#whether his mental health issues are real or just excuses

[dk-ghostmachines]

I gotta talk about FourDogs (again)

It's barely about her, though. I think "he's so lucky his dad was brutally murdered" and "people with trauma need a second handicap because they're too motivated" are such absolute-the-fuck-ly bonkers takes, they're not even worth the time it took me to get mad about them, which was immediately. This time around, I have way more to say about audience reception. I'll try to keep it civil.

It feels like a lot of us are responding from increasingly personal places because these are characters with which a lot of us identify, or we see traits in them that remind us of people from our real lives. And hey! Another performance and storytelling slay on the part of one Brennan Lee Mulligan. Who else can invent 50+ characters every year and play them to the point where any one of them can evoke both an "omg that's literally me!" and an "omg that's literally Dani, the girl that bullied me all of freshmen year until I punched out her front tooth in the student parking lot and got in-school suspension for a month!". And whether Kipperlily reminds you of Dani, or reflects your own anxieties about potential, ability, and trauma, an important thing to remember is this: she is not real!

Brennan made her up! Brennan made her up to tell a story, and when he made her up, he made her annoying, petty, antagonistic, and he gave her not just opposing goals to the the protagonists we know and love, but the explicit goal of ruining The Bad Kids' lives, specifically.

Now, I'm not saying she's fictional to be a dick, or dismiss any deeper readings on her or any of the Rat Grinders. I'm bringing it up because the way I'm seeing people talk to each other about these characters is starting to get a little wild and it's in danger of waking up The Olde Gods™ (i.e. the special brand of Tumblr Self-Righteousness that lives inside us all).

It's important to remember Kipperlilly is a character in a fictive work so that different interpretations of her don't get treated as stone law. Each reading of her is personal and valid, but none are gospel. The "Kipperlilly is but a victim" take is not the only correct one, nor is radical empathy for her as a character the only correct reaction. Also, even if I consider her sympathetic that is not incompatible with an opinion like "Kipperlilly needs to get roundhouse'd in the head by a lesbian in a tracksuit and/or a wizard in a jean jacket, posthaste". Sure, you can say that anyone who doesn't feel a deep and eclipsing empathy for Kipperlilly above all other emotions is immature at best and sociopathic at worst, but then I can just say anyone who demands solely empathy for Kipperlilly and excuses her literal crimes and bass-ackwards world view because she's insecure and has anger issues, is probably also someone who has a history of weaponizing whatever minority status they may or may not occupy to talk over, silence, or harass people of color.

They're both just opinions. And also, like. Y'know. A bit much.

To engage in the long and rich tradition of measuring character trajectories against those in the Avatar: The Last Airbender cartoon, let's compare Kipperlilly to Azula. Azula had an incredibly sympathetic backstory and untreated mental health issues. Azula was also a danger to herself and others, as well as profoundly manipulative and abusive (although, it was a children's show so Azula never killed anybody for whatever that's worth). Do I wish that fourteen-year-old girl had an Iroh-type in her life? Literally one adult who loved her genuinely and advocated for her best interests? Of course I do. I saw the Ember Island episode, I watched that one video essay! Does that mean it was any less satisfying to watch Zuko and Katara kick her absolute ass? No! And it was non-lethal anyway, children's show, duh.

That brings me to my other thing; Kipperlilly is a character in a fictive work that is not finished. And I know that point will age poorly, but I'm thinking it won't be the only one (hey-o). Remember the people that were calling The Bad Kids bullies? And then we learned that Kipperlilly hated Riz because his fucking dad fucking died?? And that was a full academic year before getting reanimated by a rage god?? I'll do a tame one; remember when Gilear wasn't cursed?? He was "just a guy"?? The show is serialized, gang, the world is still building! Clerickiller is not done yet, y'all need to let her cook! I'm sure we'll tune in next week to see her graduate from "unhinged" to "unaffiliated with the door frame or any frame-like structure". Reprimanding people on Tumblr will not change the trajectory of this character who, by the way, has not expressed remorse or any desire for a path other than violence. You look me in my black face after your blorbo slits a kid's throat and say "help her"?? Kipperlilly doesn't want get better right now, she wants one thing and that's for Kristen Applebees to go fuck herself and die!! You were there, you heard it!! When the fictional behavior changes, as it often does in stories, so will my opinion. There is no fore-forgiveness. Without an actual redemption arc I will continue to see the villain as a villain.

Speaking of, I think what some people have an issue with is the level of hate Kipperlilly's getting and how aggressive it is. But like.... isn't that allowed?? Because of all the stuff I said but also because like, mama said that it was okay! And by "mama" I mean Siobhan Thompson who said Kipperlilly belongs under the jail. Sure, in the real world, adults don't tell kids they belong in the ground that's crazy fucked up, but all these kids are played by adults and Emily as Fig joked that she was gonna smite the sixteen-year-old girl played by the thirty-something man. You're telling me the antagonist antagonizes the protagonists, and the protagonists go "boo, hiss" and then I, the audience, go "boo, hiss as well" but I'm wrong? I'm wrong, somehow, cool checks out.

"They're XP Levelling*punches a locker*!!"

"That girl is worse than Kalvaxus."

"Littledoggy Girlcollar"

Am I not engaging with the narrative on it's own terms if I say "i'd tell Clerickiller to die mad, but she clearly already did, Jojo Siwa head-ass, in reference to that fuck-ass ponytail and your toxic yuri" Do I need to draw a little caitmay-style OC to say it for me, would that be better?

God-forbid, we have fun? Must we discourse, always? FourDogs is tragic, FourDogs is compelling, FourDogs is Dani from 9th grade. She is Azula from Avatar and Clare from Fleabag and Brennan Lee Mulligan from my dreams and that is something that can be so personal. But no one else has to participate in your parasocial relationship. What's crazy is, I actually like Kipperlilly! As a character. I mean, the "trauma is privilege" obviously hit a nerve with me because of real life stuff, but the image of her over the rogue teacher's grave?? With a backhoe and a "gotcha, bitch" expression??? Come on, that is fresh-off-the-vine Cunt™. Even more so than I imagined that moment to be when we first heard about it. Her ending up in a Ragh or Aelwyn place would be way more satisfying than a Goldenrod or Penelope Everpetal place, BUT IT WILL ALSO be satisfying to see whatever Kipperlilly's version of the locked-in-a-chokehold-and-being-gaslit-into-thinking-you-shit-the-coach's-pants-scene is. In addition to the non-lethal ass-kicking that proceeds it.

Y'all can chuck the insinuation that something so clearly subjective is actually objective and has moral implications that make me bad, directly in the garbage. What is this, religion, hey-o.

#lost some civility there at the end #but shit im not iroh #im a hater first #and an advocate for mental health third #and second i am an advocate for poc's getting their lick back against white people #especially if they were hurting your academic prospects #yes riz is a poc even though he's played by murph #me and demi adejuyigbe talked about it #fhjy spoilers #dimension 20 #d20 #kipperlilly copperkettle #brennan lee mulligan #fhjy #fantasy high junior year #the bad kids

[laststandx3]

When Jesus pretended to be dead for 3 days it's a miracle and everyone is sympathetic. But when I, James Somerton-

#james somerton #hbomberguy #Sorry #just to be clear i dont wish somerton any harm #for the money he tricked people into donating i'm sure there will be a lawsuit. maybe?? #for the plagiarism idk if and how the law applies #for his personal mysoginistic racist etc views i've seen maybe one of his videos years ago and i don't remember his claims #i just think that as an influancer / youtuber he's a public figure and it's not the public's responsability to cater to his mental health #whether his mental health issues are real or just excuses #i'd rather he change career and be held accountable than he hurting himself #being in a bad mental state doesn't justify your actions #especially if the bad mental state is directly caused by the conequences of said actions

[strrwbrrryjam]

what's the point of liking antagonists and villains if you're just going to justify and ignore every act of antagonism and villainy - can people please learn to be more comfortable liking characters who aren't good without feeling this incessant need to change them.

like be fucking for real, be an apologist but at least acknowledge that they did all that without trying to justify their behaviour.

i'm so tired of people finding excuses for dutch and micah (even arthur, too). it's never "dutch took advantage of a fucking genocide because he's a bad person" or "dutch abused his girlfriend because he's a bad person" it's always "dutch did these things because he's mentally ill/bonked his head".

by attributing his actions solely to mental illness, you're inadvertently stigmatizing mental health issues rather than addressing the complexities of his behaviour.

like I won't deny he is mentally ill, nor will I deny that his mental state is clearly deteriorating over the course of the game but he didn't do these things and more because he's mentally ill, he did this because he's a bad person.

