#nah dude I'm just fat

[running-in-the-dark]

went somewhere with my husband and his dad today (to pick up my in-laws' "new" camper van). the guys that were selling it had a baby with them and it was so freaking adorable. so I kept making silly faces and hiding for a few seconds and that kind of stuff to make the baby laugh (it was fun!). anyway, after a while one of the guys asked when my husband and I are having kids and I just went like oh never. we have two cats, that's enough, and most babies aren't as cute as that one anyway so nope not interested in that.

#there's a possibility with the way that the initial question was phrased that he might have thought I was pregnant #nah dude I'm just fat #but I just ignored that possibility and it was fine! #I don't think I've ever had anyone outright assume that I'm pregnant and I would have expected it to feel really bad #but it was just fine! I'm fat and my stomach is big and I look like a woman and apparently playing with a baby means you want kids so I can #kinda see the logic #and anyway it was ambivalent enough that he might really just have meant it in general #they were really nice so I'm just going to assume that :) #I think I would have handled that totally differently before (mostly before the anxiety meds really) #it would have felt awful then - just the thought that he MIGHT have meant that #and now it's just a funny thing that happened and that I feel completely okay about :) #(and that baby really was ridiculously adorable! I don't like babies in general but ugh it was so cute) #also I think I handled like the whole day really really well!! I suggested things and asked questions and didn't feel uncomfortable at any #point!! #we went to McDonald's and that's something that was completely overwhelming for me before #now... I didn't even think about it!! we just went there! we went inside I did a lot of things that would have been hard before and it was #just fine! #I just felt like. I'm allowed to exist. I'm allowed to be here. I'm not in the way I'm not wrong I'm not bad #it all just happened and there was no anxiety no panic no awful thoughts. I wasn't afraid at any point. not even a little. #(I think. it's hard to remember now but I think that's a good sign too!) #personal #anxiety meds my beloved

[tgcg]

we do a bit of trolling

CG: OKAY DAVE, I KNOW WE CAME TO A TRUCE ON THE WHOLE FOOD WARS SHTICK, I'M NOT ABOUT TO HURL TWENTY MORE INSULTS AT YOUR EARTH CUISINE, BUT.

CG: BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT.

TG: man

TG: ok look i was kinda preoccupied with the seven minute voice message i left you about the infinite jump glitch in sonic 06 and it turns out i cant measure water and talk at the same time

CG: DON'T SLOSH IT!!! THAT'S DISGUSTING!!! IT LOOKS LIKE BILE!

TG: yeah well its the last pack of mac n sheese and im gonna eat it whatever viscosity it decides to have

TG: i can make this work

TG: is cheese soup a thing

TG: nah theres no way in hell

TG: k so what is your cooking proficiency like what are we dealing with here

CG: OH, I DON'T KNOW. I WOULD SAY I CAN PROBABLY FOLLOW BASIC INSTRUCTIONS, POSSIBLY LIKE THE ONES THAT WERE ON THE BACK OF YOUR SALIVATION-INDUCING SLOPFEST YOU'VE GOT GOING ON HERE.

TG: alright cool i got a pitch

TG: might work might dont

CG: THAT ISN'T SO MUCH INSPIRING CONFIDENCE IN ME AS IT IS TAKING WHAT MORSELS OF FAITH I HAD IN YOU OUT BACK AND THRASHING THEM IN A DARK ALLEYWAY.

TG: alright so im basing my operations on like the core features of water im talking the ten commandments of h2o-logy

TG: as the component responsible for the shlop of my shlock presented before you

TG: it can evaporate right

CG: … YEAH?

TG: ok but cheese doesnt evaporate does it you cant get a cheese mist

CG: OH NO.

TG: cheese doesnt evaporate it just like melts

TG: or dries

TG: so my theory is if i jam this shit in an oven or maybe the microwave

CG: NEITHER OF THOSE WERE IN THE INSTRUCTIONS AND YOU KNOW IT

TG: but the problem is the pasta is already cooked and all up in there so if i microwave it the pastas gonna go soggy and i cant have that

CG: DAVE.

TG: so microwave is out of the picture im assuming oven heat will keep the pasta dry while also evaporatin the water without removing the cheese

TG: that checks out doesnt it

CG: CUT THE BULLSHIT. STOP EMBARRASSING YOURSELF.

CG: YOUR INSISTENCE ON UPSTAGING YOUR OWN STUPIDITY IN FRONT OF ME ISN'T CUTE OR ENDEARING. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO PULL AND I'M NOT FA--

CG:

CG: WAIT… NO… WOULD-- WOULD THAT…?

TG: real brain wrinkler huh

CG: OH SUCK MY FAT FUCKING SHAME GLOBES

TG: dude you even pointed out the tripwire and you still went ahead and threw yourself over it what kind of troll are you

CG: I DIDN'T FALL FOR SHIT! OBVIOUSLY MY ATTEMPT TO HUMOR YOUR RAPIDLY DETERIORATING SENSE OF "INTELLIGENCE" WENT CLEAN OVER YOUR NUGBONE! YOU'VE PROVEN YOUR POINT, MY FAITH IN YOU IS COMPLETELY MISPLACED.

CG: WOOPS! SILLY ME FOR BELIEVING IN YOU! WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER?

TG: hahahaha oh man

#davekat #dave strider #karkat vantas #homestuck #inspired by the iasip binge i been on lately #comix #we do a bit of trolling

[z0mb13-b0y-m4t30]

LUCIFER X DOM READER (reader has a cock)

Hello pervs, it's been a fat second since I've really posted anything. Which I hope I've gotten slightly better since than - reading my slightly older posts on here are so messy and disorganized.

So I've resorted to porn without much plot (pwmp) I think I'll start doing this more often than not because im not the greatest at storyline writing. Unfortunately I've been hooked on this godforsaken app for 2 days straight and I'm motivated as FUCK rn, so let's do this.

You

Lucifer

CW; Dom reader, reader has a dick/strap-on, Lucifers a whiney little bitch, nipple play, readers kind of sadistic(?), choking, belly bulge, size kink, creampie, petnames, lucifers kinda Pervy, degrading, readers kinda Pervy too.

🍎✨

You've been apart of the hazbin hotels staff for awhile now, being with her since the beginning, so finding out she decided to have to dad come over for the first time was a bit confusing - since when did he have time for her?

The whole entrance of her father was a bit dramatic and over the top as a whole musically charged argument between Lucifer and alastor happened.

Although...while Lucifer was here you couldn't help but notice him sneaking glances at you, his eyes wondering over your body without shame, you've caught him looking below your belt a few times, not complaining though, having a dilf check you out wasn't a bad thing, you couldn't help but wonder a few things.. like him on his knees sucking your big cock while he chokes on it, with teary eyes, knowing he's getting off on it aswell.

Through Lucifers eyes - he couldn't stop looking at you, you were so much more taller than him, the fact you tower and loom over him...fuck it turned him on so much. Just knowing you could pick him up and use him as a toy for your own pleasures made it all the more exhilarating.. although his pride and stubbornness would never allow him to admit that out loud...but he just couldn't help but to wonder how'd it feel to be underneath you while you fuck him dumb.

Speaking of him looking at you..you were sleeping in your bed, you lived in the hotel as well as the other staff. You kept waking up with a paranoid feeling but you shrugged it off as you couldn't care less, this was hell, your always being watched by your past mistakes anyways. But..no, it was him, Lucifer, watching you through the crack in the door, his red pupil being barely visible as he gently opened the door.

He quietly entered the room as he locked the door behind him with a small ‘click’. He sauntered to the side of your bed as he stared down at you with a lidded look. He had a wet dream about you..of course he did..he's a dirty whore who hasn't had sex in a while..let alone with a guy so when he felt himself lusting after you..he needed to fill that need. He gently palmed himself through his pants as he stared down at your sleeping form, soft grunts and moans left his pump lips as his cheeks flushed slightly.

Just then you blinked a few times as you slowly woke up, feeling paranoid once again, Lucifer on the other hand swiftly moved his hand away from himself as he just stood there. You looked up at him as you raised an eyebrow, his flushed face and glazed over eyes caused you confusion.

"Dude- what the hell are you doing?? It's like 4am." You glared tiredly at him as you weren't really shocked..just confused if Anything. What's this twink doing in YOUR room this late?

Lucifer flinched a bit as his usual wide grinned masked his embarrassment - he then replied in a slightly sheepish tone, "I just ..wanted to check up on you..make sure your doing okay and all..is it so bad i wanted to check in on my .. favorite guy ever?"

He played it off in a friendly tone as he sat on the edge of the bed, looking down at you, his eyes never leaving your as you sat up in bed..that made his eyes leave yours, is gaze followed down to your exposed chest as the blanket slid down your torso, the thin blanket covering your lap and leaving a soft outline of your dick, why should you care? Your dick pics are surrounding the Internet (by choice) and plus! It's late, your tired.

He bit his lip as he shamelessly stared at that outline before he snapped his gaze back up to yours, you raised a disbelieving eyebrow at him and rolled your eyes, "seriously? I have a hard time believing that, what do you actually want."

Lucifer realized this wouldn't go anywhere unless he initiated it, he put his hand on your cheek and leaned in just a bit, "..I've been .. watching you and thinking about you..I had a dream about you and all..I just wanted to see you." He answered truthfully but his trembling tone made you believe there was more than just an innocent dream that made him wanna see you.

"Really hm? What typa' dream? Wet dream?" Your eyebrows raised in amusement as you felt more awake, a small smirk made a way to your lips as you stared at him expectantly, you knew you were right, your not an idiot - you can tell who's being a horny fuck underneath.

A small blush crept onto his face as he chuckled gently, his hand still on your cheek as he mumbled a small, “Maybe…” His eyes were starting to roam around the room, checking everything from his side as if he was thinking of something. “..You do look ..tempting, you know.”

His finger hooked around the thin blanket covering your lap as he went to pull his down just a bit to tease himself like the masochistic bitch he is. His face flushed once more as your felt yourself getting aroused by this sudden advancement.. Lucifer couldn't help but wonder how you'd feel inside him, hitting his prostate and making him cum an unholy amount of times...god that made his dick twitch as he looked back into your eyes,

"I..I need you so bad."

That's how you got here. He's underneath you as you kiss his jawline, your lips trailing down to his neck as you bit into his soft flesh, leaving a mark as you did so, he let out a moan that made your dick twitch so good,

"A-Ahh! Oh Fuck your gonna-..I'm gonna oh- please..no..no more teasing please..ohgodohgod.."

you couldn't help but feel the need to ruin him. Your fingers gently pinched his nipple before your lips trailed down his collarbone to his chest as your tongue swirled around his sensitive nipple - earning a moan from him.

"Pleaseplease! sir..I need you so so bad..please...AH- oh fuck!" He whined, his back arched as you bit down gently on his sensitive bud, it caught him off guard as your hand trailed down to his boxers, your finger hooked around his waistband before pulling back and letting go - letting it snap against his hip, a sharp hiss left his lips as he felt that slight pain. "Please! Oh god I think- I think I'm gonna-"

You smirked at him approaching his orgasm just from some touches from your tongue and hands.

"no no.. sweetheart, were just getting started and your already so riled up.." You smirked as your eyes lidded into a smug grin, "Look at you.. already a mess underneath me..I'll be sure to punish you for sneaking into my room all because of some dirty fantasy you had of me..how perverted of you, luci."

Lucifer groans softly as his dick twitched uncontrollably just from your words and sexy voice..he was so turned on, “please... Stop. Don't... I'll do anything, just please-please! Oh fuckfuck.....” Everything you're giving is making him crazy. He is losing control every second.

“Y-You're making me crazy....”

Your smirk widened almost sadistically as you tilted your head, "awe..look at you, baby...how pathetic." You grinned down at him, you wanted to make him cry and loose his mind, "Crazy.. already? Your so sensitive..at this rate you'll be a blubbering incoherent mess the time I'm done with you."

Lucifer groans as he clutches your poor sheets tightly. The way you're making him feel, oh boy it's too much! He feels himself hanging on by a thread and you've only just started. "Please... I'm barely hanging on, just give me a break." He breathes heavily as all of those kisses and bites are making him crazy, and all he can do are these pathetic whines.

"hmmm no..now that wouldn't be too fun..now would it?" You ripped his boxers off almost immediately, you were already naked and now he was too, god he looks so pretty so needy..his bruised porcelain skin making it hard for you to hold back. "God your so pathetic.. its like you want me to overstimulate you like the whore you are."

Lucifer's body shuddered at the touch. Oh, this is just unbelievable. He was actually getting desperate for you now. You could tell he was at his breaking point. Lucifer was breathing heavily from all the arousal and the pleasure you were giving him, as he was unable to say a single word.

"I... i-i Can't... Take... It.. Anymore..please sir I need you..I need you in me so so..deep."

Please let me cum in you..was all you could think, you absolutely need to be in him but your holding back for the sake of teasing him, "Hmm? And who came into my room? Who made the first move?~ can't back out now Sweetheart..you know you want me to use you like a toy..I see the way you look at me like the pervert you are.."

Lucifer is breathing heavily. Every single move you're making is driving him crazy, he is a total mess right now, and he is loving every single second of it. "You... don't... understand... What... you're... doing... t'me... Please.." His hands grip the sheets tightly almost ripping them as he tries so hard to be in control but this feels good, way too good.

"good boy-.." you spit on your middle finger and pointer finger as you went to prep him but before you did, your eyebrows raised in slight amusement and surprise, your smirk widened as you held his hip and thigh so he couldn't squirm away from you, "..did you already prep yourself? ..Did you expect me to do this too you, slut?"

Lucifer's cheeks turned even brighter red at that revelation. He couldn't speak as he continued to squirm, his breathing was heavy, but he wasn't struggling anymore. His body was letting all of these feelings flow through. Lucifer's whole body was twitching slightly, as his whole body was so close to being overwhelmed. He bit his lip once again, he was trying so hard... "Yes... I did expect.."

"god your really a slut for me, huh." Your grip on him tightened as your smirk widened, your eyes narrowed as he looked down at you..that pleading look in his teary eyes turned you on beyond belief,

"You think you can handle me?"

"I.... I-I think I can, b-but..." He moaned and whined as his mind was absolutely overwhelmed, as you had now completely taken control over him. Lucifer was now fully under your grasp and there was nothing he can do about it. He was yours and all yours to claim. "I.. Will be a good... Slut... For you..."

Your hand snaked up his torso as you wrapped your hand around his throat, applying a bit of pressure as his breath hitched, a jolt went through his whole body as you applied that pressure to his throat. His breathing became more shallow as his heart was pounding in his chest.

It felt like his whole body was being overwhelmed right now, but at the same time, it felt so good. Lucifer's eyes locked with yours, as you can see that he's trying very hard to just relax, to just surrender and let you have your way so you could penetrate him without much problem..you lifted his thigh and placed it over your shoulder as you aligned your dick with his hole, precum flowing out of both of your cocks. With that - you pushed into his eager hole going around halfway as Lucifer moan loudly,

"Ahh! Ahh- oh- goddamnit! Ahh, what the FUCK?! Your huge!" He groaned and moaned as he squirmed at the sudden feeling of you entering him,

"shhh ..shhh..relax sweetheart..I'm only halfway in." You kissed his cheek which was a drastic change from your previous behavior although it did work in calming him down, this was all Lucifer could hope for...sorta, when he heard you were only halfway in he felt himself feel a tad bit of fear.

Lucifer's eyes widen and his body starts trembling a bit. You can easily tell that the sensation is too intense for him to handle right now. His breathing is shallow and you can see he is a total mess right now. His grip on the sheets are all that seems to be holding him to one place at the moment, "holy fuck I'm gonna die...your gonna kill me.."

"oh don't be so dramatic." You pushed in all the way as a bulge was prominent in his lower stomach from you going balls deep within him, your dick hitting his prostate as his walls clenched around your cock as you let out a quiet groan, you rubbed his hips as you continued. both of you felt so much pleasure it was so so good..

His whole body is trembling as his breath catches. His eyes roll to the back of his head as he moans loudly. His grip on the sheets are now tightening, his teeth are clenched as he tries to remain conscious. He looks at you with shaky eyes, his cheeks flushed and sweaty. A sudden jolt went through his body in that moment. He is just losing it at this point, his mind is blank with no actual thoughts other than this. Every single movement of yours felt like an overwhelming feeling and his body was responding to that. His fingers were digging deep into the sheet while his whole body quivered with pleasure.

You started to thrust in and out of him deeply, hitting his prostate as he moaned relentlessly, "ah! Ah! Ah! Goddamnitttt- fuck! Fuck! Don't- don't stop-" his eyes rolled back, he looked so pretty - tears streaming down his cheeks, his puffy lips pink and his face was red as you wrapped your hand around his throat, pounding into his slutty man cunt, giving him no time to take a breath. He came in which you chuckled, "awe... already? Did my slut already cum?"

He choked out a sob as you continued to hit his prostate repeatedly, your hand only applied more pressure on his pretty throat as he moaned and whimpered, "plea- Ohhhuh!..can't..can..sooo..i can't; I can't ..take it sir.." his speech was slurred as you didnt have any remorse.

"too bad. We just started."

#dom male reader #lucifer morningstar #seme male reader #dom reader #hazbin hotel x reader #smut #lucifer smut

[belokhvostikova]

𝐒𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭, 𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐁𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 | Perhaps the karma gods of the world were just as perverted as Hawkins’ residential Freak, Eddie Munson, himself, as the perfect opportunity to lay his hands on you arose when you go searching for helpless students to tutor.

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | Swearing, brief mentions of religion, naivety, feelings of embarrassment, perversion, and explicit sexual content: fondling, minimal spanking, mentions of virginity, mentions of female masturbation, male masturbation, tiny praise kink, stuffed animal humping, clit rubbing, handjob, oral (both receiving), corruption kink, cum eating and dubcon (just precautionary).

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞 | I tried to be gross! Sorry it took so long. It's quite hard writing about a plotline that doesn't pertain to Eddie being mad at us for taking his picture and putting it in the yearbook (my series, you should read it). I'm trying to get into the groove of writing, so I apologize in advance if this is literal butt cheeks, I tried. Also, you will be getting an unwarranted history lesson.

𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐬, 𝐃𝐨 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭.

“…Man, I told Jeff that my mom would get pissed off if he left his beer cans in the garage, and he was all like, “Nah, dude, I promise I’ll pick ‘em up,” and he didn’t! Of course, he didn’t…”

In retrospect, tuning out the complaints of Gareth Emerson may not have been the smartest moves, as Corroded Coffin had just lost their only space to freely practice. You know, where they wouldn’t get dirty looks and threats of the police for public disturbance. And surely, as lead guitarist and singer of such an aspiring band, Eddie Munson would have been fully engrossed at the sudden mention of the deterrence into their path to wealth, fame, and glory… right? No. Because this is Eddie Munson we’re talking about here. And behind that domineering rockstar facade of leather jackets, clinking chains, gaudy jewelry, and a tight- tight pair of denim pants, yes, behind those pair of pants was a pulsating cock that was desperate to grow twice its softened size just two minutes and twenty-three seconds before he had to face Mrs. Wither’s biology class, all because Eddie Munson saw you.

Why- why on God’s green Earth would he ever choose to listen to the cracking voice of Gareth Emerson, when you were literally standing right across the hall, not even four yards away? The skirt. The fucking teeny tiny, baby pink, short skirt you decided to wear, the one Eddie was sure that if you bent forward even just a little bit, he would be flashed with the sexy crease of your fat ass cheeks meeting your doughy thighs, and he was desperate to be smothered by it. 

“…So yeah, we can’t practice at my house anymore.” Gareth lamented. That’s when he noticed the oh so obvious, blatantly clear, totally discernable trance of his friend, realizing his entire tangent just deliquesced into thin air with no acknowledgement whatsoever. Gareth slammed his locker shut. “You weren’t even listening to me!”

Eddie’s eyes finally shot away at the bleated tone of Gareth’s rightful attitude. “‘Scuse me? I totally was listening.” He hissed back, evidently not amused with the embarrassing fact that he was caught red-handed. 

“No, you weren’t.” Gareth groused, looking back to follow the ghost trail that once was Eddie’s distracted eye line, which is when he landed on you. “You were just checking out that girl.”

“That girl has a name, y’know?” Eddie retorted.

“That girl isn’t going to help us find a place to practice!” Gareth retaliated. “Stop looking for chicks to score, I’m serious.”

“Hey,” Eddie perked, as he stood straight, countering his friend, “y’know, she’s actually really smart and, like, super fucking funny-”

His friend could only incredulously scoff. “Oh, right, because you’ve totally had a conversation with her.”

“I-I’ve… stood next to her a-and have heard her talk to her friends.” Definitely not the riposte Eddie hoped to shoot out. The stuttering sure as hell didn’t help.

“Oh, so you’re a stalker.” Gareth nonchalantly derided, leaving Eddie to deadpan him. “Look, whatever, man, you can perv on girls all you want, but we have bigger issues at hand, dude. Where the hell are we supposed to practice?” Eddie’s chest ended up being victimized by the harsh poke of Gareth’s stern finger. And if he wasn’t so annoyed with his friend, he would have winced, because that actually kinda hurt a little. But just a little. Eddie’s ego wasn’t about to take a hit today. 

He rolled his eyes with a sigh. “Relax, alright? We’ll work our way around it.”

