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lilyofthesword-writes · 3 years

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The Intern (Loki Oneshot)

Summary: Loki takes an interest in the latest of a long line of Stark’s interns.

Pairing: Loki x Reader (Can be read as platonic, if preferred)

Word Count: 2,809

Disclaimers/Warnings: None. Just a bit of fluff.

A/N: This wound up turning into something entirely different from the original concept. Just kinda went with what felt right. Also trying desperately to remember working with an Arduino board to make this at least semi-accurate.

Masterlist

Loki traipsed aimlessly through the Tower, his overly-friendly insomnia having kept him up past four in the morning again. Nothing seemed to help him sleep and he constantly grew bored laying around in his room waiting for exhaustion to overtake him. Wandering about seemed as good as anything. Sometimes he would come across something interesting. It seems now would be that time.

He rounded the corner and found himself gazing through the wall-length windows of Tony Stark’s lab. The armor-less Iron Man was passed out in a chair, head haphazardly lolling on a table. Usually, he was still working and would be until at least seven a.m. before Pepper would literally drag him to bed.

Movement at the other end of the room caught his eye. There you were, pulling a blanket out of the cupboard. You crossed the lab and placed the well-used cloth over Stark’s shoulders before returning to your work. Sliding your safety glasses on, you put all your focus into soldering some wires to a board.

What in the nine realms were you doing here at this hour? The sun hadn’t even reached the horizon yet. None of his previous interns ever started their days before nine. Albeit, they had barely lasted a week while you broke a record at just over a month, but the point still stood. Why were you here?

“Are you just going to stand there like a creeper, Loki, or are you going to come in and hang out?” you called out, not even bothering to tear your eyes away from the wiring.

Well, this excursion could prove to be interesting. Loki slithered through the doorway to stand opposite of you at your table.

“So what are you doing up this early?” you murmured. If it weren’t for you glancing up at him, someone may have thought it was more of a question for yourself.

Loki huffed a laugh. “I could ask you the same question.”

That elicited a quirky smile from you. “Woke up way before my alarm and couldn’t fall back asleep. Figured I’d start my day early.” You gestured toward Stark with the soldering iron. “This one over here is pretty lenient on the hours.”

“I would hope so,” Loki chuckled, “considering his own schedule.”

“A schedule that consists of planned energy drink breaks. Definitely one of the more interesting employers out there.”

“I suppose you could say that,” he mumbled, leaning heavily on his forearms propped on the table.

You set down the soldering iron in its stand and shut if off. “So I answered your question. How about you?”

“I simply could not sleep,” he nonchalantly replied.

“Hmm...” you hummed. “Lemme guess. A member of Insomniacs Anonymous?”

His chuckle reverberated through the room. This was probably one of the reasons Stark kept you around. You certainly had a particular snarky confident air about you.

Yet the corners of your mouth suddenly hung low and your brow scrunched together. “It’s more than that, isn’t it?”

“Pardon?” He was confused at your change in demeanor.

“It’s not as simple as you couldn’t sleep. There’s more to it.”

Loki’s lips parted in astonishment. Here you were in your first true encounter with him and you read him like an open book. What had you been told?

“I won’t make you say anything.” You held your hands up in a placating manner. “You probably don’t want to, and that’s okay. However.” You grabbed the notepad next to you and scribbled something on it, ripping off the paper and sliding it towards him. “If you’re ever bored and I’m not here, you can text me. I’ll probably answer.”

He reluctantly took the note that had your number written on it. “I cannot say I am very adept with these cellular devices.”

“Pretty sure you’re clever enough to figure it out,” you grinned like the Cheshire Cat. “But seriously, no pressure. The offer is always out there.”

“Wha?!” Stark snorted himself awake, his eyes shooting around wildly. “Rudolf? What’re you doing here?” He eyed Loki suspiciously. “You’re not going to scare away my intern, are you? That’s my job.”

You laughed, keeping Loki from spitting a venomous retort. “Good luck with that. You’ll have to try a lot harder if that’s what you’re going for, Stark.”

“Obviously. You haven’t run off yet. I’m surprised.” He took the blanket that was wrapped around him and began folding it. “Pleasantly surprised.”

“Sure, sure!” You waved him off.

Stark looked at his watch and swiped a hand through his purposely messy bed head. “It’s that time already. I better get breakfast before Pepper finds me... Alright!” He clapped. “Both of you, let’s go! Time for grub!”

Loki’s eyebrows shot up across his forehead. Was Stark actually having him join the two of you for breakfast?

“Yes, you too, Reindeer Games! One, I don’t want you in the lab alone.” That earned him Loki’s scowl. “Two, you seem to be behaving, so why not have you eat with us.”

You nudged Stark’s arm while shooting Loki an inconspicuous wink. “Awww, look at you! Already getting into Dad Mode and little Morgan hasn’t even entered the world yet.”

He nudged you back. “Yeah, yeah, yeah! Now come on. I’m starving!”

You continued to tease him as you followed him out of the lab with Loki close behind.

Loki lay in bed a few nights later, lost in thought. He could not get you out of his head. You had spoken with him like you would anyone else, deflected and stood up for him despite hardly knowing him. In the few years since he had been thrown to Midgard as punishment, Thor was the only one to show him a sliver of kindness, but even he held some hesitation. You did not. Your earlier interaction was genuine. He wasn’t sure what to make of it all.

In his perpetual deliberation, he had avoided the lab since that morning. Not that he didn’t like you. It was the uncertainty that kept him away, but that wouldn’t last much longer.

His phone settled lax in his hand, your name illuminating the screen. You had been right about him being able to learn how to text. Now it was a matter of completing the action. Tossing the phone to his other hand, he glared at the bright screen. His message had already been written. All he had to do was select “Send”. The clock at the top of the screen read two a.m. Surely, you would be asleep... But what if you weren’t?

With a huff, he pinched his eyes shut and hit the button, the swooshing sound seemingly echoing off the walls. The following silence was deafening. Luckily for him, the reply swoosh fell inline shortly after.

You: Hey, Loki. Can’t sleep?

Loki: How did you know who this was without me saying?

You: I can’t think of anyone else who would text me at this hour. ;)

Loki: I apologize if I woke you.

You: Nah. Already up. Trouble staying asleep. So what’re you up to?

Loki: Texting you.

You: Other than that, Mischief

Loki: Thinking.

You: Yeah? About what?

Loki: Possibly meandering through the Tower, again.

You: Liar ;)

Loki: Pardon?

You: You were obviously thinking about me.

Loki: What makes you say that?

You: You had to be. At least in the context that it would be better to text me than exploring.

Loki: Fair enough. Now, how do you know I am not planning to choose both?

You: You got me there.

—

Loki met you at the lab later that morning. The familiar sight of Stark was passed out, snuggling his face to a countertop, greeted you both.

Shaking your head, you huffed a laugh as you passed through the doorway. “Can’t really reprimand him when my sleep schedule is just as bad.”

Loki’s lips curled into a light smirk but didn’t speak a word lest Stark awaken and force him to leave. Despite your two hour texting session, he had been looking forward to joining you here.

“Thanks for meeting me here, by the way,” you called out to him as still stood just at the edge of the lab. “A little company while working is kind of nice. Gets too quiet when Stark finally shuts down.”

Taking a seat across from you, Loki quirks an eyebrow. “Would that not be considered a blessing?”

You stifled a chuckle as you flipped on the soldering iron and pulled out what roughly looked like a vambrace. The board you had been working on previously was molded to the shape. “If that happened by the end of my workday, yes. This early in the morning? Not so much. It’s boring if not a little eerie.”

“I see... So I am only here for your entertainment,” he feigned offense.

You gasped dramatically, “Me? Never!”

Laughing with you, Loki made himself a bit more comfortable as he watched you work. At the moment, you were adding tiny capacitors and securing them into place.

“If I may, what are you trying to accomplish?”

“Well,” you started, glancing up at him. “It’s a new piece of armor. Other than that, I technically shouldn’t say much else.”

“Right... Classified information?”

There was a twinkle of mischief in your eyes as you looked at him again. “It is a secret, but nothing quite as official as that.”

Loki leaned across the tabletop, supporting his chin in his hand. “So there is no harm in you revealing your project,” he tested.

“Harm? No. However, there will be disappointment on my end if you figure it out.”

“I accept this challenge,” he grinned playfully.

You smirked back,“As you wish, Mischief. I won’t make this easy for you.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it, Darling.”

The next several weeks chaotically blurred together. At first, you allowed Loki to observe your project as you worked on it. Once the vambrace began to take on a more unique form, you were hiding it in the mornings, opting to take on a different assignment when he was in the room. The design was strikingly Asgardian, leading him to believe the new armor was for Thor. He just needed to figure out what it did. He spoke with his brother on multiple occasions but was unable to glean anything from him. Either he had no clue or suddenly learned to lie well enough to fool Loki, the latter highly doubtful.

