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you-turn-it-into-light · 2 years

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H-el-ical// - Kaihouku (解放区) (2022) Album Review

Sorry I’m a bit late to the party, I was busy and waiting for the physical album to arrive. I’ve given it one listen so my thoughts might not be super coherent but I’ll also give some updated thoughts on the songs that reappear in the track list.

Overall Thoughts:

The promo image made me think that we’d see a larger picture of Hikaru, there’d be more of that paint and we’d see the full outfit, so I’m a little disappointed with the cover art especially the regular edition.

No extra booklet coming with the limited edition is disappointing as well

While I enjoy that Hikaru branched out with composers more, I wish she kept writing more of the lyrics. I like it when artists write their own lyrics because it feels more like their song and Hikaru’s lyrics added a lot of character and a feeling of connection with her through the songs. I hope she doesn’t go down the route of continuing to only let people write lyrics for her songs.

I’m a bit let down by the new songs, I only love one of them lol.

I like the new route she’s taking, most of these songs sound different that stuff she’s done before and it’s a nice break from the samey stuff from her last few mini albums. Even though I’m sad there weren’t more dark or epic songs in this album, it’s really just my personal preference.

Altern-ate- (7/10)

This song is interesting in some ways, I really like the verses and the bridge especially. The arrangement is quite epic and I love the choir in the beginning and the strings section near the end. I like how the lyrics incorporate both lines from within the anime with 「二人で一つ」(the two of us become one) and 「この物語の集約じゃない」(I am not the protagonist of this story) as well as the actual Gleipnir norse mythology. Hikaru really did but a lot of effort into these lyrics and they’re so interesting. The main strings riff however is a little boring and the chorus is also quite bland. There are also a couple of moments in the studio recording that I go ‘okay Hikaru you didn’t want to do a second take?’ like the ‘nazo wa tokenai mama’ and parts where she was obviously straining her voice but at this point I expect this is every Hikaru song.

Rasen no Mayu (螺旋の繭) (6.5/10)

I don’t mind this song, it sends like a very generic pop-rock song. I like Hikaru’s low notes in the verses and the chorus is growing on me with each listen to be honest. The subtle additions of two harmonies is a nice touch but the chorus is honestly my favourite part. The instrumentation and arrangement is honestly kind of generic and forgettable, nothing much to say about it. I like the song fine but it’s probably the most forgettable out of all the new songs.

The Sacred Torch (4/10)

This song is just kind of... okay? I don’t mind the verses and I like the urgency of the the pre-choruses but the chorus is boring and bland. The flavour of this song isn’t really my thing and it’s definitely my least favourite A-Side in all of H-el-ical//’s single’s thus far. The final 「灯かかげ」 sounds cool but Hikaru sounds very strained in that part as well. Also why do the strings sound midi? Can they not afford actual strings?

Ambient Border (6/10)

Are those midi strings again? Ugh. I love dramatic songs in musicals and this definitely gives me that vibe. The verses are boring but I like the chorus and especially the bridge (mostly the line ノイズと残響酸性雨の中で錆び付いた) it’s very dramatic and feels like it could be in the climax of a story. Similar to Rasen no Mayu, the instrumentation and arrangement is nothing to write home about and neither is the song really. I feel like I’ll enjoy it more if I hear it in the context of the musical.

YES NO (イエスノウ) (8/10)

This song is so 80′s it’s so great. The combination of electronic sounds and the guitar phrases are very funky and I love the sound. The chorus is great but the bridge is so sexy, definitely my favourite part. Hikaru’s low notes in time with the bass and cowbell in the background and then the guitar comes back in? Sounds great. The piano solo was also great. This is a great song to dance to and it’s one of the sexiest things Hikaru’s ever sung. I have this song’s rating as an 8 because while there are lots of things I like about this song, I don’t think there’s there’s anything I LOVE about it.

Kanashii Kedamono (カナシイケダモノ) (9/10)

My favourite song in the album. The guitar riff and chill vibe caught me immediately then Hikaru’s singing in the pre-chorus successfully got me in. It sounds similar to YES NO but I feel like it’s more dramatic. The bridge though??? The melody is so good, and the arrangement and instrumentation of the lines 「震えるまま　ありのままの」 is so dramatic I love it. The arrangement isn’t anything super interesting, but I like the guitar in the verses and the horns in the chorus, none of it sounds midi so I love it. The last chorus is especially great. Definitely my favourite.

Kawaisou da yo (かわいそうだよ) (7/10)

Hikaru’s singing in this song is mostly great, she conveys a lot of emotion in the lyrics, especially the line 「I hate youでも逢いたくて」sounds very raw. The breathy way she sings in most of the song makes the final chorus with its key change more impactful in my opinion. The arrangement is nothing to write home but I like the sound of the shirt it was very nice. The lyrics are nice as well, they’re more raw than anything else Hikaru’s sung and it’s a nice change. I really wanted to love this song but it just reminds me of too many other generic J-Pop ballads (in my opinion) that I can’t fall in love with it. It’s one of those songs that I only like because Hikaru’s singing it I guess.

disclose (8/10)

I remember I fell in love with this song the first time I heard this song, it was what I always wanted in a Hikaru solo song and it’s still really great. The arrangement is interesting and dramatic, I love how Gushimiyagi contrasts the arrangements between the verses. The instrumentation in this song is heavy and impactful and the addition of sound effects and occasional midi choir in the background really adds to the effect. Hikaru’s singing is very strained in the chorus but I think it adds to the desperate feeling the song is going for. Similar to other songs Gushimiyagi has composed, the chorus is my least favourite part. Repeating the same two notes over and over again isn’t really interesting to me. But overall, love this song.

clea-rly- (7.5/10)

I still love the heavy rock feeling of this song, it suits Hikaru very well. I love the arrangement of this song it’s so cool and the added electronic elements add rather than detract from the arrangement. Again though, the verses and pre-chorus are the best parts (except for the bridge cause the way Hikaru sings 「感覚を味わいたくない？」is soooo sexy) and the chorus is just boring because it’s just the same phrase over and over again like STOP. I like the idea of Altern-ate-’s single songs being from the perspectives of the main protagonist even though I hated the show. Anyway, This song is a lot of fun and I really like it, even if it can sound a bit basic.

JUST DO IT (4/10)

I actually like the chorus the best in this song, it sounds more dramatic and less cheesy than the rest of the song (even if it’s a bit repetitive). I guess I’m against the very premise of this song because I’ve heard what the anime’s about and it’s so stupid lmao. The rest of the song isn’t really my cup of tea, the technological electronic sounds fit the tone of the show but I don’t really like them. The english parts of the intro and outro are so cheesy I can’t handle them. Overall, IMPOSSIBLE LOVE is better go listen to that.

landscape (5.5/10)

I like the verses of the song, the guitar phrases are really calming and give a very atmosphere to the song, the strings in the second verse are also lovely. I don’t mind the electronic elements of the song but the chorus isn’t really my thing. I like how experimental and layered this song is, but it’s interesting but also boring at the same time. If they entire song was like the verses I would probably like the song them a lot more.

pulsation (English ver.) (5/10)

The only real thing to talk about with this version is the lyrics and some of the new arrangement choices I guess. I don’t mind the English lyrics, but the way Hikaru chose to space the syllables in the line of ‘The sky is so blue’ always bothers me, like why did you decide to speed ‘the sky’ together then extend ‘sky’ when you could just sing ‘the sky is’ evenly, like it fits... Also the way ‘anymore now’ is extended is so strange and kind of interrupts the flow of the song in my opinion. The arrangement changes are interesting if a little overwhelming and obnoxious (in the case of the bridge). This version is a nice alternative, but I prefer the original.

Favourite Songs: Kanashii Kedamono, YES NO, disclose

Least Favourite Songs: JUST DO IT, The Sacred Torch, landscape (not including pulsation (English ver.))

#h-el-ical//#kaihouku #album review #review #kalafina #text post #long text post

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willowistic22 · 3 years

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Famous!newsies

Ok so here are my famous!newsies headcanons from an a modern au i thought of if newsies were celebrities/famous yknow bcs I couldn’t get this idea out of my head and idk what to do with it other than making a headcanon list nabsnzbsvsnsbz anyways hope yall validate me after not posting any original content for like…. awhile now hehe

btw it got longer than expected. And I mean r e a l l y long. So if yall wanna read this better sit down and buckle up!

Jack

He’s an artist on youtube

Like a modern day bob ross ig??

If yall know zhc on youtube just imagine that but not so rich (I don’t watch zhc btw but i do know that he does custom art on iphones and stuff and that is definitely not jack kelly)

Anyways Jack simply goes by Jack Kelly.

So jack does art challenges. Like does the weirdest requests from his fans left in his comment section and stuff

Or maybe challenging himself to make art from a specific theme or a specific media

Sometimes he vlogs too but his art videos are what his fans like the most

His merch is amazing because he designed the pattern/drawing/whatever yknow. It’s printed/sewed/whatever on the clothing and it’s good quality. It’s pretty lowkey for a youtuber’s merch bcs jack doesn’t like those merch that just smacks his logo on a hoodie

Davey

He’s a fantasy, YA, romance writer (he mixes it wisely ok?)

And goes by David Jacobs

Listen he’s a hopeless romantic and i’m pretty sure yall agree too

He wanted to stick to YA romance. The classic high school lovers yknow

But he wanted to challenge himself since he’s been writing about high school lovers since he was in high school

Thus the fantasy genre came in mind

So yeah he likes creating love in his own universe

Whether it’d be different worlds, universe, species, time periods, whatever.

He wanted to direct the movies based on his books, but he’s actually lowkey terrible at leading on his own. But he did stick to being the script writer and co-director (look idk how it works in the film industry i’m just making shit up)

Crutchie

He’s a solo jazz singer

Crutchie gives off Michael Buble and Jason Mraz vibes tho

And maybe a bit of frank sinatra? Yknow ‘cause he sings jazz

Also he riffs thank you very much :)

He goes by Crutchie Morris to everyone

He usually plays the acoustic guitar or piano on stage

Ok but he’s like really good with the piano

Makes the best jokes on stage too. Some are just sarcastic comments.

Crutchie asking through the microphone : “Oh, straight?”

A fan he’s talking to from the crowd : “Uhh… no, gay”

Crutchie : “no not you, the vodka”

Everyone at the concert : *laughs*

Crutchie, jokingly : “Oh, you’re drinking vodka! Straight? No gay”

(yes that was indeed inspired by that one video of Harry Styles and a fan in one of his concerts yall can’t stop me)

Kathrine

She’s a crime mystery writer

Think like the modern day Agatha Christie

Okok but she goes by Kathrine Plumber on her books :D

She chooses that genre bcs she’s a huge fan of Agatha Christie

Her favorite book from Agatha is Murder on the Orient Express

Oh and her books are sometime very gruesome alkjsfhakjsfb

Nobody check her browsing history, she’ll look like a murderer

Ok but I feel like she also has a youtube channel about books and stuff and sometimes like to vlog

She also has a writing tips series on her channel where she shares tips on some of the frequently asked questions about writing or her fans leave a specific question in the comment section and thought she could expand more to it in a full length video

Also she likes to vlog while she’s in a book convention

Her books are also turned into movies and she has done a great job directing it

Race

Yall would be lying to me if you don’t think this kid would end up being a twitch streamer and youtuber (like vlogging yknow. I feel like his gaming stuff would strictly be on twitch)

And ik it’s widely agreed by everyone in the fandom that he’s a dancer of some sort so yeah he’s also simultaneously a dancer

I don’t think I need to explain any further bcs it’s just so in character

He goes by Racetrack Higgins

Ok so he likes to vlog on his youtube channel

Sometimes does stupid challenges

Maybe he’d drag Albert to do a challenge which he always says no

“I’ll just be your cameraman dude, dw”

Race : *angery*

Since Al and Smalls are the skateboard peeps™ race is the rollerblade dude™ bcs I say so

He has three cats named Racecat Higgins, Spot Clawlon, and Romeow (i’ve mentioned it before and I will mention it again hehe) and his fans loves them endlessly

Albert

You don’t think this kid would also end up being a twitch streamer and youtuber like his bestie up there?? Lmao you thought wrong (again, gaming is strictly on his twitch)

He just goes by Albert DaSilva on the internet

And yes he’s also a dancer because I say so

On his Youtube channel he also vlogs

Half of his vlogs starts with him riding his skateboard

“Hey, guys! Welcome back to another vlog-” *falls off his skateboard for not paying attention to a curb*

It happens way more often than he’d like to admit let’s be real. His fans make a compilation of it and memes on reddit

Always wear a snapback

Snapbacks are an important element to him so his merch store is really boosting his snapbacks

And just for the wormsie discord server he has one with the word ranga on it after it being born from a stupid inside joke he, race, and both of their fanbases combined share (@ my wormsie fam thank me later)

Oh yeah, his youtube besties are Race and Smalls just so we’re clear here :) (I’ll get to Smalls in a bit)

So I always headcanon Albert having two big dobermans. So his fans always want to see a doggy update because Zara and Zoey are everything to them.

Doggo vlogs are fun. It’s usually Albert taking the two good girls to Central Park for playtime or teaching them new tricks

Spot

He’s a solo rock singer

Is an amazing singer like wow none of the newsies expected him to have that sort of pipes to reach high notes

And he does it amazingly with no sweat

Also his instrument is the electric guitar to go with his amazing singing ajsfhasjfhajhf

Anyways he goes by Spot Conlon still

And his songs are very lyrical. Like very.

A lot of metaphors. No one knows what most of his songs means.

So basically Taylor Swift songs if it switched genres to rock. And not even like songs from speak now or red. But like if evermore and folklore songs were to turn into rock songs with a little bit of reputation vibes sprinkled on top. And his concerts has the reputation era vibes but make it spot conlon (hey non swiftie fans reading this i’m so sorry i’m pretty sure yall don’t understand wtf i’m talking abt)

That is also the only way i know to describe his vibe i’m sorry but i don’t really listen to a lot of rock alkjhfasjk

Anyways it’s a known fact that he wears tank tops daily that it becomes his signature look. And also an inside joke among his fanbase

Now just picture the merch booth from one of his shows and there’s like endless tank top designs for his fans to pick and choose

He’s also crowned to be the King of Brooklyn bcs of obvious reasons

But the joke is he’s a pretty tough hardcore guy that’s a cat person

Sarah

She’s a badass female solo singer

Mostly does pop but the badass type of pop

Yes, she does go by Sarah Jacobs

Fans were really surprised Davey and Sarah are related

Because one is a hopeless romantic while the other is a total badass

Anyways she gives off Little mix, Ariana Grande, Taylor Swift, and Selena Gomez vibes

That is literally the only way I can describe it

She’s very lyrical, with a lot of metaphors

When she dances on stage, she d a n c e s

All while holding a mic to sing. And she hits all those high notes like it’s no ones business (a literal queen i tell you)

She and Spot are besties and has been known to have done a few collabs together

Their fans were hesitant about their collabs since their genre is pretty different from the other but they make it work and it slAPS

And among all her boppy songs with full choreography and backup singers, she always have a few songs she sings while only being accompanied by piano or guitar (Either electric or acoustic) which she plays on her own

Finch

He’s an indie pop artist with his trusted acoustic guitar by his side

Just think of music by Wallows and Lewis Capaldi were to be blended in together and Conan Gray for the cherry on top

But it has a little bit of Ed sheeran, Lorde, and Lauv vibes to it too

His concerts are simple but his songs are mostly very boppy so his fans still have fun either way

And it’s usually in small venues but there are times where he had a concert in a huge stadium

He goes by FINCH (yeah all caps btw)

Finches are a very on brand thing for him obviously

Has been known to collab with Crutchie and they actually make a very good team

Somehow was able to combined both genres to produce a few boppy songs

Ok ok but Finch and Crutchie have made a collaborative album (and maybe they went on tour????)

Specs

He’s a history fiction writer

Yes this is inspired by the fact that he’s 100% a history nerd (no one change my mind i love this headcanon aight)

And he explores a lot of different histories from different parts of the world

He actually helps a lot of students understand history even further for school through his novels

Anyways he goes by Specs because I say so

No one knows why that’s his pseudonym and Specs isn’t interested in explaining either. No one other than the newsies need to know it was born from a stupid nickname the newsies gave him :)

His research mostly comes from history books because of his genre which wouldn’t be a problem since he has loads and will voluntarily buy more if needed

Also yeah he makes a great director for the movies taken from his books

Mush

He’s a chef on youtube

Goes by Mush Meyers

So think if Gordon Ramsey and his youtube channel but make it mush

Yeah that’s it really

Ok but Mush is a jolly and friendly person

Other than just food vlogging he does cooking challenges and cooking tips too

Sometimes he does the cooking challenges with a friend (mostly henry but i’ll get to him later on in the list)

But he also vlogs his life

Which isn’t really often but he likes to sometimes

He’s that big of a foodie he has a food blog too

And also a seafood restaurant so that’s cool :D

Henry

Like Mush, he’s a chef on youtube

Goes by Henry on the internet and in general

Ajkfhajfjska I’m thinking about how ppl would address him as Chef Henry kajhfkjlashfjklasfjklsf

He mostly does the same thing like Mush actually

Food vlogging and cooking challenges (they do it together so) sometimes cooking tips

But Henry vlogs his life a lot

And instead of a food instagram he has a food blog

He has a sandwich restaurant

Yeah it is inspired by his pastrami on rye with a sour pickle line from KONY get mad about it why don’t ya (well if i’m not mistaken henry was the one that said it but idk i have horrible memory)

Blink

He’s a youtuber

Ok so I have a specific headcanon that Blink majored in psychology but didn’t end up being a psychologist

So instead he becomes a psychologist on youtube

Who often vlogs jhgasjlfhs

The guy looks like he could cut you but his sense of humor once you get him talking is just *chef’s kiss* amazing

Which is why he also has a podcast because he’s also secretly great at talking

He just thinks mental health is very important, okay?

Romeo

He’s an actor

Mostly on Broadway but has worked with Hollywood before

He’s usually a supporting character but has been known to understudy for main characters

Ok ik these bullet points are getting shorter and shorter but these are mostly bcs some of these stuff are pretty self explanatory since it’s very in character

Like are you telling me a kid named Romeo isn’t gonna be in some way very dramatic and end up turning that personality trait into his career?? Plus he’s very good at that?

Yeah you’re lying to me

Also he’s a pretty frequent vlogger on youtube

Look he’s a fun guy, what did you expect?

Just goes by Romeo on youtube

Elmer

He’s an actor

Has done his fair share in Broadway and Hollywood but started in Broadway

He can dance but thinks he’s pretty average in it yknow

Which his fans has no idea what he’s talking about because on stage he can do flips and turns like it’s no ones business yknow

But he can sing really good and takes pride in it

Elmer would play characters that is really far off from his own personality that fans couldn’t believe that Elmer played that character

He has done his fair share in main characters and supporting characters on Broadway

In Hollywood he usually does indie and rom-com movies

Buttons

He’s a fashion youtuber and basically an influencer

Let’s be real this boy is a fashion icon

He’s not really a model but more like a fashion influencer and also kind of a fashion designer

His clothing line is very *chefs kiss* amazing

He designed it all and sometimes likes to design for his friends as well

He also does fashion tips on his youtube channel

His instagram game is god tier level (along with Tommy Boy and Sniper I’ll get to them in a bit)

But yeah he also vlogs

And goes by Buttons Davenport

Jojo

He’s an actor

Mostly on Broadway but has done a few movies in Hollywood

He radiates main character energy and he does become the main character most of the time (on hollywood at least)

On Broadway he mostly enjoys being apart of the ensemble because this boy loves dancing

But he does play a few supporting characters

He has released one or two albums too because his singing is top tier

But isn’t interested in doing a lot of live concerts with his albums

Since no one has the time to say Josephino Jorgelino De La Guerra he turned it into Jojo De La Guerra (so much for ‘a special nickname only for friends and family’)

Mike and Ike

They’re a pop boy band and bcs of my lack of creativity it’s called Mike and Ike

At the start of their career :

“My name goes first because I’m older than you!” - Mike

“You’re only older than me by 13 minutes, holy shit!” - Ike

But Ike slowly accepts the fact that it’ll be like this yknow

Anyways they’re pretty great singers

They have one direction and new hope club vibes

Tho unlike one direction they can dance (i love the boys alright but i really think it’s funny that they can’t dancelkhjjlh)

They like to switch from the guitar (electric and/or acoustic) to the piano

The amount of times their name is confused by the candy is too many

But they like it like that lol

Anyways i’ve mentioned a headcanon where Mike has tattoos (not like from head to toe but it’s fairly noticeable to everyone) and Ike has piercings

So the only way their fans tell them apart is by that

But there are times where Mike has his tattoos covered or Ike took his piercings off in public alone. A fan mistakens them for the other twin but they still respond to the other name because they don’t feel like there’s a need to correct them since they’re mostly known by Mike and Ike anyways. When the fan posts it on instagram and tags the twin they thought it was the twin that was tagged would comment “wrong twin but nice pic you two”

Happens wayyyyy too many times. Their fans are officially scared to approach one of the two in public alone without their differentiating indicators on which is which

And yes it is widely known that they argue a lot when it comes to writing songs

Nothing out of the ordinary sibling squabble yknow but it’s a lot

But they do end up finding a solution to the topic of their argument and make a good team at the end of the day

Hotshot

He’s an actor

On Broadway, he’s one of those actor’s that is mostly good in just the acting and singing

He can’t dance to save his life sjdfghaf

So Jeremy Jordan yknow asj;oghajshf

No not really. He can dance a little bit

So he’s mostly the main character

But he’s widely known for his works in Hollywood

He does a lot of drama. Think stuff like Elite and Designated Survivor. Yeah those kinds of heavy drama (well idk i think those two are pretty heavy)

He wants to release his own music because he’s a pretty good singer but he can’t write songs to save his life either jgnjafjasf

And all the demo songs he was suggested by producers isn’t his cup of tea

So he’s no singer ladies and gents ://

The name Hotshot is used to name his social media platforms. He always adds a description in his bio’s that Hotshot is a nickname his friends and family use so his fans and the media refer to him with his name

I headcanon Hotshot’s real name is Tyler or some sort. No don’t ask me what’s his last name is because idk either lol

Sniper

She’s a model, beauty and fashion youtuber (I’m pretty sure those are two different things tho idk i don’t watch youtube religiously anymore), and just an influencer in general

Instagram game on p o i n t

I know most beauty youtubers go by their names but uhh… i don’t think i’ve ever thought of a first name for Sniper but I really think she really would just go by Sniper Wah on the internet (Idk she seems like an Ashley in my head but feel free to recommend headcanon names to me)

Anyways she’s very fashionable

Tommy Boy (i’ll get to him just wait aight?) and Buttons are her fashion besties

The three of them pretty much appear in each other’s Youtube video not Tommy’s tho bcs he doesn’t have one lol

Sniper’s brand are huge sun hats

I have no idea how or why but that girl has sun hats vibes I can’t explain any further I’m sorry

Doesn’t have a clothing line but does have a make up brand of her own. She calls it Sniper. Yeah that’s it akjfhjf

Smalls

She’s a twitch streamer and youtuber like race and albert

They’re a youtube trio everyone loves it

And yes she does go by Smalls

Oh and she also dances like her two stupid besties thanks for asking

Bubblegum is her brand (idk how to explain she just has the vibe)

She is skateboard chick

I’m imagining a video collab of her and Al on a skatepark doing stupid challenges

It’s her most viewed video

Tommy Boy

Ok ok he’s a model, influencer, and dancer

So think a male version of Gigi Hadid that dances

No he doesn’t have a youtube channel but frequently has made an appearance on Buttons’ and Sniper’s videos

Yes his instagram feed is also very amazing

He goes by Tommy Boy

People genuinely thinking ‘Boy’ is actually his last name and kinda think it’s strange but doesn’t complain

Tommy literally didn’t think people would think it was his last name. But they did anyways

Les

Let’s just get straight to the point : he’s a famous tiktoker

And yes, ppl are surprised at the fact that him, Davey, and Sarah are related to each other

To the people that made it through this entire list. Congratulations and thank you for your validation. Have a wonderful evening and stay hydrated

i will write at least one oneshot out of this au i promise!!

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rose-of-pollux · 3 years

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1, 3, 11, 17, 20, 21 and 22? :o)

1. Tell us about your current project(s) – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it? My current project is my in-progress BTTF fic "'Cause I Might Not Make it Back" (which I just posted the next chapter of!). Basically, in the summer of 1986, Marty gets caught up in a case of time-traveling spy intrigue and ends up in 1932 with amnesia and a Bon Jovi tape--and young!Doc finds him. Fun fact: before I went with Bon Jovi, the original outline had him go back to 1932 with a tape that Marty had made to record Queen's Live Aid performance; the chapters were all originally Queen-themed (and it was originally titled "Though You're Many Years Away"). I switched to Bon Jovi after I remembered that Live Aid was summer of '85, not '86, which was when Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet album was released.

The other project I'm planning is a 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo fic called "Sands of Time and Space" (so yeah, bit of BTTF influence in this one); since I don't count the Curse movie as canon to the series timeline (they retconned waaaaaay too many things for it to make any coherent sense), this will be my way of showing how Fred and Velma found out about the shenanigans they missed out on after the rest of the gang visits Velma in Florida to watch the launch of a new Mars probe developed by her supervisor at NASA.

3. What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be bothered to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway) A. MYSTERY. SCENE. ON. A. TRAIN. Like something intriguing a la Orient Express, but I am thwarted either by either by there already being such a scene in canon (MFU, Scooby-Doo), or there isn't enough of a premise for it (Hogan's Heroes, Pokémon). ...At this point, BTTF might be my only chance to pull this off; maybe Doc and Marty end up on the actual Orient Express via time-travel... (and Marty breaks out his "inconspicuous" Secret Agent Man disguise from Part II again while Doc just facepalms in the background).

11. What do you envy in other writers? HOW DO YOU ALL UPDATE YOUR FICS SO QUICKLY???

17. Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations? I honestly don't know if they perceive my work differently than I do--they'd have to tell me themselves. At this point, I don't think I have any surprises--most people know I write about character relationships, with some drama and angst, but always with a happy ending.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?) Most of the fics I write are all meant to be in the same timeline. And I have a lot of references that tie events from other fandoms together; if I listed them all, we'd be here all day, but here's one example-- In my MFU Halloween fic, "The Jack o' the Lantern Affair," I had Victor Marton mention to Napoleon and Illya that he had a "very distant cousin in Tibet" to whom he bore some amount of resemblance to. This was meant to be a throwaway reference to Vincent Van Ghoul, an in-joke since Vincent Price played both roles--at the time, I never imagined I'd be writing 13 Ghosts fic. Now that I am writing 13 Ghosts fic, I have to make it come full circle--Napoleon and Illya will have a cameo in the party scene in "Sands of Time and Space," as Velma's supervisor is also Napoleon's childhood friend, Takeshi (who, in one of my many MFU short affair pieces, I revealed as working for NASA--which I only did at the time because I wanted him to have a space-themed bachelor party so that Napoleon would come home drunk after having one too many drinks that had been dubbed "Supernovas"), and Napoleon and Illya will pull the mother of all double-takes when they see Vincent Van Ghoul at the same party and momentarily mistake him for Victor Marton.

21. What other medium do you think your story would work well as? (film, webcomic, animated series?) Well, I intend for my stories to fit right into canon, so I generally see them in the same medium that they're originally in. Exceptions are whenever there are crossovers/cameos--I wrote a Scooby fic last year that had the 13 Ghosts fam being chased through ruined Hyrule by Calamity Ganon and basically imagined the fam drawn in Breath of the Wild/Age of Calamity-style for this fic, which was a very intriguing image, indeed.

22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them? Yes, I do! For the most part, I like to see it as how far I've progressed since I started posting fic. Obviously, I'm going to think my newer stuff is better (though I also consider some of my older pieces "classics"), but that's only natural.