Truthfully, Eddie had no actual plans of working their way around it, in fact, it was quite a large issue he should have prioritized, but that could wait. Should it? No. But it would. Yes. Surely, staring at you was more of a fun game. He’d done that for the past two years he’d known of you, and he never got tired of it, I mean, how could he? One day—he always chalked up—he would get the balls to actually speak to you. You were always so nice, so sweet, skirting around the halls of Hawkins High that Eddie felt were too unworthy for your leisure, smiling and waving at any and everyone. Last Tuesday, the day you met his perverted eyes—oblivious to his hungry stares—and kindly threw him a beguiling smile as if it wasn’t the most dangerous weapon on Earth, was the day Eddie Munson skipped fourth period and jerked his aching cock in the dingy stall of the boys’ bathroom, before speeding home to fold his pillow in half and slide himself into the makeshift pussy just to fuck it with screwed shut eyes to invision the perfect image of you laying on your back with bouncing tits.

But unfortunately, that was just a dream Eddie Munson would have to deduce himself into every night, because the reality of you ever actually speaking to him was tragically low. Mostly because Eddie was scared he’d stutter and fuck up in front of you. It was embarrassingly shameful when it occurred in the comfort of his own bedroom, as he acted out what he would say to you in the mirror. You literally weren’t even there and he still tripped over his words!

But maybe the karma gods were finally aligning with his life, because he watched you happily place a “Need a Tutor?” sign on the bulletin board of the main hall, with little slips of your phone number ready to tear off and grab for anyone needing some “intimate one-on-one session time.” And, my god, was Eddie Munson anguished for that, so when the pink thumbtack stabbed your preciously designed poster into the cluttered corkboard, and you walked away with a innocent smile that was ready to help anyone in need, Eddie could hear an angel receiving its wings in the distance, as a harp played, and a choir harmonized heavenly, because his mind was stirring with the endless possibilities of raunchy and crude wet dreams. And Eddie was finally receiving a chance to dive into some pussy galore. Gross. 

“Oh, yeah, and how exactly do you plan on doing that? My drum kit can’t fit in your trailer, Grant’s grandma nearly had a heart attack the last time we practiced at his place, and Jeff’s mom still thinks it’s the “devil's music,” so what exactly is your plan here, hotshot?” Gareth scoffed.

“My plan?” Eddie chimed with a menacing smirk. “Oh, well I plan on getting tutored by my future wife.” He slyly leered, as he sauntered his away to your advertisement, Gareth following behind feeling beyond the definitions of vexation. 

“You’re actually insane, y’know that?” Gareth exhaled, as he watched Eddie eagerly tear off a slip and examine it with a prodding tongue through his lips. “This says for anyone needing a tutor in history.” Gareth pointed out. 

Eddie shrugged, as your number slipped into the back pocket of his jeans. “So?”

“You’re not even taking history!” Gareth stressed, as the bell rang to commence class. “What are you gonna do when you show up completely clueless?”

“Dude, she’s looking for idiots to tutor,” Eddie patted him on the shoulder, “she’s expecting cluelessness. And I am the perfect guy. Kay?” He triumphantly smiled. “Stop stressing, go to class. And don’t worry, I’ll send you an invitation to our wedding. Thinkin’ of making it BDSM theme.”

Gareth grimaced. 

Eddie Munson may not have caught onto the obvious insult he just hurled to himself, but that didn’t matter. Not when he had a call to make after school.

-

The ticking minutes of the afternoon couldn’t have passed by any slower, as Eddie managed to work up every excuse in the book to get his uncle, Wayne, to leave early for work: grab some lunch at Benny’s before hand, stop for some coffee at the local cafe, show up an hour early to impress the bosses—though, the bosses didn’t pay Wayne enough for him to feel the need to turn up before his scheduled shift—and soon the minutes turned into hours, and the sun would be setting soon. Eddie could feel you slipping through his grasp, as someone who probably actually needed a tutor was bound to call you before he could- or worse, some sick perv with the same bright idea as him would call you. Though Eddie Munson was adamant on the fact that none of the other guys who creeped on you could take care of you like he could.

Sure, the only experience he ever had was when the older bartender with bouncy hair offered to show the lead singer of Corroded Coffin a “special thank you,” which promptly led him to losing his virginity in the loathsome bathroom of the Hideout, which also led to a frantic eighteen-year-old Eddie anxiously running to the local health clinic for STDs testing when it dawned on him that he just had unprotected sex with a stranger during the dangerous minutes of post-nut clarity. But, Eddie Munson was still a hormonal teenager, and once the negative results cleared him from the nerve-wracking chlamydia or gonorrhea scare, he laid back and relished on the memory of having sex and, well, by the sounds of it—if his memory serves him right—she seemed to enjoy it, too. Granted, Eddie never engaged in any more of her efforts to try again because- well, he was left scarred, but all that is beyond the point. The point is Eddie Munson wanted to be the one to love on you, dote on you, make you feel so fucking good that you were programmatically addicted to him- to his cock. 

Oh, fuck, he’s hard already. 

But finally, as the clock struck six o’clock, his uncle waved him goodbye, and Eddie had ran through the numerous piles of clothes in the trailer—ones he promised to fold—and slammed into the wall phone to begin his endeavors. The crumpled slip of your phone number had been retrieved from his back pocket, and he skimmed the digits, letting his fingers dial as he read each number. It was nowhere near remotely possible, but Eddie Munson had even managed to find your phone number to be so sexy. Mm, so even and divisible. God, he was sick. But nonetheless, the phone rang and rang, and he was muttering the “c’mon, pick up, pick up” mantra to lead him one step closer to you. Communicating through a phone would surely ease his worries about potentially screwing up. He just had to take a deep breath and let the conversation flow itself. But, shit, it was ringing for far too long. You were probably already knees deep into some boring textbook with a helpless classmate, or getting flirted by Nathan Cavanugh, who Eddie once saw check you out; or you were probably cuddling up with Bryce Walters, who would always lean against your locker to sweet talk you during school; or, fuck, you could have already been getting handsy with Harrison Moran, who would always come up and hug you after a footba-

“Hello?” Oh, shit.

“Oh- I mean, uh, hi.” This wasn’t going to work. He was already slipping up. Eddie had never internally cringed so hard, his hand pragmatically slapped his forehead in disbelief, but his mouth just kept moving. “It’s, um, me.” Me?! How the fuck would you know who me is?!

“Oh, my god, hi, Eddie!” You perked with giddiness. What the fuck?

He stammered with confusion, “Wait… how’d you know it was me- like, me, Eddie?” 

“Duh, your voice, silly.” You giggled, as Eddie huffed a breathy chuckle, and leaned against the wall with a curling lip. Maybe this could work. 

“Oh, yeah? You recognize my voice, sweetie?” His lit into a teasing, sultry crisp that had you flustered on the other line. 

“Well, yeah. I mean, you’re always making quite the scene during lunch.” You delicately laughed into the receiver. “I guess it just kinda got stuck in my head, like, you know, when you hear a catchy song?”

Eddie sucked in a breath, as his hand played with the hem of his shirt to tease his sensitive naval with soft touches, and you could thoroughly hear the smirk of his grin oozing through his words. “Oh, really?” He teased rhetorically. “Yeah, no, I understand. I can happily say the same for you, sweetheart. Got such a pretty voice.”

“Oh,” you were clearly rattled, as his compliment hit you, “th-thank you, Eddie. You’re so nice.”

“Aw, well, actually, sweetheart, it’s you who’s so nice. Offering others your help with tutoring, just so sweet, aren’t ya, huh? It’s actually why I’m calling.” He smiled. “You wanna… help me out, princess?”

“Yes, I’d love to!” Your bubbly voice made it certain that you were ready to genuinely help him with his studies, and provide him with the needed lessons. It could almost make Eddie feel guilty. Almost. But his dick was thumping with eagerness, and he was containing all restraints to keep from pressing his bulge against the paneling of the wall to your sickly sweet voice, and thrusting his hips. That would be a new low. Even for him. “I’ve been waiting forever for someone to call, Eds, you don’t even understand. I was beginning to think nobody needed a tutor.” 

“Oh, no, sweet girl, I can assure you I desperately need a helping hand.” He sighed, as the rings on his finger began dancing around the protrusion of his pants, applying just a small amount of pressure. “And I’d fucking love yours.” Your innocent mind absolutely swooned at the opportunity to aid his learning, completely unbeknownst to Eddie’s perverted meaning.

“That’s great, I’d love to help you, Eddie.” You gushed, and Eddie’s teeth had to bite down onto his lip to uphold the self-control of being so desperate he was debating dry humping the wall. “Are you able to come over tonight?

“Oh, yeah, baby, I’ll definitely be coming tonight.” As soon as the call would end, Eddie Munson would drop to his knees and repent all the wrongdoings of his life, if it meant this actually working out for him. It’s doesn’t necessarily fall under the codes of Catholicism to exactly pray in front of the random “Bless this house, O Lord we pray, Make it safe by night and day” calendar with the hopes of finally having sex with his high school crush, but Eddie wasn’t exactly the type to carry around his own crucifix for an impromptu prayer, and he was truly just really fucking horny for you. And he was also smart enough to know his luck. If his life taught him anything, you would actually say that plans came up and you would be too busy to tutor him, and just like that, his opportunity would have disintegrated into dust. Now, while the possibility of that occurring was plausible, it genuinely should not have garnered him the idea to suddenly believe in divine interference and pray to a calendar that he’d get laid, but Eddie Munson did it anyway. Because you had him that fucking forlorn.  

“How does seven-thirty sound? You can come over then, does that work for you?” You were already planning the layout for your study session, when all Eddie could think about was caressing your figure.

“Absolutely.” He affirmed with a tight breath when his teeth bloodied his lip.

“Great, I’ll see you then, Eddie- oh, wait, before you go, do you like cookies? I can make us some as a snack.” God, you really were so fucking sweet.

“Shit,” Eddie mumbled under his breath, “cookies? Yeah, I like cookies, sweetheart. Can’t fucking wait to taste them.”

“Okay, good, I’ll gladly make you some!” You cheered with excitement. “I’ll see you soon!”

Attending high school for six years would surely be more than enough time to, I don’t know, memorize at least one thing about the many lessons Eddie had to endure—science, math, hell, even construction—but nothing cemented into his mind more clearly than the address you’d given him- the address he’d fuck you at… hopefully. God, he could already picture it so vividly. Your pink room of frills and silk. The room where you study. Where you sleep. Where you change. Where you lick your fingers and snake your hand under the lace of your panties to rub your pussy to the thought of being fucked- 

Oh, how the hell was he ever going to survive being in your house?

-

Eddie Munson had stared about the likes of your neighborhood for a good five minutes, finding the audacity to suddenly play undercover detective as a means of “scoping out the scene” to ensure the sanctity of his sexual endeavors. Perhaps the karma gods were desperate to get this twenty-year-old man laid—they had to be tired of the countless prayers for pussy that flooded their heavenly inbox—as Mrs. Winthrop, the forty-something-year-old lady of fancy tracksuits and shiny pearls who loved to patrol the regulations of the HOA, was, fortunately, accompanying her newlywed seventy-something-year-old husband at the City Hall’s Annual Fundraiser Banquet. Had she decided to not meddle into the world of small town aristocrats to weasel her way into her elderly husband’s will, she would have surely caught wind of Eddie Munson’s suspicious activity, and had your house flooded with flashing reds and blues as he sat in the backseat of a police car; hands in cuffs and boner in boxers. 

But Mrs. Winthrop hadn’t been home. And Eddie had deliberated the risk of a possible wandering neighbor catching a glimpse of his dubious acts, and taken it, because in doing so, he was met with the glory of an empty driveway to your home. Where a car—like the silver sedan he learned your mother drove to drop you off to school or the black truck he learned your father drove to pick you up from school—was typically parked had been abandoned to an emptiness, leaving the cemented path to your garage exposed. And peering just a little to the left, he would come face-to-face with the familiar fateful sentiment of that of an empty driveway: an empty curb.

Long gone were the risks of parental interference.

Eddie Munson was fucking you tonight. 

Your doorbell had diffused into quietness. Hidden behind the denim pockets of his jacket, his fists balled tightly, as his mind ran through the notions of how he would manifest this to occur. Worst case scenario, you’d reject his advances… possibly realize his agenda… might call him a freak… definitely a perv… probably slap him in the face, he would deserve it… you could tell the whole school… it would surely spread across town… then the torches and pitchforks would come out- yeah, okay, he should really stop overthinking right about now. But then there were the other thoughts. The thoughts- the debauched thoughts that filled his head of just you and your body completely at his mercy. Best case scenario, you’d fall into his arms… he’d shove his hot tongue down your throat- ooh, better yet, his cock… he’d certainly grope the fattiness of your ass… might tug on your nipples with his teeth… spit on your clit… fuck, then undoubtedly plunge his cock into your cunt until it was drowning in his sticky cum. There was only so much space behind the seam of his zipper before his growing dick would burst through.

The ten seconds of impending footsteps held no merit of preparation for Eddie Munson to secure the steady breath of cool, calm, and collected like he wanted to. He was supposed to up his bravado, put on that bad boy demeanor he knew to flaunt while strutting the streets of Hakwins, Indiana to ensure his character was never physically targeted by the clear disdain the town held for him. And it worked. Never once had it failed to be intimidating. In fact, that very intimidation that was going to be his reliable source of timidly scaring you tino pulling up the soft cotton of your top to flash him the bouncing volume of your boobs for him to pervertedly grab. If it had to get that far. 

But that was all too easy. 

And Eddie Munson hadn’t accounted for the fact that his breath would hitch at mere sight of you beaconing him into your humble home with a peachy “Hi, Eddie” and that sinful skirt that seemed to love your body just as much as he did from the way it clung to your dips and curves. 

“H-Hi, sweetness.” His lips hungry rolled against themselves, as his eyes raked your silhouette upon entering the foyer of your house. “I, uh, I didn’t see anyone in the driveway. C-Can I assume we’re, um, alone?” Eddie shyly smiled.

You were there to kindly answer. “Oh, yeah! My parents drove out of town to attend a familiar friend’s wedding.” See, this is where an attempt at a nice conversation could have occurred, had you not daintily secured your hands together behind your back with pristine posture. With your puffed chest, Eddie’s eyes had absentmindedly diverted to the now pebbling outline of your nipples that seemingly hardened from the draft Eddie had brought in. Heaven truly was a place on Earth- or whatever the hell that Belinda chick sang about. “I hope that’s alright.” You giggled.

“Huh…?”

“I mean, I’m definitely nowhere near as good a cook as my mom, but I made those cookies for you as a treat, and I hope you’ll like them.” You bit your lip. “But, um, if you’re still hungry, we can totally order something for dinner.”

Eddie didn’t know what was louder, the beating in his heart or his cock. Either way, it was blatantly obvious the effect you had on him, and his body was desperately lurching for yours. “Oh, yeah, no, uh, no worries. I-I, um- sorry, I’m just a bit… nervous.” He shied away with a teasing grin.

What more could be expected? Out of the kindness of your heart, your face contorted with concern. “Oh, please don’t be nervous!” You held a soft grip to his bicep, pulling him close. Hook. “I know it can be a little scary being tutored, but I promise you’re totally in control here.” And reel. “We’ll go at your pace. I’m here to help you, remember?” You’d be doting on him the whole night. 

If intimidation wasn’t going to get him to see your pussy tonight, maybe the kicked puppy act will.

A sickening smirk consumed his face, and his hand flew over his heart. “Aren’t you just the sweetest? Got the prettiest heart and face in this town, huh?”

Oh, and how that compliment had you flustering in his grace, looking away with a breaking smile of demure. Being tutored may not have been the most conventional way of getting laid, but the favor was working on his side, and Eddie was loving his ingenious idea of stealing your advertising slip. “I- well, um, thank you, Eddie.” You smiled, attempting to meet his eyes again. “You know, you’re really nice, too. I knew I shouldn’t have listened to Donna.”

“Donna?” That crank with a stick up her ass, who seemingly tried to control every little thing you did? That Donna?!

Now, say all you want about the morality of following around someone you love, but don’t misconstrued things here, Eddie Munson was not a stalker. Nope. Nuh-uh. Sure, he liked to linger around you, who wouldn’t? And, while, yes, oftentimes- no, all the times, you didn’t know of his presence, but still, it wasn’t stalking. He was just learning things about you. Yeah, learning things. Learning the make and model of your parents’ vehicles. Learning your class schedule in hopes of catching glimpses of you in the hallways. Learning about your favorite subjects and what you hated. Learning the acts that guys did that made your face scrunch up with disgust. And yes, learning about Donna fucking McIntyre, who did seem to catch on to his stalking presence- no, linger presence (totally not a stalker).

In the many instances Eddie stood close enough to eavesdrop on your conversations, he’d grown quite a distaste for Donna McIntyre. Actually, it’d do no justice to deduce his hatred as “distaste.” Eddie Munson fucking hated Donna McIntyre. Listening to her speak was like shoving a knife through his eardrum. He’d only endure it if it meant hearing your honey voice and learning more about you. This particular disdain for your close friend hadn’t appeared from thin air, no, Eddie Munson had complete reasons to hate the ginger; Donna McIntyre had sensibility. Where your naivety had you blissfully unaware of Eddie’s hungry stare, Donna McIntyre had caught onto every one of his perversions. Call it bias, he didn’t care, he hated her. In hindsight, your two year friendship with her had truly saved you from some compromising situations in which creepy men bestowed themselves upon you. Donna McIntyre was there to save you. Leave no girl behind. And you loved her for it. 

Eddie Munson, on the other hand, despised her for it.

A daily routine had manifested itself between the two rivals. One where Eddie would lovingly stare at your perched breasts spewing from your low-cut top, only to accidentally make eye contact with Donna during his spare seconds of eyeing you, being met with one of the most—rightfully—disgusted stares from her. He was left scoffing every time she grappled onto your elbow and pulled you away wherever you stepped within his vicinity. 

“Yeah.” You sorely pouted. “See, she’s, like, my best friend ever, but she always says the nastiest things about you.”

“Like what?” He questioned with squinted eyes. 

“Well, I don’t want to say the mean names she calls you, but she always mentions how I need to stay away from you; something about you being bad news.” You huffed. “I mean, literally before you came here, I called her all excited that I was finally tutoring someone tonight, because it looks really good on college applications, you know? But when I told her it was you, she completely lost it, saying you were just taking advantage of me.” Fucking divine interference?!

Eddie Munson had to give it to her. She may have been a pain in the ass, but Donna McIntyre was smart.

“Uh, well, y’know, princess, some people are just downright rude.” He dejectedly suspired. “People have been pickin’ on me since I was a child, y’know? Just because I’m different.” Maybe the bruised kid was taking it a little too far, but a special place in hell was already being dedicated to Eddie Munson, with a fiery plaque being engraved with the devil’s sharp talon, so did he care? No. Not when his sob story had you jumping to console him with a sympathizing hug, one where your tits squished against his chest, and he reveled in the feeling of your poking nipples brushing against his body. 

A more than content hum groaned out of Eddie’s mouth, as he wrapped you close, and inhaled a waft of your perfect smell. “I’m so sorry, Eds.” Your heart of gold oozed out with all sadness for him.

“It’s okay, baby-”

“No, it’s not.” You pulled back to pout at him. “People shouldn’t treat you like that. It’s mean. People shouldn’t be mean to you.” Eddie cooed, copying your protruding lips, and sighed happily at your word of action. “You have me as a friend now! And I promise that I’ll never be mean to you. I just want to be nice to you. All the time, be nice to you.”

There’s no way you couldn’t feel his boner pressing into your tummy. “Aw, precious, I’d really like that. You’ll be nice to me? Do anything for me? Make me feel good?”

The quickness to your fervent nod had a sickening grin formulating on Eddie’s expression. “Yes, of course! Always, that’s what friends do.” You smiled. In a flash, you acted on impulse and pressed your lips to his cheek, where your gloss had marked his skin and burned his body. Witnessing you shyly smile at him afterwards had his eyes nearly rolling to the back of his head. “I just wanna help you out.” You whispered.

“You can definitely help me, princess.” He spoke in hushed tones. “Y’know how you can help me?” His face gravitated to yours, target of interest aiming for your lips.

And you looked at him with those innocent, round eyes. “Tutoring you!” You beamed, like you just answered the million dollar question on a game show- well, not Eddie’s preferred game show.

“Oh,” he cleared his throat with a forced laugh to keep you smiling, “yes, of course, sweetheart, tutoring me. That’s the only reason I came here, anyway.” He internally perished. 

You squealed in excitement, jumping from the giddiness of being helpful. “Yay!” You beamed, forcing Eddie to follow suit, his faux enthusiasm compelling him to swallow thickly in order to constrain the blood back to his brain if he was going to sit through a tutoring lesson before seeing your ass in whatever baby pink thong he pictured you wearing. You laced your hand within his—being his only saving grace for enduring schoolwork after hours—and tugged him into the coziness of your living room. “So, are you taking American History or World History?”

“Uh…” Two years ago, Wayne Munson urged his nephew to exercise his newfound 26th Amendment Right to vote at the ripe age of eighteen for the 1984 Presidential Election. Granted, not so much newfound, given that Eddie was still falling off of monkey bars when protests about the monstrosity of what was going on Vietnam managed to lower the voting age; but nonetheless, Eddie had gotten severely tired of being bombarded by Reagan signs that infested every neighborhood street he drove past, enabling him to proudly wear Hawkins’ very own rendition of the ‘I Voted’ sticker. Though, the excitement was short lived, when the Munsons gruffed in disappointment watching Ronald Reagan win his reelection and haunt their lives for another four years to come. Eddie Munson didn’t know what the hell was going on with the world fifty years ago, but the CBS Morning News was raving about the wave of the conservative movement, talks of Gorbachev meeting Reagan was happening, something called the internet was kinda freaking him out, and Eddie Munson voted, so how’s that for American history for you? 

