Tumgik
#i’d ask for cheering up myself but i don’t wanna be selfish. so there’s no pressure but i would appreciate it though
kaunis-sielu · 10 months
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Sick: End
You stare up at him for a moment before it clicks that he’s up, he seems totally fine.
“St-Steve.” A sob breaks the word and he scoops you up off of the floor.
“Hi Sweetheart.” You pull his mouth to yours with your good arm and kiss him soundly.
“I fuckin’ missed the shit out of you.”
“Let’s get your arm taken care of then we can get back into this so we can make out some more later.” He offers and you laugh, you’re fairly certain it’s the first time you’ve really laughed since Sam got sick.
Steve carries you to the med bay and Helen nearly drops the equipment she’s using.
“Steve. You’re already back to normal?”
“I’m a little sore but other than that? I feel fine. Besides, my woman was getting her arm stomped on and I wasn’t going to let that happen.” Helen seems to realize you’re cradling your arm and she snaps out of her daze.
“Into the cradle.” She says before she announces, “Ladies. Rogers is up and ready to kick some ass.” You hear the cheer through your comm piece.
“Tony?” Pepper asks and you look over Steve’s shoulder at him.
“Not yet, but his vitals look great.” Shit, you suddenly realize that you never pulled the sleep off of Tony.
“Steve, I need to get the sleep off Tony. Now.” He doesn’t look thrilled but Steve changes direction and the second you pull the sleep away Tony’s eyes snap open and he sits up with a gasp.
“Pepper! He’s up!” You tell her and she laughs.
“Tell him I’ll be there as soon as this is over.”
“Tony relax, Pepper will be in soon.” You tell him as Steve brings you to the cradle. It’ll only take minutes for it to work, it’s an incredible piece of medical technology.
Once you’re out of the cradle you and Steve head back into the fight. It doesn’t take long to finish off the few stragglers and the girls come into the room, several give Steve a hug or in Carol’s case they shadow box one another. Pepper rushes to Tony and the two talk softly, he wipes some tears off her face.
“Is everyone okay?” You ask as Nat comes swaggering in and she nods. Everyone is locked up downstairs and no major injuries, I’d call it a success.
“Nox was hurt but we already put her in the cradle.” Helen says as she bustles past with all of the vials of vaccines. “Jemma! I need help administering these. Shuri and Betty can you get started on more?” The other three women jump into action and you follow Helen, pulling the sleep off of your friends, Steve follows closely behind you like a shadow. The second you pull the sleep off of the last man, a lower level agent whose name you don’t know, exhaustion rolls through you and Steve’s arm circles your waist like an iron band.
“You need to sleep Sweetheart.”
“I slept when you were sleeping.” You argue, you don’t want to leave the party.
“Nox, you went through a battle, used your powers there, were put in the cradle then used your powers again. I know it’s important to be around and see everyone but I’m worried about you.” When you just sigh softly he continues, “wanna just be selfish and have you all to myself Honey.” That’s what gets you. Steve rarely asks for anything, he’s rarely selfish and for him to admit that and ask for you alone is enough.
“Okay.” Steve weaves his fingers through yours then leads you out of the common room and to the elevator. Neither of you say anything until you get back to your room.
“Do you wanna shower?” You ask as the door swings shut behind you, Steve nods, tired eyes meeting yours.
“Join me?”
“Of course. I want you to sit down. We still don’t know all the shit this put you through.”
“Me?” He looks surprised, “you had to figure it all out, you had to save me.”
“I didn’t do anything you wouldn’t.” You tell him, as he follows you into the bathroom. You turn on the shower then start to peel off you clothes when you look over your shoulder at him Steve hasn’t moved. “Steve? You okay?”
“Yea, just thinking.” He says giving you a little half smile before stripping off his clothing and joining you in the shower. You spend most of the time under the hot spray just wrapped in his arms. You hadn’t been able to admit to yourself that this moment almost hadn’t been a possibility. It was a miracle that everything went well, not that it was easy but you had him back. Once you finish your shower you change into pajamas, boxers for him, underwear and one of his shirts for you.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” You ask him softly and Steve gives you a little half smile.
“Somehow I’m just fuckin’ exhausted.”
“I mean, they did put your body through a lot.” You tell him sliding onto your bed, “I missed the hell out of you.”
“I’m sorry that you had to go through that Sweetheart. I could hear you though, the whole time. It was like, I couldn’t just pull out of the fog enough to talk to you.” It sounds like hell,
“That sounds horrible.”
“I mean it wasn’t fun but at least I knew you were alive.” Your heart breaks for him, you know that he’s got lots of regrets from before you, things that he’s told you and some that he hasn’t, and you know that protecting you is high on his list of priorities.
“I love you.” You tell him carding your fingers through his hair,
“Then marry me?” Your hand stills in his hair and your eyes fly open.
“What?”
“I’ve had a ring hidden in Buck’s room for a while, just kept waiting for the right time. But this made me think, what the hell am I waiting for?”
“You wanna marry me?” You breathe and he gives you a sweet smile.
“Hell yea I do Sweetheart. What do you say? Will you marry me?”
“Absolutely.” You tell him pressing your mouth to his. Steve pulls you flush against him and rolls you so you’re underneath him.
“Want me to go get that ring?” He asks when he pulls away, both of you breathing hard.
“Tomorrow. We both need sleep and so does Bucky.”
“Okay.” He agrees and you wrap your leg around his hip and twist him so that he falls to the bed next to you then you slide on top of him. Steve’s hands rest on your back as you lay on top of him you wait until he’s asleep before you finally fully relax and slowly fall asleep.
The next morning you wake up with Steve kneeling next to your bed with a ring in his hand. It’s an oval cut with small curly parts around the diamond and is set in gold.
“Didn’t wanna put it on you until you were awake but I didn’t want to wait either.” He says with a sheepish grin.
“What time is it?”
“5:45.”
“In the morning? Steve.” You groan dropping your face into your pillow.
“Sooner you get this ring on the sooner we can go back to sleep.” He suggests and you can’t help the grin on your face. You give him your hand and he slips the ring on, you watch him as he does and the pleased look on his face makes your heart race.
“Perfect.” You mutter before holding it up and staring at it in the early morning light. “Now, get your ass back in this bed. You know the saying? Happy wife happy life.”
“Yes ma’am.” He says climbing back into bed with you, you lay with your head on his shoulder, his arm curled around you and your left hand on his chest. You watch as your hand raises and falls as he breathes and you can’t believe how fucking happy you are.
“Oh my god. We should go sleep on the couch like this and see who notices first.” You say but when you look up at him Steve is already asleep again. You smile softly then close your eyes, you’re going to marry him and you’re going to spend the rest of your life loving him.
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9h05t-f4c3 · 5 months
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How are you gonna say you’re obsessed with me and then barely talk to me?
I constantly text you knowing you’ll only respond to every 1 out of 5 messages, I tell you I love you every day knowing you never say it first, I constantly think about you even when you’re not here, I don’t like talking to other people because they’re not you, I get jealous and possessive when you talk to literally anyone who isn’t me, I send you lovey dovey memes on Instagram and animals in love on tiktok knowing you’ll ignore them for days then just leave me on seen, I have notifications on for all your socials so I can see as soon as you post, I sleep with your shirt in my bed and cuddle it like it’s another stuffie, I screenshot every message where you call me a pet name or say something sweet and look back on them to cheer myself up, I write you poems about how I wanna keep you hostage and take care of you and how devoted I am to you that I’d mutilate myself for you if you asked me to, I write you poems about how I want you to carve me up and eat me to prove your love and how I wanna crawl inside you so we can be together for eternity and how I want us to only talk to each other, I’ve literally told you multiple times that I want you to be possessive and obsessed with me and how it makes me happy the rare times you actually are-
And I feel bad for all of this because I know it’s not fair to you to ask you for any of this, and I know you have other people you talk to, and I know I’ll always be second place.
I’m so in love with you that I can’t even imagine my world without you in it, I’m too selfish to leave you alone and let you be happy without me because I still love you even if you don’t love me.
But you’re the obsessed one, right?
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gggoode · 1 year
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a tiny tiny little christmas thing I started to write then stopped bc it was too sad then cleaned up and posted anyway :) hope ur all having a lovely Christmas if u celebrate and if not, hope ur having a lovely day!
“What did you do for Christmas last year?” 
Gigi kept looking into her coffee cup. She knew Crystal really liked Christmas but she didn’t think she’d ever had a Christmas she’d really enjoyed.  
The word Christmas didn’t fill her with festive cheer. She associated it with awkward visits with grandparents, family fights, her or her mom crying. Not her favourite holiday, all in all. 
Crystal didn’t seem perturbed by her lack of response. “I didn’t know if you’d be visiting your grandparents again but it was right after you told your parents about being trans, right?”
Gigi nodded and Crystal reached over to squeeze her hand, linking their fingers together. 
They’d become girlfriends just that weekend and Gigi had been a bit terrified that things would change between them but it was only Tuesday and they were already out for coffee, just like always. 
The only thing that had changed was Crystal kissing her cheek in greeting and holding her hand, and Gigi liked that. 
“It was,” she agreed. “I spent it alone with my mom. And spent most of the day crying.” 
“Oh my god, Gigi,” Crystal cooed, shifting closer and wrapping an arm around her. “Why were you crying?” 
Gigi shrugged and rested her head on Crystal‘a shoulder. “I felt like I’d caused mom’s divorce. And I missed you, and I kept thinking about how you invited me to spend Christmas with you the year before and how much I wished I was there.” 
“You should have just come over,” Crystal sighed, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. 
Gigi glanced up at her and scrunched up her nose. “I was really a mess.” 
“I would’ve been happy to see you,” Crystal said anyway. She held onto her for a moment before moving onto the question she’d clearly been leading to. “What are you doing for Christmas this year?” 
“Probably the same but hopefully with less crying,” Gigi said. 
Crystal squeezed her tight. “You know my order still stands. My parents would love to have you.” 
Gigi sighed and tilted her head to kiss Crystal’s cheek. “I don’t wanna leave my mom by herself.”
“Bring her. My mom loves her too.” 
Gigi bit her lip. “They have to cook extra food for us.” 
That made Crystal laugh out loud. “There’s three of us and they already cook enough to feed like ten people. We eat leftovers for weeks.” 
Gigi thought about it for a moment. “It would be nice to spend Christmas with my girlfriend,” she said, which made Crystal beam at her. 
“Ask your mom. And don’t try and be polite about it because my parents will be so excited if you both come over.” 
Gigi didn’t really care about politeness at this point. She’d had enough shitty Christmasses at this point that she thought she deserved a good one with her girlfriend. 
~~~~~~
Gigi woke up on Christmas morning to someone stroking her hair. 
“Crys?” she mumbled, shifting in the bed. It still felt weird waking up in Crystal's childhood room.  It always kind of made her feel like a teenager again, but in a good way. Like she was safe and had nothing to worry about. 
“I’m not usually awake before you,” Crystal said cheerfully, kissing the back of her neck. “Merry Christmas, Geege.” 
Gigi couldn’t help smiling. “Merry Christmas,” she murmured as she rolled over. “This is already the nicest Christmas morning I’ve had.” 
“Me too,” Crystal whispered, pressing a kiss to her lips. “I love waking up with you.” 
Gigi could already hear voices downstairs. Usually that would make her anxious but today it was just Mateo and Linda talking and laughing with her mom. Gigi hugged Crystal tight and sighed. “Thank you for having us over,” she whispered. 
Crystal squeezed her. “It was selfish of me. I just wanted to have you here for myself.” 
“So selfish, wanting me to have a nice Christmas,” Gigi agreed sarcastically, brushing her fingers through Crystal’s hair. 
“Do you want some presents?” Crystal asked brightly, sitting up and dragging a stocking up the bed. 
Gigi tucked herself up against Crystal and smiled to herself, watching as she dug some presents out. “You’re such a cutie,” she mumbled. 
Crystal hummed. “I dunno. These are the presents I didn’t wanna give you with our parents watching,” she said, putting a couple of small wrapped gifts on her chest. 
“Is it naughty?” Gigi asked, sitting up a bit straighter to look at the presents. 
“Open them and see,” Crystal said innocently, wrapping her arm around Gigi. 
Gigi smiled at her for a moment longer before starting to open the gifts. One of them was a little set of flavoured lubes which made her snort. 
“I thought the pumpkin spice might be good,” Crystal said, tapping one of the bottles lightly. 
Gigi laughed. “Sounds delicious,” she agreed. “I’m glad you didn’t give me this in front of our parents,” she said softly, tucking the lube bottles in between them. 
“I just know my mom would have asked what it was,” Crystal agreed, kissing her temple. “Then she probably would have wanted to open them to smell them or taste them or whatever.” 
“A lovely family sharing experience,” Gigi mumbled. 
“I definitely didn’t want them seeing these ones,” Crystal said, putting two more little wrapped squares on Gigi’s lap. 
She opened them carefully. One was a bra and the other was a pair of lacy panties, and when she looked at the label it was from a very trans-friendly company she’d been following on Instagram for a while. 
“These are expensive,” Gigi breathed, running her fingers over the material. 
“You kept saving them to your wish list on Instagram,” Crystal said. “I wanted to treat you. And treat me because I get to see you wearing them. If I’m lucky.” 
Gigi pulled her in for a kiss. “Thank you, Crys,” she mumbled. She dug out her presents for Crystal, putting them on her lap. “If you don’t like them I can get you something else.” 
“I’m sure I’ll like them,” Crystal laughed. She tore open the first gift, which was a little bundle of vintage patches Gigi had been collecting for a while. She seemed delighted as she flicked through them, snuggling up against Gigi. “Where did you get these?” 
“Here and there,” Gigi said fondly. “Even when we weren’t talking. I just got them when they made me think of you.” 
Crystal grinned as she tucked them in beside the bottles of lube. “Because you knew we wouldn’t always be apart.” 
“Exactly,” Gigi agreed. She gave her a card too, looping her arm through Crystal’s. 
It was silly. It was a picture of both of them from the Christmas party Jaida had hosted a couple of weeks ago, and Gigi had written ‘Merry Crysmas’ at the bottom. 
“To Crystal,” Crystal read aloud. “Thank you for everything, I can’t wait to spend all my Christmasses with you for the rest of my life,” she continued. 
Her voice broke halfway through the sentence and Gigi pressed her face into her shoulder. 
“All my love, Gigi,” Crystal finished. She set the card aside and turned to wrap Gigi in a cuddle, rocking them back and forth gently. “I love you so much,” she whispered tearfully. 
“I love you too,” Gigi murmured. “But I don’t think my presents are quite as exciting,” she said apologetically. 
Crystal kissed her cheek. “They’re perfect, Geege. You’re perfect.” 
There was a knock at the door as they cuddled. 
“Come in,” Crystal called. 
It was Linda, because of course it was. She beamed at the sight of them and came over to the bed, perching on the edge and pulling them both into a hug. “My two girls,” she said softly. “Merry Christmas.” 
Gigi was busy tucking the lube and lingerie beneath the duvet. “Feliz navidad,�� she said, only hugging Linda back when they were hidden. 
Linda squeezed her tight. “You just come down whenever you’re ready, we’re having coffee so there’s no rush,” she said. 
“Thanks, mom,” Crystal said cheerfully. “We’ll be down in a bit.” 
Linda kissed both of their cheeks before standing. “Okay! Just take your time,” she said fondly as she left the room. 
Gigi shifted to sit up straighter. “Shall we go?” 
“She said there’s no rush,” Crystal said airily, pulling her back down to lay against the pillows. Gigi had a second to grin before Crystal was kissing her, making her sigh. 
~~~~~~
Christmas with the Methyds was very different. 
Gigi tensed whenever there was a disagreement, expecting it to blow up into a huge argument that would ruin the day and make everyone cry. 
But it didn’t. Of course it didn’t – when Mateo and Linda disagreed on how they were supposed to cook the turkey, they didn’t fight about it. 
They’d started laughing about a previous Christmas when they’d overcooked it and it had been dry, and another Christmas when they hadn’t defrosted it in time and it hadn’t been edible at all. 
She’d spent the day trying and failing to offer help in the kitchen. Her mom was helping Linda and Mateo but they kept sending Gigi back to the living room to sit with Crystal, insisting that they should enjoy their first Christmas as a couple. 
And that they did. They drank a lot, ate a lot, and spent almost the entire day cuddling. 
It was perfect. By the end of the night she was full of food and more than a little bit drunk, and she couldn’t stop smiling even as she snuggled into bed with Crystal in the new pyjamas Mateo and Linda had bought her. 
“Do you like Christmas now?” Crystal asked, holding her close and tangling their legs together. 
Gigi hummed. “I dunno. I can see why you like it so much,” she murmured. She tilted her head to kiss Crystal, sliding her hands up and under her shirt to touch her back. 
“I love you,” Crystal whispered. “Just wait until I take you to spend Christmas with the rest of my family in Mexico.” 
Gigi gasped. “Yes please,” she agreed eagerly. “I’ll even practice my Spanish if it means Christmas in Mexico.” 
Crystal snorted and rested their foreheads together. “Just wait until you meet my cousins. And you’ll get interrogated by my aunts and uncles.” 
“Worth it to spend Christmas with you,” Gigi whispered, tilting her head until she could kiss her again. 
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baecvlt · 3 years
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Hello hello! I looove your work! I was wondering if I could requests Kazuichi taking his best friend(or lover! Just thought friend would make it more interesting) on a late night car ride to test some adjustments he made to it, could end up with some steamy car sex? Hopefully this made sense! I've been craving this kind of fic
Car Sex: Kazuichi Soda x Reader
a/n: It’d be an honor to write this. Hope you enjoy! ALso VERY WELL ESTABLISHED FRIENDSHIP HERE + projecting my interests onto reader because I get selfish AND I feel like Kaz listens to rock/alt/indie music. K byeee. ALSO READER IS FEM, pls specify next time
It was a Friday night, you were out for dinner with your best friend, Kazuichi Soda. You were glad to finally get out the house. It got lonely, plus you got to catch up with him and see him personally. He offered to pay for your meal, you allowed it since this time you were tight on money. As he paid, you notice he was excited about something.
“I know this is so last minute,” he began,“But I was wondering if you’d come back to the shop with me”
You nodded, but remained curious. “Of course, I’ll go, but why?”. He leaned toward you and he was excited. His leg was shaking and hands slightly shaking. “I’m finally finished with my car!,” he cheered,“I want you to be the very first to join me for a test drive!”. You smiled. Kazuichi had been working on this car since high school. He almost gave up on it too, so you were happy he never gave up on it. “Of course I’ll go!,” you told him, just as cheerful as he was. You both has walked to the restaurant, now walked back to the shop.
His family was there, closing the shop up. You obviously greeted them. He walked right past them and to the garage. A sheet was on top of the car. Once you were in the room, he walked towards it. He grabbed the sheet, doing a small countdown. “3..2..1-”. He yanked the sheets off, revealing a new and improved car. “So, what do ya think?”. You were excited with him now. “Jesus, the paint job on this is amazing!,” you said to him. “‘May have taken me my whole high school and half my college experience to finish it, but it was worth it!”.
“Totally”
“What do ya say? Should we take it out for a spin”
“You don’t have to ask me twice”
He cheered quietly, opening the passenger door for you and hopping into the driver’s side. He opened the garage door, pulling out of the driveway. He had only driven down the street and you saw how nervous he was. You grabbed his hand, he gasped when you did. “Hey, I’m sure the car is fine, don’t stress out”. He smiled, putting his arm around you. You relaxed laying back. You drove around for about half an hour, going up some hill to a mountain. “Where are we going?,” you asked him.
