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mysteriouslybluepirate · 6 months

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Hey,

I just wanted to make sure: have you been in the ofmd fandom during s1 coming out? I'm very interested in meta from that time (I'm not asking for any links, I can search myself, don't want to bother you, unless you would like to recommend something, that would be great of course)

(Forgive any spelling errors for now, im in bed on my phone lol)

Hello! Yes I have! I started watching the show a few days after s1ep7&8 came out, and watched eps 9&10 the moment they came out!

During the early days of fandom meta, you had a lot of straight up show analysis. Songs, motifs, symbols and explaining characters actions and the like. Back then I don't think I ever posted, just reblogged some stuff relating to Ed/Stede.

For that, I'd recommend looking up the topics I listed from lighthouse symbolism, music in certain scenes. Bare bones, but fun stuff! The tags 'ofmd meta' 'Edward Teach meta' or character + meta. That or ofmd symbolism, ofmd mental health, Ed's heart(referencing the red cloth), Oranges, Oluwande's earing.

My biggest draw here is I just love characters and analyzing character arcs in stories. So I have always been on the more meta sides of fandom.

I started posting light meta for Ed and Izzy maybe around June ish of 2022? Maybe? Nothing big, but from then on I focused mainly in the Izzy spaces. FOR ME: I was more intrigued by the meta on the cycles of abuse, classism, refrences to historical piracy, and just sheer angst and heart and emotional honesty of the Meta on this side of the fandom. I grew up and still live in a very red very rural US state and cant safely be visibly queer, so i latched onto Izzy's caution around visable queerness/vulnerability and habit to cling onto the established norm vs. Stede and Ed's story on 'The Love Shack' Carribean eddition. (and the fact Izzy's side treated Ed and Stede like characters that COULD still make mistakes.)

Some fans prefer the romance of ofmd while others prefer the story of family/acceptance/angst. We as a fandom split pretty quickly after ep 10. Trust me.

I sadly can't recommend you anyone specific due to essentially texting this post rn (and if any fans at the time comment down below any notable meta writers they can remember, I'd appreciate it-im drawing a blank besides my mutuals-hell give yourself a shout out if youd like). What i can give you are the disagreements that split meta writing in the fandom during the hiatus. Hell some of these even have trickle-down effects to this day as to how the fandom portrays these characters TO THIS DAY. This is where I see the clear line between what ofmd fandom will call the Izzy 'canyon' of meta vs general fan posting.

1.) Did Izzy influence/order Ed to become the Kraken? [Ed meta: (to be a bit uncharitable) Ed felt like he was alone and he'd only be able to keep Izzy in his life is if he became the Kraken (or Izzy is somehow abusing Ed to make that choice to become the monster he feared)] [izzy meta: izzy wanted blackbeard back, his friend and captain, not the Kraken. He cares about Ed being safe, and for them, that means hiding behind the blackbeard shield. Even if it keeps them both stagnant]

2.) Does Ed want to kill? How does he frame killing? How does he moralize it? How does this trauma affect him as a character? How does he value the lives of his crew ('they're pirates, that's their job' s1ep4 vs his dad or the ship he lit on fire for example)

3.) Is izzy homophobic/racist/a colonist/more of a piece of shit beyond just being an antagonist(if i were you I'd also just stick away from a post if it seems like the writer is framing all of Ed's actions like Izzy is his 'puppet master controlling the strings'.)

4.) Why do Stede and Ed seem to struggle to care about anyone else in their lives beyond each other? (Not really popular outside of Izzy spaces unless discussing ADHD/AUTISM. Honestly I don't know how you'd look for this in a Tumblr search bar, but it's some good stuff)

5.) Edward Teach has Adhd/BPD/Depression or the cycle of abuse, Stede Bonnet has Autism/Adhd/emotional childhood neglect including some amazing meta on masking. I think I even wrote something about Izzy and autism actually....

If I were you this is where I'd start. The mental health discussions in this Fandom are intriguing. S2 did basically confirm the ADHD 100% for anyone who was doubting, and healed Ed's btd with stedes dick, but other than that. There's some really good stuff in there. An easy way to find some good writers!

>) ALSO: Does piracy represent masculinity?? (S1 says maybe, it depends. S2 throws that whole meta out the window, but it was fun to talk about equating Izzy and Ed's leather daddy ship and more masculinity presentations of queerness to traditional masc gender roles)

6.) Do you define Ed and his actions as his own or as that under labels? This one is super frustrating to me personally. It does nothing for me to look at s2ep1 and say 'see that's the Kraken, that's a mask, that's not Ed'. But a lot of the general wider fandom do see Ed masking as somehow putting on a role, like in a play, and carrying out his evil actions under a pseudonym. These people usually will also believe the 'Izzy is manipulating a mentally ill man' stuff. As if Izzy isn't also SUPER fucked up.

THIS lack of character direction affected our fandoms fanfic and fanart too. I look at Ed and see a man who is and has fucked up. But hell, go back to S1 fic and you can read a fic where izzy slaughters puppies and Ed stands by with 'sexy cow eyes' unable to stop him. Then the next read 'Ed/Stede slowburn post s1 where Izzy goes to get Stede and learns to be apart of the crew' in 40k words.

7.) Jim's religious trauma, what is up with Buttons, Lucius/Izzy and Polyamory dynamics, or other topics with side characters that are brushed off. I bet right now if you look at people writing S2 Frenchie trauma Meta, they wrote stuff for s1

8.) Also- was izzy turned on by the toe thing/getting slammed into a wall. Yes. This is still debated. As a con oneill fan, those are not his 'I'm hot for this' faces. But No. You will still see that interpretation today that he wanted Ed to do something to him only because he got off on it. Even after s2. (Izzy being a masochist however? Fan theory that was embraced and made into a refrence in s2 which was fun)

I've just rebloged a post with some meta from a writer I enjoy and I will tag you!! But yeah! OFMD mutuals if you can recommend any meta writers, don't be afraid to!! Thanks for the ask!!! ❤️(I will likely add to this post when I think of more lol)

#ofmd meta #ofmd meta meta #lol #izzy hands #ofmd s2 #thanks for the ask!#god...am i a meta writer now? shit...#weird to think about #you read 1 meta about Izzys microexpressions and BAM here we are #ofmd #ofmd s1 meta

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autism-purgatory · 2 months

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Thanks for the tag @illarian-rambling!

Wip Questionnaire (Grayguard Edition!)

Rules: answer as few or as many as you'd like!

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

The earliest concept in Grayguard is probably the Hellenistic kingdom of Cloria and its Oracle Queen, also the elemental mineral Oriche. Those two have been recycled through at least three scrapped stories before I put it in Grayguard.

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

The story is set into four acts, sooo

Act 1: Hollow Knight from the Hollow Knight OST

Act 2: Blue Desire (from Blazblue Chronophantasma)

Act 3: Iconoclast by KOTOKO

Act 4: Kuroi Uta from Drakengard 3

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

Not to be too spoilery (since Grayguard will be on AO3 at some point) But other than Emil and Lisa, a certain shapeshifter that appears in act 2 and an antagonist of Act 3, one is an absolute blast to write, the other is the best villain I’ve written in my opinion.

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

Probably Aurora fans and Zelda: BOTW/TOTK fans.

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

Honestly I’ve been mashing some plotlines together to make it run smoother because I CANNOT cram that many plot lines into a single act.

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

Chaos creatures aplenty, including Dragons, Watchers (eldritch Gorgons), Chimera (a result of creatures fusing their Chaos energy to melt into one being) also plenty of plain animals except really big with a few weird details (Deers with crystal horns, Bears with rock spikes all over their body, etc) there’s also giant sea serpents that are sort of like traditional Chinese dragons.

7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

Walking, so much fucking walking. If they have a horse that doesn’t die from an ambush (which happens all the time) It sort of helps the journey. Though they get on a giant robot homunculus with a whole city on it at one point so that speeds the journey up for a few weeks.

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

Currently editing the hell out of Act 1, I have a few chapters of Act 2 but it’s not free from my wrath either.

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

In terms of tropes, fallen heroes, found family, chosen one (who’s avoiding it at every turn) fallen civilizations, and magic robots.

Other than that, I hope it’s the characters that draw people in. It’s very character driven even if the worldbuilding and magic is thoroughly detailed. They’re fun as hell to write about and I love mixing and matching their dynamics to see who loves or hates each other.

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

that people like it lol, that’s about it.

I’ll tag @deanwax and whoever else wants to join!

#writing #writeblr #tag game #fantasy #grayguard

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crispy-bonnie · 1 year

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Hi hiiii!!! Request time :)

- Okkk so if u could, can I ask for Dallas, Hoxton, Houston, Sokol, Medic, Dozer and Taser?

