#big ol fucking bitch fest

[taxidermy-bat]

this is thus far thte worst fucking december. i got laid off my job, the job ive been pouring my heart and soul into to keep improving and getting better at. retail is fucking hard but i never imagined working in my dream store being this soul wrenching lmao? i would die for the store i work for and the staff bc its an amazing place but they laid me off for two weeks during christmas bc i make too many mistakes. im not mad at them, but i am. it was embarrassing. they let me walk into my shift with my branded hat and my fucking coffee like everything was normal and then they sent me out in a cab while i sobbed. laid off during christmas. i thought i was doing so well there, turns out im an inconvenience and nothing i do is enough. im  sure they had logical reasons to get rid of me for a bit but it furcking hurt. i keep replaying that afternoon in my head, its fucking haunting me. i cant sleep at all. my insomnia came back because of this. i keep replaying what happened in my head and i cant stand to be alone riht now but of course everyone is busy or has to workl. so im home alone with my thoughts. 

not to mention my brain picked this week and the past week of all times to have the worst art block ive had in a while. that probablt doesnt sound like it should be that agonizing btu i truly dont know who or what i am without my art to do. and thats the proble,m , ive been having such a big fucking identity crisis for the past two months that im paralyzed mentally. i cant do anything anymore without feeling like im lying to myself and everyone around me. cant think about my hair, my clothes, what i say or how i act, my art, i cant do anything. everything i do feels like a lie. a stupid, vicious lie that i keep changing every day just to get by. i cant just have no name and not exist to anyone. im sick of this body, of myself, im sick of my room. im sick of my art. im done being me, i dont even know who it is thats in the mirror when i look. i want so desperately to just fucking make sense to myself. i want so badly to feel like i know myself. i dont know a fucking thing about myself now more than ever. it doesnt matter how drastically i change my hair, nothing i can do makes me happy anymore. no change makes me feel anything. im incapable of doing anything else, all i can think about doing is self destructive acts to just make me feel SOMETHING for once. even if its pain or hate i just want to feel somethgin strongly so i know im not completely desensitized to everything the world has. im fuckign tired of feeling empty and dead because nothing i do moves me or makes me feel like they should. i buzzed my fucking hair all off this month.  i would have been happy if  it had made me horribly upset. it would have been somethign. but no, i just shrug at anything i do to myself. none of it is enough. theres nothing drastic enough  i could do to make my brain react. nothing is solid. im fucking nothing. i have nothing to my identity, im nothing. im replaceable. im tired of this existence. im sick of me. nothing is in my grasp. i cant stand it. i cant even make art about it. everything i make nowadays is mediocre to me, it makes me want to vomit. im disgusted by myself. i cant stand me. this is the only place i have to fuckin yyell about it. if anyone who read this far could just fucking shoot me or somethgin and let my life be replaced by someone else who will be better that would probably be best. 

#big ol fucking bitch fest

[imnotwolverine]

Wolfie’s Fic Recs | Anguish and Angst

ANGUISH AND ANGST FICS - Ready for some tear jerkers? Not-so-sweet dreams are made of these fics, so get your tissues and comfort blanket ready. 

🖐 WARNING: NSFW + anxiety inducing content beneath the cut 🖐

Break-ups & Heartbreak

@emyearns probably knows exactly what my first breakup looked like, because.. *ugly cries*. Get your tissues ready for Ghost Of You. [Mike x reader]

August sees the one who got away in No More Tears by @littlefreya [August Walker x OFC] - And I love-love-love that this is written from August’s POV! ❤️

Wearing a man’s sweater gets a whole different meaning after reading this heartbreaking fic by @emyearns. Coffee and Ink [Walter x OFC] 

Ready for some songfic breakup sadness? #11 Captain Sy by @onlyhenrys [Syverson x reader]

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Unrequited Love

Sy’s being a fool and he realises it too late. Soldier On by me. [Syverson x reader]

Henry’s a dick in this one. And you simply had Enough of always being there at the ready as his best friend. By @the-soot-sprite [Henry Cavill x reader]

Would you walk out that door? This angsty prompt’s got you all kinds of frustrated. By @onlyhenrys

I wasn’t sure whether to place this here. But a child’s love is love too. Geralt secretly watches a family have a picnic and the kid is apparently not afraid of monsters. Highway to Hell by @wendimydarling [Geralt of Rivia] 

Let’s take a little bit of a breather with a mildly angsty, but mostly very fluffy fic of friends-taking-way-too-fucking-long-to-become-lovers. Stolen Kisses by @the-soot-sprite [Henry Cavill x OFC]

This fic is probably the pinnacle of unrequited love; it’s got slow-burn, angst-turns-fluff-in-the-end and Henry being an utter fool in the love department. (Ps. I haven’t completely caught up with this fic, so NO SPOILERS IN THE COMMENTS DAMNIT!)  Chances by @foodieforthoughts [Henry Cavill x OFC]

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Nightmares & PTSD

If you want angsty dreams followed by hot, craving smut; Stay and read this fic. By me [Henry Cavill x reader]

Waking up in a hospital bed with a strange man beside you. It’s a setup I wish was a full length fic, but alas..Short but mighty. Emotion challenge - Anxious by @onlyhenrys [Walter Marshall + reader]

Nightmares wake August, but you're there to guard him when the storms outside and in get too dark. Prompt with August by @onlyhenrys [August Walker x reader]

More nightmares are kept at bay in this gorgeous little fic by @littlefreya. Angel Can You Hold Me [August Walker x OFC]

More nightmare-having bulky dudes? Marshall’s life isn’t all roses and sunshine, even when he’s caught a pretty thing in his bed. Can’t You Stay A Little Longer by @onlyhenrys [Walter Marshall x reader]

The more cutting the hurt of your past, the harder it is to open up to new people. Henry has walked on eggshells, but now finally wants to know what’s up. And if words can’t form on lips, perhaps they can..on fingertips. Please Don’t Leave Me by @wendimydarling [Henry Cavill x reader]

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It’s a Hard Knock Life

I can’t be the only LotR-nerd who got elf!Geralt vibes when watching the Witcher. So let me give you some impossible love, anguish and Middle Earth hardships in When In Dreams [elf!Geralt x human!OFC] 

You’re not sure whether Charles will return, so the last few hours with him are Sad indeed. By @onlyhenrys [Charles Brandon x reader]

We’re all having a hard knock life with the pandemic going on. So let Marshall give you some sweet care in Pandemic Anxieties by @promptandpros [Walter Marshall x reader]

Between the lines of smoking hot Superman sex, you’ll feel bad for him. Because as morning comes, life goes on. Alone. On the road. Where he hopes he’ll find yet another hot shower and a bed for the night. Convenience by @wendimydarling [Clark Kent x OFC]

Had a bad day? Henry will give you clear instructions on how to relax in: Your Voice by @peachyvulpixie [Henry Cavill x reader]

You play with the locket to your heart when Walter returns, gunpowder in the air. Despite your anniversary and all things good, you just know something’s up with him. Unnamed Marshall piece by @writernerd23 [Walter Marshall x reader]

Falling Again follows struggling AU!Henry dad as the bills keep piling and life just won’t feel the way it did when his wife was still around. By @deathonyourtongue​ [AU!Henry Cavill] 

--

Depression & Body Consciousness 

Depression is a bitch, but Henry isn’t. When Words Fail, he’s there. By @princess-of-riviaa [Henry Cavill x reader]

Failing to conceive is painful, terrible, heartbreaking. And unfortunately not even the big bear can’t make it better. Feeling Challenge: Sad by @meowpurrbooks [Henry Cavill x reader]

More conceiving sadness is there in Negative, by @oddduckthatgirl -- some Christmasses just truly suck. [Henry Cavill x reader]

The loss of your husband still crushes you and his best friend, Syverson, even a year after his passing. Get your tissues ready, because this is one big ol’ tearjerker; A Soldier’s Heart by @onlyhenrys [late husband x reader + Captain Syverson]

You feel like the new life within you is the last thing Napoleon wants in his life. A Mistake by @coloraturadiva [Napoleon Solo x reader]

Good love is accepting that change is part of life. And loving one-self is often the hardest, especially when those changes seem to pry you apart from Henry. Comfort by @promptandpros [Henry Cavill x reader]

An insecure woman meets a man in the club. But this man’s not like the others, not one bit. Unexpected by @nuggsmum​ [August Walker x OFC]

Sometimes even burrito blankets can’t give you comfort. Nor your favourite show, nor anything really. Depression truly is a bitch, especially when Henry’s away. Stuck In Your Head by @inlovewithhisblueeyes [Henry Cavill x reader]

Faye’s text messages in this fic still crack me up every time, though they sure make for a stark contrast to the burned latkes and big tear fest -- it’s a good thing Marshall is a big fluffy care bear. The Great Jewish Cook-off by @inlovewithhisblueeyes [Walter Marshall x reader]

--

Corruption & Death

Walking on woodland trails you find something naive to Corrupt. By @emyearns. [angel!Mike x reader]

August has died many deaths, but still he craves One More Time - just so he can be with her. By @thetaoofzoe [August Walker x OFC] 

Our great master of angst and death suffers, and makes the world suffer, once more. There Cannot Be Peace by @killjoy-assbutt-1112 [August Walker x reader]

Okay, so this one’s on AO3, but I’ve loved it ever since first reading it. Geralt hears of Jaskier’s death and realizes a thing or two as he tries to come to terms with it all. It’s Like I’ve Gone Off To The Coast by adhdbuck [Geralt + Jaskier] 

Napoleon finds himself in a hospital, not sure what to feel as he waits for doctors to give him news. The News. Any news. Grief by @promptandpros [Napoleon Solo x OFC]

The king of corruption is defiling an angel without wings in Black Tears, by @littlefreya [August Walker x OFC]

When death comes knocking, Geralt realises his annoying bard isn’t one he wants to lose. Did You Mean It by @thecomfortofoldstorries​ [Geralt x Jaskier]

Sometimes good things come to an end, but Henry just doesn’t want it. Not even when the doctors are losing hope. The Call: Irresistible You by @angrythingstarlight [Henry Cavill x OFC]

August Walker is the perfect kind of nightmare material. Especially in this terribly hot angsty smut piece by @hope-to-hell: Dream State [August Walker x reader]

This gorgeous impressionistic piece includes raspberry mousse, blood, scarred hands and August Walker. Into The Storm by @hope-to-hell [August Walker x OFC]

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Need a little lift-me-up after all these tear jerkers? Short Sweets is a fic rec list with a bunch of completely innocent and utterly lovely fics which will keep the bad dreams at bay ❤️

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If you have any good recommendations that fit in this list, please add in the comments or reblog! 

( Fan art by me 😊)

#Wolfie's Fic Recs #angst #henry cavill fanfiction #clark kent #Henry Cavill fandom #august walker #Walter Marshall #geralt of rivia #grief #anxiety #depression

[katutsukushii]

2????I waana add some fics to my bookmarks if you shall find the time to answer this maam😊😊😊

2. What’s next on your ‘to-read’ list? (Fan fiction or otherwise)

I don’t really have ‘to-read’ fics or anything like that, I just have fics that are currently updating and that I’m currently reading, that’s it.

But some of my fave fics that I’m currently reading are:

Flower Bouquet - fucking obviously I’m going to put this absolute masterpiece on this list; this right here is one of the most incredible works of art that I have ever read. It’s BkDk and it is Omegaverse but please, even if you’ve never really seen the appeal in A/B/O, read this. It’s..... fucking amazing. Just beautifully written, heartbreaking, so fucking good. 10/10

ilomilo - first of all, mind the pairing (they’re both adults in the fic though and the age gap isn’t that big at all). This fic right here has me in a chokehold. It is so damn good; I love the whole concept of it but listen!! Katsuki in this??? The sweetest little thing I’ve ever seen in my whole ass life, he is so damn precious, so cute and adorable and he wears dresses!! An innocent bean. This is the fic that got me to actually like Omega Bakugou, and it’s probably one of the only fics with that specific subgender that I’ll ever fully enjoy.

You’re a Blast - again, mind the pairing, and again, the age gap is practically nonexistent lmao anyways, this right here is one of my favourite fics. They’re both so complex and so beautifully written and there’s such good development in the characters and the relationship too. I’m so sad it only has two chapters left before it’s finished, I’m going to miss it so damn much.

Social Media: 101 - to be completely honest, I need to catch up with this fic. The last chapter I read was chapter 10 and the fic itself is so upsetting to me that I cannot read it until it’s over because I know fine well if I have to wait for Katsuki to get comfort it will actually break me. I have anxiety and it would keep me up at night lmao but!!! if you’re looking for some good fucking angst this is the fic for you. It hurts so damn bad.

blackugou widow - need I say more? It’s BAMF Katsuki, obviously I’m going to fucking like it. It’s an amazing fic, one of my favourites, I adore it and I’ve reread it an embarrassing amount of times.

So the Dead rages, and the Living weeps - Bakucamie friendship. That’s it. It’s such a good fic and I really love the whole concept of it; this was actually the fic that inspired me to write one of my wip’s about human experimentation. It’s really fucking good.

Blame It On Me - I just have a weak spot for angsty fics where Katsuki suffers, his parents suck and Aizawa takes care of him. This has all of that and it also gives us the Shinbaku brothers we deserve. Good shit.

Liability - Katsuki suffers again and needs a hug, I volunteer to give said hug. Good shit.

Fuck You, Pay Me - it’s just that good ol’ classic fic with mobsters and shit, it’s good. I’m just weak for that mafia trope, tbh, and Katsuki is a bad bitch in this. And also I really love Shinbaku.

Trial by Fire - this fic is one of the worst best things that’s ever happened to me. It is insanely well written, the concept is beautiful, it’s so good but fuck, it hurts so bad. The whole fic is just one giant angst fest in which Katsuki suffers so fucking badly, it’s really painful. Due to the fact that I am an emotionless rock I never cry but this fic right here broke me several times. It’s very good at reminding you how much pain Katsuki is in. It shows trauma and how to deal with it really well, it’s beautiful. But I stopped reading at chapter 37 and am currently waiting for the fic to finish because I cannot keep reading it until Katsuki gets his happy ending lmao

Scar Tissue - just some good ol’ Bakutodo omegaverse fuckery. It’s really sweet, actually, their interactions always make me happy and I really love this fic a lot.

The Ticking Time Bomb - fucking amazing concept, I love it. I adore this whole fic, I really do, and we’re currently at the peak of pain and I’m waiting for an update heh

A Fissile Family - I love all of Sif’s fics but this one is so good already. I just love the entire idea of Katsuki being close to the League, I really do. I love the villains and I love Katsuki, it’s basically the perfect fic.

You Do Not Fuck With Fair Folk - I’m going to be completely honest, I read this one while travelling from one country to another and I was starving and sleep deprived so I don’t remember much about it but I do remember looooving it, I do know it’s good and it has all the shit that I love, I just need to reread it lmao

The Truth About Family - spoiler alert but Katsuki has AFO. Need I say more?

Elixir - Katsuki having a special ability/power that makes him superior to others? Angst and fear and suffering? I love it.

Basically an Angry Environmentalist - it has human experimentation and I’m weak for that shit, it also has badass Katsuki and Izuku who I desperately want to punch, so it’s really fucking good. I love love love this fic!

Homeward Bound - Katsuki is BAMF and he suffers while also being a bad bitch, I adore it.

Standing at Ground Zero - this fic hurts. It fucking hurts. It is actually upsetting the way Katsuki changes and how much he suffers and goes through but it’s such a good fic.

He Wasn’t - this fic deals a lot with Katsuki’s mental health and it has so much angst; it’s also quite interesting with some plot twists and stuff. Good shit, I love it.

Lines Crossed - I’m just pathetically weak for Dabi and Bakugou friendships, like... my boys!!! Katsuki suffers and Dabi is a good boy.

By Design - I don’t normally read fics from Izuku’s POV but this fic!!!! So good, check it out please, it’s amazing.

Can you tell I lost steam near the end? Lmao

I put it under the line cause it got too long, anyways these are all absolutely incredible, there’s a lot more in my ‘marked for later’ section but these are the ones that really stand out to me and that I check for every day.

