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extasiswings · 3 years

Text

Get in, clowns. We’re going to the circus. On ao3.

Eddie’s palms are sweaty.

It’s warm outside, the sun beating down on the park bench where he’s sitting, but it’s the nerves that have his hands clammy as he turns his water bottle over between them.

When Buck had walked in the house earlier, he’d taken one look at Eddie and rolled his eyes before shoving him back into his bedroom.

“You can’t wear that,” Buck said, rifling through Eddie’s dresser. He emerged with Eddie’s tightest pair of jeans and shoved them at his chest before turning to the drawers with shirts.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” Eddie asked, baffled as he looked down at himself and then, skeptically, at the jeans.

“You look like a dad.” Buck’s voice went muffled for a moment before he made a noise of victory and pulled out a deep red, long-sleeved shirt that Eddie’s pretty sure is at least a size too small.

“Kind of hard not to. Since I am one and all. That’s not exactly a secret.”

��Yeah, but you can look like a hot dad who is making an effort instead of a regular dad going to the grocery store or something. You’ll thank me later.”

After Eddie had changed and walked out of the bathroom, Buck’s face shifted—Eddie could have sworn his eyes darkened, that his voice was rougher as he pronounced Eddie much better.

So Eddie knows he looks good.

But his palms are still sweaty. He uncaps the water bottle and takes a sip more to have something to do than because he needs it. And then he starts drumming his fingers against his thigh, needing something to occupy them, some way to move.

He’s tempted to pull out his phone, to reread the latest texts from Bobby or even the shameless teasing in the group text that Buck started with his sisters—and boy, was that a mistake, putting the three of them in touch, because Eddie never in a million years would have told them he was going on a date if he hadn’t done it by accident because Buck’s direct messages happened to be right below the group—

He’s still not sure he should be, is the thing. Dating. He still feels like he can’t quite breathe right when he thinks too hard about it. Can still play that last dinner with Shannon over on loop, from her asking for a divorce to the implication that really being with him again would be so terrible she would have to run for the hills and leave their child behind.

He didn’t exactly have great self-esteem to begin with.

Eddie wipes his palms on his jeans—he’s in the middle of debating whether it’s bad parenting to make up an emergency involving your kid to get out of a date, when—

“Eddie! Hi,” Ana greets, walking up the path.

The anxiety in his chest twists tighter as he gets up from the bench and waves.

“Hey. You, uh—you look really nice,” he says, because it’s true and also the easiest thing he can remember from the last time he did this.

Ana smiles. “So do you.”

There’s a pause that lingers a little too long and then they both start trying to speak at once, cutting off abruptly when they realize. Eddie rubs self-consciously at the back of his neck.

“Should we walk?” Ana offers, nodding down the path where it leads into the trees.

“Sure, yeah,” Eddie agrees.

It’s actually not...bad. She asks him about work and that’s a safe enough topic that he’s comfortable spending a few minutes telling her stories from the station. She shares a little about the challenges of virtual teaching. And then she asks about Chris, and, well, that’s an easy subject—Eddie could talk about Chris all day.

He just finishes the story about the actual building of Christopher’s skateboard—which involved no small amount of comical trial and error on the part of two decidedly not Chris-sized grown men—when Ana gets a thoughtful look on her face and glances sideways at him.

“Can I ask you something personal?” She asks.

Eddie rocks back on his heels and hooks his thumbs in his pockets. “Sure.”

“How long has it been for you?”

Eddie’s eyebrows shoot up. “Since...the last time I dated?”

Ana nods.

“Well…” He wets his lips to stall. “The last person I dated was my wife. And I’m not sure it was really dating in the same way after we were married so...I guess...eleven years give or take?”

He laughs and he can hear the edge of self-deprecation. “That obvious I’m out of practice?”

“No,” Ana says. “No, that wasn’t—it’s really not actually. Although it does explain some things.”

“Things?”

She bites her lip. “Nothing bad,” she insists. “Just—”

“Have you ever been on a date where the other person talked about their ex the whole time and it was kind of obvious they still had feelings for them and you couldn’t help wondering why they weren’t with the ex when they clearly wanted to be?” She asks.

Eddie blinks, scrolling back through their conversation trying to think—he’s pretty sure he hasn’t mentioned Shannon except for the once. And he’s not still—

“In high school, maybe?” He answers. “But I’m not sure—”

“I was trying to figure out if you and Buck ever dated,” she clarifies, and Eddie stops in his tracks, his mind shorting out as he takes that in.

“I—what?”

They’re back at the parking lot anyway, and although they could take another loop around the park, Ana stops by the closest bench and smiles as she leans against it.

“Look, I like you, Eddie,” she says. “And if I’m totally off base and you want to see me again, I will definitely pick up the phone. But if I’m not? I couldn’t not say something.”

“Buck’s my best friend,” Eddie replies. His head is swimming but it surprisingly doesn’t feel bad. More like he’s been handed the clue card for a puzzle he was trying to solve and while the pieces haven’t quite come together fully, they’re getting there.

“You talk about him like he’s your partner. Like the three of you are a family. And when you talk about him you look like…” Ana shakes her head and laughs, but it’s not unkind. Just soft and maybe a little longing. “I would love for someone to look like that when they’re talking about me. Thinking about me. So, I thought you should know. Just in case you didn’t.”

Another puzzle piece falls into place and Eddie sucks in a breath.

“I do like you,” he says.

“Yeah...but you’re in love with him. Right?” Eddie’s quiet and Ana nods.

“I’m gonna go,” she decides. “This was nice, for the record. Maybe we can do it again. As friends next time.”

“Ana—” Eddie calls after her. When she looks back over her shoulder though, he’s not sure what to say except, “...thank you.”

“Let me know how it works out?” She asks. “I’m a little invested now.”

Eddie laughs and runs a hand through his hair. “Yeah...sure.”

He drives home in a daze, so much of the past two years—maybe even longer—suddenly thrown into new light. Everything he’s been afraid of, everything that’s been holding him back—all of the baggage and insecurities that Shannon left behind, that have made him feel like he’s not good enough, like he can’t be a partner to anyone—

He never stopped and looked too hard at what he already had. What he was already doing.

What he has. What he is doing.

With Buck.

In the stark glare of hindsight, it’s easy to see—he was still married when they met, was worn down and bruised and not looking for anything. He needed a friend and Buck slipped in to fill that void and Eddie...put him in a box. Put them in a box. Carefully compartmentalizing every aspect of his life because it was easier that way, because it allowed him to sort through the tangled knots of expectation from any number of other sides, any number of other identities—husband, father, son.

There was no baggage attached to friend. No forgive and forget and take your wife back because kids need their mothers or you’ll drag him down with you or I wasn’t enough.

There was just...Buck. Present. Supportive. Caring about him. Believing in him. The real him—masks off, walls down, warts and all.

The longer Eddie thinks, the clearer things become. His mind flips through memories like a scrapbook—panic attacks and phone calls at two in the morning, nights on the couch playing video games with Christopher and the slower, lingering moments with just the two of them after they put him to bed, all those months sharing a bed in Buck’s apartment while he despaired over being away from his son and Buck reminded him he was a good dad—

How many of those nights had Eddie wanted to kiss him? How many times had he felt that buzz under his skin, the whisper of it would be so easy, only to shove it down because it was too dangerous to deal with.

And when he thinks now about the future, about having someone in his home, in his bed, in his life, when he pictures it, all he can see is Buck.

It feels right.

“I love him,” Eddie says out loud, tasting the words on his tongue, letting them linger.

I love him.

His pulse spikes with his anxiety, but it calms down as he sits with it. Because he knows Buck’s not going to leave. He trusts that. Buck’s seen him at his worst and none of that has ever driven him away. So maybe…

Eddie’s mind flicks back to earlier in the day, to the dark heat in Buck’s gaze as it dragged over him before he looked away.

...yeah. They’ll be okay.

He’s home before he even really registers and takes a few slow breaths before he shuts off the truck and gets out. When he steps through the door, it’s a strange feeling. The space is familiar but not. More...settled somehow. Home.

Home.

Eddie closes the door behind him and follows the sound of running water to the kitchen. He stops in the doorway, leaning against the frame, and spends a moment just watching Buck scrub potatoes in the sink until the other man glances up and notices him.

“Hey,” Buck greets. “Chris is reading in his room, I’m just working on dinner. How was the date?”

God, I love you, Eddie thinks, and nearly has to bite his tongue to keep it to himself.

Yeah. It’s right.

He shrugs. “It was fine. Ana’s nice.”

“When’s the next date then?” There’s an odd note in Buck’s voice that makes Eddie push off the frame and step closer.

“There’s not going to be one,” he replies. “Ana’s nice...but I don’t want to date her.”

Buck stops. Shuts off the water and turns, leaning back against the sink.

“No?” Buck’s brow furrows. “It’s not—do you still feel like you’re not ready?”

“No, it’s not that,” Eddie replies. “I do think I’m ready. But with the right person.”

His heart is pounding in his chest, but it’s not fear. More...anticipation.

He swallows hard.

“Ana said something that made me realize that...I don’t want to start from scratch with some stranger.”

Eddie takes another step closer and Buck inhales sharply, emotions shifting across his face too quickly for Eddie to name them all.

“Eddie…” Buck sounds hoarse, a little disbelieving. He leans forward for a moment before shaking his head, clearing his throat.

“I can’t—I need you to be specific,” he says. “Because I can’t make assumptions here, I can’t—”

Eddie kisses him. Steps in far enough that Buck’s body presses flush against his, slides his hand around the back of Buck’s neck, and kisses him. Buck makes a small noise and grips him right back, his hands curving around Eddie’s hips nearly tight enough to bruise in sharp contrast to the way Eddie’s mouth feathers against his, soft as anything.

“Specific enough?” Eddie breathes, staying close enough that their lips brush again. Buck surges up and uses his grip on Eddie’s hips to turn them, pinning Eddie against the counter as he kisses him again in response. Once, twice, three times, and Eddie shivers.

He hasn’t been kissed in so long, hasn’t been touched with intention like this—he’d forgotten what it felt like. His body floods with heat as Buck’s hands slip under his shirt, spreading wide over his rib cage, and he parts his lips eagerly for Buck’s tongue.

Down the hall, a door closes, and Buck jumps back, Eddie slumping against the counter to keep himself upright. Buck is flushed and panting and Eddie’s pretty sure he can’t look much better, too warm and electric, wanting, wanting, wanting—

Both of them catch their breath and watch the door, but Christopher doesn’t appear. After a minute Eddie catches the faint sound of a toilet flushing and he looks back at Buck.

And he laughs. It bubbles up from his chest like champagne fizz, bright and warm and right, and apparently it’s contagious because Buck starts up as well, stepping in again and sliding his arms around Eddie’s waist, ducking his head to laugh breathlessly against Eddie’s neck.

When they calm down, Buck stays close, his lips feathering over Eddie’s pulse. Eddie hums and closes his eyes as he tips his head back to give Buck better access.

“I’m in love with you,” he says. “In case that wasn’t clear.”

Buck’s lips curve up against Eddie’s skin.

“Well that’s convenient,” he replies. “Since Chris was asking me earlier why you couldn’t just date me if you were going to date again.”

Eddie’s startled into another laugh. “Really?”

“Really.”

Eddie grins and opens his eyes again. “Hey Buck?”

“Yeah?”

“Go out with me?”

Buck snorts and pushes him out of the way so he can go back to the potatoes.

“Help me finish getting dinner together and we’ll see.” But the second Eddie turns away, Buck snags him by a belt loop and reels him back in for another kiss.

“Yes,” Buck says. “Yes.”

And it’s right.

#chapel writes #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie fic #911 fic

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alkalinefrog · 3 years

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may I request your top 10 favorie lawlight fics ?? I’m really interested

AIGHT BUCKLE UP BUTTERCUP because I’ve got a lot of feelings about these! Also, people have been asking me for fics featuring:

Ryuk shenanigans

yagami sibling hijinks

whammy kids found family

----- from my bingo card I made a while back. Tbh, I put those on the list to try and manifest the energy into the universe hoping people would bring fics to ME about them lmao. I do have a couple that check the boxes though!

Also thank you to everyone who’s been recommending me fics!! You’ve all hit the nail on the head and sing straight to my heart! I’m just slow to make my way through them between work. <3

GOING UNDER THE CUT (rip mobile users)

Aight here we go, in no particular order:

“Change OR the one where L and Light get married” by @translightyagami (I’m so sorry I keep tagging you in these alsfjkalsfdj)

The one I never shut up about and am adapting part of into a comic because it’s just that GOOD. :’’’D Light and L get married in front of Watari and Light’s family back at the Whammy orphanage in England. A melancholy yet painfully sweet tale as Light and L reminisce on their history together while getting ready for the ceremony, and their first night together afterwards. Single-handedly sold me on Kira being intrinsically part of Light to boot.

“the forest holds strange creatures” by @translightyagami (I’m sorryyyyyyy I just love your stuff)

An AU where Light’s a paranormal researcher and L’s a reclusive cryptid living in the forest next to a small town. The writing has a fairytale feel to it, and the romance is so gentle. Light’s bunking at Whammy’s small little house, and Near and Mello are there as little kids pestering Light. It’s ADORABLE. Beyond Birthday also shows up in one of the extra chapters as a creepy cashier at a thrift shop for double the fun!

"Sickness” by BlueberryValentine (more fics on their fanfiction.net account!)

The ultimate hurt/comfort + fluff + angst with a happy ending fic. The first fic I read to get back into lawlight a couple months back! Canon divergence starting during the Yotsuba arc. Light is diagnosed with terminal brain cancer while still under investigation. L has to take care of him, and somewhere along the way they fall in love. It carved out a chunk of my heart but luckily filled it back up with a sweet sort of aching.

“Seeking His Hand” by magic__mind

Historical regency AU! L is a rich nobleman courting Light, a humble farm boy, for his hand in marriage. One of the most romantic pieces of literature that I have ever come across. The prose is pure poetry, and their love so pure! This one also has a special place in my heart for its portrayal of Misa! She’s A)a spy who helps L on his cases, B)totally removed from her co-dependence for Light, C)the bubbly badass she was always meant to be. 100/10 worth the read!

The “Resurrections” Series by Shadow_of_Quill

A modern Orpheus and Euridice story, wherein Light’s spirit leads L back from Hades while he’s still Kira. L is thereby present for the confrontation at the warehouse. Believing that any trace of Light is lost in the man, he executes him right then and there. However, this was a grave mistake, and Light’s soul won’t be as easily revived. (spoilers, they’re both fine in the end) ******* THIS ONE ALSO INCLUDES YAGAMI SIBLING HIJINKS. Sayu plays a HUGE role in bringing Light back!

“Is This The Way It Ends Now?” by Seastar98

The one that checks off ALL the above three boxes!! A “characters watch their own show” fic, wherein the gang receives a mysterious DVD in the middle of the Yotsuba arc. Horrified by what’s to come, Light and L work to make sure their future is brighter than the one they witness. They bring in all three heirs to watch with ‘em, everyone gets character development, and Sayu comes in like black panther in endgame yet again to bring Light back from the darkness! Ryuk pops up in the end and the epilogue and he’s great. The ultimate and most direct fix-it you’re ever gonna get.

“From the Same Star” by Nilahxapiel

This is my only pure “Ryuk Shenanigans” fic, and it’s really really sad :’’’D A short but sweet one-shot wherein Ryuk traverses multiple dimensions, dropping the Death Note at Light’s feet each time. Light and L were always fated to clash, and it’s just as heartbreaking every time.

“Primitive Liars” by Nilahxapiel

This one’s super popular in the fandom for a reason! The only omegaverse fic that I’ve liked! The A/B/O dynamics and their affect on society are super well developed, and the writer manages to keep L and Light very in character while still developing their budding romance in a believable way. This is an AU where somebody else is Kira, and Light’s genuinely helping L and the task force hunt him down. ***** Naomi Misora lives, the heirs come in, and Sayu actually hops aboard the task force!!! DUDE. BRILLIANT. I also just love the exploration of gender and identity that the author weaves in. Lots of LGBTQ rep!

“and indeed there will be time” by lawlietismyfavorite

The ultimate soulmate AU. People grow to be 18, then stop aging until they meet their one. L is the greatest detective of not only this century, but of six centuries. And then there's Light. (taken straight from the description!) The prose is absolutely breathtaking; like walking through a dream. Can not recommend this fic enough! It’s got my head up in the clouds and looking towards the stars!

