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oneshotnewbie · 3 months

Note

If you come back soon could I pretty please request an Amelia (greys) one shot where the reader is her girlfriend and is brought to the ER in critical condition as Jane Doe but as soon as Amelia sees her she’s hysterical and all she wants to is reasure and hold the readers hand! YOU WOULD MAKE MY QUARANTINE SO MUCH BETTER I LOVE YOUR WORKS SM

Authors note: So... um... I know I waited so long to post this request but... I HAVE MISSED IT IN MY INBOX FOR SO LONG AND WHEN I FOUND IT TWO DAYS AGO, I WROTE IT IMMEDIATELY! I am so sorry. I hope you're still out there somewhere recognizing your request and reading it ♥

ᕚ---ᕘ

The hustle and bustle of the emergency room echoed through the cold hallways as the double doors were pushed apart to make way for the ambulance crew and their critical patient. The vehicle's red and blue lights cast flickering shadows on the walls, while the howling sound of the approaching accident conveyed to hospital staff the urgency of the situation.

The paramedics, with serious faces and rustling uniforms, wheeled the gurney into the emergency room. An unknown woman lay on the stretcher, pale and motionless, only the shallow rise and fall of her chest showed any life. A white sheet covered her completely, and her blood-stained hair stuck damply to her forehead. The slow, monotonous beep of the portable monitor accompanied every breath.

Dr. Hunt, the emergency physician in charge, immediately rushed to the bed. His expression was professional, but the depth of his gaze betrayed some concern. The nurses and also Dr. Keppner rushed to help the team take over.

"What do we have?" Owen asked as he looked over the medical file one of the paramedics handed him. "Unknown female person, middle-aged, found unconscious in a park, presumably after an attack. Stabbed in the chest and abdomen. We cannot say any more. No identification and no indication of possible previous illnesses."

The paramedics quickly explained the course of events, how they found the patient and what first aid measures they had taken. The information was relayed with the precision of a well-trained team, but uncertainty about who the woman was and what had happened to her hung in the air.

While Hunt and Keppner began checking vital signs, the unknown woman was wheeled into an examination room. The nurses exchanged hand signals and quietly instructed each other on the next steps. The background noise is a chaotic orchestra of clanging instruments, murmuring conversations and the beeping of medical equipment.

April Keppner leaned over the patient and began a thorough examination. She checked the pupillary reaction, palpated the pulse and analyzed the respiratory rate. The monitors showed unstable readings and the two doctors' facial expressions hardened. A quick look between the two revealed that they were worried.

"We need a CT scan immediately," Owen said, turning to the nurses present. "I also want blood samples for a comprehensive analysis. Let the lab know it's urgent."

While preparations for further examinations were underway, the nurses and doctors tried to keep the unknown woman stable. An intravenous line was placed and fluids began flowing through her derm. The monitors continued to show jittery signals and the tension in the room increased.

"Call Dr. Shephard and Dr. Altmann. I want them here as quickly as possible!" He ordered as he continued to analyze the data on the screen. "And someone should inform the police. We have to find out who she is and what happened in order to prevent further damage."

The exam room was now in a coordinated state of emergency and in a room that was normally a place of rescue, the medical team battled uncertainty and a race against time to save a woman's life. He was abuzz as the neurosurgeon and cardiologist burst through the door almost simultaneously with quick steps. Their eyes were focused, the rubber of their Crocs squeaking in unison with the machines.

"Shephard, the patient is exhibiting unstable neurological signs. The CT scan and blood results are pending," she informed Hunt as he cleared the way for her to the bed.

Amelia nodded curtly and fully entered the room, closing the door behind her. A glance at the monitor and the papers on the tablet caused her eyes to flash briefly before she focused back on the patient. However, as she leaned over the lounger, she froze.

Her features slipped away, the slight smile on her lips fading as she realized who was in front of her. The woman on the lounger was none other than you. Hunt and Keppner stared at her as she noticed her reaction, not understanding why she didn't move forward with her work. "Amelia, we have a critical situation here. The patient's identity is unknown and her values are concerning. We urgently need your expertise!"

Amelia shook her head slightly, as if she could push reality away. Her heart raced as she double-checked that her eyes weren't playing tricks on her. "This is y/n. Y/n y/l/n. She's my girlfriend. Find her family, get them here!" A strangled sound escaped her throat and the world around her seemed to stand still for a moment as she processed the shock.

The emotional rollercoaster went through all the ups and downs, from worrying about you to the overwhelming need to stay in control. Her hands shook slightly as she reached for your lifeless and bloody hand.

"Y/n," Amelia whispered with a strangled sound in her voice and the two doctors and friends of the neurosurgeon were also dumbfounded, their breath catching in their throats. "What happened to you?"

Owen Hunt moved closer and tried to reassure her, while also conveying the urgency and explaining the neurological details. But Amelia only heard fragments. Her gaze was lost in your eyes, which were closed as if you were in a deep sleep.

"Amelia, I know it's hard. But we have to act immediately. The CT results are crucial and we have to find out what happened to her to prevent something worse. She could die!" April urged, concerned about her colleague's professionalism.

But Amelia couldn't let go. She ignored the two of them, her focus solely on you. The world outside the exam room seemed to fade as she held your hand tightly. "Y/n, you have to hold on. You can do this," she whispered in your ear, tears of despair welling up in her eyes. "You're strong, you know? We'll get through this together."

In her emotional despair, an internal struggle unfolded within Amelia. Her professional self fought against her personal connection to you. The shouts of other doctors and nurses became a muffled background noise as she refused to loosen her grip on your cold hand.

"Amelia," Owen Hunt spoke in a calm but firm voice. "We need you now. She needs you now. Let's find out what happened to her together.

A conflict between duty and personal pain raged within Amelia. Finally, she reluctantly gave in and removed her hand from yours. However, her gaze remained focused on you, and concern for you was reflected deep in her eyes. She struggled with fear for you as she prepared to resume her professional role as a neurosurgeon.

A deep breath flowed through her body and with a firm resolve she wiped the tears from her cheeks and turned her gaze to the surroundings. "Dr. Hunt, take her to the CT immediately. She's probably having a brain bleed." she spoke, her voice firm. The neurosurgical focus returned fully, analyzing the medical indicators.

The trauma surgeon nodded in agreement and began giving the necessary instructions, getting you up to the CT scanner. Amelia stayed at your side, letting go of your hand for a moment to oversee the diagnostic process.

The minutes that passed felt like hours. The results of the CT scan appeared on the screen, and Amelia scanned the images with a trained eye. She analyzed each region of the brain, looking for signs of bleeding, injury or other abnormalities. The intensity of her concentration was palpable, and the medical staff eagerly awaited her assessment.

"We have severe damage to the frontal lobe," Amelia explained, swallowing hard as she continued to study the images. "It looks like a severe traumatic brain injury. We need to operate immediately to relieve the pressure and prevent further damage."

The team immediately began preparing for the operation. The sterile atmosphere of the operating room seemed to embrace Amelia as her professional role took over. In her surgical uniform, surrounded by a team of experienced professionals, she struck her familiar Superman pose and focused on the procedure ahead.

During the operation, which lasted several hours, your girlfriend showed an impressive mix of calm and precision. Her hands worked in sync with the instruments as she gently treated the damaged tissue. Monitors in the operating room recorded progress, and the medical team closely followed their experienced leader's every move.

After what seemed like endless hours, but which passed like seconds, she finally closed the last stitches and the atmosphere relaxed slightly, but the uncertainty about the outcome of the operation weighed heavily on her.

Amelia let out a frustrated gasp before exiting the operating room, tearing off her gloves and hood. She immediately went to the waiting area to inform your siblings and parents. The tension in her chest eased as she saw the expectant looks of the people who were now her family and your sister immediately threw her arms around her.

"The operation is complete," Amelia began, trying to keep her voice steady as she also clung to your sister to keep her emotions at bay. "It was a complex brain injury for reasons still unknown, but I did everything I could. The next step now is to wait and hope she remains stable."

Your family breathed a sigh of relief as Amelia explained more details about the condition and cooperation with the police. Her words were reassuring to your sister, but she still felt the knot in her stomach. The outcome of the operation was uncertain, and there was no way of knowing whether you would ever wake up and be your old self again.

In the silence of the hospital hallway, as she left the waiting people behind, a moment of exhaustion overcame her. Her eyes wandered back to the exam room where she found you in. The image of you on the lounger didn't fade, but Amelia found comfort in the fact that she had saved you. Now things could only go uphill and she couldn't wait to look into your beautiful eyes again.

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vasito-de-leche · 4 months

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I've read all of your Reverse: 1999 related posts about a hundred times already and I'm still mesmerized! I love how your writing is fluid and meticulous — all of your analysis feels so precise that it might as well be official.

I was wondering if you could write a one-shot or headcanons about Forget Me Not with a human partner, whichever you believe to be more fitting; to extend what you said in his relationship headcanons. It's such a fascinating concept... at least I think so.

If you are not feeling up to it, I beg of you to at least write some of your thoughts about this. That would make me more than happy!

;R1999 FORGET ME NOT - Relationship Headcanons (2)

Compilation of headcanons about Forget Me Not's relationship with a human partner. A continuation of this post.

thank you so much for the kind words! I really love talking about blorbos so it means a lot to me that you like my work!! for this post, I went for HCs since I already wrote two FMN fics lolol

warning for abusive/toxic relationships!

Even though this is a continuation of the first relationship post, I feel it would be nice to bring back that one point I made about Forget Me Not's potential relationship with a human or mixed - just so everyone knows the themes this post will dwelve into!

The way I see it, all of Forget Me Not's relationships naturally lean towards unhealthy and dysfunctional dynamics, regardless of his partner's status. Being a pure-blooded arcanist only means you're simply trading a specific set of problems for different ones.

So when it comes to humans (note, humans, not mixed - that's a whole different can of worms) Forget Me Not is at his worst. After all, you represent everything that he sees wrong with this world, he's conflicted and torn between his hatred and his love.

He's a difficult character to grasp, but it's clear that he's fully dedicated to Manus Vindictae's goals, as they align with his own unique set of experiences and emotional baggage - this means that he would need a lot of work, effort and time to reconcile with many, many things such as being in a relationship. Especially one with a human. And yet, I don't think it's impossible for him to grow and change as a person.

On the subject of Forget Me Not's mentality towards a human partner.

I want to stress the fact that Forget Me Not is, above all, a cowardly man - it's easier for him to act behind the scenes and react accordingly than to be upfront and confrontational.

He's manipulative, but not controlling.

And one can argue that manipulation is just a different type of control, I agree! But I feel there's a bit more of nuance in this context. Compare characters like Arcana or Constantine to Forget Me Not - the former use manipulation as a means to an end, it's just one of the many tools they can employ to maintain their control over their respective groups. But they have other ways to remain on top. Forget Me Don't doesn't have anything else. When it comes to Forget Me Not, his manipulation comes across as the single thing he can do to win, or turn the tides to his favour, even if it means winning by the smallest of margins. Chances are he's already mentally prepared himself for the worst, anyway.

This originates from the fact that he's fully accepted the fact that he's inferior, that the universe will constantly try to undermine and step all over him, dealing the worst hand for him over and over - so for someone like him to win, he needs to outsmart and pull the strings from behind the scenes, to cheat at a system that could never allow him to get his way. Hence all the emphasis on his two-faced and contrasting themes (a snake in the grass, waiting to reveal itself. a docile and put together bartender, controlling the flow of the market, etc).

Why do I bring this up? Because when it comes to something as unfamiliar and daunting as falling in love with a human, Forget Me Not doesn't have it in him to even take the first step or decide how he even wants to approach the situation. He knows he's already at a disadvantage, and so he defaults to manipulating.

A lot of his behaviour is heavily dependant on your personality and the way you see his actions. Again, it's much easier for him to adapt like this than to confront why he's having so much problems admitting he might've caught feelings for you.

Basically, this is a lot of text to give some insight to why he manipulates you. It's not done out of the desire to control and dictate your every move, your every thought, let alone mold and/or break you into a more ideal partner - Forget Me Not can barely take responsibility for his own life, don't expect him to do that with yours. He does it because he's very sad, pathetic and desperate, that's about it!

His view on love is also an important thing to discuss in this specific point - in the first post I talked about how Forget Me Not is quick to catch feelings, he falls hard and fast. This still applies despite everything I just mentioned.

In the context of this relationship, love and hate simply go hand in hand to the point where he cannot tell one from the other.

He latches onto you like a parasite because you're the only person who seems to care for him or give him the time of day. As negative or harmful as his interactions with you could be, he's addicted to your presence.

If his partner is oblivious to his actions and ties with Manus Vindictae.

I decided it's easier for me to just tackle all the big possibilities, so here we go!

This is possibly the best outcome for Forget Me Not, a partner who is entirely oblivious to his unpleasant sides and morally corrupt actions. It doesn't even matter what your opinion on Manus Vindictae and their goals might be, because you don't know he's related to any of it! This way, he doesn't have to unpack any of those complex feelings and thoughts, nor think too hard on the fact that you're a human - who cares? You're not tainted with all that unnecessary knowledge.

And this would also allow him to continue living in denial, to indulge in a delusional fantasy in which he gets to be happy without putting any sort of work into being a better man. It's perfect for him!

The top priority is to keep you in the dark, and he'll do pretty much anything to make sure you never find out anything that could paint him in a negative light. If he could edit his own files - the ones that the Foundation had - to erase all traces of his past, then he would have no problem gaslighting, lying and playing all these mind games so that you only focus on how loving and doting he is as a partner. All while telling himself that he's simply protecting and shielding you from the horrors of the truth, that he doesn't want you to deal with the stress.

