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natsukitakama · 4 years

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It me. Hello. 😱 ~ 🐥 anon may i have.... 👉👈 Headcanons of Reader that is always really patient and caring with the members of levi squad meeting floch. And at first she’s aggressive towards him because he insulted Armin and she’s just trying to protect her babs. But later on growing to be shockingly just as worried about him as everyone else. confusing him when she pats his back and reminds him to drink water before giving a forehead SMOOTCH. Cuz he though she hated him. I wanna love him.

Author note : Hello 🐥 Anon, thank you for you request I’m glad you sent me something about Floch. I’m really sorry for taking so long, I kinda overworked myself. In addition it’s been week since I went back to college so I can’t work on my headcanon as much as I expected to. Anyways, done complaining ! I hope you’ll enjoy this I really wanted to write something good for Floch cause despite what he’s done in the manga I kinda like him !

I do not own that gif credit to the owner

Warning : some spoiler about the beginning of the next season 4 if you haven’t read manga after the anime don’t read this you might be spoil / fluffy / Floch being Floch but that’s okay / angst ? I don't know

Disclaimer : if you’re not comfortable with Floch that’s okay I've got plenty of headcanon on my masterlist I'm sure you’ll find something enjoyable. But please do not be mad at me for writing for Floch or against Anon because they ask a request about him. I won’t tolerate behavior like this.

Masterlist

You first encounter with Floch wasn’t very … calm.

You didn’t mean to slap him right into the face, but when he went into your group talking shit about How you friends Armin should die so Erwin could survive. How he was useless and how humanity was about to fall down. Well you just saw red. It was his own fault, everyone in the 104th knew how protective you were with your friends. So yeah as soon as he was done talking shit, you just walked right in front of him and slap him.

Everyone heard the loud « SLAM » coming from both of us, but they especially remembered the way you looked at him : if eyes could kill he would be dead by now.

« Who do you think you are uh ? You’re nothing but shit on our shoes know your place baby boy »

Then you walked pass him without letting him time to reply. Not like you cared about what he thought.

Who am I kidding of course you cared.

After couple hours, when you weren’t angry anymore you felt guilty. Not because of how you slap him but about the way you talked about him, he was part of your family too so you should treat him properly. That night, you promised yourself to make It up and apologize for your behavior and explain to him that what he said was bad but he didn’t deserve to be slapped especially in public.

That’s what you did, next morning after dressing up you walked looking for Floch. You couldn’t not notice the way his friends’ face went white as soon as you walked into him. Just when he was about to open his mouth you shut him up

« Listen, I’m here to apologize. I shouldn’t slap you that day but to me you deserve this. Everyone here went to hell yesterday and I know you more than everyone else could understand that, that day we lost a lot of peoples including Major. But you shouldn’t say to Armin he should die that day, you more than everyone else should cherish any life. All of them are precious and useful. Still I shouldn’t humiliate you and hurt you so I ask you to forgive me, I can’t justify the way I act. Now be sure to eat enough and drink a lot of water, today is about to be harsh »

Again before Floch could react, you already moved into your friends direction to be sure everyone was eating enough. Floch looked no stared at you hearing you scolding Eren for not eating his bread, then looking at Armin with a smile and for the very first time he felt something wrong, in fact his heart or maybe his chest or his stomach he couldn’t be sure but he felt something twisted right into him. Was he jealous ? Was he envious because you care about everyone else but not him ? No it was stupid he thought.

But during the whole day, he couldn’t help but feel a bit sad. In fact he saw you during the whole day taking care of everyone : From Hanji and their lack of sleep to Mikasa who weren’t eating her breads to be sure Eren would eat enough. Because of his staring he wasn’t focus on his training and he ended up falling from a tree hurting his back in the process.

Before he could even move you were already running into his direction with a worried expression on your face, Floch didn’t know what to say or to do. Why were you worried ? It’s not like you like him or anything. At this point after your scolding he was sure you hated him. But still, he saw you running into him, kneeling down looking for any broken bones, any cut, everything that might be painful for him. Your touch was sweet despite your hands being rough because of all your training, it was as if you were touching him with silk.

« Are you alright ? Can you move ?

W-What ? I mean yes, yes I can move

Good. Now take my hand I’m walking you into the nursery you need to rest

N-No I, I can walk and train i’m fine

Who are you kidding ? You’ve been distant during the whole day you obviously need to rest »

Then you carried him into the nursery as you promised. Floch stay silent during the whole walk, he didn’t know again how to react. Why were you so nice to him ? Did you really notice how distant he was ? How could you possibly know ? He stared at you the whole day, he would notice if you were looking at him. Again, you weren’t supposed to be like this, not after what you said to him. You were supposed to despise him, because after everything you said he still believe that Armin couldn’t be in charge he couldn’t be the major. But you were right about something, he shouldn’t say that because he as Armin was lucky to be here they didn’t deserve to be here. He shouldn’t be here.

He shouldn’t craving for your attention.

He couldn’t prevent it though. Since the day he joined the 104th, he felt something about you. They way you were so caring and yet so strong and confident.

Everything he will never be. Not matter how hard he’ll try.

All he can do was to dedicate his heart.

Dedicate his heart so you could be safe, so you could finally be free from those monsters.

That day, while you were taking care of him, checking his back for any sign or bad injury, cleaning his wounds, pouring a glass of water for him, looking into the kitchen and cooking something so he could heal properly. Floch promised himself that he would be someone who deserves your kindness toward him.

« Still daydreaming ?

What ?

I don’t know, tell me you are pretty quiet since I took you into the nursery. Is something wrong ?

Well I wanted to ask you something but I don’t know if I should

Go ahed I won’t eat you

Very funny. Well I wanted to know why you’re like this ?

Like what ?

You know caring ?

I don’t know. I guess it’s just a part of my personality besides all of you are my family so yeah it seems normal to me to act like this

There’s people who don’t deserve your kindness

Are you perhaps thinking about someone in particular ?

Me actually

Why make you think you don’t deserve my attention ?

Well I actually said to one of your close friends that he should die

Good point. You recognized your mistake right ?

Sure but I still believe the Major should survive that day

You’re not the only one they’re plenty of people who believed he should survive … maybe he should but in the end it’s not up to us to take that decision. We’re soldier, we can’t see the futur we don’t know what would happen.

The major did or at least that’s what I thought

I actually believe he knows shit about everything, he just tried, he was cocky but he succeed that’s what we expected from him. Nothing more nothing less. But in the end, he makes bad decision and he lived with it. I don’t believe he was the only one able to save humanity.

Then who ?

Us. I mean that’s why we’re here right ?

And the major was cocky

*laugh* yeah you’re right I’m probably presumptuous but like I said any on us can’t predict the future all we can do is to work harder so tomorrow would be better

Dedicate our heart

Exactly. Now rest I’ll check on you tonight alright ?

Sure. Thank you Y/N

You don’t need to thank me Floch, but you’re welcome »

Smiling at him, you walked into your friends so you could keep your training.

After your talk with Floch, started to notice that in fact, your kindness had no limit and you were helping anyone ; including him the coward who weren’t able to save the Major or any of his friends. The coward who can’t have a plan on his own and decide to follow someone instead of having his own opinion. The one who decided to follow the very man he despises for being able to follow his dream not matter what. The coward who would have to kill his friends, his camardes in order to protect eldians, in order to protect you.

Sometimes, he wonders if you still like him ? If you would still take care of him after the war, Would you take care of his wounds like you used to ? Would you cook his meal so he could heal properly ? Would you comfort him again when he’ll have nightmare ?

Does he even deserves your kindness ? Is it right for him to crave for your attention ? To always walk into your direction whenever he feels down or when he was dreaming about that day in Shiganshima ? The day when he fail as a soldier ?

For now, he will just enjoy your company as much as he can.

For now you don’t hate him, so he can still talk to you, go to you anytime he feels like he needs to. Enjoying every attention you would give him.

For now he doesn’t betray you, he doesn’t disappoint you.

But maybe.

Maybe you won’t hate him ? Maybe his action would make sense to you ? Maybe you would still like him ? Maybe he’ll be able ton confess to you ? Maybe you’ll understand that everything he does was to protect his people and you in particular.

Because for him, you are his light, his everything that help him to wake up and do his duty. You’re the one whop help him to remember why he is doing this, you’re the one who help him so he won’t go crazy.

You’re the one for him.

#attack on titans #aot #Shingeki no kyojin #snk #floch forster #floch x reader #Floch Forster x reader #Floch Forster headcanon #aot floch #snk floch #Floch forster imagine #🐥 anon #attack on titan #Snk x reader #aot x reader #Floch x y/n #eren jaeger

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mayabruhbruh · 4 years

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Stranger Things 4 Analysis and Theory

I don’t know if anyone else has done posts on this stuff yet (it’s really likely, but i’d not want to take the credit if i’m not the only one who’s thought of this)

I know @kaypeace21 has made tons of posts on the s4 movies from Video Store Friday, and many others have theories and analyses, but back in July I took it upon myself to research more into the very last few scenes of s3. Specifically the three months later time stamp, where Steve and Robin are in search for a new job.

My main focus was the four movies that they mentioned for Keith at the counter. “Animal House”, “The Hidden Fortress”, “Children Of Paradise”, and “The Apartment”.

(reminder that if you read this, it could be spoilers for the final cut of the actual show if i end up being correct about some of this, so read at your own risk)

My first theory, which I’ve already discussed in a separate reblog, is about The Hellfire Club. But i’ll say it here too.

Basically,

(sorry for the sucky quality)

Animal House is about two awkward freshmen going into college and joining a fraternity of rejects. It matches Mike, Dustin and the Hellfire Club perfectly! Personally, my lowkey theory is that they’re going to have to go though an entirety of initiation activities (possibly drugs too, if what we’ve heard is correct) and Lucas and Max will be in their own storylines up until the supernatural threat brings them back together again. This could be wayy off, but still its my idea.

As for Max and Lucas...

I’m not sure about the entirety of the plot of this movie, but the last line sounds a lot like something that would happen between Lumax. Lucas is a basketball jock now, I think that’s crystal clear now seeing from the Pep Rally poster, and how he’s always been the one in the group to be able to mask his nerdy side. For Dustin and Mike, I know it’s much harder for them. Anyways, Max, I’m pretty positive by now, is going to be extremely distant and defensive from everyone just like she was in the beginning of s2, since she just had a big change happening in her life. It’s the same now, except with the grief and loss of Billy. My guess, from the hints of this movie and other stuff, is that Lucas is going to come face to face with his reputation as a popular kid, and his love for Max. Like the summary says, he must decide between the advancement of his career or the girl that he loves. Real hard hitting stuff.

Onto the next one. MIKE WHEELER. (or will byers)

I watched an analysis video on this movie, because I haven’t seen it yet, but again the very last line is what I’d like to focus on.

My. Jaw. Dropped.

I’ve read many analyses of Mike Wheeler being gay (courtesy of @kaypeace21 @hawkinsschoolcounselor and MANY others), but I dunno, I was always just so skeptical no matter how much it made sense. But when I saw this WHAT THE HELL?!?’);/&? It’s stupid of me to not have believed it sooner, but I hope this is the movie that foreshadows Mike’s storyline this season. I’m assuming Mike will have to “prove his expertise in battle”, or perhaps prove he can go through with all of the initiation shit for The Hellfire Club, while hiding his growing revelation that he might be gay/bisexual.

BUT a possibly more likely scenario would be that this movie connects with Will Byers’ storyline this season instead. Perhaps the hardships of a new school and a new town has Will shaken up, and he also has his sexuality awakening that he has to hide from new people. I say that it’s more likely for him, because Will has always been more heavily queer-coded (not exactly heavier, but just extremely much more apparent and obvious opposed to Mikes queercoded subtext that we really had to dig for).

I also didn’t mention this in my reblog from earlier, but I want to address my opinions on the apparent cheerleader that meets Mike and befriends one another. One of my friends on twitter said Chrissy (her name, or so we think lmao) might be a key component to Mike being able to discover and come to terms with his sexuality. But then again, a different friend of mine thinks that the amount of content were getting is oddly suspicious, and that the Duffers are feeding us all the wrong information to lead us to all the wrong conclusions. But, at this point, why not both. At the moment, everyone thinks that Chrissy is Mikes new love interest, but what if she really isn’t, and they’re pulling a Robin on us (i call it a robin because it was technically straight-baiting in s3 LMFAO). I’m not saying that she might be a lesbian (although 👀 it says on her character info that she’s 18 (robins got some game to work with now ahaha)) but it could be a straight-bait up until she helps Mike realize his sexuality (i would have said realizes his love for Will😍😍 but recently ive been trying not to input byler into everything i fucking say, so theres how that’s going). Anyways. Last movie!

Now, I’m currently not super concrete on this one to be completely honest. I have a few in mind...

Okay, so don’t attack me, but this could possibly be a mileven storyline. It sort of fits. They have an undeniable connection, but “their fortunes shift considerably and they’re pushed apart” aka the misfortune of the mindflayer and hawkins not being safe for them leads them to moving away and literally being pushed apart. I don’t know about the pursuing other relationships, but we still have no idea what’s going on with El Hopper tbh, i havent a single clue what’s going to be happening with her storyline atm. But either way, that could be it.

ORRRR the MUCH more likely scenario, Jancy :)

Bloggers on here have already predicted that they wouldn’t be endgame, and I was only slightly skeptical because although their relationship was built on shared trauma, a very unstable foundation to have for a ship tbh, i still hung onto the fact that they cared for eachother a lot :,( But the entirety of their season 3 bickering and this summary kind of sealed the deal.

Just like Mike and El, Nancy and Jonathan have been pushed apart aswell. It was already seen in season three that they’d be better of leading separate lives, aka Jonathan was doing fine at the internship, whereas Nancy could have been somewhere better for herself. I doubt they broke up at the end of season 3, but there’s bound to be new relationships for them seperately. It sucks bc I love Jancy, but s3 showed how badly they snap at one another when there isn’t a life threatening event at hand. Jopper on the other hand, I thought their bickering was adorable, but i’m getting off track, sorry lmfaoo.

Once again, I probably am not the first to talk about these, but jsyk if you steal this from me specifically i will track you down and end you. I’ve been speculating about these things since April and July, which is pretty weak tbh, but that was when i had nothing better to do LMFAO. i hope i got at least something right, but i haven’t seen many of the video store friday’s movies, which sucks bc those could really help. But whatever.

(i wrote this really late at night, and it’s poorly edited bc my eyesight sucks lmfao, but i hope you get what i mean)

And that’s it! I hope you like it, or had some sort of impact from it idk, just sharing my thoughts tbh. Anygays, if you have any questions/added ideas/thoughts of any kind, my inbox is always here, you can private message me, and comment if you want!! i love y’all sm lmfao, so excited for the upcoming content were about to get soon, byee!

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #449-450

(both from yesterday)

