#assuming I don't get a new job which I surely won't let's be real is really not any different on a day to day level than here

[lin11a]

After watching Good Omens season 2, I wanted to talk about this :

A lot of people did recently said that Season 2 Episode 2 was a great episode, but didn't understand the food scene, or found any reason this is here. Well, as far as I am concerned, this is actually the best scene of this episode, even better than the end, and I wanted to talk more about it.

Here is the summarized main topic of this flashback : GOD IS "TESTING" JOB WHILE CROWLEY IS "TESTING" AZIRAPHALE ON DIFFERENT LEVELS

This episode has a big flashback about Aziraphale and Crowley that can't be ignored at all, thanks to all of the elements that we learn about how the Heaven/Hell/World work in this story and about our ineffable duo. We can list those like this :

Demons always do the bad jobs. Nothing new, but what it is new is the "permit" that Crowley has from God to destroy Job possessions and family. An angel can't react against this kind of permit. Usually, angels just watch demons do their thing and rather think about the happy ending than the process, according to Gabriel's justification :

If angels let demons do and just stare, Aziraphale couldn't let Crowley do that, even after knowing about the bet. At first, he was not aware about the permit nor the bet, and although he's informed after asking, he just comes back to Earth to avoid the killing of the children by trying to convince Crowley to stop, just after the killing of the goats. It doesn't go too well at first :

In front of this apparently crualty, Aziraphale gives up and is about to leave, BUT notices that the crows around there do not go CAW CAW CAW. He turns toward Crowley and gets from him the REAL staring and honesty he was asking before at this very moment, without any words spoken.

It's important to notice that Crowley turned (twice) toward Aziraphale, so the angel can have his real answer behind the devilish acting he's got to play. Crowley lets the birds go baaaaa on purpose to see what reaction he would get from the other side, or at least, he waits to see the reaction of the angel instead of just leaving. Aziraphale understands that Crowley didn't kill the goats, and assume quickly that the children will be safe.

Crowley is not naive and knows that Aziraphale misunderstands the true meaning of his decision. But he's also enough smart to understand that Aziraphale has a weird behaviour for an angel : no angel would come to Earth reflecting on a decision from God by trying to convince a demon to stop it. It requires at least to have enough consideration toward humans and kids to act like that, which even Gabriel does not have in this story... Aziraphale does have it, and we all know who has it too but doesn't want to show it too much then constantly fails anyway...

He's so bad at being bad that when he sets the children's house on fire, Aziraphale sticks to his positions and remains sure of the idea that the children won't die by Crowley's hand. Icing on the cake : Aziraphale doesn't give up nor go away again : he even goes real close to Crowley this time, sure there is no danger at all for anyone's life, sure that Crowley can't lie anymore or hide under his role if he does that.

Right after in the cellar, Crowley just sees that for once, he's not alone during his duty, and tries to get comfy with what he has in front of him : a wine jar and an angel who has trusted him. Crowley invites Aziraphale to try drinks then food. At first, the angel thinks about temptation from a demon, but the real thing was only about curiosity. Common angels don't have enough curiosity to understand humanity : they often base their knowledge on only ONE experience (like the "birth" of Eve for Gabriel, who considers he's now an expert about human reproduction) or things they've been told since the beginning. From Aziraphale : "demons are bad, angels are good" without nuance. And THIS IS WHY he's not able to understand Crowley completly while they talk about "sides" at the first time.

Aziraphale sees the world as two sides only, but he has this empathic side that can bring him to understand humans, but also and over all Crowley. The thing is Aziraphale never really had the chance to get more interested in something that's not about his own duties, because angels usually are not curious. This is why he mixes up curiosity and temptation. He can't make the difference if he doesn't try anything.

Now, we have Crowley, who doesn't like being a demon at all, who loves questions and curiosity, who CRAVES for answers he might never have... He's on Earth for a long time and do not take his devilish work seriously, because he doesn't understand the point of choosing between demons or angels. He wants to be HIMSELF only. He wants to do what HE thinks is good, and for so long, he never had the chance to think objectively "I'm the one who's right, because I'm just myself and it's okay" without having Heaven or Hell arguing with his way of living. When Aziraphale just came in his life, it’s as if the world has finally laid out a little something, another curiosity, and this curiosity was curious about him as well, even if this curiosity is irritating. But until then, Aziraphale meets several criterias that angels don't have and that Crowley loves.

And what did God do when Job met the criterias to make God wins the bet ? God granted him with presents.

...so why couldn't Aziraphale has his own presents from Crowley, just for existing in his way ? Yep ! Eating is not at all an invitation to sin in this scene to me. Crowley's present to Aziraphale is waaaaaaay different that the presents given to Job of course, but it's undoubtedly more important on his scale. It's not about just a piece of meat : Crowley offers Aziraphale the chance and opportunity to find out, experience and enjoy what Earth can offer to him, even when there is a huge storm outside, even when it seems like the end of time ! He gives him the chance to understand why living on Earth can be beautiful and how human creativity can bring a lot of pleasure and good feelings. Food is the big part of it and the first of course, but after that, we can see that Aziraphale learned to dance (another thing that angels don't do), has a huge passion for books and a full collection of them, likes talking about everything, likes living on Earth near humans more than living in Heaven, etc. At last, it's not important that Aziraphale didn't understand the whole Crowley's elaborate morality/way of living. What's important here is that he's interested to understand, not like other people. Job kept his fey, and Aziraphale kept his trust and open-mindedness to the world. This is also a big present for Crowley, to not feel so alone like before, and also being seen as more than a demon.

Please, just mind this is my interpretation of this scene, and that I really thinks it gives a lot more than what people use to see in it.

#good omens #goodomens #gomens #aziraphale #crowley #bildad the shuite #good omens season 2 #gomens2 #goodomens2 #waiting for season 3 #food is love #azirafell #reflecting

[solo-by-choice]

alright, so would my fave survive castle Dracula? For the sake of @canyourfavesurvivecastledracula I'm doing Josh Lyman from The West Wing myself. Although I've only seen the show once and am not super... sure of my ability to remember enough minutiae to do this but I'm trying anywayyy

uh, no. He'd die. lol.

He wouldn't take the crucifix. He's not a superstitious person for the most part so I think he'd just find everyone freaking out about him going to the castle to be ridiculous. He's also Jewish. If he did take the crucifix, it would be to get the lady to stop bothering him and then he certainly wouldn't wear it.

He is technically a lawyer. I guess. He doesn't practice law, though, and I don't think he ever has. I suppose he could, but you know what let's not get into this because then I'll start questioning what an American from the late 90s/early naughts is doing in this story... (If Josh were from 1897 I suppose he'd be from Europe in the first place, but not England, and I'm having trouble imagining Dracula going to all this trouble to move to idk Poland or whatever.)

anyway

So maybe Josh doesn't make it past the shaving scene.

If he does, I think he might be able to keep alive for a while. He's good at talking; he could keep Dracula entertained as a conversation partner. The biggest issue might be his documented inability to be civil with people he doesn't like. He might be better at faking it with someone who has a (metaphorical) gun to his head, but we have no data on that kind of situation.

I doubt he'd put up with Dracula's weird touchy-feely habits. I'm not sure what he'd do about it, but I just don't think he'd be as fun to toy with as poor Jonathan because he wouldn't have Victorian manners preventing him from calling Dracula's behavior out. Which of course means Dracula won't put up with him as long.

If anyone's expecting him home on time, it's Donna. And presumably his boss is either Leo or Bartlett. (Sorry I'm thinking too much about transposing the cast of west wing into Dracula rather than assuming everything is the same in Josh's life which I think is how you're supposed to do this. So whyy is the deputy white house chief of staff bringing real estate paperwork to a count in Romania? oh nvm) Unfortunately I'm betting none of these people know shorthand, so Josh can't try and send them secret messages.

I do think Donna would recognize any letter that wasn't written in Josh's voice, but what good would that do them?

Does Josh get eaten by the Girlies? I guess the real question is whether Dracula saves him. I don't think Dracula would find Josh as fun a plaything as he did Jonathan. By this point Josh has probably started loudly demanding to be allowed to leave, is climbing the walls in boredom in every way but literally and has read every English book Dracula owns and taught himself basic Romanian. Josh's no genius, but he's smart and has the energy level of a working dog. He needs enrichment! Anyway Dracula probably thinks he's really annoying and maybe he lets his roommates bite him.

Unfortunately for him, Vampire!Josh is also annoying. But if they could get past that, Josh could do a great job running Dracula's take-over of his new country. Wants to be the guy the guy relies on, after all. America won't know what's hit it.

#tww #dracula #goofyness #i tried my best! #i think josh would be fun as a vampire and not just bc of my gay crush on him #getting this finished before you disappear for lent!

[anotherrosesthatfell]

What if Cross kidnapped Lux when she was a baby and gave it to Alphonse as in exchange, he'll adopt Merciless because in the book you did wrote Cross want to take Merciless with him after the contract end.

WHO ARE YOU- 🤨🤨🤨🤨 okay but this is an oddly interesting what if timeline- ahem anyway—

Killer in this timeline will surely hate Cross guts. Sure Cross did took Merciless into a better place but come on..- that's her son :'D. Then one day Merciless got replaced by baby Lux like that's wild! 😭 Fortunately enough, she couldn't hate Lux and pretend Lux is Merciless because heck- that poor woman mental health 💀

Angst will still be alive since he only died because of Palette birth and he still haven't meet with Merciless since Merciless was 3 when Cross took him away. So he assumed that Cross and Killer had an affair because Lux look like Cross. Plus Killer seem to adore Lux. He gets weird that Alphonse also adore Lux but as long no abuse, it's fine.

Crescent in the other hand also don't know that he has a brother will think Lux is his real sister.

Alphonse, LMAO HE'S A TOTAL FOOL FOR LUX- like Alphonse did have favorite subordinate which is Cross and he got Cross's daughter? He couldn't be happier (Damn I think he's gay for Cross). Plus in the storyline, Alphonse did like Lux became she is smart and good at making deals.

For Lux, she won't really be the villain and I don't think the game will happen in here because Lux will be raised with love from Alphonse and Killer. Plus her new brothers too-

Meanwhile with Cross and Merciful (let's just say Cross changed Merciless name). Cross did a good job on raising Merciful. Like he sent him to school, teach him how to fight and even decided to have Merciful to take over the company. You can say Merciless Merciful finally get to live like a normal kid.

Then for Hope... Oh dear, they lost their mind.. Maybe the day Lux was born, Cross already took her away so Dream and Hope doesn't know how Lux look like right now but they're still trying to find her...

Palette still happen lol cause dramaaaaa-

#evil lux au #[e.l.a] ask #e.l.a what if #what if timeline

[the-fandom-queenxox]

So I made myself wait to watch the witchcraft smp finale till all the povs were out, which means I waited for Cleo to upload and also my college decided to allow offline/traditional classes to be back so it took me a bit longer to finally sit down and watch the povs. So here is some of my thoughts while watching the witchcraft smp finale episodes:

(Spoiler warning)

17/04

Lauren:

-Yeah Lauren you kinda did drop the whole competition just to vibe, but that's okay I still love you!

-Omg her wings look like thicc slices of bread!!And the colors of it are real pretty

-Yeah Joey!!! You were the worst best friend ever, screw you!

-Scott to the rescue!!!!

-YOOOO Joey's out first!!!!!

-CLEO NOO!!

-Hi supreme Lizzie

-Scott's the new supreme!!!

-Oh yeah they all do have her autograph in a way huh?

-Everyone reaction to finding out Cleo was an undead this whole time is really funny

-OH I KNEW THE DEMON WOULD BE BACK TOO!!!!

-Lauren just dipped lmao?!?!??

Eloise:

-The "Yep that's me, you are probably wondering how I got here." Bit to start the episode was good

-Training montage

-Damm Shellby's strong af, she really giving them a hard time

-Ohhh her artifact exploded on her because of the reset, alright that makes a bit more sense

-Oh she skipped the demon fight hmm

-Lol she became a witch content creator after the competitions?!

-Oli and Sausage got bailed out by El

-They made wcsmp's version of love or host lol

-Did she steal a award!?

-Someone get Scott I found his supreme crown

Joey:

-Oh that ice blast spell is cool(pun wasn't intended)

-Bro not the Stacy callback!!

-Cleo's time freeze ability <3

-Okay demon battle time

-Gods why was it that Joey give the "If we work together we can defeat the villian." Speech, it's not at all a thing his character would say

-Bro the demon's not even taking any damage lmao

-Scott's new to his supreme witch powers leave him alone

-Dude what home the mages won't accept you ba- oh that one right...

-I mean yeah screw those ice mages and all that but how is Joey's story gonna end now?

-You don't have any best friends le- oh yeah Tiff would be your best friend after all the demonic and botania stuff the both of you bonded over

-Where's Tiff?! Did mother earth take her back or smth?!

-No Joey she couldn't have gone through the elf portal, she has told you before that the portal works only one wa- aphgkgdj?!SURE JUST GO IN JOEY BYE WITCH!!!

18/04

Prismarina:

-Okay so at this point I'm pretty sure that there many chests in the area but not all of them have stuff in them and are there for decor

-Where did that blaze come from?!

-Lmao Cleo saying "Do we have a cool name?"

-Cleo and Scott are not giving Pris a chance to breath lol

-"I can't see it but I'll pretend I do"

-Bertha's curse got broken!!(see Bertha you didn't even have to bring back your dead sister and the demon she took down with her to break your curse you just had to wait)

-Is Bertha immortal?? Also do they not have a job outside of being the supreme witch competitions referee(???)

-Is Mertha's curse also broken now?

-Lol the demon fight crashed Pris' computer

-ARE BERTHA AND MERTHA ENGAGED NOW?!??!

-Is Pris a siren of some kind?

-Oh her dead sister is there, I'm going to assume that's her spirit coming for a visit or something

Shubble:

-Oooo we are finally meeting this "she" Shubble keeps mentioning

-My girl saw the weird dead deer skulls and said "Ew"

-*Big gasp* *choking noises* *literally dying* *it was nice knowing you*

-*In a nerd voice*Uhmm actually those look like shiny charizard wings thank you very much

-Her immediate respons to seeing Cleo was zap-teleport out of there

-Love how Tiff, Shubble and Pris are just watching Lauren and Joey "attacking" eachother

-Shubble leaving the scene when Scott shows up lol

-I love hduo, found sisters <3

-So is Tiff's first death not counted?

-"He is already dead let it go" SHELLBY?!!?!!!KAGLZHSK

-Why is it always these 2 in a fight to death

-Oh she just flew away?!!