“American- yeah, yeah, American History.” 

“Perfect!” He followed your movements, and joined you on the couch, textbooks and cookies laid out in uniform perfection against the wood of your coffee table. Just for him. “With Mr. Conklin? Or Mendez?”

“Mendez.” At least, he did when he was still a junior and vandalizing the back desk with engravings of immature pornographic sketches. 

“Oh! Donna’s also in that class.” Eye fucking roll. “She told me about that killer quiz you guys had today. Said something about how none of the questions were on the study guide that Mr. Mendez gave to y’all.”

Eddie drawed out an exasperated sigh. “Yeah, yeah.” He lied right through his teeth. “I-It’s why I came to you, sweetheart! I completely flunked that quiz, and- well, then, you- you were just like this angel sent from heaven, offering your help.” He grinned watching you heat up from his heavy stare. “Just meant to be, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess.” Your nerves flustered, as your teeth bit into your lip. “I’m happy to help you, Eds. Anytime you need.” You could feel his breath fanning across your cheeks. “Um, did you, uh, bring your books?” Actually getting a good look at him, Eddie hadn’t brought anything. At all. “Or, um, at least… some notes?”

A whistle of slow realization escaped Eddie’s mouth. “Uh… oh, y’know what happened? See, I was just spiraling from the quiz, a-and then I got so nervous for our tutoring lesson that, y’know, it just completely slipped my mind. I’m sorry, princess.”

“Oh, well, that’s okay.” A sweet reassurance came from your part. “We can just share my book.” You patted the distant space of cushion between you two, one which Eddie gladly took up.

And, my god, was he happy he did, because thighs touching thighs, scents mixing with scents, body pressed against body, and one look down, Eddie was exposed to the glory of low-cut shirts, and your tits presented themselves so beautifully to his eyesight. But a worn textbook weighing the size of a fat dog had slammed into his lap, and suddenly his eyes were tainted by the image of an old, white man who surely didn’t arouse him like the picture of your boobs.

“Great… Thomas Jefferson.” A tight-lipped smile concealed his dismay.

“Uh,” your shy giggle captivated his attention, “no, Eddie, that’s actually James Monroe.”

“Psh.” He puffed his cheeks, nonchalantly waving his hand in the air to brush off his blatant error of mistake. “Right. Totally knew that, sweetheart.”

“It’s okay if you didn’t.” You smiled. “I’m here to help you, remember?” 

“Mhm.” His arm circled around your shoulders, letting your rest back in the comfortable bliss of soft cushions and his presence. He hummed seeing you tuck within yourself, thighs pressing into one another, and he could only imagine what you were trying to relieve. Because Eddie Munson had made you feel things. The sweet tingles you would get when you were alone at night and had all the time to yourself. When you would visualize what it would be like to have a boy like you, enough to want to be your boyfriend, and what you two would get up to. Lacey Fisher, four weeks ago, returned from her weekend birthday trip, and confided in you on how her boyfriend, Henry Aronofsky, took her virginity. She detailed to your curious mind that it had hurt. The initial intrusion, it stung. But then he kept going. And it started to feel good. But what was even better was the closeness. His body on hers. His lips on hers. 

You craved that. And having Eddie’s domineering heat radiate on your skin had your pussy pulsating with a thumping tingle that you didn’t know what to do with. Eddie was cute. Cuter than Nathan Cavanugh, Bryce Walters, or Harrison Moran. Eddie Munson had an edge that made you question why your cotton underwear was becoming uncomfortably wet under his stare. How could Donna McIntyre not like him? He was scarily hot. 

“W-What,” You cleared your throat, “what, um, period are you guys on… in Mr. Mendez’s class?”

Shit. “Uh…”

“It was period four, no?” You opened the textbook on his lap, flipping the silk pages to thumb through the chapters. “Donna had mentioned it, said she wanted me to help her study this weekend.”

Thank god for Donna McIntyre’s big ass mouth. Even if it did shit-talk him. “Yeah, yeah, period four, mhm.”

“Okay, so lucky for you, we will be talking about Thomas Jefferson today.” You chuckled. “Period four spans from 1800 to 1848, which will cover different aspects like the developmental growth of political parties as a result from the expansion of suffrage, and definitive aspects of American culture expounded by the Era of Good Feelings…”

Fuck me.

-

Eddie Munson sat through forty-seven minutes of the Jeffersonian Era, listening of the profoundness of the Revolution of 1800s, and America’s god given right to expansion and the manifest destiny- or whatever bullshit propaganda that damn textbook pounded out to high schoolers just to get to some pussy. But if the United States could gain the delusional superiority complex to conquer and prosper on westward, Eddie Munson could do the same- well, on you. This was just one obstacle. One hurdle. One step closer to obtaining his holy grail of getting his dream girl. Shoving a dozen of the triple chocolate chunk cookies you’d baked him was enough to get him through the painful lecture of the demise of the Federalist Party, though, the events of the Mexican-American War was interesting enough to get him into cheering on Mexican troops over Texan volunteers during the Battle of the Alamo, but enough was enough.

“…With the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo, the U.S was able to gain the southwest territory, which would include New Mexico, Utah, Nevada, and California, but Mr. Mendez likes specifics, so also be sure to remember we gained the majority of Arizona and Colorado, which bled into parts of Kansas, Wyoming, and Oklahoma.” You huffed in one breath. “Oh! And recall the Monroe Doctrine! Given that we had now warned European countries of the potential threats that would happen if they continued to colonize the western hemisphere, the American win over Mexico had further cemented the U.S as growing world power, which gets into the promotion of democracy and isolationism, which we can get into next-”

“Okay, sweetheart, stop right there.” Eddie scrunched his eyes in agony, cutting you off from proffering anymore mush that was stirring in his already confused brain. “Sorry, uh- sorry, but, like, can we take a break?” He sighed.

“Oh.” Embarrassment rushed to your cheeks. “I’m so sorry, sometimes I can get too much into things, we can totally take a break or, um, call it a day if you’d like-”

“No, no, no, no.” He adamantly interjected, closing the textbook with crumpled notes of his compulsory—upon your request—chicken scratch handwriting, brandishing it away next to the crumb-filled platter that once was delicious baked goods. “No, baby, trust me, I don’t want the night to end.” He delicately nudged your chin with his finger, a teasing smile to pair. “I just got a little headache, s’all.”

“Well, are you sure you don’t want to leave to get some rest?” Your brows molded with concern. “We can pick this up tomorrow, or whenever you’re free.”

Eddie Munson played into his bluster of confidence, leaning in close to run a rough-tipped finger down the dough of your thigh, letting your skin wake and react to his heated touch. “What if I wanna rest here with you?” He whispered. “Have you take care of me?”

You gulped. “Um, l-like what?” You nervously giggled. “I can, like, make you soup for-for your headache.” 

“Well, I was thinking more like we can lay down.” He pouted to emphasize his pained facade. “Will you take care of me in bed, baby?”

You licked your lips timidly. “Um, I-I don’t really know if that’s, like, a-appropriate for, um, study sessions. Like, I don’t want you to think I brought you here under the guise of doing… stuff.”

“You can say it, princess.” He smiled. “Say it. You didn’t bring me here to have sex.”

Hearing Eddie’s sultry voice whisper the word had sparked up the special tingles nestled between your thighs, and he could see the sensation consuming your being. “Um, y-yeah. I didn’t bring you here to h-have sex.” Heart racing, you could barely gain the courage to force your eyes upon him. “That’s what, um, Harrison thought when I offered to tutor him.”

“Aw, no, I know, pretty girl.” He cooed, as he firm hand squeezed down on your thigh, pressing the hem of your skirt high. Your sunken teeth had become your only extenuative from letting out a squeal from the jolting sensation. “God, those morons are just dicks. Don’t appreciate how good of a tutor you are. How much of a good girl you are. Right, baby? You’re just such a good girl looking to help, huh?”

You nodded to confirm his sentiment. “Yes, Eddie.”

His hand creeped to separate yours, where they stayed tightly clasped within one another, and he rubbed his fingers against the softness of your warm palm, before confining your hand with his. “Why don’t we go to your room to just relax for a bit, sweetheart? You smell so good, bet your room smells just like you. I love it so much.” 

“Uh…”

“It’ll make me feel so much better, princess.” He cajoled. “C’mon, that’s what friends do, right? You said it yourself, sweetheart.” 

“And then we’ll study again?” You eyed him with a twinkle in your eyes. 

“Man, you really like history, huh?” He teased with a chuckle. 

“Of course!” You happily answered, which had him smiling at your enthused face that glowed giddily. “Why wouldn’t I like something I’m good at?” Spoken with all the confidence. 

Eddie softly laughed in admiration. “You’re so cute.” He gave your thigh another tender squeeze. “Why don’t we do this: you make me feel good, like friends do, and I promise to make you feel extra good?” He stuck out a promising pinky, as he watched you consider his all too innocent proposition. “I’ll make you feel so good, precious.” He whispered. 

“Just relaxing? A small break?”

“Mhm.” He smirked. Fairly ambiguous; not necessarily a lie if not clearly verbalized. But just enough to get you alone in your bedroom. Pinky promised. 

Hands held together, you guided Eddie Munson through the halls of your house to reach your beloved bedroom, where secrecy and intimacy laid between the silks and cottons of your sheets. Each step had Eddie’s dick thumping with excitement, just as anticipated as his heartbeat racing out of his chest. You had never had a boy in your room. In fact, this would have to go untold to the authority of your mother and father, too archaic to understand the innocence of it all. Because that’s all it was. Right? Helping a friend in need to aid him to recovery. Headaches can be killer. Mrs. Weber's fourth period chemistry class often had you succumbed with migraines. Science wasn’t like history. As how Eddie Munson wasn’t like Harrison Moran. He wouldn’t do you as the star quarterback tried with you. Because Eddie Munson was different. Nothing like Donna McIntyre tried to get you to believe. He was different. Right?

“We can just relax here for a bit.” You spoke, as you both entered the confines of your room.

The essence of your own personal girlhood defined the sacred space of your room. Where clean, white walls brightened the mood, personal pictures and feminine posters had livened it up. Sweetness had invaded Eddie’s nose, as he was surely met with the arousing smell of your perfume, predicted to the exact notion. Gold jewelry, the one that complemented your skin beautifully, where dainty necklaces would become suffocated in the valley of your tits, where shiny earrings would decorate your earlobes that Eddie wanted to mouth on, had displayed themselves neatly amongst the products of beauty and self care. Pinks and silks, frills and lace, embodying your sweetness to a T. Effeminate in all aspects of nature.

And Eddie Munson was ready to defile everything. 

Unabashedly, Eddie had breached beyond the realms of a visitor’s right, and taken advantage of the whole ‘make yourself at home’ sentiment that you had actually never spoken; nonetheless, he’d marched his way to your comforting bed occupied by a number of stuffed animals that unfairly got the privilege of seeing you in your most intimate times. 

He splayed himself on the expanse of cushions, a groan leaving his mouth as he relished in the feeling of a bed that wasn’t stabbing of springs, starfishing the expanse that left you giggling on the sideline. “What’re you laughin’ at, you little punk?” He perked. 

“Don’t be mean.” You laughed, watching him grab onto one of the many companions that inhabited your bed. 

“Mm, I think I’m deserving of pokin’ a little fun at someone who owns like fifty stuffed animals.” He smirked, as he beckoned you with a curling finger. 

Given his limbs had almost entirely taken up the breadth of your bed, you were left to sit back on your heels, posture pristine as ever, with your hands neatly kept on the safety of your thighs. Such a sight for sore eyes. Brazen without a care, he hungrily eyed you top to bottom. Bitten lips to round boobs to soft waist to expanding hips. Your revealing skirt inching away and away, giving him a sneak peak to his next meal. 

But while his stares lingered on your body, yours had unintentionally followed suit. Laid flat, the apparent bulge beneath worn denim did not hold merit to the art of concealment, and a quiet gasp left your mouth as you scolded yourself for even peering at your newfound friend like that. “N-Not fifty.” You sternly stated with a smile to get your head straight. “Just four.”

“Still a lot.” He said, investigating the furriness of a chubby bumblebee, one where pink and white instead took over the naturally occurring black and yellow.

“Oh.” His comment had suddenly hit you in a way that made you shame with embarrassment. Unbeknownst to him, of course, he was still finding amusement in the flappy wings of the plushy insect. “Um, d-do you think it’s, like, childish? N-Not mature?” You scratched the back of your neck. Perhaps it was the attachment to the juvenile interest—referred to as by Montgomery Davis, a former love interest that didn’t last too long—that prohibited you from finding an adequate boy to be with.

He had chuckled at the fat stinger. There’s no way that could impale someone. But he had heard the apprehension in your voice, peering up from your stuffed animal to see your more than disappointed face. “Oh, no, baby, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” He quickly forwent Bugsbee the Bee to the side, as a calloused hand landed on your knee for reassurance. Sitting up, Eddie Munson overstepped the boundaries of a tutee to whisper his hot breath against your lips. “I fuckin’ love ‘em. So cute, babe. Just like you.”

“Really?” Your dough eyes scanned his face.

“Would I ever lie to you, sweetheart?” He pinched your cheek. “That’s just not what friends do.” He smiled, as he laid back down. “So, is that what you like to do for fun? Get stuffed animals?”

“Um, not necessarily.” You beamed. “I just like having them around, you know? Keep me company for the things I do like to do.”

“Like what, baby?” He squeezed your knee. “Tell me all that you like doing.”

“Well, let's see, oh, uh, I love journaling. Like, writing my feelings down.” He nodded along, prodding as encouragement for further information. “Uh, typically it started out just in the morning, like, when I wake up, I’d write about what I’d like to accomplish for the day. But then, I kinda realized it’d be nice to vent after a long day, so now, I really just do it whenever.” You shrugged. 

Boys didn’t care about this stuff, but Eddie Munson asked questions. “Yeah?" He grinned. “That sounds nice, baby. Feels like some therapy shit I need.” He chuckled. “Does it make you feel good to write about your feelings?”

“Yeah!” You happily answered. “Um, sometimes it's hard to talk about what I’m feeling to my friends. Like, Donna, for example; she’s got her whole life planned out, she’s so smart. If it’s hard for me to understand what I’m feeling, then I know Donna won’t. I’m scared she’ll judge me.”

“Donna’s a bitch.” He gruffed, with a groan of disdain. 

“No, don’t say that, that’s mean.” You chastised him. “She’s my friend, Eddie.”

“Right, right, sorry, baby.” He quickly made up for it. “It’s just hard to get along with her, s’all. But, uh, this journaling… what kinda feelings do you write about? Like, uh, I don’t know, private ones? You can tell me, honey.”

You nervously laughed, squirming in the seated position of being on your calves. “Y-Yeah, like, uh, well sometimes I worry that I won’t ever get, like, a real boyfriend. Like, a serious relationship. Not like whatever gross hookup the boys at our school want. I don’t want that.”

Eddie caressed the skin of your leg. “Totally, babe. Don’t waste your time with the little boys at our school. You need a real man, huh? Someone who’s gonna take care of their pretty girl.” He smirked, as you nodded in agreement.

Your heart lumped out of your chest, as you followed the languid movements of his large hand encapsulating your bent knee. His touch felt fiery against your skin, creating a series of goosebumps in his guided path, like a mark of territory. Your thighs, once again, clenched at his mercy. Seeing the prominent blue veins reveal themselves from under his alabaster skin had you striked with a familiar heated tingle. The tingles you’d have to satiate alone at night. “You think I can find someone like that?” You softly asked with all vulnerability. 

Eddie snaked his hand upward to gently hold one of yours. “Ugh, absolutely, princess, are you crazy? Sexiest and sweetest thing in the world, remember I told you? I meant it, baby. Sometimes you just gotta look right in front of you.” He smugly smiled. Your mouth went dry, as you attempted to ease your flustered smile. “Just like me, I need a princess to take care of.”

“Mhm, you deserve someone nice, Eddie.” 

“But, uh, I also need someone who’s not gonna judge me.” He perfected a pout that had you sympathizing at his feet. “Y’know, like I said before, some people are just so mean, wouldn’t understand me. Would you judge me, princess?”

“Oh, no! Never, Eddie! Solemnly, I understand the feeling, I’d never do that to you.” You preached with such vehemence, it had Eddie’s blood pooling to the length of his dick with a sickening smile eating his face. 

“So, you wouldn’t judge me if I told you what I like to do for fun, baby?” He played with your fingers, an act of innocence that had your heart soaring. 

“Nuh-uh.” You affirmed with a shake of your head. “You can tell me.” You delicately approached. 

“Well, sweetheart, I really really love touching myself.” He whispered, reveling in the sensation of your hand automatically squeezing his in a tightening hold, eyes rounding in surprise. “I do it all the time, sweetheart.”

“Oh.” Flustered beyond recognition, the single word had become the only thing trusted to speak, as his admission had ignited millions of sparkling tingles, letting a gush of wetness uncomfortably soak your precious underwear. 

He sneered with delight in power. “You’re not judgin’ me, are ya, baby?”

“No, no!” You rushed out. “I, uh- it’s totally n-normal… um, doing that. People- everyone does it.”

“Yeah?” He piqued with interest, watching you unfold into his ingenious trap. “You do it, too, princess?”

Your cheeks were invaded by hot blood, tainting your face with humiliation at the thought of giving up such intimate information. But he was your friend. You didn’t want him to feel judged. And lying was awful. Taught by the man, himself, Honest Abe. Great, and now history was being brought up again! It felt as if the devil had blown his burning breath to flame your face with embarrassment, but the devil was enticing, inching you to the darkside, where you’d be gifted with the persuasion of pure hedonism for the rest of your life. Eddie Munson was the devil. Materialized in the most euphoric way possible. 

You were wriggling, letting spiking friction torment your pussy under his glare. He was waiting. “Um, y-yeah, Eddie. I-I do it. Sometimes.”

An airy groan left his mouth, one he didn’t obscure, simply letting it out for you to witness. “Mm, I knew you would. Pretty girls like you love to touch themselves.” Holding his hand seemed to be the only form of comfort to enduring his gross words. You didn’t want to let go. “Love rubbing your pussy, don’t you baby?”

You didn’t like that word. But words deemed filthy by your definition only seemed to burn you coming from the mouth of Eddie Munson, himself. Harrison Moran once said he’d like to see your pussy. It made you scowl in disgust, and kick him out. But Eddie Munson had you enamored. 

“Yeah.” You whispered bluntly, feeling that his trust could leave you to softly speak with no repercussion. 

“Tell me, sweetheart, with your fingers?” He embraced your hand. “You play with your pussy with your fingers, put ‘em inside to fuck yourself?” Before you could reason, your head had taken the liberty to shake itself for you. No. Eddie’s brow lifted in confusion. Not to define you by the shyness of your nature, but you hadn’t necessarily struck the pervert, himself, as a user of sex toys. Well, at least, he hoped not. Something about introducing you to the world of vibrators and dildos made his cock jump with joy. “You don’t finger yourself? 

“Hands are too small.” You meekly answered, so lightly he could barely hear it.

“What do you do then, baby?”

Perhaps the alchemy of wizardry and spell casting from his beloved hobby of Dungeons and Dragons had magically manifested itself into his current reality—at the very least, it felt as though it had—as Eddie Munson’s words had you reeling in a sudden candid behavior too unfamiliar to your prospective nature. Not to say fibbery came as an innate trait for you, in fact, you honored yourself in the frankness of your words. 

But you had never acted on impulsion. 

And it felt as though Eddie’s provocative language had you destined at his mercy, forcing your body to act with no regards. There was no thinking under his gaze. No hesitation. For the briefest second of quickness, your eyes had landed in the ivory plush of an adorably stuffed bunny sat just three inches away from his shoulder, that had answered his ribald question. 

Your cheeks had ablazened when his quick eye followed your glance that lingered in the air. The corner of his lip had disgustingly peaked into a diabolical smirk, as his perverted mind exploded at the revelation. “Aw, sweetheart.” He groaned, a curious hand reaching out for your bunny.

“No, Eddie!” You tried to jeopardize his movements with urgency. “D-Don’t touch it, it’s not-”

“What is it, sweetheart?” He picked up the bunny, despite your protests. Eddie examined the cute stuffy, his perverted reflection shining back at him through the glassy, round eyes that mimicked your humiliated ones. “Shit, princess, you rub your pretty pussy on your bunny, hm? Does humping your stuffed animal feel better than fucking your fingers inside your cunt?”

“Eddie.” You whined with embarrassment, so shamefaced, dropping your head in your hands to conceal your burning expression. 

“It’s okay, darlin’.” He smiled, loving the twisted feeling of having his dick pulsate at your sheepish state. Eddie pried your hands away, revealing your timid face to him. “Remember, baby, I’m not judgin’ you, I just wanna know. Friends, they tell each other everything and help one another out, you gotta tell me, baby.” With a single hand gripping both your wrists tightly, you refused to look him in the eye, fear consuming you at the thought of Eddie Munson finding you gross for your actions. A wave of tears were threatening your eyes, and you hoped peering at the organized clutter of your nightstand would be enough to withstand the mortifying experience of crying after having him learn what you did. 

“You’re gonna make fun of me.” Your trembling lip managed to mutter out. 

