#i need to cherish the thoughts they dont happen very often

[iwanttofuckereh69]

now reading 2ha vol2

ch 46 - 55

(sorry its a bit long, i wanted to be... coherent... this time lol)

btw tell me how much suffering i should expect from vol 2. on the scale from papercut to getting my heart ripped out 😭

Ok so… That lake thing was wild. Or so i thought, before Chu Wanning TURNED INTO A FUCKING KID. Like what the hell? He is either adorable or absurdly scary, no in between. I'm loving this so far.

I looked at that illustration in the book when I first got it  and I was more than confused because I couldn’t tell who was who. And for a moment I legit was like Is Chu Wanning a child? But then I was like NAAAAH CAN’T BE. Welp. Here we are :)))))) 

1. TL;DR: Chu Wanning is a horny lonely loser (affectionate)

Chu Wanning and his dreams. I have a hunch it's somehow a glimpse into their previous life. No idea how it would occur but that scene seems like something that might have happened?

It seems rather interesting to me that THIS would be Chu Wanning's fantasy. I couldn’t help but wonder if it isn’t because that’s the only way he would allow himself the pleasure. Because ultimately he doesn’t get to have a choice in that scenario. It takes away the guilt of lusting over his disciple. So maybe that’s where it came from. And, moreover, this is Mo Ran who wants CWN. Wants him so badly he can’t contain himself. I just found it really interesting that of all scenarios, CWN dreams of that one. I don’t know why I kept thinking about it but here we are ig lol

Also, Mo Ran destroyed his golden core in his past life? Did I miss that in vol 1? Because ohh :c. Or it wasn't Mo Ran???  

2. TL;DR: I’m gonna get hurt so so so bad

Mo Ran smiled. “Yep. Cause I’m closest with you, and I know you’d never lie to me.” Shi Mei was still hesitant. “That’s true, but…”

Welp. Based on community’s reactions that’s gonna hurt like motherfucker. I fucking know that line is there for a reason. I fucking know it. The reason is to break my heart. And isn’t it like a second time Shi Mei says something about not lying to Mo Ran? I WONDER WHY. (i might have remembered it wrong tbh but this part is there and is tormenting me)

3. TL;DR: Mo Ran’s emotional intelligence is at most equal to emotional intelligence of a lettuce (one that’s been sitting in the back of your fridge for weeks because you forgot about it); Also, Shi Mei is sweet and kind and i don’t believe any of you anymore. He can’t hurt a soul. 

Mo Ran is very adamant on hating Chu Wanning. He wants to hate him. He needs to hate him. As if he was scared of the feelings that might be left if he does not hate him. That part is specifically in relation to his conversation with Shi Mei and how uncomfortable he’s gotten when Shi Mei started going on and on about how Chu Wanning isn’t really all that bad. 

And then that part with the umbrella happened and I really wish it was from Mo Ran’s perspective, because for the love of god I have no idea what his intentions are. It seemed like a really bad and failed flirting attempt. Like me when I asked this guy that was in a band in school to tune my guitar but it was in fact in tune and it was just embarrassing tbh But it could be just him trying to be nice for whatever reason  and CWN overreacting because he is strong and independent and he doesn't need (no man) anyone. 

I’m really puzzled at Mo Ran tho. And, like, that’s not a bad thing. There is this part of him that hates Chu Wanning with every fiber in his body. But he also admires him deeply as a teacher and maaaybe tiny bit as a person. There is both disdain and interest. Hatred and kindness. His whole (other) life it seems like he had this image of Chu Wanning that was coldblooded and ruthless. And i feel like it’s shattering now that he starts to notice how it wasn’t really the case. But still it’s hard for him to put those two pieces together so he really tries to choose one. It’s really telling when he can’t answer Shi Mei’s question ab if he dislikes Shizun.

ALSO SHI MEI IS SO SWEET AND KIND I DONT BELIEVE ANY OF YOU. HE CANT BE EVIL. He can't be evil... He can't...

4. I’m just wondering why the thing that happened at the lake (i don’t remember how it’s spelled so it’s going to be THE LAKE) was so different to how it went the first time MR was there. Basically the one major change he’s purposefully made was that he stole money from Rong Jiu and didn’t fall for his trap. Could it be somehow connected? Because otherwise the events should be the same unless something was changed. And the only thing i can think of right now that he influenced in major way, is that whole deal with Rong Jiu. The ghost marriage "arc" ended more or less the same, didn't it? I might be mixing shit up but oh well.

Also, I saw a post the other day in which op was talking how Mo Ran’s love for Chu Wanning was clear to them from the very beginning. Op said they don’t understand how others might not get it and since i’m the one that wasn’t that keen on the idea at first, i decided to elaborate a bit on points i made after first 20 chapters or so, this time trying not to be as much of a clown (hopefully).

Well, I’ve seen the title of the book and I know they're gonna end up together one way or another. But its complicated and messy and I would even go as far as to say that’s the point? And, ironically it's also in the title. A dog and a cat. At first glance they are so different it seems almost impossible for them to get along. At first glance Chu Wanning and Mo Ran felt too different to be able to get along as well. There was too much resentment and too much things left unsaid (and unnoticed). After reading only first 20 chapters i was told that 1. Chu Wanning is ruthless and cruel 2. Mo Ran hates him. 3. Mo Ran is horny for him. Only with time as I was reading further, it turned out that they both care for each other in ways they themselves have a hard time explaining. 

I also don’t think sexual attraction equals everlasting love. And like, the fact that Mo Ran doesn’t get hard at the sight of Shi Mei isn’t telling me anything about his feelings. Does he really love him too much to have a single impure thought about him? Or does he not realize he doesn’t like him that way? Does he love him platonically? I don’t know. I’m for sure lacking context in this situation. That’s the point. I want to read it with my mouth open agape as I get to know those characters more and as slowly my first impression changes. Right now, based on what i’ve been presented by the book I adore Mo Ran’s puppy love for Shi Mei. But as i’m on chapter 50, I see it as just that, a puppy love.  

I don’t want to argue who to ship, because that’s not the point im trying to make xD I just think my hesitation to picture CWN and MR together after first 20 chapters was not that weird. I know it will happen and i’m curious to see how long it will take those idiots to realize their feelings for eachother and express them. I know they are meant to be. But they themselves don’t know that yet. And it feels like they try their best to ruin every chance they get lol I’m also curious where those feelings come from. Why Mo Ran became so obsessed with CWN.

There is foreshadowing, there are those little and not so little things scattered across that slowly become more meaningful the more context you add on top of them. But those alone, in my opinion aren’t enough to be convinced with utmost certainty from page one that the main characters are in fact in love. It’s more complicated than that and that’s why I enjoy it a lot and i enjoy when the books makes me believe one thing to then make me realize it wasn't ever that simple. Am I making sense? Idk it's 1AM i want to go to sleep njkinrjgkn

#2ha #erha #the husky and his white cat shizun #erha he ta de bai mao shizun #2ha spoilers #now reading: 2ha #i almost tagged it as tgcf #so tired #but yeah once again sorry for the long post #i have thoughts ok #i need to cherish the thoughts they dont happen very often #did i mention how much i adore the name Xia Sini #idk why its just so cute

[kits-sch]

wish you were a boy

schoolgirl!ellie x reader

MEN DNI

this is such a rough draft, just a thought i had for a while now, if it’s shit plsdontkillme i Am just a girl 💔💔 very first ellie fic .. ooc ellie maybe idk actually. kinda corny close ur eyes

cw short, not very edited, kinda angst, internalized homophobia (?) on readers part.

you looked at the paper before you, a stark and bright red “3/20” on this bullshit math test glaring right at your face.

the teacher was useless, you thought. she did nothing to help, only rambling on and on about her failed, miserable love life. it seemed as if she became a teacher to have a free audience to vent to.

you were brought back out from your thoughts as you heard a familiar voice call out to you. it was your friend, ellie. you had known her for quite a while now, and you think you’ve lost track of how many years it’s been. she was wearing the schools uniform; long, plaid skirt with a white blouse. somehow, even in such a shitty uniform, she managed to look pretty.

“y/n? you alright there?” ellie took the empty seat next to you, her arm resting on her face as she stares at your paper. your eyes followed her intently. did her arm get more toned? has she been working out..?

“what a bust,” she chuckled at you, “i told you to come to me if you needed help.. now look what happened.”

right, how thoughtful of her. truth is, if you studied with her, the material would’ve been forgotten in mere seconds. even now, the only thing you can focus on is her face, the way her arm brushes against yours. your stomach often feels weird around her, as it would if you had a crush on someone. but ellie’s a girl.. and you couldn’t have a crush on a girl. that’s not how the world is intended, right?

“well, i thought i had it in the bag!” you argue back, scoffing at her, “i’m gonna need to retake this.. i swear it’s all that teachers fault.”

ellie smiles, “i’ll help you study this time, yeah? dont tell me no,” she says, her green eyes boring into your own.

“yeah, yeah..” you sigh, defeated.

ellie can only laugh at you again, observing your saddened state. suddenly, she gets an idea in her head and swiftly grabs your arm, pulling you out the classroom door.

“h-hey, ellie!” you yelp, your face feeling hot at the simple touch, “where are we going??” she doesnt bother to respond to you, dragging you along on this adventure of hers.

before you know it, you’re out in the courtyard of your school. it’s break time, and there’s many kids out on the field.. so you’re wondering what’s she’s going to do. but ellie keeps walking, until you reach a side on the field where no one is around. there’s a couple run down bleachers, and ellie finally lets your hand go — you can’t help but feel a little sadden at the loss of her touch. the brunette before you sits down, motioning for you to do the same. as soon as you do, she pulls you gently to lay your head on her lap.

“.. you’re weird,” it’s all you can say as ellie starts to softly play with your hair, you’re trying your best to ignore the thumping of your heart, the way you feel insanely flustered with her hands in your hair. her touch is so delicate, a feeling you’d like to cherish for a lifetime.

“what? you were obviously stressed. found this little spot a couple weeks ago and i thought of you. can you believe our school actually is capable of quiet?” ellie’s fingers continue to intertwine in your hair, she does it so casually.

the butterflies in your stomach seem to be circling around, and you’re trying, once again, to suppress the feeling. ellie and yours friendship is already being questioned by some of your peers. sure, friends can be touchy at times.. but it seems like whenever you and ellie are together; it’s as if you both replicate a couple who have grown old together.

your eyes rest on her face, and she’s not looking at you, but rather quite focused on your hair. you wonder if she’s trying to avoid eye contact with you as well. the freckles on her face have become a sight for sore eyes, you swore that if someone asked you how many she had you would be able to recite it from memory.

but you can’t allow yourself to feel this way. not in a town like this, not in a school like this, not in a life like this. loving anyone but a boy, a man, was disgusting, it was forbidden. it was a thought that was constantly pounded into your head, that it’s always supposed to be man and woman. you knew that.

ellie, now noticing your silence has her brows slightly furrowed — her eyes landing on yours, full of concern, “are you okay? you haven’t said a thing,” ellie has stopped playing with your hair, her sculpted hands now resting on the coldness of the bench.

there’s another small silence that embarks you both, and right as she’s about to open her mouth to speak again,

“i wish you were a boy.”

your voice was quiet, and the only thing you could hear was the background noise of the laughter of your peers as they were playing games. there’s a light, cold breeze that passes by the both of you, the leaves in the trees around you dancing slightly. your eyes don’t tear away from ellie’s; a bold thought that was meant to stay a thought had already been voiced. you don’t feel any regret, but rather your shoulders feel lighter as you look up at the girl before you; her mouth parted slightly and eyes now widened. your words are something that could be taken a couple different ways; but looking at her now, the way she knows your ins and outs, you know she perfectly understood what you were trying to say.

“you.. what?”

#ellie #ellie the last of us #tlou #tlou2 #ellie x reader #ellie williams #ellie x y/n #ellie x you #ellie x fem reader #ellie williams x reader #tlou fanfiction #tlou part 2 #ellie smut #ellie smau #ellie angst #ellie fluff #ellie tlou

[idyllic-affections]

big brother kazuha and big sister beidou.... im so soft

i see kazuha as the gentle, calm, comforting big brother while beidou is more of the badass, fun sister

kazuha can and will sing you to sleep. and beidou will hold you up while on the crux so you can see the sea clearly (and if you get seasick kazuha takes care of you while beidou pops up every so often to make you laugh a lil)

i love them

big brother kazuha and big sister beidou.

summary. what are kazuha and beidou like as big siblings?

trigger & content warnings. insomnia, seasickness/motion sickness, brief mentions of medication.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. fluff. kazuha & reader, beidou & reader. 0.5k words. no pronouns for reader.

author's thoughts. you literally have the best brainrots omg <33 you're so right though aly! they would be the best big siblings fr. this was my first time writing beidou and it made me VERY nervous but honestly? i love her. i dont talk about her enough. learning to write her is simply a thing that takes practice and patience c:

kazuha is the calm and somewhat responsible big brother (he was technically running from the law at one point, so...), whereas beidou is the excitable and fun big sister.

big brother kazuha, who either sings you to sleep or reads to you until you fall asleep on difficult nights. his voice is so gentle and soothing; it's hard not to fall asleep when listening to him. his voice alone is thoroughly comparable to a lullaby. he doesn't even have to be singing. the soft tones of his voice are enough of a melody on their own. he's just so... indescribably gentle, like the calmest breeze grazing your skin on a hot day, so it's hardly any surprise that he's such a master at resolving insomnia.

big sister beidou, who tells you exciting tales of her adventures like one would to a young child, regardless of your age. she illustrates her stories with skill that many bards could only ever dream of—the way she so seamlessly manages to make her adventures come alive in anyone's mind is a talent so many could only hope to attain. it's hard to know where she got such a skill, but then again... maybe that's just because of her vibrant personality? the stories may or may not aid you in falling asleep, but she can almost always call upon kazuha if she happens to fail, so there's nothing to worry about.

big brother kazuha, who perches himself on a good vantage point on the alcor with you and points out fun shapes in the clouds or in the foamy water. maybe he'll write poetry while you sit beside him in calm silence. maybe he'll end up taking a nap with you curled at his side as the wind from the open ocean glides gently, soothingly, over your peaceful faces. who knows? regardless of how that time is spent, it becomes a sort of bonding ritual.

big sister beidou, who will effortlessly hoist you up onto her shoulders regardless of your weight because lets be honest—beidou should be beyond muscular. she's impossibly strong, so don't worry about it. she wants you to be able to clearly witness the might of the vast ocean! that's one of the best parts of travelling by sea! you've got to both admire its beauty and respect its danger. the sea is a wild beast worthy of awe. though, if you get seasick... she'd definitely feel a little guilty.

big brother kazuha, who tends to your needs while you're seasick. he helps administer whatever medication works best for you—which beidou likely picked up from baizhu one of the times she was in liyue—and makes such you stay hydrated. he'll make a mental note of your tendency towards motion sickness and will remember to give you medication before future trips begin. he's very attentive.

big sister beidou, who pops in every now and then to either apologize for getting you seasick or to make you laugh because laughter is so impossibly cherished by her. she treasures all the smiles and laughs she can get from her crew, you included. <3

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

#aphelion brainrots 🌸 #favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #platonic genshin x reader #platonic genshin impact #platonic genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #beidou x reader #kazuha x reader #platonic beidou x reader #platonic kazuha x reader

[charredstarling]

Just some shadow work

Why do you hold grudges: Because if i let go, i have to reckon with what happened. if they arnt really as terrible as i thought then theres a chance that it wasnt their fault that i was hurt. it also calls into question the abusers that i do not forgive, what if they arnt that bad either? and that train of thought had led me right back into the arms of those who hurt me on multiple occasions. Its safer to hate a select few than to doubt the validity of my trauma.

