he showed of you....I just....I knew you had to be the mother of our child. So, I went along with Johnny's plan to ask you to be our surrogate."

Simon pauses for a moment before continuing.

"Yet, when we first met that day in person....all of my insecurities and fear came washing over me. You were just so....innocent. With the lives Johnny and I live, I didn't want to pull you into all that. So I tried pushing you away. It's not an excuse to be an absolute arse, I know, but I just couldn't bare to get close to you only for something to happen to you...."

"Only for something to happen to me...? Ghost, what are you talking about?"

Simon pauses, debating whether or not to tell you. Finally, he takes a deep breath and speaks.

"Let me ask you this....What has Johnny told you about me? About my past?"

"Nothing except that you've got a rough past."

Simon laughs, shaking his head.

"Rough doesn't cover it....I suppose if Johnny trusts you, then so do I. Just....be prepared for what I'm about to tell you. What I'm going to tell you isn't rainbows and sunshine."

Simon takes a moment to mentally prepare himself. He doesn't like talking about his past at all....but he knew that you needed to know in order to understand where he's coming from.

"Okay, let's start from the beginning....I didn't have the best childhood growing up. My father was an abusive piece of shit. He would hit me...bring home dangerous animals and make me kiss them....he'd even put on face paint, mimicking a skull, to scare the shit out of me at nights. My little brother, Tommy, would join in on that. Peering down from our shared bunk on top, knife in hand in his own skull face paint. I don't blame him, though. He was an impressionable young kid. Anyways, the moment I was able to, I signed up for the military. I wanted to get as far away from my father as possible. I stayed gone for years, only returning shortly after reaching the rank of 'Lieutenant' in the SAS. When I came back, everything was a damn mess."

"My father was a drug addict, and ended up getting my brother addicted. My brother would steal from our mother and even put his hands on her once. I got fed up once I heard that. I went out, found my father and beat the shit out of him. Told him he wasn't welcome at home anymore. Then I went to go set Tommy straight. I had to rough him up a little but I didn't beat him as much as I did my father. He was still my baby brother after all. I dragged his ass to rehab, got him the help he needed. It worked as he met and married a woman, Beth, and had a child with her named Joseph."

"Then, on my next deployment, everything went to shit. I was transferred over to America to help take down a notorious Mexican Cartel leader; Manuel 'El Gordo' Roba. I won't go into the details, but our squad leader, Vernon, was secretly working for Roba the whole time. This lead to me, Sparks and Washington getting captured. We were held captive for months. The torture Roba inflicted on us....it was..."

Simon takes a moment to collect himself. He was starting to tremble a little, his fists clenched so tightly that his nails dug into his skin, causing him to bleed a little.

"What that bastard put us through was unimaginable. He wanted to brainwash us. To turn us into his puppets. It ended up working on Sparks and Washington, but not me. Despite the beatings, rape and other torture methods Roba dished out, I refused to let that pig win. Eventually, after six months of continuous torture, he realized I wasn't going to break, so he had me taken out to the middle of nowhere near the Texas border to be buried alive....right along with Vernon. It took me thirteen hours to dig myself out of that damn grave with Vernon's jaw bone."

"I somehow survived all of that, dragging my ass back into the States where a Texas Sheriff eventually found me. I was put on leave from the Military for a while, put into required therapy as I was sent back home to recover. The therapy didn't do shit. I could still see Roba in my dreams....could still feel every damn thing he did to me...."

Simon was starting to tear up now. He felt weak. He felt pathetic. You could see that in his eyes, so you gently put your hand on his shoulder. At first Simon tenses up, but then he eventually relaxes and grabs your hand, holding onto it in a vice grip.

"One night, specifically Christmas, Sparks showed up at my mother's house where I was staying for a while. I didn't know he and Washington had been brainwashed by Roba at the time, but I sure as hell would find out the hard way later that night. Anyways, Sparks asks me if I want to go out for drinks. Thinking nothing of it, I agreed. As the night went on, we had a bit of fun catching up....until he saw a woman at the bar. He tried hitting on her but she rejected him. After we left the bar and were walking back to his hotel room, we saw the woman again. Sparks decided to try his luck once more, only to be rejected yet again."

"He ends up knocking the woman out, telling me to help him carry her into her home. I knew what he was doing, that he was planning on raping her. I couldn't believe that this was the same man I served with, the same man I once constantly a friend. I play along, digging through the woman's purse to try and find her keys but instead, I use her phone to subtly call the cops. I make sure to get Sparks to admit to his plan of raping her so the cops would arrive quicker than usual. It worked, so Sparks and I take off back to his hotel room before the cops arrive. Back at his hotel, I go to confront Sparks but he was one step ahead of me. I end up knocking him out but Washington ends up coming in. He shoots me in the leg but I escape by jumping out the window. I head back home but....then I...."

