#but then i started a new book we just got in at work

[callingbridgerton]

"Colin didn't earn Penelope."

Ummmmm.

Okay. So, let's just start by saying that Colin Bridgerton did nothing wrong by simply not feeling the same way about Penelope for so long. I am so serious. Even if he never returned her feelings, he wouldn't have done something wrong. But that's not the story we're watching. They're meant for each other, but he didn't know that. That is not wrong of him.

He has done only one thing wrong, ever (to Penelope): give into his insecurities, alter his true self, and give way to a fake version of himself that wants to be accepted by the wrong people and make a hurtful comment to "the boys" about her.

Which he apologized for the moment he knew she knew. It is sad, indeed, that he didn't realize on his own how hurtful that was but even if he had, given that he didn't know she knew, what purpose would there be in him going "uh, I made a really mean comment about you recently and I feel bad about it." Like what? That'd be harder to come back from than how it actually played out.

Now, I don't even want to talk about this because it annoys me how annoyed people are and I have seen it calming down but I think this is worth saying. Some people, I know, are really frustrated with Colin visiting brothels and having "experiences" on his travels. Especially those that have read the books (I haven't.) I know that people were attached to Virgin!Colin, but since I never even thought about that I just didn't care. Show Colin has not offended me, it is not my favorite thing in the world but I think people's primary problem with it is that they wanted Colin and Pen to be on the same exact page when they got together (virgins.) That's very cute and sweet as an idea but show Colin lives in a time period that does not at all expect that of him and in fact expects the opposite. In his quest to take on a new persona he attempts meaningless sex as well but we are shown over and over again that he's just not that into it. He's so confused, he knows it's "supposed" to work for him (as it does/did for his brothers and friends) but it just doesn't.

I also think a lot of people have a problem with it simply because they consider him promised to Penelope when he is not. He just isn't (even though he is.) But he didn't know that!!! He had literally no idea. He didn't cheat on her, he didn't break a promise, he didn't do anything wrong. He was just trying to figure himself out.

In reality, Colin has done nothing but be exceedingly kind to Penelope. A true friend. He has shown nothing but reverence for her all throughout season 1 and 2. And 3. He earned her through being her friend, the only one who truly listens to her and notices her bright mind and kind heart and warm soul. He is literally the only one. Eloise, maybe, but tbh she doesn't truly realize how amazing Pen is (IMO).

Colin didn't need to do anything else. He apologized for his mistakes and showed through actions how much he meant it.

He has earned her since the day they met.

#colin bridgerton #bridgerton #polin #penelope featherington #colin x penelope

[thehypotensivegrad]

The Adviser (27/45) | Bechloe Mafia AU

Synopsis:

Beca Bella, the consigliere and adoptive daughter of the former boss of a powerful Italian mafia, seeks to deliver her own personal brand of justice against a powerful and corrupt business conglomerate and their devilish counsel, while working on reclaiming her hidden wealth confined within the old Barden Tower. Thankfully, she has the help of her right-hand woman and bodyguard, and an old friend with secrets of his own. But things are easier said than done. Especially when she has to win over the trust of the tower’s quirky and colorful tenants, confront the ghosts of a past she left behind, as well as deal with her unexpected but ever-growing feelings for a fierce and determined lawyer she meets along the way.

Can Beca accomplish her goals, find her treasure, and keep the woman she loves in her life?

Or will something have to give for Beca to topple her enemies, climb the ranks of her world, and become the new boss of the Bella family?

Chapter 27: Paper Company Shake Up

All hands on deck as Beca, Chloe, and the rest of the Barden Tower residents work on getting the dirt that would bury Chicago for good.

Chapter preview below - Read the rest at ao3

"What?" Chloe asked rather innocently. Beca's response was to simply look her up and down before giving Chloe a sympathetic look. "You're dressed casually," Chloe pointed out. Beca was wearing a chic grey sweater, the materials it was made from and the tag on in probably cost more than Chloe's whole ensemble. In her arms, neatly folded, hung a cream-colored blazer that paired well with her cream-colored pants. Chloe wasn't sure what they were made off but they both looked sleek, stylish, and comfortable. The shoes Chloe already knew were expensive. It was a brand she didn't know off, but the insignia had caught her attention – Loro Piana – and it was enough to prompt Chloe to look it up before. Beca kept the make-up and accessories simple, with her hair styled back. This was casual for Beca. Not undercover, regular street clothes casual. But her own personal level of casual, one that screamed affluence over anything else.

Chloe on the other hand was wearing her favorite black suite and skirt ensemble that she wore to court a few times now. "I look good in this," Chloe insisted.

"I know, but… Look, Chloe. We're replacing a man and a woman, one of whom had the audacity to book the entire gallery for a private affair for two, I think it's safe to assume it's a date. And if one of them is rich enough to make private art gallery dates a thing…" Beca started to explain.