Why do you feel undeserving of love: because for most of my life i wasnt shown love unconditionally, i was only shown praise when i did my very best. otherwise i was yelled at or hurt because i wasnt doing good enough. even when i wasnt doing anything wrong i was punished, and i carry that with me today. i do not let myself feel loved unless i believe that i am doing the very best that i could be doing, and i rarely ever feel like i am doing good enough. i motivate myself by yelling and screaming and hurting myself because its what pushed me when i was younger, but now it doesnt do anything good for me. when i am shown love i feel confused and doubtful, because unconditional love feels fake to me.

How often do you lie to yourself: Every day from the second i wake up to the second i fall asleep. I say i am ok and that i feel fine and that i can handle all of this on my own and its a blatant lie and everyone around me knows it. i cant admit consistently that i am not capable of handling all of this on my own, and i also cannot ask for help because i feel unworthy of it. it is my job to handle all of this so that others dont have to. but that isnt fair to me, and i lie and say that its ok and that life isnt fair. i lie when i say i love myself and i lie when i say that im doing good because thats all surface level, i havent even started breaking down my old thought patterns yet. and i shouldnt have to alone because rebuilding oneself is a monumental feat. but in my mind i am a burden and i must do this alone, so that maybe someday someone will be able to tolerate me in full.

What emotions do you avoid feeling: anger. i never learned to process it properly and so no matter how justified it is i end up scaring myself out of feeling it. i worry that feeling angry means i will hurt people, because i was hurt when others were angry. thats when i was abused, when they were angry. and i fear that just the action of feeling that anger will unleash some hidden abusive monster inside of me and ill go around attacking everyone i see.

How can you face that feeling: sitting with it when i feel it. just letting it run through my system without trying to distract myself. letting my mind construct whatever arguments or insults it wants and ranting to friends until ive felt all i can feel for that moment.

How can you motivate yourself: by being gentle. i need to stop trying to use fear as a motivator and start using my passion as a motivator. and to do that i need to step away from fear, i need to be gentle with myself and forgiving of my misteps.

What has love taught you: that i am beautiful and kind and smart and amazing. and that i am compassionate and enjoyable and funny. love has taught me that i am not some horrible broken thing, that i am a person just like anyone else. love has taught me that i am deserving, and that people are kind and that they do care.

What has loss taught you: That life is something to cherish, and that no amount of time will feel like enough. and that sometimes its better to let go or to leave. and that some people arnt meant to stay, some people werent all that great in retrospect. loss has taught me to be scared of it, because to be abandoned is to lose. but loss has also taught me to greive, and to cry, and to scream. loss has taught me how to process things, how to feel. in some loss there is a relief, a comfort. in some there is an anger. loss has guided me

What are you hiding from others: that im actually just a scared animal thats wandering around hoping that i figure something out. that i am not actually all that wise, i am just hurt. that i am not all that in touch with myself and that its all a front to try and avoid the truth. the truth is that i am a wounded scared animal wandering around in a hostile world with no clue what i should be doing. i cannot tend to my wounds lest someone else notices they are there, and i cannot ask for help lest someone sees me as a pet or a project.

What can you learn from time: That i cannot stop it, i cannot make it slow, but i can rest. i can rest as long as i need. i cannot expect the world to stop spinning but i can expect others who live in this sea of time to be understanding. we are all here together in the same storm.

#freya 🐈🐗 🐝 #shadow work diary

[mmmaruda]

I need to get this of my chest. My parents have had enough of listening to me saying the same shit over and over again.

I feel like nobody talks about this enough. I'm almost an adult yet I haven't experienced being desired by someone romantically. I naver hold hands kissed, texted with someone or even had a crush. I kinda accepted that theres a big chance of me being aromamtic but just because i am aro doesnt mean i want to be. Theres nothing wrong with being aro but I want to know how it feels. How its possible that one person makes someone so happy, I want to feel that. I want to be desired, to have someone that appriciates me and maybe an ego bust. Idk about being in a relationship but someone having a crush on me or smh. To confirm that Im lovable. Of course I'm still young and have plenty time to experience it but I feel like it will never happen. I want to feel wanted, to have someone that cherished me. To have a deeper connection. Maybe the issue lies in me being unlikeable? The last time I had someone I could call my best friend I was in primary school. I have friends, I'm just never their first option. We mostly see each other at school, but when we do go out I just know we don't click. I sit there all day waiting to go home. I feel very often sad and frustrated because of this. I'm not seeking a romantic relationship but a platonic one. Yet I'm still unsuccessful in finding both. People say that you find love when you dont try, it comes naturally. That I need to focus on myself but when I do this I only see my classmates and family so where would it even come from. I have a big problem with meeting new people. I don't know how to do it. For the past 3 years I have been working on myself. Since then I can actually talk to someone without stressing out and crying. I signed up for multiple events in my school just to meet new people and it never happens. I'm so lost, i dont know what to do. In primary school I felt fulfilled because I was around people I genuinely liked. They made me happy, my life didnt revolve around them but they were making my everyday life nicer. Still we werent that close and we lost contact. We dont call, meet, or even write to each other. Some of them met their current partners and just gave up on friends. People prioritising romantic relationships over platonic are shallow and fell victim of patriarchy. It seems like by society our only goal in life is to find a romantic partner, get married and have kids. Even if it's someone lgbt who cant have bio children, people still expect them to find their "other half", because it's "how life works". I feel like I'm never going to love anyone and nobody is going to love me. I have this one closer friend that always has my back just like I have theirs but they're always so busy with other people. It hurts honestly so much. Like half a year ago we went to see spiderverse since and I decided to be bold. I asked them If I could videocall them that night because I had so many thoughts after the movie. But they said that tonight they had already made plans with someone else. There's nothing wrong with it but at that moment it hit me. They're always doing something and I can never make plans with them because of it. I value them more then they value me. I'm not their first choice person. I was also restraining myself from becoming to close/depended on them because in the past being too clingy made me lose friends. So why everyone has someone close and I don't. Why I don't have someone I could do matching bracelets with or pfp. I'm a filler person. I here just because not bc anyone wants me. I want to make more irl friends but I don't know how. I know it's not my personality or looks but something is wrong with me. I think it's because I miss a lot of social clues but idk. I just want friends.

#relationship #frienship #lonliness #mental health #what do i do #im a loser fr

[chaos-writes-fanfiction]

You’re in love with him

A/n I gave his mom the name Mei.

Warnings: none just some fluff, friends to lovers

Pairings: Aone × fem!reader

Being best friends with Aone came easily having your mother’s being best friends and living down the street from one another meant spending lots of time with him becoming close friends your selves. Always going to school together and waiting for him during practice so you can go home together. Having weekly sleepovers alternating who’s house unless he was away for a game, tournament or training camp.

And today you made your way to the gym to watch practice while doing homework, before staying at his house for the weekend. When you walk in the guys were still stretching.

“Hey guys” you said walking in

They greeted you with several ‘hey’ or 'hi’ from them as they started to warm up. Taking your normal seat and starting on your homework. When suddenly a volleyball comes flying at you unexpectedly and smashing into the side of your face. The whole team freezes except Aone who is running up to you.

“Way to go” Futakuchi said sarcastically to Koganegawa “dont be surprised when Aone kills you for hitting her”

“Let me see” Aone said softly moving your hand away from your cheek

Your cheek was very red and bruising already as tears fell down your cheeks. He ghosted his thumb over your cheek to wipe your tears

“Ow” you whimpered

“Here” Sakunami said handing Aone a ice pack that he wrapped a towel in so the ice wasn’t directly on your skin

He took it and gently placed it on your cheek holding your face so gently in his hand. You gently place your hand over his on your cheek.

“Thanks bear” you whisper his childhood nickname

He smiled softly at that. Then his smile dropped as he removed his hand from your cheek your hand still holding the ice pack as he turned and glared at Koganegawa.

“I promise it was an accident I didnt mean to” Koganegawa said quickly

“Then why haven’t you apologized to her?” Sakunami asked

Koganegawa ran over to you hanging his head

“I’m so sorry Senpai” he said “I didnt mean to”

“Please be more careful Koganegawa” you said

He nodded and they went back to practice you packed up your things as you waited for them to clean up to walk home with Aone. Your cheek still hurt and it had potential to give you a black eye from where it hit your cheek.

“Let’s go” Aone said when they were finished

“Can I get a piggyback ride to the train station?” You asked

He nodded and crouched down. You climb on and he holds your legs as you wrap your arms around his neck as he starts walking to the train station, resting your non bruised cheek against his his back. He set you down while waiting for the train. When you finally arrive to his house you walk in taking off your shoes in the now permanent space for you since you were over so often.

“Are you kids home?” His mom calls from the kitchen

“Yes we are Mei” you said

“Dinner is just about ready if you want to wash up” she said

Aone walks up to the bathroom to shower quickly before dinner. As you walk into the kitchen washing your hands to help finish making dinner.

“How are you dear?” Mei asked her back to you

“I’m good” you said as you move next to her cutting up some green onion

“What happened to your face?” She asked alarmed seeing the bruise

“I was watching practice and I got hit with a stray spike” you said

“Oh dear” she said “have you iced it?”

“Yes, bear made me right after it happened” you said

She smiled at the use of Aones nickname “of course he did” she said “but it looks like it still going to be around for a little while.”

“Yeah unfortunately” she said “the first year that accidentally hit me felt so bad I thought he was going to start crying”

She giggled softly and you both finished up making dinner which was shoyu ramen (soy sauce based)

“Will you go get him for dinner?” Mei asked

You nod and go upstairs to his room the shower wasn’t going anymore. So you walk to his door and knock. He opens the door letting you in. Hes drying his hair from his shower wearing black sweats and a white tshirt.

“Dinner is ready” you said smiling up at him.

“What are we having?” He asked putting the towel in his basket

“Ramen” you said

“Good its going to be cold tonight” he said.

He lightly touches your cheek again.

“I’m okay” you said

“I know I worry still” he said

“You always do” you said leaning into his touch and turn to kiss the palm of his hand “let’s go eat”

You take his hand in yours not noticing the wash of pink on his cheeks as you lead him down to the table and taking your normal seat beside him. After dinner and helping him clean up, his mom left going to the store to get some groceries and some snacks for the both of you for the weekend.

You go upstairs with him, he started on his homework and you lounge on his bed keeping him company when your phone started ringing.

“I’ll be right back” you tell him as you leave his room

You walk to the living room. And sit down and answer your girl bestfriends call

“Hey, Yachi” you said

“Hey honey” she said

“What’s up?” You asked

“I wanted to ask if you wanted to have a sleep over this weekend” she said “me, kiyoko and Saeko are here”

“Oh I can’t, I’m already staying at Aone’s this weekend” you said

“Have you confessed to him yet?” Saeko asked

“What do you mean? Hes my best friend we’ve been friends our whole lives my mom and his mom are childhood bestfriends too” you said

“You spend all your time with him unless hes away for volleyball” she said

“Well yeah…” you said

“Did something happen?” Kiyoko asked

“I got hit with a stray spike in the face” you said

“And how did he react?” Yachi asked

“He ran over right away and checked on me and gave me an ice pack after wiping my tears away” you said

“And after practice?” Saeko asked

“He gave me a piggyback ride to the train station and we took the train home, I helped his mom finish making dinner and we ate, I was keeping him company in his room while he did homework until you called” you said

“I hate to be the one to say it but you and him act more like boyfriend and girlfriend not friends” kiyoko said

You sat in silence for a little while thinking about everything.

“Hey are you still there?” Saeko asked

“Oh god” you said

“You’re in love with him” kiyoko said you could hear the smile in her voice

“Yeah…” you trailed off

“Then go tell him” Saeko said

“Is everything alright dear?” Mei asked

You hang up the phone and look up at her as she stood in front of you

“I just realized something” you whispered looking down

“What?” She asked concerned

“I’m in love with him” you whispered afraid to say it too loudly

“Who?” She asked tilting your chin up “Takanobu?”

“Yes” you whispered nodding

She smiled and kissed your forehead “I’m happy you finally figured it out” she said

“What?” You asked confused

“Your mom and I were wondering when you’d finally figure it out” she said

“Really?” You asked “you both knew?”

“Oh my dear, I’m pretty sure the only ones who didnt know were you and him” she said smiling “now, why dont you go tell him”

You nod a little hesitantly but go back upstairs after texting yachi why you hung up so suddenly. When you walk back in hes closing his text books

“Finished already?” You asked

“Yes” he said standing up and walking over to sit on his bed

You go and sit beside him.

“Can I tell you something?” You asked

“Of course” he said

You take a deep breath and let it out slowly resting your head on his shoulder “I love you, more than just friends” you said

He stiffened for a moment “you do?” He asked turning to look at you

You look back at him and nod

“I-I” he started but took a breath “I love you too, more than just a friend”

“You do?” You asked

“Yes, I have for a while” he said and he reaches into his bedside table and pulled out a letter and handed it to you

“What’s this?” You asked

“Read it” he said

You open the letter and read it;

'My dear,

We’ve been friends for as long as I remember and I’ve never been good with words; but I want you to know I cherish our friendship, but lately I find myself wanting more, I want to hold your hand when we are walking together, not just around town but at school too, I want to hold you in my arms when we have our weekly sleep overs, to wear my volleyball jacket when you come to my games. I guess I’m saying that I want you to be my girlfriend. I’ve loved you for a while now and it’s taken me this long to tell you how I feel.

-Love your Bear’

“I’ll gladly be your girlfriend” you said as tears fell down your cheeks

He wiped away your tears and kissed your forehead. You look up at him and lean towards him and gently kiss his lips, he kissed you back gently before pulling away smiling. You smile back and cuddle up to him as he gently plays with your fingers and his hand in yours. The both of you end up falling asleep cuddling.

A few weeks later, you’re getting ready, Saeko is picking you up to take you with her to a training camp to surprise Aone. You hear her honking and you run out and climb in handing Hinata your bag.

“Okay go” you said

“Are you excited?” Saeko asked

“Of course I am” you said “I’m always excited to see my boyfriend”

“Dont you see him every day?” Hinata asked

“Yep but he doesn’t know that I’m coming” you said smiling

About 45 minutes later and nearly dying from Saekos insane driving three times you finally arrive at the training camp, the first ones out are Hinata and Kageyama. Then you and Saeko got out walking towards the gym where the teams were taking a short break between games. The next team’s going up were Date Tech and Karasuno. Kiyoko and Yachi see you first.

“You came!” Yachi said smiling as she runs over and hugs you

“Saeko picked me up” you said and hug her back

“Good, we needed a few other girls” Kiyoko said smiling taking her hug

“Please, shes ditching us for her boyfriend” Saeko said rolling her eyes playfully

“Boyfriend?” Nishinoya asked “this beautiful goddess has a boyfriend?”

“Yep” you said smiling

“Who?” He asked

“Watch” Yachi said

Just then Date Tech walked over and you smile as you see your boyfriends eyes widen seeing you here. You run up to him jumping into his waiting arms wrapping your arms around his neck as he held your thighs, giving him a kiss on the cheek

“Hey” he said softly

“Hey baby” you said smiling hugging him tightly

He was holding you close not paying any attention to the stares from the other teams. As they watched the iron wall be soft for his girlfriend. He sets you back down on your feet, but holds your hand.

“Come meet my friends” you said he nods and follows you over, “this is, Kiyoko, Yachi and Saeko, kiyoko and yachi are Karasunos managers and Saeko is Tanakas older sister”

“Hi” he said “I’m Aone”

“Oh we know a lot about you” Saeko said smirking at you “this one talks about you all the time”

“Saeko I do not” you said blushing deep red

“Except you do” Kiyoko said

You whine a little bit embarrassed and hide your face in Aones chest. He starts stroking your hair.

