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mrpenguinpants · 3 years

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Albedo HCs: Coming Home [Christmas Celebration 🎉]

For the Christmas Celebration Requests, please read this [we have 2 more days but I’ll possibly extend the deadline to Jan 10. I’m tackling all the Mondstadt rq first before moving onto Liyue]

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Ohhh, I love idea a lot (might have gone overboard anon haha). No worries about being specific, I love getting specific requests. I just finished a super depressing fic and I’m back at it again. Though I will do my best to make this one happy because that Mona fic hurt me. But I’m glad to hear you love my writing haha 💕💕

I also know nothing about Albedo and have never written this man in my life but I’m going to ignore everything because these are happy hours. I love his man so much so this is some self-indulgent stuff (if you couldn’t tell from the word count) istg hcs have turned into fics just without the dialogue. I took many liberties lol what the hell is formatting?

Also, shoutout to @asheseiler A beautiful human being that started chatting with me because we both love Childe haha. But seriously, I appreciate you 💕💕💕

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[taglist] <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@hanniejji @mikeysbike @unionwitch @musekala @twistedsunnshiii @stanzastic @akaasea @xoneaboveallx @adoring-ghost @asheseiler @childelover

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Albedo HCs: Coming Home

As you finally reached the hill top by the Stone Gate, you could just make out the stone walls of the City of Freedom in Mondstadt. You were almost there and the butterfly’s racing through your stomach only seemed to fly faster. You had been on a long trip away by travelling between Liyue and Inazuma. From practicing your alchemy to finding new secrets, it had been awhile since you last saw Mondstadt. While it had been fun going from place to place and seeing all the new arts and techniques, you couldn’t stop the feeling of loneliness of not having an occasionally smug but talented ash blond companion at your side.

You hadn’t seen Albedo since Master Rhinedottir had left and sent Albedo to Mondstadt with a letter of recommendation. You travelled with him to the City of Freedom but you only stayed for a few nights before you departed to Liyue. Your master had different plans for you and you didn’t know how long your own journey would take but you both promised to stay in touch through letters.

He was now acting as the Chief Alchemist and Captain of the Investigation Team of the Knights of Favonius. He managed to get a lab from Alice and he even had an assistant named Sucrose. He sent over some sketches for you and even if the bottom half of “Sucrose” was just a stick figure, you were happy that he wasn’t alone and cooped up in his lab all the time. You were, however, worried about these “Klee disasters” but happy that he still had the energy to write to you. At first it was hard, you found yourself talking to the air as if Albedo was still there but even after all these years, you couldn’t help but miss him. The occasional letter you received did help to lighten the mood however and you always made sure to store them carefully.

It seemed that your dapping mood was noticeable because even the ever stoic Zhongli asked if you were okay. He was nice and easy to talk to, even if he had a problem with Mora that you sometimes had to bail him out off, but you trusted him so you explained to him your growing loneliness. Which he simply replied that if you missed someone, you should go see them.

So here you are right outside the gates. The knights at the front were nice enough and let you through with ease once they checked that you didn’t have anything destructive. Now the hard part was actually finding Albedo. The knights had mentioned that despite being a highly respectable alchemist and one of the Captains, no one really knew where he was most of the time. Originally, you were thinking of planning some sort of surprise, even had made an entire game plan, but now that you were here. You just wanted to tackle the man, pride be damned.

You began to wander around the city, in comparison to Liyue it was quite small but so much more lively and warm. Christmas was right around the corner so everyone was rushing around hanging up lights and finding presents but it was nice. Everyone seemed to know each other and unlike Liyue, you didn’t need to be afraid if the walls were listening. You looked around for a man with bright teal eyes and ashy light blond hair, even asking around, but no luck. No one seemed to know where he was and if he was even in Mondstadt right now. You were beginning to loose hope and that your trip might have been in vain when you felt a small tap on your shoulder and-

Sweet jesus, what the fuck?

You were almost jealous at how good he looked now. He was always handsome when you were both younger but now it felt like cupid decided to descend from the heavens, laugh at you, then riddled you full of arrows. Was your pulse working? Brain still computing? You knew you had a small crush on Albedo when you were younger- who were you kidding, you were in love with this man since he helped you create cecilia flowers from a dead denro slime - but this was just unfair!

“Albedo! I was looking around everywhere for you. This place is actually a lot bigger than it se-”

“You’re back.”

Albedo was surprised to see that it was really you. He only caught a small glimpse of your profile but he knew it was you. He almost suspected that his vision was tricking him or that he might have accidently set one of his sketches of you to life but you were here. Albedo has always treated friendships with a constant degree of distance, always working or traveling to gathering materials to avoid social interactions even if it wasn’t intentional. He also had no memory of any family, only adventuring deep within the domains with his master and you. But when his Master left with one assignment left for him he couldn’t help but feel a bit hollow, but you were always there to lift his spirits up even if on the outside he didn’t appear upset.

But then you had left and gone on your own journey.

“Hm? Oh, sorry I didn’t mention it in my last letter. It was a bit of an impulse trip. But I’m not intruding in on anything right? You’re happy to see me...right?”

“You’re here.”

At first he was alright with it, even encouraged you to set off to Liyue since it was the closest. Promising that you would both keep in touch even if he found relationships a taxing cycle. But when a few months had passed and it began to settle in that you weren’t anywhere near him. That he couldn’t talk to you about new discoveries, that he couldn’t hear you voice anymore, that he had even forgotten how to sketch you. It felt...weird. He knew what he was feeling was loneliness, he wasn’t deluded or naïve, but even when he had Sucrose or Timaeus it wasn’t the same. But now you were here. He could see you and how the lines in his sketchbook were wrong whenever he attempted to re-create you. He could feel your warmth that sketches he brought to life couldn’t do. He could feel your presence and how it slowly but surely filled the void in him until it was bursting at the seams.

“Albedo? Are you alright?”

“You’re here.”

You were almost afraid that the holidays had broke Albedo. You knew he would sometimes get too deep in thought and wouldn’t register his surrounding but it was just you two. With the sun slowly going down, the snowflakes dancing around you both, and the Christmas light reflecting off his unique blue eyes. You took a slow blinked at him. Once. Twice. The same way you would when you were studying something, trying to unveil its secrets. Before sighing amusingly and opening up your arms to him. He was still the same.

“I’m here.”

The final assignment Albedo received was too hard, too complicated, far beyond his own limits and he was worried that if he never completed it, would he ever see his teacher again? When you took your first step outside the walls of the city, waving back to him as you set off on your journey, he couldn’t help but feel that like his teacher, you were leaving him too. But when you looked at him with those warm but understanding eyes, opened your arms to him, he let go and stepped into your embrace. He was sure he was borderline crushing your frame but you hugged him back just as tightly.

“My apologies. I got overwhelmed. Come with me, let’s get out of the cold first.”

You tried to hold it in but you laughed at his statement. He didn’t seem to mind as you felt him smile into your neck. Even with those words he hadn’t let go or slackened his grip in the slightest. So you both stayed there outside in the cold, the christmas lights reflected off snow, the sounds of laughter and singing playing in the background as you both embraced each other.

I’m home

You’re home

---

Although Albedo was happy to see you again, he was wondering why out of all the years you had been away, all the other holidays you had missed, you decided to come to Mondstadt today. You were at his lab and marveling at all his new devices when he popped the question. You flushed a bit but quickly brushed it off, saying that after all the letters he sent you were finally curious as to what Mondstadt was like and the people he met. Plus, Liyue and Inazuma didn’t celebrate Christmas as much as Mondstadt so it would be nice to finally celebrate the holiday again.

He simply smiled smugly and nodded along before you eventually caved, because that look could steal your heart away, and revealed that honestly, you just really missed him and wanted to spend Christmas together. There wasn’t anything wrong with that was there? So what if you missed him? It was natural. It wasn’t like you were wondering what he was doing on slow days in Liyue. It wasn’t like you we-

“You can stop laughing at me. I know you’re doing it even if I can’t hear it Albedo.”

“I’m sorry you must be mistaken. Perhaps your observational skills have rusted?”

You huffed at him before turning your attention to a small but worn sketching book. It was different from the ones he had showed you and much smaller compared to the ripped out sketches he sent you. Albedo noticed your curiosity and almost flushed before striding over and showing you what was inside. It was either he do it now or you would constantly eye ball it until he finally let you see what was inside.

He took out the old sketchbook and flipped all the way to the first page. They had been sketches of you. When it had just been you, Albedo, and your teacher he would often ask to draw you but he never showed you the finished product. What was surprising was they were all full sketches. No simple lines or unfinished colours. His interest in things, especially when he draws, were fleeting leading him to always create unfinished or basic lines.

“Wow, was this your first sketchbook? Did you draw anything else? Oh, like your assistant perhaps?”

“No. I only drew one thing here. It’s been sitting here ever since but I tend to make sure it’s in good condition. Should I ever need to draw in it again.”

Albedo almost reached for his pencil to sketch your smug but bright smile. But set his hand down. While he wants to capture moments so they remain forever with him, he felt that perhaps, it would be nice to live in them. Just for a moment.

---

I never write at the bottom of my fics but I wrote too much at the start haha (plus tagging my screaming doesn’t work anymore). Not gonna lie, this was going to be different and you and Albedo would have role reversed AND I WAS GOING TO WRITE MONA IN but that didn’t happen. I made it so disgustingly sappy at the end that I want to throw up but when do I not?

But I kind of like this version more. He’s super out of character but I don’t care and you’re gonna have to take this hcs out of my COLD DEAD HANDS. But I hope you enjoyed this and I’m using this as my Albedo catalyst so come home elevator boy. (cough celebration hcs are still open if you wanna feed me 👀 this )

#genshin impact #genshin #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact imagines #genshin imagines #genshin fanfic #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin headcanons #genshin impact headcanons #genshin albedo #genshin impact albedo #genshin impact albedo x reader #albedo x reader #albedo x lumine #albedo x aether #albedo #albedo headcanons #albedo imagines

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twinklelilstarkey · 3 years

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Bad Day - Nolan Patrick

Words: 2.2k+

Type: Fluff and slight Angst

Summary: You and Nolan are very different. Your bubbly personality is something that does contrast with his own. Yet he finds himself lost when that so happy person loses her spark after a hard and sad day.

Warnings: A lot of crying over college stuff (negative grades, overworking, etc.). Affectionate reader. Slight mentions of blood (from falling).

You and Nolan have been dating for almost 2 years, now. Some people do agree that your relationship was quite odd when it began, but those who are the closest noticed how much you two belonged together.

The surprise behind your relationship is mostly around the topic of how your personalities are nothing alike. You are this loud, bubbly, excited and happy human being, and you’re dating this silent, introverted, deep-voiced man. He, obviously, isn’t so silent when he’s with his friends or you only, but people still describe him as so.

Sure, you understand the shock but you two truly love each other. And that should be the only thing that matters, right?

You and Nolan aren’t exactly very active on social media. Yet you post more pictures of yourself than he does. And just by your feed, people seem to notice how different you two are.

Some people find it cute, while others not all that much. So you two try to limit as much posts with the two of you together as possible. And even though that comes with a lot of rumoring of you breaking up, you’re just, honestly, trying to minimalize the hateful words you usually receive.

But, yes, you two are very different.

You can notice that in how the two of you interact with each other. Nolan, being this more closed off person, doesn’t seek that much physical and affectional touch. Not as much as you, surely.

You hug him, cuddle him, snuggle onto him, kiss him, play with his hair, and so on. And you do that while battling his whines right in your ear of how he didn’t want to cuddle at that moment.

Bad thing for him, you look right through his shit. This man loves when you hug him, kiss him, play with his hair, etc.. He just doesn’t like to admit it.

Your affection doesn’t really leaves your apartment, since you two aren’t both two big fans of PDA. But, hand holding or hugging his arm close to you when it’s cold, is almost always happening when out of the house. Again, he doesn’t mind it at all.

And that’s literally how your relationship works - one whines and the other gives hugs.

Yesterday was a Sunday, and it went particularly well. It was Nolan’s day off, so he spent most of his day playing video games with his friends. You worked on an assignment while sitting next to him, and once when you were done, you sat in Nolan’s lap, ignored his protests - which lasted 10 seconds - and just fell asleep against his chest, completely exhausted with everything you’ve been doing for college.

You honestly thought this week wouldn’t be all that bad since it doesn’t all that much going on. Weekend was good, and that usually was enough to set the mood for the rest of the days.

But, you thought wrong. Very wrong.

You went to college around the same time Nolan went to practice, you had breakfast together and everything was good. But that was until your teachers started to announce that they already had the grades of some tests and assignments.

In two of your 3 classes, today, a teacher gave you a grade. Both of them negative grades.

The worst part? You thought these were the two evaluations that had gone well and seemed pretty easy when you did them.

If this is your results to the ‘easy’ ones, what about the ones that you, actually, struggled with?

After college, you walked back to your apartment, eyes already covered with tears over your failed evaluations, and right as you’re about to get home, you trip over your own feet.

Right when you looked down at Nolan’s text.

Even though nobody was in the street to see it, you felt more than humiliated. Your knee was now painted in dark red over the fresh wound, from your fall, and you were in pain.

This is just a whole recipe for disaster.

When you got home, Nolan was still not back. And that just helped you with wanting to break down more as you walked through lobby of your home.

It’s usual warmth welcomed you home but it did not provide any sort of comfort.

You went into your phone to try and distract your mind by scrolling through social media or looking at pictures with your friends and Nolan. But from not the lack of social media in these last few days, you let your eyes focus on old notifications popping up, comments, which are a few days old.

All of them negative.

From how you were using Nolan for his money or fame, to how unlucky he is to be dating someone like you. Insults were just scattered all throughout your feed.

As if your day could get any worse.

After half an hour of crying, you were able to force yourself into taking care of your nasty wound. Yes, there were some more tears and sobs here and there. But you feel more calm than before.

You ended up not texting Nolan since you were too preoccupied after your fall to remember anything. And he found it strange.

He had just texted you saying that practice was over when he got off the ice, and since then, he hasn’t received anything.

He kept on checking his phone. He checked it when he took his gear off, after he showered, when he got dressed, etc.. He kept on doing it, and still nothing.

And now, you are laying on your bed, in way more comfortable clothes, and under your comfortable and fluffy duvet and a blanket over your head. Your lap top is right next to your head and only your face isn’t shielded from any colder temperatures.

Tears would make their way back to you in between every few seconds while you force your mind to focus on a random video of reality show highlights. It’s like you can’t really control your body anymore.

Constantly reminding you of your failures as you keep on trying to focus on something else. But nothing. Nothing is working.

Over the loud background music and the dramatic screaming from your lap top, you don’t hear the front door of your apartment opening.

Nolan stands by the door, closing it behind him. He walks slowly to your living room, finding an empty couch. He checks the kitchen, still nothing. So he walks to your bedroom.

It’s awfully strange to not have you right around the corner to welcome him home. He had never noticed it before, but it had become apart of his routine already.

He opens the bedroom door slowly and his eyes finally find you. The slight creak of the door makes you look away from the screen and look up to find your boyfriend staring down at you.

To Nolan’s confusion, you didn’t do your usual ritual of when you spot him. You didn’t get up from your bed and gave him a kiss or a hug, you just continued to lay there.

Your eyes go back to the screen, fighting off your tears once more, and you hear Nolan start taking his shoes off.

He doesn’t say anything, filling the room in its natural silence, and walks to your side of the bed.

“Scoot over.” He whispers over the sound coming from your laptop.

You move your computer first, moving it to Nolan’s side of the bed, as you crawl to the middle. He slides under the duvet and blanket and you turn around, deciding to face him.

Nolan lays on his side, elbow on your pillow as he holds himself up and rests his face on his fist. His eyes are on you, studying your face, the way your eyes are slightly swollen and watery and how your lips seem to always curve in a small pout.

“What happened?” He whispers, not wanting to break the silence.

“Had a bad day.” You whisper back, blinking your tears away.

“Was it college?” He asks, you nod, “A test?”

You nod again and soon his face changes into a pitiful scowl. He feels bad for you, especially after yesterday, when you were so excited to finally have time for yourself. All of it ruined just because your grades are coming back to you as negatives.

“The other assignment I did, like, 2 weeks ago?” You ask him to see if he remembers, and he nods, “Failed that one too.”

Your voice is broken, your chin is starting to shake. You’re a blink away from breaking down again and Nolan feels so helpless. He wishes he could help you with college, but his knowledge in whatever degree you’re dating is close to nothing.

“-And I fell outside, too.” You break his train of thought.

A dry chuckle escapes your lips as you bring your hands up to wipe away your tears, as if you’re forcing yourself to laugh at your problems.

“On the way home?”

You nod and wipe your tears again, soaking the ends of your sleeves.

“My day has just been so awful.” Your voice breaks, making Nolan’s chest squeeze in pain at the sound of it alone.

Without knowing what to say, Nolan wraps one of his arms around you and pulls you in closer. The feeling that comes with not having you hug him back right away is strange. It almost makes him feel heartbroken.

As your face rests over Nolan’s shirt, it’s like your body just gives it all out. You start crying again, sobbing as you let all your worries out, mumbling some stuff you’re not even sure what they mean. And Nolan just holds you close, resting his head against yours while laying kisses over your cheek, neck or over your hair.

It’s so hard to see you like this. It has happened before, it has, but it’s never this bad. Which doesn’t make it that easy to deal with.

Your sobs stop after some time, your breathing slows down back to normal and your body stops to shake. Nolan still holds you, comfortably smoothing your back with one of his hands over your sweatshirt.

You, finally, wrap one of your arms around his torso and just rest your body against his a little, while in complete silence.

“When’s your next test?” Nolan asks against the skin of your temple.

“In 4 weeks.” You answer.

“Any assignments between today and that test?” He asks and you shake your head, “Okay, so you have more than enough time to get prepared and do amazing on that test.”

A sudden warm, giddy feeling runs through you at his words, yet you only nod at what he says.

“I wish I could help you study, but I’m clueless with half of the words in your notes.” He jokes and your lips curve into a grin, “I can always be your reminder to go back to studying?”

“You’re going on a roadie next week.”

He shrugs.

“I can still call.”

You smile and lean your face back onto his chest.

“What about that fall? Are you okay?” He asks, lifting his head again to take a look at your face.

“I’m okay, now, yeah. It was just really embarrassing,” You answer back.

There’s a quick silence and you lift your chin to stare up at Nolan.

“Did something else happen?” He asks, just to make sure.

You do a quick shrug.

“No- I mean,” You correct yourself, “I did check my Instagram after getting home...”

“And... what happened?”

“Just- The usual stupid comments.” You whisper at him.

He analyzes your face for a few seconds and brings his hand up, wiping with his thumb the rest of the tears under your eyes.

“I know I shouldn’t have looked at them,” You scold yourself, “But I didn’t exactly do it on purpose. They were just... there, when I wanted to look back at some pictures.”

Nolan nods understandingly and rests his hand against your cheek, cupping it as his thumb caresses your skin continuously.

“What type of pictures?”

“Like, with our friends or just the two of us,” You shrug, again, “I was just looking for something to cheer me up, you know?”

He nods at you and a small grin lifts over your lips.

He doesn’t scold you in any way. Doesn’t judge you for being stuck in the middle of the hateful comments that don’t do nothing but bring others down. He sometimes finds himself in those black holes without even realizing, and when they do bring him down, you’re there for him to remind him who he really is. Not letting the comments get to him. He can’t do anything else but the same. Return the favor.

“Do you feel better now?” He says at a low voice, almost in a whisper.

“A bit, yeah.” You nod, “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me.” He answers.

In the comfortable silence and under his smoothing and loving touch, you prop yourself up with one arm, so your face is in front of Nolan’s, and you peck his lips. It’s a quick kiss, but one that makes you grin back at him.

“I love you.” You tell him.

“I love you too.”

You kiss again but this time, he holds the back of your neck, pulling you in closer to him, making the kiss longer and letting it actually evolve into something more than a peck.

You kiss him back as his lips start to move against yours and your, only vacant, hand find its way to his side, almost as if pulling him in closer to you, even though you’re already glued together.

Nolan pulls back and looks back at you for a second.

“Want to go get lunch and then watch a movie?” He asks and your smile finds itself back on your face.

“I would love that.”

Is this good? I wrote it in between classes, while bored, so I hope it’s not too awful.

*First time writing for Nolan... I just had to do it, okay?*

#nolan patrick #nolan patrick imagine #nolan patrick imagines #nolan patrick x reader #nolan patrick x you #nolan patrick fanfic #nolan patrick fanfiction #nhl imagines #nolan patrick blurb #nolan patrick one shot

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anlian-aishang · 4 years

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Kinktober Day 3: Threesome - Erwin x Levi x Reader

“I see it like they come back from expedition and relieving stress in bed together. And if it's ok with you I would love to see some nsfw interaction between Erwin and Levi too because normally when I read posts with this setting they end up focusing in the reader, so it would be nice to see some action with one another too?”

