#i’m currently trying to convince her not to take too much on this summer and i *THINK* it’s going well | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

otomes-and-tears · 1 year

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AAAAA OKAYOKAYOKAY NEW FLUFFY IDEA FOR OL2!!

Qiu and Tama (separate),step 2 with a GN MC/Reader (Best Friend or crush status but yet to confess! Basically both parties are pining,being hopelessly in love HAHA) BUT THIS TIME IT'S SUMMER VACATION TIME!! Maybe they go on a trip on their own,try new summer-deserts etc! I didn't have a specific prompt or anything,I'm not sure which way you wanna write this idea in SO IT'S UP TO YOUU! I just thought cute,fluffy scenes would make both couples,respectively,A LOT LOT MORE CUTER!!

♦ A summer with Qiu and Tamarack ♦

► tags and warnings: GN reader

► words: 2103

► A/N: Broke my rules again by writing two one-shots.

SORRY! I LOVE QIU AND TAMARACK TOO MUCH

By the way— some of the dialogue is inspired by this prompt list!

► Masterlist

Tamarack

“Are you alright?” MC glances at Tamarack, worried. While their first instinct might’ve been to lightly tease her, it was overrun by concern when they saw just how miserable she seemed to be.

She considered the question for a moment before nodding her head “no”, her braided hair swishing from side to side at the motion, as MC tracks its movement with their eyes.

She knew better than to lie to them. It was obvious, for one, and they had known each other for long enough for Tamarack to accept that, sometimes, it was just better to give up and accept that MC is going to take care of her even if Tamarack insists that she’s fine.

Lying just meant that they’d be more worried.

MC quickly hand her a water bottle— the sole reason why they’d left the pool in the first place, and she readily accepts it, muttering a quiet “thank you” before opening the lid to take a sip. MC sits at the edge of the lounge chair she’s in, taking in the shade after a long day in the sun. Tamarack seems to brighten up a bit before having some water, but MC knows there’s no way it would help much with her current predicament— that being the fact that almost all surface of skin that wasn’t protected by her one-piece swimsuit was currently bright pink, and undoubtedly, hot to the touch.

Well, MC knew that Tamarack didn’t tan in the sun, she burned.

When they first met, and she wasn’t nearly and shy and quiet and afraid to bother as she is now, it wasn’t uncommon to see her with red shoulders, burned by the sun, when she inevitably forgot to put sunscreen on to play outside.

As she grew up, she was much more diligent about it. Both to save herself the trouble of dealing with the aftermath and to preserve her health.

In fact, MC was absolutely sure Tamarack had applied it a few hours ago, before they got in the pool.

MC was sure because they were the one who applied sunscreen to her back, and it took a lot of willpower on their part to absolutely not think about it and not make it a big deal because they were friends and it didn’t really mean anything, and they were deluding themselves into thinking that the pretty blush on her neck was related to them at all.

But then again… MC helped her apply it once, but didn’t see it being reapplied, since they were so busy playing in the pool— Oh.

“Wanna go inside?” MC suggests, so Tamarack doesn’t have to ask them and spend too long overthinking about having been bothersome, even though MC always makes sure to reassure her that it’s fine, and they’d much rather do something they’re both having fun with rather than something that only they’re enjoying. “You can shower first, and I can look for some Aloe gel we can use. I’m sure Mom has it in there somewhere.”

Mom always very practical, and had a way of always staying on top of situations like these, there was no doubt in MC’s mind that she saw this coming and prepared for the likely chance that it happened.

Tamarack didn’t look convinced, looking over at MC with uncertainty.

“Are you sure? Don’t you want to swim for longer?”

She asks, and MC doesn’t think twice before nodding no.

“Nah, all that swimming made me a little tired.” They admit, with a smile. It was technically true, anyways. “I’m alright just chilling inside. Maybe we can play a board game or watch TV and eat ice cream!”

MC got up from the lounged chair there were perched at— their excitement over their new plans finally managing to convince Tamarack to give in.

“I’m okay with anything as long as we can spend more time together.” Tamarack says, and MC’s heart flutters at her words “...And we’re away from the sun.”

MC offered one of their hands to her, which she gratefully accepted. It’s a gesture that they’ve repeated many times throughout the years, her soft hand grabbing theirs to lead them away to the woods, on their way home, through the corridors of their school or just holding for the sake of holding, because they were close and didn’t really need a reason to hold each other’s hand.

It didn’t need to mean much.

In fact, it shouldn’t mean anything at all, It was just like helping her with her sunscreen or spreading aloe on her back.

It’s a gesture that survived from their childhood years— a sign of their closeness and strong bond and friendship. Nothing more.

There was nothing romantic about it.

Then why did such a simple, meaningless gesture mean so much to them?

Why did the heat of her palm make them dizzy? Why did their face flush? Why did they feel a sudden breathlessness they couldn’t explain away by the summer heat?

In truth, MC knew exactly why.

They had known it since the day Tamarack jumped out of a pile of leaves, giggling over having gotten the upperhand over the new kid, her hair glowing golden under the sunlight in a way that made her look so at home within the woods, MC could’ve sworn she was a fairy playing tricks on them.

Maybe they couldn’t name what they were feeling then, being too young to properly understand why the pretty girl that gave them affection so easily felt different from everyone else, but they were keenly aware of their feelings now, when they seemed to get more overwhelming by the day.

One day, they would gather enough courage to say something.

But that day wouldn’t be today, as they gently guide her inside, looking back to admire how her face seemed to redden even more at their touch and how soft her features looked when their eyes met.

extra

It’s an hour later when they’re sitting on the couch, Tamarack’s short legs streched over MC’s lap as they eat ice-cream, the newest Ariana Grande music video playing on the TV in one of the rare occasions MC managed to catch MTV playing music.

MC should be paying attention, they really should. Tamarack seems really engrossed in a story about the new piece she’s been practising on her cello, and how rude one of the violin girls was about her getting a note wrong when her violin was entirely out of tune the entire time, but the only thing MC can really focus on is how Tamarack smells like Aloe Vera gel and how when she’s snarking about annoying violin players, she rolls her eyes with a disdain Qiu could only dream about channelling, and it’s so cute it makes them fall in love with her all over again.

Qiu

“Ugh, I’m so hot.”

Mc whines, trying to walk a little faster to keep up with Qiu’s pace.

It was a terribly hot and humid day in the middle of the summer— one of those days where MC, usually, wouldn’t really bother trying to do anything more than melting on their couch.

Unfortunately for them, they had promised a week beforehand to join Qiu on the next outdoor movie session, which just happened to fall on the hottest day of summer.

Fun.

Well, realistically, they could’ve cancelled.

Qiu wouldn’t have minded it too much. They knew about MC’s aversion to heat, after all, and would’ve probably offered a good alternative or simply called another friend, who would be less annoying about being hot and sweaty.

But… It was Qiu they were talking about.

Qiu asked for their company, and even if they tried to sound really nonchalant about it, MC could tell that Qiu was excited and that this movie night meant a lot to them.

So MC would suck it up and do it for them. Even if they were hot, annoyed and could feel the sweat making their shirt cling to their body in a way they could only describe as uncomfortable.

“Love the confidence.”

Qiu says, without missing a beat, and MC doesn’t know it they should laugh or turn away and go home right now.

They end up deciding on rolling their eyes and hitting their arm playfully. Qiu laughs at their frustration, and it would be annoying if it the sound of their laugh wasn’t so endearing.

“Shut up.”

Mc says, but there’s no heat in it. They could never say it and mean it, and Qiu knows that.

Maybe that’s why they’re so smug all the time.

When they’re like this— walking together and teasing each other, Mc can almost pretend like they’re on a date.

That Qiu didn’t really mean to invite them to watch a movie as friends, but as something more. That the way they looked at MC wasn’t just out of fondness for a close friend, but as someone they loved in the way MC wanted to be loved.

But it’s not like they’d allow themselves to indulge too much in this fantasy. No. Qiu wouldn’t look at MC in the way they wanted Qiu, and it was too selfish to expect that of them.

Not when Qiu already didn’t rely on too many people. Their friendgroup was small and tight-knit and being included was a huge sign of their trust on MC.

Trust as a friend.

Best friend, maybe.

And MC was more than willing to pretend like it didn��t hurt them if it meant more days like this, where Qiu seemed so content and relaxed just by walking with MC in silence.

“We’re almost there.”

Qiu comments, breaking MC out of their reverie.

If they noticed MC staring at them, they’re merciful enough to not comment on it this time, which they’re immesefully grateful for. They don’t know if they have the mental capacity of dealing with more of Qiu’s teasing today without becoming a blushing mess.

MC can just see the entrance of the park when they feel the first raindrops. They freeze, and grab Qiu by the sleeve before they can take another step.

“Autumn… I think it’s going to rain.”

Their warning doesn’t come quick enough. Qiu looks at the MC as they feel the rain growing in intensity, and can just manage to start running before it starts pouring.

Of course. Summer showers always seemed to happen when it’s most inconvenient.

They’re soaking wet by the time they reach the park and manage to hide away in the closest structure with a roof— that being a bandstand, because of course the universe would present MC with a perfect romance-movie scenario when they’re already stupidly in love with their best friend who definitely doesn’t reciprocate their feelings.

“You think they’ll still show the movie?”

MC asks, a little hopeful and all too willing to break the silence and any treacherous trains of thought about how Qiu still managed to look pretty like this.

And how close they were, and how it would be just so easy to reach out and kiss them.

“I don’t think so.” Qiu answers, obviously annoyed by it. “The equipment must be wet— and the grass will be too. They might postpone it to another day.”

Mc agrees with their assessment, and they stand in silence for another moment, just watching the rain fall.

“I’m sorry we’ll miss your movie. I know you were excited to watch it.”

MC says, after a moment, and Qiu just shrugs, like it’s no big deal and disappointment isn’t etched on their face.

“It’s fine.” When Qiu and Mc’s eyes meet the disappointment seems to melt away in Qiu’s face, and they smile. It’s small, almost imperceptive, but MC knows it’s there and that they had another idea. “I think we’ll be here for a while… And we still have the food we brought.”

They hold up the picnic basket they were holding, and MC immediately understands what they’re hinting at.

“Ever the problem solver, huh?”

MC teases, and Qiu considers it a yes to their unasked question. Between both of them, they quickly set up their impromptu picnic, determined to still have a good time together, even if it wasn’t quite like they’d imagined it.

Extra

“You know, I’ve seen romance movies that start like this.” Qiu comments, smiling teasingly in a way that makes MC think that they know too much. They flush, looking away, not quite knowing how to respond to Qiu’s implication, and they’re too happy at their inaction. “You’re too cute.”

God, Qiu is going to kill them one of these days.

#writing the cul de sac trio in the summer just seems...... wrong #bee’s writing #our life 2 #our life now and forever #olnf #olnf hcs #our life headcanons #qiu lin #our life qiu #our life tamarack #tamarack baumann

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lovelyladyabsinthewrites · 7 months

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From the Ashes Pt.17

Pairing(s): Pairing(s): Rhaegar Targaryen x Lannister!Reader, one-sided!Jaime Lannister x Lannister!Reader, Jaime Lannister x Cersei Lannister

Warnings: slow burn fic, changing povs, Selmy & Tyrion POV

Words: 2262

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 3.5 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 16 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35

Book Two of Dārilaros hen ōrbar se perzys (Heir of Ash and Fire)

Lady Ashara Dayne was as beautiful as the day Barristan had first met her. The most beautiful woman in the entire world, at least in his eyes. There was an undeniable flutter in his chest as his palms began to develop a film of sweat. And it wasn’t due to the Dornish heat. Even little Tyrion gazed at the mistress of Starfall with enchanted eyes. Their journey through the Red Mountains had been long and excruciating as the glare of the sun bore down on them. Only to be relieved when they neared the shores of the cooling Summer Sea.

Playful lilac eyes that reminded him of the Targaryens, Ashara welcomes them with open arms. “This is quite the surprise. To what do I owe the honor of this visit? I hope it doesn’t have to do with my brother.” Her smile falls. “Arthur is okay, right?”

Barristan purses his lips in uncertainty. “To be honest I do not know, my lady. I have heard no news on Rhaegar’s front.”

Concern filled her pretty face but she relented with a nod. “I see. Knowing Arthur I can only assume that he is doing okay. . .”

“He is one of the best knights in all of Westeros.” Tyrion happily points out.

“Ah, I see you have acquired yourself a young squire.” Ashara smiles down at Tyrion. Nothing on her face showed displeasure at the sight of the dwarf which surprised Tyrion.

“Yes. This is Vaiko Hill.”

“A strong name.” Her long dark hair falls over her shoulder like a silk curtain. It made Tyrion perk up and shyly blush.

“My lady, I’m afraid this visit isn’t one of leisure.” Solemnly, Barristan breaks the news of their mission and shows Ashara the chest they are to deliver to Essos.

She examines it, running her hands over the worn out wood and metal trim. “You have not mentioned to whom you would be delivering such an important package to. If it were for anyone normal surely you would have just left through Blackwater Bay, yes?”

Barristan became all too aware of Tyrion’s presence. “I have been given instructions not to say the recipient’s name. It’s a rather delicate situation.”

Ashara was smart. Much smarter than Barristan gave her credit for. “You must understand my hesitation to let you board one of my ships. You have still allied yourself to Aerys, the man my brother is trying to overthrow. What if this item is meant to destroy the efforts of Arthur and the rest of Rhaegar’s army? I can’t let that happen. My family comes first, Ser. I will not take part in my own brother’s undoing.” There was no need for a sword to make Ashara fierce. One of many reasons why Starfall was left in her care since her nephew Edric was too young to rule. When she wanted, she could emanate fear. It reminded Selmy of the young Cersei Lannister; lovely yet there was a terrifying aura about them.

It made Barristan swallow back the immediate nerves that had surfaced. “This matter has nothing to do with the war, I swear on it.”

His words do little to convince her as she stands her ground. “Then you won’t mind if I join your company to Essos.”

Gawking now, he stammers over several excuses. “My lady, I assure you-”

“Your assurance means little to me. Not when I know that you are still loyal to the Mad King.”

Tyrion squirmed beside his knight as he felt the storm of tension brewing over head. A fact that Tyrion had forgotten was that Selmy was indeed still loyal to the current crown. If the rumors he heard were true, then Aerys had a hand in (y/n)’s death. He felt the tips of his ears grow warm as anger settled in. The man he had been traveling with for weeks was in charge of protecting a monster. His sister was dead and Barristan was shielding the murderer. How could he have forgotten? Truth be told, Tyrion quite enjoyed traveling with the older knight. They got along fairly well and Tyrion was enthralled by the stories he told. Barristan was the father Tyrion never had. How could he continue to follow this man though when his liege possibly murdered his beloved sister? It would be a dishonor to her memory.

He couldn’t say any of that out loud. At least not in front of Ashara. He wasn’t Tyrion Lannister. He was a bastard with a name of a hero he had read about in a Valyrian story. Even though it pained him, Tyrion kept his mouth shut and glared down at his leather boots.

With a grimace and a reluctant sigh, Barristan agreed. She would find out sooner or later who he’d be traveling to. As would Tyrion.

Satisfied, the smile returns to Ashara’s face. “It’s settled then. We leave for Essos tomorrow morning. Oh! Both of you must have had quite a long journey. Lets get you some food and a comfortable bed.”

“How long will you be gone for?” Allyria asks her older sister. Young Edric Dayne had attached himself to Vaiko like a lost duckling. Vaiko didn’t seem to mind too much as he entertained the lordling with tales of his journey while his master washed up. The sisters watched them as they spoke quietly to one another.

A few of Starfall’s knights, when hearing Vaiko tell Edris how Selmy was teaching him the art of the blade, wanted to test the dwarf’s skills. Unafraid, he wielded a makeshift sword made of wood. He showed off the stances that Barristan the Great had showed him, earning a stare of admiration from Edric.

“I don’t know. A month possibly.”

That causes Allyria to groan. “Why did you have to insist on going?”

Ashara crosses her arms in front of her chest. “I am doing my part in protecting our brother. We can’t trust him if he still allies himself with Rhaegar’s enemy.” Then in a softer tone she adds “I don’t want to lose another brother, Allyria. I won’t be able to survive. . .”

Allyria’s heart melted and she wrapped her arms around her sister. “I know. Adriyan died too soon.”

Returning her sister’s embrace, Ashara sighs. “I can’t do much, but at least I can keep an eye on Aerys’ most trusted knight. Make sure that he truly won’t do anything that could make the war end in Aerys’ favor.”

She nods, lavender eyes cast to their clasped hands as Allyria ran her thumb over one of Ashara’s rings. A shiny opal in the shape of a multi-pointed star, the same one she had on her pinky. “It can be a dangerous journey.”

That didn’t deter Ashara as she lets go of Allyria’s hands. “The world can be a dangerous place. However, it can also be an exciting one filled with adventure.”

“At least try to be careful. I know you can be reckless at times.”

It makes her older sister laugh. “Of course. I intend on returning to Starfall. Make no mistake about that, Allyria.”

Returning to observing the two young boys, Allyria finds herself frowning. “Is that really Ser Selmy’s squire?”

“Vaiko? Yes.”

“Is he. . .”

Ashara already knew what her sister was thinking. “Yes. That doesn’t seem to stop him though. I quite admire little Vaiko. As far as I know, there has never been a dwarf squire let alone a knight. I’m eager to get to know him better.”