“Its fine dear, I dont mind you talking about me” he said.

“Aone were about to start” Futakuchi said calling him over

“Go, good luck” you said

He lets you go and kisses your lips quickly before running back over to his team.

“Its definitely safe to say that you’re in love with him” Kiyoko said

“Yes I am” you said smiling watching your boyfriend getting ready to play

“So should we expect wedding invitations after you graduate?” Saeko asked in a teasing tone

“Maybe” you said blushing.

#aone x reader #aone takanobu #aone fluff #aone #takanobu aone x reader #haikyuu takanobu #childhood friend #childhood friends to lovers #getting together #love notes #love confessions #fluff

[ilysmxiao]

scarred palms | xiao x reader

summary : xiao had told you the story of the scars on the skin that showed, perhaps he was insecure of so, as he was shy to speak of such stories. as one wouldn’t expect, words shared amoungst humans were rarely ever original, though, it was the first he had ever heard such words . character(s) : xiao warnings : mentions of self harm. tho this is comfort !! a/n : came up w this and thought it would be nice !! pls send me some nice requests, rn i mainly write for zhongli, xiao, and kazuha -- though, i can try out other characters! i need to experiment w my writing pfft

            “ it’s the way you speak,                            forming words so easily.                                          i think of the way you think,                                                         it keeps me from falling asleep. “                                                   °· ꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱ ·°

it had been a rough night for xiao, after returning from a recent battle. he rest upon the roof of wangshu inn, settling under the stars that found their spot amongst the very place he protected. the calm, but very much alive atmosphere buzzled below -- the people finding their way back home after the small celebration they held, holding the hands of their lovers as they walked to their rooms.  the thought of love was one he despised, hating the human emotions that created a home in anothers heart -- though, at the same time, he knew that he, himself, had grown ill to such a particular thing.  the tiles shifted ever so slightly, as feet carefully scaled their way across them. it had become a normal thing to hear, at times at these, and the barer of who made those tiles shift was not unknown. it had become a normal routine, and to xiao, it was one he looked forward to on days such as these -- he would never admit to such, instead, hide his delighted heart from his lover when he felt the pressure of their head leaning against his shoulder, and the way they cautiously and lovingly they rubbed the back of his shoulder blades.  in all of xiaos years of guarding liyue, watching many people walk along the very land he protected, seeing many pleasing faces that he had shown no care for, he had never expected one to be the fault of the feelings he had never seemingly dealt with before. one to make him feel human, almost, showing him that any person, human or not, could learn to love. as if, that anything but humans felt that emotion, more or less understood it.  a question was not needed to know how the adepti was doing, nor did an answer need to suffice. after spending the time that they had with the male, seeing him come home with new scars and marks on his already tethered body, it was enough to understand how long those scars would stay with him.  resting a hand upon the fresh scars, you glance at xiao, who had trained his eyes on the abyss above the two. his hand shied away from yours, retreating to the home by his side.  “our scars hold meaning, yours show and hold such complicity that many would never understand -- sometimes, even i will never truly understand what you go through.” to this, xiao turned his ill gaze to his lover, curious of what else they had to say. though such words were often spoke amongst the morals he protected, he had yet to have one say such things to himself. never would he recover from his battles, his scars earning their place on the patches of skin he had, taunting him, but words of comfort from his lover would suffice and slowly take away the hurt that they held. “that takes away no meaning. no matter what you do, how many layers you wear to protect yourself from the blades colliding with your skin, you can not escape it. it is important to understand that, and while doing so, know that you can slowly heal from it.” you comfortingly reached towards xiaos hand, softly picking it up and bringing it to your lips. the feeling brought tingling sensations through his body, earning a slight shiver from so. “scars are horrible, but we all have some. they’re unavoidable. what matters is not how they were formed, but how we deal with it, and what we do from there on.” after letting go of the others hand, you raised yours slightly and brought to attention of the many that littered your own. it had been known to xiao that you had your own scars, but to his dismay and disappointment, he truly never understood how many you had. it made his heart sink, seeing how many of them were seemingly self inflicted -- he wondered why you would ever do such a thing to yourself, not understanding why mortals would hurt themselves, or how much could have lead themselves to the point to doing so. “whats the point in self loathing and wishing for better, if you won’t take steps in that direction? they’re apart of you, you can’t escape that, but you can give them meaning and make them worth seeing. my point is, you can’t hide it, don’t embrace them if you dont want to, but don’t let your scars define you. it’s a thing thats often said.., but as much as it is said, it still holds meaning. and you do not deserve to forever hold onto these things and only see them as bad, no matter where they are from, or how they were caused.” despite having multiple, loving occasions the both had shared that made their relationship ever so more beautiful, xiao felt himself grow even more attached to you, the coldness in his heart melting ever so slightly with each word you spoke. silence followed after the few words you spoke, making you begin to regret ever speaking up in the first place -- showing your vulnerable side, showcasing your own scars as if you had healed from them yourself.  “i’m sorry, i rambled on,” you admit, shame contorting your expression into a unsatisfied one.  though, unexpectantly, you felt a warmth engulf your body -- xiao replacing the cold breeze that comfortably sat between the gap. xiao had never been one to show his affection, finding small gestures more suitable for the feeling of love he had never fully understood. as days progressed, he began to find out more, finally beginning to realize that this what was love was. what was shown by mortals, the affection they gave each other on a day to day basis, it was only the surface; the surface being all that he knew, thinking it was just that. you had taught him that it was more than so, it was not just loving kisses and comforting hugs, it was the mutual understanding that no matter what happened, you would both be there for each other. to care for one another, to relic in the moments that would soon become history, and to cherish them as if there would be not another day to experience them. love was what you taught him, and until the day you left the day of the living, he would be sure to do what he could to show that -- even if all that he was capable of was muttering a small ‘i love you’, or giving you a hug if he could not find the correct words to show how much you meant to him. the grip he held on your shirt tightened, your arms intertwining with his to return the gesture. xiao nuzzled his face into your neck, eyes shutting tightly as he did so. a small smile formed on your lips, understanding that the other had appreciated what you said. “i love you,” xiao said quietly, breaking the small silence that had grown comfortable in the lap of your air. you could hear the slightly labored breathing escaping his lips, the warm air grazing your neck and dissipating each time he let another breath of air out. his warm body was pressed against your own, chest rising and falling until he soon calmed down. “i love you too, xiao.” in that moment, xiao’s repulsive and deprecating thoughts ceased, thinking of only you and the comfort you gave him. the silence from before returned, engulfing the area near, but this time, it was comfortable -- he could bask in your presence forever, especially in this moment. he couldn’t wish for anything better than you, in the life he had been given. although he was an adepti, prone to straying away from such putrid human feelings, he felt himself nearing acceptance of his want for such love to stay, more or less to stay beside him forevermore.  xiao was unable to be healed from the horrid fate at which he had been given, but little by little, he understood that not all was bad and he could one day learn not to hate it.

#xiao x reader #genshin xiao x reader #xiao x reader fluff #xiao x reader comfort #genshin imagine #genshin x reader #genshin impact #genshin xiao #genshin impact x reader #fluff #comfort #angst #genshin imagines

[lavenderjacobs]

fluff alphabet - Sapnap

➳ wc; 2,1K (she’s a long one lol)  ➳ pronouns; gender neutral<3 ➳ song reccomendation; heart eyes - coin

A=Attractive (What do they find most attractive in a partner?)

nick’s an ass guy and you can’t convince me otherwise. he’s also just loves your thighs and your stomach. he loves how soft your skin is, and how good you smell. whenever he’s sad he just rests his head on your stomach while you tangle you fingers in his hair. 

B=Best memory (Their favourite memory of you)

he cherishes your first kiss so much. he just has such a soft spot for that memory. the moment he finally found out you felt the same about him, the moment he finally found out what your lips against his felt like. it’s just something he had looked forward to for forever, and to him, it was perfect. 

C=Cuddles  (What type of cuddles do they like?)

sapnap is a WHORE for cuddles. if it where up to him, you two would just lay in bed all day, tangled in each other’s arms. after a long day, he just wants to hold his favourite person and fall asleep with them, so he just wraps his arms around your waist while he uses your chest as a pillow. but if he’s in a chatty mood, he’ll just talk your ears off, ranting about something he finds interesting, while you’re all snuggled up in the crook between his neck and shoulder. 

D=Dirty mind (Do they have a dirty mind?)

I mean, come on. it’s sapnap. we all know he does. he gets *excited* very easily, which can sometimes get in the way when you two are just trying to cuddle. he just has such a soft spot for your body and has to have his way with you once certain ideas have entered his mind. 

E=Effort (How much effort do they put in the relationship?)

nick would definitely try his best. honestly you don't care if his plans actually turn out the way he intented them to, it's the thought that counts. and nick knows that. but theres just something about you that makes him want to spoil you and treat you like a princess. so prepare yourself for fancy dates, him making you your favorite food, all that type of stuff.

F=First date (What was your first date together)

arcade date arcade date arcade date. sap is super competitive and I feel like he would thrive in an arcade. he would play it off like he was just trying to proof how good he was at the arcade games. but he'd just love to see how hard you would be trying to beat him. obviously he'd let you win a lot, and when he collected enough tickets, he would get you the biggest prize he could find.

G=Gentle (How gentle are they with you?)

it....depends???? lmao. nick CAN be super gentle with you, he’s pretty protective of you and would never want you to get hurt, so he’s definitely very careful not to do anything to hurt you. but sometimes his instinct just kinda takes over and well, he can get pretty rough. 

H=Hands (Do they have nice hands?)

hmmm nick has like,,very manly hands,, if you know what i mean. i dont know, they're just so rough but yet so pretty??? and they're like really big compared to yours so when he holds ur hand, yours looks so tiny in his. and omg he won't shut up about it. "LOOK AT YOUR HANDS THEY'RE SO SMALL🥺"

I=Impression (What was their first impression?)

he just thought you were so ~cool~. like he immediately knew he wanted to be your friend. he was just so in awe of how funny, chill and charismatic you were. and it literally took two days for him to develop a crush on you. his friends would notice this right away and tease him about it so much omg.

J=Jealousy (Do they get jealous often? If so what do they do?)

YUP. nick gets jealous so easy yup yup yup. jealousy, protectiveness, possessiveness, you name it. you two would often get in fights about this, but most of the time you would just think it’s cute how riled up he gets. he doesn’t get mad at you (because you’re his precious little baby and can do no wrong in his eyes :D) but god help the souls of whoever tries to flirt with you, because they’ve got a hell of a storm coming.

K=Kisses (What type of kisses do they like/give?)

god nick’s such a passionate kisser. or at least he can be lol. he loves the way your face fits into his hands, and how soft your lips are. so he definitely is a fan of just some wholesome passionate kisses. but damn this man gets sloppy when he wants to. his lips constantly trails off to your jaw, neck and collar bones.

L=Love  (Do they show their love?)

i feel like his love language would be like a mix between words of affection and physical touch??? he’s definitely very verbal with his love for you. he doesn’t shy away from saying i love you or letting you know how much he appreciates you in any other way.

M=Memory: (Their favourite memory in general?)

there are certain moments where nick just sits back, watches, and realizes how amazing his life is. and how grateful he is to have you. for example, you were playing minecraft on his pc, and your house kept getting blown up by creepers, he found it adorable how mad you got every time. he just watched you play, while sitting on his bed. after a while, you looked over at him, and caught him staring. “what?” you asked after letting out a soft chuckle. he felt like he was gonna explode from how much he loved you. 

N=Nickname  (What nicknames do they call you?)  

i’m getting very strong “baby” and “doll” vibes from nick. he loves baby-ing you and smothering you with other loving nicknames. just any petnames that show how much he loves you he’s all for. he would also love calling you “pretty” or “beautiful” for obvious reasons. 

O=Over  (What happened the one time you ‘broke up’?)

nick HATES fighting with you, but once you two get into an argument he can get pretty carried away. he’s definitely the type to let his emotions get the upper hand on him. raising his voice a lot, stuff like that. but the second you leave to get some space he just breaks down. sliding down the wall and resting his face in his hands, just letting all the emotions out. he never meant to hurt you. when you came back to him, ready to be enclosed in his arms again, he had a hard time letting you back in. he just felt like he didn’t deserve you after he treated you like this. it took some convincing, but once you broke down his walls again, it was like he gave you all the love in his body. just smothering you with “i’m sorry”s and kisses. 

P=Parents (What would they be like as a parent?)

dilfnap dilfnap dilfnap  omg he’d be such a good dad. like just very caring and loving, but also strict and stern when he needs to be. he’d constantly be telling stories to the kids about the absurd adventures him and his friends would get into, and omg the dad jokes he’d make. idk maybe it’s my daddy issues but dad sapnap lives in my mind rent free. 

Q=Quirk (Something special about them)

he loves holding your hand. especially in public. if you’re in a crowded space, he just holds onto you very tightly as not to lose you. or if you two are just going on a walk together, his hands would just feel so warm and soft around yours. and omg he loves it when his hands are in his pockets, and you put your hands in there with him, and intertwine your fingers with his. hmmm he gets so soft when you do that.

R=Romantic (How romantic are they?)

i- uh- I MEAN HE WOULD TRY he really would, and again, that’s all that matters. I feel like he would be the type to try to prepare a whole surprise dinner, he would cook all the food himself, he would set the table all cute, with candles and shit, but just completely ruin the surprise by accidentally giving it all away by saying something or just behaving very obviously suspicious. 

S=Sad (What are they like when they’re sad?)

he just gets really quiet. he would never want to bother you or be a pain in the ass by complaining to you. but obviously you notice when something is wrong with ur bby boy. a sentence like “are you okay?” or “what’s wrong?” would immediately send him over the edge, burying his face in your chest, trying his best to supress his sobs. but he eventually calms down, and once he does, he’s able to just rant to you about whatever is bothering him.

T=Together (What are they like when you’re together?)

i feel like it would really depend on his mood, like he could be either SUPER chill, just wanting to savour the time you two had together. or he could be really hyper, constantly talking, wanting to do all kinds of activities with you. he’d be the literal definition of :D

U=Understanding (How understanding and empathetic are they?)

very. i just get such empathetic vibes from him. he’s such a good listener and he’ll just listen to you talk whenever you have something to be upset about. he never invalidates your feelings and omg he’d give the best advice. 

V=Value (What do they value most about the relationship?)

he loves that he can 100% be his self around you. there’s no part of his personality that he feels like he has to hide, or tone down, whenever he’s with you. you also aspire him to be his best self, he just wants to be the best boyfriend in the world. all his friends have noticed this too, you bring out the best in him.

W=Wedding (Would they want marriage? If so what would they like?)

eh. if you’re a person who really values marriage, he’d 100% do it for you. but it’s not like he HAS to. he gets a bit scared by the idea of this whole big event, where everything is about you two, he would way rather celebrate the love you two have in the comfort of your own home, just the two of you. the one thing he would love about a wedding, would be seeing you all dolled up, walking down the aisle, omg he’d be the proudest man ever to be able to call you his.

X=X-Ray (How well can they read you?)

the SECOND you start to feel sad or depressed in any way, nick notices immediately. he knows you better than anybody else, and he knows exactly what to do to cheer you up. it’s like his superpower. if you’re feeling anxious he’ll just wrap his arms around you really tightly, holding on to you until you calm down. and when you’re sad, and in need for something to cheer you up, he’ll take you outside for a walk in the park, or he’ll just sit in bed with you, watching your favourite show. 

Y=Yuck (What they would never want in a partner)

he hates when you flirt with his friend, even when you’re very obviously joking. his jealous ass can’t deal with that lmao. he also gets super pissed when his friends make flirtatious jokes towards you, they know how much it gets on his nerves and that’s really the only reason they do it. but omg he gets so pissed when it happens. 