"This really won't pass?" Chloe asked.

Beca looked at her wristwatch. "We still have time, and I know just the place, come on."

"Just the place for what?" Chloe had asked. But Beca didn't answer.

Instead, they found themselves in Beca's car, with Beca driving silently to some chic, invitation only type of boutique Chloe didn't even know existed. Beca had a light smile on her lips, looking a little proud of herself. When they got there, she had explained that she called ahead of time – so she already planned this from the start, Chloe thought to herself – before Chloe found herself whisked off into a dressing room to try out a few pre-selected outfits for her.

Chloe tried very hard not to chuckle, every time she had to march out and gauge Beca's reaction, "modelling" the outfits she had picked out for her.

Beca was fairly easy to read in that instance. Chloe knew she wasn't convinced every time she pressed her lips together and quirked an eyebrow, and so Chloe would march back and try the next one. Meanwhile Beca was busy looking at whatever was in the black velvety boxes brought out to her by the shop's attendants.

When Chloe stepped out with the third to the last of her pre-selected outfits on – a she knew she had found a lovely black dress with a black blazer that hugged around her figure just right – she knew she found the winner. Beca looked speechless for a minute before she motioned for one of the sales attendants to come back with a big black velvet box. Beca gingerly picked up the necklace inside. The chains were made of gold and attached to the intricate design of the pendant. Beca walked up behind Chloe and placed the necklace around her neck, careful not to touch Chloe directly. Chloe could pick up the scent of Beca's perfume, a delicate mix of floral scents. There was a softness to it that Chloe paired with the elegant yet soft casual style that Beca had for the night. Chloe couldn't help herself blush a little. It almost felt like this fake date was real.

A part of her wished it was.

Beca hummed her approval as soon as she clasped it close, proud of her own choices. The sales attendant walked up to Beca, the box still open. That's how Chloe saw the pair of earrings that matched the pendant of the necklace. Chloe's fingers briefly brushed against Beca's own as she reached for one of the earrings inside the box, sending electricity from where they momentarily touched racing through her veins, down her pulse, throughout her own being.

"Are you sure about this?" Chloe asked with a gulp, trying to squash the butterflies that were starting to wake in stir inside of her. "You're spending quite a lot for one 'date.' This might be too much."

Beca shook her head. "Not at all," she replied before looking away. She watched as Chloe put the earrings on herself. "They were made you," Beca then said rather awkwardly, turning around and walking on away before urging Chloe to follow her out.

This was bad, they have a mission to complete, but Chloe couldn't help but notice how they were both acting like teenagers

Still, a part of Chloe's mind was indulging in maybes and fantasies. Of how things would have been if she had met Beca in a different circumstance.

Beca briefly smiled and let Chloe put the earrings on by herself. Chloe kept looking back at her through the mirror but Beca's expression had become unreadable in that moment. She couldn't help but wonder if her – well, their – beloved consigliere shared the same thoughts as her.

#pitch perfect #bechloe fanfic #chloe beale #beca mitchell #bechloe fanfiction #bechloe mafia au #bechloe #bechloe vincenzo au #fake dating #fake date

[allylikethecat]

hii i was just wondering when you were going to update make way for ducklings

Hello! I am hoping to have a new chapter up either tonight or tomorrow! It is currently in the works and going through a few minor (that knowing me could become major) rewrites! Poor Fictional!Matty just really seems to make things difficult for himself (and me apparently!) Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy the new chapter once it's up!

❤️Ally

#allylikethecat #ask ally #anon ask #fanfiction #matty healy rpf #matty healy fanfiction #the 1975 rpf #make way for ducklings #mpreg #matty healy mpreg #I wanted to have the chapter done yesterday #but then i started a new book we just got in at work #and i havent been able to put it down #I keep gasping and going OH MY GOD #im almost done with it though and will then be able to fully return to our scheduled programing #and i have to be up at 4 tomorrow to ride before it gets hot so i have no crazy plans despite it being a saturday night haha

[earlgreybocchan]

Lost my original post of this from the other day but I genuinely don't understand how Black Butler discourse ever shifted into the does Sebastian ~really~ like Ciel or is Ciel just dinner line of conversation that is pervasive as it is because Sebastian is the one that has absorbed his whole existence into Ciel's. Sebastian's face is what Ciel wants Sebastian's whole purpose is doing things for Ciel Sebastian's every hell of a butler yes my lord speech is about how he's Ciel's and Ciel is the one going around saying shit like whatever Sebastian is just my pawn 💅