“I hope the boy prospers under Selmy’s tutelage.”

“If anyone can make Vaiko a true knight, it’s Barristan Selmy. The only other man who could possibly beat Arthur in a duel.”

A sly coil of a smile sneaks up on Allyria. “Oh? What about your northern lordling?”

She refuses to meet Allyria’s teasing grin. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Chin atop the back of her hand, Allyria knew she had cornered her. “I suppose you wouldn’t be interested then in Ned’s most recent act of bravery.”

Try as she may, Ashara couldn’t keep up the facade of disinterest. “I’m sure its an enthralling story.”

A handmaid shortly came in to announce that supper was ready.

Watching the dock hands load the cargo onto the ship, Ashara gazes at the horizon of the Summer Sea. Seagulls wailed above, pestering fish below as they dove into the blue water. A small layer of fog covered the dock in the early morning, bringing a slight chill to Ashara’s bare shoulders. Her intent gaze watched as Selmy carried the chest he had showed her. What was in there? From when she had examined it, there was no latch or even padlock.

An excited Tyrion follows close behind Barristan, the thumping his boots made against the wooden deck sent tremors in his chest. He had never been on a ship before. Whenever he did travel it was always by carriage, to keep him hidden from public view. The vast ocean ahead of him looked daunting at first. Deep breaths soothed any fear he had. Tyrion would prove to his father that he could do this.

A pat on his shoulder startles him and Tyrion quickly turns to find Barristan. Behind him, Ashara is making her way aboard with a few Starfall knights that would be accompanying her for safety.

“Are you sure it’ll be okay that Lady Dayne is accompanying us?”

Not liking the idea much either, Barristan sighs. “It shouldn’t make much of a difference. From here it will be a straight voyage to Volantis. She’s rightfully suspicious.”

The question was out of his mouth before Tyrion could reel it back in. “Why are you still in the Kingsguard?” Aerys is a bad man. Everyone knows how unstable he is.” Resentment was laced in there and looking at Tyrion’s cold eyes made Barristan feel uncomfortable. The real question was ‘why do you still protect my sister’s murderer?’

“I took the oath before Aerys became king. Under his father Jahaerys. A lifelong vow of loyalty. As long as I am alive, I am to defend and protect whoever sits on the Iron Throne. No matter what. . . To do otherwise would be treasonous.” He tried to explain to Tyrion, but even Selmy knew how pathetic it sounded. He resented himself for still serving Aerys, what could he do though? If he were to go back on his oath, Selmy would possibly be stripped of his knighthood; even executed.

“Your vow is more important than your morality.” Flatly claimed Tyrion.

Irked, he glares at the young boy. “What do you know of morality? You’re just a boy.”

“That may be so, but I know the difference between right and wrong.” Briefly he remembers Cersei’s voice talking quietly with another. Scheming and plotting. That is what Tyrion heard throughout Casterly Rock when he was left to his own devices. Supporting a man that killed innocent people on a whim was definitely wrong.

Before Selmy could even come up with a reply, Ashara interrupts them. “The captain says the weather bodes well for us. If the winds are kind we should be there in a week or two.”

Barristan stiffly nods. “Thank you, my lady. We couldn’t do this without you.” From the dock he could make out Allyria Dayne and the pale haired Edric who happily waved at the ship’s passengers. “Will Starfall be okay without you?”

“Do not worry about Starfall. It is in good hands.”

The yelling of the dockhands up to the crew alerts them that the ship is about to set sail. A childish sense of wonder seizes Tyrion as he watches the sailors hurriedly get to work. The hubbub of commands was enthralling as they stood off to the side.

“Is this your first time sailing, Vaiko?”

“Yes my lady.” His glittering eyes are still trained on the busy crew. The joy of a child was infectious as both Ashara and Barristan enjoyed gazing at Tyrion. Another painful reminder to the knight of the boy’s restricted upbringing. He was experiencing so much; things that anyone else at that age had already experienced.

“Why do you look sad?” Her question makes Selmy jump partially as he had been stuck in his own melancholy thoughts.

He tells the partial truth. “Before becoming my squire, Vaiko didn’t have a good life. His father resented him due to his dwarfism and hid him away from the world.”

Brows furrow looking at the happy boy now. “How terrible. Some people are so small minded, especially in Westeros.”

Not disagreeing with that statement, guilt starts to ebb at him; recalling how Tyrion had glared at him accusingly moments ago.

Sailing away from Starfall’s docks, it soon becomes but a small blur behind them. Now for the difficult part of their journey. Sitting and doing nothing for a week. It’ll at least give Tyrion a good opportunity to practice his sword play and maybe Selmy could teach him how to properly utilize that small knife of his as well. In a fight, a knife wasn’t completely useless, just tricky and possibly dangerous if one doesn’t know what they’re doing. The most important thing was adapting to Tyrion’s height and teaching him how to utilize it to his advantage. Barristan prided himself on his patience that helped greatly in figuring out a proper training lesson for Tyrion. He would not fail this boy like his father had. When they returned to Westeros, Tyrion would have everything he needed to survive on his own.

Taglist:

@boywivlove

@esposadomd

@domoron

@yentroucnagol

#reader insert #reader insert fanfiction #game of thrones reader insert #game of thrones x reader #game of thrones fanfic #game of thrones fanfiction #asoiaf reader insert #asoiaf fanfiction #asoiaf fic #asoiaf fanfic #asoiaf fandom #a song of ice and fire x you #a song of ice and fire x reader #a song of ice and fire fanfic #a song of ice and fire fanfiction

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lazlolullaby · 2 years

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2012 VS Human!2018 TMNT Concept - Two Households, Both Alike in Ninja-Awesomeness

A fusion of 2012 TMNT and RoTTMNT. Set in the 2012 universe with all the drama that entails.

In 03 there was a Mystic Foot Clan branch. 2012 didn’t have much mystic stuff. So I’m just splicing Lou Jitsu/Rottmnt boys in because hells yeah.

HUGE LORE UNDER THE CUT~

Basically, ROTTMNT Splinter was part of the Mystic side of the Foot Clan. In 2012, Every Single Foot Clan member was killed due to the feud. It was due to some serious luck and stealth that Oroku Sho, who married in, was able to save his daughter Atsuko and toddler grandson Daisuke (means “big help”. This was chosen to be said in the most sarcastic tone possible.). They trained him to be a fighter, to hold their Mystic techniques and traditions and overcome the Hamato Clan with supernatural-styled vengeance.

Atsuko was on the trail, trying to find weaknesses of the Hamato, but she was killed defending her family. Instead of taking that grief and hardening his resolve, it breaks Daisuke. It makes him look at his family history in a new light; as a never-ending cycle of violence. He sees himself as alone – and despite his grandfather’s resolve in saying that “justice and our ancestors are with you, you will succeed in destroying the Hamatos”, he is just one person VS a fully-prepared Clan.

So he slips. If it is his destiny, it will happen no matter what, right? He tells his grandfather that “acting is just a hobby, I have to do something with my life and farming is too boring.” There was a hot girl summer where Teenage Yoshi + Saki + Daisuke hung out. They all got parts as stunt extras on a martial arts movie. He confronts Patriarch Hamato, tells him in no uncertain terms that he is the last, will remain the last and concedes defeat.

Changes his name to Lou Bauza, (Westernized name order, named after his VA, which coincidentally sounds like “Bowser”, fitting as a sometimes enemy of Yoshi.) starts a film career in Japan, then moves to America. Flashforward 10-ish years and had an accident on “Hot Soup Forever”. Had to stop acting and currently has chronic pain and fatigue. Walks with a cane on bad days. He ended up doing at home translation work for video games. When his fame dried up, he realized he didn’t have anything to come home to.

His apartment complex said “no turtles, rats, dogs, or cats”, so. He decided he wanted a child and adopts the two year old Raymond. He’s a mixed African-Latino child, temperamental but with Lou’s patience he softens up. Lou’s accent makes his name sound like Raimundo, “rai” being is Japanese for “Thunder”. They live together happily for about a year.

Then Saki shows back up, tells him that the Foot Clan has been restored, the Hamatos have been vanquished. Join me with our Clan back in our Homeland, it’s your birthright.

Lou is – angry, worried, threatened by the fact that he left that life behind is coming back to pull him in. He convinces Saki that he’s been playing the long game and waiting for Saki to learn of his heritage.

Lou ends up convincing Saki to fund a Dance Academy as a front for the American Foot Clan. It’s a lie, but he’s able to pull it off whenever Saki calls or anyone checks up on him. Knowing the history of his family, how badly the Shredder title makes people vicious, he knows that his time is limited.

So Lou decides that, “Fine. I might die because of my family, but Rai doesn’t deserve to be alone.” so. More kids.

He got Ryan (African, autistic and semi-verbal – goes by Othello because heck yeck Shakespeare) and Justice (Japanese-Brazillian, Usually called by his nickname “Blue” because once he figured out his gender, he kept changing his name every two days) as a two for one, because Blue would “translate” for his “twin”.

Then Angelo (African-Latino) followed Blue home from preschool one day. Lou tried to find his parents but – yeah he’s an orphan too, and the kids already bonded so.

April follows Ryan home when they were ten and just when Lou was thinking it’s going to be another Angelo situation her parents show up. They’re very excited that she has friends. Cassandra Jones was once a Girl Scout rivalry, but they bonded over fighting and now they’re friends.

The Bauza family lives in the second floor above the dance academy. There’s noise coming from below all hours of the day, Lou has it muffled with carpets and rugs. Because Lou is convinced that the Shredder will come after his family, he subtly trains them in the arts of ninjutsu. As fun family games, because he doesn’t want to worry them and he doesn’t want them to resent him. Like ninja hide and go seek, the Lair games, mimicking Lou Jitsu movies, etc.

Lou has the Mystic Ability to convert ordinary objects into corresponding weapons. Like Karai and the Hamato Ninpo in 2018. At first he was proud of it, but eventually he thinks it to be curse. After many years of meditation and training, he was able to do the reverse, becoming able to convert weapons into ordinary objects.

Every weapon that Blue brought in Lou would take and change it. Steel fan into paper fan, rings into tambourines, a sword into an umbrella, an axe to a squeaky hammer, Sai into a spatula, ninja stars into glow in the dark stars, etc. As a reference to the 2003 Turtles – swords into toilet plungers, sai into spoons, bo staff into a broom, and nunchucks into toilet scrubbers.

Lou thought that the ability wouldn’t be passed on because he didn’t have any biological children. However, their strong bonds caused their own personal Mystic Abilities to show up in all of his kids. (including April and Cassandra.) Only Blue can do the weapon conversion, but he’s yet to learn how to change them back, matching 2012!Leo’s Healing Hands. Lou tries to impress on them that Ninja isn’t a valid career choice and to have back ups and other options.

Then 2012 rolls around. The Shredder shows up in New York. Shredder is not seeing the extreme lack of Foot Clan recruits in NYC because he’s focusing on the Hamato Clan being alive. He trusts Lou to run the Japanese branch of the Foot Clan while he “stamps out the survivors.”

Lou does not care that Yoshi might be alive and with a Clan. Lou sees his chance to end the cycle himself. So he subtly starts to run the Foot Clan into the ground through terrible management.

2012!Karai shows up and has a few hangouts with the Bauza boys. It becomes clear that they have different parental standards. The boys are torn between being afraid of her and wanting to protect her from her terrible Dad.

It becomes funny how much that Lou is destroying the Foot Clan when he’s supposed to be protecting it. It’s even funnier when Shredder doesn’t even notice, getting more and more angry with “some Turtles” that get into his way.

Shredder sends Lou to fight the Turtles. Lou panics because “Wow Yokai exist – oh no they’re the same age as my boys!” and he’s on the defensive. Thanks to his chronic fatigue, he nearly loses to the 2012 Turtles. Rai, Ryan, Blue, and Angelo show up to defend him, rushing out in their civilian clothes. They all pair up against their counterpart.

Ryan goes, “Purple’s my favorite color – let me do this!” and attacks Donatello. Their bo staffs are matching up, but Ryan has a little more technique, able to stay back and not allowing purple turtle to get hits in.

“Woah, you’re named Leo? Like – is that short for something? Leandro? Lorenzo? Leonidas?” Blue asks, their huge odachi clashing against the twin katanas.

“Leonardo.” the turtle spits out.

“Cool because I’ve been looking for a new name, and I don’t want repeats.” he turns and shouts to the paired off siblings, “Guess what~ I’m neon Leon~”

“Great but we need to get Pops outta here – Tell me you’re charged up!” Rai shouts over the din, sai twisting the tonfa out of his hands. Mystic energy wraps around his fist and pummels the red-banded turtle, knocking him to the wall.

Orange turtle and Angelo are sitting on the ground and trying to untangle their weapons. “Can you put your whole body in your shell?”, “Not without help.”

Anyway – the Bauza boys get away. Since Lou isn’t awake to get a bad boss punishment from Shredder, Rai gets a punch. Leon makes sure that he’s bandaged up. They’re also freaking out, realizing that “it’s not just a game” and “Pops was teaching them how to stay safe”.

Lou wakes up, hugs them, talks to them about their family. The cycle of violence, the fact that everything he’s been doing has been trying to end this. “While I wasn’t sure that the Hamato Clan would be coming back, I knew that the Shredder coming for us was very real.” The boys create their ninja outfits and dedicate themselves to getting better so they won’t have to go through this again.

The turtles go back to see Master Splinter. Splinter explains that the Mystic family was always a support to the Shredder. That their abilities were rival to the Hamato Clan’s own Healing Hands.

Lou learns that Rai took his punishment and starts to get really mad. With his kid’s help, they devise a plan. Because the Shredder is so focused on the Hamato Clan, he’ll make him listen by setting up an ambush.

Since Lou needs as much energy as possible, their last day before the ambush is filled with a movie marathon, naps and karaoke. If this is the last time that they’re a whole family, they’re going to enjoy it.

Big fight happens, Lou is able to chain up Shredder so he can have a face to face talk. “You don’t check up on me enough.”

The Hamato Clan shows up and he also chains them up.

Rai pops up. “Hang tight. Shreddy isn’t returning our calls, so we figure dangling his sworn enemies in front of him is a good way to make him listen.

“We’re about to have $500 worth of therapy for the low cost of a half-hour of your time.” Leon says

“We are both Foot Clan. But you know? There is a difference between us.”

“You lacked the drive to take down the Hamatos? Any discipline to raise your sons as warriors? You’re a disgrace to this family.”

“You had a family. You had the Hamato behind you. You had Yoshi beside you. And you still destroyed it.”

“They were Hamato!”

“Then they followed you into the Foot – without question!” Lou stomps his foot. “If I’m the only one who sees that – hypocrisy, then I suppose I’m the only one who’s done anything about it.”

Shredder is not paying attention. He’s looking at the Rat Yokai that just broke in. “Seriously?” he said. “I just confessed that I took down your entire Clan and you don’t even look at me?” He binds up Splinter. “I’ve got a limited time. I’ll set you both loose and you can chase each other, Mr. Rat.”

Shredder starts laughing. “Why are you turning your back to an enemy? That’s Hamato Yoshi.”

Lou stops. Blinks. Does a double take. Makes a joke about how Splinter still looks hot. There’s a chorus of “eewws” from the Bauza boys and Mikey.

“Alright, since you’re not paying attention – You never do.” he sighed. “You had a family. You’ve always had a Clan. Do you know how much I wanted that?”

April’s steel fan comes out and he converts it into a paper fan. “You! Stupid! Fool! You could have had a loving family, and you fight! You always do! You have brought both Clans to their end – and I don’t want any further part in it!” He turns to look between them. “I’m not letting you destroy my family with our feud. I will not pursue you or my clan’s vengeance. If you want to kill me for your sake, I will defend myself. This cycle ends with me.”

Anyway the 2018 boys disappear. There’s a fight, but it stops.

They only come back once in a while as background characters. Then they show up as extra fighters in Karai’s New Foot Clan. Lou doesn’t know. Lou will be pissed.

So in 2012 there were certain parallels. If Leo = Splinter (dutiful son), and Raphael = Shredder (angrily focused on the wrong thing), then Michelangelo = Lou Jitsu (has talent but doesn’t use it properly).

#tmnt #tmnt crossover #tmnt 2012 #rottmnt #lou jitsu #splinter rottmnt #shredder 2012 #Lazlo's lulls #that was a lot of bandwith in my brain #just pick out what you want

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thornaelle · 2 years

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CW: Mental health talk, with apologies to everyone who's followed me in the last few months and is (still) not getting the content they expected.

TL;DR I'm struggling with my mental health and have been for A While, currently several months into treatment, things are getting better but art is hard and making art for other people is just not happening right now. If you were on my commission list you should have had an email from me.

I don’t talk about myself much —or at all, really— but my mental health has been pretty abysmal for a very long time. I started trying to tackle it early this year; I was so exhausted by crying all the time and hating myself and my life that I finally caved and went to the doctor. I'd been trying to for years, but always talked myself out of it for one nonsense reason or another. I never really believed that I deserved help, or that I was bad enough to need it, and particularly in the last couple of hell years I felt like I shouldn’t waste anyone’s time with my sadness when there were so much more important things going on and people with “real” problems were dying. There’s still a bit of me that feels that way.

But that’s probably just extra evidence that I'm depressed.