Apart from politely harassing you via text, Loki took to locating your hiding spots, something that proved difficult when the lab was almost always occupied by you, Stark or Banner at varying times. Stark was helping you keep this little secret, a sparkle in his eyes whenever he shooed Loki from the room when he was caught investigating. Even Banner was in on it, albeit reluctantly.

Then there was that Doctor Strange who was showing up every few days, joining you all in the lab much to Loki’s chagrin. By that point, Stark had banned him from the entire floor. The project must have been coming to a close if you all were trying to cover it up so desperately. But why Strange? Was he imbuing the vambrace with magic to protect Thor better? (Not that he really needed it.) His curiosity was certainly getting the better of him, going so far as to shape-shift as one of you three when Strange wasn’t around to get into the room. Somehow, Friday always knew and alerted the lab’s occupants who would send him back to the elevator.

It was early one morning as he was perusing the contents of the shared kitchen that you initiated contact with him. He was surprised since he had been the one to text you first lately to see if you would spill your secret.

You: Hey. Can you stop by the lab?

Loki: Oh? I thought I was banned.

You: Lifted as of a few minutes ago. So?

Loki: I suppose I might be able to grace you with my presence.

You: So kind of you, my King ;)

His heart skipped a beat at you calling him “your King”. You only used it in a teasing fashion when he was acting high and mighty. Even then, it still flustered him.

Loki made his way to the elevator, deeming it a bit devious to take the long way to the lab. You had made him wait all this time. It was your turn.

The doors reopened on the lab floor, revealing that his ploy to annoy had worked. You were leaned against the wall next to the elevator, waiting for his arrival.

“Finally! Come on!”

You audaciously grabbed his wrist and dragged him into the room with an impatient grin. Stopping him near your normal workstation, you demanded he close his eyes.

“Excuse me?” he responded incredulously, ripping his arm from your grasp.

“Please, Loki...” Your pleading eyes grew larger as you pouted at him.

Stark groaned, “Just do it, Reindeer Games, or I’ll cover them for you.”

Loki’s lips reared into a snarl as he glared at the billionaire before relenting and clenching his eyelids shut. Norns, how he hated those nicknames.

“Okay!” Excitement laced your voice. “Would you hold up your dominant hand?”

“Making more demands, Darling?”

“I did ask nicely this time.”

“That you did,” he chuckled a complied, holding out a hand.

“Perfect!”

He felt a metallic weight placed on his forearm before it was clasped together with a comfortable tightness.

“Okay. You can look now!”

The sight of the vambrace on his arm left Loki’s mouth agape. The main black of the piece was lined with gold Asgardian knot designs with runes placed in a handful of the empty spaces. Near his wrist, an artificial emerald was embedded in the armor. If he had to be completely honest, the aesthetics could rival much of the armor back home.

“Well, Kid. It looks like you rendered him speechless.” Stark nudged your arm.

Loki’s gaze shot up to the two of you. Stark was leaning against the workstation while you had hoisted yourself to sit atop it, nothing but grins on either of your faces.

“What is this-”

You cut him off, “It’s for you. We noticed after some of your missions where you had to use your seiðr more than usual, you’d end up exhausted before getting back to the Quinjet. The new armor should help with that. It’s supposed to amplify your magic without draining you.”

Stark shoved you lightheartedly, again. “The kid noticed. Told ‘em if they could come up with something that could work, I’d give whatever resources needed for the project.”

“So what do you think? I mean we still need to undergo more testing and calibrations before you can use it in the field, but-”

“You made this?” Loki locked barely tearing eyes with you. “For me?”

“Yup! Kid designed the whole thing!” Stark kept you from answering. “Minus the bits we had to bring Strange in for the wizard-y things, this was a solo run. Did a pretty good job. Not sure I could have done much better.”

“Stark...” you grumbled, clearly not used to the praise.

“This is...” Loki tore his gaze away back to the vambrace. “I don’t... I don’t know what to say.” His voice was just loud enough for you to hear.

“A ‘thank you’ would be a good start. Now maybe this little intern will get more sleep,” Stark blundered before checking his watch. “Well, it’s about time for my morning scolding. I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me!”

With that he whisked himself out of the room and to the elevator, leaving you and Loki in a terribly awkward silence.

“Hey...” you started. “If you don’t like it, we can scrap the design. It’s not a big deal-”

“Thank you.” His pupils were filled with a sincere gratefulness that few had ever seen before. “This is... This is simply splendid.”

“Really? You’re not just saying that?”

Loki spun on his heel to fully face you, his hands coming to rest on the countertop on either side of you. “I mean it, Darling. This... No one has ever done something like this for me before. I would be honored to be your test subject,” he ended with a smirk.

“Well, if that’s the case,” you grinned right back at him, “I’d say let’s get some breakfast first. There will be plenty of time to optimize the vambrace later.”

Pulling back enough to release you from his cage of arms, he gestured for you to lead the way. “After you,” he breathed.

Hopping down from the table, you held out a hand for him. Hesitantly, Loki took it while running a thumb over your knuckles as you pulled him to the elevator with you.

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starlocked01 · 4 years

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These Words are Knives

AO3

Masterpost- Previous- Next

Summary: Virgil doesn't like being a secret boyfriend. He honestly just wants his soulmate to be able to be himself at home and at work. But has Janus ever been himself with anyone? Remus probably. But Virgil and Remus don't know about each other and that's about to become everyone's problem

Content Warning: Unsympathetic Janus, Swearing, Fighting, Capslock, Emotional Abuse and Manipulation

Day 28 Anxceitmus- A sentence appears on your arm each night recapping something your soulmate said that day. Modified so that it only shows up after you've met them in person.

"If you love me, let me go If you love me, let me go These words are knives that often leave scars The fear, the fear of falling apart Truth be told I never was yours The fear, the fear of falling apart" -This is Gospel Panic! at the Disco

"Oh yes, my girlfriend and I enjoy true crime shows pretty often."

Virgil sighed, staring at the golden letters glowing on his skin. It stung a lot to see his soulmate lie like this every night.

He turned over in bed to face Janus, "I hate your boss."

"Mmhmm, me too," Janus replied flatly, not taking his eyes off the newspaper.

"I shouldn't have to see this. You shouldn't have to keep me hidden from your coworkers," Virgil felt anger knotting at the bottom of his stomach. It truly wasn't fair.

"If he finds out I'm gay, he will fire me. I'm not having this discussion right now," Janus declared with a tone of finality.

"I'm not asking you to out yourself, I'm just upset about the situation," Virgil twisted onto his back and stared at the ceiling, "what does yours say?"

Janus gave an exasperated sigh and made a show of rolling up his sleeve before reading the shiny purple text, "'Oh my god, that would definitely have killed me!' Honestly, Virgil, it was a mouse. Bit of an overreaction."

"Whatever, good night."

"Virgil?"

"What?"

"I love you."

"Love you too."

Well, it wasn't a lie, Virgil is far too trusting of him for him to not mean it when he says he loves him.

Janus could remember back when they'd first met, Virgil wouldn't even give him his phone number. It had been a tedious process getting the anxious man to open up, and it was more than worth it to Janus. The problems only started when he'd met her.

Remus had been completely unexpected; Janus had literally run into her on his way to work. He panicked that first night the neon green script appeared on his arm opposite the purple text. Remus was also his soulmate and unlike Virgil, she was eager to know Janus.

Janus had made his decision to keep his second soulmate a secret the moment he saw the text, and now he sat like a spider atop his web of lies.

Janus glanced over at Virgil as he lay there, clearly not asleep yet, and started humming a lullaby that usually helped Virgil relax. The tension in his shoulders started to ease and soon he was snoring. Janus folded up the newspaper and took the disposable phone out of his nightstand.

R<3: heyyyy sexy i wanna c u tomrw ;]

He smiled and responded, keeping an eye on Virgil to make sure he was still asleep.

J: I agree, at our usual place?

R<3: !!!!!!

He quickly shut off the phone and hid it again before turning off the bedside lamp and rolling over to fall asleep. ---- Truth be told, it was simply easier to talk about Remus at work because they went by multiple pronouns. It also helped that they didn't immediately get suspicious anytime Janus brought them up. Virgil’s concern could be overbearing and it was just easier to stay under the radar of homophobic coworkers who would no longer respect him if they found out.

He didn't feel good about lying; it was survival. But he was good at it.

"Jan!" Remus waved him over as soon as he arrived at the restaurant. He smiled and joined them at their table, "it's been too long, why are you avoiding me?" Remus asked with a grin.

"I'm not, I just don't want to interrupt your work," Janus smirked, taking a sip of his water.

"What? You don't think I could handle you trying to distract me?" Remus laughed happily, leaning over to kiss their soulmate’s cheek.

They laughed and joked all through dinner, gossiping about coworkers, generally having a good time. The time got away from Janus and it was midnight before he realized how late it had gotten.

"Oh! I want to see what your soul mark says today!" Remus beamed, excitedly rolling up their own sleeve.

"You do tend to have quite… entertaining quotes," Janus' smile hid his irritation but he obliged, rolling up his sleeve as well, "'Why don't we eat the babies and call it Swifting?' Really, Remus? Do I want context?"