the head injury theory also completely ignores the fact that he was already acting erratic earlier in the story, far back into chapter two.

i mean, he shot an innocent woman during the blackwater massacre for no apparent reason, and that's where I would argue he is the most stable before he injured his head in chapter four.

fortunately for micah, there isn't much people use to justify his behaviour, mostly because what he does is downright deplorable, but the excuses for him are just as stupid, whether linking to his upbringing (ignoring the fact that there are people like lenny, tilly, charles, sean, kieran and even arthur who had an incredibly similar childhood to micah who are all marginally better people than micah) or the fact that when he turned the gang in 'for the greater good' when no, he did it because he was cruel and greedy and he continued to be an outlaw where he ended up murdering a child in cold blood.

even arthur, like I've talked a length about the good arthur does and how good of a man I believe him to be, but he still abandoned his family due to his loyalty for the gang, he still beat a sick man closer to his death, he still terrorised and robbed and injured and killed innocent people and those acts are unforgivable.

people have got to learn how to like nuanced characters without stripping them of their complexity because otherwise, then that is the point.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 dutch van der linde #dutch van der linde #rdr2 micah bell #micah bell #rdr2 arthur morgan #arthur morgan #strawberry speaks

[qsycomplainsalot]

I want your take on something given your history-tied art (excuse spelling errors, my hands are very cold:) when does alt-history or general historical fiction writing become “inappropriate?” I’m not talking about political LARP but the portrayal and inclusion of real world historical figures. I like the web series “The Monument Mythos” which includes a President James Dean as a satire of cult of personality political worship of especially authoritarians. And my fav episode of Red Dwarf is the one where JFK was on the grassy knoll. However a lot of HOI4 mods (millions of people such as me suffer from Paradox Strategy Game ADHD thots and prayers) have these issues. Pre rewrite, The New Order (made by self identified leftists) wrote Himmler as a cackling fascist-style-posadist supervillain and Fuhrer Albert Speer as a liberal pro democracy human rights reformer. Even post rewrite issues still exist such as portrayal of politicians who were victims of the Lavender Scare now being perpetrators. I also feel Red Flood has a problem with a dictator Antonin Artaud who was portrayed as a futurist schizo madman when IRL I don’t believe he aligned with the futurists and his mental health issues only developed at the end of his life.

Well my stance on this is, if the message is interesting then at least that's a redeeming quality. Like sure you may be using actual historical people in a video game, but a video game can tell an interesting message just like a book can. Maybe flipping the historical narrative gives an interesting point of view. And then like in a lot of what you just described it's just pulp... which, I appreciate pulp, but when you're making a mockery of people linked with genocide I think it's disrespectful to the people still alive to remember it. Conversely it's very much less dicey to do that with older figures, BECAUSE the defining factor of whether you should or shouldn't is very much "does anyone care about this". If you make a cartoon supervillain out of a nazi that's bad and disrespectful of everyone still living in the aftermath of their actual crimes, but you don't have this problem with say Charlemagne or Gengis Khan destroying entire cultures centuries ago. No specifically with HOI I think the issue is that this game's modding community is a hotbed of people trying to make Germany win WW2, which is a huge red flag.

#history

[genericpuff]

same anon as last ask. I also have to note: i dont think there are any good reasons for domestic abuse. there are none. you said hades didnt deserve to get slapped but then had previously said "as if the victim of the slap wasn’t a guy who was just as if not more abusive than she was in that relationship in his own fucked up way". reading that it does feel like you are saying he deserved to be slap or trying to justify it. maybe you arent tho? btw i dont give a shit about that man lmao

No, and you're right! But that's always the assumption people make whenever defenses for Minthe are made - that by empathizing with Minthe, or by pointing out that Hades was just as shitty in the relationship as she was, you're excusing domestic violence and abuse - and they're very... strawmen assumptions, IMO.

(TW: abuse)

The issue with the Minthe debate is that a lot of people fail to hold every other abusive character in the comic to the same standards they hold Minthe, and they fail to recognize everything that led up to the slap.

Like, when Hecate slapped the shit out of Hades for being into Persephone, where were people then? It was played off for laughs.

But then Minthe slaps Hades once during an emotional breakdown and all of a sudden she's an irredeemable villain.

No one deserves to be physically or verbally assaulted whether or not mental health is involved. But when mental health is a factor in cases like Minthe - which it is because she was initially designed with BPD until Rachel retconned it on Discord - it's one of those "it's a reason, not an excuse" sort of deals. If LO Minthe was being written by someone who actually cared about mental health representation, she would have been given the same opportunity to grow and learn from her mistakes and past transgressions just as Hades and Persephone have been given.

Instead, Minthe is a villain for having a moment of cruelty during a breakdown, and Hades and Persephone never seem to have to own up to the shit they do. Abuse is never okay, but LO is essentially saying "abuse is okay if you're cute and rich and if you make funny meme faces while you do it."

Characters like Minthe are WAY more interesting than Hades and Persephone BECAUSE of their flaws, she isn't peddled as perfect, she's real. Minthe and characters like her are raw and genuine, they don't feel like they're putting on some act of "niceness", they feel like people, people who make mistakes and fuck up and suffer consequences for their decisions and their action. I've seen a lot of people empathize with and enjoy Minthe's character simply because they do see themselves in her, they see her vulnerabilities and her flaws and her fears and recognize that she's not perfect. Some people truly are irredeemable beyond repair, but Minthe... Minthe still had a fighting chance. We had that chance when she first dumped Thetis, it was so cathartic to see her take control of her own situation and healing... but then RS backtracked on it immediately because she accidentally made the character who she knew she wanted Persephone to turn into a plant way too empathetic. So instead she opted to dial up Minthe's shittiness to 1584923108 in order to get her audience to hate her - and to ensure anyone who did still empathize with her look abusive by extension.

She didn't need or deserve 'another chance' from Hades, or Hecate, or the other people who she had already hurt countless times. But she does deserve to give herself the chance to grow and learn and move forward to something better. We all do. It's why forgiveness is one of the most essential first steps in growth.

I'm tired of reading about H x P "forgiving" themselves for what they do with false platitudes of TherapySpeak. Because they never learn, they keep acting like shitheads and much of their behavior comes across as fake and disingenuous, like they're just putting on a show. And that's when they actually acknowledge their behavior, more often than not their bullshit is celebrated.

I don't want to celebrate abuse. I want to see character development. You can't develop or grow if you're deluded into thinking you're not doing anything wrong. Persephone and Hades have nowhere to go. Minthe had an entire life ahead of her away from Hades and Thetis... and we were robbed of the chance to witness it.

But that's just my two cents.

#tw abuse #lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #antiloreolympus #ama #ask me anything #anon ama #anon ask me anything

[gumpistol]

Send ❤️ + a URL and I’ll write something nice about them/their blog!

   *clears throat*  WILDER I LOVE YOOOOOU!! 

    wilder is, as they would say, just as "hamster-brained" as me! and if we had giant hamster balls, i imagine we would run into each other and fall over. no real reason, it's just a funny thought in my head! for realsies though, they really do support the chaotic gremlin energy that i want to put out and i appreciate it so so much! they are so incredibly friendly and authentic and fucking hilarious even if they don't think so. it's not uncommon to find myself having long conversations with them about any topic, whether silly muse things, deep character analysis, or just life in general ( we have a few things in common teehee~ ). they are an open and understanding person who has successfully made me cry ( yes wilder, you did it, you achieved that heart event ), and they make it easier and comfortable to want to unmask and be myself. :) 

    that being said, wilder's doflamingo portrayal is *chef's kiss*. i never thought i'd ever really want to write with a doffy, because in all honesty his character scares me, but wilder writes him so well, and they recognize, analyze, and portray all of his mental health issues without trying to redeem him or make excuses for his behaviors as a character. any time they talk about him on the dash or in my DMs, i can't help but nod and say to myself 'yes, yes wilder, you get it!!' i fully trust them to write doflamingo's character in an interesting and appropriate way that gets me excited to write with them! even when their doffy is so incredibly accurate and unsettling and creepy. 

    but i can't not mention that they also write an amazing rosinante?! who makes me feel sunshine and warmth and all smiley when i read wilder's stuff for him — smiley like the smiley potatoes that rosi gave luffy for valentine's day~ i've been giving so much attention to doffy, but i definitely need to write more threads with their rosi as well!

    i know we BOTH get anxious about the fact that we can never shut the fuck up, but i really do appreciate wilder for talking with me a lot and humoring my ideas. they are so willing to listen to me ramble about my OC and to jump into interacting/plotting in some of my verses and ships, and it makes me that much more excited to write as a result! i love them very many and they deserve so much kindness and tenderness and love, as someone who so openly offers it themself.

    anyway, wilder and i are running away together and moving to seattle, and rabbit doesn't know this yet, but he's coming with us. <3

sent by: @enruiinas & @ferromagnetiic for: @mingos

#mingos #enruiinas #ferromagnetiic #long post cw #❝ its not like ‘thanks’ are something i can eat ❞ — answered #❝ adhd thought dump ❞ — ooc #i burped just as i finished this #in case you wanted to know :) #anyway if i made typos no i didn't

[gecko-s-greenhouse]

So, I'm reading this webtoon. It's incredibly well written, and depicts the imperfections of human interactions with beautiful illustrations. I absolutely want to give it more traffic, so I'll tell you what it's called: Big Ethel Energy.

