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introspectivememories · 3 months

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obsessed with the idea of timbern baby. like it starts in the cult and bear finds this kid, literal child, in the cult and y'know he may be a depressed and suicidal bastard but he's not so far gone that he's just gonna ignore a literal child (let's call him luka) in the pain cult. and bear's been rising through the ranks, so he smuggles luka out and tells (read: lectures) him to stay out. except this is the first time anyone's ever really cared about luka, so luka just latches onto bear.

eventually bear starts letting luka stay over at his apartment bc whoever was taking care of the luka before clearly doesn't care if he was left unsupervised enough to join a pain cult. so it becomes this kind of family unit. bear wakes up, wakes luka up, drops luka off at school, then goes to class, comes home and makes some food so luka has smth to eat after school, fucks around with the cult for a few hours, and then goes home and tries to avoid luka's concerned glances. wash, rinse, repeat.

and this is going well for a good few years and then senior year of college, everything goes into overdrive. bear who has risen through the ranks of the cult has been chosen for the sacrifice and yeah, luka will be sad when he dies or whatever but he's got money set aside for luka. luka can live on without him.

and then tim comes back into his life. tim drake from high school. his tim drake. darla's tim drake. their tim drake. who likes skateboarding and photography and is maybe a little too serious about mario kart. tim drake comes back and for a brief, weightless, moment, bear thinks he can do this. he can do this life thing and want to live. he can take care of luka and watch him graduate and be friends with tim again. he can stop blowing off the people at school who want to be friends with him. he can live again.

and then, like he does with everything, he ruins it. luka sees him off on the night of his "not-date" with tim drake with a teasing shout of "don't put out on the first date dad!" bear whacks him upside the head. the not-date goes really well right up until the fucking cult kidnaps him and preps him over the course of the next few days for the sacrifice. as he greets the pain like an old friend, all he thinks in between the haze of getting whipped is that luka must be going out of his mind with worry. and then they have him strapped to the altar and he lets the wine they're practically waterboarding him with take him away. his leader raises the knife and bear relaxes. this is where he was always meant to be. he has no other purpose than to be the vessel. it's not like he meant much anyway.

and then, robin is bursting onto the scene and punching the leaders in the face and somewhere in between kicking ass and taking names, bear realizes he wants to live. like for real, for real. he wants to wake up tomorrow. he doesn't actively want to die. he wants to see luka walk the stage at his high school graduation. he wants to hear tim drake laugh one more time. so he lets robin save him and then goes home and lets luka sob and fuss over him as bear promises to be a better parent.

and that's it he thinks. he definitely scared tim off with the whole getting kidnapped and being part of a cult thing. it's okay, he tells himself, at least you got tim back for a little while. but then tim is showing up at his door like a week later and he wants to go on a proper date?? like an actual date. bear is overjoyed but wary. tim drake is tim drake-wayne and bear is bernard dowd who has been consistently fucking up his life since his best friend got shot and died in high school. he figures that this thing between them will last maybe what, 4 months, before tim realizes he can do better.

except it lasts long than 4 months. it goes on for almost a year before bear realizes that tim is here to stay. well, fuck, now he has to tell his boyfriend that he has a kid. lord knows, luka wants to meet him too. so he texts tim one day, can we talk? and tim shows up at the cafe nervous and panicky. and bear just fucking blurts it out. i've got a kid. he says.

what? tim replies. i've got a kid. like a kid i'm raising. like a son. he says. so you're not breaking up with me? tim asks slowly. what? no! and so he explains the whole situation and tim just laughs a little hysterically and goes how does this happen twice? except now tim wants to meet his kid. so bear brings him over and to put it gently, it's a fuckin disaster. luka hates tim. tim spends the next year trying to get into luka's good graces. it only works when bear gets kidnappped for umpteenth time and tim spends the two weeks bear is missing for, taking care of luka and spending lots of his considerable fortune getting bear back.

#what even is this #im going crazy #save me timbern baby save me #for a second i was like mpreg? and then god came to me in a vision put his hand gently on my shoulder and said '...nah dont do that'#so i didn't #they are the family of all time to me #tim immediately becomes bruce and alfred's favorite cause tim is the first to give them a grandchild #dick: hey yknow me and kori have been together a long time! i should be the favorite #dami: yeah and how many proposals have you fumbled richard?#dami: marry the tamaranean and then start talking #dc #bernard dowd #tim drake #timber #timbern

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melestasflight · 9 months

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In the Silmarillion fandom, we enjoy grabbing the trope of “Nolofinwëan recklessness” and running wild with it.

The most common victims of this are Fingon the Rash Prince and Fingolfin the Impulsive King, who rushes into suicidal combat. Both father and son daring death within Morgoth’s domain.

It’s fun to write and exciting to imagine, no doubt, but I’d like to offer a different take. In fact, what makes Fingon and Fingolfin (and the rest of that family) compelling to me is their patience and endurance.

Yes, I’m aware Fingon rushes to battle at Alqualondë, but that’s a world-altering event. The light of the world has literally gone out, murder has happened in Valinor, Finwë is dead. Most of the Noldor are up on their feet and ready to depart. Everyone is rushing.

But this is not always the case with Fingon. Most significantly, the rescue of Maedhros is NOT an impulsive decision. The published Silmarillion offers no timeline on this, but in The Grey Annals, five entire years pass between the arrival of Fingolfin’s host to Beleriand and Fingon’s decision to look for Maedhros.

Five years in which the two hosts are quite literally on the verge of civil war because, let’s not forget:

No love was there in the hearts of those that followed Fingolfin for the House of Fëanor, for the agony of those that endured the crossing of the Ice had been great, and Fingolfin held the sons the accomplices of their father.

Diplomacy is a painfully slow (and absolutely frustrating!) ordeal. Fingon’s decision is born from this strife, from thirty years on the Helcaraxë, and five years of civil restlessness, not to mention the clear signs that Morgoth is ready to attack them at any moment:

Then Fingon the valiant, son of Fingolfin, resolved to heal the feud that divided the Noldor, before their Enemy should be ready for war; for the earth trembled in the Northlands with the thunder of the forges of Morgoth underground.

This is not rashness. This is the sacrifice of a captain who is willing to make the best of what time is left before full-out destruction begins. It would be rashness if Fingon got his company and crossed Mithrim to wage battle on the Fëanorians. Instead, he chooses differently for the sake of peace, stability, and renewed friendship.

The trek from Lake Mithrim to Thangorodrim could be estimated at around 150 miles, depending on the map we follow, and there are grasslands and two sets of mountains to cross, not to mention the horror of Thangorodrim. Fingon travels on foot. It would take him weeks, maybe even months, to find Maedhros. Plenty of time for the fire of rashness to cool down if that was the case. But he persists because he has no other choice.

Similarly, I often see takes on Fingolfin that he rushes to pointless combat with Morgoth in the same manner as Fëanor had done. Yet again, the timeline is crucial here. The published Silmarillion has the battle lasting at least several months. Bragollach starts in F.A. 455 during winter time:

There came a time of winter, when night was dark and without moon

The battle slows down presumably a few months later:

but the Battle of Sudden Flame is held to have ended with the coming of spring, when the onslaught of Morgoth grew less.

The onslaught grows less, but it doesn’t fully cease. Morgoth and Sauron reissue their attacks early into Fingon’s kingship.

In the Grey Annals, the timeline is stretched further out:

Year 455:

The Fell Year. Here came an end of peace and mirth. In the winter, at the year's beginning, Morgoth unloosed at last his long-gathered strength

Year 456:

Now Fingolfin, King of the Noldor, beheld (as it seemed to him) the utter ruin of his people, and the defeat beyond redress of all their houses, and he was filled with wrath and despair.

The fighting goes on actively anywhere from a season to a full year! Fingolfin tries to hold his kingdom together for a full year despite an absolute, unquestionable disaster. I mean, look at this description of the battle:

In the front of that fire came Glaurung the golden, father of dragons, in his full might; and in his train were Balrogs, and behind them came the black armies of the Orcs in multitudes such as the Noldor had never before seen or imagined. And they assaulted the fortresses of the Noldor, and broke the leaguer about Angband, and slew wherever they found them the Noldor and their allies, Grey elves and Men. Many of the stoutest of the foes of Morgoth were destroyed in the first days of that war, bewildered and dispersed and unable to muster their strength. War ceased not wholly ever again in Beleriand

Fingolfin’s decision to ride out, again, is not out of recklessness or a spur-of-the-moment decision. It’s everything but that. He has given everything and truly believes it’s all lost: “the utter ruin of his people, and the defeat beyond redress of all their houses.” (!!!)

This is a final stand, the King’s duty to stand by his people, even in death.

#fingon #fingolfin #maedhros #rescue of maedhros #dagor bragollach #close reading #silm #silmarillion #tolkien #long post #cw: war #cw: death

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sungbeam · 2 months

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BIRD HUNT — two

nonidol!choi line x f!reader

gotham city is a gutter running rampant with the ill, corrupt, and the insane. at times, justice and vengeance must be served by one's own hand... no matter the lengths one must go to do so.

▷ genre, au, etc. bat family au, dc comics inspired, dark, vigilantes au, slow burn, ceo/billionaire au, cat woman!reader, murder mystery au, action, suspense, angst, slow burn-ish?, love square??; choi line inspired by dick grayson (csb), jason todd (cyj), and tim drake (cbg), including bruce wayne for choi minho and damian wayne for nishimura riki, inspired by 2022's The Batman

▷ chapter warnings. swearing, mentions of death and murder, mentions of weaponry, blood, mentions of suicide but no actual act thereof, one suggestive comment

▷ word count. 4.3k // taglist. open

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FILE_02 : behind every man

gotham city.

[three days since your mother was murdered.]

You had no real friends or allies in Gotham City besides your mother and your extended family of stray cats. The metallic smell of blood had begun to cling to the walls after an hour of holding your mother's body close to you.

The police had come when you called.

They deemed it a suicide for simplicity's sake.

