#she's been worried sick over him and scared of him dying ever since his heart attack

[pssysht]

broken hearts mend | jake sully x OC fem ۵ PART2

summery: jake sully lost neytiri in the first battle (so no kids soz) he has been lost ever since, a loner, harsh on everyone and over all broken. no na’vi women could get near him, scaring them away with his sharp tongue.

neytiri was the other half of his soul, his missing piece. as a human jake never found a woman he was willing to kill for, willing to die for. until he was gifted with a new life, and he found her. she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, her skin soft like silk, her eyes bright and full of life. ever since he said goodbye to her, he wishes his brother never died, so he wouldn’t have been asked to replace him on the mission to pandora, so he would never have had to meet her.

flashback

neytiri fell to the ground, the bullet went straight through her, grazing jake. his own side poured with blood but he couldn’t feel it, he didn’t feel anything as he watched her body hit the ground. his knees collapsing beside her, pulling her to his chest.

‘don’t worry darling you’re going to be fine. HELP. it’s ok don’t cry’ he tried to speak without choking up, refusing to realise she was dying in his arms. he called for help, many na’vi women coming to his aid, they surrounded neytiri, giving eachother sorrowful glances. one of the women placed a hand on his shoulder.

‘jake- i’m sorry-‘ she was cut off

‘NO. just heal her. eywa please’ he begged as he held her tighter to him. her once bright eyes dulled as she looked up at him.

‘my jake’ she choked out, as his head whipped down to analyse her face

‘oel ngati kameie’ (i see you)

jake choked out a sob, his grip tightening on her body, as sobs rack through his body, hers grew limp. he lay her down on the ground, as the women around him looked at him with pity.

he stood up, facing the sky people, an anger so strong he felt as if he was floating, he grabbed neytiris bow, killing as many men as possible before the humans retreated. as soon as the chaos died down, he felt his body stop floating, everything that just happened hitting him like a ton of bricks. he broke down, screaming at his people to carry her body to the tree of souls.

present

after the girl left, jake sat himself on a rock inside the cave, his heart heavy as he cooked the food he had hunted for. his mind flicked to the girl once again. she was a lot shorter than him, hips full and face soft. he wondered why she travelled so far into the forest and why she was so scared to see him. but as quickly as she entered his mind, she left, as his brain fogged with memories of neytiri once again.

flashback

‘you’re like a baby’ neytiri teased jake. she’s been saying this since they met, and he could never get sick of hearing it.

they both walked hand in hand to the highest cliff, neytiri wanted to show him how beautiful pandora looks from above. as they reached it, they sat at the edge, their feet dangling freely as they stare into the view.

‘wow, it’s beautiful’ jake whispers, secretly looking at neytiri. she turned to him noticing his stare before blushing. smacking his arm lightly before pulling him into a soft kiss. jakes arm slides around her waist as he shuffles them back away from from edge.

neytiri climbs into his lap, her arm wrapping around his shoulders as she turns her face into the kiss, never wanting to leave. jake has never felt so in love as he lays her down, removing her loin cloth as the sun sets behind him.

present

mayu returns to the village, just in time for her mother yelling that the food is ready. her and her siblings race into their hut, speeding for first choice of food.

‘where were you today?’ her older brother asks as they stand together picking at the food. she looks up at him and shrugs,

‘i bumped into turak maktu today, i didn’t realise how far i had gone into the forest’ she whispers, not wanting her mother to hear of her endeavours. her brother, nobuo, raises his eyebrows in surprise. shrugging his shoulders he walks off to sit with father and begins eating. mayu shakes her head, and joins him.

she cant seem to get jake out of her mind. she’s seen him before, in the village but he seemed much more broken today, sharp and cold. she never really heard him speak to people, always supporting an angry look as people tried to make conversation. she cant help but feel sorry for him, she knows what happened to his mate, everyone here does, she cant imagine watching her mate die in her arms. mayu knows jake won’t return for a few days still, as a way to avoid any na’vi people still grieving.

she decides that tomorrow she will find him again, and bring him some fruit, and warmer clothes to help him through the storm tomorrow night.

jake sticks his head out of the cave, his ears perked up listening to the distant calls of rain, he should’ve known better than to travel without warmer clothes, incase of a storm. and now he’s screwed. he contemplates going back to the village but the image of neytiri at the foot of the tree of souls pushes him back into the cave. he will just wait it out. he will be fine.

as the fire dies down, his eyes close, falling asleep only to have nightmares of her. he wakes to the distant knocking on the walls of the cave. as he lifts his head, he sees the same girl from yesterday stood awkwardly at the entrance of the cave.

‘hello- i’m sorry to bother you again, it’s just i know there’s a storm coming and’ she’s cut off again as he stands up, storming over to her and pushing her out of the cave entrance.

she gasps as she catches her balance and looks up at him.

‘i told you to leave’ he snarls, not interested in whatever she has to say. he knows there’s a storm coming, he can hear it, he doesn’t need some needy girl to tell him.

‘fine. i just wanted to offer some help.’ mayu rolls her eyes, throwing the fruit and clothes onto the floor. she stomps her feet as she walks away, wishing she never helped that mean man.

jake looks down at the mess of her tantrum only to find exactly what he needs. he grabs the stuff and slides back into his cave, shaking his head at the girl, why did she insist on coming back, to help him? he ignites the fire again, eating some of the berries the girl had given him. he moans out as the sweet taste fills his mouth. he places the knitted shawl over his shoulders and arms as he feels instantly calmer and warmer. he wants to thank the girl for her help however his short temper pushed her away. though his thought is interrupted by a loud crackle of thunder ripping through the clouds. wind blows into the cave, his fire shaking as he tries to keep it alight.

mayu jumps as the thunder hits her ears. her feet pick up pace as she exits the forest running into her hut, where the rest of her family sit, patiently waiting for the storm to blow over.

‘mayu. you are in that forest more than you are home’ her mother scolds, sick of her daughter constantly disappearing. mayu nods with her head down as she joins her family, placing her own shawl over her shoulders and snuggling into her mothers embrace.

the storm worsens as the rain hits heavily onto the roof. small leaks forming as it drips onto mayus mother.

‘hekima! i told you the hut is not safe enough. what if this storm was worse? hm? we would not be safe here’ her mother scolds her mate, wiping the rain off of her forehead. mayu giggles at their bickering.

‘okay honey, i will fix it when the storm blows over’ her father retorts with a smile

‘irayo’ her mother replies sheepishly, embarrassed by her anger. they share a small peck as mayu and her siblings make gagging noises.

jake shakes as the tears roll down his cheeks. the cold only reminds him off the warmth neytiri gave him as they slept together under the stars, the fire infront of him only reminds him of the fire surrounding him as he watched his mate die. everything he looks at reminds him of her, he can’t imagine a day where he isn’t grieving for her, a day he can wake up and not immediately want to cry as he wakes up alone. and he most certainly cannot see a day he finds a new mate, no one could ever compare to his soulmate.

_________________

AYE. look at me getting part 2 out the next day. i really hope y’all enjoy the slow burning love story.. or will it be a love story??? who knows.

ALSO if y’all wanna know what i imagined when making my OC mayu here she is

she kinda resembles neytiri but her face is rounder and more innocent. ALSO YOU DONT HAVE to follow this image when reading, you can imagine mayu to look whichever way you please.

thanks for reading !!!!!

#avatar #avatar smut #ocs #jake x oc #avatar the way of water #jake sully #neytiri #avatar angst #avatar love story

[lunagojo]

Uzui Tengen and Rengoku Kyojuro w/ a S/O That Sleeps A Lot

(aka me. hi depression how are ya <3)

A/N: I'm gonna reopen requests soon I promise, I just needed a bit of time after my grandma passed away to just breathe. I appreciate you all for your patience <3

Uzui Tengen (and wives c:)

Let's say for the sake of these headcanons you're his fourth spouse :)

All four of them absolutely adore you and would do anything to keep you safe and happy, they're all extremely good listeners and very emotionally supportive <3

However they do tend to worry a bit about how much you sleep

Tengen does his best to make sure that there's a space in his estate for you to be comfortable. He goes all out and gets you the absolute best pillows, blankets, sheets, etc. and also makes sure the space is in a part of the home that is quiet

He also checks in with you when you've been sleeping for a long time, usually after a few hours he'll come in and ask you if you need anything or if you're feeling okay (sometimes -- often -- all the time it ends with him snuggling up to you and squishing you in his big ass arms)

He also always asks about your dreams that you have because he finds them extremely flamboyant.

Hinatsuru will bring you tea and snacks if you've been asleep for awhile to make sure that you're still eating/drinking. She constantly frets about your health and does whatever she can to keep you in tip top shape.

Makio, at first, won't understand why you sleep all the time. She sometimes would snap at you when you wake up or come downstairs in the middle of the afternoon after sleeping half the day away. However, when she realizes that you're just constantly exhausted, she'll soften up a bit. She'll never openly admit it, but she loves the way your face looks when you're asleep, she thinks it's very cute :3

Suma meanwhile always comes in and snuggles up to you. She was very worried for you for awhile because she thought you were either sick or dying but once you assured her that you were just always tired she was relieved. She still snuggles with you every time though because she wants to make sure you're okay

If anyone ever accuses you of being lazy or makes fun of you for it, best believe they'll have one pissed off Hashira and his three shinobi wives on them in a SECOND.

They are all very protective of you, 10/10 spouses that will love you for all your quirks and whatnot.

(can you tell i am a hardcore s i m p for these guys)

Rengoku Kyojuro

At first, this man was VERY worried.

He honestly thought you had an illness of some sort which terrified him to no end (since he lost his mother, he's so scared of losing someone else he loves)

He made you go get checked out by a doctor and everything just to be 100000% sure

Once that was done...well he still worried but not as much

Can and will lend you his haori for you to sleep in (it so warm and smells like him, so comforting and nice)

Since he's away for his work often, he'll leave you with his little brother to watch over you. Senjuro is someone he trusts more than anyone else (besides you of course) so he has no worries while he's away

Let's...just forget the comments Kyo's father had about you and your sleeping habits, yeah?

When he comes back from a job, you're the first person he goes to

Usually you're asleep but he doesn't mind, he'll still crawl in beside you and pull you close to him

You typically make this small noise of contentment and nuzzle into him, which he just... MELTS at

It's those moments with you he lives for

This guy loves with all of his heart, he would never ever ever let anything happen to you or hurt you.

Your sleeping habits are just another thing that make you, you. As long as you're physically healthy and mentally healthy, he's happy, too.

Though...if you're not well mentally, he is always there for you, if you need to talk or just need to be hugged and held. He wants you to know how loved you are, by both him and Senjuro

Kyo will also bring you tea each morning before he goes off to train. Bless his heart <3

All in all 11/10 king boyfriend / husband

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer x reader #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #demon slayer headcanons #kimetsu no yaiba headcanons #kyojuro rengoku #uzui tengen

[pony-central]

The Flu Shot

Sick Boyfriend was shaking in his seat. Today was his monthly flu shot. He didn't like the sound of this. He had always been afraid of needles, ever since his childhood.

DrugFriend: Now, Sick Boyfriend. It's just a little jab. Not the end of the world.

Sick BF: *shakily* To you it isn't! I'm scared, DrugFriend! 😟

DrugFriend: Buddy, I promise that there's nothing to worry about. The sooner we get it done with, the sooner we can get outta here. Hospitals give me the creeps, too.

DrugFriend was also afraid of the doctors. Last time he had been in the hospital, it was to say goodbye to his dying grandmother. She had contracted lung cancer. Her death still left a hole in DrugFriend's heart. He teared up a little.

Sick BF: Aww, Drugsy... 😔

Nurse: Sick Boyfriend? Come with me. You best bring your husband too, for emotional support.

Sick Boyfriend was terrified. He hated needles. He slowly walked in, shaking all the while. DrugFriend followed him.

DrugFriend: Shh. There there. Come on. You can get through - Uh. Sick Boyfriend! Please don't cry! 😟

Sick BF: *with tears down his face* OK! 😢

Sick Boyfriend sat on the bed as the nurse took away his coat. She tossed it to the side.

Nurse: Now, Sick Boyfriend. Remember. I'll go nice and easy on the area I'm jabbing you.

She rolled up his sleeve. She decided on the left arm. Sick Boyfriend was right handed anyway. As soon as she got the needle our, she took off its cover, revealing the point. Sick Boyfriend was shaking and shaking. He couldn't take his eyes off the needlepoint.

And then... The crying happened.

Sick BF: *suddenly bursts into tears*

DrugFriend: Oh, shit! 😟

Nurse: Is he always like this? 😟

DrugFriend: 95% of the time. He's just sensitive. Sick Boyfriend, can we please get this flu jab over with? There are thousands of people waiting for theirs. 😔

Sick BF: *wailing* BUT THAT NEEDLE IS SCARY! 😫😭

DrugFriend: Just get it over and done with! So I can go home! 😩

Sick BF: *more crying in fear*

Nurse: Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry. I didn't know that you were terrified of needles. 😟

Sick BF: *while crying* Just get it over with! 😭

Nurse: OK. 😔

She carefully puts the needle into his arm and injects the serum into his arm. Sick Boyfriend had to bite his lips to prevent a scream from escaping his body.

Sick BF: *whimpering* Oh...

Nurse: See? That wasn't so bad, was it? 😊

Sick BF: Uh - Huh.

Nurse: Here's your reward.

She hands him a chocolate bar.

Sick BF: Thanks, Nurse.

DrugFriend: Buddy, you did it! I'm so proud of you! 😊

DrugFriend hugged Sick Boyfriend. Sick Boyfriend hugged him back.

Nurse: His next appointment is in 30 days.

DrugFriend: Good to know. Come on, Sick Boyfriend. Let's go to McDonald's to celebrate.

Sick BF: OK, Drugsy! 😊

@princesshillaryellaworld25

#fnfspongebobparodies #friday night funkin #shrugfriend #Scriptwriting #Daily ShrugFriend

[unohanadaydreams]

DAMAGE DONE FOR KENPACHI SOULMATE CAN YOU IMAGINE THE A N G S T AND CONFUSION

 I know ppl who follow this blog have taste because you were the the first of four ppl to ask for this exact combo jdhdjsjs. We are all Kenpachi brain rot compliant.

Features: Cutting/self harm, a real shit start to a relationship, and angst.

Bleach Your Soul: Ask Meme

Kenpachi Zaraki + Damage:

So much of your life was defined by isolation. A patient treated terminal. Everyone paid you the same attention they would a ghost, fleeting smiles and tears that fell over your bed as though it were a grave.

How could you not feel tortured and angry, to be saddled with a soul mate determined to drag you through hell with them? There were times you truly believed were your last. Stabs too close to your guts. Slashes peeling open to far towards your heart.

There was little room in your thoughts to worry about who suffered with you, other than to curse them. Whether they struggled to live or delighted in violence, you didn’t know. You didn’t care. It was hard to care about anything while laying in your deathbed. Through childhood, your heart withered like the flowers always dying on your window sill. If only they’d throw you away for good, as well.

You garnered hobbies to keep busy rather than to enjoy them. Your stitching, calligraphy, and precocious little drawings stained in blood more often than not. The 4th division was your jail. Your soulmate, your warden. Keeping you there, always.

For years, you begged them. Desperate to be heard--to have a modicum of fucking control--, you carved words into your skin. Were they scared the first time you did it? Did they hate it? Did it hurt them?

Vindictive, you hoped all your horrible thoughts were so. When you cut ‘stop. stop. stop. stop.’ you did it on your side and hip, so it would reopen. Again. And again. And again. And--

They never responded. No matter what you wrote. ‘Please stop.’ ‘It hurts.’ ‘Doesn’t it hurt you?’ ‘I hate you.’ ‘Who are you.’ ‘Don’t you care?’ ‘Kill me.’ ‘Die.’ ‘I’m sorry.’ 

Slowly, then suddenly, the damage that had been near daily stopped for so many years stopped. Your family settled you back in the home, a living urn. They said your name and stroked your cheek and smiled too small when you spoke.

Your skin buzzed with the absence of what had plagued your entire youth. Was it sickness or shame that drove your blade through your skin still? Did you just miss it? Was the violence boiling you alive with no where to spill out anymore?

There were times you swore minuscule nicks would appear, healing too fast to smooth over, but staying long enough to feel. Older, able to be among people, you realized what that could mean. What kind of person you’d told to die as a pithy little tween.

Were they alive--really alive? Did anyone else care or were you the only one?

‘Songbirds.’ ‘Hello.’ ‘Your name?’ ‘Sorry.’ ‘Work sucks.’ ‘Too hot.’ ‘Alive?’ ‘Hotpot.’ ‘Cut words.’ ‘Please.’ ‘Alive?’ ‘Shinigami.’ ‘13th.’ ‘Rank?’ ‘Rukongai?’ ‘I’m sorry.’

@

Retsu Unohana, the only woman he couldn’t quite look in the eye, was there to smile all serene-like over him. After he’d lost. Figures she’d be there when he fucking lost.

She asked him all those annoying questions about how his body felt and told him all the things he needed to heal from. He wanted to shake her like Yachiru did when he wasn’t paying attention enough for her liking. Who gave a shit about all that--he lost and got what he deserved. He had to get stronger. Just because she’d abandoned her pride didn’t mean he would. 

“Your soulmate is here, too.”

Kenpachi couldn’t ignore that one. He never ignored that one. Not that they let him, with all their fucking writing. Saying the strangest shit sometimes too.

When he was young, he’d been paranoid, not knowing what the fuck was doing the writing. He’d swing his sword over his calf or side or thigh, expecting to lob and invisible arm off. Running, Kenpachi would try to out pace the fucker.

 Yumichika explained it like having one was exciting. Ikkaku had yelped for Yumichika to knock it off as the man with beautifully kept hands had given himself a paper cut.

“See? It means the person you’re meant for feels everything you do on the battlefield.” His colorful eyelids narrowed, sights shifting between his captain and Ikkaku. “Or in the file cabinet, if either of you would bother to help out.”

The more he understood--and thought about it--the less he wanted to meet them. His soulmate. Kenpachi wasn’t a person who forgave weakeness and anyone meant for him wouldn’t either, right?

He’d been consumed by sleepless nights, futile attempts to nap, and brutal training sessions, trying to keep his failures out of mind after the realization. What if Yachiru had been forced to take every blow the same as he had? Whenever he tucked in his lieutenant, the question ate at him further.

With time, there had come some form of solace--one day he’d find the thrill of a horrible battle again, to drown the thoughts out. But what Ichigo Kurosaki had offered hadn’t been horrible in the way he’d imagined. And here he was, face turned away from Unohana’s thinly veiled impatience, his feelings too complicated to bother with fully.

“Well?”

Unohana stood, like she was disappointed and Kenpachi couldn’t help but snap at her, “Fine. Whatever.”

She smiled, soft as she’d gotten, and went to the door. “Fine to what? I only told you they’re here. But if you’re so determined to see them, Captain Zaraki, follow me.”

@

Grumbling about how much he hated ‘that sneaky shit’, Kenpachi did follow her, and went through the door she gestured at before being closed in with your recovering body. Your body hadn’t healed as fast as his, but that wasn’t a surprise--you’d be a captain for sure if you could pull that shit off.

Worst of all, you were awake, the scar lining one side of your face as thick as his own. No one else was in the room with you. There were no flowers or cards. And your mouth was hanging open.

“You’re alive.”

“Yeah well,” Kenpachi didn’t know what to say, trailing off as one of his fingers brushed over his thigh.

“Everyone is talking about your fight,” you said, filling his silence with a light shrug. “I figured it was more than coincidence that I ended up like this at the same time. I’m glad it was you and not the ryoka.”

“You thought that kid was your soulmate?”

“How was i supposed to know? No one’s seen him since your fight, or so they’re saying.”

“The scar’s pretty fucking obvious.”

“Uh, I’ve never seen you before and it’s not like you’re ever in the Seireitei Bulletin or...or wandering around where people could find you!”

Kenpachi winced, not because of your words, but because the closer he got, the more your sweat and shaking arms showed. You must’ve been like this for a lot of your life. A worming feeling of guilt he seldom felt curled in his belly. Now that he had a person to pin to the thought, it swelled large.

Maybe if he were a softer person, someone rounded out like the long gone Yachiru turned Unohana, he’d say something comforting or concerned or even charming. But his hand was still on his thigh and his mounting frustration at himself, all revolving around his lack of strength, felt thick on his tongue.

“This mean you’re gonna stop with the fucking words?”

You pulled your head back slow, looking up at him like you couldn’t decide between succumbing to exhaustion or lunging at him.

“What if I don’t? What if I just keep going till you respond?”

“You’ll keep going until ya die.”

“Well, great! There’s you’re answer,” you scoffed. “You’ll have to kill me.”

It was a shit start, all things considered, and the silence that took over the room as Kenpachi sat on the nearest chair, so hard it almost cracked, felt as horrible as his zanpakuto refusing to answer him.

“The name’s Kenpachi Zaraki,” he said, resolved to at least get your name.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Damn right, you do. Now tell me yours.”

You wouldn’t have introduced yourself if he hadn’t looked so...well, you couldn’t quite tell what he looked like. Tired, maybe. Tired and wanting something.

So you gave him your name, your relief that he was alive, that you hadn’t wished him to his grave in your youth, outweighing your anger. An apology for putting you here was like grasping at the sky and hoping to hold a star, if his reputation proceeded him. So you let it go as best you could.

And Kenpachi settled back in the chair, grunting in acknowledgement. He didn’t think learning your name was gonna make him stronger, but it felt nice to hear someone talking to him like a person and not a beast.

If he was being honest, it’d always felt nice to be given your words, when so many people refused to give him any. A bit awkwardly, he stayed while you fell victim to sleep, your breath slow before he spoke again.

“Thanks.”

#kenpachi zaraki #kenpachi x reader #kenpachi zaraki x reader #bleach imagines #bleach fanfic #kenpachi having to grapple with his love for battle having direct consequences on someone he comes to care for more and more #and reader having to decide if they can move past the fuck ton of harm he's done to them or if they can't make peace with it #especially since he is not going to apologize for it #like lmao Kenpachi you keep calling Unohana a weak coward in your mind but just you wait JUST YOU WAIT #can you bare to lose the only one who loves you when both yachirus are dead and no greater enemy than a god will ever come again #tybw with this au would be pain #bc tbh i don't think reader would make it #unless they were also put in a pod

[thatharringrovehoe]

This whole Mob AU has it's hooks in me ya'll so here you go.

Criminal King Steve courting his Queen.

- It happens like this. Steve has always been spoiled. Has the whole "I want it, I got it" mentality. And that's applied to lovers to. He lost his virginity at the age of fifteen to Amanda Grady behind the hardware store. But Anthony Mueller was his first kiss at eleven years old. You see the WHOLE TOWN knows not too fuck with Steve Harrington. It's not that he'll kick your ass, cuz he won't. Has never laid a hand on another soul. But Kings usually don't. They have grunts for that. And since the age of seven Tommy has been laying kids out for King Steve AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT. Cuz of course Mr. Harrington appreciated someone taking care of Steve. Meant he didn't have to. So Tommy never gets detention EVER. And while he doesn't go parading his boyfriends around (he's not stupid), no one ever gives him shit for it when he has a "friend" sleep over on a Wednesday night at the age of seventeen and comes to school covered in hickies the following Thursday morning.

- So when Billy beats Steve's keg stand record at Tina's Halloween party and comes vaulting his drunk ass over that damn couch to stare Steve down, Steve is fucking living. This boy is a hurricane trapped inside the most gorgeous body he's ever scene and he wants. And King Steve always gets what he wants. Gives a lazy smile and gets up really close to Billy. "I'm impressed Heartbreaker. Must not have much of a gag reflex huh?"