“We’re gonna look at the stars”
“Ooo, nice”
He parked by the edge of the mountain. It was weird because no other cars were to be seen. Usually there were. “By the way, I wanna show you the coolest thing here,” he said, opening the glove compartment. He took out a CD, Slowdive's 1993 album Souvlaki, and revealed he had a working stereo. "Holy shit, it works?," you were excited. He nodded, popping in the CD. "I love Slowdive," you mumbled. He smiled, chuckling a little.
"I know. You were listening to it the day we met"
"Oh! I was...Yeah, I remember you came up to me that day. You were so awkward"
"Right? God, I feel like I acted like a douche"
"You were like,'Hey, we shouldn't be able to hear your music'"
"Yeah, yeah. Then you were all,'Oh, sorry!'. Then, I was like,'Don't worry, but anyway, Slowdive, huh?'"
You both laughed. "God, I felt that you were trying to hit on me that moment," You told him,"But you're just...you're really nice". Smiling, he shook his head. "Do you miss high school?," he asked. You thought about it for a moment. Did you? "You know what," you began,"Partially". He was confused. "What do you mean?".
"Well, we all had good times in high school. We had good friends, all those memories. We've kinda drifted away, but that's why I partially miss it"
"So why don't you?"
"I felt like I didn't belong"
He looked at you sympathetically. "You all had an established talent. I didn't," you told him,"Sometimes, I still wish I hadn't gone". Hearing you say so saddened him. "But you're good at a lot," he said,"You were better than everyone there". "You're just saying--".
"No! I swear, you are talented at a lot. It was just never put into one thing. You aren't alone either. Hajime never had an exact talent, Nagito won a lottery...you belonged there just as anybody else. You are a Jack of All Trades—"
"—Master of None."
"NO! You are the master of all!"
You smiled. "I care so much about you. I'm really glad we met. I just know that if we hadn't met my life wouldn't be the way it is now...," he said,"So, please, never say that again! You belonged there". You lay back in your seat, trying not to cry. For the first time in forever you felt like you had a place in the world, it felt weird, but not bad. You weren't used to feeling important. "Are you even happy with your life?". He looked at his thumbs when you asked him that. You were afraid of his answer, you didn't know why, but you were.
"There are somethings I wish I didn't have to deal with, but when I think about you, I realize that it's all worth dealing with...and that makes me the happiest man in the world"
"Kaz..."
He said your name, his voice low when he did. It interrupted anything you wanted to say next and your thoughts were racing. "I..I—". He sighed. You knew whatever he had to say next was not easy for him to spit out. "You know how important this car is was for me, it took up my entire high school year to work on. I know I had fun doing it, but I didn’t build it for me,” he sputtered and you could tell he was nervous,“I made this car so that...so that I'd have something to impress you with the day I had the courage to tell you how I really feel about you. I love you and I have for so long. I don't see myself being with anyone else and I wanted you to think of me as the coolest guy you'd ever met and now you probably think I'm a chump–"
You launched yourself towards him, attacking his lips and you felt his skin radiating. He felt as if he had been kissed by an angel. "I love you too, Kaz," you whispered. You really did. Crawling onto his lap, you pushed his hair back. "I wish it hadn't taken you so long to tell me," you added, frowning,"We could have done all these cute high school couple things, then moved onto adult couple things". He kissed you this time, his hands on your hips as you nibbled his bottom lip. He managed to move you both to the passenger side in order to prevent your back setting the horn off. He stopped for a minute.
"'Adult couple things'?"
"Yeah"
"Well, we're adults now, aren't we? And who says we're too old to do what high schoolers do"
"You're not wrong either...but are you interested in doing adult things with me?"
He blushed and looked away for a minute,"I, uh- I've never done it before. I was waiting do it with someone who loves me, y'know? But- you love me, right?". You laughed, nodding. He laughed too, shaking his head as he reached up your skirt, his calloused and rough hands rubbing your thighs. "Hoh-okay, you asked for it". He leaned forwards to kiss you, grabbing the waistband of your panties as his tongue entered your mouth. He pulled them down, allowing you to remove the rest by making his seat go further back. You kicked them off, going to unzip his jeans and pull those down too along with his boxers. He was already rock hard and made you throb just looking as his cock. It was slightly above average in both length and girth, but what did you expect from a dork like him?
You took off your entire skirt before climbing right back into his lap right after pulling them down, he smirked and lowly praised you: "Good girl". He kissed you a little more before he grabbed his cock, ready to guide it inside you. "You ready?". You were shaking, but uttered a soft,"Yes...". Before he could, the Slowdive song you were listening to when you first met started playing and you knew this was meant to happen. You melted when he heard it too. It means it meant something to him and it meant as much to him as it meant to you. "You remember this song, baby?". He pressed light kisses on your forehead as you nodded. You felt his tip at your entrance and you whined. "W-Wait! Kaz, please be careful," you begged. He nodded and kissed you again. "I'll be soft," he reassured you,"Besides, I want to take my time with you. Okay?". You took a breath and relaxed.
"Okay"
"Uh, wait- I should probably ask. Did you wanna do this laying down? I don't think it's fair if you're on top during our first. Plus, I don't want your back to hurt"
"Y-Yeah, my back was starting to ache a little"
He nodded, putting the seat all the way back, now mimicking a bed. You switched positions, spreading your legs for him. He put the volume on the stereo almost all the way up before picking your legs up. He positioned himself again, pushing in just the tip. You gasped quietly, breaking into a very sweet moan as he pushed in all the way, groaning lustfully. He repeatedly pushed in: deep, but slow. He only felt his erection grow harder seeing you blush. Your little moans and soft whimpers when he'd hit that one spot you thought only you would be able to reach made him twitch inside you. He tried to keep his composure, but your walls constantly pumping him made it almost impossible. He leaned forward, desperately trying to kiss you. You could've melted right then and there, seeing how this man made love to you. "I-I love you..," he whispered against your lips. God, he was so cute too.
"I love you too, Kaz, but this is a little too slow now"
"Please, tell me what you need"
"I want you fuck me harder"
"Whatever you say, princess"
His thrusts went from "slow and deep" to "abrupt and very deep". "Like that?". You kissed him in response, grabbing his hair and pushing his head to you. His hips snapped inside you, making it harder to control your breathing. At this point, the windows as fogged up, making the air around you hot. He grabbed your breast, massaging them. You did him the favor of unbuttoning your blouse. You grabbing his hand and slipped it under your bra. "They're so pretty and warm," he mumbled. You could tell he didn't want you to hear that from how low he said it, but you heard it well. He pulled your bra down to your torso, ducking his head down to be able to suck on your breasts a little. "K-Kaz! I'm really sensitive there!". He didn't respond, so entertained by your boobs, knowing playing with them made you feel good.
Your stomach was in knots and it was hard to hold anything anymore.
It took one really hard thrust, making you squirt. He didn't even know it could do that. You didn't cum all the way through, making it uncomfortable now. You felt like you were being edged. "Kaz, it doesn't feel good anymore".
"Do we stop?"
"No, no! Just...I need to cum"
"I'll get you there"
His hands went back to your hips, slamming into you fast and deep. Your body trembled, shaking as he hit your sweet spot again and again and again. "Is this okay?," his voice husky as he was nearing his orgasm too. You nodded, whining. "I-It feel so good..please don't stop," you cried,"It's so good!..". He went faster, grunting softly. You were near crying, about to release. "Are you gonna cum?". He was just as impatient as you were.
"I'm cumming, I-I'm cumming"
"I can't last anymore. C-Can I cum inside?"
"Please, baby"
He groaned you name, shooting his load in you. You knew it was a lot too, feeling it when you moved. He pulled out, laying on the other seat lazily. You were still so turned on, pumping your two fingers in and out of you, securing his cum inside you. "Good girl". You picked your braw up to cover your chest since it was getting cold. "You look so pretty," he added. You were blushing as he helped you with your clothes. Naturally, you helped him with his. "I hope this is a good time to ask, but...". "Yes?"
"I want you to be my girlfriend"
"I'm so glad you do. Yes, Kazuichi, I'll be your girlfriend!"
"Yes! Fuck Yes! Oh god, I'm so happy!"
You kissed his cheek, making him become even more giddy as he wrapped his arm around you and drove you to his home. Kissing on his bed, he hugged you tightly afterward as you shushed him to sleep.
216 notes · View notes
calpalirwin · 3 years
Text
Permanent Vacation
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Summary: Calum falls for a musician.
A/N: I just really wanted an excuse to use Arrows in Action newest releases in a fic. (They’re bangers. You should go give ‘em a listen.)
Word Count: 2.8k
And away, and away we go!
__
The sun was hot as it beat down on my neck, the line for the beerstand long, and the noises of people chatting excitedly were loud in my ears. But I didn’t care in the slightest. After the isolating shitshow that was quarantine, I was more than happy to be out at a festival with, wait for it, live fuckin’ music. The only way I could be happier was if my band was in the lineup, but this was still a pretty close second. To be surrounded by musicians and people who loved music was a breath of fresh air after so long. A breath of very hot fresh air. But still.
Behind me I heard the girlish giggling and whispers of my name, which drew the attention of the group in front of me: three guys, and a girl around my own age, two of the guys a good shoulder and head taller than the other man and girl. The shortest of the guys whispered, “Could you imagine if we got noticed like that?”
The tall brunette’s eyes went wide as he pulled a face and shook his head. “No, thanks. I think I’d cry.”
The other tall one with purple hair laughed loudly, “Aw, c’mon, that would be rad! His band’s not even in the lineup and he still gets recognized. Could you imagine?”
“He has a name, and can hear you, J,” the girl hissed with a playful eye roll. Then, she flashed me a smile before calling out in a loud voice, “Hey, man! Good to see ya! How ya been?” to me, before taking a step forward and stretching up to wrap her arm around my shoulders like we were old friends. “Just go with it,” she added under her breath. “Nobody’ll bug you for pictures and autographs if you’re with a bigger group.”
“Thanks,” I laughed at her rescue attempt. “But it’s fine if they do. I don’t mind.”
“Yeah, but they can at least let you buy a fuckin’ beer first.”
“Well, thanks again,” I said, not sure of what else to say, or do so I let her pull me up with her friends who were all staring at her with I’m sure the same look of soft shock I had on my own face.
“I’m Y/N, by the way.” She let go of me as she started introducing her friends to me. “And this is Jesse.”
“Hello,” the tall one with purple hair smiled warmly.
“That’s Matt,” she nudged the other tall one.
“Hey.”
“And this is Vic,” she finished, looking at the shortest man who waved.
“Nice to meet you guys. I’m Calum,” I said, then realized how stupid that was. “But, you already knew that, huh?”
Y/N grinned, holding her thumb and index finger close together. “Just a smidge. But it’s cool. So, any bands you’re particularly excited to see?”
“The Maine and All Time Low mostly. I’m a huge fan of The Maine, and All Time Low are friends of mine.”
“Both are great bands. And the All Time Low guys are good friends to have, for sure.”
“Oh, you know them?”
“Yeah, we worked with them a few times.”
“Worked with? Fellow musicians, huh?”
She laughed. “We’re up and comers, yeah.”
“Your cool aunt’s favorite band,” Jesse grinned at me.
Y/N laughed more at the confused look that crossed my face. “That’s one of his favorite ways to refer to us. Like we’re the band you find out from word of mouth from the cool relative that’s always discovering new music.”
“Ah,” I said, nodding in understanding. “Been there. Are you guys in the lineup?”
“Yup!” she chirped happily as we got to the front of the line. “5 beers, please,” she told the person working the counter.
“Oh, you don’t have to,” I tried to decline, reaching quickly for my wallet.
“Relax, it’s just a beer,” she told me, passing me one of the cups being placed on the counter. 
“Well, thanks,” I said, raising the cup and taking a sip. “I’ll getcha guys next time.”
“I’ll hold you to it,” she grinned around the rim of her own cup. “Enjoy your beer, Cal. See ya around.”
~~~
I took the last swallow from my beer, cursing myself for not having stopped her to get the name of her band, or at the very least her last name. But before I had a chance to get the words out, I’d been bombarded with requests from fans for pictures, engaging in small conversations with them, and by the time I was done, Y/N was long gone.
So I resigned myself to walking around the festival grounds, my head reeling. It wasn’t often a woman pretended to be my friend to rescue me from the onslaught of fans. In fact, I couldn’t recall one time that's ever happened. I also wasn’t used to being bought drinks, even if I was still fully intending to return the favor. Although that would require me to find her first. But something told me that wouldn’t be too difficult.
I was grateful I’d come on my own, and not with Ashton who would have no doubt teased me about how hooked I was on the girl. The cynic with a crush? Whatever were the odds? And was it even technically a crush when I’d only interacted with her for maybe five minutes? Okay, maybe Ashton being around wouldn’t be the worst thing if he could help me make sense of the jumble of thoughts in my head. The way that man could bounce from crush to crush almost seamlessly was enough to give me a case of whiplash. 
I sighed as I tossed my cup in the trash. Whether or not it was a crush was still to be determined. All I knew was that I liked her energy, and wanted to see her again. And… that was a crush, wasn’t it? God. Fuckin’. Damn it.
A guitar chord rang out loudly, and there was a mad dash of people running towards the stage. Slowly I pushed my way through the crowd of people towards the front, grinning when I noticed it was her on stage, and grinning even more when I noticed the instrument in her hand. A bassist? Fuck, I was definitely in trouble now.
The shortest of the men, Vic, I recalled, started singing, with the other three providing backup harmony on the chorus. Until they got to the bridge that was all Y/N, her voice ringing out “Tomorrow’s a nightmare, I’m dreaming today. And my head is haunted, the past just can’t stay. The devil you know, yeah he comes and he goes. I’m selfish, and vapid, I hide in my prose!” before they launched into the final chorus.
“What up, Anaheim?!” Vic yelled into his mic to a scream of cheers and applause. “We’re Arrows in Action, and that was our newest single, Only Be Mine. I’m Vic. We got Matt over here on guitar. Jesse’s on the drums. And Y/N’s over there on bass. We got a few more songs for you all. And if you’re an awesome crowd, we might have a special treat for ya at the end of our set. Sound good?”
We answered him in whoops of cheers and loud applause, causing them all to grin as they launched into their next song.
They played seamlessly through about three more songs, enjoying the feeling of playing live in front of people again, before Y/N whooped into her own mic. “Whoo! It’s hot! Anyone else hot? Y’all staying hydrated out there?” she asked us, before flickering her gaze across the stage at Matt who was wiping his forehead. “You good, Matt?”
“Dude, it’s like a million degrees up here,” he commented, before taking a huge swig from a water bottle.
Y/N laughed. “Right. Y’all gotta understand. Matt’s from the cold states. Then there’s Vic and I who are California natives, technically, right Vic?”
“Yeah, I was born here. But I didn’t live here as long as you did.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought. So Vic and I are used to the heat. Matt, not so much. And Jesse? How you doing back there, J?”
“Me?” the drummer pointed at himself in confusion “Oh, I’m great!”
“Great enough to give this crowd a real surprise?” she asked, her voice laced with playful trouble, as she looked at all her bandmates. “C’mon, boys what do ya say? Wanna give this crowd something special before we go?”
Again, we all cheered and applauded as encouragement for whatever surprise they had in mind. “Alright!” Vic laughed. “Alright, you wanna go ahead and introduce it then?”
She smiled wide as she turned towards us. “Alright, everybody! We’re Arrows in Action. We’ve had a great time with y’all! So, as a thank you, we’re gonna play a new song that we haven’t released yet. Is that cool with you?” She laughed as she awaited the response of screaming, whistles, and applause. “Alright. This is called Permanent Vacation, which will be available on all listening platforms this Friday. Let’s go!”
Matt started playing a series of chords that sounded incredibly familiar, while the other three clapped to the beat. But right before the lyrics were supposed to come in, Vic started talking into his mic. “Wait, wait, wait!” he laughed. “I don’t know the lyrics to this!”
“So it’s just like every other song,” Y/N teased him with her own laugh.
“Nah, I think it’s cuz that one’s not ours.”
“Be rad if it was though,” she said, and I swear she shot me a wink. “Alright, alright. So, that one’s not ours. But this one definitely is. And it’s definitely called Permanent Vacation. And it’s out Friday.”
A new guitar and drum beat started up and Vic immediately started singing, again with the rest of the band providing back up vocals until the bridge where it was all Y/N. A soft build before a wild yell that would have torn my own vocal chords to shreds.
“I’m locked and loaded, fire away! Permanent vacation from my brain. Extend my stay another day. Far from home, not alone,” they all finished with a flurry of chords. “Thank you!” Vic croaked into the mic. “Thank you guys so much! We’re Arrows in Action, enjoy the rest of your night!”
With tired but happy smiles, they all bowed before exiting the stage. I moved to follow, but thought better of it, going to hit the drink stand first where I bought 5 beers and 4 waters. A small challenge, made slightly easier by the person working the stand putting the water bottles in a grocery bag for me. With that hanging off my arm, I held 2 beers in each hand, and my own in my teeth.
“Cal!” she laughed, her face flushed when I found them lounging in the grass. “You didn’t have to do that,” she told me as she rose to her feet to help me distribute the beers.
“I said I’d get the next round,” I offered up simply, setting down the bag and taking a seat with them all. “I brought you guys water, too.”
“You really didn’t have to do that,” she laughed, tossing the bottles out anyway, and sitting back down, this time next to me. 
“Shut up, Y/N, let the man do what he wants,” Jesse said, downing a water bottle in 2 gulps before turning his attention to his beer. “You’re rad. Thank you.”
“For real, man. This was really cool of you,” Vic said.
“Yeah, huge thanks,” Matt nodded.
“What they said, I guess,” Y/N laughed again, following Jesse’s lead of downing her water bottle before going for her beer. “Fuck,” she sighed. “That’s good. Thank you, really.”
“Happy to do it,” I answered. “That set was amazing, by the way. And that joke at the end was pretty clever. How long were you planning that?”
She giggled. “Uh, well Jesse and I are much more the 5sos fans than Matt and Vic are. But we’re all familiar with your music. And when we were writing the song, and settled on the title, I suggested that it would be funny to start playing your version if we ever got the chance to play it live. Which meant bugging Matt to learn the guitar parts.”
“So you’re the troublemaker of the band?” I guessed.
She shrugged, and hid behind the rim of her cup. “I mean… Depends on the day.”
We continued to lay in the grass, making small talk as we all finished our beers, before Jesse cleared his throat. “Uh… Matt, Vic. You guys wanna come with me to get a good spot for the rest of the acts?” he asked, the suggestion in his tone heavy.
Matt and Vic shared a look, before nodding. “Yeah, yeah of course,” they said, all three of them getting up.
“You assholes are just gonna leave me?” Y/N asked, looking up at them.
“Just come find us when you’re ready,” they winked. “Thanks again for the beers, Cal.”
“Assholes,” she muttered again as they all made themselves scarce. “Sorry about them.”
I laughed, waving it off. “Nah, it’s cool. And kinda nice, maybe?”
“Oh?” she asked, her eyes wide. “Uh…” her face flushed. “I mean…” she started to stammer. “Yeah. Yeah.”
