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#is as fulfilling as theirs was when I go

hanafubukki · 3 months

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Happy Birthday Malleus Draconia 💚💕

Summary: You kidnap Malleus Draconia.

Sebek knew it would be a tiring day when he saw a letter placed on his wardrobe table.

It had decorative little crocodiles and squirrels all over with his name written in your writing.

He could already feel a headache incoming.

He’ll wonder how you snuck into his room to place said letter later, he was more interested in the message you had to say.

“Dear Knight,

Your Lord has been kidnapped. He is mine for the day.

Mwah~

YN”

Sebek rushed out of his room, running to the Diasomnia waiting room where his lord would sit and enjoy tea at this time.

…only to be met with a giggling Lilia and a napping Silver.

“YN!”

“Did you have to tease Sebek?”

“It’s all in good fun Tsunotaro.”

“I see.”

While Malleus ponders your answer, you plopped down right next to him on the couch.

“What does this…kidnapping entail?”

You could tell Malleus was humoring you. He found this whole situation funny and yet intriguing.

“For you? Just sit there look pretty and enjoy all the snacks, games, and movies I have.”

Malleus laughed lowly, “YN, I do have duties to fulfill. I can’t just sit here.”

You shrugged, “One day without work won’t bring down your dorm. Besides, all work and no play make dragons go cranky.”

Malleus laughed freely and you joined him this time, “Is that so? Then I shall join in this activity with you.”

You laid the nearby comforter over you and Malleus before starting your T.V.

It would be a good day; you would make sure of it.

“This warrior does not speak?”

“Kind of. He talks he’s just not voice acted, but he does make sounds when you attack with him.”

“Interesting. A silent and courageous warrior who will save his kingdom and the princess.”

“Reminds you of someone?”

“This Link reminds me of Silver. They share many similar qualities.”

You joked, “Are you the princess then?”

“I am a prince, am I not?” Malleus replied, before softly continuing, “and Silver has saved me, from myself.”

You bumped your shoulder with his, “That’s love for you.”

“Yes, it is.”

“That crocodile and that pirate…”

“Funny, isn’t it?”

“Yes, especially as Kingscholar dressed as one during Halloween.”

“Does the crocodile remind you of Sebek?”

The glint in Malleus' eyes answered your question.

You can only imagine Sebek's reaction if he knew, “Well with the way Sebek is always barking at Leona, I can't blame you for thinking it.”

Ah, you were going to hold this over Sebek's head forever.

“Those fairies should have never been given the child.”

“Yeah…”

“They haven’t properly fed her, even Lilia knew to feed a baby!”

“Yeah.”

“She almost fell off the cliff!”

“I know. They suck.”

You tugged at Malleus’ hair, “At least she had someone to take care of her, two of them in fact.”

Malleus calmed down knowing exactly to whom you referred, “Yes, those days were filled with laughter and warmth even amidst the chaos. How…nostalgic.”

Malleus leaned towards you; a mischievous glint in his eyes, it reminded you of a certain pink-streaked fae, “Want to hear an embarrassing story grandmother told me about Lilia?”

“Yes! I’m all ears!”

You watched as Tsunotaro enjoyed Toothless and Hiccup's adventures.

You knew he would like this series.

You wondered how Sam had the trilogy.

…you would question him thoroughly later.

You were content to watch Tsunotaro be happy.

His family is never far from his thoughts as he is never far from theirs.

You felt happy to be part of his family.

“YN, is there a reason to why we are making cupcakes this late at night?”

He didn’t know.

You hid your smile as you put the tray of goodies into the oven.

Malleus must have enjoyed his day if he forgot why tonight would be special.

“Anytime is a good time for cupcakes, just like how you can have ice cream even during winter.”

“I thought it was easier for human’s teeth to decay due to late night sugary treats?”

“We’ll be fine! Just make sure to brush your teeth and don’t tell Trey -senpai.”

You went over to the nearby drawer. The confetti poppers were there as planned, just a few more minutes before the time came, so you snuck them into your pocket discreetly.

“Let’s go play more Zelda.”

You and Malleus moved towards the lounge; you eyed the hallway clock on the way.

Less than a minute.

You took out the poppers from your pocket.

“Malleus?”

“Yes?”

You pulled the poppers out just as he entered the ramshackle lounge.

3…2…1

“Happy Birthday (Lord) Malleus!”

Malleus was shocked as confetti rained on him from all sides.

Lilia, Silver, Sebek, and you surrounded him as the day turned over.

His surprised face broke into a wide smile before an unrestrained joyous laughter filled the lounge.

What a beautiful start to today.

The day Malleus Draconia was born.

A day filled with endless love.

Happy Birthday Malleus.

Resounded affectionately in all the hearts of everyone present.

May you always be filled with happiness and love.

Bonus:

Silver came to you as you watch Lilia bear hug Malleus. It was funny how someone so petite wrapped all four limbs on someone so tall.

Silver hesitated.

You knew.

“He baked a cake, didn’t he?”

Silver sighed, “Yes. We tried to stop him.”

You laughed and shook your head.

“It’s okay. Toxic waste it might be, but it is something Lilia made with him in mind. Malleus will love it nonetheless.”

You bumped shoulders with Silver, whispering, “We made cupcakes.”

Silver’s grateful smile had you hugging him.

No one will get food poisoning today, not on your watch.

You hoped.

☺️🌺🌸💚

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plutoasteroids · 2 days

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PAC How Will Your Future Spouse View You

Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3

DISCLAIMER THIS IS A GENERAL READING TAKE WHAT RESONATES AND LEAVE WHAT DOESN'T.

Strictly for entertainment purposes.

PILE 1

So, before I get into the tarot bit of the reading the overall vibe I am getting is that you and your future spouse will be that couple that are still doing cute stuff together even in old age. You know those older couples you see on TikTok on dates still happy and very much in love, yeah like that. One word I can use to describe it is cozy, just very warm and affectionate basically feeling like this person is your home. It's going to be like 'I'd rather come home to you then be anywhere else'.

On to the tarot bit, Your FS sees you as someone very confident and optimistic (even if you don't see yourself that way). They see you as being positive and very wholesome. Again, before I pulled cards I channelled and I still got the warmth.

Oh my gosh, if any of you have read The Song of Achilles that's basically it. Before anyone points out to me they were a same sex couple .Yes, I know but I am talking about the relationship dynamic between Patroclus and Achilles.

You may have gone through a difficult time in your life and your future spouse will admire how strong and resilient you are, how you're able to adapt to challenges and changes in environment. You may be the type of person who is connected to both their divine feminine and masculine and they truly find that attractive.

They certainly view you as their other half and I know its cliche to say soulmate but that's all your future spouse is saying. You just give them so much happiness and emotional fulfilment.

'They are my home, my soulmate, my forever'

PILE 2

Ugh Pile 2 your spouse will literally worship you😩. Like you'll tell them your insecurities and they'll just sit there kissing every scar, mark, dimple anything you're insecure about they'll adore. If you're a female or a feminine reading this and you have thick thighs I heard them say 'Come here and crush my skull with those sexy thighs'. Whoever you are you have someone's poor child down horrendous for you.

I think they may be the type to just watch your social media whether you are getting to know each other, dating, engaged or married your social media pages, pictures and videos will always be on their phone screen and they won't go to sleep without listening to a little voice message you sent. Once they get attached baby there's absolutely no getting rid of them, I heard 'You'll have an easier time getting rid of bed bugs'.

When you meet them, they may be a party animal or a player.

Disclaimer it's not toxic obsession more like they will let you be your own person but at the end of the day they are yours and you are theirs, you are their spouse, and they are your spouse and they will forever put you on a pedestal not to the open where they will neglect themselves.

They see you as a prize (again not in a creepy way) You may have options when you meet this person but best believe they'll make sure to stand out and win you over. They see you as the best the world has to offer in terms of what a wife/husband/spouse should be. Your person may have had a few letdowns when it came to love and just know that they see you as a dream come true and again, I know that's very cliche but trust me when Isay they view having you as a spouse as their biggest accomplishment and they want you to know that they'll prove to you every day they are worthy to call themselves your spouse. They feel like you have gone through a period of depression and sadness, and they want you to know that they acknowledge it and they see you as strong every day.

The couple I channelled for you guys is Queen Charlotte and King George from Bridgerton.

PILE 3

First thing I heard 'Sugar Daddy'. This person will spoil you but love you even more. Yes, they may have money and give you gifts but this person truly does love you, care about you and respect you.

They may be older than you that's why people may think that they are your glucose guardian which is not technically wrong and not technically correct either. I feel like that will be a long term joke you two have about them being your sucrose supplier..

They will definitely view you as delicate, I want to say that they are the protective type but not protective to the point of you feeling suffocated by them. They want you to be comfortable and have what you like 'If my spouse wants that watch I'll get it for them'.

They will view you as fun loving, yet you have this air of power to you that they love. Sure, they view you as delicate and they want to protect you, but they also view you as strong and beyond capable of taking care of yourself and those around you basically your spouse is saying 'they want me, but they don't need me'. They know that you can walk away from them anytime and they like that you're always in your power no matter what.

Your spouse admires how you don't need them to feel whole or for financial gain they see you as a breath of fresh air, a change of pace, an adventure.

He may touch you a lot with your consent obviously, like a hand on your waist, shoulder or they may steal little quick kisses. Also, there may be a lot of friendly banter in the relationship.

The couple I channel for you guys is Fallon and Liam from Dynasty.

#free tarot reading #pick a pile #pick a card #future spouse #tarot reading #tarotcommunity #tarotblr #tarot cards #daily tarot #love tarot reading #love tarot free #pagan #paganblr #hellenic pagan #Spotify

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remcycl333 · 7 months

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your desire is a gift of god 🍁

I was reading “at your command” by neville goddard the other morning, and there was something he was talking about that I really loved. he reminds us that everything you desire, you desire because it’s meant to be yours. you wouldn’t desire something that u couldn’t or shouldn’t have, and when u desire something, it is the gift of god.

here is a part from "at your command" i really loved:

"don't be anxious or concerned as to results. they will follow just as surely as day follows night. look upon your desires--all of them--as the spoken words of God, and every word or desire a promise. the reason most of us fail to realize our desires is because we are constantly conditioning them. do not condition your desire. just accept as it comes to you. give thanks for it to the point that you are grateful for having already received it--then go about your way in peace." -Neville Goddard

whenever you think throughout the day “ugh i want *my desire*” (or something of the sort), don’t get upset or anxious bc you’re in the state of lack or “u messed everything up” etc. the past few days since ive read this, any time I catch myself thinking from lack, I just go “omg thank uuuuu it’s mine yayyy”

like…you desire something bc it’s supposed to be YOURS. your godself is SHOWING YOU what can give you the feeling you desire. like when you desire the feeling of love, your godself will make you desire that specific person bc that’s what will give you the feeling you crave. Or maybe you desire the feeling of security, so your godself gives you the desire of money or being rich. etc!

so when u desire something, that is a GIFT! your godself is showing u the thing that u deserve—the thing that is RIGHTFULLY YOURS!!!! u do not desire something by accident. u desire it bc it’s supposed to be yours!!!

in our society we’ve been taught that we “can’t always get what we want” and “things won’t always go our way” etc but like….no!!!! God is not supposed to WANT for anything like wtf??? if god wants something it’s bc it’s rightfully theirs

when u create literally everything in your reality, there is absolutely nothing in your reality that u don’t deserve. oh so money only exists bc we’re conscious of it existing yet we don’t deserve it??? that big mansion only exists bc we assume it does yet we don’t deserve it??? NO!!!!! (not saying we deserve the bad things in our reality. we just deserve the things we DESIRE)

we’ve been conditioned by the people who haven’t been awoken to the law that life isn’t fair and we don’t deserve anything in this world, but that’s simply not true. we deserve everything we want, bc the only reason we want it—once again—is bc it’s supposed to be ours.

the reason i love this idea of saying “thank u” any time u think of wanting something is bc 1) it shifts u to wish fulfillment (saying thank u= u accept it as yours) and 2) youre accepting the gift of god!

like, wanting something isn’t bad. it’s THE GIFT OF GOD! you desire a certain feeling, and you give yourself the solution immediately. u feel lonely and want to feel—for lack of a better word—unlonely? here u go, u want a friend! on top of that, you want a GOOD friend, so here u go! u naturally desire what you’d consider a perfect friend maybe they’re loyal, the same age as you, live in your town, etc. you naturally desire all of these things without even trying!

