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#but like that is very much robert’s son also. it’s just. every day i am forged to see the Most Ridiculous takes. why.
atopvisenyashill · 10 months
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i don’t care that rhaenyra’s oldest are illegitimate not bc i’m a targ stan who thinks she can do no wrong but because legitimacy is a social construct that does nothing more than enforce the patriarchy and class system, and rhaenyra having kids out of wedlock with a man she is consenting to sex with is fine, actually, and if you’re hung up on that it is my opinion that you are clinging to the rules of propriety and patriarchy when analyzing her because you think she should be punished for having sex outside marriage and not like, all the things she actually does that are morally wrong, which is like, textbook misogyny.
“but the lords” so the thing is i don’t give a shit if the lords think she’s a slut. i understand the time period bc not only am i not stupid, i also understand that it is still a big issue in many communities for mothers to have children out of wedlock. i am saying i do not care because it’s a fake issue the way “brienne can’t really be a knight because she’s a woman” and “sansa can’t rule winterfell when she has true born younger brothers” or whatever else. legitimacy is a tool of the patriarchy, of colonialism irl, of classism, and the argument “rhaenyra is a bad person for having children out of wedlock when she knew that would put them in danger” is stupid bc legitimacy doesn’t fucking matter and neither does marriage.
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Purity
Pairings: Hangman x Rooster x Bob x reader
Requested: Hi love! ( Idk I'm allowed to call people that but it's a habit😅)I just wanted to say I absolutely love your work! And I had an amazing idea (or at least I think it is) if it's not to much trouble.Poly Bob x Rooster X Hangman X reader where Rooster suddenly introduced Iceman and Maverick as his parents and the rest of class 86 ( sundown, chipper, slider, wolfman and Hollywood) as his uncles.Suddenly Maverick isn't the chaotic/fun/chill captain anymore but he's all 'so you three think you're good enough to date my son huh'.Then IceMav let the 86 class do some very intimidating and threatening shovel talk and first reader is like 'oh shit' but then she remembers the stories Rooster told them about how sweet and chaotic they are (probably causing chaos with Maverick) and reader starts to respond dryly and sarcastically (totally matching class 86' vibe) and they're like 'yeah she's part of the family now, even if it doesn't work out with Rooster, we're adopting you now' and Bob and Hangman are complete horrified because they are higher ranking officers and Rooster is just laughing his ass off.
A/N: I am going to keep Sundown and Chipper out because I don’t know much about them. Also please like and reblog! I hate to say it but many of us writers don’t want to write anymore because we have no interaction. It feeds the authors.
Warning: Mentions of pregnancy, humor regarding males that were also males at birth not being able to be pregnant.
Don't like it, don't read please
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You stood at the door of the Kazanksy-Mitchell household. “Guys, I promise you it will be fine,” Bradley chuckled, “Its only supposed to be Iceman and Maverick today,” He continued. You looked at him suspiciously, “Then why are there multiple vehicles here Bradley?” You asked, face deadpanned. “I said supposed to, doesn’t mean it is,” he said with a nervous chuckle. He truthfully did not know that his 'uncles' we're supposed to be there as well. Despite being in his thirties, they always have and always will be protective over 'baby goose'.
Just as Bob and Jake went to comment, the door open and there stood Iceman, Maverick, Slider, Hollywood, and Wolfman. “Bradley!” Maverick exclaimed with a big grin, pulling him into a hug before a more serious look took over his face when looking at Jake, Robert, and you, “Lts. Seresin, Floyd, L/n,” He acknowledged with a nod. Gone was the fun loving captain you all saw every day at training, in his place was a protective father figure. “Captain Mitchell,” You said politely, “Admiral Kazansky,” You continued before acknowledging the rest by their proper ranks. They were truthfully impressed that you had taken the time to memorize that without them being in uniform, you had never personally met them before. It also show you actually listened to Bradley when he told you things because they gave him no time to prepare you all for the meeting with them.
“Please, come in,” Iceman said, his whole body stiff as you four entered the house. You all entered the house, backs straight, and heads raised, showing no fear. You all were falling into a military mindset as you began to go to the dinner table after being instructed. It was going to be like you were in the academy again, you had to show no weakness while also being respectful.
You all sat down, tension filling the air that was so thick you could cut it with a knife. At first it was silent, all of you complimenting the food but you three knew better then to speak. When the group wanted to start the conversation, they would.
Maverick suddenly straightened up, “So, you three think you’re good enough to date Rooster, huh?” he asked, looking directly at you three. “Sir-” Robert started but Maverick held up his hand, “We all have a few questions for you and your intentions with him,” Slider said, jaw tight.
Right then and there, you knew exactly what they were doing. It was like a bad romcom, ‘Are you planning to take her purity?’, and in this case, it was Bradley.
"Please, ask away Admiral Kerner," You said easily, a smile falling onto your face. They wanted to play games? You would play back. These men needed to know you could hold your own and for Rooster as well. You also recalled they had a sense of humor and would appreciate that. While you would be extremely respectful towards them, you also had to crack jokes and be yourself, if you couldn't with his most trusted family then you weren't really in it for the long run.
"Let's begin then," Wolfman said, leaning forward arms just resting on the table but not his elbows to show manners still. "Your plans for the future with baby Goose?" He asked. "Well sir, we plan a very long future with him," Jake said, clearing his throat. Anyone you see the twitch in his jaw from his nerves, you also could see Bob shifting as they tried to watch their words.
"Marriage? Kids?" Hollywood pushed, wanting more of an answer from you three. "Well sir, we will all probably get hitched in Vegas," you said dryly, "Elvis officiating the wedding of course," you continued straight faced. Robert stomped on your foot, "Y/n!" He hissed before glancing at the Admirals to apologize for your behavior but stopped short as he saw the reactions. Iceman let out a snort, the others lips were twitching as they tried to not laugh, recalling Goose saying about some of them getting married in Vegas.
"And the children?" Mav asked, trying to not laugh. "Well there is the natural way but I don't think they have the parts to carry," you joked with a shrug, waving your hand to your boyfriends who were very much born male. "But if we were maybe one or two but I don't pressure," you said, tone light and a grin on your face.
They were starting to relax with you, leaning back in their seats. "And your overall intentions?" Iceman asked. "Well sir," you said, folding your hands respectfully, "I have no intention of stealing your son's purity if that is what you're worried about," you grinned, leaving it in the air with the silent 'Though he doesn't have any', "But my intention is to keep him for a very long time. Although I won't be making him into a pretty little housewife," you smirked.
That set them off rolling as Rooster flushed in embarrassment. "Okay okay, we can't break gentlemen!" Hollywood chuckled. "So," he started turning the attention to your other boyfriends.
The rest of the night you continued with joking responses while also showing that you deeply loved Bradley and intended to give him the world. The entire time, Bradley was laughing hysterically as you responded with quick comebacks and humor, you were a little spitfire apparently.
The whole time, Jake and Robert resembled fish and ghosts at the same time. These were Admirals of all high ranking! Not only could they convince Bradley to break up with you three, but they could also make their lives extremely miserable within the military. It honestly freaked them out even more when they all responded positively to your humor.
It was later that night, you were sitting and joking with Hollywood and Wolfman about a ‘hard on’ comment they made back in Top Gun. Slider and Iceman approached Bradley, placing their hands on his shoulders. “We like her definitely,” Iceman grinned, “She is part of this family now even if you break up with her,” Slider chuckled. You turned your head towards them as they called your name, “Y/n, you have officially been adopted by the class of 86!” He continued with a laugh. “Robert, Jake, lighten up. We aren’t that scary... we just needed to test you,” Iceman smiled.
They spent the time getting Jake and Robert to relax, watching as you four interacted the whole night. They knew baby goose found his people.
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sunstar706 · 4 months
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Hear me out: Bucky Barnes is 100% not Jewish.
I’ve been doing a lot of scrolling on Tumblr/Ao3 the past few days looking for other people’s opinions on the nitty gritty of Bucky Barnes’ background, and realized- a lot (a *lot*) of people headcanon him as Jewish, which I find really interesting. Judaism, on the whole, is an extremely interesting subject, as the only non-universalizing Abrahamic faith, the only ethnic Abrahamic faith, and the oldest Abrahamic faith (making it one of the oldest monotheistic religions ever to exist).
Let me present to you my speculation on Bucky’s religious background. First of all, we know Steve is Catholic. Just getting that out of the way.
Am I a geography and demography nerd? Yes, yes I am. And I also have a strange hyperfixation on names. That’s why this stood out to me immediately.
James Buchanan Barnes, born March 10, 1917, into a poor family in Brooklyn, New York.
James is a really ambiguous name, with versions in pretty much every Indo-European language, as far as I know. It’s the number one baby boy name in the United States of all time, beating out the second place name (Robert) by over 300,000. Honestly, this name tells me nothing. Moving on.
Buchanan. It’s Scottish. That says a lot. It was fairly common at the time for the eldest sons middle name to be the mothers maiden name, so we can safely say that Winnifred Barnes (née Buchanan) was most likely Scottish.
Now, this is where we get historical, and also where speculation starts. As many Outlander fans will know, things went south for Catholics in Scotland after the battle of Culloden Moor and the Jacobite rebellion, however… The Roman Catholic ecclesiastical hierarchy was reestablished in Scotland in 1878. Catholic emancipation occurred in 1829, and there was a revival of Papism in Scotland, along with an influx of Irish Catholic immigrants coming in (especially with the potato famine starting in the 1840s in Ireland), so, while Catholicism isn’t as popular in Scotland today (approximately 15% of modern Scots are Catholic), when Winnie was born (likely somewhere between 1897 and 1900, I usually put it at 1899) there would have been a good number of Catholics in Scotland. There’s a really good chance she was Catholic.
Now. Barnes. If there was ever an extremely English surname, it was Barnes. It’s pretty hard to provide reasonable evidence that George Barnes was not English, so, let’s run with that. While England today has high percentages of Islam, Hinduism, and even reasonable amounts of Sikhism and Buddhism, it was… very Christian back in the day. In fact, the only really established non-Christian religion in England was Judaism (England contained approximately 60000 Jews in 1880, a number which rose to 300000 by 1914. However, please consider that the majority of these people were fresh immigrants escaping anti-semitism in Eastern and Northern Europe, who would not have had the surname ‘Barnes’). Delving further into English Christianity- they were Anglican, pretty much.
Guess what? Protestants (ex. Anglicans like George) and Catholics (like Winnie) don’t like each other. While marriage between Protestants and Catholics wasn’t illegal in the uk at the time, it is extremely unlikely their families would have approved. So, Winnie and George moved to NYC. (Actually, this is how my very own great-great-grandparents ended up in New Zealand).