-"Aren't you like dead though?" Shellby you need to stop!!kdhdhchbj

-Oh come on!! We are not meeting "her" aww man :(

Cupquake:

-Witch Tiff's grandma used to make nightsade berry pies. Good fact to know

-Oop the Bertha clone is back

-Oh her sneaking behind Cleo was so cool

-"Our leader!"

-"Yeah I want a piece of that. Equality!"

-The voices are back

-Oh, so she did went through the portal...huh

-This is just a random thought, but are we getting a fairies smp next? Cause I feel as though both witch!Tiff and witch!Joey 's stories are meant to continue in a way? Guess we'll have to wait and see

Cleo:

-Oh this is the longest episode, kinda nervous...

-The voices of all the Cleo's?! Excuse me?!??

-Gods, to get any of the end armor set pieces is so expensive

-Oh here is Pris making her amends, yeah I know this already I watched Pris' pov

-"I'M YOUR MAKER!" It's great to finally understand what she said at that time

-Yeah, I think "the coven" does sound cool and ominous

-Did Cleo just pledge herself to Scott? I-yo-I can't understand what their saying from everyone talking over eachother

-Damm has she not liked any part of being a time witch...

-All the skins!!

-And she's human again!

-"And they lived happily ever after." That's a poetic end to Cleo's story. Since she did introduce us to her character with "once/twice a upon a time" and had kind of a storybook structure from then on

19/04

Scott:

-He sounds so annoyed that he's only allowed to take 20 items with him lol

-I don't like how Scott said that he feels like he was going to "burst" and green particals started coming out of him...

-"Wow, you can't just say she's big!"

-"It encapsulates how weird and wonderful we are but it all still works together." Whatever you say new supreme!

-Frank and Agatha were in a 20 buck bet lol

-Agatha what other stuff is down in your secret lair??

-HES LOSING HIS POWERS TOO?!?!!

-Oh he is really going through with it!! Anything for his love ig

-HE DID IT!!!MILO IS BACK!!!!

-Oh he drowned to save Maxwell(I still don't know who that is. Their dog maybe)

-4 years?!

-Maxwell passed away a year later?!

-"Moonlight" "My little shadow" aww Milo is soo sweet, I love him already

-So he left the crown behind willingly. I mean I guess it make sense he just needed the power of the supreme witch to finally bring Milo back and since he lost all his powers he's not fit to have it anymore...

-Wait does this make Eloise the new supreme or do we need a new competition to be held pronto?!(in my opinion Shellby should be the new supreme cause she came in second place)

Bertha:

-So the supreme cursed Bertha and Mertha because she looked into the future and saw terrible things were to happen if anyone else were to become the supreme witch? Yeah that's fair ig :/

-Oh wow that was a quick forgivness lol

-Mertha did get the worst of it

-Her nap got interrupted that's so rude

-Time for the supreme games to begin!! But were skipping that probably cause I already watched it 8 times before this

-Oh quick run down of the events?! Sure...

-Oi!! That's so mean to Lauren she did her best!!

-That was an accident though!

-Oh when Joey asked to break the crown to have all of the being the supreme witch Bertha said "Me too?" Hehe

-Where is Mertha?!

-All "-ertha named" mobs lol

-I'm getting nervous, where is Mertha?!

-Why was she on top of a ice mountain?!

-Mertha's uncursed!!

-"666 hours later" sihdudynxtwhAT!?!

-WHY IS EVERYONE GOING THROUGH THAT DAMM PORTAL!??!!?

-Also why were you 2 spying on Joey and how did he not see the 2 of them, they're not hiding all that well

-They have a witch police?!

-Oh Mertha looks so sad waiting for Bertha...

-"Bertha will return" well yeah I sure hope she does!

And just like that it's over...how do I feel about it? Well...I think the smp had a strong start and a strong middle the ending though...is fine I guess...just wasn't my cup of tea, but I still liked the smp

#witchcraft smp #witchcraft smp spoilers #wcsmp #wcsmp spoilers #zombiecleo #scott smajor #laurenzside #joey graceffa #shubbleyt #ihascupquake #prismarinaplays #soupforeloise #bertha #wcsmp bertha #my opinions about all the characters endings will probably change over time but this is how I feel right now #long post

[oonajaeadira]

Hello! Absolutely no obligation at all to answer this, you just seem really lovely and approachable. Any words of advice you would be willing to share for someone who sort of just arrived here accidentally because they are chronically behind the times and didn’t realize there was a bandwagon and is now utterly terrified to interact anywhere in the fandom lest they make a problem worse and/or get lumped in with the portion of the bandwagon that is…erm, overboard and a bit scary?

(Which isn’t to say you or anyone else is being intimidating on purpose of course. Everyone seems lovely, the anxiety is just REALLY committed to winning this round.)

(Second add-on before I forget, your writing is absolutely bloody brilliant by the way. Thank you for sharing it with us!)

Hello you lovely, lovely, lovely human. <3

Breathe and stick close, honeybee. This is a good corner of the fandom....at least from where I'm sitting.

To be totally honest, I know that there's a lot of horror in the fandom, but I've actually not seen a lot of it with my own eyes. That's because when I landed here, I basically just kinda sat and observed folks for a hot second, started writing, and let friendlies come to me. If someone or the mutuals they would interact with seemed like a lot of drama, I mainly steered clear. My best friends here mostly approached me and were kind and gentle and funny and respectful to the man we all love. And because of that, I've pretty much just curated a really lovely corner of the fandom for myself.

As someone who deals with anxiety and depression though, I get you. Coming into a place where there are SO MANY of fans and cliques and strong friendships feels intimidating...like starting at a new school/job. There's really no short answer though. Like anything else, settling in and finding your folks and your path takes a little time.

You seem to be doing alright so far though...you marked me as someone safe to approach. So your powers of observation are working! Good start! 😄

But nobody's going to assume you're one of the scary ones right off the bat. Being kind and offering up a bouquet of niceness (like you did in your ask) opens the door up real quick.

So my question for you is...where do you want to live in this fandom? Are you a fic writer? A gif maker? An artist? A reader? A reblogger? If one of the first three, then start creating, kitkat! Learn how to tag your stuff and those who love it will find you! If you're a reader, I guarantee the fastest way to spread goodwill and make artists start to recognize your callsign and appreciate you is by reblogging and commenting on their work. I can't emphasize that enough--creators don't get paid for their work here. They share their creations in exchange for interaction and community. They want to scream joyfully about the fandom with other fans. Please, for the love of Pedro, come scream with us!

And that, my friend is what you bring to the table.

That's all you have to do. Openly share joy. Do it by sharing your art/stories/talents or by sharing the work of others and your love of it. And if you happen to share your joy with someone but don't receive it back from them, then you've found someone who may not be worthy of your collection of the fairest folk. That's okay. There are a hundred more who will acknowledge your joy. Turn around and you'll walk right into them around here.

But if you have anxiety, it's okay to go slow. Starting on anon is good, helps you get some practice in before you're ready for your debut. Just remember what my buddy @insomniamamma says..."the anon button is not for hate. It's for horny and embarrassed about it."

You'll get over the embarrassment soon enough once you realize we're all pretty horny (including sappily horny for fluff and romance) around here. Don't judge yourself for it. We sure won't!

Post some joy. Reblog some work with an "I love this!" Join in an ask game. All of those are loved around here.

And do it on your own terms. Take the time you need.

Nobody's gonna think you're one of the overwhelming ones, love. They'll just think you're one of the thirsty ones. And that's nothing to be ashamed of once you realize that you're no different from everyone else in your new favorite corner of the fandom.

(gif by damerondjarin)

#join us #we have pedros #joy and kindness and respect #and being hopelessly in love and admiration for one glorious chilean dork

[bluespring864]

Hello :)

I've noticed that you've been showing a bit of an interest in Discworld lately.

So naturally, being very much into Discworld right now, I can't just ignore this. :D I don't know how interested you actually are of course, but I'd still like to try and nudge you towards starting it rather sooner than later. Obviously no pressure - I know how it is, sometimes you just don't want to get into something new, let alone a 42-volume book series. :D (Although you don't have to commit to reading all of it right away; most books can stand pretty well on their own.)

It's just that I'm quite certain – no, actually I'm even inclined to say I know – that you would love Discworld. This might come across a bit presumptuous, especially since I don't actually know you. But judging by your interests and generally what I see of you on my dash, I would be very surprised if Discworld wasn't right up your alley.

Because even leaving aside characters and storylines, the writing alone should be a major draw. I regularly marvel at the masterful way in which Terry Pratchett uses language: as a means of characterisation, to convey an idea or even just to describe someone's facial expression - and of course to make us laugh.

And the puns, oh the puns! They're probably what made me fall in love with his writing in the first place. Can't resist a good pun. I could provide examples if you want. :D

I won't get into characters, themes or what have you right now because this ask is long enough as it is. One thing I want to say, though, is that I feel like a lot of the messages conveyed in those books would resonate with you, because you strike me as a very compassionate and caring person.

So, to come to an end: If you need any more information or incentives to get into Discworld or are still on the fence about how or where to start, feel free to ask me anything. And in case you will actually start reading the books, I'd be more than happy to exchange thoughts or just gush about stuff. :D

PS: I hope you had a lovely christmas and wish you all the best for the new year*. :)

*Isn't it somewhat annoying that English doesn't have an adequate translation for "Guten Rutsch"?

This is definitely the nicest thing I've had in my inbox all year, you lovely person <3

I am still to this day confused as to why I never read any Terry when I was a teenager. I assume the local library didn't have a lot of his books or put them so far in the boy's section that I never really noticed them (and why tf were the teenage books gendered, I hope that's not the case anymore... hm, now I'm wondering whether I'm remembering this right, but I really think there were boy's and girl's sections). I picked one of his books at random a few years back and read it on holiday, jetlagged (it was a bit confusing, because of the jetlag and because I think I picked something that belonged somewhere in the Discworld universe without me ever having had a real introduction to it) but I still liked it, and have been meaning to read more Discworld ever since.

Unfortunately, when I read that book I had just started a demanding job that often requires me to speedread through hundreds of pages in a few hours, which has left me with much less capacity to read for pleasure. The books are literally piling up around me. But I will get round to Discworld one day, I'm sure of it, not least because of your glowing recommendation! And as soon as I do, I will most definitely let you know so we can be language and literature nerds about it together ;-)

#having a 'love the people in my phone' moment #(I'm writing this on desktop but you get the sentiment) #bluespring asked and answered #weidenwinde #i am still blushing and i have been smiling the whole day each time I remembered there was this ask to answer once I got home <3

[yevmarie]

Just my mental state and thoughts below

Please go past it if you don't want to read it. The idea is not to ask for any comfort, or whatever may seem I need. I just want to let go of my thoughts in written form. Yeah, in public, but still in my blog. So…

---

There have been almost four hard weeks already since the breakup. I'm emotionally exhausted and tired of repetitive haunting thoughts. I'm constantly pushing myself to get rid of recalling him digging into work (which is not much unfortunately), looking for a new job to cover my basic needs (haha, I won't find anything worthy as I'm just useless and still need to live separately), asking myself what if I move to my home city and these four years would be washed away… But the rational part of me says it doesn't work this way. And I'm sure I'll drown in depression more than now being with my old parents with no friends/acquaintances around as the home city is still dangerous and gets missile attacks.

I miss him badly, but I don't see any reciprocity from him. I found him as my soulmate, but definitely, soulmates don't do such things, right? I'm even more stupid giving him a chance to fix the things, hearing him he'd like to do it, but not seeing corresponding actions so far, instead continuing conversations with the girl he cheated on me with. Maybe it was just the way he soothed my pain lying again.

I think I'm starting to realize which lesson this situation has brought me: not betraying myself first, loving myself again, being independent finally from everyone, accepting myself, and enjoying being on my own not being afraid of loneliness. Finally understand I really could love and care (not sure I'll be able to do it once again towards someone), but no one ever will love me back so unconditionally as parents and me. It's very sad I came to this conclusion only after the breakup, not after my one-year therapy.

I assume I did everything wrong towards myself pushing down my personality, being a comfortable girl, swallowing his anger, and trying to be the 'best' version of myself for him. He admitted that I was the perfect one. So fucking perfect that he didn't appreciate that and decided to cross the lines. Sadly, no one is perfect, and I can't be such as well. But maybe I'm just trying to purify his shitty actions by explaining my false ones. I don't know. All I see is that I've never been such before, it's not me. And I don't know whether it's the real him currently. But I assume I was just blind.

Maybe I'm just too demanding towards myself again willing to get everything I want and need just in a snap and I just need time, to slow down, ground myself, and distance myself from him mentally, letting us move on separate ways. I don't know the right answer yet. I hope I'll find it, if not, then recover and start a new brighter and happier chapter of my life.

Chapters by the way. There is no privacy at my friends', so it's difficult to focus on writing. But hell, I want to continue this. At least the imaginary world brings me more calmness and comfort, than the real one. And there's the third chapter almost ready to be published, and the fourth is under work when I have minutes of privacy. I hope I'll figure out how I can put writing in my routine.

Take care of yourself and see you soon.

#mental health #relationships #personal thoughts

[missbaphomet]

oh yea those individuals sure suck i wonder what they all have in common:) you can never know if a male is gonna be a creep or a danger like them so that's why we're scared of them all and our fear turns into hate. it's literally not that hard to understand?? yes, women can be dangerous too but no woman has ever been that disgusting to me. no woman has ever catcalled me or whistled at me or creeply followed me or any of my girl friends. no woman i know has ever seriously made "women should go to the kitchen" jokes or inappropriate sexual comments about other women and their bodies or made rape jokes (unlike literally all the men i know btw). my male classmates used to secretly take pictures of female classmates and teaches' asses whenever one of us bent over and posted them on this now deleted instagram account. no woman i know has ever objectified other women like that. anyway i know all the bodies there are from women killed by males because i read news that tell the whole story once they're found + the only men found dead there died because they couldn't swim or fell down. and im from italy btw where we hear about femicides happening everyday fr it's deeply heartbreaking idk how you can just pretend like it's not real. men get killed too, of course, mainly by other men and not for the same reason women are killed. and they kill themselves more often only because they use more effective ways to die than women.

What they have in common is that they were rude to a person on the street, hope this helps.

Maybe don't assume everyone is out to hurt you? The overwhelming majority probably won't realize you exist once you leave their peripheral vision. This is some severe victim complex shit, and you're justifying it with fucking Star Wars of all things. You do realize that the end of that quote states that hate leads to suffering, right? It's a fucking warning. Also, great job lowkey accidentally comparing radical feminism to fascism... but let's be real, radical feminism is fascism lite™

Just because it hasn't happened to you doesn't mean it hasn't happened. My girl friends in high school used to make jokes about that kind of shit, and I'm sure plenty of others have as well. And if (big fuckin if) "literally all the men" you know make jokes that make you uncomfortable maybe you should just. Not know them? I have had a lot of guy friends and I can think of only one of them that was genuinely a dick.