When you pointed out the note in a rage, they left it embedded in the wall as it laughed at you. Your hands were covered in your mother's blood like a morbidly crimson finger paint, and the damn cops weren't going to do anything about this. Not for someone like you. Not unless…

Not unless you used what you had in your arsenal.

It was stupid, you had thought at the time. It was an open invitation to get yourself thrown in the ringer by… oh Hell, you shivered so violently, it could be compared to a Magnitude 7 earthquake. No, you could never forgive yourself if you did that—the stupid idea popping into your head. And yet…

You knew that your mother would have never allowed you to sacrifice yourself so vulnerably. (The irony of the matter was that your mother would probably do the exact thing you were considering, had she been in your position.)

But by the third day of not leaving the apartment at all, you had made up your mind.

It was time to go see your father.

"We're investigating the murder of a mayoral candidate, Yeonjun, not a stripper."

Yeonjun rolled his eyes from where he sat in his armchair, legs crossed neatly over one another and his elbow perched on the armrest. There was a distinct look of boredom on his face as the flames of the fire in the hearth flickered across the sculpted grooves of his features. "Well, I know that. Strippers are more fun."

Soobin pretended he hadn't heard that. He pressed his index finger and thumb to his eyelids with a deep sigh. "So at least one of us has to be present at the company for the Choi-Palmer Merger. And at least one of us has to be present at the meeting with Commissioner Kim about the investigation."

"In unif—"

"In uniform," Soobin confirmed.

Beomgyu sipped his third cup of coffee this morning (it was approximately seven in the morning and he had a brief nap from one to two). There was something so addicting about the bitter taste and the buzz at the back of his head. He didn't feel like himself without it. Definitely not healthy, but he hadn't been healthy for a while. "You say at least one of us for both. So which one needs two of us?"

Yeonjun closed his eyes. "Why can't dad and Riki go?"

Soobin sent him a glare that Yeonjun pointedly ignored. "Because they're out of town? They've been out of town for a week, dude. Where have you been?"

"Serving justice," Yeonjun droned.

It wasn't difficult to sense the tension in the front parlor of the Choi Manor. There was always some sort of tension present, especially between the brothers. Riki never really dealt with it because they all had a soft spot for their half brother, and because Riki was too much like their father, Choi Minho, to care about what other people thought. It was no surprise as to why Riki was the favorite child. Soobin, Yeonjun, and Beomgyu had long since accepted it and wholeheartedly agreed. It was one of the rare few things the Chois could all agree on, actually.

Soobin strived to hold in another sigh. "Okay, fine. Whatever. I'll go meet with Kim to talk about what the Hell's going on this time." He slipped his phone out of his pocket to double check the details of the meeting and where it would take place. Usually, they would be in uniform under the cover of night, but there were exceptions. Plus, corruption nor crime waited for nightfall, so why should they?

Yeonjun nodded as he pushed up from his seat. He stretched his arms over his head, the popping of joints dull yet satisfying. "Cool."

As the two older brothers began to make their way out of the room, Beomgyu bolted upright. "Hey, wait! Who's doing the Palmer Merger?"

"You," Soobin and Yeonjun answered in sync—then promptly gagged to themselves. That was the cringiest thing they could've ever—

"Where the Hell are you going then, Yeonjun? There's no way you would entertain politicians," Beomgyu complained with his arms crossed firmly over his chest. "Even the dead ones."

Soobin's eyes narrowed at the slight dig at himself, but Yeonjun simply waved a flippant, uncaring hand. "I have a hot date."

Soobin scoffed. "With who? Your hand?"

Beomgyu didn't even bother suppressing his giggles of utter delight, especially when Yeonjun sent a look at his younger brothers. "You're both so rude—"

"Whatever you say, old man," Beomgyu jested. He picked his coffee cup up from the table and made his way past his brothers. "Have fun or whatever." As he walked away, his footsteps were so light that even in the hollow hallway, not even the dust stirred. His voice was distant and muffled as he called out for the family's butler and right-hand, Alfred Pennyworth, about what tie might go well with today's soon-to-be successful merger.

While he was away, Soobin clapped a hand on his older brother's shoulder as they too went down the hallway, but traveled further past the grand staircase in the foyer and into the chamber of a small elevator. "You know, Lee would murder you if you called your meeting with his girlfriend a 'hot date.'"

Yeonjun folded his arms over his chest. The elevator carriage began descending deeper into the manor's land to its subterranean levels. He scoffed. "Who said the hot date I was referring to was his girlfriend and not him?"

"Just marry him already," Soobin rolled his eyes, his head shaking.

The elevator came to a smooth stop, the door sliding open to reveal the massive, yawning cavern below the grounds of the Choi Manor. The squeal of bats echoed against the cool, stone walls and the LEDs installed into the ground and in select areas of the cavern roof blinked to life as the two brothers walked past them. It was a generous basement space that acted as headquarters for the family's alter egos as well as housed their vehicles. Beomgyu had called it the "Bat Cave" at one point, to which everyone in the family pointedly disagreed to. Their father was not pleased with it at all, but it had unfortunately yet gradually begun to stick.

Soobin stopped at a doorway that came up just before they would have reached the massive set of computer monitors and controls. He glanced over his shoulder to watch Yeonjun don a pair of matching brown leather gloves as he headed for the garage levels. "Hey."

His brother's split eyebrow quirked upward.

"Stay outta trouble, will ya?"

Yeonjun smirked. "I thought you knew me better than that, Bin."

Soobin huffed a sigh. He really couldn't control his older brother, nor his younger brothers, but he could definitely hope and dream. "At least wear a helmet, dickhead," he shouted after him.

The lights built into the perimeter of the runway shuttered to life as Yeonjun skipped up the steps to his beloved motorcycle. He cooed at his vehicle, hands gently caressing the handlebars and polished metal that he lovingly maintained. "Hi, baby. How we doin'? Can you hear that? He wants me to wear a helmet like you won't protect me."

"Oh my god, he's talking to it again." Soobin turned away from his strange, strange brother. He had much bigger fish to fry than worrying about Yeonjun. Contrary to popular opinion, Yeonjun could unfortunately take care of himself (most of the time).

Soobin pushed into the doorway and into the arsenal chambers. These were lit in dim, blue-white lighting—colors that Yeonjun and Beomgyu detested because of the clear "bias" toward Soobin and their father's uniforms, but Minho had simply rolled his eyes and approved the order for blue and white LEDs. There were separate rooms for uniforms, weaponry, and other gadgets that might be needed while out on patrol, but since this was simply a… conference of sorts, Soobin donned his black and blue uniform, along with the black domino mask fitted over the upper half of his face.

While Yeonjun was partial to his beloved pearl-handled pistols (and things that went BANG BANG, in general), Soobin preferred his escrima sticks—twin batons that were wired with tasers. Hand-to-hand combat and close combat was his specialty, and it was how his father had first taught him to fight. Everyone in the family could fist fight, but some preferred it and some didn't.

Once everything was in place, Soobin headed out to meet with Commissioner Kim about a man's murder. He hoped this wouldn't be a massive waste of his time.

You had never liked the look of the Iceberg Lounge. Its front door was like a rusted garage, and it was fixed below an active metro line. The train rattled on by every ten minutes or so and blew your hair behind and to the side of you as you monitored the exclusive club across the street from you. You had only ever been to the Iceberg Lounge a couple times, and that had been years and years ago when you had been pint-sized and your mother still acknowledged your father's presence. You wished you could carry on her routine of no longer acknowledging him, but desperate times called for incredibly desperate measures.

There weren't many ways you supposed you could break into the lounge without having to go through the front security. You could probably try to scale the wall to reach that one window way up there…

Or save yourself the trouble by simply going through the front. You sighed, clambering out of your car and making your way over to the front door, where a pair of big bouncers stood stationed outside. There wasn't a line, not when it was still day and there was too much risk of people recognizing other people.

The two men eyed you, and you them. You bet they could manhandle you if they wanted, but you flashed them your ID, and the one on the right lowered his mouth to his communicator. "Capo's daughter is here."

Ah, so he had been keeping an eye on you.

You were granted entry.

The smell of sweat and booze hit you like a massive gust of wind. The men behind you chuckled at the way you gagged, the doors slamming shut behind you. Your eyes shuttered like a camera lens in an attempt to quickly accustom them to the dimmed, blue-white lighting.

There weren't many people around at this time of day. You came upon a balcony railing that looked down to what you assumed to be a dance floor below. Above, you caught the gleam of the upper offices that overlooked the rest of the club with walls made of thick panes of glass. But your destination was further up, and so you made your way to a set of elevators to the left.

If you ventured down to the floors beneath the dance floor, you would find the VIP lounge—the real Iceberg Lounge. You remembered recognizing famous people you'd seen on TV down there before with scantily dressed women hanging off their arms like jewelry.

The elevator carriage brought you up to the top floor that opened up into a penthouse suite. Washed out white light poured through the window at the far wall and shelves of books and manuals and ledgers lined the walkway into the living space. There was a muted jazz tune playing from the record player in the far corner; you never thought your father would listen to jazz, really. He had always been a classical guy when you were young.

"It's been quite a long time—" You whirled around to find a tall, lanky man stepping out from one of the doors on the right side of the room. He wore crisp, black silk clothing, his face sculpted and well-kept. The hair on the back of your neck stood. "—but I suppose the phrase is 'better late than never.'"

You swallowed and steeled yourself. You didn't cry, you really didn't. "Mom—" your voice broke, "—mom's gone. I don't… I didn't know what to do or where to go…"

Your father hushed you as he enveloped you in his hold. You wondered in the back of your mind why he was so cold.

"It's okay, Yn. It's going to be okay."

You didn't cry. You really, really didn't.

But this was your mom. You loved your mom. "She's gone," you croaked into the expensive material of his shirt. "Someone killed her." There was a sort of grit in your voice from the congestion, but you liked to think it was passion.

His hand came up to smooth the hair at the back of your head in a sort of comforting gesture. You would take what you could get at this point. "Then they will pay, Yn. I will find them—you know I can."