I've been on medication for several months now and things are still up and down, but slowly getting better. The ups are far more plentiful and the downs are not nearly so low as they were. I’m still struggling with motivation and I'm still really tired, but it's not from crying for hours a day any more. It’s been so long since “normal” that I’m not sure what it looked like on me, but I’m beginning to believe that I might be heading there. I may even have glimpsed it a couple of times.

Art has often felt like the only thing I have —and don’t get me wrong, it does bring me joy— but it's been such a struggle for such a long time. It takes me days, weeks or even months to finish small pieces, and it makes me so frustrated because I love drawing, but there always seems to be a point where my enjoyment stalls and it suddenly becomes an impossible slog; but I still feel like I have to get it done even if I hate it and never want to see it again afterwards. It's still a struggle now, but I think it’s starting to get better. I've been drawing for myself a bit- I made a little self portrait icon and then drew a whole load of OCs to match, and I've been making some character sheets, I started a Pathfinder campaign with some friends so obviously I've been drawing my PC (she's a pink tiefling swashbuckler and I love her), and I've done lots of doodling that went no where and that was ok. It's been pretty nice.

But I feel guilty as hell because it’s not work.

I opened commissions way back in December largely out of a feeling of obligation, because I kept on saying I would; in the summer, in September, then late-September, September-October, definitely October, maybe November- and kept not getting around to it; and then I crashed hard as soon as I did. I had myself convinced that everything was fine up until then, or fine enough (spoilers: it was not), and I could totally do them, but I haven’t done any of them, I haven’t even confirmed them. I kept telling myself “next week I will be up to it” but of course that next week when everything is magically better has yet to materialize. I feel incredibly guilty about it, and it only gets worse with each “next week” that passes. I’m so sorry to everyone I’ve disappointed.

I want to be able to pick them up again, but I have to be patient and realistic with myself; and realistically I’m just not in that place yet. Forcing myself to do them is only going to undo what progress I’ve made. I need to be kind to myself and get comfortable with my own expectations for a while, without running myself into the ground trying to meet those of others too. I tried "pushing through" for years and it was destroying me. So my commissions are on hold, for the moment. I want to do them —for those that still want them, I don't blame anyone who doesn't, I realise that I do not look super reliable right now— but when I am in a better place for it, so I can do both them and myself justice.

I don't really know if I'm going to start posting personal art again in the meantime. I do miss it! I miss seeing likes and reblogs and everyone's tags. But I also do not miss the accompanying pressure. It might be that I'll do better with that now, but I don't know. I'm hesitant to find out. I do have a zine piece from last year that I can post now, so maybe that'll be my test re-entry.

So that's where I am and where I've been. I'm genuinely feeling better now than I have done in years —maybe decades— but the difference has really put how very not well I was doing into sharp focus. I spent most of last August crying; I'm hoping not to do that this year.

Thanks for sticking with me, and I hope I can start sharing art again some time in the not too distant future ♡

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behaein · 1 year

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hi, everyone! it’s just me (chaerin’s mun) back with a second muse! i wanted to bring in someone different, so unlike chaerin, haein’s a lot more spunkier and goofier! she’s got that firecracker energy, and she actually wants to be an idol as well. i have her profile page up, but anything else you need to know about her will be in this intro post. as always, please do like this post to plot or come bother me with all your thoughts and ideas!

before i begin, i’ll say that haein goes by both hailey and haein! it depends on whichever language you begin to speak with her. nevertheless, she doesn’t mind either one!

her background first: hailey haein oh was born in seattle, washington to an engineering professor and a chef! has an older and younger brother. all in all, let’s just say that hailey was the only one to not win the academic lottery! she was not as smart as her parents or older brother, and it became pretty evident that she’ll never be on their level! not to say that she got like d’s and f’s, but she wasn’t going to graduate in the top 5% yknow

her parents didn’t care too much though, and they continued to support her in trying to find something she’d like. has gone through gymnastics, was a cheerleader in junior high and high school (or at least as much as she attended), so she’s always been an active dancer!

when she’s in high school, a casting manager from a npc company in korea picks her up and asks if she’ll like to audition. she does and they offer her a spot as a trainee. parents are glad she’s found something she can do and shift her off to korea!

when she was training, she lived at a dorm with the other trainees, but her legal guardian was always her maternal aunt! a run-down of maternal aunt: always wanted to be a musician but her parents said no, so she became a pharmacist instead. however, she’s still super passionate about music so her and haein went along great

right before the group is supposed to debut, about three girls get cut from the lineup with one of them being haein. it’s kind of a shocker for her because she’s had a pretty easy life until then. plus, she moved all the way to korea, dropped out of high school (she found it difficult to juggle that and training together) and got her ged instead so like... what now?

that all happened within the last three months, so now she’s been working as a part-timer at cgv, the movie theater, and she also does some english tutoring at the side. she thought about moving back to america, but her aunt convinces her to continue pursuing her dream!! dropped out of high school anyway so what’s she going to do back in america?

hailey agrees so here she is!! trying to debut somehow!!

so timeline with years to break it down: 2002 (born) -> gets casted and moves to korea summer of 2020 -> trains until september 2022 where she gets cut from the debut lineup -> and then current day where she lives with her aunt and works part time jobs

personality: she’s super extroverted and goofy! simply just wants to live a good life, kind of lives the yolo lifestyle. up for being friends with anybody as long as they make her laugh. she sort of gets affected by the people around her and act the way they do when she’s around them! haein’s like slime, she can sort of melt into any situation and personality as long as it means getting along with those around her because she finds fun in socializing with people. you can catch her just sitting at cafes on her own, people watching because she thinks that’s interesting

possible plot ideas: people she tutors in english, those she meets at dance classes because she’s taking them to not forget how to move, those she meet at like a korean american community thing within korea, someone who likes seeing movies so they always see her at cgv and you share movie recs with one another, you can talk kpop with her because she loves her groups (esp girl groups) and anything else!! i’m open to everything, and haein’s a super flexible muse so!

#( * ♡ : ooc. )#be:intro

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jonwongton · 2 years

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05/14/22: 그해 우리는 (Our Beloved Summer)

I’ve been going through a stressful time, and when I’m mentally burned out but not ready to sleep, I try to unwind by rewatching a show. But sometimes, I feel like I’m living too much in the past and not making any new memories if I just want to indulge in old ones. Jiheon talked about this drama a lot and I heard some good things about it, so I finally gave it a go.

I really really enjoyed the whole thing. Soft romance dramas are my favorite, and the whole childhood innocence/nostalgic vibe that carries over into adulthood really hits home for me. I also like drams where the character relationships are already decided, and the plot is driven more by how they navigate situations. It was kinda like descendants of the sun where the leads couldn’t be together because of circumstance, and a lot less like a drama where the second male lead has more interactions with the female lead (Kim Woo Bin and Park Shin Hye?).

The first six-ish episodes had me so hooked. I really liked the writing and how a lot of the events didn’t feel forced. Also I’m really fond of the character development. The best characters to me are the ones that have flaws and the story explains why they’re the way they are, and I felt that about Yeon-su and Ung. She was really selfish and cold to mask all her insecurities, and he was really apathetic to everything because he felt he was living a borrowed life.

I feel like after episode 12-ish? the plot just dragged on once they got back together but I still enjoyed watching it. Yeon-su matured a lot more and let herself be vulnerable with Ung, and Ung finally confronted all the worries that were running his life for all those years.

I wouldn’t count these as loose ends, but there were some parts of the plot that I feel like they coulda elaborated a bit more on:

Ung’s biological father and how he was adopted into his current family

What happened to Yeon-su’s parents

The reason Ji-ung’s mom treated him that way (because the reason they gave felt really uncompelling)

And I was really hoping for a scene where Yeon-su is honest with Ung about why she broke up with him for the first time, but I can live with Ung figuring it out himself and accepting her the way she is.

Some of my favorite scenes:

When Ung talked about how cold Yeon-su was to everyone, but how he was the only one that knew about her special side. It was the scene where she showered him with cherry blossoms

When Yeon-su took Ung on that day trip and kept ignoring his questions. It was like her most genuine way of showing him love at the time

When Yeon-su’s CEO gave her the job because he was depicted as a goofy guy the whole drama but he really changed her life with that job offer

When Ji-ung convinces Yeon-su to do the documentary, not for the money or fame, but because it’s priceless to document a specific time in your life. I was thinking about this scene for days

When Yeon-su flames the team leader for not telling Ung he was going to do a collaborative drawing exhibition with Nua, and how empathy is linked to intelligence and you’re not good at your job if you don’t consider other people’s feelings

The whole day where Ung wants to be friends but Yeon-su is like friend-shading him. I thought it was a cute way to show they both obviously had feelings for each other but didn’t know how to go about it

When Ung ran away on that day, Yeon-su found him, and he finally tells her how much he missed her over the past five years. I felt this scene really did their relationship justice because I don’t think Yeon-su was at the point where she could have started this interaction herself

(I guess they all have Kim Dami in them lol)

Anyways, I’m really glad I gave this a watch. It’ll be a nice, soft drama that’ll take me back to spring 2022.

#kdrama

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themelancholyhill · 10 months

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I’m feeling better now that I’ve put some distance between that day and today. It was extremely difficult to finish that shift. When i got into bed that night, i told myself that it was ok, no one died and if no one caught the error it would have been fine actually. It turned out that the thing i didn’t do because i forgot to check what i was supposed to didn’t need to be done anyway. I had a bad day, we all get those. I told myself not to overlook the 99% of the other things i did manage to do. I’m trying to be more patient and kind to myself, it’s part of my therapy. It’s hard. Very very hard.

But let’s talk about you.

What do you mean “he got upset and stopped talking to me”? Did he say those exact words to you? If he did not, how did you arrive at this conclusion? We often self-blame way too quickly and assume that the other’s reactions to us is due to something we did. Based on my personal experience, it is untrue almost all of the time. Someone’s attitude and actions say more about what they’re going through than they do about us. But if what you say is true, that he really did get so offended by your joke that he stopped wanting to talk to you, then it’s a good thing. He obviously wasn’t mature enough to get that a joke is a joke, or even if he was offended, that a friendship with you was far more important than the misunderstanding of a joke. Being “good” or “bad” isn’t contingent on your interactions with people. I think i’m a good person, but i often dismiss my loved ones, i forget important dates, i’ve had my share of dead male friendships, i’ve hurt a friend i really loved and now i can’t talk to her anymore, i’ve done things i’m not proud of, all of that is the result of my lived experience, i am not a bad person just because i’ve made mistakes and poor decisions. You are not a bad person. There is no one that is all good, and there is no one that is all bad.

We may never know why this guy stopped talking to you. Relationships are voluntary, he isn’t obligated to talk to you or keep talking to you. Though hurtful, this sudden disinterest isn’t a crime. You’re not responsible for how he reacts to you. You are not a bad person. YOU ARE NOT A BAD PERSON.

The joke was a test to see if he was worthy to be in your circle of friends, he failed.

Be kind and patient with yourself. Have a lovely and delightful day, my friend.

V✖️

It's wonderful to know that you're feeling better now. Bad days happen and as difficult as it is, it's important to keep in mind that it'll pass eventually.

As for that guy, I admit that I was quick to jump to conclusions. My brain switched on overthinking mode instantly which proves that our mind is quick to blind our perception and convince us of the most terrible things about ourselves. Now, this is quite embarrassing, but the guy texted me back to congratulate me for passing the year. Apparently, he calmed down and chose not to be confrontational about it which explains why he was quick to dismiss the conversation, which is great tbh. Again, our mind is but a treacherous being. Healing from a heartbreak is really hard and moving on is even harder.

Your take on being a good or bad person is on point. Do you believe in doing good for the sake of doing good only?? I'm working on it actually!

I'm truly grateful to have you as my friend despite the distance. You cannot imagine how much your words mean the world to me and I'm not exaggerating (or maybe this is a better way to exaggerate). Have a wonderful day and if you have time, you can tell me about your plans for this summer.

I'm currently listening to this song by an Egyptian singer whose voice is just as smooth as butter. It's a +40 minute song but it takes you to a journey which I believe that's what music should do!

#asks #V✖

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theendofachapter · 1 year

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Yeah.. it still hurts. Not as much as before.. but it still stings. Thought these wounds were finally healing.. and then it’s like they were ripped wide open again. I need to stop doing this to myself. I know she blocked my number and the one little ounce of hope that maybe she would reach out to talk about what happened and why she doesn’t even want to talk to me anymore would be through discord.. and I saw that she had deleted me as a friend. I would check it everyday hoping to see a message from her.. when inside I knew i shouldn’t be doing that to myself.. still holding onto hope. It’s pathetic really.. wanting to fix even something as simple as a friendship with someone who clearly wants nothing to do with me. I just wish I knew why.. and how it got to this point. I think my ego is hurt, and that’s why I feel this incessant need to know what I did.. Does she hate me? I just don’t know anymore.. I honestly can’t think of anything I did that made her hate me this much. One of the last texts she sent me she accused me of manipulating her from the get go.. Does she really think I would do that to her? That I did everything in hopes of just wanting to sleep with her? After knowing her past? Jesus.. how can everything have gotten so twisted. Yes I did like her.. but I never had a plan and meticulously did things in hopes that she would “fall” for me. I had put my feelings aside and just wanted to be a friend to her when she really needed one. Was she mad that I defended her and spoke badly about her ex? From what I knew.. what else was I supposed to do? Just watch her put herself down like that time and time again like it doesn’t hurt seeing her do that to herself? So I finally spoke up.. every time he was brought up, which was every time we hung out.. I never made a single comment. And when there was hard proof that he didn’t even care what he did to her.. I couldn’t take it anymore. If that’s not what a friend does then I don’t know.. even if I didn’t have feelings for her, of course I’d still take her side. She said I was “biased” towards the situation.. but everyone is biased. From my perspective, I saw a girl who was trying to justify what her ex did to her was acceptable.. and that she didn’t deserve more, that she wasn’t worth more. I don’t know.. it sort of feels like she’s convinced herself that i had bad intentions and I didn’t care about her at all. That I faked everything.. that i never wanted to genuinely help. I just wish she would have communicated with me before cutting me out.. I’ve told her so many times I can’t read her mind.. and well … looks like I really couldn’t. Everything just points to her hating me.. why else would she not even want to speak to me.. I really shouldn’t be hung up on this.. I shouldn’t give her this much of my time when i probably don’t even cross her mind. It just sucks knowing that all along I was no one to her. Not even a friend. Less than a stranger.

I’ve decided that I’m going to save up as much as I can this summer and move back to cali in the fall. I need to get away from everyone.. a fresh start. Vegas sucks.. and it breeds the type of people that I don’t want to become. I’m going to take advantage of the opportunities out here until then.. I really hope I get a call back from any of the day clubs out here.. been out on so many auditions.. and it really made me realize how superficial Vegas is. It’s like cattle, everyone’s lining up in their baiting suits to get in front of a panel just to be judged. My current job sucks.. my hours keep getting cut, and the other job I’m starting doesn’t look like they get too busy, at least it’s more bartending experience. I’m going to try and juggle 3 if I can land one of the day clubs. My goal is to just save.. a one track mind so that I can move back and resume where I left off. Just sucks.. I would have rather put things aside and built something with her instead if things had turned out differently. I don’t think I can ever get over her if I’m being honest. I can lie to myself all I want, and watch all the videos on letting go.. but at the end of the day.. shes still the last thing I think about before I go to sleep.

I thought she had quit and that I wasn’t going to see her ever again.. but she’s working this Sunday. At least that means she’s healthy enough to work again. One of the co workers asked me where she’s been, and said that she knows we hang out a lot.. I always thought no one knew. I wonder if she knows I had feelings for her and was rejected.. I told her that she hasn’t responded to me too.. and I know my face got really red.. it was so embarrassing.. I could feel my face just warming up. I wonder if she’ll ignore me if I say hi to her this Sunday.. part of me wants to call out and avoid that situation.. but I can’t keep running and call out every time we have a shift together.. and of course that song came on as I’m finishing this.. fml really.

Tomorrow will be exactly a month since I’ve seen her.. who knew that would be the last time I’d be considered a friend. There were no indicators that she didn’t want to hangout anymore leading up to that day.. I thought if anything we had a lot of fun even though they were hospital trips and errands for meds.. but looking back now and rereading the texts from that day.. it’s like she planned it.. for me to come over to finish the last few episodes of Alice in borderlands so that she could cut me out. Man.. that means.. that day she knew what she was doing.. I wonder if she felt relieved once I left for work that day. I was so blind.. why couldn’t she just be upfront. I’ve always been direct with everything, why couldn’t she just tell me she didn’t want to hangout anymore.. instead of.. this. I’m feeling all this again and I don’t know what to think anymore.

1.25.22

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likeshipsonthesea · 3 years

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mianmian gets to the lan sect lectures, discovers very quickly that every one of her peers has decided to use this time to figure out how quickly they can get into bed with someone of the opposite sex, and decides almost immediately that she has to pick a suitably unattainable guy to have a crush on.

the thing is, mianmian is lanling jin’s head disciple. she is capable, intelligent, and very very gay. the last of these things she isn’t exactly keen on telling people yet for a variety of reasons up to and including jin zixuan will be so awkward and stubbornly supportive about it and she doesn’t know how to deal with that yet

so when her friends giggle over the other young masters and finally turn to mianmian-- who’s trying to memorize at least some of the fifty-thousand rules before their quiz tomorrow--and they ask her, “who do you like, mianmian?” she says the name that she carefully picked out of a handful of options.

