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#I had to write this four separate times so as not to end up with angst
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AITA for telling off my sister about watching a kid's show?
💫 for searching!
I (15F) have an older sister, Penn (17F), who is kinda childish. Actually, she's really smart, and can be mature when she needs to be. It's just that her interests are kinda childish for someone her age.
Penn really likes cartoons and video games, and recently she's been getting into Sonic the Hedgehog. At first I thought she was just getting into the Snapcube fandubs, but out of nowhere I saw her watching one of the new Sonic TV shows, can't remember if it was Sonic Boom or Sonic Prime.
Anyways, at first, this didn't really bother me too much. She watched her show for the weekend, and I would get back to my shows for the next few weeks. But then the next weekend, she was still watching the show. When I asked Penn why, she said that she was really invested, and she hadn't actually finished the show yet. She said she was watching it in increments, because she wanted to savor the episodes, which felt stupid. The writing was obviously meant for kids, and the colors felt really bright and glaring to my eyes. I couldn't believe this was how she was unwinding, or how she could "savor" such a bad show. Plus, I prefer to watch as many episodes as possible in one go rather than in separate goes, but to each their own ig.
Next weekend comes, and guess what? Penn picks up the remote before I can get it, and says she's gonna keep watching some more. At this point, I'm pretty mad. I've been wanting to watch my shows all in one go during the weekends, but have been stuck watching one or two episodes at a time after school each day. So I snapped at her, saying, "Nooo, let's watch my things!"
Penn looked kinda hurt, and when she asked me why I said that in such an annoyed tone, I told her that the show she was watching was cringe and just plain bad. I also said that we never watched my shows anymore, only hers, and that she shouldn't be focusing on kids' media when she has college to focus on soon.
Penn got really mad at me for saying that, telling me that she just wanted to unwind now that the third quarter had ended for her school (our school years are divided into four quarters rather than 2 semesters), and that her homework load was lighter. She also said that she hardly ever uses the TV, and that I wouldn't die if she used it just once. She then left the living room in a huff and went up to her room. This was a day ago, and she hasn't spoken to me since then.
I feel like I was really a justified asshole in this. She's been hogging the TV with the Sonic show, instead of focusing on any of her advanced classes. I guess you guys can decide? It just feels like we're both getting older, and that she needs to stop focusing on such childish things. I think that if I help her get into media that's more aimed for older audiences, it'll help her get into more of a mature mindset.
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jheqiawrites · 1 year
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All is Calm, the Future's Bright
This is my @mlsecretsanta gift for @juliettelime! You wanted some sweet holiday fluff, so I hope this delivers the feels. Merry Christmas!
Adrien leaned against the door frame, staring at the blue-black messy bun that was bent obsessively over the desk.  He smiled.  He had known from day one of his lady’s brilliant, creative mind and her ability to bring the most convoluted plans to fruition, but the same intensity that had led them safely through hundreds of battles also led her to get easily overwhelmed by deadlines and panic over setbacks.  
“Of course, knowing that Ladybug is Marinette means I know how to take care of her when she gets like this,”  he thought warmly.  It was just what made her the woman he loved, the woman he needed in his life as much as the air he breathed.
Padding softly across the crimson rug of her studio, he eased up behind her.  Moving slowly so as not to trigger her selfdefense skills - it took getting thrown off a building only once to get that through his thick skull - he placed the mug of hot chocolate on the desk where she could see it but there was no way she could knock it over.
Then, bending over, he kissed the back of her neck gently, the loose curls hanging there delightfully tickling his nose.
“Hmmm,” was her only response, a questioning lilt in her hum as her stylus skated over the tablet.
“It’s getting late, love,” he murmured, breathing in deeply of the scents of flowers and citrus in her hair and the deeper, more personal scent of her that drove him to distraction even when he wasn’t transformed.  “You’ve been at it all day.”
Marinette sighed.  “I was just trying to get this finished.  You know the spring line needs to be in production by mid-January and-“
“Yes, I know,” he interrupted, wrapping his arms around her.  “But I know you also need to rest well to work hard, Princess, and you have been skimping on sleep again.”
He felt her cheek grow warm against his.  “How did you know?”
He let her go and spun her chair around so he could see her face.  “What, you don’t think this old cat doesn’t notice when half the bed gets cold?  Besides you have been depriving me of the joy of having my wife wake up in my arms in the morning.”
Her blush deepened, but her eyes sparkled.  “I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to you saying things like that without the mask.”
Holding himself over her on the arms of her chair, he leaned in with a smirk.  “Oh, trust me!  I’m worse when you’re not around.  Nino says I’m an unbearable sap and most of the other guys either make gagging noises or pretend to call their dentist.”
A smirk of her own spread across her lips as she tapped him on the nose.  “It’s your own fault for being such a sweet talker, Kitty.”
His heart skipped a beat.  Even after eight years together in one way or another, he would never get over her punning back at him.  “Oh, and when she smirks like that I am liable to kiss her senseless!”
“Speaking of sweet, you should drink your hot chocolate before it cools,” he said with a sigh.  “And if you don’t come down by the time I’m finished with mine, I will come fetch you myself.”  
Her smirk widened into a mischievous grin.  “You know that does’t give me much motivation to do that, don’t you?”
He growled and spun her chair around playfully.  “I am giving you five more minutes, little bug, then I’m canceling our reservations.”
He saw her eyes widen in surprise before he sprinted for the door, barely hearing her panicked cry of “Reservations?!  What-“ over his laughter.
Adrien chuckled all the way down the stairs of their townhouse, enjoying the mischief he had caused his Lady.  Marinette could take it, of course, and give as good as she got, but she had been working too hard for the last six months and she had to relax and get the rest she needed in order to be her best.  It was no mean feat, as she was trying to get her fashion boutique up and running, but he made sure she got it, by hook or by crook.
He made himself a cup of hot chocolate and settled on the couch, thumbing through his phone’s contacts with a subtle smirk.  Just keeping up with his lady was a full time job.
In less than five minutes, Marinette rushed down the stairs, empty mug in hand and a chocolate mustache on her upper lip.  “There.  All done,” she panted, looking at him with worried eyes.  “What was this about reservations?  Adrien, I’m sorry!  I must have forgotten -“
Standing up, he moved to her side.  It had been a shock several years ago to learn exactly how drawn to Marinette he had always been, even before he had learned she was Ladybug.  She had always been his lodestone, whether with the mask or without.
“Shhh.  The only thing you have forgotten is to take care of yourself, love,” he soothed.  Reaching out, he wiped the chocolate from her lip and then licked it off his finger.  “You take care of everything and everyone except yourself, Marinette.”
She sighed.  “Comes from being a hero too long, I guess.  I’m just used to it.  Kind of hard to break that sort of habit.”
“And that is why you have me.  To take care of you so you can take care of everything else.”
She smiled at him crookedly.  “I don’t deserve it, you know.”
He scoffed at that.  “My lady, I would find a way to bring you all the stars of the Milky Way on a diamond chain if it would make you smile.  What’s a little thing like making sure you sleep and eat regularly?”
At that moment her stomach rumbled loud enough to be mistaken for an angry monster.  They exchanged looks and burst out laughing!
“Speaking of which,” she said, laughter still on her lips, “I believe someone said something about reservations?”
The doorbell rang throughout the town house.
Marinette sighed.  “If it is Stella with more fabric samples tell her I'm not home!”  Her voice was petulant but her lips still quirked in a smile.
Adrien kissed her on the forehead and went to answer the door.  He saw her face turn confused when he returned with two delivery bags full of take out boxes.
“But I thought-“
“Our reservations, my love, are for the most exclusive location in town.  Invitation only.”  He set the bags down on the coffee table and started unpacking them.  The heady scents of garlic and marjoram filled the air and he saw Marinette’s eyes light up when she saw the restaurant name on the bags.
“You ordered from Prima Vera?  You remembered!”
“That you love their lasagna?  Yes, but the location goes hand in hand with the meal.  So you go get dressed in something cozy while I finish laying it out.”
“Cozy?”  She wrapped her arms around his waist from behind, rubbing her face against his shoulder blade.  “Shouldn’t I dress for the occasion, Kitty?  A date at an invitation only spot sounds very exclusive - black tie at the very least.”
“It generally is,” he replied with a smirk, pulling one of her hands up to press a kiss to her palm.  “But tonight it is lady’s choice.  Besides, I …ahem… happen to know the owner.”
“Really.”  
“Oh yes.”  Adrien left the boxes on the table and turned around so he could hold her.  “He happens to be dead gone on you and would do anything to make his dream princess happy.”
“He sounds sweet,” she replied coyly, looking up at him through her lashes.  She rose up on her toes to press a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth.  “But I hope you told him I have a very jealous husband and cat at home.”
“He knows, my love.  I go off to duel with him at dawn over you.  If I don’t come back, Cat Noir can have you with my blessing.”
Marinette fell into a fit of giggles, laughing so hard she ran out of breath and was left gasping in his arms, clinging to him to remain upright.
“You’re ridiculous!”  He grinned widely at her happy smile as she wiped laugh tears from her cheeks.  “Adrien, you always know how to make me laugh!”
“Good!  Step one of Operation: Holidate has made a successful start!”  He turned her and gave her a gentle push towards the stairs.  “Now, you go get dressed in something comfortable while I slip a twenty to the manager for a prime table in front of the fire.”
She chuckled on her way up the stairs to their room.
“Thank you for planning all this, Adrien,” Tikki said, flying out of the kitchen with two cloth napkins.  “Our girl works too hard.  She’s always put so much pressure on herself to get things done.  Whether that meant fighting akumas, homework, competitions, or presents for friends, she has trouble knowing when to ask for help.”
“But that’s why she has us.”  He went and grabbed two of their good china plates and some silverware, laying everything out nicely on the coffee table.  He lit a fire in the fireplace and candles all around the room, giving it a romantic, golden glow.  He even laid out little plates in the kitchen for their kwamis with some fried mozzarella for Plagg and a slice of chocolate torte for Tikki.  
The little red kwami flew up to his cheek for a fond nuzzle.  “You’re so thoughtful.  Thank you.”
He smiled and stroked the top of her head the way he often would for Plagg.  “You’re welcome,  Tikki.  You are so considerate that it is a pleasure to do nice things for you.”
There was a derogatory snort from Plagg and Tikki rolled her eyes.  “He should say thank you too, but he is too busy stuffing his face, as usual!”
There was a loud gulp followed by an even louder burp.  “Lay off, Tiks!  If you keep being this sweet, you’ll spoil him after I finally got him trained up right!”
Adrien chuckled.  “Just be thankful I’m not telling her about your teaching methods, you old stinker!”
“You can’t scare me until you’ve been around the block a few thousand times, Kitten!”
“Well, in that case, I’m sure Tikki would love to hear about the time when you encouraged me to sneak into Marinette’s room while she was out and-“
Suddenly his face was full of nervous, black kwami trying desperately to cover his mouth.  Adrien burst out laughing as Tikki shot Plagg a look that could blister paint and tackled him out of the air.
“What was that all about?”
He turned to see Marinette smirking at him with a raised eyebrow.  Adrien’s breath caught in his throat at the sight.  Her raven hair spilled around her shoulders in silky waves, held away from her face by a pink cloth headband.  She wore one of his dress shirts, the sleeves rolled up enough for her hands to show, and a worn pair of grey leggings.  She was beautiful, alluring in a way that only she could be for him and she did it without really trying.
A few years ago, Adrien would have been stunned stupid by the sight, but younger Adrien had been too afraid to speak his heart honestly.  He knew better now, he knew her better now, and he wasn’t afraid to say what was in his heart to the woman who held it gently in her own hands.
He stepped up to her, his hands running up and down her arms slowly, soothingly, despite the rapid tempo of his heartbeat.  “Have I ever told you what seeing you in my clothes does to me?”
Marinette looked up at him coyly and pretended to straighten his collar.  “Hmmm, at least once.  I believe there might have been something about kissing me senseless, but I was a little distracted at the time.”
“Didn’t Maman teach you never to eat dessert first,” he chided with a smirk of his own.  “You’ll spoil our lovely dinner.”
“You’ll spoil me, more likely,” she whispered and rose on her toes to kiss him softly.  “But you are right.  I’m starving and everything smells amazing!”
So they sat on the sofa, eating delicious food and listening to some soft jazz as they watched the firelight dance in each other’s eyes.  It was a beautiful moment, like the world had paused just for them to enjoy and Adrien burned it into his heart to remember forever.  There had been so many years of loneliness, heartache, fear, hurt, confusion, and, finally, acceptance before they had found each other.  
Marinette was his storm anchor, holding him fast when the world threatened to spiral out of control.  She had been there for him through it all, giving of herself and her golden heart long before he understood what love really was.  She fought his demons when he was no longer able to fight for himself.  She was his laughter, his peace, his home.  
And now, with her lying curled against his chest within the circle of his arms, he felt overwhelmed by the gift she always gave him.
“I love you, Princess,” he murmured softly, kissing her forehead with all the tenderness of his overflowing heart.  “I don’t know how I could have made it this far without you.  You are so precious to me, Marinette, and you need to take more time for you.  For us.  I need time with you.  You are what makes me feel whole and alive.  I… I’ve missed you, little bug.”
She looked up at him with eyes full of love and tears welling up in the corners.  “I’ve missed you too, Kitty.  I just know how much you disliked modeling for … that man and I don’t want to bring back unpleasant memories for you.  You’ve been so good about supporting me, but-“
He placed a gentle finger against her lips.  “None of that!  I love you, Marinette!  I have always supported your dreams of being a fashion designer!  Always!  And believe me, there is a world of difference between helping you with your boutique and working for Gabriel.  You are thoughtful and considerate of my needs, you listen respectfully when I offer suggestions, and you want to work with me.  More than anything, you love me and it shows in everything you do, my lady.  I look forward to building new memories at your side for the rest of our lives, but I need you to step out of your bubble in order to do that.  Okay?”
She blushed and sighed.  “You’re right.  I’ve just been trying to do it on my own and try to keep you from getting hurt.  You know that is the last thing I would ever want, right?”
He nodded and stroked a tendril of hair behind her ear.  “I know, but there are no more akumas… no more chances for broken moons, no mater what our nightmares may tell us.  So let me in more and come out more yourself.  You’re doing yourself no good staying locked away in your studio all day.”
She smiled up at him.  “Have I told you how much I like it when you stand firm like that?”
“Not recently,” he drawled, cuddling her closer to him.
“Well, I do.  Like it, I mean.  It makes me feel safe… protected… loved.”  She yawned hugely, stretching like a kitten on his lap.
“It really is getting late now, my love.”  He chuckled ruefully.  “I got down the boxes of garlands and things earlier.  I thought we could do some decorating, but you need sleep more than holiday spirit.”
She giggled sleepily, blinking her cornflower eyes slowly at him in a way that warmed him all over.  “Just so you know, I don’t deserve you.”
“So what do you deserve for saving the world a thousand times before getting out of university?”
Marinette leaned up and kissed him lightly on the end of his nose.  “A happy ending?”  She sighed and snuggled back against him.  He breathed in her sweet scent and sighed contentedly.  It was the scent of home.
He knew she would be asleep soon, but he didn’t want the moment to end just yet.  He wrapped his arms around her more firmly and settled deeper into the sofa, watching the firelight sparkle off the satin of her hair.
“Sounds good,” he whispered.  “As long as it’s with you.”
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pepprs · 1 year
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ok actually yeah. i really need to do dishes and go to bed and not stay up late mentalillnessposting a little too viscerally on tumblr the night before i facilitate a workshop in front of the literal president of the university and the vp of my division (LOL about that btw. actively shitting my pants.) but oh my GOD. so saying goodbye to lia was actually fine in the moment. neither of us cried and we talked about all the ways we’ll still be in each others lives and reasons we’ll have to interact in the near future. and she gave me an extremely heartfelt thoughtful gift and we left on a very hopeful note and i felt better and content bc there’s still the rest-of-life and we’ll see each other there. but like an hour before that as i mentioned i was HYSTERICALLY sobbing. in full view of people i know AND people i don’t. and i just sat there and sobbed while everything carried on around me. everything carried on around me!!! and i feel like im about to sob again thinking about it.
#purrs#delete later#idk. i typed a bunch here and then deleted it and now idk what to say. i just feel so lonely. i have had fucked up relationships with every#single older adult in my life and never had someone who could a) stay in my life b) be consistently present in my life c) meet my emotional#needs d) actually See me and accept me for who i am. Like not one person who can be all four of those things. and i have to be all four of t#those things for myself now because im 24 and i missed my chance. but how fucking shitty and painful is that? especially after a year like t#this. the way it’s literally ending the SAME way last year did. huge scary promotion (which i haven’t even talked about on here or to anyone#but lia today actually. but it might be huger and scarier than i thought. which is good but also HUGE -‘d scary. and not a bad thing of bc o#course but it’s so fucking… perilous? like it makes me feel profoundly imperiled because i have extremely good reason to feel that way. and#i have to endure the mortifying ordeal of applying for my own job AGAIN after the first time was so horrible. lol) and also losing a beloved#mentor figure who understood me in a way no one else did which mattered immensely even if they couldn’t do the whole presence thing or#whatever. and now i only have one older adult in my life left (aside from my therapist who doesn’t really count bc i only see her once a#week and we barely know each other still) who is like. here and helping me and i KNOW i am so sick in the head i KNOW and i should not be#writing it but every single day i am fucking terrified that i am being or will be separated from him emotionally or physically jsut like all#the others so. LOL!!!!! i am normal and well adjusted. but it’s like so fucking painful because im grasping at straws but again the reality#is im 24 and the only people on this earth who it is fair for me to expect all 4 from and who should’ve provided it to me are my parents.#and i missed my chance with them forever and now i have to do it myself. and that’s ok sometimes and i can handle it… except in the moments#where im sobbing hysterically and everything carries on. when i am in my darkest moments i want to run to an older adult and have them#comfort me but i truly cannot do that with any of the ones i still have left / regularly interact with for so many reasons. and it’s so#painful it makes me sick sometimes. and now i have to be the romy and the lia i wish to see in this world. but how can i do that when i#haven’t finished grieving over them leaving which feels like leaving ME — NOW — in this moment when i have never needed more support of that#kind more. how can isummon it within myself. im not ready yet. i need a long hug and a hand to hold that won’t (have to) let go. when im#crying i need someone to take me somewhere and comfort me and calm me down. and im 24 so i can’t ask for it. but oh my god i need it. and i#missed my chance. and lia left today and she only ever did that for me metaphorically but… tonight i feel more alone than ever.#and it’s like i don’t even have the emotional intelligence or whatever to ASK for that. bc im playing by ear and i don’t know how to read#the music of it. im self taught. that fucking sucks. that SUCKSSS. also that’s too strong a way to put it liek obviously my friends who are#closer to my age are INTEGRAL to me being able to function and i learn from them and cherish their support. but just like i can’t be a mom#to me my friends can’t either. so it’s like what the fuck do i do. get steamrolled by relentless grief and rage every day i guess.#also side note. everything carried on when i was in brighton too. i came home early ofc but it’s like nothing changed in my absence. and#that has fucked me up SUPREMELY. i think that might be a root of it. like hm… it seems my presence doesn’t have impacts. but idk
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nereidprinc3ss · 26 days
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do you believe me now? | 3
in which spencer reid spends a rainy day teaching inexperienced fem!reader how to touch him. of course, her efforts don't go unrecognized, much less unrewarded
part one | part two | part four
18+ (smut) warnings: inexperienced reader, softdom!spencer, sub reader, oral m receiving, reader swallows lol, a truly sickening amount of praise, like really, you JOKINGLY refer to each other as dirty sluts, r has longish hair, spit mentioned once, thigh riding (moans loudly), its filthy idk what to tell you, i feel like i've crossed the desert on foot i don't even know what else is in here, your honor they're in love, i take you to dinner first, this part is stupidly long a/n: had a fucking field day the three separate times i had to rewrite this el oh el... but think i like how it turned out?! anyway, if u like this PLS lmk bc writing it took a small piece of my soul, and yes there will be a part four!! take care of yourselves!! i love you!!!
You give Spencer half a minute or so before knocking on his door for a second time. 
It’s miserable outside, and though the hallway you’re standing in now isn’t terribly cold, you’d much prefer to be in Spencer’s apartment, where it will be the same toasty 68.5 degrees as always. Not that the heating will magically dry you. And not that you’ll be there for long, if the date you’d scheduled last week goes on as planned. 
You’re getting worried, about to knock for a third time when the locks finally click and the door opens to reveal a disheveled Spencer Reid—not at all looking ready for a date. You take in his ensemble; blue checked pajama pants, FBI Academy crewneck, the usual questionably paired socks. He’s rubbing his droopy eyes, which slowly widen as he notices your attire. 
“Shit, I’m sorry, our date! I mean—you look really nice. I look… like this. Why don’t you come in while I get ready to go?”
He holds the door open a little wider and you step through, relishing in the familiar warmth as you pull your hood down and excess water droplets spatter on the ground. 
“When did you get in?” you ask, hanging your raincoat up on a hook. You know he’d wrapped up a case yesterday evening, but you’d gone to sleep before the team left Cincinnati. 
Spencer pauses in the middle of the room, staring at the antique flooring like he forgot what he was doing. 
“Uh… four hours ago.”
“Wh—four hours? Spencer, you must be exhausted.”
He laughs awkwardly, running a tired hand over his face. 
“I mean… I’ve definitely felt better.”
You kick your soaked shoes off and cross the room until you’re toe to toe with him. Immediately his hands settle on your waist and yours find his arms. His eyes are kind, and he’s clearly pleased by your presence despite his lack of energy. 
“The weather’s terrible, anyway. Let’s just go out another day.”
His features have softened and you can see how tired he truly is—not just in his bleary eyes, but the way his fingers grasp weakly to you, the way his head bows slightly. It seems bone-deep. 
“But I haven’t seen you in a week. I don’t want you to go home.”
Your lips twist. A clap of thunder rolls in the distance and the rain starts coming down even harder against the windowpanes. 
“We could hang out here. We can take a nap!”
Spencer sighs—half resignation, half disappointment. 
“But we made such good plans,” he laments. 
You kiss his cheek. 
“Plans that can be rescheduled. The bookstore will still be there next weekend.”
It takes him a moment to settle into the idea, but you watch the exhaustion win. 
“Okay. But no nap. I want to be awake for you. Coffee?”
You nod enthusiastically, beaming at the prospect of getting to spend the day doing nothing with him. Spencer mirrors your grin, before pressing a kiss to your head.
“You’re so cute.” Heat creeps into your cheeks and you can’t think of a satisfactory reply, but in the end you don’t need to, as he tugs gently on your hands. “C’mon. Tell me what mug you want.”
The kitchen counter bites into your palms as you lean with your back to it, watching Spencer putter all around the kitchen as he works on the coffee. It makes you tired just to watch. 
“Are you sure you don’t want to take a nap? Caffeine isn’t a substitute for sleep, you know.”
“I do know,” he agrees, measuring coffee grounds. “But other than last night, I actually slept fairly well this week.”
“You seem exhausted.”
“I… am tired in lots of ways. Not all of which can be resolved with more sleep.” he admits.
Your heart drops ever so slightly at the way his voice weakens as he looks through the fridge. Sometimes you remember there are still things you don’t know about him—sides you haven’t met. His work side is one of them, and it more than a little intimidates you.
“Bad case?” you ask, voice quiet and crackling with nervous energy. 
Spencer nods, approaching and setting a carton of milk on the counter behind you—caging you in with his arms in the process. It’s hard to find the words when he’s this close, but you manage to stumble through them. 
“Do… do you wanna talk about it?”
Spencer hums, tilting his head before gently saying, “not right now. But thank you for offering, lovely.”
“Okay, well—if you change your mind… if there’s anything I can do to make you feel better…”
Finally he stops with the teasing—the unabashed staring at your lips, the faux-attentive nods—and drops his head to your level to kiss you properly. It’s obviously an attempt to get you to shut up, you’re not dumb enough so as to miss that—but you don’t really care why he’s doing it so long as he does it at all. 
“I feel pretty great right now, actually,” he murmurs against your lips, a hint of a smile coloring his words. “Do you want sugar in yours?”
“Um…”
Your eyes dart helplessly between his as he pulls away and you struggle to un-fluster yourself enough to answer his simple question. Spencer seems to delight in this. The longer it takes you, the bigger his perfect smile gets. 
“You took too long. You’re getting sugar.”
“Are you sure there’s nothing I can do?” you plead later on the couch, for the third or fourth time, setting your mostly-empty mug on the coffee table. 
His eyebrows raise. 
“I’m sure, honey.”
“But I want to help,” you pout, pulling your knees into your chest. Spencer regards you for a moment from the other end of the couch, before beckoning you closer wordlessly. 
“You are helping,” he assures you, gently grabbing your wrist as you crawl into his lap. He rubs soothing circles into the delicate skin with his thumb. “You being here and being you is plenty.”
It’s the closest you’ve been to him since before he left, and while you’ve all but given up on asking him to sleep with you, it doesn’t mean you don’t think about it multiple times per day. It’s especially difficult to keep your thoughts PG when you haven’t seen him in a week, and his hair is all messy, and he’s got his pajamas on, and you’re in his lap, and he’s looking at you like that. 
“What are you thinking about?” Spencer murmurs, likely concerned by your lack of response and the glazed-over look in your eyes. You reanimate, averting your gaze to the spot on your thigh he’s now rubbing absentmindedly. 
“Nothing. I just missed you.”
