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cloudzoro · 3 months

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Pumpkin | Roronoa Zoro ♡

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

genre: smut with a little bit of plot (minors dni)

pairings: roronoa zoro x fem reader

wc: 8.4k words

cw: mutual pining, idiots to lovers, reader gets hit on in a bar multiple times, zoros feelings are all over the place bc he's a mess, monster cock!zoro, unprotected sex, soft zoro </3, marking, bad flirting

masterlist here

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You have feelings for Zoro and you know it, Zoro has feelings for you and doesn't know it. Everyone is collectively sick of your shit. It isn't until you get hit on in a bar and Zoro has to step in that he realises how deep his feelings for you run.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

If you squeeze that glass any harder, it's gonna shatter,” says Nami, nodding at the glass of beer Zoro holds in his hand. Zoro waves her off, sparing her a glance just to glare at her before focusing on the cause of his irritation. You're standing at the bar of the dingy lounge, talking to Sanji and the random guy who's been showing you around the new island the strawhats had docked up at. The place isn't too busy, so he can see you without looking past a crowd. Unfortunately, he can also see the new guy you've met. The guy is interested in you, leaning in to talk to you, which gives Zoro a nasty feeling in his chest. He chalks it up to being protective; he doesn't like how the man looks at you. For once, Zoro is actually grateful for Sanji's presence. The tall cook at your side, looking as enraged as Zoro feels, is intimidating to the guy who backs up a little.

“Your girl’s talking to other men. If I were you, I'd kill the guy,” says Usopp, and Zoro rolls his eyes. He is not even bothering to answer. You're not his girl. You're just friends. Zoro isn't even sure he's capable of falling in love. You step back from the guy, clearly uncomfortable, and Zoro starts to see red. It isn't until Chopper and Usopp reach out to grab him that he realises he's even stood up. Ready to jump into action. “Don't make a scene; I'm really not in the mood for a fight,” says Usopp, trying his best to push Zoro back into his seat.

When his eyes focus back on where you're standing at the bar, Zoro sees that Sanji has stepped in and told the man off. You're safe now. The man had run away with his tail between his legs, but the bitter taste in his mouth is still there. He watches intently as you walk back to the table where the strawhats are sitting, with Sanji in tow and drinks in hand. You set another glass in front of him, and just as you walk away to sit on the other side of the table, he pats the seat next to him. You raise an eyebrow at his request, his un-Zoro-like behaviour startling you.

“Just don't wanna sit next to the dumb cook”, he grumbles, looking down at the table instead of at you. You nod and slide into the chair next to him. Now that he can feel your presence next to him, he feels the weight lift from his shoulders.

“So y/n, what happened?” asks Nami, always a fan of gossip. You go to answer, but you're immediately stopped by Sanji, who butts in with his own account.

“That horrible ugly man was trying to steal our precious y/n away for his crew. As if she'd ever leave us.” he huffs out. Luffy laughs at how idiotic the idea of you leaving would be. Zoro doesn’t speak as he watches you sip your drink and roll your eyes at Sanji’s dramatics.

“That loser was just hitting on me,” you say, trying to play it down to get the attention off of you. Despite first appearing extroverted, you aren’t too keen on attention being on you. It's one of the reasons Zoro gels with you much better than some of his other crewmates. Once the conversation switches from the almost bar fight to whatever crazy made-up story Usopp tells, you lean into Zoro’s side to speak quietly in his ear. “I saw you stand up earlier; you looked like you were gonna kill him. Thank you, even if you were held back,” you say, laughing at how ridiculous he looked. Your thanks are sincere, even if you still tease him for it. Zoro has been a silent protector for you since you joined the crew. Everyone knows you’re in his top three Straw hats, alongside Luffy and Chopper. As much as he tries to convince himself that you’re tied with your captain, you’re number one and almost pulling a lead. It's clear to the rest of the crew that the only people in the world who can’t see how you feel are you and Zoro. Zoro offers you an amused smirk, close to a smile but not quite, and raises his glass. You do the same, clinking your glasses and continuing with your drink. You re-enter the conversation, talking animatedly with Nami and Usopp, but Zoro is more than happy to sit back and watch his family in a rare moment of peace. He only speaks whenever Sanji makes a comment that riles him up.

Luffy and Usopp are terrible influences on you. Your captain and sharpshooter like to have fun, which often includes dragging you into their shenanigans. They’re always making terrible drinking games and challenges, egged on by Brook and Franky. You, not one to back down from a challenge, always end up joining them. You’ve put more alcohol away in one night than you have in the last month, and when it's time to leave, Zoro and Robin take it upon themselves to support you as you can barely stand up by yourself. You sway as the fresh air hits you harder than expected. You almost let go of Robin completely as you lean into Zoro. You mumble something about not wanting to walk anymore, and Zoro sighs, signalling Robin to carry on ahead. He crouches down and tells you to hop on his back. You do so, settling yourself and pressing your face into his neck. He hears you mumble a thanks into his skin before passing out.

This isn't the first time one of your crewmates has had to carry you back to the sunny, and it definitely won't be the last. Zoro doesn't mind your weight on him; he brings you to your room, sets you down in your bed, and takes off your shoes and jewellery as carefully as he can before leaving and walking out to the deck.

“One of you ladies should probably go in there just to make sure she doesn’t vomit in her sleep and choke and die”, he says as he walks up to the edge of the ship to look out at the sea. Robin says she’ll stay with you and walks to the girls' bedroom.

“So when will you tell her you’re completely in love with her?” asks Nami, startling him.

“When will you leave me alone so I can enjoy a peaceful night.”

“You’re deflecting.”

“You’re annoying,” he says, unable to defend himself in any other way. Nami sighs and pats his shoulder.

“You need help, dude,” she says condescendingly. Nami has mastered the art of irritating the men aboard the ship; it’s a form of entertainment for her sometimes. “The sooner you tell her you like her, the sooner you can bone, and then maybe you won't be such an uptight freak anymore.” Zoro can tell her own comment tickles her, but before he can spit out a sarcastic response, he is cut off by the voice of his airhead captain.

“Are we talking about Zoro’s y/n kink?” he asks, loudly chewing on the leftovers from earlier’s dinner. Zoro doesn't even dignify that question with a response. He stomps off to the boy’s bedroom and climbs into his hammock. Clearly, he’d only get peace aboard this ship by being unconscious.

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The next day, You wake up with a throbbing in your head, and your stomach turns as you run to the ship bathroom. You empty your stomach of nastiness and head to the kitchen to get some water to drink. Sanji put some food away for you with a little note, and it warms your heart how your boys care for you. You nibble your way through your breakfast and set about looking for where everyone is.

The first person you find is Brook, sitting on a chair and drinking tea. You ask him where everyone is, and he informs you that most of the crew have gone sightseeing in the city at the island's centre. He tells you that Zoro and Usopp are the only people still in the area. Usopp is in his room, recovering from last night, and Zoro is just in front of the sunny, taking advantage of the space to get in a good workout. You decide to go and bother him.

“Hi, Zoro,” you say, approaching him. “Need a sparring partner?” you ask; seeing him shirtless is an excellent motivator. He looks at you in your sweats and tank top and laughs. He knows those are your comfy clothes and just woke up.

“That depends. Are you gonna vomit on me?”

“No”, you get defensive about your weak alcohol tolerance despite having proved your lightweight status regularly. “I don’t even have a real hangover, just a headache” you insist.

“That is a hangover, pumpkin,” he says. Pumpkin isn't a pet name; it's a nickname you were given when you first joined the crew, and almost everyone except Luffy and Robin uses it. Yet it still makes heat rise in your cheeks when Zoro uses it. It sounds different coming from him than it does coming from someone like Franky.

“I’ll be fine, I promise.” If you keep pestering him, he’ll give in eventually.

“Fine, but I'm not going easy on you”, he says, enjoying how defensive you get at any insinuation of weakness.

“I’d be insulted if you did.”

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The sparring session ends when Zoro pins you down on your back for the fifth time.

“You’re getting better at close combat. It took me a lot longer to knock you down this time,” he says. They’re simple words of encouragement, but they make your stomach feel funny. When you catch your breath, and the adrenaline is out of your system, you realise that he's still on top of you. There's something different in how you look at him now, and you hope he doesn't notice it. You're fully aware of how your feelings for Zoro have changed in recent weeks, but you figure he doesn't feel the same way, so you've kept it to yourself. Zoro isn't the relationship type.

He seems to realise by himself that he's still hovering over you, so he quickly moves himself off you and helps you up. He mutters an apology and walks with you in silence back to the ship. In the silence, all you can think about is the view of a sweaty, shirtless Zoro on top of you. You want the image seared permanently into your brain.

When you return to the sunny, you get washed and changed. While you're in the shower, you can't help the way your fingers wander between your legs, pleasuring yourself with the thought of Zoro clouding your mind. The combination of an orgasm and a shower has refreshed you, and you decide to go into the centre to find Nami and Robin. You pass Brook on the way out, who has now been joined by Usopp.