I feel like this is a lie tbh. Seems awful convenient that there's not any evidence, and it's super easy to make false claims. If it happened, damn, that sucks bro, sounds like a couple students were shitty but it's not like anyone can verify.

Also now's probably a good time to mention that "femicide" doesn't mean "woman killed by a man for no reason." It means "a woman was killed because she was a woman." If her sex was not the motive, then it wasn't femicide. Even if 100% of those you mentioned did happen to be killed by men, unless explicitly stated that he killed her for being a woman, we really don't have any way to know. The distinction is important here, because that would be the difference between a hate crime and simple murder. Also that's a pretty bold claim that the men were only drownings and falls, especially when you immediately turn around and state that men get killed too. And once again, men are more likely to be killed than women per the UN's report of .57 per 100k for men v .37 per 100k for women, which works out to 570 v 370. I am genuinely surprised how close it is, but these are overall homicide rates and I can only look at the numbers. I don't live there. @femmebisexuelle maybe you have some insight here?

Suicide ≠ homicide. Congrats on the argument that men are better at killing themselves tho?

#baph bleats #asks

[beomeli]

That Invisible || C.BG

Warning: none

Genre: angst, wingwoman, unrequited love, heartbreak

Non-idol!Beomgyu x fem!Reader

~Requested~

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

A quiet sigh escaped your lips. Your delicate finger slightly tapping on the wooden table impatiently. Listening intently to the loud chatting inside the warm and cozy café. The once warm coffee was now cold, the cup half empty.

Suddenly, the bell rang indicating that someone opened the door. You turned your head towards it, seeing a panting Beomgyu. His eyes scanning the entire café before seeing you, a small smile forming on his lips along with concerning eyes. quickly he made his way towards the table, taking a seat across from you.

"I am so, so sorry!" He said as he continued panting, it was obvious he was stressed. Even his red cheeks indicated it.

"Seriously, again?" You said, visibly upset by his action. You had waited for almost an hour, contemplated on leaving multiple times, but you knew you couldn't.

"I woke up late and the bus driver was so slow due to the weather-" he kept going on a long rant about his misfortunate morning.

"Next time just, give me a call.. okay?" You said, trying to calm him down. You knew he was sincerely sorry, Beomgyu has always been a very sensitive and sincere person. But the annoyance was still there, knowing that he could commit the worst crime possible, and you'll still love him.

He let out a loud sigh,

"It won't happen again, I promise" his soft, warm hand was now on top of yours, giving you a reassuring and familiar touch. His long fingers stroking yours.

You looked up at him and gave him a nod, along with a sweet smile.

"Okay.." was all that needed to be said.

——

Exiting the café, the two of you made your way towards your school. First period was around 30 minutes away and the walk at hand was about 20 minutes. Which gave you time to talk even more.

"Oh no, I forgot about Mr. Lim's assignment!" Beomgyu suddenly blurted out, you scoffed at his forgetful manner.

"Why are you acting like this has never happened before? You always forget assignments!" You said teasingly as you lightly pushed his shoulder.

"Ah shut up." he shot back, along with a chuckle. His smile was sweet, showing of those cute faint dimples of his. You couldn't help but stare at him, Giving him a big smile back. He was always making your heart flutter, especially when you were all alone. But it was just a mere crush, nothing that would be noticed, or answered. You knew him from the back of your hand, and you knew he never saw anything more than a friend in you. All his past relationships, crushes and girl talk proved it. And all you could do was pretend, neglecting the fact that you had strong feelings for him, and supporting him even though it tore you open. It made you mad and hurt on the inside. But you couldn't be mad at him, he was all too sweet and loving for you to be mad. You were only mad at yourself for being so stupid and idiotic. Falling for someone you had zero chance with is the definition of stupidity, and still you fell into that pit.

"Sure sure..." was all you could say as you looked into the pavement, crossing your arms.

It was quiet for a bit, comfortable silence. Since it was still considered late morning, cars and people were walking around, either to their jobs, maybe they had lunch time. But still it felt like there was only you two alone. All you could hear was your own soft heartbeat, along with his quiet hums. It was this aura that you always felt around Beomgyu. His warm and soft smiles along with his sweet demeanor. You wished to stay like this forever.

But the feeling got cut short when he started a sentence you most definitely didn't want to hear.

"By the way, you know this girl I've been talking about right?" With those words, the whole world became a loud mess, and the comfortable aura that you had created quickly turned to uneasiness. you knew that this conversation was bound to happen.

He had mentioned her before, saying how beautiful and nice she was. And when you realized who it actually was, your world fell even more. The girl he was talking about was your friend. well, kind of. And to his credit he was right. She wasn't the stereotypical mean girl, but the total opposite. Being very friendly and sincere. And as much as you hated to admit it, she perfectly reflected Beomgyu’s type. You wished you had the priveledge of hating her, wished that she was mean and unworthy. But she wasn't. She was your friend, and she was perfect for him, everything you weren't. Of course this didn't mean you exactly supported her in this situation. but you knew that you had to support Beomgyu. That's what true best friends are for.

“Yeah, what about her..?”

You pretended to sound interested, but you knew what was coming, you’d had this conversation too often.

“Aah.. this is a bit embarrassing..”

He scratched the back of his head a bit, looking down at the pavement, he was evidently embarrassed.

“Come one, what is it?”

“I know I ask you this all the time, so don’t get angry at me!”

Here it comes,

“Could you maybe help me out? You know, to get together with her?”

There you had it, at this point you weren’t even surprised. You were used to that phrase. Expecting it almost every time a conversation erupted.

“I mean I really like her so..” he trailed off, slightly swaying back and forward, anticipating your response.

You sighed, you did this towards yourself. And now you knew that there wasn’t anything to help you out if this situation.

“Sure! I’ll help you two get together..” your tone fell as each words passed, your eyes averting towards the ground, trying to avoid anymore eye contact. Beomgyu on the other hand, didn’t notice the sudden shift in behavior. His happiness occupying his mind too much.

“Thank you so much Y/N! You’re the best!” He jumped in excitement before giving you a tight hug of appreciation. His arms softly curling around your waist and his strength lifting you up lightly above the ground. If this was any other hug, you would gladly embrace yourself in his touch and gladly lean onto him. But this wasn’t like any other hug, not after you just had the worst conversation there is.

You knew that being a people-pleaser would lead to situations like these. And sadly, these situations came all too often. It seemed like Beomgyu loved finding new girls that he seemed to be “so in love with..” and then date them for a couple of months before moving on. Almost asking for help every single time. You were tired of the same pattern repeating itself everytime, and even though you were used to his begging for help, it never got easier to handle it. You've tried moving in multiple times, first boyfriends, then small dating and even hook-ups. Everything trying to fill your desires, but it never worked,

All you had in your mind was Beomgyu.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

"Miss Y/L/N, I want to talk to you please." Mr Lim said as he leaned over his table slightly, signaling for you to come up to him. You watched as all the students left the classroom, before you took your books and walked towards his table.

"Yes Mr Lim.." you said, slightly shaking in your voice. You knew this was bad news, the look in his eyes said it all.

"Recently, things hasn't gone so well for you, you flunked your two past tests." He started, before placing your two latest tests onto the table. Both being marked with a big red F. It was almost cringeworthy seeing the heartbreaking results.

"You've always been our top student, what is the reasoning behind this?" He asked, his tone a bit harsh.

You thought for a moment, trying to find your words. In reality, work had been a real pain. And it didn't help that your mentality was at breaking point thanks to Beomgyu. He has been wandering your mind endlessly due to all the help you’d given him.

"I've just had a lot going on recently." You answered, knowing that the answer at hand was far from what he wanted to hear. He let out a dissatisfied sigh before leaning back against his chair.

"Well this isn't acceptable.." he looked at the papers once more before crossing his arms, it was obvious he was thinking about what to say next. And your heart quickened, fearing the worst.

"You’ll have to do better in the next test! Or else your grade will drop dramatically which I assume you would be very displeased with.”

“Study well for the next test, You may leave." Quickly you nodded before exiting the classroom in a panicked state. You were a bit relieved that he let you off the hook, but still disappointed about the fact that your grades had been dropping dramatically. You cursed yourself once more.

You tried easing of your mind as you made your way towards your locker. Students were chatting, laughing and walking around. Suddenly you felt a soft touch on you back, you turned around and there he was. The reason for your downfall.

"Hey!" As soon as you heard his voice and saw that beautiful smile you couldn't help but smile back.

"What did Mr Lim say?" He asked, leaning against the lockers next to yours. Quickly you opened your locker, taking out your books for the next class.

"To be honest, I don't know how to tell you this.." you were obviously embarrassed about your dropping grades, you've always, as Mr Lim said, been in top of your class. And these news would be the start of endless and endless teasing from not only Beomgyu, but everyone.

"Come on... tell me, tell me!" He begged as he leaned closer to you. Playfully you pushed him back giving off an sarcastic eye roll. He let out a small chuckle before continuing to bother you.

“It’s nothing.” You turned to your locker, digging out the book for your next class. As a thought came to your mind. You glanced back at Beomgyu who was still leaning onto the locker, a small pout on his lips as he was visibly dissatisfied with your answer. You hesitated a bit, but decided to go with the decision.

“Actually.. could you maybe help me study a bit?” He turned his head quickly towards you, a bit surprised by the sudden question for help.

“To the physics tests you mean?”

“Yep..” you shrugged a bit, trying to sound confident.

He hesitated a bit, not really knowing that to say. You figured he was surprised that the supposed A-student suddenly needed his help. Sure, he wasn’t doing bad at school, you just did better.

He lightly and slowly nodded his head.

“Well.. I guess I could, Friday?”

“That would be great!” You gave him a appreciated smile, which he gladly reciprocated.

“Alright, that’s settled then.”

You were happy, you’d actually get to spend more time with Beomgyu, all the while you got your homework and studying done. It was perfect. You’d look forward to Fridays more than usual.

"Alright then, well I got to go, I'll text you later!" Was all he said before he jokingly pushed your shoulder and walked off towards his classroom. A small sigh escaped your lips, and you found yourself watching Beomgyu walking away. Like many times before.

However, your smile faltered when you noticed that you weren’t the only one eyeing him. A couple of lockers away, stood the girl that Beomgyu had fallen for. Watching him walk away intently and having the same loving gaze as you. Not even hiding the smile plastered on her face as she saw his figure disappear. Clenching her books harder around her chest as if she was holding her breath, like the tiniest sound would alert him and make him turn to look at her. You’d found yourself in that situation many times before, The only difference was that, he chose to appreciate her love. Not yours.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

Before you knew it, questions and approval was all you heard from Beomgyu. Him constantly asking what to say and how to charm his lover. It was weird, you’d helped him so many times before, so why couldn’t he remember the former suggestions you’d given him. It was like his mind went on a total reset each time. He wasn’t dumb... for the most part. So why did you always have to be his wingwoman? it was exhausting. It felt like your entire friendship was built up due to his love concerns, even though that wasn’t entirely true. You knew he viewed you as a good friend. But your anxiety and sadness didn’t come to an end. It felt like an endless loop. And even though you wanted to get out, even though you knew this was unhealthy and absolutely tearing you apart. You couldn’t pull yourself to leave Beomgyu. He was your precious best friend, and you loved him so much. How could you just leave him? That would hurt you more. You just couldn’t.

You were at least excited over the studying sessions he’d promised. You appreciated his help. And you were mostly excited over spending more time with him.

You sat in the library, waiting for Beomgyu to arrive anytime soon. For the 10th time that minute, you checked your phone. The time was at '08:54' so you were a bit earlier than the planned time. This was of course nothing you held against since you needed more time to prepare for his arrival.

The clocked kept ticking, eventually hitting 9:15. You figured that maybe he was just running late again, you’ve been so used to that situation. Although something in the back of your head said that it might’ve been a different case this time. But you couldn’t leave, like many times before in the cafe. You never could pull yourself to leave. You always had hope for him to arrive. ‘just 10 more minutes.’ You always thought.

After about 30 minutes more you decided to take a leave. Class was about to start and you couldn’t just sit there to wait for him. He obviously wasn’t coming. You were disappointed to say the least. But what could you really do? Quickly you whipped up your phone one last time, when suddenly a text message from Beomgyu was finally received. You smiled as a small droplet of hope was evident. He was just running late, right? Well as soon as you read his message, disappointment overcame once again.

'Hey Y/N, ik it's pretty late but I'm going to have to cancel. I forgot to tell you that I planned to have breakfast with Suejin today! I'm sorry hope you haven't waited for too long, I promise I'll make it up to you!'

Your expectations were shattered, his promise was broken. And you were sad and angry at him for being so ignorant towards you. Why make a promise if you can’t keep it? You always helped him out when he needed it, but he couldn’t do the same. You felt so pathetic standing there alone and waiting for someone that never even intended to come. It was humiliating.

A part of you knew something like this would happen. You knew he didn’t prioritize you like you did to him. You were just a friend. Sure he cared about you to a certain extent, but never like he did to those girls. He knew that no matter what he did, you’d never leave him. Always fall into the same pattern of being used. You were angry to say the least, both at him, but mostly yourself. Because it was true, you would always go back to him no matter what he did. You knew that there was no end to it. You’d gotten so many signs to just leave him, to search for new friends. Every time you think ‘this is the day’.., the same thing always happen. You see those beautiful eyes and smile and you just fall right back.

This is pathetic.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

Flopping onto your bed with a tired sigh, you turned towards the clock.

"It's almost midnight, dammit.." you said to yourself as you turned your head back towards the ceiling. 

Your boss had decided that today was a good day for you to overwork, and overwork you did. Supposedly, some rich costumers at the fancy bar you were working at was dining and being chatty, which led to you staying there 2 hours longer than usual, having to serve them and handling the bar. This eventually led to you missing the train, having to walk home a 1 hour walk. Finally arriving home at around 11:30 PM, which in hindsight wasn't that bad, but still you wanted to catch up on homework due to Mr. Lim's threatening talk earlier. Figuring that doing your homework no longer were and option, you tiredly moped towards your shower and thus you're now laying on your bed absolutely exhausted.

Fortunately for today though, it was a Saturday. Meaning that tomorrow you didn't have to worry about not getting enough sleep. You smiled at yourself as you laid comfortably in your warm and soft bed.

"I wonder if Beomgyu is already asleep.." you whispered to yourself, your mind wandering off. Imagining Beomgyu sleeping peacefully in his big, fancy bed. Him being all calm and cute. Probably wearing a pajamas and snuggling with a pillow like he always does.