I love this sm bc it’s kinda like, manifestation is already halfway done IMMEDIATELY! manifestation is started and completed in the 4d. u want a feeling….u give yourself the feeling. all done! yes ofc, as a side effect, it reflects in your 3D as well. but manifestation is completed before your desire even reflects in your outer-world.

the second u give yourself the feeling (give yourself your desire in the 4d) u successfully manifested it.

so if the steps are 1) desire a feeling and then 2) give yourself the feeling…by desiring something, your godself is showing u how to give yourself the feeling. for example, you want the feeling of being loved. so u naturally begin to desire being with a certain person. this is a gift! and you’re god, so it’s a gift you are giving yourself!

so you’re like, damn i want to feel loved…but how do I feel loved in my 4d??? BY GIVING YOURSELF YOUR DESIRE (your specific person) IN YOUR 4D!!!!! (for example)

u want a feeling, so your godself gives u a desire to show you how to feel it, and then u give it to urself in the 4d and feel the feeling, and then u manifest it INSTANTLY. slay! it’s that easy!!!! wanting things ISNT BAD!!!! it’s a TOOL!!!! a GIFT!!!!!

also like, if u notice u fell into a stack of lack and are thinking abt how badly u want your desire, DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP!!! u know why you’re thinking of how u want your desire?? bc ur godself is reminding u of how to give yourself the feeling baby say thanks!! & keep going

I think this is such a simple and comforting and exciting way to look at the law. like, wanting things isn’t bad and you only want something bc you’re SUPPOSED TO GET IT!! I hope this resonates with y’all!!! 🤍

(i wrote this two months ago at 3am and you can kinda tell lol but i love this post so! here it is in all it's glory :) adapted from my twitter thread)

#law of assumption

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venusgirltarot · 6 months

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Dirty Talk & Your Future Spouse (18+) ࿐ ˚ . ✦

Disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only. Tarot readings are about possibilities based on your current energy. Energy is forever changing and nothing is set in stone. Always remember, you have your own free will to make whatever decision you feel is best.

book a reading with me here

☆ ミ ☆彡

Pile One ࿐

The way your FS likes to dirty talk really depends on the way you’re behaving. Your FS seems to be someone who’s into BDSM and a sub/dom dynamic. They have one side where they’re very gentle and sort of “talk you through it” telling you how pretty you are and how deserving you are. They’ll tell you how good you’ve been and how good you look. They may like wax play and finishing on you. They’ll tell you how good you look with them all over you. They’ll also be very into spanking and leaving marks on you and part of their dirty talk is telling you how you are theirs and they pen you.

When your behavior isn’t as good to them and they feel you deserve “punishment”, the dirty talk will be very different. They’ll tell you that you deserve all the punishment you’re getting and tell you that you’re going to “get fucked the way you deserve” is what I heard 👀. If they’re a man or have male parts, they’ll want to “fuck your face” and they may tease you with it, as well. Leaving you needing but never giving you what you want. They may tie you up and make you watch them touch themselves and dirty talk to you about how bad they know you want it and etc. Their dirty talk when you’ve been “bad” starts out more aggressive and then they’ll start to tease you more until they give in and let you have what you want. They really like brat taming and “treating you the way you deserve” if that makes sense.

Pile Two ࿐

Your FS may enjoy pink things. Fuzzy cuffs, lingerie, hair accessories, etc. and they also like silk. The way they dirty talk is very descriptive. They may like to blindfold you and then describe to you what they’re doing to you. Sexting/phone sex may also turn them on and they’ll love to get dirty pictures from you throughout the day. They also may like dirty talking by tell you what they want to do to you long before they do it to you. They like the anticipation and they also love just describing what they want to do.

Ice play and tying you up is something that really turns them on and they really love when you whimper/get whiny. A lot of their dirty talk during sex will be things like “you like that?” Or “you like taking it like that?” Or “does that feel good” they could also be the type to say things like “tell me about it” in like a teasing sort of tone while you’re moaning (I hope that makes sense 😭) and also things like “you feel so good wrapped around me/you feel so good inside of me” and etc.

I also want to add that they’ll have a very nice voice like one of those 18+ audio creators on Reddit if any of you listen to those.

Pile 3 ࿐

This is a very kinky pile 😭 you may be someone that’s afraid to open up about some of your kinks or have had partners who didn’t get your kinks/interests but your FS will match your energy 100%. Sex with your FS will be intense but very fulfilling. They like soul bonding sex. They could have Scorpio placements. Idk if they dirty talk as much as they’re just VERY vocal like moaning, grunting, whispering, etc. they’ll tell you things like “take it” or “suck it like that” or “you look so pretty on top of me” or “you look so good bent over like that” etc. (take those as they apply, of course) they love praising/worshiping you and they’ll love giving you oral.

They may like to handcuff you and then do it doggy style, using the cuffs as a handle almost and if you’re interested in men, they’re definitely HUGE. You may love giving oral or giving this person oral specifically. Sex with this person is everything you’ve ever wanted and you really match each other energy. They’ll constantly praise your body and tell you how good you look during sex and that’s most of their dirty talk, just telling you how obsessed with you they are and how good you look or how bad they want you and etc. and they’ll be open to trying out all your kinks.

They’ll be super into telling you exactly how good you feel and what exactly it does to them. A lot of their dirty talk may kind of sound like smut but in a good way. They may have read a lot of smut at some point or something. Your FS has a very booktok vibe like the sex you gave us a lot like what you read about in spicy romance books.

#tarotblr #free tarot readings #free readings #tarot cards #tarot reader #tarot related #pac reading #tarot requests #collective reading #spirituality #18+ pac #18+ tarot reading #18+ tarot

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fcwoso · 6 months

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Morning motivation · Alexia Putellas

Summary: alexia needed motivation to conquer the day, reader makes a poor attempt and somehow succeeds (fluffy)

MASTERLIST

Alexia was a major perfectionist. Everything had to go well from the beginning of the match until the final whistle. It was impossible, though. Football was an unpredictable sport, but not for the Spanish midfielder. No, she had it under control, that's what she had convinced herself throughout the years as a professional. She felt this intense fear of failure, afraid of breaking the promise she made to herself years ago. She promised to be the best at what’s she’s doing in order to make her family, fans and loved ones proud. Somehow, it turned into an unhealthy mindset, pushing herself to the maximum each time she felt like she didn't do enough.

This mindset got worse when she came back from her ACL injury. Insecurity kicked in once she started to play along her teammates who she currently almost considered as competition. The two Ballon d’Or awards didn’t do enough convincing, even though she saw them every morning right after she woke up. She needed more. She needed reassurance and she found it in you.

‘’Ale, you really need to get up. Training is about to start.’’ You two were currently laying in your bed, Alexia’s alarm had woken up the both of you. She had a match at noon, but Jonatan decided to plan in an early training, just to make sure everyone’s ready and in good form. You heard a small groan leave your lover’s mouth and immediately knew she was having one of those days. A strong arm was resting on your waist, pulling you closer. She wished she could just forget her obligations and continue the nice sleep she was having, but she couldn't. The whole team was counting on her, the captain had to put her own wishes aside in order to fulfill theirs.

You squeezed Alexia’s tense shoulder before stroking her warm cheek, pushing away the streaks of hair that were covering her tired face. You saw an adorable pout forming on the blonde and couldn’t help but chuckle at her childlike antics. ‘’Are you seriously laughing at me?’’ She mumbled and finally opened her eyes, face partly disappearing in her pillow. You shook your head before leaning in to press a few gentle kisses on her forehead, making the small frown disappear and decided to keep this closeness.

‘’Of course not, I could never do that.’’ Was the reply that left your mouth, it was an honest one. You could never laugh at Alexia’s misery, as she would call it because that’s how she experienced this chaos. A training bag was laying in the corner of the room, untouched by the woman who’s legs were still entangled with yours under the cozy, warm covers.

You quickly pressed a kiss to her nose to prevent her eyes from closing because you knew how fast she could fall asleep again. ‘’Can we switch for today, bebita (baby)?’’ Alexia began. ‘’I get to sleep in, and you can wear my jersey. You know how much I love it when you do.’’ The distance between you got smaller, non-existent, as she rested her head on your chest and listened to the sound of your heartbeat. You played with her hair and stayed silent, thinking of some encouraging words.

‘’You’re Alexia Putellas.’’ Was the first thing that left your mouth. You heard a small laugh, feeling Alexia’s grip on you loosening a bit as she rested her chin on your chest. Her hazel eyes staring into your serious ones, not completely understanding the context behind the words you just spit out. ‘’That’s me.’’ She nodded. ‘’And?’’ Was the next thing she asked, trying to hide her smile. She got curious, the stern expression on your face not giving away a hint of what you were thinking of.

You shifted your hands from her shoulders to her cheeks and held them firmly while leaving patterns with your thumbs. ‘’That’s it. That’s literally it.’’ You whispered, but suddenly heard a loud laugh leaving the blonde’s mouth. ‘’Wait, this is your poor attempt to motivate me?’’ Alexia couldn’t help but be amused by your words, she knew you were being serious by the look of your face. You nodded and stared lovingly at her, happy you got to see her smile this morning. ‘’You have nothing to worry about.’’ You replied, placing a tender kiss on her lips, hoping to emphasize the message you were trying to convey.

Alexia nodded and thanked you quietly, a small sigh escaping her mouth as she rolled out of bed. She pulled the covers over your form and made her way to the bathroom. ‘’You know, you can still wear my jersey.’’ She winked before completely disappearing from your view, pointing to the part of the closet that was dedicated to her jerseys. That’s what you were planning on doing, but leading the team? No, that was La Reina’s job.

#alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas one shot #alexia putellas imagine #woso community #woso x reader #woso #woso one shot #woso imagine #fc barcelona femeni #woso fanfics

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che444 · 7 months

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In order to change them, you must change YOU.

(Long post)

I have manifested many people back into my life: SPs , old friends, family member, people I wanted to be friends with but didn’t have the courage to ask to be friends. Literally anyone. But before I could invite them into my life, I had to go within.

When you’re manifesting someone, you must not only drop your old story but theirs as well. This was hard for me to understand at first because I had very strong negative emotions towards some people for what they did, and I chained them to those cinder blocks of mistakes and viewed them in that light forever.

I am one to hold a grudge, and sometimes they do some bs that makes them deserve it! You’re valid!

However, if you want a person back in your life under better circumstance you must remember several important things:

everything happens through you:

I am not blaming you for their behavior but what you must realize is that they have no choice but to continue to be the way that you ultimately view them. If you think your SP doesn’t want you, they will continue to not want you, because you are consumed in that thought and they only reflect you, you are god and they are your creation.

Process how they made you feel:

You’re never just going to let something go, sometimes people will hurt you, but in order to change the story surrounding them and how you view them you must process your feelings towards them. Write it down, talk to a close friend, whatever works for you.

You may come out of this not wanting them in your life and that is perfectly okay, you may decide you no longer want them and you want someone better and that’s okay! Manifest it baby!

Allow them to evolve and/or Allow yourself to have the version of them you want

If you want to access this new and improved version of them you must allow it to come in or it simply will not.

What I like to do is take myself out of the position of being the person who experienced them, and look at the raw emotions of it all, as God. I am not a religious person, however looking back on when I grew up Christian it definitely offered some interesting points that I believe helped in my journey.

If you are god and all your creation is made in your image, take a second to consider it you have ever done anything that may have caused hurt. Have you ever done anything that hurt someone? Have you ever related to feelings of jealousy or got really angry at someone? Most likely. Have you been forgiven and in turn changed to be better? There are many people who may still view you as the villain in their story but you have forgiven yourself and became anew, they could never put that on you now because of who you have evolved to become, right? Well, give this person a chance to evolve. You are the one writing the story, are you going to continue to make them the big bad wolf or are you going to let them be the knight in shining armor.

Now if this is about you not believing you deserve it, you need to start there. Why do you believe you are not worthy of your creation? Why do you believe you cannot have them or that they don’t want to be in your life? It may be that you don’t believe in love, or that you don’t believe you are worthy. Work on self concept and understand that you are everything and therefore everything is yours. From the trees to the moon, you are everything.

You can get a completely different version of them, you can completely revise an argument away, you could literally make them disappear. You can do anything! It’s your world.

Most importantly: LEAVE THE 3D ALONE

Sweetheart, if you are still maintaining the state that they hate you after saying affirmations for a day then immediately trying to text them, STOP. Start within, and the 3D has no choice but to follow. If you want to make up with them, go within, set the scene of making up with them in your head, say your affirmations, or whatever will give you the feeling that you seek. Once you reach that fulfillment within yourself, they have no choice but to reflect. Let them be who you want them to be, stop holding the old story over both of you, release it, and write a new story. Have faith in your story and have faith in you, and you will receive exactly what you want. Don’t worry about time, worry about you, time isn’t god, you are love.

P.S - don’t let anyone tell you that you shouldn’t manifest a better version of your ex or a person. You are god, why would you let anyone tell YOU what to do? Be fr.

Luv, che 🌺

#law of assumption #manifesting #neville goddard #self concept #manifestation #desired reality #manifest #shifting motivation #shifting realities #loa

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intuitionallyspiritual · 7 months

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ρꪖᥴ (ρ𝓲ᥴ𝘬 ꪖ ᥴꪖ𝘳ᦔ) 𝘳ꫀꪖᦔ𝓲ꪀᧁ

ꪗꪮꪊ𝘳 ꪶ𝓲ᠻꫀ ꪖ𝘴 ꪖ ᥴꫀꪶꫀ᥇𝘳𝓲𝓽ꪗ

Description: choose the pile that you feel most drawn to. It helps if you close your eyes and let your eyes guide you.