#like sjdjdkdd?????? #it's not that i don't think ciel loves sebastian per se bc. well. i don't think he'd ever process it in terms like that no matter what... #...kind of relationship they have bc the most important thing to him is getting him to do tasks like a dog and proving he will over and over #which is why sebastian does it all so overkill #but the most acknowledgement you ever get that ciel likes sebastian is stuff like idk the fucking book of atlantic you did good today #or if we're feeling really crazy the you were the only demon there line #like the dynamic has gotten way skewed in fandom away from the actual text #and i know why but it's still annoying bc i am not even saying this in a shippy way bc i don't give a fuck about ships #but they're so crazy entwined and in completely incomparable inhuman situations that it literally has no merit on this story to sit and... #...definitely piece together how this relationship works with real life normie standards like it literally is going to fit into no box of... #...what we think of as friends or siblings or parents or partners bc no victorian guy on the face of the earth has a real pet demon. #it's so boring you're missing the bigger picture that they're everything to each other and completely stuck together forever #does x mean y mean z? (least problematic answer only) they're stuck together! forever! #and no one has demons in real life it's all comparable to real life nothing #other than the asthma that's real #anyway. it's like fandom has made up a version of this story in their heads that is so devoid of anything that makes the story the story #twitter is like another planet for this i am mostly talking about twitter where i have been looking for news about the anime and oh boy #i have said this before but sebastian doesn't have a grip on human relationships bc he's not one and ciel doesn't give a fuck #but like this post started with and strayed from. well. sebastian isn't even trying to act like he's indifferent. ciel actually is. #and we're all missing several funny bits from that just trying to fit everything into a box #we could have more interesting conversations if we got past the same three people have been having for 20 years #kuroshitsuji #my kuro posts

[kyouka-supremacy]

Mmmhh...

#(Basically rant on my last two posts) #I know I've said it before and sorry for coming off as annoying– #but I really wish we still had a central bsd blog on Tumblr like fy-bungoustraydogs or bsd-central or things of the kind. #I think now everyone rushes to post news first. And although there's merit to it in knowing news as soon as they happen‚ #in the long run the death of this kind of central official content ***fan*** blogs is such a huge loss of fandom spaces‚ #especially for the archiving purposes they solved. Especially today that T/witter and G/oogle have basically become unusable. #Literally. Literally. I've been doing official content archiving since I was 11 #(because that's the very specific kind of mental illness I have) #and let me tell you that the quality of web search and especially reverse image search only got worse– #in a way that is very evident and noticeable. Which is crazy tbh and not how things should work. #If anyone would like to start a bsd-central kind of blog I'll be the first one to follow. #Actually if anyone actually wants to establish it feel free to contact me and I'll be more than happy to share the resources I have!!!! #It just needs to be something multi-modded for a series of reasons I won't get into right now #I just can't personally do it (not as main admin at least) because that would be modding my FIFTH active bsd blog– #and that's a little too much even for me. #On top of some ethical concerns I have regarding whether it'd be fair for me to mod a fandom central bsd blog– #when I feel like I can't genuinely share the same amount of love for the franchise other fans share #On top of. You know. Getting a degree eventually hopefully. #Then years after the blog has been solidly enstablished and aquired enough credibility it could even open a free donations found to invest– #in buying and scanning and releasing bsd content that hasn't been shared yet like the guidebooks or illustration books or everything else– #for everyone to see... #The dream. (Is realistically never going to happen) (Won't stop me from daydreaming about it every day) #((Still salty I couldn't afford the guidebooks only due to the shipment prices. I *would* have scanned and uploaded them.)) #That was a long and idealistic rant. Kyotag out #Edit: *Modding my SIXTH bsd blog #Apparently I mod so many blogs I lost count of them

[seilon]

i got like three different compliments from people today on my customer service and im not gonna lie I greatly enjoy feeling like im winning at Restaurant Host

#two from guests one from newly promoted manager #i find it kinda funny when I get props from people for squeezing their reservation in or changing it without complaint or just doing #whatever in order to get them seated/reserved/etc despite whatever circumstances come up just cause like #it comes off as caring customer service which isn’t totally Wrong or anything #but I’m not trying to go above and beyond or anything at all generally. in my brain its just like. #restaraunt tetris. autistic little game in my head where I try to make everyone fit into a floorplan and update things accordingly and take #on new problems to solve and so on #I wish it was busier more often so I could actually Do this more often and like. use my autistic powers like this #cause when it’s not busy I’ve Hardly got anything to do on this front and I either get painfully bored or start stealing other peoples jobs #im. half joking there #anyway excited for thanksgiving cause in addition to 1.5x holiday pay we also hav fucking 90 people booked in the span of three hours #which will be chaotic as hell but hehehehehehe NO BOREDOM FOR ME #now THAT’s restaraunt tetris. I keep looking at the floorplan for that day and just being baffled by it because it’s. a lot #anyway. idk why im journaling like this I guess I just don’t talk to people enough irl outside of work #kibumblabs

[yotd2009]

it's 2023 and i'm still bitter about how kuroshitsuji, a complex slow burn mystery manga, got absolutely massacred by its shitty semi-episodic shota/fujobait anime adaptation