What do you dislike about the house you live in? It's in the suburbs. Have you thought more about your funeral, or your wedding? My hypothetical wedding. Dinosaurs or unicorns? DINO BOIZ. What do you think of Maroon 5? I like some of their old stuff, and one or two of their newer songs, like "Payphone." What about Coldplay? I enjoy them. Fall Out Boy? Love 'em. Katy Perry? She's okay, I guess. There are a few songs I enjoy. Have you ever snuck into an R-rated movie when you weren’t old enough to see it without parents? No. What is your favorite Disney show? I don't have the slightest clue what's on Disney nowadays. What do you miss most about elementary school? Digging tunnels in the sandbox during recess with my friends. :'( When was the last time you saw the person you had your first kiss with? The start of February 2017. Hard to believe it's been four whole years... Is there anything hanging from the doorknob in your room? Ha, yes. Mom got me a little sign that says, "If I can't wear my flipflops, I'm not going," lmfao. All I wear are flipflops. What's your opinion on wearing pajamas in public? Do you yourself do that? I LITERALLY couldn't care less. I wear pjs in public sometimes; it really depends on where I'm going. What was the most severe punishment your parents gave you when you were growing up? Taking away technology was the worst. Do you usually fill up at the same gas station? Mom goes to a few different ones, depending on proximity and price. Have you ever owned any pet birds? What kinds/colours? I have not. I used to want a cockatiel for a long time, though. Do you pay much attention to your YouTube recommendations? If so, what was the last video that caught your attention? Kinda, I guess. I'm not sure what was the last recommended video I clicked. What has been the happiest time of your life so far? It's complicated. Most of my best memories are from high school with Jason, yet at the same time I was HORRIBLY depressed. I think my most pure happiness when I was really progressing with recovery. Moving on from him, losing tons of weight, feeling motivated... Have you ever had a crush on a celebrity? Who? My two biggest celebrity crushes ever have been/is Link Neal and Mark Fischbach. Do you have any fears you would rarely admit to anyone? Nah. Admitting fears isn't a big deal to me at all. What website do you spend most of your time on? YouTube. What did you have for dinner last night? A chicken sandwich. What could you talk about for hours? Meerkats, Silent Hill, Mark... Do you have a lamp beside your bed? Yes. What's your favorite ice cream topping? Chocolate syrup. What was the last TV show you binge watched? Avatar: The Last Airbender. Would you rather eat burgers or tacos? Oh, burgers for sure. I don't likes tacos. Did your mother change her maiden name when/if she got marred? Yes. Do you use TikTok? Nope. Are you closer to your mother or father? Mom. Do you own any costumes? No. Would you care if your SO went to a strip club? Hm. So long as they're not laying hands on any of the strippers and they ASKED me first, I don't think I'd care? I'm pretty sure I'd also only be okay with that if we were a long-term couple where very strong trust has been built. How helpful are your parents to you? Would they help you to pay for your first apartment? College? Where does the line end? They are so, so very helpful and I'm pretty sure would go to the ends of the earth to help me in any way they could. I know they WOULD help pay for the things you mentioned, but it's not something I want them to do. I want to be able to financially provide for myself, one day... Have you ever had to evacuate due to natural disaster? No. What video games did you have when you were growing up? LOADS. I looooooooved video games. What was the first election you ever voted in? This last one, actually. Can you hear anything right now? Yeah. I'm watching Gab play the Resident Evil 3 remake on hardcore mode. What's the coolest, most unusual pet you can think of? I've always thought sugar gliders were quite interesting as pets. I wanted one for a looong time, but I am not informed on how well they do in captivity and if it should even be legal for me to truly want one anymore. Have you ever seen a UFO or other weird object in the sky? By definition, it was a UFO. Sometimes I do even wonder if it was an alien spacecraft, given JUST how strange that shit was. I won't explain it again, just 'cuz I've done it in many surveys before. Are there any albums you know every single lyric to? I could probably nail Ozzy's Black Rain. What's your go-to painkiller? Advil. Does your mom have a celebrity look-alike? No, but there's a celebrity with her exact name. Do you think it’s pretty when 100s of balloons are let loose into the sky? NO NO NO NO NO that shit is SO upsetting. Where do you think they end up??? It's littering. Animals get choked and tangled by them all the time. What do you draw more than anything else? Definitely meerkats. Have you ever visited someone in a psychiatric home or ward? No, but people have visited me in one. Have you ever received a parking fine? No. Are you in any group chats? Who's in them? No. Do you have a lisp? No. Do you have an Instagram account? Do you use it often? I have three, but one's pretty much dead. I don't post stuff regularly on my other two either, really... Can you parallel park? I would absolutely hit another car. Have you ever played paintball? Did you get hit? No, that shit's dumb. You can get really hurt. What was your favorite fairy tale when you were a kid? Maybe Little Red Riding Hood? Are your parents still together? If not, do you know why? No. Mostly financial disagreements, but I know there's stuff I don't know. Have you ever been evicted? Why? Yes, because we couldn't keep up with rent. Have you ever worked as a manager or supervisor? Noooo. What was the last thing you voted for? So Snake Discovery (a reptile channel I love) hosted an enclosure build-off recently, and the winners were selected by fans via voting. The guy I voted for got 3rd. What's the most amazing animal you've ever seen in captivity? I've been very close to an elephant at a zoo once. They're magnificent. Having been to Sea World as a kid (I would NEVER go now), I also saw the killer whale show. As much of a spectacle as it was, it was animal abuse regardless. Do you like white chocolate? It's okay in small doses. Have you ever eaten snow? Yeah. Do you talk to your pets? Um, duh. Have you ever adopted a stray? (Cat or dog?) Cats, yes. Do you read about any mythology? (Greek, Roman, Norse, Egyptian, etc) No, not by my own will. I DO love mythology, I just... don't read it. Do you ever use bath bombs? No. Have you ever gotten angry at an employee and complained to the manager? No. Have you ever sent your food back at a restaurant? Yes, because they got my meal wrong. I was REALLY shy to do it, but I made sure to do it politely and apologetically. Do you sleep in a bra? What mad lad sleeps in a bra???????????? Has your ex ever gone out with someone close to you? No. Can you suggest someone funny on YouTube? I'll go for someone what isn't my obvious vote, ha ha. There are truly so many, but Garrett Watts is high on the list. Elena Bateman, too. Can you do a handstand? No. Has anyone close to you ever been suicidal? Yes. Have you ever broken someone's heart and didn't care? Tyler sure acted like I did, and to be entirely frank, I didn't care very much, but only because it was a HUGE overreaction and I knew he'd be fine quick. What color is your hairbrush? It's just a white comb. Who was your most recent call from? My psychiatrist. Have you ever watched someone die? Only animals... It's the absolute worst. Are you currently "seeing" someone? No. Are you friends with someone who's autistic? I might be, but I know my niece is on the spectrum. Do you like humans? To be entirely transparent... I think I wish humans were never a thing. We've done so, so much harm to the planet, some things irrevocable. Earth would be a much healthier, far more peaceful place if we'd never existed. Do you like pandas? I love pandas. P.S., fuck outta here if you're one of the people who don't support conservation efforts for them. That shit blows my mind. What do you think of Evanescence? They're great. Amy's voice is absolutely incredible. I don't even think that's an opinion, but global fact, ha ha. What do you think of Avenged Sevenfold? I like some of their stuff. I haven't heard a whole lot though, honestly. What do you think of Halestorm? ^ Do you think you are attractive? God no. I don't see me as an attractive person at all. Do you like dinosaurs? I love 'em; I was OBSESSED as a kid, and my first aspired job was a paleontologist. Do you like lasagna? No. Do you share a room? No. When was the last time you climbed a tree? Never, actually. Have you ever been hospitalized for more than 2 weeks? I think my longest was three. What can you do that none of your friends can do? I dunno. Why did you last go to the airport? Mom and I were dropping Sara off so she could go home. Who was the last person to see you in your underwear? My mom. Who’s the most attractive female you’ve ever seen? Maybe Alissa White-Gluz from Arch Enemy? Or my friend Alon. I'm certain there's more, because women are just so fuckin beautiful asdkfajlwejkrjqwe Red, white, yellow, or pink roses? I actually like the original, rich red. Do you think someone would ever want to marry you? Well, two people have, but one absolutely doesn't anymore and the other knows that it's not healthy or emotionally safe for either of us to imagine that at this time. I don't know if anyone ever will again. Do you like Thanksgiving? No. Like I enjoy the focus on thankfulness, but the history isn't right and I don't enjoy the food. Do you ever wear colored eye liner? No. Have you ever used a darkroom? No. Have you ever been "popular"? No. Has someone ever tried to convert you? Yes. Have you ever been told that you dress like a slut? No, not that how someone dresses has any relevance to their sexual activity. What’s your most recent obsession? Final Fantasy X jfccccccc. Video games or board games? The former. Are you scared of tarantulas? As much as I talk about them... you can probably tell I have a massive interest in them, ha ha. However, even though I love them, they're still sorta scary. Like, threat poses are no joke. And it's terrifying on the very rare occasion they hiss. During Covid, do you wear a mask or no mask? I'm fully vaccinated, and yet I still wear a mask because I'm a considerate human fucking being. Do you have a PlayStation 4? No, but I reeeeaaally want one. :/ Have you ever played Fortnite? Nah, not my type of game. Do you like anime? Yeah. Have you ever been on a boat? Yeah. I was always SO excited as a kid when Dad would take the boat out for a fishing trip. Have you ever played Kingdom Hearts? I've played some of it with Jason. I wasn't a fan of it. Have you ever built a snowman? Yes. DC or Marvel? I don't really have a preference.

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Do you prefer your nails long or short? Why? Short, because I can't keep my nails long for the life of me. I pick/peel my nails badly. Do you have any vinyl records? No. Are you still in touch with your best friend from high school? No. Have you ever visited any celebrity gravesites? No. How do you feel about archaeology? It's extremely fascinating. Would you have a big cat (like a tiger) for a pet if you could? No. I could never provide the environment they need, and it's simply not safe. They are not domestic animals, and even the ones that seem most tame can surprise you. What are your favorite smells? Cinnamon rolls, coffee, lilac, fresh baked bread, barbecue, etc. Have you ever had to block people online for harassing you? I'm not sure, actually... What is your favorite thing to do on The Sims? Surveys have a lot of questions about those games... I only ever played the ones that focused on animals, and I think I most enjoyed breeding them and naming the bbz. :^) And watching their behavior. Which hair color you've had has been your favorite? Red. If you were stupid-rich, would you ever actually want a mansion? No. I do not need all that room, nor am I wasting my money on such excessive space. What drinking games have you played? None. Do you take lessons for anything? No. Has something really heavy ever fallen on you? No. If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear? Only black. Does your shower have curtains or a glass door/wall? Curtains. If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other? One is a snake and the other is a cat, so. Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in? No. Besides salt and butter, do you put anything on your popcorn? Nothing besides what you mentioned. Are you lonely? I'm way too lonely for it to be healthy. Do you like pineapple? Yep. Have you ever seen fireflies? Yes; they're endemic to here. Have you ever trespassed? As a kid, yes. Do you raise your hand or participate in class? I did sometimes. Are you afraid of heights? Yes. Are you afraid of the dark? No. Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume? No. Have you ever written a poem? I've written a lot. Would you ever be a tornado chaser? FUCK TO THE HELL NO. What is your favorite thing to eat with bbq sauce, if you even like that stuff? I hate bbq sauce. Have you ever had to do a class in summer school? No. Have you ever been to the rainforest? No. Ever thought about writing a book? Yes. Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone? Yes. Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube? Nope. Have you seen all of the Jaws movies? No, only the first one with Tyler. It was aight. Have you ever had a black eye? No. Is your ex sexually attractive to you still? I haven't seen a picture of Jason in years, and I don't want to. Not because I care about how he looks now, it'd just be extremely triggering to see his face. I still find Sara gorgeous. Have you ever been to couple’s counseling? No. How often does your employer ask you to work overtime? N/A When was the last time you were scared? Ummmm I really can't say I know. What’s your favorite song by Rihanna? "Disturbia" is where it's AT. There's this synthwave edit of it that I positively adore. Can you speak binary? No. Have you ever had a pet that you disliked? A family pet, yes. Do you like boys with long hair? UGH yes. Do you like root beer? Not really, no. Do you like ice cream cake? Not really. Do you ever dream of yourself dying? That's not all that rare in my nightmares. What song always makes you sad? I think two songs are tied for what makes me most sad: "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin and "Eternally Yours" by Motionless In White. Were you mean as a little kid? No; I was a sweet kid. Have you ever tried spam? No, it looks SO gross to me. How fast can you run? This is pathetic, but I don't think I CAN run. My knees are too weak. I think my weight coming down on them would just make me crumple over. Have you ever bought something from Spencer's? Yeah. Have you ever been on a diet? I've tried diets many times. Do you prefer light or dark jeans? Dark. When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen? I almost always just listen. Do you have any of your exes as friends on Facebook? Yeah. Who was your first love? Do you ever miss that person? Jason. I miss his memory every day. I say "memory" because it's been years, and I have no way of knowing who he is today. How many cars are parked at your house right now? One. Has anyone ever told you you’re a control freak? No. Do you know anyone who has gone missing? If so, were they ever found? Not personally. What was the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten? Some wings with extremely hot sauce at Buffalo Wild Wings. Have you ever deliberately tried to get someone drunk? Um yeah, no. Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? No. I don't like sprinkles in general. Do you know how to do the moon walk? No. Has anybody ever told you that you have a good singing voice? Yes, somehow. Onion rings or french fries? French fries, for sure. Who is the best cook that you know? Dunno. If you have your ears pierced, when did you get them pierced? When I was a kid. I don't remember the age, but I was old enough to decide myself that I wanted them pierced. If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you? They have their own places now. Do you like fried rice? Yessss. Are there any animals you refuse to touch? Some bugs. Have you ever intentionally fed a house spider? I don't believe so, no. What makes you feel lucky? That I have the family I do. What is something nice going on in your life right now? Just the gym-going, really... Who’s the worst person you’ve encountered on the Internet? An old friend I just knew as Shakes. If death wasn’t a consequence, what would you try? Maybe sky-diving, idk. Has a teacher ever told you off? No. Have you ever told off a teacher? No. Do/did you take school seriously or not? I certainly did. How do you usually cope with breakups? Not well. I obsess over how something's wrong with me and I'm not good enough for anyone. Disney princess or Disney animal movies? Animals, for sure. What's your favorite Katy Perry song? It's evading me right now... Have you ever made/tried friendship bread!? Omg, I forgot that was a thing! I actually have. I've completely forgotten the gist of it or even how it tastes, but I remember I loved it. What do you want to know about the future? If I'll ever be content and happy. What's your biggest insecurity? My weight. Ever found something disgusting in your food while eating out? No, thank god. Does the area where you live have a good or bad reputation? A very bad one. Are there any holidays that you don't celebrate? Yeah, like St. Patrick's Day, among some others. If you could find out who you're gonna marry right now, would you? Yes. Save myself time and heartbreak. How important is it to you that your partner has the same religious views? I wouldn't date someone very religious. If they're more tame about it, that's fine, but I'd prefer to not date a religious individual. Do you own a Wii? Yeah. I've kinda been wanting to play Guitar Hero or Rock Band lately on it... Do you like a lot of cheese on your pizza? "A regular, reasonable amount of cheese." <<<< This. I really don't like when things are so cheesy that it leaves a ridiculous trail when you try to separate pieces. Have you ever been made fun of because of your sexuality? Not directly to my face, but I can guarantee people I know had certain ~opinions~ on it when I came out. I also like just came out as pansexual versus bi, and I'm not even telling a lot of people in my personal life because I know they'll find the concept absolutely ridiculous. What would you do if you found an abandoned animal? "Depends on what type of an animal it was, and whether it was friendly or skittish." <<<< This. I'm obviously not going to try to usher a rabid dog over to me (I'd call a rescue or something if the animal appeared potentially dangerous), but if the animal appeared safe, my heart would absolutely lead me to try and get the animal to come to me so I could take it home and try to find the owner. Have you ever kissed someone who had a tongue piercing? No. What singer/band do you think deserves to be more famous than they are? Jonathan Young from YouTube. He is INCREDIBLE. He deserves to be picked up by a label so badly. What is your favorite PlayStation 1 game? The original Silent Hill, no competition. Do you think objectum sexuals are real, or attention seekers? I really can't imagine someone pretending to want to fuck their car for attention. I don't get it AT ALL, and it's weird as shit to me, but I mean, I don't think people can control what they're attracted to. How far out of your age bracket would you date? 21-early 30s, probs. Have you ever had an STD? No. Have you ever tried pho? No. Pick one: Crash Bandicoot or Spyro? Spyro!!!! I have the original trilogies of both series, but Spyro is where it's AT. Does your job allow piercings or tattoos? I'm unemployed, but I wouldn't work at a job that didn't, honestly. If you could dye your hair any color right now with absolutely no restrictions, what color would you dye it? Maybe like a galaxy-esque mixture of layered colors. I've wanted that for YEARS. Have you ever known a white supremacist? This region is swimming in them. Have you ever spoken to a detective before? No. Do ladders scare you? Climbing them does, yes. Do you have any tattoos on your arms? Yeah. Have you ever thrown up on anybody? Unless I did unknowingly as a baby, no. How many people have you turned down when they asked you out? Uhhh two or three, maybe? What is your favourite kind of fruit cobbler? I actually haven't tried enough to have an educated favorite, but I can say I love peach. Do you hear any other people talking right now? I'm watching a let's player play Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice, so I hear her, obviously. When was the last time you started a new medication? It's been a while, idk. What is your favourite type of nut? Cashews, I guess. I don't really like nuts, but I definitely like cashew bars. Where did you eat the best pizza you’ve ever eaten in your life? ... Domino's lmaoooo. Did you ever watch The Rugrats when you were a kid? Yeah, I loved that show. I even had two video games. Do you know anyone who was adopted? Yes. Can you name all 50 US state capital cities? No. Can you tie balloons? I can't, actually. Have you had a deep conversation with anyone today? Yeah. I wanted Sara's advice on something I'm dealing with. On your Facebook friends list, who was the last person to have their b-day? One of my sisters' was yesterday, actually. What did you/are you having for dinner tonight? I had Special K cereal. Name some healthy foods that you enjoy eating. Strawberries, apples, bananas, (sometimes) broccoli, other things that aren't coming to me. Who was the last person you Facebook messaged? My friend Girt. What flavor was the last cupcake you ate? The cupcake itself was chocolate, and the icing was uhhhh... blue? Apart from sleeping, what do you plan to do tonight? I haven't done anything of note. I'm probably going to bed soon. What’s the age difference between your parents? Two years, I think. When was the last time you ate an apple? Today. I have been on a big sliced apples w/ peanut butter kick lately. Have you had any caffeinated beverages today? I have soda every day. :x Have you eaten any chocolate today? What kind? Mom brought me a Reese's home today when she went out with a friend. How many different towns/cities have you lived in? Three. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone special? Poems, yes. Are you attracted to the last person you Facebook messaged? Not very much physically. Emotionally... I don't know. Do you have any ice cream in your freezer? What flavor is it? No. Ice cream is my #1 comfort food, so that's a big "keep out of the house."

#survey #surveys #random questions

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werezmastarbucks · 4 years

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Whitmore Guy - the ghost

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Kai Parker x fem!Reader slowburn

whatever gifs I’m going to use on this one, I hope the creators are okay with that

word count: 2044

warnings: none

“Have you seen the new IT guy yet?”

“The uh- what?” Ric was trying to consume a chocolate bar without taking his eyes or hands off the paper he was grading. Y/N sighed patiently – or, rather, to gain some patience. Every time she felt like yelling at Saltzman she took a deep breath and travelled down the memory lane back to the times when he was just a history teacher at school. Back when they were all teens with awkwardly round faces and acne, trying really hard to impress each other, and survive ‘animal attacks’ that just started happening in the town. She recalled thinking the new teacher was actually a vampire. The sheer stupidity of her, while Stefan Salvatore was literally sitting next to her.