It deals with issues like body image, self confidence, friendship, loyalty, mental health, healthy relationships. The list goes on and on, and to keep going would be to make a list of everything that we experience in daily life.

But obviously I don't use this platform solely to sing praises. Today I want to complain about an awful group of people who lurk in the comments of this webtoon, and I want to do it in a way that protects me from getting eaten alive (again).

Spoilers for chapter 51 and earlier. You've been warned! 

Two of the current topics being handled in the webtoon are: consent and forgiveness.

The context: Betty and Seth are two main-adjacent characters. Seth has been flirting with Betty (his employee and friend) for an indeterminate period of time but doesn't want to pursue a romantic relationship with her. Lots of mixed signals. Betty has an unrequited crush on Seth.

It remains unclear/open for discussion/ open for readers to project their own experiences on whether Seth is aware of Betty's feelings for him, if he's responsible for not overtly discouraging her if he does, and how long this has been going on for (you can tell who's a Seth apologist by how they answer these questions)

Things came to a head a couple episodes ago when Betty was mad at Seth for saying some pretty judgemental things about her best friend, he made a grand gesture of apologizing to her, Betty was overcome with emotion, kissed Seth, and Seth turned her down, drawing professional boundaries. Betty turned to her best friend for emotional support in these trying times, and in an effort to help Betty get over Seth, her best friend encouraged her to say such things as, "SETH IS THE WORST!"

Here I'll say that the commenters on this webtoon are pretty confused. Unlike other webtoons where the OTP is clear and there's lots of consent and positive feedback, things are pretty messy in this one. Characters are imperfect, and it's an excellent reflection of real life. I applaud the author, but this has also proven divisive among the commenters.

The consensus among the commenters is that in this situation, Betty has committed sexual assault and Seth is the victim.

Yes, you read that right.

The commenters also take issue with Betty calling Seth "the worst" seemingly because he drew some boundaries.

Nevermind that Seth has been stringing her along for an indeterminate period of time. Nevermind that supportive friends sometimes say absurd things to help you feel better. Nevermind that "the worst" might not be referring to the boundaries at all, but to his mixed signals.

Betty has been made out to be the Devil incarnate and Seth has been given a pass in this situation because he's "the victim."

Seth is not the victim. He had a hand in creating the situation, whether he was aware of it or not. And, just in case you haven't read my entire library of posts complaining about people with bad behavior: "not knowing" does not excuse bad behavior.

This goes for Betty too - she wasn't aware of Seth's boundaries, she crossed one, and now has to make amends. But it's clear that Seth isn't holding that against her (even if the commenters absolutely are) - he's forgiven her in the next chapter and is asking after her well-being.

So, I, being an idiot, hopped into the flame war and called for empathy for Betty. In response, I was called a sexual assault apologist. 

Yes, you read that right.

In response to my call for empathy, I got the opposite. I had the door of discourse slammed in my face in the worst possible way.

So I'll tell you now, my captive audience:

I called on the commenters to consider if they'd ever been strung along, if they'd ever had an unrequited crush, if they'd ever experienced a grand gesture. In response, the comment section made excuses for Seth.

Seth! Is! Not! A! Victim!

I called on the commenters to consider how they would react if their longtime crush rejected them. What kind of support they would like from their friends, what kind of support they would give to their friend. How quickly they themselves would be able to spring back from such a rejection and carry on working as colleagues.

I called on the commenters to consider their own lives. To consider if they'd ever been encouraged to, "Go for it! Seize the day!" and had that backfire in a way they needed to repair. Whether they'd want their repairable mistakes held against them as a black mark on their record, as a permanent stain showing that they should never again be given a second chance.

I believe in second chances. I believe in forgiveness, in empathy, in understanding that as humans we will make mistakes, and that we have a right to move forward from them, to not be made to feel as less-than by a crowd of holier-than-thous.

(I also believe in pattern recognition, but that's a discussion for another day.)

#webtoon #big ethel energy #empathy #Seth is not a victim #the internet sucks #rant

[nosks]

hey can you guys please stop putting posts from this blog on my dashboard. i really did not want to have to post this but its harmful to my mental health when i have to see it bc of how they try to falsely portray themselves.

this blog misconstrues articles and mislabels what they actually are, one article that i read linked in a post they made, in which they painted a 19 yr old and his mother as victims to the system when they were arrested for bringing his 15 yr old girlfriend to another state for an abortion even though the article clearly stated the girl stated that she felt she had no choice but to do whatever they told her to and the age gap in of itself should have been telling enough. they also post a lot of articles defending p/rnh/b (articles giving justification such as "well other sites have CSEM on them too!!!") and painting being critical of p/rnhub/wanting justice for them deliberately hosting real rape/CSEM as just a conservative view.

more below

most recent post that was put on my dashboard by them was a post claiming a new bill proposed by republicans would make it illegal for sex workers to work for the purpose of staying in housing when it literally was just describing different terms in which something is considered sex trafficking, ie when housing, essentials, ect are held over your head by another person to coerce you into working. and meanwhile the actual fucking issue with the bill - which ppl would know if they actually tried to read it - was the fact they wanted to make it so you cannot access porn without submitting your literal ID and forfeiting all anonymity, whether youre a sex worker or just viewing a porn website. and they were using the excuse of "protecting kids" again.. So yknow.. a lot similar to KOSA? just except its not the entire internet, but who knows since theres porn on social media, it might have considered social media a porn website.

you'd think that would be the main pressing problem with a bill like that, but no.. the problem to them was that it was making something illegal thats already illegal but trying to make you think its about something else entirely! truly such an outstanding job at exposing the realities of rape culture. I dont think I need to explain why seeing them claim THAT was the problem with the bill was wildly triggering!

and I'd really prefer to not get so triggered that i can't go about my day bc i came online to look at bugs and ended up seeing that blog on my dashboard being portrayed as what its not.

#.txt #might i add that is almost exactly the same age gap my bio parents had lol #rape tw #csa tw #im not going to go on the blog again to find evidence like #i dont care if some shit they post really is bad they usually dont even acknowledge the part thats actually bad #and instead call something else they've misconstrued as the actual problem with it #i really cannot stand seeing them anymore #blocklist

[mental-health-advice]

hi.. can you give me some advice, an answer, anything? i have anxiety and adhd (undiagnosed), and i always procrastinate when i receive a text. it gets so out of hand, almost constantly over almost a month, and then i panic when thinking about responding and how my friends must despise me. what is this mental block that's keeping me from talking to them, and how can i tell them about my issues with texting and self control and procrastination without scaring them away? ive already inconvenienced them so many times, and i just keep apologising over and over again. i feel guilty and afraid that my mental illnesses aren't even real and i have no excuse for my awfulness, i'm sabotaging myself and i don't know how to continue. is this my fault? (i know it is, but i can't even accept it). maybe my mind is just clouded,but thank you for giving me a space to vent here.

Hey there,

This, what you are going through with struggling to reply to txt messages that people send you is definitely not your fault and nor does it define who you really are as a person.

I think it’s really important in this situation to try to take a step back and try to think back to if there was ever any bad experiences you have had whether it was consciously or not and if this is the reasoning behind your current struggles. This may not be the case at all for you but sometimes when we struggle to do something so in your case replying to people’s txt messages, there is a reason behind it whether it be big or small.

I know that for me I too struggle to reply to people’s txt messages/ messenger messages at times as well. For me, it is a fear of being stuck in a really long conversation with them. Now, this is not because I hate or despise them, it’s just where I am at mentally at the moment and I guess isolating just a tad too much! If though I get a message from someone overseas who I know won’t reply to my message until the following early hours of the morning when I am asleep then I find it a bit easier to reply. So I guess what I am asking you is if there are any fears surrounding replying to messages or any fears of bad outcomes from happening if you were to reply.