So, where does James Buchanan Barnes lie on the religion side of things? I can tell you The chances that he’s Jewish are very low. I’d say he’s probably Catholic, even if just to blend in- New York is extremely Catholic, even today. He could be Anglican. After all the shit Hydra put him through, he’s might’ve given up on religion all together. Or maybe he converted to Buddhism. A lot of people do that (Buddhism is the third largest universalizing religion on earth). I’m kidding, don’t take that seriously, he’s not a Buddhist.
I think he’s Catholic.
But hey, nothings concrete. I’ve read some really great stories where he’s Jewish. I’ve read great stories where he’s Catholic.
-Ranger616
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breitzbachbea · 6 months
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Now that you mentioned it I am very intrigued by your human Hetalia au, go on
Thank you very much anon!
So. Basic concept: A world very much the same as ours, but acting mostly hidden from the public eye, are national crime syndicates in every country. Pretty much all are spearheaded by the boss of one noteable family that ensured that position some generations ago (those bosses are the Hetalia nations, ordinary Humans here) and two right hands. The AU is called Like Father Like Son.
Now, these syndicates are very much globally connected and when it comes to each other, act less than actual organized crime organisations in real life and more like monarchies or other types of state conducting diplomacy. Also, as is very unlikely for real life and much more common for royality, the bosses have usually inherited the business and had no option to opt out/felt it was the right thing to do. This is nuanced along the way, but again, stark difference to the volatile infighting and general hierarchies from real life organized crime (where the successor is probably NOT the 17 year old son, but a trusted right hand).
But they are, at the end of the day, gangsters. They fight for their own survival and supreme status within the other criminals in their own country and amongst their peers. (Alexa, play 741 Millionen by Tüsn). They don't represent states or governments or even people. They're in it because power is nice and the sunk-cost fallacy is too great to get out.
But because I am a history nerd, they still reflect certain phases and struggles and ideas about nationhood, like their Hetalia counterparts actually would. And here is where it gets interesting.
The protagonists of the AUs mainseries, called also called Like Father Like Son with the subtitle Sangue cattivo non mente on ao3, are the Irish and the Sicilians. So it's my Hetalia OCs (though I borrowed the Sicilian from a friend) Harry O'Connel and Michele Vento, plus Harry's younger sister Sophie O'Connel, and the Human-from-the-start right hands Paddy O'Neill, Charlie Higgins and Marco & Lorenzo Bontade.
And if you're looking for an Irish villain, where do you look to? England. Always the Brits. 'May the enemies of Ireland never meet a friend'. Which is why Arthur Kirkland, along with his right hands Robert Bailey and Tahir Rashid, serves as antagonist to the Irish in many stories. And of course, this makes it easy to present the fight as underdogs vs powerful evil empire, along the line of actual historical conflict. (I am oversimplifying, but we aren't here to argue details right now and in broad strokes, it IS right). If the reader has an inkling of Irish or British history, they will see the parallels. I, as the author, work it into metaphors by the narrative entity (usually occupying one character's POV, tho not to be confused with the character being the narrator). I work it into the general themes, with characters talking about history or historical/cultural backdrops. And of course, by that the characters themselves draw the parallels and pull on old stereotypes to rage against their enemies. Arthur likes to pull out the old stereotypes of the Irish being a belligerent, backward and unreasonable race when he paints Harry as a troublemaker. Harry will paint Arthur a tyrant who can't stand to see another man free when he feels entitled to his property and life. It's so enticing to believe that you know where to stand, to know where's right on the merits of history and the real world alone.
But as soon as you take a step back, you realize how they merely use something bigger and greater than themselves to fight their petty wars. Paddy and Charlie rail against the English after they've kidnapped Harry, they say Arthur thinks the world should grovel before him because it's his righ as an Englishman. But they're never alluding to anything bigger than themselves; yes, Irish are being kicked down, but it's just them. And sure, they may say an Irishman doesn't give up and that's what the English shall see, but it's the rhetoric of revolution without its goals. There's no British threat to Ireland - no fight they can align themselves with, because Arthur certainly isn't aligned with any either. Truly, if they were so committed to it, they would look with more sympathy to Tahir, whose parents came from Pakistan in the 1970s. They'd appeal to him, see the parallels of history with Ireland and the British Colony of India. But while the English tyranny rhetoric is usually reserved for white Arthur and Robert, at the end of the day, Tahir's also an 'English pedant' and haughty prick to them. And Tahir, similiarly, doesn't have much sympathy for the Irish, seeing them as annoying obstacles to their business dealings. He's in this to give his family a better life, he knows there is nothing grand about their enterprise. They all know that. In quiet moments, amongst themselves, they even express it. The farce they play; that the ideals they want to hold they betray; that they are a cancer on the people and country they love.
And I just. I love that. I love how it still has the themes one can ask in more substantial explorations of Hetalia - the constraints of free will, bearing the sins and burdens of the past, how much you can be an individual and how much you are a role. I love how it makes them true individuals, in the end, how it employs history as something that is interpreted from the witnesses we have to the past and told through our own eyes. How it seemingly creates this parallel to real history, but when one steps back, it shows that it's play pretend and it makes the reader sympathize while also keep its distance at times, enjoying a story that is fundamentally about a lot of people making the wrong decisions and living with the consequences. It's a tragedy, a meta-level of mourning - with none of that hope for a future that any reading of history can have.
Thank you for coming to my Ted-talk. I am currently rewriting the main series, because what is up on AO3 was written by a fourteen to sixteen year old and therefore, isn't very good. However, you can still check out my other writing (and the not very good mainseries) here. I also like to make lots and lots of AUs with the many Human characters and the Hetalia characters where they're not burdened by being organized criminals. You can find my ramblings about many of these AUs on my sideblog @i-centri-degli-universi . You will also find a few written works for some AUs on the ao3 already linked.
Thank you for your attention. I hope you have a grand day, anon, as well as everyone who read through this.
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damn-daemon · 1 year
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I am half way through AVWH and while I am enjoying it very much I feel Myra can sometimes verge dangerously close to being a Mary Sue. She is beautiful and loved by nearly everyone even Jaime who is obsessed by Cersei. She is kind and perfect with her kindness to Jon when I feel the reality is she would take her mother's side and be like Sansa. Every male she comes across falls at her feet even Renly but he manipulates it to suit himself. Myra is helpless and needs rescued or breaks down all the time under pressure. She somehow is the only one Stark to survive the Red Wedding when they're all slaughtered and then they turn into a mythical creature which made me raise my eyebrows at seeing your OC morph into a werewolf. I find it strange she gave up her virginity after Jaime is defending her honor all the time. I find it corny he was her first kiss and first everything. Also having Cersei hate on her is cliche.
However your story is redeemed by the fact you write very well and you have original plotlines that I enjoyed. It's just the Mary Sue element that is offputting.
Hello, and thank you for the review! I do enjoy honest opinions, and I hope you don't mind if I address it bit by bit.
"She is beautiful and loved by nearly everyone even Jaime who is obsessed by Cersei." I have described her as pretty, but not as a great beauty like Margaery or Cersei. She is seen as beautiful by those who love her or are attracted to her of course, which I would argue isn't everyone.
Now Jaime isn't immediately attracted to her. He is only in love with Cersei. This story was a slow undoing of his attraction to Cersei as well as building his relationship with Myra, because it wouldn't be instantaneous. And it wasn't.
"She is kind and perfect with her kindness to Jon when I feel the reality is she would take her mother's side and be like Sansa."
Being kind is literally the point of her character, and I have not tried to hide that. She is kind to the point it becomes a detriment to her. And I don't understand why you think she would be like Sansa. Arya isn't. All of the Stark children act differently. I can't describe Myra as being a kind and mothering character if she hates her brother as much as Catelyn does. Her relationship with Jon drives many upcoming events.
"Every male she comes across falls at her feet even Renly but he manipulates it to suit himself."
Renly does not fall at her feet. He was using her the entire time, which was the point of his POV. I admit I wanted to do more with that plot line, but changed things, so I just threw it away. Maybe one day I can go around to fixing it.
The only male to "fall at her feet" is Robert, and that's not because of her, but who she looks like. Jaime does not fall at her feet, Tyrion does not fall at her feet, Littlefinger, Joffrey, Stannis, Walder, Roose, any of the Kingsguard, they don't fall at her feet. Just because they aren't outright mean to her doesn't mean they're in love with her. Civility is not adoration. Neither is intrigue or even kindness.
"Myra is helpless and needs rescued or breaks down all the time under pressure."
I apologize if this dates me, but I thought Mary Sues were never helpless and never needed rescue? I don't really understand what the issue is here?
She's not a warrior, so of course she's in constant need of rescue. She is also, again, too kind for her own good, and that gets her into trouble. And yes, she does break under pressure, because she gets a lot of trauma. Very few, if any of us, could handle what she goes through. It makes her human.
"She somehow is the only one Stark to survive the Red Wedding when they're all slaughtered..."
I admit, it was a tricky bit to write, but I thought I did a decent job of explaining why she might live. She was going to end up married to one of Walder's sons, because he could use her, and then wanted to make her his wife when his died. Why? Petty revenge, I guess? But to each their own. I can understand both sides of it.
"...and then they turn into a mythical creature which made me raise my eyebrows at seeing your OC morph into a werewolf."
Um...not sure if you're reading my story correctly. No one has turned into a werewolf. There are no werewolves in AVWH, or even ASOIAF as far as I know.
Now, sometimes, I do believe this plot point is a bit cringe, but I'd written myself into a corner with the prologue, so I had to roll with it.
Myra does not "morph into a werewolf." She wargs into Jinglebell, Walder's simple son. Warging is an ability that belongs to every Stark child, even Jon, though it is Bran we see utilize it most. He has been known to warg into Hodor, because he, like Jinglebell, is "easy" to control. Will Myra do this again? No, this was a one time thing, though I don't doubt she could probably warg into Brenna at some point.
What I tried to showcase here was a woman pushed to the brink, her absolute limit, on the edge of insanity and filled with a fury and need for vengeance that made the impossible happen. Her all-consuming desire to see Walder dead had her fulfilling that dream by warging into his son and stabbing him herself, though she had no idea she was doing it at the time. She will never be at this point again, so it will not happen again.
"I find it strange she gave up her virginity after Jaime is defending her honor all the time. I find it corny he was her first kiss and first everything."
Why is it so strange? They fell in love after over a year of turmoil and Myra simply wanted something to go right. Jaime defends her from being assaulted, so unless you're equating consensual sex to that, I don't understand the point here.