#my writing style #ask reply

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haknew · 3 years

Text

anon asked: I HAVE SONG RECS :DDD I tried not to do songs that you would have obviously heard before but a lot of the songs here are still popular but I couldn’t help but add them 😭

AHHHH thank you so so so so much for all the recommendations anon ! your taste is absolutely impeccable !!! i think i vibed with a lot of these maybe we are a bit similar ^~^ and no worries about your picks ! i totally support you and your incredible music taste no need to defend yourself :p ! popular songs can still be good ones ! thank you again and i tried ... to ... get through them all i’m so sorry JHGFDJHGDK you’ll see i get through like ... half and then ran out of energy T^T i’ll probably get back to this list some other time when i have free time and update with thoughts ! thank you for sending so many in ! i found so many new songs to add to my playlist heh thank you lovely !

Pop

cherry by rina sawayama - super cute ! i love these kinds of pop songs it’s right up my alley :o !

xs by rina sawayama - her voice is so well suited for this style ! i watched the mv and djkfhskgrjf HHH idk she gives me mitski vibes even tho their music is pretty different, you have peaked my interest i’ll definitely look into more of her stuff :o !

comme de garçons by rina sawayama - the bass line T^T !!! the talk-y (?) parts are so good i got chills, it’s like a rave song low key haha :p ! it’s so good !

Any song by Rina Sawayama 😭 - yes yes i’ll try to look more into her stuff !

Kpop

123 by nct dream - i’m only an honorary guest of ncity but one of my irls ults them ! and dream’s music has always been a bit more my speed :o ! this has more nostalgic kpop vibes to it ! i said this before but i really am more a pop person at heart and this is so good ^~^

Up to you by pretty much and nct dream (HAECHANS PART HHHHH) - oooh are you a haechan stan 0v0 i like jaemin tho i admit my knowledge of dream is limited (my fren ults renjun heh) also yes yes consent is very important kids u.u dskjghkdfj YOU’RE RIGHT THO haechan is a singer he SINGS, i love the vocal harmonies !

Oasis by crush ft zico - those electric keyboard synths (?) amazing ! this song bops u.u

Moon by everglow - !!! i actually have heard this a lot before ^~^ i got so excited when i saw this bc it’s so good ! it’s definitely one of my fav everglow songs too i think i overplayed it a lot when it first came out *v*

Woowoo by dia - i love the ocean wave sounds ! that’s so cool i love how summery it is ! it kind of reminds me of loona too ! ggs are just >>> i love the fun and brighter pop songs so much 🥺

Secret garden by Oh My Girl - i’ve heard a few songs by omg ! and i really like a handful of them, secret garden kinda gives me early gfriend songs vibes too ! it’s so pretty ! i really love when songs utilize strings in their instrumentals too ! it’s a bit slower paced too which is really nice ^~^

Page by got7 - YEEEES okie actually maybe unpopular opinion but spinning top is one of my fav got7 albums ! i used to listen to the whole mini on repeat ! i actually used to ult got7 too for a few months heh ^^ BUT YEEES i love page ! got7 always have bangers love them so much

Nekkoya by produce 48 - AHHHHH ANOTHER SONG I LOVE !!! i’m actually a wizone haha :p so i’ve seen produce 48 ! tho admittedly it probably contributes to my burning h*tred for mn*t and any survival shows ;;;; but i loved the title song so much ! i used to unironically play it on repeat djghskfj

Puzzle moon by gwsn - AHHHH YOUR TASTE !!! i also followed gwsn from debut and puzzle moon is so so so cute ! it’s such a bop too ! they have such fun and catchy songs !

Goblin by sulli - ahhh the xylophone chimes ! they make the song sound a bit haunting before the piano comes in ;;;; it really reflects the mv story so well i think ;;; and sulli’s voice is so beautiful ;;;; it’s got that characteristic background vocal harmonies that sm artists usually do and it’s just really beautiful !

What are you up to by kang daniel - today on can you tell jess is unfortunately a bg stan daniel’s songs have been so good :,)) i stopped following all the wanna ones closely after a while but ! he always surprises me ! his songs are such vibes u.u

Best day ever by yeri and nct dream - the TRUMPETS YEEES it’s so upbeat and fun !!! the cheering is so cute i love it !

Hair in the air by yeri and nct dream - JAEMINNNNN !!!! I LOVE YERI SO MUCH PLEASE ! i love the vocal harmonies between her and the boys 🥺 it’s so cute T^T ! renjun’s a singer HE SINGS

119 by nct dream - ah yes this is ncity brand u.u LOL they always have really filled chorus instrumentals and use a lot of vocals to fill up the space which i think is really cool and something i think immediately screams sm artist :0 ! i think renjun’s voice really sells this for me tho HIS VOICE IS AMAZING him and haechan yeees it’s a banger tho :,)

Save me save you by wjsn - i love wjsn’s music so much ! it sounds so magic and ethereal and totally bops ! their voices are so beautiful too and work together so well and i think this song’s style really suits all the members’ voices so well too !

Loonatic by loona - YEEEEES loona are my ult gg ! and oec is probably my fav unit in terms of music ! i have spent many a day playing their whole discography ! haha :3

Up by izone - MY GIRLS ! yes yes up is so cute ! i love it so much ! the choreo is so cute too ! i love izone please ;;;;

N/s by stray kids - oh boy okie ;;;; i’m like not a good judge of a lot of hip hop / more rap heavy songs ;;;; bc i was classically trained as a singer in choir ;-; so i’m sorry i do not have much to say about this one ;;;; it slaps tho ! i probably wouldn’t listen to it normally if you hadn’t recommended it tho so ! good to listen to smth outside of my normal preferences

Sunshine by straykids - OH very very different from the last skz song KJHGKFJHKD yea this is probably more my speed i’m so sorry LOL T-T it’s so good tho :o ! i don’t listen to a lot of skz bc i figured i wouldn’t be able to vibe with them but this one is so good i really like it ! skz and ateez man i’ve been trying to stan for ages but music is a big part of why i stan /stan/ certain groups more seriously and it’s also why i’m only honorary nctzen lol clearly i have been enlightened (literally *looks at my past ult groups* yeaaaa)

Blueprint by stray kids - YEEES IT’S SO UPBEAT ! i love upbeat and brighter songs (i am consistent like this T-T) it’s got summery tropical vibes to it too ! it’s so cute !

Question by stray kids - another banger yeeeees ! i vibe with the lyrics too u.u love that

Any mixtape by stray kids (but I really love 1 and 4) - oooh i still have a lot to get through so i’ll save these for my own time haha ^^

I’m your girl by khan

Revolution by Alexa

Secret by wjsn

I wanna be by key and soyeon

Handle it by twice

Teenager by got7

Take by jus2 (CANNOT RECOMMEND THIS ENOUGH)

Bump bump by woodz

Stylish by loona - this is one of my fav loona b sides yeeees !!!! love them so much !

Outta my head by somi

Jpop

showersnow by orbit

show off by orbit

crazy love by orbit

any orbit song ngl 😭

poison girl by nanaka suwa

lost umbrella (I like the tsukishima kei version cause it sounds like lee know :DDD)

Notice by moe shop

Kawaki wo ameku (domestic girlfriend opening)

The day by porno graffiti (my hero academia opening 1)

Odd future by uverworld (my hero academia opening 4)

Again by yui (full metal alchemist brotherhood opening 1)

More English music

Luxury by azalea banks (Ive heard she’s said some terrible things tho 😭 WHY DOES IT SLAP)

Hurricane by Bridget Mendler (I miss this song and ready or not too 😭)

Little dark age by mgmt

I got a couple one direction recs bear with me here 💀

Happily, Magic, AM, 18, Tell Me a Lie, Through The Dark, Wolves, Night Changes, Better Than Words

Hip-hop/rnb

Leaked by lil tjay

Pretty little fears by 6lack and j cole

Water by joe gifted

The London by young thug

Bands by shoreline mafia

Swervin by a boogie wit a hoodie

Father stretch my hands pt 1 by Kanye west

More English music (indila is French)

Northern lights by kennie

I am not a robot by marina

Tourner dans le vide by indila

Parle a ta tete by indila

Greek tragedy by the wombats

Viva la vida by Coldplay (SHHHHH DONT ROAST ME)

La da dee by Cody Simpson (SHH IT MAKES ME HAPPY 😭)

Move your body by loving caliber and anders lystell (this ones good to make u feel like an early 2010’s movie protagonist :D)

Mariposa by Peach tree rascals

Sunflower by post Malone and swae lee (like many songs on here it’s popular but I still wanna put it here cause they make me happy 😭)

I got really carried away sorry I hope you haven’t heard too many of these 😭😭 OKAY BYEEE ❤️

#anon #jess.replies #not tbz #jess.text #ask games #shared songs hour #oh god i am so so sorry anon i swear i'll get to all the others on my own time T-T #i just underestimated all the asks i was going to get with recs and i can feel my energy fading #''faded in my last song~~~'''#i know i said i'd get around to all of them but it's nearing two am djgdkjfhg I'M SO SORRY #i'll come back to this list and update it with thoughts if i have time :o !#so what have we learned today kids ... jess does not have taste whatsoever #also also that ggs >>>>>>#i'm sorry to all my stay friends <///3 truly i have no taste u.u

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lightwoodsmagic · 5 years

Note

Hi! So I agree Liam is queer, and the pink🔺in his video compels me not to ignore it. I saw one of your Ziam posts making its rounds after the SIU video, so I thought you were the person to ask. I only joined the fandom after Zayn left, and I’ve always had a hard time finding info on why and how that played out at the time (nobody seems to agree). Could you elaborate (or link to previous posts) on why you think Ziam is still a thing, and how they are telling us? Thanks for your insight so far!

Hi anon!

Thank you so much for thinking of me! I’m sorry it’s taken me a little while to answer, but it took me a bit to gather all the info I wanted (while I should’ve been working oop).

Okay, please know that this post is gonna be loooooong, so I’ve popped it under the cut.

You’re right about nobody agreeing on Zayn leaving the band, and it makes sense that people have differing views. It’s such a complicated thing; there was a lot happening at the time.

I’m going to start by saying there’s a brilliant masterpost about Zayn leaving here. It’s incredibly detailed, talks about pretty much every aspect of it, and there’s so much to look into. It’s also wonderful to demonstrate how much the boys and Zayn still hinted at things and loved each other, like Harry using Zayn’s mic one night, Liam talking about him fondly in interviews, Niall still calling him by his nickname, and Louis wearing his clothes.

It’s a long read, but incredibly worth it, as it this stunting timeline.

Everyone is absolutely entitled to their opinion, so I’ll just give you mine. I’m gonna keep it (kind of) short though. A lot of what I’m about to say can be found in the masterposts I’ve linked above.

I believe that Zayn leaving was out of his control, and was never completely his decision. I believe that he was set to return, but for some reason, the plan changed. Mind of Mine was apparently written before he left, and while I think he would’ve been working on solo music before he left (and that all of them were to some extent), to tease an album right after the announcement that he left makes no sense. A contract like the one that 1D had/has with Syco would cost an obscene amount of money to get out of, and Zayn’s net worth didn’t change at all. They made it seem so simple in the very few interviews with Zayn afterwards, saying he just called his security, got on a plane, and left. I think Zayn struggled a lot with everything, they all did, but I don’t think he could’ve just left. There were articles put out about his new album that mentioned Simco and everything, but when people pointed out that it didn’t make sense with the narrative that Simon felt ‘betrayed’, the references were removed straight away.

There’s also a very solid theory that MoM was counted as One Direction’s sixth and final contracted album, and it really stands up. Check it out!

Look. There’s a lot to unpack with the whole situation, and I’ve hardly touched on it at all, but I really do encourage you to look into it with everything I’ve linked above 💞

Okay, now onto the second part of your ask!

Ziam. My loooovveesss.

I’m going to start by saying that there’s a lot of ways that Liam and Zayn have hinted that they’re still together, and honestly? The boys ain’t even subtle about it. I’ll start by talking about heaps of ways they’ve done that since Zayn left!

Alright, let’s start with the fact that they WILL NOT STOP LIKING, REBLOGGING, AND RETWEETING POSTS FROM ZIAM ACCOUNTS.

(x) (x)

These aren’t subtle Ziam accounts, and it’s not just these examples. This also isn’t just something in the past; that bottom right one references Stack It Up.

They’ve also both reposted fanart from a well known Ziam where each drawing referenced the other one.

(x)

The Zayn art says ‘Love Payne’ on the beanie. Well then.

And the Liam one? That he posted on his personal insta? The artist added the ‘love’ tattoo from Zayn’s hand onto Liam’s. It’s obvious, and it’s not like Liam wouldn’t have noticed that suddenly there was a new tattoo added ON HIS OWN HAND.

Not very subtle, hey.

It’s also not the only shady social media activity related to the boys 👀

There was the time that Liam explained why he’d written ‘personally’ twice in a thank you post in his insta story to Bvlgari.

But he hadn’t. What had happened was that Twitter account @TheZiamNews had made a small mistake, and had actually written it twice. The only explanation was that Liam saw it on a Ziam update page VERY quickly, thought he had made the original mistake, and then explained. Interesting that Liam keeps up to date with them.

There was also the time Liam blocked an account for talking absolute shit about Zayn, or when Herbie Critchlow (a producer from Icarus Falls) retweeted a tweet about Common being about Ziam. Also can’t forget Brandon Colbein posting on insta about some songs he’d written, and somehow there was one for Zayn and one for Liam.

Oh, and when Liam’s friend Andy (who seems to…split the fandom, but alas) posted a video of him listening to Icarus Falls, or every single mirroring insta post Liam and Zayn can’t seem to help making.

And their eyebrow slits! 😊 this goes allllll the way back to One Direction days.

(x)

Now, this is a constant, recurring thing for them over the years.

It’s usually at the same time, and it usually signifies something.

Zayn went ALL OUT one day, just after Z*gi ‘broke up’, and put a slit in his eyebrow, but it wasn’t a normal one. It was in the shape of an L. That fucking sap. Not to be outdone though, Liam popped a lil’ Z in the graphics for his show last year in Japan.

SAPS, THE BOTH OF THEM.

Now, jewellery.

OOOOOF are we in for it now. You’re probably regretting this ask already.

Cartier.

Say that single word around someone who believes in Ziam and you’ve lost them forever.

Back in 2015 (so yes, a while ago but bear with me) during the OTRA tour, Zayn suddenly started wearing a gold Cartier bracelet. It was interesting because Zayn didn’t wear bracelets at the time. It was particularly interesting because Liam had been seen earlier that day with jewellery bags buying a present. Curious.

Or obvious.

Either or.

A similar thing happened when Zayn attended the ‘Straight Outta Compton’ premiere, one of his first appearances after he left the band. He was wearing a Hublot watch, which was also interesting because Zayn didn’t wear watches either.

But GUESS WHERE LIAM HAD BEEN 2 DAYS BEFORE THE PREMIERE?

You’re damn right, anon. It was Hublot.

Now, the Cartier love bracelet.

This picture was posted when Liam was getting ready for the Brits in 2017. For those that don’t know, the Cartier love bracelet has little screws, and can only be undone with a little gold screwdriver that comes with it.

Liam wore it everywhere that year, and so often. It didn’t make sense for it to be ‘given to him by Ch*ryl’, because they would’ve used every opportunity to show that damn screwdriver.

But they didn’t, because she didn’t have it. Zayn did.

There’s also the other matching bracelets they’ve worn by Alexander McQueen.

And also the other time Zayn wore Cartier in his film clip, or the fact that Zayn started wearing a ring on his right ring finger that was sold and marketed by Cartier AS A WEDDING RING.

They also share watches if Zayn decides to wear one, because they’re cute like that.

Now, they also share clothes.

So many clothes, ohmygod.

(x)

A prime example of this actually happened just last year! TWICE! IN NYC WHEN LIAM WAS THERE (obviously to see his husband). Both times, Liam was out and about wearing two of Zayn’s jackets.

It’s also absolutely not a coincidence that when Zayn was staying at G*gi’s apartment on Bond Street, Liam stayed at a hotel a few minutes away a number of times, but when Zayn moved to Soho, Liam suddenly switched hotels to one in Soho, a few minutes away from Zayn’s new place. Just can’t stay away from an old band mate you hardly talk to, hey.

Also can’t ignore Liam wearing numerous Kooples shirts during the time Zayn was doing promotional stuff for them. Husbands givin’ gifts.

NYC isn’t the only city that relates to Ziam though!

Ahhhhhhhh. Ziami. What a time, what a time, what a time (for you and I).

Anyway.

At the start of last year, Liam and Zayn were both in Miami at the same time filming music videos for Let Me and Familiar respectively, arriving either at the same time or a day apart. It was at a time when Zayn was all over his socials, posting poems and selfies and generally being his relaxed, gorgeous self, which wasn’t incredibly common for a while.

People were convinced they could hear Zayn in one of Liam’s insta stories, talking in the background just before Liam realises and raises his voice. It’s definitely not firm though, and Liam has someone in his team with a similar accent, but I’ve linked it so you can judge for yourself! Regardless, we knew they were both there, but it was a fun lil’ talking point!

Anyway, according to people who live in the area and know the coastline, they were in the same area at the same time, and we also knew that Liam wasn’t with Ch*ryl because she was back in the UK. Now, Liam posted an Instagram story the next morning half naked in bed, his 4 tattoo (we’ll get to that) and roses on full display, and saying he’d wrecked his voice.

Well then.

He also posted this.

It was a video, but it was Liam, in his room ‘alone’ with two desserts for breakfast at a time when we knew Zayn was there and no one else was, and he suddenly had no voice.

Okay okay, we get it.

They also consistently reference the number 25, and honestly, no one knows why the fuck.

Just casually on Liam’s jackets and shoes, Zayn’s shoes and a shirt that was sold (even the red and yellow, ffs Zayn), and also Zayn’s NECK, which he got in 2018. There was also chevrons on a collection for Zayn, just like Liam’s tattoos.

Speaking of tattoos Zayn got in 2018.

That big, red wolf on his chest just up there?

One of the biggest Ziam things to ever happen.

Red was Liam’s mic colour in 1D, everything they fucking do seems to be related to red, and Liam’s nickname is Wolfie because he’s from Wolverhampton.

It’s a red wolf, directly on his chest, and it’s 100% for Liam. It’s not the only red wolf tattoo Zayn has; he also has one on his leg with feathers, just like Liam’s feather tattoo.

The media often talk about the eyes Zayn has underneath that, and that they’re for G*gi, but the eyes underneath are so much lighter than the surrounding ink, the shape fits easily, and to me, it seems clear they’ve been done in a way that they can easily be inked over. It was designed for a cover up, and hopefully it’s coming. Zayn also has Liam’s name literally inked into his skin.

They also have coordinating hand tattoos. The mandala on Zayn’s hand and the roses on Liam’s are explained brilliantly in this post. The two of these together mean ‘Symbol of Eternity’. Fucking hell.

The three roses on Liam’s hand also translates to ‘I love you’. FUUUCCCKKKKKKK.

Liam also wore a ring for a while, until he was forced to take it off, but then he rebelled anyway, and got this.

It’s important because not only is it on his wedding finger, it’s also what he said about it, and when he got it.

Now, not only is 4 as an angel number about changing the only things that you can in a situation, but Liam directly said that’s what it was. He can’t wear a wedding ring, so he did the next best thing.

It also came when Liam and Ch*ryl became ‘official’, and when he’d already quashed marriage twice in an interview. Interesting choice, then. He also spoke of the 4 and a ring forming a halo, but still somehow shut down marriage talk?

…….okay then.

Some incredibly brilliant people pointed out that it also came just before Valentine’s Day.

And just before he started wearing the Cartier bracelet from earlier.

There’s also the blatant references to a gorgeous, loving relationship throughout Icarus Falls, especially in Common and There You Are. There You Are was pushed as a Z*gi song, but people realised it was impossible when they found old pictures of the name of the song on his original plan for Mind of Mine, and realised it just hadn’t made that album. It doesn’t fit their timeline at all, but it does fit Ziam.

We don’t see Zayn very much at the moment, and I’m glad that he’s taking his time just doing what he’s doing! It does mean that we hardly see them interact or reference each other much, but I have absolutely no reason to believe they’ve broken up. The fact that they’re both still going through PR relationship bullshit, and the timing of Liam getting a ‘girlfriend’ right now instead of just rumours is very interesting to me, because Z*gi officially finished again not that long ago. When one is ‘single’, the other can’t be, it seems.

This isn’t even everything, anon. They’re not subtle; Zayn just isn’t in the public eye as much.

Everything they do screams love, devotion, and commitment to each other.

And it’s fucking gorgeous.

#ziam #zayn leaving #ziam tattoos #ziam coincidences #zayn malik #liam payne #ziam evidence #masterpost

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ddaenghoney · 4 years

Text

chapter five

masterlist link in blog description.

As a successful songwriter, you want nothing more than the acknowledgment that the chart-topping musical pieces are your own creations. But contracts, relationships, and the difficulty of facing the stakes involved head on, keep your mouth shut until pressure builds too much.

Pairing(s): Park Jimin x Y/N, Min Yoongi x Y/N

disclaimer: any characters depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respected idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Chapter-based written fic, Slow-burn relationship(s), Fake-dating, Unrequited love, Songwriter/producer!oc, idol!Jimin, idol/songwriter/producer!Yoongi, friends with benefits, drama, romance, smut, angst, fluff (updated as needed)

Chapter warning(s): none.

Word count: 5340

if you enjoy please, please let me know!

The onslaught of work involved in helping a girl group ready themselves for their upcoming comeback left you thankfully busy. Personal preference dictates whether your input in the songs’ meanings is used; some idols prefer to create their own interpretations of the songs so that they’re not completely absent of the creative process, while others let you tell them in detail what the lyrics are intended to mean so that your touch isn’t completely lost. In either scenario, the idols generally think of what is more respectful to you, and the mixed opinions of what that means has been long undefined. At this point, you don’t care either way. The song won’t be remembered as your creation, whether the true meaning is stated or not makes no difference.

In any case, the quartet of girls in this group preferred your meanings. Along with that they’re also grateful for you to help in sound arrangement as well; letting things be put together in your vision. Timing-wise you’re happy to help them out, eager for long hours to be focused on various tasks rather than the instances of running into Jimin around the company.

Before you know it, it’s not as cold throughout the daytime, and Namjoon’s conversations with you commonly track back to his conception of menu items for spring that seems to be moving in fast.

“Y/N,” Your stupor disturbs at Yoongi’s voice. You turn in your chair, finding him peeking from the opening of the company lounge, “My stylist wants you to see her when you can.”

Along with the passing of time, the pictures dropped New Year’s Eve of you and Yoongi died away in the online forums after being publicized for a week on multiple magazine headlines. Despite Yerin stating you both would act as a couple, SoundWave never made an announcement confirming what the pictures seemed to mean to everyone. You were silently grateful of the fact, ignoring it and hoping it would drift into the corner of thought and forgotten entirely. The idea crushed from an email notification on your phone last week sent to both of you stating you needed to go on a date sometime to renew the public’s interest.

“Okay.” You nod your head at Yoongi and he leaves practically the second he hears confirmation. Like Jimin, you haven’t spoken to Yoongi much in the past month and a half. Just as you assumed, his perception of you dropped when he learned of your position in the company. You can’t be bothered to clarify anything with how you’ve felt lately anyways.

Still, his dismissive attitude in that moment causes your eyes to roll, and you spin on the chair back to your open laptop and half-finished, now cold coffee. How in the hell the two of you could manage to interact in a way that resembles a couple is beyond you. Nonetheless, he hasn’t mentioned his desire to rebel and skip out on the date idea, so you can only assume he intends to follow through with the demands.

“I picked out some outerwear from a sponsor on his upcoming album.” Yoongi’s stylist is peppier than either of you about the occasion, and you almost ask her to go on it in your place. She guides you to a near empty rack, only showcases three elegant and expensive coats of vastly different styles. “I wasn’t sure what sort of things you wear usually, so there’s some variety to help you make a comfortable outfit. I’d really appreciate if you’re out seen in one of them though.”

You nod, actually happy that she mentioned taking your preferences into consideration. It seems to be a concept unfamiliar to Yerin. “I wasn’t really going to dress up much. Actually I don’t really know what he and I plan to do for the date. He just said he’ll pick me up at my place at seven.” You shrug, pulling on the sleeve of one of the more eccentric jackets to get a better view of it and the embellishments. Not something you think you could pull off. “Probably stand in a park let people take pictures and go home.” The stylist laughs next to you, pulling another longcoat from the rack and removing the hanger so you could try it on.

“When I saw him earlier, Yoongi was asking me about good locations for a date actually.” She steps from you to look over the coat, analyzing its fit on you. “I like this one, the color is easy to match things with.” You turn towards the mirror, judging the dark blue fabric for yourself.

“He did?” You’re audibly surprised, almost forgetting to pay attention to the clothing.

“Yeah,” She sits back into a chair, letting you move around to test its comfortability. “Well, granted he’s pretty jaded about the whole thing, but I guess he figures he needs to make the best of it?” She shrugs, fingers tapping away at her phone screen. “I guess it could be just to look like you’re both natural.”

That’s true. You shrug off the coat, “I’ll wear this one, if it’s okay.” She grins standing back up and taking the clothing from you, rambling about it looking great and that she’ll put it in a bag so you can take it home, along with some accessories from the same brand that you didn’t have to wear, but it’d be so kind of you to do so. While she moved around you think of how much he intends to present himself as your boyfriend. Frankly, you prefer hand holding to be the maximum public affection. “You worked with Yoongi at the other company, right?”

“Oh yeah,” The stylist steps to you with the large bag in hand, “I’ve been on his styling team for almost two years.”

“So,” You speak slowly, trying to phrase the question best, “If he has a bad opinion of someone, is it likely to change if he gets to know them, or,” You bite your lip, shrugging in defeat, “Is it just something I’ll have to deal with indefinitely?” “He doesn’t like you?” Her head tilts in evident confusion and surprise, “Wouldn’t have guessed. I don’t know though, maybe if it’s a misunderstanding or you both just got off on the wrong foot he may think differently if you clear it up?”

---

If you think about it in the way his stylist explained, obviously clearing up the wrong ideas would be the best solution. In the least it would give the best chance at an amicable work experience from then on, instead of the begrudging interactions that currently occur. Would he listen to your reasoning is the issue.

Your phone buzzes from the coffee table, and the message is what you expect.

Yoongi, 7:14pm: I’m in front of your apartment building.

Y/N, 7:14pm: Heading down then.

You nearly grimace, sliding the luxurious coat over your shoulders. If the entire night is going to consist of monotone conversation or lack thereof while awkwardly clinging to one another like a couple, then you didn’t know how long you could stand it. One date sounds bad enough, but to think there’s an indefinite amount following leaves you sighing as the elevator takes you down.

For some reason you dramatically, in the corner of your mind, anticipate press from the moment you step out of the front door. Like they tail Yoongi for the chance of any abnormal information, or even what brand of cereal he gets at a supermarket. The reality is the low activity of the street in front of your apartment, and the motor of Yoongi’s Audi R8 humming in the midst of it all. The picturesque scene of the beautifully sleek dark gray, shiny finish is what you expect to remember the most tonight.

“So do I get to find out eventually where we’re going?” You ask him after a short greeting mixed with you strapping against the wonderfully pristine leather. Yoongi’s fingertips tap on the steering wheel, a pensive expression making his eyebrows crease,

“Honestly, I couldn’t think of something.”

You nod, pulling out your phone to try and think of your own ideas, “Do you want to eat?”

“Can I ask you something?” He turns towards you slightly, and you realize the car is in park when an arm strays from the wheel to the center armrest. Your body shifts from his as a reaction, apprehensive though unconscious of the fact. Your head tilting yes tells him to go on. “Are you really okay with this all? You accept it?”

“I don’t really have a choice otherwise do I?” Your eyebrows narrow at his assumptions of you. “What do you expect me to say to the CEO? That I refuse to do this all?”