“I missed you a lot, too.” You don’t even have to look up to know that his brows have twisted into a pleasant sort of bemusement, like you are a particularly complex puzzle—you can hear it as he continues speaking. “I’m still not used to having something external take up so much of my attention while I’m trying to do my job. I’ve never had that before. Not something good, anyway. It’s like every time I leave, I’m thinking about you more than the time before. And I was already thinking about you a lot.”
The corner of your mouth twitches as he rambles. 
“Really?”
“Yeah, really,” he chuckles. “You prove to be incredibly distracting even when you’re hundreds of miles away. Do you know how many nights I almost called you before realizing it was one in the morning?”
A slow smile spreads over your face. 
“Oh? Whatever could you have been calling about at one in the morning?”
You’re teasing him, and it works. He blushes adorably. 
“Um… probably exactly what you’d expect. In hindsight I think it’s best that I refrained.”
“What?” You grin, incredulous, forgetting your shyness and leaning closer. “You totally should’ve. I’ve never had phone sex before. I would’ve done it.”
“No, you wouldn’t!” Spencer laughs. “It would have just been me talking to myself with you on the other line. I don’t think phone sex is really up your alley.”
“Shut up,” you laugh as your lips meet. He smiles into the kiss. Before you get too lost in it, you pull away, leaning back when he tries to follow you. “I think you’re over-complicating it. It’s just dirty talk, right? I can totally do that. It’s just, like… blah blah blah, dirty slut, something something…”
You trail off as he gives you a look. Poker faced—aside from the slightly narrowed eyes sparkling with humor. 
“You want me to refer to you as a dirty slut?”
Maintaining eye contact is an uphill battle—you crack in a matter of seconds, resting your forehead against his and closing your eyes stubbornly. 
“No. For all you know I want to call you a dirty slut.”
It’s a ridiculous, but he recognizes the bravado for what it is, still smiling slightly as he rubs your hips. 
“Right. I apologize for assuming. But just for future reference, I don’t want to be called that, and I don’t think I’d be comfortable calling you that, either.”
“But you can call me other stuff,” you remind your boyfriend, pulling back and still not looking at him. 
“Yeah? Like what?”
And just like that, you’re shy again. 
“I don’t know… nice things. I like when you’re nice.”
“I like being nice to you.” It’s so sincere-sounding that you meet his gaze, examining his face. His eyes are clear and soft on you, the only source of warm light on such a grey day, as his hands keep running slow lines over your sides. “Kiss?”
And how could you ever deny him anything? 
As has happened before, the kiss starts out innocent enough. And it’s not that it gets particularly heated, or anything—it’s just that it doesn’t end, and after a few moments your mouth slips open and so does his and that’swhat gets both of you worked up over a period of minutes. Pressure and heat that you’re becoming accustomed to build between your legs, and you don’t even notice that you’ve begun rocking back and forth in his lap until Spencer is attempting to still your hips with patient but assertive hands. 
“Honey, that’s—slow down, sweetheart.”
Finally he gets a grip on you and you realize as soon as you stop moving that there had been friction occurring—and you’re pretty damn sure you know what you were grinding against. 
Your whole body feels hot with arousal and embarrassment. 
“Oh my god—I’m sorry,” you mumble, moving your hands from his shoulders to cover your face. “That was an accident, I—”
“It’s fine,” Spencer assures you, squeezing your waist gently. “I just wanted to make sure you knew what you were doing because I know we haven’t… gotten there, yet.”
A moment passes—your hands fall to the FBI stitching across his chest, studying the letters without really seeing them. You haven’t gotten there yet… but why not? Why haven’t you touched him, or even seen him? You think back to the few times he’s touched you and realize that you had been too busy with either your own insecurities or pleasure to genuinely consider how it might be affecting him. He says your name gently, drawing your attention. 
“You okay?”
You nod haltingly, brow furrowed as you think. 
“I—yeah. I was just realizing that I haven’t, like… touched you, yet.”
It’s silent for another long second, and you glance up, to where he’s studying you with a dissonant kind of relaxed scrutiny—a knowing confidence that probably comes with a lot more experience than you have. 
“Do you want to?”
Woah. 
Usually you have to beg on hands and knees and prepare a slideshow presentation before he agrees to doing anything sexual in nature. He’s never so overtly invited or initiated it before. Not that you’re complaining by any stretch of the imagination.  
You nod shyly, still fiddling with the fabric of his shirt. 
“If you want to, I can show you how. But it’s also absolutely okay if you don’t.”
Show you how? 
Your brain is melting into sludge at the idea. 
“I do,” you admit, meeting his gaze again. It’s kind, and you know he really wouldn’t be upset if you said no—but now that you’ve thought about it, you feel deeply compelled to try. 
“Okay. Come here, first.” You lean forward expectantly, eyes fluttering shut as his hand finds the back of your neck and he pulls you into another soft kiss. By the time your lips separate again, your head is spinning. “We’re just trying something, okay? You’re allowed to stop whenever you feel like it. Really low stakes. Got it?”
You nod, still close enough that your noses brush as you do. 
“Got it.”
He presses one more chaste kiss to your lips before pulling away and leaning back into the couch. 
“Scoot back a little, angel.”
Wordlessly you do so, heart pounding with nervous excitement as he lifts his hips and slides his pajama pants down just enough to where he can comfortably pull himself out, and—
Your breath catches. 
Now, you may be about as virginal as they come, but you weren’t born yesterday. You’ve seen porn, you’ve received unsolicited nudes—it is the 21st century. Yet never before have you thought to yourself; wow, that dick is the pinnacle of beauty. Perfect. Breathtaking. But there’s just no other way to describe him. 
So that’s what hits you first—how unexpectedly pretty it is. 
The size sinks in a quick second later. 
You can’t tell with perfect accuracy how many inches he is, but you’re pretty damn sure he’s big. That’s meant to fit inside of you?
No, no—that’s a consideration for another day. Right now you need to stop staring like an idiot. You glance up at his face, and he’s sporting a cocky little half-smile which lets you know you’ve been caught. Motherfucker he’s so hot. It’s unnerving. 
“Do you have something you’d like to say?” he asks politely, quite obviously containing his amusement. But you can’t summon a sufficiently sarcastic response. 
Your voice comes so soft when you reply, “you’re pretty.”
Spencer melts, eyes impossibly softening. 
“Pretty?” His smile is earnest now. He strokes your cheek and you can’t not lean into his touch. 
“Mhm. I want to, um…” your lips twist to the side as you look back down, finding he’s not gotten less intimidating since you last checked. “But what if I’m bad at it?” you whisper. He chuckles, brushing hair over your shoulder.  
“It’s kind of a hard thing to be bad at. And I’m gonna help you, okay?”
It’s the honesty with which he speaks to you that makes you feel so safe. There are no hidden intentions or words that seem to mean one thing but really mean another. Spencer wants you as a person more than he wants you as a body and that’s been clear since the first time he touched you. You take a deep breath. 
“Okay. What do I do?”
“First, you’re gonna spit in your hand.”
You look up, alarmed. 
“You want me to intentionally get my spit on you? Is that not your worst nightmare?”
“Believe it or not, I’m not super worried about yours,” he teases. “But if you’d prefer, I can spit in your hand.”
“Actually, mine is fine,” you laugh nervously. 
Hesitantly, you do as instructed, even though it seems frankly bizarre. 
“Good. Now just wrap your hand around it, like this.” His voice is quiet, focused as he guides your hand downward. Your heart rate ticks up again as he encourages you to wrap your hand around the base of his cock. He feels much warmer than you’d expected—his skin is silken beneath your touch but he’s undeniably hard and that sort of eliminates any sense of him being fragile from the equation. 
“It’s gonna be less sensitive down here—and then, up here—” he slides your hand back up, covering your thumb with his own and swiping it just below the head of his cock on the underside. He hisses and you look up in fascination. “That’s the most sensitive part.”
Without further instruction, you do it again, keeping your touch light and watching his face for a reaction. His drawn brows twitch, furrowing deeper for a second, and his lips part. A heavy exhalation passes between them and quickly builds into a breathy laugh. 
“What?” you murmur, over-eager to please and very nervous to do something wrong. 
“Nothing. Just feels good, that’s all.”
“Don’t laugh,” you pout. Of course that makes him laugh again, and he leans forward to kiss your head. 
“I’m laughing at myself, angel. I’m a grown man fighting for my life from a handjob that you’ve barely started. I knew it would be different with you but I didn’t realize it would be this different.”
Heat rises in your cheeks and you look away. 
“You don’t have to lie to make me feel better.”
“I’m not lying,” he urges, grabbing your free hand and encouraging you to uncurl your fingers. His thumb traces circles in your open palm, before capturing your entire hand in his. “Do you feel how much softer your hand is than mine?”
You frown, attempting to feel whatever it is that he’s pointing out. Despite the fact that you think he has very nice hands, you realize he’s right. By no means would you say that they’re rough, but you can tell where his gun normally sits in his hands, where his fountain pen rubs against his fingers. “Yeah.”
“Yeah. Anything you do is going to be perfect because it’s you.”
Spencer drops his hand to your leg, rubbing it soothingly. The other moves to cover yours—the one wrapped around him. 
“You’re gonna help me, right?” you ask quietly. Some adventurous part of you is very excited about this as an experiment—fascinated by the reactions you’ve already gotten from him and eager to push it. 
“I am. Little bit tighter, honey. I’ll tell you if it’s too much.”
You do as you’re told, and he’s murmuring more praise—slowly encouraging you to begin moving your hand with his own. A shaky exhale catches your attention, drawing your gaze to his face. His eyes are, of course, cast downward, but his expression is hypnotizing. Those lips remain slightly parted, and suddenly you wonder if he makes noises like you do. In that moment it becomes your life’s mission to find out. 
For a while you continue letting his hand guide your movements, but he keeps things so slow for your sake that you’re getting impatient. You forgo his direction, picking up the pace but trying to keep the rhythm he’d instilled in the motion. His hand slackens around yours. 
“Fuck,” he hisses to himself. The hand on your thigh rubs achingly deeper into the flesh. “Angel, what are you doing?”
“I want it to feel good.” Suddenly shy again, you slow down. His hips stutter, which you think may be a sign that it was working. “Am I—was that bad?” Spencer looses a breath, looking almost… frustrated?
“No, I’m just—I’m weirdly close to coming.”
“That’s a good thing, right?”
“Well,” he mutters, “not usually. Mostly it’s embarrassing.”
You giggle, a release of some tension, and begin pumping your hand again. His breath hitches and he finally looks up at you, meeting your eyes with his own lust-glazed ones. Heat pools deep between your legs. 
“I want you to come,” you admit quietly as you twist your wrist, brushing that spot underneath the head of his cock again. His jaw literally drops, and a look that is part confusion, part pleasure, twists his features. You see the surprise sparkling in his eyes and it only spurs you to keep talking. “I’ve never seen how you look when you do, but I’ve imagined it. I bet you look so pretty when you come, Spencer. ‘Nd then I would know that I can make you feel good, too.”
“You… you are making me feel good,” he assures you. The way his brow furrows and his  lips are parted give you a feeling that’s entirely new. Normally, you’re the one falling apart under his touch—but when it’s the other way around there’s a whole new kind of pleasure in it for you. You feel kind of powerful. Maybe even close to confident. 
“Really? I’m not this quiet when you touch me.”
“I’ve ha—ah—had more practice not making noise.”
“But why?” you implore, ignoring the fact that he’s slept with other women and enjoyed the sounds they made, and opting to brush your thumb across that extra sensitive part he definitely shouldn’t have told you about. His hips buck up and he hisses, which is immensely gratifying to you. 
“Because I like to listen.”
“What if I do, too?”
In a moment of divine inspiration , you cover the tip of his cock with your hand, swirling beads of pre-come over your palm. Spencer moans and his hips jut up into your grip. It’s a beautiful sound, just as you’d hoped. 
“Jesus, fuck.”
You understand why he seems to enjoy touching you so much. It’s so rewarding to watch as his breathing picks up and pleasure contorts his face—to watch him get messier and messier and lose his composure a bit more with each stroke of your hand. It’s so simple but Spencer looks at you like you’re exercising some arcane deviant power over him and he’s not sure he should be enjoying it as much as he is. 
Distantly you think about how it felt when he had his hands on you—and then, in clearer focus, how it felt when he went down on you. Both were perfect, but something about his lips so gentle on the most intimate, vulnerable part of you had felt like ascension. Maybe it was the emotional component, or maybe it just felt fucking good. Regardless, it seems an irresistible thought. 
You keep stroking him until his head is lolling on the back of the couch as he groans.
“Spencer?”
“Yeah, baby?”
He sounds so destroyed it makes you clench around nothing. Without any indication that you’re going to do so, you stop touching him, and the speed with which he lifts his head again is almost comical. Immediately, while he’s utterly defenseless and desperate, you ask, “can I use my mouth?” 
His eyes widen, and then shut, as he processes your request with a tiny shake of his head—probably trying to clear the haze of pleasure from his mind before he answers. 
“Honey,” he rasps eventually, opening his eyes and smoothing a hand over your hair, “you don’t have to do that just because I do. That’s not why I do it.”
“But I want to,” you murmur, shy and mildly embarrassed by what feels almost like a soft rejection. “I don’t think I could do anything, like, mind-blowing, but… I want to try.”
Your face is hot by the end of the sentence, and you can’t meet Spencer’s eyes as his fingers twitch over your hip. A quiet moment passes—but it’s short-lived.
“Okay. Go ahead, baby.”
Wide eyes dart up to his. 
“Really?”
Spencer smiles fondly, brushing an invisible speck from your cheek. 
“I don’t think I’m capable of turning that offer down. Not when it’s you.”
“Okay—um, should I just—” Spencer watches on, finding your sudden enthusiasm completely adorable as you scoot off of his lap and gingerly kneel in front of him. Your eyes are big and glassy as you look up at him, hands set politely on his knees. You squint suspiciously, eyes darting between his face and his cock, now about as hard as it’s ever been due to your toying. He knows it’s probably intimidating for a girl who has never seen one in real life, and he feels kind of bad about it. You do terrible, wonderful things to him that he doesn’t understand. “Wow. So... it looks bigger from down here.”
“Please don’t try to choke yourself,” he instructs hurriedly, leaning forward slightly. “I really don’t need you to do that. It’s fine if you can’t fit it all, I just—” he exhales shakily. Spencer is most definitely strong-willed but he can’t pretend like the sight of you on your knees for him, inches from his aching cock for the first time isn’t impacting his cognition. Most importantly he doesn’t want to make you feel pressured. He’s trying to not let how badly he wants this show in case you change your mind. 
Spencer watches as you psych yourself out—wilting like a thirsty flower. 
“But what if I’m bad at this?” you mumble, hands curling into loose fists atop his legs. Spencer pushes your hair back, tucking it behind your ears. 
“What’s your worst case scenario?” he asks. Your answer is immediate. 
“That I’m so bad you make me stop halfway through.”
Spencer can’t help but laugh again. 
“I’m sorry—I just… honey, you are really underestimating how profound your effect is on me. I just almost came from a minute long handjob. I can assure you that I won’t make you stop halfway through because I’d rather not have your mouth on me. That is… that’s just not going to happen.”
You lean your cheek against his thigh. He might actually pass away. 
“Will you tell me if I’m doing something wrong?”
“Honestly, as long as you don’t bite, you’re in the clear.”
Your eyes squeeze shut and your lips pull into an embarrassed little smile. 
“Great. Thank you for that invaluable advice.”
“Of course,” he smiles. It fades slowly as you take a deep breath and look up at him, obviously steeling yourself, before leaning forward and taking him in your hand again. He watches with bated breath, repeating no sudden movements to himself over and over as your hand moves up and down a few more times and your head lowers. 
You delicately, so lightly trace your tongue from the base of his swollen cock to just underneath the leaking tip, mapping a vein, and his hips buck as you take him into your mouth experimentally. Only the first few inches fit but the sight of your lips wrapped around him, the way you’re looking at him is so unbelievably erotic Spencer knows he won’t last very long.
From a purely technical perspective—he knows he’s gotten objectively better head. Still, something about the way you’re so delicate with him, so soft and timid in the way you lick and kiss and take him into your mouth has him fighting not to come already. Maybe it’s wrong, but knowing that he’s watching you do this for the first time in your life is obscenely arousing. The idea that you’ve never trusted another person this much; that you’re letting him be the one to help you navigate something as new and as important as sexuality. The more he thinks about it, though, the more he realizes: it’s not your inexperience that turns him on. It’s just you. Everything you do is so undeniably you—he recognizes your mannerisms in every tiny motion, in every glance, and it’s killing him. You’re like a dream as you look up at him with big nervous eyes, (no, really, he has had this dream) and he remembers he wants to be reassuring you—not pondering life and human connection. 
“Look at you,” he murmurs, groaning and hips twitching as your cheeks hollow, wrapping his achingly hard cock in soft gentle warmth so sweetly it feels taboo. “So good, baby. So gorgeous like this.”
You whine around him, receptive as always to his obsequious praise, and he notices the way your hips wiggle as you seek friction. God, you must like this a lot. Spencer gathers your hair into a makeshift ponytail, resting his hand on your head as you begin to bob it. That, he wasn’t prepared for. He’d have been satisfied with just kitten-licks and suckling but he won’t complain about this. It’s slow, and so intentional as you keep watching him for feedback cues. Ever his observant girl, you’re constantly paying attention. Aware of his reactions. He needs to keep telling you you’re good or else you’ll assume you’re terrible. 
“Over-achiever,” he whispers through a little smile as you down even more of him. 
Spencer is for the most part a kind and gentle person. For better or worse he is also a man, and he can’t help but fantasize about getting you all teary and drooly as he holds your mouth open and sees how much of his cock he can push down your throat. But again—kind. Gentle. So when you get a little over-zealous, attempting to sacrifice your comfort for his pleasure, he pulls your head back slightly. “That’s far enough, angel. That’s—fuck. God, you’re good at this.” The words are thoughtless, muttered to himself more than you as he watches through a haze while you look up at him with glassy, half-lidded eyes, slipping him in and out of your warm mouth, a little faster now as you gain confidence. 
You whine desperately around him, like you’re the one nearing orgasm and not him. The sound of your pleasure as you suck his cock makes him dizzy. His hips buck, pressing him a little deeper into your mouth. “Jesus fucking Christ,” he exhales. “Slow down, baby. I’m—” a louder moan from him like you’ve never heard as he thrusts shallowly turns you on profoundly. He’s so much more vocal than you’d have imagined—sonically and verbally. He breathes out a quick, “fuck, fuck, fuck,” pulling your hair slightly, and you’ve never wanted to touch yourself more but you know you can’t focus on both. Instead you work on making him come—you can worry about you later. He says your name, with an authoritative edge to his tone that makes you throb. “Honey, if you don’t stop, I’m gonna come—”
You swirl your tongue around the top of him like candy and he’s done for. Spencer tries to pull out, which only results in cum both in your mouth and on your face. The orgasm is his strongest in recent memory, and he grunts, watching your lips part and a little squeak escape as he comes all over your face—but you keep stroking him all the while. Once he’s 90% sure it’s over, he falls against the back of the couch, breathing heavily and looking down at you through hazy eyes. Oh, he’s going to feel terrible about this in a few seconds—but right now you look fucking perfect. Your eyes are wide, nervous as his essence drips over your face and down your neck—he groans when you swallow cautiously, averting his eyes to the ceiling lest he do another thing he regrets. 
“Baby, I am so sorry,” he mutters, forcibly clearing the haze of orgasm from his mind and sitting up, fixing his pants and looking around before locating the box of tissues on the side table. “I’m so, so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” You look up at him attentively as he wipes himself from your face as gently as he can. 
“Why not?”
“Because I didn’t ask you first. I wasn’t thinking clearly.”
Spencer guides your head around by your chin, wiping your jaw and lips. 
“It’s okay, Spence, I—”
“No, it’s not,” he cuts you off, trying to at least turn his guilt into a learning experience for you. He’s not deluded enough to think someone like you will stay with someone like him forever, because sometimes he does things like that, and he’s reminded that there are certainly people out there more deserving of you. At the very least he can clarify that nobody should ever do what he just did to you. “It’s really not nice to do that to someone.”
“Do you care what I think at all?”
Spencer freezes, finally forcing himself to look you in the eye. Despite the fact that he’s mad at himself, he’s sure it’s coming across as being directed at you. And he knows you’re sensitive, especially about this kind of thing. 
“Of course, I do, baby. I’m sorry. Do you want to come back up here with me and tell me what you’re thinking?” he murmurs, cupping your jaw. Hesitantly you nod. The tissues end up on the table—which he will be thoroughlywiping down later—before you crawl back into his lap from the floor. Spencer helps you settle against him, hoping he hasn’t messed this up irreversibly. He keeps his voice quiet as he rubs your leg. “What were you going to say?”
“I was going to say,” you begin, “that it’s fine, because you’ll remember to ask next time. And because… I kind of liked it. I like when—when you do stuff like that.”
It’s a miracle he can hear you with the way your voice drops into an almost-whisper and you’re hiding against his shirt. 
“Like what?” he murmurs. Although he’s not sure he’ll be able to handle the answer. 
“Like… I don’t know. Like you can do whatever you want to me. Like I’m literally yours.” Each word makes you cringe further, but Spencer has to try hard to maintain a cool facade as he processes this. If he’s going to try and be chivalrous, you’ll have to move away from this topic—this revelation—immediately. Thankfully, you seem eager to move on. “So… how did I do?”
He almost laughs. It seems exceedingly obvious how you did, but as per usual, you require verbal reassurance. 
“That was really good, baby. You did well.”
You blossom. 
“Really?”
“I wouldn’t lie.”
“Was I the best girl out of all of the other girls?” 
I wasn’t in love with any of the other girls. 
Just barely, he manages to stop himself from saying it, pinwheeling his arms on the edge of a very steep verbal cliff. The realization that he’s been in love with you for a while hits him like a truck. But he can’t tell you that right now. He should wait until you’re less vulnerable.
Fuck. 
He really wants to tell you right now. 
“Actually—don’t answer that,” you decide, while all of this happens in his head in less than a few seconds. “I want to go back to pretending I’m the only girl you’ve ever seen in your life.”
“You’re the only one that matters,” he offers, relieved to express at least some portion of the much bigger truth. Then he frowns. “Not that the other women I’ve met don’t lead important lives. I actually know a lot of incredibly influential and intelligent people who are women. I have deep respect for all of them. Am I helping or making it worse?” he rambles. You giggle. He has his answer. “What about you? How do you feel?” he asks after a moment, tenderly, lowly, stroking your hair as you lean against his chest. 
It takes you a moment to deliberate, fiddling with the fabric of his shirt. 
“I feel good. I, um… liked it a lot more than I would have thought.”
“Well, that’s good. Much better than if you had hated every second of it.”
You hum in agreement, and he waits for you to say whatever you’re holding back. It comes sooner than he’d have anticipated. 
“I feel bad about the times before. How did you just… go to sleep after? Were you not, like—insanely turned on? Not that I’m, like, irresistibly sexy, or whatever—you know what I mean.”
Spencer smiles because he knows you can’t see him. 
“I wasn’t doing it to pressure you into feeling obligated to reciprocate, I guess. My line of reasoning was that it would be less intimidating if I didn’t even present it as an option until you wanted to try.”
“Oh.”
Spencer thinks he sees where this is going. 
“Why?” he asks, leaning back and encouraging you to look at him. “Are you insanely turned on?”
“Wh—that’s—I didn’t say that!”
Spencer can feel how warm your cheeks are as he presses his lips to the side of your face. 
“You can tell me if you are,” he murmurs, all smiley as he moves to kiss your lips. “If you want something, you need to ask for it. I’m not a mind reader.”
“Yes you are,” you grumble. “That’s literally what behavioral analysis is.”
Not quite true, but surprisingly, he doesn’t feel the need to explain to you the semantics of what he does for work right now. 
“What got you all excited?”
“You know what,” you mumble, trying to look away again. Spencer doesn’t allow it this time, gently grabbing your jaw. 
“Yes, I do. But I want you to tell me. If you want me to make you feel good, this is how you’re going to convince me that you deserve it.”
You whine wordlessly, looking at him with those big, lust-glazed eyes.
“You wanted me to teach you how to use your words, right? This is it. I’m giving you an opportunity. If you don’t want to, that’s okay. Maybe we can take a nap, like you said earlier.”
“No! I liked—um, I liked all of it. I didn’t know if I would, because I was really nervous. But when I first—you know—and you got all quiet… it was like you couldn’t even talk for a minute. I was kind of proud of that. Because normally nobody can ever get you to stop talking.” Spencer narrows his eyes incredulously, a small smile tugging at his lips. But he doesn’t interrupt—not when it seems you’re finally starting to get more confident in your words. “And I really liked the noises you made. I think that was my favorite part. I liked when you pulled my hair back, and how you spoke to me. And when… when you got me messy and I had to swallow it. I really liked how it felt because I couldn’t think of anything else, just making you feel good. I really wanted to… make you proud, I guess. Is that weird?”
Spencer shakes his head no, a fond smile on his face when your eyes meet his again. 
“No. It’s a pretty normal thing to feel when you’re nervous and wanting to impress someone you care about. And I would have been proud no matter what, for the record. You were being very brave.”
You pull your bottom lip between your teeth, watching him expectantly. Spencer should have known you’re too needy to truly absorb anything he says to you right now. Which is actually pretty cute. Everything you do is endearing to him. 
“Stand up.”
You frown. 
“But—”
“Just stand up,” he demands calmly, preferring to think of himself as firm and not bossy. 
You do, looking rather annoyed and confused as you plant yourself in front of him. 
“Why?”