And yes, Myra is a sheltered girl, so he is her first everything. Not everyone in life has experience in all areas, whether by circumstance or preference. Is it corny? Maybe, but corny can be fun.
"Also having Cersei hate on her is cliche."
Cersei hates everyone by nature. There are maybe 5 people she genuinely likes, and everyone else is beneath her. If Cersei liked her, I'd find that far more off-putting.
I do appreciate that you enjoy my writing however. Feel free to respond to anything I have mentioned above. I know my work is far from perfect, and I do appreciate any help I can get on it.
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the-cranck-hobbit · 2 years
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Blend of Ice and Storm || Song of a Nightingale Pt. 1
Author's note : English is not my mother tongue, I am french but I wanted to try to write in English so here we are ! (Don't hesitate to tell me about the errors…)
Pairing : Mitchell! OC x Rooster, mention of Kazansky! OC x Hangman, mention of OC × Iceman
Summary : Two years after the uranium mission, Maverick enjoys his new life. Working on his plane, drinking beer at the Hard Deck, building a limpy little family with Penny and her daughter, Rooster, his WSO's son and Blizzard, his wingman's and old friend's daughter. 
Everything change the day he got a call which announces the existence of a 26 years daughter. 
Discover the story of Ally and Bradley, find out if Kathleen will deal with her father's legacy, and meet Beck, the first woman graduate of Top Gun.
Warning : VERY BAD WRITING, age gap, mention of death, mention of diseases, mention of parents death, mention of s*x but nothing descriptive
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The Hard Deck was animated tonight. Some pilots just came back from deployment. Among them, Kathleen “Blizzard” Kazansky, Natasha “Phoenix” Trace and Robert “Bob” Floyd. They were on the other side of the room with other pilots including Bardley “Rooster” Bradshaw and Jake “Hangman” Seresin. 
It’s been a full week since Maverick got Claudia’s call. He hasn't had any news since. He respects Claudia’s decision. But the idea of having a daughter somewhere and that perhaps he will never meet haunted him. He didn’t tell Penny about Allyson. He didn’t know how to tell her and to be honest, he was afraid of the reaction his girlfriend could have. Penny and Mav took so much time to finally be together. He was terrified at the idea of spoiling everything. 
From his stool he watches Kat playing with the ring she wears around her neck without paying attention. It was Iceman’s Annapolis ring. Kat wears it every time since his death. Even when she is flying, the precious jewel is hiding under her fly suit. Before she launches, she brings the ring to her lips and whispers “fly with me”. Like a little prayer. She doesn’t really need prayer. Kat got the skills from both of her parents : the top graduate of Top Gun 86 promotion : Tom “Iceman” Kazansky; and the first woman ever to graduate from Top Gun : Becca “Blizzard” Morrow. But it was important for her to keep her father close to her. 
Maverick remembers the bond that his wingman got with his daughter. Their complicity, their look for each other. Iceman never misses a ballet show. Kat’s always searching for her father in the crowd. How they mourned Becca when she died. How Ice was so proud to see his daughter being the top graduate of her Top Gun’s promo. 
The answer of “who is the best pilot between Maverick and Iceman” was still a mystery. But about fatherhood ? Iceman wins, definitely. 
“Earth to Maverick !”
Pete was so lost in his thought that he didn’t see Blizzard approach. She has an amusing smile on her lips. 
“Head on the cloud captain ?” “It looks like, lieutenant.” Maverick answers, putting his beer to his lips. Kat sat on the stool next to him and ordered a Vodka with ice. Maverick smiled. She inherited not only her father’s skill but also his taste in drink. “On me” Pete told Jimmy. Kat thanks him. 
“Bradley told me about the girl.” Maverick barely jumps on his stool and looks over his shoulder. Penny was on the other side of the bar. Kat follows his look and her eyes wide. “You didn’t tell Penny ?” Maverick looks back at Kat. He wasn’t suprise that Bradley told her about Allyson. Rooster and Blizzard were like siblings. They became much closer after Ice's death, when Bradley was the only one that understood Kat’s pain.  
“I don’t know how to tell her. It’s complicated.” Kat raises an eyebrow. “complicated ? Given the age you’ve got when you finally end up together, it’s not breaking news that you’ve got a life before her. Just like she got a life before you.” “Yeah but it’s a little strange don’t you think ? A child coming from nowhere twenty-six year later.” Kat burst out laughing. “You are talking to Hangman’s girlfriend ! If tomorrow a woman walks through that door carrying a toddler with blond hair, green eyes and a bloody southern accent, I wouldn’t even be surprised !” She looks away and frowns. “In fact, I’m surprised it’s not already happening.” Mav laughs. “Tell her, Mav. Trust her and tell her.” Mav looks at Blizzard. She looked like her mother except for her eyes. She’s got Iceman’s blue eyes. 
As a woman, she was a mixt of both, her father’s wisdom and her mother’s talent for delivering ego checks. And it was the same way as a pilot. She inherits the cold blood of Iceman. When she is flying, she stays calm no matter the situation. A natural leader. However, she is flying like her mother did. More risky, more on the edge of the abyss. 
A perfect blend of Ice and Storm : Blizzard. 
Maverick nods, he promesses her to tell Penny. Kat put a hand on his shoulder and rejoined the other young pilot. As soon as she was on his side, Kat put her arm on Jake’s waist. Still talking to Bradley, Jake put his arm around Kat’s shoulder and pecked a kiss on her head. 
____________
The Hard Deck, two years ago.
Phoenix's face glowed when she saw her ex Top Gun's roommate enter the bar. "Kat !" She took her friend in her arms as a warm welcome. Bizzard smiled at her friend and before she could ask her some news, she heard an annoying tone. "Well, well, well. Look who's here. Our princess of the sky." Even if she didn't look at him, Blizzard could hear Hangman's smirk. "Well, well, well" she imitated him, her voice as cold as ice. "Bagman." She kicked the pool’s cue he leant on, which hit right on the cocky blond pilot's crotch. Hangman bent in two, hissing of pain. Coyote, Payback, Fanboy and Bob cringed of solidarity pain. 
Blizzard leaned toward Hangman and whispered to him, a smirk on her lips "what did I tell you about the pet name ?"
She greeted Coyote, Payback and Fanboy and looked at the shy pilot. "You should be Bob, aren't you ?" She reached out to him with a warm smile. Bob nervously shook her hand, not used to the young woman's change of mood. "Nice to meet you. I'm Blizzard. Or Kat, for friends." With the last words she sends a dagger look at Hangman who's smirk totally disappears off his face. 
It was at this moment that Bradley Bradshaw chose to make his entrance. All the pilot cheers at him.
Phoenix sent him her cue on his stomach for not telling her he was back in the States. 
"Right in the pocket." Kat mocked softly, giving a high five to Phoenix. Rooster got up and looked at Phoenix. “Nice to see you too.” He turned to Blizzard and opened his arm to put his childhood friend in a bear hug. "Hello, Kitty Kat."
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khaleesiofalicante · 2 years
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Thank you for the new chapter, I was having a shitty day today. But not anymore hehe🤪
I'm just going on record, please rewrite that down that this chapter is by far my favorite one out of one, not to say I don't love the other ones but I adore this one more, angsty more than I anticipated and still love it ( what can I say I'm a masochist who likes to torture myself) so here's me losing my shit over it. (This is gonna be long sorry) .
"It's not a cat," Magnus scoffs and holds up the creature. "It's a kitty." Now this is just mean you make me want to afobt a cat which I will get up tomorrow and do it.
"He doesn’t trust her at all. What if she messes things up for them? Deliberately? What if Magnus doesn’t get the scholarship? What if Magnus has to go back to England? Magnus only has one more year. He can finish it and come back. Of course. But what if he doesn’t want to? A lot can change in one year." Alec my DUDE chill out, why are you planing and things for Magnus go ask him.
“Yes. Of course. But if you start using that as a valid reason to get what you want, it will be hard for you to stop.” “Perhaps you should start there,” his father notes." Wait no, Robert is the voice of reason something is not rightwith universe I can feel it . Please don't make me like him.
"Camille Belcourt" ALEC IDIOT LIGHTWOOD WTF ARE YOU DOING ???? WHAT IS UR DAMN PROBLEM? WERE YOU DROPED ON UR HEAD WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD?   Messaging Camille? The personification of the devil himself? Are you serious right now ???? Man if I could bitch slap you right now or break ur legs I would. 🤬
"Rafael has always hated watching Animal Planet." Please go see a therapist asap, it's not normal to not like watching animals documentary.
"He likes plans and routines. He likes consistency. He does not like surprises or sudden changes or spontaneous decision-making." He sound so much like his Dad 🥲
"Anjali would prefer a place with a garden." "They can spend all their time together then." Certified sappy asshole💯 💞
"When he sits down, his stomach hurts worse. It’s always been like this. When he is nervous, his stomach hurts badly." OH Rafael support being strong headed and go get help for ur anxiety.
"He can’t wake up every morning and check if his father is dead or alive." This one hurt. In a very I want to crawl into a hole and never leave it.
“Why did you file for divorce?” Rafael asks. “That night. Why didn’t you talk to me? Or anyone? Why did you do that, dad? I told you not to do it.” This whole conversation between Alec and Rafael is just chef kiss. Him trying to understand why the divorce happened. Alec wanting to keep Magnus safe and trusting Rafael to do so. And oooh now we know why Alec didn't let Magnus go to London, I feel bad for Rafe he is just a child he shouldn't be responsible for taking care of Magnus that should be Alec's things. Over all I love this father son bond. 😍
“Because he had seen his father’s love and strength and success and kindness and all of it and thought ‘this is what I want to be like too’." You just killed me with this line. Yup, you can hear my heart shattering at how pure this is.
"I don’t think estrogen is going to fix your dumbassery,” Catarina points out" words of wisdom from our own queen Catarina Loss everyone 👏👏👏 also Alec and Magnus finally can sit in the same room and work things out is a huge improvement.
"Rafael is hiding his pain from Magnus." He is hiding so many different parts of him." I can't imagine how hard this is must be on Magnus, to have you're child not turning to you in times on need.
“I gave you so much and you just kept taking! Everyone just keeps taking from me! And I am so fucking tired, and I have nothing more to give! I’m done! Leave me alone!” and finally we see Rafael has had enough of everyone, I can kinda understand where he is coming from its not easy to deal with parentswho suffer from depression and suicide through not knowing if they gonna make it till morning, and Magnus had a habit of runing away from his problems. also drinking is not the solution please don't be like ur dad.