“lan-er-gongzi,” she says, without looking up from her textbook, and she assumes that will be the end of it.

lan wangji is both incredibly attractive and unrelentingly resistant to all attempts to flirt with him. she, like half the other female cultivators, can moon over him (or pretend to moon over him) all they want and nothing will come of it. it’s perfect. she’s a genius. the worst she’ll have to do now is pretend to be infatuated with him when her friends start gossiping. it’s fool proof.

spoiler: it’s not

it’s not, no, because her friends are horrible and immediately start gossiping about it to everyone, and usually mianmian wouldn’t care but then jin zixuan finds out. jin zixuan, whose marriage complex is being brought to center stage with the forced proximity to his bride-to-be. jin zixuan, who for some reason decided he has to live his stolen crush-addled youth vicariously through his only real friend that isn’t related to him. jin zixuan, who for some godforsaken reason takes it upon himself to contrive situations for mianmian and lan wangji to be alone together incessantly.

it unfortunately takes mianmian longer than she would like to figure out what’s happening. she’d give herself a break for it-- she was being responsible and studying, thank you very much-- but she doesn’t have much sympathy for her own stupidity seeing as she’s currently locked in a section of the lan library with the second jade of lan

and suddenly, suddenly she’s just so fucking tired. of studying, yeah, the tests here are brutal and there’s no one to bribe to make sure she doesn’t lose points on stupid things, but also tired of lying to the people she loves and tired of training this hard and being an amazing cultivator only for people to care more about her eventual marriage-- to a man of all things!-- and also, let’s be real here, she’s been in lectures with beautiful capable intelligent women for like months and she’s losing her gay ass mind

and so maybe, possibly, as she’s locked in a library with a clearly confused and annoyed second jade of lan she kind of, momentarily, loses it and rants all of this at his steadily widening eyes

at the end of it, she realizes with no small amount of panic that she’s just confessed not only her attraction to women but the fact that she’s been letting wen qing’s ears of all things distract her from her studies. if anything, she’s sure lan wangji will fault her for inattention

but the second jade of lan, after a drawn-out moment filled only with mianmian’s labored breathing and rising panic, simply says, “i understand.”

mianmian stops. she squints. she tilts her head. she squints some more. lan wangji’s ears go pink and just like that she realizes -- “you’re a cut-sleeve.”

lan wangji’s ears go even pinker. he doesn’t nod, or agree, or outwardly react in any way, but mianmian is a capable, intelligent cultivator, and she’s sure of it.

mianmian sighs with a relief she didn’t know she could feel. “thank the gods.”

lan wangji doesn’t seem to know what to make of this response, or mianmian’s increasingly frequent trips to the library following their conversation, or mianmian’s staunch determination to befriend the guy, but that’s alright. mianmian is old hat at befriending awkward sect heirs by this point.

it’s not like lan wangji expressed any desire for her friendship, but the prospect of not being the only one with absolutely no interest in the straight shenanigans happening at gusu lan summer camp is enough to let mianmian ignore his obvious confusion. lan wangji is a great listener and only sometimes blushes when mianmian waxes poetic about the beautiful women she’s forced to surround herself with every day

“no but you don’t understand,” mianmian insists, alone in the library with lan wangji, “jiang-guniang asked me to help her with a sword form. i put my hands on her waist. i said something idiotic bc she was so pretty and right there and then she laughed. lan wangji. i’m in love.”

“yesterday you were in love with wen-guniang,” lan wangji says as he impassively turns a page in his book. “has this changed?”

“no, i’m in love with both of them. all of them. lan wangji. they’re all so pretty all the time. it’s horrible.”

lan wangji presses his lips into a firmer line, which mianmian’s come to understand means he’s repressing a smile. “i’m sorry to hear it brings luo-guniang such trouble.”

mianmian groans, fairly undignified, but that’s a lost cause with lan wangji at this point anyway. “i swear, if jin zixuan says one more bad thing about her i’m going to punch him and marry her myself.”

lan wangji says, “mn,” which mianmian takes to mean that he supports her in this line of thinking, which she finds both quite sweet and ridiculously funny.

grinning, she teases, “lan-er-gongzi, if i do end up marrying jiang-guniang, will you bear witness to our elopement?”

lan wangji’s lips press again, this time in the way that means he’s repressing a frown. “jiang-guniang’s brothers wouldn’t allow for an elopement,” he says.

mianmian huffs. “as if yunmeng or lanling will deign to host our wedding.”

lan wangji appears to ponder this for a moment before he says, “gusu will host it,” and it’s at that moment that mianmian realizes she’s actually gone and fucking befriended the second jade of lan.

what is her life.

of course, it’s not long after that that she goes to find jin zixuan and explain that she can’t make their weekly sparring match today because she has plans with lan wangji (jiang yanli tenderly brushed some of mianmian’s hair away from her forehead while they were working on sword forms and if mianmian doesn’t tell someone about it she’s literally going to explode) and she’s trying to be as polite as possible only for jin zixuan to scoff and pout (”i don’t pout”) and say, “i never took you for one of those women who throw themselves so wantonly at a man”

it’s only for having been friends with this absolutely horrible communicator for most of her life that she doesn’t immediately punch him in the face. “what did you just say to me,” she demands, but jin zixuan just sets his jaw and looks away, flushing down his neck in the way his mother describes as unbecoming and--

and mianmian suddenly realizes that her ridiculous best friend is jealous of lan wangji.

(in a friend way, of course, he’s like her brother, the one time his mother implied that he ought not get too close to women in case it jeopardizes his betrothal to jiang yanli, he insisted he didn’t have any female friends repeatedly as his mother delicately danced around outright saying mianmian’s name until finally she broke and jin zixuan was basically like huh?? mianmian doesn’t count?? she made me eat dirt like six times when we were kids)

the sheer ridiculousness of jin zixuan, to set her up with a guy and then get jealous when she spends all her time with him

and fuck her, but she loves her stupid awkward ridiculous sect heir best friend and she doesn’t want him to think she’s gone and left him for someone else (gods know jin zixuan’s loyalty complex rivals his marriage one (on second thought the two might be connected)) and so, after making a few quick decisions, mianmian grabs her stupid best friend by the wrist and pulls him to the library

he protests all the way there, but he’s been letting her drag him wherever she wants since they were five and it isn’t as if he’s going to break the pattern now. she drags him to the library and sits him down across a startled lan wangji and then finally breaks and gushes about jiang-guniang’s fingertips brushing her forehead and doesn’t look at jin zixuan once the whole time

lan wangji, on the other hand, sends jin zixuan frequent glances, as if worried on mianmian’s behalf, which is super sweet and also how the fuck did mianmian get two awkward sect heirs to care about her platonically wtf. she spares a thought for her poor auntie, who would’ve loved to have a sect heir care about her niece in much less platonic ways.

at the end of mianmian’s rant, jin zixuan is blinking quite a lot. “you like women?” he asks. he’s always been a bit slow on the uptake. mianmian nods. “you like jiang-guniang?”

mianmian shrugs. “more or less. she’s just really pretty and i’m dying about it. it’s fine.”

lan wangji says, “mn,” sympathetically and jin zixuan continues to gape.

mianmian winces. “you’re not going to be weird about this, are you?”

jin zixuan shakes his head quickly. “no, no-- of course not, i--you know that i--you’re my best friend, i don’t care--what does it matter to me, who you want to--to touch your hair.”

it’s probably the most awkward sentence he’s said to her in years, but possibly more articulate than she’d been expecting. it makes her tear up regardless and she punches him in the shoulder to hide it, and that’s basically how the three of them start hanging out in the library nearly every day after lecture.

sometimes they go to the sparring ground, bc who’s better sparring practice than the second jade of lan? and sometimes (once or twice) mianmian manages to convince lan wangji to join her and jin zixuan for lunch in caiyi town when they don’t have lecture, but mostly they meet in a secluded part of the library where mianmian can rant about how pretty all the women at lectures are, jin zixuan can turn pink whenever she mentions jiang-guniang, and lan wangji can “mn” and nod sympathetically at all the right parts

and mianmian thinks that’s going to be the end of it, they’re just going to be friends now and everything else will move on as usual, bc by some ridiculous trick of fate lan wangji and jin zixuan seem to like each other. which makes sense in hindsight bc they’re both awkward sect heirs who care about cultivation and people a lot even if they’re not great at showing it

(and he’d never say it but mianmian thinks jin zixuan’s easy acceptance of her liking women is probably the first time lan wangji’s ever seen someone accept that kind of thing before (maybe, possibly, other than his brother, lan xichen seems really cool, even if he does smile kind of intensely at mianmian whenever he happens upon her hanging out with his little brother.))

so they’re friends, they’re unexpected friends, and sometimes lan wangji even makes jokes in that dry deadpan way of his and sometimes jin zixuan doesn’t completely trip over his own words and manages to act like a normal human being and mianmian gets two idiots to care about and a perfect place to vent her womanly frustrations, and she thinks that’s the end of it and then wei wuxian accosts her after lectures one day

“do you like lan zhan?” he asks accusingly, eyes narrowed to slits. “what am i even asking, of course you like lan zhan, but do you like-like him?”

mianmian thinks sadly to herself that she’s much too into women to be dealing with all these men’s emotional problems. “lan wangji is my friend,” she says, carefully sidestepping wei wuxian, who continues to squint at her suspiciously. really, he’d been amusing when he flirted with her, but this? this is just ridiculous.

“does he know that?” wei wuxian asks. “because if he doesn’t, that’s just leading him on, and it’s really not nice to--”

“lan wangji knows we’re friends,” she says, trying to enunciate to get her point across clearly. “you can ask him, if you don’t believe me.”

wei wuxian squints a moment longer before he turns and flounces off. mianmian thinks this is the end of it until she’s accosted again after dinner with, “he said you were friends!”

for some reason, wei wuxian seems even more troubled by this than earlier. mianmian tries to suppress her eyeroll. “i told you he would?”

“but how,” wei wuxian says, suddenly whining. “i’ve been trying to be his friend for months and he refuses to acknowledge me.”

oh, mianmian realizes with a quickly dawning horror. she and lan wangji are not the only cut-sleeves at cloud recesses this summer. (she has suspicions, of course, but no confirmations on any of the others, but this. wow.)

she also realizes, decides really, that she has enough repressed sect heirs in her life and she cannot deal with wei wuxian’s cut-sleeve crisis or his evidently large attachment to lan wangji right now. she turns decisively and walks the fuck away. not her problem.

the lectures end eventually, of course, and mianmian and jin zixuan return to lanling with a horde of golden robed disciples, freshly deflowered and not all together more learned. it’s what, she thinks grimly, their sect leader would want.

the first few weeks go by and she realizes that she’s missed unloading about her frequent and fast falling-in-loves. jin zixuan just doesn’t sympathize right, bless him, and so mianmian takes to writing letters. she sends two without receiving a reply and just starts to write the third when a letter with the gusu symbol is delivered to her room.

she’s almost expecting to find a single mn written on the page-- she would’ve been delighted with just that, actually, the sheer hilarity of such a thing-- but instead she finds several pages filled with lan wangji’s perfect calligraphy.

it’s more than he’s ever spoken out loud, but it seems that propriety dictated that he return mianmian’s extensive letter with one of his own and he’s done so admirably. he responds to the events mianmian detailed in her letters-- most succinctly summarized as, woman are gorgeous and i’m dying-- and then writes about his own life in cloud recesses. apparently, he went on a little night hunt with wei wuxian and also nie huaisang and jiang cheng were involved? seriously, mianmian misses out on all the fun.

he’s also apparently taken in some rabbits, which mianmian immediately decides she needs to see. lan wangji, sitting prim and proper, with a bunch of rabbits in his lap? amazing. wei wuxian would die on sight, she’s sure of it.

he also ends his letter with a warning about qishan wen that has mianmian frowning. she takes it to jin zixuan who reads the paragraph and frowns. “i’ll talk to my father about it,” he says, which she can tell by his hunched shoulders he doesn’t expect to do much.

“talk to your father’s general too,” she suggests, because that man at least thinks with his head and not his dick.

jin zixuan nods but doesn’t hand back the letter. he skims it instead with a barely concealed surprise at lan wangji’s previously hidden expansive vocabulary. mianmian snorts and grabs the letter back. “you can write to him yourself, you know.”

jin zixuan flushes down his neck. “i know!” he insists and then turns and runs away because he’s a coward. mianmian shakes her head, smiling. what an idiot.

still, another week goes by and a letter arrives from gusu and, when mianmian takes it, assuming it’s for her, she finds it addressed to jin zixuan in lan wangji’s impeccable calligraphy and she grins to herself like an idiot. look at jin zixuan, making friends

(she suddenly understands why lan xichen gave her all those intense smiles during the lan lectures)

they go on in this way, writing letters to lan wangji from lanling. sometimes mianmian steals jin zixuan’s letters before he sends them so she can squeeze in some ranting in the post script without wasting a whole second thing of paper, and lan wangji replies dutifully, more verbose than he ever was in person, and it’s nice okay, like. she and jin zixuan have been best friends since they were kids but neither of them has ever been any good at listening and lan wangji is just so honest and earnest in everything, like they didn’t realize that people outside of lanling were actually not always plotting your downfall??? who woulda thunk

and then of course the wens go and ruin everything. they go to the wen lectures bc jin guangshan doesn’t want to “anger our trading partner” like the guy isn’t obviously going to burn carp tower to the ground the first chance he gets, and mostly mianmian and jin zixuan are just vaguely annoyed and put out about it

then lan wangji shows up with a broken leg and a burned sect and they are ready to murder some dudes

after years of breaking in and out of carp tower she and jin zixuan are old hats at this breaking and entering stuff and they manage to sneak into lan wangji’s guest quarters and tend to his wounds, ignoring all his silent glares and ranting furiously about how they’re going to murder wen chao by making him choke on his own dick (mianmian) and how they’re going to war with the wen sect even if he has to threaten his father with acknowledging all of his bastards as proper siblings in public to do it (jin zixuan)

lan wangji just says “mn” and makes various muted, distressed expressions, but mianmian thinks he’s touched.

“are your brother and uncle alright?” she asks, when she’s set his broken leg and forced pain medication down his throat.

“brother escaped with our sacred texts,” lan wangji says. “uncle is... unwell.”

mianmian knows lan wangji hates touch but the way he says it, with this horrible little frown, emoting more than she’s ever seen him, his barely suppressed anger and grief literally making his hands shake into fists, mianmian can’t help it, she hugs him. “we’ll make them pay,” she swears into his shoulder, ruining the lines of his robes with how she clutches at them. “i promise you.”

jin zixuan awkwardly pats lan wangji’s shoulder, which is a lot for him and mianmian spares a moment to be proud of his growth.

unfortunately, wen chao seems to delight in torturing lan wangji on his injured leg and lan wangji refuses to show weakness, which both impresses mianmian and pisses her the fuck off. she approaches wen qing (and her still gorgeous ears, sigh) and asks her to tend to lan wangji, since she’s like actually a doctor. wen qing does bc she’s beautiful, intelligent, and kind and mianmian spends most of that night sighing deeply as she relates this to a significantly drugged lan wangji

the cave of the xuanwu goes about the same as you’d expect. wei wuxian saving her from getting her face branded off is pretty rad of him, though he could’ve just like knocked the brand away instead of throwing himself in front of it but whatever, you do you boo. when lan wangji gets left behind the two of them don’t even have to wait for jiang cheng to grumble and ask for their help, they’re already on their way to carp tower for an army, thank you very much

when they rescue wei wuxian and lan wangji and lan wangji immediately turns to walk back to cloud recesses on a broken leg mianmian says, “fuck no, that’s not happening, you’re getting medical attention and then someone will fly you back home, okay, wtf wangji, sit down.”

and lan wangji is a stubborn bitch so obvs he’s like no but he’s also severely starved, dehydrated, and injured, so it’s not like he can just shake off mianmian holding him down and this goes on long enough for wei wuxian to wake up and see mianmian touching lan wangji, and something in his poor little brain just like breaks and he demands says, “lan zhan, come back to lotus pier with us.”

his argument, as he explains it, is that lotus pier is closer (it’s not; they’re just as close to carp tower as lotus pier) and that it’s closer to gusu for when lan wangji has to return home (it’s not; same deal) but then jiang cheng starts yelling, possibly in support possibly not mianmian’s not sure, and jin zixuan starts getting awkward, probably about the whole golden army behind him bc he’s a nerd and hates being overdressed at functions (this is basically the same thing), and mianmian looks at lan wangji and she sees--

something. she isn’t sure what exactly, but lan wangji looks at wei wuxian as he argues with his brother and he presses his lips into a thin line in the way that means he wants to smile and mianmian thinks, oh. maybe wei wuxian isn’t completely unrequited in his lan wangji obsession.

growing up in lanling, she knows how to use information to her advantage, so she immediately says, “young masters wei and jiang, what a great idea. lanling’s disciples would be pleased to accompany you and second young master lan to lotus pier to ensure everyone’s safe arrival.”

everyone splutters, indignant, confused, awkward (jiang cheng, wei wuxian, and jin zixuan, respectively) but lan wangji narrows his eyes at mianmian and doesn’t try to convince her to let him walk to gusu again, so she counts it as a win.

sect leader jiang and his wife seem surprised and annoyed, respectively, to be taking in so many guests, but sect leader jiang merely smiles pleasantly and directs them to some guest quarters and mianmian and wei wuxian ask, simultaneously, for doctors to tend to lan wangji and wei wuxian makes a face at her and mianmian sighs to herself that she really is too gay to be in the middle of his thing with lan wangji.

turns out, walking a lot and fighting a cannibalistic turtle on a broken leg doesn’t do wonders for healing. lan wangji is also the worst patient ever, he keeps trying to sneak out and get up even though word came from his brother that he’s safe and alright and that cloud recesses is starting to rebuild after qinghe nie and lanling jin came to its aid and pushed out the wen

but with the combined efforts of mianmian, jin zixuan, and wei wuxian (and even jiang yanli at one point, bc who could say no to her soup??) they manage to get lan wangji to just rest for a fucking second, really which results in the jin disciples and lan wangji staying in lotus pier for longer than anyone could’ve expected

mianmian spends most of her time (when she isn’t forcing lan wangji to just fucking stay in bed) working with the jiang disciples, practicing archery, sword forms, and mooning after all the beautiful women here.

