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#there's just a certain kind of like... power to it?
kookslastbutton · 3 days
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Guilty Pleasures ༓ jjk, kth (m) | chapter iii
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✑ Summary: Three years of being Seoul's power couple earns you nothing but a big fat divorce settlement and your face plaster on every gossip column around town. You're angry, hurt, and desperately want to move on, but worst of all? You're still in love with the man who started the whole mess, even though the most he can ever see you as is a friend. The renowned actor you've hired to be your company's new endorser seems to have a soft spot for you though. He's easy on the eyes, you'll admit, but who actually wants a divorcee like yourself? It's unrealistic really.
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pairing: ex-husband ceo!jungkook x ceo!reader, actor!taehyung x ceo!reader (not poly)
genre/AU: angst, smut, fluff, loverstoexesto ?, coworkers2?, unrequited love
Word count: 5.3k+
Warnings: some time skips (none too huge), oc and jk are both 30, Taehyung is 32, swearing, lots of introspection, tornado of emotions, morally grey characters, mentions of toxic relationships, mentions of broken home/families, themes of abandonment, mention of love bombing, reoccurring nightmares, sleep paralysis, mentions of therapy, struggles of self-blame, regret, guilt, etc., mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of sexism in the media and business world, death (minor character), life-threatening accident (major character)
playlist: Unkiss Me, Apologize, Hate That I Love You, etc.
a/n: ANGST ANGST ANGST...don't say I never warned you hahaha. Anyway, once again, I had an amazing time writing this! (although nervous af 👉🏼 👈🏼) Just FYI, there are some time skips as this starts a few weeks after the gala! So to clarify, it’s now 3 months since oc’s divorce was officially finalized, as in done (the process itself took way longer). The chapter continues from there and yeah, the pace is picked up. Okay, let’s go! Enjoy! 🥰
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Fresh linen. Warm breeze. The smell and sound of the ocean.
You know this place too well, like a memory you hoped to have forgotten. Why are you here now? You glance around, taking in the familiar details—the blank ceiling above, the soft comforter that curls around your body like silk against your skin, and delicate rose petals scattered at the foot of the bed. It’s exactly as it was before — it feels exactly the same; too quiet, too peaceful, and too good to be true.
The sunlight streaming through the window is blinding, yet it draws you in with a force you can't resist. Carefully, you stand up, your feet meeting the cool wood floor, and you shiver. Each step you take towards the window feels heavier, like wading through water. When you reach the window, you see the sandy beach below, the waves beating rhythmically against the shore. It’s beautiful, but the painful kind.
To the left, a young couple, not much older than yourself, their hands tightly intertwined, as if afraid to let go. To the right, an older couple sitting further up the beach, comfortably silent as they take in the horizon, reminiscent of their many years together. You always dreamt of achieving the latter, yet here you stand, having neither, and the chances of ever obtaining it growing dimmer with each passing day.
For many, this was supposed to be a place of happiness, a symbol of love, promises, and new beginnings, but not for you. For you, it was a cocoon, trapping you in a deceptive comfort. You close your eyes, trying to steady your rapid breathing, yet it doesn’t prove to be of much help. Images from your past that you’ve tried blocking out of your mind time and time again suddenly resurface — the arguments, the tears, the feeling of everything and nothing at the same time.
“You’re up early,” His voice startles you, causing you to spin around in a panic. At that moment, your heart tightens in your chest, and a cold sweat forms on your brow. You thought you were alone. You’re certain of it. Yet the sight of your ex-husband standing only a few feet away, his hair still damp from his morning shower, is enough to leave you completely speechless.
"Why are you here?" you whisper, your voice trembling.
"Why are you here?" he counters, his dark eyes piercing into yours. "Isn't this what you wanted? To remember us, to remember how it felt to be together?”
What? This isn't making any sense. Why is he talking to you as if he were a ghost? Your eyes search frantically around the room until you spot it—the wedding band on his finger. No, not again. You hear yourself plead, but the words don't leave your lips. All at once, the room begins to feel smaller, the walls closing in on you. You're stuck in another manifestation of your past, this time reliving your honeymoon, three years ago in Greece.
"I didn't want this," you say, your voice barely audible. "I wanted to forget this."
"But you can't forget, can you?" he says, stepping closer. “You remember this view. You remember the floors and the walls. You remember that we had our first time together here and promised our devotion to each other."
“That’s not fair, Jungkook," you reply, taking a step back, "it's not fair at all, you left me. You don't get to patronize me like this."
“We both know our marriage came with stipulations, __. So when did I ever give you a reason to stay? Or to love me?”
You’re back in the bed, the sheets now suffocating rather than comforting. The sound of the ocean is louder, more insistent, drowning out your thoughts. You want to scream, to run, but you’re paralyzed by the fear, the guilt, the regret.
"This isn’t real,” you say to yourself, tears streaming down your face. “I’m dreaming, none of this is happening.”
“You can't escape what we had, or what we lost. We’ll always be here, together __, in this place,” he says softly, reaching out to touch your hand.
"No," you whisper, pulling your hand away. "I need to wake up. I need to let go...of you."
The room fades, his figure dissolving into the shadows. The sound of the ocean becomes a distant murmur as you fight to open your eyes. Wake up, please wake up. It's your own pleads chanting in your head. Finally, with a gasp, you awake, the nightmare diminishing like vapor.
“Fuck,” you curse, fingers gripping your sheets, “just another damn dream.” Rolling onto your back, you take a deep breath before reaching out for the glass of water on your nightstand. Its coolness soothes your dry throat. You reach for your phone next, checking the time—4:47 AM. Too early to start the day, too late to attempt falling back to sleep.
Your thumb hovers over Jimin’s name in your text threads. It would be 10 AM where he is. You consider sending a message, but you find yourself at a loss for words. Forget it, you lock your phone and rise from your bed, you’ll go for a walk instead. Yeah, it’s brisk outside, but the fresh air will help clear your mind.
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After tossing on your warmest coat and scarf, you head outside, the sun beginning to break over the horizon. At first, you wander aimlessly, lost in thought as you pass the odd person or two on the sidewalk. One individual accidentally knocks into you, yet he's quick to apologize. You easily understand their rush; perhaps they've just finished the night shift and are eager to reach the comfort of home.
You imagine their loved ones who must be waiting for them. You could be wrong, and maybe you're biased, but the image you depict is a future you once envisioned for yourself—one of laughter, love, and a warm family. It’s a dream you secretly carried as a child, amidst your unstable upbringing. But as the years passed, what was once a lifelong aspiration felt more and more elusive, slipping through your fingers like grains of sand. It seems, in the end, it was just a dream…nothing more.
Of course, you've achieved other goals instead, success in your career for one. It's what you wanted most the more you became an adult. Even before Jungkook came in the picture you were thriving. Yes, you needed investors to expand, but you had already made a strong name for yourself, hence the reason his company even reached out to you for a partnership in the first place.
The second, and more formidable goal you’ve achieved was saving your company. You built your business with an earnest heart, good morals, and an ambition to serve a community. You couldn’t let it all be washed out by a larger, greedier industry giant. You had to do something. Too bad your judgment was skewed the day you saw a similar ambition in Jungkook’s eyes; he was just as determined as you to save what was his.
For a while you got what you wanted, stability for your business. But you got too invested, too short-sighted to anticipate that one day, it would all feel hollow without someone proper to share it with. Alas, your prior hopes, the ones you thought were buried long ago, began returning to you as if they were an overwhelming tsunami.
You wanted warmth.
You wanted intimacy.
You wanted a home.
You sought companionship with Jungkook but no, you read the signs all wrong. Once you dropped the L word, his attentiveness towards you skyrocketed. He began calling you while you were apart, surprising you with little gifts, and setting more time aside so you could both take Bam to the dog park on free days. But then it all stopped. After months of showering you with attention, his efforts exhausted him, so he looked for the first exit out.
You remember getting the text one afternoon— When will you be home tonight? We need to talk about something. Selfishly, you hoped he was going to tell you that you could take that trip to Fiji together. You had been hinting at it for the last two weeks. Of course, you were wrong because the last time you checked, trip itineraries didn’t come with divorce papers. At that moment, you realized that Jungkook didn’t try to love you in the slightest, he tried loving at you; love bombing 101. Your ties are now completely severed.
Yesterday marked three months since your divorce was finalized. You didn’t cry like you thought you would, but you did meet with Melody that day. As your therapist, she offered you her empathy, validation, and perspective. You feel you’ve gotten better since you started meeting with her, finally beginning to heal. Yet the unsettling dream that haunted your sleep last night shows you there are many things still left to resolve, feelings you need to confront, but where to start?
You love your ex-husband, but why?
Can it even be called love?
And do you really need him to love you back?
While you can only offer fragments of an answer for the first two, you seem to have a better-formed answer for the last.
No, you don’t need Jungkook to love you. He’s proven to you time and time again that you are not the one he can bear his heart to. He’s always reiterating that he wants you to find someone else, someone more deserving of you, whatever that means. Likely, it’s all projection. Out of the two of you, he’s the one more likely to re-marry.
As for you, you’ll always love him, at least a semblance of it. After all, he was once a part of you. But what was once a part of you, doesn’t need to be anymore. You have to let him go...though you wish you didn't have to.
You continue walking straight until you find yourself drawn to a small park overlooking the city skyline. It's fairly empty, with only a few people nearby. As you settle onto a weathered bench, you take in the view before you. It stretches endlessly. Sunrises have always held a special place in your heart—the amber glow breaking through the abyss of darkness as if a beacon of hope.
"You'll get through this __," you reassure yourself, “one day at a time.”
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“Happy six months, boss!”
A goofy, boxy smile graces the man’s lips as he leans against the doorframe of your office. You take in his appearance: crème-colored sweater paired with dark brown slacks, the fabric impeccably tailored to his tall, lean frame. His ebony hair is perfectly parted down the center and feathered out to either side of his face, giving him a soft, approachable look. The glasses are new though, round with a hint of gold. Though a minor accessory, they seem to tie the rest of the look together.
Classy, yet cozy, you hum silently, it suits him.
Everything about the way he’s dressed today complements his features—not that it could be any other way, as Taehyung could never not look good in something. You learned that the hard way when you opted against a gaudy shirt and pant set your stylists suggested he wear for a commercial. Taehyung, being a free spirit, decided to try it on for kicks, and yeah, it strangely worked. He ended up shooting the entire commercial with it on. That video’s gotten your business the highest engagement rate across all your media platforms to this day.
“Mr. Kim, does six months of working together really merit a celebratory drop-in?” You lean back in your desk chair, arms folded as you narrow your eyes at the man. You're taunting him, not that he minds.
“Please,__,” he starts, stepping further into the room, his presence effortlessly filling the space. “The only person that still calls me that is the intern who works on set with us. Makes me feel old, like I’m double my real age.”
“Well, you are older than both of us.”
Taehyung gives you the look, a mix of amusement and mild aggravation.
“Two years is hardly considered older, but if you’re done trying to prod me, I’d like to ask you a series of serious questions.”
“Okay, what?” You straighten your back, curious to know what he’s thinking.