Okay, wow yeah, This chapter starts so soft and tender then poof hit me with Camille then goes right back with Rafael pov and finished it with him leaving, I can't imagine what the impact going to be like for Magnus, it's gonna break him knowing his child only stayed with him because Alec asked him to 😭😭 this is hurt worst than Castiel telling Dean he loves him and then dies 💔  I can't wait for the next chapter to further break my heart.
NOT THE SUPERNATURAL THING OMG (i dont even watch that show but damn dick move from the writers oof)
i'm glad you liked this one. this was one of the chapters where i wrote it and i was like 'uhhhh not that great ugh'. So i love it when yall say you like it because i am like 'seeeeee?????? they like it'
thank you ;)
ps - adopt the cat yo
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robertdowneyjjr · 2 years
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Thank you for your answer to the qu about indio/rdj! It was really nice reading a more positive explanation, honestly. I think the reason it stands out is because its not an isolated incident, like if you read interviews from 2012 onwards, you’ll notice he starts using the singular term ‘kid’ eventho he has 2 and indio was only 18 so its very confusing and thats the case in majority of articles. Also like I said those freudian slips infront of the camera where he’s literally forgotten about his existance and realised and then had to backtrack and correct himself? Not a good look tbh. That being said I dont think he does it maliciously? He just needs to think more because he does it A LOT and i know other people have noticed and commented on it too. I mean the 2014 birthday post thing was just straight up not good and he’s a very emotionally intelligent man so that was definitely a choice. With the dolittle award speech, it was for kca, I would agree w you but the way he specifically said susans name and then exton and avri with little sentences for each is what made it odd. Not to mention he’s never mentioned indio in any of his award speeches and yeah he’s older now but rdj has won numerous awards since he was born but now he’s always mentioning his new kids? Like why such a drastic difference you know? There’s just too many instances so I dont think its the biggest reach but we dont know what their real life is like. It’s just sad to see because its quite obvious that indio has always gotten the shortest end of the stick :( and obv rdj is busy, he’s always away filming or going places and when he isnt, he spends most of the time in his hampton’s place so logistically I dont think they see eachother much — and i say this because i was just thinking about how he’s essentially an only child and his mother isnt doing very well health wise, so yk rdj is basc the only person he really has. I want to think that im exaggerating but honestly i could make a whole book out of the times rdj has acted/insinuated like he only has 2 kids, when age wasnt even relevant. Like even their christmas card from a few years ago, I dont really understand why he didnt include his own son? He wasnt even that old, he had just turned 21 and thats irrelevant anyway, just so odd.... Wow this wasnt meant to be this long, apologies for dragging on and going off on a tangent, i know you dont care too much about this stuff but i really did enjoy reading your opinion! Also idk if what im trying is clear so a small example that isnt very deep is him saying ‘I am married, I have a kid, I have a real life without cameras.’ - from his interview with Times Magazine, Indio was 19 and Exton 1 - ‘A kid’ ? 🥴 like I said not too deep but still weird? Age is not of relevance here, your kid is your kid esp when youre speaking about it the way he is and he basc does this 90% of the time which is why I question it - sorry if ive repeated things again, just wanted to explain my thinking better :)
hmm okay. honestly, i really won’t be giving this much more thought because at the end of the day, it’s really not our business and like i said before, we don’t know what their relationship is and we can’t judge it just from the few social posts and publicly accessible video clips that are available.
it wouldn’t do anyone any good to overanalyze this. i’m generally a glass half full kind of person and i don’t think indio is being overlooked by his parents. robert was extremely supportive of him throughout his trial. he supports his son’s music career which is obviously one of the most important things in indio’s life right now. jimmy (rip angel), who was robert’s right hand man and was basically with him almost every day, was extremely close to indio. davy and travis, who also work closely with robert, also know indio well and interact with him regularly on socials. i just don’t think, if robert and indio had a poor relationship, that his inner circle would be close to indio. but they are, and their obvious connection is robert. for me, by all accounts, i believe he’s being as good a father as he can be for indio.
again, there is a lot we don’t know and we can’t just assume one thing or another just because we get a glimpse into 2% of their lives. we don’t know them personally. we don’t know their family dynamics. we can’t just project and fill in the gaps (and there are a lot of gaps here) when we don’t have all the information, nor is it any of our business, to be honest.
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mybookplacenet · 2 years
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Author Interview: Ken Adams
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Tell us about yourself.: I am a lawyer (LL.M., McGill University, Montreal, Canada) and, most importantly, a happy husband and father (one son, and a baby boy on his way). After practicing law for many years and serving as ad hoc diplomat to a specialized UN agency, I am currently focused on enjoying my family time and writing, and I am very happy to join the My Book Place community! Where did you grow up, and how did this influence your writing?: I was born and raised in Argentina, but a big part of my adult life in Canada. North-America´s unique environment, cultural background, and landscapes have heavily influenced my writing, as you can tell from the very cover of "Crimson Winter" Do you have any unusual writing habits? I don't think I have any writing habits that are noteworthy for their uniqueness. But when I'm committed to a project, I’m determined to write every day (for intellectual activities, I am more productive in the second half of the day and at night). I also endeavor to strictly follow Stephen King's advice: "If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others: read a lot and write a lot. There’s no way around these two things that I’m aware of, no shortcut." What authors have influenced you? I was born and raised in Argentina, but a big part of my adult life in Canada. North-America´s unique environment, cultural background, and landscapes have heavily influenced my writing, as you can tell from the very cover of "Crimson Winter" Do you have any advice for new authors? Of all the persons living on earth, there is only one who has the power to cast the deciding vote to kill your dream. That person is you. So, keep writing, keep writing, and…keep writing! Remember that "an overnight success is ten years in the making." (Tom Clancy). What is the best advice you have ever been given? "What is talent? Does anybody know how to measure talent? What if talent is something you grow, not something you inherit? The fact is writing fiction requires a few skills. We’ve never met anyone who had all those skills when they started writing. Every single published novelist we know spent long hours learning the craft of fiction. They all had one thing in common: persistence. We have no idea what talent may be, but we do know persistence when we see it. If you have persistence, you have as good of a chance of getting published as anyone else." Randy Ingermanson. What are you reading now? I have a list of classic books I still have to tackle (or reread), such as: Airframe (M. Crichton), Notes from Underground (F. Dostoevsky), Of Mice and Men (J. Steinbeck), and Slaughterhouse-Five (K. Vonnegut), among others. What's your biggest weakness? I´m probably too much concerned about the future of my family. To be certain that they will never be in need is my obsession. What is your favorite book of all time? I´m incapable of choosing just one, but some of my favorite books are The Grapes of Wrath, To Kill a Mockingbird—not surprisingly, given my profession—The Catcher in the Rye (it doesn’t amaze me that an average of 700 copies of this book are still sold every day around the world, more than 70 years after its first publication), Patricia Highsmith's novels, and Ambrose Bierce's short stories, among others. When you're not writing, how do you like to spend your time? I love spending time with my family, reading, and teaching -this is a passion that I think will never abandon me! Do you remember the first story you ever read, and the impact it had on you? The first book that I recall reading was "Treasure Island", by Robert L. Stevenson, when I was just a kid. It ignited my imagination and it started it all. What has inspired you and your writing style? Still today, every time I read a good fiction book or watch a classic movie (old or new), I feel great respect and admiration for those who were able to craft a story so compelling that touches you deep inside or, at least, keep your interest alive until the last minute. That´s a gift! And that´s the fuel that stimulates my writing. Regarding my “style,” I just try to do my best to fulfill the best maxim I´ve ever read about writing fiction: the sole objective of every book and, if possible, every scene on it, must be giving your reader a powerful emotional experience. What are you working on now? I have several writing projects in mind. After finishing reading "Crimson Winter," you’ve surely realized that the main one is a continuation of this story, for “Crimson Winter” is intended to be the first installment of a series (ideally, three books). Many readers have told me that they’re already looking forward to the next book, which of course flatters me and places a great responsibility upon my shoulders at the same time. I would also like to write a story in which the protagonist is a woman who must face challenges that push her to the limits and, at first, appear to overwhelm her completely, albeit with an entirely different theme and setting than "Crimson Winter." The only thing they will have in common is the underlying theme of female empowerment. Finally, I'm about halfway through a collection of stories that could be labeled as "grim." What is your favorite method for promoting your work? Through promotion sites, like MBP! What's next for you as a writer? To focus on the projects I mentioned before. How well do you work under pressure? I´d say I do well, as long as the motivation is strong enough to keep me going. How do you decide what tone to use with a particular piece of writing? I just picture the scene in my head, and try to choose the tone and pick the words that I believe are best to reproduce that image in the readers´ own minds. As Stephen King brilliantly put it: What´s writing? Telepathy, of course. If you could share one thing with your fans, what would that be? At this moment, there’s nothing I´d love to share more with the entire world that my joy of soon becoming a father for the second time. Ken Adams's Author Websites and Profiles Website Amazon Profile Read the full article
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dwjfansitearchive · 2 years
Text
News Bulletins - November 2007
World Fantasy Award Acceptance Speech
On November 3rd 2007, the World Fantasy Association gave me a Lifetime Acheivement Award, in conjunction with another lady. It is almost unknown for them to give this award to a woman, let alone two. As I was unable to go to America to receive it, I sent my speech of thanks to my friend and editor, Sharyn November, to deliver for me.
This is it:
Thank you everyone, and thanks too to Sharyn November for agreeing to read this. (How is that for getting a person to thank herself? It can be done).
I am really very grateful for this Award. It is one of the first given to a woman, and to two women at that. When I first started getting work published, I used to have wistful thoughts at the way all important awards were given to men. Women, I used to think, could be as innovative, imaginative and productive as possible - and women were the ones mostly at work in the field of fantasy for children and young adults - but only let a man enter the field, and people instantly regarded what he had to say and what he did as more Important. He got respectful reviews as well as awards, even if what he was doing - which it often was - was imitating the women. But you have changed all that.
Thank you for being so enlightened.
Women, large-minded, formidable women, have played an almost exclusive part in helping my career. I have hardly ever dealt with a man - at least, when it came to publishing: when it came to personal help, I have always relied heavily on my husband, John Burrow, who has come unfailingly to my rescue during those times when I walked despairingly about the house, saying I would never manage to write another word. (This tends to happen to me a lot). And he was always the only person who could convince Susan Hirschman of Greenwillow that what she was proposing was illiterate. He is a professor of English, and she respected that. I need to thank him, and also my three sons, who, as children, read my stuff and gave me very frank criticisms.
Richard was always very sensitive to places where I had got things *emotionally* wrong ('You should make this a bit *nastier*, Mum') and Mick never said much, but when he did, I fell over myself to put whatever-it-was right, because he was always spot on. Colin was helpful too, when he was young, but on reaching his teens, complained that typescripts always went back to front on him and that he disapproved of happy endings on principle.