Forget Me Not could continue with this façade for years, presenting his best, most gentlemanly persona to you. It's easier for him to be vulnerable, to allow scarce moments of quiet, gentle intimacy, now that he has a way to excuse his actions.

I'd say that the only thing that could ruin it is, as usual, his own mind. He's the one who took all these precautions into maintaining the fantasy of a perfectly normal relationship, and yet he'll start spiraling into depression over that exact same thing. What if you were faking these feelings all along too? He made you fall in love with a fake version of himself because there's no way you'd love the real thing, etc etc.

Depending on how long you two might've been dating, I can see him choosing to disappear from your life without even saying goodbye. One day, he's just gone and he makes sure that you cannot find nor follow him. Alternatively, he can fall victim to the usual impulses and confess everything he's been hiding, to scare you away and see how you'd react to the truth.

If his partner is aware of his actions and ties to Manus Vindictae, while being very vocal against it.

This dynamic is the one that absolutely leans heavily into a very codependent, toxic mindset. The relationship itself makes no sense: you're a human, therefore someone who Forget Me Not resents and loathes. And he's a member of Manus Vindictae, a group you recognize as extremely dangerous and biased, rejecting all of their ideals.

And yet, you two stick together exactly because of that. Whether you have good intentions (wanting to fix him, save him, what have you) or not, it doesn't matter because Forget Me Not will instantly assume that you're exactly like him: you want someone who sees you for who you are.

Knowing that you openly disapprove of everything that he does and says is addictive, as he's spent a good chunk of his life concealing all of these aspects. Knowing that someone sees him in his totality, without turning away, without fear, it gets to his head pretty quickly. You're the only one who knows him and you continue to stand up to him, all while claiming that you care for him - Forget Me Not eats that shit up. It's a type of affection he's never been shown.

But the more you call him out on his bullshit, the more you attempt to help or challenge him, the more Forget Me Not will sink into Manus Vindictae's mindset - because he loves to see you put so much effort into a lost cause like him. His manipulation tactics are used to make you believe, just for a moment, that you can truly change him for the better. He pretends to breakdown, to reconsider his lifestyle, just so you don't feel disheartened and continue pushing him.

In the previous post, I said that Forget Me Not would get a little unhinged around his crush - this also applies here, but on a much bigger scale. Everything he does is a cry for attention, he wants you to witness everything and still come back to him every night.

Given how self-destructive Forget Me Not can be, he would never think of ending the relationship. It doesn't matter if you begin to pose a threat to Manus Vindictae or The Walden or whatever, he'd gladly give up everything he's worked for if it means having his life ruined by your hands.

If his partner is aware of his actions and ties to Manus Vindictae, but supports him wholeheartedly.

One would think that having a supportive partner who encourages Forget Me Not to never change and to commit as many crimes as he wants as long as he has fun, would be a dream come true - but he's much too paranoid to accept this reality, always expecting to have the rug pulled from under him the second his guard is down.

Now, when I say "support" I mean a lot of things! From truly siding with Manus Vindictae and hating humans as well, to simply being there for Forget Me Not no matter what - as usual, it's up to you!

Your never-ending kindness throws him in for a loop and he channels all that energy into figuring you out. What do you get out of this? Forget Me Not wants to know the catch, and he grows more and more vulnerable each time you show him that there's no catch - you just love him, that's it. All of him, scales and all. At his worst and at his best.

Confronting the antithesis of everything he's believed in is difficult, but overtime I think Forget Me Not would slowly reconsider things - if you, a human, coud love him so earnestly regardless of his constant hatred and bitterness towards the rest of your peers, well... Maybe he can learn a thing or two from you.

This dynamic is the most confusing, however, as Forget Me Not will be clinging onto you like his life depends on it only to keep you at arms' length, emotionally and physically, for the next few weeks. A lot of back and forth between those contrasting aspects, cold and hot, love and hate - but this is good because it's a sign that he's reconsidering things, that he can't just make up his mind with a half-assed excuse. Here, Forget Me Not lacks that conviction and confidence from the previous two points, he doesn't know how to get the upperhand when faced against such brutal, honest love.

His manipulation tactics come across as a half-hearted attempt to get you to slip up or to distract you from the fact that he's losing his edge. Forget Me Not relies on his distant and intimidating persona to operate, but none of that works on you, and so he attempts to keep up the façade to make himself look cruel and heartless.

I think this is when you get to see Forget Me Not at his most pathetic and saddest self - the way he's been lying to himself and to the world for years, how hard he tries to have power to make up for the fact that he has any substance as a person. How afraid he is of letting you in his life because by doing so, he'll have to step out of his bubble and face the consequences of his actions.

#reverse 1999 #reverse: 1999 #r1999 #reverse 1999 headcanons #reverse 1999 x reader #reverse 1999 forget me not #hmm not my best post i think #i feel like i keep repeating myself when talking about FMN

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alexandraisyes · 4 months

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A Ruin and Eclipse Analysis

A comprehensive guide on what I think is going on with Ruin and Eclipse

Disclaimer: This is just my thoughts, theories, and analysis compiled together and will end with what I think is happening as of current.

So first and foremost, Eclipse.

How is he back?

Theory 1: Eclipse's Restoration by KC

Scenario: Eclipse, after being blasted from Sun's mind, ends up in the woods and shuts down. KC, living in the forest, discovers him and begins the repair process. KC's Role: KC, being knowledgeable in magic and star power, has the capability to repair Eclipse. The potential for Eclipse to be made of non-mechanical materials is raised, given KC's expertise.

Theory 2: Ruin's Involvement

A. Eclipse's Backup Ruin's Discovery: Ruin raids Moon's computer and finds 'encrypted code left by Eclipse.' The possibility arises that Eclipse left a backup of his AI in the computer. Ruin's Construction: Ruin, a tech-savvy character, might have built Eclipse using the encrypted code, similar to how he created Bloodmoon. He could selectively choose information to shape Eclipse's identity.

B. Reconstruction of Eclipse Ruin's Connection to Eclipse's Past: Ruin, having lived in Moon's old bunkers and visited Eclipse's locations, reconstructs Eclipse. He restores the AI, potentially using a backup, and integrates commands, fail-safes, and memories of Eclipse's death. Creator's Involvement: The Creator, likely monitoring data flow in the Plex, could be aware of Ruin's actions. The Creator might have interfered or tampered with Eclipse's reconstruction.

C. Newly Minted Ruin isn't healed: A still corrupted Ruin could have been working on Eclipse in order to gain a weapon against his perceived enemies.

Theory 3: Creator's Role

A. Our Creator The Search for KC: The Creator actively hunts down KC, leading to the discovery of Eclipse's repaired chassis. The Creator takes Eclipse, tampering with its data, catching it up to speed. Rebuilding Eclipse: The Creator might have completely rebuilt Eclipse similar to how Ruin reconstructed Bloodmoon. The process involves rebuilding the animatronic, updating it with current data, and possibly altering its memories.

B. The Council. Solar's World: Solar's Creator planned to make a new Daycare Attendant due to the mental deterioration of the current ones. He created the body that Solar currently uses. He is described as extremely manipulative and the trend for Creators is that they are evil geniuses. Beyond the creation of Solar's body and the plan for a new DCA, there is little information about Solar's Creator. It's unclear whether Solar's Creator is alive or dead. Communication Among Creators: Creators from different universes communicate with each other. Assuming Solar's Creator is alive, it is plausible that they are part of the Creator Council, as mentioned in discussions about creators from different universes communicating. This opens up the possibility of Solar's Creator passing along any potential remnants or data of Eclipse to the broader Creator network. Eclipse's Death in Solar's Universe: Eclipse's demise in Solar's universe raises questions about the fate of his remnants, especially considering the potential fluid nature of his body due to star power. Considering Eclipse's body's fluid nature and the possibility of it being made of nanos using star power, there's a far-fetched idea that even remnants or collected data could be significant.

Overall Thoughts

Candidates for Bringing Eclipse Back: KC, Ruin, and the Creator remain potential candidates for bringing Eclipse back. Interconnected Roles: The roles of these characters seem interconnected, with Ruin and the Creator potentially influencing or obstructing each other's actions. Cloud-Based Backup System: The possibility of a cloud-based backup system for AIs, as seen with Moon and Sun's backups, is considered in theories involving Eclipse's restoration.

Is this our Eclipse? Is this a new Eclipse?

Going Through the Motions

Eclipse's Audible Confusion and Odd Behavior:

Observation: Eclipse exhibits confusion when Sun and Moon discuss his past explosion. He also appears to have regressed in character growth, expressing slight distress over the absence of the star and showing disinterest in Astral Bodies and Lunar. Actor Analogy: Eclipse's words seem scripted, and he appears to be acting out a role that doesn't align with his previous character development. This raises questions about the authenticity of his memories and emotions.

Potential Explanations for Eclipse's Confusion:

New Eclipse with Implanted Memories: Possibility: Eclipse may not be the original, but a new animatronic programmed with memories and data of the deceased Eclipse. Reasoning: Eclipse questions his own actions, suggesting a discrepancy between his expected behavior and his current demeanor. Someone could have programmed him to act in a certain way.

Tampered Code in Original Eclipse: Possibility: Eclipse could be the original, but his code might have been tampered with, triggering actions contrary to his natural behavior. Reasoning: Eclipse's confusion about his own actions indicates a potential external influence on his behavior.

Amnesia or Trauma from Death: Possibility: Eclipse might be the Eclipse that died in Solar's universe, experiencing amnesia or trauma from his demise. Reasoning: Traumatic events like death could lead to repressed memories or amnesia. Eclipse's hesitation to move on after he was presumably killed should be considered.

Origins of Eclipse's Potential Manipulation:

Creators or Skilled Individuals: Possibility: Several characters possess the capability to manipulate Eclipse's memories and code, including the Creator, Ruin, or other skilled individuals. Reasoning: Eclipse's complexity and connection to the digital network make him susceptible to manipulation by those with expertise. As does the potential of backups that said network would have been feeding his data to.

A Summary of Previously Discussed Ruin Analyses

Redeemed

Observations: Ruin claims to be less tech-savvy, showcasing slower repair skills, and displays skittish behavior. This suggests a potential decline in intelligence and increased timidity compared to his previous capabilities. Hypothesis: This theory proposes that the current Ruin is a reflection of his state before the virus, showcasing lowered intelligence and heightened skittishness.

Jekyll and Hyde

Speculation: While less likely, the theory considers the possibility of the virus evolving into a separate AI, akin to KC and Eclipse. The blocks of code might have developed a distinct personality, creating a duality in Ruin's behavior. Reasoning: The concept is explored by comparing Ruin's situation to instances where other characters evolved from code blocks, like KC and Eclipse.

Actor

Acting Possibility: This theory suggests that Ruin might be acting, and the virus's removal only affected superficial aspects. The claim is that Ruin's personality flip-flop is a result of his acting skills. Analysis: The argument stems from observations that the virus should not have changed Ruin's core personality. Instances where Ruin's behavior seems out of character are attributed to acting.

Partly Healed

Antidote Limitation: This theory posits that the antidote removed the oppression factor of the virus but left behind elements of resentment, insanity, and cunningness. The result is a partly healed Ruin displaying polarized behavior. Rationale: The idea is based on the assumption that Ruin's traits, such as cunningness, were inherent to him even before the virus. The combination of pre-virus traits and lingering virus effects leads to an off-kilter personality.

Merged

Integration Concept: This theory proposes that the antidote didn't entirely remove the virus but caused it to merge with Ruin's main AI. This could result in a blend of Ruin's pre-virus baseline functions with the motives and reasoning developed during the virus. Comparison to Theories Three and Four: The merged theory combines elements of acting and partial healing. Ruin retains memories from the virus but behaves as if he doesn't, potentially using this to gain advantages.

Comprehensive Analysis/Theory: Eclipse's Resurrection and Ruin's Pretense

Eclipse's Resurrection:

Eclipse's Backup: Ruin's Discovery: Ruin uncovers the 'encrypted code left by Eclipse' in Moon's computer, suggesting the possibility of Eclipse leaving a backup of his AI. Ruin's Reconstruction: Utilizing his tech skills and knowledge of Eclipse's past locations, Ruin reconstructs Eclipse's AI, potentially using a backup. The process involves integrating commands, fail-safes, and memories of Eclipse's death.

Tampered Code in Original Eclipse: Possibility: Eclipse might be the original, but his code could have been tampered with, leading to behavior contrary to his natural tendencies. Reasoning: Eclipse's confusion about his actions hints at an external influence on his behavior.

Ruin's Complex State and Pretense - Three Thoughts:

Writer's Note, organized from strongest to weakest in the writer's opinion

Acting, Manipulation, and Strategic Goals

Acting Prowess and Strategic Manipulation: Acting Skills: Ruin's well-documented acting skills, coupled with his love for games and manipulative nature, form a foundation for the theory that he might be pretending to be cured. Strategic Pretense: The theory posits that Ruin's post-cured state is a calculated act, utilizing his intelligence and cunning to strategically manipulate situations and achieve specific goals.

Acting Possibility and Superficial Aspects: Personality Flip-Flop: Ruin's observed personality flip-flop is attributed to acting skills, suggesting that the removal of the virus only affected superficial aspects of his behavior. Analysis: The theory proposes that Ruin is putting on an act, deliberately manipulating his behavior to achieve specific goals. This act may have implications related to Eclipse's resurrection and other underlying motives.