Back then, Ric was still youthful, energetic, even handsome, as some girls claimed. Y/N always perceived him as a parent figure, the uncle you may bump into in a bar you go to with your mates to pretend you’re old enough. To think that this grumpy, scruffy grandpa thirty-hundred years old used to be that energetic, bopping teacher they could all trust…

“I’m saying, have-you-met-Mal-yet?”

“Huh?” Ric looked up to her, and his hand inserted the bar into his mouth quickly, so that he could start chewing.

“Are you doing okay, mister Saltzman?”

Y/N called him that when she was trying to be ironic.

“We got a new IT guy? Where the hell is he? I’ve been struggling with this thing for ages”, Alaric pointed at his laptop, safely shut, after it had vomited a siren-like crackling earlier that morning. God only knows what kind of websites Ric has been visiting.

“He’s been in for like, couple of days”.

“Yeah, that’s when the password changed, I saw that”, Saltzman frowned, “that note on the first floor, on the notice board, said that there was a treasure map or crap like this. The whole place has been running on mobile since Monday. Is he toying with us? Who hired him?”

“It’s ‘revenant94’.

“What?”

“The password”.

Y/N settled her coffee mug on the desk and stretched her back, checking the room for people simultaneously. They were alone in the teacher’s space; Y/N liked sneaking in here for lunch breaks or when she just felt overwhelmed, to socialize, bizarrely.

“Anyway, I’ve met him the other day. And he’s weird”.

There it is. The magical spot to hit, to light that hunting spark in Alaric Saltzman’s light green eyes. He has always been an adventurer first and everything else second. Vampire hunting was just a necessary measure in the dire conditions given to him at the point of his life.

“Bad-weird?”

“Weird-weird”, she still wasn’t sure they were completely safe chatting about this in here. She got up and closed the door gently. Then Y/N started pacing lazily between the unevenly placed desks, standing checkers to chess, in a mysterious pattern.

“He looks too good, and he acts too friendly. He is…” she tried to find the word, it was on the tip of her tongue, and yet, it escaped.

“Weird”.

“Your notoriously inaccurate gut feeling once placed an innocent man among monsters”, Ric reminded her.

She recalled that. That one time she was completely sure her neighbor Bruce killed her father, for reasons she wouldn’t be able to awaken anymore. In reality, they still didn’t know who did it, but it wasn’t Bruce as the man was away from the town the night it happened.

“Don ‘t you allow that maybe you think he’s weird because he’s cute? Sometimes you say weird when you mean adorable. Or angry. Or upset. You just generally like labeling people freaks”.

“Okay, you’re not taking it seriously”.

Ric threw himself back in the chair and sighed noisily. He studied the ceiling for some time.

“In our life, Y/N, we have every right to be paranoid about good things. After everything that’s happened every nice thing comes across as a warning. That’s a normal reaction. But if you think he’s off, I’ll check on him, sure. I mean, I will meet him inevitably, right?”

They looked at each other. Y/N shrugged.

______________________________________________________________

Ric wasn’t able to get ahold of Mal for the whole of next week, in fact, and it was strange how for the first seven days of Mal’s working Y/N was the only person who’s been talking to him. The guy even complained once that he felt like a ghost, which sparkled the whole new package of fiery theories in her. Then, the next day, she saw Mal chat with the English major student. In a rather flirtatious way, mind you; but it at least proved he was real.

Alaric was left a little puzzled after Mal had fixed his barely breathing laptop; but mostly annoyed.

‘How fast is this guy talking? Does he ever breathe or something?’

To her question, whether he was able to place Mal among any species of supernatural creatures, Saltzman replied something along the lines of yeah, a sickeningly energetic young man with ego, which in his language usually meant abnormal, but not alarming. Y/N was more than sure that Ric gave up on life and just tried to get away from the IT guy as far as possible. What happened to the previous one anyway? Some people said he’d left. Others claimed he just disappeared after Friday’s party at the Craze, a new bar opened almost on the border with Mystic Falls. Nobody really cared. Mal managed to charm just about everybody – that is, when people finally started seeing him – except a few very exhausted individuals who refused to enjoy life.

The feeling Y/N was getting about Mal was inexplicable, good, too good, in fact. She was torn between enthusiastic and careful; one feels that way when a person calls you in the middle of the night and tells you that you have won a billion dollars. How come you don’t remember buying the lottery ticket?

The fact that he had a girlfriend wasn’t all that important – Y/N craved companionship, not romance; her friends were enough but they were all carrying weight of, well, ten years of fighting this damn town. Mal didn’t have all that. He blasted music in the basement where he had built himself a mancave using old boxes and discarded cupboards from the science floors. He always smiled. He was smart. He didn’t take any shit from anybody. And for some uneven reason, he treated Y/N like she was his partner in crime. Maybe that was the most suspicious thing. Y/N always wanted an older brother, and all male figures she chose to act in that character, pushed back.

_____________________________________________________________

Damon weighed the glass in his hand lazily.

“Caroline’s been livid with you about the dance party?”

Y/N sighed, rubbing her knee. Ever since Caroline graduated, she’s been delegating her tasks to Y/N, who apparently had nothing better to do than organize two celebrations every month. No wonder she completely forgot about the selection of music for that one party that was supposed to happen at the end of the month, vaguely described as a nostalgia flick. Many times Y/N got ready to say, hey, Caroline. I have my own shit to do. If you want these events, come back to the college, get a job and do it yourself. I have tons of crying young adults every day whimpering over their dead dogs and burnt deadlines, and frankly, I deserve four holidays a year.

But she never said it, somehow.

“I am turning into a pusharound”, she realized, as she stood up, walking to the Damon’s sacred alcohol table. She took a glass which burst in a welcoming ringing, and poured herself a little of smelly golden liquid.

“I thought you liked organizing things. Whatever happened to ‘I’ll make them all dance to Stevie Nicks until their butts fall off?”

“It faded, Damon, it went down into my shit storm of a work. I am drained. I’ve been feeling completely lost for the last six months”.

The vampire’s sharp eyebrows made a gracious swing. Every time Damon did his trademark face of an Italian statue Y/N couldn’t help but remember the years when she’d been helplessly in love with him. She and her knee-length socks, and lots of jewellery, and bravery of a suicidal teenager, she thought that was enough to win his love. The disappointment was bitter.

“Why’s that?”

“Eh”, she brushed it off, relaxing deep in the sofa, outstretching her feet, “autumn was nasty, you know that kind of seasonal decline, and then, no snow in winter, and bang, it’s cold spring, and you gotta not eat again because nervous… and it felt like it’s been two days since Matt died, but when I look at the clock, it’s already mid May, and I can’t believe it. I feel like I haven’t processed his death properly, and it’s tugging on me. But I don’t really know what to do at this point. Everybody’s moved on”.

Damon drowned his face into his glass with that preoccupied look he wore when he couldn’t cope with what he started. Sometimes, he could only listen. That was the least he could do for the girl. Listen to her babbling away, and remember that it could have been much worse, she could have been much further away from him.

“Thank God I have my buddy now and I even almost figured out what to do with this shit faced party. No more parties after this one… I’ll tell her I won’t organize stuff people don’t appreciate, I mean…”

“What buddy?” Damon intervened passively.

Y/N jumped up, balancing the glass in her hand, and decided it would be best to down it until she poured it all on Damon’s couch, and he tore all her hair out. She gulped whiskey in two breaths, trying to clench her teeth so that she doesn’t puke it all back. As soon as the drink flows down and reaches whatever cells there are, it will soothe her, and clear her head. She sat on her legs, piercing Damon with a concerned look.

“There’s this new IT guy at Whitmore. He’s too cool to be true, and everybody loves him, except for Ric, and I’m sure you’ll absolutely hate him, too”.

“Why’s that?”

“He’s very chatty and charming, like a complete psychopath. He’s got dead eyes but he’s incredibly funny, and we listen to the same music. He’s always up for anything. He’s too…”

The look on Salvatore’s face said he understood exactly the type of person this guy was. Damon met many a folk like that; take Kol, that idiotic creature that was draining life of every party of people. Or early version of Jeremy, depressed yet too loud, craving attention. Or even Forbes herself; now she’s a friend, but back in the times, she was unbearable. Damon still had vague nightmares in which Caroline was trying to get him to go on a picnic in her usual commanding squeaky voice.

“So, steer his energy in doing this dance for you. And go easy on yourself, little one”.

When Damon called her that, Y/N felt like she was sixteen again, laying at the den of a tiger, if tigers dug caves or, like, very complicated dungeons, with skulls of their enemies scattered and the suggestive fires blazing along the walls. She shivered internally, asking herself, how she had managed to finally escape Damon’s glamor. She remembered being completely heartbroken, and then suddenly, she wasn’t. Good for her.

“Yeah, I’ll get him to help me. But I would be stoked if you could examine him. Ric couldn’t take him, the guy’s too colorful. I have a weird feeling about him”.

“What kind?”

She was tired of shrugging with confusion.

“Just do it. You’ll see. There’s something wrong about him”.

“Do you always hang out with people you deem suspicious?” Damon sounded painfully familiar. Ric and him, they became almost like a married couple over the years. Same old narrative, sung in slightly different tempos.

“Okay”, he gave up. “I’ll come to your nostalgia flick dance thing, and I’ll take a look at him. Will that make you happy?”

She looked at the alcohol sanctuary again.

#kai parker #kai parker imagine #kai parker x reader #damon salvatore #vampire diaries #whitmore guy

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popculturebuffet · 4 years

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Top 10 Regular Show Episodes

Close Enough is Close! 2 more days and a show i’ve waited without hyperbole years for will finally land offically. While i’ve seen three episodes preelease, one because of a french film festival the other two because HBO made an oopsie, and it’s more than likely i’ll be seeing those episodes again thursday, it dosen’t make it any less special, as with an offical release comes the fandom finally becoming a thing and the ablility to watch the episodes over and over again.. on computer till HBO gets it’s shit together but still. IT’s a great time. And my hype for the show made me revisit it’s big brother: Regular Show. Created by what would happen if you condesned california into a person, JG Quintel, Regular Show, as you all damn well know but I like doing anyway so as rigby would say, STOP TALKING, was about two slackers and best bros: Laidback hipster and hurricane when it came to talking to women, Mordecai and Rigby a high strung, idiotic, impulsive, and frequently angry racoon who worked, when they absolutley had to, at a park. Joining them at the park were their coworkers and later closest friends: Benson, their constnatly angry boss who constnatly belts out empty threats to fire them and has a rather sad personal life, Skips, a centuries old yeti whose literally seen it all and despenses advice for the duo and is voiced by everyone’s faviorite grandpa/jedi/murder clown Mark Hamill, Muscle Man, a grotesque blob of a man who likes “My mom” jokes and breaking things, Hi Five Ghost, Muscle Man’s sidekick who got like.. one episode focusing on him alone over 8 seasons moving on, and Pops, an odd but unfailingly sweet and kind vicotrian era gentleman whose also basically immortal and is Bensons’ boss in name only. The Park Crew spend their days working, or in our main duo’s case trying to get out of work to do anything else, while dealing with every day issues that would quickly ballon into insanity. Getting pops a birthday present of Fuzzy Dice from a local pizza place ended up with the crew having to fight a bunch of anamatonic animals that were stashing diamonds in there. Trying to get concert tickets involved getting caffine from the nipples of a giant sentient coffee bean in order to stay awake long enough to do the extra work. And Mordecai trying to delete an embrarassing message off his crush Margret’s voice mail lead to him and rigby getting hauled in front of a bunch of a message guardians, one of which is a sentient smoke signal that wanted to burn them while the other replied with “we’ree not going to burn them when have we ever burned anybody”... I love and miss those guys. Oh and it’s resolved by having to playt he embarassing song he sang while said message beings groove to it then ask him to colaberate with them on their album. THis show was on all the drugs and I am all the hear for it. I could go all day obviously but this section is long enough as is, let’s move on.

Regular Show came at JUST the right time for Cartoon Netowork: Similar to how the 80s doom patrol comic started off really bland and cookie cutter and not at all doom patrol and then grant morrison came in, had hte previous writer kill almost everything, then rebuilt it from scratch with crazy, CN had few shows left and was coming off a really terrible attempt at competeing with NIck and Disney Channel’s live action dommance with a bunch of dude broy reality shows and other ill conceved ideas. The network had a few shows, Total Drama, The Clone Wars which got better and I need to watch those better seasons at some point, but they weren’t enough to make the network thrive again. SO enter adventure time and regular show: BOth were creative, funny , a bit rough around the ages, and kind of nuts, but both were massive hits: The shows hit almost every demographics sweet spots: Kids like the bright colors, fun designs, and insanity, teens loved the edgy bits of the humor and also the insanity and 20 somethings and older both found refrences they got and loved, and well.. insanity. I mean being fucking nuts but also wonderful is kind of the watchword for most animation nowadays. While in the past in my own head i’ve played down Regular Show’s part in things, after all it came second and had a rough patch I told myself.. but I was wrong. Both shows had a lot of the same elements; insane stuff, great voice acting and good humor especially as they evolved.. but both also evolved in largely the same way and that way helped change animation for the next decade: Both, despite being comeidies, regular show keeping to it a bit more than adventure time did as they evolved, had the characters grow, something a lot of animated comedies didn’t do as much ast the time, even the good ones. THey had season long arcs, things that are now standard features in most cartoons for good reason were MADE standard by these shows. It’s just regular show’s legacy got diluted by shows that TRIED to copy it but both failed to see that it grew past season one or that it’s being okay for kids but really based in adult life and problems meant copycats like fanboy and chum chum, sanjay and craig and breadwinners, all thankfully long dead, eventually sputtered out and died. That and Nick is REALLY shitty at maintaing shows or treating creators with anything resembling respect. Somehow Teen Titans Go is still alive despite having similar failings but you can’t win everything. It didn’t help gravity falls came along right after and proceded to be even more influentail than both of these shows. Hmmm I just realized I haven’t done any gravity falls reviews here.. I gotta get on that. But while the show got eclipsed in quality and popularity I do still think it holds up for the most part as funny, charming and with , for the most part, good character arcs, it’s just that a bit of incosntientcy, some abrubtly done actions and a REALLY fucking terrible arc in season 6 dull the show a bit in comparison to what came after, but I do realize now it’s still worht watching, remembering and laughing at. It may of not been the greatest, but damn it was good. So with my nostaliga for the show popping up, my faith in it restored, and it’s sucessor showing up in a few days, I decided to do a little something for the ocassion. I WAS going to do a full on review, but had troulbe finding an episode as some of my faviorites are part of a larger arc that was hurt by a later arc, and the show ping ponged between slice of life and utter insanity enought hat it was hard to peg down to jus tone or two episodes. So while I WILL review the show eventually, it has both good and bad episodes needing it, I decided instead to dig out something I hadn’t done in far too long: a top whatver lists! Now while I do get these things are clickbaity, because they are, I.. honestly just love making them. Even if i’ts not for any specific purpose I just love ranking, the stress, even if I normally hate stress given my anxiety, of trying to narrow them down, and the satisfaction of taking a ton of episodes and melting htem down into the best of them. And with a show as long and varied as regular show, If igured this was the best way to show it off before I dived into it eventually. I’ll obviously be doing more top, and bottom lists in the future, but for now this seemd like a godo place to get back to it. As Now a few more things before we finally get started. Yes I know i’ve gone on for a few years now but i’m almost done. This list is obviously, my opinon. If you disagree fine, and feel free to comment or shoot me an ask about it but I stand by my list and what I choose. I had to boil down over 60 episodes I picked to possibly be on the list and even after it was down to 40 cuts were really difficult, .. Also just as a quick note there are no episodes from seasons 1, 6, 7 and 8, and that’s not on purpose, as the last two seasons are really good, it just fell out that way and i’m sorry about it. So with that out of the way grabs some sodas and wings, get out your maxi gloves, and bring out your best sentient earworms wearing sunglassses, after the cut I count down the top 10 Regular Show episodes. OOOOOOOOO!

