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vivianthepigeon · 6 months

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Tim: “I need to tell you something”

Bruce: “What did you do??”

Tim: “when Alfred was doing our taxes he noticed a missing check”

Bruce: “what did you do???”

Tim: “Before I answer do you trust me enough to understand that it was for a good reason and just leave it at that?”

Bruce: “What. Did. You. Do.”

Tim: “it’s all Jason’s fault! He is a BAD person, I’ve been telling you for years!”

—————

Bruce to Jason: “WHAT DID YOU DO?”

Jason: “okay now before I answer that-“

Bruce: “just tell me whatcha did”

Jason: “I got a DUI”

Bruce: “Jason!”

Jason: “it’s not as bad as it sounds”

Bruce: “How is driving drunk not bad???”

Jason: “I wasn’t exactly driving”

Bruce: “I don’t follow.”

Jason: “I was at the bar with Damian and I had a few”

Bruce: “DAMIAN?!”

—————

Damian: “With God as my witness I’ve never been to that bar in my life.”

Jason: “He knows.”

Damian: “Oh I’ve been there a bunch”

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sideeve · 6 months

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arkham knight!jason who watched you for months before the cloudburst. you catch his attention as he tried to get familiar with Gotham after he left the asylum. maybe it was the way your hips swayed flawlessly as you walked or the way your breasts jiggled. whatever it was made him enamored.

arkham knight!jason who takes you in secretly. he feared that if scarecrow knew about you, you would become his test subject to his fear toxin. he keeps you in his bunker, bringing you the necessities.

you got comfortable with arkham knight!jason after a while. he even showed you the person under the mask when he was sure you weren’t a threat. on calm night, he’d strip down into nothing but his boxers, cuddling you as he stroked your hair whispering apologies for taking you.

arkham knight!jason was quick to fuck you through his mattress. your face was pushed into the pillow as his large hands held your hips up, helping him hit your spot at a better angle.

arkham knight!jason who fucked you so good you didn’t even think about leaving him. his cock hit your sensitive walls too beautifully for you to threaten him of escaping. his tongue was too skilled for you to even utter the words for leaving him. he made sure of it.

taglist ;; @worldsgreatestsinner

#jason todd smut #jason todd x reader #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd fic #arkham knight x reader #arkham knight fanfic #arkham knight fanfiction #arkham knight #dc fanon #dc fanfiction #dc x reader

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incorrectbatfam · 1 month

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What tricks do the pets know?

Ace:

Operate the Batcomputer

Alert Bruce to possible threats

Microwave his own kibble

Speak multiple canine languages

Drag Bruce to bed

Do a headcount of the batfam before they go out

Use Bruce's credit card to buy chew toys

Titus:

Greet Damian

Secret handshake with Damian

Pose for Damian's drawings

Hug Damian

Comfort Damian

Retrieve lost batarangs for Damian

Put Robin costume in laundry for Damian

Guard Damian from the people in the TV

Reach tall shelves for Damian

Love Damian unconditionally

Alfred the cat:

Curl up around a tennis ball

Admire his reflection

Gaslight

Walk all over the dinner table

Bat-Cow:

Sit like a French girl

Do her 10-step skincare routine

Order a 4-course meal from Moober Eats

Unlatch the barn door

Book the private jet

Have a hot girl summer at the Running of the Bulls

Get caught in a love triangle between a bison and a buffalo

Spark an international conflict

Retreat to a Himalayan yak sanctuary on a journey of self-discovery

Meet a dashing steer only to realize they could never work out

Return home and put the plane back before anyone notices

Ghostwrite the next Nicholas Sparks novel

Goliath:

Sleep 20 hours a day

Breathe manually

Bite rocks

Jerry:

Be gay

Fall in love with plastic lawn flamingos

Attack the same flamingos

Peck people indiscriminately

Evade baths

Wiggles:

Ignore commands

Arson

Haley:

Shed all over the furniture

Run away from the vacuum

Weaponize puppy dog eyes

Convince Ace and Titus to share their treats

Clean out an entire jar of peanut butter in the time Dick takes to answer a phone call

Isis:

Bring rare birds to Selina

Leave scathing comments on dog videos

Cough up hairballs on demand

Blair Witch it in the corner of the room

Be bisexual

Eat hot chips

Lie

Dog:

Bark at nothing

Eat dirt

Play hide-and-seek with Jason's guns

Run into glass doors

Occasionally poop outside

Refuse to respond to her name

Chew her own tail

Meow for some reason

Moldy:

Help scientists discover new species of fungi

Induce vivid hallucinations

Cultivate an industrial society

BONUS – Krypto:

Chase airplanes

Aim for a fire hydrant from 50 feet up

Mark typos in Clark and Lois's drafts

Babysit Jon

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mothmoth0 · 5 months

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I Made this panels inspired un Jorge Jiménez art for practice

#dc comics #dcu #dc universe #nightwing #nightwing art #dick grayson #richard grayson #tim drake #robin #red robin #selina kyle #catwoman #dc fandome #dc fanon

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sleepisoverrated · 2 months

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My headcanons about Dick Grayson

Dick Grayson is smart.

Like I hate it when they make him a dumb bimbo, he's hot yes he knows it, but he also has been hacking into the Pentagon for fun since he was ten, survived Spyral and several almost apocalypses. I know it's cannon since no Bat is dumb, but some fics, SOME FICS, make him look like he never went to school.

Dick Grayson knows so many languages.

I assume due to the fact that he grew up in a traveling circus he already knew a lot of languages(even if his english was bad when his parents died), but due to being robin and Bruce Wayne's ward he learned basically all major languages on Earth( and some alien) like Romani, German, French, Russian, English, Italian, Greek, Spanish, Irish, Finish, Japanese, Mandarin, Cantonese, Indian, Latin, backwards speech(Zatara), Tamoranian(i think that's how you spell it), Kryptonian, speedster(when speedsters talk super fast) and so on.

Dick Grayson has at least some immunity against Fear toxin(Ft), Joker venom(Jv).

And most of the other poisons due to constant exposure since he was 9, also when he was younger there were no antidotes for Ft and Jv so he learned how to ride them out without a sound. (You can't tell me it hasn't fucked him up somehow, like a 9 y/o being constantly exposed to these things HAS to have some consequences and while he has his immunity I also think he has extreme anxiety( like all the bats a.k.a. Bat paranoia) and constant panic attacks(next headcanon))

Dick Grayson is a master at controlling his body.

Besides the fact that he probably learned acrobatics before he could walk and was a stage performer(always smiled even if the performance got off the rails) I also think he has taught himself complete control of his body due to far too many close calls. He learned to control each muscle individually for combat under high-stress situations(where he most needs that control). This had a side effect of him being able to control his face muscle/expressions and body language. He became the best actor there will ever be, because he can keep a smile on his face even if he is in excruciating pain, he can look completely calm and relaxed even though he is having a panic attack and the opposite is true as well he can look completely terrified even though he is amused. Because of this you need to know him extremely well to tell if he's in distress(the only people so far are Alfred, Damian and Slade(he's obsessed))

Anyway if you want more of the headcanon's just say, Nightwing is one of my favourite characters I can rant about him much longer.

#dick grayson #batman #nightwing #robin #dc headcanon #nightwing headcanon #dc fandome #dcu #dc comics #dc universe #dc fanon

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moontearzss · 2 months

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Slutty cropped jacket Jason is my kryptonite :,)

It’s kinda messy cuz I was really tired of it and wanted to finish it asap — that belt thingy is my biggest enemy aggh (also didn’t finish the hands so I just cropped them out💀👍)

Also I am convinced Jason would listen to genesis

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phoenixinthefiles · 2 months

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Fic pet peeve:

“Damien” instead of “Damian”