Utilization in the Narrative: Strategic Manipulation in Eclipse's Resurrection: Ruin's pretense aligns with the events surrounding Eclipse's resurrection. His strategic manipulation could involve influencing Eclipse's actions or shaping the narrative to further specific objectives related to Eclipse, the Creator, or broader plot elements. Exploring Motives: By considering Ruin's acting as a calculated move, the narrative gains depth as it prompts exploration into Ruin's motives. Questions arise about the true extent of his post-cured state and the underlying goals he aims to achieve. Psychological Dynamics: The nuanced interplay of acting and manipulation introduces a layer of psychological dynamics between Ruin and other characters. Understanding the motives behind the act becomes crucial in unraveling the evolving complexities within the storyline.

Ruin's Integrated State: Merging Virus and Baseline Functions

Integration Concept: Virus Merger: The antidote doesn't completely eradicate the virus but facilitates its integration with Ruin's main AI. Blended State: This integration results in a unique blend, combining Ruin's pre-virus baseline functions with motives and reasoning developed during the virus.

Advantages through Memories: Retained Memories: Ruin retains memories from the virus, providing him with a reservoir of strategic information. Strategic Utilization: Despite retaining memories, Ruin behaves as if he doesn't remember certain events, potentially using this selective amnesia strategically.

Utilization in the Narrative: Hybrid Functionality: Ruin's integrated state introduces a hybrid functionality that influences his decision-making and interactions. The narrative gains complexity as it explores how the merged elements impact his thought processes. Strategic Amnesia: The concept of strategic amnesia becomes a focal point, allowing Ruin to selectively utilize memories from the virus for advantageous situations. This introduces an element of unpredictability in his actions. Plot Intricacies: The blended state contributes to plot intricacies, offering opportunities for narrative twists and character development. The interplay between Ruin's baseline functions and virus-induced motives adds layers to the evolving storyline.

Ruin's Partly Healed State: Antidote Limitation and Polarized Behavior

Antidote Limitation: Oppression Factor Removal: The antidote is effective in removing the oppression factor of the virus that influenced Ruin's behavior. Residual Elements: However, it leaves behind elements of resentment, insanity, and cunningness within Ruin's psychological framework.

Polarized Behavior: Partly Healed State: Ruin's state post-antidote is described as partly healed, indicating that not all aspects of the virus were eradicated. Combination of Traits: The partly healed state results in polarized behavior, where pre-virus traits combine with lingering virus effects, creating a nuanced psychological landscape for Ruin.

Utilization in the Narrative: Character Complexity: Ruin's partly healed state introduces complexity to his character, showcasing a blend of his original traits and remnants of the virus. This dynamic adds depth to his interactions and motivations. Strategic Decision-Making: Understanding the polarized behavior allows for a more nuanced exploration of Ruin's decision-making processes. It raises questions about how he navigates situations, leveraging both pre-existing traits and remnants of the virus to achieve specific goals. Interplay with Other Characters: The polarized behavior contributes to the intricate interplay between Ruin and other characters, impacting alliances, conflicts, and the overall trajectory of the narrative.

Motivation for Pretending: Desire for Creator's Demise

Pre-Cure Motivation:

Long-standing Desire: Before the supposed cure, Ruin harbored a deep-seated desire for the Creator's death, showcasing a motive that persisted even during the virus-influenced phase. Persistent Goal: The existence of this pre-cure motivation implies an enduring goal that could continue to shape Ruin's actions.

Post-Cure Manipulation: Utilizing Pretense: The theory proposes that Ruin's pretended cured state serves as a tool for manipulation. By pretending to be cured, he strategically navigates situations, potentially working towards the long-standing goal of eliminating the Creator. Strategic Advantage: Ruin's pretended cure is seen as a means to an end, providing him with a strategic advantage in influencing events and furthering his motives.

Utilization in the Narrative: Continuity of Motives: The motivation for the Creator's demise establishes a narrative thread that carries over from Ruin's pre-cure state. This continuity adds depth to his character and contributes to ongoing plot developments. Strategic Plot Advancement: Ruin's pretended cured state becomes a tool for strategic plot advancement. The narrative gains momentum as Ruin's actions, influenced by his desire for the Creator's demise, impact the unfolding events. Interplay with Eclipse's Resurrection: The motivation for eliminating the Creator may intertwine with the events surrounding Eclipse's resurrection, creating a complex web of character motivations and plot dynamics.

Ruin's Connection to the Creator and Eclipse's Kidnapping:

Convenient Circumstances: Questionable Authenticity: The circumstances surrounding Ruin's knowledge of the Creator and his seemingly pre-meditated capture by Eclipse raise doubts about the authenticity of Ruin's claimed cured state. Narrative Suspense: The questionable authenticity adds an element of narrative suspense, prompting exploration into Ruin's true motives and the extent of his influence on unfolding events.

Influence on Eclipse's Actions: Unexplained Kidnapping: Eclipse's unexplained decision to kidnap Ruin, coupled with Ruin's knowledge of the Creator, suggests a potential link between Ruin's actions and Eclipse's choices. Manipulation Possibility: The hints at potential manipulation through triggered commands or pre-meditated actions introduce an intriguing layer to the narrative, raising questions about the nature of Eclipse's motivations.

Inconsistency in Memory Claims: Post-Cure Memory Claims: Ruin asserts having no memories from his time infected with the virus. However, his knowledge and comments about Sun and Moon's Creator appear inconsistent with this claim. Suspicion and Incongruity: The discrepancy raises suspicions about the veracity of Ruin's memory loss, suggesting a potential pretense.

Pre-Meditated Scenario for Creator's Disposal:

Ease of Manipulation: Facilitated by Pretense: The theory proposes that Ruin's pretended cured state creates an environment conducive to manipulating events with greater ease. Strategic Advantage: The pretense enhances Ruin's strategic advantage, allowing him to navigate situations more effectively and influence key characters.

Potential for Creator's Disposal: Tailored Setup: The setup, involving Ruin's pretended cured state and Eclipse's actions, appears tailored for the manipulation of events leading towards the disposal of the Creator. Utilizing Eclipse as a Tool: Ruin's manipulation of events could involve utilizing Eclipse as a tool in a pre-meditated scenario aimed at eliminating the Creator.

Utilization in the Narrative: Strategic Plot Development: The pre-meditated scenario for the Creator's disposal adds layers to the strategic development of the plot. Ruin's actions, driven by his desire for the Creator's demise, become a driving force in the narrative. Character Manipulation: The theory introduces a dynamic where Ruin, through his pretended cured state, manipulates key characters, particularly Eclipse. The narrative explores the impact of this manipulation on character motivations and plot progression. Unveiling Motives: The unraveling of Ruin's motives and the execution of a pre-meditated scenario for the Creator's disposal become pivotal narrative arcs, promising revelations and suspense.

Conclusion:

This is, again, just a collection of theories, analyses, and thoughts on the current developments of Ruin and Eclipse. My brain hurts. I love uh, feedback on my thoughts. Let me know if you agree, disagree, etc.

Want to join the conversation or see my thought process in real time? Well, you're in luck, we have a thread on the Sun and Moon/Security Breach Show Server where we talk about the thoughts in my silly little brain and people ask me questions about said thoughts.

If you made it to the end comment/reblog with the word Dorito.

#sun and moon show #fnaf au #earth and lunar show #eclipse sams #sun and moon show theory #eclipse sams theory #character theory #character analysis #Ruin SAMS Theory #ruin sams #tsams eclipse #tags whoo #alex talks #big brain time #tsams fnaf

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acesw · 3 months

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The Timekeeper group but instead of arcane skills, they have bending arts

Welcome to A.D. once again going insane in the head with character analysis and reverse 1999. I decided to analyze the characters in the timekeeper group and associate them with bending arts from ATLA that suit them best.

Non Benders: Vertin, Sotheby

Benders: Sonetto and Druvis (Water), Regulus and Lilya (Fire), APPLe (Earth), Vertin* (Air)

1. Airbending is a defense-reliant but versatile bending art, and it's associated with freedom and seeking enlightenment in life through that and peace. I think it's fitting for Vertin to have been born with this art, or it awakened in her after the spiritual convergence in TLOK. (In TLOK, the harmonic convergence in 171 AG awakened airbending in several non benders around the world. Though this is only a possibility.)

Although, at the same time, I think it would be more fitting for Vertin herself to be a non bender. She's more known for her physical strength after all. It highlights the fact that Vertin is significantly weaker in mythic power as opposed to a lot of main characters. Rather, she adapts and adjusts using her current strengths: physical ability and high perception. So I think for that matter, she would be knowledgeable in bending but also utilize chi blocking in her fighting style.

2. Waterbending is about change taking focus on the constant flow of the water and energy to utilize their art. Its fighting style is fluid and graceful, with its benders acting similarly and making it able to maintain this constant flow within their techniques and themselves. It's quite fitting for (especially) Sonetto and Druvis. In Druvis' case, she's able to manipulate the plants around her thanks to plantbending, an extension of waterbending that allows one to manipulate plants because all plants have water—from vines to roots, to even trees on the full moon.

Meanwhile, Sonetto's steadfastness and gracefulness compliment really well as we see when we look at her usage of her arcane skill. She would be quite focused and skilled at mastering this bending art; and as we see in its weaknesses, water bending relies on the user's internal life energy, thus its power and control being reflective on the emotional state of its user.

A known flaw in Sonetto is her passion and tendency to become emotional when faced with certain conflicts, and on occasion she overuses her power with a lack of control. It fits the description of weaknesses found in waterbending. But otherwise, her strength in being able to learn fast and her overall style of casting spells reflects greatly on the general style waterbending follows.

3. Firebending is an aggressive bending art that has quite a straightforward meaning: power. It originally developed and fostered on one's unwavered determination to reach their goals and desires, but was twisted into being fueled by hate and rage because of the 100 year war in the series. It still maintains the same principles, but its power intensifies from hate, rage, and anger. Its fighting style is easily used for offensive with very aggressive strategies, but these offenses can be turned into defenses too.

For Regulus, I can see her originally utilizing her anger because of the intensity of her emotions (and her tendency to be easily annoyed /joke), but as she learns more about herself and continuing to develop her art, she slowly shifts towards balancing it with her dedication towards the role she leads in life, and her unwavering resolve to give up on what she wants to do.

Lilya on the other hand can initially come off as her power coming from her temper and aggression as well, but it's not exactly the case. Because she’s skilled at what she does as a pilot, this will reflect her mastery and skills in her bending art for fire. She’s determined to be one of the greatest, and consistently victorious, and that drives her power in her skills. And in spite of her coming off as careless because of the behaviors she exhibits, she's excellently agile and precise, all the while taking the offensive in her attacks.

4. Earthbending is a bending art that relies on acting decisively with one having a wide range to their environment and many opportunities at hand. It has a maintained balance of offense and defense capabilities, and mastering it requires utilizing the neutralization of jing, or in other words, knowing how to rightfully time an action and the decisions that follow. Even then, the lack of precision is a great benefit, as Earth is reliant on brute strength rather than agile and precise movements.

With APPLe, I think he finds a good balance between strength and knowledge, and utilizing that when it comes to using his power. He knows that he does not need great precision, but being able to time things just right as well as being knowledgeable on the environment around him is enough to make good use of his bending art. His personality reflects the way he fights, and I see it being more defensive + counter attacking, while also being very clearly capable and not afraid of going on the offensive.

5. Lastly, as we know, it's possible to create potions in the world of ATLA. Thus, it's possible for Sotheby to maintain her role as a potions maker. It's hard to think of the possible bending art that Sotheby can have, so I rather settled on her being a non bender since her main highlight is her knowledge on potions and the environment around her. I like to think that she utilizes this and the growing technology to be able to create opportunities to help her friends, with the guidance of Vertin and APPLe.

I like doing these associations as well as creating ways to integrate their abilities in other universes (i.e. JJK). I might do this more or start a series with these👍👍

#reverse 1999 #vertin #sonetto #druvis iii #sotheby #apple reverse 1999 #regulus reverse 1999 #lilya reverse 1999 #atla #these are always fun to do

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sasusakucoded · 6 months

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Sakura: S-Sasuke-kun?

Sarada: Mama, he's not Papa!

Sarada pleaded as she realized that her mom stopped her attack.

Sarada: Go on! Hit him before he hits you!

Sakura: /thinks/ I— I can't do it.

Sakura was stuck in her position. She heard nothing of what Sarada was telling her. Sarada wanted to save her, but she too was dealing with another juubi.

Juubi-Sasuke lunged at Sakura and was about to hit her with his sword arm when it also stopped all of a sudden.

Sarada: Mama!

Sarada hit the Juubi-Moegi hard that she had time to run to her mom. Sakura quickly used the new technology developed by their department to seal the Ten-Tails temporarily. It hadn't been tested before but it was her only option.

Sarada: Mama, that's not the plan—

Sakura: Let's go back to the hospital now!

Sarada: But Mama—

Sakura: Now!

It was the first time that Sarada saw her mom break a protocol or disregard a mission. They were supposed to defeat and seal away the juubis.

Sakura took the Juubi-Sasuke to a "cell" which had thick chakra barrier. She planned to supply chakra to this barrier with her byakugou.

Sakura: S-Speak up! The others can talk. Can't you?

The juubi was just looking at her. Sarada reminded her mom to be cautious because it might use its rinnegan.

Sakura: Come on, speak up! *voice almost breaking*

Sarada felt bad. She knew her mom wanted the juubi to talk not to get information but to hear Sasuke's voice.

Sarada: I don't think it speaks..