Zzz (How do they sleep around you?)

nick would be the cutest sleeper ever omg. he doesn’t like to admit it, but he loves being little spoon. he loves resting his head on your chest, while you play with his hair, patiently waiting for him to fall asleep. 

#sapnap #sapnap x reader #sapnap fanfic #sapnap x y/n #sapnap drabble #sapnap fluff #sapnap fluff alphabet #sapnap headcanon #sapnap headcanons #sapnap headcannon #sapnap dream smp #sapnap dsmp #sapnap dream team #sapnap angst #fluff alphabet #mcyt #mcyt x reader #mcyt fanfic #mcyt imagine #mcyt x y/n #mcyt drabble #mcyt fluff #mcyt fluff alphabet #mcyt headcanon #mcyt headcanons #mcyt headcannon #mcyt headcannons #catb0ykarl writes

[thedancefloorsilly]

I saw your post about your stress and whatnot so i don't wanna add to it, but I can't find anything about what I specifically looking for so I was going I could request it, no rush though, your mental health is more important.

So anyway, could I please have something about Kurapika falling for someone that's been friends with him since the hunter exam and always seems to know what to do or say to him when his emotions get the better of him, even if they need to use a bit of tough love, kinda like Gon and Killua's relationship.

I've only been able to find stuff where the reader is overly kind, WAY to emotional (nothing wrong with that though), or where they make Kurapika this guy that doesn't care for his S/O and basically disrespects them. I'm tired of these tropes, like c'mon, Kurapika is a respectful man that wants to avenge his family, not some neglectful man that doesn't care for others. 😒

Anyway, with my little rant out of the way, I'd really appreciate if you could write something similar to what I'm looking for. Again, no rush, your mental state should be your first priority.

Kurapika Falling for a Reader Who’s Good at Handling His Emotion’s

ah dw dw luckily im doing much better now, ty for being very considerate I rlly appreciate that, anon :) I also lovelovelove this req a lot! I dont read kurapika content, but I can def relate with the Y/N pet peeves LOL. and he would treat his s/o so right imo :(( I rlly hope these dont disappoint ﾍ(;´o｀)ﾍ

 I also included the part where y/n took the exam :)

- Of the many things Kurapika was grateful for in his life, getting the chance to meet you was one of them. Before entering the hunter exam, obtaining his license to try and take revenge on the Phantom Troupe was his only top priority. Getting the chance to make such great friends wasn’t accounted for in his initial plan, and at that, opening up his heart for the first time was something Kurapika did not expect to happen.

- Kurapika always knew from the start that you and him were going to get along well. From that moment you guys first met, an instant mutual connection could be formed between the two of you. The more you got to know each other, the more than bond strengthened with each other. Whenever he got the chance to speak to you, to vent, to rant, there was this fuzzy feeling Kurapika would always experience during those moments.

- He had a slight clue that it might’ve been love, and with that, Kurapika prayed that these feelings were only fleeting. The last thing he wanted was to distinguish them as love since he thought that he just wasn’t ready for that yet.

- As scared as Kurapika was to let those emotions blossom, there was always that strong pulse that seemed to gravitate towards you, making it almost impossible for the blonde to just ignore those feelings.

- You were probably one of the most cherished person that Kurapika knew, and acclaiming that title meant that you very important to him. Ever since the massacre, he often became hesitant when he truly found a connection with someone, in fear that one day he was eventually going to lose them. That fear that you might disappear from his life forever did always linger at the back of his mind. 

- But from the vents that Kurapika was more than comfortable enough to share with you specifically, you were always there to bring him solace. He considered you to be his rock, someone that Kurapika could always search out for on whenever those continuous feelings of sorrow came knocking at his door. During those troubled times, you had always been there for him when the times got rough.

- Through all those tears he was vulnerable enough to shed, through all of his rants and vent about the current state of his life, you were still there to listen to him with the most reassuring measures to follow. Whether it was embracing him in a long hug he really needed, or giving those comforting words encouraging him to let everything out, you were still always next to him regardless of those moments. 

- Part of him was also contemplating whether it was safe to have you so close to him because his mission might interfere with your safety. Of course, Kurapika was also very open to you about this. 

- Though you constantly reassured that you did want to help him and that no matter what you would always be there for Kurapika, part of him felt a little selfish to continue on knowing that danger would lie ahead. After all the convincing, Kurapika let you in on his mission, but would obvious warn you of all the things to come.

- As his feelings would grow over time, Kurapika would eventually plan on trying to confess to you. His deep love for you became so strong that at any moment he could just blurt out how much he loves you. Not only that, but Kurapika was almost positivity that you felt the same way. Even though he was scared of what the future would bring, he pushed past those thoughts, eventually leading up to him telling how much you mean to him, and that he truly does love and appreciate you.

#this is such a good idea for a series #AHH LONG POST #I rlly hope the title isn't misleading im not very good with titles aghhhh #hxh #hunter x hunter #kurapika #kurapika hxh #hxh kurapika #kurapika kurta #kurapika x reader #Kurapika x y/n #kurapika x you

[theredsuzuran]

Douma x reader - Innocence

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Took me a long time to upload a new content am so sorry for the delay I was really busy with school assignments therefore I cannot manage the time to write. I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors on my behalf, I hope you enjoy.

Warning : Dark themes like gore, blood and violence, degradation and swearing, mature content.

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The moon shone brightly above the sky as it's light leak through the branches illuminating the famous building of the eternal paradise cult. A new set of followers rushed into the dwelling in hopes of fulfilling their selfish desires, diminishing their agonies and enriching their possessions. However a particular human with her tattered kimono seem not to be interested to convey anything although the people around her would die to witness even a glimpse of the charismatic leader as for now she was busy running along the wide long corridors

The sound of thumping footsteps echoed throughout the building as a herd of followers attempted on catching the miscreant who disrupted the peaceful atmosphere prevailing over the supreme cult. The already annoyed and frustrated people were all worked up to catch the energetic human who on the other hand have thoughts of escaping this place they called paradise. If only she was careful enough to notice her mother's strange behavior soon as they entered the place but how can you possibly blame an innocent little girl like her, or so she thought. Afraid she might lose sight of her treacherous mother who abandoned her just moments ago she desparety stumbled her way out although that didn't concerned her simple thinking process but that's exactly how complicated the situation was.

Turning one last time to look behind if those weird people were still following her or not when suddenly she bumped into a Tall muscular figure standing infront of her soft delicate frame she must have missed him approaching while focusing on looking behind. "Please just leave me alone!" The girl fumed coherently still overwhelmed by the amount of people rushing towards her like waves something that she was not accustomed with as for eighteen years she lived indoors interacting rarely with anyone and playing with dolls most of the time.

"Watch your tongue brat" one of the men standing beside the tall man spoke with disgust hinted in his voice. "Crouch down you insolent woman, where's your gratitude it's because of lord Douma's benevolence that you are still here or you'd be rotting in the street thanks to your mother", the people around her started whispering and murmuring behind her back but she was not bother since her senses were filled with newfound wrath how dare they insult your angel like mother? No longer able to contain your anger you shouted with tears "Then take me to my mother, I don't want to stay here alone".

"Your mother abandoned you here so shut up and deal with it, now move your way for master" the man grunted irritatedly motioning the other followers to grab her and take her away.

"No don't touch me" she wiggled under their grip rushing towards douma blocking him from entering the room by grabbing his arm tightly "I am not going anywhere until I know where my mother is" she cried loudly making the demon flinch with surprise, how pitiful the creature looked in his polychromatic eyes. He have seen many humans crying before him for obvious reasons which honestly have become his monotonous routine but somehow this girl acted quite weird being her age, interesting him enough to investigate. As he was about to speak the man beside him pushed the girl hashly making her lose her balance and fall on the wooden floor.

"How dare you touch master with your filthy hands bitch" he lift his hand to slap her tight in the face but someone grabbed his wrist just in time to save the girl from further humiliation.

"Silence" all the questioning glances, judging looks and whispering stopped at once as douma spoke nonchalantly making the latter shiver in regret.

"I am sorry douma sama" the man uttered in pure horror having no intentions to displease his beloved lord. "I was-"

"I don't want to see that happen again, understood?" He replied coldly still maintaining his wide smile as the previous chaos shifted into complete hush. The man lowered his head down with shame nodding silently. Douma averted his attention and glanced at the figure underneath making the girl jolt a bit but his once frightening demeanor changed into a cheerful and optimistic one in matter of second upon seeing her.

"Please take her to my chamber and treat her wounds" the man clapped with a wide grin plastered on his face. A group of female servants came rushing to help picking her up. The girl being too bewildered did not protested and simply follow his tone as if she was hypnotized by his neatly decorated persona.

The girl was immediately taken away without delay and as per douma he needed to attend his cult duties. First of all she was washed and changed into a beautiful kimono as soon as she stepped inside, then she was escorted into a room filled with antiques and lavish items which she have never seen. Her face lit up with fascination as she began venturing those decorative pieces.

"Looks like you have ease down a bit, good good" A familiar tone struck in her ears startling her a bit only to turn back and view the handsome cult leader although it was a bit strange because she did not heard anyone approaching.

"Aww did I scared you?" He laughed covering his face with golden fans.

"No I was just- you came in without a warning, I was taken aback" she explained blushing trying her best not to act immature to which douma laughed uncontrollably as he found this human's expression adorable say entertaining in his words.

"D-dont laugh at me" she pouted crossing her arms in the attempt.

"I am sorry (y/n), you really amuse me" he replied still grinning. However there was a moment of awkward silence between them as he uttered her name abruptly.

"I didn't tell you my name.." after a long pause she replied to him with a confuse look in her face.

"I know everyone's name who are living under my supervision including yours besides what kind of cult leader I am if I don't have basic information about my fellow followers. Oh look I have been talking to you without giving the chance to let you talk my bad" he laughed again waving his fans creating another awkward situation. Causing you to sweatdrop on his remark.

"Say (y/n) how old are you?" to which she replied enthusiastically "I am 8 years old and will turn 9 soon"

"Ah you don't look like one" douma grinned closing his eyes in the process.

"Yeah I get that a lot" she remarked shyly.

"Your mother is one of my followers" he continued

"Really?" her eyes sparked with hope as she approached douma with anticipation grabbing his arms for the second time starling him, she really like holding hands eh? he have experiences like that but somehow this girl made him feel different so he allowed her but then she stopped halfway through her words "I really miss her it's been a week since she left me here" her voice dropped with sadness.

Douma felt no sympathy for humans or anything as such, he have learned to fake his emotions from a very tender age eversince he was born to the extent that even seeing his mother killing her husband mercilessly failed to evoke feelings within. He clearly did not understand what she was feeling he just stared at her with a blank expression only to replace it quickly with a grim look even faking few tears. "(Y/n) chan you know its okay you will still have me" he patted the girl in an attempt to comfort her.

"Friends?" (Y/n) replied between her tears.

"If that's how you want us to be" douma smiled at her gently shocking himself for a second because he didn't think of smiling?

Things escalated soon after that incident, (y/n) was a kind and compassionate person from inside and out and in not time the cult followers started loving her presence. As often douma would let her accompany him and most of the time she stayed by his side following him everywhere and he didn't mind that at all moreover he appreciated her company. (Y/n) was like a fresh bud to him who depicted innocence and purity he loved spoiling her with expensive gifts yet she never showed signs of greediness and genuinely appreciated his thoughtfulness slowly forgetting the past life she was in and cherishing her friendship with douma. At first she was reluctant and didn't like getting so much attention but in the course of time she bonded better with everyone and was quite content with the life she was leading. As for douma he began to depend on (y/n) to the point that not seeing her face for even one day would make him go insane and he didn't understand why not like he want to because all he cared about was how she made him feel so many varieties of pleasant emotions he wish he could feel. Eating her was out of context.

However all good things must come to an end for he is someone to not rest in peace after the sin he have committed for centuries. Seeing douma paying her more attention, spoiling her with a ravish lifestyle and even letting her stay by his side all the time made some of his cult members terribly envious they wanted to punish her for taking their chances of stealing the spotlight. There was this one room that he forbade his followers to enter for obvious reasons and specifically for (y/n) because he didn't want to repeat the same mistake. This was exactly what they wanted (y/n) to do break the rules and Douma's trust. Like that there would be no more favouritism on her with others.

"Ah (y/n), there you are" one of the female member approached her one fine morning.

"Yes how may I help you?" She asked cheerfully

"Lord douma have asked for your presence in the forbidden room tonight and he said its urgent"

"Aren't we all prohibited to go inside"

"Oh (y/n) it's true master have arrived today and he wants your presence"

Upon hearing that news her heart elated with happiness, it has been two weeks since he last saw douma around and she missed him but something felt off about the whole situation douma always sees (y/n) first before tending his followers then why did he not come meet her did he not miss her like she did?

She was lost in her thoughts until she found two hands waving and snapping infort of her face.

"Don't be late, okay?" With that said the female hurried back into other room leaving (y/n) behind even though the situation seem kinda odd maybe douma was busy afterall.

At night (y/n) went into the restricted area. She stood infront of the shoji door in absolute dilemma debating whether or not to enter the room or go back. There was her desire of meeting douma on one hand and not breaking his trust by entering the room on the other. In the end she decided not to but as she was turning back she heard someone grunting in pain behind the closed doors being a compassionate person, she decided to open the door and enter into the darkness adjusting her eyes in the process, a pungent smell hit her nostrils making her cover her mouth and to her absolute terror the scene infront of her made her puke in disgust.

A pile of Mutilated bodies, mostly women laid around lifelessly on the blood stained tatami mattress. Many having no limbs, some headless and organs missing from their body as if someone had ate all of that. The whole room was a mess full of unfortunate people. She felt sick and began crawling down her way back from the corpses. However she felt a tight grip on her left foot upon looking down she witness the sight of a woman her intestines oozing out of her stomach begging for help. (Y/n) stood there perplexed unable to say anything chocking through tears.

"I told you not to come here, why?" (Y/n) turned her head violently to see douma standing in a distance his countenance cold and sinister evident that he was highly displeased upon seeing his innocent flower disobeying his instructions.

"It's not... like... what you see" (y/n) cried fearfully but douma didn't seem to buy it well in a blink of an eye she found herself in Douma's arms as he aggressively dragged her out of the room.

"What's going on douma" no word came out from the usual lively douma.

"It's hurting me your grip" no reply again to which she forcefully tried to stand still with all her strength. This time douma stopped his features hidden under his bangs making her unable to figure the expression he was carrying.

"Is this why douma forbade us to enter the room" no reply

"Are you responsible for murdering those innocent people?" No reply

"DOUMA" she shouted

"Why you want to join them?" Douma finally looked at her his eyes glowing dangerously proving his existence to be something unnatural. (Y/n's) eyes widen at his remarks as tears rolled down her visage.

"I hate you.." she murmured

"What?" He tilted his head letting his guard down a bit at her hurtful comments.

"I HATE YOU" she pushed douma roughly and flew from the place running deep into the forest for she knew who he was and what he is capable of doing. Tearing down she constantly reminisce the moments she shared but she cannot allow herself to sympathize his heinous crimes. Why is it that the people I love are always taken away from me? She thought. Exhausted from running she halted in order to catch her breath while glancing back to see if he was following, there was no one indeed so a sudden feeling of relief gushed in her body. However turning her head back she saw him standing inches apart from her face which made her shiver and fall onto the knees.

"Why are you running away from me (y/n)" he said apatheticly his head lowered at her level. She did not reply and stayed quite.

"Is it true that you don't love me after all the things I did for you?" Covering his face with one hand his eyes glowing under the moonlight a look of dejection written on his face. There was complete silence in the forest except the sound of rustling trees.