Simon's grip on your hand tightens even more, his face scrunched up in pain. Despite the fact your hand felt like it was going to snap in two due to his grip, you ignore the feeling and gently stroke the back of his hand with your thumb.

"You don't need to continue if you don't want to, Ghost...."

He shakes his head and takes a deep breath.

"No, I've gotta do this. I need to speak about this to someone...."

"Anyways....I get back home, only to find that Washington had been there. My whole family; my mom, brother, sister-in-law and nephew.....they were all shot and killed. My goddamn nephew who was only twelve! Dead! All because I wasn't able to protect them....because I decided to go have a damn drink instead of being there with them that night....on Christmas of all nights!"

You could feel the anger and self-hatred oozing from Simon. The tears were streaming down his face now as he kept going.

"I wanted to die. I had nothing left. I got my gun and put the damn barrel into my mouth, ready to pull the trigger....but I couldn't do it. Not when Sparks, Washington and Roba were still out there. So I set out to take them down. Sparks and Washington were easy. I ended up switching my dog tags with Sparks' before setting his room on fire. His body would be too charred to be able to do a good enough DNA test to identify him. So on that Christmas night, Simon Riley died and all that was left was a Ghost...."

Simon takes a deep breath before telling about how he had gone down to Mexico to take Roba out next, to which he obviously succeeded since he was still here. You could only just sit there, feeling horrible for the man next to you. He had truly gone through Hell and back. It was no wonder he couldn't trust anyone...no, wouldn't trust anyone.

"That's why I didn't want to get you involved, love. I can't handle losing another person I love. I just can't...."

Simon's grip on your hand lessens but was still fairly tight as he looks over at you, his eyes slightly red and puffy from crying. You give his hand a gentle squeeze and use your free hand to gently wipe away stray tears that were falling down his face.

"You don't have to worry. Nothing will happen with you and Johnny around, ya know? Besides, if it'll make you feel any better....I do know a bit of self defense. My father was in the military and taught me how to defend myself..."

You smile and give Simon's shoulder a playful punch

"Bloody hell, I bet I could even take ya down in a sparring match."

Simon slightly smirks, letting out a small chuckle.

"You seriously think you could? I'm like twice your size...I could snap you like a twig if I wanted to."

You roll your eyes, your grin growing wider.

"Yeah, you say that now until I've got ya pinned and tapping out."

Simon shakes his head, the small smile still on his face. Suddenly, he pulls you in and wraps his arms around you.

"I'm truly sorry for how I've been acting these past few months, love. Like I said before, there's no excuse for it. Also....call me Simon from now on. Please."

You're stunned for a moment by the sudden show of affection from Simon before wrapping your arms around him and hugging him back.

"Don't worry about it, Simon. I understand completely."

You two stay like that, wrapped up in each other's friendly embrace before a sudden gasp from behind causes your guys' eyes to widen.

"Bloody fookin' hell. I never thought I'd live to see tha day you two finally get along."

You both suddenly pull away and turn to see Johnny standing in the bedroom doorway with two plastic bags in his hands. His blue eyes shone with excitement as he saw the two of you together.

"Johnny, how long were you standing there for?"

"Long enough to hear the lass say they'd be able to pin the holy hell outta ya in a sparring match."

Johnny asks as he sets the bags down on the dresser before going over, climbing onto the bed before putting you and Simon in gentle headlocks, pulling the both of you close to him. You and Simon can't help but share a glance before smiling.

"Hey, Johnny?"

"Yes, lass?"

"I think I'll go ahead and be the surrogate for you two...."

Johnny gasps and looks down at you, completely and utterly thrilled at the news.

"Ya seriously mean that, lass? Really?"

You nod, which causes Johnny's hold on both you and Simon to tighten.

"Oh Gods, Si, ya hear that? You and me...We're gonna be parents!"

Johnny proceeds to let go of you to shower his husband with kisses, all over his face. Simon can only smile and take the onslaught of affection before slightly pulling away.

"Well, hold on now. Not just you and me. Our little dovie here is going to be a parent as well. It just wouldn't be right if we left her out...."

"Wait. Are ya saying what I think yer saying, Si?"

Johnny looks at Simon with hopeful eyes, to which Simon slowly nods.

"Yes, I am....that is, if you still want to-"

Simon is cut off my Johnny pulling you and him back into a hold, showering the both of you with kisses. He eventually pulls a way and runs both his hands through your guys' hair.