#anon #ask meme #bnha #bnha fic #fic rec #mha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #jay answers

[your-local-bnha-writer]

Hello ur my favorite account😭! Can I request a HC with Tanaka, Noya, Tsuki, & Kageyama where u guys are dating but at a tournament, u run into ur ex boyfriend ( who is a huge douchebag) and is saying a bunch of garbage about u? How would they react? , how would it impact their playing style cause get this- karasuno is playing against ur ex boyfriends team🤭🤭🤭🤭

jealous bfs tanaka, noya, tsukki kags,

hey I’m gonna mash these two requests! I hope you enjoy this was a lot of fun to write!

also favourite account?? me?? 🥺🥺

➣ characters included : tanaka, noya, tsukki, kageyama (separately) x fem!reader

➣ headcannons

➣ warning : a lot of swearing 😳 like there’s a lot, your jerk ex talking crap, scary bfs

ryūnosuke tanaka

- karasuno had made it to the nationals, and right before their game against Tsubakihara, lil ol Tanaka had to use the bathroom

- a horrible decision really, just ask hinata

- he walks in and hears your trash ex talking crap abt you

“Yeah, can you believe it? I saw my ex here, Y/n. I think she’s the manager for her team? Karasuno. Is she really that desperate for attention from other guys?”

- Tanaka is p i s s e d like, no one gets to talk about his precious love without experiencing the wrath from Ryūnosuke Tanaka

- So mans just straight up walks to your ex, “gently” taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and starts defending your honour

“Y/n? Y/n L/n? The most beautiful, gorgeous, precious girl in the world? That Y/n?”

“Uh, yeah? Who are y—”

“Hi I’m the new boyfriend, and let me just tell you...”

- Tanaka goes oFF he’s not letting this douche bag of an ex get his way, he straight up just goes on a 2 hours speech about how perfect you were

- and how much of a douche your ex was

- Eventually, Hinata finds Tanaka in the bathroom (since his stomach was actin up lol) and goes to alert the other guys + you

- So, the whole gang is here, Daichi and Suga have to drAG Tanaka away from your ex while Noya hypes him up

- You have to calm him down and ask him why the hell he was yelling at someone in the bathroom

“Your ex was talking shit about you, I’m not just gonna let them do that”

- You’re immediately like 🥺🥺 Tanakaaaa you didn’t have to do that omg I love you sm

- When it’s finally time play these guys Tanaka is surprisingly calm, like it’s actually terrifying

- Oh and you bet Tanaka’s going all out he is on fire, he’s landing every spike and you can practically hear the impact on it

- Right after he lands a spike he celebrates with his team and stares directly at your ex who’s shooketh 😳

“Yeah take that! You regret breaking up with Y/n now?”

“Tanaka stOoOoP omg—”

- After Karasuno wins he gives you the most passionate kiss, in front of your ex and you pull away blushing

- Your ex just rolls his eyes and goes to pack up with his team while Tanaka’s looking all smug and Noya’s hyPED

yuu nishinoya

- The boys were getting ready for the match against Johzenji, and were just doing some basic warmups

- You had to help Kyoko and Yachi with something so you weren’t in the gym at the moment

- But your asshole of an ex was talking shit about you, very loudly 😳 and very obnoxiously too

- This mf, instead of practicing and doing fricken warmups, he’s talking crap abt you, and you weren’t even in the vicinity!

- But your boyfriend was, oh and he heard everything, every single word that came out of you ex’s mouth

“Pfft yeah she’s still annoying as ever, not surprised she’s dating the dude that’s 5’2”

- Ohh big mistake bud, not only did you insult his perfect Gf, but his height as well? Like dang pick one or the other dude

- So, Noya can’t take it anymore he’s been holding back bc he’s supposed to be warming up for the game but at this point he just couldn’t

- He straight up runs over to the other side of the gym to knock some sense into the jerk

- Tanaka follows not to stop him (although he is a bit worried 😳) but to hype him up bc that’s his best friend’s gf you don’t get to do that

- Asahi is scared shitless so Ennoshita has to keep the horny tornado in check, while Suga is conflicted

“What the hell did you say? Don’t you dare insult Y/n again! This is why she left your sorry ass! Who are you talk shit about my beautiful girlfriend I’ll fight you right now—”

- Ahem well, as you can see he’s very pissed off and uh he ends up getting scolded by coach Ukai

- except at the very end of him scolding he gives noya a few pointers on how to defend your gf without showing bad sportsmanship

- You witness the whole thing and just go up to Noya to calm him down a little

“Thank you, but you didn’t have to go off like that,”

“Yeah I did, Im not letting that douche talk shit about my crazy hot girlfriend”

- noya stop this isn’t the time 😳🥵

- During the game he is extremely focused and there’s this terrifying aura that’s escaping him

- Like Asahi might actually shit his pants just standing next to him

- Karasuno absolutely destroys Johzenji bc Noya is not letting that ball drop on their side of the court

- After the game, like Tanaka Noya straight up kisses you in front of your ex, leaving you a blushing mess as Noya gives him a smug look

kei tsukishima

- aHEM um, alright get ready folks bc this is a scary one

- So it’s Kagugawa vs Karasuno and Yamaguchi is sort of wandering around with Hinata right before the game probably to try and cool their nerves 💀💀

- When they hear your someone talking abt you

“My ex is here we’re vs her team, I know yeah, she’s probably so annoying”

- Dude Yamaguchi and Hinata have never ran faster in their entire lives, they immediately go to tsukki and it’s just a scream fest

“TSUKKI THERES SOMEONE TALKING ABT Y/N!”

“yeAH!! and he was all like ‘she’s probably so annoying’”

“mHM AND—”

“okay I think I got it, where are they?”

- shits about to go down, when Tsukki gets mad, he doesn’t lose is cool, instead he keeps a level head and strategize on how to completely destroy his opponent

- so Yams and Hinata drag him to where your ex was and point him out, and he’s stILL on the phone

“Mhm, yeah she’s super annoying”

- Oh Tsukki is pissed off, he has this intimidating aura coming from him as he approaches the dude that’s shitting on you

“You’re the ex? Yikes...😬”

- Tsukki will wait for what he has to say and the whole time he just has the biggest smirk on his face, like it’s about to go down

- Yams and Sho are hyped uP but they’re waiting behind the door bc they’re babies and they’re scared

- Mm Tsukki does not hold back, he straight up roasts this dudes ass, mans just releases all the salt that’s stored in him

“Mhm yeah, that’s pretty pathetic”

“Heh lame”

“Wow...I can’t believe she really dated you”

- Yeah that’s not that much salt

- Tanaka find the three of them in the bathroom and as much as he wants Tsukki to keep going, they have to get ready for the game

- During the game, your ex tries to spike and he’s instantly shut down my Tsukki and his 6’3 ass, It’s quite hilarious 😌

- Anyways, Tsukki blocks your ex every single time wiTH A SMIRK, mans is not holding back on this bitch

- He says it’s bc he was predictable

- Later, Karasuno beats Kagugawa and Tsukki hardcore glares at your ex like it’s pretty scary since Tsukki is one to act all sassy rather than mad when he gets irritated

“You don’t talk shit about her, ever”

- SUDHDJD DAMN TSUKKI CHILLL

- You watch all of this happen and you immediately ask your boyfriend if something was wrong bc you’re a tad bit worried

“We just had a disagreement that’s all”

“uHH YEAH RIGHT TSUKKI WENT OFF EARLIER IN THE BATHROOM—”

tobio kageyama

- Um another scary bitch please do not talk trash about his gf when he’s around

- He’s probably filing his nails away from his team bc he needs his peace and quiet and doesn’t wanna get bullied by Hinata and Tsukki

- When he hears a guy talking very loudly to his friend, now usually he’d ignore them or move spots but like this dude is talking abt you

- So, he stays for a bit and listens to what he has to say. Who even is this dude? Why does he know you? Why is talking to loud like please shut the f—

“Pfft yeah my ex is here with her volleyball team, I talked to her earlier and oh my god she’s exactly the same when I first dated her”

- I’m not sure if that’s a roast sorry I’m bad at these

- Oh now Kags is pissed, see he was already a little irked that this jerk was your ex but he was also talking trash abt you? Nahh

- He throws his nail file on the ground and stomps right up to this douche to smack some sense in him

“Yeah she’s hella annoy—”

“Why don’t you shut the fuck up?”

“Who tf—”

- So Kageyama is also unusually “calm” about the whole situation which makes it even more terrifying

- Kageyama will most likely go off and tell this dude that he has no business talking abt his gf like that

- he’ll focus more on dissing the dude and let me tell you this dude’s roasts h u r t

- like his insults are like 90% swear words

“goblin lookin ass”

“long titty no nipple lookin ass”

“get outta here you abominable fuck waffle”

- Imagine this scary ass dude coming up to you, telling you to shut the fuck up, then realizing this is Tobio Kageyama, The King of the Court, the incredible setter that has precise aim, the 2nd half of the freak duo, going off on how you should stfu abt his gf

- oh and you’re facing him on your next game

- and he absolutely obliterates your sorry ass

- his sets are perfect, he blocks every single fuckin spike you make, and when you think he’s going setting to #10 think again bc he will do a setter dump

- basically he’s on fire and tear the other team to shreds it’s kind of scary actually, hinata was sweating buckets when kageyama served since he looked so terrifying at the moment

- after the game, kageyama would want to leave immediately he doesn’t want to see your ex anymore

“You doing okie? Did something happen with you and him before the game?”

“Yep, but it’s nothing don’t worry about it”

- kags you have that creepy smile again stop you’re scaring y/n

#this was fun :) #i had fun #haikyuu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcannons #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu tanaka #haikyuu nishinoya #haikyuu tsukishima #haikyuu kageyama #tanaka ryuunosuke #yuu nishinoya #kei tsukishima #tobio kageyama #tanaka x reader #tanaka imagines #tanaka headcannons #nishinoya imagines #nishinoya x reader #nishinoya headcannons #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima imagines #tsukishima headcannons #kageyama imagines #kageyama x reader #kageyama headcannons #haikyuu requests

[illfoandillfie]

Interloper

Request:  Sorry if this is a weird request but can you do a thing where the reader is apart of Queen and after a concert Roger, Brian and John just pass her around like she’s just holes to fuck but when they’re done they’re all super soft and sweet (and Reader’s maybe a little snarky)

Pairing: Roger Taylor x Brian May x John Deacon x Reader

Warnings: Big Ol’ Smut-fest - 18+!, Hate fucking (kind of?), oral sex (m receiving), degradation, facial, handjob, unprotected sex, anal, light spanking, orgasm delay, choking, nipple play, tit fucking (blink and you’ll miss it), free use,dom/sub dynamics (sub!reader)

Words: 5990

A/N: I seem to have gotten myself a reputation for writing group sex and honestly i love that for me. (Is it my brand?) Anyway, I hope the anon who requested this enjoys it!

Taglist: @laedymoon  @somekind-ofcheese @dtfrogertaylor @ezmina98  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor @bowiequeen

The stadium was darker now than it had been when you left the stage. It was quieter too, no longer drowned in the noise of the music or the crowd. They’d been wild, making you feel truly welcome on the stage for the first time since the tour started a week earlier. You sighed and dropped what remained of your cigarette next to your previous one, grinding it under the heal of your boot. If you were lucky the boys would have already headed off to the afterparty, left you to get changed in peace and make your way there in your own time. It was part of why you stayed behind, hidden in the wings as you watched the last of the crowd drift out and roadies pack up the instruments and dismantle the lighting rig. You’d needed a smoke anyway, and to try and burn every second of the show into your long-term memory, so it was the perfect excuse. Although, you would have done anything to avoid the rude comments and criticism that were sure to be hurled in your direction had you headed backstage straight away. Because that’s all you’d been getting lately. Not from Freddie, though if anyone had a right to bitch and moan it was him since you were playing second vocalist. Brian’s attitude you could also understand since they had you on guitar for a couple of songs too, but John and Roger had absolutely no right to treat you as appallingly as they had been. You thought it was out of some stupid sense of band loyalty but Freddie insisted it was because they missed shagging you. Maybe you were both right.  

Your footsteps echoed off the walls as you made the solitary journey back to the dressing rooms to change into something a little less stage worthy but no less eye-catching, praying you’d find it empty. You were almost there when you heard voices coming from the other end of the corridor. It had to be them on their way out. With a deep breath you squared your shoulders and held your head high and kept walking right at them. Roger whacked into your shoulder as he passed you, with far too much force for it to be an accident.  “Watch it arsehole,” you spat at his back.  He flicked the V at you.  “Out of the way,” Brian snarled as he shoved past you, followed by a snickering John. You ignored them as best you could, continuing on your way. Clearly the phenomenal show had done nothing to change their minds. If anything, they were more aggro now, having seen the audience, their fans, embrace you wholeheartedly. Freddie was a few steps behind them, flashing you an apologetic look as he reached you, but you waved him off.  “It’s fine,”  “Their being right cocks and you know it.”  “Yeah but I don’t know how to get them to stop. I’ve tried explaining, I’ve tried reasoning, I’ve tried being a bitch, I’m giving up. Clearly it doesn't matter to them that we used to get on so well, so I’m done trying.”  “They need a good stern talking to. Sit them down like naughty schoolboys and yell for a bit.”  You laughed, “Yeah, maybe."  “All I know is It's getting boring, this winging.”  “For me two Fred. But they can’t keep it up for the whole tour, that’s bloody months. They’ll have to get sick of it soon.  His shrug was disheartening but he didn’t have a chance to say much more as Brian called for him to hurry up.  “Do you want me to wait for you?”   “Nah, you go ahead,”  He nodded, leaving you with a squeeze of your shoulder. You took your time getting changed into a short tight dress, sequins around the hem to catch the light, perfect for a party and, bonus, not stinking of your sweat, before grabbing your stuff and heading out to the car.  

The party was in full swing when you got there, music blaring and drinks flowing. You rolled your eyes at the sight of Brian chatting up a woman almost young enough to be his daughter and skirted around them on your way to the bar. You were two shots in, starting to wonder which of the people making eyes at you would be worth your time, when you felt a hand on your waist. Turning your head just enough to see him out of the corner of your eye you realised who it was, cutting him off before he could utter whichever godawful pickup line he was about to use.  “Fuck off Roger, I’m not who you’re looking for.”  His hand slipped away from you, “Oh for fucks sake, it’s you.” He was slurring just enough to notice, “Thought you’d be off slutting it up by now.”  “Isn’t that your job?”  “Pretty rich coming from someone who blew her way to the top. At least I fucking worked for it.”  “You know I worked for it too,”  “Sure, worked at suppressing your gag reflex.”  “God I am so fucking sick of this shit. How many times do I have to tell you none of it was my fucking idea? Freddie was the one who set up the meeting with the record company and they were the ones who thought it’d be a good idea to stick me on the album. I didn’t volunteer for this. Believe me, if I had shagged myself into a record contract I wouldn’t be hanging around with you pricks. I’d be releasing my own album with my own songs.”  “You used to like our pricks. Couldn’t get enough of them.”  “Jesus, Freddie was right.”  “About what?”  “Nothing. Sod off would you? There’s a guy over there who looks hung and easy and your scaring him off,”  “Not me, love, your atrocious singing’s done that already.”  “You’re such a wanker.”  “Bitch,”  “Cunt,”  “Now now children. Meant to be a party.” Freddie said, tapping on the bar for another drink.  “It’s fine Fred, I’m...”  “Don’t you dare say you’re going. This is your party too and it’s much too early for a cohost to leave,” he turned towards Roger, “pull your head in Rog, just for one night.”  “Can’t believe you’d take her side in all this, she’s a fucking bitch,”  “Used that one already Rog, getting sloppy.”  “Oh enough already. I’m sick of the constant bickering. Where are Bri and Deaky we need to have a band meeting, upstairs, now.”  “Christ, don’t get your knickers in a twist.”  “Just find them.” 