“You are so full of questions.” His hands slip up the side of your legs, under your skirt, and hook in the waistband of your underwear. Spencer looks up at you meaningfully and you nod, swallowing. 
As he pulls down, Spencer can literally feel the resistance of the fabric clinging to your soaked core. Under his touch the skin of your thighs is warm and soft. He wants to feel it on either side of his face, he wants to hear you whine as his stubble rubs against it, he wants to feel it clamp around his wrist, he wants it between his teeth and he definitely wants it pressing against his hips as he—
But no. 
There will be time for all of those things—especially the last one—later. For now, he’ll reach between your legs just to see—
“Oh, my god,” Spencer half-chuckles, half-groans, upon feeling how wet you truly are for him. He drags his knuckles from your dripping entrance up over your clit, pinching very lightly and earning a squeak from you which he ignores. “You really did like having your mouth full of me, huh?”
“I told you,” you breathe, visibly relaxing some as he continues to play with you for a moment. Then he pulls his hand away again, patting his thigh. 
“Sit.”
“You want me to…”
“Yes,” he says, simply. 
“But is it not going to… am I not going to mess up your pants?”
“You are even more neurotic about messiness than I am. I can wash them, honey. Come here.”
Spencer guides your hips over his thigh, watching your pretty face twist with uncertainty as you fully settle on him. Fuck, he can feel your warmth through the fabric instantly. Already he’s getting hard again. 
“What am I supposed to do?” you whisper, bunching his shirt in your fists. Spencer slides your skirt up higher, revealing the way you’re nestled against his thigh. He spreads you a little further apart, exposing more of your clit to the material underneath you. Immediately you press against him—he watches the delicate flesh rubbing gingerly against him and  his grip tightens ever so slightly. 
“All you have to do is rock back and forth. It’s easy.”
Already you’re starting to do it—but he guesses it’s like earlier where you don’t even realize it’s happening. 
“But… I wanted your mouth,” you admit, quietly, slinging your arms around his neck and burying your face there. 
“Do this for me first. Just get yourself off like this one time and then you can have my mouth. You said you wanted to help me feel better because I’m tired today, right?
“Yes,” you mumble, squirming over him. 
“Well, there are a lot of days when I get back home and I’m tired. I’m gonna need you to be able to get on top of me, just like this, and make me feel better. And I know you don’t know what it feels like to have something that deep inside of you yet, but it’s gonna be a lot. Even once you know how it feels to have me inside when you’re underneath me. I need you to practice for me right now so you’ll be ready, okay?”
You could come from the words alone. You nod, dazed with need as you roll your hips in a circle, pressing his thigh against your clit. 
��Back and forth, baby,” he murmurs, guiding your hips forward with his hands locked around them. “Back and forth, just like this…”
You moan quietly, shamelessly, eyes fluttering as you look down and watch your clit dragging over the darkening fabric. It’s easier if you isolate your hips, grinding down without moving your legs or upper body at all. 
“It feels really good,” you whisper under your quickening breath. 
“Yeah? Does it?”
“Mhm.”
“Good, angel. You look like you know what you’re doing.”
It’s audible now, quiet and wet and dirty. 
“I don’t,” you breathe. He sucks in a breath of his own, stilling your hips with fingers pressed deep into your flesh. 
“Sit up, baby.” You really wish he would stop making you stop, but you don’t want to keep going in case he needs you to quit—so you rise slowly, thighs trembling as you kneel. Spencer groans at the strings of your arousal momentarily connecting your core to his pants before they snap, getting your inner thighs wet. There’s a dark, very wet patch over his thigh, shining like glass. He thumbs over your slick clit absentmindedly as he looks up at you like you’re a miracle. “You’re fucking soaked. I’ve never seen you like this. Is this all from making me come?”
You nod feverishly, hips grinding against nothing in search of friction. He sits you back down on his leg, allowing you to sloppily find your rhythm again. Spencer bounces his leg lightly and you cry out softly, buckling forward. His arms wrap around you, still pressing you down against his thigh as you rut against it. 
“You’re sweet. Maybe I should have known how much you’d like it when I came all over your pretty face. You really like hearing that you did a good job, huh? I bet you like it even more when I prove it to you.”
You moan a “yeah,” barely processing his words. 
“My good girl even swallowed on her first try. Took it so well. And now look at how you’re taking this. You’re gonna love riding, baby. Just going to be another thing you’re good at as soon as you try it.”
“Spencer,” you gasp, overwhelmed by the praise. He’s bouncing his leg at regular intervals and everything is so sensitive.
“I know it’s harder to finish this way, but just one time, remember? And then you can have my tongue for as long as you want. You are my only plan for the day. Just give me one like this.”
But it’s not really harder to finish this way. Then again, you’re so turned on you could probably finish if a breeze hit you just right. Regardless, the thought of him going down on you again pushes you even closer to the edge.
You don’t know how much time goes by like that, you rubbing against him like it’s the last thing you’ll ever do, him pressing up into you until the pressure is so taut it snaps. There’s no time to warn him, but you suppose you don’t really need to. You writhe against him, caught between wanting to keep going and not being able to take more stimulation. He lifts you up just slightly, trying to separate you from his leg. You exhale deeply as your body relaxes, already close to dozing off against his chest.
“We can’t have you tapping out just yet. I still have to fulfill my end of the deal.”
In the end, he fulfills it three times over, and you end up showing your appreciation in kind one more time—much slower and more comfortably in his bed. He gives you plenty of time to learn what he likes, taking your teasing and coquettish explorations like a champ and never so much as tightening his grip in your hair. Turns out, you don't exactly spend the day doing nothing.
And you do end up taking that nap after all. Just... much, much later. And with less clothing on.
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writingwithfolklore · 7 months
Text
Punctuation Rules
Punctuation is like the very last thing I actively think about when writing something (what's the point of fixing the punctuation of a sentence you'll end up taking out or editing anyway?) but it is still an important step!
Having proper punctuation increases your credibility and the overall quality of your work. Also, it’s doubly important in professional work, emails, and resumes. With that, let’s get into it!
Commas
We use them all the time. We get them wrong all the time. There are six rules for where you can use commas:
Use to separate items in a list or series:
The book was long, tedious, and painful.
The comma after tedious is called the Oxford’s comma. Feel free to debate if you need it in the reblogs, but you won’t get in trouble professionally if you use it or leave it out (in most cases.) It always comes before ‘and’ in a list to prevent confusion of the items:
I ran into my mother, my best friend and a scientist. (1 person?)
Is very different from
I ran into my mother, my best friend, and a scientist. (3 people)
2. Use to separate independent clauses, with a coordinating conjunction.
An independent clause is just a sentence that makes sense on its own.
A coordinating conjunction is: and, but, or so.
Miley had a ton of work to do, so she set her alarm early.
3. Use after an introductory statement.
Introductory statements begin with many different words, but typically: Before, after, when, while, as soon as, etc.
Before her first class, Stacy looked up her prof on Rate Your Teacher.
Main point about this, “Before her first class” is not an independent clause, it needs a second part.
4. Use to surround info in a sentence
This info is not essential to the sense-making of the sentence, but it should be relevant.
Parents, no matter how skilled, cannot function at 100% all the time.
5. Addresses and Dates
6. And with direct quotes
Important for essay writing.
Casey said, “I hate this house!”
Colons:
Introduce a list after a complete sentence:
I have three favourite foods: spaghetti, chowder, and garlic bread.
2. Use after ‘the following’ or ‘as follows’
Please provide the following information: your date of birth, full name, and address.
3. Don't use with sentence fragments
A sentence fragment is an unfinished sentence (that doesn’t make sense on its own).
My favourite foods are: spaghetti, chowder, and garlic bread.
This is wrong because, “My favourite foods are.” Isn’t an independent clause.
4. Introduce an explanation
My parents ask one thing of me: that I try my hardest.
5. Introduce a quotation
Mom always quoted the bible: “The truth will set you free.”
6. And times (12:00)
Semi-Colon:
Not super common, but makes you look good if you can use it properly.
Separate two related independent clauses
I never drink Starbucks; it tastes burnt.
2. Similar, but with conjunctions: however, moreover, therefore, nevertheless, etc.
I don’t like Starbucks; however, it does the job.
Agatha didn’t witness anything; nevertheless, she was called in to court.
3. Use to avoid misreading in a series
The invited guests are the club leader; the treasurer; the new member, Jason Tanner; and Wanda Johnson, the investor.
Semicolons clarify the separation between the four people. Had it been, “The club leader, the treasurer, The new member, Jason Tanner…” it would seem that the new member and Jason Tanner are two different people.
Apostrophes – Possessive
‘s shows possession of a singular noun
The girl’s parents were quite rich.
2. S’ shows possession of a plural noun
The students’ books were all over the place. (there are multiple students who have books)
3. ‘s to singular words ending in s, and nouns that are plural
My boss’s office My children’s toys
Apostrophes – Contractions
Use to combine two words (they are, he is, there is, etc.)
It is -> It’s a beautiful park They are -> They’re really good friends You are -> you’re good at this and so on.
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papercorgiworld · 4 months
Text
Tutoring first years
The things Theodore Nott does for love.
There was a request to write more about the scenarios from ‘Pansy’s Interrogation I’. This ended up being a lot longer than expected so I thought I would post both stories separately. Hope you like this one. And I hope to finish Mattheo’s tomorrow.
Warning: suggestiveness, not proofread
If you want a little more context, you can read Pansy’s interrogation, but it’s not a must.
The first tutoring class didn’t go as planned. You were helping three kids with transfigurations, Digorry was helping five kids with herbology and Theodore found himself stuck teaching potions to dumb and dumber. When the Ravenclaw first year next to Theo shakes his head after Theo had explained something for the third time, Theo rolls his eyes and sighs.
He mutters something in Italian and lets his eyes wander around the room before returning his attention to the kid next to him. To Theodore’s surprise the kid looks all pouty and tears are welling up. Just great. “Potions is not that difficult, no need to cry about it.” The Ravenclaw sniffs a bit before looking up at Theo. “My mother is Italian, I know you just called me stupid.” Theodore’s eyes almost pop out and he quickly glances over to you, fortunately you haven’t taken notice yet. “Look you’re clearly as bad at Italian as you’re in potions, ‘cause I didn’t say you were stupid.” The other kid sitting at Theodore’s table grimaces, knowing that that was the wrong thing to say.
The Ravenclaw starts sobbing softly and you walk over. “What’s wrong, Alan?” You ask, concerned about what’s going on. Theodore pretends to be sympathetic and equally concerned, but in his mind he’s cursing the kid. Alan, right that’s the crybaby’s name. You better keep your mouth shut. “He called me dumb in Italian and I know because my mom speaks Italian.” Theodore stares daggers at the kid. You nod calmly, but you really don’t know what to say. “Well, I’m sure Theo didn’t mean it that way. Theo, a word please.” Theodore forces a half smile and gets up, but can’t help but whisper with poison in his voice: “Snitch.”.
You walk to the hallway and Theodore closes the door behind him. “You can’t call someone dumb, Theo.” Theodore just rolls his eyes, that dumb Ravenclaw really ruined it for him. “He wasn’t supposed to understand.” A soft smile tugs at your lips at his lame excuse, but you suppress it. “You need to support them, help them gain confidence. It’s not because they’re slow learners that they’re stupid.” You explain. “Yeah, I know, but there’s a difference between being a slow learner and being a little slow.” You smack Theo with the book you were holding. “Auch, woman, no need for that. I promise I’ll keep my mouth shut in every language from now on.” You narrow your eyes at him. “You better.” Theo can’t help but lick his lips as he again sees a smile tug on your lips. You both return to your students and Theodore really gives his all trying to help the kids.
***
Theodore enters the Slytherin common room with an exhausting expression and his friends immediately take notice. “How did professor Nott do? Were the kids paying attention?” Blaise asks with a humored smile plastered on his face. Theodore just sighs. “Apparently, I’m not allowed to call them dumb.” Pansy can’t help but laugh. “Oh, but that just takes the fun out of it.” Mattheo complains. “All this for a girl?” Draco questions with a mocking tone. Theodore eyes shoot up in annoyance at Draco but he ignores him and calmly reaches for his cigarettes, while nudging Mattheo as a nonverbal invitation to head up to the astronomy tower. Theo was not in the mood for more teasing.
***
Theodore takes his seat at the table with dumb and dumber. “See, I’m not stupid.” Alan says with a proud voice as he shows Theodore his latest potions test. Theo carefully examines the paper. “Look at that, not a total knucklehead after all. Let’s review this week’s material four times as well and get another grade like this.” Both kids smile at Theodore’s weird way of complimenting. You can’t help but feel butterflies as you watch Theo work and laugh with the kids.
The feeling is totally mutual, because every time Theodore looks over to you he can’t help but stare and fall in love a little more. It’s even so bad that he’s starting to worry that the two dumbasses next to him might notice. You focussed on teaching the kids to hold their wand properly and make the right movements so they don’t accidentally set something on fire. Suddenly you hear an outburst of giggling coming from Theodore’s table. You look up to see a slightly flustered Theo shushing his table and when he looks up he gives you an awkward smile making you blush.
Now not only his friends are giving Theo a hard time about his crush his students had joined in as well. Theodore almost chased them out when the tutoring hour had passed. “You really seem to get along with them, I’m glad.” You say and Theodore just raises his eyebrows telling you the kids were still a lot of work. He can’t help but stare as a giggle escapes you. When the silence gets a bit weird you decide to thank Theodore. “You really are my hero for doing this. It means a lot to the kids and to me. Honestly, I really didn’t expect you to sign up but I’m glad you did. You do more than just teach, you inspire these kids.” Theo shoves his hands in his pockets and looks down at his feet. He can’t shake the sad feeling that you see him as this nice person who wants to help first years, while his true motives are as selfish as can be. He wants to be honest with you but he knows that no good will come of it. “Yeah, I never expected it to be this valuable. I’m glad I signed up.”
Your paths split when you tell him you have to visit Dumbledore to report about the tutoring project. Theodore quietly walks to the Slytherin common room not looking forward to more teasing. “Well well teach, how did it go?” Draco chimes as soon as he spots Theo, who just rolls his eyes in response. “Did you make a move on her?” Mattheo asks sincerely curious. “No, I was busy with Alan and Shane and she was busy teaching kids proper wand movement.” Mattheo nods, but can’t keep his mind from thinking a little dirty. “Just a little longer of playing tutor and she’ll help you out with wand movement as well.” Mattheo wiggles his eyebrows suggestively and Enzo is the first to laugh at the horrible joke, while Blaise just shakes his head. However, Mattheo’s face goes pale in horror as he sees you enter the common room with wide eyes. You clearly heard him. Mattheo tries to subtly signal Theo to keep his mouth shut and turn around, but Theo doesn’t catch on. “Yeah, nothing’s more sexy than a sweet guy helping out dumb kids. I’m definitely winning her over.”
Mattheo grabs Theo’s arm forcing him to turn around. Suddenly all eyes are on you and give Theo a fake smile. “Real sexy.” Theodore wants to say something, but you won’t let him. “I came to tell you that Dumbledore is awarding each tutor an extra 40 house points for their selfless hard work, enjoy.” You turn on your heels and Theodore just curses himself.
***
The next morning at breakfast Alan and Shane walk up to Theodore with sad faces. “(Y/n) said you won’t be helping us anymore.” Theodore can’t look up to them. It was his fault he hurt you and disappointed his favorite morons. “Why? Are we that hopeless?” One of them asks and Theodore immediately protests. “No, no. Don’t ever think that. Neither of you are geniuses, but you’re far from hopeless. I’m the dumb one. I’m too stupid to be teaching you guys something.” The kids look confused, but nod with pouty faces and leave.
“That’s just sad.” Enzo says, feeling bad for everyone involved. Theodore sighs and searches for your face. By Salazar, how did I get myself in this mess. “Not all hope is lost.” Pansy sighs when she sees everyone depressed about Theo’s situation. In an instant all eyes are on her. “She’s obviously very upset and I think that’s because she’s really disappointed.” So far Theodore found no words of encouragement. “I think she’s so disappointed because she really really liked you. Which means you can still win her back.”
***
You joined Cedric outside on a bench and sighed. “I know we were already short on tutors, but keeping Nott in the project was just wrong.” He gives you a sympathetic smile, but doesn’t say anything. “Look, we will find someone better.” After a moment of silence you speak up again sounding desperate. “Any suggestions? I have no idea who we could ask.” Cedric was about to say something reassuring when he saw Hermoine and Harry walk up to them. “Look, I know I said I didn’t have time, but I’ll make time. I’ll help you with the tutoring project.” Hermoine rants and Harry just nods. “I will help as well.” Luna and two other Ravenclaw join you as well. “Can we still sign up for the tutoring project?” Your eyebrows knit together in confusion, but you nod and hand them all a flyer with information. “Odd.” Cedric blurs with his face in a frown as he watches everyone walk away after they signed up. You just nod in agreement.
It’s then that you spot Blaise and Enzo walk up to your bench. “We’re here to sign up as tutors.” Okay, now I’m sure. Something’s off. “Why?” You ask, sounding meaner than you intended and making Cedric give you a disapproving look. “Because being a first year is scary, you learn so much and it’s overwhelming. I want to inspire them to continue learning and see the fun in it.” You frown a little surprised by Enzo’s argument, but you hand him the flyer anyway. Next your eyes land on Blaise who takes a deep breath. “Tutoring is a great opportunity to work on social skills by learning to encourage young minds. It also looks good on your resume.” You can’t help but laugh at his monotonous voice. “Did Theo put you up this?” You ask and Enzo gives you an awkward smile.
“He knows you’re short on tutors so he spent his day recruiting tutors for you.” You roll your eyes and huff. When you get up Cedric grabs your wrist and forces you to sit back down. “Hear them out. Nott is a slow learner, but that doesn't mean you should give up on him for doing one dumb thing.” Enzo nods. “He really cares about your project, even if it’s just because it’s ‘your’ project. He wants to help.” You feel the butterflies return, but it’s Blaise’s argument that convinces you to forgive Theo. “Honestly, is it that bad of a thing that the guy tried to impress you by helping others? Looks more like a win win to me.” You can’t help but smile. Maybe it really isn’t that bad.
***
As you approached the quidditch stadium you could already spot Theodore flying thanks to his messy hair. Your hand reaches up to your cheek as you feel yourself heat up. How did that idiot get you feeling like this by just being nearby? When you enter the stadium Draco is the first one to see you and he yells at Theo, who immediately flies down to meet you.
“Hey.” You can’t help but giggle at his meek voice, making him feel a little embarrassed. You take a few steps towards him. “I have enough tutors for every student now.” He smiles content at the good news. “Except for one student, Alan, so I was hoping you would come back. He’s rather fond of you.” Theodore shakes his head in agreement as he closes the last bit of distance between you two. “I would like that. I was missing the little bugger already.”
“And I also wanted to ask you for a favor.” You ask and lick your lips, making Theo’s mind go crazy with anticipation. “Anything.” He curses himself internally for sounding like a simp. “Would you mind tutoring me as well?” Theodore’s eyes drown in yours. “Definitely, what class?” You lean into him and let your hand wander over his chest, slowly making its way down. “Just something extra curricular.” Your hand rubs his crotch, earning you a soft sound from Theodore as his eyes fill with lust. At your touch his brain shuts down. “Of course, it’s very important to stay underneath- I mean on top of extra curricular activities. Both are fine really.” You can’t help but smirk a little as you notice how easily his brain got fried under your touch. “Later.” You say and turn around with a cheeky smile. Theodore swallows and tries to regain composure.
”Smooth.” Theodore rolls his eyes as he turns around to spot a smirking Mattheo and laughing Draco.
Bonus: Theo simping for you
“Of course, it’s very important to stay underneath- I mean on top of extra curricular activities. Both are fine really.”
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His mind is all about those extra curricular activities.
Picture source: https://pin.it/4OsJcVNGA
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hazelfoureyes · 2 months
Text
Besties get Banged
Angel Dust x FemReader Smut
➽─❥Angel Dust x MaleReader Smut version
You didn’t think Angel liked you the way you did him, how could you? While sharing a profession, he was nothing like you. He was the star in every room he entered. After being booked on a shoot together, you find maybe Angel wasn’t so ignorant to your existence.
Warning/Promises: Angel x Reader do not fuck but they do get banged, Val is going to ruin shit but I ain’t writing that part, Foursome but no one cares, handjob, cum countdown 💦, masturbation, making out, porno, vaguely threatening ending from Val
minors dni (👁️👄👁️🔪)
When Angel Dust slipped into the dressing room of Val’s ‘sex dungeon’, you struggled to keep your smile down. You’d never actually worked together. The two of you had attended the same awards shows, frequented the same clubs, danced the same stages. But never graced the same screen. Every encounter left you more and more enthralled. Always the life of the party, but when the crowds would die down Angel would become so sweet, talking with an emotional intelligence many sinners seemed to have lacked or intentionally abandoned at death.
Angel threw himself at many people, sometimes jokingly, sometimes not. But you’d be lying to say it didn’t sting he’d never propositioned you.
“Mornin’,” he plopped into the make-up chair beside you, hand lazily combing through his bedhead.
Angel hoped you hadn’t seen him pause when he saw you. He didn’t get butterflies often, but you always managed to make his stomach flutter. He felt so silly, a kid with a crush.
You knew Val wasn’t going to let it be just the two of you. He enjoyed watching you both get fucked too much. ‘Besties get Banged’ was written on the clapperboard. Angel gave you a wink, “Ooh besties! Is this work or just another Friday night?” His elbow hit a soft spot in your ribs, making you laugh.
“Stop— st-stop that. Get on the bed.” Val used all four arms to separate you, “Bitch number 1 on the left side, Bitch number 2 on the right.” He sat in his chair, arm angrily motioning for the large demons to enter the set already.
It was a standard enough shoot, until you and Angel found yourselves both on your knees, eye to eye from across the pink heart shaped bed. One yellow and one black eye looking back at you, hazy with pleasure as he was fucked dumb by some piece of muscle with a dick attached.
He looked so beautiful when he felt good. You reached out your hand to him, then the other. Fingers laced together, you both moaned into the space between yourselves. Angel’s eyebrows rose up, tongue coming out. His face was so flushed, cheeks pink. You weren’t sure it was an invitation, but you pulled yourself to him and ran your tongue over his. The demon behind you followed your body, trying to maintain contact.
Angel’s eyes rolled closed, tongue pushing into your mouth. The kiss interrupted again and again as the repeated pounding into your holes pulled your lips apart, your entire bodies moving in rhythm.
“Hey!,” Val yelled, “What the fuck are you doing?”
Angel smiled at you, “Whats the matter Val?” He strained forward, capturing your mouth again.
“Stop kissing! You’re ruining it!”
“You never kissed a bestie? Awww,” Angel kept his lips near yours. “Val’s never had a real good friend before.”
Val’s antennae bristled, “Pull em apart, they’re making googly eyes at each other. Killing my fucking hard on. I’ve got a reputation to maintain.”
Your bodies were slid away, fingertips still reaching out to each other. You were flipped onto your back, pacing brutal as if making up for lost time.
Angel watched you, mouth lonely. His cock leaking from just a kiss. Reaching down, he began to stroke himself while enjoying his own personal show. Your body bouncing with the thrusts, eyes watery. He arched his back, looking across to where your body connected with the other demon. You looked so wet, so inviting.
“Angel!” Val seethed.
Angel’s closed his eyes, imagining you around his cock and not his fingers. His eyes shot open when he felt hands on his face. His fear dissolved into relief as he saw you had scooted back towards him, pulling him down for an upside-down kiss. Breath hot, he moaned into your mouth.
“Uh Boss, should we stop em again? It’s kinda hot.” The shark demon behind Angel slowed.
Your fingers slipped through his hair, bringing him deeper into your kiss. There was nothing else in the room anymore but you and Angel. Tongue rolling over tongue, breathy moans exhaled and inhaled.
Val shook his head, “Let the little sluts kiss. If they wanna ruin my shoot so badly, be my guests.” His eyes aglow, Valentino exhaled his toxic smoke throughout the studio, sinister grin spreading across his face.
The demons continued as directed, you and Angel not having noticed the interruption you had caused. Angel’s mouth left yours, head resting on the mattress.
“Val’s going to kill us,” you tried to remember the name of the wolf demon pounding into you, knowing you had some sort of lines.
Angel’s teeth nipped your ear lobe, “He’s gonna do that anyway.”
You moaned, “Feels good when you do that.”
“Yeah?” The wolf asked. You wanted to kick him in the neck.
“Uuh, yeah. You… fuck me so good, Daniel.”
“Donny.” He corrected.
Angel got back on his elbows, “Literally no one cares, David.” Whispering now, “Roll over and come ‘ere.”
Douglas didn’t seem bothered, you using your feet to stop him and twisting around his cock to get back on your knees. The demons whose names neither of you cared to learn followed you again. Angel was pressed into you, two arms holding you against his body, one arm on your cheek, a fourth finding its way to your clit.
You gasped, Angel licking up your neck and chin as his hand expertly rubbed you. Regaining some bit of your brain, you reached down a hand to his cock. It was slapping against this stomach in time with the thrusts. Your hand only need to grip him, the other actor basically fucking him into your grasp.
Angel’s head craned down, sucking bruises into your collar bone, “I wanna fuck you so bad, it hurts.” Another whisper into your skin.
“I thought you didn’t like me,” your words faded in and out, volume jumping as your pussy took hit after hit. Angel’s hand electrifying every part of your body.
Angel pulled you as close as he could, bringing your hand from his cock to hold in his. Now him and his pre-cum were rubbing along your stomachs, pressed together tightly. “Wrong. So wro-uh.” Eyes rolling back, Angel’s words fell apart.
