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dreamwritesimagines · 2 days

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The Eye of the Hurricane [22] - Newcomers

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful feedback, you made my day! ❤️I hope you’ll like this chapter as well, and please don’t forget to tell me what you think! ❤️

Summary: New deals mean new players.

Word Count: 2300

Pairing: MobBoss!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Violence, guns, crime, blood, explicit language, dysfunctional relationship. This is an AU, friendly reminder that I don’t condone any of the actions depicted on this story and please read with care.

Series Masterlist

You had always loved watching the city at night.

When you were little, after making sure everyone else at home were asleep, you would sneak out of your room to get to the terrace, and sit there for hours, watching the glimmering stars and the city lights. Even after you grew up, it still filled you with a sense of peace-

Well.

Until now.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you only noticed Bucky’s presence in the living room when he touched your arm to hold out a cup of coffee. You paused for a moment, then shook your head.

“No thank you,” you murmured and he put it on the coffee table, then clicked his tongue.

“You didn’t sleep last night?”

“I couldn’t,” you managed to say. “I know I said I’d come to bed, but…”

A silence fell upon you before Bucky heaved a sigh from behind you.

“Charm, last night—”

“Was the proof, wasn’t it?” you asked. “He doesn’t believe in me.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It makes it official.”

“It doesn’t matter if it’s official or not.”

You shook your head again and he clasped his hands over your shoulders, your eyes fluttering close for a moment despite your better judgement, a warmth spreading over your skin before you opened your eyes again.

“The therapist said open communication,” he told you, making you roll your eyes.

“You don’t even believe in all that.”

“You do,” he said. “And he said we’re supposed to talk about our feelings so, how do you feel?”

“I want to kill Ian.”

“I don’t think that counts as a feeling, Charm.”

“Not with that attitude, it doesn’t.”

A small chuckle spilled from his lips.

“Listen, you know I have no problems with killing him, but you told me yourself that it’s not the way to putting you on top. Besides—” he paused and shook his head. “Your father named him his heir, and he’s not an idiot. He would know that we killed him, which is fine by me but…”

“That’d officially put an end to the truce,” you finished his sentence for him. “It’d make me look just like Ian, and then no one would back me up because the whole reason why we’re doing this is to keep the truce.”

“Not the whole reason.”

You turned your head to look at him and he scoffed a laugh.

“Come on Charm,” he said. “You can tell everyone else whatever you want but part of the reason why you want that crown is because you want power. It’s not the worst thing in the world.”

You swallowed thickly and turned around to see him better.

“I want to keep the peace.”

“Never said you didn’t,” he murmured. “But someone has to be on that throne while keeping the peace.”

You ran a hand over your face.

“The meeting is next month with the rest of the bosses,” you said. “If my father named him heir, it means he gave him some sort of responsibility, something to give him the opportunity to show off. A part of the territory, or…”

“He wouldn’t give him a part of the territory,” Bucky told you. “Not with HYDRA attacking every territory. He can’t afford any security flaws.”

You arched a brow. “Shipment?”

“Shipment,” Bucky said with a nod of his head and you tapped your lips with your finger, stepping away from him.

“That could make things easier for me,” you said. “And to make sure he makes a mistake.”

Bucky grinned at you.

“You know how it works,” he said. “A lot of things could go wrong with the shipments.”

The question you wanted to ask him was on the tip of your tongue but before you could open your mouth, his phone started vibrating and he took a look at the screen, then held it up.

“Speaking of shipment,” he said. “Excuse me.”

He answered the phone and walked away from you, and you bit inside your cheek, massaging your temples. Your headache from last night was getting heavier by the minute the more you thought about it, so you pressed your palms on your eyes, then dropped your hands.

“I need a nap,” you muttered to yourself and made your way to the bedroom with Alpine following you.

When you woke up from your nap to the nonstop vibration of your phone, it was already afternoon and as the note on bedside table told you, Bucky had already left for work. You rubbed at your eyes and grabbed your phone, pressing your lips together when you saw your father’s name flashing on the screen. For a couple of seconds, you considered not answering but the old habits were hard to shake off so you touched the screen and took the phone to your ear.

“Y/N, sweetheart,” he said. “I hope you weren’t busy?”

You bit inside your cheek, commanding yourself to be calm.

“Father.”

“We could barely talk last night,” he said. “How are you?”

“How do you think?” you asked back and he heaved a sigh.

“I’d rather it if we didn’t have this conversation on the phone,” he said, making you let out a dry chuckle.

“I agree.”

“But I’d like to invite you and Bucky for dinner whenever you’re free this week,” he said. “Your aunt is back in the city, she arrived this morning and she’s so excited to see you again.”

You rolled your eyes and made a face.

“She said that?”

“Of course. Despite some disagreements, we’re still a family and she knows it. So does Ian.”

You dragged the tip of your tongue over your teeth, willing yourself not to take the bait.

“I know you’re angry,” he said, making you raise your brows. “But in time, you will see that I’m looking out for you.”

“Oh do you now?”

“Y/N…”

“I’ll ask Bucky when he’s free this week,” you told him. “I can let your assistant know.”

“You can just let me know,” he told you. “It’d be a nice change, getting a phone call from you. Just saying.”

You bit back the retort and threw your shoulders back.

“Is there anything else, father?” you asked, your voice completely calm and he paused for a moment before heaving a sigh.

“No,” he said. “See you at dinner then.”

“Sure,” you said and hung up, then threw the phone on the other side of the bed with a groan. Alpine meowed from her spot on the floor and you hung your head off the side of the bed to see her better.

“Fathers, am I right?” you asked and she blinked at you, then made her way to you to plop down next to you. You reached out to scratch at her head and heaved a sigh.

“Do you want to come to that dinner?”

Alpine meowed again and ran back to her spot, making you click your tongue.

“Of course you don’t,” you said and sat up, then pushed yourself off the bed. “Very well then. Let’s text auntie Becca and Leila to see what they’re up to and if they want to go shopping with me. Some distraction can’t hurt.”

As it turned out, Becca and Leila were busy; Becca had therapy while Leila had to drop by her office to take care of some last minute changes. You did manage to distract yourself a little with shopping, and once you got bored you decided to pick up sandwiches from the shop you knew Bucky liked, then told your driver to take you to Bucky’s office.

When you got to Bucky’s office, his assistant greeted you and stood up.

“He’s about to be finished with his meeting, Mrs. Barnes,” she said as Bucky’s laughter reached outside, making you tilt your head.

“Sounds like a fun meeting.”

She offered you an apologetic smile.

“The sign of a deal gone well,” she said. “Miss Williams was already sure of herself when she walked in, I’m not surprised."

That made you arch a brow.

“Miss Williams?” you asked and she nodded.

“Mr. Barnes’ appointment,” she said, motioning inside and you nodded.

“Ah,” you said, your stomach doing an unpleasant flip for some reason before you threw your shoulders back. “I’m in a bit of a hurry actually, I’ll just—”

You didn’t even bother finishing your sentence as you walked to the door and knocked, then stepped inside and closed the door behind you. Bucky’s smile widened when he saw you and the woman sitting on the armchair across from his desk looked over her shoulder, letting you see her face.

Oh.

Well, apparently this Miss Williams was not only funny, but also very beautiful.

What you were feeling couldn’t possibly be jealousy of course, perhaps just mild irritation but you didn’t dwell on it as Bucky stood up to walk to you.

“Hi sweetheart,” he said, pressing a kiss on your temple. “Anna, this is Y/N, my wife. Y/N, this is Anna, our new shipment manager.”

You willed a smile on your face and walked to her as she stood up as well, then offered your hand.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too, Mrs. Barnes,” she said with a smile as she shook your hand. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

“So have I,” you said as Bucky went to sit behind his desk again and you took the armchair across from her. “Sam speaks very highly of you, Miss Williams.”

“Please call me Anna,” she said with a wave of her hand. “And I’m forever in Sam’s debt. He was the first person to actually give me a chance in all this.”

“Sam has a talent for finding the best people for the job,” Bucky said, making Anna grin.

“I’ll make sure to tell him that.”

“No no, don’t,” Bucky told her. “He will hold it over my head forever.”

You bit inside your cheek, trying to shake off the discomfort pulling at your stomach before you crossed your legs.

“Oh but I must tell him,” Anna teased him. “He’s my first reference after all. There has to be some loyalty.”

“Can I by any chance buy your loyalty?”

“I wouldn’t be standing here if anyone could buy my loyalty,” Anna said with a grin, making Bucky chuckle.

“Very well then.”

It wasn’t jealousy.

Of course it wasn’t, you and Bucky weren’t even together.

In any case, you were irritated because this was a business decision and Bucky had decided to hire her without so much as your input, that was all.

That had to be it.

Anna’s phone beeped and she took a look at the screen, then gasped.

“Oh I completely lost the track of time!” she said, jumping on her feet. “I had another meeting, I’m so sorry.”

“Not a problem,” Bucky said, standing up as well. “So my people will send your people the details then.”

“That sounds good,” she said and shook his hand. “Looking forward to doing business with you, Bucky.”

First name basis.

Great.

“And it was a pleasure to meet you,” she told you and you nodded, giving her a smile.

“The pleasure is all mine.”

“I’ll see you later then,” she told Bucky and walked out of the office, then closed the door behind her. You tried to get rid of the bitter taste in your mouth, then cleared your throat, shifting your weight.

“The new shipment manager?” you asked and Bucky nodded.

“She’s a genius,” he told you, making you arch a brow. “Seriously, I thought Sam was exaggerating it, but apparently he downplayed it.”

You picked at a piece of lint on your dress, humming.

“I thought I was going to be involved in the business decisions,” you said, making him frown slightly.

“Yeah but this has nothing to do with your father’s business,” he said. “Or the plan. It’s just shipment, and I killed the last guy because he tried to kill me. You were there.”

“Right.”

“Sam vouched for her,” he reminded you and you shrugged your shoulders.

“Yeah I know, it’s just…” you trailed off and shook your head. “Never mind.”

“Charm.”

“I just think it’s funny you had no problem involving me when it was a guy, and now that it’s a very hot woman, you decided not to involve me.”

“That’s not what it’s—are you actually jealous?” he asked as if the mere idea was ridiculous and you let out a small laugh.

“Jealous?” you repeated. “Get over yourself Buck. You told me I would be involved in the business decisions, you can’t blame me for questioning whether it has changed.”

He gave you a chiding look.

“It hasn't,” he said. “Sam vouched for her, and it’s just one shipment right now as a trial period. I can give you her file if you want.”

You rolled your eyes and shook your head.

“No, if you decided she’s good, I’m not going to muddy the waters,” you said. “Trial period it is.”

Bucky narrowed his eyes. “And you’re sure it’s just the business side of things?”

You scoffed.

“No, this is me telling you I desire you carnally,” you spat, making him chuckle and hold up his hands.

“Fine,” he said. “Just asking.”

“I brought you lunch but if you’re going to be like this, I’ll eat what I brought in front of you—”

“You brought lunch?” he cut you off, staring at you and you nodded.

“Yeah, why?”

“Marry me.”

“Way ahead of you on that one,” you deadpanned, then let out a laugh. “Why?”

“I haven’t eaten anything whole day,” he said, running a hand through his hair. “What did you bring?”

“Sandwiches from that shop you like.”

“Jesus, you’re amazing,” he told you and you grinned, then stood up from the armchair.

“I really am,” you told him as you walked to get the paper bags from the waiting room. “Make sure to keep that in mind, will you?”

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dondeeee911 · 3 days

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What does your person secretly want to tell you?

Shhhhhh!