“Red or white wine?” He waits for your response, eyes seemingly hopeful. You're unsure where he's going with this, so you delay your response, suspicious of the spontaneity of the inquiry.
“Red,” you respond, cautiously. Taehyung seems pleased.
“Strawberries or blueberries?”
“Strawberries, though I prefer cherries most."
“Science or literature?"
"Literature." You surprise him with this one. "I like books, vintage ones."
"Do a lot of reading in your spare time?" he asks.
"When I get some, yes."
"Me too. Tolstoy?"
"Occasionally," you answer. "Where are you going with this, Taehyung?"
He shrugs. "Just making conversation." He pauses before continuing, “I also happen to know a place that offers all those things plus private bookings. How about you and I go for dinner tonight, as colleagues? If you hate the wine, I’ll drink it for you.”
The weight of his request hits you like a ton of bricks. Apart from a handful of social events, you and Taehyung haven't exactly mingled outside of the office. His sudden invitation to go out for dinner takes you by surprise, especially considering the nature of your professional relationship. However, you can't deny the subtle shifts in his behavior, the way he's been checking in on you more often, especially since the Winter Gala. Weeks have passed since then, but, no doubt, the memory of that night still lingers in both your minds—the shaming from a bitter business competitor, the unwanted press shining a light on your divorce, and your ex-husband who so easily approached you like it was nothing.
Taehyung suggested for you to slip away through the back door with him, offering to drive you home himself rather than leaving you with your limo driver. But you declined, feeling embarrassed that he wasn't merely a witness to the night's events, but also made to be a spectacle himself. You never wanted him to feel like he had to pity you or coax you through your personal trials. Being a good colleague is one thing, but he didn't need to go above and beyond.
“I don’t know if I can join you tonight, I'm sorry. I have a lot to do,” you say, your voice wavering slightly. It's not far from the truth with the mountain of business reports and budget plans to look over. Though your business remains functioning, it's a lot to maintain, especially with the number of investors having withdrawn their support once news got out about your marital separation. It's unfortunate how much a person's situation and the things they've built can change on someone else's dime.
“You sure?" Taehyung tries again, careful not to sound pushy. "The place isn’t overly posh, but we could go elsewhere if you’d prefer."
“I’m sorry, Taehyung, maybe another time?” you say, fingers fidgeting with a few documents on your desk, a nervous habit you developed ages ago. “I-"
“I understand,” he says, his expression softening, a hint of disappointment flickering in his eyes before he masks it with a gentle smile. "I have a film shoot that might go late anyway. Speaking of which, I'm expected on set in about half an hour so I'm going to head out, but if you change your mind, you know how to reach me."
You nod, recalling having his contact in your phone. The two of you agreed it would be easier to coordinate meetings and schedules this way. "I will, thank you. Good luck with your filming."
As you watch him leave, a twinge of guilt tugs at your conscience. Perhaps you shouldn't have dismissed him so quickly, considering how insistent he seemed. It's as if he was genuinely looking forward to the affair.
No, you can't entertain it any further. You have no way of knowing how far the night might've led—it's best to leave Kim Taehyung alone.
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When you declined Taehyung's invitation to get dinner, you didn’t expect it to result in not seeing or hearing from him for the next week and a half. As an endorser, he doesn't work at the office regularly, coming and going as needed and since you hadn’t had any promotional projects for him recently, his absence seemed normal at first.
But this was Kim Taehyung. The same Taehyung who loved making spontaneous visits to the company, especially towards the end of the week. He often came in once, twice, sometimes three times a week to talk with Namjoon, your secretary, in particular. Somehow, the pair had become friends, and since Namjoon’s desk was near yours, Taehyung would drop by whenever he saw your door open. So, not hearing from him for 11 days straight was strange, like he'd vanished.
It was now Friday evening, the clock pushing 5 pm. You consider texting him to make sure he's okay, but wouldn’t that be hypocritical? You had agreed with yourself to leave him alone. Maybe he was on vacation, perhaps at a vineyard, or had taken on another film project. Being a highly talented actor, Taehyung had no shortage of casting directors contacting him for their movies and TV shows.
Embarrassingly, you hadn’t actually seen any of his movies. You enjoyed a good rom-com now and then, like the ones Taehyung starred in, but you usually opted for something more mindless when you had the time to watch anything.
You can imagine the loyal following he has though, as Taehyung was the epitome of a "dream boat" with his natural good looks and expressive eyes. He must be good at kiss scenes, which must be especially difficult for anyone dating him. You know you'd have a hard time accepting it at least, the fact that your flawless actor boyfriend was off making out with equally beautiful co-stars on set, that is. Anyway, as your endorser, maybe you should try supporting his films a bit more. There had to be one that would catch your eye.
Curious, you open a new tab on your phone and search for him.
"Holy fuck," the curse leaves your lips the minute the search returns. Dozens of articles display on your phone screen at once, all covering South Korean actor Kim Taehyung's recent motorcycle accident. You checked the publishing date—six hours ago. “Taehyung’s in the hospital. He’s in the fucking hospital!”
Panicked, you leave your office to speak with your secretary.
“Ms. __,” Namjoon greets you immediately, a trace of hesitation in his tone upon seeing your frazzled state. “Is everything alright?”
“Joon,” you refer to him by his pet name, “Did you know that Taehyung’s in the hospital?”
“What?” He seems as shocked as you, his eyebrows shooting up in alarm.
“It happened this morning around eleven or something. It was a collision, a motorcycle accident. Oh god, he’s—he’s been taken to the ER,” you choke out the words, struggling to maintain your composure as you try recalling one of the articles you skimmed. “We have to go. I have to go right now.”
“I’m coming with you.” Namjoon leaps from his chair, grabbing his keys from his desk drawer. “I’ll drive.”
“No,” you stop him, “I don’t know how long this’ll be and you usually work until 5:30, so I don't want you to have to be stuck at the hospital with me. I want you to be able to call it an early night if you want. We'll take separate cars over.”
“Okay,” he nods. “I’ll meet you over there then?”
“Yeah.” You nod back, clutching your keys harder in your palm. “Yeah, sounds good.” You turn around to head for the nearest exit, but your secretary stops you mid-step.
“__,” he calls you by your name, having known you for the past decade permits him to do so. He softens his eyes when he sees the worry in your own clear as day. “He’s gonna be okay. We have to believe that. Please drive safe.”
“You too,” you say, then disappear from his sight.
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When you arrive, it’s a madhouse. Sirens blare as ambulances rush into the hospital parking lot, doctors and nurses race from room to room, and fans—so many fans—crowd outside, all waving signs of comfort and support.
“I'm here to see Kim Taehyung,” you say urgently to the charge nurse. She recognizes you immediately and throws you a look of distaste, but you’re too focused on the emergency at hand to care. “I’m sure you know who I am, but I need to see him. We work together, we're colleagues.”
“Ms. __,” she replies, surprisingly calm and collected amidst her obvious dislike of you. “I’m afraid he’s currently receiving serious medical attention and won’t be able to have any visitors at the moment.”
“I’ll wait,” you blurt out the words faster than you anticipate. You feel like you're eating your words from earlier about leaving him alone, but this is different—his life is on the line. "I can wait for him.”
“Visiting hours are only until 8 pm. I really don’t think—”
“Please,” you interrupt, your voice stern and urgent. “He's part of my team. He's my...friend. I have to know if he’s okay.”
The nurse hesitates, her expression softening slightly as she sees the genuine concern in your eyes. “Alright,” she finally says, her tone firm but kinder. “You can wait in the family lounge, but I can’t promise you’ll be able to see him anytime soon."
“Thank you,” you say, relief flooding through you. She directs you to a quiet room down the hall, away from the commotion where you're better able to calm your racing thoughts. You find a seat in the far corner immediately and send a quick text to Namjoon, letting him know where you are.
As you wait, the minutes drag by painfully slow. You can’t stop replaying the articles in your mind from earlier, the words “motorcycle accident” echoing like a mantra. How did this even happen? How bad was his condition? How much strain is this going to put on his acting career? You wish you knew.
A handful of nurses enter the lounge occasionally, calling out names and providing updates, but none of them are Taehyung’s. You find your ears burning every time the door opens, heart racing, only to sink back into your seat when it’s not about him.
Finally, you catch sight of Namjoon, his face mirroring your concern. He spots you immediately and rushes over, taking a seat in the chair beside you. “Any news?” he asks, his voice low and urgent.
“Not yet,” you reply, your voice barely above a whisper. “They said he’s receiving serious medical attention and don't know when we'll be able to see him. We have to leave by 8.”
Namjoon nods, his expression grim but unwavering “We’ll wait together.”
"If you need to leave sooner than—"
"I know," he interrupts. "I appreciate it, but please let me be here too."
You sit in silence from then on, exhaustion beginning to weigh heavy on both your shoulders. It's not until 7:35 when a doctor walks into the lounge, his tired eyes scan the room until they land on you and Namjoon.
“Are you here for Kim Taehyung?” he asks. "I'm Dr. Min."
You nod, your heart in your throat.
“He’s stable for now,” Dr. Min explains, “but he's still in critical condition. We’re doing everything we can.”
“Can we see him?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
He sighs. “Only for a few minutes. And you need to be prepared—he’s heavily sedated and has sustained significant injuries.”
“I understand,” you reply, mentally preparing yourself for what’s to come.
Dr. Min leads you through a maze of hallways until you reach the ICU. As you enter Taehyung’s room, the sight of him hooked up to machines and covered in bandages nearly breaks you. You take a deep breath and step closer, Namjoon right next to you.
“Taehyung,” you whisper, but he remains motionless, his breathing steady and rhythmic. The severity of his injuries is evident in the way he lies.
“We're here, Taehyung,” Namjoon continues, noticing your slightly frozen state. “We’re both here for you. Please, fight through this. You and I, we're good pals, remember? Like brothers. You have to—"
Although the more collected one before, Namjoon begins to struggle with his words. You place a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. Having known him for 10 years, you know that despite his strong exterior, he has one of the softest souls you know.
"I think I have to go, __. It'll be better if I see him when he's awake. I want to stay longer, but I just don't know if I can."
"I understand, we can't stay much longer anyway. Go home and get some rest. Dr. Min will call us when he's awake and able to talk."
After you give him a hug, Namjoon leaves the room, leaving you alone with Taehyung. You end up pulling up a chair beside his bed and slowly reach out to touch his hand. It's instinctive for you, the need to feel his heartbeat overpowering any other thought.
"I'm so sorry this happened to you, Taehyung," you start, your voice a mere murmur. "You'll push through this, right? Like in the movies you film. I confess I haven't seen any of them yet, but—but I will! That's how I found out about all this actually. We hadn't seen you for nearly two weeks, so I searched you up. Not in a weird way though, okay? Not like...anyway, I'm sorry I said no to you that day. When you asked to go for dinner, it threw me off. This whole thing with my ex-husband just has my mind in fifty million directions, so I promise it wasn't you. I hope you didn't think that."