- OH also idk if you said u could write for him but if u could maybe like... Jimmy too? I've already requested so many, it's perfectly ok if u can't rn /nm

- If you can't do that many it's chill !!

- So like..the prompt is literally that reader wears rlly cute stuff bc yea

- Like, skirts, knee high socks, Mary Jane shoes, pink blushy makeup and soft strawberry pinks :)

- Here are some examples !!

- So reader just likes presenting rlly fem and cute

- As for personality, I think it'd be cool if reader was also cheerful/optimistic with energy all the time :D

- Reader doesn't actually have to be a female/have she/her pronouns, but I'd rather not have anything that suggests reader is male or anything (genderless is okay tho !!)

Ty for reading this + answering!! Here's a song :)

I LOVE THIS ??? GRAHHH SOFT PASTELS AND CUTE CLOTHING IQHESFUJHWV i've always wanted to present fem like this but then people would thing i'm not a he/they so it's pretty difficult lol also , first time writing with jimmy and houston ! so this is gonne be a bit tough but i can sure as hell do my best !i'm also gonna add the bonus of the reader being small because fuck you /lh no i'm not projecting stfu

i would also like to note that some of these are a bit rushed because oh my god this took WAY too long to complete

You're cute, small, and optimistic - PAYDAY GANG + FBI UNITS

Dallas

If you don't bring this man happiness, then I don't know who does You're just so small and happy like oh my god why are you such a bean- And the things you dress in are just adorable too like wtf

Dallas will go through hell and back to make sure that nobody hurts his precious bean

If you're actually vicious and tough during heists then he'll actually be terrified

Like- no matter how many heists he's been on with you, it always catches him off guard when you pull out a fucking flamethrower and torch anyone who gets in your way [including civilians if you're that careless] while rocking some Mary Janes and a cute pink skirt

If that's not the case and you're actually a lot more frail, then he'll pretty much be a human shield for you so that you don't die He'll be constantly screaming for a medic bag, but not for himself, but rather for you so that he makes sure that there's medical supplies at the ready if you get hurt

While off-duty, he just loves to spend time with you. Playing games, drawing, pretty much anything

You're always so bubbly and happy, even during his bad days you always manage to find a way to cheer him up and make him smile

Hoxton

Again, you're a little bundle of sunshine for Hoxton, but the difference is that he'll actually tease you about it

He'll often call you sweet nicknames, but the ones he calls you by most are 'Sunshine' and 'Sweetheart'

If you're struggling to do something like reach something on a high shelf or lift a heavy object, he'll end up doing it for you with a cheeky remark "Sweetheart, if you need a ladder then just call for me."

If you're extreme on the field, he'll try his best to lay off on the teasing so that he doesn't get a bullet right between the eyes "Hey Sweetcheeks, run a little faster would ya- okay okay I'm sorry please put the Garand away-"

If that's not the case, then he'll be pretty similar to Dallas. He'll do anything to make sure that you get hurt

If you so much as get a tear on one of your knee-highs or one of your accessories gets damaged, he'll murder the one who broke it and make sure to take it to Aldstone for fixing the second you get back from the heist

But on the more sweet side, he'll do his best to spend time with you. He'll drop anything and everything to join you if you're baking though

Either because your treats are really good or he doesn't trust you to not burn the safe house down

Houston

Houston can and will tease you about your height, and sometimes he’ll jokingly question the practicality of your fit during battle

If you’re an aggressive bean, he won’t hesitate to zip his mouth when you threateningly point your Commando-101 directly at him

If not, he’ll just continue with his teasing. In both situations, he’ll eventually tone down on the teasing, especially with your bubbly behavior

The sparkle in your eyes when something catches your attention, your genuine worry when he gets hurt, your enthusiasm to make sure he gets back into the game, gAHH someone please put this man into the freezer because he’s MELTED

Can and will find any excuse to hold you. Whether it be lifting you up to reach something high or carrying you to safety during a heist. Just seeing your small figure adorned in such adorable and bright clothes really makes his day

It’s like a big contrast compared to all the bloodshed and other horrifying things that he’s unfortunately gotten used to. You’re just his little marshmallow

Jimmy

Legit thought he was trippin when he saw you walk in wearing your bright pastel fit. Then again, he’s always trippin

But like- he was so confused. In a good way though? He was shocked to see such a contrast in what would usually a dumb and sober world.

For a minute he thought you were a hallucination from all the coke he’s been snorting, but eventually he finally gets the memo that you are indeed real

Jimmy legit thinks that you’re an angel or something, so that’s what he calls you.

If you’re a more chaotic one during heists, then he’ll refer to you as Guardian Angel and help you slay all the cops

If that’s not the case, he does his damnedest to protect you from harm’s way. If you or even your outfit gets damaged, he immediately goes ham

This applies to the rest of the gang too. If they harm you emotionally or physically then he WILL throw hands

Sokol

“Why are you dressed up like little baby?” Was the first thing he said to you. He was so confused about your attire, and your behavior confused him more

How the fuck can you stay so cheerful while you’re stealing nuclear weapons??

At some point, he starts to appreciate your optimism, as it helps to get through heists and life in general. Hell, he might even join you in the encouragement

He’s still confused about the clothes though, and he’ll keep asking about it too. If you end up taking his words personally, he’ll fucking PANIC and do anything to make you feel better

The second he saw tears his mind went into ‘oh my god the world is ending’ mode and frantically attempted to make you feel better [which he did]

Though still not understanding the whole fashion thing, he does his best not to ask about it any further

Taser

LITERALLY STIMMING WHEN HE SEES YOU LIKE HELP THIS MAN PLEAS E

Istg Taser is like a fucking 4 year old so when he seed you wearing those adorable strawberry themed clothes and shoes he just can’t help but bombard you with compliments

If you’re chaotic in battle, this man will get so distracted watching you fight that he’ll end up tasing himself two times before realizing what the hell is going on

Please let this man play dress up with you oml

He’ll put you in all sorts of pastel outfits, a lot of them with lightning bolt themes, and this mf will just swoon when he sees you in it. He’ll die [/pos] if you wear it more often

Treats you like a princess and will literally do anything. He’ll even go the extra mile by calling you ‘Your Majesty’

Cloaker ended up taking a notice to this and started teasing you

Let’s just say that it didn’t end well for the drop-kicking unit

Dozer

Dozer finds your fashion and demeanor so adorable like omfg

He saw you and went "MUST PROTECT AT ALL COSTS"

If you're a monster on the field, he'll fall for you even more because oh my god SLAY GURL SLAY

You two are so optimistic like- you've got matching energy. He screams at his teammates to not die, you scream at them to not die, it's perfect!

Regardless of your strength in battle, he'll still become a meat shield for you due to your small frame

If ANYONE ruins your fit he will find them and personally beat them down, even if it's a civilian [in which Captain Winters screams at him for it lol]

You were the one who painted the kawaii face on that Dozer mask. No, this is not optional. You were the one who did it.

Dozer will actually encourage you to paint his helmet or add cute little accessories to that and his armor so that you two can slay together!

Medic

You are the one thing that keeps this man from going insane and torching down the entire police force

When he's having a hard day, all he has to do is look at you and whoops the pain is gone

Literally a painkiller

Weak or strong, he'll make sure to be behind you for most of the battle. Sure there's other units in need of healing but you're top priority

He'll go Cloaker feral if anyone [especially the Payday gang] hurts you or even does so much as get their filthy hands on your awesome fit

He'll be the one to wash and/or repair your outfits because oh my god your clothes look expensive, but not in a fancy way. More of a "I spent 100 bucks on Shein to get all of this shit"

Medic also likes to make outfits for you himself. He'll either sew or buy them and encourage you to try them on

#payday #payday 2 #payday 2 x reader #payday x reader #x reader #reader insert #headcanons #request #fanfiction #fanfic #oh my god this literally took forever #crispy writes

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togalnu · 7 months

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Do you have any specific hcs for fem togainu or just fem nitrochi as a whole? I'd love to hear them! ^^

Oops I meant to answer this earlier. Anyways yes! I will be putting this under a read more because. Lol. Enjoy!

You wanna know a secret? Earlier this year I was researching parodies and the legalities of them because I had the grand idea to make a togainu remake but yuri and with some story changes. A whole ass visual novel. I was seriously planning on making it. Suffice to say I have put in some thought in turning these yaoi boys into yuri girls.

We will be here all day if I list every little thought and headcanon I have! I'll def make more posts about my visions in the future, but for right now I need to talk about Shiki. I NEED TO TALK ABOUT SHIKI.

