#not wanting kids | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

timelhess · 1 year

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Let's normalize not wanting any kids.

Let’s normalize not wanting to be a parent.

Let’s stop making women feel like that is their only purpose in life.

Let’s stop telling women that it’s just a phase and that they’ll “change their mind”.

Let’s stop demanding reasons from women who say they don’t want kids.

Let's normalize living our lives the way we want to, not how society tells us to.

Photo credit: twitter.com/the_female_lead

#society #justice #women #women's rights #feminism #motherhood #childless #freedom #not wanting kids #upload

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chrollohearttags · 5 months

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went down the rabbit hole on YouTube of other black ppl who are aromantics, virgins, never dated, etc. and I’m sitting here cheesing so hard bc I’ve never felt so validated. Like it’s not something I’ve ever felt ashamed or bad about and I’ve never had the desire to lose the ‘v card’ or be in a relationship but I feel like sometimes it’s hard to talk to other people about who aren’t and it’s just reaaaally nice to see other people that look like you sharing the same experience.

#I was watching a mommy blogger expose vid #and now we’re here #but it’s so nice to feel validated in ur experience #cherry chats 🍒#aromantic #lgbtqia #like it gets hard when you have friends who talk about dating and sex and you can’t really relate to them #the main reason I don’t talk to many of my gfs anymore bc they’re in relationships and one’s pregnant #and I don’t have much to say #sexuality discussion #cw sexuality #they described everything I was feeling too #not wanting kids #not wanting to be married #and even not wanting to be touched

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inkedcitruses · 11 months

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How to uninstall uterus

#he/they in my bio but it still does this to me #its my month ueue #art #uterus is useless to me pleaseeeee i have ages long decided in #not wanting kids #and my mind wont change #so i dont wanna hear the bs of #‘ you never know op ‘

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katimorton · 11 months

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I get the question a lot, are you having a baby? Or when are you and Sean planning for a baby? Or are you not going to have a baby? Long story short, I will make my own decisions and shouldn't be pressured into thinking I should act or behave or live my life how someone else thinks I should. The reality is we can feel a lot of pressure about having a baby or kids - whether that be from society or from our mom or our dad or our friends. They think, oh so you're married and you've been together a long time, now you must have kids or you must have a baby. And there's this pressure that just because you're married it means that the next step is to have a baby - but not everyone wants the same things from this life, and not all of us are designed to have this "perfect life" that includes marriage, kids, white picket fence - and our idea of perfect life may look very different. Or maybe some of us had such horrible childhood experiences or trauma and had such a rough childhood, that the thought of that happening to another child may be scary for us. There are so many reasons a couple or an individual person can choose not to have kids. And also, some people cannot have kids because their bodies won't allow and it's not physically possible - and that can bring up a slew of emotions for that person if they're asked. So let's normalize not asking people about when they're having a baby or if they're having a baby or why they don't want kids - if someone wants to have a baby or is trying to have kids and they want you to know, they will tell you. You don't have to ask them. Have you ever been asked about having kids or a baby when you don't want one? How did you respond?

My new LIVE attachment workshop is coming in July! You can pre-order the prerecorded version or attend the live event here: https://katimorton.com/the-shop/p/att... (pre-recorded version coming!)

#parenting #marriage #having kids #having a baby #mental health #relationship #not wanting kids #pressure #pressure to have kids #Youtube

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mycptsdstory · 1 year

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THANK YOU!! I love this

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doccywhomst · 4 months

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#i’ve been thinking abt that cringe post #i think the latent feelings behind ‘cringe’ are shame and sometimes envy/bitterness #same vibes as when six year olds say ‘those toys are for babies’ if they’ve been shamed for their age by older kids #anyway. i think part of the healing process is realizing that shame puts you at war with yourself bc part of yourself is a social being!#and that part of you wants community and acceptance (maybe love). shame is the absence of acceptance #unlearning shame means learning self-love and gaining the confidence to find your people #jerma #cw jerma #(someone asked me to tag lol)

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lesbian-disaster-academic · 6 months

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i used to be so good at writing strong, thoroughly-researched, thoroughly-edited essays.

as a kid in hs, my teacher literally came up to me, holding my 40 page essay on the intersection of the European witch hunts and capitalism/exploitation/gender roles (it was supposed to be 7 pages...whoops) and went like "this is literally a master's-degree level thesis. what are you doing?? you could literally use this as your final dissertation in a master's program, what the fuck."

NOW??? NOW?? you'd think I'd be oh so skilled. but alas. i can barely piece together two ideas. adhd skill-regression is so so real. im SOBBING

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ardri-na-bpiteog · 2 months

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Also increasingly aware that a LOT of people "manage" getting through the 40+ hour work week by sleeping less than is healthy and relying on stimulants like coffee and energy drinks to keep them going.

For people who are unwilling or unable to do this...work really does just dominate your life. Like we really should not have to rely on unhealthy practices just to have a social life or keep on top of housework or whatever.

I know I post about this a lot but I'm so TIRED all the time and it's just so depressing that this is how we're expected to spend the one life we have.

