#the uses of anger

[soracities]

Audre Lorde, from "The Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism" (1981)

#q #quotes #essays and articles #audre lorde #the uses of anger #id included #echoes of the other #on culture #typography #m #x

[the-final-sentence]

We welcome all women who can meet us, face to face, beyond objectification and beyond guilt.

Audre Lorde, from "The Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism"

#Audre Lorde #the uses of anger #The Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism

[autisticgod]

hey girls um did you know that...

everything can be used / except what is wasteful / (you will need / to remember this when you are accused of destruction)

#audre lorde #the uses of anger #for each of you

[dreamer434]

"Anger is not simply an emotion. It is a highly evolved biological process and a deeply personal experience. Rather than judging, stifling, or fearing our anger, we should turn toward it and listen carefully. We should notice what it does to our bodies. And, once we have taken the vital pause to allow those signals to ease, we can put our cerebral cortex in the driver’s seat and interrogate our anger, asking what is wrong and deciding what action is or is not called for in this socio-cultural context.

Amanda Smith Barusch from Aging angry : making peace with rage

#quotes #amanda smith barusch #aging angry : making peace with rage #shape shifters: a journey through the changing human body #nvc #nourishment #authentic #choose theory #emotional agility #seneca #king lear #disco elysium #the uses of anger #who we are a chronicle of racism in america #step by step #pandora's jar women in the Greek myths #reconcile fowl play #this video will make you angry #learning from others #spontaneity #second nature #careful side effects may vary #locus of control #love's knowledge

[muffinlance]

We've been working with toddler on using his words instead of screaming when something happens that he doesn't like

Which has lead to:

Toddler, upon accidentally dropping a toy: ANGER ANGER ANGER!

#you're doing it son you're using your words #new life strategy: stare the thing that upsets you dead in the eye #and chant #ANGER #if it's half as freeing as kiddo makes it look you'll soon feel amazing

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him. #bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?'' #'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''

[saltair-and-webweaves]

i get mean when i’m nervous like a bad dog

Unknown/@papayajuan2019/a hero of our time - mikhail lermontov/poor things (2023)/ @sarakleijn/venetta octavia/ @papayajuan2019/@ https.c0rps3 on instagram/cop car - mitski

#Lilly’s weaves #web weaving #web weave #parallels #poetry #poetry parallels #book quotes #quotes #poor things #Mitski #cop car #feminine rage #girlblogging #this is what makes us girls #anger issues #cruelty #bad dog aesthetic #that should be a thing tbh #i’m a bad person

[fellas-is-it]

got tired of all depressing and hating yourself for being aro vibes on legit any other platform besides tumblr (looking at you tictac app) so wanted to listen to positive aromantic playlists and legit could NOT FIND ANY??????

And the ones that were vaguely positive were made for aroace ppl. Which is great! But im not ace!!! So WHERE'S MY POSITIVE AROALLO REP?!?!?!

Anyways i solved this hyperspecific problem myself and made a POSITIVE AROALLO playlist:

Larger image of the playlist cover i made

#plz i am starved #if anyone has a positive aro playlist SHARE WITH THE CLASS #no hate towards us bonding over our share anger/grief at the world its important and we SHOULD talk about it #but not ALL THE TIME???? #it SHOULDNT be THIS HARD to find good vibe songs for us #ive BEEN thru the hating being aromatic stage I GET IT #but jesus christ we can LIGHTEN UP A LITTLE?? #aro #aromantic #aro problems #aro culture is #aroallo #aromantism #aromatic positivity #aro pride #aro posting #aroallo pride #lgbtq #arospec #aspec #aro discourse #pride #alloaro

[reasonsforhope]

You don't need to believe that people as a whole are good or well-intentioned to be an optimist about fixing climate change.

A lot of the time, it's enough to trust in this: people hate being screwed over. And even more than that, they hate feeling screwed over.

Climate change is actively screwing over almost every single person on this planet, whether they know it or not. We just need to keep making sure that people do know that they're getting screwed over, along with all their loved ones, and who's doing it.