“You close?”
He nodded.
“Want me to count you down?”
A more frantic nod.
“Five”
You leaned in to kiss at his neck.
“Four”
A long drag of your tongue up to his ear.
“Three”
A kiss to his cheek.
“Two”
You bit at his lip, pulling it with you before letting it go.
“One”
Angel clenched his eyes, grip on you tightening as he came across your stomach, thick and hot. You heard the other actor moan, Angel’s ass tightening with his release.
You took the chance to kiss Angel again, lips soft and swollen from the long shoot. His cum dripped down your stomach and found its way to his hand, adding more lubrication to your wet pussy. Angel’s fingers eagerly used his seed to slip and slide over your clit.
The feeling pushed you into your orgasm, legs shaking as you tried to stay up. “For fuck’s sake,” Val could be heard shouting just past the studio lights.
Drawing him in for another kiss, less deeply now, lips sometimes on lips, and sometimes the chin and the cheek.
You stayed, holding each other, through the shoot. The other actors finishing their parts, cumming and making some puns about bosom buddies. When everyone else left the scene, and you two broke apart your hungry mouths to consider getting cleaned up and dressed, the air grew thick around you. Heads swimming now, a horny haze fell on set.
“Bravo, bitches. You ruined my shoot, only fair I get to ruin something now.” You both turned to see the lights gleaming off Val’s glasses. “Where should I start?”
༻Masterlist༺
My general tag list is called the Horny Little Deer Cult! To be tagged, you are more than welcome to ask to join
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wineauntie · 1 month
Note
I’m in the hospital for a little bit and I’ve just been binging your Hughes!sister imagines! Any way you can do one of her in the hospital and they just don’t know what’s going on? I swear I’ve been poked and prodded for the last couple days wayyyy too much for someone that doesn’t like needles. If not no worries, just wanted you to know I love your writing
WE’VE GOT YOU — hughes brothers x sister!reader
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summary: where one trip to the grocery store ends with you in a hospital bed and three worried brothers
note: once again, I lowkey deviated from this ask, but I low-key live for angsty-fluff <3 I’m so sorry to hear you were/are in hospital and I hope you’re alright lovely!
warnings: use of y/n & y/n/n, medical stuff like insertion of needles, blood, IV’s and hospitals in general, fem!reader, fainting. (I think that’s all really)
word count: 2.6k
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Summer at the lake house was one of your favourite times of the year. It was one of the few times you could spend your days doing nothing besides spending time with your brothers. Your parents were busy for the next three weeks, leaving you completely in the care of your brothers as the four of you flocked to the lake house for some "rest and relaxation".
The four of you were two days into being there when Quinn decided that today was the perfect day to do the weekly, well-needed grocery shop, and he generously volunteered you to help him out.
With nothing better to do, you went willingly.
You'd been feeling off all morning, a sharp pain in your stomach had wracked around your body but in true tested fashion, you popped an Advil and tried to carry on with your day.
"Alright," Quinn huffed, knocking you out of your stupor as the two of you began walking down the grocery store's first aisle. You hummed and pushed the cart forward all whilst he pulled out a list of food to get. "Divide and conquer?"
"I can grab the cereals and snacks, you get the veg and meat?" You suggested, tilting your head to look at your brother who nodded with pursed lips.
"Deal," he confirmed, shaking your outstretched hand. Your warm hand met his cool one as he grimaced and pulled away. "Ugh...Your hand is all clammy."
"Shut up," you rolled your eyes and withdrew your hand. You felt a pang of pain bounce through you as you tightened your existing grip on the shopping cart. "I'll meet you at the registers."
Quinn nodded and the two of you separated, your head tilted to the side as you scanned the shelves for everything you needed. You'd given the shopping list to Quinn, having memorised everything you needed to pick up. As you reached to grab a box of cereal you let out a hiss, the box dropping as your hand shot to clutch your side.
Stars spattered across your vision as you stumbled to grip the cart. The pain in your side was now vicious, biting at your every nerve as your heart sped up. Glancing around, you searched for any sign of your older brother. Your face was fixed in a grimace as you slowly pushed the cart towards where you'd last seen Quinn run off to.
The pain, like daggers, cut through you, aiming for debilitation, you reckoned. The agony grew as you shuffled towards the fruit and veg section, spotting Quinn's blue backward hat from above the wooden shelving. 
"Quinn!" Your desperate call was more of a croak than a yell but, despite the distance and quietness of your voice, he somehow heard you.
His head whipped around, his eyes meeting yours as his eyebrows scrunched together. By this stage, you were leaving heavily against the cart with your face scrunched in pain as black spots danced their way along the borders of your vision. Quinn placed down what he was holding instantly, his eyes steady on your form as you began to tremble.
He knew something was wrong— call it that big brother instinct (or just having proper eyes...but nevertheless).
His eyes remained glued onto your form as you struggled to keep yourself upright. When he finally reached your side, you felt your knees buckle, his arms slipping under yours to keep you upright.
"Fuck," Quinn swore, steadying you as much as he could. His worried eyes spanned across your weak form as you let hot tears roll down the cushioning of your cheeks. "y/n/n, what's happening? What's wrong?"
"Hurts, Q," you let out, your voice shaky and small. If Quinn closed his eyes it was almost as if you were a child again with bruised and cut-up knees looking for him to put a bandaid on it. You put a hand against your side as the pain pulsed and thrummed like a hoard of drummers.
"Okay," Quinn took a deep breath in whilst he shifted in his place. Now wasn't the time for floundering, he needed to take charge. He needed to know what to do–even if he had no idea whatsoever. "I'm going to take you to the hospital, alright? You're going to be okay."
You nodded as he helped guide you out of the shop, ignoring any questioning glances you received as you abandoned the shopping cart and store. He helped you into the passenger seat of the car, reclining it for you before he buckled you in. You drew your legs slowly up onto the chair, curling into yourself as more tears spilt over.
"Just hold tight," Quinn muttered, brushing his hand over your hair before he closed your door and hurried towards his side to start up the car. He gulped as he scanned your small form once more before he drove out of the car park.
The drive felt like a blur, your tears flowing as you tried to focus on anything but the rattling pain. Quinn's voice spoke clearly to you, constantly reassuring you. His familiar voice was one you clung to for any semblance of comfort.
"Hey, Luke, is Jack with you?" Quinn's stern voice spoke and it was only then that you realised he'd called your other brothers, letting it connect to the car's speakers. "Put the phone on loudspeaker..." Quinn looked towards you briefly before readjusting his grip on the steering wheel.
"Y/N isn't doing so well," he continued, "She collapsed on me in the store, so I'm taking her to the hospital."
"Wait, what?"
"What do you mean hospital?"
"Quinn, what's wrong with her?"
Jack and Luke's voices overlapped in a flurry of questions as Quinn sighed and tried to pick through them.
"I think it's her side, she was holding it tightly but I'm not taking any risks," he firmly stated. "We're five minutes out from A&E, I'll keep you posted."
"Keep us posted?!" Jack scoffed, "We'll be there in thirty minutes, maybe twenty-five if I speed a little."
"No speeding!" You groaned, your voice cracking as you pried your eyes open. "Please be careful."
"Alright, y/n/n," Luke piped up, "I'll make sure he's safe...well as safe as he can be, you know how bad he can be at driving."
"I'm not bad," you could imagine Jack scowling as a soft thump resounded. If you knew anything about your brothers you knew Jack had just whacked Luke straight across the head. "We'll see you soon!"
Quinn hummed and hung up as he pulled off of the main road, into the lead up to the hospital. He still looked at you every few seconds, his eyebrows permanently furrowed deep as you carefully squirmed in the leather seats of his car.
"Just hold tight, y/n/n," he muttered, changing gears, "it's going to be alright."
That's the last thing you comprehended before your vision completely darkened.
-
The incessant beeping coming from what you presumed to be a machine was the first thing you heard when you'd woken up. You moved your head groggily, your eyesight blurred as you blinked heavily.
The room was washed in pure you,wokelights above blinding as you lifted your hand to rub at your eyes. You felt a sharp scratch and upon glancing towards the feeling, you eventually noticed the IV jutting out of your paled skin.
You were suddenly wide awake.
You heard the beeping of the machine speed up as you attempted to sit up in the uncomfortable bed you seemed to be lying in. Patting your hands down your body, you discovered a thin hospital gown and a section of bandages across the middle of your stomach.
The door to your left swung open as a woman in scrubs and a white jacket entered with her clipboard in hand. She had a warm smile across her face when she noticed you were awake.
"Hello, I'm Sara, your doctor," the woman's soothing voice explained, as you looked at her in pure bewilderment. "You may feel disoriented for a while, but you’re in one of our recovery rooms at the moment."
"Recovery from what?" Your voice felt chalky if that was even possible. Sara rushed to grab you a glass of water waiting on a table beside you, handing it over to you for you to sip.
"You were brought in around..." Sara paused and checked your chart before looking back at you. "Eight hours ago with severe abdominal pain. You were unconscious, your brother carried you. We ran some tests and discovered that your appendix ruptured."
"My appendix?" You breathed out, your head was swirling as your shaky hands placed the plastic cup of water down on the table.
"Mhm," Sara hummed, stepping closer to the bed with her clipboard. "We took you in for surgery to remove it and now I'm here just to make sure you're awake and alright, before we bring you up to your room!"
"Oh...where is my brother?" You asked quietly, your hands folding cautiously in ront of you.
"The one who brought you in is waiting upstairs, and two other young gentlemen joined him shortly after you arrived."
"Also brothers," you supplied, a small smile weaving its way across your face. You winced as you shuffled beneath the thin sheets of the bed. "When can I see them?"
"As soon as I check you over and grab some bloods!" Sara beamed, waving her clipboard and pen. You leaned back against the pillows and allowed the woman to assess you as you stared at the ceiling.
She pulled out a needle and vial, along with a blue rubber strap. You watched apprehensively as Sara expertly prepared the equipment, her movements precise and practised. Despite your best efforts to remain calm, the sight of the needle made your stomach churn with unease.
"Alright, just a little pinch," Sara reassured you, flashing a reassuring smile as she tied the rubber strap around your arm. With steady hands, she swabbed the crook of your elbow with alcohol before gently inserting the needle into your vein.
You braced yourself for the anticipated sting, but to your surprise, it was only a brief discomfort before the sensation faded. You let out a sigh of relief, grateful that the ordeal was over before you knew it.
Sara expertly filled the vial with your blood, her movements smooth and efficient. Once she had collected an adequate sample, she removed the needle and applied a cotton ball to the small puncture wound.
"All done," she announced cheerfully, placing the vial of blood into a small tray and labelling it with your information. "You did great."
"Thanks...You make it look so easy." You offered her a weak smile, feeling a sense of relief wash over you now that the ordeal was over.
"It comes with the territory." She chuckled softly, gathering up her supplies and tucking them back into her bag. "Now, I'll get these bloods to the lab and then we can get you settled into your room."
With a final wave, Sara left the room, leaving you alone once again. You let out a long exhale, feeling a sense of exhaustion wash over you now that the adrenaline had faded.
-
You took a deep breath in as Sara pressed a button to open the doors to your supposed room. As it opened, you spotted all three of your brothers jump to their feet, their eyes fixed on your incoming bed.
Your eyes met Quinn's, as he seemed to let out a breath and let his shoulders drop. The tension in the room eased as his gaze softened, relief washing over his features like a gentle wave. You could sense the worry etched in his eyes, the weight of concern lifting as he saw you safe and awake.
"Look who finally decided to join the land of the living!" Jack exclaimed with a grin, nudging Luke who was standing next to him.
"Yeah, we were starting to think you'd taken up permanent residence in the land of the appendix-less," Luke chimed in, trying to lighten the mood despite the worry etched on his face in the form of little lines between his brows.
Quinn, ever the one to keep his emotions close to the chest, simply nodded, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Glad to see you're okay," he said softly, his eyes reflecting relief as he ruffled your hair. You couldn't help but chuckle weakly at their attempts at humour, grateful for their presence despite the circumstances.
"Thanks...and Quinn, I guess I owe you one for bringing me here," you quipped, wincing slightly as you shifted in the bed.
"His biceps needed a workout anyways" Luke teased, earning a slight glare from Quinn.
Sara stepped back to give you some space with your brothers, her smile warm and reassuring. "I'll leave you all to catch up. Just remember to take it easy. You're still recovering," she admonished gently before slipping out of the room, leaving the four of you alone.
As you settled back against the pillows, surrounded by the familiar faces of your brothers, you couldn't help but feel a wave of gratitude wash over you. Despite the pain and uncertainty, you knew you were going to be alright as long as you had them by your side.
Luke leaned in, his eyes scanning you with concern. "Seriously though, how are you feeling? You look like you've been through a wrestling match with a grizzly bear." He winced, glancing down at your IV.
"I've been better, I'm just glad it's all over now." You managed a weak smile, appreciating his attempt at levity.
"You scared the hell out of us, you know?" Jack plopped down in the chair next to your bed, his grin faltering slightly as he studied your face. "Typical youngest child behaviour, always the dramatic one."
You scoffed and rolled your eyes as Jack gently laced his fingers through your non-IV hand and squeezed ever so carefully.
"Yeah, I almost had to call in the cavalry to drag your stubborn, passed out self into the ER," Quinn added, a hint of teasing in his voice, though his eyes betrayed his worry.
You chuckled softly, feeling a swell of affection for your brothers. "Well, thanks for not leaving me to suffer." You lolled your head against your pillow as the boys shifted in their stances. The three boys stayed silent as they watched you move with a few groans.
There was a beat of silence before you spoke again.
"So...do you think I can use this whole appendix thing as an excuse to get out of doing chores for, like, the next year?" You asked with a mischievous yet lazy grin, earning a collective groan from the boys.
"You wish, y/n/n," Quinn retorted, rolling his eyes with a chuckle. "But nice try."
As laughter filled the room, you couldn't help but feel a surge of relief wash over you. Despite the pain and uncertainty, having your brothers by your side made everything feel a little bit brighter.
You listened intently as the three explained what had happened exactly from the moment you'd passed out to the very second you'd been brought into the room. Jack and Luke had apparently run over various traffic cones out in the parking lot whilst Quinn had apparently drunk his body weight in caffeine.
As you listened to them, a sudden thought dawned over you.
"Hey...so do Mom and Dad know?"
"Oh, fuck..." Jack grimaced, slapping a hand to his forehead as Quinn swore low under his breath. "We are dead."
638 notes · View notes
disneyprincemuke · 4 months
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oscar's girl * ls2
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logan never thought he would meet the girl that broke oscar’s heart
pairings: logan sargeant x fem!reader
word count: 4.2k
notes: guys ive been writing this since 10pm girl it's mf 4am now please sue me i'm sorry this was a long wind up im sorry but dont worry i will be writing a part two HELL YEAHHHH
(logan's girl) // |(f1 masterlist)
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oscar and logan, logan and oscar. that's how it's been since they had run into each other during a karting weekend in the uk a couple of years ago. oscar had approached him with a toothy grin and a packet of candy after seeing logan walk around by himself for weekends at a time.
maintaining the friendship isn't the easiest of feats: logan lives in south florida, while oscar lives on the opposite side of the globe in melbourne. they don't see each other for very long, and very often in a year. but, it always feels like no time has passed when they get together after months of separation.
but being apart for the majority of the year means the window they've got to keep an ongoing conversation is small. but their string of texts has always come in consistently every day, responses from the other flooding in the early hours of the morning and sometimes in the dead of the night.
that was, until, logan woke up one warm thursday morning to an empty and dry phone. he brushed it off, taking it that oscar just had a long day at school. perhaps too much had happened in the day to simply text at the end of the day. so he went to school as he usually did with his best friend in the back of his mind.
but one day turned into two, and suddenly he hadn't heard from oscar in almost a week.
logan had sent one follow-up text. a simple 'hey' to nudge oscar into a response. which did help, because him and oscar surprisingly texted for a short thirty-minute window before the australian called it quits on their conversation to get some sleep for the next school day.
until oscar goes radio silent again for the next three days. so, he goes to the one other person in oscar's life that he knows personally.
"hey mum," logan starts, walking into the kitchen hesitantly. he's been dancing around the idea of asking his mum for help to see if oscar's even still alive and has not been replaced by some clone that's somehow less chatty than the one he said goodbye to at the airport four months ago.
"yeah, baby?" his mother stands up from her prior hunched-over position at the fridge to smile at him. she opens her arms as he approaches her hesitantly, fiddling with his thumbs. "what's wrong?"
he hums, second-guessing his decision to bring his mother into the situation. perhaps oscar just no longer wants to be friends with him anymore? but if that were the case, oscar definitely would have said something to his face and he's just been quiet. "um, it's just oscar," he starts softly, dropping his gaze to his feet, "can you ask his mum if he's alright?"
"of course," she smiles, letting go of him. she walks around the kitchen counter to find her phone. "why, did something happen to him recently? break another wrist?"
logan shakes his head, pressing his lips together. "no, we haven't been talking as much as we used to. i'm just worried that something might have happened to him."
a blush creeps up his cheeks when his mother's lips pout as she tries to hide her smile. "aw, logan! that's very cute of you. and very thoughtful," she teases as she starts to type on her phone. "i'm texting his mum right now. you hang tight and i'll tell you when she gets up to text me, okay?"
"okay."
he tries not to linger around his mum's circle of personal space for very long, afraid to let on that he's more concerned than he should be for the status of his friendship. to combat the anxiety of potentially losing one of his best friends, he locks himself in his room and plays video games all afternoon.
he had been in the middle of a game in call of duty when his phone started to ring. he glances at from his position on his bed and perks up with oscar's picture taking over the screen of his phone.
he immediately pauses the game, tossing the controller to the side of his bed. he slides his finger across the screen to pick up the call and oscar, visibly tired, pops up on his screen with a small smile.
"hey! my mum just got off the phone with your mum," oscar whispers with a smile. "said you missed me, mate?"
"no, i was just concerned cause you've been off the grid for a while," logan scoffs with an eye roll. "i never said i missed you."
"well, i'm sorry for disappearing on you, mate," oscar drops his gaze and a small smile creeps up on his face. in the dim orange lighting of his bedroom in melbourne, logan can almost make out the redness coming through on oscar's cheeks. "there's a reason for that. it's not because i don't wanna be friends anymore. i've just been a little... preoccupied."
logan tilts his head. he rolls over to his stomach and holds the phone up to his face. "what do you mean? more preoccupied than usual?"
"yeah," oscar giggles. "i uh... i've got-" he clears his throat, the slight embarrassment getting the better of him. he lifts his eyes from his thighs and moves the phone slightly further away. "i got a girlfriend."
logan furrows his eyebrows, throwing his head back slightly in shock. "what?"
"yeah," oscar repeats with a hint of a giggle in his response. "i've been seeing her for a while. do you mind if i tell you about her a little bit?"
"really?" logan smiles, squinting an eye. truthfully, he's finding it a little bit hard to believe that oscar's suddenly got a girlfriend. they're literally always on the phone with one another, texting and updating one another on things that they've got no idea about in their day-to-day lives.
not once has oscar come up to him about a girl before, much less developing a crush on somebody. "this is a bit sudden, isn't it? like, where did this girl come from?"
"she's new," oscar smiles. "so, do you wanna know about her or not?"
"alright, fire away, lover boy."
they talk - no, oscar talks - for the next hour about the girl that's recently enrolled into his private school. all logan can do is giggle and smile with oscar at how their relationship had gone down.
even after oscar has hung up, logan still doesn't really know much about the girl he's spent the better part of the past hour talking about. oscar simply refers to her as 'my girl'.
the next time oscar and logan reunite in the uk is at the end of the year. their mothers made an effort to get flights close to one another, letting them run into each other at the mcdonald's in the airport unknowingly while getting food before heading to the hotel.
"dude!" logan cheers, smacking oscar on the shoulder roughly.
"huh?" the smaller boy ahead of him looks up from his phone, turning his head to be greeted by a familiar pair of green eyes. he immediately locks his phone and slips it into his back pocket as realisation slowly dawns on him. "logan!"
"too busy texting on your phone to even notice i was behind you the entire time," logan scoffs jokingly as a hand comes up to pat him on the shoulder.
oscar presses his lips together as a blush creeps up on his cheeks. "sorry. i was texting my girl!"
"my girl this, my girl that," logan rolls his eyes with a smile. "did she not come along with you?"
"no, mate. she's off for a holiday with her family," oscar shrugs, biting down on his lip.
for the rest of the trip, logan will often catch Oscar cheesing at his phone. it doesn't matter when or where: they could be in their hotel room watching a movie, on the track waiting for the race to start, or while they're having a casual chat before they go to bed.
one question haunts logan for the rest of their stay in the uk: who is this girl?
though, it seems that logan is never destined to meet this girl that his best friend spent an entire year gushing about. because at three in the morning on a random saturday in may, his phone buzzes with oscar's picture taking over his entire screen again.
"we broke up."
logan would stay up all morning with oscar that day, letting oscar choke back on tears for the next thirty minutes about the girl that simply packed her bags and moved halfway across the world from him. they would never speak of this day again, even after they both relocated to the uk together to start their junior career.
oscar never speaks of the girl he once devoted his entire self to, but logan often finds himself thinking of her whereabouts and how their relationship had changed oscar.
oscar never uttered the phrase ‘my girl’ when he started dating his long-time girlfriend, lily zneimer. now that they’re in f1 together, logan has at least gotten to know this girlfriend.
he is very well aware that she exists: he’s talked to and touched lily. but the question still lingers in the back of his mind about the unnamed girl, even years later.
the thought of her pops up randomly in his mind as he approaches the paddocks for his sophomore year in the sport. that was prompted by the sight of oscar also making his way into the paddocks slightly ahead of him.
“mate, i heard you’ve got a special guest in your side of the garage today,” oscar teases, stepping away from logan as he reaches out to tap his card into the reader.
“what? who told you that?” logan scoffs, passing through the gantries as he throws his head back in disbelief. “ugh, alex needs to shut his trap. i bet he told lando then lando told you.”
“no, your mum told my mum,” oscar laughs. he nudges his friend with his shoulder. “why? are you shy?”
“piss off.” logan giggles as he drops his head, shaking his head as he bites back a smile. “i’ll see you later, mate.”
“oh, i’ll see you later alright. i’ve got to see who’s making you blush like that,” the australian giggles, shoving him in the direction of the williams racing home.
logan chases his shoulder, managing to land a soft smack before he completely walks away. sure, logan had been seeing somebody for a while, and this weekend was the one he had singled out for you to come out and watch his race.
you were scheduled to come in about thirty minutes for now, about twenty minutes before he is supposed to disappear from the garage for an interview panel.
and he’s excited. this is his first time having his personal guest, who isn’t his mother or brother, in his side of the garage. sure, getting halfsies of alex’s girlfriend from the garage next to him is still something, but it’s just not the same.
so, he tries to pass the next thirty minutes as well as he can. and he does everything: he terrorises his team in the garage, then james sitting his office, then alex in his driver’s room.
still ten minutes left on the clock.
kinda early, but i’m here! :)
logan almost jumps out of his skin at the notification that pops up along with your name. he swallows back the excited scream as he runs down the stairs, pushing himself past alex and his girlfriend who were gathered downstairs with james.
logan swings the glass doors open, slumping his shoulders and feeling a wave of happiness in his chest when he sees you standing shyly by the stairs.
you look very cozy: wrapped in a dark puffer jacket and your bag barely hanging onto your shoulder. he almost wants to disappear with you into his driver’s room and cuddle all day. to hell with his commitments, even if it means fighting off his pr officer.
“hey, you!” logan beams, perking up as he jogs down the few steps to where you were. “you should have texted me when you reached the paddocks. i could have picked you up.”
immediately, he bends down to take your bag into his hands and then he pulls you in for a warm hug. “thanks for making it out this weekend.”
“of course. how can i decline a chance to watch you in your element?” you smile, leaning back slightly and wrapping your arms around him. “thank you for reserving a pass for me.”
“absolutely!” logan cheers, pulling away. “let me bring you inside and introduce you to the team. you don’t mind, right?”
“it’s my pleasure,” you smile.
he puts a hand on your back as he guides you up the racing home, pushing the door open and beckons for you to walk in before him.
“ah, lily, you were right! it’s neither his brother nor his mum that’s making a special appearance this weekend!” alex booms from deep inside the hospitality, throwing his arms in the air. “mr american man got a girlfriend over the winter break?”
“shut up, mate,” logan scowls, moving his hand up to hold your shoulder protecticely. “but, yes. this is… my girlfriend.”
he shyly looks down at you, catching your eye as you glance up at him. you’ve only recently gotten into a relationship with logan; fresh, only six weeks into the title.
“oh, it’s so nice to meet you,” lily steps away from alex’s grasp and holds a hand out to you, “i’m lily. welcome to the paddocks.”
“hi, i’m (y/n). it's so nice to finally meet you,” you smile, taking her hand. “and alex! logan talks about you guys really often. i’m a big fan.”
“oh, logan talks about me,” alex teases in a laugh, also extending his hand out to you. “good things only, i hope.”
“hey, i told you not to tell him that,” logan says through his teeth, giving you a warning stare with wide eyes.
“it’s my first time meeting him, babe,” you laugh to logan, taking his hand in yours to shake.
"oh, can i tell you about logan's antics last year in the paddocks?" alex asks you excitedly, hopping one step toward you.
"or," lily laughs, wrapping her arms around her boyfriend to steer him away from you, "let's let her settle down with logan. you can terrorise her after the day has ended, alex."