1> 2> 3

Pile 1

They want to confess to you that they secretly hate their place of work, which they keep to themselves and would not like to share amongst you and others openly. Your joy, peace, dreams, beauty, and desires are what inspire them to keep striving for more. They eat, sleep, and breathe you. Your person doesn’t want to let you down, that pretty face of yours, could they?🥹“I promise baby, I promise I’ll make it happen; I promise”. The odds of you being able to tell if something isn’t right with your person are rare. Kisses and warm hugs are a norm when they come home, they mask their emotions well or they don’t like you see them in a state of “weakness”. Yes, all of their hard work is to keep you happy but what about their happiness? They think about that often.

Pile 2

Unfortunately, your person resents you. Don’t get me wrong, you are one of the most loving individuals they have ever met, but they can’t seem to wrap their mind around the fact that you tolerated so much of their BS in the relationship. IYKYK😣,They don’t feel like they possess the love they once had for you in the early stages. Your person misses the girl who was tedious about her do’s and don’ts, speaking up for herself and threatening to end the whole connection! They miss the girl who wasn’t scared to leave and choose better. You once had them on their toes and willing to lose it all for you; but they do not know what happened to you, where did “that girl” go? Sadly, they hate to admit that they do not care to try anymore or put in any effort to show their passion for you, if any. They feel like you gave up on your morality, so they gave up on you too.😓

Pile 3

Ouch! sounds like someone’s pockets hurt😂😩. Okay, we all love the nicer things in life but your partners think you spend an awful amount of time indulging in your luxuries. Maybe pick up a hobby, a side hustle? 🤷🏽‍♀️A true spendthrift you are, and no, they don’t want you to limit yourself ever! But they hate the way you spend money so carelessly. Random purchase after random purchase. “Why did you buy that?” idk lol. You have no sense of purpose or direction when making purchases. Watching you spend like a kid in a candy store gets under their skin sooooo badly. They want to give you a budget, but what’s a budget in your world!?🤑

#channeled message #pac #pick a pile #oracle #future spouse #love #intutive reading #romance #pick a card

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 3 days

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I think malleus mentions, maybe in his dorm vig, that he tried approaching other students when he couldn't find the meeting place but they scream and run away from him in terror. If this is how people have been reacting to him approaching them then it makes sense for him to stop trying at one point. also think the senators never allowed anyone to meet him. Remember melanoir blessing. She blessed him to be feared by humans. Perhaps that is also at play. I would like to hear your thoughts on this.

One thing I take issue with is how inconsistently written the world’s reactions to Malleus are. On one hand, we're constantly told that people fear him and run away at the sight of him (which does happen with various mob students). On the other hand, we get dozens and dozens of instances of Malleus interacting with his classmates, staff, and the locals of Sage’s Island (Magicam Monsters) and other countries without issue. (Granted, the locals of other countries did not recognize him as Malleus due to how he was dressed, but the point still holds that Malleus can have normal interactions with people.) How he is received varies greatly across the main story, vignettes, and the events. You cannot have it both ways because it creates this cognitive dissonance about how we’re supposed to perceive his presence.

As for the senators, it is canon that Malleus was often kept inside the castle. However, that doesn’t mean he was entirely barred from interacting with people and that doesn’t mean Malleus never left. Clearly he still had tutors and servants around (although interacting with them would be different than interacting with peers), and surely he would have met his grandmother or foreign dignitaries as part of his training. He has also visited Silver and Lilia in their cottage which is far away from the capital city. Malleus has realistically had opportunities to engage with people, no matter how much the senators try to leash him.

Finally, on the subject of Meleanor’s blessing: firstly, there is no immediate indication that Melanor cast a spell of any kind. If you compare the scene where she utters the “blessing” (7-77) to when Lilia blesses Silver and changes his hair color (7-81), there is no sparkle effect to indicate magic. Meleanor asks Lilia to take care of her kid, hands her egg off to Lilia, summons thorns to drag him away, then vanishes away to fight, so the sparkle effect that proceeds is most likely to show her teleporting off to combat (which is finally when the sparkle effect comes in). Right before leaving, she says, “May the Night bless you/Night's Blessings (in EN)”, which is where I believe people got the “Meleanor blessed/cursed Malleus to be feared by humans” headcanon comes from. However, the phrase “May the Night bless you/Night's Blessings” is not a magic incantation as far as we know; it seems to be a saying among nocturnal fae to wish one another good luck. We see Lilia and others saying it in other parts of book 7. However, Lilia does utter “May the Night bless you/Night's blessings” prior to Silver’s hair color change, so I imagine this also plays a part in the fandom interpretation/headcanon that Meleanor blessed Malleus in a similar manner.

Even if it was a real blessing, it doesn’t work for me with how they’ve set up Malleus’s interactions with his peers. If the blessing/curse is supposedly making him feared by humans, how come there are several blatant exceptions who don’t fear him at all? This includes the light trio and arguably even characters like Leona or Rollo—because even feelings of hate or rivalry are still not fear. Additionally, Meleanor’s phrasing is that she’s sure that Malleus will be a good omen/“auspicious star” for the fae of Briar Country but a “fearsome, malevolent star” for humans. With the coming of book 7, Malleus is posing a real threat to both fae and humans alike. Furthermore, she directly follows up these lines by saying she entrusts her son to Lilia. She’s emphasizing the importance of Malleus to their country’s future before handing him away; it does not read like she’s blessing her child. This, combined with the very delayed sparkle effect in 7–77, leads me to believe that Meleanor’s words were not actually magically binding or a blessing, but rather a hope or a prayer about the kind of person Malleus would be someday: a leader that their country needs and someone who will strike fear into humans (who were enemies of the fae at the time). Until the canon says otherwise, this is how I interpret Meleanor's "blessing" for her son (ie it’s not a magical one).

I feel like none of these should completely dissuade Malleus from like... I don't know, going out of his way to locate a few open-minded people (again, like the light trio) and trying to make conversation with them? Maybe invite them over for tea? Taking little steps like that. I understand why he would be hesitant to try or adopt a defeatist attitude, but again Lilia is right there to help facilitate or to ask questions to. But he doesn’t really do that or seem to truly take what anyone says to heart; instead he gets moody, pouty, and sulks when he feels rejected because the situation is artificially set up for failure 💦

It sometimes feels like TWST wrote itself into a corner with Malleus’s presentation due to the nature of the original game format. His lore calls for him to be sinister and feared through all the land, but the devs are simultaneously compelled to write him in cute and silly social scenarios to show how likable he can be (so open up your wallet for him/j)… He’s supposedly always forgotten but you’d think that someone with a presence as fearsome as his would be remembered vividly or make a strong impression regardless of the contrived ways they try to keep him out of the picture… and that results in the clashing tones I notice now.

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ineffable-opinions · 3 days

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Danmei tropes in My Stand-In

This is a quick introduction to some popular BL tropes that are fairly new to live-action BL:

wife chasing crematorium

substitute lover

transmigration

(Contains spoilers)

All corrections and critiques are welcome.

As you probably know My Stand-In is based on the danmei novel Professional Body Double. Specifically, it belongs to 188男团 (“188 group” where 188 cm is the height of every gong (seme) in the novel series). It is a shared universe of novels with characters from one featuring in another and almost all gong are very scummy (or “red-flag” so to speak) initially.

Trope #1: wife chasing crematorium

What 188 group novels all have in common is the trope popularly known among English-speaking fandom as “wife chasing crematorium”. This is a super-popular trope, not only in danmei.

origin 追妻火葬场 (zhuī qī huǒzàng chǎng; chasing his wife’s crematorium) derived from the longer phrase 傲娇一时爽，追妻火葬场 (àojiāo yīshí shuǎng, zhuī qī huǒzàng chǎng; Tsundere was on his high horse for a while, now chasing his wife’s crematorium.) Alternative form: 追夫火葬场 (zhuī fū huǒzàng chǎng; chasing husband’s crematorium) – usually involves scum shou (uke) chasing after his gong (seme) after initially abusing gong’s love.

The trope involves the love interest being initially cold or even cruel to the protagonist who is in love. This continues until all of that love gone. By then, the love interest would have come to his senses, eager to seek forgiveness and chase after the protagonist. In some cases, the love is already lost irrevocably, especially when the protagonist is dead – hence, literal crematorium. There are also works where the love interest is discarded all together and protagonist moves on to someone else. Rarely, there are works where the protagonist is the scum.

In 188 group novels, this is how the basic structure of wife chasing crematorium:

Shou loves gong. Gong treats shou terribly.

Gong goes too far. Shou is fed-up and leaves gong, one way or other. Gong realises that he has been in love all along.

Gong regrets his action and chases after shou. Grovelling ensues.

Gong and shou gets back together. Gong dotes on shou and the couple face other challenges (family, villains) together, if any. Happy ending.

Fans are in it for the melodrama. They want to watch scummy gong to go too far, the relationship to break down and for the gong to grovel and make amends through various selfless deeds, until they reestablish the relationship and trust (as much as possible). Every one of those stories end with a happy ending with the gong endlessly doting on shou and the relationship having turned wholesome.

Trope #2: substitute lover

Other than the previous trope Professional Body Double and its adaptation My Stand-In involves the “substitute lover” trope.

Substitute lover trope involves, usually the gong, having a 白月光 (white moonlight): a person whom he loves a lot but can’t reach/touch. This is usually his first love and has a profound impact on him.

Aside: White moonlight in itself is a common trope. Both Vip Only and Sahara Sensei to Toki-kun used white moonlight trope to in a typical kishōtenketsu narrative structure.

Since white moonlight is unattainable, gong finds a substitute lover.

The relationship between gong and substitute lover is usually just physical. This is because gong doesn’t plan to move on from white moonlight, instead stubbornly carries the torch. Gong doesn’t plan on betraying the pure feeling he have for his white moonlight by giving any of his love to anyone else. So, he tries to ensure that no love leaks out of the dam he has built to store his love for the white moonlight. This is, from gong’s POV, a kind of emotional fidelity which he extends to his white moonlight. A tribute of gong’s unshakable love for his white moonlight.

The substitute lover sometimes resembles white moonlight in some way –

in body – first ever live action BL (shonen-ai actually) adaptation Summer Vacation 1999 (1988) based of Hagio Moto’s The Heart of Thomas plays around with this trope, a lot. More recently, Playboyy sorta lampshaded it with the twins premise.

in spirit – a recent example is Love is Better the Second Time Around wherein prof. Takashi sleeps with his assistant Shiraishi Yuto because the assistant (or his desperation at least) reminded him of his white moonlight Miyata Akihiro.

Aside: There is only one live-action BL that actively subverted this trope: HIStory3: Make Our Days Count. The series introduced a doppelgänger of Yu XiGu (Xiang HaoTing’s white moonlight), a perfect candidate for substitute lover trope. But instead of pursuing it, they subverted the trope.

There are usually two outcomes to the substitute lover trope:

gong falls for substitute lover. In some cases, this involves white moonlight turning into rival or villain.

gong and his white moonlight get together. In this case, substitute lover turn into rival or get a lover of his own.

Itsuka no Kimi e, first ever live-action adaptation of a yaoi manga, employed substitute lover trope in one of its best executions. It is so brilliantly done that I can’t think of anything topping that, unless 4th volume (particularly the case-solving plot involving the photography club) of Takumi-kun series gets live action adaptation.

Trope #3: transmigration

Basic premise of Professional Body Double and its adaptation My Stand-In revolves around transmigration of soul.

This too is a popular trope in BL. One of the most popular danmei Mo Dao Zu Shi and its adaptation The Untamed involves this trope.

Maybe I should say set-up instead of trope for this one. Transmigration involves soul of a character getting transferred to a body different from his own at the time of triggering event.