“K” by Dlvvanzor

AU where Light’s a Whammy with the moniker ‘K.’ He and L grow up together along with kiddos covering the rest of the alphabet. A murder-mystery-thriller on top of the romance featuring Beyond Birthday as a main character! Light’s a pathological liar and L’s super into it. They’re the top students at Whammy’s and are tasked with solving a string of homicides happening RIGHT AT THE ORPHANAGE (guess who dunnit). It had me on the edge of my seat, and I binged the whole thing in two days.

i’mMMMM doing more than 10, this’ll just be my ultimate fic rec post 😂

“Change of Circumstances” by wordbombs

Another AU where Light’s a whammy! It’s just a one-shot though, but one of my all time faves!!! I’ve gone back and reread it so many times and drew some stuff for it a couple weeks back. Much more light-hearted than “K”, Light arrives at the orphanage at age four and meets an eleven year old L, and from there they grow up together and fall in love (the age difference is handled really well, L’s not physically present for a lot of Light’s childhood and they bond on a platonic level first). It’s one of the healthiest relationship dynamics that I’ve seen for these two, which is honestly such a breath of fresh air. Matt, Mello, and Near are there too in the background!

“Dial K for Kira” by @kiranatrix

“Light needs some easy money to finance his Kira plans, and notices there’s a big demand for Kira roleplay phone sex. So he figures, “Why not? Pretty sure I’ll be convincing.”He raises some fast cash and plans to shut the whole thing down and get back to writing names, until he gets a request from somebody who wants to “roleplay” as L....“

Taken straight from the description! It’s very VERY NSFW so be warned. I’m too shy to talk about it more alskfjdasldjf sorry BUT IT’S GREAT.

“Dance with Me” and “Birthday Note” by @dotti55fanfiction

These are both one-shots so I’m putting ‘em together! Absolutely adorable tooth-rotting fluff!! “Dance with Me” has Light and L going to a club, while “Birthday Note” features L trying to think of the best present for Light. The dictionary definition of “warm fuzzies.” (Dotti ilu, I still gotta find time to read your longer works)

“you’re a wasp nest” by raisuki (inthegripofahurricane)

Blind!Light AU! Light and L are both college students who meet when Sayu dares L to break into her house. Yagami sibling hijinksssss! Their quippy dialogue is adorable and it’s just a fun time watching them flirt.

“softly now” by smallestbird (jenwryn)

THANK YOU TO THE ANON WHO SENT ME THIS REC. The softest lawlight one-shot to finish off this list! Light and L share an intimate moment while painting their new apartment. The absolute JOY this fic radiates in a short 700 words!! Read it before bed for the sweetest dreams!

These are just my favourites, but read anything by any of these authors and you will not be disappointed! I might make a separate post later for soulmate AUs because... There’s just too many. :’D

-Alka

#Anonymous #ask #fic rec #lawlight #text #when you meet a work deadline and use the extra time to catch up on asks lol

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captain-ozone · 3 years

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Fic Writer Review

Thank you for the tag, @flutteringdreams-matw!! I loved reading your review, and I’m stoked to have the opportunity to fill this out myself, too!

1) How many works do you have on AO3? 46. And not all of them have been transferred over from FFN. There’s at least another dozen between multiple fandoms over there, lol.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 656,571. My word.

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? When one of your fandoms is DC Comics...Does that count as one or several? LOL. xD

There’s been Merlin, Danny Phantom, Batman (Comics), Young Justice (cartoon), Teen Titans (cartoon), Titans (TV Show), Smallville (TV show), The Justice League (movie), The Flash (Arrowverse TV Show), Miraculous Ladybug, Harry Potter, Rise of the Guardians, How to Train Your Dragon, Sword Art Online (anime), Blue Exorcist (anime), The Bright Sessions (podcast). Might be missing some.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 1. Come Alive (Young Justice) 2. life, if well lived (Batman) 3. On Three (Miraculous Ladybug) 4. a million dreams (Batman) 5. Genesis (Danny Phantom)

@redriotted should be informed that my top two are fics she requested from me via prompts I’m sure neither of us expected I would ever fill. Love you, dear! I credit you for these fics!

5. Which of your fic do you want more attention for? Difficult question for me to answer. I’ve been gifted with lovely feedback on most of my work. I guess if I were to choose one it would be Locking Up the Sun (Batman)? It’s a Fantasy AU. A fantastic exercise in world-building. I had so much fun with it that I’ve been playing with the idea of spinning bits of it into an original work.

6. Do you respond to comments, why or why not? YES. I try to respond to every review and comment I receive. I understand it takes a lot of time and energy for some people, but from the moment I posted my first Merlin fic in 2011, I needed to respond, even if with nothing more than a little thank you. And I’m not about to stop the habit. I met some of my dearest friends responding to reviews. I still meet wonderful people doing so. :) 7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? Uhhhh, I’m not sure? I guess it depends on perspective. Most of my fics end happily, or rather, I am quite heavy-handed on the comfort part of the Hurt/Comfort trope. I do bittersweet more often than I do angst. I wrote a Merlin AU inspired by The Picture of Dorian Gray about Uther Pendragon that was pretty angsty? Grief was another one, also in the Merlin fandom. I’m sure there were some in my FFN Merlin oneshot collection Rabbits and Bathroom Breaks that apply, but lord knows I hardly remember half of what I’ve posted in that monster.

8. Do you write crossovers? Once. I wrote a Rise of the Guardians/Frozen crossover with an Elsa/Jack Frost pairing as a gift for a friend. 9. Have you ever received hate on a fic? Oh, of course. Who hasn’t? I’ve been cursed out more than once, too. It always stings, but it’s a matter of stepping back and asking myself: is this constructive? will this make me a better writer? Once you frame the comment/review that way, it’s a bit easier to see that it’s unproductive to linger on it for long. It’s someone’s personal preferences and/or beliefs not aligning with your own. Or someone who can’t quite distance themselves from fiction enough to realize you are not always what you write, nor are you a reflection of the characters/plot you’re writing about.

10. Do you write smut? if so what kind? Rarely, and only as crack or as a joke. Nothing I would ever share in public. RIP Uther Pendragon/Troll fic of circa 2013-2014. I do so wish I’d saved you somewhere safe. 11. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, but I have no idea where they are posted or in what language. Most of the requests came over FFN, so I’m sure they’re available somewhere. In some capacity.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Not quite. My friend and I wrote every other line of the aforementioned Uther/Troll fic in a chatroom, if that counts. 13. What’s your all time favorite ship? I’m far more interested in platonic/family relationships in pretty much every fandom I’m in. If I were to choose one? Adam Hayes/Caleb Michaels from The Bright Sessions. Or Barry Allen/Iris West in The Flash.

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? *eyes Shift warily*

I KID. I made a promise over half a decade ago, and I intend on keeping it. In all seriousness: A Merlin time-travel fic I started ages upon ages ago. I hardly remember what the point of it was. There is a fun scene I’ve considered posting as a oneshot more than once over the years, though, just because it makes me laugh.

15. What are your writing strengths? Dialogue, I think? I love it.

16. What are your writing weaknesses? Imagery/action. Give me a single scene focused on a conversation between two hopeless individuals that need some TLC and let me forget about where they are sitting or if they are sitting at all or if there are things that need describing around them, please and thank you. 17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I’ve done it, in some capacity. I used my knowledge of Latin grammar from old high school classes to try to write spells for Merlin fics. I probably butchered quite a few, lol. I think it’s important to use language as accurately as possible, though, if it were to be used at all. Most of the time I take the lazy man’s route and use dialogue tags and italics, just so I can avoid making ignorant mistakes. As a reader, as long as I have translations in front of me, I’m golden. 18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? Merlin. I owe that fandom everything. 19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? Come Alive. I don’t know that I have ever had so much fun writing anything in my life. a million dreams (my Flying Grayson time travel tear-jerker) and Not a Bit (my MLB Brothers AU, inspired by the original PV) come in close second. I dig my family feels, obviously. 20. What fic are you most proud of? Shift, my Danny Phantom AU, if only because it’s been seven years since I posted its first chapter. Writing it has felt like pulling teeth at certain points, but it has been with me for a long, long time. Rereading it is like looking at a time lapse of how I’ve developed as a writer, lol. Heart of Gold (Merlin) is another. Before Shift, it was the longest fic I’d ever written, one, and it was my first time really developing an OC/attempting a redemption arc as well. It was far from a perfect fic, but boy did I feel like a queen when I finished it. I’m sure you might’ve done something like this at some point, @cdelphiki, but here you go! @breynekai-tfc, too! And anyone else who sees and wants to share, please do so!

#captainozone #ask game #my writing #fanfic #fic

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scoundrels-in-love · 3 years

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Okay, so I am going to try and write about something that I just can’t stop thinking about.

Which is, once again, Seun Gyeom’s diary. I spoke about it a good, long time ago (that’d be ep 7 or 8, I think?) here and rereading the post, it was really interesting to see what withstood test of time.

And in some ways what was actually true then but has shifted to be different now because he has grown as a person and immensely so.

Specifically, that’d be how Seun Gyeom was protective of his diary around Yeong Il but didn’t try to conceal it when Mi Joo was there. I speculated that he, in some way, had had very little privacy in his life and this was innate and simple trust, yet learning to draw borders in regards of Yeong Il. (And then I went on to extensively talk about how he’s not aware of walls he puts up and how verbal expression of care is still unfamiliar to him and something he is eager to welcome and replicate.)

And I feel like I was right, actually, even as Seun Gyeom hesitated to hand over his diary to Mi Joo this episode. Especially so, in truth.

First, he really was actually stalked and investigated by his own father and with the way that man acted, I wouldn’t be surprised if he had demanded Seun Gyeom to hand over and show his phone or some such at some point. Which, yikes on pikes.

Second, we’re back at to theme of self-love and him establishing his own person also independently from Mi Joo.

I didn’t speak of it much other than in few tags, but back when he confessed to Mi Joo, I got caught up in the way he said she gives him value. Because no matter what, it’s... It’s not great to stake your value being based on what you think someone else gives you. It’s a start, if you’ve never felt you had any, but it’s basically just shifting that task to someone better, rather than his parents or his teammates.

I bit my tongue and told myself - it’s something they will work on. And I was right. The show delivered and even more overtly than I expected. Because Mi Joo called him out directly about it. When? After their break up.

First, in the break up scene itself - he does assert himself to an extent, he gets upset that she makes him say the words instead of braving it herself, because it makes him take responsibility for it, to take her wishes as if they’re his own - which is something that his father has continuously done. He goes as far as to say it’s only mistake she’s made that night - because the rest he can understand and give it time, but this was cruel in a way he didn’t expect or wish to experience from her. But okay, I’m getting offtopic because it’s something I’ve thought about a lot.

The point is, he starts by asserting himself in the scene and then he continues with: “Let’s give each other time. It’s the least you can do for me. I think I deserve as much.” Which. WOW. Amazing. Beautiful. First time we see him saying “I am deserving of something, of being treated fairly and with kindness. and my feelings have value.” so plainly.

And then... Then he collapses a little on himself and asks her “Don’t I?”. He is still hurt, he is still angry, but he goes back to questioning because his value is STILL dependent on her on some level. He might’ve accepted on some unconscious part if she had said ‘no’, even if he had rebelled against it mentally. It’d have been a lot to overcome, in my opinion. But of course it’s Mi Joo and she doesn’t do that.

The same pattern repeats when he runs after Mi Joo and pleads her not to leave. It’s not the pleading itself, but the fact he apologizes for crying and breaking her heart with it. I went ‘oof’ immediately and, essentially, so did she. “How can you apologize even in moment like this?” Because even then, he is prioritizing her feelings and being sorry for taking up emotional space in not positive way, even though he’s breaking apart.

I truly and well think it’s what makes her say ‘you should love yourself more, for us to be in healthy relationship’ that same night. Because he still doesn’t. He’s learning, but she still is the root and the heart of his self-value and what creates any warmth he might feel toward himself.

I am not going to talk about every little moment in-between where we get to watch her nudge him toward healthier, loving mindset about himself or where he actually follows it through that we get to see. This is hella long as it is.

So. Third point, even if it’s actually still second. Him buying diary was her suggestion, him struggling with its concept and learning to write in it (with her help) was an important lesson in self-actualization. Him being protective of it toward Yeong Il, but not as much with Mi Joo, to me, felt like sign he does want to be vulnerable with her but also doesn’t know how to establish boundaries.

Something Mi Joo constantly tells him - my work and myself are the most important things to me, there’s a space in my life that is only for me and that is healthy and good and you should have for yourself!

And now that she asked for his diary, he had that belief in himself. I have something private, only mine, and just because I love her - and she loves me -, it doesn’t mean I have to give it up to her to be judged for its worth, or to share if I don’t explicitly wish to. To me, it was like him stating - I know I am truly my own person, with my own value independent of you(r affection) although it is important to me, I have my own thing that is purely my own.

It looked almost comical, how he didn’t let go of the diary and someone else might think of it as funny moment, ah pouty Seun Gyeom getting possessive of his belongings, what a cutiepie but also like stop, but to me that was such a quietly loud landmark of his journey towards self love that I quite physically can’t stop thinking about it.

Maybe it’s just me, maybe I am ascribing more importance to it than it actually has. But whenever I think of him learning to love himself, I will think of that moment, I will think of Mi Joo respecting that he doesn’t want it to be read and the long, long way the had went from that sunny day where he sat on the low wall, trying to find words for fear in his heart. And maybe I will tear up, again.

#run on #jtbc run on #kdrama #rainy watches kdrama

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aro-aizawa · 3 years

Note

1 and 42?

yesssssssss i love these kinds of questions. thank you anon for enabling me. (disclaimer: i am a fanfic writer so these’ll be answered in fanfic writing in mind.)

[the questions]

1. Tell us about your WIP!

okay i have like ten million different wips but the one i’m primarily working on is a mha fic of mine. called because i have to it’s a quirkless vigilante izuku fic, where he’s biologically all might’s son and inko and all might are qpps. when izuku asks his mom if he can still be a hero without a quirk as a kid, instead of just saying sorry, she tells him no that it’s not safe.

this fic came about when i got tired of seeing the overwhelming villain au fics. like. they’re not bad but an izuku that is in no way someone who fight villains is just...wrong to me. because to me, izuku has such an overwhelming drive and to him it’s almost a need that he helps people and becomes a hero. it’s just as essential to him as breathing. so if he were ever prohibited from being an official hero.....well this boy will not take something as silly as the law consideration. he’ll get his ass out on that street and he WILL fight those villains and save people.

so the whole fic is izuku trying to fight and prove to the world that he can be a quirkless hero. he pretends to his parents that he’s given up on that dream, but hey he knows that gen ed students can transfer in the hero course if they prove themselves........

(too bad izuku doesn’t know that his dad is on the teaching staff of ua. oh did i not mention? izuku has no idea his dad is all might.)

i’m not usually a super big fan of biological all might, but without the thread of one for all being a connector between them, i needed some sort of connection (bc honestly this was also a call out of all might’s views on quirkless ppl too). and i’m usually sort of averse for shipping toshinko if it’s solely for parental dadmight reasons, so bio dad. if i had to start over again, i’d probably adjust this to be that when izuku was little, all might officially became qpps with inko after her husband ran out on her. buuut it’s a little too late to go back and change it now, especially since originally i had it written for the toshinko to be romantic in nature, but decided i liked it better as qpps.

so that’s the wip i’m working on!!! i have a plan for it to wrap up just a little bit after the kamino arc but like.*squints at my lastest chapter which is only just starting to wrap up the first arc in the series* um,,,, that might,,, take a while lmao.