- And Billy is not ready for this sober let alone post keg stand. Cuz his dad moved them cross country to scare the "queer" out of him and this boy is so so pretty. He should take a step back. Regroup. Push him away. But he doesn't.

- King Steve takes him back to his lonely castle and ruins him. Spreads him out on silk sheets in a four poster bed like he's something precious. Something adored. Something worth the trouble and the time. Goes home in the morning sore enough that he's walkin a little funny but in all the best ways.

- After that though? Billy notices things get a little strange. Because when he first got here all the girls lined up just to stare as he got out of his car. Now? Now they wave at him. Like they've been friends for years. And what the hell? He's blatantly late for class and doesn't get a tardy slip. At lunch after all of the chocolate muffins are gone the lunch lady somehow procures one with frosting on it for Billy free of charge. It has him on edge. He knows good things are never free and it seems he's running quite the tab. Makes him antsy, waiting for the catch. But when Steve waves him over to eat lunch with his advisors and generals he relaxes a little. Cuz maybe that's just what it means to have friends in high places.

- Not only that but his dad isn't even suspicious. Has absolutely nothing to say about the new boy he's been hanging with. Doesn't even know he exists which. Weird. Because his dad has always been the type to ask around about his son. Makes sure Billy and his sick twisted desires don't come back to embarrass Neil. But he's not gunna look a gift horse in the mouth.

- And Steve keeps giving him things. The new Metallica album a week before it's out (how in the fuck...?), a black leather jacket that's buttery soft to the touch, even gives him a new earing. A dangling cross with a diamond in the center. And Billy knows he looks good okay? Is confident in his skills in bed. So initially he's sure that's why Steve treats him like this. Cuz they've fallen into bed together almost every other day since Tina's party and it's good. Fucking fantastic sex alright? Billy's never had anyone as good as Steve Harrington. So if the king wants to throw pretty baubles at him then so be it. It's not like it's a struggle or anything.

-But then Billy gets sick. Like he's not dying (he would very much argue this) but it's a bad flu bug. High fever, aches and pains the whole bit. Billy doesn't get out of bed for two days. It's so bad even his dad lays off to an extent. So when the doorbell rings Max has to get it even though technically Billy is babysitting while Susan and Neil are out for date night. And there stands Steve Harrington with an easy smile and a plastic bag full of cold medicine and homemade soup.

- And Max is low key freaking the FUCK out because her friends at school told her all about king Steve. Mike's sister is his best friend so he actually sees the kids quite often. And while Mike isn't his biggest fan he still concedes he's a pretty nice guy whenever it comes to them. Brings them the GOOD sugary snacks and a pizza whenever he stops by during their DnD campaigns. But she also knows he's probably the most powerful person in town. Has got Will's older brother on his payroll. Has somehow heard about Billy being sick when she hasn't told anyone. So she's wary when he asks to come in and see Billy. Cuz even if he's an asshole he's her brother and if this guy is here to fuck with him then she's gunna stage a coupe.

- But Steve just smiles big and sheepish. Tells her he was worried when Billy didn't show up to school. Wanted to know if he was okay. Made soup and everything. So she lets him in and directs him to the door down the hall on the left where Billy is working through a fever of 101.2. Tells him she loves her brother very much. That she'll be in the next room over. Then turns around and runs to her room, her red hair a battle flag in the wind. Steve likes her instantly.

- Billy was super out of it the whole time but he's pretty sure Steve Harrington stopped by and fed him soup. Gave him expensive cold medicine that knocked him the fuck out and read to him when he wavered in and out of consciousness. And that.. That's dangerous. Because Billy knows that's not something you do for just anyone no matter how good of a fuck they are. That's something you do for someone you have feelings for. And Billy can't have that. That's not how his life works. He doesn't get to keep someone like Steve. But when Billy goes back to school Steve is there waiting by his locker with a smile and a coffee made just the way Billy likes it. Feels his heart flutter like the traitorous little mother fucker it is. And falls in love with Steve Harrington right there five minutes before English on a Monday morning.

#Mob AU #Harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove #billy hargrove/steve harrington #Mad Max #maxine mayfield #I'm in love with this you guys prepare for more. #stranger things

[buckttommy]

If you could write one S5 scene for 9-1-1, with a song playing in the background, what would happen in the scene and what song would be playing? (also, hello!)

hiya!

in the spirit of us allegedly getting the scene of eddie crying tonight, i do actually have this scene in my head (that includes a lot more swearing) where eddie is standing in the locker room, changing out of his clothes for the day.

his movements are short, jerky, fingers fumbling over the buttons on his shirt. he's angry, but when isn't he these days? it seems like it takes nothing for latent fury to rise up in his bones. most of the time, it never goes anywhere, always rising just to fall again, but this time, eddie's anger has a source.

a tall, stubborn, annoyingly attentive source.

buck stands at the door of the locker room with his arms crossed over his chest. eddie doesn't even have to turn around to know he's there. of course he's there; eddie's so attuned to buck's body he thinks -- knows -- he could pinpoint his location just from the way his hair stands on the back of his neck, the way buck's gaze on him feels like a warm hand stroking down his spine.

it's comforting, most times. especially when they're out in the field. tonight, it just makes him feel exposed.

the locker room empties out one by one until it's just him and buck, and the silence that descends upon them is thick and charged. eddie remains turned toward the lockers.

"what do you want, buck?"

"i want you to talk to me."

talk to him, he says. eddie almost laughs. like it's that easy.

"there's nothing to say."

"bullshit," buck hisses. "you had a panic attack at work. when the helicopter--

"i know what happened," eddie says quickly. too quickly perhaps, if the annoyed little huff buck gives behind him is any indication. seeing that chopper go down brought up enough bad memories to last a lifetime.

"you know what happened," buck says, voice flat. then, "jesus christ," he mutters.

eddie hopes, perhaps foolishly, that that's the end of it. that buck will be so angry, so disgusted with him that he'll just walk away and let the conversation drop until the next time it inevitably comes up again, but eddie should know better, really, because buck's never been a quitter even when he should be.

buck steps fully into the room, and it's like every molecule of energy between them comes alive. eddie almost imagines he can feel his warmth.

buck stands in his peripheral vision. "you don't get it, do you? do you know what this is like for me? do you get that? seeing you walking around every. fucking. day like nothing's wrong, when i know you're dying inside?"

"i'm fine, buck."

"you're not fine!"

eddie freezes. it's the first time he's ever heard buck raise his voice like that. they've argued, brutally, but he's never heard that note to buck's voice--shaky and desperate and infuriated and... scared, yeah. there's a whole lot of fear there too. he doesn't know what to do with it.

"you're not fine," buck continues. "or did you think i wouldn't know that you haven't slept in two days. yeah," buck says when he catches the startled look on eddie's face, "you can thank christopher for that little tidbit since he called me yesterday past midnight wondering if a person could die from not getting enough sleep. that was a fun conversation to have."

eddie sharply turns to face buck. fuck. he'd thought--he'd thought he'd been keeping it together, thought that he'd been keeping himself in check so that at least chris didn't have to see. especially not after the suit shopping thing.

he swallows hard. "what did you tell him?"

"i told him that he had nothing to worry about. that i'd be over this weekend to make sure you were getting your rest."

it's a non-answer but it must have been enough to assuage chris's worries.

eddie clears his throat. "i--thank you. i didn't--know he'd been... worried."

"he's not a little kid anymore. he sees more than you think he does."

"yeah."

"and if he knows you're not okay, why don't you?"

it's the wrong thing to say.

eddie can't say why it's that little sentence that does it. even later, when he thinks about it, he can't say for sure--whether it was the inflection in buck's voice, or the fear behind his eyes, or the disappointment eddie was sure he must have felt, or maybe just a miserable combination of all three. but one minute eddie's standing in front of his locker -- their locker -- waiting for buck to say his piece so the conversation can end, and the next...

the next he breaks.

eddie slams the locker door shut. "is that what you think this is? you think i don't know that i'm not okay?" he can hear the note to his own voice -- flat and cold and numb all at the same time. "you think i don't know i haven't been okay since well before the shooting, or the tsunami, or hell, shannon? jesus christ, buck, it's all i know. i wake up every morning surprised that i even woke up at all. it's like i can't even breathe without thinking something's going to kill me, whether it's this... this fear i can't shake, or the job, or something else. every morning i wake up and i'm surprised that i get to see my son one more time. my son, who i can barely let my son out of my sight, by the way, because every time he leaves the house, i don't know if it's the last time i'll ever see him. and then once i get started on that train of thought, it's like i can't stop. what's the last thing i said to him? if something happens, does he know i love him? and sometimes i'm right, and i do good, and the last thing i said is 'i love you' but then other times it's 'don't forget to tell your teacher you have a dentist appointment friday' and i feel sick because the last thing my kid will ever hear from me is nothing that tells him how much i adore him, and how proud i am of him, and how he's saved me in more ways than he knows by just existing."

eddie's eyes burn hot with tears. it's like his brain has detached from his mouth, but the words keep coming and he's powerless to stop them.

[this song starts playing]

"but i'm fine, right?" he continues. "it's fine. i'm not going to be that dad who keeps my kid caged in a house because i can't control my fears, so i let him go to school, and hang out with his friends, and maybe if i'm lucky, both of us are going to survive the fucking day. and then i get to work, and it's like it all starts over again. hen's late, and the first thing i think is that she's dead in an accident. chim comes in looking exhausted and upset, and i think, oh god something's wrong with maddie and the baby. and you--" eddie lets out a dark laugh. "goddamn you. i let you out of my sight and it's like my heart fucking stops until i see you again. i let you out of my sight, and i think the next time i see your face, it'll be covered in blood, or the next thing i hear will be you scream in pain, and it scares me because i don't know who i am or who i'm going to be if i lose you. and it never stops. it never fucking stops. all the voices, and the pain, and the fear, it's all there, and it's choking me. so no, buck, i'm not okay. i'm not fucking okay, and i need help."

his voice cracks on the last word, every bitter fear and anxiety now spilled into the open, and there's a moment, just a moment, where all buck can do is stare.

he feels torn open from skull to sternum, eddie's pain is so sharp visceral he swears he feels it mirrored in his own body. swears that if he looks down, he'll see nothing but a mess of blood spilling from all the open wounds in his flesh, and it feels like death.

so there's a moment, where buck stands and he bleeds and he dies.

but then. then, he grabs eddie into his arms. it's almost violent, the way he grips him -- too rough and too tight and too fierce, but eddie grips him back just as tight, face buried in his neck.

"it's okay," buck chokes, "it's okay, it's okay, we'll get you some help, it's okay, we're okay, you're not alone, it's okay" and he presses his lips to the top of eddie's head, to the side of his face, anywhere he can reach, just so he can touch and soothe as much of him as he possibly can. and they just stand there holding each other, shaking apart in each other's arms until the scene fades to black.

#this got longer than i meant for it to! #oh well #jack answers mail #i know you sent this yesterday but i didn't have time to write all this yesterday lol #my fic

[redrobin-detective]

all is well

Death is nothing at all, I have only slipped into the next room I am I and you are you Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. ~ Henry Scott Hollard

AO3 link

______________

He hadn’t meant to say it, that much was clear. As much as she wanted to hate him for it, claim it was some sort of cruel manipulation; she knew he was just as distressed as she was. The ghost boy had covered his mouth, bright green eyes wide with panic as his misspoken words brought their battle to a screeching halt. Even the ghost the three hunters had been fighting stopped and stared before flying off. No one moved to stop them. Phantom looked at her fearfully, then over at her companion before vanishing without a trace.

It was a slip of the tongue, an accident, so why did the ghost boy calling her Mom make her blood run so cold?

“I’ve knew a kid who called the teacher Mom one time but I’ve never heard it from a ghost,” the Red Huntress said with a sarcastic chuckle. But her shoulders were tense and it was clear the situation made her uncomfortable too. “You okay, Mrs. Fenton?”

“My son isn’t dead,” Maddie said quietly. She would admit there were times where she’d look at Phantom and see Danny overlaid on top of him but those moments were becoming more and more rare. Maddie liked to think it’s because she could find more differences than similarities between the two but honestly, she couldn’t say who her son was anymore. She saw this damned ghost more than she saw the child living in her own house.

“I know, I’ve seen him around,” Huntress said with steady conviction. It made Maddie pause, as it always did, to wonder just how old Amity’s other human ghost hunter really was. Or how young rather. “It was a mistake, he’ll probably avoid you for a bit out of embarrassment but then things will go back to normal.”

“Yeah, a mistake,” Maddie muttered to herself, finally lowering the gun even though the fighting had ended several minutes ago. Why was this whole thing so unsettling to her? Phantom had said much worse things to her, called her a fake scientist and more obsessive than a ghost. He’d even called her a bad mother once when he’d been particularly riled up. She remembered how offended and angry his unnatural eyes had been as they’d glared accusingly into her.  

“You know his parents are still alive,” Huntress said suddenly. “I found out by accident a little while ago.” She was still standing on her hoverboard about 3 feet off the ground, her gaze was trained away from Maddie. “They don’t know that he’s a ghost, that he’s Phantom,” the girl’s head was still turned away from Maddie but she had a feeling she was being watched none the less. “Maybe you remind him of his mother.”

Maddie felt liked she’d been slapped.

“And why does that matter to you?” she questioned defensively to cover how much the conversation was shaking her - they didn’t know how could they not know, how could they not miss - “I thought you hated him as much as we did.”

“I don’t like him,” the Huntress said vehemently. “He’s annoying and acts like he’s the only hunter in this town who can actually do the job. But I,” she paused, “I think I understand him, just a little bit. Enough that I’ve been combing through Amity’s missing children files in my spare time. Of course, it’s no good if no one reported him missing in the first place. Phantom doesn’t want me prying but it’s not right for a kid to die and no one to care.”

“He’s just a ghost,” Maddie said, her words weak even to her ears. Was that why Phantom was stuck here? Because he died forgotten and unmourned? The thought of one of her children, her babies, dying without her knowing... she was going to be sick.

“Yeah, he is,” Huntress nodded, “but he wasn’t always. And humans deserve to be remembered, even if they don’t want to be.” That said, the girl sped off into the setting sun, the varying shades of orange glinting off of her suit. Maddie stood in the middle of the street for a little while longer, gun pointed limply at the ground as her whole world spun.

She drove home slowly, taking the long way around to try and put her conflicting feelings into words before she talked to her husband. When she and Jack first began their research into ghosts, they told themselves that they had to divorce themselves from the people the ghosts had been before. If you focused on the lingering traces of humanity in every monster then they would never be put in their place. But she was human and she had kids around the ghost boy’s age, despite her attempts to stick to logic her heart ached with sympathy.

“And you call yourself a mother,” the Phantom in her memory spat at her, filled with hatred but underneath it all was grief. “Where are your kids now? All you care about is the dead but when are you going to care for the living?” Maddie tightened her grip on the steering wheel to keep her hands from shaking.

“Mads! You’re home!” Jack grinned enthusiastically as she quietly entered the house. “Jazzy has her nose in her books and you know Danny, in and up to his room without a word so I made us grilled cheese!” He held her a plate with a flourish, “they’re ghost shaped!” The world tilted itself a little more onto it’s proper axis, no matter how crazy things got, Jack would always be her true north.

“Gracias,” she said accepting the plate. “Can we talk, privately?” She gestured her head down to the basement. Conversations from the kitchen could easily be heard upstairs and she really didn’t want her children to overhear her asking if she was a bad mom. She didn’t want their confirmation that she was right.

Jack’s goofy grinned smoothed out into something softer and he put one hand gently on her back as they walked down to basement. He kicked her usual stool her way and they sat in silence while they ate their dinners, staring at the swirling vortex of the portal.

“You remember that time Phantom called me a neglectful mother?” Maddie asked quietly after a few minutes.

“Mads, you can’t let that sneaky spook get to you. Everyone knows you’re a great-”

“Jack,” she interrupted harsher than she needed to but she didn’t need comfort from a husband but the unbiased opinion of a fellow scientist. “He accidentally called me Mom while we were fighting today, I don’t - I don’t think he meant it, he looked more scared then I’ve ever seen him before he ran off. Huntress was there too, she said.” Maddie gripped her plate tightly in her hands. “She said that Phantom’s family is still alive, that they don’t know about him.”

“Not know? You mean about him being-”

“Apparently,” Maddie squeezed her eyes shut to fight off the unwanted sympathy she felt. “He’s always been the Ghost Boy, the Ghost Kid. I never - I never fully absorbed what that meant. He looks,” Maddie set the plate aside and dropped her head into her hands. “He’s about Danny’s age.”

“Maddie,” Jack said softly, setting aside his own plate and wheeling himself closer. “Whoever that boy was, he’s gone now and all that’s left is an echo, an obnoxious and powerful echo but he’s not... he’s not a child. Not anymore.”

“But he remembers,” Maddie gasped, angry she was letting herself get all worked up over a stupid ghost. “He called me Mom, Jack. Huntress, she said maybe I reminded him of her and,” her eyes filled with tears now. “He’s comparing me to someone who didn’t even notice that he’d died. What does that say about me? About my relationship with our children? I feel like all I do is argue with Jazz these days and god knows where Danny goes to half the time-”

“Maddie, don’t do that to yourself,” Jack said softly, tilting her face up towards him with a gloved hand. “Once you go down that rabbit hole, there’s no digging yourself out. I think it’s just part of being a parent, always worrying that you’re not doing things right. Sometimes,” Jack gaze dropped, troubled. “Sometimes I enter the room and Danny looks at me and freezes like he expects me to do something terrible... He’s just easily startled but it still hurts.”

“Phantom is an echo, not a child,” Maddie nodded quietly to herself, trying to fall back on her usual logic but it tasted wrong in her mouth. He was a ghost... but also a child. “I wonder what he was like when he was alive? His personality seems remarkably preserved, he must have been a vibrant young man.”

“Or his death was particularly traumatic,” Jack mumbled. “Painful deaths usually leave powerful ghosts. And most healthy teens don’t just drop dead for nothing.”  A chill fell over the lab.

“How could they not notice?” Maddie whispered with horror. “What sort of parent wouldn’t see that their child was dead, what? Now two years in?”

“Not everyone is as good a mom as you are, Mads,” Jack said, pulling her into his chest. “Neglectful parents are a dime a dozen sadly. He could’ve been a runaway too, ran off and died leaving his folks still holding out hope that he’d come home. Or maybe...” he frowned, “maybe he’s pretending he’s still alive.”

“No, he couldn’t keep the charade for this long,” Maddie gasped but the horrible idea had been planted none the less. Phantom always seemed in such a hurry, like he had somewhere else to be. Was another woman tapping her feet as she waited for her boy to return like Maddie often did, not knowing her child was long gone?

“He’s a wily one, incredibly solid for a spirit. Sometimes I look at him and swear I see his chest moving like he’s breathing. Dampen his glow, dye the hair, change his clothes, he could probably pass as human so long as you didn’t look too close.”

“Jack,” she pulled back and looked at her husband in a panic. “Jack, if he’s pretending to be human when he’s not fighting then there’s a good chance he goes to Casper.” Her and Jack’s eyes widened with realization at the same time.

Their children’s high school has had an unprecedented amount of ghost attacks since the portal opened. They could never figure out why the ghosts targeted that school and ignored the other elementary, middle or even the other public high, Wendy. “What are we going to do, should we pull out Danny and Jazz? Even just until we figure this out.”

“That might tip the ghost off,” Jack said evenly but his teeth were biting into his cheek with worry. “We don’t want to set him off, who knows what he’d do if his cover was blown.” He might look like a harmless teen but Maddie had seen first hand how devastating Phantom could be when threatened. “I think we should tell the kids.”

“What? Why? You know they’re supportive of him!” Well Jazz certainly was, differing opinion on Phantom seemed to be the cause of half their arguments. Danny, truthfully, she didn’t really know his opinions on the ghost boy. He always looked so uncomfortable talking about ghosts with them so they just didn’t.

“Supportive maybe but they’re smart and observant,” Jack countered. “They could be our eyes and ears inside the school. They know better than to provoke a dangerous ghost,” Jack let his eyes drift over to the portal. “Besides, if the worst comes to pass, I want them to be prepared.”

“I don’t like it but you’re probably right,” Maddie grumbled. “If it keeps them safe then I’d do just about anything.” Jack smiled and leaned forward to kiss her gently, his lips a perfect match for her own.

“And this is why you could never be a bad mother,” he said. “Come on, let’s talk to them before they go to sleep.”

“Or Danny sneaks out again,” Maddie said to herself as she followed her husband up the stairs and heard him call for a Fenton family meeting.

It went about as well as Maddie had expected. Jazz alternated between being angry and anxious, telling them emphatically that Phantom wasn’t hiding among them at school and wasn’t a bad ghost to begin with. Maddie didn’t know what had come over her but she hardly recognized this irrational and emotional young lady as her daughter. She hoped it was just Senior year stress and hormones and not some ghostly influenced. Danny, as usual, sat there like he was a piece of the furniture and didn’t say much at all.

“Danno,” Jack said gently as he interrupted Jazz’s rant to engage their youngest. “You would tell us if you noticed anything unusual with one of your classmates, right? You know we’re telling you kids this because we trust you, love you and want to keep you safe.”

“Have you considered that keeping guns around the house, threatening to hunt and torture ghosts doesn’t make me feel very safe?” Danny said quietly, looking down at the table. “So what if he sometimes goes to school, maybe he wants to have something normal in his life. All I know is that if I was Phantom, maybe I would want to hide too. So people like you didn’t find me.” For the second time that night, the words of a teenage boy stopped her cold.

“Danny, what do you-” Danny didn’t elaborate and instead pushed his chair back and headed towards the door.

“Young Man, where are you going? It’s almost curfew and we’re not done here,” Maddie scolded even though she knew that neither her or Jack were in the control of the situation. Danny opened the door and didn’t look back.

“I won’t be long, just a lap around the block. I just, I just need some air, okay?” The house became quiet, no one quite knowing what to say. Jazz excused herself a moment later and walked back up to her room. She slammed her door shut. The ticking of the clock was the only sound to be heard in the suddenly silent kitchen.

“Is that how he sees us?” Jack asked quietly, looking down at his large hands. “Danny used to think what we did was so cool, when did that change?” When did he change? was the silent, unasked question. Or maybe they'd all changed, grown apart so slowly that no one had really noticed. Maddie stood up abruptly and stalked towards the door, strapping an ectogun to her hip as she went.

“Mads, maybe you should give him-”

“You know as well as I do that this is the peak time for ghosts. Danny, he might not trust us but I won’t let a disagreement get him killed.” It was full dark outside and she was halfway down the block before she realized she didn’t know which direction Danny had gone in. The night air was chill for mid-April as it shook off the last dregs of winter. She was feeling cold in her protective hazmat; Danny had left in short sleeves. Maybe she should run back and get his jacket for when she found him.

“Nice night for a walk,” Maddie jumped at the voice to find Phantom lazily floating in the air above her. His posture was casual but his eyes were sharp, searching as he always was. Green eyes glanced at her gun before meeting her eyes. “Looking for someone? Perhaps chasing someone who doesn’t want to found?” No way was she going to let him know her son was out here, alone and vulnerable.

“You actually,” she lied. He raised a disbelieving eyebrow but didn’t call her out. How could he be so expressive and so hard to read all at once? Against her better judgement, she thought again about the ghost as a human. “You called me Mom earlier, I want to know why.”

