Tumgik
#.. I love privacy and security lol.. and I always feel that ONE day I am going to have a question that has not already been asked on a foru
icewindandboringhorror · 10 months
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I’m always paranoid of my tumblr being deleted or malfunctioning or something like that someday, so here’s other places to find me/follow me, just in case lol
~ instagram - https://www.instagram.com/lucalicatte/
~ main youtube - https://www.youtube.com/c/LucaLiCatte
~ games/sims youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@cloudycatte
~ facebook page (I rarely use this because I hate facebook but.. it at least allows text posts better than instagram does, so idk maybe I’d use it more if tumblr went away? lol) - https://www.facebook.com/cloudycatteart/
~ Other Links (stuff I don’t use often/isn’t Main enough to list here, like twitter, neopets, other tumblr sideblogs, youtube channels, etc.) are here - http://icewindandboringhorror.tumblr.com/otherlinks )
#An updated version of this since some of the links on the old one are no longer the same lol#I might make a website website one day (not with a custom domain since I'm not paying for that/dont have the money lol#but like a 'my name.weebly.com type thing lol) but I haven't had the time recently. If I ever get around to it I'll update the post and#reblog that version. ANYWAY.. I just like to have one of these written out to reblog every once in a while. During the once ever few months#when poeple are like 'tumblr is failing again! it wont survive!' which has happened like 80 times but I'm still always like :0c what if!#also love the ms paint art done with a mouse ghhj#ANYWAY.. also if you want to see the stinky game I made that's not actually related to my own worldbuilding really (why I have never#posted anything about it publilcy because it's like.. how do I talk about it lol) I have my itch.io linked in the 'other links' page#as well as my General Projects blog. which talks about all the ongoing and upcoming projects I want to do that are#actually set in my world and can give you previews of some of the things I'm working on. Currently resuming my Game after abandoning it#basically for the entire pandemic and a little before that - as mentioned before - so that's OUgh.. in terms of A Lot Of Work#Especially since while kind of 'revamping and updating' I want to add a few features which are mostly easy but every once in a while#I don't understand something and it's like....... hGGhh...... Ironically despite Blogging I just hate talking to people in public open foru#.. I love privacy and security lol.. and I always feel that ONE day I am going to have a question that has not already been asked on a foru#somewhere and I am going to have to post myself and.. no.. I shan't even imagine it.. It's not even really social anxiety it's just like..#efficiency.. instead of wating like days to get an accurate response and resolve the problem with the general public I would rather just ha#e a one time 30min conversation with an expert and resolve it quickly. PLUS then I also only interact with One stranger instead of Many Of#Them lol.. any 6+ yrs of experience Ren'py experts hmu so I can pay you like $50 to have a single 45min conversation#with me over an insanely simple question and then never talk to you again until a year later when I have a second question. hhjb#ANYWAY.. I still really don't like instagram or it's layout and I never understood how it works like.. if I should be tagging photos or wha#or how you really use it and I just... euGH... stimky.. but it is one of the most popular so I feel obligated to link it. I wish facebook w#sn't such a nasty poo poo because I do actually like the variety of posts you can make and how Pages on facebook operate. In the scense of#it being similar to tumblr that you can make a VARIETy of styles of post. not just Only Post Photos or Only Short Text or Only Video which#is still like.. how the funk does sutff like that even get popular lol.. the Limited nature.. hewwo.. but alas.. and NO way I'm touching#fucking Threads please do not make an account on there and don't let your friends do it and don't let that shit catch on lol.#BUT YEahg... links...... just in case.. i hope tumblr stays aroundin it's current format forever though lol..#I'm pretty sure even facebook doesn't have audio posts. or tags the way this does. or CHRONOLOGICAL FEED. custom html for pages.. aaaaa
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kanmom51 · 1 year
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Thank you for the time you put into this wonderful blog. I am an "old" fan of jikook, I have a son JMs age and a queer trans son as well so my heart breaks on a regular basis for these men not being able to live their authentic selves. The last verse in Letter about it being scary and them being afraid but they can be together has brought me to motherly tears more than once.
Curious for your opinion if JKs building the "fortress" is to give them the privacy they need. Secondarily, could they have said they were platonic roommates from the beginning or is that not typical in Korea?
Sending mom love!
Thanks for reaching out.💜💜
It's interesting to see what connects each and every one of us to BTS as a whole and to JM and JK in particular. I think that you and I are kind of similar in that respect. Seeing them, accepting them, also through the eyes of mothers with children that have to deal with these day to day struggles.
This part of Letter:
Don’t worry By your side just stay yeah Because we don’t know what days await us, Though it’s scary, though we’re afraid Never forget that we’re together
Definitely brings me to tears EVERY SINGLE TIME I hear it. And that's A LOT.
JK's fortress. I love that you call it that and I do hope that it turns out to be one. A fortress to keep out those crazy fans that don't understand what the concept of privacy is, nor do they understand boundaries between fan and artist.
Do I think this is something he's building for the two of them?
I want to.
I want to think that come 2025 or whenever it is that they get out of the military, that they will feel that they can do what they want to, no fear, nothing holding them back.
He could be planning on reselling (probably would have sold it as is and not put in the money and time to build up a new place instead of the old one). He could be building this for his parents (plausible but again not probable). Another possibility would be building an apartment building and selling the apartments, but that would have been made public knowledge by now. So my money is on it being built for himself.
And I find it hard to believe he's building this monstrosity just for himself to live there alone.
I want to think that this big ass house being built is meant to be their future home. With the privacy and security they need to feel safe.
Time will tell I guess.
If this does become JK's home and if JM will be living there with him, it will be something hard to hide long term, even with the best security possible. It always comes out. The truth about 9-1 did, the same with Brunnen.
And that brings us back to: if they are planning this, what does it mean about Jikook post MS?
As for your question about platonic roommates.
Well, yeah, they could be, if they weren't multimillionaires I guess, lol.
Look, I think that at a certain age, which would probably be post college age, so late 20s to early 30s, same sex roommates that behave the way those two do with each other, will clearly be side eyed as more than roommates.
And add the multimillionaire factor to it, it would be REALLY strange and kind of obvious that they aren't just roommates.
The two of them living together as roommates most likely didn't feel plausible for them even back when they all started moving out of the dorms because even then it was clear that they are more than that.
So no, roommates cover not a cover for them, lol.
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heich0e · 9 months
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if you've sent in an ask lately that i didn't respond to, it may be answered under the cut! i'll be dividing these posts up by general subject matter so no one has to scroll for too long to find any asks they may have sent. feel free to block the tag #liv got mail if you don't like seeing posts like this. i'm sorry to have kept you waiting, and p.s. i love you very much <3
part two: general inquiries ✉
✉ Anonymous asked: omg liv did you watch the barbie movie
I HAVENT SEEN IT YET!!! when i tell u that everything that can happen in a lifetime has happened to me in the past 14 calendar days i am NOT!! KIDDING!! but i have plans to go see it with two of my best friends (either this weekend or early next week) and we've all secretly planned pink outfits and we're going out for drinks too it's going to be SOOOOOOOOO FUN!! oh how i love being a woman!!
✉ Anonymous asked: Liv i got my underarms waxed and it hurt. Have you ever gotten your underarms waxed? If so did you bleed a bit? Cause I did and I wanna know if that’s normal lol
i've gotten waxes but not my underarms but a quick google told me pinpoint bleeding is probably ok?? that being said i am about the LEAST qualified person on this beautiful earth to whom u could direct this question. what's next? questions about cars?? taxes?? i am not smart enough 4 this!!
✉ Anonymous asked: Liv is it true that your work can access all your social media accounts thru your email? If so, I may need to make another acc
hi friend i am no cyber security whiz by any means but i always operate under the assumption that anything that comes into or goes out of or is in anyway linked to a company email BELONGS to the company. i treated my college email the same way. even using company wifi is dicey in terms of privacy, so just use your best judgement and i would advise that it's always better to err on the side of caution <3
✉ Anonymous asked: real talk liv how long after sending a text should i stop waiting for a reply back because i feel like a sad SIMP
u know what i am probably biased here bc i am TRULY the worst texter in the world. my phone has been on do not disturb since at least 2019. i do not wish to be contacted ever (unless i'm texting u first in which case i expect an immediate response tysm xo)
with that in mind, i think it's not fair to CONSTANTLY expect immediate communication bc a lot of factors play into that (work, social lives, sleep, time actively trying to be unplugged, current mental state, etc.) HOWEVER!! when it comes to romantic dalliances (which i am interpreting this as and i'm sorry if i'm misreading) i think there's kind of fair expectation of communication if interest if reciprocated. i know it's so cringe n cliche but the whole "if they wanted to they would" thing has at least a vein of truth in it, so if you feel like ur energy/effort isn't being met (especially if it was previously and this is a sudden change) i think that's always a bit of a red flag. maybe not red. yellow? or like a deep yellow veering on orange.
sending u love little guy and wishing u all the best!! u deserve to be the SIMPEE not the SIMPER <3
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itsjustsun · 1 year
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When the hermit finally speaks.
You know I do this often disappearing into the night & hiding. I’m always gonna be like this. The truth is the world scares me. Not really my world, but the reality of the world is really scary. A lot of us aren’t really ourselves at all so I retreat. It’s my way of protecting myself and being intimate. The absolute right to privacy. A big part of me find myself chasing these ideals that’s not even remotely destined to happy for me. So many possibilities and so many dreams. I guess the reality of my life the things I thought I wanted I don’t want. What I want the most is peace & the ability to have a strong peace of mind. Mentally I’m fucked. Just like the rest of us. And I finally don’t have this fear of just not existing not being this thing or portraying this fantasy. I want reality. Simplicity. Security. Stability. And love. I’m not craving nothing else if those things come from self it comes from self. If it comes from my work situation it comes from there. I know I have hella possibilities and hella opportunities to explore certain things, but I guess my question is why now? Why the fuck now? I don’t wanna rack my brain on what on when on how. Feel like resting on just calling in gratitude what’s here and in reality all I’m gonna do is grow some shit and be alone. I guess the truth is it’s hard to feel beautiful in a world so cold. It’s hard to simply understand and I get it. I’m beginning to, but that lack of awareness has created a lot of pain at one point. I guess my luxuries in life is different. I don’t really see myself living too luxurious as far as material just comfortable and happy. It’s actually very tearful life is beautiful very beautiful and all phases of life to me and I’m no longer choosing to identify with the struggle. Life is beautiful.
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Honestly just trying to find the time to pick up a new book I’ve been wanting to read or just take all day to cook one meal as I sip wine or whatever, but work is calling. The time I’ve had for recovery has been beautiful incredibly beautiful and I’m eternally grateful for it. I’m grateful for the love. I’m grateful for just all of the opportunities I am sincerely blessed and i acknowledge it. I’m not living this woah is me. I have a lot and that in itself is a blessing.
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You know your boy has been slacking. Drinking. Enjoying myself but now it’s time to buckle back down on this health routine. I have some body goals and life goals tbh I’m manifesting. Step 1: is complete and wherever I go next I would love to settle even if it’s not completely at least for a while. Get to know what living slow feels like. You know becoming my own boss the grind is slow very slow, but it’s welcoming and I actually enjoy it. Starting a new job hopefully soon(just completed my background check) I just wanna make my money and dip. Lol. I dropped my cashapp below if anyone just wanted to help out a bit in this trying times. Lol. Working since a baby I now understand why my mom wanted me to enjoy my youth not only that, but also why she wanted to preserve it even tho my childhood was far from normal. Someone asked me a question on my NGL. Who do I miss the most? My mom. In real life you know I’m known to be this beacon of light, but bro that shit hurts. I remember just being separated how painful that was for me now her passing. To loose the only person you feel you could trust. I miss her. I wish I could hug her. I wish I could’ve experienced my mom in ways others got to with their mother. She loved the fuck out of us, but work, mothering & being drunk in love which is beautiful & inspiring life got in the way of our relationship sometimes. It’s funny how she still teaches me even with her not being here. To always move with love even in the presence of pain, fear, sovereignty and union. It’s just crazy to me. You know she wasn’t a saint mama had a real nasty and cruel side. But she loved and loved hard and loved on everyone around her. I guess when you’re used to just loosing ppl I’m used to people just falling from my grip. It’s the willingness to really be a part of the world kinda begins to fade. Honestly even thoughts of no longer existing in the world. I’m just like meh to the charades. Tired of ppl feeling like we have to pretend we don’t. We don’t and that’s what I’m learning. It’s oh fucking kay. But the truth of her loss makes me feel angry, it makes me sad, it makes me upset bc I didn’t feel like she got the justice she deserved. It hurts a lot. I can’t even explain. You know how you know things you can’t even say or the horrors you’d have to admit to yourself. It comes with a lot of guilt and shame. It comes with a lot of uncertainty how the fuck do I deal with all of this without the need to distract.