10. I Like You, Hi (Season 5, Episode 26) As you’ll be able to tell by the rest of this list Season 5 is my faviorite, and it’s where I feel the series hit it’s peak before next season lead to it’s valley. It’s got a ton of great episodes, as this list will attest, some great character development, and was still really damn funny. But what put it over the top for me was the Mordecai and CJ arc. At the end of the last season as you probably know the show wrote out Margret, having her finally get into college like she’d wanted since she got an actual character back in “Camping Be Cool” instead of just being “that hot girl mordecai really likes but is too scared to persue”, and another fantastic episode we’ll be getting to, Mordecai was in position to move on. Re-Enter CJ. CJ was introduced earlier in the season 3 ep “Yes Dude Yes” which itself is really good, where Mordecai thought margret was engaged and with Rigby’s encouragment, ended up meeting CJ, stands for Cloudy Jay if your curious, a sentient cloud voiced by the wonderful LInda Cardenelli, aka wendy from gravity falls and currently co star of the equally wonderful show Dead to Me. Seriously go check it out on netflix, it’s really good. It naturally went pearshaped since Margret wasn’t engaged, he tried going out with both, she turned into a thunderstorm out of rage... as you do.. it’s like the season 6 plot but less infurating and more understandable. But the two remeet, and had a kiss on new years while not knowing it’s the other person under am ask.. and then CJ ran and both thought the other was upset: MOrdecai for him being MOrdecai, and CJ for running out on him and agreed to be friends. That didn’t last, though it did give us another classic on this list, as while exes can be friends and all, the two still had something between them. Thus came this one. And it was a hard one as it barely inched out the finale of their relationship arc, Real Date, which had the ceo of a dating company try to break them up and be really damny funny but it’s ulitmatley this one being just as hilarious while being a great character piece that gets it the rub. As the episode opens Mordecai and CJ have been spending a LOT of time together and i’ts clear there’s a spark there.. but Mordecai insists it’s platonic. And yes there is a bad habit of animation being unable to accept females and males who are into the oppistie sex can’t be friends without being attracted to each other. It’s being cleared up more lately, but as Star Vs showed it still happens sometimes. But it works here: The two STARTED with dating, made out on new years, and are attracted to each other it’s just clear both were in denial about it. It’s not saying “well they have chemstiry so fuck their partners’ like star vs or “if you loved someone once those feelings will return and destroy yoru current relationship” like next season.... season 6′s arc is a tirefire burn it. But the issue is forced when, while texting about an extreme baking show together while CJ’s at her job at a sports bar, it autocrrects from Yuji, the show’s host, to you hi, sending the title message “I like you, hi”. Mordecai, being even less adept with his feelings and anxiety towards women than me and trust me that’s saying something, spirals and we do get the episodes best scene, narrowly beating out it’s climax, where Mordecai summons a war council.. aka the rest of the main cast minus benson but plus Thomas, the intern who I wish stuck around longer even after he turned out to be a russian spy because they ran out of ideas for him, voiced by Roger Craig Smith and distractingly using his future sonic voice.

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I just.. love everything about the scnee. From the term pulling a mordecai, to Rigby joining in, deservedly as he’s had front row seats for a lot of this bollocks, to everyone’s suggestions especially Muscle Man’s half assed one that somehow, but unsuprisngly, works for him and Starla. Naturally Mordecai comes up with what Rigby HIMSELF admits is a Rigby level half assed scheme to get an actual photo with Yuji rather than just admit the truth. Yuji himself is an utter delight, having had his star not rise as fast as he’d like thanks to autocorrect and being entirely on board, and when it backfires as MOrdecai ends up autocorrected and sends the message thrice and gets sucked into the phone again, admits i’ts “pretty extreme’. I love the guy and i’m prety sure he showed up again, to my delight.

In the phone Mordecai meets some old friends, the message guardians who I mentioned in the “insane shit this show has done” bit earlier: old forms of messaging who police texting, all voiced by Rich Fulcher of the Mighty Boosh and Snuffbox Fame.

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I love Rich and wish these guys could show up in close enough. Maybe they can, I don’t know how rights issues with turner properties work when it comes to two diffrent audiences entirely. Anyways what really makes the episode, besides the great callbacks in this scene, is when confronted with everything going on, Mordecai.. tries to run into the void, with Rigby, The Message Recorder and the Smoke Signal all encouraging him to come back. “There’s nothing out there for you, literally it’s just a blank void”. With the leading tape recorder pointing out from their text history not only how great CJ is but how much he seems to like her with Mordecai finally coming back and admitting the obvious: He does like her.. he’s just scared of beefing it again. Which he does but that’s not the point. Rigby, who as part of his character development helps Mordecai quite a bit with this stuff by being a neutral party, though he also likes CJ better than Margret which is a mood even though I don’t care which one you ship mordecai with frankly, you do you, I have my prefrences. And with that Mordecai finally texts her and asks her out, with her accepting via winky face.. with an added text to clarify it for his neuotic ass.. which is also a mood as my neuortic ass could use that a lot. Overall just a wonderful , hilarious and good bit of character growth.. that season 6 throws in the oven, but that’s a long rant for another day. On it’s own, “I LIke you, hi” is a good character piece for mordecai whlie still being really damn funny.

9. Thanksgiving Special (Season 5, Episode 15)

Regular Show was really damn great at holliday specials. Their terror tales from the park every halloween were always a nice treat and a good replacement for Simpsons “Treehouse of Horror” which still exists, it’s just no one cares at this point, and their christmas and new years episodes are both really damn good, the first Christmas Episode being in contention for this list even. But to me the best of the best was easily Season 5′s thanksgiving episode.

The premise is simple: Mordecai and Rigby accidnetly destroy thanksgiving dinner, which the park crew is having for everyone and their famllies and, refusing to take Benson trying to dismiss their attempts to help fix their mistake, end up joining a songwriting contest to try and win a Turducken.. a natural one that’s born every 1000 Years because this is regular show. To do this they have to beat a parody of everyone’s least faviorite president Donald Trump, Rich Buckner. The fact that trump was basically the main villian of a holliday special a year before he became president is not lost on me and is one of the most accurate depections of the man i’ve ever seen. The fact Rich steals the prize despite our boys winning from his blimp with a grappling hook is peak trump. The fact Trump has’nt stolen more things with a grappling hook in real life is only because his hands are too small to use one.

Getting past our president for my own sanity, the episode also has really great subplots: Muscle Man and Fives go to a sports bar to get sides and end up pissing off a former football player and getting into a touchdown dance comppetition, sadly not set to the super bowl shuffle, while Benson, Pops and Skips go to get a turkey and end up fighting over it with men dressed up like a piligrim, a first thanksgiving era native american and a turkey, to which they don’t even really give an explination for.. granted most explinatoins on this show are insane but even by regular show standards, this gets none. And I love it for it. While as you can tell the episode is really damn funny, what really sells it is the emotional core: For once while they do fear for their jobs a bit Mordecai and Rigby’s main motivation in this messup is genuine guilt and wanting to fix their mistake, and they work hard at it, even giving a genuine and awesome heartfelt song that notches itself up with other thanksgiving classics “That thankstiginv themed soul sketch on snl” and adam sandler’s turkey song also from snl. Not a high bar but it’s really good regardless

The episodes’ real strength though is it’s emotional core: For once instead of saving their own asses or understadnably wanting to get one over on the cranky and in the worse written episodes obnoxiously overbearing benson, they simply feel terrible about possibly runing the meal for their arriving parents and everyone elses parents and families and their friends and work to right the wrong. It’s not the first time they worked to do something genuinely good with no benefit to themselves, but it’s probably the best and Benson’s I forgive you, while hilarious is also really sweet. And speaking of sweet

It ends on a really sweet and touching note, as Mordecai and Rigby, after escaping a blimp via a wish on a golden wishbone because of course, make it home to find the various weirdos the park crew met have brought them thanksgiving, and their parents will be there and we get a nice touching ending as the main duo get a well earned toast from Benson. Just an out and out amazing thanksgiving special and a good reminder of what the holiday means.

8. Trucker Hall of Fame (Season 3, Episode 37)

Moving on from Season 5 for a second, Season 3 was where the show really started to hit it’s stride to me. While Season 2 was a nice increase in quality from the sometimes choppy and heavy on “everyone is an asshole” comedy season 1, Season 3 was where the increased focus on the rest of the cast outside of our main duo balloned and what seeds of character were planted in season 2 beautifully bloomed. And this episode is one of the best examples of that. This one focuses on Muscle Man, who earlier on was basically the main duo’s rival alongside his buddy high five ghost, and kind of a dick. While “Kind of a dick” never left any discription of Mitch Sorenstein, this and previous episode muscle woman showed there was more to the goblin man than we thought. It’s also one of regular show’s few early mostly serious episodes and unlike the benson ones, again this list was tough don’t come at me with a machete, and realy showed why muscle man is the human tire fire he is. The episode introduces, and quickly kills off, muscle dad, mitch’s dad who gave him a love of pranks and was a truck driver who died as he live: mistaking a fake bear for a real one during a prank. Muscle Man being not the most stable person on a GOOD day, spirals, as seen above, and Benson tasks mordecai and rigby, since Fives isn’t good with death ironically and isn’t holding up much better, and as a much later episode shows the two became besties in high school so he probably knew muscle dad for a good ten years so he’s probably not in a great place either, nice stuff, to go with him to put his dad’s ashes in the trucker hall of fame. What follows is a sweet and damn sad episode. While Mitch’s frequent breakkdowns can be hilarous their also really sad and having lost my grandpa since this episode aired, I can relate to being fine one minute and a total shrieking wreck the next over the smallest thing. But it also shows that Mitch genuinely thinks of our main duo as his friends, and that beneath his testorrone positned exterior he’s a decent guy, being genuinely greatful. Of course being regular show the 3 end up squaring off with some truckers, while Mitch also grappels with the revelation his dad wasn’t one but a forklift opperator who faked being a trucker for his son’s benifit and dleft a tender note in his picture, figuring correctly his son would break it open when he found out... oh and because this show is still nuts his ghost ends up saving them at the end which is really sweet , as mitch decides trucker or no his ashes deserve to be there. Also his ghost shows up again at thanksgiving so apparently he can just come back once in a while, which is nice but dosen’t demnish the bittersweet feeling of this ep. And as I said the show has a good grasp on continuity as this ep marked a turning point for our main duo and muscle man: while the’yve bonded before after this, aside from mitch’s habit of christmas pranks and his faking his death, they really don’t nearly get as annoyed by him ever again. i’ts a sweet touching ride tha’ts uncharacristic of the show’s usual chaos but really works.

7. A Bunch of Full Grown Geese (Season 4, Episode 19) After a few episodes that were more sentimental on this list, it’s good to get back to some good old regular show madness for this one, which was also the series 100th in production order and is a worthy milestone episode. Season 4 was really good building on the good will from Season 3 and FINALLY having payoff to the margret and mordecai thing, more on that in a bit. Not as much to say as seasons 3 or 5, but it was still spectacular. The sequel to another ep, fittingly given it’s #100, full grown geese has our duo tasked with removing a bunch of obnoxious geese, with Benson in dick mode refusing to give the two more help, though it does lead to one of the show’s best scenes when he gives his usual your fried threat.. and fitting a milestone episode, Rigby calls him on never going through with it and the threat being as empty as my dreams. Benson responds by going nuts and angrishing them out of his office.. really funny. But yeah with the geese attacking them and , in their first attacking, poor pops, and no way to combat them, the two turn to the baby ducks, a bunch of baby ducks from the episode titled that who show up to help.. and this being the 100th episode of an already grant morrison level nuts show, it turns out the geese seek to conquer earth, voiced by david warner of course and have laser eyes.. and can combine. And the ducks do so again, mecha style, and add in our heroes and a bunch of call backs in one of the series best and most batshit sequences> The ending is also throughly satisfying as while our heroes win, Benson chews them out for tearing up the park in the process.. only for the ducks mom to call him out for not only yelling at the ducks, who are just kids, but at mordecai and rigby after they just saved the park from being a smoldering crater and not just trashed and he backs off. Just a fun episode where the crew just went nuts and the results speak for themselves.

6. This is My Jam (Season 2, Episode 13)

Now this one I couldn’t NOT include. This is one of the series best even after it’s immense growth, and a beloved classic for a reason. And like the above it’s a good classic case of regular show hyjinks while also being relatable this time: Rigby gets a brainless but catchy pop song from the 90′s stuck in his head and despite growing to hate it, and Mordecai hating it because this episode establishes him as a hipster, and seemingly exercises it.. only for it to manifest as a GIANT CASETTE WEARING SUNGLASSES THAT PLAYS THE SONG JUST BY EXISTING AND DANCES CONSTANTLY. it’s utterly glorious and used to great effect, also annoying benson because he’s constnatly annoyed. To beat it the main duo get the rest of the park’s help at Skips suggestion to form a band and craft an even BIGGER earworm to cast it out. Oh and there’s a great scene where Pops is forced to awkwardly dance with the incarnation of the 90′s “But I won’t use my best moves”. The climax also has one of Benson’s best moments as, after he’s irritated all episode, he comes in hot, with both the cast and audience expecting him to chew out mordecai and rigby.. only he’s mad because they forgot drums are key to an earworm and saves the day with his drumwork. It’s a great subversion and one of the first times Benson was more than just the angry but understandable, at times, dickhead boss. Just an utter standout and one of the show’s most memorable episodes for a reason. Also the line “you can’t touch music but music can touch you’ is great.

5. Meteor Moves ( Season 4, Episode 28)

This one was a long time coming and to me is a great example of writers taking their own shortcomings and making something awesome out of them. I prefer that: instead of just retconning away bad writing use it as a tool.. I try to do that myself when possible. See early in the show as you all probably know, Mordecai’s crush on Margret was just a plot device: he had a crush on the cute waitress at the coffee shop so they used it to get him to do things. A gratioutis shot of her in bike shorts got him to bet all computer rights for life that sort of thing. The show.. wasn’t great with female characters till season 3 and even as it grew, as season 6 and just.. forgetting to give CJ a proper ending as a character shows, still grappled with it. It took writer Kat Morris saying “no no stop go to jail” to them wanting ot make CJ a difficult woman type, whatever horrifying thing that is. I don’t want to know, let’s move on. The point is it wasn’t till season 3 that Margret and her best friends, and Rigby’s future wife, Eileen got fleshed out a bit: Eileen got smarter and turned out to be good at wilderness stuff while Margret was chill, nice, if annoyed by the chaos around mordecai, and funloving, while also having a clear goal in stark contrast to her future boyfriend: going to college. Even after coming back it was botha fter finsihing college and to start a career. It wasn’t incredibly deep, but it made me not be ehhh to her mere existance like before. The show also started developing her and Mordecai’s relationship seriously with the two bonding and the previously shown Butt Dial showing for the first time, after previously having a terrible taste in men and then just not noticing his crush, that she was receptive to how mordecai felt. And the two had several moments and two dates even, it just.. never went anywhere for some reason.

And this was INFURATING to me: See back then shows had a tendency to just pop in love intrests SOLEY for plot fuel like margret with no intention of following through with things either through rejection or a relationsihp upgrade and by then I was sick of it. The whole spike and rarity thing in MLP (which to be clear I wanted her to just reject him but nope, even after I stopped watching she never did. ), Isabella and Phineas. I was fed up so I went from being “eh” about it to annoyed supremely.. but the thing is the writers realized this.. and course corrected. The first step was picking up Margret, where Mordecai agrees to pick her up to get her to the airport for a college interview and we get a nice deconstruction of things as Margret is anticpatiing things going wrong, and wrongly blames Mordecai for it.. I mean it is his fault sometimes but half the time weird shit just follows him. However she’s won over by him working past it, getting her there in time and kisses him. That blew me away and made me think well it’s finally here.. and it was.. ALMOST. However the creators wisely, if frustratingly to past me, took one more episode to iron it out: Metor Moves has the two growing closer, and semi-going out, but Rigby pops mordecai’s bubble pointing out he never actually made a boyfriend girlfriend move and her move could’ve gone either way. So Mordecai , after seasons of being wishy washy and awkward, finally decides to go for it as he, rigby, eileen and margret go to a metor shower. Being Regular Show it dosen’t go as planned as his attempted kiss is blocked by the guardians of the friend zone.. which is a real, phantom zone esque place here and that’s just fantastic. And it’s also clearly mocking the hell out of the concept, which is dumb. if you want to ask someone out just do it, I learned that the hard way. And if you really are friends, if she says no then you’ll accept it and keep a friend anyway as I have. But it’s clearly parodying it and Mordecai get sreplayed all the times he ALMOST made a move but didn’t but refuses to accept this clusterfuck, realizes he was a screwup when it came to this.. and kisses her.. and this time the two enter a relationship> Granted it barely lasted but still, it was nice while it did and this ep is just great for it. While not the funniest, it’s up this high because it took somethign the show did wrong.. and turned it on it’s head and into a character flaw and had mordecai grow past it, with a genuinely romantic moment on top as well as an utterly funny and batshit concept. It also had some Rigleen, as by this point rigby stopped being a hateful wastebasket to her and warmed up to her, and I regret there’s no reigleen episodes on this list. Their the shows best couple and utterly adorable. Just wanted to mention that at least once this list.

4. Laundry Woes (Season 5, Episode 1) From the begining to the end. While sadly Morderet didn’t last too long in canon, which blows, it did give us some great episodes while it lasted, as with the above entry and their breakup in Steak Me Amedeus. As mentioned before Margret left for college, which while abrupt feeling did pave the way for great stories: The Mordejay arc mentioned above and that will pop up again very soon, This was one of them: the ep while lacking on laughs is a good emotional rollercoaster and starts with an amazing montage that catches us up from the end of season 4: Mordecai is miserable, as you’d expect and wallowing in it with Benson, of all people, letting him. And given Benson seems to have a heart attack any time Mordecai and Rigby aren’t working, that’s huge. But eventually his friends refuse to let it go on and in a really touching montage help him through it, taking him out places, giving him good times and eventually.. the fog starts to lift and he starts to enjoy himself and by the end.. he’s himself again. It’s one of the series best sequences, told with no dialouge and showing just how far the rest of the cast had come: Benson actually wants to comfort mordecai but is encouraged not to at first, underfstandably as it probably woudlnt’ help, and a crew that were once, aside from Pops who much like Krillin is everyone’s friend, just coworkers who barely tolerated each other, and are now close as family and help their own in need. But Grief isn’t a straight line and just as Mordecai’s recovering he’s sent spiraling when he finds Margret’s sweater and uses ita s a flimsy excuse to go return it. It’s here I also get to talk about Rigby, who grew from an impatient idiot who hated Mordecai’s romantic endevors and actively sabtoaged them at times, to an understandting wing man who, while understandably frustrated with his best friend’s own idiocy with women, turned out to know more and be the wise council he needed, triggering both is relationships and only bailing out during the season 6 clusterfuck and even then was there to comfort him after it was all over and go to his aid to pull him out of another misery hole. And here he gives Mordecai the hard truth: He shoudln’t do this, it’s just going to tear both him and margret up again and he just put himself back together. He’s not going to let his best friend do this to himself. And while there is a supernatural elment, the sweater comes to life and tries to get Mordecai to force margret back with him and give up college, likely voicing his darkest wants that he hates himself for wanting, but it feels more like a manfiestation of Mordecai’s own issues than the usual madness. Like “Trucker hall of Fame”, a rare senntence, it’s a less funny packed more grounded episode. And in the end it’s mordecai himself, after rejecting the ghost sweater and seeing his ex truly happy , that gets him to NOT talk to her and just.. let it go. IT’s a good emotional episode and SHOULD HAVE BEEN the end of their relationship... but i’ve ranted about the cheating storyarc enough here, moving right along.