First and foremost, my overall thoughts about Shiki: wasted potential. His route was a huge disappointment when I finally got to it. It was fumbled so fucking badly and it pains my soul because Shiki is hot and I love the concept of his character but.. man. What a let down. I ended up thinking about him a lot because of this. What I would do if I were in charge of writing his route, parts of his characterization that I'd rid of or ameliorate, and maybe even giving him some new quirks to not make him so one-dimensional-evil-villain type. And then along with this, I started thinking about what if he was a woman. because I am attractdd to women. Typical thought process.

First, his design. I am a sucker for black haired red eyes bitches. I love black and red. I'm dying my hair black and red at the end of the year. The majority of my wardrobe is black and red. I do not play around #EMO. I love the almost leather gothic look he has but unfortunately it is not enough for me. I felt that he needed more unnecessary accessories and belts and other clothing items, as any goth should have. I've had a few ideas in mind for Shiki girl outfit and they all lean into these more, like giving her extra bracelets, belts, necklaces, crosses, whatever. I want her DECKED OUT!!! But I also struggle coming up with outfits so I can't really decide what looks good LMAO

Things I love about Shiki's outfit:

- The gloves. UGHHH gloves are so fun. The longer the gloves are the better.

- His stupid coat

- The spikes and crosses. The silver adds a lot to his appearance

- Turtleneck<3

Things I don't like about Shiki's outfit:

- those stupid ass notches on his pants. I can't tell if he has insane thigh-high boots or strange pants, and neither can a lot of artists it seems like? Though it seems pants are the consensus. SAD!

- Turtleneck should have long sleeves

- Or his coat should have long sleeves. One of those two

- What the hell is going on with his belt. It'd look fine if it didn't have those strange hanging.. circle... things

NOW MY IDEAS

I like the idea of her having a corset and fishnets, so I've been including that in whatever iteration of her design I'm working on. I gotta keep the coat too as it's like, a Shiki classic. I've also been trying to decide how a skirt for her might look (I love the idea of it having a slit so you can see her fishnets and thigh high boots).

But I'm torn on including the turtleneck as much as I love it.... I feel like it kinda clashes. Idk maybe i should just move her skirt up so it's not hanging off her ass but also it's fun to draw it that way.

Although adding another belt with the skirt could work too, and have the fishnets peaking out from the skirt slit... not gonna draw that rn though im just brainstorming here

Like I said earlier I'd love to give her way more accessories than base Shiki has but I need to definitely play around with outfit ideas more bc I don't want her to look too cluttered either. Also sorry all the pics are torso only because for some reason I struggle HARD with drawing calves and feet

I don't have much to say for hair ideas.. I just like the idea of it flairing out + two long.. idk what to call them... strands of hair? Down her cheeks?? Okay well u see what I mean in the pic. Bangs pretty much stay the same

And ohhh my god I know togainu is set in the post-apocalyptic future, but considering it came out in 2005 I feel obligated to rework some of the designs to be a little more y2k.. Akira with low waisted flared jeans... making Shiki even more gothic... it's so fucking fun HOW CAN I NOT!!

Also the other day I saw this one corset that I LOVED and wanted to see if I can Shiki-fy it but hmm... idk... I definitely need to play around with the idea more but here's a quick sketch i did just for funsies so you get the idea

Okay moving on

Second, his characterization. I love the idea of what they were going for in terms of his relation to Nano. I wish so badly they had expanded on this past Shiki just hating line users and killing them because he's unable to kill Nano (although I do think this is a pretty good bit of characterization). I'm pretty sure the Chayamachi manga goes more into this but idc we are talking about the game so I'm gonna pretend it doesn't exist.

Shiki is smug and cocky. Incredibly so. But a big part of his character is how hateful he is, so much so that it's this hate that motivates everything he does.

I love it. I love his hatred. I wish the game went more into it sooo badly and like if he found out Akira had anti-line blood before the end of the game and there was time given to show his reaction? Would he hate Akira for it??? Would he feel any kind of resentment?? If I was Shiki I'd definitely feel complicated as fuck over it!!!

Anyways I'm still working out how fem Shiki could be improved upon in terms of this, and I LOVEEE LOVE LOVE LOVE writing personality and backstories and relationships with other characters and how they all interact with each other. I have very deep oc lore because of this but i will not get into my ocs rn because they have nothing to do with togainu.

This post is already long enough however and if I were to talk about all the ideas I had for Shiki characterization upgrade... well it'd take even longer. To say the least. One day I'll talk about it though! In a more comprehensive post including other characters and whatnot. It's something I definitely also need to work out in my head more tho

It's been a pretty fun project so far that I hope to do more with in the future. Side note that doesn't really matter but there's this song that I always imagine fem Shiki amvs too oops.. RIDE IT by LustSickPuppy... this part especially.......

(the part is around 1:17 if you don't feel like listening to the entire thing. But u should)

Urggghhhh I love lsp ugh ughhhhhfuhrhhcuuhfhuufghh sorry for posting lyrics and a spotify link. It will happen again

OKAY. AMYWAYS

I do not give a fuck if all of this seems too self indulgent. If anything it's supposed to be!!! It's a labor of love!!!

Thank u to anyone who read this far. I appateciate it

#asks #im crazy #tnc #shiki

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fluffytriceratops · 2 years

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Random facts about Nefertiri. <3

Again, drew her older for the hell of it. I love Nefertiri so much, she’s such a wee Angel. Raphie is very proud of his little book worm and Kristina enjoys having a mini version of her lol. 😊👌

I drew this one around the same time as the Monet one, I just haven’t posted it yet lmao. I’m having a bit of art block rn, so I haven’t been drawing anything TMNT related lately. I really want to, but any time that I go to draw something involving TMNT my brain basically short circuits and I can never figure out what to draw lol. Hopefully this’ll pass soon. ^v^

Tags: @thelaundrybitch @rheawritesforfun @digitl-art-monstr @turtle-babe83 @mysticboombox @leosgirl82 @drowninghell @lec743 @raphslovemuffin80 @post-apocalyptic-daydream @squirrelfurs @bibiz82

(If you would like to be tagged in my future TMNT (+tmnt oc) related work, feel free to let me know and I'll happily add you!)

Have a lovely day/night! I'm sending the very many virtual huggles to you!! Remember to take care of yourselves!!! <33

—

- She was named after a character from The Mummy Returns, one of Kristina’s favourite movies. In the movie, Nefertiri is the pharaohs daughter, the princess of Egypt and the guardian of “the bracelet of Anubis”. Kristina had been obsessed with the films since a young age, and because of her own Egyptian background, wanted to name her daughter something involving it. Plus, Evie/Rachel Weisz is 👌💕

- Loves spicy, sour and bitter foods. The complete opposite of her sister. And when I say spicy, I mean spicy. It’s her shit. And she barley breaks a sweat.

- Due to a complication, Nefertiri doesn’t have a shell or a plastron. She has what appears to be parts of a shell that never fully grew on her back, but besides that she’s completely bare. Like that of a human. Except with green scale covered skin, of course. Among other mutant features.

- Most people call her Nefertiri, but she also goes by a nickname, Tiri. It’s her most common alias besides her actual name.

- Her snout is always buried in a book. She lives and breathes to read, write, and learn new things.

- Tries to pull jokes like her sister Monet, but she’s terrible at it. And her form of a good joke are dad jokes, they’re her go to. Monet hates it, but she finds them very amusing.

- Like her ma, she has a photographic memory. Her family/friends like to tease her about being an encyclopedia/dictionary because she knows and remembers so much stuff.

- Because of her Auntie Iris (@digitl-art-monstr 's OC) Tiri found a passion for art/painting and does so in her spare time quite often. And because she's been doing it since she was a kid, she's actually quite talented at it. It becomes a passion of hers, and eventually a way for her to express her feelings and vent. Plus she gets to hang out with Iris more, which is great.

- Nefertiri went through a series of complications when she was born. This created a lot of health issues that she constantly struggles with. Her family wasn't even sure she was going to make it, in fact, there were a few occasions where she almost didn't. After Kristina's C-section Nefertiri and Monet were both placed into incubators where they would remain the rest of their term till they were ready to be born and brought into the world. Monet seemed to be doing fine, more than fine even. But Nefertiri almost immediatly started going down hill. Donatello hardly left the lab, and neither did Raphael and Kristina. Monet was able to come out of her incubator as soon as her term was up, but Nefertiri was forced to stay in hers for a few more months. She had been growing much more slowly than her twin sister. And was much more fragile because of it.

