#but friends???? romantic partners???

[vstheworld]

realizing romcoms overutilize the montage because figuring out how you portray all the little intricacies of how two people fall in love is fucking. difficult.

#look I’m trying to write #but there’s a comment on one of my fics going ‘I guess I just don’t see how they’d wind up together’ #and that has sent me into this insane spiral of like #how DO you fall in love? it’s a thousand things. it’s nothing #it takes forever and no time at all #I’ve been with my partner for ten years I should honestly have experience but it’s still baffling to me #I can write fuckbuddies #that’s so easy #but friends???? romantic partners??? #long term relationships???? #people genuinely caring about each other???? #so hard #cash writes #cash has a crisis #text post #writeblr

[inkskinned]

in internet posts it is easy to cut them out of your life. they are hurting you! they aren't listening to you!

they held your hair back. they lent you lipstick. they held your hand at the train station and got you home safe. they rounded on your bully, got loud, said get fucked, spitting-mad in your defense.

they also cut the hair off again. told you that you should really think twice before wearing something like that. took you for granted. took your insecurities and threw them in your face again.

you know logically it should be easy. all the internet advice comments always read it will feel better. like an equation - if a person is rotten, you just remove them. you pull the tooth that's hurting.

but it was never a big flare-up moment. you don't live in a sitcom. they never tried to take your boyfriend or steal from your apartment. they showed up to birthdays and they wrote songs about you and bring you water without you asking. once you found out they carry an emergency inhaler for you, even though you haven't had an asthma attack in years - just in case.

where is the line? people fuck up. sometimes they fuck up badly. sometimes people have raw personalities, like a powerline, and being around them is dangerous. addicting. sometimes they can't help themselves, but you know they're trying. sometimes they are just rough-around-the-edges. sometimes they don't even realize how they sounded when they said that. sometimes it's just - you've both loved each other for so long now, the way this thing hurts goes back to the root.

and that's the fucked up part. you have pushed your fingers against the sweetheart of memory. things these days are electric, tense, harrowing. they didn't used to be. there were a lot of good days in there. sometimes you want to just close your eyes and say can this be over yet? do we still need to be fighting?

doing that would give up any chance you get of getting an apology, but you don't always know that you need an apology, you love them. once they flaked on your birthday party. once they told you to get over it, people are always dying. they also let you crash on their couch for a week after the breakup, handfeeding you when you were so sad you couldn't eat. they are also judgmental about everything, occasionally react to banal statements with an attitude that is weird and fiery. they also love you like a lighthouse sometimes, so strong they cut the storm like lightning.

but the problem is that you might be storm. you might be the thing that needs breaking. what if you are two forces who are desperately, horribly drawn to each other, shaped by the other person's passions, and both good for each other and bad in equal measure.

what if you're both just people, and you're no saint neither.

just cut them off! swallowing the saltwater, you catch yourself in the mirror. you've been shaking more than usual. there's an ache in you that is oblique, loud, impossible to soothe. is this what it looks like? when life is "easier"?

your mouth will always have a hole, is the thing, if you remove the tooth.

#spilled ink #warm up #writeblr #this is about someone specific but feel free to blorbo on main. #tbh this is familial for me so that is an element but it's also about childhood best friends #and probably about ur enemies to lovers blorbo #(but i want to specifically say if ur partner is like this. not necessarily a good partnership lol.) #(the dynamics at play in familial/friend relationships feel equally important and in some ways are HARDER to escape. #bc we can see that this is a potentially toxic romantic foundation. #but in family ? ...... it's toxic and it doesn't stop u from loving them. bc u always have. #and i think that makes it harder. by a lot. which is what this is referencing). #but genuinely and really truly forever feel free to tag ur potentially toxic enemies to lovers on this and all my poetry #here i'll do one for u - adora & catra :x

[radiance1]

Danny: Hey, I need you to be my boyfriend for a week.

Jason: What.

Danny: My parents are coming over and I've apparently accidentally talked about a partner more than once and only realized when they said they wanted to meet them.

