#i have a big and better post about this in my drafts somewhere...... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

daegall · 7 months

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☆ late night company.

➷ in which the Gods give you a shit day, and Aphrodite makes up for it.

pairing: son of poseidon!jeno x daughter of ares!reader

genre: hurt comfort, fluff, slight angst, bff2l!AU

warnings: anxiety, injuries, reader is implied to be female!!

word count: 4k words

a/n: sorry if any opla readers get this i just suddenly got the urge to write for mr lee jeno bc <3 jeno tee hee !! also wtf this work has been sitting in my drafts for a whole 8 days i wanted to post it SO bad but i went out of country and didnt have my laptop </33

anw!!! bros the sunflower of 3 years is now jeno biased,,,, sorry hyuck i still love you

You feel your heart continuously spiraling in your chest. It's growing wild, crashing heartbeats uneven and quick. With every breath you breathe, you feel a dark, nervous pit in your stomach grow.

Anxiety.

One place you never fail to find yourself at when you're feeling especially weak, is none other than by the river. Oftentimes you spend your time skipping rocks or staring at the water, the tranquility bringing some kind of peace to you.

However, none of those things seem to help tonight.

You sit on the dock, playing and fiddling nervously with your fingers as your mind runs too fast for your liking.

"You're on my property,"

A sudden voice to your right startles you, more than you'd like, yelping in surprise.

And at your reaction, the person next to you instantly knows something is wrong.

It's Lee Jeno, son of Poseidon, heartthrob of all of Camp Half Blood.

Someone who's stolen your heart.

Jeno stands there with a boyish smile on his face, a glint in his eyes shows no harm, though shines with charm. His hair is messy, which is normal for this late hour, but he seems as awake as ever.

He's a big reason why you're in this state, and it seems to get worse and better at the same time as you observe his expressions. His eyebrows crease, in worry, lips that were previously smiling quickly transforming into a worried frown.

"Sorry," You mumble, frantically standing up. "I didn't realize,"

How did it even slip your mind? You're by the lake, he's the son of the God of the Seas, of course you're in his area.

Before you can take a step forward, Jeno halts you, "No!" he reaches out with a hurry laced in his voice. "No, please stay,"

He could never forgive himself if he were to leave you alone in such a state. It's clear you're vulnerable. And for you to be just the slightest bit disturbed is a bad sign.

You've always been calm, composed, even in the heat of a battle, you were always so sure of yourself. Seeing you here, so oblivious about everything, your mind drifted somewhere far? Jeno can't help but worry.

"O-oh, okay," You nod, before awkwardly retracting your foot, taking it back right next to your other one.

It's silent a moment after, with neither of you knowing what to say. All that can be heard is the quiet waves rippling through the lake, and the soft bristling of the trees brushing against each other.

God, Jeno looks really cute tonight.

It's rare to find him outside of his armor, paired with his sword, gifted from his father, and shield, looking fit for the title of a demi-god, and yet tonight you see him so human. He sports a bomber jacket, a random band t-shirt underneath, and a pair of basketball shorts.

To put it simply, Lee Jeno looks very boyfriend material right now.

To him as well, you look different from what you're usually looking like on a daily basis. Just like him, you look human. But in a different way. Once again, you look vulnerable. There's an obvious nervous glint in your eyes, unfocused and darting everywhere, and your form shrinks with every moment that passes, arms hugging to yourself.

"Are you okay?"

Jeno's voice is comforting, gentle, and yet it still manages to startle you.

Why are you so uneasy tonight?

You don't respond. Your mouth opens, but nothing comes out. A moment passes, then another, but you can't seem to find your words.

"No," You breathe out. In an instant, you feel your body relax when the truth finally comes out, relaxing further when Jeno seems to be unbothered by the fact, reaching out to you.

You accept his offer, stepping closer to him, your fast heartbeat finally slowing when his hands gently search for comfort in yours, his thumbs rubbing gently at your skin.

"I'm not okay,"

"I know,"

And when Jeno looks into your eyes, he doesn't think anything could hurt him more than this. He's been in countless battles, earned multiple injuries and scars, but there's a different kind of hurt when he sees the tears forming at your waterline.

"Can you explain?" You find solace in his warm touch, following as he tugs at your arm. A silent invitation to his cabin. You don't pull away. Jeno glances at you for an answer, smiling softly when you nod simply.

You can't explain it, but there's a feeling you have whenever you're around Lee Jeno. It's comforting, gentle, and you feel that you can be genuinely vulnerable around him.

You think it's love.

You date it back to last summer, when you had defeated him in a small spar together. Despite you winning, he was the one smiling brighter. It confused you at first. You thought maybe he was making fun of you, maybe he let you win, but a moment later, you realized it was admiration.

The way his smile caused your own had your heart lifting, filling your head with thoughts you never thought you'd have for anyone.

When you went to Jaemin, son of Aphrodite, he thought you were dumb at first. How could you not see it? Lee Jeno had been harboring feelings for you for weeks, and finally, you felt the same.

And just 2 weeks ago—13 days and 12 hours ago, to be exact, Jeno confessed his feelings.

Feeling terrified and confused about what to do, you asked for time, time in which he gave you generously.

You don't know why he's still nice to you, when you've been taking so damn long to answer him.

You suppose he really does love you, you conclude it when he's taken you to sit with him on a couch.

The cabin is quiet, so very quiet, it's a nice change from your cabin, full of life and busy people running left and right, with crafting tables in every corner, you like how quiet it is.

Jeno sits patiently next to you, his hands still in yours. "How are you feeling now?"

You peer up at him, attempting to blink your tears away. "Better," You sigh, smiling lightly. It's natural, and unlike your usual bold smile, but Jeno feels absolutely lucky to be able to see it.

"Will you tell me what's wrong?"

He means no harm, simply wanting to help you, but it still confuses you. How could he be so caring towards you?

You answer him, despite your mixed emotions, quietly mumbling, "I've just had a really shit day." Your head turns away from him, almost embarrassingly, pursing your lips.

Jeno's hand releases from yours, and although you instantly miss its warmth, his fingers find itself caressing at your jaw lovingly, before he turns your head back to him. He looks at you with care, so lovingly that it almost overwhelms you, as he speaks, "Tell me about it,"

Something about Lee Jeno just makes you want to melt, to depend fully on him and be loved, to love him. It scares the shit out of you.

"I lost a sparring," You mumble. Jeno can't help but chuckle a little. To others, losing a practice battle is routine, everyday, but it means so much to you it makes him feel proud of how passionate you are.

However, there's something you're not telling him. He can feel it.

"And then?"

"And then my siblings were constantly at my neck because of it."

Truth be told, it's not just today's battle. You've been off for 2 whole weeks, and for good reason.

But feeling this way... it feels so foreign to you. You hate that Jeno has such a hold on you, such an effect on you, plaguing your mind and constantly being reminded of him from the smallest things, it's new.

But another part of you longs for more, for more change, to explore this new thing, to be happy with Jeno.

"I feel weak," You tell him. You feel even weaker when he hums in understanding, feeling the warmth of his fingers caress your skin. His hand is still on your jaw, now wiping away the stray tears you didn't even realize you had let slip, oh so gently and carefully.

"I'm supposed to be strong, like my siblings, like my father. But I can barely control my emotions and actions and sometimes I just feel so... useless? I'm Ares’ daughter, for fucks sake. The God of war. I-I should be able to fight with no problem, win every fight. Isn't that what I was made for?"

You can sense Jeno's growing concern, you can feel it with each hush he lets out when you cry a little harder, you can feel it now that he's let both of your hands go to cup dearly at your cheeks, and you hate that you yearn for more.

Why must you appear so weak in front of Lee Jeno?

"I know it's just my emotions and whatnot, but... god, I don't want to disappoint people anymore,"

Jeno shakes his head, squeezing gently at your cheeks. "Don't say that. You don't disappoint anyone,"

"I disappoint my father—I disappoint myself." You say instantly, and it's clear it's a thought you've had for a long time. "I disappoint you..."

Jeno's eyes desperately search for yours, his face leaning in close to yours. "Hey, hey, look at me,"

His voice lulls you to a calmer state, as he shakes his head lightly, and despite all that you've said, how much of a burden you've been to him, he smiles at you. How can he smile at you? When you've been nothing but so frustrating tonight?

"You could never disappoint anyone," Jeno mumbles firmly, stroking at your cheek. "not me, at least,"

For months on end, Jeno has watched you beat yourself up for the smallest things you do wrong. A small mistake during a spar, tactics failing in a game of capture the flag, even when you get the date wrong you never cease to criticize yourself.

You've got high expectations. Expectations even you yourself can't reach.

"Don't you see? I'm disappointing you right now," You breathe out. It's full of anguish, distress, as if to prove a point. A point that Jeno can never see. "I'm being such a burden, you shouldn't even have to take care of me—"

"—I want to take care of you." Jeno interjects immediately. "I need to know you're safe. I don't care if you think you're a burden, because I know you will never be one."

Through your sniffling, and wobbly lips, a smile is somehow curling on your lips, as your hands creep up to circle around Jeno's wrists.

"There's that smile," He whispers, with the brightest grin you might ever see, a smile even Apollo, the God of sun and light could never beat.

Jeno leans in close, before he presses his lips gently to your cheek, cleaning you of your tears. Each kiss he leaves on your skin spreads warmth within you, like a fire growing bigger and bigger, until it consumes your whole soul.

This time, you welcome the fire, finally feeling secure within Jeno's arms.

What have you been so worried about? Lee Jeno may be oblivious at times, but he's not dumb. He's genuine, he's caring and loving and he's the same person who confessed his love for you 13 days ago, the same heart, the same mind, the same Jeno.

So, you fall into him. You don't care if it's terrifying, or if you have a few bumps on the way, because Jeno is your safetynet. He always has been, and will always continue to be your safetynet.

You just hope Jeno feels the same for you.

You're brought back to reality when Jeno pecks lightly at your nose, his laugh resonating through the room right after he sees your shocked face.

"You know I like you, right?"

You've known for 13 days and 12 hours. Even with all that time to process his confession, it's like he's saying it for the first time, as he holds your face dearly, as he stares into your eyes with so much emotion, it almost overwhelms you. He says it as if he means it.

And he does.

"I know," You know with all your heart. You melt when he smiles sweetly down at you, your throat burning with the urge to tell him that you like him too, hell you might even love him. Your fingers tingle, yearning for his touch, your heart burning for him. But he doesn't deserve it. Not after how long you made him wait for a response.

You don’t understand how Jeno could ever look at you the way he is right now, his eyes shining with such a dear look in them, his lips curling lightly. You know you look like a mess, with your puffy eyes and wet cheeks, how could anyone see the worst side of you and still love you?

You suppose it’s the pressure you get from all your tough siblings, standards way too high for you to reach, but you know you would feel the same if Jeno was crying in your arms as well.

“Good.” He mumbles. “It won’t change.”

A sensation hits you. Your heart jumps and you feel all of a sudden breathless. No amount of tears could take this much air from your lungs, and it’s not anxiety filling them. This time… it’s a warm feeling, it swirls and spreads all through you as Jeno continues.

“I know what you’re thinking, Y/N, that I would stop liking you just because you didn’t answer me. But that’s not true,” He shakes his head, stroking at your cheeks as he scoots closer to you. His voice grows softer, but with the distance between you two, he’s never been clearer before. “I’ll wait for you. Forever, if I have to.”

Lee Jeno has you hypnotized, and you wonder if this is what sirens are like, because he’s all that you want suddenly, you feel so dizzy and hazed with… love. You love him, goddamn it, and he loves you too.