"Of course I would still love for that! What a silly question is that, Si? But the question is....does our lassie want that as well?"

Johnny looks over to you as you nod.

"Yeah, I do. I think we could make this work."

"Gods....I don't know what ta say, lass. Just....thank you."

Johnny pulls you in for another hug as Simon watches with a content smile. You had both him and Johnny to keep you safe. Knowing that and the fact you knew self defense made him feel a lot better about this. For the first time in a long time, Simon felt content and happy without a worry in the world. It felt like nothing could touch the three of you.

"Alright, alright. Now, who's hungry? I got us some Chinese from the shop that just opened a couple weeks ago. Lass, you got the fried rice and General Tao's chicken. Laddie, you got the chow mein and sushi"

Simon jumps off the bed without a word, dashing to the food Johnny had set down on the dresser earlier.

"Hell yeah. Thanks, love. I'm starving."

You and Johnny couldn't help but laugh a little as Simon hurriedly went and got his food before rushing back to the living room. Johnny grabs your hand gently and helps you off the bed before going over to hand you your food. Then the two of you head out to the living room where Simon was....only to be met with a pissed of groan shortly after.

"Goddamn it....Manchester lost the damn match!"

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A/N: Sorry for how long this was. It was practically just a thing on Ghost's backstory, I know, but I figured it wouldn't hurt since not many people know about his backstory in the first place. I tried remembering what I could from the comics honestly. Been way too long since I've read them and I really should read them again.

Also, I've got a tag list so if you wanna be tagged in the series for when a new part comes out just lemme know! I'll add you to the list 😊

Tags: @blackhawkfanatic

#cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod #cod modern warfare #cod mw3 #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #cod x reader #cod ghost #ghost x reader #ghost x you #ghost x soap #soap modern warfare #soap mactavish #soap x reader #soap x ghost #ghoap au #ghoap x reader #ghoap fic

[ikamigami]

Even if Sun is doing better I'm sure that what's happening now will take a great toll on him..

Also people say that Sun is past his trauma which honestly I doubt.. or maybe it's just that I'm really upset that Sun never said anything about his trauma on his own.. and that we didn't see him heal from his trauma even one bit..

Sun never had any meaningful conversations about his past and trauma - cause we can't call him saying "yeah", "I don't know" or "uhh" or just being silent as a conversation because conversation require talking (sharing thoughts and feelings on both sides of conversation which never happened with Sun).. and let's be honest Sun wasn't talking about it at all and because of that how he was able to heal?

I would find it quite odd if what's happening now won't affect Sun.. especially considering that Sun probably has depressive psychosis (he even said recently that he was psychotic last year).

I wouldn't be surprised if it triggered Sun's delusions and could even lead to another psychotic episode (break).

I wouldn't be surprised if Sun ended up blaming himself for what is happening with Moon right now due to delusions.

And I'd love to see Sun's mental health problems which are caused majorly by trauma from Old Moon's abuse and July 16th incident and other stressful events in his life be finally addressed properly.

Because when if not now? Now when Moon acts similarly to Old Moon which definitely reminds Sun of his trauma. And now when we know that Dazzle is July 16th victim and wants to apologize to Sun for causing him to snap (poor kid QwQ). I think that if they won't address any of this now then they won't do it ever. Because addressing it in some other time later will lost its meaning and impact.

For me this is what will determine whether show cares about Sun's character or not.

It isn't fair to Sun's character to say that he healed from awful trauma and abuse and psychotic disorder so quickly and it happened completely off-screen.

I still have a hope. But I'm slightly upset that others people don't have any problem with that.

I get it that they don't relate to Sun but to other characters.

And it's easy for them to say that people like me are annoying for complaining about it when their favourite characters get better treatment in the show. It's really easy to complain about annoying fans when you get what you want.

I wish people could see it from different perspective. I think that I'm not asking for too much.

#sun and moon show #sams #sams sun #tw psychotic episode #tw trauma #tw abuse

[fuutaprotectionsquad]

you guys ever think about how. how in the beginning of Milgram, Jackalope was like "you can vote however you want, you can vote someone innocent just because you think they're pretty. it doesn't matter." And despite how hard we (or atleast me, but i imagine most of us) try to vote objectively and not succumb to the bias he expects of us, we do. Our votes are all biased because fundamentally, law and sin itself is built off of emotion, which is the root of bias.

And thats what causes such a debate in the Milgram fandom over verdicts: bc even though we think we're thinking logically, we're not, we are biased. Our biases don't overlap, though, and thats why we can't agree with each other. And on top of that, we are rigid in our biases. We are stubborn, we refuse to see subjective things from other points of view, because we can't. Opinions are hard as fuck to change.