(”lan wangji, i know she’s scary, but have you seen madam yu? she could whip me with zidian and i’d thank her” “luo-guniang, please don’t ask madam yu to whip you” OR “lan wangji, i’m almost positive madam yu’s maids are a thing, do you think they’d let me join them just like once” “luo-guniang, could you please pass me my sword?” “why” “i’d like to put myself out of this misery” OR “she made me soup. lan wangji. lan wangji, i know you’re not sleeping, wake up, you have to listen to me, this soup”)

they end up staying so long that when wang lingjiao shows up threatening a child about a kite while sect leader jiang is away, she has a lot more to deal with than madam yu. since none of this had been a “sanctioned visit” no one actually knew that there was nearly an entire troop of jin disciples staying at lotus pier, so when the wens attack they are sorely unprepared for what they’re going to face.

(and ofc lan wangji breaks out of bed heroically and keeps madam yu from whipping wei wuxian, which means they aren’t down one of their most powerful fighters and mianmian has to suffer through the moon eyes they’re making at one another in the middle of a battle no less, she knew wei wuxian had no shame but she’d been hoping lan wangji would have some)

after the wen attack (and defeat) on lotus pier and the jin’s inarguable part in it, the war starts in earnest. lan wangji, after his long rest, heals fine and goes back to gusu to help rebuild his sect and plan for war, and mianmian and jin zixuan return to carp tower to plan as well, ignoring jin guangshan and focusing instead on his general to ensure lanling supplies necessary aid in the war effort

and war is always shitty, of course, and mianmian hates watching her sect family die on the battlefield, hates waiting for updates after every battle to see who’s still alive, hates the politics and jin guangshan trying to wheedle his way out of fighting when there’s fucking lives on the line

(and she could never know, how much easier it is, with yunmeng jiang at its full strength, with one of the brightest minds of their generation there to plot and help, with two of the best fighters not out searching for someone and instead focused on the front)

they reach nightless city after months of fighting and mianmian is ready to just fucking stab wen ruohan herself when they’re suddenly trapped. blocked in on all sides by puppets, their fallen soldiers rising again to turn on them, and it--it looks like they’re gonna die.

“this sucks,” she says to lan wangji, stifling her fear and choking it down. “i never even got to kiss a girl.”

lan wangji just says “mn.”

jin zixuan, beside them, says, “i was an idiot about jiang-guniang.”

lan wangji just says, “mn.”

then wei wuxian pulls out a fucking flute and a-- floating piece of metal? the army of puppets and corpses stops advancing, held in place by-- music, apparently? and wen ruohan emerges from his lair, black energy falling off him in waves, wei wuxian the idiot flies forward to meet him, gets wen ruohan’s hand around his throat for his trouble.

lan wangji yells, “wei ying!” and mianmian thinks, really not fair that lan wangji is gonna get a boyfriend before i get a girlfriend

and then wen ruohan gets stabbed by jin zixuan’s half brother of all people. wen ruohan, along with his puppets and wei wuxian, fall to the ground. lan wangji rushes forward to catch wei wuxian, mianmian runs after him, finds herself in company with jin zixuan and jiang cheng. when they get there, wei wuxian is barely conscious but he’s-- he’s fucking grinning up at lan wangji from the cradle of lan wangji’s arms

“lan zhan,” he says, “you caught me.”

lan wangji nods, says, “mn,” which is basically his equivalent of i’ll always catch you, wei ying.

“really,” mianmian says aloud, “it’s so unfair.”

the aftermath of the war is more annoying than the war itself, what with all the politics and in-fighting and jin guangshan trying to be the biggest dick there ever was. jin guangshan tries to name himself chief cultivator in wen ruohan’s stead but nie mingjue suggests jiang fengmian instead and the lan sect backs him. jin guangshan tries to demonize the wens but at wei wuxian’s loud rebuttal and sect leader jiang’s backing (which is then backed by both gusu lan and qinghe nie) he’s once again shouted down. and then jin guangshan tries to propose to jiang-guniang for his son and the poor woman just seems so awkward and her father doesn’t seem to know what to say and--

mianmian elbows jin zixuan whose eyes widen ridiculously but, after another, harder hit, he suddenly stands. all eyes go to him, which mianmian knows he hates, but he bows to his father, then jiang yanli, and says, “jiang-guniang, forgive my father’s impertinence. this is not the time or place to be making such an offer, but he--” jin zixuan winces visibly. “--he knows of my feelings and wishes to make his foolish son happy. please, do not feel the need to respond.”

then he promptly sits down, flushing down to his neck, and mianmian shares a disbelieving glance with lan wangji from across the horrible nightless city palace room.

she’d really only meant for him to suggest jiang yanli answer privately, at a later time, but wow, jin zixuan really went for it. also no way jin guangshan knows his son has fallen in love with jiang yanli, so nice save face there. maybe he has been paying attention in all of their etiquette and political espionage classes.

jiang yanli flushes way prettier than jin zixuan and nods politely, stands and bows and thanks the jin clan for being considerate in this time of turmoil, perhaps they can discuss this matter at a later date (jin zixuan looks like he nearly faints at this, and mianmian feels vindicated in all her forlorn ranting. overreacting her ass)

when everything has been settled, wen qing has been appointed the new sect leader of qishan wen with promises to return land to those who lost it and pay reparations to the hurt civilians, as well as have the yin iron destroyed for good. during the final ceremony where all the sects have tea and pledge to be loyal to one another (until the next great war, of course) mianmian leans close to lan wangji and sighs, “her ears look even lovelier with her hair tied back by her new sect leader hairpiece.”

lan wangji says “mn” because he’s a cut sleeve in love with wei wuxian and has nothing even closely resembling taste.

mianmian, on her own, decides to make them both happy. before the jin clan departs from nightless city, she goes up to wei wuxian and asks for a moment of his time. wei wuxian seems confused but follows and, once they’re alone, he says, “mianmian, are you about to get me into bed, because i must tell you that i am a respectable young cultivator and you’ll need to marry me before--”

mianmian gives him her best unimpressed look (she’s had much practice with it, thank you jin zixuan) and cuts him off with, “i like women.”

wei wuxian’s eyes go wide. “but you and lan zhan--”

she cuts him off again before he can say something so stupid she has to stop talking to him to refrain from breaking all laws of propriety. “look,” she says, “you’re friends with wen qing. now that she’s sect leader, your brother can’t go after her. i, on the other hand, very much can. if you promise to figure out a way for me and her to get close, i’ll tell you a secret you’ll like very much.”

wei wuxian seems hesitant for all of half a second before he breaks. “tell me.”

“do you promise?”

wei wuxian raises three fingers. “promise.”

“on your sister’s life?”

begrudgingly, wei wuxian nods.

“on her soup?”

“just get on with it!”

mianmian smirks, pushes onto her tiptoes, and whispers the secret into wei wuxian’s ear. with that, she returns to the pavilion where all the sects mingle as they wait to depart, wei wuxian trailing behind her in a daze, his mouth hanging open.

lan wangji, who had been watching since mianmian asked wei wuxian for a moment to talk, frowns nearly imperceptibly. mianmian grins at him and his frown grows.

ah, whatever. she walks over to him, unbothered by the quickly growing alarm in his eyes. once next to him, she turns around to see wei wuxian staring unabashedly. her smile only widens.

“you’re going to thank me for this,” she says.

wei wuxian shakes himself, his eyes focusing, and immediately starts walking towards them.

lan wangji, voice flat but wavering, asks, “luo-guniang, what did you do?”

mianmian laughs, says, “i get to give a speech at your wedding,” and walks away just as wei wuxian reaches them.

(she does, actually, give a speech at their wedding. she may or may not be drunk during it, jin zixuan gets embarrassed for her, and she starts tearing up and has to hide it in the shoulder of her wife’s lovely well-tailored robes. it’s alright, though, wen qing doesn’t mind)

EDIT: now on AO3 with a real fic version from lwj’s pov!

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lilolpotato · 3 years

Text

Chemicals

In which Miya Atsumu slowly poisons his girlfriend’s mind, and Suna Rintaro gives her the antidote

Warnings: Toxic behavior, body shaming, like 2 swear words

Genre: ANGST

At first it was small. That’s how it always starts, really.

You both had started dating recently, and you were in the honeymoon phase.

He would constantly make you blush, never failing to compliment you.

“Princess! If you were an angle you would be an aCUTE angle” he would wink, before hugging you and telling you how beautiful you looked that day.

Maybe it was wishful thinking or naivety, but those days you thought you both would never break up.

You spent summer nights in his muscular arms, dreaming about how handsome he would look in a suit, about the words he would say as you’re getting married, about how his face would look when he sees you in your wedding dress.

You got late on your way to the gym, he was going to walk you home like always.

You decided to just buy him a snack instead of making one like you would usually

His eyebrows creased in disappointment when you handed him the snack you bought

“You seriously bought it?”

Atsumu was too consumed in taking out his frustrations to notice your eyes growing sad

But he played it off like a joke later, and apologized.

He made excuses that he was tired from practice, or that he was frustrated with his last test grade

“Sorry princess, I swear I didn’t mean it. You know I’m grateful for how supportive you are!” He whined, “I love you, I wouldn’t change you.”

With a kiss on the lips, the incident was forgotten.

The next time he got angry was when you were late to a date

Your were stuck at the store, getting yourself some band-aids because you fell and it was bleeding, but the line was very long

It wasn’t an anniversary or an important or particularly expensive place, but it still made him angry.

You walked in half an hour late, bruises and scrapes all over your arms and legs looking like you’d just gone through hell, with a smile

You expected your Tsumu to fuss over you, give you kisses, and tell you everything was gonna be okay.

“Is this you trying to get me back for getting mad at you when you bought me that shitty snack instead of making me something? You know, all of my past girlfriends would make me delicious bentos and take care of me the right way.”

Your face dropped.

He dragged his hands through his golden hair, and the eyes that you fell in love with became eyes you were intimidated by

That day you cleaned your wounds on your own, trying to tell yourself that he shouldn’t have been that angry

But when you looked inside your heart, all you found was love and guilt.

The next day at his practice, you brought a bento you had spent hours working on, bandaids everywhere and your Tsumu apologized and moved on.

“Sorry babe, I was frustrated with practice. Love ya, bye.” He said nonchalantly.

A peck on the lips and the incident was forgotten.

You sat at the bench cheerfully, watching the team, happy that your problems were ‘solved’

Fox-like eyes noticed all your scrapes and bruises, and he sat next to you during breaks in practice, the same breaks Atsumu used to talk to his teammates and fan girls, and he asked you if you were okay.

While your Tsumu should have been consoling you, Suna was fussing over you, telling you everything was going to be okay, as your fake cheerful attitude dropped. His fists clenched as you tearfully admitted how Atsumu felt about your shortcomings as an s/o

That day, and the days after that, Suna Rintaro acted more like a boyfriend than your Tsumu did, despite your Rin only being your best friend.

Atsumu would say, “Babe, are you wearing make up? You know I like your natural look.”

And your Rin would assure you, “You look stunning no matter what you put on your face” with a tiny grin and adoring eyes.

“Hey, princess? Can you put on some make up? Your skin is looking irritated today.” Atsumu would advise.

Your Rin would disagree, shaking his head, “Even if your skin ‘looks irritated’ or whatever, who said that’s a bad thing? You should put whatever you want on your face, sweetheart, don’t listen to him.” And you would tease your Rin for being cheesy.

Atsumu would look at you in surprise,“You can’t fit into the dress I bought you? Maybe you should lose some weight, my ex was a size zero, but don’t worry, I won’t expect you to get there in a day!”

Your Rin would tell you, “I think you look beautiful, size 0 or size 100! Is there a size 100?” You would laugh together as he grumbled that talking to you was making him lose brain cells.

His foxlike eyes watched you, as he admitted to himself that he would make himself look stupid however many times if it made you laugh like that.

Atsumu would critique, “You should eat more. You’re looking pale these days, it’s kind of bothering me.”

And your Rin snapped at him that day, saying “I think your girlfriend can very much choose what she wants to put in her body.”

Atsumu only shrugged and continued munching on the bento you had painstakingly made for him

Your Rin looked at his bento in envy

Osamu would only give you a small apology whenever he heard Atsumu say something mean to you.

He didn’t know you very well, but he did know that you didn’t deserve to be treated like that. However, he wasn’t aware of how often Atsumu would insult you.

As the days went by, you noticed a difference between your Tsumu and Atsumu.

Atsumu hurt you. Atsumu scolded you for your mistakes. Atsumu made you question whether you were good enough to be his girlfriend.

Your Tsumu would never make you feel that way. To your Tsumu, you were a treasure, and he was grateful to keep you.

You and your Rin were walking on the grounds, because Atsumu was mad at you again.

“You’re talking to Suna too often!” He had huffed angrily, “Don’t be such a slut! He’s my best friend, don’t lead him on like that. Are you cheating on me?”

You convinced yourself that things will get better, that it was only Atsumu’s insecurities making him angry and hurtful so often.

The final dose of poison was when he fed some of the bento you had made to one of his fangirls.

They had asked for a taste, eyes sparkling, taking about how Atsumu and Osamu always had the best bentos.

So Atsumu took the chopsticks he was using, the same ones that his lips were on, and used it to feed that girl.

He was unaware that you were tearfully watching, your Rin at your side, your heart officially broken.

You walked up to him, asking him how could you do that, how could you hurt me like this?

But he scowled angrily, and those eyes, the same eyes you were once in love with, the eyes you were scared of, glared at you with so much hatred your knees almost went weak.

And after he said, “So now ya understand how it feels?” in such a petty way, the tears you’ve been holding back for so long finally came bursting forth, and so you told him, “I’m done.”

His eyes widened in realization, and before he could say anything, you finally stood up for yourself.

Because then, you told him what he’d been doing to you as the fangirl and your Rin, your currently seething Rin, watched.

“You’re poison, Miya Atsumu. You tell me to lose weight, so I starve myself. You tell me I’m a slut, that I’m not good enough. You’ve told me that I’m not pretty enough without make up, that I shouldn’t wear make up. I foolishly followed because I loved you!” You stomped your foot in frustration of your past actions.

And you walked away.

You walked to your Rin, the one who treated you how you deserve to be treated.

Because you deserve better.

Atsumu only watched helplessly as your Rin put his muscular arm around you, as you leaned on his chest, as you walked away.

Miya Atsumu isn’t the one who gets dumped, he’s the one doing the dumping.

He tried to convince himself, delude himself that it wasn’t his fault but he knew it was.

Tears fell from his once scary eyes, years later, as he looked at the wedding invitation.

You’re invited to the wedding of L/n Y/n and Suna Rintaro

He never deserved you, he poisoned you, and now that the poison doesn’t have anywhere to go, it ended up consuming him.

Miya Atsumu, professional volleyball player and playboy, sat in the corner of his apartment with sobs racking his body as he cried over his mistakes and everything he’s lost.

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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 3 years

Note

What would happen if you were sent back and ended up in the orphanage with Tom Riddle—and say you also had magic?

Oh boy.

Well, there's a lot to question here. Judging by the... spirit of this ask, I presume I'm... pretty much reincarnated. I'm in the orphanage, I'm much younger than I am now and a child, I'm pre-Hogwarts age, and I retain my current knowledge.

For the purpose of this ask I suppose I also retain my current mental faculties. Despite being in the body of an eight-year-old, I'm not The Carnivorous Muffin at eight.

Welp, there's a lot to consider here.

First, I probably don't realize I'm in Harry Potter for quite some time and instead assume I've been reincarnated to some parallel universe. It's the 1930's, I'm in England in the depression, WWI has occurred and the vast majority of major historical events I know about seem to have happened in the right order, and this Earth is eerily similar to the Earth I left behind.

Strange that I appear to remember everything of my past life with my adult mental abilities, but alright universe, I guess that's how we're going to play this.

What I do know is that I'm dirt poor, presumably still a woman which does not bode well for my career prospects, and if I want any prospects in life period I'm going to have to fight tooth and nail for it. It'd be great if I got adopted to help with this, and might be nice to have people in my life who love me, but there's a lot of orphans in the world and a lot of orphans who are much less weird than I am.