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Gardening helps deal with the pain. The mental trauma that I keep having flashbacks about. I’m just helps slows the mind. My mind is always racing it’s like I can’t stop it and I know it comes from internalizing everything I kinda don’t speak on a lot. Really bc I don’t have the proper surroundings you know. I’m used to being the one with the level head those can speak too. I don’t have that. You know that was my mom as I was for her. Very level headed my peers, friends, and acquaintances are as well, but some are just not in the same phase of life at all. Those that are we talk we love on each other, but it’s just really hard to trust fr. I don’t trust myself truthfully and I’m done with the fantasies. I’m done being a fantasy and I’m done building a fantasy. Only real shit. Honestly when everything around is built on a fantasy it would never last and it time we stop treating ourselves like that. From our sex to our career or just general lifestyle it’s all a fantasy. The only thing that is important is the way we love & the fact that we’re living. How you been living? Good?Well I hope so.
Email for any booking info: [email protected]
Cashapp:
$222sun
-Sun
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rumblelibrary · 3 years
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hello!! i saw requests are open and i was wondering how zemo would react to seeing their nonbinary/fem presenting partner in a suit for the first time! i get kind of insecure about if people will find me attractive when im masc rather than fem, so it’d mean a lot! also maybe there can be a suitkovia reference somewhere LOL
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Perfectly Suited [Baron Helmut Zemo x Nonbinary/Fem presenting!Reader]
Word count: 1.3k
Warnings: get ready to be loved and spoiled by our best sugar daddy
Author’s note: I hope I managed to get through your wishes, thank you for allowing me to do so
Baron Helmut Zemo was many things, but there were two particular things he liked to regard himself: a man with an exquisite taste and the deepest adoration to his partner.
He was one of those men from another time, he loved, he loved completely, devotedly, without limits.
He loved you with a passion that nobody could deny, it was vibrant, electric, he didn’t need to show pda, just to see you two together proved his care.
He would give all the best to you and only the best, and that’s how you would only eat in the best places, find yourself sleeping only in the silkiest sheets and go to a tailor for any piece of clothing you needed.
Too much? Always not enough in Zemo’s eyes.
He was old fashioned on this: a piece of clothing had to fit like a glove, to suit your habits and not the habits of the mass market, and you better not start him on that  topic because he could go on for ages about how the quality of clothing just mirrors the quality of society.
Nevertheless, you’d benefit of all the best tailors of the world, anything you desired, you’d just have to book an appointment with Zemo’s name and you’d be settled.
On that particular evening you asked him to be present for your final fitting, you didn’t tell him what it was but he guessed it must have been something special because it took time.
As you walked into the shop he smiled at you leaning his hand on the lower of your back.
“Show me darling, I can’t wait” he said as he took off his coat moving to a private room reserved for the fittings.
Mirrors and flowers everywhere, the place smelled heavenly and you grew to love it with time.
“Today is the day” the old tailor told you with a big smile, he grew excited with you, he wasn’t a young man and didn’t understand a thing about the whole concepts of ‘modern sexuality’, but he knew clothing, he knew how what you wear can bring you the highest or the lowest.
He hanged your little surprise and left you to change.
You nodded at him as the excitement was taking over you, but also the worry.
What if he doesn’t like it? What if he refuses that side of you? Yes, all good but this is too far? He paid big money for it, what if it is not right to his eyes?
What if he has no reaction at all? Is that good or bad?
You undressed quietly and slipped into your new suit, you smiled instinctively as just wearing it made you feel confident and alive.
You looked up at yourself in the mirror as you laced up the shirt buttons and you indeed liked yourself, you wanted to wear it always, everyday. 
You put on the jacket and buttoned it up, a little move from side to side to take in every angle before calling the tailor in.
“I am so good at my job” he chuckled as he adjusted a bit the position of the shoulders and instructed you about how the sleeve of the shirt has to show in a certain way outside of a jacket.
“That’s how you understand if a jacket is perfect for your arms” he explained and he was always covering you in little trivia.
He knew you were nervous, so he tried to distract you.
“Ring the bell when you want me to come” he said as from your changing room you’d get to where Zemo was sitting, chilling on the big sofa, legs spread comfortably as he sipped his glass of ‘welcome champagne’ while going through some catalogues stocked in there.
When the door opened he closed The catalogue looking up at you.
He blinked for a moment as you squirmed under his watch 
“Can you do a turn for me?”
He asked moving his finger and you did as asked, a vague sense of nausea and fear taking over you.
He stared at you, the moment you gave him your back the most nerve-racking. When you gained back your starting position he gulped down in one shot the drink he had and left the empty glass aside unceremoniously before standing up.
In your mind, you were already consoling yourself over the fact that it was another time when you will just have to accept things.
“Y/N”
You looked up at him as he called your name.
“You’re so handsome” he said, his eyes shining, a Cheshire Cat kind of smile taking over his lips as he kissed you enjoying the privacy of the moment.
“Y-You do?”
You asked surprised pulling back from that kiss, still doubtful, you got so ready to hear a rejection that you didn’t allow yourself to foresee the amazing smile he was gifting you now. He touched on your sides and up onto your shoulders, the dark fabric slipping through his fingers as he observed you closely before meeting your eyes again.
“Darling” he scolded you gently with that nickname “you even doubted I would love to see you suited up for me?” He asked and you looked down, his hand slowly moving under your chin to make you look up again
“Never look down” he said, his hazel eyes burning holes into you “Remember always: you are the one that makes the rules, you can do everything you want, dress as you want, don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t wear something or do something. If that makes you happy, if that makes you be you, then it is perfect”
You felt emotional as his smile triggered you to smile back, your eyes tearing up a bit.
“Hey, listen to me, I might be right for once, you’re talking to a man with a collection of fur collared coats who doesn’t care at all”
You chuckled, because it is true, you even have got one just for his own pleasure.
“All good?”
You smiled looking at him and you nodded, his arms making you feel safe and secure, that mixed with the power suit you were wearing you felt even bold.
He did a very secure nod before leaning in to ring the bell on the side
“We have only one problem now” he said and you looked at him puzzled.
What is wrong now? You looked down at yourself instinctively.
The tailor came inside smiling warmly, happy to see you two in a cuddly moment
“How you find my job, Sir?”
“Impeccable, as always” Zemo said “but this is an evening suit”
Zemo moved on your side touching onto your jacket, the closeness of him, his warm attentions being a gift for you.
“We need at least two day suits, one in linen for the summer and one for the winter, something thick like Harry’s Tweed” he explained as the man took note “and of course something else for special evenings” he added looking at you.
“Please, I’ll show you the fabrics” 
The tailor said to you motioning you to follow him to his table so he could show you all the books with the textiles.
“Perfect, we don’t have much time, so pick wisely, I’ll schedule another appointment soon”
Zemo said checking his watch and you looked at him, once more, very surprised because you had no following appointment.
He smirked leaning to your ear “You don’t expect me to watch you in a suit and not bring you out for dinner” You smiled at him.
“Helmut…” you murmured but many words couldn’t just allow you to express ho much it meant to be accepted, to be even liked in the way he does “Thank you”
He smiled “I love you” he said, as simple as it is “now go pick your fabrics or I won’t be able to wait for the dinner to be over to reach the second idea that suit gave me”
Tagged @cazzyimagines​ @lieutenantn​ @handmaiden-of-mischief​ @thesunflowersutra​ @zemomybeloved​​ @fictionlandslanddreams​ @charistory​ @greeneyedblondie44​ @apparrio​ @hb8301​ @whatawildone​
Let me know if you want to get tagged too <3
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akaashisupremacy · 3 years
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Sunset Drives
Summary: Having broken off your engagement for an arranged marriage with Gojo, your relationship is in shreds. As you and Gojo try to pick up the pieces, what does healing look like for the two of you? 
Gojo Satoru  x reader
Multi-fandom Masterlist || HQ Masterlist || Ao3 version
Genre: ANGST AND PINING, exes to friends to ??, commitment issues lol, some fluff if you wink (wc: 1k)   
“Let’s go for a walk down the beach.” Gojo Satoru insists out of the blue.
After a long day of work regarding the security updates for Jujutsu Tech, you agree. Gojo has always been spontaneous. He’s not one to make extensive plans.
The sky is quickly turning orange and purple as the car parks near the sand. You welcome the sea breeze when the door opens and the golden light coats both of you.
“We haven’t had a walk like this in a long time, just the two of us. At least one outside of the school.” you comment.
“Hardly a surprise. We were barely on speaking terms,” he retorts.
“And now we’re fixing things.” you smile with a skip of hope in your tone.
Gojo pauses before replying in a murmur, “We are.”
Ten years after your teenage break-up of your arranged marriage engagement, you’re both finally starting to find peace. Earlier this year you were both screaming and crying and hurting as you aired out your bottled up feelings and hurt. Things are finally settling down at last.
“This is nice,” he adds as if reading your thoughts.
You’re both in thick windbreaker jackets. Despite your weatherproof clothes, Gojo’s polo shirt collar peaks through his jacket. He’s dressed up today: leather shoes, slacks and his sunglasses instead of his eye covers. He looks good, handsome even.
You both take a moment to look into the ocean. He puts an arm around your shoulder and draws you in. His grip is gentle and firm.
“When I said I wanted to go to the beach, I meant during summer, you know?” you turn to him.
“We can come back during the summer. It’s near enough to drive.” he assures.
“Really?” you quirk a brow.
“Really.” he nods with a grin.
You both continue walking, kicking up a bit of sand here and there.
“I thought I would hate you the rest of my life because I wasn’t sure I could separate my feelings for you from my familial duties.” he exhales.
It’s your turn to pause.
“It’s ok, Gojo, you can say it.”  you murmur, “We’re really happy right now. Whatever this is.”
He lets out a low chuckle
“I like having you in my life again,” he says.
. Your eyes are peaceful and a small smile forms at the edge of your lips.
He turns to you, about to lean in for a kiss when you hear voices coming from the back.
“Gojo-sensei, is that you?” wonders Itadori out loud.
Gojo winces and quickly plants a peck on the tip of your ear before turning to his students. A group of first and second year students are walking together led by one of the Zenin girls. She must be Maki.
“Yes.” he says, “Who else?”
“And you ex…wife?” Itadori tries to recall.
“Fiancée .” you correct, amused, “We never made it to the altar.”
You steal a glance at Gojo’s unreadable expression.
“You’re too beautiful for sensei. Is that why you broke up?” asks a spunky girl with short brown hair. This must be Kugisaki Nobara.
“Nobara, you shouldn’t say that in front of Gojo-sensei.” nudged Itadori.
You and Gojo look at each other as if exchanging an inside joke.
“Something like that.” you grin.
“I would argue that was really the least of our problems.” Gojo snorts crossing his arms.
“Excuse the two of them.” Fushiguro bows.
Maki reigns the rest of the group in order to return your privacy with their teacher. Gojo keeps his hands off you the rest of the walk. You feel slightly disappointed.
When you return to the car, you empathize with his reactions to his students. Sometimes they forget he has a life outside of them.
“Thanks for today.” you nod, strapping in your seatbelt
“You can save that for later. It’s not time for goodbyes just yet.” he waves lightly, “If you like the beach so much, you should come visit me more often. I’ll drive you down here.”
“I don’t want to take up more of your time.” you demure, “Besides you’re not one to be good at promises.”
“I will always make time for you.” he glances at you, eyes fully certain, “and I’ve been better at promises now that I’m older. You’ll see. You’re not the only one that’s changed.”
Before he gets the engine going, he leans into you for a kiss. You place a hand at his chest to steady yourself. He presses a little harder. His hand finds itself on the side of your cheek. Your hands gently brush away the sides of his hair. The kiss long and tender, neither of you in a hurry to be apart.
When you finally pull away, you ask.
“Is this the part where we drive off into the sunset?”
“Yes.” he says, slowly backing the car out of its slot.
“Maybe you had a different person in your mind but I guess, you get me today.” you joke.
“You don't know that.” he replies without skipping a beat.
Gojo Satoru is the man who has everything. Whether you’ll be by each other's side temporarily or forever, he doesn’t know. With you by his side, there is nothing else he could ask for.
“I am happy.” he nods to you. You’re surprised he brings it up again.
“Whatever this is,” he adds.
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I wrote this as a follow up for another Gojo x reader fic who used to be engaged. This was supposed to be the last chapter but I have some extra material (fluff to help heal all the hurt I put us thru lol). 
Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 || Part 8
Comment or message to be added to the taglist! :D
Series Taglist: @tokyo-love-hotel @samkysnks @herownescape @cherrianne192 @shamelessdonutsludgebanana @kageyamakock@shirostrbl @luvang3l @cloudsinthecosmos @httpjungoo @saturnki  @itstheee-ha-chan @gucci-froggy @soy1melk @dora-the-grownup @cherryonigiri If you’d like to continue being part of my taglist (JJK or Haikyuu), please let me know! I also write oneshots for both fandoms and soon I’ll be doing BSD too!
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wroteclassicaly · 3 years
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Waves of Blue (Andy Dolan x Reader)
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Warnings: Language, smut, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, rough sex, hair pulling, face slapping, slight choking, mentions of drug usage, & angst.