Jason, currently still solidifying his power as a Crime Lord: Excuse me?

Danny: Let me get this out of the way, I do not consider you at all a person of romantical interest and a friend. But I need you to act as my partner for only a week until my parents go on their merry way over to my sister, okay?

Jason: Is there, quite literally, no one else to ask this?

Danny: You're my only friend who lives in Gotham, plus we share the same apartment.

Jason: That's almost sad.

Danny: You in?

Jason: Sure, why not.

===

Maddie: Danny, honey.

Danny: Yes mom?

Maddie: I don't mean to.... question, who you choose as your parent but. Well, me and your father was just wandering if he was a... [Maddie gestures with her hand] you know, one of those.

Danny, uncomprehendingly staring at his mother's hand: What.

Maddie: Oh dear, how do I bring this up. You know, one of those.

Danny: Mother I need more context.

Jack: If your boyfriend a crime lord!?

Maddie: Jack!

Jack: What? Beating around the bush wasn't helping!

Danny: Say WHAT?

===

Danny: Hey dude, thanks for helping with this even though you didn't need to!

Jason: No problem, I wasn't doing anything too [Crime Lord activities flash through his mind] important.

Danny: Can you believe my parents thought you were a crime lord though? Weird am I right?

Jason:

Danny: Jason. You are scaring me.

Jason: Haha, yea that's weird isn't it?

Danny: Jason.

Jason: Well, I have to leave now to attend to my totally real and totally not crime related job at the ice cream shop.

Danny: [Squints eyes]

Jason: [Internally sweating bullets]

Danny: Suuuuure, bring me back some ice cream though.

Jason: [Thumbs up and leaves]

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #dcxdp #dc x dp crossover #Danny isn't romantically interested in Jason in the least #Neither is Jason romantically interested in Danny #But he needed a partner and Jason was the only one available #Jason somehow managed to balance that and being a crime lord #Jack and Maddie instantly had the suspicion of him being Red Hood aka a crime lord aka a criminal aka a danger to their boy #Danny doesn't know at ALL though and so they hang that theory up because if Danny didn't know then he probably wasn't a crime lord #Jason's identity was almost blown because he pretended to be the boyfriend of his friend #Again Danny doesn't know shit about him being Red Hood he just thought dude was dedicated to his job plus its Gotham #Not that weird to come back with scraps and scratches

[redysetdare]

enough stories about how someone learns to truely be happy through love. i want a story where someone is desperately seeking out love thinking it's the only way to be happy only for them to learn by the end that happiness is what they make of it and they don't need love at all to make it.

#aro #aromantic #ace #asexual #aroace #loveless aro #loveless #non-partnering #nonpartnering #non partnering #nonamorous #aplatonic #enough of amatonormative tropes in media!!! enough 'you're miserable without love' stories!!! #less “you're too focused on ambitions to make you happy that you dont let yourself fall in love” #more “you're too focused on finding love to make you happy that you wont let yourself live” #more “there is so much more to life than love and so much more that can bring your happiness if you just let yourself experience it.” #maybe I should write this story #and when i say love i mean all love. not just romantic love. #which is why i tagged aplatonic too #while i mostly see this trope in terms of romantic love i think there's something to be said about #telling stories where people are perfectly content alone too #it doesn't have to be sad or pathetic to not have friends by choice. they dont have to be a miserable person to not have friends #i think we need more variety in stories where it shows people just content in their lack of love or relationships in all shapes #not everyone wants a family not everyone wants friends not everyone wants a partner not everyone wants love #some of us are content without. that should be explored without the need to fix it.

[silvermoon424]

I'm so fucking sick of amatonormativity dude. Someone on Reddit left a comment that was basically like "the majority of people need a romantic relationship to be happy, it's how we're wired" and I responded saying that I disagreed and that more and more people (especially women) are finding fulfillment in other relationships and are happy being single.

I got heavily downvoted.

Of course most people like being in a committed relationship, but you don't have to be aromantic or asexual to enjoy being single. Maybe more people would like being single if we as a culture stopped pushing the narrative (especially on women) that being single is lonely, horrible, and depressing and that you need a romantic partner to be a complete person.