It sounds like your friends are pretty amazing and patient with you, this is a good thing. And so perhaps just letting them know if you can that currently, you feel unable to reply to their messages but it by no means because you hate them! Is this something that you feel you may be able and comfortable enough to do? It’s OK if it’s not, this is just a suggestion!

In regards to your mental health issues, again it sounds as though you are second guessing yourself. I am wondering and encourage you to see a counsellor or a therapist and try to talk through these issues with them. There may also be an underlying issue that you aren’t even aware of that causes you such distress when you get messages and it comes to replying to them. Again, none of this is your fault and sometimes it can just be a really deep-rooted issue for why things are how they are right now!

I really hope that this has helped a bit and please do let us know if we can help to support you in any other way!

I’m thinking of you and hope that you are going well!

Take care,

Lauren

#mha-lauren #advice #advice blog #mental health advice #anonymous #replying to messages #struggles #talking about it #getting help and support #anxiety

[nim-lock]

WHO HURT BOBA WHY WAS HE HAVING SELF LOATHING THOUGHTS

YOU KNOW WHAT, I’ve impulse written enough for this to be a second prompt fill for Day 5, so hello @bobadinweek Day 5 Hurt/Comfort Part 2 !!!

Word count: 1171 [content warning: MENTAL HEALTH]

The entire day had felt off. It felt like many other days, in the endless drudgery of being alive. Boba woke to overcast skies over his area of Tatooine, normally a source of relief and contentment. He moved his body through the daily litany of meetings, beat up a comically ill-prepared assassin, and showed up to game night, organized by Fennec and some of the full-time staff. Din waved at him from his spot on the floor, and Boba's eyes skittered away from the helmet's visor.

Nothing was wrong.

Boba couldn't enjoy it.

It had been, by all accounts, an entirely mundane day. The issues that cropped up were all solvable. Boba Fett had consumed an adequate amount of nutrients over the course of the day, and he was now partaking in a social activity. This was fine.

As Fennec went through the instructions for the newly released bantha-befriending board game, Boba became increasingly aware of Din's presence by his shoulder. Or perhaps he was projecting, and Din wasn't paying extra attention to him at all. After all, their relationship was a relatively recent development. They really didn’t know each other well enough. 

The game progressed; pieces were taken, traded, and moved; Boba made the appropriate noises of encouragement, amusement, and outrage. He interacted with Din a reasoned amount. He watched himself go through the motions as though through a thick haze of fog. Boba put his pieces back after the first game and excused himself, citing a need for routine weapons maintenance. Fennec flipped him off, and told him she’d see him the next morning.

--

Boba sits heavily on his mattress and lets his face contort into the positions he’d held off on doing the entire day. He takes off his armor with the routine amount of reverence befitting belongings of his father. He’s not sure how he feels about the lack of plated pressure on his chest. He hears a ragged gasp, and a sound like a wounded deer, and it takes longer than it should for him to realize it’s coming from his own wretched vocal chords. He’d make an effort to stop making this ambient soundtrack of his life, but it feels like more energy than he can give at the moment. 

There’s a knock on the door.

Boba schools his face back into a semblance of composure, and is momentarily comforted by the knowledge that the soundproofing in his room is solid. He sees Din’s helmet through the peephole. 

“Hello,” he says, opening the door a crack. He is confronted by smooth beskar. Din has taken off his armor, with just the helmet remaining. For the second time that night, Boba’s not sure if he can read the man’s body language. Or rather, clues point to Din exhibiting the emotion of “concern”, but that can’t be right. 

“Can I come in?” Din says. “Are...you okay? Is there anything I can do?”

“No,” says Boba, roughly. Before he remembers the first part of what Din said. “Yes—you can come in. If you want. I don’t think you can help me, however. I’m not good company right now.” 

Din regards Boba for a long moment, then slowly walks into Boba’s room. The room is sparse, and Boba is glad that it does not reflect the chaos of his mental state. He’s never had many belongings, what with his ready-to-go-at-any-moment lifestyle and understanding that attaching sentiment to too many things was even more loss to bear.

Boba remains standing near the door. “What do you want?”

“I just wanted to see how you were doing,” says Din, awkwardly, fidgeting with the seam of his belt. “You don’t have to tell me anything, of course, but...I’m trying. To be a good friend.” 

Boba stares resolutely at a plant to Din’s left, debating whether he should tell Din nothing. Whether he should just laugh it off and pretend everything was alright. But he’s not sure if that would help. He doesn’t want to see Din’s regard for him gradually deteriorate as he realizes that Boba could never be the right person capable of caring for him properly. 

The air is tense. Boba knows he himself is the one making it so. If Boba’s going through this, he might as well rip the bandaid off the entire way. So he can lay down and fuck himself up and force himself to pick up the jagged pieces, and know, that he is destined to be alone. With the vaguely masochistic satisfaction of knowing he's about to twist a knife into his own figurative insides, he speaks.

“I’m rarely happy,” Boba blurts out. “I mean. You—you met me at a point where I was. Happy. Content. As good as it could have been under the circumstances. But that’s not me all the time. Most of the time, it’s like..... this.” 

“Alright.” Din says, levelly. Waiting for him to go on. 

“I’ll fuck this up. Life continues to happen and it’s not bad, but it feels like I can’t...appreciate it. It feels like I should. It feels like I should be glad to have lived beyond all expectations. I don’t—you know—I. I know I brought down the mood of the entire gathering today. I know I made everyone uncomfortable. And I can’t help that. It feels like I should be in control of my thoughts and actions but. There’s only so much I can pretend to be...a person that people want...to be near.” Boba’s heart rate feels way too high. His breath is too shallow. He thinks a heart attack right now would be quite nice, actually. So he can get out of this situation. His eyes are unseeing. Is his vision fading?

His brain is full of bantha wool and Boba knows some time has passed because the next time he is aware of his own skin, he is sitting down, and Din has his hand in his hand, and a hand almost touching his face, and. And it almost feels like reality is real, just at those prickling points of contact. Din’s talking. He’s been talking and Boba didn’t process a word of it before now. 

“Hey—look at me—listen; you matter. Alright? Remember this. Take a deep breath for me.” 

Boba doesn’t think he has the energy. Everything feels too much. 

“It’s... okay,” Din says, a stilted attempt at saying the right things to make someone feel better, “Or maybe it’s not, but I’m not giving up on you just because you happen to be a person, Boba.” 

Boba...sits. And tilts his head forward, and leans into Din’s shoulder. Arms encircle his body, and he breathes. It smells like laundry detergent, sweat, and a lingering hint of metal. Boba doesn’t know what he’ll say after this moment passes. He doesn’t know the right thing to say, and... maybe he doesn’t have to know. He breathes, and feels the pounding in his chest fade to a background lull. This? This is good. 

#content warning discussions about depression #WHUPS I shouldn't have typed this much my hands hurty #lol I'll proof read this another day when my hands are working #bobadin #bobadinweek2021 #my writing #idk I don't think that's a tag yet because I do not often write things #but AHHHH fuck I have to get work done but my brain is to wibbly #fuck it byeeee

[dark-magician-girl-meets-world]

honestly, im really, genuinely curious, and I’d like to hear you talk about it. Why aren’t psychopaths an actual thing?