Warning ⚠️ ‼️: This is a general reading meaning it may not fully resonate with you as their are many energies engaging in a pile

Let me know your opinions in the comments

(Shoutout to them for making me think about doing this: @bitdemonic @evangelinesbible @allmyloveandyours

ᥴꫝꪮꪮ𝘴ꫀ ꪖ ρ𝓲ꪶꫀ:

ρ𝓲ꪶꫀ 1 (𝘴ɀꪖ, ᦔꪮ𝓳ꪖ ᥴꪖ𝓽)

ꫝꪮ᭙ ρꫀꪮρꪶꫀ ᭙𝓲ꪶꪶ ꪜ𝓲ꫀ᭙ ꪗꪮꪊ

People will view you as a very hard worker. You may also just show up on random things that isn’t in you element for example if you are a singer you’ll be seen in a movie or if your an actor/actress you’ll start a music career. By in your element I don’t mean your bad at what isn’t your element I just mean that you’ll be seen in places that wasn’t what you were known for. You like to try new things out, because of that people think you have a tendency to take on more than what you can handle and over exert yourself, however once you start something you finish it but it can lead to long breaks. They feel as though you are very creative in your way of thinking and honestly this is giving trend setter. You create your own path in what you want to deliver to the world. You don’t just stick to one genre, it goes all over the place, you have quite the duality and you fulfill each and every one. You are known for being quite the happy person, you don’t like to show what you would consider to be a weakness so people would see you as a very happy and excited about life however you also have that elegance to you where it doesn’t come off as ditzy. You give off a sexy vibe effortlessly.

ꪗꪮꪊ𝘳 ᠻꪖꪀ𝘴

Okay let me tell you, your fans are VERY passionate about you and will go to war for you at any given moment because a lot of them are going to be younger. Your most influential fans are teens to young adults. They do get confused on the genre changes and all the other projects that you do however they are standing 10 rows down for you. Your fans are hilarious and are the type to make memes out of you so be prepared. Your fans have big pride in you and they probably have your face as their profile picture. They are DEVOTED on another level. Your fans are also very confident in themselves so it makes me think that you act as a bada$$ in shows or make bada$$ music. Don’t be surprised to see edits of yourself.

ꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ ꪮ𝘳 ᠻꫀꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ?

Male Gaze is very prominent here and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. You just exert the physical appearance that men/masculine people love. Your male fans are very funny and witty.

ᦔꪖ𝓽𝓲ꪀᧁ ꪶ𝓲ᠻꫀ

Let’s just say you are going to be VERY popular in terms of the dating life. I see that people overseas even find you very attractive. You’ll get lots of dating offers from rich people, athletes, other musicians etc you have lots of options to choose from. You’ll be very happy and content within your dating life and if your significant other messes up you can just go straight to the next. I’m seeing that you’ll probably be quite famous for going on to the next because it won’t be private considering your popularity. You’ll attract all genders. Just know that rich people will always try to look for an opportunity to make you theirs.

᭙ꫝꪖ𝓽 ꪗꪮꪊ ᭙ꪮꪊꪶᦔ ᥇ꫀ ᥴꪖꪀᥴꫀꪶꪶꫀᦔ ᠻꪮ𝘳

Remember when I said you guys would like to explore different things? Yeah… you may unknowingly do a project that has some horrible undertones to it that you may have not even knew about. Like working with/being friends with someone problematic or acting in something that would be considered problematic and things to that nature but I don’t feel like it would completely end your career.

ρ𝓲ꪶꫀ 2 (ᧁ𝓲𝘳ꪶ 𝘳ꪖ𝓲𝘴𝓲ꪀᧁ ᠻ𝓲ꪀᧁꫀ𝘳)

ꫝꪮ᭙ ρꫀꪮρꪶꫀ ᭙𝓲ꪶꪶ ꪜ𝓲ꫀ᭙ ꪗꪮꪊ

I don’t know why this is giving me politician vibes but I feel they would view you as someone who speaks on their views like everyone and their mom will know how you feel about certain views you’ll be very vocal about it. (If you are a woman you may be the oldest girl in your family idk just kind of got that feeling to it) they feel as though you have a concept and you like to stick to it, it’s not that you don’t have duality you just prefer to stick to what you KNOW will be a success. You also give out a lot of content so your fans will be spoiled with pictures and videos of you. They view you as very creative and imaginative I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if you had your own sound and genre. You know what your fans want and you articulate that into your music/acting or any type of celebrity you want to be. You give off big sister/brother energy tbh just very reliable and people come to you with their problems. (You may have Pisces in your chart or a Neptune based chart) you only like when people see you succeed so a lot of the time your fans never see you in a bad light because you only give out positive energy. Very hardworking as well.

ꪗꪮꪊ𝘳 ᠻꪖꪀ𝘴

Your fans are… questionably intense they do not play about you whatsoever this is giving very much die hard fans however I’m getting that your fans have a reputation for saying and doing toxic stuff so your fans do give you a bad reputation in a sense. HUGE fan base however i feel like your art really touches the soul for most of these people. It’s giving heavy Aries energy and Leo actually just fire signs in general. Your fans are very independent people and you may preach individuality in your artistry. There is a good side to your fan base however is that they really can make change happen it’s honestly giving BTS Army and their popularity that is what is reminds me of. They are very territorial of you. Also a lot of your fans may be physically blessed look wise.

ꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ ꪮ𝘳 ᠻꫀꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ?

Both. You have the great ability to attract both gazes with your individuality and that is an extremely great attribute to have in the entertainment industry. You probably thought you would be the male gaze however your fan base is just strong and powerful and the power it has also consist of feminine power.

ᦔꪖ𝓽𝓲ꪀᧁ ꪶ𝓲ᠻꫀ

Emotionally unavailable is what this is giving. I don’t think you’ll be too wrapped up in the dating scene I feel like your artistry is much more important to you than dating or risking what you have. It’s not that you won’t have any options in fact you’ll have PLENTY but I feel like your just not interested in them because you have you walls up in terms of dating idk if you have been hurt in the past or you really just don’t care about relationships but yeah you want be wrapped up in the dating scene you’ll be the type to marry a fan and call it a day. I doubt you’ll have any relationships within the industry.

᭙ꫝꪖ𝓽 ꪗꪮꪊ ᭙ꪮꪊꪶᦔ ᥇ꫀ ᥴꪖꪀᥴꫀꪶꪶꫀᦔ ᠻꪮ𝘳

Your fans lmao. Like I said your fans are pretty ruthless like they might have a reputation of doxing people. You would probably have to control them or find a way to sub stain them because they will be your downfall if not. Every fan group has its bad eggs but your bad eggs are 60% of the fan base.

ρ𝓲ꪶꫀ 3 (𝘴ꫝꪖᦔꪮ᭙ ᭙ꪮꪑꪖꪀ)

ꫝꪮ᭙ ρꫀꪮρꪶꫀ ᭙𝓲ꪶꪶ ꪜ𝓲ꫀ᭙ ꪗꪮꪊ

They view you as very introverted or just keep to yourself. You don’t really let other people in and you move in silence really well like you might randomly drop an album or something you’re included in on a random Tuesday afternoon with no pre warning. You’re perceived as more dark not in a bad way but like in a you might literally like to wear dark clothing or like to wear black. Your style in artistry may be on the more unique side. You probably won’t be very active on social media just very secretive. People view you as someone who can take a lot of shit. They actually believe you went through some hard stuff and tbh you might have. They feel as though you have a lot of disappointments within your artistry like you may like something one day and may not the other day kind of indecisive. They feel as though you are underrated and under appreciated. Your artistry is truly like no other and people don’t understand why you are not getting the attention you deserve.

ꪗꪮꪊ𝘳 ᠻꪖꪀ𝘴

I don’t feel like your fan base will be that big and tbh that can be a good thing especially when that entails paparazzi and stalkers. Although small it will be mighty. Your fans are very passionate about getting you and your art more recognition. They may reply or watch your art constantly to make you more money. They are very consistent but you may need to work on making your fans happy because they may feel like at times you don’t appreciate them because you don’t post regularly or you may forget that you are famous and just kind of neglect them so be careful with that. Unlike you these people are happy I feel like your fan base mostly consist of people who have that “I can fix them” mentality.

ꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ ꪜ𝘴 ᠻꫀꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ?

Both however the female gaze is a little more prominent here. About 30% male and 60% female gaze. There is something about you that entices feminine audiences. You may have a lot of people in the LGBT+ community or you yourself may be of the community but regardless both will be there.

ᦔꪖ𝓽𝓲ꪀᧁ ꪶ𝓲ᠻꫀ

Your dating life won’t be open to the public you keep that very private. However what’s interesting is I feel as though you might get into a relationship with another artist from the industry. You’ll just keep it very private and hidden and nobody will know about it. There is very few people that you are willing to open yourself up to and I feel as though it probably won’t go public until marriage. Very private can’t get much info.

᭙ꫝꪖ𝓽 ꪗꪮꪊ ᭙ꪮꪊꪶᦔ ᥇ꫀ ᥴꪖꪀᥴꫀꪶꪶꫀᦔ ᠻꪮ𝘳

Pissing people off within the industry. I feel like you don’t really like “fake” people and the industry is filled with them so you may have to resting bitch face and people won’t like it because they will feel as though you are disrespectful when in reality you just aren’t gonna fake smile for anyone if you don’t feel happy your not going to smile.

ρ𝓲ꪶꫀ 4 (ꪀꫀᥴ𝘬ꪶ𝓲ꪀꫀ)

ꫝꪮ᭙ ρꫀꪮρꪶꫀ ᭙𝓲ꪶꪶ ꪜ𝓲ꫀ᭙ ꪗꪮꪊ

People view you as someone who had a bad past however you fixed yourself and your mentality. By bad past I mean like things relating to trauma so you may be open to telling your past or people just have that belief of you. Like to could concur anything if you tried. Very multi-talented. You don’t like sticking with one thing you like to experiment like pile 1 however unlike pile 1 you guys like to dabble in things but you will never go out of your comfort zone. You’re not impulsive and you always have a plan. You like things to go accordingly and you may have Virgo placements in your chart. They view you as someone who is very self aware and you know your limits and what you are good at. They feel your very empathic and considerate. You will always try to do your best to make life enjoyable for the next person. You will definitely spoil your fans with content. There will always be something new about you to watch. You also may think quick to responses which make you witty. However be careful not to seem too “fake” just be real and be you I feel like you want to known as perfect. You make people feel safe and protected especially your fans. It’s giving MOTHER.

ꪗꪮꪊ𝘳 ᠻꪖꪀ𝘴

Your fans will feel very connected and personal to you. It’s giving mother and child relationship like they take your advice with the most consideration out of everyone. Your fans are not a mess you have very coordinated fans like the type to organize a concert or organize a meet and greet for you. I feel like your fans will be majority of adults because there is a sense of maturity here and appreciation unlike any of the piles they really admire you but you need to be careful not to let this go to far because I’m seeing that it may go too far with a very small percentage they may try to imitate you. But for the most part your fans represent a part of you and you will NOT let them embarrass you. Neutral level of fame not too big and not too small.

ꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ ꪜ𝘴 ᠻꫀꪑꪖꪶꫀ ᧁꪖɀꫀ?

You manage to not only capture both gazes but other gazes as well, literally everybody. Well not literally but your fan base is very diverse. A bit more on the male gaze about 55% while female is 45% very close nonetheless. You’re very physically attractive and your personality is very likable. You have the ability to adapt well to each personality.

ᦔꪖ𝓽𝓲ꪀᧁ ꪶ𝓲ᠻꫀ

Let’s just say there is never a dull moment in your romantic life that’s for sure. You will have many powerful suitors millionaires, Athletes, singers, just people who have lots of influence you catch their eyes. I’m seeing you’ll mostly date within the industry and you’ll probably go through consistent breakups as you want to find “the one” but you will find them eventually. They will be an artist like you or in that field.

᭙ꫝꪖ𝓽 ꪗꪮꪊ ᭙ꪮꪊꪶᦔ ᥇ꫀ ᥴꪖꪀᥴꫀꪶꪶꫀᦔ ᠻꪮ𝘳

You would probably cause drama due to relationships. Like you may have broken up with someone powerful and dated another powerful person and now they have beef and etc. just drama out of love and you’ll somehow get involved in the mix.

Thank you for reading let me know what you think in the comments, follow for more 💜

#pac reading #tarot #tarot reading #pick a pile #pick a card #tarotblr #pick a picture #celebrity #pick a card reading #pick a photo #pick an image

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justagalwhowrites · 2 months

Text

Yearling - Ch. 32: Promises

Joel adjusts to life in Jackson after his brush with death. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-31 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: References to canon-typical violence. Smut :). No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only

Length: 9.5k

A/N: Hi y'all. If you're still looking at this fic but have skipped the last few chapters because of spoilers, this is a pretty safe chapter to jump back in at. You do need to understand that Joel was nearly killed in an encounter with an unnamed person while on patrol and that someone was looking for him in particular to have the context for this chapter. If you have any questions, feel free to DM me.

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

December, 2027

“No.”

“Baby…”

“I said no, Joel.”

