#but also a bad boy who could fuck u up of he chose to do so. get u a man who can do both

[bagels-withcreamcheese]

On second thought I might actually like him. u know . we’ve like ..bonded now. After spending the second night in a row at his place I’m beginning to…Feel things. He is at work currently but I will probably go back tonight. He told me to bring Nessy and just live in his room LOL I might don’t tempt me.

#OK THE SONGHE MADE ME THO #IT WAS SO GOOD WTF #how he did that in less than 10 min was so impressive like u literally sat and watched him make the beat #then he did the audio in one take just freestyled it. ok mr talent. #he said he’ll finish editing it later n send it 2 me <3 #also the amount of showers I’ve taken in the past two days. #5 times. that’s more than I shower in a whole week. #like after we fuck were just completely gross and sweaty so we hop in the shower. #I didn’t even shower after every time just the times when I was really drenched in sweat #anyway tomorrow I gotta wear boots and clothes I don’t care abt bc we’re going to explore the caves under the mill ruins. #we were going to today but I was dressed cute n he didn’t want me to get my clothes dirty #he n his friends literally know all the best abandoned areas in the cities #he’s going to take me on an abandoned building tour YESSS #so fun. the place we went in today was over near dinkytown #it was so so cool #the building was falling apart but there’s no fun without a lil danger #we made our way up to the rooftop and my foot went through the fucking roof like a small section collapsed #I was fine though I didn’t fall luckily but the adrenaline rush. love it. #anyway. he’s so cute agshdhdjdj such a soft boy. a soy boy if u will. a gentle loving girly boy. #but also a bad boy who could fuck u up of he chose to do so. get u a man who can do both #ok I think I might actually like him now he’s so so sweet #also he has so much money . I was like ‘I don’t have a tv’ and he’s like let me buy u one I have more money then I know what to do with #OK bragger #like he’s been paying for everything for us it makes me feel kinda bad bc I am broke but he doesn’t seem 2 mind #anyway anyway. Uli. he’s cute. and talented. and funny. ugh. complete package. #like I have so much to say abt him. we really hit it off I’ve had so much fun with him eeeeeee #tess talks

[steviesbicrisis]

Stranger Things S2 rewatch thoughts

I finally finished rewatching S2 and this is everything I've written down as I was watching lmao

KEITH USED TO WORK AT THE ARCADE?? Also the arcade is right next to family video so Keith just moved next door in season 3 lmao

Steve omg you’re so cute stop

FINALLY MAX IS HERE

Okay Billie is bad, yes? We all agree Billie is bad, right? But Dacre IS SO HOT I CANNOT HE TOOK A “PORCA TROIA” OUT OF ME LIKE IT WAS NOTHING

Honestly they’re so dope for dressing up as ghostbusters and going to school with matching outfits

Ugh Nancy and Steve are so terrible for each other

Steve’s face during the bullshit scene really broke my heart 🥺

People being annoyed at Joyce for being super protective of Will like what?? That boy was proclaimed dead, they had a funeral and he turned out to be in another dimension??? I dare you to not be at least a little paranoid

I’m getting the gayest vibes ever from this basketball + shower scene I’m not even joking, Harrington 100% felt what it is like to be a girl objectified in a nightclub

Billy calling Steve pretty boy is so fucked up like are you Eddie Munson? No so imma need you to back off ✋

Jfc no wonder Vecna chose max she’s a walking gold mine for therapists

One drive with Billy would be enough for me to become a target for Vecna I swear

A part of me will always blame Dustin for the cat’s death 🥲

Stranger things is so good I cannot fucking believe my eyes sometimes

First Nancy, now Hopper… can they like, stop going inside creepy ass portals all by themselves? FFS

OH MY GOD ERICA WAS SO SMALL HOW CUTE SINDFKJDF

Lucas telling Max “if I tell you the truth, you could be arrested or killed. Do you accept the risk?” Hits different now

FINALLY THE DUSTIN/STEVE DUO IS BORN

I was today years old when I realized Nancy broke up with Steve in S1 for a month but then she got back with him because she got tired of waiting for Jonathan

Dustin’s proud smile when Steve told him “good call dude” I CANT IM WEEK IM CRYING ON THE FLOOR

I will never get over Dustin’s pure adoration for Steve in this season

JUSTICE FOR BOB

BOB NEWBY THE SUPERHERO 😭😭😭

Everyone: it’s like the mind flyer! Steve&Max: don’t speak nerd in my presence pls

I’m sorry but Mike holding that small trophy as a weapon LOL

I CANNOT BELIEVE THE KIDS WERE AT THE WINDOW WHEN BILLY CAME ARE STUPID

I cannot believe they wanted to leave a beaten-up and concussed Steve behind, are you crazy???

I totally forgot that Steve, in a span of a couple of hours, pushed his girlfriend to be with another guy, got beaten up defending kids he barely knows and then went down - all beaten up and concussed - the upside down tunnels just for said kids?? ARE U EVEN REAL MAN?

Will turning to Mike when that girl asked him to dance 🥺

Nancy is so fucking right, those girls are so stupid turning Dustin down like fuck you who do you think you are????

Jopper at the end, I love my parents so much

Here my thoughts on S1!

#I know I took a long time #I wanted to savor it okay?? #Steve season 2 is premium quality #I know I mostly talk about steve but like #have you seen my blog??? #you should be surprised when I DONT talk about him #stranger things #stranger things rewatch #random st thoughts #season 2 rewatch #stranger things 2 rewatch

[v-arbellanaris]

the same way that i wish we could’ve gotten some evolving complexity with the party banters in da2 for a lot of the companions, TODAY!!!! i’m having THOUGHTS about what an anders and merrill progression could look like. i know ppl are always doing this for fen & anders and don’t get me wrong... i love them but i’d absolutely run them over to defend merrill bc she deserved BETTER, from the writers and the writing, and from the other companions (except isabela, love them, merrilbela should’ve been canon if neither of them were romanced idc).

like!!!!! some considerations:

anders still obviously struggling with the idea of needing to be a ‘good’ mage in order to be ‘worthy’ of freedom, and merrill representing everything he thinks SHOULD make her a ‘bad’ mage (talking to demons, blood magic, etc) but like... she’s not. she shows him all the kittens hiding around in lowtown and lets them bite her toes. she fixes the feathers on his coat when they’re turned the wrong way without ripping any of them out. she’s the only one who talks TO justice like justice is a living being separate to anders.

and how does anders reconcile that? does merrill deserve to be in the circle “just because” she’s a “bad” mage (according to andrastian standards)? knowing what the gallows are, what’s done there, does anders REALLY THINK “bad” mages “deserve” to be in the circle? ANSWER THE QUESTION, WHITE BOY

bonus points for anders going on about blood magic and merrill literally being like. THAT’S where your line is?? JUST the circle?? that’s where your line is with the chantry?? everything the chantry says about magic is designed to oppress us EXCEPT the stuff about blood magic?? what about the stuff about elves?? what about all of that nonsense?? like are u serious and he’s like ....... oh. i have to think about this

+bonus: surana/amell who chose a blood magic spec or if you gave anders one in awakening. merrill asks about the Rumours and anders either defensively saying wardens use blood magic to fight the darkspawn OR that they’re just rumours (if its him) but it wouldnt matter anyway bc it’s to fight darkspawn. merrill asking why it’s okay to use blood magic to fight darkspawn but not ok for her to use it for the blighted mirror/pointing out that if there’s THAT many rumours about it surely there must be some truth to it. and anders just not being willing to talk abt it or confront it.

ALSO!!! more banters about mahariel!!! positive ones where they can share their memories of them instead of just anders going well the hero of ferelden is rather private (i get they did it to preserve whatever your hc was of your hero but STILL). PRE-BLIGHT STORIES ABT MAHARIEL!!!!

more banters for the dissent quest but instead of it painting anders’ views in the correct light abt how he’s an abomination and merrill could become one (fuck you for that one, writers), it could be more an attempt to understand justice between the two of them. 

or just more exploration/acknowledgement of how becoming an abomination IS merrill’s fear. how anders is maybe being antagonistic to her initially out of WORRY for her too (not just his fucked up andrastian thoughts abt blood magic and “bad mages”)!!!!

follow-up banters where they Discourse about the idea of an abomination maybe? that would be SUCH interesting lore...

MORE DISCUSSIONS AROUND THE INTERSECTION BETWEEN ELF AND MAGE. violence against elves in the alienage under the pretext of “looking for apostates” or “hiding apostates”. violence against mages, tracing it back to arlathan and pointing out that the “fear” of magic (in a non-magical ancient tevinter population) could be inextricably linked to the “fear” of elves. elves being more likely, maybe, to be mages???

!!!!!! merrill talking about how more templars are patrolling the alienage or going into it, looking for “”apostates”” in act 2 or act 3...... anders grimly saying he’ll look into it... updates on this situation in some more banters... leading to the implications that merrill and anders may have killed some templars on patrol... love that for them

NO MORE OF THAT NONSENSE about how elves and humans don’t have any differences in the circle. NONE! OF! THAT! that’s some BS. the chant is telling ppl that elves are furthest from the maker and yet they’re trying to convince me there’s no fantasy racism in the circles from the templars or the mages. absolute BULLSHIT imho

anders asking merrill about how mages are trained by the dalish! the role keepers play! merrill mentioning MULTIPLE mages in the clan and anders being surprised because its “common knowledge” that dalish like... give up their mages when there’s too many per clan and merrill coldly debunking it bc FUCK YOU dai, you’ll pry this from my cold, dead fingers. 

anders growing to respect the way dalish mages are trained, instead of seeing it as inferior, & wishing that the circle could be that supportive. thinking of how many mages he knew would’ve benefited from that kind of upbringing. thinking about how the way dalish mages are trained could be something for people to learn from, after the circles are dissolved.

BANTERS LIKE THE ONES IN DAI BETWEEN DORIAN AND SOLAS. because merrill is a fucking scholar (LOVE her approach to the ruins in dao) and anders thinking he knows so much about how to cast magic and merrill knowing better. LMAO follow-up banters where merrill is like :) i noticed you casting that spell differently today :) and anders aggravatedly being like YES ok you were right it DOES conserve more mana to cast it that way and merrill being like :^)

MERRILL KNOWS HER SHIT. anders has got rigid circle training and whatever training (if any) the wardens gave him. INTELLECTUAL EXCHANGE. something something anders respecting merrill as a formidable mage who KNOWS WHAT SHE’S DOING even if he doesn’t always necessarily AGREE with what she’s doing, he can at least respect that she knows her shit

romanced merrill stealing anders’ book for sex magic. i know that one is canon but i wish anders had been more amused and obliging about it. isabela going “OOOOOH you could show her the electricity thing” and anders being like “HMMMM i could. and maybe the fire thing too.” and isabela going “you never showed ME the fire thing :(” also anders going like “ooooh do you do that magic vine stuff?? i knew a dalish elf who did it and i really did have some.... ideas...” and merrill going “oh yes, love doing that” (listen. merrill is not like. innocent. she just doesn’t understand human culture. she’s absolutely kinky in bed, no one who isn’t would go through anders’ grimoire, specifically to look for sex magic spells. sorry not sorry about it). 

OK HEAR ME OUT. ANDERS AND MERRILL ARE ABSOLUTELY COPARENTING SOME OF THOSE STRAY KITTENS IN LOWTOWN. NO. I WILL NOT BE TAKING QUESTIONS.

if taken on mirror image, anders asking whether she really thinks its worth it to talk to this demon for the mirror and merrill saying yes and anders sighing, obviously thinking it’s a bad idea, but going well alright i’ll back you up, i know you know more about this stuff than i do

anders calling marethari an idiot for not having faith in merrill :^)

OK ALSO MERRILL SHOULD NOT HAVE FALLEN FOR THE DEMON IN FEYNRIEL’S QUEST. THIS ISN’T EVEN ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP, IT’S JUST BULLSHIT THAT THEY HAD HER GIVING INTO PRIDE. GET FUCKED, MERRILL KNOWS WHAT’S SHE’S DOING

i think a lot of these are anders-centric bc bias and i feel like merrill IS v sweet to him anyway (UNDESERVINGLY! he’s so fucking mean to her, most of the party members are) but my adhd brain is so fucking scattered rn and i can’t think beyond this so PLSSSS add more if you want to !!!!

#dragon age #da2 #anders #merrill #their friendship could be LEGENDARY actually #back on my da2 BS.... i wanna replay #vee.txt #edit: some of tht opening paragraph was repetitive af sorry its the adhd #vee rewrites da

[separatist-apologist]

Are You Ready For It

In the middle of the night, in my dreams, you should see the things we do

Summary: When Elain Archeron's roommate can't interview wealthy business man and school alumni Lucien Vanserra, Elain agrees to step in.

Little does she know what Mr. Vanserra does behind closed doors.

Or what he'd do to her, if she'd only agree to let him.

NOTE: Since this is a 50 shades of grey re-write, there is absolutely BDSM inside. It has been re-written to include an incredibly amount of consent/discussion/enthusiastic participation. However, if BDSM isn't your thing, it's just not your thing. No shame in the game. There is also some light DV but that occurs from a villain and not between the main LI's, but it will be included in the tags on AO3. Please use discretion when reading.

Also I've never read 50 sog so my knowledge is based on what I've heard. This is more like 50 shades of orange

written for @queenofsilverfire and @sjmkinkmeme

beta'd by the incomparable @the-lonelybarricade

Chapter 1: Some boys are trying too hard

Read more: AO3 | 15k words

Autumn in Velaris was Elain Archeron’s favorite time of year. In between the start of the semester madness of a new year and finals, October was a personal sweet spot for the college senior. Elain was looking forward to the future, one that saw her on her own for the first time in her life. Her roommate, Arina, would be moving out of their little shoebox apartment to live with her boyfriend Jack and Elain intended to take over the rent full-time. She’d been working more hours for a florist, squirreling away everything as best she could in order to ensure she’d have enough to live on.

It was a small life but it was hers. 

Elain biked from campus to her apartment, a mere seven blocks from the ancient, storied halls of Velaris U. The majority of the people living in the four story walk-up where also students which meant at any given time Elain could hear fucking, fucking, and partying through the paperthin walls. Rent was cheap and the neighborhood nice enough though the trade-off was the landlord was not interested in doing any maintenance at all. The gray hallway carpet must have been two decades old and the paint was peeling from every wall. Inside the apartment, Elain ignored the creeping black on the shower tile, scrubbing it away only for it to return with the humidity every spring.

Housing was expensive and Elain, like Arina, was poor. Splitting rent meant they always had money for cute shoes and clothes and, when the mood struck them, a drink at the bar. Elain stepped inside to find Arina sliding on a tall pair of heels. She was a cocktail waitress at a local sports bar that exclusively hired hot, tall co-eds. Elain had been offered a job more times than she could count and chose to see it as a flattering thing, though Arina’s shorts were basically cheeky underwear with sheer black tights beneath and the top was an actual sports bra.

“Do me a favor tomorrow,” Arina began by way of greeting.

“Missed you too,” Elain replied, setting her keys on the dingy kitchen countertop. Arina winced, pulling her thick, blonde hair up in a high ponytail.

“I’m supposed to be interviewing some hot shot CEO type for the school paper tomorrow. He's a former alum and this is a huge favor. I can’t make it, Jack—” Elain groaned at the sound of Jack’s name, plopping onto the thrifted seafoam green couch. “C’mon. Don’t be shitty about Jack.”

“And Jack? Is he allowed to be shitty?” Elain replied. Jack, who was so far beneath Arina as a dropout, wanna be streamer with a paltry following of two hundred. Elain had more instagram likes on a photo of the sunset than Jack had views on every bad video he’d ever made. He didn’t work, mooched off Arina for everything, and still had the audacity to treat her like she ought to be grateful to have him.

Elain didn’t get it. Jack was mediocre at best and Arina could have modeled if she wanted. Men routinely stopped her on the street to ask for her number and had literal celebrities in her DM’s on instagram. Jack was pale and skinny, unwashed and foul-mouthed. He’d never liked Elain and the only saving grace had always been that Elain wasn’t willing to abandon Arina like Jack wanted. For four years, Elain had been Arina’s roommate.

She would have continued, but Jack was dangling the promise of marriage over Arina’s head in exchange for her moving in full time. Elain understood it—Arina would spend the rest of her life financing his life while he played video games all day. Jack lacked all of Arina’s ambition and drive. 

Arina didn’t respond to Elain’s question, turning plaintive green eyes on her friend. “Will you for me? Thrity minutes if that. I’m sure he’s way too busy. I emailed him all my questions this morning so all you have to do is repeat them for him, record his answers, and thank him for his time. Please?”

Arina, head of the school paper, wanted to be a journalist someday. Elain sighed.

“I guess I can give some billionaire the ‘ol razzle dazzle. What’s his name?”

“Lucien Vanserra. He’s got some fancy tech company.”

“Vanserra? Like the Senator?” she questioned. Arina nodded with big eyes.

“Yeah. His oldest brother is the state’s senator in D.C. So he’s well connected. Just give him some doe eyes—yes, just like that—ask your questions and you’re free for the rest of the day.”

“Fine,” Elain agreed. “But you know I lack all your charm, so don’t be surprised when he writes a very angry e-mail.”

Arina rolled her eyes, well aware that when men found charming about her laid between her legs. “Thanks for this. Gray called, by the way. If you want to call him back.”

Arina still had a landline, complete with an actual voicemail. She thought it was charming though Elain found nothing charming about the shrill ring of ruby red phone at seven in the morning. Gray was her very recent ex and not by her design. He’d ended things, saying he wanted to meet new people in the last year of their relationship.

And Elain was still miserable over it. He wanted to be friends but Elain wanted to be in love. She’d blocked him so he’d stop sending her memes because it made her too hopeful he had changed his mind. She knew he hadn’t—she’d heard he’d slept with some girl in a sorority that same night. He merely wanted to keep her on the backburner and Elain needed to patch up her battered, bruised heart. 

“Thanks,” Elain murmured, suddenly guilty she’d been so harsh about Jack. Arina only nodded.

“Don’t wait up. My shift doesn’t end until one am but I can never kick those shitheads out until three.”

Elain nodded, watching as Arina grabbed her giant white purse and marched out. Arina made twice as much money as Elain did on one shift, though the trade was men constantly tried to touch her breasts. Elain didn’t envy her that.

She spent the evening working on homework and watching television when she could take staring at her screen for a moment longer. She wanted to stay awake for Arina and was forced to give up early in the morning for bed. 

Elain woke in the middle of the night to Arina’s giggling voice and a man—Jack— stumbling their way through the apartment. Elain reached in the dark for a shoe laying on the floor and threw it at the wall.

“SHUT UP!” she yelled, earning exaggerating whispering and a distinctly deep, masculine voice that did not belong to Jack.

“You have a roommate?”

Elain dug out ear plugs just in time for the moaning to start. Grabbing her phone on the side table, she noted the time was three thirty. Elain wasn’t about to condemn Arina for a one-night stand even if she did have a boyfriend. Maybe this was the first step in convincing Arina to leave him. 

Still, Elain woke bleary eyed at seven am to shower and do her hair ahead of the ten am meeting with the tech CEO. Lucien Vanserra. It was the sort of name that belonged to some snooty fifty something named by some bored heiress who wanted her son to sound more european. 

Elain curled her waist length, golden blonde hair carefully, letting it tumble down her back before she spent an hour carefully applying make-up so it seemed as if she wore none at all. She knew those types—something about the name Lucien made her think he was the sort of man that liked natural looking women, when there was nothing natural about her carefully lined pink lips. 

Dressed in a green and blue plaid dress and nice brown heels, Elain grabbed Arina’s list of questions from the counter, a sensible purse, made her way out of the apartment. 

As Elain was walking down, Jack was trudging up. Blue eyes swept over her, a sneer curling over his lips. He always looked at her like that, like she was the most disgusting filth he’d ever seen though Elain had it on good authority she looked quite pretty.

“Arina’s not in,” Elain told him by way of greeting. “Early morning meeting with her advisor.”

“She didn’t tell me that,” he snapped. Elain only shrugged.

“Maybe she’s ending things. Fingers crossed.”

“Bitch,” he hissed, shoulder checking her as she jogged down the steps. It had hurt her feelings once, the way he so casually called her that. Now, though, it was nothing to her. Every woman who disagreed with him was a bitch.

And Arina had brought home a man that wasn’t Jack. For whatever reason, Arina had abandoned her deeply held loyalty and Elain would cover for her. Jack was just behind her, shoving her at the bottom of the landing with the flat of his hand. Elain slammed into the glass door as a result, wincing from the force.

“Clumsy bitch,” he grumbled, slamming the door in her face and kicking her bike as he passed. As if it were her fault he wasn’t getting his filthy dick wet at nine in the morning. Elain was pissed by the time she got on the road, made worse by shitty drivers in big cars that seemed to have a personal problem with cyclists. She caught sight of her face in the mirrored window of the Vanserra building, noting the purpling bruise along her cheekbone. Fucking Jack. 

She pushed it out of her mind for the moment. Get through this interview and then she’d call Arina and rant. Elain took a breath and plastered a smile on her face. Thirty minutes. 

The lobby was sleek and clean, all tinted glass windows and shiny, slippery floors. There was a coffee stand opposite the elevators and huge, potted trees to offer color to the otherwise very corporate lobby. She walked to the front desk where a pretty blonde in a headset stared at her phone.

“Lucien Vanserra?” she asked when blue eyes flicked to her face. The woman clacked long nails on her keys.

“Arina?”

“Yep,” Elain lied, flashing Arina’s student ID so quickly the girl couldn’t get a read on it. Not that she cared—that receptionist could not have been more bored if she tried.

“I’ll let him know you’re on your way up. Twenty fourth floor.”

“Great,” Elain replied, though it wasn’t great at all. She joined the crowd of nice suits and skirts all huddled around the six doors that would take her upwards, glancing at the mirror between two of the elevators. She would have been flawless had it not been for that bruise. It wouldn’t matter—she doubted he’d notice. It was merely a stain to her vanity and a reminder that Jack was the worst man she’d ever met. 

Vanserra’s floor was just as sleek and just as clinical. Laminate wood broke up the heavy, shiny tile from the lobby though the effect was hardly better. Another blonde at another mahogany desk was waiting with the same annoyed expression. “You’re early,” the girl told her. 

Elain glanced at her phone. Early by two whole minutes. 

“Sorry,” she replied, her voice betraying just how not sorry she was. Elain took a seat on a nice elegant couch, practically sinking into the middle. She had to cross her legs not to look ridiculous or risk showing anywhere the underwear beneath her dress. While she waited, she pulled out her phone.

Sorry about last night.

Thanks for not telling Jack. 

I don’t know what got into me.

Let me know how the interview goes. I don’t think I’m going to see him tonight.

Are you mad?

Elain typed out a quick of course I’m not, I’ll see you soon just as the blonde answered a shrill, ringing phone. Her eyes slid to Elain before she murmured agreement.

“Mr. Vanserra will see you now.”

Why did she make that sound so ominous? Elain gingerly rose to her feet, ignoring the irritated receptionist and her clicking teeth. Was it a requirement to work for the Vanserras that a person have the worst attitude known to man? Elain followed the girl, dressed in a nice pencil skirt and tucked in white top, through an open desk space where people milled about, working and talking and generally going about their day. It seemed casual enough despite the heels on the girl in front of her. Elain caught jeans and legging on more than one person. The whole back wall was a long window overlooking the city, allowing sunlight to pour directly into the room.

She knew the corner office belonged to Vanserra before the door was ever pulled open. Tinted glass made it impossible to see in, though she was willing to bet he could see everything. King of his domain, ever the micromanager. The blonde rapped sharply on the glass, her sour mood melting into breathless fascination.

“Mr. Vanserra? Your ten o'clock is here.”

The tall, leather backed chair swiveled to look at Elain understood what had turned the angry receptionist into a purring kitten. She blinked at the man staring back at her, his shoulder length, auburn hair loose around his chiseled, golden brown face. Russet eyes peered at her with clinical interest and Elain wondered how he’d gotten the trio of scars etched through his otherwise immaculately thick brows. A full mouth turned upwards in a polite smile and when he stood she found that he was tall, well over six foot, and muscular despite the suit that hid his frame.

“Thanks, Beth.”

“Of course. If you need anything,” she added, drawing a bewildered look from Elain. It was so openly suggestive that Elain couldn’t help her open mouth surprise. Was that how he ran his business? 