A/N : AAAAAAHHHHH! I have found the post that teaches you how to add a read more on mobile! Shoutout to the person who told me about that! You know who you are! ^_^ Anyways, I am so gonna be posting more, even if it’s harder because I have to write the fics on my phone, versus my laptop, lol. I stumbled across the song Waves of Blue by Majid Jordan, and my ass was emotional af (I have included some of the lyrics here in blue!) I obviously don’t own the song/lyrics!
The song was the kick one of my drafts needed for extra inspiration! And so, I bring you the start of this mini fic! It won’t be very many chapters. And I will probably re-visit for a prequel, to write out how the reader and Andy first hooked up. But I wanted to try something different and start my fic with their relationship already ongoing. Hopefully it doesn’t suck, haha.?
I haven’t felt this inspired for a Cody character since Michael Langdon! I adore Andy’s traumatic, cocky, angsty, hot mess ass! And I really wanna explore the creativity he’s bringing me! Lemme know what y’all think? And give the song a listen - I’m in in love with it!
Forgive me if there’s some mistakes, loves! I’m nervous about how I’ve written Andy, and how the smut is. Hope y’all enjoy anyways!
:)
~*~
The rain is a glittering array of shimmering moisture as its presence is pouring down on the roof of your apartment. Your knees are knocked tightly together, jean fabric digging into flesh. Your phone is perched face down atop your legs, vibrating messages you don’t care to read. They’re not the ones that you want to see. You tilt your head back, the tears redirecting themselves down the sides of your cheeks. You turn your gazing direction to that silk robe atop your bed - a reminder.
“It’s just a fling, love.”
But it can’t be, can it?
You have to laugh at yourself. Isn’t this what every girl asks themselves when they’re dumped? Rare is an exception who steals the other person’s heart and changes that exterior they carry. Your phone vibrates again and that raging anger to match the ruby red color on his robe that rests on your bedroom sheets - it charges your energy like a violent strike of lightening! Your hand launches your phone into the hallway outside your bedroom door before you can stop yourself.
“There’s your fucking fling, dumbass Andy Dolan!”
You try to hum to fight off the incoming intrusive thoughts, to ignore your ringing phone in the distance, but it’s to no avail. You’re getting more overwhelmed with the pain by every agonizing second. Your fists clench into the leather armrests below. It’s too much, you can’t bear another second of this shit. It doesn’t matter that it’s raining, it doesn’t matter that you have over fifteen unanswered recent calls from Andy since you threw your phone - unbeknownst to you.
You snatch the stupid silk robe from its place and begin your knowing journey with the excruciatingly expensive item, having already made up your mind. A quick removal of your keys from the hooks beside your front room door and your bare feet seem to lead you - heart first - into the downpour. Your clothing is soaked the instant you step outside. Mumbling all the way to your SUV and clutching Andy’s silk garment becomes your saving grace to help anchor your focus. If one can be focused in bare feet during a thunderstorm, erratically throwing her car into reverse.
The drive to his place of privacy - his sanctuary - the cold place you once used to help him warm. It doesn’t take you long. With your tires grinding against soaking asphalt, country beach roads whipping past you, and your angry windshield wipers struggling to keep up with your car’s pace - Andy’s gates come into your sights. You’re trembling, too upset and geared to go for a turn around now. Andy didn’t change the security, so you let yourself in, abandoning your car just inside, doors open and interior carelessly being soaked.
It doesn’t matter. I just have to tell him this.
That’s your mantra for continuous approach. You round the long expanse of beautiful greenery, waves crashing violently in the distance, a love affair to collide with this storm. Your simple outfit of blue jeans and a baby blue tank top are beyond recognition, weighted down by the sopping wet summer. The shivering begins to thrum along to an invisible, but very present humming inside you. It’s that feeling, the one you know all too well.
Andy Dolan.
Like when you first met, you begin to tremble, letting your limbs move you accordingly. Making sense is last on the priority list. Normally, you would have a thousand conversational scenarios laid out, but that’s not the case. Rushed on purely raw need to tell him - no - inform him, that is what is in charge here. The soft grass is squishy between your toes, a tickle from each freshly mowed blade, water in the distance smelling like salt and flowing freedom.
Every sense is heightened for you right now. Your limbs are heavy, yet your footfalls are light, carrying you with a quick grace. You don’t bother with the front door, opting for his usual back door hang out. It’s a few more minutes before your destination is reached. That’s when you hear him screaming, his voice in high distress, hard and rough against the accent. Your chest heaves to cage hammering heartbeats that you can’t keep up with.
“Motherfucking ANSWER ME!” He shouts, ripping the phone from his ear to redial.
You rolls your eyes, assuming it’s a dealer, or whomever he would rather be with than you. After all, he’s the one who said he just needed an ideal situation, not a relationship.
“Y/N... come on, don’t be a fucking cunt! I need to tell you something, please!”
Almost on cue the song drops loud on his fancy speakers in the house, freezing you to your spot.
I wanna hold you close
Don't wanna let you go
Be with you night and day
'Cause I've been feeling so low
Don't have to ask me twice
You really take me there
I wanna touch your light
I wanna breathe in your air
Andy angrily taps at his phone again, almost growling, reminding you of a wild animal. That’s when you’re snapped into your remaining senses, moving up and onto his deck, standing just feet from him. It takes him a few seconds to look up and see you through the rain. You can’t bring yourself to go any closer, afraid to let go right away. That’s how it is with Andy, you always give in.
You cut him off before he even gets a chance.
“Fuck you, Andy.”
Damn, was that really what you worked up the courage to dangerously drive yourself here to confess?
His lips purse a popping a noise, eyes widening in surprise at your word choices.
“I really fucking hate you.” Is what you give him, finding it easier to take steps now.
He still doesn’t speak as you approach, almost as if he’s recoiling. That wild animal within Andy Dolan. He’s not used to this. You can barely see through the rain, feeling like a moron. The movies make it look so dramatic, but you feel like you’re a wet dog on the verge of catching a cold.
It does good at numbing you though, almost shielding you from those haunting blue eyes. You swipe a hand across your face to clear your vision, and take that final step onto the deck with him, now just on the other side of where he stands in the doorway. That’s when he decides to speak, his voice softer than you’ve heard. It echoes his exhaustion, his surprise.
“You’re not the only one that feels that way, Y/N.”
You shake your head in disbelief, both of you not daring to make that closing gap. You would douse his body with yours; wet and cold. You’d be lying if you denied the shiver that attacked you, drawing your body in like a magnet - helpless to its every move.
“Don’t give me this kicked puppy front. We’re all human beings, Andy. And I didn’t fucking deserve you cutting your baggage open and just... dumping out whatever you felt like on me and then letting me go.”
Fuck.
He inhales sharply, head tilting in this sadness you seem to understand within the moment. It steals your breath, a pain punching your ribcage, causing your heartbeat to skip a few. Your jaw twitches as you turn away to gather your bearings, starting back down into the yard.
Why the fuck did I come here?
I'll be holding you tight
When the night is through
Andy takes a deep inhalation behind you and that catches you, dragging you right back. Before you know which end is up you’re turning back around and striding across the pool deck and right into your former lover. Andy meets you in the harsh rains, his hands cupping your neck so possessively, that you can’t remember a time where this hot mess of a man wasn’t bull dozing your life apart. You grasp his face in your palms, that unshaven stubble prickling your flesh. Your mouth meets his, his phone becoming ruined and forgotten as he lets it fall to the ground beside him.
His strong arms path down to encircle your waist, pulling you in from the weather, bunching your t-shirt up until it’s pooling around your tattered bra. You raise your arms to help him discard it, the heavy wet noise it makes when it collides with a nearby pool chair is enough to make Andy gain his surroundings.
“Stop, stop. Are you fucking high?” He asks you, a cautious pause.
You shake your head. “Aren’t you?”
This is when he scares you with a solemn silence you weren’t aware he could possess.
“Andy...” You push your fingers through his damp curls.
“No, I’m not. I was just about to... when you didn’t answer.”
Almost as if he can’t take revealing that bit of truth, he thumbs a bra strap down your shoulder - deliberately slow. Your skin stings with the line of goosebumps that it brings, your own hands struggling to push that stupid ass identical robe off his broad chest.
“I should fucking rip this.” You say, causing a smile to come from him.
“Rip it and I’ll put you on your knees.”
“Has that ever stopped you before?” A challenging look presses your features, but Andy intercepts, wrapping your hair around his fist and pulling your hair back. You feel the ache crack from the tips of your toes, hot wired into your cunt - direct express.
“You need more marks from me.” His mouth caresses your jawline, stubble catching the underside when his lips find your neck, a stimulation that you have become accustomed to craving.
His teeth bite down, a few seconds more where you feel him cleaning his evidence with a light set of kisses.
“There we go.” He scrapes his milky white teeth across your ear with a whisper so hot that you bow into him; knees weak.
Your bra is the next thing to fall somewhere, your jeans following. Andy doesn’t wait for you to even kick them off, his fingers sliding into your lace panties to see how much you still need him. He licks his lips, eyes closing in pleasure, a familiar stroking rhythm unraveling from the tips of his fingers.
“Shit, that’s a good girl. Even when you hate me you still need me, don’t you?”
The cockiness makes your wrist snap and palm collide with his cheek. You’re riled up, he’s riled up. Something you know he likes. “Like you fucking needed that?” Is your retort.
He groans out, a honey wet dip in his tone. “Only you can fucking touch me like that, Y/N.”
Lightening flashes through the darkened midnight skies, rain pounding across the surface of the pool to create a special beat. Andy finds your mouth in desperation once more, working your underwear down in a frustrated jerk. His fingers part your slick folds and ease into you without any warning. You look down to watch his strong forearm flex in its working marathon, back and forth between your thighs.
We'll be riding the tide in the sky so alive
On waves of blue (waves of blue)
I'm in love with the thought of being in love
In love with you (love with you)
You can bring me along for the rest of your life
If you wanted to (wanted to)
You let go and give into him, not daring to question why you came here in the first place. You know why. Andy has stopped his touches, watching you with that lowered stare he gives. His body is glowing from the neon lighting his home harbors, his creamy skin glistening with rain water. He’s hard through those silk pants, nothing left to the imagination.
“Take them off. Now.” You command him.
He can’t hide the greedy smirk that appears on his lips, not taking his eyes off you as his pants and boxers disappear in one go. He is gloriously hard and thick. You almost want to laugh at your cliche salivating tongue. Andy brushes your wet hair off your temple, his hands moving down your body in a tapping massage - reaching their target to hook behind your thighs.
He lifts you with ease, your legs wrapping around his waist. He’s panting rapidly, nosing your neck. He grips himself, teasingly stroking your cunt to gather your arousal. You stutter on an exhale, unable to breathe out properly. It’s jagged and broken, much like your rationality.
You stop him when he attempts to press inside you. “Tell me again,” You plead. He looks at you in confusion. “Say I’m just a fling.” You finish.
“Y/N...” He struggles.
“Before you fuck me, I want you to tell me what I mean to you, Andy.”
It’s hard not to just fucking forget this and let go, let him take you, both of you get what you want and not have to deal with anything else. But you need to hear it. You want to know how much you’re not worth anything to him. You need to hear it more than you need to find out how much you mean to him. That’s what you came here for...
His enriching ocean eyes are glossy with desire, with something else you can’t place. They pin you into a set of shakes. You grip the hair at his neck’s nape.
“Everything.” He says it all at once, bringing your hand down atop his to help him line up, as he fucks himself into your cunt, stretching you with that delicious drowning burn.
You're no good for me
You got what I need
I just wanna be with you
You cry out, vision sprinkled with an array of floating shapes. Andy drives you against the door, hips slamming so hard you know you’ll be bruised before the night is through. You keep one arm around his neck, lowering the other to encourage him to hurt you deeper, nails clawing at his lower back, shredding the skin. His face stays buried in your neck, stubble adding to each motion he makes inside. You cling tight, using all your strength.
It’s slippery, it’s unstable, you can barely hold onto one another, but you manage. And that moment when you finally can’t keep yourself up, Andy lets you slide down, bringing you into the floor of the doorway, lifting your legs onto his shoulders, pressing in so hard you can’t contain the tears that roll from the corner of your eyes, coasting. He’s familiarized himself with how you come undone, even before you knew.
“You’re drenching my cock, baby. You need to let it go?”
You don’t answer, causing him to grip your throat.
“When I ask you something I expect an answer. You remember how this works, don’t you?”
“Fuck, yes! Please, Andy!” You don’t pride yourself now.
He guides a hand across you, as if he’s tuning a fine instrument. Your stomach quivers with a passing of his fingertips, engaging in a butterfly filled stomach clench. You’re tensing up, anticipating. Desiring.
“Fucking do it! Show me how much you still need this...” He trails off, dropping to rest his chest against your breasts.
“Even if you don’t need me.” It’s a counter thought to your need to hear him say he doesn’t want you.