"aw, but i've got lists of embarrassing things about him," alex sighs with a frown, though he lets lily guide him away from the new couple. he cranes his neck and grins at you. "i will see you later! i'll prepare a list!"
"so we're avoiding him later," logan smiles at you, now guiding you towards the steps that would lead you to some privacy. "have you run into anyone yet? have you seen liam yet?"
you shake your head. "not yet. but i hope you'll bring me to him so that i can get to say hi? i haven't seen him since we bumped into them at disneyland in december."
"yeah, i know. he's been asking about you." he opens the door to his driver's room to let you in. "so, i've got to run for a bit. i've got an interview panel. it really shouldn't take too long. i'm sorry."
"sorry? what are you sorry for?" you giggle, taking a seat in the corner of the room. your eyes scan the small room, taking note of the endless shirts riddled with williams' logo hung in the corner.
"i don't wanna just leave you here by yourself," logan slumps his shoulders with a frown, resting his hands on his knees as he bends over to meet your eyes. "i feel bad."
"oh, i'll be okay." you wave off his concern and lean in, pressing a chase kiss to his lips. "just text me when you're done. i'll go downstairs and find lily and get to know her better."
"that's a good idea! you guys should really go around the paddocks. there's a concert somewhere too, make the best out of my pass, okay?" logan smiles, his hand cupping your chin. he brushes his thumb over your cheek as he towers over you. "text me if you get lost."
"i won't get lost," you smile, standing up from the seat. "i actually haven't had my coffee yet. do you know anywhere i can get a cup of coffee?"
"oh, lily should know where," logan hums, tapping his bottom lip as he heads for his door. "let me get her for you."
"logan." the firmness in your voice stops logan in his tracks, turning around with curious eyes. "i can find lily on my own. i'll be okay - i'll see you later."
"are you sure? i just feel bad that i'll leave you all by yourself," logan whispers, leaning in to kiss your cheek. "i'll miss you."
"i'll miss you too. but you've got a job to do," you giggle, walking out of his room with your hands wrapped around his arm. "i won't disappear. i'll meet you wherever when you're done. just text me."
"fine."
so logan goes and does his media commitments with alex in tow. and lily clearly had the same idea as you, meeting you at the front doors as alex walked away with logan.
"logan mentioned you were looking for coffee?" lily beams, quickly finding herself by your side as she leads you around the paddocks. "i know the best racing home to get a good cup of, but we might have to sneak in."
"sneak in?" you tilt your head. "is that even allowed?"
"yeah, carmen will get us in! mercedes has got the best cup of coffee to offer around here," lily giggles. "and, you should meet the rest of the girls. what are you going to do for the rest of the evening while the boys are out doing their jobs?"
"i suppose you're right," you shrug with a small smile. "but it's my first time here. should i really be caught sneaking into another team's home?"
"ah, you're with me," lily smiles. "i've got you."
so you actually get your cup of coffee in the back of the mercedes' racing home, now finding yourself huddled together with carmen and lily. they had asked you how you had come to meet logan, especially after the driver had spent most of it behind closed doors and rarely showed himself to the cameras.
it was a pretty simple story. you had been on vacation in new york with a group of your friends, minding your business in the corner of a crowded bar. truthfully, you didn't even want to be there, but it was your best friend's birthday trip. you couldn't say no even if you insisted.
logan had caught sight of you pretending to drink shots your friends were handing you towards the end of the night. eventually, you wound up with about six filled shot glasses hiding behind you, desperately hidden from your friend's prying eyes.
he thought it was funny, and had offered to finish them for you. in exchange for a promise that they were not laced with poison.
you had hit it off, and logan asked you out on a date. while you were unfortunately flying off to another state in a week, he had taken up the challenge and took you out on a date the very next night in the heart of new york city.
the rest is history, as they say.
"does logan actually ever say no to free alcohol?" carmen jokes, blowing into her cup of hot coffee. "wait! there's a concert happening not too far from here. do you guys know who's performing?"
"it should be on the race's instagram page," lily sighs, swiftly taking her phone out of her pocket. "but aren't the guys finishing up their interviews by now?"
"it's a long weekend. would they really notice if we weren't here for one break that they have?" carmen points out knowingly with a smile. "and we've got to show her," carmen gestures towards you, "around. is this your first race weekend?"
you nod shyly, taking a sip from your coffee. "but it's okay, really! don't go out of the way for me."
"that's silly." lily runs a hand through her hair and sighs, resting a hand on her hip. "okay, so, let's meet the guys near the pit building. when they're called in for their driver's briefing, we make a run for the concert area, okay?"
"that sounds like a much better compromise." carmen turns to you with a playful smile. "we will teach you how to make the most out of logan's race pass. you're going to have so much fun with us."
"after the concert, we'll head upstairs to the viewing pen and get a couple of drinks," lily smiles. she glances down at her phone. "oh, seems like they're already done. you guys wanna head there together?"
"sure!"
you start backpedalling from your position, ready to follow the two veteran paddock enjoyers. that seemed like a good idea until your back collides with something - someone - and suddenly you've got mildly hot coffee all over your top.
this is the one time you regret unzipping your jacket to let a bit of the cold in.
"i'm so sorry."
"it's fine," you say with a soft whine, turning around before being flashed by a bright orange jacket and a pair of brown eyes. "it's..." you tilt your head. "do i know you from somewhere?"
the shape of his polite smile and the way his brown eyes look into you are all very familiar. but you just can't quite place a finger on it.
perhaps it's because he looks a lot different from the last time you saw him. you were a wee fourteen-year-old the last time you had seen him before you were forced to pack your bags and move away because of your dad's job.
but, as a kid, you generally did a lot of moving around because of that said job. now you're just trying to single him out by geographic location from the many friends you've made and lost contact with over the years.
"(y/n)?" oscar's eyebrows shoot up, your name coated thickly with an australian accent as his hand lingers on your shoulder.
"oh, you two know each other?" lily excitedly asks, looking between the two younger individuals.
who seem to be very caught up in their unexpected reunion. you'd be shocked too if the girl you had thought was the love of your life shows up at your big boy job with your colleagues' girlfriends with a mercerdes coffee cup in hand.
"yeah, we uh," oscar takes a step away from you and puts his hands in the pockets of his team jacket, "we used to go to school together. in melbourne."
"right," you sigh in relief, finally being able to place him in a particular timeline of your life. you finally remember him: oscar piastri, the school heartthrob with a charming smile and friendly eyes. he had even asked you to be his girlfriend at some point, dating for the better part of a year before you had to leave melbourne with your family. "oscar, right? i'm sorry, my memory's a little bit hazy."
"no, yeah," oscar agrees, scanning you head to toe. "it's been... how long has it been since we last saw each other?"
"very long. it's been years since i left melbourne." you lower your cup and readjust your jacket, trying to hide the prominent wet patch of coffee at the collar of your inner shirt.
but the longer you stare at him, the more the memories come rushing back to the time you spent with the best friend you had made in melbourne for those years. you can vividly remember oscar picking you out in pe to be his teammate, sneaking out of homeroom to grab a juice pack together right down the hall.
you had completely forgotten the tears you shed that day you had to leave melbourne. you swore that you would keep in contact with the warmest brown eyes your eyes have ever seen, but you had simply gotten too busy settling into the new environment that had been thrown at you.
before you knew it, you had dropped your phone into the lake when you were out with your friends and you lost oscar's phone number. you never found a way to reconnect with him, and eventually, he had joined the long list of friends that you had forgotten about.
"i," oscar laughs, "what are you doing here in the paddocks? are you friends with them?"
"no," you straighten your back with a polite smile, "i'm with somebody - logan."
and oscar's never wanted to ever tear apart the paddocks' walls with his own hands before. what do you mean his girl is here with his best friend?
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Cold as ice
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a/n I honestly hope you all will cry the way I cried writing this because now I genuinely need four to five business days to recover. Because never have I actually needed to take a minute to sob in the middle of writing.
summary: what happens when Ellie stumbles upon a memorial that turns out to have both your and Joel's kids names on it. When the past pain is brought back to the daylight even the coldest of hearts finally break.
warning: pain and suffering first and foremost, tissues ain't included. Blood, wounds, shooting, killing, multiple death, loosing your kids.
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Ellie had slipped out of the shower. She hated being separated from you and Joel. So the fact that you walked away from her, leaving her with Maria, didn't sit well with her whatsoever. You had hugged her tightly before leaving, promising to be back as soon as possible and that you three would eat dinner together as you always did.
She had gotten extremely close to you. Yet there was something in Joel's eyes when he watched you hug Ellie that told her that there was more than you two let her know. She was aware that you two had been together long before the outbreak; she assumed you were married from the bent ring that was on your finger. But besides that, she knew nothing. Well, that you could handle Joel's shit the best of anyone Ellie had met.
She had seen and heard Joel mumbling in his sleep. Watched you rub his back with a sad expression on your face. And the same went for you, just when your nightmare hit - they hit you hard. Ellie had been woken up by your screams in the middle of the night. Joel's calm voice tries to make you calm down. She had only once turned to look at all of this unfolding; most of the time she just pretended that she was fast asleep. "Don't let them, Joel", you cried, "Don't", "I'm so sorry", Joel would sway you from side to side. His own eyes glossed over with tears. "Should have let me die instead. I should have died," you choked out, clenching the shirt Joel was wearing. His face looked stone cold as you clawed at him, sobbing.
Ellie never brought those nights up. If she teased Joel for speaking in his sleep, she had never said anything about your nightmares out loud. After nights like that, she would shimmy closer to you. Making sure she would be holding onto your hand more often or just hugging you every moment she could. Ellie couldn't help the feeling inside her that told her that you needed her.
Ellie hurried down the stairs, zipping the pink jacket she despised solely because of its outrageously girly color. Maria had left the note that she was just across the street, and as much as Ellie enjoyed being alone. She needed to kill time before you two came back. Plus, being away from you made her rather uneasy. She knocked on the door a couple of times. Yet no one answered. After more failed attempts, Ellie just let herself in. "Maria," she called out, stepping into the hallway. The house looked nice and was well lived in. Ellie had never seen anything like it. Even the smell seemed homely. She stepped into the living room, where the fire was crackling in the fireplace. Her eyes fell onto the three names written down with white chalk, surrounded by candles. Kevin, Sarah, and Malakai. Ellie couldn't help but frown.
"Ah, good, here you are. Try it on," Maria said, making Ellie jump as she turned away from the bored and took the coat from her hands. "Well, it's super fucking purple," "Eggplant, fits well?", Maria questioned, and Ellie nodded her head. "Who's been cutting your hair?", Ellie gave the woman a crooked look. "Am… world-class salons," she sassed back, making Maria let out somewhat of a chuckle. "I'll go get my sizers," Ellie argued immediately, but Maria stood firm, "Just the ends I promised."
The sound itself made Ellie cringe as she held onto the side of the chair for dear life. She hated this. Hated getting her hair cut. "I saw you looking at the memorial Tommy made", Ellie swallowed hard once Maria spoke up once again. She hoped this wouldn't be brought up, but then again, she was snooping. "I'm sorry about your kids," Ellie choked out, thankful that she didn't have to look her in the eye. Maria's movements stopped. "It's okay and kid. Just Kevin. Sarah and Malakai were Joel's and Y/N's kids", and a cold shiver ran down Ellie's back. Kids. You two had kids and lost both of them. "I'm sorry, shouldn't have said anything", "It's okay, it… It explains Joel's behavior and why Y/N…", but her voice died down. Maria didn't need to know about your nightmares.
"Look, I won't ask you what you are doing with them, especially Joel…" "Good," Ellie bit back. "You need to understand my concerns", Maria walked right in front of her, but Ellie only glared her way, "Be concerned about your husband, who did the same shit, if not worse". Maria let out a surprised sigh, "You have one hell of a mouth," and Ellie quickly stood up, shrugging off the towel that was over her shoulders, "And you are one hell of a sister-in-law if all you can do is throw shit at Joel." The adrenaline rushed through Ellie the moment the words slipped past her lips. She didn't regret them, but at the same time, she knew she shouldn't have. It was, however, too late. So she quickly stormed out of the house.
Her breathing picked up as she ran. Quickly slamming the doors behind herself. "Ellie?", your voice rang through the place, and she almost sank to the floor with relief. Like a lost animal, she darted towards the kitchen, meeting you midway as you stepped out into the hallway. Throwing her arms around your torso as she pressed herself closer to you. You couldn't help but frown as your hands ran through her hair. Confused as to what had happened, "Love, you are worrying me. What's going on?" You tried to loosen Ellie's grip on you, but she just clenched your shirt tighter.
Ellie almost felt like she suddenly couldn't face you. She shouldn't have found out like that. So she quickly stepped back and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. The worry inside you grew even more as you watched her. "Sweet girl, should I go get Joel?", you asked, but Ellie quickly shook her head, only now realizing that this involved him as much as it involved you. "Okay, well, you know you can tell me anything. I can't help if I don't know what happened," you said, softly reaching for Ellie's hand. Just this didn't feel like anything. This felt like the biggest thing ever.
"I'm sorry," Ellie rasped out, "I wasn't… I didn't want to… but they had a memorial," Ellie cried out, and suddenly it all started to make sense. You moved to wrap her up in your arms once again, "No one is blaming you; you were bound to find out eventually." You ran your hands through Ellie's hair once again. With a sigh, you clenched the necklace that hung over your chest. "You want to know the story of me and Joel?", you asked, making Ellie look up at you with mixed emotions. You nodded your head, "Well, let's make tea and sit down somewhere more comfortable." You knew that this was going to be one painful set of memories to unlock. But she deserved it. She was part of the family now.
And what a journey it had been. You met Joel in a supermarket. Where he was frantically looking for baby formula. The baby he was supporting with one hand screamed bloody murder. "Hello," you said cautiously, not wanting to startle him any further. His helpless, tired eyes snapped your way. You could tell that he most definitely hadn't slept in more than a couple of days. If not his eyes telling you that, then his overgrown and unkempt beard did. This male was a mess. "Do you mind if I", you pointed to the bundled-up baby, "You're in distress, and they feel it. Babies are sensitive to emotions", Joel's shoulders sagged; it looked like your words had finally defeated him.
"Just stand here. If you even think about doing something to hurt her…," you looked at him with a knowing smile. Trusting your blood and soul with a stranger was no joke. Especially being a newly baked parent. Plus, fathers were already way more protective. Especially of their girls. You pressed your hand to the heart, "I'll stand right here, just want to help". Joel nodded his head. Dropping down the box of formula he was holding as he moved towards you, lowering the bundle into your hands.
Even with her face all red and screaming her little lungs out, she was so pretty. You gently rocked her in your arms, "It's okay, gorgeous girl. Why are you crying, love bug?", you cooed at her. Fingers carefully ran down her cheek as you wiped away her big tears. "Shhh, sweet girl, you've got your daddy all worried. We don't want that, do we?" The cries slowly died down, and her big, still-damp eyes stared right at you.
Joel felt like someone had sent this as a cruel joke. His wife, the mother of his child, should be doing this, not some stranger in the middle of the supermarket. "Grab the mixture on the second shelf, more to your right", your voice made Joel snap his head in your direction once again. "I assumed you were looking for a formula. So that one should do her good. Won't upset her stomach if she's also breastfed", Joel clenched his jaw at your words. No, Sarah was not. Her mother had vanished. She didn't even know what a mother was or what it would feel like to have one.
You sensed the tension. Slowly stepping closer to the male, one hand resting on his shoulder. "Don't take this as an insult because I'm sure you are an amazing father. But do you want me to pop by and help out while you rest a little?" You had an odd feeling that the mother wasn't in the picture. That he was all alone. And the baby wasn't older than a month or a bit more. If this man was juggling that alone. Well, that must have been hard.
You hummed to yourself as you fixed up a light dinner from whatever you managed to find in Joel's fridge. Considering the empty cardboard boxes all over the place, it's been a hot minute since he had a proper meal himself. Once he drove you back to his, you quickly ushered him upstairs. Telling him to take a bath and catch some sleep. You knew that he would have fought you on it. If only he wasn't running on the last bits of energy. And you weren't snooping, but while you were cleaning up the kitchen, you found an open letter. A letter you assumed was from Joel's wife. She had left them two without anything, not even a proper explanation. You knew it wasn't your place to judge; motherhood was tough. Not all women were built to be mothers. You had written down instructions for Joel. How do fix a bottle. What different formulas do get, and how to switch them up if Sarah got an upset stomach per se. You wanted him to know that he wasn't alone. Even if you two had known each other for less than a day.
Joel stepped down the stairs hours later. Beard trimmed, eyes less puffy. He found you on the sofa reading a book to Sarah. One of her tiny fists was wrapped around your finger as your soft voice filled the room, "Why are you smiling? Am I that funny?", you cooed at her, making Sarah let out a happy grumble, "Ah, we even lost the pacifier with all the smiling, huh," you pinched her cheek carefully.
Joel was lost for words, to say the least. This was how he saw his family. This was what he hoped he would come down to with his wife. A sob that had held up for weeks, now finally escaped his lips, making you turn his way in an instant. You carefully set Sarah down before approaching him. Opening up your arms in case he needed a hug but keeping a distance in case this was overstepping his boundaries. Yet Joel did fall into your arms. He mumbled out all of his worries and questions that had been bothering him. He had no clue what he was doing. How nothing made sense to him now.
That night, and the many that followed, completely transformed you two. You had practically moved into the Millers' house. You lived not that far away, but the apartment was small, and since the job, you had only managed to cover the rent costs; you were barely getting by as it was. Joel needed someone to look after Sarah while he worked, so having you in the house solved that issue for him. But with each passing week and more, you three fell into somewhat of a routine, and you couldn't help but notice how right this all felt. You always wanted to be a young mom anyway. Sure, the baby wasn't yours, but that meant nothing to you. You cherished Sarah as if she was your blood and flesh. Joel loved that Sarah would grow up having you in her life. A true mother figure and did not doubt that as soon as his daughter learned how to talk, she would without a doubt refer to you as a mother.
Now, almost 12 years later, you still found yourself smiling every time you thought back at the time you and Joel came together, clawing through the struggles as one. "Morning", Sarah ran down the stairs, quickly coming to kiss your cheek as she moved to grab plates for everyone. "Morning, darling, is your father awake?", "Banged on the door loudly, but he's getting old wouldn't be surprised if he didn't hear", you let out a chuckle at her words. She often teased Joel about getting old. Especially now that his first gray hair had sprouted.
"Is Momo up?", Sarah asked, missing the sight of her brother in the kitchen. You turned to the living room, "Tommy is watching cartoons with him." Malakai was a surprise baby, to say the least. You and Joel weren't trying to get pregnant, but at the same time, you weren't always all that safe when it came to sex. When you feel pregnant, you generally couldn't help but have the fear of Joel walking out on you. Yes, you two had gotten engaged not that long ago, but the conversation of having kids together was never a thing.
Yet Joel didn't do anything but cry once you told him. He wrapped you up in his arms as you two swayed in the kitchen at two in the morning, where you had waited for him to return from his shift. "Tell me again; I still can't believe it," he muttered into your ear for what felt like a thousand times, "I am pregnant with your baby." Joel shook his head still, "Baby Miller..", he let out a breathy laugh. Hands coming to hold his head. With you? A baby with you? The most amazing woman on this earth. He surely didn't deserve it, but he was more than grateful for it.
"I know we might get tight on money. I do want to work till I get too big..", you blurred out, letting your biggest worries out. Joel quickly cupped your face, "Don't you worry your cute head about that. I will take more shifts, and we will be fine", yet you still frowned at him. You didn't want him to work any more than he already did. It felt wrong to let him carry the income burden on his own. "I can still work", "I will only agree to that if you are feeling one thousand percent sure that you can do that. I would much more prefer you stayed at home." You did figure it all out, as you always did. Sarah was over the moon to get a sibling, and now more than ever, this felt like a family.
Joel hurried down the stairs just as Sarah came back with Malakai in her arms. Your husband quickly leaned in to kiss you as he grabbed a cup of coffee. "Birth-a", Malakai clapped. Sarah leaned in to whisper something into his ear once again. "Daddy Old," he said happily, making you let out a laugh, especially when that proud smirk painted Sarah's face. Joel shook his head, "I'll send Cooky Monster after you two. Come here and hug me, you crazy bunch." Watching your kids wrapped up in Joel's strong arms always made you feel some type of way. He was the best father a child could ask for.
"No pancakes?", Sarah grumbled as she looked at the scrambled eggs in front of her, "Frown at your father, he forgot to buy it". It was a tradition to have pancakes on birthday mornings. One that all four of you took very seriously. But with the job load only getting bigger, you couldn't blame Joel for forgetting to get it. "Will we at least get the cake?", "I'll buy one on my way home, I promise," Joel said, scuffing down the egg. Sleeping in meant more rushing, especially when he still needed to drop Sarah off at school.
"Good cause it would be a shit birthday if we didn't at least get that", she said in frustration, "Language young lady", you nudged her shoulder. "Your shirt is insane out, handsome", you pointed your fork Joel's way as he dropped the empty plate in the sink. "No, it is not," he argued, looking down, "Dad, you are seriously getting old," Joel grumbled while taking off his shirt. You moved to feed Malikai, trying to hide your smile.
"You and I, tonight after the kids are asleep. I have special plans with you", Joel cupped your face, leaning in to kiss you a couple of times. "Gross!", Sarah shouted from the hallway, making you two laugh. "Don't make promises you can't keep, Miller", you packed his lips one more time. God, was letting go of this man hard. "I know what I am still capable of," Joel teased back, making you raise your eyebrows, " I'll be the judge of that tonight, sir."
You three had already eaten dinner. Malakai had been sleeping on your chest for quite some time. Sarah dozed off slightly as you waited for Joel to come home. He was late. That, of course, upset Sarah. You wished it was different. That she would see more of him. You hoped that now that you had landed a pretty good job deal, you could balance it out. That Joel could be home more often, and the kids wouldn't have to miss him that much.
The sound of the keys jingling made you stir as you noticed Joel walking into the living room. He was tired, as always. Sarah stirred from beside you. "You're so late," she mumbled, leaning more into you as you ran a hand through her hair. "I know, baby girl; I'm so sorry." Joel kneeled in front of her, carefully tickling her side in hopes to make the grumpy go away. "Did you at least get the cake?", Joel cursed under his breath. All the way home, he knew he had forgotten something, but it only hit him now. "Are you for real, dad?", "I promise I'll get the biggest cake I can get for you all tomorrow."
Sarah looked up at him, letting out a sigh as she reached to wrap her hands around her father's neck. Joel pressed her close to his chest, holding her just a tad harder than most evenings. "I got you something but it's upstairs", she said rubbing her sleepy eyes. Once she had disappeared from the room, you turned to Joel. "I'm so sorry for messing it up," he muttered, sitting down next to you. "Jokes on you, you messed your birthday up." You leaned closer to him. Malakai grumbled in his sleep, his eyes opening for a moment. The sight of his father finally being home made him reach for Joel. He instantly scooped the boy up, pressing a loving kiss to the top of his curly hair as he rocked him a couple of times. Malakai eased into sleep immediately. And you weren't too surprised about it—the warmth Joel carried was enough to make anyone fall asleep within seconds.
"Open up," Sarah said as she handed Joel a box. He shook it a couple of times, trying to inspect it without seeing it. "I know it was laying in your drawer for some time now", "Where did you get the money for it?", Joel looked at the old watch that he had to give up on years ago. "Drugs," Sarah said casually, making you let out a laugh that Joel joined soon after. "I think you got mugged, though it's not ticking." Joel pushed the watch to his ear, and Sarah's face paled as she moved to grab it out of her father's hands. The sound of ticking filled her ears, making her roll her eyes and say, "Not funny, dad."
You moved to wrap your arms around her, dragging her onto the bed with you. She would be sandwiched between you and Joel. "How about a movie, and then I'll tuck my two gremlins into bed", Sarah playfully hit Joel's chest, "Mom, will fall asleep within minutes", she turned to watch you already almost dozing off. "I won't say I won't, but I'm giving you ten minutes, and you will be out as well", you hugged her closer, eyes falling onto Joel who looked down on you two fondly.
"If I knew what was going to happen that night… I would", your voice died down, "I don't even know what I would have changed, but I wish I could go back, you know? To try to do something differently", Ellie looked at you. If you had let yourself smile a little at the thought of the happy memories she knew that now was the time when the real shit was going to go down. Ellie inched closer to you. Leaving her cup on the table as she took a hold of your hand once again.
"I have four civilians by the river," the male said sharply into the radio. "Joel," you whispered, pressing Momo closer to your chest as your breathing picked up. Joel wished he could reach for you and hold you close as well, but he knew that now that was impossible. "We'll be okay, love. All of us will be okay," Joel whispered, his eyes not leaving the soldier in front of him. "Uncle Tommy," Sarah whispered, looking between you and Joel. "We'll get you two and mommy somewhere safe, and I'll go back to look for him," Joel said as calmly as he could, pressing Sarah even closer to him.
The soldier lifted the gun, making you shake your head. "We're not sick", Joel managed to say before the shots rang out. Everything that happened after that was a blur and a slow-motion movie at the same time. The fall off the curb. The cries from Malakai rang out even louder than the bullets. You fell right beside Joel, your hands clinging to the boy and pressing him closer to you. The light from the gun made you close your eyes once again. "I'm sorry", you heard the soldier rasp out, "No, please", Joel exhaled, moving as quickly as he could to shield your body with his own as yet another shot fired. Joel's hand pressed down onto you tightly, not even letting go when the sound around him died down.