“It’d be a start if you’re also trying, yeah.” The word ‘also’ registers in your head, and you wonder how many times he’s tried to talk his way out of this to Yerin. Or if he had at all. You believe so. From the image portrayed in the public of him, Yoongi nonconforming to the false relationship sounds plausible.

“Maybe you can say something, but I’ll lose my job.” You start scanning through your app of trending eateries in the city. A new place to try so at least something good can come out of the evening.

“She said that?” He’s surprised and you only shrug, still eyeing the device.

“No, but what’s stopping her. I’m not like you where the press is going to question what happened. She has nothing to lose getting rid of me. I don’t contribute like any of you idols, right?” Quiet envelops the end of your small rant, a long breath heaving from your lungs at restarting the frustration you feel. Yoongi notices your fingers stop scrolling along the screen, and your glaring eyes to complete the scowl. There’s more for you to tell, but you’re silent.

“From what I’ve learned, you’re practically the sole reason why the company took off in sales almost four years ago.”

Your head turns towards Yoongi. He lacks an apologetic tone and does not seem particularly impressed either, but something about his eyes gentle, approachable gaze makes you think there’s even an inkling of hope for his opinion of you. Incidentally, no one else has attempted to look up a record of all the hits and award winning tracks you’ve created. To go from nothing to his observative comment, it feels like a step in a different-- new direction.

“Can we go do something, please?” It feels like you shouldn’t dwell on the ideas vaguely present in his words. With the impossibility of change engulfing you in the form of Yerin’s firm words, you didn’t want to think about the world that exists in acknowledging all of your contributions to SoundWave like it feels with the simple sentence of Yoongi’s observations. Because it’s not able to happen. Just the fewest of people know what you do and only three, four now you suppose, have an inkling to acknowledge the fact.

In the drive to a small park a couple of blocks from a restaurant he enjoys, Yoongi and you settle into the quiet of the ride. You can avoid thinking of everything by studying the interior of the car and internally debating on whether you wanted to invest in a driver’s license after all. “Should we go over rules?”

You startle from staring at the digital screen and all of the buttons surrounding it with their countless functions. A nod to cover your daze, then a clearer response that blurts without your mind filtering, “I barely even want to accept holding hands to be honest with you.”

Your hand travels to your mouth at the brash statement, but the nerves clear when Yoongi interrupts your internal monologue of swearing with laughter. Completely amused by your surprised slip of words, and wonders if you had the habit of doing that like you had at Namjoon’s bar cafe.

“Good, we’re on the same page then.” He nods, slowing to a stop at a red light. You stare inquisitively, thinking the avoidance of physical affection to be wonderful considering the situation, and even suitable to the personality you’ve seen of him in the sparing amounts you’ve spoken to him. But unsuitable to the SUGA in papers for over a year. Though he’s never had a public relationship, you only recall an uncaring, do-whatever-I-feel-like persona ever to be depicted.

For the sake of the public’s sight, you both walk through the park, hands clasping together. You both aren’t likely to win any awards for the endeavor, and instead maybe even an ear full from Yerin about a lack of sincerity, but frankly you don’t care. The gentle sway of your arms between one another as you stroll along is enough for you, and endurable when he mentions the pizza at the restaurant to always be hand tossed and have a wonderful soft to crispy ratio.

“What’s your favorite of the songs you’ve made?” The question comes after some languid sips of beer on his end and hard cider on your own. It’s random given the conversation topics from before lead to short replies and silence, whereas the current one is something you think you could talk about for hours if he doesn’t stop you. You hum, slumping back into your seat while Yoongi comfortably drinks more.

“There was this one that I made that was called Puzzles, and it’s about,” You pause, wondering if you’re going to appear like you’re rambling, but Yoongi stares back attentively. “I guess just the idea about pressures holding someone back and how it’s difficult to overcome your own self to try and achieve something you want.” His eyes drift and you take a long sip, assuming you bored him.

“Is that one a group hasn’t used yet?” Yoongi asks after consideration, his lips almost pouting at himself being unable to recall the title ever appearing on the charts. You’re a little stunned by the response, having not expected him to try and remember the song.

“Oh, it was released under the name Meteor Shower.”

“Why?” More confusion in his voice. You refrain a disheartened smile from the truth of it,

“Just what they decided.” Dissatisfaction in your voice registers in Yoongi’s ears. “I don’t really have a say.” You go on, fingers tracing against the condensation of your drink’s glass.

“Jimin,” Your head raises in an instance at the name he says. Yoongi notes the action and falls briefly into silence, then goes on slowly, “He was the one who used that song, right?”

You bite your lip at your impulse, wishing you have better control over your reaction to just his name in the air. You nod at Yoongi’s answer, not minding a lack of follow up questions. When that fact of the song comes back into the light, you remember also how Jimin’s never heard the meanings behind songs that he’s used of yours. Always preferring to create his own interpretation so that he wouldn’t be completely taking from you.

“I hope he’s not mad at you for having to do this whole relationship thing.” Yoongi comments quietly, staring towards the tabletop that awaits a pizza. When he thinks about it, he hasn’t seen Jimin around the company at all to apologize to him about the situation at hand, considering himself to be a part of the cause for the false relationship occurring in the first place.

“He’s not. Don’t worry about it.” You say before inhaling. You take a large gulp of the sour beverage as Yoongi looks at you skeptically. Setting the now empty glass back down, you exhale, avoiding eye contact but smiling emptily, “He and I aren’t anything anymore. Really don’t worry.”

As an opposite reaction, Yoongi’s mouth parts in shock, immediately thinking that what happened outside of Namjoon’s cafe, just a simple offer to wait with you until the taxi arrived, caused not only the mess of a fake relationship, but now dissent between you and Jimin. The waiter settles the pizza on the table, steam flowing from the top, and toppings perfectly cooked just as Yoongi had told you. You ask for the same beer as Yoongi before the waiter quickly disappears to other tables.

“You both what?” You turn towards him, not expecting to be met with his horrified expression, “I’m sorry-- I’ll talk to him for you, if he’s angry-”

“He’s not.” You shake your head, hand raising to stop him from worrying further, and hoping to end the conversation before you’re able to dwell on everything like you’ve agreed with Namjoon not to do. “Really, explaining things would give me a headache-- I’ll probably cry too, so I won’t get into it,” You laugh slightly, somewhat nervous Yoongi thinks. “Point is: it’s not your fault. It’s over-” You nod your head once with your ending remark. The hand you have raised curls into a fist at that statement and Yoongi bites his lip. “This pizza looks delicious and I want to think about that.” You nod further until Yoongi head joins in your forcing agreement, then quickly shovels a large slice onto your plate.

Minutes pass eating pizza, and Yoongi finishing his beer before your second arrives, then him also ordering another as well. And there’s an understandable drop in conversation. A comment on the food being good on your end and Yoongi nodding, happened to be mid-bite when you speak the words so he’s unable to respond. So instead he contemplates how it’s possible that every topic about you that he tries to start ends up with being made to say something that upsets you. He thinks about those silly conversation starter threads and wonders if their dumb questions would’ve been a better way to speak than his purely innocent question of your favorite song you’ve made.

When Yoongi thinks more about what you’ve said, from the time you entered his car until the finishing conversation before the pizza arrives, he feels uncomfortable about the information you have disclosed. Even if Yerin hadn’t verbally threatened your job, just the fact that you felt like it would be gone the second you try to take a stand against the current way things are sounds incredibly bleak. When he considers the other idols in the company that he’s asked about you, it makes sense that you think that though. They’ve only mentioned small things, muttering uncertainties whenever he commented that it didn’t seem right for your songs to be credited to another name.

And with your complacency to the fake relationship, Yoongi wonders exactly how much control Yerin hovers over everyone in the company. Or if it’s just you that’s particularly handled so that you’ve learned to just accept things as they come.

Your plates lie empty on the table, save for the unfinished pizza crust from the last slice you tried to finish. Beside them are the second set of empty beer glasses, where Yoongi’s elbow settles next to his. He leans his cheek on his hand, your arms crossing over your front as you lean back in your seat. Your face feels warm and half of you blames the speed you downed the latter half of your beverage. Yoongi glances arbitrarily beyond you as other patrons enter the restaurant, not particularly focused on them or anything in the place. Just wondering how the hell he was supposed to do this every time Yerin sent a demand to your email accounts.

“Joon’s place isn’t far from here.” Yoongi’s eyes flick back to you as you stare aimlessly at the table. You go on, glancing to him, “Walking distance.”

Yoongi pays despite your protest that you would. All it takes is him simply reaching the cashier first, while you’re still managing to pull your coat back on. Your glare when he meets you has him shrug, taking your hand as he leads you both out despite your pouting expression. “Think of it as an apology.”

Despite your claim of closeness, the walk will take about fifteen minutes you say after already going far enough for it to be a little ridiculous to turn back around and walk an even greater distance to retrieve his car. Yoongi doesn’t change in disposition at the information, just a passive nod and an observation that the weather outside wasn’t that cold anyways.

“Can I say something now?” You ask him walking along the cement beside little shops in the park area that were starting to close for the evening. People roaming up and down around you to their own dining activities or other. The streetlamps buzz awake, luminating the way free of bugs in the wintertime.

“Okay.” Yoongi recalls saying that paraphrased line earlier. Has a hunch this is your time to bring about a conversation that would need to be forced into civility among the general public.

“I don’t like lying to people.” You say into the cool air, and Yoongi refrains from frowning at the randomness of the statement. “When I got into this job, I didn’t think it would lead to much. I thought it’d be insignificant. I didn’t have the foresight and I was stupid for not thinking about the long-term, sure,” You exhale and Yoongi remembers the conversation in the elevator. He bites his lip, realizing how his words never settled on your end. Why would they. “I guess you can think whatever you want about me, but I don’t like what I am in the company either. So don’t act like you’re the only one.”

You find Namjoon behind the counter when you both enter into his establishment. Releasing Yoongi’s hand, you start to shrug off your coat in the warmth of the cafe while Yoongi does the same with his jacket. Namjoon appears surprised to see Yoongi with you, though you told him you had to go on a date with him that evening, he never expected you to bring him to the cafe. You sit on your bar stool while Yoongi takes the one beside it, looking around at the relaxed environment because he hadn’t taken the opportunity the first time he was there.

“How’s the date thing?” Namjoon asks already having the answer from your responsive scowl and Yoongi’s dismissive shrug. Yoongi then pauses in consideration, glancing between the two of you,

“Wait, you told him?”

“He’s my best friend. From college, remember?” You say in return simply, tracing patterns on the counter. “I’m sure you’ve told someone you trust about this mess.” Yoongi’s head tilts in acceptance of that information, then looks to Namjoon as his arms cross over his chest.

“Did you both want something to drink or eat?”

“We just had dinner.” Yoongi tells him while you counter the question with a nod. Namjoon resists a humored smile at the lack of contentment stemming between you both. He knows it’s rude to laugh at all given the parameters of the relationship, but it’s still funny to look at when you’re both on completely different pages.

“I want the dessert drink I had the other day.” You say, “Get Yoongi the same one, I need to pay for something tonight.”

“You don’t.” Yoongi rolls his eyes, pulling out his phone as he feels a text notification. While he replies to it you give Namjoon a look that says you do in fact need to pay. Namjoon nods once in response and walks off to make your drinks, laughing to himself once he’s turned away. “I’m sorry about always saying something insensitive to you, by the way.”

“What do you mean?” You continue tracing patterns on the wood, watching from a distance as Namjoon prepares the drinks as if you’ll ever be able to replicate whatever he does.

“Well I think you’ve ended up mad at something I say every time I’ve spoken to you.” You turn your head resting on your palm to face Yoongi, nearly combatting his thoughts until he continues along quieter, “And it’s usually warranted. Especially what I said to you in the elevator.”

The reflection he’s taken towards his words is clear to you. You’re somewhat upset with yourself at his apologies, because he’s commonly sent them in your direction when he feels like they’re needed. You believe he’s judged what he sees and hears of you, but you’re guilty of the same misinterpretations towards Yoongi.

“I’m just overly sensitive.” You turn the blame towards yourself, and Yoongi shakes his head, stopping you from going further into self-deprecation.

“I was angry in the elevator about this dating thing, and took it out on you because of how confused I was when you told me about your job.” He pauses at the word, eyebrows creasing to quickly add, “Which, yeah, I don’t like it, but I don’t know the story behind it, so,” He shrugs, “Frankly I can’t rationalize it, but I think you really don’t like it too, so I’ll stop being a jerk about it.” You bite your lip, nearly chuckling at an inappropriate time from his apologetic rambling. Humor drifts from your eyes when Yoongi finishes, much softer, more resigned, “And if someone brings up subjects that hurt to talk about, you shouldn’t feel sensitive about it. It’s not your fault that some things are hard to discuss.”

You sense that there are his own memories swimming through the insinuation of the words. Obviously, Yoongi has past events that would give him the same scraping feeling to bring into the surface, so perhaps it is something he’s reminding himself by saying that. Nonetheless, the sentiment is comforting.

“You’re right.” Yoongi glances towards you, biting his inner cheek when your lips cast the smallest of smiles. Grateful, he thinks. But more importantly like the ground beneath you both feels even again.

Namjoon returns settling cups on saucers before you both. Cutely decorated with penguins for the winter season, foam frothing barely over. “This has alcohol in it,” He tells Yoongi while you’re scoffing as you reach for one. “I doubt she ever told you, because she drinks it like water, but just so you know.”

Yoongi nods a little, smiling at the tidbit of information while you mutter something about being a strong drinker and that’s it. “Actually, I forgot. I’m driving aren’t I.”

You and Namjoon both look at Yoongi, whose face appears slightly embarrassed and just as surprised at the fact.

“Joon, this is your chance to drive an Audi.” You tug at Namjoon’s sleeve, watching him recoil away,

“No thanks, driving’s not my thing.” You squint, while Yoongi resigns and sips at the sweet dessert drink that tastes to him something like a hot, spiked, milk tea. “Y/N, I already piss the workers off when we used to go go-karting.” You nod at the memory, smiling softly as you recall them practically ready to yell at him when he somehow managed to drive out of the track.

“I’ll get us a taxi.” Yoongi says, enjoying the drink immensely as he continuously drinks. You open your mouth to protest as Namjoon beats you to it.

“Always a taxi with you two.” You and Yoongi both glare at his words, watching Namjoon’s arms rise in defense, then he side-steps away, “Heard my name getting called from somewhere--” He ignores you shaking your head at his nonsense. “Be back eventually.”

“He’s a dumbass sometimes, sorry.” You finally take the first sip of your drink while Yoongi sets his glass down. Nearly empty, he attempts to savor the rest.

“It’s okay.” He says simply, finger tapping quietly while trying to register the song that plays in the background. You feel like the silence is more bearable, at least amicable. The warm drink in hand is easy to enjoy; a nice difference from when you both scarfed down pizza to avoid further conversation.

“What’s your favorite song that you’ve made?” You finally return the question nearly two hours later. Yoongi smiles at the fact, then sits upright in his seat, considering the different songs and their various importances to him. Yoongi hums to let you know he’s just thinking. You smile towards him, finding his craned neck to look towards the ceiling while he mulls it over slightly endearing.

“Closure-wise So Far Away means the most to me.” He answers, thoughts in his head warm at the mention of the track. You take only a second to recall the one Yoongi refers to, and shift on your seat towards him, nodding,

“I love that song.” You’re reminded of the time you heard it on shuffle in a new release playlist, that particular period of your life having been stressful for various, multiple reasons, but the night it came on you were able to escape and just enjoy the lyrics. “I think it’s still one of the songs that’s always in my ‘most listened to’ playlist from the end of last year.” You go on, not catching Yoongi’s intent gaze and lips tightening to refrain from any type of proud smile. Instead he appears a little shy at your apparent affection towards his song. His hand strays to fidget a small rub on the back of his neck while your sentences conclude and you’re left finally realizing your actions. “Oh, I’m sorry, I went a little on my own tangent there.” Flustered. You take a sip of your drink while Yoongi just shrugs, smiling a little flicker towards the bartop,

“No problem. I’m sure you know there’s no overboard when telling someone how much they like something you’ve made.” He’s in his own thoughts for moments, recollecting scrolling through social feeds for hours after releasing new tracks to see the response. Hearing an audience sing back the lyrics and pull out signs telling him that his work is meaningful, comforting, helpful-- heard. There’s nothing other than appreciation for your words in Yoongi’s head.

Until the silence lingers and his neck turns back towards you. Your thumb traces the outside of the ceramic, eyes in the direction of the foam settled on the drink. A contemplative expression that appears also unfulfilled. Yoongi’s lips part to speak but he says nothing as he realizes that you’ve likely never had a fan or listener to your creations tell you their opinions of the songs. Any feedback from the public is directed to other faces, and you’re never the receiver.

On the ride to your apartment, Yoongi considers your age, and the time you’ve worked with SoundWave. The contract your under, the bits and pieces of the circumstances he has the information of. Refraining from lingering conversations of your situation, and opposed entirely to speaking to Yerin in favor of a change. Yoongi glances at you as you look out at the passing roads under city lights wrapped in January breezes. You’re absent of a fresh appearance like most of the population drifts into at the beginning of a new year. He thinks it’s disheartening, maybe even worrisome that if situations had been different for himself that he could’ve been in the same position that you’re in.

The position.

Yoongi frowns as the cab drives from his apartment, recalling the softness in your eyes and the forced, but amicable smile you gave to him when you exited the taxi at your stop. With his hands tucked deep into his pocket he remains motionless outside the building, chill trying to seep through the layers of his clothing, but he ignores it. Thinking instead of the sympathy that trickled into his chest when he heard the silence following his comment of hearing people say things about songs. The sympathy because he knew you felt the same: you’d enjoy listening to the sort of things fans say about your music. But Yoongi also felt a panging sensation saying you shouldn’t be unable to relate to him. The songs and some production even are entirely yours.

And to Yoongi you’re owed the acknowledgement from the world as such.

if you enjoy please, please let me know! i hope you enjoy the series, i’m working really hard on it! : )

tag list (send an ask to be added): @jaiuneamesolitaiire @tsvkino-usagi

#yoongi imagine #jimin imagine #bts imagine #yoongi fic #jimin fic #bts fic #yoongi #jimin #bts #yoongi fluff #jimin fluff #bts fluff #yoongi angst #jimin angst #bts angst #all #series veil

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roseskiesandbutterflies · 4 years

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Killer Queen - Chapter 9: Coming Soon

Summary: Arabella Ruth White is the fifth member of the Marauders. And life at Hogwarts certainly isn’t easy. Especially when you have alcohol, relationships, unhealthy music obsessions, a fake stage persona, weird ass friends with weird ass problems and actual school all thrown into the equation. (This story is also on Wattpad and AO3 of the same name. I will always update on Wattpad first.)

Warning(s): none that I can see

Taglist: @bhmay @briarrose26 @bijoukitty ask to be on my taglist!

Inspired by: A Night At The Opera, various Marauders headcanons I’ve seen on Pinterest, this quarantine business, The Boy Who Killed God by @sirius-black-killed-god on AO3, All The Young Dudes by MsKingBean89 on AO3

Word count: 4.3k+ (holy shit)

A/N: I beg of you follow Ruth's advice on how to handle a record because some people do it Wrong. Don't be one of those people, please. Somehow, she's 16 now which is weird, but not that weird seen as she is literally a figment of my own imagination. This chapter is over 4000 words long which makes it the longest thing I've ever written.

I’m thinking about changing the point of view again. I’m currently in first but I might change it to third. First is good for funny scenes like in this chapter, but it’s not ideal for the deeper stuff I have planned later. Yes, I have a plot. Shock horror. But we shall wait and see on that one. If I do change it, I won’t edit the previous chapters to fit it because I really can’t be bothered.

Everyone, please stay safe because of what's going on and stay optimistic and occupied. For example, I'll have more time to write! It's a scary time but it will pass, like everything does at some point. OK I've gotten too philosophical. I shall stop now. This chapter is sponsored by me calling Dr Brian Harold May 'Clog Man'. This chapter title comes from Queen's 1980 album, 'The Game'.

“Good morning, peasants!” I declared as I quite literally swept into Transfiguration that morning, a crown perched precariously atop of my head, my robe billowing behind me. My dearest courtiers trailed along in my wake, begrudgingly carrying my belongings. How generous of them, I thought to myself, as if they had had any say in the matter in the first place. My loyal subjects celebrated my entrance and I gracefully sat down in my assigned seat, feet on the table, chair tipped back at precisely the right angle. I didn’t want to fall and get a concussion, now did I? Especially not on that day of all days.

Now you may wonder what on Gaia’s green earth I am on about, you may begin to question my sanity, you may finally start to piece the clues together and realise I am in fact, a total nutter. About time you did, if I’m completely honest with you, darling. However, like most of my shenanigans, the reason for all this was a well-founded one, if I did say so myself. For Twas my birthday, my sixteenth birthday to be precise, and that meant I got to be queen for a day. Not as long as I would like but hey ho, it was better than nothing. I had all the time in the world to take over the world so being queen could wait for now. Even better than this temporary monarchy, becoming sixteen came with plenty of hobbies I could now I enjoy legally, such as having sex, smoking and drinking wine in a restaurant. As if the law had stopped me before. Following the law is for the weak and my mother did not raise me to be anything of the sort.

Now as a queen such as myself, it is my regal responsibility to keep up appearances, which, to put it simply, meant to look pretty damn fabulous at all times. Hence why I was sporting a magnificent golden crown enchanted to stay on my head for the whole day and matching robe-cloak-thing. You know what I’m on about. Personally, I was rather pleased with my attire. Unfortunately, the same could not be said for one Minerva McGonagall.

An exasperated sigh from the front of the classroom was reluctantly followed by, “White, dare I ask why you are not in proper uniform?” she gestured vaguely at my majestic outfit.

“It would certainly be rather daring of you, professor,” I replied, without missing a beat. A classic raised eyebrow went my way, so I let out a sigh of my own before saying, “Tis my sixteenth birthday, dearest Minnie. If I have to attend lessons on such an occasion, then I must be allowed to dress appropriately.”

“And you consider a crown half as big as yourself to be appropriate for school?” her wonderfully Scottish voice quipped back.

“Why of course ma’am, you see it’s what I like to call my thinking cap,” I grinned broadly at her before joining a giggling Sirius who had gone to great lengths to keep it all in.

But nothing in this godforsaken world, and I do not say that lightly, could have prepared me for Minnie’s response: “Then perhaps it will do you some good.” She turned to the blackboard behind her to begin the lesson I had partly succeeded in delaying.

I, on the other hand, wasn’t doing so well. I clutched at my chest as if I’d been shot, and believe me it felt like I had been, and dramatically fell into the arms of James, as he was the unfortunate soul who sat next to me. I weakly reached up to touch his face as they do in the muggle movies, made a mental note to remind him to fucking shave and heaved out, “Jamie, I won’t last much longer but there’s something I need to tell you.”

“What, my darling? What is it?” he asked, faithfully going along with my foolish antics as always, the poor sod.

“I…love…” I whispered before going limp in his arms as if I was dead.

“Ruth, my love, no!” he hugged my ‘corpse’ while sobbing rather profoundly.

Sirius leapt to his feet (I had to open my eyes slightly for this bit) and declared, “What do you mean ‘my love’? Ruth has been the love of my life since I first laid eyes on her!”

“You foul fiend! Ruth was the second reason for my very existence after Evans, thank you very much!” James too jumped up, leaving me to flop onto the stone floor with an ungraceful ‘ugh’. I could sense Lily’s annoyance from the other side of the classroom.

James and Sirius both grabbed their wands, pointed them at one another, but instead of cursing each other, they used them like fencing swords. Just before Sirius could ‘stab’ James, I myself jumped up and cried, “Wait!” at the same time Minnie yelled, “Enough!”

Naturally, we took no notice of this.

Both boys turned to look at me, only for me to say, “I don’t love either of you. I love Remus!” I pointed at the boy in question who in turn smirked his classic smirk.

He opened his mouth to speak only to be interrupted by an infuriated Minnie, “I said enough! Sit down, all three of you or it’s detention for a week!” Now I was pretty sure she was only letting us off because she was well aware that if I was given detention on my birthday, I would certainly not go. I’d like to think it was because she loved us dearly, but my mother didn’t raise me to be a liar either. Considering the circumstances, a.k.a. my huge fucking party I had planned for later on, I did what I almost never did.

I sat down.

Not without a snarky “ooooooooh” of course.

Naturally, Minnie wasn’t all that impressed with my reply, “Evans, swap seats with White, please.”

Naturally, I wasn’t all that impressed with her reply either, “Professor, are you seriously going to move me on my birthday?”

“That is correct.”

“Miss, that’s not fair, I haven’t even done anything that bad, we’re all in one piece, aren’t we? Besides, why is it only me that’s getting moved, what’s up with that?”

“You’re not the only one I’m moving, I’m also moving Evans, am I not?” she snapped, not at all pleased with my outburst, “Now please move seats, you are disrupting my lesson.”

I pouted like a little child on the naughty step, grabbed my stuff together and plonked myself where Lily had been sitting, next to a girl who had only started in September, from Greece or Italy or somewhere. I suddenly realised Lily was now sitting next to James, so I felt the need to apologise, “Sorry, Lily!”, I said in a similar manner to a kid who was forced to say sorry to their sibling after hitting them. She just shot me a reproachful look which had me fearing for my life for a second, before turning to the lesson that could finally begin.

Obviously, I wasn’t exactly keen to take part in the lesson, so I opted for attempting to get to know my new desk partner, “You’re the new girl, right?”

I was met with a blank stare and confusion from both parties until something clicked for me: if she had just moved here from another country then she probably didn’t speak much English.

Well shit.

I tried again, simplifying my language but hopefully not sounding too patronising, “Are you new?”

The poor girl still strongly resembled a deer in headlights but nodded, “Yes?”

“What’s your name, darling?” I was determined to get to know this girl, she seemed nice enough and, knowing from experience what it felt like to be the new kid, I felt a strange urge to help her.

She cocked her head to the side in confusion, now looking like an owl of some sort. It was at this point where I gave up and just waved her off, “Don’t worry.” If Minnie was as adamant about me staying in this seat as I suspected, I’d have plenty of time later to try and talk to this girl. Maybe when she knew a bit more English. Or maybe I could teach her some? Well saying that I’m not sure how good of a teacher I would actually be. I’d probably be more of a nuisance than a help.

The rest of the school day carried on in a similar fashion, with the usual jokes played out in a more dramatic manner than usual. Fine by me. The end of lessons couldn’t come soon enough but at last, they were over. Meaning I could finally, finally, open my damn presents.

Well, I say presents, but me being the impatient bastard that I am, I actually opened most of them that morning at breakfast. Which involved about a year’s supply of chocolate, a 10-pack of condoms and no less than three boxes of tea from various posh shops in London. And a hell of a lot of magical alcohol, which was far better than the muggle stuff, but we don’t talk about that. There was only one present left and that was the one from the woman who birthed me. I realise that I have led you under false pretences of sentiment towards my dear mother, and while I do in fact over her greatly, this is not the case. It was actually because our family owl, Bob (don’t ask me why he’s called fucking Bob, Rhea named him), is quite possibly slower than a bloody snail and took the whole day to fly from Cromer to Scotland.

I ran up the stairs to the boys’ dormitory, which is saying something considering I don’t run for anything, and there it was, laying on what was basically my bed when Kingsley wasn’t around, wrapped in shining gold paper, my birthday present. Instantly I got a huge sense of déjà vu, as I knew exactly what it was.

A vinyl record.

Because what else do I do with my spare time these days?

I carefully picked it up, observing it in the stream of November sunlight coming from the window. Judging from the size and weight of it, it was definitely an album, my excitement increasing tenfold. I opened it as carefully as possible to discover that it was indeed Queen’s new album. Their iconic crest was printed on the front in a loud colour scheme of orange and pink. The title was written in black cursive: ‘A Night At The Opera’. The whole thing, though relatively simple in its design, screamed regalness.