#i have to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night to even barely function #with sleep #getting ready for work #commute #cooking #and errands #I typically have maybe 2-3 hours to actually do what i want in a day #and I'm usually too tired to actually do the things i want to do #and that's with a very short commute #if i actually had a long commute I'd basically do nothing but work #i see my friends like once every few weeks or months #because we're all so fucking busy with work and have such little time for socialising #and none of us even have kids or anything!!

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drmajalis · 11 months

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Too good to stay on twitter

#parenting #don't have kids if you don't want queer and trans kids

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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 8 months

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Of the 19 hijackers who carried out the Sept 11 attacks:

15 were from Saudi Arabia (a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)

2 were from the United Arab Emirates (also a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)

1 was from Egypt, 1 from Lebanon.

None of the hijackers were from Iraq.

None of the Sept 11 hijackers were Iraqi.

None of the 9/11 hijackers were from Iraq.

#9/11 #serious post #not a shitpost #this should be one of the first things kids learn when they learn about the 9/11 attacks #politics #this is just...it's such an essential and brazen fact and i rarely see basic outrage over it #i want outrage. i want fury. i want disgust over the way fundamental facts are disguised and discarded and downplayed #because there are things we should KNOW. basic fact we should ALL KNOW. and they are tucked away in the footnotes.#and no this is NOT to put the blame on other middle eastern countries #we know this was carried out by a specific terrorist organization not a national government #but King George the Second decided (and was encouraged by his cabinet!) to invade a nation!#a nation that was not at all related or responsible!!!#a dictatorship to be sure--but a dictatorship that King George the First had been happy to support #so what changed? why did we go in guns blazing to DEMOLISH a country *we had NO PLANS OF REPAIRING*???#well. because they wanted a villain didn't they. a nice clean war. clarity of purpose. us the heroes against them the villains #and when you're in that mindframe--truth is irrelevant. you can pick your villain (your victim) by rolling a roulette wheel #truth is irrelevant #worse: to the people in charge #truth is a HINDRANCE #'Alternative facts' existed long before it became a catchphrase #facts don't matter. truth doesn't matter. the impulses of a handful of volatile & rich & power-high people--that's History. congratulations

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wewontbesleeping · 1 month

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the weirdest fucking thing to me is how men will be like "it's so hard being a man. no one cares that i'm sad. the loneliness we experience could NEVER be understood by a woman" and then also be like "btw i never talk to my friends and i don't know their names and i love hanging out with men because they don't talk about their stupid emotions all the time. women could never understand a bond like this." like ???

#this thread was so rancid lmfao #my favorite was 'we don't care if someone wants to relax on the couch!!! STOP NAGGING US!!!' like ????#go take care of your kids you deadbeat????#also SO many guys complaining that no one compliments them #ok so compliment another man.....#oh no you only want a woman to compliment you? ok.#women compliment each other that's why we get compliments lol #we do not want men to 'compliment' us hope this helps

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laughingcatwrites · 5 months

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As a reminder that good exists out there, a coworker recently confessed to me that he found out his child is questioning their identity (kid's gender redacted for this post). The kid is keeping it from him, so he can't say anything to them or show that he knows, but he's doing his best to get mentally prepared and educated so that he'll be ready whenever his kid does feel comfortable enough come to him.

For context, this guy is a big, bulky middle aged dude who loves sports and typical outdoor "manly" activities. As his coworker and friend, I know he's a kind and sweet teddy bear of a person, but his kid probably views him as a stern, authoritarian figure, the way most teenagers view their parents. His family lives in a conservative area, so I'm sure between that, their dad's looks and interests, and the fact that their dad is a Figure of Authority, the kid is worried that they won't be accepted.

But you know what? When he found out about his kid, the first thing he did was reach out to his closest queer friend and ask for resources for parents of questioning children. His biggest fears are that his kid will be bullied or discriminated against and won't feel comfortable enough to be themself. His second action was to find himself a mentor in another parent who went the same situation (kid coming out in a conservative town). The other person is preparing him for some of the struggles his kid may face and the fights he may need to take on as a parent to make sure his kid is safe and treated well.

Something I want to emphasize for people focused on language as the primary method of allyship is that when we spoke, he used some outdated terms and thoughts about gender and sexuality. That does not make him bad. These were the terms and thinking used about questioning teenagers when he was growing up and he never needed to learn more current ones. But now that he does have that need, he's throwing himself in head first because that's his kid and he's darn well going to make sure that his kid feels welcomed and has a safe place to be themselves even if they never come out to him.