"Oh god", Tommy's voice made Joel lift his head, turning his attention to where his younger brother was looking. And there was Sarah. Her breaths were shallow as she pressed down on her side, which was bleeding heavily. Joel felt as if his world stopped for a moment as he crowed towards her. "No… no," Joel breathed out, "You're okay, baby girl, you're okay." His eyes fell on the wound that was pouring out bright red blood. "Sarah", you called out, inching towards her, gasp leaving your mouth as you saw just how bad it was. Joel tried to move her up, but Sarah only screamed out in pain, "I know, baby, I know. I need to help you up."
Joel's eyes were on you as you sobbed by Sarah's side. Hands were now just as soaked as his with sticky blood. Joel looked at Tommy, who was holding Malakai, then back to Sarah, who was gulping down air. He couldn't let his baby die. Not here. Not now. Not his little girl. Not his butterfly. Joel pressed his palms to the shot wound harder, making Sarah roar in agony, "I know it hurts, but you will be okay". You brushed your hand over the side of her face, not trusting your words anymore.
"Tommy, help me!", Joel shouted, but once he turned his attention back to his brother, his breathing stopped. Your eyes followed Joel's gaze. Eyes grew wide at the sight of Tommy standing there with a gun pointed at his head. Malakai being dragged away by another soldier. You quickly rose to your feet. "Give me my boy!", you shouted. No longer sounding like yourself. More like a wild animal out for blood.
"That's a child. Are you going to kill a child?", you stepped closer, but only got met with the back of the gun hitting your back, making you fall back to the ground. "Please, please, I'll do anything," you croaked out, pulling yourself up as you watched the soldier stop in its tracks. The boy in his arms reached out to you as he cried. The soldier let go of Malakai, and for a split second, a rush of hope flowed through you. He was going to come back to you. Your baby boy was going to be okay.
You reached your hands towards him as he took wobbly steps towards you. "Come here, baby, come here, Momo," you called out, barely being able to see through the tears streaming down your cheeks. "Mama," he cried out, making you nod your head. And then the shot rang out. The sound that you knew was going to hunt you for the rest of your life. You saw the bullet pierce Malakai's head as his body sagged to the floor.
The scream that fell from you was far from human. The pain that pierced you was as outrageous. You quickly moved forward, ready to kill the man who had just killed both of your kids cold-heartedly. You didn't make it far as two hands quickly pulled you over to the side. Turning you away from the lifeless body of the toddler.
Joel knew he had to get to you before you joined the kids on the ground. He held onto you for dear life as you trashed in his hands, "I will fucking kill you, do you hear me? I will rip you to pieces, you fuck," you screamed, trying to get loose and out of Joel's embrace. "Let go of me, let me kill him," you spat, nails digging into Joel's arms as you tried to push them away. "I've got you; you need to breathe." His words made you stop. You looked him in the eyes for the first time that night. Another sob escaped your lips as you sank to the floor, hands ripping at the skin of your chest, "Kill me, let me die, I don't want to live", your words were broken in between harsh intakes of breath. Joel shook his head once again, wrapping his arms around you, "I need you, please, I need you".
The sound of the door closing made you jump. You had no clue when you finished telling the story. You don't remember zoning out. Ellie was still holding your hands, her own eyes puffy from crying. Joel stopped in his tracks. The sight of him was not something he imagined coming home to. Your face was pale. Streaks of tears are still visible on your cheeks. Ellie didn't look any better. "What happened?", Joel quickly closed the distance between you. "Did someone hurt you? Are you hurt?", he took a hold of your trembling hand before turning to Ellie. "I…", she started, but the world failed her. The panic inside Joel only grew.
"Ellie found out about Sarah and Momo," you whispered, closing your eyes in hopes to stop the tears from falling once again. To the sound of the names, Joel's jaw clenched as he sat down on the table that was behind him. "I'm so sorry. I just saw the memorial." Joel only shook his head. "I swear I didn't", "Ellie," Joel said firmly, making her stop.
He knew this day would come. He might be half deaf, but he wasn't blind. Joel knew that Ellie was up most nights when you would scream. And was quite surprised that she hadn't yet brought this up in any way. But then again, she wasn't a stupid girl; she knew her boundaries. You rose to your feet, and Joel was quick to steady you, yet you brushed his touch away. "I need some fresh air", "I'll come with you", Joel insisted, but you shook your head, "I want to be alone for a moment". He was going to fight that choice, but by now he had grown to understand that in moments like this, letting yourself feel it out alone, at least at the beginning, was the best option.
Ellie couldn't bring herself to look at Joel as she fidgeted with her fingers, "I didn't mean to…", "I thought I was going to lose her after it all", Joel's words took Ellie by surprise. She quickly turned her gaze toward him. Joel was staring blankly at the wall in front of him. "She did everything she could to die. I didn't sleep; I couldn't. Was too afraid that I would miss something, won't be able to stop her", he exhaled sharply, hands coming over his face for a second.
"You had the biggest impact on Y/N. I saw her smiling for the first time in twenty years when you came by", Joel shook his head. Ellie couldn't utter a single word as he continued to stare at him. "I never meant to hurt you," "You never did. I feel the safest with you. I love you both as my parents. You have been the closest thing to a family that I've ever had," Ellie blurted out quickly. Joel turned to her, his eyes glistening with tears. "I won't let anyone hurt you," Joel whispered, clenching his jaw. Ellie fell into his arms, wrapping herself around his torso. "I know because you've never let anyone down, and you're not about to start doing that now."
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chaethewriter · 1 year
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You're dead to me [8]
dad!Jake Sully x human!daughter!reader
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In which Jake Sully leaves his life on earth to settle down with the Omatikaya people as Toruk Makto. Having a family that consists of four kids with Neytiri, everything seems to work out just fine, but what if the past comes back for him? And his babygirl is right there in front of him?
warning: english isn't my first language, heavy angst, fluff, I'm sorry if this sucks, barely proofread.
Word count: 7k
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"She's beautiful.." Jake held you in his arms as he gazed at your sleeping face. You were born just an hour ago. The birth was hard, but he knew your mom was strong. She would make it. Jake Sully was sitting in an empty hospital room with you in his arms as nurses walked in and out to check up on you. You were breathing and healthy, the news making him exhale in relief. He was wondering why you were separated from your mom for so long though, shouldn't you be in her arms instead of his? He knew your mother had a hard time during her labor, but this shouldn't take too long right? You opened your mouth as you whined silently, your tiny fragile hands reaching in the air. He immediately brought his face towards yours, until your soft fingertips touched his face. You immediately calmed down at the warmth, tiny breaths leaving your lips. He was enjoying the peaceful silence with you in his arms, keeping his face close to your fingertips to touch. A doctor ended this silence, as she barged in with a map in her hands. She cleared her throat, making Jake Sully stop his chuckles as he sat up straight in his wheelchair, "is she okay, doc?" He asked with worry plastered on his face as he talked about your mother. The doctor shook her head, "I'm sorry for your loss, sir." His eyes widen in shock, "what? What do you mean?" He held you tighter in his arms, bringing you closer to him as you snuggled into his warmth. "She didn't make it, we tried everything. I'm sorry for your loss." She repeated and he felt his heart drop. He promised your father to keep your mother safe and he failed in doing just that. "Other relatives in the system are unconfirmed, so we will put her up for adop-" Jake cut the doctor off, not daring her to even finish that sentence, "no!" His sudden booming face made you sob, wondering why the familiar warmth holding onto you was feeling so distressed. "No no baby, I'm sorry. Don't cry baby." He shushed you as he pressed his forehead against yours, rocking you back and forth, "I'm sorry for scaring you, baby. There is nothing." He pressed a kiss against your cheek and soon your wailing stopped. The doctor gave Jake a knowing look, writing something down on the papers in her hand, "did you want to adopt her?" She didn't even need to ask to know the answer to that. Jake's gaze moved from your small figure toward the doctor in front of him, "Yes please, I can't lose her." He gently stroked your baby hair as he shushed you to sleep. "I want you to bear in mind that it will be a long process before she can permanently live with you." But he didn't mind, as long as he could have you, he would be alright with that. "That's okay, I'm prepared for that." She handed him the pen as she held the map out in front of him, to sign that he would like to adopt you. Jake didn't need to think twice, as he took the pen in his grip and signed at the bottom of the paper, all while supporting your fragile little head. "Can I also ask for the confirmed name? We never got to ask the mother, unfortunately." Jake looked back at your adorable sleeping figure, your grip on his finger, definitely not planning to let him go. He thought back to the conversations he had with your father, then your mother. He looked back at the doctor with a determined smile,
"(Y/N) (L/N)."
You, Seb, and Raja were separated into different groups as well as Neteyam and Lo'ak. You were so disappointed when it happened, but you couldn't show or voice that. This was a serious mission after all. The three of you had different skills, hence you were placed into different groups as well. Lo'ak and Neteyam were told to be spotters, flying on their Ikrans to spot any danger lurking around the corners. You were happy for them to be taking part in this raid, especially for Lo'ak since it had been a struggle for him to be a part of hunts and raids like these. After the meeting, everyone immediately went off to train and prepare for the big raid in a few days. Seb and Raja went to greet you before they also went off to work on the preparations, which included teaching the Na'vi. Raja was amazing in hand-to-hand combat and Seb's skills lay in the bows and guns. They would definitely be alright in their hands. Neteyam and Lo'ak still stood with you as you zoned out, thinking about why Eywa would do this to you. "Sissy?" Neteyam crouched down to your height as he poked your sides with his tail, wrapping it around your arm right after to shake you out of your thoughts. You felt a tug at your arm, a soft touch to your skin, and you flinched towards Neteyam, "sorry, yes?" Lo'ak tilted his head in worry, "big sis, are you okay?" Before you could answer his question, Neteyam chimed in, "is it about dad?" You sighed at the mention of your father, nodding your head to confirm their suspicions, "yeah actually. What is eywa planning with this?" You didn't want to voice it, but you felt nervous. These past few days you tried your best to have the minimum contact with him, but now you were basically forced to spend your days with him until the raid. "Don't question Eywa's ways, sissy. I'm sure she has a reason to." He wrapped his arm around you, making you flush at the affection. You were used to hugging yes, especially because of Raja, but this was your baby brother. Your family by blood. You felt so comforted. "He's right big sis, and I mean, if you make up with him, evetually, we can have you with us!", Lo'ak soon joined the hug. It was a little awkward since you were much shorter than your brothers, but that didn't matter to you at all. They were your precious baby brothers. You pulled Lo'ak down to press a kiss on his cheek, turning to Neteyam to do the same to him, "my two favorite warriors!" They both flushed at your affection, their tails swished from left to right as their ears perked up. They got affection from their big sister, not you as a warrior, but their sissy. Something both of them definitely needed during these harsh times with Neteyam needing to be the perfect son and Lo'ak feeling out of place.
An awkward-sounding cough was heard behind you, so you pulled away from the hug and turned around to come face-to-face with your dad. Neteyam immediately took a step back, meanwhile Lo'ak plucked on his loincloth, ignoring his father's gaze. "Lo'ak, Neteyam. Go see your mother." Neteyam's expression immediately faltered as well as Lo'ak's. The only things they were told were orders or when they fucked up. "Yes sir" the two of them said as their ears pressed against their heads, their tails between their legs, showing that they were visibly upset. You frowned at his words, "Don't talk to my brothers like that," you turned your back to him and faced your baby brothers. You held both of their hands as you caressed them, "I will see you later, okay? I'll visit you, or you come to me whatever you prefer." The two of them nodded, their smiles reaching their eyes once again thanks to your kind words. They greeted you with shy smiles before heading the opposite way. Jake's gaze faltered. He wanted to spend time with you to reconcile, but he wasn't off to a great start. Not at all. "(Y/N), I really want to make this right between us. I want us to reconcile and have that father-daughter relationship we used to have." You just listened to his words, staring right into his eyes. "So, please give me a chance to make this right. Please give me a chance to take me back as your father." He stepped closer to you, sitting on his knees and taking your hands in his. You pursed your lips, something you have been doing a lot these past few days. You saw the genuineness in his eyes and heard it in his voice. You almost felt bad. Almost. "I'm on your team, so we might as well talk about the mission, right?" Your tone was neutral as you spoke, but Jake knew that you had just given him his chance. Bad blood in the team during a mission never was good, it could lead to defeat. That's what you told yourself, but was that really the main reason you wanted to spend time with him? A bright smile made its way on Jake's face as he gave your hands one more squeeze, pulling away to give you some space. "Thank you, thank you so much, let's get to one of the labs for your comfort?" You nodded your head, "that would be nice yes." You didn't mind waiting for him, because he would most likely follow you. And definitely not to your surprise, he did.
The two of you headed to one of the labs at high camp instead of the one in the forest meant for you, Seb and Raja to stay at. The lab was in the forest so that you could keep watch on anything weird that could happen and alert high camp in case. But now you couldn't bother to head that way. One, you were lazy. Two, it's easier to get to this lab. Three, literally the same reason as the first two reasons. A better reason could be that both Seb and Raja needed the lab to run in and out of while teaching. You went to one of the labs at the back, hoping that that one would be empty. Once you reached the entrance, you twisted the lock open and fortunately the lights were off, indicating no one was inside to disturb you. Jake held the door open for you as you walked in, taking your mask off and hanging it at your hip. He stepped in after you and took one of the oxygen masks off the wall, hanging the cord around his neck and immediately bringing the mask to his face to take a whiff of the Pandorean air. You opened the second door and stepped inside the lab, clicking a few buttons that made the lights and screens turn on. You stepped towards the table right in the middle of the lab, putting your weapons down for you to sit comfortably on the chair. You pulled the tablet from under the table and clicked the button on the right to turn it on, dragging the screen towards the table to make it appear on the flat metal. Your father followed right after you, looming over your body from behind. He rested his forearms against the table, next to your figure, and took a step back to slightly bend over to meet your gaze. With your finger, you drew a line on the tablet, drawing the path the transport would take. At the same time, a line identical to the one you drew also appeared on the metal table. "I would like to offer you my plan, if you don't mind?" With your mask off, your entire face was visible for Jake Sully to see. Finally, he had a chance to see what emotions you were feeling. "Of course, go ahead babygirl." The nickname felt so natural to him as it left his lips to the point he couldn't stop calling you that even if he had a gun pointed at his head. You would always be his babygirl, his dearest. Your eyes slightly widened at the nickname. You thought he would stop calling you that after you full-on ignored his feelings and dedication, but he didn't and you felt your heart flutter. You started explaining your strategy, drawing different lines and notes on the map. You sometimes muttered to yourself, speaking to yourself and it made Jake slightly teary-eyed. It sounded awfully close to the babbling you used to do as a little kid when you were excited or concentrated. Instead of the warrior that you were, he saw his little girl in front of him, brows furrowed and muttering to herself. He could listen to you all day, whether it was important or the stupidest story. "Are you even listening?" You frowned at him as you stopped with what you were doing, slightly hurt at the fact he wasn't even listening to you as you spoke, even though you gave him a chance. "Whatever." You stood up from your seat, visibly hurt as you got ready to leave, but your father gripped your hand. The touch was gentle, "I listened. I listened to every word you said. You just didn't change. The way you muttered to yourself, you did that when you were a kid. Babbling as you were concentrating." You tilted your head to the side, still not believing a word he said. Jake Sully knew that you didn't want his words, but his action. So he showed you, by re-explaining everything you told him, the exact words you used and pointing at the exact lines and notes as he did. You couldn't help but smile at his action, feeling giddy at the fact he actually listened to every word you told him. Jake watched as you smiled, cheering inside his head as he finally made you smile.
He finally knew what to do.
It soon reached eclipse and you realized you were longer with your father than you expected it to be. What you thought would only take an hour, turned out to take an entire day. The two of you talked about the past approaches as front field, as well as the Na'vi on the direhorses. You also explained what would be best for Raja and Seb to do: Raja with the direhorses and Seb shooting from midair. Meanwhile you came to the conclusion you would be best with Jake on his Ikran, attacking the helicopters. You didn't want to say it out loud, but you actually had a lot of fun. It felt like a bonding moment, not really on the father-daughter scale, but slow steps. Jake also felt like he was doing a great job. It was a slow progress, but he understood. For you, he would wait for decades. "It's getting late, where are you staying?" There was Jake Sully's father instinct. Who could you fool, he always had that instinct, from the moment he met you. "I promised to meet up with Lo'ak and Teyam, after that I will head to the forest." He shook his head, his hand on your shoulder, "You're not going alone, especially not with those knuckleheads. Tell me when you're ready to head home. I'll bring you." His hand traveled to your cheek, stroking it with his thumb before he left the lab. He knew he had to leave for now, to give you some space. But outside, Jake Sully couldn't help but jump in the air as he balled his fists, throwing his arms in the air as he celebrated his first win, his first step into making things better with you. You could hear him from the inside, shaking your head as you couldn't help but smile. Maybe it was time to give him a chance.
"Waaah!! Papa!!!" You frantically wailed as you were on the mossy ground, your dress covered in dirt and your knees scraped, covered in blood and dirt. Jake Sully didn't think for another second as he wheeled toward you, his expression laced in worry and pain to see his little princess in pain. "Baby!! Princess I'm here, I'm here." He bent over to pick you off the ground, placing you on his lap as you continued to cry. The two of you were at a playground. You were happily playing, running from the slide to the swings and the monkey bars. When you were about to rush towards the swings, you tripped over a rock and fell to the dirt covered ground, making you wail loudly. He inspected your face first, then your hands and arms and lastly your legs. Your eyes were teary as you spoke, nose running, "papa it hurts." You sobbed as your grip on his shirt tightened. He took your bag with one hand as his other was rubbing soothing circles on your back, "papa is going to take care of it, alright? Papa will help you." You could only nod as you rubbed your teary eye with one of your hands. He opened your adorable bag, pulling a first aid kit out. He may be terrible at taking care of himself, but taking care of you is what he CAN do. "Babygirl, this is going to hurt. I need to clean your wounds, because I can't let your wounds be dirty. You understand that right?" You just nodded in response. You were a strong girl, you can listen to your daddy. He took a tissue and the small bottle of desinfectant in his hand, "squeeze daddy if you have to, okay?" He opened the bottle and carefully squirted the alcohol on your knees, making you sob. The tears rolled down your cheeks as you squeezed your father's arms. But you didn't scream, you were a strong girl. He watched how the dirt removed itself from your wounds and how your skin pulsed at the chemical reaction. He proceeded to carefully tap your knees dry, all while you silently sniffed. He pressed a kiss onto your cheek and finally put a plaster in each wound. You smiled at the plaster. It was a plaster of your favorite cartoon character. He pressed his lips against yours, drying your tears with a tissue, "there you go, good girl." You thanked him with another kiss, "i love you papa!!"
"Goodmorning sissy" Neteyam greeted you at the opening of the cave. You beamed at him as Lo'ak helped you off his Ikran. The morning after your bonding with your father, you didn't expect to be woken up so early. You opened the door to the lab as Lo'ak stood there with a grin on his face, "You're coming with me." You couldn't protest as he just picked you up and put you on his Ikran, heading off to god knows where. You could here Seb screaming after you as you disappeared into the air. Something along the lines of: "see you soon!" You grinned at Neteyam as you pulled at his waist, forcing him to get down so that you could pull him in a hug, "Goodmorning mighty warrior." Lo'ak sent his Ikran away as he walked up to the two of you, leaning on your head with his elbow, "so what's the plan today?" You frowned at his gesture and smacked his arm away, "you were the one that brought me here so early in the morning! You can tell me what I am supposed to do here so early!" You grumbled, you could have slept in and taken your sweet time to get ready, but Lo'ak just had to rush you as he was too excited to function. He pouted at you in return, "sorry big sis, I was too excited." He smiled sheepishly at you as he poked your cheek. "Come have breakfast with us, sissy." Before you could answer, Neteyam had already grabbed onto your hand and pulling you to their home, "Neteyam wait! I don't want to intrude!" You tried to pull away from his grip. You didn't belong to their family, it was their fortress. Not yours. But Neteyam didn't listen to you. Lo'ak followed behind excitedly, "this is gonna be so fun! You won't intrude big sis, we will finally have breakfast as a complete family!"
"Oel Ngati Kameie, I'm sorry to intrude." The words leave your lips as you entered their home, feeling slightly ashamed as you did so. Neteyam pulled you inside as he faced his parents, who were seated at the table in surprise at your arrival. Jake Sully immediately felt warm inside at the sight of his oldest daughter, "come sit, babygirl." He scooted over, now sitting on the head of the table. This way seven people could fit the table. Again, Neteyam pulled you toward the table, forcing you to sit down as he took a seat next to you. Lo'ak sat down in front of you as he grinned at you. Next to him sat Kiri and Tuk. Then lastly Neytiri, who sat next to Neteyam and in front of Tuk. Jake looked at his family with a proud look on his face. You were sitting right next to him and you still looked a little nervous. "Hii (Y/N)!!" Tuk's voice boomed through the pod as she yelled in excitement. "Tuk, behave! Goodmorning sis." You smiled at Kiri and Tuk at the end of the table, greeting them in return. Neteyam wrapped his arm around you with a grin, "we have fruits right?" It was more of a global question that he asked, waiting for a response from someone that knew. "Yes, we do." Neytiri got up from her seat to get the food, Kiri following after her mother to help. You wanted to get up to give a helping hand as well, but Jake stopped you by putting his hand on yours, holding it affectionately, "It's okay baby, sit." To get everyone talking, Lo'ak chirped in with a question, "tell us about your training on earth please!" His eyes were sparkling as he sat across from you, his hand on the table as he waited for your answer. Before you could answer, Jake leaned his elbow on the table as he rested his chin on his palm, "I would also like to know, if you don't mind telling that is."
You smiled at your father, knowing he couldn't even see it. But your eyes told it all to him. Once Neytiri and your sisters returned, they set the food down on the table: sturmbeest meat and small portions of different fruits. You didn't want to take anything, as you already intruded on their family bonding moment, but Neytiri insisted as she filled you a portion of fruits and demanding you to eat them, since you couldn't eat the Na'vi meat. You thanked her with a grateful nod, before you cleared your throat, "well Lo'ak. It all started because of my last name." You glanced at your father and your gaze never left him as you spoke. You told them how you were founded, the training you went through, the people you met, your achievements, all that. Tuk was so interested that she kept asking questions, Neytiri telling her to not talk with her mouthful. Your father in the meantime couldn't stop staring at you, the way you spoke and excitedly told them about your experiences. He then realized how much he had actually missed of your life. His food was already cold when you finished talking, untouched as his focus was on you.
After breakfast, your father needed you with him again. Much to your disappointment, you greeted your siblings and Neytiri on the way out. "Where are we going?" He grinned at you in return as he grabbed your hand, "You'll see." He led you to where the Ikrans were stalled and your eyes sparkled. Still holding onto your hand, he got his own Ikran out of his stall. Your gaze moved from the Ikrans towards your hands intertwined. You didn't feel an insane amount of resentment for him anymore, so you could allow it. He did try his best like he said he would, after all. "This is bob, bob this is (Y/N), my daughter." You facepalmed at the name. You couldn't believe what you were hearing, "bob?" It was more of an 'are you serious' tone rather than a question. "Yes, bob." He brought his free hand towards the Ikran's face, petting his snout with a proud smile. "And you named me?" Your reply was sassy and Jake couldn't help but pinch your cheek through your mask with the hand that used to be holding yours, "Don't be like that missy, we are going on a flight."
Your father helped you settle down on his Ikran, but you insisted that you could do it on your own, denying his help completely. Disappointed, he then proceeded to take a seat behind you, "do you know where to hold?" He moved closer towards your small body, the back of your head hitting his torso for your comfort. "Yes, my first ride was with Teyam, I'll be fine yes." You held onto the reins as you tried your best not to lean into your father's warmth, but he beat you to it as he wrapped one arm around your torso, the other holding onto the reins. Jake couldn't deny that he felt jealous of his own sons, their relationship was tense ever since he saw how happy you were with them. He was being incredibly childish, but he couldn't help it. "You and he are very close, aren't you?" He grumbled as he made Bob walk towards the entrance of the cave. The jealousy was obvious as it was laced in his tone. It actually made you chuckle, seeing your father all grumpy like that. "Yes, we sure are." You decided to see how far you could push him. "But you're my daughter." He grumbled again, pulling onto the reins, making Bob take off into the sky. The impact made you press against your father, a screech of excitement leaving your lips. Once you calmed down, you turned to answer, "you gotta work for my respect, papa." And his eyes sparkled at that nickname.
The next few days, you mostly spend them with your father. Mostly planning the raid and working on your relationship, kinda. You never forgot about your siblings though: flying with Neteyam, exploring with Lo'ak, making flower crowns with Tuk and lying in the grass with Kiri. Your father and you have been growing closer bit by bit. You weren't fully there though, not ready to be all giddy with him just yet. Yet during these days of spending your time with him, the guilt was eating you from the inside. The way your father was so focused on reconciling with you to the point he sent his children away whenever they wanted to ask him something or show him their achievements. You went so long without a father figure. You didn't want your siblings to go through that as well. You started wondering, you weren't even his child by blood, did you deserve his attention? He was always busy being with you, instead of being with his kids. An example is that he taught you how to fish, such a dad thing to do. Even though it wasn't the usual fishing you knew on earth, it was still fun with the bow and arrow. You would much rather hit your enemies close with your katana than from far away like that. It was still enjoyable either way. The two of you also decided to practice your strategy: you jumping off his Ikran, hitting the target and your father catching you midair. He thought you were insane when you told him so, scolding you like a father would. But you reminded him that you were a trained warrior, that you trained for this day and that he couldn't take that away from you. He eventually gave in, hence you practiced a lot with him. Whatever happened, you just knew he would always catch you.