“Just… take your time, okay? I want your answer to come from you, your heart. Not from your siblings, or father, or even me. I want your truth,”

And your truth is him. It stupid to think, but you truly do think that you were made to be with Lee Jeno.

When he pulls away, and finally gives you some (very unwanted) space, you decide to tell him.

“Jeno,” You breathe out. You’re sure the sounds of waves outside his window can easily beat your volume, but you’re more sure Jeno hears you, as his eyebrows shoot up instantly, and he hums, leaning in close. He’s always so tentative to you, you’ve always loved this trait about him.

“It’s been two weeks–”

“–I said you don’t need to–”

“–I want to,”

This time, it’s him who goes speechless, and you can almost see the pink in his cheeks growing under the dark light of his cabin. “Go on,” He finally says.

“Thank you,” You reply. “As I was saying, it’s been two weeks, and I’m ready to give you my answer.”

Jeno’s shocked when you reach over, fingers brushing over his, as you take his hands in yours. “I’ve… always been held under some sort of expectation, always being watched, waiting for some victory, and I hated it. I still do,”

Jeno’s heart softens, as does his eyes as he listens, knowing very well what you are talking about. You’ve isolated yourself countless times when you are unable to reach the expectations, afraid to show anyone emotion.

“and god, did I want to give up. I’m sick of my siblings always picking at my every flaw, judging every step I take. I felt trapped. But you… you’re the opposite. I feel so free around you, it scares the shit out of me. I think about you constantly, day and night, when I’m training or just reading a book, every tiny thing reminds me of you and it’s honestly scary. And you have no expectations for me, it was confusing at first, but I understand now. I don’t have any for you, either. I love how competitive you are, and how you’re still so humble despite being a child of one of the big three’s, and how you take care of everyone, even people you don’t know, and hell–I find your lame jokes funny. I never minded when you’d watch over me, if anything, I loved it. And I was confused what it was at first,”

You suck in a deep breath, shutting your eyes, Your heart beats loud in all your senses, you feel it rising at your throat, tingling at your fingers that Jeno caresses, but it’s okay. It’s Jeno, he could never hurt you.

“But I know now.” Your eyes flutter open, and in a second, your nerves fly away. Jeno’s looking at you with so much love, patiently waiting for you to finish, so you do.

“I like you, Jeno. I might even love you,”

You both grow silent after that.

Once again, you grow anxious.

Holy shit, did he lose feelings in the span of your 2 minutes spent ranting to him?

And when you’re about to lose all hope of an acceptance, Jeno’s fingers tighten around yours the moment they attempt to slip away.

Alarmed, your eyes slowly trail back up to his face, unable to read his expressions.

Jeno sighs. “Say it again?”

“The… the whole thing? I mean, I could,” You mumble. You’re serious. You could recite the whole thing if he wanted word-by-word, you’d do anything for Lee Jeno right now.

When he doesn’t say a word, you suspect it’s what he’s genuinely asking for, clearing your throat to start over once again. “right, okay, uh… how did I start?”

Suddenly, you realize that you are not capable of reciting the whole thing word-by-word. It had all come out with its own flow, you had absolutely no control of your mind, nor did you even think you’d have to say the whole thing again.

Despite that, you still try. “Um–I was always told I had expectations… is that what I said? I don’t know, I don’t really remember. Just something about um, feeling trapped, or something… and feeling free around you? Is that… I think that’s what I said.”

Stupidly, you keep going, knowing fully well that you can’t repeat the deep and touching moment. Jeno finds it so very endearing that you try, however, unable to find it in himself to actually stop you, when you look so cute holding onto his hands and trying to remember your words.

“Whatever, it doesn’t matter, but after that I said something about, uh, you being a child of Poseidon? God, I can barely remember. Anyway, you’re cool, Jeno, you really are–”

Suddenly, your mouth clamps shut. A warmth envelops your chin, lips, to your cheeks, before you realize Lee Jeno has his hand covering your mouth, shutting you up. You’re surprised to see a grin on his lips, even more so when he starts chuckling, taking his hand off to ruffle it gently on the top of your head. “Not that part,” He finally says.

“Then… which part?” The way you look at him, Jeno almost thinks you’re doing it all on purpose. Your eyes shining just for him, your confused scrunch on your eyebrows, how could he ever fall more in love with you?

“You love me?”

Oh. That part.

“...yeah,” You breathe out, growing shy. It takes you a moment, before you remember his words.

Say it again.

“I think I’m in love with you, Jeno,”

At your words, he seems to grow tense, but it’s different from all the sparring matches you’ve had with him. He has a huge smile on his face, his eyes creasing into little moons, moons in which you love, the smile that you long to see everyday. How did it take you so long to decide you love him?

“I think I’m in love with you too, Y/N.”

“Okay, cool,” You nod, attempting to act cool. The Gods know how you really feel, your heart beating as fast as ever, shit eating grin growing on your face as his hands slip in yours once more, as you lean into him. “that’s super cool,”

“mhm, yeah, really epic,” Jeno mirrors your attitude, you can tell he’s growing shy. You know from the way his voice dies down a little, growing small with mumbles, you know from the way he curls his body slightly, but he’s still as confident as ever, bumping his forehead with yours.

You chuckle at the action, shutting your eyes to savor the moment.

At that moment, you both silently thank Aphrodite, for guiding the both of you here, right now.

Your eyes open once again, and you find Jeno already staring at you. You offer him a smile, one that he welcomes, and returns with his own bright grin. His mouth opens slightly for a moment, but nothing comes out. Jeno blinks, thinking hard to himself.

You wonder what he could be thinking about, but before you could wonder more, or even ask what’s on his mind, he speaks.

“Can I… kiss you?”

You chuckle lightly at his words, bringing your forehead away from his as your head throws back in soft laughter. Albeit confused, Jeno still watches, his heart burning with every laugh you let out.

“You know you don’t have to ask, right?” You finally say as you stop laughing. “Go ahead,”

Jeno smiles, and his face is so close to yours that he could smile against your own. Your noses brush, eyes slowly shutting, and his warm lips envelop yours. It feels tender, soft, gentle, and loving, his hands wrapping slowly around your waist. Kissing Jeno is different from what you’ve always thought kissing him would be like. It’s comforting, not rushed. It’s welcoming, it feels like home, where you’ve always belonged.

Jeno feels the exact same thing, his lips curling and shifting between yours as your hands hold dearly at his jaw, caressing at his skin.

When you pull away, all that resonates through the Poseidon cabin is your shallow breathing, and sounds of the soft waves hitting shore, and it couldn’t be more perfect. In Jeno’s arms, worrying about nothing, thinking about nothing but him.

“Stay the night?”

“What?”

Jeno’s eyes widen as he realizes his abrupt words, his mouth gaping. “N-no! Not like that!”

You both know it’s not like that. You find it cute that he still says it, anyway.

“I-I mean, your siblings upset you, right? You don’t want to go back to your cabin–unless you want to! Of course, it’s your choice, completely,”

And they say chivalry is dead.

All you can do is continue to stare at him as he goes on and on, admiring the way his cheeks grow red, and his rushed words, you wonder if this is how Jeno felt when you ranted before.

“I, personally, don’t want you going somewhere you don’t feel safe in, you know? With people who have hurt you. We could just hang out, talk, or something. I can show you a bunch of stuff my dad left for m–”

This time, Jeno’s shocked, blinking at you as your hand envelops his lips to halt his ranting.

“I’d love to stay over,” You mumble, dropping your hand from his face. “you’re the only one I feel safe with right now,”

Jeno finally grins, feeling love resonate through his body, reaching out to place his palm on your cheek. The love spreads and multiplies as you lean into his palm, like a disease, but you know if that was the case you would have been infected for a long time already.

“...so can I check out Poseidon’s trident?”

“Oh, for sure. That thing’s huge.”

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dyslexicsquirrel · 3 months

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This is a super rough draft and I'm working to polish it up for AO3 but have some childhood friends who kissed (no homo) second chance romance(?) Harringrove

I haven't posted anything in forever and this idea took over my body so uh I hope you like it? If you don't? Don't tell me lmao

Now I'm thinking about childhood friends Steve and Billy who practice kissing and whatever it's totally not gay. But Steve is like imagining their life after high school together, how they're gonna go to the same college and be roommates. Maybe if they get to kiss sometimes still that would be fine.

He tells Billy about it cause they're best friends and they tell each other everything. He thought Billy was on board. He helped Steve study, made sure he graduated.

So he's a little surprised when he gets to the school and Billy's Camaro isn't there cause he was running late but Billy always did like to make an entrance. Except Steve keeps checking down their row in the stadium and Billy never shows up. Doesn't come running onto the field when they call his name.

When he goes to return the cap and gown and pick up his diploma after the ceremony, the lady at the table check's her list and tells Steve "Looks like Billy picked his up the last day of class."

There's a big hole in the middle of Steve's chest that never really quite goes away. Not through college and parties or meeting his wife and getting married. Having his kids helps a bit but it's always there, sharp and jagged just like the boy who made it.

Steve focuses on work and raising his kids and maybe that's why his marriage falls apart. His wife handed him a big Manila envelope with sadness in her eyes. "You're a great dad and there's a part of me that will always love you, but I don't think you ever loved me, Steve, and I deserve better than that. We both do."

He agreed to everything, got split custody, and moved into an apartment in the city. It was beige and empty, but he covered it with pictures of his kids and ignored the way the hole in his chest started crumbling inward, growing every morning he woke up to silence until he felt hollow.

Steve got the kids for the summer and rented an RV. They were driving to California cause the kids had never seen the Pacific, he told his ex. She shrugged and sent them all off with hugs and kisses on the forehead. If a tiny voice in the back of his head called him a liar, he ignored it.

They ate at hole in the wall diners off the highway, but Steve splurged on hotels with pools cause sue him he was too high maintenance to live without soft sheets and good shower pressure.

Somewhere in Kansas or Colorado, Steve couldn't remember where they were right then, he saw the gas gauge getting low and pulling off at the next exit to find a place to get gas.

Steve almost ran a red light when he saw the sign at the convenience store on the corner. It had his brain lighting up like fireworks, memories of a past he didn't normally let himself think about crashing against the inside of his skull like waves.

There was no way. It was just a coincidence. He made sure the kids were fine and swung into the parking lot after the light turned green. "Dad's just a little tired. We'll find a place to check in after I fill up the tank."

The gas pump was old fashioned, not a single card reader in sight, and Steve shook his head with a chuckle, before rounding up the kids and heading inside. They dumped way too many snacks on the counter when they got to the front of the line. "Can I also get $40 on pump 3?" here told the guy behind the counter who was restocking cigarettes.

Short blonde hair, wide shoulders under a worn t-shirt, jeans so tight they molded to his ass and had Steve biting the inside of his cheek because he was in public, for fuck's sake.

He had to be really hard up if he was on the verge of making a spectacle of himself over some rando in a gas station. A grunt and the guy turned, pinning Steve with the brightest blue eyes Steve had ever seen.

Ones that haunted his dreams. "Billy?" he whispered, wallet slipping out of his numb fingers.

The guy who couldn't be Billy blinked at him, except he said, "Steve."

Robbie tugged on the hem of his shirt. "Who's that, dad?"

"Dad?" Billy repeated, sounding confused and a little accusatory. And seriously, fuck him.

"Just someone I used to know." He needed to get out of there before he made a scene of a different kind by jumping over the counter and punching Billy in his stupid, perfect face. "How much do I owe you?"