Word count: 2300 Tags: smut, levi x reader x erwin, MMF threesome, consensual and playful jealousy, overall: especially spicy, fem!reader

Remember! Levi hates art theft.

It was not the most intuitive thing, but it made sense for the two of you. Adrenaline needed to be expended. Time needed to be made the most of. After expeditions - a day’s long surge of flight-or-fight, a brutal reminder of how fickle fate could be, you and Levi would chase a new and better thrill together. It was scheduled but surprising. It was a reward but a ritual.

Erwin and Levi had a routine, too. Theirs of a more formal, pen-to-paper nature: sitting down, going over the expedition. How many titan kills? How many casualties? What went well? What went poorly? The latter always took the most time.

Returning back today, you wasted your usual time outside his office, waiting for the meeting to be over so that you could begin yours. An hour passed, then two. You thought it over, today had been another disaster, but not one that should take three hours to discuss. You made for Levi’s office, just to see...

Levi opened the door quickly, seemingly a tad surprised to find you. You thought nothing of it. Your appointment had been delayed so long, you could not hold yourselves apart a second more. Before you knew it, he was jabbing down himself down your throat and your swallows kept him there.

The surging hormones, the rushing chemicals, they overtook you both. It was pure bliss, and thus, ignorance as well.

To your horror, you heard the unmistakable sound of the doorknob turning. You froze in the motion - his entire length in your mouth - but Levi did not. He kept up the pace in his thrusts, seeming to know just who was coming in and why.

“Levi.” That voice was unmistakable. Levi was your captain but Erwin was your commander. View still obstructed, behind the door, he asked, “Ready for debrief?” His swift entrance proved the question was no courtesy, merely habit.

With panic, you snapped your attention up to your lover. Levi was always in control. For such a disaster, you submit to him again: trusting his decision making, trusting he would handle the situation.

When Erwin rounded the door and saw your sex, you were eerily alarmed that his expression had not changed. After a long day, seeing so many things one should never have to see, this was - in comparison - not half-bad. In fact, not bad at all. A slight jump and shiver his only signs of startle.

Boldly, Levi maintained the steady rock of his hips into your mouth while likewise maintaining a solid eye contact with Erwin. “You’re gonna walk away, huh? Pretend like you never saw anything?”

Mouth full, you merely knit your brows. Where the hell had those smooth skills had gone?

But Erwin surprised you, too. Instead of darting out of the room, he grabbed hold on the top of the door and stared, “Problem with that?”

“Jerk yourself off. Hell if I care.” Levi flashed his eyes to you, pet your head, and brought his gaze back to Erwin. “Just saying: she’s really something. You should give her a try.”

You yelped around his cock in your mouth. It was no protest. In fact, this all came as a more than pleasant surprise. The times you fantasized about this threesome were uncountable, however, you thought of it as just that: a fantasy, one that your boyfriend would certainly veto, deny, scoff at. Now, though, Levi seemed the eager one. Your eyes widened, desire uncontainable, heat pooling, you mused against his member. What the fuck is even happening?

“I know -” Sensation from your soundwaves interrupted him with a moan he attempted to swallow down. His hand on your head forced your bobbing to slow, a desperate attempt to construct the sentence, “We know you want to.”

The thought crossed your mind: your mouth was still preoccupied, but maybe this was a good excuse for your silence. You decided against popping him out, communicating only with stares.

Erwin’s expression stayed solemn. His still seemed endless. On edge, you noticed immediately when he changed his stance. The commander made for the desk, straightened the reports and set them on the flattop. It looked so orderly, along with his steady undressing, along with his slow stride towards the bed.

As Erwin showed more and more, neither you nor Levi could deny his appeal. An even skin tone, the build of a Greek god, he was nothing less than a work of art. At the sight of him, you could not help but reach a hand to his abs, one hand to your pleasure. Likewise, when it came to your naked body, Erwin could not, would not, keep his hands to himself, especially given the overt approval of your partner.

Watching Erwin engage with you, undeniable lust clear in both his boss and his lover, Levi drew himself out from your mouth - taking his matters into his own hands. He reclined against his headboard and stroked himself up and down. Past the usual flat in his expression, you and Erwin both knew: he was relishing this encounter.

Forearm flexed as he continued to pump himself, Levi looked you both up and down, “Enjoy.”

// // //

A man of such stature stayed true to his size. His length felt so good, unbelievably good. You never knew a man could be so big. It went without saying, you had never felt a man so big. Mounted on top of him, his erection sprung perpendicular and straight up into you. Your walls stretched. You thought it a miracle that you could fit him, made possible only by your dripping arousal from prior foreplay with Levi. Your excitement encased him, allowing him to slide all the way in. Your eyes rolled towards the back of your head, Is this a dream?

It was as if he could read your mind. Erwin thrust his hips up off the bed, slamming his entire length into you, reaching your deepest depths with his enlarged tip. An unintentional glamour shot: you threw your head back, hair flopping across your face and over your back. With a clear airway throughout your whole upper body, out came a guttural utterance you never knew you were capable of - one you had never made before - one Levi had never coaxed out of you.

Your torso began to pulse, legs began to jolt, breaths turned to pants, all telltale signs that Levi knew all too well. For the first time, though, your sequence had an abrupt change. Instead of his name, you cried, “Erwin! Oh, Erwin…!”

Levi’s eyes narrowed. Watching Erwin’s huge cock penetrate your sweet cute pussy, his one and only, was riling in every way. Suddenly, pupils dilated with delight and shrunk with jealousy. Rapidly, he propelled his back off the headboard and hurried towards your bodies.

Reddened hands scooped under your shoulders, knuckles made sandwiches with your hardened nipples. You felt him start to lift, “N-No, Levi… please!” You begged, your riding grew frantic, racing towards a great release. “Please! Let him - Let me…!”

“Don’t worry, you little slut…” His tone was so loving, a stark contrast to such naughty words. Levi bit down on your neck - hard, marking you with his teeth. He pulled you up and off Erwin, up and off his impossible member, and tossed you back-first at the foot of the bed. “I have an even better idea.”

A shameless position: completely naked, you and Erwin lay on the bed, feet at the other’s head. You looked between your thighs: Levi sitting atop Erwin’s lap, his sprung erection leaking all over Erwin’s. You blinked twice and shook your head. The expedition, the night, had been filled with so many surprises, but this was without a doubt the most shocking sight of your life.

Levi reached a gentle hand beneath your chin and traced your jawline. “See how it feels...”

Slight malice in his voice was largely unsettling. You shivered in his hands, a crazy cross of anticipation and anxiety you had never felt before.

An insane snarl snapped across his face. “See how it feels…” Voice trailed. “... to watch your lover get fucked senseless by another man.”

Your jaw dropped as you watched Levi lower himself onto Erwin. With Erwin still coated in your arousal, he was able to enter, but not without heavy struggle on the receiving end.

Levi grit his teeth, trying his damndest to fit him in, all so that he could mirror that pleasure you had displayed. However, watching his cheeks flush, sweat form, muscles writhe, he had inadvertently given you that same feeling. That cocky attitude he had shown was melting away as Erwin melted into him.

A few more exhausted wiggles of his hips, Levi fit him in as best he could, which was only half of Erwin’s entire length. Despite only half, he reached his prostate easily.

A tinge of envy - that you could not provide him with such internal stimulation - stimulation that seemed heavenly - stimulation that he seemed to adore. That tinge was buried under the enchantment with the scene in front of you. Your dominant lover now being fucked by his superior, a much larger man, the size difference was just one of many enthralling aspects. Maybe Levi was trying to make you jealous, he was both succeeding and failing.

Hands sturdied themselves on Erwin’s thighs and knees. With this leverage, he carefully and deliberately began to ride him. Levi bent forward, bringing thirsty lips straight to yours of the lower half. Immediately, he tasted your difference, the blonde man’s precum still all over your sex. Tch… that’s mine.

Thus peaked his longing desire - his need - to hear you scream his name. Levi swiped his tongue all over each crevice of your cunt. With each taste of unfamiliar salt, it was only another push - another urge - that he had to get you there - that he had to be the one to do it.

Levi always gave his all for you, but this was something different. An entirely new force drove his efforts, exponentially compounding your pleasure. The merciless he displayed in circling your clit with a pointed tongue was a cruelty you craved. Changes from slow licks to fast thrusts were impossible to keep up with, impossible not to get lost in. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

You arched your back up off the bed. A tidal wave of pleasure was returning. After being denied before, it was not being held back again. Breath caught in your throat and you choked on his name, “L-Le…!”

Almost there. Levi leaned into you even further, adding his rigid fingers to the mix. Hearing you scream his name, at this point, it was more than a need. He would do whatever it took. As Levi moved forward, however, the angle allowed even less of Erwin’s length. He was not going to take such a drop in sensation lying down. Erwin snapped up into a kneeling position, forcing Levi’s head right on top of you, the rest of his body into the mattress in a humiliating, submissive position.

Instinctively, ass straight up in the air, Erwin’s hand plummeted onto Levi’s cheeks in a punishing spank. Erwin’s lip twitched as eyes stung with dominance, a commander through and through.

At the unexpected hit, Levi grunted into your pussy, “Gah! Erwin...! Fucking shit...”

After encountering both of you for so long, being teased and denied repeatedly, Erwin was more than overstimulated. He dug his hands into Levi’s sides and fucked with all he had, entire cock slammed all the way in, likewise overstimulating Levi’s spot. Levi turned his head to the side, catching his breath against your thigh, “Oh, fuck! Fuck…!” He cried, “Fuck me, Erwin!”

At last, without having to play it up, Levi achieved his goal. At last, you understood that feeling. Watching your lover get done by another, providing him pleasure in a way you never quite could, your heart raced in more ways than one. Sure, the scene was arousing, but it was also aggravating beyond belief.

You fisted your hand in Levi’s hair, pushing his face back down into your pussy, “Please, Levi!! Please…” Tired, steel grey eyes met your half-shut lids. “Please me like only you can!”

Between gasps, grunts, growls, Levi gave all he had into pleasing you. His tongue was dripping with exhaustion, with your fluids, giving perfect friction where and when it mattered most. When you came in his mouth, you lost count of the waves, of the times you called his name. Based on the relief in his face upon your release, you were assured: it was enough.

Erwin looked down, watching his entire length sheathe in and out of humanity’s strongest, all while he pleased his dirty cadet. The power he had over both of you, the control he held over everyone’s pleasure, the way he towered and commanded you both, that alone was thrilling enough. When he watched you cum in Levi’s mouth, felt Levi’s tightness throb around his cock, he at last lost control of himself: grunting loud enough to wake the entire barracks.

Finally, the combination of your release in front, Erwin’s release in back, the sex scene and threesome had drained everything Levi had: his tolerance, his composure, everything. After whimpers and screams, warm strands of cum, a seemingly endless climax. Levi collapsed on top of you. You stroked his hair, Erwin rubbed his back. For a moment, you met the gaze of your commander: realizing that even humanity’s strongest could be taken down.

Levi under one arm, you under the other. A symphony of post-coital pants, the shining sweat across your men, the warmth of Erwin’s bicep under your nape, the hot in Levi’s hand holding yours. Such flawless sex, maybe it was too good to be true, too good to be unplanned.

Kinktober Year 1 Masterlist

#levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #erwin x reader #erwin smith x reader #levi #erwin #kinktober year 1 #my writing #alias's #smut #specials #request #spice rack

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bronyinabottle · 3 years

Text

G5 MOVIE THOUGHTS FOLLOWUP - THE ANCIENT EQUESTRIAN ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM

SPOILER WARNING: THIS WILL GET INTO SPOILERS FOR THE G5 MOVIE EVEN BEFORE THE BREAK. IT HAS BEEN JUST OVER A WEEK SINCE THE MOVIE PREMIERED. BUT IF YOU STILL HAVEN'T SEEN IT, PLEASE SCROLL PAST THIS.

This is something of a follow-up to my thoughts on the movie. My thoughts on the movie were generally positive. Though much like the movie itself, the positive thoughts were on what it’s doing on it’s own merit as the start of a new generation of pony media. As someone who had followed Generation 4 from all the way in the middle of Season 1 to the ending of Season 9, the connection the G5 movie makes with the previous generation in the opening scenes are enough that it’s necessary to give a perspective from a G4 fan’s point of view. Again, I do want to say that G5 will be within it’s right to not have to answer so many plot things at once and try to stand on it’s own by exploring the characters and this new Equestria first.

That said, it shouldn’t be a surprise that the longer none of the questions G4 fans will have are answered. There is a huge elephant in the room with the unanswered questions from G4. And It is Hasbro’s fault in the first place for telling us it’s the same Equestria, There will be fans that are annoying about it from multiple angles, and there will probably be times where people who just want to enjoy G5 on it’s own just outright snap at anyone who wants their answers about what happened in between G4 and G5. Even if the person who asks the question is just genuinely curious and not being demanding there be answers. This is just the kind of thing that all fandoms that have timeskip sequels, especially ones where it overrides a happy ending where discussing with other friends can get dicey.

HAPPY ENDING OVERRIDES AND ALICORNS

Until we get an official answer from the show itself, we can only theorize with each other. Though theorizing about a happy ending override, regardless of how long it’s been and/or how sensible the theory is can start some heated discussions, Cause many were content with the happy ending of the original. While no realistic story ever has a happily ever after, a story within a fantasy land such as MLP’s can be an exception.

Let me give something of a comparison by bringing up another show. Avatar: The Last Airbender is perhaps my favorite show of all-time. And while it’s true I didn’t like the sequel series Korra as much as A:TLA. It wasn’t because of some happy ending override with at least half of the main cast from the previous series deceased. The Avatars themselves are just as human as the other characters in the world. Avatar’s still a fantasy world when all is said and done, but the way the world building is done still made it feel like it it was possible for the world to be in danger again by the time the next Avatar is grown up, most known Avatars had challenges they had to face. The Avatar series blends some form of realism but still manages to provide a fun fantasy world. It’s a case where it’s believable that the main legacy of Aang’s time as the Avatar aside from defeating the Fire Lord where he created Republic City would have it’s own fair share of problems that would be left to his successor to solve. Aang in turn was finishing the war that Roku failed to stop. So while I have my criticisms about Korra, none of those are related to the way the world is after the timeskip. It reasonably makes sense in the context of the Avatar universe.

In contrast, there isn’t much we know about the past of G4 and it’s a much more idealistic setting then in Avatar. Yes, ponies die with what I assume are human-esque lifespans for the exception of the Alicorns. But Friendship is Magic is a setting where the power of friendship is literal magic power that can save the day even when things look bleak. As a result it can get very sappy, but FiM is the kind of show you watch to put a smile on your face rather then go to for a multi-faceted plot. Most episodes of FiM are the kind of thing you see in a lot of other shows. But what brings most of it’s fans back even for the most overdone plots is the characters and their interactions. FiM’s lore is a lot less straight forward, and sometimes may feel not as consistent given there were so many different writers over the long span of time. That said, there is something about the series that sort of ties in heading into G5 and that’s G4’s history, and especially Alicorn lore. We don’t get a lot of either even back in G4, as the most we get is the founding of Equestria was through the Hearth’s Warming Eve story, and the knowledge that Alicorns like Celestia and Luna are at least older then 1000. Which is a huge gap compared to the Avatars that no matter how powerful, have similar mortality to our own. Throughout G4’s time, the debate about Alicorns have raged throughout the whole time even before things got really heated upon Twilight becoming an Alicorn in Magical Mystery Cure. Some went with Celestia and Luna being the only immortal Alicorns while Cadence and Twilight were somehow lesser Alicorns that aren’t immortal but maybe at least still a longer lifespan then their normal pony friends and family. Though as of Season 9, that may be turned on it’s head when in The Last Problem. Twilight eventually grows to Celestia-size as Celestia and Luna even retire to let Twilight succeed them. If Twilight is somehow a lesser Alicorn, why did she grow to Celestia’s size? Why did Celestia and Luna retire in the first place if they knew Twilight will not be as long lived as they are? Perhaps part of the reason G5 has as many questions as it does is because G4 itself created questions it never promised to answer.

That said, the implied length of Celestia and Luna’s rule still presents G5 with a problem that will be asked everywhere. Even if we go with the possibility that most of the Mane 6 have passed from old age, you still have to answer something about Twilight. If Twilight is also dead, how long did she live? Did she at least have an over-1000 year reign as Celestia did? Was perhaps Luster Dawn chosen to be her younger co-ruler if Luster herself ascended at some point? The kind of things that might actually force G5 into a corner when it comes to Alicorns despite the fact G4 never had to, especially now that Sunny may have just become one herself. This is once again, another of the traps Hasbro put the writing team through by having them put it in the same world. G5 thus not only adds questions about what happened in between the Generations, but also now has to inherit what remained unanswered in G4. That is a VERY tall task on a team that will likely just want to do their own little fun pony show. It’ll raise expectations too high, and there will be annoyed fans regardless how they spin it. Which could have all been avoided if they set it up that this was an entirely new world, or made G4 a fictional story (With all the references to it being mainly merchandise for a really meta look at things) in the G5 universe. You’d still have people complaining about it not being as good as G4 probably, but the approach they went with added more gasoline to the fire whenever G4 Vs. G5 debates happen in the MLP fandom. And inter-fandom generation fights are never fun, just ask the Pokemon and the Sonic fandoms how that turns out (Even though there’s no Generation number count for the Sonic franchise. You could say Gen 1 of Sonic was the classic era. Gen 2 was the Sonic Adventure Era. Gen 3 was the “Dark Age” Sonic 2006-Sonic Unleashed era. Gen 4 the Sonic Colors and Generations era. and Gen 5 the current Sonic Forces and Team Sonic Racing era. And then of course there’s also the different TV shows and comic books that also have their own fans that can be at each other’s throats).

There isn’t going to be an easy solution to something that will no doubt have fans on the edge on their seat even if they will be left to hang on that edge for a longtime before G5 starts to give some answers. I think I’ll at least bring up 3 things that will probably be part of the discussions of just what happened between G4 and G5

(More after the break)

1. AND THEN EVERYTHING CHANGED WHEN THE FIRE NATION AN UNKNOWN THREAT ATTACKED

With G4 being considered Ancient Equestria. It’s probably safe to assume this is at least 1,000 years after G4. And 1,000 or more is a really, really, long time. Where anything could of happened, including *GASP* a villain actually winning at some point (Or at least, did some lasting damage even if they were ultimately defeated). Though I think even with that possibility, there has to be a sense that the villain didn’t defeat the Mane 6 while the other members aside from Twilight were still alive. If Twilight was at some point defeated. Perhaps the villain struck when Twilight was most vulnerable. You could also have it that Twilight somehow sacrificed herself to defeat a large threat. She saved Equestria one last time, but at the cost of even her long-lasting alicorn life. With the populace left on their own to continue life without Twilight, but the loss of their longtime leader too much for Equestria. Thus a slow decline happened.

As for who the threat was it’ll probably be a while if we ever know. Perhaps the real Grogar showed up at some point and was truly a harrowing threat to deal with. Or something entirely new. Maybe it wasn’t even a villain, but a catastrophic natural disaster. Whatever it is, if this is the case. We’d have to deal with the sad thought of something being too much for even Twilight to handle

2. TWILIGHT BECAME DEPRESSED/JADED AFTER HER FRIENDS PASSED. POSSIBLY EVIL TOO?

This would basically be the cliche sadfic ending. Where after everyone of the Mane 6 has passed. Twilight just never felt the same afterward. Though I do feel like there is the slight counterpoint that maybe Twilight would still have Celestia and/or Luna (maybe, again we’ve never ever gotten full confirmation of how long Alicorns live. Just assured that it’s more then 1000 years) and she’d most certainly still have a full grown Spike and any of her friends descendants. Death is always a sad reality, but you have to wonder if Twilight would have prepared herself by the time that comes. Twilight would have not gone as far as she did without the rest of the Mane 6. But while I’m sure it would be a tearjerking moment, it’s not like Twilight wouldn’t have other friends she made throughout the generations. Celestia and Luna also must of gone through the same thing living for more then 1000 years, yet they seem pretty fine. So while the subject of “immortality blues” is prime for sadfic material in the fandom. It feels like there’d have to be more nuance then that, if this were the reason the time between G4 and G5 led into each other.

Supposedly, this theory is picking up some form of steam. To the point that a head canon is rolling around is that it was actually Twilight who sealed the magic away in the first place for one reason or another. Essentially making Twilight, in a huge plot twist, a villain in G5 or at the very least someone who took the magic with them into some form of Limbo very similar to Starswirl and the other founders during the Season 7 finale. I… personally don’t know how I’d feel about that. They’d have to be very careful with the execution of such a twist. And I’d want more nuance then simply Twilight getting sad about the deaths of her friends. At the very least, it’d likely eventually get to a point where this villainous incarnation of Twilight is reformed and probably becomes a recurring character from then on. But the writers will have to tread very carefully if this is the direction they take.