"You remember 'A Modest Proposal' by Jonathan Swift, right?" he giggled, reading his own quote of the day, "'Honestly, Virgil, it was a mouse.' Huh…" Remus looked confused, "who's Virgil? You don't talk about him but I see his name come up pretty often."

"A coworker. He's not very pleasant to talk with but we often have projects together," the lie was smooth as silk. He knew this one would happen someday and had prepared.

Remus glanced over and saw a streak of purple along Janus’ wrist of his other arm, "what's that?" they grabbed Janus' wrist and pushed the sleeve up before he could protest. They read the words out loud, "'sup, fellow cryptids? I'm your host, Virgil Keir and it's time to talk about why you absolutely should run to the woods to date the Fae.' Wait…" Remus looked up knowingly, "Virgil is your soulmate, not your coworker."

"He can be both. Like I said, he's not easy to get along with-" Janus was sweating under his collar.

"I want to meet him!" Remus exclaimed.

"Why?' Janus was genuinely puzzled by their reaction.

"Hello! I love his youtube channel and you're my easy in! Plus he's your soulmate so he's gotta be important to you, which makes him all the more important to me," Remus grinned happily, "I swear I'm not jealous that you have two soulmates."

Janus let the comment slide past him, "I'll talk with him, but he's rather private. He may not want to meet you. I mean, he hasn't asked about you at all."

"Alright alright. Thanks, Jan!" Remus kissed him again, "wanna stay the night?" they asked with a wink.

"Not tonight, we both have work tomorrow and it's late enough already," Janus gave them a silvery smile while standing to pay the bill.

"Aw man, I can't wait to tell Stormy about this!" Remus pulled out their phone and was already texting with fire in their eyes.

"Who’s Stormy?" Janus asked hesitantly.

"Tumblr mutual. He's like the biggest fan of 'Mothman Mondays'. He'll be so stoked!"

"Ah- well have fun with that. Goodnight, darling," Janus left quickly. This needed to be contained. ---- Virgil stared at his phone in disbelief.

thotiestthoughts: stormy ull nvr guess!!

thotiestthoughts: my soulmate knows Virgil K!!!

Thoti was probably Virgil’s favorite fan, they messaged on tumblr all the time and had become quite good friends, but it was through his anonymous account not the official blog for his show. He debated how he would respond before typing back.

stormcloud07734: wow what a coincidence. r u secretly him? ;)

The best defense is a strong offense, right?

thotiestthoughts: !!!! im so excite!!!!!!

stormcloud07734: that means u must live pretty close to him

thotiestthoughts: u think hes in Orlando???

Virgil smiled. He knew he was in Orlando. But he had a better idea.

stormcloud07734: don't know about Virgil but im in Orlando. wanna meet up?

His heart was pounding. If this were anyone else but thoti he'd never consider it.

thotiestthoughts: OMG WHEN? RN?

stormcloud07734: how about tomorrow?

Virgil smiled at thoti's enthusiasm. They both picked a local cafe to meet in the afternoon and signed off for the night. Virgil didn’t even wait for Janus to get home before falling asleep. ---- Virgil got to the cafe an hour early. He could barely feel his own breathing as his heart felt like it filled his whole chest and stomach. What if he was wrong and thoti turned out to be a creep or stalker? What if he was never heard from again? He hadn't even said goodbye to Janus that morning. He tried to scroll tumblr to calm down, tried to research for his next episode, anything to distract himself from the anticipation and anxiety.

Remus couldn't wait to meet stormy and was practically bouncing around the back seat of xyr Uber. He'd given xem his phone number since they'd never shared photos and xe was trying desperately to not call before xe got to the cafe.

About a block away xyr phone started ringing. It was stormy.

"Hello?" Xe answered breathlessly.

An all too familiar voice answered xem, "hey, thoti, I know you're not here just yet but I have a bit of a confession to make."

"Virgil…" Remus was practically shoved out of the car by the driver as xe was paralyzed in shock. Xe looked up and saw the familiar pale face, purple hair with swooping bangs and dark eyeshadow smiling at him from a table in the corner, phone held to his face.

"Yup, sorry," Virgil hung up as Remus walked over, mouth agape.

"All this time?" xe asked, not ready to sit at the table with one of xyr favorite minor celebrities.

"Yeah, I kinda like participating in cryptid culture without being hounded about my videos," Virgil shrugged with a grin, "come on, sit down. I'm a lot more like stormcloud than I am like my videos."

"I'm Remus," xe stuck out xyr hand.

"Virgil," he snickered and pinched Remus' fingers with three of his own and gave a curt little shake. Xe laughed and sat down across the table, fidgeting with xyr hoodie strings. Virgil gave xem a long look over, "so your soulmate knows me?"

"Oh yeah, I kinda found out last night and asked him to ask you to meet me so if he brings that up, sorry. I just got really excited about it," Remus blushed in embarrassment, "hopefully Janus will be cool about it."

Virgil stopped mid-sip of a mocha latte, "Janus?"

"Yeah, our soulmate."

"You're his soulmate too? I don't believe you," Virgil shook his head.

"I saw both lines of writing on his arms last night, I'm sure of it!" Remus' grin began to falter, "but whatever, right? We're not here to talk about soulmates. I've been so excited to meet you."

"Hang on, how long?" Virgil demanded.

"How long what? My d-"

"How long have you been soulmates?" Virgil smacked the table.

"About 5 months," Remus looked down at the table. This was going terribly.

"Janus has been my soulmate for 2 years and he never brought up a second soulmate. I can't-" Virgil looked like something inside him was dying, "why wouldn't he mention you?"

"He- oh my god he doesn't want me around… and you probably hate me just for existing…" Remus looked up as Virgil laid a hand gently on xyrs.

"No. I don't hate you. We're going to get to the bottom of this." ---- Virgil sat in bed next to Janus who was preoccupied with a book. He didn't know how to bring up Remus and every moment he felt sicker and sicker in his stomach. The frequent fights, the talk at work about a girlfriend, the distance between them, when he thought about it he realized it had only really started 5 months ago.

Janus reached out to take his hand and Virgil instinctively pulled away.

"What's wrong, Virgil?" Janus asked sweetly.

"Don't touch me," he muttered just as the clock struck midnight. He glanced at the yellow text without bothering to read it, "I bet this one is a lie too."

"Virgil, what do you mean? You're acting suspicious," Janus’ mind was reeling. He'd forgotten what Virgil had said he was going to do that day and didn't expect him to be so hostile. He glanced down at the purple text on his arm and asked, "who's 'thoti', Virgil?"

Virgil started to reply when he saw a flash of green on his own arm. He looked and was surprised to find a second soul mark in a dark green scrawl. His phone was ringing and he didn't even need caller ID to know who it was, "are you seeing this too, Rem?" Virgil's eyes flicked over to Janus and narrowed, "a second soulmate, who could have guessed?" Janus kept his face impressively passive at the news and subtle accusation, "okay, see you soon."

Virgil hung up and glared at Janus who simply repeated, "who's 'thoti', Virgil?"

"You insufferable bastard! You know exactly who xe is, your 'girlfriend' our soulmate," Virgil scowled, ready to tear out a throat and leave the body for the wolves. He saw that Remus had texted him that xe was 10 minutes away. Janus had nowhere to run now.

"Her name is Remus. Why would I assume she was your soulmate or that you would give her such a disrespectful nickname?" Janus tried to steer the conversation in his favor.

"You're going to accuse me of disrespect? For the last five months, you have done nothing but lie to us and you're saying I'm the disrespectful one? You can't deflect your way out of this one, babe," Virgil felt his eye twitch. Remus better get there fast if he wanted both soulmates intact.

Virgil was screaming and beating Janus with a pillow when the doorbell rang.

"What the fuck? Is this a confrontation or a sleepover?" Remus burst in the door, finding it unlocked. He ran over and pulled Virgil off of Janus, getting a face full of feathers in the process.

"Oh just casual domestic abuse," Janus picked himself off the floor as Virgil struggled to get out of Remus' grasp.

"I'm going to make him pay, one way or another!" Virgil snarled.

"I don't know, Virgil, I think we can work this out," he blurted out.

Virgil stared at Remus dumbfounded, "you think what? Work this out? He's lied to you the whole time you've known him!"

"So did you," Remus looked down as if ashamed to say it out loud, "I thought you were stormcloud. I gushed about Virgil to you for hours and you never thought to tell me who you really were. I bet you even got content ideas from me and never had to credit them. So how is that different, if not worse, than Janus being scared of you doing exactly what you're doing right now?"

"You really think having an anonymous tumblr is worse than being manipulated for years? Is that what I'm hearing, Remus?"

"I think you're overreacting. I want to try and fix this relationship because we're soulmates and we should be able to make it work," Remus sighed, turning away from Virgil, "I'm not cutting anyone off."