Freddie charmed the key to a function room out of the bartender’s hands and the two of you made your way upstairs. You both fell silent as you waited in the dimly lit room. There were a number of large round tables covered in white table clothes, each surrounded by chairs. Some of them were still laid out with cutlery and half-drunk jugs of water, left overs from whichever event had finished before your party started, the staff called away to help man the bar and offer appetisers to everyone downstairs before they could finish tidying up.  “Wonder what was going on in here?” you asked as you sat in one of the chairs  “Wedding reception?” Freddie ventured, halfheartedly.  You both fell silent, not entirely sure what else to say. He’d listened to you whine about the other three enough times to know everything you were thinking and you could tell his patience was wearing thin. It took the others about twenty minutes before they joined you, grumbling the whole time.  “C’mon Fred, what’s this about? Ruined my shot with Tabitha just now,”  “Tabitha? That’s a cat’s name,”  “Shut up Deacy,”  Roger laughed as he dropped into a spare seat, already pushed out from a table.  “Shut up all of you.” Fred said loud enough to make them pause.  John turned away from Brian, looking for a place to sit, when his eyes fell on you, the grin sliding off his face, “What’s she doing here? Thought this was a band meeting?”  “It is,”  “She’s not part of the fucking band Fred,”  “On this tour she is.”  “No way,” Brian half shouted, “If that interloper is here then I’m going,”  “Brian, fucking hell, just stop for two seconds.” Freddie stepped in front of the door to block Brian’s path, and looked over to you. For a moment you thought he was going to try and appease Brian by throwing you out but instead he just said, “give them a right bollocking,” before darting out the door and slamming it shut. All four of you were frozen until you heard the unmistakable sound of the lock and then Brian was at the door, jiggling the knob and yelling, “let us the fuck out of here Mercury, or I swear to God.”  “Not until you sort your shit out.” Freddie yelled back, “I’m off to have another drink, I’ll be back in a few hours and I expect you all to be friends by the time I return.” 

“This is all your fault,” Roger pointed at you, catching the attention of the other two, “You shouldn’t even be here,”  “And why not?”  “Because you’re not part of Queen.”   “You heard Freddie, I am for this tour.”  Your statement was met with scoffs of derision and rolled eyes.  “Jesus, what is your problem?” You turned your back on Brian to glare at John and Roger, waiting for someone to answer. John was the first to speak, surprising you. His resentment had always been a bit quieter than the other two, whispered comments and underhanded criticisms rather than outright name calling. If anyone had been taking bets you would have placed your money on Brian throwing the first stone.   “Our problem is you. Just turned up one day and started singing”  “And playing guitar,” Brian chimed in.  “Yes, exactly,” John continued, pointing at Brian to emphasise his point, “And we had to change shit to accommodate you.”  “It was okay for a song or two but a whole album?” Brian scoffed, “And then we were told you were joining us on tour! Is it gonna happen again with the next album? It’s like your trying to worm your way into a permanent place in this band and we don’t like it.”  “Groupie’s aren’t meant to be on the fucking stage with the band they whore around for.” That was Roger.  “Jesus fucking Christ,” you got to your feet, unable to sit still any longer, “You’re acting like fucking children. You know full fucking well I didn’t organise this and if you really have that much of a problem you can take it up with any of the execs. It was all their idea. Easy way to get my name out there since I’m already acquainted with you.” You paused for a moment to take a breath, “Freddie was fucking right about you. You’re not upset with my performance. You know damn well I can sing and obviously everyone else thinks I’m good enough to be here. No, the real reason you’re all pissed off is that I don't fuck you anymore.” the longer you spoke the louder you got, feeding off the stunned looks the boys were giving each other, “You’re threatened by me because I used to be your groupie and now I’m standing in your spotlight. You’re mad that I’m getting the same sort of attention you used to get from me. Bet you get a little jealous every time you see me with some other guy. Maybe I should take it as a bit of a compliment though, since apparently no one else can suck or fuck as well as me.”  Minutes passed in almost silence, the only sound you huffing as the rage at weeks of mistreatment was released. You caught your breath, and still no one talked. The silence felt like it was closing in on you, pressing against your ears as you waited for one of them to say something in return. When none of them did you brought your hands to your hips and stared them all down, “Nothing to say? Guess that means I’m right. So I’ll make you a deal.”  “A deal?” Brian was trying to act unimpressed but there was curiosity in his tone.  “Tonight. I’ll give you tonight like I used to before you all turned into giant fucking arseholes. And in return you stop bitching about me being here. I’m not going anywhere so either you can accept my offer and be nice to me for the rest of this tour, or you can spend the next couple of months being petty dickheads. No skin off my nose what you choose. Either way I walk away from this one step closer to releasing my own music.”  “What do you mean tonight?” Roger asked, leaning forward in his seat.  “I mean that for the rest of the night I’m yours. You can share me around, do whatever you want with me, treat me like your own personal slut. And then tomorrow you’ll be nice to me. You’ll complement my singing instead of picking apart my performance. You’ll keep your rude comments and name calling to yourselves. And you’ll accept that I’m playing with you until we get told otherwise. Deal?  The three of them looked at each other. Clearly that was the last thing they’d expected you to say.  “Well? Are you in? Because if not I’m happy to try breaking down the door instead.”  “Knees. Now.”  “Jeez, alright Rog,” you rolled your eyes at his sudden shift, “d’you want me to call you Sir as well, or will my silent obedience suffice?”  “God she’s got a mouth on her,” John said, stalking towards where you stood in the middle of them all, “think it needs to be filled.”  “You always did like my mouth, didn’t y-” you were cut off by the way he grabbed your face in one hand, fingers and thumb pressing into your cheeks.  “Bitch has got an attitude problem,” he announced to the other two before lowering his voice and speaking directly to you again, “Now kneel like you were told to, so we can fuck it out of you.”  You nodded as much as you could, cheeks aching under his firm grip. He held you for a moment longer, staring at you as if he were daring you to talk back again, before he let you go. You fell to your knees instantly, looking up at him as he undressed methodically. You would have helped him tug his pants off except that Roger moved to kneel behind you, holding your wrists firmly behind your back while he leaned into your ear.  “You can call me Sir if you like. Daddy works too, know you get wet just saying it. Whatever you choose I hope you’ll remember to keep being good for us, love. We’re gonna use you every single way we can think of tonight. Show you how frustrated we’ve been with this whole situation.” The hand he wasn’t using to pin your wrists moved over your body, making you breakout in goosebumps as he teased your nipples through the fabric of your dress.  “Remind us what your safeword is,” John said, stepping closer as he lazily stroked his dick.  “Saxophone,”  “Saxophone. Good. Now open wide,” he tapped the tip of his cock against your lips and you took him in. Roger’s grip on your wrists tightened as your hand twitched, your instinct to wrap your fingers around John’s cock trying to take over. Instead you had to content yourself with bobbing down his length, pressing your tongue to the underside as you adjusted to him.  “Good girl,” he cooed softly, “gonna deepthroat me like a proper whore.”  You hum caught him off guard and he bucked his hips into you. The gag you made in response ruined any chance you’d had of taking your time to adjust, sending John into a frenzy and encouraging him to make you gag again and again. Before you knew it, he was holding your head steady as he fucked your throat, unrelentingly. Between John’s grunts and Roger’s hand, still toying with your breasts, you were completely oblivious to Brian. So, Roger releasing your hands and Brian yanking one of them up over your head, was a complete surprise. You placed the other against John’s thigh as Brian nudged your open palm with his semi-hard cock, rubbing himself against you until you closed your hand around him. Your position made it difficult to jerk him off properly, but you could feel him getting harder as he rutted into your hand. Roger took advantage of his now free hands, trailing both down your body and onto your thighs before dragging them slowly up and under the skirt of your dress. You could feel the sequins around your hem scratching lightly over your skin as the material was pushed to bunch up around your waist. You jerked your head back, releasing John with a pop as Roger rubbed your clit over your underwear. He stopped too soon, making you whine, and instead placed a hand on the back of your head.  “Thought you said we could do whatever we want with you. Don’t recall anyone saying you could stop,” he pushed your head forward again until you were once again gagging around John, “now this was your idea so you’re gonna be a good whore and take what we give you.” He gripped your hair and pulled you back before shoving you down again, all the while talking in your ear, “John wants you to swallow so you’re gonna swallow. If we want you to beg, you’ll beg. Whatever we give you, you will take and you will thank us for it. We’re going to use every inch of you. We don’t care how prettily you sing for everyone or how much money you make for the execs. We only care about how well you take our cocks, understand?”  You had no hope of responding as John resumed thrusting into your mouth but Roger didn’t seem to mind, more concerned with feeling you up. 

John’s hands replaced Roger’s on your head, his grip tightening as his orgasm drew closer. Each jerk of his hips had you gagging, mascara ringing your eyes where tears had clung to your eyelashes and been blinked off. He came with a string of grunted curses, filling your mouth, and ordered you to swallow before he let go of you, streaks of bright lipstick left in your wake. Brian gave you the few seconds it took for him to move in front of you and kick off his pants before he was grabbing your hair and pulling your mouth to his cock. With both hands free you clung to his legs, creating small, crescent shaped indents on the back of his thighs. You only noticed Roger’s absence when John, sunk to his knees beside you, his fingers taking up where Roger’s had been, prying your underwear away from you for long enough to shove his hand inside and run his fingers along your slit, pausing at your clit to rub it softly.  “God you’re fucking soaked,” he laughed, “Don’t know why I’m surprised. You came up with this little plan way too quickly for it to be spur of the moment. I think you’ve missed being our fuck toy. Probably been looking for an excuse to present yourself to us like this. I think you like being used by us and I think you missed having your holes full of us. Missed how we taste, how we make you feel,” his fingers pressed harder against your clit briefly before shifting back to the softer touch, “I think the spotlight of the stage can’t compare to the rush you feel knowing you’ve been a perfect whore for us.”  You whined around Brian earning a panted laugh from him,  “That’s right, slut,” he said from above you, “keep making those sounds. Know you want me to cum in your mouth. And all it does is prove us right.”  John pushed a finger into you, and another of your whines was muffled by Brian, burying his cock in your throat, holding you with your nose pressed into his pubic hair. A shiver ran through your body as your dress was unzipped, falling open to expose your bare back. Your chest tightened, screaming for air, and you frantically tapped on Brian’s thigh. He let you go, reeling backwards with a final gag as he slipped from your mouth and you were free to gasp for air.   “F-fuck,” you managed to choke out as your dress was unceremoniously pushed off your shoulders and down your arms. Brian was still in front of you, hand sliding up and down his shaft as he readjusted his other hand in your hair, pulling your head up a little higher.  “Close your eyes and open your mouth,” he growled, holding you still. The last thing you saw before you shut your eyes was his hand speed up, working himself to release his load over your face. Some of it landed on your tongue but more splattered over your cheek and chin.   Brian chuckled as he ran two of his impossibly long fingers over your chin, pushing the cum up to your lips. You dutifully sucked on his fingers but a loud bark of laughter distracted both you and Brian. 

“What the fuck are you doing carrying lube around in your jacket, Rog?” John was collapsed on the floor in a fit of giggles.  “What? Thought that girl with the big arse might show up again tonight, wanted to be prepared.”  “You’ve been wearing the jacket all day, how long has it been in there?”  “Not that long, Crystal got it for me after the show. But y’know,” he pushed on your back between the shoulder blades until you fell forward onto your hands, “you wanna make fun of me, you won’t get to fuck her arse.” He brought his hand down onto your backside, making you jump. You felt your dress being pushed up to your waist, and your underwear being slipped down your legs until they were tangled around your knees. There was a brief pause as you heard him unzip is his pants. The next thing you expected to hear was him popping open the lube, but instead he eased into your cunt. He went slow but it made your breath catch in your throat all the same. Once he was buried in you as deep as he could go he began to pull out again, almost all the way before he snapped his hips forward, driving back into you hard.  “Oh, fuck,” you gasped, letting yourself collapse on your arms, resting your head against them. You could feel the last of Brian’s cum smearing across your cheek and onto your arm as Roger continued his slow pace. You’d almost forgotten about the lube until you head him flick open the tube. It was cold against you when he squirted a generous amount over your arse, carefully using his fingers to begin stretching you out. You moaned, the combination of his fingers and his cock pushing you steadily closer to orgasm. But not fast enough. You moved your arm, slipping it under your body with the idea of rubbing your clit until you came.  “Would one of you stop her?”  John grabbed your arm and pulled it back before you could get your fingers where you wanted them.   “No, please, I need more,” you whined, shifting your other arm out from under your head. Brian grabbed that one, both of them pinning your wrists out in front of you.  “Please let me touch,” you said into the carpet, trying to wriggle free of their grip. Roger brought the hand that wasn’t occupied down on you again, drawing a yelp from you.  “Told you we were gonna show you how frustrated we’ve been. So you don’t get to cum that easily. If you’re good you’ll be rewarded.”  He picked up his pace, rolling his hips into you faster, making you cry out though he wasn’t angled quite right to hit your g-spot. Without warning he pulled his fingers from your arse and you found yourself being yanked up, Roger’s hand wrapping around your throat to hold you against his chest. You could hear Brian laughing as your eyes fluttered shut and you moaned, only for Roger to squeeze your throat and cut it off. For a moment you floated there, willing Roger to just make you cum, but the sound of a chair being dropped in front of you brought you back to the room. John sat down and leaned forward to grab your tits, tugging on your nipples until you winced.   “Y’know, going bra-less was completely unnecessary in that dress. Just more proof you wanted to whore around for us.” He said as he used his hold on your nipples to pull you away from Roger’s chest. Roger’s hand remained tight on your throat as John slid his cock between your breasts, using his grip and the motion of Roger’s thrusts into you, to push them up and down his shaft.  “She likes it when you call her a whore. Fuckin’ squeezes her cunt.”  “Is that right, huh? You want to be our pretty cumslut that badly? Good. We’re gonna cover you in it. Gonna fill you so full of spunk you won’t be able to move without it dripping down your legs. And you’re going to beg for it, aren’t you? Go on, beg roger to cum in your pussy.”  “Pl-ease, Roger, please cu-m in my pussy.”  “More,” Roger growled as he rammed into you again and again, rapidly heading towards his climax.  “Pl-please cum in me Rog. I nee-ed it. Want, want to fee-l you fi-ll my pussy.”  Roger slammed into you twice more, hard, holding himself balls deep in you as he hit his release, grunting, voice strained as he told you what a good whore you were. 

You whined as his softening cock slipped out of you and he moved aside. But you didn’t have time to miss the feeling of being filled too much before Brian was placing his arms under your shoulders and lifting you to your feet. John stood and pushed your dress and panties from you completely, leaving you naked. You let them pull you around, barely able to concentrate on anything other than the ache between your legs and the tight coil in your stomach that felt like it could spring loose at any moment. John pushed himself onto one of the tables, legs dangling over the edge as Brian lifted you up too. You were unceremoniously dumped on John’s lap, his hands pulling you until you were lined up with his cock. He swatted at your thigh. You squeaked and sunk down onto him, rocking against him.  “Where’d that lube go?”  There was some shuffling noises from somewhere behind you followed by a triumphant, “aha!” and then John was grabbing your hips to stop you as Brian came closer. When he spoke he was right behind you, his breath on your ear sending a shiver down your spine.  “Since Rog was so good as to stretch you out for me, shouldn’t have any problems taking my cock,” he turned and spoke over his shoulder, “Thanks Rog.”  “Yeah yeah, whatever,” Roger said, voice distorted by the cigarette between his lips.  You leaned forward, wrapping your arms around John’s neck as Brian spread your cheeks and began easing himself into you. John teased you the entire time, rolling your nipples between his fingers as he told you how hot you sounded whimpering like you were. By the time Brian was fully sheathed inside you, you were panting against John’s shoulder, desperate for one of them to move properly. You squirmed between them, trying to encourage them to fuck you but neither was having it.   Brian slapped your thigh, “Hold still. You’ll get to cum once you’ve proved you can be a good slut for us.”  “I will. I am. I promise I’ll be the best slut you’ve ever had, please just fuck me.” You whined, lifting your head up so they could all hear you properly.  A chorus of laughter followed, even as you continued to beg. You were cut off mid word as Brian pulled back and plunged into you again, starting slow but rapidly picking up speed. John leaned back on one hand, his other resting on your hip, letting you rock forward on his cock with every one of Brian’s thrusts. It was by no means the first time you’d ridden John or the first time you’d let Brian in your back entrance, but you’d never had them both at the same time before. You were left completely breathless, feeling fuller than you ever had in your life. Brian was in your ear, breath coming hard as he semi-coherently grunted his thoughts about how fucking tight you felt and how much he’d missed fucking you like this. His hands were all over you, trying to find the best way to hold you as John did the same, occasionally knocking each other out of the way. The closer to the edge he drew, the tighter John held you, pushing himself to sit up a little more so he could grip you with both hands. It was intoxicating, feeling both of them practically fighting over where they could touch you, hold you, the almost innocent skin to skin contact making you burn up. Your own moans were rising in pitch as Brian slammed into you repeatedly, each thrust making your clit drag against John’s pubic bone. You shook as you finally came, feeling Brian still behind you, shooting ropes of cum into you as he groaned in your ear. John dropped his head to your shoulder as you clenched around him, swearing as he came.   “Shit,” he gasped as his orgasm subsided, “Was planning to cum on your tits. Pussy just felt too good though.” 