Billy's frown deepened. He bagged up all of the snacks, no longer meeting Steve's eyes and said, "Don't worry about it" when he handed them over.

Nope. He was not making it that easy. *You left. You left me. Why did you leave me?* clamored to get passed his lips, but Steve refused to be that pathetic when Billy obviously hadn't cared as much as Steve. He got his wallet off the floor and slapped his credit card on the counter, handing the kids the bags to hold.

Billy rolled his eyes, the way he had whenever they were kids and Steve did something Billy thought was stupid. They stood on silence except for the chatter of his kids and the bell chiming over the door when someone else came in. Steve took his receipt without a word.

"Come on, you two, let's go." He herded the kids toward the door, determined to walk out on Billy the way the other man had walked out on him, but Steve never did have much self control.

Billy was still watching him and their eyes met when Steve looked over his shoulder. "You know a good hotel around here?"

"There's a Best Western a few blocks down. Nicest place in town."

Was he imagining the question in Billy's eyes? Steve didn't know. Grace whined, "Come on, dad," the way only teenagers could and Steve let the door swing closed behind him.

Part of Steve was anticipating the knock at the door after the sun had set and the kids were both curled up in their beds. The other part called him an idiot for still holding a torch for the guy who broke his heart.

The rap on the door was soft, but Steve still jumped, tripping over his feet when he got off the couch.

There was Billy on the other side of the door, a cigarette dangling from his lips, hands shoved into his pockets.

Mindful of his kids, Steve stepped outside, leaving the door cracked behind him, while they stared at each other, the weight of all the years between them.

Billy broke the silence first, pulling the cigarette from his mouth, ash flicked from the tip in a cascade of sparks. "Where's Mrs. Harrington?"

That was about all Steve could take. He shoved at Billy's chest, still as solid as it had been back in high school, the prick. Billy didn't budge an inch. "I got divorced last year."

Billy took a long drag, a quiet "Shit" exhaled on a cloud of smoke.

"Yeah." Steve took the cigarette from Billy like they used to. He hadn't had a drag in years and almost choked.

There was no laughter, no jibe at Steve forgetting how to smoke. Instead, one of Billy's hands rubbed circles against Steve's back. Just that one touch unlocked something in Steve, all the years of longing, of loneliness, of regret. He wrapped his free hand around Billy's waist and tucked his face into the other man's chest.

"Why?" It came out garbled and wet from his tears but Billy understood all the same.

His answer made his tears run faster. But it was okay because size Billy's arms wrapped around him, holding Steve together. "Because I loved you too much."

"You're a fucking asshole."

"I know."

"I loved you too."

"I know." Of course he had.

They stayed like that until Steve got himself back together, the cigarette left to snuff itself out on the concrete. His eyes red and puffy and Billy wiped the moisture off his cheeks with his thumbs.

Steve leaned into Billy’s calloused palms, pulling the scent of Marlboroughs and warm skin into his lungs. He sniffed loud, echoed by the crickets and the distant traffic. He needed to say something or else he’d start crying again because Billy was looking at him the way Steve always secretly dreamed Billy would look at him one day.

He wanted to know what the hell he ‘loved him too much’ to stay meant, but this thing—could he call it a thing? Robin would probably call him a dingus right about now—was too shaky, like a house built on a cliff during an earthquake.

So instead, he said, “You know I meant why’d you pick that name when I asked why, but thanks for the declaration, I guess.”

Steve felt Billy’s chuckle where their chests still touched. “Now who’s the asshole?”

And, okay, Steve really was curious because Billy had to be the one who owned that place and had the balls to slap Pretty Boy on the front of a building.

Which meant he thought about Steve and the nickname he bestowed upon him enough to name his business after him. To have to see it every day and think about Steve.

So he was curious, but not enough to stop and ask when Billy was angling Steve’s head with the hand still holding his cheek to press their lips together.

It had been decades since the last time Steve and Billy kissed and it was still the best feeling in the world. The feeling of a full beard was new, but Billy’s hands felt the same, cradling the back of Steve’s head, the other pressed low on his back.

He still tasted like cigarettes and the mint gum he liked to chew.

Steve didn’t pull away until he heard the bathroom door close inside the room and even then he didn’t go far, pressing their foreheads together so they were still sharing the same air for as long as possible.

“How long are you here for?” Billy whispered, like he was afraid if he spoke too loudly, he would shatter the moment like spun glass.

“Just until tomorrow. The kids and I are going to California for the summer.” Saying it out loud, in front of Billy, made it feel like a dirty little secret. Billy knew why Steve was going there of all places if they way one side of his mouth kicked up. Steve had missed that smirk. He’d missed a lot of things if her were being honest.

“Maybe you can swing back through on your way back.”

The hopeful note Steve heard made him feel bold, reckless. “You should come with us.”

“What?”

“To California. You should come with us. I got an RV so there’s plenty of room. We could take turns driving. Grace and Robbie are cool kids, I swear. I’m realizing now that I said that that it’s kind of weird. Forget it—” His nervous rambling was cut off by Billy’s lips.

“Shut up, pretty boy. I’ve been wanting to go to California with you my whole life.” And, oh. Well, Steve was done for. His hands curled into the fabric of Billy’s shirt, holding on for dear life, scared if he let go Billy would disappear. “Besides, I should probably get to know your rugrats before I ask their dad to marry me.”

Steve's eye went comically wide and his heart stopped and that hole in his chest felt like Billy had slapped a patch over it. He wheezed. “Huh?”

“You think I’m letting you go again, Harrington?”

That was fine with Steve.

#harringrove #second chance romance #DILF Steve Harrington #fan fiction #no beta we die like Barb #rip #canon divergence #no upside down au

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compacflt · 8 months

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Oh to be Maverick, reading AD magazine and has a husband that will write you a blank check to buy any decor you want. Or collects expensive watches. And has the same taste. I don't know if anyone have asked this, what is your hc about their car preference? I hc that Mav likes big car because he's relatively short. And Ice likes luxury car. What do you think?

oh my god i have had this headcanon for so long thank god someone’s asking about it.

Ice will ONLY drive American-manufactured cars. like even when he travels somewhere and rents one. he will raise a stink about it.

It is a significant point of contention in their relationship & marriage that maverick is only interested in Japanese-manufactured motorcycles. Like they have had, and will continue to have, shouting matches over “why can’t you be a patriot and buy American motorcycles like harleys??!? What is with all the kawasaki and yamaha crap???” and “ice im telling you they just run better!!! the japanese just make better bikes!!!” tongue-in-cheek threats of divorce etc.

i definitely think of ice as less a luxury car and more a classic muscle car guy. back when muscle cars still were delicate and beautiful instead of hard and sharp, if that makes sense. there is a Venn diagram of luxury and muscle cars and he definitely has dabbled in the middle (see my fic’s deepthroating of the 2005 ford GT). But he won’t cross the line. (Won’t be caught dead driving a Porsche or mercedes for instance)

in the final final draft of my fic (ie the draft that will get posted before i call it quits on my top gun phase) the Dream Car is getting changed to a ‘68 Plymouth HEMI roadrunner. camaro is too mainstream i will admit. but see above for my “car preferences” hc.

#when maverick does finally get his license ice says he’ll pay for 60% of the car mav wants so long as it is American made #okay sooo if i said i wanted a jeep…?#ice (narrowed eyes): i would support that but you’re on thin ice #Mav just wants off-roading capability #not because he’s a big off-roader but just because ‘what if someday we need to go off roading?’#pete maverick mitchell #tom iceman kazansky #icemav #top gun #asks #edts notes #2005 ford gt is beyond sexy #also completely out of the price range of even a 2-star admiral so very unrealistic I have to admit #nah. interested in the LP American marques (Chevy ford Plymouth)#the holy trinity of 60s cars #can we not bring back 60s automobile frames but safe and make them electric? i pray for that every night #headcanons ive had for over a year now. time passes.

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pokelolmc · 4 months

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The Ultimate Enemy is a Disappointment (and How I'd Fix It) (Part 1)

A couple years back, I started analysing a list of DP episodes I thought had missed potential--and my analysis on TUE got SO big I made it its own thing. I rewrote it to death and could never settle on something concise enough, so I abandoned it. But I'm BACK baby. I can't remember where it is now, but I came across a poll on whether Reign Storm or TUE is the better special and the discourse reignited my passion for this analysis, and gave me motivation to trim off some of the fat.

Don't get me wrong, at the end of the day I do like this episode--or at least its ideas. I really liked the episode the less I thought about it, but now I see issue after issue in its execution. Hence, the "disappointment": it could've been great, but it missed the mark. This won't just be a one-sided roast of TUE, though. I have a ton of cool ideas for how to rewrite plot holes or fill in the gaps. The best roasts are constructive! (Though I would be rewriting it in a more mature fashion compared to canon's writing--keep that in mind).

Part 2 is now up: you can find it here.

So here we go: Part 1--the general plot contrivances/contradictions unrelated to Dan's character or the time travel system.

The episode introduced taking off the Time Medallions as a way to immediately return to one’s native time period, but then forgot this late into the second act.

Technically this plot hole involves time travel devices, but I'm counting it as a plot hole by character decisions.

The episode gives no explicit rules on lag time between removing the medallion and returning home, but it takes only one to two seconds to return Skulktech to the future after they dropped theirs, and it had to have been instant for Sam and Tucker to return to the past in time to escape rubble falling from FentonWorks (which was only roughly two to three stories high, not counting the Ops Centre).

Danny should’ve been sent back almost instantly when Dan took his medallion off—which would’ve completely defeated the purpose of Dan’s attempt to trap Danny there in the first place.

If they wanted to keep the plot point, they could’ve just had Dan grab the medallion and turn it intangible while it’s still around Danny’s neck…and that’s assuming that making it intangible while Danny’s still tangible doesn’t count as “removal��. That’s it. He never needed to remove it to begin with.

2. The Nasty Sauce explosion just…sucks. In my opinion, it’s too silly for the tone the episode’s trying to go for (and as a cause of major character death), and it wrecks the worldbuilding.

I tried to put it in way more verbose ways in my previous drafts, but I found another post somewhere on tumblr that did what I couldn’t—say it in three words:

“It’s just stupid.”

Assuming that semi-realistic laws exist in-place in the Danny Phantom universe (so it’s BASICALLY similar to ours) the Nasty Burger shouldn’t have been able to stay in business without a LOT of red tape, cover-ups and NDA’s. They had an explosive substance on premises, being taken care of by unqualified, minimum-wage part-timers instead of trained chemical safety specialists. Forget handling it, they shouldn’t have even had it in the first place! If they got it by going UNDER the law and covering everything up, then one of their employees shouldn’t have been able to just CONFESS to it at a public school assembly.

It also sounds ridiculous that a “certain combination of secret herbs and spices” could catastrophically combust in the first place. They could’ve made the explosion ghost-powered/altered; they could’ve made it not the sauce itself, but a pressure issue with its containment vats; they could’ve made it a gas leak or malfunction of cooking equipment starting a fire, or something. They could’ve made the explosion a Fenton invention at their home (where the whole family had reason to be at once, and Mr Lancer could hold the parent-teacher conference there like in Teacher of the Year). They've used more serious threats of explosion in previous episodes (like the Ecto-Filtrator in Million Dollar Ghost).

And instead they decided “Yep! This commonly sold and digested sauce is a dangerous explosive, and even a small handout serving is enough to blow clean through a wall when it’s heated up!” This is how we're going to kill all of the main characters' loved ones to send him on a villain arc!

Like what?