“What, you’ve never called someone something dumb by mistake?” Phantom flinched, crossing his arms defensively. “It was an accident, I’m just as upset as you are, believe me. Now if you don’t mind, I was trying to have a nice flight to clear my mind. Good luck finding whoever you were really looking for.”

“My husband thinks you’re pretending to be alive, that you’re lying to the town, going to school.” She searched his face for some sign that she was wrong but his expression was still as stone. “You’re putting people in jeopardy, I thought you wanted to play the hero!”

“I’m not doing anything,” He growled, his eyes flashing ominously in the dark. “I’m just doing the best I can, okay? If I go to the Nasty Burger or sit in on English Poetry when there’s no ghosts to fight then who’s hurt? Only me for trying to hang onto something real, something normal!”

“But the ghosts-”

“News flash! The ghosts would be here with or without me because of your stupid portal! I can’t even legally drive and yet you blame me for everything.” He scoffed and looked away, “you really are just like my mother.”

“So I do remind you of her,” she stated. “Your mother.”

“That’s a great thing to say to some kid you shoot at regularly,” Phantom said, icily, his green gaze boring into her over his shoulder. “What do you want me to say? Yeah, you do. It’s not just your voice or your face but the way you look at me like I’m nothing but a disappointment. How you make me feel like I’m some damaged child you need to hammer into shape.”

“You can’t - I’m not disappointed,” she said before she could think otherwise because how else could she react to such a charged statement? What kind of abusive, miserable home had he come from? Her heart clenched again to be compared to this woman.

“Yeah, I can tell,” Phantom snapped at her sarcastically but, like the time when he’d called her a bad mother, underneath the anger was sadness. “None of this matters, we’re both going to keep doing our own thing without each other’s approval. We’re enemies so let’s just forget this all happened and go back to you shooting at me while I beg for you just stop and listen for one second-”

“Alright, I’m listening!” Maddie shouted back, frustrated and sympathetic against her better judgement. “What is it you want to tell me so bad?” Phantom froze, like he hadn’t expected her to just stop like that. His shoulders hunched and his eyes were wide and he looked so much like a lost teenager that it pulled painfully at her heart. God, why did this one ghost bring out so many contradictory feelings in her?

“I want,” he stopped, swallowed and floated to the ground so they were near eye level. Sometime in the last year, he’d gotten taller than her. She hadn’t realized ghosts could grow, could age. Phantom was always the exception to every rule they had. “I want the same thing you want. I don’t like seeing ghosts coming through and hurting people. Before I was Phantom, I was nobody, I couldn’t help anyone. I can now and keeping people safe, it gives me a purpose I didn’t even have when I was human. Ghosts might just be the untethered remnants of dead people but we still love and feel and value things, just differently than you do. I want to keep ghosts from attacking people but without damaging them, we’re not all evil just... trying to find our own way to the finish line. If you’d just, not attack on sight, I could show you.”

It was perhaps the most she’d heard Phantom say all at once. He was rubbing his gloved fingers anxiously against his thigh and there was a desperate bit of want in his tragically young face. He wanted her to believe him, like a child looking to their mother for approval. As more time stretched on without her speaking, his hopeful look fell into a kind of sad acceptance. He looked like Danny had at the kitchen table not 15 minutes before.

“Okay,” she said finally. “We can give it a try for a bit. It’s not a truce exactly but so long as you’re not causing harm, Jack and I won’t shoot at you.” It wasn’t much but the boy looked like he’d handed her the moon and then some. He floated up a little, his boots jittered with excitement. She gaped when he reached forward and grasped her hand only to shake it enthusiastically. His hand was chilled but solid in her own.

“Yeah, you got a deal! Don’t worry, Mo- Ma’am you won’t have to worry about me, I’ll be a good little ghost, scouts honor! not that I was, uh, ever in the scouts. If things go well, I’d be happy to tell you more about ghosts and the Zone. I’ll even give you a tour if you’d like.” His smile was infectious and she bit her lip to resist the natural urge to smile back.

Maybe Phantom was a ghost, a sad child who’d died far too young but he was also someone’s son. That woman, however, hadn’t been able to protect him, to support him. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to give the ghost boy a chance and maybe Maddie could fill in something his other mother couldn’t. Perhaps she could even learn how to give her own children what they needed too.

“We’ll see,” Maddie hummed. “Now, you were going to go flying and I need to find my son before he catches his death, that is, if he’ll even talk to me.”

“He will,” Phantom said softly. “My mom messed up, hurt me sometimes but I knew she loved me and I love her. I don’t know your son but I do know what it’s like to be a son and your mom is... whether you’re living, dead or in-between, she’s always your mom. Maybe he’s worried you won’t love him, the things he’s done or believes in.” He looked away and rubbed the back of his neck, “Of course, I don’t really know you and your family. Usually try and avoid you guys, being ghost hunters and all. Even your daughter is pretty scary.”

“That would be pretty weird, a ghost surrounded by hunters,” her lips twitched upwards despite herself as she imagined Phantom chatting with Jack and Jazz in the living room. The image wasn’t quite as strange as she’d initially thought. Who knows where this shaky truce would lead them? Phantom took that as his excuse to leave and flew off into the night. Maddie watched him go, she started up the block when she got a series of texts a few minutes later.

Danny: I’m home, sorry for running off like that Danny: I don’t like the way you talk about ghosts the way some people talk about race or gender. I want to make opinions based on facts and understanding, not half baked theories Danny: I’d be willing to talk more, if you’d stop being so stubbornly certain you’re right and just listened for a change Danny: I love you, Mom I don’t think I say that enough. Sometimes I feel scared to, like you won’t understand Danny: Jazz came down and Dad brought out the special fudge Danny: Come home, its cold out

Maddie brought her phone to her lips, looking up in the sky as if she might see Phantom still flying around. That boy still loved his mother, the mother who’d hurt him. She didn’t want to be like Phantom’s mom: distant, cruel, unwilling to listen. If she could hold out an olive branch for her enemy, then she certainly could for her son.

Mom: I love you too, baby, never doubt that. I think I'm ready to listen now. Mom: I’m on my way home, save some fudge for me.

I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, Just around the corner. All is well.

#danny phantom #my writing #this seriously came out of nowhere #it took several twists as it just kind of unfurled underneath me #was halfheartedly searching poems about death when I foung this one #it just jumped out like lightning to me #that even though death and circumstance have seperate Maddie and Danny #they're still connected #still mother and son for good or ill #there's love there and a chance for renewal #idk Im just tired #this has been written for like 3 hours its just taken me this damn long to edit

[lumosandnoxwriting]

Inked Up - Fred Weasley

Title: Inked up Pairing: Fred x Fem!Muggle!TattooArtist!Reader Warnings: NSFW!! Dirty talk, fingering, female receiving oral, unprotected sex, choking. There is also mention of needles!! Summary: Fred never thought he’d get a tattoo. But of course when a pretty girl offers he can’t say no. A/N: Summary is shit but again, what else is new. I had a dream about Fred getting a tattoo and couldn’t stop thinking about it so here you guys go lol. Thank you to everyone who suggested tattoo ideas!! Feedback is always welcome!! Tags: not tagging anyone as I am unsure who is 18+!

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Charlie watches Molly disappear back into the kitchen after dropping off some hot chocolate to everyone in the living room, muttering something about starting to prep the food for tomorrow’s feast. After the war he’s made an effort to come home more often, but it’s been a few months since he’s seen all of his siblings, and he’s made a major upgrade to his body that he’s been dying to show off.

“Finally thought she’d never leave.” Everyone turns to look at Charlie and he gives them a smile. “I wanna show you guys something.”

When Charlie starts to take off his shirt Fred puts his hands up. “Woah there, Char. Do I have to remind you that we’re all related to you?” he jokes. “Although some of us not yet,” he teases, nudging Harry with his foot. He and Ginny got engaged a few months ago and as her older brother Fred has taken it upon himself to tease them both about it every chance he gets.

“Oh, screw off, Fred. I got a tattoo you prat,” Charlie explains as he pulls his shirt off over his head. He turns around so everyone can see the ink on his shoulder blade. It’s a rather amazing portrait of a Hungarian horntail, and they all gasp as its wings start to flap and fire shoots out of its nose. “Sick, right?”

Fred stares at it in awe, watching it move over and over again. He’s never really thought about getting a tattoo or any real body modifications. He watched Katie Bell pierce Alicia Spinnet’s ears with a needle and an ice cube in the common room second year, and that was enough for him to decide that he never wanted to do anything like that to his own body. But now, watching the tattoo on his brother’s back move he can’t help but wonder what a tattoo would look like on his own body.

“Looks wicked, Charlie,” Ginny comments. “Does mum know?”

Charlie shakes his head with a laugh and pulls his shirt back on before turning back to face his siblings. “No, and no one in this room is gonna tell her.”

“I dunno, Charlie. Mum’s been giving me crap about my earring for years, might be nice to not hear about it for a while,” Bill teases.

Charlie throws a pillow at Bill, and everyone gets back to what they were doing before Charlie’s announcement, except for Fred, who’s still thinking about the tattoo on his brother’s back.

-

Like most decisions in Fred’s life, his decision to get a tattoo is impulsive. He’s been thinking about getting a tattoo since Charlie showed his off on Christmas Eve, so when he’s heading back towards Diagon Alley with coffee for him and George it seems natural for him to take a detour into a tattoo shop. Six months is a fairly long time to think about something and he doesn’t seem the harm in just merely looking around.

“Hi, can I help you with something?”

Fred pulls his attention away from the art that litters the walls of the small space towards the counter in front of him. He’d been so mesmerized by the atmosphere that he didn’t even notice the young woman standing just a few feet away. But now that he has, he can’t seem to look away.

She is by far the most beautiful woman Fred has ever seen. Her long hair cascades down her back and there’s light reflecting off of the small diamond of her nose piercing. The variety of simple, black line art tattoos that crawl up her left arm stand out on her skin, and Fred let’s his eyes trace over them for a moment. He lets his eyes trail back up to hers and he gives her his signature smirk.

“I’ve been thinking about getting a tattoo, actually,” Fred explains, stepping up to the counter. He rests his hands on the counter and leans on them, and Fred watches as the young women’s eyes trace the muscles and veins of his forearms.

“Well you’ve come to the right place,” the young woman responds as her eyes meet Fred’s once again. There’s a fresh pink tint to her cheeks and it makes Fred’s heart beat faster in his chest. “Do you have any idea of what you’d want to get?”

“I’ve got a few, I think. I dunno, I don’t want to pick the wrong thing and end up with something I hate on my body for the rest of my life, ya know?” he chuckles.

“That’s part of the thrill isn’t it?” she asks. Her eyes are bright with mischief, and Fred can feel himself swooning. “I’ve got a fair few tattoos that I picked out just a few minutes before my appointment. Sometimes life shouldn’t be taken so seriously. And if you really hate something you can always get it covered up later.”

Fred lets his eyes trace some of her tattoos again while he waits for his heart rate to calm down. He’s already become enamored by this woman and he doesn’t even know her name. “Well you’ve convinced me then. D’you have any suggestions? Being an expert and all,” he flirts.

The flush on the woman’s cheeks deepens and Fred practically drools when she pulls her plump bottom lip between her teeth as she thinks. “Well since you’re a virgin, a tattoo virgin,” she clarifies when Fred snickers. “I’d recommend something simple and meaningful. That way if you realize tattoos aren’t for you at least the one you have means something. And if tattoos are for you, the boring one is already out of the way and your next one can be something fun.”

“Like a meaningful date, something like that?” Fred asks, a few different ideas swimming around in his mind.

“As long as it’s not an anniversary with a girlfriend. I can’t tell you how many of those I’ve had to cover up,” the young woman laughs.

“No girlfriend, so no worries there,” Fred responds, unable to miss the excited look that crosses the woman’s face. “I’m Fred, by the way.”

The woman holds out her hand, a shiver running down her spine when Fred grabs it. “I’m Y/N.” After their handshake the linger with their hands clasped together, both a little reluctant to let go.

-

Fred makes an appointment for a tattoo that evening, and by the time he stops at Gringotts to grab some muggle money and heads into the joke shop both the coffees in his hand have gone cold.

“Took you long enough, git. Did you get lost?” George teases, using his wand to rewarm both of their drinks. One Saturday a month they keep the shop closed and use the opportunity to rearrange the shelves, inventory the products so they can put orders into their suppliers and make up new displays. They never want the store to seem boring or stagnant, and this one day a month allows them to keep things interesting.

“I had to make a few stops on the way,” Fred explains, starting to dig through a box of whizbangs.

“Okay mister secretive,” George huffs. “You finally get a girlfriend you haven’t told me about?”

Fred doesn’t look up from what he’s doing, knowing the flush on his cheeks will only cause George to tease him further. “You’re an idiot.” He had planned on keeping his tattoo a secret for a bit, something just for him. But there are few things in the world Fred keeps from George. “I’m gonna get a tattoo.”

“Oh?” George asks in surprise. “You’ve never talked about it before.”

Fred shrugs. “Just been thinking about it, for a bit. Since Charlie showed us his at Christmas. I never thought it’d be something for me but, it seemed cool. I noticed a shop on my way back and popped in. Just to see what it was about. But I started talking to the girl in there-“

“Ah,” George says in realization, cutting Fred off. “A pretty girl convinced you to get one. I see, I see,” he teases.

Fred looks up at George this time and whips a whizbang box at his head. “I didn’t say she was pretty.”

“That blush on your cheeks does though,” George responds with a chuckle.

“You’re an asshat.”

George rolls his eyes. “So, what did the pretty girl say that made you get a tattoo?”

George seems genuinely interested, so Fred chooses to ignore the teasing tone he has. “That life isn’t so serious.”

“That’s it? This woman must be drop dead gorgeous if that’s all it took for you to decide to put something on your body forever.”

“I mean that wasn’t what she said verbatim. And it sounded better when she said it,” Fred insists, throwing another whizbang box at George. He cheers when it hits his brother in the chest and he ducks his head when George whips it right back at him. “And even though it’s none of your business and it had no bearing on my decision, she was hot as hell.”

-

When Fred returns to the shop that night his knees are shaking slightly, and he has butterflies in his stomach. He’s excited and scared at the same time, but all around ready for this new experience. Y/N is already waiting for him at the counter when he steps in the shop, and the warm smile she shoots him does wonders to calm his nerves.

“Long time no see,” he greets smoothly, coming up to stand in front of the counter again.

“Sorry who are you again?” she teases with a wink. Y/N has been looking forward to Fred’s return since the moment the shop door shut behind him. It’s rare someone as handsome and charming as Fred walks into the shop, and the chemistry between them had been too heavy to deny. Y/N’s one major rule is to refrain from sleeping with her clients, but one look at Fred’s muscles bulging in his thin t-shirt had her ready to jump over the counter and into his strong arms.

Fred gasps and places a hand on his chest, feigning hurt. “Am I really that unforgettable?”

“There are many words I would use to describe you, Fred. And unforgettable is not one of them,” she responds, making her voice as sultry as possible.

Fred had a feeling Y/N had been attracted to him when he came into the shop earlier, but her confirmation leaves a warm feeling in his chest. He hasn’t stopped thinking about her since this morning and he hopes he leaves this appointment with more than just a tattoo. “Really? Care to share a few?”

“I care to share more than a few things with you, Fred. But we’ve got other things to attend to first.” Y/N bites her lip, letting her eyes rake up and down Fred’s body for a moment, before motioning for him to follow her. She leads Fred over to her station where she’d already started to get things set up. “Here’s the stencil I drew up, it’s pretty simple so I can always add more if you want.”

Fred takes the piece of paper from Y/N, letting his finger graze the back of her hand for a moment. “It’s perfect, Y/N.”

Y/N smiles at Fred taking the stencil back from him. “Great. Where do you want it to go?”

Fred bites his lip and he makes direct eye contact with Y/N as he pulls his shirt off over his head. He watches her eyes drop down to his torso for a moment and he tenses his ab muscles for a moment. “I was thinking right here,” he starts, grabbing Y/N’s attention again. He gestures to the area under his right pec. “The uh, what’s this called? Under boob area?” he chuckles.

“The pec?” she asks with a laugh, unable to keep her eyes from wandering down to Fred’s bare torso. Apart from a few random scars his skin is milky white and perfect. Obviously he takes care of his body, and Y/N can tell his muscles are hard and toned. She wants to dig her nails into his flesh, but she’ll settle with digging her tattoo needle into it first.

“The pec, right. That’s what it’s called.” As Y/N prepares to put the stencil on his skin Fred lets himself admire her. The skirt she’s wearing is short, and it exposes half of a large tattoo on her right thigh. Fred is imagining what it would feel like to sink his teeth into it, when Y/N is touching his chest lightly.

“There,” she says as she finishes putting the stencil on. “Go check it out in the mirror and see what you think. I can make it bigger or smaller if you want and we can change the placement up too.”

Fred watches as Y/N turns around to do something at her station, his eyes focused on the way the fabric of her skirt clings to her ass. When Y/N turns around and catches him looking he smirks. “Oh, was I supposed to be checking out the tattoo? My mistake.” Fred winks at her before turning towards the mirror and examining how the stencil looks on his skin.

“Look good?” Y/N asks when Fred turns back around. She sits down in her chair and motions for Fred to lay back on the table.

“Looks perfect,” Fred confirms. He feels his nerves start to return ss he climbs up on the table and lays back. He watches as Y/N pulls on a pair of gloves and smiles at her when she looks down at him. “You do have your license to do this, right? Probably should have asked that before we got this far.”

Y/N laughs. “You’re in safe hands, Fred. I promise.” She grabs her gun and turns it on before gently dips the needle into the maroon ink Fred had picked out earlier. “Let me know if you need a break or the pain is too intense, okay?”

“Roger that.” The hum of the gun is somewhat soothing to Fred and he takes a deep breath, slowly releasing it as Y/N presses the gun to the first line. “Oh,” he breathes, eyes wide. “Not as bad as I thought it would be.”

Y/N chuckles as she starts to trace the stencil, pausing for a moment to collect some more ink. “Told ya you were in safe hands.” She continues to ink Fred’s skin for a moment, trying not to pay attention to how close they are. “So why this date? You said you don’t have a girlfriend but it’s far too recent to be your birthday, unless you’re a very mature three-year-old.” she asks, trying to distract herself from how bad she wants to climb on top of him.

Fred holds in his laugh until Y/N has pulled the gun away from his skin. “It’s uh, the day that I almost died, actually,” he mumbles, wiping his sweaty palms off on his jeans. It’s been just over three years since the Battle of Hogwarts, and even though Fred’s nightmares about that night have long since stopped talking about it never fails to make him emotional.

“Oh,” Y/N says softly, starting to trace the numbers once again. “That’s um. Sorry, I’m not sure what to say. I really wasn’t expecting you to say that.”

“It’s okay. That’s what all the scars are from, actually. Freak accident, a stone wall collapsed on top of me.” For a moment Fred is actually glad that he can lie to Y/N about his brush with death. Hearing that he was nearly murdered during the final battle of a war against a dark wizard is far more terrifying. “I felt powerless for a long time after it happened, which is why I wanted to get this tattoo. Take back some of the power I lost.”

“Wow, Fred. That’s really beautiful.” Y/N undeniably feels attracted to Fred, and she’s starting to realize it goes far deeper than just wanting him in her bed. He’s charismatic and charming, but there’s sincerity and softness in there too. “I got a rose for my first tattoo because it’s my Mum’s name and I figured it would make her less angry.”

Fred chuckles, thankful for Y/N’s distraction. “Did it work?”

“Not at all,” Y/N reveals. “She didn’t talk to me, for weeks. She’s okay with it now, especially since it’s my career. But yeah she was pretty pissed for a long time.”

“And that’s exactly why I don’t plan on ever telling my Mum. My older brother pierced his ear years ago and she still gives him crap about it even though he’s married with a kid now. I will never hear the end of it if she finds out about this.”

“Guess this will have to be our dirty little secret,” Y/N teases with a wink.

“As long as it’s not the only dirty think between us,” Fred fires back, smirking when her cheeks flush pink.

Y/N rolls her eyes to try and downplay how turned on she is. “Keep it in your pants a little bit longer, Fred. We’re almost done here.”

“As long as you promise to help me take it out of my pants later on,” Fred suggests with a wink.

“You’re one cheeky bastard. Has anyone ever told you that?” Y/N asks as she finishes up the tattoo. She turns her gun off and puts it down, before grabbing a paper towel to wipe off the access ink.

“Many times, though it sounds much better coming from your mouth.” Fred sits up slowly, and heads over to the mirror to examine the tattoo. The ink is the same color as his old Gryffindor Quidditch Robes and the font is simple, but Fred is completely enamored by it. His eyes trace over the numbers over and over again, like they might disappear if he looks away.

“You like it?” Y/N asks, watching Fred as she cleans her station up.

Fred turns to look at Y/N, a huge smile on his face. “It’s absolutely perfect. You did an amazing job.”

“Thank you, Fred.” Y/N feels like she’s on cloud 9, and she slowly approaches Fred so she can finish up the appointment. “Now you’ll need to wash it a few times a day with unscented soap and pat it dry with a paper towel and apply some ointment to it as well. As it heals it’ll itch like crazy but try your hardest not to scratch it. You should wear a loose shirt for the first few days, so the tattoo doesn’t stick to it.” Y/N places a piece of clingfilm on Fred’s chest, subtly feeling his hard muscles as she smoothes it out. “You have to leave this on for a few hours. Sound good?” Y/N looks up at Fred then, letting out a small gasp at how intense his gaze is.

“Sounds perfect.” As Y/N starts to pull her hands away Fred grabs them in his and brings her into his chest. He intertwines their fingers with one hand, while the other comes up to cup her cheek. “Can I kiss you?” When Y/N nods weakly Fred leans down and presses their lips together in a slow kiss.

As they kiss it starts to turn desperate and Y/N whines as Fred’s hands start to shove up the back of her shirt. “As much as I would love to fuck you right here we’d be breaking about 20 different health code violations,” Y/N pants as Fred starts to trail kisses down her neck. “There’s a staircase, in the back. It leads up to my flat. I need to fuck,” her sentence cuts off with a moan as Fred starts to suck a mark into her skin.

“I need to fuck too,” Fred jokes, pulling away from her slightly. “I’ll wait for you upstairs while you do whatever you need to down here, yeah?” Fred kisses Y/N again briefly before forcing himself away. He grabs his t-shirt and looks over his shoulder at Y/N one last time before he heads off towards her flat.

“Fucking finally,” Y/N groans a few minutes later when she’s joining Fred. She pushes him up against her front door, one of her hands grabbing his neck to pull him into a kiss, while the other goes to his crotch and palms his hardening erection through his trousers. “You have no idea how hard it was for me to not jump on you the second you laid back on that table.”

Fred moans as Y/N grips him through his trousers, her lips biting at the sensitive skin on his neck. “Do you have any idea how unbelievably sexy I find you? The second I saw you I wanted to bend you over that fucking counter and ruin you.” Fred brings their lips together again in a hot kiss as Y/N opens the door and shoves Fred into her flat.

Y/N lives in a small studio, so it’s easy for her to guide Fred over to her bed while they kiss. She pushes him back onto her bed and kicks off her shoes before climbing back over him. “Fuck I so wish you had, Fred. I spent all day thinking about your hands and your stupid arm muscles.”

“Let me show you what I can do with these hands then, princess.” Fred kicks off his shoes before flipping them over. He starts to press open mouthed kisses to the column of Y/N’s throat as his hands move under her shirt and up her torso. His hands cup her breasts, and when his thumbs rub over Y/N’s nipples he lets out a surprised gasp. “Holy fucking shit that’s hot. Take your shirt off.”