42. How many drafts do you usually write before you feel satisfied?

okay, so here’s the thing. when i was younger and just getting into writing, i’d write like. three or four drafts for each chapter. because i’d do the bare minimum on the first one, just get the action and rough dialogue in. then the second one would be refinement, this one starting to look like an actual chapter to be posted (even though i rarely ever posted anything at that time). during which, i’d always leave them for like. a few months, maybe six. when i came back, i’d see all the errors and my writing style would have changed dramatically. so time for draft number three!!! and then repeat.

but i only ever made so many drafts because i was procrastinating on actually writing the next chapter. i think the highest i ever got up to was chapter 9. when i hit a road block, i’d decide to go back and redo it all again, eventually running out of steam before i even finished what i’d already done. repeat continously until i have six drafts of the same fic but refined down to about 20k words and 4 chapters.

so! i try not to do that anymore. it just. it doesn’t work. it really really doesn’t. because that way i never get it to a state where i’m comfortable enough to post it, and then i’ll end up posting like 10 fics where i only have one chapter posted and the rest’ll be abandoned because i just cannot get the next chapter right and need to keep making more and more drafts.

when a chapter isn’t fighting me though, i tend to have two drafts technically. i’ll write out the chapter, if it’s for my fic biht, i’ll send it off to my betas and merge all their corrections into one final form, which is the final draft and that’s the one i just copy-paste into the chapter section and then reread it to make sure all my formatting sticks then post.

if it’s a non-beta’d fic, what i’ll do is i’ll have the final product, the chapter or the one shot i want to post. and what i’ll do is i’ll put the draft on one side of my screen and the ao3 upload thing on the other side. and i’ll retype everything. this way i’m going back over it and adjusting wonky sentence structures as i go, because it helps me spot more mistakes if i have to retype them rather than just rereading them. my brain has to think more abt the stuff i’m typing rather than the stuff i’m reading y’know?? plus the different fonts help! my google docs have a different font to the upload section of the ao3 page, so that is another thing that helps my brain spot issues. if you have difficulty finding mistakes, change the font. as much shit as it gets, comic sans is also a great font for this. when i’m done retyping everything out, the second and final draft is done and i’ll usually post it right then and there, bc i’m impatient and i love posting shit.

i mean. you wouldn’t expect that considering i haven’t updated in well over a year and a half but still.

tysm for asking!!!! sorry it was such a long response lmao

#ask things #anonymous #i love writing out my thought process so immediately that'll make my response like ten times longer #Anonymous

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bandrlodge · 4 years

Text

Just My Type

Bucky x Plus Size Original Female Character: Briar Hawthorne

Chapter Summary: Briar experiences 6° of separation

Chapter warnings: general buffoonery, recreational drug usage (marijuana)

Chapter One: Design Client Anonymous

Briar smirked, pulling her coffee cup from the cabinet. Another night, another Natasha one nighter. Of course, she'd hurried them out as she heard her roommate stirring. She pulled Nat's comically small mug from the cabinet as well and prepped both of their drinks. One sugar for Nat. Five sugars and a heavy splash of Coldstone's Sweet Cream Creamer, for her cup. Briar heard the patter of her footsteps down the steps as she was topping off her mug.

"Morning, Nat." She smiled, sliding the mug over. She grumbled, ruffling a hand through her thick, red hair. Briar settled back against the counter, adjusting the neck of her oversized Manson shirt before grabbing the coffee.

"So...how was last night?" Briar asked. She sipped the coffee, relishing the warm hug now rushing through her bones. Natasha chuckled and downed her mug full in one gulp.

"Let's leave it with, slimy yet...satisfying." Briar gagged.

"Fuck you, you nasty bitch."

Natasha laughed, "I've offered, several times."

Briar shook her head, "I don't fuck where I sleep."

"That doesn't make a whole lot of sense." They heard a voice call. Briar's head snapped over to our balcony door, which was now closing on a very disheveled Clint Barton. His hoodie hung off his frame, obviously torn in a fight. Clint, was a character; the only one of Natasha's group that was ever allowed to meet her. She loved him and couldn't count the number of times he'd shown up, carrying pizza and begging to rewatch Avatar. One time, he'd even brought a dog, Lucky. From that moment on, he'd had a permanent invitation and open door to their place. Other than him, no one had ever been allowed inside the apartment and in the four years she had known Natasha, she'd never met a single friend other than Clint.

For good reason though; living with a semi retired Avenger was dangerous. She never wanted to try and draw more attention to our friendship and home by bringing home extras. Well, high profile extras, according to her.

"No one asked you, bird brain." Brisr smiled. Clint perched himself beside me on the counter, snatching the half full coffee pot from its machine and taking a swig straight from it.

She rolled her eyes and simply took another drink of her own, having learned long ago any war involving coffee was a war that would never be won with Clint.

"Oh yeah, Nat, uhm...Boss wants to talk to you. Says you should probably call him, like...an hour ago."

"So, we arent gonna address the bloodied knuckles and tattered clothes?" Briar cocked an eyebrow and glanced between the two. Nat shook her head, "Probably not. I'm gonna go make this call." A moment later she was gone, leaving poor Briar at the mercy of the blonde coffee fiend.

Clint finished off the remainder of the coffee sitting in the pot and scooted closer to me, bumping his shoulder against my own.

"So, how's work going?" He wiggled his eyebrows, flashing his side cocked smile. laughed, raking a hand through my hair. Her finger snagged into a blue tendril and pulling at it absently while she answered,

"Honestly? It's fine. That's it. I expected a bit more from a high profile firm. I took two cases from the lead designer and one from a coworker at their behest, but, there isn't too much to go around." Briar had switched from a solo home design firm almost eight months before. While being her own boss was pretty much heaven, she needed health insurance and there was no way she could afford those payments on my own. So, she took the newest Senior Designer spot at Legendary Interiors and the rest was history. Even with the small work load currently, Briar was pretty lucky with them. The base pay was substantial and there was always a fifteen percent commission for Senior levels. She had her health insurance and not once had she been asked to remove her piercings, change her hair color, or cover her tattoos.

"But, I'm lucky. So, I don't wanna complain too much. Plus...you should see the room I'm working on now. The case came nameless to me, but, the space is amazing. From what I can tell, I actually have the space to do all of the projects I've come up with. The proposal is being sent in on Monday afternoon. Hopefully..." Briar took a large breath, "its accepted." Clint nudged her,

"You're fantastic, Briar. It will be" He hopped off the counter, putting the now empty pot back into it's holder and held out his hand.

"Show it to me, Smurfette."

Briar laughed at him and abandoned her coffee cup to drag Clint down the hall to the design room. She flipped the light switch and pulled him over to the light table. Rough sketches of a modern penthouse with multiple greenery patches throughout the floorplan lay upon the table, littered with various colored ink marks. Clint sat on the stool and studied them for a few moments, chiding the blue haired woman for biting on her nails whilst he was doing so.

"This is great, B. The greenery you've used is so...oddly placed but, it works."

She squealed, "That's what I was going for. The client is a war veteran with severe PTSD. I wanted him to have the modern space he requested, but...he originally just asked for a little spot in the house to retreat to. But, I put a bunch of spaces around the house. Triggers arent confined to one space. So, why should his self care depend on getting to one specific area?"

Clint nodded along with her rambling, something obviously ticking away in that big brain of his.

She smacked his shoulder softly to get his attention, "Whatcha thinking, bird brain?"

He turned to look at his friend, a shit eating smirk plastered on his face.

"I know whose space you're designing."

________<_________<________<________<_____

Bucky had sent the proposal for a new design over to Legendary six weeks ago. By now, he had hoped to see at least a rough sketch. Except for a few short email exchanges between himself and the Vice President of Design, he had no information on who had taken his project nor, what they were doing with it.

He pulled out his phone and shot a text to Tony,

'You said that design place was the best, right?'

Not a moment later: 'Yes, tin man. Who got your project? Katherine? Jonas?'

'I don't know, Tony. I haven't heard from anyone other than Camille. She didn't give my name to the designer like I asked, which I appreciate, but I don't know whose working on it.'

Bucky managed to fix himself a hot cup of lavender tea before Tony responded with a name and a phone number.

'Her name is Briar Hawthorne. She's been with them eight months and is their newest Senior Designer. Camille gave it to her specially. That's her cell phone number. I had to schmooze for that. Use it wisely, old man.'

Bucky laughed, Tony schmoozing on his behalf was still jarring. But, thankfully, the past decided to stay in the past after the Thanos affair. There was too much to rebuild and too much to cherish now, there wasn't time for wallowing in past mistakes. He sat on his bed, pulling a sleeping Alpine tightly to his side and shot a message over to Briar.

Hopefully, he could get some information on his damn apartment design.

______<________<________<_______<______<__

Briar sat on the balcony, weary eyed, and staring at the text message on her phone. She took another inhale of her joint and leaned her head back against the egg shaped hanging chair she was in. An exhale later she was typing her fifth attempt at a response to him.

She took another drag of the joint and recalled finding out the identity of her client.

Clint had laughed for a good five minutes. Chuckling at the absolute fucking serendipity he was watching unfold. Natasha had come in as he was dying down and as soon as he told her - in a hushed whisper between two very best friends - she had also spent a full five dying from laughter.

Turns out, the client was none other than Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. A.k.a. the Winter Soldier. Natasha had complemented the decision on the multiple greenery spaces for relaxtion and meditation, saying that the Sergeant would like that idea. Clint had teased Natasha about how she couldn't hog their Smurfette anymore, knowing that the team would likely attach themselves to Briar quickly.

She reread the text for the hundredth time.

'Hi, Ms. Hawthrone.

My name is James Barnes, and I am the client whose penthouse you are designing currently. I know originally I asked to remain anonymous but, I wanted to check the progress on the design. I've not recieved any sort of update.

Thank you, again. '

He seemed so formal. Briar was stuck on how to respond, wondering if she should mention Natasha or if she should just be professional.

'Mr. Barnes,

Thank you for reaching out. I apologize that you have not been provided with regular updates but, I can tell you that the draft proposal and cost summary will be available to you on your account dashboard on Monday. I submitted my idea to Camille yesterday afternoon. Please don't hesitate to reach out with any other questions or concerns.

- Briar Hawthorne'

Professional, succinct.

Boring.

She hit send and stuffed the phone down beside her thigh in hopes that the cushion on the chair would muffle the vibrations so she could ignore it should he respond. Briar finished out her joint and pulled another from her cigarette case and lit it up.

She felt the dooming buzz of an incoming message on her thigh and groaned.

It was James.

'Could we maybe meet tomorrow and go over the plans together? I would feel better going over the plans with the actual designer. Not her boss.

And call me Bucky. All my friends do.'

So, they were friends now? She chuckled and settled back into the chair again.

Meeting a client off the clock could go wrong, there was no telling if she'd face repercussions on Monday.

But, the opportunity to present her project on her terms in her words...

'Yeah, sure. I can do a full layout set up on my design wall here at the house. Just text Natasha for the address. She doesn't let me give it out. She's a weird roommate.

And call me, Briar.'

There. She threw it in.

The frustrated groan yell from inside the house a moment later meant that Bucky was quicker on the draw than she would have thought.

_______<_________<___________<_________<__

JMT tag: @sea040561 @heli0s-writes @suz-123

Thank you to you, reading this. Yeah, you. You're awesome.

#bucky x oc #bucky x ofc #marvel #fanfic #plus size character #bucky x plus size ofc #bucky barnes #marvel fanfiction

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kyluxtrashpit · 4 years

Text

TROS Review

Okay here is my extremely long (almost 4k words >.>) review of tros. And that’s without the 2k meta on redemption arcs I also have filed away lmao. First off: I am not leaving the kylux fandom. It’s not a good enough movie to warrant that. Second: I might make a post of things I wished we’d gotten later, but this is already WAY too long lmao. Warnings for spoilers, opinions, and general negativity

EXPLICIT RISE OF SKYWALKER SPOILERS BEYOND THIS POINT

So. I have watched the thing. I went in knowing the spoilers and oh boy, am I glad I did. Still, overall this movie was… not great lmao. It’s messy and the pacing is off and there are some very weird and straight up Bad moments, but I’m not actually upset about it anymore. It’s more like ‘there’s a lot to unpack here’ except we’re not going to unpack it or even throw away the whole thing, it’s just gonna become that one box that’s still packed and untouched from when you moved 3 years ago. It’s there, but you rarely think about it beyond the occasional ‘maybe I should finally unpack that? Nah, too much effort’

I see a lot of people writing fix it fic and that’s totally valid but tbh… I don’t think it’s worth the effort for me. I think I’m just going to pretend it never happened and write my kylux the way I always have. Maybe I’ll do something with tros at some point, maybe some mean!Hux + redeemed!Ben because I’m awful lmao but for now, it hasn’t changed my plans at all. Which is actually a good thing tbh

Anyway. I’ll start with the good simply because there’s less of it lmao. Best thing about the movie? Everyone in it is looking like a fucking snack. It’s great. These people have always been hot, but this movie really nailed that. Also the trio stuff was fun and felt genuine. I LOVED the hints that Finn is Force sensitive, and I liked him in this movie even though I wish he got more story/time. I enjoyed Rey at the beginning, but her actions and plotline made less and less sense as the movie went on. Kylo was fun; I had gotten worried after that interview that said he’s calm now but he wasn’t lmao, like at all, so that was good. Also I didn’t like how Hux died but I’m endlessly grateful Kylo wasn’t the one to kill him. That might’ve actually ruined the ship for me

The visuals were excellent (save that strobing near the beginning; I’m not epileptic, but I had to close my eyes because it was too much). Some of the jokes hit will, as did some of the emotional bits (Chewie’s “death” was very well-executed and Rey’s scream broke my heart). Weirdly enough, C-3PO is kind of the heart of the movie, which I did not expect at all. Lando’s appearances were too brief but good. I also loved D-O a lot and he’s very cute. I liked seeing a bunch of new planets and environments, however briefly. The acting was also really great throughout on most accounts. I really enjoyed 2 of the Hux scenes (when he’s sitting in that board meeting making a face like he’s mentally eviscerating everyone in the room and when he gets so excited to finally get to blow something up and then Kylo shuts him up with the Force BUT WITHOUT HARMING HIM!!!)

That’s kind of it tbh. The movie overall is really messy. I’ve seen people say it feels like a fever dream and it really does. I’ve seen descriptions of people dreaming the plot of tros and they’re less weird. The pacing in the first chunk is way too fast and there’s way too much to take in. Then things get weird in the middle. Then, well, that ending. It feels like it’s trying too hard to be liked. It’s ‘joke’, ‘reference to past movie’, ‘joke’, ‘reference to past movie’, ‘mention of hope without showing it’, etc. etc. on and on throughout it. Some of those are fun, but it got tiring very quickly. And it made it impossible for me to suspend disbelief long enough to actually get into it

I also saw a lot of reviews saying if you didn’t like tlj, you would like this one. That was not correct. I disliked this for many of same reasons I disliked tlj, but it also managed to hold tfa’s weaknesses as well. Honestly, tros feels like the worst aspects of tlj mixed with the worst aspects of tfa, mixed with way too much nostalgia and then blended up with a good heaping of mania and desperation to keep it going. It tried so hard, wanted to be liked so badly, and you can feel that watching it. It doesn’t feel genuine

It also feels like every single movie in the ST was actually from a different trilogy. None of the 3 connect to each other. You can’t say tros is a successor to tlj or tfa; it’s totally on a different path, which I’m honestly not sure how they managed that. As much as I felt tlj wasn’t a true continuation of tfa, tros feels like its own trilogy mashed into one movie. There wasn’t one consistent plot or character thread to follow between all 3 movies

I think bringing palpatine back was the first fundamental mistake. It didn’t fit. And after creating Kylo and Snoke to be very specifically Not Sith, why bring the Sith back all of a sudden? Palpatine has had his day and he didn’t need this. No one did. Much as he was creepy as hell and that was well done, it didn’t feel right to have him there. Also, I really don’t like the implication he procreated at any point skdfjskldjk

As for Rey… I know I’m in the minority here, but I never found here to be a good narrative foil for Kylo. The connection between the two doesn’t really interest me at all (and this was one of the reasons I didn’t like tlj). It worked better if they were related, which was the biggest reason I was a proponent of Rey Skywalker, but that didn’t happen. The commonalities they have are just: 1) can use the Force, 2) have been lonely. The contrasts are: 1) light vs dark (sort of; this is less explicit in tfa and I miss that greyer view of the Force) and 2) had a family vs didn’t. And that’s pretty much it. In order for 2 characters to contrast and hit the ‘complimentary opposites’ sweet spot, you need much, much more than that. Finn has and always will be a better foil for Kylo and it’s a damn shame they abandoned that in tlj and even more so in tros. I have more thoughts on her that I’ll get to later too

I did like Rey in the beginning, but the longer it went on, the less I could rationalize her actions. Why is she doing that? Why is she trying to ditch her friends all the time? Why does she heal the cave snake? Why does she stab Kylo when he’s just become a non-combatant? Why does she heal him after? Why is she trying to reach out to the spirits of past jedi? Why did she Do That after she wakes up in the end? Why did she then seem to not even care that Kylo died right after? None of this is explained. Show, don’t tell, is great, but you can’t just make massive leaps like that. I didn’t get it. None of this felt like the character I’ve gotten to know over the last few years, nor did it feel consistent within the movie itself