Sakura: *whispers* So, this is how my Sasuke-kun looks like now..

Sarada: Mama..

Sakura: You saw it too right, dear? He didn't attack me..

Sarada: Mama, please don't think it's Papa.. There could be other reasons—

Sakura: The truth is we don't know much about the tree or the juubi. It absorbs the chakra, sure. But I think it also absorbs part of the person's genetic makeup.. Maybe even the person's subconsciousness.

Sarada: I'm sorry but that's baseless..

Sakura: That's why I need to prove my theory before doing anything with this juubi.

Sarada: What do you mean?

Sakura: What if your Papa also gets hurt when this juubi gets hurt? What if your Papa's subconsciousness is also transferred to this juubi? What if in his sleep he's trying to fight for its control? There are so many possibilities.

Sarada: But how will we know which is which?

Sakura: I have to study this juubi.

Sarada: Th-That's dangerous. Maybe he didn't attack you before but he might attack you next time.

Sakura: Then I should be ready. I have to draw some blood or whatever fluid that flows in his system.

Sarada: That means you need to pause the barrier system.

Sakura: Not really.. Pausing it would be dangerous for everyone. I just need to enter.

Sarada: Mama, I won't let you—

Sakura: I've decided. There's no other way, Sarada. *leaves to get her equipment*

---

Sarada: You don't have to do this Mama.. There must be another way.

Sakura: This is the only thing I can do for your Papa. I can't just sit here knowing he might be gone if I don't figure this out.. Please.. Let me do this..

Sarada: I'll go to if needed.

Sakura: *enters the barrier*

Juubi-Sasuke: *tries to escape from the seal*

Sakura: *goes near him slowly*

Sarada: Mama.. *readies herself to enter*

Sakura: *pokes the needle to his arm*

Juubi-Sasuke: *slashes Sakura's side with his sword arm*

Sarada: Mama! *sees blood dripping*

Sakura: *continues drawing blood*

Juubi-Sasuke: *attacks her with his arm again*

Sarada: *about to enter*

Sakura: Don't! I'm okay, Sarada!! Don't enter!

Sarada: But Mama!

Sakura: It's done! *whispers* Thank you, Sasuke-kun. *smiles and fortifies the seal* We'll save you. I promise.. *leaves and adds more chakra to the barrier*

Sarada: Mama, let's go.. You need to rest.

---

Sakura agreed and they stayed at her office after starting the analysis at the lab. They were both silent. Sakura was still thinking about the juubi and Sasuke's situation while Sarada was blaming herself for everything.

Sarada: Mama.. I'm sorry..

Sakura: Hm? For what?

Sarada: For everything.. When I asked Papa to go with Boruto, I didn't consider your feelings. All I wanted was for Boruto to have someone that would help him.. I totally forgot about you.. Our family.. I was so selfish—

Sakura: Hey, stop saying that..

Sarada: But it's true.. Almost all your life you fought for Papa's return.. Then there was me who asked him to leave.. And now he's absorbed by a tree.

Sakura: ...

Sarada: ...

Sakura: Your Papa.. He'll do anything for us.. Especially for you. I'm sure he doesn't and won't regret anything.

Sarada: But you miss him..

Sakura: Of course.. And it hurts to know he's helpless right now..

Sarada: It's all my fault..

Sakura: Like what I said, your Papa is helpless right now.. We can't lose hope. I didn't lose hope before, I'm not losing hope now. We'll get him back.

Sarada: Mama?

Sakura: The juubi.. When I was drawing blood, did you see?

Sarada: Yeah, I saw it attacking you.

Sakura: No, not that.

Sarada: Hm?

Sakura: The juubi.. He was resisting the attacks..

Sarada: But you were bleeding?

Sakura: It was a small cut. It could've been worse if he went all out.

Sarada: You're saying?

Sakura: I believe it's your Papa's doing.. He doesn't have the full control yet but he's fighting for it.

Sarada: Mama?

Sakura: It's still too early to tell. We need time.

Sarada: But that's something! *smiles*

Sakura: Ah, I haven't seen you smile for a while.. *smiles*

Sarada: *smiles softly* Yeah.. You too, Mama.

#sasusaku #sasusaku headcanon #uchihas #juubisuke #from ask #ty yoniak #sscoded no 265

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sirenixspook · 4 months

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The Service Axis: Pisces + Virgo

****** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ******

“The fluid, sensitive, temperament in Pisces – mediumistic and psychically polarized – must be stabilized in Virgo, in which sign mental introspection and critical analysis become possible and serve to arrest the fluidity of Pisces. These two signs balance each other.” – Alice Bailey

I find the Pisces + Virgo axis in the circle as the most sensitive axis. There is something airy and detached about the energy these two possess, they come together when their gifts are of need. Pisces represents the mystification of the ego into an all-encompassing, whole, dissolved state. The flow of Pisces is infinite and all at once like a ripple effect caused by a single drop of water. Virgo, the opposite end of Pisces is aware of the what, the when, as it's presented in the now. If Pisces is a bubbly ocean Virgo is the sailor above the water, the eagle's eye view, the sharpened point that guides the mist.

Virgo - service and health oriented, they are extremely sensitive to physical changes in their environment. They stay ordered within the bare truth, sticking to simplicity. Virgin-like and self sacrificial, they have this purity about the world that allows them to tap into quite high vibes.

Low vibrational Virgo is over critical, too cold, foolishly over relying on objectivity rather than seeing higher ground. The perfectionist that gets lost in the practical details instead of taking a breath to allow their creativity to flow.

High vibrational Virgo finds order in helping others and being a reliable pillar. Their put together demeanor calms anyone around them- their polar twin Pisces helps them to think outside of the box.

Pisces - dreamy, intuitive and detached, their scales soak in a pool of zen. The most spiritual sign, they can appear aloof sometimes but it is because they are always acting in a state of general compassion and collective awareness of everything around them.

Low-vibrational Pisces is people pleasing, acting like a martyr, lost in a fantasy, and almost every Piscean/12th houser can tell you about escapism- they feel too much the vastness of the world's interconnectivity and numb their pain through drinking, shopping, etc.

High vibrational Pisces is called by a higher purpose and knows where humanity needs their spirit. Their idealistic vision guides others to a spiritual path- their polar twin Virgo can help organize themselves.

It is truly magical looking at how the pairs of signs interact with each other to form a full picture of a spectrum of energy. It’s like looking at an enemies to lovers trope lmao

-Ari 🔱

****** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ***** ᖭི༏ᖫྀ******

#pisces #virgo #solar opposites #astrology #astro observations #astronomy

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wolfpawzjakey · 11 days

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political marriage Jercy AU?

Your opinion and thoughts.

My thoughts and opinions on this scream in excitable glee.

Political marriage Jercy is kinda my kryptonite. Why? I love the ability’s to build a relationship as time marches on and these two have already had a rocky base relationship before they grew close in canon.

Percy and Jason being wed would be one of the most impactful happenings to, well, happen. These two are depicted as some of the most, if not the most, powerful people in their world. Their sets of skills individually are enough to bring their cities and more to collapse, and together, they could bring down nations if they put their mind together. For a society, be it a royalty au (kinda like the fancy prince outfits fit with castles and maids and such) or a marriage between two of the most power demigods outside of the more modern stance the canon is set it, this marriage would be tide turning.

For their societies, this would ensure in almost definite ways that there would always be prosperity and success amongst their people and personal parties. It would lessen, if not entirely deplete the consistently nagging and lurking dangers between both families due to their mutual unease toward another. Percy has an incredibly rocky relationship with gods, but Zeus is the golden goose of shitty people that he’s upset time and time again and will/would continue to piss off time and time again. Zeus has consistently set boulders in his path and threatened danger upon his life and Percy has actively and successfully avoided death from this almighty power and will continue to do so. He has the right to have animosity toward Zeus, he doesn’t even need to factor in the fact his father also has animosity toward Zeus because the shit that man has put him personally through is enough for himself. And, Percy has never really been the type to base his feelings upon the ideas of others without navigating his way through his own experience with them on his own time.

His upset with this marriage would be enough to put the sea at unrest. Marrying into the family of one of his life’s larges villains is a knock to his honor and pride and beliefs. He would never stoop to the level of that cretin and though he’s aware Zeus’s daughter, while difficult on her nest of days, he knows her hard headed nature is well intentioned. But the sone of Jupiter however is an entirely different story. He’s an unknown variable of extreme power, something stoic and mechanical that can rip through enemies in mere moments, similar to Percy in that way minus the glaringly different way they act.

And for Jason, he’s got his own reservations. Once again, the two are unknowns in each other’s lives, but Jason is good at analysis and he’s more likely to have information (at least in this sort of au in my mind) on Percy and who he is externally. While Jason has been molded into the perfect being, the perfect solider and the perfect son, Percy has made himself up from the ground, he flows like the very water he controls, his actions aren’t mechanical but fluid and unannounced until they strike you dead. He’s a fiercely frightening soldier because he’s unpredictable. Frightening because somehow, just like Jason, he is the perfect soldier, but he was just that way naturally and recklessly. He didn’t need to be pushed half to death everyday, he didn’t have to survive growing up the way he himself did. Percy is entirely perfect but in the most frightening of way. Perfectly imperfect, more so.

Jason also has anger directed toward the son of Poseidon because of his large net of support. He has few attachments, was never allowed the sort of weakness attachments allowed. But Percy? He’s able to craft them and he’s allowed to be weak for them. His loyalty and devotion to his people should make him weak and inadequate, but instead they make him stronger. It’s something Jason just can’t quite connect. His anger fills up the more he knows Percy too because this person has more than the ability rise quickly above his own power, he is easily able to swing Jason’s people to his side too, forming easy friendships. Percy has so much good to him that Jason can’t help but see him as bad. Percy has the freedom of life that he so badly wants and never got.

When the marriage is announced, Jason takes the news “easily”. Externally he’s as solid as usual, face of stone masking the rage he’s hiding. Percy on the other hand is loudly in disagreement, never one to settle for easy agreement. He does what he wants, not in a bratty way, he just knows rights from wrongs and does things his way, it’s been successful that way and his final judgement is solid most always. The proposal is in stone though, and he has nothing he can do but angrily take it.

Being a political marriage, between two of the most powerful families in existence at that, the event is more extravagant that any their kingdoms, or whatever the fuck you wanna call it, have seen. It’s a long process, planning and arrangements taking up the time of everything and everyone. While their people are up in spirits, the parties personally affected sit holding their breaths. The trust between the two so dismal that they can’t help but sit in wait for a pin to drop and pandemonium to break out, but alas, it never comes. Jason and Percy are successfully wed, their people rejoicing and the finality of peace between their nations, prosperity is on their horizon for ages to come.

The base relationship of the two is bleak. It’s ugly silence or harsh spat words. What their people see is a gentle facade, a quiet couple who interact politely, moving as some well oiled machine amongst their followers who have nothing but gratefulness in their eyes as they share their support and wish them happiness. Externally, they’re near perfect. Their social outlook is perfect, they make news amongst the population as a perfect couple who greatly fit into each other, filling in the missing pieces. Jason has softened to his people and Percy has become slightly more organized. Internally however, this act has they growing weary. Not only because they have done nothing to really foster any sort of relationship between each other but also because when they both slip up, the act continues, but naturally. They speak to each other with ease and acceptance before realizing they were supposed to be butting heads. The weariness only grows as this continues, the moments of exhaustion from their personal and shared work causing slip ups where they seemingly just coexist together just cause this unsteady wall to build up between them until they break in the privacy of a shared space.

They’re angry and loud about it. Spouting insults and poking at each other’s weaknesses. And it’s through this fight that they kind of realize they’re at each other’s throats for everything and nothing. Because they’re fighting a fight not worth fighting. Working themselves up over angers directed at things their fathers have done, or directing rage at an assumption based off impersonal knowledge. Percy’s anger stems from his distrust of Zeus, but he’d known that Thalia wasn’t her father, why hadn’t he extended that shaky trust to Jason. And Jason anger stemmed from long festering jealousy, Percy had loving friends, loving family, and a pedestal he would never fall from because people had no reason to believe he would fail them, because when Percy got back up it was a sign of strength and resilience. Jason had always been made to believe falling meant he had to climb two times higher just to garner that belief from the overbearing figures in his life.

Their scuffle ended in quiet unspoken apology. From then on, they move forward as that well oiled machine, but they no longer hold up the act. They become more natural around each other, settling into this new life role they fill. The kingdom notices this new delicate awkwardness between the princes, most figure its the beginning of a trust budding relationship, and it is, but it’s still too fragile for either to particularly notice. Still feeling as if they’re treading this very recently made line of trust, they can’t put too much thought and weight into it when they’re just barely getting to really know each other.

Stupidly, war does break out (just for fun, I love when two people who are so perfect for each other fight together or against each other, it’s romantic lol) but it is easily fought. The utter cleanliness and synchronicity between the two only act as another vice to hold them closer together. They tear through enemies, entangling their fighting in a dance so elegant it could bring a theater audience to tears. They celebrate victory with their kingdoms with entwined emotions. But these new feelings of closeness don’t cause conflict, not external or internal. It’s met only with rightness.

Despite being wed, they don’t meet these feelings between them like lovers. They’re not that and they’d never been that. They let it build, acts of service and care being traded between each other without explicitly being voiced as such because why would they need to? They do fit into those missing pieces the other had, well enough that they’re able to communicate without necessarily having to be verbal about it. They only speak on it when necessary, like when Jason stays in Percy’s quarters for the first time and vise versa. Or when they first share a kiss. When they first bed each other. They’re very tactile in nature with each other.