"It's alright, Virgil. I forgive you. Let's figure this out together-"

"NO!" something snapped. Virgil squared up, facing the other two, "get out."

"Virgil," Janus took a step towards him.

"I said, Get Out."

"Oh, did you forget? The lease is in my name. I'm not leaving my fucking apartment. If you don't want to work with us then you can work on getting your own place to live," Janus’ look turned smug and cold as ice.

"Janus, don't kick him out," Remus looked as though he were about to spiral into a panic attack. If he'd just kept his mouth shut for once maybe-

"No, he's right. He holds shelter and food over my head to keep me in line so he can keep a secret fuck boy on the side and expects me to 'work it out' like I'm too scared to fend for myself. Fuck you," Virgil started to laugh with tears streaming down his cheeks. He turned and grabbed his backpack, walking to their room to grab as much of his stuff as he could. Remus followed him, holding Janus back from saying anything more.

"Virgil, please. I don't want to lose you," Remus pleaded softly.

"I thought you were pissed at me for being a liar on the internet," Virgil muttered.

"Maybe, but if I'm willing to forgive Janus don't you think I can forgive you too?" Remus held up his arm to block the door.

Virgil stopped with a heavy exhausted sigh, "I don't want your forgiveness. Remus, if you love me, let me go."

Virgil watched as a tear slipped down Remus' face and he lowered his arm. The rage that fueled him broke and he grabbed Remus in a hug. The other stiffened, uncertain, before relaxing and hugging Virgil back.

"I didn't want to leave you; I just can't stay with him," Virgil fought to keep his voice from trembling as much as his shoulders were shaking.

"I'll see if my landlord can add you on my lease… that way you don't have to leave?" Remus offered hopefully.

"That sounds like a thousand more nights spent screaming. Not a good idea," Virgil broke away from the hug, "thank you, Remus."

"You… you know how to find me if you need me," Remus laughed sullenly.

"Thanks. I'm sorry."

Remus only nodded as Virgil made for the front door.

"If you leave right now, you'll never see him again," Janus spoke from his place on the couch, wine glass in hand, and already half-empty in the short time Virgil spent packing.

"I know. Anything to keep me from fighting you, right? Just watch me find a way to be happy, asshole," Virgil spat before walking out without a second glance back. ---- "Virgil?"

"What?"

"I love you."

"No, you don't!" Virgil hissed, pushing himself away as hard as he could.

"Virgil, I know I'm not your soulmate but I am confident about my feelings for you," Logan looked confused and hurt but all Virgil could see was a cold, sly smile he'd tried so hard to forget. Reality started to blur and Virgil began to hyperventilate while the smirk leered closer, "Virgil, it's me, Logan. In for four."

Virgil focused on the calming voice and followed its instructions. After a few minutes, he could see Logan’s living room, feel the blanket tangled around their feet, the soft touch of his best friend pulling him back from the edge.

"Logan, I- I'm-"

"Don't apologize. There's nothing to apologize for," Logan held him close, resting his chin in Virgil’s hair, "you were clearly triggered. I did not mean to hurt you and your lashing out wasn't directed at me."

"But I know you aren't him, it's not fair for me to treat you that way," Virgil shuddered, pushing in to be as close to Logan as possible.

"Perhaps not, but I'm choosing to forgive it because I know this isn't easy for you," Logan smiled rubbing small circles on his back, "I will learn one thousand different ways to show you my appreciation and care if those three little words are ineffective and harmful to you."

"I don't deserve you," Virgil's voice was muffled as he buried his face in Logan’s chest to hide the tears threatening to spill over.

"No, you deserve so much more than I can give you, and you didn't deserve what happened in the past," Logan kissed the top of his head sweetly.

Virgil choked back a sob, "don't your soulmates hate me?"

Logan sighed, "no. They are happy together and I am happy for them. It has been a while since I've talked to either Patton or Roman, but I think they're okay with me finding you. Not every breakup is toxic, nor are all soulbonds romantic."

They stayed curled together like that on the couch for quite a while, the movie they'd been watching left forgotten on pause.

"Are you happy, Logan?" Virgil whispered, breaking the easy silence.

"With you, yes."

"Promise?"

"I promise I won't lie to you. I am happy with you, Stormcloud," Logan squeezed him tighter, trying to impart every ounce of his love with the application of force. He never wanted to be the one hurting Virgil, and if he ever met Janus or Remus, there was a baseball bat with their names on it in the corner.

Tag List: @stoicpanther @ifrickenhatedeverythingaboutthis @idontgiveafuckaboutshit @tsshipmonth2020

#tsshipmonth2020 #Soulmate September 2020 #toxic anxceitmus #toxic anxceit #unsympathetic janus #platonic analogical #angst #hurt comfort #emotional manipulation #emotional abuse #swearing #fighting #this hurt so much to write

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secretgamergirl · 4 years

Text

Abuse I’ve just had to sit with forever

Right now I can’t look anywhere without seeing people speaking up about abusive monsters in various positions of power and it’s really triggering a lot of PTSD for me about all the times I’ve been in positions like that where nobody has ever listened or tried to help so... I’m just going to rattle off all the ones that come to my head, anonymously, and I don’t know, if anyone who knows me wants to ask me about any of these and/or try to really do something to help, maybe come talk to me about it through whatever private channel we talk in sometimes.

Family stuff. There’s a lot, and there’s no real way to talk about any of it anonymously because I mean being members of my family it’s already narrowed down way too much.

Someone once put me in the temporary care of a woman who savagely beat me because her own children were making too much noise when they should have been asleep. Bad enough that when I went back to school I was almost ripped out of my home by child protective services on the assumption that’s where it happened. Oh and she also force-fed me rotten food with maggots in it. I ended up pretty sick as a result, lost a whole lot of weight, and ended up with a serious eating disorder that’s plagued me since. I did eventually get out of there but I don’t know that I’ve ever really conveyed the full extend of it.

One of that woman’s children had some sort of torture kink, very nearly killed me, did put me in the hospital from injuries, and might have raped me. Hard to say because I was like... 7? Hard to translate those memories now that I have the context and vocabulary. I tried to explain that to anyone who’d listen at the time but, again, I didn’t have the vocabulary and I don’t think it came across that like... ropes and tools were involved, not just fists. Never got into that with therapists, because the first one I had really loved playing gatekeeper with trans stuff and liked the “maybe you just think you’re a girl because of abuse as a child” line of thinking too much already. I think I heard he eventually landed in prison though, so that’s something?

The first job I ever had. Games website. I was too young to be working but nobody ever thought to ask about it, and my family needed the extra income to avoid homelessness besides. The owner of the site... was really into open sexual roleplay in workplace text chats. I was so young and weirdly sheltered that I didn’t even process that that was even a thing, and 90% of it went straight over my head, plus I was in a weird state at the time with the whole trans thing where oh yeah, if anyone’s doing any roleplaying stuff on the internet, I’ll be in the character of me-but-a-girl but everything is pretend here right? So... there was a whole lot of mounting and thrusting being described and it took a few years to sink in that that was not in fact about him pretending to be a knight with me as a horse or something. And there was also a lot of... failing to pay me for years of backbreaking work, outright stealing from me, and I mean, I was up until like 4 AM every night working while still in high school. So, yeah. that was a lot. Never told anybody about any of this. So far as I know he still runs the site and nobody’s ever confronted him about anything.

Used to try to play various RPGs with some people in this extra niche-y game space. Sort of the first place I was ever read as a woman without offering anyone “corrections.” And... there was just this one guy who whenever he was GMing had some weird creative excuse for my character (usually the only woman in the party) to... be raped and/or impregnated just all of the sudden and totally out of left field. Which everyone was OK with somehow. And when he wasn’t GMing he was all over my character of course. Never really spoke up to anyone. I just left one day.

Ended up... in the inner circle of someone very famous. Mostly famous for being a victim of abuse. Which is why I ignored... every single red flag there is that someone is an abusive person and taking advantage of everyone around them. They controlled every aspect of my life for years. Had me do a whole lot of work for them, place myself in real physical and psychological danger, regularly. Directly asked me to severe ties with most people in my life. Install kill-switch sortware on my laptop for their piece of mind that none of our conversations would ever be seen by anyone, while also making me talk only in privately managed chat services where they logged everything and my screen wiped at regular intervals, and insisting I use an untraceable alias in it. All of this I was constantly assured was for my own safety as much as theirs, somehow, and that I was their most valued friend who they would keep safe, start paying a huge salary to soon, as well as help secure me a safe place to live and get properly started on medical transition stuff that I was unable to do in the increasingly unsafe place I was living at the time. I could keep going with this, but again, I don’t want anyone playing guessing games. Eventually, as serial abusers do, this person got sick of me, cast me out, and said presumably unspeakable things about me to everyone in that social circle, because everyone quite promptly cut all ties to me without a word. I once mentioned some small fraction of this publicly in defense of... multiple people attempting suicide as a result of this person’s abuse, and it was made very, very clear to me that this is not someone I will ever be able to safely speak about in public.