#I'm so proud and happy for my coworker and I've been trying to figure out how to let him know how amazing I think he is #what gets me the most is that he's keeping this super down low to avoid giving any hints to his kid #he has a lot of queer friends so he already is known as an ally but there's always a chance it will be different if it's family #and he took that chance and crumpled it up into a ball and slam dunked it into the garbage for three points #and decided that even if his kid wants to hide it from him for the rest of his life he will still do what he can to make their life better #pflag #parents doing their best #parenting win #good news #allyship

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redsray · 2 months

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the funniest part of any Robin meeting the JL is that every Robin is so distinctly different from the previous one in terms of personality and vibes that the league literally gets backlash. and like, I don't blame them. not to mention that they are non-meta children that dress as a traffic light and fight crime alongside batman in gotham on a nightly basis. i'd also be a bit concerned. Batman, literally The Night of Gotham personified in the League's eyes, coming into a JL meeting: This is Robin, my crime-fighting partner. 11-year-old Dick Grayson, dressed in the brightest primary colours possible, vaguely hidden murder behind those eyes, never stops moving even for a moment: Hi! Superman: That's a child. That's-- Bats that is a child. You let a child--? Batman, deadpan: You try to stop him. Would you rather he try and murder a grown man with a wire?

Batman: This is Robin. 12-year-old Jason Todd, with the biggest grin on his face, about 3 books in his hand, stars in his eyes and a distinct street-kid drawl: Hey!!! Green Lantern: That's ... that's a different child. What?? Jason: I stole his tires :) Batman: Tried to. Jason, stage whispering to the League: basically did. Green Lantern: that is a different kid, right?? I'm not seeing shit??

Batman: This is Robin. 14-year-old Tim Drake, bo staff clutched in his hand, a wary and tired expression on his face, more on the quiet side, the literal walking definition of don't judge a book by it's cover: hello Flash: Where do you even find these-- Tim: I found myself.

Batman: This is Robin. 17-year-old Stephanie Brown, literally blonde, with a shit-eating grin, eyes full of nothing but mischief and the most explosive personality you've ever seen: hiya!! Superman: I give up. Stephanie: I know, I have that amazing effect on people.

Batman: This is Robin. 13-year-old Damian Wayne, a literal wet cat that will hiss at you, has a sword, the most judgemental stare you'll get from a teenager, ready to jump anyone there: Green Lantern: WHY DOES HE HAVE A SWORD?! Batman: ... he came with the sword.

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elodieunderglass · 7 months

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changes and trends in horror-genre films are linked to the anxieties of the culture in its time and place. Vampires are the manifestation of grappling with sexuality; aliens, of foreign influence. Horror from the Cold War is about apathy and annihilation; classic Japanese horror is characterised by “nature’s revenge”; psychological horror plays with anxieties that absorbed its audience, like pregnancy/abortion, mental illness, femininity. Some horror presses on the bruise of being trapped in a situation with upsetting tasks to complete, especially ones that compromise you as a person - reflecting the horrors and anxieties of capitalism etc etc etc. Cosmic horror is slightly out of fashion because our culture is more comfortable with, even wistful for, “the unknown.” Monster horror now has to be aware of itself, as a contingent of people now live in the freedom and comfort of saying “I would willingly, gladly, even preferentially fuck that monster.” But I don’t know much about films or genres: that ground has been covered by cleverer people.

I don’t actually like horror or movies. What interests me at the moment is how horror of the 2020s has an element of perception and paying attention.

Multiple movies in one year discussed monsters that killed you if you perceived them. There are monsters you can’t look at; monsters that kill you instantly if you get their attention. Monsters where you have to be silent, look down, hold still: pray that they pass over you. M Zombies have changed from a hand-waved virus that covers extras in splashy gore, to insidious spores. A disaster film is called Don’t Look Up, a horror film is called Nope. Even trashy nun horror sets up strange premises of keeping your eyes fixed on something as the devil GETS you.

No idea if this is anything. (I haven’t seen any of these things because, unfortunately, I hate them.) Someone who understands better than me could say something clever here, and I hope they do.

But the thing I’m thinking about is what this will look like to the future, as the Victorian sex vampires and Cold War anxieties look to us. I think they’ll have a little sympathy, but they probably won’t. You poor little prey animals, the kids will say, you were awfully afraid of facing up to things, weren’t you?

#this is the sort of observation I make here that people #go off and write their thesis about #so while I’m not expecting to be the first or cleverest person to say this #if you do use it as a springboard #tell me if you get a good grade ok?#I’ll be tremendously proud of you #like if you take a shitpost and use it to craft deep attentive thought on something important #I just think that’s probably the most noble use of a human brain #it makes me want to take off my hat and slam it to the ground in inexpressible emotion #it’s a cowboy hat btw #and I say something like GOLDURN IT THAT KID SURE HAS DELIVERED.#ok so don’t deny me this #especially if you correct me after a long research journey #GOLDURN IT THE KID IS RIGHT!

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platyroonism · 2 months

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but if I'M a traumatized kid and YOU'RE a traumatized kid... who's playing the game!?

#frisk #chara #undertale #i just think the player as some kind of eldritch entity would be sooooo funny. the eldritch god capable of deleting everything #wants to smooch a ghost #also i'm not really a subscriber of 'demon chara' theory/canon #like thematically they DO represent the player or whatever #but also #.... they are just a silly kid :)#who likes chocolate :)#plart

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greelin · 8 months

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idk man being violently hateful/resentful towards children for existing is weird. it’s legitimately just weird.

#‘i don’t want kids!!!’ that’s great. you can still be normal and patient with others though. like a sensible person

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