Own body, different time – either past or future. When past is involved, it is likely a do-over story where the protagonist gets to redo their life, change their love interest, make different life choices, take different course of action, etc.

Reincarnation – completely different lifetime but with retained memories of past-life/lives. Until We Meet Again; Choco Milk Shake (different lifetime for the pets)

Different body, present (near-present) time – character’s soul enters a different person’s body. The character gets involved in his previous circumstances but now in a different capacity. Revive (2016), that danmei adaptation no one ever talks about, went to town with this set-up.

Different body, different life – soul enters character in a book, game, simulation, etc. and would be primarily tasked to thrive there. One Room Angel (2023) explored a type of badro with this set-up.

With transmigration set-up, it is common to have one of these two:

Transmigrator retaining some connection to previous life.

Transmigrator’s previous life doesn’t matter anymore.

These Tropes in My Stand-In

These tropes are explored to varying degrees and with different levels of efficiency in Professional Body Double. In its live-action adaptation, there are a bunch of limitations. Primary one being the cultural difference – audience of a danmei novel are already familiar with these tropes to some extend but the live-action audience is one which has been primarily consuming sweet BL from Thailand that are inherently deficient in BL literacies.

Another is the khujin problem. Branded pairs are very important to Thai BL industry, so they cannot have two different actors playing before and after transmigration. (Actually, this was not impossible but there hasn’t been any precedent. Also, The Untamed enjoyed success by having Xiao Zhan play pre- and post-transmigration Wei WuXian. I wish they tried two khujin (UpPoom & UpWinner) one couple, since they chose to introduce Winner as pre-transmigration Joe. I don’t know, maybe that’s asking for fan wars and pitting actors against each other.)

Third limitation is one that comes from medium – you can’t have long monologues in live-action. This deprives audience of the inner workings of character’s minds. Most of the motives, especially Ming’s trouble with warring desires of his heart, is inaccessible to the audience. @clairedaring have posted a deep-dive by Liltsu into some of that here.

Aside: Another interesting trope is giving watch (a taboo gift) – Chinese superstition rising from 送钟 (gifting watch) and 送终 (to bury the dead/attend funeral) being homophones. Taboo gift trope - white lilies associated with death and funerals - have appeared in Summer Vacation 1999 (1988) and Forbidden Love; both of these have substitute lover and death.

Ming’s characterization as a young master, coming from money and prestige that breeds arrogance and deficient in empathy (this post by @tungtung-thanawat is particularly enlightening) is a highlight of his cruelty as a 188 group gong.

While redemption of scum gong is what 188 group offers its audience, it is not necessarily what live-action audience would be wanting from the set-up. It is likely that a part of the audience was in fact looking for revenge plot.

As @lurkingshan highlighted in this post there is no exploration of identity (tied to Joe’s body pre- and post-transmigration) forth-coming precisely because this isn’t that kind of story and body is only treated as a temporary shelter for the soul for most part when transmigration trope is involved. Moreover, the novel is steeped in Confucian values. So, most of the resolution to what it means for Joe to have a mother now is dealt through his selfless gratitude and the filial piety he offers her.

The same is the case with his old body – a proper funeral for that body is what he owes his own parents for having given flesh and blood to the body which housed his soul previously. Remarkably, his own house figures prominently as an inheritance and as an enduring connection to his own parents – a bond more precious to that him than the bond he had to his old body. I am unsure how much of those core Confucian values they will retain in the live-action adaptation, given the cultural difference.

As @befuddledcinnamonroll discusses here, it is tied to cultural ideas of self, religious beliefs, etc.

@bengiyo has pointed out a weakness in execution of the transmigration trope over the substitute lover trope: the latter is a recurring and inverted trope in this series while the former plays out straight. Even though it is clear that coma!Joe is basically friendless and his career already dead (or that he has no career to speak of), it might have been better to hint at a lack of resolution and impending doom, and build anticipation by leaving clues about the troubles that coma!Joe has left behind. That way when the substitute lover trope peaks again, audience would feel as trapped as Joe.

This is where I think Revive (2016) did a better job with friends, colleagues, past-lovers and rivals especially with such similar set-ups: entertainment industry, classism, scum gong, and intersecting lives pre- and post-transmigration.

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mariacallous · 14 hours

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I plan on voting for Biden in November. But it’s terrible. A vote for him is still a vote that will not significantly improve our deepest and most troubling social problems. He won’t give us Medicare for All or any other badly needed boosts to social programs. He will probably continue to support policies that actively oppress BIPOC. He will not help us. He’s also a sexual predator. Truly, I do not want to vote for this man. This is not the man I wanted to vote for. I don’t want him in office. He is simply not good enough. This man doesn’t represent what I want at all.

But if I don’t vote for Biden in November, I feel like I’m making it that much easier for Trump to win another election. And I want that even less than I want a Biden presidency. I don’t want another 4 years of what we have now. No fucking way. No.

I’m so conflicted. I feel like there is blood on my hands. I feel like I’m casting a vote for death and misery if I’m not voting for a progressive candidate with a progressive platform. I feel like I’m committing nothing short of an atrocity no matter what I choose to do. I don’t want to harm people, and yet, won’t I essentially be doing exactly that? I just want to do the right thing. I don’t want to bring harm, or perpetuate harm towards anyone.

Trump will probably win anyway. He’s doing all he can to ensure that, and it will probably work. The impending climate disaster will kill us all because we will clearly continue to do nothing. Our bodies will be riddled with micro and nanoplastics. America will become an even more of an inhospitable police state.

Nobody will hold Biden accountable for anything if he wins, and he’ll never give us the public policies we desperately need.

“Is this what hope feels like? I’d forgotten,” you tweeted recently. How? And for what? I see nothing but bad things to come. I feel a deep sense of hopelessness and despair.

There are plenty of reasons to feel hopelessness and despair right now, but with regard to Joe Biden, you are wasting a whole bunch of negative emotions on a giant pile of shitty beliefs that just aren’t true.

First, and let me be very clear on this one, Joe Biden is not a sexual predator. He’s just not. Believe me, I would be shouting it from the rooftops if I thought he were. When Tara Reade went public, I took her allegations very seriously. I gave her extra helpings of the benefit of the doubt, but it turned out there was a mountain of evidence suggesting that Reade has always been a lying, manipulative grifter (which I didn’t want to be true), and there was another mountain of evidence suggesting that the predatory behavior alleged by Reade is simply not in Biden’s character (which I was very reluctant to trust). There was a time when I was hopeful that Reade’s accusations might even knock Biden out of the race, but I’m not the kind of person who believes a thing merely because I want it to be true. It’s fine if you want to criticize Biden for what appears to be a history of awkward or retrospectively inappropriate behavior. Hell, you can even buy into all that “Creepy Uncle Joe” bullshit, but you’re just plain wrong if you insist that Joe Biden is a sexual predator. (Obviously, the same cannot be said of Donald Trump, who is a straight-up serial rapist with a list of at least twenty-five women who have publicly and credibly accused him of sexual assault.)

As for your policy concerns, I understand your frustration. I would love to be voting for a far-left ultra-progressive firebrand of a candidate in the upcoming general election. That would feel wonderful, right up until the moment that she loses in a landslide, and I guarantee you, a far-left ultra-progressive candidate would get her ass handed to her by Trump. That’s not an outcome we can afford as a species, much less as a nation. You understand this, which is why you still plan on voting for Biden. Good. I’m really glad you’re not being a purist asshole about this. The evil garbage monsters in the GOP just love a left-wing purist who refuses to vote responsibly. Republicans are desperately praying to their imaginary white Jesus that all the Green Party crunch bars will fuck it up for the rest of us like they did back in 2016. We cannot let that happen again.

Listen, I’m not gonna try and convince you to like Joe Biden. You’re already gonna vote for him, so I’m perfectly fine if you hate his breathing guts. What I do want from you is a little maturity, some vision, and a realistic sense of scale. No one candidate will ever be the solution to our problems — not Bernie, not Liz, and certainly not Joe. At best, a candidate is a vector, a course correction, a desperately needed step in the right direction. That’s all we can expect from Biden, and he is bringing it. He’s bringing it every single day with a list of policy positions that are more progressive than any President’s in the history of the United States, and he most certainly brought it with the selection of Kamala Harris as his running mate.

Biden recognizes his place in history. He knows he is little more than a national stop-gap, a post-Trump tourniquet to stanch the bleeding. His Vice-Presidency and eventual Presidency will be a line of demarcation between two very distinct chapters of American history. This is more than just bridging the Boomer/Millennial generational divide. In the distant future (if we have one), it is my sincerest hope that Biden will be remembered as “The Last of the Old White Men,” a happy warrior who marked the end of a certain kind of Modern America and who helped usher in a new kind of Postmodern America. Those terms are clunky and loaded and absolutely will not stand the test of time, but we’re not the ones who get to name what we’re about to become. We’re the ones who have to keep doing the hard work to finally get us there, and that’s why I really need you to change your whole fucking attitude.

This shit is going to be grueling. The fight will be brutal if not bloody, and there is absolutely no room for whiners and layabouts. You want to improve our deepest and most troubling social problems? Great. Quit moaning about doing harm with your vote and go do some actual good with your own two fucking hands. Pulling a lever in a voting booth every couple years is the bare minimum. In terms of civic duty, it is the absolute least you can do. Of course Biden won’t give us Medicare for All. Neither would Sanders or Warren. That’s not how any of this works. Presidents don’t give us shit. We do it ourselves. We demand it, loudly and with force, and over long stretches of time, with enough solidarity and sustained action, laws are enacted and policies change.

I was around when the Clintons tried deadlifting their universal health care plan off the ground back in 1993. Maybe you remember it, maybe you weren’t even born yet, but that’s how long this shit takes. It’ll have been three fucking decades and two fucking generations of Democrats trying desperately to kick that gutbucket up Capitol Hill by the time we finally get around to some semblance of a single payer healthcare system. Thirty fucking years, my friend. That’s the kind of patience and perseverance the American experiment demands of us, so quit your fucking whining. Enough with all the pearl-clutching and hand-wringing. Take all your conflicted navel gazing bullshit and toughen the fuck up, buttercup.

You are on the right side of history. You are with the good guys. Quit your fucking bitching, and get out there and help us win.

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writers-potion · 8 hours

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Hello there. New to tumblr and really enjoying your posts. Can I please ask if you have any ideas/advice on how to write the experience of seeing and hearing things others don't and the disorienting feeling of trying to distinguish this from reality? Thank you 💚

Writing Characters With Special Senses

Hey! Thanks for the ask :)

I’m going to categorize the various types of “hallucinations” your characters may experience:

Super-Sensitive Senses

This is where your character would see/hear/smell things that others cannot. Hypersensitivity is generally considered a superpower, but what if it gets too much?

Your character can hear the sound of people’s blood flowing in their veins…which is indistinguishable from the sound of the nearby river, or the water flowing from a tap.

A party or buffet always smells faintly of blood from the barbeque/steak being served…which smells dangerously close to human blood, making a party smell like a murder scene for the character.

You can depict the disadvantages of hypersensitivity where being able to pick up minute stimuli actually creates confusion for the character as to what they’re sensing is even real or not. They might:

Be scared of going outside because the world is simply too much for them to process

Get a headache

Develop random sets of allergies

So, your character might:

Try to impair their sense of smell/sight, etc. because a flood of stimuli is actually painful for them

Avoid certain places and people

Befriend animals with senses above that of a human. A character who can smell extremely well will vibe with their Golden Retriever more than their human buddies.

Struggle with anxiety that something bad is happening. When you have too much stimuli to process, one of them will always tend to be ominous.

Seeing Another Realm

This is where your character has “The Sight” per se. They see elves, fairies, demons that others cannot see.