That said, I want to discount one complaint I’ve seen: I got no impression she’s exiling herself on Tatooine at the end. It’s very clear she’s just doing a quick funeral ritual for Luke and Leia. The Falcon is still there, ready for when she’s done. I don’t get where the ‘she’s all alone in the desert again forever and ever’ comes from because it’s clear she’s not. It’s just a private ceremony (plus obvious fanservice). That’s it

For Finn: I liked that his character got to be a lot cooler here. I’m sad that he didn’t get half the attention and plot he deserved, but at least he wasn’t treated as a joke and a coward. My tlj complaint for Finn was that he went through the exact same arc he did in tfa over again; here, he doesn’t. He’s clearly grown into himself. That I liked. But damn, he was supposed to be a main character and he really got sidelined hard. It’s also very clear finnrey was planned at some point but didn’t end up in the final cut. The tease with that felt cruel tbh. He deserved to get to tell Rey he loved her on screen

And Poe: Poe was okay in this one. He felt to me like a different character in tfa and tlj, but this one managed to mesh the two characterizations well. He’s a bit of a hothead who doesn’t think (tlj), but he also really cares about people and is trying his best to lead (tfa). That was very successfully done. However. Poe is the one character with the most backstory. He’s got novels, comics, all of it. Where in the fuck is this history of being a spice runner in all that??? Sketchy as hell to make your one Latino character being a drug runner but you know. It also felt like a HUGE retcon of the one character that actually has fully revealed backstory. Also his thing with Zori was just weird and forced and exhaustingly heterosexual. Completely pointless tbh

As I was rereading this, I realized I forgot Rose but really, that’s because she does pretty much nothing. She has very few lines, never comes along. It’s like they forgot she was there. Or just didn’t care. It was really sad and a huge disrespect to everything KMT has gone through. Both her and her character deserved more

For Hux: I liked the 2 scenes I mentioned above, but other than that I was disappointed. I said this on twitter already, but the biggest crime they committed was getting rid of his fanaticism. Tlj may have turned him into a joke, but at least he was still a zealot. Here, it’s clear he gave up his last fuck like a year ago. It’s 9 am and he’s had 6 glasses of wine because he’s lost the will to live and it’s all pointless. Might as well fuck around and give the Resistance info that might lead to the end of everything he’s worked for his entire life because nothing matters and at least Kylo will lose. That’s dumb and violently ooc. I get him being a traitor to Kylo, I am DOWN for that, but not to the FO. He cares about the FO. He is fanatically devoted to the FO. That was ridiculous and wildly out of character. Also the FO is just gone in favour of Palpatine’s fleet as soon as Hux dies? What happened to them? Are they still out there? Who even knows? WHAT A FUCKING WASTE

Also Pryde? Fuck that guy and fuck JJ/LF/Disney for thinking it’s okay to have an old imperial kill Hux. Especially since the visual dictionary today confirmed Pryde knew Brendol and our Hux had known him for years. The possible implications are gross as fuck. If anyone was going to kill Hux one on one, it should have been Finn (with a wonderful stormtrooper rebellion arc involved) for the sake of both characters. I’m personally going to choose to believe Hux was wearing a blaster proof vest (thank you, Delilah Dawson, for putting those into Black Spire as canon) and faked his death. He’s living in blissful exile with Millie now or rebuilding the actual FO and ready to take over as the Emperor he deserves to be

Oh and Leia’s scenes did feel weird. I appreciate them trying to incorporate her, but it didn’t quite work. I feel like having her be offscreen yet present would’ve worked better than most of what they used. Some worked better than others though. I also have some Thoughts about her death but I’m about to get into the second half of the movie stuff and I’ll cover that there

Now Kylo. My darling, sweet, disaster boy. So. Okay. I knew no matter what happened his end would be controversial. And I have a lot of feelings on redemption arcs that can be distilled into one thing: if they’re written well, I like them, no matter how much bad the character has done; however, they are almost never written well enough. One of the first things I said coming out of tfa back in 2015 is ‘that’s going to be a disappointing redemption arc in a few years’. It was never about what ending I wanted (I actually favour something more grey than simply ‘oh he’s good now’ or ‘dies evil’, but that was way too ambitious for them to attempt so I never bothered to hope for it), because I knew it was coming. So this didn’t really bother me beyond the fact that it was too sudden. I do blame that partially on tlj, because it took Kylo from conflicted and torn apart to ‘yeah, I’m in charge now’, but I still think this was not the way to do it. Anyway. I have a 2k word rant somewhere about redemption arcs and when they work and when they don’t that I never posted and this is the much, much shorter version of that

Also. Okay. One more thing on this. So I usually don’t like redemption arcs because they’re written badly, but my least favourite redemption arcs are those that end in death. The only one I can think of that actually worked was Vader’s, but it doesn’t work as well with Kylo. Why? Because redemption is about making amends, not being punished. It’s about choosing to stop doing bad shit and instead to do good things to make up for what you’ve done. In self-sacrifice, not only does it send the message that the only path to redemption is death, but also it means you do literally one thing and then die. That’s it. One good deed, die, you’re done. That’s too fucking easy. True redemption is waking up every single day, for the rest of your life, and continuing to choose to do good. You know that evil is easier, feels better; you’ve done it. But you’re making the choice to keep doing good and to make amends instead. And you do that for years. Decades, even. That is SO MUCH harder to do than just one good thing and then immediately dying without showing if that change is lasting or not. That is how redemption is achieved: in making that choice not once, but again and again and again. So yeah. I didn’t like that. Death redemptions aren’t convincing to me because one choice is easy; consistently making that choice over the rest of your life is much, much harder

End of point: if they were going to redeem Kylo, he needed to live and work to make up for his past mistakes in order to make it impactful. It’s a damn shame he didn’t

Also: having Leia die for the sake of a man, son or not? FUCK THAT. And, even worse, if we follow the movie’s logic: Leia died trying to reach and save her son. Which lead to… him dying anyway?! Which means Leia’s death is meaningless and she died for literally nothing. Fuck that. FUCK THAT. What the fuck. That’s bullshit

Again on the redemption: Kylo just… kills his good friends the KOR without a shred of hesitation? Also the KOR literally never speak? And Kylo says literally one word (‘ow’) after the redemption? I admit, it was fun watching him fight and also watching him get hurt. If I ignore the context of it, watching him crawl out of the pit, scrabbling on the ground, so hurt he can’t even stand up? Fuck. That was good shit tbh. Also those big, desperate puppy eyes. They’re even worse with him as Ben instead of Kylo. Bravo to Adam for playing such a convincing sad boy. I hate that his scar got healed though; I liked it

Now. The whole ending and the plot stuff. Rey being a palpatine is… okay. Fine. I don’t like it but whatever. Seems like an unnecessary excuse to bring him back. Also Luke and Leia knowing? How? Luke knew Rey for literally 1 day. And how would Leia know? And why not tell Rey, who was so desperate for answers to her past when they thought Palpatine was dead? It makes no sense. It’s just very unnecessary. Not to mention the line “you’re a palpatine” is not a thing any real human being would ever say, jfc that was clumsy and unrealistic dialogue. I don’t mind Rey going a bit dark for some time, but this was not the way to do it. Also I was really hoping for a resolution beyond ‘dark siders dead, light sider alive’ because the dichotomous nature of the Force MAKES NO SENSE. Balance is needed. Leaving the only Force user alive a light sider means something dark will come again for the sake of it – Rey should’ve gone grey and tbh tfa made me hope this trilogy would end with all surviving Force users grey. So that was disappointing

Now. The kiss. Straight up: I do not ship it. I don’t mind if other people do, but I do get touchy when they go out of their way to prove there’s nothing inherently problematic about it. I ship kylux; it’s problematic as hell. That’s a good part of why I like it. So I’m fine with r*ylo shippers as long as they do the same. Problem is: most don’t and go around insisting it’s actually the highest romance possible while leaning on incredibly misogynistic and racist tropes to prop up that argument rather than accept their ship has some questionable parts to it (like kyluxers do). It’s more a problem with the fandom for me than it is the ship in theory. Still, I don’t like it and that’s what matters for this

The fact of the matter is it felt extremely sudden and out of place. The entire first half of the movie is Kylo being an aggressive, creepy asshole to Rey. I can theoretically entertain the idea of Kylo having feelings for her (though I don’t), but I cannot see the other way around, not when Rey has so many kind, wonderful people around her. Which is why this feels so weird. There was not enough build to it. I saw a cam clip off reddit before I went in, so I had accepted it was happening but I expected a lot more lead up to it to make it not seem so sudden. None of that was there. There was no build up or reaching of understanding so it reads exactly like those versions of it I dislike: there is nothing wrong with a man berating you and insulting you and attacking you and you should love him for it. That is not enemies to lovers. That’s just abusive bullshit

And then the death. Both of them. Rey dies from… what exactly? It’s never shown at all. And same with Kylo. The leaks said it was Force exhaustion, which a) why? And b) that’s not clear in the damn movie. You need to explain things!!!! And also that means Leia, Luke, Kylo, and Rey all died (even if one didn’t stick) from using the Force too hard. Meanwhile Darth Maul survives getting cut in half and Palpatine survives falling down a shaft in a space station that explodes 2 minutes later (and, you know, all the wacky Force shit he did in this movie too). The fuck? It’s dumb. I hate it

Also the dyad thing was weird. I know the early leaks had it more explained, then the leaks said they cut it, but now it looks like they left in 3 lines of dialogue with it and cut the rest. Again, explanations people! This is not a thing in previous canon! Maybe in the EU, but that’s not canon anymore! The fuck!!!! The idea is dumb and forced to begin with, but the execution made it worse

And now for the final, largest criticism I have. A confession: I am not a star wars fan by nature. I’ve always liked them, but I preferred other sci-fi more. I’m more of an invasive species who forcibly carved my way into this fandom ecological niche because I really loved Kylo lmao. But if there is one thing star wars is defined by, I don’t think it’s love or family or any of those common themes people say. It’s hope. That’s the thing star wars does well. Even when things are darkest, it keeps the hope alive and it makes you feel that. Good will triumph. There is reason to believe in heroes, even when they stumble

This movie is not hopeful. Rogue One, a masterful tragedy, still manages a message of hope despite every single lead character dying. This one doesn’t. And tbh, I think tlj missed on this a bit too (a lot of talk about having hope, not a lot of showing us reasons to be hopeful), but it was still there. Tros does not feel hopeful. The Skywalkers are all dead. Rey has decided to download the legacy (why? No idea! The whole message was ‘don’t be afraid of who you are’ and she just then decided to become someone else? Makes no sense!!!). Anakin’s sacrifice meant nothing because Palpatine came back (and it is CRIMINAL we never got an Anakin and Kylo scene). Han and Leia’s and even Luke’s (a bit) deaths meant nothing because yeah, Kylo turned back in the end, but then he died anyway. They all gave their lives to save him and it was all for nothing. He’s still dead. Palpatine is gone and so is his fleet, but what about the FO fleet? Are they still out there? Are there brainwashed stormtroopers still trapped in its clutches (also, they were so close with Jannah and Finn to adding depth here, but nope, the stormtroopers are still cannon fodder in every fight scene even though they’re literally slaves!!!!)? Who knows!

This movie only feels conclusive in that so many characters we love are dead. That’s it. There’s more questions than answers and so much left unresolved. There’s no sense of hope in it. There’s barely a sense of victory. It’s not satisfying. Even the celebration at the end feels weird and like it’s trying to force you to be happy. The jedistormpilot hug was good, but the lesbian kiss was such a cheap attempt at trying to appease people calling for representation. The moment with Lando and Jannah at the end was probably the most hopeful part of the movie and neither of them are lead characters

Idk. I know this is pretty negative. But I didn’t really enjoy this movie. Some parts were fun, or funny, or exciting, or emotional. But overall? No. This was not a satisfying conclusion for any of these characters, either the new or the old. They missed. Hard. Not one character was truly done justice. And it’s disappointing. But it’s over now and I have no intentions of letting it dictate my fandom activities. I’m just going to pretend it didn’t happen and call it a day

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blacknpurplewarpster · 4 years

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[IDW Skywarp Headcanon]

More about his awful comments/attitude towards others

I know I’ve written about this before but I cant seem to find it anywhere on my blog. I was rereading the original comic series and thought I’d elaborate a little bit more than what I had previously wrote. I was going to include a snippet from Unicron #2

Skywarp: “Among others. Could you try bumbling into trouble a little closer to the mainland next time? This was decidedly inconvenient.” Helix: “I think he means ‘Glad you guys are okay. Sorry it took so long to reach you.’ Isn’t that right, Skywarp?” Skywarp: “I suppose. I would have been more annoyed if we had come all this way and they were already dead.” Helix: “Do you actually know when you’re being awful?” Skywarp: “Almost always. Fortunately, showing up and being remarkable are more important to being a G.I. Joe than unnecessary human pleasantries.”

Skywarp mentions that he knows when he is being awful with his comments and just overall to others when Helix calls him out on it after just saving part of his team. This team he has been with for a few years and is close to them, even Rock. Going through the comments, he makes snarky ass comments towards Rock and doesn’t give a shit about what his friend thinks either. I’ll come back to Rock in a bit here. Some of his comments towards Rock are rather hilarious in the way Skywarp is portrayed doing them. Not to say Rock deserves his shitty attitude. But later on, they become better and closer friends.

Even though he is no longer a Decepticon, he still puts duty above everything else, even if it means stepping on others toes or hurting others feelings. Thing is, Skywarp doesn’t care. He feels being blunt is better than beating around the bush or sugarcoating things. He will tell others straight up what he feels and doesn’t give a shit about what it might do.

Another example is he even says this to Thundercracker, whom he hasn’t seen in a decade or more.

Thundercracker: “Last time I saw you, you shot me in the face.” Skywarp: “Eh, you deserved it.”

Like jeezus straight to his face. I think it was like the second sentence he said to Thundercracker after not seeing him for YEARS. Like harsh much?

So pretty much no one can hide from this. The one thing I have noticed, his snarky comments seem to back off once there’s a tighter bond between himself and whomever else. This happens once Skywarp has a change of heart once he realized how Rock and himself are a lot more similar than he thought. Rock repeatedly tells Skywarp about being alone but he finally realizes this at one important moment. Rock decides to own up to his mistakes of paralyzing Grand Slam and wants to sacrifice his life to blow up the Fatal Fluffies in hopes to get rid of his guilt but its also a sense of pride from him. Skywarp decides to stay back with Rock and decides to stay even when the detonator goes off--surprise surprise, he saves Rock and their bond grows close.

Here’s some of their conversations between one another just to show you: You can skip all the way down to see my final thoughts.

---------------------------------------------------------------- GI Joe #1: Rock: Hey, uhh, Skywarp… I was wondering… seeing as we’re teammates… you think I could ride back with you? Skywarp: Are you asking me…to open up my cockpit… and allow you to climb inside of me? Rock: Umm.. yes? Skywarp: Jets off Rock: Looks like I’m with you again.

GI Joe #4

Skywarp: “Look at them. Squabbling in the dirt like… like insects! They can’t do anything. They can accomplish nothing… without me!” Rock: “Hey Skywarp… Instead of waiting for transpo, I was thinking that if you don’t mind, maybe we could.. you know.” Skywarp: Squints hard and jets off Rock: “Jerk.”

Gi Joe #5 Skywarp: “Tell me… you geeks got your data…?” Skywarp: “This isn’t working! I’m tired of you insects leaning on me! Why am I the only one— GAAAH!” Covergirl: “Don’t worry, Skywarp…the calvary’s arrived!” Skywarp: “Now you cowards show up, after sending me ahead.” Rock: “Hey now… I offered to ride with you.” Skywarp: “You know my feelings on that.” Skywarp: “Are you even helping at all?!” Rock: “Honestly? Not really. But if you’d let me ride with—ooofh-!” Skywarp: “Gahhh!” Covergirl: “Skywarp! Come in! Do you read us?!” Skywarp: Khhkkthhhkkt Rock: “Skywarp! Are… are you ok?” Skywarp: “kkhkt No…But I will be there once we will that thing. Were you getting emotional, you sentimental insect?” Rock: “What? I was… No…”

GI Joe #6 Skywarp: “Hrmph. I’ll be the judge of that. Crude ugly thing. If this is the best you can do, no wonder you can’t fix me.” Roadblock: “Four Joes. Skywarp counts.”