“I’ll always need you.” You push him onto his back with newfound strength, and pin his hands above his head, your hips bouncing so hard that you can feel his firm structure beneath. That’s right, this is exactly what you have to have.
He’s damn near whining now, squeezing your fingers tightly. “Y/N.”
It’s a warning you don’t need. You lean down to steal a kiss, leaving him further winded, nudging his nose with your own, breasts smashed to between you two. Andy gives a silent agreement, dropping a hand down to quickly rub your clit. Your heartbeat is so out of control that you can’t hear anything but your own cries as you cum all over Andy’s cock. He follows with you, holding himself, keeping you there.
He’s shaking when it’s over. You can’t find coherent speech capabilities.
I'll be holding you tight
I'll wait this through
You stay resting on top of him, still keeping him inside. You don’t know what’s going to happen, but you know that there’s no going back now.
This is just another beginning...
~*~
Tagging: @dark-mei-rose @confettucini @lovelylangdonx
Lemme know if y’all wanna be added to the tag list?!!!!
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essaysbyciara · 4 years
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Old Habits Die Hard | Part Seven: Backseat
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SYNOPSIS | PART ONE: DAYS BEFORE | PART TWO: JUST BE GOOD TO ME | PART THREE: RECOGNIZE THE BUTTERFLIES | PART FOUR: DOWN THE STAIRS AND TO YOUR LEFT| PART FIVE: JUST KNOW | PART SIX: JUST & RIGHTEOUS
Warnings: Language, mentions of sexual situations
Peace, loves! We’re back. Thank you to all who hit me up about this story. My laptop died back in July so I’ve been trying to write on a tablet which…yeah. A struggle is a nice way to put it lol😔. Go ahead and catch the vibes and thank you for the reads, likes, comments and follows. Y'all are the realest. 
“I thought you didn’t smoke”
“I don’t. Doesn’t mean I haven’t…”
You take a strong pull of Dave’s blunt in conjunction with heavy breathing caused by his right hand causing a madness in the between. The cracked window of your car brings enough of a cool down so that the both of you won’t pass out from the nighttime haze and the heat travelling from your bodies. Finally, after two weeks, Dave understands your love language; he can’t keep his hands off of you even as you try to take a break from him. He lifts up your left leg with ease, draping your thickness over his right toned, tatted up thigh. The madness is now turning into magic.
“Dave…let me ch-chill. Shit.” He immediately relents, pinching your quivering thigh with that same right hand while grabbing his dutch away from you.. As you sit in puddles of sweat and Dave’s ruins, you stare at the stars above you. It’s the clearest night you’ve seen since you arrived in the city. It just so happens to be your last.
Dave catches your gaze at the night sky through the skylight above you. “You good, shorty?”
“Yeah, I just…” a slight chuckle escapes your lips. “…I can’t believe I’m smoking blunts and fucking in a backseat like high school.”
Dave feels the ping of your words. It’s the first time in the two weeks of your summertime escapade that he’s reminded of how different you two are.
He felt the slight of your words. You and his relationship always reminded Dave that he had some growing up to do. Because of his lack of a place – and the privacy that comes along with it – you two got it in whenever and wherever you could; after his brother went to work in the AM hours, when Aunt Jerri left the house for bingo, in the backseat of your car. Your surroundings would never get in the way of what you two were there for.
Just like Dave wouldn’t let anything stop him from getting at you the day you met. It was an unseasonably cool day for a block party. He and his boys were on the stoop, shooting the shit as always, when Dave saw you walk outside of Aunt’s Jerri’s house carrying trays of food. He knew all the girls from the neighborhood but he never laid eyes on you before. Your cut off shorts toed the line between modest and disrespectful. A white crop top tee and Air Max 90s sandwiched your goodness in the booty shorts you bought with the intention of showing off.
You turned around to see this caramel-covered king, 6’5, tatted from root to tip, body sweating through a white tank top inquiring if you needed any help. You froze like the bucket of ice Aunt Jerri laid down in front of you. He caught you by surprise. You didn’t remember boys from this part of town looking this damn fine. Dave was beyond that. The man you were supposed to be in the Bahamas with didn’t look like him either. Suddenly you were happy he bailed on you.
“Oh. My bad. I didn’t see you there…” You acknowledged Dave’s reach around you to grab a bottle of water from the same ice bucket that mimicked your gaze.
“Yeah, you bad…” Your right eyebrow never arched so high. It wasn’t the only body part that moved. You didn’t know how to respond to Dave’s street-laced flirtation, only to let your tongue peek out the side of your mouth, leaving Dave no choice but to stare at your lips. Dave’s stare and loitering in your presence caught the attention of your Uncle Trace. As Trace schemed Dave down to the basement to grab more lawn chairs, Aunt Jerri gleefully tapped you on the shoulder to remind you that what happens in Philly, stays in Philly. Trace told Dave to not let anything happen.
But as you kept talking, Dave slowly fell into your grooves. Dave didn’t know that you fit in so well because of your summers visiting Aunt Jerri, Uncle Terrence and the rest of the characters that made up your Dad’s side of the family. You acclimated to the energy. Half of your DNA was Reed Street, North Philly; the same as Dave. You two fit especially well in the spare rooms, backseats and basement meetups to you hid from Trace and the rest of the world that thought you had no business together.
But after this last backseat episode, you would be going back to the place that made you so different; to your senior grant writing job, your townhouse and your Roth IRA. Dave was just months into an overnight warehouse job that paid just enough to give him some change to save money to move out of the spare bedroom of Pardi’s already packed rowhouse. He was a work in progress while some would look at Dave as a sign of regression.
But for you, in that moment, nothing – and no one – would or could be better than Dave.
Until he disappeared and you met Yahya.
Right now, you hate Yahya’s guts. It’s been weeks since he told you that he’s taking on Dave’s case on a pro bono basis as a favor to Aunt Jerri. Still seething as you tried on wedding dresses, you kept your cool just enough to keep peace between your mother and her arch nemesis. This time you sided with your mother.
Yahya caught the rest of your static. He caught the silent treatment all weekend, the AM news radio station being the only background noise as you and him drove Aunt Jerri to Union Station. Once her and her hot pink suitcase rolled out of view, you went at Yahya’s neck. You never called Yahya so many words for “inconsiderate”, your Masters in Communication coming in way too clutch. But Yahya passed the bar, so his combative energy matched your loquaciousness. Onlookers got a good look at you two spar as he weaved through Beltway traffic.
To say that you were mad that Yahya took a case this close to the wedding would be a lie. You knew him to have a kind and caring heart, a heart that wouldn’t let injustice slip by. If this was anyone else’s plight, you’d be all for Yahya’s gracious spirit. But it was Dave. Dave who ignored you not once but twice. Dave who, in the very backseat of the car you’re yelling at Yahya in, told you to give him a few weeks and he’d be down to see you. The same Dave who defied all of the rules – and Uncle Trace’s threats– to get at you. Only to leave you. Dave needed to reap that.
But the Dave you knew – despite what others thought – wouldn’t hurt anyone. He was just a hair over eighteen when he caught the gun charge that sent him to prison. A gun he carried because he witnessed his brother die in front of him. He kept it on the straight ever since. Dave was saving up money for his own place, you understood the grind. He was a stone-cold sweetheart covered in a North Philly veneer. He didn’t sow a seed worth anything for this to happen.
Despite the battle on the Capitol Beltway, Yahya and you came home to convene the most obnoxious session of make up sex known to man. Damn the celibacy. Y’all needed to be on good terms and he needed to get Dave out of jail.
“How it’s going, love?” Your dining room is becoming Yahya’s makeshift work office. You couldn’t help to sneak down at night to read some of what Yahya’s been putting together for the case. Seeing Dave’s name all over his papers remind you of how many times Dave’s name escaped from your lips.
“Man, it’s good. We got enough for this bail hearing. I think we can secure a bail low enough that his family and the local justice coalition can afford.”
“Good. Let’s get him home…”
Yahya smiles at your enthusiasm toward Dave’s case. Despite the ninth-circle-of-Hell type of sex you two had in the aftermath of that fight, Yahya knew you steamed from him taking a case just mere months before the wedding. Yet your insistence to know details – like spotting you reading his notes – remind him of why he wants to marry you in the first place. “What date is the hearing?”
“The sixth of next month. You should come up with me. Watch me in action…”
“I can’t. I can’t be in that courtroom. I’d make you nervous.” And make yourself nervous to see Dave.
“You make me nervous regardless, Y/N. But I was thinking you’d want to see your friend get out of jail…”
Your breath stops dead in its tracks.
“My friend? Dave isn’t my friend.”
“That’s not what Jerri told me…”
Although you support Yahya, you still kept you and Dave’s past relationship a secret. Knowing Aunt Jerri, keeping secrets ain’t in her resume. You grip the kitchen counter to brace yourself for Yahya’s inquisition. He passed the bar on his first try; you got some work to do.
“Yeah, about that, I … didn’t think it was relevant.”
“Of course some puppy love shit ain’t relevant. It’s cute, actually.”
Nothing about what Yahya is saying to you makes sense like it does to him. As Aunt Jerri told Yahya about Dave’s case, she slipped in a farce that you and Dave “dated” when you both were kids, Dave buying you water ices and shrimp egg rolls from the “chinese store” whenever you asked. You two allegedly fell out once puberty hit the both of you like a ton of bricks.
So when Yahya peeped Dave staring at you from across the living room of Aunt Jerri’s house, he knew that as the look of a man who now knew he let something good get away. He knew Dave ventured down to the basement not to grab a bottle for Trace but to rspit game at you. Yahya knew you would turn him down, having seen it before. When Dave grabbed your hand , Yahya wasn’t jealous nor hurt: you were set to be his wife. He won. The baddest girl in the world belonged to him.
You start breathing again as Yahya explains Aunt Jerri’s novella of you and Dave’s teenage love affair. In her own twisted, demented yet genius way, Aunt Jerri covered for you. She knew that if she gave Yahya the honest details, he would – as a man –hesitate to help Dave. Apparently you both thought Yahya wasn’t mature enough to handle the truth.
Aunt Jerri’s lie is broken up by the high pitch screeching of your cell phone. You run to answer.
“You have a collect call from PICC. Do you accept the charges? …”
How many times can you stop breathing in one night?
“Hello?”
“Hey, yo… it’s Dave. I hope ain’t hitting you up at a bad time. Ms. Jerri gave me your number…”
“Oh, no … it-it’s cool. I, uh… how are you holding up?”
Dave couldn’t believe that you asked your fiance to help him get out of jail. At least, that’s the narrative that Aunt Jerri sold Dave on as she and Dave’s mother sat in front of him during their biweekly visits. Dave’s face, once pretty-boy and perfect, carried more wear. His jaw slipped when he talked, causing him a pain sometimes much worse than what happened that night in the store.
“This bail hearing is in two weeks.”
“Yeah, Yahya just tol-” You didn’t want to keep bringing up Yahya’s name. Though that man is Dave’s savior, he’s still the one that’s in the way of a final go around with Dave. “…the 6th, yeah.”
“I want you there.”
“You do?” Your aversion toward sitting in the courtroom subsides as Dave’s voice – sexy as ever, even through a prison phone – calls for you to be there for him.
“Yeah. If I get out, I got a chance. Especially with your dude as my lawyer. Thank you for that, for real. That’s why I’m calling, to be real. And I want you to be one of the first people I see when I get out..”
You wonder what story Aunt Jerri told Dave but you can’t take any more of her creativity. “So you comin’…?”
“…you have less than fifteen seconds left on this call…”
“I’ll…”
“…this call has ended. Goodbye…”
“…be there, Dave.”
Taglist: @yoursoulstea​​​​​​ @harleycativy ​​​​​ @twistedcharismaaa ​​​​​ @dorkskinneded ​​​​​​ @need-my-fics​​​​​ @ghostfacekill-monger ​​​​​ @writerbee-ffs ​​​​​ @chaneajoyyy ​​​​​ @amyhennessyhouse
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voltagesmutter · 4 years
Text
Yoosung’s Match
Doing something different-ish, focusing on a series without the smut, lolol. After starting Yoosung’s route, I am so soft for him! I wanted to a series where him and mc share interests, including LoLoL. 
Pairing: Yoosung x OC (Dove)
Summary: When a stranger enters the RFA chat, no-one expected an almost female version of Yoosung to be the participant who would be the key to beginning their parties one more. Will their similarities pull them together or will another come in and sweep her away?
Warnings: None, only reference to game from day 1-11 so spoilers for those not played Yoosung.
Note: This chapter is based off day’s 1 and then day 5 from Yoosungs route. Written in the form like the chatroom. Features clips and conversations from the game but also own created content. Focuses on certain chatrooms rather than every individual one, wish to focus more on developing a storyline with Yoosung than the whole party and gameplay.
Chapter 1: Dove has entered the chatroom.
[Dove has entered the chat]
 Yoosung★: Failed my midterms fml T_T
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707: Cuz u played LOLOL all night lol.