The orphanage is the orphanage and not great, Mrs. Cole is overworked, the orphanage is chronically understaffed, and the kids are running wild beating the shit out of each other.

Being a girl, I probably don't have to worry about getting the shit kicked out of me quite as much, but I still probably try to keep my head down and don't aggravate the particularly beefy looking orphans.

Yes, there's some very angry gremlin named Tom Riddle around who will shove you down the stairs in retribution, but that's just a weird coincidence. And then supernatural shit starts happening. Billy's rabbit hangs itself, people get injuries when Tom is nowhere near them, and I start wondering if this is really the Tom Riddle.

I'm in Wool's Orphanage, my matron is Mrs. Cole, Tom Riddle is running around lighting things on fire. It's possible, though it could all be a strange coincidence.

Now, how things go from here depends on how controlled my own magic is. Since accidental magic typically does manifest at least once or twice, it probably does manifest for me for.. something. If Tom Riddle's there to witness it then...

Well, I imagine he's very offended. Here he was, special, different, better than everyone else, and then some girl in the orphanage (who dares to get very good grades on her assignments in school) has it too.

And I just stand there, smiling, going "Tee hee".

He probably confronts me to prove that he's better at it than I am, and he probably is unless the universe hates both him and me, but having someone else with the Shining around probably prompts him to take me as his protégé (in part so he can show off and in part because he's genuinely excited to be able to share this super cool talent).

I am now apprentice to eight-year-old Tom Riddle. Whoop de doo.

Well, I don't remember this part of Harry Potter, so now I'm probably confused as to where I am again. Regardless, I try to advise Tom on how to tone it down and not, say, traumatize Amy and Dennis for life and antagonize all the other orphans forever. He probably doesn't take me seriously. What do I know, I can't even light that patch of grass on fire?

Hanging around Tom Riddle gets me a reputation to, given the difference in genders, probably a fairly nasty one at that. When Dumbledore arrives he's undoubtedly told hot gossip about how eleven-year-old Tom and I have had sex in a ritual to summon Satan. Dumbledore takes this seriously.

Dumbledore probably meets us both at the same time and it's a disaster. I tried my best to prep Tom without revealing I'm a prophet, Tom first doesn't believe there might not be others, then doesn't believe they would be antagonist/anything but amazed by how awesome he is.

Well, Dumbledore lights his wardrobe on fire while I sit there. Dying inside. Dumbledore probably also does something to me too, to teach me some kind of lesson about something.

I imagine he temporarily disfigures me/makes me appear very ugly, then sticks a mirror to the wall, that way I realize that looks aren’t everything/being a whore is wrong. Tom, still traumatized over the wardrobe, is no help and my magic’s probably not controlled enough to do a thing about it.

I spend a day looking like a pig, Tom and I are given just enough money to buy new wands and second hand/barely functioning everything else and given the world’s worst directions to Diagon Alley. Thanks, Albus.

Well, months pass, we get our wands, Tom gets excited for Hogwarts and I... start seriously considering the future. WWII is coming, the Blitz is coming, Tom and I live in east London and must be able to evacuate during the bombing of London (which went on well past the Blitz to the end of the war). I also start considering my future in the wizarding world. Do I now actually have career prospects?

Probably not because I’m muggle born and a woman. My best bet is doing very well in useful subjects and finding employment with the goblins, I can’t imagine they have the same hang ups as the wizarding world.

Tom wants to go to Slytherin, of course, I tell him this is a bad idea. “Gee Tom,” I say, “Not sure how I know this but I have this feeling that Slytherin is filled with people who loathe our very existence and will shank us. Why don’t we pick Ravenclaw or Gryffindor instead?”

No one shanks Tom Riddle! Tom says. Tom is still eleven and while he admits that sometimes I may, in retrospect, have been right about certain things that doesn’t mean he wants to go to the house known for hard work. That’s code word for everyone there being a moron and having no other redeeming features than tenacity. As for the other two, Ravenclaws sound like smug, elitist, nerds and Gryffindors like dumb jocks.

Better to be known for ambition, cunning, and actually being competent.

Well, there’s no talking him out of this one, and goddamn it we’re all each other has.

I’m the closest thing Tom Riddle has ever had to a friend in all these years and in the orphanage the only one who could hold a decent conversation with him. And while it’s not my moral obligation to keep Tom from becoming a domestic terrorist, and there’s no guarantee I even can, dumping him for one of the other houses and drifting apart won’t help.

Not to mention that, after all these years, I’m undoubtedly lonely, I’m in this foreign land, and he’s now the closest thing to a friend I have.

Looks like I’m going to Slytherin, YOOOOOLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOO! I shout as a battle cry as tears run down my face. I may have to convince the hat to put me in Slytherin, but like all human beings I am a mixture of many qualities. I’m not cunning in the least, mind games exhaust me unutterably, but I’m full of ambition.

This confirms every bad opinion Dumbledore had regarding me and Tom.

For the next several months, Tom probably beats the shit out of dormmates who steal his things/harass him. He beats up mine too because feminism (TM) means that he should treat all people equally when guilty of the same crime. I... am not sure I can win that fight so I just resign myself to having to adopt some of Tom’s tactics to make sure I’m not shoved in lockers, have tampons thrown at me, or pig’s blood dumped on me at the prom.

Once again, everyone thinks Tom Riddle and I are dating. I don’t even know if they’re wrong at this point.

Well, being in class with eleven year olds who seem to have had little to no prior education, Tom and I are undoubtedly blazing through class. I imagine I’m bored out of my mind (the Hogwarts curriculum sounds unbelievably boring) and Tom is... well, probably devouring the library but probably also bored. I decide to try and see if I can find some real history texts on this world (there are probably none, the wizarding world seems to only have two historians and both... have a different approach to history than current modern thought as I know it) and discover what magic even is. That shit is fascinating: wingardium leviosa is not.

Dumbledore likely gives neither me nor Tom points in class, I think the house cup is stupid, so I really don’t care. I have no interest in playing quidditch, neither does Tom, so that doesn’t happen.

The second world war starts up, Tom, me, and the muggle borns are the only ones who give a flying fuck. I work harder on figuring out how to get lodging during the Blitz/the bombing of London. Unfortunately, Mrs. Cole hates me too for being the Bride of Satan, so that’s a no go. Third year, 1939, I probably write her in earnest anyway telling her to PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, send Tom and I instructions for the summer/where the orphans are staying/how they’ve been dispersed to the countryside. As a back up plan, I try desperately to shmooze shopkeepers in Hogsmeade during every Hogsmeade weekend to get myself and Tom part time jobs and lodging over the summer. As a back up back up plan, I spend my time badgering Tom to become very good at survivalist wandless magic and if the Lord has pity on me gain some ability in it myself.

Hopefully, either Mrs. Cole or one of the Hogsmeade shop owners take pity on us. If not, then Tom and I are going extreme camping. Given Mrs. Cole (and the brain damage brought on by Dumbledore erasing memories left and right) and the likelihood of Hogsmeade shop owners just not getting it, Tom and I probably go extreme camping.

(Tom, meanwhile, asks Dippet and Dumbledore if we can stay in Hogwarts over the summer. He’s told no exceptions. London’s being bombed, you say? No exceptions. Toodles. Tom is never the same.)

Me, Tom Riddle, a tent we made ourselves, several rabbits we had to catch and skin ourselves, and the pitiful fire that we can keep going through pure will alone because if we try to use real people spells then we’ll get arrested. It has the benefit of making Tom feel very manly and impressive, catching his own food, but both of us are well aware that this sucks.

But hey, we aren’t dead.

Well, I’m sure Tom doesn’t appreciate that and this is where I imagine he seriously starts talking about violent revolution. I imagine much of my time is spent discussing the merits of not violently overthrowing our ant overlords. I imagine a thirteen-year-old Tom isn’t impressed by my pacifism, but he’s not married to Voldemort yet (probably).

Then I imagine the horcrux thing comes up and... Well, I will argue hard against it. Humans die, it is a truth of the universe, and simply something we have to accept. Horcruxes are not a measure against that, they can be destroyed, given infinite time they will be, and the sacrifice they require is too high: human life as well as the very essence of who you are.

What is a soul? I’m not sure, we never really learn in HP canon, but whatever it is, it is in some way the essence of yourself. If you take half of it and throw it somewhere else, you will cease to be you, someone or something else is walking around in your body while the other half of you exists in endless agony.

If you must chase immortality, create a philosopher’s stone (as I darkly wonder why it was that couldn’t be replicated and what Flamel had to do to make it in the first place). On second thought, maybe we should search for the Holy Grail.

Whether I can talk Tom out of this or not is... unclear. I’m going to say that I can, in part because I imagine he’ll want to show the chamber off to me, tell me when he realizes he’s Heir of Slytherin, and in doing so I can prevent the basilisk incident from occurring. Without that, there’s no dead Myrtle, which means no first victim. That summer, when he goes to the Gaunts, I’ll go with him and convince him that it’s not worth it. He can just turn around and leave these people alone, I hopefully can talk him down. Which means no second victim.

I start writing Flamel to see if Tom or I can get an apprenticeship (Dumbledore probably beats us to the chase and poisons him against us, but it’s worth a shot).

Then, should all go well, I can convince Tom to find employment with the goblins rather than shady antique dealers on the bad side of town. Hopefully, I can convince him to never become Voldemort, and instead we travel the world together looking for the origins of magic or something.

Dumbledore goes around taking people’s memories of us in preparation for when Tom becomes a dark lord and I his lady of the night darkness.

TL;DR Apparently my life would become an SI/Tom Riddle fic. So, thanks anon.

#harry potter #harry potter meta #harry potter headcanon #tom riddle #albus dumbledore #anti albus dumbledore #meta #headcanon #opinion

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emerald-chaos · 3 years

Text

Touchdown

*gif not mine, credit goes to the owner*

I just want to take a moment to say thank you for the love on my last fic! It made my lil ole heart swell to see that peopled enjoyed it enough to leave a like or reblog.

This is just something special I had in my arsenal that I wrote for a friend a few months ago. I touched it up a bit and added a few things here and there. It all started when we were talking about how much we loved when Chris' accent got heavier after he'd been drinking, and well, I couldn't help myself lol. I hope you enjoy the fluff! xoxo

I apologize for any grammatical errors, I tried to proof-read but am also a little exhausted lol.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Word Count: 2844

Warnings: I don't think there's anyway? Mentions of being drunk/drinking alcohol, cursing, and illusions to sexy times, but that's about it.

You hadn’t noticed how furiously your knee was bouncing up and down until the person sitting next to you on the subway got up to move seats once the train squealed to a stop. You sighed and ran your hands down the front of your thighs. Normally being a little late didn’t bother you as much, but tonight you were meeting him.

You flipped your wrist over to check your watch. 8:30pm. In all honesty, it had probably been only thirty seconds later than when you checked it the last time. Another deep sigh escaped from your lips as you started to become hyper aware of the train remaining still at the current stop. What could possibly be taking so long? You knew he wouldn’t care if you were running late, but the time the two of you had together already felt so minuscule. You wanted to capitalize on every second you could.

The train began moving again and you slumped back into your seat, feeling only a small amount of relief. It was becoming painfully apparent that you needed to try and relax. You could feel the sweat building up on your body, the sting on your palms from where your fingernails were pressing in with a vengeance moments ago, and you could hear your heart thumping in your ears. Your hand dug around in your purse for a few moments before finding the small case you were looking for. Opening it, you slipped your headphones into your ears and let your head rest on the window behind you as music intertwined with your thoughts.

Once upon a time, you made fun of people who decided to go to grad school. What kind of a clown would spend thousands of MORE dollars and go BACK to school?? Not to mention the stress of the assignments, the due dates - it was not for you...or so you thought.

Now here you are, a regular booboo the fool.

NYU’s graduate program for design and merchandising wasn’t necessarily part of your 5-year plan, but when the opportunity landed in front of you it was difficult to pass up. NYU was a school you had only dreamt of attending back in high school. When you were a senior in high school you were able to tour the campus and fell in love immediately. Hours upon hours were spent researching grants, scholarships, and all sorts of ways to try to make it happen. However, the dream ended as most teenage dreams do - crushed. There was no way you or your parents could afford the loans that it would surely wrack up to attend the out of state university, and there was no way you could ask your parents take on that kind of debt just so you could go to college. UMass was the way to go - close to home and familiar. Not to mention you were able to obtain several scholarships and grants that helped bring down the cost tremendously. Little did you know, boring ole UMass would bring you one of the most important things in your life.

Applying for graduate school wasn’t an easy decision and one you couldn’t really take all the credit for. A smile crept across your face as you reminisced on the night you nervously brought up the idea to your long-term boyfriend.

“I think you should do it,”

“I know, right?” you scoffed, “it’s insane, why would I do something so stup...wait, what? You do?”

“Of course I do. This is something you love and that you’re passionate about. Do you know how many hours of my life were spent listening to you ramble about NYU?” he questioned with a grin.

“It will open up so many doors for you. We can make things work,” a chuckle escaped from those beautiful lips as he saw your dumbfounded expression. He wrapped his fingers around your waist and pulled you close, “What? Did you expect me to forbid it? Cmon, baby, what kind of guy do you take me for?”

You didn’t have a lot of wins in your life, but you did have Chris.

When you got accepted, he took off a week from work to drive you 3 and a half hours south to help get you settled and moved into your temporary new home. The two of you ate a disgusting amount of pizza, moved a ridiculous amount of heavy furniture in the middle of a summer heat wave, and enjoyed each other’s company before the long-distance thing would set in. Chris spent that week encouraging you every step of the way, talking you off the ledge when you were convinced you had made the wrong decision, and made sure to help you christen every possible surface of your new place in the most deliciously sinful way.

You bit your lip slightly at the thought and a warm feeling spread across your face. Chris was one of the most incredible people you had met in this world. Kind, caring, funny, intelligent, passionate, and god was he sexy. The connection the two of you had was scary at first, but now you just couldn’t imagine spending your life with anyone else.

The robotic voice came over the loud-speaker in the subway car and you were rudely ripped back to reality as it pulled into your stop. You hurriedly scooped up your bag and jogged off the train.

It had been a promise between the two of you when you moved that there would be equal effort when it came to visiting and keeping in contact while having good, open communication. Long distance was hard but the two of you were determined to make it work. FaceTime calls, hours upon hours of texting, and even as far as writing the occasional letter back and forth (because your boyfriend was a hopeless romantic and you loved it so much). This weekend was your turn to come home to visit, and of course your last class had to go longer than anticipated. Fuckin’ Tiffany and her stupid ass questions.

The muscles of your calves burned as you kept up your hurried pace, weaving through the crowds of people gathered on sidewalks outside of various clubs and restaurants. It was a weekend night and the Patriots were playing, which meant the city was more alive than usual. New York was it's own beast, but it was a different type of hustle and bustle. Nights like these made your heart ache for home - the thick Massachusetts accents, the rowdy voices of bar patrons arguing about the game, the hugs shared between family members as they parted after dinner, and the faint smell of nicotine and alcohol that hung in the air.

As the neon sign that hung in the pub window came in to view you felt your heart dip down into your stomach. Last weekend’s visit had to be cancelled due to some stuff coming up with Chris’ work and a surprise assignment for you, so you hadn’t seen your boyfriend in 2 weeks. With a deep breath you swung open the door and scanned the crowd for him. He told you that he would be there promptly at 7:15pm for pregame shenanigans with his friends - which actually translated to how many pitchers of beer could they suck down before kick off.

“Aw, come ON! That is such a bullshit call!”

You heard him before you saw him. Of course. A grin spread across your lips as you shook your head. The thought of leaving to avoid secondhand embarrassment crossed your mind briefly before you picked up your feet and made your way through the crowd toward the sound. A room full of people from New England and you would still recognize that voice anywhere.

Everyone else seemed to fade away as you saw the outline of the tall, dark haired man standing at the bar. The slight freckles that spattered the back of his neck, the Brady jersey that he spent WAY too much money customizing, and the signature backward ball cap were ingrained in your subconscious memory. Not to mention if you didn’t recognize his outline or his voice, you would definitely recognize that ass anywhere.

You loved how passionate he got about sports and the way his Boston accent seemed to get thicker with each beer he consumed. Growing up in the area, you wouldn't think the accent would send a tingle down your spine the way it does, but it was different - it was Chris. Not to mention the sparkle in his eye when he would watch his favorite team or the way he would get in to arguments whenever someone tried to say something negative about them. You loved your big, handsome, over-sized toddler man so damn much.

A light tap on his shoulder made him whip around, his slightly opened mouth from his interrupted conversation curved upwards into a wicked grin as he made the connection of who was finally standing in front of him.

“Hey there, handsome. I don’t see a ring on your finger. You single?” You grinned, feeling your entire body fill with warmth as Chris leaned back and grabbed his chest as he erupted in laughter.

“Nah, nah, nah, unfortunately for you I am taken” he responded as he snaked his arms around your waist, sliding his hands into your back pockets as he pulled you into his figure.

“That is too bad,” you tsk'd, running a finger down his toned bicep, “she’s one lucky girl.”

“I think I’m the lucky one,” he grinned. He leaned down to meet your lips in a kiss. You sighed into it, allowing your body to mold itself so perfectly into his. The taste of beer on his lips and the smell of his cologne was intoxicating - it was home. You immediately allowed him entrance as you felt his tongue glide along your bottom lip. Your body felt small in his strong grip and you couldn’t help but laugh a bit as he gave your ass a firm squeeze. Normally, this type of bold, public display of affection would make you cringe away but at this point you were lost in Chris that you had absolutely no shame. Each time the two of you embraced had always felt like the first. Your heart still fluttered and your knees still got weak, like you were a 16 year old being kissed for the first time.