"Papa? Papa dead?" Your teary-eyed face shook your dad's body, who was on your couch breathing heavily. "Baby, I'm okay." Jake was sweating profusely as he saw everything blurry, but he always managed to try and keep you from worrying. You touched his sticky face, babbling as you tried to keep him awake, "daddy no die!" You got up from the floor as you ran and disappeared into the kitchen. You came back with the first aid kit box and a bottle of water. You put everything on the floor as you sobbed, "papa help!" You took a plaster, removing the foil to stick the sticky part on his arm, "papa please!!" Your pleads kept him from falling asleep, as he squinted his eyes to focus on his surroundings. "Baby, the blue striped box." He mumbled, knowing that the box filled with paracetamol looked like that. You frantically looked through the stuff. Fortunately, you were good with colors and figures. You took the box in your hand and showed it to him, "papa what now?" He then proceeded to give you instructions while barely holding onto his sanity. He felt so lightheaded. He's so lucky that you're a smart little girl. You popped a pill out of the pack and poked it at his bottom lip, "papa open!!" He slighty sat up and you held onto his arm for support. Not that it did anything, but you caring for him was more than enough. Your father opened his mouth as you put it on his tongue. You then brought the glass closer to his lips, "papa sip!" He slightly smiled at your caring manner and opened his mouth, gulping the water down as the pill slid down his throat. You then climbed to lay down on his torso, your arms around his neck as you kissed his chin, "papa better?" He didn't know if the medicine is already working or not, but with you on his chest, he immediately felt sober and healthy.
It was the day of the raid. Your first official mission on Pandora, your years of training not going in vain. You were so snappy since you realized your insecurities, the guiltier you felt the more frustrated you grew. You didn't dare voice them to anyone. You couldn't complain, you didn't have the right to complain. You were the source of the family's imbalance. Yet, you felt like you were being so selfish. You wanted to spend time with your father so badly after a decade of not seeing him and you couldn't stay away from your siblings, they were your dearest. Again, you were with Neteyam at high camp, somewhere at the side of the cave. The two of you were attached to the hip. He was cuddling right at you, burying his face in your shoulder, ears pressed to his head, "dad is being so hard on us." He mumbled as you pressed him against you, rubbing his ears with his fingertips. Lo'ak was god knows where, probably making a mess just for Neteyam to clean it up again. "I know Teyam, I'm sorry." You didn't know why you were apologizing to him. Deep inside you knew why, you were breaking their relationship by just existing. You thought that it was bullshit that someone could be a bother by just existing, but you were that person. Neteyam ignored your apology, since he didn't understand what you meant, as he hugged you tighter against him, silent sniffs leaving his nose, "I'm so tired, but I don't want to disappoint." Your eyes soften at his words, shaking your head as you scratched his ears, "You don't disappoint baby bro, I'm so proud of you. I look up to you so much, you're such a strong young boy with a strong heart." He flushed at your compliments, his tail swaying from left to right as you held him in his arms, "thank you sissy." Neteyam has been the clingiest with you so far, always looking for you like a lost cat with his tail between his legs. From the start he always held his worries to himself and never complained about anything, sucking everything up that was thrown at him. Now that he had a big sister, he wouldn't dare to miss the opportunity to be the young fragile sibling for once. This was also why you didn't dare voice your insecurities and thoughts: he needed a place to spill his heart out too without worrying about anything after. "Neteyam!" Neteyam immediately pulled away from your hug, getting off the ground with his tail between his legs, "yes sir." Jake stood in front of the two of you with his arms crossed, "I didn't expect you to slack off. Go fetch your brother." Neteyam pursed his lips as he firmly nodded his head, "yes sir." Without looking back at you, he headed the other way, his walk confident yet you knew it was a facade. "You're very hard on him." You watched your dad with a frown, anger taking your body over as this terrible behavior towards his children by blood got to you mixed with your mixed feelings. "I'm their father, it's my job." Jake's expression didn't falter at all, his face as neutral as ever whenever he spoke to his sons. That just made you even angrier, "this is a family, not your marine squad that you can only go to for orders for christs sake!" You balled your fists as you walked past him, your shoulder hitting his arm on the way. He then proceeded to grab your wrist, obviously upset at your change of behavior, "they need me to go hard on them to get strong, (Y/N)." You harshly pulled your hand away from him, "No Toruk Makto, they need their dad." And you walked away without looking back. After the whole ordeal, Neytiri emerged from the shadows, her expression upset as she listened from the moment Neteyam spoke from the bottom of his heart to you blowing up on your father, "she's right you know. You are very hard on them. They're your sons, not your army." Yet Jake Sully didn't hear her, as his mind was only on you, suddenly feeling like all the efforts on his progression were thrown out of the window and back at zero.
The ride to where the raid would take place was awkward. Your father kept trying to make small talk with you as you stood behind him, your hand gripping on his shoulder while your other held your katana, but you didn't reply to any of his questions or words. You were so furious at him for still treating your siblings like that while trying to make up with you. You didn't want it to look like he favored you, because it really did look like that: neglecting his children by blood, because he is trying to reconcile with the girl that only shares his last name. You started second guessing your worth, you didn't belong to his family. You were his past after all and he settled down. You were only intruding at this point, intruding in their family. You shouldn't have ever revealed yourself. "Babygirl please," Jake was desperate as he spoke. He trusted, no, he believed that the raid would be successful, but one should always be prepared for bad outcomes and he didn't want it to end like this, was it to be a bad outcome. "Jake, stop." The way his name rolled off your lips hurt. You never called him by his name before, not even when the two of you met. "Let's talk, please." His grip on the reins tightened. He felt sick to his stomach the closer they got to the transported goods. He didn't know why, but he felt his stomach churn. Something inside him told him to talk to you, now. "If this is about Neteyam then-" "Later." You cut him off. You couldn't talk about how you felt, not now. Not when you were about to enter a warzone. You almost chuckled at the mention of your little brother. You wished it was only about him. If it was, then you could have found an easier way to fix this mess. But this was also about you. You stole their dad and husband away for the past few days. You worsened the relationship between a father and his sons. You're ripping the family apart by intruding, you don't belong in that family. You don't belong. You bit your lip so hard until you tasted the metallic on your tastebuds. Meanwhile Jake Sully sighed in frustration, knowing he had to push this conversation back to after the raid.
If everything went well that is.
"Attack!!!" Jake Sully pulled at the reins, rushing over towards a helicopter that turned around. The train that transported the goods just exploded and went up into flames, which was the queue for the direhorses to emerge from the shadows. Your father got extremely close to the helicopter, flying sideways. Just as the helicopter was about to point its guns at you, you jumped off Bob, right onto the glass as you plunged your sharpened katana through the glass. It hit the man into the vehicle, killing him instantly. Before the helicopter could explode you jumped into the air, away from the explosion. You didn't feel the slightest bit surprised when an arm wrapped around your waist. Your father moved his grip to your wrist, as you were much lighter than a Na'vi this tactic worked perfectly with you. "I'm going to throw you, okay?" You just nodded in response as he swung his arm and threw you like you were a feather, right into the window of a helicopter. You already held your katana in front of you, hitting the human on impact as he was knocked out. You were hanging onto the helicopter that slowly descended. You were waiting for your father to fly right under you to catch you, but you didn't notice that a helicopter was pointing its guns right at you, obviously seeing you as a threat. "(Y/N)!!" Jake's voiced cracked as he screamed. He couldn't load his gun in time, or stop the helicopter in time. Even if he did try to hit it, you would already be hit. Then an arrow flew through the air at an inhumane speed, shooting the helicopter down. Jake quickly flew your way as he grabbed you from the descending helicopter, with your katana and all. You looked to where the arrow came from and saw a familiar Ikran. It was Neytiri. You silently thanked her in your head, hoping that your gratefulness would reach her. You intruded her family, yet she still decided to save you. "Are you okay?!" Jake put you in front of you, right on his lap as he checked your outfit for any deep cuts. You slightly pushed him away, "I'm fine, really." You tried your best to calm him down. He was the Olo'eyktan after all, he needed to keep watch at his people, not only worry about you. You were a big girl after all, a warrior. Yet in his eyes, you were still his little girl. You looked around the sky, searching for your baby bro's. You knew they were spotters, so they should be somewhere here. Then you saw it, two familiar Ikrans descending to the ground. You squinted your eyes as you tried to see who the two figures were. That's when it hit you, you're baby bro's. "Jake land!!!" You frantically screamed as you tried to get off his Ikran. "What is up w-" "LAND FOR CHRISTS SAKE!!" You needed to get them out of there, no matter what. Jake just obeys. He needed to get down there anyway to see how the ground teams were doing. He would keep you in his sight though. You immediately jumped off his Ikran, sprinting through the swarm of Na'vi as you ran towards your babies. You ran past Raja, who looked at you with a confused expression as she noticed you. This wasn't your position, so she felt flabbergasted as you never disobeyed orders, but she couldn't let that linger into her mind as she focused on her task. "Lo'ak!! Neteyam!" You noticed how a Na'vi passed a gun to Lo'ak. He waved it around in the air, showing it off to Neteyam. You finally got to them, grabbing it out of his hands, "what are you doing here?!? Are you okay?!?" You frantically looked for any injuries, but Lo'ak just ruffled your hair as he took the gun back, "we are okay silly sis!!" "No Lo'ak! We need to get back to the sky! We are spotters!"
"Watch out!! Enemies incoming!!!" A Na'vi yelled the words through the air and a huge helicopter turned the corner, loaded with missiles and all. You grabbed your brothers' hands and pulled them with you, "we gotta run! Run!!" Even though your legs were short, your stamina was amazing. Fortunately, you could keep up with your much taller brothers that way. Jake watched the scene unfold from afar and he didn't wait a second to sprint towards you, pushing everyone that was in his way to the side. "Missile!!!" Someone screamed as a ton of missiles were shot their way. You looked behind you as your eyes widened, one was directly coming your way. And it would hurt your siblings. Without thinking, you pushed your brothers away, making them fall and roll over. You prayed to Eywa to keep them safe as you braced for impact.
Screams.
Blacked out.
Nothing.
"Babygirl!! Babygirl!!" Jake took your limp body in his arms. The tears were rolling down his cheeks as he watched your lifeless body, your eyes rolled back to your skull, "Eywa please, don't do this to me. I'm so sorry for my sins. I'm so sorry for everything. Please don't take her away from me, please." Yet his pleas weren't answered as he cried in your bleeding chest.
Nothing is what it seems.
Thank you so much for reading, this is so long what the hell. I was lowkey insecure about posting this one. I hope you enjoyed and lmk what you thought! <3 THIS IS NOT THE END.
Taglist in the comments!!
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yeonzzzn · 2 months
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I love your writing. I have a request that is based on something I read from another writer about another group. So if you don't feel comfortable writing it, I totally understand. I am just interested to know what you think of the scenario in which y/n is the 8 member of ENHA and she bets the Hyung line that she can guess who they are just by the way they have sex with her while she's blindfolded.
Alternatively, how about a scenario in which the Hyung line each take y/n on a separate date but they have a bet amongst themselves that they won't be the first to fuck y/n. But they're all down bad for y/n and the struggle is real. They all want each other to fold so they can have you. Who do you think would win the bet?
MUCH LOVE AND PRAISE. 🥰
god I LOVE the one of yn guessing which hyung member based on how they have sex with her while blindfolded.
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I just KNOW the moment you even bet the hyung line you could guess who was who by the way they fuck would be driving each of them up a wall. The four of them would have to have a secret meeting together, discussing whether or not to even go through with this. mostly because you’re the 8th member of their group, you are so precious to them and so deserving and so so so kind to them and deal with their bullshit on the daily…but oh god how could they pass this up? the opportunity to fuck you? to ruin you one by one with their cocks while blindfolded? it was so hot to them. they would be stupid to turn it down.
once they decide to take you up on the offer, the boys will have to establish some rules, this was all an experiment after all.
the first rule being that the members can ONLY fuck you once. yes there can be multiple rounds after you guess who they are, but after the time is up they can’t do it again, not until each member has had their turn. each fuck has to be spaced out a couple days to keep you from being sore or completely fucked out.
the second rule is each member IS allowed to kiss you and touch you in anyway they want during sex, they just can’t speak, moan, groan, growl, hiss, whimper, nothing. not a sound until after you guess who they are if you are indeed, correct.
the third rule is none of the members can interrupt. no. matter. what. it could miss up the game on you guessing and show acts of jealousy, which no one wants. 
the fourth rule is all four of them have to be in the know when it’s time to fuck you. none of them can randomly come up behind you and slap a blindfold over your eyes and rail you without the other men knowing. it’s cheating, mostly if you are in a situation that it’s obvious on which member it is. they also have to discus with you on when it’s a good time to even experiment, every party has to be in the know and okay.
the fifth rule being the other members couldn’t be present when the other gets to fuck. this is another way to keep interruption from happening or if the boys decide to pull their hard cocks from their pants while watching you get railed and jerk themselves off and accidentally making any noises.
the sixth rule is neither of the boys can touch you in anyway, shape or form after they’ve had sex with you. once their cocks have been inside you, you become off limits. it’s another way to make sure jealousy doesn’t happen and to keep the game fair for the other men waiting for their fuck. 
the seventh and final rule is being no hard feelings in the end. because if you choose to have sex with one of them again(or even all four of them again) they each have to respect it. if you catch feelings along the way too for one of them, they have to respect it. but that is only a BIG IF on if the situation even takes that route. because you could literally just be looking to get railed by them and have some fun.
which honestly you are. the four of them are the sexiest men you’ve ever seen and you get to look at them everyday, why wouldn’t you want each of them to impale you with their cocks? plus you know each of them like the back of your hand, guessing who was who wouldn’t be a challenge.
you honestly would look forward to it each time. you knew the minute the four of them came up to you with those smirks on their faces that they agreed to the experiment and challenge, a blindfold already in one of their hands signaling that it starts right now.
each time they’ll have you put the blindfold on yourself. the boys will draw straws before hand on who gets to go first to make it fair and have it not be in any specific order.
you knew the minute his hands and lips were on yours that it was jake who drew the lucky straw first. the way his hands squeezed your waist and plump lips kissed you, it was obvious from the start. jake is a big tits guy and very big on doggy, and it doesn’t take a genius to figure that out. The way he flips your naked body over to fuck you from behind with both his hands squeezing your breasts, biting his lips to keep from moaning out on how pleasurable your cunt was wrapped around him. “I know it’s you jakey,” you cooed, “lemme hear you,” god jake would be fucking losing his mind as he pounded into you faster, letting every moan he was holding back escape his lips as he snatches that blindfold off your eyes, placing his hand at the front of your neck to lift you up, his chest connecting to your back, making eye contact with you as he pumps his cock in and out of you, “fuck baby girl,” he growls in your ear, his tongue licking and biting at the lobe, “know me so well just by how I fuck into you, ya? with how I touch and kiss you. fuck yn” the gentleness jake once had with you was out the window as his hips snapped into place against your ass, the fingers that were wrapped around your neck now found their home inside your mouth, and his other fingers circling your clit until you came around him and he was spilling into you.
a few days will go by when the other three approach you, blindfold in hand to repeat the process. you blindfold yourself, they draw the straw and the other were sent out of the room. once again you knew who he was immediately just by the way he pins your arms above your head as his fingers interlock with yours, kissing you so tenderly with so much love. jay is such a lover boy, his hips slowly rocking against yours as he shoved his tongue down your mouth, hands squeezing yours tightly with each thrust into you. you pulled your hands from his grip, wrapping your legs around his waist and sliding your fingers into his hair, finding his ear with the darkness of the blindfold, “jay,” you whine, feeling his cock twitch inside you, “fuck me harder.” jay loved hearing his name fall from your lips the way it did, knowing just by how you called to him and how your body reacts that he was making you feel so fucking good. “shit baby,” he chuckles in your ear, sliding his lips down to your neck and back up to your ear, “your wish is my command.” he pumped himself harder into you, staying at his slow pace. his hands gripped the bedsheets when he felt your legs tightening around him and the clench of your cunt. as much as jay loved making love to you like this, he wanted to make a mess of you, mostly after you guessed right on who he was? it was so fucking hot at how well you knew him sexually even when neither of you have ever acted or spoken in any sexual way together. jay didn’t hesitate to slide his arms underneath you so he would grip onto your shoulders as he fucked into you faster and harder than before, using his teeth to pull the blindfold off from your face so you could stare back at him as you came undone on his cock, watching him as he clenched his jaw and groaned out strings of “fuck” as he shot his seed inside you.
another few days press on by, the remaining two stood before you handing out the blindfold. repeat. repeat. repeat. with the way you were pressed against the door of your room, legs spread wide by his knees, the hand he had at the back of your neck as he pressed the side of your face into the wood of the door and fucked into you at a primal rate you knew as sunghoon. he was rough as he railed you against the door, shit he was rough since the beginning. with how he pulled you from your bed and slammed you to the door and how his hands roamed, it was no doubt sunghoon. he had you moaning his name after the first few hard thrusts into you. his chest touching your back and flinging the blindfold off, “no need for this anymore,” he groaned. sunghoon knew you would guess him quickly, needing to rid that blindfold quickly so he can see the full expressions of your face as he ruined you, “come on baby, keep screaming my name. tell me how good I am giving it to you. let them know how fucking good hoonie is giving it to you.” sunghoon knew the other men were listening, he planned on it too. with the way he was fucking you against the door and how it slammed against the frame, how could they not be listening? sunghoon made it his mission to have you screaming he know within seconds of sliding himself inside you. he’d heard the moans that came from your mouth when jake and jay fucked you, he sure as hell wanted them to hear how loud your voice was getting just by his cock. somewhere along the way it became a competition to see who could get you moaning the loudest and honestly, you were here for it. “hoonie,” you screamed, feeling the drool leave your lips and slide down the door. “fuck yn, being so good for me, taking me so well.” it didn’t take much longer until you released on his cock and his movements getting sloppily until his final thrust had him unloading into you.
the last final days passed on, heeseung appeared into your bedroom and closing the door behind him. there honestly wasn’t any need for the blindfold anymore, heeseung was the last to get his dick wet and either way you’d know it was him. after each fuck the boys gathered to discuss what happened, they knew they would lose against you. you guess each of them perfectly one by one, which is where the contest of seeing who could get you to moan the loudest came into play. even though heeseung was last, it was still only fair he gets his turn. he sat on the edge of your bed, pulling you into his lap and was immediately hard at the sight of the way you straddled him. he placed his hand against the side of your neck, bringing you in to connect his lips to yours, “I’m going to take my time with you,” he whispered in between kisses, loving the way you moaned into his mouth at those words. he rid you and him of your clothes slowly one by one until the two of you were skin against skin, getting turned on just by feeling your flesh against his. heeseung moaned out your name softly as you slid down onto him, his fingers digging into your hips. heeseung didn’t care one bit that he was the last to fuck you. didn’t care about the stupid competition of who could get your vocals the loudest. didn’t care that the rules had to be bent in his favor. because honestly, heeseung was the real winner here. he still got to fuck you, got to fuck you properly at that. he didn’t have to keep his moans down or suppress them until you took a guess. he was able to be as vocal as he wanted from the moment he walked into your room. he got to make eye contact with you the entire time as he felt you up, as you rode his dick and squeezed his shoulders for support. heeseung just knew the other losers were losing their fucking shit as they stood at the other side of the door. heeseung didn’t need to get you screaming at the top of your lungs for the others to know you were fucking his cock into oblivion. “seungie,” you moaned and flung your head back, legs getting weak and shakey, “what it is my love?” he cooed, knowing damn well what it was you wanted, “wanna cum? hmm? want to come undone around seungie’s cock?” you nodded, whimpering out a “please hee,” and that’s all it took. heeseung sat up straighter, wrapping both arms around your body, using every last bit of strength in his hips and legs to fuck up into you. you slid your fingers into his hair, resting the side of your head against his, screaming his name as he hit into your g-spot. oh fuck heeseung was losing himself inside you, his head going dizzy from the pleasure. you no doubt were screaming and moaning louder than the other three got you. you were so loud heeseung was afraid he might lose his hearing in that ear, oh but fuck it would be so worth it. because again, heeseung was the real winner here. was the real winner as he made you come undone on his cock, your cum dripping out of you and sliding down his thighs. the real winner as he moaned out your name when his seed painted your gummy walls white.
jealousy was unavoidable, unfortunately. each of the four boys getting caught up in their feelings for you and how fucking good your pussy felt wrapped around them. but alas, you proved you knew each and every single one of them by how they fuck, only feeding into their egos when you tell you you undoubtably wanted them to fuck you again and again and again and again. each of the four of them brought something to the table when it came to pleasuring you, how could you deny that pleasure? mostly when you have four sexy men drooling over you and your sex. it was well worth it to challenge them.
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koolades-world · 3 months
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Ok ok ok hear me out because this is gonna be so cute
All the brothers but Lucifer turning into babies/toddlers and it’s just the most adorable thing ever
Mammon is clinging to his older brother like he’s his life support(if Lucifer puts him down he cries) 🥺
Omg I’m gonna cry thinking about this
Ok so back to the original thing I was gonna say
Can you do headcanons / a fanfic of MC helping Lucifer deal with his now baby brothers and actually has a knack for it
Like they’re rocking them to sleep, helping feed them, playing with them, etc
MC also obviously takes pictures of Lucifer taking care of his brothers too and it’s the absolute cutest thing you’ve ever seen
The brother’s ages also depend on how old they actually are, so mammon is like 4, Levi is maybe 3, Satan is 2, Asmo is 1, and of course the twins are like a few months old
Belphie and Beel cannot be separated or they will start crying
OMG asmo saying his first words / taking his first steps
I’m actually gonna cry this is so cute
I can totally see Satan insisting he doesn’t wanna be near Lucifer but the moment Lucifer isn’t within his sights he starts throwing a tantrum because he does indeed want to be near him
HFHCKWBGHWJCUSHVZBC anyways-
(Can we also get his reaction to MC humming Belphie and Beel to sleep)
hi!! AWWW this is literally so cute!!!!
parent mc and luci <333
decided to do hcs and a drabble since this is just so so so adorable. i could totally be talked into writing more of this concept haha
please enjoy!
Mc and Lucifer take care of his brothers as babies
I've already decided this was def solomon's fault, just like most other shenanigans
lucifer was at home with his brothers, and you happened to be with diavolo, helping him with a redecoration project at the palace
he could hear his brother yelling in the living room, but suddenly, it all stopped. at first he wasn’t too alarmed, but as the silence persisted, he decided to get up and check it out since his older brother instincts began to kick in
solomon actually met him at his door, word vomited, and almost vanished on him. lucifer managed to catch him by the collar and made him repeat himself
when he finally explained what happened, lucifer almost dropped him out of shock and called you up because he needed major help
once you arrived, you were less upset than lucifer
while he was stressed already, you couldn't help but coo at how adorable they all were
mammon and levi were arguing about something you couldn't understand, satan was occupied with a pillow with tassels on the couch, asmo was playing with the ends of solomon's cape, and the twins were fast asleep
luci fully expects you to back out, and is prepared to deal with them on his own, but is surprised when you scoop up asmo and began playing with him
after that, he learns what a wizz you were with kids
when they had a problem, you were on top of it
the two of you took turns changing diapers and things like that but he was surprised on just how much you were able to handle on your own
his brothers also adored you and were always competing for you attention and showing you all of their things
anything you did, they would want to do too, which was both cute and useful
in the meantime, solomon was supposedly trying to find a reversal spell or potion of some kind, but lucifer didn't really believe him
a few times, you had visitors. luci only allowed diavolo, barbatos, luke, simeon, and solomon into the house. luke had lots of fun and helped you take care of the brothers, while lucifer and simeon talked and did other chores
over this time, luci learnt a lot about you, and grew to appreciate you evermore
"Mammon! Levi! Time for dinner. Come sit down please." You set out four plates of vegetables, pasta, and chicken nuggets for the older brothers. Asmo and Satan were already in their chairs, waiting for food to be served. While they ate, you and Lucifer would feed the twins from a bottle. You'd fallen into a routine and learnt exactly how each of the boys liked everything done.
The two, who were running around the dinner table, settled into their chairs beside each other, and began to eat. Granted, they were arguing the entire time, but as long as they ate their food, you could care less. The arguing became background noise quickly enough.
Once they were mostly finished eating, Lucifer took them upstairs to get ready for bed, while you handled the twins. To make things easier, the two of you decided to let them all sleep in Lucifer's bed. At first, you had wanted to keep Beel and Belphie in a crib in his office, so the others didn't wake them up, but they couldn't rest there for more than an hour or so without waking up and bawling their eyes out.
As Lucifer got his younger brothers into their pajamas for bed, they all began to act as they had every night when he did that routine with them nightly, such as beginning to get restless and whining about bedtime. As he did, and while he humored them, he remembered how thankful he was for you and how he wouldn't be able to do any of this without a child expert like you.
It took him a while, but eventually, he had them to bed, and while it took a little longer, you had the twins to bed temporarily, to give the two of you time to get ready for bed.
"Mc." Lucifer greeted you as you walked into the room with a nod.
"Hey! Everything all good?" You slid into the seat next to him and began eating the plate of food he had set out for you.
"Yes. They're all asleep but I had to promise Mammon cartoons tomorrow morning. Expect to be woken up early." He chuckled a little.
"Ahh, that's alright. Could be worse. Besides, you love him." You smiled at Lucifer. He had finished eating, and was just relaxing, and enjoying the silence. As you continued to talk to him, he sat and stared at you. After a while, you realize he hadn't said much of anything. "What's wrong? Something on my face?" You wiped your face with a napkin.