#like yeah the manga could be a bit questionable in the earlier parts (cough corset scene cough comedic relief grelle + soma & agni cough) #but almost all of that got retconned once yana toboso was allowed to have more creative freedom over her work #(and her editor's interference is something we Know had a p drastic effect on the series bc it Literally Gave Us Grelle (toboso wanted to #have a female jack the ripper but her editor said that if she did then she would've had to be working w a man. so in response toboso #decided that madam red's partner in crime would be as effeminate as possible so grelle was created in the vein of buffalo bill and then #only in her next appearance a few arcs later when the book of murder arc was over and done with was she acknowledged to be a trans woman #not the best situation for girlie overall but the manga started treating her much better over time + she slayed) #but the anime was on a whole different level s1 Literally ended while teasing a kiss between a grown adult and a 12 year old #and then s2 just made up random bullshit including a brand new 14 year old to ship bait w adults #and it doesn't help that whenever the series comes up everyone in the surrounding area becomes 50x more susceptible to false info #(see: undertaker's real name being shared around on an image that's literally watermarked by a TUMBLR HEADCANONS BLOG) #so there's a p decent subset of ppl who believe it was originally meant to be a yaoi (rumor that began from the same hc blog) #or that yana toboso is a shotacon (pr.osh.ippers on twt made that one up to try and win arguments) #i want the series to get the fmab treatment w a shiny new anime made by some1 other than a-1 pictures #bc we've seen what happens when they try and adapt the arcs that came out after they committed to the random bullshit plots of s1-2 #in the form of the book of murder circus & atlantic ovas. which are excessively plain and just streamlined disconnected and heartless #renditions of the manga arcs which will make no sense to anyone who hasn't already read it. they're like ufotable's fate route ova but at #least that has higher production values and is somewhat visually interesting #romeo.txt

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: April 15

"Something in the Way She Moves" by James Taylor

#song of the day #it's been two weeks + two days since the last song of the day #the issue is you see that I started the songs up again in December because my insomnia was fucking up my perception of time #and I wanted some kind of regular marker to help me keep track #and then what happened two weeks + two days ago is that I lost all track of time and subsequently the songs of the day failed #I'm gonna see if I can keep up again for a bit now that I've re-restarted without an alarm on my phone #but if I miss any this week I'll just give in and turn the alarm back on #updates from the last two weeks are going to sound so chaotic let's see #I got a new project at work /and/ I got demoted /and/ I got added to a higher access level /and/ I'm in charge of a new database #yes all of those things together. I'm to be an accountant now! not instead but in addition to my other stuff. should be interesting #I didn't get April Fools off like I was scheduled to because all my scheduled vacation got unapproved #(I was here for about twenty nonsequential minutes to boop people and I'm glad I made time for it. extremely fun to boop) #I lied shamelessly to get eclipse day off and we went on a full-day roadtrip and it was wonderful. everything I dreamed and more #I killed one of my baby succulents through clumsiness and rabbits ate my pea plants but my sage and cabbages look promising #got a massive pot of mint flourishing on my porch and the horseradish is gorgeous #got Duncan lights and plants and a filter system for his frog tank but we haven't set up the substrate yet #so there's just potted plants sitting inside a terrarium. very amusing honestly #I've been playing a little Stardew and eating a /lot/ of hot sauce and tofu #drinking tons of klass aguas frescas--especially the soursop one. holy shit is it good. the mango and hibiscus also #and these past few days I've been sleeping better #for most of those two weeks I was getting a handful of twenty-minute naps each workday and then crashing unwillingly on the weekend #I haven't read any comic books since February :'( this weekend we're going to costco and then I'm reading comics until Monday #what have y'all been up to? I've missed being around #edit: oh shit the actual song part. anyway this is James Taylor! makes me happy and helps me settle. good vibes songs #I'm half-panicked about work all the time recently and then also today was tax day (Nick's taxes. blegh) #James Taylor doing some heavy lifting round here

[absoloutenonsense]

.

#I started a basic coding course today #its online but it does have due dates and interactive parts each week which is great for me #I am not a great self-starter and we gotta work with our brains #but just thinking about my motivations to do this and obvi I am interested in it and learning something new is good #and I’ve learned over the past six months that I need some consistency/security to make me happy so I’ve got a job change again in my futur #(and being on a schedule that is different from so many of my friends has been tough) #But another more unexpected reason is that there are things I wanna do? things that often cost money and I just wanna be able to say #Hey you also wanna do this thing I wanna do? Great I’ve booked it let’s go! #But isn’t that the dream for so many of us to just like not worry about money #so maybe I’ve learned nothing new lol #but anyway the class intro seemed good so let’s hope it all goes well 🤞✌️

[bootyful-seventeen]

Quick question for the homies who have a bookshelf to display their kpop albums and/or mangas and figures, what kind of method or style do you like?

