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arguablysomaya · 8 months

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Tim (about Kon): I can fix him.

Cassie: You are literally worse.

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batfamilycannons · 2 months

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Bruce *storming in, burnt and covered in ash*: Where is your brother?

Damian and Tim: tf??

Tim: uh I think Jason’s in the library?

Bruce: no not him the other one

Dick, *scurries past the door*

Bruce: RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON why did you set my bed on fire

Dick: You deserve it!!

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vivianthepigeon · 6 months

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Tim: “I need to tell you something”

Bruce: “What did you do??”

Tim: “when Alfred was doing our taxes he noticed a missing check”

Bruce: “what did you do???”

Tim: “Before I answer do you trust me enough to understand that it was for a good reason and just leave it at that?”

Bruce: “What. Did. You. Do.”

Tim: “it’s all Jason’s fault! He is a BAD person, I’ve been telling you for years!”

—————

Bruce to Jason: “WHAT DID YOU DO?”

Jason: “okay now before I answer that-“

Bruce: “just tell me whatcha did”

Jason: “I got a DUI”

Bruce: “Jason!”

Jason: “it’s not as bad as it sounds”

Bruce: “How is driving drunk not bad???”

Jason: “I wasn’t exactly driving”

Bruce: “I don’t follow.”

Jason: “I was at the bar with Damian and I had a few”

Bruce: “DAMIAN?!”

—————

Damian: “With God as my witness I’ve never been to that bar in my life.”

Jason: “He knows.”

Damian: “Oh I’ve been there a bunch”

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sodamnbored · 19 days

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Damian, entering the living room: Oh, Drake. I didn’t realise you were here too.

Tim, distracted on his phone on the couch: Yeah, best WiFi around. Keeping busy?

Damian, looking in cupboards and chandeliers for acrobatic older brothers: Looking for Dick.

Tim absently, not looking up from Grindr: Mm, me too.

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iwannabealice · 2 months

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clark: i met this boy last night that seemed to really hate you

bruce: that could be anyone, what did he look like?

clark: tall, white, dark hair, really big-

bruce: ah, that’d be jason. my son

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dickgraysonmybeloved · 3 months

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Jason, eating cereal: Ah, Hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this. Tim, who walked out of his bedroom in his house into his kitchen: Maybe we would, if you would sTOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE!!!

#jason todd #tim drake #dc #dc comics #dcu #dc universe #incorrect quote gen #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect quotes #incorrect batman quotes

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fleur-dans-la-nuit · 2 months

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Jason, to Bruce: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside

Dick, smirking: Yeah, now that you mentioned it, I noticed that too

Bruce: …

Bruce: I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...

Tim: *Loudly sips tea from a bowl*

#incorrect quotes #dc incorrect quotes #dc universe #dc robin #jason todd #dick grayson #bruce wayne #batman #tim drake #bat brothers #bat boys #batfam #bat family #bat fam #dcu

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rad-batson · 11 months

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The BatKids and Their Most Viral Tweets :D

Guess who just got their degree last week (me, besties woohoo)

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i-am-traveling-the-multifandom · 5 months

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Nightwing: "I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate, or malewife our way out of it this time." Red Hood, cracks his knuckles: "Manslaughter it is."

#red hood #nightwing #incorrect quotes #jason todd #richard grayson #dick grayson #dc universe #batfam

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cablecar-s · 6 days

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Jason and Tim fighting about something

Jason: Yeah? Well YOU'RE adopted!

Tim more or less about to lose his shit: We're ALL ADOPTED

Damian in the background about to speak up

Tim: You're not a part of this

Damian: >:[

#would this be considered incorrect quotes?#idk whatever #incorrect quotes #jason todd #damian wayne #batfamily #tim drake #dc universe #red hood #red robin #robin

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kimjun · 9 days

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YN: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?

Jason: What?

Yn: I wanna be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.