"No, no. I just wanted to tell you thank you." He paused for a moment before continuing. "Even if this is the rest of out lives, I wouldn't mind, as long as you're here." Lucifer had never said something so sweet so randomly to you.
"Luci! You're too kind. Thank you too." You threw your arms around him. You were thankful for him too, and while you didn't exactly know how to put it in words, you tried your best to put all your feelings into that hug.
Once the two of you were done there and ready for bed, you got the twins and joined his other brothers in bed. You were able to drift to sleep with a baby on your arms and with the thoughts of Lucifer's true affections for you.
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szasfuckingwife · 10 months
Text
WHEN I LOOK IN YOUR EYES, I FEEL ALIVE
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EX CONVICT!TOJI X MOM!READER
WARNINGS: angst, fluff, Toji has gone to prison, Toji fushiguro is a family man and wants his family back !!
SYNOPSIS: Toji being incarcerated fucked you and your daughter up badly, and when he’s released, you want nothing more than to hold him again.
A/N: i was listening to Blue by Beyoncé while writing this and she made that song for her daughter and I just felt the need to sob for some reason🥲 but yeah prisonbf! Toji missing his gf and kid fucks me up.
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When Toji went to prison, you knew it was the end of your relationship. You warned him so many times that this would happened, even before you gave birth to your daughter. And, knowing Toji, there was no convincing him.
The court trial was the worst memory that comes to mind when talking about Toji. When the judge declared he was guilty, it wasn’t a shock to anyone, even Toji.
But it didn’t help that you were there, holding your two year old as police men took him away. Not once, during the whole ordeal, did Toji look back at you two, deciding it was too much to see his girlfriend and daughter who he loved so much get taken away from him. He’d probably break down right there if he looked back.
You cried so much that day, especially when getting told that he’d be facing five years. Even when your lawyer ensured that Toji would face a lot less if he behaves well in prison, it all went in one ear and out the other.
It had been a difficult two years, he’s missed out on so much. Such as, his daughter’s third and fourth birthday, you having a new job and the fact that you and that guys relationship was more serious than he thought.
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He remembers when you told him about it. It was bittersweet due to the fact that you brought your daughter so Toji could see her. “Daddy!” She exclaimed, excited to see her dad even though it’s behind a poorly cleaned window. She was too excited to even speak through the telephone.
But Toji already knew. Toji knew his daughter loved him. He talked to her about school and smiled as his four year old talked about whatever she’d been doing for the past week. Except, she mentioned that her, mommy and ‘that man’ went to the park.
When his daughter said that, Toji looked at you only to see you looking away, embarrassingly. Despite his annoyance, the raven haired man kept smiling at your daughter, even more attentive than he was before.
You took the phone once your daughter was finished, “He’s just a friend from work.”
“Why don’t I know about this guy?” Toji asked whilst keeping his hand pressed up against the glass so his daughter could press her hand up too.
“Because it’s not that serious to be talking about.” You sigh. And you were right, it was a couple of dates and drinks but he didn’t make you feel things that Toji had made you feel. “Don’t do this, Toji, not here. Not in front of her.” Your daughter looks up at you, her hand still separated from her fathers due to the glass.
He scoffed, “Does he sleep over? You fuckin him now, is that it? In my bed, huh?”
You stayed silent, not wanting your daughter to hear you lash out. Toji grew even more annoyed at that, “You know that’s gonna upset her, right? She’s gonna think you’re replacing her dad. That shit isn’t fair, Y/N. You know I’m gonna be released soon.”
“And that’s supposed to make me roll out the red carpet for you? And forget that this shit ever happened?” You scoff. Toji opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again choosing to let you talk. “I’ve missed you so much. She misses you so much. Do you know how hard it has been to raise a child on my own? And for you to give me shit if I wanted to move on? Fuck you, Toji.”
His questions not only angered you, but upset you. You had every right to allow yourself to move on after him being locked up for two years. The fact that he’d even attempt to make you feel bad about that was absurd.
Toji watched silently as you held back tears, put the telephone in its holder and walked away with your daughter.
That was the last conversation he had with you for a year. Toji would’ve slapped his past self for even talking to you like that because he misses you now more than ever.
There were so many times where he’s called you, longing to hear your sweet voice. Even if it’s you saying that he’s a dick and you never wanted to hear from him again.
But that wish was never granted.
‘Hey, it’s me again. It’s nearly peanuts fourth birthday..’ He smiles remembering the nickname you gave your daughter. ‘I was just wondering if maybe you could come around? Or maybe give me a call, just so I can wish her a happy birthday. I miss you more and more each day. Both of you. I love you.’
The voicemail meant nothing to you. It should’ve meant nothing to you. But hearing him say your daughter’s nickname sent tears down your face.
He truly misses his little family.
You can only imagine his excitement when he was released. He called an uber straight to your home, his home. He had nothing but a bag of his possessions and $20 but once he’d see you again, he’d be more than satisfied.
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It was a Saturday morning. You cooked your daughter some scrambled eggs for breakfast, reminding you of her dad who ate eggs almost everyday. Toji was set to be released any time now, and that loomed over your head like a plague.
Suddenly, you hear three loud knocks coming from your door. It startled you, and your daughter who nearly dropped her orange juice. It was probably one of your friends who forgot their bag here, you thought.
But once you opened the door, you were met with an unwanted surprise.
Toji stood, smiling down at you, dressed in a casual hoodie and joggers. He was definitely more buff due to all the muscle gain he earned through prison. It was strange seeing him again. Not behind a glass but in front of you. Not in his orange jumpsuit but in normal clothes.
You wanted to touch him, see if he was real.
“Hey..” He said. Oh, how badly he wanted to kiss you right then and there. Seeing you again after a year was the best thing that has ever happened to him.
When your daughter saw him, stood at the door, her mouth fell open. “You remember me, sweetheart?” Toji crouched down to her height with open arms as she ran towards him.
He almost cried as his little girl sobbed into his shoulder, she wasn’t as little as she was when he last saw her. He realised how much time has passed. And how much he’s missed the both of you.
“Daddy, don’t l-leave again…”, the four year old croaked out, her nose stuffy and eyes watery. Toji rubbed her back, encouraging her to let her feelings out.
Toji almost jumped when he felt an extra pair of hands join in the hug. However, when he looked up and saw you, he was reminded that everything he ever did and everything he’d ever do would be for the two of you. He pulled you into the hug and held you both, kissing both of your foreheads.
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All resentment you felt towards him went away the second you saw him. The three of you caught up, well, it was more of you and your daughter catching him up. The most Toji could do was mention all the times he’s intimidated people at prison, even those serving longer sentences than him. However, Toji was still glad to know you ended things with that guy you were with.
He helped you cook dinner, not forgetting to kiss your cheek every step of the way. The meal truly being made with love. He missed the domesticity of his life. Even when he was going through all his trial stuff, he remembers you, his baby daughter and him all cozied up on the couch, eating spaghetti or something.
And now he had that opportunity again. He enjoyed seeing you remind your daughter to not play with her food and how she asked for ice cream once she was done.
Once the day was over, Toji sat on his bed, his back still not truly recovered from sleeping in a dingy prison bed. It also helped that you were there. You removed his clothes, peppering him with kisses as you did so. He snuggled up to your warm body and just listened to your steady breathing.
“I fucking love you.” He whispers and you hum in response. He knows you and how it’ll take some time before you can utter those words again. If it takes him the rest of his life to make things up to you, he’ll do that.
But that’s fine. As long as he’s with you.
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heartsforhavik · 5 months
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this isn’t paw-some… (bi-han, tomas x gn reader)
warnings: slight angst to comfort in both, established relationship in bi-han's, slight spoilers for mk1 story mode, gender neutral reader
summary: bi-han and tomas vrbada somehow turned into animals! but you have no idea it's them, so you end up telling them a secret... (both separate)
a/n: heyyy so um i had no idea what to write yesterday bc i hated every draft i had but i FINALLY got this one done. idk why but i'm in a phase where i hate everything i write. thanks for your patience guys!
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bi-han
bi-han woke up to his bedsheets completely engulfing him. in confusion, he tried pulling them aside, but it barely moved an inch.
“what is this…?” he tried mumbling, but instead it came out sounding like the meows of a cat.
in a panic, he immediately rolled out of his bedsheets and tried to stand up, but his legs weren't strong enough to hold him up.
in fact, he didn't even have his legs anymore. he had little legs and paws.
this had to be a nightmare. there's no way he just woke up as a cat. fortunately, he happened to have a day off. but he still had many questions. why did he wake up as a cat? is this a permanent change?
but he knew there was no need to stress. bi-han needed to chill out. panicking doesn't solve anything. he must find you, surely you can recognize him immediately.
first, he must learn to walk as a cat. walking on all fours felt so strange to him, especially because his new paws were so sensitive to the hard, wooden floors. but he can get used to it for now.
you heard a quiet scratching noise at your door. thinking someone probably just accidentally brushed up against your door, you ignored it. until you heard it again. and again. louder each time.
you groaned, getting up and opening the door to a cute black cat.
"oh hello there! what are you doing in a place like this?" you giggled, immediately picking it up and petting it gently.
the cat purred in contentment, and rubbed its head against your hand.
while bi-han enjoyed the close proximity to you, he still needed to find out how to let you know *he* is the cat you are holding.
"i wonder if bi-han would approve of you wandering around." you sighed.
bi-han meowed as loud as he could, tapped on your chest with his little paw, then pointed towards himself. he hoped you understood what he was trying to say.
"it looks like you're trying to stretch. maybe we can go for a walk?" you offered, setting him down.
'this is gonna take a while.' bi-han thought. for now, all he could do was grumpily walk beside you.
-
"...and then, bi-han told me he was too busy for a night out. i understand that he's the grandmaster and stuff, but i just wish i could spend more time with him. you know?" you ranted to the cat walking beside you, *still* unaware it was bi-han himself.
he listened intently to what you had to say. it was true, he was very busy most of the time and couldn't spend much time with you. but he had no idea it was affecting you this much. once he turns human again, he'll make sure to fix the problem.
after an hour or so of walking around, you finally got tired and walked back to your home. once you reached your bedroom, you picked up the cat you spent your day with and placed it on your bed.
"i hope you don't have any diseases, that wouldn't be very good for me." you laughed nervously, as you climbed into bed next to the cat.
bi-han looked at you in annoyance and scrunched his little nose as if you just called him something offensive.
"anyways, goodnight little one. i hope we can find your owner tomorrow. if not, i can take care of you! as long as bi-han allows it..." you trailed off. "in fact, i'm really scared of displeasing him.."
bi-han's ears perked up at what you said. why would you be so scared of pleasing him? is he so intimidating that he even makes his significant other frightened?
"i mean, it's not like he's aggressive or anything, i just don't want to disappoint him. i feel like i'm walking on eggshells around him. if i say the wrong thing, he would think i'm unworthy of being with him. sometimes... i'm not sure if he really loves me. if he really loved me, he would put more effort into spending time with me... right?" you whispered, as a small tear escaped from your eye.
bi-han's heart broke a bit when he heard that. he knows that he is a bit.. judgemental. but he never meant to make you feel unloved.
he crawled up to you and licked your tear away. he hoped that it would make you feel a bit better about your situation. he made a mental note to talk to you as soon as he was human again. the last thing bi-han wanted to do was hurt you. even after all the people he has betrayed, hurt, and even killed... you were the only person he never wished to harm.
he cuddled up beside you and made himself comfortable. surely a bit of physical touch would make you feel better? it's not like he has been doing that in his human form anyway.. which he notes to fix soon.
soon you both drifted off to sleep peacefully, with bi-han curled up comfortably in your arms.
the next morning, you woke up to bi-han sleeping right next to you. when did he get there?
“bi-han?” you whispered.
when he woke up, he immediately checked his arms and legs. thankfully, he was human again.
“good morning, beloved. how did you sleep?” bi-han asked, strangely casual even though he magically appeared in your bed.
“i slept.. fine. but i had a cat with me. it was a cute little black cat, it showed up at my door out of nowhere yesterday. it was kind of grumpy, but it listened to me when i ranted to it. it kind of reminded me of you.” you giggled.
“about that…” bi-han sighed. “…i have some explaining to do.”
tomas vrbada
tomas had invited you to madam bo’s for dinner, and he was planning on confessing his feelings to you there. but unfortunately, he couldn't exactly make it.
he accidentally fell asleep, and when he woke up he realized he was late. he immediately got up from his bed and tried standing up, but he couldn't stand on his two legs anymore. because his legs were now full of fur, and he had paws.
this could not be happening. the first time he gained the courage to make a move and ask you out, he ends up turning into a dog.
he had to find a way to get to you and do something. what if you think he stood you up on purpose?
-
you were sitting at a table at madam bo's, waiting for tomas to arrive. you get that he's probably busy, so you were being very patient and decided to wait a bit. but you were sitting there for so long, the place was going to close soon.
you were about to get up and leave, until a golden retriever dog ran up to you with its tail wagging intensely.
it didn't have a collar, so it seemed to be a random stray dog that took a liking to you. but it also seemed so well-behaved, how could it be a stray?
tomas was relieved to see that you were still at the restaurant. he felt bad that he made you wait for nothing, but at least that was a sign that you cared about him.
"oh, hello there. what could you be doing in a place like this?" you greeted, petting the dog in front of you.
tomas felt a bit strange getting petted by you, but it somehow felt really good.
"i was waiting for someone, but he never came..." you sighed. "this place is about to close. maybe you can accompany me while i walk home?"
tomas didn't hesitate to walk beside you, but he couldn't help but feel extremely guilty for wasting your time. he'll find a way to make up for it.
-
"i know he's a busy guy, but wouldn't he know if he couldn't make it today? i kind of got myself all dressed up for nothing.." you admitted, opening up to the loyal dog that never strayed from your side throughout your walk.
tomas's heart broke when he heard how you felt. if only he was human at that moment, he would've been apologizing profusely and trying to make you feel better.
"i really, really like him. i think he's so kind, fun, and he has always cared about me. i was so excited to go on this date with him, because i thought that maybe it was a sign that he liked me back. i'm trying to stay positive and hope that he was probably just busy, but what if he just doesn't actually care about me?" you sighed.
tomas whimpered in response, feeling extremely guilty about hurting you. he never meant to make you feel that way.
"i don't know if you are sad for me or if you're just hungry.. but you're a good listener. you remind me a lot of tomas..." you mumbled, feeling appreciated by your little companion.
-
once you arrived to your house, tomas felt very creepy. he was walking around your bedroom, looking at the little trinkets you have and sniffing around. he couldn't help it, it's like he had an instinct to snoop around your living space now that he was a dog.
"i'm really tired... stay here, and i'll find you some kind of blanket to sleep on. i have to put on my pyjamas first, though." you said, silently regretting that you wasted such a good outfit to be stood up.
when you returned to tomas, he was still sitting in your bedroom and patiently waiting. you laid out a blanket for him, and then you crawled into your own bed.
"goodnight. hopefully i can find your owner tomorrow, if you have one. even though you probably can't understand me and i'm just talking to myself.." you mumbled, rolling over and going to sleep.
tomas tried to think of a way to make it up to you when he was human again. he felt so guilty for hurting you. he hoped you didn't lose feelings for him, it would make him feel even worse if you did.
-
the next morning, you woke up and you were expecting to see the same golden retriever from last night sleeping on the floor.
instead, you looked down and saw tomas himself peacefully asleep on your floor, wearing nothing but a blanket over his privates.
you immediately pinched yourself. this had to be a dream. you had so many questions. what happened with the dog? did tomas break in while you were sleeping?
"tomas?" you whispered.
he slowly opened his eyes, and he let out a sigh of relief as soon as he saw he had his regular body back.
but that sense of accomplishment faded as soon as he noticed that he was pretty much naked on your bedroom floor.
"good morning..." tomas greeted awkwardly.
"good morning." you replied, trying to look respectfully.
you both stood in awkward silence for a solid minute before you finally spoke up.
"so.. what brings you here... naked...?" you asked.
tomas blushed. "well..."
-
"so.. you were the dog from last night?" you questioned.
"yeah. i'm sorry for uh.. you know, turning into a dog and accidentally leaving you alone on that date." tomas apologized.
"did you hear everything i said last night?" you said quietly, embarrassed that you practically poured your heart out to him without knowing it.
"i did. i am still so sorry that i hurt you. i'll make it up to you, i promise. i'll take you out for dinner again, but i'll show up this time. and i'll pay the bill!" he offered.
hell yeah, free food. who could resist that? you instantly agreed to his offer and you had hope that the date would go well this time, and then maybe you two can become something more.
"great! i'll go get ready right now!"
"tomas, you have hours to get ready, there is no need to rush. and you're still naked, by the way." you sighed.
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dabislittlemouse · 8 days
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“𝐈’𝐥𝐥 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞, 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐦𝐞…”
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Part 2 | Dabi x fem!Reader
CW: yandere themes, some mentions of noncon, gaslighting, manipulation, kidnapping, complicated feelings, stockholm syndrome
SYNOPSIS: you are finally saved from the hands of your captor, who was now locked up, far away from you. But to this day, the memory of him still haunts you in your dreams, still so present in your life, still reminding you that you are his girl.
A/N: here the reader finally decides to read Dabi’s letters, we’re taking it slow guys ;)
Part 1 | REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED!
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Your hands rummaged through the mailbox to grab the letters that were sent from Tartarus. You stared at the envelopes, your chest suddenly feeling tight, for a second you were about to change your mind and throw them away. Though you felt something gnawing inside of you, the guilt and fear of ignoring Dabi, you felt like you were still obliged to him even if he was now locked away, technically out of your life. You must read those letters and you must reply back. You wouldn’t want to anger him would you?
“You know what happens when you make me mad..” Dabi would whisper in your ear, grabbing your wrist tightly. “Don’t get out of my eyesight, I won’t repeat myself twice.”
You vividly remember how that day he had taken you to the shopping mall, wanting to spoil you with nice things since you’d been so good to him lately. Though as you would go through the aisles, staring in awe at the variety of clothes and cute things you could buy, you forgot that you had separated from Dabi, when he had clearly told you not to go too far and wait for him.
“Shall I put ya on a leash and drag you around for you to finally understand?” he scoffed.
“I’m sorry” you mumbled. “I won’t walk away again”
First thing you would always do was apologize of course, because you knew how far Dabi would go. If he said something, he would actually do it. And you didn’t want to be on the receiving end of his heinous acts. You remembered how tense you felt, if you had run away and called for help back then, would someone have helped you?
“No” Dabi’s voice echoed in your head. “They would ignore your pleas, leave you there to die, thinking that some righteous hero will come to save you soon. But they don’t care. This is what society has become, rotten to the core.”
This was what he was fighting against, to burn down the whole system, take down the corrupted heroes, and he would passionately talk about it with you, making you part of his bright future.
You shook your head off the thoughts taking over your mind, and opened the envelopes, grabbing the one of the letters.
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“My pretty girl,
wonderin’ what you might be doing right in this moment as I write this. Have you been good? Are you inside your little apartment, watching those favorite TV shows of yours? Or are you outside, going to places that I don’t know of? Meeting new people, having fun and all that? Trying to create a new life after our separation, trying to fit back into society…
I bet you are. I wonder how that is going~
As for me, I am sitting here, losing count of days while being surrounded by these four walls 24/7. Kinda boring to be honest, nothin’ much happenin’ around here. You are all I think of baby, and the remains of your pretty face in my memories. My hands are itching to just grab at it and kiss it just how it deserves to be kissed. I gotta admit, this punishment is much worse than being locked up, it hurts a lot baby. Knowing that all this time you haven’t bothered to check on me once…damn, it really hurts a lot~
You like hurting me though don’t cha? I guess it’s fair, knowing the ways I’ve hurt you and marked your body all over. But you know that it was all out of love, right? That’s how I like to express it, just imagining what a piece of art your body looked like whenever you ended up on my hands baby..
Fuck it- even now as I think about it I’m aching, and your pretty mouth, that soft tongue could be the only solution to my problems~
Do you realise how much I crave you? Physically and mentally, look what you do to me princess. And the more you ignore me, the less that fire goes away. I guess distance strengthens relationships don’t you agree? I wonder how you’ve been feeling lately, do you miss me? Just a little bit? I bet ya do~
I miss you a lot. Terribly. I ain’t good with words so that’s how much I can express it. Y’know I’m mostly a man of actions, words don’t do it for me.
You can ignore me all you want, I won’t stop writing you. I know one day you will be sitting down to read these letters, because I know you feel the same fire inside of you that only I ignited. We are made for each other, you are just meant to be mine, never think otherwise.
Waiting patiently for a letter back. Make sure to put something in your envelope as well. A recent picture of you, your perfume, or maybe something else, y’know it~
Yours only,
Dabi.
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For a while you stared into nothingness, only the sound of your heartbeats in your ears. The letter was clutched tightly on your hands.
“Fuck..” you whispered, before letting out a breathy laugh. You continued laughing to yourself, all while your eyes filled with tears. You weren’t sure if those tears were tears of anger, sadness, hopelessness, fear, love, maybe altogether.
You were terrified, that was certain. Terrified that he still hasn’t forgotten about you, nor given up on you. Terrified that he still thought that this fucked up relationship was true love, despite all the suffering you endured. Through all those sentences and words, you could feel as if Dabi was right in front of you, you could even hear his voice reading the letter for you. It’s like he had possessed you, like a demon that took place in your body and mind forever.
“This isn’t love..” you mumbled. “This is not love, this is NOT LOVE!”
You screamed at the letter, throwing it away.
“I hate you!” you finally burst into tears. “Why can’t you leave my life?! Why, why, why?!”
Why do I miss you like this?
Have you become addicted to the hurt and pain? Or maybe the way he would hold you close and kiss you and worship you right after he completely broke you, maybe you got addicted to that. You could only imagine his reaction if he knew what you’re feeling.
“Told ya so” he would say with a cocky smirk on his face and his cerulean eyes glaring at you hungrily. “Me and you are meant to be”
The rest of the letters pretty much held the same content, though the more he wrote, the filthier he got. It was clear that he craved you badly, as he sat there alone in the prison cell. You squeezed your thighs shut, swallowing nervously while your body remembered the feeling of his cock thrusting in and out of you, always hitting that one special spot deep inside of you and making you see stars.
Apart from everything, Dabi was sexually frustrated. Hands just weren’t enough for the job, they could never replace the way your wet cunt wrapped so nicely around his aching cock. He was getting off on memories, every day and every night, bringing back on his mind the ways he would take you, softly or roughly, just as he pleased. He loved the way you screamed and cried and begged for him to stop, he got addicted to it, nothing and nobody else could even get him hard anymore.
“Do you still get wet for me baby?” Dabi wrote in one of the letters. “Do you play with yourself late at night while remembering the way I ate that pretty pussy of yours, slurping every remaining juice, licking that sweet clit.. I almost drool as I think about your flavor, need to quench my thirst so bad. Just need to dive in between those plush thighs of yours and devour you all damn night, until it gets too much and you start crying. And even then I won’t stop, cause y’know hearing you cry just gets me off real nice. Yeah I am sadistic like that, you already know it baby. And yet you like me just the way I am, you always feel that thrill, I can tell by the way your pussy fluttered each time I got my hands and fingers on it, each time I left marks on you, my little painslut”
Dabi was sure he had turned you into his little masochist, he trained you to cum only when he inflicted pain on you, and the pleasure mixing with it sent you over the edge.
You took all the letters and made sure to get rid of them, burning all of them until they were nothing but ashes. Though the words written in them never burned away, they planted themselves deep inside of you, not leaving your mind for the rest of the day. As the days went by, you decided to distract yourself as best as you could. Meeting your old friend, going out for a walk, going shopping, karaoke nights, watching movies, going for a drink, you name it. And yet you couldn’t shake off the feeling of emptiness, that in some fucked up way only that monster could fill. How could you be so terrified of someone and yet so addicted at the same time? You were sure it would pass as time went by, but it never did. Your body still held the memories of the past, the nasty burn marks were there, probably would stay there forever too. For some reason you found comfort at the old memories, at the old feelings, the abuse had become a familiar thing to you, and you wanted familiar. The outside world and its people, no matter how much you tried to fit in, it was all foreign, unfamiliar, you didn’t belong there.
You belonged to him only.
“Face your fears” someone used to say. “Once you bravely face your fears, they won’t haunt you anymore. Make it known that you don’t submit to them anymore, they don’t affect you anymore, they don’t scare you. And it will all go away”
Should you face Dabi? Should you tell him right to his face that things between you and him have ended forever, that you now are living a good life, happy, away from him? Would that be a lie? Yes.
“I don’t like it when you lie to me” Dabi used to say. “I can tell when you’re lying baby.. I hate liars”
***
“Two more weeks” the guard said, not turning to look at the prisoner. “The boss said we are at the last steps of preparation. We will finally get you out of here, sir”
Dabi nodded, exhaling the smoke of cigarette. “I am a patient man”
The guard continued. “One of our men informed me that the girl had called the prison yesterday, asking how the visiting hours worked in here”
Dabi quirked a brow, slowly turning his head towards the guard outside of his door. A grin creeped up his face, his eyes widening in pure thrill. “Is that so? Haa, m’getting excited now, seems like the little angel indeed misses me a lot”
He stood up, heading towards the door and peeking through the small window.
“Let me know as soon as she decides to come and visit. Must look decent in front of ‘er”
The guard chuckled.
“Of course, sir”
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🏷️ tags: @hunajan @touyalove @murderous-snail @syrenkitsune @baby-tini
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