You chuckled a bit to yourself as that image came to your head. After all this time, he still came to your mind, and you couldn’t help but have a sweet imagery of him even though he hurt you repeatedly. you’re still so awestruck by him, what did it have to take to just forget about him for once.

Your mind was brought back to reality when your phone suddenly started ringing, you checked the name on the screen.

“I guess he’s still awake..” you shrugged before answering,

“Hi” his voice sounded a bit tired, a hint of grogginess, like he’s being trying to sleep but couldn’t.

“Hey..”

“Were you sleeping?” He hesitated on his words, like he knew you were angry at him, but you didn’t dismiss him too quickly.

“Nope, I just got home from work.”

“Okay good, so I actually called to apologize.” You lifted an eyebrow at that, which you knew he wasn’t able to see.

“Oh, why?”

He paused for a bit, trying to find the right words.

“Well.. I felt really bad for leading you on with the studying and bailing on you like that. I knew you needed my help and I promised..” he sounded so genuine and precious. Your heart melted.

“So, I’m sorry for what I did.. I understand if you’re mad at me, but I get it. I just wanted to at least apologize.”

“It’s fine, I’m not mad at you or anything.. I was disappointed sure, but it’s whatever.” You couldn’t be mad at him, it was pathetic to say the least. You felt stupid, but you just loved him too much. It was actually ridiculous, that much you knew.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.. it’s okay. Don’t worry.” You softened your tone, trying to sound genuine, which made him sigh in relief.

“Thank you.. You’re so sweet, you know that..” that was surprisingly flattering, Beomgyu has given you compliments before but, you still became surprised at his sudden sweet words. You couldn’t hold yourself from smiling at his words.

It was quiet for a bit, and slight shuffling could be heard from his end, but soon enough he spoke up again.

“So.. I have to tell you something.” He started, sounding very excited over what to say next.

“Sure, what is it?” You answered, smiling over the phone.

“Okay so.. Suejin actually broke up with me.” Your eyes widened at that, they broke up already? That was the shortest relationship Beomgyu has ever had, maybe he had finally realized... that..

“What? Oh- I’m so sorry.” Obviously you really weren’t sorry, instead you were happy that the conversation was through the phone because you knew you couldn’t hide the smile plastered on your face. But he didn’t need to know that.

“Well, it’s okay because the same day I got a message from Soo-ah and she asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with her!” Your smile faltered as soon as he said those words. What did you expect? That he’d confess? You felt embarrassed for even thinking that.

“Oh...” you couldn’t even hide your disappointment anymore, and you were sure that Beomgyu noticed. But he didn’t care.

Instead he continued,

“So, I told her yes! I was actually a bit sad over Suejin but Soo-ah is so much more pretty and funnier!” You could hear him chuckle a bit over the phone, you on the other hand held in your tears.

“Yeah, you’re totally right.” You tried sounding enthusiastic and happy for him, but as each words passed it ended in a flat tone and a quiet sigh.

“Since we’re going to the movies, do you have any tips on what i should wear and how to make a move?” As said, you never felt surprised anymore when he asked for your help. You had just accepted that that’s all you’re good for. You were nothing but his wingwoman.

As you looked down onto your phone, a droplet lightly hit the screen. Giving off a small sound of impact. Before you knew it, one more hit the phone again. And then one more. You felt your cheeks heat up as tears continuously fell down. Forming a streak that wouldn’t end anytime soon. Tiny sobbing escaped your lips as you tried holding yourself back, you didn’t want him to hear.

You were so disappointed at yourself for falling into the same cycle again. But you knew that leaving Beomgyu was not an option, you loved him too much. Whether you liked it or not. In the end, you just had to accept that your feelings for him would never get reciprocated, that his oblivious matter would stay the same. You were just a friend to him, nothing more, nothing less.

You were just that invisible.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

A/N:

Hellooo! Em here, hope you liked this ff haha. God I write sooo much angst and unrequited love this is embarrassing :,)

I actually rewrote this like 3 times, since it’s my first request I figured that I would try to make it reach the person in questions expectations. I hope I did haha.

Also I were suppose to post Yeonjun first but I finished this one quicker.

Sorry for taking so long, senior year is harder than I thought.

I’ll see you later, bye🥰

This work belongs to @Beomeli on tumblr. Please do not trace or copy my work ©

#beomgyu #beomgyu angst #txt beomgyu #unrequited love #txt angst #txt prompts #txt #tomorrow x together #txt hueningkai #txt soobin #txt taehyun #txt yeonjun #bighit #txt fanfic #request #beomgyu x reader #angst #kpop fanfic #tomorrow x together beomgyu #choi beomgyu

[avenging-criminal-bones]

After All This Time || Chapter Five

Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Word Count: 2,146

Chapter Summary: Anger. And harshness, maybe feelings. I haven't decided yet so I guess you'll have to just read to find out.

CHAPTER WARNINGS: angst?, asshat hotch again, sad feels

A/N: Guys, I'm like legitimately so sorry that this chapter took so long. It's not even that I've been all that busy. I definitely did go to California for two weeks, but after that I think I just got lazy? Had writer's block? I don't know. But New chapter is UP.

TAGLIST:

@kingofthetwats @wanniiieeee @uwu-sebastianstan @piggyinthesea @yoshigguk @thatisthemagic @errorcosplay67 @ivebeenthinkingboutu @big-galaxy-chaos @rynfoxsleeps @phoenixsnape1 @mojofun @pachiibatt @enjoymyloves @thenewnormalforensicator @word-scribbless @zezezena @chelseyjoyce @ellyhotchner @lora21 @flipperpenguins @illegal-brains @sunnysaysbookreviews @anti-zippy-snoot @kya-li

You come to eleven hours later, the first thing that you hear being the steady beep of a monitor.

The hospital.

It smells... white, the cleanness of it making you scrunch your nose. Still not having opened your eyes, you sense the brightness, almost making you not want to at all.

However, you knew how hospital visits work. When Reid was injured, the whole team was there waiting for him to wake up. With that push, that you had people waiting for you to wake up, you opened your eyes.

Everything was too bright at first. You felt your lips fall into a grimace and joked aloud, "You guys don't need to be so quiet, she lives."

There was no response, and as your vision cleared up, the wind was knocked out of you like a punch to the gut.

Empty.

The whole room was empty. Aside from you and the TV, there was no talking. There were no people.

For a moment you thought that you were dead. Or maybe dreaming, because who wakes up from a seemingly severe injury with no support system? With no friends.

You hear your heartbeat speed up before you feel it, but boy do you feel it when it hits.

The monitor must send an alert to the nurses' station or something because shortly after, a small, black-haired woman rushes into the room.

"Agent L/N? Are you alright, is there any-,"

"I just- where- did my- wh-where is my team?" The stutter surprised you and you sat up fast, not realizing how prominent the pain in your abdomen was until it was too late. You let out a soft gasp, but looked at the nurse to hear an answer.

"Oh, uh, honey... I asked as they left and the tall, broody one said that there was an emergency." She walked up to you and turned a dial on your IV machine, gently asking you to lay down again.

You complied, not fully paying attention. Your mind was somewhere else; thinking about the harshness of your team, but you had to assume that this was Hotchner's doing.

"You alright, sweetie," the kind nurse asks, her name is Monica.

You nod slowly, your head feeling a lot lighter than it had when you woke up. "Yeah. I'm okay. Um, before you go can you hand me my phone?"

She nods, looking at you for where, and you gesture to the bag that's slightly out of your reach. Monica hands you both the phone and its charger, pointing to an outlet on the wall behind your head.

Nodding in thanks, you plug the charger into the wall and watch the kind nurse leave before unlocking your phone. You see immediately that you have five missed calls from your mother, and after further searching, you notice messages from Emily, JJ, and Penelope. JJ's was the most recent, so you open hers first.

JJ (BAU) 43 minutes ago.

Hey Y/N, In case you wake up before we get back, Hotch called our debrief meeting, so we all went back to the precinct. Sorry, hon.

xoxo JJ and the Girls

You didn't register the tears until they were falling down your cheeks. You sighed a bit and replied to JJ's message with a short, 'got it'.

As soon as you pushed the 'send' button, the door to your room opened again and your entire team rushed in.

Well, most of the team.

Really, everyone except one person.

You were quick to wipe your eyes, trying to hide the fact that you had been crying. JJ walked to the chair beside your bed and sat down, giving you the most gentle hug as she did.

"Did you get my message? Are you feeling okay? Do you need a nurse, any water?"

"JJ, you're momming her," Derek joked as he bent to give you a hug. "For real though, you feelin' alright, lil mama?"

You nodded, sending him a tight-lipped smile as Emily walked over to the other side of your bed, bringing Penelope with her on a video call.

Spencer even came by, but he looked relatively uncomfortable and stayed by the door.

Waving at him a bit, you say, "You can come in you know. I won't bite."

"I know, Y/N. I was just worried. Statistically speaking, you survived on an off-chance. The ratio was close to 83:17, and the bullet entered your abdomen in-"

"I get it Spence. I should be dead," you pause slightly seeing everyone's wide-eyed look at your bluntness, "BUT I didn't die, so everyone can stop looking at my like I'm going to break and just settle." You chuckle a bit and sigh as you see the rest of the team besides Spencer nod their heads or visibly relax their shoulders.

"You're right, kiddo," Rossi says quietly, "You're okay, and we can celebrate that."

"Thanks, Rossi." Smiling, you lean into his hand, which was cradling the side of your face for a moment. "Can someone get Hotchner please? I had some words that I'd like to have him hear."

JJ places her hand on your arm then and says, "Y/N, maybe that's not the best idea right now."

"No," you shake your head and make eye contact with her, "That's exactly what I need right now."

"Y/N..."

"Spencer, can you go get him please? He's just sitting out in the lobby, correct?" You snap a little harsher than you meant to.

The boy stutters a bit, but eventually nods his head and walks out of the room. The rest of the team shares a look before also walking out, giving you space for when your boss comes in.

Sitting up straighter in the bed, you even your mouth into a thin line just as Hotchner walks in the room.

"Am I off the clock right now, sir?" You don't miss the way his eyes flash to your lips but you choose to ignore it.

He sighs and crosses his arms over his chest, "Say what you need to say, agent."

"Who the hell do you think you are? Calling the debrief not only at a time where one of the team members can't make it, but when the team member is in the hospital with a GSW wound." Your voice rises steadily as you continue talking, but you have more to say. "Not only that, but you couldn't even be bothered to make sure I was okay when the debrief was over?" Subconsciously, you recognize the switch from a third-person mindset to a personal one, but you pay it no mind.

"Agent L/N, you-"

"No. You will call me Y/N, and I will be calling you Aaron. We aren't on the clock right now and you don't deserve my professionalism," the heart monitor spikes in tempo, and you throw the blanket off of your lap.

He quirks an eyebrow at you as you command him, but nods his head slightly, letting you be in control for the moment. "Go ahead, Y/N. You get whatever irrational anger you have towards me out in the open and we can deal with the consequences later."

"I left EVERYTHING for this job, Aaron. I left my mom, who never stopped grieving a lost son, I left my job there thinking this would be better, and I lost friends and people who actually cared about my well-being. People who wouldn't leave one of their own in an unknown hospital to wake up by themself, not sure if they were even actually alive since there wasn't anyone with them." You saw Aaron flinch with everything that you listed, but you didn't care. He needed to hear it. "So yeah, Aaron. I get to be angry, and you don't get to tell me it's irrational, because this is the most rational I think I've been this entire year."

"Y/N. You put not only yourself, but me, and the rest of the team in danger yesterday. Excuse me if I don't want to see you and be around you while you're in the hospital." Really, if burned Aaron to his core that he couldn't reach over and tuck the stray piece of hair behind your ear, because right now that's what he wanted to do. Except it's inappropriate and he's not sure you'd let him within three feet of you.

"NO! You see, that's not how it works. Are you telling me that if you saw a little boy with a gun trained on them, you wouldn't have done the exact same thing?" Hot tears fill your eyes, but you don't wipe them. You almost hope that him seeing you cry will make him feel bad, if even just a little.

Glancing at the way his jaw was set and how he clenched his fists in his lap, you knew he was struggling to keep his cool, so of course you pushed harder.

"What if it was Jack, Aaron."

"Dammit, L/N, it wasn't Jack. It was just some boy that we couldn't save. We shouldn't have been able to save him. You didn't use the training you had, and you didn't use the rational part of your brain. As terrible as that sounds, and trust me, I never want to lose a victim, if you had used the training from the bureau, we wouldn't have saved him. " Aaron stands up and paces the length of the bed then, feeling your eyes following him the whole time.

You shake your head as you let your gaze fall to your lap. "I wasn't going to let him die again... I wouldn't have been able to live with myself."

Aaron's eyebrows furrow a bit and he looks at you with angry curiosity in his eyes, "Again? What do you mean by that?" That's when Hotch remembered earlier when you mentioned her mother who lost a son. "Y/N, did your brother... No. Actually, I'm sorry, just forget I said anything,"

There was a dark anger in your eyes as you shook your head. "No, Aaron. Ask me. Ask me this one question, and then reassess your profiling of me."

His gaze turned steely as he squared his shoulders again, showing no emotion in his voice as he spoke. He almost felt like the best way to approach you right now was as if you were the unsub.

"Was your brother murdered, Y/N?"

Dropping your head, you feel the tears burning in your eyes again and you nod. "He was only five. He had his whole life ahead of him. You'd think a child would be safe with a group of nuns or a priest, but no. Not even them. He was branded with a cross before he was killed and it's just unfair."

Aaron starts to walk closer to your bed, seeing the devolving pattern of your breathing, "Y/n, I'm so sorry, I-"

"No. Aaron, just, please go. I'll catch a flight home when I'm allowed to fly again, so you guys just go home and I'll figure it out. I mean, that's what I did when I was waking up by myself, right? Go ahead and fire me if you need to, suspend me, I don't care anymore, but I'll come back when the hospital says it's safe." You take a deep breath and watch as he turns away.

He gets all the way to the door before he turns back around and says, "What was his name."

"Joey."

Hotch nods and walks out of the door, remembering that the final victim, the one that you saved, was named Joseph.

After the encounter with Hotch you fell asleep. The heavy medication and the anger in your head knocked you out easily. You were asleep for a few hours, but you woke up when your pain medication wore off.

You noticed that your work phone had a few notifications, so you sat up a bit and looked through them.

There were two that stood out to you. The first one was a notification that read "Hotchner (Asshat) has added you to the group 'BAU Team'". The second was his message in that group chat.

Hotchner (Asshat) 2 hours ago

Hey team, change in plans. We will be staying here until Y/N gets cleared to fly. It should only be a couple of days and I know we were planning on flying out tonight. Sorry, Thanks.