"You've always seemed to show up for me, whether it's for the good of the company or even a little emotionally in some aspects. With the reputation I have these days, I'll always be grateful that you chose to work with me. You have a good heart, Taehyung, so much that I think if we ever got close, I think it might be unbearable for me," you pause, a couple of tears slipping down your face.
Just then, a creaking of the room's door momentarily pulls your attention away. Dr. Min stands a few feet away, clearing his throat—a gentle but firm signal that it's time for you to leave.
"I have to go soon, but I'll be back tomorrow, okay? Even if you're still asleep or not, I'll stop in and sit with you for a while because...because I need to be sure that you'll be alright. Namjoon will come see you too when he's ready. But I'll see you in the morning, alright Kim?"
You squeeze Taehyung's hand gently before heading out of the room, thanking the medical staff along the way.
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When you get home, the first thing you do is head straight for the bathroom. Your whole body feels riddled with stress and exhaustion, and you know that the only thing that can offer even the slightest amount of solace is the warmth of water.
Yet not four minutes after immersing yourself in your tub does your phone ring, demanding your attention. Being this late into the evening, you figure it has to be Jimin.
But you're wrong.
When you reach to answer the call, it's actually an unrecognizable number that's flashing on the screen. You hesitate for a moment, debating whether to answer or let it go to voicemail.
"Hello?" you answer cautiously, curiosity getting the best of you.
There's a brief pause on the other end before his voice comes through, words slightly muddled. "Hey, it's me," he says, his tone soft. "I've been...I've been thinking about my life, you know? About everything.
"J-Jungkook?" Your heart sinks as you quickly decipher the owner of the voice, but then it hardens. It's obvious from the slurring of his words that he's been drinking. "Why on earth are you calling me? And at this godforsaken hour too."
"I told you...I've been thinking about my life."
"I'm hanging up."
"No, please, stay on the line for five minutes. Please, I have to tell you...what I've been thinking."
"You have three minutes," you sigh, ready for anything (except what he was about to spring on you).
"I wanted to save my company," he continues, his voice wavering slightly. "For my mom's sake, you know? My dad owned it and stuff but she was the one who was behind all the technology...and that's why I married you. You...reminded me of her."
Your breath catches in your throat as he reveals the truth behind his actions, the raw honesty of his words hitting you like a punch to the gut. You knew very little of Jungkook's mother, too, as he didn't speak of her often.
"And then...then there's the real reason I divorced you," he admits, his voice breaking slightly. "My parents had a terrible marriage, you know? My mom...she had to manage my dad's temper for years...he didn't love her at all. He just married her because she was smart and could make him rich. It made her so unhappy, but you know she loved him so much. She...she passed away when I was 16, and...and I didn't want that for you. I didn't want you to be trapped like she was, because I'm like my dad you know? My feelings are...weird... I never know what the hell I'm...feeling. I'm probably not making a lot of sense am I?"
"I'm trying to understand." You want to hang up here and now but every time he speaks, you cant bring yourself to do it. The pain in his voice cuts through you like a knife, and it's a side of him that you've rarely seen before.
"I'm sorry," he whispers, his voice thick with regret. "I'm sorry for being such a dumbass that day I got my stuff. That was like, six months ago and I still hate myself for it. I shouldn't have made an advance on you like that. I was...I was immature, and I wasn't thinking."
"After the gala," he continues, his words becoming more coherent as he speaks. "I...I felt even more guilty, you know? Because, I still have a photo of you and Bam on my dresser. It's small, but I've tried to put it away over and over and over again, but I can't do it. I don't know what's wrong with me...it's almost a year since we lived under the same goddam roof and I can still smell your perfume, I can still remember how you laugh with both your lips and your eyes...the way you scrunch you nose when—"
"What are you trying to say Jungkook?" You interrupt. "That you're sorry and can't get me out of your head, so you need my forgiveness to move on?"
"No! That's...that's not it at all. I mean, I do want your forgiveness but—"
"Well, what the fuck is it?" You hate how aggressive your voice is sounding, but the obscene amount of incoherent information he's revealing to you is overwhelming. "It's 10 freaking pm at night, I had a long day, I'm sleep deprived, and Taehyung's in the fucking hospital which is so distressing, so I'm sorry, but I can't handle any more of your cryptic messages!"
"I think I might love you," he finally says, his voice raising as well. "I know I'm...I'm being a dumbass, but I...I think I love you. I love you __, fuck!"
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a/n: So....how are we feeling about Jungkook rn? Also, my darling Taehyung is taking one for the team here 😭 🤍 LMK what you think! Lastly, I understand the timeline of events is a bit tricky to follow, so if it helps I can put something in the series masterlist to help. Vote for jjk or kth!
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side note: I tried tagging readers in comments but most of them didn't go through, so i'm sorry about the clutter here...😬
no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton
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artbyblastweave · 1 day
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ask game; Victoria Dallon, aka Glory Girl aka Antares
I've always thought that Victoria's first appearance is quite the bit of deft needle-threading.
The thing about Interlude 2 is that Vicky is our first example of one of this setting's established heroes actively fighting crime- not just swooping in to vulture up the accomplishments of an up-and-comer- and a therefore a major goal of the sequence is to ensure that the audience comes away structurally unnerved by what counts as business as usual for the heroes, set the stage for the hurricane of ass-covering to come. So we have a sequence where she lords her power over a baseline criminal who has no realistic chance to fight back or get away, where she cripples and nearly kills him in a display of excessive force, where she uses her connections to other capes to duck out on the consequences of her excess once she realizes that she's crossed certain moral and optical Rubicons. All of this is gross, all of this speaks to an alarmingly cavalier attitude amongst even the most ostensibly accountable heroes. And from a protagonistic perspective, all of this serves to soften the blow of Taylor's actions at the bank in act three, because we're predisposed to see Vicky as an arrogant, overprivileged loose cannon who'd actually have a significantly higher body count than all of the Undersiders put together if not for the cushion afforded to her by her status as a superhero. A golden child up against the already put-upon underdog.
But. She also does all of that to a Neo-Nazi, who was fresh off committing a hate crime. I mean, if this was violence against a purse-snatcher, a drug-dealer- It would be very, very easy to block this sequence in a way that would set her up as a villain and nothing else for the rest of the work. In The Boys, for example, Homelander debuts by incinerating one bank robber's hand and throwing another a thousand feet into the air to land hard on a parked car, and the dissonance between that casual brutality and his chumminess with the onlookers is the thematic backbone for... basically the entire show, because he was in such total control of the situation that the only reason to do it that way is that he fundamentally doesn't care. In Super Crooks, it's made abundantly clear that the superheroes trying to arrest the titular supervillains are significantly more destructive to the city than the villains are, because their institutional backing removes any incentive to do anything but pursue the flashiest arrests possible for the sake of ratings. But Glory Girl? She's a sixteen year old putting her money where her mouth is on the unconsidered-dilettante suburban-left-ish tumblrite rallying cry of punching a Nazi. She's living out a near-boilerplate superheroic fantasy of righteous violence against an uncomplicatedly righteous target- likely a fantasy entertained at least once by the median cape fan, if we're being honest- and then, in the aftermath, blood on her hands and on the pavement, staring down the full weight of the prospect of actually having killed a person in an unconsidered spate of rage, is very much a panicked teenager about it, scrambling for a way to walk it back.
Which, independent of the specifics of whether this particular asshole had it coming, is the problematic element of this that generalizes- that superheroism in this world is a system that puts the social license to use concrete-shattering power in the hands of a kid with the judgement and attitude of someone scheming up ways to dodge curfew. She's done this before, she's gonna keep doing this, she's gonna keep being two-faced about it with her public-facing golden-girl image. But she wasn't wrong to be angry. And the fact that this is the kind of thing she gets angry about is hard to separate from later beats where she tries to do right by people, hard to separate from her willingness to put herself on the line against Endbringers and the Slaughterhouse 9. It's a bad situation, a horrible system that's guaranteed to incentivize bad behavior, they shouldn't be assigning any of this shit to a 17-year-old. But later on, when things go south for her, the seeds are planted so that she can retain audience sympathy in a way that she likely wouldn't be able to if this story was a banal hatswap, with unfairly maligned "villains" who do no real wrong against supervillains who happen to call themselves superheroes.
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itiswhatitisboi · 23 hours
Text
Golden Years.
synopsis: thinking back on being teammates with kate after she gets drafted, considering them the golden years — and regretting not doing anything about your feelings for her and thinking it’s just too late
warning(s): nothing except good ole’ angst
pairing (s): kate martin x iowa!reader
a/n: first time writing a fic and i kinda blacked out bc this is a doozy
the night your best friends got drafted had to be one of the best nights of your life. you, jada, gabbie and kate had gone to support caitlin and while you, of course, had deep down hoped that a certain blonde would get picked — it was still such a shock when her name got called from the audience. you all got to cheer her on as she walked up to a jersey that would hopefully have her name on the back.
it had ended in a night of celebration, the alcohol making you extra flirty, and kate extra touchy. a dangerous combo considering the feelings you had for. the same feelings you had downplayed for the past two years because this was kate. your captain, your teammate, one of your best friends at iowa.
“i can’t believe you got drafted tonight,” you had hiccuped into her ear with her arm dangling lazily around you as you sat in the booth next to her. the feel of her touch against you had caused you to tune all other conversation out, your attention solely her’s.
she had chuckled and you had felt her body rumble against you, “las vegas here i come.”
“i knew you could do it.” it had been such a light-hearted comment but if only kate knew the weight behind it. ever since she had introduced herself to you your freshman year at iowa, officially welcoming you to the team, it had been an instant connection. one that had grown into a powerful friendship until it eventually left you wanting something more. seeing the type of person she was, you fell for her smile, her kind heart, her laugh, the compassion she had so much of to give, her obsession with hot sauce — all of her. she had become the most attractive person to you and she was all you ever wanted. so when it came to pursuing her dreams, which she had very little vocalized, you were her biggest cheerleader and number one supporter. you always claimed she deserved more recognition, to which she would brush your words off with a bashful laugh, ducking her head humbly.
“i take it you knew i’d get drafted tonight then?” she had teased with you, nudging you with her body.
“without a doubt. they’re lucky to have you, you know that? you deserve this and so much more.”
she had beamed at you and pressed a tender kiss to your temple as thank you. you had no idea but it had take everything in her not to kiss you on the lips right then and there, your words being everything she had longed to ever hear. yes, her family was always proud of her but hearing praises from you just mattered so much more.
but following the draft you had gotten back and were instantly swamped with schoolwork, practically drowning in it. and kate had gotten so busy with packing up her life in iowa. you two had barely seen each other.
one morning you had been sitting at your desk, glaring at the notes that stared back up at you. your mind had naturally wandered to who you always thought about, which was kate. you found yourself dwelling on the seasons you’ve had during the years you had to play together. after that first year you had become an unstoppable duo, elevating the game in such a way that was noticeable to everyone around you, encouraging your teammates to be the best they could be, and overall improving the team. kate may have been the captain but you were damn near equally as important — bluder always liked to call kate the head and you the heart of the team. you both just worked like that.
and as your mind lingered on the thought of kate, you realized that you’d never get that chance to play with her again. that you’d never be out there on the same court with her, chest-bumping her after a crucial block, or giving her a high five following a beautiful three-pointer. you both would never wear the same uniform again. never be teammates again.
and then a horrible thought crossed your mind as you thought about how kate would be finishing her chapter there— would you two remain in each other’s lives?
maybe that was how you found yourself outside her apartment door that morning, knowing she was leaving for good later that day. leaving you behind as she started a new life. your hand hovered in the air until you forced yourself to knock, knowing that the worst that could happen was that you lost touch after she moved and you stayed acquaintances. as long as she’d be in your life, no matter how distant, you’d be able to manage. but one thing was for certain, you wouldn’t be able to handle not saying goodbye.
she opened the door shortly after you knocked softly. her hair was slightly disheveled in a way that made you think she’d been rushing around all morning until just then.