You stalked off to another room and Joel could feel your frustration from where he sat on the couch.

He sighed, debating whether or not to follow you or if he should stay where he was and let you cool off.

It wasn’t the first time the two of you had had this discussion over the last six weeks.

Joel had made significant recovery since the incident in November. His leg had mostly healed, though he still walked with a slight limp. But he could breathe deeply without feeling the burning pain of broken ribs now. And the parts of him the doctors had to cut away so he would survive - part of his liver, part of his intestine, one of his kidneys - no longer constantly hurt to the point of occasional agony. Everything was tolerable now, if not necessarily what it was before.

As a result, he was starting to go a little stir crazy. Admittedly, the doctors hadn’t cleared him for anything too strenuous - though he wondered how much of that was your doing versus theirs - but he wanted to start preparing to go back to the life he had in Jackson. One where he felt fulfilled, like he had his place in the community and a way to contribute.

You, however, weren’t too happy with that plan.

Joel sighed and got up from the couch, the muscle in his leg burning as he did. Things still hurt and pulled at first - and he was sure getting on a horse would be uncomfortable at best - but it would pass. Or he’d get used to it.

Either way, he wasn’t content with continuing to sit in his house and rot.

“Sweetheart,” he said, finding you in the kitchen.

You closed the fridge door with too much force, making the jars of canned produce inside rattle.

“No,” you said, adding milk to a cup of tea on the counter. “Find a place to sit, I don’t want you spilling hot tea all over yourself.”

“I’m not a kid,” he said, a little defensive. “I know perfectly well what I’m capable of…”

“No, you don’t,” you said, leveling him with a glare before returning the milk to the fridge and pointing to his spot at the table. “Now sit.”

Joel squared his jaw for a moment before going for the kitchen table - trying to walk with as little a limp as he could manage even though it fucking hurt - and sitting down there. He took a deep breath as you got the mugs of tea and carried them to the table, setting one in front of him and the other in front of the seat he’d come to think of as yours. You settled in beside him, holding the mug with both hands, seemingly determined to not actually look at him.

“We need to talk about it,” he said gently.

“I’m not going to discuss you going out there to get yourself fucking killed, Joel,” you snapped. “I’m not doing it, I’m not going through that again. End of story.”

Joel tried to remind himself that he wouldn’t feel any differently if he were in your position. He couldn’t blame you for it.

You’d been a mess when he woke up. It had just taken him a few minutes to really realize it.

It was like you couldn’t get close enough to him once you were against him, clinging to him as you tried to not disturb him or put any weight on him. But once he got you settled, you fell asleep quickly.

Joel, however, was wide awake. Part of him was afraid to go to sleep again. He didn’t want to not wake up, he wasn’t confident enough that he would. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been unconscious but it felt like he’d slept enough for a lifetime.

So he just held onto you. He soaked up the feel of you in his arms, a sensation he thought he’d never have again. He tried to pick through the fog of his mind, remember what had happened before, but it felt so far away, nothing but a haze of blood and hurt before your voice was there. After a while, he left it alone.

But you didn’t sleep the way you normally did. At first, you seemed stiff, like you were still conscious enough to be worried about hurting him. That didn’t last too long. Your whole body relaxed, as limp and pliant as you were when he’d just made you come again and again. But you almost never actually found rest that way. Even with Joel beside you, there was part of you that was always tense and ready to defend yourself. A byproduct, he was sure, of years of torment that could strike at any time. You only slept that way when you were at the point of total exhaustion, when your body physically couldn’t be on guard anymore.

As much as he wanted to talk to you - ask you what happened, how you were feeling, how long he’d been like this - he wanted you to rest more. You needed it, your whole body desperate for it. So when his door opened just as the light in the room shifted to the pink and orange of dawn, his hold on you tightened ever so slightly.

Carol, one of the doctors, didn’t even notice him watching her come in at first, nearly jumping out of her skin when she realized that his eyes were open.

“Joel!” She yelped and you stirred ever so slightly against him. He held you tighter.

“Shhh,” he hushed her before whispering, soft and low. “She needs her rest. Don’t think she’s had much of that lately.”

“But…”

“I’m not goin’ anywhere,” he said. “Let ‘er sleep. Can look me over in a bit.”

She rolled her eyes but left all the same and he watched you, lost in you. You’d survived. He remembered being afraid that you wouldn’t but you had, and so had he. He trailed his fingers gently over your exposed skin, marveling at the softness of you, that you loved and trusted him enough to let your softness be this close.

The sun was high when the door opened again, not easing open this time but flying, Ellie tearing into the room in a blur of wild hair and disheveled clothes. The door smacking into the wall made you wake with a jolt and he held you close as he felt that tension shock back into your limbs.

“Joel!” Ellie barreled over to him and he couldn’t help but smile as she skidded to a stop at his bedside as you sat up.

“Hey baby girl.”

“You’re awake,” her voice was thick as she sat down near you at the edge of the bed. “Fuck, I didn’t…”

“Are you OK?” He asked, trying to look her over.

“I’m fine,” she waved him off. “You scared the shit out of me but I’m fine. The doc said I needed to get you to let her look you over? What the fuck, Joel?”

“Joel!” You looked down at him, wide awake now, his head propped up on pillows.

“You needed rest,” he shrugged.

“You needed to be examined by a doctor!” You snapped, unfolding yourself from your place at his side. He tried to hold onto you but you leveled him with a glare. “After everything we did to get you here alive, don’t even start.”

He tried very hard not to laugh.

“Whatever you say, baby.”

He seemed to frustrate you a lot after that. You talked to the doctors more than he did, never leaving his side and listening to everything they said with a hard look on your face. He tried to ask more about what happened to you - he remembered you bleeding and your face was still damaged but healing - but you changed the subject back to him immediately every time.

Joel was ready for things to go back to normal as quickly as he could manage but you were nervous, hesitant. The first time you dared leave him at the clinic, something happened with a horse and Olivia came to get you. It was the third day he was awake and you were gone long enough that he was able to get out of bed and try to walk on his own. He didn’t make it very far, all but falling into a chair near the door after using the wall to haphazardly balance as he went. The chair smacked into the wall and Joel heard scrambling from the hall before Carol threw open the door, her eyes wide and panicky before she saw where Joel had ended up.

“Are you trying to get yourself hurt?” She demanded as she helped him back to bed.

“No,” he said, defensive. “I’m tryin’ to get myself back to normal…”

“Joel, you’re 60 years old…”

“Don’t remind me.”

“…And injuries take time to recover from. You’re not a young man anymore, you can’t push yourself the way you used to.”

“I’m not a young man anymore,” he agreed as she helped lower him to the bed, his body seeming so hulking and large beside hers. “I can’t afford to waste time bein’ useless.”

“Recovery isn’t useless,” she narrowed her eyes at him. “If you’re not going to listen to me then you need to listen to that woman of yours, Joel. Take it easy and don’t do things like get up without someone there to help if you need it.”

Carol was nice enough to not tell you about the fact that he got out of bed and walked to the chair, at least. But she had distinctly sided with you in all matters related to his recovery after that, as had Tommy, Ellie, Maria and Savvy.

It didn’t help that there were clearly conversations happening that no one wanted to tell him about. He heard raised voices from the front room of the clinic one day, you and Ellie going back and forth about something he couldn’t quite make out until there was the sharp boom of Tommy’s voice ending the conversation.

“Care to tell me what that was this afternoon?” He asked as you settled into his side to sleep after Ellie and Tommy had gone home for the night.

“Depends on how pissed off you want to be,” you replied, draping your arm gingerly over his chest and settling in with your head on his shoulder.

“Not gonna piss me off,” he said gently. You had shrugged out of the button down of his that you’d worn that day before climbing in bed, stripped down to the tank top below and he could feel your skin so easily like this, his hand skimming over your bared arm. You pressed yourself closer.

“Yes it is,” you said quietly, stretching and kissing his throat before settling at his side again.

“Can’t go the rest of our lives without shit pissin’ me off, baby,” he said gently. “Don’t think I can handle you treatin’ me like glass the whole time, either.”

“I just worry,” you said softly. “I don’t want to do this without you, can’t give you a damn heart attack because Ellie has some scheme…”

“So it’s Ellie that’s causin’ the trouble,” he said.

You groaned.

“Fine,” you said. “Better not get all worked up and just let me handle it. Trust me when I say I have it, Joel, I really do…”

“Baby.”

You sighed again.

“From what Tommy was conscious for and what little you remember,” you said slowly. “The people who… those people. They were after you. Specifically you. And Ellie… she hasn’t taken kindly to that.”

“Alright…”

“She wants to go find them,” you sighed. “She thinks she can handle it…”

“No,” he said, already moving to get up but you held him down.

“Joel.”

“She’s not doin’ that…”

“I know she’s not,” you said, still holding him in place. “I told you, Tommy and I have it handled.”

“I don’t want her to go after them,” Joel said, letting himself relax back into the mattress and your hold on him eased. “Don’t want any of you putting yourself at risk on some damn fool mission…”

“I know.”

“She needs to get that shit outta her head…”

“I know, Joel.”

He sighed.

“This is such a fuckin’ mess. All of it.”

“It doesn’t matter,” you said quietly, nuzzling in closer to him. “All that matters is you’re alive and you’re here. We’ll figure it out.”

You figuring it out, apparently, just meant keeping Joel under lock and key for the foreseeable future. Your jaw was set tight across the table and you fidgeted with your mug, your thumb tapping out a stuttering rhythm on the handle.

“I need to contribute,” Joel said gently. You glared at him. “Sweetheart…”

“You can contribute without leaving Jackson,” you said. “Your value here isn’t limited to going on fucking patrol…”

“It’s a big part of my value, Baby, yeah,” he said. “I don’t got a lot of skills…”

“You were a contractor before,” you snapped. “You think buildings here don’t need to be repaired? That things don’t need to be constructed? Do that, let them take you out of the patrol rotation.”

“I’m not gonna hide,” he said, trying to get you to look at him even as you seemed bound and determined not to. “I want to get back out there, I want to do my part…”

“Your part doesn’t include getting fucking murdered, Joel!”

“I sure hope it doesn’t,” he reached out and took your hand, his thumb running over your knuckles. “I want to be here, with you, for a good, long time, baby. But I can’t… I can’t be something I’m not. And I’m not someone who just lets other people take on all the risk while he sits at home, on his ass…”

“Joel.”

“You say you love me,” he said. You actually met his eyes with that, glassy and wet at the edges.

“Of course I love you,” you said, not as harsh now. “I love you so goddamn much, I can’t lose you, I can’t, do you understand me?”

“I know, Baby,” he reached out, his large hand cupping your face. “And I’m not planning on going anywhere. But I can’t be the man you love by hidin’ away and waitin’ for trouble to come to someone else. I need to be the one to handle it. Me. I need to take care of my own business, need to look after you, need to take care of our girls. I can’t do that here, acting like I’m not capable of doing my part. I’m going back out there, Baby, and I’d like to do it knowin’ that you’ll still be speaking to me when I get back.”

“You don’t get to ask me to watch you hurt yourself,” your voice was thick. “I will not watch you die, Joel. I’m not going to do it and you don’t get to ask me to.”

“I’m not,” he said gently. “But, Sweetheart, if I am gonna go? I’d like to go out as myself. And that means going back out on patrol.”

Your eyes searched his for a moment before you all but collapsed against his shoulder, your arms snaking up around his neck, a sob cracking through you. He put his arms around you, rocking you gently.

Part of him had been waiting for this to happen. Beyond when he caught you off guard when he first woke up, you’d been nothing but strong and stoic. The only time there was a hint of anything else was when the two of you went to bed at night. You clung to him then, Joel swallowing any hint of hurt you accidentally caused when you held him tight. You breathed him in deep, pressed as much skin to him as you could manage. Sometimes, those deep breaths were shaky ones, like you were trying not to cry. He just held onto you, wishing you’d say something - anything - so he’d know how you were feeling. But you didn’t. So he took care of you the best way he could while you were focused on taking care of him.

“It’s alright,” his hand spread wide over your back, keeping a slow and steady rhythm as it ran up and down your spine. Your tears were racking, choking, making your whole body shake. “You’re OK, I’ve got you, s’alright…”

“I can’t,” you sobbed against him. “I can’t, I can’t… you can’t leave me, Joel, you can’t.”

“M’not gonna leave you, Baby,” he said softly. “I promise you. I’ll always come home to you.”

“You can’t know that,” you sniffed, your sobs calming to sniffles. “Seeing you like that…”

“I know,” he said quietly. He’d seen you nearly dead enough times, he knew. He understood it. “I’m sorry, Baby, I’m so sorry…”

“Then why are you insisting on trying to go back out there,” you sat back from him. “If you understood it, you’d stay here with me and with Ellie and Savvy, you wouldn’t do this. Not to yourself, not to me, not to them…”

“I know,” he said again, looking in your eyes, begging you to understand. “But that girl… she took a lot from me, baby. A few organs, more time than I really want. Almost took my future with you and the girls. Not gonna let her take who I am, too. And I need to go back out there. Not gonna just hide in here, afraid, for the rest of my life.”