You could feel the mix of his and yours and Roger’s cum dripping down the inside of your thigh as John gingerly helped you off the table.   “Does that mean she’s ready for me again?” Roger asked, grabbing your hair and yanking your head back. You whimpered as he spun you round, pushing you to bend over the table. He wasted no time, plunging into your arse as you balled up the crisp white tablecloth in your fists.  “Like you best like this, a fucked out whore, all placid and obedient. No more snarky fucking comments. Just holes begging to be filled.”  You cried out as his fingers found your clit, relentlessly determined to push you over the edge again. Cum dripped out of you with every shift of your hips, little drops hitting the floor between your feet. All you could do was whine and moan as Roger ruthlessly used you, gasping and groaning himself.  “Attagirl,” Roger gently cooed when you came, shaking. He slapped your arse again as he drew closer to the edge, leaning his whole body weight on you as he fell over it. He removed himself from you and helped you to stand, catching you when your legs began to give out. You were gently lowered to the floor where you lay down, arms spread wide, breathing deeply.  “You look good like this,” Brian said, kneeling beside your head, “Makeup all smudged, sweaty and dripping. You look used.”  “You laughed softly as he lifted your head and shoulders, propping you up so you could lean against his knees.  Roger reached out to brush a sweaty strand of hair from your face, “Are you okay?”  “Yeah,” you cleared your throat to make your voice stronger, “Especially since you’re all being nice to me again.”  “Sorry we were such pricks, promise you won’t hear another bad word from us. Unless it’s well deserved.”  Before you could respond John was dropping beside you, a jug of water in one hand and a handful of paper napkins in the other.  “Sorry, door’s still locked so we can’t actually get to the bathroom or anything. But I found these on one of the tables, if you wanted to clean up.”  You thanked him, dipping the corner of one napkin in the water and taking it straight to your face, scrubbing to remove the remnants of Brian’s cum from your cheek.  “Hang on, love, missed a spot,” Roger said, taking the napkin from you and swiping at your chin. You could tell he was trying to be as gentle as possible, smiling at you when you thanked him. Brian’s fingers found their way to your arms, trailing soft, calming lines up and down your skin as you relax into him. John did a similar thing over the calf he’d knelt beside, although it felt less deliberate than Brian’s movements.   “Do you want some help cleaning up the rest of it?” John asks, pointing vaguely between your legs, cheeks still slightly flushed from the exertions of the previous few hours.  “Jeeze Deaky, give her a chance to recover before you try and get started on round...what are we up to?”  “Bugger off, that’s not what I meant,” John says, shoving Roger slightly. He turned to you, “I swear it wasn’t. You just look tired.”  “I know, John,” you reassure him, “but I think I’d rather do it myself. Sensitive and all that.”  Brian dipped his head down, pressing a soft kiss to your temple, “None of us have said it yet but you were wonderful. Firstly, for suggesting it and also for taking it all so well.”  “Y’know it’s a bit of a shame you didn’t add to the mess, Brian. Could have had all three of you leaking out of me.”   “There’s still time,” Roger said, grinning mischievously at you, “technically you did promise us the rest of the night, and if I’ve gotta hold my tongue around you for months then I’d like to get as much use out of you as I can.”  “He’s right, you did say all night. And I’m certain we could find plenty of other ways to keep you busy.”  “Are you guys serious?” you said as you tilted your head back to look up at Brian, “You really wanna go again? Now?”  “Don’t worry, we’ll need a bit of time to recover first.”  “Perhaps,” John said, leaning in slightly, “Once we get out of this room, we can take you back to the hotel and figure out what else to do with you. Personally I’d like to see your tits painted with cum, but I’m sure the other two have ideas of their own.”  “Might have to stuff your panties into your cunt to stop any more from dripping out of you.” Roger said, voice low and rough, making you clench your thighs together.  “I guess I did say all night,” you said, trying not to sound too excited, “but this means I get to write a song on the next album.”  “Don’t push it, love. Just because we’re being nice doesn’t mean we’re over it.” 

By the time Freddie remembered to come and get you the four of you had redressed and cleaned up the mess you’d made. He’d opened the door to find you sitting around talking and laughing.  “Well this is different,” his voice drew your attention, “Thought I’d come back and find at least some evidence of a fight. But instead, no yelling, no broken chairs, no black eyes.”  “We came to an agreement,” you said shrugging, “They’re going to play nice from now on.”  “Y/N you common hussy, you fucked them all didn’t you? You know that’s not the sort of bollocking I meant.” 

#queen smut #queen imagine #queen fanfic #roger taylor smut #brian may smut #john deacon smut #roger taylor x reader #brian may x reader #john deacon x reader #my writing #im sorry its so late!!!! #but i hope its worth the wait

[lincolnonline]

a material world - self para

who?: lincoln clarington-smythe where?: wmhs / lima mall when?: monday, november 23rd about?: link completes his annual closet re-stock, just in time for gaga vs. madonna week. after all, he is a material girl.

Link had this day planned out for months. He had been counting down the days in his Lisa Frank calendar, waiting for the chance to march into the mall with his dads credit card in hand.

He had even gone as far as to ensure his outfit for the day was as lowkey as possible in order to gain more satisfaction from the new wardrobe, choosing an all-black ensemble and pairing it with a simple ( by Link’s standards ) belt with a few statement chains and some black boots.

The joy he felt that morning when his dad has offered to give Link his credit card and drop by the mall after class was unparalleled by anything save for the joy he felt when he was able to locate Swift the snake, going to down on a rat in the back of the school cafeteria. While Link knew his dads didn’t exactly get him, he had never felt judged by them either. They were aware that their son was a mix of their worst qualities and was a modern day homosexual Sharpay Evans and they had themselves to blame, there was no point in fighting or denying it.

Placing his books back into his locker following his last class of the day ( World Religions, total snooze-fest! ), Link couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face as the final bell of the day rung.

Quickly taking out his bag and closing the locker door behind him, Link felt a buzz from his back pocket. Fishing out his phone, he was greeted with a notification for a DM from some random sophomore at Dalton, reading; ‘u free tonite?? heard u were a good fuck lol’. With a displeased eye-roll, Link dug into his pocket once more, this time pulling out his headphones and pressing play on his ‘sex yeah!’ playlist. He was worth more than some one-off hook up with a guy who probably only heard about him through the Dalton Gay Grapevine.

Some boys kiss me, Some boys hug me, I think they're ok.

Making his way down the school hall, back-pack slung over his shoulder and the drum-machine  beats of his favorite Madonna song playing, Link walked passed the choir room, not even giving a look in the general direction of the Glee club. He had his mind focused on bigger things today, and sectionals took a big ole’ backseat. He had already given his amazing song-list suggestions, he had fulfilled his team-work quota for the week as far as Link was concerned.

If they don't give me proper credit I just walk away.

As he pushed open the front doors of the school, Link was greeted with the sight of his fire-red Audi, parked in its usual spot in the staff carpark that he had been able to finesse his way into getting via some nicely worded emails from his lawyer dads. Going to public school wasn’t a dream come true by any means, but he was enjoying the perks that being rich, sexy and talented gave him among a sea of people who were…not so rich, sexy or talented.

Clicking the button on his car keys, Link slid into the driver’s seat and pulled out his favorite pair of sunglasses from the glove compartment before putting the car into reverse and making his way to the.

They can beg and they can plead But they can't see the light.

Link marched up to the check-out, throwing down racks upon racks of clothes onto the counter, giving the woman working the register a smirk before flashing his credit card and handing it over. He was prepared to up the sales numbers for every store the Lima Mall had to offer, and he was doing it happily. Capitalism be damned.

'Cause the boy with the cold hard cash Is always Mister Right.

 As the woman scanned away and bagged up all the clothes, Link let his attention shift elsewhere, noting a group of teenage girls walking out of the change rooms at the back of the store, standing around and taking pictures. He recognized a few of the faces, they were from Crawford. Perfect.

“Hi, excuse me,” Link said with a faux warmth to the employee now attempting to fit a pair of shoes into a branded plastic shopping bag. “I was wondering if I could, ugh, how do I put this? Rent your change rooms for the next hour or so?”

The woman looked at Lincoln incredulously for a moment before Link cocked an eyebrow and looked back down at his credit card, making it clear he was more than happy to pay for her services.

“Hey ladies!” He called to the girls at the back, and they looked up, curious, before their eyes widening at the growing stack of bags in front of him. “Impromptu fashion show? What do you say?”

'Cause we are living in a material world And I am a material girl. You know that we are living in a material world And I am a material girl.

Dramatically whipping open the changing room curtain, revealing his first outfit, Link let himself fall into a few poses as a member of the group snapped a couple of photos per-his request.

“What next? Sexy teenage vampire or Bratz-Goes-Hollywood?” one of the girls enquired, holding up two hangers. He shrugged off the blazer and tossed it over to a girl in the group before pushing his sunglasses up onto his head and taking a hanger and turning back to the change rooms. “Ladies, the fangs are out tonight.”

Boys may come and boys may go And that's all right you see.

They went on like that for the allotted 45 minutes, taking pictures and blaring music from their phones in order to ‘feel the fantasy’ as Link put it. Looking at his phone gallery to check how a picture that had just been taken turned out, Link’s phone buzzed in his hand and he was greeted with a message from the boy who had DM’ed him earlier, reading; ‘u left me on read?? fuckin ugly ass bitch anyways u look like trash’.

Noticing Link’s sour expression, one of the girls looked up from her phone. “Who pissed in your Gucci? You okay?”

Shaking it off, Link gave a nod and tapped out of the message, picking up the last hanger. “I’m fine. The real question is will you be okay when I blow your fucking minds with this look?”

Experience has made me rich And now they're after me .

Link blew a kiss ( to the best his ability with how full his arms currently were ) towards the group of girls as they headed in opposite directions. “Snapchat me anytime babe!” He called out as they turned the corner and disappeared from view.

He headed down the escalator, feeling the eyes on him as he passed other customers. And how could he not? He looked and felt like a human disco ball, it was fucking fabulous.

As he headed out the doors and towards his awaiting car, Link froze and his smirk dropped, eyes wide. “Fuck, how am I gonna fit this shit in my car...”

'Cause everybody's living in a material world And I am a material girl!

#tag. self para

[fart-gate]

SGA

Season 5 episode 11

Notes by me

- PREVIOUSLY - Daniel (bimbo #1) precious archeologist babey has entered the discord, him and Rodney (bimbo #2) found a secret lab with weird devices and got kidnapped bc of it (typical). They were forced to turn on one of the devices and it started disintegrating wraith ships whenever they tried hyper space!!! Uh oh!!! .....todd is mad. Atlantis tried to gate out but the gate blew up and all my kids are in danger and im stressed!!!!!

- anyway

- worried!teyla

- I heard a groan and trust me I know johns groans

- glass in johns back 👀

- he was lying on top of radek to protect him 😩😩

- watch out people. Pissed off half bug man coming through

- while the theme plays i will voice something that has been bothering me for the past few episodes. Where the FUCK is Sam

- shirtless!john on my screen👀

- "wheres McKay when you need him" Daniel has died and come back so many times that nobody is remotely concerned about him anymore lol. So far ive heard like 3 ppl say theyre worried about Rodney and nobody has even mentioned Daniel LMAO hes the cockroach of the stargate program and they all know it

- how did Rodney figure it out so fast damn

- "5 bucks to anyone who can contact the deadalus"

- todd is losing his touch if he thinks that atlantis would put theyre own gate in jeopardy???? Like hello??? They go through all the trouble to make sure both parties can benefit from the truce and then double cross him???? Does he think????

- hes more than 10000 yrs old YIKES

- you know as much as I dont like Woolsey I dont want him to die...

- MEANWHILE ronon and keller are off to a great start 👍

- you know ronon is actually really smart....and they use it when you least expect it.

- bodyguard ronon 🔥

- larrin??? Oh boy

- I cant get over how casual Daniel is about this lol

- when Rodney steps in front of Daniel to protect him 💕💗💕💗💕💗👌👌

- this pirate lady is hot

- "larrin would have come yourself but you know..."

Its ok john she'll fuck you later

- ronon walking around blasting things, not even knowing what hes shooting

- this big metal people are being asshats.......not that they werent asshats already

- "jennifer" aaaahhhhhhh

- she faked him out lol!!!

- hey we got a great shot of ronons ass. Hate to see him go but love to watch him leave👀 🍑

- "what are you" thank you finally

- HOLY FUCK ITS THE ASGARD OH MY GOD. HOLY SHIT

- OF ALL THE SHSIABSJSBS I WOULD NOT HAVE GUESSED ASGARD !!!!

- I had to pause it to process gimme a sec

- research on humans? Oh right theyre asshats I forgot

- listen you stupid little gray bitch, just bc the others are dead doesnt mean they were wrong

- 🙋 i trust the fifteen yr old

- hearing john talk about Daniel makes me think about what an episode with just them would be like 🤔💗💗💗

- "we had to escape to a planet with a toxic atmosphere"

"Oh! That sounds nice."

Hes giving me Jack Snark

- is todd good now im confused

- Daniel getting chucked into the room and losing his glasses👌 we never see him lose his glasses enough

- "I think i figured a way out!"

"Really?"

His liddle face

- "Mentally Unstable Like A Fox" Rodney my guy ......what does this MEAN

- why is Rodney the leader of Team Bimbo

- "omg dont kill me you need me!"

"Rodney!"

"Us! you need us!"

- are they gonna wear the suits pls say yes

- john still begging for larrin to come to atlantis and fuck him

- theyre wearing the suits!!!

- Collision Imminent

- ah the ol' Set Ship On Collision Course And Then Bail trick......

- Daniel and rodney together is just a constant sass fest

- woa using the hyper space window to get away!!!! Badass 🔥🔥🔥🔥

- Daniel hit by electricity !!!!!!

- worried!Rodney

- what is this sad piano music is he dying Again

- micheal shanks acting 👌👌✨✨✨

- no no no no no

- beamed!!!!

- when in doubt, blow it up!!!

- "I'll look for a can opener"

- john:

- "interested in somebody else" AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

- embarrassed!ronon

- AWKWARD AS HELL

- hospital!Daniel ❤❤❤

-daniel grateful to rodney for saying he respects him 😍😍😍

- "so you only give compliments to the dying???" I cant stand them

#somebody stop me i took way too many notes with this #stargate atlantis season 5 #whump #daniel-kidnapped-threatened-manhandled-thrown-noises!-struck by electricity-hospital scene #rodney-fear-threatened-worried #john-glass in his back-noises!-shirtless shot of glass shards in back- only lasts a few minutes. #does horny!john count as a tag #im so glad we got 2 whole episodes with daniel !!! and it was such a great story too #sad about the wraith tho :( #the asgard is a twist i did NOT see coming AT ALL

[therainroguefanfiction]

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 025 [Top Two]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,581

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“You should see me in a crown. Your silence is my favorite sound. Watch me make ’em bow, one by one.” Billie Eilish, “You Should See Me In A Crown”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Umm… why the heck are you all here?” Ochaco cried out, distress clear in her voice. Dozens of students were crowding around the outside of our classroom, whispering and taking pictures of us. What, are we a fucking exhibit at the zoo now?