You felt as cold as your father's body heat. "Do you know who could have done this?"

"I have ideas," he said quietly.

How was he so calm? You were close to shaking the information from him and going to deal with them yourself. Your father pulled away from you to take a look at your blank face. He placed a hand on your shoulder, guiding you to the sectional and offering you to sit with him.

"You know I have my enemies," he murmured. He leaned against the back cushion, eyes glazing over. "I'm just sorry you and your mother had to suffer because of them."

"Who?"

He glanced at you. "I don't know who exactly—"

"Then give me options." Your voice had steeled again, like your resolve. You swallowed—but you were still just a scared, little girl. You knew your father had enemies, but he had double the amount of connections and triple the power. You would exploit it if it meant bringing your mother the justice she deserved.

"Would you like to help?" That piqued your interest. Your father lifted a hand. "I understand that this is dangerous… this is a dangerous world, but you can be even more dangerous, if only you were given the proper guidance."

Those words… you didn't realize how much they could send a jolt through your veins. You weren't sure if it was good or bad though. But at this moment, it seemed to be what you wanted to hear.

"Could we… could we have a funeral for her?" Perhaps that was one of the only things you wanted. That, and justice. And maybe for your mother to come back.

Your father's eyes shone—with what, you couldn't tell just yet. "Of course, Yn. We can have a funeral. That is a small thing." You wished you had known just how small it was compared to all of the things he would ask of you.

There was a vintage diner located far from the Choi Enterprise building and far from anyplace anyone would think to find a member of the prestigious family. That was why Yeonjun loved it so much. Plus, the waffles weren't half bad.

A plate of said freshly made waffles had just been placed before him when the bell above the diner door jingled its merry, little tone. He hummed in delight, dancing in his chair a little bit, as he fed himself a chunk of the waffle smothered in melted butter and sweet maple syrup.

"Ooh, that looks so good, Jun."

Yeonjun grinned as another chunk of waffle went into his mouth. He glanced up from his plate only for a second in greeting to his so-called hot dates. "Mhm, she's a beauty."

He dug his fork and knife into the waffle piece, moaning softly with his eyes closed. "Mm-mm! Hear that crunch? Music to my goddamn ears."

Felix Lee rolled his eyes, tongue poking his cheek through an ill-concealed smile. There was a young woman next to him, who was already sliding into the squeaky, red vinyl booth across from Yeonjun. She was pretty—that much Yeonjun knew. After all, he was the one to have introduced his best friend, Felix, to her. It took a lot of courage to give him away like that.

Felix himself was a blond—well, not fully blond, but—wait a second.

Yeonjun shoved his bite into his cheek. His eyebrows furrowed, and he gestured to the tips of Felix's hair. Said tips that were now burned a scarlet red. "It's red."

Felix slid into the booth beside his girlfriend, who most everyone referred to as Nana, and braced his arm over the booth behind her. "Good to know your eyes still work, Choi."

It was always so strange, the contrast between the little nose and freckles to the deep, ass voice. Even after years of knowing him, Yeonjun still did a double take sometimes. He supposed it was good for scaring the shit out of the baddies when they couldn't see his face, and they only heard his voice and felt the sting of his arrowheads.

"Don't give me that, Arrow Boy—"

"Just saying, Red Hoodlum—"

Nana hit the table with her palm. "Hey! Can you bozos wait until I've had coffee before you start your lover's quarrel?"

Yeonjun averted his eyes to his waffle plate, and Felix winced. "Ah, sorry babe." Felix flicked his wrist to signal a waiter. The kid who arrived was the same bored, overworked and underpaid one who had delivered this golden plate of Heaven to Yeonjun. "Can I get a plate of that—" he gestured to the Heaven, "—and two cups of coffee? But both with a bit of milk as well."

"Thank you!" Nana called after the boy after he gave a dull bob of his head in acknowledgement. She then settled her elbows on the shiny, white table and braced her chin on her hands. "How're you, Jun?"

"Great," he replied between bites. "Managed to dip out on company duties and 'good guy' shit—"

"A normal day," Felix added.

Yeonjun lifted a shoulder like a half-hearted shrug. He wasn't about to disagree. "So everything's comin' up—"

"Order up!"

Nana perked up as the waiter kid set down twin mugs of steaming hot coffee. The woman delicately blew over the scalding hot surface while her boyfriend scarfed the shit down like it was water. It was funny, Yeonjun thought as he watched the two of them. So different, yet so similar. Felix was usually quite sunny and polite, like his girlfriend, but sometimes Yeonjun brought out the worst (he liked to think it was their true best) in people. Felix was actually a neighboring city's own watchdog and resident bow and arrow enthusiast, Speedy.

Yeah, Yeonjun loved that name when Felix told him what his vigilante name was. Tch. Speedy. He bet that was exactly how one could describe their experience with him in—

"That's good coffee," Felix said as he set the cup down. Empty. He glanced over at Nana who had just finished stirring in a packet of sugar and took a generous gulp of her drink. "Cheap but good, hm babe?"

"Mm," she hummed in affirmation. She set the mug down. "Okay, okay. Shall we—"

"Here's those waffles." Another plate of Heaven touched down onto the table, was slid over to Nana, and suddenly the words disappeared from her tongue as she indulged in pure goodness.

Yeonjun finished off his first waffle and vaguely gestured in the air with his fork. "I'm starting to think the universe just doesn't want me to find my mom."

Felix shrugged. He turned his head, eyes still looking at Yeonjun, as Nana fed him a fork of waffle. He swallowed, then replied, "Maybe. But it's not like the universe has done you any favors."

"That is so true, my friend."

"Why do you say the universe doesn't want you to find her?" Nana queried between bites.

Yeonjun set his utensils down then drummed his fingers against his chin where he had braced against his palm. "Well, for starters, it keeps interrupting you."

"Well," she emphasized, "you can stop thinking that, because I found a trail."

His breath hitched.

Felix grinned at his friend's reaction, arms holding his girlfriend by her shoulders. "See? Isn't she so good? She's so talented, such a genius."

"Nana Lee—" Yeonjun began.

"Yeonjun, that is not my name."

"Hey, let the man speak! And what do you mean that's not your name?"

"—I love you so much," Yeonjun finished, hands clasped together in prayer. As for whom he was praying to… well, he believed in no god, only himself. And perhaps the woman seated across from him.

Felix narrowed his eyes. "Okay, bro."

"Chill," Yeonjun said with a pointed look. "Nana, please do tell me what lead you have caught and how I may repay you."

Nana shook her head at this. "Oh no, you're not repaying me, Jun. Not for this."

"Oh, come on," he protested. He nodded to his best friend. "Back me up."

Nana sent Felix a sharp look, to which he could only raise his hands in surrender. "Baby says no, I say no."

Yeonjun narrowed his eyes at Felix this time, face twisted into an expression of pure disbelief. "Oh my god, you simp. Every other moment I give you a chance, you're begging me for money."

Felix coughed as Nana's eyebrow flew upward. "I've changed my ways, babe."

"Mhm," she hummed in disbelief, then returned to her waffles. Sometimes Yeonjun wondered how this pairing even worked, and then he realized that he needed to give himself more credit. Because this pairing definitely worked. He suppressed a chuckle to himself, but he knew Felix saw the way his eyes were alight in silent laughter.

Shut up, the blond seemed to say.

And in proper Yeonjun fashion, he smirked. Make me. "So, the lead?"

"Oh, yes. Right." Nana swiped a napkin over her lips. "She was put in witness protection quite a while ago." Yeonjun and Felix paused their squabbles, both of them fully tuning into Nana's findings. "Usually, they don't release such records to the public for obvious reasons, so I don't know much about her new identity."

Yeonjun cocked his head to the side. "Much? So you know something."

"She doesn't live in Gotham," she said. She paused, considering something. "But again, I found a trail. It's faint, but a trail is a trail."

He couldn't agree more. "Send me it when you can."

Soobin found that domino masks were relatively comfortable. They were definitely more comfortable than the entire cowl thing that his father wore as the Batman, and they didn't make him feel like he was suffocating. The rooftop of the police headquarters allowed for lots of breathing room, so as he inspected the photos of the scene the commissioner had given him, he didn't feel like he was being caged in. Most of the time, he figured out how to shut himself off and to focus on the details and the job. Others… it was a little more difficult.

The man in the pictures had been murdered executioner style with a kill shot to the head at close range. The victim would have been at the mercy of his killer. There was blood spatter on the floor, the walls… all standard stuff. But the most curious thing about the scene was the note that had come with it.

"Hey." Soobin lifted his head up from the folder and pictures. A figure in lean, armored red and black touched down onto the roof with his grappling hook, feet as light as a feather. Beomgyu also had a domino mask fitted to his face to hide his identity. He made his way toward his brother, his black cape moving with his footsteps. "What'd he give you?"

Soobin shifted the images slightly so Beomgyu could tilt his head and see for himself. "That was quick."

"Yeah, Palmer didn't fuckin' show up," Beomgyu grumbled.

Soobin clicked his tongue, shaking his head. "Guess we can say bye to him, then."

He grunted. "We better. If he comes crawling back, you're dealing with him because I'm not wasting another nicely ironed suit again for that idiot. Or Alfred's time, for that matter."

Soobin could get behind that.

"What the fuck's that?" Beomgyu picked up the photocopy of the note.

Right. That. It was a simple piece of paper, but with the words "A Debt Repaid" typed in large letters and basic sans serif font. There was a bit of the victim's blood on it, but that was expected. The note had been dusted for prints, but as expected, none were lifted. Based on this, it might have been a crime of passion, especially since this mayoral candidate would have made lots of political enemies. But looking at the method of death, there was something still detached about it.

Majority of the signs pointed to an assassin—a skilled killer of sorts, probably for hire. What Soobin couldn't hit the mark with was why? A Debt Repaid, was the supposed "explanation." But why? Who decided this man had offended someone so badly that he deserved to die? Soobin didn't like researching politicians, but politicians were so easy to dig up shit on. And if they deserved it (as most did), finding the shit and exposing them for it was always a job well-done in his books.