I gave a half chuckle, scratching at the back of my neck. “Look, it’s fine if you’re not… I mean, I figure you probably are if they did that for you, cuz they have no reason to do it for my sake. I mean, they’re your friends and bandmates, not mine. But I know a wing man set up when I see it. But if it’s more of a meddling wing man set up, like that’s fine,” I spilled out, before realizing I was rambling.
“No!” she rushed. “Oh, no, that’s not what I meant at all!” She covered her face in her hands, groaning “Oh, this is so embarrassing…” Her hands moved to push through her hair as she took a long breath to steady herself. “Of course I like you, Cal. Like before I even met you. One of those embarrassing fangirl crush type of deals. And I mean, I’m a bassist in a punk band, so you’re also someone I idolize and take inspiration from.” Slowly her gaze lifted from her lap to lock onto mine. “And then I met you today. And  you’re everything I thought you’d be. Thoughtful. Generous. A bit shy, and quiet at times. Nice. And it makes the crush that much stronger, and harder to deal with. Cuz now it’s real. And I feel like I know you. And it’s just… Ugh, it spirals from there, ya know?”
“A good spiral, or a bad spiral?”
“Bit of both? Like the insecurities in me say that you’re an A-list celebrity, while I’m more of like… not an A-lister. My band’s not on the same level yours is. I mean, we play bars and small day festivals. You sell out stadiums and have world tours. There’s a clear discrepancy. But then, another part of me doesn’t give a shit about that. It sees how we’re like-minded. It sees all the ways we click, and all the ways we could work. And that’s where the cocky part comes in, where it sees the like-mindedness and the reasons we could work, and calls you an idiot if you can’t see it too. That, uh, screwed up defense mechanism of it being your loss, ya know?”
“Mhm.”
She sighed. “Sorry. I said a lot. Point is, I do like you. And, that’s that.”
“So the ball’s in my court?”
“Only if you want it to be. And if you don’t, then no. There’s no ball. No court. Just two people who have a few things in common.”
“You wanna hear what I think?”
“Go for it.”
“I think your friends left us for 2 reasons. 1 being that they’re loyal to you, and know how you feel about me. 2 being that they’re also guys. Which gives them a pretty good insight for how I’m feeling too.”
“Uh-huh…” she nodded slowly. “And how you’re feeling is…?”
I could have said the words. But I settled for leaning in, brushing my lips softly against hers for the sweetest of moments, listening to the way her next breath got stuck in her throat. I pulled away, smiling softly at her and shrugging my shoulders.
She traced her lips with her thumb, bewilderment written on her face. “Okay, you really didn’t have to do that.”
“Relax,” I chuckled, stealing her words from earlier. “It’s just a kiss.”
“Well, thanks. I’ll, uh, getcha next time.”
“I’ll hold you to that.”
__
Tag List
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semisgroupie · 3 years
Text
 The Woman Who Used to be Mrs. Jones
Genre: smut, fluff (kinda at the end?), angst
Pairing: Aoi Todo X F!Reader
Word Count: 6.4k words
Warnings (some of the content can be triggering so please read through the warnings before reading this): cheating (in this Todo is the other man/reader is in a loveless marriage where her husband cheats on her/her husband is just a huge asshole), toxic relationship, sexual scenes, unprotected sex (don’t be silly wrap your willy), oral sex (f! and m! receiving), dirty talk, multiple creampies, bathroom sex, praise, risky sex (they fuck at a party the reader and her husband is hosting), mention of a small altercation between Todo and reader’s husband, mention of a child & brief mention of pregnancy (not detailed),  if I missed anything let me know
A/N: I do not condone, support or encourage cheating! It is not good, don’t do it! The song Me and Mrs. Jones by Billy Paul helped me with creating this piece so I recommend listening to it while reading this. This has depicted sex within this so MINORS DNI (I’m not gonna cry bc I don’t cry but I am not afraid to beat some ass) So I hope you all enjoy it, comments/reblogs are very appreciated!!! I also apologize in advance if formatting is weird on mobile :/
Flashbacks are bolded & italicized! Also separated by a border!
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Todo walks up to the counter of the cafe and orders the usual for the both of you. He came early since he was done with work earlier than usual so after paying for the drinks he carried them to the special spot you two shared. Once seated he takes his phone out to check the time while taking a sip from his drink.
The time read 5:45. You got out fifteen minutes ago and your job wasn’t too far from the cafe, so you’d be there soon. The bell chimed to the cafe and Todo looked up to see you walk in.
His heart pounded in his chest, you looked as beautiful as you did the first day he met you all those years ago in high school. Once you two made eye contact you flashed him a smile and made your way over to him.
“Hey baby, I didn’t think you’d be here before me.”
He felt his cheeks flush at the pet name. You leaned down to hug him and give him a kiss, placing your hands on each side of his face caressing him as your lips met. Once you pulled away you sat down and started talking about your day at work.
He couldn’t help but lose focus as to what you were saying. He knew your day was tough from how your hair looked a bit disheveled from running your hands through it, a habit you had picked up when you were extremely stressed.
Time passed as the two of you spoke about each other’s days and then you were both done with your drinks.
“Wanna go home now Aoi? As much as I love it here I found this new recipe online that I would really like to try out!”
He nodded as you both got up, tipped the cashier one last time before heading to your shared home. The distance was short from where you both were currently and when you two were together even one hundred miles would feel like two blocks.
As Todo put the key in to unlock the door he sighed in content. Once you both were inside he took your jacket off and put it away. He leaned on the kitchen island while you started taking out ingredients for dinner.
“This isn’t a dream right Y/N?”
It just felt so unrealistic to him he just had to be dreaming. Your laughter filled the air as you walked towards him. You wrapped your arms around his body and looked up at him.
“While we did this in the most unconventional way it is very much real” you removed your left hand from his body to put your hand close to his line of view, “this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.”
Unconventional? Was that even the right word to explain the events that led you both to where you are now?
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You started your arrangement with him two years ago. You became “Mrs. Jones” a year before that. A happy marriage was wished to the both of you, but your marriage was anything but that. Six months after you both said your I do’s you found your husband in bed with his boss. They didn’t even think about trying to conceal their affair.
To say it broke your heart was an understatement. You felt like he ripped your heart out of your chest and destroyed it slowly as you watched. Soon there were lonely nights filled with you drinking and crying yourself to sleep. Soon after you just became numb, you got used to putting up a facade whenever your friends or family asked how married life was.
The only one who knew of the affair and how horrible your marriage actually was, was your best friend Valerie. When she first found out you had to hold her back the next time she saw him because she was just filled with rage. You were trying to find a good divorce attorney, but you just didn’t have enough money yet, so you were stuck for the time being. Then it was time to plan how to celebrate one year since the day you married him.
Valerie said that she would bring a special surprise for you, but you just pushed it to the side. You settled on hosting a party at your parent’s house since it was big enough. The fake smile you had plastered on your face burned your soul more than the cheap ring on your finger. A cheap ring that meant the entire world one moment but now means absolutely nothing.
You were leaning on the wall, holding a glass of champagne, next to your husband as Valerie approached you.
“Y/N! You look absolutely stunning!” she gave your husband a side glance as she begrudgingly said his name, “Declan... anyways I have your surprise so come with me to the backyard!”
Before you could say anything she grabbed your hand and weaved both of you through the crowd of people. She opened the door and you almost dropped your glass at the sight.
“Aoi? I thought you were away in Sweden?”
Todo brings a hand to his neck.
“I was but my job relocated here, and Valerie told me everything. As much as I’d love to say congratulations, I can’t.”
Your body moves on its own as you approach him and hug him. He holds you on instinct and all that is heard is sniffles. You move back and quickly apologize for your abrupt actions.
“Hey, don’t apologize pretty girl” he brought his hands to cup your face and wiped the tears from your face, “Declan should be the one apologizing, how could he take someone like you for granted. I know you might not believe me, but you look just as beautiful as you did when we were in high school.”
The two of you were high school sweethearts but got accepted into different colleges. The inevitable happened and you both broke up, heading your separate ways losing contact. The last thing you heard about him was he had a job in Sweden and that was it. After college you met Declan and he seemed like a knight in shining armor, but it was too late for you to realize he was the devil in disguise.
You leaned into his touch as if you two were the only ones there. Only if he was the one you married; you both would be so happy. You wouldn’t have to worry about any mistresses or affairs because even in this moment you felt all his love. Todo moved in and before you knew it you felt his lips on yours.
You melted into the kiss immediately kissing him back until he abruptly pulled away.
“I am so sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean to you’re still married, and this is the anniversary party and he’s inside—”
“I don’t care about Declan. The only one I care about is you. Valerie always says I should be a little selfish and now is the time. I still care about you Aoi, I still love you. The piece of my heart that left with you is now back and I’m whole again. I understand if you’re not comfortable with this, I am trying to find a lawyer and once I get the promotion at my job I can finally pay for one.”
You looked up at him hoping he would indulge you in one last kiss even if it would be the last one you two ever shared. You watched as a smile grew on his handsome face.
“I love you too Y/N, I always had and I always will. When Valerie told me about everything I cannot explain the anger I felt not only at him but also myself. If I never left then you wouldn’t be in this situation. Maybe you would’ve been with me.”
He leaned down and placed another kiss on your lips. Before it could continue Valerie ran out to the both of you.
“Hey lovebirds as much as I love seeing you two together Declan is starting a toast and wants his wife by his side.”
She rolled her eyes as your husband’s name left her lips. You took a deep breath and turned inside, Valerie and Todo following you. You took another deep breath as you made your way to your husband putting up the fake smile. He handed you a glass of champagne and started the toast.
“This past year with my beautiful wife by my side has been the best year of my life. Waking up next to her every morning is what fuels my fire. I love this woman so much and marrying her was the best decision of my life. Thank you all for coming and supporting us. Here’s to a happy, healthy marriage and for many more years to come!”
As glasses clinked and cheers filled the room you were filled with disgust at his words. How could he spew such garbage knowing it meant absolutely nothing?
“Come on honey, you can do a better job with that fake fucking smile. Make everyone believe that we’re in love and that I haven’t fucked almost every single one of my coworkers. Maybe I’ll even indulge in you tonight.”
“Fuck you Declan, you piece of shit.”
You excused yourself to the bathroom shoving your heel into his foot making him wince in pain. Todou followed you upstairs a few minutes afterwards hearing your sobs. He knocked on the door once, twice until your shaky voice responded.
“Hey it’s me, I wanted to check on you.”
He waited hearing your heels click on the ground until you reached the door to open it. You looked up at him with tear stained cheeks, eyes puffy from all the rubbing and wiping your tears away. Todo looked at you with so much love it was as if Eros struck him with his bow.
He quickly placed his lips on yours, the kiss feverish but also very loving. As if he was telling you how much he loved you each time his lips met yours. He picked you up and placed you on top of the bathroom sink, quickly running to shut and lock the bathroom door.
“Please let me make you forget about him. Please let me show you what it is like to make love and not fuck. Please Y/N.”
All you did was nod before placing your lips back on his allowing your hands to slide down and undo his belt. He allowed you to undo his belt and pants letting them hit the ground while he was lifting the skirt of your dress up.
“As much as I’d love to take my time worshipping your body we have to make this pretty quick beautiful. But please if you want to stop at any time stop me.”
You nodded at him as you felt his hand lightly graze your clothed pussy. He moved your panties to one side as he slipped a finger in, slowly moving it then inserting a second finger moving it just as slow but each movement made you moan and shiver. You started getting impatient and you grabbed his wrist.
“Please Aoi, please make love to me.”
He slotted his lips against yours again as he removed his cock from his boxers. Moving the tip against your folds making you both moan in the kiss. Once he entered you, slowly and gentle, you broke away from the kiss to throw your head back and moan. Once you gave him the okay he started thrusting.
“Fuck, you’re so tight baby. Just holding me like you don’t want me to let go.”
He moved faster hitting all the right spots. It was as if his cock was designed to fit inside your pussy. Both of your moans and groans filled the small bathroom. It quickly became heated as the mirror started to fog up. He started thrusting into you faster and harder making you throw your hands on the mirror for stabilization.
He placed sloppy kisses along the column of your neck. He lifted himself from your neck to lick two of his fingers and place them on your clit, moving them in small tight circles.
“Come on baby cum for me. Cum all over my cock and I will fill you up. I’ll make this pretty little pussy so fucking messy with my cum and you’ll walk around in that party filled with it. You look so fucking gorgeous baby. I love you so much.”
That sent you off the edge, creaming on his cock with a high pitched moan of his name. He continued pounding your pussy through your orgasm as he was nearing his own. You pulled him in for another kiss running your nails up and down his clothed chest. Feeling your nails against him made him reach his own peak, filling you completely with his cum.
Todo peppered kisses along your lips, swollen and puffy from kissing so intensely, as you both came down from your highs.
“I’m going to pull out now okay?”
“Okay that’s fine.”
You didn’t need to tell Todo to be gentle, he was already treating you like fine glass. He slowly pulled out and quickly moved your underwear to cover your cum filled pussy. A low chuckle left his lips.
“Don’t want you leaking cum all over the place.”
He lifted you off the bathroom sink after picking up both his pants and boxers. Before you could even smooth out your dress Todo did it for you, fixing any flyaways in your hair and placing one last kiss on your lips. He unlocked the door and helped lead you to the stairs.
“We should head down at separate times so we don’t look so suspicious.”
You nodded, placing one last kiss one his lips.
“I love you Aoi.”
“I love you too Y/N.”
You went downstairs and walked to your parents. You had a small limp and it filled both Aoi and yourself with joy seeing how your husband stared, completely confused at you. Valerie leaned next to you close to your ear.
“I already gave Aoi your phone number, go get that dick again.”
She lightly smacked your ass, a small yelp leaving your lips. The party went on for a couple more hours, lingering glances shared between you and Todo. When the party ended you had to figure out a ride situation since your husband drank way too much and you were a little tipsy.
Declan’s brother offered to take him back and before he could offer you a ride Todo came up and offered to take you home, to which you immediately agreed. The ride was filled with laughter and talk of memories. Also, when Todo parked at a secluded area near where you live you thanked him for the ride with a mind blowing blowjob.
He dropped you off in front of your place, being the gentleman he is, he walked you to the front door giving you one last kiss.
“I hope to see you again soon beautiful angel.”
“How about tomorrow? We could go get drinks or dinner.”
“There’s a cafe near my job, I’ll text you the address. Meet me there tomorrow when you’re done with work.”
You nodded as you fished your keys out of your purse. Taking a deep breath you unlocked the door and put your things away, heading straight to the guest bedroom because you refuse to sleep in the same bed Declan had all his whores in.
You thought he went to sleep until you heard a groan of your name. You rolled your eyes and continued going to the guest bedroom, ignoring him until you felt a hand grab your wrist.
“What do you want Declan?”
“What, I can’t touch my wife? You looked really sexy tonight so I thought I might do you the favor of fucking you.”
Fire burned in your veins. Every time you tried to pull yourself away from his hold, his grip got tighter.
“Declan, you’re drunk, and I hate you. Even if I was drunk I still wouldn’t go to bed with you, so make good friends with your hand or call one of your whores up because I will never sleep with you again.”
He turned you around.
“Listen here you bitch, you will never talk to me like that ever again. I did you the fucking favor of marrying your sorry ass now you treat me like this? I haven’t touched you in fucking months and this is what you tell me? Fuck you.”
“My sorry ass? Did me a favor? Did you also do me a favor by cheating on me over and over again? Did you do me a fucking favor then Declan? Rubbing it in my face that you didn’t love me the way I loved you, fucking anything that had tits and bringing them back here. I. Fucking. Hate. You. Rot. In. Hell. I don’t know what those girls see in you anyways, I had to fake almost all my orgasms and your dick has a weird curve, you should go see a doctor for that actually. I can’t wait until I have the money to divorce you and properly leave your sorry ass in the dust.”
You snatched your arm from his grip and locked yourself in the guest bedroom. You took off the heels and unzipped your dress letting it hit the ground as you made your way to the bathroom that was connected to the room. You took off the ring on your left hand flushing it down the toilet.
“That’ll be the last I see of you.”
You turned on the shower letting the water run, steam filling up the bathroom fogging up the mirror. You slipped your panties off the memory of your time with Aoi in the bathroom of your parents’ house filling your mind as you picked up the cum stained panties and put them in the laundry basket.
You entered the shower letting the water run over your body. After your shower you put your pajamas on and sent a goodnight text to Todo setting up the time for meeting at the cafe tomorrow. The next morning you woke up to an empty house, you let out a sigh of relief not wanting to deal with Declan after the stunt he pulled last night.
Your day at work went fairly quickly then it was the end of your workday. Inputting the address Todo gave you into the GPS you realized the drive was going to be pretty short. Once you found parking you walked into the cafe, the little bell on the door chiming with the movement. You looked around and saw Todo sitting at a corner side table, isolated from most of the crowd.
That’s when you started the arrangement. He was fine with being the sideman for now until he could properly have you to himself. Little dates and mind blowing sex filled your lives for the next four months.
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~Four Months Later~
Todo was sitting at the table that basically became the unofficially assigned table for you both as he heard the chime to the door. His head shot up expecting you to come through the doorway. It was just an elderly couple. He checked his phone again, checking for any new messages from you and nothing. Just the last message that read: “I’ll see you soon my love”.
Today was the day you would find out if you got the promotion. With the promotion you would get a huge increase in your salary and a $2,000 advance once it was official. $2,000 was the amount you needed to finally afford the divorce lawyer.
Ten minutes passed and Todo ordered another drink for himself. To say he was nervous for you would be an understatement. He was fidgeting like crazy. He received the drink and sat back down at the table. The door chimed again and he looked up to finally see you.
You waved at him and gave him a small smile. Worry filled him and he was afraid to ask you how everything went.
“There’s no way she didn’t get the promotion. She has the best relationship with her boss and she works so hard.” He thought to himself.
You greeted him with a kiss on his head and sat down. He stood silent watching you.
“So I should tell you about what happened at work right Aoi?”
“You don’t have to honey, it’s fine.”
A smile graced your face, a genuine smile, the only type of smile that you shared with Todo since he filled you with genuine happiness.
“I got the promotion.”
Todo sat there in shock.
“What? What did you just say?”
“I got the promotion. I just came back from meeting the divorce lawyer to fill out necessary paperwork, that’s why I came so late.”
He got up from his seat and lifted you up into his arms.
“I’m so happy. I could yell from the rooftops.”
So he did the next best thing, he yelled about your promotion to the entire cafe. The people inside applauded you and gave you words of encouragement. The elderly man approached the both of you after Todo put you down.
“Congratulations to you young lady. This young man seems to be extremely proud of you. I didn’t mean to interrupt the celebration but it’s just that the both of you remind both my wife and I of us when we were younger. While we met under unconventional circumstances we have spent the past 30 years together. I wish you both a happy, healthy relationship.”
You both thanked the old man and watched him walk back to his wife.
“Do you think we’ll be like them one day Aoi?”
He pulled you close to him.
“I don’t think we will, I have a feeling I know we will. Now let’s go pick up your things and bring you back to my place to properly celebrate.”
He drove you to your house and walked with you inside to pack your clothes. In the midst of packing things you both heard the front door slam shut, meaning one thing: Declan was home.
“Care to explain the car in front Y/N? I know you don’t have enough money to afford a new one.”
You sighed and continued packing with Todo.
“I was asking you a fucking question -- oh who’s this? Why are you packing? Oh I get it now, finally got a new guy to deal with your shit? Good luck buddy--”
Before Declan could get another sentence out Todo walked over and shoved him against the wall.