Jumin: If you want to work for our company, you should take care of your GPA.
Yoosung★: I’m still on the list?! +_+
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Jumin: Yes.
707: Nice~ Can’t believe u get to work straight after college lol
707: In this day and age!
Zen: Lame. It’s nepotism.
Jumin: It’s called recruitment actually.
Zen: It’s giving a free pass instead of actually training the worker.
Jumin: Whatever. I couldn’t care less what you say.
Zen: What’s the difference between recruitment and nepotism?
707: Thought they r the same? O_O?
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Jumin: It’s nepotism if you recruit a person you know and they aren’t of any help.
Yoosung★: Oh… So you become a candidate for nepotism the same time you’re recruited!
Zen: 
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707: Wait!!
Yoosung★: Why?
Zen: ??
707: Think someone entered the chat room;;
Jumin: Dove…?
Zen: Wtf. How did it get in here?
707: Hacker!
Yoosung★: Hacker!? Therae’s a hacker in ouer room!!!
Yoosung★: Sevnee do somethign!!
Zen: Hey, typos. -_-;;
707: Wait a sec. I’m searching.
Jumin: Who are you? Reveal yourself. Hey, Assistant Kang.
Jaehee: Yes, I am here.
Zen: You were so quiet I thought you went somewhere.
Jaehee: Nothing was out of the ordinary so I was just watching
Jaehee: but I see something has just happened.
Yoosung★: omg
Jumin: Why is a stranger in our chatroom?
Jaehee: No one can enter this chatroom without installing the private app we use… It seems someone has downloaded the RFA Messenger.
Yoosung★: I thought Seven let only us download it?
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Dove: Hello…
707: I traced the IP…
707: It’s from Rika’s apartment.
Yoosung★: Rika’s apartment?
Jumin: Where was it?
Jaehee: The location is not revealed. I know it to be classified.
707: Anyways, someone must have broken into her apt.
707: It talked now, so it must be a person ^^;
Jumin: Quit shitting around.
Jumin: Dove… Who are you?
Jumin: Reveal yourself, stranger.
Jumin: If you do not reveal yourself, you will pay.
Yoosung★: Yeees! Who are u?!
Zen: Use proper english please.
707: If it doesn’t say anything I’ll hack in and find out.
Zen: …Maybe
Zen: one of my fans?
Dove: Reveal yourselves first. I’m the most confused one here…
Jumin: How fierce.
Zen: Are you a woman?
707: Zen. Be more serious, plz?
707: And wait a sec on the woman thing.
707: Looking it up.
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Yoosung★: Should we… introduce ourselves?
Jumin: Are you serious…?
Jaehee: I think it is a bit too early for that.
Zen: Hi. I’m Zen. (24 yrs old) Musical actor… Don’t look me up on the internet.
Zen: It’s embarrassing.
Yoosung★: Zen, you’re so brave!
Jumin: Guess he wanted to show himself off.
Zen: No way~!
Zen: 
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Yoosung★: Omg… a photo too.
Jaehee: My eyes have been cleansed.
Jaehee:
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Dove: Oh, I haven’t heard of you, sorry…
Dove: Yes to before, I am woman.
Zen: What?!
*Heart break appears on screen*
Jumin: I see that he has zero interest in his privacy.
707: Lolol
707: My nickname’s 707.
707: Real name is a secret.
707: Fyi, Zen’s real name is Hyun Ryu.
Zen: Your name’s a secret but not mine?;
707: U don’t care anyways lol.
Jaehee: 707 does have the strangest name so I understand the secrecy.
707:  The name’s too holy to be spread around~ I’m gonna pray after I finish hacking.
707: Just remember me as the 22yr old young hacker lol
707: Where I live is also a secret.
Zen: So many secrets;;
Yoosung★: I’m Yoosung Kim! I’m a college student… 21 yrs old.
Yoosung★: 
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707: So warm and fuzzy here
Zen: Lol. Seven, you don’t have any selfies to show?
707: Nothing recent.
707: Oh and also!
707: Jumin’s the heir of a pretty famous corporation and Jaehee is his assistant. 27 and 26 yrs old respectively.
707: You have a better sense of who we are now, Dove?
Jumin: Why did you say that…?
707: Doubted you’d do it urself.
Jumin: Stop shitting around.
707: Oh, fyi, Jumin has the cutest cat.
Jumin: Hey.
Jumin: Why are we talking about Elizabeth the 3rd to a stranger?
707: The cat’s name is Elizabeth the 3rd.
707: 
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Yoosung★: That info’s a bit useless…
Yoosung★: We’re not even close with this Dove person yet lol
Jumin: Can’t believe he showed a photo of Elizabeth the 3rd to a stranger…
Jumin: Idiot…
Zen: Stop talking about cats. Giving me goosebumps.
Jaehee: I suggest that we take care of this stranger first.
Jaehee: Could it be that we have a security breach?
Zen: True. Dove, how did you get in here?
Yoosung★: Is it really in Rika’s apartment?
707: Yup. It’s for sure…
707: How did it get the apartment password?!
Zen: Where the hell is the apartment?
Dove: I came here while chatting with a personal called ‘Unknown’. Do you know him by any chance?
Dove: But anyway, I’m Dove. 
Jumin: Unknown?
Zen: Maybe he just didn’t set a username?
707: It’s mandatory to set a username so he must have set it that way.
707: Maybe…
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Yoosung★: How did you end up chatting with that person?
Jaehee: I see.
Jaehee: Where did you download this messenger app?
Jaehee: Dove, you are quite strange as well.
Zen: Do you think this person’s a creep? No way.
Dove: I got it in the app store, I just downloaded it and then was suddenly in a room with unknown and now all of you…
Dove: I just wanted to play games lolol
Yoosung★: You like games too!
Yoosung★: I love games.
Yoosung★: Wait!
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Yoosung★: Did you say lolol as in LoLoL?!
Zen: Dude. A girl won’t play that game;
Zen: Don’t ask stupid questions.
Yoosung★: T_T
Dove: Does the wizard of Tarth ever lie?
Yoosung★:
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Yoosung★: Yoousung.exe has stopped working.
Yoosung★: You play?!
707: Anyways.
707: I should trace the person who distributed the app.
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 [Day 1]
[7:00 am]
Yoosung★ entered the chat
Dove entered the chat
Yoosung★: Do you know that Zen always complains about being single these days?
Yoosung★: But I’ve never even been in a relationship T_T
Dove: Are you not interested in girls?
Yoosung★: …I guess…
Yoosung★: I feel better when I team up with a girl character when playing games.
Yoosung★: And it makes it more interesting if there’s a girl in the guild…
Yoosung★: Was you serious when you said you played?
Dove: Level 69 Mage at your service
Yoosung★: I…
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Yoosung★: I’ve rarely met a girl who plays! 
Yoosung★: Are you in a guild?!
Yoosung★: I’m hoping to be a guildmaster one day.
Dove: Ever heard of ‘Tribe of War’?
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Yoosung★: We are sworn enemies!
Yoosung★:...
Yoosung★: But my special talent is defending the peace! So I guess I can let our guild war slide
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Dove: You bring peace to the world young sir!
Yoosung★: 707 play’s sometimes!
Yoosung★: Maybe we could have an online meet up!
Yoosung★: Since we can’t in real life.
Yoosung★: I wish he would give us the address to Rika’s apartment…
Dove: I’d like that!
Dove: But we have the party to focus on!
Yoosung★: I really like you T_T
Yoosung★: It’s only been a day and I can’t wait to meet you lolol.
Yoosung★: I have class at 9 so I have to go take the bus now.
Yoosung★: The poor fate of a college student…!
Yoosung★: I have to go now. I’m almost running late!
Yoosung★: Dove, let’s talk soon! >_<
Yoosung★ has left the chatroom.
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 [18:02pm]
 Dove entered the chat
Yoosung★ entered the chat
 Dove: Hey Yoosung★.
Yoosung★: Dove, hey^^.
Yoosung★: Today’s the day you joined the organization.
Yoosung★: Usually at this hour, I would have been playing games…
Yoosung★: but I couldn’t really calm myself down.
Yoosung★: Why don’t we talk more about ourselves?
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Dove: Well what would you like to know?
Yoosung★: Well, all Seven told us is that
Yoosung★: you’re a cute girl.
Yoosung★: I want to know… your interests, what you do, and things like that in detail.
Yoosung★: I do want to ask you directly.
Yoosung★: But it does feel a bit too soon for that…
Yoosung★: I would just like to talk to you like this and get to know you gradually.
Dove: I’d like to get to know you better as well.
Yoosung★: A girl who plays lolol and wants to know me
Yoosung★: Are you really real? 
Yoosung★: This isn’t a whole thing of 707 playing a prank is it…?
Dove: Lol I hope not.
Dove: I’m very real, even though I don’t really feel real living in someone else's apartment…
Dove: But I’m excited for the party, I hope I do right by you all.
Yoosung★: I think all the organization members are thinking the same thing.
Yoosung★: If you could do what Rika used to do
Yoosung★: we’d get to host parties again!
Dove: I’ll do my best!
Yoosung★: Do you feel pressured because of everything I’m saying?
Yoosung★: If V donates his photographs, then I’m sure a lot of people will come.
Yoosung★: So you don’t have to worry so much.
Dove: Thank you! 
Yoosung★: Sure!
Yoosung★: Tell me whenever it gets hard!
Yoosung★: I should go play games now!
Yoosung★: There’s a pretty important showdown today.
Yoosung★: Wish me luck so I can win!
Dove: Good luck oh mighty defender of peace!
Yoosung★: Thank u >_<
Yoosung★: Then see ya~!
Yoosung★ has left the chatroom.
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 [22:30] 
Yoosung★ entered the chatroom.
 Dove: Yoosung★ your still up?
Yoosung★: Hey, you here too! 
Yoosung★: I can’t believe I’m talking to the new member~
Yoosung★: I still feel dazed.
Yoosung★: I can’t even focus on gaming today.
Yoosung★: I have so much on my mind because of you…
Dove: All good I hope Lolol.
Yoosung★:
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Yoosung★:  My mind’s going blank now -_-…
Yoosung★: I can’t get thoughts of you out of my head…
Yoosung★: Haha
Yoosung★: Thank you so much for helping.
Yoosung★: Even tomorrow… you could escape Rika’s apartment…
Yoosung★: Delete this app
Yoosung★: and never talk to us again.
Yoosung★: I would really miss you if that happens.
Yoosung★: Please… don’t abandon us.
Dove: I won’t.
Dove: I promise.
Dove: Beside you owe me a meet up on LoLol!
Yoosung★: Yes! Yes. 
Yoosung★: As soon as everything is settled with party.
Yoosung★: I don’t want to feel like I’m pressuring you too much.
Yoosung★: Oh the time! I best be off, I have an early start tomorrow.
Dove: Goodnight~
Yoosung★: Goodnight!
Yoosung★ has left the chatroom.
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[Day 5]
[9:40]
Yoosung★ entered the chat
 Dove: Goodmorning Yoosung!
Yoosung★: Dove, goodmorning^^
Yoosung★: I’m just brushing my teeth!
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Yoosung★: Did you… see the photo Seven posted?
Yoosung★: I really miss it…
Yoosung★: It would have been nice if Rika was in the photo too…!
Yoosung★: Seeing the photo makes me get excited about the next party ^^
Dove: You looked so young and different!
Dove: I like your hair blonde, it suits you better!
Yoosung★: You do?!
Yoosung★: I kinda dyed it because....
Yoosung★: I thought it would help get a girlfriend.
Yoosung★: But since you like, that’s got to be a good sign right?
Yoosung★: I’m curious to know what colour hair you have.
Dove: I mean I would show you if 707 gave me image permission.
Dove: But I guess for now you see me like this Dove: [Website Link]
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Yoosung★: THAT'S YOU?!
Dove: That was me at the LoLoL convention in the fall.
Dove: I cosplayed as my character.
Yoosung★: C-Cosplay!
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Yoosung★: This is all too much.
Yoosung★: A pretty girl who plays LoLoL and cosplays.
Yoosung★: I-
Yoosung★: I have to go! My break is almost over!
Yoosung★: And just when it was all getting good.
Yoosung★: Bye Dove! Yoosung★★ has left the chatroom.
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 [14:36]
707 entered the chat.
 Dove: 707~ Hello!
707: Hello!
707: I was scrolling through the chatrooms and saw you almost kill Yoosung★ earlier.
707: I’m still struggling to believe that that's you.
707: Especially since I’m the only one whos seen the real you.
Dove: Well if I could send photos to you all.
Dove: You can’t laugh but…
Dove: I love sharing photos of my food.
Dove: I really want to send some to Yoosung★, he’s always asking and checking I’m eating.
707: For the sake of the apartment location I can’t allow it.
Dove: Oh come on, Mr.Defender of justice!
Dove: I just want to share some snack photos every now and then.
Dove: There’s a vender outside who sells these buns in the shape of fish, stuffed with chocolate!
707: They are-
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707: My favourite.