Another person who is very famous, with ties to abuse prevention stuff, added me to a blacklist to kill my career prospects and then kinda put a hit out on me on a neo-nazi website, but I’ve written about that incident. Nothing happened as a result of speaking out aside from the violence I was already being subjected to ramping up and more people cutting ties with me. Oh and those who didn’t are still quite friendly with her.

Several women with ties to... dangerous people randomly got it into their heads several years ago that I posed some sort of threat to someone I am told they “feel very protective towards” and... unleashed a hell on me unlike anything I have ever seen. I have spent the past 6 years now dealing with death threats from far right terrorist organizations who in some cases have very sizeable body counts, and those groups don’t scare me anywhere near as much as these people. Anyone else I have seen them paint a target on completely withdrew from the internet their careers and any sort of public life to try and stay off their radar. I have had multiple people privately confide in me that they had been threatened never to speak to me again before proceeding to make good on that. I have individually thrown myself at the mercy of every single one of them, explained that I have absolutely no ill will towards any of them, and had never even heard of this person they’re “protecting” before they started coming after me. Nothing has worked. They’ve never stopped. I’m legitimately afraid someone connected to them is going to murder me some day, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve confided in all of maybe 3 people about this. One might be dead, one is a total hermit, the third briefly tried supporting me, received threats, and promptly retracted everything, replacing it with a fire and brimstone speech about how I am an evil monster who tricked them. I have regular nightmares about this, and collapse into a shivering heap just seeing any of their names mentioned.

I... spent a good deal of time in social contact with a person I have been told I need to be friends with to advance in a career I would like to pursue. While doing so, he sabotaged a project that was fairly important to me, and I saw some him mistreat someone else in ways I find quite disturbing, but that’s her story to tell and not mine. I don’t feel comfortable around him, and have no real choice but to give up on those dreams. Haven’t really discussed this anywhere. The sort of work I can get would definitely vanish completely if I did.

The sort of work I can get also involves working for a variety of companies with people very high up the ranks who have seriously harmed a number of people I consider to be very good friends, in ways that in some cases include sexual abuse, and I... really would prefer not to ever work for anyone employing such people now that I am aware of this.

Yet another famous person, but one who I feel perfectly comfortable naming, Graham Linehan, used to follow me on social media with a level of enthusiasm that could arguably be better referred to as stalking. Then later he joined some extremist anti-trans hate group and rose to the top pretty quickly. And some years after that, it finally sank in that worshiping a trans woman while also leading a group of people bent on killing us all, so he has been very loudly and very publicly rambling about his hatred for me specifically. I don’t really have to speak up about this one because he’s doing plenty of that on his end, but I do have to note that while this famous person terrorizing me hasn’t really earned me any sort of public defense or sympathy, it has encouraged a whole lot of people to invent an alternate timeline of events where I am directly responsible for him being a bigot, leading to me getting dangerous threats from both horrible bigots and people who claim to hate horrible bigots but have suspiciously poor aim.

Hey speaking of celebrities, one of the stars of Firefly used to regularly send me photos of violently distended testicles. One of the stars of Star Trek once posted something encouraging millions of social media followers to attack me and left it up for a weekend. One of the producers of World of WarCraft once threatened to sue me for libel and went on a big PR tour about it, speaking on podcasts and such, and so many fascists pretending to be journalists have dumped so much crap on me...

And not to long ago in something of a wacky mixup, someone ELSE rather famous, who does diversity consulting no less, confused me for someone else and cut loose with a horrific bit of hate and gossip and throwing me under the bus, and misgendering me, saying random harassers baselessly calling me a pedophile were probably onto something. Privately told a handful of people about that, because I thought she was a friend and that was so heartbreaking, but anyone I told is just pretending not to have seen it.

Someone was once offering me help because I was in a dangerous situation, financially. I explained that things had been extra hard since coming out as trans. Suddenly he goes from helpful and concerned to just... violent. Screaming a me, openly trying to chase me out of the space we were both in. I reported this to the proper people. They tried talking, he left. The whole community mourned the loss and wondered who could have driven him off. Still doesn’t feel like a safe place for me.

I don’t really know why I’m bothering with all of this. Nobody is actually going to help. I’d say nobody is actually going to read this, but I’m sure plenty of people who hate me will to see if I’m talking about them and use it as justification to make things worse. Plus some people I’m not talking about I’m sure. I get plenty of that all the time.

Nothing ever helps and you can’t ever win. If you try to keep the abusers appeased by not outing them, the abuse never stops. If you try to speak up, their fans and friends treat it like declarations of war and pile on. If you just try to be there for other people when they’re being abused, you get singled out as a “troublemaker” and added to hit lists and black lists and... nothing works.

I don’t want a lot out of life. I want to know I have enough food, and have a place to live where I’m not at risk of dying from either temperature extreme, a bathroom, enough room for my book shelves, a bed, a couch, a dinner table, and a yoga mat. Maybe a space where my cats can run around a little enclosed semi-outdoor area for the fresh air and sun. I want to be able to deal with my medical problems. I want to see and talk to friends sometimes. If I’m really greedy, I’d like to have all that for a particular friend too who I’m constantly worrying about dying of poverty. And I’d like to be able to work on games. Maybe play them sometimes. Maybe watch things.

And that’s the really messed up part. Because abusive people and people supporting the structures of abuse always say they just want to focus on getting work done, or having fun, and it’s a lie. What’s most important for them is perpetuating abuse. They could just stop, or get rid of the people doing it, and the rest of us could live our lives and everything would be fine. But no instead we have to drop everything and make sure no woman anywhere feels safe enough to even breath.

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adevotedappraisal · 6 years

Video

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DNA. By Kendrick Lamar from DAMN.

What is that there, lying in the heart of man? What is there composing the shifting totality of a person? Is it that rushing ambition to conquer? To eliminate? Is the heart of man to assimilate this environment around it in order to live with it? Or is it to be a library of emotions, compiling sights, sounds and snippets of experiences that make up the whole of a person? Or is it yet the limitations, the things outside of one’s reach that define the person? You see I think this Compton, California rapper ruminated on questions similar to this and, like the great poet Walt Whitman, concluded that the soul can never be greater than the body and that the body cannot be greater than the soul, and he tried to coincide this with the pursuit of making an album that reaches out to try to be everything to everyone, and I think this approach reveals Kendrick Lamar letting go parts of himself to the hearth of the past in order to become the great American rap artist he needs to be.

What if your life doesn’t flash before your eyes when you die? What if your life plays before your ears, in uncompressed audio? Hey what if, like, you died and instead of Saint Peter there was Kid Capri rocking your book of life? Wouldn’t that be unexpected yet ill? And what if you replayed this book-of-life album in the reverse order and it flowed well and you could still tease out some meaning, or imagined meaning from the whole thing? Well some of this is what is going with Kendrick Lamar’s latest album DAMN., an album more open-ended and undefined than his previous releases, even as the songs explore his issues in this bold, concise and direct way.

And what is this talk about this album being ‘everything to everyone’? And what is this ‘direct way’ I speak of? What are these euphemisms in service of? Well, a buncha shiny, well-produced sellout songs to be curt. But hold on now, we gotta unpack that a bit because this is Kendrick we’re talking about, not some genre artist tossing up a hail mary of Pop fluff to prevent being dropped from their label. This is Kendrick Lamar, who achieved his breakthrough year behind his most experimental and dense album, 2015s To Pimp a Butterfly.(review) It’s like if Stevie Wonder gained a strong following on Songs in the Key of Life but blew up internationally after releasing his obscure, mostly instrumental album Journey into the Secret Life of Plants. The point being that any foray into contemporary sounds here is not an act of gasping desperation, but a considered and meaningful exploration, because let’s be honest here, after the positive reception from his leftovers EP untitled unmastered, ( he could have launched into his Miles Davis-esque electric period for a couple years and no one would’ve batted an eye.

So these songs that take a nod to the radio (there go the euphemisms again, look make no mistake, these radio songs condescend heavily to modern sounds, in a near cynical display) must be judged on the ultimate efficacy of the end result. At the end of the day, does Kung Fu Kenny sound good doing this shuffle? For the most part, yes he does. It comes off more like the Nile Rodgers produced Let’s Dance album by David Bowie, as opposed to, say, any Mick Jagger solo album, or Hammer’s 2 Legit 2 Quit or something. In fact, you know how every now and then Fat Joe sometimes gets on some modern production of the moment and turns it into a Bronx anthem? Kendrick is like that at times here, like with “ELEMENT.,” a sparse head-nodder with Lamar rhyming, not too complex and rapid fire, but in a nonchalant and playful style, reminiscent of If You’re Reading This It’s Too Late-era Drake, warning “we ain’t going back to broke families selling dope” at one moment and doing a spot on Juvenile “Ha” impression the next, or with “GOD.,” a splendid slice of rap-pop of braggadocio with reverberating shimmering synths, synth bass and understated drums, Kendrick stretching out lines in the ear candy chorus with joyful relish. He sounds comfortable here, experimenting with his words, slowing the cadence, singing a line here, doing a Quavo-esque ad lib there, making his presence in the radio and streaming playlists of people the way the Rakims and Daddy Kanes had to do in decades of yore.