They feel scared and horrified. They might even seek psychological help and try to “kill” what they see. If they still can’t get rid of them, they may choose to ignore them.

On the other hand, the character might try to befriend and follow the things they see. They may actually have fun chasing and exploring these outworldly creatures. But once the Sight fades or the creatures disappear, they’re left teary and empty.

They may cope with this by drawing pictures and writing diaries about what they see.

Gamified Reality

This is where your character is living in a “game world” or the world suddenly becomes (partly) gamified for them. They’ll see instruction panels popping up, HP bars or see profiles of other people as game characters.

Your character might have fun with this “game”, but slowly start to confuse the purpose of their life with the tasks handed to them by this “game”

Your character starts to over rely on the game to form relationships. For example, let’s say a character can see a “Likeability Score” to determine how much the other person likes them. They start distrusting people with a lower number and obsess over increasing the “Likeability Score” rather than being themselves.

One day, the gamified reality suddenly disappears, but the character is left living in that reality, viewing the world as a gamer would.

Hallucinating

This is where the character actually sees stuff that doesn’t exist at all. Generally, these hallucinations will originate from a preexisting (almost always negative) memory, or is the result of a compulsion the character has.

The character may make up a chant to make the bad memories/hallucinations go away. (e.g. “he’s gone, he’s gone, this isn’t real.”)

The character has a sign of their own which helps them distinguish hallucinations. For example, the hallucinations might be extremely real but with a slight red glow to them.

The character may actually talk nicely to the hallucinations to go away and wait for them to fade. Each time they meet someone, they would mutter, "please go", wait for two seconds and if the person doesn't lose transparency, you know they're real.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* . ───

💎If you like my blog, buy me a coffee☕ and find me on instagram!

💎Before you ask, check out my masterpost part 1 and part 2

💎For early access to my content, become a Writing Wizard

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9w1ft · 2 days

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i wanna be LSK but… //

I’m so sorry anon, but I personally find it really funny when people hear the songs where taylor is working through her feelings of being betrayed by Scott B and attribute them to karlie instead.

It’s like finding a man holding a gun standing over a dead body and saying, hang on a minute… what if the real murderer is the victim’s gf… because two of her friends liked a gossipy tweet written by a known shit-stirrer!

that is to say, we know for a fact that taylor felt deeply betrayed by scott b, seeing as he’s verifiably the actual person who sold her masters to scooter, after treating taylor like family since she was very young. it’s pretty self-evident he deserves the level of vitriol in the smallest man who ever lived (besides the other descriptive details that link him to tsmwel, mtr etc).

as for taylor and karlie suddenly never being seen together again (seemingly drifting apart a whole year before the heist even happened, remember?), well she hasn’t spoken on that, so naturally we read between the lines in the songs to find out. some people have taken the masters heist songs to be about karlie, and ran with that. but others see karlie and taylor’s retreat into privacy reflected in songs under the ‘love blackout’ theme (especially around here, you’re on a longtime kaylor blog 🙈)

love blackout = the hints taylor has put out again and again that she intentionally distanced her public image from karlie’s because it was too dangerous to carry on as openly as they had at first. 2016 election sadness themes, secret love themes, all consistent over the years. all while writing new love songs that use callbacks to the rep muse, to yail even 🥺. as if taylor’s been using all the confusion and her masterful quill of misdirection to achieve her priority of protecting karlie. not protecting karlie’s public image and clout with swifties, which she doesn’t need to maintain her success because she was always successful in her own right! no, it’s all for Karlie The Person in their secret bubble of reality. all this showmanship, you know. the great war, hello!!!! too many songs to name where the kaylor chandelier is safely out of sight, but you can still see flickers through the boarded up windows ❣️

so forgive me for having a chuckle. to any anons who sincerely🛸want to believe, I’m just throwing it out there that there are plenty of us that never found the karlie-betrayer theory convincing at all. if you take a closer look at everything, the timeline of events and all the songs since, does it really make sense? (especially when there are so many shitty men in the mix who are more obviously to blame lol)

~ if you post, thank you for facilitating this rant 9wing, I’ll get off my soapbox now xxx

yup yup

i think a lot of people are predisposed to blaming karlie and so everything becomes a sort of confirmation bias.. which partially, i would argue, was by design.. so in a sense i do not fault gaylors or others for falling into this hole. but i do sometimes feel like faulting them a tiny bit for those who never climb out of it. there’s plenty of information and clues needed to figure it out and climb out of it.

one thing i don’t like about the whole “let’s not talk about muses” discourse is while the spirit of it is supposed to be “let’s study why these songs sound gay instead of commenting taylor lyrics on these people’s instagram pages,” in practice the phrasing almost is like giving yourself permission to pass judgement on the people in taylor’s story and then never reevaluate them. people often say ~lets not talk muses that’s invasive and gross~ and conveniently refuse to adjust their perception of karlie (for example) based on what taylor is putting out there, while making convenient exceptions for any interpretation they find that works to reinforce their already negative perception of her. and then after bitching about her they’ll cover their timeline in lisa frank dolphins because apparently that’s what paradise is. i dunno. it all feels dystopian to me atp 😆

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amerricanartwork · 1 day

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I want to say I love reading your headcanons, especially your Iterator ones. Do you have a unique headcanons for Pebbles, since you haven't talked about him much?

Ohhh, I'm so glad to hear that!! I love creating and typing down these headcanons, but sometimes I worry whether anyone actually wants to read these long posts about it, so it's always so nice to hear people appreciate them!

I would love to talk more about Five Pebbles! I actually have quite a few headcanons for him specifically since I tend to ponder him a lot. In fact, of all the canon characters, when it comes to headcanons that aren't purely working out their general personality and backstory I think I currently have more outside headcanons for him than anyone else.

But nonetheless, assuming you mean "unique" as "interesting and relatively uncommon/unheard of in the fandom", here's one of mine that might seem odd or specific, but I really like it!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

I’ve headcanoned for at least a few months now that Five Pebbles is very much an auditory learner. He’s more receptive to spoken and auditory information than just written text, and as such he tends to talk a lot, which is how he best formulates his ideas.

Now, when I call him an auditory learner (or maybe just an audio-oriented person in general would be a better way to describe it), I also mean he generally cares a lot about how things “sound” to him. Five Pebbles pays close attention to how certain sounds “feel” in a sense, not just with regular abstract sounds, but spoken words, phrases, and ideas too. He likes it when sentences flow smoothly, convey the proper emotion or idea, and sound intellectual and well-thought-out, and dislikes when phrases sound clunky, confusing, or otherwise unprofessional and improper. In situations where he wants to appear smart and sophisticated, especially in a competitive sense, he loves flexing his extremely large vocabulary by throwing in long and obscure words and technical jargon too. To reference my last headcanon ask, this trait is another quality making him dislike NSH, who doesn’t care as much about grammar or syntax and thus tends to speak in casual ways Pebbles finds “improper”.

Usually, when he has a decent amount of uninterrupted personal time, Pebbles will spend several hours on end just talking to himself in his chamber to work out his ideas and plan any essays or speeches he’s preparing to give. He loves making sure that every sentence sounds pleasing, proper, and is grammatically correct, yet still explains his ideas thoroughly and accurately. However, despite being an introvert who values his alone time, he sometimes talks about his ideas to other iterators, especially when he wants feedback and criticism. In fact, having long discussions and debates, particularly about scientific, artistic, and philosophical matters, is perhaps one of the only things he actively enjoys doing with other people.

In this latter regard, this habit was actually one of the only reasons he occasionally, yet still actively sought out the presence of Unparalleled Innocence, someone whom I headcanon he never had much of a relationship at all with, positive or negative (at least pre-AU, that is). But nonetheless, Innocence is a very good listener and never declined an invitation to talk with him, though more often than not it turned more into him just rambling about something and her quietly listening and encouraging him to continue on (which she did for… other reasons besides her fascination with the subjects of his speeches, but I will get to those some other day…)

Another facet to this headcanon is that Pebbles has a strong appreciation for music. He finds it helps him calm down and work through his emotions very well, alongside one other habit I’ll address in a more official headcanon post. Thus, he’s got various music pearls with his favorite tunes that he’ll listen to while working or when he needs to relax. The purple one in Rivulet’s campaign is only one of many, though that was also the only one he could obtain at the time his chamber was broken into by the rot.

His love of music has always been another little “worldly pleasure” that he took for granted, not realizing just how much he enjoyed it until after mass-ascension. And even then, he stuffed it deep inside him and kept trying to downplay its value to him all the way until his rot condition was almost at its climax. This emotional turmoil I imagine him having is a particular element of his character arc I find very interesting even in regular Downpour canon, but once again I will elaborate on it more later…

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Anyway, there's the headcanon! Seeing as I'm planning to explain major character info in official headcanon posts, I tried to choose one that wasn't too essential for narrative comprehension, but is still unique and hopefully decently entertaining in-and-of itself. I also tried to use this to test a new format of doing more sketches for these headcanon posts, so it's not as much pure text.

Anyway, I hope you like it! And if you (or anyone else reading this, for that matter) ever want more headcanons, or can add to this one, don't be afraid to send another ask!

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buddiesmutslut · 2 days

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Do we really think Buck went straight to Tommy after leaving Eddie’s house after their talk about Kim? Like, this man is WORRIED about his best friend, and we think he really skipped to the dude he’s been on a few almost-dates with and couldn’t WAIT to gossip about it?

Like, first of all, that’s definitely not Buck’s story to tell. Even if it was, that’s a long ass history to share for any of it to make sense?? & sure, maybe Tommy is a mutual friend, but he’s a NEW mutual friend. If Buck’s worried about Eddie, there are several other people he could call if he thought outside help was needed, including Bobby, who he has called for Eddie before, (& even then! He didn’t give Bobby the full story bc it’s not his place). This all took place before everything with the house happened, so I’m fully convinced that he would have called Bobby for help before we went gossiping to his new boy toy about it.

And even if it Buck & Tommy are to the place of “pillow talk” (which idk, Buck moves fast, but this is a whole new ballgame, so who knows), this REALLY doesn’t seem like the kind of thing you mention to someone who you haven’t even called your boyfriend yet.

I’m trying to keep my Tommy opinions to myself bc I really don’t want to get into a whole ass argument online, but this is making it seem like Tommy is anywhere near the level of friendship that Buck & Eddie & the 118 have together, & it also paints Buck as a shitty friend, and while he can be a bit self-centered at times (bc of the trauma) I don’t think he’s this type of shitty friend.

Eddie is so closed off, & plays so much close to the chest, even now. If Buck went blabbing about something that Eddie himself is also worried about, I think that would break some of the trust between them.

Maybe that’s the point, maybe they’re trying to show Buck rushing into yet another relationship & not considering the consequences & Eddie finds out and that’s why they’re not as close going into next season, but idk. I feel like that would have to be a deliberate choice on the writers side bc it doesn’t feel in character for Buck at this point.

#eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #ryan guzman #oliver stark #I’m not tagging Tommy bc I’m already riding the edge of a panic attack and if anyone is mean to me I stg I’m going to breakdown 🤣

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youcouldmakealife · 2 days

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KS Fill: Robbie/Matty barista!au; redirection

Another one of the extras, this time a request for a continuation of the Robbie/Matty barista!au.

Here's the YCMAL wiki page for the barista!au, with links to previous parts if you need a refresher, since it's been awhile! The most recent part was on Patreon, but I've made it public so no one's missing context.

It’s probably sad that the most alone Robbie’s ever felt is right now. Not when he was newly single and suddenly homeless in a foreign country, and the only silver lining was Matty offering him somewhere to stay rent-free. It took months before Matty would let Robbie pay any rent, because he knew Robbie hadn’t saved up anything — hadn’t had to, when Georgie had been paying for all their living expenses, and Robbie was just working at the coffee shop so he didn’t feel like he was sponging off him.