- The first few years of Tiri's life were the hardest. Everyone was afraid that even the smallest fall would be very damaging and possibly even fatal. Her immune system was basically non-existent, and therefore it was much easier for her to get sick as well. Everyone treated her as if she was made of glass. Or the finest of crysal. Bumps and bruises were taken much more serisouly, and she wasn't allowed near anyone when they had even the most basics of colds/illnesses. Nefertiri was basically forced to sit on the sidelines wrapped in bubblewrap watching as Monet and her cousins lived a relatively normal childhood. Raphael was scared to be too close to her, worried he'd accidentally hurt her. It took a lot of courage from his family before he was even convinced he could hold his daughter. For the first few years of Tiri's life, she didn't know much besides the main rooms of the lair (she wasn't allowed in certain rooms) and Donnie's lab where she got daily check ups.

- But the older she got, the stronger she got as well. She's still extremely fragile in comparason to her siblings (yes, there's more than just Monet and Tiri hehe) but she learns to hold her own quite well. Or at least, well enough.

- Tiri grew to be quite envious of her family/friends due to these reasons. She spent a lot of time alone because she wasn't allowed to play with the other's at first. And the only ones who she really spent time with, were the adults. When Monet got to start training, Nefertiri still wasn't strong enough phyiscally to do so. Tiri was very upset about this, and even Monet grew insistent that her sister join in, but the adults believed it was too risky for Nefertiri to start training yet. Colds could even become fatal for her if they weren't careful. So not only did Tiri start later in life, but she also started training later as well. At least, so the adults believe... Late at night, when everyone was asleep, Monet would sneak out of bed and take Tiri with her. Than she would teach her everything she learned the day before. This became a nightly routine of there's. A secret which was later revealed.

- Despite lacking in certain areas physically, Nefertiri was quite advanced intellectly. Especially with being around Kristina and Donnie 24/7. She has a love for knowledge, just like her mother. And prides herself on being extremely intelligent.

- Because she has no shell, Donnie created one for her. Just like how he created his Battle Shell to protect his own soft shell. (I have yet to design this, so I don't know much about it rn-)

- Nefertiri's weapon of choice is the kusarigama.

- Tiri tends to be quite rational and calm, and is usually seen as the voice of reason, especially when it comes to her sister, Monet. However, she can lose her cool under stress.

- "There's a place for everything, and everything has a place."

- Nefertiri has a confident and responsible, if somewhat controlling, personality. She tends to worry if things get out of control. She is very organized. She developed a need to be a perfectionist. She enjoys being the most organized of the family and can’t help but encourage others to do the same. As well as being a driven individual, Tiri dedicated her free time to training as well as studying.

- She does seem to be more empathic than her sister, Monet when it comes to understanding other people’s feelings and daily problems. She tends to express many concerns for her friends and would even go out of her way to try and do the impossible for them.

- Although Nefertir is often the most conscientious and considerate of her siblings, at times she can be pedantic and controlling, once even suggesting that she considers chewing a prescribed number of times before swallowing as a normal practice. Being the responsible one, she constantly reminds her siblings and her friends to do their work and is often paranoid when things aren’t organized. This tends to drive those around her insane at times when she stressed about it too often.

- Often times, she doesn’t listen to what other people say and assumes the situation for the worse. When push comes to shove, she would often show-off and proves to others that she can be more or just as skilled as they are in certain events.

- Tiri often would disagree and argue with Monet, who is her polar opposite. While in contrast to Monet’s rebellious and care-free personality, Nefertiri is controlling and organized and because of their opposite personalities and different ideals, Tiri and Mo often argue and have various conflicts, leaving friend's/cousins/family members stuck in the middle of their fight. Also, another trait for Nefertiri is bossy. While arguing with Monet, she bosses her around but no knowing that it sometimes hurts her feelings.

- At the end of the day, however, Mo and Tiri are extremely close and love and value each other deeply. They look up to each other a lot, and are there for each other no matter what, even if they are fighting.

- Also, stress painting because yes-

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joyful-soul-collector · 1 year

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Lovecraft Country Episode 1

My dad told me I'd love this show and I got nothin else better to do rn so let's fakkin GO

Oh wow there's a lot happening

Jackie Robinson just cut Cthulu in half with a baseball bat

OH ITS A DREAM okay that makes much more sense

Looks like this is the 40s or 50s? Idk my years very well, but segregation is a thing for sure (future Marko here, it's the 50s)

Aw man they gotta walk? That sucks

"Stories are like people. Loving them doesn't make them perfect. You just try and cherish them, overlook their flaws" GODDAMN I love that. I don't agree with overlooking their flaws (both in stories and people), but I understand the meaning and I love it so much

Father's gone missing womp womp

Hippolyta, that's a cool name, imma steal it

I gotta say Atticus is a very pretty man. I didn't see it as much when Johnathan Majors played Kang in Loki (mainly because he wasn't there for long I think), but he is v pretty

Oooh secret legacy?? Mysterious letters??? V interesting...

Oop dude literally in the middle of a BJ and just talks to Atticus like he wasn't A Bit Busy just then

Ooh those two sing well!

Fuck yeah bust open that hydrant

Oof I guess Leti isn't as close to her sister as I thought

Oh damn she drew a grim reaper right over where they need to go lol

Damn Atticus is probably so smart with all those books, if people weren't so damn racist maybe he wouldn't have had to join the army to move out, he could've been a writer or somethin

Oop there's a hole in the wall. Bet that's a fun memory...

Bruh who tf did he call in South Korea???

Oh gross, the monkey noises.... hate seeing how people act towards them

Bruh this red car is fuckin banger look at the wood?? If old cars like that weren't so unsafe I would love to drive one

Oh jeez I hope this diner isn't too awful an experience...

Oh my god what in the fuck is happening

LETITIA FUCKIN LEWIS

WAIT THAT'S THE CAR THEY SAID HIS DAD WAS DRIVING THE FANCY SILVER CAR

WAIT WHAT THE HELL DID THE TRUCK HIT??

WHO'S THIS RANDOM WHITE LADY

Okay so the diner was definitely a terrible experience. Love how smart Atticus is tho, he figured that shit out quick

This little girl is so creative I love her drawings

Sounds like Leti's mom wasn't the best to her, but her family never saw that so they're mad she didn't go to the funeral

Oof that's a rough fight to have, the one between Atticus and his dad. I understand why his father would be upset at Atticus for joining the army, but I also understand Atticus too. He views his country the way he does stories. "You just try and cherish them, overlook their flaws"

Dad and George's parents were shit, so then his Dad was shit, and George feels like he didn't protect his brother or Atticus enough. Oh the cycle of abuse ever turns...

Devon countyyyyy that's the one with the grim reaper on it

Aw fuck is that a cop

Nooooo fuck fuck fuck

FUCK ITS THAT SHERRIF THAT'S MURDERS PEOPLE

SUNDOWN TOWN FUCKIN FUCK

Oh you motherFUCKER

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK

Oh mgod that was fucking terrifying

GODDAMNIT NO FUCK

HOLY SHIT WTF IS THAT

GO LETI YOU CAN DO IT

Fuuuuuck this guy is turning into a monster....

The flaaaaares v nice

Bruh why you guys walking did she total the car??

THERE IT IS THERE'S THE SILVER CAR

UHHH?? "WELCOME HOME"???

Ok so that was uhhh fucking amazing? The mystery, the monsters, the awesome characters, the struggles with racism juxtaposed with the science-fiction struggles, FUCK this is set up so damn well?? Goddamn okay I'm gonna proofread and post this and then imma watch the next one cuz I can't fuckin WAIT

#lovecraft country #letitia lewis #atticus freeman #george freeman #marko reacts

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grokebaby · 2 years

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Vision vs finished product

Hell's high judgements

(this is just me rambling about my initial ideas and process for their character designs)

Tw for a(n image of a) sort of veiny eyeball creature (okhula from fran bow)

Delilah - I think pretty early on, like almost from the start I decided to have her be Deirdre's sister so i already had some footing and reference to go off of for her design. Tho it's possible that at some point in the hazy beginning I hadn't thought of that yet but nonetheless my image of her was some kind of large horned demon. I may have pictured the character as more masculine, or at least not a woman initially but I think that changed really quickly bc like I said she became Deirdre's sister pretty much upon conception. Her initial idea wasn't very different from what we ended up with, my first vision was just a vague, tall, intimidating looking demon who had like their head mysteriously in the shadow and the only way you could tell where the face is was thanks to her glowing horns. Her first vision was more of an aesthetic and a vibe bc being one of twins, she was very easy to design from then on. I also pretty much immediately knew I wanted her to be heavily scarred, particularly on the face, but it took me a bit to figure out how, specifically. I think at first I thought of her missing even more eyes than she is now. Her designing had a clumsy first few steps but it wasn't difficult to settle on. What ended up being difficult was redrawing her at all lmao, I still feel like i do her disservice every other time I draw her ;-; Idk why she's so hard for me to make look decent bc she's not intended to look off-putting or anything like some of my designs intentionally are. Aside from struggling to learn to draw her, it was pretty straightforward. I would say I'm pleased w the final product if I was confident in how I draw her but as of rn I feel like the problem is more me than the design lol :')