Whatever, I have to thank them all.
As for these formidable ladies I spoke of, the first I have to thank is my agent, Laura Cecil. Before I was introduced to her, I had been trying to get published for ten years, and publishers' responses ranged from 'Who you?' to 'What do you mean, breaking all our rules and protocols?' right on to - this was over EIGHT DAYS OF LUKE, whose plot depends on someone striking a match to summon Luke/Loki - 'We can't publish this: children shouldn't play with fire.' ! The moment Laura came on the scene, I struck gold at Macmillan, London, and I have to thank her for that, and for about forty more years of the same.
Laura introduced me to the formidable Marni Hodgkin at Macmillan. Every other member of her family has won a Nobel Prize for something, and I often felt that Marni should have won one too, just for being herself. Robert Westall once phoned me tremulously, after Marni had had him in her office about his latest book. 'It's like being brainwashed,' he said. 'She pulled every part of the book to pieces and made me put it togwether differently, and I found myself adoring her for it. It - it's unhealthy!'
Now I don't do being brainwashed, so my relationship with Marni was always rather stormy.
This is where I learnt what literary agents are *really* for: they are for pulling you off the throat of your publisher. Marni always had to make a change in every book, regardless of whether it was necessary. Laura had to do a lot of work on me there, until the solution came to me. You see, in those days, there was only the one typescript - you couldn't just do another printout as you can with computers - and I would take the typescript meekly home with me, find the places where Marni was insisting on changes, and cut those places into irregular strips. Then I would stick them together with tape in just the same order, utterly unchanged, and send it back. 'Oh,' Marni would always say. 'Your changes have made such a difference!'
And, like Robert Westall, I adored her. She published three of my books in one year. She encouraged me, simply by wanting to pay all that attention to those books. And all writers need this kind of encouragement. It is the best kind there is. So I have to thank Marni quite devoutly.
The other person I have to thank is the redoubtable Susan Hirschman at Greenwillow. Susan published everything I ever sent her, promptly and efficiently, and was thereby my other main encouragment. If I was slow with the next book, there would be a gentle, steely enquiry, and that was all. That was all it took. Nevertheless, Laura had to wrork on me here too, not on plot changes, because Susan always loved stories and didn't tamper there, ever. With her it was all about *words*. It goes without saying that there was the matter of translating from British English to American, which always made me restive; but the main things were often quite absurd. I remember particularly the Great Muesli Row, in which Susan stated categorically that there was no such thing as Muesli in the United States; while I tried indignantly to draw her attention to the shop across the street from her office, where the window was filled with Muesli. I think she must have gone and looked in the end, because Muesli was not replaced with oatmeal.
Actually, I loved Susan for her categorical ways and wish she hadn't retired. She flew hundreds of airmiles to hear me speak, and if she couldn't get there, she alway demanded a copy of the speech. What better encouragement can a person have?
Actually Sharyn herself gave me encouragement of a different kind the day the news about the award was leaked. It was the day before my birthday - which was both joyful and gloomy, because there is nothing like a *Lifetime Acheivement* Award to ram it home to one that one is now seventy-three and decidedly getting on in years. And people have lately been writing books and learned articles and student theses on my work, which makes me, frankly, feel as if I might have died without noticing the fact, or else that they mean some other Jones.
They always call me 'subversive', which in a way I am, although, looking back on my relations with Marni and Susan, I think that 'intransigent' is a better word. One learned article, however, described me as 'rooted in fluidity', which took me aback a little. 'Good Lord!' I cried out. 'That sounds as if I'm a hydroponic lettuce!'
Anyway, Sharyn said to me,'This is only an award for your lifetime *up to now*. Don't you dare go and *die*!' And I don't intend to, thanks to Sharyn. I intend to go on and write the perfect book, which I know I haven't done yet. Meanwhile, you can all feel very proud and pleased that you have given this award to a woman who is the world's first hydroponically grown writer.
Thank you very, very much.
Diana Wynne Jones
(Editor's note: The other Life Achievement Award went to editor and publisher Betty Ballantine, co-founder of Ballantine Books. Full list of winners at http://www.worldfantasy.org/awards/
(on web archive)
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valenzuela36lin · 2 years
Text
hermes crocodile kelly 7
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whatdoesshedotothem · 2 years
Text
Wednesday 20 June 1832
9 ¾
12 35
rain in the night – fine morning F66° at 10 – down to breakfast at 11 35 - very kind letter 2 1/2pp. from Mrs. H.S. Belcombe, York, to announce her return from Harrogate and say she hoped to see me for a little while on my return – odd sort of civil letter from Mr. Parker my attorney at H-x – could not imagine what he was driving at by his apologizing for the liberty taken ‘in my present application, which is on behalf of a young friend, Mr. Edwards Dyson, the youngest son of Mrs. Dyson of Willow field – the gentleman, a genteel youth between 17 and 18, who at present is, and for some time past has been with a private tutor near Cheltenham, is wishful to go upon the continent for 2 or 3 months this summer, and his mother is naturally anxious that he should accompany a respectable and intelligent party – now being very well aware of your experience and judgment in such matters, it has occurred to me that perhaps you might know of some small party taking a continental trip, to whom my young friend might introduced with safety and advantage – could you at all assist us in this matter   it would indeed confer the greatest obligation – Perhaps it is unnecessary to remark that expense would be quite a secondary consideration – I have the honour to remain, Madam, with great consideration your faithful servant Robert Parker’!!! to which I have just written in answer ‘Langton hall – Wednesday 20 January 1832. Sir – nothing would give me greater pleasure than to be able to be of any use to you in any way; and I should also be exceedingly glad to have it in my power to be of any sort of service to Mrs. Dyson of Willow field; but, I regret to say, in the present instance, I know of no means whatever by which I can help you at all – one circumstance or other seems to have caused so great a stagnation among continental travelling parties, that I hear of nothing but indefinite delays or schemes given up – with every possible wish for you success, I am, sir, the obligated A Lister’ - then till about 3 wrote 3pp. and ends to M- 10 days since I wrote wonder I have not heard from her hope it is not on account of illness – have waited to the last in the hope of fearing from her ‘to see whether it was possible to arrange our meeting again and have just determined to leave here on Monday next – as this was not fixed till last night, I could not name it to you before’ – mention having heard this morning from Mrs. Henry Belcombe – should have been glad to spend a little while with her on my return but had just written to her to say that tho’ I was not so alarmed as Mrs. N- at cholera I knew my aunt would be so alarmed at my staying now in York, that I really dared not sleep there and durst only hope to see my friends for an hour or 2 en passant – said I had heard how their (the Lawtons’) plans were changed – York and even Harrogate given up – but M- still still hoped to be in York after their return from London – hoped to be at Shibden by 8 or 9 on Monday evening – feared the cholera had reached Bradford – broken out in London – Mrs. Henry Robinson just brought to bed of a little girl – hope to find a letter from M- at Shibden ‘God bless you my dearest Mary! I shall hardly feel satisfied till I have heard that you are well – Believe me always very entirely and especially yours AL’ I had some difficult to spin it out but it is well enough expressing my anxiety to hear that William Lawton was not likely to disappoint her in anything – ‘I found your little charge’ (little Mariana) ‘is arrived – I shall be glad to see her improved, as I trust she is, in every respect and grown too’ – wrote all the above of today till 3 ¾ - dressed – wrote 2pp. to my aunt – dinner at 4 40 – wrote and sent off this morning at 12 ¼ by James Marshall a ½ sheet full and 1p. of ½ sheet envelope to ‘Mrs. Henry Belcombe, Minster yard, York’ chitchat thank her very much for her kind letter – a great disappointment to me not to be able to spend a little while with her but my aunt would be alarmed etc. an inconvenience to me also thus to hurry out of York, as I had business there I was anxious to settle – said the cholera was a better excuse than usual for the Lawtons change of plans - came to my room at 6 ¼ finished my letter of 3 pages to my aunt merely thanks for her letter and the parcel received on the 12th and to sat I had ‘just fixed to be off from here on Monday morning, stay an hour or 2 in York about the business you know I am so anxious to settle, and hope to reach you about nine in the evening of that day’ - had intended staying a few days but thought it best to keep out of the way of cholera as much as one could - mentioned my letter and draft to Mr Henry Playforth sent off on Monday and begged Marian to name it, if she was writing to any of her friends at Market W- Steel going to Malton and sent off at 6 ¾ my letter to my aunt ‘Shibden hall H-x’ and to ‘Mrs. Lawton, Lawton hall, Lawton, Cheshire’ and to ‘Robert Parker Esquire, the Square H-x’ tea – looking over and making notes from Mrs. N- MS. account taken from his letters of Norcliffes tone to the northern capitals –
walked with CN- in the East balk field or ½ hour then a few minutes in the garden but rain sent me in at 1 ½ -
¾ hour tête-à-tête with CN- very good friends as usual - came to my room at 11 ¾ - CN- with me a few minutes – dull morning – rain from 1 ½ for the rest of the day and all the evening – heavy rain with thunder and forked lightning – F66° at 12 tonight -
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jacepens · 2 years
Note
You'll regret this xD
7, 10, 13, 17, 19
Have fun
Ps. Love you<3
Or will it be you who regrets having to read my way too long answers? xD <3
7. What is your deepest joy about writing?
Oh this is quite the question lol. I kinda wanna say the satisfaction of writing something? Especially when it's something I genuinely enjoy reading again or I was able to make a story come together and get the emotions right. A close second is seeing other people's reactions to it
10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?
Oooh I love this question, thank you, because yes. I'll start with my own since I have a few that have haunted me, but I still think my fic A Beautiful Tragedy haunts me the most but like in a good way. I think for me and writing it, it was all very natural and I really got invested in that world like none others I've written. I was sad and needed to write about sadness and I think I accomplished that:) (But I left it on a positive-ish note!) As for others writings, the first that come to mind are Blue_Clover's Let Down My Guard because oh my god wow doesn't even begin to describe it. This fic also means alot to me not only because it was a gift (still shedding tears of thanks) but at the end of it, it made me so emotional/introspective it sent me on a personal journey xD. Life changing stuff in there lol. (Go read it if you haven't). The second is like...anything and everything written by grumblebee?? I can't really name one or two of their fics I think also because they inspire(d) me so much and like. oh my god. It's all so spectacular.