“Were you showering with your boyfriend?”

The question stops you in your tracks. Boyfriend?.

“I don't have a boyfriend, Brook. What do you mean?” Usopp matches your confused expression, looking between you and Brook

“Are you not dating our swordsman?”

“No, of course I'm not. Why would you think that?!” you ask, exasperated by his audacity. Then it clicks in your head. You remember what you did in the shower that could've tipped him off.

“I heard you saying his name.” As the words leave Brook's mouth, Usopp gasps, finally realising where the confusion has come from. You must not have been quiet enough when touching yourself to the thought of him. Usopp looks completely embarrassed, and you hope he'll keep this secret. He's too ashamed of knowing something intimate about you.

“Nope. You were just imagining things. Anyway, I have to go and find Nami and Robin, so I'll be going now. Bye, guys, see you later,” you yell as you rush off the ship to escape the embarrassing situation as quickly as possible.

You catch up with Nami and Robin pretty fast. They split from the boys a while ago and are about to wander through a local market. They're happy to have you along as company, and Robin makes sure to ask about your hangover. You tell them that you were training with Zoro before coming out, and the mention of the green-haired swordsman makes Nami smirk. You already know how the conversation will go, but it's unavoidable.

“Did you finally tell Zoro how you feel about him?” she asks. You turn to Robin, and she just smiles and shrugs, which is code for ‘I want to know the gossip, but I don't want to seem like I'm not on your side’.

“No, because I've told you a million times that Zoro doesn't think of me that way. We had a training session today, and all he did was make fun of me for being a lightweight.”

“Are you stupid? He carried you home last night,” says Nami.

“Everyone's carried my drunk ass home at least once.”

“He's obsessed with you.” She laughs. “In every way.”

“I think Nami's right”, says Robin, and you feel like you're about to be driven crazy.

“I already told you he doesn't feel the same way. He's had so many opportunities to ask me out, and he's never even hinted at it. He's nice to me because we're close friends. That's it,” you say, frustrated at the topic. “it hurts, though; I really do like him”, you say sombrely.

They're good friends to you and respect your boundaries as much as they love to gossip. They can see you don't want to discuss Zoro anymore, so they change the subject to buying cute clothes. You look around the market for handmade garments by real natives of the area. Learning about other cultures through food and fashion is your favourite part of travelling the world.

When you arrive back on the Sunny, You go straight to the girls' quarters, avoiding Brook and Usopp, and put your bags of clothing away. You lay on your bed and let yourself completely relax into it, allowing the wear and tear of the day to seep out of your body.

Zoro, however, is less relaxed than you. Luffy has been asking him what he talked about with Nami all day. He feels seconds away from punching the over-excited man. He's repeatedly said he's not interested in a relationship and certainly not you. He's insisted time and time again that you two are just friends.

“oooh, how about you go into town with her and spend some alone time?” Before Zoro can interject and ask why, Usopp hurriedly continues. “it could be a good way to have a proper talk and find out how she feels about you.”

Zoro, angered by his friend's persistence, finally responds.

“If it gets you two idiots to shut the fuck up, I'll do it. But it's not because I like her or anything.” He says, getting up and dragging himself inside. He passes the girls’ quarters on his way down, decides to pull up his big boy pants and knocks on the door. When you call to open the door, he pushes it open and sees you relaxing. He insists he doesn't have feelings for you; you’re just close friends, but seeing you dressed down and chilled causes a switch in his brain. He wishes Nami had never said anything the night before, or he wouldn't be second-guessing his feelings towards you. “You wanna come into town tomorrow?” He asks, as straightforward as he always is. You nod and smile at him. He hums in acknowledgement and shuts the door as he walks down to his bed. You know Zoro’s personality, so his response - or lack thereof - doesn’t phase you at all. You let sleep take you as Zoro begins to cloud all your thoughts.

“They’re so into each other it's gross,” says Nami, crossing her arms. “I don't understand why they don’t just fuck and get it other with”

“At least y/n is aware of feelings. Zoro doesn't even know he's in love with her,” adds Robin.

“She’s too good for him; I don’t even know why you’re trying to play cupid with them” growls Sanji.

“They’re so obvious about it that Brook thought they were dating,” says Usopp.

“Yes, she said I was hearing things, but I'm sure I heard her moaning his name”, says Brook before Usopp can even attempt to stop him. Silence falls among the group, and Nami and Robin share a knowing glance. They leave the boys to continue gossiping and go to the girls’ quarter. You don’t open your eyes when the door opens, having heard Nami and Robin’s voices approaching. However, when you feel your mattress dip, you open your eyes to see both women sitting on your bed, smiling at you. While Robin is usually the more mature of the women aboard the ship, she still needs a good laugh now and then, and you can tell that whatever they’re about to say will annoy you. Nami’s Cheshire cat-esque grin proves they’re about to either embarrass or pull you into a scheme.

“so”, Robin starts, clearing her throat.

“We just want to warn you that next time you have a wild sex dream about Zoro, you should moan his name a little quieter,” says Nami, giggling at the look of exasperation on your face. It takes you all of two seconds before you realise that Brook and Usopp snitched on you, and you jump out of bed to confront them.

Brook hears you scream his name and knows you’re about to beat his ass and has the sense to run. Usopp, however, drops to his knees and apologises, hoping to appease you. The scene is entertaining to the rest of the crew, who all chime in about whether or not you should have mercy on Usopp.

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

When morning comes around, you wake up and stretch. You spend a little extra time getting ready in the morning. When you leave the ship, Zoro is already waiting for you, leaning against a tree. He lets you take the lead as you walk into the town centre. The market stalls are busy, and you grab onto his shirt so you don't lose him. Zoro usually wouldn’t even bat an eye at the action. You’ve always had a mutual agreement to protect each other, but with the recent stirring feelings he's been forced to acknowledge, he’s hyper-aware of any physical contact between you. He’s taken some money from the ship to buy you food. At first, you don’t talk much, and he just watches you walk from stall to stall. You approach a stall selling jewellery, and Zoro stops behind you. The vendor looks over your shoulder at the man and pushes some chains towards you.

“What about something for your boyfriend?” she asks, and, to Zoro’s surprise, you don't correct the lady. You just nod and pick up a chain, turning to Zoro and signalling him to put it on. You don’t do it with ulterior motives; you just like buying your crewmates gifts. Maybe you didn’t correct the vendor when she called him your boyfriend to feed your secret crush, but he didn't correct her either, so no harm is done. When Zoro puts on the chain, he raises his eyebrow and asks what you think, and then he keeps it on as you pay the vendor. He still doesn't believe you have feelings for him or vice versa, so he thinks of the gift as a friendly gesture. You, however, keep getting distracted by thoughts of the chain you bought for him dangling over your face as he fucks you. He says something to you, and you have to ask him to repeat himself so you can focus on what he’s saying this time.

“We should go to that bar over there”, he suggests, pointing across the market to the bar you had been to a few nights before. You agree and follow him. You both decide to sit at the bar and get a drink each. Usually, small talk flows between you and Zoro naturally, but things seem awkward. You don’t know what's wrong with Zoro, but you’ve never seen him flounder like this. He excuses himself to the bathroom, and after he leaves, another man slides onto the seat next to you. You’re not interested, so you try to ignore his presence, and then he attempts to talk to you.

“You’re not from around here, are you? You stick out like a sore thumb,” he says, and before you can respond, he just keeps going. “I don’t mean that in a bad way, of course. You’re beautiful. What’d you say, I'll show you around?” You’d already been shown around when you first arrived on the island.

“I'm here with my boyfriend; he just went to the bathroom,” you say, hoping the guy will take the hint and leave. He doesn't and just continues to talk about himself and pitch himself as a potential partner to you. When Zoro exits the bathroom and sees the man speaking to you, he feels bile rise in his throat. You make eye contact as he approaches the bar, and your expression immediately shifts into a smile.

“Hi, babe.” The words shock him, and it takes him a second to process, but when he puts two and two together, he immediately helps you out by taking a step closer to you, so now he's stood directly behind you as you sit on the stool facing the strange man who’s approached you. He puffs out his chest and rolls his shoulders back to show off a little.

“Who’s this guy? Is he bothering you?” he asks. The role of a protective boyfriend comes naturally to him. You look up at him and nod, placing your drink on its coaster and backing up against him. His hand settles on your hip, and he internally panics about possibly going too far.

“I think we should go,” you say, grabbing his hand and turning to leave the bar. He feels that letting that loser stay in the bar and potentially harass other women while you have to leave the bar early isn't much of a punishment, so he grabs the guy by his shirt. You weren't expecting a bar fight immediately, but this is Zoro, so you take a step back and get ready to back him up if he needs it.

“You should go too; if I catch you anywhere near her, I will kill you. If I come here again and you're here, I will kill you,” he says, his other hand secured around one of his swords, and then he lets the man go. He hurries past you and out the door. When Zoro looks back at you, you’re smiling at him, and it shocks his system that you aren't even a little bit scared of him. He’s incapable of looking anywhere but you, but he knows the other patrons in the bar are watching him warily in fear. Not you, though. Your eyes are filled with something he’d never imagined to be directed at him: awe and respect. In that moment, he finally makes peace with the fact that maybe he likes you as more than just a crewmate.