"Answer me" holding her face now firmly he growled making her flinch under his breath. In one last desperate attempt (y/n) tried to stab douma with a tree branch she found laying on the ground but unfortunately douma was faster and easily dodged the attack and in a swift motion he hit her with immense strength causing her fragile little body to tremble in pain as she coughed mucus mixed with blood.

"How foolish of you" he crouched down her height staring intensely at the quivering figure of the miserable girl. As for (y/n) her body ached but more was the tightness in the chest that she was experiencing in the moment.

He pulled her by the hair roughly making her scream in pain although at this point all she could manage with her cracking voice were inaudible screams.

"Why did you disobey me? (Y/n)..." who knew beneath that friendly kind face was hiding a undeniably deadly and calculative demon and at this point it was clear for her that he was anything but human.

"Who are you?" these few words manage to escape from her shaky lips in between low grunts.

"I am the leader of the eternal paradise cult"

"Wrong" to which he tightened his grip making her shriek again.

"You humans are so dumb believing in the existence of primordial deities where in reality its just a myth, a fairytale, created for pleasuring the sufferings of mere human. Being superior than you mortals I wanted to make these pitiful existence happy and that's why I was born and what you saw there" his lips curved into a cheeky smile revealing his deadly fangs creeping the shit out of the already scared girl. "I eat them so that they can always be with me and attain salvation" a sinister laughter escape from his mouth as he covered it with his golden fans. (Y/n) unable to process the new sets of information knots formed in her stomach making her sick in the guts.

"I ate your mother too, oh she was ungrateful after all the things I did to her just like you" protruding her eyes with pure shock she felt her veins popping out and blood boiling in pure rage.

"You are a monster, you think your stupid morals would persuade people to think like you do, I despise you douma I thought we were friends and you took away the one I cherished the most?"

"You think your mother loved you?" Douma snapped. The duality of this was man was insane, all the things he does or says are plastic.

"She never cared for your life, you want to know why? I will tell you since you insist" douma dragged her out of forest holding a fistful of her hair tightly inflicting great discomfort to the girl while he continued with his harsh statements and deliberate insults.

"You were just a burden, behaving like a fucking child with the alluring body of yours"

"No my mother promised me..she would protect me.. you are lying"

"While you were crying everyday inside my shrine that lowly woman enjoyed her life indulging in adultery with various cult members leaving her sick husband and mentally retarded daughter in the dark" every word he uttered spread vemon into her ears.

"Still she wanted more and more and more, what a greedy whore" douma continued.

"Do you know how much difficult it was for me to control myself around you? While you sway your hips and act innocently making those hungry men lust over you, how much dumb can you be?"

"What do you mean I don't understand.. douma"

"I did everything I can for you yet you remain ungrateful, disrespectful? Well guess its runs in your blood and I thought you are innocent but it turns out that you are just like the rest of them, naive"

Her eyes widened with every hurtful remarks he made about her and she did not understand why she felt that way shouldn't she be resentful towards him for killing her beloved mother but here she is weeping constantly because douma was treating her like he never did before.

"But that's fine (y/n) I can not bring myself to hurt you I love you and we shall always be together whether you like it or not" nothing reached in her ears anymore as her body grew numb. Her eyes shut as she carried the unbearable pain in her heart slowly loosing consciousness and remaining sanity.

It would have been easier if she died but alas a mere human like her is doomed at his mercy.

#douma #douma kny #douma x reader #kny x reader #kny douma #demon slayer #fanfic #kimetsu no yaiba #upper moons #upper moon 2

[genshinboys]

Hey dear 😊🌸

So I just saw someone asked you which male genshin character you'd ship them with if you knew their zodiac sign and mbti. So I thought you'd maybe do that for me as well? I'd you don't want to that's fine!🙈

I'm a november scorpio and pretty much exactly how you'd imagine it. My mbti is ISFJ-T

As for my personality: I'm super witty/flirty with my s/o. I love nature and whenever I see a cat I take my time to pet it! I also just left the house to collect dandelion for my turtle at the graveyard so I'm v soft for animals in general (not a dog person though). I also bring home bees when I see them on the ground to give them sugar water (I used to bring it with me all the time).

I'm organized and I like to stick to a plan rather than being thrown out in the unknown. But maybe that's something I should dare more often? I work alone and take care of paperwork. I like being all by myself a lot it's calming and helps me to de-stress. So I guess I could need someone more adventurous that would put me out there and challenge me?

I'm into dark academia/light academia. I love psychology as you know. Books are my favorite. Personally feel the most drawn to Inazuma. My fav seasons would be autumn and winter, I actually like being cold. My test results said I'd have a cryo vision which isn't surprising, hehe.

On the other hand I'm insecure and tend to get jealous because of that. I went through a lot of trauma and need a partner that will make sure to calm me down and take care of me and listen properly. Depression hits at least once a day so someone that's able to cheer me up with their humor or calm side would be awesome. I come off as a cold ass, but I can be very soft if you get to know me better, cliché scorpio.

Thank you so much and dont forget to drink the clear sauce and have a rest! Don't forget you dont have to do this!!!💕

HELLO PRINCESS 😘

It was a difficult one, ngl

I would ship you with Kazuha. He, just like you, has very close connection with nature and he would be more than happy to drag you with him for all sorts of tiny trips or even bigger adventures! I know you're the home body type and you prefer being alone but he will take you out of your shell while respecting your boundaries. You'll not feel that he is forcing you to do anything, quite to the contrary, his mellow and sensitive nature causes that you actually want to accompany him because it is all so new and therefore exciting. He fascinates you and you're drawn to him like a magnet.

Kazuha, being very observant, knows when to leave you alone to your thoughts, to let you think and recharge your batteries. He, more than anyone realises the importance of self-introspection. However, he won't let you sulk in the corner for too long, expect him to come and surprise you with a soft peck on the cheek and a sweetly murmured haiku that he has just written for you 💕

He is very romantic and dedicated. Kazuha won't let you feel jealous, always ready to prove his feelings for you by the smallest of things, but how meaningful. He can be cheesy sometimes but well, isn't that part of his charm? 🤭 Let him recite these poems for you, hold your hand while he takes you out for one of your walks around Kazuha's homeland, kisses you breathless under the shadow of the sakura tree when you least expect it.

You need his spontaneous nature and child-like curiosity that will open your eyes to new possibilities but also will very often put a smile to your face. Depression with Kazuha? I don't think that's entirely possible. This short man is the walking image of posititivity, calmness, stoicism and he always tries to see the bright side of things that have happened to him, even though it might have been awful. He will listen to your problems, good and bad stories from the past, will let you vent and you will find yourself pouring your heart out for this caring and loving man. Kazuha will always offer a word of advice that you will cherish and remember.

Intimacy between you two? ❤️ Oh, dear me. *blushes hard* 🤭 you two can be quite intense, no? ❤️ Kazuha will love your flirtatious advances and let me just tell you that he will be exceptionally responsive to whatever you do or say. Although he might appear innocent he definitely isn't lol 😂 he will be a passionate lover, not afraid to explore your sexuality and ready to satisfy all of your needs. The chemistry between you two is just through the roof *fans myself* honestly, what are you waiting for???? Go and collect your man 🤭

[nagitolovebug]

How would(does?) Izuru react to the twins that Nagito and Hajime had together? Would be love them just the same? Also, could we hear more about Juliet, the ballerina and antagonist of the killing game?

(does! izuru and hajime share a body- they're not a system bc I don't think that's how DID works and as someone who's not a system i'm not gonna hc that as it's not my place...izuru is just kinda there (maybe more like sukuna/itadori, naruto/kurama type shit)..how he's perceived by the remnants/how he views his situation with hajime is touched on here https://archiveofourown.org/works/32147236 (though this isn't bebiverse just general izuru introspection but my thoughts on him and hajizuru and general stay more or less the same in this au lol))

izuru is present less often than hajime, for one because at first he makes the rest of the remnants very uncomfortable (he's hajime's 'remnant' self after all) and for another it's a lot for him. it's dull and he gets tired and annoyed very easily, he'd rather stay the whole day in the cabin with nagito and bebi but knows the likelihood of that happening is slim to none. he really only tolerates his family. so on one of izuru's hiatuses, nagito Finds Out.

nagito wakes up one day to his partner (he can finally say partner- it took nagito getting pregnant for hajime to propose- realizing he didn't want what they had with anyone else ever. nagito had no idea they were even dating. he was so confused.. "I..I dont understand..why are you doing this? is it because of the baby? I know you're traditional, hinata-kun, but there's really no need.." and hajime smiles and kisses him. "I love you. I'll tell you as many times as you need. until you believe it. I want to marry you. because I love you. he said yes.) staring at him, unblinking.

"izuru?"

his face barely changed but nagito could tell he was pleased. it always made izuru happy when nagito could tell the difference between him and hajime every time without fail.

nagito was still half awake, choosing to not question where his fiancé (hajime and izuru proposed to nagito separately..) had gone and instead snuggling closer to izuru. izuru doesn't stop his clearly analytical staring, but strokes nagito's hair and tucks him under his chin nonetheless.

"you look different. your skin has a dewy and delicate sheen and your weight has fluctuated slightly. you're more conscious of your stomach when positioning yourself. what happened. while I was gone."

nagito frowns. "hajime said you knew..."

"knew what? what did he do?"

nagito pouts at him, pulling his hair slightly. "be nice to him." he looks pensive for a moment.

"I...I'm pregnant."

izuru's eyes widen marginally. his hold on nagito tightens slightly.

"izuru?"

izuru only noses at nagito's neck in response, small pecks pressed to the skin. it was his favorite form of affection.

"i am displeased hajime has kept this from me for so long, yet cannot deny the.....joy i feel. knowing another little one has found their way into our lives." he kisses nagito's cheek.

"really? do you mean that? that you're happy? you're not mad?"

izuru frowns at him, nipping at his neck.

"i am overjoyed. you and bebi have introduced to me a life worth living, quelled my boredom by continually surprising me, shown me how to...love. i cherish you both more than anything, and will cherish our new child equally. you are mine, nagito, for life. as i am yours. there is nothing that could ever change that."

izuru really is very excited, being able to truly spend time with nagito now during his pregnancy without having to worry about survival, or food, or supplies, or enemies. he can dote on his partner as freely as he chooses. and the unpredictability of the entire process keeps him interested. he doesn't think of the twins as not his own (because they really aren't; hajime is the only one who struggles with that with bebi bc of his own identity struggles- identity struggles izuru lacks). his only issue with them comes far later, when they're grown, and find out about the NWP and despair.

as for juliette, she hasn't been developed terribly aside from her relationship with kiko. she's vindictive, and cold, and makes it clear she is uninterested in cooperating with anyone from the start of the killing game. she asserts many times that she is unafraid of killing anyone, and implies that she is planning to do so. that she'll do anything to get out. kiko, being kiko, antagonizes her repeatedly, goading, teasing, generally trying to provoke juliette and they have...a rivalry of sorts? kiko is entirely unafraid of her, despite the threats, whereas juliette hates her (says if she's gonna kill anyone, it'll be kiko. lol). they do end up in a confrontation where juliette almost kills kiko in front of everyone ("I'll slash your throat" "not like that you won't. you aren't even holding the knife right, princess. I'll show you." n kiko adjusts juliette's grip and forces the knife to her own throat. "well? what are you waiting for?" she yanks her hand from kikos. "you're insane." "you're a liar.")

what ends up happening is juliette does go through with a plan to kill kiko. she breaks into her room in the middle of the night with a knife. kiko wakes up to strawberry blonde ringlets in her face, a masked figure holding a knife to her throat. her hand is shaking.

"and here I thought we were finally friends-"

"shut up. don't make this harder than it needs to be."

"for all your talk, I didn't think you had it in you. is the golden girl really gonna dirty her hands with my blood? filthy and beneath you, right? whatever's waiting back home must really be worth it."

"stop! stop talking!"

"just.. do it already." and kiko grabs her hand again, pushing the knife into her skin. "i'm glad it was me. this way, you're not a monster. i hope it's worth it. you won't make it out. my brother...he's stronger than all of you. he'll win. but if it's me, at least, they can all move on. haru will only get angrier, and my death will help him get out of here. .....and for what it's worth. i'm glad it was you."

and juliette ends up stabbing the knife through the pillow right next to kiko's head and collapsing on her, sobbing. they're closer from there on out, but how close....

i'll try and think up lore for her if anyone's interested😅

#cw tokophobia #cw trans male pregnancy #kamukoma #komahina #bebi kamukura #haruki hinata #kiko hinata #anon #asks

[like-rain-or-confetti]

Nightlights Part 3 FINAL (Demetri Volturi x child!Reader)

@kpopgirlbtssvt​  --whilst i dont do tag lists i do gotta tag this one I’d recommend Nightlights part 1 & 2 to catch the references throughout this one but there is no necessity!

It wasn't often the whole Volturi gathered together but for your final birthday, they most certainly would. Birthdays weren't usually a thing for the Volturi so it took a little more brain power to think about it. They decided that in the evening they'd have a get together. Demetri had asked if you had any requests and to his surprise, you only had one. A very simple one. A birthday cake. He'd even pressed you about it. Reminding you, you can ask for more- but you never did. You claimed if everyone was there, having a good time then you'd be happy. Demetri could have melted, you were more concerned about everyone else on your birthday rather than yourself. You were beyond pleased when you discovered the wives would be there, your grandmother's. 

Athenodora was more excited than any of them. Caius couldn't help but find it bittersweet. Athenodora would have loved children of her own with Caius but it could never be. Having you in the castle was the closest thing she'd have to a child. You truly were a blessing even in Caius' eyes. He couldn't deny it when he saw his wife with you as you grew up. He just hoped you didn't act as a reminder of what she couldn't have too. 

However Demetri approached the two with an offer that would have flooded Athenodora with tears. He wore a soft smile. He asked if Athenodora would like to bring the cake to you. It was very often that parents did such a thing so both Caius and Athenodora was surprised by the offer. "You gave (Y/N) a lot of your time, Ma'am." Demetri explained. "It's not much to express my gratitude but...it's a start." Slowly Athenodora moved to stand in front of Demetri. Overcome with emotions and tears she'd never shed. To Demetri's surprise she hugged him. Demetri looked to Caius who nodded, with a surprisingly soft expression. Demetri gently hugged her back with one hand, keeping the other behind his back as always. "I'd be honored." She said quietly, barely managing to speak. "That child means the world to me. I cherish every second I've had with them over the years. You don't know how much this means to me, Demetri." Demetri couldn't help but get emotional himself remembering his first child he lost and the feeling he had when you called him your father. Every second with you felt like a gift that had already been ripped away once. "I think I might have a inkling." He responded quietly and Athenodora squeezed him tighter. It seemed that not even Caius was immune to the emotion but he did a very good job at masking it. "Heaven's, all because of a cake." Demetri smiled and Athenodora laughed quietly, pulling away. "It is rather silly, but thank you." She said again. "You're more than welcome, ma'am." 

Once Demetri left, Athenodora turned to Caius with a heartfelt smile. "I wasn't expecting that. What a wonderful surprise." Athenodora moved into her husband's arms who kissed her forehead. "I shouldn't be as surprised." He admitted and Athenodora looked up at him questioningly. Caius' voice was quiet. "Demetri spoke to me privately some time ago, about (Y/N)." Athenodora tilted her head slightly, her silence motioning for him to continue. "He ask if we...if something were to ever happen to him, take over as (Y/N)'s parents." Athenodora would have melted to the floor if it weren't for her husband's strong hold. "What did you say?" She asked quietly and Caius simply looked at her, searching her eyes. "Of course we would." She said quietly. "That child is family, we'd all take care of them no matter what. They're the closest I--" Athenodora swallowed hard, her eyes falling from Caius face. Caius' finger lightly tilted her chin up, making her meet his gaze again. "I know." He said quietly, so only she'd hear. "That's why I agreed. However I also told him I don't doubt that Demetri will be around for a very long time. I think he's just worrying." "Probably, but he can be at ease knowing there isn't one person in this castle who wouldn't look after them." Her expression darkened. "We'd kill anyone who didn't." 