“Don’t you ever speak to Y/N like that again asshole. For your information, she’s leaving you and coming with me. A guy who actually loves her.”
Declan stood there shocked that someone stood up to him. Once you zipped up your bag Todo left Declan to help you. Todo walked behind you with your bag in his hand. You turned one last time to Declan.
“Oh by the way I’ve been having sex with Aoi for the last four months and the first time was at the anniversary party. The reason I was limping was because of him not because of my heels. And you’ll be getting my divorce papers soon, go fuck yourself Declan.”
You walked with Todo to his car and he drove you back to the cafe so you could bring your car to his place. Once you entered through the front door he was on top of you. Placing sloppy kisses all over your lips and neck.
“You looked so fucking sexy there Y/N.”
He picked you up and brought you to his bedroom while you were peppering kisses along his neck. He put you on the bed and started stripping, you followed suit until you were left in your bra and panties and he was left in his boxers.
He pushed you down on the bed and crawled over you. Placing kisses down your body, removing your bra once he got to your chest and removing your panties once he got to your hips. Not one inch of your body was left untouched by his lips except your pussy. The place you needed him most.
“Aoi please.”
“Please what baby? Tell me what you want.”
“Need you—your mouth on my pussy please.”
He wasted no time. He licked from your leaking entrance to your engorged clit. Making you throw your head back.
“I don’t know how but you taste better every time. I’m fucking addicted to how you taste.”
He dove back in, wrapping his lips around your clit and using a finger to tease your entrance. He was alternating between light sucks and harsh sucks making you buck your hips against his mouth.
“Aoi please fuck me. Wanna cum on your cock please.”
He gave your clit one last suck and took the finger he used to circle your entrance and put it in your mouth. The feeling of your tongue swirling around his finger made him even harder if that was possible. He stood up and took off his boxers, throwing them to a random area in the room.
He spit on his hand and pumped himself a few times as he made his way back on the bed.
“Are you ready my love?”
You spoke breathlessly “yes Aoi, please.”
He aligned himself and entered you slowly, going inch by inch until he bottomed out inside you. A moan leaving both of your lips.
“And correction my love, I don’t fuck you” you furrowed your brows but that expression quickly changed when he pulled himself back until only the head of his cock was inside you and he bottomed out again in a swift movement, “I make love to you.”
He leaned down placing his forearms on either side of your head slotting his lips against yours. His thrusts slowly increase in speed. He breaks the kiss to praise you.
“My beautiful girl is so talented. You look so gorgeous right now. So fucking beautiful, I love you Y/N. I love you so much.”
“Aoi, feels s’good. Please I’m gonna cum soon. You fill me so good, like you were made for me.”
You wrap your legs around his waist and he slides his hand down between the two of you to rub circles around your clit. Your moans start increasing in pitch signaling that you’re going to cum. You bring your hands to his back and rake your nails down, digging into his skin, sure to leave marks. His ruts increased in speed bringing you to your orgasm.
“Fuck baby you’re clenching my cock so tight. I’m gonna cum so deep in your pussy baby. I’m gonna fill you up every single day because now you are mine.”
He emphasized each word with a hard thrust. He buries his face in the crook of your neck. Once he cums he sinks his teeth in trying to conceal the guttural moan that leaves his mouth. Coming down from his high he lifts his head up.
“I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to—”
“There’s no need to apologize Aoi, I’m sorry about the scratches on your back.”
“Don’t apologize pretty girl, with how often we’re going to be making love I’ll get used to it.”
He slowly pulled out and you felt the cum leak out of you. He picked you up and carried you bridal style to the shower. Let’s just say both of you were lucky that the neighbors were gone for the night.
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~1 year later~
The both of you have been together for a year and four months. Todo was by your side the entire time throughout the divorce preceding. Comforting you and supporting you the entire time. Once your divorce was finalized your relationship received an official title.
Both of you were extremely happy but there was the voice in the back of Todo’s head that gave him doubts. When he went to go engagement ring shopping with Valerie the voice was there.
As he picked out the perfect ring for you the voice was there. His head was filled with doubts. Of course he loved you, he loved you more than anyone or anything in the world. He knew you loved him. His love for you was immortal, unconditional but he wasn’t so sure if it was the same for you.
That voice in his head hammering doubts over and over again it made him nervous. He started to wonder if he should bring the ring back. If he should change his mind. It was that voice.
“What if she gets tired of you like her husband did with her? What if she finds someone better than you? What if she doesn’t love you as much as you love her? Could you handle the heartbreak Aoi? Could you?”
He started getting distant from you, less kisses in the morning, leaving without saying goodbye, barely initiating sex, it made you worried. What if he’s getting tired of you like Declan? You texted him wanting to meet at the cafe after work. He just sent back a simple “okay”.
Reading it made you even more nervous than before. When you were done with work you drove as slow as you possibly could to the nearby parking lot. You opened the door to the cafe and once you looked around you saw Todo there, fidgeting.
“Is he going to end things with me? We were supposed to move to the new house next week.” You wondered to yourself, you both had so many plans for the future but the future is uncertain.
You sat down and it was silent. He nudged your drink over to you and that was the most interaction you got from him since you got there. It killed you to not talk to him and it was killing him too.
“Y/N, I’m scared.”
You looked into his eyes and saw the fear within them. But what could he possibly be scared about?
“Aoi, what’s wrong? What’s scaring you?”
“What if you get tired of me? What if you meet someone better than me? What if—”
“Aoi. Stop that please” your voice started shaking, it broke your heart to see the man you love being plagued with such fears.
“Aoi, I love you. I love you more than anything in the world. You’re my love. You’re my soulmate. You make me happier than anyone in this world. You brighten up my day, the small things you do make me fall even more in love with you.”
You got up and bent down to hug him. You pulled back holding his face in your hands.
“Aoi I will never get tired of you. I let you leave me once and I never plan on doing it ever again. I love you Aoi Todo, I will love you until my heart stops beating and I will love you long after that. In every life I will look for you to recreate this love over and over again. If I had to go back in time I would go through this all over again just to be right here with you.”
Tears were falling down both of your faces by the time you stopped speaking. You wiped his tears away and he lifted his hands to wipe yours away. He pulled your face closer to his and kissed you.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m so so sorry.”
He muttered apologies against your lips and when you both pulled away it was his turn to speak. You sat back down holding his hands above the table.
“I just got scared Y/N. I love you so much and I just can’t imagine my life without you. I look forward to the future with you, I want you by my side through every single endeavor. You’re my everything. You’re the sun that brightens my day. You’re the stars that shine through my night sky. You’re the air that I breathe. I love you.”
You stood up and pulled him along with you as you both walked out of the cafe. You drove the both of you home and once you entered you led him to the bedroom. Once you entered you undid his work shirt and pants stripping him to his underwear. You led him to the bed and sat him down.
“I never want you to question my love for you ever again.”
You kissed him and placed kisses down his body. Little nibbles along his pecs, a flick of your tongue along his nipples, slow sensual kisses until you reached the waistband of his boxers. You tugged at the waistband and he lifted his hips to help you properly take them off.
His cock slapped against his abdomen. You took it in your hand and gave it a few gentle strokes. You placed featherlight kisses from the head of his cock to the base. You took his head into your mouth swirling your tongue around it and letting it go with a pop.
You took your hand and spit on it using it to lube his cock for you and you started to take more of him into your mouth. His moans and groans filling the room along with the sounds of you gagging yourself on his cock.
When you popped up for air looking at him he could swear he just saw a goddess in front of him. Even with your saliva and tears coating your face he has never seen anyone more beautiful than you. Even Aphrodite herself could not even come close to your beauty.
You got up and stripped off your clothing. You pushed him back gently to lay on the bed as you straddled him aligning his cock with your pussy. You sunk yourself down onto him, he tossed his head back into the bed feeling your warm slick walls welcome him in.
You started moving up and down slowly before gaining a rhythm bouncing on his cock. You moved your upper body close to his grabbing his face and making eye contact.
“I love you—ah fuck—Aoi. I love you so much. You fuck me so good. You are so handsome. Thank you for loving me.”
You felt his arms reach around your waist as planted his feet on the ground to pound into you. Once he started jackhammering into you repeatedly hitting your g-spot you felt yourself cumming around him over and over again.
He used this position to pull as many orgasms as he could from you until he had his own and with how tight you were around him it would be extremely soon. You felt his cock twitch inside you.
“Please cum inside me Aoi, please please please. I need you to fill me up please I need your cum.”
He pulled you down and his hips lifted bottoming out inside you, filling you with his cum. You let your full weight go onto him as you were catching your breath. Hard breaths filled the room. You looked at him and kissed him again.
“I love you Aoi.”
“I love you more Y/N.”
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The following week you both moved into your forever home. Todo made dinner and ordered your favorite dessert to celebrate the move. It was also the day that he was going to propose. He knew how much you hated public proposals and receiving unnecessary attention so why not do it at home?
When you were doing the dishes making small conversation on how you saw a documentary about female serial killers he got the ring and went on one knee.
“So all of her victims were just random men who had green eyes, isn’t that—”
“Y/N.”
You turned around and dropped the sponge in your hand. Your jaw drops at the sight of the man you love and the most beautiful ring you have ever seen.
“Y/N, you have made me the happiest man the past year and four months. Time with you has been amazing. You make me feel like I have been floating on air and I never want to come down. I love you so much. Will you continue this journey of life with me, as my wife?”
“Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!”
You bent down to kiss him and he slipped the ring on your left finger. A few seconds later Valerie called, already aware of what Todo was planning to do. You set the date of the wedding six months from the day of the proposal.
The wedding was small and filled with only close friends and family. It was the happiest day of your life and everyone preferred Todo over your ex husband, even your father, who never liked any of your boyfriends.
“I like this guy a lot Y/N, I mean I’ve always liked him.”
“Dad you threatened to hunt him down when we first started dating in high school.”
“Oh honey it’s just dad stuff but that was a promise and it still stands.”
“Dad! He’s not like that, he makes me feel like I’m the only woman in the world and like I’m a precious gem.”
You both looked over at Todo sharing a dance with your mom and when he looked at you, you could see your future in them. Wherever he would go you would be there beside him as his wife.
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“this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.” Todo leaned forward and kissed you holding you in his arms. 
“I never thought that one person could make me feel so loved and make me feel so much love for them Y/N.”
Now married life was doing the both of you well. Nothing could tear the both of you apart. Not even the news on your one year anniversary that you both were going to have your first child. If Todo felt like he was on cloud nine before then holding your beautiful, healthy son in his arms made him feel he was in seventh heaven. 
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A/N pt2: thank you all for reading this, I’m really excited about how this work turned out I hope you all enjoyed it. This is by far my longest fic so I really appreciate you reading it through. I have much more on the way, if you have any requests my ask is open! Again thank you so much for reading I appreciate you all! — D <3
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shoichee · 3 years
Note
Hey! I read your Kise imagine recently and I adore it, it's rare to see someone write about manga!kise and I really loved it. Furthermore your writing is so so good to read 🥰 I wanted to ask you Kise x reader prompt 1! I would really like to read about him in such a situation ☺ Thank you Iain advance 😘
WAHHH TYSM ANON <33 IM SO HAPPY HEHE, and phew yall thought asshole kise was something but... have yall heard of TEIKO-era asshole kise??! NO?? dw, bc he’s debuting here // i wanted to really showcase his dual sides through more of dialogue (so we won’t really see what’s in Kise’s mind for this), so here it is hope you enjoy this anon! 
Kise x Reader
Prompt: “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.”
Word Count: 2120
prompt list here
»»————— ☼ —————««
“We’re not just friends and you fucking know it, Kise.”
“Huh?” he mocks with a condescending tone. “I didn’t peg you as someone who’d pull shit out of their ass like my last ‘ex-girlfriend.’ Just because I let you hang around me doesn’t mean you can parade around campus with an inflated ego.”
Your hands shake furiously at your sides, trying not to punch the basketball player square in the face.
“Me? With an ego? Look who’s damn talking!” you seethe. “I’m tired of the fact that we keep playing this stupid flirting game for months, only for it to go absolutely nowhere!”
“Have you ever stopped to use your brain and think about how flirting inherently is done in good casual fun?” Kise explains slowly, implying that you were the immature one in the situation. “Meanwhile, you have the audacity to get mad at me when you’re the one who’s using me for your own selfish gain!” Kise sends a heated glare but his eyes were tinged with betrayal.
“What the hell are you even talking about? Are you out of your mind?”
“Fuck this,” he scoffs, throwing his hands up in mock surrender. “I’m leaving, I’m not dealing with this shit anymore. If you want attention, I’m not gonna entertain you anymore.”
“No, you will not leave!” you yell, trying to stop Kise in his tracks. He merely ignores you as he holds up a hand to do a wave with his back to you. “You’re going to explain what the hell you were talking about!”
You sprinted and held onto his sleeve to tug him back to face you, only to be met by the most bone-chilling gaze from him. You would’ve absolutely cowered in his presence if it wasn’t for the fact that you were irrationally angry from the false accusations Kise threw at you prior. You can definitely tell that Kise was biting his inner cheek to keep himself reasonably calm.
“Ryōta,” you say.
“Don’t call me by my first name anymore,” he says flatly.
“Where did you get the idea that I was using you?”
“Hah! Why? Does it matter? Are you gonna go to them and try to threaten them after? It’s so clear from the way you’re talking right now that you only see me as a prize to show off.” You inhale a huge breath to stop yourself from saying something you’ll regret.
“I never saw you as some object, Ryōta,” you mildly scoff. “Let me make myself clear. All I wanted was a clear answer from you every time I asked you if you wanted something serious, but every single damn time, you changed the subject or never answered the question!”
“It’s all done in good fun. Does it really need to be serious?”
“But I want something serious with you!”
Kise merely turns away in silence, but you can see his body slightly tremble.
“... Ryōta?”
“Don’t lie to me like that…” he says, slightly sucking a breath. “... Look, if you really wanna use me to boost your popularity, just… just come clean, okay? I’ll go along with it if you tell me now. After all, we’ve been… good friends.”
“Lie? Why would I lie? I never thought once of using you or having any motives other than to get to know you personally as a friend, Ryōta,” you say, looking down on the grip you had on his sleeve still.
“What reason is there to know someone like this other than to activate a ticking time bomb while playing a game to pass that time? Isn’t that how it’s always been? Isn’t that what we are right now?”
Your senses tell you that something deeper beyond this surface argument has been troubling him. You slowly let go of his sleeve, before turning away with a sigh, leaving Kise absolutely confused.
“I think we both need to cool our heads,” you sigh. “We’ve both said too much, and… just… forget what I said, okay? And I’ll forget about what you told me.” Kise’s eyes widen at your statement.
“(y/n)-cchi…?”
“We can still do light-hearted banter like we always do the next time we see each other, okay Kise?” Your fists on your sides tremble before you hold up your head to give him a cheerful smile that’s eerily all too familiar to his own. You turn to walk away, but his heart squeezes painfully at the sight of your back to him like this. You’re so far from him. So far.
“Hold it, now…” he says, slightly sprinting to catch up to you. He grabs your hand, still balled tightly by your side. “You’re cruel, you know that? Demanding me not to leave but then leaving the conversation on your own accord? You’re a hypocrite.” He spins you around to see your eyes barely struggling to hold back fresh tears. Little did he know that your countenance was a mirror to his own.
“... Our heads aren’t in the right place, Kise. You should probably let go.”
“I probably should, huh…” he says, but still giving no sign that he was actually going through with it.
“Knowing you, you’d really hold my fist until someone has to actually separate you from me.”
“And knowing you, you’d probably punch me before anyone else had the chance to do so.”
“You know me so well, hm?” you muse, a tiny curl of your lip a different world than the one you gave moments before.
“... No,” he says with a slight frown. “I don’t think I know you well enough.”
“I don’t know you enough either, Kise.”
Silence falls between the two of you, frail as thin ice, before you eventually break it.
“... You’re right, this whole friendship we have right now… it’s a time bomb. It’s bound to fail and fall apart.”
“W-Wait,” Kise slightly says in shock. “That was… I didn’t mean it like—”
“No healthy relationship of any kind would last if we keep dancing around each other like this. I wanna be honest with you for once… I… don’t wanna do this banter anymore. I don’t wanna do these flirting games. I’m kinda tired of it. Especially when you always keep me at a distance.”
“Pfft, (y/n)-cchi,” he snorts loudly, flashing his sunny smile. “I’m practically so close to you holding your hand!”
“You know exactly what I mean,” you sigh, and you avert your gaze away. “You feel so far. I just… you feel so out of reach even when I’m in the same room as you… even as of now. I just want to know where we’ll end up.”
You firmly shake his grip off you, watching his hand falling back to his side as he does nothing but stare at you. You don’t know if he’s angry, offended, or shocked, but whatever his expression was, you couldn’t tell, not when you still stared at the concrete to the side rather than at him.
“Of course I wanna be friends with you,” you continue. “But can you blame me for believing that there’s something more between us when we do romantic gestures and flirting for months on end? If we’re just going to be friends, that’s fine, but I’d prefer if you’d also stop addressing me with -cchi, just to draw a clear boundary between us.” You finally look up to see Kise, but to your own shock, he looks quite bitter.
“You say that you’re confused about what we are, but then you go prattle to everyone else that you’re my significant other when we haven’t even talked a single thing about being a serious thing. You’re so fucking confusing.”
“I… did no such thing?” Your eyes, still puffy from the tear ducts, shine in genuine bewilderment.
“You… didn’t?”
“Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me right now?”
“I… um… oh…” All he could do was to stand there completely stupefied, mouth gaping as multiple realizations suddenly hit him like bricks. He rubs his neck as he shamefully looks away.
“So tell me,” you slowly say, giving him a more bone-chilling gaze than the one he gave you. “What exactly have you been hearing in the hallways?” You both stand there in silence again as Kise struggles to think of a way to explain it without sounding completely dumb.
“Okay, look… I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have listened to the rumors so easily, especially since I despise them too, but… they were about you, and I just couldn’t help myself…” he mumbles. “I don’t know, I… the thought of you getting close to me to use me really, really hurts.”
“And you thought just cutting me off on the spot was the most reasonable decision you can think of?”
“H-Hey…! Don’t put it like that! I thought I knew you well, but when I heard what people gossiped, my mind just went somewhere, and I thought maybe I misread you at some point. If you really did have ulterior motives, cutting you off wouldn’t be as easy as that other girl. Because I… w-wait! Where are you going?!”
“Home, Kise,” you flatly say. “It’s after school after all.”
“At least hear what I have to say!” He tries to catch up with you, but you only speed walk to outpace him. “Let me explain myself!”
“Hypocrite~” you say, using Kise’s mocking voice. “I don’t recall you letting me explain myself in the beginning.”
“(y/n)-cchi, I’m sorry! I’ll pay for all the outings we’ll do this week! And um… I’ll always talk to you if something’s bothering me—don’t ignore me!”
“Didn’t I tell you not to use -cchi?” you sigh, stopping abruptly, causing Kise to accidentally bump against you. “I’ll forgive you, but we’re still only friends. I guess I’ll apologize for assuming things on my end, too.” Kise drops his head on your shoulder from behind, and you only roll your eyes in amusement at the familiar contact. “Oh dear, Kise. I didn’t think you were the type to be so clingy after a fight.”