As soon as you liked his message, your texts were blowing up from Emily. She was saying stuff about how "he totally likes you", and about, "you had a rough time on this case".

Also, apparently Derek saved all of his sarcasm for when Hotch got back, and the thought made you smile.

#criminal minds #aaron hotchner #hotch #hotch x reader #aaron hotchner x reader #criminal minds x reader #angst #sadness #talk of child death

[waywardtakami]

- don't leave me

✦pairing: hawks x gn!reader

✦c/w: language, slight mha manga spoilers, 16+ only , angst

✦a/n: hello!! I'm very excited about this fic, it's my first gn one! It's been sitting in my wips for so long and I'm finally happy with it. hopefully people will still read this without there being smut. thank you! <3

✦summary: hawks gets hurt during a mission...

✦w/c: 2k

Keigo had left you again to fight in another mission. He had only been gone for a few days, but you wished he was with you instead. You missed him so much. He hadn't been physically by your side in so long, causing your heart to ache again. Times like these were practically torture. Waking up without him by your side was agonizing, but you were used to it.

His job was all-consuming and you knew him being away for large amounts of time would affect you when you committed yourself to this relationship. There was a constant worry for his life and maybe a little for your own. 

You and Kei decided to keep your relationship as private as possible so no one would go after you. He didn't want anyone to kidnap or hurt you. 

Even though his musk scent was flooded throughout your shared home, you still tried distracting yourself the best you could.

After making your favorite food, you plopped onto the couch and turned on the TV to try and take your mind off him. 

As the TV flickered on, your boyfriend's face flashed across the screen. A gruff voice played over what was being shown. You assumed it was just something about his stats or a recent interview per usual. It didn't help the feeling in your heart subside by seeing him.

You changed the channel, again and again. But every channel had been taken over by the same broadcast. You eventually fixated and listened.

Your heart dropped.

Hawks had been accused of murder. 

"Murder...?" you mumbled to yourself. "No..he...what?" Your heart was beating so fast it felt like it was about to thump out of your chest. You were stuck in a pool of emotions of confusion and immense shock, it was like your head was on fire. 

Dabi...one of the League of Villain members was behind this. All the information you received was from Keigo's colleagues and the media. 

Keigo had been hurt bad...real bad.

The fact that you couldn't do anything about it had you overwhelmed and panicked. When you finally found out which hospital he was brought to through FatGum, you drove yourself there.

Of course he was brought to one one of the furthest ones from where you guys lived. On top of that, traffic was horrendous. With everything that had gone down, the citizens of the city were frantic and trying to get home to their families.

Your hands and entire body practically trembled while driving. Your eyes pricked with tears at the thought of Keigo's wounded state. "He's fine he's fine he's FINE!" You kept telling yourself over and over. 

When you made it to the hospital, there was a large number of people in the waiting room. The sounds of people clamoring in and trying to get a room were deafening. You hurried over to the front desk. 

"Hello Ma'am I need to see Hawks, he should be here." She wouldn't let you in his room. You wanted to see him, no you needed to see him. You started crying, pleading, begging for her to let you go in his room. But the front desk lady apologized and insisted he needed to rest and isn't accepting visitors. 

You knew it was really because she probably thought you were just some fan of his. Or maybe even a reporter trying to sneak in photos. But no, you were his baby, his life, and they weren't going to let you in.

"I'M HIS DAMN PARTNER FOR GOD SAKES!" You yell while slamming your fist against the counter. You didn't realize how much impact you put into your fist until you felt pain in your hand. The waiting room goes almost quiet and heads turn to look at you. You glance back to see all the faces turned to you. 

Your voice softens from embarrassment. "Please...just let me see him." Your fist still against the counter looking at the nurse with tears streaming down your face. 

She stands up and moves closer, "I'm so sorry, I believe you…" She slides a clip board with a few papers attached. "...but we can't let you in just yet he's still recovering from his injuries, he needs to rest right now. Please fill these out while you wait." She looks back up with you with a faint smile. She really does believe you. She can see it in your eyes, the pain, she understood.

You release your hand, and pick up the clipboard. Looking at her on the other side of the counter you give her a face flustered nod and mouth a quick "thank you."

You go sit down comfortably in one of the empty chairs to wait for keigo to wake up...

The news of your wounded boyfriend was already half across Japan. After filling out the forms you scroll through your phone to calm yourself down. You kept seeing post after post about him. Almost all news headlines had his name. 

You think to yourself about how much of it is all bullshit and that he's fine. Deep down you weren't sure if the words your brain kept telling you were true. You click on one of the posts about him that reads: 

"THE NUMBER TWO PRO HERO DEAD" 

Your heart skips a beat, but quickly you realize it's just a fake. You scroll through, lightly skimming the bullcrap you were reading. You scroll and see a photo taken of him the night he was brought to the hospital. You wonder how the press even got a photo of him. You focus on the photo, he does look dead. It only showed his upper body, completely covered in burns. More tears forming at the corners of your eyes just seeing him in the photo. Oh and his wings, his big bright vermilion wings...gone.

You were a complete mess at this point but your sniffles and choked sobs were interrupted by the front desk lady waving to you. "He's awake." 

Quickly following her into the room you see him. As you stand in the doorway for a moment, your heart sinks. You hurry to him. He had bandages wrapped around his head. His hair was short and mostly singed off. And his wings...they really were gone. "I'll leave you two alone," the nurse walks out and closes the door behind her.

You turn back to him.

"Kei?" you whimpered out.

His half lidded eyes look at you. His formerly bright, charming and yellow pupils have become dark and filled with anguish. He was wearing a mask over his nose and mouth with two tubes coming from the sides of it. He couldn't speak or breath himself, due to his throat being burned. 

Of course he knew it was you. Tears welled up deep inside and coursed down his cheeks. Seeing him like this had your body nauseas. You move to cup your hand on his face, feeling the material of his mask rather than his soft subtle skin. You graze your thumb against his cheekbone to wipe away his tears.

You pick up one of his hands to hold it in yours. "Kei….I'm so glad you're okay." You were sniffling through each word. He slowly raises his arm to point to the phone sitting on the table near his hospital bed. Handing it to him, you watch as his calloused fingers type out what he wants to say. 

"Angel, I've missed you so much, please never leave my side." You faintly smile at him, wishing you could hear those words come from his mouth and not the AI voice. 

"I won't leave you Keigo, I'm here, I won't go anywhere."

He types again. "I'm pretty beat up, but I think I'll make it."

Your ears focus on "think" for a moment. "Yes Kei you'll be fine, everything's gonna be okay. You felt a bit better being in his presence but you still couldn't bear the sight of him. Your eyes began to prick with tears once again and this time Kei was the one who bought his hand up to brush your tears away just like you did moments ago. 

You try your best to wrap your arms around him without causing him anymore pain. You could feel him wince when you laid your head against his chest. "Sorry Kei I didn't mean to hur-" He waves his hand and shakes his head, signaling that it's okay.

Your body looked calm despite how tangled your mind was.There were many questions that flooded your mind. So many things you wanted to say. But you could worry about the details later. Right now you were finally with him again, there was no way you were letting him leave you ever again.

You were bent over, upper body on top of him at an awkward position. You didn't want to hurt him, so this had to work.

Despite the position, you took in the moment with your boyfriend. Feeling his chest slowly rise up and down. You close your eyes and imagine you were back home with him in bed. Just snuggling on a weekend afternoon, light shining in on him making his wings light up beautifully against the sun. His golden locks and glowing skin, his scent washing over your senses. Your warm bodies practically glued together. You wanted that again, you wanted everything back to normal.

He moved one of his scarred hands to your back, slowly rubbing up and down. He knew he wasn't going to make it. He was fighting so hard on the inside. So damn hard...for you. He didn't want to leave you, he couldn't. His mind wandered about the life he had planned to have with you.

He faintly smiled under the mask when he imagined you walking down the aisle...holding your first child...sitting in little rocking chairs growing old together. That's all he wanted.

Both of your tears never stopped. You were both silent. The only sounds to be heard were each other's quiet sniffles and the monitor Keigo was attached to, making a faint beep to his heart beat. Still laying on his chest, his breathing started to slow and so did the beeping, being lost in the moment you didn't notice really but he knew.

He waved his hand signaling for you to stand up and brought his hand to take off his mask. He couldn't hold on much longer. Every aching pain inside him felt like knives stabbing his insides and with each stab more time from his life was taken.

"Kei, you need to keep it on to breath, please." He shakes his head and takes it off anyways. The beeping still started to slow. The mask hung off the side of his face. His honeyed voice now husk from the burns. 

"Baby...I love you so...so.." He coughs making him hiss at the pain.

"No..fuck..Kei stop, you're going to be okay just put the damn mask on." 

"I'm too..far..gone, I have no more fight left." 

Holding his jaw in your hands,your face inches from him. "No you have to stay strong for me, please don't leave me again, I can't do this without you." 

"Kid...please...when I'm gone...find someone else and-

"NO- I ONLY WANT YOU!" You cry out, holding his head to your chest. Long-lasting sobs leaving your mouth.

"I love...you" His breathing is heavy from trying to speak. He needed to tell you this. He needed you to understand how much he loves you.

Moving his head from your chest. "I love you too...kiego." You manage to say through your choked sobs. 

You move to have your lips brush his, softly, delicately, like butterfly wings, just long enough that he could inhale your breath, feel the warmth of your skin. He closes his eyes and connects his lips to yours. It was deep and passionate, like you were kissing him for the first time. You held one side of his face with one hand, and held his hand with the other. 

But when you pull away, his eyes don't open. It's like that's all he wanted, no needed. One last kiss, one last touch. To feel you. 

His breathing completely slows, and you're left with the prolonged beep of the monitor. He was gone. The man who was always too fast for his own good, had left you and the world too fast.

✶tag list: @levithestripper @sleepysnk @conniesspringersgf @regretfulfairies @miyanom @sashatotie @romeoandjuliet96 @strawberry-pp @megvmi-s @cinnamonnn-roll @gooddayzarerare @kkodzvken

#i hope everyone likes this 🥺 thank you for the support !!! #im so excited hhhh #mha #anime #bnha #hawks #keigo takami #my hero academia #keigo takami x you #takami keigo #hawks bnha #bnha keigo #bnha hawks #bnha takami keigo #keigo takami x reader #tw: injury #tw: death #hawks manga #hawks x reader #hawks x y/n #hawks x you #takami keigo x reader #keigo x reader #mha keigo x reader #keigo #keigo x y/n #tw: dark content #tw: dark themes #tw angst #tw: angst

[sirthisisa-wendys]

The Enforcers: Part 7.5 (Geto Suguru x Fem!Reader)

wc: 1.2k

tw: none (you'll get some smut next chapter)

masterlist

"Please, just bring our daughter back home."

The TV switches off, and you face your reflection, staring into the sunken cheeks you've come to accept as your own. Your mother and father's faces are burned into your mind's eye, their tear-streaked and ruddy appearance making a perfect picture of an attempt to gain sympathy.

But there's no sympathy for them in your heart. Not with what you know now.

"I would've expected you to try to escape," Suguru mutters, standing from the other side of the metal table and placing his palms on the freezing cold surface. "But you've been incredibly docile. What are you planning?"

"Nothing," you lie, adjusting your position in the metal chair as the handcuff clanks against the arm. "Nothing at all."

"Here's the deal," Suguru starts, holding up the thumb drive. "There are a ton of files on this little stick here. I want you to go through every single one and decrypt the ones that haven't been released. Once you do that, I'll set you free to do as you please."

"No," you answer, lacing your fingers together. "I no longer work for you."

"You don't work for the CSB either."

"Seems I'm an independent contractor now." You hold up the wrist attached to the cuff, metal scraping against metal. "And I have terms that need to be met before I work on anything of yours."

"Tell me," he replies, tilting his head to the side.

"First of all, I want full freedom while I'm here. No oversight, no guards, no nothing."

"I think you might be a little off the mark with your requests," Geto sighs, pursing his lips together. "You're asking me to fully trust you'll do what needs to be done."

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend," you retort, and Suguru lifts a brow. "So, for now, you're my friend. In addition to no oversight, I want to be able to have input on when and where these files can be released."

"So you want my job?" You shake your head and Suguru crosses his arms.

"I want to call the shots alongside you. You brought me into this, I got fucked up because you got sloppy, you're going to do as I ask so I'll help you with your mission. I doubt a single ex-Kitsune down here can do what I do in less than thirty days. That's why you brought me out of my room."

"That's not the only reason why," Geto breathes.

"Stop acting like you have feelings for me, Geto," you scoff, rolling your eyes. "You brought me out of that room - and down here - to help you because no one else is fast enough to do what I do. Otherwise, I would've been put under lock and key for the rest of my life." Suguru doesn't answer you, so you assume it's true. "Finally, I want a nice room to stay in."

"It would be next door to mine."

"That's fine," you shrug. "I won't bother you unless you're fucking... with my sleep."

"Done."

_____________________________________________________________

Your bed is soft and warm when you make it up to your room, and you're given two things - a key and the thumb drive.

An obviously refurbished computer sits in the corner of the room on a small desk, and you sit at it, powering it up. The machine isn't incredibly old, but it is old enough to potentially slow down your decryption of the files.

But that's okay. The main problem right now is just getting used to your new space.

As the computer boots up, you walk around the apartment-style surroundings, checking out the bathroom and modern-looking appliances that look foreign next to the yellow and orange anachronism of a carpet in the bedroom. A small kitchen and living room sit just past the bedroom and down a short hallway, but other than that, nothing.

A check in the closet reveals all sorts of clothes - some ultra-feminine, others gender neutral - and you look at the types of shoes offered to you. It's only then that you realize everything in the closet will not only fit you but are brand new with the tags still on them.

You're still investigating when there's a knock on the door, and you stop mid-search to answer it. Suguru stands in the hallway, sighing when he sees you open it.

"Is the place to your liking?"

"Yeah," you bite out, avoiding his gaze. "What's up?"

"Can I come in?" You consider saying "no" because technically he's still your enemy. But you let him in anyway, stepping back and allowing him to walk past you and into the bedroom.

"What can I help you with?" you wonder, eyeing the computer still revving up in the corner.

"I wanted to apologize. For everything. Using you, lying to you, and holding you hostage - to an extent." You press your lips together and rock back on your heels while holding your breath. "You might not ever forgive me for the things I've done, and that's okay. I just wanted to let you know that every feeling I have for you - friends and otherwise - is real. I couldn't fake my love and care for you if I tried."

"How do I know you're not lying to me right now?" you ask, and Suguru shakes his head.