"Are you ready to dance!?" Felix bellowed waltzing with himself. The twins eyes widened in alarm at his outburst and Heidi quickly tried to cover her laugh with her hand. "No!" You cried back in horror. "I dont dance! I flail helplessly like a fish out of water until someone puts me out of my misery!" "Lies!" Felix declared. "I'll have you know you were a wonderful dancer when you were seven!" You groaned into your hands, remembering what he was talking about.  To this day, Felix was reminded of your younger self. He couldn't help but smile at the memories. 

You grinned in a particular way that the Volturi had caught on to be a silent laugh, you didn't always audibly laugh but the smile alone was progress. You had said small words or phrases but you still had the occasion where you'd break out of your silence for some time. "Are you ready?" Felix grinned. You hurriedly turned your back to him, crossing your arms over before taking Felix's. "Good job." He chuckled, bending slightly to your height. "And feet together!" Felix grinned. "Yes, honey, you need to have your feet together!" Heidi smiled warmly. "Do you remember what this is called?" You grinned at Heidi. "What is it called, darling?" Demetri asked with a warm smile. "It's the funny word." Heidi smiled taking a seat beside Demetri. "Dip!" You said loudly. "Yes, well done sweetheart!" Heidi said as the others in the room praised you as they always did for speaking. "One...two...three...dip!" Felix tipped you and giggled. Demetri tilted his head at you with a warm smile. 

"Now it's Heidi's turn " Felix wiggled his eyebrows as you rushed into your father's arms. Heidi sighed with a smile before standing up. "Just to show the children, how it's done." She smirked her eyes meeting with the twins and other members of the guard. You had seen Felix do it to Heidi before and you were hooked ever since, wanting him to do it to you.  Funnily enough, your dips looked like Felix flailing for side to side since your were so young. Heidi mimicked her arm movement the same way you did as Felix quietly asked her if he was ready. Heidi nodded simply before she was dipped side by side. 

As Felix continued to dance with the air, when there was a knock on the door. Felix -not so gracefully- flopped onto the bed. Eyes shut. Marcus opened the door, inspecting the room. "Such joy in here." There was a ghost of a smile on his face. "Master, (Y/N) won't dance with me!" Felix whined. "They're saving their dances for this evening." Marcus smirked slightly at you and you frantically shook your head. "Unfortunately, I must borrow young (Y/N) if we don't mind." Marcus asked. "Take them! They've shattered my heart. I'll never dance again!" Felix said dramatically as you hopped off your bed and moved towards Marcus. 

 "My apologies, it seems I sought you out at a bad time." Marcus said, you caught onto the barely evident humour. You were used to that with Marcus. He did his best with you and only later on did you really find out why he was sad most of the time. "I'd say it was a perfect time." You said with a smile. You caught the ghost of a smile on Marcus' face. "Might I also wish you happy birthday. You grow so quickly." You smiled. "It's a human thing." Marcus let out a quiet hum of amusement.  He led you to his room. 

You rarely saw Aro, Marcus or Caius' rooms. There was a couple of times you were in Caius' room but that was with Athenodora and that she couldn't leave. "Aro and I were talking a short time ago." Marcus began once you entered his room to your surprise you found Aro, Caius, Sulpicia and Athenodora standing inside and waiting for you along with Demetri. "We decided a gift was in order. After some thought, we knew what we wanted to give you and informed your father." You spared your father a glance who simply stared back at you, a hand behind his back. "You mean so much to us, sweetheart." Athenodora spoke up gently. "We can't help but remember that there is someone who would have loved you just as much as we do. Someone who never got the chance to meet you.” You stood still and quiet. Aro continued Athenodora’s words with his own, as he stood by Marcus. “Marcus and I can both agree that it’s only right that we share a piece of her with you...”  “Because you remind us of her everyday with that lovely smile of yourself and the life you’ve brought into this castle.” Marcus finished, before turning towards his desk. 

You felt tears welling up in your eyes as it hit you just who they were speaking of. The grandmother you never got to meet, the woman that took a piece of Marcus with her when she died. Didyme. You were told she could make people unbelievably happy and to hear you even reminded them of her, the realisation made a tear run down your face. Athenodora broke into a soft smile. Marcus turned around with something small in his hand.  “Take care of it, because once it was hers... and now it’s yours.” Carefully, Marcus placed a brooch, a very expensive one at that in your hand. It was gold, heavy with three large amethyst stones that were surrounded by smaller diamonds. Another tear ran down your face as you looked up at the coven. The scene reminding you that they were a family and to gift you this, they considered you family, or close enough to give you something of their passed away loved one. Something personal and sentimental to them. Your mouth opened but what felt at the worst possible time, nothing came out. You tried again and nothing.  “It’s alright, darling.” Athenodora smiled. “We know.” You looked down at the brooch with a sad smile.  “Grandma.” You mouthed, a whisper of the word. Athenodora, overcome with emotion covered her mouth, leaning into Caius who stood behind her.  “You’re sure?” You managed out a croaked whisper, looking to Marcus.  “Yes.” Marcus assured you.  “I...feel like i should hug you.” You said quietly, coherent sentences finally escaping you. A soft smile grew on Marcus’ face.  “Come here then.” Marcus said as he stepped forward, giving you a gentle hug. 

Seeing the Volturi gathered together was rare, but so were happy moments. However that’s all it was, a moment because it wasn’t an ending, not to them. It was the end of a chapter. It was a reminder of why the vampires had to keep secret. To keep sacred moments like this for themselves, away from the outside forces. Where vampires could create their forever and their happy endings that many of them weren’t given from birth or death.  As Alec twirled you and Jane with both arms, a smile dawned on his face. He thought about how the human world wasn't kind to him. It had already decided that he and his sister didn't have a place in the world before they had even been born. The human in him died the night the fire would consume him, his sister the same. Yet the vampire world allowed he and his sister moments like this. Which just as for many others in the room, proved to be a reminder why the Volturi did what they did.  For tonight, the twins didn’t have to be guards, they didn’t have to be the witch twins, for tonight they could be Jane and Alec. 

“I can’t dance!” You whined with a smile.  “It’s not difficult, i promise. Nothing too complicated.” Demetri smiled slightly, pulling you into the crowd of dancing vampires. As the two of you swayed, you couldn’t help but enjoy it. It was oddly calming. It was clear to see Demetri couldn’t be happier. Neither noticed that Heidi had caught the sight. With a smile, she raised her phone recoding the scene before her. “I’ve been wanting to thank you.” You said finally.  “For what?” Demetri asked.  "You gave me so much." You said after a moment. Demetri’s response was instant. "You gave me much more." Demetri knew you’d never understand to what extent he meant that. You allowed him to be a father again, a privilege he had lost and never gotten the opportunity to remember. Now he had another child, who he loved more than anything in the world and he got to remember and cherish every second. Some are very lucky to be a parent once but to be a parent twice, that was special to Demetri- a miracle.  Even as you stood before him complete opposite to the little one he rescued prior. He could see glimpses of that little one.    It was strange at the very least, for humans you had been around for fifteen years and for vampires, that was no time at all.  Demetri looked at you and he could see the child, no older than six who hadn't dared speak a word. He twirled you and remembered the silent laughter that turned into quiet giggles which soon turned into real laughter as time went on. He pictured that child in front of him and before meeting their eyes, once again you were older and wore a beautiful smile on your face.  “I was so lucky to be your father...after everything. I’m so lucky to have you as my child.” You tilted your head slightly a small hum of amusement escaping you. “I think i’m the lucky one, dad. Don’t you know why?”  “Why?” Demetri asked, playing along.  You grinned at him stopping momentarily. "Because my dad is a superhero." Demetri’s heart melted, remembering the conversation you had with Heidi all those years ago. He kissed your forehead before emotions could overcome him. 

At the end of the night, Athenodora moved towards you with a smile holding a cake in her hands. You grinned at Demetri who sat beside you, a chorus of happy birthday blaring in your ears. Once the song was over, they waited for you to blow out the candles.  “Make a wish!” Athenodora grinned. You thought for a moment with a smile before blowing out the candles. Clapping erupted and Demetri pulled you into him to kiss your forehead. “Happy Birthday, sweetheart.”

Heidi smiled when she saw Demetri sitting alone on the sofa later than night when things were dying down. She knew Demetri well. He'd hadn't acknowledged her mostly because he was so deep in thought he hadn't noticed her. She knew what had his attention. You did, even when not in the room. You were always on Demetri's mind. Demetri was reminiscing and so Heidi thought there was no better time to show him the video than the present. "Don't tell me you're moping now. It was a good time." Heidi grinned sitting beside him. Demetri cast her a glance with an amused smile. "Not moping. Just thinking, reminiscing perhaps." "They're not gone, you act like you may lose them." Heidi responded to Demetri, a little more seriously this time but keeping the mood light. "It feels like that slightly. It feels like I lost the little one I found hiding under a table and that I spent countless hours in attempt to get them to speak.” Heidi hummed slightly. "Well, allow me to put you mind at ease." Demetri turned his head to look at Heidi who smiled at him warmly. "That child is still here, a little older yes, but here. They're heading to their room right now, happy as can be. Deep down, the child you rescued is still in (Y/N). It's the same person and they want the same as they wanted back then. It's what every child wants really." Heidi said. "What's that?" Demetri said quietly. "To make their parents proud." Heidi said simply with a smile. Demetri's face melted into a heartfelt smile. His emotions rising. "They make me more proud every day. I just think about how lucky I've been to have them." Heidi wrapped an arm around Demetri's shoulder however still keeping distance between them. "Children are gifts." Heidi agreed. "However I feel I must remind you, again, that you're not losing them. They'll be changed soon and their survival chances are high with us. You'll have one year where you'll want to rip your hair out because you have a teenage newborn-" Demetri chuckled and Heidi continued. "Then you'll have eternity with them. Your baby." Heidi whispered the last part. "I watched that little one grow up and I watched how becoming a father changed you. It was beautiful. A privilege. It doesn't end here. They'll still need you and you'll always be their father." After a moment Heidi looked at her phone, shifting closer to Demetri. "Look at this. You'll like it." Demetri leaned into Heidi's shoulder to get a look at the screen and Heidi rested her head on top of his. She hit play. Demetri inhaled sharply and stiffened as he saw the very moment he thought he'd never get back. A memory he treasured and hoped that you'd remember. The two of you dancing. Demetri smiling down at you as grinned up at him. Demetri smiled when he saw that Heidi had captured all of it, as he watched himself twirl you. The same moment he thought back to the much younger you.  "We're going to keep this, make copies and from this day on. You'll have this. I don't care what we have to do to keep it. We're doing it. Forever." 

 "Hey, can I show you something?" You grinned at Alec after he walked you to your room. He made a face as though pretending he was reluctant. He hummed in 'thought'. "I'm not sure, I might blind myself before you get the chance." "Alec!" You whined but laughed none the less. "You can't even use your gift on yourself!" "I might! You don't know if I've ever tried." Alec replied. You took his hand, tugging slightly. "Please!" "Of course you can show me, go on then." Alec smirked. He let you pull him into your room. "So look what I found." You dug into your desk drawer and pulled out something that fit your hand perfectly. Alec was quick to recognize it was your old nightlight. The one you had been given when afraid of the dark. "You're old nightlight?" Alec said in surprise. "I haven't seen that in a while... it’s definitely been a few years." You nodded in agreement. "I found it in my storage boxes. I didn't realize I still had it after all this time but I couldn't bring myself to get rid of it." Alec hummed with an amused smile. "Well it was a companion to get you through the nights." "He says like it ever affected him when I was afraid of the dark." You smirked. "You'd scream every night as though being brutally murdered. Believe me. We were all relieved that you got that thing and we still had our hearing intact." "Oh haha!" You said sarcastically. "Anyway, it gave me an idea. Heidi helped me out but I think you're the first to see it." "Oh the surprise continues, I thought that was it." Alec said. "I'm too old for a nightlight, but I miss it. This was the next best thing." You said as you moved to a switch that was connected to...something. Alec wasn't entirely sure what it was. 

When you flicked the switch the room lit up. Alec was taken aback. Along your ceiling was a galaxy. A mixture of soft purples, pinks and blues which mixed in with the darkness of the room perfectly. Scattered along the ceiling is specks of white that was clearly replicating stars, it did a good job at it too. Seeing technology coming so far along for anyone in the Volturi always took them by surprise. "It's beautiful." Alec said quietly. "Get on my bed." You said and Alec raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me, little human?" Alec smirked. "Are you trying to tell me something?" "Shut up, not like that." You laughed. "Let me tell you, in all my years one thing has remained the same. You can't just demand someone onto your bed without it seemingly a little...forward. You’re also too young and so am I so-" You cut Alec off, who couldn’t help but laugh. "Alec!" You said exasperated. "You know, I didn't mean it like that!" Alec snickered. "Still amusing, little human. I suppose I can comply though, only because I'm intrigued by the that thing." Alec nodded to the unfamiliar object the switch was connected to. He moved the the opposite side of your bed and you lay down beside him. "Ready?" You asked. "Mmhmm." He mumbled. You smiled as you dug your hand down the side of your bed. 

In seconds fairy lights lit up the headboard of your bed. Alec's eyes immediately moved to the source of light before chuckling. "All of that build up for that?" "You made that build up by making it weird!" You shot back.  "Because how many times have we told you to rethink your words!" Alec laughed. "I don't know where you got that from." You groaned. "I try!" "I know you do, I know you try. It's just funny to torment you with it." You glared at him as he continued. "In all seriousness, it's beautiful and Caius will be the first to say that after nine years, you've finally cleaned your room." Alec smirked and you pouted. "I'm not that messy." "So that's what you've been telling yourself all these years." Alec mused and you huffed. "Has Demetri seen this yet?" "No. You're the only one so far." "Well it's safe to say you really like stars." Alec began. "Your nightlight was stars too." "I love stars." You replied. "Can't even say I know why. I wonder if it's because it was the first thing you guys ever gave me was that nightlight." Alec turned to face you with a genuine small smile. "It's so strange." He said to himself. "What is?" You asked. "Nine years ago, when we first met, I carried you on my hip and distracted you when saving you. Now you're as big as me. It's been no time at all...for me." "Yeah, now we're the same height." You smirked. "Although you could still carry me with one arm and all that." "I could but I wouldn't." Alec chuckled. "That'd be so uncomfortable." You laughed. “I can just see it now. ‘Hey guys, I've arrived. By the way, i brought my human friend.” "It was fine back then when you had smaller limbs. Now...?" Alec trailed off, shaking his head. You giggled. "You've come very far, little human." Alec smiled gently turning to look at you. "It feels like only yesterday we couldn't get a word out of you." You smiled lightly. "I'm trying." "You're doing really well." Alec praised you. "You're very good at holding conversations." "I feel safe.with you guys." You admitted. "It's easier." "I'm glad." Alec offered you a soft smile. "It's still difficult sometimes though." You said quietly. "You're allowed your quiet days." Alec reminded you. "But what if when I'm changed...I go back to being quiet all the time?" You asked quietly. "Then you embrace it." Alec reassured you. "Even if you go back to not saying a word, we'll help you all over again." "Is it weird if I said you're my best friend?" You said finally. Alec's face twisted into dismay. "Do I have to be? Can't I be the cool uncle or something? Physically we’re...possibly similar ages but im literally thousands of years older than you."  "But Felix is the cool uncle, so is Santiago- and Uncle Afton! I don't see him as much though." You decided not to point you that mentally he was not older. In fact sometimes he could be younger. "I'm so much better and older than all three of them." Alec grumbled. "Uhmmm well the grandfather roles have already been taken by Aro, Caius and Marcus." "I am not being a grandfather to anyone." Alec said, his eyes widening. "I suppose I can afford to have a human as my best friend... Temporarily human." He sighed with a smile. Your gaze snapped to his with shock. "I'm your best friend!?" Alec thought about it. "I suppose so. You're the next person I care about the most after Jane. So you could be correct. I wouldn't know. I haven't had one before." You burst out into a grin. "Stop that." Alec said quickly. "What?" You asked. "Smiling, stop it." Alec said quickly. "But-" "-and if you tell anyone I'll deny it." Alec said flatly. You tried to wipe the smile from your face. Alec wasn't a very vulnerable person and he hated being this open with someone. However, knowing that you were his best friend, you couldn't fight back your smile. 