Yes! Thank you for asking! So, let’s start with the most obvious question: what is a psychopath? You certainly hear the word a lot. People will also frequently say sociopath. They’re used kind of similarly, mostly. What’s the difference?  Well, this is the problem we run into. There isn’t any fixed definition. The usual authority on these issues is the DSM, or Diagnostic Standard Manual. It provides names and agreed on definitions that accredited psychologists will diagnose. There’s no category in it called “psychopathy” or “sociopathy”. No similar organization has such a definition.  But isn’t there a checklist or something? Yes, there is, but it’s not put out by an organization like the DSM. It was written by a random psychiatrist as a proposal and it hasn’t found universal acceptance. There are a few writers who write about psychopaths and sociopaths, but all of them have their own definitions, meaning there’s no one universal definition you can pin it down to. That means it can’t be diagnosed or even defined, really.  But that’s not the biggest problem with the idea of psychopathy and sociopathy. It probably wouldn’t be too hard for the psychiatrists who write about it to get together and agree on a single defined symptom list. There even are already two diagnoses in the DSM that people who worked on it say were meant to be their stab at representing what a diagnosis for the general idea of sociopathy/psychopathy might look like: antisocial personality disorder and dissocial personality disorder. Those diagnoses are defined, but not officially linked to the terms psychopath and sociopath.  So what’s the bigger problem? Well, to answer that we, first have to look a little closer at what a diagnosis actually is. The usual idea people have is that every diagnosis represents some kind of brain, something real inside the mind of the person it’s a diagnosis of. According to this idea, a diagnosis has a sort of causal power: you act in certain ways because you have a certain type of brain.  But that idea is more like the GOAL of psychiatry, not the reality. In reality, especially for personality disorders, it’s the opposite. Rather than people acting a certain way because they have a diagnosis, they are diagnosed because they act a certain way. Every diagnosis is a list of behaviors, and if you meet a certain number of them, you’re eligible for the diagnosis. But it’s hard to know if people act that way because of that diagnosis, that is, that it represents something about their brains or if it’s just an arbitrary grouping. It would be as if we grouped animals based on what they DID rather than whether they can breed. “Skittering” might represent a meaningful group of animals, but would “swimming”? Or “hiding?” Maybe several different diagnoses represent various different ways people deal with a specific kind of brain. Maybe many different types of brain can lead people to act in similar ways, and get lumped into one diagnosis. So the question is: when we look at the sorts of behaviors that people tend to associate with the terms psychopathy/sociopathy, is there reason to think that they represent a sort of brain, as there is with, for instance, the term autism, or is there reason to suspect that many kinds of brains could behave that way and the behaviors are only associated in some other way? And HERE is the big problem with psychopathy/sociopathy. Especially when you look into the history of the terms and the research that the people who use it did, it becomes very obvious that what psychopathy really is is “commits crimes disorder”.  One of the big names in popularizing the term psychopath is Robert D. Hare. And guess where most of his research is done? Prison. And if you look at his checklist, his criteria are a mix of criteria from several other diagnoses with criteria that are subtle variants on “commits crimes”. And what other researchers, including one I’m about to quote, have found is that what happens is a lot of prisoners with completely different disorders that have been involved in their criminal history check off the criteria that are just doing crimes and the criteria that are from the issue they actually have, and thus get labeled with psychopathy rather than their real issue. Dorothy Otnow Lewis, a professor of psychiatry at Yale writes: “To this writer’s mind, psychopathy and its synonyms (e.g., sociopathy and antisocial personality) are lazy diagnoses. Over the years the authors’ team has seen scores of offenders who, prior to evaluation by the authors, were dismissed as psychopaths or the like. Detailed, comprehensive psychiatric, neurological, and neuropsychological evaluations have uncovered a multitude of signs, symptoms, and behaviors indicative of such disorders as bipolar mood disorder, schizophrenia spectrum disorders, complex partial seizures, dissociative identity disorder, parasomnia, and, of course, brain damage/dysfunction.“  And this gets to the darkest part of psychopathy/sociopathy, which is its use in the law. Despite the fact that it’s not a diagnosis, people like Hare get brought in to testify about it at trials and it increases the penalties for offenders. Psychopathy is an astonishingly, I would argue, suspiciously convenient disorder for our prison system. Once someone is deemed a psychopath, there’s no use treating them or giving them sympathetic therapy. The only answer is locking them up, because that’s all you can do with a psychopath. And fortuitously, that’s already the path of least resistance for the prison system.  So, tldr, psychopathy isn’t a real diagnosis. It doesn’t have an official definition. And the definitions people have made are suspicious. Often the people they call psychopaths have other things going on, and the term psychopath seems almost tailor made to excuse the prison system for its cruelty and failure to do anything but lock up people with numerous mental health issues. 

#psychopath #sociopath #whoof #that came out long #anyway #that's my rant #psychopathy isn't a thing #to be clear #this is all internet research #but I believe it is accurate

[renova-writes]

The Silver Shadow

Summary: The Avengers come up with a plan to capture you. Unfortunately, you are not a stupid girl. They know this and must come up with something that is foolproof. Everyone knows that this is their only chance for decades to get you and they are not messing around. You make your way to one of your many safe houses only to get captured. But, as it turns out, the Avengers want you alive.

Words: 2,007

Warnings: swearing, violence, talk of suicide

Tags: @shadowolf993 @daisy116

Other Chapters: Masterlist

A/N: I’ve got my plan for this fic FINALLY laid out. I’m sorry it’s taken so long for this chapter. I’ve been busy with the end of the school year and stuff like that. Anyways I hope you enjoy this chapter. If you do you should totally ask to join the tag list for this fic or request your own. And remember: comments and asks are always okay. 🖤🖤

Chapter 4: What was the point?

"Where do you think she is?" Rhodes asked. Fury had called him in from the Military to find you. He and the rest of the Avengers were in Tony's penthouse living room. The floor-to-ceiling windows showed off just how high up the room was. Not only displaying the might of the building, but it also had a near-perfect view of Manhattan. The city that never sleeps was illuminated by the pinkish-orange glow of the sunset.

"According to my calculations and the report of the Special Ops on the train that reported her. She is approximately 80 miles outside of Quebec. "Vision said, "Whether she is aware of that proximity or not, our best move would be to have a watch in the city."

"Definitely," Steve agreed, "I'll talk to the mayor and call in a few favors."

"What if she never makes it to Quebec? She's probably not stupid. What if all those eyes cause her to stay off the grid? Then we'll never catch her." Tony criticized. It was true; you weren't stupid. If you got wind of an alert to look out for someone who looked even remotely like you, you were going to stay as far away if you could.

One time, you had left a witness, and they reported you to the police. Like clockwork, they put out a wanted alert. It was 1985, and you were in Los Angeles, so they had more significant issues to deal with. You got lucky because, at the time, it was the height of the terror caused by the Night Stalker.

To be honest, you had never really understood serial killers. You were technically one, but the psychopathic killers—the crazy cannibal sadists. HYDRA had checked your mental health, and the results had come back pretty standard. There was a bit of crazy in you, but hey, who doesn't have any?

Since everyone was so scared of the Night Stalker, they didn't pay too much attention to someone who had killed one minor, uninfluential politician. No one reported you, and no one cared. You left Los Angeles unscathed but a little rattled.

What if someone had reported me?... What would happen?... Thank God it didn't happen this time?... I need to be more careful…

You had learned your lesson. If you got wind someone was looking for you, they were never, ever going to find you—end of story.

"He's right," Bucky said as he walked into the room. After Steve talked to him, he went back to his room to clean up before joining the rest of the Avengers in coming up with a plan to catch you. "She's careful. There's too much on the line for her."

"Then what do we do?" Wanda asked, "How do we catch her?"

"Hear me out… We still do a watch and tell the mayor. But we don't release it to the public. We let law enforcement know and send them as many troops as we can." Clint suggested.

"With undercover cops?" Banner asked.

"Exactly," He responded. "Let Y/N think that everything is normal. That no one's looking for her."

"All in favor?" Steve asked. Everyone voted yes. It was a good idea. You didn't know it yet, but it was an excellent idea. "I'll let the mayor and police chief know then."

Steve walked out and made his way to one of the comm rooms. The rest of the avengers looked among one another. They were all on edge. Sam Wilson, who had absolutely no idea how dangerous you were, was the least worried. To him, you were just another common criminal who would be caught. On the other side of the spectrum, Bucky could barely keep himself together. After excusing himself, he walked to the bathroom, locked the door, and wasn't heard from for a few hours.

Everyone else waited for a while to see if they were still needed before making their way to various spots. Some, like Nat and Wanda, went to their rooms. Banner went to the lab with Tony, and Clint went to the gym.

---------------------------------------

You were no better off than you were yesterday. Maybe you had clothes, sure, but you also managed to have sex with an asshole and assault the guy. Alex wasn't going to remember it, but that didn't make it right. Out of all of the things you had done, your conscience said that was the worst. You had acted like a monster. Hopefully, he would be okay. You wouldn't.

After storming out of the King's Treason, you found yourself on a dirt road through a forest. It was the middle of the night, and all the stars were awake. You wondered what was up there. After watching the Battle of New York unfold on television, you were well aware that you weren't alone in the universe. Thor had made that clear. But you still didn't know precisely what there was. In your mind, the galaxy was rich with alien life. Things that looked like humans but with rainbow-colored skin. Somethings that looked nothing like humans. You wondered if it was like Star Wars showed it. That would be cool. But you didn't know, because you had never seen an alien in real life before.