3. G5 IS AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT UNIVERSE/TIMELINE. JUST FOR THE MOST PART THE MAJOR EVENTS OF "ANCIENT EQUESTRIA" STILL HAPPENED

Perhaps this last one really gets into a more desperate side to deflect any possibility that the ending of G4 could of deteriorated into what the world becomes at the start of G5. I know there will be plenty that will be too frustrated with the lack of satisfactory answers that they annoy people in the comment sections, getting into situations where sometimes the only answer to those people will be others that just want to watch G5 as a fun show with a “cope”, “read a history book”, or “deal with it”. But honestly, there can be a case here. As I mentioned in my thoughts in the movie. There are visual details on characters and/or lore that while they may seem minor, to the point that even if they do ever answer important questions such as what caused magic to disappear and/or what happened to Alicorns like Twilight. That the staff may ignore completely because they think it’s too small of a detail to bother including. But the most nitpicky fan can and will latch on small excuses into why it can’t be the same.

Let’s begin with the one-sided Cutie Mark. Again, while it’s true that previous generations made this a tradition. And it was only on one side on the G4 toys as well, as the actual reason it was on both sides in the G4 show was because it was easier for the flash animators. That said, it’s still a big pony design inconsistency. Because regardless of it was only to make things easier, it became a staple because of how long G4 lasted. So it was still so weird to see early screenshot and artwork of G5 characters with grown ponies with no mark. When that wasn’t possible in G4, as it turned out it was because the one-sided cutie mark returned. But one side as opposed to both sides is still a significant difference. Similarly, the horns and wingtips being a different color then the coat may also be a significant difference. Of course I know it can be just waved off as art style difference, as the art direction is no longer based on what Faust wanted the ponies to look like. It’s still plausible enough for someone to discredit it as truly in continuity with G4. Cause even for those that are on the side of “More then 1000 years is a long time, anything could of happened” it’s a lot harder to argue against inconsistencies such as cutie marks only being on one side unless they switch gears to the meta explanation of “G4’s double sided cutie mark was not intentional, at least at first”. But from what most people saw in the G4 show, G4 ponies had marks on both sides. And the G5 ponies don’t. It’s again, quite nitpicky. But it’s enough to start a case that at the very least, the ancient past of G4 is not 100% the same G4 we saw in the show.

Speaking of not the same G4 we saw in the show, another possibility is that G5 actually came out of an alternate timeline. Where perhaps the last two seasons did not happen. If perhaps it’s a timeline where major events in the show either ended anywhere between the end of Season 4 or the end of Season 7, then it starts to feel a little more possible. (Supposedly, the tree of harmony in it’s Season 9 form that might counteract it. But then again it had none of the treehouse architecture and was all wood. Which ironically may lead into it leaning more that the G4 show isn’t the same continuity). If the events of the Friendship School nor everything else that leads to the ending we saw in The Last Problem. It’d be a lot more palatable because the pretty much implied world peace ending with non-ponies in the mix included is discounted. There’d still be questions even in this scenario, like did Celestia and Luna still retire in this timeline then. And regardless if they did or not, the show would still be burdened with the question of what happened to the Alicorns. But it’d at least solve the most pressing question with the peace of The Last Problem being squandered. Because perhaps in this timeline, the Mane 6 never went that far. Perhaps it would imply some sort of indirect failure in that case. But this is perhaps a scenario they had a similar foreign policy as Celestia did. Not really hostile to anyone, but not intervening even in ways that could be helpful. Heck, if we go far enough in saying that G5\s G4 (As confusing as that may sound) was different from what we saw in Friendship is Magic, what if there were differences even early on for one reason or another? With how vague the connection is, we only know that the Mane 6 were friends and Twilight still became a princess at some point. From there. potentially a lot of other things may have gone differently other then that.

Again, saying G5 is a completely different universe/timeline is probably always going to sound like a desperate way for people who cannot possibly believe the ending of G4 eventually led to the start of G5. And I’d understand why that’ll annoy people who just want to watch the G5 series on it’s own merits. But it really wouldn’t be entirely the fans to blame for that attitude. G4 lasted a whole decade, many got attached to the characters/world we saw that had about the happiest ending it could possibly be. It should naturally make people unhappy that in a few ways it’s stomping over a happy ending for this fantasy world that many watched to escape from the realities of the real world.

Even with the long time allotted of 1000+ years or more, that’s made complicated by the implied long lives of the Alicorns from G4. Only opening up that can of worms further by seemingly making Sunny an alicorn. There’s a debate on whether this form is permanent, but if it’s NOT permanent. That arguably adds yet another addition to the list of reasons it may fall out of continuity. The only time we had a temporary Alicorn transformation (outside of Animation errors, or dream sequences like Big Mac’s) was when Cozy was an Alicorn after receiving some of the magic from Grogar’s bell. But even in that case, Cozy’s wings were not more like a glowy hologram like Sunny’s wings seem to be. And even if it is permanently on Sunny now, the design for Alicorns is too different. Adding onto the one-sided cutie marks, and different colored wings and horns. So the G5 writers may actually be stuck in a lose/lose situation when it comes to Alicorns after the ending of the movie. I think whether Sunny is permanently an Alicorn or not, they may not elaborate enough about it. And it’ll be among the headaches in the comment section (Though may at least be a reprieve from the political discussions G5 are going to have on occasion I imagine.)

Hasbro chose to try to say this is the same Equestria, and a new show needs conflicts to solve. But from the perspective of some G4 fans… it forces a world they loved, to get torn down into arguably a more divided world then even the Hearth’s Warming tale. Which said tale seems to have been implied to be from before Princess Celestia and Luna were around (Based on the lore of the unicorns being the one to raise the sun and moon) and thus yes. Somehow, if everything that happened in G4 is canon to G5. Then the world peace in The Last Problem in just a thousand years or so become worse then even Celestia’s sole rule.

RESPONDING TO “READ A HISTORY BOOK”

I’ve mentioned before, you can try to point to World History to point why this is a realistic take. But again, we don’t have an ancient civilization from 1000 years ago that we look up to as the pinnacle of peace in the world (Like I said, the Golden age of Ancient Greece and/or Rome still had slavery and brutal wars). That has literally never happened. What was shown in the Last Problem very much looked like it was that for Equestria. I feel it’s a terrible interpretation of time, especially in regards to the context that the leaders of Equestria tend to live for at least more then 1000 years to imply things would just go backward like that.

CONCLUSION

The movie on it’s own merits is a good start for the generation, though at the same time. It’s going to have some hard questions that’ll often be no-win situations for the writers. They can choose to ignore the G4 questions, understandably trying to tiptoe around as many cans of worms as possible which would allow them to do whatever the heck they want with G5. Maybe even getting a few stragglers frustrated with no answers to just shrug and continue watching anyway if the show entertains them enough. Or they can certainly try to at least give some answers on the biggest questions (What happened to the magic, and/or what was the fate of G4’s alicorns) but risk having an answer that just adds even more questions.

The movie is a decent start for a new generation if you only view it as a pilot for a new series, but if you view it as a sequel to Friendship is Magic. There are certainly problematic issues with that currently. Maybe the special in Spring, or the eventual Series will cover some of this but it does leave fans waiting a while for answers that they’re not promised to get, or at least not as quickly as they’d like. Remember when I mentioned that I may view some of this similarly to how I was about Starlight Glimmer after her sudden redemption at the end of Season 5? With many questions I wanted to know about Starlight before I could really accept her as a recurring character? (And not really fully coming into terms with her until I expanded on her myself in a story for I Dream of Twilight Sparkle) This may be how I have to view the connection of G4 and G5.

They can go one of two routes: At least try to give as much of a clear explanation as possible. Even if it’s one that doesn’t exactly answer everything, at least giving a good try may help with those who have questions remaining in relation to G4. If instead however, they go the Season 6 Starlight route of just about ignoring all the questions fans have, it’ll make things frustrating for many. At least with Starlight, she wasn’t the major focus in every episode. That said, Season 6’s job was to endear us more to her reformed character. Now with G5’s setup, it may be running well into a corner where they must try to answer what happened in between G4 and G5 or else you end up making a lot of fans lukewarm or worse to your series. Starlight’s reformation and then lack of ability of Season 6 to explain more about Starlight to us was a divisive moment. And G5 involving G4 brings over the same kind of feeling but on a larger scale because now it’s in the very premise of the generation’s plot, it’s less avoidable compared to one character. Because even when it comes to episodes that will not further the plot and it’s just a fun friendly moment between the members of the mane 5, this movie is how they met and thus the not fully explained premise would always be looming over like a large shadow. It probably doesn’t help that they’re basically starting with a reformed Starlight-esque moment when it comes to introducing it’s premise AND on top of that something similar although certainly with at least a lot less backlash then with Alicorn Twilight since it came so soon. Though I do have to think there will be people who think this was way too soon to be ascending Sunny, since at least we got to see Twilight’s journey to Alicornhood (Even if you weren’t a fan of the episode she ascended in). Sunny arguably does earn her Alicornhood through implied years of working to unite the ponies. But it can still feel too soon when you had 2 1/2 seasons worth of episodes before Twilight did, while Sunny did so within one movie.

Someone’s ultimate thoughts on G5 might end up being what they are looking for in this new generation. If they’re looking for just about everything new. The movie provides plenty of that with new characters, new locations, and a more modernized world compared to G4 Equestria (Even if G4 Equestria had it’s own fair share of electronics it looked like, such as video game machines). If you’re in this for the G4 references. Aside from the very beginning of the movie, you’re kind of stuck doing a where’s waldo for most of the movie. And no guarantees you’ll get much more then that later. As I said in the trailer thoughts, the G4 stuff could very much be just Hasbro trying to bake it’s cake and eat it too. With a world that feels like it should be it’s own thing, but they didn’t want to commit entirely to that. So they shoehorn G4 in as the ancient past without giving a proper explanation to how point A (the end of G4) got to point B (the start of G5). It’s only been about a week since the movie premiered, but there is just so much to digest. And for those looking for answers to the G4 elephant in the room, may feel like they get nothing but metaphorical tummy aches for a long time.

I’ll end this off by having a message to both people who already feel like they’ll be fans of G5, as well as people like me who were fans of G4 and have concerns about where G5 may be doing to it’s legacy.

For the G5 fans, as I mentioned in the trailer thoughts. I still hope that it turns out ultimately good. I don’t know where things will go from here but the G5 movie taking in context that it’s basically a really long series premiere, had some genuinely enjoyable moments. At the same time, I hope anyone in the G5 fanbase can try to understand why G4 fans have the concerns that they do. I’ll repeat, G4 lasted a decade and was the absolute peak of MLP’s popularity. There will be a lot of people attached to that world, and understandably upset about the implication that it got torn down into how the world is at the start of G5. If they’re really annoying about it, I can understand why you couldn’t hold the urge to snap at them to “Get over it” just try not to snap at the ones who are just asking curiously. I’m personally not going to spam comment threads with “THIS DOESN’T FIT WITH G4!” or “HASBRO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS PLEASE”, but I would be lying if I were to say I’m not just as curious about what those type of fans want to know too.

And as for G4 fans like me, if G5 ever upsets you in some fashion. It’s ok to stop watching and just stay quiet whenever you find yourself in a conversation about G5 and only participate in G4 matters in the fandom. This is a natural evolution of a fandom’s lifecycle where eventually a direction a franchise is taken to a place some others don’t like. So you’re only left to mainly talk with those who prefer an older generation and/or incarnation. Just because G5 has started and even though Hasbro says it’s the same world as G4. You can still do G4 content by itself and ignore G5. If you still have the inclination to do stuff with G4, do it. Generation 5 is not stopping people from still drawing the G4 characters, or writing more stories about them, or even if you don’t feel you’re that creative. Support artists who are still drawing G4 ponies, and/or rewatch some of your favorite episodes of Friendship is Magic that give you a smile. MLP has lasted since the 80s, and while for the most part to Hasbro it’s to sell toys. Toys, and the shows surrounding them’s purpose is to make the people watching or playing with them smile. From the little girls in the 80s to the much more diverse both gender-wise and age-wise fandom that came out of G4. The cute ponies are supposed to make us happy, and it’s ok to get back into a comfort zone if perhaps a different part of Ponies don’t give you the same feeling or even upset you in some way. Also as a vice versa to my message to G5 fans, try as best you can not to provoke those enjoying G5. If the G5 movie and/or episodes makes them as happy as your favorite G4 episodes/movies you should let them be. Many of us had to deal with that crap just for daring liking a pony show at all early on in the fandom. Try not to add to the toxicity as best you can. G4 is not going to be forgotten, the fact Hasbro decided to try to make it in the same universe actually has the side effect of making sure of that. Cause maybe you have fans that enter the MLP franchise through G5 curious about what happened in the past. And thus, they can be led to watch the previous generation. New G5 fans could potentially also become new G4 fans and friends. In other words, friendship… is still magic!

#mlp #my little pony #g5 #mlp g5 #netflix #my little pony the next generation #my little pony movie #generation 5 #g4 #mlp g4 #generation 4

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yuzusorbet · 4 years

Photo

Kikuchi-san’s book, partial translations

Akira Kikuchi is the trainer who accompanied Yuzu to many competitions in the past. Since elementary school days, Yuzu has gone to his clinic in Sendai for therapy sessions after skate practice. Last year (2019), Kikuchi-san published a book titled 'Strongly, beautifully, 30 Methods to train' (my translation from the Japanese title). I read a Chinese translation of some parts. Very interesting to see things from his perspective, and quite touching too, so I decided to translate them to share. Not ideal to translate from another translation but I don't have the book, and usually Chinese fans' translations are pretty reliable.

*paraphrased means I summarised a few lines there. *more info means I added notes for myself, and it's not from the book.

Chapter 1, part 5. The muscles that were forged after the earthquake.

He became the World Junior champion, and also started school at Tohoku High School, and at the age of 15, Yuzuru made his debut in senior level competition. His 1st competition was Season 2010-11 NHK Trophy in Oct where he landed his 1st quad jump in competition and was in 4th place. 2010 Nov was Cup of Russia in Moscow, where he placed 7th. (more info: Japan nationals in Dec, he placed 4th. Then 4CC in Feb 2011, he placed 2nd.)

At the end of his first senior season, the Great East Japan Earthquake happened. (March 2011)

When the earthquake occurred, I was working, seeing 4 patients. My home and clinic felt the shaking but were not damaged due to being on higher ground. But very quickly, the electricity, water and gas were cut off.

[paraphrased: Everyone was worried but preferred to stay on.] I continued treating the 4 patients. When they left, I closed the clinic temporarily.

Soon, people whose homes were washed away in the tsunami or destroyed by the quake took refuge in nearby sports halls. When I heard about this, I brought a simple bed into the sports halls and did massages for the people there. That was how I spent each day.

The reason I did this was because I thought of my father that night after the earthquake. He was a policeman and was very strict with himself. He was upright and always thinking of the safety of others. He lived his life for others and he is the man that I most respect. If father was here, he would definitely go to the evacuation centres to do his best to help......

Giving a massage to people at the centre, I was just doing the only thing I could do.

Yuzuru also went through some hard days.

On the day of the earthquake, he went to his usual training rink 'Ice Rink Sendai' after school. It was at the rink that he experienced the "shindo 6" earthquake. (More info: shindo 7 is the highest. See this: robintlewis/what-is-the-japanese-seismic-intensity-shindo-scale. On the Richter scale, this is a magnitude 9 earthquake.)

That child felt the strong shaking and I heard that he rushed out of the building wearing his skate boots. Next to life itself, the most precious thing is his skates. Figure skaters always put skate guards on the blades when they leave the ice, they would never let the blades be exposed. Rushing out without his skate guards, he must have been very scared.

Staying 4 days in the gym of a school which served as an evacuation centre, he seriously thought about whether he should give up figure skating.

It was also figure skating that made him pull himself together.

His home rink was damaged in the quake and he lost his usual training place. His coach during elementary school days, Tsuzuki Shoichiro, inquired about him. Tsuzuki-sensei is the one who gave Yuzuru his foundation in figure skating. Before the quake, he was coaching at a rink in Yokohama.

Subsequently, Yuzuru went to Tsuzuki-sensei's rink to train.

About half a year after the quake, around October, Yuzuru who had returned to Sendai came to my clinic. He told me about what he had been doing.

During that period, he was participating in commercial ice shows and earthquake charity ice shows all over Japan; I knew about this. "For the people affected by the disaster, I want to give them some encouragement," I had read his interviews in the newspapers. In the 5 months after the earthquake, he skated in 60 ice shows throughout the country. "I hope that my activities can become strength for the victims"-- to have this thought, he must have pulled himself together.

"When I participated in ice shows, I could do some training if I arrived early at the venue, and the intervals between shows also became my own training time," said Yuzuru, looking straight into my eyes. (more info: usually there are a few shows at one venue, eg. 3 shows spread over the weekend)

After such an unprecedented earthquake disaster, what had Yuzuru learned, mentally how had he changed, all these I was not sure. But the moment I touched his leg muscles, I immediately felt his efforts and I almost cried.

Since elementary school, I had been seeing him almost everyday. Even a small change in his body I would know.

The muscles forged after the earthquake told of days filled with harsh figure skate training, day after day.

Skating in ice shows "for the disaster areas", and practising fervently in between shows. During the performances, he must have also put in all his efforts so as to "convey something to the people".

Moreover, the muscles developed after the quake were not only those used for jumping, they were also those for bearing the impact of landing.

Landing on the ice after a jump, the impact on the body can be a few hundred times the skater's weight. To withstand such an impact, the muscles around the knees, the gastrocnemius muscles in the calf and the tibialis anterior muscles must be sufficiently trained. If these parts are not strengthened, injury will happen easily.

In a short period of half a year, those muscles grew to such an extent. How much jump practice did he do after the earthquake. Falling down countless times and getting up again. How on earth did he train to develop muscles like that.

Yuzuru's leg muscles are different from other athletes that come to my clinic. His muscles were not developed by specialised muscle training but were formed naturally though figure skating practice. In other words, they are muscles that grew only for figure skating.

Until now, that child still mentions that he "does not know how to ride a bicycle". In my opinion, I think it is because he does not want to develop muscles except those needed for figure skating.

The muscles used for cycling are the same as those for speed skating. Speed skaters have cycling in summer training; bulging leg muscles are necessary for them.For figure skaters, if muscles become big and bulging, the weight can be a hindrance to jumping. But still, strong muscles are needed to do quad jumps and to bear the impact of landing. [paraphrased]

Yuzuru overcame the earthquake disaster and developed muscles for jumping quads and for bearing the landing impact in a good balance.

Those well-trained leg muscles are the external manifestation of his experience of the Great East Japan Earthquake and his determination to fight as a top skater.

- translated by me from this Chinese translation: weibo

-----------------------

Chapter 1, part 6. Overcoming pain in the hip joint

The first time I went along with Yuzuru in the team for a competition was in his 2nd year of senior level, the November 2011 Rostelecom Cup (Russia) in the Grand Prix series. Traveling with a team to an international competition as a trainer, it was the first time for me. Not only that, it was also my first time watching a figure skating competition up close. What a disgraceful old man. Almost everyday I listened to Yuzuru talk about all things related to figure skating but I had never watched his competitions live at the venue.

I saw Yuzuru only at my clinic, diagnosing leg problems, applying tape to stabilise ankles, this kind of interactions, the relationship of a therapist and a patient, I felt this was enough.

I had the role of a 'sports trainer' before, but not for professional athletes. Supporting local high school and junior high students, I was already very content. I had served as 'team trainer' for the swimming, baseball, and track and field teams of Tohoku High and Junior High Schools where sports is very popular, and went with the athletes for competitions.

Once these children graduated, the relationship between trainer and athlete would end. Those who wanted to continue their sports career, some would leave Sendai, some would get a professional trainer to guide them.

"Rostelecom Cup is going to start, Sensei, can you go together with me as my trainer?" Yuzuru asked me. I answered in a relaxed manner, "Oh, alright."

As an athlete, Yuzuru was steadily rising.

"Whether it's an international competition or the Olympics, let me be your trainer and take me along!" This was what I said to him jokingly when he was in elementary school grade 4; I don't know if he still remembers it. But this kind of joke has really come true now, so I was actually feeling rather emotional.

This was also like a commendation from Yuzuru for the treatment he had received so far. "Well, it's just doing the physiotherapy in Russia instead of the usual place in my clinic," this was how I thought at that time.

However, at that Rostelecom Cup, at the official practice, Yuzuru injured his hip joint (the joint between hip bone and thigh bone).

The injury was treated by a trainer sent specially by Japan Skate Federation. I was just Yuzuru's private trainer.

I understood the situation fully when we were back in his hotel room. The treatment for the injury had ended but the pain was still there. I was very sure that it was not suitable for him to do more skating. Even walking would be painful.