But no, the most alone is right now, still living in the same place as Matty, not that it’s been easy to tell, lately. If Robbie had thought Matty had been avoiding him before he put up the sign, well — he was, but it’s nothing on how hard he’s avoiding Robbie now. Robbie had thought Matty might be mad, but ‘fuck you, Bardi’ with a laugh mad. Maybe even ‘grow up, Bardi’ without a laugh, but that was really the worst case scenario.

At least, Robbie thought it was the worst case scenario. Turns out the worst case scenario is legitimately hurting Matty's feelings.

And sure, Robbie knew Matty was a bit touchy about the trouble he has finding a girlfriend — can’t even blame him for it. It doesn’t make any sense, because Matty’s kind and generous and a gentleman. Also tall as fuck, and apparently chicks dig that. Robbie’s not dissing them or anything — he also digs that — but for some reason none of it seems to do Matty any favors.

It wouldn’t be surprising if everyone assumed a guy that great couldn’t possibly be single, right? Fuck knows Robbie was surprised, the first time he heard that. And if that’s the problem, then a sign letting all the ladies know he’s available was the best possible thing Robbie could do for the guy, but you tell that to Matty’s firmly closed bedroom door.

And that’s when they’re even in the same place, because Matty is doing a truly incredible job avoiding him. When he’s home, his door’s shut, and Robbie’s not ‘barge into someone’s room’ level rude, at least not when they're already mad at him, and when he’s never sure what shift Matty worked, whether he’s hiding from Robbie or just getting some desperately needed sleep.

It’s not like Robbie can talk to him about it at work, either. Matty schedules Robbie's shifts, and shocker, none of those shifts overlap with his right now. Robbie should just consider himself lucky Matty is too good a guy to cut his hours because he’s mad. Well, that might hurt Robbie's ability to pay his portion of the rent, but he could definitely stick Robbie with the shit shifts. He hasn’t, though. If anything, he’s taking all the shit shifts himself just to avoid working with Robbie.

And sure, it’s not like Robbie doesn’t know where Matty is, couldn’t just waltz right in, pretend he forgot something, or lost something, or had a sudden irresistible craving for an Italian soda, but if Matty wants space, Robbie should respect that, right? Never mind that Matty would see right through his excuse, and just duck back into the manager's office until Robbie left.

It doesn’t help the whole loneliness thing that Robbie can’t complain about any of it to their co-workers, since they’ll all take Matty’s side. Which is honestly what Matty deserves. If Robbie wasn’t in the situation himself, he’d be on Matty’s side too. Frankly, he is on Matty’s side. Robbie’s side right now isn’t so much an actual side as hoping someone will tell him how to make Matty happy again. Whatever it is, he’ll do it. Matty talking to him again would be a bonus too, but, you know, it’s not about Robbie.

“For someone who keeps saying it’s not about you, you sure are talking about yourself a lot,” Sebastien says.

Robbie really didn’t think he’d ever see him again, between being Georgie’s teammate, and in love with his best friend, but since all his co-workers are out, and Francis is now out, and Matty is obviously very much out, Robbie needs somebody to talk to. Even if he’s rude. And French.

He’s offered to pay too, and who really knows how long Robbie’s still going to have a job or a home? Matty would never fire him over something personal, and he probably wouldn’t kick him out either, but that doesn’t mean Robbie should keep making them both miserable by sticking around.

“Have you tried apologizing?” Sebastien asks. “Or have you gone right past that to finding a new job and a new home?”

“Of course I’ve apologized!” Robbie says. “I say it through the door, and I spelled it out in fridge magnets, and—“

“Have you apologized to his face, though?” Sebastien asks.

“That would require Matty being willing to be in the same room as me,” Robbie says, taking a grumpy bite of burger. It's hard to stay grumpy while he chews, though. This burger is the best thing he's eaten in weeks. Seb has good taste in restaurants. It being free doesn't hurt at.

“This still seems like an excessive reaction from him, if all you did was use the same sign your coworkers used for you,” Seb says. "Are you sure you didn't do something else too?"

“I told you,” Robbie says. “Matty's sensitive.”

“Uh huh,” Seb says skeptically, then “hey!”, when Robbie steals a sweet potato fry for his lack of belief. What does he know? Nothing. He doesn’t know Matty. And Robbie shouldn’t exactly be taking advice from someone who was out dating while actively pining over his best friend.

The fries have suddenly become a lump in his throat. Some people might call it karma, but Robbie’s pretty sure it’s just a bolt of realization at the worst possible time.

Robbie swallows slowly. It hurts. That part's probably karma.

“So, uh,” Robbie says. “How’d you know? That you were, you know. How’d you know you were in love with Simon?”

“Simon,” Seb says, which is what Robbie said, but Frencher.

“Simon,” Robbie says.

“That’s not better,” Seb sighs, then says, “Have you ever had an experience when every past moment hits you, all at once, and suddenly you see they make a picture?”

“Um, yeah,” Robbie says, looking down at his plate. He’s still hungry, but he’s kind of afraid to take a bite, just in case he gets struck by another bolt and ends up choking on it. “Yeah, I think I know exactly what you mean."

#fic snippet #robbie lombardi #elliott matthews

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emeraldsummers · 16 hours

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Fic: More Than An Ally?

Fandom: 9-1-1

Characters: Evan "Buck" Buckley, Hen Wilson, Chimney Han, Maddie Buckley, Christopher Diaz, Tommy Kinard

Pairing: Buck/Tommy (not the focus, it's more about Buck)

Summary:

Buck keeps referring to himself as an ally, mostly by accident, but also because he's not sure he's ready to say what he really is.

(Or, five times Buck calls himself an ally, and one time he doesn't.)

Buck couldn’t stop grinning.

Eyes scanning out across the room, he took in the sight surrounding him. Maddie and Chim, giggling together like they were teenagers, Christopher looking so damn grown up in his suit, Eddie sitting beside him nearly glowing with pride, Hen and Karen’s new daughter beaming at being able to show off her family, Tommy standing beside the buffet table, fully engrossed in conversation with an old teammate, wearing the hell out of his dress uniform in a way that made Buck feel like the luckiest guy in the room.

He played with the medal hanging around his neck. A medal he had earned for saving lives, for doing the right thing, for being a hero.

Yeah, today was a good day.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hen approaching him, and he turned to greet her.

“Hey! This is great, isn’t it?”

“Hmm? Yeah, this is fun,” she seemed distracted, looking over Buck’s shoulder as she spoke. “I haven’t gotten a chance to try dessert yet, have you?”

“Yeah, the chocolate mousse is…” he trailed off. “Is everything okay?”

She shook her head at that, and when she looked back at Buck she seemed less unsettled. “Sorry, yeah, everything is good.” At the pointed look he gave her, she admitted, “I’m just trying to avoid talking to Captain Gerrard.”

“Ah,” Buck responded. That made sense.

“You meet him?”

“Briefly,” Buck said. “But mostly I’ve heard the stories.” It had only taken five seconds of listening to Gerrard talk for him to realize the stories probably got worse than the ones he had heard.

“It’s not like I’m scared of him,” she hastily clarified. “I can handle him and any guys like him. It’s just… today is a really nice day. And I don’t need to blemish today with whatever garbage comes out of his mouth.”

And Buck understood that. “Makes sense. He doesn’t deserve even a second of your time. Just stick with me, and if he comes near, we’ll make a run for it.” He gave her a small wink, causing her to laugh.

“Thanks, Buck.” And she sounded like she meant it. Seemed like Buck wasn’t the only one getting sentimental today.

“I know things haven't always been this way. I know that under Gerrard your team didn't have your back. I just want you to always know that now, everyone at this station, we’re all allies here,” he said sincerely.

Hen made a face before letting out a short laugh. “Allies, Buck? Really? You?”

And, huh. Buck hadn’t realized he had said, so he quickly corrected, “I meant I’d be your ally. Which I am.”

It sounded like a weak explanation, even to him, but Hen gave him an odd, almost knowing look before saying, “Well, I'll say the same for you. I'm your ally, and everyone else at this station? They're here for you too. They're actually allies, Buck.”

Buck laughed at that, but the emotions of the day were starting to catch up with him and her words were hitting him hard. “I know, Hen. I'm really lucky I was assigned the 118 and I'm lucky it was under Bobby.”

“We both are,” she gave him a nudge before apparently deciding to lift the mood to something lighter. “Anyways,” she said with a grin, “There's definitely one benefit to Gerrard being from the dinosaur’s club.”

At Buck’s quizzical grin, she answered “We’d definitely be able to outrun him.”

II.

The apartment fire ended up being much smaller than originally anticipated, so by the time the 118, the third station to be dispatched, had arrived on the scene, the only job left to do was check the surrounding units to ensure they were still structurally sound. Buck and Chimney were heading up to the fifth floor, enjoying the easy call with casual conversation as they climbed.

“Tommy said he’s got a surprise for our date tonight, but I bet it involves the chopper,” Buck said with a smile. “He’s been hinting at it.”

Chimney gave a quick laugh. “Can’t say I’m jealous. I prefer my dates on the ground. At home.”

“Yeah, well,” Buck said with a sly grin, “The adrenaline is like nothing else, trust me. He took me up a few weeks back, and let me just say…”

“Yeah, yeah,” Chimney cut in. “I get it. Don’t need to imagine it.”

“Fine, fine,” Buck sighed. “I’m just saying, I’m excited for this shift to be over.”

After knocking on the last few doors of the fifth floor, the building was clear and it was time to pack up and head back to the station. The lobby of the apartment building was much busier than the stairwell had been, with members of the 273 and 142 packing up their stuff and doing final check-ins with the affected residents.

“You know,” Chim said. “What you mentioned earlier doesn’t surprise me. Tommy always had a thing for flying, even back in the day. He was obsessed with Top Gun.”

Buck laughed at that. When Tommy had found out Buck hadn’t seen it, he’d made sure to watch it for their next movie night, only for them to miss most of it due to getting a bit wound up and therefore distracted. Since it was important to Tommy that Buck actually watched it, they’d tried it again for their next movie night, that time with more success.

“He’s still obsessed, trust me,” Buck replied. Then, with another, louder laugh, “I’m surprised you weren’t able to clock him earlier.” At Chim’s confused expression, Buck continued, “Obsession with Top Gun? That’s like, the gayest thing I’ve ever heard.”

He didn’t realize how loud his voice had grown until the firefighter passing by him stopped dead in his tracks, like he wasn’t sure he heard what he just heard. He was from the 142 and very young, probably still a probie based on the nervous way he was carrying himself. He looked at Buck with his mouth open like he was going to say something, before deciding not to and continuing to walk past, shaking his head.

It took Buck a second before he realized what had just happened. What the probie was probably thinking.

Shit.

“Hey!” Buck called as he followed the probie through the crowd of people. “That came out wrong! I’m not - I’m not homophobic. I’m an ally, okay? Didn’t mean anything by it. I swear!”

The probie was determinedly not turning around to hear Buck out, but Chimney was following him at his side.

“Buck,” he said carefully. Buck knew that tone, knew it meant he was missing something stupidly obvious. He looked at Chimney waiting, but Chim just looked at him incredulously. “You’re dating a man.”

And, oh. Well, duh, Buck thought.

Buck turned back to where the probie had been walking, practically yelling, “Hey! I have a boyfriend! Not homophobic!”

But the probie was gone, slipped completely out of sight, and Buck had no idea if he’d heard him or not. The rest of the 142 definitely did hear him though, based on the way they were glancing at him awkwardly.