Justice, after all.

"A note from the killer," Soobin said plainly.

Beomgyu considered it for a moment. "Why does it look familiar to me?"

His brother turned to him. "Huh?"

"It just looks familiar for some reason. Maybe déjà vu or something," he dismissed with the flick of his hand.

"Mm." Soobin stared at the lifeless eyes of the mayoral candidate. His name was Lee Sungjae. He had a wife, three children, a house in the suburbs. And he was dead.

Guess he had some research to do. Soobin balked though; he really didn't like politicians.

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tr3xinfinite · 2 months

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Ok so finally here's my opinion about the Jim/Troll!Jim situation

I'm gonna try to be fast so maybe i will left a few details

First of all what i think about him becoming a Troll?

I think it was a great twist, not many shows are brave enough to make a whole almost permanent change in the MCs like TH did, Amphibia, The Owl House, Gravity Falls, Avatar, etc. I can't think of many shows where at the end the mc is forced to sacrifice his humanity and his normal life in order to gain a bigger power enough to save the people he loves (not to mention the bathtub scene is actually a MASTERPIECE of scene) hell even 3Below and Wizards didn't do this

Could have been executed better? Mmm maybe if Jimhunters was actually a Part 1/2 episode and Angor Reborn was adapted so we could have more screentime to Tol boi and his development

Do i think what Merlin did was right? I'm gonna be kinda gray but he was and at the same time not right, he destroyed Jim's life since the moment the amulet was held into his hands or should i say the peak of the iceberg (cause everything went downhill since Angor's debut) but at the same time he got a point, Jim's humanity was his biggest help it was his heart what tied into all the people he helped and who helped him, but that wasn't enough, his humanity started being his weakness by the end of Season 2 if Jim battled a whole Gumm-Gumm army + Gunmar + Angor + Morgana yeah he definetly couldn't have make it, Angor only died cause he sacrificed himself, Morgana was throw into another dimension and not exactly killed and Gumm-Gumms were gone along with Gunmar, but almost all of that was possible thanks to Jim's sacrifice, damn even one of the comics shows and alternate timeline where Jim dies in the eternal night

And i think that was an unavoidable situation, Merlin practically manipulated Jim to make 1 choice not 2, the Deep showed a Non-human Jim (not exactly TrollJim but maybe a glimpse of him) and there's also the amount of foreshadowing around it, and i don't think the line "Don't worry mom, you don't need to protect me, i think this is what i was meant to do" in the transformation scene was a random choice of words hell even Hunter Jim warned him.

Do i think Guillermo didn't have enough balls to let him be a troll for the whole franchise? Mmmm no, if Guillermo really didn't have balls to do it he wouldn't even turned Jim into a troll to begin with besides where talking about the same madman who make Wizards a whole kill count of 10 episodes

Now for the point i wanna talk here is

what do i think about Jim turning back to human?

Let's do one thing first, separate Human Jim from Troll Jim as if they were different characters

Human Jim was the original Jim a happy boy who was happy to help his mama, hang with his friends and tried his beat into saving humankind and trollkind while trying not to skip school days

TrollJim was the most depressed and conflicted state Jim was in his life, he couldn't go in the sunlight, couldn't eat human food, was separated from his friends only having Claire and Blink, was almost killed by the Green Knight, locked in a crystal by Merlin, the shard was aiming for his heart, he got to fight another war while being phisically at his most painful state and then he knew that no matter what he tries the Onyx will eventually kill him which leads me to believe that maybe Jim turning into a full Troll to fight Arthur was an attemp to do a "Suicide by Cop"

Human Jim was the warrior he became a new "light" for all the earth, Troll Jim was the warrior Merlin wanted him to be he "eclipsed" himself

TrollJim's main reason to exist was to kill Gunmar, Angor and Morgana and save everyone from the Eternal Night, notice how after killing Gunmar and after Angor's death TrollJim was slowly "dying" when he meet Arthur.

Then he turns himself into Beast Jim turning into a pseudo Gumm-Gumm, Jim was at his most feral, confused and most uncontrolable state, even his soul ended up corrupted, the happy Jim and tragically heroic TrollJim that we knew died in that moment all what's left was "that beast"

And what happens after Morgana (the last reminisence of the eternal night, the reason why TrollJim was born) dies not so after Jim also dies, notice what i'm trying to say? Born to defeat Gunmar, Angor and Morgana? And just after Morgana's death he finally dies too? I'm not trying to say that Jim needed Morgana to die to be human again what i'm trying to say is that with M finally dead he's free from the Eternal Night, Human Jim came back and is now with his friends a second chance his "resurrection".

After all that suffering, being born to fight a war and being turned into a monster TrollJim can finally rest in peace and leave the rest to Human Jim

I see this whole thing as a rebirth of Jim and as a way to let TrollJim rest cause he could finally ended his purpose (even if he wasn't exactly the one who killed Morgana)

For an example to this i have Ken Kaneki and Haise Sasaki, the same being but not the same person, Haise was just a happy dream of Ken and once he finally accepted that, he "died" and let Kaneki regain his body, the difference is that the Ken and Haise thing was literal while the Jim and TrollJim thing is more of my POV (now you get why i used Haise and Kaneki as a reference for the fan art)

But anyways that's just my opinion, but everyone can have their own interpretations

So in short: Jim regaining his humanity was like a second chance of living while TrollJim dying was a way to set him free

#toa trollhunters #jim lake junior #tales of arcadia #jim lake jr #analysis #thread #troll jim #Beast Jim

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fantastic-nonsense · 2 years

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I think a lot about The Bathroom Scene™ and how Kaz's selfless actions towards Inej are contrasted with their discussion about whether he's any different from Pekka, but Chapter 26 as a whole also does a lot to show how much Kaz cares about all of his Crows and not just Inej. He spends a lot of time in that chapter thinking about how he's probably about to die, and yet he does everything in his power to make sure his Crows get out alive.

He specifically zeroes on Inej's safety, of course (because when isn't Kaz focused on her?) but his actions, dialogue, and internal monologue are all entirely centered around how guilty he feels for getting everyone into this mess and how desperate he is to make sure he's the only collateral damage of his own scheme at the end of the day:

Kaz sits down and (more or less) fully explains his entire plan to the Crows instead of keeping them in the dark

Kaz gives Jesper's dad the only protection he's still able to give: his own family's name and reputation

Kaz ruminates on why he called Jesper by his brother's name and implicitly acknowledges that it's because he's scared to recognize Jordie in Jesper (that he's afraid to lose another brother)

Kaz thinks "But they’d landed in a trap, and if he had to chew his paw off to get them out of it, then that was what he would do."

Kaz pays off Inej's contract by liquidating "every asset he had" and explicitly tells her "I don't want you to be beholden to Per Haskell. Or me."

Kaz tells Inej about his emergency money stash and charges her with getting everyone out of the city safely if he doesn't come back from the Slat

Kaz tells her "Whatever happens to me, survive this city. Get your ship, have your vengeance, carve your name into their bones. But survive this mess I’ve gotten us into."

Kaz leaves on a suicide mission, telling Inej not to follow, because if he's going to die he wants to be the only one in active danger

And of course Kaz had already offered to serve himself up on a silver platter to the stadwatch and give them a way out even before he came up with the auction plan (though we don't get Kaz's point of view of The Clocktower Fight, I suspect it's also why he picked that fight with Jesper: he knew Jesper would never leave him to die unless he made him mad enough to "walk away" for once in his life).

What separates Kaz from other Barrel Bosses like Pekka isn't just that he would never sell a person or con/otherwise harm children. It's that at his lowest, when all the bravado and scheming and masks are stripped away, Kaz chooses to put himself on the line and sacrifice his own safety over putting his people in any more danger than they have to be. Because despite his ruthlessness and casual assholery, Kaz simply doesn't have it in him to watch those he cares about get hurt if he can prevent it. He ended Chapter 26 saying he intended to leave damage behind when he's gone, but also spent the entirety of the Geldrenner chapters spending time and effort and money he didn't have to minimize the damage as much as possible for his friends (his new family) if the worst should happen to him.

So he gives them a safe place to land where the gangs won't find them. He tries to push them away and make them mad enough that they won't grieve him when he dies. He gives them multiple ways out even if none of those options guarantee his own safety. He gives them money and as much safety as he can provide with the whole city out for their blood. He gives Inej her freedom. And he gives them time to rest, recharge, and prepare for whichever plan they end up doing while he goes off to stage a coup he's not sure he'll come back from.

This is all to say: Kaz could never be Pekka, no matter how tough of a game he talks about burning everything to the ground, because Kaz cares too much to ever become Pekka. Even as he continues to pretend not to care about anything but the money, his love for his city and his Crows are baked into every one of his thoughts and actions in those chapters. Unlike Pekka, who flees first Ketterdam and then Kerch entirely when his son is in (percieved) danger, Kaz stays to fight for the city he bent to his will. And unlike Per Haskell, who lets other people do his dirty work and sells out at the first opportunity for glory, Kaz puts himself on the front lines first even when doing so comes at a great cost to himself.

Pekka chases money and power for their own sake. Per Haskell chases money and power for the decadence, glory, and laziness it allows him to get away with. Kaz chases money and power because he knows what it's like to be powerless and wants to, in his own weird way, protect others from suffering his trauma and himself from losing anyone else he cares about. And that's why even at his most unhinged Kaz could never become Pekka Rollins: his quest for power and fame and riches comes from a fundamentally different place. Kaz Brekker doesn't need a reason, but he has at least six at all times during the course of the duology (the Crows+Jordie)...and while those reasons are often filtered through his two primary reasons (revenge for Jordie and Inej's freedom, safety, and happiness), none of them are ever far from his mind.