“Do you students have some sort of business with our class?” Iida questioned.

“Why are you blocking our doorway? I won’t let you take us hostage!” Mineta cried out. As if that short idiot could do anything.

“They’re scouting out the competition, idiots.” Bakugo headed for the door and I followed, slinging the strap of my bag over my shoulder. “We’re the class that survived a real villain attack. They wanna see us with their own eyes.” He stopped at the door, narrowed eyes scanning the students. “At least now you know what a future pro looks like. Now, move it extras!”

I chuckled. Typical Bakugo. To think that one word changed our relationship. I wonder, would we be friends if I hadn’t learned who he was?

“You can’t just walk around calling people extras just because you don’t know who they are!” Iida complained, waving his hand frantically.

I raised a brow at him. “The fuck you talking about, man? He calls everyone extras, even the fuckers he does know.”

“So this is class 1-A?” A boy with a mop of purple hair pushed his way to the front of the group, a black-haired boy close behind. This kid over here lookin’ like Doc Brown’s reject son. “I heard you guys were impressive, but you just sound like an ass. Is everyone in the hero course delusional or just you?”

“Sick burn, bro.” I snickered.

“Shut up, bitch!”

“How sad to come here to find a bunch of ego-maniacs.” The boy rubbed the back of his neck.

“It’s tragique.” The black-haired boy nodded.

“I wanted to be in the hero course, but like many others here, I was forced to choose a different track. Such is life. I didn’t cut it the first time around, but I have another chance. If any of us do well in the sports festival, the teachers can decide to transfer us to the hero course. And they’ll have to transfer people out to make room.”

Several people grew nervous behind us, Izuku included. While I don’t doubt the validity of his statement, I think the only people at real risk of being yanked from class 1-A is Invisigirl and the perverted Grape. I can’t speak for class 1-B, though, not that that has anything to do with us.

“‘Scouting the competition’?” Purple continued. “Maybe some of my peers are, but I’m here to let you know that if you don’t bring your very best, I’ll steal your spot right from under you. Consider this a declaration of war.”

“Heh~ but we‘re the egomaniacs, right?” I scoffed, meeting his dull purple eyes. “Ever heard of the expression, ‘The pot calling the kettle black’? Besides, if you weren’t good enough to make it the first time, what makes you think you can replace people that were good enough?”

His eyes narrowed.

The black-haired boy beside him scoffed. “You guys are whaq with a q.”

“‘Whack’ isn’t spelled with a fucking q, you twat.” I responded.

“It’s reserved for special cases like you!”

“Are you stupid?”

“I’m lucid sometimes.”

“Hey, you!!” A silver-haired boy joined the fray, pushing and shoving his way through the crowd as he screamed at the top of his lungs. “I’m from class 1-B next door to you! We heard you fought some villains and I came to see if that was true! You’re just a bunch of brats who think you’re better than us!!”

“Goddamn. And I thought you were loud, Bakuhoe.” I scowled, rubbing my temple. I could feel a headache starting to form from the sheer volume of his voice.

“Talk all you want, it’ll just be more embarrassing when you’re K.O’d!!”

Bakugo moved forward.

“Don’t you ignore me!!”

“Dude, where are you going?” Kirishima rushed forward. “You gotta say something! It’s your fault they’re all hating on us, Bakugo! You, too, Winchester!”

“The fuck’d I do?” I muttered.

“These people don’t matter,” Bakugo responded, simply.

“Huh?”

“The only thing that’s important is that I beat them. Let’s go, Tiger.”

Kirishima sent me a pleading look and I shrugged. “You got what you wanted, Kiri. He said somethin’.” I followed the blonde as he moved through the crowd, the students jumping away from his glaring red eyes.

“Hey!! I’m coming for you!!”

“Hopefully quieter next time,” I muttered, folding my hands behind my head. “I’m hungry, let’s go get tacos.”

“Fuck no. We’re getting ramen.” He glanced at me. “And then we’re going to train.”

I scowled. “You always go to that place that serves only spicy ramen. I hate it.”

“Your quirk is fire but you can’t even handle spicy food. Pathetic.”

“My quirk ain’t about sweatin’, fool. And I never agreed to train with you, either.”

“Too fuckin’ bad,” He suddenly stopped, shoving his finger in my face. “Me and you are gonna destroy all of those damn losers and then I’m gonna thoroughly beat your ass in the final, you got that?!”

I sweatdropped, looking away. “That sounds like a lot of work, man.”

“Suck it up, weakling!”

Geez, once this brat sets his mind on something, there’s no stopping him. This is gonna be a serious pain in my ass.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“I’m home,” I muttered, pushing the door open and kicking my sneakers off before heading to the kitchen. “What the fuck are you doin’, bro?”

Aizawa grunted in annoyance. Both of his thickly bandaged arms were out of their sling, a cup of instant noodles dangling precariously between them. “You’re late,”

I took the cup from his arms, holding up the plastic bag in my other hand. “Sorry. Bakugo’s a real bitch when it comes to training. And everything else in general.”

He fell into the chair at the kitchen table. “You’re training with him?”

I pulled two plates from the cabinet, dividing the box of chicken bites between them before adding a spoonful of mac-n-cheese, green beans, and mashed potatoes with gravy. I set both plates on the table before getting a Dr. Pepper for myself and some juice for him. “I didn’t want to, but he wouldn’t stop bitching about it and then he smacked me when I wasn’t looking, so I humored him. Then I actually got into it and lost track of time.” I plopped down beside him.

Due to his excessive injuries, Aizawa needed someone to help him out at home and since I wasn’t able to protect him from the bird brain fucker, I told Toshi that I’d be staying with Zawa ’til he recovers. The man in question certainly wasn’t happy about needing to be helped, especially not by me, but the alternative was the loud-mouth Present Mic, so he settled.

He was struggling to pick up the fork so I grabbed it for him, holding it up so his finger could wrap around the metal. “I’m surprised he’s gotten so close to you. I don’t know if that’s a good thing, though.”

“Probably not, but at least I’m finally starting to socialize, right?”

He stared at me blankly.

“Tough crowd,”

“What are your plans for the sports festival?”

“Care to be more specific?”

“Are you going to give it your all? You haven’t shown much interest in going pro.”

I leaned back in my chair, stirring my mashed potatoes with the fork. “Dunno. I’ve been thinking about it… everyone is so hyped for the sports festival, so I feel like I should match that by giving it my all, you know? At the same time… everyone else has a clear goal, a dream to become a pro and this is their big chance to get noticed. Well, one of ’em, anyway. Kinda feels like I shouldn’t take that away from them. Plus…”

“You’re scared,” he commented, dryly.

I scowled, propping my chin in my palm. “I ain’t scared, I’m worried, there’s a difference. I don’t wanna hurt anyone, especially if this is gonna be like a one-on-one battle royale or whatever. Bakugo has this shit idea in his head that the two of us are gonna be the top two – with him taking first, of course. I kinda wanna beat him just to spite him, but that’ll cause me a bigger headache in the future. He’s pretty damn strong, too.”

“You don’t think you can beat him?” He stabbed a piece of chicken, bringing it to his mouth.

I shrugged. “Won’t know that unless we fight. I feel like my raw power is better than his, but I rely on instinct alone, while he relies on instinct and intelligence. I’d rather not fight him if I can avoid it, it’ll be too much of a pain in the – Ow, that fucking hurt, you bitch!” I rubbed the back of my hand which he had just stabbed with his fork.

“Stop being lazy, Jen. Whether you plan to go pro or not, as a student of U.A. you represent the school through your actions.”

“Isn’t that even more reason to air on the side of caution?” I scowled. “Think about how shit it would be if I lost control during the sports fest. Talk about an image ruiner.”

“Are you planning on killing anyone?”

“The fuck kinda question is that? Of course not.” I paused. “Though, I wouldn’t be above killing Mineta, not even gonna lie. If I have to fight him, I’mma destroy him.”

He ignored my last comment. “Then you should be fine.” His eyes met mine and his gaze softened. “Just do your best and stop stressing so much.”

“Hey, Zawa?”

“Hmm?”

I chewed on my lip, thoughtfully. Should I tell him about that voice I heard back at the USJ? No matter what kinda world you live in, hearing voices ain’t a good thing, but… it was probably just a hallucination brought on from the extreme stress. I don’t wanna worry him or bug him, especially when he’s still healing. I smiled softly, “You always act tough but you’re just a big ole softy, ain’t ya – ow, fuck, Aizawa!”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

The day of the sports festival had finally arrived and the stadium was packed with people. Various food stalls had been set up outside, including a glorious taco stand. Me and the rest of class 1-A had been ordered to change into our gym uniforms and hang out in the waiting room until we were called out, but I had woken up late and missed breakfast. Plus, tacos.

While the others nervously and excitedly chatted with one another about the sports fest, I slipped out of the room and out to the front where the food stalls were located. My mouth started to water at all the glorious smells teasing my nose, my stomach growling and whining at me. I stopped behind a woman with a small child, trying not to tap my foot impatiently as she waited on her food. Finally, she stepped away and I moved forward.

The man at the stall was older, maybe late fifties or early sixties, with a mess of gray hair. A thin, white bandana had been wrapped around his forehead, the name ‘Shimatsu Tacos!’ written in bold red lettering with a taco between the two words.

He smiled kindly, wrinkles appearing around his mouth. “What can I get for you?”

“Five soft shell tacos, please.” I dug around in my pocket for the money I had shoved there after changing out of my uniform.

“Coming right up!” He hummed as he started to cook the beef and toast the shells.

“Hey, you!” An arm slung around my shoulder and I scowled at the contact, slapping my palm against the woman’s face and shoving her away from me. Her hand grabbed my shoulder, refusing to let go. “Hey, what are you doing?!”

“Don’t fucking touch me, rude ass.” I stomped my foot down on hers and she finally let go.

“Ow, that hurt, you brat!” Her purple eyes narrowed at me as she clutched her foot, blonde hair bouncing as she hopped on the other foot.

“Don’t fucking touch people without their permission.” I folded my arms over my chest.

“Listen here, you little -”

“Mt. Lady!” A man grabbed her wrist before she could grab me. He looks like… a leafless tree in a tight blue one-piece. ‘Kay, then. “You can’t attack a student, what are you thinking?”

“This brat attacked me.” She huffed.

I rolled my eyes. “I stomped on your foot because you grabbed me and wouldn’t let go. Get over it.”

“See! She admitted it!” She pointed an accusing finger at me. Bitch, are you five?

“You shouldn’t have grabbed her,” Woodsman scolded before turning to me, softening his voice. “And you shouldn’t attack people.”

“Che,” I looked away from him, turning back to the old man as he handed me my food. Each taco was wrapped separately and all of them were placed in a small, cardboard container.

“Here you are, enjoy!”

“How much do I owe you?”

“Not a thing!” He grinned, giving me a thumbs up. “Just do your best in the sports festival!”

I hummed as something behind him caught my eye. “Hey, can I have that?”

His eyes followed mine and he seemed to realize what I was planning to do. He laughed loudly, taking it down from the peg it hung on and handing it over to me. “Good luck, kid!”

“Thanks,” I sent him a smile before turning toward the stadium.

“Wait a minute! I’m not done with you!” The woman grabbed my shoulder. “You need to learn some respect, kid!”

I scoffed, slapping her hand away. “And you need to learn to keep your hands to your fuckin’ self. Respect is earned, it ain’t given freely, and you ain’t done shit to earn my respect so fuck off, old lady.”

“O-Old?!”

Hmm, how annoying. I weaved my way through the crowd of people, munching on one of the tacos as I re-entered the stadium. I pushed open the door to our waiting room and stopped short as the tense atmosphere.

“- Of course you’re better than me.” Izuku was saying as he faced Todoroki. “In fact, you probably have way more potential than anyone in the hero course. That’s why you got in so easily.”

Fucking rude, you little shit.

“Midoriya, maybe you’re being a little hard on yourself. And us…” Kirishima spoke up, holding his hands up. He was clearly trying to defuse the situation.

“No, he’s right, guys! All the other courses… they’re coming for us with everything they’ve got. We’re all gonna have to fight to stand out. And I’ll be aiming for the top, too!”

“Fine,” Todoroki responded, his voice ice cold.

“Sheesh, you guys are a couple of edgelords, ain’t ya?” I commented before taking another bite of the taco.

“Winchester! Where did you disappear to?” Kiri asked, his eyes snapping to the food in my hand. “Hey, where did you get that food? And where’s mine?”

“Food stand,” I answered. “If I share with you, I’d have to share with the whole class and I ain’t about that life. Sorry, bro.”

He sweatdropped.

“Um, Jen-san?”

“What, Izuku?”

“…why are you wearing a bandana around your forehead that says ‘Shimatsu Tacos’?”

“Don’t question my fashion choices, you little shit.”

“R-Right…”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

▸ Forward

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[darkarfs]

Street Hunter

A film so mired in obscurity it doesn't even have a Wikipedia page. One of several films I own that never even got a bootleg DVD release, and you can probably only watch it if you find a Portuguese subtitled version on Dailymotion, or own the VHS and requisite VCR. Before we dive into this film, I should mention that the only reason I own this movie in the first place is that, around 2010-2011 (a simpler time, really) I became stone-cold obsessed with the career of one Reb Brown. Reb, for the MST3K set, played David Ryder in the South African railing-kill-fest that was Space Mutiny. You know, that guy. Tall, beefy, had all the acting range of an airhorn, looked kind of like a retired football player? He's actually had a storied, odd career, one that traverses a lot of genres and a lot of roles. Mostly, he did Italian knock-offs of movies like Terminator, Predator, Rambo, that sort of thing. A lot, and I mean a LOT of war movies, mostly ones taking place during Vietnam. But then he was also in things like Uncommon Valor with Gene Hackman, the Howling 2: Stirba Werewolf Bitch with Christopher Lee and Sybil Danning, and was actually the first ever Captain America, even before that really goofy one with Matt Salinger in 1990. And for some reason, I was more than entertained by watching him do what he does, and what he tends to do more often than not is...well, yell and fire machine guns into the jungle. He does that...a LOT. And he's in this film! But first, if I may reflect for just a moment. As soon as I put this into the VCR, it gave me the sneak previews of other movies made by the same distributor. I'm not a nostalgia sucker, I don't agree with things being better in the old days. But I genuinely, truly miss these. The previews on DVDs are always for the big blockbuster releases, but the ones on VHS? Who fucking KNEW what you were getting! The previews on B-movie VHS tapes are often how I found the next movie I was gonna watch! Turns out, tho, that the first preview was for the aforementioned 1990 Captain America with Matt Salinger. The 2nd was for a movie I really wanna check out now, though, and it's a ream of unconnected nonsense called the House of Usher, with Oliver Reed! This was before bad movies became that self-aware kind of bad. As a friend of mine once said; anyone can knowingly shit their pants, that's not funny. A person *not realizing* they shit their pants...that's comedy. The hero's name is Logan Blade, a name up there with Snake Plissken and John Matrix for "most action-hero name of all time." Not played by Reb (he's actually the weird, semi-warped villain in this piece), but instead by the late Steve James, who usually ended up playing the hero's sidekick in a lot of movies like this one. And you'd probably recognize ol' Frank Vincent, aka the White-Haired Guy with the Black Eyebrows in Every Movie About the Mafia. The movie starts with a bunch of heavily-armed garbage men raiding a gravesite to steal a mountain of cocaine from a guy’s casket. And they’re led by...John Leguizamo?? Yeahp. That’s him.

The guys kick over a tombstone that is 100% made of styrofoam...(one guy’s foot is all it takes, and I wish I could gif it, because it bounces)

and then are suddenly flanked by a bunch of Italian mobsters. Turns out Leguizamo’s gang are Colombian drug lords, and they’re here to steal the mob’s cocaine from this grave. The Italians have them surrounded, until Luigi’s group is flanked by 7 more dudes, led by...

Ah! There’s my dude. He immediately shouts and he and the goons shoot them all dead. THEN Logan Blade shows up, and I gotta admit, he looks like a seriously legit, badass dude.