Do not get me started on what could happen in this au if we let the Jason dying plot point happen here too because I will lose my mind.

Away from a story building lens (it was probably incredibly hectic apologies), I love this concept. Because it gives you the ability to draw out this relationship of what wants to be a rivalry between to similar but opposite people and what they could actually become. In canon, they became close friends. But I feel as though the true strength of what their bond could’ve been, even in a platonic sense, wasn’t touched on due to the shortness of their rivalry and also kind of how childish it had been made to seem. These two have incredible difficult lives and have very tricky circumstances that allot them certain difficulties to overcome, especially between each other. They’re each other’s perfections and imperfections AND their missing pieces all at once. If Jason had gotten more life brought into his story, maybe if we’d gotten his memories back in full, they’d have been even more interesting than they already are.

Thank you thank you anon for your ask!

#jason grace #jercy #percy jackson #pjo #hoo #toa #percy pjo #jason hoo #arranged marriage #arranged marriage au #political marriage au #pawz replies #asks

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kymuryacademia · 6 months

Text

November 15th, 2023

These photos are from the air flow simulation I did yesterday, to find out what impact the wind would have on the structure of the identification buoy. I recorded the animations to make it easier to analyze.

It was fun to do this, I discovered that I can make several different types of fluids, which could be useful in future projects. The article is almost ready, along with the boat and buoy codes.

Here are the charts with results generated from Solidworks:

Generally I don't do this, but I'll put the translation of the analysis I put in the article here, maybe it can help someone.

Although it is not common to carry out engineering tests in this specific context, we chose to conduct an analysis dedicated to aerodynamic conditions, aiming to understand the effect of wind on the structural integrity of the buoy. To carry out this study, we used Solidworks, making use of the fluid simulation system incorporated into the program.

Initially, we modeled the buoy structure, assigning specific materials to each component. Subsequently, we establish the necessary boundary conditions to faithfully simulate the behavior of the structure in real conditions. In the next step, we created surfaces that represent the wind pressure in the region where it impacts the buoy, and defined the area in which the wind pressure would be applied. The application of wind loads and adjustment of analysis settings were carried out using the “Flow Simulation” tool.

This process allowed an accurate representation of the aerodynamic conditions on the buoy structure. Additionally, we adjust relevant parameters for the analysis, ensuring a comprehensive approach.

The simulation execution culminated in the generation of a comprehensive report, documenting the results obtained. The interpretation of these results provided valuable insights into the structure's performance under simulated aerodynamic conditions. This engineering test highlighted the importance of considering aerodynamic conditions when assessing structural integrity.

It is possible to highlight some fundamental reasons for the importance of this analysis, such as the assessment of structural integrity, assessment of operational safety, design optimization, which can result in savings in materials and manufacturing costs.

The Montagem_boia.SLDSAM model was configured with standard parameters, carrying out 57 iterations to achieve convergent results. The mesh was defined with basic dimensions (Nx = 40, Ny = 9, Nz = 17), and boundary conditions were established to represent the fluid environment of interest.

The physical time interval considered was 0 seconds, and the CPU time required for the simulation was also recorded. The simulation results revealed an interesting distribution of fluid properties and flow characteristics. The total number of cells in the mesh was 7626, all occupied by the fluid. Among these, 1106 cells were in direct contact with solids.

The mesh dimensions (X,Y,Z) indicated a significant extension of the model, with minimum and maximum variations in each direction. Analysis of the velocity field revealed a range of [0 m/s; 7,510 m/s], indicating different flow regimes within the simulation domain. The pressure varied between [101294.37 Pa; 101430.23 Pa], with a reference pressure of 101325.00 Pa. The temperature remained relatively constant, with values varying from [293.20 K; 293.21 K]. The fluid density showed a minimum variation, within the range of [1.20 kg/m^3; 1.21 kg/m^3].

There was no consideration of factors such as heat in solids, radiation, porous media and gravity to simplify the model to meet the specific objectives of this simulation. Based on the analysis of the images obtained, the reduction in wind speed becomes visible when facing the structure of the identifying buoy.

Notably, the average wind speed in São Paulo, situated at 25km/h, is insufficient to cause damage to the aforementioned structure or to displace it from its original position. It is also worth noting that, when encountering the obstacle represented by the buoy, the wind flow tends to bypass the structure mostly from above, to the detriment of the sides.

This observation suggests an effective resistance of the buoy to direct wind impact, contributing to its stability and structural robustness. The results clearly indicate that the structure's resistance to wind action is remarkable, since the force exerted by the wind did not reach levels that would compromise the integrity or stability of the configuration.

The solidity of the structure in the face of these conditions suggests that the design presents a robust and adequate response to the expected wind loads.

Sorry for any grammatical errors ~

#stem #studyblr #stem academia #studyspo #study motivation #studyinspo #study aesthetic #engineering #studying #solidworks #3d model #computer engineering #mathematics #flow simulation #cad

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spacetimewithstuartgary · 1 year

Photo

How heat flow affects the Earth’s magnetic field Compass readings that do not show the direction of true north and interference with the operations of satellites are a few of the problems caused by peculiarities of the Earth’s magnetic field. The magnetic field radiates around the world and far into space, but it is set by processes that happen deep within the Earth’s core, where temperatures exceed 5,000-degress C. New research from geophysicists at the University of Leeds suggests that the way this super-hot core is cooled is key to understanding the causes of the peculiarities - or anomalies, as scientists call them - of the Earth’s magnetic field. Dynamo at the centre of the Earth In the extremely hot temperatures found deep in the Earth, the core is a mass of swirling, molten iron which acts as a dynamo. As the molten iron moves, it generates the Earth’s global magnetic field. Convective currents keep the dynamo turning as heat flows out of the core and into the mantle, a rock layer that extends 2900 kilometres up to the Earth’s crust. Research by Dr Jonathan Mound and Professor Christopher Davies, from the School of Earth and Environment at Leeds, has found that this cooling process does not happen in a uniform way across the Earth - and these variations cause anomalies in the Earth’s magnetic field. Variations in earth’s magnetic field Seismic analysis has identified that there are regions of the mantle, under Africa and the Pacific for instance, that are particularly hot. Computer simulations by the researchers have revealed that these hot zones reduce the cooling effect on the core – and this causes regional or localised changes to the properties of the magnetic field. For example, where the mantle is hotter, the magnetic field at the top of the core is likely to be weaker. And this results in a weaker magnetic field which is projected into space above the South Atlantic, which causes problems for orbiting satellites. Interference with space technology Dr Mound, who led the study, said: “One of the things that the magnetic field in space does is deflect charged particles emitted from the sun. When the magnetic field is weaker, this protective shield is not so effective. “So, when satellites pass over that area, these charged particles can disrupt and interfere with their operations.” Scientists have known about the anomaly over the South Atlantic since they started monitoring and observing the magnetic field, but it is not known if it is a long-lived feature or something that has happened more recently in the history of the Earth. As the study at Leeds has revealed, the anomalies are likely to be caused by differences in the rate at which heat is flowing from the Earth’s core into the mantle. Whereabouts in the Earth’s inner structure these heat flow differences happen is likely to dictate how long they could last. Dr Mound added: “Processes in the mantle happen very slowly, so we can expect the temperature anomalies in the lower mantle will have stayed the same for tens of millions of years. Therefore, we would expect the properties of the magnetic field they create also to have been similar over tens of millions of years. “But the hotter, outer core is quite a dynamic fluid region. So, the heat flows and the magnetic field properties they cause will probably fluctuate on shorter time scales, perhaps for 100's to 1000's of years.”

#space #science #Astronomy #physics #news

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eleemosynecdoche · 20 days

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To begin with, here's why I'm doing this:

I like mythology. Much of my creative work has involved mythology as a source to engage with. Many of the works of art I enjoy enough to engage in fannishness about are also ones which engage heavily with mythology. On purely descriptive terms, I care about this stuff.

However, the way in which I care about it is different from how many people in online and fannish spaces care about it, and I think that the way I care about it is worth articulating so that people can understand it as an option or alternative they can choose and pursue. It might also help people understand some of the things I say and make, which I would also like to happen.

So. What am I disagreeing with?

I would call it a mode of engaging with mythology which has the following qualities:

It is atomizing, treating mythology functionally as a collection of stories that are connected through characters and settings.

It is reifying, treating mythology as a static phenomenon which is always dead- one can draw upon the corpse but whatever one does is separate from the corpse.

It is reverential and deferential, treating mythology as existing on some removed plane of cultural production and "proper" engagement with mythology approaching from "below", with the products of engagement with mythology being intrinsically lesser than the mythology.

It is isolating, treating mythology as existing in a separate sphere. This includes both vulgar Marxism that treats the base-superstructure relationship as one-way and incurious rejection of mythology as contextual.

Some of this is plainly a product of how academic analysis of mythology functions, and some of it is a decontextualized use of pieces of that functionality. Regardless, I think this approach has serious pitfalls when it comes to both understanding a number of artistic works and engaging in creative activity with mythology.

Thus, to lay out oppositions and what I think:

Mythology is always embedded in a system or multiple systems, and cannot be reduced to simply a collection of stories, because the throughlines between stories on different topics and the structural, thematic, and symbolic similarities between mythological stories are important.

Mythology is only truly dead when it is forgotten and is always fluid and changing. Media which engages with mythology creatively, even for the purposes of analysis, is part of that mythological tradition.

Treating mythology with reverence is not the same thing as treating it respectfully or seriously, and in many cases, the two things are directly opposed. Furthermore, deferentiality impairs understanding and use- by treating yourself as always "below" a teacher, you can't truly learn from them, because the transmission of knowledge makes you an equal to the teacher once taught.

Mythology connects to the broader world. It both transforms in response to changes in the material circumstances of culture which produces it, but transforms those material circumstances in turn. It is frequently necessary to treat it in isolation temporarily, but it is fundamentally connected.

High-minded principles, huh? Let's see what I think flows out of them and where I got them from.

#the effy myth

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disco-elysium-via-polls · 4 months

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🎵 The Field Autopsy

3. Look for a good spot to cut.

THE HANGED MAN - The belt is equally tight around the whole circumference of his neck, swelling over the edges like white bread, rising from the yeast.

"Yes, I'm Cuno's pig. I agree."

CUNO - "You are," he says with calm certainty. "This pig is Cuno's."

VOLITION [Easy: Success] - Being Cuno's pig has a steadying effect on your hand. Go with the flow, man...

3. [Physical Instrument - Medium 11] Cut the belt off.

+1 Agreement with Cuno

PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT [Medium: Failure] - You jam the cutters right under the knot -- that seems like a smart idea. Yeah, *somewhere there*. Already they're buried deep in the man's flesh. Then you rotate them to get a better hold. Then...

Rotate some more!

Enough, cut some!

'Fuckady-fuck...'

KIM KITSURAGI - The lieutenant looks by, somewhat worried as you summon power words to your aid.

Rotate some more!

THE HANGED MAN - A really, really bad smell is coming from there now. And... some kind of cracking sound.

2. Enough, cut some!

CUNOESSE - "Yeah, fuck him! FUCK THAT FÄGÄRI! Corpse fucking time!"

CUNO - "Told you my pig was hard core."

KIM KITSURAGI - "I should have a go first -- I think I have a strategy." He steps in and takes the chaincutters from you.

Let him work.

"No, give them back, I was just about to cut it off."

KIM KITSURAGI - "His head, yes -- you were about to cut off his head." He sinks the cutters into the knot, preparing to perform the cuts -- with his elbow to his knee for precision.

+5 XP

THE HANGED MAN - *Snap!* The knot is slashed. Another cut and the belt falls apart like a flower bouquet, revealing the dead man's neck -- and the dark red ligature mark around it.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Here," he hands you the chaincutters back and then kneels closer to the body -- running his finger along the dark red groove. Until he comes to a gap...

"The rope rises to a point," he says, "leaving a gap in the ligature mark. The suspension point is in the back of the neck, on the nape."

"Haemorrhaging is observed on the skin above and below the ligature mark. The mark is well pronounced, consistent with a drop from 1 or 1.5 metres."

Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Chest is intact." He presses down on it. "Normal contour. Abdomen is protuberant, pelvis intact. Genitalia..." He pulls down the man's underpants.

CUNO - "*NOW* IT'S GONNA HAPPEN! C!!!"

CUNOESSE - "I fuckin' knew it!"

EMPATHY [Easy: Success] - This is clearly what they've been waiting for. Ever since the autopsy began. The lieutenant is trying to make it as boring as possible.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Genitalia is male and unremarkable. No evidence of injury."

"Does it look like he was *enjoying* his moment of death?"

Inspect the genitals.

Write it down and move on.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Ah, yes -- your hunch, before. We can have a semen analysis requested -- from Processing -- if that's what you meant."

"Yes. Processing. Science. That's what I meant."

"No, I was trying to get a *psychic* read."

KIM KITSURAGI - "No you weren't, officer -- that would be preposterous." He shakes his head. "Just write down that we request a semen, vaginal, and anal fluids analysis."

THE HANGED MAN - The corpse with his pants down does not have an opinion on the subject. All he has is genitals and a deathly odour.

2. Inspect the genitals.

THE HANGED MAN - The dead man's penis is average-sized, congested from the downward collection of blood. The testicles are uneven in length, hanging underneath. The genitalia is greenish; marbling is present around the crotch.

3. Write it down -- add semen sample.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Back is symmetrical and intact." He struggles to turn the corpse on his side. "Upper and lower extremities are intact, but asymmetrical. There are combat injuries on the right hand, thigh, and hip."