#six of crows #crooked kingdom #kaz brekker #soc meta #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #nina zenik #matthias helvar #grishaverse #kanej #otp: on the seas and in the city #CHAPTER 26 MY BELOVED #yes I'm going insane thanks for asking #kaz is very selfish when it comes to money and vengeance #but he is repeatedly and remarkably selfless when it comes to PEOPLE #(thinking about his offer to give himself up to the stadwatch while saying that he KILLED WYLAN #which would have kept Wylan SPECIFICALLY safe from his father in a way that also ensured a very painful end for Kaz)#(which segues into an unwritten meta I have on Kaz believing in the power of love and family even tho he pretends not to but anyway)

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subdee · 11 months

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There seems to be a consensus that Gon wasted his life/potential for meaningless revenge, but was it? I keep wondering if CA was HxH equivalent of the Kobayshi Maru (Aka the Trolley Problem). Pitou was, of all the RG, probably the most capable in terms of balanced nen users. What would’ve happened if Gon had listened to reason? And let adults handle it? Or let Killua accompany him? Not used a nen contract? How many additional casualties would there have been? Was it really meaningless sacrifice?

Hi anon! Thanks for the ask! I don't know if you're the same anon from before, but this is another great question!

I think Gon's choices in the CA arc are tragic, which is different from saying they are meaningless.

*It's a tragedy that a thirteen-year-old kid felt so guilty for "causing" an adult mentor's death that he could come to the conclusion "I'm OK if it all ends after this" (the wording on his nen contract) because he wanted revenge on Pitou / to punish himself so badly.

*It's a tragedy that his best friend (Killua) could sense that he would probably do something gonzo and, in the worst case scenario, it would be a "double suicide" (indicating he did know Gon might throw his life away) AND YET even knowing this, he didn't feel it was his place to step in and stop it.

*It's a tragedy that Netero, Morel and Knov all knew that Gon was revenge-crazed and emotional, but they were so desperate for manpower (in the moment) that they didn't look too hard at his motives, or try too hard to stop him from coming along

*And it's a tragedy that Gon (and Killua) had the most potential for nen of anyone Wing had ever taught, but Gon used all of that potential up at once - although as Ging says, he should have died, so he should actually be happy about the outcome.

So I think when people say "meaningless" what they're really talking about is that sense of tragedy - both the tragedy that Gon almost lost his life, and the tragedy that he was willing to go that far in the first place. It's more the sense of how much was lost than that it was lost for no reason, probably along with the fact that Kite like... was alive... the whole time....

But meaningless is something different, because just as you said, what Gon did really was necessary to stop the ants. You know? The way the story is written, the RG and Meruem are so powerful that it's kind of implied that stopping them will need a miracle - all the pieces need to fall into place just so. What Gon did is a part of the puzzle so, therefore, what Gon did was necessary, and without him there they wouldn't have succeeded.

(Or maybe they would have, but that would have needed another, different kind of miracle - or maybe for Netero to be less selfish and set off that bomb sooner!)

There are two kinds of tragedy, by the way: in classic tragedy, like for instance in Greek tragedies, the tragedy is that the outcome couldn't have been any different from what it was. Because of Gon's reckless nature, because of how the story has been progressing so far where he's done increasingly more reckless things and never had to really deal with the consequences, therefore this final reckless decision was inevitable and that's tragic.

Or, in the more modern version of a tragedy, the tragedy is that things could have gone differently. Gon didn't have to give up his life to stop Pitou, he could have been stopped much earlier. And I've written about this before, but the point where this could have happened wasn't once the palace invasion team was already in East Gorteau, split up to sneak in.

Instead it would have been about a month earlier, when Gon and Killua first escape from Pitou.... Because on the one hand, Netero, Morel and Knov decided that Gon and Killua were old enough for the mission; and on the other hand, they didn't take Killua's account of the RG's power level seriously enough to call in more serious backup, when they still had the chance.

So I think the tragedy, the "meaninglessness," really happens there.

But, on the other hand - I mean, who really would have had the power to stop Pitou anyway? Gon after the nen contract is as powerful as any Hunter in the association. Who can even say if, after calling in the supposed "serious" backup, things would have gone any differently?

Actually it's even darker if you think about it - Knov and Morel essentially agree to let Gon and Killua come along because they underestimate the enemy, the same reason Kite let them come along.

But Netero knows Killua a lot better, and I don't think he disbelieves Killua at all. I think he knows the other reason the invasion team is small - to keep extra people from being caught in the blast if he has to use the rose bomb, in case the plan to use Zeno's power to separate the king and the RGs doesn't come off correctly.

I think he's swayed by Gon's determination - and Killua's, by extension - and he takes the Hunter approach of letting Hunters decide for themselves what they're Hunting, without stepping in to coddle or regulate. (HxH is a bit libertarian like that, in its outlook). And he does that knowing full well they could be blasted to smithereens. That's why in election arc, there's so much talk about reforming the Hunter Association to be less in Netero's (crazy) image.

But anyway, getting back to your question... no, I don't think what Gon did was meaningless at all. "Revenge has meaning, but you won't feel better after you get it" is a slightly different meaning from "revenge is meaningless" and "revenge is meaningless" is a cliche anyway, which isn't really how the writing in HxH works.

#hxh #hxh meta #hope this makes sense baby just went down for the night and there's company over #anon #reply #thanks for the ask #mwah!

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soragawanaeru · 5 months

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NEXOCEMBER 2023 DRABBLE - DAY O3 : MONSTERS

Welcome back to my NEXOCEMBER attempt, yeah. So about monster... I think about Grey Knight because that really interest me. I maybe had some misunderstanding for Grey Knight, but I swear it's because of my slow brain responses. I'll try to getting it as close as canon with my understanding. But I tell you this is not about a real monster, but... Other type of it. (SPOILER : It's your own mind and life, wooo yeahhh)

And IDC if you saw word human for this story, because think that as anthromorphing bla bla.

Like usual, English is not my main, not beta read. Set after Season 4 but have some flashbacks during S1 - S3 because I want to. But this time I gave some warning because this is quite dark story and have questionable contents. READ THE END NOTES TO UNDERSTAND WHY I MAKE THIS.

TW // Suicidal-ish Thoughts, Depression Interpretation

If you feel one of that, please contact a professional help, because your life is precious. ^^

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

CW or TW (?) // FAKE WEAPON, FAKE BLOOD, FAKE ALL

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Clay Moorington was human, according to his appearance. Hair, face, body, arms, legs, that's human had. Clay was determined, selfless, desired for honor and justice, would sacrifice just to help everyone in need, smart, hardworking, and destined to be a leader. He's definited as perfect type of human, he's almost flawless, in both appearance and mannerism according to almost Knighton people who knew him. But according to Clay himself, he didn't know at all. If he's a human or a living monster.

At first he thought himself like that, he's a human, had dreams to be the knight to protect Knighton, he had role into that and played that desperately. But according to time, it just like... Confusing. He had human appearance, but he acted like a robot (or puppet ?) sometimes--repetitive, monotone, and endless. But it's okay, he just did that, he didn't mind, if that was the best choice.

But the more he did, the more confusing Clay thought about himself. His mind sometimes were poisoned with some negative thoughts like a fringed iris flower, ate him whole, and sometimes a force in his mind begged him to stop eating his dreams.

Clay felt like fighting lava monsters or stone monsters was quite nothing than the monsters in his mind, non-existent yet really controlled him. He didn't know why but that's... Awful.

After he turned into stone, Clay couldn't feel anything. Only stabbing coldness, and the noise of the voices in the city just echoes within his head. He sometimes ask the gaps in-between his 'dreams' that where should he go now, it seems like there's no prospect of recovery anymore.

After being alive again but as living statue that struck by Monstrox' thunder, his mind is hazy, only remembered that 'He must obey Monstrox' order and purge the one who defy him' like that. Just like a puppet in a damn theatre, controlled to be used for someone's benefit.

Sometimes he can heard voices that sounded like him sobbing, that Clay Moorington was there and begged to be noticed out. But nobody could hear or even understand that. Like his mind was falling deeper and became the gloomy water of the big ocean.

When he finally regained some conciousness, he felt endless throb in his head, his soul was like everyone's -- in the bitter suffering. He felt less human anymore, even stated himself -- a human named Clay Moorington was no more, only a monstrous living statue named Grey Knight. That conclude something -- he fell deeper into despair and anger, he was no longer belong to Knighton anymore.

After he regained his human form and realised he had magic power, everyone could say that Clay was glad that he's back to his usual. But reality said the opposite, that's the irony. As each day passed, whenever Clay saw himself in the mirror, he asked himself that was he ugly and fear really vanquished into his spine.

When everyone asked 'How are you? How it is going?' or 'Oi you, how are things?' like that, Clay just smiled politely and said he was fine, just for people did not ask anything about him anymore.

Ah, he just want to turned back like before, to be himself. He mumbled, "I want to be alive," but in his mind said that he didn't want to be alive anymore, but whatever it was he really just... Lived like that, written in a Bible that named DNA. He's tired of salvating because he didn't believe in salvation anymore.

As time goes, he surrendered and blamed that was truly his fault. He had enough but he had no courage to run away. That's typical type of story.

What the worst is, every aspect in Clay's inside was not human. He once had a stone heart, and he wanted to disinfect it in alcohol to sleep. If the world is a damn theatre, then he must have a role even to fulfill his emptiness of his heart. Each breathing felt like the air grabbed his throat every night.

When he found out that he's part of the wizardy and was the son of Ruina Stoneheart -- the witch that he hated so much, it suffocated him more, reality caved in his lungs. He felt like monsters, the ghost that behaves like a human from wanting a smile. He felt empty and hard to breathe each day passed by.

He felt sorry for deceiving everyone -- Macy, Lance, Axl, Aaron, Merlok, Ava, Robin, and many more, that he couldn't live up properly according to everyone's expectations because of course, he didn't know how to fight properly. Also he also felt sorry for not telling them, that's kinda sad. But suffering was the bond for his life. He was eaten by his own wrath and he asked himself, why it still hurts, everything.

If this was the price that he must pay, why Clay felt that was too much cruelty for him. His mind screamed, to gave him name to called by because he didn't know anymore if he was Clay Moorington or Grey Knight anymore.