Hart - My idea was an indistinguishable mass of eldritchean tentacles, sprinkle in some eyes and whatever extra freaky stuff and yeah. The final product ended up having alot more distinguishing features bc originally I had them be like, an actual black blob. Void with eyes. Like those black cats you only see when they open their eyes. My idea did develop a little from there and I thought of adding onto the "What is this" factor by having them sort of resemble having a legit body structure but twisted and twirled into such knots that it'd be impossible to tell where everything was actually meant to be. Like just, the most tangled uncanny mess. It had this kind of theme, an idea of being folded into itself and having multiple parts that could open and be straightened out and it'd be like this interesting thing w Hart looking a bit different when they're actually completely unfolded. Sort of like how hedgehogs are just spike balls when in defense mode, but w a Lovecraftian horror who is maddeningly dizzying to interpret. Just a weird, uncanny, what am I looking at creature, of resembling body parts that actually aren't those body parts but just placed and knotted to look like them. I'm not sure if I achieved that vibe, tbh the final product looks more like just a generic Tentacle monster with a flavor of Toothless from how to train your dragon but hey. It looks charming and expressive and I'm fine w that :]

Xerxes - He's probably the most visually different from the first idea. I actually actively challenged myself w him, particularly to diverge from the very first idea somehow and do something a little different. Only thing that stayed constant, and the thing I knew I wanted for him from the start, was One Eye. And look at that, he still only has one eye. Technically. My very first visual was this sort of weird.. This. I wasn't sure how else to describe it

Like, that, but just very muscular lol. This sort of. Muscle eyeball demon. Kinda grotesque looking now that I think about it but it felt fitting for a hell demon or Wrath. Just a massive eye. My idea evolved slightly into like an orc or a cyclops after that but this is where I diverged to challenge myself and I thought maybe it could be some beastly looking animal, closer to a minotaur or some animal warrior you'd find in an mmorpg, stuff like that. Initially I had Xerxes be quadrupedal tho, like a feral animal, but still be sentient and demonic somehow. I wanted him to look really fierce and I designed armor and really heavy chains around his neck. I did really like the chains aesthetic but I decided instantly that I WILL NOT be drawing chains that often no sir! When I made him more centaur in body structure I still kept him like, a cyclops for a little while until I decided he could just have battle scars and just lost the other eye. I actually had him resemble a boar at first, I'm not sure when he shifted to being a bull. I could be remembering this part wrong too but I just remember trying to practice drawing a very fierce looking (herbivore) animal. I specifically wanted him to not be a predator animal ykno. I felt like a lion or something would've been too generic or predictable and I wanted some practice, and hey, I've since become pretty attached to bulls specifically. Apparently. Which is neat I think, not sure why I'm so fond of them but I sure am now. Thanks Xerxes. From then on he's mostly evolved to just look more, uh, Idk, better represented as the animal he is? I just know I was poor at drawing bovines and similar animals way back then but have since gotten notably better so I think Xerxes looks amazing these days. I didn't struggle learning to draw him nearly as much as Delilah, he was actually fairly easy bc I proceeded to draw him a fair amount once I really learned him. But like I said I've gotten practice and improved in things like drawing buff people since then so, the final product is great, even though I draw his armor way, way less lol. I'm not that great w armor and besides, I don't draw him in battle all that often..

#my thoughts #my ocs #Character notes #Character design #Delilah #Xerxes #Hart #Design process #Demon oc #I've thought of doing rambles like these for a while now #I may do more on other characters

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pathos-p · 1 year

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"Weirdly Specific Artist Ask Game" but i got tagged in it so i am gonna answer all of them 'cause theyre fun

questions by @/i-like-eyes

thanks for the tag @king-chook!! ^^

1. Art programs you have but don't use

i thiiink i have a license for clip studio paint that came with my old wacom tablet but i never rly used it. also used to have krita installed for the longest time but just always felt off to me idk why. don't currently have it installed anymore tho

2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left or right (or forward even)

to their right is a bit easier i think. not smth i consciously notice, mostly i'm just thinking abt when im doodling on the margins of stuff they usually are looking to the left of the page

3. What ideas come from when you were little

uhhh idk tbh, i dont think much of my art draws from that

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw

cityscapes !!! i love cities they r so pretty and cool looking but goddamn theyre so hard to draw

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself

80-20? i post everything that i finish. basically the only stuff that doesnt get posted is sketches i give up on

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn't supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)

hmmmm not that i can think of rn...

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate

watercolour !! i've tried it a few times and Struggled but i love seeing ppl's work in it

8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in

so many animatics ..................... also many comic ideas ..................... i get so many ideas that i just never start on or start and only do a little before losing the hyperfocus/fixation and just Cannot continue them. it sucks

9. What are your file name conventions

usually the character name, maybe a bit of description of what theyre doing... idk not much of a convention to it

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw

hmm i like jackets :)

11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what

yes, usually music. sometimes random youtube videos like stream highlights or video essays.

12. Easiest part of body to draw

uhhh hair? maybe idk. hard question bc it varied a lot depending on what kinda style and just. sometimes smth is hard in a particular drawing then easy later idk

13. A creator who you admire but whose work isn't your thing

i cant think of anything i will edit it in if i think of anyone

14. Any favorite motifs

in my drawings i dont feel like i use any much. mostly i pull motifs from whatever im doing fanart of lol. in music, i like religious motifs (but not like. ones abt christ or bible stories, rather heaven, hell, god/divinity, angels)

15. *Where* do you draw (don't drop your ip address this just means do you doodle at a park or smth)

at home pretty much exclusively. in bed lol

16. Something you are good at but don't really have fun doing

idk i feel like the stuff im better at is the stuff i like bc i practice it more for fun lol

17. Do you eat/drink when drawing? if so, what

not usually

18. An estimate of how much art supplies you've broken

surprisingly little. mostly bc i do more digital art lol

19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.)

weapons and nature. especially ice for nature

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy

i cant think of anything ill add it if i do

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways

i love rougher styles, like ones with a lot of visible brushstrokes and bold lines and shit. so cool. idk how to make it look good lol i dont have the confidence in my lines for it

22. What physical exercises do you do before drawing, if any

none... probably i should change that

23. Do you use different layer modes

yeah, often i use a multiple layer for shading then a variety to colour adjust at the end

24. Do your references include stock images

sometimes

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

cant think of any

26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended

there was this poem i wrote about capitalism and how shit it is and someone thought it was abt interpersonal relationships/smth along the lines of a breakup. i rly didnt mind it tho i thought it was cool bc the emotion was not far off, the sense of betrayal and abandonment. just a very very different subject

27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff? If so, what is it you draw to warm up with

no lol

28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines)

i ran a zine (digital only) for the dimension 20 zine jam! and also made art+writing for others in that :D also was part of a polygon yt fanzine a while back

29. Media you love, but doesn't inspire you artistically

spider-man (not the MCU, mostly tasm and a few of the comics)

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated

IS IT BAD TO SAY A PIECE THAT GOT QUITE A BIT OF POSITIVE ATTENTION ?? maybe

i rly like the cj comic i did i am genuinely so goddamn happy with the result so . even tho it did very well by the standards for the fandom its for and my current follower base it is underrated

alternatively this one https://www.tumblr.com/pathos-p/704380503765221377/tridential-sovereignty?source=share bc it didnt get all that much attention on any social media site but i think its cool !!

(mostly only using recent ones bc i dont wanna dig back further esp onto my old twt acct, too much work lol)

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vamprnce · 2 years

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Chris lore/tidbits I can think off of the top of my head rn, bc he's my one and truly baby 💜

I don't have an exact date I created him (or beta version of him lol) but it was sometime in 2015 iirc! I haven't started to really post/draw him (especially here) since 2018

Before he was Chris/Christian he was just, a random dude lol w no backstory or anything really, other than "slutty punk"

I first made him in sr4 and I honestly lost that original file (the first version of him and newer/current version too) bc my 360 just doesn't wanna play sr4 for some reason no matter how much I try lol

I think I developed him around 2016/17 and I gave him the name Christian. I actually have reasons for the name bc I actually loved that name for a guy so much plus it's a funny irony to him bc he's agnostic. An agnostic Christian.