“Aw, no, baby, I would never.” He turned your chin to force you to face him. “Honestly, sweetheart, thinkin’ of you doing that is so sexy.” He groaned with a bite to his lip. “God, picturing you humping your little stuffed animal has me feeling a little hot, see.” His hand deserted your face to rake over his pronouncing bulge, that seemed larger than before. “Mm, got me so worked up, baby. This is all your fault.” He moaned, squeezing his cock with a heavy hand.

Your mouth had opened at the sight of him touching himself over his pants. Those funny tingles had bursted between your thighs, and so insecurely, you questioned him. “Really?”

“Ugh, absolutely, babe.” He returned to your bunny, laying back to play with the small arms of your teddy, as his hand remained stationed on his boner, massaging his erection with breathy grunts leaving his mouth. “You’re so fucking beautiful, princess.” While attempting to ease your emotional nerves, Eddie had taken a good look at your bunny, the evidence of your usage being found in the matted fur surrounding the pink nose of your innocent companion. “Shit, did you fuck yourself this morning, baby?”

“That’s why I didn’t want you to touch it!” You dreaded. “I promise I’ll clean it, give it here-”

A loud gasp left your mouth, as Eddie rejected your request, bringing your stuffed bunny nose to nose, inhaling a waft of the lingering scent of your pussy. His eyes closed in ecstasy, moaning loudly as your raw smell invaded his being, rubbing the tent in his pants harshly for any form of relief. “Fuck, baby, you smell so good. I gotta touch myself.” He flung your precious stuffed animal back, in reach for his belt, cursing under his breath as his abrasive movements momentarily caused the leather to tighten when needing to be off. 

“W-What?” Your brows jumped to crease your forehead. 

“I can’t help it, baby, you’ve got me so fucking hard right now.” Eddie tugged opened his belt, rushing to undo the brass button of his pants. “Fuck, you’re not gonna judge me, right? That’s not what friends do. In fact, friends help each other out. Especially when they’re as sexy as you, baby.”

Swollen to a girth of thickness, Eddie’s cock smacked out with eagerness to fuck, and his precum oozed out, as he watched your face morph into surprise at seeing the first cock in your life. His ringed hand wrapped around himself, cursing under his breath as he felt the jolts of pleasure crash over him. “I touch myself like this, baby, fuck.” He squeezed the head of his cock, smearing his precum down to his base. “Do it so much to you, god, fuck me, princess, I think about you all the time. Can’t stop myself from jerking off at the thought of your pretty, little face.” Eddie whined. 

Your lips stayed stationed agape from the divulgence and sight of what was occurring in front of you. You hadn’t even prospered the fact that your body was reacting more candidly than your mind had anticipated, and Eddie nearly blew his load watching your thighs swish against one another to relieve your arousal. “Y-You think about me?” You delicately spoke. 

“Of course, fuck, fucking look at yourself, mm.” He tightened his grip. “Shit, baby, are you feeling horny, too? Is lookin’ at me making you wanna rub that fucking pussy?”

“U-Um, I-I don’t know.” Nervous eyes attempt to look around for anything that wasn’t Eddie Munson masturbating in your bed. “I-I don’t wanna do anything… anything bad. I don’t wanna get in trouble, Eds.”

“No, no, baby, it’s not bad, it’s good- so fucking good.” He sucked in his breath, as his hand picked up the pace. “Fuck, you’ll feel so good, darlin’- let me make you feel good, princess.” Eddie heaved, inching his large hand up your thigh until his fingers brushed your risened skirt. “Don’t tell anyone, and we won’t get in trouble.”

You watched with heavy pants, as Eddie’s strength managed to dig his fingers into the fat of your inner thigh to part them, and reveal those drenched baby pink panties he so perfectly predicted in the filth hive of his mind. “L-Like this- um, Eddie I’ve never done this with someone else, I-I don’t what to do-”

“Shh, shh.” He demanded, saving your breath from a wrecking tirade of being inexperienced. “Just let me touch you like good friends do.” His fingertips skimmed the puddle in your panties, causing an unwarranted squeal to escape your mouth, as you bucked your hips into his touch. “Oh, my-”

“Mm, Eds, you’re making me feel funny!” You attempted to close your legs, but his hand was quick to lightly slap your thigh in refusal. 

“Don’t fucking close your legs, fuck, just let me touch you.” His grip held you exposed to him, and he was aggressive with the way the pad of thumb smushed against your covered clit, forcing you to ball your sheets into your tightening fists. 

A guttural moan was ripped from you, as his thumb worked intricately to circle your clit, letting your hips ride his fingers. “E-Eddie!”

“That’s right, just hump my fucking hand, baby.” He whined, as he continued to jerk his cock, until his hips were following in sync with yours; his pivoting to thrust into his hand, yours grinding in desperate need for release. “Shit, touch me like I’m touching you- fuck, put your hands on me.”

Eddie’s slick hand grappled onto your wrist, pulling your resisting fist from your balled blanket onto his dick, where he maneuvered your fingers to wrap around his girth and mimic the strokes he once gave himself. A surge of wetness gushed at your given ability to elicit a deep groan from Eddie Munson. Seeing him react to your touch as such spurred a wave of confidence to continue your ministration, tightening your grip around his dick and providing him the languid movements that had his heavy sack pulsating with a need to cum. 

But Eddie Munson’s ego was growing expeditiously. 

And he wasn’t about to be putty in your hands- your oh so tiny, soft hands that gripped him like a vice and made him to want to fuck it for an eternity. No. Not when his hand was cupping your hot pussy, fingers becoming moist through your wet underwear, as they dug between your lips to rub that sensitive little clit and had you whimpering at his command. 

“Fuck, stand up, princess.” He shoved your hand off his cock, simultaneously choosing to regrettably tear his away from the warmth of your cunt.

Whining in despair, you stuttered. “W-What? Why?”

“Because,” Eddie positioned himself to the edge of bed, grabbing your hand to guide onto wobbly feets, pins and needles pricking your legs as they woken from their previous position, “I’m gonna put my cock between your pretty, little lips.” 

Manspreading, his thighs parted for your residence, Eddie’s penis burning red with desire, as it hung heavy against his abdomen, each protruding vein slimed with a coat of his precum. His hands rested on your hips, and he smirked as he took in the sight of your body, one he desired so much to just touch and violate for his pleasure. The blatantly obvious was shown in your face; your undivided attention had primarily focused on his dick, and he couldn’t help the chuckle of egotism that erupted from his chest, as he smoothed down the bumps and curves of your body. 

“Aw, you like looking at my cock, princess?” He sneered with a drenching voice of condescendment that had your head snapping with embarrassment.

“I-I’m sorry-”

“No, no, baby, don’t be.” Eddie’s focus began shifting to the hem of your shirt, teasing it up to reveal the soft navel of your belly.  “It’s all yours to look at. Just like your pussy is all mine.” He bit his lip. “Especially when I fuck my cock inside of you, hm, you gonna let me, baby?”

That had your chest heaving with bursts of nerves, both good and bad. To know Eddie wanted that closeness with you was profoundly what had your heart fluttering with the idea of him loving you to a committed relationship. One where he was a boy calling you his girlfriend, and you were a girl calling him your boyfriend. But Lacey Fisher’s words had suddenly begun playing in your head like a record on loop. “It hurt.”

And Eddie Munson’s cock was pulsating at a length in which both of your hands had to wrap around his girth just to mount it. 

“Um, I-I don’t, uh- Eddie I’ve never done that b-before… I want you, like, to be my boyfriend, right? Like, this is what boyfriend-girlfriends do? B-But maybe I should wait- or we should… as boyfriend and girlfriend.”

There was a little hint in your voice. The way you suggested your ending in a lighter octave, fear that Eddie didn’t want to be your boyfriend, that he’d be just like Harrison Moran. But Eddie Munson wasn’t Harrison Moran, and his smile lit up at the timidness of your stature.

His dream girl. 

“I get to be your boyfriend, baby?” He leaned in to press a tender kiss upon your thigh. 

A shy smile corrupted your face, as you nodded to his question. “Mhm! Is it okay if we kiss like boyfriend and girlfriend?”

He chuckled at your cuteness, squeezing the meat of your legs in frustration at the overload he was feeling for you. “Of course, princess, c’mere.” Bending slightly at the waist, Eddie took the liberty of enduring most of the labor of stretching as far as he could until his lips crashed upon yours. Your mouth just as sweet as your being, Eddie moaned at the moisturizing sensation of the vanilla strawberry lip gloss that conjoined you together. His hands were aggressive to suddenly keep your cheeks in place, forbidding you to leave his mouth until he was ready to let go. It’s why you squealed when learning Eddie had no shame being the messy kisser he was; pushing his tongue between your lips, clashing teeth with teeth, consuming your mouth, and plunging an obscene amount of spit to your tongue, as his ravished in exploration. “Mm, fuck, love kissing you.” His delirious voice murmured against your lips. “Remember, honey,” he finished you off with one more peck, “you can’t tell Donna and friends about this. Not about how we got together, okay?” Eddie stroked your face. “They wouldn’t understand, only say mean things about you and me.”

“Okay.” You quietly agreed, wanting to protect your boyfriend from the harsh words Donna would possibly say. How could she pull you away under the guise of protection, when Eddie Munson’s been nothing but sweet to you? What was she seeing that you weren’t? Surely, you always kept your mouth closed, deciding against your sour opinion of Tucker Walsh, who Donna had on-and-off dated for months. 

“Yeah, you’ll be a good girl and won’t tell anyone?” He cooed, stroking your face. 

“Uh-huh.” You gently beamed, seeing his eyes scan your face with proudness. 

“Perfect.” Eddie pecked your nose. “Now, c’mon, sweetie, don’t you wanna show your boyfriend your tits? Always dreamed of seeing ‘em.” Untrustworthy of your awkward movements, you had let Eddie take the reins, simply standing straight to have him, once again, persist the labor of handling you to undress in front of him. His fingers tickled your sides, as they grappled with your shirt to pull it over your head, and spring your tits from the confinements of the tight material. Eddie dramatically sucked in his breath upon sight, mumbling swears because your nipples had hardened from the chill air. “So fucking pretty- fucking beautiful, sweet girl.” He groaned, taking advantage of your topless self, and having a squeeze at your boobs.

“Y-You think I’m beautiful?” You whimpered, loving the beguiling feeling of his callouses scraping your tits, only to pull and pinch at your sensitive nipples. 

“So fucking beautiful.” Eddie was quick to answer, placing a kiss to your belly button, which had butterflies fluttering in your stomach, making you swoon over your kind boyfriend. Boyfriend. “Most gorgeous fucking girl I’ve ever seen. Just wanna be with you so bad- always wanted to be with you, sweetheart.”

“You are with me… now.” You giggled, which had him grinning salaciously. 

“Yeah, I am, huh?” He hand traveled down to your skirt, playing with the soft fabric. “Got the prettiest girl in school at my hands, I’m so fucking lucky.” He teased his way to the hem of your underwear, teetering between gently pulling them down, only to secure them back in place just to have your squirming with want. “I want you to do somethin’ for me, baby, okay? Just wanna see you out of these cute, little panties, but, honey, turn around and do it.”

Ready to please him, you obliged, turning your backside to him, leaving you to look back and watch him sit back to enjoy the incoming show, as his hand wrapped around his cock and, once again, began his slow strokes. “Like this?”

“Mhm.” He breathily sighed. “Just bend over real deep, princess, so I can see up your skirt, and I wanna- fuck, I wanna see you take off your panties just like that, shit.” 

Eddie Munson was a little weird. 

But maybe that’s what makes your boyfriend so interesting. Getting to know him will be fun. But for right now, you’d do as he says. The idea of making him happy made your heart flutter with joy, as a little voice in your head spoke to you that Eddie Munson was there to make you happy, as well. Bending forward, your skirt had completely risen, exposing your ass to him and that darkened spot in your panties waving at him as a tempting testament to how horny he was making you feel. 

“God, what a fucking ass.” Eddie grunted, spurring his hips to fuck up into his hand. “Go ahead and take those panties off, baby, show me what’s waiting for me.”

Grabbing the lace of your underwear, you tugged down the cotton, fighting the bit of resistance from when Eddie’s fingers buried your panties between the lips of your pussy. But they peeled off, showing him strings of sticky wetness that clung to the gusset and glistened your cunt. Eddie had to immediately stop touching himself, almost shooting his cum out from the sight of your puffed pussy lips squished between your thighs. As your panties teased down your legs, pooling at your ankles, you were startled from the abrupt groping from your boyfriend, feeling him grab handfuls of your cheeks that kept you spread wide, as you stood straight. 

“Eddie!” You shrieked into small laughter.

“Oh, my god, you’re gonna fucking kill, baby, fuck, look at you- this ass, look at this fucking wet pussy.” He kneaded the dough of your butt, before placing a stinging spank to watch the fat jiggle from his heavy hand. 

“Ow, Eddie!” 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.” He was quick to land delicate kisses to the burning area, as the incriminating hand ran over your skin to soothe you. “Just can’t fucking help it.” Securing your hips, Eddie turned you around until your pretty face was smiling down at him, letting his cock twitch with all love and adoration for you. 

“What now?” He loved your curiosity. Getting to corrupt your innocent mind into wanting more, until you were his eager slut, begging to shove his cock into all your holes until you were leaking his cum. 

“Now,” he smiled, reaching behind him to bring forth your plushie bunny, one tainted with your cum and it had his dick jumping for joy, “you’re gonna show me how you fuck your little bunny, baby.” You swallowed thickly at his request, a twinge of embarrassment coursing through you at the request of showing Eddie something so carnal. But he was your boyfriend. And you could find trust in your boyfriend to make you feel good. “But I also need you to work that little mouth around my cock, honey. Can you do that? Suck it for me?”

You feared disappointing him. “I-I don’t know how. I’m sorry.”

“No, no, it’s okay, I’ll teach you, baby. Just get on your knees for me, yeah?” Last month, Eddie nearly combusted into the crotch area of his jeans watching you suck on a red lollipop during the chaotic minutes of lunch. Safe to say, an entire monologue teasing the meaning behind the potential return of hooded cultists had been ruined in the midst of advertising his upcoming campaign to his eager friends, who embarrassingly had to watch their Dungeon Master choke on his spit, when Eddie found your tongue twirling around the cherry ball of candy, only to suck up the syrupy saliva into you mouth. The head of his cock was no different than that lollipop. You’d do just fine. 

Letting your knees rub against your carpeted floor, your hands find perch onto his denim thighs, and you outlined the length of his cock with eyes, wondering how something of that thickness could fit into your mouth. Eddie parted ways with his pants, shuffling out of the rough material, with a metal chain and leather belt clanking along the way, to ensure enough room to have you get off on your stuffed animal.

“Go ahead, baby, start humping your little stuffie for me.” Eddie had meticulously placed your bunny between your legs, watching you for the moment your pussy came in contact with the nub of its nose. 

Eddie hissed at the affliction of pain from your nails digging into his hairy thighs, as you became too enlivened by the friction of your clit grinding against your little bunny to account for the provocation you were besetting against him. But Eddie Munson loved it. His immoral mind found arousal in watching you abuse his skin from pleasure, compelling his cock to jerk with profound need. 

“Yeah, feel good, princess? Rubbin’ that fucking pussy?” You pathetically nodded, gentle whispers of whimpers leaving your mouth, as you humped your teddy with all conviction. “God, just love usin’ that little bunny as a fuck toy, huh?” He pinched your chin to force your glossy gaze upon him. “Just like I’m gonna use you, right, honey?”

“Mhm, oh my- mm, fuck!” Your tummy clenched, as your hips picked up the momentum to circle the stuffed animal's face, and defile its fur with your wetness.

“Yeah, you’re gonna be my sweet, little bunny?” Eddie’s thumb began pulling at your bottom lip, leaving him cursing as it bounced back to its plumpness. “My sweet, little bunny who’s gonna be my little fuck toy to use whenever?”

“Y-Yes, Eddie… whenever.”

“Fuck, open that pretty fucking mouth for me, and stick out that tongue, baby.” Holding his cock up, Eddie smiled as you obliged so kindly, letting him smack the angry tip of his dick against your tongue, as you finally got a taste of him. 

“This w-will make you feel good, mm?” You pondered through mumbles, as you lost yourself in the sensation of pussy buzzing from the burning friction against your clit. 

“Yes, baby, fuck, just keep your mouth open.” Eddie’s hand fell heavy upon the top of your head, as he beckoned you to take him deeper, letting his cock to become enveloped in the soft warmth of your mouth. It became no question of whether this would feel good for him, the guttural moan that left his mouth upon intrusion had your hips bucking with fervency. 

The viscid coating of his cock with pungent precum made you hum, igniting a series of grunts from your boyfriend, as hissing vibrations exploded in his body. Eddie guided your hands to the base of his cock, encouraging you to massage the leftover that wasn’t occupied by your mouth. “Fuck, yes! Make it messy, baby, just spit all over it!” 

Eddie Munson sat back in rhapsody, losing himself in the delirium of having you choke on his cock, as your spit puddled his length, escaping your lips as you suckled on the frenulum of his head. His hair cascaded down, letting his body become too heavy to support as your mouth was bringing him a gratifying high that he never wanted to come down from. Your humps grappled against thumping his thumping veins, enclosing him into a vice grip that had him moaning at your mercy.

“Mm, sh-shit, princess, your—ugh, aaahh—mouth!” He huffed against his restricting lungs. Eddie’s hips began to mimic your bucking, as you moaned at the fizzing rub of your bunny scratching that greedy itch on your clit, allowing him to shove his cock to the gummy constriction of your throat, forcing you to gag on his invasive cock. Sweet spit raining down to his heavy balls, letting his pelvis of bushy pubes become soak with your secretion. 

You pulled off with a sore throat, thick strings of spit sticking from his cock to your lips, as your watering eyes scarily gleamed up at him. “Ugh! Y-Your too big- I can’t-”

“Yes, you can, fuck, it’s feels so fucking nice when you choke!” He urged your head back down, now blubbering with a need to finish on your tongue. “J-Just keep fucking yourself, shit! Don’t stop until I tell you.”

Your tongue reached to tickle the underside of his dick, memorizing his stern rigids that had your jaw hurting from breaking open. Eddie sat up to spy down your backside, where he virtually lost it at the sight of your ass cheeks recoiling from the lively movements of your hips humping your stuffy. “Ugh, you gonna cum, sweetheart?” He cupped your face, guiding your languid movements up and down his cock, as you went through the endeavor of nodding to his question. “Fucking cum, baby, cum all over your little bunny!” He demanded. 

His heavy hand landed on the back of your head, shoving your face to become suffocated in the unruliness of his pubic hair. Nose inhaling his musk, you sputtered on his cock, gagging at his length prodding at the back of your throat, all to bring Eddie’s long arm down to reach for your ass. A burning sting from a substantial slap had you wailing on his fat cock, “Fucking faster.” He dictated your movements, spurring your hips to drive into the plushy with spanks to your tormented ass. “Cum with me, fuck! M’gonna cum! Cum, baby, cum!”

The bundle of nerves in your pussy began detaching from one another, like a rope inching to snap. Rutting into your stuffed animal, your muffled moans were buzzing his cock, bringing you to the brink of a gushing explosion. Your thrusting became uncoordinated, as your tummy bursted with euphoria, and your release adulterated your white bunny. 

Sobbing on his cock, his stomach muscles tightened into an agonizing cramp, as his balls clenched to pump out his seed, flooding your throat with his hot cum. “Ah! Shit, shit, shit—ugh! Fuck me!” Gagging, your hands repeatedly swatted his thick thighs—decorated with the crescents and blistering scratches of your nails—to release you from potentially vomiting on his dick. 

His hand relinquished his hold, allowing you to come up for air. Gasping, struggling to find a breath of fresh air, as a concocted mixture of spit and cum dribbled out from your mouth, but you had no hesitation licking your lips to consume the strange taste of his release.

“Holy shit, that was incredible!” Eddie dropped back onto your bed, hands gripping his sweaty curls, as he urged his mind to collect the events that just transpired before him. Chest heaving, teeth gritted, skin moist, this- this is what that Belinda chick was singing about! It wasn’t until a warm head landed on his thighs, that his thoughts jumped to prioritize your wellbeing. In retrospect, the notion of his sticky balls pressing into your temple with his flaccid cock resting upon your forehead shouldn’t have been so idyllic to Eddie Munson, but my god, was his heart constricting at your exhausted state—half-lidded eyes begging for rest, plump lips parted for airy breaths, and your manicured fingers delicately tracing against the hairs of his thigh to soothe the injuries you were beginning to feel remorseful for inflicting. 

His hand gently stroking your cheek, garnering your attention, letting you tiredly peer up at his rosy state of pink cheeks and glistening skin. “You okay, princess? Too much? I shouldn’t have gone so rough, I’m sorry, baby. Fuck, just lost myself, you felt so good.” 

“It’s okay.” Your saccharine voice assured him. “You’re my boyfriend, you can do anything to me.”

Eddie Munson lovingly smiled at you, as he caressed your hot face. “As long as you want it. Only. Okay?” You nodded with confirmation, and you gazed up at your boyfriend with endearing eyes that had him bubbling with devotion to you. “Such a good girl, did you cum?”

“Uh-huh.”

“I promised to make you feel extra good, didn’t I, baby?” He smirked. “C’mere.” His strength guided you onto your bed, laying you against your cloud-like pillows, before reaching down to grab a hold of your bunny. Soiled with your cum, Eddie’s menacing grin cracked through his face, as he lightly pressed a finger into the wet fur. Your tummy stirred watching his tongue delve into the drenchness, and humming with delight. “Fuck, your pussy taste so good.” He groaned, discarding your stuffy to climb between your thighs.