Spite and righteous anger will honestly do a lot of the rest.

#hope #good news #hope posting #climate change #climate optimism #life #not news #advice #me #human nature #like. obviously this is imho. but also I'm genuinely convinced that I'm right #spite and anger are powerful motivators #there are scientists who argue that anger's whole evolutionary purpose #is to keep us from being screwed over #because that's so vital to our survival #and what's more vital to our survival than a liveable planet??? #channel your anger into action #do not let anyone tell you that optimism or being an activist or being part of a healthy community means never being angry #that is so so untrue #and if you find a way to channel your anger and pain and grief to do GOOD in the world #to help people #then that will also do a lot to stop your emotions from eating you up inside #hopepunk #anger #spite #optimism #hopeposting #humanity

[insignificantfailure]

Why the fuck am I the way I am

#i want to use all the insults i know on myself #im so tired #vent #venting #i'm sad #depressing shit #vent blog #mentally fucked #mentally tired #tw depressing thoughts #actually mentally ill #suixide #su!cidal #angry #self h@te #tw selfhate #i hate my self #anger issues #mentally drained #mental illness

[dead-girl-tells-stories]

Everyone from babies to young adults suddenly disappears from Amity Park, and the ghost portal self-destructs as well. The GIW and the Fentons obviously come to the conclusion that it’s ghosts but realize that this issue is way bigger than they can handle, so they call in the big guns, The Justice League.

Of course, they don’t tell the Justice League everything when they come. No matter how much they thought themselves to be heroes, they were simply glorified police in spandex. And with how they operate, they are all too small-minded and won’t be able to see the bigger picture. They also knew fully well that a lot of their methods weren’t even remotely close to being morally or ethically right, and if the JL found out, they would be screwed. So they simply told them enough to get them on their side. 

Besides, how could they not help with how many people were missing? This was going to be easy.

_______

The Justice League didn’t trust the GIW. Something about them was just off. But so many missing people were on the line, so many kids! 

Ghost?

Should they call in the JLD?

_______

Jason knew something was off with Crime Ally.

Nothing was wrong per se. In fact, everything was going great. Crime was at its lowest in like… forever. The general atmosphere was more calm, if not a bit chilly. He himself was calmer. And there were fewer kids on the streets. Which would have been a good thing if this wasn’t fuckin’ CRIME ALLY!

Jason’s been stressing himself out, trying to find out what was going on. He’s been searching up and down, talking to people left and right. No one was reporting anything amiss. Some even told him that they still saw the kids walking around, though not as often as before. And they also looked like they were being well taken care of.

He even saw and talked to some of the kids himself and it was the truth. 

But when he asked where they went, they only laughed and ran away from him. Shouting that he would know soon before they disappeared around the corner. At this point, he was sufficiently freaked out and was so close to getting Batman to contact the JLD, but something told him otherwise.

A few days later Jason was in bed. He had ended patrol early that night and intended to get a full eight hours if he could.

But as fate would have it, he would not. Because just before he could hit the hay he heard it. Well, felt it would be more accurate but how could you feel a siren’s song? Pulling you? Drawing you in. Telling you that it would give you your deepest desire.

He didn’t even bother to suit back up into Red Hood. He just followed it. Followed and followed, Until he got to a dead-end alleyway. But there was no ‘end’. All there was, was darkness. 

He began to get skeptical and took a few steps back. But the feeling was still there. Pulling, telling that all of his answers were in that darkness. Everything he wanted, needed, awaited beyond it. 

He did the stupid thing and went into the darkness.

He didn’t know what he was expecting, but it wasn’t the feeling of walking through thick goop. But the feeling didn’t last long, and he eventually stepped out.

Again, he didn’t know what he was expecting, but it wasn’t this. 

Kids running around without a care in the world, unrestricted. Teenagers just hanging out and being kids too. Whatever adults he saw all looked pretty young, but they were all happy. 