Chim patted him on the shoulder with a sigh before walking back to their own truck, leaving Buck to mumble a quick “Just a misunderstanding” before hurrying after him.

III.

Buck was always grateful for dinners with Eddie and Christopher at the Diaz household. Tonight, Eddie was insisting on cooking, much to Christopher’s chagrin, but even though Buck loved cooking for them, he was grateful for the opportunity to sit at the table and hang out with Chris.

Technically, he was supposed to be making sure Chris got his homework done, but Buck preferred to be a bad influence and instead talk about Chris’ day.

“Today, in social studies, we were talking about different kinds of families,” Chris shared.

“Oh yeah? What’s that mean?” Hanging out with Chris, he was always amazed at how different school was now from his own childhood.

“You know, how most people have a mom and a dad. But some people have step-parents. Or guardians. Or two dads. Stuff like that.”

“Oh,” Buck replied. That definitely wasn’t talked about when he was Chris’ age.

“Some people in my class were confused,” Chris continued, “But I already knew that. It’s obvious. Denny has two moms. Harry has a mom and a dad and two step-dads. I have Dad and Carla and you.”

And it was the fact that Chris said that last part so casually, like it was the simplest, most obvious thing in the world that Buck was a part of his family that left Buck speechless.

But Chris continued like he hadn’t just made Buck’s whole year. “Some people in my class had never even heard of people that are L-G-B-T-Q-I-A.” He spelled out the acronym slowly, like he wanted to make sure he said it right.

Buck hummed, trying to think of what to say. He wasn’t sure he was prepared to explain homophobia to a 13-year old, and he wanted to be careful with his words.

But Chris ended up asking something different.

“What does the A stand for?”

Buck let out a relieved sigh. “It uh, it stands for ‘asexual’ or ‘aromantic’. It means someone who doesn’t experience any attraction, or experiences it less than non-ace people.” Buck cringed a bit at himself, fully aware his explanation was lacking, but he wasn’t sure if Chris understood the difference between romantic and sexual attraction yet. “Sometimes, in some contexts, the A stands for ‘ally’”.

“What’s an ally?” Chris asked.

“An ally is someone who… it’s like me and your dad. Someone who isn’t L, G, B, T, or Q, but supports the community and wants to fight for their rights.”

Chris made a face, turning to stare at Buck quizzically. After a beat of silence, Chris finally spoke.

“Buck. You can’t be an ally. You’re with Tommy so you’ve gotta be the G or the B or the Q, right?” And again, he was able to say it like it was the most simple, obvious fact in the world.

Buck let out a nervous laugh that quickly became a genuine one. He had honestly forgotten for a moment, but of course Chris hadn’t.

“You’re right. Your dad’s the ally. I’m… one of those”. Chris didn’t seem to notice him trailing off, and before the conversation could continue, Eddie announced that dinner was served.

“No matter what he made, Chris, make sure you tell him it’s the best dinner ever.”

Christopher groaned, and Buck made his way to the table, eager to enjoy a meal with his family.

IV.

Maddie apologized as she excused herself for Jee-Yun’s night routine, but truthfully this was one of Buck’s favorite parts of visiting his sister after work.

Getting to be there while she went through the peaceful normality of every day routine with her daughter, it filled Buck with such a distinct sense of contentment. He sat in the kitchen, idly playing with his phone, but mostly listening to the domestic sounds around him. The apartment was small enough that he could hear Jee’s shrieks and giggles from the bathtub, hear Maddie negotiating her out of the tub with the promise of her choice of book tonight, and hear Jee trying to start playtime again as Maddie dressed her for bed.

When the apartment finally got quieter, only the low hum of Maddie’s voice audible, Buck quietly stood up and walked closer to Jee’s bedroom. From the hallway near the door, Buck was able to hear Maddie reading the book, a simple story about a princess on her quest to save her kingdom. He closed his eyes, and for a moment he was taken back to his childhood bedroom, to Maddie curled up next to him reading a comedic retelling of Little Red Riding Hood, to her rolling her eyes when he begged her to do the silly voices, to her agreeing just to hear Buck laugh…

Jee-Yun was a lucky girl. She really did have the best mom.

When he could tell the story was winding to a close, he silently made his way back to his spot in the kitchen, not wanting to seem like he was intruding.

A few minutes later, he could hear Maddie making her way back. “Sorry about that,” she said softly. “Bedtime without Daddy always means it takes more time to get her settled.”

“Hey, don’t even worry about it. Wasn’t long at all.” Then after a beat, “When’s Chimney getting home anyways?”

She shrugged. “Probably late. He hasn’t seen Albert in ages, and he hasn’t had a guys night out in even longer.”

He turned to see her carrying a beer in each hand as she made her way over to the table.

“Thanks,” he said as she handed it to him.

She smiled. “I’m never going to complain about getting one-on-one time with my brother.”

Buck laughed before sipping his beer, a thought from earlier coming back to the forefront of his mind.

“Hey, that story you were telling Jee. I noticed it ended with the princess falling in love with another princess…” he trailed off, trying to sound nonchalant, like that detail hadn’t immediately stuck out at him as he was listening.

“You caught that, huh?” She gave him a pensive look before apparently deciding to let it go. “We have books where the princess falls in love with the prince, we have books where the princess falls in love with another princess. We have a book where the princess becomes the prince. We just… we want Jee to know that these are all possibilities for her. That all of these possibilities have happy endings.”

“That’s… nice.” Buck was trying to piece his words together. “It’s like, she won’t have to learn what being gay is, or that it’s okay, she’ll just always know. And if she is queer in some way, it would be way less confusing for her when she figures it out. Huh.”

“Exactly,” Maddie responded, reaching out to take his hands across the table. “Buck, I’m sorry I never gave that to you growing up. I’m sorry if it ever made you feel confused, or if you were ever scared to tell me things growing up. I should have made sure you knew I would have loved you no matter what.”

“What? Maddie -” That wasn’t what he was trying to say. “I always knew you loved me. That’s not it. Any of the confusion, it wasn’t your fault. It was a different time, books like that didn’t even exist.”

“I know, but still -”

“What I was trying to say,” he cut in, “was that it didn’t even occur to me that I should be talking to Jee about stuff like this. What if I've subconsciously been teaching her all of these outdated norms and ideas? As an ally, I should have already been thinking of this!”

“Whoa, whoa,” Maddie released his hands to hold them out in front of her for a moment, before bringing them back down onto the table. “First of all, she’s three. So no, you haven’t permanently instilled homophobia in her by accident.” Buck rolled his eyes at her oversimplification of what he was trying to say. “Secondly, ‘as an ally’? You’re still going with that?”

“I-” Buck hadn’t even realized he had said that, let alone that that would be what Maddie caught from his rambling. “I don’t know, I guess not. It doesn’t matter, does it? You knew what I meant.”

“I mean, it matters a little bit, doesn’t it?” She softened her voice. “If I’m pushing too much, just tell me and I’ll back off. But we haven’t really talked about this.”

And Buck knew that was true. He knew his declarations were about dating Tommy, knew he never really wanted to actually talk about himself, never really let anyone know how much self-discovery he was working on. “Yeah, that’s fair.”

“Because,” and she lowered her voice almost to a whisper, talking to Buck like she was scared he would bolt. “You’re bi, right? Or pan?”

“I guess,” Buck said with a breath. “Why do I have to call myself anything?”

“You don’t,” she said quickly, “I’m sorry if I pushed. Really, it's none of my business. Especially as a straight person. But calling yourself an ally probably isn’t the move, right?” She gave him the kind of knowing, sly smile that only a sibling could.

And just like that, the mood was already lightened. Buck let out a relieved laugh. “Yeah, it’s uh, becoming something of a bad habit.” He took another sip of his beer. “But thanks, by the way. No one else is going to push me, and I think I might need it.”

“Hey, it’s what allies and sisters are for.”

Buck was antsy as he sat in the back of the firetruck. His shift was scheduled to be over two hours ago, but the drunk driver that caused a ten-car pileup on the highway had made sure he would be late, and Buck was eager to get back to the station so that he could head to Tommy’s.

They were supposed to be attending a comedy show for date night, but Buck had texted a couple hours ago that he was unfortunately going to be very late, and to see if they could get a refund on the tickets. Tommy texted back not to worry, he understood how these things went, and that he’d be waiting at home with a bottle of wine

God, how did Buck ever get so lucky?

Once finally back at the station, Buck didn’t even bother to shower or even change out his uniform, instead grabbing his bag from his locker and practically sprinting to his Jeep, laser-focused on the shower he would have at Tommy’s and the person who would be joining him in it.

He forced himself not to break traffic laws to get himself there faster, and when he finally knocked on Tommy’s door he was nearly breathless with excitement. As he heard the door unlock, he forced his face into a more casual expression as the door opened. That expression was promptly abandoned when he saw Tommy smiling in front of him, and he matched the smile tenfold as Tommy took his hand and welcomed him inside.

Closing the door behind him, Buck took Tommy’s face in his hands and crowded him against the wall, pressing their lips together with a soft hum. “Rushed right over,” he whispered against his mouth.

Tommy broke apart for a moment, hand reaching up to play with the collar of Buck’s uniform. “I can tell,” he said with a sly smile.

For a moment Buck stilled, once again worried he would come across as over-eager, but then Tommy kissed him deeper, his hands dipping to hold his waist tightly, and Buck was again reminded how well Tommy responded to the eagerness.

They broke apart after a moment, and Buck could see Tommy’s eyes travel from his eyes downward, landing on a spot on Buck’s shirt.

“I like the pin,” Tommy said with a small laugh.

Mind still focused on the weight of Tommy’s body against his own, it took Buck a moment to realize what Tommy was referring to.

He was staring at the small Progress Pride Flag pinned to his shirtpocket.

“Oh!” Buck laughed. “The station got these, since it’s Pride month. I know it’s a little hokey, but I wanted to make sure everyone we help knows that they’re safe with us. That they’re safe with me. That I’m an ally.”

“Evan,” Tommy deadpanned, his body stiffening.

Buck blanked for a moment before realizing what he had said. “Shit, yeah. Um, you know what I mean.”

“I mean, I do and I don’t,” Tommy responded. He didn’t sound annoyed, so at least there was that. “I didn’t realize you were still calling yourself an ally.”

Buck pulled away, suddenly feeling exposed. He turned towards the bathroom, hoping a shower would put this conversation on pause until it could be forgotten.

But no, he didn’t really want to run from this. Not with Tommy. He turned back around. “No, I don’t… not really. I know I’m not, I know I’m not straight. I know that. I don’t know why it feels so weird to say what I actually am.”

“It’s still new,” Tommy reasoned.

“Exactly! And I’ve called myself an ally for so long, in my head that’s still where I’m categorized. Even though I know… I know the definitions. I think I know which one fits, it just doesn’t feel like… mine yet.” Tommy was studying him, and suddenly Buck worried this crisis was going to put him off. Tommy had been out for years at this point. He had no problem calling himself gay and seeing himself as part of the community. Buck knew this problem was immature, a sign that he was still so new to all of this, something most people figured out in their teens or twenties.

But instead, Tommy walked closer to him and took his hands. “Whatever label you’re thinking of, it’s yours if you want it. You’re a part of this community, Evan, no one can take that away from you.” He moved one of his hands to Buck’s face, cupping his cheek. “But if the labels feel stifling, you don’t need to pick one. Lots of people don’t use them. It doesn’t matter to me, just as long as you know that this is real.”

And God, somehow Tommy always knew how to reassure him. The spiral that he had been about to send himself on started to unwind, and Buck remembered why he was so excited to get over here. He closed the distance between them, capturing Tommy in a deep kiss, and his anxieties became lost to the moment, because oh, did he know how real this was.