“hey, can i come in?”
kate blinked, as if surprised you were standing right there in front of her before she snapped out of it and stepped aside. “of course.”
the apartment felt like a ghost town the moment you stepped over its threshold. no pictures on the fridge, no display of hot sauces above a the cabinets, nothing.
“what’s up? i thought we said i’d stop by your’s before i left.”
you faced her and watched as she scratched at her brow like the was trying to rid herself of the slight confusion that nestled between her brows. “yeah i know- we did. i just.. i don’t know, i needed to see you.”
kate nodded slowly as you licked your lips, suddenly unsure of what to say. you hadn’t even intended to come here because you knew it’d make you too emotional, that was why you had made the plans to meet up in the first place.
“i guess it’s just really hit me that you’re gonna be across the world and i’m gonna miss you.”
“i’m gonna miss you too,” she smiles softly as she stuffed her hands in her pockets.
“no like, i don’t think you get it- i’m gonna miss you a lot. like really miss you.” you began to fidget with her hands as your heart began to beat loudly inside your chest.
you saw the confusion yet appreciation wash across her face. she was definitely confused on why you were so adamant that she didn’t understand where you were coming from. realistically though, she didn’t want to overthink your words because there was no way you returned the same feelings she had for you— right?
“i mean, how am i supposed to go about my day without my favorite person by my side? instead you’re a call away and if i want to see you i have to catch a flight- which they’re so pricy, what is up with that?” you felt yourself begin to ramble and you honestly had no idea why. you just felt like spilling your guts to her and you had no clue if you were going to stop or not.
“what are you saying,” she said softly. she walked closer to you so that she could place a gentle hand on your shoulder, in efforts to comfort you. it hurt late to see you so antsy and she had no idea her move would have so much of an impact on you. “we can call, facetime, text— whatever it is, we can talk as much as you want? okay?”
“it’s not okay— i just want to be with you,” you confessed, the words slipping from your lips without even giving it too much of a second thought. you watch kate’s eyes widen at your words but there was no going back now. “fuck it. kate, i want to be with you. like with you, with you.”
unknowingly to you, that was the best news kate had heard in a long time. hell, it might even beat the draft because hearing what you wanted was the same as what she wanted? nothing could be better.
“i have feelings for you, and i have for a while now.” you confessed. “and it’s okay if you don’t feel the same, but jesus— i think i was gonna go crazy if you left without at least knowing how i felt.”
you studied kate’s face as she said nothing, simply looking at you. you wondered if you broke her before wondering if you should just leave before you dealt with the embarrassment— or dealt with the reality of losing her friendship over this. fuck, maybe you should’ve watched your damn mouth.
but kate crossing the room and crashing her lips onto yours caught you by surprise and had you staggering back slightly. her hands came to cup your face as she bent down to you. she pulled you as close to her as possible as you came to your senses and wrapped your arms around her neck. you relished in this new feeling, a touch undiscovered as her lips moved against your own.
when you both finally pulled away, breathless, you both wore the brightest smiles on your faces.
kate’s breath fanned your face as she let out an airy laugh. you could’ve sworn she even had a smirk on her face, “who said i didn’t have feelings for you too?”
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leandra-winchester · 3 days
Text
On Oliver's social media behavior regarding Bucktommy vs. Buddie
Kind of in line with many of the good points raised by @bbbuckaroo in this ask response, but I wanted to make my own post about it.
I, too, have seen posts that prompted this ask - from more well-meaning people remarking that Oliver could/should maybe say something against the toxic Buddie shippers and promote Bucktommy more, to more critical voices saying he's essentially ship-baiting with Buddie because he keeps posting about them.
As the referenced post says, Oliver "knows how important and pivotal the Buddie FRIENDSHIP is".
So let's look at that from Oliver's (and in connection also Ryan's) point of view for a moment here.
You're an actor who's been playing one half of what is one of the most integral relationships on a very successful show. That relationship has textually always been a friendship, but with elements that make it richer and deeper than most regular friendships; it's a sort of family dynamic.
It could be read as having a potential for romance, and you're open to that, should the writers ever decide that's the direction they want to take it. You have said so multiple times, not just to appease a large group of fans, but because you genuinely mean it. You're open to it, but you don't know if it's ever going to happen, nor do you have any power over it.
You do love the way fans are celebrating this relationship though - whether they highlight the canonical platonic aspects or take it a step further. You "love the love" (as Ryan has put it). It's great, it's heartwarming, it's moving because the potential of that romance and your character figuring out he's bisexual means so much to queer fans who are looking for good queer representation (which your show already has, but there could always be a bit more, right?). You see and want to acknowledge all the creativity people pour into it.
But you're careful after a while, because, so far, that relationship has only textually been platonic, and some fans are accusing both the writers and you of queerbaiting.
So you take a step back, do less social media for a while. You don't want them to think you're confirming anything just because you see value in certain fictional interpretations of the text.
But then you are told that your character is supposed to come out as bisexual; he'll have a romance with a background character they're bringing back for a couple of episodes. While that's not exactly the relationship many of the fans hoped to get, it's still amazing. It's the right representation of bisexual characters that is very rarely done right, and it'll confirm that they always read your character correctly as bisexual. It'll be so validating to the fans to know they didn't misinterpret that, and you're very happy about that.
But you still love the family-like, platonic relationship you've built with the other character for 5 whole seasons before this. And you love the relationship your character has with his son, too. (In a way, Buck is to Christopher what Bobby is to Buck - a father figure).
You want to keep celebrating that because your new romantic relationship doesn't replace the year-long friendship with Eddie. You want to show fans that 'hey, even though this isn't exactly what you hoped for, it's still great; it's important. Eddie and Chris are still and always will be a huge part of Buck's life. Don't worry. Buck will not abandon them. I still see you and acknowledge you, but let's focus on the textual friendship and platonic love here. Which is also very, very important, and very dear to me personally."
And there isn't that much to share about a romantic relationship that's just begun yet anyway, especially with the season being so short and packed with multiple story arcs around the main characters. It's all still at the start, and while it's great, exciting and has the potential to become something lasting, nothing's set in stone yet. You probably also don't want to have people get their hopes up that Bucktommy is 'confirmed' as endgame; and you don't want to put a main character who has his own, very complex story arc going on this season on the backburner.
You've obviously 'done it wrong'. But no matter how else you could have done it, it would have been wrong as well. You probably know this by now, because no matter what you did in the past, there were always people who interpreted your actions and words in bad faith to confirm their own agenda.
So what the hell are you supposed to do other than what feels good to you while applying a little bit of caution?
---
Oliver CANNOT get it right. It's simply impossible. If he didn't post at all, some fans would be mad that he doesn't say anything. If he only or primarily promoted Bucktommy, they'd be mad that he ignores Eddie and Chris entirely. If he only promoted Buddie (platonic) and Chris, they'd be mad that he's ship baiting. And if he goes for the balance of putting his character's 6-year history with Eddie+Chris and the newly developing romance with Tommy in perspective, i.e. what he's doing right now, they're still mad.
In any potential scenario, the loud and obnoxiously entitled portion of the fandom would find a reason to criticize. It really does not matter what he does.
So, where does that leave us? Personally, I'd say leave the man alone. Let him post and say what he feels is best, and don't try to look at it under any 'bad faith' lens. He's probably given it sufficient thought and does what he thinks is best and feels right.
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nikethestatue · 1 day
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Having been in this fandom for a long time, I think what's become apparent--and I think that's where most of our problems stem from--is that PERSONAL INTERPRETATION has become the default thing to fall back onto, and consequently, it's been used over and over again to negate or disregard the author's INTENT, because it doesn't align with personal preference. Consequently, people began being duped into believing that a reader's personal interpretation of text is 'right' and that canon doesn't matter and that SJM's own intention don't matter as well.
Here are some examples:
Did SJM INTENDED for Cassian to be a terrible mate who will sell Nesta for a chicken nugget if Rhys tells him to? Was the intent to show how poor Nessian pairing is?
OR
Is it just that Cassian did not live up to the readers' own expectations of what they wanted for Nesta? And is their interpretation of Cassian as an awful match for Nesta, who doesn't care about her, only cares about sex, and would never stand up for her or support her, actually correct?
Did SJM INTENDED for Gwyn's scenes in ACOSF to be romantic towards Azriel? Was her cutting the ribbon or climbing or running a prelude to the great Gwynriel romance novel?
OR
Is it that Gwyn was created to be a springboard for Nesta's self-discovery and healing? Someone who accepted, supported and encouraged Nesta when Nesta was at her lowest? And did many readers' animosity towards Elain's characters drove them to willfully interpret absolutely non-romantic scenes as romantic in a futile hope that somehow, their personal wants would translate to page?
Did SJM intended for Rhys and Feyre to be viewed as ignorant despots who hate their own people, only care about wealth and power, and don't give a damn about anyone but themselves and their five houses?
OR
Is Rhys's love for Feyre the driving force behind many of his decisions? for example giving her an extravagant house? Does Rhys really want to trample on everyone's rights, or is he allowing some of his subjects the freedom of autonomy and self-actualization? Is the intent to show that he is a thoughtful and imperfect leader, who cares about the welfare of his people, or is that he is a dictator who gave his lover an empty title?
While SJM's execution of certain topics isn't perfect, I think that wilful ignorance and the desire to see something that isn't there, and something that SJM didn't intended at all, is really the cause of all the shipwars and the IC hate.
Is SJM REALLY in love with Lucien and is excited to write his book, or is that the fantasy of his stans? Whereas SJM's never been particularly complimentary towards Lucien and his character in interviews or in canon?
Will Tamlin's elusive 'redemption arc' REALLY be something that SJM is interested in writing? Or her calling him a 'douchebag' is kind of indicative of her feelings towards him?
"Elriels are obsessed with canon'. We heard this again and again and again. Being obsessed with canon' simply means that we are paying attention to what SJM's intentions are and what she wants to convey through her words. Elriels, just like everyone else have headcanons about Elain, and Az, and Elriel. But we don't discard the actual books and writing in favour of our headcanons.
I feel that lack of consideration towards 'intent' is really leading some people down a very slippery road, where at the end of it, they'll find a lot of crushed dreams. Because most of the time, 'black' is just....black. It's not white. It's not even opaque. It's just, black. I think people should remember that when they do their 'analysis'.