“Thank you,” you say as you leave the bar. It seems like you’re always thanking him for something.

“Don’t mention it”, he says, brushing it off and focusing back on the market stalls. You pick up a few more gifts on the way home. Zoro accepts his feelings for you quickly, but now he has to figure out many other issues. Do you like him back? Is it possible for someone like him to pursue a relationship? Is he even worthy of your love? You linger on his mind when he returns to the men's quarters that night.

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You had spent the afternoon with the rest of the crew planning your next destination. When night finally fell, you had decided to stay out a little longer, chatting to the remaining crewmates who hadn’t gone to bed yet. When you get tired, you get up to go to bed, and Jinbe and Sanji thank you for their gifts and bid you goodnight. When you return to your room, Nami and Robin are waiting for you. You know they’re about to grill you for details about your day with Zoro.

“So, how did it go with Zoro?” asks Nami as you sit on the edge of your bed.

“It was fun. A guy hit on me in a bar, and he pretended to be my boyfriend and then threatened to kill him. Poor guy almost pissed his pants,” you say, laughing at the memory of the terrified look on the man's face.

“And you still don’t believe he’s in love with you?” she says.

“He would’ve done the same thing for either of you,” you say in defence of yourself.

“Maybe he would’ve threatened the guy, but he would never have pretended to be my boyfriend,” says Robin. You sigh and throw yourself against the mattress.

“Why are you so resistant to the idea that he might like you back?” Robin asks. “Maybe some romance would do you good.”

“Robin’s right. You two are perfect for each other. He’s an emotionally constipated loser with no social skills, and you’re an emotionally constipated loser with slightly more social skills.” Nami has gotten up from her bed and is kneeling beside you, leaning over your face.

“That was mean”, you pout, looking up at her. “I’m not a loser.”

“But you do suck at emotions.”

“It’s not that. I just don’t see why he would be interested in me,” you say, finally admitting what has been bothering you since you first developed feelings for him. The mattress on the other side of you dips, signalling Robin has joined the two of you.

“Y/n sweetheart, you’re smart, funny, and beautiful. There’s no reason Zoro wouldn’t like you,” she says, reaching out a hand to pet your head.”We’re telling you he likes you, but he's probably having thoughts similar to yours.” Robin is always a source of comfort for you, so you appreciate her words.

“Yeah, and your boyfriend is dumb as rocks, so you have to tell him,” Says Nami. You groan at Nami’s word choice.

“Whatever, I think we should go to bed”, you huff, closing your eyes in protest. Name and Robin give each other an amused look and get off of your bed. You drift off to sleep, trying to push the topic of Zoro to the back of your mind.

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You’re in the shower the next morning; it's your final day on the island, and you’ll celebrate at a restaurant later in the evening. You think over your conversation with Nami and Robin, and you figure there’s a possibility they're right. Before confessing to him, you decide to test the waters first and see if Zoro has feelings for you. You’re not the best at flirting, but you decide you’re going to try to hint it to him. After your shower, when you’re all changed into your outfit for the day, you go to the dining area for breakfast. When you enter the room, Sanji is bustling about in the kitchen, and Nami, Zoro, and Luffy are sitting around the table, waiting for food.

“Morning, Sanji” you call. The cook immediately turns around at the sound of your voice. “Think you can add an extra portion?”

“Of course, Pumpkin! Please take a seat,” he calls back, and you follow his instructions, taking the empty seat next to Zoro.

“Morning Pumpkin”, greet Nami and Zoro as Luffy greets you with your real name instead of the nickname. You cheerfully bid them a good morning and shuffle your chair closer to Zoro’s, who doesn't seem to notice until your knees touch under the table and he looks at you. You know you have feelings for him, but you're still thrown off by the way simply making contact with him causes you to feel butterflies. Sanji brings out the food, grinning at the instant praise he gets. He then retreats to the kitchen, knowing the rest of the crew will be awake soon.

“Food looks good,” you say to Zoro before shovelling it into your mouth. By the time you’ve finished only one bite, Luffy has cleared his whole plate and is whining at Sanji for another portion. “I can never understand how he puts away food like that.”

“It's pretty easy; I can’t do it as fast as he can, but I'm still pretty good at eating”, he says, noting his ability to demolish a plate of food in seconds.

“You can do a lot with your mouth”, you respond as his cheeks flush red and he freezes. You had initially meant his third sword, and it hadn’t crossed your mind that your response could be flirting. You fear you’ve made him uncomfortable as he’s never responded like this to flirtation before, and you quickly start to reassure him of what you actually meant.

“I didn’t mean it inappropriately; I just meant about your sword skills. Y’know, like your third sword thing. I wasn't talking about anything sex-related. I'm also not saying you’d be bad at it, and I'm sure you're great at oral-” You stop yourself before your rambling gets you in even more trouble. You and Zoro stare at each other for a second before silently turning back to your plates and continuing to eat your breakfast. You know Nami heard your entire conversation, even over Luffy's yelling, but she doesn't say anything to you for the rest of the day, which you’re grateful for. You spend most of your day talking to your crewmates on the ship. You accidentally fluster Zoro multiple times throughout the day. Not even attempts at flirting are causing his reactions, it's other interactions that could have way more suggestive meanings. He knows you don't mean them inappropriately; however, with the way your relationship has been changing lately, Zoro can't help but interpret them differently. At first, when he’s arguing with Sanji over their appearances, you compliment his physique, and he seems to shut down at your words completely. The second and final chance you get is when Chopper accidentally calls Zoro dad, and the whole team bursts out laughing, swordsman included. Through his tears, Usopp asks who the mum is, and without hesitation, Sanji and Nami both point at you. Everyone except you and Zoro laughs even harder. Poor Chopper is extremely embarrassed but only further proves everyone's point by crying about it to you.

“Y/N!. Everyone’s laughing at me. They're all so mean.” he cries, hugging at your legs. You lean down to his height and wipe some of his tears. You love Chopper, but you can't help teasing him a little.

“Oh Chopper, it's ok. Why don't you go and ask Daddy if he'll beat them up for you?” Chopper huffs and storms over to Zoro. Zoro barely responds to the reindeer, too focused on the fact that you'd just called him daddy. He breaks eye contact with you to pat the reindeer on the shoulder and threaten the rest of the crew into quieting their laughter. It only half works as multiple crewmates are still snickering under their breaths. Satisfied with the results of Zoro’s threat, Chopper sits next to Zoro. You think that all three of your unsuccessful attempts at flirting - even if they were unintentional - made him uncomfortable and decide that you'll apologise to him later when he's not surrounded by people. You excuse yourself to your room, saying that you'll start getting ready early. It's a perfect way to avoid Zoro without people getting suspicious.

You're in the middle of getting ready when the other girls enter the room. Nami and Robin both start comparing their wardrobe to the dress you have lying on the bed. When they decide on the dresses they want to wear, you get ready with casual chatter. Neither of them mention your green-haired problem. You try not to show your dejected mood.

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Zoro isn't as lucky as you. You're all the other men want to talk about as they get ready.

“I can't believe Pumpkin has been flirting with you all day. What do you have that I don't?” growls Sanji. Zoro would usually start listing off a bunch of traits, but his response this time baffles Sanji.

“She's been flirting with me?” he says. Sanji almost falls to his knees in pure annoyance.

“You're usually pretty observant, especially with her. Have you really not noticed?” asks Usopp. It finally all clicks in Zoro’s head, and he suddenly feels like he's going to throw up. You actually might reciprocate his feelings.

“I just thought she was teasing me”, Zoro says. You're no stranger to winding him up. His temper makes him an easy target for jokes.

“She called you my dad and then acted like my mum. She already thinks you're together,” says Chopper, heart secretly pounding at the thought of the two of you actually getting together.

“and I don't think she was just playing along with the joke”, adds Jinbe. “she looked very sincere.”

Zoro listens in silence, not having the energy to argue with six men as they recount your behaviour. Sanji points out how you had interrupted their fight to compliment Zoro specifically, and Luffy recalls your comment to him at the breakfast table, which makes everyone who wasn't there gasp. You've always been a jokester, but never have you gone out of your way to fluster someone like this.

“You need to tell her how you feel, " says Franky, the only one Zoro is even thinking of listening to on romance, considering he pulled Robin of all people. “Women like vulnerability and manly emotions. You've just got to be upfront and tell her you like her. Pumpkin is special; don't lose her,” he says, offering Zoro a thumbs up. Zoro just sighs and leaves the room.

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You finish getting ready and turn around to show off to Nami and Robin, who are more than happy to hype you up. Getting ready and chatting with your best friends always makes you feel better. They look equally hot, which you're not shy about telling them. When the three of you finally head out to the deck, all the guys are already there. You hear a few wolf whistles, Jinbe politely compliments, and Sanji stares at the three of you with tears in his eyes. Zoro, however, avoids looking at you until you're directly in front of him. His eyes flicker down your body, and you instinctively follow suit, checking for imperfections in your outfit.

“You look nice,” He says; it sounds like he's forcing out the words, but you thank him for the compliment regardless. The tension is thick, and you don't think you'll even make it through dinner without talking it through first. Once everyone is ready to go, you say something before it's too late.

“Can we talk first? I just want to sort this out,” you say, and he nods despite looking puzzled. “You guys go on! Zoro and I need to talk,” you call as everyone starts to leave the ship. They all immediately agree and walk away with smug, knowing smiles.

Now that it's just you and Zoro, you're still trying to figure out what to say. You look down at your hands, desperate to avoid eye contact, and search your mind for how to begin your apology speech.

“So, Y/n, what did you want to talk about?” he asks, prompting you to start. Zorosing your real name instead of your crew-appointed nickname startles you, and you finally look up at him. Zoro’s always been a scary figure to the public, but this is the first time you're feeling shaken by his presence.

“I just want to apologise for making you uncomfortable.” you stutter your way through your first sentence, and even more confusion washes over Zoro’s face. “It was completely unintentional, but I still accidentally flirted with you. I really like you, and sometimes, I say mildly inappropriate things on instinct. And I'm sorry if anything I did today made you feel bad. I'm also sorry for admitting I like you when you definitely don't like me back. Why would a man like you want me? Anyway, that's beside the point. I just wanted to say sorry so that we don't have to sit through dinner with this awkward tension I've created.” you say, taking a deep breath as you prepare yourself for his response. He takes a minute to take in everything you said to him, and you hope you didn't make it worse.

“Okay, first question. What made you think I was uncomfortable? I froze up because you flustered me, which you wouldn't have been able to do if I didn't like you." Your mind doesn't even register the initial question; you can only focus on the last half of his sentence. You don't know how to respond, being completely shocked. He continues, unbothered. “Second question, who says I don't like back? Why wouldn't I like you?”

“That's two questions.”

“don't deflect, baby” He takes another step towards you, hesitantly resting his hands on your hips. “look, I hate sugarcoating shit. I like you. The rest of this insane crew has been bugging me for days about coming clean. I like everything about you. How could you think a woman like you isn't enough for a demon?” You both probably look like idiots, holding each other with bright smiles. He's in your arms, and he does like you back. “Now, do you wanna go to dinner and pretend we didn't confess our love for each other or do you wanna kiss me?”

You don't even verbally respond to his question and lean up to pull him into a deep kiss. He kisses you back with a passion and strength that could only belong to Zoro. He's so sure in his feelings for you that it makes you weak in the knees. His tongue pushes its way into your mouth as his hands move over your body. Big palms smooth and squeeze every part of you they can reach, and you groan against his mouth as he grabs your ass.

“my bed”, you pant as he pulls away from the kiss. “If the others come back, then the girls are way less likely to barge in”, you explain, grabbing his hand and pulling him to your room.

As soon as you walk through the door you turn around to face him and pull him right back down to your mouth. It's easy to get lost in his kisses; they're reassuring you that he likes you and only you. His kisses are intense, and they make you dizzy. Your nails dig into his biceps as he moves his kisses across your jaw and down your neck. You let out a moan that makes him groan against your skin.

“Been waiting for this for so long, baby.” his voice has you in a chokehold. You couldn't focus on anything else if you tried.

“me too,” you whimper, moving your hand to his hair and keeping him in place.

“Can I mark you? let everyone see you're mine?” You frantically nod, and Zoro nips at your neck to let you know your response isn't enough. You don't need to be told. You know Zoro well enough to guess he'd want you to be vocal.

“yes, please.”

With your confirmation, he attaches his mouth back to your neck as he slowly backs you up towards your bed. His teeth anchor him as he sucks on the skin, marking it so everyone knows you’re taken. When he's finished, he trails his mouth back up to your lips and presses a soft kiss to your lips. He pulls back to take another look at you, and he feels whatever coils control his emotions tighten. You look beyond fucked out, and he's barely even touched you. You're staring up at him in awe and desperation, and he can't believe what he's seeing. He thanks every deity he doesn't even believe in that you're in front of him, looking the way you do. The way your eyes shine with love and respect makes him feel funny inside, and he needs to voice it so he doesn't explode.

“You're so beautiful”, he whispers, kissing you again. “You're too good for me” He adds. You protest but are once again cut off by his lips. His fingers find the bottom of your dress, and he looks you over again. “You look so good in this. Do a twirl for me?” when you oblige and give him a full three-sixty view of the dress, he whistles lowly. He gives you one last request to take the dress off for him while he sits down on your bed.

“Can you start me off? I can't reach my zipper,” You ask, turning around. Without a word, Zoro tugs the zip down your back, and you hear him hiss slightly at the sight of your bare skin. You face him again and slowly push your dress down your body, trying to be as seductive as possible. The satisfied smile on Zoro's face tells you you're doing a good job. You unclip your bra, and his eyes greedily take in the newly exposed skin. He's practically salivating in anticipation but remains in his seat and lets you finish. He audibly moans as you turn around and bend over, slowly pulling your underwear down your legs. You kick off your shoes and approach Zoro as he takes off his shirt so you don't have to be alone in your nakedness.

He lies back against your mattress, beckoning you to join him. You climb on top of him, pressing a kiss to his lips before trailing your lips across his chest and down his abs, stopping at his waistband. Your hands are shaky and desperate in their attempt to unbutton his trousers, but you do and follow it by yanking them down and exposing his cock.

He's big. That much was evident to anyone who looked at him, but you never expected it to be as big as it is. It clearly shows on your face as Zoro runs his hand through your hair.

“Don't take more than you can” he says as you swirl your tongue around the tip of his cock. As soon as you wrap your lips around him, he feels like he's about to burst, and he immediately uses his grip on your hair to stop you. “on second thought, if you suck me off right now, I won't last very long. C'mere,” he says, pulling you up his body. “Let me get you ready for me. Sit on my face, pretty girl,” he says, trying to help you get situated above his face.

“Are you sure?” You ask, hesitant to lower yourself at all. Insecurity creeps in on you as you think about the possibility that he might not like the way you taste or you might crush him. He growls at the question, almost considering it an insult, before he realises that you need reassurance.

“Do I sound unsure to you? You better sit that pretty fucking pussy on my face right now,” he says, pulling you down flush against his mouth. His nose nudges at your clit as his tongue explores your dripping hole. You're so disgustingly wet, and Zoro loves it. He's messy with his eating, making obscene noises, so you know just how much he likes your taste. The vulgar slurping of his tongue as he all but makes out with your pussy makes you slightly embarrassed, but it's so sexy how much he enjoys pleasing you. You lose focus quickly, unable to pay attention to anything that isn't your man's glorious tongue. His enthusiasm would've had you toppling over if it wasn't for the grip he has on your thighs. “Grind on my face”, he instructs, with a slap to your ass, and this time you don't waste any time before doing as he says. You're fast approaching your orgasm as you rock against his face, and all you can do is moan his name and reach down to grip his hair. When your first orgasm washes over you, Zoro’s grip on you holds you in place as he licks you through your orgasm. You haven’t had someone else make you cum in so long, and having Zoro there makes you feel more satisfied than you have in a long time. When your hips stop moving and your breath slows down, Zoro slowly moves you off his face and helps you lay against the pillows.

“You feeling ok?” he asks, although the giddy smile on your face and the dazed look in your eyes answer his question before you even open your mouth. The Zoro from a few years ago would’ve laughed at Zoro now, A man with the monicker king of hell giving his entire heart and soul to someone else. You nod at him, giggling as he rolls on top of you. He uses his arms on either side of your face to hold himself up. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down to kiss you again. You never want to stop kissing him, and he realises this when you don’t let him pull away to speak. The way you cling to him fuels his pride. He gives up on trying to talk and kisses you back. One of his hands squeezes your boob before trailing down the rest of your body and cupping your pussy. He plays with your clit as you make out, working your up again. You try to adjust your hips so that he can slip his fingers inside you, but when he doesn't do that, you groan in frustration. “If you want something, you gotta tell me,” he says, voice dark with lust.

“Stop teasing me and fuck me”, you whine, reaching between your bodies to grasp at his cock. He lets you guide him to your entrance before swatting your hand away. He slides his cock between your folds, gathering your wetness and gives his cock a few pumps to coat it in your juices.

“Are you sure you can take it?” he asks, unable to resist teasing you for a little longer. You let out a bratty whine and writhe beneath him.

“Of course, I can take it” " you insist, despite your worries that you can’t. You’ve never slept with anyone as big as him.

“Atta girl”, he mumbles against your lips before pushing his cock into your hole. “Relax for me, baby”

You try to focus on his lips, kissing and sucking wherever he can reach and relax your body so he can bottom out inside you. He gets three-quarters of the way in before he starts to get impatient. He takes a few shallow thrusts to ease himself the rest of the way in, and the feeling of your cunt wrapped around him tears a feral growl from deep in his chest. You are equally affected, head thrown against the pillows as you moan his name. He rubs at your hips, attempting to soothe you so he can start moving. When you give him the go-ahead, he pulls out most of the way and thrusts back in, slowly picking up the pace as you claw at his back, looking for something to hold onto.

“That's it, hold on tight, baby,” he says, encouraging you to scratch up his skin. You're the perfect fit for him; Your pussy grips him so good that you almost have him believing in fate for a second. He can smell your sweat in the air, and though it should be gross, he buries his face in your neck to inhale your scent even closer. Neither of you speak from this point, and you don’t need to. You’ve both already said you wanted, and now all that's left is the sound of your moans and the way your bodies intertwine. When you pull him against you, tilting his head so that you can attach your lips to his neck and replicate the pretty marks he left on your skin, he almost cums on the spot. He belongs to you as much as you do him. Your legs shake around his waist, and your moans devolve into high-pitched whimpering, signalling your impending orgasm. He's not far behind, so he reaches a hand between you to rub your clit, and you're instantly sent over the edge. Your orgasm crashes down on you as you arch into Zoro's chest as much as you can. Your legs lock around his waist, giving him nowhere to go but over the edge with you. You gush around him with a cry of his name as he groans expletives in your ear. He fills you up with his cum, cock twitching inside you. He doesn’t pull out when he's finished, choosing instead to get comfy on your chest until you calm down. His hands tenderly rub at your tired limbs. When your breathing evens out, he gently pulls his cock out of you, hissing at the loss of warmth. He leans down to press an appreciative kiss to your tummy.

“You’re all mine, yeah?” he asks, pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek.

“Always”, you respond, pulling him in to kiss your lips. His hands merely brush against your chest, and he feels himself getting hard again.

“What do you say we go for a round two in the shower?” he asks, playfully nipping at your lower lip.

“I’d like that”, you hum as he scoops you up and heads off towards the bathroom

✩♬ ₊˚.☁️⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The other nine strawhats sit around the table at their booth, eating their meals, when Luffy realises the two of you are still not there.

“Y/N and Zoro aren't back yet”

“If they're not back yet that probably means they're banging” says nami, through a mouthful of food.

“Don't even speak about Pumpkin with that idiot” grumbles Sanji, stabbing at his plate.

“Stop complaining Sanji, it was always gonna be them” says Franky.

“Well, guess we better wait a bit before heading back to the ship” says Luffy, still stuffing his face.

Everyone's been rooting for you two from the beginning.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

thank you for reading! hope you enjoyed :)

comments and reblogs are appreciated ♡

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

#one piece smut #one piece x reader #zoro x reader smut #zoro x reader #zoro smut #one piece #one piece imagine #one piece x reader smut #zoro imagine #anime smut #anime x reader #☁️.smut #☁️.onepiece #☁️.zoro

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mattitties · 3 months

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sworn enemy - matt sturniolo

I don’t have many enemies in my life. I try to get along with most people, and even if I don’t like them, I do my best to be friendly no matter what. But there’s one person that I absolutely cannot stand: Matt Sturniolo.

I moved to LA about six months ago, and the triplets were some of the first people I met. I got close with Nick first, then Chris, and I attempted to get close with Matt, but he was so closed off and became outwardly rude to me every interaction we had. I have no idea why he hates me so much, but I will not tolerate him giving me that kind of attitude for no reason when I’ve tried to be his friend.

So I don’t try anymore. I’m over at their house more than I’m at mine, and I’ve gotten to the point of completely ignoring that asshole when he comes into the room. Is it rude to ignore someone in their own home? Sure, but none of this would be happening if he didn’t make it abundantly clear from day one that he has no interest in being my friend.

Nick and Chris invited me over tonight to watch a movie, so of course I accepted. Despite everything with Matt, I absolutely adore Nick and Chris and would never turn down an opportunity to spend time with them.

“Helloooo,” I say when I walk into the living room, where they’re already setting up the movie.

“Hey!” Nick smiles as he gives me a hug. “Movie’s almost ready, you wanna get some snacks?”

I nod and head to the kitchen, saying hello to Chris in the process. I’m so invested in rummaging through their fridge that I don’t even notice Matt walk into the room until he groans.

“Oh joy, look who’s here!” he says as I turn around.

“Don’t worry, I won’t bother you,” I tell him as I grab some drinks. “Just go back to your cave and it’ll be like I’m not even here!”

He rolls his eyes. “I can feel your presence even from there. Seriously, who invited her?”

“We did,” Chris says. “Come on dude, isn’t this getting a little old? It’s time to get over whatever dumb shit you have against her and grow up.”

Matt shakes his head as he takes a box of Goldfish to the couch. “Nah, I’m good. So what are we watching?”

“Oh, so now you wanna watch with us?” I ask. “Two seconds ago you were acting like it was the end of the world that I’m here.”

“Well, this is my house, and I should be able to watch a movie in my house even when little annoying creatures are sitting on my couch,” he smiles sarcastically at me.

I say nothing in response. He’s such a dick.

“Oh, before I forget, do you want to come to TopGolf tomorrow night with us and our friends?” Chris asks me.

“I wish, but I’m going to a bar tomorrow night with my roommate,” I tell him.

“No worries, we’ll go another time. Matt’s not going either because he’s just too good for all of us, isn’t that right Matt?” Chris teases and pokes Matt’s stomach, earning a punch to his upper arm from Matt.

I roll my eyes at Matt’s clear inability to have any fun and sit back as the movie begins.

I should not have gone out tonight. I’m having the worst night. I should have gone to TopGolf with Chris and Nick. All my life choices are being regretted.

My roommate is currently in the bathroom probably sucking some random guy off, and I have somehow gotten in the middle of two drunk guys fighting over god knows what. The place is crowded and I’m being swallowed in a sea of people as I desperately try to get away from the fight before punches start being thrown.

I’m unsuccessful.

In the midst of the chaos, one of the guys accidentally nails me right in the eye as he goes to hit the other. He doesn’t even notice and continues going after him, but other people do notice. I really wish they hadn’t. I want nothing more than to just get out of there.

I push my way to the entrance and ignore the small crowd of people following me and asking if I’m okay.

“I’m fine,” I tell them, speeding up and breathing a sigh of relief when I make it outside.

The pain in my eye doesn’t even register until I open my camera and see it: red, bloody, and already starting to swell. I’m tearing up, and I can’t tell if it’s from the pain or from the disaster that is tonight. I need to go home, but there’s no way I’m going back inside to get my roommate, and she definitely won’t see if I text or call her. I could Uber, but I’m terrified of Ubering alone, especially in Los Angeles at 11 PM. I don’t want to bother Nick and Chris while they’re out, even though I know they would drop everything to get me.

A pit in my stomach rises as I click Matt’s contact name and text him.

are you up? kind of in a situation here and need a ride

Bruh

Call someone else

i wouldn’t ask unless i really needed help

please

I hate how desperate I sound, especially to him, but I’m cold and scared and in pain, so at this point I really don’t care.

Jesus fine where are u

I send him my location and wait. He pulls up ten minutes later, and I do my best to hide my tear stained and bloody face as I get in the car.

“Thank you so much,” I tell him, trying to control my shaky voice. “I’m really sorry, I just–”

“Are you okay?” he asks. I’m barely looking at him, but I can feel him staring at me.

“Yeah, why?”

He turns my face towards him with his thumb. His eyes widen when he sees my eye, which definitely looks worse than it did 10 minutes ago. “Dude! What the fuck happened???”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” I tell him, my eyes starting to well up again.

“You’re not fine. What happened? Who did this to you?”

“Nobody did anything, I swear. Two guys were just fighting and I couldn’t move fast enough and I got hit. It’s my fault, but I’m fine. It doesn’t even hurt,” I explain unconvincingly as I start to cry.

“If it doesn’t hurt, why are you crying?”

“Because I just wanna go home, Matt! Can you just take me home?” I sob.

“Okay, okay,” he says gently as he switches gears to drive. “Can I take you to my house? We need to clean up that eye.”

I nod and look out the window as he drives us home. He is the absolute last person I want to see in this state. I know he’s going to use this against me in a few days and he’s never going to let me live it down.

When we get to the triplets’ house, I make a beeline for Matt’s bathroom and look at myself in the mirror.

“Oh my god,” I mumble. I look awful. My eye is completely swollen and it’s turning purple. I have a gash in my cheek. “Why the fuck did I go out tonight?” I say as Matt walks in behind me. “I have to go to work looking like this! I’m not gonna make any tips! People are gonna throw up looking at me!”

“Okay, calm down,” he tells me. “Sit on the toilet. I’m gonna clean it and get you some ice and then you can just chill here, okay?”

I nod and sit down on the toilet lid as he gets a cotton ball and some hydrogen peroxide. He tilts my chin up to look at him. “Little sting,” he mumbles. I scrunch my face at the feeling of the peroxide on the cut. “I know, I’m sorry, almost done.”

He dabs the cut a few times and throws the cotton ball out. “Come on,” he says, motioning me to get up. “Go lay down and I’ll get ice.”

I silently oblige and lay on his bed, giving him a small smile when he returns with some ice chunks in a ziplock bag covered in a paper towel.

“It’s the best I could do,” he says when he hands it to me. “We don’t have any actual ice packs.”

“It’s great, thank you.”

He lays down next to me and turns on the TV. I’m not even paying attention. All I can think about is trying not to ask the one thing I desperately want to know. I almost keep myself from saying it, until it just comes out of my mouth like word vomit.

“Why don’t you like me?”

He looks at me, his eyebrows slightly furrowed. “What?”

I immediately regret everything, but I ask again. “Why don’t you like me? I mean, Nick and Chris both like me, so I would assume you would too, but like… did I do something to you?”

He sits up and turns the TV off. “I dropped everything tonight to come save you from a bar. Why don’t you think I like you?”

“You’re just so mean to me. You have been since the day we met. And I don’t understand what I did to deserve that. If you don’t like me, that’s fine, I just want to know why.”

He doesn’t say anything for a moment. “I do like you. I never meant to make it seem like I don’t, I thought we were just playing around. Like friends tease each other, ya know?”

“Well yeah, but… you’ve never done anything to make me think we’re friends, so…”

“I’m sorry,” he says. He opens his mouth like he’s going to say something else, but then closes it.

“What?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “Nothin. Do you want to stay here tonight? I can get you something to change into.”

“Oh,” I reply, completely taken aback by this. “Yeah… yeah, that would be nice. Thank you.”

He offers me a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt which I take into the bathroom and change into, discarding the ice pack in the process. I take another look in the mirror and sigh.

“God, I look fucking disgusting,” I say when I climb back into his bed.

“You look beautiful,” he says so quietly I have to double check if I even heard him correctly.

“Don’t tell me that just because you feel bad for me.”

“I’m not.” He turns on his side to face me. “You are beautiful.”

“Why are you being so nice to me all of a sudden?”

His eyes are moving between my eyes and my lips. I’m starting to put the pieces together, and it’s terrifying.

“Because I’m tired of pushing my feelings down and making it your problem,” he says. I don’t say anything, I just give him time to explain. “I didn’t want to like you because you were Nick and Chris’ friend first, and I didn’t want to ruin anything. I thought being a dick would make my feelings go away. It didn’t.”

“I like you, Matt,” I whisper. “I have since I first met you. It made me so sad to think that you didn’t like me. And I’m sorry I’ve also been mean to you.”

“Don’t be sorry, I deserved it,” he says. “Do you still hurt?”

I shake my head. “Not really.”

“Good,” he says before lightly holding my cheek and pressing a soft kiss to my lips. I freeze for a moment, not fully processing what’s happening, and then I hold his wrist and kiss him back, our lips moving perfectly together.

It’s clear that neither of us have any intention of taking it further tonight. We continue to kiss for just a couple minutes until we separate, doing nothing but staring into each others’ eyes.

“Goodnight, Matt,” I say.

“Goodnight.”

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo smut #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo x reader

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austinsastrology8991 · 1 year

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Mercury in da HoUSe (s) mercury and why you think your smart - you only think your smart, you don't even know if you are because you can't think any other way. I dont care if people tell you your smart, they don't even know if they are smart because they have the same dilemma as you....... but if you think your dumb your probs right.... okay enough chit chat we gotta do some astrollogy >> Mercury in the first - These guys talk the talk, hella good at talking, talk too much, but at least they know how to talk. but it gives everyone in the rooom a headache. also there voices go a million directions... they like to put on voices. actually i hate your voice. its too earpiercing its like your looking at there voice even if you look away. how are you able to make me look at yo voice, its meant to be auditory but i can fucking see it STFUUUU Mercury in the second - I like money but not as much as this guy. this guy will think of every scam, every business every investment possible just to prove his worth (typically with money) as kids they are hustlers with money, everyone knows they gonna make coin, but typically as they get older, money don't mean shit to them and they start investing into something substantial and if they dont grow outta this mindset, they become shells of themselves like bill gates or the amazon guy. mercury in the third - okay these guys are actually smart, but its almost hard to tell. because there intelljgence isn't attached to anything beside intelligence itself. so its hard to notice, but they are very smart people. quick learners but i notice not quick thinkers, or at least they don't voice it much. which i guess makes them smart because they ploying liek dat mercury in the fourth - subtle intelligence, almost manipulative intelligence, they are the types to make you make a point jsut so they can point out the flaws in your point rather than make a argument themselves.... then make an argument once yours has been smashed to pieces. assholes honestly... but i rate it its just smart tactics but make em talk first and they speechless lmao mercury in the fifth - funny yes your funny, yes i see what you did there, oh yes this next joke is also funny because it ties in with your last joke.. did i mention your funnY? oh im not that funny, well im sorry i can't do it like you becayse yourr liek for real funny. okay can someone else speak now, this guys voice wasn't annoying but now it is. fr comedians but every comedian over do it, and so do they mercury in the sixth - annoying intelligence, always pointing out the flaws in whatever the fuck you just said. like dude im trying my best to think, to then speak it, and to respect you as a person. and your lookjing for flaws, in my speech? oh you can't help it? well i can't help but not wanna talk to you. annoyingly nitpicky with what i say you say she say, why so serious? oh your too smart? thats what every dumbass has ever said to me stfu. mercury in the seventh - always on your back, but can you get off my back, im still working on my argument i dont need you to suck me off about it jeezes. id rather you criticize me honestly. oh now your critical of me. well why can't you just think for yourself. oh you don't know how to. you only don't know how to because you just wanna learn more and more and more and more and more. and now you dont know how to think for yourself. congrats you played yoself mercury in the eighth - so mysterious wow so profound, i never saw it that way. no you just were thinking of something cool to say this whole time and you jsut thought of it. your only quiet so you dont look like a fool. insecure bitch ass. oh but now you just wanna insult me yeah thats because i called you out. honestly these guys are just looking for a deep chat, and its only deep because they were digging for so long.

mercury in the ninth - these guys know way too much bullshit. like they read a lot and just spit random facts and its hard to talk to them without feeling patronized. like yeah we get it, you read a lot. most peole don't because we like to be a human, not live in a book. go outside its nice. oh thats where you get your information > outside, books, the world is your dictionary - god you really are annoying. oh you knew that already. fuck off man.

mercury in the tenth - shrewd; always thinking and saying the best possible thing to say for each scenario, and its typically just sayings they read in hustler books, or what they dad said once. yeah your street smart, but no one else advertises it as much as you, which means you don't understand the streets as well as you think. yep thats right re-strategise; they just wanna own the streets i swear. and no one tries as hard as them. and thats saying something mercury in the eleventh - stop protesting you mong, you really think convincing us the realities of the world, will change the world? oh itll start the butterfly effect, okay true go on, tell us how eating veggies gonna stop the meat industry. oh you were just saying this crap for bants. yep that was annoying. oh now you wanna talk about how attitudes has shaped the world, dude why you always trying to integrate everysingle philsophy of the world into one conversation. you do realise its all bullshit? but everyone likes em because they invite everyone in on the conversation... hey someone gota do it Mercury in the twelfth - these guys are the worst i swear, cant be more manipulative than these lot, they will act innocent, but come at you aggressivly, and itll just confuse ya. youll think they just dumb and naive but they klnow damn well what da hell they doing. play yo game with someone else... oh you don't like to play with them because they fall for your shit, yep so you only like people who set you straight ehhhh you should just come at me straight or ill set you straight. oh you just struggle with convos well it shows.

#astro community #mercury aspects #house placements #astrology observations #astrology notes #astrology blog #astrology #astrology houses #mercury astrology

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tang3r1n · 5 months

Text

still on my shitty dabi kick and i think i struck a chord with @mostlyheinous so here’s random ass shit i think a deadbeat bf dabi would do

18+, hard dubcon, gaslighting, manipulation, smoking, forced drinking/taking of drugs, dabi purposely makes you have a bad trip on acid, unprotected sex, anal (referenced plus a thumb in the stink) i’ll add more idfk

kay first off, along the smoke vein, dabi would absolutely threaten to put his cigarettes/blunts out on you if you keep crying (openly, he loves watching you cry all quiet n sniffly)

he’s also no doubt changed you around the apartment with bugs/gross shit just to make you squeal and beg him to put it away

“baby it’s jus’lil beetle~” while waving a fucking 4in long roach he found outside in your face, “gimmie a big, sloppy kiss and i might throw Jeffrey away, as much as it pains me to.”

constantly making you exchange physical/sexual acts for practically basic respect

“show me your pretty tits and i’ll let you go hang with those stupid cunts— no i’m not gonna stop callin’em that, they’re dumb cunts.”

loves making you suck him off right after work, still all musky from the day, his cock even more salty from sweating all day (scent/smell kink is my fav im SORRY.) plugging your nose and jutting his hips out harshly to make you gag and cough around his cock, the sinfully wet noise making him groan out a chuckle as he watched you cringe

any and all attempts to change his behavior end with gaslighting and fake hurt plastered on his face as he breaks your fucking back in bed

“ungh- you’re such a fucking good girl f’me.. i love your, pretty, im so sorry you feel the need to accuse me of such things- god squeeze my dick like that again, fuck yeah- i..uh- gonna make you cum so hard, show y’how this noisy cunt ‘sall mine..”

steals your panties and jacks off with them right fucking in front of you, dick swinging and balls out as he strikes himself with your panties pressed against his face. his bright ass blue eyes piercing into you while he noisily huffs in the smell of your pussy and licks up the crotch of them like the perverted degenerate he is

oh and when you try to break it off, setting him down to explain that he is just..too much.. for you, he goes ballistic.

grabbing you by the hair and dragging you to the bedroom, placing you down still surprisingly softly as he ferociously tears off your clothes and starts eating you out like his life depend on it (idk to him it might, he’s a loser)

once he’s got you all whiny and soft after a few mind-shattering orgasms, he’ll start coping and trying to slip you back into the haze of his glaringly obvious manipulative love

“don’t say stupid fucking shit, pretty, jus’cuz y’on your period or what-the-fuck-ever is going on in that lil head don’t mean you can treat me like this.”

hell chastise you while he fingers you, fingers blurred as he finger-fucks you dizzy, fishing his cock outta his dirty jeans and scoffing as you whine and cry again, shuffling up the bed

he pulls you in again by your ankles, a scarred hand quickly silencing you as it softly pressed against your throat, a silent threat, as he spoke patronizing words to your sex and lust filled mind,

“just be my good angel one more time, pretty,” he forces a crack in his voice, flexing his throat so he sounds tearful and sad, “i just..i love you s’much, wanna show my pretty girl, my everything, how much she means t’me,”

the second you nod he’s grinning manically and flipping you over, forcing his cock into your wet cunt and rabidly humping against your ass, dick barely leaving and inch before pumping right back in as deep as it’d fit.

he’d spit on your other puckered lil hole, making your cry and squirm yet again as he pushes his thumb against it, gut burning with lust and a perverted sense of affection

“no- nononono angel- calm it down, i jus’wanna feel your cute ass ‘round me, promise it’ll just be my thumb— yes pretty i pinky promise

(he ends up cumming in your ass i don’t make the rules mb)

other than failed breakups and gaslighting, dabi also likes getting his pretty wasted

like… really wasted.

dabi’ll give you shit after shot, even making you sit pretty for him while he spits Jack Daniels into your awaiting mouth

he spikes literally all drinks he makes you and it’s so obvious but he just tells you it’s to ‘loosen your bitchy ass up,’ but in his own special, joking tone.

cut to you blowing cum bubbles while you suck him off, completely drunk, head dizzy and body fuzzy as he records you almost mindlessly salivating over him.

“say hi to Shigaraki f’me, pretty, little bastard is gonna love seeing you all horned up and slutty~”

he also shotguns his blunt/pipe/bong hits to you—never lets you hit in your own

dabi loves it if you sit on his lap during this too, a rare domestic scene of you both just vibing and grinding, soft praises and touches that feel unreal coming from him

the he ruins it by slapping your ass and making you cook him dinner

wait i had a funny idea hold on

“babe can we please go see my momma today— it’s just that it’s m’birthday and you made me skip it last year..”

“pretty, that bitch hates my ass, why would we go see someone who hates us?” (notice he says ‘us’ anyways)

[cut to momma glaring at dabi the entire time they’re over and throwing shoes at him once he opens his fucking mouth]

kay that’s all for now ig

wait

sometimes when you’re falling asleep you can hear him obsessively rambling and mumbling abt how much he loves you, how disgusting everyone else alive is, how he’d kill anyone who dared talk to-LOOK at you, how he thinks you’re such a soft, beautiful little thing that he just wants to protect but oh how he fucking loves ruining your angel wings.

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babiebom · 3 months

Note

Hey! I’ve been into SDV for a while know and I found your profile and it’s absolutely amazing! Your headcanons are so accurate and your writing is so smooth! I love it all! I saw that you take requests, so could you do headcanons for Stardew Valley Bachelors and Bachelorettes reactions when they find out that the farmer has a prosthetic leg?

(Love your work💗💗)

A/N: thank you for enjoying my work!! I try my best to write everyone in a way that I think is accurate so it feels good when people say that they think it is. Again if anything is offensive or wrong let me know!!!

Tw: some cursing, maybe some mean things/judgement/ableism because let’s face it not everyone is nice, a person without a prosthetic writing about it. let me know if anything else should be tagged!

Bc: at least 5 for each!! Some are shorter than others!

Stardew Masterlist

Sebastian

I feel like Sebastian would try to act normal about it but would be like….

Hmm okay

I don’t think he would react outwardly

He would try to keep things inside

And I don’t think he’s ableist

But he would be like

OMGOMGOMGOMG in his mind

He wouldn’t ask questions either

He’d just act like everything is fine when in reality he’s now panicking like……..

Is he supposed to act different? He doesn’t think so? Is that rude?

Is terrified of losing you and doesn’t want to mess anything up.

When he does ask about it tries to do it in the most non offending way possible.

Because he is curious about it

I don’t think anyone else in the valley has prosthetics

So he does want to know everything

He’s really nosy tbh

But acts all emo and as if he isn’t and that he doesn’t care

If you wanna ever talk about it I think you would have to bring it up first

Sam

OH COOL ya know *insert some random thing*

He wouldn’t be all “omg I didn’t know I’m so sorry” about it

I think he’s similar to Emily in this

In that it doesn’t really change his view of you

Would probably say offensive things though

Like on accident and because his mind is coming up with dumb questions and he has no impulse control when it comes to his mouth

Would ask if you could be like a pirate

Or ask if it means you can skateboard better than him

Would probably give you a kinda offensive nickname

But again hes doesn’t mean to be stupid about it

DOES change his tune if you don’t like it

Would never want to continue doing something that you actively dislike

Does ask every question that is on his mind

I feel like rather than the others he’s much more comfy with you

So doesn’t hesitate to ask about anything he lacks knowledge on

Shane

Depending on where you are in your relationship he has different moods

Like if he hasn’t opened up and is still depressed and an alcoholic he would be VERY pessimistic about it

Would probably get your spirits down

Would also probably say VERY offensive things in his melancholy state

Would say sorry only after you say that he’s being rude about it

If it’s after he gets help no matter if you’re dating or not he’s still like…

Oof

About it

Y’know? But he wouldn’t be an asshole either he’d just be like

Are you okay? About it if it makes sense?

Like it’s not an omg are you okay it’s more of a how are you feeling about it way

Like no matter if you’ve had the prosthetic forever or got it more recently his question is the same

How do you feel about it?

Does really care about your thoughts

I do think with him you’d have more deeper conversations than with anyone else other than maybe Harvey

Alex

While I don’t think he’s very judgmental on purpose

He probably would say some rude things

Or react in a rude way

Maybe thoughtless is the right word?

Like he isn’t going to be mean or anything

But he will say something like “oh like a pirate or something!”

And you’d be like “??????sure I guess….?”

Would want to swing your prosthetic leg around for shits and giggles

Understands that it’s expensive to get proper prosthetics but it’s in the back of his mind

Wouldn’t really treat you any differently unless it’s something that he thinks could hurt you

Even if you can do it alone

He’s like “NONO let me do it!!”

I don’t know what type of person you are but I know that’s either a relief so you only have to do easy things or it’s annoying because you’re perfectly able to do things on your own.

Is always impressed that you can do your farming duties.

Like it’s sorta ableist?

Like he’s a little confused but he has the spirit type of thing

Harvey

His first thought would be

Damn how good is your insurance

Or if you had to pay out of pocket for it

Is a doctor after all

I think he’d be curious in a doctor way

Because again I don’t think anyone else in the valley has a prosthetic (Sadge bc diversity is cool)

So he hasn’t really seen them that often

Would probably be very intrusive if you two are close

Would also back off if you weren’t okay with it

Does however become very….worried? About you

I don’t think worried is the right word

But would remind you to take breaks more often than he would a farmer without one (and even then it’s pretty often)

Like a mother kinda

Is kinda ableist but doesn’t realize because he thinks it’s just his doctor side

Again will stop if you want him to

Would absolutely have some interesting facts about prosthetics

Elliott

Would try to be poetic about it

And it’s either very cringy or cute based on hope you think of him

Would probably try to write a book or story or poem or something about a character with a prosthetic

Does get a lot of things wrong with the facts but tries

Because you are his muse

And his characters reflect you even if he won’t admit is until you’re closer enough

Might change something’s up about it though so it’s not exactly you

Just in case you hate it so he could be like “nononono this character has a DIFFERENT prosthetic hehe”

I do think he’s ableist but again like the others not in a judgemental kind of way just…..uninformed

Will listen if you try to teach him

Will also fight anyone who has anything to say about it

Haley

Depending on where you are in your relationship makes her reaction different

Like before she opens up I think she’d have a mean girl type of reaction

Like she’d make a face and everything and ask rude questions.