Buck was nervous. He’d only attended Pride once before, back in 2019 when the 118 was selected to participate in the parade, and so his experience was limited to standing in the bed of the truck, wearing his uniform and a rainbow feather boa and waving at the passing crowds. Every other year, he volunteered to work so that the queer staff members could attend the festivities, like an ally should.

This year, however, he was attending for real.

As it turned out, Pride was a lot more than just the parade. There were street fairs, art markets, concerts, movie screenings, and so, so many parties. Tommy would be Buck’s guide through the crazy, and so they were enjoying the afternoon heat by walking through the block party, browsing through the many vendors.

Walking hand-in-hand with Tommy, Buck’s attention was drawn not to the vendors, but to the crowds of people around them. Buck was struck by the sheer number of vibrant personalities surrounding them, a wave of contentment washing over him. Los Angeles was a pretty liberal city, but he realized this was the first time in his life he’d seen this much open queer affection in his entire life. In the daytime, no less. It was so affirming that he almost became overwhelmed, but instead he squeezed Tommy’s hand, basking in the fact that he felt so comfortable doing that.

The next booth they approached caught Buck’s eye. It was a simple booth, stocked only with dozens of rolls of stickers. The person behind the counter, young and welcoming, smiled as they walked up.

“Hey,” they greeted. “Stickers are pay-anything, with the proceeds going towards homeless queer youth.” They gestured at the donation box on the counter.

“Sure, why not?” Tommy said, reaching into his wallet and grabbing two five dollar bills. “Pick which one you like, on me,” he winked.

Buck studied the options in front of him, realizing the booth was offering every queer-adjacent sticker that could ever exist.

There were the identity labels, ranging from ones he was familiar with to ones he would need to Google later. There were pronoun stickers. Flag stickers, many of which he didn’t recognize. Stickers announcing relationship status. Stickers with puns and references to queer media. Stickers that were downright dirty or announcing preferred sex acts. Stickers that Buck was pretty sure related to niche fetishes but was too nervous to ask about. And many more with generic Pride-related sayings and images.

Buck was pretty sure that every single person that walked up to this booth would be able to pick out at least one sticker that applied to them, if not many more.

Buck took his time looking at his options, but truthfully he knew which one had caught his eye. He’d known as soon as he saw what this booth was offering. He considered making a joke and picking the ‘Ally’ sticker, but he knew the joke would only feel funny for a moment before it felt stale and he felt uncomfortable wearing it. He considered picking a random rainbow, not technically a lie but still feeling like a cop-out, before hastily pointing to his choice before he could change his mind.

The volunteer cut the sticker and handed it to Buck, who studied it for a moment before peeling it off and sticking it onto his shirt, on the right side of his chest.

Buck took a deep breath and turned back to Tommy, eyeing the “PROUD AS FUCK” sticker newly adorning his tank top, and saw Tommy’s eyes move to read Buck’s sticker.

“I like it,” Tommy said simply.

Buck glanced down at the sticker, its pink, purple, and blue background with “BISEXUAL” written in white letters. “I like it too. Bisexual.” The word came out without hesitation, without deflecting or even stuttering on it. “Feels like me.”

And Buck took Tommy’s hand, pulled him back to continue walking down the street, and Buck kissed him right there in the crowd under the sun, truly knowing what it meant to feel free.

#911 #911 abc #bucktommy #911 fic #evan buck buckley #evan buckley #tommy kinard #bucktommy fic #tevan #tevan fic #fic #myfic #911 fics #911 fandom

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where-dreams-dwell · 2 days

Text

There are so many missed opportunities in Part 1 of Bridgerton Season 3 its frustrating to behold.

As one half of the season is out it’s possible that some of these will be fixed in the second half however having to wait until then (not just in terms of release date but also narratively) is not good planning. Having to wait for Part 2 to have most of the interesting things happen with our supposed 'main characters' makes the structure of the season feel unbalanced, and annoys the audience trying to root for the main couple. And a lack of attention to our romantic leads leaves the audience feeling uninvested and unconvinced in their love.

Spoilers below.

....................................................................

1. No flashbacks: by the end of Episode 4 in S1 we knew all of Simons backstory, why he didn’t want children or marriage, and his key character motivations. This helped us understand why Antony was so against the match (he knew of Simon’s vow), why Simon duelling him instead of agreeing to marry Daphne was actually a sign of love, and helped the audience understand his struggle to accept love. Similarly by Ep 4 of S2 we have had Anthony’s tragic past with his father revealed, explaining his fear of love impacting on those around him and explaining why he is fighting the clear feelings he has for Kate. For both of these romantic leads we (the audience) now know why they are refusing their clear and obvious feelings for the heroine, what internal struggles they are going to need to overcome this season, and by proxy have been reassured that they must truly love the heroine otherwise they wouldn’t be tormented.

This explanation and fleshing out of key character-beats reveals the internal motivations which are governing these characters; this knowledge is essential for future scenes where their actions will appear dismissive or unloving and the audience needs to know that they are operating under their own internal world view in which those actions make perfect sense.

Simon rejecting Daphne's hand? He’s not being cruel, he doesn’t want to deprive her of children as he has foresworn having them. Anthony rejecting his feelings for Kate and continuing to pursue her sister? He’s not unfeeling, he’s actually feeling too much and trying to run from it. This knowledge helps us forgive actions that could make us doubt their ‘true feelings’ and is essential to the audience rooting for the couple. When the romantic lead is being an ass it helps for us to know what may be making them act that way.

No Colin flashbacks means we have no idea what motivates him, what his internal journey for this season is, or any reassurance that his love to Penelope is true. What might have been motivating Colin to act like an ass, not just to Penelope but to other people, and what m ight be be grappling with now which is impacting him either realizing his feelings or coming to terms with them? We have no idea, so his journey to love is a little less compelling.

2. Colin didn’t get humbled: through season 1 + 2 we’ve seen Penelope pine after Colin while he bumbles happily along seeing her as a cherished friend but ignoring her for other romantic options. We finished season 2 with a Colin deeply hurting Penelope and implying to the audience that he actually doesn’t respect her even as a friend - what friend would imply their fiend is unattractive or unmarriable to others, especially in that time and society?

As the audience has been following this one sided romance from Penelope’s perspective we’re predisposed to be on ‘her side’, hence wanting Colon to be humbled and have to properly apologise. We want to see Colin chasing Penelope (in a role reversal from the previous two seasons) and be made to eat his own worlds.

Instead we get one scene of Penelope revealing her hurt over Colin’s actions, and then their next scene together Colin is all but forgiven. He apologises but immediately move the conversation on, asking to atone for his actions by offering help and then bam! For all intents and purposes it’s business as usual between the two again. Penelope is happy to chat and banter with him, smile at him lovingly, and agree to a secret (and scandalous) partnership.

Whats even more concerning is that they’ve set up Colin to property hate Lady Whistledown so when Penelope reveals herself she may even have to humble herself before Colin for his forgiveness. Having started the season (with two years to dwell on Colin’s actions) wanting Colin to have to beg Penelope for forgiveness, it feels disappointing that not only do we not get that but we may get significantly more scenes of her begging for his.

3. Penelope and Colin together: this may be more personal preference but I’m not feeling the same for this couple as I did for Daphne+Simon or Kate+Anthony, or even Charlotte+George. Some of it is line delivery (Anthony felt like Brooding Fuckboy, or Fuckboy who’s fighting their inner demons, whereas Colin just feels sleezy), some of it is script (Colin hasn’t been given nearly as much dialogue and little of it is noteworthy), and some is just preference in that this lead doesn’t feel mysterious or challenging or interesting. He’s really just there.

Simon and Daphne, Kate and Anthony, Charlotte and George they all had this tension when they were on screen together that you could feel through the screen. Maybe it’s the lack of anger or hatred or antagonism between the two of them and due to them being a friends to lovers storyline but the tension just doesn’t feel like it’s there.

4. Time with the main couple: It doesn't feel like the 'main couple' this season has had as much time or scenes to help us understand why they are meant to be together.

This is an ensemble show and as season continue and characters develop or are added this will become a bigger issue; there are more named characters and players than S1 to juggle, plus some characters need time this season to set themselves up for future plot lines.

But Season 1 felt like Daphne and Simons season. Season two felt like Kate and Anthony's season. This doesn't feel like Colin and Penelope's season. Its more like this is a drama-filled season, and one aspect of it is Colin and Penelope.

5. Colin's Character: This is actually a much bigger problem so lets break it down further

5.1 Why Colin? In a friends to lovers plot (a childhood friends to lovers plot too) we really need to see why our heroine is fixated on this man; why is he better than all her other options, why did she originally fall and then remain in love with them for all these years, and why should we want him to realise his own feelings? Crucially what is so special about him?

As Colin hasn't yet been fleshed out, really at all, we don't know why he is this great love for Penelope and why we should root for him to fall in love with her in turn. So Penelope's pining for him comes across as less understandable and more 'I don't get what you see in him but okay'. And that's bad, especially for a show which wants you to go feral over their central couple; fewer members of the audience falling in love with the lead means fewer people understanding Penelope maintaining this crush (especially when its detrimental to her future) which means fewer people rooting for the main couple.

5.2 Colin’s character dissonance: this is kind of a show don’t tell issue but we keep being told all these things about Colin’s character, instead of seeing examples of this behavior ourselves, and on top of that what we are told doesn’t match with what we are shown.

Violet tells Colin he’s ’always putting others first’ but we have never seen this in 2 1/2 seasons of this show. Colin has left to travel in every off season, a very self centred action focused solely on what he wants to do and not what others may want. We’ve seen Benedict put people first more than Colin (being the shoulder for Eloise, helping her out in ballrooms, being Anthony’s second for his duel and his sounding board with Sharma issues) so that character assessment feels untrue.

Violet also calls Colin her ‘most sensitive child’ but we have not one scene of Colin showing this sensitive side. There’s no scene of him comforting Daphne about her failed season or Anthony about his problem with the Sharmas; no moment showing him helping out anyone outlet out of the kindness of his heart, or reacting to another’s pain or worry or problems so again this feels like Violet is describing a totally different character.

Penelope says Colin’s eyes are more beautiful ‘when you’re being kind’ but we haven’t seen Colin be overly kind to anyone. He told Marina in S1 he would have still married her if she had told him of her pregnancy, but this is stated when he’s angry so he’s probably not feeling or looking very kind right then, and it isn’t him actually doing this action, it’s just him claiming what he would have done. When he’s goes to visit Marina in S2 his actions come off more desperate and clingy than anything close to kind. If you argue that his tutoring if Penelope is kind, it’s actually self serving as he offered to do this to atone for him being decidedly not kind at the end of last season. He’s helping her out but he offered this to make up for hurting her before so I don’t think you can view this as a selfless act.

When he reveals Jacks scheme in S2 and demands he pay back money while preserving the Featherington Ladies good name he is undoubtably doing a good act but ‘kind’ isn’t the way he’s portrayed: he’s shown as decisive, protective, angry, courageous, bold, etc.. all very good things but still not that ‘kind’ Penelope talks about.

The last time Colin did something entirely kind may have been Season 1 asking Penelope to dance after Cressida ruined her dress. If that's it, that's very little to go on and a very long time ago.

It feels like people are trying to tell us that Colin is a good guy, without showing us moments where he actually is good. It comes off as clunky and doesn’t match the character we have seen, so these claims have little impact on our assessment of him as a person and as a lead.

5.3 Colins Writing; Stop trying to make Colin's Great Writing happen. Its not going to happen.

At least not when the only snippet you give us is basically porn.