"You can't. I could swear on everything I hold dear, and still, you would have to make the choice to trust me or not. Which I completely understand if you don't. I'm not here to try to get you to trust me again; I would just hate for you to think that every single time I interacted with you it was for... this." He motions around him, then stands akimbo in the room as you wait for him to finish. "When Toji shot you, I thought I was going to lose you. It frightened me so bad... I--" His voice cracks, and you look away from his crestfallen face as he remembers that day. "I wasn't sure what to do. But just know I won't let a single soul on this planet harm you again to the best of my ability." Your heart stutters, and you look back up at him, feeling rage burn in your stomach.

"And if the person who hurt me was you?" Suguru flinches. "what would you do then?"

"What I'm doing now. I'm going to have to show you that I'm serious, though. That much I know." He steps toward you, but you step back, eyeing him carefully.

"You should go. I'll start decrypting the files when the machine begins to work."

"Sure," Suguru whispers, then starts toward the door. "Don't forget, I'm next door. So if you need me, let me know." As soon as he leaves, the computer goes to the start screen, the image of a tree blossoming on the computer. You stick the thumb drive in and sit down, inhaling before you begin to work on manually decrypting over a thousand files, all for a man you still felt something for, despite your outward appearance.

All for a man who almost got you killed.

All for a man who offered you the truth on a silver platter, and told you to "eat".

_____________________________________________________________

TAGLIST: @missbonekitty @wack0-genius @thankuary @jsqeeut @r-i-m-f-009 @sunfloweroranges @leanne-tamashi @girlruby23 @rein-icu @brownskinnedgirll @chanelmalandro @savantsoulfinder @jibe-gajima @chilledlucifer @amnxsia @kontentious @fuyuko26 @everybodylovescayrayray @flare-on

#geto suguru x reader #jujutsu kaisen geto #getou suguru #getou x reader #jjk geto #geto suguru #jjk #jujutsu kaisen

[softhxtch]

TITTLE: Just Be Here

SUMMARY: Reader just finished a case and her husband, Aaron Hotchner is always there to support her. 

PAIRING: female! reader x Aaron Hotchner

CHARACTERS: reader, Aaron Hotchner, Emily Prentiss and David Rossi (literally for a second), Allison (OC)

WARNINGS: child assault and abuse; mentions of misscariage, alcohol usage, body fluids (blood, urine, vomit), pornography.

WORD COUNT: 3,5K

A/N: am i back? i don’t know hahah, but it’s something, right? again in this story Jack doesn’t really exist, sorry. and again CAC - Crimes Against Children.

'Hey, sweetie. You're safe, okay? Nobody's gonna hurt you anymore.', you whispered taking little girl into your arms. She was sobbing quietly with tears falling down her pink cheeks. She was no more than three years old, still in her purple pajamas, that were dirty form all the body fluids person can imagine and also dirty room she was held in. 'You're safe, Allison. You're safe.', you kept repeating and little girl just held her hands around you even tighter.

You looked around the room and the whole sight was just horrible. No windows, barely any lights, cages, blood and urine all over the floor. Just an awful place to be in let alone to live for months. Even the smallest thought of what was going on before the whole team came in gave you shivers and blood started to boil inside you. The place was there for years at that point and no one knew about it. You were just looking at your teammates, taking the rest of the kids out of the building. Some were crying, some were screaming and some were just clinging to the agents hoping that they would never comeback. And they never will. You would make sure of that.

' Allison, we have to go.', you said quietly, trying not to scare her. But little girl just shook her head and tightened her arms around your neck. 'We have to go. You need to see a doctor. It's scary, I know, but I'm gonna be with you all the time, okay?'

It wasn't easy to convince Allison to come out of the building, but after some negotiations and conversations with you she agreed. You're holding her in your arms as close as possible, trying to avoid the blue and red lights that were blinding both of you in the dark night.

Hospitals were always the last place that you're wanted to be. If you were the it only meant that either someone from your team or family was injured or one of the victims from your case were in tragic condition.

To put it straight, hospitals were never a good sign.

But you couldn't go home, not just yet. You promised Allison, that you would be with her this whole time, so you were also there when she got a check up from the pediatrician. You were holding her hand, caressing the back of it from time to time just to reassure her that you're there. Sometimes your would just add how great she was doing and how strong it is.

'Home.', Allison whined as doctor was checking on one of her bruised legs. Few tears fell down her cheeks, which made your hear break. It was horrible to seeing anyone in that position, but especially a child.

'You're doing great, Allison. Just few more minutes, okay?', you said quietly, taking hair out of her forehead.

'I just need to check the other leg and then you can have a long nap, till morning. How does that sound?', doctor asked and written down something on her notepad.

'I think it's great! Do you, Sonnie?', you said with a happy voice, looking at a little girl. She just nodded, still pouting from her cry few seconds ago. 'I'll be right back.', you said when you heard familiar phone ring. Doctor nodded understanding, but Allison held your hand not wanting to let you go. ' Allison, I'll be back in few minutes. I just need to answer that call, okay? You will be able to see me through the glass. I'm not going anywhere and until then you'll stay with Doctor Ashley.', you explained.

She wasn't convinced at all. It took you few more minutes for to actually let go of your hand. You explained everything a least three times. Doctor eyed you few times, but you just tried to ignore her. After years of working with children you knew how long it sometimes takes to convince them. Especially the ones that have been seriously hurt. They just wanted someone to be with them through the whole process and you understood it one hundred percent.

You sent Allison a small smile, saying one more time, that you'll be back in few minutes. After that you left the room and took out phone, dialing number that called you before.

'Hi.', you heard deep, yet soft voice on the other side. You sighed and replied with the same thing. 'Long night?'

'Yeah and I can't even see the end of it.', you answered and heard your husband's laugh. 'It wasn't a joke.', you added, rolling your eyes.

'I know. But it's kind of ironic considering that the sun will be up in less than an hour.', Aaron said. You could hear him moving around the house. Walking from bathroom to bedroom, probably getting ready for work. 'How are the kids?'

'Fine, if you could say it after living in a basement for most of your life and posing for creepy middle aged men.', you answered, feeling the shivers on your arms. The images that you saw literally just came back. And you can expect they will be coming back more often, but this time in your nightmares.

'All alive?', Aaron asked. You could hear him doing something in the kitchen, which made you smile, still looking at Allison. You actually would do everything to be right now with him in that kitchen. Waiting for his famous muffins with bacon and eggs, like he would do whenever both of you had day off.

'Yes, all eight of them.', you nodded. 'You're heading to work now? It's a bit early, even for you.'

'Not yet.', he answered quickly. You could hear another chews from the other side, which actually made your stomach going louder. 'But yesterday I picked up from the post office that coffee table, that you ordered and I thought I would put it together.'

'You're gonna put a coffee table together? At-', you asked surprised, looking at the watch on your phone. '-4:38 in the morning? Are you okay?', you added with a laugh.

'What can I say? I'm just bored without you.', he answered. Right after that you heard a loud noise from the other side and a quiet curse from Aaron.

'You're okay?', you asked, furrowing you brows.

'Yes. I'm looking for the box with all the tools.', he replied. 'I think I'll ask Morgan about them. He'll know what I should use.'

'How about you leave it to me, huh? I'll do it, because we don't want another trip to ER. It'll be third time this year, they'll assume that I'm assaulting you.', you laughed, hearing just quick 'hey!' from your husband.

For the first time in hours you actually felt nice. You didn't had constant fear in your head about the case. You weren't even thinking about it, right now what you were thinking about was Aaron and that stupid coffee table. And he knew about it, that was the reason why he called. After you were in a car with Allison and two policemen, you texted him that the case was over and you're headed to the hospital with victims. Both of you always do it, just to reassure each other that the other person is fine. Aaron on top of that would always call you. He's a very light sleeper, even waking up when you stir in bed sometimes, so every vibrations of his phone wakes him up. No matter what the time is on the clock, he always calls you. He knows how much you love your job and how saving kids was your thing. You loved it, after few years in narcotics unit you know you found your place. But Aaron also knew that you get very into the cases and you involve yourself a lot and if the case goes wrong you blame yourself really hard. Especially being a unit chief, just like him. So he always tried to light the mood even just a little and talk about the day, whatever comes to his mind.

'You're staying in the hospital, right?', it almost wasn't a question. It wasn't anything new to be honest. A lot of the times you would comeback to the hospital with the victims and especially with this case. He knew it wouldn't be different. You were working on it for over a month and it was draining you.

'Don't think I have a choice.', you admitted, looking back at Allison who was also starring at you. The doctor stopped examination and was about to leave. 'One of the girls won't let me go.'

'Just be careful, okay? And take care. Don't forget to eat something.', he reminded, knowing the previous situations.

'I will.', you reassured him. 'I love you.'

'I love you too, sweetheart. Give me a call later in a day.', Aaron said and you agreed.

After you said your goodbyes, you put the phone in the pocket and went back to the room. Allison immediately opened her arms and you laughed coming closer.

'You're back!', she said loudly, which made you laugh even more. Doctor Ashley smiled at both of you and left the room.

'I said I will.', you reminded her, patting her head. You could clearly see the tiredness in her eyes and how hard she was trying not to fall asleep. 'I think it's good time for a sleep.', you proposed, but Jade just shook her head immediately, taking back. ' Allison, you need to sleep.'

'Not sleepy.', she answered quietly, putting knees closer to her chest. 'Don't want to sleep.'

'You've been awake for a long time, Sonnie. You need to rest. I do too. Everyone needs to sleep so they will have energy for the next day.', you explained, but she once again shook her head. 'I'll be there the whole time. Nothing's gonna happen to you. You're safe.'

'Seven minutes?', she asked, trying to stop the yaw. You nodded and observed how she put her head on the pillow, drifting away from the real world.

Aaron Hotchner looked at his watch for the tenth time in the last 8 minutes. He signed and went back to signing papers in front him.

It was a slow day. Most paper work days were slow, but this one was even slower. He just couldn't focus. His thoughts were everywhere but in that office. He was thinking about his wife and what she's about to at that moment, probably still at hospital with the little girl. It was literally breaking his heart when he was thinking about your job and side effects, but also about your personal issues.

Being married for almost six years and together over eight, was something he was very proud of. He loved you with his whole heart and couldn't see anyone but you. The whole team always loved to see when a woman would flirt with Aaron, because it was always so funny to see him nicely declining the actions. Aaron Hotchner was a strong man with a very intimidating vibe, his voice could literally break you into a meltdown and get when a woman would approach him his eyes would always look for you. He just couldn't see his world existing without you.

With that being said he also knows you very well. Whenever something was wrong, he could feel it. Just from the look in your eyes or movement. You almost didn't have to talk to have a conversation. He understood you without any words and so did you.

After long nights when there were only you two together, Aaron knew what you wanted. Be knew all your dreams and wishes. Where you would like to go for vacations or favourite cuisine. Things that he could control. He also knew about your dream job and family wishes. Things he couldn't control and everytime Aaron would think about this, his heart would break into thousand pieces. Because if he could he would give you everything that you wanted and to do that he would sacrifice anything he could.

Quiet sound of a clock, that was announcing noon, got Aaron out of his thoughts. He looked at the clock just to assure himself of the hour and pressed his lips into thin line. Then he just closed the files on the rest, took coat and walked out of the room. Aaron walked to his friend's office and knocked on the door. He opened them after quick 'come in'.

'Dave, I'm gonna be back in an hour.', Aaron said, looking at the older man working on his papers. He looked up with pen still between his fingers.

'Everything's okay?', Dave asked and got quick nod from Aaron. 'Y/N's at the hospital again?'

'Yeah, they finished the case few hours ago so I'm sure she hasn't ate anything since.', he explained. 'I'm just gonna bring her food and come back.'

'No problem. If anything happens, we'll call you.', David said, waving younger man off. Aaron just laughed and closed the door. Then he walked down the stairs, wanting to leave the office.

'Hey, Hotch! Are you going again to get some food?', Emily's voice stopped him from going further. He turned around to face not only her, but three other agents. 'You're going outside, right?'

'Yes, Emily.', he sighed. 'But I'm not going to the place you love to eat from.'

'I figured. But maybe you would want to do us a favor and go there? Since you're already going outside the office.', she explained and Derek started to come closer with JJ right behind him. 'Look, it's raining outside and it's pointless to have two wet agents in the office. We will pay for the gas and also your food, huh?'

'Just text me your order and I'll see what I can do.', Aaron said, rolling his eyes slightly. Then he turned around and started walking towards the elevators, still hearing voices of agents behind him, who were deciding on the order.

Pediatric floor of the hospital was as always busy. Kids running around, parents trying to keep up with them, crying children from everywhere you can imagine and on top of that walls with so many colours, that he thought that someone vomited on them. He had no problem of finding the room where you were. Of course with a help from nurses.

Aaron slowly opened the door from the hospital room. He was expecting for either you or the child to be asleep and he didn't want to wake anybody up. But the sight inside made just his heart to melt.

You were sitting on the couch with Allison sleeping in your arms. Her head was on your chest and arms were really tight around the back. Her moth were slightly open, just like yours. But you also had your head hung back and he was sure he'd hear your complaints about the neck pains for the next week.

Aaron slowly put the package with your favourite food and something tasty for children on the small table near the door. Then he took the blanket from the bed and put it over you and the little girl, knowing how cold you must be from laying down in one place for so long. After that he just put a light kiss on your forehead and with one last look he left the room.

Aaron got to the elevator and took out his phone, checking out one message from Emily.

If you are going to the place near the hospital and there's a girl with short red hair, then say that you would like to order for Agent Prentiss 😘

He furrowed his brows at the message and dialed her right away.

'Did I say something wrong?', she answered after one signal.

'How this girl supposed to know your order?', he asked, looking at the numbers of elevator going down.

'She'll know, trust me. I've been there many time.', Emily laughed and Aaron could practically see her smile through the phone.

'Whatever.', he sighed, hearing the ding from the elevator. 'Oh and Prentiss?', Aaron called and heard quick 'yeah' from the other side. 'Stop sending me emojis. It's highly unprofessional to do it to your boss and it's making me uncomfortable.', he ended, walking out of the hospital.

You could physically feel lighter closing the door to you home. Everything related to work you always tried to leave outside this house and treat this place like an escape. And it was a long few weeks, so you were nothing but happy and relieved that it's over.

The house was quiet and dark. You could only see dim light from the living room and just thinking about it made you smile. You took off your jacked and boots, leaving the bag at the usual place and started walking towards the light. As you saw Aaron sitting on the couch with his eyes closed, you smiled even wider. His feet were on the coffee table and he had a glass of whiskey in his hand.

You leaned on the door frame and with arms crossed on the chest, you observed him.

'I'm awake.', Aaron said with raspy voice. You knew that he was probably sitting here for a while already.