“Okay, I’ll ‘fess up,” he says, voice muffled by your uniform blazer. “Even though we’ve always gotten along so well, there’s always been a part of me who’s been on the lookout for any possible signs that you only saw me for my reputation. While I enjoyed having you around, I had always been ready to cut you off if I saw anything suspicious, but… lately the thought of letting you go ached so much… and then I heard what the other students were talking about… how you were acting the entire time… how you somehow screwed over other people before… couldn’t really think properly after that.”
“Boo hoo,” you huff. “Do you want a kiss to make you feel better?”
“... I actually do.”
“I think our heads haven’t completely cooled down. I’m going ahead.” You were about to walk away, even though you very much enjoyed his head on your shoulder, but his arms wrap around you to stop moving any further from his side.
“You said that you wrongly assumed what we were…” he whispers. “But you’re actually right. We’ve been more than friends for a while without me really acknowledging it,” he chuckles at your groan, “I guess you really do know me well… I’m really attached to you… but it’s not fair that you’re so collected even when I’m hugging you like this.”
“Kise, you’re an idiot, do you know that?” you snort. “How are you hugging me but not noticing how fast my heart is beating?”
“H-Hey! Can you call me by my first name again? I said it without really thinking, okay? It hurts me every time you do that.” He gives the most comical pout, but you only punch the top of his head on your shoulder before walking ahead.
“I’m still mad at you. I’m going home.”
“(y/n)-cchi, w-wait! Let me walk you home, then!”
“Don’t call me that either. I’m still mad at you.”
“But aren’t we dating now? I can call you that if we’re a thing.”
“But I’m still mad. You still said all those horrible things, and that stung. You think you’re the only one hurting right now?”
“I’m really, really sorry! I’ll make it up to you, and I won’t say anything like that again, and…”
“You’re not being really convincing.”
“I know I was being immature and the one with the inflated ego, and I said things that aren’t remotely true—”
You sigh before you turn back to a panicking Kise behind you.
“Then you better make it up to me by cuddling me and telling me some sweet nothings, because I can really use that right now, Ryōta.”
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justcourttee · 3 years
Note
New prompt idea! Following the defeat of Hawkmoth, Jason is terrified of the idea of Bruce adopting the sunshine child that is Adrien (that and all the puns that the boy makes... Adrien can't meet Dick!!!). He, alongside Damian, decide to try to get Selina to adopt a new cat instead. Unfortunately for everyone (except Adrien), Jon tags along. AdriJon for the ship and maybe Marinette being having a sibling relationship with the Wayne children?
I’m back to writing and when I saw this prompt, I was so excited. If it hasn’t been hinted at enough in some of my pieces, I adore AdriJon. I hope you like it! @elements1999
Stupid Lovestruck Jon
As Gabriel Agreste was drug from his front gates, the crowds surrounding the manor erupted in yet another round of cheers. Even with the hero’s help, the police had trouble keeping them back. Jason and Damian stood on the edge, both wearing matching grim expressions under their hoods and glasses.
“You know what this means D?”
Damian nodded solemnly, the scowl on his face deepening as Gabriel disappeared from their view.
“Father mustn't meet Agreste until we have found a suitable host family for him.”
The idea of Dick and Adrien bonding over stupid puns and forcing Jason and Damian to join in on family game nights was enough to send shivers down the two Wayne’s backs. There was no question about it, Adrien could not be allowed to be adopted.
“What do you think Selina would say if we brought her a kit?”
Damian shifted his gaze to Jason’s face, doing his best to hide his shock that Jason could come up with a coherent idea.
“I believe she would enjoy Plagg very much, Adrien though? Well, that would take some getting used to. How do you propose we get the two to meet?”
Jason’s face darkened quickly.
“It’ll be risky, but we invite them to America. After all, he’s going to need an escape from the media.”
“Perhaps Metropolis?”
The boys nodded as if that was the most logical sentence before both heads snapped up, their eyes widening at the sight of the petite hero that had landed between them. Marinette threw her arms around the boys’ shoulders, dragging them down to her own height.
“There is only room for so much sunshine at the Wayne estate. Dick has monopolized all of it and for the sake of not only you but myself as well, Adrien needs a more stable parental figure than Bruce Wayne. Not that my first choice would be Selena, but I know that she has a soft spot for orphans, no matter what she says.”
Both boys tried to wrestle their way out of her grasp, but it was nearly impossible with Tikki to help her.
“Here’s how it will go. I will go to help the police finalize anything they need for this arrest and you will trail Chat Noir until he decided to transform back. I want to be there as well, but unfortunately, the police aren’t exactly understanding when it comes to personal relationships.”
With a nod, the sound of two smacks echoed as she disappeared into the sky, the only trace of her being matching red spots on both of the Wayne’s necks.
“I really despise when she does that, no matter how much I want to be impressed.”
Jason chuckled as he nudged Damian forward, both of them slipping into the nearest building to change before anyone from the media could catch sight of the American’s on the scene of what would become known as the greatest arrest in Paris’ history.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
“You know, I caught the trail of you following me a couple of blocks back. You don’t have to stay hidden.”
Damian let out a small string of curses as he stepped out from behind the chimney and into view of the black cat.
“I hate magic.”
Adrien chuckled as he waited for Jason to step out from the other side, both boys looking a little sheepish that they had been caught.
“Did Marinette ask you to follow me? Cause that sounds like something she would do. Really, I’m fine guys. Once we started the investigation, so much more began to make sense. He wanted to disguise the fact that he was selfish, wanting just my mother for himself, no matter the consequence. Even if it meant sacrificing me..”
Damian swallowed awkwardly as he glanced between Jason and Adrien. Thanks to Dick’s persistent pestering, he had gotten slightly better at reading emotions and watching his tongue, but this was uncharted territory and as much as he hated to admit it, he had no idea what to do.
Adrien let out a shaky laugh as he stood, brushing off the imaginary dust from his suit.
“Whatever, so what is Maribug’s master plan for avoiding the press? I know she sent you here to collect me for that very reason, so what could it be?”
Jason cleared his throat as he stepped forward, his smile completely see-through as the worry shined.
“Well, how would you feel about a trip overseas? Metropolis perhaps? You’re a huge Superman fanboy, aren’t you? Well, Dami here is besties with his son and we thought it would be a grand idea for you to have a distraction. What do you say?”
Damian frowned at Jason’s choice of wording. Besties felt a little strong for the relationship that he held with Jon, perhaps tolerable coworkers was better suited?
“Okay.”
Both boys tried to hide their surprised faces. They knew he was desperate for an escape, but his response was still quick for their liking. Honestly, they thought it was going to take a bit more convincing than that.
“Let Marinette know that I’ll be on her balcony whenever she finishes up. I’m sure she has a long night ahead of her and will want to talk to me when she can and guys?” Both boys raised their eyebrows, curiosity, and worry nitpicking their expressions. “Thanks for coming to see me.”
And with that, he leaped off the roof leaving the batbrothers to wonder if Metropolis would be the best idea for the man who effectively was orphaned in one day.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
“Dami!”
Before he even had a chance to throw his hands up in defense, Jon had already tackled him in a bone-crushing hug much to his annoyance.
“I told you not to call me by that stupid nickname anymore Kent.”
With much effort, Damian shoved Jon off and into Marinette’s waiting arms.
“Aw, but Dami it’s so cute.” The muffled laughter coming from behind him was not helping.
Damian cut his eyes to where Jason and Adrien stood, both chuckling to themselves. He knew it was Jason’s idea to call up Jon to make this impromptu trip more believable for his father, but when breaking it down, Damian wasn’t completely sure that this option was much better than taking Adrien straight to Dick’s side.
“Anyways, I know I’m just the cover story so that you can meet up with Selina and all that, but do you have time to spare? I’d love to show Mari and Adrien around Metropolis! That’s your name, right? Adrien? Mari used to have so many cutouts of you-”
A smack echoed through the airport lobby as Jon found himself in a headlock courtesy of one petite heroine.
“Oh, you wanna bring that up now Jon? I don’t suppose you remember asking for a couple of my magazines for yourself huh?”
There was an undeniable shade of red emitting from under Marinette’s arm, one all three boys noted. A sputtering Jon finally managed to free himself, the red more visible as he gently pushed Marinette away.
“Hey it’s okay, it’s the cost of being a celebrity right?” Adrien reached out, his hand gently brushing Jon’s arm.
A sudden realization hit Damian as he watched his friend jump nearly 100 feet into the air, the red seemingly brighter than before. As Jon linked arms with Marinette, hurriedly leading them out of the airport, Adrien gently coaxing the two to behave, Damian gripped Jason’s jacket pulling the two of them to a stop.
“What do you want brat? We’re gonna get left behind-” With one killer glare, Jason slowly quieted, curiosity seeping into his expression.
“Jason, is uh- does Jonathon- does he see guys as viable mates?”
There was a slight pause and for a moment, Damian felt a bit relieved that perhaps he was not the only one to fail to notice such a thing about the Kent boy. But the moment ended abruptly as Jason erupted in laughter, drawing the attention from some passing by.
“What is it you buffoon? People are staring at us, silence yourself, and answer me.”
“Me buffoon? No, no, no” Jason’s laughter slowly ceased, but the shit-eating grin that replaced it did nothing to ease Damian’s nerves. “You see, you are the only idiot here. What is Jon? An animal? His mating preference?”
Damian felt his face heating up as his grip tightened on Jason’s jacket, intent on tearing a small hole in his precious belonging.
“Now Damian, I know you are dense, but Jon has always talked about guys with you. Did you just think they were all besties? That your third-wheeling on his dates where they gave each other like pecks on the cheek or held hands was just because you hate physical contact and his other friends didn’t mind it?”
The more Jason talked, the redder Damian felt his face becoming. Sure he had noticed before, but it never felt like it was something that mattered much. Plus, it wasn’t like Jon had mentioned anything to him about coming along on his supposed dates. How was he supposed to know?
Letting go of Jason’s jacket, Damian huffed after his friends, ignoring his brother’s taunting calls. There was only one thought that was still left on his mind.
If Jon had a crush on Adrien Agreste, this could ruin the whole plan.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
He was right.
What was implied to be a one day tour ended with them staying a week in Metropolis. And the worst part? Damian was completely powerless to do anything about it.
“Hey enfant démon, you seen my partner or yours for that matter?”
Damian scowled at Marinette as she leaned against his doorframe, her expression as exasperated as he felt.
“I told you to quit calling me that. Just because it’s in French doesn’t make it better heathen.”
Marinette stuck her tongue out at him, remaining firm in her spot as she waited for her answer. With a great sigh, Damian shook his head, glancing from his book to out the hotel window.
“They snuck out sometime early this morning while I was on my run. Jason was supposed to be keeping an eye on them.”
A slight protest echoed through the suite as Marinette shook her head.
“Do you think we’ll ever get Adrien to meet Selina at this rate? I know he needed this break, but I hadn’t expected to be gone this long. I just turned 17, if it wasn’t for Jason here being a technical adult, my parents would have never let me come. I’m honestly surprised that they haven’t shown up to drag me to Paris.”
Damian nodded slightly, his thoughts straying to the idea of an angry Sabine showing up at their hotel. The thought alone was enough to send a shiver down his spine. He opened his mouth, unsure how to respond when he caught the sound of a set of familiar giggles outside the suites’ door.
“We’re home! Marinette! You won’t believe how awesome the sunrise in Metropolis is when you’re so high up. Jon is awesome!”
The boy tried his best to hide his blush as he gently swatted Adrien’s shoulder, earning a giggle from the blonde.
“Okay lovebirds, how about you stop running off without the rest of us? At least tell us where you’re going, is that too much to ask?”
A simultaneous ‘yes mom’ came from the duo as they ducked out of Marinette’s reach, racing down the hallway.
“That’s it, I’m calling Selena right now. Damian, Jason, between the two of you, figure out a way to keep our rebellious teens in check. It shouldn’t take longer than thirty minutes for her to arrive, I’m sure the two of you can manage.”
Jason peeked his head into Damian’s room, his eyebrows raised matching how Damian felt. Did she have any idea how hard it was to hold down a Kryptonian without using Kryptonite? If only she hadn’t banned Damian from bringing it to Metropolis.
With a small huff of annoyance, Damian swung his legs off his bed, placing his book back on the nightstand carefully. This was going to be the longest thirty minutes of his life.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
“Dammit children, can’t you sit still for one minute!” Jason gripped both boy's collars as he tossed them back onto the couch that they had escaped from.
“Aw, c’mon Jason. I thought you were the fun Wayne! I just want to show Adrien a good time before he had to leave.”
Damian wasn’t sure how much more Jason could take. The vein on his forehead looked like it was about to burst from him resisting beating the two to a pulp. It was honestly a bit satisfying to look at.
“Can you at least explain why we’re on house arrest? The day has just started and we’re already wasting it.”
“I told you already Agreste, Marinette wants you to meet a friend of hers that lives nearby. We can’t have you skipping out before she gets here.”
Adrien sighed dramatically before falling into Jon’s shoulder.
“But waiting is boring!”
Damian felt his nose twitch while staring at the blonde. Honestly, he didn’t know how Marinette was able to keep up with this child-like energy for all the years she had. He was exhausted after a mere thirty minutes.
The sound of the doorknob rattling caught the attention of the four as a collective sigh of relief echoed through the room.
“Well hello there my kittens, long time no see.” Within a split second, Selina was already on top of Damian, pulling him into the biggest hug she could manage.
“Release me you heathen, I do not like being touched!”
Selina giggled as she tightened her hug before releasing him, allowing him to drop to the floor.
“Oh, I know. I enjoy giving you a hard time the most Damiboo.”
Damian cringed at the nickname as he allowed Marinette to help him back to his feet. While Selina was unbearable, he honestly had to applaud Jason for his thought. If anyone could reign in the energy Adrien had, it would be her.
“You must be Adrien. I’m Selina Kyle, so very nice to meet you.”
Adrien swallowed hard as he tentatively reached out his hand to shake hers. No one could blame him, the look on Selina’s face was terrifying as if she was admiring a jewel before shattering it into pieces.
“Now let’s cut to the chase. Do you want to live with me? You obviously need a parent figure in your life, but you also only have a year left until you can be on your own. I know it’s a big change from Paris, but between Zeta tubes and that little horse your friend Marinette carries, you’ll never be too far.”
Damian bit his lip hard, trying not to yell at Selina for her brashness. She was supposed to be gentle and coaxing. Get him to like her, spend the day with him, and then suggest it. Adrien looked as white as a ghost, as expected when someone you’ve only heard stories about shows up in your hotel room with adoption papers.
“Uhm, I don’t really want a guardian. My aunt said she would rent me an apartment wherever I wanted and when the time came for my 18th birthday, she’d sign it over to me-”
Adrien was cut off as Selina placed a finger over his lips, shocking him into silence.
“Honey, I can do that for you. Don’t rely on family who will want to steal your father’s fortune. However, I will have a few conditions.”
Adrien nodded slowly, his eyes glancing around frantically as if asking for help.
“First, you must visit Wayne Manor once a week for a family dinner, I refuse to let you off the hook with no real resemblance of a family. Second, you must rent here in Metropolis where you already have a good person looking out for you. And third, you must force Damian and Jason to participate in these once a week dinners.”
Jason and Damian shouted frantically for him to decline, their plans falling to pieces before them. They only quieted down after Marinette reached back giving them matching red bumps on their foreheads.
“What do you say, sweetie? I can tell you and Jon are already close and I think this would be best for everyone. You had already finished your studies in France so you can take this year to decide what you want to do next in life and I think between the Kents and us, we can help you with that.”
It took less than a minute for Adrien to agree and for Damian and Jason to be bested by two black cats. Selina insisted on lunch to celebrate, dragging Adrien and Jon with her and out the door leaving the three exhausted crusaders behind.
“Well, technically Bruce won’t be the one adopting him.” Marinette shrugged before plopping on the couch, the other two following suit.
“Yeah, but like, we went through all this trouble to stop Dick and Adrien from meeting, and now we will be having weekly dinners with them. Marinette, you are officially forced into this agreement as well.” Jason poked at her side, a small sigh of defeat escaping from his lips.
“Stupid lovestruck Jon.” Marinette and Jason turned their attention to where Damian sat, his arms crossed in annoyance. “I bet if they hadn’t had this week to hang out, Selina wouldn’t have picked up on their stupid crushes. Why do you women always feel the need to meddle?”
The air was silent for a moment before laughter erupted from Damian’s right side. Shaking his head, he couldn’t help the small giggle that came from his own mouth. Stupid Jon, making him attend family dinners with the likes of Dick and Adrien. He was happy for him, not to be confused with the utter annoyance he felt for him at the moment as well.
As they sat there joking about their shared fate and pondering how it could’ve gone differently, one thought was constant across all three of their minds:
Who could’ve planned for stupid lovestruck Jon?
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leedosbunnyboy · 3 years
Text
Yang Hongseok; Wallace In Wonderland
Table of Contents | Chapter 1
Tumblr media
Warning(s): cursing, death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts, mention of self harm scars, pills, mentions of rape
♤•♡•◇•♧•♤•♡•◇•♧•♤•♡•◇•♧•♤•♡•
"Levantate mijo, you have to get to school."
"Mom, I'm 20. I'm going to college, not the 1st grade." I explained to my mom.
"Yeah, 20 and can't wake himself up, apurale." My mom chided as she made her exit.
I laugh at her joke and get up.
Wish those times could've lasted.
"Ma, did you take your medicine?" I asked her.
"Yes mijo." She said and showed me her pack of pills, the required daily amount missing.
"Okay, I have to go, love you." I say and peck her cheek on my way out.
Wish I could've spent more time with her.
"Where is she?!" I asked as I rushed into the hospital.
"She's in there, but..." The doctor trailed off.
"But what?!"
"The cancer has spread. We thought it would stay in her chest, but it's moved to her brain." The doctor hesitates to finish his sentence.
"She's not gonna make it." He states.
I only nod and head into her room.
"Ma...?" My voice cracked as I quietly called out for her.
"I'm sorry mijo." She sadly said.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked as I sat in the chair next to her bed.
"I didn't want to worry you." She said.
"Well now I'm even more worried." I sob to her.
"Don't cry." She weakly reaches out and wipes my tears.
"How am I supposed to not cry? How am I supposed to go on without you?" I wept.
"You'll manage. You're my son, I raised you strong." She said.
"But if you still need something to remember me, here." She handed me a small necklace with a playing card embroidered on the charm.
"What is this?" I ask her.
"A token." She simply said.
"What am I supposed to do with this?" I asked again.
"It'll help you make some new friends to take care of you." She said.
"Mom, what do you mean? You're making no sense." I tell her.
"You'll know soon-." Her sentence was cut off by a fit of coughs as sirens began to ring.
"Mom, don't go!" I cried as I knew what was happening.
Doctors ran in and two pulled me away from her.
"Sir, we're sorry." One said as we had made our way outside the room.
♤•♡•One Month Later•◇•♧
I sadly look at the charm while thinking about what she meant.
"I'll know soon my ass." I say and throw it af the wall.
The only thing that accomplished was add more mess to my disheveled apartment.
Packs of ramen and mazapan litter my floor.
Along with the wrappers, a bottle of pills stands out to me.
"Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea." I think.
I stand up and grab the bottle.
I open the cap and pop a few into my hand.
"Don't hesitate. Don't think about yourself you selfish bitch. Don't you wanna see mom?" A small voice says in my head.
I sigh and return the pills to their container.
I think back to what she had told me; "You'll manage. You're my son, I raised you strong."
I head to my kitchen and decide to finally eat for once.