Your eyes searched his, wide and wet, and then you sighed.

“I have conditions. If you expect me to be OK with this…”

“Of course,” he said quickly. “What are they?”

“You go out with Tommy or me,” you said. “No one else. I don’t trust you out there with Jesse or fucking Gene…”

“They were tryin’ to do the right thing…”

“The right thing was saving you,” you snapped. “You go out with Tommy or with me or not at all.”

“Alright,” he said. “You or Tommy. At least to start.”

You glared at him for a moment but you pressed on.

“You don’t even think about going out until you’re fully cleared by both doctors,” you said. “None of this second opinion bullshit, they’re both on board or you don’t go.”

“I can do that,” he nodded slowly. “You’re being very reasonable, Baby, I’m impressed…”

“Oh, fuck off.”

He laughed a little and tugged you closer to press a kiss to your temple. You melted into his chest, head nestling against his shoulder so that your nose brushed his neck.

“I promise, I don’t have a death wish,” he said, thumb tracing a path over your arm. “I always want to come home to you. I just need to do this, too.”

“I know,” you said softly. “I’m just… I’m so scared with you. All the time, I’m so afraid. It’s different than with Savvy, I’ve always been afraid with her. Scared I was gonna drop her or accidentally hurt her or not teach her the right thing or teach her too much. Scared I couldn’t save her. She’s my heart just walking around outside my body, I’m used to being afraid with her. But it’s different than how I feel about you and I just… I’ve never loved someone the way I love you and I don’t know how to live with being afraid of losing that.”

He took a deep breath and held you a little tighter.

“Know the feeling.”

It was just a few days to Christmas and preparations were in full swing. The tree was up in the middle of town, lights lined the buildings, Julie had been hoarding supplies for some kind of holiday cocktail that she claimed was a surprise that you were highly skeptical of. You, Ellie and Savvy had picked a tree for his living room just the week before and set it up, Savvy standing back with a slight frown on her face the whole time.

“What’s up, baby girl?” Joel asked, sitting in an arm chair as he watched you and Ellie decorate. His leg wasn’t quite up for standing that much yet.

“It’s just…” She looked at him for a moment and perched on the arm of the chair before looking back at you. “People really did this before? Put trees in their houses?”

“Yeah,” Joel smiled up at her. “They did. Biggest holiday of the year for a lot of the world, trees inside stores and offices and shit, too.”

She crossed her arms, her brows knitting together as she frowned.

“She never did this with me,” she said quietly. “I read about Christmas in a book once but it didn’t talk about this part and she didn’t talk about it much when I asked and… I don’t get it.”

Joel nodded slowly. Savvy was still warming up to you. She seemed skeptical of your motivations, of your intentions, of everything you said. It was hard to tell how much of it was teenaged cynicism and how much was rooted in her feelings of abandonment. But since you’d all but moved into Joel’s house, she’d been around you more and more and you did your best to let her guide it. He could tell how much it was killing you, though. He knew the feeling well, remembering back to the days when Ellie wouldn’t even look at him. He could tell how badly you wanted to cling to her. He saw how much you wanted her to stay close and tell you everything in the way you hung on her every word, the way you watched the door for a full minute after she left to go back to Ellie’s. But you needed her to be OK with it more. That just didn’t make things any easier.

“What did she tell you?” Joel asked, keeping his voice low enough that it wouldn’t rise over the Christmas carols you’d put on the stereo.

“Stuff she did with her parents,” she shrugged. “That her brothers would tease her about being bad… None of this stuff.”

“Well,” Joel said slowly. “Think she told you the important stuff.”

She looked at him, skeptical.

“The important stuff ain’t the decorations, it’s the people,” he said. “She couldn’t give you the other things so she told you about your family. Don’t think she was trying to hide anything from you. She shared with you what mattered.”

She nodded slowly and looked toward the tree again until Ellie turned around and called her over to put an ornament on the tree. You bit your lip as you watched her do it, your eyes wide and soft and you hesitantly put a hand on her shoulder, giving her a squeeze when she stepped back to look at her handiwork.

Joel was steadfastly trying to focus on the holiday instead of the tension that had settled over the town since his attack. Patrols had been ramped up, sending people out in small groups instead of pairs. There were growing signs of people present in the wilderness, more xes on trees and remains of fires. Tommy had told Joel - much to your chagrin - that the prevailing theory was they were marking Jackson territory, the signs always found at the edges of where patrols ran. As though someone was watching for where they could seize power. Everyone was on tenterhooks, waiting for something worse to happen.

But the build up to Christmas seemed to have taken everyone’s minds off the looming threat. Joel was thankful for it. It seemed to have lightened your mood some, too - part of why he decided to bring up the patrol issue yet again.

He didn’t tell you that he was set to see Carol the next day to hopefully get cleared for patrol. And… other activities.

The cruelty of the timing of the attack hadn’t been lost on Joel. He’d just gotten you back, hadn’t even had 12 damn hours with you before he had to leave for patrol and then almost never came back. But he’d lived and, while you’d been close ever since, you weren’t close enough.

He wanted you.

That wasn’t quite right, he always wanted you. He was pretty sure he’d wanted you since the moment he first saw you. He was beyond that now. He needed you so bad he ached with it, his whole fucking body hurt with it sometimes. But you wouldn’t touch him without the doctors saying it was OK. Even though, at this point, he was starting to think it was medically dangerous to be so fucking wanting.

“Are you goin’ to the stables today?” Joel asked, holding you close. You nodded against him. “You think you’ll be done in time for the movie?”

“Definitely,” you said. “Savvy’s never seen a Christmas movie, not missing that.”

He kissed your forehead.

“Been meanin’ to ask you something,” he said.

“Hm.”

“Think you’ll be my date for the dance tomorrow night?” He asked. You pulled back from him and glared, your eyes still red. He smiled a little. “Know I left it to last minute but I’m hoping…”

“Of course I’ll be your date,” you shoved him ever so lightly. “Who else am I gonna go with? Been cooped up here with you for the last month, all my other prospects have given up on me…”

He laughed and kissed you.

“Guess you’ll just have to be my girl, then.”

“Guess so.”

He kissed you again, deeply, firmly. But it was different than so many other kisses he’d shared with you over the past few weeks. There was heat behind it. A twinge of need and want that tasted so familiar on your tongue. You moaned and adjusted so you were closer to him, your body curving, leg hitching up over his so you could press your mound against his thigh. He gripped you tighter, pulled you closer, but you pulled back with a groan.

“Baby,” he breathed but you shook your head.

“Not going to risk hurting you,” you panted.

“Not gonna hurt me…”

“Not sure I trust your judgement,” you gave him a final, chaste, peck on the lips. “I’ll see you tonight, walk over with you and the girls.”

“Have a good day,” he said.

“I will if you take it easy,” you replied, extracting yourself gently from his grip and heading out the door.

He watched you leave and waited for a few minutes to make sure you were gone before he got up, too. It was almost Christmas and there were things he wanted to do.

***

Joel looked far too pleased with himself, his hand on your thigh as you sat beside him at the Tipsy Bison. You had one of Julie’s special cocktails - something she called the Grinch and tasted like mint - and were well on your way to being tipsy for the first time in months.

Savvy and Ellie were sitting with some friends - Dina, Jesse, the boy from school you suspected Savvy had a crush on named Kyle - and looked to be having fun. You hoped Savvy would talk to you about it later. She’d been opening up a little bit more, never fully pulling away like she had for so long. You took what you could get, thankful that she was willing to speak to you at all.

She’d gone with you, Joel and Ellie to the movie the night before. It was Miracle on 34th Street. She seemed to enjoy it, smiling and watching the screen in wonder, soaking it all in. It was bittersweet to see. You’d always wanted to be able to give her these things, the kinds of things you remembered loving as a girl at the holidays. But there was a certain cruelty in it, too. She’d never see a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, never visit a mall Santa. Jackson brought her closer to the life you’d led as a girl but it was still so far away and it was hard, not being able to share it with her.

But Ellie had talked her into spending Christmas Day with you and Joel. You’d damn near kissed her when she told you and you felt a little like you had as a child on Christmas Eve, the greatest gift you could have ever asked for, spending the day with Savvy, Joel and Ellie all together.

But Joel seemed as excited as you were, a small smile tugging at his lips as you sat across from Tommy and Maria.

“Can’t believe it’s Christmas again,” Maria said, taking a drink of his beer. “Swear, time goes by faster and faster every damn year.”

“I’ll take time goin’ faster as long as that means it’s still goin’,” Joel replied.

“Know that’s right,” Tommy shook his head a little, half smile on his face. “We’re all still standing and after the last year, seems like the best I can ask for.”

“Y’all doing anything special for William this year?” You asked, turning your cocktail glass slowly in your fingers. “He’s getting big enough to know what’s going on now.”

“Santa’s planning to make a visit,” Tommy smiled a little. “He’s been pretty good lately, figure that should be rewarded.”

You smiled back, looking toward Savvy. She was facing the boy on the bench next to her and his fingers traced the outside of her knee and she smiled.

The music changed, the strains of the song familiar. Hallelujah. You looked toward Joel and he smiled a little wider, the change so subtle you doubted anyone but you would notice.

“This is hardly a Christmas song.”

“There’s an argument to be made,” he said. “Heard it on the radio sometimes at Christmastime, it counts.”

He took his hand off your thigh and held it out to you. An offering.

“C’mon, baby,” his eyes were hot on you. “Call it an early Christmas present.”

You put your hand in his and let him lead you to the dance floor. You draped your arms over his shoulders, fingers trailing through his hair as he tugged your body close to his.

“See?” He said, tracing your nose with his. “Not so bad.”

“Helps when you’ve got a good partner,” you smiled a little. “How’s that leg of yours doing?”

“Good as new,” he said. “Definitely isn’t gonna keep me from dancing with you, that’s for damn sure.”

You laughed a little before you nestled your head against his chest, sighing contentedly.

“I’m so glad you’re still here to dance with,” you said quietly as you swayed with him. He gave you a gentle squeeze.

“Me too,” he said softly, almost sadly.

“I feel like I wasted so much time,” you whispered, tears pricking the corners of your eyes and making your throat tight. You got like this a lot lately, this haze of what almost was hanging over you. “I should have known better and…”

“Hey,” he said, pulling back from you just enough to look in your eyes. “You didn’t do anything wrong, didn’t waste anything. I gave you a lot of shit to work through, more than you ever should have had to deal with. You did what you needed to do, s’not a waste.”

“What if I’d lost you?” You asked softly. “What if I never came over that night, what if…”

“What if a lot of things,” he cut you off. “Doesn’t matter. We got here. That’s the important thing.”

He pulled you back against him and you pressed your ear to his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

“Gotta ask,” he said, tone lighter after a moment. “Never had any of those fancy dance classes you had. How do I hold up compared to the guys who did?”

You laughed once, burying your face in his chest for a moment.

“Best partner I ever had,” you said.

He chuckled a little, his lips brushing your forehead.

“Good.”

You held him closer, moving with him slowly on the dance floor for a while. You weren’t sure how long. You let yourself get lost in him. The way he swayed in time to a rhythm your body was more in tune with than your mind, the way he felt so warm as he wrapped around you, the way his heart beat and the rise and fall of his chest were constant and stable. The way he was whole in your arms. It was like you could finally relax into that reality, you’d reached a point that you weren’t just scared anymore. He was here, he wasn’t going to fade away to nothing in the night. His heart would keep beating, his chest would keep rising, you wouldn’t need to find a way to do this without him.

“Ready to go?” He asked softly after what felt like a while. “Want to get you home.”

“Yeah,” you said, separating from him enough to look at him. “Let’s go.”

You went and said your goodbyes to Tommy and Maria and Joel stopped by the girls’ table - scaring the shit out of Kyle by the look of it, Kyle’s eyes wide and terrified - before lacing his fingers with yours for the walk home.

“What did you say to them?” You asked, walking close enough to him that you could feel the slight limp he had now.

“Told ‘em to get home at a reasonable time,” he shrugged. “And no boys behind closed doors. Don’t want that Kyle kid gettin’ any ideas…”

You snorted.

“It looked like you threatened to castrate the boy,” you said. “I don’t want anyone taking advantage of Savvy but I don’t want everyone terrified to date her, either.”

“Didn’t get that specific with it,” Joel said, a little defensive. “Just made it clear that someone was watchin’. And that someone was me.”

You smiled and shook your head a little.

“You’re ridiculous,” you said. “But… thank you. For taking care of my daughter.”

He looked at you, his face serious as you came to a stop at his front walk.

“Course,” he said. “She’s an amazing kid, Bambi. You did a great job with her. And… might not deserve it but… feels like she’s mine, too. Love her like she’s mine. Hope that’s OK.”

You looked at him for a moment, his eyes soft and warm, the lines of his face familiar landscapes. For a moment, it was as though your heart had broken open with him, cracked down to the center because the love you had for him couldn’t be held there anymore. You pulled him close to you, kissing him soft and deep.