I haven't read the books but I've heard that Colins writing snippet that Penelope finds, while starting as porn, eventually turns into a rumination on how unfulfilled and alone these actions make Colin feel and how he feels lost. That would have been an amazing moment to have in the show, giving us honesty and a secret from the romantic lead and adding depth to Colins actions (which are a little jarring to watch while we actively want him to be falling for Penelope).

If Colin is this great writer then have him writing more. In the back of conversations at breakfast, have him reading his travel journals or scribbling in a notebook. In the hot air balloon scene have Colin seek out an adventure novelist to talk about his experiences. Maybe he gets a letter from Sir Phillip asking about his travels since they enjoyed speaking so much last season, and Colin sends long and detailed responses people joke are like novels (also great for future seasons).

Right now it feels like window dressing and a throw away comment that he's 'an incredibly talented writer' and doesn't match what we've seen of him.

(Side note: it is objectively hilarious that Penelope reads one page of smut about a naked woman the author is sleeping with, then later describes this page of writing as 'incredible' while claiming she 'would love to read more'. You sure you're 100% interested in Colin there Penelope...?)

5.4 How is Colin a Tragic Hero?: This figure always works best for romatic stories and all other Bridgerton Seasons have followed the formula. Simon had a negligent and abusive father and no good examples of marriage or family, Anthony had traumatically had his beloved father die in front of him and been parentified at a young age, and George had the weight of the crown destroying his mental health. All of these leads had a demon they were wrestling with and it gave them intrigue and interest.

Colin has no demons; at least none we've been made aware of.

There's a vague allusion (from Eloise, Lady Whistedown and Violet) that Colin is in some way 'putting on a front' this season. What would have been amazing for the audience would have been a scene or two showing Colin struggling to fit in (in his family, in the Ton, etc) and him feeling alone or isolated because of it. Maybe traveling was his attempt to have interesting stories to tell, or something to distinguish himself with but upon his return (Season 2) no one had an interest in listening and groaned when he tried to share his stories, and so he turned to writing them down instead and decided to shut himself off from trying to relate to everyone as 'himself' and instead to become 'The Traveler' character and pretend so he can fit in.

This would not only give Colin a Secret or a Demon that he needed to work through, but offer us (the audience) a way in which he would be able to understand and support Penelope; another person feeling isolated and unheard who turned to writing to express themself.

While there are the bones of a great love story here the little work put in to flesh out Colin as an individual, giving us no idea of what experiences made him and what he is currently grappling with, means the audience doesn't have much to go on when Penelope professes to love him. Who is this man, as descriptions of him don't match his actions and those actions he does have are both seemingly self serving (travel) and not fully fleshed out (writing); and both annoyingly happen largely off screen. And as the current structure pits Penelope as likely the one needing to beg forgiveness by the end of the season, while we entered it expecting Colin to begging for her forgiveness, their current relationship doesn't feel as salifying or as earned as we could have hoped.

Here's to Part 2 doing some very heavy lifting.

#bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton s3 #media analysis #spoilers #this has just become a rant about Colin #Petition to give Colin a real character and not a proxy one explained by others #where is the yearning?#penelope featherington #colin x penelope #colin bridgerton #develop him for the love of god #personal take

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amateurvoltaire · 19 hours

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In one of your last posts you mentioned you were studying the civil war in Vandée. Have you ever seen the rather new movie "Vaincre ou Mourir" on the topic? If yes, what do you think of it? I was very curious to give it a try, hoping it's not the usual demonisation of the revolutionary government. Not that I expect it to be portrayed positively in a movie focused on the Vendéean insurgents pov, of course...

Thanks a lot for your question! It’s the first one I've ever received, and I’m really excited to dive into it. (I might have gone a bit overboard, so grab a coffee or a drink before you tackle this beast… TLDR at the bottom…)

I watched "Vaincre ou Mourir" a couple of months ago. Before I dive into my thoughts, the man himself would like a word:

All jokes aside, have you ever been to one of those medieval theme parks where they offer a "realistic" medieval show with dinner? As a kid, every summer, my parents took me to a jousting show at an Italian theme park. We'd watch two knights fight each other for an hour while being “medieval” and munching on chicken legs without any cutlery.

That's pretty much how I felt watching this movie: it’s flashy and fun but doesn’t have much going on underneath. It makes more sense when you discover that the film was funded by Puy le Feu, a large historical theme park in Vendée.

The context

And this is the thing: despite the Canal+ distribution, most of the production is local. The Vendée itself is often defined as a memory space (1), which can lead to a community feeling a special connection to their past. This is often reflected in local traditions, commemorations, and even political leanings. I remember watching an interview from the bicentenary where some locals said they don’t celebrate the 14th of July as a matter of principle—200 years later!

It’s also worth noting that the Vendée has a history of conservative and right-leaning political preferences, and Canal+ is also a right-leaning media outlet.

The Experts

Is it a documentary? Is it a fictional film? It's hard to say in the first few minutes.

The movie attempts to project historical accuracy by introducing four experts right at the start. If a film opens with such a direct appeal to authority, I tend to scrutinise who these experts are. So, who are they?

Reynald Secher: a historian who has been a massive proponent of the Vandean genocide theory. He is very anti-Republican, and his research methodologies are rather sketchy…

Nicolas Delahaye: I don’t know much about him, but I see he publishes primarily regionally in a Vendean publishing house. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’s particularly biased, but it does mean his audience is very limited to people with specific views.

Anne Rolland-Boulestreau: a historian at the Université Catholique de l’Ouest specialising in the Vendée counter-revolution. Her articles in the Annales Historiques de la Révolution Française seem unbiased and well-researched. I own one of her books but haven't read it yet, so I can't speak to her longer-form content.

Armand Bernand: if you google de la Rochejaquelein, you will find this guy everywhere. He owns a publishing house, loves the Château de la Durbelière (2), and wrote a series of books set there. He clearly has a historical crush on M. Henri. I think he cosplayed him during some re-enactments and wrote a book about Henri’s brother Auguste.

It’s worth mentioning they either hail from Vendée or work exclusively within the region. This is my bias speaking because I’ve pretty much read all his work, but if you make a movie about the Vendee and can’t get Jean-Clément Martin to say something on camera about it, you should probably not feature any experts…

The Story

After an awkward three minutes of experts telling us how important the revolution was and introducing Charette, we get to the actual movie, which opens with a pile of bodies, burnings, a hanged person, and an awkward first-person voiceover of Charette saying that they made the Vendee into an inferno. This will be a theme for the next hour or so.

If I were to describe this film in two words, "tragedy porn" would fit. What occurred in Vendée was horrific, and its rightly violent portrayal should help viewers understand and appreciate the human and historical impact. However, the film often prioritises shock value over explaining the underlying reasons.

Charette is, by all accounts, a very compelling subject. The guy was a libertine with bucket-loads of courage and style who had a woman as an aide de camp in 1793! Despite spending 1.5 hours with him, narrated from his perspective, I would be hard-pressed to tell you what he’s actually fighting for. Is it honour? Is it revenge? Is it stubbornness? Your guess is as good as mine!

There is absolutely no character growth whatsoever. The film presents as a sequence of battles and shocking scenes narrated by a somewhat detached Charette. Remember what I said about the medieval show? This shock-value approach might work for a short performance during dinner but falls flat when stretched across an entire film.

Despite the weak script, the actors are quite good. Nothing Oscar-worthy, but they can act. The guy that plays Charette does a very good job and is quite charismatic.

The Historical Accuracy

On the whole, I can’t see glaring historical errors. It is fairly historically accurate with some minor issues. This is obviously not an exhaustive list, but there are things I noticed and jotted down:

The main one is the bizarre theory that Charette agreed to the peace of 1795 because he was promised that Louis XVII would be handed to him. This has absolutely no credible historical basis whatsoever. It’s a myth that has been propagated for over 200 years.

I’m pretty sure Charette didn’t sign the treaty of La Jaunaye. In fact, as far as I remember, no one from the insurgent side signed it.

While not a historical inaccuracy per se, it's a missed opportunity that the film often portrays Charette as the sole leader of the Vendean army. Though he mentions being one chief among many, this aspect is quickly glossed over. His historical relationship with the Catholic and Royal Army and its leaders was complex and would have been interesting to explore further. It's a shame the film likely didn't have the budget to delve into this, as it could have also demonstrated that Vendée wasn't a monolith.

The depiction of the republican army as well-equipped is somewhat exaggerated. If they were as well-appointed as shown, Carnot and Prieur (Cote D’or) would be out of a job, and Saint-Just wouldn't have needed to requisition shoes for the army.

Lastly, the film underexplains the context of why the counter-revolution started. In my opinion, it manipulatively emphasises the king's execution more than warranted, suggesting it triggered the popular uprising when it really did not. The conflict in Vendée began as a peasant revolt, where the local population was far more concerned with religious issues than royal politics. Most Vendean peasants likely couldn't name the king—they probably knew he was a Louis since there had been a Louis on the throne for 200 years, but that's about it. Their concerns were local: when parish priests who had taken the civic oath replaced their traditional priests, and the Levée en masse was decreed, forcing them to fight random Germans 600 km away for a regime threatening their way of life, they rebelled.

Is the movie anti-Republican propaganda?

To wrap up, is the film anti-Republican? Frankly, I don’t believe it is overtly so. It adopts a somewhat clichéd stance: the revolution's ideals were noble, but things eventually went too far. While I have plenty of thoughts on this—which I'll keep to myself for now—I wouldn’t say this perspective is inherently anti-Republican.

Charette is depicted as initially supportive of the revolution, which is accurate for many aristocrats, especially the minor nobility. The portrayal of Republican soldiers is balanced, with General Jean-Pierre Travot sometimes appearing more honourable than Charette. As the main character, Charette is shown as lazy, indecisive, and sometimes brutal, so the film does not attempt to heroise him. The princes, especially Artois, are also depicted negatively. So, the film isn’t overtly royalist.

Is there a specific stance against the Government (aka the CSP)? I don’t recall them being mentioned, which, again, is accurate since most Vendeeans, including the nobility, were not deeply involved in Parisian politics.

That being said, Carrier and Turreau are portrayed very negatively, and rightfully so. Republican generals are also shown as less likely to spare the "brigands" when captured, which aligns with historical accounts. The movie leans heavily on shock value, featuring hard-to-watch scenes of executions, guillotines, and drownings. Unfortunately, even the staunchest republican historians would be hard-pressed to find the evidence to call those scenes revisionists.

Beyond that, the only thing that stood out to me about the Republicans is that they made Kleber look about 60 years old.

In conclusion, is this the most accurate film ever? Certainly not. Is it counter-revolutionary propaganda? I genuinely don’t think so, and if someone claims otherwise, they’re likely being disingenuous.

TLDR:

Watched the movie "Vaincre ou Mourir," which felt like a medieval theme park show—entertaining but lacking depth, probably due to its funding by an actual historical theme park. Despite its attempt to appear historically accurate with expert interviews, the film fails to deeply explore its characters or the complexities of the Vendée region's history. While it doesn't contain major historical inaccuracies, it oversimplifies the causes and events of the Vendée uprising, focusing more on visual shock than factual explanation. Not outright anti-Republican or counter-revolutionary, but doesn't offer new insights into anything. Overall, flashy but not as informative as it could be.

Notes

A memory space is defined as a location (physical or otherwise) where memories, histories, and narratives are preserved, shared, and understood within a society or culture. Things like museums, monuments, rituals, stories and in this case a region can be memory spaces

Château de la Durbelière was the home of La Rochejaquelein

PS: Thank you again for your question! I had a lot of fun answering it.

#frev #french revolution #vendee war #vendee #charette #amateurvoltaire's essay ramblings #vaincre ou mourir #review

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