Rock: Turns into this monster from the Fatal Fluffies Skywarp: “I know what this is really about...” Rock: “Hunh?” Skywarp: “...You’re sad I wouldn’t give you a ride. But don’t worry, you’ll get what you want...When i carry you out in pieces.”

GI Joe #7 Skywarp: Is fighting mega-Rock and knows to be gentle and junk. “You are as arrogant as the rest of them! Even enlarged! even with horns and claws! You are nothing but an insec--Urlkh--!” Is being choked out.

Skywarp: “Hey! You watch your mouth!”

Rock: “I know. That’s why I’m volunteering. I’ve done enough damage more than enough. Let me redeem myself please.” Skywarp: “Sure but you aren’t going alone. Someone needs to defend your position while you set up the bomb.” Rock: “But I.. I threw you into the mole pod. the explosion was..” Skywarp: “Yeah, so another one doesn’t scare me much, besides...as soon as the bombs in place, before you hit the button... I”m getting out of here.”

GI Joe #8 Rock: “Almost read! You gotta jet!” Skywarp: “You’ll be overrun before you can hit it! Besides...It’s an honor to stand by your side. You are a true warrior.” Rock: “No...I’m a Joe. We both are.” Skywarp saves Rock by letting him ride inside of his cockpit in order to get away from the blast.

Gi Joe #9 Rock: “He wouldn’t let me use the radio.” Skywarp: “You haven’t earned the privilege!” Rock: “Whatever. You ready for the blast beat?” Skywarp: “Do we have to call it that?” Skywarp and Rock: “Yoooooooo Joooooooe!” Rock: “Thanks to Skywarp! Hes letting me ride with him!” Skywarp: “Once! Only once!”

GI Joe First Strike #1

Skywarp: “You need to get him his own jet!”

Scarletts Strike Force 1 Rock: Skywarp, I”m serious! Seriously! Doc: You know he’s the only one who can put up with your grouchy metal butt.. Skywarp: I thought you liked-- Doc: Nope Skywarp: .... Fine Rock: Hey! Piggyback ride! Skywarp: Start using that shotgun or I’m doing barrel rolls!

---- This is where Skywarps attitude really changes. -------

Rock: And they were chanting this name...glub? golob..goolub? Hey! Are you even listening to me? Skywarp: Its a boring story about something that didn’t actually happen! Why would I listen to it?! Rock: Because it’s stressing me out, man. It felt...different.. Skywarp: Different from your other dreams? Rock: Yeah dude Skywarp: Different from your Jem dreams? Rock: Come on man.. Skywarp: A holograms fan. You’re not metal. Rock: They have some serious riffs, alright!?

Scarletts Strike Force #2

Skywarp: Can you fix my teleportation? Or are you techgeeks just as worthless as everyone else in the Lemuria? Rock: Dude, I’m standing right here. Hey man can I help? Grand Slam: I’ve got it Rock. You only ruined the bottom half of me. Skywarp: Getting m teleportation fixed is the only reason I threw in with you insects! why havent you fixed it yet? You’ve been trying and failing since the EDC! Grand Slam: Like I told you: We don’t have the tech, or the knowledge. or the materials.

Scarletts Strike Force #3 Skywarp: Yeah. Me. And you’re welcome. Don’t act so shocked. you insects think a giant robot doesn’t know his way around a rudimentary geothermal generator? You’ve been recruited. We’ll rendezvous in DC. You have three minutes to find yourselves a ride before surveillance is back up. Helix: Aren’t you letting people ride inside of you now? Skywarp: Only Rock ‘n Roll!

Unicron #2 The first set of quotes goes right here in events wise.

----------------------------------------------------------------

This is the end of their interactions. I know I didn’t show everything but it shows a huge chunk of how you can see how Skywarp is only “nice” to Rock really because in his optics, he isn’t respected by some of the others, especially Grand Slam. So in his mindset, why does he have to be nice if he doesn’t have the respect?

He figures he lost his respect towards Thundercracker (or rather TC lost respect for Skywarp) because of what he’d done to him so he resets back to being an ass. He thinks their history doesn’t matter anymore, so he resorts to just tell him straight-up. Perhaps he was always straight up before their meeting with Starscream and he’s resorting back to his normal or preset attitude/maturity. That all of what has gone on from him shooting TC out of the sky onwards, smacked him so hard it woke him up from this “fantasy.” If that makes sense?? I’m tired and rambling.

Deep down, I truly believe he cares but he isn’t going to show that side. He needs to put duty before anything else because that’s the motto Skywarp lives by. You can see a lot of this change in him throughout the entire series but it really sets out from AHM series onwards. His whole attitude flips and starts to really develop his character and we see this. I have a feeling he didn’t used to be like this but what he’s done in his life has shaped him to act in this way. Perhaps its a way of not letting others get close to him. It might very well be a defense mechanism. Who knows, we truly won’t know canon wise since the series ended.

THANKS FOR BEING HERE FOR MY HEADCANON AND RAMBLE OF THOUGHTS.

#[IDW Skywarp Headcanon]#//beware long af post

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m00nslippers · 5 years

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The past is coming back to wreck Jason’s new life, in RHATO Issue #33

We knew Essence and the All-caste were coming back, from the solicitations/previews, but I don’t think anyone saw the second blonde love interest’s appearance coming. We probably should have though, since this whole comic is just throwing out everything people liked about Rebirth RHATO (Biz and Artemis) and bringing in everything from the New 52 run except what people liked about it, (namely Roy and Starfire being Jason’s besties). So...I don’t know, we’ll jump into this.

It opens on Essence, in the Thousand acres of All, going to see Ducra, or maybe her ghost. She’s supposed to be dead, I thought, but these All-Caste people seem to be able to communicate/exist as spirits. Actually I thought they’d pretty much been wiped out? I am really fuzzy on the All-caste stuff I need to go back and reread New 52 RHATO to refresh my memory, it’s just hard when the art is so consistently BAD after the first artist leaves that I can’t really stand it.

Essence implies that Jason is some ‘great darkness’ and it was a mistake to teach him. Which people have been saying about Jason since Stalin wrote him with the whole ‘bad seed’ thing so, sure, okay. Jason having the potential to be some kind of ultimate evil is actually cool in the sense that it acknowledges Jason is badass and competent enough to be a threat to heroes, which I like, but the idea that Jason would ever be evil is head-shaking to me. But Essence honestly didn’t say much about what’s going on but that Jason is the problem, so there’s no point getting mad about it yet, we’ll see how that develops.

We go back to the Iceburg lounge with Jason talking to Cobblepot through the fish tank wall, the usual “you won’t get away with this!” and “Oh but I already have!” and blah blah blah. It’s revealed the wall can go opaque and show a scenery to disguise the room behind it or it can be clear so Jason can see in, and there’s a little remote that controls it, and I’m already anticipating Suzie or Miguel finding the remote, pressing it and finding Cobblepot there and being outraged. Suzie might not be that outraged, I’m not sure, but Miguel probably would. I’m not sure if there’s a speaker too, because it’s clearly soundproofed since Cobblepot can’t hear out after he presses the button, some kind of Jamming system, he calls it. Which is basically elevator music. Should have learned to read lips, Cobblepot!

But Cobblepot, as it turns out, has some contingencies in place for if he drops off the radar, in the form of two shadowy creeps cutting fish at a production facility. The fact that he thinks his D-listers stand a chance against Jason is honestly adorable.

In the office, Miguel waxes poetic a moment about how he’s feeling all fulfilled and such, running the Casino. It’s maybe a little weird? Like if you said this guy was brainwashed right now I’d be like, yeah, I see it. I don’t think he’s actually brain-washed though, I think he’s just being set up to be really disappointed when he finds out his new situation is built on Jason keeping Cobblepot prisoner. It seems like Miguel is the ‘people-pleaser’ type. He feels most fulfilled when he’s being helpful. As a hero you save people, sure but people are also blaming everything you can’t fix on you, and you don’t get a lot of contact with the people you save after the fact, so being in a more mundane job where he can see the fruits of his labor actually probably fits him better, especially with a good boss like Jason.

And Jason seems to be a good boss, we see. He trusts his employees to do their jobs, isn’t breathing down their necks, acts friendly and positively to them, is concerned for their well-being and they can come to him with problems without him taking it out on them. He really seems to be good at being in charge, actually. People prop up Tim and Dick to be such great leaders, but they both act aloof and sarcastic and sometimes even take out their frustration on the people around them. They aren’t great leaders, in my opinion. They’re great tacticians and they’re very charismatic so people want to listen to them, but they actually are very frustrating leaders to have for their teammates a lot of the time. Jason does have the same bat-weakness as they all do though, in that he keeps secrets that he probably shouldn’t keep from his teammates and I think that’s what’s going to ruin this whole gig.

Let’s take a moment to talk about the art. It’s the same colorist we’ve had, who has been doing a great job, but we went back to the artist who’s been doing things since Dexter Soy left, and while I do like him, I’m a little disappointed. He does great bodylines and shadows and proportions are very good, I like the way he did Cobblepot’s nose super exaggerated, but...I really miss cute Jason’s face from the other artist last issue. In profile Jason looks okay sometimes, all the Su girls look great and most of the other characters too, but in front and three-quarters views it’s very strange and angular, I don’t like it. Also his hair isn’t fluffy and nice, it’s slick and spikey. Oh well, the art quality is still high and I appreciate all the work put into it, I just don’t personally like how Jason is being drawn, but It’s still better than the buzzcut, in my opinion.

But speaking of Jason, he looks awesome in the white, black and red tux, I love it. Jay in formal-wear, always nice. And walking through the casino floor he suddenly spies...

Isabel! Which I was surprised and actually kind of excited to see a little. For those who don’t remember, Jason went on like, two dates with her in the New 52 RHATO. She’s an airline stewardess and basically her thing is she’s minding her own business, runs into Jason and she ends up picking up alien guns and shooting people, and taking it really chill. And this happened more than once. They seemed to decide that Jason constantly being in danger meant they couldn’t really date, since even though she could seemingly handle being in fire-fights all the time unlike most people, she didn’t want that for obvious reasons.

...but apparently she changed her mind.

I personally am pretty committed to Jason and Artemis being a romantic couple in the canon, and I do not want to see him get back together with Isabel, but I do like her and I think she’s mostly good for Jason. This is going to be kind of interesting though because Jason also had a relationship with Essence, who is obviously going to show up later on. Honestly, the ideal situation is that at the end of the arc, Essence and Isabel are in the same room and Artemis drops in from a portal and returns, and all three sit around comparing notes about Jason and he’s just terrified.

But as they are in the midst of their fancy kiss, the casino gets attacked by Penguin’s contingency bozos. Jason says, “I’m not in the 'doing something’ business anymore,” which is kind of confusing to me? Like I didn’t think he was ‘quitting’ being the Red Hood, per se. Or maybe he genuinely thought he was, and he could do everything through his casino without being Red Hood anymore. I don’t know. But we all know Jason won’t stop 'doing something', in particular shooting people who have it coming. So I’m not sure if he’s outright lying to her, or it’s just strange wording. But also, where the heck is Wingman in all this?

So, the people who show up are the ‘Five Aces’ who I have never heard of. I’m assuming Lobdell didn’t just make them up for this, but maybe he did, I’m not sure. What I do know is there are four aces in a deck so there being five aces is confusing. But the Su sisters are on it and fight these guys and I actually really like the Su sisters, they are each of them very cool, even if Candy is sort of a discount Harley Quinn. They are all very snazzy and badass and I’m glad they got a redemption of sorts by teaming up with Jason.

One thing though, is they treat Suzie Su like she’s freaking invulnerable? She gets hit with arrows and an axe and doesn’t even bleed, like what? Clearly she has invulnerability and maybe some super-human strength, but no one has mentioned this ever, so...

The fight is pretty good, all the ladies got chances to be badass, the art was easy to understand and looked clean. And it’s actually nice to see people just straight up shoot someone, like we don’t need to make this complicated, just do the obvious thing to take them out, yeah? There was no blood, which felt unrealistic and a little insulting. The sisters take out four of the five aces, and I think at least three of them are arguably dead, since one got shot to hell, one had a bomb stuck down his pants and the other got his face blown up. The guy stuck in the diamond/ice might be alive but if you tell me the others are later I’m gonna call bullshit. But all this leads to the sisters remarking that this might be a diversion to take out Jason which...

Jason is running around with Isabel and she remarks, “Oh you’ve really changed,” which, no? Jason always tried to get Isabel out of the situation first, if I recall? This is perfectly in character for how he has acted towards her before. She was always the one who insisted on jumping in with him I think, but I guess she means him delegating and not jumping in too. But he only had Roy and Starfire before so he didn’t really have a choice back then. I don’t know, I guess maybe there is a subtle distinction, but the way I see it, before he stayed involved to help his friends and here, the Su sisters are paid employees who should be able to handle things on their own, and there’s a bunch more of them and their fighting the dregs of the villain bucket. It’s the situation that has changed, not Jason himself.

At this point the fifth ace appears, takes some shots at them, and Jason says, “Hold my beer,” for no goddamn reason. This line really put me out of the story. He’s not even holding a beer, or anything at all for that matter, the line in this situation makes no sense. Lobdell, stop forcing memes or whatever into Red Hood comics. I don’t like it. Yeah, Jason is sarcastic and quippy on occasion but he’s not this pop-culture geek you have suddenly started insisting he is? Like that’s Tim or even Dick, it’s not Jason, okay? Also, this situation might have been funny if he actually was holding a champagne flute or something? It’s a casino, he could reasonably have been doing that before. Or he could have handed her his jacket, I don’t know, then maybe the line would make sense. It would still be dumb, but at least it would make sense.

But anyway, Miguel uses his brick powers to save them from getting shot up and hands Jason a suitcase--the “security protocols”, which contains his Red Hood outfit. Apparently this was not actually a thing set up by Jason himself, Miguel did it. So give this guy a raise, Jason, he’s really going above and beyond for you over here. I’m thinking maybe it’s not that Jason has totally stopped being Red Hood, just that he is trying to avoid being him in his casino to keep the connection between Jason Todd and Red Hood a secret, which makes sense.

It turns out the fifth ace guy is one of the All-Caste, which considering the fancy swords and the fact that there are only four aces in a deck, makes sense. Jason calls him out and it’s reiterated that Jason is the ‘chosen’, the last disciple of the All-Caste.

They fight, the guy spouts some stuff about how Jason never should have been trained and all that jazz. Jason remarks that people are always trying to make him do things their way and he’s more or less sick and tired of it. Which, you can’t blame him, no one who ever tried to train Jason seemed to have his interests at heart, even Bruce really. They just wanted a biddable little ninja boy.

So that all goes down and Jason literally turns the guy to dust, that’s just what happens to All-Caste and Untitled who get killed I guess, they turn to dust because they’re ancient. Suzie is all worried about Jason which is kind of nice. Like someone actually giving a shit about Jason is honestly a novelty, no one in the bat family ever seems to wonder if he’s okay, Biz and Artemis gave him lots of space and just assume he could handle himself, only Roy and Starfire cared at all and Roy is dead now. So yeah, seeing someone rush in, worried for Jason, kind of endears me to Suzie. I know she did messed up stuff in the past but I’m sold, okay? If she goes back to being an irredeemable villain I’ll be really disappointed.

But the real important thing is Jason hides that he took out the other intruder. He isn’t mentioning the All-Caste stuff to her, or maybe anyone, he could tell Miguel and Wingman about it later, we don’t know. All I know is that it’s in character, Jason tries very hard to keep All-Caste/Untitled stuff to himself and the Caste and not involve outsiders, but I know for a fact it’s going to blow up in his face somehow. It all worked out with Roy and Starfire but I don’t see it going so well here.

And that’s it. This issue was a lot of set up, there was good action, a lot of stuff happened. I’m interested to see more All-Caste stuff, hopefully get some things about it explained. It was really a blast from the past and felt a lot like New 52 RHATO which...I have mixed feelings about. I was hoping or something different, that seemed to be what was happening with the Casino arc but it’s really turning a corner. It wasn’t as if the New 52 run was all bad, and I mostly like what he’s done with the Su sisters so far, but I just hope Lobdell takes the occasion to re-explain some things with the All-Caste into being more interesting or making more sense. Seeing Isabel again was a nice surprise but I personally don’t see it lasting. Everything is going to come down on Jason again and she’s going to remember why they didn’t really go out in the first place. Also, I have a personal bias for Artemis, so there’s that.