#rn everything is mostly being put up like a regular bookshelf for the mangas and books and the albums are kinda going horizontal & vertical #it’s mostly dependant on the size of the albums or the actual shelf part cuz I got the billy bookcase so it’s not all evenly spaced apart #the very top is big enough to fit my largest albums & lightstick and I was thinking of maybe realigning it once I got the short bookcase #tho that might have to wait a bit until I spontaneously rearrange my room after the new year starts #and maybe clean out my closet and put the few things in my wardrobe in there so I could dismantle it and put it in storage #cuz honestly living with 2 closet spaces since 2016/2017 for 1 room that wasn’t being shared between me and my sister is not the best idea #my dad had at the time cuz that closet is pretty much the section for work clothes now 💀💀 #and the closet only has maybe 25% space used on the hanger since I did put some of the other clothes away in a fabric storage thingy #which is where I mostly stuck the pants/shorts/skirts I couldn’t hang up #but yeah back to the book case cuz now that I’m 23 I wanna commit to my idea of expanding the virgin corner into the virgin wall lmao #maybe ask my dad if we could hook up the extra tv we have once the vision came to be #so yeah dk y’all have a certain way of displaying especially if you have an album or book cover you really liked? #or how you also might place some figures and acrylics cuz I just feel like idk what I’m doing even if I do look at other people’s set up #or even shelf arrangement cuz my friend said it was an adhd nightmare to find something when she needed to look for something #and it was on my shelf just two levels down from her eye level from where she sat😅

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

#spilled ink #warm up #“why did u tag it warm up” bc i wrote it off the cuff while drinkin coffee lol #btw the 30 dollar buy in for the dog walking is bc they pay the organizer a small pittance so she can #run fb ads and stuff and like she does put in a lot of work i don't mind paying her #but that's exactly what im fucking talking about like. #ppl can't afford to volunteer their time anymore and we all understand it!!! everything costs money for everyone! #like we didn't have to use to say ''do you mind paying me back for the stuff we ate'' #we used to be able to afford to feed our friends once in a while!!!

[nerdie-faerie]

This has got to be the worst move out yet

#packing perils #student living #Uni shenanigans #ace is a mess #oh my god. okay so we start on Tuesday ive been gradually moving my stuff over to my friends house #cus were moving in together in September and shes staying in her place over the summer so well have everything in one place to move in #so take some stuff over to hers on tuesday before her shift then we walk to work together i collect her keys and say bye #go back to mine pack up some more stuff warned her i planned on doing 2 trips while she was working so start figuring out whats going #end up with two tote bags a crate a box and a large bag of boxes decide ill take the heavier tote bag and the box on the first trip #as i cant really carry much else with the box due to its awkward size even though its not particularly heavy and cut through the park to #shave off some time feel pretty good when i get there it wasnt unbareable esp after Saturday when carrying 4 heavy shopping bags ended up #covering me in bruises and scratches and messing my back shoulder and neck up so i feel like underestimated myself on this trip and like i #can take everything on the next trip well its already late in the day cus my mate does evening shift so by time i get back its half 9 so i #decide to cut through the park again to save time but the large shopping bag with my saucepans casserole dish etc is difficult to carry due #to how bulky it is and the crate tho it has handles is also unwieldy so my arms are being bruised and scratched up i cant waste time carryin #everything back home just to put one thing down at this point but im considering putting the biggest bag down in some overgrown plants in #the park speeding to my mates and coming back for it its a stupid and risky idea but its getting dark the sun is almost completely set and #no matter how often i rest i just cant manage it and my damn brain starts worrying about being murdered so i ditch the bag and i can move #much quicker now so rush to my mates and rush back reassure her as im leaving hers that i am bringin her keys back its just after 11 at this #point cus its over 35 minutes to get to hers i get back to the park in just over 20 my bag is still there! and i dont get attacked get my #stuff to her room then hustle to get to her job before she finishes at 12 get there a few minutes to spare shes not ready to go yet anyway #she tells me shes not comfortable with me walking back in the dark i should stay at hers i cant ive got an assignment so she says shes #walking me to mine then going to her boyfriends 5 mins down the road get back to mine shower have dinner and crank out my Wednesday 4pm #assignment by 7am go to bed get about 2 hours sleep before tge fire alarm is tested and then ive got to be up for a meeting with our new #landlord anyway and ofc its raining come back from our meeting grab food and start packing up some more sht get buses over to hers this time #together come back pack some more hope the rain dies down a bit but it doesnt look like its stopping and i somehow fcked my foot carrying #stuff earlier so she texts a coworker asking if they can pick us up they agree so organise a few more things but then a puddle causes their #car to break down the next bus is in over half hour so mate decides shes gonna run to her boyfriends to charge her phone while we wait for #the next bus to be due while shes gone i finish sorting things she then calls asks me to book a taxi cus the rain has only gotten worse when #taxi arrives realise that student accom is basically flooded deciding what to do while at hers cus the weather is unbareable she goes to get