When you stared at the stars, there was always one that stood out to you. It wasn't the biggest or the brightest, but it was the most beautiful. If someone asked you if you wanted to go to space and you could go to any star or place, that would be the one. It didn't matter if nothing was there, but you knew there was. You just knew. The moon was bright tonight too. It dimed out the light of the surrounding stars and made the night on Earth a little brighter.

There was only one road to follow. Since all roads lead somewhere, you picked one and started walking. The night was peaceful and quiet. That was what you needed. You looked at your watch that had a compass on it. You were heading southeast.

The scenery remained the same for the first few miles. Suddenly the forest began shifting into the countryside. The rolling hills morphed into gated suburbs. A quick glance at your GPS told you that you were in Quebec.

Quebec…. I have a safe house here… Finally some peace and quiet…

You walked for an hour until you found the road that led to the neighborhood your house was in. It had been a few years since you had gone to his house. Everything was the same, but a little different. The streets were emptied in the early morning air, but it wasn't the same Quebec that you remembered. The barbershop on the corner was gone. The window that had once said Chez Berruby's Barbers had been changed to an ice cream store.

The more you looked, the more you saw the changes. That was never a good sign. But you ignored it and kept walking down the street until you got to Rue Saint-Paul. That was your street. You were right; everything was changing. Every single house on the street looked well kept and trimmed. The bushes were perfect, and the grass was green. Then there was your safe house. The yard was brown, and the windows were cracked. It stuck out like a sore thumb, which meant you would stick out too.

It's only for a night… Or two… We'll move on again…

You looked in a small notebook you kept in your supply belt for where you had hidden the key. Under the pot shaped like a frog. Was it on the front steps? No. After searching the side gate area, the garage, and the balcony over it, you concluded that there was no frog pot. There might have been a few years ago. But a lot can happen in a year. Let alone three or four.

"Well fuck it," you muttered. You got a knife out and picked the lock. A click told you the door was unlocked, so you went inside. You opened the door and stepped inside. The house was musty and smelled like cat pee. You followed the hallway past the stairs and into the kitchen.

To be honest, you didn't know what you were expecting when you opened the fridge. Definitely not food. To your surprise, there was a moldy pizza and flat Coca-Cola. You were not that desperate. After rummaging through the cabinets, you found some cans of kidney beans. The expiration date was last week, but they'd have to do.

Halfway through the can of rancid beans, you heard the fists banging against the door.

"Y/n Y/L/N? We know you're in there." A deep voice yelled, "Turn yourself in now, and we can do this quickly and quietly. I will give you a minute to come out, and then we will come in. Understood?"

No. They were most definitely not understood. You would not be going out without a fight. They were probably going to execute you right there on the steps. If they wanted to kill you. They were going to need to catch you first.

How about a game of cat and mouse?... Maybe this mouse will bite you in the nose... Who nose...

But you couldn't take it anymore. Fear took over. Instead of fighting, your first instinct was to hide. You flew upstairs and flung yourself into the top shelf of a closet. Who cared if it wouldn't be able to hold you? You were hiding for your life. Fear crept up your spine as you saw the end come into sight. Movies always showed the last moments of someone's life as an emotional roller coaster. Maybe if you lived longer, you could have seen some more movies. But they were right.

What had you done with your life? Lie? Kill? For what? For who? What was the point? You had never trusted anyone. Never loved anyone. You didn't even know what love was supposed to feel like. If you could live again, you would try to be a regular person. To live and love. For a trip to Starbucks for an Iced Latte be a normal thing. Not something you had to plan for months for. For friends. People you could trust and care about.

You wished that you could be dying in a huge comfortable bed, with your lover holding your hand. Surrounded by friends and family. Reflecting on your life and having no regrets. You could have a beautiful funeral where people flocked from near and far to celebrate the life of the girl they all loved. Your family would get so many flowers that all the bees of the world would come and dance on your grave.

But that was a fantasy.

Instead, you were alone. Scared out of your mind on a shelf in a closet. In a house that wasn't yours. Alone.

Tears fell down your face as you compared what your life could have been to what it was. You almost wanted them to kill you so it could be over.

It's all over… And I'm… Happy?...

"Anyone in here?" A soldier called. You were surprised he couldn't hear your heart hammering through your chest. Or the hurricane in your eyes.

The footsteps of three other soldiers entered the room and began tearing it apart.

Five… Four… Three… Two… On-

"Found her!" He shouted. He opened the closet door and barely had time to get the sentence out before you shot him. You didn't even have room in your mind to feel sorry. You were numb and tired and scared for your life.

You jumped out of the closet and aimed your gun at the next guy.

He fell down. And the next. You only got shots onto those two before everything went dark.

Am I dead?... Please tell me I'm dead… Shit…

The darkness faded into blinding white. After that faded, you saw that you were in a prison cell. And not dead. Fuck.

#loki #marvel #loki laufeyson #marvel imagine #loki odinson #marvel tv show #tom hiddleston #hiddlestoners #hot hiddleston #disney plus #loki smut #loki (marvel) #loki x you #loki x y/n #loki x reader #avengers x you #avengers x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #avengers fic #the silver shadow

[uhthor]

I didn’t even watch IM 3, but what pisses me off about it is that Tony has PTSD. Yes, it’s important to show that characters have ptsd, it’s real and should be normalized more. But ONLY TONY? A whole movie dedicated to it? Tony’s the only one who was shown to have ptsd, and that fueled the fire of his fans using it as an excuse. His stans say Steve doesn’t have it????? Thor, Nat, Bruce, BUCKY? Tony’s fans care more about Tony’s mental health issues than they do Bucky’s, the longest serving POW who was regularly tortured for 7 decades

THANK YOU!!!

as someone who has had an anxiety disorder for her entire life, people praising the very basic and minimal representation of anxiety in im3 as if it’s revolutionary and the most honest portrayal they’ve ever seen upsets me.

having a portrayal of anxiety or ptsd like they did in im3 and openly labelling it as such takes away the reality. ptsd and anxiety portrayals like that of thor in infinity war and endgame (albeit it mostly terrible in the latter) were more honest. it’s messy and it’s never the same as someone else’s experience. tony’s experience was too clear cut and polished to be that realistic for me. yes it was great to have open portrayals of mental health in the media in 2013 but to say that it was the best/praise it to such high levels? not for me

tony stans irritate the fuck out of me when they say shit like he is the only one who has suffered... it’s not even a case of whether you like another character more and want to defend them (aka me with thor or bruce) it’s just the logical example of this character has had a very hard time and it should be recognised and put up there as one of the worst in place of a privileged billionaire white boy who actively chooses to ignore solving most of his problems and refuses to try and better himself. examples include: bucky, thor, steve, natasha, yelena, bruce, carol, sam, loki, hope, wanda (even though i despise her and it’s a can of worms we do not want to open rn) and so many other characters. like... these people have suffered on another level, some way more than others.

it’s cheap and nasty to try and belittle the suffering of other characters in favour of one of your own faves, but to actively ignore that other characters have it worse and continually preach that your fave has it the worst when it’s not true really irritates me. just because they haven’t had a movie or six hours of a tv show to explore their grief and ptsd and other issues, doesn’t mean they aren’t there... of course it is subjective how you interpret characters and storylines but some things (such as the tragedy of bucky barnes and his brainwashing and torture for seven decades, thor losing everyone he ever loved and cared for, natasha being tortured and turned into a weapon since childhood) are absolute and come nowhere near the suffering of other characters (tony and his supposed “worst suffering in the whole mcu”) it’s a different ball game entirely

#liv answers #anonymous #idk whether this makes sense i am exhausted #but yeah #anti tony stark

[iamanartichoke]

I haven't watched any of the Loki episodes yet (I'm procrastinating) but I keep seeing vague stuff about some big chasm between how Tom sees Loki and how apparently a lot of fans see Loki. Could you give me some specifics? Other than Loki mentioning his interest in sexes other than female I've heard nothing that could cause this kind of discourse.

I don't know if I'm the best person to ask, as I know others have articulated it much better than I can, and who may feel more strongly than I do that their Loki and Tom's Loki don't align so much anymore. Not tagging anyone bc of reasons (but feel free to comment/reblog if you wish to talk about it).

But, I do know a decent amount, so I'll proceed to write five thousand words try.

My understanding overall, is that Tom has always spoken very eloquently about Loki as a complex, fractured character who was functioning from a place of deep pain as opposed to any real villainy or evil.

(cut for length)

He was never saying any of it as an excuse for Loki's actions but as an explanation of where Loki was coming from and how he ended up in that place to start with. This mostly refers to the 2011-2013 era Loki, before the "reboot." Because so many fans viewed Loki the same way - as complex, as broken, as coming from a place of pain - there was validation, I suppose, in knowing that the actor who played the character (and whose performance was largely responsible for the character being so enigmatic and appealing in the first place) shared this view.