Y/N laughs as she sits up enough to pull her shirt off over her head. She tosses it away and as soon as her back is against the bed again, Fred’s hands are cupping and massaging her breasts. He’s watching her intensely and it sends a shiver down her spine. Y/N lets out a low moan as Fred’s thumbs start to toy with the silver barbells in her nipples.

Fred leans down and takes one of her nipples into his mouth, moaning when the cool metal touches his warm tongue. The tip of the tongue joys with the jewelry for a few moments before Fred’s teeth nibble at the sensitive bud. Y/N’s moans spur him on, and he starts to grind his erection against her thigh. “You are so fucking sexy, Y/N.”

“More, Fred, please,” Y/N pants. Fred’s every manipulation on her breasts is sending shocks of pleasure right to her aching core, and Y/N is desperate for more. “Show me what else your hands can do.”

Fred reluctantly gets off of the bed to rid himself of the rest of his clothes, motioning for Y/N to do the same. “Can’t wait to bury my fingers in you,” Fred growls as he settles back in between Y/N’s legs. He bends Y/N’s knees and pushes her thighs back as far as they’ll go so she’s completely spread open for him. He starts to slowly trail his fingers up her thigh watching as goosebumps erupt in their wake. “Such a pretty pussy you have, princess. And so wet too.” Fred’s thumb starts to slowly rub through Y/N’s folds, his eyes watching Y/N’s face. “This all for me, princess?”

Y/N moans as Fred’s thumb starts to slowly rub circles on her clit. “All for you Fred, fuck. Need more, please.”

“Need what?” he teases, his index finger slowly starting to trace her dripping entrance. “Need my fingers to fuck your desperate cunt?”

“Fred,” Y/N moans as he finally sinks his index finger into her. She starts to toy with her nipples as he adds another finger, slowly curling them as he pumps them in and out of her.

“Such a tight cunt, princess,” Fred coos. He watches as Y/N writhes underneath him, mesmerized by the way her teeth tug at her bottom lip. “My cock might split you in two if I try and fuck you.” Y/N lets out a low moan at that and Fred smirks. “You like that, princess? You want my cock to split you open?”

Y/N nods, too busy panting and moaning to actually answer Fred. His fingers are hitting her g-spot with every thrust and his thumb is rubbing hard circles on her clit. Arousal is building in her stomach at a rapid pace, and just the thought of Fred splitting her open on his cock nearly pushes her over the edge.

“Come on my fingers first, princess. Then I’m gonna fuck you so hard you forget your name.” Fred focuses on bringing Y/N to her climax then, quickening the speed at which his fingers are fucking into her. He replaces the thumb that’s rubbing at her clit with his mouth, immediately sucking the sensitive bud between his lips and nibbling on it gently.

“Oh fuck, Freddie,” Y/N moans as she hits her climax, her legs shutting from the pleasure, trapping Fred’s head between her thighs. He starts to moan around her clit, sending extra shockwaves of pleasure through Y/N’s body. Her back arches as another mini orgasm rips through her body, her hips grinding down onto Fred’s face. “Oh my god,” Y/N gasps as she starts to come down, her legs relaxing so Fred can sit up.

“Such a good girl princess,” he praises, bringing the fingers that had been in Y/N up to her mouth. She immediately brings them between her lips and sucks, letting her tongue wrap around them as she tastes herself on the digits. Fred’s cock twitches as he imagines her mouth wrapped around something else, and he has to pull his fingers away to keep from coming at the sight. “You taste so good, don’t you princess?”

Y/N hums in confirmation, and she reaches up to grab Fred, pulling him down into a kiss. She lets her tongue roam around his mouth, moaning into it. “Fuck me Fred, please. Need you now.”

Fred grabs one of Y/N’s legs and hitches it over his shoulder, gripping the base of his cock to line up with her entrance. Her folds are glistening, and he can’t resist letting the tip of his cock run through them. “Such a warm cunt, princess. Gonna make my cock feel so good.” Fred starts to slowly push his hips forward not stopping until his hips are pushed flush to Y/N’s. “Oh my fuck, princess. Such a tight little pussy you have. Gripping my cock so well.”

“Move Fred, please,” Y/N begs, her own hips starting to buck up in search of friction. “Fuck me hard, please. Want you to ruin me.”

Fred leans over Y/N and braces himself on one of his hands, starting to pound into her relentlessly. “Not gonna touch your clit, princess,” Fred grunts as he lands a hard thrust. “Wanna see if I can get you to come from just my cock.”

Y/N moans and grips Fred’s shoulders with her hands to avoid touching herself. Fred is fucking into her deeply, and the head of his cock is rubbing her g-spot with every movement. “Stretching me out so good, Freddie,” Y/N groans. “Feel so full. Love being full of your cock.”

Fred leans down to peck Y/N’s lips several times before his head dips down to briefly toy with her nipple. “Fuck, princess. Making such pretty noises for me.” Y/N’s mouth is hanging open, a mixture of moans, pants and whines leaving her lips. “Can I try something, princess? Let me know if you don’t like it okay?”

“I trust you, Fred.”

Fred wraps the hand he isn’t supporting himself on around Y/N’s throat, just barely applying pressure to the sides. He groans as her walls tighten around his cock, applying just a bit more pressure. “This okay, princess? Need to hear your words.”

“Yes, Fred,” Y/N gasps. “Choke me harder.” When Fred applies more pressure Y/N’s eyes roll to the back of her head, her walls clenching and twitching around Fred as she suddenly hits her climax.

“Such a good girl, princess. So good for me,” Fred praises, releasing Y/N’s throat so she can breathe normally as she comes down from her orgasm. “Gonna come, princess. Can I fill you up? Wanna be full of my come?”

Y/N nods, clenching around Fred to help him reach his climax. “Fill me up Fred, please. Wanna feel your cum dripping down my thighs.”

That does it for Fred, and his hips stutter as he starts to shoot his load deep inside of Y/N. He rolls his hips slowly as he comes down, only pulling out when his cock has finished twitching. He stays between Y/N’s legs for a moment, watching her folds flutter as some of his release starts to drip out of her and down onto the bed. He collapses on the bed next to Y/N and opens an arm for her to cuddle into his chest.

“Fuck that was hot,” she giggles, pressing a few kisses to Fred’s sweaty skin. One of her arms winds around his waist, squeezing slightly. “You can stay the night. If you want. No pressure or anything,” she rambles, embarrassment washing over her.

Fred tilts her chin up, leaning down to press a sweet kiss to her lips. “Darling, not even a fire would get me up out of this bed away from you.”

-

When Fred wakes up in the morning Y/N is still asleep, cuddled up under the blanket with his t-shirt on. He presses a soft kiss to her forehead before getting out of bed and stumbling to the bathroom. Before they passed out, Y/N had shown him how to properly take care of his tattoo and he starts to repeat the process. Once it’s clean and he’s applied a thin layer of ointment, Fred just let’s his finger trace over the fresh ink, watching himself in the mirror.

“So? Do you regret it?” Y/N asks, leaning against the doorway to the bathroom.

Fred turns to look at her, crossing his arms over his chest. “The tattoo? Or the sex?”

Y/N ponders his questions for a moment. “Both.”

“No to both,” Fred answers honestly. He opens his arms, and Y/N immediately presses herself against his front, winding her arms around his middle. Fred grips her waist with one hand, while the other starts to gently rub her back.

“When do you think you’ll want more?” Y/N asks, looking up at Fred.

“Tattoos? Or sex?” he asks with a grin.

“Both,” Y/N repeats.

Fred bites his lip. “Tattoo maybe in a few weeks, once this one is healed up. But the sex? I’d say right now.” He leans down to press a kiss to Y/N’s mouth, slowly walking them back over to her bed.

#fred weasley #Fred Weasley smut #fw #golden

[theepisceswriter]

Can I request a fic of Connie Springer and a black female reader? The idea I had is that the reader was almost killed during a mission, so Connie makes passionate love to her. So nsfw lol

YEARNING FOR YOUR TOUCH 

TW: mature things obviously, mentions of death, a lot of angst in the beginning, typos probably because I didn’t proofread, 18+, MINORS DNI

WC: 2.5k

Connie’s whole body had been numb with shock for the last hour. He couldn’t even recall the last time he had moved his body an inch out of its original position since sitting down in the empty room nor could he even remember the last time his eyelids drooped down to blink. He couldn’t let them out of fear that the action would allow the tears accumulating in the back of his mind to fall the moment his eyelashes lifted from his cheeks and crying would only bring the whole reality of this situation clashing down on to him at once. Forcing him to accept the fact that you were indeed gone; that he couldn’t twirl your tight knit curls around his fingers to fall asleep like he always did when laying next to you in bed or see the sparkling glimmer of sunlight against your rich brown skin whenever you traded in your scout uniform for regular clothes, always eager to compliment you on how you looked like the gods had personally come down and kissed your skin. His whole body ached terribly for yours, for the warmth of your body heat and the sweet smell of oils and hair products that infiltrated his nostrils whenever he pulled you in for a hug. 

The thought of him never being able to do that again, when he did so everyday, wasn’t clicking in his head and his darling dearest being gone off the face of this earth never will sit right with him.

His memories of hours ago were still one big blur in his head because honestly, a big part of him didn’t want to remember the dread he felt in those moments. All he remembers is debris and a thick coating of dust clouding his vision as he did his best to search for you, passing other scouts stuck under large chunks of debris being moved by other team members hoping you weren’t in the same predicament as them. That hope was diminished greatly when he finally met up with the main team after not being able to find you on his own. He expected to see you standing there right alongside Jean, leaned up against him cracking a couple of jokes to ease the pain that always came post-battle, but the sunken expression his comrade wore on his features made his heart drop to his stomach alone.

“We couldn’t find her, Connie. We looked everywhere for y/n, but she most likely was covered completely by some large pieces of debris...Sorry Connie.”

Maybe they had Levi be the one to tell him because of his always monotonous tone, neither dreadful or happy, thinking the delivery would hurt him less, but each word still sent a painful dagger through his heart that left his chest burning with an indescribable pain. He couldn’t understand why things like this kept happening to him and even if he got an answer from the gods above themselves, none of this still wouldn’t make any sense. Especially not them taking you away from him. His one and only, his reason for fighting as hard as he did, his motivation; his everything. He wouldn’t even be able to give you the proper burial that you deserved, how was he going to recover from this?

It wasn’t even the sound of the door creaking open that brought him out of his sorrow thoughts, but the artificial light that peeked through that finally brought him to his senses. He wasn’t in the mood to socialize with anyone right now nor did he have time for their pity checkups on him. There was no telling what direction his emotions might go in if they kept prodding at him, so he was quick to open up his mouth to give whoever was at the door a verbal warning: 

“Get lost. I’m not in the fucking mood to be dealing with anyone and their bullshit right now.” He harshly spat out, not even caring who it was that he was speaking these words to. Surely they would understand and he would apologize eventually when he got a hold of his emotions.

“I never knew you had such a potty mouth on you, Connie.”

It couldn’t be. This wasn’t possible. He had to have been hallucinating the sound of your voice, his grief playing some sick trick on his mind. He couldn’t even turn around to confirm if it was you or not, frozen in place with a variety of feelings overriding his system. He had been through so much in the last couple of hours, this had to be some trauma defense mechanism his brain was creating to protect him from the reality of all of this, right? 

But it was the soft touch of your hand on his shoulder, a warmth and familiarity he’d recognize from anywhere, that brings him out of his state of denial. There are no words exchanged between you two when he turns around, brown eyes wide with an emotion you couldn’t quite read as his arms pulled you in for a tight embrace. His lips leaving kisses all over the bed of curls that covered the top of your head that he was reminiscing about only moments ago before he’s placing his lips on yours. There’s nowhere else he’d rather be right now. 

“I missed you, I missed you, I missed you.” Is the only phrase that leaves his lips continuously as he takes you in, your form, your scent, your whole being. It’s when he pulls away that he notices the streak of tears that wets your cheeks, thumb coming up to caress your cheek and wipe them away.

“Don’t cry, y/n. You’re going to make me cry.” He whispers in a barely audible voice with a chuckle, doing his best to still hold back his tears that he had been holding back since earlier. 

“I love you.” You manage to muster up through ragged breaths like the two of you were back in scout training as teenagers with growing pains and it was the first time you were saying it to him. 

“I love you way more than you’ll ever know.” He replies in an instant, letting the lips that hovered over yours finally make contact for a kiss that was a lot more passionate than the first. He wastes no time in letting his tongue lace together with yours letting you know exactly what direction this was going to go the moment you felt his chilled hands on your back working to remove the intricate design of the scout’s uniform off of your body. He’d ask questions on how you escaped an untimely death later, right now all he wanted was you and the warmth of your skin against his. He craved everything about you and he was about to fulfill that craving. 

In no time he had the black fabric falling down and exposing your bare shoulders and before he moved you to the janky bed placed in the middle of the room you kicked the door you had entered through closed with the heel of your foot.

“You have no idea how scared I was that I was going to lose you, y/n.” Connie spoke up as he pushed you down onto the flimsy mattress of the bed, hands hurrying to remove the fabric that was keeping him from seeing your body in all of its glory. And once he finally did get it off, discarding the uniform to some random corner of the room, he couldn’t help but do a double take, eyes lingering on each part of your body like your undergarments still weren’t on and like this was the first time he was ever seeing your body at all. Like the two of you hadn’t fooled around in the showers in the living quarters only two days ago, but considering all the two of you had been through, two days ago felt like 2 years ago. 

“I’ll never leave your side again, Connie. You’ll never have to worry about me again I can pro-”

“I think I’d miss your soft breasts the most.” The feeling of the buzzcut comrade’s warm mouth engulfing your brown areolas and gently flicking his tongue over the hardening bud that was your nipple cut your sentence off prematurely, not even noticing that he had pulled your undershirt down to the point where both of your breasts were exposed and spilling over the top. With a plop he pulled away and gave the next nipple the same treatment, tongue swirling over it in a way that turned the butterflies in your stomach into moths. It didn’t take long at all for him to pull away from them completely and begin to trail kisses down your stomach.

“I always did like rubbing your stomach and tracing over your stretch marks too. I go crazy everytime I see them peek through whenever you reach up to grab something high.” Compliment after compliment was mumbled into your soft brown skin. His hands moved to your thighs to spread them open, softly kneading at the thick flesh while profanities slipped from underneath his breath in amazement. There wasn’t a body on this earth that compared to yours in his eyes. Even as he was dying to place his head in between your thighs and bury his face in your pussy while he devoured it like it was his last meal, he decided to take his sweet time to make this experience more sensual and passionate with a side of pain for the both of you as he drug this out. 

“Connie, please.” You whimpered out in an attempt to get him moving. “I need you so bad right now.”

Little kisses were littered from you ankles up to the inside of your thighs until finally he spread them apart with his hands. Just the sight alone of your pussy dripping with arousal all because of him could get him off alone.

“God, you’re soaking wet just for me baby, hm? Of course you are, you in all of your entirety belong to me.” Nimble fingers dig into your folds to collect your slick, travelling it back up to your clit and working it in with his index and middle fingers with clockwork motions. Enjoying the way you squirm underneath him. He gave you no warning at all before he was removing those two fingers from your clit only to plunge them inside your hole while his mouth immediately went to your protruding clit, sucking and licking at the sensitive bud fast enough to accumulate some spit that made the process to your orgasm all the more messier just how he liked. His face flushed against your aching clit that was practically welcoming him back home, your hips bucking up and grinding up into his face for added pleasure that left you a whimpering splayed out mess against the sheets of the bed. His fingers moved in a fast curled motion that had your eyes rolling to the back of your head and with the mixed pleasure of his tongue and spit abusing your poor clit, it wasn’t long at all before you were gushing all over his fingers and mouth. 

“Oh fuck, Connie!” You yelled out at the height of your orgasm, him only humming in response against you as he picked up his movements to help you ride out the much needed orgasm.

“I don't know what I would do without the taste of your sweet pussy in my mouth, I never tasted anything better.” He continued on with his compliments as he pulled away from your cunt, face glistening with your orgasm and your juices dripping down his chin, but he didn’t mind at all and the image was surely going to be added to your spank bank for future references. 

“What else do you want, baby girl?” Connie asks as he positions himself so he’s now hoovering over you, fingers gently stroking your oversensitive clit as he awaits your answer. 

“You. I want all of you.” You reply even though there was no need for a verbal reply because the moment the question left his lips you were already helping him out of his uniform as quickly as possibly. As soon as it was off of him he repositioned himself between your legs, thick erect cock in his hand as he guided it to your already slick hole, teasingly rubbing his tip up and down your slit before entering you with ease due to your previous preparement. No matter how many times the two of you fooled around with one another, you were always shocked with just how full he always made you feel, like his cock was made specifically to fit inside of you and he’d agree completely if you ever told him this out loud. 

Your arms wrap around his bare back to pull him down closer to you as he delivers gentle sensual thrusts into your cunt that has you feeling every inch and curve of him. Soft murmurs of ‘I love you’s leaving both of your lips in between broken moans. You’ve never felt so at home then how you’ve felt in this moment; your lover’s arms wrapped around your torso and vice versa as he made the sweetest love to you that had your toes curling against the thin sheets of the bed. No one worked your body as good as he did and this session proved just that, pants leaving your lips and your eyes rolling to the back of your head with each thrust. He was your heaven on earth.

“I’ll always protect you from now on.” He spoke up between pants as he sped up the movements of his hips, feeling the two of you rapidly begin to reach your orgasms yet again. It was the clenching of your walls around him and throbbing of his tip each time it grazed over your sweet spot that gave it away. He knew your orgasm was approaching fast, and he wanted to give you what you needed. Connie used one of his hands to slide between your bodies to rub fast circles on your clit. His gesture sent multiple jolts of pleasure through your core, helping you archive your second orgasm. Your grip on him tightened as you reached your peak, your pussy clamping down on him and you whispered his name through moans of pleasure.

“Come on, baby. Cum for me please, cum inside of me Connie.”

It was those words leaving your lips that egged him on and sped up the pace of his thrusting until his own orgasm snuck up on him and had his whole body shuddering against yours, thick long warm webs of cum shooting up inside of you. Immediately after achieving his high he broke down on your chest, all the tears and emotions he had been holding back all day finally coming into play. 

“Please, please, please never leave me again y/n,” He sobbed out against your chest to the point where it began to dampen from tears. The arms he had around your torso tightening dearly around you as he held you close for comfort.

“I won’t ever leave you again. I promise.” You assured him as you ran your fingers through the short cut of his hair, holding him in your arms as you allowed him to get all those emotions out.

#i hope you enjoy babes! #I switched it up a little bit to make him think that reader did indeed die for a little bit #and yes I had to take a break and cry bc I kept using Sasha's death as a reference scene for this #Asks. #aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #aot smut #attack on titan fanfiction #attack on titan smut #connie springer x reader #connie springer smut #connie springer x black reader #anime x black reader #attack on titan x black reader #connie springer #attack on titan

[trivia-bangtan]

after - jjk (011)

pairing: patient!oc x patient!jungkook

genre: friends to lovers au, kinda a hazel and gus trope, lots of angst, fluff and suggestive themes

warning: not much lol just sadness

authors note: sorry it’s been so long 😔 work has been killing me and i just finished moving sooooo yeah lol but enjoy my loves and as always stay safe 🥰🥰

i couldn’t bring myself to wake up. i had been awake for a week now but i refused to open my eyes.

“he’s gone,” mijoo, my nurse, states. okay, so maybe i refused to open my eyes… for jungkook.

when they had told me he was the one who saved me, i was so embarrassed. how could i look him in the eye after that?

how could i have let her overpower me so easily like that?

i was more so angry at myself because of how weak i was. i can’t believe i really allowed myself to cave like that.

there was also something else that prevented me from really opening my eyes and speaking to him.

“i love you, please don’t leave me.”

he loves me. he loves me. he loves me.

no matter how many times i repeat it in my head, it still doesn’t sound real. he told me loved me after seeing me at my lowest. i wanted to combust from happiness and embarrassment all at once. someone like jungkook really loves me. i don’t think i could ever get tired of hearing or saying it.

“you know, you’re going to have to talk to him eventually,” mijoo says pointedly, checking my vitals.

“what do you i even start with? ‘sorry you had to rescue me don’t worry about the concussion by the way. oh, i love you too’. yeah, cause that doesn’t sound mental,” i scoff.

when i had woken up a week ago, mijoo was changing out my iv bags. i begged her not to say anything yet, only to the doctor. i wanted time to process that i put myself in this position again. she agreed, staying by my side the entire time. but a week had came and gone and jungkook was as stubborn as stubborn comes. he would come at the start of visiting hours and leave once they ended. it was such a regular thing that the nurses at the desk greeted him by name and would chat with him. i knew i would have to eventually come clean and speak to him but i didn’t want to do so while i was still trying to understand why he loved me.

maybe it was a spur of the moment kind of thing? ya know, something you say when someone is dying. or maybe he didn’t mean it at all and was just speaking out of his ass? what if he did mean it? i couldn’t figure out what scared me more: him lying or him meaning it.

“you could start by asking him how he’s been,” mijoo chides, continuing with her daily task.

“what do you mean?” i ask, slightly nervous to her underlying tone.

“he’s looking sicker and sicker everyday,” she sighs, placing the IV bag back on its hook. it broke my heart. despite everything, i had forgotten about his illness. not intentionally, of course, but because he never acted sick so i was never aware of how bad it was actually getting. it was easy to pretend like the bad never existed when you shroud yourself into your own cloud of selfishness.

“is his treatment not working?” i asked, curious about his progress since i’ve been to selfish to ask him myself.

“you know i can’t disclose patient information. besides, this will give you an opportunity to talk to him and ask him yourself,” mijoo smirks, discarding her gloves in the bin.

“don’t act like hipaa is the real reason you’re doing this,” i scowl, folding my arms over my chest and leaning into my seat. she chuckles and shakes her head, heading out of the room.

“talk to him. it might do you both some good,” mijoo says before heading out of the room for good, shutting the door behind her. i scoff at the door and rolled my eyes. i knew she was right. but it was taking everything in me to continue to find reasons not to talk to him. but it was getting harder and harder because i did miss him more than i cared to admit.

when the next day rolled around, i made a decision. i had to see him for myself. the curiosity was killing me on what he looked like. it has been nearly a month since we last looked at each other. and i mean really looked at each other.

i woke up extra early and waited for him to arrive. my heartbeat matched the beat of the ticking seconds on the clock. it was like time was slowly inching closer to it’s desired time and i could feel, hear and smell everything within each passing second. i knew why i was so nervous, but it still didn’t help. i waited anxiously for the time to reach 8 AM and when it did, i could hear him down the hall, animatedly speaking to the nurses at the check-in counter. he stood there speaking to them for quite some time, as he normally does, before making his way over to my room. i tried to relax my body the best i could but nothing in the world could relax me for this moment of truth.

and nothing could relax me for the moment our eyes met.

the door swung open slowly, as if he were trying his best not to disturb me. but the minute his eyes looked up from the ground, he froze. his eyes widened, his mouth forming in a surprised ‘O’. he made no sound as he paused in the doorway to the room.

“uh.. hi?” i whisper, afraid of breaking the silence completely. he still stood frozen, not moving for some time which started to send some panic up my spine. maybe this was a bad idea.

and then he ran to me, his body collapsing onto mine as he laid on top of me.

“fuck, i missed looking into your eyes,” he whispered into my chest. i laughed and started playing with his hair as he cuddled into me.