He didn’t react. “Of course.”

And that was that. Lucien gestured for her to sit across his desk in another large chair, this one with a seat firm enough she didn’t sink to her neck. Elain’s eyes glanced over the shelves of books and the table of neatly organized awards and diplomas.

“So. Arina Novak–”

“Elain Archeron,” she interrupted quickly. “Arina is my roommate. She was…sick…so I’m filling in.”

Why did he look so amused? He steepled his fingers in front of his lips. “Another journalist?”

“Botany,” she replied quickly. His smile faded for a moment and Elain knew what he thought. Young—likely no older than thirty—and rich, he’d imagined her coming to meet him. Elain reached into her purse for her questions while he reclined in his chair.

“What do you do with a botany degree?”

She shrugged. It was a question her older sister asked constantly. “Starve, I suppose. So, for my first questi—”

“What do you mean, starve?”

Elain looked back up at him, unnerved by his interest. “My sister always says I should have done something useful. It’s just a bad joke. I like making floral arrangements and event planning. Stuff like that.”

“Ah. Event planning for a wedding?”

Elain blinked. He was staring at her with such intensity that his words sounded sultry, like he was asking if she wanted to get married. Heart racing, Elain nodded. “Maybe.”

“My mother is remarrying. Maybe I’ll give her your number.”

“You don’t have it,” Elain said without thinking. A cheshire's smile spread over his impossibly handsome face.

“Easily rectified, I would imagine.”

She looked back at her questions. “Did you always know you wanted to–”

“This is the part where I say this was my dream, right? That I’m so fortunate to do what I love and I could never have done it without the education from Velaris U?”

“Is that true?”

He shrugged his broad shoulders. “Maybe I’m just good at conning investors out of money.”

“Spoken like a true nepo baby,” she said quickly without thinking. Lucien’s eyes went wide and too quick, Elain realized she’d crossed a line.

“I—”

He threw his head back and laughed, the sound dark and rich like honey dripping over chocolate. “That certainly didn’t hurt,” Lucien agreed, eyes sparkling. “Who taught you how to interview?”

“No one,” she breathed, so utterly embarrassed she could have died from it. “I’m sorry.”

He waved a hand, revealing a well defined vein just beneath the skin and a watch that made his fingers seem longer, the whole thing seem bigger.

She looked away. “I ah…do you think your education was helpful?”

“Of course,” he agreed as Elain quickly scribbled his words down. “Don’t worry about transcribing. I’ll follow up with your friend so she can quote me directly. I don’t trust you not to remind everyone I am not the self-made man the media makes me out to be.”

“Oh. Then I’ll get out of you–”

“Stay,” he said with easy authority, the sort that kept her rooted in spot. “We still have twenty-five minutes.”

“I’m sure you’re a busy man,” Elain insisted, though she didn’t move at all. Lucien watched her appraisingly, waiting. 

“Not too busy for a current student at my alma mater. And if you leave, someone else will come in to talk to me. So really you’re doing me a favor.”

Elain very much doubted that. Crossing her legs, Elain couldn’t help but ask, “Why did you decide to do all this?”

His eyes glazed over, wholly focused on her knee. She didn’t dare move, certain he was just thinking though it felt as if he could see what was beneath her dress. He cleared his vision and exhaled a breath.

“I’m good at it,” he finally told her. “And sometimes you’ve got to lean into your strengths, right? I was never going to be an artist.”

“Is that a hobby of yours?”

She wished she hadn’t asked. His eyes went dark for a moment, that sultry smile back. “Not quite.”

Elain didn’t quite appreciate the sensual tone of his words or the way he was looking at her like she was a meal. What would he have done if it were Arina who walked into his office? Suddenly the blonde receptionist and her flirty words made more sense. He was sleeping with his subordinates.

How utterly cliched. 

“Well,” she began awkwardly.

“Sit down, Ms. Archeron.” her murmured and Elain immediately plopped back down before her brain caught up with her actions. Something about him exuded authority. Maybe it was the suit draped perfectly against his long, muscular body. Maybe it was the confidence in which he carried himself.

Maybe she just needed to get laid and any man looking at her the way he was would have been enough to make her obey. Elain didn’t want to examine that too quickly. Lucien cocked his head for a moment.

Studying her.

“What’s your plan after you graduate? Do you have a job lined up?”

“Why? Are you offering me one?” she replied, thinking of his receptionist. He was so utterly transparent, so completely absurd—

Lucien laughed again. “Oh, I don’t think you’d enjoy working here for a moment. Alumni help students find jobs all the time. Why should I be any different? I’ve been thinking on how I could support the school—”

“Maybe a scholarship,” she said quickly, noting how his smile never shifted. “Since you’re so fortunate to have so much.”

“Do you have experience in such things?”

She shrugged. “Do I need to in order to care about people less fortunate than me?”

“Touche, okay. I hear you. You find me spoiled and arrogant, then?”

Yes. A flush crept up her cheeks. She was messing this all up. “No, I…”

“It’s alright,” he all but purred, leaning forward, elbows on his desk. “Honesty is better than ass-kissing, right?”

“I suppose,” she agreed, shifting nervously in her chair. 

Pushing his luck, Lucien said, “Why don’t you give me your email and I’ll introduce you to someone I know in event planning?”

He slid an orange sticky pad and a rather nice pen Elain’s fingers itched to steal towards her. She scribbled the email quickly, wondering if this was going to come back to haunt her. It would be nice to get some help. Her advisor was utterly useless, uninterested in Elain’s future career and she lacked connections that other students had. Everyone else was lining up jobs so effortlessly and Elain was floundering in her interviews. If this man wanted to help her, Elain decided she’d let him. It didn’t mean she owed him anything—in fact, Elain very decidedly would not repay him with anything he needed. He’d get a thank you like anyone else. 

He glanced at his watch, frowning at whatever he saw. It was just enough time for her to jump out of her chair before he could boss her into sitting back down. 

“Well…this was…” this was what? A waste of her time? The new highlight of her erotic daydreams? “Thank you for your time, Mr. Vanserra,” she decided lamely. He rose and oh God she wished he hadn’t. He was like a dream, something from a fantasy and not real life. Men like him, with perfect bodies and perfect faces and the good sense to know exactly what cologne to wear, had no business walking around in real life. He offered her a broad hand and Elain accepted. His skin was warm, his grip firm.

“The pleasure was all mine. I’ll walk you out?”

And though he technically asked a question, he spoke it like a command. Elain didn’t bother to respond, merely nodding her head. She was oddly conflicted—he was so bossy it was irksome and so handsome she was willing to overlook it. That was a dangerous combination. 

Though ultimately, it didn’t matter. Lucien pressed the button that would take her back to the lobby and then made his way to the reception desk where his breathless secretary tracked his every move. She leaned forward, breasts all but spilling from her top and Elain was forgotten. 

She tried to pretend it didn’t disappoint her a little. He was merely a man very good at making people feel seen and special. That was his charm. She’d read too much into the interaction and now she felt stupid.

Still, Elain reflected on the meeting in her mind over and over, barely aware of the world around her as she biked home. Elain flung open the door to her apartment to find Arina on the couch, dressed in yoga pants and a slouchy shirt. She was frowning at her laptop screen and for a horrible moment, Elain was sure Lucien Vanserra had complained about her.

“How did it go?” Arina asked, brushing wisps of hair off her face. 

“What did he say?” Elain asked too defensively, dropping her bag loudly on the counter.

Arina didn’t smile. “That you were utterly charming and to let him know if we need anything else. Filled out all our questions. In and out, just like I said. Was he nice?”

And it wasn’t worth telling Arina the utter fantasy she’d let herself imagine. That a man like Lucien Vanserra, a person likely surrounded by a parade of beautiful, available women, was interested in college student studying botany.

“Yeah. Totally normal.”

“Good.” She snapped her laptop lid shut. “I need you to do something else with me.”

“With you? Or for you?” Elain sat beside her friend.

“With me. I ah…last night,” Arina took a breath, steeling herself. “I fucked up last night and if Jack finds out…”

“Fuck Jack,” Elain said automatically, though she omitted what Jack had done that morning. She could never bring herself to tell Arina the true scope of how awful he was. 

“A man came in and he was so charming and he was in this suit…he smelled good and he wasn’t being disgusting…I don’t know what happened, Elain. I swear, it was like…it was like someone else took over my body. I just wanted to be that girl, you know? The one that an attractive man wants.”

Elain’s mouth fell open because Arina was that girl to everyone but Jack. 

“He seems to think something is going to come of that night and I just…there’s this party this weekend and he invited me. Come with me. I’m going to tell him nothing can happen but I don’t want to go alone.”

“Why not just text him?”

Arina looked down miserably at her phone. “I don’t have his number. I’m afraid he’ll just show up and it’ll cause a huge scene. Please? Just one night. It’ll have free food and drinks–”

“Of course I’ll go,” Elain said easily. “If only for free drinks.”

Arina put her head on Elain’s shoulder. 

“You’re the best.”

LUCIEN:

Lucien reclined in his office chair, manilla envelope in hand, courtesy of his friend and partner, Jurian. Slicing it open with his finger, he pulled out the documents inside. 

Elain Archeron.

The very first sheet was merely a picture of a younger version of her–likely eighteen, likely taken on her first week on campus given it was her student ID. Jurian didn’t have much in the way of information. Elain was so clean she didn’t even have a traffic ticket. He’d watched her leave from his office on a cute little green bike, replete with a bell and basket. 

Jurian had dug up some things she’d written in the paper for her friend Arina—all on plant care—a few pictures of her that had been added to the paper, and then her former addresses. She’d grown up in the midwest which checked out to Lucien. She had that sort of sweet, down-to-earth persona that was refreshing to someone like him.

He hadn’t been able to get her out of his mind since he’d last seen her. Just a day and yet when he’d gotten home he’d had to take his aching cock in his hand and pump one out just to get through the night. Lucien couldn’t recall ever being so affected to the mere presence of a woman. Not like that.

It was her eyes, wet and brown and wide like a baby deer. She radiated innocence and he wanted to put his filthy hands all over her and ruin her. He would have bet everything he owned on Elain being a wild, bratty little thing in the right circumstances. Lucien set the paperwork back to his desk, turning his eyes back to her email. He wanted to talk to her and had no excuse to do so. He’d lied about the contact—he’d have to find one, first, if he wanted to make that introduction. He’d merely sensed she wouldn’t hand over her phone number without a reason. Lucien remembered being a college senior and how stressed everyone had been about finding a job. She was no different. 

Of course he wanted to help…only his help really was centered around her naked body and his cock. She didn’t know that. Not yet anyway. He hoped she might, if he could figure out the right way to approach her that made him seem alluring and sexy and not like a fucking loser. It was a fine line and he knew it. 

His door banged open and Beth stepped in, blue eyes bouncing between his moron brother and him. Beth was so obnoxiously obvious with her hot for teacher eyes that Lucien was extra careful with how he spoke to her. He knew if he or Eris ordered her to her knees, she’d have done it without a second thought.

Maybe that was what drew him towards Elain. Nepo-baby. Fuck she was funny and more importantly, she wasn’t impressed with him at all. When was the last time he’d fucked someone that wasn’t hoping for an accidental pregnancy or that her pussy was the one that would make him fall in love? He just wanted to know what it would be like.

That’s all it was. 

“How young is too young?” Eris asked by way of greeting, before Beth had even shut the door. Lucien suppressed an eye roll at her obvious interest. Lucien waited for her to close the door before answering.

“If you’re asking, you already know.”

“I fucked a twenty two year old the other night. Jesus, though…if you saw her body–”

“It’s like you want a scandal,” Lucien reminded Eris patiently. “She’s going to rat you out–”

“She didn’t know who I was,” Eris breathed, pacing Lucien’s office to mess with all his things. Eris and his nervous, political energy and his utter control…except when it came to his dick. “I want to lock her up in my house.”

“Yeah, I’m sure the press would love that. Cut her loose—”

“She’s coming to the gala tonight. Come with me. I want you to see her.”

“I don’t need to see her. She’s too young.”

“There’s free alcohol,” Eris said, switching tactics. “And Jess will be there–”

“I don’t want to see Jess,” Lucien grumbled. What a stupid, old crush that had been. She’d broken his heart more times than he could count and still he always came back for more when she got bored or lonely or nostalgic. It had been two years without Jess. Lucien didn’t want to reopen that door. 

“Free alcohol then. C’mon. She’s bringing a friend,” Eris added. Lucien scowled.

“I’m not interested in fucking some twenty-two year old co-ed.”

“Jesus Lucien, what’s your problem?”

“I’ll go,” he grumbled. “What’s her name, at least? Have Jurian poke around before you start making declarations of marriage.”

Eris dropped into one of the leather chairs, crossing an ankle over his knee. “Arina Novak. God, Lucien, she could model, you should see….”

Eris’s voice trailed off in his head. Arina Novak. Elain Archeron’s roommate. What were the odds his brother slept with her the night before Elain came in her friend's stead. His whole body tightened at the thought of seeing her again, somewhere outside of work where he could be looser, where a little alcohol might lower her guard just enough to appreciate what he had to offer. 

If he let Eris know he had any interest, his brother would pounce. “Fine. But I don’t think a twenty two year old is a good politician's wife.”

“She’s got a face for television,” Eris disagreed, clearly pleased his brother agreed. “And a body for porn. You’ll see.”

And that was that. Eris left Lucien with that little piece of knowledge when he still had hours left of his workday. He got shit done, his mind constantly wandering back to Elain in her tight, flared dress that showed nothing more than her knees and buttoned practically to her neck. Her cascade of loose curls that fell down her back in golden brown waves and her fucking full lips, the sort he could not stop imagining wrapped around his cock while her arms were tied behind her back. Lucien wanted to see her on her knees so bad it made him sick.

He went home and fucked his hand twice before he ever made it into the shower. It helped, if only a little and by the time he was dressed in a white button up tucked into belted black slacks, a jacket thrown on overtop, Lucien felt sane again. Like a man firmly in control and not ruled by his stupid, needy penis. 

He left his hair around his face before heading out, checking his phone every eight seconds as if she’d text. Not yet. But tonight, he vowed. Tonight he’d work her into dinner, would lay the groundwork to getting her into his apartment…into his ropes. 

He was early as he rolled up to the hotel Eris was holding his little fundraiser in. Gala, as if this were a charity. Lucien jogged up the steps to the swinging glass door and made his way through the wide, open interior of the lobby. It was an old hotel made from marble and glass and crystal, back when craftsmanship and style were more important than towering, sleek skylines. He could appreciate the former—he loathed the latter. 

The ballroom had been transformed into something straight out of the roaring twenties, save for all the people in modern clothing. A massive chandelier poured soft light across white and black swirled marble floors. A long bar at the far end of the room was serving pre-selected cocktails along with the obvious beers, of course. Waiters in coats and tails walked about with trays of food they offered to people sitting at round tables draped in lacy white. A dance floor was cordoned off and though there was a DJ, the music could have come from a small quartet of violins. All very tasteful for Eris’s chosen crowd and the perfect, ambient setting for Lucien’s slow seduction.

All of which was interrupted by his mother. Swanning over in a pretty blue dress, she grinned when she saw him. “Lucien,” she breathed, kissing his cheek. He was sure she’d left a pink stain on his skin. “I was starting to think I’d never see you again.”

“You know how work is,” he replied, though in truth Lucien couldn’t stand that old house. Beron, his father, might be dead but his ghost lingered. No amount of her engagement to Helion could alter that. 

“Mmm,” she agreed noncommittally. “You know, Jess is here.”

Lucien saw her the moment his mother said her name. Jess, with her straight, dark hair and her wide, coal colored eyes. She had glossy lips and her tits pushed up to her neck. An hourglass body taunted him, reminding her of all the nights he’d had her trussed up, that mouth gagging around him.

The thought used to make him ache. Their eyes met and Lucien was surprised he hadn’t had a visceral response. He merely inclined his head before turning his attention to the rest of the room. 

“Jess is over,” he told his mother without hesitation. 

“Well, let me introduce you to…”

Everything melted when his head turned towards those open doors and Elain Archeron stepped in. She wore a tight red dress and matching red lipstick. Her sultry eyes were all made up so they seemed wider and darker than before and her hair—fuck, her perfect waterfall of curls—hung loose around her face. The barest hint of breast peeked over the top of the nightmare she was currently clad in, the hem cutting against her slim upper thighs. Lucien’s whole body was tight again, his cock stirring in his pants.

She’d come just as he’d hoped he might. Beside her was Eris’s tall blonde—gorgeous, to be certain and yet Lucien was immensely grateful his brother had kept Arina from coming to her interview. 

Elain’s eyes swept over the room, snagging on him quickly. He couldn’t help his slow smile creeping over his face and was stupidly pleased when her face flushed. She wasn’t immune either, then. 

“Another time, mother,” he assured her, stepping away without waiting to hear her protesting words. Eris beat him to the girls, walking them towards the bar like an utter bastard. Elain glanced over her shoulder, looking away when she realized he was coming towards her. What was she thinking, he wondered? 

“This is my brother, Lucien,” Eris said with a practiced smile. Lucien extended his hand to Arina first.

“We almost met, once,” he replied. “Nice to meet you for real.”

“Thank you for talking with us,” Arina agreed, her golden face pale and nervous. Lucien could see the writing on the wall, even if Eris could not. She hadn’t come to fall into his arms. She’d come to tell him to knock it off. Elain looked at her friend with expectant eyes. 

“We’ve met,” was all Elain said, her tone very much saying do what you came to do.

“Can we talk for a second?” Arina all but whispered to cool, confident Eris. Elain squeezed her friends wrist before she left, turning her attention to him.

Finally.

“We meet again,” he said, gesturing to the bar they were leaning against. “Want a drink?”

“With you?” she asked, her voice breathless. Fuck. He wanted to hear her breathless in his bedroom. 

“Who else?”

And Elain, with her unbridled audacity, looked around the room. Lucien knew, in that moment she was no mere submissive thing but a brat who would need a firm hand. The realization made his cock ache against the soft fabric of his briefs and when she wasn’t looking, hips angled towards the wood of the bar, he rubbed the heel of his hand against himself to adjust. No need to let her know she had any affect on him at all.

Breathe, you dumb motherfucker.

She frowned, eyes snagging on someone Lucien vaguely recognized. The senior Nolan had stepped in with his blonde wife and their reedy looking son. “Him?” he asked, not bothering to hide how indignant the thought made him.

“What? No,” she breathed, looking back ut Lucien with those fuck me eyes. “I just…I know him.”

“How?”

“We dated,” she replied, eyes pinching for a moment. Lucien turned to study the man—boy, really. He was handsome enough in an obvious, eighties movie villain sort of way. Lucien didn’t know the Nolan’s well enough to comment on what it must have been like, though just by looking at Graysen’s weak chin, Lucien knew he absolutely did not eat pussy.

Elain, he bet, could use it. Lucien could too. He was distracted by the thought, of her riding his face, panting in that soft, breathless sort of way. Lucien could make her loud, could draw her out, could torture her for hours, keep her on that edge.

Fuck, how he wanted to. 

“Sounds fascinating,” he replied dryly, ordering a neat whiskey while she continued to stare. Elain jerked when she realized he had moved on, her whole face impossibly tight…and bruised. When had that happened? While she ordered a vodka tonic, Lucien brushed his knuckle over her cheekbone. 

“What happened here?” he asked, noting she’d clearly tried to hide it with her hair and a thin layer of carefully applied make-up. He turned his head to look at Nolan, wondering if he needed to take him out back and beat the shit out of him. 

Elain’s eyes widened, her fingers swatting him away. “I fell.”

Lucien stared for a moment, letting her see how little he believed her. “Face first?”

“I…can be clumsy,” his pretty little liar assured him. 

Lucien reached between them for her hands. He’d spent enough time around his mother, perpetually covered in those same bruises, to know that people who fell threw out their hands to catch themselves and people who were shoved violently or hit unexpectedly had soft, unblemished palms…just like Elain. She yanked it back.

“It wasn’t him,” she breathed when Lucien rose to his full height. “Just some douchebag in my apartment building. No big deal.”

“No…big…deal…” Lucien repeated with glassy eyes, thinking of his own mother and how often she’d breathed those same words. “If you say so.”

“What are you doing here?” she asked, shifting on her feet to look at the clear, bubbling liquid in her hand. Changing the subject to shift his attention, but Lucien was single-minded. He’d find that dumbfuck and he’d show them what happened when someone bigger, someone stronger, pushed them around. He did not believe it wasn’t personal or even the first time. 

“My brother,” he nodded towards the pillar Eris was reclined against, talking to his too-young blonde. “Man of the hour, as always.”

“Does that bother you?”

He grinned. “No one cares if I stand here talking to you, so nope.”

Another flush crept up her neck. “Thank you again, for meeting with me. I know it meant a lot to Arina.”

“Sure,” he agreed, not caring one bit if he did Arina any favors. He wanted to know if she had enjoyed it. No way to ask without being a creep, so instead, Lucien added, “You should let me buy you dinner. Tomorrow.”

Her eyes were so big, her pretty, red lips parted. He had fight the urge to rub his thumb over her mouth, to smear it around her face. He wanted to see that lipstick stained against his cock and fuck, Lucien had to turn and face the bar completely to keep people from seeing the obvious bulge in his pants. 

“Dinner? For what?” she asked, the sweet little thing. 

“A date,” Lucien replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world—because it was. “I’ll pick you up…eight o’ clock?”

“A date?” Was it really so unbelievable to her he found her attractive? Surely that wasn’t new. Elain was easily the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen in his life. She outshone her friend and everyone else in the room without even trying. She had an effortless way about her and Lucien was willing to bet that when she wiped off all her make-up, she was just as cock-achingly stunning. 

“I uh…”

Lucien reached in his pocket for his phone, sliding it easily across the bar. She caught it on instinct. “Put your number in.” It wasn’t a request and Elain, without even realizing what he was doing, automatically picked it up and began doing what she was told. 

Good girl. 

She bit her bottom lip. Lucien resisted the urge to grab her by the chin and kiss her, forgetting where he was for a moment. 

“It’ll be fun,” he assured her. “No pressure.”

“I pay for myself,” she began, unaware of how much heat that filled him with.

“Absolutely not.”

Her fingers hesitated on the screen. “I don’t want to owe you—”

“You won’t,” he replied. He didn’t want her in his bed because she felt obligated over a decent meal. He wanted her in his bed because she was dizzy and sick with desire. “I pay for dates, though. You don’t owe me anything except your sharp wit.”

“As long as you understand I don’t have sex on the first date,” she told him firmly. Lucien almost demanded a list of men who hadn’t understood that. In time. 

“Very reasonable,” he agreed, not bothering to mention there would be a second date…and third…and on and on so long as the relationship between them remained mutually beneficial and fun. He’d explain it all tomorrow, he decided. What he wanted from her…what he wanted to give her. Start slow, start easy before working her into his personal playroom. 

Pleased to have her number, Lucien shot her a quick text so she had his phone number, too. “Feel free to text me anything you like,” he told her, letting some innuendo seep into his voice. She glanced up at him, eyes narrowing a fraction.

“You want memes?”

I want to see your pussy.

“I love memes,” he replied. “And conversation.”

“Noted,” Elain agreed, just in time for a red-faced Arina to stomp over, interrupting what was proving to be the highlight of his night.

“Can we talk?” she said, eyes cutting to Lucien with open suspicion. He merely waved the girls off, watching the sway of Elain’s hips as she went. She looked over her shoulder once, finding his unabashed staring.

I want you, doe-eyed fawn.

He’d have her.

ELAIN: 

Elain woke the next morning to a text from Lucien.

Good morning.

It wasn’t real. She didn’t know how to deal with some millionaire and his fascination. Had he really sent her a good morning text? She’d been so sure she’d imagined the whole thing, that she’d somehow stumbled into a hallucination that involved the absurdly hot Lucien Vanserra that Elain hadn’t even considered texting him, even when she left. She had immediately gone home to take a shower and perhaps alleviate some of the tension in her body beneath the pulsating water but she could hardly be blamed. After all, Lucien’s hands were so big and he smelled absurdly good.

He was going to realize that every time he spoke, all Elain was looking at was his mouth. She took a breath, inhaling strawberry and cinnamon scented air from the candle she’d been burning, mingled against the smell of burning, cheap weed.

Jack.