13. What is a subject matter that is incredibly difficult for you write about? What is easy?
...I'm half-tempted to say not-washette and then washette. But I'll try to answer more seriously xD
Tbh I know there are plenty of topics etc I struggle to write, but for a specific example, I'm struggling to come up with one. I'm going to start by answering the easy one and see if that helps me remember lol. For easy to write, I guess mostly emotional things?? Not all the time, but especially when I've been feeling those emotions I am able to translate it into pretty good words (in my opinion, sometimes lol). I guess I struggle with (I am struggling to put it into words right now oof) the emotions I don't know as well?? I'm so sorry, I really want to give a good answer but I'm struggling. Maybe this is my weakness. But I know they exist and I know that I've had fic ideas that I shoot down for knowing I won't be able to write it well or easily. I'm just struggling with specifics lol sorry.
17. Talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. Tell me about the lore, the history, the detail, the things that won’t make it in the text.
Haha, which one? xD Hmm well without giving spoilers in one wip I've accidentally built a whole town that I don't think we'll be coming back to. It features the Turn spy ring as a group of con-people who have mastered the art of cheating at cards and gambling. They all work together to get a person riled up into betting more, not noticing when Anna is sliding an ace into Ben's hand or Caleb is filling up their cup of ale after every sip or Abe's role as the innocent bystander come to give you advice or give you a reason to hate everyone in that room. Robert Townsend is like. so tired of them lol. Not to mention the no-good sheriffs are so horrible at their job because they're too busy bickering with each other. That's right, sheriffs. Whoever let two people be sheriff at the same time must've been either exhausted or too drunk to realize the horrible decision (Knowing Henry Laurens though, it was likely the latter, or his son getting into business that's not his). But who knows, Alex and Thomas make good enough sheriffs on their own, maybe one day they'll be able to sort out their differences and start doing something right in this town. Maybe. Madison is beyond fed up with them though. As for the Schuyler’s, they’ve been doing quite well on their own, inherited all their father’s land and assets. Eliza is starting to feel bored with the whole money and management and deals thing, Angelica is better at that anyway. Peggy is…well we don’t know where Peggy went, but her sisters know she’ll be back soon. In the meantime, Angelica is getting more and more frustrated with Henry Lauren’s corruption and horrible leadership. Eliza is starting to wonder if there’s anything she can do to help.
19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?
Ahhh yess. hehe I'm not sure I've ever told this story on tumblr but thank you. I technically started in I think the summer of 2019, I remember very clearly because I was on vacation with my family and one night my body decided to have like the worst panic attack ever:) (also, the first one I've ever had!) I'm not exaggerating when I say it lasted about 6 hours alllllll night long. It was awful. But during that long and horrible night, I was looking for things to comfort me and calm me down as much as it could and eventually I turned to washette. This was actually more of a return as many years before (you know, during the Hamilton age lol) I read a ton of washette fics and fell in love with them then, but that night really solidified my love. I spent the rest of the week re-reading all my old favorites and just like being so happy with them. The next night after the panic attack night, I was looking for a way to calm down still and suddenly decided: goddammit, I am going to write some washette because I've always wanted to and why shouldn't I do it now?? I made like a bulleted list of one very cute and sentimental scene. One day I'll turn it into a full fic because it's very special to me:) And the rest is history (literally?? lol). I just started writing more and more until I felt brave enough to post something to ao3. Fun fact, I got so panicked after posting my very first washette fic that I immediately deleted it not only from the site but like all my living copies of it. Which is sad for me now as it's lost to time, but I did ultimately end up writing something else and posting it and it's still up today!:) Now I don't delete any of my old works even if I don't like them anymore. Honestly I've gone back and re-read old drafts and been like: this is good??? Baby Tal, this is like so good??? but also been like: oh dear. So you know. I also first started writing these fics on my old phone that had one of those push up keypad things. I still have the phone and some drafts inside! I had to write them as messages and save the drafts because the notes feature wouldn't let you type much at all xD Oh how things have changed. As for now, school has severely drained me of my passion but I reallllllly want to write more and finally have something to share. I am working on things but I can’t promise they’ll be soon. I can only hope lol
Ok lol, I know that last one is long but it means a lot to me. I hope I didn't bore you;)
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shroomshoponline · 2 years
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Thank You, Jimmy Connors
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I was first introduced to the game of tennis when I was four years old. The racket was nearly as tall as I was. My father's brother had been a Chicago city champ as a teenager so that is where the idea came from to develop me into something of a tennis phenom. Fortunately, the game enthralled me from the outset. No parental pressure was necessary to keep me motivated. I practiced every chance I got even if that meant simply hitting against a backboard hour after hour. At the age of eight I was entering local tournaments. All four years I played on the varsity high school team. Upon graduating from high school I had been at the game for fourteen years and had become an exceptionally mediocre player. My real talent lay in breaking rackets. I was very good at that. When my father refused to buy me any more rackets I quit playing. He suggested I take up handball.
"You've only got two hands, son. Break both of them if you like but I'm not buying you any more," he said.
Still, I remained a fan of tennis and followed the prowess of the professional players throughout the 70's and 80's. Jimmy Connors was, is and always will be my favorite. Round about the age of eleven Connors became a student of a highly respected coach at the time named Poncho Segura. Segura didn't take on many students. He was very selective. Years later he recalled his first impressions of Connors saying something along the lines of the following…
"The young boy had talent, of course. But he was not as talented as many of my other students. What impressed me the most about him, however, was that he never gave up on a shot. He refused to concede a point. He would dive for balls with total disregard for his own well-being. He never quit and that's what I admired most about him."
In 1982 I stopped working, sold what possessions I could and set off to travel around the world. I wasn't nearly as concerned with finding myself as I was with losing myself. Recent history had recorded the demise of my marriage and my father. The thrill of doing improv comedy in the night clubs around Chicago had begun to wane and my dreams of becoming an accomplished writer were steadily evaporating.
The cheapest flight I could book landed me in Brussels. From there I headed straight to Paris, checked into a transient hotel near the Latin Quarter and walked around that glorious museum of a city fifteen hours a day for two weeks. I'd have stayed longer if it hadn't been so damn cold. So, I moved south through Italy and onto Greece where I eventually washed ashore on an island called Patmos not far from west coast of Turkey. I met an interesting elderly American writer named Robert Lax. We soon developed an affinity for one another that was to continue for the next seventeen years. I also developed an affinity of a different nature with an enchanting young French girl that lasted…well, it lasted less than seventeen years but it lasted long enough to instill memories that were well cherished.
From Athens I flew to Bombay arriving at 3 AM. The next thirty-six hours were a kaleidoscope of the most bizarre, yet fascinating, images I had ever seen in my life. There just ain't any place on the planet like India! I had planned to travel around there for three months but after six weeks the joint had beaten me up bad. I lost fifteen pounds and was beginning to waste away muscle mass. Two young German men had talked glowingly about a small island in the Gulf of Siam called Koh Samui. So, next stop…Bangkok. Good food, gracious people, lovely young women and all very affordable. There wasn't much not to like about Bangkok in those days.
A week later I was ensconced in a wooden, palm-thatched bungalow upon the glorious pristine shores of Koh Samui. My neighbors were a young Swiss couple named Roland and Claire. Samui was little known then other than by back-packers. It was a veritable paradise. The Swiss couple and I became good friends. We smoked lots of ganja, ate magic mushroom omelets and banana pancakes, spent hours drifting on the gentle swell of the bay in large inner tubes as colorful little fish frolicked around us and enjoyed many good laughs together. For two months I rarely spent more than five dollars a day. I actually thought about spending the rest of my life there. Then one morning the bungalow restaurant television aired a replay of the Wimbledon men's championship between Jimmy Connors and John McEnroe. By that time McEnroe was the number one ranked men's tennis player in the world. I don't know where Connors was ranked and I don't think he did either. All he knew was that he wasn't ranked #1. He had once remarked that being ranked #2 was of little difference to him than being ranked #200. He only wanted to be the best and for many years he was. Being second or third best was of no consequence to him. Know more here Shroom Capsules
In 1982 McEnroe was the reigning Wimbledon champion having finally ended Bjorn Borg's dominance of that tournament the year before. He was heavily favored to retain the title by defeating Connors. In the early stages of the match it looked as if he was going to do just that. Connors was down and appeared out-classed…out-classed in terms of his tennis skills, that is. He was never out-classed with regard to his fighting spirit. As I lounged in a bamboo chair nursing a pineapple milkshake and toking on a Thai stick Connors began to stage one of the most remarkable displays of human resilience I had ever seen in an athletic event. I watched in awe as he dove for shots, chased every ball and poured out so much energy that one felt there was nothing left in reserve. But, Connors always had more even if he had to generate it as he went along. Towards the end it seemed as if McEnroe was in awe of Connors…as if he couldn't believe Connors was still there. When Connors finally triumphed I snuffed out the Thai stick and returned to my Spartan bungalow where I sat gazing out upon the gently undulating bay. A gently undulating bay that was far more placid than the thoughts aroused by Mr. Connors performance. Following a particularly challenging match years earlier Connors was in a trainer's room receiving a therapeutic massage. His bad-boy buddy from Romania, Ilie Nastase, paid him a visit. Nastase was an excellent tennis player blessed with more natural talent than Connors. Their brief exchange went something like this:
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fandom-puff · 3 years
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A Lion’s Feast
Pairing: tywin lannister x younger!wife!reader
Requested by: anon ‘Could you write a modern au for tywin lannister x younger wife reader. Maybe they have a Lannister family dinner and its all just chaotic.’
Notes: I didn’t end up doing this as a modern AU, because I found it easier to work with everything in like... Westerosi time frame, but I hope this is okay.
Warnings: older man/younger woman, political/arranged marriage, Joffrey, use of words like slut/whore etc (cheers, Cers), reference to Jaime and Cersei’s incest, awkward family dinner
Gif creds to owner
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“We will be dining in the Queen’s chambers tonight,”
You tensed up, staring straight ahead as you walked through the gardens of the Red Keep with your lord husband. “Am I… in trouble?” You asked softly. You were new to King’s Landing, shipped over from the Vale to marry the Lord of Casterly Rock, and you weren’t quite used to the way King Joffrey’s court worked.
“No. I’ve arranged for us to dine together as a family. You have not properly met my children and grandchildren. You are a Lannister by marriage, you are their mother-in-law, whether they like it or not, and it’s high time we acted like it,” his voice had a bitter edge to it; it hadn’t taken long for Queen Cersei to make her distaste clear. While no one in court would dare insult Tywin Lannister, the girl from the Vale was an easy target for gossip. You had been called every name under the sun, but the Queen’s favourite jibe was ‘whore’.