His birthday (not the creation date) is sr1's release/anniversary date! August 29th (1982) the reason for this is bc it was a place holder, but I got lazy to change it after but I think it's really nice :-)

He's originally from the Row and grew up there, he literally knows the area so well as he loved to get out of the house and just walk around, he'd usually come home around midnight or he'd stay w his at the time boyfriend Lee (when they were teens)

Chris never met Saints members previously in the Row (he could possibly cross paths, but he was pretty much to himself back then)

Before the Saint he was just in a small gang w his friends, gang didn't last long as one friend died, one left for the Canales and another left to go to Chicago

Chris was originally gonna go w that friend to Chicago too, but he decided to stay in Stilwater in the end. A few years later he gets pulled into the Saints (plus he's technically a run away before all this)

I think by the time he's in the Saints he's 24 actually w the correct math lmao but I originally had him like 19/20 before

Chris is always loyal to the depths of hell for the Saints, and he's always true to his word that he'd die for them or take a bullet for a Saint (which has happened lol) he was even extremely loyal to Julius once upon a time

Chris had a one sided love/crush of Lin during the Rollerz arc 🥴 ofc he never admitted his feelings (he rarely was much for convos) so Lin's death hurt a lot, especially since he really loved her as a friend and a Saint.

Carlos and Aisha's death hit hard too. Leaving him w loads of survivors guilt from most of these deaths and just guilt in general bc he's the boss, he's the leader.

Back to Carlos tho, they were close, as a big bro lil bro type deal, so he was a bit more protective and had this extra responsibility for him. So when Carlos gets killed bc of his actions that really hit him the hardest, the point where he felt numb but w raw anger and revenge after. Bringing up Lin and Carlos is very dangerous to do and Saints learned not to bring up their names in front of him.

Aisha was close to him as well, she, Johnny and him were the Rows trio of best friends back in the day. Aisha was also so sweet to him while he struggled to adjust back to 2011 Stilwater,he stayed at their place for a short while (before getting the gang up and running again) just to readjust and get settled/back on track w shit. He still has a neckless she gave him for his birthday/him returning again, it's locked away w his special items/treasures.

Alright besides death, he has one and only car since sr1 which is his bootlegger. Black paint w the white stripe down the middle, all purple inside. His true baby, even if he's not a car person lol hotwired a random car he saw parked in the Row and it's been his ever since

He loves cooking and an absolutely great cook! If he wasn't in gangs he'd probably opened a restaurant or something lmao sometimes he cooks for Johnny and him but most times he's lazy to cook so he orders in lol

The places Chris says at the most at is Purgatory, the penthouse in sr2 and penthouse in sr3

He has 4 dogs and 2 cats lmao but honestly the dogs are his, the cats are mainly Johnny's. Dogs: Queenie (bull terrier), Prince (pit bull), Goober (German shepherd) and Gumby (greyhound); Cats: Machete (black/white) and Stanley the meatball (Siamese)

Chris and Johnny get married post sr3 in this timeline/universe! :)

Chris also has two (adopted) daughters also a younger brother. He also has both parents in his life, relationships were rough over the years but he tries his best to connect w them, especially his mom (he loves both of them)

#text #long ass semi lore post lol #christian alvarez #otp: disaster bisexuals #kinda lol #here for anyone whos interested in my bosses sjfjdnsnsh #god i swear theres so much more lore and info but this is already so long! lol maybe ill come back for other stuff or ill answer things

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eirian · 2 years

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im going insane so im going to tell you about it and by that i mean make a post to scream into the void about my troubles

this will be a rambly, stream of consciousness post so watch out. unmedicated adhd brain shenanigans are afoot

i feel like i need to draw for myself more. i try to very often, i do, but i still feel like im caught in the whole “if i dont draw for attention then whats the point” hellhole that ive been trying to get out of for years. but i feel like the reason for this is that i literally Need the attention to up my chances for commissioners??? because thats how i make a living rn??? like i literally rely on commissions as my main source of income and that pays for shit like rent and medication and appointments and food :( i barely buy shit for myself anymore b/c im putting it all towards needs and not wants

also im worried my merch wont pop off as well as it did when i first released the submas merch. i know those were in high demand, but im afraid the demand will go to single digit sales for them as well as everything else i sell. im honestly thinking about just buying very small stock, maybe 10 of each item at most, and opening the orders that way (after i ship things out of course). speaking of shipping my last shipment STILL hasnt come in and im a little frustrated b/c im like. bruh i need to ship out these preorders. im not gonna do preorders in the future i dont think, im waiting way too long for this stock to come in :( i dont want yall to wait forever for like..a keychain

ive been trying to work here and there on both villain + school and facets (facets is completely written and scripted, v+s just recently got solidified as an outline Finally) but i kinda only had energy to do so for One Day so im not sure when those’ll be out lmfao. sorry bout that

i want to make more ocs, i havent made new ocs in a hot minute and im like :( wah. my character design brain is kaput right now. i wanna make more cool db ocs and such like i used to. it used to bring me so much joy. or maybe even inazuma eleven ocs idk im just wanting New Boys

i have so much to do or at least so much i could be doing. like i could make new merch art but that feels pointless if i dont have the money to buy the merch. i still need to ship out my FIRST orders, christ. and im trying so hard to get commissions rolling so i CAN ship out my shit but :( its a struggle. im struggling. god im stressed to hell and back hi

sometimes i do be like i wanna die ! but i wont. i’ll be ok things will be ok. i will get commissions its only the 6th. i have time. and im going to check out some cons that i can maybe table at in the future. thatd be wonderful. fuck i need to reprint my business cards with my updated twitter im a little mad i ended up getting my account unsuspended right after i made those cards. at least i only made 50 of them i guess

i need like an online journal or something to write this shit into instead of like, a public tumblr post LMFAO. but i cant use washi tape online so there goes that /hj

i really really need to figure out a way to let the general furry population know that i will draw their stuff for commissions. like. i Will. i Have. i Can. just give me a chance bro i’ll draw your inflation fetish art just give me a chance to make some money to live LOL. i would draw more furry art but i am so unmotivated and sluggish its so hard..

i kinda feel like i should try to get back into adoptables too but ive been so depressed and down and unmotivated its really really hard for me to design things for myself let alone to sell. so im like ok now what i have no income. im too brain fucky to get a “real job” so im just like. sits here on my ass doing absolutely nothing except being sad. ok so i might have depression

anyway life is hard thanks for putting up with me

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junkyardromeo · 5 months

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Hi! It's your Secret Santa again 🎅.

How are you? I'm glad there's only 2 days left of my workweek. Adulting sucks sometimes lol.

Ooh, finals week. I remember those, definitely a hectic time. I'm sorry to hear about history. I struggled alot in biology. Made like ds and fs on all the tests. Then miraculously made an a on the final. Kinda saved my grade. Maybe you'll get lucky in history too 🤞.

I love guitar music. Alot of people in my family play guitar, so I grew up listening to alot of great guitar playing. I think you sounded really good in the videos, and I bet you sound just as good when you're sober too.

Thats awesome you've been in a band and play solo too! What kind of places do you play at? Do you ever get nervous about it?

Yeah, college definitely isn't for everyone. Do you know what you might want to do if you decide not to go the college route?

I read some of your poetry! One of my favorites was this one... it didn't have a title so I just copied the beginning of it: "somewhere in south carolina there is a dying boy sitting". What inspires you most when writing poetry?

I would love to see your photography! Is it posted on your blog as well?

I see you have alot of Dukes of Hazard pics on your blog. Is that one of your favorite shows? I'll admit, I've never seen it before, and don't really know much about it. So I'm curious, what are some of your favorite things about that show and what draws you to it?

I hope you have an amazing night tonight and a wonderful day tomorrow!

Until next time!

i'm doing pretty good, just turned in a final paper for philosophy. a little hungover lmao, me n the boys got a little crazy last night. crossed while watching fight club is INSANE.

as far as where i play: parties, bars, church, funerals, you name it, i've probably played it. any old place will do.

im gonna be so real i've always said that if life don't work out i'll be a trucker. already know how to drive a rig pretty good—i been driving bigass trailers n hauling shit around the hunt club since i was old enough to drive. n by old enough to drive, i mean old enough to reach the pedals.

i'm so glad u like my poems! really im mostly just inspired by the world around me n my own experiences. also, i'd forgot about the one you mentioned n goddamn that hit different rn.

some of my photography is on here, yeah. tag is my photos.

lmaooo yeah i been on the dukes BAD lately. watched it growing up bc they played reruns on tvland and my parents liked it. i don't remember why i started watching it again but im glad i did bc its rly fun n takes my mind off all the big pressing shit i have going on. bottom line abt me n that is: im from the south, i like cars, n i don't like the cops. the whole thing is just fighting the system (any system) n driving like hell. whats not to love fr

you have a good day too!