“i missed seeing your face too much,” i admitted nervously, still toying with his hair that seemed to have grown short over the past few weeks.

“i’m glad you decided to stop pretending and talk to me,” he chuckled, nestling his head further into my chest. my fingers froze and my body tensed as i looked down at him. he rested his chin on my chest to look up at me, smiling brightly.

“you knew?” i asked incredulously, shocked that he allowed me to play out my lie this long.

“i mean… you’re no emmy award winning actress,” he chuckled, his eyes never leaving my face. this made me laugh, and i mean sincerely laugh, for the first time in weeks. god, i missed him.

“why didn’t you say anything?” i asked as i continued to play with his hair. he shrugged first and then stared at me in silence.

“i didn’t want you to feel pressured to talk to me, even with everything that happened, so i let you come to me on your own terms,” he sighed, turning his head to lay on my chest. he inhaled and exhaled slowly, content with the moment he was living in. it was absolute bliss having him here in this moment. i took a second to look at his frame. he looked tinier than i remembered. his hair was thinning out and his skin was as pale as snow.

“how bad is it?” i ask after while. i could feel his body go rigid at my question as he tried his best to think of something to say.

“ugly truth or beautiful lie?” he asked. of course his answer is poetic. it wouldn’t be him if he didn’t.

“honestly? the ugly truth. i’m tired of living my life in beautiful lies,” i sigh, my fingers threading themselves into his dark locks.

“what do you mean?” he asks, his eyebrows furrowing. i giggle and shake my head.

“nuh-uh. you first tough guy,” i laugh. he chuckles and then exhales deeply, trying his best to compose himself.

“i’ve stopped my chemo and am gradually weening off of the radiation,” he murmurs. i feel my heart drop at the news. it was as bad as i thought.

“is there a reason?” i asked him, trying my best to understand the medical aspect of everything.

“they wanted me to stop treatment altogether. but.. i couldn’t just give up. not like that,” he pouted, his thumb rubbing circles on my hips. i didn’t realize he had even grabbed my hips to begin with.

not like that.

he meant not while i was battling for my life. he didn’t want anything to happen to me because… he hadn’t said goodbye to me yet.

i was fighting to keep the tears inside as i started rubbing his back.

“i know what you’re thinking and it’s not like that,” he murmured.

it never really surprised me anymore how well jungkook could read me like a book. before, it used to scare me. i was always one to mask how i was truly feeling inside. i could say i was fine with a smile on my face and people would buy it like it was on sale. now? i could fool everyone else except jungkook. never jungkook.

“what else am i to think except for the fact that you are holding out for me?” i asked incredulously. he sat upright, legs crossing as he sat at the foot of my bed.

“it’s not for you. it’s because of you,” he reasoned.

“what’s the difference?” i asked.

“i’m not living for you. it’s too much of a burden to place on your shoulder. but it’s because of you that i have found a reason to live again. to want to keep fighting even when i have no fight left in me. you have painted a new world for me to see and i want to live in it with you and only you. you make me the happiest i’ve ever been. and i know i’m not gonna live through this, but with the time i have left i want to spend it with you. because i love you,” jungkook confesses.

i giggle at him and watch as his face falls. i try to bite back my laughter but i couldn’t help it as i reminisce back on our first encounter. i grab his hand and kiss his knuckles softly, my laughter bubbling out as i do so.

“remember when we first met and you told me to be careful not to fall in love with you?” i murmur, stroking the back of his hand in soft circles.

“yeah?”

“i should’ve probably taken you seriously back then…”

#bts #kpop #bts jungkook #jungkook #bts jeon jungkook #bts scenarios #bts angst #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts fluff #jeon jungkook fic #jeon jungkook angst #jeon jungkook fluff #jeon jungkook scenarios #jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook scenarios #kpop scenarios

[rhysismydaddy]

Casual Ruin Pt. 5 (Elriel)

Elain's part of the Damnation series.

Last part! I know I said this would be 6/7 parts, but I realized I have no idea what the fuck I had planned to write in those parts, so it's 5 instead hahah. didn't edit the ending whoops

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

__________________________________________

~Elain~

It's three in the morning when I hear it.

We're laying in bed, and even though I should asleep like the man next to me, I can't stop thinking about how little time we have left.

How has the past month gone by so fast?

It feels like yesterday I was standing on my stoop, watching Azriel open up and tell me things he's since admitted he's never told another person.

It feels like yesterday since I decided that I care for him more than I care about what he does.

But it wasn't yesterday; it was a month ago.

A month that's been filled with dinner dates, soft smiles, laughter, and enough tender moments my heart feels full. He's a

The plane ticket hidden in the bottom of my purse is a constant reminder that this is just a summer fling, that it isn't supposed to mean anything. Two weeks from now, I'm supposed to get on that flight and never look back.

Except it feels impossible.

It broke my heart when I walked away from him a month ago, and that was before he told me the details of his life.

Now I know him.

I know about the way he smiles in the morning and how he shakes his head when he laughs, like he can't believe he's doing so. I've learned how ticklish his ribs are, how he likes his coffee, his favorite type of cigarettes.

I know about his family, how his mother died giving birth to him and his father resented him from the day it happened. I know about the first man he killed, how it made him sick. I know what his tattoos really mean.

And what I never could've expected is that everything I've learned, the good and the bad, have tied me to him in a way that feels permanent.

How am I supposed to just walk away from that?

The thought of never seeing his smile, never feeling his rough hands cup my face with a gentleness he doesn't show the world... it feels like missing a part of me.

And it worries me enough I haven't been able to sleep for the past two nights. Like I'm incapable of wasting a minute, I spend the nights watching him sleep.

Which is why I'm perfectly awake when he pulls me close in his sleep and whispers two words that ruin me.

Ti amo.

Tears well in my eyes as I stay perfectly still, replaying the moment over and over.

He loves me.

It's something I knew--something we both probably knew--ever since that day in the rain, but I think we both never said it because we knew our time is limited.

It's been in every touch, every kiss, every moment where we get caught up just staring at each other.

But I want to tell him, I have to tell him, because however good it makes me feel to hear that from him... I know he needs it more.

He's never been loved--never been anyone's first choice, but he's mine, and I want him to know. And I don't want to be just one more person that leaves him and makes him wondering if he'll ever be enough.

So I start to plan.

~A week later, Azriel~

Well, the worst has happened.

I love the fucking woman.

Now my biggest weakness now walks outside my body, with soft brown eyes and dirty blonde hair and bright smiles that light up the world.

And she's leaving in a week.

It scares the shit out of me.

She scares the shit out of me.

Honestly, I hadn't even realized I was in so deep until she said the words "We're done."

All I remember about that day is feeling I'd been stabbed in the chest and looking down to find the blade but not seeing anything but my own hands.

One moment I was convinced I was dying, the next I was in front of her on her stoop, telling her shit I've never told a living soul.

It wasn't then that I realized I love her, but that was when I realized something maybe even more important. I trust her.

Rule 3's been thrown out the window, and I don't even remember when it happened. Was it when she told me I'm not a monster? Or the first time I noticed the way her lips turn up every time I tell her she's beautiful?

Or maybe it was the first time I laid eyes on her as she stumbled into that opera booth, looking like everything I never knew I wanted.

Either way, I'm about a mile up shit's creek with no fucking paddle.

I trust her, love her, and I've only known her ten weeks. Which reminds me, she's leaving.

Which is irritating, because while the mere thought of watching her leave makes me want to level a building, she's currently acting like nothing's wrong.

She's in the bathroom, putting on red lipstick in a slow, taunting way that makes me want to mess it up. I'm sitting in the chair next to my bed, trying to stay calm.

She's watching me watch her in the mirror, and her eyes meet mine for a split second before she looks away, making me suspicious.

That look... I've seen that look before, more times than I can count.

But never from her.

It's a secret.

She looks like she's hiding something.

"Something you need to tell me?" I ask, putting a hand behind my head to prop it up.

Nodding, she comes to stand at the foot of the bed. "Yep."

I raise a brow. "What is it?"

"I'll tell you tonight if you meet me for dinner."

Suspicion and curiosity make me ask, "Where?"

"La Rosa," she responds casually, making me narrow my eyes. It's outside of the city a bit, a small place on the coast I've never had an interest in owning or visiting.

"I've never been there."

"New experiences are good for the soul," she quips, sliding on her sandals. "Just say you'll meet me."

There's a hint of nerves in her voice, so I say, "Of course, dolce mia."

She smiles, victorious. Then she's bounding over, taking my face between her palms, and pressing her mouth to mine.

Before I can ask what she's up to, she's out the door, calling over her shoulder, "Seven o'clock! I'll meet you there."

I get up and slide my jacket on, slipping my hand in the pocket and toying with the piece of metal I've been carrying around for a month.

Sighing, I take it out and throw it on the counter, knowing that if this life has taught me one thing, it's that it won't make a difference.

~

When seven o'clock rolls around, I'm seated at a table, frowning at my surroundings.

I've definitely never been here.

No man has, I'm willing to bet. At least not on his own volition.

There are flowers everywhere. Spilling out of vases, growing on the vines surrounding the open windows, lining the doors that are open to the patio out back.

Besides that, I guess the place isn't too bad, actually. The lights are soft, the weather's nice, and by the smells coming from tables around me, the food will be good.

Elain's running a few minutes late, but she called and told me to go ahead and order.

Apparently, she's come here before, because she told me what to order her. Odd.

A few minutes after I relay the information to the waitress, I spot her coming in the front door and wave her over.

She's a little flushed, her eyes are bright, and the smile on her face gives no doubt she's excited.

I stand up when she reaches me, kiss her, then ask, "What's going on?"

"Nothing," she says too quickly. "Did you order?"

"Yeah. Have you been here before or something?"

She nods, diverting her eyes down and to the right in the classic tell of a lie.

I sigh, frustration getting the better of me. "Elain, what are you hiding from me?"

Before she can answer, the food comes. Two plates of pasta are set in front of us, and I know instantly I was right about the food being good.

But no matter how good it looks, there's only one thing on my mind.

"Elain."

She waves a hand. "Just eat, Azriel. I promise I'll tell you in like five minutes."

"Why not just tell me now?"

"It's more dramatic this way," she explains, making me sigh again.

Women.

She's going to give me a fucking heart attack with her drama.

A little aggressively, I stab the fork in the pasta, taking a huge bite.

I feel her eyes on me, watching me eat, but I act like I don't notice, mentally counting down the seconds until five minutes is up.

I'm at 263 when she asks, "Do you like it?"

"What?"

Rolling her eyes, she gestures to the plate in front of me. "Do you like it?"

"It's good," I reply honestly, a little surprised. I've lived here long enough to know the best places to eat, and I've never heard more than a decent review about this place.

"I'm glad," she says, full lips tilting up. "Since I made it."

I don't get it. Did she bring it with her? Is that why she was late?

Also, why did we come to a restaurant if she was going to cook?

"What? Why?"

She tilts her head, smile growing.

Right as my still-counting subconscious gets to five minutes, she explains, "Because I work here."

~Elain~

He stares at me, bite of pasta halfway between his mouth and the plate.

I've been almost bursting at the seems the past four days trying to keep the secret.

I mean, given what the man does for a living, I didn't think I'd make it more than an hour. And while he's definitely been suspicious, I made it.

"What?" he finally asks, dark brows furrowing as he leans in.

"I have a lot to say," I tell him. "So don't interrupt me."

His eyes narrow like they always do when I tell him what to do, but I ignore it and start listing off the different secrets I've been keeping.

I start with the most important.

"First, I love you."

The fork clangs against the plate as he drops it.

I smile, biting my lip and trying not to cry at the look on his face.

"I think I have since that first night when we danced in the bar. Or maybe when you took me to the beach. I don't know." Taking a deep breath, I say, "I tried to stop, when I found out... everything. But it was useless, because I was as in love with you then as I am now."

He shakes his head, almost like he's panicked, but I keep going.

"I love you, Azriel. I want to be with you more than I've ever wanted anything. And I can't bear the thought of leaving you. I don't want to."

Gesturing around us, I say, "I got a job here, and my landlord said she can draw up a lease. And before you say anything, I'm not giving anything up. The past months have felt like paradise, and I love it here. I liked my job in New York, but it wasn't anything I'll miss."

His eyes are so wide, it'd be a little funny if I wasn't so serious.

I take a sip of wine and try to puta brave face on. A lump forms in my throat, but I manage to say, "But we never talked about anything long term, so if this isn't what you want... I'll go. I promise. I just wanted you to know that you're... it for me. You're everything to me. I choose you."

He shudders, closing his eyes, and I take in how tight his jaw is, how close he seems to coming unraveled.

Is he freaking out? I definitely am.

After a few moments, I realize he's still waiting on me, so I laugh and say, "You can talk now."

He doesn't.

He just opens his eyes and stares at me, the shock in his gaze clear to read.

Nerves blossom. I was so sure he'd be happy, but maybe he isn't ready. Voice turning shaky, I ask, "Is this what you want?"

Slowly, he shakes his head, but before I can panic, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a key, holding it out between us. "I want you to live with me, not at the townhouse."

All the nerves fly out the door, and I laugh, not quite able to believe it.

How long has he been carrying this around?

The tears finally spilling over as I take the key from him. "Okay."

He brushes my cheeks off with his thumb, looking at me like he's never seen anything more beautiful.

Azriel's quiet for a moment, and I give him time, knowing that whatever he wants to say is hard for him.

"Ti amo. Mi spaventa così tanto."

I love you. So much is scares me.

"You? Scared? I don't believe it."

I'm trying to joke and lighten the mood, but he's completely serious as he shakes his head, cupping my jaw with his hand. "You scare the shit out of me, Elain."

My heart clenches, and I fight a fresh wave of tears as I lean into his touch. "You scare me, too."

"But you're not leaving."

It's said like a hopeful promise, like something he needs to hear again and again to accept it's true.

I shake my head. "I'm not leaving," I whisper.

He finally smiles, that big smile I'm positive he only gives me, and leans over the table to kiss me softly. "Say it again."

"I love you."

He kisses me again, and I slide my hands in his hair and kiss him back, feeling like everything before now has led up to this. He's the grand finale, the one I didn't know I was waiting for.

I pull back a little, just far enough to see his reaction as I whisper, "Meet me in the bathroom."

His eyes flare and his mouth drops open, and I laugh as I get up from my seat and try to walk nonchalantly towards the back.

This hadn't been part of the plan, but I've told him I love him, and now... I want to prove it.

Plus, I don't know what it is about him, but he feeds the adventurous side of me like nothing else.

I can feel him watching me from the table as I make my way across the restaurant.

Thankfully, the place is busy tonight, so I don't think anyone notices when, as soon as I shut the bathroom door, he rises to follow me.

A moment later, he slips in with me, taking in the dim lights, closed stall, low music. He flips the lock, and it's like it snaps the thread between us, descending us into chaos.

He's on me in a second, arms wrapping around me and lifting me. My legs bracket his hips as he pushes me up against the wall and traps my hands above my head.

"Say it again," he demands breathlessly, eyes bright and full of heat.

I nip his lower lip, then kiss it softly. "I love you, Azriel."

His mouth crashes into mine, unrestrained and demanding and deep enough I lose myself in him.

My hands are in his hair, his are pushing up the hem of my dress.

There's a brief moment of adjusting, and then he's easing into me. His eyes are on me, his lips are parted, and as I tighten around him, he makes a deep rumbling sound. It's the hottest thing I've ever seen.

"You're mine," I tell him, tilting my hips to take him deeper. "And I'm yours."

He shudders, eyes going black. "You're mine."

His hips claim mine, then, pulling out and thrusting back in, moving me up the wall. I tighten my fingers in his hair as he hits a spot deep inside me, and he groans.

Moving his hands to my hips, he brings me down as he thrusts up, and I moan, then slap a hand over my mouth.

I work here, for God's sake.

"This is not very professional," I mutter, smiling when his lips twitch.

"No," he agrees, thrusting into me harder. "And it's definitely inappropriate."

I clamp my lips together, pressing my hand to my mouth again to stifle the involuntary whimper I let out.

Azriel grins, tugging on my earlobe with his teeth and whispering, "You might need to go to confessional again."

Rolling my eyes, I move my hands to his shoulders, then lean in to lick up the column of his neck. "Between the two of us, I'd say you're more likely to end up on your knees tonight."

He laughs, tugging my head back to kiss me again. His tongue meets mine in a wet, deep slide that makes me shiver. His hips brush mine. His hands hold me just right, keeping me against him.

Pulling back, he brushes his lips over mine and whispers, "I love you."

The easy, conversational pace is abandoned, and we're moving harder against each other, the only sounds our labored breathing and muffled moans.

He brings a hand to cover my mouth, and I cover his with mine, and we're in tandem, both of us lost in the other.

He comes when I do, driving deeply into me and stilling, his head buried in my neck.

We spend a while like that, and when I eventually slide down the wall, we take our time adjusting our clothes. He keeps stopping me to kiss my shoulder or brow, and I waste too much time just looking at him.

When we're both ready, he extends a hand and grins. "Let's go home."

I smile, unable to help it. "Let's go home."

_____________________________________________

Thank you for reading! This is the last part, although I might do an epilogue one day (don't hold your breath lol).

Send me asks if you have em :)

@elorcan-trash @sweetdaisybell @anyblinding @acreativelydifferentlove @loosingdreams @poisonous00 @januarystears @emikadreams @swankii-art-teacher @thedarkdemigod @full-tilt-diva @biggestwingspan-az @bookstantrash @mari-highladyof-feels @pilesofriles @bamchickawowow @teddytdr @perseusannabeth @shinya-hiiragi @cursebreaker29 @a-bit-of-a-cactus @elriel4life @girl-who-reads-the-books @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @live-the-fangirl-life @ireallyshouldsleeprn @highqueenofelfhame @autophobiax @rowaelinismyotp @nahthanks @ghostlyrose2 @lovemollywho @inardour @tillyrubes10 @claralady @tswaney17 @rowanisahunk @superspiritfestival @thegoddessofyou @awesomelena555 @booksofthemoon @greerlunna @jlinez @studyliketate @over300books @justgiu12 @maastrash @aesthetics-11 @b00kworm @sleeping-and-books @musicmaam @hizqueen4life @maybekindasortaace

#elriel #elriel fanfiction #acomaf #acowar #acotar #acomaf fanfiction #acotar fanfiction #elain archeron #elain x azriel #azriel #a court of thorns and roses

[heliads]

Into Thin Air

Newt doesn’t know what to think after Y/N disappears one night in the Scorch. She’s nowhere to be found, until a few weeks later she shows up with the girls from Group B. The only problem is that she can’t remember who Newt is, and all Newt can remember is how much he loves her.

masterlist

Newt sits alone, staring out at the desolate desert before him. He’s hidden from view, sheltered by a craggy outcropping, but the protection does little to settle the turmoil of thoughts lurking inside his head. The sound of footsteps approaches behind him, but Newt doesn’t have to turn his head to recognize his friend.

Minho stoops and sits down a few feet away. Newt glances at him. It’s strange- all of Newt’s memories of his life before the Maze have been stripped away, leaving behind only his time trapped within those walls. Minho is his best friend, but Newt can’t help but wonder if he had other friends, before all of this started. Before he was imprisoned in the Maze, before they escaped WICKED and stuck themselves in the desert. Did he have friends before that? Would it really matter if he did, anyway? If they’re not dead by now, they will be soon.

But he has Minho, and that’s enough. Minho’s been his friend for a long time. Newt hasn’t really known anyone for that long, or grown that close, except maybe Alby. Even the thought of the guy makes Newt’s throat burn. He’d known the guy forever, even been his second in command for all that time in the Maze. Newt can still picture Alby’s face in the back of his mind, that look of determination just before the Griever snatched him away. They’ve lost so many people. Alby, and Chuck, and Winston, and-

Newt can’t quite bring himself to finish the sentence.

Distantly, Newt realizes that Minho is still there, and staring out over the same horizon Newt had been studying a few minutes ago. At last, the other boy speaks. “We’re going to find her, you know? There’s no way we won’t.” Newt sighs. “We don’t know if she’s out there anymore. Or if she’s even somewhere we can find.” 

Minho shakes his head, resolute. “She has to be somewhere. They wouldn’t take her just to kill her when nobody is watching.” Newt opens his mouth to argue, but Minho holds up a hand and continues speaking. “WICKED had to have taken her. She would never have left any of us, and definitely not you. Besides, we went to sleep with her right next to us, and woke up to her gone. No footprints, no tracks, no nothing. If she had left on her own accord, we would have seen a trail leading away, but there was just blank sand. It’s like she never even existed. Does that sound like some girl who’s sick of us and wanted to leave, or like WICKED wanted to send a message?”

Newt’s heard Minho’s attempt to soothe his worries a couple of times now, but he still plays along. “What message would WICKED want to send instead of just taking all of us? If they have the ability to get her, what’s stopping them from completing the job and getting all of us back?” Minho jabs a finger in the air, ready to prove his point. “They want to scare us, make us think that WICKED’s way more powerful than we’ll ever be. If they pick us off one by one, they’re hoping that we’ll come back to them easily instead of them having to chase us down. Less damage to the subjects if they return of their own free will, right?”

Newt chuckles quietly. “If they were interested in keeping their subjects in the best condition they wouldn’t have put us through the bloody Maze in the first place. They would have stuck to inkblots and blood tests like any other reasonable doctor.” Minho grins. “Hey, who said they were reasonable? They just don’t want us killed off before they get the chance to do it themselves.”

In spite of himself, Newt feels a smile growing on his face. “Alright, alright. I’ll stop moping. Are we heading out soon?” Minho stands, clapping his friend on the back as he leaves the outcropping. “In a few minutes. Thomas thinks the Right Arm reinforcements should be in the mountains just a mile or so down. We’re almost there.”

The Right Arm. Thomas seems convinced that the people of the Right Arm can help them, and save the Gladers from inevitable deaths at the hands of WICKED. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense- use a shadowy, mysterious organization to escape another mysterious organization? At least the Right Arm isn’t known for running death tests on teenagers. That’s already a bonus.

The path to the mountains is dangerous, but to be honest, what part of their journey hasn’t been dangerous? Newt thinks it’s going fine, that although the terrain isn’t the best they’re at least making progress, and then the bullets start to ring out. Instantly, everyone panics and starts to hurtle toward whatever cover they can scrounge up in the desert, cowering as gunfire rains down around them. From the corner of his eye, Newt sees a couple of figures emerge from the mountains, faces hidden and weapons drawn.

Newt shoves Thomas and Minho to get their attention, and they start to come out with their hands drawn. Three figures stand before them, weapons pointed at them. Newt scans their faces, but he doesn’t recognize the first one, or the next. It’s only when his gaze falls upon the last of the three, on the figure standing farthest away, that he feels his heart freeze in his chest.

It’s not her. It couldn’t possibly be her. But yet-

Before he even knows what he’s doing, Newt is stepping away from the protective cover of the car, away from his friends, and towards the third figure. He can see Thomas and Minho extending their arms to pull him back, but they’re moving slowly, as if coming from far away. All that matters now is the girl before him, the girl with those all-too-familiar eyes that are now glaring at him in fear.

Newt’s voice comes cracked and quiet in the space at the foot of the mountains. “Y/N?” The girl levels her gun at him. “Who are you, and how do you know my name?” Newt stumbles, thrown by less by her threatening tone of voice and more the words that she’s just said. “Y/N? Why don’t you-” Hie voice breaks off into silence. Minho and Thomas are next to him now, and all Newt can do is stare at the girl in front of him. “Why doesn’t she know who I am?”