Jason: Can we go back to the part where you said "when I get murdered"?

#reader insert #x reader #incorrect quotes #dc x y/n #jason todd x reader #dcu #jason x reader #dc batman #dc robin #dc comics #dc universe #jason todd #batman #batfam x reader #batfamily #incorrect dc quotes #dc x reader #red hood x reader #jason todd is red hood

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arguablysomaya · 9 months

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Tim: Why do I always let you two talk me into things like this?

Kon: This was literally your idea!

Bart: You made charts.

Kon: And diagrams.

Bart: And code names-

Tim: YES ALRIGHT FINE. FUCK.

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batfamilycannons · 4 months

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Dick*the eldest daughter reaching a breaking point and it was this or manslaughter*: Due to my emotional trauma, I have decided I will be reverting back to my childhood Goblin lifestyle

Jason*always one for chaos*: Good for you

Bruce*traumatized from the first time not sure if he can survive a pt.2*: oh no

Tim*never left his Menace Lifestyle and is very exited to help cause more problems*: yay!

Bruce*even more scared*: oh no

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issdisgrace · 11 months

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Y/n: Hey Dick, how old is your dad?

Dick: What?

Y/n: No, not like that. Well, it is. It is like that. How old is he? I come in the house, he was like "You wanna eat?" I said "Eat what?"

Dick: First of all, put my plate down and stop hitting on my dad!

Y/n: Don't get mad at me! I didn't even wanna be here! Y'all the ones that wanted to be here! I wanted to go to the strip club! Man, wrap this up. I got a bunch of ones and somebody gonna get 'em. Mr. Wayne, I'm ready for the rest of the tour!

#dick grayson #nightwing #dick grayson x male reader #nightwing x male reader #dick grayson x reader #nightwing x reader #bruce wayne #batman #bruce wayne x male reader #batman x male reader #bruce wayne x reader #batman x reader #dc #dc comic #dc universe #ryans incorrect quotes

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incorrectbatfam · 2 months

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So I’ve been binging a lot of paranormal/past lives documentaries recently, and I’d like to hear your opinion on what unsettling things the batkids have said to Bruce in a universe where he had all of them as tinies

Baby Dick: Tati, I made a friend today!

Bruce: How nice. What's their name?

Dick: His name is Wally and he runs super fast. Like super duper.

Bruce, chuckling: You should bring him over sometime.

Dick: But he's right behind you.

———————

Baby Cass: *staring out the window*

Bruce: What'cha looking at?

Cass, whispering: He's back.

———————

Baby Damian: Baba, you have teeth.

Bruce: Indeed I do.

Damian: For now.

———————

Baby Tim: Dad, can I sleep here?

Bruce: Of course, buddy. What's wrong, did you have a nightmare?

Tim: They're in my room again.

Bruce: Who?

Tim: The mountain people. They're here for my insides.

———————

Bruce: *washing strawberries*

Baby Steph: Strawberries are red!

Bruce: Yep.

Steph: Just like my blood when it escapes my skin.

———————

Bruce: *tucks Jason in*

Baby Jason: Goodbye, Pops.

Bruce: It's goodnight, not goodbye, remember?

Jason: Not this time.

———————

Bruce: Hey Barbara, aren't you hungry?

Baby Barbara: *shakes her head*

Barbara: I have a tummyache here.

Barbara: *points to where the Joker would've shot her*

———————

Baby Duke: *standing in a dark room*

Bruce: Hey Duke, what are you doing in there?

Duke: The shadows called me.

Bruce, tired of all this: Well now I'm calling you. Dinner's ready.

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iwannabealice · 2 months

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part 4

#dc universe #dc comics #dc batfam #dc outlaws #dc incorrect quotes #dc red hood #dc arsenal #dc jason todd #dc roy harper #jason todd #roy harper #red hood #arsenal #red hood and the outlaws #jayroy #batfamily #batfam #batfam incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes

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