"In this situation, it's better to withdraw (from competition), isn't it?" When he heard this, he said with absolute certainty, "Whatever happens, I will compete in Rostelecom Cup." Actually for this competition, Yuzuru must win first place in order to qualify for the Grand Prix Final which is for only the top 6 skaters of the GP series. He wanted to compete, no matter what.

From that moment, I felt for the first time that I have "joined forces with an extraordinary world". Yuzuru was so focused on the competition, "want to compete", "want to win", these desires were way above any pain. As a therapist, of course my advice was to withdraw. But as a trainer, I had to respond to such intense wishes of the athlete.

All I could do was to take care of his hip joint. I also taped his ankle, and then sent him off to compete. I knew the pain of the injury was still there.

But, Yuzuru, he did it....... short programme and free skating both were ranked 2nd, but his total score of 241.66 was higher than other strong rivals like Javier Fernandez and Jeremy Abbott, and he achieved his first victory in the GP series.

At that moment, witnessing it with my own eyes, I was crying. Even though he received treatment, his hip joint injury was quite serious. Any jump would be very painful, especially when landing, he would feel severe pain. In spite of this, for the free skate, he made a mistake only for the quad jump, the other 7 jumps were all successful.

For the first time, I realised it was such a cruel world that Yuzuru was fighting in.

In the spectator stands were many Japanese ladies and they were looking at me with a surprised expression "why is this old grandpa crying so much??" But it did not matter anymore, I did not care how others were looking at me, I was crying my heart out. I was so happy..... really so happy.

That Rostelecom Cup was my first experience as a trainer stepping into the figure skating world.

After this, I did not accompany Yuzuru to any more competitions. I stayed in my clinic treating patients, and sometimes I would treat Yuzuru who came back from travels.

After Rostelecom Cup, Yuzuru rose rapidly at an astonishing speed.

For the GP Final, he was 4th, then at 2011-12 World Championships, it was his first time at Worlds and he achieved 3rd place. At the age of 17 years and 3 months, he broke the record for the youngest World Championship medalist in Japanese figure skating men's history and ascended to the podium.

Then, from April 2012, Yuzuru moved his training base from Sendai to Toronto, Canada.

Before he had overseas competitions, I saw him almost everyday at my clinic. We had been together for the past 10 years. So I would miss him quite a lot.

But it's for becoming stronger that he went to Canada. For greater improvement in figure skating, he made the decision to move to Toronto. He has already "graduated" from my place here.

"Sensei, I'm going off!"

And just like each overseas trip, Yuzuru set off from Sendai, and started on another journey.

- translated by me from this Chinese translation: weibo

This is the book on Amazon Japan: https://www.amazon.co.jp/

(I will share parts from Chapter 2 soon.)

#translation of Kikuchi-san's book #Akira Kikuchi #Yuzuru Hanyu

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kanri-tea · 3 years

Text

De-aged Jakurai

Jakurai gets de-aged via illegal mic.

You were born and raised in the darkness of the underworld. Death nipped at your heels even from an early age and you learned quickly to never be surprised.

Unfortunately, there are some things you cannot predict, and this is one of them. In front of you are two men, a blonde, sparkly looking man, and a red-haired, tired man.

“Sensei?!”

“Aaaaghh! How could this even happen?!”

You tilt your head. They aren’t familiar and they certainly don’t look like your handlers, but looks can be deceiving, so you stay silent, unsure.

“Is- is that a knife?!”

They’ve caught sight of your blades and they start screeching and yelling even more. It makes your head hurt. You want to leave, but you don’t know if they’re your handlers, but also, you thought you were on a break.

Turning heel, you walk away from them. They’re probably not your problem, and frankly, while you don’t know how you got there, you should most definitely be returning to base.

“Oh my god,” Hifumi hears Doppo mutter again. Which is kind of mean, it’s not like they purposely lost Sensei. They had looked away for, like, a second and poof! He was gone! How rude!

“Oh my god.”

“Doppo~! C’mon, enough sulking! We have to find Sensei before something bad happens!”

“Hi-fu-mi. We lost Sensei. We lost a child version of Sensei!”

Hifumi shrugged. Well, yes, they did, but no use crying over spilled milk, right?

“I doubt Sensei has gone too far, he’s tiny right now,” he chirps, glancing around the horizon for any hints of where Sensei could have gone.

“Aaaaggh. Why did we have to run into one of your stupid self-proclaimed rivals! Of course, they had to have an illegal mic!”

Okay, now Doppo was really being unfair, Hifumi thought, pouting, it wasn’t like he was actively making enemies. It wasn’t his fault his kittens loved him so much more than those brutes.

“C’mon, Doppochi, let’s go find Sensei! I think I saw him go this way!”

Hifumi started dragging Doppo along the path, ignoring the spluttering and heavy feeling in his stomach. The child version of Sensei was like 10, plus it’s Sensei. He wouldn’t stir up toomuch trouble… right?

“Uhhh…”

This was not what Ichiro had expected to see today. What was supposed to happen was him going to work and then going home to take care of his cute little brothers, a very typical and normal day.

Ichiro most definitely did not expect to see what seemed to be the child of his former teammate.

“Hey,” Ichiro started, rubbing the back of head. This was super awkward.

The kid stared back at him with wide, flat blue eyes.

“Uh, are your parents around?”

“I do not understand.”

Okay, this was new.

“Y’know,” Ichiro said, kneeling down, “Your dad or your mom. Shouldn’t you be with them? Not… not here in a dingy alleyway.”

The kid blinks, “I do not know where my progenitors are. I do not have memories of them.”

Okay, now the kid was just being difficult. What the heck did that even mean?

“Okay… What’s your name, kiddo? I’m Ichiro.”

“I am called Jakurai,” the kid replies and while its not exactly an uncommon name, what are the chances of a little kid that looks almost exactly like Sensei and having the same name?

Right on cue, his phone buzzes. It buzzes multiple times, actually, but more importantly, keeping his grip on the may-or-may-not-be-a-de-aged-Jinguji-Jakurai, there’s a message from Izanami.

Opening the message, Ichiro fights back a groan. Of course Matenro had to run into an illegal microphone, and of course Sensei had to be de-aged.

“Well, Se- I mean, Jakurai, I guess we’re stuck with each other for now,” Ichiro felt a migraine building.

The child version of Sensei stares back at him. Well, at least he’s not screaming or anything, plus he’s kind of a cute kid, Ichiro thinks, and begins leading the kid back to Yorozuya Yamada.

You don’t know why you let this boy drag you around. He’s so painfully civilian, it almost physically hurts you. Almost.

He takes you to his home and treats you like a child. You don’t understand. You are not a child; you are a weapon.

He even gives you a popsicle. You don’t really know how to react to this, so you take it. It’s sweet.

Ichiro seems to be calling people. An informant, you think, and the familiar label lets you relax a little bit.

You glance around the house. It looks more like an office than a house, but you since there are two floors, you assume the residents live on the second floor. Either way, even the office looks lived in. There are pictures of two other children with similar facial features to Ichiro, whom you assume are his siblings, and there are random items strewn about.

It feels warm. Like love, you think, but you don’t know what love is.

You glance back at Ichiro. He’s not facing you, and your blades feel heavy. You think about how easy it would be to kill him, how vulnerable he is. You don’t want to though, but if your handler tells you to, you know you must.

You know you wouldn’t want to kill Ichiro though.

You know you don’t want to kill at all.

It takes them nearly two hours to finally reach the Yamada residence in Ikebukuro.

Two hours way too long, Doppo hysterically thinks. Hifumi, as much as Doppo loved him, was a disaster and a half, from being distracted by the smallest of things and then being too terrified to move because of a couple of women, the trip had been a long one.

Greeting them at the door is the second member of the Buster Bros, Jiro, and the flat look that he gives them really does not help his nerves.

Did something happen?

“C’mon, your creepy kid leader is in the office,” Doppo hears Jiro mutter, and he pushes down on the instinctive feeling to apologize. This isn’t the time to fall victim to your shitty self-esteem, he thinks to himself.

“So,” Ichiro tells them, “It’s only supposed to last, like, a day or something. He’ll return back to normal on his own.”

It’s relieving to hear that, Doppo thinks, and beside him, he can tell that Hifumi thinks the same even without having to glance over.

In another room, along with Yamada Saburo, sensei is listening to the other boy ramble with blank eyes. There’s no movement or twitching coming from the child, nothing like how his brother was like when they were younger and had to sit still for any period of time.

Doppo would’ve attributed it as sensei’s nature, but there’s something unnatural about the stillness, something off about the younger Jinguji Jakurai’s perfect posture.

He can’t put his finger on it, but it unnerves him and from the looks of it, everyone else, even the youngest Yamada, has picked up on that. They don’t question it though.

It doesn’t take long afterwards to collect sensei and to return to their apartment. The child doesn’t question it, just follows them blankly and quietly.

It really is unnerving.

The siblings interact with you, but you quickly realize that you scare them. That you unnerve them.

Maybe it’s because they’ve realized that you aren’t human, something whispers in his mind, but he brushes it off. They are civilian and pose no danger to him.

The sparkly man and the tired man show up again. You’re not sure why.

Where they your handlers?

The youngest child, Saburo, tries to distract you while Ichiro talks to the sparkly man and the tired man. It doesn’t work, and you eavesdrop on their discussion.

De-aging. You don’t know what that means, and it makes you feel uneasy. A test, maybe? To prove his worth to his possible handlers?

You don’t know, and the uneasiness grows as you follow them to their safehouse. It warm and cozy and well-lived in, unlike most safehouses you’ve stayed at. It feels very off-protocol, but what do you know, you are a weapon.

They feed you and it isn’t poisoned for once.

They lead you to a room and they tell you to sleep.

You don’t understand.

Maybe, you think, things will make sense when you wake up. When you wake, there will be assignments to do, targets to kill. You are a weapon after all, not a child, not a human.

You fall asleep warm and comfortable for the first time that you could ever remember.

“Sensei!”

“Good morning.”

There is sunlight shining on his face in a way that doesn’t in his own home, and instinctively, Jakurai wakes up tense. It only takes a couple more seconds, however, to realize that not only is he not in his own apartment, but that he was also in Doppo and Hifumi’s apartment.

Why?

The last thing he could remember was a rap battle, and an… illegal… microphone.

Oh. Something had hit him, but Jakurai couldn’t figure out what.

It doesn’t take long before Hifumi starts spilling about the previous day, Doppo interjecting at times, about his child self, about the illegal microphone, and about the Yamadas.

You thank them for looking out for you and make a mental note to thank Ichiro as well. You dodge the questioning stares that appear when they start talking about your child self’s demeanor.

By the time you leave, unpleasant memories are drudged up and regret spills into your thoughts.

You aren’t a weapon anymore.

You don’t have to kill anymore.

You won’t kill anymore.

Your purpose now is to serve humanity, to save people. To be a better person.

What once was will never be again, not if Jakurai had any say or control over it. Jinguji Jakurai is the saintly doctor of Shinjuku. It will be the one thing no one can ever take from him, not Amemura, not the Chuuoku, not Hitoya.

But you know you will never be any less deadly.

You have sworn to never dirty your hands with lives again.

#hypnosis mic #jinguji jakurai #buster bros #matenrou #de-aged jakurai #child jakurai

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agentrouka-blog · 4 years

Note

Dany is not graceful as queen in books. Remember when she openly mocked quentyn in books n laughing. Her own council was surprised that why she is even laughing. She even shows immaturity in meereen court by throwing fruit on xaro. Sometimes I think her stans stans reject this as moment of immaturity. They claim meereen arc was mistake n she will learn her lesson or it's not her fault that she tried but people don't listen. I'm waiting for her to go north n show her immaturity.lol

It sort of shows that all this is intensely personal for her. She doesn’t put on a “Lord’s face” the way Ned sometimes does, there is no “lady’s armor”. She will put on a prop (”floppy ears”) or a costume (the tokar) and she can most certainly hide her true intentions if she so chooses (Astapor) but her personal feelings in a situation are always paramount and often on display. She is not Daenerys doing the job of a queen. She is Queen Daenerys, 100% of the time. Her interactions tend to be informal, whenever she can get away with it, and her emotions rather than an understanding of her duty guide her. Because nothing stops her from doing that, no checks and balances, all power is concentrated in her hands, all decisions flow from her. She is not a servant to a system, she IS the system. It’s very absolutist, very god empress. L’État c’est moi.

There was something in his face that reminded Arya of her own father, even though they looked nothing alike. He has a lord's face, that's all, she told herself. She remembered hearing her lady mother tell Father to put on his lord's face and go deal with some matter. Father had laughed at that. She could not imagine Lord Tywin ever laughing at anything. (ACOK, Arya VII)

Ned makes a clear distinction between his role as a ruler and his private life. His private life, that is Cat. That is his children, his closest counsellors, his brother Benjen. Robert, to a degree, before Ned realizes he’s become a stranger.

Jon tries to do the same thing, but to a horribly exaggerated degree. Where Dany is Girl and queen, inseperably, Jon turns to ice. (At the behest of a Targaryen, no less.)

Jon’s POV:

Kill the boy, Jon thought. The boy in you, and the one in him. Kill the both of them, you bloody bastard. "You have no father. Only brothers. Only us. Your life belongs to the Night's Watch, so go and stuff your smallclothes into a sack, along with anything else you care to take to Oldtown. (ADWD, Jon II)

Translates in Sam’s POV to:

Jon, he'd said, but Jon was gone. It was Lord Snow who faced him now, grey eyes as hard as ice. "You have no father," said Lord Snow. "Only brothers. Only us. Your life belongs to the Night's Watch, so go and stuff your smallclothes into a sack, along with anything else you care to take to Oldtown.” (AFFC, Samwell I)

It fits well with Dany’s POV:

"Rakharo is blood of my blood. His life belongs to me, not you," Dany told the two of them. Rakharo had grown almost half a foot during his time away from Meereen and returned with arms and legs thick with muscle and four bells in his hair. He towered over Aggo and Jhogo now, as her handmaids had both noticed. (ADWD, Daenerys VI)

Dany tells them. The girl Dany, who is the queen. Over something so trifling as their crush on a growing young man.

Dany is mostly emotion, little duty, no real plan. She just overthrew a system, everything is new. Jon is all plan, all duty, no emotion. His problem is the same as Dany’s: He has no private life to balance him. No spouse, no siblings, no friends, no family. These “brothers” are no true brothers. And Dany’s “blood of my blood” is just another form of servant.

How are these babies supposed to lead with no outlet for their inner lives? It can only end in one extreme or the other.

Jon does it all for duty but he seems just as arbitrary to some of his brothers as Dany allows herself to be.

But there is no good solution for either of them. The structure of the NW condemns Jon to loneliness, and he himself sends his allies away. He is alone and friendless when he can no longer sustain the all-duty facade because actual family suddenly appears within reach and requires his help.

Dany has no family to tempt her. Not a human one. Her family are her “children”. Her options to ameliorate this are blocked by her infertility, and her natural personal desires.

Marriage as a queen comes with political concerns first and foremost, which sucks, and she really struggles with that. Her disappointment with Quentyn is not political, it’s about sexual attraction. Her objection to marriage to Xaro, to Hizdaar, they always tie to love and desire. And to the trauma of childbearing and infertility. The satisfaction of a political deal successfully concluded cannot outweigh her resentment over having to subjugate her physical autonomy, sacrifice her personal desire. And that is normal for a 15-year-old girl. Heck, that is normal, in general.

Combining political power with personhood, rather than an established office, and leaving no recourse by political control or by private relief… recipe for disaster. Especially for these extremely young people.

They are in positions within systems that require them to NOT be 15 or 16 year old human beings with emotions and needs. But they cannot stop being that. And so they fail, themselves and others.

Dany chooses her dragons. Jon chooses the Starks. Both choices are inevitable. But Jon has the privilege that the Starks are his pack, his human family, his actual and true emotional balance. Within that embrace, he can rule, and rule well.

Dany’s dragons are destructive WMD’s and they give her only ever more power but no emotional balance. She will keep being god empress, and she will keep failing.

#asoiaf #daenerys targaryen #jon snow #asks #my posts

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aros001 · 3 years

Text

First time read through light novel vol. 4. Random thoughts.

So this is where mayonnaise came into the story. I still remember my sheer utter confusion over the mayo bath in the Memory Snow OVA, having no memory of the anime ever bringing up any of Subaru's love for the condiment. As a positive for him at least, it's cool that Emilia apparently really likes it too and that he's the one who figured out how to makes the stuff in this new world.

“The lad’s eyes interested me ever so slightly. They said he has crossed the boundary of death. Many come close to the line, stop, and draw back, but...” Wilhelm lowered his lids in thought as his words trailed off. “Those are the eyes of one who has crossed once, no...several times, and returned. I know of no such being. You might say I was compelled by curiosity.”

How would he know what the eyes of someone like that look like if he's never met anyone like that before Subaru?

“Listen and be amazed, look and be astounded! Behold, the ultimate combat technique—RoSciPer!!”

“What is that...thing?! You did not inform me such a hand was possible!”

“Shut up! I didn’t mention it, but it’s your fault you didn’t ask! That part is rock, this here’s scissors, and over there is paper! In other words, my hand’s beaten your rock!”

That is so freaking petty. But on the other hand, maybe Priscilla would respect him for it anyway? I could see her having no problem with winning however you can, even if it's by being unfair and tricking your opponent, as long as you keep your own pride.

“—But I wonder what Master Roswaal is thinking?”

She inclined her head slightly as she voiced her doubts about the instructions her master had left that morning.

“He said, ‘Do not stand in Subaru’s way no matter what Lady Emilia may say to you.’”

It was as if he’d anticipated Subaru’s actions and had instructed her accordingly. She also wondered why he was valuing Subaru’s opinion above Emilia’s.

Hmm...now that's curious.

“That’s right, bro. It’s been eighteen years since I got summoned here. I lost my arm around the same time... Right around the age you are right now.”

Just like that, Al confessed to Subaru that he’d experienced the same situation.

...Wait...WHAT?! If this was in the anime then I completely forgot about it because holy sh*t, Al is from another world too?! And according to him he arrived 18 years ago and was about the same age as Subaru is (and Subaru is roughly 17, isn't he?). No idea if he can Return By Death and if he can he might have the same penalty for trying to talk about it as Subaru does, so he obviously couldn't talk about it, but this is a huge deal. It's a great bit to add to Subaru's story, showing off what could have happened to him and what he could still eventually become. It probably deepened his obsession with Emilia a little bit too, since she's the main difference between him and Al.

“Unfortunately, Lady Emilia, this is not the time or place for you to argue. If all the facts become clear, Subaru will be staying here...for a very, veeery long time.”

Okay, Roswaal f**king knows and is planning something.

They talk about a Dragon Tablet handed down by Holy Dragon Volcanica, which has given predictions and warnings about great disasters that did actually occur. Naturally, my first thoughts are that this Holy Dragon (or whoever wrote the tablet) might have had abilities like Subaru's RBD and that he'll have his own role to play.

Felt might be a long lost princess of the royal family that was wiped out in a strangely specific plague and Subaru met both her and Emilia first in this world because she stole for her the thing that proved she was a worthy candidate for being a Dragon Maiden. It kind of feels like the Witch of Envy is like the Force from Star Wars with how well she made the destinies and chance encounters line up.

I never really liked Ferris that much, and not because he's a cat-boy trap. It's more the way he talks. I like things that are cute but I can't stand things that are cutesy.

While Crusch's idea for the future of the kingdom is nothing that should be rushed, and most certainly should be done with care as not to piss off the dragon, I get where she's coming from, that they are too reliant on the dragon's blessings and not doing enough for themselves. It's a classic argument I've seen plenty in superhero stories. There's no denying the heroes have done a lot of good but when the people become too dependent on them and if/when the heroes can't help anymore, what's going to happen then? It's one of my favorite plot points in My Hero Academia, where common citizens thinking "It's fine, a hero will show up and take care of it." and not helping where they should have eventually gave rise to one of their world's most dangerous and infamous supervillains.

“A-and now you make threats. These words and this show of force convey, ‘Do as I say or you shall be an icicle.’ If this is not blackmail, what is...?!”

Then, Emilia wholeheartedly affirmed his suspicions.

“—Yes, I am threatening you.” She continued, “I shall make my case to the esteemed members of the Council of Elders once more. My name is Emilia. I spent a long time in the Great Forest of Elioor, the World of Eternal Frost, and am served by Puck, the Great Spirit that governs fire mana. I am a silver-haired half-elf. The people of the nearby villages called me...”

Emilia paused, surveying the faces of the Council of Elders on the dais.

“...the Freezing Witch, born in the Frozen Forest.”