Or it started that way, at least. But his body against yours, the sharpness of your love in your chest, the taste of him on your tongue pushed you into desire. It didn’t take much to spark it - it had been so long since you’d had him - but once it was there, it burned hot and fast, swallowing the reminder that you should keep yourself under control quickly.

“C’mon,” Joel said against your lips, breathless. “Let’s go inside.”

You nodded and followed him inside, using the short walk from the street to his front door as a chance to try to get the want that was flaring inside you under control. It was too soon, it had to be too soon and you weren’t going to risk Joel’s health just because you were aching to have him as close as possible.

Joel pulled you back against him as he he closed the door behind the two of you, tilting your head to give him better access to your mouth, his fingertips sinking into your skin as he gripped you tight. You swallowed a moan and tried to keep yourself from giving in even as you pressed yourself closer to him.

“Joel,” you breathed, pulling your lips from his, his hands still holding you against him. “We… we should stop…”

“Don’t need to,” he said, kissing you gently again.

“Joel…”

“Went to the doctor today,” he kissed over the line of your jaw, following the curve of your bones up to your temple where his lips lingered. “Said there’s a lot I’m allowed to do now. Including everything I want to do to you.”

He trailed kisses down to your neck and you moaned as his lips pressed into the sensitive skin there.

“I’ll beg if I have to,” he whispered. “But I need you, baby. Need to have you close, need to be inside of you.”

“Fuck,” you panted, eyes closed, fighting to focus. “Are…” his mouth found a particularly sensitive spot, kissing and sucking you gently and sending goosebumps spreading over your skin. “Jesus… are you… are you sure? I don’t want you gettin’ hurt…”

“I’m sure,” he said softly, finally pulling his lips from your skin to look in your eyes again, your body cradled against his. “Bein’ apart from you has damn near killed me. Need to feel you.”

“Need you, too,” you breathed, caving to your baser instincts. “Please, Joel.”

He kissed you again and you could taste the desperation on his tongue, heat pooling between your hips. He guided you toward the stairs as he shrugged out of his coat and pushed yours off your shoulders and down your arms. He left both in a heap on the floor, keeping his mouth against your own until the two of you were at the base of the stairs. You only separated long enough to go up them, Joel pulling you back against him on the second story landing.

You let him guide you, tried to focus on being gentle with him instead of pulling him to you and pressing him against you the way you wanted.

But you could only resist so long. You tugged at his shirt, pulling at the buttons until you could shove it down his arms and toss it to the floor, too. He did the same with yours, discarding it in the hall before pulling you into his bedroom, nudging the door closed with his foot. It wasn’t long before you were both naked next to his bed, bodies pressed close and tight, his cock thick and hard and weeping against your stomach.

You took control then, turning him in your arms so that he was against the bed. He lowered himself back onto it slowly, his grip on you gentle but secure so you were on his lap, straddling him as you kissed him.

“Really fucking missed you,” he whispered, kissing down your jaw to your neck to your chest. He rocked his hips up against you, his thick shaft nestled against your clit, the motion making you moan. “Goddamn, missed you so much.”

His hands slipped over your skin to your breasts, cupping and cradling them before lavishing his hot, wet mouth over the soft swell of flesh there. He sucked a nipple into his mouth with a needy groan and you couldn’t help but roll your hips against him as he did, your tight, hot center clenching and gripping at nothing, desperate for something to pull deep inside. Joel’s tongue teased the firm nub between his lips, licking and sucking you, making you moan and rock yourself against him on his lap before moving to the other breast, giving you the same treatment there.

“Joel,” you whimpered, fingers tangling in his curls. He pulled his mouth from your chest to look in your eyes, his gaze soft and hot like starlight.

“Think you can come like this for me?” He asked softly. “Want you to come for me, want you to be so wet and soft inside for me, think you can do that?”

You just nodded and his hands slid around to your back as he buried his face in your throat before going back to your breasts as he rutted his thick, dripping length up against your clit, the silken firmness of him pressing close and tight against your wet heat. You ground your hips down against him, desperate for more, to be as close as you could be to him, his body determinedly angled to keep you from working him into you. There was a tightening ache in you, the burn of need for something that was just out of reach making your head spin and pleasure spool.

“Just gotta come for me,” his voice was hot and needy. “Just come for me, all you gotta do. Just come, just come, please baby, just come, want to feel you come like this, you can give me that, know you can…”

His desperate words were what you needed, the tension in you rising until you felt like you were going to break with wanting before your orgasm hit you hard, a wave of pleasure rolling over you. It was sharp, you hadn’t come in weeks, and you could feel all of it. How your clit throbbed against his cock, how your entranced pulsed and grasped at the root of him, how it seemed like your entire being was trying to pull him into yourself.

“Oh fuck,” he held you tight to him, his cock pressed tight against you, so firm that you could feel him against your pubic bone. “Fuck, just like that. Gonna feel so good inside you baby, gonna be so goddamn good, just get all that come all over me, feel so good drippin’ all over me.”

You dropped your head to his shoulder, body going limp for a moment as your orgasm finished. Joel cradled you to him before going to adjust you on the bed but you stopped him, sitting up again and pressing back on his shoulders.

“Baby,” he groaned but you took his face in your hands and tilted his head so you could kiss him, really kiss him, the kind of kiss that was more hungry and consuming and claiming than anything else.

“Let me,” you whispered when you pulled your lips from his just enough to speak. He let you adjust him then, until he was flat on his back in the middle of the bed, your folded legs bracketing his thighs. You stroked his cock - wet with your come and leaking his own arousal - before rising onto your knees to notch his thick head at your entrance. Joel’s hands went to your thighs, his thumb tracing the scar there, the one from the knife you’d taken to the leg when trying to save him. His eyes were trained on it, his fingertips digging into your flesh more sharply there than your other leg. His eyes traced up your body to the scar at your stomach, just as harsh and red and raw as the one at your leg.

“Not tonight,” you said quietly. His eyes found yours. “It’s not about that tonight.”

He didn’t say anything. Instead, his callused hands slid up your thighs to your hips and you eased down onto his hard length. You moaned as you took him into yourself, his thick cock sinking into your soft heat. He felt so good inside of you, your body remembering just how to make him a part of you. It had been weeks but it didn’t matter, he was built into you now, he fit into you the way no one else ever could, filling and stretching you totally. His breaths stuttered as more and more of him entered you, his fingertips clutching onto the soft flesh of your hips and ass harder and harder with every inch of him that worked its way into you. Just as the ridge of his head ghosted against the back wall of your channel, your hips met his and you let yourself adjust for a moment, savoring the feel of him inside you that way.

Joel was panting for breath below you, his eyes tracing over your body again and again as your channel gripped him.

“You’re so fucking perfect,” he looked in your eyes as he said it. “Most beautiful goddamn thing I’ve ever seen.”

You just moaned a little, your hands coming to rest on the broad expanse of his chest, fingers splaying wide over his skin. But you didn’t move otherwise. He felt too good like this, so deep inside you. You almost didn’t want to move, didn’t care if you didn’t make yourself come with him in you. He was deep inside and he was secure there. You could feel how whole and alive he was, the way his cock throbbed, the pulse of him, the comforting heat. Like this, he was yours. Unquestionably, undoubtedly yours and no one could take him away from you.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” his fingers tightened on you. “I… fuck… I need you to move, baby… I can’t keep goin’ like this, I need… I need you to move, need to feel you, please baby, please.”

You didn’t respond. You just started to rise on his cock, moving your hips slow and shaky over him, making him groan. When just his head was left barely inside your entrance, you thrust back down, his cock splitting you open again, his head falling back, mouth open in a desperate gasp.

You rode him like that for a while, you weren’t sure how long. The slow and aching lift, the devastating reclaiming as you took him again and again almost meditative. You watched each other, lost in the feeling of your bodies together, working in tandem to become something more than just yourselves.

Eventually, Joel tugged you closer, tilting you down until he could reach your face, his large palm curving over your jaw, his thumb pressing into your cheek.

“C’mere,” he whispered in the dim light of the moon on the snow outside his window. “Want to feel more of you.”

You folded yourself into him, your bodies aligned, his cock still buried deep but your chest now against his, your lips overing over his own, noses against each other. Even in the night, you could see the different shades of brown in his iris like this, all of them soft and full of love for you.

His hand slid to the small of your back, tilting your hips just so and holding you there as he started thrusting up into you and making you whimper.

“Let me,” he said softly.

You just nodded, letting him gently work himself into you again and again. The strokes were aching and smooth, almost rocking as he moved inside of you. The deep, full press of his thick cock into all the soft parts of you that existed because of him, the brief moment of feeling so full and whole before the tender rhythm he set within you pulled him back again.

“Joel,” you whimpered, so desperate. You weren’t sure you could even say anything else, every other word you’d ever learned reduced down to the only one that mattered in that moment.

“Together,” he said quietly, never breaking his rhythm. “OK baby? Together.”

You just nodded quickly. Your body was getting tighter and tighter and you kept your eyes on his, breathing the same air, feeling the press of his warm, soft skin into yours as your orgasm built alongside his.

“You’re close,” he said. It wasn’t a question and you didn’t need to answer. He could feel you and you could feel him, too. “I’m gonna come, want you to come with me. Going to fill you up so deep, baby, going to feel me so deep and I need to feel you, too.”

His hand that was on your back pressed into you firmer, taking root at the base of your spine and pushing your hips lower so his cock was deeper longer, his hips pressed against your clit with more heat and tension and, for a moment, it felt as though your entire body was on fire with need before the band of pleasure that had been winding tight inside you snapped. Your orgasm hit you like a wave, rushing out from your core and flooding through the rest of your being just as Joel pressed your hips down and flush with his, holding himself deep as he came with a strangled moan. Your channel fluttered around him, rippling and pulling him into you as he pulsed deep inside. You could feel him so clearly against and inside you, every inch of his skin, every throb of his cock, every gasping breath. You kissed him then, bodies connected in every way, until your orgasms eased and you went limp on top of him. Your head nuzzled against the side of his neck and you breathed in the scent of his skin as you came back down to earth, his arms keeping you flush against him as his cock softened inside of you, the combination of his come and yours already dripping out of you.

“Never goin’ that long without you again,” he said softly, his fingers tracing slow and easy abstract patterns over your skin. You hummed in agreement. “I’m gettin’ to be too old to be so deprived.”

You laughed a little.

“Should start being more careful then,” you said, reaching out to card your fingers through his hair.

“Well now that I have the proper motivation…”

You laughed again and closed your eyes. He held you like that for a while, until goosebumps from the winter air started prickling over your skin. He took you more firmly then, slipping his soft cock from the safe, soft warmth of you and slipping you down beside him on the bed. He pulled a blanket over the two of you and you sighed contentedly. He tugged you closer and you happily obliged, your legs tanging with his as he brushed your hair back before holding your face gently in his large hand. You just smiled a little, eyes on his. He smiled back, just enough that his cheek dimpled.

“You’re still feeling OK?” You asked quietly after a few minutes.

He laughed lightly.

“Whole lot better than OK,” he replied. “I’m amazing. Always amazing when I’m with you.”

You smiled a little wider.

“You know,” he said slowly. “I had a lot of time to think when I thought I was about to die.”

Your smile shifted to a frown but his didn’t, not really. His gaze was just soft, gentle. Like he was trying to leave himself as open as he could to take as much of you in as possible.

“I remember more of that than anything that actually happened in that room. Didn’t have much in the way of regrets,” he continued. “Had you to thank for most of that. Ellie and I had made things right, I was thankful for that. I was thankful you’d come back to me, even if it was just for a night. Thankful I got to tell you I loved you one last time…”

“Joel,” you whispered. His thumb stroked your cheek.

“I saw Sarah,” he said quietly. Your eyes went wide but you stayed silent. “When I was unconscious, I saw her. She was someplace good, somewhere that was bright and warm like her. And there was part of me that wanted to stay with her, take care of her and make sure she was OK. But… most of me wanted to come back here and be with you and the girls. And Sarah… she told me that it wasn’t my time yet. Told me I still had things to do here, that I needed to take care of you and Ellie and Savvy and I just… I knew she was right. I felt it, more than I’d felt so many other things, I felt that. I belong here, next to you. I don’t want to have any regrets when it comes to you but right now… well, I got one big one.”

“What?” You asked quietly, your heart beating faster.

“That I almost died before having the chance to live as your husband,” he said. Your breath caught. “But you saved me, gave me a chance to do it right. And I don’t think I deserve to ask you for a damn thing but I’m hopin’ you’ll let me, anyway. Will you give me that chance? Will you be my wife, will you marry me?”

Your heart was beating so fast that you could hear your blood in your ears. You reached out, hand trembling, and cupped his cheek.

“Of course I will,” you said softly, voice thick and wet. Joel smiled, tears glistening in his eyes, and he kissed you, gentle and deep and lovely, a kiss empty of expectation and full of promise.

When you separated, you just looked at him for a moment, taking him in, the man who would be your husband. The whole concept made you laugh, the sound bubbling up in you.

He just smiled.

“What, baby?”