Nowhere else after TUE did the show acknowledge the Nasty Sauce in worldbuilding. There were no consequences of its risk being publicly revealed, nor did it ever pose a hazard again. It’s understandable, given the show’s episodic nature. Bu at least in The Ultimate Enemy itself, they should've thought about how it affected most of the previous episodes.

During his fight with Boxed Lunch, one of Danny's ectoblasts to a sauce packet demolishes an entire section of wall in the Nasty Burger. So how hadn’t any ghost fights ignited any Nasty Sauce before—or damaged the main vat, god forbid—and caused an explosion already?

If the sauce was always a part of the Nasty Burger’s recipe, then the entire restaurant was a ticking time bomb waiting to go off since season one, and nothing short of a miracle could explain why it hadn’t happened before.

3. This episode committed character assassination of Mr Lancer, for the sake of setting up stakes in the plot. And contradicted his personality changes in previous episodes (such as “Teacher of the Year”).

Mr Lancer, in my opinion, is the character done the single dirtiest in the episode. It warps his entire character around the plot, and turns him into a contrived mouthpiece for how important the CAT is. It leaves him even more malicious and mean-spirited than his behaviour in the first episode of the entire show—leaving him even worse than he started.

He didn’t have much character development, but there were some more positive changes happening in his personality as later episodes occurred. He started out as a selfish, corrupt authority figure (think Mystery Meat, Fright Night and other S1 episodes where he deliberately lets the jocks off the hook for their behaviour), but unwittingly acts in favour of the main characters in “Fanning the Flames”—although ineffective and easily taken down by Ember.

By the time of “Teacher of the Year”, we finally got a glimpse into his (albeit scant) ideology as a teacher around helping his students succeed, and his concern for Danny’s failing grades.

It even revealed his personal interest in Doomed, which gave him more in common with Danny and Tucker and humanised him in way a few other episodes hadn’t. Season two even demonstrated his (albeit brief) willingness to stand up and defend his students from a ghost attack in “Memory Blank”. Lancer, for a brief period of time, became more than just his job, book title swears and his frustration with rebellious students.

We're talking about the teacher who, in the early 2000s, kept a picture of himself crossdressing at school to convince his students to try their best with a "story about his sister".

The Ultimate Enemy, however, took Mr Lancer’s humanity towards the students—particularly Danny—and flipped it all on its head. It turned him into an elitist, mean-spirited asshole who verbally attacked his students (past and present) based on their performances on this single. Fucking. Test.

They made Mr. “there is no cheat code in school, or in life” Lancer into a cruel enforcer of the hamfisted and childish importance of the CAT. Actual “get rich vs dead-end, minimum-wage job” propaganda.

(Teacher of the Year)

And... one season later:

(that sure sounds like a cheat code in life to me)

To add insult to injury, TUE used Lancer’s death as the butt of a joke directly after spending the majority treating him like a total asshole—following up character assassination with literal assassination , and excluding him from the rest of the explosion victims in their memorial.

It feels to me, that it'd make more sense for Mr Lancer to be sceptical of the importance of the CAT based on TOTY. Replace him in the assembly with Principal Ishiyama or something. A stickler-for-the-rules school administrator looking to boost the school's image by pressuring kids on a standardised test? That ABSOLUTELY makes sense.

Mr Lancer could still be seen as a threat (or someone Danny can't reach out to for help), but in the department of simply being an authority figure Danny's used to dodging around with his ghost activities. Someone who'd still enforce consequences for Danny getting caught cheating. Someone who'd get his parents involved. He's the closest thing Danny could have to any level of support at Casper High, and Danny could think he's even lost THAT.

4. The way Danny got the CAT answers was contrived, and broke the previously established rules of ghost intangibility.

To cut a long story short, Boxed Lunch’s fight with Danny shouldn’t have gotten the test answers stuck to Danny’s back. Danny immediately turned intangible in anticipation of the explosion, and was thrown outside the Nasty Burger and through Mr. Lancer’s briefcase before turning tangible again.

That didn’t make sense; the series previously established that ghosts (in this case, halfas) were physically unaffected by explosions when intangible. “Million-Dollar Ghost” even demonstrated it when Vlad escaped his castle’s explosion in the same manner, and was left completely unmoved from his position at ground zero. The sauce packet explosion shouldn’t have even moved Danny out of place, let alone flung him out of the building (especially not compared to Vlad and an Ecto-filtrator explosion).

On top of that, the test answers couldn’t have gotten stuck to his back while he passed through the suitcase, as Danny was intangible and the answers sheet was solid. Even if it were possible for already intangible ghosts to grab onto tangible objects and bring them into intangibility, that’d certainly require conscious intention that Danny didn’t have in the episode. The test answers got stuck to his back by sheer accident on his part. Bringing other objects into tangibility always previously involved a tangible ghost grabbing hold of other tangible people/objects and consciously willing them intangible together. Ergo, he should’ve simply passed through the suitcase and its contents all at once—go to the other side, pass go, do not collect CAT cheat sheet.

The solution for this one is pretty simple—just remove the scene entirely. Not only does it break the lore, but it’s entirely pointless and redundant (more on that later when I talk about Clockwork—giving Danny the answers was his idea, and it was a terrible one). Instead, it would’ve been much more compelling if Danny stole the answers on purpose with his ghost powers—being put under so much pressure to succeed that he felt like he had to forgo his morals and use his powers to cheat.

#danny phantom #the ultimate enemy #danny fenton #dp rewrite #tue analysis #10 dp episodes with missed potential

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writingwithfolklore · 3 months

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I'm not a writer. But its work project I am working lately on. Its all good till I draft a dumb version of story. When I start with editing, it sound all stale, I feel like I'm just moulding the new one like the previous stories. Inspiration slips away TT

How to actually come on right terms as a beginner, when writing?

Hi! I think I know what you mean. I actually have the same problem when writing a new draft from a story I've already written. Luckily, there are a few short-term solutions to this:

Don't write your new draft alongside your old one.

Especially for a not so good first draft, you'll probably have an easier time being spontaneous and bold with making new decisions if you don't even open the first draft. Try to write what you want from memory--this will prevent you from just copying from the old draft and not really making any progress.

2. Similarly, be willing to take big risks.

Don't be afraid to change something big. Worst case, you change it back if it doesn't work. Best case, it takes your story somewhere new and better.

As for your writing sounding stale, this post might help with that:

It's mostly about "simplifying" your story, but also a bit about finding that little piece that brings out the characters and gives life to it. I hope it helps.

My long term advice is just that writing takes practice. As a new writer, you may have to struggle through a lot of bad drafts and disappointing feedback and false starts before you start building those instincts. My mentor used to tell us, "writing is a time game." as in, getting good just takes a lot of time and practice. I'm sure you'll get there.

#new writer #ask box #ask #anon ask #zoom in

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laeteria · 2 months

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It seems I never posted this here, so…

You may, or may have not, stumbled across this video, but yeah… My Tumblr is kinda dead, so I thought it isn't that bad of an idea to drop this one here as well.

There are some notes in the description, so before you go attack me because I haven't added XX role to YY seiyuu, please read the description 👊😔

Some Tumblr exclusive notes under the cut ✨

youtube

Why Paradox Live?

Yeah, I know I said I was not posting about Paradox Live anymore and considering the fact that the video was posted in October 2023, it seems pretty recent. However, I have been working on this video for AGES. I think that I will end up in somewhere in 2022(?) starting this video. I was still into Paradox Live and I had dreams to introduce people to it. Too bad that I'm a procrastinator… I mean, I could have chosen IDOLiSH7 as starting point as well, but Paradox Live had a bigger cast :)

My motivation to work on it

Guys, I'm not even kidding. I was planning to use Paradox Live to (hopefully) get some people into Argopro. The project had some difficulties and I wanted to pull people into it, so I did it in a very roundabout way. After all, not a lot of Paradox Live seiyuus are in Argopro like bro what am I even doing!? When starting with the roles of Kajiwara Gakuto (Allen's VA), there were barely any solos for Haruka (his role in Argopro). I remember downloading/ripping the audio of Orthros, because that song was barely introduced. Good old times.

What did I want to achieve with this video?

Guys, I'm just a girl who really likes sharing her interests and I'm a big fan of listening to music of several music projects because I think they are nice and they are different from other music if that makes any sense + you can listen to your favourite seiyuus!!! This was a video for my close friends because I always try to get them to listen to songs or to check out projects. This was merely a tool I used, I guess. My friends love me and I love them. In the end, it wasn't even needed because I post plenty enough on my insta story.

How I made the video

Bros, let me tell you. This was one hell of a dumpster fire of making this video. I'm not kidding. If you think you you can do it, go for it. I will never do it again.

I made the video on my phone. My phone has seen better days, y'all. I first made the template in Ibispaintx and after that I went into YouCut to put the audio over it. I absolutely hated it because you couldn't delete the files if you had the videos in draft (otherwise it will get corrupted which makes sense), but it took a lot of storage. I ended up saving them seperately per character, but the pain I had to go through everytime I made a mistake was painful.

This video is like 22 minutes long, but it took me nearly 2 years to finish it ( •̥ࡇ•̥ )

A little extra for you all <3

I still have the very first version of this video, so I thought, I might as well upload it for others to check out how ewww it kinda is, lmao. It was such a rough draft, but you can't have it all, right? Here is the link (the video is still unlisted, so you won't find it online if you don't have the link).

Another extra, which are the Paradox Live edits (this is a link to my Amino post, so yeah, it's a hell hole ngl) I did 4 years ago. I wanted to use one of them as my thumbnail actually, but I decided not too because people may not be used to that and thus may consider it over the top…

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afternoon-fireworks · 24 days

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“SAVING LOKI PRIME”:

A Complete Blueprint for Another 6 Episodes of Loki’s Post-S2 Storyline

POST I OF IV

Hello-hello! I know this tag is dying, but if you’re still closure-hunting or simply curious about how a Loki S3 could work, buckle up—I’m excited to announce we have a bountiful full-season outline to discuss that I’ve tried to model after the pre-existing canon as closely as possible, having studied this series as an undergrad screenwriter. When I was stumped with my own WIPs lately, I adopted the Loki S2 finale for a major drafting exercise. It’s been such a fun, special side project to do (although I’m not in any official writers’ room, nor claim to be for Mickey Mouse legal purposes), and I now rest it in your hands.

Feel free to skip to the images after the paragraphs if you’re not in the mood to slug through big text blocks to reach my main selling point here, but for extra tidbits on special thematic details and motivations behind episode structure, definitely stick around or revisit this section later!

Okay, down to business. My goal? To invent a logical back door out of the Yggdrasil Predicament, because while Loki’s major character arc for the MCU got beautifully resolved in S2 (glorious purpose), we all know his minor TV show arc remains tragically incomplete (a need for normal companionship). That’s 50% thematic damage, and with the tight corner the plot is written into, there is minimal room for further resolution. You can’t satisfy one arc without slashing the other in half. There aren’t many places to take Loki from this point without cheapening his sacrifice and overall development—which, you could argue, is either a genius move employed by the writers, or a downright frustrating one. Maybe a bit of both.

But a MCU installment with Mobius in the forefront? That’s our loophole. Maybe we revisit him sitting atop a jet ski he can’t afford because TVA retirees don’t have pension funds—somewhere to emphasize his (1) lack of purpose AND (2) lack of normal companionship. He has double the narrative incompletion/ambiguity, making him perfect for an advancement to main character status. Sure, he could wrap up his loose ends by settling down like his Sacred-Timeline-self did, manage to find a branch without Don on it, save enough to cash in on a jet ski, and take a childless vacation to Cleveland’s picturesque Edgewater Beach, but he is hundreds/thousands(?) of years old with a pressing conflict of abrupt access to human mortality, seeing as the TVA no longer halts his natural aging process. A century to him must feel like a decade, and a decade like a year. Midlife crisis material, am I right? He is going to die soon, and that’s slowly sinking in.