I roll up my sleeves and I'm meet with dozens of cuts decorating my arms.
I put it off and start boiling water for the ramen.
Once I'm done, I add the ramen and just sit around waiting for that to cook.
"Just take the damn pills. You know you've got nothing left to live for. You dropped out of school, cut off all your friends, and lost the last family member you had." It continued to pester me.
I ignored it to the best of my ability and turned off the stove as the ramen has finished.
I stared at the bowl of fresh noodles and began to realize how unappealing it seemed to be.
I tossed the ramen and made my way back to my room.
I picked up the bottle of pills and hurriedly opened it.
I took as many pills as my hand could fit and quickly swallowed them.
Before drowsiness could overwhelm me, I noticed the charm shining amidst the clutter of mess.
I picked it up and laid down in bed.
I smiled contentedly and let the feeling of sleep wash over me.
♤•♡•◇•♧•♤•♡•◇•♧•♤•♡•◇•♧•♤•♡•
"He's waking up!"
"Shh, you'll startle him."
"Says the giant."
I wake up to the sight of three guys looking at me curiously.
"Umm... Hi?" One says.
"Hi?" I says and begin to observe my surroundings.
Everything is brightly colored and I spot... flowers singing?
"Where the fuck am I?" I blurt out.
"What do you mean?" The tall boy asks.
"I mean, where am I. What is this place?" I rephrase.
"Wonderland; where else would you be?" The boy with blue hair answers.
"Wonderland?" I ask in shock.
"Well yeah, what kind of places have you been to?" The tall boy asks.
"No, you've got to be fucking with me." I defensively say.
"How would we be 'fucking with you'?" A short man with a top hat says.
"Wonderland isn't real. It's just some place my mom made up to tell me stories as a kid." I exclaim.
"Well, I don't know what your mom's told you, but Wonderland is real." The top hat man says.
"Say, don't you think he looks like Auntie Lupita?" The tall boy asks.
"Now that you say it, yeah." The blue haired boy says.
"How do you know Lupita?" I ask them.
"She used to visit us and take care of us when we were little." Blue haired boy says.
"How do you know Lupita?" Top hat man counters.
"She's- was my mother." I retract my original statement.
"Woah, really?!" Tall boy says.
"Come to think of it, Auntie did always tells us about her 'original world', but I always thought she was just telling tall tales." Blue boy says.
"You don't think this boy's Lupita's son from some other world?" Top hat asks.
"I mean, it would be the only logical solution. He did kinda fall from the sky." Tall boy says.
"What's your name kid?" Top hat asks.
"(M/n)." I answer.
"Well I'm Jinho." The top hat answers.
"I'm Yan An." Blue boy asks.
"And I'm Wooseok." The tall boy answers.
"I must be insane. I'm talking to the Mad Hatter, March Hare, and Dorm Mouse." I quietly exclaim.
"Who?" Wooseok asks.
"Nevermind. Do you guys know a way out of here?" I ask them.
"Sorry, but no. We don't even know how you got here." Jinho says.
"Would you like to come with us since you don't have anywhere to go?" Wooseok offers.
I stare into space conflicted.
Yes, I dont know them, and they could possibly just be rapists luring me into some trap.
But that wouldn't explain how they know mom, and I'm assuming this is what her cryptic last words meant.
"Okay." I sigh.
"Yay!" Wooseok and Yan An cheer.
"Come on (M/n)!" Yan An says and takes my hand as we make our way on a blue and pink road.
"Where are we going?" I ask.
"To Hui's house." Yan An explains.
"You'll meet him soon." Jinho says, already sensing my confusion.
I nod and we continue on our way towards this Hui's house.
"(M/n), may I ask you a question?" Wooseok asks.
"You kinda already did, but yes." I respond.
"You don't seem like the standard Korean I've met, are you foreign?" He asks.
"Kinda, my dad was Korean and my mom was Hispanic, but I've lived in Korea all my life." I explain to him.
"What's Korea like? Lupita always told us about it, but I just assumed it wasn't real." Yan An asks.
"It's like a little slice of Heaven. Does it have many flaws, yes. But I wouldn't want to live anywhere else." I tell them.
"What do you mean flaws?" Wooseok curiously asks.
"Well, as someone who's mixed, I do face alot of racism. And the fact that I'm gay doesn't really do me any favors." I tell them.
"Well you wont have to worry about that here. Everything is inclusive, and I dont think I've ever met a straight person." Yan An says.
I laugh at his last statement before my gaze lies upon a house made out of a giant mushroom.
"We're here." Jinho says.
He knocks on the door and a man holding a cigar answers.
"Jinho. Did you guys find out what that thing that fell out of the sky was?" Hui asks, colorful smoke leaving his lips.
"Yeah, it was just some kid who says he's from Auntie's world." Jinho explains.
"He also Auntie's son!" Wooseok announces.
"This kid's Lupita's son?" Hui asks.
"Apparently." Jinho sighs.
"Come in. I'll call everyone else." Hui says and invites us in.
His home is decorated with small trinkets and pastel wallpaper.
My eyes are attracted to a tea set used as a centerpiece in his kitchen.
"It's a beautiful set isn't it?" Hui asks me, obviously noticing my admiration.
"It really is." I say.
"Chamomile or Jasmine?" He offers.
"Jasmine please." I tell him, and he heads to start the brew.
He finishes quickly and comes back with a cup of tea.
"Here you go." He hands it to me.
"Hey! I want tea too!" Yan An whines.
"I only offered it to...?"
"(M/n)." I tell him.
"Only for (M/n) since he's my guest. You come here to leech off me every day." Hui scolds him.
Yan An sits and pouts.
"It's amazing." I say after I took my first sip.
"I do pride myself on my tea making." Hui smirks.
Once I finished I brought it to the sink.
"(M/n) there's no need. I could do it for you." Hui offers.
"It's fine really. My mom always told me to clean up after myself." I say and begin delicately cleaning the teacup.
A knock on the door grabs everyone's attention.
"They must be here." Jinho says and heads to open the door.
Four men step inside, each continuing to fit the the descriptions of the characters my mom told me about.
"So this is the mystery boy everyone's talking about." A man resembling the White Rabbit offers me his hand.
"The name's Kino, pleasure to meet you." He says and kisses my hand.
"Hi, I'm Yuto." A deep voiced man greets me.
"And I'm Shinwon." A rapsy voiced man greets me next.
I assumed that these two were the twins Tweedledee and Tweedledum.
"I'm Hongseok." A man with cat eyes shakes my hand.
"And you are?" The Cheshire man asks.
"I'm (M/n)." I tell him.
"So this is the guy who fell out of the sky?" Kino asks.
"Yeah, he's also Auntie's son." Jinho says.
"Wow!" Yuto and Shinwon exclaim.
"You mean he's from the 'other world' Auntie always told us about?" Hongseok asks.
I nod.
"And I'd really like to return there." I say.
"Well, lucky for you darling. I happen to know a way out." Kino says.
"Really?!" I exclaim. Feeling excited for the first time in a while.
"I hate to inform you that it won't be an easy trip though." He continues.
"I don't care. Anything to get home." I say.
"I don't mean difficult as in a tiring trip. I mean, it's possible you won't make it." Kino sadly says.
"Then I'll be willing to make that sacrifice." I boldly state.
"With that kind of determination, he's definitely Auntie's kid." Hui says
"Well come on darling, and we'll begin our journey." Kino holds his hand out for me.
I take it, and we're about to exit when..
"Where do you two think you're going... without us?" Wooseok asks.
All of them nod in agreement and stand up.
"Why are all of you so eager to help me?" I ask.
"Because your mother gave us so much, and while we never got to directly pay her back. We're gonna make sure to repay her by helping you." Yuto says.
I nod and make my way outside.
"Hold your horses kid!" Shinwon exclaims.
"Yes?" I ask.
"Calm down kid. Let us prepare and we'll start our journey tomorrow." Jinho says.
I nod in acknowledgment head back inside.
"Where will I be staying?" I ask.
"That... is a good question." Hui pauses to think.
"He can stay with me." Hongseok blurts out.
"Would you be fine with that?" Hui asks.
"As long as Hongseok is." I say.
"Alright, head to bed everyone. We'll sleep early to get a head start on our journey." Hui says, and everyone heads to their respective rooms.
"Come on." Hongseok says and grabs my hand.
We step in, and I admire the violet and magenta aesthetic of his room.
"You don't have to worry about anything. I'll take the couch." He says and begins to set up the couch.
"Thank you for this." I say.
"You don't have to thank me. I honestly see this as an obligation." Hongseok says.
"What do you mean?" I ask him.
"Although everyone else had a nice relationship with Auntie, I always distanced myself. I was always quiet as a kid, but I also didn't want to just accept her into my life so easily." He explains.
"Why not?" I question.
"After my parents had died, I was left all alone within Wonderland. I don't know what your mother told you about this place, but it's not all bright and nice. I had to survive by myself in the woods until Auntie found me. She brought me back here to meet everyone else, and I couldn't thank her enough for that. But I was still a lost, angry, and confused child. Now though, I realize she was the best thing to every happen in my life. So now, I'm gonna be your personal bodyguard." Hongseok says.
"Thank you." I say.
Hongseok smiles and ruffles my hair.
"Get some sleep (M/n). We'll get you home soon." He says and turns off the lights.
"Goodnight Hongseok." I say.
"Goodnight (M/n." He replies.
And with that, I look forward to getting back home.
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notmymainblog · 3 years
Text
Valentines
Sorry, this is late. I wanted to write a request before I started this one! Happy Valentine’s day. I did not, in fact, have a valentine, so I ate chocolate and stared at pictures of Sirius. Anyways, here we go!
Master list
InteractiveFics
To use:
Download obvi. Click the icon (upper right by the search bar) in the first box to enter your name. If you did it correctly, y/n should read as your actual name. Under that, it will say something along the lines of “need to change something other than y/n?” there, you can change anything you want.
y/h/c and y/h don't work together, so please enter y/ho if you're inputting your Hogwarts house
Warnings: swearing? fluff lol <3 Relatively short, I’m sorry, guys 💔 
     Sirius, for perhaps the first time in his life, didn’t have anyone to be with on Valentine’s day. His plans with Marlene fell through when her best friend kissed her. To be fair, they were adorable, braiding each other’s hair, doing makeup together. How could you be mad?
     So instead of going to Hogsmeade, he was slumped in the common room. Coincidentally you didn’t have plans either. Almost every guy in Hogwarts, as well as some girls, asked you out. Flowers and chocolates were piled in your room. You always politely rejected them. There weren’t any hard feelings or anything.
     Because coincidentally, the only person you wanted to spend Valentine’s with was always busy. Except for today. You walked down the stairs, smiling after getting a heartfelt love letter. 
     “Hey Sirius, date running late?” you asked with a pang of jealousy.
     “Don’t have one,” he said.
     “Excuse me, did I hear that right? The Sirius Black doesn’t have a date?” you said.
     “no need to rub it in y/n,” he said, getting up.
    You grabbed his arm, “I didn’t mean it like that!” you apologized, “and it’s your lucky day because I don’t have a date either. Because I’m the nicest y/ho student in the entire school, I will take pity upon you my dear friend and let you take me to Hogsmeade.” you grinned.      
     He sighed, wrapping an arm around you, “why the fuck not, be ready in ten y/n,” 
     And so, ten minutes later, you stood in the common room looking very, very, beautiful. Did they whisper about you? Yes, but you knew for a fact it was full of admiration. 
     “Hey y/n, ready to go?” Sirius said, placing a hand on your shoulder.
     “Yeah, let’s go,” you said.
     A Gryffindor boy piped up, “wait y/n are you and Sirius-”
     “Great friends? Yes, we are,” you interrupted before pulling him along. 
     The walk to Hogsmeade felt long. Sirius barely spoke. You stopped walking, looking at him.
      “Are you really that sad about Mar?” you asked with another pang of jealousy.
     “no, no, I’m just, I guess,” he looked down, “I’m used to being wanted, and it’s not her in particular, but it just makes me feel like shit,” he finished.
    You pulled him into a hug, “It’s ok Siri, you’ve got a million valentine's days to spend with someone you really love,” saying that to him physically pained you, but you wanted him to feel better.
     He smiled tightly, “yeah, you’re right, I guess,”
     And so you two walked to the three broomsticks, you managed to cheer him up quite a bit while you were eating and drinking. Walking out and seeing the happy couples put you back a couple of steps.
    “Zonkos?” you asked, grabbing his arm.
     He nodded and started walking towards the shop. After Sirius bought prank supplies, he led you towards the shrieking shack. You both leaned against the fence.
     “Sorry, I’ve been so fucking sad all day,” he said.
     “It’s alright,” you assured, “why didn’t you just get another date? I’m sure you could’ve found one,”
     “I was, um, waiting for someone else to ask me,” he confessed.
     “hm? Did they?” you said before mentally slapping yourself.
     If they had asked him, he wouldn’t be here with you.
     “Yeah, but I knew they didn’t feel the same,” he said.
     That left you confused, but you didn’t press further. The walk back to the castle was considerably shorter. 
     “Well, I’ll see you around, Siri,” you said, “I had a lot of fun,”
     “I had a lot of fun too y/n and um I-” the words got caught in his throat.
     “You...?” you urged him.
     “Um, I was wondering if you had done the potions homework?” he said, gritting his teeth.
     “There wasn’t any,” you laughed, ruffling his hair, “and even if I did, I'm not giving you the answers, I’d probably fail you. I suck at potions. I’ll see you around,” you said.
     Sirius dragged himself back to the common room.
     ‘That was stupid, that was really stupid. I’m really fucking stupid. I can’t believe this I-’ Sirius’ thoughts were interrupted by colliding with someone.
     “Oh um s-sorry Adrian,” he muttered, “hot date tonight?”
     “Hopefully, I’m finally asking out y/n!” he grinned.
     “What? You can’t,” he stuttered
     “Why?” Adrian asked, “Is she seeing someone?”
     “Yeah,” he said without thinking.
     Adrian frowned, “who?”
     Sirius gulped, “m-me,”
     All of Adrian’s annoyance disappeared.
     He patted Sirius on the back, “shit, congrats, man. Treat her right, yeah?” he walked away.
     “Oi! Sarah, be my valentine?” he yelled at the brunette.
     Her laugh was followed by an enthusiastic, “Yes!”
     “All bark no bite, huh pads?” James said from behind him.
     “I’m just...what if she says no?” he sighs.
     “Put it behind you and keep being her friend,” he shrugged.
     Sirius groaned in frustration, “I don’t want to be her friend! I want her,” 
     “You’ve got it, bad mate, just tell her, or you’ll be stuck at her wedding in the front row. I mean, god forbid she falls for Snivellus, ooh! Or Remus, that would be fucking painful, huh? Or Reg-”
     “I get it! I get it, James! I’ll go to her fucking dorm and ruin our friendship,” he mumbled.
     “Hey, maybe she’ll let you shag her!” he shouted. 
     A faint “shut up, James,” could be heard from down the hall.
     He walked to the y/ho common room and up to the dorms. He knocked at your door.
     “Sirius Black knocking before he enters my dorm? What a surprise!” you grinned. 
    He laughed softly, “y/n you’ve got a little chocolate right there. No, no, right there not...” 
     You managed to wipe your mouth, not touching the chocolate on the left corner once.
     He wiped it away and grinned, “what would you do without me,”
     “Get yelled at a lot less for talking in class,” you said.
     His stomach turned, “I um have to ask you something,”
     His heart beat faster, and he felt butterflies in his chest and stomach. His face felt hot.
     “I-I know Valentine’s day is almost over, but I want you to be my Valentine...I want you y/n. All to myself, I’m so fucking selfish when it comes to you. So please, please, give me a chance,” he said, “and I know you're probably thinking I’m only doing this because I’m lonely, but I’ve liked you since like the second year, I just didn’t want to ruin things.”
     He laughed softly “and then James told me if I didn’t ask you out marrying Snape, Remus, or my brother were possibilities,”
     “Excuse me marrying who?” you interrupted.
     “Um, not the point,” he said, shaking his head, ”the point is that um, it’s just that...” he took a deep breath, “the point is that I wanna fucking kiss you. And never kiss anyone else again.”
     “Well, what’s stopping you,” you said, leaning towards him.
     His hand ghosted over your cheek, resting closer to your y/h/c hair. His breathing was shallow, and he bit his lip before closing his eyes and pressing his lips to yours, barely touching them and pulling back quickly.
     “Are you sure this is ok? I mean, if it’s not, you can tell me y/n,”
     You laughed softly. It was music to Sirius’ ears, “it’s fine, but I know you can kiss better than that sweetness,”
     He grinned and stepped closer to you, pushing his lips against yours. Both of your lips were chapped from the cold, and you let out a soft sigh before he pulled away.
    “no, more,” you whispered, pulling him in again.
     You stayed like that for a minute or two, kissing while he was halfway out the door for everyone to see.
     “sleepover,” you said, hugging him.
     “Woah um y/n I don’t think, that's moving kind fast don’t you think?” he said.
     “Not like that, silly,” you giggled, “my dorm is really cold tonight, and you’re hot, so it only makes sense for you to be chivalrous and hold me all night to keep me warm,”
     “Well, how could I refuse?” he chuckled.
     You pulled him into your dorm and to the bed. You moved under the covers, and he followed, wrapping his arms around you. You felt his breath on the back of your neck and turned to face him. You pressed a soft kiss to his lips. When you pulled away, he pulled you back in, pressing a firm kiss to your lips.
     His thumb stroked your cheek, “mine?” he whispered.
     “Yours,” you smiled.
     He pulled you closer, “good. You better be,”
     And so, it began, late nights, getting into the habit of calling Minerva Minnie, a lot of detention, a lot more talking in class. And so it continued, graduating together, mean looks from Walburga, getting along with Regulus, sitting at Lily and James’ wedding, catching the bouquet, a beautiful ring, a small crying boy named Harry Potter.
     And a beautiful white dress, a cottage by the lake, seeing Harry off to Hogwarts, getting older, watching Harry graduate, going to the engagement party, watching the wedding, meeting the kids, and being reminded of how thankful you were for Sirius Black who was with you until the very end, and beyond.
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thefloorisbalaclava · 4 years
Text
ludus [pre-pragma]
ludus - playful love
pairing: frankie ‘catfish’ morales x f!reader
warnings: none
a/n: so in my mind frankie is 40-ish in triple frontier and in pragma so each of these little one shots will be either fifteen, ten, or five years prior to the events in pragma/the movie. most of them will also be from frankie’s pov.
summary: frankie hates parties so he’ll find any reason to get away from one and in this case the reason is you.
pragma masterlist
FIFTEEN YEARS AGO
Frankie stood in the corner of the room, away from all the riff raff of the party going on around him. Santiago dragged him along although he had said no about twenty times. He kept telling him that this would be their last party with people they knew for a long time, but what finally convinced him? She was going to be there—the girl he’d been crazy about since high school. She wasn’t one for parties either if he remembered correctly. Even on the night of the senior prom he found her outside looking up at the stars instead of sneaking drinks and dancing with everyone else.
He loved her then. Hell, he had loved her forever.
He took a sip of the beer he’d been nursing as Santiago walked over to him.
“You just gonna stand here all night, hermano?” Santiago asked, standing beside him and nudging him.
“Yup.” Frankie took another sip of beer. “Told you I didn’t wanna come.”
“You’ll feel better once your girl shows up, I bet.”
“She’s not…my girl.” Frankie could feel himself getting hot under the collar. She would be if he had the guts to confess.