3. Portable Toilet (Season 5, Episode 16) Back to the Mordejay arc. And yes this arc is my faviorite and while I didn’t make it clear at the time I really shipped the two, even before it became canon. I had nothing against morderet, these two simply had more chemistry and these episodes built CJ up as more of a character than Margret was at the time. It’s why that later arc sucks so much to me: it destroys a perfectly good relationship and story arc for dumb reasons and never really did enough with it to justify doing so. I’ll get to it some day, or if someone comissions it soone rthan some day, but as you can tell i’m still sore over it and great eps like this are part of the reason why. It’s the same reason i’m sore on how Tom was handled on star vs. But as you can also tell as bitter and lemon scented as I am.. these eps are still objectivley great and thus took up a third of the list basically. Case in point Portable Toilet, which zooms back a bit to when neither would admit they were into each other but were now friends at least. Also Eileen was CJ”s friend now because plot convience. I mean they worked, and it bothers me a lot that the creators claim cj washed her hands of her even though she’s not the one who made out with margret... which come to think of it adding her to rigleen.. not a bad idea. I mean Rigby didn’t really like margret true, but they did almost go out before mordecai killed him and then reset time because Mordecai’s always kinda sucked. I’ll file that away for later. But my new OTP aside, I did like the two bonding and what not. Anyways with their outside park friend/RIgby’s future girlfriend now friends with Mordeai’s future girlfriend the four have apparently been hanging out which, while i’ve bemoaned off screen stuff at times, works here and regular show uses it better than most shows. While Rigby can clearly see Mordecai and CJ are into each other Mordecai is as we covered in denial and while that dosen’t really progress here, it does lead to one of teh shows finest hours. When talking would you rathers, CJ semi-flirtly dares Mordecai to eat his lunch sandwitch in a portable toilet, which he agrees to and drags a reluctant rigby along for. This being regular show, it goes south fast as the two get stuck, with Rigby’s clautrophiba kicking in leading to an amazing exchange Mordecai; Dude that makes no sense! Rigby: You’s makes no sense! While our dynamic duo try to get mordecai and rigby out the two are carted away and repalced with a new portable toilet, a deluxe one. Also we get another great bit when our dynamic duo find Muscle man, in a robe with choclate’s claming “Eileen, other girl, this isn’t weird” before screaming “This isn’t weird”. Turns out old portable toilets are taken to be blown up by the miltary and we get one of the shows best one off characters in the general, who not only explains it as “toilets being about the same size as the enmy” but when told he should call the president says “the preseident is not my father i’ll blow up as many toilets as I want.”. Spectacular. So now it’s a scramble for one twosome to rescue the other, Rigby lets out a cathartic “THANK YOUUU MORDECAI” over the flirty toilet dare, and the day is saved> This one is another pure comedy one, even if it ties into a plot I really like, and i’ts gold for obvious reasons and manages to take blowing up porta poties, a premise that dosen’t seem that funny, and make it utter comedic gold. Speaking of pure comic episodes that are utterly insane...

2. Cool Bikes (Season 3, Episode 7)

This one feels like regular show boiled down to it’s core: semi-relabtale hyjinks dovetalling into pure madness. And the premise sounds like a shit post i’d make: Mordecai and Rigby want benson to admit their cool and get into progressively weird outfits and tricks to their bycycles to do so, eventually becoming so cool their put on trial by the council of cool , ending up having to make a runner when Benson finally breaks down and admits it. The premise is utterly stupid in the best way possible, with the conflict being the kind of petty bullshit we all get into from time to time with our aquantinces: not wanting to admit something and loose the argument withthings escalating. And in regular show terms it escalate sperfectly into the entire unvierse being threatned adn our heros being on trial for their lives. There’s not much to say here, it’s just pure comedic gold with a premise that just works. It also has good moments for Benson with his finally admitting they are cool and saving the duo’s lives whne he realized he just gave them a death sentence. Utter fun. And now we come to the finale, my faviorite episode...

1. Dodge This (Season 5, Episode 15)

Yup this arc again. But this one has more than my ship going for it, and it’s why it soared to the top: It takes the excellent character work of other episodes and weaves it with excellent comedy to create an utter delight and the episode I remember most fondly and most often. It’s just great. The second part of the Mordeijay arc, not counting yes dude yes, the episode is half that and half sports movie: The Park Guys have been taking part in dodgeball as a team bulding thing and it shows how far Benson’s come as he not only praises mordecai, and launches the mordecai and benson ship in the process, but gives his team full wings and his full support, a far cry from his usual self. It’s also the first big instance of him getting hammered on wings and it’s glorious to see drunk flirty benson. Benson is also genuinely congratulatory to the team’s ace mordecai, and most of them realy for b eing valuable and hopes to win this year. IN their way are two things: The magical elements, aka the floating baby heads that gave skips his immortality, his friend with sparkly eyes who works for them and death himself whose a recurring character and fucking great and who were their bowling rivals too. The other is CJ is back, and Benson in another good moment actually talks mordecai through it and his nerves over it assuring him. So we get a great sports piece as our heroes work through various callbacks and even beat the magical elements iwth Rigby’s hilarious and rediculous rignado manuver, which is as dumb as it sounds and winged a guy hilaroiusly before with Benson scolding him like a toddler. Of course it ends up with Mordecai and CJ against each other, both incredibly awkard over things as mentioned before, and both ending up in a stalmate that magical dodgeball guardians have to resolve because, let’s do this one last time. IT’S REGULAR SHOW. We do get a good moment though as the two work through their awkwardness: both thinking the other is rightfully mad: Mordecai for his two timer date with her and Margret and CJ for running out without talking to mordecai after they had a moment on new years. The both work past it, the park strikers loose,benson likely gets hammered again off screen.. it’s a good one and I have no shame in putting it at number one. It’s got heart, really great jokes, and some good charcter stuff, not to the level of other episodes on this list, but it wasn’t a full episode of that like those were and still works to move the plot forward and is still a classic. Just a fun, breezy, well done epsidoe fully rooted in the cast’s characters and getting laughs out of that.. mostly benson. And with that this giangantic list comes to a close> I hope you enjoyed it, if you liked it follow me for more. I’ll be doing close enough coverage every week, as well as amphibia and owl house among other reviews. Until we meet again, later days.

#regular show #mordecai #rigby #cj #eileen #margret #muscle man #benson dunwoody #high five ghost #pops mallerd #skips #death #yuji #rich fulcher #close enough #top 10 lists #cartoon network

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purplesurveys · 4 years

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Do you have a pair of Beat headphones? I used to have a pair. I mean it’s still around in my closet, but it’s completely broken now with the cable all given out and the cushion for the left ear has been missing for a while. I just don’t have the heart to throw it out because it was my absolute favorite pair of headphones that gave me good memories during a particularly shitty time in high school.

How was your week? A little better. I’ve gotten into the groove at work so I’m no longer shy when it comes to asking questions and giving inputs, and I’ve gained a better grasp of the workplace’s dynamic so it’s also been easier to communicate with people. Heavy life stuff is still around and it won’t be leaving for a while, but they were easier to ignore this week.

Are any of your electronics not working properly at the moment? Not really, but my phone’s charger cable recently stopped working. I have a backup that I’m using at the moment and while it’s able to charge my phone, it’s starting to fray and I’m not feeling too good about the wires that I’m starting to see hahaha. I just don’t know how to take care of my cables, guys. Anyway, this question made me paranoid so I took a few minutes to wrap a shit ton of electrical tape on the frayed area so I think it’s all good for now.

Are you excited to pick out your wedding dress one day? I like thinking about my wedding but I truthfully dread the wedding gown part. I’ve never been able to decide what look and style suits me best and I’ve just never been good at determining things like that. I like to imagine that I’d leave that bit to whoever my maid of honor will be, because I’d definitely prize a second opinion more than my own.

When was the last time you felt relieved? Yesterday, 6 PM when I exited the last Google Meet for the day. It was a Friday night and it meant my work week was over :)) I mean I love what I do, but Friday nights will always hit differently.

Does it bother you when an artist remakes a song that one has previously done? I wouldn’t say it bothers me but covers are definitely a hit or miss for me, with way more misses than hits. Nothing wrong with acts putting their own spin on an already existing song, but I’m personally the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” type when it comes to music.

What brand of chapstick do you use? I don’t use any mainly because I’m bound to lose them within a week. Same goes for other care products.

Do you really think someone could be perfect? No. Everyone has their flaws and that should be okay to acknowledge.

When was the last time you cried? Wednesday, I think. It’s been three days! I’d count that as an achievement. But idk, my sadness comes in waves so I shouldn’t be celebrating too early. I’m sure I’ll feel a pang soon and be crying again over the weekend.

What’s a food that you like every once in awhile but not often? Cake. Too sweet and rich; I wouldn’t enjoy eating it every day. What letter is the song you’re listening to under? Not listening to music, but I have a YouTube video on.

Would you rather visit the 60s or 70s? 60s would be the lesser evil, I guess. I would NOT want to live through Martial Law in the 70s...I originally wasn’t even going to go with 60s because I think the world was a bit chaotic at the time, but I think my country was mostly unaffected by the political/cultural things happening then so it’s whatever.

Are you the type of person that enjoys getting hugs? I don’t actively seek them out but it feels nice when someone likes me enough to extend their arms out to me for a hug. I haven’t been hugged for a while and I feel kinda empty.

Do your socks say anything on them? I think some of my socks have the brand name on them but that’s it.

Name a TV channel that only has three letters in it. AMC.

Have you found out who your true friends are? For now, yes.

Gray or Grey? I use both spellings for no particular context. I simply like changing it up lol.

Will you be buying concert tickets any time soon? LOL of course not. And I’m very picky when it comes to concerts that I choose to attend anyway, so I doubt I would’ve bought any tickets in the last six months even without Covid unless it was for Paramore or Beyoncé.

Have you seen the movie The Perks of Being a Wallflower? Did you like it? Nope, but everyone was hyping that movie up when it came out. It never really looked like my thing < Yeah pretty much. I feel like it’s such a teenage-y movie so I was never drawn to it. I also think it would be too triggering for my depression, so I’ve felt wary about checking both book and movie out.

Is there something you’d fall apart if you didn’t have? One of my biggest fears is to end up alone, so I always have to have some form of a support system to fall back into. I would be very lost if I didn’t have at least one person to rely on.

How many weddings have you been to? I can think of four off the top of my head. I was either a flower girl or a junior bridesmaid for all of those.

When you smile, are you confident? Most times I am; I like to smile. But sometimes I smile just to fake it and avoid any questions.

Have you ever not done something because you were afraid of getting in trouble? Yesss, all the time. I’ve always been all about following the rules and I’ve never seen the appeal in breaking them. That makes me sound boring but at least I’ve never gotten in serious trouble lol.

Was the weather beautiful today? For me it is, but only because I like the rain and cloudy weather. Others might find it bleak and sad, but I feel right at home.

Do you have to have a fan on when you sleep? Yeah, all year long.

Would you rather have an orange, red or gray bedroom? If I had my dream modern/brutalist home, grey would be soooo fucking perfect for the bedroom.

Would you ever dye part of your hair blue? I’m open to it, but I don’t think it’ll be a good match for my black hair as both are darker shades as it is. If I could dye my hair I’d pick lighter colors like green or even go all the way to blonde.

Have you ever gone to a private school? Yeah, from kindergarten all the way to high school. Private schools here typically give a better quality of education and they don’t give off the for-lazy-spoiled-kids vibe that I always hear from private schools in other countries, which makes them the norm for middle and upper-middle class families.

Is Finding Nemo a favorite movie of yours? I have other favorite animated movies, but that doesn’t stop me from loving Finding Nemo. :) I would always tune in for the whole thing if it were on.

Does/Did your school have a uniform? I had to wear one in my first school, but I didn’t need one for college.

Turn on the TV. What channel are you on? No TV where I am. I think my parents are watching a movie on their TV, but it’s on Netflix rather than a channel.

Does your house have security cameras? It does not.

Does a popsicle sound good right now? Eh, I guess it sounds fine but I’d rather have a pint of ice cream. I think that fits better with the weather and the mood that I’m in today.

What’s your favorite exercise workout? My weight training class last year was a lot of fun. I always felt dead after every session haha but I definitely felt healthier. I wish the semester had gone on longer just for that one class.

What’s your favorite thing to do? Lol I love doing many different things < Same lmao this question is so vague??? My favorite thing to do these days is binge-watch Rhett and Link content, but I like doing so many other things too.

What did you do for your 17th birthday? I was with Gabie that day and we went to a local art museum, as well as to a restaurant that she had wanted to take me to.

Does your local Walmart have benches in them to rest? We don’t have Walmarts.

Was your favorite stuffed animal really a teddy bear growing up? I never had stuffed animals. Well I was given a few of them as gifts, but I was never into them and they always ended up being owned by my sister.

If your house was haunted, what would you do? Not even think about it. Just show them that I couldn’t care less, lol.

Are you good at swimming? I can do a few strokes and am pretty good at treading, but I'm prone to panic-kicking when I can tell that the water is too deep.

What’s worse: Slow internet or slow walkers? Slow internet is such a pain in the ass. Shouldn’t even have to be an issue in 2020 anymore.

What is the rudest thing a guy has ever done to you? Cat-called, whistled at, winked at, lunged at. One good thing about this lockdown is that I haven’t had to deal with men as much as I used to. Do you sleep with the sheets tucked in or out? Well I only have one layer of bedsheet and it’s the one that covers up the mattress, so it’s tucked in by default. I have a blanket to cover me up when I’m cold.

What do you do to fall asleep faster? I find a few videos to watch as that tends to make me feel sleepy the quickest.

Do you carry a bottle of water wherever you go? I used to have a tumbler/water bottle in college but I forgot it at the gym one day and when I came back for it, somebody already stole it :( It was such a handy water bottle because it kept my water cold all day, so it sucks that I lost it. I’m planning to buy the same model again soon.

Are you afraid that one day you might get cancer? It doesn’t really run in my family save for one grand-aunt who had cancer, so I’m not too worried. But I’ve accepted the fact that it is at least a possibility.

Are you a fast or slow walker? I like being in the middle. Slow walkers are annoying so I try not to be one, and walking fast just reminds me of my mom and how quickly she walks at malls when she’s supposed to be spending time with her family lol.

Do you usually have to wear a belt with your pants? No. They all fit me just fine.

Does it bother you when people’s underwear hangs out? Eghhh, it really does. I know it shouldn’t but it really does. I just feel like it’s so invasive and it gives me a lot of secondhand embarassment.

Are you usually the person to try new things with your hair? Not really. I like staying safe with my hair. The most daring thing I’ve done with it is get bangs tbh, and I don’t plan on going any further than that.

When’s your birthday? April 21st.

What age do you look forward to reaching? I don’t feel that way about any age. Whenever I reach ultimate satisfaction and security will be a good enough age for me.

Name a state that begins with the letter M. Minnesota.

What’s the first thing you do after a car accident? Think about how to tell my parents. D:

What do you use to get rid of bad breath? Brush my teeth, drink water.

What exercise do you hate the most? Pull-ups.

What do you do at a party? Drink, socialize, tell stories, eat allllllll the food ha.

#survey #surveys

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lovemesomesurveys · 4 years

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What is a recurring thought on your mind today? lol it’s 5 in the morning and I’m thinking about getting more egg rolls for lunch. I had been craving them for awhile and finally had some last night and now I want more. Have you had any confrontations with anyone lately? No. What is the last charity you donated to? A cancer research charity. Do you feel all fuzzy and good when you do a good deed? It does feel good to do good. Don’t ya just hate foot cramps? I wouldn’t know, but I get stomach cramps and they’re not fun at all, so I imagine a foot cramp isn’t either.