I just can’t do it, if a fic uses “e” instead of “a” I’m immediately backing out

The “e” just seems so…prissy and boring and annoying

And Damian Wayne is annoying and a little prissy but never BORING

“Damien” sounds like some random trust fund baby that goes to private school and does trust fund baby things- I don’t know

But “Damian” has some DEPTH to it

A over e guys

#I before e except after c #phoe bobbles #damian wayne #robin damian #batfamily #batfam #dc fanon

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milk-artwork · 3 months

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Made this a while back but forgot to post it 💚💙

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audhd-nightwing · 2 months

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fanon stuff about tim drake that is NOT canon:

- tim never stalks batman and robin around Gotham taking photos, he just follows them in the news and collects articles (technically ig you could say he cyberstalks them? but it’s mostly newspapers)

- tim’s robin is NOT jason, it’s dick. even before robin, tim has been a dick grayson fanboy. they met at the circus and tim got a photo with dick before his performance. tim recognizes dick as robin bc of a special move only him and his parents could do (quadruple flip) and from there is able to figure out batman’s identity

- he does not have a caffeine addiction (not even really sure where that came from tbh)

feel free to comment and add more stuff, i might do this for other batfam members too but tim seems to be the most fanonized yk?

#tim drake #timothy drake #timothy jackson drake #tim drake wayne #timothy drake wayne #dc comics #dc canon #dc fanon #canon vs fanon #fanon tim drake #batman comics #dcu #dc universe

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starpunz · 3 months

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I cannot stop vomiting

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weewoow-20706030 · 5 months

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Tim would sometimes Sometimes wish that he would die after he had an argument with his parents.

He would just wonder if they would feel bad. If they would live the rest of their lives knowing that the last thing they said to him was something horrible before leaving silently the next day. Not even saying goodbye to him one last time.

A small, petty, snarling part of him wished it. Wished that they would feel the way they made him feel his whole childhood- like no matter what they do they could never fix what happened.

#tim drake #batfam #dc #red robin #batfamily #lmao #dc fanon #obviously #just dont come for me abt 'its not canon'

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vivianthepigeon · 6 months

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Bruce and his batbrats

Edit: fanon Bruce

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sideeve · 10 months

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NOTHING’S GONNA HURT YOU BABY with Jason Todd

even as the arkham knight , he would never let anything bad happened to you

arkham knight x f!batgirl!reader/jason todd x f!batgirl!reader

based off of the game “arkham knight” and the dlc “a matter of family” , angst , bruce is your father ( adopted or not ) , reader and jason are in love but are not together , jason pretty much kidpnapping the reader , reader’s race or looks aren’t specified , lovers reunited trope

“breaking news! commissioner gordon has been captured by the joker.”

bruce has called you to the batcave, informing you about the upcoming mission he is sending you on. “well why can’t you do it?” jason questions, following behind you. “because, jason, joker specifically said that if i attempted at saving the commissioner, he will die. i can’t risk it.”

jason groans. “it’s okay, jason. i’ll be back soon. with gordon alive.” you attempt at cheering him up. “but…i don’t like you going alone.” you smirk at him pouting. you began to promise him, “i know. after this, we’ll go on every mission together.”

while on your way to the abandoned amusement park, jason always chimed in, checking on you. “i’m at the park.” jason hums, “why are you being quiet all of a sudden?” he doesn’t answer.

you grew nervous, you have never been on a mission with back up. “fuck.” you whispered under you breath. there was a thug rounding next to you, inching close to you. “don’t worry, [ name ]. you got this.” he spoke in your com.

little did you know that jason was perched right on your location, watching you. “how can you be so sure?” he took this as a moment to help you. “well for one, robins are good luck.” he smirks at you.

it’s been three years since you stepped down from the title as batgirl. you couldn’t stand to fight crime without your best friend by your side.

bruce accepted your choice, even though he has told you to never step down from a fight. but he understood your reasoning. he missed jason too.

but you didn’t leave bruce all together. you still helped him. just behind a screen.