You know, you’re kind of destined to become a renegade cop or bounty hunter with a name like Logan Blade. You don’t run into many wedding photographers with that name. He takes out all of Luigi’s goons and takes him in alive, and then maybe the weirdest, most sincerely funny thing about this film to me.

An 80s action movie where the police chief and the renegade bounty hunter...get along great! Like, uncharacteristically well! “Dammit, Blade! The mayor’s been all over my ass about those 6 bodies you left in the cemetery! You’re making my WHOLE department look great! You keep this up, and I’ll promote your ass to lieutenant so fast it’ll make your head spin!” Then we meet Blade’s friend, an avuncular grey-haired guy who may as well say “I’ve reunited with with my wife after 3 years and the guys at the precinct are throwing me a giant retirement party tomorrow” for how quickly and seamlessly he telegraphs the fact that he’s next to die. He calls Blade “paranoid” and insists that he “worries too much.” Gets shot in the next scene, and frees Leguizamo’s character (named Angel, should have mentioned that.) Reb cautions Angel that he should “always follow orders.” Y’see, Reb his basically a mercenary who stone-facedly pines for the days of the greatest generals, your Alexander the Great, your Genghis Khan, your Napoleon. He even tells Angel that “you should be as Philotas was to me, Alexander the Great.” (Alexander the Great had Philotas falsely accused of an assassination attempt and then had him beat to death with fucking rocks. Your references won’t get past me, movie!) Then we get to maybe my favorite scene in the entire movie. The Diablo gang send a crew of 3 guys to assassinate Blade’s girlfriend, which will either make him surrender in terror, or drive him into an insane murder fury.  Now, I have real issues with this in films, when someone kills the girl to get to the guy. Happens in all the big action films where the good guy is muscling in on the rival gangs or the mob or whoever. She’s being held by one guy, and defiantly spits in his friends’ face. My face fell the first time. “Oh, no.” I thought.

He goes to slash her face with a switchblade...

...she ducks, and he accidentally slits the other guy’s throat. She then takes out the one guy with a candle holder, and the third...well, thank God she was using a cast-iron pan to cook...something...when they show up. She throws the hot food in his face and then bashes his head in with the pan. ...my man Reb has not trained these men well.  But it turns out, a cop was on the mafia’s take! (This guy was in one scene, eating a donut, not a single line. You’d never have guessed a man you’d assumed an extra would be working for Don Hermano!)

So they take his girlfriend, and then Blade gives chase...

...in what looks like a 1979 Ford Econoline. Not exactly great for catching bad guys.

...unless he had a fucking HYPERDRIVE installed. What?! Yeah, okay, I’m on board! Blade closes in on the corrupt cop and Reb, who are...where else? A warehouse on the outside of town. Blade brings his dog, a nameless Doberman (he never calls it anything but “boy”) to help the fact that he’s outnumbered. Reb then tells one of the bad guys to “shoot that mutt!” I again braced myself to be disappointed and sad. The bad guy fires three shots and misses with all three as the dog runs away. He turns to Reb. “Sorry, jefe,” he says.

Reb immediately shoots him in the head. Got a genuine laugh out of me. A thing used by the villain 3 times in Sudden Death as a punchline just made me sad. Here, actual laugh. Dunno how these things work, but I imagine it’s a matter of tone. There’s some weird, “what we saw in ‘Nam” undercurrent through the whole movie. It’s what hardened Blade and made him a bounty hunter, but also what made Reb the general-worshipping lunatic merc he ends up being. It’s not but touched on, but I guess it’s as good a theme as any for a hero and a villain in one of these movies. The problem I have with this now...is that the movie ends really anticlimactically. Blade disposes of the goombas and the diablos in basically one fell swoop, and then challenges Reb to a one-on-one fight. He handily whoops Reb’s ass (a little disappointing, seeing how all he does is talk a great big heaping game about how the generals inspired his military tactics and how he fights) and then...leaves. No, really. Blade wins the fight and then leaves Reb behind. Reb goes to find him, but it turns out Blade has, for no reason, a block of C-4. Dunn where he got it. Reb trips over it, and it literally makes a squib-like “PUFF!”

and he falls through what amounts to a perfect square hole he was standing on. Blade essentially set up a trap door for him, and then Reb just stepped on it.  Blade punches Angel, restrains him, and then...the movie just kind of ends.

A movie with a lot of promise, but with an ending I couldn’t help but find flat. But they used by boy Reb real well, and that’s got to account for something. 

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 024: Todoroki VS a Giant Robot

Previously on BnHA: All Might told Deku to use the sports fest to become one of the popular kids. Deku was all “but I’m not sure if I want to be a popular kid.” All the other kids in U.A. came over to start some shit with class 1-A. Bakugou was all, YOU GUYS SUUUUUCK, and then this one guy with raccoon eyes literally declared war on them. The other 1-A kids were like AHHH BAKUGOU WHAT DID YOU DO but he was all I’M AIMING FOR THE TOP and fucking everyone was like WHOA and then they all trained and now it’s the day of the fest! Also Todoroki came up to Deku and was like let’s be rivals and Deku was like... ... ....YES.

Today on BnHA: Bakugou ad-libs the Athletes’ Oath. The sports festival kicks off with an obstacle course. Class A gets right into it. Todoroki fucks up some robots. Deku prepares to go fucking apeshit on this thing.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 44 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.) 

fucking go figure that the instant Japan’s population suddenly gets superpowers, they immediately do away with the Olympics and are all, “TIME FOR THE FUCKING HUNGER GAMES, BITCHES”

class 1-A is entering the arena first! well, they fucking earned it. and also they come first alphabetically. but they still fucking earned it

Deku is all OH SHIT THERE ARE PEOPLE HERE WATCHING

and Iida is like yes there are indeed a copious number of homo sapiens gathered here to observe our participation in this grand and glorious spectacle today

Kiri is like BAKUGOU HEY BAKUGOU LOOK AT ALL THE PEOPLE WHAT DO YOU THINK, BAKUGOU

Yamamoto. Yamamoto to Bakudou’s Gokudera. I love it and it’s a fine, fine thing

Bakugou you should be more grateful that you somehow have one friend now

so like seven other classes are coming out now, and then they all gather for the oath!

IT’S THE MADAME

“THE R-RATED HERO MIDNIGHT” OH MY GOD

WOW they sure can get away with a lot in Shounen Jump these days, huh

I mean, you go and do your own thing though, Midnight!

is her power r-rated. sob. I’m. actually really curious loll

WHOA WHAT

WHAT DOES THE STUDENT REPRESENTATIVE DO AND WHY IS IT HIM AND WHEN WAS THAT DECIDED

DEKU’S FACE LMAO

“must be because he placed first in the entrance exam” ah okay

what does the student representative do though

ahhh he’s climbing up to the stage

BAKUGOU’S GOING TO LEAD THEM IN THE OATH OMG

if it’s like the Olympic Oath then it’s going to be really earnest and idealistic and so weirdly out of character for him then

yeah boy you stand up there with your hands in your pockets and do this

...is this the oath

SOMEHOW I get the feeling it’s not lmao

THIS IS WHY YOU DO REHEARSALS FOR THESE THINGS U.A.

everyone is booing him and he’s like flexing up there on the stage and this fucking guy

and meanwhile Deku is standing there thinking deep thoughts about him

oh my god Deku you can’t keep doing this without warning

JUST WRITE A FUCKING FANFIC ABOUT HIM DEKU. GO ON AND WRITE YOUR KACCHAN META. YOU PROBABLY ALREADY HAVE ONE DON’T YOU. IT’S PROBABLY IN YOUR FUCKING NOTEBOOK RIGHT NOW

just. I can’t believe Deku is out here doing my fucking job for me jesus christ

but anyways. what the fuck kind of athlete’s oath was that lmao

and they’re all just shrugging their shoulders and getting on with it. well okay then

so @alessandriana tells me this arc will have some good Bakugou moments, and what with it starting off like that, I can’t wait to see where this is all gonna go

(ETA: THAT WAS A SURPRISINGLY DEVASTATING TWIST AT THE END)

also I’m interested as to what kind of superhero sponsors he’s going to attract (if any) with this kind of plucky FUCK YOU GUYS IMMA WIN THIS THING attitude

the qualifiers! let’s goooo

OOH AN OBSTACLE COURSE

whaaat the fuck lol. “a race between every member of all eleven classes.” like, all of them at once? because that basically IS the hunger games if that’s the case

can you even fit that many people on an obstacle course all at once

a four-kilometer lap around the stadium... exactly how big is this stadium

after a couple minutes’ research, I learned that MetLife Stadium in NJ has a circumference of 2 miles, so this is bigger than that. and MetLife is pretty damn big. no wonder Deku was intimidated by the size of the crowd

so basically the rules are “do what you want but stay on the course”

they could literally start murdering each other or some shit. well, like I said. hunger games

everyone’s lining up for the start and shit’s getting tense

Deku is crouching forward looking all serious and remembering what All Might said about announcing to the world, “I AM HERE”

is he gonna attempt to use One for All again? because he will fuck up his legs, unless he managed a miracle in training these last couple of weeks

“realistically speaking, I still can’t regulate it... to a reasonable extent” well that answers my question. except not really

“that’s why I have to overcome it” yeah, you just stand there and think vague things then, Deku. guess I’m not gonna get a straight answer out of you huh kid

light’s turning green!

here comes a fucking stampede

so exactly how many kids die in this event every year I wonder

where’s exit sign Iida when you need him

hmm Deku seems to be noticing something about the starting gate. probably that it’s the first obstacle

Todoroki is not fucking around lmao

best to just let him get on ahead. he’ll only fuck you all up

Bakugou and Iida should also be pretty fast here though

oho, Aizawa’s sitting next to Mic in the commentary box! and he’s still all bandaged up!! wow, he hasn’t healed yet after two whole weeks... this truly is a different kind of shounen

uh oh here comes the circus

”half and half” lmao

I see Aoyama is up to his usual glorious nonsense

Kirishima should not be fast enough to keep up with the rest of class A with his power but look at him go anyway

I BELIEVE IN YOU ALL, GODSPEED

also when will Homestuck and Birdman get to actually do something anyway??

and I am taking note of that “sizzle” fx coming from Homestuck, which is not helping me to narrow down her mysterious powers at all. I bet it’s clearer in the anime, but I’m kind of worried about spoiling myself now

(ETA: surprisingly it was not clear and I’m still not sure what the hell it is that she creates even after watching that whole arc. it looks like acid, maybe? but who fucking knows.)

OCHAKO SAYS SHE CAN’T BUST OUT HER SUPER-SECRET MOVES YET. SHE HAS SUPER-SECRET MOVES?!

OHO WHAT’S THIS

methinks someone may possibly have a mind control quirk! I was waiting for someone to have a mind control quirk!

Todoroki is impressed by the number of people who made it past his ice blast

were you just planning to freeze all 160 kids there Todoroki

Mineta is trying to do something. Mineta has forgotten that he’s cancelled

better

now what the heck was that thing

ehh? these are the robots from the entrance exam? how cheap and lazy, U.A. I want some Harry Potter obstacles. like dragons and sphinxes and shit

oohhhh but if we can’t have that then I guess I will reluctantly accept Todoroki vs a Giant Robot instead

actually that’s like three giant robots

actually that’s like... uhh... you know what, we’ll just say that it’s a lot

lol the kids from the other courses are like “the hero course kids fought THOSE?” yeah that’s right. show some damn respect

oh that’s right, Todoroki and Momo haven’t seen these before

[SLAMS HAND ON TABLE] RIGHT???! FUCKING RIGHT, MOMO!!!??!! YES, EXACTLY, SOMEONE OVER AT U.A. HAS EITHER A ROBOT-PRINTING QUIRK OR A MONEY-PRINTING QUIRK I SWEAR TO GOD

it would be so fucking funny if everyone got real quiet and turned and stared at Deku expectantly, waiting for him to do something. obviously it won’t happen but just the thought of it made me chuckle

but this time we’ve got good ol’ Frozone here, so

yeah they cheaped out on us Todo

hi hello, um, what

I immediately pictured dad being like an ice dude and mom being a fire gal. so basically like Daenerys and Jon Snow

(ETA: lol got it backwards, but basically)

Todoroki is now freezing the giant robot with ease

lol the other kids are hovering behind him just letting him take out all the obstacles for them

uh oh he doesn’t seem too keen on that

Todoroki did you just. crush a bunch of fifteen-year-olds

well that will certainly hold a number of them back. but probably not anyone from 1-A, or that mind control guy

Deku you were still that far behind?? get moving kiddo

all the robots are staring him down again

I wonder does it count as using his power against someone else if he uses it against a robot

I know it didn’t work the first time, but that was literally the first time, and it was before he knew the microwave trick

go punch some robots Deku

what kind of a face is this. no seriously. it’s like he has absolutely no idea what he’s gonna do, but he’s not gonna let that stop him. haha, well okay

BONUS:

HARVEY BIRDMAN

so you went for 4 syllables on both your first and last names, huh buddy. well then, I’ll go with “Fumikage” for now, since I’m gonna get “Tokoyami” mixed up with Todoroki I think

(ETA: in the end I was forced to memorize “Tokoyami” since that’s what everyone uses. let me tell you, it was exactly as difficult as I predicted. but I did it!)

“favorite things: dimly lit places” wow

(ETA: actually this now makes sense, kinda? except he said that while darkness makes his power stronger, it also makes it harder to control. which sounds scary to me but I guess he’s into it?)

“I personally think this guy is cool beyond cool” yeah I’ll say. dimly lit places. just sitting there in those dark corners eating apples while music from the Cowboy Bebop soundtrack plays

#bnha #boku no hero academia #makeste reads bnha #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #todoroki shouto #goddamn this arc started out so badass and then punched me so hard in the feels at the end #not gonna lie I loved it though

[mr-kym-blog]

WHAT’S HOT  F-ING ROCK HARD HOT.

YOLO you soy beta bitches! It feels like only a week has gone by since I last wrote. In reality is has been a year. A full year...what have I been doing you ask? 

Well I’ve been travelling all over the world discovering fashion looks and trends in places we didn’t even know existed. I was basically a Cuck in the jungles of Poor Costa Rico...Nicaragua. I saw looks that kept me up at night, I saw looks that made me feel bright and I saw looks that made me think I was high as a flying object on a string. In fact I usually was fucked up on some sort of powdered version of a plant. When I didn’t have enough resources for that, I would just eat bat shit. Also known as Guano, and I’d wash it down with some Guava Juice. 

Needless to say I have been learned and learned you soy beta chuck fucks, and happy to be home. With out further ADO I present to you a look I found in the deepest darkest parts of Chile, as much as it was as F - Fest it was a look at this look fest. 

So there I was just minding my own business slapping some rocks making some fine azz tunes in the mountains and taking a big ole steamy dump when this majestic young man crosses my path wearing what I can only describe as an article from gods closet. 

Needless to say I had sex with the man on the mountain side and here’s a D.I.Y of this bad boy.

D.I.Y

1: Let’s start with the head. This looks like a version of the sleeping pillow you see business man using on a plane or an old person uses when they sit down. What...normal seats aren’t good enough for you old person? Your’e in your third age and decided that the normal seats were for the first half life folk? Ya well fuck you old person...fuck...you.

So this hood can be made easily from 4 small intestines of a common sheep. 

Go to a farm where sheep reside. Knock on the door of the farmer, spin a tale of woe and earn yourself a sleep over. When the farmers sleep, go ahead and light a fire in the house. Run outside with a hammer or piece of wood and hit a couple sheep down dead. 4 to be exact because this hood takes 4 sheep’s to make. Have fun with this part, go ahead and make it ritualistic. Full moon helps, a sacred knife and a slab of stone, some Slayer.

Once the intestines are acquired, don’t forget to thank your guests. 

2:  As soon as you get home put the intestines in a blue dye, don’t have a blue dye you say? Go buy one at the local Dollar store. 