707: Beside HoneyBuddha Chips.
Dove: HoneyBuddha Chips…?
707: You’ve never…?
707: I’ll bring you a bag to the party.
707: Only a bag though.
707: But once you start them, you’ll be addicted to them.
707: Like me.
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Dove: I look forward to it!
707: Gahhh.
707: Just got work again….
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707: About the photo’s… I’ll see what I can do.
Dove: Thank you 707~
Dove: You're the best!
707: Lol, tell me something I don’t know.
 707 left the chat.
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[18:25]
 Dove entered the chat.
 Dove: Yoosung, how was the library?
Yoosung★: Dove, you're here!
Yoosung★: I missed you hehe.
Jumin: You two are really warming it up.
Yoosung★: What are you talking about~!
Dove: Did you guys see about Zen?
Jumin: I saw Zen injuries himself.
Yoosung★: Yeah I saw too.
Yoosung★: Don’t worry Dove, Zen is the kinda guy to bounce straight back!
Jumin: I’m sure it’s torture for him to rest right now.
Jumin: Haha…
Yoosung★: Jumin… I feel like you’re enjoying this…;;
Jumin: Being with Elizabeth the 3rd is always enjoyable.
Yoosung★: Oh, you’re with your cat right now;;
Dove: I once went to a cat cafe!
Dove: I feel like you’d enjoy it Jumin.
Jumin: A cat cafe…
Jumin: I’d rather spend time with that narcissist then eat cat.
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Dove: No you silly!
Dove: It’s a cafe where you get to go and eat with cats.
Dove: You can feed them, pet them whilst taking loads of cute photos! It’s really cute.
Dove: Hold up, let me just…
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Dove: Look the one fell asleep atop of my head!
Yoosung★: Wait, you can send us photos now?!
Jumin: I need…
Jumin: To ask assistant Kang about investing into one of these…
Jumin: I fear if I went to one, Miss.Elizabeth would become jealous of smelling other cats upon me.
Jumin: But I like this, very much.
Jumin: If you’ll excuse me, I need to make a phone call about producing one of these for Miss.Elizabeth.
Jumin left the chat.
Yoosung★: You are really cute~
Dove: Aha thank you! 
Dove: I had the best time when I went.
Yoosung★: I can’t believe I get to see the real you.
Yoosung★: Before anyone else as well!
Yoosung★: Well except 707 and Jumin… 
Yoosung★: But before the others and the party as well!
Dove: I asked 707 about it earlier.
Dove: I wanted to be able to send you photos of my food, to prove to you I’m eating.
Yoosung★: You asked him so you could send me photos?
Yoosung★: Thank you. MC.
Yoosung★: For appearing in front of me.
MC: Yoosung, you’re cute.
Yoosung★: Me?!
Yoosung★: Guys tend to not like being called cute…
Yoosung★: but why do I feel so strange hearing it from you?
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Yoosung★: I should go to bed now. I don’t know if I’ll sleep though…
Yoosung★: Are you going to stay up?
MC: Yes.
Yoosung★: Okay.
Yoosung★: Don’t work too hard ^^
Yoosung★: I feel bad if you’re tired.
Yoosung★: Then I’ll get going!
Yoosung★ has left the chatroom
23 notes · View notes
beelspillowpet · 3 years
Text
Security (A SFW Jinx + Beel & Lucifer)
The idea I had the previous night. Jinx and Beelzebub had been talking about having a physical marking for their pact. Something like a permanent tattoo to show that they were together. Jinx had a bit of an episode, and as a result, they go to Lucifer to calm her down.
This is SELF! INDULGENT! TRASH! I feel like I need to say that every time now lol. It’s about Jinx, so of course there is not “MC” talk. The personalities might be a bit warped, but that’s because this takes place in MY PERSONAL CANON of how the story went down. MC is not a sack of potatoes blindly rushing into danger. MC is a troubled young woman named Jinx.
Warnings? A hint of sadness | If you squint, a bit of eating disorder | DDLG elements- although nothing explicit.
“I’m sorry! I told you it might-?!”
Jinx crawled off the edge of the bed and rushed to grab her robe. Out of courtesy for everyone else and a sense of decency, she threw on something before she could rush out of the door and to the bathroom.When Beelzebub managed to get into clothes of his own, he followed after her.
When he found her, she was doubled over the toilet, emptying the contents of tonight’s dinner in chunks. What a shame. He’d just got her to stop throwing up her dinner not too long ago. “Pum’kin?” Beelzebub frowns. He reaches out to touch her, but she backs away from him instantly, squeezing herself down and against the corner of the bathroom.
“Don’t! J-just don’t, please!”
He pulls away, his stomach churning. He’s heard her sound like this before, but it’s been ages. He still didn’t know exactly what he did wrong. He was only doing what she asked.
For safe measures, he presses himself back against the wall opposite of her. “Okay… I’m sorry. I didn’t think I’d scare you like that. I was just trying to mark you like you asked. You do still want me to mark you, right?” It was an innocent question. They’d been talking about leaving a physical mark on her skin ever since they made their pact together. Jinx thought she was ready, she’d been ready for a while, hadn’t she?
“I do! I did! I did say that, didn’t I? But I didn’t think you’d put it there, Bee!” Jinx shouted. “I thought you’d put it on my chest, or my arm or something!”
“What’s wrong with putting it on your belly?”
Another innocent question. The answer should have been simple. I’m just uncomfortable with it being there, was all she needed to say. Her mouth opened, then shut. Then opened again as if she was convincing herself to actually explain why. What came out instead was a quiet plea.
“I need to see papa. Can you take me to him?”
Beelzebub walked her down the long corridor. He got her into a quick shower and then a pair of pajamas back in her bedroom first. He held her hand, and she held onto her spare blanket and rabbit plushie. Beelzebub knocked once, then twice on the door when Lucifer didn’t answer. Shortly after, he heard tired groans and the sound of the man rolling out of bed and to the door.
When he opened it, he looked as tired and frustrated as he usually did. He must have pushed back his hair to present himself somewhat normally before even letting anyone get the chance to see his bedhead. Just like him to do so.
“Beel and Jinx.” He says slowly, fighting the urge to yawn. “I suppose it’s better than Mammon. What are you two doing up this late?” He peers over Beelzebub’s form so he can properly see Jinx’s face. The moment he can, he’s wide awake. Tears were rolling down her cheeks, and her lips were curled downward into a deep frown. “What’s going on?” he asks more softly.
“Well- we were…” Beelzebub immediately trails off. He didn’t want to give away her privacy so easily, so he thought for a moment while Lucifer coaxed Jinx into his arms for a hug. “I scared her. I didn’t do it on purpose, but she ended up throwing up in the bathroom. She wanted to come see you.”
Lucifer looked over Beelzebub’s face with a scowl. He pulled Jinx back for a second to wipe her tears away. “There, there. It’s okay Little One. Come on, I’ll put you to bed. You must be exhausted.” He turned around and walked Jinx into his bedroom, taking her over to the corner of his bed. He looked back at Beelzebub and grimaced. He was to wait there so he could get full disclosure on what exactly happened.
Jinx wrapped the blankets around herself before sitting down on the bed, hugging her rabbit doll close. “P-papa, I’m sorry for waking you up.” She apologized promptly. “I know you got a busy day t-tomorrow and I shouldn’t be freaking out over it. It’s dumb, I’m being dumb.”
“It’s alright.” Lucifer sighs. “You’re scared and hurt, Little One. I’m going to take care of it, okay? Now, I need you to be brave for me. I’m going to have a quick chat with Beel about what happened, and then we can talk too. But I need you to sit here and breathe like I taught you; can you do that?”
Jinx shook her head, feeling tears forming again. “I don’t wanna be alone again, papa. Please?”
“Little One,” Lucifer starts again, giving her another hug. “I would tear anyone apart in a slow and agonizing fashion if they ever hurt you. No one, not even Father, could stop me from making sure you’re safe. I protect my own.” Jinx buried her face into his clothed chest and sniffled.
Lucifer chewed his tongue, pushing further. “When I pulled you and your brother away from those demons trying to hurt you I told you how much I loved you both and wanted to make sure you survived. Do you think what I told you two in that moment was a lie?”
It took Jinx a second to process. Then she shook her head.
“Give me just a minute, Little One.” He let go of her and stepped out of his bedroom with swiftness. The timer in his head is already ticking. He allows Beelzebub to fill him in vaguely about what happened before crossing his arms and looking away.
“That’s a bit…” Lucifer sighs. “It can’t be helped, I suppose. When she gets like this, I’m the only one who can calm her down. I suspect she’ll want to spend the night in here.”
Beelzebub frowns. “She won’t want to leave…? I didn’t get an answer out of her before about why she reacted like that. I was only doing what she wanted…”
Lucifer yawned again, almost at his limit. “I know you were, Beel. Sometimes humans go through terrible things that leave them a bit… scarred. She is no exception. Just go on to bed, things will be handled on my end from here.” He waved Beelzebub off and reentered his bedroom.
“I’m back, Little One.” Lucifer announced. Jinx hopped off the bed and dove back into his arms, holding him tight. “I told you, I would be back. Thank you for being so brave for me. Now, I need to ask you a few questions, okay?”
Jinx looked up at him, pouting.
“Don’t fret, I won’t pry about it. I just need to know what to do moving forward. I got Beel’s side of things, but what about you? Do you want to talk about it?” Jinx shook her head, burying her face back into his chest. “Okay. What about tomorrow? I can tell things are going to be bad if we don’t clear the air. Or I can take you to visit Dr. Wayne?”
“Dr. Wayne?” Jinx asks, looking back up at him. “I haven’t seen him since before Christmas… I need to give him my notebook! I did some writing in it, we can go over that stuff!”
Lucifer smiles, pushing her hair out of her face. “Okay, Little One. We can take you to see Dr. Wayne after we make a phone call in the morning, alright? Now… Do you want to go back to your room? Are you feeling good enough to stay in your room now?”
Jinx frowned again, letting go of Lucifer. She sat down on the bed again and hugged her stuffed rabbit. “Can I stay here?” she asked softly. “I know it’s silly. I’m too old to act like this, but I-”
“You’re not too old for any of this. You are my precious Little One. You need my protection and my security, and I am happy to provide it. You could be 21, or 51 years old, and I would never turn you away. Problems like yours just don’t go away, whatever they may be. Know that whenever things get too tough, you have me to fall back on.”
Jinx tilted her head downwards and smiled a little. “You always know what to say, papa.” She threw her legs on to the bed and pulled the sheets over her. She took her extra blanket and placed it on top for the extra warmth, as it was usually colder in his room. Lucifer walked over and kissed the top of her forehead. He tickled her in, making sure the blankets fit over the majority of her body before taking his place on the other side of the bed.
“G’night, papa.” Jinx whispered. “N’ thank you.”
Lucifer yawned one last time, shutting his eyes. “Good night, princess.”
7 notes · View notes
foxymoxynoona · 3 years
Note
FYI. I’m about to unload a whole story to you lol. But for some reason, I have had an urge to tell you why AMENDED is my absolute favorite story and why I relate to it.
Starting with Isabella. Me and her grew up very similar. My mother was a drug addict and alcoholic most of my life. After her and my father (who was also an addict) separated. Then came the same creepy boyfriends. But unlike Isabella, I had an older sister so that helped out a lot. My childhood wasn’t as bad as I remember because I spent most of it with my grandparents, who I fortunately still have to this day! I LOVE being with my grandparents! But it always sucked going home because of the constant fights with my mom and the uncomfortableness with her boyfriends. Of course, like Isabella’s mom. They were her top priority. Only one time did one try to touch me. I was 13-14? I’m not sure but I was in 8th grade. I told my mom right away and the only response I got was “Did he think it was me?” I still haven’t forgiven her for that. She made him apologize and he continued living in my house (Oh how much I wish I had a JK as a best friend during those times)
I moved out when I was 16 to live with my grandparents because we lost our house. My mom, sister, niece and nephew went to go live with my mothers parents (I am not close to those grandparents) And I went to go live with my favorite grandparents (My dad hasn’t been a constant part of my life for a while now) Everything was going great! I was going to school regularly and I also got my first job at the mall! Which is where I ended up meeting my first serious boyfriend.
Put it in short words, I had found my own Landon! He was sweet, charming, older. He worked in the food court restaurant, just a few stores away from my job! I was 17 and already dropped out of school and was working full time when we started officially dating. He was 20. Everything was going great but it was all moving so fast! About 3 months into our relationship he got an apartment and I moved in with him. The first few months were amazing. We had privacy, and a lot more time to spend together. What 17 year old didn’t love the idea of having their own apartment and living with their boyfriend?! I guess the age difference made it more easier to excuse his now ‘protective’ behavior.
By the time I was 18, I had met sooo many people, especially at work. I had more adult friends and occasionally they would ask me out to hang out with them and have girls night! He did not like that. He was so worried that while i was out with my friends he would call me every 30 minutes to make sure I was okay and to also ask what i was doing. Despite him going out almost every night with his brothers and friends to bars. Eventually It got to the point he never wanted me to go out at all and if i did, I wasn’t allowed back home. I was young so I stupidly let him have that control over me.