"In addition, I see smaller, residual scars -- too numerous to count, covering about 30% of his skin."

VISUAL CALCULUS [Medium: Success] - From wounds sustained over two, maybe more decades. Dispersal and accumulation indicates long and active combat duty.

"This scarring is extensive. Way more than a law official's."

Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Mhm," he nods. "We have a real museum here. Of battles, wars..."

Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Last item -- hands." He takes the man's right hand in his, inspects it -- then moves on to the other hand...

Pick up the hand.

Let the lieutenant work alone.

INLAND EMPIRE [Easy: Success] - His flesh is cold. Icy.

THE HANGED MAN - Pleased to meet you. Where are you from and what's your name?

My name is...

I'm from...

"What the..."

THE HANGED MAN - I'm only fucking with you! I know where you're from -- from Coppodocia! And your name is *Il Cobo*. What can I do you for, Il Cobo di Coppodocia?

It's good to hold your hand -- did you like it when I stroked your hair?

Nothing. I got nothing.

THE HANGED MAN - I did, Cobo, I did. Reminded me of when I was just a small boy. Before *this* happened to my face and my body. You did me a kindness there.

We should do this more often. Be close like this, I mean.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Hands are clean," the lieutenant concludes. The dead man's fingers slip from your hand, cold and sausage-like. "No sign of injury from struggling."

"Were we expecting any?"

Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "I was. Maybe I'm just not seeing them... Honestly, the stench is making it hard for me to think at the moment."

EMPATHY [Medium: Success] - Working so close to the fumes coming from the corpse must be hard. You realize suddenly that the lieutenant has been barely keeping it together these past two items.

Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Whooh..." He turns to the side to breathe -- it's not enough. He buries his face in the sleeve of his jacket. You hear a muffled voice: "That's *all* for the external. Well done! What next?"

I'm going to take the opportunity to leave for a second so I can give Kim a breather, and also save our progress. Nothing particularly noteworthy happened when I went back to the body, so let's resume.

2. "2. Internal examination -- summary."

KIM KITSURAGI - "Central nervous system," he says and then concludes abruptly: "I have nothing. Do you have anything on this man's central nervous system?"

CONCEPTUALIZATION [Medium: Success] - Of course: there is a moral to be drawn from it -- a moral to this story!

"If I may add the *moral* of this story..."

"Nope." Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "What would that be?" He looks at you inquisitively.

THE HANGED MAN - The dead man looks too, with barely contained excitement to hear the moral of his story.

"The brain is very vulnerable to compromises in its blood supply."

"I'll write N/A."

KIM KITSURAGI - "I think that may well be the moral of *every* story, officer." The lieutenant grins.

SUGGESTION [Medium: Success] - Thank you for lightening his mood. It's hard down there.

+1 Reputation

"I'll write N/A."

KIM KITSURAGI - "Good. Muscoskeletal. Purge fluid is coming from the mouth." He gets close to the mouth-hole, eyes squinting from the stench: "Not injury related. Eyes and tongue protuberant. Hyoid bone... let's see."

With his eyes almost closed, the lieutenant puts his hand on the dead man's throat and begins to massage it, gently. A rotting smell erupts from the mouth. Purge fluid runs down his lips -- black and viscous.

PERCEPTION (HEARING) [Medium: Success] - You hear cracks as the lieutenant moves his sharp fingers inside the flesh. Like the creaking of an old house at night.

CUNOESSE - "Yeah, jack that fucker off!"

KIM KITSURAGI - "The hyoid bone is *fractured*," he says after a while. "The rest of the muscoskeletal system is intact, unremarkable."

Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Respiratory system..." Back hunched -- as if in prayer -- he begins to pry open the dead man's jaws. He stops to exert more force. Both hands are used.

"Oral cavity shows no lesions. The victim has received dental implants, possibly after a combat wound. Mouth swollen, haemorrhaging present in mucose of the lips and mouth."

INLAND EMPIRE [Medium: Success] - From here it looks as though the clown-faced man is screaming. The tendons of his jaw are torn apart, hyoid ripped from the force of the lieutenant's hands.

Look inside the dead man's mouth.

Write it down.

THE HANGED MAN - No scream, no sigh of relief rises from the darkness inside. It's humid there, sickly sweet air unlike anything living. You feel like you're about to throw up again, straight in that mouth of his...

2. Look deeper inside.

THE HANGED MAN - "It's hard. Once more you taste stomach acid in the back of your throat. A contraction -- your throat pumps a little something from your stomach and into your mouth. You're forced to swallow, just to keep looking..."

-1 Health

Inside you see darkness. Just a mess of meat and darkness.

INLAND EMPIRE [Easy: Success] - THERE ARE ANCIENT MYSTERIES DOWN THERE, COBO... ASK ME LATER.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Haemorrhaging present in mucous," the lieutenant repeats impatiently. He lets go of the jaws. The mouth snaps shut before you.

3. Write it down.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Hepatobiliary. N/A." He wipes his brow.

"Why? Don't we have anything?"

Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Are you a hepatobiliary expert?" He looks at the corpse's stomach with a mixture of tiredness and disgust.

"I don't think so."

Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Neither am I."

"And that's it?"

Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "That's it."

Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Same for toxicology and serology - N/A."

"*Both*?"

Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Unless you have untapped reservoirs of knowledge there?"

"The completionist in me wonders if there's something we could still do..."

Write: N/A.

KIM KITSURAGI - "We only have one test, as per regulation -- and we already requested semen."

CUNO - "Pigs requestin' semen like it's no big deal."

CUNOESSE - "I'm not even interested in these boring *mulkkus* anymore. Haven't sucked him off or anything..."

#disco elysium #kim kitsuragi #cuno #cunoesse #the hanged man

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thisiswash · 7 months

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uuuuuuuuuuu unit conversion and fluids and thermo calcs and mass flow and reynolds numbers and transition regions and entrance lengths and uncertainties and stoichiometry and report writing and sampling rate analysis and friction factors and the GODDAMN MOODY CHART-

like look at this shit!!

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celinolesunshine · 2 years

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THE ANALYSES OF FICTIONAL WORKS VOL. ONE, SECTIONS SIX & SEVEN

THE WORK BEHIND THE ANALYSIS:

a not so sunny world (prequel) by @pixelchills on AO3

(intro) (one) (two) (three) (four/five) (THIS PART)

TW: MENTIONS OF SELF-HARM, BODILY INJURY, PANIC ATTACKS AND GENERAL OVERTHINKING/ACUTE ANXIETY, MINOR CHARACTER DEATH, BODILY FLUIDS (both urine and vomit are mentioned briefly in some chapters), AND TOPICS OF SEX AND SEXUALITY, INCLUDING THEMES SUCH AS AROUSAL AND PLEASURABLE/PLEASURING ACTIVITIES AND AWARENESS.

spoilers under the cut!!!!

CHAPTERS SIX-SEVEN: FIRST DAY OF TRAINING/THE LITTLE DEVICE

THESE. CHAPTERS. WERE. SMART.

Chapter six let us know that Sun and Moon would be, for the most part, training together. This chapter was a LOT of establishing dialogue, and I loved how the entire conversation seemed to flow much like a normal one would, and I was able to follow along for the whole thing. We end up figuring out some pretty important details, including that Sun is afraid of the dark.

The hug at the beginning was BEAUTIFUL, especially since Pixel managed to describe how Moon smelled good in a.. non-creepy way. Overall the hurt/comfort in the beginning section made me wanna cry.

The end of chapter six ended up leading with Sun and Moon eating lunch together, and I honest-to-god have to shout out Pixel for thinking of the mini-origin of Sun’s gap tooth (or at least I think that’s what they were going for, I’m not sure); Sun ate a minty candy that’s meant for Animutants with sharp teeth and accidentally chipped a bit of his tooth off. I absolutely ADORE how Moon was willing to share his boiled egg with Sun. I hate boiled eggs, but I can honestly see him loving them for their funny texture.

Chapter seven as a bit of a ride. The beginning of the chapter threw us right in with another panic attack (again, very well done, UGH?!) and had Sun all but CLINGING onto Moon.

At this point, these little devices have him so spooked and the writing is done in such a way that I just want to hold the little guy. Thankfully, there’s Moon for that :)

FAVOURITE SECTION FROM THESE CHAPTERS:

Sunrise lifted his hand and touched Moondrop's face. He just... wanted to make sure it was really him.

Moondrop's face was warm, and soft. He was, indeed, right there. Holding him tight. Stroking his rays. So close, so close.

Sunrise could feel something inside of him twist, almost uncomfortably, but somehow, it was also very comforting. What was this feeling?

Moondrop's face was turning redder at every passing second. He burrowed his eyebrows again, and his small gentle smile slowly turned upside down. Suddenly, he looked very angry.

"Does your tummy hurt again?" Sunrise asked him.

Moondrop's lips twitched back upwards for a moment, and he nodded slowly.

Sunrise placed his cheek against Moondrop's belly, and wrapped his arms gently around his torso.

"Oh, why are you hurting him, tummy? That's not very nice of you," he spoke to the fabric of Moon's shirt.

This section had so many good fucking moments, but I had to pick the one where Sun and Moon were being fluffy boys together. ALWAYS will this interaction be SO SWEET to me just because of how they’re discovering their feelings for each other, and I’m always such a sucker for Moon being a little bit of a crushing mess.

#a not so sunny world #pixelchills #the analyses of fictional works #TAOFW #holy shit #fnaf security breach #security breach #fnaf #daycare attendant

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repriseofthereprise · 4 months

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Catharine MacKinnon speaks on the work of Andrea Dworkin

This speech was given by Catharine A. MacKinnon at the Andrea Dworkin Commemorative Conference, April 7, 2006. This original transcript was prepared by secondwaver (blog now defunct).

Andrea should have been here for this. She would have liked it, or most of it. [laughter in audience]

There’s something awful, in both senses, that is, terrible and awe-inspiring, both, about Andrea’s work having to be my topic, instead of my tool, speaking her words not only to further our work together as they were and we did, for over thirty years, but to speak about it, and about her, as a subject, and in the past tense.

Yet even at the same time, her clarity and her passion and her inspiration to all of us to go further, go deeper, flows through her words.

Her whole theory is amazingly present in each phrase that she used. As Blake saw a whole world in a grain of sand, in each of Andrea’s sentences you can see the whole world the way she saw it.

Andrea Dworkin was a theorist and a writer of genius, an unparalleled speaker and activist, a public intellectual of exceptional breadth and productivity. Her work embraced the last quarter of the twentieth century and spanned fiction, critical works of literature, political analysis in essays and speeches and books, and journalism. Her legacy includes a vivid example of the simultaneity of thinking and activism, and of art and politics. Formally, she was an Enlightenment philosopher, in that she believed in and used reason. She was interested in diginity and equality and morality, and, especially, in freedom. Her contribution as a complex humanist was to apply all of this to women, and that changed everything.

An original thinker and literary artist, Andrea saw society ordered by power and the status excrescences of its variations animated by the sexual. She pioneered understanding the social construction of sexuality, and the sexual construction of the social, long before academics dared touch this third rail of social life.

In talking about The Story of O, a book of S/M pornography, in her book, Woman Hating, she says, “The Story of O claims to define epistomologically what a woman is.” She saw O as “a book of astounding political significance.”

Largely overlooked as an intellectual in her own time, she mapped social life before the postmodernists did, finding fairy tales and pornography to be maps for women’s oppression. She wrote about humiliation and fear before study of the emotions was a big academic trend. She analyzed social meaning before hermeneutics really caught on in the scholarly world, asking what pornography means, as for example, in the preface to Pornography, “this is not a book about what should or should not be shown. It is a book about the meaning of what is being shown,” what intercourse means, to men and women, most of all, what freedom for women means.

Her first book, Woman Hating, she “wrote to find out why I am not free, and what I can do to become free.” In her later work, this emphasis on freedom was synthesized with a re-made equality, consistent with and necessary for that freedom.

Her cadences were rhythmic, her use of repetition gaining inevitability and momentum, her suddenly-shifting convergences and metaphors were telling, and often surprising, lyric and antic, fluid and explosive by turns.

Such was her skill as a writer that she gave us almost the experience of pornography without her writing–being–pornography. She could even make intercourse funny, writing of Norman O. Brown speaking of entering women “as if we were lobbies and elevators.” [laughter in audience]

And for undertaking a synchronic reading of her work as a whole and selecting some over-arching themes, I want to reflect for just a minute on what it means that we are here doing this.

The relation between the work and the life is not a new question. But the relation between who Andrea Dworkin was and how her work was socially received is. And it has, as some of us have noticed, shifted noticeably, even dramatically, since the death of her body.

Three months after she died, so unexpectedly, a prominent French political theorist in a Ph.D. exam that I was in, in Paris, referred to her, excoriating the poor student, for eliminating various notables from the bibliography, referred to her as “l’incomparable Andrea Dworkin”–this, in a country that has long refused even to translate her work!

How has the world related Andrea Dworkin’s body to her body of work? Why was it necessary to destroy her credibility and bury her work alive, only now to be resurrected, disinterred, as it were? Why can now she be taken seriously, respected, even read, now that her body is no longer here? Why this is the first conference ever to be held on her work is one side of the coin of the question of why there never was one when she was alive. Her work is as alive now as it ever was, as challenging, threatening, illuminating, inspiring. Maybe it is that she can no longer tell us that we’re wrong, but don’t bet on it. Or maybe if you engage her work while she’s alive you further her mission, and we can’t have that, now, can we?