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loriache · 1 day
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honestly i'm kind of interested in the idea of laios in an arranged marriage. because obviously straight-up inherited monarchies are ...bad, to say the least! but it's what the characters are familiar with (even laios' father's extremely local, extremely minor leadership role is inherited, presumably through the male line). and it isn't just about what they think the best way to run melini is; in terms of ensuring that the other longed-lived nations respect melini's continued sovereignty, having it passed down in a manner that's close enough to their own ways for them to understand it and respect it is important. And it seems like most of the other nations have leadership through inheritance - thought that isn't confirmed for certain except with the elves.
Also, a marriage carries the potential to establish foreign allies - something melini is certainly lacking. A marriage could come with resources they'll badly need, treaties of mutual defence, money, legitimacy and political capital... not that these things can't be worked around, but if laios isn't strongly opposed, there are a lot of advantages! and i don't think he would be, because that's the framework for marriage (conferring practical advantages, building intracommunity relationships and providing a partner to do important work that he can't do) that he had grown up with. he isn't exactly a romantic and I doubt he's holding out for any sort of relationship of that nature.
Like, I don't think it's impossible that they would go with this path, because it's the most obvious and it carries a lot of advantages and it's what almost all the decision-making characters would consider normal and not objectionable. and it could be so interesting.
I think Laios would have major hangups if expected (i.e., by Marcille) to establish a genuine, romantic interest in a woman. Whether because of his sexual or romantic orientation, or just his own deep-seated trauma about rejection and being inherently disgusting and scary. And I think he'd hate the idea of having kids, too, and be very frightened of being like his father. But I don't think he'd refuse on that basis; he could cope with a marriage contract, with clearly laid-out expectations and responsibilities. And when it came to having a kid, I think he'd be reluctant to express that he doesn't want to do it, because he isn't naive and he understood when he agreed to be king it would carry responsibilities like this. It's clear from his nightmare that he already felt pressure from his parents to have children, probably magnified by the fact his father has got a position, responsibilities and wealth to pass on. Obviously he isn't a perfect martyr, so he might struggle when it comes to actually going through with it - but I don't think he'd actually, outright refuse. I think he might do it even though he doesn't want to, and I think that could be really messy in a way that appeals to me.
I don't know, there's something about negotiating these kinds of complicated situations that's interesting to me. and i love a platonic marriage. If they find a woman who has an interest in education, for example, and can work with marcille on setting up schools and universities. she'd ideally be politically savvy enough to be an able partner to laios: even though kabru can and would continue to do a lot of that, there are different spheres that a queen and a prime minister can work within!
how would their relationship work? maybe she finds laios' perspective on the world, and his frankness, unexpectedly liberating after an extremely controlled, cloistered upbringing. maybe she had a rebellious phase, has magic, or something else which makes her a relatively unpopular candidate for marriage - even as melini grows in power, i doubt that they'd be getting offers for the cream of the crop in terms of perceived value on the marriage market, because laios' relationship is a bit too ambivalent/monstrous for that, and melini too new. maybe she's a widow! an older woman, wouldn't that be cool - though they'd want her young enough that she could definitely still have kids.
certainly i think he'd be happy for her to pursue other relationships, though ideally in a manner that couldn't produce illegitimate kids. with other relationships in play, that's even more interesting. like, both kabru and toshiro have complicated emotions relating to infidelity. i think kabru would actually find it quite cathartic to be in the kind of high-status environment that rejected his mother for perceived infidelity, pursuing an affair that all parties consent to, though he'd likely be incredibly aware of the public image - since "image" is what he was rejected for. toshiro... i just really really love the way he'd feel about being the "other woman" in laios' marriage, considering his feelings about his father and maizuru. especially given how much closer he is to maizuru than his mother, being in her position...! his emotions would be so complex, it's incredibly tasty. i bet he'd make a bunch of assumptions about how laios' wife feels about it and be totally wrong, and that's so interesting. also, i think laios' wife should fuck marcille (she and falin have an open relationship).
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room-surprise · 6 hours
Text
Izutsumi's name, meaning and cultural references
This is an excerpt from Chapter 6 of my Dungeon Meshi essay, "Real World Cultural and Linguistic Influences in Delicious in Dungeon"
IZUTSUMI
(Japanese Pronunciation: Idzutsumi)
(Spoilers for the entire manga and post-manga materials!)
Izutsumi (イヅツミ) is a beast-man created by attaching a human soul to a monster cat, which is why she won’t ever be able to “turn back” into a human: she was never human to begin with. We don’t know what Izutsumi’s birth name was, if she even had one. The human that was killed was probably a baby or young child, since they don’t seem to have any memories of their mother, so they may not have ever been named.
We know that Izutsumi is from a different, larger island in the Eastern Archipelago to the northeast of Wa Island, however we do not know if this is the origin point of her human half, her monster cat half, both, or if this is just where she was made.
We do know that when she saw an illusion of what she thought was her human soul’s mother, the illusion was wearing something similar to North or Central Asian clothing, not Japanese clothing, so the island Izutsumi comes from is probably not culturally Japanese like Wa Island.
PLANT: ASEBI
Izutusmi’s code name as a ninja is Asebi (アセビ), which is the Japanese name for Japanese andromeda (pieris japonica), a type of shrub. The kanji for this plant’s name is 馬酔木 and it literally means “horse intoxicating tree” because it was known to be toxic to horses and make their legs go numb. A code name like this could imply a rude sentiment like “you’re so unpleasant, just being near you makes horses sick.” Considering the hostile relationship Izutsumi has with the Nakamoto clan, this code name makes a lot of sense.
IZUTSUMI THE FAMILY NAME
Izutsumi (井堤) is a common family name in central Japan, especially Kanagawa Prefecture. It is historically affiliated with the Tachibana (橘氏) clan, which was one of the four most powerful kuge (court nobility) families in Japan's Nara and early Heian periods.
The Tachibana clan’s founder was Inukai Michiyo (犬養 三千代) whose name was changed to Tachibana Michiyo by Empress Genmei. Michiyo was a court lady of the early Nara period and mother of Empress Kōmyō.
The family name Inukai (犬養) literally means to own or keep a dog, but the character for dog historically refers not only to dogs, but to any four-legged animal, especially those that are ancient or magical.
Over the course of the 9th and 10th centuries, the Tachibana clan’s rivals pushed the Tachibana out of power, and the clan was scattered across the country. I’m not certain, but it sounds to me like “Inukai” as a family name describes a profession, in this case, someone who is in charge of keeping four-legged beasts of all kinds. In the world of Dungeon Meshi, maybe this name implies they are a professional monster keeper, or monster trainer.
Though it’s a somewhat tenuous connection, the idea that Izutsumi’s human half might have been a stolen child from the Tachibana/Inukai family, which tames monsters, is very interesting! Another possibility is that the Tachibana/Inukai family were the ones that provided the monster cat used for making Izutsumi. Perhaps they were experimenting with making beast-kin soldiers in an attempt to fight back against their rival kuge clans.
IZU-TSUMI
Let’s break down the name Izutsumi into its sound components and what they might mean.
TSUMI
The primary meaning for tsumi is 罪, a Japanese word that indicates the violation of legal, social or religious rules, so you could translate it as sin, abomination, or a crime against god and humanity.
In Ancient Japan the word usually implied that a divine punishment was occuring, and something that was tsumi would therefore carry disease, be polluted and unclean, suffer from disasters, or be ugly and unsightly.
Considering the way people of the Eastern Archipelago discriminate against all races that aren’t tall-men, and the way the Nakamotos make Izutsumi cover her body and face up completely, I think Kui probably meant for Izutsumi’s name to convey this meaning.
However, although the negative connotation is the most common, tsumi can also be a name, or part of a name (Tsumigiwa, Tsumiki, Tsumio, Tsumire, etc.) which makes it sound natural when used in Izutsumi’s name.
It can also refer to the Japanese sparrowhawk, Chinese mulberry, a spindle, a whelk, a child's wooden building blocks, to accumulate (bricks, like a wall, or savings, like money), to build a reputation or gain experience, atonement (for sin), to pluck, to load with cargo, or to send away.
These meanings are interesting, since they suggest that Izutsumi is “sent away” by Toshiro when he lets her go, and by joining Laios’ party she is gaining life experience, building herself up (like a wall, like a child with toy blocks), and becoming a more mature person, moving past her old identity of being a sinful mistake. Through the course of the manga she learns to accept herself as she is, and eventually discovers that there was nothing to “fix”, she cannot become a full human, because she wasn’t one to begin with.
IZU THE PERSONAL NAME
Izu is either a girl’s name, or a component of several Japanese names for any gender (Izumi, Izuko, Izuchi, etc), so putting together Izu+tsumi creates a compound that sounds like a Japanese personal name, though I have found no evidence of it as an existing personal name.
IZU THE PLACE
Many names reference where a person or their family are from, so it’s possible that Izutsumi (or her family, or the magicians who made her a beast-man) are from a place called Izu.
Izu (伊豆) is the historic name of a province which is now part of the Shizuoka Prefecture, which is to the west of Tokyo. This area is the Izu peninsula, a large mountainous area, and it contains Izu city, and nearby is the Izu island chain.
Many of the Izu islands are and have been uninhabited, however a few of the islands do have small populations, and Jomon and Yayoi ruins have been found on several of them, indicating that the ancestors of modern Japanese people once lived in these places. I was unable to find any information about whether any other ethnic groups have specifically lived on these islands.
During the Tokugawa shogunate (one of the primary eras that Dungeon Meshi’s Wa Island resembles), the Japanese court frequently sent nobility into exile in the Izu islands because the region was far away from the capital, and it was considered an unlucky and bad place to be. It’s unclear if the Izu islands already had this reputation before they became a place of exile, or if the negative reputation was caused by its use as a prison. There is some indication that the Izu islands were somehow seen as ritually unclean or dangerous.
Eventually the criteria for banishment was broadened and the islands became penal colonies, where people were sent for murder, theft, arson, brawling, gambling, fraud, jailbreak, rape, and belonging to illegal religions (Christianity). Criminals exiled to the island were never told the length of their sentences, and the history of the island is filled with foiled escape attempts.
Not only were the islands used as a prison to keep politically dangerous people away from Kyoto, they also held an important religious role as a barrier between the supposed purity of the central court in Kyoto and the unclean dangers beyond the borders of Japan.
The islands were the first line of magical defense against the dangers that threatened Japan, and the ritual experts, a type of shaman called an urabe, practiced a special kind of turtle-shell divination in Izu.
It’s possible that Izutsumi’s human soul came from the Izu region. Izutsumi’s human part could have been a native of the Izu mainland, an Izu islander, or the child of a prisoner. No matter which one it is, being from Izu would make Izutsumi very low-ranking and unimportant, which would make her human half a perfect target for someone trying to find a baby or child that they could sacrifice to make a beast-man.
It’s also possible that the magician that made Izutsumi lived and worked in Izu, since it’s a place that had magical and ritual significance, was seen as a place of pollution and danger where such “unclean” work could be done, and where there is a ready supply of unwanted human beings (prisoners, islanders and their kin) available to be used as raw materials.