I was so mesmerised by it that I didn’t even see the envelope on the bed until I very nearly sat on it. My mum’s familiar handwriting addressed me on the front of it and inside was a card with the most gorgeous watercolour print of the Cromer Pier which had me missing it terribly. I opened it to read what she had written and I couldn’t wipe the grin off of my face.

To Ruth,

Happy birthday, darling! It’s hard to believe you’re 16 now, I still see you as my gorgeous baby girl! I know I can’t see you on your special day, but half term is less than a month away – you’ll be home before we know it!

I’m so proud of you and everything you’ve done, and we all love you very much. Have a wonderful day with your friends!

Lots of love,

Mum, Rhea and Luke xxx

P.S. Don’t tell Mum but I got you a sort of magical cactus from Diagon Alley but I’ll give it to you when you come back – Rhea

P.P.S What Rhea forgot to tell you is that the cactus was my idea, I just didn’t have any pocket money left after going to the sweet shop - Luke

I smiled at the message and at my siblings’ additions at the bottom and found myself missing them more than I anticipated. I put on my bedside table, next to the magical photo us the boys and me which never failed to make me laugh. It was of us knee-deep in the Great Lake, around the July of our third year. James had his back to the camera but still showed his face and his lopsided grin; he was carrying Sirius over his shoulder like a fireman, the latter of which was showing his middle finger to the camera as best he could. Peter was mid-fall in front of them, just seconds before face-planting the water. Remus was to the right of them, trying his best to avoid getting wet from Peter’s inevitable splash, his face all screwed up in an attempt to protect his eyes. I was trying to hoist myself up onto Remus’s shoulders, which wouldn’t have been so difficult if he wasn’t so fucking tall, even at 14 he was a giant. The photo was magical, so we were all moving around as we had been at the time. I was lucky enough to have caught the exact moment I pulled my wand out and cast the aguamenti charm, aiming at everyone’s head but more importantly, James and Sirius’s hair. The photo was an endless cycle of me jumping up, casting the spell and being chased around by everyone before going back to our original positions.

I reluctantly turned away from the treasured photo, picked up the album and turned to run to the Room Of Requirement so I could listen to the artistry I held in my undeserving hands. Somehow, my close good friends beat me to it; there they stood in the doorway, carrying my dear record player between them with wide grins on their faces, not altogether dissimilar from the one James sported in the photograph.

I wondered for a second how the vinyl got itself onto my bed, and how the boys knew they had to get my record player, but then I realised my mother must have told them in advance. She may have been a Hufflepuff, but I do sometimes think she would have made a fine Slytherin. Surprise kids, I don’t have a prejudice against the entirety of Slytherin house, just the ones who are, quite frankly, dickheads. Not my fault if that’s the majority of them.

They popped my dear baby on the floor and sat down various surfaces: the floor, their beds, Remus’s lap (*cough cough* Sirius *cough cough*). I ever-so-carefully removed the vinyl from its sleeve and placed it onto the turntable, only touching the outermost edges so as to not get grease into the grooves of the record. Now, I can’t be ruining it already.

“I hope you know we love you enough to carry that thing all the way here,” Sirius whined, mopping non-existent sweat from his forehead using’s Remus’s poor jumper. The audacity he had to refer to my precious record player as ‘that thing’. I didn’t hit him, which is very unlike me, but I refused to sink to his level. Twat.

“Thank you darling but I think, in the midst of wanting to show off your varying levels of strength, you all forgot you could simply levitate my baby here,” I flopped onto Remus’s bed (by far the cleanest one) as Peter repeatedly smacked James with a pillow, “What did I say, James? What did I fucking say?”

Poor James just groaned at him to stop, arms up in a quite frankly pathetic bid to protect himself. He looked at me helplessly, but I just shook my head with a cheeky smirk on my face, “Nope, you got yourself into this mess, I’m not getting involved.”

Sirius, on the other hand, was laughing so much that Remus had to move him from lying against his chest to having his head in his lap to prevent him from hurting himself. I was half-convinced that Sirius was in fact having a heart attack but at this point, I was not nearly drunk enough to put up with his bullshit. Oh yeah, forgot to mention we each took a shot after breakfast seen as it’s my birthday, only increasing our chances of getting alcohol poisoning within the next weekend or so. But let’s be honest, I’m only using my birthday as an excuse to drink more alcohol at eight o’clock in the morning.

A few more smacks and one case of concussion later, we had all calmed down enough for me to play my goddamn record. Suspense hung in the air as the tiny crackles of an unused record sounded, followed by a crescendo of lightning-fast piano. Definitely not what I expected from a song entitled ‘Death On Two Legs (Dedicated To…)’, until Brian’s slightly menacing guitar burst through the speakers. The rest of the carried on in a similar fashion, fancy piano and angry guitar combined with lyrics I could only describe as savage. I made a mental note to look at the enclosed lyrics later on to see what exactly Freddie was singing, as even for my standards it was rather mean. I also couldn’t help but wonder who this was dedicated to and what they had done for Freddie to sing about them in such a manner. Must be quite the dickhead. Maybe someone like Snivellus. You can’t get much worse than Snivellus.

The next song was called ‘Lazing On A Sunday Afternoon’ and I couldn’t help but giggle throughout it. It felt very vintage, the singing was distorted somewhat, but it seemed more as if they were taking the mick out of the genre. It was a little thing, hardly a couple of minutes long, and soon transitioned to ‘I’m In Love With My Car’, which I distinctly remembered from the B-side of ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’. That song will never fail to make me laugh. How a man can be so attached to his car, I’ll never know.

Those comedic masterpieces were followed by ‘You’re My Best Friend’, which I fell in love with within the first five seconds. The adorable little piano, the adorable little lyrics, the adorable little bass, okay I could go on like this for hours, but the point is that I loved this song and would gladly be its friend, were it a person. Yeah, I may have been a tad tipsy, might have had something to do with the shots we took between lessons on top of the one at breakfast. I had wanted to maintain a state of slight tipsiness throughout the day. Moving swiftly on.

‘39’ was next, and it was safe to say that I wasn’t expecting any of it. At first, the guitar made me chuckle, then the realisation that it was just vocals, guitar and fucking tambourine, and then the fact that it was almost certainly a county song about space. Brian was singing, of course it was Brian, and I seemed to have forgotten how talented a singer he actually is. And a songwriter because let’s be real, there is no way in hell that anyone in the band apart from Clog Man wrote this.

‘Sweet Lady’ came after that, which contrasted ‘39’ so much that it basically gave me whiplash. To be honest, I should have seen that coming seeing as that was how Queen seemed to work, a heavy rock song followed by something completely different and so on and so on. You’d think you’d grow tired of constantly changing styles but somehow Queen pulled it off magnificently, as they did with pretty much anything they set their minds to. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it, don’t get me wrong it was a cool song, just not quite my cup of tea. I felt a little bit guilty about not liking it, but I forced myself to remember that I didn’t have to like every song on the album in order to be a fan.

‘Seaside Rendezvous’ was the next song and the last one on side A. I found it very quirky and much more to my liking. I could easily imagine myself going for a stroll down the beach back at home while humming this. And potentially dancing to it down the pier. Although I would look quite the crackhead as no one else would be able to hear it; but since when did I care about looking like a twat? I was already friends with plenty of twats, I stopped caring years ago. Somewhere in the middle of the song, there was a part that sounded like an orchestra of some kind, but I could tell Roger had something to do with the woodwind section, which led to some rather interesting images in my mind. Make of that what you will. The tap-dancing part made me laugh because I highly doubted that any of them could actually tap dance, leading to me wondering how to the fuck they did that. My brain also thought it was necessary to conjure up some cursed images of Brian tap-dancing in his clogs. Fucking hell, what was wrong with me?

As quickly and carefully as I could, I flipped the record onto the B-side, which started off with ‘The Prophet’s Song’. I was so naïve to think that ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ was long; this bad boy was all of eight minutes and basically a musical on its own, worthy of the likes of the West End or Broadway. The absolute artistry of the lyrics and the music quickly made it one of my favourites so far, which was saying something as I loved the whole damn album anyway. There was a good couple of minutes of straight acapella, mainly just countless overdubs of Freddie singing ‘no I know’ at various different pitches; then Roger and Brian joining in for a chorus of ‘la la la la la’. It was strangely creepy, and I had yet to figure out if that was their intention.

That then flowed almost seamlessly into ‘Love Of My Life’, a melancholic ballad that was as beautiful as it was sad. It didn’t take me long to work out that it was a harp rather than an acoustic guitar, I grinned at the mental images of Brian learning the harp for the sake of this one song. Surely if he’d known how to play it all along, he would have shown off his musical prowess much earlier.

Naturally, the next song flipped this whole vibe that had just been created on its head. ‘Good Company’ was its name and it involved a whole band created solely by Brian’s guitar. It seemed funny to me, but I didn’t know why. A bit like with ‘Sweet Lady’, I wasn’t all too sure if I like it or not. I did notice Brian singing again; it was nice to hear his voice on the record more, not to diss Freddie or Roger in any way, shape or form. Now I wanted to hear John sing and we would be good to go.

The last proper song on the album was, of course, the absolute masterpiece (or as Sirius liked to call it, ‘an utter fucking bop’) that was ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’. Considering the sheer amount of times we’ve listened to the record since it came out, it wasn’t all that surprising that we knew all the words off by heart. This was including playing all five minutes and fifty-five seconds of it while James was in the shower, so he didn’t spend hours in there and use up all the hot water. The rule was that he had to be out by the time the song had ended, or we would send Lily the picture we had of him with his hair all wet. And he would die before he consented to such a thing. Trust me, it’s not a particularly flattering look on him. I had to remind them to resist the urge to jump around when the rock bit came on, you know what I’m on about, so as to not damage the vinyl already.

The last track was a guitar rendition of ‘God Save The Queen’, which was outrageous as it was excessive. Just layers upon layers of guitar, I would forever be impressed by Brian’s skills. Sirius, however, was still moaning over his restricted movement.

“But why can’t we jump? It’s so much more fun that headbanging alone,” Sirius whined like the petulant child that he was. I had to give him at least some credit, he may have an impressive amount of muggle knowledge, but he was still a pureblood and a Black at that. He could be so naïve sometimes.

“Darling you have to understand that it’s a sensitive little thing. If you jump, so will the vinyl, which will scratch it and it will jump at awkward times,” I explained, to which I was met with blank stares as if I was speaking in bloody Welsh. I sighed, perhaps a little more dramatically than necessary but if that doesn’t some up my whole life then I don’t know what does, and tried again, “Like with my Sheer Heart Attack record? Where it jumps during Brighton Rock and Killer Queen?”

“Ohhhh,” understanding washed over his and James’s faces because let’s be honest, if you think Sirius is oblivious then clearly, you’ve never met James.

“Yes, ohhhh,” I repeated, taking the mick out of the stupid buggers. Hey, it’s my birthday, I’m allowed to do whatever I want.

Which reminded me of the party I had planned for later. Well, I say party, it was going to be more of a ball than anything. A birthday ball, if you will. What can I say, I have a flair for the dramatics, sue me.

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egdocument · 5 years

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About the EvaGeeks wiki and why you shouldn't trust it, concerning mainly one user.

On the subject of EvaGeeks: Let’s talk about the manipulation of information on the wiki, and perpetuated “nastiness” on the forums that has persisted for several years now. THIS IS A MIRROR OF THIS GOOGLE DOCS FILE. (My twitter post.) You can share this post or the original document freely, use parts of it, etc. I want this document to simply serve as a warning to new Eva fans and those less familiar with EvaGeeks and their history - as well as an update for people who haven’t seen the current state of it.

NOTE: If you can’t read any of these images, these are Imgur albums containing all of the notable ones: https://imgur.com/a/z2mGvvX https://imgur.com/a/oAgufc3

The intent of this document is not to “take down” the wiki or forum, obviously. The intent is simply to inform people of the dangers of trusting this site with their Eva info. It might be the best we have but that doesn’t mean we can’t improve it. I would actually love to see a more community cultivated version of the site with less biased information, but I fear that will never happen. The anxieties of any one (or many) individual(s), which have prevented consistent change until now are well justified, and it is not within reason to blame the outsiders for never bothering to correct the myriad of issues with the wiki. Please extend kindness to other Eva fans and approach sites like EvaGeeks with the appropriate scrutiny, if you aren’t already. We’re divided enough as it is.

Before I begin, I must state: All of the information presented is publicly available, either through main pages, chat logs or history. And yes, the link to join the Discord server and verify the information given in this is publicly available too. I will not link it myself, as I want to avoid any possible harassment of the users I speak about here. Harassment is NEVER the answer in any kind of conflict. This behaviour I don’t believe can go unchecked, but that doesn’t mean the consequences of it should be any kind of conflict towards any user. I will be naming them here so you are aware, but I really do have to advise you, as a reminder, DO NOT HARASS OR ENGAGE WITH THEM. The rule of thumb is that these issues are more systematic than you might think, and blaming or taking it out on a singular person or even a whole group is never justified. Targeted harassment, even with reason, especially never helps to remedy an issue, because it forces the person to double down on their behaviour and beliefs. Causing unnecessary pain to a person is never okay, and the ‘offences’ committed here aren’t deserving of it in the first place. Please also consider the feelings of the people who use the server and EvaGeeks site; not everyone is your "enemy" or your "target" (and frankly, no-one should be) and despite the feelings echoed in this document, EG is not a monolith of a singular opinion or belief.

The purpose of this document is to inform people of the ways EvaGeeks fails objectivity and has existed to push narratives and exclude outsiders for far too long. With new people coming into the Eva fandom (and there of course being others who have been around for quite a while but just aren't aware) I feel like now is the best time I could write this.

As for what prompted this, an anonymous member of the Discord server contacted me regarding the behaviour of one particular user they were concerned about. Said user had expressed considerable bias in the past and was admitting to making large edits to pages on the wiki very recently, and the person who contacted me felt unequipped to bring the issue to light themselves.

A decent amount of this document will be dedicated to presenting said user's contributions - while I feel someone always had to address the EvaGeeks Problem at large, it doesn't help that this user has essentially incriminated himself here to expose the problem in its entirety.

There is quite a bit of pretense I must discuss before I get into the subject of the wiki pages themselves. I suggest you read all of it; the start of the wiki section will be in heading text if you’d like to skip to it. I’m sure information on the biased editing of wiki pages is privy to anyone who has used the server or the site itself, but at the server’s current status of 60 entire members, I know not everyone has, or is aware of what the problem actually is. Please note that the person who contacted me has requested anonymity and I will be complying. I will not include screenshots of their conversation with me, and anything I quote from them will be paraphrased so nobody can go full Sherlock and analyse their typing patterns. It sounds silly and it’s probably just paranoia, but they shared my concern here. Any conflict we can prevent is for the best. EvaGeeks, of course, has a culture very much promoting the idea that it’s the “number 1 source for all things Eva”, and for English speaking fans it definitely is - you’d be surprised the amount of people who still, after all these years, think this site is consistently reputable. For the sake of context, I’m going to assume that you are not all that familiar with the site’s history or nature, so I’m going to provide a little bit of information about it for those without any first-hand experience. The forums in particular cultivate a very join-us-or-get-out type community, where those who dare to go against the grain get incentivised to leave the site; they’ll claim this isn’t the case if asked and obviously the site is NOT a hivemind but that doesn’t mean it’s not insular. I can vouch for myself and many others who refuse to go in more than a few threads for fear of discussion turning particularly nasty. Even the server member who came to me about this has stated they feel it “might not be a hivemind but it sure feels that way.” Silencing dissent, even when officially-backed, is part of their culture. You don’t have to personally harass everyone who has an opposing thought to you for it to not feel acceptable, you just need to have a history of mocking those who do. If you want some previous, notable cases of “discussion turning nasty”, here’s some off the top of my head: 1. The AWL Incident - In which ADV VA of Rei and director of EoE dub, Amanda Winn-Lee, joined the forums for discussion and was promptly harassed by a user. Most of these messages have been deleted but you can view what remains of her post history here. 2. Recently brought to my attention: upon beginning translation of the Episode 24 drafts, EG forum user LiLi was subjected to incentive to leave, mostly in the form of homophobic disgust in replies to her thread or others they were mentioned in. Any information that goes against the cultivated narrative, even when it is literally officially licensed content, is only ever considered with a degree of reluctance. The fact these drafts co-exist with other pages concerned with this episode is almost a miracle. You can find plenty of repeat instances of the above if you want to (more to do with homophobia and misogyny than outward hostility, but honestly it’s the same thing.) A look at basically any EvaGeeks thread concerning pairings or the female characters will unearth a variety of awful comments from many other users, not that that would be surprising to anyone who has spent more than two minutes in the fandom. Now, of course, that’s very relevant to the topic at hand even if it doesn’t seem to be. The EG wiki and forum have quite a bit of overlap and circular influence on each other as you’ll see later if you aren’t already aware of it. For a short summary before we jump into things and analyse our subject of the day, this essentially means that anyone with an opinion or information the majority doesn’t like will never get in a position good enough to edit the wiki and keep the edits there. This has resulted in many articles filled with conjecture and fan speculation that serve to shut down other viewpoints, whether it’s intentional or not.

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ON THE TOPIC OF THE EVAGEEKS WIKI

The issue surrounding homophobia and downplaying of references to LGB content in Eva, through proxy of fan-dictated content control and translation is not a new one by any stretch of the imagination. I'm sure you're all very well aware. It’s far from the only issue present in the fandom but it will be our subject of conversation today. Any ‘one instance’ of this persistent behaviour from Eva fans is never going to be enough to summarise how insurmountable it really is, though, so today I instead draw your attention to one user of the wiki who goes by the name of FelipeFritschF and his recent, frequent updates to pages concerning Nagisa Kaworu.

[TOPIC: FELIPEFRITSCHF]

I must reiterate here: although this document is mostly concerned with this user and will contain a number of receipts from various places, it is NOT supposed to function as a hit piece or inspire any kind of mob. Leave this guy the hell alone, just be aware that he’s the one making most of these changes and isn’t a particularly impartial party, to put things lightly.

Now, before we really get into things, it should be stated that the EvaGeeks wiki requires approval to get your edits there, as stated at the bottom of the homepage, here:

This means that anyone making consistent edits to the wiki has in fact been approved, and this isn’t the result of lack of maintenance.

What you’ll find is that it is consistently Felipe making edits to the pages in question. Kaworu’s bio page, for example, is almost entirely edited by Felipe, which we can see from the “History” tab of the article.

This is barely half of his edits made in the last few days. Take a scroll through it yourself if you’re so inclined. This hilarious bit of waffle was added by Felipe a few days ago and since revised since by him, as shown here.

(As an added bit of comedy, the man who decided to add in the Japanese in the first place apparently didn’t know the difference between 好意 (kindness, what Kaworu actually says) and 行為 (action). It’s been fixed since but I still think it’s quite funny.) Now, as anyone with even a rudimentary knowledge of Japanese knows, 好き is not actually a very ambiguous word at all. I think it goes without saying, though, and I’m not here to have an argument about translations with you all (for the record, Kanemitsu’s now scarily infamous translation of this scene is perfectly fine with me in a vacuum, it’s just literally everything else surrounding it that’s the problem. Also, regretfully, I will have to speak about this nonsense later when it becomes relevant.) I’m using this as an example instead, to show how utterly ridiculous this guy’s additions to these pages are. He’s not even making a point here. It keeps going past this excerpt, and I suggest you read the whole thing (Kaworu’s page is linked above.) The point of bringing this up - and when I eventually discuss the Netflix translation when it’s necessary - is not to complain about semantics, although I’d argue that’s what’s happening in these articles, honestly. It’s just helpful when proving the actual point of the editor being incredibly unreliable and biased in how he phrases and omits things.

On the page dedicated solely to Shinji and Kaworu’s relationship (which is basically identical to their section on Kaworu’s page as far as I can tell), we can see that Felipe has also edited this several times, and even credits himself with expanding the version on the Evangelion Fandom Wiki now copy and pasted back to EvaGeeks.

The kind of “discussion” (very much not discussion when added to a wiki page supposedly presented as factual information, is it, frankly?) would be fine if it was happening in the EvaGeeks forum itself (and happen does it ever, but that doesn’t change the inappropriateness of this particular behaviour.) What I find disturbing is that in the past few days, this user has gone out of his way to make some already worrying articles even worse, presumably in an attempt to silence discourse, or add more fuel to the flames, surrounding the new Netflix translation. He has a whole page on that one, too, one which is very up-to-date in some regards and not at all in others, despite only being added a few days before me compiling this information. Frankly, going through this whole page on its own is a huge waste of my time considering how BLATANT it is in its biases, but I’ll do it anyway. It IS only a Theory and Analysis page (which is essentially an EvaGeeks free-for-all), but I think it’s quite bothering that the site even allows Theory and Analysis pages that consider only one viewpoint and are written by one person. The forum, presumably, is connected to the site for a reason.

I’m just going to link it here, for the sake of brevity. https://wiki.evageeks.org/Theory_and_Analysis:Kaworu%27s_lines_in_Episode_24 I suggest you read this before continuing. For a slight departure, the original theatrical Funimation dub of 3.0 is partially available for viewing online, although the audio is in cam quality so you may want headphones if you have plans to watch what’s there. The home media dub’s major changes are to issues with lore and localisation of jargon. While not directly mentioned in this article, it is implied from the subject that this is what it’s about; it’s been speculated that the very literal translation of Episode 24 in particular has come about due to Khara’s embarrassment with how Funimation’s theatrical dub of 3.0 handled Kaworu and Shinji’s relationship rather loosely. Despite these claims, every instance of the two sharing (honestly pretty awkward and unnecessary) flirtatious back-and-forths are still present in the home media version, barring an instance in the stargazing scene where Kaworu’s dialogue was translated even worse than it is in the final dub. If you don’t believe me, do the comparisons yourself. It may not be conclusive, but I think it puts mostly to death the rumour that “a Khara employee was there and saw how people laughed at the Kaworu and Shinji scenes and demanded it needed to be changed for the final release and now that’s being reflected on the new translation”, which is what it tends to boil down to.

It also goes without saying that NO ONE PERSON is “the most qualified” (holy shit, is this entry not even bothering to hide how biased it is) to translate an entire TV show, let alone something like Evangelion. Let us not forget that Kanemitsu’s claims that he respects “ambiguity” are not even true to begin with. EvaGeeks itself is a shining example of Eva fans, of which Kanemitsu is one and this is even discussed in the article, not being impartial enough to be tasked with discussing Evangelion! (There is obviously issue with citing the ADV translation as a source of all truth; if you read further into the thread on my tweet [the kitchen scene in EoE], I provide extra context for those interested, which I am aware has been spread around Discord and other places without that context included. Of course, I’m not an unbiased source either as you can probably tell from my tweets nor am I claiming to be, so please feel free to discuss these things in other places if you want. I’ve just got the tweets I have on hand here. Sorry about that.) Next, the repeat claim that this is “Khara’s licensed translation and thus the most accurate version” is pretty obviously nonsense; I’m sure I don’t need to point out to the audience that Japanese companies meddling in localisation has ended poorly in the past, or that Khara uses questionable translations from the dubs of the Rebuild films on licensed merch from time-to-time, or that the translation was fairly obviously not overseen or even QA’d by anyone following Kanemitsu’s translation work judging from the myriad of grammatical errors, missing subtitles and overly literal, poor sounding phrasing present in the final work. (Do I need to source this? Just watch the damn thing.) It’s not even like the ways it was translated have been consistent through different versions on Netflix; some were translated from Kanemitsu’s English to other languages judging from the obvious mistakes being present in multiple tracks, and some were barely even translated at all - the Italian version, the dub of which is mysteriously now missing, was so bad people were commenting that it sounded like Shakespeare or that it was translated word for word from Japanese. I dunno about you, the reader, but something about “Khara only bothered to check very rigorously the English version for their specific requests with the translation” doesn’t sound like what really happened to me. It’s more like they’ve just sent a translator they have worked with before to work on a project of theirs. Apologies for engaging in speculation, but that’s all this whole article is anyway. It’s just something I noticed from skimming through the page, but I find it quite interesting that Felipe makes a blanket statement about the excerpts from Schizo and Prano “being wrongly attributed to Anno” and then the source he provides for that is just someone on the EvaGeeks forums saying the same thing with little proper sourcing, when that was never really the intent of their post anyway. An interview summary exists where Anno has stated he wrote both books himself, and if you haven’t seen it, here it is. It’s obviously flimsy at best, but Tokyo Otaku Mode is an officially licensed Evangelion distributor. If Felipe is going to parade around his love for the Very Official Khara Subtitles Of NGE he can at least extend the same gratitude to other forms of official information; I mean, frankly, this article is about as reputable as anything in the Netflix subtitles are. Lastly, another thing I found quite interesting is his strange love for the ADV VHS subtitles. I really, really think this is obvious, but subtitles changed in later versions of the ADV release were changed because they were deemed incorrect. I don’t have sources for this so take it with an absolute grain of salt but I believe there’s even a commentary track on the Platinum release where the translator talks in depth about why she translated episode 24 as she did. It’s not exactly a better word than Kanemitsu’s, but if we’re considering translator’s word as law for whatever reason like Felipe is here, we might as well consider hers, too, right? Oh, and actually, have a look at the sources used on that article. Most of the sweeping statements he makes have absolutely no backing beyond what he’s piecing together from old and irrelevant interviews (when discussing the Netflix translation) as well as...linking Kanemitsu’s job history...I mean, sure, the guy is qualified, but do I really need to go over this again?

INTERMISSION: Speaking of sources, you might have noticed from perusing these articles yourself that EvaGeeks has a very low standard for sourcing to begin with, which is likely partially to blame for how things like these articles can even exist in their current forms in the first place. A site that doesn’t have such a lenient policy on sourcing, though, is Wikipedia. Felipe, of course, cannot stay within the confines of the fandom and has decided to have a go at providing some information to Kaworu’s actual Wikipedia page as well.

https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Kaworu_Nagisa&action=history Felipe is far less to blame for the state of Kaworu’s Wikipedia article, which is honestly pretty bad to begin with. There have been plenty of other people editing this one and the rather homophobic “Relationship with Shinji” part of the article has been present for a while before he started editing it. (The fact this article literally uses someone being explicitly homophobic as a source is not surprising for Eva fandom, but holy shit, am I disgusted every time I reopen this page. I'm not even going to bother figuring out who added that one.) I do wonder if his reasons for not desecrating this page the same way he has on EvaGeeks is because he knows it wouldn’t stay up for particularly long. Reminder that he is also the main editor of the same pages on the Evangelion Fandom Wiki, which is essentially a copy and paste of EvaGeeks. Of note is this little tidbit I found:

This is what Felipe then deleted, as this is apparently not relevant, despite literally being about Kaworu’s relationship with Shinji. I mean, I’m sure this could have been put in somewhere else and perhaps phrased a bit better, but why the hell would you outright delete that kind of information? It’s supposed to be a wiki, not your own personal opinion chamber. BTW, this is the thread post he links as a rebuttal to that person adding it, and it’s probably for the best it’s presented here with context: https://forum.evageeks.org/post/886380/NGE-Ep24-Script-First-and-Second-Drafts/#886380

He clearly thinks he has a point here, but I’m not sure what exactly he’s going for. Basically everything he’s saying is conjecture, and while I can kinda see where he’s coming from it sure does completely fail to address the intent as explained in this interview. “Read the whole interview” is very dismissive, especially when the interview in full doesn’t exactly contradict the initial point. It does say quite a bit, how he will disregard official information when his wiki articles themselves are full of nothing but rambling.

Here’s another relevant and quite funny Discord screenshot:

Felipe is making a pretty hypocritical statement here. I’m sure he does have a point - there’s probably been quite a bit of vandalism happening to these pages which isn’t exactly surprising (again, Eva fans are not often rational people, please be honest with ourselves). That being said, I think there’s a particular irony to the man who has written many very, very long paragraphs on the wiki pages he has control over trying to stop people from thinking there might be anything but “ambiguity” between a pair he doesn’t like.