“She could be. I keep telling you what you have to do.” Santiago waved at a woman that walked by then looked over at the door. “Ah, there she is.” Frankie immediately stood up straighter and wondered if his outfit was okay. Santiago called her over and she floated over with a beaming smile.
“Hey boys! I’m so happy to see some familiar faces.” She hugged Santiago then Frankie. He awkwardly patted her back, trying not to make it obvious that he turned into a mess around her.
“Good to see you. Beer?” Santiago offered and she nodded. He went off to get a beer, leaving her and Frankie alone.
“How you been, Francisco? You’re looking good.”
He silently thanked God that he decided to wear what he was wearing tonight. “Thanks. You too. You look…nice,” he said awkwardly.
“Aww Frankie, you’re such a sweetheart. Thank you.”
“Uh…you wanna—” he started.
“A beer for the lady,” Santiago said, handing her a bottle.
“Thanks Tiago.” She giggled when he made a face at the nickname.
“I’m gonna leave you crazy kids to it. I…got a few things to take care of.” Santiago lifted his bottle of beer towards them before walking off.
She leaned in closer to Frankie. “I hate it here.”
“Yeah, me too. Wanna get outta here?” he asked.
“Please.” She put her beer on a window ledge and headed for the door with Frankie not far behind. “Ahhh, that’s better. I can hear myself think out here.”
“Yeah.”
“So…are we going for a drive or just hanging out here?” She tugged on the bill of his cap—something that he had come to love.
“Whatever you want,” he said, shrugging.
“Let’s go for a drive.” She got into his truck.
“You got it.” He got in and started the car, looking over at her only to get caught.
“You’re always looking at me like that, Francisco.” She grabbed his face and laughed.
“Sorry.” He was happy for the darkness inside the truck because she couldn’t see him blushing.
“Don’t be sorry. I like when you look at me.” She let go of his face and he started to drive. He had no idea where they were going but he was just happy to be with her.
“I like when you look at me too,” he said after some time.
“You’re fun to look at.”
“I…am?” he asked.
“Yup. And I like being around you,” she said. “You make me feel…safe. Safe and calm.”
“You make me feel seen. That probably sounds stupid but…”
“It’s not stupid, Frankie. I get it.” He turned in the direction of the lake and she sat up straight. “The lake?”
“Yeah. That okay?” he asked and she nodded happily. As soon as he parked the car, she hopped out and ran to the edge of the water. The sun hadn’t fully set yet but the moon was already bold in the sky.
“I love it here.” She pointed across the lake. “I’m gonna have a house right on the other side of the lake. I’ll be able to walk a few feet from my house and be at the lake.”
“Oh really?” Frankie stood beside her.
“Yup. And I’ll invite you and Santiago. We’ll have barbecues and go on hikes. Everything!” She was so animated and Frankie fell even more in love. “Do you think the water is cold?”
“Hm…I dunno, why?” She looked at him then kicked off her shoes. He watched her, confused, until she began taking other articles of clothing off. “Whoa…what the hell are you doing?” Frankie turned away quickly.
“Going for a swim.” She stepped closer, letting the small waves lap at her feet. “You can look. It’s not like I’m naked.”
Frankie hesitated more for his sake than hers. He could barely handle looking at her fully dressed and knowing that she had even less on already had him feeling things he’d be embarrassed to talk about even at his age. When he finally looked, she was looking back at him. He was entranced—not by her body but by the way she looked at him. A small smile graced her lips and the setting sun seemed to make her glow, enveloping her in an ethereal light. Soon he was standing beside her in just his underwear as well, ready and willing to do anything she asked of him. The water hit his feet and he hissed.
“It’s freezing.”
“We gotta run in,” she said backing up.
“What?” He followed her.
“The quicker we get in there the faster our bodies will adjust to the temperature.” She grabbed his hand and squeezed. “Ready?” He nodded. “Count of three. One…two…three!”
And they ran as fast as their feet could carry them, shouting and gasping as the water hit them.
“Holy shit!” Frankie yelled before laughing wildly. She went under and came back up, gasping.
“Okay. It’s colder than I thought.” She laughed then floated on her back. “Francisco?”
“Yeah?”
“How much longer are you home for?” she asked. He and Santiago were planning on joining the army together and just about everyone knew by now.
“A few more weeks. Gotta finish up getting my pilot’s license. Why?” He watched as she floated then came to a stop to look at him.
“I’m…gonna miss you.” Her face fell and though the light from the sunset still shone on her, she no longer glowed. The only thing that he saw from her now was sadness.
“I’m gonna miss you too but me and Santiago will be back. And we’ll get to do some swimming and camping and whatever else you like, okay?” He moved closer to her, trying to see if he had cheered her up a little at least.
“Is it selfish to say that I don’t want you to go?”
“No. It’s nice to hear someone say that. It’s nice to hear you say it especially.”
“Can I do something?”
“Like what?” he asked as she moved even closer. They hadn’t gone out too far so they were still able to stand and have their heads above the water.
“Kiss you…maybe it’ll give you something to remember me by.”
“I’ll remember you no matter what but…okay.” Truthfully, he wanted nothing more than to kiss her and now that it was about to happen, he tried his best to keep calm. She put her arms around him and closed her eyes as she moved in for the kiss. Frankie knew he should close his eyes but he wanted to remember her face at that moment—her perfectly puckered lips, the small shy smile that played across her lips.
Then it happened and his eyes fell closed all on their own. Her fingers tickled the hair at the nape of his neck as she pressed her lips to his. It was a gentle kiss but it lingered on his lips so much so that he wanted more and luckily, she did too. This time, he kissed her and she made a beautiful sound against his lips. Her fingers tangled in his hair now and he vowed to never cut it too short if only to feel her fingers tug and play with his hair this way again. His tongue played at her lip until she let it slip into her mouth. She made another lovely sound, one that affected him in a way he prayed she couldn’t feel.
When they finally pulled away from each other, they were out of breath and both craving more.
“That was the most amazing kiss I’ve ever experienced,” she said.
“Yeah,” was the only thing Frankie could muster.
“Frankie, I…I think I…” She lowered her eyes then laughed it off. “I think we should go get dressed now.” She swam toward the shore. He lingered for a moment but soon followed.
“Are you okay?” he asked her, shivering against the air.
“Yeah, I’m okay.” She dressed quickly and walked back to his truck, seemingly avoiding eye contact.
“You wanna go home?” he asked as he walked over, pulling his shirt over his head.
“Can we just sit here for a bit?” She hugged herself.
“Here.” Frankie put the jacket he hadn’t put back on yet around her shoulders. “I thought you said I was fun to look at but you’ve been trying your best not to look at me ever since we got out of the water.”
“Frankie, I…I don’t know how to deal with how I feel right now…”
“How do you feel?”
“I’m happy. I’m sad. I’m confused.” She finally looked at him and smiled sadly. “I don’t want this night to end.”
“I don’t either.” Frankie put his hands in his pockets.
“We need to get you a new cap.”
“If you can find me a cap you think I’d wear I’ll switch this one out for it and never take it off. How’s that sound?”
“You promise?”
“Promise.”
Then she hugged him. She let out a sigh as she did. He kissed her forehead and held her. This was all he ever wanted. The feeling of her in his arms, her embrace, would stay with him forever.
“Let’s get you home.”
“Okay.” She let go and got into the truck. Once he got in and started the car, she played around with the radio. “You know, I can’t wait to get out of that shitty apartment.”
“Just keep dreaming of that big house by the lake and it’ll come true,” he said.
“I hope so.” Livin’ On A Prayer by Bon Jovi started playing on the radio and she sat back before turning to him and grinning.
“No…” He shook his head. “Not this time.”
“Tommy used to work on the docks, union’s been on strike. He’s down on his luck, it’s tough, so tough…” she sang. “Come on, Francisco!”
“Gina works the diner all day working for her man, she brings home her pay, for love, for love…” he mumbled unenthusiastically.
She sung louder now. “She says we gotta hold on to what we’ve got. It doesn’t make a difference if we make it or not. We’ve got each other and that’s a lot for love. We’ll give it a shot!”
And Frankie finally joined her for the chorus, both of them singing at the top of their lungs.
“Whoa! We’re halfway there! Whoa! Livin' on a prayer! Take my hand, we’ll make it I swear! Whoa, livin’ on a prayer!”
They laughed and sang whatever they could when they finally caught their breath. He pulled up to the front of her apartment building and turned the car off.
“Promise me we’ll hang out before you go,” she said, turning in her seat to face him.
“Of course we will. Promise me you’ll kiss me again?”
“Now or…”
“Yeah.”
She leaned over the center console and kissed him before he could say another word. He pulled her across a little more completely so that she was sitting in his lap now while her feet still rested on the passenger seat. His cap was knocked off at some point during the kiss but he didn’t care. All he felt were her hands, her body, her lips and the rest of the world faded away. They kissed each other as if this would be the last time they ever did. He craved more—so much more, but he stopped himself, pulling away to catch his breath.
“Your…your hat,” she breathed.
“Don’t care.” His forehead rested against hers. “I wanna kiss you every day for the rest of my sorry life.”
“Why can’t you?” she asked. He wasn’t sure how to answer.
No. He did actually but he couldn’t get himself to say the words. They were right on the tip of his tongue but…he couldn’t. He didn’t want to scare her away.
“What’s wrong, Frankie?”
“Nothing…and everything,” he said. She moved off his lap and sat back in the passenger seat. He was so in love with her and she didn’t even know it.
“Do you…wanna come upstairs?” she asked.
Hell yeah I do. “I can’t,” he said. “Not tonight.”
“Oh.” She sounded so disappointed, so let down, but he couldn’t do that with her yet. He couldn’t let her give herself to him fully without telling her those words that he was so afraid to say.
“I don’t want you to think I don’t want to. God knows I do, but…there’s something I gotta do first, okay?” He touched the hand she had rested on the center console.
“Okay, Frankie.”
He took her hand and kissed it then pressed it to his cheek. Say it. Just. Say. It.
“I’ll see you soon,” he said. “Don’t forget about that new hat.”
“You got it.” She smiled and got out of the truck. “See you soon.” She walked away but stopped before she went into the building to blow him a kiss. He pretended to catch it and put it in his pocket.
“I love you,” he said quietly as she turned away. “So fucking much.”
Tags: @cable-kenobi @saltywintersoldat @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @pedrosdoll @psychobillybunny @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @keeper0fthestars @mrsparknuts @thinemineours @huliabitch @synystersilenceinblacknwhite @lavenderl3mons @mrscrain-x7 @fioccodineveautunnale @gooddaykate @themilkface @tiffdawg @ms-dont-care @mus1caln0tes @awesomefandomsunited @seawhisperer @virtualxjournality @badassbaker @demigod-dragonrider-schoolidol​ @lokiaddicted @forever-rogue @sloantravels @javier-djarin @jawabear @longitud-de-onda
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autistic-shaiapouf · 3 years
Text
Very soon headed to baby's first apartment and cutting my family off as well and am just. having a lot of thoughts about identity today
Tw: vent? and mentions of implied abuse
I'm holding onto one specific thing and it does feel personal, so I guess that's why it's at the forefront of my mind but like. So I'm making those vo.caloid playlists, and I'm stacking in the miku music, and it feels like I'm having a 2nd vo.caloid phase, and it's great! The first time I really had a whole vo.caloid phase was when I was maybe. 13 or 14 or so, and I'm not gonna lie, it was a very difficult time for me, definitely when I was beginning to come to terms with how my family was treating me. This music was here during everything that happened, and it's still here in the aftermath, still unchanged. It's something I've always loved, but I know my family would never touch it, they didn't like it, my father told me, when I was 13ish, he asked "why can't you like anything normal". It's so surreal, to see it all still here and especially to have become mainstream, something I was absolutely bullied and mocked for becoming mainstream. 13 year old me would've cried in joy. I think it absolutely is a part of who I am.
I don't think I was ever really allowed to express or have much of an identity. I didn't know I had adhd until I was 17 and found out on my own, the first words out of my mouth were "oh my god, I'm not stupid", and my family would never have considered any neurodivergence, all kids are hyperactive, this is just a fake condition so bad parents parents narc up their kids! Not that there's anything more to the condition, not that it plagued me all my life and nearly ended it when I couldn't figure out what was wrong while no one bothered to help me. I stayed closeted as a trans person for 7 years bc I knew what the repercussions would be if I came out, and when I finally did that 2ish months ago, it played out exactly as I expected it to.
The most work I'd ever gotten done with my health was when I sat down and started scheduling my own appointments, with no vehicle or license and calling the insurance to see what we even had bc no one knew. My headaches went untreated for years, no one ever turned the sound of the tv down when I had my first migraine, I got c.ovid and was told I didn't, it was a false positive, had symptoms for 10 weeks and was told it was just the flu, but got vaccinated and "you already had covid, you don't need the vaccine". The anxiety and stress played and continue to play hell with my health, but those always pass, those always get better.
I just never had a place to really openly talk about myself and how I felt and who I actually am and now that I have a chance and time to finally pull it all together I just. feel overwhelmed? I alnost feel like I simultaneously do and don't know who I am. Yes the trauma stunted me psychologically and yes I've been in therapy for a few years because of this. I don't feel prepared for picking up a job and just making things work. I have the money to be able to just pay some rent for some time, but the idea of walking out of all these years and then just stepping directly into actual adulthood like nothing happened makes me. All I've ever done is mask everything and bow my head in obedience and now I feel like I'm back to doing what I did to protect myself bc being openly trans or clearly nd isn't something that's accepted everywhere. I feel like I just wanna make something of myself after all this but I just don't know what to do. I'm only 22, I have so much time and a lot of people say that they'd never wanna be in their 20s again but.
I feel like I've been left with everything and nothing. I know what I'm doing but I don't. I was never my family's priority, I was the trophy kid who got praised for achievement and any deviation from that was punished, anything abnormal like my mental health and the like went under the rug. I'm tired and jittery from nerves, wherever I end up I just wanna be happy, that's where the bar is. I also want my stuff back since I had to leave in a rush and couldn't grab everything. I'll be called a liar, selfish, every name in the book when I do go back to get my things, when I do cut my family off and let them know why I left and what I felt, and I know it isn't true but. I feel like I'm sifting through rubble and trying to piece together what's even left. I was pushed to and beyond my limits and I shattered in the process and had to rebuild myself from the ground up, and I suppose with all the upheaval that it's still a work in progress. The stress and anxiety was all manageable until it started having physical effects on me and now it's starting to click as to how bad it was and for how long I kept it up, and now that it's no longer serving a purpose, it comes and goes in waves.
I feel like I'm trying to reclaim something I never even had to begin with. I was whatever my family wanted me to be, and now that I've gotten up and left, I feel like I'm still testing waters. I feel like I don't know how to put myself and my feelings first, since that was never an option before, even while getting to my current location, of the people who'd driven me asked how I felt about making the trip and I said that if he was okay with it then it would be fine and he immediately spun it back on me, I didn't answer, I didn't say how I felt about it, even the family I'm with now noting that I don't seem very assertive, I just. have so much work to do but feel like I don't have the time to be able to do it all before I have to pretend I'm put together enough. I don't know. I feel like I do. I want to be a cheerful person, cynicism doesn't mean maturity and all that, but there's still the terror of the joy meaning that I'm ignoring something important or that I should be focusing on something that needs work, though i suppose not feeling like I can be happy is just another mark of trauma. I'm just upset and angry and every second chance I gave my family was another knife they stuck in my back, I only have like 1/3 of my belongings that I want, my family only ever cared about control to the point of paranoia, the latter of which was also handed to me. I just.
I just want this to be over
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whump-mania · 3 years
Text
I Will Survive
Something a little different from what I usually write! This is a songfic inspired by “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor. I made some new characters for this one, not sure if I’ll ever use them anywhere else. Enjoy! (This is a long one)
TW: domestic abuse, implied noncon attempt, dubcon, nonconsensual kissing/touching, cursing, gaslighting, use of slurs (sl*t)
~
The crowd was silent. All eyes on him. A bright, burning spotlight shining down on him. Everyone was waiting in quiet anticipation for the first note. Tyler steadied his breathing and focused on the sheet music in front of him. His fingers rested lightly on the keys of first chord of the song. A breath. A glance into the crowd. Alex was there, smiling at him. A surge of confidence flowed through Tyler as he turned back to the piano. 
He struck the first chord, which sent him into a flurry of notes arpeggiating up to the end of the intro. A nod to his bandmates sent him into the first verse of the song.
“At first I was afraid, I was petrified...Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side...”
~
“N-No, I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean it, I love y-”
“Shut the FUCK up, Tyler!” Eric was filled with rage. He had just pushed his boyfriend down onto the ground of the kitchen, Tyler’s now broken phone on the hard tile next to him.
It was all started by a text. A text that Tyler sent to his new friend, Alex. A bartender at the bar they performed at with their jazz band. He had been so kind to Tyler, coming up to him after the performance and telling him he had never heard someone play the piano as well as him. Eric was putting his trumpet away when he noticed the two talking, and he kept a wary eye on the bartender since then.
Tyler was just saying hello. He was just asking him if he wanted to meet up for coffee. As friends. That's when Eric found the texts messages and lost it, accusing Tyler of cheating on him.
“You’re fucking him, aren’t you?” Eric accused. “You think I’m not good enough for you, huh?!” 
Tyler shook his head rapidly. “No! No, please, I was just being friendly, I-”
“I don’t think I can be with you if you’re gonna be a slut,” Eric spat. “Have fun with your new boytoy.” Eric turned and left Tyler on the floor, taking his own things and heading for the door. 
“Wait! E-Eric, please!” Tyler scrambled off the floor and grabbed Eric’s arm. “I’ll do anything, please, d-don’t leave me...I love you...” 
Eric glared at him, not even needing to think about his next move. Everything was going according to plan. “Would you block him? Would you never speak to him again?” His voice dropped to a lower, vulnerable tone. 
Tyler nodded immediately. “Yes, yes, I promise, I won't even think about him, just please don’t leave...I-I’m sorry...” Tyler fell to his knees and sobbed. 
Eric grabbed Tyler’s broken phone from the floor, handing it to the sobbing form on the tile. Tyler took it instantly and deleted Alex’s contact with shaking hands. Eric smiled and embraced him.
“Good boy...I love you so much, Ty.” He stroked his boyfriend’s hair, calming his sobs. “Shh, I’m here.” Tyler melted, falling in love all over again.
~
Tyler’s eyes shut closed as he sang the next lyric.
“But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong, and I grew strong...and I learned how to get along...”
~
“He’s using you, you know.” Alex frowned at the man in front of him. 
Tyler and Alex were at the bar. Alex was working and Tyler had just finished his set. This was the only time they could see each other without Eric knowing: Eric was sick at home with the flu, and couldn’t perform in the gig. Tyler sipped his drink nervously.
“Maybe he is. Maybe he doesn’t even love me.” He took a shaky breath. “But I think I still love him, you know? And he’s my lead trumpet, and the band can’t survive without him...I-I can’t just...leave.”
Alex became more upset, but held it in so he wouldn’t upset Tyler. “I know it’s hard to leave a relationship like that.” He reached over and held his hand. “But I’m here to help you. I can stay with you the whole time, so he can’t hurt you.”
Tyler looked into Alex’s eyes. He couldn’t help but be reassured by the concerned, caring look in those brown eyes. A look he barely saw from Eric anymore, a look he had to work for. Tyler furrowed his eyebrows and nodded.