Hence why the Amane debate, despite infuriating me, is subsequently my favorite. Neither side is right or wrong, no matter how much I think I'm right or other ppl think they're right. Its subjective what age is too young to be held accountable for your crimes, its subjective whether or not you should be blamed for the abusive ideologies you were raised under. And I could rant all day about why I believe one thing or the other, and I can get really mad at people who disagree, but its subjective. Just as the sole fact that Amane's cult teaching are bad is also subjective. Murder being bad is subjective.

People trying to change the prisoners' opinions using their verdicts is biased just as voting them based on our own opinions is also biased. We are trying to force our own beliefs and opinions on prisoners who have different ideas of whats right and wrong.

Es cannot see any of this. Most of the prisoners do. We see it mostly with Yuno, Fuuta, Amane and Kotoko, who criticize/take advantage of Es' god complex. Meanwhile, Haruka and Mahiru invite Es to decide for them (i think haruka does??? i dont fully remember). Muu and Shidou are both initially opposed to it, but become more willing to follow Es' verdicts because it benefits them. Even though Shidou's a little hesitant to see himself as innocent, he starts to. Kazui attributes Es' verdicts to a lack of knowledge on his situation, with the ideology that only his opinion on it matters, because he's the only one who knows the full story. Mikoto's kinda just confused (understandably). And don't ask about John idr.

Anyway I could rant for hours about how the specific prisoners act towards Es in regards to their verdicts + milgram fans' voting ideology + the philosophical undertones of milgram. Technically i did cuz this took 2 hours to write. But. maybe another day.

#this was a shower thought #and then i spent way too long typing it #i actually think about this topic a concerning amount tho #milgram #milgram project #what else do i tag

[talesofsorrowandofruin]

WIP Questionnaire Tag

Thanks for tagging me, @space-writes! :D

I'll do this for The Power and the Glory:

What is the first part of your WIP that you created?: The idea of a necromancer accidentally causing the zombie apocalypse. All of the other elements came later (and then tried to take over the original idea...)

If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?: Something catchy but spooky. Khachaturian's Masquerade Waltz, maybe.

What are your favourite characters that you made? Why?: Ilaran and Lian. They're both morally ambiguous and have done some outright villainous things, so predictably I like them best :D

What other pieces of media do you think your fan base would share?: The Untamed (because necromancy), I guess

What has been your biggest struggle with your WIP?: Getting the characters to do what I want instead of taking the plot in a new and weird direction *glares at them*

Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!: There aren't many ordinary animals, but there are immortals who can shapeshift into animals (snakes, sea serpents, a dragon, a phoenix...). These transformations tend to happen at inconvenient times if the shapeshifter isn't used to them. And they aren't always helpful -- Ilaran is afraid of heights but turns into an eagle.

How do your characters get around? (Ex. Trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.): Mostly on foot or by horses. For longer journeys they take either the train or the airship. And for travelling to another planet they use spaceships.

What part of your WIP are you working on right now?: Currently planning book five. I got a few chapters done then got distracted, so I just need to pick up where I left off.

What aspects (tropes, maybe) of your WIP do you think will draw people in?: Probably the zombie apocalypse. But people who come for it will have to wait a long time before it gets started ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

What are your hopes for your WIP?: To finish it, then to edit it, and finally to publish it.

Tagging @lychhiker-writes, @finickyfelix, @the-golden-comet, and anyone else who wants to do this! :D

#tag game #writing #my WIPs #WIP: necromancer

[levaagrace]

I’m really just. Wracking my brain, trying to figure out how to effectively write Jon apologizing to the others for his existence without making them have to bear the burden of forgiving and or comforting him. I dunno. I just want to find a way for him to regain his humanity in their eyes but considering how selfish it is of him to put that on them I’m just not finding out how, y’know?

It’s a conundrum to be sure.

#cause that’s what they and the fans want right? #thinking about it is the final episode considered ‘redemption equals death’? or redemption in death? whatever? #cause didn’t he fix the mistake he made by surviving the unknowing? #anyway #call me lox and bagels the way I’m salty #i’m not tagging this #I said I wouldn’t do that anymore #and this isn’t actually in response to anything so I’m comfortable putting it on my blog just for MEEEEEE #no but genuinely #I am trying to write a fic like that #they want Jon to be beat to a pulp by the women he hurt and I just want to give the people what they want #without actually having them beat him to a pulp and without centering it on his trauma and pain #cause god knows men don’t get to have trauma or pain in the same way as women do #cause all it does is make them monsters who would do horrible things to women #and women can’t also be perpetrators of violence and abuse so #at least according to the fandom