#amatonormativity is so insidious and prevalent and most people don't even realize they've fallen for the propaganda #like of course having a life partner is very important to a lot of people #but can we PLEASE stop acting like almost everyone is 'wired' for a monogamous romantic/sexual relationship #and people always fall back on 'well humans are social creatures we need to have relationships' #bitch I have my friends and family and colleagues what relationships am I lacking #amatonormativity #aromantic #aromantism #arospec #aspec #asexual #aroace #aphobia #1k

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Bonus 8: How met your mother (CSSR design by @qourmet!)

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #cangse sanren #wei changze #jiang fengmian #It was important to me that WCZ had the hereditary mole. I will die on this hill. #I have been *waiting* for the day to finally arrive when I could finally make this comic. It's been marinating for months. #My mission is to redraw all of qour's character designs one day. They are just *that* good. #CSSR has the vibes of a wandering menace who shows up in towns like a stray cat arriving at a new doorstep for treats. 10/10. #While YZY strongly leads us to believe that JFM was in love with CSSR and that's his whole motivation behind taking wwx in- #-I do think this is (once again) rumour being presented as reality. It's the juicer story to tell after all. #It is still possible that he did love her! But I think that story undercuts the relationship he also had with WCZ. #Yall ever think about how JC and WWX parallel their fathers? How Wei Changze also left the Jiang Leader's side? I do. #Unlike JC though It is far more hilarious and plausible to imagine JFM begging to be CSSR and WCZ's third. You know he would. #My wild headcanon is that JFM and YZY are in a mlm and wlw arranged marriage situation. Deeply unhappy as partners. Better as friends. #they care for each other and I'll admit that there is a beautiful tragedy in them having romantic feelings for each other the whole time. #But I am also here for the gaffs. Let them be unfulfilled homosexuals together. #Meanwhile cssr and wcz are having incredible hetrosexual sex in a bisexual way that WILL leave him pregnant by the end of it.

[knifearo]

like it's honestly kind of ridiculous at this point

#worst quality meme i've ever made in my life but i had to get this image out of my head and onto the internet #anyway. looks at tax brackets. looks at nuclear family. looks at heteronormativity. #looks at social expectation of partnering. looks at divorce rate. looks at unhappy marriages. #looks at friends abandoning friends for new romantic relationships. looks at 'just friends' and 'more than friends'. #looks at the societal association between morality and love. looks at anti-sex sentiments. looks at— #and it stole my lunch money too #amatonormativity #aromantic #aromanticism #arospec #aroace #aspec #talking

[fatgirldangerousworld]

your weight doesn’t determine how lovable you are

#things I would’ve said to little kid me #relevant to parents/caregivers/friends/romantic partners/your relationship with yourself

[introspectivememories]

nah because crofty is genuinely insane because why would you say that about your coworker???? and to his face??? "this man knows lewis hamilton. friends, teammates, childhood buddies, rivals, everything but a lover." hello???? why are you saying that to nico rosberg's face???? why are you, as the lead f1 commentator, writing fanfiction about your coworker???? about him and his ex???? and also, what an insane thing to say about someone else's relationship!!! "everything but a lover"... just show them having gay sex onscreen, it would be less intimate than whatever the hell you just said.

#it's been almost 3 years since that happened and yet i still rotate that moment in my head like a rotisserie chicken #'everything but a lover'.... what a terribly intimate thing to say about another person #like isn't that more romantic than actually being someone's partner??? they are everything to you but a romantic interest #wow... they are your friend your brother the little butterflies in your stomach... everything and anything but a lover #because like you can live without a lover but can you live without the tender smile your friend gives you when something good happens? #can you live without the hugs and the shared podiums and the shared dreams and greece? #also imagine lewis coming home and eciding to watch a recap of the race and then crofty just says this... like what the fuck do you even sa #i just /know/ that the industry is scheming to bring them back together again bc what else could this have been? #david croft #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #brocedes #f1

[dollopheadsandclotpoles]

Due to that post I made re: why it's hard for aros/aces to imagine a future for themselves because society tells you a romantic partner will always take priority, a lot of people (aros/aces and allos alike) are sharing stories about how they have been discarded by their close friends and it's breaking my heart. But allos and aspecs coming in and sharing how they have the same amount of love for their partners and their best friends/siblings is healing it.