After the reboot with TR, Tom seemed to lean more heavily on the "god of mischief" aspect of Loki - he'd often say that his job was to have fun bc Loki was always mischievously having fun. While Loki had always been funny in a snarky, sardonic kind of way, and the "mischief" he'd get into was always just for fun and relatively harmless, after TR he was more silly-funny or slapstick funny ("funny") and his mischief was framed as a little more malicious (such as using magic to trick and then stab Thor when they were children).

So it seemed like a big departure from the previous Loki that Tom always spoke so eloquently about, and I think it's notable that when promoting TR, Tom didn't really delve into the psychology of Loki much at all when he'd talk about the character - just the "fun." So there was that. At the time, people figured it was bc he had very little control or say in what the director chose to do with his character.

Now, though, Tom has a lot more creative control (although I don't think he actually has all that much, certainly not as much as some people think he does, tbh), but while he's once again talking about Loki's psychology and identity issues and trauma and whatnot as context and backstory, he also still seems to be leaning into the "god of mischief" parts and the silly-funny parts. The show furthermore has yet to address what Loki experienced with Thanos in between Thor 2011 and Avengers, has failed to address his identity crisis after discovering he is Jotun (a throwaway 'I was adopted' line doesn't really count), etc.

So there's a lot that Tom has spoken about in Loki's story that is very much not being included in the series. Furthermore, while Tom discusses Loki's complexity when doing press, he has also said things that imply he has an idea of humiliation being a core aspect of Loki, or that Loki is someone who constantly needs to be knocked down a few pegs, or that he thinks he's profound but actually isn't, etc. I know in the past he's also made comments about Loki's mental health and how Loki might go about recovering from it, but his perspective on that whole area didn't ring true to a lot of Loki fans who also suffer from mental health issues.

So all of these things together, to some fans, makes it seem like Tom's current idea of Loki - whether it's bc he wants to do something new, or has changed as an actor, or whatever the case may be - is still a departure from the 2011-2013 era Loki and, thus, does not align with their own interpretation of Loki. Hence, a chasm appears.

^^ All of this is for context, which I tried to give as objectively as possible. Now, as far as discourse about it goes, I can't speak to that very much. Nobody that I know is angry at Tom or "betrayed" by Tom or feeling anything negative toward Tom as a person. They are, however, feeling that they may need to re-evaluate how much of Tom's interpretation they put stock into as they engage with the character, and kinda where to go from here. But I can't emphasize enough that no one acts like this is Tom's responsibility or that Tom somehow did them dirty. I also can't emphasize enough that there's nothing wrong with Tom's version and he genuinely seems to be enjoying what they've created here, and that's fabulous. There's no wank about that, at least not that I've seen from my fandom corner.

So that's the situation from the tumblr side. However, because Tom has been the "face" of the Loki series all this time, and because he's been hyped up as having so much say and influence and ideas to contribute, a lot of people got the idea that the Loki of the series would be exactly the Loki that Tom wanted to play. And when, inevitably, the show went in directions that people didn't like (my understanding is that this is mostly coming down to shipping nonsense, which I'm not even going to touch), Tom was blamed. And that's where this "discourse" is coming from, as far as I know. I don't have any real first hand facts, but people are saying that Tom's been getting death threats on social media from fans who are outraged about the Sylvie thing, or outraged about how the bisexual component is being handled, or whatever. Since this is pretty much par for the course in fandoms, I believe it.

But it seems like the shipping nonsense has gotten all tangled up in the dissatisfaction in the aspects of Loki's story that aren't being told, and in the difference in Tom's comments about Loki now vs back then, and it just ends up being a recipe for discourse, wank, and drama. So to answer your question, the chasm between Tom's Loki and some fans' Loki is the result of ... *gestures at massive wall of text* this.

#thank you for the ask! #sorry it's so long #asks #charlotte replies #tom hiddleston is my favorite unicorn #tom hiddleston has the best loki meta #not using critical tags bc i feel like this is pretty ojective #objective* #re tom. his opinions. and pre-post ragnarok. but i mean #take it as you will

[the-lady-writes-what]

“Horikoshi is pathetic and an abuse apologist”

“Endeavor doesn’t deserve a redemption arc”

“Horikoshi’s just a bad writer”

“They shouldn’t fight Dabi’s who’s mentally ill”

That’s what I’ve hearing a lot lately. As someone who’s trying to become an author, I get defensive about creators getting slandered. If you find yourself in one of these camps, keep your opinions to yourself because I don’t want to hear it. You’re free to believe what you want, but just know that I think you need to either find a new manga to read or look a little closer because I don’t think we’re reading the same thing. I'm not asking you to unfollow and block me. Do with my opinion what you want to. I’m not going to address all these issues, but I will for most of them.

“Horikoshi is pathetic and an abuse apologist”

You say that with the same energy as Gen Z kids trying to cancel Eminem. You act like he abused someone in real life. If you don’t like his portrayal of the cycle of abuse, then find something else to read. And don’t pretend like you don’t read dark content for fun but don’t condone the things that go in there. Even if he was an abuse apologist, which he isn’t, his behavior in real life would reflect that. Unless you have a connection to Japanese newspapers declaring that he’s actually an awful person, think before you type. 

What part of the manga makes you believe that Horikoshi is an abuse apologist? Is it because Endeavor’s not dead? That his family is pushing him to end the cycle of abuse he started and accept the responsibility of catching Dabi, the result of his actions? Hawks wasn’t getting an apology for Endeavor, he was getting an apology from Rei for what Dabi did to him. Hawks is likely never going to get closure for his own parental letdowns but at least he can see Shoto getting it. He even went so far as to ask if Shoto got the scar from Endeavor with a look on his face that would kill. I don’t think he would have let Endeavor get away with hurting Shoto if his expression was anything to go by. He’s accepted that he won’t get closure, but he probably thinks Shoto can.

Here’s a list of things from the manga that show Endeavor facing the consequences of his actions (abuse, neglect, and arrogance) that display the opposite of abuse apology

Throughly having his ass handed to him by that Nomu

Natsuo refusing to forgive him

Berated by his wife about how he’s suddenly assuming guilt for his actions

Distrust from the public about heroes in general

Dealing with the fact that his eldest son is a serial murderer and domestic terrorist because of the abuse he endured under Endeavor

Shoto hasn’t decided yet to forgive his father

Another near-death experience 

Being unable to fight back when Shoto is attacked by Dabi and feeling guilty about it

Having his family push him to accept the fact that he has to stop Dabi, the result of his actions

Depression and the weight of guilt of so many years ignoring his affect on his family

Where 👏 Is 👏 My👏Reading👏Comprehension👏 People? 

Ya’ll act and talk like you’re reading something entirely different and I won’t stand for smearing Horikoshi like this.

“Endeavor doesn’t deserve a redemption arc”

That’s your opinion. Some people would say otherwise. I’m not one of those, but I don’t share your opinion either. I’m in the camp that says this is a repentance arc, which is completely different. It’s not about Endeavor redeeming himself, it’s about him accepting the consequences of his actions and taking steps to make up for it. Whether or not the Todoroki family accepts his apology, that is up to them and their decisions are valid no matter what they choose. 

The only reason why I’m not an Endeavor basher is because unlike most abusers he acknowledges his past sins and is taking steps to make up for them. I wish my own father would so much as acknowledge the damage he did to me and my sister, let alone apologize for it. At least Endeavor is trying to change. How many abusers do you know of in the real world who will ever admit to having done wrong and try to make up for their actions? Not many I bet. 

“They shouldn’t fight Dabi. He’s mentally ill.”

So murdering 30+ people is mental self-care? Is that what we’re stooping to? Regardless of Dabi’s mental health, the decisions he made while on his own and away from his family were his own choices. Let’s not forget that Dabi blames his whole family for his neglect and abuse for either not doing anything to stop it or being too weak in his eyes. Dabi would burn his family alive and make Endeavor watch just for shits and giggles. Dabi is not some soft boy who needs some human affection and meds to make him feel better. Every decision he’s made on his own may be in spite to Endeavor, but they’re his decisions. 