“Alright,” you murmured, lowering your eyes. You knew there would be no point in arguing. You had quickly learnt that when your husband put his mind to something, there was no turning back. As a few men of the court crossed your path, you felt Tywin’s hand come to rest on the small of your back, and it did not move until you were in the tower of the Hand. You smiled softly as you caught sight of the steaming tub of hot water, scented with sweet oils as you entered your bedroom. “You’ve had this all planned out, haven’t you, my Lord?” You asked, a small smirk gracing your lips. “You should’ve just told my handmaidens to do it in my chambers, to save the walk up all of those stairs,”
Tywin smiled ever-so-slightly. “You’re hardly ever in your own chambers downstairs, wife,” he reminded you.
“Only because you’re the only person I really know in this godforsaken keep, and even then I don’t know you that well. Besides, if I stayed in my own chambers, I’d get lost and end up in the maze of dragon skulls below the keep,”
Tywin smirked, giving you a little push by the small of your back. “Bathe. Wear red, and preferably rubies and gold,” he said sternly. You sighed, knowing Tywin wanted you to dress the part, to look like the Lady of Casterly Rock. You bathed and dried, perfuming your skin and hair before pulling on your smallclothes, calling in your handmaiden to tighten your bodice, then help lace up your dress. It was a deep red, with golden embroidery on the bodice and cuffs that glimmered when you moved, just covering your shoulders and showing the swell of your breasts, and you fastened a pendant around your neck- a golden lion with tiny rubies for its eyes, tongue and claws. You braided back the front of your hair, but let the rest fall down over your shoulders.
You emerged from the room into Tywin’s main office, your hands folded in front of you. He surveyed you briefly before nodding, offering his arm.
**
You sat in silence as you ate, eyes fixed on your plate. Tywin was sat to your left, Jaime to your right. Cersei and Joffrey occupied the heads of the table, and Tyrion sat across from you, in between Myrcella and Tommen.
“More wine, my Lady?” Tyrion said out of the blue, holding up the jug. He gave you a slight smile, knowing how you must feel to be the outcast, like a stranger with the people you were meant to call family.
“I... yes, please. Thank you, my Lord,” you said.
Tyrion smiled as he poured, before filling his own glass. “Just Tyrion will suffice. Let us leave formality at the door,” you smiled slightly and nodded.
“I agree,” said Jaime, earning himself a sharp look from Cersei, who was used to her twin almost always siding with her. “Wasn’t the whole point of this evening to introduce you to us? As a family,” Cersei scoffed into her goblet. “We won’t get very far with ‘my lords’ and ‘my ladies’, will we?”
Tywin nodded his approval at his sons’ attitude and you smiled, beginning to relax a little, though the presence of Cersei and Joffrey kept you on edge. “Tell me, Lady YN, how is the Vale at this time? Have the northerners got their grubby claws on it yet?” Joffrey suddenly asked.
You froze slightly. You were here to talk, yes, but not talk politics. “The Vale... your grace, is not quite like the Reach, or the Riverlands, or even like Winterfell or Casterly Rock,” you said carefully, fully aware of all of the eyes on you. You looked at Tywin, and when he gave you an approving nod, you turned back to the king and continued. “The majority of the Vale is mountain, with the valley you desire buried between them. Even Robb Stark’s best men couldn’t seize it. No one could. To take the Vale, one must take the Eyrie. To take the Eyrie... well... you just couldn’t,” you were happy sharing this fact, as it was known across Westeros that the Eyrie was impenetrable.
“There are other ways to the Eyrie, though. Marriage,” Cersei said. It was the first time she had spoken, and she had a conniving gleam in her eye.
“There is only one heir to the Vale. Jon Arryn was murd-died before he could have any more children. Only little Robert Arryn is the Lord of the Vale, and he’s just past his sixth name day I believe. Besides, his mother is... very protective of her boy. As I’m sure you can understand, your grace, as a mother yourself,” you said cooly. You didn’t know what possessed you to speak that way to the Queen, but something about speaking of your home, your true home filled you with confidence.
“Indeed. There is nothing quite like a mother’s love,” she responded, fixing you with a cold stare.
“I’m unfamiliar, having lost my mother when I was seven,” you said.
“Does the Eyrie really have a trap door that leads nowhere?” Tommen Baratheon suddenly asked, breaking the silence between you and his mother.
You smiled softly at the little boy. How could someone so innocent come from the loins of a beast like Cersei. You supposed some of the good nature came from his father- his true father, that is, Jaime Lannister. “Yes,” you said. “They call it the Moon Door. It’s a big trap door that opens into the sky. If the Lord of the Vale commands, prisoners can be thrown from it,” you stopped, realising quickly how gruesome that must sound to a little boy.
Tommen simply shrugged. “I suppose that must be less messy,” he said, returning his focus to his food. Soon Tommen and Myrcella were bundled off to bed, and Myrcella told you rather sweetly that she liked the way you did your hair.
Once the children were gone, it left only you and Tywin, his three children and the King. Tywin suggested you move away from the dining table to sit and drink wine. Joffrey excused himself, utterly disinterested with continuing on with the evening. You felt a little lighter after he left, although you could feel Cersei staring daggers at you.
“It must feel strange,” Jaime said. “Coming down here from the Vale. I imagine it’s all rather confusing, and daunting,”
“You can say that again,” you said. “I thought I’d just get bundled off to Casterly Rock, never seen or spoken to,”
Tywin laughed slightly. “Come now, wife, we do have some level of decency in this family,” he said. You smiled shyly, looking at your lap. He was often a little more... relaxed after a few glasses of wine.
“Ha!” Cersei said, having also drunk a fair bit. She had been holding her tongue all night, and it seemed now it had loosened. “Once he puts an heir in your belly, you’ll be shipped off to Casterly Rock. And if it’s a girl, you’ll be spared a visit or two, until you give us a son. That’s all you’re here for, that’s all you’re good for,”
You sat up a little straighter, responding before Tywin could. “I am aware of the general concept of political marriages. Your father gets a wife and an heir, my family gets money, or protection or something of the sort. The Seven know, you Lannisters have gold pouring out of your ears,”
“I believe the phrase is that we ‘shit gold,’” Tyrion supplied with a smirk, making you chuckle.
“You think this is a game,” Cersei hissed. “I’ve seen you, prancing around court, dressed in red and gold, following father around like a lost dog! Fluttering about like a common slut,”
“Cersei-” Jaime said lowly.
“No! No! Can’t you see, she has her claws in father the same way Margaery has her claws in Joffrey! And you want me to accept that whore as my mother,”
It was silent. Cersei panted, now standing up. Jaime and Tyrion looked between her and Tywin. Tywin remained stoic, although his eyes revealed the way he seethed. But it was you who spoke first.
“I don’t expect you to accept me as your mother. I am not your mother. Nor will I ever try to be, or call myself that,” you said quietly, contrasting the Queen’s outburst. “I will, however, do my best to serve my husband, to provide him with the heir that is expected of me, the same way you provided King Robert with his heirs,”
Cersei snorted. “I’m sure you do a fine job of serving, you brazen little who-”
“Enough, Cersei!” Tywin finally said, standing up. “Whether you like it or not, I have married YN. She will give me an heir, or two, or more. And she will remain the lady of Casterly rock, no matter how much you protest,”
“She’s not fit to be lady of Casterly rock. She can barely curtsey,” she spat. “You have heirs, father,” she said, almost pleasing. “What need have you for a little whore,”
“I have a son who swore an oath, another who has more interest in wine and whoring, and a daughter who is not nearly as clever and tactical as she thinks she is. Casterly rock will not be left to either of you when I’m gone. It will be left to mine and YN’s son,”
“It could be! It could be left to one of my children,” Cersei hissed.
“One of your children? I wouldn’t put a bastard on the seat of Casterly Rock,” Tywin said cooly. Cersei opened her mouth to argue but Tywin held up his hand. “Give it up, Cersei. You told me yourself, my legacy is a lie. You have had your chance to build the Lannister name. Now it is time for YN and I to rebuild what you have trampled into the ground with your lies and your... acts,” he said with disgust. “And if I so much as hear the words whore or slut to describe my wife, I will resign as hand, withdraw my knights and my gold, as well as that of the Vale and leave you to pick up the pieces of this kingdom that I have been holding together. Perhaps you could learn a thing or two from the Tyrells. Come YN,” he said, turning away from his daughter and resting his hand on your waist, guiding you out of the Queens chambers and back to the tower of the hand, not giving you a chance to curtsey to the Queen.
As the door slammed shut, Tyrion drained the rest of his wine and clapped his hands as he stood. “Well. That went well,”
Tags: @sociallyawkward-princess @lazyotakujen
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angelkurenai · 3 years
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Oh baby dear - Chris Evans x Reader
Title: Oh baby dear
Pairing: Chris Evans x Surrogate!Reader
Warnings: None
Summary: After a trip that gives the chance to Chris to take a long-overdue break from his job, he comes back home with his mind made up to change his life. And even if it weren’t for the trip itself or meeting you, even though he had no idea if he’d ever see you again, he was determined to not wait any longer. Feeling ready to become a father he starts looking for a surrogate mother, only to end up finding you of all people.
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“Son of a guy. You meant it.” brown eyes were wide, and for the first couple seconds no other sound could be heard in the room. It almost felt like the words could echo in the room.
“You're really doing this.” the man's voice was filled with just as much shock as was painted all over his face. At least the woman behind him was more calm, sipping on her drink with an ease that would have been troubling, especially in such a case, if it wasn't known that she had long ago heard the news.
“I wouldn't have brought it up in the first place if I wasn't seriously considering it.” the other man in the room couldn't take his eyes off his friend, trying to gauge his reaction the second it came through. It was bound to be the most honest one, no second thoughts, and he only needed his friends' honest thoughts. Not that, and he was sure of it, the other man would intentionally tell him anything but the truth.
“You- wow.” the shocked expression was still there but there was no mistaking the smile that was slowly but surely appearing on his face “Seems like Evans is finally joining the club, who'd have thought? That's what I call one heck of a year, quickly Scarlett note the date down! It's going to go down in the history books, I tell you. Oh you're in for one hell of a ride, buddy! Wait you knew about this, didn't you?” he turned to the woman but shook his head soon enough “Never mind. You're gonna have to look for a godmother but I do get to be the godfather, right? I really need to start making preparations, nine months are not even remotely enough. I gotta-”
“Take a deep breath and calm down, Robert. That's what you gotta do. Otherwise this kid won't get to meet its one-of-a-kind godfather. And we would never want that to happen, would we?” the woman interrupted his rambling, a teasing smile on her own lips as she noticed Chris himself chuckle.