The other two figures are by Y/N’s side in an instant, the two pairs of three staring at each other. The tension builds and builds until finally the first of the figures glances away, at the other boy walking up to them. “Aris?” Suddenly, the hostility vanishes, and the figures are pulling away their face coverings to reveal the smiling faces of two girls. Aris turns back to them, clearly happy to see the girls. “This is Harriet and Sonya. They’re from Group B.” He addresses the Group B girls now: “They’re with me. They’re friends. They helped me escape from WICKED.”

Harriet and Sonya nod, but Newt just watches as the third girl hesitantly removes her own coverings. Sure enough, it’s Y/N. Harriet notices Newt’s stare and turns to his former friend. “Y/N, do you know these guys?” Y/N shakes her head. “I have no idea who they are, or how they know who I am.” Newt’s heart seems to drop in his chest. “What are you talking about? Y/N, I’ve known you for about a year, ever since you came into the Maze.”

Y/N’s eyes hold no recognition, no laughter, no light. She seems to have no idea who Newt is. “All I know is that I showed up one day alongside the Group B girls. They’ve been my family ever since.” She walks away, presumably to tell the people with guns to stand down. Newt is left alone with the words dying on his tongue: We were your family first.

Newt watches from a distance as his friends talk and laugh around him. They’re happy to have the Group B girls, who went through the Maze just like the Gladers did, and they’re relieved to have the protection of the Right Arm. Newt should be out there too, finally allowing himself to relax or at least have a good time, but he can’t quite muster up the energy to fake the smiles. Y/N doesn’t recognize him. That’s the only thing he has room to think about right now.

As if just thinking about the girl was a summoning, Newt turns to see a familiar figure walking away from the fire and coming to stand next to him. This picture, the two of them standing so close together, away from everyone else, is so painfully familiar that it hurts to know that she isn’t thinking of the connection they once shared. All Newt can think about is that he’s stood by her a hundred times, but all she can think about is that the boy next to her is a stranger, someone she’s never even seen before.

Y/N is the first to speak. “Is it true? Did you really- did you really know who I was?” Newt nods hollowly. “We first met when you arrived in the Maze. We were friends for a while, and-” He cuts himself off. He can’t talk about that, not right now. “And then we escaped, and you disappeared.” Y/N looks at the ground, at the fire, at her friends. Anywhere but him. “I have this strange feeling like I know who you are. Or I should, at least. But I can’t remember a single thing about you.” Newt stands silently, not trusting himself to speak.

Y/N turns to him at last, eyes burning into his own. He’s missed that look, that focus brushing across her brow. “Can you tell me what I was like? You know, in your Maze?” Newt sighs. “I’m not sure we could fit it into one night. You were there almost as long as I was, bordering on two years.” Y/N’s gaze is unrelenting. “Can you try?” Newt could never say no to her. Not in the Maze, and not now, when it’s just the two of them and he’s missed her so much. He clears his throat, and begins to speak.

“We were friends at first. Probably since the moment you showed up. You had this way of getting people to listen to you, even when the shanks were seconds away from tearing each other apart. There were only a few of us in the Maze, or at least at the beginning. You, me, Alby, and Minho. We were like a little family. I thought our friendship would last forever, and then other boys started showing up.”

Y/N frowns. “Did we fight or something?” Newt laughs ruefully. “No, we just- Well, I was kind of a shucking idiot myself. This one boy showed up, and he used to make me so angry. You’d be doing your job, not focusing on anything else, and then he’d come up and start talking to you. I didn’t know why it was bothering me so much, that he would be there for just a few seconds and the two of you would be laughing like you’d known each other all your lives, and then I realized after a while that it wasn’t him that annoyed me, it was that I was just jealous. Stupid, but jealous all along.”

“I kept it to myself, didn’t want to bother you. I didn’t realize you loved me until later.” Y/N looks up at him, mouth slightly tilted down into a frown. “But then what happened with you?” Newt smiles to himself. “I’d loved you all along. Don’t think I had much choice in the matter. Anyways, it took me a while to get up the courage, but I told you how I felt one night at the bonfire. I was nervous about it, but you just looked at me with this smile and I knew everything was going to be alright.”

Y/N’s smiling now. It’s strange, thinking of that night with this new Y/N next to him. She’s got the same expression on her face as the night Newt told her he loved her, and it cuts away at Newt that she could smile at him like that without remembering that night at all. Newt realizes he’s been staring too long, because Y/N gently nudges his arm. “Go on.” Newt looks away, fighting the shyness that suddenly overwhelmed him.

“We were happy, for a long time. We had months of uneventful life. Well, as uneventful as the Maze can be. Then Thomas and Teresa showed up, and the Maze doors didn’t close, and the Grievers attacked us all.” Newt’s eyes flicker shut as he remembers that night, remembering the tongues of flame spiraling over the buildings and the horrified looks of his friends. He can still hear the screaming, smell the coppery tang of blood like the scene was still being played out around him.

“We managed to escape. Not quite sure how. I don’t think I was scared for myself, more that you were going to die and I was going to have to live without you. When we first showed up at Janson’s building, I thought we were finally out and in the clear. We were so excited to have escaped and have a new life, one where we could actually relax and be just teenagers.” Newt’s voice twists into something bitter as he remembers how hopeful they’d been, and how quickly that hope had fallen apart, just like everything else that seemed to come their way.

“Then Janson turned out to be with WICKED, so we escaped. Took a while and a lot of running, but we made it out.” Newt falls silent, and Y/N tilts her head expectantly. “And then what?” Newt swallows unevenly, still feeling the pain and overwhelming heartache of that one specific night. “And then we were alone in the desert, all of us from the Glade who’d made it out plus Aris. We went down to sleep, late at night. You were right next to me. When I opened my eyes, you were gone.”

Newt looks away, fighting back the hot prick of tears threatening to appear at the corners of his eyes. “That was the worst part. You were right there, so close. There was no way you could have left without waking me. I knew you wouldn’t leave, so it had to be WICKED, but it still hurt. I was so worried that you’d died, or that they had dragged you back to their facilities and were experimenting on you-”

Newt can’t finish. Y/N nods, understanding. “And then you showed up to the mountains, and I had no idea who you were.” “Exactly.” Y/N sighs, leaning up against the rocky crag behind her. “I don’t know what to say. It all sounds familiar, but it just doesn’t sound like me. Are you sure that you’ve got the right girl?”

Newt nods. He’d know Y/N in a heartbeat, across the darkest night, anywhere. This girl is the one he loves, right down to that slight crease in her brow that she gets whenever she can’t figure something out. “I don’t know how to explain it. You are you, Y/N, and you’re the same girl I’ve been in love with since the Maze. You’re the same girl who always had a smile, even when things got dark, who yelled at the Builders but made friends with all the Greenies, who helped everyone survive the Maze because that’s just who you were.” Newt draws a ragged breath. “You’re the same Y/N who made me fall in love with you, and I’m not going to let any trick from WICKED convince me to let you go.”

Newt’s staring off into the darkness of the desert, but he turns with a start when he hears a slight noise from Y/N. He stares at her. She’s almost bent double in pain, hands clutching her head. He rushes over to her, helping her to the ground. “Y/N! Are you alright? What happened?” She just shakes her head, gritting her teeth through the pain. “I don’t know. You started talking, and I felt like I recognized something, and then my head started feeling like it was about to crack in two.”

She squeezes her eyes shut in agony, and her shoulders tense up in a spasm of anguish but then suddenly fall still. She lies on the ground, silent. Newt feels like his heart is in his throat. “Y/N? Can you hear me?” Her eyes open slowly, eyelashes fluttering in a dark frame around her eyes. She looks at him for a moment, then two, as if drinking in the sight of him. She reaches out a shaking hand to him, lightly touching his cheek. “Newt?” Her voice is quiet, as if she’s doubting herself, and then she breaks into a grin.

“Newt. Yes. I remember you.” All of Newt’s worries leave him in a rush, and he wraps his arms around her, pulling her close. “Y/N?” She nods, laughing slightly. “I remember everything. The Maze, the Gladers, you, everything.” She pulls back, smiling, so she can look in his eyes. “I don’t remember the part about you being in love with me from the start. You should have told me that earlier.” Newt chuckles, helping her stand. “I was trying to help you get your memories back. I’m sure it was just a dramatized detail.”

She flashes him a beaming glare. “I’m sure it was.” Newt can’t take his eyes off of her. “I was so worried, you know that? I was so worried that you’d left.” Y/N shakes her head. “I could never leave you. Not in a million years.” Newt lets himself smile again, and reaches out to lock his hand around hers. Y/N remembers him. The girl he loves is finally back once more.

#newt #newt imagine #newt x reader #newt imagines #newt oneshot #maze runner #maze runner imagine #maze runner x reader #maze runner imagines #maze runner oneshot

[tenkoscumslut]

LoV headcanons

This is is there toxic traits when in fights:

Dabi:

Dabi is already described as a sociopath and manipulative.  If you guys weren’t in a relationship he becomes much more aggressive, or if you try to break up he will physically harm you because he doesn’t know how to keep you.

If you guys are in a relationship he would completely degrade you, and make fun of your ‘flaws’ and not give a fuck if your crying.  He will continue to insult you in the meanest way possible.  He honestly doesn't realize boundaries with anything.

What he does to make you feel better:

After your fight, you obviously say you guys are done and leave.  He’d probably have a fake sense of relief and will either go out to just walk and go over the entire fight, or he will take a nap.  After a few weeks he will slowly come to realize how he hurt you, and realized you guys aren’t in a relationship anymore.

Him being the possessive bitch he is, will not want you with another man, female or just romantic partner in general.  He would track you down, stalk you, even go as far to kill anyone who even shows interest in you.  He will start an obsession with leaving dead bodies at your window still, or them but cut up into tiny pieces in a bowl soaking in their own blood.

You guys don’t get back together because Dabi is crazy, and to obsessed with you.  Dabi never got over you, he wont not until you come back to him.

Shigaraki:

(help i'm reading a Hawks cheating story and I have tons of Hawks posters surrounding me.  I want to commit hate crimes on our Birb)

His quirk.  You would be arguing about something simple, like a video game.  Shigaraki is impatient and doesn’t know how to control himself, he attacked you while you were in mid sentence.  He’d be overly furious, and be shouting at you to shut up.

This happened on the regular, this time Shigaraki had taken it to far.  Everyone was use to the fights, they would leave for a few hours and return like nothing had happened.  Both of you were screaming at each other at the bar about a mission where you had to leave the new guy behind to the heros.  Both of you were furious, there was no fighting, not yet anyways.

“You can treat people like that!”, you shouted at your boyfriend who was fuming, “Who gives a fuck?!”, he hissed.  “me! I give a fuck!”, you exclaimed.  You guys were in a storm, it was so much bigger while you two were in it, but once you both looked away you realized how small it was.  Shigaraki grabbed your wrist, he was sure it was 4 fingers.

He didn’t notice the small tick of his pinkie hitting your skin, he didn’t notice the pained expression you wore, or you slowly turning into an ash.  “Tomura!”, you exclaimed, he let go.  You scrambled away from him, tears were falling down your eyes.  Then he noticed your arm slowly decaying, and the scared sobs leaving your lips.  He called Kurogiri, but nobody picked up.

He was frantically trying to stop it, anything.  He grabbed a knife to cut your arm off, but it had already spread to your chest.  The fear in your eyes had him crumbled to the floor.  HIs quirk was destroying everything around him, everything he loved, cared for, everything that meant something.

He knew you’d be gone forever, the only person who loved him was dying before his eyes.  He couldn’t do anything, he’s never felt so hopeless, or so defeated.  He looked at your eyes one last time, you didn’t have to say word, and to be honest it’s better left unsaid.  The feelings still remain the same, sometimes you feel more than you see.  

All the faces Shigaraki saw, every single day, yours was the one that brought him happiness, you were the one who brought him joy and love, you were the face he needs.  And when his mind is absorbed in on screen, and he’s walking blindly through crowds of people, he hears your voice reminding him all is going to be ok.

Now you were just a pile of ash. As simple as that, forgotten, dead.

Now he truly was alone.

Hawks:

(btw guys I am so sorry for this one I love Hawks, he would never cheat on you since he is a Red Tailed Feathered Hawk but I can see him doing this, once again I am sorry)

You guys had a fight, a pretty nasty one.  He had been leaving early in the morning and coming back late at night from work.  You were mostly concerned about his mental health, I mean, yes you did stay up at night and sometimes not sleep for a week, but this was on another level.

Hawks was mad you were trying to tell him what to do, when honestly you were just concerned, and almost begging him to come back and get some rest.  He left for a good few weeks, the entire time you were worried sick the point you had to quit your job, well more of fired for not working and lack of mental stability.

When Hawks returned he seemed quiet, less joyful. You wanted to slap him, but hug him and kiss him, just do everything to him at this point.  You couldn’t bring your feet to move though, the air was thick with a pregnant silence.  He was hiding something, you could tell by the way his eyes were full of fiery spirit or joy.  Even when fighting, or upset, he would look so alive.  Now he looked dead.

He sat down at the counter, drumming his fingers against the marbled surface, “There’s something I have to tell you”, he said.  “I stayed at my assistants house”.  An odd announcement you thought, but he wasn’t done.  “She kissed me”, he stated.

You were in shock, not able to utter a word for a few seconds, “W-what....what did you do?”, you had choked out.  “There’s a reason why I was gone for a week”, he mumbled.  A pain you hadn’t known struck your chest, he had cheated on you.

He fucking cheated on you.

You wanted to cry, to scream, to punch him, to leave, but none of that came up.  The man you had once loved, the man you had thought you knew was someone else.  “I understand if you want to break up”, he mumbled.  Your chest fought for air, all this love, all this compassion, this sympathy, you had gave up almost everything for him.  

“Fuck you”, was all you managed to say before leaving his apartment.

~A few months later~

You had gotten over him, even getting into a new relationship with his Assistant no less.  To be honest she was drop dead gorgeous with one of the most beautiful personality.  You loved her with all your heart, and so did she.  Now she had forgotten her lunch at home, you frowned knowing you would have to go to Hawks agency to deliver it to her.  But you were prepared for that.

You had a knew life, you had an amazing girlfriend, you loved her, and she loved you.  Once you were preapared to go deliever the food, you left the apartment and set foreward to Hawks Agency.  Little did you know Hawks was beyond eager to see you walking towards his Agency, he maybe or maybe not had been watching the security camera footage to see if you were ever going to come back to him.  His wings flapped excitedly when he saw you opening the door with a small container in hand.

“Shoyo, Y/N is coming, let’s go meet her downstairs!”, he exclaimed happily.  Shoyo did not like Hawks anymore, seeing him for the cheating bastard he was made her want to puke.  She rolled her eyes, not thinking it was her Y/N.

She followed him down the stairs, when she saw you a smile appeared, “Hey Y/N”, she chirped happily.  “Hey bub”, you greeted back.  Wait, no, that’s Hawks nickname, and why were you talking to her?! Wouldn’t you hate her for sleeping with your soulmate?!.

Hawks was in awe when you pecked her lips softly and whispered a few obsenities into her ear, Shoyo licked her lips.  “Sounds good babe!”, she said with a blush.  “W-what?!”, hawks shouted.  You looked over at him with a confused expression.  “Why are you with her?!”, he shouted.

“she’s a great person”, you said slowly, “And I love her”.  Shoyo grinned happily, wrapping her arm around your shoulder, he was furious, how dare you date someone else, his assistant no less,

From that day on he stalked you, leaving dead birds at your door, promising to kill Shoyo if you dare even show any affection towards her.  You and Shoyo will never solve the mystery of the man who still loves you.

Toga:

No no no nono nonono she is baby she would not hurt you in anyway during a fight, same with Twice, Mr. Compress, Spinner and Kurogiri!.

#shigaraki tomura #shigaraki-x-reader-angst #shigaraki headcanons #shigaraki x reader #dabi x y/n #dabi my hero academia #dabi x me #dabi x keigo #dabi x tomura #hawks x you #hawks smut #hawks x reader #pro hero hawks

[step-on-me-khun]

Hi! First of all I love your work when it comes to these things 🥺 The portrayal accuracy is so on point!! Anw, suggesting an x reader scenario where reader rejects becoming a zahard princess because she wants to love khun---he gets flustered and stuff then fluff/smut ending

Hello <3 Thank you! Hope you like and enjoy.

NSFW - No minors please!

Warning: Smut

Words Count: 1981

You? A princess of Jahad? Most people would be thrilled at such an offer. You weren't one of them. Was it nice that you were considered strong and powerful? Of course, it was. But respect from those around you was something you didn't want to lose.

You couldn't be a princess for Jahad anyway. You would have to give up on love, and it was something you didn't want to let give up. Being around that someone was more important than being a frightening woman.

There was nothing you wanted to tell him, and this wasn't important. But this was Khun. He would find out eventually. Either you would have to come clean to him, or he would find out himself.

Every time you thought about him, you wanted to cry. Meeting in secret wasn't an option. Your heart wouldn't be able to take it.

"Hey, what do you think of me becoming-" you start.

"-a princess of Jahad? I already know," Khun interrupts, surprising you a little.

"How did you know?"

"I have my ways," he flashes a smug smile your way. "It's your choice. I'm not going to talk you in or out of it,"

Your look down and sign, your fists clenching by your side.

Khun noticed, "is something wrong?"

You both sat on the end of his bed, the TV in front of you on. He could tell you were tense. Khun was good at reading people.

"There was a reason for me not accepting their offer," you say, staring up at the ceiling.

Hiding your feelings any longer wouldn't help you in any way. But it was difficult for you to confess.

"I didn't ask, but okay," Khun says bluntly. He was oblivious to how you were feeling about him. It would be better if he secretly found out and initiated things. That wasn't likely to happen.

Khun did want to know, but he didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable. It was a big decision. Your emotions were all over the place. Saying the wrong thing was likely to make things worse for you.

A sigh escapes Khun's mouth, "I'm not going to rush you to do anything," he starts, trying hard to sound caring, "I can tell something's eating at you. I'm here if you want to share your problems,"

"I can't do that," you quietly say.

"And why's that?"

You close your eyes and sigh, worried about what you were about to do and say.

"I don't want to hurt you,"

"Don't be an idiot," his blunt words and tone weren't out of the ordinary. You didn't want him to be annoyed at you. "You're not someone who gets to me that easily,"

"Oh," he left you with nothing to say. But still, the situation wasn't exactly delicate. You wanted to scream and cry at the same time.

The tension that built inside you grew more and more. It made you feel sick inside. Bottling everything up like this did no good to you at all.

"I didn't want to be a princess because," you start, taking a deep breath to prepare yourself.

"Don't," Khun stops you before you could tell him anything.

Just as you had got yourself comfortable to confess to him, he stops you. There could be many reasons as to why he did, but all you felt was confusion. He was clever. You didn't think about what you'd do if he guessed what you'd say to him.

Khun gets off the bed and moves in front of you. "If you're going to tell me that I'm the reason you didn't join, then we can settle this whole situation right now,"

His pale hands gently cup your face. Your eyes wandered from the floor to his blue eyes. Those blue ocean-like eyes made you feel like you were falling into the deep and never-ending sea. It was easy to get lost in him.

"But Khun, I,"

"I know, you don't have to explain anything. I could tell from how much you were struggling,"

You couldn't help but wonder he if knew. He could be acting out of pity or out of spite. Lord knows how anyone could ever read into this guy, but that alone made you fall for him harder.

"I'd do anything for you, (Y/N)," his voice was soft and low.

You stared into his eyes for so long that you didn't notice until it was too late, his soft lips pressed onto yours so gently. It made you jolt a little. He had found you while you were lost.

He was so sweet with you. It was nothing like what he had been like before. Your hands were dying to reach up and grab onto his hair.

All this action between your mouth made your arousal peak. You got hotter and hotter by the second.

Just as your hands left the bed to reach his hair, Khun pulls away. He left you feeling unsatisfied.

Both of you were red. A chuckle escapes Khun's mouth as he sees your face: mouth slightly agape, your cheeks red.

"Look at how red your face is," he says, smiling smugly at you.

"Shut up," you say, embarrassed by him, "you're face is red too,"

Nothing you could ever say would make him as embarrassed as you. He would always try to keep his cool. Like he was testing you.

His thumb lightly caresses your cheekbone. "I do love you," he says quietly, pressing his forehead on yours. "You don't know how much it would hurt me to have you leave,"

You spent a few moments staring into each other's eyes again. Khun's long fingers slid delicately across your face like they were taking in every inch of your skin.

You hit the bed below you quickly as Khun pushes you down. His eyes turned dark; they grew sinister the more you looked at him.

Nothing inside you wanted him to stop, even as his top half hovered over you. You hadn't even told him how you felt.

His fingers pull on the hem of your top, yanking it up over your head.

Your arms were by your side, fingers grabbing tightly onto the bed.

A knee goes between your legs, up near your already wet core. Khun was teasing you, which wasn't surprising at all.

His teeth graze lightly on your earlobe. A strained whine fell from your lips. The feeling of his breath on your neck giving you goosebumps. He gently pulls on your earlobe then releases it.

"I love you," you whisper, nearly inaudibly. Realising what you just said, your eyes widened, and your face reddened more. Since when were you so forward?

The sound of Khun chuckling echoed in your ear, "I could've guessed." He moves your bra straps off your shoulders, then kisses the right one. "You haven't pushed me away yet,"

That was true. But Khun was so clever and so good at reading into situations that you didn't think about his reaction at first.

His lips leave a trail of soft kisses from your collarbone up to your neck, trying to search for that sweet spot. Breathy moans escape your mouth as he continues, his hands behind your back, trying to unclasp your bra and succeeding nearly effortlessly.

After a while of searching, Khun finds that spot on your neck. A few short moans leave your lips as his mouth attacks your skin, his teeth nibbling on it.

It took everything inside you not to squirm around too much at the feeling. Khun went from nibbling to kissing to sucking on your sweet spot, then going back and nibbling again. You were becoming impatient.

"Stop it," you whine.

Yet again, all you earned was a chuckle from him. He liked you like this.

He moves from your neck, hovering over you again.

"Aww, you're not getting needy, are you?" He mocks you.

You shift and turn your head to the side, "maybe a little," you say, then turn to look at him again.

A smug smile lit up his face. His hands quickly undid his shirt buttons, then swiftly pulled his shirt above his head.

You watched him as he undressed, moving to your lower clothing, removing it just as quickly as his shirt, leaving you naked in front of him.

"You're not scared, are you?" Khun asks, a little worried.

"No, I don't need to be. I'm with you,"

You could hear the shuffling of clothes as Khun rushed to get rid of his.

"That's what I like to hear," Khun says as he hovers over you once again, placing a kiss on your forehead as he pushes inside you slowly.

"You don't need to hold back," you say as your hands reach his back.

"If that's what you want, then I'm not going to,"

The moment you told him that, he sped up. You weren't aware of how rough he would be. But it didn't matter. He was making you feel good.

Your nails dug into the skin of his back, pushing him a little lower onto you.

Nothing but sweet moans left your mouth as the speed of his thrusts got more and more intense. It felt like you were close to breaking.

After all the anxiety you had built up in you faded away, a sense of relief rushed from your head to your toes.

His hands moved your legs over his shoulders, giving him a better angle.

Of course, Khun was enjoying it. Seeing your angelic face was enough for him to lose himself. But he didn't.

It was difficult for you to hear it, but you would often hear small grunts and groans escape Khun's mouth.

You felt like you were going to sink into the bed.

"Ah, dammit, Khun," you moan, feeling a knot form inside you.