If Jack was around, the text was real. Elain was quick to respond good morning with a pink flower emoji before she stomped out of her bedroom in her sleep shorts and tanktop.

“Nice tits,” Jack said by way of greeting, staring at their television as he slammed around a controller in his hands. 

“Where is Arina?”

He shrugged. “She wasn’t here when I got here.”

“Then why are you here?” Elain demanded. “You don’t pay rent.”

“Bitchy as always, I see,” he replied. “Do you ever chill out?”

“Nope,” she replied. “Get out of my apartment.”

“Fuck you,” he retorted. “I’m waiting on my girlfriend and I have a key. Take your own bitchy advice, though, if it bothers you so much and go somewhere else.”

“She’s going to dump you one day,” Elain told him, practically vibrating with rage. “And you’re going to die alone.” He looked over at her with such obvious hatred that Elain yielded a step. “Arina’s not a dumb cunt like you. Heard Graysen was out again last night. Wonder why you can’t keep a man?’ 

“I’m going to tell her,” Elain whispered, the only card she had left to play. All at once, Jack exploded, flinging his controller against the wall so hard the drywall cracked. He rose to his feet, quick as a flash, to stand in her face.

“Tell her what? What a fucking nosy ass bitch you are? How you’re so fucking jealous that Arina has a man you try and sabotage it at every turn? Arina is going to figure out what a miserable, stupid bitch you are one of these days and cut you loose.”

“Maybe Arina will realize she could do better,” Elain whispered, her whole body shaking. 

“I hope you fucking die you stupid–”

“What’s going on in here?” Arina’s voice cut through Jack’s fury. Eyes wide and rimmed red, Elain didn’t have to ask if her friend had been crying. Elain took another step back and so did Jack, his fury smoothing into nothing.

“Just a friendly chat–”

“You said you hoped she died,” Arina pressed, clearly outraged. “Why would you say that?”

“Baby,” he tried but Arina held up a hand. Jack’s anger was back. “She’s fucking jealous–”

“Of what?!” Elain demanded. “All you do is sit here all day playing video games and smoking weed! You don’t work, you don’t help out! Why would I be jealous when you’re such a fucking loser!”

“See!” he tried but Arina was nodding her head.

“No…Jack…God she’s right. You’ve been saying for the last four years you’d get a job and you still haven’t–”

“My streaming—”

“Is never going to take off!” Arina interrupted, her anger burning hot. “I need help now, not for some hypothetical future!”

“I’m going to take care of you–” he tried, but Arina flung the door open behind her.

“Get out.”

“Arina–”

“GET. OUT!” she shrieked. He hesitated before ripping his system from their television so hard it nearly toppled over. 

“There’s someone else, isn’t there?” he asked when he had his things. “What’s his fucking name?”

“Common sense,” she whispered. “I should have done this last year.”

“I’ll fucking bet. I’ll find out, Reena and when I do…”

“You won’t do anything. That would require effort,” she snapped before shoving him into the hall.

“You’re a loose, ugly fucking bitch!” he screamed from the hall. “No one is gonna want you you fucking trailer park, daddy-issues cunt! Good fucking luck, Arina!”Arina didn’t react to his words, kicking her shoes off with a relieved exhale.

“You okay?” Arina looked at Elain, considering her words for a moment. “I think it took having a one-night stand with Eris Vanserra to realize how bad things were.”

“One night stand?”

“Yes,” Arina said firmly. “But it was a good night. He didn’t badger me one time and I know that’s like, a low bar but when I told him I didn’t want to do things from behind and he just agreed I had this moment of like, what am I even doing? You know? I feel bad I cheated on Jack but I needed to leave him. Eris gave me a reason, I guess.”

“And you don’t want to see him? He seemed interested,” Elain hedged carefully. Arina flopped onto the couch, nose wrinkling when she caught that stale weed smell.

“No. He’s in D.C. half the time and men like him never want anything serious. Even if he did, they don’t stay faithful. I see it all the time in the bar.”

“Lucien Vanserra asked me out. I won’t go if–”

“No, go,” Arina said, waving her hand. “Just be careful. He’s cut from the same cloth. He’ll always want more. Men like that know they can have whatever they want. Today it’s us, tomorrow it’s a different barely legal teenager. Have fun…let him take you somewhere nice, at least. Get a little jewelry out of it. Maybe a car.”

“Gosh, you make it sound too romantic,” Elain teased. 

Still, she was grateful Arina agreed and didn’t find it weird. The advice was a good reminder, too. Lucien was a grown man and so utterly unlike the other men on campus that he was practically in a different orbit. She couldn’t expect anything genuine or long-term for him. It was a first for Elain, who was so used to relationships that spanned years that maybe this was what she needed. Maybe she ought to take a page from Arina’s book and have a one night stand.

With that in mind, Elain put on the tightest black dress she owned, the one that just barely covered her ass and showed a generous amount of cleavage. She put a lacy pink thong on beneath and the matching bra, having shaved herself within an inch of her life. 

More tall, black shoes meant she won’t have to stand on tip-toes to reach his mouth and Elain took a chance and left her hair down hoping he liked that soft of thing. A sleek ponytail might have gone better, given she’d smoked out her eyeshadow and put red lipstick on again.

She strolled into the living room where Arina was still sitting, dressed down in sweatpants and an over-sized university t-shirt. 

“Jesus, Elain, why not take out a billboard that says you suck dick,” she said loudly, just in time for knocking on the door. 

“Want me to answer?” Arina teased. “Take pictures for prom?”

“Shut up.”

Elain pulled open the door where Lucien waited, eyeing the dingy, loud hall of her building with distaste. He was so ridiculously out of place she almost laughed. She wasn’t inviting him in, not when he looked so good in another well tailored set of black slacks and his shirt—blue, this time—was half hidden beneath a vest that hugged his muscular chest. He’d rolled his sleeves to his elbows and still had on the watch but it was his loose hair that made her felt wet between her legs.

Lucien couldn’t help himself, it seemed, his lips parting in a soft oh as he looked her up and down. “Ready?” 

If he was affected by her appearance, he didn’t let it show.

“Use protection!” Arina yelled just as Elain snapped the door shut. 

“No expectations?” Lucien tried to joke as she led him down the stairs. Elain watched him move, just a half-step in front of her. He was so tall, so broad…what was he like in bed? Was he the sort of man who relied on his good looks and didn’t think he ought to do any other work beyond that? Elain chose to believe Lucien lived up to the promises his big hands were currently making. 

“Don’t tell me you’re the sort that thinks clothes and consent are the same,” she replied, letting him jerk open the door. He looked down at her while she passed, his eyes so utterly dark she shivered.

“Your friend said to use protection,” he reminded her. “I just want to ensure I’m living up to your whispered expectations.”

Fuck he was so stupid and hot. “She’s just…”

Lucien’s smoldering look silenced the lie about to pour from her lips. Instead, Elain slid into the door he held open, reclining against the clean leather. His car smelled clean and masculine, like he’d just bought it that day and had sprayed himself quickly with a bit of his cologne. She wanted to bathe in that rich, spicy smell. 

Lucien jogged around the drivers side, folding his body behind the steering wheel. Elain forced herself to breathe, to act normal even though she couldn’t take her eyes off the muscle flexing in his forearm. Lucien cut a glanced towards, reaching for what she thought was her leg before he swerved and set it against the stick shift. 

“I don’t think you look like you suck dick,” he said after a moment and Elain, who had currently been imagining what it would be like to kneel between his legs, wanted to die. He’d heard that?

Lucien cleared his throat. “That came out wrong. You look nice.”

“Thanks,” she managed, just barely breathing. “You do, too.”

Lucien smiled ever so slightly, as if he knew he looked good. He’d be stupid not, she supposed, doubly so when they reached the restaurant and the hostesses eyes became wide like saucers at the sight of him. 

“Table for Vanserra?” His voice was smooth and dark and velvet, skittering up Elain’s spine before wrapping around her neck. 

“Right this way,” she breathed. Arina’s words rang through Elain’s head. What was it like to move through the world this way? To have people who always wanted you so viscerally? She imagined it was incredibly tempting and a good reminder that she could offer this man nothing but her physical presence no matter how fascinated by her words he seemed.

The interior of the restaurant was dim, with tables covered in thick white fabric and as far as Elain could tell, a pre-set menu. He was showing off, then.

Doubly, when she was taken to a rather intimate semi-circular table in the back. No chairs, only a long bench Elain slid onto and Lucien joined her on the other side until his leg was pressed against her own. She could barely think let alone speak which was just as well–Lucien ordered wine and other small plates for the table with practiced ease. 

He put one arm over the back of the book, drawing her closer against his chest and creating a bubble around them that made Elain’s whole body throb. He took a breath, brushing her hair off her shoulder. “Good day?”

“Yeah,” she breathed. “I uh…” She couldn’t remember one thing she’d done. Lucien chuckled.

“I feel the same way. You’ve been on my mind.”

She looked up at him and fuck, that was a huge mistake. He definitely caught the way her eyes zeroed in on his mouth, the way she tracked his tongue moistening his lips. “I have?”

Lucien cupped her face in his hand, the size of him enough to hold her neck, too. He brushed a thumb over her cheek, over the bruise she couldn’t quite manage to hide. “You made an impression, calling me an arrogant, spoiled nepotism baby.”

“I didn’t–I never—you–” she spluttered but Lucien dragged that same thumb over her lips, silencing her entirely. 

“Most people only want to talk about how wonderful I am.”

“I’m sure you have…good…qualities,” she replied, the pad of his finger still against her lips, salty from his skin. Lucien gripped her chin, tilting her closer.

“Mm, I suppose,” he agreed, lowering his face. He was going to kiss her. Elain felt electric, her skin humming with anticipation. 

Just like in the car, Lucien swerved at the last moment. “Wine?”

Elain’s whole brain went blank for a moment, trying to catch up with what was happening. Lucien reached for the uncorked bottle and poured two glasses of red. He offered it to her, watching as she took that first drink.

“Do you like it?”

No. Elain had never been much of a wine drinker. It tasted like wine—Elain had never been able to identify a difference between vintage and type. It was just wine flavored, sometimes sweeter and sometimes not. “It’s fine.”

“Do you prefer white?”

“I prefer vodka,” Elain told him honestly, a little annoyed he’d put his lovely mouth so close to hers only to pull away at the last second. “And a nice cider.”

That clearly surprised him. Good. Let him see that all the wining and dining wasn’t necessary. Elain would have been perfectly content at a greasy spoon. His money wasn’t what interested her, besides. It was his hands and how they’d feel running against her body. 

Not that Lucien didn’t try. He’d ordered on their behalf, watching her eat beautifully plated creations with a watchful eye. What did she enjoy? Did she enjoy the flavors, the textures, the presentations? No, no, no. In fact, every new thing was having the opposite intended effect. It reminded Elain she did not belong in this world, that she should never have agreed to go. What would likely have impressed a million other girls only served to make her feel inadequate. 

Elain had put a considerable amount of distance between them by the time the last plates were cleared away. She could see he was frustrated, unsure of what he was doing wrong. Elain bet this had worked a million times before. Instead of trying to escape, she ought to be crawling in his lap and calling him daddy. Some part of her still wanted to, of course. It wasn’t as if Lucien had stopped being hot. He was merely unattainable to her now—a fantasy better left in her head. 

Lucien paid while Elain checked her phone brazenly. It was universal speak for a bad date that would absolutely not be replicated, a shame given how wet the fabric of her thong still was. Lucien kept eyeing her, letting the silence drag.

She couldn’t help herself, so annoyed with him for his stupid date and all his money and good looks that Elain dug through her clutch, pulling out a mirror and her lipstick, repainting it against her lips while he watched her with dark, nearly rabid eyes. 

“Well,” she began, snapping the compact closed loudly. “This was fun but—”

“But nothing,” Lucien interrupted smoothly. “Stand up.”

And fuck, Elain did exactly as he told her to. Lucien rose to his feet, putting a hand on the small of her back to guide her back to his car. A valet had it pulled up and Lucien, still showing off, pulled a neatly folded bill from his pocket and handed it over without a second glance. Opening her door, Lucien’s expression told her he was not done with her and dinner was merely a prelude for whatever he’d planned next.

This time, Lucien slid his hand over her thigh and squeezed. A rush of heat flooded between her thighs, filling Elain with want.

“Where are you taking me?”

“What would impress you, Elain?” he asked instead, pulling from the road in a dark alley and cutting the ignition. Elain hesitated. “You hated every minute of that, didn’t you?”

She blinked. She wasn’t used to being called out this way. Lucien leaned forward, blanketing her in his scent. “Tell me the truth.”

“Yes,” she admitted. 

“What would it take to impress you?” he whispered, curling his other hand against her face. His thumb smeared lipstick over her cheek and Elain didn’t think she’d ever been so aroused in her life. She could feel her heart beating between her legs hot and insistent. 

“You can’t impress me,” Elain lied. In truth, she’d been impressed when he’d sidled up next to her at the bar and offered her nothing but his time and attention. Lucien knew it. One moment he was looking at her with his wild, needy eyes and the next his mouth was slanted over her own. 

Elain moaned at that first brutal touch. There was no polite first kiss, no slow seduction. It was as hot as he was, burning like there was fire just beneath his skin. His tongue swept into her mouth, hand tangled in her hair. Elain was electric, made all the worse when he yanked her into his lap. She leaned back, softly beeping his horn for all Lucien cared. He reclined his seat as far as it could go, forcing her to lay against him while he kissed her breathless and stupid. His face was messy from her mouth and when she pulled back to look, Lucien’s grin was feral and hot. 

“Did you make a mess of me?” he breathed, grabbing the back of her neck. He nipped almost painful kisses against her skin. “Am I making a mess of you?”

It was so utterly indecent. Elain pressed her hands against his strong chest. “I told you no sex on the first date.”

“As if you were going to give me a second,” he replied, skimming those same hands over the curve of her ass. “Besides, it’s hard to fuck you the way I want in my goddamn car.”

“Then what…” she trailed off when his hand slipped beneath her dress, brushing against her fabric.

“Soaked,” he taunted, lips back against her own. “When’s the last time you touched yourself?”

He rubbing her through the lace, teasing and taunting just enough to make her breathless but not so much he was giving her what she needed. 

“Last night,” she admitted, moaning against his jaw, her hips rolling against his hand. Lucien chuckled darkly. 

“Tell me.”

“You’re not the boss—”

Lucien tangled his free hand in her hair and tugged, exposing her throat. “Tell. Me.”

“Shower,” she panted, so obscenely turned on.

“Did you spray the water against your pretty pussy?” he asked, licking the column of her neck. 

“Yes.”

“All spread out?”

“Yes,” she whined, back to rocking against his hand. Lucien pulled the fabric apart, dipping one of his fingers into her body.

“What did you imagine?”

God she couldn’t tell him, it was so embarrassing. Lucien pushed and Elain couldn’t help the whimper that escaped.

“Tell me, baby. What was I doing to you?”

“Stop it,” she whispered and all at once his hands were gone. Lucien’s eyes were wide, his lust replaced by real fear. Elain ground herself against him. “I can’t say—”

Lucien kissed again, needy and hot, his hand back beneath her dress pumping roughly. His thumb rubbed against her clit, drawing out moan after moan. His tongue stroked against her own, his claiming, devouring her whole. 

“Was it this?” he asked, his voice a rasp. “Was I eating your pussy? Was I fucking you? Tell me, Elain. Tell me so—”

“Yes,” she agreed. “All of it.”

“Is that what you want?” he continued, each kiss sliding into the next. She was building, grinding in his lap. Lucien pushed a third finger into her body, filling her entirely with his touch, his claiming kiss. He curled those fingers, thumb rubbing tight circles and Elain came apart all over his legs and hands in a dark, abandoned alley. Lucien rode her through it, kissing hard until she was panting and sensitive. 

And then she was back in her seat while he wiped his hand against his thigh like nothing had happened. He restarted the car casually, as if she couldn’t see the large, heavy outline of him bulging in his pants.

“I—”

“The first time you touch me won’t be in my car,” Lucien interrupted before she could offer. 

“What will it be like?” she whispered. Lucien smiled, pulling them back onto the road. 

“Have you ever been tied up, Elain?”

Not really. Graysen had once bound her hands up in silk but she’d escaped easily. She suspected Lucien was not asking to do the same. “No.”

He nodded. “I have a proposition for you, if you’re interested.”

Still coming down from her orgasm, Elain was in a lusty fog. “What kind of proposition?”

Lucien gripped the steering wheel tightly for a moment. “I’m looking for a specific kind of relationship, Elain.”

She wasn’t sure she liked where this was going though she waited for him to just get it out. “I’m looking for a submissive. Do you understand what that means?”

She wasn’t stupid. “What sort of submissive?”

“In the bedroom,” he explained. “There would be…rules.”

She was certain he could deliver this information without making it sound so sinister. “What sort of rules?”

“I can send it to you,” he murmured, cutting a glance to her. “If you’re interested?”

“And if I’m not?”

“Then we part ways with no hard feelings,” he replied easily. “It’s not for everyone and I’m not in the business of forcing women into having sex with me.”

“But…but you won’t have sex without these conditions?” she questioned.

“Precisely.”

And Elain, who was perhaps not thinking entirely clearly and still far too interested in him, despite the disastrous date, decided to be bold again. “Send me your rules.”

Lucien smiled. “You got it, baby.”

LUCIEN: 

He didn’t hear from her all day. Lucien had his contract sent over that very next morning along with another good morning text. She’d said nothing at all, filling him with cold dread. Silence was an answer just as sure as anything and yet he couldn’t stop thinking about how she’d fucked his hand in his car and how it had still smelled like her when he’d gotten in that morning.

He wasn’t going to push. 

Still, he was in a foul mood when he returned home, throwing off his clothes angrily around his large bedroom. Phone tossed on the bed, Lucien paced restlessly. He could have had her all the same—he could have started out by meeting her expectations before easing her into it. He wanted too much all at once and Elain in that tight dress had made him too desperate.

Considering just walking it all back, Lucien went into his bedroom again where his phone screen was lit up against the black blankets.

My sister is a lawyer. I don’t think any of this is enforceable.

Of course it wasn’t. It was merely an agreement between them, one he could set expectations up front so there was no confusion later down the road. Not that things couldn’t be negotiated but Lucien had learned early it was better to just tell people what he wanted. Lucien liked to fuck rough, liked inflicting pain and he liked doing it to someone who wanted to take it. Clear consent, clear boundaries. 

Consider it guidelines, then.

He waited, staring at the blue bubbles on the other end. She’d read it and she wasn’t running. Lucien thought that was positive, over all. 

So you’d negotiate?

Fuck he would have done just about anything if she agreed. Still, there were some things he was unwilling to bend on—the submissive and the dominant roles being the most important.

Tell me your terms.

Elain was quick. 

I’m okay with spanking but no belts.

Reasonable. Lucien could abide by that. Still, he wondered if there was a middle ground as he texted:

What about paddles?

It took her a moment to formulate a response. Lucien appreciated how thoughtful she was.

Maybe. Ease me into it and we’ll see. How hard do you plan on going in the beginning?

Not hard at all, at this rate. He took a steadying breath.

We can start small, work our way into it. See what you like and what you don’t. 

He almost asked her to come over and find out. He’d tied her up with silk easy enough to escape and lick his way up and down her body. He wasn’t sure he wanted to fuck her just yet—Lucien was certain if he did, he’d compromise too much and lose the things he enjoyed, too. More bubbles from Elain.

How will you know if I don’t like something?

Lucien tapped out his reply.

We’ll have a safeword. Say it and I’ll stop. You have control, too, even if you’re yielding it. If you can’t trust me, this doesn’t work.

I barely know you.

Come over. Let’s rectify that. No contract—just conversation and whatever else feels good.

There was a beat and then—

Okay.

Lucien sent a car over, letting her know not to get on her bike given the lateness of the hour. Turning in a circle, he surveyed his apartment through the eyes of a new person. He hadn’t invited a woman over in…fuck. Since Jess, if he was honest. Not that he hadn’t had his moments in between but those were quick and dirty and never in his bed. 

Not that Elain was a girlfriend—Lucien didn’t want that. He merely wanted a reliable partner for sex, like a step above fuck buddy but step below girlfriend. Most women balked at that. He could see Elain finding fault with that, too, but Lucien had girlfriends in the past. Too messy, too painful. Jess had taken his heart out of his body and pulverized it beneath her immaculate shoes. No hard feelings, she’d said after sleeping with his best friend at the time. It hadn’t worked out with Tamlin but she’d almost launched herself into the stratosphere. Tamlin had money, power, and prestige without working for it. Lucien would always be working, would always be merely the seventh born son. 

Eris was too into blondes to ever give Jess the time of day. Still, Lucien hadn’t wanted a girlfriend before Jess, either. He’d merely romanticized her to the point of divorcing her desire to accumulate wealth and power from what he wanted her to be—someone who loved him for him, and not his last name.

He closed the door to his playroom firmly, though he intended to give her a tour if she expressed interest. He wouldn’t bring her in tonight…but maybe soon if she responded well to some light bondage and a small spark of pain. Lucien tied up his bedroom, changing out of his suit for a more casual set of black basketball shorts and an easily removed white t-shirt. He tied his hair off his face and left only ankle socks on his feet. Tossing his clothes in the hamper and his dishes in the sink, Lucien thought his space, big as it was, was obviously masculine and still tastefully decorated and inviting enough. It wasn’t as if she’d see much, anyway. The hall, the living room and the massive glass wall overlooking the city…but Lucien intended to veer her into his bedroom even if all she wanted was to talk. 

Get her used to coming straight here, at any rate.

A knock on his door sent Lucien scrambling, settling at the last minute to project an aura of cool. He opened the door casually, surprised to see Elain also casual. No dress and very little make-up. He could see the faint freckles on her nose and that ugly purple bruise still blotted against her fair, flawless skin. She had a bag shrugged over her shoulder which gave him hope. Dressed in skin tight leggings, slouchy boots, and an oversized top, he realized he’d been right that she was hot with and without the makeup. Had she put more lacy underwear on for him? Something to remove with his teeth, perhaps? 

She fiddled with the tail of her low pony. “I just brought the bag in case…I can go home—”

“No worries. Come in.” He hadn’t meant to leave her out in the hall ogling. 

Elain’s interest was polite, eyes wide as she drank in the large paintings on the wall and his immaculate furniture. 

“You know, the wealthy man who is a secret deviant is kind of a cliche,” she said, dropping her little bag by the door as she came into his bedroom. Lucien closed the open closet and the bathroom, having already closed the bedroom door. A mounted tv against the wall could provide entertainment if his hands and mouth could not, and Lucien thought it better if there was only them and four uninterrupted walls. 

“Oh yeah?” he replied, enjoying her sense of humor. “I’m starting to think you’re a brat, Elain.”

She sat on the edge of the bed, pulling out her phone to scroll through the photos she’d taken of his contract.

“It doesn’t say anything in here about being a bra—”

“You just are,” he interrupted. “I can work with that.”

“So I don’t have to be your docile little pet on a leash?”

“Jesus Christ, Elain.”

“I also see you want me on birth control–”

“I like to fuck raw,” was his explanation. “Go to the clinic and get checked out. I’ll do the same.” She blinked. 

“What’s the point of this? Is it like a NDA?’

He almost laughed. “I would prefer discretion, but I doubt anyone is interested that seriously in my sex life. It’s more like guidelines, like I said. I want to be upfront about what I’m looking for.”

“And what, exactly, are you looking for?”

Fuck. He recognized that guarded expression, her wary curiosity.

“Like a fuck buddy but with rules. As long as we’re doing this, we’re not fucking other people. No dating, no romance and if you change your mind, no hard feelings.”

“No dating,” she repeated. 

His heart pounded in his chest. “No dating.”

“You took me on a date yesterday.”

Ah, fuck. 

“That was different,” he tried to explain, unable to explain the relief cascading over her features.

“No dating is good. Great, even,” she replied.

“Because I’m so bad at it?” he tried to joke. Elain shook her head, toying with her ponytail again.

“My boyfriend broke up with me a few weeks ago and I’m sucking at getting over it. I don’t want another boyfriend…and I don’t think I would fit into your world, anyway. I’m always dating and maybe slowing down and figuring myself out and having a little fun without all the pressure of everything else would be nice.” Lucien’s relief was punctured by one sentence. I don’t think I would fit into your world, anyway.

He shook it off. “So…is that a yes?”

“It’s a conditional yes,” Elain replied. “I want to get a feel for it because I’m all in.”