After all he just wanted a future, to end his self-made theatre and one day, he could open his eyes and found the light that sure exist in 25:00 someday. He just wanted to let it end quickly and live in that moment that happened now, that's all.

┗━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━┛

Do you know that I got inspirations by PROJECT SEKAI commisioned songs? Samsa (ZAMUZA) by Teniwoha, NOMAD by Keina Suda, Theatre (ENGEKI) by Nanou. Also a VOCALOID song like GEHENNA by Wotaku. IDK why, but yeah, I recommend you to listen them and find what the song talked about.

I just want to say that monsters not only from physical, but monsters can exist in our mind, and ironically, that happens to me. Sorry, but from this, do you think I need therapy? Reason why I used Clay here because when I saw Clay's progress for each series, I started to question myself, how's Clay mental state actually? Like how he looked stable and what the hell happened when he was struck by Monstrox and turned into Grey Knight etc. And wooo... Why I put my depression there?!

(And also, Clay is my fav in NK and I like to torture my fav into suffering if I make any fic so sorry)

Anyway, feedback always welcomed because I wanna know how it was. (Because I know this is absurd OMG)

#nexo knights #lego nexo knights #nexocember

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lya-dustin · 9 months

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All is Bliss

Chapter 28

cw: attempted murder(possibly really just regular murder), depression, suicide, suicidal thoughts, Aegon’s post Rook’s Rest injuries, mentions of past sexual assault, implied ritual sacrifice, infanticide

Taglist: @mercedesdecorazon @darylandbethfanforever9 @watercolorskyy @ewanmitchellcrumbs @aemondx @sweethoneyblossom1

Gif by @barbieist

No one save for the maesters, the queen mother and the lord hand are allowed to see him.

Aemond is kept out of there because they doubt his loyalties, Aemma is too unwell, and there have been instances where a servant or two has tried to off him.

“In the case of King Aegon perishing from his injuries, what would be the course of action?” Wylde asks the question the rest fear asking in front of his mother.

“I will wed his widow, open talks with the rebels and share the regency with lords of their choosing as well as with the boy’s mother until he is of age.

Should the boy die with no issue or his mother suffer a miscarriage, the succession will be secured as I am next in line and unlike my brother, have no issue stopping me from impregnating my future wife.” His words are met with a scoff from his lady mother.

“I raised no son, I see, I raised a vulture.” She comments and he tries his best not to roll his eye at her.

She always took his side, when he bullied him, she’d allow it so long as it happened behind closed doors.

He loves his mother, but her love always felt conditional.

Like she might stop loving him if he ever rose against his brother.

“Men with such injuries often perish or take their own lives, your grace, it would not hurt to be prepared.” Tyland Lannister says in his defense. “Prince Aemond must be prepared to secure the succession without giving time for the rebels to install Queen Aemma.”

“Princess Aemma, she was never crowned as his consort.” His grandsire corrects, but refuses to speak more than that.

His reputation and ego suffered quite the blow when he was dismissed and his replacement won them the battle.

“Had she been crowned as it was her due, perhaps this would have been avoided. Most believe she rebelled because she was ignored and the king’s whore paraded about in her place.” Grand Maester adds, in defense of Aemma and perhaps because he was known to harbor sympathies with the Blacks.

He and Beesbury had been opposed to the usurpation, only Beesbury was not so important as to be kept alive.

“She rebelled because we killed my half-sister by crowning Aegon on top of the humiliations my beloved elder brother had already heaped on her.

Even if we could crown her, it would not fix anything. Her supporters know her claim is greater than all of ours combined.” Aemond shook his head.

“The babe killed your sister, your sister who is the reason you have no eye and had no justice from your father that night.” His mother reminds him.

It was her bastard son who did it, he’d like to correct.

Bastards she protected the way I now protect mine.

Now that he is to be a father, he came to understand why Rhaenyra said and did what she did.

Because he would do the same.

“The babe was covered in dragon scales, with no heart and filled with maggots. If I remember my history correctly, Tyanna of the Tower poisoned Maegor’s wives so all the babes would be born like that.

Prince Daemon claims it was the work of a witch, and I am inclined to believe him.” Aemond hates the turn this has taken, but he needs them to find who hired Alys to kill Rhaenyra.

He suspects his mother.

Her sudden closeness to the witch that called him the One-Eyed King once made him suspect her of Rhaenyra’s murder.

While he hated his sister, he loves Aemma and he would imprison his own mother to keep her and the babe from dying.

What is your mother to your own son, after all?

“Everyone knows Maegor was cursed for kinslaying.” Cole says in defense of the queen.

Knowing damn well the only two people here who could have hired the witch was her half-brother and the queen she now serves.

But Cole thinks mother a goddess like the Seven Who Are One, the Mother and the Maiden rolled up in one.

A woman who can never do wrong.

A woman who could never kill another even for a what she believes may have been an honorable reason.

“Lady Laena died the same way, the babe was malformed and described the same as its half-sister, the Triarchy boasted of having hired a shadowbinder from Asshai to kill her and weaken him.

As Lord of Harrenhal and head of House Strong, I would hand over our prime suspect to the Faith and prevent such misfortune falling upon King Aegon’s only heir.” Larys finally speaks up, hardly speaks unless it is of great importance or offer a sordid deal.

It shouldn’t surprise him, House Strong had been whittled down to Larys, his elder sisters, Ida and Ada, and the cause of their family’s extinction and the burning of their seat: Alys Rivers.

“No, you cannot. Alys merely miscarried the babe the night the king died. Prince Daemon still has many enemies, any of them could’ve done it.” His mother dismissed it as madness and sought to change the topic.

But she has never been subtle even when not backed into a corner, and now they have the confirmation they needed for it.

She hired Alys to kill Rhaenyra and make Aegon king.

Alicent the Pious loved her children more than the gods themselves, she would do anything to save them.

No one could fault her, she was a mother after all, her council especially, she was a mother after all and gave them the power they so desperately wanted.

But his mother was becoming a liability.

She may be the reason her cause had something to rally behind, but her job was done when Aegon was made king.

It won’t be long before they turn against her and use Alys to kill two birds with one stone.

The state her beloved son is in breaks her heart every time she sees him.

Aegon woke up towards the end of the second week and cursed foully when shown his new reality.

The left side of his body burnt beyond recognition, steel of his armor still in whatever skin is left on his arm, his ribs and hip broken and left leg injured beyond repair. It was a gruesome sight.

“Let me die, gods-damn it.” He shouts at the maesters and her who denies him that mercy.

It is clear what she must do.

Aegon cannot live like this, her golden son cannot be this for the rest of his life.

For days she ponders whether it is worth whatever is left of her soul.

She asks the Mother for guidance, for strength to turn away from this, but the Mother does not respond.

The Crone does, silently telling her it is the only way.

“What must I pay to save him?” she asks her witch one morning while they watch little Ellyn Waters pray for her father in the Sept.

“I think you already know the price, your grace.” The witch answers and gestured to the nearly three-year-old girl at the feet of the Mother.

Ellyn Eversweet, called like her famed namesake and for the sweet smiles that look so much like the ones Aegon used to have when he was her sweet little boy.

Silvery golden waves like her and blue eyes so innocent it feels like a knife to her ever-blackening heart.

Any mother would do the same if they had the opportunity, the queen begins to tell herself as she asks her lover and curse for a solution to her son’s problems.

“She is a child!” she whispered in outrage at her own thoughts.

“His child, he gave her life and now she must give her his. It is the only way to save him.” The witch said as she lit a candle at the foot of her patron goddess.

“Do you think I would not have given my life for mine and my brother when you ordered them killed?”

“There has to be another way.” The queen tells herself and rejects her solution.

When she sees the chambermaid suffocate him with a pillow, Alicent knows she has no choice but to kill the child to save hers.

“She’s only a bastard,” she tells herself when she carries the sleeping girl and places her beside her dying father.

Aemma is better than she has been in this past fortnight.

She comes alive as her mind replayed those moments when Aegon stopped thrashing under the pillow as she and Enola the Chambermaid held it over his face.

He was dying, the guards had been alerted by Alicent’s presence in the other room and for her safety, Aemma was told to run.

It had come too easy and before the guilt over her first murder set in her bones, Aemma takes advantage of this sudden spark that ignites the fire in her blood.

Aemond is utterly oblivious as to what spurred this on.

He could never know.

He must never know.

She cannot take out this feeling on an opponent, but there is another way. Aemond was always hard as oak after a spar or an execution.

She needs him badly, so bad she cannot wait until dawn for this.

“What’s gotten into you?” he asks but does nothing to stop her. He does not mind being woken up this way, enjoys it or so he’s told her after.

“I couldn’t sleep, wanted to go for a walk, but then I remembered we never got to finish what we started that afternoon, would the prince regent like to finish what he started?” she lies with a sultry voice and a cunny wet enough to sell the lie.

Aemma has not been intimate with him since the Cargyll twins killed themselves. It has been little more than a fortnight since that afternoon and so much had happened.

It had taken a week to leave Dragonstone under capable hands, keep Aegon stable enough to return home and have the dead dragons prepared for travel. Four days and three nights because the wind and current disagreed with them and nine days and nine nights to devise a plan and execute it.

Her courage had nearly failed her, until she saw a chambermaid hiding a knife with the same objective as her.

He raped Dyana, she whispered and the queen nodded in understanding.

There was no going back after that.

In the end, Enola the chambermaid, took her knife, slit her own throat open and the truth died with her.

“We did not.” He gives her a groggy smile before helping sit on his gloriously made face.

Between the pleasure and the thrill of her first and final kill, Aemma feels the clouds leave and the sun shine again.

It all comes crashing down the next morning.

“The king is awake.”