In the middle of your reunion moment, however, something happened in the game that made the entire bar erupt in boo’s and curses. Chris lifted his lips from yours to look over his shoulder and inspect what he had missed. You laughed and shook your head as you pushed him back towards his friends and took a seat in the bar stool he had been standing behind initially. His large hands found a natural place on your shoulders. While his eyes remained glued on the TV he began applying a moderate amount of pressure to your neck and shoulders. You didn’t realize how much your body craved that touch, his touch, until you immediately melted back into him.

The bartender slid a beer in front of you with a wink and you mouthed your thanks. You felt a twinge in your heart as you looked around, taking in the atmosphere of the bar. This was a typical weekend night for the two of you whenever you were living together. Football, drinks, pub food, and friends. If it wasn’t this pub it was your living room, just a couple blocks away. You didn’t even mind that it was your first night back and you weren’t alone, spending it immediately wrapped up in your satin sheets. The atmosphere, the people - it was so warm and familiar that you really wouldn’t rather be doing anything else. Plus, being wrapped up together in the sheets was sure to follow.

“I missed you,” hummed a pair of lips as they placed a kiss on the shell of your ear. A shiver shot down your spine at the sensation of his warm breath fanning over your neck. You reached up a hand and connected it to the nape of his neck.

“I missed you too,” you replied, turning your head to plant a kiss on his stubbled cheek.

His arms changed position as he wrapped them in front of your shoulders and crossed them, resting his chin on the top of your head. Your hand absentmindedly rubbed his forearms as you nursed your beer and placed your focus onto the game for the first time tonight.

The laughter seemed to escape from your chest naturally and effortlessly the entire night, as it always had a habit of doing when Chris was around. The camaraderie between him and his buddies during a game was something you’d grown to enjoy over the years. Chris’ competitive nature and the way his jaw clenched when something wasn’t going the way he wanted was always kinda...hot. All of his friends were huge assholes, but in the best way. It was always entertaining to hear them jab at each other and do what they could to rile someone up. They were the life of every party you had ever attended and they had a way of making a boring night a lot more interesting.

Thankfully (for the integrity of the bar) the Pats won the game with a surprise touchdown in the last 30 seconds of the game. Chris, being the guy he is, bought a final round for his friends and a nearby group they had been going back and forth with all night. You couldn’t help but laugh as he drunkenly leaned across the counter and slurred his order to the bartender.

“I need a round for m’friends and for these assholes over here who thought Tom Brady was anything but a winner!” the group started yelling in protest and he simply waved them off and started sliding beers down the bar.

The group eventually moved to a bigger round top so everyone could shoot the shit and banter about the outcome of the game. You were tucked into Chris’ side, hands intertwined as he was passionately discussing the importance of Brady’s legacy with a stranger who made the mistake of stopping to talk to him. Your eyes followed the motion of your thumb as it traced small circles onto the back of his. Your other hand under your chin, holding up the weight of your head as your exhaustion started to catch up with you. Chris, although slightly drunk, picked up on your body language and raised your hand to his lips for a kiss.

“Alright, fellas,” he said as he stood up from his seat, pulling you up with him, “the lady and I are gonna call it a night. See you boys next weekend”.

“Chris, we don’t have to go,” you began to protest as he tucked his jacket around your shoulders.

“Mm, ‘course we do,” he replied with a soft smile, “you’re so tired, baby. I can see it in those beautiful eyes”.

You could feel your cheeks turn a light shade of pink as you rolled your eyes at his attempt at laying it on thick. After what felt like a proper 10 minute goodbye session, the group said their final goodbyes, hugs included, and you walked out of the pub hand in hand.

The walk home was filled with the sounds of cars passing by and conversation of what each other had missed in the week prior. Small talk typically felt like such a chore, but with Chris every conversation came naturally. Even when he had absolutely no idea what you were talking about, he would listen intently and ask all the questions as if it was the most interesting conversation in the world.

The lock on the apartment door clicked as you pushed it open and entered. You smiled as you stopped into the middle of the living room, taking in the home you missed so dearly. A soft tapping of toenails against the hardwood made your heart soar as you met the eyes of your sweet pup, Dodger. A squeal left your lips as you squatted down to give love to the sweet boy. Chris always made fun of you when you came home, saying that you always seemed to miss Dodger more than you did him and I mean, he wasn’t entirely wrong about that statement.

Once again lost in your own world, you didn’t even notice Chris leaned up against the wall watching you with a smile.

“Oh my god,” you gushed, standing up, “do you like...like me or something?”

Chris grinned as he crossed the room and caught your belt loop with his finger, pulling you into him slowly.

“Yeah,” his voice had dropped down an octave, “you could say that”.

“Mm,” your tongue swiped across your lower lip and you wrapped your arms around his neck, “care to show me how much?”

The look in his eyes made your core burn. The tension building between you two became too much to handle as you crashed your lips into his. The kisses were messy and you could feel the sense of urgency between you two. His beard scratched against the column of your throat with a delicious burn as he left wet kisses across your jaw and down the side of your neck. Chris’ hands found their way back into the ass pockets of your jeans as he started walking you back towards the direction of the bedroom.

Soon, there was a trail of clothes leading to your bedroom and you felt very sorry for your neighbors. It had been a long time, but Chris always had a way of welcoming you home.

#eeeeeeee #i love soft drunk boston frat chris so much it pains me #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #chris evans #chris evans headcanons #chris evans imagines #chris evans fic #chris evans fluff #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #chris evans/reader #chris evans/you #fluff #imagines #headcanons

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mayraki · 3 years

Text

“the adventures of babysitting” - jj maybank

-> hvitstark’s gif!

summary: when the cute boy who mows the lawn for the kook family you babysit shows up, weird and unexpected events start to happen.

masterlist

Babysitting wasn’t something you planned to do when summer started, but when you saw that lonely dollar that you had in your pocket you decided to change that. And what better way, than to take care of the rich kids when their parents are too focused on their golf sessions?

It didn’t took you long to find a parent like that, since in Outer Banks, 90% of the parents had the stupid necessity to go golfing every day, leaving their poor kids on the house. Well, “poor” is a matter of speech, because if you had a pool the side of your entire house and free WiFi to play any game that ever existed, you wouldn’t complain.

“The food is in the refrigerator. Maybe start making it at 12 pm, she likes to eat early.” Mrs. Johnson was saying while she had her big bag on her shoulders, ready to leave the house. “Lily!” She yelled so loudly that you squint your eyes for the sudden scream. “Oh, and before I forget, in a couple of hours the boy that’s going to cut the grass is going to show up. But you don’t have to do anything, he already knows his way around the front yard.” You nodded with a little smile.

“Great!”

“Lily! Get down here, now!” She yelled so firmly that you could tell the fire on her eyes, making you feel a little bit intimidated by the rich house wife. As soon as she went back to you, a smile appeared on her face again changing her expression completely in a matter of one second, making you feel a little bit scared. “Do you have any more questions for the day?”

“No! I’m fine, we’ll be fine.”

“Y/n!” You heard the little girl calling your name while she was running to welcome you with a hug.

“Lily! Come here you little angel!” You picked her up so she could wrap her arms around your shoulders.

“Lily, behave.” Mrs. Johnson said and Lily nodded.

“Yes, mommy, like always.”

“No cookies until lunch is over, got it?”

Lily nodded again, this time more quicker. “Got it.”

Not trusting her daughter, Mrs. Johnson turned to you. “Got it?”

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.” Mrs. Johnson gave Lily a kiss on the forehead before walking towards the door. “See you later Mrs. Johnson!” You waved until you saw her outside and she was no longer in your sight.

“Do you want to see my barbie?” Lily said once her feet touched the ground.

“Sure!”

“Cool! Let me look for it.” She grabbed your hand to walk you to her room. “I did a makeover that took me the whole week. Because when I got her she was so ugly, the change was necessary.” She was saying like a professional fashion icon. Her sass was one of your favorite things about her. “That’s what my mom says all the time. If you don’t like something, you change it so it fits you.” After a walk that seemed to took forever since the house was bigger than the whole frontyard itself, you arrived at her room. While Lily was looking for her barbie to show you, you went over her room like it was the first time your eyes were seeing it. The wall colors looked like an unicorn had throw up in them and then a fairy had her glitter thrown at it. The main color was pink, her bed, her night stand, her desk, even her TV was the color pink. You never hated that color, but her room was making you feel nauseous. It was all so colourful and an interesting thing to look at, but the thing that always caught your attention was the thousand posters of the movie ‘Frozen’. Elsa, Anna and all of those characters you couldn’t remember the names where in her wall smiling. They were so many of them that you started to feel creeped out by them. “Here she is!” Finally, Lily found her barbie as was already walking towards you with her toy in her hand waving it like she was trying to get something out of her. She handed the barbie to you with the biggest and proudest smile ever, but the moment you grabbed the toy the smile disappeared from your face for a second.

“Oh my-” the normal long hair that Barbies have isn’t longer in this one, it was short and it looked like some punk girl from the 80’s with he hairs all lift up. You didn’t even know if it was punk, she looked like she touched a wire with a fork! She had a short dress that looked like it had been on dirt, washed but then she fell on grass, making it look even more dirty and destroyed. Her skin was painted red and blue with some pink dots all over her body. She definitely didn’t had a good day. You looked at Lily and noticed the proud smile and the excitement on her eyes as you were watching the barbie, so you put your biggest fake smile on your face not wanting to break the poor girl’s heart. “She looks wonderful!”

“I know! I’m good at it!”

You quickly nodded. “Yeah!”

“Maybe I can be a fashion designer when I grow up!” Lily started clapping and grabbed the barbie from your hand while you were nodding non stop not knowing what to say.

Models from the future; I’m so sorry and good luck.

You thanked the Gods for Lily not wanting to show you anymore of her creations, instead she wanted to watch a movie, and as soon as she said that, you already knew what she wanted to see.

“Let it gooooo! Let it goooooo!” You heard Elsa sing while Lily’s eyes were glued to the TV, her body was slowly moving while she was whispering the song. You knew she loved the movie so much she never wanted to outsing Elsa, and deep down, you were grateful for that.

“Yes, please Elsa,” you said in a whisper not wanting Lily to hear you while you were sitting down in the couch behind her “let it fucking go. Stop it.” As soon as you tilted your head backwards annoyed, a sound came from the front yard. “What was that? You asked with your eyes glued to the door, but there was no response from Lily, since her little mind was too focused on the movie. You headed to the window to cheek what it was while all the horror movies and serial killers documentaries went through your mind. With your heart beating a little faster you opened the curtains and wondered with your eyes your surroundings, but nothing was there. You were calming down until you heard your phone rang in your pocket, making you jump from the scare.

“What’s up bitch?” Your best friend, Hannah, said on the phone once you picked up.

“Hi, I’m babysitting.” You said still checking the front yard.

“Oh, got it, you have to watch your tongue.”

“Yeah, but I don’t think this kid is listening to me right now, Elsa has that covered.” You did quick look on Lily, who’s eyes were still glued to the TV.

“Ugh, I hate that movie.”

“I don’t. But the amount of times I watched it here isn’t helping on that.”

“What are you doing right now?”

“Checking if the guy- oh my god.” You stopped as soon as your eyes noticed a boy standing in the front yard. Because he was too far away you could only see clearly his blonde hair and his dark brown boots. He had a white shirt on and some light brown shorts, he was far, but the way he was moving and carrying himself was what attracted you and made your eyes stare at him twice, making sure you were seeing correctly.

“What?”

“The guy that cuts the grass for this family is...” you did a quick turn to Lily to check if she was listening, but she was still too focused on the movie. You turned back to see the boy, but before you could continue your sentence, Hannah spoke before you.

“Hot?”

“Oh, more than that.”

“Who is it?” Hannah said intrigued.

“Can’t see, he’s too far.”

“What is he doing?” You saw how his arms tensed when he grabbed some machine you never saw before. They were so strong that you suddenly got the need to walk towards him touch them, but that would be extremely weird.

“I don’t know, turning the machine I guess.” You tried to focus more on his face and try to figure out if you knew him, but he was too far for your poor sight.

“Go talk to him.”

“What? No!”

“Why not? He’s hot, you’re hot. Perfect match.”

“He is definitely a...” Again, you turned around making sure Lily wasn’t hearing. Even if she wasn’t, you choose your next words carefully. “major babe.”

“Major babe?” Hannah let out a tiny laugh. “What are? 30?”

“The kid is still here!” You whispered loudly.

“What is a major babe?” Fuck.

You turned around to see Lily standing there with her Barbie between her hands. The movie was still playing but it looked like your conversation gained her attention even more.

“What? Oh, nothing.” You shook your head with your phone still against your ear. “Don’t worry about it baby. Keep watching Elsa.”

“I want to know what that means.” Lily said with her firm tone, letting you know she wasn’t going to let it go.

“I think you’re in trouble.” Hannah said on the other side, and you knew she was trying to not laugh at your current situation.

“Bye!” You ended the call before leaving your phone in your pocker to kneeled down and be closer to Lily’s face. “A major babe is someone who is... cute.” You said trying to choose the perfect words. Explaining something like this to a six year old isn’t something that you would ever choose to do.

“Cute?” Lily asked confused.

“Yeah, pretty.”

“Like Elsa?”

“Yeah? Yeah!”

You thought the conversation was over when Lily let out a giant smile and nodded convinced. But then, she opened her mouth: “So you think the guy who cuts the grass is pretty?”

“Well-” You got up trying to take those thoughts out of her mind, but before you could say anything Lily started clapping excited.

“You do! Y/n and JJ sitting in a tree-” She started singing but you stopped hearing once you heard the name ‘JJ’.

“Wait, JJ? The guy’s name is JJ?” You said confused, hoping it wasn’t who you thought it was.

“Yeah! He comes every week since last year!”

“JJ? JJ Maybank?” You were praying Lily was going to shake her head and say it was another JJ, but deep down you knew there wasn’t any other guy with that name.

“Yeah!” Lily said happily, unaware of your thoughts and your not so happy face.

Well, fuck.

“Oh my god.” You said when it finally hit you. “Sweetie, I think Anna is dying.” You said gently turning Lily towards the TV.

“Oh no!” She went back to the movie. You turned to the window and moved the curtain while a sigh came out of your mouth.

JJ Maybank. The guy that was known for being the life of the party, getting into trouble or starting a fight. He would almost every time leave the party with some girl around his arm. You weren’t going to lie, you wished sometimes you were that girl. Having a crush on a boy that doesn’t know you exists isn’t... the best. You met JJ at school when you were a kid and that’s when it all started, when he defended you from some Kook kid that was annoying you at lunch. The crush didn’t grew more, the opposite, it went down passing the years. But that didn’t stop you from looking at him when he showed up at the party you were at or feeling nervous when he was around. You weren’t the type to do so, but there was something about him that made you feel as awkward as you could ever be.

The fact that he was in the same house as you made you feel something inside your stomach, making you move uncomfortably in your sit while Lily was watching, for the second time, Frozen. You don’t have to talk to him, there’s nothing to worry about. You were thinking over and over again trying to calm yourself down. Or maybe this is your opportunity to talk to him. You thought in Hannah’s voice, since she knew about your crush she would often say that you should start a conversation with him, or at least introduce yourself.

You didn’t know if he knew who you were. You only talked once, back when you were kids and you thanked him for defending you. That was it. You remembered it, but you were sure he didn’t.

C’mon, what are you waiting for? Go offer him some water! Hannah’s voice was saying in your head like she was next to you giving you the courage you needed to do so. And somehow, it worked. After making sure Lily was safe while watching the movie, you walked towards the kitchen and poured water on a cup to bring outside.

As soon as your hand touched the door to open it, you felt the heat of the sun touching your skin and you heart beating faster, already knowing your next moves.

You saw him getting ready to cut the grass with the same machine you saw before. His skin and hair were glowing under the sun making your heart beat faster than before and him looking more beautiful than he already was.

“Hey!” You said loudly once you were a couple of steps away from him.

JJ immediately turned to you making your heart drop to your stomach. He furrowed his eyebrows confused while trying to figure out who you were. “Hi? Are you the babysitter?” He pointed at you and you nodded with a smile.

“Yeah. Y/n.”

“JJ.” He let out a tiny smile. Fuuuuuuck.

Silence came between you two while your brain was trying to remember what you came outside. “Oh! I bought you some water, it’s pretty hot out here.” You handed him the cup which he took gratefully.

“Thanks.”

“Yeah, I don’t want you passing out. I don’t want to deal with that.” You said and immediately regretted it, why would you say that? That makes you sound like a terrible babysitter!

But as soon as he let out a genuine laugh, your mind gave you a break.

“Sure. So, since when did you started working with this family?” He said before giving a sip to the water.

“Last week.”

“I haven’t seen you around much. You live in the Cut, right?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I do. My dad owns the store across the beach.”

JJ didn’t respond immediately. He stood there watching your eyes carefully, so much, that your heart started beating faster once again. “Really? He has some good boards, dude.”

“Thanks. He’s really proud of them.”

“Make sure to tell him. Thank you for the water.” He gave you the now empty cup and you shook your head with a little smile.