She eyed the leather restraints resting against his headboard. 

“There’ll be none of that tonight,” Lucien murmured, though he very much hoped to spread her out at some point. Deciding he’d hold off on showing her the playroom, Lucien joined her on the bed. “Let's start easy.”

She nodded.

“The only thing I want to know right now is if you’re my good girl or if you’re my brat.”

Elain sucked in a breath, looking up at him with those wide, doe eyes. “What’s the difference?” she murmured as he stroked her face.

“My good girl lives to please me and a brat likes to push my buttons.”

“How would I know which one I was?” she whispered, eyes fluttering shut. Lucien wanted to kiss her. 

“My good girl would tell me how she really got this bruise,” he whispered, thumb rubbing over the hurt. “And I’d reward her for being honest.”

She exhaled against his palm. “And what would a brat do?”

“She’d make me pull it out of her.”

“I think I’d rather be your good girl,” Elain whispered, unaware of how immediately tight his entire body went. That was Lucien’s favorite dynamic, though he didn’t mind a little brattiness from time to time. 

Still stroking her face, Lucien murmured, “Tell me, baby girl, who hurt you.”

He waited for her natural resistance, for her to tell him some little lie. Elain opened those sweet, wide eyes and he watched her give in. Testing herself to see how it felt. Trusting this moment and him, too. If he reacted badly, if he flew off the handle or punished her unfairly, Elain would back away. He’d promised to reward her. 

“His name is Jack. He pushed me down the stairs.”

Lucien swallowed his hatred. “Is Jack the ex-boyfriend?”

“Arina’s,” she said, scooting a little closer. He could see, from the anger and anguish warring in her features, that Elain needed to tell someone this. He was a stranger, harmless to her. 

Ex-boyfriend. 

“No one gets to put a hand on what’s mine,” Lucien murmured. Elain practically melted at his words. She wanted to be taken care of which worked out perfectly well for Lucien. “Do I need to teach him a lesson?”

“He’s gone,” she murmured, some of the fantasy shifting into reality. He saw the wariness return. Too far, though Lucien wasn’t about to let it go. Not yet, anyway. Maybe he’d put it on Eris’s radar if he was still panting after the roommate. 

“You’ll tell me if he comes back.” It wasn’t a question. And Elain, the good little thing, nodded her head.

“Good girl,” he praised. “My good girl. I reward my girl when she’s good. Do you want to know how?”

Elain nodded, letting him push her gently to the bed. This was easy, was just a test run. He had every intention of putting her on her on her knees but first, rewards. After all, Lucien had promised and she’d been honest. Elain watched, heavy lidded, as Lucien straddled her hips. “Arms up.”

She did exactly as she was told, letting him pull off her shirt and find the lacy black bra beneath. He couldn’t help his smile.

“For me?”

She nodded, biting her bottom lip. Lucien dragged a finger over the fabric, teasing her nipples just beneath. “Take it off.”

Her back arched, pushing her body against his erection without meaning to. She sucked in a breath but didn’t stop, unsnapping quickly and sliding it over her arms. Just like that, Elain’s small, pert breasts were all but in his face. Naked from the top up, Lucien wasn’t sure he’d ever seen anyone half as sexy. Her hair tumbled around her face, half covering her from view. It was all he could do not to bury his face between them though Lucien wasn’t above a little groping. His hands dwarfed her, taking them entirely into his palm. Elain watched, her eyes impossibly dark, chest rising and falling rapidly.

“Are you going to be loud for daddy?” he asked because God he wanted to hear her scream. Lucien wanted to see her on her hands and knees and beg, but for now, learning that she needed to articulate what she wanted—and loudly—was enough. Elain nodded, still watching.

He licked the length of her abdomen, taking her pants in his teeth and tugging. She gasped softly and Lucien thought it was probably too easy to impress her. 

“When’s the last time someone ate this pretty pussy, Elain?”

She swallowed hard. “Um…”

He waited, sliding his fingers into the band of her pants to help shimmy them down her body. “I asked you a question.”

“I can’t remember,” she admitted, jumping ever so slightly at the tone of his voice. “A year, maybe?”

Lucien felt bewildered. “What about your boyfriend?” He said it with an ugly sneer. 

“He didn’t like it,” she said, utterly naked save for the matching thong. Lucien was obsessed with the thought of Elain dressing herself up for him, putting on cute little things only he could see.

Lucien lowered himself before her, slinging her slim thighs up over his shoulders. 

“No wonder you’re so needy,” he murmured, kissing her pussy through the fabric. “You’ve been neglected.”

Elain whined softly as he nuzzled against her, inhaling the sweet, musky scent of her body. What kind of man had this wet, soft creature in his bed and didn’t devour her? Lucien had been dying to have her pussy on his face since he’d met her, since he’d watched her cross and uncross her legs in his chair. 

Pulling her out of them, Lucien stared for a moment at her bare, soaking cunt. Spread open and quivering, Lucien couldn’t believe he’d put his fingers inside her and then drove her home. If he’d known how fucking sexy she was, he’d have had his cock in her, needs be damned. 

“Fuck, baby,” he praised, rubbing her clit with his thumb. Elain responded with a sweet moan. “So wet for me.”

He was toying with her, watching how she arched and wiggled. She’d come so easily on his hand, drenching his pant leg in her slick. Lucien had smelled her on his skin all day no matter how hard he’d scrubbed. Now he’d have her on his tongue every time he spoke.

“I’m going to taste you, now,” Lucien told her, breathing the words against her wet skin. “And you’re going to be really loud for me so I know what you like. Do you understand, baby?”

“Yes,” she breathed. 

“Yes what?”

“Yes, sir,” she replied. Close enough. Lucien would take it, at any rate. He hadn’t quite figured it out with her, though he was usually sir with the others. He was testing out the whole daddy thing, had always wanted that dynamic, though he’d never had a submissive who made it seem genuine. Elain looked so sweet, so innocent that it felt more natural. 

Tired of teasing and fascinated with the thought that there had been a man out there that hadn’t like eating pussy, Lucien slid his tongue up the length of her, just to see if maybe there was something bad about the way she tasted. He groaned, grinding his cock into the bed at the explosion against his senses. She was fucking good, better, even, that he’d imagined. There was a sweetness that clung to her that made her more than palatable. He could have bottled her and worn her like cologne if he’d had half a mind.

“This is my pussy now,” he told her, offering slow, languid swipes of his tongue against her trembling clit. “No one else gets to touch it. No one but me gets to taste. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir,” she moaned, grinding her hips into his face.

“Greedy,” he warned, noting how her eyes went wide. “Behave yourself.”

And fuck Lucien if she didn’t settle herself down, spreading her legs wider. One day he’d let her be wild, would let her do whatever she liked but today she’d do everything he said if only to prove this was a good fit for them both. 

“Good girl,” he praised, returning to his kissing and sucking. Elain merely moaned every time he did something that felt good and remained silent when he didn’t. It’s how Lucien learned she didn’t like the hard and fast flicks and didn’t like when he combined sensations all at once. She liked a steady pressure and the flat of his tongue stroking up and down the center of her while his fingers teased at her opening without actually penetrating. Her hips began to roll again, her moaning reaching a fever pitch. Lucien wanted to die, was so hard he couldn’t think straight. She was so hot, so wet and when Lucien pushed a finger into her gasping, sucking pussy, he was reminded that she was tight, too.

She came apart with a scream, writhing and grinding against his face until he pushed her back to the bed. It was enough to punish her, at any rate, though he rode her through it just because he liked the sight of her naked.

“What did I tell you about being greedy?” he gasped when she was done, catching her wide eyes filled with lust.

“Sorry–”

“Get up,” he ordered, stunned when she scrambled to her feet to obey. Her tits bounced as Elain stood at the edge of the mattress, her legs still trembling from her orgasm. Lucien reached for a pillow and dropped it at her feet so she’d have something soft to kneel against. 

“Take off my shorts,” he said. Her eyes sharpened, stepping towards him.

“Can…can I take off your shirt, too? Sir,” she amended quickly.

“Daddy,” he replied, gauging her reaction. 

“Daddy,” she breathed. “Please?”

“Yes,” he agreed, if only to be as naked as she was. Lucien was still struck dumb by the soft curve of her body, the flare of her hips and the pull of her waist. Her breasts were perfect, tilted upwards towards the sky and tipped with the rosiest nipples he’d ever seen. Elain was stunning, obviously gorgeous but every inch of her was somehow pretty. He didn’t know how to describe it any other way.

She was careful with his shirt, sliding up over his chest was careful fingers. Lucien swallowed a groan at this slow exploration, helping her get it over his head, given Elain was a good head and shoulders smaller than him. Petite was the right word, he supposed. 

Perfection.

She stared for a moment, hands at her sides. “Someday, I’ll let you lick,” he murmured, reaching for her wrists and putting them against the waistband for his shorts. “Something other than my cock, I mean.”

She gazed up through dark lashes. 

“Take them off and then get on your knees.”

Elain treated his shorts and briefs the same way she’d done with the shirt. Slowly removing, fingertips grazing his skin. Her eyes went wide when his cock sprang free, swollen and thick and practically weeping precum. Elain sank to her knees, letting him tug her ponytail from her hair and sweep the curls up in his fingers.

“Greedy girls suck cock just the way I like,” he told her. “And I like to bruise your throat. Do you understand?”

“Yes, daddy,” she whispered. He was going to come in five seconds, he just knew it. 

“Open your mouth, baby,” he ordered. “Be my good girl and stick out your tongue.”

She did so immediately, allowing him to wipe the beaded moisture of his slit against the pillowy soft tongue hanging between her lips.

“Swallow.”

She did, never taking her eyes off him.

“Good girl. Open again.”

This time, Lucien pushed himself into her mouth, stopping when he heard her gag softly. She barely had a third of him. He’d have to train her but Lucien had the time and the inclination. He’d bring her to work with him, put her beneath his desk, and have her work him root to tip all day like it was her greatest purpose in life. 

Dragging himself out, Lucien managed one command. “Suck.”

She did, hollowing her cheeks, eyes never leaving his face.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty like this.”

Elain didn’t say anything at all, though a flush of pleasure stole over her cheeks. She was a perfect submissive, he decided. Rough around the edges but eager to please and so utterly trainable.

Lucien practically vibrated with delight, holding her face steady to push himself into her. 

“Can you take more? Widen your jaw, baby,” he murmured, watching her gasp a quick breath of air before he pushed further, the crown of his aching cock hitting the spongy softness of her throat. 

“Use your hand,” he added when it was clear anymore would hurt her. He was holding himself back, easing her in, just as he’d promised.  “Perfect. You’re perfect, baby. Look at how pretty you are, sucking my cock.”

Tears slid from her eyes, dragging mascara with it. Next time he hoped she didn’t wear it, though he wiped it with his thumbs as he pumped in and out of her mouth. She timed her hand, using her saliva to lubricate his skin. 

“My good girl,” Lucien praised, every inch of him impossibly tight. He was clenching his ass to keep from coming though he couldn’t hold back much longer. “Are you going to swallow daddy’s come? Hm? Good girls swallow.”

She hummed her approval and Lucien groaned again.

“Good girl,” he said, increasing his hips until all he could hear was the wet sucking and gagging of her mouth. “Fuck, Elain—” he came with a rough, ugly grunt, pushing an inch further than he’d meant to. Hot ropes of come spurted from his cock directly into her throat and Elain, with on hand bracing his naked thigh, her eyes wide with surprise, took it all. 

He hauled her to her feet, game over for the moment. “Good job, Elain, you did so well, c’mere—” he kissed her, lavishing praise and soft touches over her skin. At some point he’d keep her as his submissive the entire time she was in his apartment but for now, Lucien let her slide back into herself, the part that sassed him back, at any rate. 

Lucien got her into the bed, pushing back the blankets and tossing her his shirt while he pulled on his shorts. The sight of her draped in his clothes made him achy all over again. 

Tugging her against his chest, Lucien stroked her hair.

“How was it?”

“A little weird,” she admitted. “But I liked it. I uh…it felt nice,” she said, nuzzling into his chest. 

“Good,” he murmured. “I’ll take care of you, alright? You can always stop–”

“Should we pick a safe word?”

They should have at the fucking beginning. He’d gotten lucky she hadn’t needed it. “Yeah. What do you want? Something that doesn’t belong in the bedroom…so don’t choose stop.”

She frowned. “How about vodka?”

He smiled, kissing her forehead. “Works for me.”

“Isn’t cuddling outside of the bounds of fuck buddies?”

“Nah. First of all, we’re  between fuck buddies and dating. Like…friends with very specific benefits.  And afterwards, you should get used to being taken care of, especially if something is painful. It’s just good practice…and I’m not above a little cuddling, besides.”

“What are you above?”

Lucien shifted uncomfortably. “Vodka.”

“Are you safe wording this conversation?”

“Yes. I don’t want to discuss what might convince me into a relationship. I don’t want one.” His voice was too hard though he kept his touch light, sweet. “Trust I won’t change my mind.”

That settled her.

“Well…just for the record, friends with benefits implies some manner of friendship. You could be open without worrying I want to date you.”

But Lucien didn’t trust that. He wanted to believe her because Elain was earnest and nice and had done everything he asked. He’d been around too many women with ulterior motives, who wanted to be a Vanserra more than they wanted anything else.

He kissed her head.

“Let’s watch a movie baby,” he murmured. 

She curled closer. “Whatever you want.”

Lucien smiled. 

“Good girl.”

#elucien #elucien fanfiction #elucien smut #elucien fic #elain x lucien #what i love about lucien #is consistently he is like #i am not tempted #and then is IMMEDIATELY tempted #right into marriage

[absolutebl]

Hello, hello!! It's me, your favorite graduate, back with a burning question! ;)

I am in the middle of episode 11 of Why R U? (literally paused in the middle of it because I am WAY too invested in FighterTutor and am seriously dreading what is coming) - what a messy, cringey show. There are so many freaking characters, and my question is inspired by one that I have come to love, Kae. He is Tutor's boss at the bakery, and after he (bravely, in IRL standards) confronts Fighter's dad I realized just how much I appreciated his character and how annoyed I am that the show couldn't cut down its cabal of unnecessary characters to focus on more interesting ones. Not only is he an astonishingly great example (for a BL!!) of a queer "elder" in the community - he protects Tutor from creepy customers, gives him a job when he needs one and looks for help when he needs more work, is working-class himself, and tries to give advice to this lonely queer kid he's taken under his wing - he also seems to be a rare less-stereotypical portrayal of a Thai person with darker skin (if not the only, honestly, in my limited experience watching these shows).

So! My question is, are there any side characters or even guest characters (like Kae is billed as) who you wish had been given more latitude or importance in the plot/story of a BL?

OMG what a great question. YES SO MANY. Let me see if I can come up with a top 10. Does it have to be individuals? Can I pick a few couples (I won’t go too far because therein lies madness)? 

Top 10 Side Characters I Wish We Got More Screen Time

In no particular order.  

1. Touch & Daisy in Secret Crush On You

Is anyone surprised by this choice?

2. Choi Yu Na, JaeYeong’s bisexual bestie in Semantic Error

She was just... so effortlessly cool. Do I need to say more? 

3. TulHin in Love By Chance 2

I LOVE THEM, OKAY. Classic whipping boy, my goddamn catnip. And these two actors had amazing chemistry. Ae’s whole arc and character should have been dropped from this script in favor of more time with these truly damaged goods. Yes, I said it. Sorry Perth. 

AND ALSO 

4. Keen in Love By Chance 2

Can’t believe I chose multiples from MAME trash but heh, whatever is necessary for the truth right? Basically this show needed a massive rewrite, but it could have been done. 

That’s what’s so frustrating about MAME’s stuff, it’s so close to being amazing...  It’s like this fantastic 5 course meal but you will be barfing at some point. Maybe the end? Maybe the middle? Maybe multiple times? It’s a regurgitation surprise! 

5. Fong the Philosopher in Still 2gether 

Khaotung is untaped genius at physical comedy. I love him in this role SO HARD. I think we got a lot from him in season one, but I wanted more in season 2. 

6. PokeTongue in Gen Y 2 & What Zabb Man

Look we all know that during Gen Y 2 they were actually pretending to be in some other show. And frankly, we all would have rather been watching that show. Then they got given an actual other show and we STILL wanted more of them. 

7. ChampDoc in TharnType 2

I take the 5th. 

8. Beer in Oxygen

I just wanna look at James but he’s getting his own series (Bed Friends) so I’m okay now. 

9. Sky & Pai in La Cuisine 

Talk about crumbs. What? I mean WHAT WAS THAT? They had these two in their back pocket all along and DIDN’T use them? WHAT? 

10. VegasPete in KinnPorsche

Oh I fucking said it. You were all thinking it from ep 10 on, weren’t you? Why the hell didn't this start in ep 5? Vegas was entirely unnecessary as a love interest for Porsche. It would have been fine, no BETTER, if Porsche & Vegas had developed as a friendship and Vegas had NOTICED Pete in a significant way much earlier.* 

* Don’t comment on this. I’m not interested in this weird KP fandom imaginary-connection muck-wanking thing you’re all AO3ing all over Tumblr like a bad rash. And I could not care less about the original y-novel.  

Honorable Mention

All the GLs that should have had more screen time like the cuties in Meow Ears Up, InkPa in Bad Buddy, and Friend Zone 2, and I could keep going.

 The angry roommate ex lover in Love Class. I just really loved the actor and was very intrigued by the character. We could have spent much less time exploring the stalker story and more time with this boy and still kept the dumb sort KBL length. All in all, the weight of this narrative was all over the place but not using this character to the fullest was a problem.

The two besties of the seme in Mr Unlucky, SO CUTE.

The nerdy support boy who knows what it’s like to be gay and the artsy girl with serious self defense skills from Blueming.

The whole university friendship group that *almost* happened in Cherry Blossoms After Winter.

Tim in My Secret Love, preferably shirtless. 

Nutch in Not Me. 

Mew the ex boyfriend in Together With Me. I don’t know what they were doing with his character. And they didn’t either. But ho boy was he EASY on the eyes. So easy. I mean it takes work to pull attention away from MaxTul and he had ALL MY ATTENTION. 

And (drum roll please) . . . 

K.O. & HAO MEI (Love O2O) 

I will die on this tiny hill of censored bromance. More of them would have substantially improved this show. 

I'm not picking shows that couldn’t be saved. 

So I love KhunKaow in Brothers and CopyNampu in Top Secret Together and SanAei in You’re My Sky, Saint in Our Days, Jun in Love Area 2, but I don't think more of them could have save their respective shows because then it would have been MORE terrible show to watch. I call these the "I'm your huckleberry" awards. I give one each year to the couple that was the only good thing in an otherwise irredeemable show. Like Val Kilmer in Tombstone (bite me).

Current as of Aug 2022, there are a bunch airing right now that could make this list. 

(source)

#thai bl #chinese bl #side character #bl side dishes #bl sides #secondary couples #Love O2O #KinnPorsche #VegasPete #La Cuisine the series #oxygen the series #ChampDoc #TharnType 2 #Gen Y 2 #What Zabb Man! #Star Hunter Studio #PokeTongue #2gether #Love By Chance 2 #TulHin #Choi Yu Na #Semantic Error #Secret Crush On You #scoy #TouchDaisy #Korean BL #KBL K-BL

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hi! This seems so cute and if you’re still doing these I’d like to be matched! (Doing this on anon too bc my blog is horribly biased)

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why?: I have two actually! The first one is “Everything Changes in Time” by Madds Buckley and the lyric that I love so much is “Don’t say we’ll meet again, you could change your mind, everything changes in time”. The other one is “Not Strong Enough” by boy genius and the lyrics is “Not strong enough to be your man”. I don’t think I can fully explain why either of these songs without pouring my entire heart out so, I’ll leave it at that for now.

What is your Enneagram type?: uhhh I took a test online and the highest ones I got were type 9 (peacemaker), type 4 (individualist), and type 5 (investigator)

Do you love gargantuan Youtube video essays, and if so, which is your favorite and why?: YES!! I DO!!! I LOVE VIDEO ESSAYS SO BAD U HAVE NO CLUE! My favorite is definitely Fear of Depths by Jacob Geller which just delves into people’s fear of the ocean. I love it because I love the ocean it’s one of my favorite things because of how terrifying it is!!

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend: I actually didn’t have an imaginary friend as a kid. I tried to make one up and have one, because I thought that was what kids did, but I couldn’t make myself believe in them and it made me frustrated. I did however have various imaginary animals. I didn’t believe in them being like real but I didn’t have an easier time pretending I had animals then people.

What is your go-to way to fall asleep?: I have to be listening to something to fall asleep it’s like one of my worst traits tbh. So usually if some rp asmr (big surprise there), or a podcast, or just ocean sounds if I can’t handle words.

If you had to change your name, what would it be, and why? (In tandem, if you have changed your name, why did you pick that one?): I’m trans so I actually did pick my name out! A lot of people chose their name based of the meaning of the name or for a reason that means something to them. I picked mine purely off of vibes alone. I heard the name and was like “yeah that sounds like it would be my name” and to this day I have never regretted that decision. It’s my name and I’m very happy with it!

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why?: I love the audios where multiple characters are interacting with each other. So obviously the Friendsgiving audios hold a special little place in my heart, so does the DAMN bowling audio. But I also love the solstice videos and the Smash tournament!

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.): Vega. I’m sorry. He talks to much. I genuinely can’t bring myself to give a fuck about whatever he is rambling about. I know there is probably lore in his series but I find him so boring.

Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to.: There were multiple years, where my entire family hated the movie Princess and the Frog, because when I was a kid I watched it every single day, multiple times a day. I can still quote the whole movie beginning to end. I love it. That movie is Disney’s magnum opus and nothing they have made since could ever live up to it. (Also fuck Disney! Just throwing that out there)

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend?: Hush! I am not interested in him as a romantic character by any means, but me and him would make great friends! He is silly and just a little murderous! Love him for it!

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.): I don’t know if this is my tired ramble, but any time someone asks me to ramble about something my default topic is horror. Whether it’s horror movies, series, books, art. It’s such an interest of mine and I love it to death. I could go on for hours about horror movies!

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo.: Diet Coke or a monster ultra (all monster ultra flavors are delicious) and Cheetos hot fries!

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment.: if we are talking about music playlists, it’s my playlist called “Where is your rage” which is a collection of songs that aren’t what I think most people would think of as angry songs but they are more like a somber anger.

What’s your guilty pleasure media, and why?: Mobile otome games! Especially cringy ones! I love mystic messenger and obey me to death. I wouldn’t say this one is cringy but The Arcana too! I also just really like playing dating sims in general but the mobile otome games are definitely a guilty pleasure.

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are!: This one is just random but putting religious references in any media is the quickest way to get me to like it more!

Ooh, so this one was fun for me as a fellow Type Nine. It gave me a fun opportunity to think about our Enneagram and who is good for people like us, and that would be Damien.

Type Nines are thoughtful and sensitive people, the Peacekeepers, prone to not prioritizing diplomacy and other in times of conflict; Damien would nip that shit in the bud. The fire elemental would always have you and your best interests in mind, taking care of you, making sure you drink one water for every godforsaken Monster Ultra, and watching The Princess and The Frog despite his bitching. (Damien complains, but he actually loves that movie and sees a lot of himself in Tiana.)

You and Damien living and being together would be so fun. Like, yes, he’s a study bug and a gym rat. Yes, he gets on your butt to eat and drink healthily but he loves you. He loves you so much, he watches your horror movies with you even though they scare him to death. He loves you so much, he drives you to the beach as often as he can even though it’s a 90+ minute drive and gas prices go up day by day. He makes it fun, ya know?

Song:

I was scared of dentists and the dark/ I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations/ Oh, all my friends are turning green/ You're the magician's assistant in their dream/ Ah-ooh-ooh-ooh, ah-ahh-ah-ah/ And they come unstuck

One. Riptide? Ocean imagery? Done deal. Two, now that I mentioned Damien driving the two of you to the ocean, I couldn’t stop picturing it, you know? Like, this song so fits the vibe of having familiar, intimate conversations and telling each other childhood memories while you go down the Pacific Coast Highway (at the speed limit because duh Damien).