#aemma velaryon #aemond targaryen x velaryon!oc #aemond x rhaenyra and laenor's! daughter #aemond targayen x oc #ewan mitchell #alicent hightower #alys rivers/alicent hightower #ocappreciationtag #all is bliss(in the court of aemma the great) fic #all is bliss fic

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tyrannuspitch · 9 months

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"know your place, brother" and how loki treads lightly around thor while thor threatens and manhandles him in ways that are never reciprocated even once they're firmly enemies and how loki isn't allowed to speak when thor and odin are arguing no matter how deferential he is and how odin tells thor he's "unworthy of his loved ones" like he's confiscating a piece of property while loki looks on in silence and how loki calls himself "stolen" and speaks of being "used" for a "purpose" and how loki screams about wanting to be thor's equal and bows sarcastically before their fight but his defeat still comes down to odin not judging him worthy of "the power of thor" in the end and how loki comes back from the dead feverishly and desperately trying to frame his "new purpose" as a good thing but still calling freedom "life's great lie" and how the exhibition in stuttgart is called "conquest and sacrifice" and loki is both of those things and "you're going to lose, it's in your nature" and "in the end you will always kneel" and how odin and frigga can never tell loki that they love him only "you're my son" which is just another expression of possession and how being odin and frigga's son is a lie that loki's whole life is built on but it's burrowed right down to his core and how when he challenges it frigga tells him she (still) knows him better than he knows himself and how odin tells loki "your birthright was to die" meaning that because he saved his life as a baby loki has no rights and even his hatred of odin isn't truly his own but also just meaning that loki should die, it's his purpose, it's what he's for and how even AFTER that loki gives his life to save the future king of asgard not once but two separate times it's SICK it's fucking NAUSEATING why do people not SEE IT!!!

#space viking tag #[screaming]#tagging this who give a shit ->#loki laufeyson #loki odinson #woe. feverish ravings be upon ye #meta #ch: loki #th: servant loki #th: abuse + empire #th: suicide + sacrifice #t: manipulation + mind control #r: loki + thor #r: loki + odin #r: frigga + loki #th: fate + hierarchy #highlights

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selamat-linting · 7 months

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Hello Actually I would like to hear your thoughts on Gin Minowa 😊

well alright you did ask :) but beware this is mostly going to be unstructured rambling.

anyway, her death basically caused the taisha to upgrade the hero system, introducing mankai and giving the girls immortality at the cost of their own bodies, thats the main conflict of the first season of yuyuyu. it drove togou into despair because she lost the memory of her friendship with gin and sonoko and will probably lose her new friends again to a fate worse than death that she's willing to end the world just to stop it all. and we all know how that eventually caused the wedding of the shinju and yuna and basically everything else. also, her death spurred the taisha to actively recruit more girls to be grinded into the hero system, so her death is also responsible for karin to join the hero club and the rest of the sentinel squad to be formed.

like, gin minowa's impact is massive. she's genuinely haunting the narrative. my first exposure of the yuyuyu franchise is the anime, and even without knowing her name, or seeing her grave, the traces of her life and death is everywhere. karin is using her terminal!!! sonoko and togou's entire friendship during the second season hinges on their mutual guilt complex over gin's death. hell, togo does not remember gin at all in the first season, but she knows she lost her and thats enough to kickstart togo's murderous rage and despair.

also thematically, she really is the poster girl of a human sacrifice. i've seen a meta post somewhere about how the shinju and the mankai system can be read as an allegory of how women ultimately commit slow suicide from making themselves small and palatable for the male gaze and doing all of the invisible labour for the sake of patriarchy. and the way yuyuyu keeps portraying in universe that being a hero is a way to protect the country, spesifically using a rather political word like the country, not humanity or life itself, it reminds me a lot of how fascist propaganda present itself to women. conform to the gender binary, fulfill your god given role, sacrifice your body and your life for the sake of your society. it seems familiar. the magical girls are chosen yes, but theyre lambs to the slaughter in the service of the shinju and the taisha (patriarchy metaphor)

disclaimer, im not japanese, and i dont know the behind the scenes trivia or the author or even played the yuyuyu games, so i know im working off partial information and im looking at something with a perspective unlike my own, im well aware i could be wrong and the authors' intentions might be different, but that is what i get from the anime. the metaphor did fell apart towards the last few episodes, especially when we consider the taisha was formed because they have to survive against the apocalypse, they might be a corrupt and fucked up organization that grinds children into an eternal suffering machine but they did try their best against an impossible situation, but overall i do feel like the hero system can be read as a metaphor for gender roles in patriarchy.

back to gin minowa, out of the trio, she seems to be written as the most down to earth / relatable of the two. she's smart and clever, but only when its useful to other people, i.e when she's helping and when she's fulfilling her role as a child soldier. and she never ever blames anyone for anything. nobody ever stops to ask if she has better places to go, nobody ever asks if she's tired from all the help and chores she's required of doing, and she never seems to mind. only smiling and blaming herself for being late and forgetting her studies. its only her friends who actually find out whats going on with her and tried to help her. she is the picture perfect idea of a heroine and the taisha and the shinju took advantage of it and it ultimately killed her. she is the number one proof that this is the bitter end of all magical girls if they let themselves follow the orders thats been given to them. god fucking damn it, theyre all heroes, they's the chosen one, but theyre chosen as a hero the way a lamb is chosen and lead to the slaughter. rip gin minowa you will always be famous 😭

#asks #yuyuyu #yuuki yuuna wa yuusha de aru #yuki yuna is a hero #gin minowa

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moondragon618 · 1 year

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Okay actually I want to talk abt the shit takes regarding the finale bc. Wtf.

In particular, there's this idea I keep seeing that c!Prime were both doomed and there was never any hope for them, and they were destined to destroy each other, etc. etc.

First of all, c!Dream was the instigator of like 90% of the conflict on the server and was always the one escalating things and the shit he did was just. Not even comparable to c!Tommy, but that's a whole other thing and I want to focus on the c!Tommy takes bc holy shit /neg

I'll start with the most annoying type that I've seen: Hero Complex aka c!Tommy was too obsessed with stopping c!Dream bc he can't view him as anything other than The Villain, and the whole him understanding c!Dream's motives thing is him "finally breaking free of his worldview" and this is supposed to be closure ig. But it was already too late at that point bc c!Tommy had already taken the hero thing too far and there was no going back.

You know, just. c!Tommy is deathly afraid of his abuser (who literally murdered him and also threatened to make his life a living hell for eternity) and this is a character flaw apparently.

Generally though it's just the idea that c!Prime were equally responsible for destroying the entire server (and the possibility of a real friendship between them) and the only option was for them to both die, get memory wiped, and then they can become friends and have a fresh start, and once again this is supposed to be closure ig bc they both just wanted to have friends. And the reason c!Tommy is equally responsible is bc he was too reckless/impulsive/traumatized/etc. and the whole nuke plan was that impulsiveness being his downfall. Nevermind the fact that it was literally a suicide and he did so believing that he was the cause of all the problems on the server and therefor he deserved it, and then he died still believing that.

But it's a good thing actually bc he recognized that he was equally responsible for everything bc he was too reckless and impulsive.

The absolute worst aspect of these takes though is the way c!Tommy's trauma is made out out to be this fatal character flaw. Like the whole "c!Tommy was too fixated on what c!Dream did to him and that combined with his impulsiveness was his downfall" and "c!Tommy couldn't let go of what c!Dream did to him and move on and it destroyed him" (bc it's not like he was horrifically paranoid bc c!Dream threatened to make his life a living hell and stalked him and psychologically tormented him or anything) and basically the implication that because of all that, death was the only option for him.

But it was a good thing actually bc c!Tommy lived and got a fresh start with no memories and that was the only way he could be happy again.

Like I really don't think that was the intended interpretation of the finale bc holy shit the implication there is that c!Tommy was too traumatized to live and the only way he could live happily was by having his memories wiped.

Like I suspect a lot of ppl are just not aware of how fucked up that is bc let's be real, it's unfortunately a common thing in media for traumatized characters to "find peace" or whatever by dying. Heroic Sacrifice my behated. And like this is definitely a problem with the finale itself too, but again I don't think the implications were intentional.

But also the aspect of "the only way c!Tommy could live happily was by having all his traumatic memories wiped" is just. It would have been impossible for him to ever heal and be happy despite his trauma ig? Or alternatively it was his own fault he destroyed himself bc he couldn't move on from his abuse (while believing his abuser was actively out to get him)? Like holy shit is that uncomfortable to see as an abuse victim who doesn't have the option of erasing all the traumatic memories. And also the fact that c!Tommy's death was a suicide on top of all that and. Ppl just ignore that part ig? Yeah it's not fun.

Anyway fuck that, fuck the idea that living with trauma is worse than death, and fuck the idea that abuse victims can't heal and be happy and that death is the only option. That is all <333

#whoops that got long #it's been annoying me since the finale though so yk #dream smp #dsmp #dsmp neg #discourse #tw abuse #tw suicide #tw victim blaming

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kaydeefalls · 6 months

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would love some director's commentary on basically any part of Carthaginians you'd like to talk about, but my favourite part was the second last chapter/the siege itself and I'd love to know how you worked out what trajectory to take the characters on through all the historical records. would also love to know more of your thoughts on Yusuf and Nico's backstory and families, if you have thoughts!

Thanks! <3 All right, Carthaginians, let's go.

The siege - or, more specifically, the final Fall of Carthage - was definitely what came first in terms of planning out this fic. When I first had the idea of writing Joe & Nicky's backstory further back in history, the Punic Wars were a logical setting to start with due to simple geography - Carthage being in modern day Tunisia, and Rome being, well, Rome.

So as with any vague idea, I started with a wikipedia deep dive, kind of assuming that I'd stick to the general canon template of them killing each other for the first time in battle and then becoming lovers afterward. But I immediately stumbled across the fact that Carthage's final stand, after the city had surrendered, consisted of about 900 Roman defectors in the Temple of Eshmoun setting the temple on fire around them rather than allowing Rome to execute them. Which. So that was obviously going to Nicky's arc. Which meant he would have to defect to Carthage much earlier on. Which meant I could give him and Joe a much richer relationship build over the course of the war itself. At that point, there was no question that their first deaths would be more of a suicide pact due to having no other options. I thought about having them, IDK, leap off the temple roof together or something, but nah, it felt much stronger to have them kill each other directly, as per canon, but with a complete subversion of what got them to that point.