“I just…” you paused, still laughing a little. “It’s the end of the world, how do you even get married now? Not like there’s a courthouse…”

“Well,” he said, rolling away from you for a moment and reaching into the drawer of his nightstand. You propped yourself up on your elbow and frowned, watching as he rolled back with a small wooden box in his hand. “Figure since the paperwork part don’t exist anymore, we can do it whatever way you want to but…” he opened the box. Inside was two rings, both dark metal, one band slender, the other thick. “Thought I’d make sure this part was covered.”

“Oh Joel,” you sat up all the way, letting the blanket pool around your hips. You took the smaller ring from the box and held it up, looking at it up close. “Where did you find these?”

“Made ‘em,” he said, sitting up, too. “They’re from one of Ares’ old horseshoes. Figured it was only appropriate…”

“They’re perfect,” you breathed, turning it over in your fingers for a moment before looking at him. “Could we… I mean, I know it’s fast but… would you be OK if we just did it now?”

“Did what?”

“Got married,” you said, watching him. “I understand if you want to wait or want the girls there but…”

“How do you want to do it?” He cut you off.

You smiled a little.

“How about we just make promises to each other.”

He smiled back.

“I like it,” he took his ring out and set the box aside. He held it out toward you and you took it before putting your ring in his palm. The two of you faced each other, blankets in your laps, knees brushing under the covers.

He took a deep breath.

“I promise I’ll love you with every part of me,” he said. “And I promise I’ll keep lovin’ you until there’s none of me left.”

“I promise to love you every second of the rest of my life,” you replied. “And every second of whatever comes after, too.”

“I promise to protect you,” he said. “Promise to never let anything hurt you.”

“I promise to take care of you,” you said. “And look out for you and protect you because where you go, I go.”

“I promise to love your girl like she’s my own,” he continued. “And I promise to take care of her and do everything I can to make sure she’s safe and happy.”

“I promise to love Ellie like you do,” you said. “I promise to help guide her and protect her and give her the life she deserves to have.”

You looked at each other for a moment, tears in your eyes, before Joel gently took your left hand in his.

“Think they used to say ‘with this ring, I thee wed,’ or something like that,” he said, thumb tracing your knuckles.

“That sounds right,” you smiled a little.

“Alright then,” he said, lining the ring up with your finger. “With this ring, I thee wed.”

He slipped it into place. It fit perfectly, settling at the base of your finger with a soothing sense of finality. Joel lifted your hand to his mouth and kissed you there, his lips lingering on your skin for a moment before releasing you. You held his ring tight in your palm for a second, warming the metal, before taking Joel’s left hand. You lined the ring up with his finger and took a deep breath before looking him in the eye.

“With this ring, I thee wed.”

You slipped it into place, lacing your fingers with his once it settled where it belonged. You smiled, looking down and seeing his ring on your finger before looking back at him again.

“Think I get to kiss the bride now,” he said.

You laughed.

“I think so, too.”

He pulled you against him gently and kissed you all soft and deep, his lips holding every promise he’d made to you and, for the first time since the end of the world, you knew what it was to feel secure.

Next Chapter

A/N: ❤️

And that's all I have to say about that.

And that there's a lot more story to come. We're not quite to the end yet, I promise.

Thank you for being here and for reading. Love you!

Taglist: @ashleymsnodgrass@planet-marz1@kalea-bane @juneswonderlust@ilovepedro @h-annahayy @starstruckmusiciansartghost@beccerjune@mumma-moonchild@netonetoneto@mellymbee@purplelye@n7cje@flugazi@evyiione@randomhoex@aliengirl99@orcasoul@reds-ramblings@pedropascalsbbg @fupoola @tinypotatothing @knopes-waffles @lilmizmoz @ayamenimthiriel@jenispunk@panda-pascal@sarap-77@flugazi@your-slutty-gf@daniegraceg@partyofone3413@cumberpegg@noisynightmarepoetry.@fifia-writes@grumpygrumperton @srmacaroni @txlady37 @bigboiseason123@ashleyfilm

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #yearling #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc #smut fic

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cooki3face · 4 months

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messages for singles from your divine counterpart:

message: hello, this one’s intended for those who are single, who are manifesting new love or manifesting a divine counterpart or manifesting their person as in “the one” I intend to do these in channeled message format so it’ll be a message that sounds as though I’m speaking directly to you. In life we have plenty of soulmates, plenty of karmics, some of us have a twin flame even as well. But whomever, you’re intended to end up with long term and indefinitely is who I’ll be channeling in energy today. My prayer for those of you who are choosing to receive this message is that it reaches those who are only in alignment with the prospect of love and divinely ordained connections and are willing to manifest happiness and abundance for themselves through action and growth. Our hearts are big enough to share and open up to many but I pray that those whom you choose to share your hearts with and those whom approach you with the prospect of sharing theirs are in true alignment with you and will treat you only with upmost tenderness and care. Bless. 💙

*purples and blues are significant once again, also fish. 🎣 lol wtv that means..*

***

“I know that things have been hard for you, you may feel somewhat hopeless about your romantic relationships and about love. You may have entered this lifetime with strong feelings and a deep pull to romantic love and connections, you want to focus on someone, you want to love and be loved, you want for others to do for you what you so effortlessly do for them. I am all the same I promise. You feel as though what you’re looking for may not truly exist, you feel as through you’ve been hurt or mistreated so much that you have a responsibility to settle in order to be happy or that the people you find yourself attached to or loving deeply are the end be all for you and if they were to go that you’d be alone eternally. That’s just not true.

Hardship and the battle forward is rewarded with good things my love. Don’t be stubborn, don’t bury yourself deep into the ground and refuse to move, do not take root where you do not belong, where you do not belong does not have the nutrients to allow you to grow as I will. Where you do not belong will weaken your roots, will eat away at you, will tie you down and tangle you up in order to keep you from growing towards the sky. Do not allow the negative behaviors and actions of others interfere with the purity of your heart. To strive for better means only to remain strong and authentic in times of crisis.

To me, your divinity shines up towards the heavens like a beacon of hope and you are everything I have been looking for and praying for. I watch you. I study you. I hang on to your every word. You are home to me while several aspects of my spirit lain and remain frequent in movement. When I come to you, I’d have found myself but there is more that I will discover about what I need and what I truly desire out of this lifetime through you. You are so special, so divine, you are the single closest thing to the heavens. I will support you. Those who speak ill of you will be silenced. I will protect you. When one finds an angel, they are tasked with the responsibility of creating heaven for them and that is exactly what I’ll do.

In the now, I remain in the process of coming into alignment with myself, seeking out my own divinity as you seem to effortlessly have, I love you because you make me a better individual, you bring solace for my spirit after a long while having none, you pour into me light you’ve sourced from only the most authentic of places. Your growth means mine so please carry on, focus on what it means to find enlightenment and fulfillment in your own life and in your own reality, build things for yourself, create, find peace where you don’t have it by removing what disrupts it. I know that you love to talk and I will love to listen to you, we will stay up for hours having conversations and connecting with one another, I value your love for communication and your ability to speak and write so effortlessly about a variety of things, you bring with you wisdom wherever you go, your mind is a god given one.

I know god, I know faith, but I will not see it in all of its glory and essence until I meet you. You are the physical embodiment of divinity, of love, of spirituality, of power. Please do not be hurt by the way things have revealed themselves to be in your life and in love, move with grace, offer yourself forgiveness for not seeing the worst in others right away because it is not within your heart to do so. Acceptance is the key to inner peace, we must accept things as they are. I will tell you plenty that there is no peace nor purpose in trying to change things that are beyond our control or have already taken the form of which they already are. With me you’ll learn balance, with me you’ll learn what it means to be fluid, to be malleable and flexible. In more ways than one..

I bring and offer to you support and balance where you do not have it. De-center your romantic relationships at this time. De-center the prospect of searching for love or a divine counterpart. Laugh. Enjoy your life, have fun, love yourself, love the things you create, love the human experience. Seek out love and solace in every where but others whom you have to trudge through deep waters in order to find. I am with you in spirit. Look deep into your heart and you will find all my love and support.”

***

ii.

“I want only to create beautiful things with you my love, to create prosperity in our lives, to build homes wherever we go, to have children with you, to make love and love one another equally. But, before we can do that, there is something i need to let go of. Change is difficult, I know it to be true but we can only receive what we rightfully deserve when we open ourselves up to receiving it, we can only recover from what we will allow yourselves to release. I have so much to say to you but I can’t put into words all I want to say just yet but I am trying, I am growing. Where change comes and attempts to pull you away from wherever youve held yourself against your spirits true desires and wishes is where change threatens to pull me from as well.

My heart is heavy, I have many blockages to work through. I am afraid, and my past, my upbringing and my karmic cycles threaten always to pull me into the trap of continuing to live and love through generational curses, to fall into toxic cycles of repetition, or to continue not perpetuate cycles of abuse or bad habits. I feel restless all the time and my problem at this time, in this day and age is not feeling as though I have the capacity or strength to do the inner work to break heavy generational burdens that have been inherited to me.

I fought to be here, my spirit is weary, in my past life I lived a life or hardship, and in this one I bring with me heavy things, I said to God that I would come back and try again, but consciously, in my human mind, I don’t remember, I do not know the source of my trauma and my hardship in full. I feel as though on my journey into this world I was sent plummeting into the abyss. I feel the way the Morningstar felt when god cast him out. I feel your resistance, you do not want to speak with me or you do not want to hear from me. But I fought to be here. To be within this plain of existence and to come through this message to connect with you.

I do not blame you for the way that you feel, I know that I do not have the capacity at this time to give you everything you need and deserve and so as punishment for my behavior you’ve taken your heart away from me and given it to someone else or have locked it away elsewhere out of my reach. I understand. If you choose to part from me till the end of this lifetime and into the next I do not blame you and I will not be angry. I will live with regret. You no longer romanticize hardship, you have healed, you have outgrown me for my purpose within our past and I respect that, I respect your decision, I respect you. What I want most out of this life is to heal, to come into alignment with myself and to be with you, what you want is to be loved wholly and beyond fears and ego and for a very long time I could not do that for you and so you took yourself elsewhere. You are brave and you are strong. You represent what it means to be in love with yourself, to be in alignment, to be love, to grow, to prosper.

I will transform, I will make the changes necessary for myself like you asked me too. You told me once, that you wished for me self love and peace and I will find it. With or without you as you did in your life. I will reap the reward of healing and of growth and of freedom from karmic cycles and generational trauma. I will be strong and I will be brave just as you told me to be. I will take from the strength you poured into me that I stored away due to me not knowing how to use it in the past. I’m going to let go of all of these horrible things, I’m going to server my attatchment to my trauma. See? Now you are calm. You don’t scowl at me or frown, you’re calm and beautiful as you exist in my memory. I’m your twin flame. I am apart of you. The qualities that you dislike within me are qualities you dislike within yourself. We are one. You may have moved on from me, you may have grown, you may be in the process of creating things for yourself in your life, settling into commitments, loving yourself and loving others but I’ll be with you. In spirit.”

***

iii.

“The two of us haven’t yet met but I believe that I will find you one day when we’re ready to meet one another. I’ve made a lot of mistakes, I’m sure we both have in our lives. I know that you’re waiting for me and I know that at times you feel restless or exhausted or you may even feel lonely or frustrated due to the fact that you haven’t met someone who is perfectly suited for you as you think you’d observed in other peoples relationships.

Don’t envy others, in there situations there is proof of flaws as well however minimal. We have so much inner work to do and so much growth to embark on, I’ve not come, we’ve not come together because we’re simply not ready and it’s only a matter of time and the choices we choose to make in between time. Don’t wait up for me, don’t center your growth around love, set yourself free, allow your spirit to move through life and gain the gift of the human experience without desired outcomes or predetermined ideas about what will come if you choose to grow, if you choose self love, if you choose to come into alignment with your higher self. I would say all these things to you as a friend before I was in the position to say them to you as a lover.

Your value, your time, your energy, your worth are not attached to who you can become for others or what you could potentially receive for growing or becoming who’ve been meaning to be this entire time. Think about everything that you desire for yourself, consider your freedom and your return from spiritual poverty. Reevaluate what is truly important to you. We can only offer and give to others what he already have for ourselves. It is not your job to go out into the world and fall in love it is your job to fall in love with yourself and all of your divinity and come into true alignment so that I may come to you and offer myself to you in full. I want for you what you want for yourself… happiness, peace, support, safety.. you can hear my voice by now within your spirit, hold onto me. Take root.

Release your anger, release your frustration, do not allow yourself to be easily moved or threatened by others and triggering situations, don’t allow people’s behaviors whether they be negative or be in positive intention push you to be cold and apathetic or negative or rude. To love yourself is to love others. To be patient with yourself is to be patient with others. To forgive yourself is to forgive others. To be emotionally in tune and receptive is to see the truth in situations and make room for all truths. Love is patient, love is kind, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrong doings. Ask yourself, my love, if you are these things you say you want, if you are all these things you say you want love to be, if you are in the energy to receive it. And then, when you are ready and you are able, I will come.