Runner-ups:

Lasko is a runner-up because you’re both Type Nines and because he’d love to watch horror movies with you; I like to think he’s got a super strong stomach for it. Guy is another runner-up, my favorite one actually, because he’d share your love for not just horror but also all things otome game. He has them all and is more than happy to share them with you.

note: thank you for waiting 💕

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

#redactedasmr #redactedverse #redacted asmr #redactedaudio #redacted audio #redacted #busybee matches

[engagemythrusters]

okay. ahsoka ep 3.

i already know jacen is in this bc i got SPOILED but let me tell you im gonna still be shocked anyway skldjflkd

k here we go

These introductions are pointless. Like we saw the last ep last week. If we forgot we can just look it up.

OH WOW she’s hot

“Not bad but not good” WOW HUYANG. Oh wow this guys comin for Sabines whole LIFE here damn

Um ig Ahsoka forgot that Mandalorians can hold their own against jedi just damn fine? Sabine once beat KANAN

Ahsoka: okay time to pretend to be Kanan

UH OKAY. UM. “I can’t see how am I supposed to fight” WAS A STUPID LINE TO GIVE TO SABINE WREN, THE WOMAN RAISED BY KANAN JARRUS, A NOTABLE BLIND JEDI

God can you imagine being stupid enough to give that line to her? Did filoni or Favreau write that line? Sounds on par with how idiotic those two dipshits are. Like that is so stupid. Who is that STUPID.

That’s like an anti-Kanan reference. That’s fucking Kanan retconning.

God I’m so MAD.

Honest to god I’m kinda glad this is only 30 mins long this time. I’m fucjing mad.

She fights like Sabine though. I love this actress for her. She’s doing Sabine so well. Thank you <3

Nyooooom

is mON MOT—SHE IS

Hooray chancellor mothma

JACEN!!!!!

I mean in name only so far but still. My lil snow pea boy

“Causing trouble with chopper” I’m so glad that droid is giving the galaxy hell with multiple generations of syndullas. Here’s to chopper outliving us all

HEY SHUT UP ABOUT HRR FINDING HER SON

She should be allowed to find her son the war hero at any costs

GET HIS ASS

“People who were like family to me” okay uh so that’s a workaround for saying Kanan? But Kanan wasn’t even killed by

JACEN

“Aunt” WHAT

She’s his SISTER

He looks a little like Kanan would have looked. AND NOTHING LIKE HERA (enter usual rant about PISS POOR CHARACTER DESIGN)

Also like. He wants to be a jedi 😭

LIKE HIS FATHER BEFORE HIM 😭

God that look. She’s thinking of Kanan 😭😭😭

“Everyone could be a jedi” is the STUPIDEST TAKE

God i hate this fucking show

And I fucking hate filoni and Favreau so. Fuckingn. Much.

Huyang does NOT like Sabine

And he’s right about jedi and force wielders

She’s so cute I love u Sabeeen <3

T-6 shuttle shot

I love u T-6 shuttles

Wow those are fuckin… old ass ships. Clone war era.

I mean T-6 is even older but I love it so. I do not care.

Also hang on rewind a sec to the “few mandalorians have ever been jedi” okay how do you KNOW that. The two of you have been at odds so much for so long that I’m sure millions went by unnoticed by the jedi

Downgraded from Spheres In Space to fucking Circle In Space 🙄

I love Huyang he’s a bitch

Oh T-6 shuttle they’re really in it now

Oop floaty in space

Huyang out for the count again xoxo

Shin Hati is such a little shit and I ADORE her

She space-suited up in 3 seconds or some shit. God I hate sci fi.

Get yourself ahsoka you’re the dumbass who chose to stand outside

Shin Hati 👁 👁 fr

Oh

My

God

P U R R G I L

Ezra are u there?! 😭😭😭😭

okay after the initial AAAA umm yeah I’m thoroughly disappointed

The purrgil looked so BEAUTIFUL in design and colour and pattern in Rebels… only to be Giant Grey Things in this show?

God I fucking HATE this show.

Anyway half this episode is literally just space fighting. That’s so stupid.

I do like tbis planet. It’s dull and drab like everything else this show has done BUT at least the aesthetic of this one is meant to be dark and drab and dull

Anyway can they go back and follow the fucking purrgil yet

Mr Inquisitor I kind of hope you’re someone cool we already know. That’s a cool trope that I want to see in canon. If not that’s okay I want a cool inquisitor anyway.

So they’re meant to pick up thrawns ship? Like the way Jedi ships used to—

The way DT says purrgil has shocked me to near silence

That’s so funny it’s great and hard in his voice

So yeah that was stupid and awful and it’s good that was only 30 mins of disappointment rather than fucking 50 or whatever

Still love the vibes of this outtro tho. Wish the rest of the show was this cool.

now we just need -rex - ezra - direct kanan mention (like NAMED)

#star wars: ahsoka #spoilers #god am I so displeased with this show.

[taegularities]

Hey rid, hope you're doing fine, soooo I've been thinking about this for a while now and I feel like I want to share it with you now, I was like really thinking of a fic/genre? Like online dating with loads and loads of angst and fluff? And I'm not talking about smauS, something like, the main characters meeting in a game? ( pretty realistic yep ik😂) with a snarky/mean reader and a soft..very soft/ emotional/ romanticist/ understanding basically husband material MC ( I feel like jk or v would suite this character but it could anyone) the oc is a bitch from outside but she's just as soft perhaps even more than the MC, all in all she's a nice and good character and that's why our perfect fell for her, he's also not a fuckboy or anything rarely dated anyone, oc does not have enough experience in sex, MC doesn't either but he's better than the oc, something like they grow and learn everything together, Falling in love, everything, angst could be related to both of their families? Like thy both have fucked up families the OCs mother is very mean but very protective over her ( oh and oc has 2 older sisters aswell) MC is sick of his dad, his dad is extremely mean to him aswell, the only best thing in their life is their relationship s sort of another world for them, where he's extremely affectionate to her and she's a meanie but also extremely affectionate to him aswell (the oc also has some health issues and she's always like sick, but he even love that about her, he loves everything about her, her sickness, her being mean, and a bitch, and also when she's showering her with love but that's a rarity given she's not used to showing affection, but he knows it, he can see when she's overly concerned when he gets sick or when he's having a bad day she would go out of her way to do anything for him, spend the whole day gaming with him eventhough she sucks at it or talking to him on call talking about random things eventhough she's not very talkative, basically very very fluffy and just lovey dovey) so yeah lmao u can say I've really thought about this..and I'm feel like you would give this fic justice, you're the only writer that came to mind who I can trust this fic with, but there's really mo pressure here, just a suggestion, and even if you chose not to make it in a fic that's completely okay aswell, Maybe that'll be my go to write a fic of my own lmao, I'm no writer by any chance it's just that I really really want to bring this fic into existence, AND I WANT STRESS ON THE FACT THAT YOU DONT HAVE TO DO IT IF YOU DONT WANT TO ITS COMPLETELY OKAY TO NOT WANT TO, THERES NO PRESSURE AT ALL AND NO BAD FEELINGS, LIKE AT ALL SO DONT FEEL BAD, (uk just in case)

hey lovely, i'm so sorry i'm so late, i promise i wasn't ignoring you jashdajkd i hope you've been all well !!! that's a cute idea 😭 idk why i'm always drawn to those cocky yet soft male characters, but i'd love to work with a pure, innocent, simp-y lil boy once.

ahhh, i definitely won't have time to write this, though, and i don't do requests; especially very specific ones mess up my creativity :') (can barely write my own stuff these days tbh 😭) BUT i would love to see this fic happen if anyone else wrote it or even you wrote it !! 🥺 that'd be a great opportunity for you, if you ever wanna try. it sounds sweet !! <33

#and thank you for thinking of me fr 🥺 #notes for rid 🌹 #anon #long ask

[chirpovs]

i’ll do a full essay on what I think is fundamentally wrong with ROP later but for now? just Some Thoughts (TM)

oh boy

it’s not really bad I guess, but it’s also not really good and there are a lot of bits that made me cock my head and go hmmmmmmm

The Good

- they’ve done pretty well with all the scenery and visuals, the elven cities and khazad dum in particular are great imo

- the diversity is great even though it does feel a little tokenistic seeing as most of the characters are still white dudes

- I generally enjoy Elrond and Galadriel’s characters, moreso than I thought I would

- despite the buzzcut Arondir is one of the few elves I believe is an elf

- the Elrond and durin plot is nice, enjoyed that whole bit

- enjoyed the dwarves in general tbh

- even though it doesn’t really make sense that they’re there, I’m enjoying the early hobbits and their story

The Bad

- everyone has said it and I’ll say it again: the elves. literally all of them except Galadriel and Gil Galad look like Some Dude. biggest offence award goes to Finrod who looks like he’d try to mansplain to me

- I feel like they introduced a bit too much in the first two episodes. we now have at least four separate storylines going on, we’re jumping between about half a dozen locations, and we’ve got a lot of characters going on. Obviously they’ll all link together but I feel a bit like they should have been more gradually brought in

- Theo annoys me immensely ngl

- costumes feel a little lacklustre but I’m not seriously bothered I guess

- uncomfortable tension between Elrond and Galadriel, what’s gonna happen when he marries her daughter

And The Ugly

- where the fuck are celeborn and celebrian????

- the way this is set up seems to be that Elrond and Galadriel are both young elves striving to be heard (in different ways obv), bit of an underdog story. but like uh both of them are already important and have been for quite some time and also Galadriel is older than literally all of them

- I’m not super convinced this feels like middle earth. I guess we’ve only had two eps so far and there hasn’t been a whole lot of worldbuilding time yet, but it feels more like we’ve been in a bunch of places that could exist in middle earth but I’m not convinced they’re there

- also kinda feel like if you’re coming into this completely unfamiliar with Tolkien then it doesn’t necessarily do the greatest job in setting up the world

- due to Amazon not actually having the rights to the silm, we lose a lot of context. examples being, very weird glossing over of the kinslaying? offhand mentioning of the silmarils which just leaves people who aren’t aware of them confused? they’re trying to tell a story they don’t have rights to and that’s definitely gonna come back to bite them

- is the implication that the dwarves have a silmaril because ummmmmmmm excuse me maedhros u had one job (that would be a dumb af plot to do)

Other things that irked me:

- Elrond’s thing with durin being that as an elf he sees the passage of time differently and 20 years is nothing to him. it’s not like his twin brother chose to be mortal, I’m sure he’s aware of the passage of time to mortals

- sailing to Valinor does not work like that and Galadriel literally is banned from going back but okay

- I don’t buy Galadriel being bullied as a child at all

#rings of power #trop #I have other thoughts but this is it for now

[kosi-annec]

BNHA season 2 stain arc next! The second half of the season~

My review of Season 2 part 2:

Oh boy, every introverts worst nightmare; social interaction. If I was in deku's situation, I would've acted like I didn't knew wit the man was talking about www

Iida stop lying to your friends please TOT

Yay aizawa isn't a mummy lol. I still can't believe deku only got 1 offer, like cmon, even zero has more than him. Also, mineta shut the fuck up, like you're any better

LMAO aizawa warning them to be careful with their choice of hero name cuz of his own experience

Hero name time!! Omfg aoyama's hero name I can't 😭😭 thank you tsu for being normal www

Aww lil deku comin up with all might themed names, tho ngl a lil embarrassing if he chose one of em

Ok the fact that denki knows who Hemingway, an American novelist, shows that he might not be academically smart, but he's not entirely stupid. Headcanon that he reads english books on his free time

Hhhhh great flashback to tensei q-q, nooo iida pls you deserve to take on the name

LMAO bakugo not being able to keep a hero name he's came up with 😂

Mineta, why tf are you still here... Ofc he'd go for mt. Lady

Pft all might being terrified of grand tornino, wonder how hard his training was under him

Oh god... Iida off to do a dumb decision...

Hhhh iida pls they're your friends, but this is what happens when you're being powered by the need for vengeance

Omg I forgot about the first introduction to grand torino LMAO and him pretending to be a feeble old man with a bad memory, he's an old gremlin that can kick ass, he's like yoda but sassy www

And now deku getting his ass handed to him, srsly how tf is his back not broken, I mean with the speed grand torino goes at, it would at least crack somethin

Ah yes, bakugo and best jeanist, good luck in trying to stitch in some manners in this boy lol

LMAO poor Momo and Kendo, thinking they'll get to do some action pact crime fighting stuff when in actuality they're just gonna model

Oh boy, endeavor... Yeah you tell him shoto!!

Deku treating his quirk like something that isn't his makes a lot of sense, since he's never really had a quirk before so he doesn't really see it as an extension of himself. Gotta love seeing a protagonist that's powerful but obviously has a long way to go and still needs training to hone their skills

BAHAHA BAKUGO'S HAIR 😭😭

Oh shit, the whole nomu situation and the multiple quirks thing. I kinda feel bad for the people that get turned to nomus, like pretty sure they didn't want to lose all sense of self

"Someone as crazy as this" that's rich coming from you shigaraki.

Oh god iida no... I get ur going through some emotional shit and want justice, but u don't wanna be a murderer, even if this is a villain

"We're not going to go after anyone that big" ya jinxed yourself grand torino

Thank you mister blue guy that iida is interning under whose name I can't remember for trying to put some sense into him

OH SHIT TIME FOR SOME ACTION! GO KICK SOME NOMU ASS GRAND TORINO!!

Iida nooo he's so tunneled vision for vengeance...

Endeavor is a terrible parent, but dammit he's good at his job as a hero, minus the being nice part

I still don't really see how tensei wasn't a good hero, I mean from what I could tell he was definitely living up to the title of "hero". No matter, DEKU ZOOMING IN TO SAVE THE DAY!! YEAH SHOTO ALSO COMING IN TO SAVE SOME ASS!!!

EW OH GOD I FORGOT ABOUT CLOSE UP ON THE LICKING EW

God this whole fight is just amazing, this is where deku and shoto become actual friends and iida gets some sense into him

Shoto and iida bonding over their shared past narrowed tunnel vision out of absolute resentment

"BECOME THE HERO HE WANTED YOU TO BE" now look whose giving the inspirational words! Shoto has learned a lot from deku lol

YEAH GET UP IIDA BACK ON YOUR FEET SOLDIER GO SAVE SHOTO FROM GETTING AMPUTATED! Oh and a cool kick flip too!

iida as the legs, deku as the arms, and shoto as the body, love these 3

Ya know, I realized that they still kinda treat nomus as if they're actually human, like they still arrest them and try to talk to ee. Which ig makes sense since there are mutant quirks and anyone can look like anything, so the whole reveal that nomus aren't human - well not anymore at least - would be a much bigger deal, even though it is kinda obvious

"My friend might be in danger" THE FIRST TIME HE SAYS THEY'RE FRIENDS YESSS

Ok damn giving some vocals onto endeavor's song aight then

Gotta appreciate that the pro heroes, adults, are being responsible and making sure the interns, teenagers, are safe. Yeah they're hero students, but they're still kids

"Our fight against the hero killer probably only took about 10 minutes" that was only 10 minutes??? Damn time feels a lot different when kicking ass huh

OH SHIT FLYING NOMU! OH SHIT DEKU!! OH GROSS THE TONGUE!!! OH FUCK STAIN TO THE RESCUE??

Oh boy stain's final speech... And also creepy ass face reveal, never noticed he doesn't actually have a nose

Oh lol it's the dog man cop www woof

I get that they're trying to avoid the abuse of quirks (which feels a lil dumb considering what happens in the future) but also, iida was going to die along with that other pro hero, like what else were they going to do?? They're kids yes, but the fact that they are means that using their quirks was literally the only thing they could do. Also mentioning shoto's dad like that really didn't feel necessary jeez

Lmao yeah shoto, the dog cop would've started with that

"Was that a boy~" LMAO GUNHEAD

Hhhh oh boy, these children need therapy I swear. But thank god for shoto breaking the ice, the hand crusher www

Oh fuckkk stain inadvertently helped shigaraki get what he wanted, which I think might've not been wat he meant to do but oh well

Now time to see everyone else's internship!

Bakugo my dude you are not cut out in making the public feel safe ya dumbass. Uraraka learning hand to hand combat! Poor Momo and kendo, barely get to do actual heroing. Tho the same could be said for kirishima and tetsutetsu, but at least it's an activity that's actually helping the community. But hey at least jirou seems to be actually doing some action pact heroing

Froppy your sense of cute is very different from everyone else's, including mine www

LMAO BAKUGO'S HAIR 😂

Denki thinking stain was cool, another lil tid bit of info in the suspecting he is the UA traitor

Eyy spiderman doing what he's good at! But deku's learned a few new tricks too- oop and he slips lol

WHY IS MINETA STILL HERE?? HE IS A HAZARD TO PRIVACY I SWEAR

Ah time to drop a info bomb. First time we actually get conformation and explanation on nomus, one for all, and all for one

Looking back on all this, I realized just exactly how much pressure there is on deku, like he's being entrusted to defeat this who-knows-how-old villain and he's just 15 like boi

Ah yes, Mt. Lady and Midnight interaction. Mineta fuck off

Huh didn't realize that the ranking thing was actually from midterms, thought that was the actual ranking of the written test. Lmao gotta love momo, we all need that smart friend in our life. Oh I did not notice this lil kiribaku interaction >.> tho that's a good way to make him tutor you www

Monoma has a really interesting way to show his concern for the safety of his people when it comes to the danger 1A attracts, like he said it in a way to insult them but he was also pointing out how if they keep this up they'll be endangering those around them. But they can't really help it tho, so he can't be mad at them for that, just his feelings of rivalry getting in the way as usual

Bakugo at it again with his anger issues and overachieving complex (is that what you call it)

Written exam monologue~

LMAO NEZU JUST CHILLING IN AIZAWA'S SCARF THAT'S ADORABLE

Teaching them that retreating is a valid option is really important, because they gotta learn that retreating can be used as a good strategy to get reinforcements when they're in a fight they can't win. A lesson bakugo really needs to learn

Kiri & Sato vs Cementos. Gotta say, they weren't very smart on how'd they deal with cementos. Like, he clearly has the advantage in this scenario

Tsu & Tokoyami vs Ectoplasm. THE HYBRID DUO!! Bird man and frog girl! "Tho apparently after a 2nd or 3rd song in karaoke, that number goes up.." LMAO WHAT I NEVER NOTICED THAT. Huh, I always thought tokoyami could do the whole fusing with dark shadow the whole time, or maybe that's my gold fish memory failing me. Oh hey! Tsu did actually ate the handcuffs, like it was shown for just a short second. Lmao gotta love dark shadow's personality

Iida & Ojiro vs Power Loader. LMAO OJIRO RIDING IIDA I CAN'T😭 and iida basically being a beyblade and yeeting him too www

Shoto & Momo vs Aizawa. Dawww momo... Her insecurities and doubt be hitting her, damn that's a mood. Oof, yeah aizawa has a point, shoto need to learn better communication with his partner and momo's gotta learn to trust herself again; not comparing herself to someone completely different. YASSS GO QUEEN!! SHOW EM WHAT YOU'RE MADE OF!!! Lmao, shoto no she's just tearing up a lil, she's not sick

Uraraka & Aoyama vs 13. PFFT I DIDN'T REALIZE AOYAMA MADE A PUN. Ah yes, the moment uraraka realized her feelings, thanks sparkle man. "I'm a mini battle hero" lol yes you are

Mina & Denki vs Nezu. God those 2 didn't stood a chance, like what were the teachers expecting. BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CASUALLY MENTION NEZU'S BACKSTORY LIKE THAT😭

Jirou & Koda vs Present Mic. OH DAMN THAT IS LOUD, RIP MY EARS. As much as koda's charades were funny, would've been nice to see him doing like JSL or something, like would be in character and some neat representation, oh well this is why we have headcanons. Hey, just cuz koda can speak with animals doesn't mean he has to like all of them

Hagakure & Shoji vs Snipe. Still find it fucking hilarious that this man's quirk is the power of glock, like it's not even an mutation, he just carries a gun. "YOU'RE A STUDENT I RESPECT WOMEN" LMAO SNIPE 😂😭 AS HE SHOULD

Sero & Mineta vs Midnight. I said it before and I'll say it again, why tf is mineta even here, he is a menace and a danger to the safety of the girls, like bruh. If he's gonna be in UA at least show him getting into detention for his behavior. Huh, lil bastard finally gets what being a hero is about, tho he still has a long way to go on the character development, like idk respecting boundaries

HOOO BOY IT'S THE BIG ONE NOW LETS GO

Deku & Bakugo vs All Might. THE MAIN COURSE HAS COME. God dammit bakugo, please I get you wanna win but you can't beat all might, for fuck sake get it in ur head and stop thinking with your ego. Hold up, why does a building have denki's name lmao??? BAHAHA LOL DEKU PUNCHING HIM, BAKUGO DESERVED IT. You said it all might, these 2 really need some counciling like boi. OOF HOW ARE THEY BOTH STILL ALIVE LIKE THAT LOOKED LIKE IT COULD'VE KILLED THEM?! Bakugo is someone that wins the way he wants to win no matter what, and deku is someone that just helps people even if they don't ask for it, this is just who they are. This is why they clash a lot, and a few other reasons. Tho they'll learn to have some equal footing, some day

LMAO deku with his ass up, and damn bakugo looks so peaceful asleep tf??

IT'S FUCKING DABI, hello missing todoroki child (started as a theory and is now confirmed, thanks spoilers) tho gotta say his voice isn't as deep as I remember it

Shopping montage✨ omg mineta PLEASE, WHO INVITED HIM??

Jeez shigiraki's theme song thing is creepy as hell. OH FUCK IT'S THAT CREEPY SMILE HHHH

Hol up it's only been 3 months since class started??? Damn, feels a bit short

#sharing my brain juice #bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #fandom talks #acessment

[tarobytez]

disability in the Six Of Crows Duology; an analysis of Kaz Brekker, Wylan Van Eck, and the fandom’s treatment of them.

****Note: I originally wrote this for a tiktok series, which im still going to do, but i wanted to post here as well bc tumblr is major contributor to what im going to talk about

CW: ableism, filicide, abuse

In the Six of Crows duology, Leigh Bardugo delicately subverts and melds harmful disability tropes into her narrative, unpacking them in a way that I, as a disabled person, found immensely refreshing and…. just brilliant. 

But what did you all do with that? Well, you fucked it up. Instead of critically looking at the characters, y’all just chose to be ableist. 

For the next few videos paragraphs im going to unpack disability theory (largely the stuff surrounding media, for obvious reasons) and how it relates to Six Of Crows and the characterization of Kaz Brekker and Wylan Van Eck, then how, despite their brilliant writing, y’all completely overlooked the actual text and continuously revert them to ableist cariactures.

Disclaimer: 1. Shocker - i am disabled. I have also extensively researched disability theory and am very active in the disabled community. Basically, I know my shit. 2. im going to be mad in these videos this analysis. Because the way y’all have been acting has been going on for a long ass time and im fuckin sick of it. I don’t give a shit about non-disabled feelings, die mad

Firstly, I’m going to discuss Kaz, his play on the stereotypical “mean cripple” trope and how Bardugo subverts it, his cane, and disabled rage. Then, I am going to discuss Wylan, the “inspiration porn” stereotype, caregivers / parents, and the social model of disability. Finally, I will then explain the problems in the fandom from my perspective as a disabled person, largely when it comes to wylan, bc yall cant leave that boy tf alone.

Kaz Brekker

Think of a character who uses a cane (obviously not Kaz). Now, are they evil, dubiously moral, or just an asshole in general? Because nearly example I can think of is: whether it be Lots’O from Toy Story, Lucius Malfoy, or even Scrooge and Mr.Gold from Once Upon A Time all have canes (the last two even having their canes appear less and less as they become better people)

The mean/evil cripple trope is far more common than you would think. Villains with different bodies are confined to the role of “evil”. To quote TV Tropes, who I think did a brilliant job on explaining it “The first is rooted in eugenics-based ideas linking disability or other physical deformities with a "natural" predisposition towards madness, criminality, vice, etc. The Rule of Symbolism is often at work here, since a "crippled" body can be used to represent a "crippled" soul — and indeed, a disabled villain is usually put in contrast to a morally upright and physically "perfect" hero. Whether consciously on the part of the writer or not, this can reinforce cultural ideas of disability making a person inherently inferior or negative, much in the same way the Sissy Villain or Depraved Homosexual trope associate sexual and gender nonconformity with evil. ”

Our introduction to Kaz affirms this notion of him being bad or morally bankrupt, with “Kaz Brekker didn’t need a reason”, etc. This mythologized version of himself, the “bastard of the barrel” actively fed into this misconception. But, as we the audience are privy to his inner thoughts, know that he is just a teenager like every other Crow. He is complex, his disability isn’t this tragic backstory, he just fell off a roof. It’s not his main motivation, nor does he curse revenge for making him a cripple - it is just another part of who he is. 