Furthermore, Loki may have spent centuries searching for alternative measures regarding himself and the Loom, but Mobius doesn’t know that. Even if he does remember the conversation his past self had with Loki in the Time Theater about “burdens”, depending on if that dead timeline ever got regenerated or if it’s a branched reality Mobius can’t recall, the fact remains that as far as he knows, Loki cut his search short and took the martyr route without a fair consultation first. Who’s not to say, then, that Mobius doesn’t glance up at the sky and declare,

“I’m not gonna leave you alone up there forever. I’m gonna get you down, even if it’s just for a minute.”

It’s the Savior archetype in motion—a classic—and not unlike Loki’s own archetype. This time around, however, Mobius will influence the Yggdrasil Predicament himself so that any thematic shift isn’t at the expense of Loki’s glorious purpose. Mobius’s glorious purpose, he believes, is using what few human years he has left to alleviate Loki’s burden. He knows Loki’s identity better than he knows his own, remember?

Diving deeper into themes, perhaps we can expect to see a sharp deviation from our initial expectations of these two. Loki comes to embody the stubborn force of selflessness, refusing accommodations, and Mobius gradually becomes the force of selfishness. Loki becomes Order, whereas Mobius, on his sometimes irrational quest to free him from his prison, becomes Chaos, unaware of the mental prison he has also trapped himself within. They each only get everything they want when they swap their primary characteristics and locate equal footing thereafter.

On that note, let’s take a peek at how another six episodes can take shape. “Episode 1: Changing of the Guard” and “Episode 2: Ageless Antiquity” are provided within this post, and you can find the other four uploaded to my page (all posted within a reasonable time frame of each other, because I know delays are a bane on memory and entertainment)! Oh, and since this season doesn’t follow a typical fic format so much as it does a disaster-bullet-point format, I’ve elected to keep it on Tumblr rather than on a fic website. Cheers, and happy reading!

- Lin

#loki #loki tv #loki show #mcu loki #marvel #marvel mcu #mobius #sylvie #loki series #loki season 2 #my writing

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snobgoblin · 9 months

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sobs that's a great request...

CHAOTIC ACE (GORILLAZ) X READER

rated: PG probably I dunno. nothing sexual

plot: see above image

(this was saved as a draft like over a month ago and to continue working in it I had to post it privately (too many drafts to keep taking breaks) so if the times are weird that's why)

Ace was sooo excited like really excited like the kind of excited you get when Gorillaz actually drops lore instead of teasing you with the thought of lore

and you know why?

he got to take his amazing date to go look at a bunch of junk at the gym... if he wanted to do that he could've just stayed home but this junk was DIFFERENT

SO! he picked you up in the car he found at the dump that one time it's NOT stealing if they obviously didn't want it anymore

and you both walk in. and everything's perfect. he's so handsome. you're so [PREFERED TERM OF ENDEARMENT] and you're so excited to be in each other's company

THEN BOOM

there's somebody that DOESNT approve. how homophobic (gender neutral) THE GOT DAMN SECURITY GUARD

"Ace?"

"Yeah"

"Of the Gangreen Gang?"

"Yeah" He had his arm linked with yours, and he pulled you closer, nervous

"No way bub. Last time you guys were here you busted a Mesopotamian vase, an expensive one. AND disturbed a mummy. Not to mention you guys stole that uh, candy cane and made Sedusa all big and stuff. She crushed my candle making business! I haven't recovered. Now I'm doing this!"

"Ah... yeah, kids do that."

The security guard raised an eyebrow

"Well, if it makes ya feel better I got a uh... this is my parole officer. Yeah- the jail thought I could use a little culture so they're showing me around," he lied. he was good at that. sometimes. let's see if this was one of those times. you nodded along to try to help "Yeah, soon as I step outta line uh, yeah"

The security guard shrugged. "I hear that about 10 times a day. And you frankly I don't get payed enough to care. Go ahead, get yourself arrested again. see if I care" he waved a hand

Ace pulled you in tight and quickly went in. he had one hand over his face, he stopped. "Yeah I... guess I shoulda expected that. Sorry about that toots."

You patted his back, reassuring him. "It's ok. You're not like that anymore. Let's just have fun ok? Stop moping" you smiled at him, held his hand, and he smiled back. then you guys went to go look at some paintings. Ace giggled whenever he saw any nudity, and you couldn't help but do the same.

it was fun until-

BOOM. POWERPUFF GIRLS COMING IN THROUGH THE WALL. they destroyed a painting of an orange with hyperrealistic eyes and teeth... for some reason

"STOP RIGHT THERE GANGREEN GANG!" Blossom said

Bubbles blinked "Where are the rest of them?"

"Probably wrecking stuff somewhere else" Buttercup accused

Ace yelped and hid behind you. "I CAN EXPLAIN! WAIT A MINUTE"

People were staring. Waiting for another ppg victory

Buttercup was about to do something, but Blossom held her back "He's got a hostage! Be careful!"

"HOSTAGE?" His voice cracked "KID, THIS IS A DATE. THE GUYS AINT EVEN HERE, HONEST... if threes a crowd, eheh, six must be a parade. Nah, i didnt bring the guys, you gotta believe me"

Blossom looked suspicious, and turned to you. "Is that true?" Ace clung to you.

"Ace is my boyfriend, yeah. We've been dating for a while. I got a ton of pictures on my phone if you don't believe me" You smiled and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze

Bubbles looked down at her feet "Are you SURE... he's kind of..." She didn't finish the sentence, but Buttercup giggled

Blossom just sighed. "I don't know why you would want him, but it's not our job to question it. I've got my eye on you Ace, so don't try anything. GIRLS! Let's go do something more important."

The girls flew out again, this time breaking a painting of a sad clown on their way out

You turned around, as Ace was still hiding behind you, and you cupped his face in your hands. He looked terrified. Before he could even speak, you told him it was ok, and he didn't need to apologize again. And that, if anything, you were probably gonna get arrested today for breaking some assholes nose. He laughed and gave you a hug, and you tried to go back to what you were doing before. He kept apologizing to you, but you told him it was ok. You look at the statues next. Ace didn't like the Medusa statue.

There were a lot of weird looks, a lot of people holding their kids closer to them as you walked by, but there wasn't another outburst, thankfully

You guys had fun despite what happened. But, Ace told you the next date would have to be somewhere without people

#wip #ok i know i said i would use a brain cell for this one but i dojt think i have one im so sorry #fanfics #x reader #ace copular x reader #ace copular #ace gorillaz

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silverloreleysfanfics · 1 year

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Real Names in “Descendants“

Here’s a rant + solution about the characters’ names in Descendants.

Who in his right mind could accept Lonnie’s name is just that? Mal makes sense for the explanation we were given, but Evie? Even assuming Ally is short for something, isn’t that’s a weird name? The books have stuff like Herkie, Lil’ Shang, Pin, Tiger Peony, Ginny Gothel and I don’t know how many more and while I get it’s about making them recognizeable as the children of certain characters, I do get it, I still think they’re bad.

So I decided to compile a list of presumable actual names of the Descendants kids, VK and AK alike that anyone could feel free to use in fics.

Two little notes before anything else:

the -son/-dottir patronimics I see sometimes in fics are North European and should be used only in the right context, avoided otherwise. In Ancient Greek the correct suffix is -ides (gender neutral), so Mal wouldn’t be Hadesdottir but Hadeides; similarly, Uma would be Ursulaides, and Ursula Poseidonides and so forth. Despite that, I assume Auradon would want to conform to the habit of fixed family names that is normal in modern Europe, so they’d make everyone adopt one, like Chad Charming, or use the place of origin, like Jordan of Agrabah.

The explanation I have in-universe for some names is that there's an obsession in Auradon with precising who their famous parents/relatives/family friends could be and many kids end up with nicknames tied to that. Either this or because names have power when it comes to magic, so real names are kept secret and known only by the most trusted people, but that wouldn’t get along with how magic works in the movies, nor with the fact Ben and Mal shared their middle names like it was no big deal (but then again, Ben could have a secret third name and Mal didn’t specify her first name is short for Maleficent). The first explanation is easier.

I’ve been working on this list for quite some time. As such, if you use this as reference it’s fine, but I’d like to be told at least, even in a note to this post and given credit if you pick one of my ideas that aren’t mainstream in the fandom.

Also, I may add to/modify this post later on, but without taking into account anything made after Descendants 3.

That said, VKs first:

Mal: we’ve been said Mal is just short for Maleficent and the daughter isn’t allowed to use the full name because she “didn’t deserve it”. Abusive and terrible, yet it fits. But I don’t think Hades would agree and in myths there is a Melinoe who is an Hades’ daughter, so Mal’s full real name could be Maleficent Bertha Melinoe Hadeides or just Melinoe Bertha Hadeides.

Jay: I saw Jayden around and, nope, it doesn’t work for me. Either Jayanth or Jayad (both mean “victorious one”) sound a lot better and more fitting for the general area Aladdin is set in. But, really, this page has tons of names starting with Jay, pick one from there. (also, for a proper surname you should check Arabic onomastic, which is complicated, so just use “of the Isle” or “of Agrabah”, unless you know the subject well. I don’t think Auradonians would bother to learn anyway)

Evie: oh, dear, my poor girl, what an atrocity. It could be short for anything like Evelyn, Evangeline (but the Evil Queen would never choose such a meek name, plus it’s tied to Tiana’s story), Evanna, Evalina, Evisse, all can work, but the one I prefer is Everhilde or Everild, which would call back to the Evil Queen’s real name, Grimhilde. On this note, I suppose Genevieve could work too with the “parent-children with same intials” trend.

Carlos: I already said I find weird he has a Spanish name when Cruella is British, and unless there are some Spanish roots somewhere in the de Vil lineage, his name should have been Charles. But recently I headcanoned his father could be Bruno Madrigal, so the Spanish name could stay (in the books it’s stated his middle name is Oscar, which @dragoneyes618 reminded me was also Bruno’s first-draft name), so, Carlos Oscar de Vil-Madrigal.

Uma: it’s a Hebrew or Hindi name and a weird fit for the granddaughter of Poseidon (yes, I am one of those who agrees Ursula is one of Poseidon’s children and thinks a name meaning “little she-bear” is a tad weird for a sea being). But, after all, Ariel is a Hebrew name too, so Uma fits the Little Mermaid lore and all is well.

The three Hook siblings (Harriet, Harry and Calista Jane) have the most normal and reasonable names of the whole franchise and I won’t dare to change them. Perhaps I’d argue Harriet and Harry are fem/male variants of the same name, but, really, there is worse in the franchise (and I guess, when she made up Harriet, Melissa de la Cruz had no idea they’d later create Harry for the next movies).

Gil: his real name could be Gillaume (variant of Guillaume) or Gilbert. Personally, I prefer the latter (like Gilbert Motier de La Fayette, you know, lol). His brothers’ names, unfortunately, fit with Gaston’s narcissism, so they can stay. The canon surname is LeGume, although I’m not sure where it comes from exactly as it’s never mentioned in either movie or live action as far as I remember.

Freddie: I think Frederique Facilier sounds great and she probably hates it. I read that in a fic but I don’t remember whose, maybe @ginnyrules27 or @hannahhook7744 or @dragoneyes618, feel free to correct me if it’s none of theirs.