In the case anyone reading has forgotten: the purpose of a wiki should be to provide unbiased information on the material it discusses. Obviously the repeating of “innocuous” statements about how “ambiguous” it all is, in the vain of EG’s now made fun of ‘we don’t know what he really meant by that’ and ‘why Kaworu is so intent for Shinji alone to have happiness remains a mystery’ are pretty obviously intended to downplay the very, very obvious “subtext” and leagues of official information provided.

It kinda goes without saying that WE CAN INFER THESE THINGS FROM THE ACTUAL INFORMATION ON THE WIKI, you don’t need to add a disclaimer to everything going “well we just don’t know what it means!” (even in instances when we do know what it means, but that’s almost besides the point). You don’t need to add in these statements, unless you’re trying to sway people into ignoring what's presented by the show. If you want people to draw their own conclusions, you are in fact capable of presenting information without commentary - in fact, that's kind of the whole point of a wiki. Yes, Eva is ambiguous at times, but talking down to people like they need this reminded to them constantly is an absolute waste of time and energy. It’s almost as if the editor has been trying to cultivate a narrative and has been getting away with it because you can’t really prove these statements are biased unless you do the research. (I mean, you can from context, but it certainly hasn’t done much to get them removed, has it?)

You can view the editing history of any given EvaGeeks article on their own pages if you want to see just how many times these things have been added in by Felipe. And obviously, no, it isn’t just his fault - there are other users, several, in fact, credited with the editing of these pages, many of the edits serving the same point as Felipe’s paragraphs on “ambiguity”. He’s just the most concrete example of a biased editor. Also, yes, I do recognise this has all happened within the few days post the release of Eva on Netflix and that it was likely prompted by that. But we know at least one of the mods is aware of it given how Felipe talks about it in the EvaGeeks Discord server. It’s also quite funny I’ve seen people linking these pages like they're some kind of "gotcha" in response to tweets discussing the new translation, as if they haven’t been invented out of thin air in the past few days.

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Now, frankly I’m sick of staring at EvaGeeks, and if you want any more information on these articles and others with instances of the same thing happening, you can have a look at it yourself.

Originally, this document contained far more screenshots from Felipe. My desire for this to not turn into a hit piece has lead me to remove a great deal of these messages. I do suggest, if you want to, you join the server and make your own conclusions. Even beyond what the member told me about I found myself agreeing with him fairly frequently when he was being reasonable - this doesn't change my concerns regarding the presentation of information on the wiki, though. The anonymous member was mostly concerned about this user having basically all the control over Kaworu's wiki articles, seeing as he has far too high of a stake in everything. Not all of these messages are inflammatory or even necessarily bad or wrong, but I find that to anyone privy to the “revelations” about the EvaGeeks Wiki here, they paint an interesting story, to say the least.

It’s starting to sound like he perhaps has just had some bad experiences. The following few messages are part of the same conversation.

I find it interesting how he flipflops from not understanding anything about the whole Eva Parallelism Theory Thing to suddenly being all for it when it concerns things not about the gay stuff.

Comments on how ‘manipulative’ Kaworu is

Because Kaworu is very pro instrumentality, and this definitely isn’t just a theory, I mean, it’s even talked about on the wiki, guys! (And I’m not even touching on the yes-men in this server.) Oh.

Oh no.

For the record, this page is clearly still under construction, and to point out any one thing about how bad it is would be essentially just poking a stick at a beehive. At least this one is so absolutely poorly phrased it’s doubtful anyone could mistake it for any kind of proper information. I also find it incredibly funny whenever pages on the wiki use the forum as a source. Relevant: Qmisato’s post on his defending of Shinji sexually assaulting Asuka: https://qmisato.tumblr.com/post/183082754484/yesterday-i-was-invited-to-evageeks-official

In response much later. I really can’t see it as being framed as “fun teenage romance”, also why is the word romance suddenly being used to talk about Asuka and Shinji after the whole debacle with Kaworu? He’s said before he doesn’t see Asuka and Shinji’s relationship as romantic, either (and GOOD! It’s not!)

(Also - it’s not sexual assault when Shinji tries to kiss Asuka in her sleep, but it IS when Kaworu does the exact same thing to Shinji? Make up your mind, dude.) Turning this sort of thing into Shipping Discourse is frankly not the right way to go about it, but it is perhaps notable that despite what Felipe says, he is in fact an Asushin shipper. (I don’t feel the need to post all these images in the document as its cluttered enough as it is.) At this point it’s rather adhom and I feel irrelevant but I do think it’s relevant that through all of Eva fandom, those who have the most issue “understanding” (more like accepting, I suppose) LGB subtext, are those who also are really attached to a fairly morally grey het pairing themselves. Again, seriously, there’s nothing inherently wrong with any of this and assuming the worst of someone because of the pairings they like isn’t my intent here, it’s more that I find this pattern has always been prevalent and it’s bothering me I’m seeing it STILL in 2019. ESPECIALLY from a wiki editor who inserts so much of that into his work on the site.

You’re probably sick of reading all of this (and I’m getting sick of writing it), so I’ll wrap up the part on Felipe quickly: Yes, I just dedicated several pages to screenshots of mostly innocuous (when considered out of context) stuff one guy had to say. I feel more obsessive than I’d like to admit, and frankly I have no business with this person. We’ve spoken twice on EvaGeeks threads if you can even call it speaking. This task was given to me by a member of the community who was concerned about his behaviour but didn’t want to publicise it themself and I feel a little out of my depth here. I at least hope we can come to the conclusion I wanted to here, that I fear may have been lost in this whole great mess of language - no one person should have THIS much sway over the state of a wiki that’s supposed to be impartial, especially when they have not been quiet with their biases in the first place, and it is the failure of everyone involved in the maintaining of the wiki itself that this sort of behaviour has been allowed in the first place.

The guy can have whatever opinions and theories he wants, obviously. I don't give a shit; he's not even that bad compared to the grand majority of Eva fans to begin with. Don't think this document exists to "cancel" him or thoughtpolice, I truly, genuinely, do not care what is said inside this server anymore. It doesn't concern me. I mean, it's a fucking cartoon, for god's sake. This only becomes an issue when opinions are expressed on a wiki, for reasons I have reiterated many times now. EvaGeeks lacks the objectivity required to function as a wiki and I'm trying to make that clear.

[ON THE TOPIC OF THE EVAGEEKS WIKI AND COMMUNITY IN GENERAL] As for who can edit the wiki and what they’re allowed to say: As you can see from the nature of people’s posts in this thread, you’re given access to do very specific things, and although I haven’t bothered going through the process myself (as I find it would be quite redundant, trying to fix such an inherently broken system), I’m guessing it’s very easy to get your edits reversed if you post anything they don’t like. Take that as conjecture of my own.

I have it in decent faith that the approval process involves whoever of the mod team is there at the time coming to an agreement based on people’s applications. Obviously this is a decent idea for a system, and I’m sure there are legitimate reasons as to why EG has to be locked down as much as it is; judging from the state of other fanon wikis I’ve seen there’s likely to be a decent amount of vandalism, especially in a fandom as passionate as Eva’s is. However, I think it’s fair to say that the complete restriction of updating these pages to those approved by a mod team who, while I’m sure are very reasonable people overall, certain individuals of which have displayed concerning behaviour and biases of their own in the server during my brief look around. I won’t be naming anyone in particular from the mod team as I don’t feel like I need to add any more targets of shame to this already horrifically negative document, but I have gotten the general impression (in case it needed confirmation, following the remaining of these specific changes on the wiki) that some mods, not all, aren’t the most nonpartisan individuals themselves. I do happen to be decent acquaintances with at least one of them so, again, please don’t consider this a personal attack.

My concern here plainly is that I don’t think a group of mods who have routinely failed to prevent events like the ones mentioned earlier, nor seem to have much of an issue with the myriad of examples of people being openly homophobic and misogynistic on their own forum are really in the position to be choosing who of the Privelleged Few get to control the Eva meta-narrative here. As I was writing this, I was alerted to the state of the primary Japanese Evangelion wiki as a source of cross referencing for what these things can look like if done right. If you take a moment to browse it, even if you don’t speak any Japanese and have to use an automatic translator it should be very obvious how something like this differs greatly from EvaGeeks. Kaworu’s page, for a relevant example, doesn’t have present any of the nonsense statements about ambiguity or overwritten descriptions of everything. The wiki respects the reader’s intelligence enough to know that it is, in fact, a wiki, and thus tries its best to be factual. His page is fairly decent in size and states things we know are fact rather than theory. There’s no attempt made to influence or confuse.

Oh, and just in case you think the mods aren’t actually active or present enough to know what Felipe is doing, his particularly awful page on Kaworu in episode 24 got a shoutout from the official Twitter account two days ago.

If you are going to join the Discord server to verify things yourself* or do further digging, again, please be cautious of other users inside and do your best not to start anything. I am an occasional contributor to the forums and I’d prefer not to get my account flagged or to experience harassment myself, if any EvaGeeks members are still reading this document and disagree with my conclusions. I may not have posted much since I joined earlier this year, but despite everything I find the forums to be valuable for connecting with other fans and have enjoyed the positive feedback to my SIRP translation! Those who have spoken to me there have been very kind (including Felipe himself), and I must reiterate that this is not targeted at the whole site, or even at just Felipe. I simply believe there is more than enough evidence to suggest there have been consistent, systematic failures to recognise and correct the utter lack of objectivity present. I seriously don’t have any personal issues or beef with this guy, either. I wouldn’t have done this if it wasn’t someone else who came to me about it.

*It should be noted that the person who spoke to me has pointed out certain members have been concerned about outsiders joining and screenshotting the chat. They may remove the public link to join if this document were to cause a huge issue. I will leave the server following the publication of this document and I have no plans to join again. I can’t speak for those who may join of their own accord but I do hope people have heeded the disclaimer I made initially.

Thankyou to all the people who have extended their own kindness and support during the creation of this document, to the anonymous person who tipped me off and the lovely Eva analysts I know for offering their own experiences with EvaGeeks and further supplementary information. If this whole document reads like the product of a bad mental health day, I guess it is. Also yes I know how hilarious it is that I’ve spent all this time creating what essentially amounts to an EVAGEEKS CALLOUT POST but I mean. Someone had to say it. Why not make an utter buffoon of myself in the process?

#Mirroring this for the sake of people concerned with their privacy when accessing google docs #reading this back theres a lot of bad wording but whatever. itll do

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imyourliquor-youremypoison · 5 years

Text

Big Spook (Peter Parker x Reader - Part 3)

Synopsis: Aged Up!Peter thinks he’s done well with leading a double life. He’s studying what he likes, he has his own place, he’s dating the girl he loves… but that doesn’t mean life is easy all the time. Even superheroes have bad days - and sometimes worse days.

Tags: Aged Up!Character, College AU, Established relationship, Whump, Angst. Does not take FFH into account. SPOILER FREE.

Word count: 2.6k

Part 2 <<< >>> Part 4

MASTERLIST

When (Y/N) woke up – she couldn't remember when or how on earth she managed to fall asleep in this situation – she was lying on a couch in what she could only assume to be the Avengers' compound, a blanket draped over her, the blinds hiding the sun. It was about ten in the morning, and she quickly rubbed the sleep away from her eyes and threw the blanket away.

She had never even dreamed of stepping into this place, let alone spend the night. But she didn't have time to gush over being in the Stark Tower, because she knew Peter was somewhere on a lower floor, half dead.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y,” (Y/N) called, hoping she worked the same as E.D.I.T.H and thanking heaven that Peter was a huge nerd who had gushed over his glasses for ages when she asked him about them.

“Miss (Y/N),” the A.I. Greeted her, waiting for her to speak.

“I need to see Peter,” she said, a stone dropping to the bottom of her stomach as she said his name. Let him be alive, let him be alive.

“Right this way, Miss.”

The panels of a seemingly normal looking wall moved to reveal an elevator and dinged when the doors opened. She stepped in and the doors closed on their own, F.R.I.D.A.Y taking care of letting her off on the right floor.

She ran out as soon as the doors opened again, and she recognized the white walls of the medical wing. Thanks to muscle memory only, (Y/N) found her way back to the surgery room Peter had been brought in, but the sign next to the door said it was currently empty.

Going back, the looked at the sign on every door, trying to find someone, anyone, who could point her in the right direction.

“(Y/N),” an all too familiar voice called her name, cutting short to her increasing panic. When she turned around, she saw a puffy-eyed May Parker standing by a door down the corridor. “He's here.”

She jogged over to her and the two women crashed into each other for a tight hug. (Y/N) heard May cry softly, but she found she could no longer shed a tear. She had cried so much yesterday, and the shock of it all finally hit her, numbing her to everything around her. She needed to see Peter.

“He'll be okay, he'll be fine,” May whispered against her head, placing a kiss on top of it. (Y/N) knew she said it for herself, she tried to speak it into existence.

“Happy called you?” (Y/N) croaked out, clearing her throat.

“As soon as you passed out,” she said with a nod, gently stroking her hair. May always showed her maternal love, and (Y/N) often wondered why she had never had kids of her own. “We're waiting for Dr Cho to tell us what's going on.”

When (Y/N) looked over May's shoulder, she saw Happy standing beside a bed, where she knew Peter laid, though she could only see the shape of his legs under the white sheets. May quickly filled her in on what she missed and told her he came out of surgery around six this morning. Dr Cho went to sleep, having earned her rest and left Peter in the capable hands of the nurses.

The three of them waited inside Peter's room, silently watching his chest rise and fall and finding comfort in that, and that alone. Because they didn't know anything else. Most of Peter's body was hidden under the sheets, but what little they could see was not reassuring at all. Half his face was bandaged up, because of the head wound (Y/N) had nearly lost her mind over, and he had obviously gotten several stitches for other open wounds on his upper body. That was without mentioning the purple bruises littering his arms, or the split lip, the small gash on his left eyebrow, or the swollen black eye.

There was a growing emptiness in the pit of (Y/N)'s stomach, and she was afraid it would consume her like a black hole. May squeezed her hand when Dr Cho entered, holding a pad in her hand with a few papers on it, startling (Y/N) out of her daydream.

“Let me put your worries to rest,” the doctor started, walking around the bed and taking a small flashlight out of her pocket to inspect Peter's eyes. “The surgery went well, I was able to stop the bleeding and stitch him up without causing any brain damage, and his vitals are good.”

Happy stood beside May now, and (Y/N) drank in Dr Cho's every word.

“That said, he sustained a great number of superficial wounds all over his body, and it will take time to heal, superpowers or not. It's difficult to assess the full extent of the damage his head wound has done since he hasn't woken up. This is the bad news: Peter has fallen into a coma.”

Her face became serious, and she stopped her examination of Peter to look each of them in the eye, meeting their distressed gazes with a neutral face.

“A coma?” May croaked out. (Y/N) could tell by the sound of her voice that she was close to crying again, while she did not even feel the usual tingle behind her eyes.

“Yes. It's the body's natural response to the physical trauma,” she explained. “As long as he doesn't wake up, I cannot do anything else. I have treated every other wound. He’s lost of lot of blood,” Dr Cho said and paused, then looked at (Y/N). “We don’t know how long he stayed on your bathroom floor before you found him, but he was in severe condition when you brought him in, and his head wound must have sent him in shock.”

“How much blood?” (Y/N) squeaked out, feeling her throat tighten to the point of discomfort. It was her fault. If she hadn't fallen asleep...

“Enough,” was the only answer she got out of Dr Cho. “I’ve transfused him blood, so he should regain some colors very soon. He does also appear to have several shattered ribs and a broken cheekbone too, but there’s no internal damage, which is good.”

The list of bruised, cut, shattered and broken body parts Peter had made (Y/N) want to vomit all over again, and she hadn't even eaten or drunk anything in over sixteen hours.

“What can we do now?” Happy asked the doctor just as she was about to leave.

She stopped in her tracks and showed them the shadow of a smile – a sad one.

“It's out of ours hands now. Peter will wake up when he's ready.”

(Y/N)'s finger tailed along Peter's arm, following the veins running from his wrist to his elbow, lost in her contemplation. It felt like she hadn't moved in forever. She vaguely remembered Ned and Betty coming by to see Peter, but they didn't stay for most than a day – she thinks – because Peter wasn't technically family and they couldn't leave work on ground that a friend was in a coma.

God knew how long coma could last, no one could get off work for this long. (Y/N) saw them off – she thinks – and it was only her and May again. Happy came and went again, checking in whenever he had a chance, and making sure the psycho who had put Peter in this bed would get what he deserved.

(Y/N) didn't care. (Y/N) didn't care about anything. She barely found enough strength to look away from Peter, let alone care about other things. Sometimes she went to the bathroom attached to this room, and that was it.

May had to bring her food or she would forget to eat altogether. It had been days now, but (Y/N) couldn't tell how many because she hadn't moved, she hadn't slept properly, she hadn't watched the news since the first day.

She had been sitting still on a wooden chair next to Peter's bed, eyes fixated on the TV screen hanging on the wall across from the bed. She had clutched Peter's hand in hers, like she had been doing for the last few hours – she wasn't even sure she could move it anymore – while listening to the news.

They had gotten him. The criminal Peter had been chasing for days and days, they got him. The police found him tied to a lamp post, covered in blood that wasn't his, and knocked unconscious on the same night Peter came back half dead. (Y/N) had smiled when she heard the anchorwoman say that he had been arrested, she had turned towards Peter to celebrate the news, but reality had hit her like a ton of bricks.

Peter wouldn't be celebrating his latest arrest any time soon.

Feeling ill again, (Y/N) had turned off the TV and unplugged it, for good measure, and since then, the hours spent in Peter's room had been silent for all of them. May didn't sleep here but she came in the morning and left late at night. She brought yarn with her and knitted, or a book to read, or pictures to look at. She had tried to show (Y/N) the album she brought on the fourth day, but (Y/N) merely stared blankly at the pages, as if she couldn't see the pictures at all.

May hadn't tried to gain (Y/N)'s attention anymore after that, she merely made sure she was fed and got some sleep. She slipped a sleeping pill in (Y/N)'s coffee on the fifth day because the girl looked a fright! She hadn't had any shut eye in days and her eyes were dry and red because she stared at Peter all day long, wordlessly urging him to wake up. He needed to wake up.

On the seventh day, May saw a change in (Y/N)'s behavior. It was as though she received an electric shock – or perhaps the lack of food and sleep was getting to her finally. She stood up, and took her phone, and she spent the day answering all the worried text messages she and Peter had received since he came here, she also called their faculty and internship supervisors to keep them updated.

“Yes, yes I know,” she said in her phone, her back turned to May.

Her voice sounded fake, it was a customer service voice, May noted, eyes darting from her knit-work to the young woman's back. She knew (Y/N) was on the brick of insanity, she was driving herself mad with worry and her health suffered from it too. She bore dark circles under her eyes and her cheeks were hollow.

“I'm sorry about that, I know I should have called but I barely leave the hospital room,” she sighed in the phone, clearly arguing with her supervisor about her prolonged absence from work. “I'll come back as soon as I can, and I will catch up on my work. No, I-”

May waited, curious to see what she was going to say to this person who so clearly had no idea what (Y/N) currently endured.

“Well I'm sorry if it's an inconvienience to you, but like I said, I will not be able to come back to work as long as my fiancé hasn't recovered from his accident. What's so hard to understand? Would you go to work if your wife's life was in danger?!” (Y/N) shouted in the phone, holding it away from her ear and simply yelling the words to the screen. “Have a good day!” she snapped before ending the call.

May's eye slit up and she stood up, leaving aside her knit-work.

“Honey, don't let it get to you,” she went and took (Y/N) into her open arms, rubbing her back when the young woman buried her head in the crook of her neck. “Everything will work out, you'll see. Peter wouldn't want us to lose hope so soon. We have to believe he will wake up.”

“I know, I know this,” (Y/N) hiccuped. “But it's so hard. I don't know how much longer I can do this- I- I feel like I'm holding my breath, and I just- I can't breathe, May. I can't- I can't breathe.”

(Y/N) was slowly crumpling down, her breathing becoming uneven and sharp. May recognized a panic attack when she saw one and held (Y/N) in her arms, lulling her gently and whispered reassuring words into her ears while she gave in to the daunting sadness crushing her heart. A dam broke inside her, and the tears began to flow again, and she cried and cried and hiccuped against May's flowery blouse, wishing her own mother was here with her.

“Shh”, May said in her ear. “It will be fine. I know my Peter, and I know he won't abandon you, he'll fight to come back to you,” she told her in a soothing voice before pulling away.

(Y/N) had calmed down a little, only silent tears ran down her cheeks but she had regained her breath and her body had stopped shaking. May tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“You need to go home, honey,” May told her, meeting stubborn refusal. “You haven't had a full night's sleep in a week now, you'll end up in a the hospital if you don't take care of yourself.”

The rational part of her brain knew that, but how could she leave Peter? How could she leave her boyfriend alone in this sterile place, between these lifeless white walls while she was in their home?

“Oh, please don't cry anymore.” May pulled her in again and wrapped her arms around her. “He'd hate for you to torture yourself like this. You know it's not your fault. The one responsible has been arrested and will answer for his crimes.”

“It is. It is my fault. I should have stayed awake, then I would have been there when he needed me. Instead I let him bleed out on the floor, like a- like a-” a hiccup again, and she burst into tears once more.

“No, no, you can't think like that. You just fell asleep, it happens! No one could have predicted what happened that night. Peter leads a dangerous life, and you have nothing to do with this.”

There was no point in arguing. (Y/N) knew she was at least partly responsible for Peter's current state. If she had woken up a little sooner, maybe...

“Please, just go home. Have a bath, go to sleep, eat a real meal,” May urged her. “If anything new happens, I'll call you right away, I promise you. But in the meantime, do not come again until you've had at least ten hours of sleep. You need to rest.” She tucked another wayward strand of hair behind (Y/N)'s ear, who, like an obedient little robot, nodded.

She took her jacket that she's threw on over her sweats the day Happy brought them here, and was about to leave when May spoke up once more.

“Oh, and honey!” she called her. (Y/N) turned around and saw her smile. “I'm so happy for you two. Peter finally proposed, huh? I know he was waiting for the right time to ask you, I'm glad you said yes.”

Swallowing thickly, (Y/N) tried to reciprocated the smile, but quickly turned around to leave, before May could see the horror on her face.

A/N: This is by far the angstiest piece I’ve ever written. *Pokes my readers with a stick* y’all still alive? How ya holding up? Hang in there

TAGLIST: @palindrome-teddy @complete-trash-101 @keeperofhopesanddreams @i-love-whumperflies @golden-guide @marauderette130

Comment if you wanna be tagged in part 4 :)

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anneliesemalin-blog · 5 years

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Issues Converting WAV To ALAC By A Batch Job

How to convert converting alac to wav linux to WAV online with ALAC to WAV Converter? Numerous articles on DSD spend a great deal of time going into the history - one we learn recently even starts things back at the invention of the phonograph, which is eyebrow-elevating, to say the least. This is what you have to know about how DSD was made. A while back, Sony and Phillips needed to start out experimenting with larger-quality audio formats, and DSD was what they got here up with. There. Brief and candy. Obviously there's a bit extra to it than that, and you'll dive into this text which explains it - it is a but much for our functions here. Bitrate: alac to wav converter free The bitrate of a digital audio file is generally expressed in kilobits per second (kbps). With compressed audio, high bitrates translate to higher-sounding files. However files converted at larger bitrates are bigger (when it comes to onerous disk house) than decrease-bitrate recordsdata. If storage is a matter, as it nearly at all times is with standalone playback gadgets equivalent to smartphones or iPods, then the problem is to determine on a bitrate that strikes the very best stability between measurement and quality.

PCM audio encoded in 24-bit WAV format. Valid for local information and community streams. For lossless 16-bit input streams (FLAC and ALAC), the audio samples are extended to 24 bits by padding each sample with zeros. For lossy input streams (AAC and MP3), a floating-level conversion is carried out with full 24-bit precision. If the input kind is not flac or if the output kind is followed by a semicolon, a stream converter program is required. There is no such thing as a transcoding export engine in rekordbox, such a feature would only lengthen the export process, and whereas I perceive that you'd love to simply click on-and-export to a universal format, sadly there are also further technical hurdles which can remodel your nicely aligned cue points and grids to your FLAC file to barely totally different locations on an MP3. Personally, I would reasonably Pioneer DJ not embody a feature that made issues worse by trying to make them better. Yes, it is extra time consuming for you to create a second version of that file, then verify the beat grid, create your sizzling cues, memory points and so on. once more, but if it means they'll be correct, it could be value it. One other bonus function is that you may obtain the HAP music transfer app to your LAPTOP to sync and duplicate all your tracks onto the HAP-Z1ES over Wi-Fi. The following time you download a new track or album from Excessive-Decision Music services such as HDtracks or Qobuz, it'll routinely be transferred. If you would like to download high-decision music to your LAPTOP or Mac, you will need to explore apps like JRiver Media Center, BitPerfect and Audirvana Plus. When you have a large music library (each CDs and High-Resolution Music files), the HAP Music Switch app is simple to incorporate into your present system. Sure, FLAC has the complete audio source, and from a strictly technical perspective, is qualitatively superior to even a 320Kbps MP3. However, anyone claiming to be able to consistently tell the difference between the two accurately in a true blind check is simply lying. A correctly encoded 256Kbps MP3 or AAC is just about indistinguishable from its FLAC counterpart in a better vs. worse" sense even with excellent audio equipment. Individuals discuss hearing cymbals and dense" music more authentically via FLAC as a result of simply they're on the lookout for a justification for his or her beliefs.

20180501: UPDATES INCOMING!Late final 12 months, I recorded new audio for mp3 and flac to reflect mp3's new authorized standing and flac's now-ubiquity. I've additionally added "WebMv2", which is justwebm audio with the opus codec as an alternative of vorbis. (The original WebM specification was vorbis-only. Opus is now additionally a permitted codec in webm.).The most recent top quality music streaming service to launch is Tidal. What makes the service significant is that it is partnered with 16 audio hardware manufacturers to ensure its platform is as accessible as potential from the get go. These include Sonos, HEOS by Denon, Bluesound, NAD and Meridian. With a launch catalogue of 25 million-plus tracks, Tidal clearly intends to make an enormous splash.MediaHuman Audio Converter is good. It's so good to find really well developed software - so intuitive and subsequently a pleasure to make use of. I have been taking a look at audio converters for a while now and not found anything that comes even near your great product. I've been involved in software program development all my life and rarely see software program that gets the person's experience 'just right' Audio Converter does exactly that. Congratulations.A When ripping your CD library, it is vital to choose the most effective storage format to preserve your music collection's original high quality. To the audiophile market and to a lesser extent for some music lovers, digital music has a fairly bad name. This is because of historically low bit-rates in lossy client music codecs like MP3 or AAC (a lossy compression format is one which completely removes among the file's information; in some cases it would take away more knowledge than it leaves behind). In the present day, increased bit-rate MP3 and AACs are much better than they have been.

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4birds-of-a-feather · 6 years

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Chapter 26 - Man, it doesn’t show signs of stoppin’ [part 3]

Birds Of a Feather

(In the previous chapters: Layla’s stuck at SeaTac and gives a call to WC Boyfriend who, once more, confirms to be the shittiest boyfriend ever; in the meantime, Sara has reunited with her long-lost cat and an acquaintance of her family, but it wasn’t all peaches and dandelions. WARNING: the other super-short update – we know that we had promised you to update sooner, but we were busy with our job, studies and festivities – just in time to wish you a fantastic 2018!)