***

thankyou for listening guys, rest or be productive today in ways that matter, you choose. Be calm today, be reflective, be intentional. Show yourself grace and offer it to others. I love you, and I’ll see you another time! Bless! 🎣💜

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another-whump-sideblog · 9 months

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This has probably been done before, but I love the idea of a lab Whumper who is trying so so hard to be ethical. They would absolutely subject themself to any of the procedures they’re subjecting Whumpee to, but they don’t have [whatever trait whumper is studying].

They gave Whumpee the chance to join the study voluntarily, but when they refused, Whumper had to take matters into their own hands. This research will benefit the whole world, Whumpee’s consent and freedom aren’t more important than that… right? Right. They’re doing the right thing.

Whumper puts so much work into making their living conditions as good as possible. Spends time with them to make sure their social needs are being fulfilled, lets them get an hour or more of sunlight almost every day, lets them choose what kinds of clothes they want to wear and what kinds of foods they want to eat. What brand of soap is in the bathroom connected to their cell room.

They’ll turn themself in once all of this is over. They’ve been keeping very detailed records of everything they’ve been doing, including all the crimes. They fully plan on losing their freedom permanently, and it’s a price they’re willing to pay. Their freedom is not worth more than the world, either.

Whumper always explains what’s going to happen in each procedure unless Whumpee asks them not to. They offer pain-killers and sedatives anytime a procedure might be uncomfortable or painful, unless they absolutely need Whumpee to feel it.

They plan out little wins for Whumpee. Ways for them to feel closer to escape, to feel in control. Little hidey-holes in their cell and ‘accidentally’ leaving things where Whumpee can grab them so they feel like they have some things that are theirs. Whumper ‘lets things slip’ about where they are. Whumper ‘decides against’ certain procedures when Whumpee begs or does something clever, and though they never actually planned on doing the procedures in the first place, it keeps Whumpee contented.

They give Whumpee updates on their family when asked. They push down the urge to distance themself, day after day. It’s tempting, to see Whumpee as less than human. It would make this easier on their conscience. But their conscience shouldn’t be eased, and if they’re going to abduct someone the very least they could do is remember always that they are a person and they don’t deserve any of this.

Unfortunately, it’s not about ‘deserve.’ It’s about ‘need,’ and the world needs this research.

#whump #whump prompt #lab whump

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timelessstardust99 · 8 months

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sanji x reader where he’s basically in love with them, he’s always by their side but reader can’t quite understand why someone as handsome as sanji would love someone like them, angsty and fluffy please! i love sanji so so so so much

Sanji's Love | LA! Vinsmoke Sanji x Reader (Spoiler for the Live Action One Piece show)

Summary: In which Y/N doubts that Sanji actually loves them and thinks he was just flirting with them out of pity, because who could fall in love with someone who barely knew how to boil water, much less cook.

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x GN! Reader

Y/N sat on the ram head of the boat, their legs dangling from the ledge as they looked over the ocean that was sloshing around beneath them. They couldn't believe that they were a part of a Pirates crew after years of serving the Baratie, they had always had the dream to be a part of one just like Zeff was before he had lost his leg. Thinking about it now though, they couldn't understand why Luffy had wanted them on his crew. Maybe it had been Sanji's persuasion or the fact that Luffy always felt the need to have them fulfill their dreams whilst they look for the One Piece together. Y/N sighed, pulling their legs up to their chest and resting their head on their knees.

"Y/N, darling, what are you doing all the way up there?" Came the voice of Sanji, the man Y/N had been avoiding since they had become a part of Luffy's crew. The eighteen-year-old looked over the edge of the ram and towards the older blonde who looked up at them with a charming smile which made Y/N blush at one of the pet names the cook seemed to call them in endearment.

"Uh, thinking." Y/N admitted, smiling shyly at the nicely dressed man who walked a little more to the ram head so he could climb up there with them, though it seemed to be hard for him to climb with pants as tight as his. Y/N's thoughts seemed to disappear as they watched Sanji try to climb up the ram head, which caused the younger of the two to giggle at him. Sanji thought it was music to his ears. "Do you need help hun?" They asked him, watching as the man struggled to hang onto the statue, with one leg draped over so he could get a good footing.

"No, I've got this," he strained, pulling himself slowly up the ram head and sitting with his back against theirs for a moment as he gasped in breaths, his hair now sticking to his already sweaty forehead.

"No, no, I see you've got it," They nudged him causing Sanji to chuckle and swing his legs around so he was now sitting side to side with the younger teen. Their smile soon turned into a frown again as they looked out to the ocean again, Sanji noticed this and pushed his shoulder against their's.

"What's the matter, love?" He asked them gently. They didn't want to admit it, not anyone, but they felt as if they didn't deserve Sanji's love and appreciation. They didn't look anything like the kind of person Sanji would prefer. They looked at him with a frustrated glint in their eye.

"Why do you love me?" They asked him, his eyes going wide from the sudden question. He didn't think they'd question his love and loyalty, sure he was a big flirt, but he had quit doing that because Y/N was everything he had always wanted in a partner.

"What's brought this on?" He asked, his hand going against their back as a way to comfort them.

"I just... I just can't understand why you'd want me when there are so many more people out there and you picked me? Why? I'm a nobody, even when I worked at Baratie." They said, looking at him with frantic eyes. He stared at them in shock.

"Dear, there is no one on this planet besides you that I want," He said gently to them.

"Really?" They doubted, their overthinking nature always seemed to win. He smiled at them, bringing his face closer to theirs and giving them a kiss on the forehead, which caused them to close their eyes. He pulled back from them, looking at their content face.

"Really," he said, "is that also why you were avoiding me after we left Zeff?" He asked after a moment. They sighed, laying their head on his shoulder with shame.

"Yeah, I just couldn't bring myself to look at you with all of these thoughts, I felt like I was holding you back." They admitted to him.

"You can never hold me back dear," He said, wrapping an arm around their shoulders and hugging them close as he kissed their temple. In the silence of the air, Y/N was finally feeling like they were meant to be here, with this man and their crew.

EDIT: Sorry, had to edit a couple of parts, it was only a small part.

#live action sanji #taz skylar #vinsmoke sanji #x reader #gender netural reader #live action one piece #request #fluff and angst #red leg zeff #forehead kisses #fluff

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leoascendente · 3 months

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PAC/ Who's thinking about you? ✨️

Hi my loves! ❤️ Welcome to this new pac about the person who has you currently on their mind. As always, take only what resonates with you and leave what doesn't. Take a deep breath before choosing your pile and pick the one that calls you the most, hope you like it :)

My blog in Spanish here

Paid readings here

The pictures are taken from the blog of @simena, my absolute favorite blog, highly recommended<3

Pile 1/Pile 2/ Pile 3

Pile 1:

Who and why?:

(Cards: 3 of wands, 4 of cups rev, 8 of swords rev, death/ ace of pentacles, 7 of swords rev, 4 of pentacles, hermit rev)

I feel a friendship vibe from this pile, this is a person that you thought would be in your life for a really long time, you felt really happy and fulfilled by this person's side, everything seemed to be fie but something happened that you lost contact with eachother, for some I see you had to consciously pull them off your life because they were becoming a toxic influence. Even though you had future plans with this person, maybe a travel or something like that, you decided to leave them behind or the relationship ended before aything bad could happen to you. I feel this was a friendship of yours who was troublesome but you didn't realize of their true colors until it was late, I see here that you really loved and appreciate them deeply and their actions after the separation dissapointed you, like the kind of people that talks bad at your back so they look nicer to the eyes of others.

This person feared that you could find out some truths about them that they wanted to keep hidden, I'm also hearing 'copycat' energy so this person was trying to make theirs your ideas or projects, this person lacks originality and have to absorv it from others like a parasite, even if sounds bad. I really feel that the person who decided to cut off this relationship was you in order to protect yourself and your wellbeing, it might sound weird but it seems like everything was fine on the outside but there was a perceptible tension in the air that you were avoiding or not giving the proper importance to. They are thinking about you because you were a lighthouse for them, their life was better when you were on it and they know it.

Future actions:

(Cards: queen of wands rev, wheel of fortune rev, page of swords, queen of swords)

This person will try to enter your life again, expect a suddent text message or call from them, it has taken them a lot of effort to do it and I even see the have written you before but never sent the message. I take the queen of swords as an advice for you to act more strategicaly and, if you feel like responding the message or call, do it in a cold way because they are coming from a place of interest not love, and might even try to force an argument to prove you wrong. This person is projecting a lot of things over you because they feel small, even more if this separation between you two happened a long time ago, this person feels frustrated about the fact that you could move on and they don't, they might even be jealous of how your life is currently going and the blessings you are receiving. Things look to be moving against this person and they saw you as their lucky charm, now that they don't know how to get out of the circumstances they created, they are coming back into your life for you to save them. Be intelligent my dear, don't let them manipulate you because those are their intentions, play smart.

Pile 2

Who and why?:

(Cards: 7 of wands, hanged man, 3 of swords rev, 10 of pentacles/ knight of swords rev, 5 of wands, 5 of cups rev, empress rev)

Gosh, this person is intense as hell, the kind of person that always has their guard up because thinks that the whole world is against them, always on fight or flight mode. You had a fight or argument with this person that led to break the relationship, this person might be a pisces sun or moon, this person is really defensive and rarely take things lightly, it feels like living in survival mode, it could be a family member for what I'm feeling. For a little amount of you I see that this person could be a love interest that kept you moving back and forth but never commiting to you, they used you for their own interest and avoiding facing the truth of their behavior, this person, whoever it is, is really conflictive within themselves and with the world, they don't know how to keep and care the relationships in their life. If you resonate with the love interest option, this person might be dealing with someone that will treat them the same way they treated you, they are about to receive a heavy karmic lesson.

This person was a little jealous of you, and instead of being ispired by your energy they saw you as a threat even though it was never your intention to make them feel that way. I see that this person holds so much anger and rage within that they need to create any excuse to start an argument so they can release those emotions in a toxic way with people that don't really deserve it. You know that kind of people that get yelled at on their work by their boss and act submissive but when they arrive home they start yelling at everyone the way they wish they yelled at their boss? Well, that's the kind of vibe I'm getting from this person. They think of you from time to time but when you appear in their mind they try hard to pull you away from their thoughts, they have remorse and they know why, they are just avoiding reality and the consequences of their own actions.

Future actions:

(Cards: 4 of pentacles, tower rev, 10 of swords rev, 6 of cups)

This person really misses you, with two 10 cards in their spread I feel like they have solved some issues that were a trouble in your relationship when you were dealing with eachother, right now they feel more positive but they still have this melancholic energy when it comes to you because they know that they could end up things in a more positive light, . They are not going to approach you, their pride is too big for that but, they think about you pretty often and, when they do, they feel remorse and guilt, they know that you were a good influence for them and are aware that their behavior was a burden that caused all the disaster. Anyway, this person thinks that you made them really happy and miss those joyful moments, they know you are a good person and recognie all the good things you made for them, they might be even looking for you in other people because I keep hearing on repeat on my mind the song Glimpse of us (beautiful song but with a very toxic message, it's singed by joji, in case you want to check it)

Pile 3:

Who and why?:

(Cards: star rev, 7 of cups rev, page of wands, strenght rev/ justice, judgement, 4 of swords, page of swords)

This might be a love interest that ghosted you and, for what it seems, for no reason, but in fact they really had serious reasons to pull you away, it might not be ghosting per se but right now there's no contact between you two for any given reason, like things just got cold. This person had a lot of unsolved bussinesses in their life that they needed to be attended by the moment they met you, this person might look very outgoing and resolutive on the outside but there's a deep anxiety they are trying very hard to hide, they might even be using sports as an scape mechanism to stop thinking about everything that's currently on their table. There's a lot of attraction between both of you and this person feels it very intensely, you left a significative mark on them and they can't forget about you, and in fact, they don't want to forget you at all but now they don't feel enough for you, or at least, like they can't offer you what you deserve.

The why is a little more complex than what I expected, for some there could be legal matters involved that they had to solve, maybe this is some kind of forbidden relationship and this person was in the middle of a divorce, whatever it is, law is involved here, for those who don't, they are going through a serious karmic lesson. This person has you on high regard and wants to offer you something real and stable but they know that the circumstances weren't the right ones, they want to present themselves as the perfect match for you and, instead of being honest and tell you about what's going on in their life they decided to let things at pause waiting for the perfect moment to come back.

Future actions:

(Cards: 3 of swords rev, high priestess, hierophant, knight of cups)

This person is coming back into your life with their heart on their hands ready to give it to you, they see you as their counterpart and they regret deeply for not acting correctly with you. Now that their problems are solved they want to come back but they have this fear of you having the door closed for them, I see they have an apology and an explanation for you but they are scared that you might reject them for their behavior. They've been thinking a lot about you and you have probably thought a lot about them too, even have some psychic glimpses of this person like dreams or intuitive toughts. Expect soon a contact from this person, they won't take too long. There's a soulmate/ twin flame connection between you two, and even if this person don't know about this kind of connections they know that there's something special here and that your connection and chemistry is true.

#witchblr #leoascendente #tarot #divination witch #tarotblr #pac reading #pick a pile #tarot reading #pick a picture #tarot spread #tarotcommunity

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