Celia: it’s a name in its own good, used in both French and Spanish (fitting for New Orleans’ culture), but if we want, we can consider it short for Cecilia.

Ginny Gothel: assuming Gothel (like Yzma) was able to procreate and Ginny isn’t actually Cassandra’s daughter (I haven’t seen the series though so I don’t know much about her), Ginny is still an abbreviation, usually of Ginevra/Guinevere. I can’t fathom why Gothel’s name became a surname though, I’m at loss here, unless we are supposed to read it as Ginevra Gotheldottir (Rapunzel is a germanic tale, so this kind of patronimic fits), shortened Ginny Gothel.

Dizzy: I wrecked my brain on this. Drusilla or Desdemona. That’s it, that’s the top I could come up with. Drusilla Tremaine-Westergard, in my universe, to be precise.

The only other Tremaine cousin we have a canon name for is Anthony and I think it’s a perfectly fine name. Antoine if we set the story in pseudo-France.

Hadie: Hades had few children in the myths and Zagreus was the one I liked the most, that’s my reasoning. In myths, Zagreus is Persephone’s son but here it could be anyone’s, he’d still keep the Greek patronimic, so Zagreus Hadeides.

Squeaky and Squirmy Smee: those are 100% nicknames, it can’t be otherwise. In fact, in piracy, it’s pretty normal to have nicknames and aliases that are known more than regular names, like Calico Jack, Blackbeard, Big Murph and so on. The twins likely have normal names like Sullivan and Sean or something like that. In fact, their big brother is Sammy, short for Samuel, I assume, so it pretty much supports it.

Mad Maddy: while “mad“ is a mockery/title, Maddy should be short for Magda or Magdalene, but it’s used on its own too, so it’s your pick.

LeFou Deux: stupid name, like so stupid it can’t be real. Let’s pick a normal french name, like Denis LeFou, with the mockery he acts like father, they call him Le Fou Deux aka “twice as stupid”. Kids can be cruel.

Claudine Frollo: unfortunately, it’s an actual French name, but a religious zealot would maybe give her a double name, like Marie-Claudine.

Zevon and Yzla: I don’t know what to say here, I really don’t. Yzla sounds bad, that’s all I can say (but I admit Zevon has a nice ring). I accept suggestions.

AKs:

Lil’ Shang: first thing first, in China (and other Eastern countries) surnames come before names. So Li=surname Shang=name. Cleared that up, this name makes sense only as a nickname (which I hate). If we want it to start with S and an assonance with his father’s, we could pick Sheng (victory) or Shuang (clear and bright).

Lonnie: Lanying, which, mispronunciated, became Lonnie, it would make sense if said by kids first. (Fun fact: irl Lin Lanying was the name of a scientist, there’s also a Guo Lanying who is a soprano, both great women).

Herkie: oh, don’t make me start with this. This is one of the atrocious names that are clearly rip-offs of the parent’s names and I hate that. Hercules had lots and lots of children in the myths, from Megara in particular he had four: Therimachus, Creontiades, Ophitus and Deicoon. Pick whatever you prefer, I am partial to Therimachus, too difficult for Auradonians to enunciate, they started to call him Herkie as a nickname that stuck.

Tiger Peony: I’m certain I’m not the first who thinks a name like this is, like, the epitome of disrespectful. For the same reason, I admit I know nothing of the subject and ask if someone could tell what an appropriate name for her could be.

Ally: Allison Liddel (original Alice’s surname) or Kingsley (live action surname). Or another surname if she took her father’s (I am partial to the Tim Burton movies and ship Alice and the Hatter, so Allison Hightopp, but that’s just me).

Jordan: Joodah (or Joudah) meaning “generous“ or “of high qualities“ (as far as I could find, please feel free to correct me).

Artie: don’t ask me where I took it from, but in my head his full name is Arnault Pendragon (and he isn’t Guinevere’s son as Disney’s Arthur married another woman under the advice of Merlin, but this is all my headcanon).

Pin: Pinocchio’s son. Now, in Italy it is traditional to name children after parents or grandparents (I have one uncle and 5 cousins all named after my maternal grandfather and other 4 cousins after my grandmother, to say nothing of the ones who have them as middle names), so it wouldn’t be weird BUT! we don’t have names without final vowels, especially first names, in Italian, so he’d be called Pino. Which is also short for Giuseppe (Giuseppino) and I much prefer that (if they wanted to use Geppetto’s name it would have made sense too, and that he would have been nicknamed Geppettino > Tino).

Now, for the dwarves’ sons I picked German names with the same initials:

“Doc II” Dominic;

“Hap” Harold;

“Cheerful” Klemens;

“Gesundheit”/“Gus” Gustav;

“Bash” Bastian;

“Shy” Silas;

“Crabby” Conrad;

“Sleepy jr” Simon;

“Snoozy” Samuel.

Doug and Gordon are normal names and can stay.

Ruby and Anxelin Fitzherbert: I’m not even sure from where we got those names from for Rapunzel’s daughters, I seem to recall Ruby mentioned in Wicked World, maybe? Anyway, I don’t like either name. Anxelin is the name of a wine, that’s a very strange choice, and Ruby, uh, is too generic, I guess? There are so many german names to pick from, if we want to follow the pattern of same initial as the parents! Renate, Rayna, Reinheld, Richel, Roslin, Rowena... then Engelbertha, Eda, Erika, Evonne, Edith,... Just research a bit. If we really want to keep the original ones, Anxelin could be a deformation of something like Annegret or Analise, and Ruby could stand for Ruperta or Ruomhildi, although I prefer to call them Annika (same initials as Queen Arianna, Rapunzel’s real mother) and Roslin.

Opal: daughter of Mama Odie (what is it with those super-old women having teenage kids?!) can be Opal of the Bayou, I suppose. It has a nice ring, actually, although I don’t know what tie opal stones may have with voodoo.

Bobby Hood: usually, Bobby is short for Robert, which fits the area and the pattern. Robin is, at times, short for Robert, but I don’t think it’s the case here. The surname Locksley was discarded by Robin, provided it existed in the Disneyverse, but it’s worth remembering it.

This post will possibly be corrected expanded in the future and I appreciate further discussion, as long as all parties are respectful and thoughtful.

#disney descendants #descendants #here I fixed the matter of the names #it irked me to no end #reminder that if you use this in fics I want to see it!#any of it!#long post

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sysmedsaresexist · 7 months

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Why should I bother healing? I mean what awaits past the pain and sorrow? Feeling lightly better? I can just chase dopamine till I'll die and still have a good enough life

I feel like I know who this is, we have an unfinished conversation, don't we?? I still have your last reply and the start of my post in my drafts, waiting for me to find words that would help. If it's not you, I hope that user sees this, as well.

Friendo, don't let your current dumb feelings and silly brain get in your way of your future

Extreme positivity ahead

Fuck around on this post and find out

-the kids these days, probably

On a very serious note, I think we've all been there, where it just feels so goddamn pointless and you're so tired. Trauma survives long after the events that caused it, digging its claws into every aspect of your life-- even the parts that seemed unrelated and safe.

I can't give you the best advice because I don't know your full situation-- age, living arrangements, financial situations, education, all of that changes the conversation, but I'm going to try to give you a general bit of hope

Age and time helps

Even mental illness tends to improve with age.

As you get older, the brain naturally settles into a (generally) calmer, happier state. I promise you, with all the sincerity and genuineness in the world, even if you did nothing, in five years you'll still feel better than you do right now.

Yes, even dissociative disorders. (PDF)

Don't be so hard on yourself.

This won't apply to everyone, obviously there is a problem with mental health in aging populations, but... don't think that's the norm, or something to be expected, and you've already taken the biggest step by noting your mental health struggles early on. One of the biggest reasons that there is a problem in seniors is because there was very little early detection, and talking about mental health was seen as taboo. You're halfway there.

And as you experience more happiness and things just feel calmer, making positive changes becomes easier, especially as more opportunities open to you every year. So.

Looking back, I think my biggest mistake was looking at myself as I was, and looking at where I wanted to be-- or, more often, what I thought everyone else was. Happy, composed, financially successful, intelligent, popular.

And good god, I felt lazy. I wasn't chronically fatigued, I was lazy, I convinced myself.

Eventually, I started looking at smaller parts of my life and tried to make tiny, easy improvements, rather than anything big.

And with each tiny improvement, and with each year, I started to feel like it was worth it. And like I deserved to have a life I was happy with, whether that met anyone else's expectations or not.

Look, I don't know what kind of crack my grandmother was on, but I couldn't keep a house like that. She had six kids and a job back in the 60s, and even at nearing 85 she would still get on her hands and knees and wash the floor. That place was always immaculate.

And that's just unrealistic. And unnecessary.

My mother was the polar opposite, and I grew up in a hoarding situation.

When I finally got out on my own, it took a while to figure it out, but I settled somewhere in the middle. The idea of keeping the house as clean as my grandmother made me want to actually off myself. I am not exaggerating. The idea was daunting and terrified me. I would rather lay down and give up than find the energy.

But the closer I got to my mother's situation, the more I hated myself, because look at how gross I was.

Here's the truth:

Fuck. Everyone.

Seriously. I swear to god, one day, a lightbulb is just going to go off, and you'll realize that you never should have cared in the first place what other people thought or expected.

My home is crowded but cozy. I no longer look around feeling overwhelmed and disgusted with myself. I do what I can and I celebrate every little step.

It's my home and I'm happy with it, and that is the only thing that matters.

Life is like my house. Live it only for yourself, and do what you can. Celebrate all of the things you do, regardless how small.

Even if you did nothing, it's still going to get better.

Imagine how much EXTRA better you can make it if you just take it in tiny, tiny steps.

Like exponential growth of better.

Feeling just slightly better today makes tomorrow feel better, and the day after that, and the day after that.

Plus, think of all the (insert animal you love) that'll you'll see.