Sara walked upstairs back to the loft, frantically rummaging in her shoulder bag to find the apartment keys. When she arrived on the landing, she jumped. “Fuck, mr. California! You scared the shit out of me!” the girl angrily shouted, almost dropping her headphones “The fuck are you doin’ out here???” The singer was in fact sitting on the floor, next to the front door – notebook and pen in his lap. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to…” he quickly grabbed the objects and hid them behind his back “It’s just that I went for a walk but forgot my keys on the table, and Jeff’s gone to a party, so…” “No problem: Layla left me hers” she made the keys clink under Eddie’s nose, so the singer smiled and stood up while she made the lock spring open. When they went inside, Sara stopped in the hallway to hang her coat, scarf and bonnet, while Eddie was looking at her, scratching his nape. “Weren’t… weren’t you supposed to spend this day with your family?” he finally asked, almost startling her. The girl gulped, rubbed her blubber eyes and put on a rather convincing cheerful voice, trying not to let him notice her real attitude. “Oh, yes, it’s just-I went to my parents’ house and I noticed that my mom’s relatives from Portland were there too… They’re annoying and know-it-all and kind of churchy too… <Why in hell did I mention Portland? Fuckin’ A, Fancini! Congrats!> … So I just drew the attention of my dad, without making the others notice me, and I explained him that I couldn’t tolerate ‘em, so he agreed and made up some persuasive excuse too… I guess my mum will understand, even if they’re her siblings and shit like that” she ended her monologue and finished to hang all her things, while Eddie was still looking at her. “So… this means you survived” he gave her a warm smile and she did the same. “Yeah, I guess so… Man, I fuckin’ hate these festivities! Hypocrisy flows in torrents” “Don’t tell me… The fuckin’ triumph of bleeding hearts, ugh” the singer soon joined her in that anti-Christmas rant and the two of them quickly ended bursting into laughter. “Glad to see another cynical and black soul around here – the world is too full of retarded Santa’s little helpers” “Man, I hate those lil’ fuckers!” Eddie laughed again, then his eye fell upon a packet full of ribbons that was under the Christmas tree – Sara’s gaze followed his own one. “Oh, you noticed Layla’s work of art…” “… How the fuck does she know that yesterday was my birthday?!” he finally exclaimed, making the girl look at him in disbelief. “Wait a minute: yesterday was your birthday?!” “… SHIT” “Why the fuck didn’t you tell us, Eddie??? You really are grown up in the woods, for fuck’s sake!” Sara scolded him, her eyes plopping out of her head. “I don’t know… I just didn’t want to bother, that’s all” he shrugged, not knowing what else to say. “… you really are weird” the girl sighed, shaking her head “Anyway, that’s your Christmas present… Layla always remembers this kind of things so, in your shoes, I wouldn’t be bothered…” “Didn’t she buy you anything?” Ed asked her, noticing that his pack was the only one under the Christmas tree. “Who do you think you’re talkin’ to??? Of course she bought me something, I’m her fuckin’ best friend!” she gave him a little slap in the nape “But I’ve already hidden it… ya know, with that animal of Ament that freely scampers in this loft, you’ll never know what he could do to my wealth” The guy laughed again “I think I’ll take the risk – I’ll leave mine here” “As you wish, mr. California – I won’t be the one who’s gonna stop you… don’t say I didn’t warn ya” He nodded and started to go in his room’s direction, then stopped and looked at her. “I guess I’m goin’ in my room to listen to some records… Wanna join me?” Sara winced a little, but quickly regained her usual aplomb. “Yeah, why not?” she shrugged “Just gimme a minute and I’ll come” “Ok, great – I’ll leave the door open, no need to knock” The girl nodded and made her way to the bathroom, while he stood in the hallway a few other seconds; when he saw the ringlets at the end of her ponytail disappear, he finally went in his bedroom.

<Nothing happened – you’re perfectly capable to have a natural conversation without embarrassing yourself… you’re gonna fuckin’ own this, you’ll see> Sara splashed her face, then looked at her tired reflection in the mirror: she could still spot some glitter but decided that her cheeks had already been rubbed enough – oh, and her face was the embodiment of misery. <I’m gonna be fuckin’ owned, ugh – this motivational bullshit is pathetic> She took a deep breath and made her way to Ed’s room, stopping just outside: Quadrophenia had just started playing when she peeped out from the doorjamb. “Am I still welcome?” Eddie raised his eyes from the books he was browsing and gave her a smile. “Always – come in!” he went to close the door and gestured for her to find a place to sit; she decided to take a seat on the floor, near the bookshelf where he was standing before. Soon after the guy approached her, waving something with a playful grin: “What did I tell you? Here, see for yourself” He handed her the infamous Polaroid he had taken with Joe Strummer and the girl sneered. “Since a month has almost passed, I thought you had made the whole story up…” she provoked him, without tearing her gaze from Strummer’s autograph at the bottom of the picture. “Yeah, in fact this photo is false as the fact that in 1977 I saw Springsteen and the E Street Band…” he casually added, going to sit next to her. “… you did what???” “… and I also saw The Who in 1979, when I was almost fifteen years old” “YOU LUCKY BASTARD!” Sara kicked him, making him laugh. “Why, are you telling me you never went to a concert?” Eddie mocked her with an evil smile. “Yeah, in fact Fleetwood Mac in 1980, Cat Stevens in 1976 or Led Zeppelin in 1977 were just hallucinations” “HOLY SHIT!” the guy exclaimed, surprised “Wait a minute, Cat Stevens in 1976? How old were-” “Eight years old, and he played divinely” she smiled again “Anyway, I won’t be jealous about you seeing The Who – Moon The Loon was already underground, I can tolerate it” “Shit, you were just a child! And Zeppelin at nine years old – I’m not surprised you turned out like this” Eddie spoke again, then laughed for her second statement. Soon after The Real Me began to play and Sara’s smile turned into a big grin. “The Ox is fuckin’ awesome here – I mean, I can totally say that he’s my favorite bass player without any doubt” “You love Quadrophenia too?” Eddie’s eyes lit up at the thought of a fellow fan of The Who. “Well, that’s not my favorite album made by them, but my second favorite song that they composed is here, so I guess I have to give it some credit” “Just spit out the title” “Love, Reign O’er Me, obviously” “I knew it – sooo, this means that your favorite album’s Tommy…” “Nope – Who’s Next” she gave him a mischievous grin “My favorite song is there, guess it!” The guy mentally listed the tracklist, then answered: “The Song Is Over, right?” “… you’re starting to impress me, ya know?” Sara mocked him, and he laughed. “Sooooo” after a while Ed cleared his throat “what are our plans for Christmas’ Eve?” “Well, since our beloved chef’s not here… I guess we’re fucked, mr. Surfin’ U.S.A.” “Nope, listen: food problem will be solved with pizza delivery… but what about after dinner?” “Why are you lookin’ at me as if I were the life and soul of all parties?!” “Hmm, maybe we could go out and drink somethin’…” he ignored her and went on with his suggestions. “… so then we would be surrounded by stupid people with their fuckin’ stupid Santa Claus hats or Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer antlers?! No, thank you!” “Or we could reach Jeff at the party he went to…” “You really want a Seattle remake of Silent Night, Deadly Night, don’t ya?” The guy laughed again, then raised his hands in order to declare himself innocent: “Oook, I get it! How about stayin’ at home and watchin’ some old movie provided by yours truly?” “Are you really makin’ me responsible for our pre-Christmas entertainment?” “C’mon, don’t be too modest! I liked Neighbors and I’m sure-” “Of course you liked it, I kept tellin’ you that you’re Belushi’s alter-ego!” Sara interrupted him, while he stuck his tongue out. “… I was telling ya that I liked Neighbors and I’m sure you’ll do a great job this evening too, that’s all” “… Whatevs” “Great! An Italian one, please” “What? Don’t tell me you’ve ever watched one of them!” “Yep, Miracle in Milan” “NO FUCKIN’ WAY!” the girl exclaimed, sincerely enthusiastic “D’ya know that its last scene inspired the E.T.’s one with the bicycles lifting into the air?” “Shit, that’s why I had a déjà vu when I first watched it!” “Sorry, I’ll stop immediately with my movie geek act – I know it’s weird, I just can’t help it” “No problem, I learnt something new” The girl gave him a grateful smile, then resumed her considerations: “Hmm, so you watched somethin’ from Neorealism… What about Commedia all’Italiana? Err, I mean, Italian-style comedy?” she quickly corrected herself, while Ed smiled because of those few Italian words. “Yeah, why not? I mean, Neorealism is great, but I’d like somethin’ lighter” “Well, ‘lighter’ is not the word I’d use to describe I Mostri, but it’s an awesome example of how great satire could be” “I’m in your hands, I’m sure you won’t disappoint me” Eddie cracked another smile “Dubbed?” “In your fuckin’ dreams, Vedder! I’ve got the subtitled version, this is no place for heretics!” “Yeah, I thought so… I also bet that on March you showed off the Italian flag when Cinema Paradiso won the Academy Award, am I right?” “… you almost got it” was her embarrassed answer, while the guy laughed and stood up to put his notebook in a drawer. “That’s your holy Bible full of personal lyrics, huh?” she asked him, and he immediately turned to face her, as if he had just received a punch in the face “Because that’s what your songs are… Autobiographic, like a diary” Eddie didn’t say anything and lowered his head, and soon Sara was forced to interrupt that awkward silence. “I’m-I’m sorry – I didn’t mean to sound like a bitch but, well!, apparently that was the final result…” she wrung her hands “Man, I really suck with social interactions” “It’s ok, don’t worry” the guy finally opened his mouth again and went to sit on the floor, next to her. “Did all that stuff happen to you?” she asked, after a while. “Except for the incest, yeah… I have lacked for nothing” “… shit” she took a deep breath, trying to clear her thoughts “I’m-I’m so sorry, Ed” “Yeah, I know you really mean it” he said in a low voice, then brought his knees to the chest. “Would my humble singing your praises make you feel a little better?” “Why, did you really like the songs or are you just givin’ me a lump of sugar?” he abruptly raised his head and shot her a nasty glance. “Fuck, do I really look like a person who gives compliments away?!” she retorted, starting to get worked up. “Are we really assembling a conversation by using only questions?” he went on, finally being able to chuckle, while the girl soon followed him – she mentally thanked him for making both of them a bit more relaxed than before. “Anyway – yes, I really liked ‘em, I think you’re a worthy lyricist… At least, the few times I can understand what the fuck you’re singing” At those words the guy laughed heartily and gave her a playful push, to which she answered with another one, a bit stronger. “But yeah, jokes aside: we can totally say that I’m in presence of talent” she winked at him and he thanked her, a bit embarrassed but pleased all the same. When Eddie resumed to talk, I’m One was playing in the background. “Oh, I was almost forgetting to tell ya that I really like your voice” Sara immediately froze, then slowly turned in his direction. “I beg your pardon, what did you just say?” “I said that I like your voice… I heard you, you sing pretty well” “WHEN DID YOU HEAR ME?!” “Well, a few days ago, when we hung out at that bar and-” “Holy Marvin Gaye, I knew that the whole karaoke thing was a shitty idea!” she facepalmed. “… but I heard ya yesterday too, while you were taking a shower” “Fuckin’ A, Vedder! Since when are you overhearing me?!” the girl asked him, her eyes almost plopped out of her head. “Err, since when you’ve started to sing Elton John out loud…?” “That’s because I thought I was alone! I thought that nobody was at home, except me! And instead you were there, lurkin’ like a vulture!” At that last comparison the singer laughed out loud, making Sara even more irritated. “C’mon, don’t be offended! I just wonder why you’re freakin’ out like that!” he tried to ease the situation, given how she didn’t seem to relax. “Because I don’t want anyone to know it, genius! I don’t like it, it’s just a personal thing” “… a personal thing?” “Yeah, a promise I made to someone – someone really important, but that was just a thing between the two of us” “Hmmm, understood” he thought over something, then resumed to talk “My father… he sang too. I mean, that’s what other people told me – I met him a few times, as a family friend, but I didn’t talk to him that much… And then one day my mum took me aside and told me that who I thought was my father was actually my step-father, and that my real dad was ‘that man that once in a while came to visit us, you remember?’ but he had already died, and I-I didn’t know what the fuck I was supposed to do, or say, or think, or feel, and-” Eddie stopped talking and took a deep breath, probably in the attempt to not cry, but Sara had already noticed his eyes becoming bright with tears. “It’s ok, Eddie, you don’t have to talk about it” she carefully put a hand on his shoulder and softly squeezed it, while he let out a deep sigh. <Am I the first one to hear his story? Well, who cares! I mean, he trusted me and told me all these things – maybe I should tell him about-> The girl’s thoughts were interrupted by the noise of a guitar’s sound box – Ed had grabbed the instrument and now was strumming it absent-mindedly, trying to tune it. “You play guitar?” “Yeah, a little bit… Well, playing is a huge word: let’s just say that I strum away on it” “Hmmm, I see” “You’re gonna make me listen to somethin’, right?” “What?!” she almost choked “Absolutely not – this is a categorical no!” “I’m sorry but I won’t accept refusals of any type” “… are you blackmailing me?” “Hmmm, maybe… you think I am?” “I think so, Alvin without the Chipmunks!” The guy laughed: “C’mon, just a song! It’s just the two of us – nobody will ever come to know this, I promise” Sara rolled her eyes, so Eddie went on: “Silence gives consent… fine, let’s do this!” He casually plucked some strings, then finally had a flash of inspiration and began to play. “I’m sure you know this one, I saw this album in your collection” “Great! Have you searched my bedroom too?!” she hysterically asked him, but he ignored her. “C’mon, be ready! Your turn is finally coming!” the guy played the last introductory chords and Sara finally began to sing, her eyes still rolling. “Blackbird singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly… All your life, you were only waiting for this moment to arise…” Eddie smiled to himself and the two kept on performing the song; at a certain point he slowed down the fingerpicking and started to whistle, imitating the birds chirping, while the girl looked at him in a perplexed way – but then burst into laughter. “The hell are you doin’???” “C’mon, try it – be a blackbird too!” he suggested her, still laughing, and when she emulated him he smiled satisfied “See? That was easy” “… idiot” the girl laughed again, and resumed to sing the final lines: “You were only waiting for this moment to arise, you were only waiting for this moment to arise, you were only waiting for this moment to arise…” Eddie finished to play, then smiled at her. “Well, you did learn to fly… Congratulations on your voice” “You’re just a flatterer, but thanks” she blushed, then cleared her throat “Instead, congratulations on your guitar style! You don’t limit yourself in strummin’ away on it… you play it, Ed” “Nope, I’m not that good” “Have you ever considered the possibility of playin’ in the band? Like, for real” “In the band? A band with three guitars?” “Yeah, why not? Kind of a Lynyrd Skynyrd thing, ya know” “Well, I’m just the new guy – I don’t know if Mike and Stone would agree…” he shrugged “Plus, as I said before, I can’t seriously play it” “Hmmm, as you wish… But, in your shoes, I’d give it a try” “Who knows, maybe in the future? Like ten years from now, just gimme enough time to practice…” “Why, are you really believin’ that you guys are goin’ to last that long?!” she provoked him, and the guy laughed. “No, you’re right – but, in the meantime, I’d be really glad to make at least a duet with you at the karaoke” “No fuckin’ way, I’ll never set foot again on that goddamn place, sure as hell!” “Ok, as you wish… but, sooner or later, you will sing somethin’ with me” he pondered “Like a collaboration… I should seriously write somethin’ for two voices” “Don’t you fuckin’ dare, Vedder! This is a secret, I told ya once and I won’t tell you again: keep your mouth shut or there’ll be big troubles!” Eddie pretended to go along with her wishes and gave her a mischievous smile – then his gaze fell on something that was peeking from the pocket of her sweatshirt. “What’s that?” “Oh” the girl suddenly remembered its existence and pulled it out “Just a mixtape I was listening to before” “Can I?” he extended a hand and she gave it to him “Footprints like puddles – strange choice for a title… I like it” “It’s-err… It’s just a silly title, I wrote down random words” “It seems well put together to me…” Ed fumbled with its case and finally pulled out the tracklist. “It’s just a couple of songs for the days when I get the mean reds, nothing serious” “The… the mean reds?” he hadn’t even started to read through the track titles but stopped immediately “What’s that?” “Well… ever watched Breakfast at Tiffany’s?” the guy nodded and she went on “When Audrey Hepburn gets ‘em, she jumps in a cab and goes to Tiffany’s – and it calms her down, just like that” “Ok, now I get it – this right here is your personal Tiffany’s, right?” “It is” “Then it’s better if I don’t intrude” he quickly opened again the case and started to put away the tracklist, but her hand stopped him. “… Go on, I think you could appreciate it” He looked at her, a bit puzzled: “You sure?” “Yep – go on” The guy smiled and finally began to read it. “Let’s see… we’ve got Leonard Cohen – woah, Ella Fitzgerald! – Brian Eno and Tom Waits… you put The Boss too, awesome” “Yeah, Racing In The Street reminds me of the way I feel when I choose not to open my umbrella on rainy days” “I think he’d be honored to know it… well, you should totally lend this to me, there are a couple of songs in here that I don’t know and I’d like to hear ‘em” he stopped, scratching his nape a bit embarrassed “… of course, only if you feel ok with that” “Yeah – err, yeah, that’s fine… I don’t mind” “Great, thanks” “You’ll tell me what you think about it, ‘kay? And I also wanna know if you appreciated the ones you hadn’t heard before my magic tape came to your rescue” “… you just got yourself a deal” “That’s what I like to hear” Sara looked around, her gaze stopping on the surfboard in a corner, the big waves painted on some walls, the books and vinyls piled on the desk and shelves – a few were also scattered on the floor; she found out that the room really reflected Eddie’s soul – at least, for the little bits she knew about him. The girl also found herself really missing her old chamber, the one that was waiting for her in that godawful mess of her loft, with most of all her belongings stocked there and the furniture apparently put in a random way – when in reality it had been carefully arranged by her. Out of the corner of his eye Eddie clearly saw her sigh, so he quickly tried to introduce a new topic in order to offer her a little distraction. “Say… can you play some instrument?” Sara startled, a confused expression upon her face. “Who? Me?” the guy nodded and she went on “Nope – when I was a child I used to play the harmonica from time to time, but it was nothin’ serious” “Oh, I see – and you got a favorite instrument? One that you really enjoy listenin’ to, and maybe you’d also like to learn how to play?” “HA! Lemme surprise you: banjo, mandolin, kazoo – ya know, all those weird things” she listed, all proud “Oh, and I love bass too… but don’t tell Ament, pretty please!” “Ahahaha, ok! Pinky swear” he laughed, then they entwined their little fingers and the deal was made “But yeah, really unusual choices… I was expecting something entirely different” “Like what?” “Like… I dunno – violin? Piano? Maybe the harp too… You strike me as someone who would enjoy these instruments a lot” “… I strike you as someone this ordinary? Wow, Ed – you really have a way with words” “Shit, I-I didn’t mean that, I just-” “Relax, I was just teasing you!” Sara let out a carefree laugh “I know that on the outside I may give this impression… and let’s not talk about this squeaky, little voice of mine – it’s obvious that you’d link it to a violin instead of a kazoo” The guy laughed and gave her a playful push, then resumed his observations: “See? That’s why a collaboration of the two of us would be so interesting – and stop it, your voice isn’t squeaky” “You’re the one who has to stop it, Ed! Erase this crazy idea of yours right now or-” “Or what? You’re gonna kick my ass? Punch my cute face with those small, childish hands? I don’t think so, Fancini” “VEDDER, YOU’RE SO GOING DOWN” she roared and threw a cushion at him that perfectly landed on his face. “Ouch! How can such a little person be this evil???” he grabbed another pillow and did the same with her. “You’re one to talk! Beware the mighty Big Foot!” “See?! Well, I’m going to expose you in my next song, which is gonna be this caustic piece about how one should never trust Italian girls with big, brown eyes because in reality they’re Satan’s daughters – and, the good news? I’m so gonna force you to sing some lines, the ones with the nastiest insults” he laughed again, avoiding a cushion “I can’t wait to hear your angelic voice singin’ something along the lines of ‘you’re a sewer rat decaying in a cesspool of pride’…” “Angelic my ass! Stop talking about me singin’, nobody has to fuckin’ know it!” Sara gave him a strong push that made him fell legs in the air, her irascibility growing as she heard him guffaw without restraint. “Ok, ok, nobody will ever know this thing! I swear!” he shouted breathlessly among his laughter. “… nobody will ever know what?” were the words that came out from Layla’s mouth, as she suddenly peeped out from the door.

#Eddie Vedder #Jeff Ament #Pearl Jam #Eddie Vedder fanfiction #Pearl Jam fanfiction #grunge fanfiction #Jeff Ament fanfiction #Birds of a Feather #chapters

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deadcactuswalking · 4 years

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 09/10/2020

Okay, so as you know this show has been on a “hiatus” for reasons I explained in the last episode and I had been thinking of different ways to continue this. Eventually I came to the conclusion that it does not really matter if I skipped tens of songs, maybe even more than 100, because a lot of them don’t have lasting success and if I kept doing these massive blocks of songs from months ago I would pretty much get nowhere by the end of the year. So, I’m writing this on Saturday, meaning the UK Singles Chart updated yesterday, and I think it’s about time I get back in schedule. This week’s #1 is “Mood” by 24kGoldn and iann dior, and let’s discuss the new arrivals in the UK Top 75. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Dropouts and Returning Entries

So, how will this work? Well, it’s going to be pretty simple. No rundown of the top 10, no climbers and fallers, just reviews of the usually about 10 or so new songs that hit the UK Top 75. I’ll cover returning entries and drop-outs as well ever so briefly at the start of each episode, just for some additional clarity and information, I guess. This was actually a pretty damn busy week to start off with so we have a lot of drop-outs, some of which are pretty notable, like “Secrets” by DJ Regard and RAYE, “Fake Friends” by Ps1 and Alex Hosking, “Dinner Guest” by AJ Tracey and MoStack, Tion Wayne’s “I Dunno” featuring Dutchavelli and Stormzy, “Dancing in the Moonlight” by Jubel and Neimy and some other relatively unimportant one-week hits I won’t be mentioning here. Of course, there are songs that have been on the chart for months but I only recently covered like “This City” by Sam Fischer, “Kings & Queens” by Ava Max and “Don’t Need Love” by 220 KID and Gracey, as well as some gradual losses from the late Juice WRLD, those being “Smile” with the Weeknd and “Wishing Well”. Returning to the chart are “Real Life” by Burna Boy and Stormzy at #71, “One Too Many” by Keith Urban and P!nk at #57, “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac at #55 43 years after release because of this guy on TikTok drinking cranberry juice (That’s 2020 for you) and finally, “Levitating” by Dua Lipa at #30 thanks to a pretty good DaBaby remix. Now we have two album bombs to start this season off. Let’s go!

NEW ARRIVALS

#66 – “Always Forever” – Bryson Tiller

Produced by J-Louis, Teddy Walton and CAMEone

Bryson Tiller. I don’t really get or even know his music enough to spark any insight before listening, and to be transparent, no, I didn’t listen to that comeback album. Anniversary is a sequel of sorts to his debut album, Trapsoul, and I can expect just that, I imagine, from this very quick pre-release single dropped just a week or two before the album proper. This drowned-out, watery R&B style doesn’t usually work with me, especially when Drake does it, and Tiller’s nasal, high-pitched squeaky crooning here also does not fit this otherwise lovely production, with some fat bass 808s I really enjoy. The chorus is a mess of fleeting background vocal runs and the performance here while not embarrassing feels kind of lifeless and checked-out. Admittedly, some of the harmonies he hits in the third verse/bridge are pretty nice-sounding, but it feels wasted when the song just continues to flutter off afterwards with the same dull key patterns and frankly, this is just an uninteresting and clearly unfinished track barely under three minutes and never reaching a point where it feels worth listening to. If I were a Bryson Tiller fan, I would be pretty underwhelmed with this.

#65 – “Years Go By” – Bryson Tiller

Produced by Streetrunner and Tarik Azzouz

Well, here’s the opening track from the record, where Tiller has to make that impactful first impression, and with this reverb-drenched guitar melody in the intro and the distorted sound effects that start off the song proper, it starts off solid, and, I’m afraid to say, continues to be so. This obviously goes for a more direct trap-rap vibe with a skittering drum pattern that really bumps and a... pretty underwhelming two verses from Tiller here, who prefers to just kind of impersonate the Weeknd until the beat abruptly cuts out for pointless Auto-Tuned vocal riffing, and, yeah, this is just clumsy. The flows here are tired and messy, often clinging off the ledge of the beat, and even if I really like the cute synths in the outro, I can’t excuse this. Once again, it just seems unfinished, and lyrically on both tracks, he’s saying nothing of any substance. I guess he shouts out Jack Harlow and... Danny Phantom? He also seems to refer to himself as “Godtiller” by the end, as in Godzilla, because no-one’s stopping him from doing so. Sigh, next.

#62 – “Bet You Wanna” – BLACKPINK featuring Cardi B

Produced by TBHits, Mr. Franks and Teddy

You may be able to recognise a pattern here but no, I didn’t listen to this really short debut album by BLACKPINK either, pretty fittingly called The Album. This isn’t really a collaboration I understand or expected but it’s not that far-fetched, especially since BTS did collaborate with Nicki Minaj a year or so ago. The songs features the girls only singing in English over some finger-snaps that sound painfully fake and some demanding piano that is completely switched for the pre-chorus only for it to come back later and then technically in the chorus but covered in tropical-like percussion and some background squealing, only for Cardi B to interrupt with a surprisingly PG verse – you can really tell she had to censor herself here – and that’s all she does in the song. This actually is a fair bit more refined than K-pop I heard previously as it seems to at least stick to a musical motif which seems to be a pretty difficult concept for a lot of these bands. I mean, that’s probably just because of the Western producers on this song like TBHits, who’s worked with Ariana Grande before. It isn’t a headache like “Kill This Love” and I really love the vocal performance from who I thinks is “Jennie” here although the others seem to scroll through ugly distortion effects, particularly in their verse. I mean, it sure is listenable and honestly kind of a far cry from the earlier songs I heard from them, but it’s still not very good. Sorry.

#60 – “On My Mind” – Diplo and SIDEPIECE

Produced by Diplo and SIDEPIECE

So, in 1996, R&B girl group 702 released a pretty solid new jack swing jam as their debut single, featuring Missy Elliott, called “Steelo”. It was a minor hit in itself and even sampled the Police – the rock band fronted by Sting, I feel the need to clarify considering the current climate. It’s not a bad song, albeit perhaps overlong and unintentionally intimidating at times. You can tell Missy’s phoning it in a bit here, but she’s still as charming as ever here. 24 years later, we have “On My Mind”, a glorified house remix of the tune by Diplo and two of his buddies, basically. Is it any good? Well, yes. The sprinkling of cute synths in the intro combined with that leering vocal line really replicate the vibe of the original song, and it does that even better when a single vocal sample from the bridge is looped constantly under a pretty pounding bass and a typical four-on-the-floor house track. This song’s bridge of its own is incredibly pretty as well, to the point where the squawking and low-tone beeping don’t really bother me, especially when it just... crashes with buzzy bass drops that sound like a mix of a dubstep track and a car zooming past. It shifts up the entire song and honestly it works, it’s an effective climax, this is pretty fun, albeit lacking many ideas. It doesn’t really matter if those ideas are executed as well as they are here, so, thanks, Diplo.

#54 – “Rich Gnarly Dude Stuff” – 21 Savage and Metro Boomin featuring Young Thug

Produced by Metro Boomin and Peter Lee Johnson

Of course, it’s not actually titled “Rich Gnarly Dude Stuff” but I’ve got to at least try and keep this show clean. Now, I haven’t listened to many albums this year but 21 Savage and Metro Boomin’s collaborative album Savage Mode II is definitely one of the best of those few. Admittedly, it has a pretty lacklustre beginning and it doesn’t really make sense as a sequel to that Savage Mode EP, particularly because it’s trying to pay homage to a bunch of different styles of 80s, 90s and 2000s rap to the point of identity crisis, but it is one of the best album listening experiences I’ve had this year, with some absolutely killer production from Metro, the sheer brilliance of the Morgan Freeman interludes and 21’s improvement as a rapper being really on show throughout the record. “Rich Gnarly Dude Stuff” is one of my absolute favourites on the album, with the smooth as hell synths and that violin sample that is just hypnotic. 21 Savage slides on this beat and he actually sounds pretty slick with Auto-Tune here, especially over this production which is just beautiful; Metro really is the highlight of the record all things considered. In fact, 21 kind of loses me with his brand flexing and the weird empty spaces that he seems to compensate for by jumbling words together to fit the meter which is unfitting for the mood of the song. Thugger, however, I’m convinced can do no wrong. His upbeat, joyful inflections are in great contrast with his crooning in the second half of the verse, and even though he only really uses one flow through the verse, it leaves a good impression on me fast enough for me to dismiss that. Are they on-topic? Barely. Are they saying anything of substance other than some flexing, sex talk and threats? No, I mean, it’s 21 Savage and Young Thug, but the most important thing here is delivery and these guys have it in spades. I’m a lot more convinced that Thugger has hit men than YoungBoy Never Broke Again is all I’m saying. That being said, please don’t send your shooters, Mr. Broke Again.