I wrote chronologically and posted as I went, but it definitely helped going in to know exactly where they had to end up. For example, I deliberately seeded their exact dialogue together in the temple at the end of the siege as lines in their very first idle political debate in Rome in chapter one, so that Nicky could do a complete 180 on his initial stance in the debate by the end.

Embarrassingly, while that was all planned out from the beginning, I was WELL into the middle of the fic before realizing that, uh, Eshmoun is literally the god of healing. I mean, I knew that from the start, but I literally had my own personal OH DUH moment that they would be dying and resurrecting for the first time in the temple of the god of healing, and would OF COURSE think that Eshmoun himself had literally healed them due to their sacrifice on his own figurative altar. So that was an incredibly lucky piece of historical fact to tie into the immortality narrative.

In terms of their family backstories there - I think Yusuf's is about as fleshed out in the fic as it's going to be, it's all his POV and I included all the family info/dynamics I'd thought about. Nicky's didn't get as much detail in the fic, since we're never in his head and he didn't talk about it as much, but his family was the rough equivalent of landed gentry back in Genua - relatively high status for his own tribe, but doesn't mean much to the Roman Republic as a whole. They were granted Roman citizenship when the Genuates allied with Rome, and Nicky received a formal education, but their family wealth took a huge hit during the second Punic War (when Carthage sacked the city) and never really recovered, which is why Nicky left to join the Roman army and make his own fortune. I think he's not the oldest of his siblings - not the one expected to inherit and carry on the family legacy - but probably the second son, with several younger siblings in the mix as well. He has a strained relationship with his father and a better one with his mother, who I imagine died before he left home. He misses his younger sibs, who he helped raise, but never returns to Genua in their lifetimes.

So...yeah! I spent all year with the world of this fic in my head, it's been hard to let go of it. Thank you for asking!

#ask me anything #always a sucker for an askmeme #director's cut commentary #writing is hard

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yellowbluemoonshine · 7 months

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Any similarities between Shugen and Chobei?

Haven't seen it discussed before but it looks like some parellels can be drawn.

Aza Brothers & Shugen; Stories of Samurais

I think they are not really parallels of each others, other than being antagonist of the story. Chobe is parallels with Gabimaru, even though they are on opposite sides, they are smilar. Because they both are tragic character who does anything to protect the ones they love. And Shugen is parallels with Sagiri but in a way that they are different, even though they are supposed to be on same sides as yamada asaemons. But they are different because Sagiri questions what she believes in while Shugen is just a wall.

But even so, there is interesting connection between Shugen and Chobe and also Toma. Its not the connection between characters but what they represent. Its so interesting how author write samurais in his story. How their honor and pride was so important for them that it drives them insane.

First with Aza brothers backstory. There is a reference to historical event.

The revenge of the forty-seven rōnin (四十七士, Shijūshichishi),[2] also known as the Akō incident (赤穂事件, Akō jiken) or Akō vendetta, is a historical event in Japan in which a band of rōnin (lordless samurai) avenged the death of their master on 31 January 1703.[3] The incident has since become legendary.[4] It is one of the three major adauchi vendetta incidents in Japan, alongside the Revenge of the Soga Brothers and the Igagoe vendetta.[5] The story tells of a group of samurai who were left leaderless after their daimyō (feudal lord) Asano Naganori was compelled to perform seppuku (ritual suicide) for assaulting a powerful court official named Kira Yoshinaka. After waiting and planning for a year, the rōnin avenged their master's honor by killing Kira, knowing full well that the authorities would likely not tolerate this vendetta's completion and put them to death. Due to considerable public support in their favor, the authorities compromised by ordering the rōnin to commit seppuku as an honorable death for the crime of murder. This true story was popularised in Japanese culture as emblematic of the loyalty, sacrifice, persistence, and honor that people should display in their daily lives. The popularity of the tale grew during the Meiji era, during which Japan underwent rapid modernisation, and the legend became entrenched within discourses of national heritage and identity. (Source.)

In Jigokuraku story, basically their lord was punished and their ronin was also punished as well for their Lord's crimes. Chobei and Toma were basiclaly samurai's kids and they lost everything. Because of what happenned, they suddenly became poor which lead their mother to became sick and died. Their father tried to take revenge with other samurai friends and eventuall he was executed. As result, Chobei and Toma were left alone at streets.

This case also became their 'villain origin' story. Their entire motivation to become criminal (other than survival) is result of being traumatized by this event. It is very interesting to explore their reaction to this during the story.

They dont believe in justice and anything represent it. They dont care about honor or honesty anymore. They are literally bandits, opposite of samurais, they lie, they steal. Its almost like reflection of their hatred towards society and especially samurais or blowbacks of samurais' obeying orders without a question.

They dont believe in justice. Toma seems to be the silent type who accepts his fate when is in terrible sitution. Meanwhile, Chobe lash out and he is triggered whenever someone talk about 'punishment' or whenever he is reminded of 'samurais' to the point he accidently hurts his brothers. He said he hates people who blindly follow things without a question and he is his own god.

Freedom, making own decisions is very important concept to Chobei and i think it is something samurais (and even asaemons in story) lacks.

They care about things like honor and rules too much to the point they act injustice. Even someone kind person as Shion was about to kill Nuruga despite the fact that she is innocent, just because rules said otherwise. And Sagiri as someone who doubts, she is rising as heroine and she is connecting criminals and asaemons together.

The point is; Story is criticizing samurais obsession with certain rules to the point they act insane while it explore humanity of criminals and most of them are just victims who try to survive.

Chobei and Toma also seems to hate 'people gathering together'. Those two just stick together and there is always distance between them and other people.

Chobei says just two of them is enough and Toma literally says he hates group thing, while he is remembering his father gathering together with other samurais.

They love their father but they clearly traumatized by what happenned. They both see their father's death as abandonment. Their father chose his honor, his revenge, his samurai friends, 'justice' above his kids and his wife. And as response to that, Aza brothers decide to chose each others over everyone, every friends they could make, every revenge plot or even justice. Because Chobei and Toma, their father abandonded them. We can see in their narrative, that Chobei says 'I know Toma, i am not like our father. I will come back to you.' and when Chobei 'died' at the end, Toma says 'whats your difference than our father then'. Its like a code between them. They see any kind of separation as abandonment. Worst part of all of these is that they know that their father loves them but because of that happenned, they have serious abandonment issues.

Basically, every part of their character is connected to this event. Samurais world was so insane and unfair that kids of samurais became bandits result of it.

On the other hand, there is this Shugen who symbolizes everything wrong with samurais world. He is so obsessed with punishment, justice, honor, that he killed innocent family (including babies) to punish the criminals, he also killed his asaemon friend Fuchi.

This obsession with honor and justice can be said for other asaemons, samurais but Shugen is the most extreme one with his ways so yeah.

Apperantly, Shugen is reference Momotaro, popular hero of Japanese folklore. Author mentions this in his interview.

Momotarō was born from a giant peach, which was found floating down a river by an old, childless woman who was washing clothes there. The woman and her husband discovered the child when they tried to open the peach to eat it. The child explained that he had been bestowed by the gods to be their son. The couple named him Momotarō, from momo (peach) and tarō (eldest son in the family). When he was just five years old, he was able to cut a big tree with just an old knife. When he matured into adolescence, Momotarō left his parents to fight a band of Oni (demons or ogres) who marauded over their land, by seeking them out in the distant island where they dwelled (a place called Onigashima or "Demon Island"). En route, Momotarō met and befriended a talking dog, monkey and pheasant, who agreed to help him in his quest in exchange for a portion of his rations (kibi dango or "millet dumplings"). At the island, Momotarō and his animal friends penetrated the demons' fort and beat the band of demons into surrendering. Momotarō and his new friends returned home with the demons' plundered treasure and the demon chief as a captive. (Source.)

Shugen's story is also similar to this kid. His family was murdered and later, he became asaemon, proves his talents with blade. He is even given present by Shogun and he kills/punishes anyone who disobey the laws. This is shown in Jigokuraku novel too.

This is interesting because Momotaro is just a hero but Shugen is clearly written to be twisted and dark version of it. He is someone never doubts or questions his beliefs, the darkest side of asaemons. Because even just simple well intention might end up with something bad if you never think you might be the wrong one. Or if you dont have mercy or empathy. Shugen is also a tragic character who hates criminals because they killed his parents and eventually molded by samurais, this lead him to be righteous and obsessive and he also chose to not change despite tha fact that he made friends.

As bonus; Momotaro also kills demons/bandits and Aza brothers are kinda similar to Blue Demon and Red Demon, as two demons who was treated unfairly by normal people. More details in here.

So this is the connection i think they have. Its not the parallels. Its the story of samurais. And there is always a two sides to same story. Aza brothers who are criminals eventually turn out to be tragic villains, they become allies to their enemies because they change for better while characters like Shugen who is someone supposed to be hero eventually become enemy to his allies because he remains the same.

Story also explores the ideas of invidual vs greater good with their story. One would destroy the world to protect his brother, ıother one would kill his friend with the name of justice. Both ways are extreme but Chobei's (and Toma's) main motivation is love for one person and since his conection is real, a person, he can rise but in Shugen's case, his motivation is ideals, for bunch of invisible people that he has no connection with, instead of focusing people near him, he chose to ignore it for the sake of ideals, thats why he falls. Its interesting.

I wish we explore this side of story in more details, its very interesting, and deep, and fun.

#anon ask #jigokuraku #jigokuraku analysis #jigokuraku meta #aza chobei #aza chobe #aza toma #hells paradise #yamada asaemon shugen #jigokuraku parallels #yamada asaemon sagiri #gabimaru #sagiri #47 ronin #momotaros #samurai #tw trauma #aza brothers #hell's paradise

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