Holy sh*t, I am way more into Emilia's character here than I was in the anime! That was awesome! Her whole speech after too and her finally being given some respect. It's not like she didn't have any personality or agency in the anime. It's not like she could have just been replaced by a sexy lamp and nothing would be different like you could with the heroines of other series. But she definitely feels like she has more here, like there's more fire to her. Like hot damn, even I want to see her become queen now!

...And then Subaru opens his mouth again...and promptly inserts his foot.

Yeah, I suppose Subaru white knighting for Emilia in front of all the actual white knights is probably one of the more infamous scenes of the series, huh? It's one of those weird things where you feel you know what Subaru should have done but at the same time, if he hadn't snuck into the castle, we wouldn't have gained his relationships with Priscilla and Al or have seen as much of the meeting as we did. It's good for the story and eventually it's good for character development but it's hard not to wince a little at everything Subaru does in this part, especially because he himself reflects and feels guilty at a few points about how badly he could have messed everything up for Emilia and Roswaal.

I've thought a lot more about Subaru's white knighting ever since I watched the anime, mostly because of characters like Motoyasu from Rising of the Shield Hero and Mitsurugi from Konosuba; two LN series I read before this one. Chivalry isn't a bad thing. Trying to stand up and fight for someone you care about isn't a bad thing. But like Emilia points out, she never asked Subaru to do any of that for her. She didn't want him to do any of that for her. In fact, he deliberately went against what she did ask of him to go and do all of that. With these three characters, the problem with their white knighting is that they're doing it with no regard to what the person they're white knighting for actually wants. In many cases, like Emilia also points out, Subaru wasn't really doing it for her. He was doing it for himself. To make himself feel better. To place himself closer to her. And she's not exactly wrong that their relationship seems to be entirely just two people repaying their debts to each other, even though she has no idea what debt Subaru feels he owes her.

The ironic thing is, if Subaru wanted to get closer to Emilia and have value to her, he already found a way to do that in one of his previous lives. On his second or third loop in the mansion arc, Puck told him that Emilia doesn't have a lot of experience with friends and really wants some. During that loop, Subaru and Emilia are just hanging out, enjoying each other's company, laughing. It's made clear she does genuinely like having him around. Just being her friend was enough for her and there's still plenty of ways her friend could have helped her through such a trying time, without embarrassing her in front of everyone in the castle or making her think it's her fault he keeps getting hurt.

I think Subaru's big problem, and what he needs to grow out of, isn't that he's an idiot (though he can certainly do dumb things) but rather that he's immature. Not immature like he's a child (though sometimes...) but immature in that he hasn't developed enough to properly react to certain situations. He was a shut-in who constantly skipped school. He doesn't have a lot of experience with other real people and doesn't know how to properly interact with them, defaulting too often to what he's seen in fantasy stories. I think that's a problem both he and Rem share to an extent. They don't know what it means to be in love. That's not to say that Subaru's love for Emilia isn't real or that Rem's love for Subaru isn't real. Rather that they don't know what to do with it. They don't know how they should act towards the person they're in love with or how to show their love, so too often they default to either obsession or devotion or both. And so if they want to have a healthy, happy relationship with the person they love, they have to acknowledge and address their own immaturity and basically grow up a bit.

Nice little detail that Julius beat on Subaru to keep any other knights from going after and possibly killing him...and because he was at least a little annoyed by Subaru's words. He's a good guy...but still human.

And again with Roswaal working things behind the scenes. He gave orders for Subaru (or at least a servant bearing his family crest like Subaru would be) to be allowed to pass into the castle. I imagine he did have a back-up plan for if Subaru never showed up but the man definitely knows or suspects something about Subaru and/or what's going on with him. I mean, benefit of the doubt, if he doesn't know about RBD, from the outside it does look like Subaru has some kind of prophetic abilities, as twice now he's known about future events that would have destroyed everything Roswaal's been working towards and used that knowledge to prevent them. Making things easier for Subaru to act just in case he had another "vision" would have been in Roswaal's best interest. He might be thinking Subaru is like the Holy Dragon, thus Roswaal has his own personal Dragon Tablet. But I can't help but feel things go deeper than that. At the very least I'm glad Subaru's outburst and Roswaal trying to smite him with fire was apparently part of the plan. 1, Roswaal is just a really fun character and I don't want to lose that, but 2, he definitely seems like a guy you don't want to have against you.

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/Re_Zero/comments/gontd5/novels_first_time_read_through_light_novel_vol_4/

#re:zero #random thoughts #reddit repost

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amuelia · 4 years

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do you think the red wedding outcome would happen in a universe where domeric bolton lived & fought in the WOTFK? would he have remained loyal to the starks, or have been included in roose's plans?

This is an interesting ask, but unfortunately also one with a lot of unknown variables... I will divide this long reply into chapters:

Characterization of Domeric

We only know little about Domeric’s personality. We know that he was a “quiet boy”, very talented with a diverse array of hobbies. We also know that he was friends with Lord Redfort’s sons, implying that his quiet personality doesn’t translate to him being a loner and that he has a social streak to him - he also later wants a brother by his side, so it seems he was lonely in the Dreadfort and craved company.

In the Vale, Domeric had enjoyed the company of Redfort's sons. He wanted a brother by his side, so he rode up the Weeping Water to seek my bastard out.

We know nothing about Domeric’s feelings about the Starks. He was born and raised a Bolton, who historically do not have the best relationship with the Starks; despite Boltons bending the knee to House Stark, we do not have a recorded marriage between the two houses. However, Domeric spent 4 years as Lady Dustin’s page and 3 years at the Redfort, opening up the possibility that his values might not have been entirely influenced by Roose (similar to how Ned got an education in honorable values through Jon Arryn). Barbrey is known to despise the Starks, but was also Brandon’s lover and is shown in aDwD to still have fondness for him, so it is unsure which values she might have imparted on Domeric.

Domeric is said to have been a good jouster, and enjoyed the company of his friends. He might have liked being part of Robb’s honor guard, which has at least several characters that seem to be around his age (i got the impression it’s all young people, like a squad for Robb).

While we never hear about Domeric being cruel or unlikable, we also have to take into account that most of his descriptions come from his own father talking about him, who has reason to concentrate on the positive aspects. Barbrey seems to have loved him, but she is also his aunt, and since her positon as Lady of Barrowton forces her into being an eternal widow, she might have seen Domeric as a son of sorts, so she would have been biased. We also know he was good friends with the Redforts, so he probably does have charme to his personality and does not present himself in an unlikable way. However I do not think this necessarily has to translate into him being a good person or a “cinnamon roll”; there’s plenty of characters in the books that are well liked and charming but still commit war crimes and other cruelties.

Relationship to Roose

Roose never makes a direct statement about his relationship to Domeric. We know he took care to give him a good education (music, histories, and fighting are mentioned), and he sent him to House Dustin and House Redfort to be fostered which is a great opportunity for a young Lordling to forge connections.

I believe Roose expresses fondness for Domeric in the way he talks about him; He mentions him and then launches into a long reminiscence without much of a reason (thought granted that is pretty much the theme of that chapter), he proudly mentions all his talents and how gifted he was, and seems to talk with a certain sadness/bitterness:

Now his bones lie beneath the Dreadfort with the bones of his brothers, who died still in the cradle, and I am left with Ramsay.

Horses … the boy was mad for horses, Lady Dustin will tell you. Not even Lord Rickard's daughter could outrace him, and that one was half a horse herself.

Unfortunately that doesn’t necessarily need to translate back into Domeric being fond of his father - We can compare this to Roose’ relationship to Barbrey, where he seems to put trust and effort into her (”How many of our grudging friends do you imagine we'd retain if the truth were known? Only Lady Barbrey“ | “[Roose] takes care to keep me sweet”), while she on the other hand talks in a very disillusioned way about him (”Roose has no feelings, you see.”). We do know Roose appears to be the only Bolton (besides Ramsay), so the lonely Domeric might feel attachment to him in that aspect. Roose is generally liked by few characters, and often appears cold and unfeeling. He is deeply flawed, has a mean aspect to his character (like his mean sense of humour), is mocked for his strange health habits, and seems to talk a lot and think hes very smart and witty. On the other hand he is also somewhat tolerant/laissez-faire (”Your amusements are your own, I will not chide you on that count”), he seems to have provided Domeric with everything he could want and supported all his hobbies, and judging by how Walda seems to like and trust him (”Lady Walda gave a shriek and clutched at her lord husband's arm.”), and he also doesn’t agree with Ramsay’s treatment of Jeyne ("Roose is not pleased. Tell your bastard that."), we can assume that Roose does not treat his family members in a cruel way. It is also worth mentioning that his cold and unfeeling attitude seems to be at least partially motivated by him trying to hide his intentions in fear of them being used against him (in line with his other cautious behaviour), so it might very well be that he is warmer towards people he trusts (Note that we only ever observe him from the PoV of people he is not close to). So while there is a lot to dislike and be annoyed by about Roose, he also has qualities that Domeric might have liked.

It is interesting to analyze the scenes with Roose and Ramsay for how he might have interacted with Domeric. We know Roose loves to educate Ramsay on how to be a good Lord and impart his wisdom to him, and that he also frequently enrages Ramsay with the tone he uses. The quote “I forbade it, but Domeric was a man grown and thought that he knew better than his father.” suggests to me that he might have butted heads with Domeric in a similar way, giving him advice that Domeric doesn’t always listen to. Since Domeric openly disobeyed Roose, it appears he was not scared of his father, and that he had a proud/stubborn aspect to him.

It is of course also important to note the differences: Ramsay is of a lowerclass background (Roose has been shown to be classist - “His blood is tainted, that cannot be denied.”); He has a cruel und unwise personality that might frustrate Roose and make him resort to using a meaner tone with Ramsay; and we know Roose on occasion talks negatively about Ramsay when he is not there (”Ramsay's nature was sly, greedy, and cruel. I count myself well rid of him.“), though he has also talked positively about him in related scenes (”Yet he is a good fighter, as cunning as he is fearless.”). While he talks in a condescending tone to Ramsay and even insults him, he might have had more of a respectful tone to his competent, trueborn son.

Domeric and the Red Wedding

I think in any case, Roose would have tried to take care to keep Domeric out of any great danger. Domeric would have surely argued with him on many points (”Domeric was a man grown and thought that he knew better than his father“), and since he seems to have had martial prowess he would have probably insisted on participating in battle. If Roose had tried to participate in the Red Wedding without Domeric’s knowledge, Domeric would have probably been a nuisance; he appears to be highly intelligent, he has no fear of speaking out against his father if he doesn’t agree with an idea, and he doesnt seem to blindly comply with his fathers wishes if he doesn’t see a reason to. Roose would likely not have let him near a situation as dangerous as the Red Wedding especially if Domeric doesn’t know about the plan, but it might have been hard to get him out of the way without a good reason.

If Domeric knew about the Red Wedding, he would be a good asset, since he’d likely have a position close to Robb (as i mentioned the guard seems like something he’d participate in). However even in this case I think Roose would have tried to keep him out of the Wedding itself, as not to put his sole heir in danger.

However, another problem is that not only does Roose never state his precise list of reasons for the red wedding (making it a point of debate to discern what exactly changes if you change the course of events), according to grrm he also wasn’t even completely set in his tracks to go through with the Red Wedding until pretty much the last minute:

As for Bolton, if you reread all his sections carefully, I think you will see a picture of a man keeping all his options open as long as he could... sniffing the wind, covering his tracks, ready to jump either way... even as late as his supper with Jaime at Harrenhal... - SSM 8/3/2000

Domeric’s presence could influence so many plot points it is hard to say if Roose would have even come to the point of getting the Red Wedding in motion.

Would Domeric even go to war with Roose or would he stay behind as Castellan of the Dreadfort like Ramsay did? Is Ramsay even still there/does he still have a position of power or role in the story? If Ramsay isn’t there do Bran and Rickon even flee and get presumed dead? If Bran and Rickon are still alive does Cat still free Jaime and commit an unpopular political decision? Does Winterfell still burn? It doesn’t seem likely that Roose instructed Ramsay in the minutiae of what happens in Winterfell considering Ramsay is presumed dead before he even enters it; So would Domeric in charge of the Dreadfort have instead opted to liberate Winterfell if someone reached out to him? Note that the disaster at Winterfell seems to be one of the main reasons that Roose considered the Red Wedding:

"I [serve] the King in the North. Or the King Who Lost the North, as some now call him.“ - aSoS, dinner with Jaime

"What … what do you owe me, m'lord?" - "The north. The Starks were done and doomed the night that you took Winterfell." He waved a pale hand, dismissive. "All this is only squabbling over spoils." - aDwD, dialogue with Theon

Also with a trueborn and gifted adult heir, would Roose even have considered marrying a Frey maiden? Would Domeric have wed one instead, or would Roose prefer a better alliance for him? Would Roose marrying a Frey count that much for an alliance if the Frey child wouldn’t even inherit the Dreadfort?

Conclusion

As you see there are many questions and What-Ifs, and probably even more that i didn’t mention considering how much of a butterfly effect all of asoiaf is. So i don’t think there is any “canon answer” to what would have happened; it all hinges on how you interpret Domeric’s personality, his relationship to his father, what changes to the plot his presence might have brought, and how you think Roose might have reacted to them.

#asks #domeric bolton #roose bolton #asoiaf #asoiaf meta #not art #thrillainvanilla

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wickedmilo · 3 years

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SURVIVAL TIPS | MILO & WILLOW

PLACE: A bookstore TIMING: Way, way back when Milo first became a vampire SUMMARY: Milo and Willow accidentally cross paths, and realise they both have the power to distract each other from their problems WRITING PARTNER: @willcwthewisp CONTENT WARNINGS: None

Milo couldn’t remember the last time he had unironically set foot in a bookstore. After graduating uni, it all felt a little pointless. He had books, though they were at his parents’ house, far beyond his reach now. And reading felt too trivial considering the latest developments in his life. Why would he ever need books? What could they possibly have to offer him? But this evening, against his better judgement, he had been struck by the overwhelming urge to go to a bookshop. To steal back a semblance of the normalcy belonging to his previous life. With Harsh’s constant, and unexpected support, he was feeling more in control than ever before. Though his grip on his cravings remained tenuous at best, he figured he was capable of a short visit. After impatiently waiting for the sun to set, he had hurried into town, slipping quietly through the familiar door. The bell above him rang out, announcing his arrival, and the sound caused a wave of nostalgia to wash over him. Maybe he missed this more than he thought. Once upon a time, before he had allowed himself to spiral, he would come here. His mom would find new books for him to study. His dad would nudge him away from the children’s section, towards the classics that were technically beyond his reading level. If it’s easy, then what are you learning, Milo? You need to be challenged. He could still hear his tone, the exact way he would make not being able to choose his own stories sound like a privilege rather than a frustration.

Drifting through the various sections, taking in the new sounds, and scents he had never been able to appreciate before, it wasn’t long until he found himself standing where his parents used to encourage him to stand. They would search through the shelves, talking amongst themselves to determine which novels were best suited for their son. Even now that he had a choice, he was drawn to the books they had selected for him. Maybe it was a warped sense of loyalty, maybe he missed the simplicity of having every decision made for him. Gently running his fingers along the spine of Great Expectations, he wondered whether Charles Dickens had lived in a world of vampires, and ghosts. Certainly Edgar Allan Poe had to have known about the existence of the Supernatural. It made him want to revisit the tales, search for any hint that might indicate the world had always been this confusing. Finally pulling Great Expectations from the shelf, he turned to walk towards the seating area, completely unaware of the person walking in the opposite direction. He stumbled backwards the moment he saw them, very nearly walking into them. A sheepish grin on his face, he did what he could to hold his breath. Harsh had already warned him doing so would draw attention, but he didn’t see any other option when people got so close. “Shit- I’m sorry. I didn’t see you.”

Willow was to the point of desperation when it came to finding the book she was looking for. For some unfathomable reason it wasn’t available anywhere that she could find online. Maybe it was simply so popular that most sellers had run out of it, but either way she’d ended up braving the trek to the bookstore after hearing they had a copy in stock. Books were one of the few ways she’d managed to stay sane in her self-appointed isolation, filling her head with stories of the outside world that she couldn’t bring herself to experience anymore. But she should have known going out into public once again was a terrible idea, and that became clear the moment she nearly collided with another being. Her eyes widened in alarm at the severity of the close call, already imagining how she could have sent the young man standing in front of her flying through multiple shelves of books.

“Oh god-” Willow gasped as if she’d been startled at a haunted house, hand clutched to her chest as she took a few, healthy steps backwards to put some space between her and the stranger. “No, no- I didn't see you there either, I’m sorry.” Her nerves had been set on edge by the near run in, and she was doing her best to steady her breaths, trying not to think about the ten million ways this interaction could go poorly if the stranger got too close. “I was just- I wasn’t watching that carefully where I was going, I guess.” A lapse on judgement on her part. She should know better than to walk blindly when she was a walking disaster waiting to happen.

Milo was already tense, doing his very best to hide it. But it made him feel a little better to hear the stranger’s heart pounding in her chest. Clearly he wasn’t the only person who had been caught so off guard, and clearly he wasn’t the only person so panicked by the close proximity. The relief didn’t last for very long though. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, the sound of her pulse served as an unwelcome reminder of how dry his throat felt, the new reality he was desperately trying to ignore. Before he could take a further step back, the woman had done so for him, and he watched her curiously, wondering whether she might also a reason of her own to keep her distance. “Are you okay?” He asked, genuinely concerned for her. “No- I wasn’t looking either, it was my fault as much as it was yours!” He insisted. If he had been more careful, as careful as he should be given his current situation, this wouldn’t have happened. But he was already tired of being careful. Was one evening too much to ask for? One evening of reading books in a bookstore like a regular human being? “I, uh-” He held up his copy of Great Expectations, still holding his breath between sentences as though such a desperate gesture might be able to fix all of his problems. “I was distracted too…”

“Oh- oh, I’m fine!” Willow tried to assure, not wanting the young man to think he’d startled her too badly— even if he had done just that. “Are you alright?” she asked out of politeness. He didn’t seem very shaken, but it was only in her nature to ask in return. Forcing a chuckle, she clutched the book she’d fetched to her chest, as if it could protect her. “I think we’re gonna have to either agree to disagree, or just let me take the blame.” She wasn’t particularly in the practice of letting the guilt fall on someone else when it came to situations that involved herself. “Oh, are you reading Great Expectations?” she asked as she took in the title and cover of the book. It wasn’t one of her favorites- mostly because she’d been forced to read it in highschool, but it was still a classic and staple. In her opinion, it had ghosts that weren’t really ghosts, and that was something she’d been drawn to.

Smiling at the woman’s insistence that she really was okay, Milo allowed himself to relax as much as he dared to. It wasn’t easy, trying to find a balance. Trying to stay aware of his surroundings, while also staying aware of himself. He could only hope one day it would become a part of his routine, something he did without even needing to focus. “I am.” He answered quietly. He wasn’t sure how true that was, but he sincerely appreciated the question. “I mean, if you want to take the blame I have a track record of avoiding responsibility.” He teased, laughing quietly at the fact that he was being entirely honest now. “I’m not going to try and stop you.” Glancing down at the book in his hands, he stared at the cover for a moment too long. There were so many childhood memories connected to it that it was difficult to look away from. “I guess so.” He grinned, offering her a shrug. “My parents made me read it as a kid… I’m kind of missing the simplicity of that, you know? My biggest worry being how quickly I could get to the end of a book.” Finally tearing his gaze away and looking back up at the stranger, he realised he had yet to introduce himself. “I’m Milo, by the way… So, are you going to tell me what you’re reading? Hopefully something far less cliché.”

Part of Willow was glad that the young man hadn’t insisted on taking the blame as many people were often wont to do. Generally that just resulted in a tiring back and forth until they found some sort of compromise, or forgot what they were talking about altogether. “Perfect,” she settled the burden of blame with a chuckle, her smile still warm. “Glad we agreed on that as easily as we did.” He seemed nice despite her nearly running headlong into him. Her head tilted curiously to the side, listening closely while he spoke of his parents and books. “Oh- well that’s...sweet in a way. And it makes sense.” She could certainly relate to wishing for a simpler time, often thinking of the days she’d been able to walk free without fear of breaking someone in half via telekinesis. “Books are a good way to forget the world for a bit.” They were her favorite method of escaping behind painting. “Oh- I’m Willow,” she replied quickly, a little embarrassed that she’d forgotten to introduce herself in the first place. “I don’t think Great Expectations is necessarily cliché,” she offered politely with another little laugh before continuing on. “But mine’s called ‘Leave the World’.”