#43 – “Runnin” – 21 Savage and Metro Boomin

Produced by Metro Boomin

After the gorgeous introduction from Metro and Morgan Freeman, you are met headfirst with the wrath of... a pretty Diana Ross sample. The way Metro flips this into this head-nodding almost Memphis-like trap beat makes it sound a lot more ominous and menacing though, and it really hits when 21 comes in with his opening bars that start off the project, giving you a basic rundown about what he’s going to do in the album only in the first verse: beat people up, buy cars, spend money on women who he only keeps around for sex and finally, shoot the opps. In fact, he calls his Draco a paedophile because “all of his opps gettin’ touched”, which is a questionable line. 21, are you saying your opps are all children? Regardless, 21 does have some pretty funny wordplay and punchlines, particularly in the second verse with a really clever line about biblical marijuana (Go figure). Basically, he grows his weed in the Garden of Eden, but “zaza” is really high-quality marijuana and also a name mentioned in the Bible. I don’t know if that was intentional or not but if it was a coincidence it at least adds to the lyrics of the song. I have to say though that the chorus is weak and tedious as all hell, and by the end of the song that sample has well-overstayed its welcome, making the song hit a lot less harder than I think was intended. Hey, at least it has Morgan Freeman on it.

#40 – “Lovesick Girls” – BLACKPINK

Produced by R.Tee and 24

So, here we are in the top 40, with more BLACKPINK and to my surprise, honestly. I figured that the song with the big western rap star would be here but I suppose this did have a video behind it – that was controversial in Korea because of how the Korean Health and Medical Workers Union objected to Jennie wearing a sexualised nurse outfit, because, well, sure. This time the lyrics are mostly in Korean, and it sounds immediately much more like what I’d expect from what 2020’s K-pop has to offer. There is a pretty clean guitar loop that the whole song runs off of, some great vocal performances amongst simple rap flows and a drastic shift into an English chorus with some 80s-like synths and admittedly a nice synthpop beat. I prefer this a lot to “Bet You Wanna” but as it is it’s just inoffensive. I like Jennie’s rap verse though. “Don’t want to be a princess, I’m priceless / a Prince not even on my list”? Come on, that’s kind of fire, at least for middling Korean electropop standards.

#38 – “Heart of Glass” – Miley Cyrus

There aren’t any production credits on Spotify, Wikipedia or Genius, mostly because this is a live performance from iHeartRadio Music Festival – however they’re still doing that in these times – that was just dumped on streaming and impressively got all the way into the top 40. To be honest, I can’t say I’m a fan of the original – it’s a well-written song flattened by weak albeit infectious disco production and whilst the groove is infectious, the song has just never clicked with me, so I’m not excited to listen to Cyrus’ cover but hey, anything to delay talking about back-to-back Drake features and D-Block Europe. I WAS excited however when it started with a rock breakdown, especially that drum fill, but it soon restarted to the groove that we all know the song for and one that again, I never was too fond of to begin with. Miley is energetic, raspy and almost growling here at points but the instrumentation is somewhat stiff, which again is a problem I have with the original. It also doesn’t replace the synth riff with an epic guitar solo as I kind of hoped. At the point where Miley drops into “na-na-na”’s and unintelligible yelling is when I just zone out. I really hoped this could have been better, but I’m not a fan.

#35 – “Come Over” – Jorja Smith featuring Popcaan

Produced by Izaiah and MadisonLST

It’s rare there’s a song on these charts that intrigues or excites me in the way this one does, not because it’s particularly novel or groundbreaking, but just because this is a new song from two artists I like but haven’t checked out much from, and I have yet to hear it so I’m glad it debuted this high. I’m happy for Popcaan too, he seems to be having a good year signed to OVO and all, even if I’ve never really tried to listen to his solo stuff. I’ve heard many features from the guy though, with Drake, Kanye, Pusha T, Gorillaz on “Saturnz Barz” and especially alongside Jamie xx and Young Thug on one of my favourite songs of all time, “I Know There’s Gonna Be (Good Times)”, and he does not detract from a single one of them. I enjoyed Smith’s debut album a fair bit and whilst nothing she’s released since has really clicked with me, I’m still excited to hear what she has in store. I really love the production here, even if it is a tad fragmented, especially with that awkward vocal sample, but the atmospheric and hell, even spacey dancehall beat really evokes dub. I also hate the way that vocal sample is manipulated to a nasal, pitch-shifted tone in the bridge, but I guess the chorus is really pretty. Popcaan is kind of obnoxious crooning on here but he flows when he starts really flowing... then he’s immediately interrupted by Jorja singing the first verse again for whatever reason, and, yeah, this song’s a mess. It’s so oddly produced that by the time the air horns, yes, air horns, kick in during the outro, you are left with no real idea of what you just listened to. Or at least I was.

#28 – “Mr. Right Now” – 21 Savage and Metro Boomin featuring Drake

Produced by Metro Boomin and DAVID x ELI

And now, Drake. Thankfully this is the better of the two Drake-featured songs we have here, but this is still a low point on Savage Mode II and definitely an unnecessary inclusion. The production here is actually incredible, with those sweet strings and a quiet vocal sample that is absolutely infectious. The issue here is 21 Savage cannot really do an R&B hook that well, and even when he’s in his element on a trap beat, his bars are non-existent and generic. That pre-chorus is just awful coming from 21. I hate to say it, but maybe Drake could have been more involved here other than the second verse, where he starts by just repeating what 21 said, and then continues to just be Drake, and I’m not sure about the general public, but listening to Drake being Drake is nothing more than monotonous at this point. The only interesting thing he really says in his verse is that he used to date SZA in 2008, which, according to SZA herself, is actually inaccurate by about a year, which is just... well, Drake being Drake. Also, I’m really sick of quarantine music already. You should always reflect on the experience before making art about something like this, and I feel like a fleeting reference to the pandemic with a one-and-done bar I’ve heard a couple times before already (“We in quarantine, but my M’s long”) just dates this slow and sloppy R&B cut even more. Calling it now: if Metro hadn’t produced this, this would be unlistenable.

#24 – “Outta Time” – Bryson Tiller featuring Drake

Produced by Nineteen85, Vinylz and 40

Well, I guess it’s time to test this hypothesis. I don’t think that Drake has come out with anything salvageable this year, mostly because he’s been releasing leftovers and branding them as such, and they still top charts. I mean, “Laugh Now Cry Later” is okay but that’s mostly saved by 20 seconds of Lil Durk being an absolute treasure. The way he croons gargled nonsense and follows it up with “Bring Drake to the hood, surround Drake around Drac’s” might be the funniest and best moment in pop music this year. This song with Bryson Tiller is nowhere near as amusing but honestly Drake mumble-singing over a pretty classy 90s-reminiscent R&B sample is usually quite pleasant... here he just sounds whiny and immature, and he’s pretty clearly recycling cadences and flows he’s already used. He also has zero chemistry with Tiller, maybe because they never interact on the song, with Tiller’s Auto-Tuned crooning saved for the last half of the track, mostly because I imagine it’s easier to get streams with Drake at the start. Honestly, I prefer Bryson Tiller’s part. Hey, I don’t like his voice, but over that sweet Snoh Aalegra sample, I’m not going to say it doesn’t work. This is the best I’ve heard from the album but I mean it’s not like there’s competition.

#21 – “Wonder” – Shawn Mendes

Produced by Shawn Mendes, Nate Mercereau, Scott Harris and Kid Harpoon

Really? Only #21? Okay, well, I suppose some Shawn Mendes songs are slow burners but considering how successful “If I Can’t Have You” and “Senorita” were right after release I did expect this new lead single to seep at least into the top 15, especially since the UK has a tendency to just let anybody in the top 20, but, hey, if the song’s good, it shouldn’t really matter. Much like “In My Blood” from the last album rollout, this is a ballad, although this is specifically a post-breakup ballad where he contemplates on his manufactured relationship with Camila Cabello. So it couldn’t get into the top 20 even with fake personal drama surrounding the single? Wow. Well, I actually kind of like the lyrical content here, especially the second verse where he briefly addresses toxic masculinity, and how it makes him feel like less of a man when he cries because that’s what society’s conventions and norms programmed him to feel. I would like it a bit better if it weren’t as on-the-nose and kind of clumsy as it is, especially since the rest of the song is just wondering what it would feel like to be loved by Camila Cabello and some dreary, post-breakup lines. The first verse taps into more profound and insightful territory to but it goes nowhere and I find it hard to care about this melodrama at all, even if it is backed by a pretty powerful choir arrangement. Much like “If I Can’t Have You” and some of his other tracks before this, especially “Mercy”, this feels like a pretty overproduced, underwritten angst jam with absolutely no teeth to it other than a performance from Mendes that goes into some belting territory but is overall too restrained to fit this kind of anthemic orchestral instrumentation and especially those drums. In conclusion, this is a waste of potential but at least it had potential to begin with, unlike...

#11 – “UFO” – D-Block Europe featuring Aitch

Produced by Cardo, Cubeatz and DY Krazy

People complain about the charts all the time, particularly the type and quality of music on it. This is especially true with the USA’s Billboard Hot 100 and I understand that chart has incredible flaws it hasn’t made up for, but at least it doesn’t have D-Block Europe every other week. I mean, a pretty great British rap song even ended up on the Hot 100 thanks to TikTok and DaBaby, that being “Don’t Rush” by Young T & Bugsey featuring Headie One. That proves that these recurring antagonists of REVIEWING THE CHARTS are not necessary; I like Young T & Bugsey. We could just replace these oversaturated whining idiots with those guys, but no, we have Young Adz and Dirtbike LB, and they’re here to stay. Oh, and even better, they’re here with Aitch, pioneer of the new “gentrified drill” genre. Apparently to Young Adz, this is a “different” song that could isolate their audience, but I just see this as pretty normal Young Adz moaning over guitar-trap beats. It’s not drill, but it’s not like this is all that different or interesting... like at all. Adz has this hilariously bad “ooh-wee” flow that just sounds ridiculous on this beat, and Aitch proves his status as the whitest man in UK rap – and this is the country that brought you Professor Green. The song isn’t even about spaceships or any type of unidentified flying object! It’s just about having sex with drug dealers, with the only reference to the supernatural being the intro where Young Adz says that this sex is apparently happening in space... for no reason. And Dirtbike LB, well...

I’mma cover my pain with these shades

Just as embarrassing as usual. These guys have got an album out this week by the way, with 29 songs and a full 91 minutes of this same garbage they’ve been pumping out mixtapes of for two years now. They’re still funny occasionally and never on purpose, but the humorous inflections and stupid lines are now so few and far between that it’s barely worth pointing any of that out anymore. God.

Conclusion

This wasn’t just a busy week to start off on, but also a week where I’m not left impressed by really any of this, even from the album I liked. Worst of the Week still goes to D-Block Europe and Aitch with “UFO” with Bryson Tiller picking up the Dishonourable Mention for both of his first two lousy tracks here. Other than that, well, I only really like “Rich Gnarly Dude Stuff” by 21 Savage, Metro Boomin and Young Thug so that runs away with Best of the Week, but I guess I’ll give the Honourable Mention to “On My Mind” by Diplo and SIDEPIECE, for at least being kind of fun if not anything else.

Here’s the top 10 for this week:

...and that’s all from me. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more garbage and hopefully I’ll see you next week.

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sinceileftyoublog · 5 years

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Live Picks: 5/10

Jessica Pratt; Photo by Guillaume Belvez

BY JORDAN MAINZER

Cosmic folk, thoughtful jazz, classic pop songwriting, and contemplative house.

Jessica Pratt & Joseph Shabason, Sleeping Village

As much as the “Jessica Pratt” is quiet take is a tired one, when she opened for Steve Gunn at Empty Bottle in 2015, her delivery proved to be no match for rude chatters. Quiet Signs is her first album to be recorded in a professional studio, yes, but Pratt’s arrangements loom larger, her embrace of quiet a theme more than a strategy. As such, they stand to make for a live performance that won’t simply just be louder but will be powerful enough to withstand the environment.

Quiet Signs starts with “Opening Night”, cinematic lounge piano and Pratt’s voice, singing wordlessly, barely there, echoing in the background from a mile away. The song segues into “As the World Turns”, the strums of Pratt’s acoustic guitar emulating the same chord progression as the piano on the previous track. On that and on the rest of the album, her pitch-perfect, high, semi-nasal voice is subdued by hiss and echo; as the words flow on “Fare The Well”, for instance, her vocals fill the gaps between staccato keyboards, shimmering synth hues, and flutes.

Pratt’s radical quiet goes beyond creating something beautiful. It serves to assuage her anxieties. “He’s sincerely worn this weary heart,” Pratt sings of relationship malaise on “Here My Love”. On “Poly Blue”, she’s lovelorn, still, but giving advice to someone even deeper--over Spanish-style guitar playing, pulsating synths, and flourishes of flute, it’s the sonic manifestation of butterflies. Of course, sometimes, she can’t help it, singing of “somber wind” on “This Time Around”. But for the most part, she retains an elevated perspective. The album ends with literal elevation. On “Aeroplane”, Pratt sings from the perspective of someone looking down at city lights from the sky, wanting to stay in the ethereal moment forever, sauntering along as the world rushes by.

8.1/10

Quiet Signs by Jessica Pratt

We interviewed Joseph Shabason about his wonderful record Aytche (one of our favorite records of 2017), about the fragility of life and memory, touching on experiences with degenerative illness, doctor-assisted death, and the Holocaust (his grandparents are survivors). Its follow-up, Anne, which came out late last year, hones in on one specific subject: his mother, who suffers from Parkinson’s. Like Aytche, the new record interweaves Shabason’s mournful saxophone with arpeggio synthesizer lines and voice/field recordings. The latter, specifically, comes in the form of interviews with his mother; Shabason previously used interviews in a powerful way on Aytche’s “Westmeath”, and it’s both moving and exhilarating to hear him sample bits and pieces of his mother’s voice over an entire album.

UPDATE: Shabason today also just released the Anne EP, a companion piece to last year’s record.

Tommy Stinson, Thalia Hall

None other than The Replacements’ Tommy Stinson is joining alt rock legends The Lemonheads on their current tour. Over the past few years, he’s reunited Bash & Pop, working with Nicole Atkins, and produced The Yawpers and together PANGEA. Live tonight, expect him to play a mix of solo and Bash & Pop material.

Alt rock legends The Lemonheads headline.

Leon Vynehall, Smartbar

After a series of mesmerizing EPs, British producer and DJ Leon Vynehall finally released a full length album last year, Nothing Is Still, via Ninja Tune. It wasn’t as obviously uptempo as something like the aptly titled Rojus (Designed to Dance), but it continued his exploration of sample-based minimal house and swelling, orchestral arrangements, all designed to help tell the story of his grandparents’ journey to the US.

As for what he might deliver in a DJ set, a better indicator might be his entry in the DJ-Kicks series earlier this year, a mix of his usual ambient IDM with everything from soul/R&B to noise thrown in.

Smartbar resident Olin opens.

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musicdeejaysorceress · 5 years

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Nostalgia Music Playlist Also on Youtube Updated Writings Added By Wednesday October 30 2019

Nostalgia Music Playlist Also on Youtube

First off, I want to thank all who have taken the time to view all of my online content including these music playlists, the following is some of the songs from the Nostalgia Music Playlist that I initially started approximately 9 months ago, one of the multiple reasons why I am sharing this music playlist is because I have had the good fortune of unexpectedly discovering that this is one of my more highly viewed music playlists and to intuitively help remind me that it is ok to share some of my music interests provided I do so in a wise and intuitively thought process with additional thanks to those who look at my online writings. I intend to share more of the songs from this playlist within 49 to 70 hours andor sooner from now.

Wednesday October 30, 2019 by 1119pm-I listened to my creative intuition to add previous youtube comments that I have previously written to a multiple number of the songs, I continue to appreciate all who view these writings, though I admit that I must allow the option to be open-ended if I prefer to post written comments to the remaining songs andor to just let it be currently the way it is. I say this with much happiness in my heart, it is just that I must give myself enough time to carefully ponder on this because there are a multiple number of other areas/goals that I must also focus/set to accomplish in my personal andor professional life. Regardless of what I eventually decide, it has been one of my multiple passions to share this nostalgia music playlist and to get a glimpse from other youtube commenters on how diverse music genres of songs can be universal-listened to multiple people from various backgrounds, almost in a music can be a beneficial uniter, an uplifting channel/vehicle for unity.

Nostalgia Music Playlist

Side Travis

Youtube comment from approximately 9 months ago

Side by Travis is another song that I first heard around the early 2000s when I was first stationed in Yokosuka Japan, definitely by the summer 2003 andor earlier timeframe via I think what was a Brit Awards cd collection. I now intuitively and fully understand the meaning of this meaningful song that is Side by Travis. I truthfully wish that I could have intuitively and logically realized the message and deeper meaning of this song when I first heard it when I was around 22 years old. However, better late than never and I prefer to be discreet when I first figured out the full meaning of Side by Travis especially since I am in the process of learning to embody the message and meaning of this song as I reluctantly admit to still being a work in progress/construction in progress when it comes to this.

Addicted Saving Abel

Pain Three Days Grace

Come Go With Me Expose

Your Wildest Dreams Moody Blues

I Can See Clearly Now Jimmy Cliff

Gold Spandau Ballet

Stellify Ian Brown

Heart & Soul T’Pau

Follow You Follow Me Genesis

Wings Little Mix

Youre Still The One Shania Twain

Clumsy Fergie

Belinda Carlisle I Get Wea

Dolphins Cry Live

Express Yourself Madonna

Caught Up In You 38 Special

Addicted Saving Abel

Secret Rendezvous Karyn White

If You Only Knew Shinedown

I Feel The Earth Move Martika

Circle In The Sand Belinda Carlisle

Desire U2

Orinoco Flow Enya

In Your Eyes Kylie Minogue

Sensitized Kylie Minogue

Trying Not To Love You Nickelback

Therapy Armin Van Buuren James Newman

Lovesong The Cure

C’Mon and Get My Love D-Mob feat. Cathy Dennis

Do You Know Angel City

Touch Me Angel City

I Wanna Be Bad Willa Ford

Va Va Voom Nicki Minaj

I’m So Into You SWV

Slide In GoldFrap

Meet Me Halfway Black Eyed Peas

Scream & Shout will.i.am

Burnin For You Blue Oyster Cult

Dr. Feelgood Motley Crue

The Perfect Drug Nine Inch Nails

Latch Disclosure feat. Sam Smith

Crush Dave Matthews Band

Raindrops (Encore Une Fois Pt. II) Extended Mix by Sash! Feat. Stunt youtube comment from approximately 2 months ago

I must properly credit and admit that a version of this Raindrops song from the Trance Party Vol. 6 that I enjoyed listening to multiple times (before heading to where I worked in Norfolk Virginia) around the 2008 timeframe is one of the reasons that indirectly influenced why I enjoy this youtube version of Raindrops (Encore Une Fois Pt. II) to this day. I was living quite a carefree and a little bit of a freespirited life during this time yet one of the reasons why I first enjoyed this distinctive song even then and even to this day relates to the exciting adventurous vibe energy to this song.

Is This Love Whitesnake youtube comment from approximately 2 months ago

I feel very lucky to have heard this dazzling romantic rock song Is This Love by Whitesnake by the time I was between 8 to 11 years old either by local radio andor television. I also started to enjoy Is This Love by Whitesnake so much more by the July 2011 timeframe because it was contained on a music collection titled American Anthems that I unexpectedly discovered through the Amazon UK website.

Rock You Like A Hurricane Scorpions youtube comment from 2 months ago

To think I was somewhere around 13 to 15 years old when I unintentionally heard this push the envelope yet amusing classic rock song that is Rock You Like a Hurricane by the Scorpions via local radio. Obviously, I enjoy the album version of Rock You Like a Hurricane, however I feel that this live version of Rock You Like a Hurricane also does the album version justice.

No One Like You Scorpions youtube comment from 2 months ago

I am lucky to have been exposed to multiple brilliant classic rock songs via online and radio. This song No One Like You by the Scorpions is a refreshing/one of a kind song that I first heard around by the time I was between 13 to 16 years old via local radio, and I started to unexpectedly enjoy much more by the late 2010/early 2011 timeframe.

Miss You The Rolling Stones youtube comment from 2 months ago

I truly wish that I could easily recall the very first time in my life that I first heard I Miss You by The Rolling Stones. However, I am so glad in a pleasant way to have surprisingly heard this well made classic rock song via a local metropolitan Washington D.C. radio station less than a year ago.

Wicked Game Chris Isaak

Peaceful Easy Feeling Eagles youtube comment from 2 months ago

There are a multiple number of songs that I enjoy by the Eagles with I confess some of the songs such as Witchy Woman, One of These Nights, Take It Easy and Life In The Fast Lane being among some of those songs. However, something about this Peaceful Easy Feeling classic rock tune by the Eagles made an indelible mark on my soul when I first heard this song via local radio by the time I was between my mid 20s to late 20s. The calming and yet optimistic vocals and music also do it for me with this entertaining classic rock song.

Candyman Christina Aguilera youtube comment from 2 months ago

There was a catchy commercial that I spotted sometime around the 2007 to 2009 timeframe featured the Candyman song by Christina Aguilera which helped me become aware of this daring song. I admit that the music video to the Candyman song also gives this Christina Aguilera song a quirky and compelling music story quality/vibe.

I Begin To Wonder Danni Minogue

Full Service New Kids On the Block youtube comment from 2 months ago

I confess that I got into this Full Service song by the New Kids On The Block by the summer 2011 timeframe some time after purchasing the Block music collection by New Kids on the Block by the February 2011 timeframe. Additionally, I find the metaphor of the auto/car imagery to describe what they intend to do do for their love interest/intended human target in this song very novel/distinctive.

Rendez-Vu Basement Jaxx youtube comment from 2 months ago

I have to credit first hearing this Rendez-vu song by Basement Jaxx from a Brit Awards music collection by the 2002 timeframe (I just wish that I could remember which one). The romantic vocals and the futuristic music create a one of a kind electronic/club/dance tune/melody.

When the Lights Go Out Five youtube comment from 2 months ago

I admit that I am previously familiar with this illicit music pleasure song that is When The Lights Go Out by Five because I had heard this song via a local radio station when I was around 17/18 years old. The 90s dance, club and hip-hop music melding coupled with the bold vocals and lyrics definitely make this song an entertaining nostalgic 90s song.

Bubblin Blue feat. L.A.D.E

Voodoo Adam Lambert youtube comment from 2 months ago

I confess that this soulful and passionate song that is Voodoo by Adam Lambert first penetrated my music soul when I first heard it by the October 2011 timeframe. Something about the shining vocals and radiant music makes me think of a musical story about someone who has left such a powerful mark on the singer's soul to where their love for that person metaphorically influences the person to be totally wrapped around the finger of the person who they are bewitched by (in love with).

My Kinda Party Jason Aldean youtube comment from 2 months ago

I admit that I happen to unexpectedly find out about a music collection by Jason Aldean online around summer 2011 that contained the My Kinda Party song (definitely by the August 2011 timeframe). For whatever reason, this catchy country song played in my mind today.

If You Only Knew Shinedown

Practice What You Preach Barry White

Possum Kingdom The Toadies

Owner of A Lonely Heart Yes

Lovesong The Cure

Live version of The Lovesong by The Cure via the New Wave & Rock 80’s Memories-It was an easy decision for me to take a chance on listening to a live version of The Cure’s classic Lovesong because I have enjoyed this creative and moving song for multiple years now, and first hearing it inside a store around the time I was 8 or 9 years old. I understand that others may interpret this song in different ways though I have always taken this song to be about a person telling another that they are always going to be in love with the person regardless of what they may do or say andor how long they may be in that person’s life, basically a positive song about enduring love, either way I find this song to be very meaningful.

Last Nine Inch Nails

Only When I Sleep The Corrs

Soothe My Soul Depeche Mode youtube comment from 2 months ago

Depeche Mode - Soothe My Soul (Official Music Video) Soothe My Soul-I’m fortunate to have had a chance to purchase the music collection that contained this song in 2013 and I reluctantly admit that certain circumstances came up to where I started to hear and enjoy this song more in the 2017 timeframe the more that I would hear this song via my iheartradio account . This group sounds just as good live, I have been to a Depeche Mode concert in 2013 and in 2017 and both times the live performances were even better than I imagined and I have to credit my husband for influencing me to like this group in the first place because he introduced me to a good mix of their music around the year when we first met (we met in August 2002).

2 Hearts Kylie Minogue youtube comment from one month ago

2 Hearts by Kylie Minogue-My angelic husband actually introduced me to a great deal of her music around the 2003 timeframe and I started to listen to Kylie Minogue much more after we got married in 2004. X was one of the first music collections that I wanted to buy via my own free will though my husband was again being very sweet by purchasing me the X music collection that this sensual and well crafted song that 2 Hearts is on. I admit that I started to enjoy this song around the autumn 2007 timeframe when I first heard it online.

Things Can Only Get Better Howard Jones

Pocketful of Sunshine Natasha Bedingfield

No One Is To Blame Howard Jones

All I Wanna Do Danni Minogue

Mr. Saxobeat Alexandra Stan youtube comment from 1 month ago

Thank goodness for one of the Future Trance cds (Germany music import) introducing me to Mr. Saxobeat by Alexandra Stan around the summer 2011 timeframe.

Sex Type Thing Stone Temple Pilots youtube comment from 1 month ago

Sex Type Thing by Stone Temple Pilots-I confess that this song first seeped into my mind when I first heard this song as a 90s teenager via radio andor television (sometime between the time I was between 14 to 17 years old). For whatever reason, I admit that this song crept back into my memory when I heard it again around the autumn 2009 timeframe when I saw a Stone Temple Pilots greatest hits cd at an Orlando Florida library (this particular library was a few miles from the University of Central Florida campus). Anyhow, the more I think of it the woman in that music video definitely plays whatever role she was given very well though for some reason her dress makes me think of a Cinderella vibe.

Wicked Garden Stone Temple Pilots

Red Light Go Mea Fisher youtube comment from 1 month ago

I’m both so grateful and feeling happy/joyful that youtube has the image for the Femmes Fatales The 12 Leading Ladies of Electronica music collection because that music collection is where I first heard the electrifying and seductive Red Light Go song by Mea Fisher around the autumn 2008 timeframe and one of my earliest memories of hearing and enjoying this song was when this song was playing in a car that I had and drove in to work around this timeframe (I had purchased the music collection from some music store inside MacArthur Center mall in Norfolk Virginia by the autumn 2008 timeframe and the mp3 music collection from Amazon multiple years later). Anyhow, the vocals and music to this Red Light Go song by Mea Fisher are very memorable despite this song being definitely different from being a super cheerful type of electronic/club song.

I’ll Make You Feel Good K7 youtube comment from 1 month ago

Regarding K7 I'll Make You Feel Good song-I first heard this bold and innovative song during my teenage years during local radio and for whatever unexpected reason I got into this song again by around the 2008 timeframe when I was residing in Norfolk Virginia.