You see the great MCs, I mean the ones in peoples top ten, weren’t aloof, reclusive emperors tossing down sprawling, screeds without choruses from the castle tower. Nah, they were politicians, trying their best to get on the dancefloor of the club, shaking hands, kissing babies, prodding you to sing the chorus for them on the count of four. His grip on this enterprise though becomes shaky on first single “HUMBLE.,” where he’s lumbering in an awkward gait on a Mike Will Made It beat which kinda sounds like a drunk, spastic Thelonious Monk banging keys in a strip club, and he’s the same on “LOYALTY.” with Rhianna. Over a clean, cosmopolitan groove, with waxy, reversed voices floating by, the two remind us that loyalty and trust are central to any relationship, a prerequisite for love in fact. Rhianna is fine here, intriguing even with her cool realisations and raps, but Kendrick is near anonymous on the song, reduced to a wallflower mumble on the summer cookout-ready banger.

While some songs are set up to accompany a cool, night at a trendy scene or as perfect driving music, some other songs have a density to them, made ornate and true with the person inside them. “DNA.” is like this, with Kendrick in full command on a pair of Mike Will Made It beats, telling us all about this things wrought and proud within him. As confident as he is on the sitar slinking around the cool stroll of the 808 drums, by the second beat he’s barely contained, belittling and dismissing unnamed rivals over a booming beat frenzied with a hectic vocal sample. The song captures your attention and doesn’t let go. It’s easily the best opener of any album of his.

“XXX.” with U2 is one of the emotional centers of the album, with the first verse –over some Ice Cube Bomb Squad era beat– showing an incensed Kendrick telling a man seeking advice for a dead relative that he would seek revenge by gun violence if it were him, offering no solace to the inquisitor, only blunt street invective. The second verse, with Bono crooning about America with a knowing reflection that recalls the slower songs on the Side B of his Joshua Tree album, show Kendrick proposing that the violence in him and around this country are one and the same, existing in him with the same barely constrained ferocity that exists in U.S. domestic and foreign policy sometimes. I always like this conceptual side to Lamar, and we see it again with “FEAR.,” although its middle verse features a too-subdued Kendrick talking about all the things he thought he could die by when he was a late teen. It’s too elementary, not only in comparison to the fiery and self-reflective first and third verses but to the nature of this beat. This Alchemist beat would be the darling heart to any number of East Coast MCs winter albums. With its ruminating bassline, flints of funk guitar, snatches of organ fills and samples of soul vocal lines, runs and hums, the beat was made for blunt wrappers, freestyle sessions and those thick studio monitor headphones that so often look like halos. Black Thought would’ve kicked the teeth in this beat. Royce could murder this for four, five verses easy. It’s in this context that Kendrick falters, the sober nature of his fears blunted by the warm fog of this beat.

He fares better with “DUCKWORTH,” yet another soul voice and harmony sample chop, this time by 9th Wonder adroitly stitching three different beats together to match temporal and mood changes. Over this now Kendrick is commanding, telling a story of an up and coming gangster who meets with a wily fast food drive-thru worker, shading in the two characters with tales of hood agility and cross country wanderlust. The ending of the song talks about a choice not taken, and the choice that could’ve been taken and the resultant death that would’ve occurred to our not-so-faithful narrator.

I mean this album is obsessed with violence, is moody and is suspicious of people when it’s not celebrating the trappings of being the most talked about rapper around. It’s all over the place thematically but self-assured musically in the way that a lot of self-titled albums were made once upon a time. You know I think that’s what this is in a sense, Kendrick Lamar’s Kendrick Lamar album, a self-portrait of the artist as young man, all dressed up in a life-flashes-before-your-eyes concept album framework, but there it is, a glimpse of the changing man and his vulpine ambitions, what he gained and what he’s let go of, a launching pad from which he could go in any direction next go around, no doubt engendering questions again. Because he, like us, as the Brooklyn poet Whitman reminds, contradicts himself, for he is large, and he does contain multitudes.

#music #rap #hiphop #Kendrick Lamar #damn #DNA #music review

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trickstersantana · 6 years

Text

[Para: Tina/Elliott/Santana] Of Tales and Reunions

Who: Santana, Tina @cohentoplaywithmagic , Elliott @ellnaturae , and two mysterious individuals. Location: Yanaka Cemetary, Tokio, Japan Time: 10th May, 2018 Summary: When the free time starts, Tina, Elliott and Santana has an encounter with someone who has been insisting her to met outside campus and also has contacted with the group. Triggers/Notes: Death talk and lying liars who lies

Santana got out of the cementery with Elliott and Tina nearby. She looked at her phone and the last weird text she recieved, now that she has ‘free time’. They said the place where she was, and the clothes she was wearing, and there were all from the mysterious stalker that somehow keeps getting more and more information about her. She looked around to find whose stranger was the person behind it. “Hey guys, wait a moment, I have to reunite with some weird person who is stalking me and probably beat them out” She warned the others without giving them any context whatsoever.

Elliott was walking next to Tina hoping they could go next to a most cheerful place. He had been lost in thought for a while, even if the place was beautiful cementeries always reminded him how fragile human life is, and that made him think if someday he would just lost everyone he cared about. Suddenly the words "reunite with some weird person stalking me" got him back to reality "Wait what?" he asked out loud turning to look at Santana and then looking at Tina trying to find confirmation that he heard right.

Tina seeing all the cherry blossoms, no one could blame her from thinking about the Ouran Highschool Host Club and slightly imaging who everyone would be in that anime. The ceremony was beautiful but her weeb brain was caught up in spinning her own AU version of it. A soft smile on her face as she was humming...okay slightly singing the theme,"Kiss...kiss fall in love," as she mindlessly walked along with Elliott but her thoughts halted when Santana spoke. "What in the....Santana you are what?" She looks at Elliott nodding because, he had heard right.

Someone in the crowd got closer to the group from behind, they walked fast without doubt, with the determination of someone who expects to be instantly loved every time someone sees them. “Hay everyone!” A cheerful young voice called to the trio, while waving their hand effusively to greet them. “Thanks for waiting for me even when I’m late!” said the short, white, black haired teen with the backpack. They looked like every annoying younger sibling that ever appeared on a sitcom combined into one. They pointed at Tina “Hay Silent Cry for Help and Professional Hugger! Nice to meet you for realsies!” They exclaimed excited, and looked at Santana with a triumphal smile. “I told you I always get what I want, Senorita!”

Santana looked at the voice calling to them, and if she could, she would look at the camera like she was on the office. “You must be kidding me.” She said irked, looking down. “Is this you, really? What are you, six?” How the fuck a kid got her number. “Who the fuck are you?”

Elliott frowned so confused he thought his eyebrows will fall off his face. Was that the same person sending him weird messages about a farm full of Shedim in Texas? "What the fuck" he let out.

Tina feels a chill as this stalker, was literally a stalker. When she hard the name 'Silent Cry for Help' ...like they had actually found them in Japan and they weren't a NYADA student. "Who even are you?" She looks at the little kid, in agreement with Santana, like what the aether was a child doing stalking a Shedim, Trickster Spirit and a Witch?

Someone smiles brightly, they love strong reactions, but quickly frowed. “I’m not six! In three years I’ll be basically an adult!” they complained, but quickly smiled again. “Who do /y’all/ think I am? I left y'all enough clues, didn’t I?” They said with a big grin.“Guess my name”

Santana rolled her eyes. She didn’t trust this kid. She really didn’t trust this kid, and she knew what kind of distrust this was. “Rumpelstiltskin”

Elliott looks at Santana and the kid, did she have any idea who he was? He found himself trying to remember the anonymous messages but he gave up easily, why did he have to follow this kid's absurd game? "An asshole" he said as if that was his guess.

Tina could not believe that the kid was for real. Santana said it so casually about the kid appearing up. She laughs at Santana's answer and in parcel agreement with Senpai's answer. "A three year old who shouldn't even be on Tumblr."

Someone suddenly doesn’t feel that much welcome. “Wrong, wrong, wrong!” they said with teary eyes. “You guys are so mean!” they complained chocking back tears. Luckyly for them, the cavalry was coming. A suspicious man with a suit and sunglasses put his hand on their shoulders, and looked at the team through his sunglasses. “She isn’t here, llorica. You lost” He said non-challand. “Is the kid bothering you?” he ask the group of adults making a teenager cry.

Santana froze when the man appeared. This wasn’t happening. He couldn’t be here. Not with Tina and Elliott. This has to be an illusion. “’Dad’? The fuck are you doing here?”

Elliott didn't trust the kid, it made him feel bad that he was sad because he looked young and small, but there was something off. When the older man approached them he felt something else change, he had felt something similar in the past, distrust, but this was so much strong, that man, for Elliott, seemed dangerous. He wasn' sure what to do but he wanted to be alert in case something happened, so he moved closer to Santana though not very far from Tina, he wanted to be ready enough to protect them if something went wrong. "Wait... what did you just say?" he looked at Santana extremelly surprised.