Amused by Willow apparently being grateful he was readily allowing her to take the blame, Milo realised he was genuinely beginning to enjoy her company. His smile only growing as she talked about the ease of the decision, it was refreshing not being seen as somebody argumentative, or petulant, even if the context could barely be considered serious. “It was a pleasure discussing business with you.” He replied, feigning sincerity as he caught her eye. Raising his eyebrows as she called his actions sweet, he wasn’t sure he would use that word but perhaps from an outsider’s perspective his explanation could be seen as sentimental. “Yeah, you could probably call it that.” He admitted, absentmindedly tapping his fingertips against the cover of the book still in his hands. “I don’t know… I hadn’t really thought about it. I don’t even know why I came here really, I think I might be looking for something that’s just... impossible to find, you know?” His old life, his humanity... Realising the stranger was right, his smile softened into an open, and unguarded expression. Books were a good way to escape, however briefly. And though there were no hidden doorways here allowing him to step back into the past, maybe a brief escape would enough for now. If achieving one was even possible. Maybe it needed to be enough. “Leave the World?” He couldn't say he had ever heard of it. “I don’t suppose there are any tips in there? I could use a vacation from this place.”

The younger man’s words brought a laugh to Willow’s lips, and she was grateful for the bell-like sound as she reminded herself how few and far between interactions like this had been. Sure- she’d talked to people in her self-imposed isolation, had even seen a few humans here and there, but there was nothing that could replace the actual company of another living and breathing person. “I hope I don’t have a bill coming in the mail for this business talk,” she teased back. Her shoulders relaxing another inch while she let herself slip a little further into comfort.

The expression on her face took on a more sincere air as her head tilted curiously to the side, a gentle nod of understanding shaking it in the end. “I think...a lot of people feel that way, if we’re being honest.” And she didn’t see any reason not to be. Even ghosts were looking for something that seemed impossible to find. After all, that was why they’d stuck around in the first place. “But I also haven’t met anyone that hasn’t eventually found what they’re looking for. Sometimes you just need help, you know?” That was the job of the medium or exorcist in her mind— to extend that helping hand when someone needed it. “And sometimes the answer isn’t what we expect, but I think you’ll get there eventually.” Another chuckle shook her gently before she gave her answer. “No tips in there unless you’re looking for ways to survive and deal with the apocalypse. But if you’re looking for some ‘vacation’ books I can take you to some of my favorites?”

Milo laughed too, his eyes shining. “I wasn’t going to but now that I think about it my rent is probably due.” He teased, unable to help himself. He could hardly consider their conversation business talk, but he was enjoying it more than he would ever have expected to. Although he liked his time alone, socialising had always come naturally to him. He had no issue with talking to people, getting to know them when their paths somehow managed to cross with his own. He missed this, he missed making new friends. His smile fading somewhat as Willow became serious again, he appreciated her honesty. It made him sad to know what she was saying was probably true, but it also helped him to feel less alone. Sometimes he just needed to be reminded of that fact. “Yeah, I guess you’re right…” He murmured, knowing the sense of relief would be temporary. How long until he convinced himself otherwise? Until his own mind erased Willow’s wisdom? “It’s easy to forget sometimes, you know? Especially when your problems are so… specific.” He admitted, offering her a hesitant shrug.

A smile tugging at his lips again, the mention of hope was comforting, regardless of the fact that everything felt pretty hopeless right about now. He was more stable than he had been, though still not used to his new life, still close enough to his old one to actively grieve for it. “You really think so?” He asked, knowing his longing would be obvious in his voice. He made no effort to hide it, too distracted by the mention of finding answers, by the sound of Willow’s heartbeat, by the book in his hands still reminding him of his childhood. “I really hope so…” Maybe she was right. Harsh was helping him now, and things were getting better. The progress was slow, but it still counted as progress. “Thank you.” His smile became more genuine as he felt a strange rush of affection for the woman he barely knew. Apparently she believed in him, apparently she was convinced one day he might actually be okay again. “Hm, I think tips on how to survive might be more useful to me than vacation books.” He was only half teasing. “But if you’d be up for the company, I’d love to see some of your favourites.”

“Well- you’ll just have to send over the prices so I can get a look at them. My sister’s actually better with stuff like that anyway, so I’ll probably pass them on to her,” Willow chuckled. It was true though. Meg had needed to negotiate quite a few contracts along with her manager when it came to her spot as a blossoming celebrity. She’d missed this as well. Even though she’d always been a little more on the quieter side, Willow had always loved seeing a new smile wherever she could find them. Her warm expression shifted into concern another time as Milo continued to speak of his problems. She might not have the abilities to go along with being a proper medium, but she’d still been raised as one, and along with that came a compassion geared towards helping. “Well if you ever need reminding just message me, alright? I’m easy enough to find on the town forums. My full name’s Willow Finch if you want to search me, though.” Maybe she was coming on too strong when it came to being helpful, but it’d always been hard for her to draw that line. If she wanted to help, why shouldn't she make sure the other person knew it without a doubt?

“Of course I think so,” Willow repeated with another soft smile, already happy to see the smallest flash of hope enter into Milo’s eyes. “I haven’t met a person yet that couldn’t find what they were looking for. Even if it took time. And even if it wasn’t what they were expecting.” The poor guy. She could practically feel the desperate wanting in his voice, could recognize it because she herself was on a seemingly hopeless quest for answers when it came to her own problems with telekinesis. There had to be an end...right? But a smaller voice in her mind reminded Willow that endings weren’t always happy. Nevertheless she brushed it aside, and turned to start on her way towards her favorite section of the store. “Come on- I think we can find some books that fall into both categories,” she finished with a grin over her shoulder.

Milo continued to smile in response to the joke, leaning into the way this woman seemed able to distract him from his problems, if only for a brief moment in time. He could see she was being genuine, that she actually wanted to help, and he wasn’t used to that. Not anymore. “I hope she doesn’t take a cut of the check?” He teased, his smile growing as she insisted she was always going to be there if he needed a reminder that all hope wasn’t lost. It was an odd thing for a stranger to offer, but given his life as of late, he didn’t feel as though his gauge on what was normal even functioned anymore. It had been permanently shattered when he woke up as an official member of the undead. Slipping his phone from his pocket, he held it out to her, encouraging her to plug her name and number into his list of contacts. “I might take you up on that, you know…” Why not? What did he have to lose by making another hesitant friend? “Willow Finch… your name has superhero vibes, has anybody ever told you that?” His eyes were shining as he was reminded of who he used to be, the kid who spent his free time split between the comic book store, and the many questionable establishments White Crest had to offer him. He was still very much that person, but nothing felt quite so simple anymore. He only wanted things to be simple.

His smile fading when Willow insisted he would eventually find what he was looking for, some sense of peace, some way of being content with what he had become, maybe even some level of control when it came to fighting against the bloodlust continually scratching the back of his throat, he was impatient, but he was also happy just to believe that the answers were out there. He would find them, and maybe, just maybe, he would be okay. Surprised when she started to walk away from him, he faltered before hurrying to fall into step beside her, holding his breath as her movement caused the smell of her blood to permeate the air. He didn’t know what she meant by both categories, surely survival books and vacation books were on two very different ends of a spectrum. But he didn’t care, he wanted to understand, he wanted to follow her. Because, for some reason, she made him feel like there was hope, like he existed as more than some miserable outcome, and that was proving to be incredibly rare.

#c:willow #milo and willow

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saladejin · 4 years

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Call An Uber? | 09

BTS x Reader | idolverse au, uber driver!Reader, translator!Reader | Fluff, flirting, super slow burn, angst and hurt/comfort, mature themes and eventual smut

Summary: Your normal life with a normal, yet inconsistent job gets drastically changed when your dreams come true. Sounds boring right?

What happens when all of this occurs, but you’re still doing something you love AND getting a large sum for it? Now there’s something to think about, and it’s definitely not what you’re thinking.

Warnings: None

Word Count: 2.4k

< masterpost >

»»————- <<prev | next >> ————-««

“Uh, no you don’t.”

I gasped when the phone was suddenly plucked from my hands. It had been a struggle to find a close-by Uber service, but one had honestly just popped up!

“Bang PD-nim?”

The older man chuckled and returned the phone to my trembling hands. When had he even appeared next to me? He was dressed so casually that I had to look twice to make sure it was even him.

“I can drop you home for a lot less, trust me (Y/n).” He laughed again, and it was obvious I had no choice but to follow him speechlessly. A week or so ago, this would have appeared as quite strange and inappropriate to many people, but I knew the stout CEO well enough now to place my trust in him.

“T-thank you so much, you really don’t have to…” I spluttered and gawked when his expensive car came into view. The reason why he’d even come along to the concert was still unknown. Up until this point, I’d been under the impression he usually didn't get involved with the showy stage side of things, but even so, he had obviously come of his own accord.

“It’s fine. After everything you’ve done for us tonight, it’s the least I can do.” Bang PD sighed, and I knew he was thinking about Soojin’s brashness from earlier in the day.

“That’s completely okay, I really enjoyed myself tonight,” I said calmly, thinking hard about what I was about to suggest. “Actually, I wouldn’t mind helping out like this more often. If they ever need anyone, that is.”

Bang PD smirked at me, and I knew he was teasing at the underlying feelings I had for the members in particular. The fact that I was already missing them and it hadn’t even been an hour said quite enough. There was no denying that it did play a big role in my offer, but it wasn’t everything of course.

“I can think of a few reasons why, but unfortunately it’s not in your job description.”

I laughed and exhaled in slight disappointment, my shoulders sagging in defeat. “I know, it’s only if they need someone though.”

The car ride was silent for a few minutes, and we would be reaching my house soon after seeing how fast his flashy car zipped around the streets and backroads of Seoul.

“I have something serious to say to you, (Y/n).”

I immediately grew apprehensive at his tone. I mean who wouldn’t after hearing something like that? I picked at the leather seat underneath me and willed my eyes to not drift towards the scenery rocketing past the window. I needed to show him my full attention here.

“I came tonight for one reason only, and that was to monitor you.”

Back at it again with the bluntness it seemed. Classic Bang PD.

“Monitoring me? That sounds kind of sinister.” I pursed my lips and trained my gaze onto the man’s bespectacled face. He wasn’t looking back, but it wasn’t as if I expected him to while he was driving anyway. I was, on the contrary, glad to not be confronted with his piercing eyes, because the anxiety about the direction this conversation had taken would have surely consumed me whole.

“It’s not that bad,” he said while chuckling, “I just wanted to check up and see how you were doing, but you never saw me backstage. Heaven forbid Soojin-ssi actually informed you of anything properly. I had an opening in my schedule, and I hadn’t visited the concerts for a while.”

I shook my head and laughed along with him. He knew exactly of his assistant’s behaviour, and it seemed he definitely wasn’t the only one. This wasn’t the outcome I was expecting, but I felt appreciative of his caring nature, nonetheless.

“What I noticed…” he then drew out, and a sense of uneasiness fell onto us both.

“Was your relationship with Bangtan themselves.”

Now the hammer dropped. Horror lit up like a wildfire inside me, and I suddenly thought about all my interactions with the boys so far. Dazed eyes scanned the disappearing road in front of me as the cogs within my mind started breaking to pieces. A simple touch could be considered crossing the line with them. I was only a mere staff member, therefore I couldn’t expect anything more or less than simply that, but thinking about it now reminded me that I definitely had not been acting like it.

I must have gone too far. Hell, I literally hugged two of them tonight! That’s a recipe for scandal disaster right there, what the fuck (Y/n).

“I can see your brain working, please don’t overthink about what I just said,” Bang PD’s tone became louder as if trying to speak over the flurry of thoughts. I couldn’t help but swallow thickly and sat back into the plush car seat behind me. I rubbed the clamminess off my palms and steeled myself to hear whatever he had to say next.

“Sorry PD-nim, I know I’ve been…closer than I need to be, I guess.”

He suddenly let out a wheeze of a laugh, and I wished to open some kind of window into his mind just to understand what was happening. He took one glance at my furrowed brows and stifled another laugh.

“No way (Y/n), I wasn’t going to say it was a bad thing at all! Well, hear me out please. I want to be serious for a minute.”

I let out a bellowing sigh of relief and managed to let any amusement die down. If he wanted to be this serious, it meant that something extremely important needed to be understood.

“The boys are solely focused on their idol careers, so when it comes to hiring new staff we try to avoid potential ‘risks’, so to speak. It’s a precautionary thing, but – you don’t have to concern yourself with that notion, because you’ve managed to prove yourself again and again. (Y/n), you’ve been working with us for only a few weeks now, but you’ve only solidified my opinions.”

I was smiling now, because the man’s words were so heartfelt and honest. I wondered straight away if he was about to open up to me somehow. This didn’t usually happen, right? Or maybe it did, because he just liked being a boss that staff members could be comfortable and adaptable with.

“You have the best of intentions, I know this for sure, but that isn’t the problem,” he continued while gaining a more solemn tone, “The issue itself, is attachment.”

Another hammer, ah yes. I should have seen this one coming from a mile away.

“Now, I don’t have a problem with you and the boys getting along well. Many of the staff are close with them, and it’s not something out of the ordinary because there are so many faculty members that have been with us from the beginning. It’s only natural.”

When he turned to gauge my response from over the rim of his glasses, I found myself nodding in earnest understanding. I completely agreed with what he was saying, because there was no way you wouldn’t form a substantial bond with the very people who had helped you rise to the top. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what the man was trying to get at exactly, though.

“You-”

He stopped and cleared his throat loudly, obviously racking his brain for the right words to use. It left me dumbfounded, because Bang PD had always come right out with whatever was on his mind. Sometimes it was a little too harsh, but most people valued his opinions and appreciated his level of honesty whether it hurt them or not. This industry did teach their employees to deal with no-nonsense attitudes.

“Not including the backstage crew at the venue, you have been one of the youngest staff members we’ve hired in a while.” He finally sighed, and my mind created the imaginary train tracks steering straight to the point.

“I’m not fearing the attachment you may develop if you continue to spend time with them, but I do fear things going awry or their focuses being taken away from their careers. Usually, I would remove you from the situation without question right away, but I saw you with them tonight-”

I flooded with sudden embarrassment when he looked upwards to think again, as that meant he had most likely seen the hugging too. There was a cold dread settling into my stomach at the thought of getting ‘removed’. That would mean the cost of my job and everything I had worked for so far. I would feel empty, because now that the boys were in my life, I didn’t want them to just vanish.

Oh God, why had I let myself get attached already??

“I understand, actually,” I murmured, “and it would probably be for the best if I didn’t see them as much.” I managed to force it out through half gritted teeth. It really did hurt me to say, but I could see that it was the best option. Who knew what hardships would come later if I continued the way I was going?

“That’s not what I’m saying, I said I saw you with them tonight, but I didn’t mean it in a bad way.” Bang PD started to slow down the car, and I knew we had finally reached the entrance to the carpark of my apartment building.

At his statement, I couldn’t help but feel confusion tickling the edges of my mind. The founder of Bighit shifted sideways in his seat to give me his full attention. Now, he could finally focus without having to divert his thoughts to not crashing and killing us both.

“They were nervous wrecks before the concert started. And I know this because I went in there just before you arrived to have a chat with them all. I could tell that Namjoon-ah would be just fine, and they all would’ve been in the end, but seeing the members like that is never comforting.”

I was fully enraptured by the man’s words, because I had never heard him speak with such a deep and sympathetic tone before. I speculated on when he had last talked to somebody like this.

“There wasn’t much I could do. I’ve supported them through the years, and they know they can always confide in me if they ever need to,” he continued while nodding forlornly. “But when it comes down to live events like these, there’s only so much I can say to help them out. And I'm rarely around as it is.”

The sudden silence urged me to convey my thoughts on the matter. “It’s nearly impossible to get rid of the nerves and doubts once they’re there anyway,” I spoke softly, eyes distant as I fiddled with my own hands uneasily. The atmosphere was more disconcerting than ever now that we had managed to find the time to stop and think.

“That’s what I thought too, but then you came in.” Bang PD chuckled and started tapping his fingers on his leather lined steering wheel to an imaginative rhythm.

“I literally watched as you made their tension disappear like it was nothing. Many people envy you when it comes to your ability to read a situation like that, because it was like you knew exactly what to do, and I’m sure they appreciated it more than you know.”

I almost choked at his sincerity. I hadn’t seriously done all that much, just held a small conversation before the show had commenced. It was only because one of the stylists had asked me to help out, otherwise I may not have even made contact at that time.

“Really? Thank you so much for saying that,” I dipped my head lightly, because I also wanted to hide the sudden spell of emotions from showing too much.

“Afterwards as well.” He sighed, and I watched him begin to smile with approval. “They were so happy, but you made them even happier in an instant. Jimin-ah too. Anyone who cared to watch could see it.”

At this point, I couldn’t help but laugh in a bizarre mixture of disbelief and amazement. Maybe I had just felt so ecstatic in their presence that I hadn’t even known their behaviour was changing too.

“This isn’t something they’ll likely admit, but I think I have an idea about how they’re feeling.” Bang PD cleared his throat. “You might just be the consolation they need, (Y/n). They have always had each other and their many supportive staff to help them find their footing, but I think you might be the key to keeping them there. To reassure them, using your viewpoint as a fan of sorts.”

He finally stopped to breathe, and my mind was churning once again at the revelation. He wasn’t even finished, and it seemed he had much left to say.

“You’re basically like a spokesperson. I know they wouldn’t have reason to doubt or disregard anything you have to say about them from their music choices to even their stage images. Min Yoongi came to talk with me the other day, telling me all about how he’d found a way to get over a certain stump in lyric writing.”

“Ah, that boy.” I muffled another chuckle and the softest of smirks made its way onto my features. I was honestly so happy to even think about being a positive influence in their lives, it made me glow from the inside out.

“It’s why I’ve made a decision,” Bang PD spoke again, and I recognised the familiar firmness to his tone that usually meant he was about to drop something big.

“Taking into account what I mentioned before about the attachment, I think it could actually help us out instead. As their presence worldwide grows, so will the pressure, and I want someone they’re comfortable with to be there for them as a support.”

“So, that’s me? What will happen? What am I going to have to do exactly?” I stammered, feeling considerably warmed and buzzed with excitement at the producer’s words. Everything he was declaring sounded like a wistful dream to me right now, but to say I also wasn’t feeling the pressure would be a lie.

“Nothing extravagant just yet.” He held up a hand while stifling a chuckle. “But it’s why I’ve decided to involve you in more activities.”

Okay, now the excitement was ready to detonate.

“And that’s why I’m asking you to go along with them on their next tour.”

tagged: @l4life, @joyful-jimin, @gee-nee, @m0chilattae, @rossemayme, @doilooklikeinoe

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herstarburststories · 4 years

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Batfam Headcanon: Pregnancy

✾ Request: Can I request a batfam headcanon? Batboys reactions when Kory says she’s pregnant of Mar’i. Btw love you page💕

✾ A/N: You teased me about dickkory, now you got a bible. That’s how it goes. Also, added Babs, Alfred and Bruce as bonus. And I’m glad you enjoy my work! Ps: I barely know Duke, tha’s why he doesn’t show up here.

✾ Disclaimer: Main relationship is Dick Grayson x Koriand’r. Mentions of Tim x Steph and Tim x Kon (kind of?). Check my Fandoms’ liist to see which Ships I’ll write for.

━─┈ ✧

Dick Grayson

I'm gonna use unpublished Nightwing #30 here: he and Kory had sex when he was getting ready for the agente stuff.

Once Agent 37 is off the deal, they end up finding each other again. A bit before Dick gets shoot.

And then, as usually it is between the acrobat and the alien princess, they do it again.

Over and over again.

She gets pregnant and finds out by the time Dick is amnesic.

Don't @ me DC would do that.

Kory flies towards Bludhaven & talks to him. It's not exactly successful. As he had said to Babs before, he didn't want his memories back. Ric was happy without Dick's conscience.

But Starfire isn't asking for her; it's about him, of course. He should be himself, he worked very hard through years to become who he truly was. But mostly, she begged him to come back because of a new addition to their lives.

Pregnant alien!!

At first, Ric Grayson doesn't believe it. Actually, part of him is aware that's true, he can feel it in the change inside his heart when he saw her; something similar to shame and adoration and excitement at once. Kory moved, talked, and seemed like someone he could love, be completely crazy about.

But he wasn't a father!

Koriand'r leaves, and Grayson is by himself again. Without his Gotham or Titans affiliates.

And, for the first time, there is no comfort in that.

He could tell she wasn't lying. Even though a part of his treacherous new mind tried to convince him otherwise.

Grayson's mind didn't know any gorgeous alien, let alone a pregnant with his child alien.

Yet, Dick felt like he had her in his veins. Just like he did with Bruce, Damian, Barbara, Donna, and the others. Tickles behind his skin, a red alarm for a memory that was long lost. But the sensation of keeping it somewhere remained inside him.

Although, when it came to the redhead princess, the warmth inside him was more intense.

Dick was going to be a father. He didn't even know his whole self and would be needed to take care of someone else. Someone small, part of him, and the legacy of the Flying Grayson's. Besides, he didn't even actually remember the mother of his kid.

didn't even remember making the kid.

He calls Bruce. Telling him to bring the antidote that Barbara was keeping if he wanted his memories back.