3 years later. We are still together. I turned 21 and couldn’t even go celebrate because I was pregnant. But I was happy. During those 3 years he had only become more and more mentally abusive. He was manipulative, insecure, possessive. And it took me to be pregnant with his child to finally acknowledge that. But i stayed because? I was pregnant. I didn’t want my child growing up without a father and I also didn’t want her to have parents that fought all the time because they hated each other.
Skip to after giving birth. I quickly learned he was not interested in playing the dad role. He would work and come home and play video games all night. We didn’t have anyone to watch the baby so i couldn’t work. He was not happy about that at all. After constant fights and learning he was spending his money on drugs and alcohol (despite always complaining about being broke because he had to support us), I realized I wasn’t in love anymore and told him I wanted to leave. It wasn’t a safe environment for my child and I had to grow up and realize it’s not just about me anymore but about my child. That night was the first and last time he every got physical with me. And I can proudly say that was the night I packed my bags, left and never looked back.
All that happened almost 2 years ago. I am now 23 and have a 2 year old. Things are different now and I feel like its in sync with amended’s current story line. All though I don’t have my Jk yet. I am dealing with the difficulties of letting my daughter have father time. The only reason he is in our lives is because I don’t want my child to hate me for keeping her away from him. I do get along with him, but only for my daughters sake. And because he knows this, he uses it to his advantage. Knows how to push my button and get inside my mind, especially with letting him come see her or letting her go visit him. He even has the crazy girlfriend who doesn’t like me! Lmao. I don’t let my child be alone with him though because I don’t trust him enough to watch over my child. He still wants to live that carefree life and loves being able to hand me back my child when it gets too much for him.
But that’s okay with me, because I will gladly take my child back. Right now, I’m getting my life back together slowly. But after reading your story, it has helped me realize my life isn’t over yet. I can still do things! When I am ready to meet someone, I definitely want to find someone like amended JK. Not the marriage and arrangement part lol but a man who wants to take care of me and my child and supports me and will have my back no matter what. Someone who can help me say no even when I feel like i can’t. To protect me from my Ex the way JK protects Isabella from Landon. I relate to this story so much, and I think you write it beautifully. I just wanted to say thank you for the words you write and for giving me an escape, especially when things have gotten a little too rough. It always so nice to relax and read one of your stores (:
I don’t mind if you answer this publicly or privately. I’m also sorry for the whole life story lol but I just couldn’t stop typing! I just wanted you to know how much your stories mean to me (:
Since you said I could, I’m going to answer this publicly. Because one thing I do see in reader response is often this big divide (not ALWAYS but often) between readers who have or have not been in abusive relationships, and readers who are or are not parents. And I think it’s actually really important and healthy and it was a reason I decided to post this story, because these are things that so completely change your mindset and outlook on life, but they can be really difficult to understand if you just don’t have that experience. I wanted to use Amended as an opportunity to make people stop and think and understand situations they (hopefully!) are not in themselves, or if they ARE in, have the opportunity to seeing someone grow through it and find love and security and happiness on the other side.
There are lots of my own experiences, doubts, struggles, and pains wrapped up in Isabella’s story too, though not necessarily 1:1. Sometimes they were situations or relationships I didn’t have much of a choice in (like with a bad dad), but other times they were things I could have and should have left earlier and I didn’t (like an abusive ex that I didn’t live with, didn’t have children with, separating should have been easy.) What I’ve taken away from it is that we are strong and adaptable and we go through life making the best we can and adapting to situations, and that can bite us in the ass sometimes when we adapt to situations that we should be adapting away from. But it can be so hard to do that! I think people forget too that love isn’t always logical but it can be a hell of a jail when you love someone who is hurting you. “Giving up” on someone to save yourself is really, really hard. Like couldn’t someone make the case that JK should haven’t to deal with Isabella being mean to him and should just leave? Where do you draw the line? It’s so hard!
I just want to say HUGE kudos to you. Your daughter is so lucky to have a mom who has not only done such incredible and difficult things at a young age, but that fact that you also make things harder for yourself (in having to still deal with your ex) to try and make things the best for her. Especially when you had a difficult home life... probably my love for Isabella shows already how much I love and admire you and your situation and all the women who have been in similar situations. You clearly had to grow up so so young and that sucks, that’s so unfair for you. I wish I could give you back more of the childhood and adolescent that were stolen from you.
You are helping me remember too why I like to write about moms. There is not as much media as  there should be about moms where they are still the star of the story. When I had my son I realized with shock that to a lot of the world, my life is over as an individual now. That’s bullshit! The start of my son’s life story doesn’t mean the end of mine! It doesn’t mean I just become a side character in his story! It just means there’s a new sub-plot in the story of ME, and I can continue to reinvent and discover myself over and over for the rest of my life. We have to break free of this idea that mothers are nothing but mothers, and this idea that 30 or 40 or 50 are too late. Because the reality is sure, once you become a mom, sometimes the me stuff is on hold for a while in order to survive, and sometimes you’re mostly wrapped up in the mother role, and that’s totally fine. But it’s definitely not over. It’s never two late to get to “start” your story, or “restart” your story. I’ve found that often when I’m in the middle of things being hard it feels like the chance will never come, but it will, and it won’t be too late! It sounds like you are kicking ass for yourself and your daughter right now, and how incredible that she’ll grow up seeing that strength and resilience.
So thank you so so much for sharing your story. I always love hearing from you.  🥰
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yourcoffindoor · 4 years
Text
A Spike in My Heart: Part 2
Pairing: Vampire!Gerard Way x Reader
Prompt: Request from Anons- “ Hey sweetie I love your work so much ❤️ Can you please write pt 2 of vampire Gerard? Something where reader wakes up, angst and fluff? “  and “ VAMPIRE GERARD PART 2 WOULD BE SO NEAT AAAAAA “ (lol <3)
AN: As always, hope my story does the job. Enjoy!
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Everything was black. Voices washed over you like gentle waves in a calm ocean, and among them was a familiar male voice that you couldn't yet identify, but somehow understood he was speaking to you. 
Don't leave me, it said. Don't leave me, over and over, and you cut through the darkness looking for the source of the voice so you could tell him you never would. You're right here, why can't he find you and take you where there's light?
You weren't sure now if you were asleep or dead, dreaming or in purgatory. At times you could feel icy hands on your forehead or resting for a moment on your cheek. You seemed to drift in and out of consciousness, sometimes hearing those around you, before falling back into nothingness.
If this was sleep, you often dreamed of Gerard. The setting was always the same-- You were attending some sort of formal function, both of you dressed to the nines. You always were taken aback by how handsome he was in his suit, and you told him so, certain he would blush if it were possible for a vampire to do so.
He would pull out a slim box and offer it to you. 
"A present." he informed you shyly. Inside was a stunning garnet necklace far more extravagant than anything you had ever owned before. The crimson gems were cut in a teardrop shape and gleamed as they caught the light from seemingly every angle.
He offered to put it on for you, and you eagerly agreed. His hands moved slow as they brushed the hair from the back of your neck as if savoring the sensation. It took a moment to secure the clasp, and you thanked him when he had accomplished his mission before asking how it looked on you.
The dream always ended the same. Gerard stepped in front to get a look at you, and his expression quickly changed from admiration to horror, tears welling in his hazel eyes.
"What is it?"
"I'm so sorry!" he would say repeatedly. "Y/N, please, I'm so sorry!"
Confused, you looked down and saw a trickle of familiar deep red run down your chest. You turned to find a mirror and screamed as you saw your reflection. They necklace was gone, replaced by a ring of bite marks and steady streams of blood.
It was from this dream that you finally jolted awake, finding yourself tucked neatly in your bed. You looked around to find no one, but noticed a chair had been brought to the side of the bed, a sign that someone had been caring for you.
 You heard movement just outside your bedroom door and listened as a muffled argument carried on. 
"You should have never starved yourself to that point." an unknown male voice hissed. "It's fucking dangerous, Gerard."
"I realize that," he lamented bitterly, and you longed to reach for him and to tell him it was ok.
"You need to come to terms with what you are. It's not going to change." 
Gerard's voice was low, defeated. "And how do you suggest I do that Frank? I feel like a parasite."
"Y/N doesn't think so."
"And look what I did to her!" His voice rose, filled with anger instead of self pity. "Look what happens to people I love when I'm honest about what I am!"
Frank was silent for a moment. "You love her? Have you told her?"
"No," Gerard replied, voice grim, "and now I might not get the chance."
You felt a warm flush bloom on your pallid cheeks upon hearing Gerard confess his feelings. You noticed that there was a glass of water left on your bedside table by your caretaker, and you reached for it in hopes of calming yourself down. Instead your shaky hand sent the glass tumbling to the floor, silencing the discussion outside your door with a loud splash and shatter.
The bedroom door opened immediately and Gerard rushed in, planting himself by your side. He reached  his hand towards you instinctively, but quickly drew it back, as though he was afraid he would do more harm than good.
"Y/N," his eyes were filled with relief, "I'm...I'm so glad you're awake."
You instead reached towards him, clasping his hand in yours. "Thanks for looking after me. How long has it been?"
"Almost two days," came a voice from the doorway. You looked over to find a man leaning against the door frame, arms folded. "See, I told you Y/N would be fine." He gloated to Gerard before turning his attention back to you.  "I could hear your heartbeat from the front door. Kept telling Gee you weren't a goner."
Gerard looked mortified, much to your amusement.
"Thanks for your input, uh... sorry who are you?"
"Name's Frank. Gerard's band-mate, fellow bloodsucker. Hope you don't mind my being here. Gerard called me over for help."
You smiled softly. "Not at all." 
Gerard cleared his throat, glaring at Frank who stood smirking in the doorway.
"Guess I should give you guys some privacy," he said, turning to leave, but quickly stopped in his tracks. "Oh yeah, are you gonna tell her what you told me?"
"Jesus Frank, she just woke up!"
Frank shrugged. "You're right. Give her a good five minutes to breathe before you tell her you're in love with her."
"Frank!"
Frank laughed to himself, closing the door behind him.
It was quiet for a moment, but the silence was heavy with words that were aching to be said. Gerard fidgeted with his fingers, trying to prevent them from reaching for you again. 
After a moment, he suddenly stood up. "I should get you a new glass of water, you must be thirsty."
"That can wait," you insisted, grabbing the edge of his shirt before he could disappear, "Stay with me."
Slowly he returned to his watch post beside the bed. You decided to break the ice.
"I'm not mad. I'm not scared. And I'm feeling better by the second. You don't need to be worried."
"Easier said than done I'm afraid," he forced a soft laugh, his crooked smile expressing more sadness than he intended.
"Were you sitting there this whole time?"
"How could I be anywhere else? I had to make sure you were going to be ok. You seemed to be having some intense dreams, you were tossing and turning."
You decided against burdening him with the details of your nightmare. "Doesn't matter now that I'm awake. Besides, I don't even remember what they were about."
Gerard tucked a strand of unkempt black hair behind his ear. "Well, anyway, at one point I felt your forehead and it seemed warm--well warmer than usual to me--and I was worried you were getting a fever, so I called Frank over here for help. He's good in situations like these. I mean, not that I've been in this situation before...I was so worried, Y/N. But he kept telling me you were fine, that I definitely did overdo it but you also probably just had a bad reaction--"
You cut off Gerard’s awkward rambling with a tight embrace, catching him off guard. His body was tense, but soon melted into your touch.
"Thank you," you murmured, your head on his shoulder.
"I don't know if thanks are necessary...since I caused the problem." he mused softly. "Y/N, you don't deserve to be dragged into a life like this."
"Gerard, is it true? What Frank said?"
His eyes widened. "Huh?"
"He said you're in love with me. In fact, I may have heard you say it myself just outside the door there."
Gerard nervously tousled his hair with one hand, as if he were hoping to find the right answer within it.
"Its true. I know its a lot to process and...we only just went over the whole vampire thing...you don't need to feel obligated or anything. But Y/N, I've never felt they way I feel about you before. Not for anyone or anything. I thought I couldn't have normal things like a relationship...but being with you makes me feel like there's a chance for happiness."
He had looked away in the course of stumbling through his off-the-cuff confession, gazing instead at the floor. His nervous, awkward affection only served to endear him to you further.
"Then listen. I told you before, I don't care what you are. I love you. I know you didn't mean to hurt me. I want you to know that I'm in this with you now. And if you let me in, we can figure it all out. Together."
He turned to look at you, eyes warm with affection. "I'll never let it get out of hand again. I promise. There'll be no repeat of this."
"There is one part I'd like a repeat of."
"Oh?"
You hoisted yourself up on the bed and leaned in towards Gerard, gently planting your lips on his, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. You lingered there for a moment, savoring the kiss and the rush of endorphins that came with it.
"Feel free to let that get out of hand as often as possible."