Still, there are people in the tags saying that aros/aces can "never offer their partners the kind of intimacy they need" and so they shouldn't be "surprised" when they feel closer to partners than their friends. You guys are missing the point.

The point is that we should NOT be ranking our relationships. People aren't there to be ranked on a scale of "This person is my number one and this person comes after that." The point is that you need multiple people in your life. One person cannot - and should not - be responsible for giving you everything you need. Different people will give you different things that you need in life and you should value all of them.

The idea that a romantic partner will give you every single thing you need in life is a toxic idea in itself and puts undue pressure on said partner and the relationship as a whole. A best friend won't give you everything either. You NEED multiple people in your life and they will all give you a part of what you need, but there is no one perfect person out there who perfectly gives you exactly what you want. We need multiple people and they should all be valued by you. Love is not limited.

#aro stuff #ace stuff #aroace tag #aro #ace #aromanticism #asexuality #aromantic #asexual #aroace #This idea that a romantic partner comes before everything and everyone else is a very Western idea too #I'm grateful that I live in a culture where family and community are important parts of life. #I'm lucky that my best friend considers me as important as her husband #i'm lucky that I'm close to my family and have unconditional love from them #why do I have to rank the relationships in my life #a mother with two kids can love and prioritise them equally #as my own mother does #why is it impossible for some of you to imagine doing that with other relationships in your life? #(i wrote this when I was sleepy and wrote unrequited love instead of unconditional love i'm so dumb lol #i do return my family's love)

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Tim I just want to talk about your word choice.

Why use coupling rather than pairing? Why??!!!

#coupling has such a specific intent implied - it automatically makes one thing relationship #where as pairing is more suggestive of friends or work partners etc #you only really describe romantic partners as a couple not besties! #911 spoilers #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #911 abc #911 s7

[apollos-boyfriend]

the jaiden-roier-cellbit dynamic is so important to me because like. cellbit treats jaiden and roier's relationship with the same level of respect and importance that jaiden treats roier and cellbit's marriage. which may not seem like that big of a thing but like. platonic relationships are often seen as "lesser" than romantic ones, and that your romantic partner should come first before all other bonds in your life. and seeing cellbit treat jaiden and roier's bond and relationship with the same respect that jaiden treats his marriage. as an arospec person it genuinely makes me want to sob

#icarus speaks #THEY ARE THE BLUEPRINT!!!!!!! #THE MOMENT THE EVERYTHING #everything about them in general is so. like some of THE healthiest treatment of aspec relationships ive ever seen #the fact that roier is hypersexual but cellbit is aspec. and there is no conflict with this. sex does not define their relationship #the fact that Everyone acknowledges the importance of roier and jaiden's relationship #they're seen as partners just as much as any of the romantic egg pairings #just. wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh #personally i was struggling a bit with acknowledgement of being aroace. bc a Lot of my friends have been getting into relationships #and i Know that there is a possibility Of me being the lesser of the two options bc romance is so prioritized #but seeing these three gives me so much hope #i hope they know how important they are to the aroace/aroacespectrum community :((

[crimeronan]

one big thing about polyshipping for me is, like. you know how some people will have their eyes opened to homoerotic relationships in media bc they'll realize, "wait, if these people were two different genders, i'd 100% assume they're into each other. i have a double standard that i never noticed"?

there's a polyamorous equivalent in certain media that's basically just. "if you didn't assume this character is monogamous, you would 100% believe they have crushes on & are dating all of their friends." OR, "if this character wasn't dating somebody else already, you would 100% interpret this new friendship of theirs as a crush/budding romance."