“Don’t worry about it. If you need anything just tell me.”

JJ let out a tiny laugh. “You take care better of me than Mrs. Johnson.”

You smiled back while on the inside you were freaking out. “It’s no-” you were saying but the water hitting your body cut you off.

“What the fuck?” JJ said as soon as both of you noticed the water feeling like rain against your body. You looked up to see if it was, but the sky was as as clear as you last saw it.

“Where is that water coming from?!”

“It’s the automatic water for the grass!” JJ said looking down and pointing at the tiny machine going off behind you. You turned around and looked at it confused, trying to not get hit in the face by putting your hands in front of your face.

“But it never turns on during the day! Do you know how to turn it off?!” You asked at JJ with the hope that he did, and luckily, he nodded turning around and leading to some part of the front yard you’ve never been before. When you arrived to where he was you noticed he was kneeled down and with a quicker twist of his hand, the water was off. “What the hell was that?” You said turning to where the water was coming from.

“I don’t know.” JJ said and looked down to his body all wet. You turned to him and did the same, but not to your own body, to his. The way his shirt was glued to his torso would mark his abs and let you nothing to the imagination. You immediately looked down once you realize you were staring, you felt so embarrassed like you weren’t supposed to see what you just did. “Maybe this will help with the sun and I won’t pass out.” He said with a smile once he looked up at you and you smiled, thankful he didn’t notice you staring at him and his fit body.

“You’re dripping.” You said. “You have to dry yourself otherwise you won’t be able to work with those heavy clothes. C’mon.” You pointed at the house and started walking, but his voice cut you off.

“I’m not sure I’m aloud to go in.”

“Do you want to get your work done or not? Because I don’t think you’ll be able to.” You did a quick look to the drops of water goind down. “It’s your decision, but I think Mrs. Johnson won’t be happy if she comes back and her grass isn’t done. Do whatever you want.” You said knowing that it was going to convince him to go with you. You did this tactic with Lily sometimes, making it their choice and having the control over the situation. Like you suspected, as soon as you made a couple of steps away from JJ, you heard his feet moving and getting closer to yours. Seconds later, he was already next to you.

“Maybe we should go to the bathroom, I don’t want to make a mess.” You said the moment you stepped inside the house. Lily, who was now sitting down on the couch, looked at you two with an exaggerated surprised face and walked to where you two where.

“Oh! What happened?”

“The water of your front yard went kinda crazy.” You said grabbing your sticky shirt and trying to get it away from your skin.

“Really?” Lily asked and then turned to JJ, who nodded.

“Lily I want you to stay here watching the movie, ok? We need to get dry.” You said leading the way to the bathroom. “Don’t open the door to anyone, did you hear me?”

“Yes!” Lily said while quickly nodding and then leaving to continue watching her movie. “Stupid Hans!” She yelled at the TV.

“She really likes that movie doesn’t she?” JJ said with a smile once he turned around to follow you.

“Yeah,” you nodded. “we watched it three times today.”

“Ouch.” You let out a laugh before entering the bathroom and quickly grabbing the towel and turning around to face JJ.

“Here, have the towe-” You were saying but once your eyes noticed JJ’s naked torso, your tongue went completely numb. “Oh.”

“Is everything ok?” He asked noticing your shook face, but then a little grin escaped his lips while he grabbed the towel from your hand.

“Yeah. Yeah! Everything’s fine.” You said quickly shaking your head a little bit, trying so hard to not let your now red cheeks make you feel embarrassed.

“Aren’t you gonna change?”

“I’ll wait for you to be over and then I’ll do it. Don’t worry about it.”

He nodded and the continued drying his body. “I still don’t know what happened with that.”

“Maybe the clock failed?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe. Anyway, thank you.” He handed you the towel. “I have to continue with work.”

“Yeah!” You quickly nodded. “You go.” You watched how he turned around letting you have a perfect veiw of his back, which made you feel like when you saw his torso naked without any warning. You looked away once he left the bathroom and slapped your forehead with the palm of your hand, already overthinking everything you just did.

As soon as you were finished you walked towards the living room to check on Lily who was now finishing the movie just one more time. You grabbed your phone from your pocket to see the time and realized it was lunch time, so trying to focus every thought of Lily, you called her so she would follow you into the kitchen. You grabbed everything that was on the refrigerator like Mrs. Johnson has told you while your mind was making the recipe for Lily’s meal. You were trying so hard to keep your mind focus and not thing of the cute guy that was still working on the front yard, a couple of steps away from you.

“Did you really fell for Hans because I didn’t. It was pretty obvious.” Lily said while watching you prepare her lunch.

“You think? I didn’t see it coming.”

“I didn’t like Hans since the beginning.” Lily nodded proudly of herself.

“You didn’t? I thought he was really cute and charming, maybe that what’s wrong with princes.” As soon as you said that, a thought came into your head. You stayed still like everything in your life just made sense and you understood it in that exact moment. “And maybe that’s why I like the boys I like.” You continued, talking more to your lard than to Lily. “They’re charming and sweet, but then they forget about your face even if you’re wearing a tiny mask, or they kiss you without even consenting it.” You were saying while your head was inside the refrigerator, looking for the mayonnaise to complete Lily’s lunch. “Or they even think because they have money we will automatically fall for them!” The moment that you said that you realized that you were babbling all to yourself about boys while Lily was listening to you, so you turned around shaking all your thoughts away. “Anyway-” you were about to change the subject but when you opened the water from the kitchen sink it all exploded and went all over your face and clothes. “WHAT THE HELL?” You yelled putting your hand in front of your face to prevent the water hitting your eyes.

“I’ll call JJ!” Lily said once she noticed the water wasn’t stopping.

“What- no! I got this!” You tried to stop her but it was too late, she was already out of your sight. “What’s the fucking problem with water today?” You asked trying to turn the water off, but no matter what you did with the switch, it wasn’t stopping.

“What happened?!” You heard JJ asking once he arrived next to you.

“I turned it on and it went crazy!” You turned around to see the water all over the floor. JJ kneeled down and opened the doors down the sink and just like before, stopped the water. You let your hands rest beside your body and let out an annoyed sigh at the feeling of sticky and wet clothes against your skin.

“Just like before?” JJ asked getting up to lock eyes with you.

You nodded. “Yeah. I think the thingy is broken.” You pointed at the sink looking at it confused but when you heard JJ let out a tiny laugh, you turned to him. “What?”

“The thingy?”

“Yeah, where the water comes out.”

JJ nodded still with a funny smile on his face. “Do you know how to fix it?”

“Do you?”

“Dad has tools!” Lily yelled, appearing on the conversation for the first time. You turned to her and she had a big smile on her face while her fingers were playing with each other. “Maybe Y/n can show you where they are?”

“Oh, yeah,” you nodded remembering the time you helped Mr. Johnson fix something for Lily. “I think they’re next to the bathroom. C’mon.” You said looking at JJ but then you turned to Lily. “While we repair that finish your lunch.”

She quickly nodded before you left her behind. “Ok!”

Even if you had JJ behind you, you felt his eyes on you as you were walking. Maybe they weren’t on you, but somehow, your mind had convince you they were making you feel uncomfortable under them. You were hearing his steps behind you, they were so close you could feel the air he was pushing with his arms while walking. The hallway was darker as usual since having JJ in your mind you forgot to turn on the light, but you knew the house like the palm of your hand.

“I think this is the room- yes it is!” You said entering the room next to the bathroom. “Tools tools tools...”

“Here.” JJ said behind you while grabbing a big dark brown box.

“Oh, ok. Better get that thing fixed so you can get back to work.” JJ nodded so you walked to the now closed door. You looked at it confused since you didn’t remember closing it. “What? Did you close the door?”

“No I didn’t.” JJ said.

“Then why the hell is it closed?” You asked before grabbing the handle, but it wasn’t opening. “And locked?!” Your heart dropped to your stomach the moment you realized you were locked and Lily was outside alone. “Oh my god, Lily? Can you open the door please? Lily?!”

Your heart started to beat faster but then, luckily, she spoke from the other side. “Are you guys locked?”

“Yeah! Can you open it from the outside?”

“I don’t know!”

“Can you check sweetie?”

“She’s a six year old? What can she do?” JJ asked behind you not faced by the situation at all.

“Well? Do you have any ideas genius? Lily is out there on her own!”

JJ lifted the box of the tools and let out a grin. “We have tools?”

“You can’t use them! Do you want to break the door?!”

“Do you want to get stuck in here until Mrs. Johnson comes back? Because I don’t think she’ll be happy to know that you left the little girl outside all by herself.” You let out a tiny sigh when JJ used the same tactic you used on him moments ago. You hated when they were used against you.

“Lily, are you still there?” You asked turning to face the door.

“Yeah. Are you two fighting in there?” She asked softly.

“No, sweetie, why would you think that?”

“I don’t know...”

“Do you want me to break the door then?” JJ asked lifting his eyebrow.

“Maybe you can do something without breaking it?”

“I’ll try. But I’m not a magician.” He said getting closer to the door to grab the handle. You noticed he put a lot of strength in it, but you didn’t understand what he was doing. “I think I got it, but I need your help.”

“What do you want me to do?” You walked to stand next to him.

“Grab the handle and pull it really hard when I say so.” You did as he told you and then looked at him, waiting for his words. “Ready?” You nodded. “Go!”

You pulled the handle with all your strength just like JJ told you while JJ was pushing the door to open, and before you could think of something else the door opened. You and JJ had so much strength into it, that the sudden movement of the door opening, made you two lose balance. JJ tried to grab your waist and prevent you from falling, but it didn’t work since your body was already half way to the floor, it only managed to turn you around by twisting you from your waist and not fall on your face. Once your back hit the floor, you felt a body algo hitting yours.

You opened your eyes once the pain in your back passed enough for you to move, to see some blue eyes staring at you. JJ’s face was so close to yours that you were feeling his heavy breathing against your skin. You felt like his eyes were casting a spell on you since you felt like you couldn’t move, and not because you had his body on top of yours. Even if would be normal for you to feel crushed under a body, you weren’t feeling his. You were so lost in his eyes that you forgot everything around you, it was just him and his breathing gently hitting your face.

“Guys-” Lily said softly next to you. That made you return to the moment and realize in the position you two were. He quickly got up and walked back nervously, like he didn’t know what just happened either.

“Lily! Are you alright?” You walked towards her and hugged her body.

“Yeah, I’m good.” She broke the hug to look at JJ, who was still standing in the corner nervously. “You two looked like Anna and Kristoff there.”

“What’s that?” You asked quickly, feeling your cheeks getting hot.

“Yeah, when they looked at each other. With so much looooove.” Lily said and then let out a silly laugh. You wanted the floor to eat you and throw you whatever it wanted, as long as it wasn’t there. Silence surrounded the hallway for a couple of seconds while you were trying to think of something to change the subject and pretend that what just happened, didn’t. But JJ spoke before you.

“Maybe I should get back to work.” He said and you nodded.

“Maybe you should.” The second you said that, he quickly walked passed your body to leave you and Lily behind. You watched his back and noticed he was looking down, maybe you weren’t the only one who got embarrassed. But what did happen?

The moment that you two locked eyes with each other you felt like there was nothing else around you, like you were melting under his eyes. You never felt something like that, and you never wanted to do it again. So lost in your thoughts that you didn’t realize Lily has taken you to the living room to play with some of her new toys. You were hearing her voice talk but non of her words were entering your body. You tried to keep your eyes on the toys but the second that you looked up, your eyes met with his. He quickly looked down and walked away, leaving your sight from the window. You sighed, disappointed.

It wasn’t that you wanted to stare at him... well, maybe it was. But you didn’t want to distract yourself from your work and taking care of Lily, the girl that had to be your number one throught until you left the house. So erasing your unwanted thoughts, you focused your mind into Lily’s game, who seemed to be super invested in.

“Barbie and Ken are going to get married tomorrow, I already planned everything.” Lily was saying the second your mind started to pick up her words. “I’m so excited!”

“I’m pretty sure Barbie and Ken are as well!” You said with a smile, playing along with her.

After a couple of minutes playing with Lily you were glad JJ wasn’t consuming your brain, playing with Lily did helped you get your thoughts straight and focus on what was important. It all seemed to be going back to normal, you weren’t thinking of what happened earlier, Lily and her funny game with her Barbies were definitely making you laugh, and the clock was getting closer to the end of the day, so you were definitely going back to your normal self, until you heard some steps getting inside the house.

“Hey, can I have another glass of water?” JJ asked standing next to the door. You looked up and him and slowly nodded, not opening your mouth. Without giving the opportunity to anything else to happen, you got up from where you were and walked to the kitchen. You heard the door closing and you sighed, glad that JJ didn’t followed you to the kitchen. You didn’t want to talk to him, you knew you were going to be your awkward self and probably embarrass yourself like you usually do, so better to avoid him and forget he even excited... if that’s even possible. You looked at the glass of water that you had now on your hand and stared at it for a couple of seconds. You didn’t want to go out and give it to him, so a better idea came into your head.

“Hey, sweetie,” you called Lily and seconds later she was in front of you with an innocent smile on her face. “can you take this to JJ?” She nodded and grabbed the glass of water before leaving the kitchen behind.

While waiting for her to come back, you closed your eyes when the last time you had JJ in front of you came back to your mind. Well, on top of you is the better choice for words. Your heart dropped to your stomach and the memory slowly came back to your eyes and the feeling of his breathing against your face. Not wanting to have that on your mind, you slapped yourself on the forehead with the palm of your hand. But that didn’t work at all, and what you saw when you opened your eyes didn’t help either.

“Hi.” He said while standing next to the kitchen entrance.

“Hi.” You said, surprised he was inside the house.

“My water?” He asked looking to your hand and noticing they weren’t holding anything.

You furrowed your eyebrows confused, trying to not think you telling Lily about JJ’s water was all your mind playing tricks on you. “I just sent Lily with a glass of water for you.”

“She said that you had it here.”

“What? Lily?” You called her but there was no response. “Lily!” You walked to the living room but she wasn’t there. Feeling your heart beating faster you walked outside hoping she was there. Once your eyes went over the entire front yard while your heart was slowly beating faster passing the seconds, your eyes finally landed on Lily, but that didn’t calmed you down, since she was standing right next to the pool. “What are you doing?”

“I want to take a swim!” She yelled once you started to walk towards her, followed by JJ.

“You don’t know how to swim! Your mom doesn’t let you in if she’s not here! Come back!”

“But I want to swim!”

“Lily you can’t! I’m pretty sure you will when your mom comes home.” You said but Lily didn’t respond you, instead she turned towards the pool. “Lily?” The moment she lifted her foot your heart dropped to your stomach. Your eyes followed her body falling inside the pool once she jumped and threw some water drops into the air, you saw it all like it happened in slow motion. “Lily!” You yelled like you never did before. You started running towards her ready to jump and grab her, but JJ being faster than you, with quick moves took off his boots and jumped into the pool.

Once inside, the water was making it difficult for you to fully see their movements. That was making your hands sweat and your heart to beat faster, it felt like it was going to jump out of your body. But then, you saw JJ’s head above the water, followed by Lily’s.

“WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?” You yelled once JJ left Lily’s body outside the pool. “Oh my god, you almost gave me a heart attack!” You patted her back while she was getting all the water outside from her body. You felt your heart getting heavy and slowing its speed while your breathing was letting out relief breaths.

“I’m sorry.” Lily said, once she stopped cuffing.

“Why- why would you do that Lily? You know you can’t swim!”

Lily looked up and JJ, who was breathing heavily with his body covered in water and his clothes sticking to his skin, but then she went back to looking at the floor. “I wanted- I wanted to be Anna.”

“What?” You asked confused.

“And I wanted JJ to be Kristoff.” As soon as she said those words you locked eyes with JJ, who seemed to understand the same thing as you on the same moment. Lily wanted to have a love like the characters of her favorite movie.

“Oh... Sweetie,” you kneeled down to be closer to her face. “And you thought that jumping into the pool when you can’t swim was going to make JJ your Kristoff because you wanted him to save you?”

She slowly nodded. “Yeah. And I- I also turned on the water earlier.”

“What?” You and JJ asked at the same time.

“The water for the grass- I did it.”

“Why?” JJ asked once you got up.

“And I broke the water tap. And I locked you two in the closet.” You opened your mouth surprised before looking at JJ, who was just as surprised as you.

“How?” He asked.

“Why would you do that?”

Lily shrugged her shoulders and that made JJ let out a tiny laugh while shaking his head.

“At least we know the house isn’t haunted.” He said, turning the conversation into something funny.

“You little devil.” You said, after letting the funny in the situation hit you.

“Are you gonna tell my mom?” Lily asked softly once she locked eyes with you.

“Lily, do you promise you won’t do it again?”

She quickly nodded with a smile. “I do.”

“Then this will be out little secret.”

“Thank you Y/n!” For the first time during those long hours, you felt like there was nothing else that could go wrong. You didn’t felt uncomfortable under JJ’s eyes, Lily was completely fine and JJ didn’t seem to bother that a little girl almost drowned for him... it all felt just alright. “And you calling JJ a major babe will be our little secret too!” Lily yelled and quickly added, noticing your cheeks go red and JJ letting out a grin once he locked eyes with you. “Oh, sorry.” Lily said softly.

“Shit.”

Well... it had to happen, just another thing going completely wrong.

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