His cane (though the shows version fills me with rage but-) is an extension of Kaz - he fights with it, but it has a purpose. Another common thing in media is for canes to be simply accessories, but while Kaz’ cane is fashionable, it has purpose.

The quote “There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken.” is so fucking powerful. Kaz does not want nor need a cure - its said in Crooked Kingdom that his leg could most likely be healed, but he chooses not to. Abled-bodied people tend to dismiss this thought as Kaz being stubborn but it shows a reality of acceptance of his disability that is just, so refreshing.

In chapter 22 of SOC, we see disabled rage done right - when he is called a cripple by the Fjerdan inmate, Kaz is pissed - the important detail being that he is pissed at the Fjerdan, at society for ableism, not blaming it on being disabled or wishing he could be normal. He takes action, dislocating the asshole’s shoulder and proving to him, and to a lesser extent, himself, that he is just as capable as anyone else, not in spite of, but because he is disabled. And that is the point of Kaz, harking back to the line that “there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken”. 

I cried on numerous occasions while reading the SOC duology, but the parts I highlighted in this section especially so. I, as many other disabled people do, have had a long and tumultuous relationship with our disability/es, and for many still struggle. But Kaz Brekker gave me an empowered disabled character who accepts themselves, and that means the world to me. 

Keeping that in mind, I hope you can understand why it hurts so much to disabled people when you either erase Kaz’s disability (whether through cosplay or fanfiction), or portray him as a “broken boy uwu”, especially implying that he would want a cure. That flies in the face of canon and is inherently fucking ableist. (if u think im mad wait until the next section)

Next, we have Wylan.  

Oh fucking boy. 

I love Wylan so fucking much, and y’all just do not seem to understand his character? Like at all? Since this is disability-centric, I’m not going to discuss how the intersection of his queerness also contributes to these issues, but trust me when I say it’s a contributing factor to what i'm going to say.

Wylan, motherfucking Van Eck. If you ableist pricks don’t take ur fucking hands off him right now im going to fight you. I see Wylan as a subversion another, and in my opinion more insidious stereotype pf disabled people - inspiration porn.

Cara Liebowitz in a 2015 article on the blog The Body Is Not An Apology explains in greater detail how inspiration porn is impactful in real life, but media is a major contributing factor to this reality. The technical definition is “the portrayal of people with disabilities as inspirational solely or in part on the basis of their disability” - but that does not cover it fully. 

Inspiration porn does lasting damage on the disabled community as it implies that disability is a negative that you need to “overcome” or “triumph” instead of something one can feel proud of. It exploits disabled people for the development of non-disabled people, and in media often the white male protagonist. Framing disability as inherently negative perpetuates ideals of eugenics and cures - see Autism $peaks’ “I Am Autism” ad. Inspiration porn is also incredibly patronizing as it implies that we cannot take care of ourselves, or do things like non-disabled people do. Because i stg some of you tend to think that we just sit around all day wishing we weren’t disabled. 

Another important theory ideal that is necessary when thinking about Wylan is the experience of feeling like a burden simply for needing help or accommodations. This is especially true when it comes to familial relationships, and internalized ableism.

The rhetoric that Wylan’s father drilled into his head, that he is “defective”, “a mistake”, and “needs to be corrected”, that he (Jan) was “cursed with a moron for a child” is a long held belief that disabled people hear relentlessly. And while many see Van Eck’s attempted murder of Wylan as “preposturous” and overall something that you would never think happens today - filicide (a parent murdering their child) is more common than you would like to believe. Without even mentioning the countless and often unreported deaths of disabled people due to lack of / insufficient / neglectful medical care, in a study on children who died from the result of household abuse, 40 of 42 of them (95%) were diagnosed with disabilities. Van Eck is not some caricature of ableist ideals - he is a real reflection on how many people and family members view disability. 

Circling back to how Wylan unpacks the inspiration porn trope - he is 3 dimensional, he is not only used to develop the other characters, he is just *chefs kiss* Leigh, imo, put so much love and care into the creation of Wylan and his story and character growth that is representative of a larger feeling in the disabled community. 

That being said, what you non-disabled motherfuckers have done to him.

The “haha Wylan can’t read” jokes aren’t and were not funny. Y’all literally boiled down everything Wylan is to him being dyslexic. And it’s like,,,, the only thing you can say about him. You ignore every other part of him other than his disability, and then mock him for it. There’s so much you can say about Wylan - simping for Jesper, being band kid and playing the fuckin flute, literally anything else. But no, you just chose to mock his disability, excellent fucking job!

Next up on “ableds stfu” - infantilization! y’all are so fucking condescending to Wylan, and treat him like a fucking toddler. And while partly it is due to his sexuality i think a larger portion is him being disabled. Its in the same vein of people who think that Wylan and Jesper are romantically one sided, and that Jesper only kind of liked Wylan, despite the canon evidence of him loving Wylan just as much. You all view him as a “smol bean”, who needs protecting, and care, when Wylan is the opposite of that. He is a fucking demolitions expert who suggested waking up sleeping men to kill them - what about that says “uwu”. You are treating Wylan as a burden to Jesper and the other Crows when he is an immensely valuable, fully autonomous disabled person - you all just view him as damaged. 

And before I get a comment saying that “uhhh Wylan isn’t real why do you care” while Wylan may not be real, how you all view him and treat him has real fucking impacts and informs how you treat people like me. If someone called me an “uwu baby boy” they’d get a fist square in the fucking jaw. Fiction informs how we perceive the world and y’all are making it super fucking clear how you see disabled people. 

Finally, I wanted to talk about how the social model of disability is portrayed through Wylan. For those who are unaware, the social model of disability contrasts the medical model, that views the disability itself as the problem, that needs to be cured, whereas the social model essentially boils down to creating an accommodating society, where disability acceptance and pride is the goal. And we see this with Wylan - he is able to manage his father’s estate, with Jesper’s assistance to help him read documents. And this is not out of pity or charity, but an act of love. It is not portrayed as this almighty act for Jesper to play saviour, just a given, which is incredibly important to show, especially for someone who has been abused by family for his disability like Wylan, that he is accepted. 

Yet, I still see people hold up Jesper on a pedestal for “putting up with” Wylan, as if loving a disabled person deserves a fucking pat on the back. It’s genuinely exhausting trying to engage with a work I love so much with a fandom that thinks so little of me and my community. It fucking shows. 

Overall, Leigh Bardugo as a disabled person wrote two incredibly meticulous and empowered disabled characters, and due to either lack of reading comprehension, ableism, or a quirky mix of both, the fandom has ignored canon and the experiences of disabled people for…. shits and giggles i guess. And yes, there are issues with the Grishaverse and disability representation - while I haven’t finished them yet so I do not have an opinion on it, people have been discussing issues in the KOS duology with ableist ideals. This mini series was no way indicative of the entire disabled experience, nor does it represent my entire view on the representation as a whole. These things need to be met critically in our community, and talked about with disabled voices at the forefront. For example, the limited perspective we get of Wylan and Kaz being both white men, does not account for a large portion of the disabled community and the intersection of multiple identities.

All-in-all, Critique media, but do not forget to also critique fandom spaces. Alternatively, just shut the fuck up :)

happy fucking disability pride month, ig

#soc #six of crows #kaz brekker #soc kaz #kaz talk tag #kanej #grisha #grishaverse #ketterdam #leigh bardugo #bardugo #crooked kingdom #ck #wylan #wylan van sunshine #wylan supremacy #jesper x wylan #wesper #jesper fahey #shadow and bone #wylan van eck #jan van eck #ableism #ableist bullshit #ableist slurs #disability #disability pride month #i will punch you in the face #el oh el #laugh out loud

[baeshijima]

𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫!𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫!𝐲/𝐧

MASTERLIST

now, childe as a general streamer,,, he’s a whale in every sense of the word 

…

poggers—

so childe as a streamer in general would be one word ;

✨chaotic✨

he would definitely be a variety streamer, but more so for games !!

especially pvp and/or pve games

competitive meta mf—

probably plays LoL, overwatch, apex legends, valorant and minecraft

don’t question the minecraft 

he likes mining but has a personal vendetta against the creepers bc once they blew up his mansion 

yes, a mansion

ask any of his community and they’ll tell u he spent a full-blown month and a half playing just minecraft to build it, only for it to go down just like that ;-; 

his chat loved it tho <//3

he’s played honkai too !! mainly for the pve and grinding bc he’s a whale but uh,,, shhh

his community,,, his community are just a bunch of trolls at this point i cant even lie

they just KEKW, SADGE & COPIUM spam everything and the newer viewers get intimidated until they realise he deserves them all HJGKJHF

especially when he starts getting annoyed by the game,,, his reactions are too good to pass up on gn

typically when he does mario kart streams 👩‍🦯 that shit’s wild when it happens oh my

when he falls in rainbow road 🤡 

and especially bc he has his webcam on, his viewers just see him internally dying or wanting to scream

also gets passive aggressive 

shit talks everything and everyone when in that mood <//3

for what’s left of his dignity i won’t disclose what happens

definitely gets jebaited a lot too <//3 unfortunately he’s too easy for his chat ;-;

another mf with a massive community except he has a lot of friends (sorry not sorry albedo)

ppl have a love-hate relationship with him tbh; u either love him or hate him

no inbetween

unless u show ur love through bullying him then go off ig

his discord server, twt + yt are also really big too !! also verified on insta 

also !!

he has lots of plushies :(( esp whale plushies from his community bc he’s the biggest whale they know <//3

but if u look at his setup, there’s a mini whale plushie on the top of his main monitor (he has 3), one big one (like,,, up to his chin) behind him, a smol on the top of his chair so u can see it above his head, and just more off screen HKJSDHL

they asked for a room tour once and half of it was just whale plushies

the rest were LED lights + shelves of merch & gifts from his community !!

he even has some fanmail (actual wholesome ones that aren’t cursed) pinned on a board too 🥺

also has an ensuite—

when he was eating on stream one time, his chat was sent into an absolute outrage

u know why?

bc he was eating noodles with a fork

bby ;-;

so sometimes he’ll get sent those beginner chopsticks with the finger guides to help him 👩‍🦯

he’s actually made sure to eat with them on stream tho bc he was sent one with a narwhal on top and he thinks it’s cute JHGJKH

nOW ONTO THIS MAN BEING WHIPPED FOR U AS A GENSHIN STREAMER !!!!

herkekle

now, his (also) AR56 ass has been playing since genshin first came out

an og if u will

this man,,, he’s been in love with u even before the game’s official release 🐥

not only were u in the promotional art and trailers, but he was also one of the beta testers so he got to try out ur character first hand in the early stages !!

and when i say he fell hard for u,

i mean it 

when the game wasn’t released publicly yet, he wasn’t allowed to disclose any information and ngl, it killed him that he couldn’t talk abt u :((

so all he could do was say this upcoming was really nice so far and subtly brag abt u to everyone JHGKJSDFHLK

when the official ads & promotional art were finally released 🥺🥺 when i tell u he immediately went live talking abt the game and u HKGJHFDK

he didn’t care that he streamed at an ungodly hour bc he’s been waiting for the reveal for so long he needs to let everyone know </3

he retweeted everything from their official twt straightaway, made a yt video based off his spontaneous stream promoting the game + pinged his entire server abt it

yes

his nearly 200k server all got pinged abt this one game bc he’s in love with a character from it

and he has no regrets abt it <33

the day the game was available for download, he stREAMED THE ENTIRE DOWNLOAD PROCESS

while he and his chat were waiting, they decided to watch the trailers and character showcases to get a feel for the game, and played some mario kart to pass the time !!

as soon as the game loaded, he threw mario kart behind him and went on 🐥

he typed his name (ajax) for the when he chose aether and literally everyone was appreciating the aesthetics HKJFS

but childe,,, he was waiting for it to be over so he could see u ;-;

he appreciated the aesthetics, fighting mechanics & voice acting a lot tho !!

now he had gotten through all the tutorials, got all the chests he could he was finally in mond

and there u were 🥺 after the dvalin encounter u arrived before kaeya did

and boy did he show u off sm to his viewers HKJHKLF

they knew he was down bad before but now?? they know it’s hopeless to save him and if he ever falls out of love that’s when the world ends

luckily that’ll never happen tho <33

but he took !! so many !! screenshots !!

oh, and did i mention he changed his wallpapers to u? and his twt + discord pfps are also some very aesthetic screenshots of u from that first scene ;-;

he just appreciates u sm okay 🥺

he even clutched his chest where his heart is and sunk down his chair when he heard u speak 😩

his chat just spammed his downbad + y/nlove + SHRIMP emotes and he accepted them all with grace <33

now when he unlocks the wishing feature,,, u already know he’s wishing for u as soon as possible

ur in the standard banner so ur always there which he appreciates but he would’ve wanted u to be limited so he can rub it in ppl’s faces ;-;

and since it was the first release rewards, he had tons of wishes right off the bat !!

he was gonna roll for venti after he gets u bc,,, well does he need a reason??

also he doesn’t do well with archer characters in general ;;; but if ur an archer then ur obv an exception sooo

bUT he got a 5 star in his first 20 pulls !!

tho it was diluc 👩‍🦯

while he was happy bc he got an incredibly meta character right off the bat,

he wasn’t interested in diluc,,, (even now his diluc is barely looked after, and only used for spiral abyss, *sweats*)

the next 5 star he got was around the 60 mark, and he got a weapon,,,

i mean,,, he got the weapon that was most suited for u so that’s smth at least (ˉ▽ˉ；)

after he used all his remaining primos and fates, he finally got u 🥺

he just went “fuck the storyline” and immediately put u in his party and just

admired u as a whole 

went through all the voice lines available, ur character story, ur idle animations (he had a heart attack from u and his chat clipped it) and took many, many screenshots 

his favourite voice lines would have to be the night + about us + (y/n)’s hobbies

and then he equipped u with ur weapon and damnnn did u look so good with it 😩

he changed u to be his avatar, with his signature as :

“(y/n)’s whale <3”

and now the whaling process begins 👩‍🦯

after at least £2k, he got u to c6, along with at least 1 copy of all the standard 5 stars,,

then he went for venti’s banner—

his chat were just too focused on how he’s gonna play u to even think of anything else tbh HKJAH

with ur kit, u were honestly seen to be a dps or even a sub dps if ppl don’t want u on the field all the time

so definitely a perfect character for mr meta strimmer tartaglia (his twitch name btw ;;; childe is just smth he prefers his community to call him as but they also call him ajax too HKJSD) here

so he went through the archon quests with u as his carry and i won’t lie, ur name card is smth he has printed and framed behind him after he got it 🥺

he later finds out ur part of the fatui in the liyue archon quest tho and has to fight u with,,,

well, u ;;;

he finds it hot tho so it’s okay—

i won’t lie tho, his zhongli after he got him is his second strongest after u

he just builds all his characters in the most broken way he can so he can show his viewers that everyone can be a dps in their own right, not just the ones meant to be since there’s no right or wrong in this game !!

but now ur weapon is r5, ur lvl 90 and u have lvl 20 5 star artifacts that make u the most broken (y/n) seen

ppl who co op with him are honestly baffled,,, especially when the feature of them being able to view other players’ character stats become available,,,

u with ur nearly 3k atk,,,

he’s hit over 600k with u tho and he’ll always flex that

no one can top him as a (y/n) main and that’s honestly just a fact at this point 😩

when he saw that the dating sim hangouts was official, his immediate and iconic response was simply ;

“so when will (y/n) become a dateable, huh 🤨”

to this day he’s still waiting to be able to date u in-game <//3

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact fluff #genshin impact childe #genshin childe #childe #childe x reader #genshin childe x reader #genshin impact childe x reader #childe headcanons #childe scenarios #childe fluff #hsdkjfhklsdfs childe pls come hom on main ;-; #streaming dreams

[bibbawrites]

Don’t Mention This To Anyone - Alive!Luke Patterson x Reader (SMUT)

Request: Hi can u do a luke x reader smut with an enemies to lovers storyline? Maybe they’re at a party and they’re playing truth or dare and luke and the reader get dared to play too hot to handle and later on at the party they get drunk and hook up? // can you do rough sex with luke?!! // Can u do a luke x reader enemies to lovers smut? //  Would you make a Luke and Y/N smut and just make it whatever you want but super smutty?

Word Count: 2163 words

Summary: Your best friend Julie invites you and Flynn to come over to hang out with her bandmates, and a game of too hot to handle ends up making you re-evaluate your relationship with Luke Patterson

Warnings: swearing, mention of underage drinking, unprotected sex, choking, praise kink, dirty talk, grinding/groping

A/N: hopefully this makes sense, i’m editing it half asleep lol  i’ve also put together a masterlist which you can find here anyways hope you enjoy :) 

You should have said no when Julie batted her eyes and asked you if you wanted to come hang out with her bandmates after school one Friday night. 

You should have said no when she used alcohol as a bribing tactic to get you to come. 

You should have made up an excuse not to go. 

Don’t get the wrong impression, you loved Alex and Reggie. The two boys had become close friends of yours since the day Julie first introduced them to you and Flynn. 

It was Luke Patterson that you had an issue with. The lead guitarist of Julie and the Phantoms and the lead pain in your ass since the minute you met. 

If you had said no to coming you wouldn’t have been in this situation. 

Staring down at the bottle on the floor after you drunkenly agreed to a game of Too Hot to Handle, watching as the bottle slowly stopped and pointed at the one person you were praying it wouldn’t. 

Luke fucking Patterson. 

“Oh fuck no.” You exclaimed loudly. Luke shook his head. 

“No way. Not doing it.” He said, his tone matching yours. 

“You have to, the bottle chose you.” Reggie grinned. You rolled your eyes. 

“The bottle doesn’t know what it’s doing.” You spat. 

“It’s simple, if you don’t want to do it that bad just give in straight away.” Flynn raised an eyebrow, looking between yourself and Luke. 

“I’m not a quitter, Y/L/N can give up.” Luke said. Your eyes narrowed. 

“What makes you think I’m a quitter Patterson.” You stared at the boy across from you, venom in your eyes. 

“There’s only one way to settle this then.” Julie spoke up after a moment of silence. 

“Play the fucking game.” Alex finished, his head resting on Willie’s shoulder. 

You rolled your eyes, standing up and making your way over to Luke. You knelt down in front of him, glaring at him. 

“I still hate your fucking guts.” You told him. He smirked. 

“The feeling’s mutual princess.” His tone was condescending. 

You placed your hand on his thigh, leaning in and sucking on his neck. He scoffed. 

“Is that all you’ve got Y/L/N?” He teased. 

You pulled away, glaring at him again before moving your hand up his thigh, getting dangerously close to his crotch, your eyes never leaving his. He didn’t even bat an eyelid. 

You held back a scowl, frustrated that Luke was so good at this game. Standing up you sat down in his lap, grinding your ass into his dick. You grabbed his hand and placed it onto one of your boobs, and your friends whistled at the scene. 

Luke fake yawned and this time you couldn’t help but scowl. 

“Are you fucking kidding? Nothing? Maybe Carrie is right and you are in love with Reggie.” You said, and Reggie choked on his drink. 

“Guess you’re not as seductive as you thought, sweetheart.” Luke teased, ignoring the comment about Reggie. You moved again so that you were straddling his hips, and you could feel that his dick was slightly hard in his pants. Motivated by this you started rocking back and forth, trying to ignore the feelings of pleasure shooting through your body. 

“I feel like we shouldn’t be watching this.” Flynn joked, covering Julie’s eyes with one hand and Reggie’s with her other.

“You guys were the ones who wanted this.” You reminded them, stopping and looking Luke in the eyes. You had always known that Luke was an attractive guy, his arrogance often outshining his good looks, but up close he was stunning. You hesitated and he smiled, glancing down at your lips. Your heart started to race and you mentally kicked yourself. 

This was Luke Patterson, the same boy who you had hated ever since Julie had first introduced him to you. 

The boy who was so self centered he couldn’t handle things not being about him.

The boy who you fought with every single time you saw him. 

He lent closer and you froze. Was he going to kiss you? 

“I- I give up.” You stuttered, jumping out of his lap and rushing back to your spot. 

“I knew you’d chicken out.” Luke sung, a smug look on his face. 

You were silent, and Luke’s cocky grin fell, concern flicking through his eyes for a brief moment. 

“Hey Julie, it’s getting late, everyone needs to go home.” Ray said, stepping into the studio and you stood up quickly, rushing to grab your bag as the others stood up slowly. 

“You sure you don’t wanna stay the night Y/N?” Julie asked as you flung your bag onto your back. You nodded.

“Yeah I’m sure, my mum would kill me.” You said, and she nodded understandingly. 

“Can I walk you home?” Luke blurted out, and everyone turned to look at him in shock. He shrugged. 

“What? I may hate her guts but I still don’t want her to be murdered on the way home.” He said, and you could have sworn you saw a slight blush on his cheeks.

“No it’s fine, my house is just around the corner, Alex or Reggie can walk me.” You replied, glancing at your two friends. 

“Yeah I can-” Reggie stopped, noticing the glare that Luke was shooting him. “Actually sorry Y/N, I really have to get home quickly before my parents realise I was gone.” 

“Alex?” You tried. The blond boy shook his head. 

“Sorry babe, Willie and I are heading in the complete opposite direction.” Alex shot you a sympathetic look. You sighed, turning your attention to Luke. 

“Fine, let’s go Patterson.” You said, giving in. 

Luke followed behind you as you left the garage and headed out onto the street, walking in silence for a few minutes before you decided to speak up.

“So what’s your motive?” You asked. Luke frowned.

“My what?” He asked.

“Why are you walking me home? You said yourself you hate my guts.” 

“Can’t I just be a good friend?” He tried. You rolled your eyes.

“We’re not friends.” You reminded him. He shrugged as you turned heading down your street.

“Okay.” He replied simply. You stopped in front of your house, spinning on your heels to look at him.

“So?” You questioned. He hesitated, his normally confident aura gone. He opened his mouth to speak but decided against it, instead taking a step towards you. You looked up, your eyes meeting his, and your heart skipped a beat when you noticed the lust in his eyes.

“Luke.” You muttered quietly, and suddenly your back was pressed against the front wall of your house, his lips on yours.

Your brain short circuited. No one had ever kissed you with that much passion before.

You kissed him back with just as much force, the lust and alcohol clouding your better judgement.

He pulled away to take a breath and you wordlessly grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him towards your front door. You reached into your bag to find your keys, Luke’s lips on your neck sucking hard enough that you were definitely going to have a few marks to cover in the morning. You got the door unlocked and you kicked it open, spinning around to capture Luke’s lips with your own again, kissing him as you dragged him into your house.

“Are your family home?” He questioned breathlessly as he pulled away. You nodded.

“Just mum.” You told him as you lead him up the stairs, him trailing behind you like a lost puppy. “But she doesn’t care if I bring people home to fuck as long as we’re safe.”

You reached your bedroom door and opened it, shoving Luke inside before shutting and locking the door behind you.

He roughly shoved you against the door, lips connecting once more in a passionate kiss full of tongues and roaming hands.

You kicked off your shoes and began to strip down, your lips never once leaving his, and he did he same. You briefly pulled apart for him to remove his shirt, but once it was off his lips were back on yours again.

“Fuck.” He groaned, as your naked bodies pressed against each other.

“Speaking of, can you please?” You teased, pushing off the wall and placing your hands on his shoulders, leading him to your bed.

You gave him a light shove so that he fell backwards, and you climbed on top of him, straddling his waist, almost moaning at the feeling of his hard dick slipping between your folds.

“God Y/L/N.” Luke groaned as you began to move your hips, grinding into his boner.

“Shut up.” You told him.

He flipped you over, pinning you against your bed, his hand coming up to grab at your neck, choking you slightly.

You moaned loudly, not even caring that your mother might hear. She’d know in the morning by the marks littering your body.

“You like that? You like it when I choke you?” Luke questioned, placing a bit more pressure on your neck but not enough to hurt you or constrict your airways. 

“Fuck, yes.” You moaned in response.

“Of course you do, you dirty little whore.” His words made you even wetter, hips bucking up for some kind of contact.