usually the creators of the media aren't thinking about polyamory when they make it! usually the creators of the media are thinking "i want this character's friends to be as important to them as their romantic partners, we don't get enough of that in media," which is great and true and also EXACTLY WHY IT WORKS AS A POLY NARRATIVE. people will be like you don't Have to polyship why can't you just let platonic relationships be important ugh 🙄 & i'm like i did my years in the "why can't two men just be friends why does everything have to be gay 🙄" trenches. you're not doing this to me. we're not doing it about polyshipping. we're skipping over that whole discourse cutscene because i am Too Tired For It. don't even start

sometimes characters are so full of love and affection and joy for so many people that i start gnawing off my hands about how polyamory isn't normalized. because i'll watch/read certain media and i'll be like. listen. this is a polycule. i know you don't know this because your creators don't know this and that is totally okay but you are a Wildly polyamorous person who's ambiguously trapped in the 2000s/2010s with Big Monogamy psyops eating your brain. please let me free you. please i can give you Everything .

PLEASE KISS YOUR FRIENDS

#what i'd give for more mainstream toh art of the lavender winter quartet that doesnt pair them off together ignoring the others in favor of #their canon romantic partner. what i'd give for explorations of relationships between close friends that arent just #'we have convos about how much we love our canon romantic partners who arent here 💕' #LIKE IT'S CUTE AND HARMLESS. BUT IT MAKES ME FEEL SO LONELYYY #most days i'm fine with no one in mainstream fandom loving the way i do or feeling the way i do. #then some days i wake up thinking about hunter and luz being each other's Types (TM) and feel like ive eaten drywall #aside from the trc ot6 theres like NO polycule that's more desperately 'YOU GUYS WOULD BE CANONICALLY ALL TOGETHER IN A DIFFERENT TIME #PERIOD' than lavwin. IT TORTURES ME. THEY ARE ALL IN LOVE #anyway. i gotta get some more sleep. #thanks for listening everyone. think about the big monogamy psyops in your life and add people to their relationships. it's hilarious

[14106]

he cannot sleep he can(not) dream 2nite 😨

commission for 1 of my best friends on fb <3 sth sth jack and sally

#disco elysium #mine #kimharry #even tho at first it wasnt.... #sth abt harry getting into a relationship while still learning to let go sth abt yelling sad songs while crying and thinkin abt ur ex #sth abt best friends being there no matter what sth abt romantic partners having the patience to see you grow and let go #whatever girl... do u get me #ah hes readin the lyrics ig lol #harry du bois #kim kitsuragi

[demigods-posts]

percy and annabeth's depature on mount saint helens affected them both very deeply, and i love for the show to capitalize on it. specifically, during percy's return to camp. i loved to see him fixate on annabeth rushing toward him amidst a crowd of campers. i'd love to see annabeth hug percy so hard, he stumbles backward. i'd love to see percy wraps his arms around her waist in tearful relief that she made it out alive. and i'd especially love to see the surrounding campers fall silent at their reunion because something definitely happened between those two.

#logically i know that percy and annabeth's tearful reunion isn't a guarantee of romantic subtext #because friends can miss each other just as intensely #but i do think having the surrounding campers react to their reunion with looks that read 'one of them finally made a move on the other' #further cements the obvious tension between these two as future romantic partners #and i also love this story trope #sue me #percy jackson and the olympians #pjo #pjo text post #pjo headcanon #percy jackson #annabeth chase #percabeth #percabeth headcanon #percabeth angst #percabeth fluff

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

I gotta say I do absolutely adore that Fig Faeth who’s entire relationship with romance up to that point is tied to deception finds her match with a person whose defining trait is her honesty

#like Fig has never kissed anyone as herself before Ayda she’s always trying to at least convince her friends she’s hiding her emotions #her life is completely upturned by her parents’ romantic relationship imploding because of a deception by her mom #and the loving partner she finds is someone who will always be candid with her #I’m really going insane over figayda tonight they’re just so perfect for eachother #I need Ayda to come back in Junior Year like I know in my heart it’s gonna happen but I need it to happen sooner #dimension 20 #d20 #fantasy high #fhsy #figayda #ayda aguefort #spilling the Tea