Tina could feel the black blutterflies in her stomach fluttering harder at the appearance of the other man. Her palms feel a little sweaty from two strangers that seemed to know them more they knew about them. Everything felt uneasy and uncomfortable. Their is a tight grip on her phone, not in hopes to use a spell but a chance to call anyone who was needed since magic was limited here. Her eyes shot at Santana when the word 'dad' left Santana's lips. Aether this was not gonna be good at all.

Someone stopped crying but seemed annoyed. “Is her!” they said pointing at Santana. “I won and you have to keep your part of the deal!” they pouted to the old man. The man looked at Santana, not recognizing her. "I haven’t seen you in my life” he said.

Santana sometimes forgot she looked totally different now. She felt how unconfortable was always to be with more than one trickster, and she only had to deal with 2, and was used to way more, not like Tina and Elliott. But it still was her dad, in the flesh, if this really wasn’t an illusion. And he didn’t recognize her. She has to show him who she is “I can’t believe you dared to come again, you Old Bastard, you didn’t just betray me back them, or the rest of your so called ‘family’, you betrayed the mere concept of trust. We forgave too many things, but this one won’t be forgiven. Right now, I would stab you for 2 dollars” She exclaimed, pointing at him, very threatically, while her ‘Dad’ started laughing. “Niebla!” He said recognizing the speech “It sounds so weird in english. What the hell happened to you?” She smiled slightly relieved, but she has to take a little control of the situation. “Oh yeah, I got an haircut. But alright. Ehm. Guys, this is... what’s your name right now, ‘Dad’?” “Pedro” “This is my ‘dad’” She said doing the quotation marks ”Pedro and... ‘Dad’, those are my... classmates Techy and Nine.” She looke at Elliott and Tina. “I recommend you not saying your names or revealing any kind of personal information” She whispered with a smile. "And I don't know who that is" she said pointing at the kid.

Elliott couldn't stop looking at Santana's "dad" , he felt such a strong feeling of distrust coming from him that he wasn't even sure if he could let his guard down from now on, he assimilated what Santana was just whispering to them and nodded "Yes, I'm Nine... nice to meet you" he said, though it kinda sounded like a question.

Tina the unease in the air was starting to thicken. She looks at the exchange between Santana and her 'father' trying to see the emotions that lingered between them yet something felt off about it. "Yep , I'm Techy," she said with slight warmth in her voice glad to be called Techy witch again.

The man in the sunglasses laugh at that ‘nice to meet you’. He pointed at the kid. “This is my new kid. I found him in the trash and adopted him. He is so fucking annoying” He said with a smile full of pride. “Kiddo, entertaint those two while me and your ‘sister’ have a talk” he said and pointed to be just 3 meters separated from the rest.

Santana looked the kid with hate “No” She just said, visibly bothered by the whole thing and with too many things to say that she didn’t even knew were to start. “One moment” She excused herself to Elliott and Tina. “I’ll take care of this. Sorry” She said and followed the man. Inmediatly they started to argue in spanish. Like they were whispering really loud it was basically just normal talking. Anyone who knew the language would just hear the whole thing.

Someone smiled and winked. “Surprise, onee-chan! Told you you were going to be amaze~” they were really happy again, and couldn’t stand still. “Professional Hugger is called Elliott and is a satanist, and Silent Cry for Help is Tina Cohen-Chang and she’s into New-age electronic music” they informed. “And we are gonna be super friends!” They were more than happy to be a distraction. “So so, Hugger, I suspect my last messages didn’t arrive, but the other satanists in the farm are fine! And Silent Cry, I can give you my url if you really want to!” They got a notebook and a pen from their backpack. “Do y’all want me to draw for you? I’m going to draw for you.” They said pretty determinated and with bright wishful eyes.

Elliott was very conflicted part of him wanted to be with Santana and somehow help her out, but it seemed like actually a family thing that Santana and her "dad" had to deal with, and either way the kid seemed suspicious as well, so he didn't want to let them out of his side. It was kind of cute, almost like they were for real a innocent child, and he was starting to feel bad for talking to them aggresively "Er... sure" he said knowing pretty well those Shedim were more than dead, but at the same time, how do you break those news to a kid? "Ugh, right right, let's draw something" he also took out a pen and a notebook from his own bag and tried to do a funny drawing for the kid. Maybe sort of playing with them would keep them away from doing mischiveous things.

Tina could not help but worry about Santana as she spoke to her "dad" privately as they started to talk in Spanish, frowning a little that she never took high school Spanish. The little kid was trying to out Tina and Elliott but messed up quiet a lot. "Sure...I'm an electronic music specialist," which she could easily do with her magic. She watches as Elliott and the kid started drawing, which wasn't something for her, she just watches them. "Sure, it would be nice to have your URL." she smiles, a chance to know,"But if you don't mind me ask, because you seem a little young, but are you over 13, since you have to be 13 to use Tumblr, don't you?"

Someone was glad everything was coming along just fine. They knew it. Everyone just ended up loving them in the end. “What do you want? Your fursona,ponysona, centaursona, zootopiasona, prettyderbysona or villagersona?” They asked very fast and very thrilled to show their art skills. “I’ll write it in your drawing, Silent Cry, just tell me what you want! You know I wanna be just like you. Just like you before you decided to ruin yourself, of course, but who am I to judge?” They frowed at Tina’s question. “I’m an adult in horse years” They said very convinced as if that was an answer. “I am just very short for my height! And now that we are talking about it, I wasn’t found in the trash we met /next/ to a trash can in the streets it’s totally different!”

Santana and her ‘dad’ keep arguing for a while, she started to talk more, as she was explaining something. The man put his hand in his mouth trying not to laugh. Santana looks unamused.

Elliott looked at the kid confused, he didn't know what half of those things they say meant but he randomly picked one "Zootopiasona?" he said a little scared of what he picked "Is that like... zoo... like an animal version of me?" he frowned confused. He wasn't sure if the kid wasn't for real or if his life was as fucked up as to be living near a trash can, but he was starting to wonder if that how things worked with Santana's dad. Sort of taking advantage of weak kids in need that he found and training them to do what he wanted. Gross. "What do you want me to draw for you?" he asked.

Tina was trying to keep up with all the sona style drawings that the kid wanted to do. So he was that side of Tumblr. "A sona is like persona, if you were in the world Senpai. Like Zootopia, the disney movie!" She explains to Elliott before her attention draws back to the backpack kid. "Hey what the spell do you mean 'before I decided to ruin myself' mean?" Feeling all the offence to that statement, though it was meant to be flattering this person knew how to make it sound unflattering by all means. "Yeah...that didn't answer my question."

Someone answered Elliott “Neight, is not that simple” with determination while starting to draw, and Tina explained it in their place while they nodded. “Draw me Seiun Sky” they said all happy, expecting everyone to know what they meant. “You know what I mean! Giving up what you love the most... to be something you aren’t supposed to be. We are very alike! Just that I’m still working on improving, and you instead decided to completelly ruin yourself when you were perfect as you were. But if you are happy with that...” They said with a shrug, still smiling. “I’m grow up enough!”

Santana keeps looking annoyed, and the man starts laughing without shame. After a while she starts laughing a little too.

Elliott looked at the kids confused as hell, he also couldn't understand what they knew or didn't about Tina or what they were trying to imply, but the more he thought about it the more he saw the kid as just that an annoying kid to set them apart from Santana "I don't know what or who that is" he replied looking over them to where Santana and her dad were talking or laughing or discussing, he wasn't sure what was happening at all "What do you mean she ruined herself?" he got offended too since they were insulting one of his dearest friends "Tina is amazing"

Tina can feel her confidence starting to slip. Her mouth feeling a little dryer as someone was calling her out about being who she is not suppose to be. Did they meant her being a New Age? Or something about her parents? What did this person even mean? She wants to ask but she is too afraid to know a truth, Santana and Kurt gave her too much of that (for the better or worst). When she hears Elliott, his words reminder that she is awesome. "Guess you know me from what you seem online," she lightly shrugs it off,"I am happier." She looks over at Santana and her 'father' wondering if this laughing was something she was happy about.

Someone wasn’t dissapointed Seiun Sky wasn’t know, because it means they could introduce her to people, so they just took their phone and opened a folder with thousand screenshots from anime, and showed Elliott a white haired anime girl with animal ears and tail. “This is Seiun Sky, from Uma Musume Pretty Derby. It’s a sport anime that is ALSO an idol anime, with horse girls” They keep showing Elliott screenshots of the show while talking really intenselly about it “You should totally check it out if you have any taste for good things. Look they live with normal people and they have special clothes they can wear with their tails and all, it's really nice...” They could had talked hours about that show, but stopped to laugh at Elliott response about the comment on Tina. “Hihihi, is that natural loyalty or she ordered you to defend her? I can’t say what I mean here, you should know that” They explained like a know-it-all. They listened to Tina’s answer and smiled. “If you are happy that’s what matters, isn’t it?” they just said and keep drawing.