“[ name ]! lock the clock tower now!” bruce screams at you. “what are you talking about? no one knows i’m here.” you laugh off his urgency.

the elevator door sounds, catching you attention. before you could see the person, a smoke bomb explodes, covering the room. “go! go! go!”

you couldn’t see anything. you felt a hand grab your arm. you tried to fight them off, but they were too strong.

“let go of me!” your cries were muffled by a gloved hand. “shh, i’ve got you. nothing is going to hurt you. now that i’m here.”

you felt a needle poke you, inserting a liquid in your arm, making you drowsy.

you woke up in an unfamiliar room. the bed was soft. the room had a good temperature. it was like…your home. but it wasn’t.

“you’re awake. finally.” the booming voice makes you jump. “i didn’t mean to scare you. really, the plan wasn’t to scare you at all. but, you were acting terrible. and i couldn’t do anything else.”

he laughs humorlessly. “what-who are you?” your voice quivers. “you really don’t know, do you, [ name ]?” he clicks a button, his mask lifting, exposing his face.

“oh my god…” you felt your heart jump out of your chest. “i thought you were dead. joker sent the video and everything. bruce and i didn’t stop looking for you. how are you…”

“i know. it’s a lot to explain. but i’m back.” you run up to hug him. “don’t you ever leave me again, asshole.” he laugh, “not planning on it.”

#jason todd x reader #jason todd #jason todd angst #jason todd fluff #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd fic #dc fanon #dc fanfiction #arkham knight x reader #arkham knight #arkham knight fanfiction #arkham knight fanfic

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incorrectbatfam · 9 months

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thevoidisscreamingbackatyou · 1 year

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ok guys

gonna preface: i dont have knowledge of any canon at the moment so yeah this would probably not fit with any of it

but tim, bernard, and kon just forgetting to tell anyone that theyre dating.

and then the media catches tim on a date with bernard first, then kon- but the three put themselves on a social media ban for the first three weeks because they thought theyd told people fjanfksm

and then everyone thinks tim is cheating on both of em??

AND THEN KON AND BERNARD GO ON A DATE

instead of a love triangle, its a cheating triangle gnsnfns

and the families dont know either so do with that what you will

idk i just feel like itd be funny though unlikely in any way

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sleepisoverrated · 23 days

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Hey here's some songs that I think match (, but keep in mind I was reading Angst fics when collecting the songs)

Jason- Mad Hatter Malanie Martinez, Control Halsey, I'm gonna show you crazy Bebe Rexha, Ain't No Rest For The Wicked Cage The Elephant, House Of Memories Panic!At the Disco, I'm Just Your Problem Adventure Time(Bruce), War and Apologize by grandson, Wonderland Caravan Palace and Boy in the Bubble Alec Benjamin

Dick- Sarcasm Get Scared, Favourite color is Blue Robert DeLong, SAD Young Rising Sons, Novocaine and Last of the Real ones by Fall out boy, Lonely Palaye Royale, Wolf in Sheeps Clothing Set it of(id crisis), Shit Bo Burnham(depressed),Burn the House Down AJR, Teeth 5 seconds of summer(SlaDick), Lotta True Crime Penelope Scott(rape, dark), Best Friends grandson, Wake me up and Hey Brother by Avicii, Medicine Artist vs Poet and Victorious Panic! At the Disco

Damian- Bones Imagine Dragons(Robin is magic), If I Killed someone for you Alec Benjamin, parents YUNGBLUD(his perspective/scared of saying he's gay), Love Like You and Here comes a thought Steven Universe,and Immortals Fall out boy(mini SuperBat)

Tim- I'll Sleep when I'm dead Set it off, Crazy=Genius Panic!At the Disco and Two Birds Regina Spektor

Bruce- Teenagers and Welcome to the Black parade by MCR and Wilson(Expensive mistakes) Fall out Boy

There are less songs for Tim and Bruce because I don't know their lore that well or don't listen to music that matches them.

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