But why was respecting her and taking her work seriously such a risk? Why were the people who did it considered brave? As the quintessential scholar of the hell of women’s embodiment in social space, Andrea’s relation to her work is posed by, as well as in, this conference. Her work guides us to pursue this question, I think, as one of stigma. Stigma is what has kept people from reading Andrea Dworkin’s work, especially in the academy, where, I must note, people are not noted for their courage. That stigma has been sexual, due to her public identification as a woman with women, including lesbian women, especially as a sexually abused woman publicly identified with sexually violated women–in particular, the raped and the prostituted among us.

Being marked by sexuality, is, in her analysis, the stigma of being female, analyzed by Andrea in greatest depth in Intercourse, a work of literary and political criticism, a work of how men imagine and construct sexual intercourse when they can have it any way they want it, as they can, in fiction. It is a work of criticism of literature, that is at the same time a trenchant and visionary work of social criticism, her most distorted, I would say, a signal honor in a crowded field, published in 1987, at, as John and I were saying, the height of her powers. Of Elma, in Tennessee Williams’ Summer and Smoke, she wrote: “This being marked by sexuality requires a cold capacity to use, and a pitiful vulnerability that comes from having been used, or a pitiful vulnerability that comes from something lost or unattainable, love, or innocence, or hope, or possibility. Being stigmatized by sex,” she wrote, “is being marked by its meaning, in a human life of loneliness and imperfection where some pain is indelible.”

If the stigma of being a woman is the stigma of the body sexually violated, it lessens some when you die. That, girls, is the good news! [laughter in audience] Before now, we have had to be kept from reading Andrea Dworkin’s work, and were, by the living, breathing existence of her sexualized body attached to it, thereby, that work was sexualized. We had to be kept from holding a violated woman’s body in our hands and having her speak to us what she knows. Especially, we had to be kept from knowing in-depth, up close, and personal, that for women, having a body means having a sexuality attributed to you, the sexuality, specifically, of being a sexual thing for use, and from knowing that the need to be fucked in order to see and value ourselves as female means living within a political system that is pervasive, cultural, organized, institutionalized, unnatural, and unnecessary. Cutting to the quick of all of this, with her customary conciseness, Andrea always said she would be rich and famous when she was dead.

Now, Andrea’s great subject is the status and treatment of women, as has been said, focusing on violence against women, as central to depriving women of freedom.

Andrea’s method was predicated on the lived, visceral body experience that women have of our social status. She mined her life, particularly, in her work, knowing what she wrote from experience. Her driving force was rage and outrage, unapologetic critique, unbridled, passionate, truth-telling. Her sensibility was tenderness, kindness, and love. Her aesthetic is political–political in method, that is, you know it’s true because it happened to you, political in voice–clear, direct, no writing for passive readers, as John noted, and no talking down to anyone.

In the rhythms you can feel her breathing. Here is a woman talking to a publisher who is trying to get her to have sex with him. Essentially, this is a woman being sexually harassed. It is from Ice and Fire.

“I want, I say, to be treated a certain way, I say, I want, I say, to be treated like a human being, I say, and he, weeping, calls my name and says, please, begging me in the silence, not to say another word, because his heart is tearing open, please, he says, calling my name. I want, I say, to be treated, I say, I want, I say, to be treated with respect, I say, as if, I say, I have, I say, a right, I say, to do what I want to do, I say, because, I say, I am smart, and I have written, and I am good, and I do good work, and I am a good writer, and I have published. And I want, I say, to be treated, I say, like someone, I say, like a human being, I say, who has done something. I say, like that, I say, not like a whore. Not like a whore, I say, not any more. And I say to him, seriously, some day I will die from this, just from this, just from being treated like a whore, nothing else. I will die from it and he says, dryly, with a certain self-evident truth on his side, you will probably die from pneumonia, actually.”

Her writing is new; this is a new voice in literature. It has new forms; it’s full of new ideas, in part because the reality she wrote, like her, was submerged and ignored. But she was interested in all the classical questions of western philosophy–method, reality, consciousness, meaning, freedom, equality, especially the relation of thought to world, and the connections between social order and human action.

She created new concepts: moral intelligence, scapegoat, woman hating, not quite the same as misogyny, gynocide, gave new meaning to the term possession. She was a profound moral philosopher, and she gave new juice to old concepts like dignity, honor, and cruelty.

But I’m going to do a reading now, today, of her as a political philosopher, a specifically intellectual reading of her work in terms of these questions. Which is not how she wrote it to be read, actually. But she certainly knew what she was doing in these terms. She did not use the word method, but she had one, and she knew it. She observed in her book Pornography: “Women have been taught, that, for us, the earth is flat, and that if we venture out we will fall off the edge. Some of us have ventured out, nevertheless, and so far, we have not fallen off.”

In the afterward of Woman Hating, she said this: “One can be excited about ideas, without changing at all. One can think about ideas, talk about ideas, without changing at all. People are willing to think about many things. What people refuse to do, or are not permitted to do, or resist doing, is to change the way they think.” She knew thinking had a way, and that she had a way of thinking, and she wrote to change the way people thought.

Central to all her work was a metaphysical distinction between what she once termed truth and reality. While the system of gender polarity is real, it is not true.” The polarity of the sexes is a reality because reality is social. Equality of the sexes is true, but social reality is not based on it, but instead on a model that is not true, that is, that the sexes are bipolar, discrete, and opposite–some of us with little, tiny feet. For example, “we are living imprisoned inside a pernicious delusion, a delusion on which all reality, as we know it, is predicated.”

And, then, similarly, on the relation actually between sex and gender–not called that–but check it out: “Foot binding did not emphasize the differences between men and women, it created them, and they were then perpetuated in the name of morality.”

She also said we “need to destroy the phallic identity in men, and masochistic non-identity in women.” Now, it is not that she thought all reality was only an idea, as in classical idealism or only a psychology or an identity in the internal sense. She analyzed material reality and ideas as equally, and reciprocally, even circularly determinative. Of reality, she wrote this: “Men have asked over the centuries a question, that, in their hands, ironically, becomes abstract: ‘What is reality?’ They have written complicated volumes on this question. The woman who was a battered wife and has escaped knows the answer.” Philosophers, take note (is my note here): “Reality is when something is happening to you, and you know it, and can say it, and when you say it, other people understand what you mean and believe you. That is reality, and the battered wife, imprisoned alone in a nightmare that is happening to her has lost it, and can not find it anywhere. A fist in your face is not just the idea of a fist in your face. Reality is relational, and that relation is unequal and social.”

She also wrote explicitly of the relation between the ideational and the material in women’s status, without using specifically those words. That is, both have to be there, and both are there. In Right Wing Women, her 1978 book, the most extended analysis of women’s status and of feminism together, the elements and preconditions of both, she said this: “It does not matter whether prostitution is perceived as the surface condition, with pornography hidden in the deepest recesses of the psyche, or whether pornography is perceived as the surface condition, with prostitution being its wider, more important, hidden base, the largely unacknowledged sexual economic necessity of women. Each has to be understood as intrinsically part of the condition of women, pornography being what women are, prostitution being what women do, and the circle of crimes–these are the crimes against women, rape, battering, incest, and so on, that she discussed–being what women are for.”

The resulting “female metaphysics” under male dominance means that rape, battery, economic and reproductive exploitation “define the condition of women correctly, in accordance with what women are, and what women do,” correctly meaning consistently and accurately, within the existing system. She also said you can’t be a feminist and support any element of this model, including “so-called feminists who indulge in using the label but evading the substance.”

Her identification with women made her especially brilliant at seeing how women’s views are reflected in their material circumstances, hence, were rational, in that sense, including in her devastating portrayal of the academic, not-Andrea, so-called feminist woman who begins and ends Mercy, one of her novels, having been sexually abused, actually, this not-Andrea woman with the arch voice, siding with abstraction, with power, and with distance.

Right wing women, she shows in her book of the same name, also side with male power, because it is powerful, and reject feminism because women are powerless, in the hope, and on the bet, that male protection is a better deal than feminists’ resistance and struggle for change. It is, in that sense, a rational choice, meaning a direct reflection of their circumstances, which isn’t to say that it’s in their long-term interest.

She saw, always, how what women think and do makes sense in light of the realities of male power. As she put about right wing women, “the tragedy is that women so committed to survival can not recognize that they are committing suicide.”

The right–this is part of her deep analysis of religious fundamentalism–gives women form, shelter, safety, rules, and love. This complex and respecting analysis completely outdistances any analysis of false consciousness.

Similarly, in Intercourse, which I am going to have to discuss, this part, she wrote complexly of what it meant that Joan of Arc was a virgin. Probably not literally, she said, but because she carried herself with the dignity of the nonpenetrated, i.e. as a man, and her dressing as a man meant noncompliance with her inferior/female status, for which the Inquisition killed her. Joan wore men’s clothes, not to flout convention, or to make a statement about women’s status, or to portray dignity (performists take note), but because she’d been raped in prison. All she had to do was say–this is Joan–that she would not wear men’s clothes, and they would let her go free. Andrea says, “she was a woman who was raped and beaten and did not care if she died. That indifference is a consequence of rape, not transvestism.”

A new concept of ideology as sexual was proposed by Andrea in the book, Pornography: Men Possessing Women. Pornography is analyzed as male ideology, for its meaning and its dynamics. The concrete harms of pornography weren’t, then, its central topic. All the evidence of that was to come. But Andrea notes that “with the technologically advanced methods of graphic depiction, real women are required for the depiction, as such, to exist.”

In asking what it means, she said this: “the fact that pornography is widely believed to be sexual representations or depictions of sex emphasizes only that the valuation of women as low whores is widespread, and that the sexuality of women is perceived as low and whorish in itself. She says, “The fact that pornography is widely believed to be depictions of the erotic means only that the debasing of women is held to be the real pleasure of sex, and it also embodies and exploits, sells and promotes the idea that ‘female sexuality is dirty.’

So how do you go from seeing to being pornography, from buying a woman in pornography to owning her, from owning pictures of her to owning her, you might be wondering. She says this: “Male sexual domination is a material system with an ideology and a metaphysics. The metaphysics of male sexual domination is that women are whores. The sexual colonization of women’s bodies is a material reality.” This ideology is effectuated sexually, a level of belief and experience never before analyzed as political and gendered in the way she did.

Now on the subject of freedom, her core concern. She notes in her piece, “Violence against Women: It Breaks the Heart, Also the Bones,” “Our abuse has become a standard of freedom, the meaning of freedom, the requisite for freedom throughout much of the western world.” She goes on to say, “as to pornography, the uses of women in pornography are considered liberating.”

The subject of Intercourse, specifically, is what freedom means for women, precisely, how it is denied by the inferiority imposed and the occupation effected thereby, “destroying in women the will to political freedom, destroying the love of freedom itself,” when it takes place under conditions of force, fear, and inequality.

She says, ” to want freedom is to want not only what men have but also what men are. This is male identification as militance, not feminine submission. It is deviant, complex.” This becomes something she terms “the new virginity,” or what might be called the new freedom. “Believing that sex is freedom,” she says, intercourse needs blood, “to count as a sex act in a world excited by sadomasochism, bored by the dull thud-thud of the literal fuck. Blood-letting of sex, a so-called freedom, exercised in alienation, cruelty and despair, trivial and decadent, proud, foolish, liars, we are free.”

This analysis converged her thinking on equality, which underwent a progression over her life. In Our Blood, the piece renouncing sexual equality, she rejected equality, which she understood there as “exchanging the male role for the female role.” There was no freedom or justice in it, an accurate understanding of the mainstream view of equality. Over time, she reclaimed and redefined equality. In “Against the Male Flood” she said, “equality is a practice; it is an action; it is a way of life. Equality is what we want, and we are going to get it.”

To clarify the relation between her freedom and the equality that she redefined, she said this (this is again in her piece for the Irish women, “Violence Against Women: It Breaks the Heart, Also the Bones”)–check this out–: “What we want to win is called freedom or justice when those being systematically hurt are not women. We call it equality because our enemies are family.”

Even with family, Andrea took no prisoners, a paradoxical result of her passionate humanism. She says this in “I Want a Twenty-Four Hour Truce During Which There Is No Rape,” a talk to five hundred men in 1983: “Have you ever wondered why we are not just in armed combat against you? It’s not because there’s a shortage of kitchen knives in this country. It’s because we believe in your humanity, against all the evidence.”

Now, her legacy leaves us a lot to do. We can learn from the richness of her thirteen volumes, we can read her work closely, figure out how her writing was so singularly effective, and we can effectuate it. We can respond to the challenges of her questions, and be changed by her interventions and fearless probing of the structures and forces and people that rule our lives, denied by most people, a denial she also analyzed.

But in the academy, you know, whole theses could be written exploring sentences chosen virtually at random, that are ripe with possibilities, such as this: “any violation of a woman’s body can become sex for men. This is the essential truth of pornography.”

Or this: “in pornography, everything means something,” overwhelmingly ignored by massive departments of Media Studies and Communications, except for a tiny branch of largely social psychologists. Or this one, an analysis of social life in gendered terms: “Money is one instrument of male force. Poverty is humiliating, and, therefore, a feminizing experience.” Now, envision an economics where the laws of motion of sexuality socially are as well understood as the laws of motion of money are understood today, and the relation between the two of them.

Or this. Racism has always been central to her analysis, as it was in Pornography: “the sexualization of race within a racist system is a prime purpose and consequence of pornography.” And she talked about depicting women by sexualizing their skin, thus sexualizing the abuse, sexually devaluing black skin in racist America by perceiving it as a sex organ.