Would you say you have an infectious laugh? I don’t think so. Shouldn’t you be doing something else right now? Sleeping, but c’mon when do I ever go to bed before 7 or 8AM anymore? Do you have anything planned for the summer? Couldn’t do anything this summer. I’m so glad we’re in August though and summer is almost overrrrrr. What is something you worry about often? Health related things. Constantly. Are there any mountains nearby where you live? No. Did you like to collect frogspawn as a kid? No. Do you walk fast or slow? I’m a fast wheeler I’m told. Do you keep birthday cards or throw them out? I keep them. I don’t get very many anymore, though. Would you consider yourself healthy? Both mind and body. Nope, not in any way. Do you play any team sports? Nope. If so, which position do you play? - Does sitting in waiting rooms drive you insane? Yes. I’m very impatient and the waiting just makes me more anxious. What form of public transport do you use most often? I don’t take any public transportation anymore, but I used to take the bus sometimes in college. Would you consider yourself an adrenaline junkie? Ha, no. Do you ever go onto ‘failblog’? I’m not familiar with that. Have you ever been arrested? If so, why? No. Do you ever put sticky notes around the place to remind yourself of things? No. I use the reminder app on my phone and/or write it down on my marker board. Would you eat a spider for $50? Absolutely NOT. Nopeeeeeee. Would you rather be a kangaroo or a koala? Koala, I guess. What is a common slang word from where you live? ”Hella” used to be a very Californian thing, but everyone says it now so I don’t know. Do you keep your fingers on the home keys when you type? I don’t type the proper way. I’ve been on the computer and typing since I was a kid, I even took a typing class, but I still don’t type the proper way haha. How I type works for me, though, sooo. *shrug* Are you easy to talk to? People have told me that. Can you juggle with more than two items? I can’t juggle. I couldn’t even tell you the last time I tried to juggle. Has anyone ever assumed you can’t speak English? No, but people have assumed that I speak Spanish. Do you live in a rural or an urban area? Urban. At airports do you ever worry your luggage won’t arrive? It crossed my mind. Do your parents ever call you ‘pet’ or ‘sweetheart’ etc? Not those two specifically, but other terms of endearment. We have our own that we’ve made up for each other as well. If so, does it annoy you? No, not at all. Do you like jalapenos? I loved ‘em, but I can’t eat spicy food anymore. :( What other windows have you currently got opened? Just this one. What woke you up this morning? I haven’t gone to bed, yet, but when I get up it’ll be well past morning. I don’t even go to bed until the morning. :/ Who else is in the same building as you? My parents, brother, and doggo are home as well. Would you like a penny farthing bicycle? A what? Your name? Stephanie. Would you ever consider visiting Ireland? Sure. Would you like to visit Venice? Yes. Did you ever eat leaves when you were a kid? Uh, no. I wasn’t the kid who played in leaf piles or played with/ate dirt or anything. What is the largest body of water near your hometown? California is near the Pacific. Do you have any flags in your house? Yes. Are there any ‘keep off the grass’ signs where you live? Not in my neighborhood that I know of, but yeah some public places in town do. Have you ever walked on the grass with such a sign? No. Are you double-jointed? My thumbs are. At school which area of science did you prefer: biology/chemistry/physics? I managed to get by in science, but it wasn’t my favorite. Which did you prefer between geography/history? History. Have you ever had a main part in a play? No. Are there any musical instruments in the room you’re in? No. Can you name a difference between RNA and DNA? Uhhh. I’m blanking. Do you know anyone who owns a farm? No. Have you ever driven a tractor? No. Does the smell of the countryside bother you? It’s quite pungent, ha. I guess if you live out there you get used to it, but anytime I drive through the country I just gag. Do you drink more water or juice? Water. I don’t drink juice at all.

Sweater weather or tank top weather? Which do you prefer. Sweater weather, most definitely. Have you ever kissed a Zachary? No. Do you hate when people try to embarrass you? Uh, well yeah. Do you like in October when a bunch of haunted places open up? I don’t go to any, but yeah. I just love spooky season in general. Did you tell someone you loved them today? Not so far. Do you watch the show Ghost Adventures? No. My dad watches it, though, so I’ve seen parts of it here and there. What color are your curtains in your bedroom? Dark blue. Are you superstitious? I do the knock on wood thing, but I think that’s really just out of habit. Is there a cat in the room you’re in right now? No, I don’t have a cat. What’s your favorite thing to do on the weekend? I don’t do anything different from weekdays. All my days are the same. Do you have your license? No. Do you still watch cartoons? I still watch Rugrats, Doug, and Hey Arnold. And animated movies. Do you like to cook? Only ramen. Do you drink? Nope. Do you smoke? Nope. Where do you buy your clothes? Hot Topic, Boxlunch, Adidas website, and Kohl’s. Do you enjoy going to the movies? Yes. I miss being able to go. Are you still in school? Nopeeee, I’m done. Do you like cupcakes? Yes.

What makes you sad? A lot of things. I’m also just a sad, sleepy, sensitive soul as I like to say. Are you an animal lover? Yes. Are you hot-headed? I’m not quick to anger, but I do get irritated and frustrated quite easily. Do you have any siblings? I have 2 brothers. Are you afraid of snakes? YES. Do you have any pets? Yes, I have a doggo. <3 What color are your eyes? Brown. How bout your hair? I dye it red, but it’s naturally dark brown. How tall are you? Like 5′4. Who do you live with? My parents, brother, and doggo. Is there anything you want to ask anyone right now? No. Do you have kids? No. Do you love your family? Yes. They’re my world. What color hair do you prefer on the gender of your choice? I don’t really care. How bout eye color? Blue and green eyes are gorgeous. Do you have a job? If so, what? No. What is your dream job? I don’t have one. :/ What did you “wanna be” when you were a little kid? A teacher. What’s your favorite kind of movie? Psychological thrillers, horror, drama, romcoms, comedy, some action/adventure, /sci-fi... I like a variety. Are you gay, straight, bi, lesbian, asexual, or not sure? Straight. What kind of music is your favorite? I like variety. Do you play any instruments or sing? What kind? No. Have you ever been to a concert? If so, what was your favorite one? Yeah, several. I enjoyed them all, concerts are just awesome. It’s a cool experience. Are you more negative or more positive? Negative. Well, for myself. I can be positive for others. Have you ever been depressed? I have chronic depression. How are you feeling, dear? Tired and crappy. Mhm and how’s the weather where you’re at? It’s 6AM and it’s already 64F. Okay and have you been healthy lately? No. Are you in middle school, high school, college, graduate? I’m done with school. What is/was your favorite class? English was always my favorite and then in college I was able to take psych courses, which is also what I majored in, so I liked those. Have you made any life altering decisions lately? No. Where is your favourite place to get pizza? This local place.

Do you have any physical traits that are bothering you lately? My hair.

What is the closest store to you? A grocery store. Do you have any songs currently stuck in your head? Not at the moment. Have you made a CV? No. I had to Google what a CV was. Where is the last place you applied for a job? (If you have) I haven’t. Are you photogenic? Nope. Are there any concert venues where you live? Yes. Are you annoyed at anyone these days? I’m always annoyed with myself. Which continent would you most like to travel to and why? Europe. There’s a ton of places I’d like to visit. Have you ever/would you ever do volunteer work? I’ve done a lot of volunteer work. Do you know anyone that has died in a road accident? No. Do you know which career path you want to follow? No. Are there a lot of tourists where you live? No. There’s not shit to do or see of interest here. My state is a touristy state, though. Any plans for your next birthday? This year I obviously just stayed home, but my family made it nice. My brother got me coffee, breakfast, and a coffee cake from my favorite place, my mom, brother, and I watched this new creepy movie, You Should Have Left, then we just hung out until dinnertime, which was my fave, Wingstop, and then I opened presents.

Do you have to use public transport often? Not at all anymore, but when I was in college I had to take the bus sometimes. Does your house have an alarm? Yes. Have you ever asked someone out on a date? No. Whose grave did you last visit? My dog, Brandie, is buried in our backyard. My dad made a really nice gravesite for her. What’s something someone can do that makes you melt? A guy that can play the piano. What are you listening to right now? An ASMR video If you won a lot of money on the lottery, what would you buy first? The first thing after paying off debts would be a new house for my family and I. What’s your greatest fear? Death, disease, bugs, clusters. <<<< SAME. Gaaaaah the last one just made my skin crawl from seeing the word. Those are just a few of many fears for me. Has anyone upset you in the last week? Yes. What’s the best thing about you? I like my cheesy, corny sense of humor. What’s your favorite drink? Coffee. What are you going to do tomorrow? Same stuff I do everyday. What are you craving? I want more egg rolls like I had last night. How did you sleep last night? I don’t ever feel like I slept well. I never wake up feeling well rested. Does that really happen for people cause I can’t relate.

What was the first thing you thought this morning? I haven’t gone to bed, yet.

If your favorite food gave you pain, made you have acne, etc., would you still eat it? I’d just have to eat it less often and less of it. Unless it made me really sick or something or was very intense and unpleasant. Like I can’t have spicy food at all anymore except for the weak hot sauce that has like less than 2% of anything, but even that I can only have a little bit of. I can’t drench my food in it, just light dips. It sucks cause I used to be obsessed with spicy food, and I used to eat really spicy stuff.

Have you ever been judged on something you wore? Yeah.

Are you a timid person? Yes.

Think QUICK what word begins with c? Coffee!

Are you a funny person? I think I have my funny moments and now and then and trust me, when they happen I make sure to own ‘em cause they’re rare haha. Be honest, do you go for looks more or personality? Personality is the most important, looks only go so far. Personality goes on a much deeper level and who a person is matters a lot more to me than their looks. That being said, I can’t say looks don’t matter at all. I also want to add that a good personality can add to someone’s attractiveness.

Ever been so upset but didn’t understand why? Yeah. I get these moody moods that are sometimes triggered, but there’s a lot of times where they seem to just come on out of nowhere. I suppose it’s the depression, but like I can be having a decent day and then suddenly I’ll feel my mood changing and nothing in that moment changed that would seem to cause the sudden change. I just feel it coming on and once it does, I can’t stop it. My emotions very much control me.

Are you a flirty person? No. I can be if I’m interested in someone and I’m comfortable around them enough to be flirty. Though, it’s probably subtle.

Are you homophobic? No.

Ever had a rumor spread about you? No.

Has anyone ever pulled your pants down in public? Nooo.

Ever had the ‘birds and the bees’ talk with your parents? Yeah.

How would you react if someone said you ruined their life? Wow. I would feel extremely bad and shitty to say the least.

Are you a sympathetic person? Yes. I’m also very empathetic.

Ballet dance or hip hop dance? If I could, I would have tried hip hop. What’s currently bothering you right now? My stomach.

What is the most athletic you’ve done? When I had to participate in my adaptive PE classes. That’s literally the only time.

Do you remember the first conversation you ever had with the person you currently have feelings for? I don’t have those kinds of feelings for anyone at the moment.

Do you like to drink herbal tea? Yeah, now and then. I’m not a big tea drinker.

If you’re home alone, do you still close/lock the door when you use the bathroom? No.

What your favorite thing to have on toast? Butter.

Has anyone ever hung up on you? Yeah, but only like telemarketers and wrong numbers.

Have you ever been to a concert? Several. Hasn’t this come up a couple times? Maybe I’m getting the surveys confused, I’m tired.

Can you speak more than one language? If so, what other language(s)? Not fluently, just some Spanish.

Are you talking to anyone right now? No.

If so, how do you feel about them? -

Do you know anyone who skateboards? Not anymore.

Do you ever sing when you’re alone? Yeah.

What’s the stupidest song you’ve listened to today? I have’t listened to any stupid songs. I don’t listen to music I’d consider stupid. Are you listening to music, currently? No.

How do you feel about the song? - When someone teases you do you frown or give an amazing comeback? My family and I playfully tease each other and sometimes I’ll come up with something funny and clever to say, but there’s times where I’m just like -____- and say like, “har-har very funny” haha or something lame like that. Do you think you can sing? I know I can’t sing well at all, but I still like to anyway to myself.

Do you have any talent? No.

Do you think you’re better looking than some other people? No.

Do you like dancing? I like head bobbing and moving my shoulders/arms/hands, ha. And sometimes I attempt (very badly) to do some TikTok dances haha. Privately, though. I’d never recored myself and share it with the public, major yikes.

What’s your favorite zoo animal? Giraffes.

How is your hair currently styled? It’s up in a messy bun.

How long are your showers (on average)? Like 30-40 minutes.

East or West? West.

What did you do last night? Binged some Step by Step on Hulu until 1AM-ish, then I made my ramen and watched some YouTube videos while I ate, then I played some Animal Crossing for a bit, and then I scrolled through Tumblr for awhile, and then I did some surveys and listened to ASMR, which is what I’m still doing now.

Do you like your music loud? I like it at a comfortable volume. Some songs I have a little louder than others, just depends.

What are you allergic to? Tangerines. I also have seasonal allergies.

Do you ever stay up late just to be awake I have insomnia, but yeah I do stay up later than I should. Like, I could attempt sleep a little sooner than I do.

What do you want to name your children? I don’t want to have kids.

Would you ever write a letter to someone you haven’t met yet, like your future spouse? Nah.

Did the last movie you watched make you cry? No. It was a psychological thriller, it was trippy.

Are you a good swimmer? Nope, I can’t swim.

What are you always thinking about? Health stuff.

Is science your favorite subject? Well, psychology is a science. When you’re really worked up, what do you do to relax? Listen to ASMR.

Would you rather spend the day watching movies or on an intense hike? Uh, watching movies. Definitely. I can’t go hiking anyway, but I wouldn’t want to do anything intense or outdoors.

Did you ever try the cereal Special K? Yeah, there’s nothing special about it.

Think of the last person you kissed, was it memorable? Yeah.

You have the choice of being poor but happy, or rich but miserable. Which is it? Poor and happy.

Do you think girls with short hair are less good looking than those with long hair? Uh, no? There’s a lot of beautiful people with short hair and there’s a lot of beautiful people with long hair.

#personal #text #survey #surveys #long survey

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moccahobi · 6 years

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Hot And Cold [Jungkook x Reader] College AU!

Summery: Cheesy pick up lines. Generally they’re used by someone suave and cool, but what happens when the person using them just seems to fail time and time again to be anything but a stuttering mess?

“Fat penguin!” Jungkook shouted at you, his large build putting you in shadow as his cheeks grew a deep red color.

“What did you call me?” You asked, more confused than anything as this model-looking man started to stutter out an answer, his face paling by the second, “I-I-I don’t m-me-mean to say t-that you’re fat. N-no! I- A fat p-pen-penguin would break the i-ice… I wanted t-to ta-- nevermind. B-bye.” He stuttered out before bolting out of your college’s courtyard. You stayed sitting in your chair with a friend from your Philosophy and Star Trek class, stunned. Who ever that was… you’ve never seen someone change so suddenly.

“What just happened?” You tried to laugh awkwardly but instead a strangled grunt came out as you curled up into a ball on the lawn chair.

“I-I don’t know, but I… I don’t know… I’ll have to see.” Namjoon mumbled, “I will say, I’ve never seen Jungkook act like that.”

“Wait- that’s Jungkook? I always thought that from you guys had described him he was like a prepubescent baby.” You said, shocked that that god-like man was the “prick” who always cancel last minute when it came to movie marathons with you.

“That’s how we see him, but he’s only one grade below us, remember that as well.”

“You see this shirt?! It’s boyfriend material!” He randomly blurted out at you when you opened your apartment door to the four boys joining you and your roommate for the Mexican telenovela marathon (as part of your plan to watch a ton of different genres from around the world) before shoving past you and curling up in a ball on the couch, neck beet red.

“Don’t mind him, Y/n-ah… he’s still in the stage where he thinks girls have cooties.” Jimin smiled broadly, patting you on the back before making a b-line to our kitchen pantry where he knew you had stored spicy ramen and cheese just for him.

“I found this one movie called Coco! It’s by Pixar and it’s bound to be great!” Hoseok shouted as he set the dvd down on the tv stand.

“Awww… I’m sorry, Hoseok-sshi, but that’s an American animation. Telenovelas are like noon k-dramas with better cinematography and a worse plot and they’re in spanish. Besides, we already have enough, but let’s save that for the animation’s of America, k?” Your roommate, Jae-eun, sang as she curled into the rocking chair with your only fluffy blanket.

“But I rented it!!!”

“Then we’ll just have to watch it tomorrow morning when we get breakfast, eh?” You asked, dragging a bean bag from your room and sitting down close to the tv.

“How can you sit so close to the tv, Y/n? It seriously makes no sense. I mean haven’t you ever heard of the wives tale that it’ll ruin your eyesight?” Jin scolded, rubbing your head roughly as you laughed.

“Eh. They call ‘em wives tales for that exact reason. They’re fake. Now… let’s see if Eduardo gets MARIA AND IF MARIA GETS WITH EDWARDO’S BROTHER-”

“What the hell are telenovelas!?”

“This is the first episode! I DON’T KNOW!”

You were late to bowling. You had promised to be there on time, but one thing lead to another and your lab partner for chemistry took an extra hour to complete the paper YOU WROTE MOST OF. You bumped into the front desk well aware that you most likely looked like a cracked out crazy person as you gasped for air as somehow wheezed out your shoe size. Before you knew it you were slowly walking over towards your friends when you noticed something, “Yeah! Our Jungkookie is too good to be competing against us!” “He really should join the bowling club!” “With this skill he could probably beat a good dad!” “If only he was this good with girls!”

“Just you wait!” Jungkook said, a splitting grin on his face, “Soon my skills will be better than Jimin’s butt!” He caroled as you got closer

“Jungkook-ah, no thing is better looking than Jimin’s butt.” You joked, winking at the boy as you sloughed on the seat and started to fix your hair.

“Then you clearly haven’t looked in the mirror lately!” He suddenly yelled, eyes bugging out of his head as he dropped to bowling ball onto his foot before howling in pain.