"Mmm, I know, beautiful," Khun groans.

It was the first time he had called you anything other than an idiot. It made your heart flutter.

The feeling of your soft walls clamping around him made Khun's thrusts more erratic. A hiss escapes his mouth as he closes his eyes, enjoying how you felt around him.

Your forehead press against each other as you cried out loudly, your vision turning white as you came on his length.

His thrusts still were as fast as before. A breathy groan leaves his mouth as he releases inside you.

The light touch of your breath skimmed across your faces as Khun slowed down, then came to a halt, pulling out of you slowly.

Khun climbs onto the bed, his weight making you shift as he moves to the top of the bed. He lies on his back, looking at you to join him.

You considered ignoring him and just laying there idly, but you wanted to lay in his arms for a while, so you made your way over to him.

Khun gladly opened his arms to you, kissing your cheek as you lay on top of him. His hands lay on your back, finger brushing through your hair. Now and then, you could feel his nails softly graze your scalp.

"I should have told you ages ago," you say quietly.

"About being a princess of Jahad or?" He questions.

You tut, "both,"

He scoffs at you. "Are you going to keep anything else away from me?"

"Are you going to stop asking me questions?"

"Only if you tell me that you love me again,"

He was always the type to try and rile you up, even over the silliest of things.

"I love you?"

"Idiot,"

"You're nice," you say sarcastically.

"I know," he pecks your face, "but that's why you love me,"

You smile up at him, eyes meeting each other.

"I do love you, Khun. I'm sorry it took me so long to say it,"

"Don't be silly. I love you too, dumbass,"

taglist

@rizonacigaravenue @unexceptional-h @aoi-turtle

#tower of god #khun aguero agnis #kami no tou #khun x reader #khun aa

[sinner-as-saint]

You Were Made To Be Mine - 3.

Pirate!Bucky x Mermaid!Reader

Part 3 of this series.

Run-through: Bucky is one of the greatest pirates ever known. Living peacefully in his vast and flourishing archipelago; filthy rich and respected by all those around him. He is the leader of his people and his massive fleet, and is viewed as no less than a king by his crew and the people on his lands. He, however, has a secret that he keeps from everyone. The infamous and brawny pirate has lost his heart to one of the most beautiful creations he’s ever seen – you. Ever since the moment he saw you, he knew that you were meant to be his. But he belonged to the earth, you to the ocean. Could love and resilience somehow find a way to unite two worlds?

Themes: mermaid!reader, mythological elements, pirate!bucky, fluff, slight angst, smut

a/n: This will be the last part of this series. Thank you to everyone who loved this series, and pirate!bucky as much as I did! I love you guys so much!

One week in your absence felt like a thousand years to the heartbroken man you had left behind.

A tragedy of his own making, truth be told.

Bucky was miserable, torn and completely unable to function properly now with you gone. He could barely sleep. And spent most of his time on the shore of the small isle – where he used to meet up with you. Which used to be his favorite place but now the shore and the rocks only reminded him of his terrible mistake. A mistake which cost him the one thing he soon realized he couldn’t live without.

Sat there, on the rock where he had spent countless hours with you in the past just talking and learning about each other and falling deeper and deeper in love, Bucky looked down to see a shiny pearl in the palm of his hand. You brought him many pretty things from the depths of the ocean – shells, pearls, but this one pearl stood out the most to him. Mainly because the color of it reminded him of the many hues present on your tail.

“I miss you, my little pearl. Come back to me. Please.” He whispered under his breath. Sad and sulking, he hadn’t smiled since you were gone. Sometimes it felt like he hadn’t lived at all before he met you and now with you gone, he was just… existing – void of any happiness and love and warmth.

As each wave crashed on the shore and on the rocks, it felt like someone was poking at a wound. Each day he returned back to his island, without any knowledge of your whereabouts, it felt like a defeat. Bucky spent the nights at the isle, then rowed back in the morning – where he slept and sulked all day inside his home and came out at night again to row back to the isle. He was a mess and only you could fix it, but you were mad and broken and gone.

His friends were worried sick but there was nothing they could do. It was impossible to even look for you because they would never find you from the surface. All they could do was wait and pray that you come back else they feared that their friend might die from a heartbreak. He was already in so much pain already.

 Bucky never gave up. Midway into the second week, he was hurting just the same but that didn’t diminish his hope. He would sit at the rock and wait each night. You never showed up, but he never stopped showing up either. He’d sit there at the shore or on your rock and just reminisce the time he spent with you. He’d smile to himself, laugh at the funny things, shed a tear or two whenever the realization hit him and reminded him cruelly that you were gone and it was his fault.

“I’m not gonna make it without you. Please come back.” he begged, looking towards the ocean as the gentle, cool and salty wind caressed his face, reminding him of your touch. Damp and cool but it brought him warmth like no other. And just like always, all he got back as a reply was tranquility and the sound of waves dying out on the shore – much like him.

Yet, just like the waves, he was resilient and he kept coming back hoping that one day you’ll show up. He had faith in the love he had for you, and he knew that you’d be reunited again one day. Sooner or later.

Lucky for him, that day wasn’t too far.

-

 One evening, Bucky felt much better than he had ever felt in the past two weeks in your absence. Which was weird because he’d only been sad and gloomy since the day you were gone. But tonight as he rowed to the isle he was almost, dare he say, excited and more hopeful than ever. He was confused but he felt tingly and warm – like how he usually felt whenever you were around.

And much to his surprise, he had been right. Because as soon as he reached the shore, he felt immediately more alive. And something told him that you were close by.

“Sweetheart? Is it you?” he called out, using the moonlight and the torch to look around as much as he could. He found you and his body froze to the ground.

He found you on the shore, not far from him. You appeared to be unconscious, and as though the waves had washed your body up to the shore. He ran to you, and as soon as he got close enough, his heart skipped a beat or two.

You were… human. With legs in lieu of your lovely tail and fins. Oh sweetheart…

Bucky fell to his knees beside your bare body and wedged the torch to the ground and pulled your body up to him. Bucky immediately removed his thick coat and wrapped you in it, sheltering you from the cold. You whimpered as he touched you, because even when not so conscious, you knew it was him. “Wake up, Y/N. Please wake up,” he cradled you against his warm chest.

He could feel your heartbeat as he held you against him, and that was the only thing keeping him from being hysterical due to all the overwhelming emotions he was feeling. Regret for letting you go in the first place. Guilt for being selfish. Heartache because he had broken your heart in doing so. Happiness for having found you at last. It all hit him right in the face like a harsh punch.

He felt like he wanted to scream and shout and just do something, but then the sound of your voice calmed him down instantly.

“Buck…” your voice sounded hoarse and it ended in a cough. You didn’t open your eyes but you felt him there, holding you. You felt safe.

“I’m here, my love. I’m right here. Are you okay? What- I need to know you’re okay, please.” He waited, leaning in to kiss your forehead as he hugged you tighter.

You struggled to talk but you managed to mumble out some words, “It’s… I…everything hurts.”

Bucky felt like he was being torn apart limb by limb. “How can I make it better, sweetheart? Tell me what to do.” he sounded frantic and scared and hurt all at the same time.

Your next few words made him shed tears right there on the shore. “Take me home.” He held you, clinging to you like a child and he cried silently. Whispering and pleading and telling you he’s sorry.

-

When Bucky brought you home that night, his friends were surprised but they didn’t question him right away. Thor was the one who knew just what to give you for the pain. Okoye brought you all that a woman could need. And Sam and Steve worked on what to tell the rest of the people when they find out about you.

You were still slipping in and out of consciousness. And no one knew what happened in those two weeks, all they could do was wait for you to wake up.

“She’s alright. She’s here with you now, with us. Everything’s going to be alright, Buck.” Steve gave him a friendly slap on the shoulder and Bucky nodded. “Get some sleep. I’m sure she’ll be fine by morning.”

His friends all left, telling him they were close by and to call for them if he needed help with anything. Bucky walked them till the front door then hurried his way back to you. He had cleaned you and dressed you in a light blue sleeping gown and placed you in his bed, you looked comfortable and at ease. But he wanted you to just wake up already.

There was so many questions he needed answers to, so much he had to apologize for, so much to make up for.

“I love you more than anything.” He whispered and leaned down to kiss your forehead. “I’m sorry, my love.” Bucky stayed by your side the entire night that night. He hadn’t seen you for two weeks, so each glimpse of you now was a privilege that he was more than grateful for.

-

You woke up abruptly in the middle of the night; panicking and panting. You felt warm, and something was clinging to your body. Your eyes were wide open and you felt so hot. Your chest was heaving and you thrashed around trying to reorient yourself and find out where you were. All you felt was dry, silky material wrapped all around you.

Your movements woke Bucky up and he opened his eyes and realized that the candles had gone out so hurried to light them up again. And once he did and turned around, he caught your stare. You were clearly disoriented and scared.

“Hey…” he came over and sat down on the edge of the bed. His hand reached out to touch your cheek and you closed your eyes and relished the feeling of his skin against yours. Oh how you had missed him. “Are you in pain right now?” he asked, there was so much you and him needed to talk about but right now your comfort and health was more important that anything. Besides, now you would plenty of time to discuss things.

You shook your head. You weren’t in any physical pain, not anymore. But your heart hurt. “How did you…” your voice trailed off, your throat suddenly feeling dry and itchy. Bucky figured you needed some water so he grabbed the nearby goblet of water and held it up to your lips. Reluctantly you leaned in, but then stopped.

“It’s just water. You’re thirsty, you need some. Drink,” he cupped your face gently and tipped the lip of the goblet a little, letting some water into your mouth. You drank half of it and closed your eyes and sighed, it seemed to have quenched your thirst.

“Thank you.” you mumbled as Bucky placed the goblet to the side and turned to face you. One look into his pretty blue eyes and your own started watering. It was all too much to bear. The separation had killed you, the heartbreak as well. And now here you were, thousands of unasked questions between you two acting as another barrier, although you had just overcame a major one.

Bucky spoke up after a few seconds of staring into your eyes. “I found you on the shore. You were barely conscious at the time.” He filled you in on the part which you seemed to have trouble remembering. You nodded and he spoke up again. “I’m sorry I let you go.” He scooted closer to you and caressed your cheek. “I love you. Way too much. It’s killing me, sweetheart. I don’t know what to do.”

He sounded lost and vulnerable. Your tears fell, despite how much you tried to hold them back. You let out a quiet sob as you leaned forward and wrapped your arms around him. He hugged you back, tightly securing his arms around you. Your tears were incessant, but you broke into a faint smile as he cradled your head. Your hugs weren’t damp and cold anymore, but warm and comfortable.

When the tears finally stopped, you pulled away and filled Bucky in on what he missed. After you ‘broke up’ you were pissed and dove into deep waters without a care in the world. You made it to where the potion supposedly was, and after spending multiple days looking for it, you managed to find it.

Your memory was messy and scattered after that. You remember feeling pain. A lot of pain, and you remember passing out and feeling like you were being torn in two.

“I must have lost consciousness then. I don’t remember. But the waves thankfully brought me to the shore.” You finished. Bucky listened attentively. God, he felt awful.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you.” he apologized, looking down in his lap where he held both your hands in his.

You squeezed his hands. “It’s okay, you didn’t know.”

“I was stupid to let you go.” He argued.

You smiled and reached up to touch his face. “I wouldn’t be here, like this,” you pointed at your lower limbs, “if you didn’t let me go.”

“I love you.”

You smiled and leaned in to kiss him. “And I love you.” you mumbled against his lips.

Bucky spent the whole night just holding you close to him. You were still a little weak and unwell, but you promised him you would be alright in the morning. After all, you were way too excited to explore his island and meet his people and be one of them.

“Will they like me?” you asked, unable to fall asleep. Bucky chuckled and leaned down to kiss the top of your head.

“They’ll love you.” he replied.

-

He had been right.

As soon as his friends came by the next morning, they were all impatient to see you at once. They told Bucky that they would make up a story and tell the rest of the inhabitants of the archipelago that you were found stranded on an island, and that’s where Bucky found you.

“We have to hide the truth, for her sake.” Sam made sure everybody understood and were on the same page. Everyone nodded.

When Bucky came to get you, you wobbled on your feet a little before standing up. “I’ll have to get used to this.”

Bucky chuckled and came over to help you steady yourself. “One foot in front of the other. We’ll take it slow, sweetheart. Don’t you worry, you’ll get the hang of things in no time.” He smiled and led you out of the room.

You struggled to walk initially, but you were a quick learner. By the time you reached downstairs, you were able to walk on your own, but you still let Bucky keep his arms around you and you held on to him just in case. You met Bucky’s closest friend in the foyer. And the men all stared at you like they had never seen anything like you before. The woman however, Okoye – Bucky spoke of her often, gave you a polite smile.

“Welcome to our world.” She spoke, stepping closer and giving you a polite nod.

You smiled at her, her warmth rubbing off on you. “Thank you for the clothes.” Bucky had told you last night how she had made all the arrangements regarding your clothes. She smiled and said there was no need to thank her.

“You’re one of us now. You’re family.”

You almost shed tear of joy at her words. And something told you that you and Okoye would get along really well in the future. She just had that kind of aura around her; fierce and strong but also almost motherly and caring.

Bucky introduced you to everyone else. You recognized Steve from the swords fight. Then Sam was just as Bucky described him. Thor was much taller and broader than you imagined, but he was also the most gentle out of all of them.

Steve spoke up soon after you were introduced to all of them. “We’re so glad you’re finally here. Now someone,” he looked directly at Bucky, “will finally stop weeping and moaning in sadness.” That earned a round of chuckles and a giggle from you.

Bucky shot Steve a glare and had you not been there, he would have showered his friend with insults. You immediately liked them all. And even after they left, you couldn’t stop smiling.

“I can’t wait to meet everyone!” you chirped as Bucky helped you sit down at the stone table for breakfast. He figured you must be hungry.

“I can’t wait either, but it’s time you eat.” His words made you a little nervous, but also excited. Bucky gave you a quick tutorial on how to handle cutlery and you learnt in less than a few minutes. “That’s really good!” he cheered as you took your first bite of food all on your own.

You chewed cautiously, then turned to him with wide eyes. He chuckled, happy that you seemed to really enjoy human food.

-

That was just the beginning, soon Bucky realized that you were no different than a child experiencing everything the world had to offer for the first time. Bucky really enjoyed walking you through everything; and luckily you learnt everything rather quickly.

By the end of the first week, you were able to walk around on your own, dress yourself up and wash and brush your teeth and do your own hair. Bucky was impressed.

Some days later, Bucky decided that it was time to introduce you to everyone. And he meant everyone.

You had always wanted to be part of one of Bucky’s feast but you had never thought it would be this grand, and crowded and loud and cheery. People gathered around the many tables; loud chatter, laughter and clinging of goblets – it made you happy.

Bucky managed to get everyone’s attention. And told them the makeshift story of how he once found you, stranded on an island far from here. He added to the story and told them that he had to keep you hidden for a week or so because you were injured and sick but you were all better now.

“So I’m glad to introduce you to Y/N, the newest member of our family.” He held your hand showed you off proudly. He didn’t have to say it, everyone present at the massive hall could tell that he was madly in love with you. It could be seen in his eyes as he looked at you in pure adoration.

Your introduction was followed by a loud roar of cheer and claps and merry. Everyone was just happy that their mass was growing, and they took pride in it.

All throughout the feast, Bucky couldn’t help but feel more powerful as he sat next to you. He felt like he was on top of the world, like there was nothing he couldn’t do. You completed him. And you were here now, here to stay. Forever by his side.

Bucky made love to you that night. He couldn’t hold back from touching you anymore. All those nights of sleeping beside you, and not holding you or pleasuring you like he so desperately wanted to, had been pure torture.

Not only for him, but you as well. Having to see him shirtless and having his arms around you almost all the time had been making you feel hot and bothered almost always. But you were too shy and inexperienced to initiate anything so you waited. Until tonight.

Back home from the feast, as soon as you walked into your shared bedroom, Bucky grabbed you and gently pressed you against the door once he closed it behind him. He had you trapped between him and the door, and you weren’t complaining.

The look in his eyes spoke volumes. He was hungry and wild, and ready to ravish you all night long. But he knew he had to be gentle with you. He wondered how to ease you into it but you took care of that by reaching up and pressing your lips to his. You kiss was rough and needy, even Bucky was surprised.

Your body trembled in anticipation as he wrapped his arms around you and walked the two of you towards the large bed. His tongue slipped past your lips, and you let him. He stroked the top of your mouth and you found yourself whining and needing more.

Your body felt like it was on fire. One which could only be doused by his touch. Yet as soothing as his touch was, it wasn’t enough. You wanted more, you wanted him. Unrestrained, and passionately. You needed him so terribly you almost begged.

As soon as your back hit the soft mattress, Bucky pulled away and looked down at you. His body hovered over yours, and your hands caressed the back of his neck lovingly. “Make me yours.” You whispered.

Bucky closed his eyes and sighed. “My little pearl…” he was feeling too much to talk. So he decided to let his emotions show instead. He planned on worshipping your body and make love to you until the sun came up.

Bucky pressed his body down against yours. Nothing had to be said, you could both see it in each other’s eyes; the love, the desire and the need. The feral need. That same tingle spread all over you again – the one you got each time he touched you even in the most innocent ways possible. You looked up to see his eyes had darkened a shade. His grip tightened on your body and he dipped his head and kissed down your neck – making you shiver again.  

“I will make you mine. Just promise you’ll tell me if it hurts or makes you uncomfortable. Yes?” he made sure you understood. You nodded and mumbled a ‘yes’.

Bucky took his time and got you out of the lovely dress you were wearing. As much as he liked it, he liked you better naked. So he didn’t stop undressing you until you were bare against his sheets. He looked down at you like you were a meal, and he, a hungry man with an insatiable appetite. You felt no awkwardness, no shame. You were his, entirely and his gaze only made you feel more confident and beautiful.

He went on to remove most of his clothes as well, leaving only his pants on. Bucky leaned down to kiss every inch of your body. Your lips, down your neck, your collar bones and your chest. He paid a lot of attention to your breasts; licking and biting and sucking, letting his hands cup your breasts and taking his sweet time; caressing and fondling. Instinctively, your back arched off the bed and you whimpered under his soft, yet needy touch. Bucky was eager to show you how much he loves you, but he knew he had to take it slow.

He dragged his soft lips up and down your body, making you tremble under his touch. His beard pricked your skin but it also tickled, making your whine end in a giggle. He smiled when he heard the noises you made, he knew it would be his favorite things to hear from now on.

Your body tingled and burned under his touch, and there was nothing you wanted more than have him buried deep in you. But you were also nervous for your first time together, but the pressing need inside you overpowered the nervousness.

His mouth found yours as his hand slipped in between your legs with ease; caressing your inner thighs as he went. The foreign, but very pleasant feeling caused a shiver to run down your spine; you shivered and moaned through the kiss. His knuckles gently stroked your wet folds; making you whimper. He chuckled against your mouth upon feeling just how aroused you were. Wet, and warm and ready – just as needy as he was.

But he wanted to take his time and savour you first. He ran his fingers up and down your folds, gathering and smearing your arousal around as he went. He poked at your entrance with his finger, “Is this okay, sweetheart?” he wanted to confirm. You nodded quickly, eyes shut and head thrown back.

“Yes… please Buck…” you were breathless already. Pulsing and hot, your body wanted him bad. So bad. He chuckled at your reply and pushed a finger into you and you shivered. He messed with you for a little bit; stroking your walls with his finger, then added another; making you whine.

You felt your hole stretch around his fingers as he was knuckles deep in you, slowly slipping his fingers in and out of you. He kissed the side of your face, along your jaw and down your neck as he sped up. Your legs spread further apart naturally, a sign that you wanted more. Bucky smirked.

“You feel so good around my fingers, sweetheart,” he whispered, nibbling at your jaw. “So warm, and wet…” he chuckled and the sound of his laugh was so hot it made your body clench around his fingers. He noticed and slowed down his pace, purposely teasing you. Oh he wanted to pleasure you so bad, but not so easily… “You’re dripping all over my hand,” he noted, seductively whispering and kissing the shell of your ear, “I wonder how you taste…”

You squirmed at the sound of his words, your heart racing in anticipation as he kissed his way down your body again. Quicker this time, impatient to reach in between your legs. You threw your head back and moaned once his lips kissed your inner thigh and his mouth latched onto your core in no time; his tongue teasing your clit softly. He had you squirming and moaning – a complete mess under him in no time.

He kept his fingers inside you, moving ever so gently against your walls. Your body welcomed the foreign feeling. You felt his rough beard scratch in between your thighs but that was the least of your concerns, all you focused on was his mouth on you. Shamelessly eating you out like you were his favorite meal. His tongue licked up and down your slit, diving in and out of your wet folds, occasionally running over your opening where his fingers were snug inside you.

You moaned and reached down to grip his hair. You squirmed and whined and cried out. Your legs trembled in pleasure, and Bucky lifted one of them and placed it over his shoulders, eager to taste you even more, pushing your core further into his mouth and making you cry out of pleasure. His hands locked around your thighs as the lower half of his face pressed down into your wet heat; his lips drenched with your arousal.

“Hmm,” his hum reverberated inside you, making you squirm. “You taste heavenly, my little pearl.” He whispered and placed a loud kiss right on your clit before getting back to eating you out like a madman again.

Your eyes were shut, but you imagine he must be quite the sight. Big and broad and muscular, knelt in between your legs, his face pushed in between your hips as he took your higher… and higher. A couple more strokes of his tongue and your moans got louder and louder, a strange but sweet pressure forming in your lower regions.

“Let go sweetheart, cum for me.” He mumbled. He had you coming in no time; gushing out all over his lips as he lapped up whatever you gave him. The wet sounds erupting whenever his mouth sucked on your sensitive clit were downright sinful. As the waves of euphoria washed over you, you felt him kissing his way up your body; leaving warm, wet kisses all over your skin until he reached your mouth again. Bucky kissed you deeply and his kiss was a little more rough and messy and demanding than earlier.

You were like a drug. And now that he had had a taste, he only wanted more. He needed more. Bucky pulled away from the kiss a few seconds later. Chest heaving, and recovering from your previous orgasm, you admired the man above you, as he lowered his pants, reached down and pulled out his cock; stroking it while he looked down into your eyes.

You lips parted in hunger. You wanted him so bad it hurt. Your walls clenched around nothing as you watched him stroke himself. His size both startled and excited you. You were both nervous and impatient to just have him in you already. Bucky leaned in again to press his forehead against yours again. “Tell me if I hurt you,” he mumbled, voice hoarse and gruff as he pushed his erected cock past your tight entrance. You moaned out loud as he did. He grunted once he filled you up entirely, and he gave you a couple of seconds to adjust.

“You okay, my love?” he asked again, breathless as your walls squeezed him violently. Fuck…

“Yeah…” you were just as needy as him. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders and you buried your face into the crook of his neck as you felt his body flex against yours. His back muscles felt taut and firm under your touch and his hard chest pressed down into you.

You were so full of his thick cock that even forming a proper thought seemed impossible at the moment. You shuddered as you felt all of him. His lips found yours again, attempting to get you to stay quiet while he rolled his hips against yours. Slowly at first, testing and seeing if you could take it.

You moaned as your body welcomed him in, and Bucky got his answer.

He removed himself out of you entirely and pushed himself back into you, and watched in awe how you struggled to adjust to his size. He lowered his face again, and dipped his head into the crook of your neck. You heard him panting and swearing under his breath as he rocked into you. Your nails sank into his skin, around his shoulder and muscular arm; which you held onto for dear life as he pounded into you. He slowed down occasionally, then picked up the pace again; making you lose your mind. Yes… yes…yes. All you knew was that you wanted him there, forever if you could.