I have NO IDEA what is going on with Wingman, why the heck wasn’t he in the issue at all? He was built up as some big mystery and wanted Jason to go back to Gotham, but then he isn’t even here when stuff goes down? I hope this doesn’t turn into some loose end that never gets explained, but we’ll have to see.

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rycewrites · 5 years

Text

lookism rant #1

so... it’s spring break. and i’ve spent the entire break doing what any smart ap student would do: ignoring my five looming ap tests and draining my phone battery by looking at webtoons and instagram. since most of my favorite webtoons are on hiatus, i have resolved to rereading my favorites, and one that i’ve reread the most so far is lookism. as spring break comes to a finish in two days, i decided to get my life back on track and instead of simply rereading the comic, i will rant about my most and least favorite characters starting with the fandom’s all-time favorite character (yes, if you check the wiki for lookism there is a poll and it is fact that he is the majority’s favorite), jay hong/hong jae yeol. (also, note that these are my opinions so if you disagree with them don’t be offended but i would be happy to hear other people’s opinions on the webtoon! please comment who would be on your list because i need to talk to more people who read lookism!)

top favorite characters~

1. jay hong/hong jae yeol:

let’s just list off reasons why everyone loves him: he is well-dressed (even plans out other people’s outfits), generous (gives daniel literally everything he wants), selfless (he fricking took in enu’s pups even though he is scared of dogs), RICH (main reason for kouji’s admiration), strong (manz uses his systema well), and CAN RIDE A MOTORCYCLE (yes, i love a man who can ride a bike). he may not be the most dynamic character, but his static puppy status makes it impossible for me to put him lower on this list. we honestly don’t know that much about his backstory and i am super curious about why his family relationships are so strained (except with his sister, joy). for now, he remains a mystery, but like an attractive mystery. overall, me -> ( ･_･)♡

2. zach lee/lee jin sung:

honestly hated this boi in the beginning because he was a big bully to daniel, but he has been through some SERIOUS character development. mira was a big part in this but i feel like overall his morals have changed so much even when mira isn’t around. he does still fight often, but now it’s not meaningless violence as he uses his boxing skills to defend his friends (ex: defending johan during the god dogs arc).

i also hated his eyebrows and hair in the beginning of the comic but like that’s personal preference. however, in the last few episodes, his hair looks SO GOOD (reference image above).

he is second on my list of favorite characters because i feel that his development throughout the story has been the most dynamic. he not only changed mentally as he overlooks lookism more (ex: he is not only friends with big daniel but also little daniel) but also physically as he doesn’t simply depend on his inherent talent for boxing but actually goes back and trains again in order to get better (to defend mira >.<)

in the future, i hope to see more development with his relationship with mira and his friends because i hold a lot of high hopes for this boi! ♥‿♥

3. vasco/lee eun tae/tabasco:

BIG CUTIE ENERGY ♥╣[-_-]╠♥! first off, he may not have as much long-term development over the course of the story like zach, but we do see a lot of his development with his own arc and bullying story. he was always a pure boi and his inherent innocence creates a discrepancy with his appearance which makes him more endearing in my opinion. the idea of lookism is very apparent in his character because most people look at him and see him as a gangster or someone very intimidating, but in reality his personality and mindset are very innocent (showing another way that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover). i honestly LOVED the scene in the god dogs arc in which he defended zach and daniel joins in because that friendship is GOLDEN. i love how he always strives to be stronger and more powerful to defeat the evil in the world because it shows that he truly cares about the weaker people and those impacted by lookism. in my opinion, i think that vasco and zach will end up being the most powerful in the story (but that’s my opinion)

4. mira kim/kim mi jin:

pure! cute! sweet! moral! (✿ ♥‿♥)! mira is just an all-around great gal that makes it impossible for me to find flaws with. although she isn’t super major in terms of daniel’s story, she does impact zach significantly and makes him a better person. like she is the sole reason that zach has become a character that i truly admire and like. (although she did think that daniel was the r-word when he tried hitting on her in the beginning of the story. but throughout the story we see that she isn’t really a person to judge people on looks and stuff as we see that she gives jasmine the benefit of the doubt even after the vasco fiasco)

5. yena/eli jang’s (jang hyun’s) daughter:

honestly too cute for words. like the episodes where zach and mira find her are my favorites so i just wanted to include her in my favorite character list. also, she seems to be a character that really impacts other characters (zach and eli really changed for her ಥ_ಥ)

least favorite characters~

park ji ho:

always doing dumb things and making it harder for the people around him. he tries too hard to be a part of the popular group and as zach said, he doesn’t really think of them as friends because he just thinks about what the benefits are for hanging out with daniel and co. i think we all went from being tolerant of jiho in the beginning and then hating him at the end. i especially hated how he kept blaming other people and yet not accepting when people were being friendly. especially during the fake bank account arc, he just brushed off daniel when he asked jiho if he wanted to go to the convenience store then jiho goes running back to daniel and his friends when he realizes his mistake. overall, -123912830/10.

2. james gong:

don’t even know where to start with this punk. very violent for very little reason! i know i stated before that i hate jiho but i still felt kinda bad for him when he realized that james had sold the bank account he made for him. just overall a very intimidating character that hurt zach (ﾉಥ益ಥ）ﾉ ┻━┻

3. jasmine huh:

needs to get her shit(ake) together. first off, she almost got vasco expelled from the school because of her lies. like big! red! flag! it seems that she really doesn’t care about other people (except james) and is willing to put so many other people at risk to save her own behind. also, i hate how she uses other people. like how she uses mira to make money when mira didn’t do anything wrong ヾ(ﾟдﾟ)ﾉ. i hope she one day realizes that her lies are gonna hurt so many other people and then herself.

4. heemin kim/zeus/creepy dude from the boot camp arc:

sexual assault is a big no in this household. i hate how he thinks that being handsome can defend him of his crimes! also, he broke zach’s arms which made me FLIP OUT. LIKE HOW DO YOU DARE TO HARM MY BOXER BOI. he also attacked mira, an actual angel ლ(ﾟдﾟლ). words can’t describe how much i hate this man but numbers can -> 0/10

5. logan lee/lee tae sung:

big bully energy. he needs to lay his hands off of everyone (especially zoe!). blackmail? big no go in this household. he also dumped his plate of food on mira? BIG NO GO! he needs to get his life together and realize that people don’t hate him because he’s “ugly,” it’s because he has THE WORST PERSONALITY!

6. strong contenders for least favorite: stalker girl, animal cruelty cat mom/hoarder, zoe’s stalker

characters that i need more information about to form stronger opinions about~

vin jin/jin ho bin:

dislike him because he abused enu but also want to know more about him. big bully energy but i feel like he has a deep backstory behind him so i want to know more. why did he quite judo? why does he wear sunglasses? hope he gets over his superiority complex and changes because i feel like he has a lot of potential.

2. eli jang/jang hyun:

so far, very cute and strong is all i have to say about him. also, he is a good dad like that scene where he put out that god dog’s cigarette? MAJOR PROPS TO YOU ELI. i’m very curious about his backstory as well because it seems that he was a contender for gun’s successor but he changed drastically to take care of yena. i also just love a man with good hair sooo…

3. jong gun + joon goo:

i want to know more about these two! like what’s their backstory? why did gun create the 4 big crews? why was goo sent to the juvenile detention center before? (look at vasco’s bullying arc for reference) why did gun leave goo alone with the money collection? overall very mysterious and i want to learn more.

random characters that just deserve appreciation~

crystal choi/choi soo jung:

we stan a strong female character. however, i don’t like how she is immediately prejudiced against handsome men in the beginning of her appearance. i think over time she’ll realize that her prejudice isn’t right and her experience as someone who has to deal with lookism doesn’t justify her immediate judgements. however, we need more female fighters in this story so she is a big yes.

2. duke pyeon:

WE STAN A MAN WHO FOLLOWS HIS DREAMS DESPITE BEING BULLIED AND JUDGED. yes, we stan.

3. daniel park/park hyung suk:

honestly, he’s a great character and all, but i don’t know if he could ever reach favorite character status. i just have a mindset that makes me unable to pick the protagonist as a favorite character because i feel like they are sometimes created specifically to just bring the story together. don’t get me wrong, he’s a great person, defends his friends, and doesn’t fight for no reason, but i feel like there isn’t anything super special about his personality (other than the fact that he has two bodies but like so does crystal). he also looks like kim seokjin in his new body which is a big plus.

4. inu/enu + inu/enu’s pups:

i love dogs

5. mary kim/idk her korean name someone help me:

strong female character? i think yes. honestly such a fav. she doesn’t take sh*t from vin jin and i honestly want to know more about her character and background. *spoiler alert* i read ahead in the korean version and saw that she can beat people up too so like… she’s a bada**.

6. kouji:

as a person interested in computer science, I STAN. i also love a man with good hair. his cocky personality is sometimes off-putting but honestly his confidence is endearing at times. also we both love money!

7. jace park/park bum jae:

during vasco’s bullying story, i was so sad when he left vasco, but i love how he realized that he should’ve been a better friend and has stuck with vasco after all of this time. also love how he listens to vasco and tries to make him happy even when he knows that vasco does some silly things (like planting durian seeds in korea)

8. zoe park/park ha neul:

i love her development! she still fights with herself over whether she should like big daniel or small daniel, which displays her internal conflict with lookism. over time she has stopped judging people solely on their appearance and she is even able to distinguish between daniel and his cousin! (in my opinion, if daniel doesn’t end up with jay he better end up with zoe instead)

9. daniel’s (hyung suk’s) mother:

ICON! WE NEED TO APPRECIATE OUR PARENTS MORE! I AM A BIG STAN! SHE WORKS HARD FOR DANIEL AND IT BREAKS MY HEART WHEN DANIEL DOESN’T REALIZE!

10. song johan:

deserved better. he was just trying to help his mom which makes him so pure! but i feel like he should realize that he has friends (zach and mira) that could help him get through his problems! overall, want to see more of him and i hope he develops even more.

#lookism #daniel park #crystal choi #zach lee #vasco #jay hong #kouji #johan #webtoon #zoe park #logan lee #jace park #mary kim #vin jin #eli jang #james gong #mira kim

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comicteaparty · 4 years

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February 29th-March 6th, 2020 Creator Babble Archive

The archive for the Creator Babble chat that occurred from February 29th, 2020 to March 6th, 2020. The chat focused on the following question:

What is the thing you’re proudest about regarding your story?

Deo101 [Millennium]

I hope saying "That I'm actually doing it, and that I'm still doing it and loving every minute of it" Is an okay answer ^^ there is a lot that I am very proud of myself for with regards to this comic, but I think I take the most pride in actually sticking with something for this long.

carcarchu

I agree with deo, sticking with it is what i'm most proud of and it's probably one of the hardest things to do

Capitania do Azar

Hah I can't say I'm proud of everything, right?

It's hard to put it in words but I really enjoy the comic making process and I'm proud of what I'm accomplishing with it, both in terms of writing and of art. And I think it's rather visible that I put a ton of effort into it

Spring-heeled Jack

I am proud that I prepped ahead of time because the last two times I tried, I didn't. Both times I got about 10 pages in and quit because I felt overwhelmed. With the story itself, I think I'm proud of my characters. Characters are the easiest part for me (plot and central conflict I always flounder on) but I'm still so pleased with them.(edited)

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

For me, it's just getting the work out there. Actually finishing chapters. compared to the first comic story I want to put out, this story I know for sure where its going and gives me a sense of ease? There's some days when I feel i'm slumping along but in the end, I'm pretty happy how it turned out. Pretty much what Deo and carcarchu said lol: my story is long but not super long, but I'm glad I'm still working on it among my other stories I want to share (edited)

Ash🦀

For me, what I'm most proud of is my artist, Katie. We're a collaborative team, I'm just the writer so I don't do much. And she takes my words and just... adds so much life to them. Seeing every page she makes is so amazing. Every time she's growing in her style in leaps and bounds, and seeing her push her lighting, expressions, and unusual panel styles, ugh, it's just so cool seeing her grow. I am so proud of her and what she's done, she's a total rockstar and I love her. I couldn't have done this without her, and every day I'm more grateful to her.

DanitheCarutor

That is a really good question, I don't really show pride in stuff I do usually. I guess the closest to being proud was either when my new comic passed the stopping mark for my old comic, which was discontinued at chapter 3, or when I got chapter 1 rescanned for print recently. The latter was kinda challenging because I rebubbled the whole chapter, and how I rebubbled was a little... awkward, pasting over the old bubbles in photoshop afterward.

Sorry! Apparently the image file was weird.

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

I actually semi-recently wrote a raving tweet thread relevant to this topic. Basically, for years and years, I did not know what it meant to be proud of your work. I've been happy with my work, both the process and the result. But was "proud of my work" completely synonymous with "happy with my work"? I legit did not know. Even asked a former English teacher friend, who's very good at explaining this sorta things, and I still didn't get it. Then as I made progress through the most recent chapter, I noticed this brand new, strange feeling welling up in me. Yep, you guessed it. For the first time ever after starting this comic, I was proud of what I was making. Not just happy with it, but proud of it. Took me a while to realize, oh, this is proud. Afterward, something happened IRL that temporarily borked my sense of time (one specific week felt like months). So because it felt like it had been months since I made it, I got to experience the last couple pages of the chapter as a reader, not its creator. And I gotta say, thank you past me, you've made something truly heartfelt, and you had every reason to be proud of this. In short: I'm proud of how my comic is an honest reflection of what my heart wants to see, what I want to read. And I'm proud of my most recent chapter being the pinnacle of that. I hope to make more, higher pinnacles down the road, as I continue my way through this story.

spacerocketbunny

I'm proud of how me and @FeatherNotes(Krispy) have shaped our characters and fleshed them out! I'm also super proud of our team dynamic and how if something didn't feel right in the story or art etc., we've always challenged it and come up with something better and stronger! Because we've been so thorough and willing to reconsider, I'm always perfectly comfortable to stand by what we've put out there, even if we've had to go back and fix past mistakes!

Mei

Hoh boy, the thing I'm proudest about in My Husband is a Cultist is the audience interaction. I've been told the comic is funny, and that makes me immensely chuffed, because it means I'm doing something right. I'm always so nervous when putting my work out there with how it's going to be received. That seeing people engage with the story and find it funny and liking the characters... it just warms my heart so much, and it makes me truly feel like I'm on the right path. I'm also pretty proud of the stuff I've written that's not been featured in the comic yet. I look forward to developing those and making them come to life, and I hope people enjoy the grittier parts of this strange comedy as much as I do! And mostly I'm proud that I'm still doing it and haven't given up yet. My lord, I just don't know how it's gonna keep going! but hopefully just onwards and upwards!

eli [a winged tale]

Reading through all of these and I’m so touched. Super proud of you all!

I’m most proud in finally chasing my dreams. Life threw me a bunch of curveballs and creating this comic is a reflection of how I dealt with things and at the same time be thankful for what I have. When I reread my comic I can see mistakes but I also see parts of myself that are genuine. I can’t wait to continue on the story and let the comic be part of my life moving forwards

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

My comic went on so long behind the scenes before I was comfortable enough to share it, so I tend to think of my past self quite differently than my current self. So, I'm very proud of 'past me!' She started the project completely unaware of how long it would last or what it would become - just a few characters and story threads and a whoooole lot of ambition - and my present self has had the pleasure of weaving those threads into a project I'm truly proud of. The comic has brought me so much joy - much of it delayed, like a ticking time bomb - and it's all thanks to my younger self. She wasn't sure of what she was doing - but now I know she made some excellent decisions in the beginning. I'm very grateful she started all of this. It's made my life all the more joyful

chalcara [Nyx+Nyssa]

I got a BUFFER. My first non-fancomic died because of work-comittments and lack of buffer, but on Nyx+Nyssa I manage to work ahead. More than anything I am proud of the discipline I developed to allow for that.

FeatheryJustice

I'm proud of almost completing Teasday. I had some long hiatuses but I will finish the story for now. Also proud of where I grown from the beginning of that story to now. The time and effort shows that I did do a lot, which makes me really happy to know.

Nutty (Court of Roses)

I'm proud of a lot of the work that goes into my comic, but what I'm most proud of was this page. I wanted this to be grand and a pivotal moment if what the comic was about. I don't think even a couple years I could've done anything at this scale, but I split the areas into chunks that I completed over the span of two weeks. Always look upon this page fondly.

eli [a winged tale]

That is gorgeous!

Spring-heeled Jack

Impressive!