“Patterson please just fuck me.” You groaned. He smirked.

“If you say so.” He sat up, hands running down your sides, before hesitating slightly.

“Do you have...” He paused, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

“Are you clean?” You questioned. He nodded. “Me too. Just fuck me.”

“But what about-” He started.

“I’m on the pill.” You cut him off. “Please Luke.”

He smirked.

“I think you need to beg a bit more.” He teased. 

“Fuck me right now or you’ll be jerking off in the street alone.” You threatened.

“Jesus princess, no need to be so pushy.” He said as he lined up his dick with your hole, pushing in roughly causing you to gasp.

“Fuck.” You exclaimed. He barely gave you time to adjust before he was pounding into you again, causing the both of you to swear loudly.

“Again.” You stuttered out, and he obeyed, slamming into you again.

“That feels so good.” You groaned.

“Oh yeah?” He smirked, repeating his actions to see your reaction.

“Yes you cocky bastard.” You spat, and he grinned.

“Fuck you.” He said.

“Please.” You bit back. He grinned, before beginning to thrust hard, creating a rhythm. His hand went back to your throat again, pressing down causing you to moan loudly.

“Fuck if you keep this up I won’t last.” You groaned. He bit his lip as he continued to pound into you.

“Me neither.” He admitted. He sped up his pace, the room filled with the sounds of slapping skin and your breathless moans.

“Fuck, I’m close.” He said, and you felt the familiar feeling pooling in your stomach.

“Me too.” You said. He glanced at you, seemingly hesitant to say something.

“What?” You questioned.

He bit his lip.

“Could you... tell me that I’m doing good?” He questioned, somewhat shyly.

“You have a praise kink?” You asked.

“Maybe...” He replied quietly.

“God Luke this feels so good. You feel so good.” You moaned, smirking at his reaction.

“Okay yes, I have a praise kink.” He admitted, squeezing your throat slightly as a warning not to tease him. You gasped.

“Yes Luke. So good.” You praised, and he moaned slightly.

“I’m gonna cum.” He said between moans.

“Ugh yes, fill me with your hot cum like the good boy you are.” You moaned, and he came undone, hips stuttering as he came inside you. The feeling of his cum coating your insides was enough to set you off too, your walls clenching around him as you came hard.

“I hate you.” You moaned.

“I hate you more.” He replied breathily.

You rode out your highs together and he pulled out, flopping down next to you.

“Mind if I stay the night?” He asked softly. You hesitated.

“No, I don’t mind.” You eventually decided. You turned your head to look at the boy next to you, his hair stuck to his head with sweat, and you suddenly realised that maybe you didn’t hate Luke Patterson as much as you thought you did.

You forced yourself to get up and clean off in the bathroom before climbing back into bed still naked with Luke.

He snuggled into your side and you pressed a soft kiss to his head, an oddly intimate gesture to someone you had claimed to hate up until an hour or so ago.

“Goodnight Y/N.” Luke whispered softly, his voice full of sleep.

“Goodnight Luke.” You replied, and with that the two of you drifted off to sleep, until the next morning when a shout woke you from your slumber.

“Oh my god did you two fuck?” Alex’s voice startled you, and you groaned, pulling the covers up over your head.

You were never going to live this one down.

#luke patterson #luke patterson smut #luke patterson x reader #julie and the phantoms #julie and the phantoms smut #reader insert

[ukai-simp-services]

please can you write more nsfw kenma content? whatever you want omg and of course do it when u feel like it n u have time <3 love ur writing have a nice day

a/n: thanks for the request love!! i rlly hope this isn't too mediocre, i fr tried. enjoy <3

nasty

warnings: nsfw, cursing, humiliating, degrading, slight bdsm, name calling

  if there’s one thing you've learned about your boyfriend from the past year of dating him, it was that he tended to have a bit of a personality shift the moment he entered the ‘bedroom’. 

  many, including yourself, knew kenma as a more reserved individual. he didn't yell much, unless provoked - and he only really spoke up if he felt the situation called for it. to a normal acquaintance of kenma, he was just socially awkward and shy. 

  but those who truly knew him; being you and kuroo - you both knew kenma had a way of saying things. the guy simply had a lot on his mind, but he only chose to say the things that were relevant. he even seemed to have a bit of a temper at times, but he always meant well. 

  there’s one thing that only you got to know though, something that you'd like to think nobody else ever got to witness first hand. you saw a side to kenma that was reserved for you and only you. it was a feral; almost animalistic side. to put it more frankly, he was just straight up nasty. 

  lewd, vulgar, dirty - all words could be used to describe your ‘introverted’ boyfriend when he was in a sexual state of mind. he liked to own you in the bedroom, and sometimes even be owned. 

  three slow slaps were placed onto your clit, making your back arch in pleasure. kenma wouldn’t stop taunting you; wouldn't stop delaying your orgasm, and it almost had you in tears.

  “kenma, p-please. i need-”  

  “did i ask you what you needed? do you really think i fucking care?” a malicious look glistened in his eyes, eyes that were burning into yours. you knew by this look that it was his game and he would play however he wanted. 

  you bit your lip and nodded, submitting to his cruel game. he gave you a smirk in response, subtly letting you know he was proud of your obedience.

  without warning, kenma rutted two digits into your sloppy wet core; curling his fingers upwards to massage your insides. naturally, your back arched in response - tugging at the tight handcuffs that held you captive to the bed. kenma brought a hand to your cheeks, squishing them between his fingers.

  “hey, behave slut.” he spat down at you. 

  “s-sorry sir.” your cheeks flushed pink at the name kenma gave you.

  he chuckled at your state of submission, going to sit back on his knees as he continued his harsh pace inside your tight walls. his thumb found its home on your clit, rubbing hard circles into the flesh. you felt the familiar daze of an orgasm approaching you again - and you knew kenma felt it too. you weren't surprised when his two fingers left your core, but also disappointed in hopes that he would've just let you finish. yet, you kept your composure the best you could; no whining and no complaining. 

  your facade quickly fell when kenma stuck his two slick-covered fingers into his mouth, sticking out his tongue slightly to lap up the juices that had dripped down his palm. your eyes became hooded with lust, nipples hardening at the sight in front of you. kenma knew exactly what to do to make you weak and how to do it.

  “you taste amazing kitten, too bad it's not all about you tonight.” kenma teased in a low voice as his face inched closer to yours. 

  your cheeks heated up, cat-like yellow eyes bored into yours. you wanted nothing more than to reach your lips up to his and kiss him, tasting yourself on his tongue - and you almost did, but he quickly pulled away. 

  the taunting man leaned back to pull off the remaining boxers and sweats he wore, cock bouncing up and pressing against his lower abdomen. your eyes trailed over his slim - yet toned body. you almost drooled at the sight of him. he was never very girthy but he had quite a few inches on him to make up for it. 

  a small part of kenma became self-conscious at your gaze on his body, but the feral part of him wanted to shove his cock right into your gaping mouth with no remorse. though, he decided he'd much rather feel your walls tonight. with a firm grip on your plush thighs, your legs were forcibly pulled apart; cold air brushed over your wet folds. kenma began his teasing by rubbing the base of his cock against your clit, the action alone had you nursing your bottom lip between your teeth. 

  kenma noticed your subtle gesture and knew right away that you were holding back your moans - and you were well aware that would only prolong kenma’s torturous game. 

  the boy’s lust-filled eyes locked with yours the second he began grinding his dick down on your clit with more force and pressure. you tried to maintain the  sensual gaze locked between you two as best as you could, but the sensation from the friction had you gasping for air and your head tossing back. a mocking laugh from your boyfriend pulled you out of your daze; your head shooting up immediately at the noise. 

  “you're so fucking sensitive, my dick isn't even inside you yet and you’re already squirming for me.” he leaned in closer to your face, brought a hand to your right breast and tugged at its perked nipple with his thumb and his pointer finger; making you yelp in response. 

  “please kenma. please, i've been so fucking good.” you begged; tears forming at the rims of your eyes. kenma refused to let go of your nipple and his rough grinding hadn't ceased either. 

  “good girls don't act this desperate, but cockwhores do. and you will be treated exactly how you act, get that?” he squeezed the bud that remained squished in-between his fingers for affirmation.

  “y-yes, sorry sir. i won't do it again.” you let out a shaky breath and blinked away the tears that had formed from a mixture of frustration and pleasure. you loved this kind of foreplay with your boyfriend, but that didn't make it any less agonizing each time you engaged in it.

  kenma removed the tight grip of his fingers from your nipple and slowed his harsh humping in a response to your cooperating words; also beginning to line up his length with your entrance. 

  a simple “good.” was all he needed to say before he was slamming his cock inside your tight entrance all at once. he didn't even need to have a huge dick to make your cunt throb in both pain and pleasure; the initial force of his member being plunged within you had you screaming at the top of your lungs. he had managed to push the tip of his head all the way up to meet your cervix in just one single thrust. 

  you choked out a “kenma” ending it with a loud moan and he knew to keep going. he controlled the pace of his thrusts to be quick and hard, bruising the inside of your pussy with each snap of his hips. 

  “you're so fucking tight. can barely fit this big cock inside of you, huh?” kenma shamed you through gritted teeth. 

  you struggled to form words; as his cock was slamming against you in such a way that your brain felt like it was melting. 

  “answer when you're being spoken to, bitch.” kenma ceased all movement; pulling his cock out of you almost fully, only the head remained inside of you.

  you felt your core clench around the small amount of cock kenma had left inside you, it made you almost want to scream in his face.

  “y-yes, i can barely fit you inside of me, sir.” you licked your lips; dry from heavy breathing. you hoped to god that he would continue. 

  “good, that's good.” kenma spoke breathlessly; all this fucking around was really getting to him too. oh well, maybe if you weren't so disobedient he could just continue on and fuck you properly. with those final words, he pushed his length back into you all at once, a lewd squelching noise sounded from the action.

  kenma leaned his body forward, some strands of hair fell out of his low bun and lightly tickled your collarbones - you always thought he looked so attractive in this position. he rested one hand next to your head and the other one came up to your face. you gave him a puzzled look, thinking he was moving to cup your cheek. your mind was quickly changed when he brought his ring and middle finger to your lips, pressing against them to force an entrance. you obliged his actions, parting your lips slightly to let his slender fingers into your mouth. he was quick to push his long digits further down your tongue, practically touching the back of your throat. 

  you gagged at the sudden feeling of his finger pads pressing down on the area between the end of your tongue and beginning of your throat; the sensation had your mouth filling with saliva. it took you a second to adjust to the feeling of your mouth being so full of his lean fingers  - all while your cunt was being slammed into by an equally as slender member. 

  you knew kenma was getting impatient for you to begin sucking on his digits, you could tell by the narrowing of his golden eyes - and the last thing you wanted to do was to tick him off when you felt yourself getting so close to an orgasm. you easily complied; letting your tongue circle around his fingers with a slow, sensual rhythm. your eyes never left his, keeping your best poker face on as he slammed into your guts and you salivated on his fingers. 

  the sadistic man found himself growing weak at the sight of your lust-filled eyes and the feeling of your mouth around his fingers - he felt you begin sucking them further into your mouth. he kept on his dominant persona as best as he could, despite the aching feeling of an orgasm building in his stomach. 

  “you’re so dirty, sucking on my fingers like they're my cock.” his breathing had become noticeably rigged, but his eyes kept the same hooded, dazed-out look that they had from the start. 

  you moaned around his fingers in response, drool was now dripping down your chin as well as his hand. kenma almost pulled his fingers out from their current spot so he could hear you as he fucked you through an orgasm - but he decided he'd rather see you cum with his fingers in your mouth. 

  your breathing became irregular, as kenma’s fingers were restricting you from being able to inhale and exhale regularly. it was when he began pumping the digits in and out of your throat that you felt the coil in your stomach begin to break. 

  the jangle from handcuffs being tugged at was heard as your body began writhing under your boyfriend. your muffled moans vibrating around kenma’s skilled fingers gave him the signal that he needed to hear to fuck your cunt harder and faster than he already was. 

  “you're gonna cum, yeah? you're gonna milk my dick?” kenma felt himself slowly losing his own composure, he was gonna cum any minute now. 

  “mmfm yesh...” the words leaving your mouth were far from coherent, courtesy of kenma’s fingers. you soon found yourself doing exactly what he said, velvety walls gripping at his lean cock like a vice. your orgasm was violent, it ripped through you with such a force that kenma had to gently use his body to hold down yours. it hit you like a fucking wave, you had been denied of it for so long that it came crashing into you with no mercy. 

  you screaming around his fingers and yanking at the cold metal handcuffs around your wrists practically threw kenma into an orgasm of his own. although not as violent, his body twitched above you as he moaned loudly into your ear; the way he knew you liked it. 

  both of you rode out your orgasms together, bodies twitching and chests rising and falling rapidly. before flopping his body onto yours, kenma removed his long fingers from your mouth slowly; thick strings of spit attached to your lips were following after them. 

  “so hot...you're so hot.” kenma mumbled breathlessly before letting his chest fall on top of yours and his head falling into the crook of your neck.

  you chuckled, “so are you, very hot actually.” you lifted your palm up to meet the top of his head; softly smoothing his disheveled hair down. kenma’s softer personality was rising to the surface again and his sadistic side was fading along with the intense aftermath of your orgasm. 

  he mumbled a “nuh-uh.” into your skin, you argued his statement. 

  “’m tired y/n. do you think we can rest for a little bit before cleaning up?” kenma nuzzled his face deeper into your skin to further convince you. you laughed at how his breath tickled your skin and unintentionally wiggled under him. the action made the handcuffs still attached to your limbs jingle, reminding you that they were still there. 

  “i’ll rest with you as much as you want, as long as you get these damn cuffs off me first.” 

  kenma peeked up at your arms, nodding before reaching over to his nightstand to grab the small keys to the handcuffs.

  “deal.” 

#nasty kenma make my brain go brrr #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu!! #hq smut #kenma kozume #kenma kozume x reader #kenma x fem!reader #kenma x reader smut #kenma x reader #kenma kozume smau #kenma kozume smut #kenma smut #hq au #hq smau #haikyuu smau #haikyuu smut

[ijustwant2write]

Bad Boy-John Shelby x Reader

(GIF credit to @markshade​)

Requested by anonymous: ‘Hi do you think u can do a John Shelby imagine where they are dating and y/n is a good innocent girl but freaky with John and her parents want to Him over for dinner John wants to piss off her dad cause he’s not a fan of the blinders and does subtle things to annoy him like touching y/n at the end of the night when they are saying goodbye at his car they have a heated make out sesh and John knows her dad is looking through the window so spices it up a bit . ❤️’

Characters: John Shelby x Reader

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

(Y/L/N)=Your last name

Warnings: Smut from the start (unsafe sex!), dirty talk, swearing, arguing, mentions of violence and death, fluff

(A/N: Amelia and Henry are made up characters)

                                        *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I clamped my hand over my mouth tightly, struggling to keep in the whimpers and moans as John continuously thrusted into me. However, the boxes I was perched on were full of bottles of beer, causing them to clang against each other.We were in the stock room of the Garrison, luckily having the music, singing and loud chatter drowning out the noise we were creating. John’s hands gripped at the skin around my hips, that cocky smirk on his face that I loved so much. For some reason, an idea popped into my head, and in the state of euphoria I was in just made me say it out loud.

“John...” was all I managed to breath out at first.

“Fuck, I love it when you say my name. Say it again.” he instructed.

“I want you to meet my parents.”

He suddenly stopped, making me realise it wasn’t the best time to bring that up.“You what?”

We were both heavily breathing.“Sorry, I don’t know why I said that just then.”

He scoffed, sighing as he slid out of me.“Well, that’s finished with.”

“I’m sorry! They want to meet you. They know who you are, but they want to try and treat this like they did with my sister.”

“You sure you want that? Remember what you told me when they first found out about us?”

I rolled my eyes, hitching up my stocking as he did up his trousers.“It was their idea, not mine.”

“You don’t want me meeting them?”

“Of course I do, I just-” I caught him trying to hide a laugh, he was winding me up.“You’re such a little shit.”

He stood in between my legs again, hands on my thighs before I could push my skirt down.“Well, if I have been summoned by the Lord (Y/L/N)-”

“Oh my god,” I threw my head back as I laughed in frustration,“would you stop calling him that! I’m the same class as you.”

“What have I always said?”

I shrugged my shoulders, but knew what he was referring to.

“You were always meant to be a fucking princess, Princess (Y/N) of Birmingham.”

I laughed at him.“Oh shut up! Are you coming to dinner or not?”

“If you ask me nicely.”

“And how do I do that?”

“By finishing what we started.”

John and I had been together for a few months now, much to my parents dismay. It had started as a drunk one night stand; we were both at the Garrison, and seemingly chose each other for the night. However, when you’re young, poor and living in Small Heath, there aren’t a lot of places to go out, so me and my friends went to the Garrison all the time. This meant I also saw John again....and again....and again, and again. We slept we each other maybe three more times before wondering if this could become a thing; from there onwards, we found out more about each other, and he brought out a side of me I had been hiding, also wanting to release.

On the day of the dinner, I wanted to see John before he arrived. I lied to my mum, saying we had no bread (which I had hidden away), and practically running out of the house to ‘buy’ some. I told John what time to be at mine, also lying to make him leave earlier so I could meet him halfway. In the bakery, I threw the money onto the counter after picking up a loaf of bread, speedily walking away as I prayed I would run into John. Luck was on my side as I spotted him, already heading in the direction of my home.

“John!” I shouted, the whole street now looking at me as I sprinted past them. 

He whipped around at the noise, hand hovering over where his gun would be. When he saw me, he didn’t relax, wondering why I was yelling his name and running like a mad man.

“I’m so glad I caught you.” I struggled to say, out of breath.

“What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” he panicked.

“No, no I’m fine. I’m a terrible runner though.”

“Then why are you here?”

“Bread.” I said, holding up the loaf as evidence.“And also, to see you.”

“I was just leaving.”

“Yes, I can see that. I just wanted to go over some rules.”

“Rules? Oh come on (Y/N)-”

“No, listen to me.” I held up the bread instead of pointing my finger at him.“I love you. I always take your side for everything. We both know my parents don’t like this, but seeing as I am a grown woman, they don’t do anything to stop me. So just for today, we’re going to abide to their rules.”

He rolled his eyes.“Right, so I’ve got to be the uptight prat that your parents want you to be with?”

“They know what you’re like already, and even if they didn’t, they would be able to see through that act. Just let my dad be my dad.”

“If he says something fucking offensive, I’m not going to stay quiet!”

“Fine, then be political about it. Don’t shout at each other, try to make small talk, but no talking about guns, violence, killing-”

“Alright, are you going to go?”

“Sorry. I just want this to be easy. I hate seeing you stressed. I love you.”

He held my hand, starting to walk.“Yeah, yeah. Come on, I’ve got the car parked up in the garage.”

I hated that he hadn’t sent it back, but I understood why he was being like this. I was making him be someone he wasn’t. I loved John as a person, however, I couldn’t be dealing with a screaming match between him and my family.

“John, I do love you.” I said after a few minutes of walking.

“I know. I love you too.” he eventually smiled.“Just want you all to myself now, you know? We wouldn’t have to be dealing with this.”

“Soon darling. We’ll get that house soon enough. Oh, I’ve just remembered something else!”

“Rule number...I’ve lost count, maybe one hundred?”

“No inappropriate stuff. No touching, kissing, being sneaky, nothing!”

“That’s going to be incredibly hard. Especially with that dress.” 

Once we made it to my house, I gave him a quick kiss on the lips before getting out of the car. Opening the front door. I called out to my parents, hearing them reply from the front room. I told John to remove his coat whilst I rushed into the kitchen with the bread, carelessly chucking it on the side before getting back to him. I saw a hint of nerves in his eyes, though his pride covered it. Taking his hand in mine, I guided us to my family, surprised to see who was sitting with them.

“Amelia? What are you doing here? And with Henry?” I asked.

“Well, Henry would happen to be here with me because he’s my husband. I’m sure you remember being at the wedding.” she quipped.

“I don’t remember the boring days of my life. Not worth it.”

“(Y/N).” mum warned.

“Anyway,” I looked up at John,“I would like you to all meet John Shelby. We’ve been seeing each other for quite some time and-”

“We know who he is.” dad sighed, not even bothering to stand from his seat. 

“You’re the ones who invited him over. It would be nice of you to greet him properly.”

Dad stood slowly, making his way towards us, making me think he was getting up to shake John’s hand. Instead he just stopped, not looking either of us in the eye.

“I need a drink.”

He broke us apart by walking through us, mum timidly following. I felt like swearing and screaming. It was their idea. They wanted to meet him but then they were being like this. I sent an apologetic smile to John as we sat down.

“So,” I thought I would try and make conversation,“John, this is my sister Amelia and her husband Henry. She used to live here but she moved away a few years ago.”

“Had to find a better area, you know? Safer for the children we were planning for.” Amelia smugly smiled.

“Such a saint is my sister.”

“It’s like Mary and Joseph.” John chuckled, causing me to laugh.

“Well that would make you Judas and...and whoever he was with then, wouldn’t it?” Amelia desperately tried.

“Nice one Amelia. Don’t think too hard next time, yeah?”

Before she could snap back, mum called us to the dinner table. I realised we would all be squashed around it, seeing as only four people could usually fit there. I made sure John was sat beside me, Amelia and Henry opposite us and my parents at either head of the table. Our knees were almost touching we were that close. Dinner started silent, everyone tucking into the small meal. We were poor, we never had a lot to eat; which was why I was surprised that Amelia was here, there were now three more mouths to feed, not just John. But I knew why she was really here. Amelia had done what our parents wanted, found a good man who could provide her with the bare necessities and keep her out of trouble. They wanted me to reflect on who I was in love with, try to change my mind. Wasn’t going to happen.

“So what is it you actually do?” Henry asked. I was unsure if it was supposed to be malicious or whether he was actually curious.

“Work in the betting shop.” John answered.

“Yeah, but, you know, on the side.”

“Henry, we don’t want to get involved.” Amelia scolded him.

“Just because you’ve graced me with your presence, that doesn’t mean you’re on some sort of hit list.”

“No, but my sister is.”

“Amelia, shut up.” I snapped.

“No, she’s right.” John said, causing me to whip my head round to him. He went against my instructions, placing his hand on my thigh.“But I wouldn’t let anyone hurt my girl. They would be dead before they even thought about it.”

Although I had told him to not talk of such things or stoop to my families level, my heart melted at the (somewhat morbid) statement.

“Am I hearing this right?” mum laughed, but their was no humour behind it.

“Mum, try to not get upset.” Amelia held her hand.

Now it was my turn to laugh.“Oh my god.” Everyone looked at me, John was smirking whilst the others were frowning.“You’re such a hypocrite.”

“What?”

“You were sneaking out all the time, seeing different boys every weekend. What makes you so much better than me?”

“I’m not with a criminal.”

“All of you stop it!” dad exclaimed, slamming his fist down on the table.“And get your fucking hand off my daughter.”

Amelia tutted.“Henry would never-”

“You and Henry were fucking upstairs before dinner when he came round the first time!” I butted in.

“Sounds like a good time to me.” John mumbled under his breath.

“How dare you?!” mum was shocked.

“I knew this was a stupid idea. Get out, now!”

“With pleasure.” John stood, grabbing my hand.

I quickly left with him, grabbing the key off the counter and locking the door behind me. It made me laugh hearing their shouts of protest and banging on the door. We rushed to the car, scared that they would somehow break down the door. John leaned me back against it, hands sliding down the side of my body and gripping my arse. He knew what he was doing, especially since my family now had their faces pressed against the window.

“Well, that was...quick.” I giggled.

“Yeah, you’re not used to that.” John joked.

“You have to make it all about sex, don’t you?”

“(Y/N), I don’t give a fuck about what they think, and neither do you. As soon as I get this bit of business sorted with Tom and Arthur, I’m buying that house and you are moving in with me. Then we’ll get married straight away-”

“I hope this isn’t your proposal.”

“Don’t you worry, I’ve got something big planned for that.”

He leaned down to kiss me, gripping onto my arse firmly. As he deepened the kiss, adding tongues, he forced his knee between my legs, and I subconsciously started rubbing against it, only subtly. I made sure he stayed close by pulling him in by his coat. The neighbours would surely be watching, it was a small street, which would drive my parents insane. This only fuelled something in me, and I wanted to keep going. 