Not for him, not because it was the right thing, not because of everyone who claimed to love him cried for Dick to do that. Not even because of familiar senses holding into him every time he interacted with someone from his past.

But because he was going to be a father.

This decision was for his child.

When Bruce, Babs, and Damian ask why, he doesn't answer.

He remembers now, and he needs to find Kory.

It's scary, exciting, and the biggest surprise she ever gave to him-- even more scandalous than the day she fell on earth and kissed him.

A dad! He would be a dad!

Jason Todd

It all started off as an unusual ordinary day;

Roy got himself in trouble, Jason went to help him and the little problem became a bigger situation. Roy called Kory and a few minutes later, the situation was replaced by dust and fire smell. No one died, but it was enough to make the villains leave.

In the middle of ''What the fuck they wanted?" & "Who were they?" wonders, the original Outlaws heard a familiar motorcycle's noise which made Jason huff, Roy arch eyebrows and Kory confused.

Dick Grayson was there.

He was hysterical, blue eyes flaming with worry and relief towards Kory. Between their couple discussion and the others attempt to understand what was going on

Were they back together? Did dick know about the outlaws' way and was sticking his nose where it didn't belong? Did the titans need kory urgently?

Until 'pregnant' left Dick's lips, being followed by Kory's chaotic scream of "Just because I am pregnant, it does not mean I can not fight!"

Roy just had to get closer to them and explain that it would make no good to go through stressful situations, especially if he got it right.

A deep breath would be taken, and then Dick would apologize to Kory, saying he was just really scared for both of them. She'd look at her Outlaw friends and curve the corner of her lips-- that Kory smile that translate into 'I've seen hell and chose to use its flames to warm up the cold places of my heart.'

‘’Jason, Roy. . . I am expecting a baby.’’

Meanwhile, Jason was taking off his helmet and glaring at his friends with a perplexed look on his face. Also, a slightly desire of punching Dick. Last time he had heard of their relationship, it was about both of them avoiding each other, his older brother telling him to take care of Kory and Jason calling Dick an idiot. Yeah, he had to have a chat with him later.

For now, Roy was pulling him and Kory into a group hug.

Almost felt like their old times together.

Roy: Outlaw baby!! / Dick: Excuse me?

Tim Drake

Okay, okay. First of all, he wasn't planning on seeing any member of his family for a quite while. Not that Tim didn't want to, he was just really running out of time. Being Young Justice's leader was a full time job, and he wanted to be excellent at it.

But things don't always pass by as they were settle to. Therefore, when a disaster happens and Conner, of all people, gets hurt, Tim is in a delicate state of mind.

Drake is smart. He knows it isn't just about Conner. It's all the small things he's been keeping since Gotham.

Not enough sleep, but a certain amount of coffee to make his hands shake when it's late enough for the sun to come out weakly. His relationship with Steph is growing with disagreements from both lives; heroic and urban. His best friend is hurt because he analyzed too much a situation instead of telling his team what to do, so they made their independent choices. A dumb mistake, the kind that Batman would be disappointed of. Tim himself was biting his own neck about it. How could he be a leader? He should be better than that.

And then, he made a call. Because of all things he might be and might not be, he wasn't Batman.

Tim had friends, and a brother that would know what he was going through.

And he knew how to ask for help sometimes.

Dick comes by as fast as possible. They go to the roof and talk it out.

"Remember that they aren't just your team, Tim," He would say, a tranquil smile on his face. It's so similar to how he explained his relationship with the Titans when Drake was still Robin years ago. "They are your family. It's impossible for you not to be affected when they get hurt or something goes wrong. But they are alive. They still trust you. They believe, and need you. You need to give yourself some credit, and do your best for them."

OF COURSE Tim is stubborn about that because Dick is Dick and he basically grew with the Titans, it wasn't the same thing. He didn't have his older brother's skills to command, communicate, etc.

It was scary.

"Yet, Tim, a lot of things are scary. But you have to keep going. For who needs saving. For yourself. For the people you love."

His tone is too sentimental, even for Dick's big brother moments.

"You need to find something to fight for. That's how you keep going, even when you make mistakes. Good news, you already have it. "

Tim: Yeah, I think so. . . You came back to the Titans? I still have access to the computers.

Dick: Yeah, no. Kind if. It's complicated.

Tim: "Complicated? Like. . . Alien kind of complication?"

Dick: "You should know about that, huh?"

BLUSHING, STUTTERING TIM. Cutting it because I already mentioned Steph, but I couldn't miss this opportunity ok.

Dick just laughs about it.

"Starfire isn't complicated, but yeah. We are still deciding if we will keep in the Titans or if we are going to Bludhaven for now."

"It sounds serious, even permanent."

"As permanent as a baby can be."

HHSHHSUSJJSIUSIE

BABY?

IS SHE PREGNANT??

Yeah, Tim was pretty wake, and shaking, and his brain felt like burning right now.

OH MY-- DICK

He was going to be a FATHER.

"YOU ARE GONNA BE A PARENT!"

But then, Dick was the older one and the best with kids.

"WAIT, SHE WILL BE HALF ALIEN. An hybrid. In nature, two different but similar species can procreate, but their kid can't have kids. Do you think--"

"Tim, calm down. Can you at least give me congratulations before talking about my unborn child's probable infertility?"

Damian Wayne

He knew Kory and Dick had been seeing each other again.

Therefore, making one of them notice his presence before showing up was necessary.

He didn't want to accidentally see profanity between his brother figure and his team's current leader, thank you.

After an obvious noise, he got in Dick's apartment.

As expected, Starfire was there.

She was standing up, and Grayson and looking at her tearful, while holding her belly.

It wasn't possible.

Grayson wouldn't be that irresponsible, would he?

Of course he would.

" So, I supposed Starfire either has a deadly bellyache, or you two are procreating. "

He is mildly fearing that Dick won't have much time for him, but that's a matter for another time.

BONUS!

Bruce Wayne and Alfred Pennyworth

Dick visits the manor with Kory someday.

He had to give the news or Batman would end up knowing anyway.

Honestly, it wasn't about that. He actually wanted to tell Bruce about his baby.

Alfred was there when they exchanged greetings, politely as usual.

‘'We are having a baby.'’

Listen, Bruce knows how to keep his emotions under his skin, but his eldest son being a father?

This must be the most real expression he has showed in years, and it's full of emotions; he is content, and surprised, and worried.

Some would say that Alfred was tearfully, but kept his posture. Master Bruce really made it. Obstacles, of course, even more than necessary at times. Yet, he was going to be a grandfather, and master Dick was becoming a father.

Gotham had a sunny day for once.

Barbara Gordon

If it's not Kory and Babs' baby, she will be aunt Babs

Something happens, help becomes needed.

Nightwing shows up in the middle of the combat, he was in Gotham to talk to Bruce & Alfred & Damian, anyway.

Batman dispersed him, though.

And Batgirl was confused by Batman's choice, especially after listening to his explanation:

"Nightwing, this is more dangerous than our usual job. I will take Robin and Batgirl. You have more urgent thinks to be taken care of. "

The dynamic duo leaves and there is just two long time friends.

It doesn't take a half second for Barbara to notice Dick hiding something.

Sigh, sigh, sigh.

"All right, Dick Grayson. What did you do?"

"Apparently, a baby."

????????????

"He has been ditching me since he learned about Kory's pregnancy."

"KORY'S WHAT!?"

"You didn't even tell me you two were back together!"

"You lost your virginity to an attractive alien and now she is pregnant with your child. That is. . . Surprising."

"I am really happy for you, Dick."

"Thank you, Babs. . . You know what? Maybe it's time to actually introduce you to Kory."

Communicator ringing.

"After I take care of something. Go home, dad."

124 notes · View notes

blucmoon · 3 years

Photo

━ ☾ ⊹ ( im jaebum, cis male , he/him ) say hello to AE YONGGUK, the TWENTY SIX YEAR OLD that seems to have a lot in his hands with HIS job as a STALL OWNER, DRUMMER AND OCCASIONAL BARTENDER! beyond that, they seemed RESPONSIBLE AND TRUSTWORTHY upon first glance. i heard someone say they’re sort of EVASIVE AND INSECURE though. HE seems to live in a 4 BEDROOM HOUSE in YUNHWA, SOUTH KOREA. anything else to add? oh, yeah! he also RUNS A STALL CALLED “KODACHROME” WHERE HE TAKES PHOTOS FOR IDS, SELLS PRINTS AS WELL AS BOOKS SESSIONS FOR PHOTOSHOOTS.

basic information

full name: ae yongguk

nickname(s): guk, yonggu (hasn’t figured out why)

age: 25

date of birth: january 6th, 1995

birthplace: seoul, south korea.

hometown: yunhwa, south korea.

current location: yunhwa, south korea.

ethnicity: asian.

nationality: korean

gender: cismale

pronouns: he / him

orientation: demiromantic, bisexual.

occupation: stall owner and drummer of a band called “crux”. sometimes he helps at his aunt’s bar in busan for some extra money.

living arrangements: house #4012, hwesakgu.

language(s) spoken: korean, english (conversational)

physical appearance

faceclaim: got7’s im jaebum “jb”

hair color: like almost everyone, he has naturally brown hair but throughout the years he’s dyed it blonde or black a couple of times. right now, it’s black and he has managed to grow it to a length he really likes below his chin. yongguk can be usually seen with his hair down and every so often he puts it up in a half updo. whenever the band has a gig, he exerts a little more effort (even if most of the time it doesn’t pay off).

eye color: brown. (likes colored contacts every now and then)

height: 179 cm

weight: 66 kg

build: lean person, with a good muscular frame.

distinguishing characteristics: two beauty marks right next to each other on his left eyelid.

tattoos: has a full sleeve on his left arm from shoulder down to a little above his wrist and another one his right forearm.

piercings: lobe and upper lobe in both ears, anti-tragus on the left one, double helix on the right, anti-eyebrow and nose on the right side of the face (won’t ever use jewelry during the day though).

clothing style: while he’s working at the stall he has a more casual style consisting of jeans, cargos, pants, button downs, sweaters. likes layering with denim shirts, flannels, jackets, windbreakers over t-shirts, etc. mostly in earthy colors, dark reds and blues, white, gray and black. no matter what though, he will always wear long sleeves, even in the hottest summer days and never roll them up, going to these lengths just to not draw any unnecessary attention. (he’s even gotten a fair amount of rash guards for those occasions when he feels like going for a swim.)

at the bar or at gigs, he’s usually clad in all black or dark tones. sleeveless shirts or those with short sleeves are his go-to, not nearly as concerned to conceal the ink over his arms from the public eye at night. he likes to choose style and comfort when performing, thus splurging a little more on his nightly outfits rather than those he uses on the daily. leather and denim jackets, bombers, sometimes harnesses, jeans in either black or leather, boots, sneakers, muscle shirts, graphic t-shirts, shirts with the first buttons undone and rolled up sleeves in dark, rich colors. style varies from street fashion to grunge to rocker depending on how he feels.

health

sleeping habits: goes to sleep really late but has no trouble waking up early to go to to work, though for the first couple of hours he’s awake and if he has gotten 4-5 hours only, he’d be kind of silent and unresponsive until getting that first cup of coffee. will likely nap before his shift at the bar only for an hour and a half tops.

eating habits: eats 3 - 4 times a day and gets easily hungry between meals. often seen snacking whatever he can.

exercise habits: doesn’t really exercise much constantly, but on the weekends he likes hiking or running around town.

emotional stability: 6/10

body temperature: average

addictions: none

drug use: experimentally a couple of times, hasn’t done it in a while.

alcohol use: socially, medium-high tolerance.

personality

label: the opaque (unable to be figured out; hiding behind a façade; not transparent.)

positive traits: reliable, responsible, hard-working, trustworthy, loyal, thoughtful, generous, creative, passionate, artistic, caring, considerate, devoted.

negative traits: defensive, evasive, cautious, indecisive, defiant, self-doubt, fluctuating self-esteem, conflict-averse, private, self-conscious, sensitive, unpredictable.

hobbies: starting songs he never finishes, watching the same show every year (avatar the last airbender) as well as his comfort movies, cloud/star gazing, jigsaw puzzles, origami, video games, playing guitar sometimes.

habits: knuckle cracking, muttering under his breath, snacking between meals, rubbing hands together, jaw clenching, gesturing while talking, rubbing the back of his neck, running hands through hair, drumming fingers, sings along to songs and sings gibberish for the parts he doesn’t know, doodles on any paper at reach, dozes off when bored/daydreams, bobs his leg while sitting.

zodiac sign: sun capricorn, moon pisces, rising scorpio (read as: impending disaster)

mbti: infp

enneagram: 6w5

temperament: melancholic

hogwarts house: ravenclaw

moral alignment: chaotic good

primary vice: wrath

primary virtue: diligence

element: water

expanded personality

yongguk has a strong tendency to appear quiet and reserved and it might come off as standoffish or easily confused with snoberish, which makes it worse when he doesn’t go out of his way to change this preconception about him. he needs a great deal of personal space, both physically and mentally, and any attempt to control him or forcibly schedule his activities will only strengthen his need for time alone.

he’s responsible, trustworthy and hardworking. relies heavily on his intuition to guide him and knows how to patiently wait as well as how to adapt to any circumstances. in yunhwa, he’s been forced to learn how to interact with the townsfolk and through the years he’s mastered the front he puts on in order to remain below the radar and not get any unnecessary attention; polite, helpful, sometimes even considered as a sweet guy, yongguk has no problem lending a hand to anyone that needs it.

however, in busan, his adaptability is also handy when it comes to dealing with customers. at the same time, it’s in these moments when he feels a little less restrained and allows himself to be less calculative: flirty, playful, sometimes misleading… he’s gotten in several problems because of this and yet he has no plans to stop it anytime soon.

yongguk is a little insecure and with a fluctuating self-esteem: sometimes he’s very well aware and confident on his skills and assets, but other times he will second-guess everything about himself. this combined with an strong fear of failure that stems from poor past decisions, makes him hesitate when it comes to making important calls that could potentially affect his future, but he knows how to play it off… most of the times.

despite appearing simple at a glance, yongguk is more than what meets the eye. friendly but private, polite but passionate about his beliefs, calm and sometimes expressionless. it’s not that he doesn’t have feelings - he actually runs quite deep and strong - it’s just that he conceals them under a mask of politeness because he’s unsure how to deal with them; he’s restrained when it comes to conveying emotion, but has a very deep care for his peers. might be awkward and uncomfortable with expressing himself verbally, but has a wonderful ability to define and reveal what he’s feeling on paper.

yongguk is genuinely interested in understanding others, a good listener, but will exclusively share his sorrows and woes only with the friends he trusts the most, unafraid to display his best and worst with them. his natural intuition allows him to sense the mood without the need of words. however, he can be quite impressionable and be easily influenced by the moods of others, which may often lead him to feel overwhelmed because of this.

incredibly curious, yongguk loves to explore with his hands and his eyes, touching and examining the world around him with cool rationalism and spirited curiosity. he explores ideas through creating, troubleshooting, trial and error and first-hand experience. yongguk can be a challenge to predict, even by the closest people to him. can seem very loyal and steady for a while, but he has a tendency to build up a store of impulsive energy that explodes without warning, taking his interests in bold, new directions.

with a good memory, he can recall experiences from the past down to smallest details. this is both good and bad: remembering the good memories is a way to ease himself when in stressful or sad situations, but he’s also prone to dwell on previous mistakes and regret them for a long time.

he’s not consistently angry. will either let the anger build up and release it all at once in an outburst or let it out slowly through small, critical remarks throughout the day. sometimes, both. he’s very difficult when annoyed, but it usually doesn’t last that long. a perfectionistic through and through, his main source of anger usually comes from things not being up to their standards. not good at sparing others’ feelings when he does become irritable. doesn’t like conflict and will go to great lengths to avoid it. in those occasions where he does have to face it, he will approach it from his feelings and mistakenly place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. yongguk will react to the emotions he’s going through and won’t care whether or not he’s right, which makes him appear irrational and illogic.

background (tldr)

his parents work in the field with doctors without borders.

yongguk was born in seoul and lived there for six years before his parents sent him to yunhwa to stay with his grandparents while they went abroad.

seven years passed, his parents would rarely contact them, much less visit them.

in the meantime, his grandma taught him how to play many instruments, being a musician herself and he was enrolled in kwangsook academy.

at thirteen they returned and guk moved with them back to seoul. around this time he became more reserved and quiet, the conversation always focused on his parents achievements and interests.

he made it his goal to become a doctor in hopes of having something in common with them. it was a way to seek their attention and approval.

a year later, a new plan was announced and yongguk was back in yunhwa with his grandparents. he was actually pretty happy about this.

started taking his studies seriously in his junior year of high school, going to the extent of dropping music and every other altogether.

he successfully managed to get into pusan national university, school medicine.

however, the whole experience was something he wasn’t ready for at all. for a year and half he struggled to keep up with his classmates and was utterly ashamed to compare his simple goal of wanting to get closer to his parents to the drive of everyone else.

he drops out after talking with his grandfather, a successful doctor himself.

initially excited to get the chance of truly discovering what he wanted to do, a single call from his father deterred his enthusiasm. he was supposed to return to yunhwa, instead he decided to move in with a friend and stay in busan… where everything goes downhill.

at only twenty and under the fake pretense that he’d get his act together, he allows himself to make mistakes and act recklessly, secretly wishing that’d be enough to get his parents attention.

he found temporary jobs all around busan and never lasted too long, but he still made money and that’s the only thing he really cared about at the moment. things aren’t great, but they aren’t that bad, or so he tells himself.

at twenty one, he gets a full sleeve on his left arm as well as many piercings. a couple of weeks after this, his grandparents decided to pay him a surprise visit and the state of his apartment as well as life… is not optimal.

coincidence or not, his parents video called them at that moment. it was the first time he heard from them in a year, and it was the last time as well.

seems like only his appearance was enough to finally trigger some sort of emotion from his father, but it wasn’t really the kind he was looking for. it was anger and he could clearly see the disappointment in his eyes. a heated argument ensues, one that ends with “you’re not our son anymore.”

perhaps it came a little too late, but it was the much needed wake up call to get his act together. not in order to mend the relationship with his parents, he knew that’d be impossible. but more so, for himself.

he perks up at a suggestion from his grandmother, one that was about a long forgotten hobby of his: photography. he remembers an old shoe box filled with polaroids and undeveloped films under his bed.

thus, he stays in busan after enrolling in a community college for a year-long photography class. around this time, one of his aunts offered him a job as a bartender in her bar and since then he’s been helping her every now and then. he says it’s for extra money, but in reality is a way to repay her from hiring him when no one else would.

after he was done with his course and had saved enough money to get a decent camera, he decided it was time to go back to yunhwa.

he returned three years ago. luckily, his reputation there remained intact and he wanted it to stay that way thus hiding the ink on his skin with long sleeves and removing the jewelry whenever he was outside.

yongguk moved back with his grandparents, this time to help them out and take care of his grandmother who started to get a little ill. he picked up playing and making music after finding his long abandoned drum set in the garage.

with the help of his grandfather, he opened his very own stall called “kodachrome” where he takes photos for ids, sells prints of his own work (mostly of yunhwa’s scenery) as well as books sessions for photoshoots.

a year and half ago, however, he had to find a new place. his grandparents decided to retire and move to jeju. thankfully, he managed to get a deal to rent a house from one of his grandma’s friends. the house was a little too big thus he decided to post an ad online looking for roommates to share the space and ease the expenses.

in the present, yongguk is still running his stall and getting contacted every blue moon by small influencers and event planners looking for his services. three nights a week, he goes back to busan to work for his aunt at the bar and every other night he has gigs with a band, which was randomly created after having far too many drinks with his roommates.

background (full)

tw: mentions of needles, tattoos, substances but nothing too graphic.

ae yongguk was the name given to you and and your endearing smiles as well as adorable dimples seemed to be more than enough to have everyone coddling and cosseting you from the get-go. nonetheless, permanency was never on your parents’ agenda. by the time you turned six, they moved away and you were shoved into your grandparents’ household in yunhwa.

it’s difficult to comprehend the sudden change, being told that you’d be living with them for some time. how much? they don’t specify, but the next thing you know is that you’re wordlessly bidding goodbye to your parents, who promised to write and come back for you soon. they didn’t. being part of doctors without borders and making it their goal to offer medical aid where it’s needed most, they put their humanitarian labor before parenthood.

the first letter you got arrived eight months after they left. there’s disappointment and there’s also heartbreak, but they don’t last long. you don’t allow them to regardless of your young age. instead, you focus on how your grandfather, despite having severe and strict ways, squeezed your shoulder and offered the small smile that you know all too well now. or how your grandmother, a renowned musician, didn’t hesitate to shower you in unconditional love. your education didn’t cease and your grandfather immediately enrolled you at kwangsook academy.