“A-are you ok?” You raced up to him, grabbing his shoulder and trying to look him straight in the eye, deciding to ignore the comment he made earlier as your soon-to-be, hopefully med student kickin in.

“I-I-I… yeah.”

“Maybe we should just have Y/n over every time we bowl with our Jungkookie! He can’t do squat around her!”

You were silently working in a cafe near you, computer battery at halfway just like your now lukewarm coffee when a large crash came from right in front of you. Your head shot up, heart racing, when your eyes landed on the one and only Jeon Jungkook, who every. single. time you’ve tried to talk to him or even are in the same general space as him he spits out some stitty pickup line before freezing up… it’s been an entire semester now, and halfway through you just tried to ignore him because while he might look like he was carved from stone by Michelangelo, he has no manners at all and you’ve never able to get more than two words in.

“See?!? I’ve scraped my knees falling for you!” He blurted out for the entire cafe to hear, eyes soft and face now a light shade of pink as he scrambled over to you and shrunk as much as he could into the chair in front of you.

“What the actual fuck? I know you’re socially awkward around me or something, but please don’t blurt that stuff out so randomly. It’s weird.” You cried, head falling loosely onto your laptop.

“I-I-I-I… sorry. I-I you’re ju-- just so pretty and cool wh-when my hyungs talk to you and… and I kinda got a cr-crush on you-- b-but it’s like… I’ve never talked to someone as cute as you and-- fuck what am I saying.” At this you lifted your head up slightly to look at him, eyes tired and mind slow from finals.

“What did you just say?”

“I-I have a c-crush on you?”

“Well shit! Why haven’t you asked me out yet?” You blurt out, straighten up and laughing quietly.

“I have tried to but… I’ve always chickened out. Wait-- would say yes if I did?”

“Of course! Have you looked in the mirror? Plus, from what I saw at the bowling alley, when you aren’t freezing up, you’re quite hilarious… plus I might have stalked your social medias after we first met.”

“Well then close your computer! This is our first date!”

If you liked this, check out my other work here!

Sooo... my second one is out! I hope to keep up this schedule for now! Wish me luck!

I want to say before anything else, that I have a writer’s account on another site so if you see these on Quotev by someone of the same name, that IS me. Anyone one else and no!

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masslessobtrusion · 3 years

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Yikes, This is the kind of shit I send to Arielle. I was freaking out. I am very distraught and worried. Scared. I think I might die. How else am I supposed to feel? I have no one to calm me down. I am left to make assumptions as to why. It’s a summary of what the last week or so has looked like. I don’t even know if I feel like this or if my brain is searching for answers because of how I feel like something is seriously wrong with my physical health and I am in panic mode. I lose touch with what is real when I have no one to keep me attached to it. Yes, I need reassertion some times. My throat and chest. I may not be able to speak much longer. But I have no human beings to talk to. I am totally flipping out. Here: These are the thoughts that go through my head. I often send them to her. It probably freaks her out. How can I not think like this? Maybe if people started treating me different? She probably wants me to die so I can stop bugging her. I want to stop bugging her too. I want this to stop. I don’t know how she feels so my mind races to wild assumptions. I’ve tried asking her about it. She won’t speak to me about it. Boundaries. She can’t explain what they are and I’m not allowed to ask about them. I never got an answer, I have brought up boundaries 2-3 times I believe. I told her I’d rather talk about why she feels the need to have them in the first place. To fix what I was doing wrong. Asked where she learned it from. No answer. I made crude statements about people and she answered with a how dare you text me when I’m sleeping. Leave me alone type of text. I apologized, I believe. I was really worried that morning. I have turned up the craziness a lot in the last week. I have been to the ER twice this week. I feel like I’m not going to be able to breathe soon. I am very anxious about going to another doctor tomorrow. My voice is about 75% gone. My pitch is becoming higher and higher as less air comes out. Burping, vomiting, is extremely difficult. I have barked at her about if she so indoctrinated by a gender studies degree that she refuses to be nice to a man who has been abusive to her, admitted it, explained why, and apologized many times. I have asked to be told about what kind of communication I am supposed to have with her. That I don’t know these things and I am in a very bad state of mind. I am in an abusive situation. I have called her names and used her as an emotional support animal/punching bag. She barely talks to me. I ask how she feels and she doesn’t talk. I don’t know if I’m hurting her. I ask. She doesn’t say.

Tell me how to communicate please. You’ve known me for 10 years and know what I’m like when I get like this, but I have NEVER been as bad as I am right now. This is on the level of the 2019 freakout. But I’m being way nicer and not saying fucked up hateful shit. I was taking a shit ton of xanax and god knows what else. Is that excuse good enough. That was a terrible fucking experience I was in the hospital for 10 days with a broken jaw and almost died. I have apologized and explained many times and barely get a response. I think she is occupied with other things in her life. Work, romance, fitness, hobbies, concerts, fun. That’s great. I don’t know if it’s intentional. I’ve explained how fear of abandonment is a big trigger of mine. I don’t feel assure about her intentions. Maybe I can do something different and learn from it, so I don’t do it to other people or her again. I have been making strides to improve my mental and physical health and it is getting worse. I sit in filth and regularly get told that I’m a worthless piece of fat shit that can’t do anything, fucking drug addict piece of shit! That’s what my Dad STILL says to me. After everything I’ve written about, there’s so much more too. He still spews hatred towards me. I have tried to put a stop to my parents abuse. This is why they hate me right now. I asked them to stop calling me fat and worthless. They refused.. I’ve told Arielle that I feel like she is cold and distant in the past. I’ve told her I felt like she can’t relate to a situation like mine because she has safety net after safety net. A loving family. A living wage job given to her. She lives in a safe wealthy area where poor people aren’t allowed. It’s a destination for the wealthy and elite. Pretending to be poor in college is a novelty for people who grew up in that area. It’s beautiful and people are nice. I loved it there. That was my experience living there for 8 years. She is a fit attractive female. She’s pretty. She feels that makes her a victim. I think that makes her one of the luckiest and most privileged humans on the planet. I fear that she is too indoctrinated to hate men or possibly considers me racist and sexist. Am I racist and sexist. Probably. I’m a lot of things. I still deserve help when I’m literally fucking dying and begging. She has the means to focus on whatever makes her happy. I just want to be around people who aren’t mean to me and will listen to my health concerns without telling me I’m crazy or on drugs. A wealthy inheritance to secure her future as well as a successful business. Will I live long enough to inherit my parent’s house and shit? I don’t know. It’s probably going to be taken by creditors or spent on drugs.

My parents control my life and refuse to admit they don’t know what they are doing. They are abusive towards me...STILL. To this very day.

I am screaming, hey this is what is going on! Help me. Tell me what to do. The doctors tell me it’s in my head. It’s allergies or anxiety and I should TRY to stop doing drugs.

Things are getting REALLY fucking bad. So, my mind is thinking of every possibility possible. Are the Indian doctors racist and dismissive towards me? Does Arielle want me to die because she feels I’m sexist and racist? Oversharing, honesty, and not having much of a filter have always been an issue for me. Every single fucking human being has told me to fuck off. When I met Arielle. I was a very different person. For real. I was such an arrogant douche when it came to how I slept with women and shit. I honestly felt like no girl wanted to date me. So, I just fucked them and acted like I didn’t want a relationship. I wanted to date Arielle early on. She was young. I flipped out on her. Cut myself and sent her pictures of it in 2011. That was bad and the only/last time I’ve done that to someone. Did she like me better when I just wanted to fuck her though. When I asked her if she wanted to have sex in 2018. Every doctor I have seen tells me to stop doing drugs. What the fuck, I’m not on fucking drugs. They took a drug test the second time I was in the ER on Friday. I can get drugs and do them IF I want. I don’t have an issue obtaining them. I’m not smoking. I’m not snorting anything. The only drugs I have done are edible marijuana and a couple of one-off benzo last month and last year. That’s not going to even contribute to these issues. If anything it would probably help greatly reduce the unpleasantness of my symptoms. Snorting or smoking heroin 100% fuck up my throat and chest. I have been explaining what has been going on.

Can you please, be here for me? I promise. I just want a human being who knows me. The appointment is tomorrow at 1145am. This is very scary. I don't have anyone to talk to. I promise. The Roxanne lady has been helpful to talk to at times. She is a bit weird sometimes, but she has listened to me for years and always talks to me. She tells me about her life too sometimes. She's an older woman from Georgia. I have talked to her on the phone. Name/number checks out with google. She is currently an estate attorney and I started talking to her in 2017-18. She didn't believe I was a heroin addict because of how I wrote or something. Thought my stories were far fetched. Years later, she told me that she found her husbands body after he shot himself and she wanted to be there for me, to give me someone to talk to.1hNot be here physically. But yeah. I'm really worried.1h1 week. You set the disappearing message time to 1 week. I just sat outside by my Mom. I feel off. There are huge bruises from the IV, they aren't healing. This has never happened before with bruises like that. I feel light headed. I told her that I know she did everything out of love. That I know she thought she was doing the right thing. She said, she messed up and started talking about how it was a very hard time for her, because her Mom died. I told her in regards to this health issue. I told her that I messed up. I have been screaming for help and I just wanted someone to help me. I told her that I might die. This is serious. She said, "oh hun...". Then, she started telling me about how she thinks I shouldn't tell the doctors I did heroin. I said that they need to know what caused this. This is serious. She said, "I know, but I think they dismiss you when you say that, just think you should try it.". I said, doctors shouldn't treat people who did drugs differently. They don't know why that person did drugs. There are doctors out there that will be compassionate towards people who did drugs. This was very stressful. Then, she demanded. "IIIII want to talk them!".1hShe still doesn't get it. 1hThis would be the most fucked up thing I have ever done to someone, in my life. It's not a manipulation tactic. I'm not making this up. This is real. I am being as honest as I can be. Please, I could just use some comfort or something. I have nothing here. Besides a cat, a hat, and a dog.23mI used the bathroom. My mom said, "I think I am going to go up and talk to them.". I said, I don't know. I don't know if that is possible or a good idea.20m4 her: I'm at work, haven't been able to reapond9mRespond9mI know10mGlad you have an appointment tomorrow9m

me: Thanks. Me too.9mBut this is it I think. I'm going to get the bad news and I've probably been right about it. It won't make me feel better.9mWould you have a bit of time to chat later. Or if there is an emergency.8m her: I might have time later4m me: I'll probably go to bed around 8-9.2m

#raised by narcissists #borderline #bpd #borderline freakout #sobriety #abusive parents #absuive me

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cardioasscular · 6 years

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Hi Julie! I'm new to tumblr so I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask this. I think that I may have autism. I wasn't diagnosed, but I know that some people aren't diagnosed until later in life for a lot of reasons. I'm just curious if you had any advice for figuring out whether I am on the spectrum? I've done some research but it's hard to know where to start. No pressure if you can't/don't want to answer! :) From, Bee

It’s okay! No problem, and feel free to message me any time! I actually don’t know exactly what to tell you in all honesty because I can’t remember what my life was like before I was diagnosed (I was diagnosed at a young age - I think either 3rd or 4th grade). But I can definitely tell you some things that I know about myself/that I’ve experienced that may be able to help you!

-I’ve always had an intense obsession with one specific topic (usually one main one at a time, with others that are still intense, but not AS much), which has varied through the years. Many autistic people call it a “special interest,” mine right now is TGD. The first one I can remember is dogs, which (of course) I still and will always love.

-Everything used to be way too loud for me. I do remember that I used to wear earplugs and snow earmuffs in the cafeteria in elementary school. Over time, I learned to be able to tolerate loudness more, but it can still get really overwhelming at times, especially if there’s more than one type of noise at the same time (like when I’m at work and the oven and dough presser are both going, along with people talking and phones ringing.)

-I can’t stand certain textures. Mine are greasy things, like liquid butter or bacon (I still eat it, but I have to get almost all of the grease off with paper towels), and those holographic/3D things that people love to scratch (and make THE WORST sound that I can’t stand, either). I have an autistic friend who can’t stand chalk or fleece. It varies - unlike my friend, I love fleece!

-I either talk way too loud when I’m comfortable around people, or if I’m not, I don’t talk much, if at all. I find it hard to look people directly in the eye and tend to look above or below their eyes.

-Light, like sound, can get intense for me as well. I have to carry sunglasses with me because sometimes, especially if I’m tired because it seems like my sensory overload problems get worse when I’m tired, the sun is just way too bright and I can’t always get inside to avoid it.

-I tend to do some repetitive actions, and they bring me comfort. For example, I run my hands through my hair a lot, and I pick at/bite my nails and the skin around my nails (yeah, I know, it’s not good for me, I’m trying to kick that habit).

-I find “fidget toys” useful. My favorite are these spinner rings that I have: I have one that’s blue and silver and one that’s kind of rainbow-ish and silver - I got them as a set of 2 on Amazon for like $10 if you think you’d enjoy them!

-I love to hold and squeeze things like pillows and stuffed animals. It’s comforting to me, and the pressure feels amazing - I REALLY want one of those weighted blankets, but they’re expensive and I’m not 100% certain that I’d use it as much as I’d want to (I get really hot at night).

-When I’m overloaded, sometimes I shut down. I don’t talk, I barely move, I space out, and I stare at one specific spot. Sometimes it scares both other people and myself because they don’t know what’s going on, and I feel so overwhelmed that I can’t physically get the words out.

-Sometimes I feel my own emotions too intensely. If something makes me really excited, some people would say that I get “too excited.” On the other hand, the worst part is when I’m sad or upset because a minor thing that might make someone else stressed or sad (for example, I got confused about when lab met last week and missed it, and ended up having a meltdown because of it. Most people would probably be stressed and/or upset, but wouldn’t be as upset as I got.)

-On the flip side, I have an EXTREMELY hard time feeling for other people, which I hate because it makes me seem like the stereotypical “empathy-less autistic.” It’s hard for me to relate to others’ troubles, and even though I try to be comforting, I always feel like I’m not doing it right, or that I’m making it worse. There actually have been times when I HAVE made it worse, and it made me feel completely shitty. I’m horrible at giving advice (so if none of this helps, I am extremely sorry).

-I’m horrible at teaching and giving advice. I have difficulty saying exactly what I mean sometimes, which means that sometimes, people get the wrong idea, or they just don’t understand what I’m trying to say. Most of the time, it’s fine and I can just explain more and people eventually know what I mean, but it’s gotten me into some deep shit before.

-I’m incredibly observant, which is both a blessing and a curse at times given the situation. I notice things that others may not. A good example was when a few weeks ago, my psychology professor was trying to log into the computer, which was projected on the front of the room. It kept giving the “username/password is incorrect” message, and I noticed that she had accidentally hit the spacebar and there was a space before her username, which fixed the problem. A bad example is when there’s a ton of noise, like I mentioned earlier, or multiple people having multiple conversations.

I could give so many more examples, but I feel like this is already much longer than I wanted in the first place.

One thing that I would try is to ask some people around you that you love and trust if they notice any typical actions that seem “weird.” If you’re close with your parents, ask about your actions as a child.

Questions like, “When did I start talking?” “Did I seem unattached to Mom/Dad at first?” “Did I have any ‘odd’ obsessions?” “Did I fit in with other children my age, or did I stand out due to ‘weird’ actions?” may help.

Observe your actions, and see if you catch yourself doing something that you don’t know exactly “why” you’re doing it, that other people don’t typically seem to do.

One thing that I think would really help, if you haven’t already, make some in-person friends (online friends are wonderful, don’t get me wrong, but most of the time you can’t see how your online friends act) who are autistic! Observe some of their behavior, maybe ask a few questions like, “why do you do (x)?” and explain that you have some questions about autism, that you’d like to have a better understanding. Although I do feel uncomfortable talking about myself a majority of the time, I am always happy to explain to others who have a good heart and just want to understand, learn, and support.

Every autistic person is different, so what others may do/feel may not apply to you, and that’s perfectly okay!

It’s always good to ask questions, and I don’t know about your situation, but many public K-12 schools do some academic testing that can point you in the right direction. If you’re a university student (I’m not 100% sure about it, but the University of Tennessee in Knoxville does this), maybe look into your school’s psychology program. Students (under the direction of their professors, of course) can perform academic testing. I think this does cost, though, and I have no idea what the prices are. My college’s disabilities services program sent me to UT for testing and paid for it so I could have updated information, as my last evaluations were done in elementary school.

Again, feel free to message me any time! I’m usually available, but sometimes I do get busy, which is why (and I’m so sorry about this) I took a super long time and answered you super late.

(If you’re autistic as well and have any advice to offer, please feel free to add on!)

#I hope this all came out okay #sometimes I just kinda throw stuff out and it gets all out of order and stuff and it's hard for people to fully understand #and I started this earlier and had to come back to it because shit came up #...and I didn't proofread. Whoops.#asd #actually autistic #autism

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surveysonfleek · 7 years

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365.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 7

601. Do you have a lust for life? i wouldn’t say so lol. 602. Do you want to get more out of life? experience and memories i guess. 603. Would you want to learn to: Convert to Buddhism? no. Cure a hangover? i kinda already know this one. Lie persuasively? i don’t lie often, so no. 604. What character from a movie is most like you? i’m blank right now. 605. Are you comfortable with the idea of your own death? not really.