Steady on his knees over you, he peeled off his ragged shirt, exposing his ivory skin of sharp bumps and squishy softness, ornamented with scary images of permanent ink your parents would surely scowl at if they ever saw. You beamed at him. “You’re so pretty, Eddie.”

His teeth stabbed into his lips, as he teasingly smiled with giddiness. “Thank you, darling. Never as pretty as you, though.”

While wanting the intimacy, you couldn’t help the surge of anxious nerves that brought an onslaught against you, as Eddie began trying to liven his cock with small strokes while eyeing your glistening pussy. “W-Wait, um…” His brows jumped into his bangs, as he awaited your concerns. “No.” You swallowed thickly. “Eddie, I’m not ready for… that.”

He could be Harrison Moran. He could break up with you. He could scoff at your prudeness. But Eddie Munson was simply a perverted man who devoted his longing into the beautiful girl that graced the halls of Hawkins High. He wasn’t Harrison Moran. And you learned that as Eddie stayed silent, merely leaning down to place an electrifying kiss to your lips, pouring out all his adoration for the girl that captivated his dreams every night for the past two years. 

“I still wanna keep my word, sweetheart.” He murmured into your kiss. “Can I do something else?”

You meekly looked into his darkwood eyes. “Will it hurt?”

“Not at all, princess.” He eased the scrunch of your worriment brows with a peck to your forehead. “I’d never hurt you.” 

With the nod of your head and the words of your mouth, Eddie had your corroboration to do as he please, and his mouth had traveled down the junction of your neck, sucking small love bruises to the column length; to the valley of your breasts, where his lips unclosed your hardened nipples with gentle suckles; and the softness of your bell, decorating your stomach with appreciative kisses that made you feel beautiful to the touch; before his breath became hot over your needy cunt. Sugary kisses of mawkish desire met the plushness of your inner thighs, inching to your swollen pussy lips, irritated and slick from the rawness of rubbing against your bunny. 

His long tongue dragged its way to part your cunt, leaving your breath to hitch at the newfound contact of his wet muscle ravishing you. If this is anything close to what he felt when your mouth was on him, surely you could forgive him for the bruised throat you’d have to aid in the following morning. Eddie became brutally gluttonous at the tangy arousal he slurped from your pulsating hole. So small and unused, he’d have a fucking field day when the moment would come he could drill his cock into you virgin pussy.  

The tip of tongue burned against your abused clit, agonizingly teasing swirls around the nub just to flick it with fervency, and have you crawling away from the unbearable overstimulation. “E-Eddie!” You stumbled for air. Your foot had planted itself against his hot forehead at an brutish attempt to push his determined mouth away, but Eddie Munson triumphed you in the realms of physical strength, and his arm had pried you open, before securing themselves to ground your squirming thighs. 

Latched like a leech, Eddie was becoming feverish from the deliriums of being pussy drunk. Sucking onto your clit, his head shook to abuse you, forcing the muscles in your legs to tighten with trembles. Your scent had engulfed him, as his nose smushed against your clit to snake his tongue into the clenching walls of your velvet pussy. Incoherent words were tumbling into your pussy, entirely unheard from your wrenching moans. 

“So fucking good.” He gargled into your cunt, groaning into your pussy, and making out with your entrance. Heaven was a place on Earth, and it was you. 

“I-I can’t, Eddie! Too much!” Though, your actions had conflicted with your words, hands buried into his hair, shoving his face to be submerged between your thighs, as your hips gyrated against the dimensions of his pretty face. On the precipice of letting go, your back flew off the surface of your bed, shaky legs lovingly crushing his head, with a moan beyond hotter than the numerous porno films of corny lines and exaggerated screams Eddie consumed just to perfect his skills. “I’m c-cumming- aahh!”

Eddie slurped your remaining juices, tonguing your pussy in search for anymore of your delicious cum that he would relish in. Patting your throbbing clit with a cherishing kiss goodbye, Eddie climbed your limp body, with a mouth and chin laminated with your wetness. One he smashed into your mouth with a smearing kiss against your lips, giving you a taste of the tarte sweetness of your pussy. 

“You’re such a good boyfriend.” You breathily giggled against his mouth, leaving him chuckling at your inebriated-like state. “Best one I’ve had.”

“I’m the only one you’ve ever had.” He laughed, as he guided you to rest on the thumping beat of his full heart. 

“So?” You smiled. “Donna’s always complaining about Tucker, and you’re nothing like him. I could never complain about you.” You were making him melt into a puddle of mush, as your words erupted in his tummy. He smiled down, kissing your hairline, before nudging you to grab a hold of your lips to his. “Mm, you smell good.” You hummed with delight.

Eddie guffawed. “Princess, that’s your pussy on my face.” He bumped your scrunching nose with a tender finger. “I probably smell like sex, sweat, and cigarettes, sweetheart.”

“But it’s you. I like you, Eddie.” Your round eyes peered up at him, and he held your contact.

“Yeah?” He whispered. Insecurity was swirling within him. Surely you were just babbling from the orgasm gifted upon you from him. Eddie Munson was Eddie Munson. You were fucking you. His vulgar behavior and profligate mind was undeserving of a girlfriend like-

“I’ve liked you for a while.” You smiled with closed eyes. Relishing. The bombshell of the revelation had his bursting with cinching brows of astonishment. “Remember, two years ago, we had art class together?” Remember? It was the day Eddie Munson first laid his eyes on you, of course, he remembers! Don’t say it, don’t say it, don’t s- “I saw you, and you were just so cute doodling in your sketchbook. These scary monsters, and stuff. But they were good. I always wanted to compliment you on it, but I never got the courage. Just stuck to having a crush on you.” You delicately giggled. 

Eddie Munson could have been fucking you for the past two years?!

You were quick to hum into a light slumber. Eddie was stupefied at the actual idiocy he was currently metaphorically forehead-slapping himself for. That was until your sudden jolt had him jumping with concern.

“Oh, my god! Eddie, we completely forgot to go over the promotion of democracy and isolationism coming into the late 1800s!” You heaved.

He cooed. “Oh, sweetheart…”

𝐓𝐚𝐠 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭 | @sierrahhh

#stranger things #stranger things fic #stranger things fanfic #eddie munson #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #perv!eddie #perv!eddie munson

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for beating the shit out of my sister?

I( afab 16) live with my parents, and sister and her fiance. My sister I will call Lana, is 23 and has a lot of issues with my parents.

My mom is disabled and can't bend at all, so I pick up a lot of housework for her, but my sister is resentful. She is very disrespectful and I always stand up for my mom, as she feels guilty about her disability, but I blame my sister.

Usually Lana screams at mom and calls her names, even get the cops called a few times until she goes to her room and screams in there, but about 2 weeks ago she got a peak and shoved my mom, who fell and threw out her back, hearing her fall and the argument, I called my dad who lives about 10 minutes away and helped my mom up, and put her in her chair, and when my sister called me a stupid momma's boy who hates her I kind of snapped, my dad was on the way but I tackled her and started punching

I am a big dude, even if I was born female. I am about 6'2" and 269 lbs, and I workout a lot. My sister is 5'7" and maybe 150 lbs.

My dad got home maybe 2 minutes later but the damage was done, I had a large scratch on my arm and bruise on my face, and my sister had a bloody nose, numerous bruise on her body and face, a fat lip and a black eye.

My dad pulled me off her and she cried saying I attacked her for no reason but my dad new she hurt my mom so he knew she was bull ahotting, he grounded me for a week and helped her clean her lip and nose, and I made sure my mom was okay

My dad understands what I did, but my mom's said she was disappointed as she never raised me to resort to violence.

I feel awful, but I won't apologize to my sister which my dad respects, my mom told me that I should so I have been feeling mixed

Am I the asshole? I didn't want to hurt her, but I just couldn't stand there and let her hurt my mom. But she is my sister and I'm almost twice her size.

My parents say I should say sorry as outr relationship is important and I agree but I'm just not ready, I get so mad when I see her.

Was I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #violence cw

[eyenniie]

౨ৎ ; Cheerleader ♡

Pairings : Tartaglia/Childe/Ajax x fem!reader

Warnings: nfsw, spicy but will possibly be in two parts (sorry bunnies), bimbo!reader, footballplayer!Ajax, cursing, modern!au

a/n ; n js so yuu kno bunnies, this is my first time writing anything spicy so sorry if it's cheesy ml..♡

It was a typical school day, well after school day.

Nothing out of the ordinary of course.

Ajax was sitting down around his many football friend, half lidded eyes seemingly staring at a particular girl dressed in a skimpy and revealing cheer uniform among her many friends, innocently enjoying being surronded by her cheer buddies.

(Y/N)'s friendgroup was the loudest among many of her other classmates in the classroom, without them the class would ve filled with a awkward quietude as they were possibly the only source of sound in that room.

Usually, they only ever discussed about cheer, whether it be practice or gossip about another one of the cheerleaders on the opposing team.

But on this very day, the girl's were discussing about a very different topic: If (Y/N) had gotten her first kiss, and most importantly, if she lost her virginity to anyone on the premisis.

The conversation had started off small and innocent, but turned into a big Q/A for poor (Y/N), she could only sit there and endure being asked questions on whether or not she had slept with anyone yet.

This had piqued the attention of a certain ginger haired classmate of hers, who may or may not have a big fat crush on her, and possibly a raging boner at the thought of her being fucked brain-dead by he himself—

"You'kay man? You look red— like, Diluc's hair red.." One of Ajax's friends said, Itto, who was sipping on some water before Diluc had slapped the back of his neck, causing the dude to start choking.

Diluc wore a scowl on his face, similiar to one of the more shorter players, who was also Aiax's bestfriend, Scaramouche.

Ajax could only give a forced, wry smile whilst crossing his legs to try and hide the tent building up in his basketball shorts.

"Nah, i'm fine, y'know.. Just really excited for this season's playoff's.." He could clearly feel the thick atmosphere inside the classroom, knowing his teammates do not believe his empty words that uttered his lips.

Kaeya knew about the ginger's crush on one of the cheerleaders, hell, everyone in his friendgroup knew about it. Considering it was quite obvious, Ajax would always get distracted by the sway of her hips during their practices— And to top it all off, that cheerleading uniform that the school provided, everytime he would get a good glimpse of her in that short miniskirt..

He couldn't take it, all Ajax wanted to do was fuck her behind the bleachers, rough and hard..

"We could all see the pathetic stares you give her Childe, man up and ask her out, you pussy.." A hoarse, rough voice spoke, his purple haired bestfriend had an shit eating grin plastered on his face.

Oh how Ajax wanted to bitch slap that look right off that cheeky little bastard's face, but he knew he'd only make things much worse.

Playing dumb was the only thing thht he could do in this moment, trying to save himself from looking like a lovesick puppy. "I don't know what you mean, ask who out?" Of course, no one believed him, it was quite obvious that his eyes were set on someone.

"Dude, even Itto knows you like (Y/N), and his IQ is lower than a donkey's.." One of his friends joked.

Itto, who was picking his nose a few seconds ago, slapped the guy's head in response to the small comment.

It was pointless for Ajax to fight back, of course, they were right after all, he did have a crush (and a raging boner lol) because of (Y/N), who also, had a huge crush on him.

Before Ajax could give his friend's another glare, a small object from (Y/N)'s desk hit the hard wooden floor with a small 'clink', wondering if he should get up and get it for her, Ajax wanted to see how thing's would play out.

"Oopsies!— Hold on I dropped something, ehe~!"

A certain high pitched voice rung out, It was (Y/N).. Who was know currently bending over to get the item she dropped, that same mini skirt barely covering her panties that were on full display for poor Childe..

"Oh my fucking god.." Childe muttered with widened eyes, thing's had gotten even worse for the poor ginger haired male..

౨ৎ ; Pt.2 coming out soon luvs<3

#౨ৎ;Spicystories👙 #genshin impact #genshin x reader #tartaglia #tartaglia x reader #childe x reader #childe #ajax x reader #childe tartaglia ajax #ajax #genshin smut #genshin #tartaglia smut #tartaglia x reader smut #tartaglia x fem!reader #childe x fem!reader #ajax x fem!reader #genshin ajax #childe x reader smut #ajax x reader smut #fatui harbingers

[weebsinstash]

OHOHOHO, I absolutely LOVE the idea of an unhinged, yandere omega. Who would ever suspect the 'soft little omega' as an actual danger? What can they do, cmon, you should be flattered~

Or even if it's someone like Miguel as an omega, despite him being Absolutely Huge and totally able to crush you like an empty soda can there's this... lingering /urge/ to protect and serve him that he takes full and absolute advantage of.

Like, say he decides he needs an assistant to help him keep track of his busy schedule and any objections you come up with straight up don't matter because He's An Omega and you Have To Help Him. Or just kind of plucks you up one day and informs you you are now on call for his upcoming heats- what're you gonna do, tell this 'clearly vulnerable and fragile' Omega you aren't interested?

You can be chatting to someone and have him come up and literally drag you off and EVERYONE dismisses it or blames you for setting off his fucking 'nesting' instincts like he's not a grown ass man capable of making his own damn decisions.

Or even him pheromone bombing you to make you all pliable and agreeable when he needs it. His Alpha is getting fussy? He just forces your face into his neck until you go all soft and dazed and fuzzy, letting him do whatever he wants because you're just absolutely punch-drunk.

Anon you are opening my mind's third eye right now, there's a post I think about from time to time and it was kinda about gender roles and like certain things being subjective and it was someone going "am I still butch if I have plushies all over my bed" and someone replied something like "dude that's butch as hell, you have all these cute tiny creatures you're being a guardian of and feel protective of"

You're just a female Alpha trying to mind your own business and one day you get a good WHIFF of those Certified Omega Miguel Pheromones and suddenly your stupid ass Hormone Brain is going "hey, hey, you know what would be very Alpha of you. If you took care of that Omega by getting pregnant and giving him a baby. Don't you want to give the Omega a cute little baby or two to take care of and give kisses to and buy little baby clothes for? Don't you want to see his big strong arms holding a lil teeny baby? He'd be SO HAPPY if you gave him a lil baby. Just one. Or a few. Provide for your Omega by taking a fat cream pie from that man. Dont you want the Omega to be happy" and from then on your coochie/instincts are like screaming out half the time you're around him

I guess it can kind of vary depending on how "all consuming" you prefer like heats and ruts and pheromones to be/have an effect on you

And like, yandere and not wanting anyone else besides you or not, I'm sure like he has plenty of fans right but he probably intimidates the fuck out of most people so, you know, he probably intimidates most Alphas too

You're helping him in his office and you can tell he's got a bad migraine from being light sensitive and suddenly you're overwhelmed with the urge to rub his back and ask if he needs anything. You're bringing the man food and drinks every so often and make sure to ask him when he's got enough sleep. One may think, "oh you're a submissive Omega serving and obeying your Alpha" nah son YOU'RE the Alpha and like yeah you are being just nice and compassionate but, you're PROVIDING for him

Fucking nesting ass Miguel. It depends on preference since with ABO sometimes you know, Things Are Different Downstairs, we all need a little girldick from time to time, but, him developing the nesting instincts not even for himself he's like preparing for YOU to be pregnant. Scurrying around making sure his home is well stocked and rationed up like he's a squirrel storing for the winter because, he doesn't want his Alpha to not be able to soothe all her cravings 🥺🥺🥺 that would make him a Bad Terrible Horrible Omega and also you need the utmost care for the baby/babies/pups/whatever word you prefer

The pheromone bombing, godddd. Even if you're still mad and upset I imagine from a biological standpoint that it would at least like, help your body stop like reacting to any negative stress, like how you can be anxious or you can be Anxious Anxious where you're literally having heart palpitations and your chest feels tighter, like, he doesn't want his Alpha to be too stressed 🥺 you want him to bake you some sopapillas or something?

Lyla all "heyyyyy call me crazy but I think judging by the way Reader is so antsy and stockin up on food lately that SOMEONE is about to have their rut ;) maybe you should pop on for a visit"

Miguel: I dunno if I should

Lyla: why, because its questionably ethical and she might sleep with you when she's not in the right state of mind?

Miguel: no because what if I can't please her in bed and she doesn't like me 🥺👉👈

This man sees you holding Mayday ONCE and suddenly he's got a mental catalogue with all the different ways your potential babies could look. Would you let him name any of them Gabriella after his daughter or Gabriel after his brother? Would they have your eyes or his? Hair color? What if you spit out an Alpha with his height? Or maybe you two would have cute Omega babies just like their mom. He's just sitting there mentally going 🥰🥰🥰 while Lyla is snapping her fingers in front of his face "Hey, Hey, Earth to Planet DILF, you've never even kissed her yet, buddy"

Your rut hits and you're isolated in your Nueva York cyberpunk apartment which or course he has the pass key for and, "oh gosh Reader are you ok-- oh no you're suddenly pushing me down and ripping my clothes off, oh noooOoooOoo I sure hope you don't get prrrrregante, I didn't bring any protection 👉👈 *wink wink*"

#yandere miguel o'hara #yandere x reader #yandere spiderverse #sinprompts #yandere stuff

[alicegokugirl]

Idiot (one shot drable)

pairing - pah-chin x AFAB!reader

warnings - nsfw // minors dni // fatphobic insults //squirting // mentions of milfs // mentions of stepcest in pornography

author's note - my beautiful, underrated pah-chin loves you so much he can't help talking about you all the time. ♡

Everyone knows that Pah doesn't shut the fuck up about his girlfriend.

No, because it should actually be scientifically studied the way he can turn every single topic of conversation into something about you.

"Man, these pancakes are the best!"

- "My baby's taste way better."

"Fuck, I just know today is going to rain."

- "Better not, girlfriend's got a hair appointment at 2."

"Your bike needs some work, dude."

- "Whatever man, just make the handle pink so it matches m'lady's nails."

The girls love it, thinking it's adorable the way Pah is head over heels with you and wishing their own boyfriends talked about them like that when they weren't around.

On the other hand, the boys had already started developing eye problems from how many times they rolled them.

It might seem contradictory, but no one, not even the dumb ones, ever entertained the thought of telling Pah to shut up for one second.

Because between the ridiculous amount of useless information shared by the loose-lipped blond about your food allergies, your haircare routine and your favourite brand of toothpaste there were some precious gems.

Pah is not dumb at all... but he's definitely stupid.

And it only took someone slightly smarter than him to get him spilling out all the dirty details about your sex life (usually Kazutora).

So when there's nothing else to steal, destroy or graffiti, when the boys are bored out of their minds, Mikey signals to Kazutora to bring out the porn mag they stole from Shinichiro sometime ago.

And with a loud, exaggerated sigh and a purposeful slam of the magazine against a nearby low table, story time begins and the all the young men gather around.

"Shit- This one is hot." Kazutora points at the wrinkled page that illustrated an older woman getting pounded from behind by a younger man.

"Stop with the fucking milfs nobody likes them except you." Smiley slapped Kazutora's hand away and turned the page. "Nah. This shit is way hotter."

"Hell no, man! Stepcest again? You're so fucking weird." Draken shoves the two men aside and opens the magazine on a random page.

"Fuuuuuuuck yeah..."

"Finally, some good fucking food."

"Shit! I'm getting horny."

Groans of approval were heard throughout the hideout as the boys contemplated the picture of a blond woman, laying down on a white bed with white, fluffy sheets, legs open and hand between them, shoving two fingers inside what had to be the wettest pussy they have ever seen.

"Bet it squirts." Mitsuya says looking above Draken's shoulder.

"Big brain Mitsuya." Baji commented.

"Bet it leaves the whole bed soaking after you feed her a bit of this!" Mikey gets up and grabs his crotch.

"Gross dude."

"Hahaha~"

"My babe does it better."

Bingo.

And just like that, the ruckus was happily quieted down by Pah-chin's comment.

"Really, Pah? We don't believe it..." Sanzu teases, a shit eating grin on his face.

"Yo- Pah might be a jackass but he ain't no liar." Peh-yan jumps to defend his friend.

"Damn right. If I tell ya'll my girl can squirt buckets, you better believe my dick gets fucking wet everytime we fuck." He says, punching the table hard.

"Jesus, calm down bro. We believe you." Mitsuya awnsers.

"Yeah, it's just hard to believe you can make your girl squirt." Kazutora intervenes, hoping to get Pah to share a bit more about his hot girlfriend.

"Well, yeah it's not hard when you have a canon like mine and a pretty pussy like hers."

"Really? Who would have thought?" Kazutora faked innocence.

"Yeah, you virgin fucks have no idea what's like having a pair of fat tits bouncing on your face while a girl like my babe is making a mess on your cock." Pah crosses his arms and leans back, a proud smile adorned his face.

"Fuck yeah, we don't. Tell us more." Mikey provokes.

"Imagine this, virgins. My good girl, her tight pussy, and the biggest fucking mess. Nah, cause when I tell ya'll there's not one time when I fuck her that she doesn't squirt you better believe me. Last time- and hear me out- I was tongue deep in her. The thickest fucking thighs almost suffocating me. Can you imagine? A hot girl like my darling riding your face?"

"Not really, something more detailed might help." Kisaki said, pushing his glasses up his nose in a way that hid the blush creeping up his cheeks.

"Then listen to me, four-eyes. She is so fucking thick my hands could barely take hold of her ass. Not like I really could anyways. My baby is a freak and everytime she sits down she rides. And call me a fucking fatass but when I have a meal, I feast. Man, I had been eating her out for an hour when her legs just started shaking. She started telling me she had to pee or something but I had the best earmuffs and could hear jack shit. Next thing I know, I had my pretty pussy squirting all over my face."