Perhaps they made many beast-men, and so since “tsumi” means abomination, perhaps the name Izutsumi simply means “abomination made in Izu.”
IZU THE VERB
Izu (出ず “dezu”) is also an archaic verb used by the lower-class that can mean a great variety of things, though there does seem to be some common ideas being expressed through all of them. Here are the ones that I think apply the most to Izutsumi:
Doesn’t come out (She’s been hidden in her ninja clothes for a long time.)
To leave on a journey, to depart, to move forward (She leaves her old life behind.)
To appear, to emerge, to be discovered (She surprises Laios’ party and then joins them.)
To be exposed, exhibited, displayed (She grew up displayed in freak shows.)
To sell (She was sold by many people.)
To exceed, to go over (Her behavior is often seen as rude and “too much.”)
To stick out, protrude (Her ears stick out, giving her identity as a beast-man away.) To come from, to be derived from (She “comes from” tsumi, she was created by an abominable act.)
To assume an attitude, to behave in a manner (She behaves like tsumi, an abomination, uncivilized.)
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starbeamssovereign · 3 days
Note
This request is going to be a little different from the others so if you don't want to do it you can delete this.
Can I request a ancient mafia boss AU Headcanon? and if you want can you make it the top one the least dangerous and the bottom being the most dangerous type of mafia boss.
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Mafia Boss AU: The Ancients
Summary: The Five mafia bosses have chosen to disclose very personal details about themself. All of them are documented and stored in five separate case files. Well, shall we read them together?
TW: Murder ✨, Poison, Blackmailing, and some other stuff. If you can handle the stuff above, you can certainly handle the rest of it <3
I HAVE NEVER DONE STUFF LIKE THIS BEFORE. BE WARNED 😭
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File #1: The Sky Syndicate
Boss: Pure Vanilla
Going by the nickname “Pure Vanilla”, or “P.V.”
He’s known to be very social and surprisingly kind, even to the point of being called naive for a mafia boss.
However, much is going on behind those eyes. His mechanical staff almost looks…alive, in a way, blinking and glancing around. As if looking for a traitor in its midst.
Despite his kindness, Pure Vanilla is known to be quite intelligent, and his truth can be quite harsh. Especially to those who declare that they’re his enemy.
The look of shock on someone’s face when Pure Vanilla comes face to face with them, smiling all giddy and joyful as he lists down everything that they’ve done to betray the syndicate is…exhilarating to him.
And how does he deal with them? Well, by forcing the traitor into a bright, almost blinding room and sending in his subordinate, Strawberry Crepe to…disassemble them.
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File #2: Silent Petal Society
Boss: White Lily
They’re a very secretive organization, known for its eagerness to test out the resilience of their members and how their minds work.
White Lily, known to be distant yet intelligent and kind to her subordinates is quite brutal to her enemies, attacking them with no mercy. Just ask a certain jester-looking freak about what she did to him and you’ll get your answer.
She deals with sciences and often sends her members out to smuggle more information and items for the sake of research.
She may have some other side to her, as she was sometimes reported to be cackling her heart out in a room with a bright red hue…but that was just normal, wasn’t it?
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File #3: Scarlet Nexus
Boss: Hollyberry
This group is known for its brute strength and love for alcohol. In fact, their group mostly focuses on smuggling said items to their headquarters, where their boss Hollyberry is.
She’s the only one who uses her name, while the rest go by their nicknames. She personally thinks that it’s a power move and that her strength outweighs their intelligence in multiple ways. She didn’t specify how though.
Her group is much more out in the open, but who could really stop such powerful yet swift people? Most, if not all of them are loud and boisterous, both confident in their ability to evade the police and strong enough to fight them if ever caught.
Hollyberry is even in a sort of alliance with a Dragon — one of the five most powerful members in a terrorist organization.
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File #4: The Black Citadel
Boss: Dark Cacao
Pussy
Dark Cacao is the most secure and secretive of the bunch. His headquarters is somewhere up in a mountain, yet nobody really knows where. He has his own business by fortifying his borders with technology to make sure nobody goes in, and very few come out.
He may be the most strongest, but he doesn’t plan to show it anytime soon. Otherwise there would be a bit of a bloodbath happening sooner or later.
His three executives, going by the nicknames Affogato, Caramel Arrow, and Crunchy Chip are different in their own ways.
Affogato deals with finding traitors on the inside and creating more poisons and psychological weapons against any enemies who dare wish to harm the boss. In fact, he may be the closest to Dark Cacao for some reason…perhaps he has other goals?
Crunchy Chip works as a guard with his group, known for controlling and training many dangerous wolves. Not much else is known. Perhaps later these files may be updated.
Caramel Arrow leads a group called the Watchers. They’re known for scouting out their enemies. They also work to help trade in materials and weapons. She’s quite loyal to Dark Cacao, even though she was close to getting demoted and eliminated due to a certain meddling of another executive…
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File #5: The Golden Circuit
Boss: Golden Cheese
She’s very flamboyant and tech-savvy, and so is her group. They’re well-known and very popular among criminal organizations of all kind.
Golden Cheese loves glittering gold, sending out her subordinates to get any jewelry that gleams and shimmers like her oh-so precious gold.
The Golden Circuit specializes in high-tech surveillance systems and technological innovation, especially with weapons. This group knows everything and everyone that even speaks to one of their members.
So yes, they are known to blackmail quite often.
And any enemies don’t stand a chance due to Golden Cheese being active in her job as a boss, even killing tens of people with some of her high-tech golden spears, able to track any source of heat and follow it.
All of her subordinates are light on their feet, and some even use mechanical wings like hers to fly around so quietly.
She’s probably the one who designed Pure Vanilla’s mechanical eye staff anyways…
GUYS PLEASE I DONT KNOW WHAT I DID
PLEASE DON’T JUDGE ME 😭
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1tsteatime · 2 days
Text
REFERENCE TO JON AND MARTIN IN EPISODE 17
RIGHT HELLO I NEED TO KNOW I'M NOT CRAZY HERE.
I loved episode 17, and this isn't even to talk about the VERY interesting details to do with Celia at the start, and the jmj error at the end (trust me, those are whole crates of worms to be opened), but this post in particular is about a very quick, very sly detail at the start of the statement.
Allow me, if you will, to quote directly from the transcript:
"Anyway, there was a new receptionist behind the old front desk, some big, soft-looking guy who stumbled over every word. A year ago, it would probably have wound me right up, but what can I say? Therapy works.
There was another patient too, some bookish-looking guy with serious city miles. I used to play the game “what are you in for,” where I would pass the time guessing… well. You know. In my head he was definitely some kind of weird pervert, really into stroking orchids or something."
PLEASE TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE HEARING SEASON 1 JON AND MARTIN? Let's check the list:
Big, soft looking guy: that runs true with every canon description we've heard about Martin, not to mention ALL the fanart. Not to conflate fanon with canon, but here it's pretty cut and dry. Besides, 'stumbled over every word'? Now that is Martin to a tee, particularly in season 1.
Bookish-looking guy: oh, it's not like we know a certain stuffy archivist who is known for saying 'good lord' and describing merry-go-rounds as 'thrilling'. Again, I'm not saying those are the same thing but COME ON. The next bit is also interesting: 'serious city miles'. That can refer to someone who looks rough due to life incidents or substance use, and we do know that Jon is a smoker. The stroking orchids bit I have no clue about, likely just a funny line.
Their roles in this cameo are interesting as well; Martin as a receptionist and Jon as a patient. Besides thinking of a dozen fanfic AUs that would leap from this topic, it sort of reverses the power dynamic? Well, not exactly, but the roles do make sense given what we know about them: Martin being very caring and compassionate, but not the most qualified, and Jon's mental state being...less than stellar, this totally checks out.
Now, I'm not banking any firm theories on this; honestly I think we're still too early in the podcast to have a semblance of the 'real' plot, but if this is foreshadowing instead of just a cute nod to the characters, here is the proposal I'll make:
What if the dimension shifting didn't happen perfectly? This episode already deals with identity, and body vs mind vs soul. What if that is Jon and Martin's actual bodies, but their souls got separated? Now these incorporeal souls need a host...maybe an old computer database? What if those 'city miles' weren't just any old marks, but worm holes, desolation burns, our Jon's scars and wounds. What if their bodies have forgotten what happened to them?
There is a good chance that this goes totally nowhere. Still though, I'm calling it early. So excited to see where this all goes!
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mothwingwritings · 2 days
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Animal Magnetism
F!Reader X Yujiro Hanma (Omegaverse AU)
Well folks, here is my first ever attempt at a true Omegaverse fic. I wanted to start out with something little to get a feel for it, but since I don’t know how to chill it ended up being a bit longer than anticipated. ^^; I’m still getting the hang of it all, but I hope you enjoy it regardless! Thank you so much for reading!!!
Also, I have a rather busy end of May-June coming up, so I’m not sure how much I will be able to write and update during that time. I apologize in advance. That being said, I wrote this pretty fast and edited it even faster so that I could get it out before I get swamped, so I apologize if it reads a bit rushed. (シ_ _)シ
THIS FIC IS NSFW, SO 18+ ONLY PLEASE!!!
WARNINGS: Noncon/dubcon, yandere vibes, ABO/Omegaverse AU (reader is the omega ofc), death, strangulation, brief mentions of stalking, reader is degraded and treated like an object by Yujiro Hanma. You know how it is. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯"
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You considered yourself lucky to have found the love of your life.
That wasn’t always the case for Omegas. Since your childhood, you’d heard countless horror stories from your parents and friends, tragedies and cautionary tales of the horrors Omega’s faced when looking for a mate. Many of your kind faced dismal futures as breeding factories or were forgotten and neglected by their partners whenever they weren’t in heat. It was a lonely, painful, and unfulfilling existence, but a sad reality that many Omega’s endured nonetheless.
Because of this your parents sheltered you, doing their best to keep you from the cruel power imbalance of the outside world. Your father made sure he was the only alpha allowed near you on the property, the rest of your friends and acquaintances consisting of either other Omega’s or Beta’s. Not that you much minded, after all the negativity you heard surrounding Alpha’s you figured this was for the best. You weren’t missing out on anything, and as long as you took your suppressors accordingly, you were sure you could live out the rest of your life just fine without Alpha influence and still feel completely fulfilled.
That was to say, until a certain bodyguard was hired as the family escort, specifically YOUR escort. You had heard he was an Alpha and were quite shocked that your father would allow such a person so close to you, especially with all his previous warnings. But as time passed and your curiosity grew, you would eventually introduce yourself to the man of your own accord, excited and nervous to see what manner of individual he truly was. At the time, you would have never ended up guessing that one meeting would end up turning your entire world on its head, bringing more joy to your life than you could have ever imagined.
You were smitten the moment your hands joined in the initial shake, taken in by his easy smile and sparkling eyes. He had respectfully kept his distance from you at your father’s request, but you could tell he was elated to finally speak with you, a small blush gracing his cheeks as soon as you said ‘hello’. He was a kindly man, mild mannered and soft spoken, but strong where it mattered and protective to a fault. Were it not for the unmistakable scent that exuded from him, you wouldn’t guess he was an Alpha at all, or at least he certainly didn’t fit the description of most of the Alpha’s your father warned you about-all full of machismo and brutality, ready at a moment’s notice to tear you apart to satisfy their own base urges.