one of your most prominent traits is how transparent you are with your emotions and your grandmother easily learnt to read this. it was no surprise that the first time you saw her playing a beautiful song on her baby grand and your irises sparkled with curiosity, she immediately beckoned you closer. “hi, my love.” the elderly woman greeted while shifting a little so you could take a seat beside her. you meet her eyes and you wonder if she’s looking for anything by the time an easy smile appears on her face. “do you like music?” you’re unable to respond, but she must’ve seen something because, after that, she started teaching you the basics of piano. a couple of days later, she asked again and this time around, the answer naturally slipped out of your mouth: i love it.

for your regular classes, you were constant and responsible. sure, you enjoyed learning, but your interest wasn’t inherently there. it was just something you had to do. however, when it came to that newfound love for music of yours, you were the one with the initiative to ask for more lessons and practice whenever you had free time; first the piano, later the guitar and a couple of years later you made the stubborn decision to learn the drums.

it was nice staying in yunhwa, it brought you a comforting sense of belonging. it was the beginning of finding your own voice; discovering your likes and dislikes, some of your talents and even the chance of making friends. however, there was always a lingering question in the back of your mind and a deep sadness you rarely showed: when are my parents coming back?

they do, but only for a short period of time.

you had only turned thirteen, but the moment you saw them you were but an excited kid, joyously yelling and running to hug them, but they greeted you rather… frivolously. you try to ignore the breach between you and them, which you felt the most when you were holding your mother’s hand; her skin a couple of degrees colder than your grandma’s. they ask how you were doing and, in your frenzy, you start talking about everything that’s happened all this time only to be interrupted; the voice you were starting to grow inevitably drowned in the sea of their own achievements and stories.

it’s then that they tell you they’d move to seoul and you’re to go with them. apparently, with the intention to settle down and give it a go to having a normal family. you say goodbye to your grandparents, and unlike your mom and dad, the promises of staying in touch with them are real.

you were silent and reserved around your parents. you had to after learning that no matter what you tried to tell them, the conversation always ended being about what interested them. for a while you pretended to be okay with it, but soon you started wishing they paid as much attention to you as they did to their cause. it made you think that, by immersing yourself in that world, you might be able to keep them interested long enough or make them proud, and your very own obsession to become a doctor started right there. simple questions that had your parents perk up are what made you believe that your plan isn’t too far fetched.

luckily, you were able to retreat to your music whenever everything became too overwhelming, but even this wasn’t enough to stop an ever growing beast called dissatisfaction from making your chest its home. it increases in size and sometimes it’s so big that you’re unable to keep it in your ribcage, coming to light with rebellious little acts such as not doing your homework or bluntly strumming your guitar late at night. eventually, unspoken words and jumbled thoughts find their way into old notebooks full of an amateur’s unfinished songs.

it’s exactly a year later that they announced their new plans of moving to the other side of the world, plans that didn’t take you into consideration at all. it was disappointing, but not really surprising. still, you were able to comprehend the nature of their jobs, after all they were brilliant doctors and only a handful were willing to offer the assistance your parents did. you stop expecting things to change after the farewells you exchanged with them. you wished them the best and truly meant it.

going back to yunhwa at fourteen is something you anticipate; your grandmother welcomed you with your favorite food and your grandfather with a blank notebook. “for your songs, son” he said with that smile of his, learning about this new hobby of yours from one of the many mails you sent them. both were happy about your return and helped you pick up your studies where you last left them.

it’s in your junior year at high school when you truly get serious about your studies, medical school was your single goal. even though you’ve come to terms with the relationship you had with your parents, a hopeful part of you genuinely believed that becoming a doctor would help breach the distance.

and so you do, dropping music altogether and every other hobby that “needlessly” consumed your time and energy. it was admittedly exhausting and you were obviously miserable without playing any instrument. the sleepless nights and the isolation you brought upon yourself paid off the moment you received the news of your acceptance at pusan national university. that very night, you got a call from your parents congratulating you.

for the next year and a half, however, things prove to be extremely challenging when you find yourself amongst thousands of students whose drive and ambition is stronger than simply wanting to get close to their parents. it’s shameful, you admit and the constant pressure as well as the competitive environment soon takes a toll on you, but it was much needed for you to start questioning everything; yourself, your goals and if it was really what you wanted.

the person who helps you to fully come to this realisation is none other than your grandfather, another renowned doctor in your family. it’s shocking to hear him encouraging you to drop out and follow your dreams. truth is you were far too concerned chasing after a hopeless goal than to craft ambitions and dreams for yourself. still, you follow his advice even when you are completely at loss about what the next step would be.

if news of your acceptance travelled fast, so did the news of your departure. you got a call shortly after and all you heard was “we’re very disappointed” followed by radio silence before your father hung up. you were nineteen, about to turn twenty, when they last talked to you.

their silence becomes one of your many excuses to make mistakes and act recklessly; if your good behaviour and your previous little act didn’t catch their attention, this surely will. it’s your shield against the disapproval in your grandfather’s eyes, and that very shield is what stops him from stopping you. even when you told him you wouldn’t return to yunhwa, instead moving to one of your friend’s apartment in the heart of busan.

it’s amusing how easily your grandfather believes your fake promises of trying to get your life together and you feel awful for being such a good liar. you find decent jobs, but never stay too long. unnecessary fights with customers or blatant irresponsibility are the main reasons that force you to find a new one every couple of weeks. you’ve been many things: a busser, a server, even a mascot. you didn’t mind much as long as you were paid.

you willingly dive into a void filled with indulgence and bad decisions. all in order to not think, to not dwell on the future. you used every situation you could possibly get yourself into as a distractor from the painful reality. you were lost, so utterly lost.

twenty one comes around and you decide that, for the first time ever, you’re going to gift yourself something. a permanent work of art, its canvas your skin.

three monthly salaries were spent on black and red ink which reminded you of your favorite place. the needle pierces your skin once, twice, hundred times until your arm is almost fully covered… maybe it was a metaphor, a feeble attempt to display something bright and wonderful on someone who otherwise had long lost every trace of that. it was not enough and a couple of piercings follow in trying to beautify the sheer mess you’ve made of yourself.

some nights you question your own strength and sanity. you used to be pristine, someone to be proud of and an exemplary resident of the town you fondly call home. you were constant, had talent and a midas touch that turned meaningless words into beautiful songs, scribbles onto paper into melodies that had every listener humming along.

what happened to you, boy? says a voice in your head… or is it from your chest? is it the dissatisfaction you’ve tried to keep locked for years? all it took was to be called a disappointment once for you to willingly become one?

it consumes you and every passing day it becomes louder, but you’re stubborn and simply take it as a challenge to find new ways to drown it. headachingly loud music, poisonous substances, liquid trust or the ecstasy under someone’s fingertips… the city swallows you whole and provides you with momentary sweet oblivion but… is the aftermath of impeding remorse worth it? it is, you convince yourself while running back into it’s arms night after night.

one day, without warning, three knocks come onto your door and when you’re about to curse whoever disrupted your game, you’re met with your grandparents. your appearance is deplorable; bloodshot eyes, greasy hair and alarming signs of lack of proper sleep. it hurt to see your grandmother, as crystal clear as you wear, worried and at loss of words. a thing the city taught you was to be a pretender and so you ignore every sign of concern in their faces while smiling at them. “long time no see!” you say cheerfully.

it’s a quiet visit. they don’t know what to tell you or where to start, and neither do you feel a need to fill the awkward silence when your grandfather’s phone went off. he answers without thinking to a videocall and the voice that greets him has you freezing on your spot. father. your face falls and your eyes widen in obvious panic when he asks about you. the older man in the room seems to be equally as frantic as you when he glances at you, taking in how you look before your father speaks again.

“oh, is yongguk there? let me talk to him.” his authoritative tone was enough to have your grandfather turning the phone towards you. it’s late, far too late to fix yourself or even try to hide the glaringly bright red ink on your arm. so, in your frenzy, you decide to play cynical. what else could you lose, right? “hey, dad.” you greet with a shameless smile upon your lips. “your timing is as impeccable as ever.”

the argument that ensues forces you to retreat to your room and you thank whatever universal force that your roommate decided to have a weekend-long trip. it’s a heated fight, and you realize midway through that this is the longest conversation you’ve ever had with your father. why is it that the most display of emotion you get from him is when you don’t follow his ridiculous standards? he gets louder, so do you and it escalates to irreversible words. the last thing he says is “you’re not our son anymore” followed by silence.

then you laugh.

you laugh over the irony of an absent father saying such a thing. you laugh because you don’t want to allow him see you hurting. you laugh at how fucked up the whole situation is. “doesn’t make a difference, does it?” you say between unabashed chuckles. “not like you ever acted like a father, anyway.” and you hang up, your legs giving in and only then did you notice that your whole body had been shaking this whole time.

you muffle a scream on a pillow while feeling so alone and like the butt of the cruelest joke. you want to hate your father and your mother. you want to despise them for their horrible behavior. instead, you find yourself crying like an abandoned kid wanting, yearning for the love that wasn’t given to him. you want to run, to disappear, to hide where no one can find you.

then, two arms wraps around you and even though your grandmother is a little smaller than you, you find yourself feeling protected under her embrace. shortly after comes a pat on your head from your grandfather. you look up at those brown eyes full of wisdom and, when he tells you “everything will be okay, son.” you wholeheartedly believe him

because, a year later, things started looking up.

#INFO.TXT #YONGGUK.EXE #LOC.YUNHWA

1 note · View note

justaghostingon · 4 years

Text

Cogs in a Steel Heart

Chapter 2: Building Trust

Hugo struggles to adjust and Cyrus gets the tea. Aka. Hugo’s got a lot of complaining to do, and Cyrus is having way to much fun watching him struggle at the whole ‘teammates’ thing.

Link to ao3 version: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24331849/chapters/59001811#workskin

The next time Hugo came to report to Cyrus, he and his new team had already completed the water trial. Now most people would be a bit more excited after completing an ancient trial that lay incomplete for centuries. Or maybe just twenty years? Cyrus wasn’t paying attention when Donella explained that. Point was, the way Cyrus saw it Hugo should have been happy, or at least proud.

He was not.

“It’s like pulling teeth with these people!” Hugo tugged at his own hair for emphasis. “I don’t know how I’m going to survive!”

Cyrus raised an eyebrow as the usually calm and in control Hugo proceeded to have as near to a tantrum as he’d ever gotten, ranting and waving his hands like a madman. It was almost...funny.

“The firecracker keeps interrupting me when I’m working, and posturing about catching me in my ‘evil’ scheme-” And heavens above, Hugo actually made air quotes. Cyrus hadn’t realized he even knew what those were, “-as if I’d ever be stupid enough to make something to defeat them in the middle of their camp, what kind of rookie does he think I am? All he’s really doing is getting underfoot when I am trying to help! I need this to work out too! He’s just...uugh!” He threw his hands in the air with such violence it sent him stumbling backwards into a tree.

Cyrus bit the inside of his lip as Hugo sprang back up to punch the tree and scream at it. Thugs don’t smile on the job, and never let it be said Cyrus was not a professional. But he’d never seen Hugo so completely frazzled by simple human interaction. It was karmic really, considering everything Hugo’s usual interactions with people.

Eventually Hugo’s strength gave out and he leaned his forehead against the tree, looking the picture of defeat. And really, if two kids was all it took to wipe him out, Cyrus should have recommended him for babysitting to his neighbors ages ago. Would be good for him.

Hugo let out a deep sigh as his shoulders sagged. “And then there’s Goggles,” he said as he turns himself around to face Cyrus. “He’s a whole ‘nother problem. Always trying to compare notes, talk about “how my day was,” showing off to the kid...” Hugo crosses his arms across his chest. “And he’s not even that good at it! Like half the things he makes blow up! But when I point out his errors, which could get us blown up mind you, he gets all passive-aggressive and tries to do it his way and like come on! I’m not going to die in an explosion because he’s too stubborn to take the help he obviously needs!” Hugo huffed and turned his head away.

“If they are such a hindrance, why not just take both the totems and complete the trials by yourself?” Cyrus points out. As much as he was loving this, they did have a schedule to keep, and the sooner they were done, the sooner they could both go home. He’d get to see Mona in person again, instead of the picture tucked safely against his heart and her daily letters.

Hugo shifted from foot to look, hugging his arms close. “They might not be completely useless in trials,” Hugo grumbled. Then jumped up. “Not that I don’t do most of the work! like 95 percent really, they couldn't do it without me at all.” He ran his fingers through his hair and refused to meet Cyrus’s eyes.

Oh no. Cyrus knew that look. That’s the ‘I screwed up look.’ But surely it couldn’t be too bad, the trial was complete after all.

“But they might have helped a bit at the end there, especially with the final test,” Hugo finished. “I didn’t see through the enchantment like at all, but Goggles,” Hugo sighed. “He pushed it off like it was nothing and dragged me and Firecracker out all by himself.”

Oh. That wasn’t so bad. Why had he been so upset about that? Donella had told him to infiltrate for a reason. His mind flashed back to the first mission he’d ever had with the kid.

------------------

“What did you do?” Hugo screamed in his face, half soaked and feral as a wild cat.

“My job,” Cyrus replied as he pushed the body out of his way in the rain soaked street.

“You ruined the job!” Hugo threw a hand down towards the body between them. “It took me months to get him to trust me!”

Cyrus crossed his arms. “He was about to kill you.” Kill didn’t quite cut it. Rip in half was more fitting, and much as Cyrus disliked the kid, the scene of the twig-like body struggling against an iron grip as the man’s expression twisted into one of sadistic delight...

“I had it handled!” Hugo snarled. “I could have stopped him in a hundred different ways!” He shoved a finger in Cyrus’s chest. “Now we’ll never know where the supply was coming from, and it's all because of you!”

Cyrus slowly reached out and pushed the fingers down. Hugo’s expression tightened for a second under his grip. “My orders were to ensure that man was not a threat. He was a threat. Therefore, I did my job.” He let go and Hugo instantly jumped back, clutching his hand close to his heart and eyeing Cyrus with fury in his eyes.

------------------

“Hmmm,” Cyrus mused. Out of the corner of his eye, Hugo flinched at the sound. “Did you say thank you?” Cyrus asked.

Hugo’s head snapped up. “What?”

“When someone saves you, normally you’re supposed to say thank you,” Cyrus shrugged. “It’s polite.”

Hugo stared at him, mouth hanging open. “I-I totally forgot about that.”

“Might want to give it a shot,” Cyrus pushed off his own tree and started walking away. “See you next week!”

Behind him Hugo let out a very frustrated groan.

------------------

“And then he goes to the boss, whining about how trigger happy I am. Me!” Cyrus took a sharp swig from his drink, feeling the alcohol burn its way down. “After I saved his life!” He smashed the cup down on the table.

“Hey man, I get it,” Lester gives him a hearty slap on the back. “I served my time with the crazy lady and the brat.”

“He’s something else alright,” Cyrus scowled into his drink. “Like some kind of heartless machine.” He turned to look Lester in his slightly blurry face. “You know his eyes were completely blank when that guy was trying to kill him, it's like he wasn’t even there. Freaky.”

“Maybe the crazy lady made him in the back lab,” Lester jokes. “Explains why he never leaves.”

“Makes sense,” Cyrus’s grip tightened on the handle of his mug. “Robot designed to make thugs miserable.”

“Hey man.” Lester shoved him lightly with his shoulder. “You can always quit like I did.”

“Yeah,” Cyrus took another swig and sighed. “But winter is coming, and Mona and I can’t really afford me outta work right now.”

“That sucks man,” Lester took a sip of his own drink. “Hey!” he slammed the mug down so quickly Cyrus nearly fell out of his seat. “I think I know a guy who can help you!”

Cyrus shook his head as he righted himself on his stool. “You do? What’s his name?”

Lester went cross eyed as he tried to think. “No idea,” he said, and grinned. “But when I do I’ll let you know!”

--------------------

Hugo’s team had barely crossed the border to the next kingdom by the time it came for Hugo’s next report, a fact that Cyrus hoped would mean it was mercifully short. He was wrong.

Hugo seemed in a better mood as he approached, arms loose and swinging. “I’ve got some good news for the report,” he said with a two fingered salute.

Cyrus grunted, and Hugo took that as an opportunity to launch into an elaborate story about him and Firecracker. Apparently Hairstripe, who Cyrus assumed was Goggles and not the donkey, had suggested Hugo and Firecracker go on an errand for “team bonding.” Hugo had added air quotes around the last two words, and heavens was that going to become a thing?

According to Hugo, the whole trip had been an absolute bore, in some nowhere town where the only building of consequence seemed to be the jailhouse, (A jailhouse Cyrus did not remember being there when he’d passed through) which had quickly turned into an unmitigated disaster when some noisy shopper had tried to steal their ingredient from Hugo’s hands.

“Well I wasn’t going to stand for that,” Hugo rolled his eyes. “But the shopkeeper was inhuman, I’m telling you. I couldn’t schmooze anything more than a promise not to sell it until sunset, and then only to the party with the most money by the end of the day.”

“How unfeeling,” Cyrus states dryly.

“I know right?” Hugo huffed as he placed a hand on his chest. “No one can resist my schmoozing!” Where was I? Oh yes. Then Firecracker insisted we work for the extra money.” He spat the word work like it was an insult. “Instead of just scamming some quick cash. I pointed out we couldn’t exactly get a job, and he said we could just sell firecrackers.”

Oh that’s going to make this story confusing Cyrus thought. Firecracker selling Firecrackers, it sounds like a kids rhyme Mona would read to the kids next door.

“Meanwhile our dear commentators were doing absolutely nothing with their time, even as we started getting quite a few customers. So naturally I schmoozed up to them to figure out what was going on,” Hugo flipped his hair dramatically.

Cyrus raised an eyebrow. Some confidence after it failed you so miserably earlier in the day, he didn’t say.

“But the blind fools were completely unimpressed,” Hugo pouted. “And then they tried to frame me for thievery. Me!”

The sheer look of outrage on Hugo’s face made the corner of Cyrus’s mouth twitch up. So much for schmoozing.

“I escaped, naturally.” Hugo waved his hand in the air. “But Firecracker got caught when they accused him of stealing their fireworks.”

At which point Hugo derailed the story to rant about how he didn’t really want to save the kid, really! But there was no way Hairstripe would let him stay if he didn’t bring him back, so he really didn’t have a choice, blah, blah, blah.

Honestly it sounded more like Hugo was trying to justify it to himself after the first thirty minutes, but who was Cyrus to judge?

“The point is,” Hugo said as he finally stopped ranting, “I went to the jail as the sun was rapidly sinking in the sky, certain we were going to lose. Only to see the jailhouse before me explode into a gazillion pieces as Firecracker came running out the side.”

That explains why I didn’t see the jail house, Cyrus thought, and why there was a burning pile of rubble while I was walking through.

“Firecracker was pretty happy to see me,” Hugo smirked. “Apparently he didn’t think I would actually come back for him. I asked how he managed to blow up the building when the police had taken all his supplies. Turns out exploding moss grows on old brick. Who knew right?”

“Who indeed,” Cyrus said.

“And this,” Hugo raised a single finger. “Is where I succeeded in forwarding my infiltration goal. You see, I proposed a fiendishly clever plan to get revenge on those who robbed us, and get the prize, and you know what? Yong actually listened to me! He totally backed me up when I told them the exploding moss was a rare alchemic ingredient, and didn’t even lose his cool when one of them held a knife to his neck and demanded we tell them how to use it!”

Hugo threw back his head and laughed at the memory. “The look on his face when it exploded in his hands is one I will treasure for years,” he gasped as he wiped away a tear.

“And exploding a rival helps with your infiltration how?” Cyrus crossed his arms.

“I’m building trust,” Hugo waved the question away.

“Blowing people up doesn’t seem like the most trustworthy habit,” Cyrus pointed out. Especially for someone who is trying not to get himself caught by unstable alchemists willing to destroy whole buildings.

“Oh please, the kid blows up everything in his path if he can help it. I’m just speaking his language. Besides,” Hugo’s shoulders straightened. “I can’t keep up the goody-two shoes act twenty-four seven. I’d go mad. But this way, I’m causing problems for them. So they’ll see me as an asset they can exploit and keep me around.”

Assets for exploitation weren’t typically sent on feel-good-get-along missions with teammates, Cyrus didn’t say. No one cares enough to try to make their work life pleasant. He should know. He had worked for Donella for six years. This Hairstripe, or Goggles, or whatever his real name was, seemed to genuinely want Hugo to feel at home, despite his less than stellar introduction.

But there was no sense pointing that out to Hugo, he thought as he watched the boy preen under the weight of his own cleverness. Not when they had a mission to complete. The less Hugo noticed, the less it would hurt when he inevitably had to leave.

#varian and the seven kingdoms #varian and the 7 kingdoms #seven kingdoms au #varian #hugo the human #yong #cyrus

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