'I know.', you answered and started walking towards the cabinet with alcohols. 'Aaron Hotchner is at home before me. What's happening in this world? Did they closed the FBI building?', you joked while pouring wine into a glass and sitting next to him.

'Very funny.', he answered with a sarcasm. He put arms around your shoulders and kissed your temple.

'I actually am.', you said, taking a sip. 'But I'm glad you're here.'

'Anytime.', he hummed, placing one more kiss on your head.

'Except the time you're working.', you joked and he just rolled his eyes. 'Thank you for the dinner, by the way. Although I would get something to eat myself, you know?'

'Yeah, you would probably eat your first meal of the day right now. I know you, Y/N.', he said, caressing your arm. 'So, how's the girl?'

'Allison?', you asked, reminding yourself of her beautiful smile in your head. Aaron only nodded, taking a sip from his glass, telling you to continue. 'She's gonna be okay, I hope. But she went through a lot.'

'You got close to her.'

'Yeah.', you admitted. 'I know what you think, Aaron. I know that it's not a good thing, I Get close to those kids and then I come home and they're not there. I know how this looks like. But I swear I just want to help them.'

'I know. But also you need to realize, that when they'll go to foster care they won't have someone to look after them every minute they're there. That there's gonna be many more kids their age and the attention you're giving them right now won't be given to them anymore.', he finished, looking down at you.

'Maybe they don't have to go to foster care.', you whispered, hugging your husband closer.

'You want to adopt a child?', Aaron asked slowly getting to the conclusion and realizing something else. 'You wanna adopt Allison.'

'I do.', you admitted. 'But I won't do it.', you added, sitting straight. Aaron just gave you questioning look. 'They found her mother in Portland, she'll come and get her tomorrow. Ignoring the fact that she doesn't have any job, is living in a two bedroom apartment with four other roommates and all the money goes to the alcohol. Yeah, so Allison has a bright future ahead of her.'

'You never know.', he answered. You put head on his chest once again and laid there for few minutes in silence, trying to relax.

'So, you actually put that table together.', you said keeping the eyes in small brown table in front of you, with Aaron's feet on top.

'I thought you'll never notice.', he answered almost sounding hurt.

'Oh, I did. Just wanted to hold the suspension for a little while.', you smiled and kissed him on the lips. 'Derek did it, am I right?', you whispered, narrowing your eyes.

'No.', he answered simply.

'Liar.', you whispered again, kissing him one more time, but stopping after you hear his phone going off. 'Everything's okay?', you asked.

'Yeah, just Emily.' he answered, but started explaining seing your confused face. 'I gave Emily's number to one of the girls that she has crush on from the restaurant. And I guess she had a good evening.', he ended and showed you the text.

SSA aaron 'Hotch' Hotchner, you are truly THE  man 🥰🤭💗🍑

#Criminal Minds #criminal minds fan fiction #criminal minds scenario #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #aaron hotchner fan fiction #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner scenario #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #david rossi #derek morgan #derek morgan imagine #derek morgan x reader

[simpingforthisonedeer]

"Our Sunset"

Julius Novachrono x GN!Reader

1257 words

Notes: I was thinking of this fic in another fandom where one of the characters makes drinks in her bar that are not your average everyday drinks. They are drinks that taste like concepts, like feelings or memories and I just thought of using Julius’s bartending skills to make magic in a glass and make one for the reader and it got real angsty but enjoy😎💕

Julius passed his new experimental drinks around with a grin as his squad let out a raucous cheer. You leaned on the wall, further away from the rest, keeping an eye out for trouble. As the vice captain of the best yet the rowdiest squad amongst the magic knights, you needed to make sure nobody went too far during these squad parties.

Sometimes you needed to keep even the captain in line...Ah, who were you kidding? You needed to keep the captain in line all the time.

You took a deep breath and sighed.

It was a very exhausting job but it was very rewarding. To protect the kingdom, to keep the peace, to bring a smile on people's faces, relieved that they will be alright...there is no job better than this.

Your gaze landed on Julius with an affectionate smile.

And no one did it better than Captain Julius Novachrono, Wizard King to-be.

You were looking down, lost in your own thoughts about the future when Julius teleported next to your side. You tensed slightly at the sudden movement before relaxing. He handed you a drink as he wore a mischievous grin.

"Did I get you?"

"No," you deadpanned. He had always tried to jump you or catch you off guard since you two were younger but you stubbornly learned how to sense his speed and presence just so you could win this little game between you two. It was the sole reason why you could even challenge Julius.

"Aw, I'll get you next time," he said, like always. You two laughed good-naturedly as you clinked your glasses together and you took a moment to observe the drink as he took a sip from his own.

You stared, entranced by the cool colors bleeding into the warm ones as silver flecks blinked in and out of existence.

"I call it, 'Our Sunset.'" Your eyes met his as a proud smile crept up his face at your impressed look.

Julius often made drinks that were conventionally made from alchohol and they would taste amazing. But sometimes, just sometimes, he would make these mysterious drinks that tasted vividly like ideas, emotions, and memories. They were undescribable drinks that could only be described by the concepts they exemplify.

"'Our...Sunset?'" You asked out loud, wondering what it would make you relive.

Julius nodded and pointed at the window next to you as he looped his arm through your's and lead you closer.

"It's something we all see and experience which is where the 'Our' comes from and because it looks like a sunset." He explained as he raised his glass high out the window as he squinted at it through one eye. You assumed it was to align the colors of the drink with the sky. "And...I hope it tastes like a sunset too..."

He watched carefully as you brought the rim of the glass up to your lips, secretly waiting for your approval.

You took a big gulp, intent on feeling all that the drink had to offer, and boy did you feel it.

You felt a breeze that wasn't there as warmth blanketed you like a lingering hug before it vanished, leaving you a little cold. It felt like the end of something good in your life. Like the loss of something you weren't ready to let go.

The first thing that came to your mind was Julius. Tears welled up unwillingly and you let them run their course with a defeated smile. He only had his eyes on the top. He will leave you with the burden of captainship and...leave you. Your mind couldn't go past that. He will leave you and that was the end of it. The end of your warmth.

"Hey, why are you crying?" Julius cradled your face in his hands as his thumb brushed your tears away.

You hated it. You hated it when he loved you, when he cared for you, because one day, you will wake up and you won't be there to feel his presence, his love, his warmth.

"Was it that bad?" He joked. Everyone in the room had already left a while ago when they noticed that their captain and vice captain were sharing a moment. Your squad hoped that with enough private moments, you two would stop hurting yourselves and confess already.

You and Julius have been close friends since you were children and your relationship blurred all lines of convention. Some percieved you two as friends, some as lovers,  and sometimes, despite your private discomfort, as siblings.

Nobody knew where it began or ended and if you and Julius were being honest, neither did you two.

"No, it was good," you answered at last. "It was perfect."

"So, what did it taste like?" He let his hands fall.

"It tasted like the end..." You focused your eyes on the setting sun. "And I hate it."

"Well, doesn't it taste like more?" Julius implored as he took your hands in his, making you look up at him in confusion.

"More?"

"Don't you feel the warmth in the aftertaste?"

The warmth...yes, you were warm but that was because Julius was here, not because of—Oh.

This was induced by the drink, not the natural warmth that Julius brings you.

"What end did you think of when you drank it?"

You stared at him for a moment, contemplative, before you realized it was useless hiding from your oldest friend.

"You."

"Me?"

"You, gone." Tears blurred your vision. "That was the end."

"What do you mean? I will always be there." He pulled you into a tight hug with an exasperated sigh. "It's pretty tough to kill me, you know?"

You silently shook in his grasp.

"I mean, when you go away to become Wizard King."

Julius pulled back to look at you. He knew you weren't afraid to stand in his shadow. In fact, you argued with those that compared you two, "What shadow? I am standing in his light and that is enough."

"Don't leave me," you choked out.

Julius was distraught. He had to leave you. He squeezed his eyes shut and sighed. Maybe there’s a way.

"Do you want to be Captain?"

"I don't care for the position. I just want to help you realize your hopes and dreams for this godforsaken kingdom."

"Our hopes and dreams."

“Yes,” You conceded with a weary smile and wiped your tears with a sniffle. “Ours.”

He smiled nervously as he scratched the side of his head in a cute gesture.

“Then,” he looked away. “Would you like to come work with me as an advisor?”

You stared, wide-eyed. You’ve wanted the position but Julius had never offered it to you and now? You didn’t want his pity.

“Isn’t Marx going to be one?”

He pulled you close by your waist with an intimacy only life-long friends share.

“Yes, but he will need some help. I had never asked you because I thought perhaps you should be recognized for your efforts once you become captain but if you don’t particularly care for it...” He lowered his head with uncharacteristic shyness. “I want you to stay by my side...And never leave...”

You couldn’t even properly comprehend the relief that flooded you. It was nearly euphoric. Yes, an end was coming, but so was a new dawn, a new day, a new chapter in your life with Julius by your side.

You pressed your forehead against his with a content smile.

“I would like that.”

Notes: AAAAAAAAAAAAA I was going to write soooooooooooooooo much more but I had to stop myself. But I ofc couldn’t stop myself from soft julius at the end alksdjlsa. I swear I’m doing fine but a nice idea about magic kinda devolved into angst i apologize 😅🙏

#julius novachrono #black clover #julius novachrono x reader #julius x reader

[dreamwritesimagines]

First of all, thanks a lot for the CITF story dream, you are doing a far greater job at making us feel emotions through your writing than words can ever describe, and secondly I think I am gonna rant real good here , so please bear with me.

To all those people who are actually suggesting that Peaches should get together with Alex for either a hook-up , random rebound , or to complicate things or to completely move on from Bucky, I- don't - know- shit - but- I- am-still - going - to - do- everything on my own, Barnes, guys it can happen, but it won't last long, coz, Ms, I- Have- a- million- fucking- problems- but- kill- me- if- I- ask- Summer- for- help, Peaches , aren't just your run of the mill toxic couple, they are a WEIRDLY PASSIONATE COUPLE.

People who although seem super damn toxic for each other but will find their ways back anyhow because they are also the only ones who can make it hurt less, join the heart back together, not because that's super adorable and cute, I mean it kind of is, but that's not the point, they are the only ones capable of doing it, coz their problem ain't the toxicity, it is COMMUNICATION, or the lack of it.

Let's begin with Peaches, his mother threatened her, gaslighted her to no end, she got scared and didn't tell him, why coz in all those problems and her own mom being a cold hearted bitch, she forgot that although Bucky was a mamma's boy, he would actually take their friendship into account to atleast try and see both sides, she didn't and still now hasn't asked her preposterous father to back the fuck off, heck at the time, he emotionally manipulated her into taking over the bakery, and taking care of adorable Emma over here, she could have asked for help or suggested for him to be atleast more involved in her life , like dude come on , you didn't use protection, your wife abandoned the family, you atleast owe it to your first born to help her as much as you could, then cut to years later, they reignite conversation at Bucky's dad's funeral , a lot of chaos , and they are in a relationship and Bucky, nincompoop, Barnes does a royal screw up , and shit went downhill from there.

Let's get back to Bucky,Mr fuck up, Barnes, dude first of all, you aren't in this mob shit alone, you aren't in the fucking relationship alone, if it was a mob related reason or anything that made you say that nasty fucking bull crap to Peaches, you could have asked for opinions on your idea to get atleast a beating to pulp form both Sam and Steve, bloody idiot, and then Peaches was so hurt coz he threw the nasty bullshit which she is afraid of a lot on her face , that she forgot one most important thing again, that when people are as passionate about you as Mr Idiot Barnes, when they out of the blue throw mast bullcrap at your face, they are either high as fuck, or their is a very stupid but strong yet weirdly idiotic reason for this fuck up, and you owe it to yourself to irritate them the fuck of, till they just give in and say that reason, for you to either kill them and dispose the body or make them grovel a lot, not sulk and suffer for a month without even asking the og Summer for help, like duh.

Also Bucky the stupid fucker Barnes, seriously thought that they will have a weird, you shot someone and woah that's my new kink, sex and things would be fine, bro like you sure you were her best friend during high school, coz boy , am I having second thoughts , and seriously bender and lap dances what are you three,no forget I asked coz even toddlers are better than you two, they atleast tell upfront whats bothering them, not stop communicating and let it simmer, I am sorry to say, but it feels like history is repeating itself .Peaches is doing the same mistake ,duffer Barnes did all those years ago, assuming the other one is done and suffer and make your sweet , awesome friends suffer with you too, guys don't waste another seven years, coz by then Emma would be a teenager, and teenagers aren't that sweet, not when their elder sister and might be future brother in law, are weird and idiotic and stupid.She might scare the living shit out of you, talk before it's too fucking late,and I still don't get it why Steve and Sam aren't barging the bakery and giving her a nice pep talk that , girl bea the shit out of him to know the damn fucking reasons this all is happening, and Alex , calm down with the subtle insinuations , you aren't really helping as much as you think you are.

ALSO , ITS HIGH FUCKING TIME , STEVE AND SUMMER TAKE MATTERS INTO THEIR OWN EXPERT, PERFECT HANDS AND GET TOGETHER AND ORGANISE AN INTERVENTION FOR THESE TWO Dunce heads , also they should get together like ASAP , if possible.

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOOOOD DARLING?! 😱😍❤

THIS

IS

AMAZIIIIIING! ❤❤

I'm so excited❤

"Bucky, I- don't - know- shit - but- I- am-still - going - to - do- everything on my own, Barnes, and Ms, I- Have- a- million- fucking- problems- but- kill- me- if- I- ask- Summer- for- help, Peaches" This is hilarious 😂😂 And a great summary of their characters😂

Oh you're absolutely right! I think they do have a toxic relationship AND weirdly passionate as well😂 When I was planning it, I planned it to be a slightly dark fic and I think a toxic relationship is a huge part of it ❤

Peaches and Bucky grew up together in completely different homes but I think somewhere along the way, their friendship turned into what one could call addiction ❤ They were so terrified of losing each other and it only got stronger when Bucky started having problems with the expectations of his family and Peaches's mom left, at that point, they were each other's safety and peace ❤

That's also one of the main reasons that even if they're broken up and supposedly "over each other" , they don't act like that at all😂 Peaches is still loyal to Bucky, she doesn't even consider the possibility of giving police any kind of information, and Bucky doesn't even blink when she comes to him for help even at the risk of his own life ❤ So in a way, they will never be over each other 💔

"it feels like history is repeating itself" Ohhhh because it iiiiiis😈 And even worse, like, the last time they got separated they didn't know what a relationship with each other would be like, but now they know, that's why it's so painful for both of them❤

I can't thank you enough for this darling, you're amazing! Thank you thank you THANK YOUUUU! 😍😍❤❤❤

[levis-hazelnut]

Summary: when you and your best friend, Hanji, were younger, you had made up stories about your dream guys - what they would look like and how you would meet. What happens when the one you had made up appears to be real?