#suicide mention #tw #positivity #ptsd #depression #anxiety #did #OSDD

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triptuckers · 6 months

Text

invisible scars - echo

Request: nope Pairing: echo x jedi!reader Summary: the war leaves a lot of scars, some you can see and some that are invisible to the eye Warnings: mentions of war (big shocker!!), mentions of death, angst, negative self image I guess?? Word count: 2.2KA/N: this has been sitting in my drafts for too long. also im totally fine. enjoy reading! posts that inspired this fic: feral-ballad catchymemes nothingbutloveforyou

life after the war was hard. you had to constantly look over your shoulder. it's been a while since the war ended but it never hurt to be careful. you don't want to experience firsthand what the empire does to jedi who served in the war and managed to escape order 66.

you'd been traveling the galaxy on your own after getting a ship. it took a lot of hard work to get the credits to be able to afford a ship, but it was worth it.

your ship wasn't exactly big or fully up to date, but it got you from place to place, and it was entirely yours. while you loved having your own ship, it was hard to be alone.

long ago, when you'd served as a general in the grand army of the republic, you loved having people around you. it's been hard, being alone for so long.

you took work whenever you could, as you needed to eat and you needed to pay for fuel for your ship. some jobs were dangerous, others were boring, most of them you did on your own. you traveled from planet to planet, doing jobs for a few shady people.

at one point, in search of work, you ended up on ord mantell. someone pointed you in the direction of cid when you mentioned that you were looking for work.

so, you started to do some jobs for her. you suspected she wasn't always 100% honest with you and some of the jobs were tough, but you got paid. and though cid's bar was never packed, you were there a lot when you were on ord Mantell. it reminded you of 79's back on coruscant.

when you first went out on your own, you made a promise to yourself never to stay in one place too long. just to be safe. but you always found yourself back at cid's. you wouldn't exactly call it home, but it was a nice place to relax in between jobs.

it's also where you met the bad batch.

one day you were sitting at the bar, having a drink by yourself, when you sensed someone looking at you. your old instincts kicked in, and you slowly reached for one of your blasters. but then you spotted the figure coming out of hiding. it was a kid.

she introduced herself as omega, and started a conversation. she was happy and excited to talk to you. it was refreshing to sit and talk with her. you gathered she didn't know a lot about the galaxy, so she loved your stories.

over time, you saw omega more often at cid's. most of the times she was accompanied by a few men who she seemed to be traveling with. you had only seen them from afar a couple of times, before omega introduced them to you as her brothers.

you could tell they were clones. though they didn't look like the men you served with, you knew they were clones anyway. you never asked them about it, you never commented on it. they'd talk to you if they wanted to.

as you started to spend more time with omega and with her brothers, cid started sending you on missions with them. you got to know them better every time cid sent you somewhere.

after a while, you decided to do all of your missions together. you worked well alongside each other, and you liked the company.

it had been a few months since you started working with them, when one of cid's missions took you to a planet you were familiar with. you were silent most of the journey.

the others could tell something was troubling you, but they didn't want to push you. they knew little of your past, as you rarely talked about it. you weren't ready to share that story yet.

it was echo who was especially worried about you. you were never this quiet. he figured he'd wait til you opened up on your own accord, pushing his own worries away.

cid's mission hadn't been hard. you ran into little trouble as there was almost no one living on the desert planet. she had sent you there to retrieve some of the plants that still grew there. most of the plants were gone, but some still existed. they were worth some money on the black market.

of course, no one had told omega that was the real reason you were here. she was just happy to get the flowers and to see another new planet.

you're standing a bit away from the ship, looking out over the sea of sand in front of you. behind you, the others are loading up the harvested flowers.

you don't hear much of omega's talking, too busy drowning in your thoughts.

after a while, you feel someone's presence right behind you.

'you okay?'

it's echo.

of course it's echo. there was something unspoken between the two of you. you could understand each other with little to no words. it was just so comfortable to be around him. you often sought him out, even if you didn't have a reason to do so.

'I'll be fine.' you say.

echo is silent as he moves to stand beside you. he looks out over the desert in front of you. there's little left of the villages, a few ruins scattered among the sand dunes and memories in the heads of people that left long ago.

'you know this planet, don't you?' asks echo.

you turn to him. 'how did you know?'

echo smiles softly. 'I know we know very little of you past. but I can tell you've lived through a war. I know that look on your face. I've seen it everywhere, in everyone I served with.' he says.

over time, you had learned more about the bad batch and their stories. you know they served int eh army as well, yet you couldn't recall if you had ever crossed paths with them.

while most of them had been a part of clone force 99 along with their brother crosshair, echo hadn't always been a part of the bad batch. he had been part of the 501st, anakin and ahsoka's men.

looking at the horizon, you get the sudden urge to tell echo. all of it.

he's been in the war as well. he knows what it was like. he would understand. but it's all too painful to talk about.

the bad batch didn't even know you were a general. they figured out you were a jedi, but you told them you left the order before the end of the war. it wan't true. the truth was just too painful to talk about.

'I do know this planet.' you say softly. 'I haven't been here in years. I had heard stories of what happened here, what the empire had done. I just wasn't ready to see it with my own eyes. guess sometimes you end up at the very place you try to avoid at all costs.'

'was this your home planet?'

you swallow the lump in your throat. 'yes.'

'I'm sorry.'

'I thought I had already moved past it. but to see it with my own eyes. it's different. it used to be beautiful. this whole places was covered in the most gorgeous plants. now all that's left is a few dying flowers people sell on the black market.'

'it was weird for me to go back to kamino as well. it was still there of course, but the last time I was there, I was with my brother.'

'which one?'

you turn to look at echo. when he looks at you, you can tell the look in his eyes mirrors you own.

'fives. he didn't survive the war.'

'was he in the 501st as well?'

'he was. he was an excellent soldier. but an even better brother. I still miss him every day.'

'losing someone is never easy. especially during a war.'

'what was your rank?'

you're silent, fidgeting with your hands. you don't talk about the war.

'I'm guessing commander or general.' says echo.

'how do you know I served in the war?'

'you don't talk about it much, but when you do, it's like you were there. I don't think you left the jedi order. I think you're one of the few survivors. but don't worry. I haven't told anyone else. you can tell them yourself whenever you're ready. I know it's hard.'

'thank you.'

echo smiles at you and nods, then turns his gaze back to the horizon. you stand next to each other in silence for a while. you're thinking back to the war, all the friends you lost and mourned. what you had to do to survive after the republic fell.

'you know, I may be a jedi, but in the end I wasn't a good person.' you say softly.

'what makes you say that?' says echo.

'I... hurt some of my men.' you confess. 'I didn't mean to. they suddenly turned on me. all of them. it wasn't until later that I figured out it was order 66. but... I did hurt them. I did what I had to do to survive. at least, that's what I tell myself. but I hate myself for it. every night before I fall asleep I think of them. they're in all my nightmares.'

'I had no idea. when you're with us, you're often the most optimistic one. save maybe for omega.'

you shrug. 'it's easy to forget that violence is mostly kept inside.'

'is that why you're sometimes so exhausted? nightmares keeping you awake?'

'mostly, yes. sometimes I'm afraid to go to sleep. I don't know what's worse, surviving the war or being killed by someone you trusted. those men did everything I asked them to. they were my brothers as much as they were each others. and in the end, I wasn't there for them. I failed them.'

echo turns to you so he can fully face you. 'y/n, it's not your fault. you know of those chips now. they had no choice, and you were defending yourself. if you hadn't, you'd be dead now.

you don't meet his eyes. 'maybe. it doesn't matter now anyway. I have no idea how many of them survived. and if they did, they're most likely serving the empire now. doing stuff like this.' you gesture to the desert planet you're on.

'for what it's worth, I think we can still fight. I think deep down, you haven't fully given up. otherwise you wouldn't have been a high ranking officer in the army leading men into battle.' says echo.'

a whistle interrupts your conversation with echo. you look back at the marauder to see hunter waving at you.

'you two ready to go?' he says.

'be right there!' says echo.

'I don't want to come back here.' you say softly. 'it's too painful, brings back too many memories.'

'we don't have to come back here. I appreciate you for opening up to me.'

you feel tears welling up in the corners of your eyes. 'I don't really talk about it. there's a lot more. but I haven't told anyone that.'

'listen, I know your struggle. having so many painful memories that are too fresh to talk about. and I hope you win this war you tell no one about.' says echo.

you look up at him and manage a smile. 'thanks, echo.'

'let's head back to the ship, yeah?'

'yeah, let's get out of here.'

echo starts to walk back to the marauder as you take one last look at the planet that was once your home.

'echo?' you say, walking up to him.

he turns around, expecting you to say something. instead, you walk closer to him and wrap your arms around his chest.

at first, echo freezes up, unsure of what to do. everyone knows there's something going on between you two, though you've never talked about it.

but then he slowly wraps his arms around you. he knows he's done the right thing when he feels you shuffle closer and press your face in his chest.

the two of you stand there like that for a while. you close your eyes and allow yourself to soak up the feeling of safety and comfort.

when you finally pull away, you look up at echo and smile.

'now at least I have one good memory of this place.' you say. 'thank you again for listening, echo.'

echo smiles at you as well. 'of course. if you ever need me, you know where to find me.'

'thanks. now let's get out of here.'

echo motions to the marauder. 'after you.'

while you still didn't feel like talking about all of it yet, you know echo will be there whenever you do feel like opening up. it was nice to have someone listen, especially someone who understands right away.

you just know you'd be seeking out echo a lot more after this.

A/N: If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rulesHere’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading! Much love, Max/Marit

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elizmanderson · 9 months

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Hi again. You made a few posts about first drafts being ridiculous and cleaning them up later. And I desperately need more writers talking about the writing process as they are writing it (like 'making of' posts/ videos, any creator who does those gets me obsessed with them)

Anywho, I was wondering how your revision process looks? How different is your first draft from your last and how did you make the decisions of what to cut vs what to expand on?

I know for myself, my MC is a constant-overthinker and all of faer POV is stream-of-consciousness, and fae goes on a LOT of unnecessary but characterizing tangents that I don't know how to work with, given the corner I wrote myself into.

TLDR - Any info about your revision process would be much appreciated.

Thanks :)

hello and thanks for asking!

first of all, in case anyone is curious about the original post, it's here. also, there are many ridiculous things in this draft of NettieWIP, but that post was brought to you specifically by this line that I wrote even though it's completely tonally wrong for both this book and this character lmao

okay, revisions. this is gonna get long, but I'm breaking it up into sections that will hopefully be helpful.

general process

so the first thing is, my revision process and how much I cut or add is different for every project. but here are some general principles I follow. keep in mind that ymmv with any and all of these! you have to find what works for you. this is just what works for me.

1. finish the draft first

I will never finish a draft if I'm focused on editing while I go. I've been hardcore resisting with NettieWIP because I keep having ideas about how to make it better mid-draft. but I know if I don't finish the draft as-is, it's not going to get done.

2. let it breathe before diving in

sometimes I have the urge to rush right into revisions after finishing a draft, but I do force myself to wait at least a month or two before returning to it. it gives me the emotional distance I need to be able to make decisions about what to cut, no matter how much I like things that don't serve the story.

(again going to have to fight this urge hard with NettieWIP in particular lol)

3. read it before diving in

the one thing that stays consistent from project to project is that I always do a full readthrough before I start revising. highly, highly recommend this regardless of what else works for you! reading through my entire manuscript gives me a big-picture view of the whole story and how all the parts work together (or not), as well as what the problems are.

note: when I do my readthrough, while I do make general notes of my thoughts, I do NOT focus on line-level details or edits. which brings us to...

4. fix big things first

okay jk actually this stays consistent from project to project, too. when approaching revisions, I always start with the biggest changes and work my way down. line edits are the last thing I do, because I figure it wastes my time and energy otherwise. what if I put all this energy into line edits or scene-level changes only to cut half those lines or scenes later when I make structural changes?

5. this is the time to plan!

I'm a plantser, which is somewhere halfway between a plotter and a pantser. while the amount of planning I do before a first draft varies, I always dedicate time to planning before revising. the exact process varies, but it's kinda like this.

read the entire manuscript, making note of plot holes and problem areas

brainstorm potential fixes and where they might fit in

write an outline, synopsis, chapter map, whatever (for me it's usually either a synopsis or chapter map because I simply cannot with outlines)

6. start rewriting

...and as discussed in a different post earlier, I always start the new draft in a new document! you never know when something from an earlier draft could come in handy.

7. use beta readers

I typically do a second draft on my own, because I typically have at least some idea of what needs fixing when I'm done with a first draft. I bring beta readers in once I hit the point where the story's cohesive but I know more work needs to be done, but I'm not sure what that work is.

you specifically asked how I decide what to cut vs. what to expand on, and beta readers are one important way—especially for what to expand on. while I have a habit of overexplaining in many areas, things in my head frequently fail to make it onto the page.