Right Round Flo Rida feat. Kesha

I Like It Rough by Lady Gaga-I confess that this is an illicit pleasure song that I first heard by around the 2008 timeframe through a zune music player that I use to have. Additionally, Lady Gaga’s music was played via local radio in Norfolk Virginia (where my husband and I were residing in during that timeframe) and via online, hearing through these channels Lady Gaga’s music indirectly influenced me to give more of her songs a listen

Cold Crossfade

Waiting For You Layla comment from 1 month ago

This youtube music video for Waiting For You by Layla via the Femmes Fatales the 12 Leading Ladies of Electronica deserve more views. i first heard this bold and club like song around the autumn 2008 timeframe when hearing this song after buying the Femmes Fatales cd collection from the MacArthur Center mall in Norfolk Virginia, I enjoyed the collection so much that it was an easy decision for me to purchase the mp3 music collection from Amazon multiple years later.

Sunlight In The Rain Kelli Ali youtube comment from 1 month ago

I remember this beautiful song Sunlight In The Rain by Kelli Ali from around the 2005 to 2007 timeframe because my angelic husband had us listening to a chillout music compilation and this gem of a song was one of the songs on this collection. I am happy/overjoyed that this gorgeous song is also available on youtube.

Siria Endless Summer

I Surrender Kate Ryan via the song version similar to the youtube poster image of Trance Volume 2 youtube comment from 1 month ago

This music version of I Surrender by Kate Ryan is similar to a version of the song that I heard via a Best of Dance 2008 music collection by the December 2008/January 2009 timeframe. I am thrilled/excited to find the version of this song on this youtube music channel.

Deeper Fragma

Burning Love Katie Jewels

Rush Rush Full Length version Paula Abdul youtube comment from 1 month ago

I’m so glad that this full length version is currently available on youtube the chemistry between Paula Abdul and Keanu Reeves is sizzling. I unexpectedly found this full length youtube video version of Rush Rush by Paula Abdul though I am lucky to have first heard this song in the early 90s via television andor radio by the time I was somewhere between 11 to 14 years old, the music, video, and the vocals for this song are enthralling.

Feeling Hypnotized Blackliquid Remix Colette youtube comment from 1 month ago

This song Feelin Hypnotized by Colette is far from the most cheerful song, yet there is something about this song I find very magnetic nearly 11 years after I first heard this unique song (autumn 2008 in Norfolk Virginia). I’m thrilled to find Hypnotized by Colette on this youtube channel via the Femmes Fatales The 12 Leading Ladies of Electronic because it was the Femmes Fatales collection was where I first heard this song.

Sweet Dreams La Bouche

Little Bird Annie Lennox

Beyond The Invisible Enigma

Lovergirl Teena Marie youtube comment from 1 week ago

It is definitely beyond rhyme and reason why this classic song that is Lovergirl by Teena Marie is on my mind tonight. There are a multiple number of fun to read comments on this page in regards to this song all I can add is that probably in the case of multiple music listeners on this page I first unexpectedly heard this song via local radio as a teenager and then I started to enjoy the song much more after hearing it on a local California radio station in my 20s. Fast forward by around the December 10, 2010 and via circumstances that are better for me to be discreet about, I started to enjoy this song again more frequently. Though I must say after hearing Teena Marie's powerful vocals in this Lovergirl song that the music coupled with her vocals showcase a dynamo vocal/music powerhouse with this song.

See You Again Miley Cyrus youtube comment from 1 week ago

I find See You Again by Miley Cyrus to be very fun and pleasant to listen to even after multiple years after first hearing this catchy song. One of my earliest memories of when I happen to have unexpectedly heard this song was around the late 2007/early 2008 timeframe when I heard this song play on a local Florida radio station in a car that I had at the time (My husband and I were stationed on the Mayport Naval base through the navy around this timeframe).

Take My Breath Away Berlin

Gimme Some Love Gina G youtube comment from 1 week ago

I'm thrilled to see this exciting dance/club song and the image cover for the song that is Gimme Some Love by Gina G here on youtube for two major reasons, one because I saw an mp3 version of thissong available for purchase online and only realized this after seeing this image and 2 this song brings back happy memories of when I first heard this song in my early 20s from a dance music collection that I had purchased multiple years ago when I was in Japan, even my amazing husband was singing part of this song the first time I started to play it on youtube tonight.

Self Control Laura Branigan youtube comment from 1 week ago

I feel very lucky to have first heard Self Control by Laura Branigan when I was around 7 andor 8 years old (1987/1988 timeframe) via local radio, this unique song penetrated my soul the first time I heard it as a very young girl and multiple years later I still enjoy listening to this elegant song and I'm so glad the the music video is available to watch online because even the music video has a distinctive storytelling quality to it that enhances what appears to be a sleeptime dream in this music video for the song Self Control by Laura Branigan

I See Right Through To You DJ Encore

Something Kinda Ooooh Girls Aloud

Only When I Lose Myself Depeche Mode

Promiscuous Girl Nelly Furtado Timbaland

Turn Me On David Guetta Nicki Minaj youtube comment from 7 months ago

Turn Me On David Guetta Nicki Minaj-As with many others, this daring song penetrated my soul when I first listened to the music collection that this distinctive song was on around what was either the July 2011 andor August 2011 timeframe.

Love Affair Kylie Minogue

Love Affair by Kylie Minogue-I have to credit my heavenly husband for indirectly influencing one of the multiple reasons why I still enjoy a multiple number of her songs multiple years later (because he had introduced me to more of her music in the early 2000s. For whatever reason, I noticed and listened more often to this vivid song more frequently after the April 2011 timeframe, this was around the same month that I enjoyed the good fortune of being able to attend one of her concerts. One of the reasons why this song stays in my mind multiple years later is because of the daring energy of the song.

Fever Madonna

Fever by Madonna-I started to more frequently listen to this song by the early 2000s when I was stationed in Yokosuka Japan (through the U.S. Navy) and her music relates to multiple happy memories during my time there including the connection with this smoldering and memorable song.

Circle In The Sand Belinda Carlisle

Circle in the Sand Belinda Carlisle-I am very lucky to have actually heard this song by the time I was 7 years old on local radio around the time I had heard her Heaven on Earth song. I then started to get into this song much more after the late 2007 timeframe after purchasing one of her greatest hit music collections that contained this Circle in the Sand song. One of the reasons why I enjoy this remarkable song is because this song makes me think of a connection to a destiny andor mystical type of situation that appears to be implied in a creative way with this song.

Work Freemasons Radio Edit Kelly Rowland

Work (Freemasons Radio Edit) by Kelly Rowland, I confess that I actually became aware of this exhilarating club song after hearing this song via a UK music import of the Now 69 music collection that I purchased by the 2008 timeframe.

Chocolate Kylie Minogue

Chocolate by Kylie Minogue-I’m fortunate to have seen a music video to Chocolate by Kylie Minogue online by around the January 2004 to June 2004 timeframe and I have enjoyed this captivating song every since.

my husband is the one who played a major influence in why I started to listen to the music of Kylie Minogue more often starting around the timeframe of 2002/2003. This song Chocolate by Kylie Minogue is a masterpiece of a song that I remember first hearing by early 2004 when I was 23 years old and living in California. This song also reminds me in a blissful way of my husband who helps encourage me to be more than just the best wife I can be yet also a woman who is in the process of learning to be more in touch with my intuition, self confident, and resilient.

Dangerous cascada

Dangerous by Cascada-I luckily heard this song by the 2011/2012 timeframe via one of her music collections. The music story of how one person can have such a strong effect on the heart despite being very “dangerous” makes for enthralling music.

Wildest Dreams Taylor Swift

I am lucky to be previously familiar with Wildest Dreams by Taylor Swift because I had purchased her 1989 music collection by around the December 2014 timeframe. This creative song leaves it open-ended in a clever way why the romantic partnership was meant to be temporary from the start because at the beginning of the song the lyrics suggest/implied that the music/song narrator already saw the temporary vibe of the love affair even before it began though it leaves it open why this was known ahead of time. However the lyrics no one has to know what we do definitely seems to hint at some taboo, controversial andor forbidden partnership with some rebel person type of character maybe/possibly similar to in Taylor Swift’s Ready For It song from her Reputation music collection.

High On Life DJ Encore

High On Lifeby DJ Encore-A beautiful dance song that appears to be about being around someone who has a healing andor creative inspiring effect on someone’s spirit. I feel lucky that I had the opportunity to obtain the music collection containing this during when I was in my 20s.

Falling Into You Celine Dion

Whine Up Kat De Luna feat. Elephant Man

Like A Prayer Madonna

Like a Prayer by Madonna-I am blessed to have originally heard this moving/meaningful love song by around the 1989/1990 timeframe though I admit to only intuitively being at least somewhat aware of some of the meanings of the Like A Prayer song after the 2016 timeframe for some. A dynamic song about how being in love with someone can be almost like a powerful spiritual experience.

Number 1 Goldfrapp youtube comment from 11 months ago

I like the electro and club vibe energy in this song Number 1 by Goldfrapp. I luckily first heard this song around the 2005/2006 via online.

Feel Your Love Kim Sozzi

Feel Your Love by Kim Sozzi-I am very lucky to have first heard this original dance/club love song that is Feel Your Love by around the March 2011 to July 2011 timeframe. Even multiple years after enjoying it I still have yet to make out the full meaning of this song, I am wondering if this song symbolizes either expectedly andor reuniting with someone after a long time span- 5 years andor longer-and pretty much telling them that you are ready to start anew with forgiveness. Regardless of the Feel Your Love meaning, the vocals are astonishing and the music and the music video have a vibrant energy even with the element of the night time lights in the music video.

Gods & Monsters Lana Del Rey

Gods and Monsters by Lana Del Rey-This is a music gem that I have to admit that I am previously familiar with after first hearing it via Lana Del Rey’s Born To Die Paradise Edition by around the November 2012 timeframe. Her soulful vocals and passionate energy in this song creatively transform Gods and Monsters into a song that could appear to have multiple meanings because of the abstract yet make a music listener think type of lyrics.

Youtube comment from 7 months ago

Gods and Monsters Lana Del Rey-I admit that I became familiar with this song after the November 2012 timeframe when I purchased her Born to Die Paradise music collection. Still years later, I confess that I find the push the envelope vocals and daring indie dance music fun to listen to with Gods and Monsters by Lana Del Rey.

The Dolphins Cry Live

Possum Kingdom The Toadies

Come On Barry White

How Deep Is Your Love Bee Gees youtube comment from 2 weeks ago

I have my amazing husband to thank for indirectly influencing me to love this one of a kind song that is How Deep is Your Love by Bee Gees, he recently was singing this song out of the blue when I was already in a happy mood, I find this song to be very beautiful even if I am still trying to intuitively and logically determine if this song is from the male perspective, and yes I do show my sweet and handsome husband how much he means to me multiple times because I intuitively understand that there are multiple other women who also would be happy to do the same though that is something for another post.

Do It Nelly Furtado

Ooh Ooh Baby Britney Spears

Break The Ice Britney Spears

Cyclone Baby Bash T-Pain

Like A Drug Kylie Minogue youtube comment from 8 months ago

My creative intuition/intuitive heart is influencing me to honor my husband with this love/dance song that is Like a Drug by Kylie Minogue. I truthfully purchased the music collection by Kylie Minogue in late 2007 featuring this song and I got into this Like A Drug song more by the 2008 timeframe when I was residing in Norfolk Virginia. Fortunately my husband is encouraging me of listening to her music to this day since he was significant in influencing me to enjoy more of her music when after we first met in 2002.

Fascination Alphabeat

Pumpkin Soup Kate Nash

Take Control DJ Bobo

Come On Get Higher Matt Nathanson

Live Your Life T.I. Rihanna

Heartbeat Madonna

0 notes

roseskiesandbutterflies · 4 years

Text

Killer Queen: Chapter 8 - Scandal

Summary: Life is easy when things go your way. I know this from experience. I also know that that can disappear in an instant and that you have to be able to rely on your friends. Luckily my name is Arabella Ruth White and I’m the fifth marauder. But I want to show you the girl behind the mask. It takes a lot of work to be this fabulous, darling.

A/N: If I got any information about Diwali incorrect, please let me know so I can change it. I'm not Hindu and all of my research was done online and I dread to think how reliable that actually is. Also, happy late Diwali since it wasn't that long ago. That's a lie but let me have this, please.

Drunk Ruth is the funniest thing I've written in a while also more writers need to try writing drunk narrators for their stories because some wack shit comes out of that. Bonus points if alcohol is not featured in the scene at all. Double bonus points if you're writing in the third person. Extra double bonus points if the narrator almost reveals important events that haven't happened yet (could be used as a plot device). The drunkenness was definitely not inspired by the amount of Echo Falls I had last night.

Me?? Including my feminist shit in my stories?? More likely than you think. Please don't start arguing over abortion in the comments though, please. Thank you kindly. I just felt the need to yeet in my opinions about it after all the shit that happened in the USA.

Sorry for not updating for about six months. It is a bit ridiculous, I know, but oh well. Half-term ended up being a lot busier than anticipated and I had a lot of writer's block and procrastination when I finally got around to writing this. And I did my research and Diwali actually fell on Sirius's birthday in 1975. You would not believe how happy I was about that. If you caught the Brooklyn Nine-Nine reference I love you. The title for this chapter came from Queen's 1989 album, The Miracle.

Word Count: 3.2k+ (hopefully that makes up for the delay)

Inspiration: You Can’t Make Me Love You by -FromEden- on Wattpad, All The Young Dudes by MsKingBean89 on AO3, The Boy Who Killed God by @sirius-black-killed-god

Warning(s): talk of pregnancy and abortion, underage drinking (although it’s in the UK so it’s fine lmao), swearing

Tag List: @bhmay @briarrose26 @bijoukitty

Ask to be on my tag list! Let me know if it’s for a specific fandom(s). The full list is in my bio. Also let me know if you’re on my tag list already but you only want to be on it for a specific fandom(s) I won’t be offended if you ask as long as you’re polite about it tehe.

Never before had Diwali fell on and around Sirius's birthday. James had joked about it many a time in the past but the look on his face when he discovered the date of the next new moon in Astronomy was one of surprise and amusement. This meant Sirius's usual birthday celebrations - a.k.a. a ridiculous party - would have to be slightly altered. Not that the birthday boy minded an awful lot. He was rather fond of the traditions involved and his face lit up like the diyas themselves. The day before had been spent creating Rangoli patterns on the floor of their room, Kingsley thankfully not minding as it was part of James's culture. Also, as it had been a Hogsmede weekend, we spent the majority of the day following James around so he could buy new things for the Hindu new year. And also to get Sirius's birthday presents when he was too distracted by the games in Zonko's.

James's parents had sent a huge box fall of diyas, all varying in colour and size, that had required four owls to carry. Along with it was a lovely heartfelt letter to all of us, reminding to stay safe and revise and all that, but to also have fun with whatever we were getting up to. James definitely teared up at one point but he remained in denial. Silly billy.

Now, after knowing James for a good four years, my knowledge of Hinduism was rather extensive, if I do say so myself. So according to James, Diwali lasts for five days with different festivities on each day. This year, it had started on Halloween so as soon as we returned from our epic prank, we quickly set up with the help of a spell or two and then let James do his thing. The same pattern repeated until now, which was the fourth day of the celebrations and James's favourite day, in his not-so-humble opinion.

Last night had been spent by setting off as many fireworks as we could possibly do, using the fact that it was Diwali to our advantage. They couldn't exactly tell us off for celebrating a festival, right?

Today was the first day of the Hindu New Year so, of course, we had stayed up last night to welcome it properly. This meant we were all a little tired, especially since we woke up a little earlier too.

The night to come appeared to be rather busy so, while Peter went to get some breakfast for us all, we set up the new diyas, cleared the ones that had burned out last night and fixed the slightly smudged rangoli patterns. Once James had declared everything good enough for tonight - which, as you can imagine, took quite some time - we headed down for our first lesson of the day.

Fucking Herbology.

Sirius did, on many occasions throughout that lesson claim that since it was his birthday, he legally didn't have to be there because he was "Sirius McFucking Black and no man can tell me what to do from this day forward".

Unfortunately for him, Professor Sprout was no man and in fact a very angry woman who "will still give you detention Mr Black if you continue with that language in my classroom".

Suddenly, a petite, barn owl flew in the classroom with a letter in its beak. This could only mean one thing: an escape route. I rapidly tapped on the arms of the boys, not once taking my eyes off of the owl, "Teacher owl, teacher owl, teacher owl, teacher owl."

They all snapped their heads up to look at said owl, who was now perched on Sprout's desk. The teacher took the note - the owl took its leave - and she read it carefully, squinting. A look of both gratitude and distaste made its way onto her face. Definitely for one of us, then. The boys seemed to think the same as I was met with excitement and intrigued looks when I turned to them.

"White!" Sprout's voice boomed throughout the greenhouse, holding up the letter. Groans of disappointment rippled throughout the class and people started going back to their work. She handed me the letter and I opened it without haste.

Dear Miss White,

Please go to my office right away. This is a matter of urgency. You are not in trouble but this does, however, concern your family.

Sincerely,

Professor Dumbledore.

P.S. I have been rather fond of chocolate frogs lately.

Now, unsurprisingly, I had received enough of these notes in the past to know that the whole chocolate frog thing was just a hint for the password. Not very subtle but oh well. The matter at hand was obviously what the fuck this was about. I wasn't in trouble for starters which was, quite frankly, weird. A million possibilities ran through my mind as to what this could be about. It involved my family and was serious. Did someone die? Merlin forbid it but at the current state of the wizarding world, I couldn't help but consider it. It was certainly a possibility, as much as I wished it wasn't.

"What does it say then?" James asked in an extremely disheartened tone.

"I need to go and see ye olde Dumbledore. Doesn't say why," I started packing up my stuff to leave.

"Someone's in trouble!" Sirius said in a sing-song voice that made me want to punch him in the face.

"No, it clearly says I'm not in trouble, you dickhead!" I yelled as I smugly strolled out of the greenhouse.

"Bitch!"

"Twat!"

"Prick!"

"Wanker!" I ran out as quickly as I could after that, leaving Sirius to get into trouble with Sprout. That was my birthday present for him. I practically sprinted to Dumbledore's office, every cell in my body bursting with curiosity. Once I arrived, I pretty much fell into his office from pure exhaustion. Exercise and I were not on good terms. I picked myself up from my mostly ungraceful entrance to see two people already sitting opposite the headteacher.

"Ah, Arabella, glad to see you received my note. Take a seat," Dumbledore greeted me and gestured to the chair closest to me. I cautiously took it and only then did I get to finally see who I had the pleasure of having this meeting with. None other than the Head Girl and Boy. Or otherwise known as my cousin and her boyfriend. Melanie and Filip. The golden students of Hogwarts. Everybody idolised them and for good reason. Seemingly perfect, they were the Athena and Apollo of our school. Smart but not bookworms. Kind but not pushovers. Beautiful but not vain. So it was no surprise to anyone when the titles they held were bestowed upon them. I, for one, did not believe in soulmates but Melanie and Filip came pretty damn close. Melanie was the daughter of my mother's twin sister. Two years older than me although I think I had corrupted her more than she had me. The type of cousin that you only saw once in a blue moon but when you did, all hell broke loose and you had the time of your lives. I knew very little of Filip but his reputation of being an all-around nice guy preceded him for miles. Their presence was some form of comfort to me because I couldn't possibly be in trouble if they were here too.

"May I ask what this is about?" I looked around the room for it had fallen silent. Melanie uncharacteristically refused to look at anything other than her lap. Filip was gazing off into the distance as if he was a model. Dumbledore was just being Dumbledore so no changes there, not that I expected any.

"Melanie, would you like to explain?" the headmaster asked to which the girl in question frantically shook her head.

"I can't," her voice, no louder than a whisper, broke halfway through. My heart instantly dropped, this couldn't possibly be good. She was usually so strong, so independent. I didn't recall ever seeing her cry so this must be a big deal. Filip grasped her hand and squeezed it tightly.

"Filip?" Dumbledore tried a different strategy.

Clearly struggling with his words, he ended up just murmuring, "Melanie's pregnant."

And so it seemed that even the finest china you had ever seen could be chipped. Misfortune would always be lurking somewhere in the shadows, ready to strike at any given moment. Nobody was ever safe from it, not even the few angels who walked among us. Out of all of my friends, Melanie would be one of the last I would suspect of being pregnant. This list of friends included my male friends so that was saying something.

But at the same time, who was I to judge her? It wasn't as if I was a virgin either. That ship sailed a long time ago. She was allowed to do whatever (and whoever, if you know what I mean) she wanted. Providing she wanted this to happen. Not the baby but the cause of it. Some people can be absolute twats sometimes but if the father was indeed Filip, surely that wasn't the case.

Regardless of how it occurred, they now had to work out what they were going to do about it. Would they be expelled? Arrested? They were both 17 and therefore adults in the wizarding world. They would be fine, right?

"Ari?" Melanie spoke up, audibly calmer than before and much more like the Melanie I knew and loved, "Say something please."

Only then did I realise that my rather extensive thought track meant that I had not yet said anything. "Sorry, I just- what are you planning to do about it?" That was my top priority for I needed to know how to support her. I couldn't care less about her decision but I did care about her.

"Wait, you're not mad?" relief visibly flooded every cell in her body like a waterfall. I hated that she had been expecting anger and disgust when I would never be like that towards her, even if I wanted to.

"Darling, of course, I'm not mad! These things happen, OK? I just need to know what you want to do about it."

She bit her lip and exchanged a quick glance with Filip, who had been gradually relaxing since I had first spoken, "We're not sure just yet if I'm honest. I was wondering what you had to say on the matter?"

"I will support you no matter what," I answered truthfully, "You want to have the baby? You have the baby! I will be that aunt who corrupts it as much as possible and you know it. But if you're not ready then just abort it! No one will hate you if you do, it's just a fetus the size of a grain of rice for crying out loud! It's entirely up to you, my dear."

"Well said," Melanie smiled slightly. Dumbledore cleared his throat and we all turned to him.

"Just as Arabella kindly put it, you do indeed have the choice. The baby won't be due until August and, seeing as you will no longer be at Hogwarts by then and will both be 18, you hold the right to keep it."

A long, rather awkward silence ensued, which was understandable given the situation. Melanie's glazed eyes told me she was deep in thought but a small, impatient part of me just wanted to break her from her trance, shake her up and down and yell at her to make a decision. I told myself to shut the fuck up because this was a huge decision to make and could potentially affect the rest of her life. Regardless of her choice, this would become something that would certainly loom over everything for a while at least. Besides, it was easy for me to tell her to hurry up because I wasn't going to be the one to raise the damn child. Or children. Twins were common in our family. Luke and Rhea for example. And my mum and Melanie's mum too.

"I'm going to keep it," Melanie whispered. I almost missed it due to the voices inside my head. I still didn't believe it.

"Really?" I asked, sounding a lot more incredulous than I intended.

"Yeah, I, sorry, we," she squeezed Filip's hand back, "We always knew we would have kids after Hogwarts, so why not get a head start?"

I had to admit she made a valid point and, if the look on Filip's face was anything to go by, this baby would grow up having two loving parents. Though, I couldn't ignore my instincts screaming at me to stop her, to tell her that this was a bad idea, to tell her that this wasn't going to go according to plan because nothing ever does. Even while I watched Dumbledore promise to hide the pregnancy. Even while I watched their faces of glee at the realisation that they were going to be parents. Even while I said my goodbyes and left the office. Even then I stayed silent. Because who was I to try and control my cousin's body?

*********

The second lessons ended for the day, Minnie collected James so she could take him to the Mandir in Edinburgh, as worship and seeing family was an important part of Diwali. He wouldn't be back until after dinner so we spent the time 'studying' to get Remus off of our backs and then set up for the party later on. Without Sirius looking of course. Although I must say getting him to bugger off for a while was easier than expected and may or may not have involved an extreme game of fetch. Let's just say that Snivellus wasn't all that pleased to find me lobbing his beloved textbook down the stairs.

All of the stairs.

Personally, I found it hilarious but Lily had a slight difference of opinion. Even when I tried to defend myself and call it my other birthday present to Sirius.

Regardless, it got one of my crackhead friends out of my hair for a while. We managed to hang banners from the ceiling, enchant a disco ball to whizz around like a not-as-dangerous bludger and cast a spell that meant glitter would just hover in the air to give the common room a glitzy feel to it.

Perfect for Sirius's sixteenth birthday. Although that concept alone was a little hard to comprehend. The fact that he had the mental age of a six-year-old was seriously convincing me that his birth certificate was wrong. That would explain a lot except he was still a fucking tall bastard. Although seen as I was only five feet one, everyone was tall compared to me. Apart from Alice, the fucking midget. She may or may not be only half an inch shorter than me but that half an inch made all the difference ('That half an inch made all the difference': title of Marlene's sex tape).

Moving on, the party itself started at around 9 so as to give everyone enough time to get ready. In that time, I managed to throw on a silver glittery jumpsuit with flowy legs and matching heels, do my hair and makeup and put on my accessories; all of which take longer than you first expect. An animated look was painted onto Sirius's face when we gave him permission to open his eyes and see what we had definitely put effort into creating for him. 'Permission' seems like a strong word until you learn that we had to hex his eyes shut to prevent premature peeking. We know him too well.

We had David Bowie records blasting from my poor record player all night, and while I tried to sneak in a couple of Queen ones every now and then, James just reprimanded me, saying that "it should be up to the birthday boy" and that "I would get my turn in a few weeks anyway". To which I did what I do best and sulked next to the drinks table by myself, thinking of ways to piss James off that I would almost certainly forget by the time I was sober. I was coming up with ways to fuck up the wanker's beloved broom while having a few gulps of what I believed was firewhiskey, when Remus approached me, tension oozing from every part of him. He grabbed the rest of my drink, downed it all in one go without a trace of a grimace, before turning to me and huffing deeply.

"What's up, buttercup?" Okay, so I might not have been entirely sober enough to deal with can-and-will-kill-you-if-you-do-so-much-as-breathe Remus but I'd be damned if I didn't give it a good go. Besides he wouldn't dare murder me. He loves me but he's bloody terrified at the same time, the same goes for pretty much everyone now I think about it.

Okay back to the issue at hand. Remus just gave me one of those looks that pierces your soul so sharply that you have to look down to make sure you haven't just been stabbed. Once I got past that armour of I-know-your-entire-life-story-and-I-would-sell-it-for-half-a-pizza-and-a-milkshake, I found a look of such hopelessness that I found myself unwillingly sobering up slightly, "Darling, what's going on?" I leaned in, knowing full well that he was going to be as quiet as possible with his reply. God, I know too much about these crackheads.

Of course, I was right with this assumption as he mumbled, "I got into a fight with Idania," he looked at me with a sorrow that I wasn't used to seeing in any of my friends, let alone at a party.

But I could only see red because I don't care you the fuck you are if you hurt any of my friends then you better fucking pray for your life. Jaw visibly clenched, voice dangerously quiet, "Where is she?" My temper was inches away from bubbling over when he didn't respond, "Where the fuck is she, Remus?"

I made to move, tunnel vision without even knowing what happened, but he grabbed my arm first, an iron grip from years of stopping me from launching punches at certain people, "No, Ruth. I wouldn't let you even if I knew where she was." He stared at me in a way that was scarily reminiscent of McGonagall and I knew I couldn't just leave him like that.

"What happened then?" I was trying my hardest to calm down and decided that my best shot was to drink some more.

"She saw some of my scars and asked where I got them from and I wouldn't say and it just escalated from there. What was I supposed to say? There's nothing you can say in that situation that won't worry her," he sighed and gulped another drink down.

I furrowed my brows, concentrating on thinking of a solution, though nothing came to mind. He had a point after all, what do you say when that happens? It all comes down to violence in one way or another and you can never not stress someone out with a cause of pain. "She'll come round if she's worth keeping."

A tiny flicker of hope danced in his eyes, minuscule but still there, "I hope to Merlin you're right."

"Honey, same," I pushed a cup of something into his hand and grabbed one for myself," But for now, we can get pissed off our asses and worry about this tomorrow. Sound good?"

"Oh fuck yes."

#marauders #james potter #Sirius black #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #marauders headcanon #marauders imagine #marauders fic

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