Warning(s): suggestions of sex i guess? please do tell me if there are anymore.

Taglist: @castellandiangelo @fandom-addict19​ @20coldhearts​

Status: finished!

part 11 > part 12 (final)

series masterlist

FIVE YEARS LATER...

"So...?" I spoke, looking at Hanji who had a massive grin smeared over her face. It wasn't creepy like her usual grin, it was pure ecstasy and excitement.

She had just come to my apartment (yes, it was now mine and Levi's since she moved in with Erwin) and she burst into my room, which obviously wasn't locked, with the screech of my name. Levi was only in his boxers as he towered over my naked form, so Hanji had immediately scurried out of our room and I grumbled curses as I pulled on a bathrobe. Levi stayed in our room and I went to the living room where Hanji was acting fidgety and was grinning.

And here we are now - me waiting for her to tell me what happened.

"... ERWIN AND I ARE GETTING MARRIED!"

"What?! Really?! Oh my gosh, I'm so happy for you!!" I squealed and brought her into a hug, squeezing her tightly. "Ahh, I’m actually so excited!!!"

"I never thought I could feel this happy. I actually burst into tears when he proposed. Oh my god, I'm so excited!"

"Tch. What's going on?" Levi grumbled, entering the room, wearing just trousers, which meant the bites and hickeys I gave him on his upper body were exposed. "I didn't expect to hear pigs squealing in the living room."

"Erwin proposed to Hanji!" I told him, ignoring his insult.

"Congrats. Can you leave now?" he said blankly with his arms crossed over his chest. Obviously, he wouldn't be happy if someone just barged into his home and interrupted something.

"Levi!" I scolded with a frown as Hanji continued to smile.

"No, no, it's fine. I'm sorry. Just wanted to tell you the big news. Also, you're going to be my maid of honour, of course."

"Yeah, okay. I'm so happy for you, Hanji!" I beamed at her and walked her to the door. "By the way, can I have your keys? I don't want you to barge in here whenever."

"Yes. Sorry."

"It's fine. I should just hurry up before Levi gets all grumpy."

"Okay. I'll see you soon, (Y/N)."

"I'll try to find a day where we can spend time together. But my job is taking up my time."

"Whenever you're free, don't worry. Anyway, bye."

"Bye, Hanji."

As soon as I locked the door, I was scooped up by Levi who carried me bridal style to our bedroom. I laughed softly as he gently dropped me onto the bed.

"You're getting it twice now," he growled quietly in a husky tone.

~/~

"What about this one?" Hanji asked.

"Aww!!! This one is the best! I love it, it suits you so much and I'm sure Erwin's going to love it!" I replied, clapping my hands a couple of times.

Hanji and I were out looking for a wedding dress. We visited many shops, she tried on several dresses but none of them seemed to be the perfect one. However, the one she was wearing now was something that made her look like the perfect bride and it caused tears to gather at the brim of my eyes. Though, I stopped them from falling and Hanji gave me a sympathetic smile, embracing me.

"What's wrong?" she inquired with a light laugh.

"... I'm just so happy for you. I can't believe my best friend's getting married."

She embraced me until I calmed down, even though no tears had fallen.

Once we decided that the dress she was currently wearing was the one, she got measured and pointed out things she wanted to be altered. The worker told us that she should expect the dress to be done and will be able to pick it up in a few months, which will be around one month before the wedding.

We left the shop and decided to get something to eat since we've been walking around all day with empty stomachs.

"After this, we'll go shopping for your dress," Hanji told me after taking a bite of her burger. Yeah, she should be trying to eat healthy to make sure that she can fit into her wedding dress on the day, but she deserved it after doing so much.

"Okay," I beamed.

~/~

I laid on the sofa, on my stomach; one hand was barely touching the floor and the other was holding my phone to my ear as I waited for Levi to finish cooking dinner.

"Wait, what?" I spoke, frowning and shifting to lay on my back.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N)."

"No, but, wait. I haven't seen you in over three months. And that was the only day I was able to make time for just us two. We barely see each other now and I miss you, Eren. Also, Hanji's wedding is next month so I'm going to be even busier because she'll need my help, and I'll still have work, so I'm obviously not going to have time."

"I know. And I miss you, too, princess. But--"

"Don't try making things better by calling me 'princess'. I understand that you have work as well, and you need to go with your boss on this business trip. But why can't you just squeeze in one day for us? That's all I want."

"... I'll try," he sighed. "I'm leaving this weekend and I'll be gone for a week. Maybe I can try to take a day off as soon as I come back. Is that okay?"

"Fine..."

"Stop sulking. Be happy that I'm trying."

A small smile snuck onto my lips, replacing my pout. "How did you even know I was sulking?"

"Are you really going to ask that even though we've been friends for nearly fifteen years?"

"Damn, time goes too fast," I mumbled, as if in thought. Levi came into sight, placing two plates of food on the coffee table in front of the sofa. He tapped my legs, wordlessly asking me to move them, so I did, deciding to sit up. "Anyway, I need to go. I better see you soon."

"You will," he replied, and I could hear the smile in his voice. "Bye, princess."

"Bye," I grinned before hanging up.

"And you say you're not cheating on me with that guy," Levi murmured.

"I'm not, idiot. And he's dating Petra. So just hush and eat your food."

"I doubt you smile like that when you're talking to me on the phone."

"Baby, you know I love you and would never cheat on you with anyone, or do anything to hurt you," I told him, pecking his cheek before picking up my plate of food. "... You're so cute when you're jealous."

"I'm not jealous. Just curious."

"Mhm." I playfully rolled my eyes. "By the way, have you taken a day off of work for Hanji's wedding?"

"Yeah, and the day after because I know I wouldn't be bothered to go into work."

"Yeah, I took off three days."

"Well, I know what we can do for the extra day we're both free," Levi smirked, facing me to kiss me but I dodged it, causing his expression to morph into a frown. "What are you doing?"

"I want to eat," I responded, causing him to roll his eyes (food can be such a cockblock).

When he put his plate down on the table, I did the same so I could tackle him. Once I dominated him, I smothered his face with kisses (being the lovey-dovey person I am) and he scrunched his face up, not enjoying it as much as I was. I giggled when I stopped and got off of him, deciding to finish off my food.

"You're an idiot," he muttered as he sat up.

"Thank you, my wonderful and kind boyfriend," I replied sarcastically.  

~/~

I fixed Hanji's veil and straightened out her dress, making sure everything was fine. I then walked around her so I could see her face and my face broke into a wide grin, tears welling up for the like third time today. I was just so thrilled to see Hanji so ecstatic. And memories of when we were younger flashed through my mind, reminding when we were just immature and stupid kids that didn't know what love was. But now, she was getting married to the man she's loved for the past six years.

"(Y/N), please don't cry. You're honestly going to make me cry and we can't ruin our makeup."

I laughed softly. "Sorry. I'm fine. It's just emotional seeing your best friend getting married." I took a deep breath and didn't let the fluid spill. "I'm fine. Anyway, you look amazing. I love you and I'm happy for you."

"You look beautiful as well. I'm sure Levi will propose to you one day."

"Just the thought of that will make me faint. Okay, okay. I'm wasting your time so I'm going to go. I'll see you out there, okay?"

"Okay!" she grinned and I quickly hugged her before leaving.

I walked outside, where everyone was waiting, including Erwin who stood at the altar which was a floral arch; the flowers were a mix of white and light pink. The ceremony was being held outside on a grassy field which was part of the venue the reception was being held at. White chairs were set up on either side of a white aisle that led all the way to Erwin.

I shot the groom a reassuring smile as I made way to Levi who was at the front. I sat down next to him, which was the same row where Jean and Petra sat. Eren would sit here as well but Hanji had asked him to walk her down the aisle.

I gripped the raven's hand that rested on his lap and he gave it a small squeeze as I leaned my head on his shoulder, making sure not to ruin my hair.

People were conversing, music was playing, and everyone was waiting for the bride.

After a couple of minutes, Hanji had made her entrance, and I could see her excited expression through the veil. God, these tears won't spare me.

Hanji and Erwin had said their vows, exchanged rings and kisses as everyone celebrated for them.  

Soon after, everyone was moving inside the venue but Levi had asked me to stay outside with him for a few minutes. I didn't question it, I just assumed that he didn't want to go inside yet and wanted to spend more time where there were no people. And I wanted the same because there was obviously no fresh air inside that hall.

I wandered up and down the aisle, glancing inside at all the people through the massive windows every now and then.

"... (Y/N)?" the grey-eyed male spoke softly as my back was towards him. I hummed and turned around to look at him, only to find him kneeling down in front of me, a miniature box in his grip.

No. It can't be. Is he actually going to propose? Damn, my eyes haven't watered so much in one day before.

He inhaled and closed his eyes before quietly exhaling and revealing his beautiful eyes again, locking them with mine. "I know I barely say it, but I love you, (Y/N). I love that you're a weirdo, pervert and idiot. I love your positive energy. I love how much of a sappy idiot you are. I love your face when you're sleeping, and now that I just said that aloud, I realise it sounds creepy as hell," he said, causing me to laugh under my breath as I let him continue.

"I just love you so much, (Y/N). No one can compete with you and I wouldn't be able to think of a world without you. I don't know what you did to me, but here I am, sounding like a sappy idiot. I don't know how, but you stole my heart when we first met, even though I had never experienced something like this before. Just every time I look at you, I know that deciding to spend the rest of my life with you is the right choice. So, (Y/N) (L/N)... will you marry me?"

"... Damn, I love you so much," I whispered before raising my voice a little and saying, "Of course, I'll marry you."

A smile, which seemed both relieved and happy, settled onto his face as he slipped the ring onto my finger before standing up. I cupped his face with both of my hands and briefly kissed him before embracing him, squeezing him tightly.

I pulled away from the hug, resting my arms on his shoulders as my fingers locked behind his neck, and his arms were still wound around my waist. I gave him a tender smile and he pecked my lips, a pretty smile widening on his lips. He was so handsome and I to this day, I can’t believe that I’m lucky enough to be with him.  

We both decided to finally go inside, and as soon as we entered the hall, applauds sounded, causing us to come to a halt and glance at each other in confusion.

"CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! AHHHH!!!!" Hanji screamed and ran towards us.

"Hanji, you're a bride, you can't be crazy like this. And you could've tripped because of your dress and heels," I mildly scolded her.  

"Do you think I care about any of that?! You're engaged! I love both of you!"

"How do you even know?" Levi inquired.

"Do you not see those big-ass windows over there?" I motioned to them, where we could see the open space outside.  

"Ohh, Shorty!! You look so happy and cute, and I feel happier for you two than when I got engaged!"

"Hanji, you know I always love to fangirl with you, but today's your wedding day, so it's about you. So, go enjoy yourself. Also, everyone's looking at us and I feel uncomfortable," I told her quietly.

"Oh, okay. Sorry. But I can't wait!"

"Yeah, I know, we’ll fangirl later. Now, go to your husband."

"Okay. Bye, (Y/N)! Bye, Shorty!"

I shook my head and sighed with a smile on my lips as we began to walk again, heading to the table that our friends sat at. I rolled my eyes when they all gave us goofy grins.

"I never knew you could be such a romantic person, Levi," Sasha teased.

"I'm not."

"Well, your proposal speech seemed longer than average," Conny pointed out.

"... Because--"

"He's such a soft baby, who loves to cuddle and loves to be loved. He's like an adorable puppy and--" I told them, knowing Levi was shooting me a glare when he cut me off.

"Oi, shut it, brat."

"He's not even denying it," Jean snickered as he tried to imagine a vulnerable and loving Levi.

"Tch. I was wrong, this was the worst decision I could make," the raven muttered.

"Haha, I know you don't mean that," I beamed at him, booping his nose with my index finger.

"I can't imagine him being like that," Eren smirked.

"Yeah, because it's not true."

"Whatever you say, Levi," Farlan taunted.

"I hate you, (Y/N)."

"It didn't seem like that a few minutes ago," Isabel grinned.

"Love you, too, my adorable, little baby."

"I'm older than you, idiot."

"It's just by a couple of months. And how can I not call you a baby when you pout like that?"

"I'm not pouting. Just shut up."

Once everyone got back to their own conversations, I smirked and leaned in closer to him to whisper, "Just wanted to let you know that you look so damn hot in that tux."

"... And you look beautiful," he mumbled back, only loud enough for me to hear.

The day went on, everyone ate, people danced, and everything was joyful.

It was such a fun day with so much happiness being spread everywhere. However, towards the end of the day, all I wanted to do was relax and lie down in bed with my beloved.

And that's what happened.

Levi and I were lying down in bed later that night. And since he had claimed that he wasn't a soft baby that loves to cuddle, it would've been surprising for our friends to see Levi clinging onto me like a child and burying his face in my chest as I ran my fingers through his silky hair.

"My love?"

"Hm?"

"... If I tell you something, you have to swear that you won't freak out or break up with me."

He removed his face from my chest and looked at me. "How bad is this confession? Is it bad enough for me to break up with you just after proposing to you?"

"Well, I just think you're going to freak out and not want to be around me anymore."

"I'm scared to know, but sure, tell me."

"... About eleven years ago, when Hanji and I were thirteen, we used to make up some scenarios that included specific people. We liked to fantasize about our 'dream guy'-- You know what, I'm not going to tell you."

"You can't just start a story and not finish it. I want to know about your dream guy."

I sighed heavily. "... He looked and acted just like you, Levi," I blurted out, afraid of his reaction. He didn't say anything, just stared at me as if waiting for me to give him more of an explanation. "... Hanji made up a scenario of us meeting in uni, extremely similar to what happened in real life, and, um, yeah... I guess that's all I wanted to tell you. Please don't freak out."

"How the hell do you expect me not to freak out?" he retorted in a slightly raised voice, shooting into a sitting position. "You're telling me you made me up? And in your perspective, I'm basically like supernatural?"

"No... not really. You’re obviously just a normal human being, so it could literally all be a coincidence because you were obviously born normally and not summoned by some kind of sorcery or witchcraft."

"... That's crazy..."

"I know. I was planning on not telling you, but I just had to."

"... You and Hanji are seriously the weirdest and craziest people I've met," he huffed as he laid back down.

"I know, Levi. And you knew that from the start."

"Yet, I still fell for you - an idiot who can't grow up."

"I love you, Levi," I hummed, resting my head on his chest. "You're so much better than what I expected my dream guy to be."

a/n: it’s finally finishedddddd. thank you to all of you that stayed with me until the end of this series and i hope you enjoyed reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it! 🥰🥺 

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