Out of nowhere, Alec took the pillow under his head and pushed it down. You screeched but couldn't help but laugh before your voice was muffled. "Stop smiling!" Alec pressed before removing the pillow. "I will smother you." He said, turning his back to you. You barely caught his own small smile.

#twilight #volturi #the volturi #child!reader #one shot #oneshot #part 3 #demetri volturi

[darkurgediary]

Two Worlds, Two Hearts: Chapter One

Summary: Fifteen Years have gone by since Sarah ran the Labyrinth, struggling to cope, she starts painting. Little does she know her world is going to be turned upside down again.

Warning(s): I dont think there’s any this chapter, if I missed something please let me know!

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Memory moved the brush across the canvas, as it often did when Sarah got into her paints. Because she realized it all hadn’t been a dream. Fifteen years ago she really did wish Toby away to the Goblins. And they’d come for him. Since that day she carried a certain knowledge, the truth. Truth that fairies, goblins, and other creatures thought to be myth were anything but.

It filled her with terror and wonder all the same. 

Her venture through the Underground hung vivid in her mind. As pale-green eyes studied the canvas the distant call of birds and other creatures swept her away, she still remembered the crunch of leaves beneath her feet as she followed Ludo and Sir Didymus through the enchanted forest. Moments before disaster struck when Hoggle gave her the peach. Sarah managed to capture the very moment in her painting, the way rays of light slipped through the branches of tall trees. Leaves of vivid green and brown, along with a certain shimmer down twisted bark. 

Before the labyrinth Sarah would have given anything to live in a world like the fairytales she so dearly loved in her youth, to be like Alice or Dorothy. Then it happened. Her world turned upside down when the Goblins came, because they brought with them a lesson. Not all fairytales were puppy-dogs and rainbows. The hardships heroes face were the very things that made them heroes. One might have thought after her fantasy became a reality, and the meaning behind it brought to light, that she would abandon her love of the mythical world. Except it didn't.

Instead it inspired her to paint, to turn a blank canvas into an outlet. Sarah hoped that if she got the thoughts out in some form they wouldn’t haunt her anymore. Even though intrusive memories resurfaced from time to time Sarah cherished the friendship she’d found in Ludo, Hoggle, and Sir Didymus. There wasn’t a day that went by where she didn’t think of calling them. They’d made a pact afterall, should Sarah have need of them, she’d call. Even if she hadn’t seen them since her youth, Sarah still felt their presence with her. From somewhere unseen they granted her courage when she needed it most.

A clock’s distant chime pulled her back to reality, the brush stopped in its tracks, and Sarah sat a bit straighter. She wiped stray bits of paint from her hands before she turned to give the clock her full attention, and to a nearby window where the sun peeked in. A sigh broke the morning silence as Sarah rose from her stool, she’d gone and done it again. What should have been an hour of work turned into a full night of it. Not that she necessarily minded it, then again it wouldn’t have been the first time Sarah stayed up painting till the early hours of day.

She packed away her supplies and gathered the brushes together, on her way to the kitchen sink, Sarah mulled over the day’s events. Even if she hadn’t gotten any sleep, Sarah did remember her agreement to meet Irene for breakfast. She took one last look at the painting before disappearing into her room to get ready for the day.

Before Sarah dared to leave her apartment she compulsively went through her checklist, she went to every window to ensure it was closed and locked, each dial on the stove turned to make sure it was off, and she’d made sure to grab her keys. With all her steps crossed off Sarah locked the front door and headed to her car. 

Dark brows pulled together as Sarah opened her car door, she lingered for a moment. The air felt strange. Humid except for the fact it hadn’t rained in two weeks, there was something else there, but Sarah couldn’t make out what it was. All she knew is it didn’t feel like an autumn morning at all. Rather than worry over it she pushed it aside, one cup of coffee and all would be right with the world.

A short drive later her blue beetle parked in front of Corinne livres et boulangerie, a quaint bookstore and bakery Sarah adored. It held a special place in her heart because it had been where she’d become fast friends with the shop owner’s daughter, Layla Corinne. The two had met during Sarah’s junior year of college, she’d even bought one of her paintings. It had been one of Ludo, a big smile and perked ears with one of the door-knocker rings in his mouth. Toby also took a liking to Layla, which Sarah was grateful for. She sometimes even helped him with his school, tutoring him in math or english or whatever subject he struggled with.

It didn’t take long for her to find Irene, the woman already seated by a large window, and a cup of tea set between her gloved hands. The years had been kind to Sarah’s step-mother, though time had etched wrinkles into the skin around her eyes she didn’t at all look her age.

A warm smile blossomed on pink lips, “Oh Sarah, you made it.”

“Hi mom,” Sarah leaned into the hug she offered before sitting across from her.

“Thank you again for meeting to pick up Toby, are you sure you’re fine to watch him over the weekend?” The older woman played with her necklace, a golden locket Sarah’s father had given her as a birthday present. “He’s at that age you know.”

Sarah laughed, really, she almost couldn’t believe it. Toby was longer a chubby-faced, striped-pajama-sporting baby. In two months he’d be fifteen, about the age she was when she ran the Labyrinth. Sarah tried not to dwell on the thought too long. Their relationship had greatly changed since then. Toby was no longer the bane of her existence and she no longer villainized Irene because of her mother up and leaving. 

“Sarah?” Her stepmother leaned forward and reached for her hand. “Dear did you hear me?”

“Ah- yes, yes I’m sorry. I didn’t get much sleep last night.” She squeezed Irene’s hand in turn, “I don’t mind watching Toby. Speaking of where is he?”

Mothering eyes watched her a moment longer before she smiled, “I suspect he’s somewhere with Layla, he ran off looking for her when we got here. He had something he wanted to show her.”

Sarah glanced towards the sea of shelves beyond the wooden rails that confined the bakery to the front corner of the shop. Toby had taken many of her childhood books when she moved, so she had some idea of where he might be. A man obscured her vision when she tried to look down the fantasy section. Sarah couldn’t explain what brought her eyes to him, given that half his face was hidden in a book. He seemed about average height with short, dirty-blond hair swept into a curl against his forehead. Dressed in a cream colored suit, the blue button up beneath freshly pressed, and clear of wrinkles. 

Footsteps thundered towards her and demanded her attention, Toby all but launched himself at her, “Sarah Sarah Sarah!”

“Toby! Wait a minute,” Layla urged with a laugh, struggling to keep up with the boy.

Irene gaped at him, “you know you’re not supposed to run in here!”

“Hey, take it easy,” Sarah caught her brother in a one-armed hug, “what’s got you in such a hurry?”

Toby beamed with pride. “Sarah look, I found him! I found the Goblin King!”

A knot twisted in her stomach, her heart fluttered like a caged bird and Sarah tried to calm it. Panic started to set in. She would know if Jareth was here, wouldn’t she? Green eyes widened and darted back to the fantasy aisle. Her blood ran cold when the man in the suit was nowhere in sight. With her spiralling panic she hadn’t paid attention to Toby or the book he put on the table.

“This is him, isn’t it?” Toby pointed to the cover of a book about owls. Specifically, he pointed to the barn owl towards the center. “In the story, the Goblin King shows up as a barn owl, right?”

“Yeah, yeah Toby, something like that…” the words trailed off as Sarah came down from her high, despite the numb weight in her arm she ruffled Toby’s hair.

Layla must have noticed because concern masked her round features, though she tried to hide it so Irene wouldn’t see, “Oh! I just remembered, papa made too many apple turnovers so I put some aside for you, Sarah. Want to try one while they’re fresh?”

“That’d be great, thank you,” Sarah nodded, she gave her friend a small smile. A quiet signal that she was okay while rubbing a hand down Toby’s back. “Why don’t you go with Layla and pick out some sugar for the weekend?”

Toby threw his arms up with a cheer and was gone a moment later.

“Dear, are you alright? You’re pale as a sheet,” Irene worried.

“I’m okay, I promise.” She thought of something to take the attention off herself, “How’s daddy? Is he back from his business trip?”

Whatever words her stepmother spoke fell on deaf ears, Sarah took a deep breath, telling herself it must have been a cruel trick of her mind. She wasn’t a child anymore, Jareth didn’t have any power over her, and never would ever again.

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Taglist:

@13goblinsinatrenchcoat

@tangentasilem

(If anyone else would like to be added let me know!)

#labyrinth #labyrinth oc #layla corinne #labyrinth fanfiction #labyrinth fandom #sarah williams #jareth the goblin king #ludo #hoggle #sir didymus #toby williams #irene williams #my writing #two worlds two hearts

[mod-kyoko]

Hello there! My apologies if this has already been requested, but how about Shuichi’s fluff alphabet?

heya, mod kyoko here! of course you can! thank you so much for the request!

your fluff alphabet is down below ⬇️

caution, the picture below may strain your eyes!

⚠️⚠️⚠️

♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧

shuichi's fluff alphabet!

a - activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? how do they spend their free time with them?)

shuichi would enjoy calm, serene activities, like a walk through the park, on a beach, or sitting in the library. however, if you wanted to go somewhere rowdy, like an amusement park or concert, he would still enjoy it. honestly he would put up with nearly anything for you. if you're a rowdy person in general, he wouldn't mind you dragging him all over to do exciting things. in fact, he would find it refreshing!

as for everyday things, he prefers just being in your company. reading a book together, dining together, having deep conversations.

b - beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?)

for shuichi, appearance doesn't matter nearly as much as what's on the inside. that being said, he would admire the optimism in you, or your tenacity. he would appreciate an s/o who can be mature when needed, but also silly. shuichi just thinks your entire personality is beautiful, really.

although, he does love your eyes, too. he would stare into them as you're talking, making sure you know he is listening intently to whatever you're saying. he loves the way your face lights up when you smile or get excited. those are the things that he finds most beautiful about you.

c - comfort (how would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack?)

shuichi never really had to deal with something like this before, so he kind of just goes based off how he would want to be treated if he was in your place. at the first sign of your discomfort he will ask if you're okay. then he will ask if you need some space. if you say yes, he will leave, after assuring you that if you need something you can come get him anytime.

if you want him to stay, he will ask if you need a hug. he will wrap his arms around your shoulders and pull you close to his chest, resting his chin in top of your head. the one thing shuichi always wanted to hear was "everything will be okay," so he makes sure to tell you that as well. he hates to see you sad, but tries to act as calm as possible so his calmness will hopefully spread to you.

d - dreams (how do they picture their future with their s/o?)

he definitely sees you as a permanent person in his life, and he isn't too worried about where you will be in the future, since he mainly focuses on the present. however, sometimes he fantasizes about marrying you. he imagines what you would look like the moment he proposes, in your wedding dress, eating cake together.

if you dont want to get married, that's fine too! it has never been a huge goal or dream of his. plus, as long as you're together, marriage isn't too important. it's just a name change and a certificate, right? other than marriage, he does think about having children with you. he often wonders what they would look like, and how great of a parent you would be to them.

e - equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?)

shuichi sees the two of you as completely equal. your thoughts and opinions are just as important, and he always makes sure to include them. he isn't a very dominant person in general, so he would either be passive or somewhere in the middle. he can be assertive when needed, though. shuichi won't let anyone be toxic toward him, including his s/o. but that would be the only time when he would assert himself over you. other than that, he would never allow himself to speak over you or act like he is the "better" person.

f - fight (would they be easy to forgive their s/o? how are they fighting)

if you were ever to fight with shuichi, it wouldn't be over a petty argument. in those situations he tries his best to listen and apologize, then do his best to fix it. however, if it's a really big fight, he has a bit more difficulty holding himself together. at first, he would cry a little bit. then he would get frustrated. though, he would never ever resort to violence with you. while he might say things he will regret, he tries his absolute hardest not to hurt you.

however, shuichi can and will stand up for himself if need be, he isn't a complete pushover. *little headcanon tangent here*: if you happen to be arguing and he spots toxicity or ab*sive behavior, he will call you out. he is working on self worth and knows what he deserves. good for him :)

g - gratitude (how grateful are they in general? are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?)

shuichi sometimes gets caught up in his work and doesn't really see all the things you do for him. but when you're gone, he starts thinking about all the things you do. even small things, like bringing him tea when he is working, or dabbing his forehead with a wet cloth when he is sick. it is easy to not notice all the little things someone does for you, but shuichi is a thinker. if he realizes he maybe hasn't expressed his gratitude enough lately, he will immediately start giving back.

to express his gratitude, he will either tell you outright how thankful he is, or make a gesture. he will probably offer to do all your chores or treat you to dinner wherever you want. he makes sure to do this often so you never forget that he loves you and what you do for him.

h - honesty (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? or do they share everything?)

there are only two types of things shuichi would hide from you. one would be some guilty pleasure of his that he has been made fun of for in the past. he tries hard to avoid the judgement of others, even his s/o. the other would be something he thought would potentially hurt you, or something unnecessary for you to know (i.e. he overheard someone talking behind your back). he doesn't like getting involved with drama if it doesn't concern him, and he doesn't want you to waste your time on those petty jerks. plus, he genuinely doesn't think it is something you would want or need to know.

other than that, he tries his hardest to tell you the truth all the time. he knows from firsthand experience how detrimental lying can be to a relationship, and he cherishes you way to much to jeopardize it.

i - inspiration (did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? like trying out new things or help them overcome personal problems?)

this one is a big yes! you gave shuichi a reason to make self improvements! before you came along, he didn't realize he had such room for change (the good kind). for example, shuichi didn't realize his self worth until you started expressing your love for him. he finally realized he needed to recognize his worth and what he deserves.

after you entered his life, he went around asking the smartest people he knew for advice on how to be his best self. he thought that if he was going to have someone important close to him then he needed to be at tip top shape for them. you're very special, so of course he would want to be the best partner he could be. his friends mostly told him to try to keep an open mind, listen to others, but most importantly to take time for himself. he took this advice wholeheartedly, not just for you, but also for himself.

j - jealousy (do they get jealous easily? how do they deal with it?)

it's perfectly normal for their to be a small amount of jealousy in a relationship. shuichi is human, of course he gets jealous sometimes. he tries to shove it down, which of course isn't very healthy. when he bottles too much up inside he tends to get a little cranky, and might hole himself up in his room. but he would never think about taking it out on you.

when he gets like this he attempts to calm himself down before expressing his thoughts to you about it. he'll do breathing exercises or drink some tea and read a book. it helps him a lot to be alone in a quiet environment in these times. once he is back to his usual self he will laugh it off with you.

k - kiss (are they a good kisser? what was the first kiss like?)

now, shuichi was definitely not a genius first time kisser. he just decided to go with what felt right. your first kiss probably took place after the two of you got together, maybe a few weeks or days into the relationship.