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

I can point out four moments in Super Galaxy Knights http://sgkdr.thecomicseries.com/comics/ that I'm the most proud of - 1. The end of Book 1 Chapter 4. Chapter 4 was intended to be a big "growing the beard" moment for the comic's action setpieces - the first three chapters were more about introducing characters and plot elements than actual action, so I consider chapter 4 to be the first "real" fight of the comic. The way the action was presented in chapter 4 would go on to represent how action would be presented throughout the rest of the comic, and IMO I pulled it off fantastically. 2. The end of Book 1. Kinda self-explanatory, but Book 1 was the first major story arc of the comic - the fact that I managed to pull together a satisfying conclusion, something that I theoretically could have ended the comic on, was super satisfying to me. 3. This page: http://sgkdr.thecomicseries.com/images/comics/160/30997a1543363807f2141157006.gif . When I wrote in my Book 2 script "they fight for a bit in a big looping animation" back in 2016 I was hoping my animation skills would advance to the point where I could pull it off. And it turns out, they did. 4. Well... today. Ever since starting the comic back on leap day 2016, I knew today would be a big milestone, and I'm proud of myself for sticking with this project long enough to get to this four year mark.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

oh my god, that looks incredible and I've never seen a page like that before!

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

I am not very far into my comic, but when I try to think about what I am most proud of in my work, it is definitely all the behind-the-scenes work I have put into the comic. The world-building. The map-making, language developing, culture exploring, building a political structure, writing histories, character work, etc. All this time and energy I devoted to something that wouldn't be seen by others for many years to come. It is only now starting to come to fruition, despite technically having been working on this project since 2014, with the first scripts, the first character designs, and the first paragraphs about the world of Whispers of the Past. All this work that nobody will ever see. I am proud of sticking with it and putting my heart and soul into it despite the lack of return for so long. I have given up my adolescence to this project, and I am giving up the rest of my youth. But when I think about it, there is no worthier recipient. Because without this story, I feel like a large part of my identity would be gone.

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

Thank you @Eightfish (Puppeteer) ! The storyboarding alone for that animation took a week so I'm glad you like it!

eli [a winged tale]

I totally get you Cronaj! So much goes behind the scenes but that creates the world’s depths and it will resonate with readers! continues dedicating the rest of my life to comics

SL Black

@Cronaj (Whispers of the Past) yes! There is so much prep work involved. I have three full scripts for UO that will never see the light of day (mostly because they are terrible). Comics are such a marathon. All that hard work will be appreciated so much by your readers!

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

@SL Black Man... That sounds like me. I myself went through at least 3 scripts too. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way about the BTS work

Desnik

I'm proud that I'm putting myself out there with a WIP comic script and learning how to not only write, but collaborate with other writers.

renieplayerone

Im really proud that i started a comic and have stuck with it for a year and just how much ive learned by making it^^

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I'm proud that even after 70 pages I've never missed a scheduled update!(edited)

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

Awe yeee thats always good to have a streak like that!

eli [a winged tale]

That is #goals!

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Agreed!

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #comic tea party #ctp #creator interview #comic creator interview #creator babble

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onepunchmiss · 5 years

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OPM s2 e9 Live Blog

“The Troubles of the Strong”

GOSH DANG 2 HOUR COMMUTES FROM WORK I woke up at 4am just to get to work early specifically so I could leave early I could watch this episode sooner because THIS IS THE EPISODE IVE BEEN WAITING FOR FOREVER OK Ive just been vibrating at my desk all day fluctuating somewhere between ‘awerstdyfcvgbjhkn’ and ‘SADFVYNTBGVRFCE’ IM NOT mentally or emotionally prepared so WITHOUT FURTHER DELAY IMMA WATCHHHH

as always I’m watching from the perspective of someone who is up to date on the Web comic and Manga

“I know that head” *Immediatley cuts to opening theme* I SCREAM i wasnt expecting that nor am I prepared to see Zombieman not even the same 2 pictures of him that ive seen all season help my stomach is in knots and i cannot

asdfghjkl I can tell already this live blog is gonna be SOOOOO BIAS just cause IM WAITING for THE THING annd the rest is great and all but I CANT FOCUS ON ANYTHING Im really not gonna do the episode over all justice im sorry sdfghjk

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I CALLED IT IT WAS SONIC THE DOODLE WAS SONIC i was holding my breath cause I knew there was a VERY SLIM CHANCE it would be Z but i felt it in my gut It would be sonic uhg phew ok not dead yet

lol Bakuzan stopping mid boast and just screaming dude you should’ve known then and there to quit oh my god the music is SO excessive right now I’m very distracted it better be part of the gag… or not ok

Saitama just casually explaining stuff I love him so much sweetheart,,, pft “I was bored”, honestly I just appreciate how anime captures the beats every time Saitama delivers a line like that, we expect it but it never fails to make me cackle. Also, “that kind of strength should be illegal” he says to SAITAMA yeah ok

OH!!!! GENOS BB stop getting obliterated please Dr. Kuseno is old what are you going to do when you can’t rely on him for repairs and EYYY Shout out to Atomic, Tatumaki, Flash, and King for the cameos. Genos, are you really underestimating your Sensei like that?? Are you the real genos?????

OH MY GOD DID THEY JUST GIVE SUIRYU A SAITAMA FACE WHAT IS THIS CURSED IMAGE

ok in all seriousness Suiryu’s voice actor is killin it like I legit feel bad for they guy getting dragged by Saitama, U hav my respect Suiryu I still might not like you all that much but damn u makin me feel that character development

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE FACE

guys I love saitama so much be still my heart it hurts ;-; this scene chouldne be as heart warming as it is right now hhhhhhhhhhh

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PRISONER PRISONER FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFSDGFSDGS I FORGOT U WERE GONNA SHOW UP I HAVE AN ODD LOVE HATE RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR CHARACTER BUT GD ARE YOU ENTERTAINING AS HELL HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYOU BIG HAPPY IDIOT IM SCREAMING IM SO CONCERNED OH MY GOD THEY SHOWED THE BUTT RINGING I FEEL SO CONFLICTED AM I EXCITED?? SCARED?? PROBABLY BOTH

ok ok ok ok ok ok ok so now that the tournament is officially over I know theres still a lot to cover this ep before Z???? BUT my bloodpressure WILL NOT CALM DOWN cause WHAT IF they do thingS OUT of ORDER IM ON HIGH ALERT HIGH ALERT WHAT IF I DIE

OH HI KING HELP IM HAVING ANXIETY YOU KNOW HOW THAT BE RIGHT MY DUDE aw omg how are they both so cute looking right now??? WAIT also that was a smooth transition from Saitama Face™ to serious face woah ?? You know, with all that talk I wonder what the end game is for Saitama? Like, will the series end seriously or on a joke? He gonna find a real challenge or will it somehow be another one-punch? I am completely undecided tbh…

...i wanted king to finish saying “daze” so badly right thereu said yare yare plz give me the meme plz Ok the way Saitama keeps saying ‘Kinggu’ is weirding me out also ng is great and this is very nicely drawn

...plussireaditinamanga… PFFFTTT the VOICE ACTING-- King is such a good friend for Saitama really thank goodness for him ASDFGHJKL THE WHOLE REST OF THE EXCHANGE IS SO GOOD ‘OK JERKOFF’ im d y i n g

I MISSED YOU PLZ COME BACK TO THE REGULARLY SCHEDULED BEING A LIL SHIT PLZ UR BEAUTIFUL also the king movements on the bike looked pretty neato

OK Honestly though why does no one know what the Hero Hunter is supposed to look like?? How is that not common knowledge among heroes by now?????

SCREECHING IM SCREECHING THE SECOND MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THIS EPISODE (i hope???? its running kinda late and I’m worried???????) THE NINJAS THE NINJA DUO ITS THEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM theyre so pretty i cri ????

OK MONSTER WIND LOOKS REALLY COOL I DIG I DIGGGG also I REALY dig the ominous music and as this scene is nearing its end MY HEART IS POUNDING HELP

MARSHALL GORILLA IM HYPERVENTILATING AND SCREAMING AND MY PALMS ARE SWEATING ARM SPAGHETTI HELP MY EYES ARE WATERING TOO

my hands are shaking as im typing and i cant stop laughing nervously and my through is dry this is NOT NORMAL typing is hard im afraid to push play im afraid

its been 5 minutes i cant push play i cant

I MADE A MISTAKE THEY DIDNT SHOW THE OTHER HEROES FIRST HES ON MY SCREEN I CANT STOP MY LEGS SHAKING I BREATHE

tfw ive been just mumbling oh my god oh my god nope nope nope for 10 minutes help help help nope

hes on my screen but i cant push play i cant open the tab i cant

everything is so much easier if i didnt FEEL but I have FEELINGS \

I cant even look at him i cant hes too perfect help

30 minutes i can breathe but like shaking ???? ???

ok it only took 45 minutes alright ok ok ok open the tab and PUSH the BUTTON

I lied it took an hour i still cant look at the screen im gonna die this man will be the death of me I CANT GO 2 SECONDS WITHOUT PAUSING AND SCREAMING WHY CAN I REREAD THE CHAPTER OVER AND OVER BUT CANT LISTEN TO HIM FOR 2 SECONDS WHY

OK im gonna start counting how many times I’ve paused from now on its been AT LEAST 8 so lets start there.

11 long pause his voice im crying his face

13 just look at him I cant my stomach

14 “DRAT” help me

15 i keep switching tabs but cant push play again oh no

18 I just noticed he definitely has eyebrows here asdfghjkl

NO COME BACK TORTURE ME SOME MORE WITH YOUR PERFECT GENERAL PRESENCE that was the most exhausting 1.5 hours asdfghjkl what if they dont make a season 3 what if I never see him in motion again what if i just die

OH MY GOD DRIVE KNIGHT MY MYSTERIOUS SON THANK YOU I CAN BREATHE DISTRACT ME PLZ

WAIT

DESTROCHLORIDIUM I CANT HANDLE THIS EPISODE I JUST REALLY CANT I JUST AND THE HEKKIN CAPTION HE GOT A BAD CASE OF THE RUNS AND OMFG MY FAVORITE GAROU MOMENT FROM THE MANGA THUS FAR NEXT WEEK I !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i… no recap this week. i think my feelings on the ep are obvious. Thanks for reading and somehow managing to get this far? I appreciate yall so much really. Thank you for following me being nuts as I am. I seriously mean it. I’ll see yall next week with the next with the next episode!

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queenofcats17 · 5 years

Note

I know this is gonna sound like, uber weird, but I can't find the Hell's Studio au fanfic where Sammy is turned into an ink creature after eating some chocolate cake, and I really wanted to reread it

I don’t really know where it is either, so I thought I’d just repost it here. I’m glad you like it, though.

I also posted it here

—————————————————————————

inkavixentheinkdemon asked: Yasssss!!!!! Now please do one about Sammy becoming an ink monster, please. That’s gonna be hilarious XD

So part of this is based off this comic

It had been a hard week for Sammy, mostly because of the fact that he’d been turned into an ink monster. Now he was back at work, ready to bury himself in his songwriting. Being at home had been nice, but at the same time, he’d been haunted by the memories of being that inky creature. If he could just work hard enough, he’d eventually forget about it. Everyone greeted him warmly, which made him feel a little better. He opened the door to his office and turned on the light, preparing to hang up his coat. As he put his briefcase down, he noticed something on his desk. Still, with coat in hand, he walked over. There was a piece of what looked like chocolate cake, as well as a little card. The note read as follows,

Felt bad that the ink pipes burst on you the other day…

Again…

Made this with Alice and Joey to make up for it! Don’t worry, he didn’t put anything in it I think.

-S. Campbell

A. Angel

He smiled softly at the card. He could always count on Susie to try and make things better. She was such a lovely person. He sat down at the desk, picking up the provided fork and taking a bite. It was a superb chocolate cake. But there was a strange taste to it. It tasted like…ink? Sammy groaned. Joey had slipped ink into the cake. Of course, he had.

“Joey, I swear to God.” He muttered. Oh well, he couldn’t just let the cake go to waste. It took a little for him to get past the ink flavor, but once he did he was able to finish the slice of cake. It was immediately apparent that this had been a bad idea as an intense pain gripped Sammy. He fell off his chair, clutching at his stomach. His whole body felt hot, but it wasn’t sweat coming out of his body. It was ink. Sammy’s eyes widened. No no no no no. Not again. He couldn’t go through that again. Using one hand, he started dragging himself towards the door, leaving a trail of ink behind him as it began to cover every inch of his body. He barely managed to reach the door before he passed out, his arm reaching for the doorknob.

He was found about ten minutes later when Susie and Alice came to see how he’d liked the cake.

“I just hope Joey didn’t put anything in it,” Susie said. “I wasn’t watching him the whole time and you know how he gets.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Alice assured her. Then the two of them saw the puddle of ink spreading out from under Sammy’s door. They exchanged a look then slammed the door open. Sammy was pushed back, the impact of the door jolting him back into consciousness. He had returned to his ink monster form and was bleeding ink onto the floor due to his not so stable emotional state.

“Get Joey,” Susie said. Alice was out the door almost before Susie said anything. Susie hoisted Sammy up, getting him onto the cot he kept in a corner of the office.

“I can’t believe this is happening again.” Sammy very nearly wailed.

“I’m so sorry.” Susie murmured, trying to calm him down. “I didn’t know he was going to do this. But don’t worry, we’ll fix this. We fixed it last time and we’ll fix it again.”

“I found him.” Alice entered, out of breath, dragging Joey behind her. Bendy was at the creator’s heels, followed by Wally of all people. The janitor was carrying his mop and bucket. Ah, he was there to clean up the ink pools.

“Yeesh. You look rough.” Wally said.

“Thanks, Franks, I couldn’t tell.” Sammy snapped. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief. If Sammy could snark, he was okay.

“Sammy,” Joey smiled disarmingly and put his hands up. “I promise, I didn’t intend for this to happen. I just wanted to see-”

“What would happen if you slipped ink machine ink into Susie’s gift, is that it?” Sammy asked, beginning to gain his composure once more. “I’m not your fucking guinea pig, Joey! You have to stop doing this to me!” His form began to melt again. Susie put a hand on his shoulder. At first, he flinched back, but as she murmured comforting things to him he calmed down, pulling himself together.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Joey said, fidgeting. He really did feel bad this time. Sammy really looked pissed off. Even more than usual.

“If you’re really sorry, then fix it!” Sammy snapped. Joey nodded and ran out of the room to begin preparing the solution. Susie and Wally stayed, Susie to calm Sammy and Wally to mop things up.

“He really screwed up this time, huh?” Wally said as he started mopping.

“That’s an understatement.” Susie pursed her lips, glancing back at the door. “I really am sorry, Sammy.”

“You couldn’t have known.” Sammy sighed and buried his face in his hands.

“At least you got cake, right?” Wally said. “I mean, that’s a plus.”

“Yes, I suppose. Aside from the ink taste, it was quite good.”

“Oh, I’m so glad you think so!” Susie’s face lit up. “Alice and I worked really hard on it. I’d never made a chocolate cake before and I was worried about how it would turn out.”

“You did well,” Sammy said, smiling a little. “I did appreciate the thought.”

“There we go!” Susie clapped her hands together. “It’s always nice to see you smile.”

“Freaks me out,” Wally said. “There’s somethin’ unnatural about Sammy smilin’.”

“Franks, I will throw something at you.”

“I know I know.” Wally threw his hands up and kept mopping.

Sammy was back to normal by the end of the day this time. Joey had worked throughout the day in order to fix his mistake. Bendy didn’t even mind. Joey had screwed up and so he headed to fix it. Wally complained about having to mop up Sammy’s ink trails, of course, but he did it all the same. Sammy and Susie had spent most of the day together, which gave Bendy a very interesting idea about how Joey could repay the music director…

#bendy and the ink machine #hell's studio au #fanfiction #sammy lawrence #bendy the dancing demon #wally franks #susie campbell #alice angel

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robinrunsfiction · 5 years

Text

Cubicles

Pairing: Gerard Way x Female Reader Rating: General Requested By: None Word Count: ~3,600 Author’s Note: This is some kind of AU where Fall Out Boy exists and My Chem doesn't. Song lyrics used in this story are "Baby You're A Haunted House" by Gerard Way and "Cubicles" by My Chemical Romance (but if you're reading this story, you probably already knew that)

"Gerard, can you help (YN) in the file room? There's a ton of old paperwork that needs to be pulled by the end of the month and we could you an extra person working on it," his manager Brenda asked.