“I suggest we take this somewhere more private. Like, right now.” John breathlessly said.

I frantically nodded, and we both headed for opposite sides of the car, until I saw I still had the key in my hand. Hurriedly making my way back to the door, I ignored my family who had now managed to open the windows, screaming at me as I posted the key through the letter box. Running as fast as I could back to the car, I felt the adrenaline rush through me, giggling like a maniac at the thought of my parents catching me. Slamming the door shut as I jumped in the car, John floored it, and we looked like we escaped from an insane asylum as we laughed.

I stuck my head out of the car and screamed,“I fucking love you John Shelby!”

He pulled me back in by my dress, squeezing my thigh once I sat down.“I love you too, you fucking maniac.”

“I don’t think I’ll be allowed back there, you know.”

“Good thing you’re staying with me then.”

“You sure you’re ready for all of this?”

“I’ve been ready since I laid eyes on your face...and those tits, and that arse-”

“You make it seem like you’re only in it for my body.”

“Nah, that’s the ultimate bonus though. I already said it, but once you’re with me, I protect you and love you. You’re mine.”

“And you’re mine. Make sure to do your coat up before you get out the car, it’s a bit obvious down there.”

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[folkloreguk]

Mirror, Mirror (m)

A/N: I will never ever determine which body type the reader has, but I want every single one of you to know that it’s okay to feel empowered by the way your nude body looks, you’re absolutely beautiful and no size is a limit to how sexy you can be!!! You go queens!

words: ~5.4 (I’m sorry idk how to write short things anymore asdfgh)

genre: smut, optional bias (male) x reader (female), kinda fwb??, sexting

[H/N means “his name”]

There’s no feeling quite like the one of trying on your new clothes that just arrived in the mail and loving how they looked. Especially when said clothes were lingerie and you felt like you could conquer the world, even when you were just standing in front of your mirror at 7 pm after you had just stuffed your stomach with lasagna. And what better way to enjoy your happiness than to share it with your best friend?

In fact, you had two best friends. One, a girl who you could trust with your life, and two, a boy who knew all your deepest secrets. One of the central differences between the two was that you would never think about asking the former about his opinion on your new lingerie. You almost laughed at the mere thought while you went through your contacts list and selected your friend’s name and clicked ‘send’. “It’s new. How do I look?” you typed and sent quickly, before throwing your phone onto you bed. You were feeling sexy, but for the rest of the evening there was only one way you wanted to feel: Comfortable. So, you changed into your pajamas instead.

You wondered what she would say about your photo. Sending almost-nudes to your friend might have seemed odd, but for the two of you, it was a completely normal occurrence. You loved making sure you both felt beautiful and confident by complimenting each other. Happily, you walked back to your room after you had picked up some snacks in the kitchen. You grabbed your phone as you plopped down on your bed. While you stuffed a handful of crisps into your mouth, you unlocked your phone to check your messages. You had expected a text from your best girl friend, but instead you had received one from H/N, your best boy friend. Pure horror consumed you when you clicked on the chat and saw your almost-nude there. Sent at 7:01 pm. Seen at 7:05 pm. And worst of all, he had replied before you could have clarified the mistake.

H/N: Idk where this came from but…you’re hot

You: SORRY THIS WASN’T MEANT FOR YOU

H/N: Okay that kinda offends me…you have a bf and didn’t tell me???

You: NO OMG THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING HELP…it was for GF/N just for fun!!!

H/N: Ohhh…in that case…

You watched the dots signaling that he was still writing while you were still wondering how you would ever look at him without getting embarrassed from now on. It wasn’t like the two of you never talked about sex. In fact, he knew a lot about what you liked and didn’t like in the bedroom. Not because he had witnessed it. But thanks to multiple sleep overs with late-night conversations, when your lips became a little loose, you had discussed more sexual topics than you had ever dreamt of. Your cheeks were still feeling hot when you received another text.

H/N: How do I look?

Without missing a beat, he had attached a photo of him. Shirtless. His hair was disheveled, as if he had just removed his shirt, which he probably had. His sweatpants hung low on his hips as he stood in front of a mirror. He had tilted his head a little, showing off his jawline while he gazed at the camera with hooded eyes. You felt more embarrassed with every second you kept staring at his body.

H/N: OMG sorry this wasn’t for you!!!!!

Now you could only laugh at his stupid message.

You: Stop making fun of me!!

H/N: I’m trying to make you feel better!! Do I not get a compliment?

You: Thanks and you look great…can we please NEVER bring this up in the future?

H/N: Sure if that’s what you want…but if you ever need someone to rate your underwear again you know where to find me

~~~

And he really kept his promise. The next time you hung out, he was joking about everything but your little accident. You were thankful. But not mentioning the memory didn’t automatically delete it from your brain. And that’s where your newest problem begun.

You had never really looked at him in a sexual way before – sure, you thought he was handsome – but after than one damned picture he had sent you, you seemed to see him in a completely different light. There were no romantic feelings involved. But something felt profusely wrong about the way you thought about sex when he reached for a glass on the highest kitchen shelf and a small part of his abs was revealed. Or the way you instinctively licked your lips when you watched him stretch his neck in front of you. Or how your head spun when he lifted his shirt to wipe away his sweat when you worked out together.

One day was particularly bad. He had asked you to go to the public pool together, and being his best friend, of course you had said yes. As expected, he made you laugh until you were crying, scream when he playfully wrestled you in the water and giggle when he chased you on the water slide. And yet, you couldn’t help but notice his body. You almost felt bad, but then again, it wasn’t like you adored his character any less. You simply had some added adoration for another part of him. What were you supposed to do when he looked this good acting out a comic character while you played charades in the water? You might have been laughing on the outside, but you could barely tear your eyes off his neck and chest. Lately, you realized, the amount of thoughts you spent on wanting to kiss him had become problematic to you.

When you returned home at night, you couldn’t deny feeling sexually frustrated. Not wanting to give in to the inappropriate thoughts about your best friend, you turned on a tv show to distract yourself. But before you knew it, you were spending more time looking at your phone than at the tv screen. At first you browsed social media, but somehow you mustn’t have payed enough attention to your unconscious mind. You had miraculously landed on his Instagram, and when that didn’t entertain you anymore, you found yourself going back to your text messages with him. When you started at the shirtless picture he had sent you, you regretted not deleting it and forgetting about it right away. You wondered if he could ever feel the same way about you. You didn’t need any romantic feelings from him, in fact, you had no interest in a relationship at the moment. But you had never wanted someone this bad before and it was driving you crazy. So, before you could have stopped yourself, you were typing a message to him.

You: what r u doing??

H/N: do you miss me already?

H/N: ok do you really wanna know?

You: shut up you usually message me first!! and yes I do

H/N: I was about to jack off but you interrupted me

You almost choked on nothing when you read his message. Pretending you didn’t care, you replied quickly.

You: oh no am I killing the mood?

H/N: I didn’t say that

You: ????

H/N: don’t take this the wrong way but if you ever thought about sending me nudes again now would be the time

You: are u crazy?? are you actually asking me for nudes rn

H/N: it was worth a try ok let’s go back to being best friends who would never hook up

If you were freaking out about his previous messages, this one made you lose your mind completely. What was he saying? As confused as you were, you were also equally as sexually frustrated as he seemed to be. So, without a second thought, you chose the latest underwear picture you had taken and sent it to H/N.

You: that’s the most you’ll get…I won’t send complete nudes

You stared at the three dots indicating that he was writing a message. It felt like five minutes had passed when he finally replied.

H/N: fuck you’re so hot

And then he sent another shirtless picture. His bulge was prominent against his pants and the sight of it didn’t exactly help you with the pent-up frustration inside of you. But maybe it didn’t need to, because apparently, he felt the same way about you. You wanted to tell him about it. But there was no way you would be sexting your best friend at 11 pm, horny and frustrated. You knew you’d regret it and you’d only end up being embarrassed the next day. With no idea what to send him instead, you opted for simply waiting to see if he would say something. But he didn’t. Whilst waiting, you looked at his picture again. His jawline, his shoulders, his abs…and his boner straining against his sweatpants. For a moment you wondered if he was thinking about you too. Was he imagining it was you who was touching him when his hand wrapped around his cock? The more you let your thoughts run free, the worse your frustration became. And before you knew it, your hand was between your legs.

~~~

The next day you went about your duties, trying hard to pretend the previous day had been nothing but a fever dream. Luckily, you weren’t going to see him for another few days, so you could already practice an explanation of why sending nudes to each other had been a crazy idea. You worried about whether you could ever be the same around him after what had happened. But no matter how hard you tried to come up with a good reason why you should never even mention it again, you couldn’t. You were best friends who found each other hot. So what? Things could be worse. By nighttime, you had changed your mind. You were in the process of getting ready for sleeping, when your phone vibrated on your nightstand. His name lit up the screen.

H/N: you up?

You: not for long…whats up

H/N: I’m sorry for what I said yesterday about us not hooking up and so on…I was tipsy and you know my loose lips when I’m drunk

You: there’s nothing you need to apologize for

H/N: I was being weird and creepy…you’re my best friend

You: and you’re mine…that doesn’t stop me from finding you attractive

H/N: so I didn’t creep you out asking you for nudes?

You: I sent them to you, didn’t I… so what do u think

H/N: btw…thanks for that

You: likewise

…

H/N: so you’d do it again?

You: you’re not drunk now are you?

H/N: no just horny

You: dude I was about to go to sleep

If this had been a random guy you were occasionally talking to, you would have declined the request right away. You were tired and didn’t exactly feel too confident in your physical state. Nonetheless, you walked over to your mirror, pulled your shirt up until your bare breasts were almost exposed, and snapped a picture. Maybe it was the fact that you knew he’d return the favor and send you something back, or the immense trust you had in him. Posing in different ways, you took a few more pictures before you jumped back onto your bed. Impulsively, you chose the pictures you liked best and sent them to your best friend.

You: the things I do for you

H/N: fuck you look so good

You: have you always thought like that about me?

H/N: have I always found you hot?

You: yeah

H/N: I mean I never not found you hot

You: thanks I guess??

H/N: maybe we should have done this way earlier

You: agreed

Your eyes widened when he sent you a picture. He was still in his underwear, but his hand was wrapped around his visibly hard member outlined by the dark fabric. You had wanted to sleep, but somehow after looking at the photo for a little too long, you were wide awake. Leaning against the headboard of the bed, you let your head imagine whatever came to your mind. Never before had you noticed how much you liked his hands. Or maybe it was a temporary thing, now that you were already thinking inappropriate thoughts. You imagined it was his fingers softly touching the inside of your thigh, squeezing your breasts and playing with your nipples. The first time you moaned his name quietly, your cheeks heated up. But the more you thought of him, and the more you allowed yourself to wish it was him between your thighs, the more natural his name sounded between your whimpers.

And the two of you didn’t stop there. You might haven’t had time to hang out with him for another week or so, but you were texting each other more than ever before. Almost every night, you sent pictures to each other. With every passing day and every time you came thinking about his body on top of yours, you became more comfortable. Your messages to each other turned dirtier with every day and every picture was a little riskier than the previous one. By the way you cried out his name every night, your neighbors must have thought you had gotten a new boyfriend. One that was exceptionally good in bed, by the sounds of it.

Now it was exactly one week and a day after you had first sent him a picture of you. You had just stepped out of the shower and had a towel wrapped around your body as you entered your bedroom.

One could’ve thought you were going to be less horny, the more time you spent texting him about your inappropriate thoughts. It should have gotten less exciting at some point, shouldn’t it? To you, it was the complete opposite. He was all your thought about at night. So when you noticed your phone on your bed, you couldn’t stop your urge. You grabbed it, unlocked it and went straight to your messages with him.

You: please tell me you’re alone

H/N: yeah I am…do u need something?

Even though his text might have sounded innocent to anyone else, considering what you had done for each other all week long, you instantly got excited.

You: I have a present for you but since you’re not here I’ll unwrap it for you

H/N: I love presents

You had taken multiple photos. Starting from your with a towel covered body, you had slowly revealed more skin to him, until you had dropped the fabric completely. In the last picture you were covering your nipples with one hand across your chest, making sure your slightly parted lips were in the frame as well. After you had pressed ‘send’, you got comfortable on your bedsheets, not so patiently waiting for his reply. You hadn’t been able to get him off your mind while you had been showering. Now you didn’t even need to touch yourself to know how dripping wet you already were.

H/N: this is what you do to me

You were surprised when you saw his message. He had attached a video. Up to that day, it had only been photos you had sent to each other. So, when you clicked the ‘play’ button, you almost felt nervous. But the nervousness changed into something wholly different within the first two seconds of the video. His hand was down his pants, clearly stroking himself. He wasn’t speaking, but even the simple sound of his breathing behind the camera made your head spin.

H/N: do you want more?

You: I wish you were actually here

A blink of an eye after you had sent the message, instant regret hit you. Had you crossed a line? There had never been serious talk of the two of you actually hooking up, although you surely had thought about it more than you wanted to admit.

H/N: me too

You sighed in relief. So he wasn’t thinking you were going too far.

H/N: but its late and we’ve got work tomorrow

You barely had time to even think about a reply. The sole fact that he was seriously considering coming over or letting you drive to his place right now only justified the saying “People want what they can’t get”.

You: you’re right…this will have to do

…

H/N: let me know if you need more

But you already had your hand between your legs, his name on the brink of falling off your lips.  

The next day, you were surprisingly focused on your work. Of course, you thought of him. He was your best friend, after all. Who would you have been if you didn’t wonder what he was up to or if you didn’t wish he was having a nice day? But that was about it. No dirty thoughts, no random sexual frustration at 2 in the afternoon. That was, until your phone vibrated in your pockets and you opened his message.

H/N: wanna hang out at my place tonight?

It was finally Friday. After over a week of not seeing him, you didn’t just want to meet him because you wanted him sexually. You missed his silly jokes and the way he made you feel careless after a stressful day. So, needless to say, you agreed.

You weren’t sure what was going to happen. Were you just going to hang out, the way friends do? Were you even going to mention your texts to each other? Your nerves were going mad when you drove to his place in the evening. It was a weird feeling to have about your best friend, you had to admit. But then again, you had every right to after the past week.

When he opened the door for you, you didn’t feel half as awkward as you thought you would. His hug felt the way it always did, and his room still was like a second home to you.

“Do you wanna order take out?” he asked.

“What’s in your fridge?” you returned the question.

“If I’d have to guess I’d say two eggs, half a bottle of soda and some yogurt,” he said. You laughed, already pulling up an app to order some food.

“Take out it is,” you grinned, falling onto your stomach on his bed. He followed your example. His shoulder was touching yours while you tried hard to focus on scrolling through the different offers of meals. But your look was drawn to his hands too close to yours and from one moment to the other, your mind was flooded with sinful pictures. You thought of him here, in this very bed, jerking off to the thought of you. Taking pictures of himself so you could do the same. Too many times you had imagined your face buried in his pillows, letting him hear the way you had been crying his name all week long, being able to make him cum with your own body and feeling his lips on your skin. Was he thinking the same things right now? Was he also struggling to focus on the simplest tasks?

“You’ve been looking at that chicken for a while now. Are you gonna order it or not?” he asked, making fun of you. How were you going to sit here, waiting and then calmly eating your dinner as if nothing was different? When you didn’t reply, he grabbed your hands along with your phone, making you look at him. You couldn’t instantly read his expression. All you knew is that in six years of friendship, he had never once looked at you this way. Inevitably, your eyes went to his lips and back to his eyes.

“Aren’t we going to mention this whole nudes-sending situation at all?” he suddenly asked, grinning cheekily. “What? You’re thinking about it too, aren’t you?”

You swallowed thickly. “Thinking about what, exactly?”

“How badly I wanted you last night,” he said. His face was close to yours. If you only bent forward slightly, you could kiss him.

“As in…now you don’t want me anymore?” you asked. He chuckled.

“Do you really think I didn’t want to push you against the closest wall and make out with you the second you stepped into my house today?” he asked.

“Then why didn’t you?” you asked, smirking and inching your lips closer to his. “Because I would have loved that.”

Instead of answering you, he finally leaned in to connect your lips. Within the first seconds you were moaning, and his tongue was on yours. You abandoned your phone on his sheets, swinging one leg over his waist to straddle him. He groaned into your mouth when you pushed your hips against his, your crotch rubbing over his bulge. Judging by the way you both reacted, neither of you had plans to take this slow.

His hands wandered over your sides and to your ass, squeezing it a little. You only moaned again, your fingers getting busy with his button up shirt. Teasingly, he bit your lip while he pushed your shirt higher, goosebumps rising on the skin he touched. His breathing became heavier when you let your hands roam his chest, pushing the fabric of his open shirt to the side eagerly. When you rolled your hips over his bulge again, you felt his erection more prominently than before, making you smile to yourself. For a moment you pulled away and pulled your shirt over your head.

“I’ve wanted to touch you for so long,” he confessed, watching as you discarded your bra onto the floor.

“Me too,” you agreed. He had sat up as well, and you helped him remove his shirt eagerly. “I’ve been wondering what your hands feel like.”

At your words, he pulled you back on top of him, playing with your breasts softly. You reacted, leaning over him, so he could take one of your nipples into his mouth. You whimpered at the way his tongue pressed against your sensitive skin. He gave the same attention to the other side, his breath leaving behind a cold sensation where he had kissed you.

Then, you bent to his level again, lips meeting in a needy kiss. You let his tongue lead yours for a while. Meanwhile, your hands sneaked to the waistband of his sweatpants. He hissed into your mouth as you grabbed his length through his pants, palming him through the fabric.

“Are you still into biting?” you asked, referring to a late-night talk you had had in the past. He smirked, nodding. Softly, at first, you nibbled on his neck, occasionally licking and kissing him. You got the exact reaction you had expected when you bit him, not to harshly, but probably leaving a purple mark nonetheless. He moaned and threw his head back, only exposing more of his neck to you. As time went on, you made your way down his chest and his stomach, settling between his legs. As much as you enjoyed hearing his moans and attempts to make you hurry, you were just as impatient, if not worse.

In one go, you pulled down his pants and underwear. He lifted his hips so you could fully take the clothing off his legs. Your mouth watered at the sight of him below you.

“If you had told me two weeks ago, I would be sucking your dick today, I would have called you a clown,” you chuckled.

“Look how the tables have turned,” he said, laughing with you. But his expression hardened the moment your hand wrapped around his length. You stroked him a few times, before lowering your head. Your tongue licked a stripe up the side of his shaft, until you opened your lips just enough to take his tip into your mouth. He cursed under his breath when you batted your eyelashes at him.

“Fuck, don’t look at me like that,” he said.

“Why? Don’t you like it?” you asked, your hand continuously touching him.

“I like it maybe a little too much,” he said, only making you grin. His expression read pleasure, his brows furrowed and his lips hung slightly agape.

“There’s no such thing as liking something too much,” you said. Purposely, you watched his face when you wrapped your mouth around his cock, tongue pressing flat against the tip. Steadily, you bobbed your head, your hand covering the rest of his length. His thighs were flexing under your hands and his stomach was rising and falling in an uneven rhythm. He propped himself up on his forearms, watching you intently.

“This feels so much better when you do it,” he said, followed by a groan when his cock touched the back of your throat for a moment. Your hand was covered in your saliva by now, eyes tearing up a little bit, but you blinked the tears away quickly. Every time you pulled away a little, you made sure to swirl your tongue around the tip. Right away, you had noticed the way he hissed at that specific action. Again, he cursed under his breath and you made eye contact once more. His lips looked pink from where he had been biting them and his cheeks were slightly flushed a rosy color.

“Oh my god-,“ he moaned. “I’m so fucking close.”

You bobbed your head faster now. After another few seconds you pulled away, replacing your mouth with your hand. The muscles on his stomach were tense and he had his hands balled to tight fists next to his body. You enjoyed his moans for a while longer, before you could feel him twitch in your hands. When he reached his high, he let his body fall back, his arms no longer able to hold himself up to watch you. The evidence of his pleasure spilled onto his abs and you slowly let your hand come to a rest. One of his hands was swung over his forehead as he breathed heavily. When you looked up at him again, he still seemed exhausted but was grinning from ear to ear.

“Give me a second and I’ll return the favor,” he said, sitting up. At his words you realized once more how much you wanted him. Quickly, he cleaned himself up. As you rolled over to lay on your back next to his sitting figure, you yawned briskly, getting comfy in his sheets.

“You’re bored? If you want we can also just watch a movie, or if you feel like-,“ he said with raised eyebrows.

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” You sarcastically laughed, rolling your eyes at him. “I’m open for whatever. Right after you’ve made me cum on this mattress.”

“Alright,” he chuckled, turning so he hovered over you. “I think we can arrange that.”

He went straight to kissing your stomach and hips, while he unzipped your pants for you. His kisses tickled you a little, but the sensation was quickly forgotten by how close his hand was to where you wanted him most. In order to let him take off your pants, you lifted your hips a little. When he had thrown your pants aside, he couldn’t hide the cocky grin on his face at the sight of your underwear.

“This looks familiar…where have I seen these before?” he asked innocently, placing his hand on the material. You flinched a little when his fingers hovered over your center. It was a fleeting touch, but the lack of attention had made you needier than you would have thought.

“Imagine I hadn’t accidentally sent you that first picture,” you said.

“I don’t even want to imagine that,” he said, his dramatic tone making you laugh a little. Abruptly, your laugh turned into a whimper when he pressed one of his fingers against your covered clit.

“I get that you’re in no rush anymore, but I’m not gonna lie, I am,” you said, wriggling against his hand. He chuckled again but seemed to obey your request. His hand slid into the hem of your underwear, fingers instantly coated in your juices. In response, you only hummed contently when he curled his digits against your clit. Within seconds you relaxed into his touch. You put one of your arms under your head and closed your eyes for a while. Now and then, he teased your core by almost pushing his fingers inside of you, but then not doing so. As frustrating as it was, you couldn’t help but moan at the feeling. With skill, he rolled your clit between his digits. His free hand pulled on your underwear slightly, but not quite enough for it to come off. You whined at his teasing, looking into his eyes with a pleading gaze. He watched your expression for a while, probably enjoying the fact that he finally had the real you underneath him, instead of having to stare at some photos on his cellphone. So he finally obliged, making you feel empty when he pulled his hand out of your soaked panties, but simultaneously thankful.

“You have no idea how many times I imagined doing this within the last week,” he said. Then, he lowered his head and took your clit into his mouth. You had only opened your mouth to reply, but the words seemed to be deleted from your brain before they had time to come out, replaced by empty curse words. He didn’t waste any time in taking it slow, but you couldn’t have minded less. When he inserted to of his digits into you, your toes curled in pleasure and relief. With the way you whimpered desperately whenever he curled them against your walls, he had found your sweet spot in almost no time.

For more than a week you had been imagining, demanding for his touch, so deeply that now you could barely think straight when you finally got what you wanted. His tongue could do so much better than your own fingers could ever satisfy you. It was the unpredictability that made this so much more enticing than when you touched yourself. Would he slow down for a while, giving your breathing time to calm down, only to suck on your swollen clit feverishly out of nowhere? Would he curl his fingers inside of you almost painfully slowly, or would he almost pull them out completely, only to slide them right back into your core, until your vision felt so blurry you had to close your eyes? The more you thought about how good he made you feel, the quicker you felt your orgasm approach. One of his hands softly stroked over your belly, a strong contrast to the way your insides seemed to tie themselves into a tight knot that took up all your attention.

“Oh my god- please don’t stop,” you only moaned. Of course he didn’t. He only hummed against your center, only adding to how incredible you felt. As much as you loved watching him between your legs, there was no force that could have kept your eyes from shutting anymore. Your back arched off the sheets and your hands tightened in pleasure when the familiar feeling washed over your mind. You whimpered and struggled hard to keep your legs from closing around his head. For a few seconds you were blinded by the bliss, until your sensitivity began to set in. You softly pushed his head with your fingers in his hair, and he slowed down and drew back.

It took you a while to come down and until your breathing had regained its normality. Your eyelids fluttered open, while he plopped down next to you. He swung one of his arms around your waist, an action he had done multiple times in the past – only now neither of you was wearing clothes.

“That was amazing,” you said. “And here I thought I’d forever regret sending you that photo.”

He chuckled. “Agreed. So, what do you say? Are we able to focus on what to order for takeout now?”

You nodded and laughed, hoping this instance wouldn’t be the last time this happened between you two.

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