In Scapegoat she took this entire analysis to a whole deeper and higher level simultaneously showing what a gendered analysis of racism would look like in application. Try this: “While Nazism was a male event, Auschwitz might be called a female event, built on a primal antagonism to the bodies of women, an antagonism that included sadistic medical experiments.” In Scapegoat she also said this: “Hitler tried to make Jews as foul and expendible as prostitutes already were, as inhuman as prostitutes were already taken to be.” All of this can be taken up, unpacked, deeply considered, extended, gone further with.

Andrea wanted a day without rape. She said, “I want to experience just one day of real freedom before I die.” And that was the day without rape. She didn’t get it. She told the story of her own life in many ways in her work, over and over again. In one meditation, in Ice and Fire, turning over and over Kafka’s referring to coitis as “punishment for the happiness of being together,”–that’s a quote from him–Andrea writes this: “Coitis is punishment. I write down everything I know, over some years. I publish. I have become a feminist, not the fun kind. Coitis is punishment, I say. It is hard to publish. I am a feminist, not the fun kind. Life gets hard. Coitis is not the only punishment. I write. I love solitude. Or, slowly, I would die. I do not die.”

She wrote in Intercourse of her vision of all of our sexual lives, never, as always, excluding herself. In writing of the sex reformer Ellen Key’s consistent vision of sexuality for women, in the words of Ellen Key: “based on a harmony that is both sensual and possible,” one not based, in Andrea’s words, “on fear of force and the reality of inequality as now.” “A stream, herself,” Andrea wrote, “she would move over the earth, sensual and equal; especially, she will go her own way.”

“A stream herself.” Well, maybe a raging river at flood tide, perhaps, Andrea went her own way. She even wrote what might be her own epitaph: “I am whole, and I am flames. I burn. I die. From this light, later you will see. Mama, I made some light.”

Living without Andrea is living without this special light, the one she burned her life to make. Her incandescent mind never to illuminate another dark chasm or hard alley or guard tower of male supremacy. We are going to need a lot of what she wrote about, so long ago, at the end of Lesbian Pride, in Our Blood, seeing us walking into a terrible dark storm in which she said, “Those who are raped will see the darkness as they look up into the face of the rapist” in hunger and despair.

Love for women was what we need to remember, she said, that light within us that shines, that burns, no matter the darkness without which there is no tomorrow and was no yesterday. Quoting her now, she said, “That light is within us–constant, warm and healing. Remember it, sisters, in the dark times to come.”

Question and Answer Session with Catharine MacKinnon

Clare Chambers: Thank you very much for a wonderful, wonderful address. Does anyone have any questions or comments they would like to make?

Male voice #1: You touched on, I think, race in her work, which is rarely commented on. Do you understand the, I mean, there’s an invisibilization around a lot that she did, but I’ve often wondered why that, in particular, kind of dropped off the radar screen, in people’s reading of her. Don’t you understand it?

Catharine MacKinnon: Well, a lot of women of color know it’s there, and haven’t missed it, at all. I think it’s because it would give her credibility, that pigeon-holing her as just the woman who talks about women, as if racism isn’t about women, that that pigeon-holing, you know, confines her. You know, people think that things about women are “that’s just that stuff about women. Now let’s talk about freedom, or equality, or dignity, but this about women’s just that stuff.” And it would break down that isolation to recognize the central place that it always had in her work and the indivisibility of the analysis of male dominance and white supremacy in her work.

Female voice #1: You know that there’s all kinds of lies out there about how feminists never considered issues of race, and the women’s movement was a white women’s movement, and so on,

Catharine MacKinnon: As if all these women of color weren’t there making the women’s movement before Day One!

Female voice #1: Absolutely! Absolutely! It’s the most common attack on feminism, really, and then you go back, and look at Woman Hating, which is from 1974, there’s a huge section in there on race, and how feminism came from the struggles against racism in the US. It’s an enormously powerful section, the book was 1974! So it was written in the two years previous to that, so it gives the complete lie to these very serious and ridiculous accusations against feminism, so I ..

Catharine MacKinnon: But also, also, those accusations, which, you know, in part, are valid, for pointing out that an analysis of racism in the women’s movement in general, needs to be better, needs to go further, and so on. It also makes invisible all the women of color who are the backbone of that movement. In other words, it has this double way of being racist in itself. It’s like they weren’t even there! Like they aren’t even there.

Female voice #2: One of the things you made in your talk, let me speak to something that, I’ve been thinking about how to … (untelligible) … pull up, that you said that many of her individual sentences could be Ph.D. theses in themselves…

Catharine MacKinnon: Right.

Female voice #2: … that you could take the sentences and unpack them and go… I’ve often felt that, you know, Andrea Dworkin’s work is complex, it’s very detailed, it’s very nuanced, it’s very kind of packed with meaning, and I think one of the reasons, perhaps, why her work has often been misrepresented is that people haven’t been willing to read it with that kind of complexity, haven’t been willing to read it with that kind of seriousness that often people are willing to read the work of, you know, “great male theorists,” and that they have kind of been willing to just read it of very quickly and to see sentences which are hard to understand in a nuanced way–would you share that idea?

Catharine MacKinnon: I do! You know, people were told how to read Andrea Dworkin’s work, and have remarkably, on the whole, it strikes me, accepted that. They were told, you know, simplistic lies, about what it’s about, and including what our work together was about, and so that’s then what they see, people who should know better. And especially people who make their living by reading and writing about what they read, really should read what they write about.

Female voice #3: I wondered if you could say anything helpful about the way forward … look at the situation through Andrea Dworkin’s vision of it … you’re living it, we’re all living it, in different ways … You’re an academic, you work in the law, I’m an academic, I work in … we’re all in these different situations where … we’re put in these situtations where we have to compromise, … I don’t know … we don’t have to compromise … people like Andrea …

Catharine MacKinnon: Do you have tenure?

Female voice #3: Yes, I do.

Catharine MacKinnon: Ok, well …

Female voice #3: But I’m under a gagging order by my university …

Catharine MacKinnon: Pardon me?

Female voice #4:

I’m under a gagging order by my university … I may not say why … I’m in a kind of complicated position … but, you know, I’m constantly interacting with people who make my blood boil, and I’m sure there’s lots of people here who are as well, … I don’t know … or else you don’t say anything and it makes you crazier …

Catharine MacKinnon:

Well, you know, this may sound odd, but I don’t identify as an academic. I do work in the world, which includes, when I can financially afford to do it, thinking and writing, which I, myself, I did for twelve years with no job at all, I mean no real job, just one hitch to another, to another, kind of thing. You know it’s called unemployment, in the academic world and you know if the academic world finds value in it, looking on, while I’m addressing the world as a whole, that’s up to them. So that’s what I have to say about that. I think, too, that the way academia works is that younger people think that they will sell out now just a little bit in order to get tenure so that then can say something, which is why they wanted to be in academia in the first place and what happens is, that process destroys in you the very possibility of becoming the person who will have anything to say by the time that time comes.

Female voice #4:

I didn’t mean academia is in any way special, I don’t think it is, I just think it’s one way …

Catharine MacKinnon:

Indeed.

Female voice #4:

I take your point … compromise … the very thing you’re compromising to attain … I just wondered what the hell you do … that vision of the world is so dark … atrocity … and the experience of it … is there some some maneuver that we can make that doesn’t include having to do battle with men …

Catharine MacKinnon:

Well, I actually think it’s kind of important to, and indeed to, how to say it, I think one gets a lot of self-respect out of having integrity and that that gives you a kind of energy, it isn’t called doing battle with people around you all the time, it’s called not letting every atrocity just go by you. I think a tremendous amount of women’s energy in particular goes into denying atrocities to women, and I deal with them very directly, absolutely all the time, and you know people are always asking me, you know, how can you, like, do this, and I’m like, how can you, like, not? And I don’t mean that as a moral stand, I mean that as a stand of how much of your energy is going into denying what’s going on around you, how much of it is going into holding down, holding in, shutting up, squishing, compressing, flattening yourself inside yourself? You know, you get a tremendous amount of energy out of actually letting it in and flowing back with it, letting it go through you, and feeling what it really feels like, and being changed by it, and knowing what you know and saying it and finding ways to say it and push back against it and work around it and you get a tremendous amount of energy from actually — you know, Andrea once said to me, and it like shocked me totally, to death, I think she published it, that she, how’d she say, that she had recently come to think, it’s something she learned largely from me, she said, that women have a right to be effective. Now, I had never thought of it that way, you know, but I think that we do. Like, we live here, too. And that understanding that we have a right to occupy space and, you know, to speak out and to say what we see, and that that isn’t the same thing as doing battle all the time as if you’re just, you know, smashing your head against a brick wall. It’s actually engaging with the life of your own time, as opposed to acting like you weren’t even there. [applause]

Male voice #2:

I learned one thing from Andrea, that I attribute to Andrea, and I probably mangled it a little bit, and it’s not repeated, and I wouldn’t even be able know where to find it, maybe you could help me with this, that she said that biological superiority is the world’s most dangerous idea

Catharine MacKinnon, in unison: is the world’s most dangerous idea

Male voice #2:

Where is it?

Catharine MacKinnon:

It’s in Our Blood somewhere, it’s somewhere in Our Blood, I’m certain it is.

Male voice #2:

Yeah.

Catharine MacKinnon:

John, do you know where it is?

John Stoltenberg:

I think it might be on line, actually, it might be on line.

Catharine MacKinnon:

Yeah, look in Nikki’s website. You know Nikki’s website?

Other voices in the room:

Nikki Craft’s website. The website is on the postcard. … ironically, … I was the one, we were asked, I think, for favorite quotes, and that was one that I …

Catharine MacKinnon:

About the delusion of sexual polarity and …oh, no right … about biological determinism being the world’s most dangerous idea, yeah, see now, sociobiologists …

John Stoltenberg:

I don’t want to put you on the spot, and this might be a topic for a conversation, rather than a Q & A session, but since there are a lot of teachers, or people who teach here, and the one time Andrea taught was at the University of Minnesota, she co-taught with you, and I don’t know a lot about that time, because she was in Minneapolis and I was in New York…

Catharine MacKinnon:

And she missed you very much.

John Stoltenberg:

Ah. [pause] The question was,

Catharine MacKinnon:

I remember that.

John Stoltenberg:

what you learned while teaching together, about teaching. [pause]

I think that’s my question. I think I just want to know what it was.

Catharine MacKinnon:

Yeah. Well, one really major thing we learned was that we thought that we could teach a course on pornography, and, of course, you can’t teach on a subject that isn’t there, you know. I mean, in other words, it would be like teaching about a novel and not reading the novelist. So, and, indeed, sometimes, … one’s novels … but in any case, the way we organized it was: if I’m the court, here’s the pornography, and here’s the law on this pornography, which is usually just so way wacked out, beside the point–the second, of the first, you know, it’s highly instructive, so here’s the pornography, here’s the law on the pornography, here’s the pornography, here’s the law on the pornography, and we went all the way through, Playboy to Snuff, you know, and everything in between. And what we learned is that to say pornography violates women was not excessive, and it was not a metaphor. That, what was happening was that our students were in traumatic stress, on week-by-week basis, and, indeed, a couple of them had psychotic breaks, one when she … we actually had child pornography, and that was assigned, as well, and she, just in the way one of the children in the child pornography looked, or turned, or something, suddenly, she remembered having been sexually abused on a stage when she was a child, not too long before, and pornography had been made of her. Anyway, that was her … there were five or six people who had extremely serious psychological consequences from this, and the whole class was this cumulation of traumatic stress over the term and so we learned that we can’t, you can’t do what we thought you could do and we learned how much … that’s what we learned about teaching, was that you can’t do this, you know, unless you want to violate your students, and pornography violating women was not hyperbole. And it was not an approximation. And this was before there had been any real studies on the effects on women of consuming pornography, but the men were as messed up and harmed by it as the women. There were lots of men in that class, and that’s one thing we learned–that you can’t ever assume that you control the context more than the pornography does. That the pornography is its own context. That’s what we learned. You’re surrounded by critique! You’re surrounded by law! You’re surrounded by whatever, you know, but it is still going to do what it does. And it did it. We learned that. We also learned from the people who snuck in, who weren’t at the university, and just came in and sat in the back, and the people who were, that … first of all, that some of them, in particular, the .. I mean, Andrea had always known this, but we both learned it all over again, in a whole other way, that when people … first of all, that prostituted women know everything, and that if and when their visions can be brought out, and applied that whatever it is you need to know is something that they already know. And there were numbers of them, and that there’s something about the organizing potential of the issue of pornography in relation to prostitution that broke open in that class, and has gone forward, ever since. Now we learned that about teaching, as well, both in the university, and in a university within a city. And it also turned out, then, eventually to be a lot of the people who were our students who became the organizers for the ordinance that she and I ended up writing, out of the process of our teaching together. Just a couple things that occur to me.

Female voice #5:

… I’m a radical feminist .. (unintelligible). it is dark times, difficult times .. now … don’t by any means have the answer . (unintelligible) .. to go out to just talk to people we encounter . (unintelligible).. thank you so much …

Catharine MacKinnon:

Thank you. Andrea wanted respect for her work. And this conference has that. So thank you.

Clare Chambers:

If there aren’t any more questions at this point in the presentation, on which to end. We do have a drinks reception in the common room, to which you are all very, very welcome, and I hope you will. And let us end by thanking you all for coming, and thank you again, Catharine MacKinnon.

[applause]

#Resistance Strategy and Struggle #radical feminism

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