"Damn..." Mikey whispers.

"Hell yeah. If my girl doesn't end up passing out on me after we fuck than I don't want it. Damn... just thinking about her cute clit swollen and lips all puffy is making me hungry again. Nothin' beats that view, virgins."

"Doubt. You could show us." Hanma says, optimistically.

"AND VIOLATE MY GIRL'S PRIVACY LIKE THAT? YOU DISRESPECTING MY GIRL? WANNA FIGHT?"

"Damn, fatty. Just askin'."

"Whatever, bean pole. I'm outta of here. Gonna let my Queen sit on her throne today." He says, getting up and walking out the hide out, closing the door with a loud bang.

Immediately everyone looked at Hanma.

"Stupid fuck."

"You had to ruin it, dumbass."

"Kill yourself, bro."

"You sleep outside today, idiot."

"Whatever. I'm one free popsicle coupon away from getting those videos and I'm not going to share."

i take requests from multiple fandoms. ♡

#anime #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers smut #tokyorev smut #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyorev x reader #pah-chin #pah-chin x reader #haruki hayashida #haruki hayashida x reader #pah-chin smut #haruki hayashida smut

[strangemaleswaps]

Strange Bully Swap

Sumit:

I hopped out of my car in the high school parking lot and grabbed my backpack from the seat. I'm glad I was graduating soon, but a little sad because I'd miss everyone so much. I wouldn't consider myself "popular" in the normal sense. But a lot of people knew me and I tried to be friends with everyone, despite being a shy guy. 

As I walked to the entrance, my best friend Thomas approached me from the left.

"Hey bro! Did you hear about the new kid?"

"Nah, what about him?"

"They say he was kicked out of his old school because of 'bad behavior' or something. But not like actually fighting people. Like threatening."

"What, like he's gonna kill them?"

"Probably. But the school board thought that was bad enough so they kicked him out." Thomas laughed. He'd been my best friend since I moved to this town in 6th grade. He could be a little harsh at times, but somehow we've stayed friends even through high school.

"That's weird yeah."

Bently:

In every one of my fucking classes the teacher had to introduce me all formal like. I hated it so much. Can't I just show up and go on my way?

My old school had people I actually knew and friends I actually liked. But I just HAD to tell this one loser off within earshot of a teacher and they had me expelled. It's not like I was going to do anything! Now I need to start a whole new reputation. One girl I hated from my old school was already telling people what happened so I was fucked from the start. Guess I'll have to sit alone at lunch once again.

Sumit:

The new guy wasn't in any of my classes but my heart dropped when we saw him at lunch. Now that I got a good look, I recognized him. I knew him all too well.

"You good?" I looked up to Thomas's concerned face.

"The new guy. I know him. His name is Bently."

"Yeah I know. He was in my class earlier. When people tried to approach him he like faked a punch." He shook his head. "What a weirdo. Wait, how do you know him?"

"He went to my old school. Middle school. He was a bully that basically made my life hell."

"What? That guy?" He glanced over at Bently sitting alone, then back at me. "But dude, but you're bigger than him."

"Well yeah, I am now. But back then I used to be tiny and wimpy. I remember him towering over me, and that's why I was easy prey. I was scared out of my mind being around him.

"Oh man. But you could totally take him on now though! Smack him!" He threw an air punch.

"Yeah. It's weird though. He was super popular before. He had that kind of outgoing personality that attracted people just like that. Well, other jerks that is. That's why we never got along."

"You really don't need to be an extrovert to be popular though. I mean just look at you! Half the school knows who you are and you're a turtle."

"I mean." I lifted up my shirt slightly. "I got abs too so that's probably why." He stared at me intensely like I said something wrong, but then we both started laughing our asses off.

"True! True!"

"I guess he finally got what he deserved after all this time."

"He's a real loser now. Sits at a table all by himself." Thomas smirked. We noticed Bently had dropped a napkin under the table and got down on all fours to pick it back up. When he extended his arm, his shirt went up, exposing a flabby belly.

"Oh shit dude, he's not only a loser now. He's fat!"

"No way."

"Yes way! Look at that flabby gut. Dude hides all his fat under the shirt. Wouldn't be surprised if he wore a fucking bra too!"

It was then that Bently revealed he was listening. It seems he couldn't take it anymore and walked over to our table with a show of rage on his face. Thomas looked up and started laughing again.

"Can I help you pick out a bra size mister?"

He curled up his fist, about to throw a punch, when I shouted at him.

"Hey Bently! Remember me?" He turned his head in my direction instead. I was feeling abnormally brave and angry at that moment. Maybe it was because I knew I had already won? We stared at each other for a few seconds when he spoke up.

"No."

"I'm Sumit." He took a long look at me when his eyes widened. I could tell he recognized me then.

"No way. Suckass Sumit?"

"Yep. But your bullying days are over so just give it a rest and leave everyone alone." I'm honestly surprised I managed to say that.

"Or what?" I stood up and got face to face with him.

"Or I'll mess you up," I said, alot louder than I wanted to. I may have had a better body than him, but I was no fighter. I was expecting him to throw a punch but instead he did a much dumber move - he knocked our heads together. It hurt like hell and we both fell over. I must've blacked out for a minute because when I got up, the principal had appeared; he was clearing the area and talking to Thomas.

"Are you alright?" He asked me.

"I'm ok."

"Thank you for not retaliating. It takes courage to not fight back. As for you Mr. Wilson," he turned to look at Bently, who was just standing up, "I will let you off this one time because it's your first day but one more screw up and it's detention."

As soon as the principal walked away, Bently came up to me once again.

"This isn't over asshole. Get fucked." He turned away.

"Wow, there's a real grade A asshole." Thomas put his hand on my shoulder. "Guess he's just jealous. I almost feel bad for him. Almost!" He started laughing again.

"Yeah, but my head still hurts."

"Eh, put some ice on it probably."

Bently: 

Fuck me. I should not have done that. I could've easily thrown a punch but he was just so in my face! I think I relied on my instincts. Stupid! Stupid! The rest of the day seemed to drag on and I could feel people laughing at me behind my back. This is really my life now isn't it? I headed home, and immediately to my room. Since my mom was out of town for the weekend, I didn't even bother trying to make any food so I just went to sleep, hoping that Saturday would be more tolerable.

Sumit:

At the end of the day, I went back home, hung out and played some Mario Kart with Thomas, and went to bed. My head wasn't hurting anymore so I was ready to enjoy my Saturday. But, all I could think about that night was Bently and what his problem was. I kinda felt bad for him. Who knows what his life was like?

Bently: 

I woke up feeling pretty energized, which was strange because that never happens. I reached my hand over for the glass of water on my bedside table, my eyes still closed, but found nothing. That's weird. I moved my hand around to find the table itself but still found nothing. I opened my eyes then and looked around to find a completely different bedroom. What the fuck? It was then that I noticed my hand was much darker than what I was used to. I checked out my whole arm and noticed how muscular it seemed. No fucking way. I investigated my body further and found I was wearing clothes that I didn't own so I decided to lift up my shirt to see what it looked like. I had fucking abs!

I grazed my hand along and they felt hard, completely different than the soft flab I was used to. Man I don't know what happened, but I like it! Wait, what do I look like? The bedroom wasn't mine but luckily it had a mirror on the wall. I took my shirt off and gazed into my reflection. Holy fuck.

I'm an Indian guy? Wait…shit. I'm that one guy from yesterday. The one I beat up…or tried to anyway. I leaned closer and touched my face. He's not all that bad looking actually. Wait what am I saying? That guy sucks! But still he has a nice body. I could feel myself getting hard within the sweatpants I was wearing. Maybe I won't think about who I am if I don't look in the mirror. I proceeded to the nearby bathroom and took out his member. Holy fuck he's huge! I rubbed one out, switching between nipple twists and rubbing my abs the whole time. I don't know how I swapped bodies with him, but all I know is that I'm in no rush to change back. This is gonna to be a fun weekend…

Sumit:

When I woke up the next day, I definitely did not feel rested. It felt like I barely got any sleep at all. I scratched the back of my head but noticed something was off. My hair was longer again? I had just got it cut so it was pretty noticeable. I opened my eyes and was very confused when I found I wasn't in my own bedroom. I didn't even recognize the room at all. It was kinda messy and there was a weird scent in the air - which was a stark contrast to my spotless bedroom.

When I tried to sit up I felt a weird feeling. It was sort of a jiggle? I looked down and saw how pale my arms were. What's going on? Am I dying? I made the mistake of touching my chest. It felt…squishy. Oh god. I lifted up my shirt and saw a flabby mess. What happened to my body?! I jumped off the bed, the saggy flesh shuffling with me. My belly drooped a bit below my sweatpants, and the place where I once had pecs, were now wobbly bags of meat. I leaned over and watched them hang down.

I went crazy and slapped my belly, watching all the flab go nuts. This can't be happening! I walked over to a nearby mirror and almost puked when I saw who I was. I….I'm Bently.

What happened?! I made weird facial expressions and shook my belly again. I turned to the side to feel my ass around, and found it was equally as blubbery as the rest of my body. What did I do to deserve this? Oh no, what does my dick look like? I pulled down my sweatpants to see the damage. Oh god, it was…tiny. I have a tiny dick! Maybe it's a grower? I sure hope so! What am I going to do now though? Thankfully it was a weekend so I didn't have to go to school like this, but I needed to figure out how this happened. In the meantime, I was a little curious to see what it would be like to jerk with someone else's dick…

#strangemaleswaps #body swap #male body swap #male tf #weight gain

[belliesandburps]

Demonic Burp-Off (Sadao & Urushihara burping fic)

Well, it's been a good hot minute since I posted up any kink fics on tumblr. And since I just finished this reward fic on patreon, I thought I'd post it up here, because who doesn't love some gassy demonic part-timers? ;)

“BWRRROOOooooouuuurrrrp!!!!!!”

A monstrous belch bellowed loudly and forcefully from within the Demon Lord's one-bedroom “”Castle.”” When it ended, Sadao sighed boorishly and slumped back on the ground, shamelessly patting his very bloated belly in relief.

“Whew! Ohhh man, I'm stuffed...” Sadao moaned, running his hand up and down his glutted gut. The young demon lord was in his usual home-attire; a t-shirt and his boxers, but due to just how much he'd packed away, his shirt was riding up almost just below his chest, completely showing off the near-entirety of his soft, bulging belly.

“Sire, if I may? You've been eating quite a bit lately,” Ashiya mused like a nervous spouse, eyeing his companion and masters overstuffed middle.

“Dude, the fridge is full t'bursting, SOMEONE has to clear it out,” Sadao insisted whilst massaging his hefty, burbling midsection contently.

“Tch, it's not the only one full to bursting though,” Urushihara muttered in his usual bored brand of snark as he browsed the computer and took a sip of soda.

As if to punctuate that point, a thick gurgle bellowed deep from Sadao's belly, making him wince for a moment before another large, rumbling burp erupted heavily from past his lips. “Oof, no argument there...” Sadao grunted as he palmed the side of his belly, causing it to jiggle quite visibly with the impact.

Something Ashiya most definitely noticed, along with Sadao's new curves...

“Sire, it might behoove you to at least pace yourself so you don't eat everything all at once, wouldn't you say? What if your current...erm...'expansion' were to compromise your position at work?”

Sadao just rolled his eyes, making Ashiya frown and turn to Urushihara, who was downing even more soda.

“Urushihara, would you make yourself useful and help me out here, please?”

“Ugh...suck...” the young, purple-haired demon remarked as he rubbed his stomach from under his shirt, ignoring Ashiya's ask. “Too much soda...” he mumbled before he lurched with a long, throaty belch of his own. It completely silenced Ashiya and left the youngest demon smacking his lips contently.

“Whoa, not bad, dude!” Sadao mused in amusement, making Ashiya scowl.

“Sire, PLEASE don't encourage Urushihara's bad behavior,” Ashiya insisted, adding, “his table manners are appalling as is.”

“Tch, what the crap??” Urushihara whined back defensively. “If you're gonna nag at somebody, nag at HIM, you kiss-ass. He's the one who's been burping his fat ass off all day.”

“Whadduya expect? I ate a ton!” Sadao said in a slightly less defensive tone than the younger demon, who opened his mouth to say something before Sadao added, “And if you say I WEIGH a ton too, I'll slam your head through that computer screen, you punk.”

Urushihara paused, then closed his mouth and turned back to his computer. “Whatever...” he said before downing more soda. Like clockwork, another big, brassy burp blasted out of Urushihara's mouth; rather impressive, given how petite and skinny he was. He shamelessly smacked his lips and sighed briskly, earning a snicker from Sadao and a groan of annoyance from Ashiya.

Sadao, meanwhile, huffed as he leaned back and tugged his boxers down ever so slightly, showing off a bit of his hips and more of his bulging underbelly, letting it breathe more. “Oof...man, I really did overdo it today, huh...” Sadao mumbled as he slowly ran his hands up and down his swollen stomach.

Ashiya watched his young lord massage his ample beachball of a belly and frowned with concern. “You're not feeling ill, are you, sire?”

Sadao shook his head and said, “Nah, just-” before he could finish, his cheeks puffed out, and a moment later, he threw his head with another huge burp. It blasted out of him so hard that it made his belly physically jostle from the force of the pressure erupting out of him. He grunted and palmed his chest, knocking loose a thick afterburp. “...Oof...maybe a lil gassy though...”

“I imagine that's to be expected with an excessive influx of grease and additives burbling within your digestive sys-”

-Aaaand of course, poor Ashiya couldn't even finish his boring thought, an even bigger burp bellowed from Urushihara, who moaned in a deeply satisfied manner afterward.

“Ohhhh man, that felt good...” he moaned out, rubbing his flat belly as he did.

“It might feel even better to not to constantly CHUG the sodas down like they're going to magically disappear if you don't drink them down all at once,” Ashiya groused in annoyance with Urushihara's outburst, who literally couldn't care less if his demonic life depended on it.

But Sadao, on the other hand, had a different idea, judging from the rather impish grin spreading over his lips.

“Heh, not bad, dude. But let's see ya top THIS,” Sadao insisted as he grabbed the weighty mass in his middle and jiggled it up and down. Ashiya could practically hear all that digesting junk food in Sadao's belly sloshing around heartily.

Though, it was hard to hear much at all after that since all that jostling eventually rustled loose a gas bubble that rushed violently up Sadao's throat. The burp that Sadao let echo throughout his tiny apartment was positively gigantic.

Sadao huffed, then gripped his bulging belly tightly with one hand and leaned forward with another deep, raunchy belch, followed by a much smaller one; that monstrous pocket gave way to residual pockets of gas rolling out of Sadao one after the other. When it finally ended, Sadao sighed heavily, tongue hanging out of his maw like a panting dog as he said, “WHEW! Heh, that one was brewin' for a good while, man, damn...” He gave his belly a couple of hearty pats of satisfaction, causing the soft, round organ to jiggle with each pat he gave it.

Ashiya rang his ear out and frowned. “Your majesty, honestly-”

“-Tch, I could beat that in my sleep,” Urushihara insisted, much to Ashiya's dismay; any hope of these two acting less boorish quickly being dashed away.

The purple-haired boy grabbed another can of soda, popped the top, and immediately started guzzling it down. His slender throat throbbed in and out as he gave one rather audible gulp after another. Urushihara was chugging so intensely that he clenched his eyes shut while his tiny nostrils flared up.

As he chugged, he rubbed his flat stomach up and down; a sliver of his pale flesh peaking from the bottom of his t-shirt. His flat middle was bowing out just ever so slightly, likely from downing two sodas so fast. Amazingly, Urushihara managed to chug the whole thing in one go, though given the fact that the young demon could literally swallow people whole, it wasn't exactly surprising that he'd have a strong gag reflex.

Urushihara crushed the can in his hand as he swallowed the last of the soda in his mouth with one especially hearty gulp, causing a sizable lump to travel down his throat and vanish behind his pronounced collarbone. The demon boy huffed heavily, then grabbed his belly firmly with one hand and threw his head back as an utterly deafening belch exploded past his rippling lips. All that air and carbonation came blasting forth with such power that Urushihara could practically feel the reverberation ratting his bones. Both Sadao and Ashiya could feel the ground itself vibrate a little with that one.

It was only a few seconds long, but the sheer volume was unmatched by anything either demon had let loose up to that point.

Sadao's jaw gaped as that insanely brassy eructation finally rumbled to a finish. “...Okay, that was actually pretty damn good...”

Urushihara groaned in an exerted manner as he rubbed his throat and mumbled, “Ugh, that one hurt...” before putting a hand to his chest and letting loose a long, throaty afterburp. Catching his breath, he smirked back at Sadao and said, “And that's why I'm the champ. Don't quit your day job, dude,” before turning his back on the two elder demons and going back to his computer. “...No, but seriously, don't quit 'cuz no one else makes money...”

At that, Ashiya's gaze hardened.

“The sheer disrespect...!”

Sadao shrugged dismissively and said, “Nah, there's no way in hell I could ever top tha-AAAUH?!?” But Sadao's dismissal became a cry of confusion when Ashiya was suddenly perched right before him and grabbing his bare, bulging belly. “D-Dude! What the hell're you-”

“-Crude and repulsive or not, for ANY lesser demon to act superior to the demon lord in ANY capacity is utterly unacceptable!” Ashiya declared before holding the sides of Sadao's big belly with both hands and heaving it up and down. The glutted lightly tanned ball of flesh jiggled and sloshed heavily as all that digesting slurry within the organ swished around within. The action was so confusing that even Urushihara had to turn and look at the commotion.

Sadao winced rather uncomfortably from all the jostling. “D-Dude, cut it out! You're making me nauseeEOOOOUUUrrrph!!!!” His protests were cut short by a wet burp that cut him off mid-sentence and left him covering his mouth.

“Yeaaaah, you realize you're gonna make him puke if you keep doing that, right? And I am NOT cleaning that up...”

“The Demon Lord's strength of will won't allow him to be so easily bested, you little wretch!” Ashiya declared before turning to an increasingly nauseous Sadao. “Sire, whatever you do, hold it in! Do not eruct until the time is right,” Ashiya insisted as he continued forcefully shaking Sadao's belly.

The young raven-haired devil lurched, going a bit green in the proverbial gils as his bouncing gut began gurgling and burbling rather intensely. His abused stomach churned so violently that it sounded like a witch's cauldron over a roaring flame. Sadao wanted to burp so badly, but he was worried that if he did at this point, a lot more than gas would come rushing up...

Of course, with Ashiya jiggling his belly so relentlessly, a lot more might just come back up anyway...

Eventually, however, there was a thick, telltale gurgle, indicating that the time was nigh...

*GWWWWUUUUUUOOOOOOOORRRGLE!!!!!*

Sadao's round belly bubbled so aggressively that it jostled in Ashiya's grasp. The eldest demon grinned said, “This is it, sire! Get ready!”

Poor Sadao almost whimpered, knowing what was coming next.

And before he could properly brace himself, Ashiya SHOVED his hands right against the dead center of Sadao's hefty belly. His palms sank into Sadao's soft, weighty flesh.

Sadao's eyes bugged out of his skull as he felt an intense volume of pressure quickly rushing up from his chest and quickly rushing up his throat.

His cheeks puffed out like balloons, and before he even had a chance to stop it, the gates of hell were wide open...

And out exploded a beastly eructation unlike any other...

“BWWRRRRRUUUUUUOOOOHHH-HHOOOORRRRRRRROOOOOOORRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUPH!!!!!!!!!”

The entire apartment rumbled aggressively as Sadao released a tremor-inducing BELCH of record-shattering magnitude. That wasn't hyperbole either; debris and dust actually crumbled from the ceiling and corners of the apartment as Sadao burped harder and louder than he'd ever burped in his centuries-long (young for a demon) life. Ashiya pushed his palms deeper into Sadao's belly, prolonging that tonsil-destroying eruption for a staggering ten, uninterrupted seconds straight, only getting louder the longer all that gas blasted out from his rippling lips, along with several strands of saliva.

When it finally...mercifully rumbled to a sharp close, Sadao was utterly dazed and winded. Going cross-eyed, the bloated boy just toppled onto his back. His fat belly wobbling heavily over him as he laid there like an immensely bloated ragdoll.

Both Ashiya and Urushihara stared at their downed demon lord in silence for a few moments, before a wide grin spread over Ashiya's face.

“AHA! Excellent work, my liege! You completely trounced that little brat and reminded him why you're the strongest demon in all the land! Well played! Disgusting...but well played!” Ashiya exclaimed, eagerly patting Sadao's jiggly belly in congratulations.

“You're not wrong about the 'disgusting' part,” Urushihara muttered, crinkling his little nose as he fanned the air around him. “...Also, I'm pretty sure you just killed him.”

Ashiya scoffed before glancing back at Sadao, who, again, was just laying there in a motionless, lifeless daze.

Experimentally, Ashiya pushed on Sadao's belly...

“UUUUrrrOOOOOrrrP!”

As the push forced out one last heavy burp from Sadao, Ashiya grinned.

“See? He's fine!”

Finally, Sadao managed to speak up.

“...N-Next time the fridge is fuuUuorp...guh...f-full...I'm okay with us just tossing it out instead...”