606. How do you feel about arranged marriages? i understand it’s cultural but it sucks. especially if either parties have experienced love before. 607. What do you hate that everyone else seems to like? olives. 608. What do you like that others seem to hate? surveys lol. 609. If you had to be named after a month, which month would you pick? august. 610. Is time more like a highway or a meadow to you? it’s a damn highway. 611. What is your favorite movie? i have a ton. 612. Which would you choose to be back in the day: a warrior, an alchemist, a minstrel, a bard, an oracle, a peasant, or a merchant? probably a merchant. 613. What is your favorite song lyric? i don’t have one. 614. What will you never run out of? love. 615. If you could force someone to fall madly in love with you, (anyone you choose) would you do it? no, i’d hate knowing that it’s not genuine. 616. Have you ever seen the Disney movie The Black Cauldron? no. 617. Have you ever read The Black Cauldron by Alexander Lloyd (or any of his other books in the Prydain Chronicles)? no. 618. Have you ever written a paper the night before it was due? How about the day it was due? yeah but i had already started it beforehand. 619. Is there a movie you have watched so many times that you can quote it line for line? yes, def mean girls lol. 620. What is your favorite season? autumn. 621. Do you mind being described as cute? i don’t mind but why lol. 622. What is the tackiest object in your home? i’m not quite sure...there’s definitely something. 623. What do you think people are most ignorant towards? things that they haven’t experienced. 624. What is it that makes you an interesting person? i guess it depends on the person, if we have similarities i guess i could be interesting. 625. What makes other people interesting to you? just their life stories i guess. 626. How open to suggestion are you? always. it doesn’t mean i’ll follow it though. 627. Is Michael Jackson black or white? black. 628. Are you often lonely? not often. 629. What’s the most unusual pet you’ve ever had? a fish? nothing crazy. 630. Have you ever threatened an authority figure? no. 631. If you had to choose would you rather make all your decisions henceforth with your head only or with your heart only? haha shit. heart i think. 632. How imaginative are you? not crazy imaginative. 633. Do you like the Counting Crows? no. 634. If you took this survey from the diary (5000 Q Survey V2.0) did you note me so I could read it? ok. 635. Are you more tense or laid back? i get to both extremes so it’s weird. 636. Does your happiness depend on anyone else, or are you happy no matter what any one says or does? it can be both. 637. What do you think of the idea of putting the bible into the format of a fashion magazine to attract the interest of teenagers? haha kinda weird. why fashion? maybe as a normal magazine format. 638. How often do you drink to get drunk? about once a month. sometimes less. 639. Would you consider yourself to be diplomatic? yes. 640. Do you think that most of the classes you have taken were taught in such a way as to make plain the relevance of the subject matter in your everyday life? not at all. 641. Do you remember Crystal Pepsi? no. 642. When was the last time you spent a night away from home? two weeks ago. 643. Some people say that there is no such thing as a stupid question. Is that true? i don’t agree. 644. What is the most interesting TV channel? discovery channel. 645. Name one song you could live without hearing ever again: that watch me whip watch me nae nae song lol. 646. Do your pets understand you when you talk? probably not. maybe just my body language. 647. What are three things you HAVE NOT done that might surprise people? i’m an open book so i don’t think i could really surprise anyone that knows me. 648. Have you ever had a secret admirer? no. 649. Have you been to a museum this year? yes. 650. Do you ever watch porn? i have before but i don’t regularly. 651. Do you think that it would be a good idea if people served in the army, navy or air force for a while before they were allowed to vote? umm idk. 652. If you were required to do this to vote, would you? idk. it depends how informed i was. 653. Do people often give you weird looks? not that i notice or care. 654. Do like Japanese cooking? yes, one of my faves. 655. Do you care for stray animals? no. 656. Which animated movies have you seen and what did you think of them: A Charlie Brown Christmas A Garfield Halloween The Secret of Nimh The Last Unicorn The original Lord of the Rings cartoons lmao none. 657. Are you ambidextrous (equally good at using both hands)? nah. i mean i can use my left hand for stuff but it’s not perfect. 658. Do you always say; “bless you” after someone sneezes, or do you hesitate? if i know them i’ll say it. 659. If you and your friends could go away for 2 days over Halloween weekend where would you go? a secluded beach house somewhere. 660. Which of these animated movies have you seen and what did you think of them: Watership Down As the Wind Blows Grave of the Fireflies How the Grinch Stole Christmas Spirited Away i’ve seen two but don’t remember them. 661. Do you feel that society is male dominated, female dominated, or neutral? let’s be real, male are still dominant. i hop this changes in my lifetime. 662. What words offend you? i hate when people say the n-word, especially if they’re not entitled too. it’s so cringey and embarassing. 663. They’re just words. Can you get over it? nope. 664. Have you ever looked into different religions? i’ve learnt about them i guess. 665. Which ones have you looked into? all. 666. What do you think of Satanism as a religion? idk. i don’t know much about that one. 667. Do you like it better when your classes are taught sitting in rows or sitting in a circle? rows. 668. Have you ever read your own tarot cards? nope. 669. Which ones do you like better, the three old star wars movies or the 2 new ones? i don’t watch star wars. 670. If you scream in outer space does it make a sound? no idea. 671. If you saw The Queen of the Damned did you want to be a vampire/Goth afterwards? i didn’t watch it. 672. If you saw SLC Punk did you want to be punk afterwards? - 673. What is your favorite zombie movie? - 674. Best kids birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater all of them are pretty cool tbh. 675. What were your parties like when you were a kid? i had some at home with a jumping castle, mcdonalds, parks etc. 676. Best teen (about 15-16) birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert house party or restaurant. 677. What are/were your 15-16 year old parties like? everyone has either movies, house parties or restaurant birthdays lol. 678. Best 18th birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert, club, pool hall, college party club. 679. If you are 18 what was your party like? i went clubbing. 680. Best 21st birthday party: ceramics, chuck-e-cheese, roller rink, bowling, sleep over, movie theater, house party, catered in a hall, restaurant, family trip, concert, club, pool hall, college party, bar, Atlantic city/Las Vegas trip a vegas trip would’ve been amazing. 681. If you saw The Craft were you interested in wicca/paganism/magic afterwards? sorta but i didn’t look into it. 682. What are your top 3 priorities? being happy, finding a new job and losing weight. 683. If you saw fight club did you want to get into a fistfight afterwards? i haven’t seen it. 684. What is your favorite smell? way too many to name. 685. Give everything below a humor rating (1 = laugh your ass off, 2 = lol, 3 = smile, 4 = lame, 5 = not funny, 6 = offensive): People falling 3 Rape jokes 6 Sarcastic comments 3 Blonde jokes 5 Dirty jokes 2 God/religion jokes 5 Long-ass jokes 4 Death jokes 5 Pain/sickness jokes 5 Animals doing cute stuff 3 Bodily functions 3 Knock jokes 5 Ethnic jokes 5 Puns 2 Ironic situations 2 685. If you saw Cruel Intentions did you want to have lots of meaningless sex afterwards? no, i was a kid. 686. Do you get at least three hugs per day? it depends who i’m hanging out with. 687. What should someone never say to you/call you if they want to remain on your good side? no talking shit about my family or friends pretty much. 688. If you saw Trainspotting did you want to do drugs afterwards? never seen it. 689. Do movies have a great influence on you? sometimes. they have to be good lol. 690. Do you have a favorite reality TV show? yes, a couple. 691. Are there certain roles that people are pressured to play in society or can they basically do whatever they want? sometimes it depends who your family is. at the end of the day everyone should be able to do whatever they want. 692. How does the 2004 Dawn of the Dead remake compare to the original movie? haven’t seen either. 693. Have you ever held a magnifying glass over an insect to burn it? i’ve tried that as a kid but it didn’t work. 694. Have you ever pulled the wings off a fly, butterfly or any other insect? noooo that’s so mean. 695. What would you think of a guy (if you're into guys) or a girl (if you're into girls) who wanted to take you to the park to feed the birds and look at the turtles and fish in the water on a date? i’d be down, why not lol. 696. Do you use public pools? i haven’t been to one in years. 697. Do you use public bathrooms? if i’m desperate. 698. Do you use public showers? no. 699. How old will you be in 17 years? 43. 700. Would it effect you at all if you knew that a very large meteor was headed towards earth that would impact in 17 years? as the time came closer, yeah.

#survey #surveys #quiz #bored #questions

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autisticbyaccident · 5 years

Text

So I self harmed for the first time in over 6 years today.

I haven’t cut myself since I was 16.

On my 16th birthday I stabbed a pair of scissors into my arm. I haven’t drawn my own blood since then.

I remember reading something a while back in a fan fiction. One character was trying to explain to another what self harm was and they said something along the lines of “a lot of people do it in a hundred different ways for a thousand different reasons” and it really stuck with me.

Hurting myself for the first time in so, so long (after I thought I’d moved past this and really learned better coping skills) got me thinking about why I did it to begin with and I still don’t really know.

See, I have something called Erb’s Palsey in my left arm. It’s an injury sustained at birth that, to put it very simply, permenantly damaged the muscles and nerves in that arm. I can’t raise my arm above my head, I have limited motor skills in that arm (meaning I can’t preform fine motor tasks like writing very well) and, this is the important part, I can barely feel anything. Hot, cold, pain, nothing. I once broke my thumb and had no idea for 6 weeks because there was absolutely no pain besides something numb and bothersome that to anyone else wouldn’t have registered but to me buzzed in the back of my mind because I was so unused to any sensations in that part of my body.

It took nearly 20 years for me to admit cutting, burning, biting, scratching and stabbing my arm was even self harm. I always argued “but it doesn’t hurt”. 20 years from the time I was a toddler and would bite scars into myself in a rage to the time I was nearly an adult. 20 years of insisting this part of my body wasn’t hurting me, simply because it couldn’t send certain signals to my brain.

So why was I doing it?

Well I know why I’ve always done it in the moment. Guilt. I have a huge sense of guilt and disgust for myself as a person. I would, especially when I was younger, run my mouth or argue too long or say something hurtful before my brain had even caught up to say “wait, don’t do that”. After it was done I would choke on the guilt of the minor (sometimes major) hurt I’d caused. I would drown in it until I was overcome with rage at what I’d said or done and draw my own blood just to appease to guilt, to just make my conscious shut up, shut up, SHUT UP.

I had no Jiminy Cricket on my shoulder, rather I have an elephant, a 2 ton Goliath of disapproval shoving its trunk down my throat, short stopping my breathing till the guilt seeps into my veins.

So instead of ever figuring out why I couldn’t handle my guilt like a normal person, I just decided to be good. To be kind and patient and perfect, always, always, always perfect.

But the thing is it doesn’t work like that. Humans aren’t like that in general, we say stuff before we mean to, our words trip us up, we stumble and fall from grace. All of which I can forgive in most anyone else in a heart beat. But not myself. Never myself.

Which is funny because I should really be more patient with myself, shouldn’t I? Especially now that I can at least partially understand why my moods smother and burn me with their intensity, can at least half way attest for the way my mouth opens without my command when I’m excited or buzzing with manic energy. I don’t really understand my Bipolar Disorder beyond the scope of how it destroyed my grandmother, how it stole her life and ended up the cause of her death, and how it kept me disconnect from my peers until that point where I hesitantly began to gather myself into a facsimile of normality. To whisper the words of silence into my own ear so maybe someone would talk to me, to smother my own over excited voice and begin hiding my swinging moods.

But for all that my logical brain at least hesitantly knows I’ll have days where my mood runs high high high, where I’m buzzing beneath my skin. Maybe on those days I can be an acceptable kind of energetic, instead of manic I can make my friends laugh and giggle till we cry and can get into deep conversations about our favorite movies, or go dancing and singing along at the top of my lungs.

Or maybe I’ll have a day like today where I hold it together

Together

Even though I walked into my daycare classroom and my kids were gone and instead I had 16 children all too young and confined to too small a space with no warning.

Even though I didn’t know any of these kids and had no time to prepare, no heads up as to what which child may need or time to figure out what to do that wouldn’t cause total chaos in my class.

I hold it together because I’ve got 16 2/3 year olds in a 20ftx20ft box who all need 3 hours of stimulation and games. I hold it together because, god above, this I can do. This I understand. This I can stay patient and level for. Because these kids need me, and that need means I can hold my shit together for 5 hours until their parents come, goddamnit.

And I did, I swear I did. I held it together beautifully. I adjusted quickly to having much younger children in my class, I restructured my routine to accommodate their shorter attention spans and waxing and waning energy. Let no one ever say I don’t know how to fucking handle kids, let no one ever say I’m not at my peak surrounded by grimy hands and snotty noses.

But there was one. Just one. I mean, there always is. And they’re not bad kids, they just can’t control themselves sometimes. (And I know that feeling, so I can stay calm, I can’t damn well relate and remember). But she spit on me, and bit me, and hit me, and pulled one girls hair, and threw her shoes at someone smaller, and screamed from the corner of the room. And all my methods failed me. Because I couldn’t give her the one on one attention she desperately needed to correct her behavior.

Because J just left his play center

And G is chewing on that toy train

And A is crying

And K wants a hug

And C is arguing with D because D stole her babydoll

And B is screaming and took off her shirt

And, holy shit, E are you peeing in your pants right now!

And -

And this little one is being a total monster. Following me around and running around the room and screaming and spitting in my face and pulling my shirt down. So, for the first time, I had to call the woman who runs the daycare in to remove a child. A common enough occurrence for other classes. These problem kids typically end up with me, I’m proud to say.

But this has never been the case for me. Never me. God above as my witness, not for me. I take pride in understanding these kids, I take pride in my patience when I work. I always try to be better, I always worry I’m too strict or not teaching them well enough, I worry my methods aren’t up to date or supported by the research. Is the extinction method of discipline good for these kids? Have I taken a second for reverse time out? Does that kid need stimulation and a calm activity or do they need to sweat it out in the corner?

But it was just this day. I walked in to a class twice my usual size with kids I didn’t know, kids who didn’t know my rules or routine or me, kids I didn’t have that connection with and had no information on.

And this little girl just

Pushed

God

Damned

Mother

Fucking

Buttons

And so I went back to my college campus. And I saw my friend. And the energy was buzzing under my skin and the frustration making my want to growl and scream like that little girl did, like I used to as a child, like an animal.

So I started bitching, and bitching. Loudly, too loudly. And I complained about this girl and this day and having almost 20 kids with no freaking warning!!! And, I’m not excusing it, I would never excuse it or ask forgiveness for it, I called the little girl who left crescent shaped bruises on my arm and bared my bra to 20 kids and made a 2 year old cry a rather unkind name. And, rightly so, someone called me out on it, and then said I should never work with kids.

And then I crashed, cause maybe she’s right. Maybe if I can’t hold it together even off the clock and watch my tongue I shouldn’t be anywhere near these kids. (There’s no maybe about it. It honestly, truly, was a disgusting thing to do.)

My brain stopped, it caught up and hit a glass wall. My lips finally stopping moving and the buzzing under my skin grew and grew and I knew I deserved to be punished for saying something so awful about something so small. It was just a name, it was just between me and a friend, I only said it once and that’s not really how I think of that little girl, and I was just so mad. But names have power, names follow and twist and grow inside you.

So, for the first time in 6 years, I felt that elephant on my shoulders, that guilt. That’s not to say I haven’t felt guilty about things these last six years, but I’ve been able to expand my coping skills and step back. I’ve made my mom cry and instead of breaking skin I tore up paper and went for a drive or colored or cried or wrote and wrote until my hands cramped.

But none of those were sufficient this time, because I lost my temper and said something horrible. I can argue “my dad called me that all the time as a kid” or “I didn’t say it to her face” but none of that matters.

I did something bad. I wanted punishment and atonement but that’s not something I can get for this, for lots of reasons, mainly because there’s no one to dole those things out except myself. And I thought, maybe that’s what it comes down to. I spill my own blood because I hope that will help me forgive myself.

But no, because if that’s the case, I’m shit at a forgiveness. Because now I look down at my mutilated arm and every goddamned scar is a lesson, a story, a reminder.

That one is from the time I got into trouble for hitting that girl in 3rd grade

There’s the time I said something about that girl who’s mom wasn’t her biological mom in 1st grade

That’s when I failed that class in 9th grade

That’s when I tried to kill myself and chickened out at 14

That’s when I broke my friends jewelry box at 12

Those 3 are from when I knew that boy was being hurt by his brother in 7th grade but was too scared to say anything

That one is when my friend got into a fist fight with her dad in middle school and swore me to secrecy, even though I knew I should have said something

There’s the time I got into an argument with my mom when I was

All my sins carved out for the world to see. A consistent reminder of my constant failures.

Perhaps I’m my own negative reinforcement. I may not be able to feel in that arm, it may be near pointless as a limb, but as least I can make it useful. A form of body and behavior modification. “See what you did? See how horrible you can be? Good. Now the world can see too.”

Maybe I’m not healing, maybe my threshold for what makes a horrible person is just expanding, specializing into a fine point.

And maybe it’ll work. Maybe one day I’ll be so good for so long I’ll come to the end of my life with no new marks on my skin. Maybe one day I’ll be good enough to allow my own existence.

Not today though.

Today I did something bad, and I broke my record. I did something that would break my mothers heart because I just didn’t know what else to do with this horrible thing I’d done. I hope there won’t be a next time, but if there is I hope I handle it better.

#bpd vent #bpd blog #bipolar disorder #bipolar #tw: mental health #tw: self harm #tw: cutting #tw: suicidal thoughts #healing #growing #personal #toxic guilt #bad coping mechanisms #tw: scars #bad choices #tw: body mutilation

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