Santana and her ‘dad’ stopped laughing, and apparently he was explaining her something, while she listened, crossing her arms, pretty serious while nodding, and sometimes doing a small comment. After a long time, progressively even that started to sound like a heated discussion. “You know what?” Her ‘dad’ said. “Let’s put an end to this argument. Now. Kiddo!” He called and both walked to the group. “Be preparing to get going. And you, Nine, or whatever your name is” he said pointing at Elliott, and asking, very seriously “Can satanists shoots rays trought their eyes or not?”. Santana muttered annoyed “No they fucking don’t y ni siquiera estabamos hablando de eso! ”

Elliott was horrified at the level of fetishization those poor horse girls were going through, and he was also so confused as to why that show was in any way good quality content "Erm..." he looked down at his notebook and decided he wasn't going to draw that at all, he was also getting angrier at the moment when the kid said he could be controlled by Tina "you know what" he closed the notebook "i dont even know why should i pretend or care for anything you got to say..." he was going to say more when Santana and her dad approached "No, we can't" he replied almost at the same time as Santana.

Tina "doesn't give a flying flip about the crappy anime that this kid was trying to talk about. As her fists balled to the side to what he was insinuating that Tina was doing to Elliott,"How dare you even think that. I would never do that. Not to anyone," she spoke through gritted teeth. She was just was done as Santana and Elliott were. She wanted to go away from that child.

Someone complained “Eeeeeh, but we are friends! Why are y’all suddenly so mean? I feel sad now!” but they were told to prepare to go, so they ripped the page of their drawing and gave it to Elliott anyway. “I know Zootopia doesn’t have horses but I don’t know how to draw other animals” They informed offering the drawing with a pride that only a teen with a Sonic OC on devianart could have. It was really bad, but it was a cartoon horse with Elliott’s clothes. It had written ‘With love from Oliver’

Santana could note everyone was very unconfortable and hated every second of it. It wasn’t enough to encounter her ‘dad’ with all that it means, it had to be with Elliott and Tina. A wave of shame suddenly hit her and she crossed her arms again. Now to see what bullshit will he come up with now. “Told you” she said, but he smiled like it was just the answer he wanted to hear. Of course. She rolled her eyes and he started to talk “That’s perfect, because now that you all know that’s bullshit I can finally tell you the tale of that time I met the Unkneeling”

Elliott took the drawing anyway even though he was so confused, if he had to choose an animal to draw himself as, he would choose a sheep with really cool horns. He saved the drawing on his own notebook noticing the name, but he wasn't done processing that when he heard Santana dad's words "What did you say?" he asked surprised.

Tina , herself was feeling wound up the the child but they matter litter and their love for Zootopia. Aether they drew Ell as a horse. No not important. She places a hand on his shoulder, making sure that he was alright as Santana's father was talking about him or too him.

The man with the sunglasses started monologing a story that sounded like had been told more than once. ”It was just the Unkneeling, the one who brought her to the world also know as the Author, me, and more than a dozen of mercenaries about to corner us and kill us. The two of them started to argue about what to do, and the Unkneeling ended it up with a ‘I’m going to do whatever I please anyway’ while the other asked her to not do it, something aobut not wanting whatever shit to happend again.” He said like it wasn’t important. “Anyway, the Unkneeling get rid of her make up if you know what I mean, daringly stept up against the mercenaries. They weren’t impressed, and the leader ordered her to get on her knees with the confidence of a man who had done that a thousand times and was always obeyed. She keep standing tall. And she asked him to repeat the order, that she must not hear it clearly. So he did...” He keep saying, still unfinished, but doing a dramatic pause to breathe.

Santana knew a lot of her ‘dad’ stories, and almost all of them started with people trying to murder him. She wondered if this one has some truth in it, but if it was a fucking joke she was ready to punch him in the face.

Elliott was very confused, was that man really trying to say that he knew a Shedim who wouldn't kneel? That sounded to good to be true, especially coming from someone who would lie. "So she didn't kneel?" he asked surprised anyway, even if he thought it could be a lie, he may also be hopeful.

Tina didn't know whether or not to trust the things Santana's 'dad' was saying, not because he was a trickster (okay maybe a little bit) but from the way Santana always seemed to talk about his family. She listens but her eyes watch Elliott, slightly worried if this was lie filled with false hope.

The man with the sunglasses checked for a second his public reaction’s, and answered to the most interested one. “She didn’t, she mocked him for failing and invited the others to try instead. She was pretty encouraging, saying ‘C’mon, put some more efford into it! Said it louder’. She even made the gesture of starting to, and then got back up again while cackling. Their faces were priceless” He narrated laughing at the tale. “After that she said ‘I’m going to count to 10 so you better start running’ and at 7 there were no mercenaries left. It was increible” He keeps laughing for a while. “She also shoot lasers through her eyes. Anyway, the mercenaries were gone, the Author was freaking out and I said ‘It looks like you need of my services so this keeps being a secret and you two get out of this situation’ and the Author said ‘You put us in this situation’” He said, using a high pitched mocking voice for the Author’s voice. “You know how women always complain about that... I took care of it. The Author said ‘you can’t tell people about this” And I said ‘ehhhhh I’m going to’, because, it is too good of a story to not tell, it was amazing. She said ‘What is the point of covering it if you are going to tell it anyway? Please just don’t say it, please’ so I started to explain what was the point and the many nuances of the circunstances. The Unkneeling interrupted me to say ‘If you are going to be a dick anyway, can you at least add some absurd detail like... I don’t know, that I shoot lasers through my eyes or something like that so it all sounds even more improbable and people won’t believe you?’ And I said ‘Now that I can do’”

Santana was bitchy smiling outside but screaming inside and the little kid was just looking at her ‘dad’ very confused about the whole thing.

Elliott was starting to believe maybe the story was right, but at the same time the more he heard it looked more like a lie "Well... that's something..." he wasn't sure if he should have more hope or not but he didn't lose anything trying to ask "Is there any way of finding her? I have a lot of questions about... satanists" he asks.

Tina tries to keep up with Santana's "father's" story but she felt confused as anything, though she kept a stern face on looking between Elliott and Santana for their reactions. Though the fact that he spoke about the Unkneeling, was something like that even possible? There had to be, anything was possible.

The man with the sunglasses contained a laugh "Someone is really desperate...but sure, I do have the email of the Author, she surely knows." He said gesturing to the kid so they give him the notebook to write it. "But she lives in a zone... just like this one." He said pointing around"And she will probably say she doesn't know what you are talking about if you ask her directly...and, why would I give this to you for free?" He asked when he finished writing it and folded the paper showing it in his hand.

Santana get close to Elliott. "We don't want it, right?" She said and tried to gesticulate to her friend how this was not really a good idea. "You can like, go away now." She said to her fake dad, feeling bad about it but also feeling bad about the current situation.

Elliott looks at Santana then at her dad, he knows he should agree with Santana, he probably didn't have good intentions, but It was something he couldnt just let go of it "Because your hija's friend are your friends?" he tries really hard knowing he is probably saying that word in the worst pronunciation possible.

Tina adds in her two sense,"Tana's is normally right about these kinda things. You shouldn't want it." For once she was actually taking Santana's side and affirming it out loud.

The man with the sunglasses laughs even more with that answer and hands him the paper. "I'm convinced. That's her work email for her books. She knows english" He just said, and looked directly at Tina “Why shouldn’t he want it?” Asked, and waited for an answer before warning the the kid. "We have other things to o now, so we’re leaving now. Bye, Niebla. Good luck all that and try not to die" He says giving her half a hug half a pat in the back and ready to go, while the kid waved at them goodbye.

Santana didn’t return the hug but also feel it was too short. “Same to you!” she said and felt the mood improving considerably with two tricksters less on the mix, but still too many mix of feelings to be any calm, she looked at Elliott and Tina after a while and fake laugh. “Well. That was something. Let’s just forget about all this and not talk about it and Elliott I highly recommend you to throw that paper to the trash”

Elliott looked down at the paper, Santana may be right, it could be something weird, someone trying to trick him, the email could lead to trouble, but it also could lead to answers. "Yeah, maybe I should, when we find one" he says putting the paper on his pocket pretty sure he is not going to throw it away.

Tina doesn't say a work to him, she didn't have just too. She just stays silent watching as her father and the kid said their goodbyes and were ready to leave. "We'll try," she says to Santana but it was not easy to forget something like this. "Senpai, if you do email, let me know please." She tells him, already writing magic codes she could embed in the message if something fishy were to happen.

Santana fucking knows he is not going to throw the fucking paper but she'll try to convince him later. She wanted to go away anyway, maybe she could find another witch that didn't talk much around. "I forgot something at the hotel, I see you guys later, alright?"

#ellnaturae #cohentoplaywithmagic #para: tina #para: elliott #chara: tina #chara: elliott

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