This man was the opposite of that, and when you fell for him, you fell hard.
Years past in a whirlwind, from the initial awkward first dates, to buying your own place together, to his heartfelt proposal to you. Through it all he always remained respectful, giving you all the space and time you needed to adjust to your life with him, never pushing his boundaries or showing any untoward aggression or advances.  Because of this, even after spending years together, you were able to remain pure, saving yourself for the day the two of you would join as one, marking each other to truly solidify your union.
And so time marched on, moving so fast that on more than one occasion you wished you could stop the clock altogether, just to steal a few more moments with him.
But now, you would never enjoy his company ever again.
His corpse had been tossed aside, discarded several feet from where you lay. It was so bloodied and broken you could barely recognize it as human, let alone as someone you once loved. Your chest rose and fell with erratic breaths punctuated by fear, the desire welling inside of you momentarily quelled by this sudden nightmare.
Minutes ago he was atop you, peeling the clothing from your aching, hot body. Moving painfully slow, he took his time enjoying your first heat with him, no longer constrained by the suppressors you had taken your whole life. You were scared of the process, worried about losing control of yourself and becoming mindless, driven by only your base needs. Not to mention the pain it would entail, the endless torture of emptiness, and the desperation you would experience relying solely on him for release from your torment.
But he had been patient and understanding through the whole process, explaining how it would all go down and how he would help you through it, alleviating any rogue fears that still remained. He even went so far as to help you prepare your nest, purchasing you any and everything you may need to make it comforting and inviting for when the time finally arrived. Meticulously helping you arrange everything while gushing about how excited he was, how lucky he felt having you as his mate, the one he would be eternally bonded too. He seemed more into the prep work than even you did.
Now, the nest that was to be used to consummate your love was stained in crimson, his blood splashing across it in vibrant streaks the moment he was knocked off you, flung across the room like a rag doll. No matter how badly you wanted to, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the lifeless body that used to be your beloved. Everything that had made him shine had been stolen in the blink of an eye, leaving only a husk remaining.
Above him stood his murderer, Yujiro Hanma, looming with a bestial sort of feral energy as he stared at the carcass by his feet.  Before this moment, you had never interacted with the man they called ‘The Ogre’, but that didn’t mean you didn’t know all about him. It was hard not to-the strongest man in the world was a celebrity in his own right, renowned the world over for his ferocity and ruthless nature. He had started and ended wars by simply existing, going wherever he pleased and doing whatever he wanted because there was no one who could stop him. He ruled countries from the shadows, amassed wealth and respect from the most influential men in the world. Truly, he was not a person to be reckoned with.
All that aside, you knew him best as the man your father despised the most. A once respected comrade from your father’s military days, you were aware that Yujiro had done something unspeakable to your father in the past, therefore disgracing him from your entire family. Your father had always been an amicable and fair man, someone that you couldn’t imagine having any enemies (even with his military background), let alone ones that used to be dear friends. And while the mystery of what Yujiro may have done to your father to receive this treatment gnawed incessantly at your brain, you kept your questions to yourself, not wanting to open any old wounds that may hurt him in the process.
Now you wished you had pressed the issue more, maybe then you would have a clue as to why this mythical family villain had abruptly entered the scene, irrevocably changing your life in the process.
The slaughter happened so quickly that Yujiro didn’t even break a sweat. Not that he would have anyway-the differences in ability were clear as day, you didn’t need any fighting prowess to realize that. Your mate never stood a chance.
The ogre’s fiery hair danced wildly around his head like a halo as he turned his attention your way, his figure both terrifying and awe inspiring as he took his time stalking towards your vulnerable form. There was no need for him to rush- the power of his presence alone was enough to root you in place.
Splayed out in your nest, you were completely exposed. Your nude chest heaving as a thin layer of sweat coated you, anxiety and confusion mingling with the raging heat your body was going through. Even after watching the execution of your mate before your very eyes, your body was still yearning, causing a horrible, all-encompassing burning that scalded you from the inside out. It made you desperate for release as your mate was in the process of marking you, taking his time exploring the body of the woman with whom he was destined to spend the rest of his life with before carrying out the duty.
And while his drawn out advance was driving you to the point of madness, amplifying the throbbing ache in your core with each teasing touch of his hands and sensual kiss of his lips, you knew the sluggish pace was for your benefit-to prepare you properly. It was your first time, the start of your forever with him. He wanted to make it special, for your pleasure to be immeasurable when he finally entered you, making you feel so good that when he bit down to mark you as his, the pain would be nothing in comparison, if felt at all. You had a life time of love ahead of you, but that was no excuse for him to give in to his desire and rush your first union.
But he was gone now, and his kindness had left you feverish and wanting-so desperately wanting- release. Craving your alpha, needing him so badly you could barely stand it, you writhed pathetically on the ground, whimpering in agony at the absence of fulfillment. Unable to control yourself, your hand traveled to your privates, tears flooding your eyes when stuffing your fingers deep inside of yourself only seemed to hurt you more. It was hollow and empty, not what you needed, not what you craved.
Were you in your normal mindset, revulsion would have washed over you at your actions-the love of your life had just been slain and here you were making a sorry attempt at masturbation while his body lay decomposing beside you. What kind of woman does that? How could you live with yourself after this? How could you tell yourself you truly love him, when now that he’s gone the only feeling your addled brain can conjure is disappointment over the fact that you won’t get the fucking you have become so desperate for?
How had you become so disgusting? You lightly shook your head, trying to dispel the thoughts of self-loathing. Perhaps the blame did not lie fully on your shoulders, but to another culprit, one who was stalking his way closer and closer to you with each passing moment, hunting you as a wolf does livestock.
In any other scenario, this heart-rending moment would have been enough to crack the shell of haze your heat had left you in, no matter how worked up you had become. But the man who was now standing above you, Yujiro Hanma, was dangerous in ways you hadn’t even begun to fathom. His smell of his musk was so overbearing you nearly choked on it, the lust it sent coursing through your body turning you into something unrecognizable. You honed in on Yujiros scent long before his arrival, at first mistaking it for your own mate’s scent that had been amplified by your combined heats. And while it disgusted you to admit it, this new, intoxicating scent excited you far more than your own lover’s ever had, turning your mind to mush the longer you inhaled its aroma.
Yujiro’s cruel eyes bore down upon you, a look of mild amusement displayed on his face as he took in your weakened state. The smirk he wore as he killed your lover began to grow, his lips spreading into a full on smile, baring his teeth in a look that could only be considered as malicious.
“Well what do we have here,” he leered, the mere sound of his husky voice enough to make you moan, “Feeling a bit neglected, are we?”
He bent down on his knee, kneeling beside you as his eyes flicked across your body. After a brief once over, his large hand reached out towards your head, thick fingers knotting themselves into a fist as they gripped your hair. Roughly he yanked you up, dangling you mere inches from his face as he continued to stare at you with his horrible, ravenous eyes.
You scrambled to get your bearings, perching yourself on your knees to help alleviate the pressure on your scalp. Positioned so closely to him, his pheromones became even more intense, slick starting to seep from inside you from the proximity alone. Bright red bloomed across your body, a mixture of extreme arousal and embarrassment, as you wriggled in his hold.
Yujiro scoffed, “Look at you, I haven’t even touched you and you’re already leaking,” He swiped his fingers briskly against your weeping pussy, making you cry out as he gathered the evidence of your intoxication on his hand. Holding the glistening fingers up to your face, his smile returned as he goaded you.  “Bet your little boyfriend lacked the power to make that happen, didn’t he?”
Any anger that may have welled inside you over the slight against your beloved was instantly quelled, eaten by the tumultuous feeling of frustration the situation ensnared you in. All you could do was stare at Yujiro with pleading eyes, any words you attempted to speak dying out the moment you tried to voice them, becoming little more than whiny, petulant mewlings. Rubbing your thighs together in an attempt to create friction, you prayed he would show an ounce of mercy and grant you release soon, fretting over how much longer your body could handle waiting.
Yujiro sighed, chuckling softly under his breath, “Your father is a damned fool, you know that? I told that stubborn bastard that his cute little Omega daughter was meant to be mine, knew it the moment I saw you. I warned him that he could try and pair you off with some other lesser Alpha, but it would be a waste of time. You were fated to be mine- made to take my cock. Trying to make you anything other than my bitch was both asinine and disgraceful.”
He shot you another wicked smile, “Idiots like him may not realize what a fucking honor it is to be my cumdump, but surely you do, right sweetheart?”
You squeaked as he tugged you closer, his breath fanning your face while he stared down his nose at you, “Or maybe you don’t, given the situation I found you in. Looks like my ravenous little whore just couldn’t contain herself, could she?”
His lips curled into a snarl, his booming voice reverberating through your bones as he continued to address your misdemeanor. “Nesting with some weak piece of shit like that, have you no pride in yourself? I’m embarrassed you even gave him the time of day, let alone bared yourself to him. Who do you think you are, trying to fuck basic trash when you belong to me?”
Without giving you a chance to respond, he released his grip on your hair, shoving you roughly to the ground in the process. Hearing him move behind you, you attempted to push your feeble body into a sitting position, trying to reacclimate yourself. However before you could achieve this simple goal, his hand latched to the back of your head, shoving it down until it was smothered in the soft blankets beneath you. His free hand yanked your legs out from under you, pulling your ass up in the process. Though you couldn’t see him, the power radiating from him was immense, his aura so domineering you felt as if it alone was steadily crushing you. Were you in any sane frame of mind you would fear for your life, struggle and fight against the oppressive hardness that slotted itself against your dripping entrance.
But the slave you had become welcomed the intrusion, and as he tightened his hold on you, growling in your ear like the wild animal he had proved himself to be, you couldn’t stop your body from shuddering in anticipation of what was to come.
“It’s time for some corrective action.”
He entered you violently, his thick cock impossibly hot as he sheathed himself inside of you. The initial pain tore a scream from your throat, your vision dotting as you felt blood trail steadily down your shaking legs. He gave you no time to adjust, continuing his brutal assault as he pounded into you, uncaring of the damage he was inflicting upon you. The smack of his skin against your was punctuated by your cries, at first full of pain, but slowly morphing into expulsions of pleasure.
When the abruptness of his entrance fully subsided, you began to focus on the feel of him inside of you. Each slam of his hips ignited you, creating a feverish frenzy within that blocked out all other sensations and judgment. He filled you so completely, easily reaching all the spots that your fingers tried so desperately to reach just moments ago, satisfying all the areas that had been so urgently in need of attention with each stroke of his cock. You wanted more, needed more, moving in time with him as you chased after your pleasure. Wanton moans spilled from your lips, muffled by the bedding that was being shoved into your mouth with each thrust.