“Okay.”
~
“...And so you're back!”
Tyler tapped his foot, feeling a new rush of confidence as the rest of his band struck up and the lights shone on all of them.
“From outer space...I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face. I should have changed that stupid lock, I should have made you leave your key, if I'd known for just one second you'd be back to bother me...”
He pounded the keys of the piano, not even needing to look at the sheet music. He knew exactly what he was supposed to say.
“Go on now, go! Walk out the door! Just turn around now, 'cause you're not welcome anymore...Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye? You think I'd crumble? You think I'd lay down and die?”
~
“Welcome home, Ty.”
Tyler stood, dumbfounded, in the entrance to his house. Standing there, in his own home, was Eric. Someone he thought he had finally gotten rid of. Tyler closed the door behind him. 
“W...What are you doing here? How did you-”
Eric smirked and held up the house key, the one he forgot to take from him before he told him to leave.
“I couldn’t just leave you here all alone with him. I had to come take you back...after all, he did take you from me.” Eric stepped forward.
Tyler’s eyes widened and he backed himself against the door. “W-We broke up! We had a talk, you...you agreed and everything!” Tyler’s eyes threatened to shed tears. “I thought everything was okay!”
Eric laughed. “Wow, Ty, I knew he made you a slut but I didn’t know he made you a dumbass, too!” He strode forward and pressed Tyler against the door. Tyler tried to struggle away.
“No! N-No, you can’t call me that anymore, I don’t belong to anyone!” He tried to worm his way out of Eric’s grasp, but he was locked in place.
“God, he really brainwashed you, didn't he?” Eric frowned and stroked Tyler’s hair. “You can't really believe that bullshit.” He grinned and leaned in to kiss him.
“No! Stop it, g-get away from me!” Tyler wasn’t strong enough to escape the kiss. It was aggressive, and passionate, and it brought him back. Back to the fear, to the shame, to never being good enough. Eric’s hand slithering down to his waistband sent Tyler into panic mode, screaming and pushing Eric away with all his might.
Eric snapped out of his trance of lust and glowered at Tyler. His mood changed entirely as he snarled and rushed toward Tyler, ready to fight. He lunged at him and Tyler was able to dodge him, using the opportunity to push Eric to the ground. 
Tyler took the opportunity to run to the kitchen, grabbing a rolling pin and holding it at Eric, panting.
“Get. Out.” His hands were shaking as he looked at Eric with all the rage that had been built up over his months of recovery. Eric stared in bewilderment at Tyler before stumbling up and running out the door. 
Tyler dropped to his knees. He didn’t know it would be so easy. It was almost too easy...but that didn’t matter. He was gone.
~
“Oh no, not I, I will survive! Oh, as long as I know how to love, I know I'll stay alive...I've got all my life to live, and I've got all my love to give, and I'll survive... I will survive...hey, hey!”
Tyler belted and stood up from the piano seat, feeling stronger than he ever had before. Alex was in the crowd, beaming at how much he had grown. He cheered as Tyler continued.
“It took all the strength I had not to fall apart...kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart. And I spent oh-so many nights just feeling sorry for myself, I used to cry...but now I hold my head up high!”
~
“Tyler, stop! Don’t say things like that!”
“But it’s true! I-I’m disgusting, I need to go back to him, I’m being unfair...”
Tyler was sitting on his own couch, Alex by his side. He had just broken up with Eric yesterday and it was the hardest thing he had ever done. It was only possible with Alex by his side, and to his surprise, Eric left with barely any argument. 
Now, however, he regretted it all. Everything Eric said to him in the past was coming back to him, grabbing him and dragging him back to Eric’s arms. And Alex was doing his best to keep him at bay.
“Tyler, you don't owe him anything. You did the right thing, he was horrible to you, please understand that.” He looked at Tyler in the eyes, pleading. “You are not disgusting. You’re brave, and you’re beautiful, and he never deserved you.”
Tyler shook his head. “No, y-you’re lying, I’m a slut, I’m using you, I-I’m a dirty cheater, I need to go back...”
“Tyler. Look at me.” Tyler shuddered and looked at him with bloodshot eyes. Alex sighed. “I don’t want to force you into anything. But I will say this. I’ve seen the way he treats you, and it isn’t okay. You are the bravest person I know for leaving him, and I know you can recover. I...I love you, Tyler. I have for a while and I hate seeing you upset. So...I wanna see you happy.”  Alex teared up as well, quickly wiping his eyes.
Tyler stared in shock, not knowing what to say. So he didn’t say anything. He leaned forward and kissed Alex, most likely soaking his face with his tears. Alex embraced him and kissed him back. This was a start, but they still had a long way to go.
~
“And you see me, somebody new, I'm not that chained-up little person still in love with you...”
~
“Uh...Eric, I dunno how safe I feel doing this...” Tyler tugged at the restraints that kept him tied to Eric’s headboard. Eric gave him a dangerous look.
“Tyler, you promised me. You’re really gonna do this to me on my birthday?” Eric raised an eyebrow, securing the knots.
“N-No, I-”
“You’re really gonna be that selfish? After all the things I’ve done for you? Remember all the stuff I gave you for your birthday? Does that mean nothing to you?” Eric feigned a hurt expression.
“Eric, no, I...” Tyler swallowed. “I’m okay. We can do this, I’m sorry for upsetting you.” Tyler smiled at him, but it was forced. He really, really didn’t want to do this, but he was afraid that it would be even worse if he kept complaining. He felt trapped, he felt chained up and restrained: in a literal and figurative sense. 
Eric smiled down at him, giving Tyler that approving, loving gaze he so yearned for. “Thank you, Ty. I love you.”
“I love you too.” The response was automatic. It was the only thing keeping him going.
~
“And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free...”
Tyler smiled and looked to Alex in the crowd.
“Well, now I'm saving all my lovin' for someone who's loving me!”
Alex laughed, blushing and clapping along with the song as Tyler went through the chorus once again. 
“Go on now, go! Walk out the door! Just turn around now, 'cause you're not welcome anymore...Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye? You think I'd crumble? You think I'd lay down and die? Oh no, not I, I will survive! Oh, as long as I know how to love, I know I'll stay alive...I've got all my life to live, and I've got all my love to give, and I'll survive... I will survive...I will survive!”
The crowd cheered loudly. Alex stood up, tears in his eyes. He was filled with pride watching Tyler, his boyfriend (that still felt good to say), performing on stage like this. 
Tyler’s fingers danced across the piano as he ended the song, the crowd erupting in applause when the song was over. Tyler rushed offstage and into the crowd to embrace Alex. 
He was brave. He was beautiful. And Eric never, never deserved him. 
He will survive.
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xxisxxisxxis · 4 years
Text
Shining Star | Part Three
Words: 3k
Warning(s): explicit language, sexual situations
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"Hello?" I answer the phone with a yawn. 
"You just, like, left?" Nikki says from the other end. 
"Don't say it like I knocked you up and left without a trace. I left you coffee, a pop tart and a thank you note." I shrug. "And how'd you get my number?" 
"Tommy. So that's it? No relationship talk or anything?"
"N-No?" I furrow my brows a little. 
"Really?"
"I mean, if you wanna date, sure. I guess."
"No, no, that's not what I meant...it's just, chicks usually get attached and stuff and cling." He explains. "So when I woke up and you were gone without me asking you to leave, I don't know. I just wasn't expecting it."
"Oh, well, you're welcome. I guess."
"But, if you wanna do it again sometime—"
"—I don't sleep with the same people twice unless we're in a relationship." I inform him.
"Worth a shot." 
"Tansy, who's that?!" My mom calls from the living room. 
"I gotta go but I'll see ya later." I tell him. 
"Bring your friend. I need someone to shit on." He replies and I roll my eyes. 
"You need to be careful. Viv doesn't put up with bullshit for long." 
"Yeah, yeah, see ya later." 
"Later." 
Me two years before then would've had a steel grip on his leg, refusing to let go. 
I kind of had to train myself to accept that sex doesn't automatically equal anything more than just sex. After Vince got Tami pregnant, and slept with my mother—tell you about it in a moment—I had major issues with the perception of monogamous relationships, and to avoid being hurt again without being able to control it, I decided if I was going to be fucked over, I was gonna at least get to control who fucked me over. So I began building up my tolerance for sleeping with guys without getting attached, or at least tried. I'd still wipe a few tears on my way home if I truly liked the guy and realized he was just using me for sex, but never calling them back or acknowledging them as little as possible always helped a little.
That's all I'd seen, though. My dad always avoided my mom, my mom always dodged my dad like a bullet, even when they lived in the same house. They were never really in love—my mom was a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader and got pregnant with me in the back of a rusted truck with a Mississippi license plate. They decided to keep me and she moved in with him a state away. 
My dad was a good dad. As good as he could be. He stayed drunk most of the time, just so he could tolerate being in the same room as my mom without having to mentally be there...but he adored me. He even cut back on spending money on booze to put it towards my beauty pageants. 
Don't ask me why my mom felt the need to have me compete to be the prettiest two year old in our county, but she did. 
With the money from two successful pageants, at three years old, my mom decided she and I were gonna move to California so she could pimp me out to an industry that was going to take everything it could from me. 
My dad tried to fight for custody, but my mom played the "he's an alcoholic" card and got custody. He wrote often, and sent presents, and as much child support as he was able to, but anytime he would call she would hang up. He eventually drank himself to death when I was four, and that didn't phase my mom a bit. He'd been dead to her before she even gave birth to me.
One of the many things he and I had in common.
I hang up and finish stirring my coffee. 
"That was Vivian." I tell my mom when I pass by to go to my room. 
"You need to be spending some more time with her. She's a good kid." She states. "She knows how not to fuck every guy in her graduating class and beyond." She adds and I stop and glare at the back of her head before deciding it's not worth an argument.
"Don't forget you have practice at 3:00." She adds and I sigh. 
How could I possibly forget? She never let me go a day without reminding me we were broke because she put all of our money towards my pageants and competitive cheer—things she wanted me to be in, not things I chose. They looked good. Pretty. Things 5'3", 120 pound barbie blonde's did. Things my mother did and things she'd be damned if her daughter didn't do, too…
One thing about cheering, though. In the midst of a stunt, where you're elevated anywhere between 10-15 feet, your equilibrium can't be fucked and fried. And after a night of snorting anything with a powder base, and drinking your throat raw with vodka or Jack…
"What the hell is wrong with you, Tansy, can you not understand what '1, 2, down, up,' means?!" My mom barks at me as the gymnasium spins from where I fell, my head aching while my vision splotches for a moment, my cheermates leaning over me, all of them asking me if I'm okay. 
"I lost my balance." I shakily reply, trying to sit up, seeing my mom bulldoze through the girls to see me.
"No shit, Sherlock, if you were in proper form and prepared you wouldn't have fallen. Now get up and start over and if you fall again I'm taking you to the hospital and fucking leaving you there with the bill. Get up." She snaps. 
I get up like a puppet master tugging the strings of their puppet, demanding it to move.
"You need to work on your front tuck. It's  sloppy." Mom informs me once practice is over as we walk to the car. 
"My hip is acting up again." I tell her, honestly, the joint of my left hip aching with each step and she sighs. 
"I don't see how with all the time you spend on your back." 
"Will you stop, mom?" 
She looks at me with raised brows. 
"I'll stop when you stop opening your legs for free. I'm gonna make you start payin' rent if you don't start sleeping with men that can write a check that doesn't bounce."
"I'm not a prostitute, mom."
"Oh, please, everybody's a prostitute, Tansy, but it's up to you what you accept as profit. Love isn't profit. Tangibles you can deposit into an account for interest or rack up value over time, is profit." She argues, pointing at me, before leaving me standing. 
"Well, maybe I don't want 'tangibles' or whatever." I suggest, following after her. 
"Okay, put it this way: everybody's gonna die at some point. Would you rather be well known across the country for actually being a somebody, or have your only claim to fame be 'that midget-short, blonde slut that did everything for a bindle of coke?"
Before I can answer she cuts me short:
"Well, you'll be the second one, regardless, but at least strive to be known as 'that rich and famous midget-short, blonde slut that did everything for a bindle of coke'."  
"I'm not a slut, mom." I tell her calmly when we get into the car. 
"Not what I've heard." She pulls a cigarette from her purse and cranks the car. 
"Not everything you hear is true, you know."
"So, you weren't simultaneously sucking and fucking Chance Scarbors and Duke Vera a couple weekends ago at Tracy Lennols party you just had to go to?" 
My heart sinks when she asks me and I look at her and can't confirm nor deny. 
"If you could multitask like that while cheering, you'd be able to have a tighter front tuck than what you've got now." She states and I bite my tongue. "I wasn't a whore when I was in high school, it's obviously something you must've picked up from your dad. God, burn his soul, selfish bastard." 
As she starts on a rant about how shitty my dad was, which I know he wasn't, I just close my eyes and zone out. 
Every mistake I made was my dad's fault...at least to my mom. All my talent and looks was all her, but my rebellious streak, my addiction struggles, my "weak heart" and sensitivity...and people pleasing, was all my dad's fault. And honestly, maybe it was.
All he did was try to make my mom happy, he just had to have enough alcohol in his system to tolerate her screaming at him. 
Looking back, it's safe to say I am definitely my father's daughter.
TWO MONTHS LATER.
"Fuck this." I grit out, trying to cover the dark circles under my eyes with concealer. To no avail.
Freshly washed, teased, blonde hair, blue eyes, healthy skin—aside from the dark circles.
I finish putting my makeup on and get dressed to go out tonight. 
"Viv's coming at seven!" I shout down to my mom. 
"Are you gonna eat while you're out?!" She calls back to me. 
"Probably!" I reply. 
She doesn't answer. 
Once I hear Vivian's car pull in, I put my heels on and step to the living room. 
"You can't eat if you don't have money to buy it." My mom tells me as I pass by where she's sitting in her chair. 
"Viv's got money." I shrug. 
"Vivian shouldn't have to pay for your lazy ass." She snaps at me. 
"She doesn't care, mom." 
"Hey," Vivian says when she comes inside, smiling at me. "You look so good." She adds. 
"Vivian, c'mere," mom calls and I roll my eyes, clenching my jaw as Viv slowly goes to the living room, looking at my mom. 
"Ma'am?" Vivian asks and mom blows her cigarette smoke past her lips. 
"Where you girls headed?" 
"The Rainbow to grab something to eat." Vivian lies.
"I heard you got a boyfriend." She says next. 
"Um, he's not my boyfriend, we're just—"
"—He gonna be there tonight?" She interrupts and I cross my arms as Vivian shrugs.
"I don't know." She answers, honestly, and my mom looks at the two of us, skeptically before she finishes, "quit giving her free handouts." She motions to me, before waving us off dismissively.
We go to the front door and she adds, "don't do anything stupid!" 
"'Just friends', yeah right." I say to Vivian as we get into the car. 
"Shh!" She scolds me. "If your mom finds out she'll tell my mom and my mom can't know I even know Nikki or I'm screwed." 
"No if Charlette Renée Kinston finds out her innocent Jesus-baby is getting fucked by Nikki Sixx on the regular—"
"—Will you stop saying it like that? It's not like that, we don't do that." 
"Oh, please, Vivian. That's all he knows how to do." I reply. "Unless, like, you guys just 'make love'." I pretend to swoon and she cuts her eyes at me. 
"It's 'sex'." She corrects me. "It's not screwing or 'making love'. Just say 'sex'." 
"Technically I said 'fucking.' And there's a difference between 'screwing' and 'fucking'." 
"Whatever you call it, just don't say anything to Tommy or Vince about it, alright? Tommy would lose it and Vince wouldn't let me live it down so just don't mention it." She tells me. 
"Mention what? The fact that you lost your virginity to Nikki Sixx and have been bending over sinks and carhoods for him ever since? I wasn't going to." I reply and she glares at me. "You get, like, tested afterwards, right?" 
"Ha. Ha. Funny." She tells me and I smile, chuckling. 
"I was kidding." I say, buckling my seat belt. 
"Probably wouldn't hurt to get tested, honestly." She thinks aloud and I laugh.
When we get to where we're going, she finds an empty place on the lawn crowded with azalea bushes and what seems like endless vehicles parked where they can fit. 
"I swear if anyone hits my car…" she mumbles as we get out and shut the car doors. 
We can hear the music from out here, and Vivian waits for me to catch up before following me inside. 
"Shy or something?" I ask and she rolls her eyes. 
"I don't know any of these people." She replies. 
"And you think I do? This was the address the guys gave us." I remind her. 
We head inside, people shoulder to shoulder and I can feel Vivian tense up. 
Makes two of us. 
"Okay, um, look for Tommy. He's gotta be the tallest person here." She says to me as loud as she can over the bustle of people talking and drinking. 
"Got it." I nod. 
Apparently I didn't get the memo we were splitting up because in a second, she uses her long-ass legs to her advantage and is leaving me behind. 
"Ugh," I huff out, glancing around, not seeing anybody I recognized, and certainly not seeing ten foot Tommy. "Damn it."
Can't beat 'em, join 'em.
I go to find the booze, eventually finding it in the kitchen, keeping an eye out for Viv and the guys. 
I spot the cooler and as soon as I reach for it, a hand bumps into mine. 
I'm immediately looking up to see a sweet-faced guy with naturally curled, golden hair, and blue eyes. 
Before I can say "sorry" he's snatching his hand away like mine burnt him or something. 
"Sorry," I say anyway as he motions to the cooler and says, "no, you're good, go ahead." 
I grab a beer, and hand him one, too. 
"Thanks." He mumbles, not bothering to make eye contact. 
Which is fine because it gives me a couple more seconds to examine him. 
"Do I know you or something?" He asks me innocently after he catches me staring. 
"I don't know, maybe I've seen you around…" I shrug a little, smiling at him. "I'm Tansy."
"Steven." He replies, grinning. 
"Tans!" I hear someone yell and I turn to look through the crowd in the living room and see Vince.
"Um, I gotta go." I tell him. "But, I'll probably see you around some time." I add.
"Yeah, see ya around!" He says over the music as I'm walking away. 
We did eventually see each other around, about four years later.
"The hell have you been?" Vince asks me with a half grin. "Been looking all over for you."
He slings his arm over my shoulders as we head upstairs and I roll my eyes. 
"Why are we going upstairs?" I ask him, already knowing what's on his mind. 
"I needed help finding the bathroom." He chuckles, slurring a little, and I raise a brow but don't argue. 
People move down the hall, shifting into bedrooms in a frenzy as soon as others leave the rooms vacant, and I finally pinpoint a bathroom, opening the door, and stopping in my tracks. 
Vivian's on the counter, legs wide open, her hand in Nikki's hair as his mouth coaxes between her legs. 
She and I make eye contact for a split second before she's frantically pushing him away, accidentally poking him the eye in the midst of it, and he lets out a "fuck, Vi—" only for her to cover his mouth with her hand all while Vince approaches and asks, "what is i—" 
I don't give him time to finish asking, my hand shoving at his forehead before he can peek around the door, knocking him back as I slam the door.
He sloppily, and dramatically, braces himself against the wall and looks at me with wide eyes. 
"What the fuck, Tansy?" He asks me. 
"Sorry, it wasn't empty." Is all I say. "Here, I'll help you piss in the azaleas outside." 
"Whatever." He shrugs, grabbing my hand and I help him back downstairs. "Now my head hurts." He mumbles.
"Sorry."
"So I need a blowjob, too." He states pathetically. 
"Yeah, yeah."
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