#srs23

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everlastingspiral · 2 years

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hi hi, in your ask ‘cause of a tagged post and wanted to say i disagree about people going on “crusades” when it seems like (unless i missed a post??) people want others to draw/write what they want for the listeners (i do agree the whole ’not *the* listeners, *your* listeners’ thing is silly tho like lol the latter part is implied automatically) but just tag/note so they can decide to engage or not. but anyway, i scrolled your tumblr and found a few things i agreed with (xavier being introduced just to die, the consequences of inversion where 1500 people died not quite being at the level that would be expected of an event like that for major characters, the feeling that all antagonists need to be like 100% bad). it’s the first time (other than a youtube comment here and there) i’ve seen someone be critical even a little of redacted’s work and i’m fascinated lol! i don’t agree with everything on your tumblr lol but but i’m wondering what you would you change about a couple of plots or characters that bother you rn (for me i would chill on the ‘every time alexis is mentioned it’s something immensely negative’ like she can’t be 1000% all bad can she?? there has to be a reason she’s still a major part of the clan and inversion would have taken out a character we actually know maybe or had xavier actually be a major or major supporting character for awhile first; not a writer tho so idk).

I use the term “crusades” from the history of this fandom to get riled up over something very inconsequential, but now that I check again, in my exhausted stupor I mistaked posts from one person for multiple people. I’ll apologize for that at least.

I’m surprised I’ve been having more people on here that don’t act like I want Redacted burned at the stake. I get mad at him sure, but really, it’s not that big of a deal. To be frank most of the things on my “sin list” aren’t things I’m that mad about, it’s more the culmination of them altogether. I’m just venting. Thanks for being so open to conversation. I expected more anon hate when I started posting here, but I digress.

Alright. Anon. You have done it. You have unleashed the floodgates. My third critiquing eye has opened and the planets have aligned. Hell as we know it is freezing over as I type. You have triggered a rant that is far too long and that I had to go back over to add commas in. I guarantee I missed something because that’s how long it went on. I didn’t have any ideas for specific future events in any storyline but I did go over the flaws in his writing, why they were flaws, and how to correct them in the future in a bullet-pointed list. You’re welcome.

Absolutely stop treating Alexis like she’s pure evil. As you’ve said, if it was truly that much of a problem, I don’t understand why the king would keep her around in the first place. The way Sam described his turning also gave me no indication that she turned him out of malice as opposed to concern. She doesn’t need to become a major character, but she needs to stop being brought up as if she’s Adam.

(I’m reading over this response and I want to add that from a character’s point of view of their own trauma, yes, they might 100% villainize and hate whoever caused that trauma. There’s no need for someone to forgive whoever traumatized them that badly, but there’s also a possibility to show a character’s maturity or growth by having them come to an understanding about why someone took the actions against them that they did. For example, I hate the people in my life who have abused me in the past, but I also understand that they were abused themselves, or I was just a person readily available to lash out against. It doesn’t mean I forgive them, the effects of my trauma have been healed, or that their actions were okay. It means I understand that they are people struggling through their own lives like I am. This is a very difficult conclusion to reach but is a remarkable sign of maturity. I’m in no way perfect either and I struggle reaching that point just like anyone else. Just look at my blog, I clearly have anger issues.)

As for other villains, a simple way to portray grey evils is to give them aspects that may be otherwise seen as “good.” They don’t have to be saints, but they may have specific biases you wouldn’t expect of someone bad. To pull up a possible idea for Quinn, perhaps something traumatic happened to him that left him on the streets and he began his nomadic lifestyle in order to help others who also were/feel ostracized from their families. He began helping strays or getting homeless people to shelters and picked up people along the way to help him. That doesn’t sound very “evil” does it? Then we could either have him on a “went mad with power” route, or we could say that the friend of Darlin’s that he killed violated a very personal rule or idea to him, and it resulted in that friend’s death. What was the violated rule or idea? Was it severe enough to justify that friend’s death? This could be as severe as killing someone or being framed for it versus maybe turning their back on a person in need. Was the friend’s death an accident and Quinn ran away without explaining himself, or Darlin’ won’t allow him to?

If attacking Frederick and Bright Eyes was still canon, that alone could be considered a grey area depending on how you go about it. Aside from his trespassing, vampires are made to prey on humans. Is he considered evil for not drinking from them “politely” or is he simply being a vampire and feeding himself? Humans don’t exactly ask for consent when killing wild animals for food, so is what Quinn did much different? That’s a very blurry area that could be debated, and there’s no true “right” answer to it.

This is an example of making a villain “reasonable.” Another I can think of is Vega, who is a compelling character that overstepped his boundaries and twists truths into ugly realities. Demons are also meant to feed on humans, albeit in a different manner, but was it right of him to trap people in an endless cycle of torment for a food source? On the one hand this is resourceful, and on the other this doesn’t take into account his two victims as individuals. His idea is reasonable if you break it down, but the manner he goes about it could be considered going too far, especially as what is established in canon law, which is what makes him a villain. He’s not wrong, but he’s not right either.

As for his more “pure evil” villains, for the love of God, if the fandom doesn’t see a villainous character as pure evil, he doesn’t need to make them worse. Despite how loud a certain portion of the fandom is, it overall was still fairly divided over Kody’s situation. Making a realistic allegory to sexual assault is a very heavy undertaking, and I applaud his desire to want to handle it properly in reference of real life college atmospheres. However, that attempt still failed in the end since about half the fandom didn’t see it as severely as he attempted to make it. Instead of ending this storyline where it seemed to have properly needed to end, he chose to continue it and made Kody be antagonistic where he didn’t need to be in order to make him seem more like an “evil” character. This was not only unnecessary since we already had the Inversion taking place as our major conflict that could break into several smaller conflicts, but it also seemed like a desperate attempt to make up for something he failed to do previously. He should have simply left the plotline alone and forgiven himself for the mistake, learned from where he failed and where he succeeded, and taken that knowledge with him to the next storyline. This same thing goes for incorrectly portraying “good” characters too.

If Redacted decides to have another major event like the Inversion, he needs to remove a major character for it to be impactful. While I would say he should kill them off, he doesn’t necessarily have to if he’s worried about the fandom reaction. Ivan didn’t have to die for his storyline to end. The impact would be heavier if a character died, but he could still “fake” a death and reveal in an Aftershock equivalent that they lived, but there’s some circumstance removing them from the major storyline. I’m not exactly sure if 1500 people can be considered a large or small number since we don’t know how many people were in that situation. However, if it was a large amount, then that number is probably too low, if it was a small amount, then there’s little chance every single major character and listener left that event nearly unscathed.

I said in another post to stop with the “political messages” and I realized later that it wasn’t exactly what I meant to say. Again, venting, my bad. A better way to word it might be “let characters be flawed, make lasting mistakes, suffer consequences for them, and work towards improvement.” He did this more in the beginning, and I genuinely can’t tell you why he might have changed this without making assumptions. In recent history, Redacted has been including talks about consent where they shouldn’t be and immediately covering up any possible conflict between the characters and their listeners. The prime examples I can provide of this, or that made me the most peeved perhaps, are what I added in the list about Geordi and Vincent.

In Geordi’s case, it feels inappropriate to begin his storyline eliminating a potential conflict that would likely be very prevalent with the characters involved. Which for this portion is Geordi and Cutie who’s a telepath. Rather than showcasing the characters and their potential plotline, at least to me it felt like the highlight of his first video was this conversation about “consent” when reading his mind. I’m in no way saying that this is bad, and let me say this for anyone who may happen across this post, I am in no way saying that including discussions about consent or boundaries is a bad thing. It’s more the fact that it was inappropriately placed from a narrative perspective. Anyways, this could have been a building conflict between the two where Cutie kept reading his mind, and maybe even just a video or two down the line, then he comes to them about the consent talk. Redacted could possibly expand on this by having Cutie slip up or put them in situations where they must read Geordi’s thoughts in order to communicate with him when he may not be able to “consent” to it. That could open the door to a major conflict that is readily within reach of the characters and has had prior content to build up to it. In Vincent’s case, Redacted once again threw away an aspect of conflict with Lovely being turned, which was Vincent’s ability to invoke them and lie to them. The king’s ability to remove these being ridiculous aside, this is another situation that could be built on with Vincent learning to control his ability to invoke or simply trying not to lie to Lovely. He could have slipped up in a video where he tells a small lie and apologizes, then tells the full truth. This would have been a much better method of portraying Vincent as caring and trustworthy, and would have probably been more endearing for people to listen to Vincent trying to make Lovely comfortable until telling the truth becomes natural for him. Aside from a conflict where Vincent lies to Lovely about something major happening, such as Quinn hurting Sam or some other major event we may learn about later or through other characters, there’s also the possibility he uses his ability to invoke to save them. The king saved Vincent by forcing him to drink blood, and Vincent could be forced to save Lovely in a similar manner despite his guilt for doing so. It could be making Lovely drink to parallel the moment with Vincent, or it could be something else entirely. Something minor could be making Lovely move if they’re paralyzed in fear, something major could be forcing them to injure or kill someone in self-defense. In both Geordi’s and Vincent’s scenarios, these actions are by no means okay just because their breaking of “consent” or other promises helped someone. That doesn’t mean Cutie or Vincent are villains for taking those actions, they were navigating a situation in a way they best knew how and it got them out of it alive. I’m no expert, but this is how characters, in this case the “good” ones, are generally portrayed as grey. They can still be considered “good” while saving the day in a manner that could be considered “wrong.” Despite my complaints of it, I liken this to Avior’s current situation where he messed up by hiding Starlight’s memory loss from them and is trying his best to explain himself and indirectly promise to better himself from his mistake. (Depending on how Starlight approaches their questioning of him, there’s a 50/50 chance of them forgiving him realistically. If I were in their situation, I would at least need some time away from Avior to think things through, but I again digress.)