[holyviolence]

having the most irritating day at work 😊👍

#accidentally stabbed a pin about an inch into my hand!!!! #my boss is annoying as always. blaming us for things that are just not our fault!! #we were double booked back to back for 5 hours straight! im literally only on my lunch break right now because my customer got finished so #fast. otherwise i wouldn't have had time to eat until 1 hour before i have to clock out #and customers are being so annoying today??? this woman was crying because her dress had WRINKLES. ???????? #also my friend is not going to see this so im gonna keep ranting. #she's fed up with working here which i totally get and she interviewed for someplace else and will most likely leave in a couple weeks #which is fine and great because i support her and it is awful working here!!!! #THE THING IS. the only employees in alterations currently are Me and Her and one woman who only comes on Fridays.... #so if my friend (who is the alterations manager too btw) leaves then it's just ME for the entire week. every day. taking appointments and #sewing dress alterations and repairs. and they're not going to give me enough hours to do all that work because im not full time #they're not gonna offer me the full time position i know it. and i wouldn't take it even if they did because i see how they treat my friend #i want to quit too but im not going to just leave them with NO ONE to do alterations. i can't do that to all the customers who already paid #i just don't get why they won't hire anyone else. when i started here there were 4 people working. 2 of them quit at the same time a week #after i started. obviously it sucks here if no one sticks around #we had people interview for these open positions but they didn't get hired!!! #im literally going to lose my mind and cry. this sucks. #it sucks so bad i don't even want to do this as a job anymore. im tired of sewing 😭😭😭 #for other ppl at least. im still making clothes for myself. #(like two days ago one of the new stylists took it upon herself to clean a dress when that is NOT HER JOB!!!! she should not be spraying #chemicals on expensive dresses if she's never done it before!!!!! and also she got our ironing board dirty. and my friend complained to our #boss and our boss was like. at least she showed initiative. you can't get mad for that. #GIRL??? do you hate us. do youHATE us. you stick up for literally everyone else but us. #she acts like im stupid too. i was pressing a seam open and she told me how to use the steam button. I KNOWWW I HAVE USED IRONS BEFORE!! and #i don't need steam for this seam rn 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #fr im so done with this place but im too sympathetic to just quit. in the busy season.

[allinllachuteruteru]

Duolingo is NOT what it used to be.

“Duolingo is ‘sunsetting the development of the Welsh course’ (and many others)”.

I’ve used Duolingo since 2013. It used to be about genuinely learning languages and preserving endangered ones. It used to have a vibrant community and forum where users were listened to. It used to have volunteers that dedicated countless hours and even years to making the best courses they could while also trying to explain extremely nuanced and complex grammar in simple terms.

In the past two years it feels like Von Ahn let the money talk instead of focusing on the original goal.

No one truly had a humongous problem with the subscription tier for SuperDuolingo. We understood it: if you can afford to pay, help keep Duolingo free for those who couldn’t.

It started when the company went public. Volunteers were leaving courses they created because they warned of differing longterm goals compared to Duolingo’s as a company; not long after it was announced that the incubator (how volunteers were able to make courses in the first place) would be shut down. A year goes by and the forums—the voice of the users and the way people were able to share tips and explanations—is discontinued. A year or two later, Duolingo gets a completely new makeover—the Tree is gone and you don’t control what lesson you start with. With the disappearance of the Tree, all grammar notes and explanations for courses not in the Big 8 (consisting of the courses made before the incubator like Spanish/French/German/etc. and of the most popular courses like Japanese/Korean/Chinese/etc.) are removed with it. Were you learning Vietnamese and have no idea how honorifics work without the grammar notes? Shit outta luck bud. Were you learning Polish and have absolutely no clue how one of the declensions newly thrown at you functions? Suck it up. In a Reddit AMA, Von Ahn claims that the new design resulted in more users utilizing the app/site. How he claims that statistic? By counting how many people log into their Duolingo account, as if an entire app renovation wouldn’t cause an uptick in numbers to even see what the fuck just happened to the courses.

Von Ahn announces next in a Reddit AMA that no more language courses will be added from what there already is available. His reasoning? No one uses the unpopular language courses — along with how Duolingo will now be doing upkeep with the courses already in place. And here I am, currently looking on the Duolingo website how there are 1.8 million active learners for Irish, 284 thousand active learners for Navajo, and even 934 thousand active learners for fucking High Valyrian. But yea, no one uses them. Not like the entire Navajo Nation population is 399k members or anything, or like 1.8 million people isn’t 36% of the entire population of Ireland or anything.

And now this. What happened to the upkeep of current courses? Oh, Von Ahn only meant the popular ones that already have infinite resources. Got it. Duolingo used to be a serious foundational resource for languages with little resources while also adding the relief of gamification.