“Oh goodness forbid that could ever happen.” Chris laughed some more, his chest feeling lighter than it had in the past couple days “And besides that, there has not been a surrogate found just yet. Papers got approved only a day ago, it will take more time than that.”
“You say that as if the second every woman finds out you're on that kind of market, won't volunteer to have your baby. Heck, I know most of them would gladly volunteer to do it the old-fashioned way! You'll see, you will be getting news very soon.” Robert brushed his friend off and got up from his seat, making his way to the mini bar to grab a drink for himself “Which means, I really gotta start preparing everything because a) this is Evans' kid and b) I'm the godfather and it'll get only the best!”
Scarlett couldn't help but laugh, while Chris shook his head with a chuckle, before she added “As you can see, he is going to be more trouble than the kid.” she ignored the look that was shot at her from Robert and kept going “But, speaking of it, I never asked: Did you never really consider adoption?”
“For most of the time that's what I had in mind, yes, but-” he sighed, easing back in his seat “I asked about it and my chances were sadly very low, given my job and everything, not to mention how lengthy of a process it all was. Sebastian was actually the one to suggest it and you know I haven't been able to stop thinking about it ever since. Granted, it is just as hard to find a surrogate who is also willing to be the biological mother but I feel like I have more to hope for this way.”
“You have every reason to be hopeful, I'm sure this will work out just fine. Besides-” she offered her friend a warm smile “There is no other man that I can think of that could be a better father than you. This child will be very lucky.”
“...The part of Robert being the godfather excluded?” Chris added with a smirk, eyeing his friend who narrowed his eyes at him, before both Chris and Scarlett burst into laughter.
“Life isn't perfect, what can you do?” she grinned as she took a sip of her drink.
“I'll try to be the better man, as always, and not comment on any spiteful comments against me. You're just jealous I am going to be the world's best godfather. Anyway, that wasn't what I was going to comment on.” he plopped back on his seat and gave the blue-eyed man a sly smile “Sebastian you say but I'm wondering: was it him or that summer trip to Italy that really prompted you to become a dad? Maybe a certain someone you met there? What was her name...”
“Don't-” it was all he had time to get out, his eyes wide and voice very warning; but there was never any stopping the man when he wanted to speak his mind.
“Ah yes.” Robert grinned widely “(Y/n).”
“What- Who?” Scarlett frowned, tilting her head to the side “How come I haven't heard of her before? I thought you told me everything about Italy.”
“She's nobod-”
“Probably the love of his life. Something like his soulmate. One he talks about a lot in his sleep, hence why I should hold more parties and have you guys over. The info I get is golden. Anyway, think of it as the star-crossed lovers but one where he isn't the Lana Del Rey young and beautiful, you know? Heard she's something like a med or psych graduate or something. So come to think of it all, Italy, soulmates and age difference, this is like another version of Call me by your-”
“And that's it for you. Enough words spoken for one day.” Scarlett said, not hesitating a second to place a hand over the man's mouth who admittedly didn't give up even if his words were only an incoherent mumble after that.
Chris' eyes were wide and there was no mistaking the way he wanted to not talk about it, as if there was some unparalleled sadness that came with the mention of your name, a deep ache and at the same time yearning perhaps because he missed you, just like there was no mistaking the tint of pink that was on his cheeks.
“That's-” he cleared his throat, avoiding looking at his friends in the eyes because he knew how easy it would be to tell that even so many months later the feelings were fresh as much as the day he had to leave, the day he left a part of himself on the airport with you – a part he knew real well he wouldn't get back again, certainly not from any other woman he got to meet. That missing part of him, even if the rest held all the beautiful memories dearly to itself and felt truly blessed, he knew was obvious. It was all on his face that he was missing something, even if he'd gotten so much. And he knew she would see it, it all became so obvious when he thought of you.
He shook his head when he realized he had taken longer than needed to reply “It was way too long ago, I can hardly remember it now. Hell, as if barely anything happened to begin with. She was just-” a lump in his throat, too painful “I made a good friend, a really good friend yes, who helped me see my life in a different way. Helped me make my choice and see the things that really matter. Couldn't keep in contact and yes that's a bit sad but- That's all there is to it, nothing more nothing less.”
Scarlett regarded him for a couple seconds, even as he tried to keep himself busy with getting another drink, before she finally spoke “If you say so.” she nodded her head “At least we now know who we owe this to and who to thank for our family growing, don't we?”
“Then-” Robert's smile was softer, yet also sad, as he raised his glass a bit “Let's drink to that, if not your baby just yet. To (Y/n)?”
“To (Y/n).” Scarlett nodded her head “For helping you make the best decision of your life, wherever she may be now.”
Chris hesitated, the unspoken truth of you not only being the one to help him make the decision but also be part of that decision, part of the family he wanted to build, was ready to break free from his lips but he held it back “Wherever she may be.” he said in a low hoarse voice, raising his glass as well “To (Y/n).”
He had not allowed himself to say your name in a long time and thinking back to it, the effect had been evident not only in his chest, in his heartbeat, but also in his lips, how painfully strange it felt when all he had been doing was think about it for months to no end, down to his throat that closed up with emotion. And he had allowed himself to say it not only so that he would make sure his friends would drop the subject but also because it had been a long time, he felt the need to and he knew that he wouldn't get the chance to do so, not anytime soon for sure.
And yet, only seconds ago, the name had left his lips for the second time in barely a couple days.
His brain could barely keep up with the fact, all the information he had to currently process seemed to make things even harder. Saying your name this time certainly had the same effect, his throat closed up and his heart leaped to his throat, but it felt like it was for an entirely different reason. He blinked several times, trying to make sure that what he was seeing was also true, to make sure that it wasn't wishful thinking and that him holding his breath had not reduced the levels of oxygen to a point where he couldn't even see straight. Truth be told, he felt pretty lightheaded.
“(Y/n) (Y/l/n).” he repeated your name for the third time, the third time in only a couple days his mind nearly screamed at him, but it didn't feel the same this time.
“Yes, I would say she seems like one of the most, if not the most, suitable candidate for you case.” the woman behind the desk gave him a warm smile but his brain was still currently stuck on the word 'candidate'.
“I'm sorry. There seems to be some misunderstanding here and I- I don't know whose part it is on, but-” he licked his lips, trying to swallow over the lump in his throat “When you say- What you're trying to say- I'm sorry.” he shook his head and let a couple seconds to pass in silence; he knew she wouldn't ask before him.
Taking a deep breath he decided to speak, even if his voice was hoarse he hoped she could make out the words “Candidate for what?”
The woman frowned a bit but it was gone faster than it could register, as she spoke in a calm voice “Your case. To be not only the surrogate you are looking for. See, her current, and according to her permanent from now on, residence is in New York City and very close to the residence you have listed as your permanent one. It is important, you understand, if we take into consideration that she will be the biological mother of the child. You might want the child to be able to stay in touch with her, and vice versa, so the close proximity does help. Of course that is always up to you, but in most cases we've seen it hap-”
“When did she sign up for this?” he asked, barely able to keep himself to wait for her to finish her sentence.
“Pardon?” she blinked and only then he realized how he might have sounded.
“You're right. I apologize, that came out as wrong.” he cleared his throat again “What I mean is... does she know who I am? That she- she's signing up to be a surrogate for my child.”
“Every surrogate must be informed, of course, of you as you are informed of her. She too must know whose child she will carry, don't you think it's fitting? But if you are uhm-” she hesitated “Concerned about other children, then, you need not worry. It's not my place to say this but it seems like-” she smiled a bit, almost knowingly “That you have already chosen, so I believe it wouldn't really be against any rule to say this. Consider it an extra bit of information.”
'Seems like you have already chosen.' would be a vast understatement. It was like every cell in his body was screaming 'Yes', chanting it over and over again that he was seriously worried he might have projected it somehow. He could barely control the words that came out of his lips anyway. If anything, the second he had come across the file with your name he had been glued to it, his eyes and all of his attention orbiting around the single file as if he was Earth and you were his Sun. Not far from the truth either.
But it also must have shown- No scratch that. He was sure it had shown because he had done no effort to hide it, too stunned and happy and eager and giddy and blessed and so many other things, to try to hide it. And she had clearly noticed.
“So, no, she has not mothered another child. As a matter of fact, Miss (Y/l/n) is doing this for the first time.” the woman leaned back in her chair “She came to us with the belief that there was too much sadness out there and, amongst other things, she decided to do this little one thing to help someone out. To make someone happy. I believe she didn't really have any further expectations out of this, no further plans, other than wanting to do some good. We only informed her of your case and she said she'd like to help, nothing else.” she shrugged softly “For any further reasons behind her choice you could ask her, I suppose. If you do think she could be the right choice to be the mother of your child, then-”
“She is.” he said, maybe a little too fast, but he didn't care. He didn't find a single part of him that cared for how eager he looked at the prospect of you being the mother of his child. Granted, it wasn't exactly how he'd imagined it but it was so much more than he ever thought he'd get, of what he thought he deserved, when he had told you goodbye that summer.
He cleared his throat again, trying to straighten his back and look as formal as he should in the suit he was wearing. He offered her a small smile “She is the right one. I think I've decided. I-” he paused, glancing at the pile of files and therefore other candidates which he had absolutely not even taken a glimpse at and he hoped she wouldn't comment on it “I've thought things through, yes.” because no man could make such a decision so hastily, he knew, and yet he looked like he just had “I'm glad for all the candidates it means a lot but uhm Miss (Y/l/n) seems to be indeed the right one. I think she will do just fine yes.”
“Wonderful.” she smiled more, nodding her head “If it means anything, she seemed happy when she was presented with your case.” oh if only she knew just how much it really meant to him, ask his wildly-beating heart and everyone would know just how much “Now, you understand that while you seem pretty sure and confident with your choice, you will have to give it some more time, more than anything to get in touch with the surrogate herself and discuss through any specific terms you might have. We will be the ones to set a meeting. Of course there are legal issues that need to be taken care of, but you're a lawyer yourself so you probably know that better than anybody else already.”
“Y-yes uh of course, yes, legal terms. Mr Wilson will represent me on the matter of course. But you said-” he folded his hands over his lap and threaded his fingers and it was either that or let his nerves show “Meeting her? Will I get to meet her in person soon or...?”
“That, Mr Evans, is completely up to you, how ready and sure you are, how much time you need and how fast you want things to progress.” she said as if she'd had this conversation many times over and she probably had “It could be within a week, a month, or, if you have no doubts, within three days the soonest possible. So, do you need time to think over-”
“The soonest possible. I'd like-” he nodded his head, straightening his suit's jacket “I think it would be best if I could meet with her the soonest possible. She's just what I was looking for.”
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