Even in the uncomfortable position he had locked you in, unable to breathe properly or escape from his grasp, all you could find yourself caring about was the alpha behind you and how he was making you feel- a strange sense of pride bubbled inside you the longer he went at you. The most powerful man in the world was doing little more than using you, and yet it was the fact that he chose you to begin with that filled you with flattery. A nobody like you being sought out by an alpha like him... Isn’t that what all Omegas dreamed of? To be desired by a dominant Alpha, having the honor of bringing them pleasure and receiving pleasure in turn, wasn’t that your only purpose, your reason for being?
You never dreamed you would feel that way before, but now you were finally starting to understand. The delirium of your desire had launched you into a state of inescapable euphoria, rebirthing you as nothing more than a shell of a woman who had finally realized her purpose, completely giving herself over to her unquenchable cravings while her Alpha’s assault molded her destiny.
Yujiro was a monster. Any man who did what they had done to the love of your life, any man whom your father had hated to the point of excommunication, any man who would violate you in such a way without so much as batting an eye, was an abomination-the remaining rational part of your mind understood this.
Yet as this demon, deserving of nothing but your scorn and hatred, spilled himself inside of you all you could feel was thankful. Thankful that the ungodly heat was starting to subside, happy that the pain the experience had brought you was alleviated, and blissed out over the feel of him nestled deeply inside of you, convulsing as the twitch of his cumming cock rained pleasure down upon you.
Finally, you felt complete.
After pumping you full of his hefty load, he hoisted you up in his arms, repositioning you so that you were facing him, straddling his lap. Gasping the moment you gained access to fresh air, a distressed groan croaked from your throat as his incisors latched to your neck, sinking deep into your scent gland. Your body shuddered at the sensation, fresh waves of pain and rapture coursing through you as he marked you decisively as his.
The cock that was still stuffed inside of you remained rigid, showing no signs of softening as your walls fluttered around it, the next round of your heat coming far sooner than you had anticipated. His hand wrapped securely around your throat, replacing where his lips had just been. He clamped down hard, pain pulsating from the open wound your scent gland had become, struggling once more to breath. His other hand grasped your hip, both limbs working in unison to bounce you on his dick-using you as if you were a human fleshlight.
“Don’t forget your place again,” he grunted, pulling you down on his cock so harshly, you saw stars, “You’re mine now.”
46 notes · View notes
mcflymemes · 13 hours
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STAR WARS: EPISODE VI - RETURN OF THE JEDI PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the 1983 film, adjust as necessary
i'll not leave you here. i've got to save you.
what i told you was true... from a certain point of view.
you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view.
there is still good in him.
you may dispense with the pleasantries.
i'm here to put you back on schedule.
perhaps i can find new ways to motivate them.
we shall double our efforts.
don't talk that way.
you have a power i don't understand and could never have.
i know. somehow, i've always known.
he must be allowed to speak.
it's your choice, but i warn you not to underestimate my powers.
i shall enjoy watching you die.
good, i hate long waits.
doesn't sound so bad.
she was very beautiful. kind, but sad.
so you have accepted the truth?
that name no longer has any meaning for me.
you want this, don't you? the hate is swelling in you now.
it is unavoidable. it is your destiny.
how many languages do you speak?
you are unwise to lower your defenses.
all craft, prepare to retreat.
we've got to give him more time.
it's an older code, sir, but it checks out.
there may be more of them out there.
i have a really bad feeling about this.
it only takes one to sound the alarm.
you cannot escape your destiny.
i can't kill my own father.
why don't you use your divine influence and get us out of this?
i beg your pardon, but that just wouldn't be proper.
you were our only hope.
soon i'll be dead, and you with me.
your insight serves you well.
bury your feelings deep down, [name].
help me take this mask off.
i do believe they think i am some sort of god.
i can't see! what's going on?
i assure you, we are quite safe from your friends here.
i'm out of it for a little while, everyone gets delusions of grandeur.
if you will not fight, then you will meet your destiny.
just for once... let me look on you with my own eyes.
no, you're coming with me.
your overconfidence is your weakness.
you were right. you were right about me.
together again, huh?
i feel the good in you, the conflict.
there is no conflict.
you couldn't bring yourself to kill me before and i don't believe you'll destroy me now.
you've failed.
who are you?
you cannot hide forever.
i will not fight you.
it is the only way you can save your friends.
your thoughts betray you.
when he comes back, i won't get in the way.
it's not like that at all.
i can't do it. i can't go on alone.
i think my eyes are getting better.
there's nothing to see. i used to live here, you know.
how could they be jamming us if they don't know if we're coming.
break off the attack! the shield is still up!
take evasive action!
keep your distance, though, but don't look like you're trying to keep your distance.
i don't know. fly casual.
you can't do this. i feel the conflict within you. let go of your hate.
this is an unexpected pleasure.
you're going to die here, you know. convenient.
tell me. what's troubling you?
you're a jittery little thing, aren't you?
i just said you were a fair pilot!
i'm surprised they didn't ask you to do it.
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Yandere AM is cruel. But what kinds of yanderes would the main 5 be? Who would be safer to be with? (Plot twist it's neither of them/hj)
i love how since you don't know me well, you assume that the very mild version of yandere AM i showed so far is cruel to you.
The Five as yanderes
Ellen (book leaning)
The emotional type.
Ellen is the only one who kept some of her humanity. She still cares about the others. And she cares about you so, so much... All because you've shown her kindness the others don't show her anymore.
No, to the others, she's scum. She's aware of that. She knows they only really bother to take care of her because she let them all use her body. She's accepted that it was her only real value for the rest of the group. Well, maybe except for Benny, Benny was nice to her most of the time.
But you? You felt bad for how the others treated her. You offered her a shoulder to cry on. You offered to hold her, let everything out. And she missed being loved. She missed being cared for and held.
She becomes addicted to it. To you. She wants all of your attention, all of your affection, all of your love.
She'll scream. She'll cry. She'll beg.
She loves you. She needs you.
And she'll do anything in her power to make sure she gets you.
Gorrister (game and book mixed)
The wifebeater violent type.
There's very little left of what Gorrister used to be. A once passionate man who then lost himself, first to how his life turned out and then to that damn computer. He was now heartless, both literally and figuratively.
And yet, it would seem a certain kind of passion was... re-awakened in Gorrister. All because of your sweet self.
You tried so hard to reach inside him again. To try and find the man he once was. You could say you succeded, in a way. A very hurtful way, sadly.
Gorrister was now an angry man with an unhealthy attachment to you. He wanted you all to himself, no matter what he'd have to do to keep the small spark of light in his life.
And if beating you was the only way to get you to work with him? That's what he's gonna do, darling.
Ted (book and game mixed)
The manipulative type.
Ted is an expert at lying and manipulating people for his advantage. Especially now. He's a charmer, really! And you're just so easy for him, so nice, so sweet... He loves it.
He manages to wrap you around his little finger. He'll convince you that he's your knight in shining armor, that he's your only real friend, that you can depend on him, that he'll protect you...
He's your only friend around there, really! The only person you can really trust!
He's possessive and has a tendency to objectify his partners. Especially women. His mind was a truly dark place now, seeing as he barely respected anyone at this rate. You have to listen through his rants about how all the others are affected by AM and how he's the only sane one. He'll insult everyone, you included.
And then he'll gaslight you into thinking he's right and that you're slowly losing your mind because of AM. He's your only true beacon of hope, your only link to sanity.
And you'll do everything for him, won't you?
Benny
The worshiping type.
Poor Benny doesn't really understand love anymore, due to all the damage AM caused to his brain. But he understands all the kindness you've shown him. He knows you were the one who comforted him through all the pain caused by that damn machine.
Especially since you'd try to chase after him and help save him from more pain. You did your best for him, and he took your kindness when he could, his brain warping it into a worship-like obsession.
It starts off innocent. If he managed to find something "nice", he'd bring it to you. He would follow you, seek you out, do anything for your attention to be on him exclusively, even if he had to pull you away from the others and hold you down to cuddle him.
And he's very physically strong. He's not letting go, you're the most important person in his life, after all. The others need to learn that, too. Or he'll use those teeth AM gave him to rip their guts out.
But hey, their hearts would be a great offering for you.
To show just how great his love to you is.
Nimdok
The twó-faced type.
He's an old man who barely remembers anything about his past. You naturally want to help him, don't you? Of course you do, you're such a kind person...
But the truth is, even without his memory, you can never take the cruelty out of a monster. And he worked with doctor Mengele himself, he may not be as bad as the Angel of Death himself, but he's definitely no saint.
For you, though, he's just a poor old man that AM torments alongside the others. But the others...?
Well, he might not remember what he did, but he sure remembers how to be a scary motherfucker and how to form his incredibly detailed, whispered threats to make them all leave you alone. And of course, he will make those threats come true if needed.
You have no clue, of course. You think he's a sweet old man, the only one who's actually nice to you, unlike the others who push you away.
And the others... they get to see his true colors.
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konigsblog · 2 days
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do ppl not know how to interact with content they dont like? likw why dont they just block u and move on with their day? i love how u handle all the messages tho its very mature and u r very much being the bigger person :)
we've been graced with the block button and the ability to filter out certain words and content, and despite that, these people are desperate to shame others for their coping mechanisms, trauma responses, or fantasies. these people claim they care about victims and that's why they insult authors who write about rape fantasies, but those two things contradict each other. you can't care for rape victims and make no effort to understand rape fantasies, and you should acknowledge that even if someone isn't a victim of sa, there's nothing wrong, disgusting, or immoral with having a fantasy. the majority of the time it stems from power and control, and there's plenty of resources online to read.
it's repetitive, and a lot of the time it's the same bullshit insults that i've heard hundreds of times 😮‍💨 thank you for your kind words, my dove 🕊️🪽🫂
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reverend-meat · 2 days
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thinking about Seymour and how he’s a foil to not just Yuna but to Tidus as well. How he is the story showing us what could have happened to either of them had just a few factors been changed.
Seymour Guado, biracial just like Yuna but unable to hide what he is. Too Guado to be human and too human to be accepted by the Guado until he is of use.
A powerful father just like Yuna and Tidus, but what might have happened if Tidus’ mother disappeared instead? Left him with a father that saw him not as a boy but as an extension of himself? Some legacy he had to live up to? What would have happened if Braska weren't a kind man? If he hadn't made absolutely certain someone would take Yuna away from Bevelle so that the political machine couldn't use her status and Braskas legacy as a weapon? If Braska hadn’t made sure that no one and nothing could shape her future but her own free will?
what would have happened if either one of them had been faced with the choice at SEVEN to sacrifice the one person who loved them unconditionally? To sacrifice them for a useless cycle no one would even believe him about if he told them? Sacrificed their own mother for a religion that didn't care for them? To please a father who sent him off KNOWING he would die? Because the only thing that would make Jyscal Guado proud of his half breed son would be to inherit his legacy? To make him a statue, a portrait with no voice?
GOD, Imagine Yuna or Tidus finding out at seven that there is no God that loves you. There is NO ONE that loves you, there is only power and weakness. Then climbing back down Mt Gagazet, alone, afraid and small, knowing they’ll never see their mother again?
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deoidesign · 28 days
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drawing my favorite sculpture but it's my guy
(Barberini Faun)
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egophiliac · 9 months
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just thinking about hair and faces
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