#sadao #urushihara #belly kink #burping #overstuffed #soda chugging #flat stomach #burping contest #post stuffing #fat belly #weight gain #belly play #belly sloshing #gassy #comedy #oh yeah join my patreon if you'd like your own reward fics #you didn't think i'd post patreon content without shilling didja? #i am the one who shills

[darylthekidd]

i don't care much for dogs

pairing: aizawa shouta x puppy girl!reader

summary: shou never thought that he'd be up for adopting a dog. they were clingy, hyper, dumb, and gross. or so he thought.

warnings:

this had to be a joke, right? the one time eraserhead steps away from his patrol for the night, he's gotta be the hero again. well, according to himself anyway.

you were just chilling, huddled into your dingy, makeshift bed that you had long outgrown. here in the Tourism Sector of the city. you must've been dodged by a previous caretaker.

not that shouta was looking, but he noticed how you looked. your adorable ears, hidden poorly in your sparkly, dewy fro. you had on simple tops and bottoms but he wondered if that shake was real. your small, chubby self just perched so cutely, he didn't like dogs but he would tolerate them for you.

as he took a step to try and wake you, he heard a meek growl sound from you. had you been awake this whole time? you must be a light sleeper.

"m'not drunk 'n' m'not going back to the hold. not with you." the girl mumbled, shouta just bent down a little to see her a bit more. he was treated to the smell of dog mixed with a fading perfume. it was a strange smell.

"hey. i'm eraserhead. can you tell me if you're alright?"

you peaked up at him, your nose all ashy and twitchy. dehydration. "if you come any closer, i'll rip your heart out through your chest. stay back. what do you want?"

the whiplash?!?

shouta just fought the urge to be irritated by some random pup being rude. this dog probably had ran away rather than be dumped if the way she watched him was any sign.

"are you alright?"

"yea, m'fine. do i need'ta move?"

the way your cheeks seemed to fluff out as you glared at him sent flutters into his throat. you were kinda cute. if he had any say in it, he would've offered to become a very temporary caretaker for you. he still wasn't too much of a fan of dogs.

shouta shook his head, "nah, as long as you're okay. i'm a hero and i want to help."

she lowered her body back down, still keeping her eyes trained on shouta's silhouette through the dark.

"i'm trying to stay on the low. i'm running from a big hero corporation. thanks but no thanks."

he was right. "okay. i'm gonna go then. make sure you stay safe out here."

he wasn't sure why he said that, but as he left the cute, little, floppy-eared hybrid as per her request, he felt differently than he had maybe a few minutes ago.

if he's being honest, he would've forgotten all about that random late night interaction. in fact he did. that was until he saw her again during his mission. she was out, but he suspected that the bloody tears in her skin were from tranquilizers. if she was any bit as fierce as she was when he first saw her, she probably gave the kidnappers hell right back, if not worse.

"okay, you watch her while i go get the boss. careful, she bites. fat bitch."

"she is chubby and she is a female dog. that's literally what you're saying. or do you mean it as an insult?"

the goon just smacked his lips, aggressively sighing while throwing his arms up. "dude. stop bringing your weird ass simp feminism bullshit up. literally nobody cares, it was just a joke, bro."

shouta wanted to punch his lights out, but he was undercover as a neutral party investor. he couldn't let them see him fight. so he just nodded and let the subject fall for the moment.

"sure.. i don't care."

"if she wakes up or even looks like she's getting ready to move-" the goon pointed to the tranquilizer darts and gun sat on a window sill behind shouta's head, "-shoot her with that. it's the only way we can safely show her to folks. she usually just tries to scratch off people's faces. we wouldn't want your face ruined since you're such a good investor, mr. mooney."

as soon as the greasy asshole left, shouta stretched and got relaxed on the only clean couch. if it took as long to find and get the ringleader to see him as it usually did, shou was going to just catch some sleep.

"eraserhead? you're here, too?"

shouta's eyes shot to see the short, dog hybrid sitting up. he hadn’t notice before but while her eyes were wrapped, her cute, little, floppy ears still poked through her now unkempt hair.

"yea. i'm undercover. i need you to not expose me, please."

"ow! what the fuck?"

before he could ask her anything, in the way she cradled in to herself, shouta could just barely see a blackened burn. a branding, probably. not a great sign, but not as bad as it could be.

"they fucking burned me." tears streamed down her face, "and i fucking hurt everywhere. oww..."

ok, so the situation is worsening. "i promise my colleagues and i will help you out, but i need you to be quiet."

"...do you need to put me out again? if they find out i'm up, they won't be so easy with you. i can take it, but i don't know what you do as a hero so i'm not so sure how much you can take."

"no need to worry. just trust me. okay?"

#x chubby reader #aizawa x reader #x reader #x black reader #x poc reader #bnha x plus size reader #bnha x poc!reader #mha x you #bnha x you #mha x y/n #mha x reader #mha x black reader #bnha x y/n #aizawa imagine #shoto aizawa #mha aizawa

[hetaologist]

World Meeting (pt. 1)

England: *Enters the meeting room* Right, I want to address a particular Tweet as today’s meeting topic…

*All Nations stop what they’re doing to look at England*

England: Just last week, I read a Tweet from a *specific* individual, talking shit about my food.

*All Nations groan, America snickers to himself*

England: *Narrows eyes at America*, I’ll have you know, my ‘Pie and Mash’ is a good, hardy meal and a British classic!

America: *Stands from his desk with a cheeky grin* Come on dude, don’t tell me you actually look forward to eating dry ass meat pies covered in nuclear green gravy and a side of wall paste~. *He laughs mischievously*

England: WHY YOU CHEEKY BAST-

France: *Clears his throat* Mon amie~, I’m forced to agree with America…unfortunately.”

England: *Snaps his head towards France* WHAT!? Says you, you snail sucker! Your food is overrated and overly complicated to make.

France: *Clutches pearls* Sacré bleu, you heathen! At least my food is desired for and doesn't make people fat, no~?!

*America and England both glare at France*

America: Excuse me bro...?

*Germany stands up and places hands on table*

Germany: Now's not the time to talk about frivolous topics as such. The three of you, sit down und shut up!

America: Hmph, says you. You think it's perfectly okay to eat boiled sausages with boiled potatoes and noodles with no seasonings.

*Germany gasps and gets taken a back*

Germany: DON'T TALK SCHEISSE ABOUT MY FOOD, YOU LARD COVERED ARSCHLOCH!

France: And no, covering everything in mustard or paprika doesn't count~.

*Germany is fuming like a hot baked potato*

England: Hehe~. Now you know how I feel in this situation, you bland Kraut!

America: HAHA! And your beer tastes terrible~.

*Everyone deadass looks at America*

America: What?

Russia: That's some bold words coming from you, Америка~. Germany's beer is pretty good, your beer tastes like man pissed into bottle before closing it.

America: HEY! At least my food is well seasoned and diverse...

China: Yeah right, your shit is just our stuff but with too much sugar and salt.

*All Nations nod their head in agreement*

America: No it isn't! I just like lots of flavor....

*England looks over at America's Stanley cup on his desk*

England: I bet that coffee cup is filled to the BRIM with pure sugar and syrups, you fat ass.

America: Nah dude, it's filled with my *:･ﾟ✧special sauce*:･ﾟ✧.

*America opens up his giant cup filled with sauce*

America: It's a combination of ranch, hot sauce, chicken tender sauce, tangy BBQ sauce, ketchup, mustard, mayo, bacon bits, chipotle, sour cream, sweet n' sour and chili sauce~.

*Everyone looks in horror at America's concoction*

England: What in the ACTUAL FUCK AMERICA ?! Why do you have a huge ass cup of JUST SAUCE?!

America: To quench my thirst, of course!

*Everyone's jaw drops in disgust, some start to gag*

Russia: I should have bombed you when I had chance...

America: Nah, I'm just playing! It's for my chicken tenders.

*America pulls out a box of fast food chicken tenders out of coat pocket*

Germany: WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT WITH YOU?!

America: It's my snackies :3c , this is the sauce I use for everything! Like tacos, burgers, pizza...

*North Italy faint after hearing 'pizza'. South Italy gasps and tends to his brother.*

South Italy: You sick fuck, you always fuck up our beloved pizza and pasta!

America: Wha- no I don't!

South Italy: You are the bastard that put pineapple on pizza and fucked it all-a up!

America: Actually, that's Canada's invention...

South Italy: WHAT?!

*Everyone looks at Canada*

Canada: ...damn it. It's really not that bad, honestly.

South Italy: You're just as bad as your brother!

Canada: Fair...

*America gets on the desk and stands on it*

America: How about we once and for all decide who has the best food in the world and that person can talk all the shit they want about other countries food!

*All Nations agrees to the motion, except for Germany*

Germany: Gott in Himmel... *facepalms*

(to be continued...)

#hetalia #hetalia world stars #hetalia axis powers #hetalia headcanons #aph america #aph england #aph france #aph germany #aph russia #aph china #aph italy

[happysaddca]

I'm gonna pretend this isn't as good cause I am feeling off today and not because I crammed like four different ideas into two scenes here and didn't flesh anything out as much as I would like normally.

There is some very, very mild suggestive flirting that goes nowhere.

I think I've got things worked out for Constellations Redeux now so drabbles like this will slow down in favor or working out other AUs/the actual story. But I'm still gonna need a beta reader :')

Oh, and your nickname from Sun is introduced here, so we're 3/4 on DCA nicknames. I'm not sure if it's noticeable, but I personally struggle if a fic overuses nicknames or explicitly says y/n or reader. So I avoid that as much as possible lol.

You barely make it three days before start worrying that Sun is angry with you. Moon’s reassurances can only work so long, especially since you have to work and sleep and sometimes even go home so your roommate knows you’ve not died and been turned into pizza. And with Sun and Moon back, your usual coping mechanisms only go so far. Still, you’re able to keep the seed from taking root for nearly two weeks. 

“How are they adjusting to being online again?” You’d been sent to fetch more flour from the main kitchen, where Anika is currently fussing with the pizza ovens. You’re avoiding going back upstairs, sneaking pepperoni slices every time her back is turned. 

“Okay as can be expected. Moon is still fronting every time I see them, even when it’s bright out.” Your mouth twitches and you rub at it absently, massaging the scars out of habit. “They haven’t Eclipsed at all since the restart, and Moon is mostly avoiding people. I think he’s nervous.” You pop a pepperoni in your mouth as Anika turns around. 

“Dude, don’t eat the product!” She rolls her eyes at you, going to wash her hands. “Between you and the other gremlins I work with, it’s amazing we have any food at all.” 

“You love us,” you say sing-song, but you pull away from the food, trailing after Anika. She turns and flicks you with water for your trouble. “Hey! You know I’m a witch. I’m gonna melt now and what are you gonna tell the Attendants?” 

“That I defeated the evil that eats all my pepperoni.” Another flick of water, and you give an overdramatic hiss, moving to hide behind Anika instead. 

“Cruelty, abuse, harassment. I should call HR on you now.” 

“Nah, I’ve got too much blackmail on you.” She shakes her hands dry and turns to lean against the sink and look you over. “You look less like a witch and more like a ghost. When’s the last time you’ve gone outside?”

“A couple days ago?” You are used to being stared at, but Anika has this uncanny way of making you feel like she’s not just looking, she’s peeling back the layers, clothes from skin, skin from fat, fat from muscle. Looking for something, something you decidedly don’t have. “I’ve been using the employee showers. Shockingly okay if you give them a good scrub first.” 

Her nose wrinkles anyway. “You know you have to go outside at some point. Your Sun and Moon won’t like you neglecting yourself for their sake. Neither will our Attendant for that matter.” 

“I haven’t even seen Sunny lately,” you complain, and a muscle twitches in your cheek. “I haven’t seen either Sun. What if they’re both—”

“Stop.” You open your mouth, but Anika holds her hand up. “Stop. I know this mental trainwreck far too well. Stop whatever oh they actually hate me mind game you’re playing and go talk to them.” 

“But the daycare is still open,” you protest weakly. Anika gives you a look. “I have to work?” 

“Then why are you down here eating all my pepperoni?” 

“Because you’re my friend and I was supposed to be getting flour,” you say slowly. “And friends let you avoid work to talk about relationship stuff?”

Anika rolls her eyes, walking around you and grabbing the massive bag of flour, shoving it in your arms with a grunt. “As your friend, I’m telling you not to let this fester. Talk to your Moon and Sun, and go see Sunny after work. And tomorrow, get the fuck out of this building. Sleep in an actual bed for eight hours and get some vitamin D.” 

You nod slowly, resisting the urge to pout, physically biting it back. “Okay. I will.” You pause before nodding again. “I will. Thank you Anika.” 

“You’re welcome. Now shoo. I have to test the oven and if it blows up I’d like to limit the casualties.” 

You do return to work, but it’s hard to concentrate when you want to skip the rest of your shift and find Moon. You text them, a quick reminder when you’re off, and proceed to overbeat your icing. You have to dump the ruined buttercream, starting over. It’s only a couple hours, but your attention is splintering fast, and by the time you can clock out, you’re itching to go.

“See you Alex! Sorry about dropping the fondant!” You get some mumble for a reply that’s completely missed as you open the back door and step out, directly into a hard exoskeleton and metal arms that catch you and wrap you in a hug. “Oh!”

“Hello to you as well. Where are you going in such a hurry?” Moon sounds amused even as it pulls you out of sight. “Did you have an appointment to get to?”

“I wanted to see you.” The unpleasant twinge in your stomach isn’t from getting dragged along. You reach up to flick the bell on Moon’s nightcap. “And Sun too, if they’re…” 

“She’s still resting.” Moon’s tone is apologetic even as you both stop near the back wall, out of sight of any but the nosiest of plex patrons. It cups your scarred cheek, leaning down for a kiss. “Starlight, you’re crying again.” A finger curls under your eye, catching a tear. 

“Sorry. I don’t mean to.” You try to wipe your eyes clear, but it just happens again as you chew on the inside of your cheek. “Can’t Sun come out, for just a little? I’ve not seen her since you were eclipsed. I know she’s there; the diagnostics are all fine and you wouldn’t lie b-but…” Shoot, now you were really starting to cry, and you tried to hide it, ducking your chin and covering your face with your hands. Moon’s fans have started alongside a click click clicking noise as it holds its hands out, servos popping. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry Moon. I know it’s been a lot for you two, but I miss… I miss both of you.” 

“Star,” Moon’s voice peters out as you can’t seem to slow your tears, or your words. 

“I’ve not seen Sunny from the daycare either, and I know it’s because I’ve been spending so much time with you — and that’s not complaining! If I didn’t have to work, I’d always be with you. But it feels like both Suns are avoiding me now and I get it’s dumb but… does Sun hate me?”

Moon’s hands settle on your shoulders featherlight, pulling you into a hug. “It’s going to be okay,” it says, and a shiver goes through its frame. You pull back in time to nearly get poked in your good eye with one of Sun’s rays. You stare blankly, voice gone as Sun straightens, one hand checking everything was in place before turning that blank, unmoving smile on you. 

“Sun?” you say in a small voice, and she nods, something clicking inside her headcase. You’re immediately reaching out, ignoring the sharp edges of the rays, feeling for any irregularities you’d missed before with Moon. “What’s wrong? Can’t you speak?”

“I’ve missed you.” She speaks so softly you nearly miss it. “I’m sorry Sunflower. I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you.” 

“Sun!” You hold her tightly, her rays digging into your arms before she can retract them. Their hands flutter over you before settling lightly on your back, barely touching you. “I’m sorry. I know you don’t. But we’ve been so worried about you.” You squeeze her more tightly to make up for the lack of a hug on Sun’s end. “Let me look at you. I want to see…” 

You pull back, hands sliding down Sun’s arms, curling into their sleeves just above their wrists. Sun watches you, but she holds still, rays remaining half retracted, an impression left from you. You have to wipe at your eyes again, realizing you’re still freely crying. “It looks like you took over easily enough. We don’t have the fiber optics in your clothes hooked up yet but—”

“Flower,” Sun says softly, and you quiet down, blinking hard. Sun’s hands shift, longer fingers tracing patterns on your inner forearms. “How can you tell anything when we look like this?” 

“Huh?” The confusion snaps you out of the lingering fog of upset. “Sun, it’s still you.” You reach forward, noticing Sun’s flinch before she holds still, letting you press your hand against one of the stuck rays. It pops out, nearly cutting your hand. “I know this isn’t ideal but… it’s. It’s still you in there.” You repeat the process twice more, until Sun is able to test them, ticking them in and out in a wave without them getting stuck. “We should oil those so when you come out they won’t get stuck like that.” 

“Flower.” 

You attempt a smile, playing with one of Sun’s rays, making it spring back and forth until Sun withdraws it completely. “I told you, your rays have always been your giveaway. We got to take care of them so they can keep giving you away.” Your giggle is a little manic, but a big hand covers your mouth and part of your jaw. You stare at Sun blankly, biting the inside of your cheek again. 

“How are you sure it’s us?” Sun asks again, her voice soft, nearly devoid of emotion. Her rays are half withdrawn, and you can tell they’re avoiding looking at your face. At least until you lick her palm. She jerks back in shock, staring at their hand, then you. “Sunflower, why! You don’t know what Moon’s been up to or the last time we washed our hands. You’ll get sick!” 

You smile and this time your laugh is far more genuine. You wipe at your mouth. “I’ll brush my teeth in a minute. How am I supposed to answer your questions when you won’t let me speak?” 

The rays pull back further in her head, and Sun looks away, wiping their palm clean on their pants. Your smile fades, and you lean forward, touching their knee. 

“I was worried we might’ve picked up the wrong chips,” you admit softly, scooting forward, wanting to touch as much of Sun as possible. “Anika had grabbed a bunch of different parts for Gemma to scan, but we were scared of waking you too early and giving you false hope. So there was this chance that something could go wrong. Gemma knew the spare body was safe enough but it wasn’t until you both came online that I really knew it was you and Moon. My Sun and Moon.” 

“But how? Other than our software, none of this is us.” Sun gestures vaguely at herself. “The clothes are close now, but we’re smaller, our faceplate is wrong and empty, our programming doesn’t map properly across these new actuators and servos.” 

“It feels bad, doesn’t it?” You aren’t able to properly smile, but you try anyway, lifting Sun’s faceplate to meet her eyes. This close, you can see the barest amount of light denoting where she’s looking. It’s not at you, but it’s close enough. “I’ve gone through the same thing. After the accident,” you ignore her flinch, “I had so many surgeries. Some of this skin on my face is from my thigh, you know. And some isn’t even from me.” You reluctantly touch the worst of your scars, the one that cuts over your eye. “I have metal pins in my arms and legs. Even my brain got damaged. I still don’t really know all the changes to my personality yet — hey, don’t look like that. This isn’t your or Moon’s fault.” You grab her face with both of your hands, squeezing it tightly, shaking her very gently. “Neither of you are allowed to blame yourself, okay? I’ll come in there if you do.” 

There’s a bubble of laughter from Sun, a hand catching and holding yours while her rays slowly extend. “And how will you manage that Flower?”

The laughter is infectious, and you giggle despite yourself. “I know you’ve not been fronting much, but I’ve made friends with some super smart people. We’ll upload my brain on the mainframe and inject it into your headspace so I can give you and Moon a proper chewing out. So unless you want to be stuck with me for all of eternity, you’ll get the idea this is your fault out of your mind.”

“How horrible would be to be trapped with you for all of eternity.” She pulls your hand over to her mouth, teeth pressing lightly against your palm. When you curl your fingers, tracing the length of their nose, her rays tick back and forth once again, fans whirring deep in her chest. 

“A nightmare even Moon won’t be able to save you from.” You take advantage of the moment, moving to crawl into Sun’s lap, back against her chest. If you lean back, you can watch her rays shift back and forth. Her arms settle slowly around you, still barely holding you. You have to tighten her arms around you yourself. “I know it’s a lot right now Sun, but Gemma is going to help make it easier. New pieces for your exoskeleton, better silicone. She’s currently working with another technician to recreate your old face. Anika’s other scavenged pieces are helping create some new code so you will control this endoskeleton more easily. It’ll be new, and it won’t quite be the same as before, but you’ll be in control of your body again. You’ll look like you again.” 

“You’re saying we will be like you? But there won’t be scars.” You shiver as Sun pulls her hands from yours, touching over your arm, pushing your sleeve out of the way. “We’ll look like our old selves.” 

“You can ask if you want to see,” you say, pulling Sun’s hand free. “Between the two of you I’m not sure if you’re trying to satisfy some morbid curiosity or get into my clothes.” 

“Sunflower.” She sounds scandalized, but there’s no true attempt at denial. 

“Besides, I think there will be scars. Maybe not as visible as mine, but… this isn’t easy.” 

“No.” It comes out like a sigh, and for the first time Sun hugs you tightly. “I don’t like feeling so lost Flower. We’ve lost everything.” 

She’s not entirely wrong. Her daycare, her body, the children she’d basically helped raise. They were all gone. 

“But you have Moon again.” 

Quiet except for the sounds of Sun working away inside, the pitch of her insides indicating a second opinion from Moon itself. “I do,” she finally says, her face dipping into your hair. “And we have you.” 

“And you have me,” you agree. You sigh, the sound dragging out all the tension from your shoulders and back. You ragdoll against Sun, and they hold you tightly, concerned until you give a smile. “We’ll figure it out. I promise Sun.” 

Sun is quiet, and when you look up, her rays are withdrawn again. They look away when they catch you staring, hands dropping away. 

“Sun,” you try again. “It’s all right if you don’t feel better.” 

“You can read me, even like this.” Sun’s chuckle is sad. “I don’t hate you. But I hate this. I hate being this.” Her hand lifts and drops again. “Moon is handling it a little better. That’s why it has been center stage.” 

“I understand,” you say. There’s a pang of pain deep in your heart and you gather her arms around you again. “If Moon is comfortable being in control, then… then I understand. But please don’t hide away all the time. I know, I know you don’t hate me but it can still be hard. Is that too much to ask for?”