(I think this is because things are obvious to me bc I thought them up. but readers cannot see inside my head, so they may be confused or think a character or plot point is underdeveloped even though I have a lot more information about it mapped out internally.)

if readers feel like information is unnecessary or overexplained or like I'm patronizing them, that's a potential area for cutting. if readers are confused, lack insight, or feel like a reveal came out of nowhere, that's a potential area for expanding. that said...

parsing beta feedback

while outside feedback is important, it's at least equally important to be able to decide what feedback to listen to and what feedback to ignore! not all feedback is good feedback. and even feedback that's technically good may not be good feedback for your story.

for example, I had feedback on the manuscript that's now on sub that was drastically different than the rest of the feedback I received on that same manuscript. I love the beta who gave it to me and I respect their opinion a lot, so I took this feedback seriously. but I couldn't make it work, felt deeply frustrated, and spiraled a bit over my ability to write a book even though it was far from my first.

then I got into Author Mentor Match which I applied to mostly because I need some guidance re: this feedback. my mentor basically said, "I think this is good feedback, but I think it would change this book into a pacier, more action-packed book. and I don't think that's the kind of story you're trying to tell."

and my mentor was right! I think this friend and I are simply interested in different kinds of stories. so as much as they love my stories and as great as they are at giving feedback, their feedback may not be a good fit for me.

usually, I like to look at patterns of feedback.* the more readers agree that a plot point is weak or a reveal doesn't have enough build-up, the more likely it is that I really do need to worry about that.

BUT if a single reader's feedback makes me go oh and I really vibe with it, that's also good feedback to listen to! as long as you know what the heart of your story is, you can follow feedback that helps your story do more of what you want it to do and do it more effectively.

*in my experience, patterns are most helpful when your readers share aspects of your identity. for example, I'm neurodivergent and queer. when most of my readers were neurotypical and straight, I'd get told "this doesn't make sense" "no one thinks/feels like that" "this is unrealistic." and I'd be told that by multiple readers, so I'd decide that meant I had to change the story, even though something deep down told me I was wrong about that, that my betas were wrong about that.

now, most of my readers are neurodivergent and/or queer, so they understand when my characters do or think or feel certain things. and at the very least, they never tell me a character is being "unrealistic" or assume that characters' feelings aren't based on things I have really felt. so particularly for marginalized creators, patterns of feedback may NOT be helpful if your readers do not share your marginalization.

examples of changes to my drafts

cutting and combining

The Remarkable Retirement of Edna Fisher was drafted over a year and a half as part of a last man standing-style writing challenge, so the first draft was 160,000 words. it was pretty obvious I'd have to cut SOMETHING, since I was planning on querying agents.

(recommended for adult fantasy if you're seeking trad pub as a debut author: 120k max word count. better to be lower if you're writing contemporary fantasy, while you can be on the high end if you're writing epic fantasy. other subgenres may fall in between.)

I cut...a lot, in some cases through actually cutting while in other cases combining things. for example, there's a scene now where a dragon attacks Detroit while Our Heroes are delayed there. It used to be separate scenes: Edna & Co. delayed in Detroit, with not much happening except the reason for the delay, and a later scene where they came across a random dragon attack elsewhere. additionally, the secondary antagonist runs around with an old friend who used to be two separate characters: the character he is now, and another old friend of theirs who was just sort of a generic asshole who didn't serve much purpose in the story.

thanks to cutting and combining scenes and characters this way, the story moves along faster, the stakes involved in those scenes and characters are higher, and everything is more tightly tied together. when I finally queried, Remarkable Retirement was down to just 98,000 words (published at 99,000 words).

similarly, in the book now on sub (Buried Things aka GroundskeeperWIP), I cut most of a short chapter from the antagonist's POV. I tried it as a prologue but didn't like that I don't do prologues in general although I know some folks love them, then tried moving it later but didn't like that either, and finally ended up just using bits of it that I felt were particularly useful in a chapter focused on a different character. I also cut a chapter from the POV of a friendly ghost/wingman from beyond the grave (but have it saved in case a future editor's like "you know what we need—")

worth noting that Buried Things wasn't massively overwritten. I think the longest draft was 104k or 106k, while it's on sub at about 90k (and the entirety of the last 4,000 words I cut from it was through line edits, not plot changes). however, both chapters stalled the story without adding much. what they did add, I was able to incorporate into other chapters instead.

expanding

while Remarkable Retirement's need for cuts was more obvious, some things were also expanded upon, especially with my publisher! my editor felt that the romantic subplot needed a little more build-up—not in terms of what happens or how it happens, but in terms of making it clearer why these two people start to have those feelings. similarly, a friend who read Buried Things thought it was great overall but that a particular character wasn't fleshed out enough.

in both cases, I think it was that instance of "things in my head do not always make it onto the page." when my friend had questions about the character in Buried Things, I had answers; those answers just weren't on the page. same thing with the romantic subplot in Remarkable Retirement. so it was a matter of taking what was in my head and making sure it actually came across on the page, although in other cases I may realize I don't already know that stuff and need to brainstorm to develop it more.

both together

in the case of NettieWIP, even though I'm not done drafting yet, I already know some stuff I'll need to cut and expand on! I find I'm repeating myself a lot in this draft, plus it's very dialogue heavy. so I'll need to cut back on some themes and emotions I keep bringing up, as well as trim down the dialogue and let the murder investigation not be entirely conversation.

conversely, there's virtually no setting description or atmosphere, so those are things I'll want to expand on in revisions.

tl;dr: in conclusion

okay this got really long because if you get me talking about writing it is impossible to shut me up, but here are the major takeaways for everyone playing along at home:

my general process: (1) finish the draft; (2) let the draft breathe; (3) read the entire draft; (4) focus on big-picture changes first; (5) plan your revision/rewrite; (6) rewrite/revise; (7) use beta readers

knowing the heart of your story helps you figure out what to cut, what to keep, and what to expand on

knowing the heart of your story helps you figure out what feedback might be useful and what feedback might not be right for this book

it can also helpful to look for patterns of feedback, but this is mostly helpful when your beta readers share your identity, particularly if you are a marginalized creator

thanks so much for giving me an excuse to drone on and on about writing your question!

#answered #writing tips #writing process #revision #writeblr #e's writing #the remarkable retirement of edna fisher #groundskeeperwip #nettiewip

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nocompromise-noregrets · 10 days

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⭐star⭐ how much do you plan when writing a fic in general - how much of it is like ‘no the tiny fictional people in my brain drive this actually’ (which relatable) - do you have multiple drafts? What thing have the characters/character done that surprised you that you loved the most?

Oh boy. I never plan, or hardly ever - the nature of the way I write rather precludes it, in that the characters talk and I write, it's very rarely a deliberate thing. I did a bit of noting down ideas when writing Empty Vessel, as it got so ludicrously big, and I probably need to do some planning for the sequel to Break You But You'll Mend, as it's going to require some plot (oh god), but mostly I just write. The tiny fictional people in my brain are definitely the ones doing the driving XD Relatedly, I don't draft - I write, I read over, I make small corrections where needed, then I post. The thought of rewriting something just feels like duplication of effort to me, and once I've written something, that's how it happened, it can't be changed. This is one of the reasons why I'm struggling with the original novel, I think - I reordered some scenes from the fic it was based on, and now it feels kind of tangled up, I'm not sure if it works better in this order or how it was before, and I'm very blocked on sorting it out. I could do with someone who has the time and energy to read it over and untangle it for me, but I'm very aware that's a huge ask.

Meanwhile, the first thing that came to me for there's a joke here somewhere and it's on me was Thranduil saying 'I'd marry you tomorrow if I could', and then I had to work out how the hell I was going to get there from the premise of the fic, which was based around a load of miscommunication and him not answering Bard's messages. So I just sat back and let them talk, and lo and behold, they got there. That particular 'verse has been very cooperative the last few weeks and I am enjoying it hugely. :D There are others, but that's the one that springs immediately to mind, given that it happened this week and I wrote the fic yesterday.

Wheeee, thank you for asking! <3333333 If anyone else wants 'director's cut' style ramblings, do send me a star or two and something specific you'd like me to ramble about!

#ask game #go on #ask me stuff!#my writing

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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 1 year

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a question for you (and Vin, if theyd like to answer this as well. i wasnt sure which blog to send this to, since you both co write a lot of stories.) ive been in a certain fandom for many years. ive made fanarts, done oneshots, but recently, ive been wanting to do multi chapter stories. half because i like to torture myself, and half because i fell in love with the stories you two write (my fav being Leech in the Rain/Bleach on the Brain, just because of how every chapter guts me like a fish). my question being: how do you accurately portray media characters, and how do you even make story plots? one fear that i have while writing is making characters flat, only giving them basic characteristics that would just boil them down. i dont want them to be obnoxious in personality, but i also want to convey the personality shown in their og media. another, more of a blank than a fear, is not knowing how to make a plot in the first place. do you use an outline for your stories/chapters? how do you even create conflict? very sorry if this isnt the usual type of ask you receive on your blog. as ive stated before, i take a lot of inspiration in yours and Vins stories (and i have no one better to ask). i greatly appreciate whatever advice you two can give.

Well, I'm very flattered, thank you.

General Advice

Most of my writing advice is stashed in this post.

This one, specifically, written by @therealvinelle addresses most of the questions you have here.

My main advice though, and I think what your blocker is based on what you're saying, is to stop thinking about what can go wrong.

You always have to start somewhere and with something, if you follow the linked post and plot out what your story should look like/what you want to do the only thing that remains in your way is sitting down to do it.

The first draft may not be what you're looking for but it will be something on a page that you can then work with to make into what you need it to be.

The hardest part, I think, is knowing where you're going and knowing your characters well enough that you know how they'll react to whatever happening to them. That last bit is the key to a character, in my opinion, not having a sheet or template but being able to confidently say "X happens, they'll do Y" or at least being able to sit down and figure it out based on what you know about them. Let the characters drive the plot and the story and they'll never be unrealistic.

Otherwise, personally, I write for myself. I write things I want to read that I know others won't give me or things I want to try my hand at. It's nice if other people like it, but I can't be here for them and at the end of the day it has to be what I'm happy with.

Ultimately what matters for your multi-chapter fic is if you're happy with it and if you feel it's portraying what you wish to portray. If other people like it, wunderbar, well done, but they shouldn't be the ones you're doing it for.

The Fuck is Conflict?!

The only thing I think not previously addressed is how to create conflict. That's thinking about it a little backwards, the conflict in a way, should arise naturally.

But let's break it down.

Conflict ultimately arises from the desires and motivations of the various characters.

You have an evil emperor who wants to be an evil emperor and you have the peasants who don't want an evil emperor: conflict. Edward despises vampirism and Bella wants to be a vampire: conflict. The Cullens all want to be a happy family but ultimately they have very different values from one another that are incompatible: conflict.

The conflict should already exist among your cast of characters. They have different ways of viewing the world, different things they want, or there's some obstacle in their way preventing them from getting what they want.

What you need then is a catalyst. Something happens that shakes up the status quo. It's revealed that an item thought unattainable is suddenly attainable, the evil emperor makes his first big move, a stranger arrives who highlights the existing issues within the family.

Something happens that causes the character desires, motivations, etc. to either clash or be set into motion.

For me, the conflict is the story. It's both what happens to set off anything, the problem(s) to be resolved or otherwise wrapped up, and what will drive the characters forward in the story.

Without the conflict, you have a tumblr post, not a story.

In that sense, then, conflict is almost as easy as "what do I want to even happen in this multi-chapter fic". If you have something, anything, happening that's going to cause issues for the characters, you probably have your conflict right there.

@therealvinelle, you got anything to add?

#writing #writing advice #vinelle #therealvinelle #praise

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