It pisses me off. It really does. This was not what Duolingo started out as. And yea, maybe I shouldn’t get invested in a dingy little app. But as someone who spent most of her adolescence immersed in language learning to the point where it was literally keeping me alive at one point, to the point where languages felt like my only friend as a tween, and to the point where friendships on the Duolingo forums with likeminded individuals my age and other enthusiasts who even sent me books in other languages for free because they wanted people to learn it, the evolution of Duolingo hits a bitter nerve within me.

~End rant.

#duolingo #langblr #huge language rant feel free to skip #evolution of duolingo #luis von ahn #duolingo welsh course #language learning

[burntoutdaydreamer]

Things That May Be Causing Your Writer's Block- and How to Beat Them

I don't like the term 'Writer's Block' - not because it isn't real, but because the term is so vague that it's useless. Hundreds of issues all get lumped together under this one umbrella, making writer's block seem like this all-powerful boogeyman that's impossible to beat. Worse yet, it leaves people giving and receiving advice that is completely ineffective because people often don't realize they're talking about entirely different issues.

In my experience, the key to beating writer's block is figuring out what the block even is, so I put together a list of Actual Reasons why you may be struggling to write:

(note that any case of writer's block is usually a mix of two or more)

Perfectionism (most common)

What it looks like:

You write one sentence and spend the next hour googling "synonyms for ___"

Write. Erase. Write. Rewrite. Erase.

Should I even start writing this scene when I haven't figured out this one specific detail yet?

I hate everything I write

Cringing while writing

My first draft must be perfect, or else I'm a terrible writer

Things that can help:

Give yourself permission to suck

Keep in mind that nothing you write is going to be perfect, especially your first draft

Think of writing your first/early drafts not as writing, but sketching out a loose foundation to build upon later

People write multiple drafts for a reason: write now, edit later

Stop googling synonyms and save that for editing

Write with a pen to reduce temptation to erase

Embrace leaving blank spaces in your writing when you can't think of the right word, name, or detail

It's okay if your writing sucks. We all suck at some point. Embrace the growth mindset, and focus on getting words on a page

Lack of inspiration (easiest to fix)

What it looks like:

Head empty, no ideas

What do I even write about???

I don't have a plot, I just have an image

Want to write but no story to write

Things that can help:

Google writing prompts

If writing prompts aren't your thing, instead try thinking about what kind of tropes/genres/story elements you would like to try out

Instead of thinking about the story you would like to write, think about the story you would like to read, and write that

It's okay if you don't have a fully fleshed out story idea. Even if it's just an image or a line of dialogue, it's okay to write that. A story may or may not come out of it, but at least you got the creative juices flowing

Stop writing. Step away from your desk and let yourself naturally get inspired. Go for a walk, read a book, travel, play video games, research history, etc. Don't force ideas, but do open up your mind to them

If you're like me, world-building may come more naturally than plotting. Design the world first and let the story come later

Boredom/Understimulation (lost the flow)

What it looks like:

I know I should be writing but uugggghhhh I just can'tttttt

Writing words feels like pulling teeth

I started writing, but then I got bored/distracted

I enjoy the idea of writing, but the actual process makes me want to throw my laptop out the window

Things that can help:

Introduce stimulation: snacks, beverages, gum, music such as lo-fi, blankets, decorate your writing space, get a clickity-clackity keyboard, etc.

Add variety: write in a new location, try a new idea/different story for a day or so, switch up how you write (pen and paper vs. computer) or try voice recording or speech-to-text

Gamify writing: create an arbitrary challenge, such as trying to see how many words you can write in a set time and try to beat your high score

Find a writing buddy or join a writer's group

Give yourself a reward for every writing milestone, even if it's just writing a paragraph

Ask yourself whether this project you're working on is something you really want to be doing, and be honest with your answer

Intimidation/Procrastination (often related to perfectionism, but not always)

What it looks like:

I was feeling really motivated to write, but then I opened my laptop

I don't even know where to start

I love writing, but I can never seem to get started

I'll write tomorrow. I mean next week. Next month? Next month, I swear (doesn't write next month)

Can't find the time or energy

Unreasonable expectations (I should be able to write 10,000 words a day, right????)