You can hear and feel Sun shift, rays extending as her neck cricks to one side, thinking. “I think it’s all right,” they say finally. “I think Moon will appreciate the break too.” 

“Have you two been all right?” you ask, leaning your head back once again to watch Sun’s rays. She nods and then gives a little, uncertain shrug. 

“We have been talking. It’s so good for Moon to be itself again, but there’s still pain. And distance.” Sun’s voice flattens and cuts off before the end of their sentence, making her rays pop in and out in surprise. “Oh. That’s new.” 

“I think Moon disagrees with you.” You move slowly, pushing Sun’s legs wide so you can kneel between them and open your arms. Sun stares, rays still clicking in and out as a circle. “Come here.” 

“I’ll stab you with my rays. They aren’t flexible like my old ones.” 

“Don’t care.” You wiggle your fingers at her. “Come here.” Sun does eventually move into your arms, rays withdrawing so you can rest your chin on top of her faceplate. You squeeze her tightly again as her arms wind around your middle carefully. “You’re not going to break me,” you promise. “Everything’s all healed up now, even the brain stuff.” 

“You’re not as funny as you think you are.” Sun’s voice is muffled in your shoulder. 

“I’m hilarious. I learned from the best after all.” There’s a little giggle. “I’ve been working on my gymnastics too,” you add. “I can almost do a back flip.” 

“Oh really?” She sounds bemused. “You’ll have to show us sometime.” 

“You’ll need to hold my legs.” That got a proper snort, Moon and Sun overlapping. 

“I love you Sun,” you say softly. Sun’s arms slide further up, gripping the back of your shirt. “I’ll miss you. You should try texting me back sometime. Just to say how you’re doing.” Her grip tightens. “And I’ll try to say sooner if my thoughts start spiraling out of control again.” 

“Okay.” 

“Mm?”

Sun straightens, and you have to lean away to avoid knocking against her head. “I’ll text. If you promise to take care of yourself.” 

Ah. You feel your face go hot and it’s your turn to look away. “I’m fine, really! I just sort of spiraled with that one thought and we’re working on it now!” 

“You’re pale and you haven’t been sleeping well.” Sun’s fingers trap your chin and force you to look up. “Have you eaten any fruit or vegetables recently?” You grimace, and their thumb taps over your lips. “Have you been outside the pizzaplex at all this past week?”

“You’re a bully,” you complain, unable to escape. “I wanted to stay with you and Moon.” 

Sun’s hand slips from your chin to your apron pocket. You make a very undignified sound until she fishes out your phone, holding it up. “You will be with us. In our own head, in a way.” 

“Right.” Your lockscreen is an old picture of you and Sun, clearly taken by the animatronic. You take your phone back, holding it to your chest. “You won’t be able to escape me so long as I have this.” 

“How terrible,” Sun’s smile is in his voice. 

“The worst,” you agree. 

#fnaf daycare au #fnaf daycare attendant #daycare attendant #daycare attendant moon #daycare attendant sun #fnaf moon #fnaf sun #daycare attendant fandom #fnaf dca #sundrop #moondrop #seriously how many tags are there in the world that focus on the dca #constellations au #dca ocs #my writing #I'll be backtagging my writing soon

[mulletmitsuya]

Toman Groupchat (good timeline, which means everyone is alive)

Warning: dog funeral, car accident, suggestive (barely), swearing

Desc: Mikey doesn't have good time management skills (i am so terrible at descriptions, my bad)

Sano Gc

Emma: Michael

Emma: where are you?? :(

Shinichiro: Mikey you were suppose to be here an hour ago

Izana: why would you trust him to drive a car by himself

Izana: he's probably sleeping

Mikey: no i'll be there in like 5 minutes

Shinichrio: where are you??

Mikey: i can't see any street signs anywhere

Mikey: this is so stressful

Mikey: uh i just passed a bus stop that has a stop sign with a yellow dick painted on so

Shinichiro: that's 20 minutes away

Mikey: whoops

Emma: we're starting without you

Mikey: NO JUST WAIT

Mikey: why wouldn't you guys just let me get get here with my bike this would have solved so many problems

Shinichiro: cause Pah said we shouldn't. give Pochi some respect :/

Mikey: POCHI IS DEAD!!! AND DOESN'T KNOW NOR CARE ABOUT WHICH METHOD OF TRASPORTATION I AM USING TO GET TO HER FUNERAL. SHE ALSO WON'T KNOW THAT I'M LATE. WHY YOU ASK??? CAUSE SHE'S A DOG"

Mikey: YOU GUY'S ARE SO EXTRA

Shinichiro: dude :/

Everyone Gc

Izana: "POCHI IS DEAD!!! AND DOESN'T KNOW NOR CARE ABOUT WHICH METHOD OF TRANSPORTATION I AM USING TO GET TO HER FUNERAL. SHE ALSO WON'T KNOW THAT I'M LATE. WHY YOU ASK?? CAUSE SHE'S A DOG"

Izana: words from Mikey just btw

Baji: the fucking disrespect

Baji: i'm shaking rn

Mitsuya: dude

Mitsuya: first of all we've been waiting for you for like an hour

Mitsuya: and now this

Mitsuya: and it doesn't matter

Mitsuya: more than Pochi, it's about Pah who is our friend who is also in mouring

Mitsuya: be a little more sensitive

Mikey: but i was sleepy :(

Mitsuya: 😐

Takemitchy: Mikey-kun i offered to pick you up tho

Draken: why didn't you

Takemitchy: he said it was too early

Draken: ...😐

Hina: but it was like 11am

Takemitchy: he said he was still sleeping

Baji: you trust people for years and this is what you get

Baji: you're sick dude

Mikey: IT'S A DOG😭😭😭😭

Takeomi: pay some damn respect

Mikey: 🤨

Mikey: i know y'all didn't invite Takeomi

Mikey: i give it 30 minutes until the paparazzi he "didn't call" get to the funeral

Senju: bro acts like he's the famous one💀

Pah: Mikey i'm very disappointed in you, we're starting the service

Mikey: dude give me 5 minutes

Mikey: ...

Mikey: ...nvm

Shinichiro: what now??

Pah: bitchass

Mikey: bad news

Mikey: i've been hit by another car

Mikey: i'm fine tho

Izana: pity

Emma: ok let's just start guys this is getting ridiculous

Mikey: YOU GUY'S DON'T CARE THAT I'M LITERALLY IN A CAR ACCIDENT??

Chifuyu: can you not handle when attention isn't on you for one day????

Baji: you aren't dead are you

Baji: if you were a real mf you would have flied out the window and died

Kazutora: *flew

Baji: i don't have it

Kazutora: have what?

Baji: the flew

Kazutora: huh

Kazutora: what are you talking about

Baji: i'm not sick

Kazutora: ...

Kazutora: k☺

Takemitchy: guys can you be more sensitive

Takemitchy: Kakucho's parents literally died like that

Chifuyu: of what

Takemitchy: a car accident

Baji: real mf's🔥💯

Chifuyu: Baji-san

Kakucho: i wasn't really thinking about it until you said that Mitchy but that's fine

Takemitchy: 😟

Mikey: IS NO ONE FR GONNA COME PICK ME UP

Mitsuya: nah the service is starting

Draken: wait an hour

Mikey: where?? the wreckage??

Draken: idk the police station or smth

Emma: wait at the bus stop 😚

Mikey: i hope Ken-chin doesn't fertilize you for at least 5 more years

Draken: Sano istg

Emma: that's not funny🙁

Mikey: of course it's not funny, i'm cursing you

Pah: when you die, which will be very soon

Pah: i will make sure to take 10 heavy, fat shits before even thinking about coming on time

Pah: better yet, i won't come at all

Pah: i'll just continue taking heavy, fat shits while you're small, 5'3, decomposed body is buried, never to be seen again

Mitsuya: what the fuck Pah

Mitsuya: you could have said literally anything else

Draken: uh

Baji: that's the spirit ❗

Baji: some real shit

Kazutora: man what's wrong with you

Pah: i thought we were all on the same page

Mikey: ☹️

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers manga #tokyo revengers texts #tokrev #tokyo revengers smau #sano manjiro/mikey #mitsuya takashi #baji keisuke #ryuguji ken/draken #matsuno chifuyu #hanemiya kazutora #sano shinichiro #sano emma #tachibana hinata #hanagaki takemitchy #akashi takeomi #akashi senju #kurokawa izana #sano izana #sorry it's short i've been so busy but i haven't made one of these in a while #brain isn't braining #so tired #i hope you guys r doing good fr #this is based on a tweet i saw but it was deleted and i saw it on pinterest #this is so ass my bad

[qwerty-between-the-lines]

Percy and friends were having what you could call an Argo II reunion campout trip.

Jason's absence was definitely felt for all of them, but as Piper had pointed out - Jason wouldn't have wanted them to quit living and having fun on his account.

They all knew that Jason would be with them in spirit, so it was agreed that Leo should go ahead with the reunion idea. Of course, everyone was free to bring their significant others.

...and so, their little family sat gathered around the campfire, as Leo and Calypso passed out plates that they easily recognized.

Nico: Is it camping if we use magical dishes to conjure food?

Leo: Hey. There's nothing stopping you from conjuring a hot dog and using a stick. Me? I prefer glamping!

Hazel: It's so great to be back with you guys. We don't get together as often as we should.

Frank: Hey, that's the life of a demigod for you.

Percy: Yeah. Too busy doing our parents' dirty work to have much personal time.

Nico didn't conjure a hot dog, in spite of his weak protest. He conjured an avocado and cheese sandwich, a chocolate donut, and some jerky.

Will: You have a healthy appetite.

Nico: I'm not planning on taking any underworld trips anytime soon, so I'm good.

Annabeth used her plate to conjure up a Slim Fast.

Leo: Seriously? You use the magic plate for that?

Annabeth: I'm trying to watch the calories at present.

Percy: I keep telling her she isn't fat.

Annabeth: Shut up, Seaweed Brain!

Nico: How can you drink that crap, Annabeth? I bet it tastes like chalk and ass.

Will cleared his throat awkwardly.

Nico: Hey, that's not the same thing. You know what I meant!

Hazel: ANYWAY. It's great to be together again.

Calypso: I hope none of you will object if I prefer wine.

Frank: Uh... minors.

Calypso: I didn't say anything about you having any. Besides, I'm not drinking that diet crap like Dionysus does. I'm not on probation.

The sky thundered in the distance.

Percy: Uh... Calypso. Careful what you say about Mr. D...

Piper: Isn't that a little rich coming from you, Percy?

Percy: Hey, we're on better terms than before ever since I offered him that Diet Coke ship. Or at least... not so hostile terms.

Leo: I bet he'd still turn you into an Atlantic Bottlenose.

Percy: Well, probably, but that would just mean he thinks of me the same as the gods think of all demigods.

Hazel: Apollo excluded.

Frank: I don't know about that. Apollo had already become human a few times before that last fiasco, and that didn't stop him from threatening to kill us.

Percy: I know how to stop him. Just ask him to make a haiku about your death instead of actually killing you.

Annabeth: I wouldn't joke about that.

Will: Yeah. Dad's known for having a wicked sense of humor from time to time. He might cause you to have dreams about haikus.

Percy: Think I should ask Meg to pass on a good word for me? Just in case Apollo's planning to give me haiku dreams?

Leo: Dude! Meg said Commodus was hot. I'm not saying I don't trust her now, but her judgment's another thing.

Piper: ...and you didn't think Commodus is hot, Leo?

Leo: Honestly? Not even a little bit. Horrible personality. Looks isn't all there is for me.

Calypso: ...so if Commodus didn't have a horrible personality would you think he was hot?

Leo: Nah. He's not really my type...

#pjo hoo toa #text post #headcanon #camping #glamping #percy jackson #demigods #funny #humor #friendship #jason grace #piper mclean #frank zhang #hazel lavesque #nico di angelo #will solace #leo valdez #calypso #gods #apollo #annabeth chase #meg mccaffrey #commodus #haiku #bisexual leo valdez #implied bisexual leo #dionysus #dolphins

[warringwarrioridiot]

"They was asking for it"

YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT YOU'RE ASKING FOR?? A BIG FAT BASEBALL BAT TO THE BACK OF THE SKULL AT FULL SPEED MAX ISTG

Mfs like this need to take a long walk off of a short cliff cus if I EVER catch them I'm gonna commit some good old fashion homicide.

If you say things like "You should've enjoyed it" or "at least you got some" I'm tracking your IP and shoving ten cacti in your anal hole and/or vagina.

"game is game 🤪"

You need to shut your ketchup stain, Junkrat main, micro brain, aluminium chain, ankle sprain, CHOCOLATE RAIIIIN, with your runny nose dirty toes lick hobos cOwAbUnGa BrOs, Dude, I want you to look at your entire life. All your life choices. And tell me when you had an original idea in your brain. Your ass got kicked out and disowned and you started aggressively tapping the home button on your IPhone "Oh, help. Why is it not working?". YOUR ENTIRE EXISTENCE IS LIKE A NARUTO FILLER EPISODE, MY BOY! YOUR PRANKS ARE AS REPETITIVE AS THE AD "Whopper, Whopper, Whopper, Whopper" YOUR BRAIN IS JUST AS REAL AS THE LOVE YOUR PARENTS HAVE FOR YOU! YOUR GRANDMA GAVE BLING BLING BOY A LAP DANCE FOR PAY DAY. Wait hold on! *Punch punch punch* GIVE ME THE MONEY YOUR GRANDMA! I JUST ROBBED YOUR GRANDMA! I JUST HIT A LICK ON YOUR GRANDMA, HOW DOES THAT FEEL?! SHE POOR AS HELL NOW! YOU PUT A BALLOON ON YOUR HEAD AND THOUGHT IT WAS A DURAG! YOU LIKE RONALD MCDONALD FROM OHIO! "HEYA KID! YOU WANT A BIG MAC?!" WHEN YOU WALK DOWNSTAIRS YOUR WHOLE HOUSE STARTS RUMBLING! YOU BRING THE POWER OF EREN YEAGER AND 37 COLOSSAL TITANS DOWN YOUR STAIRCASE! AFTER YOU EAT DINNER YOU EAT THE PLATE AND THEN YOU EAT THE TABLE AS WELL! CHOMP CHOMP! YOU RENT OUT THE GAP BETWEEN YOU TEETH AS A PARKING SPACE FOR ANTS! YOU LOOK EMO ASF "CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES! THIS IS MY LAST RESORT! SUFFOCATION! NO BREATHING!" LOOK AT YOUR NOSE YOU HAVE TWO MARIO PIPES COMING OUT OF YOUR HEAD! YAHOO! LET'S A GO! THEY MADE A SEQUEL TO FINDING NEMO BASED OFF YOUR ASS CALLED "LOCATING CHROMOSOMES! IN THEATRES THIS JULY!" YOUR BEST FRIEND IS A RAT LIVING UNDER YOUR BED IN A PRINGLES CAN! YOU POSTED AN INSTAGRAM STORY ABOUT A JAMAICAN CRICKET GIVING YOU A LAP DANCE IN THE BACK OF TOYS R US! YOU TORTURED AN ANT BY TYING HIM TO YOUR BUTTHOLE AND FARTING ON HIM! I HAVE MORE ROASTS YOU KNOW! YOUR GRANDMA IS A DARK SOULS BOSS CALLED "THE WRINKLE!

EW NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO THERE IS NO WAY! THAT THIS... OLD ASS FART WRINKLE IS TALKING TO ME IN SUCH A DISRESPECTFUL MANNER. YOU KNOW IT'S ACTUALLY KINDA SAD YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH TO BE A GRANDPA NOW BUT INSTEAD OF ADVANCING YOUR BIOLOGICAL CHAIN YOU'VE INSTEAD SPENT YOUR DAYS ALONE IN YOUR ROOM READING HITLER MANIFESTOS AND COSPLAYING AS A FUCKIN' NEO NAZI. SO MANY YEARS AND SUCH LITTLE ADVANCEMENT. No seriously! Seriously I find it amusing THAT YOUR PENCIL PENIS DONKEY KONG BARREL BUILT LOOKIN' ASS WOULD ASSUME THAT I EVEN REMOTELY CARE ABOUT A SINGLE ONE. NO NO NO FUCK THAT. A SINGLE SYLLABLE OF THE VERBAL DIARRHEA GARGLE THAT'S COMING OUT OF THE DUSTY SARLAC PIT YOU CONSIDER TO BE YOUR FUCKING MOUTH! YOU WANT ME TO SHOW YOU MY FACE?? YOU WANNA SEE MY FUCKIN' FACE??? BITCH SHOW ME YOUR FUCKIN' HAIRLINE CAUSE I KNOW THERE'S NO WAY YOU'RE SPEAKING TO ME RIGHT NOW DRESSED UP AS A GOD DAMN DIABOLICAL BOY SCOUT. NAH LOOK AT THEM TEETH. BOY YOUR TEETH IN CREATIVE MODE. HELL NAH BOY STOP PLAYING YOU TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT. BRO THEY GOT FOSSIL RECORDS FOR EACH ONE OF YOUR FAT ROLLS. NAH STOP PLAYING WITH ME BOY I CAN'T TAKE YO ASS SERIOUSLY WHEN YOU DRESS UP LIKE A GODDAMN MEDIEVAL TERRORIST. BRO IS ABOUT TO SHOOT UP HIS OLD FOLKS HOME WITH A CROSSBOW AND A FUCKING TREBUCHET. YA YEET DOM DOM DOM DOM DOM DOM! SHUT YO UGLY ASS UP. WHAT THE FUCK? A HE AHHH EEEEE SHUT UP BITCH. YOU WANT ME TO TURN ON MY CAMERA? YO DICK BUILT LIKE A INVERTED BANANA. YO FOREHEAD CRACKED UP LIKE THE AFRICAN SAVANNAH. I CAUGHT YOU AND YO SISTER BUTT NAKED LAST NIGHT. SWEET HOME ALABAMA. FUCK YOU THINK THIS IS? WHAT IS YOU WEARING WITH YO GODDAMN HONEY WHERE IS MY SUPER SUIT? NAH BOY LOOK AT YO ROOM, YO HOUSE DIRTY AS HELL. YOU GOT FOUR SEWER RATS IN YO BATH TUB RIGHT NOW FLOATING ON TOP OF A PIZZA BOX SINGING. "YO HO THIEVES AND BEGGARS". LIKE SHIT, BOY I CAUGHT YOU HAVING AN EMOTIONAL CONVERSATION WITH YO TOE NAIL LAST NIGHT. WE COULD'VE BEEN SUPER STARS REMEMBER WHEN WE AS JACKING CARS. YOU AND YO TOE NAIL WAS GOING TO BE THE DYNAMIC DUO. BITCH YOU WAS GONNA BE IN AMERICA'S GOT TALENT SWINGING THAT SHIT AROUND LIKE A FUCKING BOOMERANG. SHUT YO STUPID ASS UP. BRUH I CAUGHT YOU JACK SPARROW RUNNING AROUND YOUR HOUSE WHILE YOUR DAD WAS TRYING TO BEAT YOU WITH A TOILET PLUNGER LAST NIGHT. COME HERE BOY! SHUT YO ASS UP. BITCH EVERYTIME YOU TAKE A SHIT THE GAME OF THRONES THEME SONG STARTS PLAMMERING IN YO HOUSE.BUM BUA BUM BUDUM BUM. SHUT YO UGLY ASS UP BRUH.

Are you getting mad?

Are you getting mad?

DAMN You getting mad now! Cuz yo Legal name is Ledenhouser Strogenberg. Nah don't be Smiling now boy You ain't slick Boy! I caught you in the locker room after gym class Frantically wiping yo armpits down With a kleenex While tryna smell good For the girls In the hallway. OI ZOINKS! I GOTTA- I GOTTA HURRY UP. SHUT YO ASS UP YOU LIKE A DIABETIC TOASTER STRUDEL. YOU UGLY AHH AS HELL. YOU GOT THEM BIG ASS HUMPTY DUMPTY PANTS ON BRUH. YOU USE A FRUIT ROLL UP AS A BELT TO HOLD UP YO BUNG DU BUNGLA. Shut yo ugly Ass up You got Mineral deposits In your Belly button. You dumb As hell You thought Google drive Was a brand new Taxi service. Bitch yo Grandma Threw a Rage spell On the kitchen floor And started Smacking you with A weiner schnitzel. Shut yo ass up You a Diabolical Special needs Student. Boy you was In the back of a Short bus Maniacally Planning How you was gonna Take over Your school.HMMMMM YEAHHHHHHHHHH It will be MINE! Shut yo Ass up, Boy I caught you Butt Naked Playing gorilla tag With a mouse in your Kitchen. Yo ass Be sliding around The counters Like a paraplegic Frozone. Gotta Catch 'em ALL! Shut yo ass up With yo "I got a feeling Ooooooooo!" Everytime yo Grandpa Tickles yo Butthole. Shut yo Stupid ass up You thought the One chip challenge Was sticking a Hot cheeto Up your buttcrack. Ok! Here we go Everybody! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Shut yo Dirty ass up Get yo ass on bruh.

It's actually so fucking sad these people still exist in 2024.

Istg misogynists and forced birth extremists and rapists are the most atrociously ugliest love-lacking idiots.

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I rest my fucking case, your honor. Kill every single one of these people before I do it myself.

#feminism #warringwarrioridiot #misogynistic people are dumb asf #kill all rapists #end rape #thank you #i rest my case