you were talking about something that you really enjoy, and as he watched your eyes light up with excitement as you talk about your favorite thing, he realized this is the moment when you're most beautiful to him. as soon as you finished talking he looked at you with a serious yet adoring face and asked if he could kiss you. when you said yes, he slowly leaned forward until your lips met. he wasn't really sure of what to do with his hands, so he just grabbed yours. when it was time for the kiss to escalate into something more, he listened to his gut. you were probably the one to initiate the makeout session by nibbling his lip. he was all for it of course, just a bit nervous.

now he is a natural! doesn't take him much thought what he does with his hands, lips or tongue. you are a very lucky person, s/o. ;)

l - love confession (how would they confess to their s/o?)

shuichi put a lot of thought into this. however, he didn't rely on his friends for this one. although he always goes to them for advice, he wanted this to be all him. he also didn't want to be embarrassed in front of everyone in case you said no.

the confession happened while the two of you were alone, either in the dining hall, library or outside. you weren't hanging out, you just happened to be in the same place at the same time. so he thought this would be a good opportunity. he cleared his throat, not to get your attention, but to try to avoid his throat closing up due to nervousness. he would then say something like:

"hey, y/n, i was hoping to talk to you about something." as soon as he got your full attention he would start rambling on about how he admires you. he would compliment your ultimate somewhere in there, before finally getting to his point. after clearing his throat again, he makes his best effort to look you in the eyes (though that is pretty difficult for him), and says it. "i like you, i think you're very sweet, and i want to get to know you more." when you told him the feeling is mutual he actually started freaking out internally. of course he tried to keep himself composed on the outside though. (babyyy ahhh)

m - marriage (do they want to get married? how do they propose? what would the marriage be like?)

he wants whatever you wants honestly. marriage isn't a need for him, but don't get me wrong he would absolutely love it too. anyway, the proposal would be fairly traditional. he would spend a great deal of time picking a ring, definitely worrying if you would like it. once he is sure he found the one, he would buy it and immediately start thinking about where to propose.

he would end up choosing a place that isn't too public but still somewhere significant to the both of you. he would definitely wear something nice too. it's kind of important to him that there aren't people around, because you know that can potentially cause problems. plus, this is a you and him thing, not for anyone else! finally, once you're alone in a quiet spot, he would get down on one knee. "s/o, you're the most important person in my life. you inspired me to become my best self. i am so ready to spend the rest of my life with you, devoting myself to you and only you."

domestic life with shuichi is amazing. you never really notice how different he acts around you versus others until you live together. you both balance chores, go together to get groceries, etc. somehow you make the boring and mundane more exciting :)

n - nicknames (what do they call their s/o?)

shuichi doesn't seem like one for pet names at first. further down the line, though, they would grow on him. he originally just called you by your name, or a shortened version of it. Then he started to use babe, honey, dear, because it seemed like you were enjoying it. his least favorite pet name for you is babe. he really likes sweetheart and love. overall, pet names aren't his sort of thing.

as for him, at first he would just like to have you call him saihara. now, he wouldn't admit it, but he goes really soft when you call him baby! if it's you, he will let you call him anything to be honest.

o - on cloud nine (what are they like when they are in love? is it obvious for others? how do they express their feelings?)

although he isn't one to brag about his s/o to others (in fact he actually prefers to be pretty private about his love life), it is quite obvious to everyone that he is in love. they can tell because he seems happier, and more talkative. miu even said that he is "glowing." :)

of course it's even easier to tell when he is with you. you can see his true feelings in his eyes when he is looking at you. you can feel his true feelings when he kisses your knuckles, when he leans his head on you. You can hear them when he expresses his love for you verbally every day. He expresses his love in many ways, even in small gestures that might be overlooked, like making an effort to not wake you up if he has to get up before you, or organizing your mess.

p - pda (are they upfront about their relationship? do they brag about their s/o to others? or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?)

as i said before, shuichi isn't very comfortable being open about his relationship. the most he would do in public is hold hands or hug. he won't necessarily brag, but he will answer polite questions like "how are you and s/o doing?" with pride. he is definitely proud of you, even if he doesn't make a point of telling other people. he tells you, which is what is important.

q - quirk (some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship)

his ultimate! shuichi's talent as ultimate detective allows him to be very perceptive and smart, not to mention mature. this is good for relationships since he can tell when your behavior changes, which he can then ask you if something is wrong. his maturity and knowledge as a detective allows him to make rational decisions even under pressure, like if you're in a heated argument. he knows how to diffuse many different stressful situations because of his critical thinking skills.

r - romance (how romantic are they? what would they do to make their s/o happy? cliché or rather creative?)

shuichi isn't one for romance clichés, but he hasn't had much experience with this kind of thing, so that's what ends up happening anyway. other than the occasional bouquet of flowers, necklace (if you wear jewelry), or snacks, he doesn't give gifts much. he thinks love can't be bought with money or gifts (hear hear). of course he gets you gifts on anniversaries and birthdays and holidays, though.

s - support (are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? do they believe in them?)

of. course. he believes in you, and he is more than willing to help you achieve your goals, whether that be directly helping you with a task, or just giving advice. if he isn't tired or busy with work, he will do anything he can to help. shuichi is actually really invested in your goals. we all know he likes helping others, and he would most likely receive a sense of pride after seeing you accomplish something whether on your own or with his help.

t - thrill (do they need to try out new things to spice up your relationship? or do they prefer a certain routine?)

to an extent, shuichi really enjoys routine. but, like any person, he would get a little bored without occasional exposure to new things. he asks you to take him out to do something interesting at least once a month. his favorite new thing was going to a pottery store and learning how to make things out of clay. it was super satisfying to him to make something artistic. i might even say it was therapeutic for him. he also really enjoys going to art museums! this man has a natural affinity for art. it gives him a sense of serenity.

u - understanding (how good do they know their partner? are they empathetic?)

shuichi knows a heck of a lot about you, mainly because he loves listening to you talk about yourself. he often asks you questions so he can learn more, too. he genuinely doesn't mind it. he enjoys falling asleep to your voice as well! as for empathy, he tries his best to understand your feelings. he often asks himself how he would feel in your situation, and that helps him a lot with empathy.

v - value (how important is the relationship to them? what is its worth compared to other things in their life?)

shuichi knows well enough to put his own health, mental and physical, over anything else, even you. however, other than that, you're probably at the top. maybe even more so than some of his friends. he loves you and appreciates you very much! honestly, his life would be so different without you and he doesn't know what he would even do.

w - wild card (random fluff headcanon)

he likes to dabble with cooking (just imagine shuichi in an apron oh wowwww).

he is a bento box lover! he will often make you them with different ingredients each time to see what you like most, and just to experiment with flavors. he is really good at it too, everything he makes for you is homemade. he takes a lot of pride in it, especially when you enjoy them! (he would be overjoyed if you made him one so you could eat together. <3)

x - xoxo (are they very affectionate? do they love to kiss and cuddle?)

while shuichi isn't the most affectionate person ever, he does love it. when the two of you are alone he will often lean his head on your shoulder, grab your hand. if he is reeeally in the mood, he loves to make out with you. his touches are usually slow and sensual. he will hook his arm around your waist, lovingly caressing your body, or rub his thumb on the back of your hand. all of his affection is displayed thoughtfully and with care.

y - yearning (how will they cope when they're missing their partner?)

for the most part, shuichi likes alone time. but, if you're gone for a long period of time, he will get a bit grumpy. sometimes it will be noticeable, but not always. if he misses you that much, he will busy himself with a book, hangout with a friend, or just fantasize about you. whether he relives old memories or creates fake scenarios in his head, that is a great way for him to cope when you're gone.

z - zeal (are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? if so, what kind?)

if you were having any kind of relationship issues, shuichi would definitely try to salvage it. however, there is a certain extent to what he would do to save it. but don't worry, he doesn't give up easily. he will give your relationship what it needs to thrive. a break, space, communication. these are all important to him. of course he doesn't want to lose you. i see shuichi as someone who won't take any bullshit, either. he will try his best to fix it.

♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧♤♧

this concludes shuichi's fluff alphabet! i hope you liked it. i'm sorry if it is a bit long, i tried to condense it just in case.

have a great day!

-mod kyoko <3

#shuichi saihara #danganronpa imagines #mod kyoko #danganronpa headcanons #fluff alphabet #danganronpa fluff #danganronpa x reader #v3 killing harmony

[alexs-ummers]

what once was / pt. 1

Pairing: Starts Steve Rogers/Reader ends with Bucky Barnes/Reader

Summary of Part 1: Steve’s and your relationship after “the blip”. The ways in which you find solace in one another. Maybe it was never enough.

like post endgame and beginning of falcon and winter soldier

Words: 1628

Warnings: angst, small make-out.

Notes: i dont remember endgame 1000% clearly but i think its good? be prepared for the upcoming angst i aint done. im tryna get into Bucky in tfatws

The past five years have been tough on Steve and you. Steve blamed himself for the most part; he always did for anything that went wrong. You missed your friends. After a while the world had to go on. There was still half a world of people that needed people like Steve and you. You still needed each other. That pain, that hurt, blossomed into a sort of love. That’s what you referred to it as in your head. But you’re sure for Steve it was merely out of convenience.

That was too harsh. Steve loved you. The team had been through so much together and you had stood beside Steve for all of it even when you thought he was in the wrong. You did it because you trusted his judgement. He was a righteous and kind man through everything. And Steve always did what he believed was right. You had always admired him for that. But Steve loved everyone on his team, that included you. He did love you in a different way, maybe in the same way he loved Bucky and Sam; but never in the way he loved Peggy.

Steve would make love to you when you needed it, he’d kiss away your tears when everything was too much, he’d provide you with as much normalcy as he could. He’d tell you stories about Bucky and him. He’d tell you how beautiful you looked when you woke up. You’d cook him breakfast in the morning. And for five fucking years, it felt like Steve was yours. You had dreamed of it for so long. When everything else was taken from you two, it had to be the one good thing.

And then the words were uttered. If it wasn’t for those words, maybe everything to come wouldn't have hurt so much.

Those words, you never saw them coming. You reminded yourself often what this was, what you were to each other: a comfort. Your heart couldn’t handle losing another.

It was a late night. The wine had probably gotten to you, no, it had definitely had gotten to you. The sound of your laughter echoed across your apartment walls. Steve had been telling a story about Bucky and him.

“And he’d always try and set me up, you know? I think it was more for him than me.” He had that longing look on his face, but it had been so many years, the memory warmed Steve’s heart. A ghost of laughter. It put that sweet look in his eyes, the one that looked like he had never seen hurt before. “And then I met Peggy…” He trails off, sighing almost longingly. You never minded. Peggy was his first love. It gave Steve peace to reminisce and who would you be to him if you denied him that?

A look similar to Steve’s was adorning your face. You hadn’t ever known Peggy obviously, but you knew Bucky. He was a lot more stoic than how Steve described him in the 40s. The stories made you feel like you were there. An almost escape to the world you lived in now. “I always love these stories. You look so… happy when you tell them.” You bring a hand up to tenderly touch his cheek, wine glass in the other. Your head is leant against the top cushion of the couch as you admire him. It would never get old; having Steve look at you this way.

“Telling you the stories makes me happy.” Steve returns your smile, leaning into your touch like he always did. Steve came to love your presence. You were soft and gentle when everything else wasn’t. There were other sides to you: the side of you in battle, in grief, in bed. But these late nights, it was soft. You were always what he needed at any moment, molding to nearly fit his needs. It was like a superpower.

The two of you share a moment, eyes not leaving one another. All this time, it didn’t get old. Your relationship grew slowly. It hadn’t always been like this, but you had always been each other's rocks. Maybe a year in, that’s when it turned different. It had longing looks when you forced each other out of the house and then another year in it was laying in each other's beds when the nights were too dark. Another few months after that it was every night you find solace in each other’s bodies, in whispers and breathless moans. Shortly after that it was breakfast, laughing, reminiscing, and what felt like healing. As much healing you could do without the people that mattered most. As much healing you could do with that hopeless feeling still in your chest.

There’s that moment and then there’s the kiss. When Steve can’t hold himself back anymore. He’s gathering your face up in his hands, feelings and words unsaid bleeding into the kiss. It would knock you off your feet every time if you weren’t sitting. It’s always returned, always just as passionate. There’s probably more you’d say to Steve than he would you, but it doesn’t matter. You try to brush those things off. He pulls away to look at you, catching his breath. He always felt like he got carried away with you, that he’d let himself drown within you given the chance. If he was a weaker man.

“Y/N… I-” He stops himself, taking the glass from your hands and setting it on the coffee table. Steve didn’t want to ruin a good night: one filled with laughter, sneaky touches, those looks of yours. He goes back in.

There was nothing like Steve in the world even before the blip. This you knew. Your hands wander over his chest, through his growing hair, and it doesn’t take you long to straddle his hips.

This was the other side Steve was talking about. It wasn’t always the same, but every night he’d figure it out. He’d draw it out of you. He begins the process, hands trailing along the exposed skin of your body, lips working their magic on you. The kiss was deepened by him, his tongue drawing the noises out of you. Steve grew to know all your secrets, all the things that would make you shiver against him. You had so much time with one another, it was bound to happen. He’s sure you knew all his tells, all the ways to make Steve Rogers unravel.

Steve got lost in you often. Nights were long and the two of you never got bored of each other. Steve got lost in you, but tonight was different. His thoughts were faster than usual, he couldn’t focus his actions as much as he wanted to. Steve craved to whisper the words he held onto for so long. He was so unsure of them at other times, unsure if they were meant in the way you wanted. But Steve was lost in you. His thoughts were no exception. He halts his actions, pulling away to breathe. Forehead rested against your own as you bask in each other’s presence.

These moments, sometimes they’d slow down, cherish every second. Steve was a purposeful lover. Except this time, it’s not because he wants to take it slow.

He nearly bursts it out, the words he always meant for another lover, but here you were, the one person that provided him comfort when no one else could. The person who listened to his boring stories. The one who watched him cry at night, would cradle his head in their lap, against their chest, cry with him and hold him. And Steve is so very lost and he’s not sure when he’ll be found by another. But he’s found by you.

“I love you, Y/N.” Steve whispers against your lips, the words ghosting around you.

It catches you off guard and you pull away to look at the look on his face. He’s serious and there’s that look in his eyes, but this one is different and you haven’t seen it before. It puts that hope back in your chest. It was a dangerous thing, that hope. It was always, always snatched away.

“I love you, Steve.” Every ounce of your being is poured into the words and the kiss to follow.

The hope grew and grew it seems from that day forward. Through Steve, through Natasha, and finding Tony. To restore the people that were once lost.

Those words, the confession. You always think maybe if Steve never said them it wouldn’t have hurt as much, but you know that’s a lie. And you don’t know if you can ever blame him for them. You were just as lost. Maybe there was no one to blame.

But it was always snatched, always. Everything chipped away at it, the deaths of your friends, the death of mentors. But you had Steve. You always had Steve. Yet the moment Steve was sent back in time to fix things, after everything he had done, you knew. You always knew. The hope would be lost for good. The hope Steve had planted within your chest. Perhaps it was a second too long he went back that you realized.

And there he was, full of love for another. And again, you didn’t blame him. You couldn’t because he had that look in his eyes. Like he had a story he didn’t know where to begin. Peggy and Steve belonged together. You were a comfort in the darkness and he was yours.

It never hurt any less.

Maybe the only one who really understood was Bucky. Perhaps he felt that same twinge in his heart. And after Steve’s death, you felt you were left with no one. Bucky and you shared that pain, little by little.

#Steve Rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #Bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes x you #Bucky Barnes imagine #steve rogers angst #Steve Rogers imagine #marvel x reader #marvel imagines #steve rogers x y/n #marvel #Steve rogers #bucky barnes #my writing #angst