You tried matching his thrusts but were unable to; so you simply let go. He kissed you, bit your skin, kissed your open mouth while he rammed into you; and you never complained once. Given his size, he stretched you out completely. And it did hurt, but the pleasure compensated for the pain.  

“I love you so much…” he mumbled against your skin. But you were unable to answer, all you did was moan and whimper and squirm as he pounded into you. Your legs trembled and he lifted them up to wrap them around his waist. This allowed him to thrust deeper into you.

Bucky growled and bit down on your shoulder to keep himself from making any louder noises while he fucked you. He was relentless, as though each moan, each mewl which left your lips only encouraged him to give you his all.

He was sweet and caring as he handled your body, caressing you and kissing you, but he was also animalistic and wild at the same time. His kisses were passionate and deep. His touch was tantalizing, and he didn’t hold back as he made love to you. And you knew you could definitely get used to this. The now familiar pressure was back again, hot and burning. You got louder and so did he.

As he pulled away and looked down at you, you saw in his eyes, the determination, the hunger and the need; matching your own. “You’re all mine.” he whispered as he made you cum again around his cock for the first time that night. Your moans were wanton as your walls clenched around his cock. You felt him fill you up again, with his warm load shooting at your walls. “Mine.” he growled and collapsed into your arms.

 At some point during the night, he took you again. This time he flipped you onto your stomach and pulled you onto your knees by your hips, your ass up in the air.

“You okay, sweetheart?” he asked again.

“Yes.” you replied almost immediately.

He kissed the back of your neck and pushed himself inside you again. You felt his hard body press against the curve of your ass as he filled you up just like he had earlier.

Bucky’s hand found its way to your front and he pressed his palm against your lower abdomen. He liked the wave of excitement which coursed through his veins each time he felt himself thrusting deep within you. He liked how he was the only one who would ever touch you like this, the only one who would own you like this, the only one who would ever fuck you like this.

You moaned at how wonderfully Bucky stretched you out and rammed his thick cock in and out of you rapidly. You felt your walls clench around him, and tightening around his thick member. The sounds leaving his lips were sinful more than anything. And it sent shivers down your spine. He panted against your cheek, kissing the side of your face lovingly.

He didn’t slow down as your walls clenched around him violently, he kept pounding into you as your eyes rolled back and you moaned out loud as you came; hard. Bucky fucked you relentlessly; not even stopping for a second. He panted and groaned at how good you felt and how perfect you felt around him.

Unable to form coherent sentences, you moaned as you felt your release approaching. Your legs were shaking, and your body moved along with his perfectly. You wanted more of what he had to give. You craved him. A rush coursed through your veins as you felt your mind clouding with lust again. He growled under his breath, his lips dangerously close to yours as you whined and whimpered under him.

You came again, walls tightening around his length. He bit down on your lip as you lifted your hips to meet his thrust; chasing your release. Your body trembled under him as you came again. You noticed his irregular thrusts and the sound which left his lips; he came right after you; filling you up yet again.

After he was done, he fell limp into your arms, careful as to not crush you beneath his body weight.

He stayed like that for a while, and let you wrap your arms around him; with his head against your bare chest. He relished the feeling of being in your arms. Until he finally rolled over and pulled you into his side, tucking your head under his chin.

“I love you.”

“I love you more.”

 ---

Days went by in pure bliss.

“Do you miss it?” Bucky asked one night, as you laid your chest on his bare chest. Both of you worn out and tired after having made love to one another for hours.

You closed your eyes and sighed, pressing your face into his warm chest. His smell, his body heat, his soft touch – it was all pure heaven. You knew he was asking about the ocean.

“I do. But I miss it like one missed their childhood.” You explained further. “The nostalgia hurts, but it’s a good kind of hurt. Take yourself for example, you will always miss your childhood; the freedom, the fun and the lack of responsibilities. Yet at the same time, now you’re grateful for what you have now and who you’ve become. You’re wiser and better and surrounded by people who love you.”

You tilted your head up and found him staring down at you, looking lovingly into your eyes. You spoke up again. “It’s the same for me. I will always miss it, I mean I was born there. But this is where I’m meant to be. With you, till my dying day.”

He rolled the two of you over and hovered above you. His long hair framing his face, making him look so handsome and angelic you could cry. “I love you.” he said, his bare body pressing down on you under the covers.

His body heat wrapped around you like a protective cocoon. “I love you more.”

 -6 YEARS LATER-

 You stood on the beach, not too far from home. You smiled as you looked around; right on this beach is where you and Bucky got married 6 years ago. It was a beautiful wedding, and the celebration even more so. You turned around and caught a glimpse of the grand fortress. Stone and concrete, sharp and rough edges but still radiating a sense of warmth and security – much like the man who had it built himself.

Your smile grew at the thought of your husband. In just six years, so much had changed. For the better.

Your little reverie was interrupted by the sound of giggles and shouts of excitement. You looked straight ahead and found your three kids running around and playing close to the water, paying little to no attention to the beautiful sunset behind them. Yes, they were human but very much skilled when it came to diving into the ocean. You often took them swimming, and they all amazed you by how well they could hold their breath under water for surprisingly a long time. They definitely got that from you. And Bucky was proud of that.

You sighed in content at the sight of your kids. They were everything to you and Bucky. Speaking of Bucky, he caught you by surprise by coming up to you and wrapping his strong arms around you from behind, nuzzling your neck.

“Hello, my love.” he mumbled against your skin. You giggled. All these years and his voice still made you weak in the knees.

“Hi.” You turned your head to the side and beamed at him. “How did the meeting go with the rest?” Bucky and his crew were planning another loot soon, and they’ve been busy preparing and discussing these past days.

He pressed a kiss to your cheek, his beard pricking your skin gently. But you had gotten used to the roughness of it, it was almost comforting now. “It was fine.” Bucky went on to give you some details about what they discussed.

Then you were both interrupted by the sound of your kids laughing and yelling in excitement. Apparently their sand castle was now complete, they’ve been working on it for hours. Bucky looked at them and a warm smile formed on his face.

“We should get these little monsters home and get them showered before dinner.” He smiled down at you. You chuckled.

“They won’t listen, and they won’t leave until their feet aren’t hurting from running around too much.” You knew your kids too well. “I’m afraid they’re just as stubborn as their father.” You added, teasing your husband.

He raised an eyebrow at you, smirking. “Are they now?” he leaned down to gently bite your partially exposed shoulder. You laughed, tipping your head back and resting it on his shoulder. He tightened his grip around you and looked down at you in pure and utter adoration and smiled. His wife, at last. The mother of his kids. Entirely his, finally.

Then as he often did, he got emotional just thinking about that night all those years ago, where he was foolish enough to think that letting you go was a good idea. He blurted out, “I’m sorry.”

You turned around in his arms and faced him. You reached up and cupped his face in your hands. “What for?”

Bucky looked down, seeing your bodies pressed together. He let out a dry chuckle. “I almost broke us apart forever that night.” he said and you knew exactly what he was talking about. “I didn’t realize I would be hurting you too. I was so stupid to even think that I would survive without you.”

He often brought it up, whenever he was sad or upset. Or when he’s had a little too much ale. He’s even cried in your arms like a child all night once when you brought it up casually. The guilt had diminished, but it was still there in him somewhere. But you had faith the one day it’ll be gone entirely. You were both working on it.

“It’s been years, Buck. Let it go. We’re here, aren’t we? We’re together and we have a family just like we always dreamt of. That’s all that matters.” You maintained his stare as you spoke. He nodded. “I love you.” you leaned in and pressed a kiss to his forehead. You pulled away and smiled, “Besides, if it weren’t for my fit of rage that day, I would’ve never found the potion. So think of it this way, we had to drift apart for a while, and it happened for a reason.”

He smiled and leaned in to press his forehead to yours. “I love you so much it hurts.” He mumbled, making you giggle. Then a thought popped into his head out of nowhere. “I never asked you this, but when you found the potion, did you drink all of it?” he had always been curious about that.

You smiled faintly, remembering the day you found it. “No.” you answered, deep in thought. “I took some, and then I put the rest right back.”

“Why?” he was intrigued. He wondered how come this conversation never came up earlier in the past years.

You pulled away and looked up at him. “I was scared. I saw it and I wondered, what if in the next life the roles are reversed? What if you’re born in the ocean and I, on land?” you chuckled, although your eyes watered a little. “I wanted there to be hope for us even then. I… I can’t imagine not finding you in the next life. Or the one after that, and the one after that.” you chuckled again. “It scares me, when I think about what if our paths don’t cross in another life?” You let the single tear fall, which Bucky caught as it ran down your cheek. “Or what if we can’t be together like this again?”

Bucky felt a weight on his chest at the sight of another tear escaping your eye. You wiped this one away quickly yourself. He couldn’t help but lean in and kiss you on the lips, a gentle, sweet kiss to remind you that he was right here and there was nothing for you to worry about.

“My little pearl…” he whispered softly as he pulled away from you. “All of you, your heart, your soul; you were made to be mine. Don’t you worry, I’ll find you in the next life as well. And the one after that, and the one after that.” His words earned him a teary smile from you. “I promise you, my love, I will always find you. And you will always end up being mine.”

You threw your arms around him tightly and pulled him in for a kiss. You felt him smile through the kiss which lightened up the mood a little. “And I promise to love you just the same each time.” You whispered against his lips.

-

Although neither one of you recalled the promise you made to each other that day on that beach; in each lifetime, you both kept your promises. Bucky kept his word, somehow he always ended up finding you. And you did the same, you loved him unconditionally each time. It didn’t matter when or where you met. Or how your story began or ended. All that mattered was that in the next life, and the one after that, and the one after that; you ended up together every single time.

Bucky had been right; you were made to be his. And him, yours.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes imagine #pirate!bucky #mermaid!reader #marvel #marvel au

[spine-buster]

peaceful easy feeling ft. b.boeser | four

A/N: This one is an emotional one.  Please be prepared.  Content warnings are below.

CONTENT WARNING: parents with disease/sickness (Parkinson’s); parent death; swearing; sex; alcohol use; lots of emotions.

                                                                *     *     *     *     *

Brock was wiping Grace’s tears as he stood in between her legs as she sat on the counter.  She had come over to his house crying after an appointment at the hospital with her dad’s neurologist.  There was no good update.  There was no bad update.  There was just an update.  “Things are progressing at the rate they’ve always been progressing,” the doctor had told her.  “We’ll see how long the pureed foods last.  He’s been doing well with that, but as you know it will have to switch as some point to tube feedings.”

“I just want so much more time with him,” Grace cried into Brock’s shoulder, clinging to his body with every limb she had.  Brock pulled her away slightly so he could look her in the eye and wipe the tears that were streaming down her face himself.  “There was still so much he wanted to do.  So much I wanted to do with him.  He—he’s accepted his fate, but it also breaks his heart.”

Brock’s heart was heavy.  He wrapped his arms around her again and held her close against his body, placing small reassuring kisses on her neck and whispering to her over and over again that everything would be okay.  In reality, the both of them knew it wouldn’t be.  Hamish was dying.  He was dying a slow death.  But both of them also knew it was exactly what Grace needed right now – to be held, to have her tears wiped away, to be told everything was going to be alright.  It was one of the things she loved most about Brock, that he always knew what to do and what to say to her.  

“I love you,” he whispered into her ear tenderly.

“I love you too, Brock,” Grace whispered back.  “I love you so much.”

As Brock stood in the kitchen with Grace’s limbs wrapped around him, he thought about his dad.  He thought about Duke holding his hand as they watched football together.  He thought about Duke sipping on water from a straw, angry that he couldn’t have a beer like his buddies around him (his buddies would eventually stop drinking beer in front of him).  He thought about helping his dad get dressed, making his bed, helping him in and out of chairs or sofas.  He thought about his dad with Coolie and Milo and how much he loved them.  

Brock started crying too.

***

“You alright dad?” Grace asked as she gripped her father’s hand, watching him as he sat down on his bed in his brand new pajamas she bought him.  He nodded his head before sitting.  “Okay, let me help you with your legs.”

She bent down in front of him, seeing that he had already lifted them off the ground before she grabbed them gently and brought them on top of the bed.  He shifted his own body further into the mattress, and she made sure to fluff up his pillows before he really set his head on them.  “There you go,” she said, grabbing at the blanket bunched up at his feet.  She brought it up and draped it over his body, making sure he was snug in his bed.  She looked down at him once more.  “Sleep tight, dad.”

He said nothing.  Instead, he grabbed her hand.  Grace looked down at him.  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Why’re you so scared, sweetheart?”

Grace almost burst into tears right then and there.  But she knew she had to stay strong for her dad, because he hated seeing her cry.  He probably wouldn’t sleep for the night if she did.  “I’m just scared for the day I’m going to wake up and you won’t be here anymore,” Grace admitted to him.  Even though the doctor’s appointment didn’t necessarily bring her any good or bad news, these thoughts had been rampant in her mind ever since.  She only ever expressed them to Brock.  Sometimes to Svea.  “I know the day has been coming since I was fourteen and I’m still not prepared for it.”

“You’re…a smart girl, Gracie,” he said.  “Even with me gone…you will…still be able to do…everything that you want to.  Dance.  Have a family.  Be a mom.”

Grace nodded her head.  “I know I will.  I just don’t know if it will be as special if you’re not here to see me do all that.  Especially become a mom.  Because you know how much I want to be a mom but it’s—you’d be the best grandpa.”

“I’ll be there.  I’ll be watching.”

That’s what got her.  Right then and there, Grace let out a sob, heavy and desperate and loud, like a hurricane had just swept through her body and had taken everything with it.  She tried to stop but it was no use.  And while she sat there on the edge of his bed sobbing, he pulled her down so her head was to his chest.  “You need to…stop worrying, Gracie,” Hamish said.  She could feel and hear his heart beating.  “I’m still here…and still breathing.  Don’t you worry.”

***

“D’you miss your parents?” Grace asked Svea one night when they were hanging out together at Elias’s apartment.  They were alone in the den while Brock and Elias played video games, and Grace was looking at all the photos Svea had of her with her older sister and parents.  There were a few of her and Elias too �� that was a given – in Vancouver or when they were awkward looking teenagers.  She got a kick out of those.  

“Of course.  Every day,” Svea nodded her head.  “Do you miss your parents being together?”

Grace shrugged her shoulders.  “They separated when I was so young – I barely remember them together.  I remember the fighting more.”

Svea hated to hear that sort of thing.  She knew Grace’s story, and Grace had talked to her about it before, but every time they did speak about it, Grace revealed just a little bit more about it.  “That must have been hard for you – to see your parents fighting.”

“Not just see – I was involved in it half the time,” Grace revealed.  “They would use me to get back at the other.  They were young and stupid and had too much money, and it made things unnecessarily complicated.  I think that’s why I want to become a mom so bad, you know?  Because even though I know my parents loved me, I just want to give them a better childhood experience than what I had between my parents.”

“You want them to know mom and dad love each other,” Svea nodded.

“Exactly,” Grace stressed.  “And I want, like, a big family.  I want my kids to be able to have each other, you know?  That whole time I was so alone.  I had my friends at school but I never had a sibling.  Nobody really understood.”

Svea could only imagine.  It was at that moment she realized how lucky she was that she knew her parents loved each other.  Love was complicated, yes, but they loved each other.  Her mother moved from Vancouver to a tiny town in Sweden to be with her father – that was love.  “I think you’ve found what you need in Brock, you know,” Svea said matter-of-factly.

“I know I have,” Grace nodded her head, smiling slightly.  “I’m a very lucky girl.”

“He’s a very lucky guy,” Svea quipped.

Grace couldn’t help but giggle.  “So is Elias,” she retorted, causing Svea to blush.  “When the hell are you going to marry him, Svea?  That boy is head over heels in love with you.”

Svea shook her head.  “He’s my best friend, Grace.”

***

“I love you so much,” Grace whispered as Brock bent down to kiss her, his travel-day suit already on, and a beanie on his head covering the hair Grace loved so much.  She loved running her fingers through it, especially while in bed, and the best part was that Brock loved her doing it too, so she did it all the time.  

“I love you too,” Brock replied after the kiss.  “What are you gonna get up to for these two weeks I’m not here?”

“A lot of masturbating while I think about you.”

Brock groaned, burying his head into the crook of her neck as she giggled.  He bit down at the skin of her neck and she yelped.  “You better fucking call me when you do,” he growled in her ear.

“I will.”

Brock gave her one last kiss before standing up straight again.  “Say hello to your dad,” he said, even though he just saw him yesterday for their weekly Sunday Night Football watching.  “Tell him I’m sorry about Sunday, but I’ll make it up to him when I win our Superbowl bet.”

Grace smiled.  “He’ll be crushed if he loses that bet.”

“He better start preparing.”

***

“When are you gonna just kiss her?!” Brock was exasperated.

“Shut up,” Elias mumbled, still concentrating on his phone as he typed a message to Svea.  

“Petey, no other girls exist in, like, your world besides Svea.  Can you just get it fucking done already?”

“Brock, shut up.”

“Uuuuuuuuaaaaarrrrggghhhhh!” Brock groaned loudly as he and Elias walked through the front doors of their hotel.  “I’m gonna kill you.”

“Go right ahead.”

Brock rolled his eyes.  Before he could say anything else, his phone began ringing from his pocket.  It was after the game, and judging by their routine now, he knew it was Grace.  He actually wondered if she was with Svea watching.  “There you are.  I was wondering when I’d get a call from you,” he said cheerily, not bothering with formalities.

He was met with silence on the other end.  Then, a sniffle.  She didn’t respond.  He could hear her breathing and sniffling on the other end, but she wasn’t saying anything.  “Grace?”

“Brock…he’s gone.”

Brock’s heart fell into the pit of his stomach.  He stopped walking and stood in the middle of the foyer, the world standing still around him.  He barely registered Elias stopping when he realized Brock wasn’t walking beside him anymore, and barely registered Elias looking over his shoulder with furrowed brows.  “Grace—”

“We were at the hospital.  He—he caught pneumonia somehow and it just—it just—”

“I’m on my way home right now,” Brock said quickly.  

“Brock—”

“I’m gonna get on the first flight out to Vancouver, I promise you.  I’m just at the hotel and I’m gonna pack and leave,” he explained.

“Please hurry,” her voice was desperate, full of sadness and grief.  

“I’m on my way.  I love you,” he said.

“I love you too, Brock.  Please hurry.”

When Brock hung up the phone, he finally noticed Elias staring at him.  There were so, so many thoughts running through Brock’s mind – how he was going to tell Travis he wasn’t going to take the team charter flight home, how he was going to get to the airport, how he was going to get to Grace’s dad’s house or the hospital or wherever she was – but he was only able to verbalize one.   “I need you to call Svea and tell her to get in touch with Grace.”

“What happened?” Elias asked.

“Her dad just died.”

Elias’s eyes bulged out of their sockets.  But he immediately brought his phone up and swiped until he got Svea’s number.  “Go,” he urged, bringing his phone up to his ear.  “I’ll pack your things.  I’ll bring your bag.  Just grab your passport and go.”

***

Hamish’s viewing was busy.  He was a well-known figure in Vancouver, and so Grace had to host two days’ worth of viewings, with timeslots in the afternoon and evening.  Grace stood first, her two uncles (Hamish’s brothers and partners in the investment firm) Robbie and Owen Gillespie and their families after her.  Eliza, James, Jasper, and Theo sat alone in the third row – obviously not part of the “line”, but there to support Grace.  Hamish was Eliza’s ex-husband, after all, regardless of how nasty and bitter it got.  And he was her daughter’s father.  Brock sat alone in the second row, directly behind Grace.  Elias and Svea, when they were there – which was most of the time – were beside him, attending to Grace’s every need.  

The people wouldn’t stop coming.  There was constantly a line to pay respects and then greet Grace, Robbie, and Owen.  Brock could tell it was making Grace tired, greeting people she barely knew and shaking their hand and thanking them for their condolences.  It didn’t help that it was in the newspaper and on the night-time news, too – however brief the mention of it was, it still made more people aware, and Brock was sure they showed up even though they probably hadn’t seen Grace or Hamish in years.

The funeral was even worse.  Grace couldn’t stop crying.  She said her eulogy, and it was beautiful, and Owen said one too, but after that it was just constant tears.  After the church service, she clung to Brock, pulling him into the procession.  At the entombment, her cries were loud and continual.  Elias and Svea were crying at the final prayer before his casket was sealed.  

Brock tried to be strong – for Grace, of course – but he cried, too.

***

It was a few days – almost a week, really – until Brock saw Grace again.  There had to be meetings with lawyers and her uncles that Brock had no reason attending.  The money was already hers – everything was basically just a formality, as he understood it, like an official transfer over – but Brock knew she didn’t care about the money.  Grace wanted her dad.

Brock had barely sat down on the couch before she climbed onto his lap.  Her lips immediately found his and her tongue immediately slipped into his throat.  It was urgent.  It was hasty.  It was visceral, at least for Grace.

It was also wrong.

“Grace…” Brock mumbled, pulling away.

“Brock, c’mon,” she urged, continuing to kiss his strong jawline even though he turned away.  “I need you.  Touch me.”

“Grace—”

“Touch me,” she begged, grabbing his hands and leading them up her shirt.  

“Grace, no,” he said sternly, pulling his hands away now too.

She furrowed her brows at him, an obvious look of anger on her face at his denial.  Despite him knowing it was the right thing to do, Grace didn’t think so.  “You don’t want me?” she asked in a harsh tone.

“You know I want you.  I want you all the God damn time.  But I’m not gonna do it when you’re…emotionally compromised,” he tried to reason with her, even though he knew it would be a futile attempt.  “You don’t want this.”

“Yes I do.”

“No you don’t.  You just want to feel something right now.”

She looked at him indignantly.  “Fuck you, Brock Boeser,” she growled as she lifted herself off of his lap, grabbing her purse and slamming his front door without saying another word.  

***

There was a light knock at his door.  Brock knew it could only be one person.

When he opened it, he knew Grace would be standing on the other side.  What he wasn’t expecting was how she looked.  Hair that looked that it hadn’t been washed since the last time she was over.  Wearing clothes she’d obviously been wearing for days.  Dark circles under her eyes, which were puffy and red like they hadn’t stopped crying.  She looked defeat, frail, and crushed into a million different pieces Brock just wanted to pick up and piece together again.

“I’m sorry,” were the first words out of her mouth – practically squeaked out.  He wondered if she had a voice left.  Within seconds, he could see tears well in her eyes and spill down her cheeks like a flood.  “I just…I miss his more than my heart knows how to handle.”

Brock engulfed her in a hug, and she cried and cried and cried.

***

“I was in the hospital with him…and he was weak, but he could still speak a bit, and move too.  And I was holding his hand the entire time.  And I just wanted to be in bed with him like when I was a kid and had a nightmare.  And when I got in, I—well, when I was a kid, he’d hold me against his chest and I always remember how I could feel his heart beating, so I did that.  And he held my hand and before he fell asleep, he said ‘I love you Gracie.  I’ll be there.  I’ll be watching.’  And then that was it.”

Brock felt a tear escape his eye.  He let it fall as he began to shift his and Grace’s body’s so that he was lying on top of him, her head on his chest.  He felt her hand clutch at his bare skin briefly, and a wetness on his chest he knew were tears.  “Can you feel it?” he asked, referring to his heartbeat.

Grace nodded her head.  “Stay like this, please.”

Brock didn’t move an inch the entire night.

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