"Oh yea, sure," Gerard said saving the project he was pretending to be working on and making sure that the comic he was really working on was covered by some other paper before making his way to the file room.

(YN) had already been working in the small, enclosed room for a while, her phone on a chair in the corner playing music, with her cardigan tossed over it. Gerard was a little startled to find his coworker in just a thin pink tank top and her grey pants.

"Hey (YN), Brenda sent me in to help pull files," Gerard said, hanging by the door.

"Oh good! Here," she said handing him paper. "These are all the files from the back half of the alphabet that need to be pulled and shredded. I don't know why it's like 100 degrees in here, its awful."

"Yea I noticed. What are you listening to? Fall Out Boy?"

"Yea! Sorry, I can put on something else if you prefer."

"Nah that's ok, they're cool."

Gerard and (YN) set to work pulling files, passing the time discussing music, books and movies along the way.

(YN) hadn't really gotten a chance to talk to the quiet guy in the department, their cubicles not too close to each other, but it turned our they had a lot in common. (YN) was pretty quiet as well, not really connecting with the older adults in the department who mainly talked about their kids and complained about the maintenance they needed to do on their homes over the weekend. She was glad that she finally had someone to talk to.

After a couple hours, Gerard felt himself starting to get hungry. "Hey, (YN), you wanna go get lunch?"

She glanced at her watch. "Yea, let's go someplace that isn't as hot as a desert," she replied pulling her cardigan back on and heading out of the room. "Starbucks? I kinda live off iced coffee."

"Sure," Gerard said with a smile as (YN) grabbed her purse and they headed to the elevators.

A genuine friendship was forged that day between Gerard and (YN). Over the next few weeks and months they would frequently lunch together, or sometimes go to get drinks after work if it had been a particularly rough day.

They became each other's closest confidant. (YN) told Gerard about how her sister was trying to get her to move out to California with her because she wanted to become a makeup artist in Hollywood, but she wasn't sure. (YN) was hesitant because she really didn't have any dreams of her own yet and didn't know if going out there was the best idea. Gerard told her about how he wanted to become a singer, how he had been writing songs and teaching himself guitar. How he had been drawing and working on a comic of his own but wasn't sure if anything would come from it

(YN) was fascinated by Gerard and everything he did. How he was so creative despite the soul stifling environment he worked in 40 hours a week.

Gerard appreciated (YN) for being a spot of color in the otherwise grey office environment and if he was being totally honest with himself, he did find himself having a bit of a crush on her.

Gerard was drawing instead of working on his assignment when he heard his email ding through his headphones.

From: YFN YLN Subject: Lunch ☹ Hey, I hope we can get lunch today, my treat?

From: Gerard Way Subject: RE: Lunch ☹ Yea, what's up?

He hit send and waited for a reply, but none came until (YN) appeared at his desk.

"Ready?" She asked, sounding dejected.

"Yea," he said getting up, collecting his jacket and following her out. They silently made their way to Starbucks, (YN) paying for both coffees.

"Gee, umm, my sister finally found a job out in LA. I found a job out there too, and I'm just gonna help her get on her feet." She said quietly, keeping her eyes trained on her coffee.

Gerard felt his heart break a little. He could tell she wasn't excited to be sharing this news, but he knew asking her to reconsider wouldn't make anything easier.

"I'm putting in my two weeks after this. I wanted to tell you first."

Gerard reached out and gave her hand a squeeze. "Thanks."

(YN) looked and his hand on hers and wanted to cry. She didn't want to leave Gerard. This wasn't what she wanted to do, she wished she hadn't let her sister talk her into moving.

They quietly walked back to the office and (YN) went in and talked to the manager.

On her last day, Gerard brought (YN) a coffee that morning. She smiled appreciatively, the dark circles under her eyes had gotten worse since she had told the company she was leaving. She blamed it on the packing and stress of moving across the country, but she really spent hours tossing and turning at night, thinking she had made a mistake.

"So, are you gonna be best friends with whoever they get to replace me?" She asked with a tired smile as she pulled her photos off the cubicle walls.

"Nope, " he replied, shaking his head. "Whoever it is is gonna suck."

"Gerard Way!" She scolded, looking shocked and then grinning devilishly because she knew he was right.

They went to the break room where a cake had been ordered in her honor. On the way back to their department, Gerard looked at the door to the file room where they first got to know each other, then at her desk, which had been so neatly decorated, now just another grey cubicle with all her things in a box waiting to go to California with her.

Gerard accomplished absolutely nothing that day. He had been working on a drawing he wanted to finish and give to her before she left, but before he knew it she was standing at his desk with her big box of things.

"Well that's a wrap," she said, looking like she was gonna start crying.

"I'll carry your box for you," he said getting up and slipping on his jacket. He took the large box and they walked silently to the elevators, then to her car. He slid the box into the backseat for her.

"Keep in touch," he said quietly.

"Yea, I'll let you know when I'm settled in. No place will be the same without you. You're the only one who understands my iced coffee obsession, even when its freezing," she laughed, wiping away a tear that was threatening to spill over. He laughed too, unsure what else he could do other than let his own tears flow.

After a moment of silence, he held his arms open, inviting her into a hug. She rushed into his arms, holding him close, breathing in his scent, wishing she could have gotten up the nerve to do this ages ago. His arms making her feel so secure and like every decision she had made recently was wrong.

When she pulled back, she wiped her eyes again and he sniffled as he looked up, willing his own tears back.

"We'll chat soon," (YN) said as she opened her car door. Gerard nodded and shut the door for her and watched as she drove off, giving one last wave.

When she started the car, she forgot that she had left American Beauty/American Psycho in her CD player and Fourth of July started up. She was able to wait until she had pulled out of the parking lot before breaking down sobbing.

Monday morning was especially excruciating when he remembered that (YN) wouldn't be there. He didn't want to have to make new friends. Everyone else sucked.

He dropped into his chair and started up his computer and opened his email. He was caught off guard by the first one he saw.

From: YFN YLN Subject: Sorry Hey, if I timed this right, you're getting this email Monday morning, unless you came in over the weekend for overtime, but somehow I doubt that 😉 Anyway, I'm sorry I'm gone, I hope it doesn't suck too much. To try to make it up to you there's a Starbucks gift card under your keyboard. I'll email you when I get to my first day of work. Miss you already, (YN)

Miss you already.

He reread those three words over and over. He left the email open on his computer, rereading it again and again until he took himself to Starbucks for lunch with the gift card she left him.

He didn't look at it until he pulled it out of his pocket when he was waiting in line.

To: Gee From: (YN) 🖤

A heart. He felt his own break a little more at the sight. He ordered his coffee and kicked himself mentally the whole walk back to the office for not saying something about how he felt. How could he have been so dense as to not see what was right in front of him. Maybe she would still be here if he had some guts. No, he chastised himself. That was selfish. She's an adult, she made the best decision for herself. Maybe she'll figure out what her dreams are when she gets out there. She'll find the happiness she deserves he told himself.

The week dragged by longer than Gerard ever remembered a week dragging by before. A couple times people came over to ask if he was ok, noticing that he was not himself. He appreciated it, but it was not going to be the same there without her. Not as long as her cubicle sat vacant. He finished the drawing he had meant to give to her and tucked it away in an envelope.

The following Monday afternoon Gerard was trudging through his work when he heard his email ding.

From: YFN YLN Subject: Hey!!! Hi, remember me? Your favorite former coworker turned California girl. I'm so kidding, it's kinda miserable here. The traffic is stupid, it's too hot and you're like a billion miles away. Anyway, this is my new work email, so write to me all day please! I miss hearing from you! Also why did we never just exchange phone numbers? What century am I living in?! 555-555-4243 I can't text at work because my boss sits beside me, but there are lots of hours in the day. Please don't tell me you've already replaced me! Miss you! (YN)

Also included in her email signature was her office address. Gerard pulled the envelope from his desk drawer and addressed it before running down to the mailroom.

A while later (YN) saw she had a notification on her email.

From: Gerard Way Subject: RE: Hey!!! I'm sorry who is this? I’m blocking this address as spam. I'm kidding! I missed you so much this last week! Thanks for the gift card too, I really appreciate it. No one has replaced you, but I'm pretty sure no one could, at least not to me. California sounds terrible, just come back. Or I can come visit, then it won't be so bad. Check your phone at lunch. G

(YN) grinned reading the email. Her lunch hour couldn't come soon enough. When her boss told her she could go get lunch she grabbed her phone and headed outside to get some fresh air. She saw she had a message.

From: 555-555-6495 Its G, let me know when you're on lunch.

She saved his number before replying:

To: Gee 🖤 I'm on lunch!

A couple minutes later her phone buzzed again, this time with a picture message. It was a screenshot of the Starbucks app, with a venti black iced coffee ordered. (YN) rolled her eyes, why was he bragging about getting coffee? Then she saw the pick up location. It was the Starbucks around the corner from her office. She grinned and set off.

About 10 minutes after sending the order in Gerard's phone lit up.

From: 💖(YN)💖 Thank you!!!

And then a selfie of her grinning, holding up her coffee. Gerard had to grin at the sight.

To: 💖(YN)💖 You're welcome, I missed that smile

He sent the text without realizing how flirtatious it sounded until after it went through.

From: 💖(YN)💖 ☺😘

Gerard just grinned at the response he received.

And just like that, it was almost like Gerard and (YN) weren't living on opposite sides of the country. They were emailing each other during the day and usually talked or texted in the evening.

Gerard had gotten back to writing his songs and started to think seriously about getting out to perform them. (YN) was thinking more about what she wanted to do in life. Driving across the country alone to join her sister really made her realize that she wanted to do more traveling and she began to take writing and photography courses online.

(YN) had just gotten home from a very long day when she felt her phone buzzing in her pocket.

"Hey Gee, how's it going?" She asked, setting down her bags and kicking off her shoes.

"Good, are you busy?" He asked. He sounded kind of nervous.

"No, just got home, what's up?"

"Umm, you know how I've been writing music?"

"Yea..."

"I'm gonna play something for you, ok? And be honest if it sucks."

"Will do," she replied with a grin. She heard him fidgeting with his phone while he put it on speaker.

"Can you hear me?"

"Yep, let's hear it!"

"Ok, it's not done yet, but here you go," he cleared his throat and (YN) could hear strumming.

And the nights, they last forever And days are always making you blue In the dark, we laugh together 'Cause the misery's funny to you Oh, baby, you're a haunted house Better find another superstition We're gonna stay in love somehow 'Cause, baby, you're a haunted house now I'll be the only one who likes the things you do I'll be the ghost inside your head when we are through Sometimes you scare me, but I come around to you I'll say hello, hello, hello And I'll find a way to scare you too

(YN) was grinning ear to ear after hearing the song. "Gee! That was so cool!" She said when he was done.

"Really?"

"Yes! That was so cool, you're really talented! You're the one that should be out here in California becoming a huge rock star! Seriously come out here!”

Gerard chuckled at her enthusiasm. "Maybe I will.”

The next day at work, (YN) found herself in the middle of another really long day. She had finished being trained and her boss had increased her workload. She was feeling totally swamped, and almost in tears when one of the administrative assistants dropped an envelope on her desk.

She was confused when she saw the return address was her old office. She tore into the envelope and pulled out the neatly folded piece of paper.

She unfolded it gently and found a drawing of herself and Gerard sitting at their Starbucks, smiling, coffees on the table, holding hands.

I wanted to finish this before you left, but it wasn’t ready. I hope you like it. G

(YN) could feel the tears start to well up again. She opened up a new email window.

To: Gerard Way Subject: You Jerk Thanks for making me cry at work you jerk! I got your drawing and its incredible! Seriously, how are you so talented at everything? Come visit already! I miss you!

A few minutes later she saw the notification flash that she had a new email.

From: Gerard Way Subject: FWD: Time Off Request Gerard, Your request off for next Thursday through Monday has been approved. Enjoy your time off. Brenda

(YN) gasped and tried to contain her excitement best she could, but her boss glanced over.

“Everything ok?”

“More than ok, actually. If I come in early next Thursday, can I leave early to pick up a friend from the airport?”

“Sure, that’s fine,” her boss replied before turning her attention back to her work. (YN) tried to focus on her work the rest of the day, but she was just too excited.

The following Thursday evening, (YN) was waiting at the airport, getting more excited and nervous by the minute.

When she spotted Gerard in the crowd, he had hardly changed at all. His black hair a little longer, but still looked neatly styled. He looked so cool in a band shirt and jeans, instead of khakis and polo shirts like (YN) saw him everyday at work. When he spotted her his whole face lit up in a grin as he hurried up to her.

“Gee! I missed you so much!” she said throwing her arms around his neck before he could even set down his bag and guitar.

“I missed you too!” He replied, his voice muffled as he pressed his face against her neck.

“Come on, let’s go back to my house, I have something to show you.”

“Cool because I got a lot to tell you too.” When they arrived at her house, (YN) took him to the guest room so he could get settled.

“So can you now please tell me what your gonna do tomorrow?” Whined (YN) sitting down on the bed.

“Ok, so I’m going to a meeting with a manager, and I’m going to record some songs,” Gerard replied with a grin.

“Seriously? That’s so cool! I’m so proud of you Gee!”

“Thanks. I wanted to play you a song too. In person,” he said, opening the guitar case. A look of nervousness on his face before he began.

It's the tearing sound of love-notes Drowning out these gray stained windows And the view outside is sterile And I'm only two cubes down I'd photocopy all the things that we could be If you took the time to notice me But you can't now, I don't blame you And it's not your fault that no one ever does But you don't work here anymore It's just a vacant three by four And they might fill your place A temporary stand-in for your face This happens all the time And I can't help but think I'll die alone So I'll spend my time with strangers A condition and it's terminal In this water-cooler romance And it's coming to a close We could be in the park and dancing by a tree Kicking over blades we see Or a dark beach with a black view And pin-pricks in the velvet catch our fall I know you don't work here anymore Sometimes I think I'll die alone, sometimes I think I'll die alone

He looked up at (YN) when he finished singing. He couldn’t read what she was feeling.

“Gee, it was so beautiful and sad and…”

“I wrote it for you.”

“Yea, I could tell,” she paused. “Gerard, I should have told you how I felt before I left. I liked you so much back then, it broke my heart when I left.”

Gerard nodded silently. When he heard her say “liked" he realized that he had misread how she felt now.

“But Gee, I wanted you to come out here so I could tell you in person, I love you.”

Gerard looked up, his breath caught in his chest. “Really?”

(YN) nodded.

“(YN), I love you too,” he replied before setting his guitar down and leaning over and cupping her cheek. She leaned into the touch as he brought his lips to hers gently at first, tentatively, then no longer holding back the feelings he had been holding on to for so long. When they separated, she laughed and wiped away a tear.

“Are you ok?” Gerard asked.

“Yea, I’m just really happy, for the first time in a long time.”

Gerard wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

“Wait, weren't you gonna show me something too?”

“Oh yea!” (YN) got up and went to her room and grabbed her laptop. “This is the project I’m working on,” she explained. Gerard started reading the introductory post on the screen.

Hi! My name is (YN) and I recently moved across the country to live with my sister, a makeup artist whose work can be seen here. Driving across the country alone taught me a lot about myself. I realized that I was leaving the only man I think I’ve ever loved, and I was helping my sister chase her dream while mine didn’t exist. That’s what this blog is for. For now I’m just going to be planning the places I want to see and practicing taking photos so when I have a bit more money and a lot more vacation days saved, I’ll have a lot of great stuff for you! Thanks for reading!

Gerard looked up with a grin on his face. “You figured it out!”

“Yea! I am really excited. I hope you don’t mind I mentioned you.”

“Not at all, it’s part of your story. Umm, our story?”

“Our story,” she nodded.

Gerard slid the box into the backseat of her car and shut the door behind it.

“You ready?” she asked as she walked up.

“Yea, the guys are in the van ready to go,” Gerard replied.

“Then let’s get on our way to Milwaukee! Text me when you’re gonna stop for lunch. It’s kinda embarrassing when the merch and the photographer show up to the venue before the band,” (YN) said with a laugh.

“You're never gonna let me live that down are you?” Gerard asked rubbing the back of his neck.

“Never,” (YN) replied with a smirk before placing a quick kiss on her boyfriend's lips.

“But you love me.”

“Always have, always will.”

Masterlist

#gerard way x reader #gerard way #gerard way fanfic #gerard way imagines #its so fluffy #this story made me happy to write #gerard way fan fic #gerard way fan fiction #gerard way imagine #my chemical romance fan fic #my chemical romance fan fiction

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