Feeling discouraged and wondering why I'm even trying

Things that can help:

Follow the 2 min rule (or the 1 paragraph rule, which works better for me): whenever you sit down to write, tell yourself that you are only going to write for 2 minutes. If you feel like continuing once the 2 mins are up, go for it! Otherwise, stop. Force yourself to start but DO NOT force yourself to continue unless you feel like it. The more often you do this, the easier it will be to get started

Make getting started as easy as possible (i.e. minimize barriers: if getting up to get a notebook is stopping you from getting started, then write in the notes app of your phone)

Commit to a routine that will work for you. Baby steps are important here. Go with something that feels reasonable: every day, every other day, once a week, twice a week, and use cues to help you remember to start. If you chose a set time to write, just make sure that it's a time that feels natural to you- i.e. don't force yourself to writing at 9am every morning if you're not a morning person

Find a friend or a writing buddy you can trust and talk it out or share a piece of work you're proud of. Sometimes we just get a bit bogged down by criticism- either internal or external- and need a few words of encouragement

The Problem's Not You, It's Your Story (or Outline (or Process))

What it looks like:

I have no problems writing other scenes, it's just this scene

I started writing, but now I have no idea where I'm going

I don't think I'm doing this right

What's an outline?

Drowning in documents

This. Doesn't. Make. Sense. How do I get from this plot point to this one?!?!?! (this ColeyDoesThings quote lives in my head rent free cause BOY have I been there)

Things That Can Help:

Go back to the drawing board. Really try to get at the root of why a scene or story isn't working

A part of growing as a writer is learning when to kill your darlings. Sometimes you're trying to force an idea or scene that just doesn't work and you need to let it go

If you don't have an outline, write one

If you have an outline and it isn't working, rewrite it, or look up different ways to structure it

You may be trying to write as a pantser when you're really a plotter or vice versa. Experiment with different writing processes and see what feels most natural

Study story structures, starting with the three act structure. Even if you don't use them, you should know them

Check out Ellen Brock on YouTube. She's a professional novel editor who has a lot of advice on writing strategies for different types of writers

Also check out Savage Books on YouTube (another professional story editor) for advice on story structure and dialogue. Seriously, I cannot recommend this guy enough

Executive Dysfunction, Usually From ADHD/Autism

What it looks like:

Everything in boredom/understimulation

Everything in intimidation/procrastination

You have been diagnosed with and/or have symptoms of ADHD/Autism

Things that can help:

If you haven't already, seek a diagnosis or professional treatment

Hire an ADHD coach or other specialist that can help you work with your brain (I use Shimmer; feel free to DM me for a referral)

Seek out neurodiverse communities for advice and support

Try body doubling! There's lot's of free online body doubling websites out there for you to try. If social anxiety is a barrier, start out with writing streams such as katecavanaughwrites on Twitch

Be aware of any sensory barriers that may be getting in the way of you writing (such as an uncomfortable desk chair, harsh lighting, bad sounds)

And Lastly, Burnout, Depression, or Other Mental Illness

What it looks like:

You have symptoms of burnout or depression

Struggling with all things, not just writing

It's more than a lack of inspiration- the spark is just dead

Things that can help:

Forget writing for now. Focus on healing first.

Seek professional help

If you feel like it, use writing as a way to explore your feelings. It can take the form of journaling, poetry, an abstract reflection of your thoughts, narrative essays, or exploring what you're feeling through your fictional characters. The last two helped me rediscover my love of writing after I thought years of depression had killed it for good. Just don't force yourself to do so, and stop if it takes you to a darker place instead of feeling cathartic

#writing #creative writing #writer problems #writing advice #writing community #writing a book #writing problems #novel writing #on writing #writing tips #writing help #writers on tumblr #writers block #female writers #writers of tumblr #writers blog #adhd writer

[a-passing-storm]

I have forgotten that it is actually kind of Therapy Homework for me to post things online!

#this sounds really stupid and questionable i know. but basically. #i have an issue where any time i do Anything i feel the need to tell my friends about it for validation and attention and stuff #which means that when they don't respond immediately i feel shitty and also. when we do have conversations i have nothing to talk about #but online especially here on tumblr i really do not give a shit about it #but like. i still get to get it out and be like “OH MY GOD I DID SOMETHING” #it sounds kind of weird i know but it works for me and it improves my relationships with my friends lol. ideally someday i will not #need to acknowledge Everything I Do like that but for now tumblr is WAY healthier than like spamming my friends lol #so anyway! today i went to a new bookstore in my area and it was GREAT and i added a Ton of books to my list (the classics section!!!) #and also there were some people in the d&D section and i joined in on a convo of theirs abt paladdins. i was kind of awkward about it but #i'm still glad i talked and they seemed pleasantly surprised if slightly amused by the interaction! but like really. it is SO cool #that you can just meet people in public!! and especially that bookstores are sort of... #directly conducive to meeting people with similar interests just based off of how the sections are organized #i got a collection of Poe and a history book #aLSO i went to costco for the first time #and i baked oatmeal raisin cookies! haven't baked since i started high school p much but i'm getting back to it after thanksgiving cooking #and they came out pretty decently! #and i just made like. a cucumber salad kind of. idk what to call it. and i really like it. ya boi is cooking a lot now bc #he remembered how fun it is #anyway! yeah i really need to get back to journaling in general too!!! #dante dicit #journal tag #ig #might delete