He looked around and noticed that it looked like a weird mix between a suburb and a night market, but it worked quite well. The stalls were all unmanned, and it seemed whoever could just take whatever they wanted. Dim but pretty lights connected all the stalls to as far as his eyes could see. And the sky.

In Gotham, there’s so much smog and bad weather you’d be lucky to even see a piece of blue during the day so no wonder people often forget about the night. But this, the night sky wherever he was, was beautiful, beyond what words and even thoughts could convey.

“Hello, Mr. Red Hood.”

Jason jumped. Was he so out of it that he didn’t even notice someone coming up behind-

Forget what he just said about the sky. The woman right here that was now standing before him? She- She-

“Are you single?”

There was silence. Then she giggled. Guess Jason didn’t need his helmet huh? His face was enough.

He also wanted to die again but hey, at least she laughed!

#dp x dc #dc x dp #dcxdp #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc prompt #dp dc crossover #dpxdc #another one? #wow im on a roll #the GIW were starting to kidnap and experiment on ghost and liminals as well #mostly kids #danny and the gang wasn't having it #so after talking with CW he found out he could use his newfound Ghost King authority and transport everyone to a safe place! #He did ask everyone's permission first tho #after negotiating with Lady Gotham he was allowed to have a subspace between normal Gotham and ghost Gotham #as long as he helped maintain the balance on both sides #this is a ploy between LG and CW to start teaching their King how to care for his people #both living and non living #did I mention #anger management

[soracities]

Audre Lorde, from "The Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism" (1981) [ID'd]

#q #quotes #audre lorde #the uses of anger #typography #essays and articles #id included #notes on culture #favourite #m #x #*

[egophiliac]

his magic is so PINK and FLUFFY and PRETTY! I love it!

I'm ready to process the Diasomnias now, buckle up

#art #unique magic posters #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #meanwhile at the super awesome kalim dream base #anyway I KNEW IT! I KNEW HE WAS A DREAMWALKER! #VALIDATION #love me a unique magic that is only really useful in one extremely specific and exceedingly unlikely situation #sure was lucky that silver was on the island huh! #okay everybody i am about to be even more embarrassing than usual over anime characters. hold on. #but i am ALL OVER silver right now. just really really enjoying him! #i love that his reaction to all of this is anger. i love that his reaction to malleus is basically 'how DARE you' #my boy is full of righteous fury and he is going to make it everyone else's problem #his deeply-ingrained respect for mal and lilia is such a big part of his character that it's just. #always such a nice character moment when that breaks! #like when he yelled at lilia during endless halloween night! granted it was lower stakes then but. still. #it'sgoodstorytelling.jpg #meanwhile sebek is over in a corner sobbing and going 'what is HAPPENING' which is its own brand of deliciousness #god. this game really does just slam its fists down onto all of my personal 'I LIKE THIS' buttons. #and now they give me silver's beautiful pink fluffy cloud dream palace. find me a chef to kiss because MWAH #i can't believe they cut it off RIGHT before we were about to learn his backstory. i mean i absolutely can. but you know what i mean. #i have to know the meaning of the shitty acorn bracelet. twst. twst please.

[juniper-divination-and-witchery]

Audre Lorde

#audre lorde #the uses of anger #quotes

[beldaroot]

i love a hypocrite :)

#witch hat atelier #wha #wha spoilers #qifrey #actually kinda funny that i could've added a bunch of panels of him using magic when he's mad as hell lol #he's not very professor-like at times but he's about to show the true meaning of anger and danger now and i for one am ready to see it hehe

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag #writeblr #it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal #fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho) #healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy #im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage.... #1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind #and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes #2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception'' #3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.'' #idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh #im sure there are people who have this experience normally #but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists #when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band'' #edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful #once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large #but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry. #but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes #but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally. #i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes #people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism #but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet . #i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY #and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound. #but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in #i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too. #here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change #was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort) #choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL