#i figure i fucking hate myself when looking in the mirror so whats taking my hair off gonna do anyway

[spylarman]

Why are all of the head shavers like 50+ bucks. Can't afford that shit...

#i wanna just shave my hair off cuz like im balding so bad #i figure i fucking hate myself when looking in the mirror so whats taking my hair off gonna do anyway #i used to love my long emo hair as a kid and now its gone forever and theres nothing i can do about it #i wish i wasnt me #personal

[caraphernellie]

cowboy like me // e.w. [chapter one]

summary: a modern day princess living under outdated royal protocol in which your own existence is forbidden. in a typical state visit to strengthen your country's relations with the united states, you find it harder than ever to keep your sexuality secret when you meet the president's daughter, ellie williams, and sparks fly.

wc: 2.1k masterlist

content warnings: fluff, angst, eventual smut. homophobia, governments, monarchy, politics. reader is specified as lesbian with she/her pronouns used for plot purposes i sorry, smoking, making out, femme! reader. u-haul lesbians fr. reader plays piano. ellie is a disaster lesbian lmaooooo. she's also super privileged and a bit of an ass. mostly based off of the british royal family in terms of royal protocol and all that shit, don’t kill me if things are inaccurate i’m not american, this chapter is more an intro to ellie's character and establishing tension

authors note: i'm so excited about this fic... but i might hate it in the morning so we'll see!! i've never read/watched red white and royal blue but it did inspire this fic (do not expect it to be anything like rwrb as i said i don't know what happens in it lmao). ellie's the president's daughter obvs. if your country doesn't have a monarchy just pretend there is one. if you're from the us then L 💀 play pretend

converse sneakers pelting across marble tiled floors with an onslaught of urgency, ellie makes her way through the halls. she stops at a mirror for a second, a muse in her mind– eh, good enough.

smoothing down flyaway hairs, ellie realises spending free time in the courtyard outside may not have been the best idea on a cool spring day such as this. the winter is still lingering, breezes battering the flag of red, white, and blue on the roof of the building as warm temperatures are still fresh. still- she needs as much a distraction as anyone else. as if procrastinating on something like homework, assignments, except the only thing ellie has done is make herself late to the introductory banquet of the royal family. all she knows is the president won’t be happy with her. 

bringing her wrist to her nose, ellie sniffs, though it’s less sniffing and more inhaling, trying to figure out if she has masked the smell of the cigarette she wasted or if she needs more cologne.

ellie’s caught by a housekeeper with her face stuck awkwardly into her suit jacket, furrowed brows as she inspects her own scent. pausing, a strained smile takes its place on chapped lips.

“he–”

“goodness, miss williams, you’re terribly late,” the housekeeper says, quickly approaching. “staff have been searching everywhere for you.”

“right,” ellie mumbles, straightening up her posture. “sorry. i’ll be on my way to the state dining room right now.”

approaching said room, ellie can already hear the fuss– loud and polite conversations, the snapping of photos, subtle classical playing over the speakers. christ, ellie thinks, how do i render myself invisible?

ellie’s worries ease the minute she steps inside, however, as the commotion isn’t around her own family today. it’s the royal family. and that realisation almost sparks up yet another mini freakout in ellie’s mind. she’s been looking forward to this for weeks, of course she has, a hot princess living in her home for an entire month..? that’s something she could get used to. but it’s real now, and just staring at you is sending a chill down ellie’s spine.

flash photography and yelling of the invited press is suffocating ellie as she ventures further into the room. she hasn’t even been noticed yet, thank god, so she decides to humbly busy herself at the table of finger food. until–

“ellie williams?”

a delicate voice smooth and sweet, ellie’s ears prick up to the sound of an accent unique and she knows exactly who this has to be.

fuck.

ellie makes quick effort to swallow the stupid cocktail frank she was eating and turns around, wiping her clammy hands on the ass of her slacks.

a princess standing right in front of her, of course these things only happen to ellie in her most cringeworthy moments. demolishing a table of finger food… what can she say? she’s an anxious snacker.

“ah-” ellie’s eyes meet your own and she gulps, extending a hand. “a pleasure to meet you, princess…”

get your head in the game, ellie. she clears her throat, putting on her famous, confident smile. and as you place your hand in hers, she acts purely without thinking, lifting your hand and pressing a kiss to the back of it. nobody was watching, but ellie drops your hand in an instant- is flirting with a princess the right move? even if it’s humorous?

your brain just about short-circuits, and ellie’s reeling. that was stupid, so stupid. acting on total whim.

the collar of ellie’s shirt feels too tight as she observes the split-second utter shock in your eyes, though she relaxes as you reward her a smile. and it isn’t that typical, media-trained smile, either.

“charming,” you murmur in response, eyes fixed on ellie’s piercing greens. however delighted you might be to be treated in this way by a girl like ellie, the way in which you hide it is effortless.

and charming, of course, is exactly what ellie is. messy, shirt creased and hair tousled and she honestly reeks of expensive cologne and faint smoke – but she has that handsome smile and that confident demeanour that the girls of washington d.c. fall for so easily.

“i hope so,” ellie says with an awkward chuckle, shoving her hands into her pockets. “that’s the aim of the game.”

you laugh similarly, politely, and make it as clear as possible to glance ellie up and down. “i’ll play.”

and the look on ellie’s face is plain silly at the least, her brows furrowed and eyes wide. “wh- uh..”

“say, it’s a little stuffy in here,” you say, gently fanning yourself, “you wouldn’t happen to know of any quiet spaces we could disappear to?”

ellie’s lips form a small o-shape as she processes the question. you want to be alone with her. a smirk crosses ellie’s face and she nods, “absolutely, your highness. my office.”

“would you be so kind as to show me to it?”

“of course, follow me,” ellie nods her head to the direction of the door. “we’ll have to sneak around.”

your heels click against the floor while ellie leads you down the hall, the sound a constant reminder to her that you’re actually walking alongside her. approaching a large door adorned by a gold plate with ellie’s name carved into it, she pulls a key from her pocket. and yet her eyes are on you the whole time.

the door clicks open and ellie holds it for you, only for her face to turn red when met with the sight of her office.

“excuse the mess,” she mutters, closing and locking the door behind the two of you. “i was uh, in here late last night. i had a speech to work on.”

“it’s alright,” you say, “some organised mess makes it homely.”

“right,” ellie nods. she’s beyond sensical thought now, just going along with anything you say. try harder. this is ellie’s issue, she eggs herself on too much, gets too overzealous, does things for the sake of doing them because her life has quite literally no direction if she doesn’t set herself these impossible dares. “just take a seat anywhere if you like. the couch is pretty comfy.”

ellie makes a pointless attempt to tidy some papers on her desk. she doesn’t necessarily do a lot of work here, though she enjoys being an activist, often writing speeches and finding causes to help others. though it did only begin in the first place as a way to increase the votes for her father’s party during the election- that doesn’t mean it isn’t genuine!

it’s just that ellie’s lazy ass needs pressure to do these things.

she gnaws her lower lip between her teeth for a moment, watching as you sit on the two-seater, eyeing the guitars along the wall of the office. “you play?”

“hm? no,” you say, watching ellie take a warm toned acoustic and sit beside you. “i’m a pianist, though.”

“pianist?” ellie chuckles, thumb stroking over each string of the guitar. “you’ll have to play for me sometime.”

you nod, watching intently as ellie begins playing a quiet tune. she can’t help but notice your rigid, straight posture. she can’t tell if you just have great posture, or if you’re uncomfortable.

but, noticing your eyes lingering over her nimble fingers as they pick at the guitar, ellie’s lips curl upwards just slightly.

she knows well when she’s got a girl worked up. she’d never expected the princess to be this easy.

“music is just beautiful,” you say with a small nod, again, that genuine smile small as ever on your lips insecurely. “nothing like it.”

“you think so?” ellie muses, and when you manage to finally stray your eyes from her hands, you meet ellie’s own soft gaze. “because i think… even the most beautiful ballad couldn’t compare to the solid view i got right now.”

you scoff, turning quiet as heat fills your cheeks. your brows furrow as you tilt your head a nod to the side, studying ellie’s features, searching for any hint of dishonesty. and it’s like she can tell that, with your gaze silently begging her to not be messing with you- she turns her expression more serious.

“you’re something else, williams,” you retort, though adjusting yourself a little closer. knees touch, and you don’t flinch away.

“yeah?” ellie grins. the room goes silent, ellie no longer continuing to play her tune. the guitar on her lap, she rests her chin over it. “something good, or something bad?”

there’s a more subtle smirk on her face now. she begins to move, setting the guitar down and leaning it against the couch as she shifts even closer.

“mmm…” you think for a moment, a smaller expression of interest visible across your features. “something that my head tells me is not a good idea, but my heart says is just fine.”

how the fuck did i get here, ellie wonders? she’s running on pure luck at this point. stumbled in late and somehow she’s got a princess way in over her head.

and ellie doesn’t leave you waiting a moment longer– the second you lean closer she’s grabbing your head and meeting your lips in a fervent kiss, one you gasp into and immediately lean into, hands falling into place with one on her chest and the other on the back of her neck.

pulling away breathlessly, ellie chuckles a bit and shrugs her shoulders, “eh- oops?” she looks almost embarrassed by her own reckless act. “sorry.”

there’s too much going on for you– just too much in your head. your first kiss, the first other lesbian you’ve ever met. her words get you weak in the knees, yet she gets just as flustered by her own actions which seem to only ever work on impulse. so you start laughing, and you can’t stop.

ellie herself laughs a little, watching you giggle at her pink face as you lean into the back of the couch and hold up a cushion to hide your face. it’s all snorting and snickering and ellie’s face is getting redder.

she snatches the cushion out of your hands and raises a brow at you, “if you keep being that cute i’m gonna–”

“sorry,” you laugh, “sorry-”

ellie can’t help but notice how much it seems like you really needed this laughing fit, the way it’s instantly relaxed you…

“that’s it,” she mutters with a chuckle, grabbing your hips and pulling you closer. “c’mere.”

the yelp of surprise that ellie’s movement elicits has her beaming, holding you on her lap. she rests a hand on the back of your head, the other cupping your ass. it’s indecent, indelicate to touch a princess like that, and yet you’re not stopping her. ellie’s already found herself addicted.

because this time ellie lets herself just go, pressing her lips to yours. she swipes her tongue over your bottom lip, grunting as you gasp. with your lips parted she slips her tongue into the kiss. she isn’t just kissing you, she’s devouring. she’s making sure not to leave an inch of your mouth unexplored, nor will she allow it for your body, getting rather handsy. every pretty little sound you breathe motivates her to continue, pulling you back in every time you pull back for air.

a hand slides under your dress, gripping your thigh, the other squeezes your breast before gliding to the curve of your ass, and she slumps into the couch. her boxers are growing uncomfortably wet and she needs to do something about it, hold you down on her desk and–

a key turns in the door and her eyes snap open, as do yours. not a single word is said but the panicked look you share tells all as you move back onto the couch beside ellie, smoothing down your dress. she grabs her forgotten guitar and moves it onto her lap.

and in mere seconds, the door opens to reveal a housekeeper who had used the master key to get in. and she’s clueless, though a little discomforted by the taut smiles you and ellie offer.

“sorry to interrupt you, ladies,” she offers awkwardly. “nobody has seen either of you in a long time, it was requested by president williams that we search the place.”

“ah,” ellie muses, clearing her throat before her voice can come out as weak as it feels. “i understand. we’re alright, yes, sorry, um… we needed a quiet place.”

sitting there with that prim and proper posture once again, your leg crossed over the other, you stare at ellie, resisting the urge to reach over right now and fix her hair after having ran your hands through it with desperation.

this is going to be an interesting state visit.

tag list (msg me or find my tag list in my pinned post if u want to be tagged!!): @dinasvampgf

🙈🙈 omg this fic..

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams #tlou2 x reader #ellie williams x fem reader #fem reader #⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ fanfic #ellie williams fanfic #ellie x you #ellie x yn #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x yn #ellie fanfic

[tommydarlings]

pairing: charles leclerc ; carlos sainz ; max verstappen; toto wolff ; lando norris; rbr!sebastian vettel x reader

warnings: mentions of smut, mentions of dacryphilia, mentions of chocking, mentions of fucking infront of a mirror, mentions of possessiveness, mentions of public sex, mentions of slapping, mentions of cum eating, mentions of fingers in mouth

check this out: my masterlist <3 // my ko-fi to support me! <3 // my PayPal to support me! <3 // my Patreon to become a member! (get access to +25 works) <3 // Save a Life carrd made by me! <3

CHARLES LECLERC

LOVES to tease you but HATES it when you tease him.

“You better stop touching me right now or I’ll make sure that you have no tears left to cry anymore by the end of the night, mon amour.”

Always dragging you by your wrist to the bedroom/restroom when you were a brat.

“I’ve had enough of your little game, ma jolie — one your knees, now.”

ABSOLUTELY LOVES to see his veiny fingers making their way down your mouth, likes loves to stuff your mouth with them.

“Just like that baby, take them deep down your throat, just like we’ve practiced.”

CARLOS SAINZ

Lots of chocking.

“Look at that big hand around you delicate little throat, cariño, so beautiful.”

LOVES railing you infront of a mirror with a passion.

“Look at you, baby, Look at your pathetic, little figure, fucking love it.”

Overstimulates you for fun if he had a bad race.

“Stay still or I’ll tie every single limb if yours to the bedposts, you got me?”

“Don’t try to fight it, cariño, it’s useless.”

MAX VERSTAPPEN

SO possessive over you. Like, if any other man even looks at you, he’s mad like an animal.

“You're body is mine, you're mind is mine and you're heart is mine, understood?”

“I own you, y/n.”

Always sneakingly touching you under the table at a dinner party in a restaurant or at a family dinner at home in the Netherlands.

“Shh baby, it’s okay — I got you, don’t I? Yeah, I do.”

Slapping you if you're being a BIG brat.

“Talk to me like that again and I’ll slap that pretty little face of yours until it's genuinely painful, okay?”

TOTO WOLFF

Always touching you somewhere, either your arm or your thigh or your palm, he loooooves touching you.

Showing everybody that you belong to him and will always belong to him.

“You're my perfect little girl and my perfect little girl only, am I clear?”

Choking you when you are riding him and thinking that you’ve got the lead now.

“Don’t you think that just because I let you ride my cock that you’ll get all the power, Schatzi, I am always gonna be in charge, you hear me? Always.”

A bit overprotective but honestly… you love it.

LANDO NORRIS

Loves to let his hands good along your skin when he’s thrusting into you.

“How did I get so lucky, hmm?”

“Such a pretty, pretty girl I got myself, don’t I?”

“You're.” Thrust. “So.” Thrust. “Fucking.” Thrust. “Beautiful.” Thrust

Kisses his way up your neck, always making you giggle in the process.

Secretly LOVES to eat you out and eat your cum.

RBR!SEBASTIAN VETTEL

Lots of eye contact.

“Look at me, liebling, c'mon.”

“Keep your eyes on me, that’s a good girl.”

LOVES calling you his good little girl.

“My obedient, little girl, that’s exactly what you are, am I right?”

Always strokes your cheek and puts your hair behind your ear.

“Shh, it’s okay liebling, I’ll take good care of you now, don’t worry.”

#fanfic #fanfiction #f1 #charles leclerc smut #charles leclerc headcanon #carlos sainz one shot #carlos sainz imagine #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x you #toto wolff mercedes #toto wolff x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris #rbr seb x reader #sebastian vettel x reader

[natigail]

"I figured hey, if I'm here, I might as well be honest with myself. So I dug into the archives. And I found teenage Dan. Do you remember HELLO INTERNET? There I was, eighteen years old, your average caucasian British boy with your problematic vocabulary, just wanting so desperately to be liked. I then saw myself age twenty, as a student. Not that I was actually studying anything other than the male anatomy. I had no plan. No prospects. I was in desperate need of a haircut. Jesus Christ. No, look, that was not a hairstyle. It was geometry. My hair was a square. I then saw myself age twenty-two as an adult, just trying to make my way in the world, taking any job that I could, no matter how inauthentic or degrading. And look. I don't hate these past versions of myself, alright? Apart from the square one, it can get in the fucking bin. Mainly, I just feel sorry that it took them so long to work out who they are. I then stumbled across the video titled Existential Crisis. In which I utter the optimistic nihilistic epithet: 'embrace the void and have the courage to exist'. Embrace the void and have the courage to exist. It sounded nice when I said it but for some reason it just didn't hit. I had accepted the absurdity of the world but at that time, I hadn't accepted myself. Looking back at it, it finally clicked. Anyone who has suffered with depression or any kind of trauma that seriously affects your self-worth hopes that one day you're going to have this sudden revelation and then everything is fine. I had my revelation alright. I am unapologetically gay! Don't know if you hadn't picked up on that, so far in the show. But just having this revelation did not immediately fix all of my problems, because I still feel that inherent burnt-on brand that I am wrong. And that doesn't just go away. No, I know what my problem is, alright. My problem I am always living for the future. Every day I am thinking about this dream future where all of my dreams have come true and all of my problem have gone and everything's fine. And so, every day in the present of my life can be this joyless unrelenting grind towards that future. But it's okay. It's going to come any day now, right? Learning to look yourself in the mirror and being honest about what you've been through and keep living in spite of that can be hard. It takes a long time and a relentless persistent resistance against the way that you've been trained to feel by the world. But that doesn't just mean you should give up. Because, sure, sometimes in life, you may feel trapped. I felt trapped by my sexuality. You could feel trapped by your culture or your community. Hell, you could be literally trapped in an elevator but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't try to get out. 'cause, sure, when I look at the state of the world, I am very tempted to just go: You know what - we're all doomed. But that isn't courageous. That is cowardly. It's the easy way out. Even if it is, as I hope you'd all agree, a really fucking cool name for a show. So that's the thing. You can either say to yourself, every day is just a discontent emoji or you can find the courage to force your inner smiling cowboy hat, ye-motherfucking-haw! And just try to find in everyday life. Which is why I made this show. So I'm not living in the future but I'm just right here, right now, with you, just trying to have one good night. And look. Hey. Who knows, huh? We may all be doomed. Death may be inevitable. But first, we get to live. Life might at times be a struggle but just being here, to put one foot in front of the other every day is living. So please, do not let the doom drag you down. You are important. You matter. Please, stay hopeful for the future. Appreciate life. Embrace the void and have the courage to exist." - Dan Howell, closing monologue of his show "we're all doomed" (2022-2024)

#wad spoilers #dan howell #we're all doomed #talking in tags #i wasn't going to do any more but why not immortalise this #mostly just saving this for myself because it always got me #dan quotes

[matts-k1tten]

𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐦𝐞 pt.5

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4

summary: y/n finds her boyfriend (now ex) Chris cheating on her at a party and vows to make him feel the way she did..

warnings: angst, swearing, let me know if I missed anything.

*not proofread*

pink: y/n

green: Mia

orange: Chris

blue: Matt

purple: Nick

————————

Nick

What the fuck did you do?

“Shit! Nick just texted me!” I scream as I look at my phone quickly wiping my tears out of panic. “Oh, well what did he say?” Mia asks turning to me. “He seems mad over text he said ‘what the fuck did you do?’ and when nick finds out that’s when you know it’s bad.” I say about to shit my pants.

“Oh shit.” Is all Mia said as she turned back to the steering wheel. “Well, let’s go home first and shower and we’ll figure something out alright?” Mia speaks again. I only nod as Mia starts to drive.

My phone then dings once again.

Nick

You’re coming to my house tomorrow at 3:00pm sharp.

“Who was that?” Mia asks keeping her eyes on the road. “It was Nick. He- um, said we have to go to his house at 3:00pm sharp.” I respond trying not to let the anxiety get the best of me. I start fidgeting with my fingers and bouncing my leg up and down aggressively as Mia glances to me and reaches over the console to hold my hands.

“We’ll be fine, we just have to go and get it over with okay? You can’t avoid it forever.” Mia says her eyes still looking ahead. I just smile at the side of her head.

“You’re my best friend and I love you so much, you know that right?” I smile at her. I see the smile on her face grow as she squeezes my hand a little bit. “I’d do anything for you because I love you and you mean so much to me.” My smile grows and I look out the window.

“How far are we?” I ask getting bored. “About 10 minutes, not that long.” Mia answers. I just sigh and look out the window thinking about the things that could happen tomorrow.

What would Nick say? Is this the end to my friendships with them? What’s Matt gonna say? What’s Chris gonna say? Will nick hate me?

Thoughts raced through my head as I stared out the window. “Don’t think to much. The more you think, the more bad it’ll likely get.” Mia looks at me for a split second. I just nod a bit and lay my head against the glass.

“I’m just….thinking about how it could go.” I say softly. I look over at Mia who looks over at me then back to the road. “Wipe your face, you have mascara running down your cheeks.” Mia smiles. We both start laughing as I grab a napkins and wet it with some water we left in the car. I sniffle a bit and look in the mirror to wipe my face.

Mia then pulls into my neighborhood and drives down the street to where my house is. Mia and I both hop out the car and to the door and unlock it. “Let’s get ready for bed, we’ll think about this tomorrow, yeah?” Mia suggests. “Yeah.”

-

I slowly open my eyes adjusting to the light flooding in through the curtains blinding me as I wake up. I slowly sit up and look around my room. Mia is on my bed beside dead asleep slightly snoring.

I check the time “1:33”.

I get out of bed and grab my phone to go use the bathroom and make breakfast. I do my business and head down the stairs to the kitchen and pull out ingredients for pancakes. As I’m frying the pancakes, Mia enters the room rubbing the sleepiness out her eyes.

“Good morning.” Mia says as she stretches with her arms going over her head. “Morning.” I smile back. “Oh! I love pancakes!” Mia shouts like a kid and sits down at the island. I slide her a plate of pancakes and put some for me. We start eating silence taking over the room. “You ready for today?” Mia asks. “Not really, I have to mentally prepare myself for it.” I reply with food in my mouth. “Chew that and then talk.” Mia laughs out loud.

I just chuckle and chew faster.

My phone dings with a next from non other than Nick since his brothers don’t have the balls to text me themselves.

Nick

Remember, my house at 3!!

I just put a thumbs up and turn off my phone and place it face down. “Nick just texted me reminding me like it wasn’t what I was stressing about all night.” I look at Mia who is on her phone. “Yeah, well it means he’s really serious about it then.” Mia responds not taking her eyes off the screen.

I finish my pancakes and put the dish in the sink. “Get ready we’re gonna leave in like 30 minutes!” Mia shouts after me. “Okay!”

-

Mia pulls into the boys driveway and puts the car on park. “Nick said the door should be unlocked.” I tell her. “I need you to prepare yourself for what’s about to happen next because it could be a gamble, he could yell at you, make amends, try to forget about it, fuck maybe even kill you!” Mia says making me laugh. “Like Nick would do that, Nick is smart he’d probably try to understand the situation.” I say sounding more like i’m trying to convince myself.

Mia just hums and gets out the car and so do I. I mean, I was shitting myself to say the least. When Nick gets involved, that’s when it gets serious.

Mia opens the door and lets us in and I shut the door behind us. “Hello?” “In here!”

Mia and I stomp up the stairs to be met with the boys sitting on the couch. Nick with his legs and arms crossed, Matt with his phone in his hands, and Chris sitting with his head in his hands. Once we make it up the stairs, Chris looks up at us and I can see in his eyes that he’s been crying by his red and puffy eyes.

I suddenly feel bad seeing that him and Matt aren’t even sitting next to each other instead, they were sitting on the complete opposite sides of the couch with Nick in between them. Usually they would be so close to each other that their knees would be touching and Chris clinging on to him. It broke my heart to think that I did this.

My face visibly drops examining the room. “Have a seat.” Nick says to Mia and I. We both quickly plop down right next to each other. Matt turns off his phone and looks at us. No emotion behind his eyes beside the slight redness and veins in them.

Nick’s face is stern and serious as he looks at us. “All of you, are childish. I don’t know what goes through all your minds but you all really need to get your acts together and learn how to be an adult. If you don’t, your actions will cost you your emotions like this. So I just wanna know, if someone cheats on you, you wouldn’t want to try to hurt them back right? Be an adult and talk it out and settle it in a mature way, I get that Chris cheated on you but maybe think out your options first.” Nick says coldly.

I nod and look down at my fidgeting fingers. Nick turns to Chris. “Now, Chris if you would have just communicated with y/n and told her that you didn’t want to be in a relationship anymore, that you could’ve just said that.”

Ouch. The words said out loud hurt even more.

I feel tears start to weld in my eyes but I quickly blink them away. “I-I wanted to be in a relationship with her I just-I don’t know, I love y/n and-“ “Bullshit!” I scream cutting off Chris. “Y/n be mature-“

“No! If you loved me, you wouldn’t even have cheated in the first place! This-“ I motion my finger in a circle. “Would have never happened if you would’ve just kept your dick in your pants and controlled yourself and oh! Better yet, answered me! Since you “love” me so much!” I scream at Chris anger suddenly surging through my veins. “Y/n!” Nick stands up.

“It’s fucking true! He could’ve just texted me back and updated me on the past two weeks of his life instead of ghosting me like an asshole all that time!” I stand up as well. “Don’t call me that!” Chris stands up now face to face with me. “Why Chris?! You are an asshole! You broke my heart and cheating on me with that fucking whore that you know made me develop my problems in the first place!” I shout back poking my finger against his chest.

“That doesn’t mean you could go behind my back and fuck my brother!” Chris shouts back. I fall silent not knowing what to say next. “I didn’t know you still loved her.” Matt says under his breathe so quiet I barely caught it. Everyone in the room turns to him. Matt stands up.

“If you would’ve been a better man, you would improve your communication skill and tell everyone in the room how you feel! You can’t just keep to yourself whenever you do so without thinking of the effect it has on other people!” Matt shouts directly at Chris. “Maybe, you should find another girl to fuck and not my fucking ex! Why would you fuck my ex in the first place!? I’m your fucking brother for crying out loud!” Chris screams at the top of his lungs angry tears now streaming down his cheeks.

Matt doesn’t say anything as he puts on an angry fist and clenches his fists looking like he’s ready to punch Chris. “Stop! What are you doing?! All of you, sit your asses down!” Nick shouts and puts his hands in between his brothers. We all listen and sit back down. “Y/n, you know I love you. Right?” Chris asks in a broken voice him now crying. I don’t look at him as tears start to fall down my face. I keep a straight face and look forward ignoring Chris as I shake and cry.

“Y/n!” Chris shouts next to me and attempts to grab my hand to which I quickly pull away. To that, Chris lets out a sob and I close my eyes and quietly cry.

Mia rubs my back as Chris just stares at me in shock. “Don’t talk to me right now Chris.” I say quietly in a broken voice.

I just couldn’t look at him. If i did, I knew I was gonna burst into tears so I just looked forward. Everyone just stares at Chris and I, none of us not knowing what to say next.

“I-“ I sigh harshly. “I’m…sorry, to all of you. I know I’m not mature and I’ve been trying to get my act up but I really can’t. I guess this is my nature.” I whisper to everyone. Nick sighs and walks over to me and sits in between Me and Chris. Nick places his hand on my back and pulls me into his chest as I start to sob uncontrollably.

Nick rubs my back attempting to make me feel better. “It’s okay, let it out.” My sobs grow louder hearing his words. I start to wail loudly but Nick stuffs my face in his chest to muffle me.

Hearing my sobs, Chris’ face visibly turns in a hurt expression knowing he was the one who made me feel like this. “You’re okay.” Nick whispers. I cling onto Nicks shirt and try to breathe.

“Breathe.” Nick says softly. I listen and take deep breathes attempting to calm down and pull away wiping my tears with my sleeves. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-“

“It’s alright, y/n” Nick cuts me off. I turn to Mia who smiles at me softly and puts her hand on my shoulder. I look over to Chris who’s staring at us with tears forming in his waterline. I glance at Matt who can’t even look at us. “This is fucking stupid.” Matt mumbles. “Matt-“

“Why are you always trying to start shit?! Why can’t you just shut the fuck up for once and just let everyone breathe without your constant complaints!” Chris interrupts Nick. Matt turns to Chris. “I’m trying to start shit?! Look at you kid! You’re the whole reason why this whole situation happened!” Matt shouts at Chris. Mia and I stay quiet as Nick tries to calm them down.

“Shut up both of you!” Nick yells. The two stop talking. “You two-“ Nick points between them. “Need to figure out a way to fix whatever this is before I kick one of you out because I cannot live with two idiots who don’t know anything but to argue!” Nick screams at them.

It hit me again. What I did will forever damage their relationship. I can’t help but to feel guilty, when Mia brought up this plan I didn’t think about the outcome other than hurting Chris, fuck. Why would Mia even bring this plan up in the first place?

Why did I do this?!

“I’m leaving-“ Matt says and tries to race to his room when Nick holds him back. “You’re not going anywhere until this is all resolved.” Nick says and sits Matt back on the couch. Nick sighs harshly and turns to all of us. “I just….don’t know what to do with all of you. I don’t know what you guys want me to do, if you want me to throw you guys in a cage and fight it out or what but-“ Nick cuts himself off by taking a deep breath in.

“I just need you guys to….sort this out yourselves. You can’t just depend on me to clean up your messes, you have to learn to become adults and learn that your actions have consequences. So, I’m not going to help you guys with this. You guys are on your own this time.” Nick says quietly.

It felt like a mission. Like the objective was to resolve all of this. But it was gonna be hard, considering that Chris and Matt literally despise each other and Chris and I made stupid decisions which led us here in the first place. I felt like I was gonna fail this so called “mission”.

“Think through all your options this time you guys, please?” Nick pleads and walks away. Now that Nick was out the room, it was just the four of us. I sigh and think about my options to make this all work.

But I couldn’t think of anything. I shake my head and mumble a quick apology and stomp down the stairs Mia trailing behind me.

Where do I start?

———————

a/n: hey yall. I know Matt and Chris would never fight over a woman but erm it’s just for the story and the plot so shush and bear with me. so uh yeah hope you guys enjoy!!

taglist: @sillyfreakfanparty @stasiesturn @braindead4l @sturniololol @idkwhatthisevenislol @blushbunii @cindylcuwho @jennss23 @tyslover @st7rnioioss @ilovechrissturniolo1

#chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo smut #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo angst #nic #nicolas sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo angst #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo smut #sturniolo fanfic #soundcloud #spotify #fanfic

[kitkatscabinet]

Glitch

Aemond Targaryen x Rhaenyra's daughter (no mention of features or father's parentage)

Summary: It wasn't supposed to go so far, just a one-night thing, but truthfully you had grown up loving Aemond and now you can't bear to think of a life without him, even when your families hate each other.

word count: 1.5k

warning: uncle/niece incest. I fucking hate that tumblr has turned me into this

Your relationship with Aemond had always been less contentious than the rest of your family's strained bonds. As children he had been a shy boy, reserved and somewhat ostracised by a brother and nephews for lacking a dragon of his own. You on the other hand had always been vibrant, full of fire and energy, the blood of the dragon running thick in your veins. The eldest child, willful personality a mirror image of her mother's at the same age.

Aemond had always intrigued you, his love of reading and solitude spent within the library not a behaviour you understood. Though it was his love and respect for dragons, which you shared, that really drew you to the boy.

It had been you that had taken him for his first dragon flight, witness to the longing in his eyes as Jace bonded with Vermax. The Queen had been furious upon your return but Aemond's shrieks of delight and the smile that had split open his face were worth all the ire in the world.

Dragons were possessive by nature, hoarding their belongings and loved ones for themselves, and your dragon blood ran deep. Aemond was yours, and the wary glances your mother would throw your way showed she knew it too.

Yet the gods had seen fit to intervene, cruelly ripping the two of you apart from one another. Aemond may have gained a dragon that night, but he had also lost you.

You don't live in my part of town, but maybe I'll see you out some weekend. Depending on what kind of mood and situation-ship I'm in

With a dragon of your own and an independent streak a mile wide it was no surprise you did not remain tethered to Dragonstone like the rest of your family.

You had spent your days travelling, immersing yourself in different cultures and fostering strong political alliances for your mother. Dorne, the vale and even the North had become accustomed to your unannounced visits, unsurprised when news of a dragon sighting reached their doors. Essos had almost become a second home to you, the expanses of unexplored territory calling to your soul.

Yet despite your taste for travel you had very rarely ever returned to King's Landing, only doing so to visit your ever-weakening grandsire. Upon these visits, you would only catch glimpses of the boy you had once relentlessly trailed after. Yet those few glimpses were enough for you to see that he had quickly become a man. Tall, lithe and ferocious, any traces of the kindness he had once possessed nowhere to be found.

Still, you could not help the way your eyes trailed his every movement whether in the training grounds or as he stalked elegantly through the halls.

All it takes is those short glances and you are lost once more to the haze of childhood infatuation. I think there's been a glitch. Five seconds later, I'm fastening myself to you with a stitch. Family rivalry and your mother's bitter words are long forgotten, all that remains is your growing love and admiration for a figure no longer within your reach.

The stench of King's Landing was something you doubted you could ever grow accustomed to. Even if the view of the city bathed in the pale light of the moon was something you looked forward to upon every visit.

So entranced in the view so unlike the harsh stones of Dragonstone or the vibrancy of Dorne you do not pay notice to the silent footsteps of another entrenching upon your space.

"Enjoying the view my lady?" startled at the unexpected voice you were quick to turn your head in the direction of the voice you had memorised long ago.

"Indeed my prince" you hummed quickly overcoming your surprise, a wicked glint in your eye, "though I find the view is much lacking in comparison to witnessing you with a blade."

Had it been anyone else you would have missed the sharp intake of breath, the slight twitch of his dexterous fingers you had dreamed about. Emboldened by the pretty pink flush that could not be hidden on his ivory skin you abandoned your place by the window to step into his personal space.

The space has become charged with tension, you can feel it tingling upon your skin, waiting for Aemond to close the small gap you had left. It takes a few seconds, and an uncharacteristic gentleness that shows perhaps the boy you had loved as a child was not completely gone, but eventually he closes the space.

He is close enough that you can smell his leathers, hear the heavy intake of his breath. As if compelled by an otherworldly force you reach up to cup his cheek, thumb softly stroking at the taut skin of his cheek. Aemond had recoiled at first, left hand grasping at your wrist in alarm. Upon realising you meant no harm it was heartbreaking how quickly he melted into your touch.

Aemond spends the night nestled into your side, both of you pretending you are not a prince and princess. Pretending you haven’t been torn apart by family feuds, imagining what your life could be like if you’d been allowed to grow together. Whispered words exchanged until the sun’s rays reach your face and Aemond is forced to quietly slip away.

You return to your mother longing for a boy you cannot have and you find that you’re not even sorry. Memories of a night so starry haunting your every waking moment.

You are unable to stay on Dragonstone for long, your mind will not let you rest and in an attempt to escape the lingering phantom touches you escape to Pentos once more. Hair dyed a deep brown and adorned in commoners clothes you attempted to sweat him out. In search of glorious happenings of happenstance on someone else’s playground. But it's been two thousand one hundred and 90 days since you've fallen in love with Aemond.

Try as you might Pentos proves to only be a brief interruption, a slight malfunction and you'd go back to wanting men who give nothing.

King's Landing does not receive prior word of your arrival, as such, there is no one there to greet you just as you had planned. While the presence of your dragon is sure to give you away, the path to your grandsire's chambers is one you have long memorised.

A quick confirmation from Ser Harrold that the King was resting alone and you have slipped through the doors before Alicent or the hand can stop you.

The sight that reaches you brings tears to your eyes, your grandsire's condition had rapidly deteriorated. The sound of his laboured breathing mixed with the stench of decay was enough to make you forcefully take a step back. Exhaling your nerves you stepped forward, gently seating yourself on the corner of the bed and taking one of your grandsire's hands in your own.

"Grandsire it's me, your granddaughter" you called, watching as a smile lit up his visage.

"Oh" he gasped, "what a wonderful surprise, you must fill me in on everything." Whilst you were impatient to get to the point of your visit you were still more than happy to indulge your beloved grandsire.

"What ails you my girl?" he asked, a clarity in his eyes that you had not seen for years glinting through.

"I must admit my visit is a selfish one. It pertains to matters of the heart. It has not escaped me that I am of marriageable age, but I fear I will not be able to fulfil the duties expected of me, not when my heart already belongs to another."

"Ah, a match your mother wouldn’t approve of then?”

“Neither would the Queen I’m afraid”

“But it is a good match?” The king probes even further.

“Possibly the best. Which is why I have come to you my King, should a betrothal announcement come from you then you they would not truly be able to deny it” you plead, desperation beginning to overtake you.

“Yes indeed. I suppose I must invite your mother back to the capital then, should she wish to see her daughter married to my son” he knowingly hummed, taking you by surprise.

“How?” Is all you manage to choke out through the furious beating of your heart.

“My mind and body may be failing me my dear, but I have not forgotten the affection the two of you shared as children. Daemon and Rhaenyra were the same. Now go my dear, I believe you have some news to deliver.” The dismissal is clear, though his smile had not diminished.

Heart pounding you swiftly navigated through the keep, intently searching for a certain presence. As if guided by fate it does not take long to find the object of your affection. Aemond is noticeably dressed in his riding leathers and appears to have just returned from the dragon pit. A blinding smile that has become reserved just for him covers your face as you rush to close the distance.

"Aemond" you exclaim breathily. Though your joy quickly fades as you realise you must now inform him of the incredibly rash decision you had just made. Unbeknownst to you in your worry, Aemond has immediately noticed your change in demeanour, the one slight curl of his lips dropping as he took in your sudden distress.

"Princess?" he inquired softly, reaching out to take your hands in his own once he had checked the two of you were truly alone.

"I'm afraid that in my selfishness I've made an incredibly rash decision Aemond. One that will not affect just me, but our entire family" you softly replied, still averting your gaze from his.

"I find it hard to believe that you would do anything to damage our family princess. Whatever you have done I trust it has been for the betterment of us all" he reassured, thumb absentmindedly rubbing soothing circles along the back of your knuckles.

"Come" you called, gathering your courage, you tugged him along after you wanting to be in the privacy of your own chambers. Aemond, who is simultaneously both surprised and intrigued by your actions lets you drag him along without complaint.

Closing the doors to your chambers behind you, you lean against them anxiously before finally looking up at Aemond's face.

"If you wished so badly for my company you needn't have dragged me through the halls my lady." You barely give him time to finish his line of thought before you lose all decorum and blurt out

"I have petitioned the King for a betrothal between us, he agreed." Shock quickly replaces Aemond's smug grin but you are not quite finished. "He wishes for us to wed before the end of the next moon." When you do not receive a reply, you wince, scrunching your eyes closed. "I beg your apology for not consulting you on the matter first, but I'm afraid my own desires got the best of me."

Aemond moved so silently that you had not noticed his presence in front of you until his hands had moved to cup your neck and face. "And it is me you desire princess?" he whispers the words wickedly into your ear, forcing a shaky breath past your lips. An action that was quickly followed by your tongue nervously darting out to wet them, an action that drew Aemond's dilated eye.

"Just as much as you desire me" with those words you finally close the distance, hands snaking into his hair with a punishing grasp that conjures the prettiest groan.

Just as you feel him begin to melt against your unexpected passion you pull away. "Make no mistake my prince, from the moment I first laid eyes upon you, you have been mine. Now the rest of Westeros will simply have to acknowledge this fact."

Fire is thrumming through your veins just as you believe it to be in Aemond's. "I thought we had no chance" he whispers softly, a reverent awe in his voice as he delicately traces your features.

You know your mothers will be furious but neither of you is sorry, you've fastened yourself to each other with a stitch. A stitch that had first come into being in your childhood, growing in strength as you aged. A stitch that not even the gods themselves could tear apart.

Taglist: @etherily @psychwardsiren @mihrimahsultan03 @bbyaemond @krispold

#aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen #x reader #house of the dragon #hotd #hotd x reader #house of the dragon x reader

[transformhim]

gonna commit to writing a few shorties, just to get myself back into the swing of it 🫠

I finally came to, unblinking but definitely conscious, looking face up at a whole lot of ass.

Wait… My ass..?

“Whassup, Donovan?” I heard my deep voice say. My body scratched its head right before it turned around to face me, noticeably hard as a rock.

“What a trip, huh?” My body continued with a cheeky chuckle, said with the same perky cadence as my roommate, Jiao.

Fucking Jiao, I knew it! He’s always been into freaky shit and always ogled at me. Always with the homo shit, too... He orders shit online like money meant nothing to him, and... sure, I’ll admit that I’ve taken one or two things from his boxes when they’ve arrived in the mail, but only because I’m sure with his family money he wouldn’t be missing a lot. And so what? His designer clothes looked better on me anyways, especially how they hugged my frame due to his much smaller size. I thought that’s what the box on the coffee table contained when I opened it up this morning... some more of his hundred dollar clothing to add to my growing collection... but apparently not. I can only remember opening the box and... my fingers barely grazing whatever it was that was inside... and then nothing. Apparently, something much stranger was going on. I couldn’t move my head, I couldn’t move my lips, I couldn’t do anything. I was fucking paralyzed.

“Weird, huh?” He continued as I blasted through hundreds of obscenities and insults, each of them blazing through my head with red-hot fury but none of them able to come out of my mouth. “For a first-time transference? It’s… Whoo, boy, it’s a doozy. Feeling stiff? Feeling confused? It’s natural, don’t worry. But… Jesus, FUCK boy, your bod is fuckin’ TIGHT!” He said, shaking out my large arm muscles and reaching down to pick me up with a giggle.

He picked me up with incredible ease, as if I weighed nothing at all. I felt my fingers curl around me snugly, turning me over this way and that in the palm of my hand. What in the fuck was going on?? Why was I fitting around in his hand like a doll??

“Let’s take you on a little tour, hmm?” He grinned down at me. He hummed in my booming baritone as we walked towards the hallway to our rooms. Jiao stopped in front of the door to his own room and turned the handle. “And behind door number one...”

He opened the door to reveal his own body... Was it sleeping? Entranced? It certainly wasn’t moving, same stiff-as-a-board, lifeless state as I was currently in.

“Look familiar? I’ll just keep hanging out there until you and I are done here. But now... Ready to see the big reveal?” He grinned back down at me with that same knowing, dickish smirk. He walked towards his bathroom and I could see the reflection of my body walk into the mirror with that tall, glidy strut Jiao always had, but I couldn’t see my own reflection. Looking closely, I could see that he was holding.. some kind of action figure in his hand? Or was it a toy? But with that pink, pearlescent silicone, it looked like it could only be—

OH MY GOD.

“Love this new look of yours, by the way,” Jiao laughed out with a deep boom as he wiggled around the shiny, pink dildo between his fingers. As he wiggled, my vision went to and fro with the wiggle of the dildo. That FUCKING FAIRY turned me into one of his dildos!!

“Don’t worry though, babe, you’ll get back this sweet deliciousness,” he cooed, running a hand down my firm, hard-earned physique. ‘Babe,’ I hated when he called me that. “But first… we have a lot to do together.” He brought me up face-level to him, my own face staring back at me with giant-sized proportions.

“Oh man, you and I are about to get so much closer,” a slurred with a horny grin. He brought me closer to my own face and kissed around me with my soft, pillowy lips. After a few more kisses around the entirety of my new form, he paused for a moment but then rolled my massive tongue out to guide me into his mouth. I could see and feel the dark, warm, wet, fleshiness of the inside of my mouth around my body as he welcomed the top part of my new form into his mouth. He pulled me out with a strong exhale, a giant webby trail of his saliva tracing his mouth to me. He stared at me with this carnal, drunken look in his eyes—my eyes. Like a lion looking at meat.

‘Oh fuck,’ I thought, knowing if my eyes could roll they would.

“Oh fuck,” Jiao repeated hoarsely as if he heard me, fishing my rigid, fat cock out of my briefs, tugging it greedily and intensely as he opened his mouth wide open, plunging me deep into his throat.

As I felt the slick expanse of my new form slide deeply in and out of the fleshy, dark cavern of his mouth, I could feel a whirlwind of sensations. I felt his tongue lap hungrily around my form. I felt the vacuum-like suction of his mouth and throat pull my slightly stretchy form longer and thinner as I felt more of myself slide down his throat. I felt the booming vibrations of his ecstatic moans pulse through me.

He mouth-fucked himself with me for a while until he seemed to be getting close. At which point, he quickly pulled me out of his mouth and lowered me down to his crotch. There, he placed my new form right next to my body’s shaft—a hot, thick, veiny shaft, if I say so myself, though I’d never thought I’d be this close to it—and began to pump me and his shaft together with two hands. With a few more moaning, piston-like tugs, I came face to face with my own giant-sized cock head erupting a pressurized geyser of jizz into the air, spraying out in thick, spurting ropes and dousing the bathroom mirror with noisy splats. His hips seized with jerking thrusts as the last of it seeped out of him, with much of the residual creamy remains coating the entire side of my new form up against his shaft.

With heaving breaths of air, he lifted me up higher again until I was face level with him, widening his mouth open and extending his tongue out, bringing all of me into his mouth one last time with a final greedy suck. He tightened his lips around me as he pulled me out, making sure to ingest every little drop of spooge that found its way onto my body.

“Fuck you taste good,” he smiled with more heaving pants. “Well, not you you, that just tastes like silicone and chemicals… but your baby batter? Dude, I could bottle it up and chug it.” He winked as he pulled my briefs up over my deflating tool.

“Good thing I got that out of the way, too, it’ll make me last much longer,” he reasoned as he stepped out of the bathroom and out of the door towards my own bedroom. “Oh yeah, don’t think this is all over, gotta make back all that money you stole from me over the years. I couldn’t think of a better way!”

He walked into the bedroom and slapped me down onto the low dresser I kept in my room with the suction cup on the base of my form. As I waggled lazily in my upright position, I saw him saunter over to my desktop, waking up my monitor and finding his way online.

I could see over his—my—bulging shoulders that he’d made an OnlyFans account… but using my pics, my likeness, my name, my everything. He’d been planning this for a while, that conniving fucker… He opened the webcam, went live on the account, hit record, and gave a little welcoming speech to his new subscribers. As he talked, I could see him flexing different parts of my body, flaunting my muscles. He lied over and over again about his gym routine and his favorite muscle groups to work, flashing peeks and flexes for his eager fans. Watching him, pretending like he was me, like this was the real me doing something so flashy, so revealing… it made my blood boil.

“Why don’t I just give you people what you came for?” He finally interjected during the middle of his welcome. He slowly lowered the briefs he was wearing, and slowly, eventually revealed my thick cock and balls—still slick and shiny with our session not 5 minutes earlier—to the rest of the world, swinging them around and playing with him like they were his. Standing naked in front of the camera, he did little poses with soft groans between flexes, working my body like he’d always been in it. I could see the firm contours of my ass from my vantage point and wished more than anything that I could do something about my situation.

“Pretty fuckin’ big, right?” He asked the camera, swinging my pre-leaking rod. Goddamn it, I hated him. “But I wanna play with something else today.”

He went off camera for a second, slipping quickly into his room before he came back with a bottle of something. I watched him pound the bottle into my palm, my chest jiggling with the motion, as he opened the cap and squirted something into his palm. He walked over to me and lifted me off the dresser, my suction cup loudly detaching from the wood top. He ran his other hand up and down my form, and I could feel the slick, sticky, jelly-like substance in his hand lather me up from top to bottom. Of course, he squirted a little more and spread his cheeks for the camera, I’m assuming to surround his hole with some lube too, and crawled on top of my bed.

He groaned as he positioned himself downward, extending my firm, round ass into the air, resting on my thick thighs, and looked into the camera with a sly, sexy grin.

“I hope you guys like this as much as I do!”

He lifted me up behind him until I was head-on with my own spread cheeks, my ass hair looking lubed-up and sort of welcoming from this angle. Well, I suppose there wasn’t any fighting it at this point.

He pressed me against my own hole, and I could feel the tight muscles around the rim and the warm walls of my ass surrounding me. Finally, he exhaled and my hole widened enough for him to plunge me in, immediately feeling the tight, moist walls inside my hole surrounding me.

Last thing I remember as I swung in a piston motion in and out of my own virgin hole was the loud, ecstatic, mumbled moans of my own body from outside, relishing every second.

#male transformation #male tf #male body swap #body swap tf #body swap #male possession #possession #inanimate tf #inanimate #nerd to jock #revenge #human to inanimate tf #muscle #giant #macro #soft vore

[c0ffee-stain]

HIII! i wanna request a five x fem!reader where they like hate each other but the reader always goes to five if theyre anxious or nervous and like when they saw the kugelblitz they like held onto fives hand for like comfort and five was like 🤔😳 and didnt let go or do anything then after (at the like party) five pulled them aside and kinda asked them abt it and theh got pretty nervous and their ears turned really red (five notices this) and they were like “just instinct” and walked away

then at the wedding (blackout drunk) five asks again and the readers like “oh yeah” and they both stare at each other and just start laughing

THEN LIKE theyre goofing around and they go silent and just stare at each other and the reader glances to his lips and then after a couple seconds they kiss and theyre like pretty awkward but then they both get the message so they kiss again.. and then they go to the room (AGAIN THEY R COMPLETELY DRUNK) and just pass out in each others arms

when they wake up the reader flies up from fives arm and is like “oh shit” then fives like ”what was that abt” “i literally hate you dont even.. what typa girl do u take me for?” and then five says “hey my head might be reeling and the world might be spinning but didnt we kiss.. like 5 times” the reader is completely shocked by this cuz they remember VERY CLEARLY and theyre like “uhm no.. what? r u ok?” theyre whole body is red and flamming atp. the readers like checking themselves in the mirror and five creeps up behind them, puts his head on their shoulder and is like “so why is ur lipstick on my chin and on the corner of my lips?” “cuz ur a freak” “ur face and ur ears are very red right now” THE READER IS ON THE VERGE OF DYING “..im hungry ill see you later weirdo.. dickhead…asshole.” five grabs the readers forearm and kisses them..🤭 the reader looks at five and fives like “do you like me?” “no fuck off” five points at the lipstick and they kiss him “maybe a little bit. or a lot.” “oh?” “okbyeseeyoulater” the reader walks out and five shouts “i love you” “SAME” the reader says while running down the hall to the bathroom.

THIS WAS PRETTY LONG IM SO SORRY!! 😞 HAVE A GOOD ONE LOVE YA!

Instincts like no other

F.Hargreeves x f!reader

The kugelblitz. Ball of lightning. Apocalypse no.3. Whatever you'd prefer to call the glowing orb of an abomination containing hundreds and thousands of mini blackholes collapsing into themselves at an alarming rate. It was living proof that everything we've attempted to do to stop the apocalypse was for nothing.

All the pain, all the sacrifice, all the bloodshed...

It was ultimately done for nothing.

Soon enough I was going to join the billions of victims that were obliterated by the kugel-waves, and let myself slip into the eternal sleep of death.

I knew it was going to be swift. I probably won't even notice the atoms of my body dissolve all at once. But no matter to how painless the death was going to be, I couldn't help but be terrified of that eternal darkness that was mere hours away from consuming me whole.

Absolutely terrified.

Well, that was if the plan brought up by Sloane and Five came to an abrupt failure, which would cause one of the largest and catastrophic kugel-waves to ever be produced, wiping out all remaining things in existence.

I held my breath and bit down on my tongue as I watched Sloane activate her power and levitate over the kugelblitz. She then began to manipulate its own gravity, condensing the orb. On signal, Viktor and Lila produced a sphere of energy to encase the kugelblitz and keep its vibrations constant.

I held my breath and bit down on my tongue. Everything could go so wrong so quick. The slightest alter of its vibration and... boom. We all cease to exist. I dug my nails into my palms, leaving multiple crescent marks that were deep enough for anyone to see.

I turned my head, noticing a certain Hargreeves standing beside my anxious figure. Five Hargreeves. One of the most annoying people I had ever met. The way he spoke, the way he moved, the way he looked. It all contributed to my burning hatred for the man-child, and vice versa. However, despite the hatred between the two of us, we had also formed an odd sort of trust while preventing the past apocalypses. One very different to the one we had whilst working as the analyst who assigned his tasks in the field back at the Commission. That was based on pure survival instincts. But this...

This was based on a trust that no matter what grudge we held against the other, we'll still be there by each others side.

It was calming and familiar. And at this point, that was all I needed.

Subconsciously, I let my hand slip into his and squeezed it tightly both from fear and the need to be close to someone that I understood. And ironically, he was the most complicated person that I knew.

Unbeknownst to Five, he served as a sort of safe haven to me. Someone I could go to and just bathe in their presence when feeling anxious or overwhelmed. Even something as pointless as an argument over the best sugar to coffee ratio would wash away my worries. But the problem was that I hate him.

How could I feel this way towards somebody I hate?

Probably just my hormones going crazy from being aged down to my ripe 18 year old self.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Hormones.

Expecting Five to give me an irritated look and push away, I was left surprised when he clenched my hand in response, grazing his thumb along my knuckles. I turned my head slightly to see a small tint of pink spread through his cheeks, and his eyes open slightly wider then usual in what seemed to be shock from both my action and his response.

I hate him and he hates me.

That's how it was meant to be.

____

All of us watched eagerly as a pop of the cork and a fizzle followed by a burst of champagne erupted into the sky. Ben brought the bottle to his lips and let the alcohol shoot into his mouth.

Everyone neared their glasses and filled them with champagne to the brim and danced, celebrating the end of the third- first for the sparrows- apocalypse.

'Another one bites the dust' played loudly out of the boombox which suited the situation perfectly. I smiled watching both academy's dance to the beat together and at last, putting their differences aside.

I brought the glass to my lips and tilted my head back, allowing the drink to go down my throat. An arm wrapped around my shoulders bringing me close, making me almost spill my drink.

I looked up to see Lila grinning down at me before saying in a sing-song voice, "Someone's got the hots for Five..."

Luckily, the music was playing too loudly for anybody else to hear. I turned and faced the woman, trying to play off my face heating up as the alcohol simply taking effect. "Oh, yeah? Is it Christopher? Or one of Fei's crows?"

Lila laughed. "No, not quite. For starters its a girl around his age- both physically and mentally. She has h/c hair and gorgeous e/c eyes. Ring any bells?"

I opened my mouth only for the words to get stuck in my throat. Finally, I croaked out. "I don't... I don't know what you mean." I averted my eyes from Lila, slightly embarrassed, only to see Luther perform his… odd crab dance.

However, she smirked and nodded her head towards the right. I furrowed my brows and looked, only to see the one person I really didn't want to talk to, approach me.

"Y/n, can I talk to you?" Five then looked up at Lila who was now resting her chin on my head. "Alone." He stated more than asked.

"I'll leave you two lovebirds to it then. Don't have too much fun-" Before Lila could finish her sentence, Five had already blinked us both out of the hall and into a random room with a small coffee table and a few chairs.

"Um, what's up Five?" I attempted to ask casually but failed.

The boy looked at me, analysing my features with a look in his eyes that I couldn't quite understand.

"What was that earlier, y/n?" Five asked, a hint of desperation in his voice.

Once again, the words got stuck in my throat when I tried to respond. What would I even say to that? What did he expect me to say?

“When you held my hand," The boy asked firmer now. He wanted- no. He needed answers. "What was that?”

My face started to heat up and the tips of my ears burned red. Five noticed this almost immediately, helping him confirm some of the many thoughts that had been stirring in his mind for weeks now.

“Just instinct, I guess.”

Five watched as I walked away in a rushed manner, leaving him completely and utterly shocked.

Just instinct? Just instinct? No, that was nowhere near enough to satisfy the Hargreeves brain. To comfort himself from his never ending thoughts, Five returned to the conclusion that:

He hated me. And I hated him.

That’s how it was meant to be.

And that's how it was going to stay.

____

“I pronounce you married as shit. Viva la apocalypse!”

When first hearing Luther and Sloane announce they were engaged within less than a week of knowing each other, much like everyone else, I thought it was insane to say the least. However, watching the two of them embrace the other, joy practically radiating off of their features, I still did think it was crazy. But, a good sort of crazy.

I think.

Sure, the universe was now doomed and half the people here were in the middle of an existential crisis, but when has that ever not been the case?

I didn't even have time to process the information before Sloane dragged me away and appointed me to be her maid of honour and assigned me all these tasks to accomplish in an unreasonable amount of time.

But in the end, it was worth it. Mostly because I was planning to get black out drunk... and another selfish reason. I was curious as to how an acquaintance of mine was going to look this evening. Was he going to be wearing one of his signature outfits that screamed 'old man' and 'no style', or was he going to be dressed similarly to how he used to when back at the Commission? With a striking black or navy suit with his hair slicked back and- I shook my head, trying to rack my mind free of all the impure thoughts running free.

Despite the effort, I was immediately winded when I first saw Five step out of the elevator, dressed exactly how I feared him to be.

I was screwed.

After the ceremony, everyone split into either small groups or by themselves as they went to occupy a table. I sat alone, letting myself criticize how careless I had become with my feelings- no, hormones, and how I let them take control of my actions.

I drowned myself with the bittersweet taste of alcohol trying to seek a sweet relief.

"Ah, y/n! How would you like to dance?" Klaus asked, dragging me by the forearm without bothering to hear my response.

I laughed, drunk, and let the man lead me to the dancefloor where the newlywed couple and Diego and Lila were dancing. He took my hands and started to jump around whilst shimmying. I copied him and laughed while the others jumped around, doing their own hilarious dances.

"Fun, right?"

"Yeah!" I exclaimed over the booming music.

"Hey, hey." Klaus hushed, discretely getting my attention. I furrowed my brows in response, waiting for the man to proceed. "I think Five wants to dance with you."

"What?"

"Yeah, he's been glaring at me the entire time. It's hilarious!"

I turned around, my eyes meeting the boys, before he quickly looked away and took another long sip of his drink. Klaus patted my back, signalling for me to go to him and went to join Ben.

I walked towards the lonely boy, stumbled actually from the large amount of liquor in my system, and stuck my hand out towards him. "Dance with me." I demanded.

"What?!"

I rolled my eyes, "Dance with me! It's the end of the world for Gods sake! Or are you scared?"

He raised an eyebrow and gave in to my request.

Five got up and let a cocky smirk adorn his features. "As long as you can keep up." He took my hand and pulled me in close, as a slow romantic song started to play. He placed a hand on my back and another holding mine.

"What's wrong? Never danced with a man before?" He asked, noticing my hesitance and the sudden tense of my body.

"Oh, please Five. You're hardly a man with that height. More of a passive aggressive toddler." I smirked, not missing a beat.

Five raised an eyebrow and tried to stop an amused smile from stretching on his lips. Eventually he laughed causing me to do the same.

Catching me off guard, he spun me around and dipped my body, staring at my drunken eyes, then to my lips and back. He finally lifted me back up and let his hand that supported my back, slide down to my waist.

"Watch it, Hargreeves."

"What, it's not like it's my fault." Five neared his lips to my ears and whispered, letting his breath that reeked of alcohol hit my skin. "It's just instincts, right?"

"I- um..." I cleared my throat. "I think you're drunk, Five."

"I think you're also drunk, y/n. Very drunk.”

“Piss off.” I muttered under my breath as I attempted to move away. But Five just pulled me back each time, his grip tighter on my waist.

“What was that about, y/n?” He squeezed my palm slightly, watching my face flush red. The boy chuckled deeply, gazing at my newly embarrassed figure.

Five couldn’t help but let his eyes drop to my lips for a second too long and let his mind wonder to how soft they'd feel pressed against his. Or how sweet they'd taste with the scent of bittersweet champagne lingering in my breath and most likely smeared on my lips. He wanted to kiss me all over, feel my body pressed against his. But he couldn't. However, the stunning red silk dress that hugged all my curves perfectly and the different liquors mixed in his system were only making it harder for him to deny all the feelings he had pent up for months- years even.

He hated me. But he needed me.

And unbeknownst to him, I was thinking the same thing.

As the song started to reach its climax, I noticed Five was deep in thought. "It seems I'm correct." I said, finally gaining his attention. The boy looked up to see me grin. "Little number Five got intimidated." I sang. My words swayed into the other at once, and my voice slightly slurred. My drunken confidence was back.

But unfortunately, not for long.

"Oh, really?"

I laughed and glanced at his lips as they formed into a small knowing smirk. I shot my eyes back up to see Five looking right at me with a look that filled me with both fear and excitement.

Lust.

The world seemed to stop spinning and the music and voices around us were silenced into incoherent muffles, until it was only the two of us gently swaying on the dancefloor.

No one else.

Just the two of us and our drunken lustful thoughts.

What a dangerous combination.

Five's hand slowly travelled to cup my face, as I placed my hands on the back of his neck. We both slowly pulled the other in, our lips merely millimetres away and staring at each other with half-lidded eyes. Finally, Five pulled me in unable to wait any longer, my lips hitting his for a gentle kiss. Five pulled me in closer by my waist so no space was left between us.

I pulled away and looked at the equally as flustered, maybe even more, Hargreeves.

"What just happened?" I breathed out, my heart hammering loudly against my chest. Whilst my thoughts were screaming at me to run and get away before it was too late, I secretly wanted it to be too late.

In the midst of the silence, we both grew eager to kiss once more.

"Fuck it." Five pulled me in once more for another kiss, one that immediately took my breath away. He was a rougher this time, and smirked once I started to kiss him back. His hand slowly slithered down to my thigh, making me gasp. I moved my hand to his hair, pulling it slightly, causing the boy to release the slightest groan. Out of breath, I pulled away and leaned my forehead against his. That's when I noticed we were no longer in the hall. Five had blinked us upstairs to the hallway opposite the endless row of hotel rooms.

We both looked at each other for a moment. Skin hot, breathing heavy, and minds intoxicated.

I grew impatient for the feeling of Five's breath entangled with mine, so I grabbed his tie and pulled him in.

We shared a long passionate kiss, our bodies slamming into nearby objects as we tried to find a free room. He lifted me off my feet, wrapping my legs around his waist. Five pushed my back against a door, only for it to slam open, making me fall back onto the carpeted floor with Five landing on top of me.

"Your ears are red..." He hummed. The boy placed a line of kisses along my jawline.

"Your whole face is red." I chuckled, half from the deep crimson hue on the boys face, and half from the ticklish feeling from Five's gentle kisses.

Five detached his lips from my jaw. "You're so beautiful, y/n."

I let a soft smile grace my lips and placed a flurry of kisses down his neck. "I could say the same thing about you, Five."

____

"Shit..." I blinked my heavy eyes open and looked around my surroundings in a daze. My head was pounding from last nights accomplishments of finishing every drink that I found. And I had found a lot. That's when my eyes set to the male besides me who was sleeping peacefully, his arms wrapped around me as if I was a teddy bear.

"Oh, shit." I flew up from his arms, definitely waking the boy, and got off of the bed in a hurry. I looked around the unfamiliar room and down at my clothes, and sighed relieved.

"What's with the hurry?" Five asked, his voice deep.

"This can't be happening." I muttered to myself. "I literally hate you-"

Making me jump in surprise, Five blinked in front of me, slight confusion laced in his features. Even when being shocked with the fact that I was laying peacefully in his arms, I couldn't tear my eyes away from how good his dishevelled hair looked.

Fuck, what is wrong with me?

"You didn't hate me last night."

"What do you mean?" I asked clearly aware of last nights antics and was secretly praying that he didn't remember.

"I know I was blackout drunk but," I watched Five lick his lips and drag his fingers through his hair, which I couldn't doubt was attractive. "didn't we kiss...over 5 times?"

"What? No, not at all!" I forced out a laugh. I faced a large full length mirror and scanned my figure while neatening my dress. I noticed how hot and prickly my skin had become, and everytime my mind replayed last nights actions, it didn't help at all.

Five, deciding to torture me further by playing dumb, rested his chin on my shoulder and smirked. "Then why is there lipstick on my collar, darling y/n?"

I swallowed thickly. "Because you're a freak."

He traced his index finger over the shell of my ear. He placed a small kiss on my cheek and said, "Your face and your ears are very red right now. Perhaps redder than last night."

I opened my mouth to respond, only for my mouth to dry up and the words to be lost inside my throat. I had to get out. Now.

"I'm leaving."

"Why?"

"I'm hungry, dipshit."

"You're not even moving."

"Well, now I am." I walked towards the door, only for the boy to grab me by my forearm and give me a short surprising kiss on my lips.

I froze completely, staring at Five with wide eyes.

"Do you like me?"

"No get over yourself, weirdo."

However, no matter what I said, the boy would point to the lipstick smeared on his collar and even his neck.

"Maybe... Maybe a little bit." Five pulled me closer, his eyebrow raised. He was clearly amused with how this was all going.

"Or a lot." I looked away, not daring to meet Five's eyes.

"Oh?"

"Okay! See ya later!" I ran out of the room, smacking my cheeks to try knock me out of whatever daze a certain assassin had put me in.

But the second Five raised his voice and yelled, "I LOVE YOU!", all hopes for me to recover were gone as I practically burst into flames.

"ME TOO!"

I couldn't deny it any longer. I love him. Always have and always will. I love the way he spoke, the way he moved, the way he looked. It all contributed to my love for a certain Hargreeves with instincts just like mine.

#the umbrella academy #five hargreeves x y/n #five hargreeves x you #five #five hargreeves x reader #five x you #five x y/n #five hargreeves #number five #five x reader #tua x reader #tua netflix #tua fanfic #tua #umbrella academy fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic #umbrella academy #request #tua request

[supersources]

interview with the vampire (2022):  episode 5,  a vile hunger for your hammering heart. tw:  murder, death, abuse, violence, blood, strong language, all vampire things.

* i can't die like this!

* let my dog live.

* it's a kill list in a teenager's handwriting.

* i'm trying to think of something more fucked up than this.

* they'll scale the sides of this building, force their way inside and paint the walls with his blood.

* don't look down on them, look in the mirror.

* he's an opinionated young man, he lives to share these opinions even when they are not solicited.

* what does he taste like?

* i didn't ask that.

* you were thinking it.

* he tastes like honey and pineapple, he stuffs himself for days before he offers himself to me. would you like to sample?

* i care for him more than he cares for himself.

* stay out of my head.

* you wouldn't find the corroboration you're seeking even if you could. we burned, we buried. and a convention city is not motivated to advertise grim statistics.

* i know what i'd do, but you've cut my hands off.

* don't do that, it's private.

* what night is it?

* i couldn't hear you over the tugboat.

* a whole lot of concern has been wasted on you these past months.

* did you read my other ones?

* well, you better hope and pray you taught me how to clean up good.

* you gonna let him do this to me?!

* i've read some passages out loud, i'm afraid. hurtful words for both of your guardians.

* i buried them, okay?! way out of town! nothing out there for miles, no one's ever gonna find them except maybe criminals burying bodies of their own.

* i'm never gonna forget what happened here. i hate you.

* get out of my room!

* you want money?

* i mean, it's always a straight line with you. yes, i am asking for your support in my campaign.

* sounds like there's a maniac on the loose.

* don't be too startled if the police come knocking on your door.

* i was in the middle of cleaning when they knocked.

* you often leave your daughter alone with access to illegal spirits?

* that's my daughter's room!

* oh, i'm getting ready for bed!

* have you lost your goddamn mind? overnight, in a jail cell, with no coffin. we all be dead by morning.

* we do not bring souvenirs into the house!

* so much wine in his blood... and beer, and whisky.

* you wanted her, you fix her!

* do you remember our life, how happy we were before her? an anvil tied around our ankles, pulling us towards the pitch-black ocean floor.

* who am i supposed to love?

* how are you gonna fix it, huh? which one of you is gonna fuck me?

* well, you're not my type, i like a fuller figure.

* if you could find other vampires, which you won't, they would shred you to strips because you are built like a bird, because you are a mistake.

* how about you shut the fuck up?

* he treats us like shit and you take it! why is that?

* you, as cruel as the devil ever made, to refuse me one love when you got two!

* i've been entertaining myself.

* i'll kill her soon.

* don't run off...

* why did you take me home? why not a hospital? maybe i'd have a handsome husband by now, or he'd be plain with a good disposition. that'd be fine too. i'd be sweeping floors, making dinners, nursing babies. maybe i'd go to church... you think on that some.

* i had no words for her, what words were there? "it all happened so fast", "i was trying to save you"... "all vampires are born out of trauma."

* poor dear. she wasn't held enough in between ritualistic murders.

* look, charlie manson wrote a couple of beautiful songs. still, he was charlie manson.

* is that all you think of her?

* it won't matter what your intentions are... it's the world out there right now.

* once you put it out there, they decide what it is. it can get away from you.

* i won't have her exploited.

* keep reading.

* keep talking.

* assume we are under suspicion. assume our finances no longer provide us protection.

* make your kills outside of the city, one a night. no persons of note... unfortunates, undesirables.

* we should leave the city, start anew, turn a betrayal into an opportunity. new york, chicago, los angeles...

* we should dismantle her room.

* she'll be back.

* there would be no roaring twenties for us.

* we were underground for seven years.

* (name), come home. i know i hurt you. i know i can make it right again.

* little girl... i'm talking to you. now what were you doing in the library? you're not allowed in there.

* i don't talk to strangers.

* you can read?

* just as i thought, a little thief. you're coming with me.

* what are you gonna do after that? after you turn her in, after it makes you feel like a big man, what's your next move, you think?

* you're not allowed to ride one of those on campus.

* this is our school, where is your fighting pride?

* you hungry?

* flaubert's style is so dense. the absence of metaphor is so striking...

* should we make it a night of the two?

* you sound like every pompous sorbonne student i've ever eaten.

* should i do it like you instead? read the first ten pages of every book and pass myself off as cultured?

* well, at least you're listening. i sit there thinking "light yourself on fire, see if he'll notice."

* you draw me into your gloom.

* it's your fault she's gone. if you hadn't pushed her...

* i cannot listen to this insanity about (name) one more time.

* i got to hear my own funeral. only couple dozen people showed up, most didn't have much to say. started talking about the weather a few minutes in.

* poor fella digging my grave lies resting on the family plot.

* what was he like, your maker?

* it ain't like that, he's more like a dad.

* oh, now there's three of us.

* got me wondering what it'd be like, ride with others, hunt in a pack. a little fang gang.

* you got a name?

* you don't kill like a (name), you kill like a killer.

* there are four pages torn out... did she tear them out? didn't seem like something she would do...

* when you do that, when you editorialize, however noble the reasoning, it calls into question all of the other shit you're shovelling my way.

* don't ask again.

* it could be her, but i'm the one who is presently standing in front of you.

* so, if my considerable considerables continue to be squandered...

* hello? oh, sorry... no, it's good to hear your voice.

* we're headed north... crash cleaned us out. and don't offer, 'cause i'm not asking.

* you look good.

* don't need that either, (name). or... whatever you are that took my (name).

* i prayed myself old, begging what to do about you. god never talked back, so... this is how it has to be, for me, for my family. you understand?

* i've come to apologize, i put you both in a bad spot. i wasn't right in my head... i am now.

* apology not accepted.

* so, quick stop home to do laundry before you fuck off for good?

* perused a few folklore anthologies and now you're going to cross the ocean to take on a society of monsters?

* if what i've read is lies, then tell me what's true.

* seven years and what's changed other than you need a housekeeper?

* the vampires out there are vicious... oh, but you know that already. who did you meet out there?

* that's it, keep 'em scared. that's his way.

* we took her life from her. we cursed her.

* come with me! come with me, (name)!

* i thought i could live without you but i was wrong.

* his love is a small box he keeps you in. don't stay in it!

* a thousand nights of sulking, and the first sight of her you're just gonna up and leave me?!

* please, come with me! let's be vampires worthy of your love!

* i fought myself a million times, fought my nature, controlled my temper... i never once harmed you.

* let him go... he didn't do nothing. it's me you want.

* i have patiently waited in vain for you to love me as i love you. just say it... i'm never going to love you. it would help me a great deal to hear that from your lips... your quivering, hateful lips.

* let go of me.

* anything for you.

#rp meme #rp starters #rp prompts #sentence starters #inbox meme #inbox starters #rp ask meme #starter prompt #roleplay starters #roleplay prompts #sentence meme #askbox meme #askbox prompt #ask meme #sentence prompts #mine: prompts.

[enid-rhees]

Platonic Carl x best friend reader who's super insecure about her body/weight. One day Carl finds out and comforts her about it. Reader also has feelings for Enid, but Enid doesn't pay much attention to reader (Enid secretly has a huge crush on reader, and avoids her because of that). Reader thinks it's because she's not pretty enough for Enid. But one day gains the confidence to ask Enid out (thanks to Carl's help).

If this is too much, I understand! Love your blog - ✨🫧

wing-man || platonic!carl grimes x fem!reader / enid rhee x fem!reader

warnings: a bit of angst, reader dealing with body insecurities

a/n: aaa another Carl req :D !! i absolutely adore him sm, so i loved writing this sm :] i hope you enjoy anon, tysm for requesting!

you knew you shouldn’t, but you can’t help it.

every time you walk past the mirror in your room, you can’t help but stop in front of it, and just stare in sorrow. you hated the way you looked. you didn’t know why you constantly brought yourself down by doing this. you just couldn’t help it.

you couldn’t help but stare at every insecurity you spotted on yourself, the thoughts in your head only making it worse. tears pricked at your eyes and you quickly wiped them away, but they kept spilling from your eyes and trailing down your cheeks. you wrapped your arms around yourself to hide your figure and looked back at the mirror.

the clothes you wore — you hated the way they looked on you. so you walked over to your closet and started to dig through the limited clothes you had. they were all over your floor within minutes, and you were crying all over again in the last outfit you put on.

why didn’t you look pretty? why couldn’t you look pretty like- like Enid?

Enid. she was the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen. she had the most mesmerizing smile, eyes, everything. and yes, you would admit it right now, you liked her, a lot.

but, you would never have her. Enid barely paid attention to you in the first place. you’ve had very few, small conversations with her, but they were nothing more than that. she would never like someone like you, you weren’t half as pretty as she was, you knew it.

there were even times Enid actively avoided you, so you were pretty sure that proved all of your points.

you sat on the floor in front of your mirror and cried into your hands. you didn’t realize that your cries were loud, because you jumped when a pair of hands grabbed yours. Carl sat in front of you, his eyes wide and frantic. “Y/N? what’s wrong?” you shook your head and tried to wipe your eyes but Carl still held onto you. “don’t do that, what’s wrong? please, tell me.” he pleaded.

“i hate the way i look!” you snapped, and Carl softly let go of your hands. “i hate everything about myself. none of my clothes look good, this mirror is a fucking nightmare. i just want to be pretty.” you cried out, not even realizing half of the words that spilled out of your mouth just then. “no one wants someone like me.” you added, voice going raspy.

“none of that is true.” Carl spoke firmly. you looked up at him and wiped away the rest of your tears. “you’re just saying that, Carl.” you spoke in a whisper.

“i’m not. you are the perfect the way you are, Y/N. there’s not a single flaw on you. i really think that you are absolutely perfect, in every way. in and out.” a small smile made its way to your lips and you reached your hands out to pull him in a hug.

Carl held you so tightly, rubbing his hands up and down your back. you held him even tighter, his hugs had always calmed you down, ever since you two were young. you met him at the Quarry, all those years ago, and instantly became best friends.

whenever you got scared after a hoard of walkers, or after a fight and you had trouble calming down from it, Carl was always there to take you in his arms and hold you until you felt safe. you couldn’t have asked to find anyone better than him in the middle of this shitty, new world.

“i’m still never going to find someone looking like this,” you spoke, your words muffled by his flannel. “you’re wrong again.” he said.

“i’m not.” you said back. you then removed yourself from his arms and leaned again the wall behind you. “the only person i want doesn’t even pay attention to me.”

“who?” Carl asked. he moved forward, getting closer to you as if you were about to tell him the biggest secret you knew in the school bathroom. you shifted in your place, “Enid.” you whispered.

“Enid?” he repeated back in a whisper. you nodded. you’ve never really told Carl you liked girls, it never came up in conversation and you had no reason to bring it up. but now you did, and you trusted him with that knowledge.

“we’ve only talked a few times.” you told him, “but besides that she… ignores me. and it’s not like she’s trying to hide it, she walks away when i show up. she doesn’t like me. Enid would never want to be with someone like me.” tears started to pool around your eyes again, but you quickly wiped them away before they could fall.

“i don’t think she hates you,” Carl said softly. “let me help you.” you furrowed your eyebrows and let out a small laugh. “with what, exactly?”

Carl shrugged, “asking her out.” your eyes widened as you stared at him like he was insane, “are you insane?!”

“no! you should go for it! you never know what the outcome could be. come on, i’ll be your wing-man!” you couldn’t help but laugh at Carl’s preposterous offer. “yeah, you’re insane. never in a million fucking years, Grimes. because if she rejects me then i will literally never show my face here again.” you said with not even an ounce of humor in your words.

Carl rolled his eyes, “okay, now you’re being dramatic. relax for a moment and think about it. i know that there’s a huge risk to this, but with the world we’re in now… don’t you want to take the chance you have? i mean… you never know what can even happen tomorrow.”

you knew what he was implying, and the slightest thought about it made your chest tighten. “okay.” you ended up saying. “fine, but you better be a goddamn good wing-man or i’m finding a new best friend.”

Carl snorted, “right, we both know that’s not true you asshole.” he said, lightly hitting your shoulder. you took hold of his hat and moved it down to cover his face while pushing him away, laughing just as much as him.

“from the few times you spoke to Enid, what was it about?” Carl asked you. you thought for a moment, staring at the wall in front of you.

“comics.” you stated first, “she likes comics. there was a day i was sitting by the end of the fence, reading one of yours, and she came up to me first. and then there was a few other times. but that was it.”

Carl nodded and paced the floor of his bedroom. it was almost comical, how into this Carl really was. you wanted to laugh, but he would just give you another lecture on why this was important.

“what else?” he asked. this time, you really had to think. there wasn’t much else you and Enid talked about. but… there was one thing. but you remembered Enid telling you that no one knows, so you weren’t sure if you could tell Carl.

“…can you promise not to tell anyone else? Enid told me no one knows… so.” Carl nodded, “of course, yeah.”

“she goes into the woods a lot. she invited me to go with her at one point… but i wasn’t sure how i felt going out there. but she does it nearly everyday for hours.”

Carl then stopped in his tracks and you watched as he began to think hard. “that’s it.” he said. you raised your eyebrows, “what’s it?” he walked over to his drawer and pulled out a bent comic and handed it to you.

“i don’t need that one anymore. here’s the plan, okay? i’ll help you find a new outfit, and by the way, you look great in everything you own. we’ll find a new outfit, you go outside with this comic and find Enid. you ask if she would like to go out into the woods, or wherever she goes, and you’ll give her the comic then. she questions you, and then you confess.”

you stared at him with shock. “wow, okay.” you responded, nodding slightly. “does that sound good? too much? not enough?” Carl questioned, and you put your hand up to stop his rambling.

“no, it’s perfect, Carl.” you told him. you stood up from his bed and took the comic from his hand. you turned it over and read the front. “oh- Carl, she loves this comic. she has a whole collection of them. this is perfect.”

“that makes this even better then. come on, let’s find an outfit.” Carl took you back to your own room and started to dig through your clothes. he picked up one shirt and a pair of jeans, and then slipped off his own flannel. “i know you like this one. you can wear it today. but try this on.” Carl left your room after that, giving you no choice but to try on the clothes.

you slipped the shirt and jeans on and pulled Carl’s flannel over the shirt. you looked in the mirror and sighed, you still didn’t think you looked good. it just felt… wrong.

Carl knocked on your door, and you jumped out of your thoughts. “come in.” you called out. Carl smiled when he walked in, “you look great!” you pouted and looked back at the mirror, “i don’t. i just… i really don’t think I’m generally attractive, Carl. i don’t know if i can do this.”

“stop.” he said immediately, “you may not see it, but you really, genuinely look perfect. but everyone else sees it, i promise you. you can do this, okay? don’t back down, i promise it’s going to be okay.” he held onto your shoulders and his voice soothed you, slowing down your racing heart.

you nodded and took a deep breath, “okay… okay.” you whispered to yourself. Carl still held onto your shoulders as he pushed you out of your bedroom and down by the front door. he handed you the comic again and you folded it to place in your back pocket.

“you got this, okay?” he whispered. you nodded again. Carl pulled you into another hug and the two of you stayed like that for a few moments. “thank you, Carl.” you told him.

“thank me when you come back with a girlfriend, yeah?” you smiled and hit his shoulder. “okay, go.” Carl said, opening the front door and pushing you out of it, closing it before you can turn around.

you sighed. you were really about to do this. this was really happening. okay… okay. you closed your eyes and sucked in a deep breath, exhaling heavily. you began to walk down the sidewalk, turning your head in every direction in hopes to see Enid somewhere.

you then looked over at the gate, and spotted her getting ready to climb over it. “okay.” you whispered to yourself, and began walking over to it. as you got closer, you jogged over to her before she started to climb. “hey… Enid.” you spoke, a little out of breath. she held onto the bars of the gate and looked over at you, “Y/N.” she said in surprise.

your heart started to race, “mind if i join you?” you asked, and a small smile then appeared on Enid’s lips. “no, not at all. come on.” she reached out her hand, and you took it in yours. you were sure she could feel how hot your hand was now that she was holding it, and you were hoping she wouldn’t say anything about it.

Enid pulled you up on the gate and you started to climb with her. when you made it to the top, Enid jumped first, and she looked up at you. “i’m here if you fall.” she called out. you jumped down and you felt Enid’s hands briefly touch your waist. “good?” Enid asked, and you nodded, face burning at her touch.

Enid started to walk and you followed her. “why did you want to come with?” Enid asked, breaking the awkward silence between the two of you. “um,” you looked down at the ground as you tried to figure out what to say, other than the truth.

“we haven’t talked in a bit, wanted to catch up with you.” you ended up saying, alright you weren’t quite sure if that would work. Enid nodded, “yeah, i guess it has been a bit. sorry about that.”

you shook your head, “don’t apologize. we all got shit going on.” you told her. “where are we going?” you questioned.

“there’s a spot i like to sit at. we’re almost there.” she said simply. after another few minutes, the two of you stood in front of an open area in the woods with a few branches lying in the ground. Enid walked over to it and sat on one of the branches, so you followed her and sat next to her.

Enid smiled awkwardly, “i really don’t… do much out here. i just like to sit here in silence away from everyone and read comics.” she looked down at her hands, fumbling with her fingers nervously.

“that’s okay… i actually had something i wanted to give you.” you told her, and it felt like time had stopped when she looked up at you. god, she was so beautiful. “for me?” she asked in disbelief, another smile growing on her lips.

you couldn’t help but smile back, confidence slowly taking over you, “yeah! i uh, i noticed you had this collection and i happened to have one of the comics… and me and Carl haven’t really read it. so, it should definitely be yours.” you reached into your back pocket and took the comic out.

Enid’s eyes widened at the sight of it. “oh my god.” she mumbled. she took it out of your hands and began examining it front to back, and flipped through the pages. “this is one of the last ones i needed.” Enid told you, her hand going over her mouth. “thank you so much.”

“it’s no problem, really.” you told her, scratching your neck. you couldn’t help but admire her as she smiled down at the comic. her smile was so contagious, you didn’t want to look away. you couldn’t look away.

“there has to be another reason you gave this to me… it can’t just be because of my collection. this is.. really- this means a lot, Y/N.”

your words almost got caught in your throat as you looked at her. “right- um..” you laughed nervously. “i didn’t only ask to come with because i wanted to catch up with you. i-i wanted to tell you something as well.” you could hear your own heart pounding, and you swore it was going to rip right out of your chest if it beat any faster.

you’ve never felt more nervous. “what is it?” Enid asked, turning her whole body towards you. you breathed in deeply. “i really… really like you, Enid.” you whispered. you watched as Enid froze.

“and this is probably the dumbest thing i’ll ever do, because there’s no way that… someone as beautiful and kind as you… would ever like someone like me. but you’re constantly on my mind, Enid, and i couldn’t keep it in any longer. i’m sorry if this made you-“ you were cut off with lips on yours. your eyes widened briefly before you closed them in utter relief. her lips felt so good on yours.

your body relaxed under her touch, her hands were softly holding onto your waist as you kissed. Enid pulled away first, but didn’t pull away too far from you. she laughed breathlessly, “you know, you didn’t need a whole plan to confess. i would’ve taken any opportunity to do this.” she mumbled, unable to take her eyes off your lips.

you bought a hand on the back of her head and pulled her back into you. Enid happily kissed you back. “and by the way,” she whispered against your lips. “you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever met. everything about you… is just absolutely perfect. don’t ever for a second think otherwise.”

“okay.” you whispered, feeling tears prick at your eyes. Enid kissed you again, her fingers drawing little shapes into the skin of your waist.

#divider creds : cafekitsune #carl grimes x reader #carl grimes x fem!reader #carl grimes x platonic!reader #the walking dead #twd #the walking dead x reader #twd x reader #twd x fem!reader #the walking dead x fem!reader #enid rhee #twd enid #enid twd #enid rhee x reader #enid rhee x fem!reader #enid the walking dead

[https-maxine-stuff]

Your best American girl. Songfic because I actually hate myself guys

Cedric x Female!Hufflepuff reader

Warnings: Implied smut, death, reactions to death, mentions of puking and grief.

If I could, I'd be your little spoon

And kiss your fingers forevermore

Arms wrapped gently around her stomach, his breath fanning on her neck as they laid. “Cedric??”

“Hm..?” He seemed tired.

“Do- do you think it’s a good idea?”

“Do I think what’s a good idea..?”

“T-The tournament?”

“..yeah I do..”

But, big spoon, you have so much to do

And I have nothing ahead of me

Y/n stared at herself in the mirror, her eyes narrowed as the dress hugged at her curves. “Fuck..” she sighed turning around her shoes laid ontop her bed. A few sharp knocks hit her door.

“Who is it?”

“It’s Cedric!” She walked over opening the door.

“You look stunning.”

“I don’t feel stunning.” She frowned, his hands cupped her face.

“What can I do that’ll make you feel how you look?” Her face contorted into this dumb smile as she came up with an idea.

You're the sun, you've never seen the night

But you hear its song from the morning birds

He was let out boisterous laughter as she pressed kisses to his face, neck and chest. “Really?”

“Oh absolutely! Can’t have other girls taking a gander at what’s mine.” She giggled, her red lipstick smudged against his skin.

“Merlin’s beard aren’t you just a breath of fresh air.” He pressed a kiss to her lips.

“I’d hope so,” she purred.

Well, I'm not the moon, I'm not even a star

But awake at night I'll be singing to the birds

As they stood outside the hall a few girls gasped and scowled as they walked past them, her hand firmly in his as he kissed behind her ear causing her to laugh.

“My love, I think it’s time we go in.” He hummed. The sounds of trumpets filled the silent air, her arm now hooked with his as they walked towards the door.

They were the first to start dancing, his hand on her waist, the other in her hand, one of her hands on his shoulder, spun and laughed, she was truly happy. In that moment nothing could change how she felt.

They shared a tender kiss at the end of their waltz.

“Y/n L/N, I love you.” He whispered.

“And I love you,” she whispered back.

Don't wait for me, I can't come

Warm lips pressed to her neck as hands tore at her dress, the sounds of his sharp breaths keeping her aware.

“Fuck you smell good.”

“Why thank you, it’s actually jasmine perfume.”

“I’ll have to buy you more of it.” His hands gripped her legs as they moved towards her bed, she was letting out squeals and giggles. His lips now on hers as they pulled each other closer. When they pulled away their faces were red and lips puffy. “Don’t you look pretty.” He cooed.

She bit down on her lip as he pressed kisses down her dress, she went for her zipper but he stopped her. “The dress stays on tonight.”

“Oh? Oh.”

Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me

But I do, I think I do

“You need me to do what?” Her face contorted in confusion.

“We need you to get into the black lake as you are..well the thing Cedric has to retrieve.”

“What if I drown!?”

“You won’t.”

“How do you know that, Headmaster Dumbledore?!”

“Because I won’t allow it.” He hissed.

“I bloody hate it here.”

“Watch your tongue.”

And you're an all-American boy

I guess I couldn't help trying to be your best American girl

The water was cold and icy before everything went black, the next thing she knew was awaking above the water, Cedric holding onto her. “Are you alright?” He stared at her with bewilderment.

“I’m- im okay, what about you!?” She was shaking due to the coldness.

“I’m okay! Let’s get onto the platform.” He swam with her towards the stands.

You're the one

They sat in the common room in their own little corner, his hand on her leg as they read a book together. “You smell nice, is that..honeysuckle?”

“It..it is. How’d you figure that out Ced?” She turned to him.

“I dunno, just a guess.” He winked.

You're all I ever wanted

His father raised his hand with him, a large maze behind them.

“Go Cedric!” She pumped her arm upwards just like him, he made a mini jog towards her leaning upwards as she bent down. “What is it that you require?”

“A kiss for good luck of course.” He watched as she rolled her eyes.

“Only for you.”

“Only for me.” A sly smile on his lips, her lips now pressed to his.

A release as she smiled “don’t die on me.”

“I don’t plan on it.” He winked running back to the rest of the champions.

I think I'll regret this

Two of the other champions are now back with the other students, Fluer and Viktor. Anxiety nipped at her heart and then suddenly in the blink of an eye the other two were back.

A smile on her lips as she whooped, the fanfare trumpets playing but.. something was wrong. Her brows furrowed as she took notice of Harry’s cries. “He’s back! He’s back!” She swore her heart stopped.

Cedric.. why wasn’t he moving..?

Her steps were careful as she walked down the stands. “..Cedric..?” His father was right behind her. “…Cedric.. a-answer me..?” Her voice was unsure as she got closer. He had no color to his once lively face.

“Tha-That’s my boy! My son!” Her mouth hung open as his father began to scream. “My boy!!” Her eyes wide as tears fell silently from her face.

No.

No no no.

No, he- he can’t be?

Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me

But I do, I finally do

Screams tore at her body as things were tossed around her room she was gasping and crying. It didn’t feel real, like someone had gone through her and took everything, every organ, every touch and every word she wanted so badly to say but couldn’t. She was hunched over her bed.

“Please Y/N..” Professor Sprout held a comforting hand on her back as sobs wracked her body.

“No no no, I-I can’t I can’t.”

“But you have to..” she stared at her professor through tearful eyes.

And you're an all-American boy

I guess I couldn't help trying to be the best American girl

Y/N sat, blankly staring at the ground as Dumbledore talked about Cedric, about his bravery, about his love, about how humble he was. She felt like puking in all honesty.

As if this wasn’t enough she could feel the stares of pity behind her. She furrowed her brows as she looked down.

Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me

His robe laid on her bed, the prefect badge she made him laid next to it. Tears filled her eyes as she held the robe close to her nose just to inhale what was left of his scent, tears leaving her face. “..come back..please…”

But I do, I think I do

#cedric diggory smut #cedric diggory #cedric diggori x reader angst #cedric diggory x reader #implied smut #angst #soulmates #right person not enough time #harry potter goblet of fire #yule ball #kiss stains #make out #Spotify

[diffuseidiotskeletalhyperostosis]

bonsoir trickriders!

as promised, it is my honour to present the first ~1.5k words of the fourth chapter of poison oak: the end of paralysis! you can read it below the line break. or dont, im not your dad

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”

In the dim beam of his flashlight, Green Oak saw Red Isamu for the first time in eight years. It was a feeling he hadn’t felt since he was a child- like his emotions were too big for his body. When he was a kid, he always figured that one day, he’d grow into them, tall enough to hold all of the pains he was struggling to house. Evidently, he hadn’t grown enough, as the feelings under his skin tried to push their way out. It was confusing and terrifying, like watching a snake eat its own tail; he didn’t understand it, and he wasn’t quite sure that he wanted to. 

Sure, his first words had been a tad… harsh, but for once, Green didn’t care about his tone. He didn’t give a shit what Red wanted to hear- what words would make everything okay the quickest. For eight whole years, Green had been thinking of what he’d say to Red if he had the chance, and now that he had finally found him, Red was going to listen. 

“You ruined my life, Red. I spent the last eight years thinking that I had killed you. Do you have any idea what that’s like? To have to wake up every day and look in the mirror to see the guy who killed your best friend? I’ve felt like a murderer for eight years, and turns out you’ve been up here the whole time playing mountain man! Every night for seven years, I had nightmares of finding your dead body. Seven fucking years! I’ve been tearing myself apart trying to find pieces of you, over and over and over again and what have you been doing? Whittling?” 

Green’s vision was starting to blur, either a symptom of his mounting emotion or empty stomach, but in the light cast by his flashlight, he saw Red signing to him. He made out the signs ‘Green’ and ‘please’  before clicking off his light and deciding whatever it was that Red was trying to tell him could wait. 

“I don’t care, Red! I don’t care what you think because that's what you gave up when you fucking abandoned me. And it isn’t just me, either. If you don’t care about me, that’s whatever, but how could you do this to Delia? Your mother gave you everything, and you just took it and ran. You don’t think that it would hurt her? First her husband, then her two best friends, and then her only son? Did you think that she would just get over that? Delia hasn’t felt anything other than grief for eight fucking years, Red. Eight years, by the way, that she still spent raising Daisy and me! That woman is an angel, and you broke her heart. I could care less about my feelings, but you can’t look me in the eyes and tell me that she deserves even half of what you did to her.” Green was closer to Red than he had been a minute ago, which was odd, because he didn’t remember walking forward, and Red sure as hell hadn’t moved. Whatever, you could have told Green that he was briefly gifted the ability of teleportation and he wouldn’t have given a shit. The only thoughts he could possibly think were about letting his former best friend know exactly how badly he had fucked up.

“Do you wanna know the last thing my grandfather said to me? He asked me what I did to make you leave, and that was the morning you ran away. He hasn’t spoken to me in eight years- he hasn’t even so much as looked at me. Blaming myself for your death was one thing, but having to know that Professor Oak did, too? I’m not mad at myself anymore, but he’ll never forgive me. All I ever wanted was for him to be proud of me, and instead I have to live knowing that he hates me for taking you away from him. Eight fucking years of him looking over my head like I didn’t exist- were the five years of him preferring you not enough? Did you have to take everything from me?” 

Red’s hands were moving at a pace that would be difficult for Green to interpret even without the tears in his eyes obscuring his vision. Adding in that obfuscation meant that there was no way in Distortion that Green would have been able to see Red’s pleading- how his right fist was pressed over his heart, rubbing clockwise circles over and over again: sorry. Since Green had no clue what Red was going on about, he jumped to another point he had been wanting to make. 

“And I know it isn’t fair to blame you for that, but I still do, because if there's one thing living in your shadow has taught me, it’s that nothing is ever fair. You couldn’t even let me be Champion for a day before you had to swoop in and prove to the world that you’re better than me. And then once you took the one thing I wanted more than anything else, you didn’t even hold on to it! What’s wrong with you? Do you even realize how lucky you were? You had everything I’ve ever wanted- you were the Champion. You had a loving guardian who supported you and wanted the best for you- everybody did. Even Oak. And what did you do with that? You fucked off up a mountain- which, by the way, left the League in shambles for eight years. I don’t even know why I’m telling you this, because obviously it’s too much to ask of you to care about your family, let alone a stranger, but Lance spent nearly eight years working himself to the bone cleaning up the mess you made. And guess what? Even while running two regions’ Pokémon Leagues by himself, he still makes time to visit me, because unlike a certain snapback wearing jackass, he actually loves me! He asked me to take over the Viridian Gym when I was twelve, and when I said no, he held the position open for me until I was sixteen, when I finally gave up on you coming back home. I spent six fucking years living in my grandfather’s house while he actively hated my guts, even though every day under the same roof as him made me feel like I was dying. All because I was waiting for you to come back, because I thought if I moved, you wouldn’t know where to find me, and then you’d leave again. I wasted six years of my life waiting around for you. Do you wanna know why? Do you, Red?” 

Green’s trembling hands dug around in his pockets, fumbling around to find a folded up piece of printer paper amongst the cigarette packs and gum wrappers. With a crushing grip, he pulled the paper out, unfolding it and shoving it in Red’s face. The words, though the ink had slightly faded with time, could never be forgotten. They had written themselves on Green’s heart:

1. Friendship comes first

2. Winning isn’t everything

3. Never leave your rival behind

“You promised that you’d never leave me behind, Red, and then you did. Everybody thought you died, but I refused to give up on you because you promised you’d stay with me no matter what. I didn’t care about the Championship or Oak or any of that bullshit- I just wanted my friend back. I was so sure that wherever you were, there had to be something keeping you from me and it was only a matter of time before you came back. Turns out, the whole time you were roasting marshmallows by a campfire! You were up on top of the highest fucking peak on the continent being selfish, while the rest of us rotted away without you. And don’t even pretend like you have any shame about it, because if you actually cared, you would have come back ages ago.” 

At that point, Green had once again inexplicably moved even closer to Red, so much so that, if he wanted, he could reach out and touch him- if he had control of his body, that is. Now that the distance had closed, Green was having a harder time ignoring Red’s signing: Green, please, and listen over and over again. The light from the fire allowed Green a visual clarity that he had previously lacked, like a veil had been lifted from his teary eyes. Red’s face bore a unique mixture of desperation and pain, as if he was begging for his life instead of for Green to hear him out. It almost softened his resolve, how pitiful Red looked. 

Instead of giving in, Green closed his eyes. 

“I don’t care! I don’t fucking care how you feel, Red. Have you ever thought about how I feel? Have you thought about how other people feel? Has it ever crossed your mind that what you do affects other people? Do you even care? I don’t think you ever did, Red. Or is it that we just aren’t worth it to you?  I don’t think you ever gave a shit about me, because if you did, you wouldn’t have left me behind. I loved you, Red, more than anything, and I was stupid enough to believe you loved me back, and-”

Green’s screaming was cut off by blinking lights. 

--. .-. . . -. Green

#reguri #red x green #red pokemon #green pokemon #namelessshipping #originalshipping #trainer red #champion red #green oak

[yaknowlikenyah]

Dude okay this may sound stupid and silly but how you got the confidence to just, find yourself hot and sexy?? Like..I don’t have that! I just look at myself and think ‘eww stinky’, there’s always something that I don’t like, I’m either too skinny or bloted or something stupid.

I’m sorry if this comes off like a rant or a vent, I’m just genuinely curious how you can have so much confidence, it’s spooky to someone with barely any.

Incase you do end up reading this, I hope you are okay! Apologies for the probably strange ask, and here, take a apple juice :)

🧃

I may be a nsfw blog but part of my jokey little ‘Big Brother’ thing is that you can practically always come to me for advice. If it’s coming from a place of wanting to improve yourself and just having someone to talk to, I’m here to help.

Answer under the cut cause oh boy. This will be long and painfully rambley and involve a pic of me as a High schooler.

SO. Keep in mind, this is something I’ve been doing for years. This is not an instant thing, but this is general advice. I’m trans. Right? I experience dysphoria and especially when I was a baby 16 year old, it hit HARD.

I, as a teen, did stumble upon accidentally CBTing myself. Not in a bland ‘you are beautiful you are powerful’ way, but I caught that I was getting crazy self conscious and actively started to try and fix myself. The way I did this? Simple.

Pretty birding.

What is pretty birding you ask? You look in the mirror and instead of looking at the whole of yourself, you look for little pieces of yourself that you like. Don’t like how your skin looks? Look at your eyes as a sole item. Look at your hair. Find something you do like.

So lets look at a pic of me when I was 16.

This is I think?? The moment I started pretty birding. But I wasn’t confident. I didn’t realize my hair was curly so it was always frizzy, my acne was insane and overall, I just felt kinda gross cause damn. Who doesn’t. What I did was I started looking for things I like. I forced myself to look in the mirror and compliment myself every time I felt gross. Sometimes it would just be as simple as WOW I’m hot. I didn’t think it at the time, but it helped. Ya know? And over time it became a sort of ritual. Just like joking about having a piss kink, if you joke about being soooo hot and sexy then it will become something you slowly believe.

This also became a thing for seeing myself as sexually attractive, (which lead me down some weird paths but fuck it. What 16 year old isn’t curious about that shit)

NOW. the pros of this. My confidence went up, I genuinely started to feel better about myself, and because I was constantly hyping myself up it became second nature to compliment others.

The downside after 8 years of this, is that I have lost any kind of humility and If I don’t look in the mirror at least once a day I melt into ash.

From a trans perspective, it REALLY helps with my dysphoria. I think it’s very easy to get caught up in what you should look like. You start to get this image in your head of what’s attractive or how someone should look and it’s the dissonance of looking in the mirror and seeing something different that fucks with you.

I didn’t realize how much that was until I lived with my Ex who didn’t keep any mirrors in the house cause they hated what their appearance looked like. When I finally got out of there, I was horrified seeing myself in the mirror at first and couldn’t figure out why, until I realized I had forgotten what I looked like. The memories had gotten so warped seeing myself as someone else or what I thought I looked like that my body came as a shock.

So. Now. 8 years later, I am a very vain pretty bird who loves looking at myself. It’s not like everything is ‘fixed’. I’m still gonna have little insecurities and still do. (My torso is long, I’m crazy boney, my hair is pretty thin so if it parts weird it looks like a little bald spot, etc etc whatever) but I work to love the little insecurities I have. And sometimes the way I get over them is a little weird.

I’m crazy boney and uncomfortable to cuddle -> I look like one of the baldur’s gate tieflings and actually that fucks. Those guys are hot.

My torso is long and I feel like a stretched out jpeg -> I have a super masculine torso and hips actually

My hair is thin -> …Honestly still working on that one. But my go to is that fuck it. Worst case scenario I’ve shaved my head down before and I have a good headshape for being bald so ya know. I’ll still be hot even if I shave it.

You kinda just have to fight your thoughts until they come over to your side. Or as my mom once joked, conning with walkfidence.

(Also thanks for the juice)

#like nyah? #brotherly advice

[latelyanobsession]

Bang Bang

summary you hadn’t known billy hargrove long, but you won’t let the impact he made on you go unnoticed.

warnings angst, pining, grief, and pure unadulterated tears

word count 1,228

note I was writing for my series when Nancy Sinatra’s Bang Bang - My Baby Shot Me Down came up on my Spotify and I just said to myself, ‘wow fuck me up fam.’ And so I thought I shouldn’t keep the tears to myself anymore. tried to once again write this from a gn!reader perspective.

As always any feedback is much appreciated. Thanks for reading!

You’d barely even known Billy Hargrove for a year.

Not even a year.

It might be better to say you hardly knew him.

And yet a part of you felt like you’d known him forever.

When you heard the helicopters roaring by overhead as you stood in your yard that muggy July morning...

You somehow knew in the pit of your stomach that something had gone terribly wrong.

Going inside to ask your parents about it, your mother already had on the television.

The local news affiliate, WCPK was broadcasting from the Starcourt Mall. 

“There’s been an accident...” your father said from his armchair, clicking up the volume.

Hope Freeman was reporting in front of the south entrance near the food court.

Smoke was billowing in large plumes from the roof behind her.

But that wasn’t what upset you.

Behind the police tape, to the right of the camera frame, was a busted up muscle car next to a totaled convertible.

There was only one guy in town that you knew who drove a car like that.

Who drove a 1979 Chevy Camaro Z28.

You grabbed your keys.

It couldn’t be true.

There was already a crowd at the mall. You couldn’t even begin to count how many news vans there were. 

This was probably the biggest story to ever hit Hawkins to date. But that wasn’t what you cared about.

Your feet carried you to the exact spot. As far as the police tape would let you go.

It was true. 

There. Right in front of you.

The passenger’s side of the camaro was wrecked. The sideview mirror was hanging by a thread. The hood was bent up, pulled away from the frame.

The windshield was smashed beyond recognition and ... were there bullet holes?

Water was dripping from the chassis but the remains were still smoldering. The contracting metal still making small clinks and pops as it cooled.

The car looked so horrific. It terrified you thinking of the violence that had occurred overnight. 

While you had been none the wiser. Sleeping comfortably.

You felt sick. Guilty. How had you not known?

On the far east side there were still a few ambulances packing up.

You needed to know. 

The EMTs were not busy. There was no flurry of activity.

Weren’t they supposed to be helping people?

A gurney was rolling out one of the bay doors. There was a sheet covering their form.

You really, truly didn’t want to think about this. The possibility of who was under there.

Hitting the curb, an arm rolled out. 

You choked out a loud sob, your eyes seeing the ring on the middle finger.

Reality was cruel. 

You had just seen him a couple days ago.

You had a massive argument that night. He said the most the most terrible things to you. 

Things that you never would’ve believed he would say. It didn’t really seem like he himself believed he was saying them.

He wanted you gone. Out of his life. At any cost he said.

You didn’t believe him. It was breaking you. 

Shattering you to pieces to hear each biting word come from the lips of someone you trusted so dearly.

Someone you genuinely loved but had no heart to tell.

He pushed you out. 

Slamming the door right in your face, and taking everything you thought you had figured out in life with him.

The funeral was miserable.

Not only for yourself but because you knew it was exactly the kind of thing he would have hated.

All the dressed up pomp and circumstance just to be planted in the ground and forgotten by people who pretend and never really knew who the hell you were in the first place.

The fake smiles. The fake tears. The false and empty “I’m sorry for your loss...”

He would have absolutely hated it.

The only person who really seemed to enjoy themselves at his funeral was his father.

The man couldn’t seem to get enough of people’s handshakes and condolences.

He fed on their pity and attention in a way that nauseated you.

You spent most of the service sitting next to his sister Max.

Neither of you said much to one another, but somehow it seemed like you both understood how awful and how stupid this all felt.

You both took solace in each other’s company if only for that reason alone.

It wasn’t even two weeks after the funeral when you heard his father was going to scrap the camaro.

You offered him cash on the spot. You didn’t even care if it was over half your savings that you had been scraping together since you were twelve.

You could not let one more piece of him be destroyed. You just couldn’t.

You lost count of how many times you’d cried since that July morning.

But the time that you cried the hardest was when the camaro was hauled into your driveway.

You had to pry the door open, the hinges creaking in distress.

Glass was everywhere. The dashboard was melted and singed with smoke.

Sitting in the tape deck, half inserted was a Def Leppard cassette, warped from the heat of the fire.

Below in the center console, were his most prized possessions.

His aviators, a zippo lighter, half a remaining pack of Marlboros and two other cassettes. Scorpions and Metallica.

You sat in that car for hours. Crying.

When you couldn’t cry any longer you would just sit there quietly and think.

Think of all the times you had been in this car.

All the times he’d yelled at you for turning down the music. Or rolling the window down. Or touching anything.

Arguing about his car. Arguing in general.

Laughing. God you missed his laugh.

His smile. The way he’d bashfully look away when a genuine grin would grace his lips.

God it all hurt so much.

Why couldn’t it have been you instead?

You wouldn’t have cared. You’d have willingly taken a bullet, run through flames. Gone to hell and back.

If it just could have been you instead.

The thing you hated most about all of this was how little his death affected others.

It felt like your entire world had stopped spinning.

And people. Classmates. Your parents. 

Had the nerve. The audacity. To continue on like nothing had ever happened.

You felt like screaming. You wanted them to hurt as much as you did.

They didn’t understand. They didn’t see.

And so you sat in that car. And you would scream. And you would cry.

Eventually you worked up the strength to start cleaning it up.

You cleaned out the glass and the debris.

You replaced the windshield.

You took it to the shop got replacement parts and had the body worked on.

And each time you fixed up another little part of it.

You would talk to him.

You would talk to Billy.

You’d sit in the car and chat just like you had.

You replaced the tape deck and got new cassettes. 

When the car was driveable you started taking it out. Not on long outings.

You knew he’d kill you if you did that. 

Just enough to keep it working.

And you would drive that car to all the places he liked and the places he’d been.

No one was going to forget Billy Hargrove.

#stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things imagine #stranger things headcanon #stranger things oneshot #stranger things x reader #stranger things x gn reader #stranger things x you #stranger things x y/n #stranger things x gn!reader #billy hargrove #billy stranger things #billy hargove imagine #billy hargrove headcanon #billy hargrove oneshot #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove x you #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove x gn!reader

[come-along-pond]

notes: My second box for the @occreatorexchange prompt bingo. This is my first full published smut so uh, please be kind. We can thank @curious-kittens-ocs, @astarionbae and @endless-oc-creations for dealing with my complaining and begging for peer review.

warnings: NSFW. Swearing, kissing, fingering, p in v, no protection, kitchen sex, titty sucking, edging, scratching and leaving marks. Bruce says 'good girl' because I'm a slut. IF YOU HATE THE WORD TITS DON’T READ.

Isabella Wayne (OC) x Bruce Wayne: MaleDom

AO3 VERSION

“Harls I love you, I do, but I can not listen to the same story for the fifth time,” Isabella Wayne is standing outside her apartment, keys in one hand, her mobile in the other, pressed to her ear. Harley had been talking her ear off nonstop ever since she’d left the Grocery Store - ‘Gotham’s a scary place Izzie, you gotta stay safe’, she didn’t realise the irony in that.

Bella pushes open her door, not expecting to see the lights already on, she has a moment of panic before she sees a familiar silhouette leaning on her kitchen counter. 

She doesn’t acknowledge him, merely continuing to listen to the woman on the other side of the phone, and placing her shopping bag on the kitchen island, she starts to unpack and places two wine bottles down, the figure picks one up and inspects it, almost disgusted by the cheap alcohol.

“As entertaining as you are darling, I’m going to go drown myself in the bath with a bottle of wine,”

“You’re so rich,” she can feel Harley’s eye roll. 

“Bye,” Isabella sings her farewells and hangs up, placing her phone on the counter, “I thought you of all people would be against breaking and entering,”

“I didn’t break anything, just entered,” Isabella’s husband shrugs “Who was that,” he gestures to her phone

“Oh don’t be jealous Brucie, she’s just a friend,” Bella winks and Bruce sighs

“Isabella-“

“You keep enough tabs on me Bruce, you could find out very easily,” she grumbles, opening the fridge to put away her small carton of milk.

“I thought maybe I’d give you a chance to be honest for once,” that stung, he knew it did and Bella turns away from him.

“Am I not allowed friends? Am I supposed to be imprisoned in my apartment, only seeing you and business associates, you don’t even look at me properly anymore,”

“I do,” he says firmly, but there’s something underlying like it’s something to be ashamed of “I’m sorry…” This happened a lot, he’d come over, and they’d bite at each other until someone cracked Bella sighs and joins him by the counter, crossing her arms and mirroring his position.

A moment passes, then another.

“It was Harley,”

“I know,” of course he did

“Why are you here Bruce?” Isabella asks, she looks up at the taller man, his jaw was as sharp as ever, but his stubble had grown past his old limit. 

It takes him a minute to respond, battling with his thoughts, he tries to remember Isabella before Belle Reve, her kind eyes and calm demeanour, they were honest with each other then, or so he thought.

“I missed you,” he admits, placing his palms behind him.

“Me too,” she says quietly, looking right up at him, she places her hand on top of his and finally he turns to look at her, to properly look at her.

He isn’t sure how to feel about what he finds: she was still her with long blonde hair and determined brown eyes. She was still her.

He thinks maybe his life would be easier if she wasn’t. 

“I still love you,”

“I know, me too,” with her response, Bruce cups his wife’s cheeks and pulls her in for a kiss. She responds instantly, moaning when he spins her around and pushes her against the kitchen island, his hands slip down her back and into her jeans, grabbing at the flesh of her ass while she grabs his arms for support.

“Bedroom?” she asks breathlessly, god he’d barely touched her and she needed him, in her defence, it’d been over a year since they’d been together.

Bruce pulls back, and looks her in the eyes “Are you sure?” she nods “Words sweetheart,”

“Fuck. Yes, yes I want this,” she breaths out and Bruce smirks, hoisting her up onto the counter, she grins into his neck, peppering kisses down it, she kicks off her heels and nudges his leg “Shoes, Bruce,” he reluctantly sighs, but pauses to slip out of them “You’re not running my flooring,” she says casually while slipping off her shirt.

“You’re so dramatic,” he kisses her again, nibbling at her lip while his large hands grope at her tits through her bra, As Isabella moans, her own hands run down to unbutton her jeans, but he stops her, grabbing her hands tightly “My job,” Bella grins and removes her hands, placing them on the counter behind her

“Want me to lay back as well?” she teases, but Bruce merely pushes her down, causing her to laugh he unzips her trousers and gently instructs her to lift herself up so he can shimmy them down, she complies and hears the gentle thud of the denim on the ground.

She was exposed now, her dark blue underwear on show for him to see, and his hands run down her thighs “Is this the set I bought you?” When Isabella goes to remind him that there was a point in her life where she exclusively wore underwear from him, she feels him swipe between her folds, collecting what had leaked through already, she thanks god he doesn't comment on how quickly he got her worked up. It takes him a while to move up her legs, massaging her ankles, and bringing his lips to her knees, slowly kissing up her thigh.

“Bruce..” she moans out

“Mhm?” he continues his actions, leaving a light hickey on her thigh

“Touch something…please,” she’s breathless, feeling her slick pool in her underwear

“I’ve got to warm you up darling,” he squeezes her thighs, one hand reaches up to her bra and slips under it, squeezing her right boob, causing her to sigh in relief, the other hand easily slips off her underwear, leaving her almost fully exposed. He gently cups her whilst his right thumb flicks at her breast, Bella gasps sharply, but it quickly turns into a moan when he starts to slowly circle her clit.

“Bruce please,” she groans, she felt like she was on fire, her slick was starting to get uncomfortable, and she just needed something, some friction. Thankfully, Bruce listens to her, and his middle finger slips inside her, slowly moving in and out.

“God you’re still so tight,” he picks up the pace, and Isabella arches her back

“More,” she moans out

“Have you forgotten who’s in charge here?” he says sharply, pulling his finger out, leaving her empty again, Bella wants to kick him, but she sits up, his hands both on her thighs.

“Please,” she adds, he smirks, and soon she’s back lying on the table, two fingers now inside her, slowly speeding up.

“Good girl,” he praises, and she lets out a damn near pornographic moan “Gonna take me so well later,” she starts to babble, mixing his name in with’ pleases’ while his thumb continues to circle her sensitive nub.

“Fuck..Fuck, fuck!” She’s close, she moans loudly, arching her back, her core tightens and she wants to both squirm away from Bruce and force him to go faster, leaving her a screaming mess. She feels it near and then…

Nothing.

He’d pulled his fingers out and left her just on the edge of her release. 

“Oh you ass,” she sighs, breathing heavily, Bruce grabs her calves roughly, pulling her down the island before leaning over her so they’re face to face.

“What was that?” he asks, hiding a smirk

“Asshole,” she says boldly and he lets out a breathy laugh, his hand finding her core again, fingers filling her suddenly. 

“Fuck!” he doesn’t give her time to warm up this time, moving in and out with two fingers and with such a speed Bella can hardly compute it, all she can do is swear loudly. She doesn’t know what to do with her hands, putting them above her head whilst her legs pull Bruce closer as she nears her end again “I’m close…don’t, don’t you dare-” she’s so nearly there, her heels digging into Bruce’s back, she can see his hard-on but knows he has the self-control not to take her right there, god she hated that right now.

Again, his hands leave her just as she nearly falls over the edge, tears are forming now, but god she loved it, he knew she did. 

Isabella doesn’t say anything, only putting her hand down, gesturing for Bruce to hold it, he does and she squeezes it tightly “You okay?” he asks, and she just lets out a breathy giggle.

“If you let me cum I’ll be much better,” 

He tuts softly “C’mon, sit up,” she does as she’s told and he scoops her up in his arms, she screeches and grabs on behind his neck, giggling as he carries her to the bedroom. 

The apartment had been nearly abandoned since Isabella had moved in with Bruce all those years ago, it was used as an office for her, somewhere to go when the Cabin was too far away, and she needed a break from work. Now, it’s become her permanent residence again, she’d been picked up from Bella Reve in a simple Range Rover and driven here, not to her home with Bruce, to a dusty apartment with no one to speak to. 

Slowly, Bella had started to redecorate, and the bedroom hadn’t been touched yet, with cream walls and a collection of musky-smelling candles on her dresser. 

Bruce lays his wife down on her bed, hovering over her to press soft kisses to her lips, he was gentler now, and Bella couldn’t help but wonder if the guilt of leaving her had kicked in, she really wasn’t good at not being sad these days, and that still applied during sex apparently.

She runs her fingers through his hair and he starts to kiss down her jaw, he bites at her neck and she moans, scratching at his scalp. That got his attention and he pulled back, lifting his tight black t-shirt over his head, revealing his abs.

Isabella shamelessly checks him out, biting her lip and grinning, she sits up and grabs the back of his head, connecting their lips suddenly and pulling him back down with her, her hands roaming over his chest, this makes him moan and she smiles into the kiss, her hands reaching his belt and undoing it. He lets her do it, his own hands moving to her back, unhooking her bra, his lips unlock with hers and starts to suck at her left boob, whilst his right hand fondles the other one, his left-hand sneaks down to her opening, collecting the slick once again. He inserts his fingers for the fourth time, this time moving slowly to match his pace on her tits.

It doesn’t take long to get Bella to the edge again, he’d worked her up so much - denying her an orgasm twice, and looking far too hot while doing it. She tries not to show that she’s about to cum this time, but her moans become more high pitched and her grip on his hair tightens. Bruce slithers up her next, whispering in her ear

“Come on baby, let go,” that does it, her walls clench around his fingers and she pulls at his hair.

“Bruce..oh fuck!” she screams and her juices flood the bed, god it felt so good, he continues through it letting her ride her high.

Slowly, he removes himself from her and she complains at the lack of closeness, he kisses her softly before standing up and slipping off his slacks, then his boxers, Isabella watches his dick spring up, pre cum smeared over the tip, and she moans at the sight of it. It was as mouth-watering as she remembered, with a thick girth and decent length, her core clenches just at the sight of it. Bruce gets back on the bed, he kisses her again, and she chases his lips.

“You ready?” he checks and she nods “Wo-”

“Yes,” she doesn’t need him to finish the sentence “Fuck, please,” he smirks and pumps himself slowly, groaning at the feeling of his own hand, oh how he often imagined her manicured fingers around him instead of his own, how he remembered the tightening of her cunt around him. 

Bruce slowly lowers himself down and inserts himself into Bella, she gasps ever so slightly, letting out a shaky hum and Bruce joins her.

“Taking me so well, fuck,” he bottoms out after the slow process, Bella lets him stay there for a moment as both of them relish in the tight stretch of her “Missed you,” he whispers into her ear and she shivers “so much, god,” his hips buck involuntarily and she gasps.

“You can move,” she greenlights and he pulls back before sharply re-entering, both gasp and slowly he picks up his pace, the bed shakes as he grunts

“Fuck…So perfect,” 

Isabella grabs onto his biceps, her nails digging into the skin, the pain edges him on and Bruce keeps up the rough pace, his own grunts of pleasure mixing with Bella’s moans “Faster. Oh fuck, shit,” she feels the rope tighten in her stomach again, and she screams out “I’m close!”

“Just a little bit longer, come on, you can take it,” Bruce watches her tits jiggle with each of his thrusts “Come on,”

“I can’t-” she scratches down his arms “Gotta cum,” the pressure is too much, he’s so big, she’s so full “Please Bruce, let me - please, oh shit,”

“Let go, darling, come on,” with that, the dam breaks, and again, Bella moans loudly, arching her back, her hips jerk with the sensation and Bruce continues his thrusting, he tucks her hair behind her ear, kissing her as his own pleasure builds, her walls trying to milk him dry “Can I- shit,” he groans and Bella recognises the signs, her fingernails scratch at his scalp

“You can cum inside,” she explains and that's what makes him let go, his cum coating her walls. He rides out his own release and Bella continues to moan. Finally, he collapses on her, the heavyweight comforting.

Both lay there breathless for a few minutes, overwhelmed by the mix of emotions they’d both felt. Bella feels her eyes slip shut, and Bruce slowly stands up, his cock exiting her, she groans at the emptiness, and crosses her legs.

Bruce stands up and starts to walk away from the bed, Isabella looks up, just seeing his backside as he puts on his boxers.

“Don’t leave,” she says panicked, tears in her eyes, he looks almost offended but remembers the post bliss, vulnerable state she’s in and leans down to kiss her temple.

“I’m just getting a cloth sweetheart,” he reassures, and when he returns from the en-suite, he cleans her up, ending the night with her in his arms.

#bruce wayne smut #batfleck smut #bruce wayne x oc #bruce wayne fanfiction #batman smut #batman x oc #batman fanfiction #dceu fanfiction #oc: isabella wayne #ocx bingo #ocappreciation #ocapp #ochub #allaboutocs #my writing

[bucky-munson]

What’s Hidden in the Shadows | 7

Summary: Bullies are everywhere. They manifest as a group of jocks at school who think you're fat and want to make sure you know. Sometimes they even manifest as your own father. But can they manifest as the love of your life? No probably not.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

Words: 1.2k

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Plus Sized!GN!Reader ; Steve Harrington X Plus Sized!GN!Reader

Warnings: MENTIONS OF DISORDERED EATING IN THIS ONE!! Bullying, abuse, swearing, mean ass Billy obv

a.n: Billy’s learning the consequences of his actions finally o3o

Taglist: @harringtonfan4 @jubilee40 @cevans-winchester​ @urmomgov

The smell of spices filled the air as you stirred away at the pan you had on the stove. It wouldn't be an elegant meal, but from the way Billy had his eyes on it intently you figured he didn't really care.

"What are you even using? I swear Susan's food never smells this good.." He mumbles, chin resting on your shoulder as he stares into the pan. It's oddly domestic with his hands draped on your sides and the gentle warmth from his chest against your back. He'd tried to kiss you even more in the bathroom but when his stomach let out an embarrassing growl, you forced him to let you cook him a proper meal.

"Secret ingredients.. Be nice to me and I might share them," you chuckle softly, moving out of his grasp to grab the meat you had chunked up before dropping it in with the veggies. They sizzle instantly and you're back to stirring, Billy's hands returning to their place almost immediately. Nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck he holds you tighter, enjoying the softness you provide. 

The scene is quiet other than the sounds of the plastic spoon against the pan, but inside you couldn't stop the constant monologue. It felt almost wrong to be here, in this moment, Billy Hargrove clinging to you like a doting husband. After the months of torment, all it took was a few soft words and you were wrapped around his finger like so many others? He hadn't even apologized for how he acted or the constant negative comments about your body. The body he was now so desperately holding. Words bubbled on the tip of your tongue. 

So was it all a lie? You never hated my body? You just got what? A sick kick out of making me hate myself more? You know, I still hear every comment you or those other assholes made in my head when I look at myself in the mirror. Why don't you ask me how many meals I skipp–

"Fuck I'm hungry, is it almost done?" He whines as he steps away, opening the door to the fridge and helping himself to one of your father's many beers. It snaps you out of the fight you were having internally and brings you back. A part of you wished you would just bring it up, get it over with like a bandaid, but a smaller part craved this peace; A momentary cease-fire in an ongoing war yes, but peace nonetheless. 

You can only watch as Billy takes his first bite apprehensively, but his face breaks out into a smile as he eats more comfortably. He motions for you to join him and you oblige, both of you chewing silently in the now too quiet trailer. The thoughts overpower you though and before you know it you're asking a question you're not even sure you want the answer to.

"Billy.. What was that.. in the bathroom I mean.." He looks up at you dumbfounded for a moment before responding.

"Uhm.. A kiss?"

"You know that's not what I mean.. First we're like mortal enemies and then secret friends and now what? Secret dating?" 

"Is that what you want?" His question stops you in your tracks and honestly, you hadn't thought of that. If he did want to continue this, what would you say? And what about Steve? 

"I.. Don't want to be kept a secret, I deserve more than that," you finally reply, feigning confidence but still mindlessly pushing around your food. 

"It'll just be until we graduate, and then we can leave this shithole town.. Maybe move to California? You'd love it there, babe, I'm sure, way more freedom and people aren't such hicks.." You sigh as he skips right over your feelings, almost exactly like you knew he would. 

"And what? Before then we just hide out at the lake on days when no one is there? I hide enough, Billy, at school, the pool, the mall.. I don't want to hide anymore," 

"I'm protecting you, don't you see that? I'm protecting both of us from whatever those assholes would do, they'd be relentless," he groans, slamming his fork down. "You have no idea how it would be if we were public."

"Steve Harrington asked me out in the middle of a packed cafeteria but Billy Hargrove is scared of what a few jocks will think?" There they go, the words you wanted to cling to more than anything, the one thing you had hoped to keep inside. You never wanted to bring up Steve in this discussion, but he was an inevitability so long as Billy wanted you for his own. 

"He what?" 

Any confidence you had fizzled with the icy cold stare in Billy's eyes. You could only stumble over your words as he stood in disbelief.

"So that's what this is.. King Steve asked you out? Is that where you were when I got here? I didn't expect you to be out but with Harrington no less?" The rage seemed to boil inside of him, his eyes darting around as he tried to put the pieces together, forcing them to fit a narrative he constructed. "You know, I didn't take you for a hit it and quit it type but if you agreed to go out with him–"

"I didn't do anything with him, Billy! Not that it's ANY of your business. I mean what did you say to me a few weeks ago? Oh wait I remember, "I wouldn't touch that with a twenty foot pole, probably would eat me"? And yet here you are, all over me like a fucking koala? What's the truth huh? At least Steve didn't tear me down for months just to show up at my doorstep. He isn't scared to tell me he cares about me in front of other people, you just hide behind your bullshit attitude and lackies cause you're scared to fall off your pedestal!" Tears are falling freely now, the anger too much to hold in. You'd be lying if you said his words didn't haunt you in every aspect of life. Ignoring them was easy when he hated you, you could pretend he didn't exist outside of school, but now with his presence an invasive species, they had nowhere to go.

"So what do you want me to do? Do you want me to parade you around town? Why do you want everyone to know anyway? So they can treat me like a prize you won? So you can be 'the one who tied down Billy Hargrove'?" Billy throws his hands in the air before running them through his hair, more arguing the last thing he wanted.

"I don't care about any of that, I just want to know that it matters to you how I feel. I won't let you use me like everyone else you've been with, a piece of ass or arm candy. I need to know, for certain, does everyone have to like you or am I enough?" A hush falls over both of you, your eyes on him and his on the floor. It was asking a lot of him, you knew that, telling him to throw out the reputation he spent the better part of a year building up, but it was impossible for him to ask you to hide in the shadows. 

#billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove #stranger things #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #plus sized reader