He killed 30 people plus gods know how many when he aided in a domestic terrorist attack that devastated cities. Dabi didn’t seem all that concerned for Twice (he was using the latter for his own goals and used Twice’s death as a means to end to ruin Hawks), Mr. Compress (when he had half his guts hanging out and Dabi didn’t lift a finger), Himiko Toga (whom he hasn’t even asked about), or even Shigaraki (whom he’s despised since the beginning and is also using for his own goals). Dabi does not care about anyone. Fanon Dabi is fun and probably more mentally stable, but canon Dabi wouldn’t hesitate to kill someone if they inconvenienced him in anyway. Sorry not sorry. 

Do you know how many murderers and serial killers are out there have mental illness? Edward Gein, Edmund Kemper, Ted Bundy, Randy Kraft? Just because you have a mental illness, you don’t get to use that as an excuse. We don’t excuse Youtubers falling back on depression when they’re caught sexting teenagers and grooming children. Kill one person, maybe we can work something out. Kill 30 people and we need to put your ass in jail. I don’t care if Dabi is affected by mental illness, so has the rest of the Todoroki family and none of them decided to become serial murderers and terrorists. He’s helped throw the Japan of MHA into brutal chaos where civilians are getting hurt and killed and setting free 10,000 prisoners now causing havoc in the streets. Mental illness is no longer an excuse or even a good reason.

I’m just thankful that Dabi’s a fictional character because I don’t want to meet someone who uses mental illness as an excuse or reason why someone else killed 30+ people. We already have a big enough problem associating mental illness with serial killers and causing harm to the public, I don’t even want a fictional character being coddled because of his supposed mental illness after he gleefully admits to killing 30 people, participating a terrorist attack, and tried to kill his youngest brother, twice. 

#my hero academia #mha #mha spoilers #manga spoilers #spoilers #boku no hero academia #bnha #bnha manga #bnha spoilers #my thoughts #long post #and I'm not sorry about it this time #the lady writes what is running her mouth again #we respect horikoshi in this house #horikoshi #horikoshi is not an abuse apologist if you read the manga in its full context #leave him alone or find a new manga #endeavor is an ass but at least he's trying #more than I can about my dad #I won't respond to criticisms #just let me have my opinion #no debates #I have no energy for that

[ultimatetrashgoblin]

My thoughts on Immortal Heart Society

DISCLAIMER: These are my OPINIONS. I do not claim any of this as fact, you are allowed to disagree with me. (Spoilers for Cassius and Alanna season 1)

First impressions for this series could have been better. There are plenty of problems with this series so far that I will address, but for now, let’s focus on the positives.

The writing is beautiful. As an avid reader and writer, one of my biggest pet peeves is lazy and unimaginative writing. IHS had some incredibly written lines, and I was immediately hooked even if I hated the love interests.

(I don’t have many screenshots but here are a few I did take)

The plot is interesting. While the pacing is a bit off at times, I found the concept of a corrupt secret society intriguing, and the mysteries surrounding the father was enough to get me invested.

The Inner Circle is (mostly) likable. I’m a sucker for found family, and my favorite series on this app (EAA, QoT, GIL, etc.) will usually have plenty of group banter, and the Inner Circle is no exception. One of my favorite scenes in Alanna’s route was in Richard’s office when everyone realized Alanna and FMC were exes.

Kiran. No further explanation. Lovestruck let me date her please.

For the most part, IHS seems like a promising series. But of course, when you have plenty of amazing side characters who would make wonderful LIs, you decide to premiere your series with the arrogant asshole and the compulsive liar.

Cassius Tarkhan

I should probably begin by saying I’m usually not a fan of the “rude, snarky, arrogant” LIs and read Cassius’s route solely because I was excited for the new series. So please take what you’re about to read with a grain of salt, since I am probably extremely biased against him.

This is a direct quote from me reading Cassius’s first few episodes: “I want to punch this man in his stupid fucking face.” I said this out loud, which should give you an indication of what’s to come.

As far as first meetings go, Cassius was probably one of the worst. At first it was all “fun banter oh look at the chemistry” until he sees the invitation and becomes the most insufferable pricks I have ever seen. (I’m sorry, but was that supposed to be romantic?! If I were in FMC’s position, I would be terrified!)

Most of the season went by with Cassius being infuriating and not telling FMC anything, and me questioning if I was actually supposed to like the guy I was supposed to be romancing. The villain dude (I don’t care enough about him to try to remember his name) was boring and creepy. I also had a strong desire to punch him in the face, but I’ll settle for him turning to stone.

It wasn’t until the season finale that I actually started to like Cassius. He started to open up more to FMC, he showed vulnerability, and was generally more tolerable. Hopefully we’ll be able to see more of this Cassius in later seasons, because I believe that it might save his route and maybe I won’t want to punch him in the face as badly.

As for the ending, I’ve read the final episode multiple times and I’m still not exactly sure what happened in that final scene. Cassius tells FMC that he won’t let her meet with the Society on her own and then... is he about to kiss her? This is a genuine question I’m asking I honestly couldn’t tell. It seemed like he was going to but it was very unclear to me.

If I was going to rate this season as a whole, I’d give it a 3 out of 10. Hope to see better next season, because he does have the potential to be better, but that wasn’t shown until the end of the season.

Alanna McKenna

At first, I liked Alanna’s route. I was excited about have an LI who was an ex, she was attractive (except for that weird smirk expression what was that???), she was funny, and I’ve already talked about how much I love the writing.

Then the lying started. I’ve had the misfortune of dealing with my family, many of which are narcissistic pathological liars, so I consider myself pretty decent at figuring out patterns in their behavior. And Alanna fits them to a T.

Please note that I am in no way educated on this topic and do not have the authority to state anything as fact. I am making observations based on personal experience dealing with people like this, and I encourage you to view Alanna’s behavior for yourself and come up with your own conclusions.

My first red flag was the emotional manipulation. Near the beginning, this was in the form of flattery. If FMC started asking questions, Alanna would flirt with her, which would cause FMC to either become flustered or flirt back, both outcomes momentarily distracting her from the original topic.

To FMC’s credit, she does notice when Alanna starts deflecting (she mentions recognizing certain behaviors from when they were together), but she backs down. As someone who hates confrontation, I can understand FMC’s reasoning for this. I find trying to communicate certain issues with these people exhausting. It tends to feel like speaking to a broken record, and can become emotionally draining. However, this is the exact outcome that these people want. They hate being called out on their lies, and when pushed further (in my experience), they tend to result to guilt tripping.

The flirting I could ignore. When I first read it, I thought that was just her personality (which is partially true). But then FMC stood her ground more, and Alanna fell apart. She started crying, talking about how much pressure she was under, making up excuses (a prime example of this was her saying that she thought ghosting FMC would make it easier, which I’ll touch on later), and causing FMC to doubt her (valid) reasons for being angry with Alanna.

I feel like it’s also necessary to talk about Alanna interacting with the other society members. FMC was noticeably uncomfortable with how genuine Alanna seemed to be, and I understand the feeling of betrayal of thinking you know a person, only to see them act like a complete stranger at the drop of a hat. The mental turmoil of wondering which version of this person is the real them, and whether your entire relationship was all a lie.

That part was way longer than I expected, so let’s talk about the “villain”. I’m glad that Arabella isn’t the big bad even if she tried to kill FMC, because she seems like such a genuine person and I’m tired of season WOC be villainized in visual novels (I’m not naming names but you know what apps I’m talking about Choices). I hope that FMC and Alanna will be able to help her and her sister, and that Arabella will get a redemption arc in the future and maybe a route.

The cliffhanger was actually sort of unexpected. FMC finally called Alanna out on her bs (GOOD👏FOR👏HER👏) and tried to leave the Society. Lowkey kind of scared to see how they follow this up in season 2, because it seems like they’re ready to murder FMC.

If we ignore the LIs themselves, I did prefer Alanna’s route to Cassius’s. I feel like we got to see more of the other characters, and I thought the pacing was better. But I don’t like either of them. As I’ve said Cassius seems like he’s improving, but Alanna? Nope. I’m staying for the plot and Arabella, but I’m more than willing to drop her route if this pattern continues (especially if I decide it’s too triggering for me, my mental health is more important).

Rating: 2/10

Final thoughts

As I stated previously, while IHS’s initial premiere wasn’t the best, I believe this series has the potential to be good. My main issues are with the pacing, and above all, the LIs (which isn’t good for a visual novel story centered around romancing the LIs).

Overall rating: 3/10

This is my first time doing something like this so any feedback would be very appreciated. Feel free to offer any criticisms, and let me know if I should make a series out of this! (This did take me a while so if I decide to continue doing this it might not be posted until a day or two later)

#immortal heart society #this was way longer than I thought it would be #but I’m proud of it #blaire reviews