Gerard grinned, and lay down next to you in the bed. You spent the next moments holding each other in silence, knowing that you had eternity to figure out whatever came next.
taglist: @honimello​
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Text
It’s all fun and games until you’re lying in bed and suddenly have a flash of what it FELT like to be depressed. I remember when all I could manage to do was lie in bed and daydream about all the things I wanted to accomplish but didn't have the energy to do any of it. I had mostly healed from it, but I think caffeine is a trigger and heavy emotions dont help either.
I am being triggered by my mother’s long forwards on the pandemic because she doesn't often care to fact check and is becoming the exact creature I fight outside the house. It feels like a personal defeat each time she does it because if my own family falls prey to fake news, then what hope do I have with other people? My politics unfortunately doesn’t let me be two-faced about this and I behave reactively in a way that I’m not proud of and only know how to help when I apply my head to it. Conflict resolution or healthy conflict resolution is not something I have any examples of at home, so taught myself it yet dont implement it at home. Maybe as punishment? To point out exactly how they make me feel when they attack me and send my whole body into panic? This morning my mother saw a bottle of coke in the fridge and yelled at me. She said she would throw it out if another bottle came home. I’m done cutting her slack and masking this as a mode of caring. Yes, I have thyroid and she reacted from a space of panic. But at 53, she’s an adult who should have learned how to regulate her emotions instead of taking her raw panic out on me even if it was induced by care and fear. I’m no one’s punching bag just because they’re having a chemical reaction in their own brain because then I dont see it as a form of care, but of aggression. It’s also a shit message to send out to your child? That someone operating from a space of care is ALLOWED to be verbally violent and threaten to take away something that’s brought you joy?
I was disgusted in that moment, but my nervous system was thrown into deregulation for the whole morning. It fucks with the work I have to do, and takes away from my ability to calmly focus on something. Most importantly, this behaviour brings out rebellion in me where I start to OD on the behaviour that brought out that reaction as a challenge against her. It’s self harm, but it comes from a space of raw anger that I’m still learning how to channel.
To be honest, I’m angry about a lot of things.
I’m angry that I’m being controlled and have no way out except for the way they decide is the way out. The problem with being furious with but also caring about the people who hurt you is that you learn to turn your anger and rage inward and when they react to you with rage and you react to yourself with rage, it’s easy to place yourself in the position of doormat. I let myself be taken for granted because they forced me to. If I’m being hateful, it’s only because I’m done being asked to hate myself for not following the path they think is best.
No, I shouldn't have to work extra hard to prove to my parents that I deserve freedom or a good education. They have crippled me, so now I have to do the work of picking myself up and walking. But this is so unfair, because I have next to no support while most people learning to walk in their early adult years had family rooting for them and a peer group learning to walk at the same time.
My journey is solitary because by virtue of being either uneducated (not his fault at all and I hate my grandfather for this) or disinterested in education (her fault because my maternal grandfather was completely supportive of her studying further) my parents think I’m supposed to fit into the mould of a traditional woman and push me to do things they think I’m not doing because THEY are afraid. My failure is the result of fear that wasn't even my own but was forced on me to carry along with the burden of shame.
I will not apologise for yelling at her today, no. She was thoughtless, and then turned my specific problem into a statement of me always having issues with her, which is untrue. I dont need to engage with her gaslighting or emotional blackmail any longer.
I’m literally getting married to escape being controlled and it’s sad how she knows this but still won't apologise to me because her ego gets in the way. My father might be the reason she’s doing all this, but I specially feel rage towards her because she’s the one enacting things that he left unsaid. She’s got agency of her own, but she chooses to squander it where required, but use it in full force to hurt me and my dreams of where I want to be and who I want to become. My life unfortunately has been confined within their ideas of what structures should resemble and I s2g I will not come back to live with them on their terms if I can help it.
But this is so bitter a realisation that I cant help but cry. Gautam doesn't love me and yet I feel the gutting loss of what could have been had my family been... not this way. We could have had a real future. We still can, but he doesn't love me, and this shouldn't hurt like this but it does?
Am I too old for heartbreak? I am, am I not?
He must think I’m absolutely obsessive and codependent, but I’m really just a person dealing with emotional abuse that’s lasted all my life (along with some good old physical beating with belts, hands, cutlery, brushes, whips, lol I’ve had a mirror broken on my leg a day before we were supposed to leave for a holiday when I was 10) and all I really want is to be able to look at him and securely call him mine because I’ve been carved out from the inside by complete lack of emotional support. I look at him and recognise someone who’s a little like me with a history of different kinds of abuse and each time he rejects me, I feel like I deserve to reject myself. Which is a very problematic approach to self love. I cant expect someone like me to love me because I’m lazy to do the work. Actually, I’m not lazy. I just feel so defeated that I keep lying down dreaming of the future and hoping he will love me enough for me to fill my insides with it and that will resurrect me. And each time I get knocked down I take it as my cue that things for me are destined to be hard and self loathing is the only relationship I can have with myself. But it’s not. I shouldn't be. This body has seen a literal whole lifetime of violence because it was brought into this world through violence. I wasn't wanted. So when I was born I was 97% dead and stories of how my own blood relatives are trash were told to me when I was very young and I didn't need to be told stories of such violence at 4 and 5.
I didn't need to be told that my grandmother wanted to burn my mother alive or that my mother didn't care enough about me and had run away when she’d left the house for a bit. She was tortured by them, so she took it out on me even if she claimed to love me. I know this because she still does it every time my father screams at her. I cant keep rationalising these things and understanding. I only have this empathy because I was used as her crutch for as long as I can remember. I cant do this anymore because despite emotionally depleting me she’s also violated my space and privacy multiple times and used violence against me to score brownie points with my father. 
I’m just disgusted with her and women like her who show women down for approval from men. She bit me because she couldn't bite her oppressor, even though I was literally just a child. And now I bite myself when I cant bite my oppressors and really need to unlearn it.
G made the right decision by not picking me. I’m a literal mess and his family is most definitely more stable than mine. He will never be able to hold me and witness me without pity/horror. Is it too much to want a stable life at home?
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star-spangled-steve · 5 years
Text
His New Partner
Chapter 8: The Sleeping Arrangements
Series Masterlist
Previous Chapter
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader
Words: 1255
Warnings: Pure fluff, mentions of sex, bed-sharing.
A/N: I hope that you guys are enjoying this series, even if it is just a bunch of fluff. This chapter is one of the last before smut gets involved, so wish me luck there, lol! And I once again apologize for the delay, but I’ve been on a family vacation so time to myself is very limited!
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“You two still haven’t had sex?” Clint exclaimed in disbelief, almost louder than the sound of the rain pouring just outside.
“What?” Tony spit out his drink.
“Natasha!” Y/N rebuked.
“You told Natasha?” Steve accused.
“I’m sorry!” The redhead spoke. “It just slipped out.”
“Seriously, N/N?” Steve asked.
“I’m sorry, it’s just…”
“We tell each other almost everything.” Natasha finished for her. “And it didn’t mean that you had to shout it out, Clint!” She smacked him on the head.
“I’m sorry, it’s just a bit unbelievable.” The archer said.
“Why?” Y/N asked from her spot beside Steve on the couch. The compound was having a movie night, and now that ’The Breakfast Club’ was over, the group was spending some time to chat together.
“Well,” Tony explained, “you guys have been a couple for… What? Almost a year now, I think. Most people do it within the first month or two.”
“Tony even does it on the first date.” Natasha smirked.
“We aren’t ‘most people’.” Steve stated.
Clint was still confused. “Have you two even done… ’stuff’?”
“What does ‘stuff’ mean?” Steve questioned.
“You know…” Tony added, “hand stuff, mouth stuff?”
“Tony!” Steve and Natasha chastised.
Y/N tucked her head into Steve’s chest at the invasive question.
“Sorry.” The billionaire mumbled. “Barton was the one who asked.”
“None of that is any of your business.” Steve stated, not particularly happy that his friends were discussing his and his girlfriend’s sex life.
“But no, they haven’t.” Natasha whispered and was instantly hit with two hard glares.
“Come on,” Steve said as he grabbed Y/N’s hand and stood them up. “I’ll take you home.”
The sounds of Tony and Clint laughing were instantly cut off by a huge clap of thunder, causing the group to turn their heads towards the large windows.
“Looks like you might not be going anywhere after all.” Tony spoke as he looked at the weather report on his phone. “The streets are close to being flooded.”
“Oh.” Y/N worried. “What am I going to do?”
“You can stay on my floor.” Steve told her.
“Ooooo.” Clint wiggled his eyebrows.
“Shut up, I’ll take my couch.” Steve reprimanded.
Y/N nodded her head. “Thank you.”
“Of course.” Steve smiled, putting his hand on her back and leading her towards the elevators.
“Have fun not having sex!” Tony shouted, earning a glare over the shoulder from the Captain.
Steve lead Y/N into the elevator and up to his place. She had been there multiple times before, if the couple ever wanted privacy. But never had she been on his bed, let alone actually slept in it.
“Here.” Steve handed her what looked like a white t-shirt and grey sweatpants. “They might be a bit big, but that’s all I got. Actually, I can go see if Natash-“
“This is perfect, Steve.” Y/N smiled before leaning up to place a chaste kiss on his lips.
He smiled. “You can go change in the washroom.”
“Alrighty.” She replied and went to follow his instructions. Y/N had never worn Steve’s clothing, besides his leather jacket that often got draped over her shoulders on a chilly night. The thought of being doused in a smell, so uniquely Steve, made her giddy inside. 
She slipped the clothes on and took a look in his bathroom mirror. Both the shirt and pants were a bit long, and there was almost enough room to fit two of her inside. But it was all Steve’s, and Y/N felt honoured just to be wearing it.
She stepped out of the washroom and Steve’s head immediately whipped up to see her.
“Wow, you look just adorable.” He grinned. Steve himself had gotten changed into black t-shirt and plaid pyjama pants. He had a pillow in his hands as he was setting up the living area for his night’s sleep.
“What is this?” Y/N questioned, gesturing to the little makeshift bed he was creating on his couch.
“My bed.” Steve responded like it was obvious.
“I didn’t know that you were serious about taking the couch.” Y/N said.
Steve shook his head. “My mother would cry if she found out I made a lady take the couch.”
Y/N chuckled. “No, silly, I was meaning that we could just both take the bed.”
“Oh.”
She began to worry. “Unless that would make you uncomfortable, or…?”
“No!” Steve blurted. “No, it wouldn’t make me uncomfortable. Actually, it would be quite nice. I just didn’t want to make you feel pressured or anything.”
Y/N giggled. “Nothing has to happen, Stevie.”
He blushed. “Right, I know.”
She leaned up to give him a soft kiss, and he was more than happy to return the favour.
“Let’s just go to bed.” Y/N whispered against Steve’s lips, the sentence sounding so foreign to them.
He nodded before gesturing her into his bedroom and then following behind.
“Do you have a specific side?” She asked.
“Whatever side you’re not using.” Steve answered, watching how cute Y/N looked getting into his bed. He smiled to himself before shutting off the lamp. The only remaining source of light became the moon through the blinds.
After Steve climbed in bed, the pair turned to face each other and began to admire each others features. It started out with the most prominent ones. Steve cast his view upon her big E/C eyes, the little pieces of H/C hair that began to fall upon her gorgeous face. He then looked deeper, and took notice of more subtle details. Details such as the bridge of her nose, the gentle curve of her lips, all of the tiny freckles and acne scars that dusted her skin. Y/N found some of her features ugly or bothersome, just like most people did. But to Steve, they were the most beautiful parts about her. What made her unique.
Y/N spent this intimate moment gazing upon not only Steve’s looks, but also his mannerisms. How sometimes his right eye blinks slightly faster than his left, something Y/N found so precious. The way he seemed just a little tense, like he was always prepared for danger. She hoped that one day he could finally rest. Stop protecting the world, and focus on protecting himself… possibly a little family as well. She hoped that she could witness that first hand.
All of these details, so personal, are things extremely difficult to notice during the day. Fast cars, busy streets, demanding jobs, and exhausting people can get in the way. But during the night, it was oh so quiet. The only thing occupying their attention was the other.
“I love you.” Steve stated, breaking the comfortable silence. Three words that were often said in a hurry; between kisses, before missions, and during goodbyes were now spoken so slowly that Y/N could almost feel them travel their way into her heart.
“I love you more.” She replied with a big smile.
“Hmm…” Steve pretended to ponder, “not possible.”
He then pressed a slow kiss on her lips, their tongues dancing. Between the moon shining through the windows and the movement of their mouths, the moment looked exquisite enough to hang in a museum.
They broke the kiss with heavy breaths before Y/N turned to face away from him.
“Can you hold me?” She asked into the darkness of the room.
Steve scooted closer to her, wrapped his big arms securely around her middle and placed a chaste kiss on the back of her neck. “Always.”
Oh yes, bed-sharing was definitely something that Steve could get used to.
Next Chapter
Feedback is always welcome!❤️
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