These talks of “consent” or being in the “right” have come to my attention specifically because of the inappropriate placement and the elimination of conflict as if to play it safe. I find it difficult to believe that every single vampire in existence has been turned with consent, and delving deeper into that concept opens up a lot of very uncomfortable realities as a result. It’s ludicrous that vampires are somehow absolved of fault by asking a person on the verge of death if they’re willing to completely abandon their old lives in return for having to drink blood, live in the night, and live for eternity, expecting a response made in desperation of survival to be equivalent to consent given with a clear mind. In a way I can understand Sam’s reasoning for having this mindset, and in another I can understand that Lovely is already familiar with the concept of being turned and a vampire’s lifestyle, but these instances don’t come off as characters acting on past experiences or past knowledge. They come off as Redacted saying “consent is important.” Which is a good message, but these situations are far more complicated than simply “obtain consent before doing.”

Similarly, I don’t find Avior calling himself “manipulative” as something that his character would say. He didn’t even seem to act on those past events that happened before Starlight lost their memories to be considered “manipulative”, even from an outside perspective. At most he’s a liar that’s been hiding that fact from them, and that’s how I would expect this character to describe himself as. Maybe this is up for debate, but describing him “manipulating” Starlight as opposed to “lying” to them sounds more like an author’s words than a character that’s in that story, this idea being emphasized by other important but inappropriately placed messages Redacted has made. As for my bit about Frederick’s story being removed, I’ll refrain from talking about the reasoning I mentioned in the list since it’s more of a crude assumption.

Looking over everything again, I can add that if a character has a reliable support system, they shouldn’t be acting like their trauma from 20 years ago happened yesterday. At most, I’ve witnessed people with “resolved” trauma be mildly sensitive to discussing it, and the most sensitive on an “anniversary” of the cause of it. Both Vincent and Sam discussing their trauma sound as if they’ve been alone with no reliable person to help them work through their thoughts and emotions on those events, which makes the king and his clan sound distant and unavailable. The king’s interactions with Vincent as a reliable and supportive mentor, and Vincent and Sam's bond like brothers, feel completely forced when you take into account their reactions to those past events. These topics would undoubtedly have come up at some point and have been talked about with other characters, which would lighten the reaction they would have presently. This is probably the result of certain characters only being added in at a later time, and simply not enough forethought put into how the relationships between these two characters and “background” characters affect how they react to certain past events. In short, a lack of worldbuilding. This is still something Redacted could keep in mind for the future though.

For the last point I believe is a major aspect of Redacted’s to improve, here’s my thoughts on Darlin’s story. It boils down to the fact that Darlin’ in their story is constantly chastised and has their agency removed from them. Them hunting down Quinn’s scent is revealed to be a “blood bond” outside of their control. Sam chastised them for acting on their own and getting hurt as a result, and proceeded to chastise them for not having any food, or otherwise being bad at self-care. (This might be more of a personal opinion, but that particular video felt more to me like Sam was scolding a disobedient teenager than showing passive-aggressive affection for a potential love interest. You can imagine how uncomfortable I felt with the rest of those videos.) David and Sam’s follow-up conversation did not progress Darlin’ and Sam’s relationship. David then chastised Darlin’ for acting on their own and seemed to make it more about himself and the pack than about Darlin’, which again robs Darlin’ of their agency and puts their actions in a bad light. Another way I can put this is that there’s no middle ground conversation for Darlin’s behavior, it’s only them being punished for it like a misbehaving child and they don’t do it again. (Similar to how Bright Eyes was constantly put down with no middle ground, but their storyline was removed before their conflict could be expanded on.) There are no opportunities for Darlin’ to look powerful or independent that aren’t put down by other characters, which renders them being portrayed as horribly incompetent instead.

From a writing standpoint and not an emotional one, this plotline is a train wreck. I would say it’s up to par with other ASMR videos, which render listeners incredibly stupid and lacking any sort of agency, but I expect more from Redacted given every other listener he’s created. While not entirely in control, they still have a good amount of control over their narratives, which makes them more solid as individual characters. The fact that the fandom still takes away the idea that Darlin’ is powerful I would chalk up to their fascination with the idea of the character, and the emotional “manipulation” of hearing the characters’ voices, which is a far different experience from analyzing the story writing itself. I will admit, Redacted is a fairly good voice actor.

As for all my other points, I would say those are more trial and error mistakes that could be fixed as he went along, or otherwise tie back into my points above. I will add that the fandom certainly puts a lot of words into Redacted’s mouth, and more often than not are those words entirely obscured. Trying to dig for the truth doesn’t help my frustration with him, especially as he continues to make very questionable writing choices, but it’s not his fault his fandom lacks the ability to critically engage with his content. It is his fault for encouraging it.

I will say at least, that regardless of my personal opinion of him as a person (that being, he doesn’t exactly come off as someone I would find pleasant to be around), he has a lot of potential as a writer. If anyone sends this his way out of malice against me, include this sort of tl;dr message: Redacted has written a lot of mediocre but fun moments and a lot of great ones too. He’s got the potential to be a fantastic writer, and he’s got great ideas that could be shaped into a very memorable world. However, he’s only hindering himself by cutting out conflicts, doubling down on portrayals of “good” and “evil” characters, and playing it safe seemingly out of fear that his writing would be taken the wrong way. I believe even the most visceral reactions outside my own have assumed the best intentions from him, and I think he needs to similarly forgive himself for his mistakes, learn from them, and continue on while still taking risks and trusting in his own vision. If he finds himself written into a corner or his portrayals go the wrong way, he needs to either work with what he’s made or try to conclude it the best he can and try again with another story. Using retcons and cure-alls will not help him grow as a writer, and writing only fluff will hamper the impact of any major events that come in the future, nor will the actions of characters in those events likely make any narrative sense.

On a more personal note, he doesn’t have to be so concerned about “torturing” his fans with plot. He should be well aware that his fans are sensitive to all of his content, and over-exaggerate a lot of their reactions whether out of being frankly ridiculous, or just generally having an excited outburst from their enjoyment. While I won’t tell him to not be careful with his content, he can absolutely write impactful stories with gritty conflicts without being grim and dark all the time. Just look at the roots of his channel. There is a way to satisfy both people who want an actual plot and people who want a comfortable set of videos to relax to. However, he has to build up to those stories for that impact to be real. I’d say that he does drop bits of lore in his videos, and has done bits of foreshadowing here and there, and that’s just a skill that needs to be worked on to be perfected. That being said, he needs to stop expecting perfection from himself every time.

Redacted. If you won’t take it from the people who worship the ground you walk on, then take it from the crankiest person in this fandom: you do not need to be perfect. I’m not mad that he fails, I’m mad that he’s continuing to fail and sabotaging his own efforts. If he’s that concerned, then he should find people to critique his writing. Not people close to him or anyone from the fandom either, as that’s basically recruiting yes-men which, politely, he does not need. If he keeps trying to walk on eggshells, he will attract an audience that requires and expects that from him constantly, and no one can withstand the immense pressure that places on them forever.

This has gone on far too long. I’ve been writing this post too long and I probably missed some things too. As you can see, there’s a lot I’ve been wanting to say, and I just want to personally sit down with Mr. Redacted and hand him a mug that says “World’s Okayest Writer” and maybe on the back it says “for now.” Anyways. I’m done. If you need me to elaborate or actually talk about future events, anons are open. I’ll try my best to be civilized. Goodbye.

#i need a nap

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