3: Steal grandma’s wig for this next bit. Black is ideal but any wig will do. If you can find a wig, just collect hair from the hair brush. Everyone has a hair brush so don’t be afraid to take what they don’t need. Don’t forget to kiss grandma on the lips and make sure she’s tucked in with some soothing Christmas music. 

4: Steal some sewing supplies from grandma or an ex. I recommend visiting your ex unexpectedly, this way you can catch them doing something no body wants to see. 

5: Simple...sew the intestines to the wig and or brush hair. My friends you have just made yourself a hood to this god type article of Chilean fuck clothing.  

Side note...make sure you droop the hood as much as possible to show off chest or high nipples. This goes for men and woman. Nipples are just nips people. Some do look weird...

6: Let’s make us a bottom bit to this bit. Believe it or not folks...this furry looking sweater can be made with a simple tar and feathering. I like using a simple asphalt from any local construction zone. Walk up and offer the construction person a Fresca and then when they are taking a break. Roll around in hot asphalt. Make sure you have no shirt on, this is meant to stick.

7: Once you are covered in the black stuff, go source a chicken. I recommend whoever inherited the farm you burnt down. Go there and there are bound to be chickens. Pluck them while alive to make sure they have an opportunity to grow their feathers back. It’s about looking good and being humane. 

8: The sleeve bottoms are simply sheep intestine remains. 

WELL there you have it...this look is sexy...easy and fucking worth it. 

Remember when you’re getting laid because you look phenom it was yours truly who put you there ;) 

#whatshot #loveforfashion #comedy #hobby #fashion #highfashion

[hogwartsgrapevinexx]

The weather is getting warmer, the birds are starting to chirp and the students of Hogwarts are currently fucking like rabbits at the moment. Really, it might be easier to tell you who isn’t rolling around in the hay with one another but what fun would that be?

Let’s start with Evan Rosier. Honestly, it feels like the guy just came out of no where and now he’s the talk of the town. He’s gone on a few dates with Narcissa Black and the frigid ice queen has actually bestowed a kiss on Prince Charming. Let’s hope he doesn’t turn into a frog at midnight. Although he does like to jump from bed to bed it seems. First with Veronica Greengrass and recently Alecto Carrow and Evan have been seen disappearing into tents to and running from the kitchens naked and covered in chocolate. As if thinking about all of those calories they ingested isn’t gross enough, I have several sources telling me that Bellatrix Black has also thrown her hat into the Evan Rosier ring. Something about spring time makes even the craziest bitches want the D. 

It turns out the Narcissa Black and Veronica Greengrass  have a lot more in common then they think. Good looks, Slytherins, big old fat lesbian kisses and now they’re sharing the same penises. Not only with Evan Rosier but with good ole Mick McLaggen. Just when I think he couldn’t find another woman to fill his dance card, good ole Cormac surprises me again. Also don’t think I haven’t seen you eyeing up Andromeda Black, McLaggen. Is she your next victim?

Although this time Mick was seen with Veronica Greengrass in the prefects bathroom. Although Veronica disappeared suddenly around Mick during class, I can only imagine what those two were up to. Have you ever heard of shagging in a bed, McLaggen?

Speaking of not shagging in a bed, our favorite Gryffinslag, Dorcas Meadowes and Mick McLaggen disappeared in the woods during the lame bonfire thrown by the Gryffindor girls (I include Glenda Chittock in the label of lame and Gryffindor girls because can we even tell her apart anymore?). Pretty much everyone saw Mick fuck Dorcas up against a tree and you can blame it on the fairy dust as much as you want, girl, we all know you cannot not have sex in a public place with Cormac. And we thought Emmeline Vance was desperate.

Big shout out to Alecto Carrow for drugging everyone and attempting to bring about change to the snooze fest. Usually I do not condone drugging people without their consent but when it comes to these crazies, you’ve got to do what you’ve got to do.

Once again, Marlene McKinnion and Lucius Malfoy are starting to date and like most couples at Hogwarts, they’re starting to get boring. Luckily the drugs were around and it was almost sweet to see Remus Lupin all over Marlene McKinnion. Now that is a ship I can get on and sail. I bet Remus and Marlene could have freaky sex all night. Of course, Remus isn’t the only marauder that Marlene has been seen all over. She was spotted dragging Sirius Black to the hospital wing, maybe she broke his penis? That must be awkward since Sirius is supposed going all monogamous with Mary MacDonald. Another snoozefest if you ask me. Although I wonder if Mary knows you were snogging Emmeline Vance the other night, Sirius?”

On the other hand, Lucius Malfoy and Severus Snape were getting all hot and heavy. Body shots were involved people. Use your imagination.

I never thought I would say this in a million years but even Rodolphus Lestrange has been getting some action. With Veronica Greengrass. Of course, he’s sharing his action but let’s be honest, the kid is going to take what he can get. It was almost overnight that Rowdy Roddy went from capital of the he man woman shouldn’t play Quidditch club to asking Veronica to stick things up his ass. All I can say is good for you Roddy. Maybe Veronica will soothe the pain of being demoted to second best friend to Malfoy?

Now as much as I can’t stand Dorcas Meadowes and her infatuation with with quidditch bro’s, I can’t help but throw a few claps her way. She went on a date with Sebastian Rosier, got free food, a new Quidditch broom and didn’t even put out. I mean, it’s only a matter of time until she does sleep with him. Come on people, it’s Dorcas Meadowes.

Still, it was just a great reminder that I really need a sugar daddy. 

Poor Henry Davies, once again faces rejection. If only he would realize that I am the one for him. Really, Glenda Chittock doesn’t even deserve him so he honestly dodged a bullet on that one. She went on a date with Angelo Fazio, just to rub the salt into poor Henry’s wounds. I hope she gets pregnant and has a baby with a unibrow. Indigo King is another member of the Angelo Fazio fan-club, having easily moved on to “I wish I was a man” Lupin. Not that I can blame her. They even got a room at the Three Broomsticks. Scandalous. But good for you girl, finally finding a man who can really shag. 

Anyway, just want to give out a quick shout out to all my readers who love hearing the unbiased news of all our favorite people at Hogwarts. 

Happy Spring Folks! Remember to keep your eyes and ears open, lest you miss Amycus Carrow and Stubby Boardman disappearing into a tent again. Together.

xxx

[thatbookcritic]

+α no Tachiichi

Title: +α no Tachiichi

Media: Manga

Author: Yuu Geni

Criticism written by: Kai

Editor: Julie

The Review:

Howdy folks! Kai here, back with another review for you all! This time, I’ll be reviewing a manga that I honest to god hate and I think it’s a piece of garbage. It truly is a waste of time and I’m only really reviewing this in hopes that I spare all of you guys, our lovely followers, the time and effort in reading it. Now… I’m sure you are all curious as to what this manga is all about. So… let me tell you then.

+α no Tachiichi is another classic example of every other isekai manga. Our protagonist, Satoki Houma, is your typical Japanese high school student who was suddenly transported to another world with her classmate, Haruka Toudou. As expected, the priestess summon them because they were looking for the holy maiden who would save the world from the forces of evil! Just by a glance, the priestess automatically assume that Haruka was the holy maiden because Haruka is a cutie while Satoki is supposedly ugly af. In an odd twist of fate though, it seems like Satoki has the holy maiden powers! Not Haruka! What will our protagonist, Satoki to do?!

Well… if you were guess “prove everyone wrong”, “vengeance”, or “save the day”, then you are very wrong. The correct answer is “Nothing a normal person would do!” As we already established, Japanese heroines are nothing normal. They may look human but they don’t think like humans. And Satoki is no exception to the rule. After being sidelined by everyone in the entire kingdom, tossed around like an object, and overall be treated rather poorly compared to Haruka, Satoki still decided to help Haruka in the end by doing this whole complicated act of pretending Haruka is the holy maiden while Satoki is hiding in the shadow. The reason why Satoki is doing this? A) Because Haruka treated Satoki nicely for ONE time by defending her against the big ol’ meanie knight (but we all know that was a romance flag for Haruka and the knight… basically turning Satoki into an object yet again) and B) Satoki doesn’t believe that she could be a proper holy maiden because she isn’t pretty enough. First of all… WHAT?! These are such stupid reasons that it makes me wonder if Satoki was dropped on her head as a baby. It’s the only possible explanation as to why Satoki stupidly believe in such bullshit. Let’s break down these reasons.

First, Haruka being nice to Satoki is really fucked if you look at it from a different angle. For one, Haruka was only nice to Satoki only once throughout the entire manga. It was basically just so the hot tsundere knight would go, “Oh doki doki. This Haruka girl is different from the rest! She treats both the ugly and pretty the same! What is this feeling!” And yeah yeah, y’all can argue that Haruka never intended that but that’s what the author intended. Satoki was nothing more than a plot device for Haruka’s reverse harem. After that, Haruka just sort of tossed Satoki away to enjoy her little harem and the shower of affections she recieves for being pretty. While Satoki is concern for Haruka’s well being and coming up with all sort of plans to make sure that Haruka’s image doesn’t crumble, Haruka here (who promised to watch out for Satoki might I add) is off dicking around like it’s summer vacation. It’s like Haruka forgets that Satoki even exist and hardly bother to come asking if Satoki is fine or if people are treating her well. Instead, Haruka only seems to remember that Satoki is a person when Haruka needs that “generic best friend side character” to run off to and gush about all her own personal drama and ask who she should chose in her bland love triangle. Like damn bitch, Haruka reminds me of every fake friend in a group. Yet Satoki just eats this shit up, my dudes. Despite being clearly treated as a lamp, this just drives Satoki forward in wanting to “protect her friend!” Being a reader, you just feel so bad for Satoki as you read the two girl’s interactions and how Haruka basically forces Satoki to be a cuck. Oh, did a mention that Satoki is basically a cuck? Besides clearly not receiving any praise for helping fight off the demon army or protecting the castle, Satoki is always awkwardly stuck between romantic scenarios between Haruka and her harem. Satoki would awkwardly be hiding under a table or some shit while she listen and watches Haruka make out with some random pretty boy. Like, Christ Almighty. I don’t understand what’s fun about that? These scenes just hurt my heart because usually what follows before or after these “romance scenes” would be Satoki being berated or treated like an object. It’s like looking at heaven and hell side by side. The comparison is just awful. And it’s not like this is a comedy scenes either. At the beginning of the manga, sure. But then these scenes became serious and down right vicious soon after. Yet Satoki just takes it! What’s even worse, was when the story was at a big dramatic point and Haruka points a finger at Satoki and blame her for ruining things. Bitch says what now??? After Satoki went through all that hardships for Haruka and Haruka putting Satoki through an emotional ringer, Haruka had the gall to call Satoki a bad person and that Satoki manipulated her. The one moment Satoki needed Haruka the most, Haruka turns her back against her. Some “protection” that was, huh?

While Haruka is an awful person and their relationship is fucked, the real problem here is Satoki for putting up with all that and more throughout the manga. Now, there’s nothing wrong in writing a protagonist with low self esteem or lack of confidence. But what’s important is if the author plans to do ANYTHING with those traits… AKA character development. You would expect that from a manga like this but nope! Satoki enter this world as a doormat and left it as a slightly proud doormat. There’s a reason why you don’t make your main character a static character but a dynamic one (remember these vocabulary words from English class?). At most I would imagine having a static character for a one shot or a short story, but a full on manga? Nah son. That just ain’t right.   

Having Satoki’s core issue be about her looks is just fucked and honestly shame on the author. At the beginning of the manga, we see that Satoki doesn’t really believe in that issue 100%. Yes… she might say it at first by going “Oh, there’s no way I could be a protagonist because I’m not pretty enough!” But this seems more like a self deprecating joke more than anything. Satoki might believe it just a little but not entirely. We can see it by how she wanted to first speak up to the priestess when Satoki first realize that she has the holy maiden’s powers. But as time went on, how the world treats Satoki just hammered in these insecurities and made Satoki submissive to all these actions. The world turned “Ha ha ha. I can never be a protagonist because I’m not pretty enough!” into “What’s the point? My looks define me as a person and I can’t do anything about it.” With Satoki’s already doormat personality, it wasn’t hard for her insecurities to become more apparent- Oh my god! Satoki is a dynamic character, she just went backwards! My third eye has been opened. Oh gosh… sorry everyone. This revelation just shook me. The story is still shit though. Let me get back to talking about Satoki.

After reaching rock bottom with her insecurities, it was Satoki’s allies who kept her head afloat in her sea of despair. Well… I guess saying that they keep Satoki positive is a bit of a generous stretch. On one hand what’s Satoki’s oresama teacher who helped keep Satoki’s abilities a secret and (sort of) looked out for her. I guess the teacher would have been fine if he wasn’t such a dick. Every word that comes out of his mouth was just a jab towards Satoki. At least he kept his end of the bargain in watching out for Satoki (I’m looking at you Haruka). Next is the bootleg holy maiden. You see, in the manga, the prince’s younger brother came up with a scheme of making up several holy maidens to confuse people (yeah it was a stupid plan) and there was this chick. Satoki and Ms. Bootleg were forced to work together and eventually they became “friends”. Ms. Bootleg was some vain chick with her own self interest but she does bring up some good points to Satoki for her to self evaluate her life. I guess the teacher and Ms. Bootleg were supposed to prompt Satoki to self evaluate and gain confidence but honestly, they did a shit job and Satoki hardly grew as a person. At most, they gave Satoki the confidence to “do what you want to do” bullshit but in the end, what Satoki wanted to do was to continue helping Haruka. “But she help Haruka on her own accord. The end.” BAH! BULLSHIT.

In the end, I’m not sure what sort of lesson Satoki or we, the audience, was supposed to take away from this story. Anything special about Satoki was just ripped out of her hands by the author. Haruka was the holy maiden all along and that Satoki’s power was just her link to the world. Once Satoki used up all her power, she basically gets sent back home. Hell! Satoki participated in the war but she never got a chance to see who won! What a load of horse shit. Haruka and Satoki’s relationship was easily “repaired” with Haruka forgiving Satoki’s deceit (Bitch, how vain are you???) And everything is now alright in the universe… my ass. Honestly, my head hurt as I recall all this. We started at point A and never left it. Seriously… what’s the lesson, moral, or entertainment value about this? From a writer's point of view, this is an example of cool concept but awful execution. Main character is a static one and all other side characters are just plain hateable. Any “interesting” plot development are shown off screen since Satoki is technically the side character for Haruka’s main character and it was just an angst-fest of Satoki being whipped around like a doormat. I would have more fun watching paint dry… at least I get the satisfaction of the paint actually drying in the end.

Overall Score: 0/10

(Kai’s note: Btw, the art isn’t bad. It’s pretty nice actually and I don’t see why Satoki is “ugly”. She’s a bit masculine but it doesn’t take away much from her look. I also find it annoying that the author never really approach it by having Satoki prove other’s her usefulness or prove them wrong or something. In the end, people just sort of shrug at Satoki’s appearance in the end. Once again, shit story telling.)

#+α no Tachiichi #Yuu Geni #manga #review #opinion #going through this manga triggered me all over again #what a waste of time smh

[brimbrimbrimbrim]

Hi I hate to ask this but I've had the worst day of my life, a sprained ankle and then a car accident. It's been horribly rough. Could I get a small one shot Lucas fic of taking a liking to and comforting a found captive?

Don’t apologize for asking, Anon. That sounds like a terrible day. I hope you recover mentally, physically and financially very soon. Car accidents are terrible and a sprained ankle is rough. I hope this fic helps ease some of the crappy feels that today has given you. Much love for you on your road to recovery.

It started off with Lucas getting bored enough to watch all the VHS tapes he could salvage - ending up with a bundle of his Ma’s collection and nothing else to do. So, he sat around with his thumb up his ass and suffered through Beaches, Titanic and… some stupid Wayne Newton thing while eating bags of cheese puffs and peanuts.

By the end of Steel Magnolias, he felt like someone had ripped his balls off and sewn a pussy on him. All he could think about was cuddling and fawning over a girl of his own, and it made him nearly sick.

He sat around for another two days thinking about what it’d be like to have a girlfriend and jus’…hold hands. Hold hands?! Like he was some fuckin’ prepubescent brat. He wanted to fuck and cum balls deep in some hot cunt, not sit around and hold hands all day. But he did, and so he sat around with a blank TV and a heartache, not knowing what to do with himself.

On the third day of his self-inflicted misery, the ol’ man came in with two bodies.

“Morgue’s overrun, boy. I’m sticking these down in the stalls. They ain’t been fed yet so don’t you touch ‘em, ya here?!”

“Whatever,” he replied, not thinking twice about it cause on account of the goop his brain had become and got a nice crack in the back of his head with a baseball bat for his trouble.

After dear ol’ dad had taken down a charter bus full of shitheels lookin’ to spend the weekend in New Orleans for the big fuckin’ Mardi Gras parade, Lucas got stuck with two captives when the basement started overflowing with new arrivals. Two too many, he grumbled, hearing one of them start screamin’ after only two hours strapped up.

Ain’t nobody got time fer this, he thought.

He had other shit to do (he didn’t), and it wasn’t even like he could use ‘em for test subjects either so what good were they but an annoyance? They’d both been there since this morning, and it only took until now for Lucas to realize one of ‘em wasn’t screaming - hadn’t been since Daddy brought ‘em by.

Typically it wouldn’t peak his interest - the silence - but the last bitch he’d tossed in the rat’s nest had long since turned to bones, and he was bored. The tapes had made him weak at heart, and he couldn’t stand watching another one of his Ma’s sentimental tear fests.

Just the thought was making him wanna puke.

Lucas hunched over his desk, frowned and gave the little joystick a push to the right, panning camera nine over to the quiet one all tied up in one of the horse stalls.

A girl, Lucas noticed immediately. She was quiet, reserved and hadn’t moved much. Without much reason to, Lucas hadn’t gone down since they’d been brought in and secured to their posts. He hadn’t bothered to look at ‘em either since he wasn’t supposed to play with ‘em. Shoulda took a little trip down though, cause the chick looked kind of hot once he zoomed in a bit. Get rid of the blood and dirt, and she’d been the nicest lookin’ bitch to ever get past the gates.

“Ain’t it just peachy ah’ get stuck with a dumb whore in the barn…” he grumbled.  She looked like one too (not really), but guess that coulda’ been the fact that she’d been stripped down to her panties. At this angle, he couldn’t see her tits, but her back was bare, so she wasn’t wearing a bra or nothin’.

Shame - shame he didn’t have a good angle for a free viewing.

His Pa never said he couldn’t have himself a look-see. As long as he didn’t chuck her in the Birthday Room, who cared if he had a little fun? All he wanted was a look and maybe a hug or some snuggles - No! No, he just wanted to watch her heaving tits as he jerked off on the floor in front of her. He wanted to slip his dick between ‘em and… ugh…

Lucas wanted good night’s sleep with a warm body beside him, in all honesty. It got pretty lonely now that he was off the grid more or less - just enough connection established to contact his people and set up communication between all the cameras and speakers. No more porn to toss his rocks off to. No cam girls to watch while he fucked his fist, pretending it was a pussy. And now, worst of all, he’d brainwashed himself into wanting something more innocent than a good fuck. Maybe when the girl down in the barn passed out, he’d go lay next to her…

The girl down in the stall shifted, stretching a long pale leg across a bed of musty hay.

Shit! Where was his Polaroid at? Worse case scenario he’d snap a picture of her and lay in bed looking at it like a freak.

Four upturned boxes and a messy bed later, Lucas was loading up his ol’ polaroid camera with a dozen blanks, fingers shaking. He was only a bit ashamed of how low he was willing to go for some semblance of intimacy, but hell… he was desperate, and it was hard enough keeping his head clear as it was.

It was pretty pointless, but he rubbed his face clean of the blood from earlier and threw his door open. Lucas kicked his heels into the stairs, eyeing the molded that were hanging off the walls. They’re gaping jaws clicked open, swinging towards him jus’ enough to know it wasn’t some escapee running fer the hills. One of ‘em gurgled, gagged and puked up a messy wad of bones as Lucas passed it by.

Easily ignored, when his heart was busy jackhammering at the thought of this girl his Pa had brought in.

The girl was sitting in the stall, a chain wrapped around her waist, connecting her manacled wrists and branching out to the pole she was resting against. She didn’t have much wiggle room, but all in all, it wasn’t as bad as getting cramped into one o’ them dog crates.

She didn’t even bother lookin’ at him as his sneakers crunched over brittle hay, pausing outside the wooden gate. A fountain of pale hair hung down in front of her face, covering the tops of her tits.

“Hey-hey, come on, bitch! Wake up!” He snorted as she jerked but did little else. Only when he growled and gave the gate a hard kick did she swayed. A hint of perky nipple poked out of her thick hair as she lifted her head; blood-matted hair slipping out of her eyes. Blue eyes, like his own, looked up at him, gazing under wet lashes.

She was a hottie, and Lucas was struck half dumb for a good long minute jus’ looking at her.

“My leg’s broken,” she whispered. Pain made her voice throaty, ragged enough he found himself licking his lips, wondering if he should have brought her a soda or somethin’. He palmed his Polaroid, nodding to her with the tip of his chin.

“I’ll set it fer ya if ya give me a smile. I’ll even bring you upstairs and get ya somethin’ to eat. How about that? Sounds like ah sweet little deal, don’t it? Jus’ gotta say cheese!”

“It doesn’t and I won’t,” she said, leaning back against the wooden pole, exposing her bare tits through a curtain of dirty hair, uncaring.

Lucas popped himself a picture without obscuring his view with the shitty glass lens. All she did was blink at the flash and nothing more. No rebuttal, no tears or anything else he’d have expected. Hell, Lucas even had a running shower up there. How could she say no that kinda offer?

Slowly, checking the barn entrance with a narrowed look, he smashed the lock on the gate and swung it open. The noise or the implication made her stiffen over the hay bed. In her lap, she curled her fingers and closed her eyes. Dry, cracked lips, which probably looked pretty full and sexy when she wasn’t dehydrated, mouthed words… no, they mouthed numbers.

Lucas shoved his shoulder into the wooden post as he read her lips while she chanted math equations, solving for X and Y in some weird, brainy coping mechanism. Probably thought he was gonna rape her or somethin’. All the chicks that came through here thought he would…kinda got insulting after ah while.

“Ya forgot to carry the four, sweetheart…” he told her, watching as she ignored him, continuing despite her fuck up.

Kinda interesting. Usually, everyone just begged and screamed for someone to come rescue ‘em - like they were a princess in some wild fairy tale. This one accepted her fate, or at least what she thought was gonna happen, and did her best to prepare for it. Lucas liked that - respected it. And so he yanked the film from his camera, gave it a couples flaps until the badly lit sight of her with those cute tits came full color. He threw the picture at her, snorted when she kept on dividing and subtracting and left her there.

It wasn’t until the next morning that Lucas got itchy again.

All night he’d been watching her through the camera, ignoring the stupid asshat in the stall beside her as he screamed. It was hard to see through the snowy lenses, but Lucas was pretty sure she was still miming mathematics to herself. She didn’t sleep, at least not for more than half an hour maybe. Her unbroken leg would kick or stretch and once he saw her turn her head up towards the camera, staring at him.

“Come and do it already,” she’d say, making his gut churn sickly.

After his ol’ man had come in for the retard with the broken vocal chords, Lucas stuffed a bag of skittles in his pocket, grabbed a can of soda and hopped the stairs to see his adorable brainiac.

She was docile, only watching him, never begging, as he swung the gate open and stepped inside. The stall was narrow but spacious, but Lucas threw himself down beside her despite having enough room to host an orgy if he wanted. The girl tipped her head back and breathed deeply, ready for whatever she thought he was gonna do.

“Skittles?” he offered, shaking the packet near his jaw with a feral grin that made his cheeks ache. He’d forgotten how to smile, so a grin would have to do.

The barest touch of her tongue between her lips made Lucas swallow. In her lap he noticed her fingers twitch.

“…why?”

He didn’t need a reason, but he had one, ‘course he did. Lucas wasn’t gonna tell her, though, so he just shrugged and tore the corner off the packet, shaking a few into his palm. All he needed to do was stare at her hands fer a few seconds before she got the idea and offered her palms to him; shackles clinking. Bruises and bloody scabs ran like bracelets around her wrists.

He dropped a few sickly bright skittles into her palm and watched her wince, trying to put them in her mouth. If he weren’t so sure she’d bite his fingers off or curl her nose in disgust, he’d have fed them to her.

“So, ya like numbers, huh?” He waited for her to say something, but she merely sucked the Skittles in her mouth with half-closed eyes; savoring the sugar in silence.

“Me too,” he sighed, scooting a little closer to her until he just missed bumping her broken leg.

“My Pa said I was gifted when ah’ was younger. But hell! - Guess geniuses go crazy every damn day, huh? Jus’ another one with a bad brain.” It felt better talkin’ to someone that wasn’t Eveline…or imaginary like Oliver had been (sometimes still was). Even if she didn’t talk back, Lucas liked laying back in the barn with her. Nothin’ else better to do anyhow and it was the closest he dared to get to something resembling cuddles. Not that he wanted that… obviously.

“… can I have some more?” she asked, sounding so tiny and small that somethin’ in Lucas started to hurt. He looked up at her from the soft ground, saw how empty her eyes were - like a dead sea - and handed her the whole bag of skittles. The little, hopeless smile she gave him made his chest tighten like there was a hook buried in it.

The only thing that sucked about dosing himself with that serum was all the emotions he had coming back to him. That’s all it was. Could’ah done without ‘em, if he were honest, but the girl ate her candy through the pain, meeting her hands halfway down and somethin’ about giving her that little act of kindness made him wanna do more and more… and more.

For the next two days, he spent most of his time either telling himself not to go down and see her, or sitting with her in the barn, feeding her junk food, handing her bottles of water or talking to her (actually talking to himself, but that was neither here nor there).

Eventually, he went down to see her with a real goal in mind - not just trying to keep her alive. He brought the bolt cutters with him. The ol’ man wouldn’t sweat one little captive - not when he had dozens of ‘em fresh and ready to be hatched. If his Pa said anything, Lucas could just tell ‘im the molded got hungry and climbed the gate. Easy.

She withdrew at the sight of him with the cutters in hand, but still, she didn’t beg or scream. Lucas cut her chains without a word and tore her manacles off as easily as if they’d been clay. When he grabbed her around the waist, careful of the raw red skin where her chains had been, he felt her muscles tighten. Not one to take that shit personally, Lucas tried to smile but ended up grinning and slung her over his shoulder… only then did she scream. He could feel her tears soak through the back of his hoodie and her broken leg bang against his chest.

Lucas tried not to let the sounds of her agony bother him, but they did. Every step made him wince as she bawled her eyes out, shouting and begging him to stop - that it hurt 'it hurt so bad!’

In a few minutes, she’d be right as rain, but the pathetic, sloppy sounds still wedged their way under his skin somehow.

She sobbed when he set her down on his couch, fingers running along her broken thigh like fluttering leaves; listless. Pain lined her body - her face and brows. The lights above their heads highlight the heavy fall of tears that made Lucas feel guilty for some fucking reason. Not like he’d broken her leg…

He grumbled and left her there to her misery as he went to the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of the good stuff for her and his last candy bar. Maybe she’d be more apt to forgive him if he showered her with sugar. Wouldn’t hurt, right? - And he was pretty desperate at that point.

When he returned, she was halfway across the floor, dragging herself towards the door. A long, scattered line of dark blood following her line a snail trail.

“Hahaaaa’ah shit, sweetheart. Where’d you think yur goin’? Ain’t nothing out there but moldy freaks with them teeth waitin’ fer ya,” he laughed at her, hamming it up as his gut pulled when she merely whimpered and pulled herself another few inches across the floor.

Badass, bitch. Smart and sturdy and cute… didn’t find many of those anymore. Not that Lucas would know really. He never did get out much before Evie showed up - didn’t do much talking to girls even before he was labeled the crazy head.

Lucas swallowed and knelt down beside her, pulling at her ankle. She howled, hissed and threw a fist into his face. Took him by surprise, but it was weak and barely did more than sting. He hadn’t meant to pull at the busted leg like that.

Didn’t matter, though. He was gonna fix her, and she could hit him all she wanted if it made her feel better, Lucas could take it even if she broke his jaw. He gave her a hard look and poured the bottle’s cool, slick contents over her thigh.

Those wet blues fluttered closed, as the shit took effect.

“… I can feel my bones snapping.”

Lucas grinned, biting his lip to keep most of the infectious glee inside until he could breathe it back down, “Yeah, how about that? Feelin’ pretty good by now I reckon.”

She twisted at the waist, running a hand over her healed thigh before giving him a calculating look, “I-I don’t understand.”

“Bout what?”

“Everything,” she whispered, pulling her legs in, laying an arm over her chest with a slight blush. Guess now that she wasn’t in so much pain she had enough sense to be embarrassed by her tits hanging free. Lucas liked lookin’ at ‘em, but that free fun was over. If he’d wanted to keep ogling her, he coulda just kept her in the horse stall. Naw, Lucas wanted her - wanted to hug her close and wash away the blood and dirty, pat the wounds dry and kiss them better. It was real fuckin’ sappy and stupid and yet he didn’t bother worrying about it now that her leg was healed.

“T-this,” she started, inhaling brutally as Lucas dared put a hand on his calf, “you can’t kill her, take her away from me like that - you can’t snap my fucking leg in half and throw me in some damn pig pen and… and… and feed me candy like some pet and now this?!”

Lucas frowned, feeling like someone had a knife stuck in his stomach, giving it a good wiggle with each seething word.  She shook and cried silent tears, staring heatedly at him while he sat there frozen, just wanting to wrap his arm around her.

As more grief poured outta her, her lips started to quiver like they were hooked up to car batteries, “That asshole h-he killed 'er and now you wanna… just do it already! Just do it!”

Her fists coiled and like a feral cat, she came at him, throwing a jab at his chest and another up into his chin.

Lucas hissed, grabbing at her wrists and pulled her up over his thighs, keeping her claws out of his eyes as she trembled and sobbed; leaking wet tears down into his lap. The only crying girl he’d helped was Zoe when they were teenagers when some cunt had called her fat during lunch. This was… Lucas tried to stop looking at her tits as they bounced while she cried - sought to halt the boner from growing between his legs as her hair tickled the back of his hands. Her eyes opened wide, stared up at him, and suddenly she collapsed into his chest; sniffling.

“Ain’t gonna rape ya…” he told her; pretty lame sounding in truth, but he wasn’t sure what to do with a crazy chick in his lap, curling her fingers around his sides… hugging him hatefully. Bitch was insane, but Lucas couldn’t ignore the warmth he felt as she held him around the middle, trying to suck some sort of comfort from him.

Lucas found himself wrapping his arms around her, holding her bare shoulders, rubbing her shivering, naked back as she whimpered into his chest. Shit circumstances and all, but Lucas loved every second of the contact. She was warm and soft…

“Shh… Hush, now,” he muttered, doing what his Mama used to do for him when he had nightmares… or scuffed up his knees on the stairs. The words just sorta came out without much thought to it, and before Lucas knew what was happenin’, he was whispering sweet nothings to this chick while she breathed easy against him. There on the floor, he held her, feeling her heart thud gently against his stomach.

It was the first real intimate contact he’d had since Eveline showed up, long before that even…and suddenly he couldn’t get enough of it. Lucas groaned, pulling her up and cradled her carefully in his lap. She only struggled for a second before sinking into his arms silently, breathing slow and gentle. Lucas inhaled the stale, blood tinged smell of her hair, found something sweet buried underneath the dirt and sighed.

“Thanks,” he muttered; lips on her scalp. Down beside his stomach, he felt a soft touch, like a thumb brushing the jut of his ribs and shuddered in pleasure.

If this was how good it felt to be held - to hold - and offer comfort then Lucas decided he wasn’t gonna let his Pa get this one. Lucas was gonna keep her safe and sound, and she wasn’t ever gonna feel pain again. If he had to kill ‘em all… he’d do it, just to keep her from cryin’ ever again.

#ask #anon #fanfic #request #lucas baker #<3 #hope you feel better soon anon #fluff? #sfw

[pattyglover04-blog]

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