Like it would genuinely either make you mad or make you feel bad

She’d be like “WHAT THE HELL??”

And you’d be like “tf???? Are you okay?”

She’s ask VERY personal questions

Partly because she’s curious and partly because she has to make fun of you by being a bitch

But if you’re closer when she finds out she’s just like…

Taken aback and like oof but that’s the extent to it

I think if you’re closer she’d be too scared to ask any questions because while she gives no fucks she likes you

Whether it be in a romantic or platonic way

And she doesn’t want to push you away or anything

So she won’t really comment on it other than being like “oh….okay….”

Will fight anyone who says something about it though

Like even if they’re asking a valid question or something she’s like “ABSOLUTELY NOT”

Emily

Doesn’t react at all other than being like oh cool!

Honestly I don’t think she would think anything different of you, or even think that anything has changed now that she knows

Like you have always been the person that she knows and your limbs being different doesn’t mean anything because why would it?

Does make you cute accessories for it if you allow it though

Makes covers, will bedazzle it, literally whatever you want.

I think out of all of the bachelors and bachelorettes she would be the one to make it the least weird.

Like the others would either ask really insensitive questions or act weird about it

She’s like <3 yeah okay anyways do you wanna see this dance I’ve been practicing?

Like sorry I don’t have many headcanons for her she’s just….normal when it comes to things that other people would deem weird(not to be ableist I hope you know what I mean by this bc people are asses)

Penny

VERY ABLEIST

But again not in a judgy way

She just….

She means well but it’s kinda annoying if you don’t want help

Just like how she shoves George’s wheelchair out of the way at the mailbox to help him

It’s like first you should ASK if someone wants help

And second helping isn’t always what you think it is

Would help you without asking if you want it

Acts like she just is so much stronger or whatever

Is VERY embarrassed after you talk to her about it

Might try to argue back that she was just helping

But ultimately realizes that she was kinda overstepping

Just wants to make things easier for you

Abigail

Would think it’s cool

Asks dumb questions like if it gives you an advantage over anything that others wouldn’t think about

Forgets about it half the time tbh

Like it doesn’t matter to her

And thankfully she has make herself her own person outside of Pierre’s beliefs bc child her would’ve been mean

But she does think it’s cool and like the others has a million different questions

Asks them nonstop

Also like Alex asks if she can use it as a weapon

Sometimes offensive but not often I don’t think

Would probably say some bullshit like you’re part robot or something

Again depending on how you feel she either keeps up this joke with you.

Or lets it die out

Cooler than most about it

Leah

I think she’s one of the ones that doesn’t react

Because she’s lived in the city

I think she has come across a couple people with different kinds of prosthetics

So she isn’t like the others with a million questions or anything

It’s much more normalized for her that she doesn’t really comment or question it

Will ask if she could create one for you out of wood just to see if she can

Also one of the ones that would knock a bitch out for coming at you in a rude way

Would probably have a “yeah and?” Reaction if you wanted her to actually react

Like it doesn’t change anything at all for her.

Maru

Would be stoked

But in a science type of way

Would also wanna see if she could make you a new one

Unlike Leah though Maru would probably be a bit offensive

Mostly because I don’t think she understands social norms or anything

So she would ask things that would be unamusing and uncomfortable for you because she really just….

Doesn’t understand that there’s things that you shouldn’t say or do

Is overwhelmingly positive though

Like tries VERY hard to get you to understand that nothing has changed for her

Is a little annoying about it but just really wants you to know that she likes or loves you no matter what

Would probably have some interesting facts about prosthetics as well

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throwingmetothelions · 10 months

Text

NSFW ALPHABET - Noah Sebastian

I’m once again reminding you because some of y’all don’t seem to understand and it’s making my fucking eye twitch … THESE ARE THEORIES. I know that some of you are younger, and you are new to how fandoms operate, but the whole point of this is to make a compilation of theories about someone based on content that is free floating in the fandom. The information that I’ve been given by people in private is never something that you will ever see me actually write about, so don’t think it is. NONE OF THIS WAS FOUND BY DIGGING OR PRYING (THE TWO ACTIVITIES SOME OF YALL CANNOT STAY AWAY FROM). This shit is theories and personal beliefs based off things we have as a fandom. Do not fuck it up for everyone by accusing anyone of prying. Do not ask me questions about unrelated shit. Do not ask me to answer your thoughts and concerns. ANYWAYS HERE YA GO BESTIES.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Noah is the one with the forethought to go ahead and grab a dirty t-shirt and keep it by the side of the bed. There’s probably already water he was drinking, and that’s gonna have to be good enough lol mans will check up on you, but if you’re looking for full blown mushy romance book level aftercare? Yeah, it doesn’t live here.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Noah is clearly working hard on his physical appearance. From what I can see there was a lot of bulking going on, but we see big ass muscles in those arms. He’s very proud of that. Noah isn’t the type to get transfixed and brain-dumb over something, but I feel like he likes legs. Likes the way they wrap around him, and the way they bend when he pushes someone’s knees back when he’s fucking them.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Oh boy. Has absolutely tried his own a few times out of pure curiosity. Tries his best to just jerk off in a shower so he doesn’t have to clean anything up, but he’ll wipe it away with something out of the dirty laundry bin. The man literally liked a meme regarding this so I KNOW I’m RIGHT when I say he wants to cum in you and he wants it so deep it doesn’t come back out. He doesn’t even want to see it.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Has an obsession with panties and I mean this in the “if yours go disappearing please go bang on his door” way. There’s something about the way they feel, all the colors and patterns (this stupid nerd would buy you Naruto panties and I hate that). Like he would jerk off with them wrapped around his dick and send you pictures about it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s pretty experienced, but I don’t think it’s in the way you all think. You can have so much casual sex and not really be learning a ton, ya know? Like if all you’re getting are random quick hookups for the most part … how experienced are you actually? That being said - he’s ABSOLUTELY the type to have read up on and researched techniques just to keep in his back pocket.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Ha. Ha. Hahaha. I’m laughing because he has a Mars in Sagittarius, so this is going a few ways. He likes to be spontaneous when he has time, so anytime you say “hey do you wanna try …” THAT is his new favorite position. Immediately. The frankness and the roughhousing that comes with that says he would play wrestle until you were no longer playing, and your hands were held above your head while his big ass body all but put you through the actual mattress. So.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Goofy?!? He’s too goddamn nervous to be goofy what do you MEAN. His heart is about to thump out of his chest because, if like most women you wait for him to make the first move, he’s so fucking shy about it. He would definitely appreciate it if you laughed off things like him getting ahead of himself or making a funny noise when you switch positions though because it works as an icebreaker.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He trims it all up. I know he does not have a ton of hair everywhere, but obviously when someone has a lot of tattoos, you can no longer truly see the amount of hair they have on their body. His legs are actually a lot hairier than you think, and he has a happy trail, so I think he just trims it all up.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Oh, it’s Noah’s time to shine. If you give him a reason to be he could be SO romantic. This bastard is an artist. He is a writer. He can set a vibe unlike any other man you’ve ever met (and I swear to god the LED lights are involved unfortunately). If it’s slowing down that you need … Noah’s got you. Neck kisses, eye contact … just please don’t expect it every time. You would absolutely have to tell him ahead of time.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I actually firmly believe that he used to not jack off a lot, but now that he’s working out and his stamina has increased he probably does it a little more now. Likes the way his rings and bracelet feel when they touch his dick. Doesn’t make too much noise, but he’s a big lip biter. As we said, likes to do it in showers, so after they play which is also when he’s sweaty and full of adrenaline.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

What we’re not gonna do right now is get into the Mommy Issues ™️, and I think if you asked him to call you that he would tell you to get the fuck out (I’m serious) BUT … he could absolutely fall asleep with your nipple in his mouth. Like as a comfort thing. He would ABSOLUTELY ask to watch a show with you and slowly and wordlessly unzip your hoodie and take one of your boobs out and just kinda hang out there in the quiet dark while he sucks away and THAT is actually a kink. I do not take criticism thanks.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He loves him a good risk, but not if people he knows could be involved. Like he’ll wanna fuck at your house because he really doesn’t want Jolly to hear you, but if it was a bunch of strangers at a bar he wouldn’t think twice about fucking you in the bathroom. He also really loves the bed honestly. Mans is a big ol lazy bear after he comes and he definitely wants to pass the fuck out after yall go at it.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Seeing you in his bands merch gets his dick absolutely rock solid. We aren’t gonna talk about the narcissist streak he has (I also do not take criticism on this because believe me it’s there), but seeing you in a shirt that barely covers your ass AND has his bands name on it is too much. Also, running your hands over his chest? I feel this one in my bones dude I just know that this makes him feel some sort of way.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Noah wouldn’t actually ever involve one of the direct members of the band into a threesome. I’M SORRY. TRUST ME THATS NOT GONNA STOP ME FROM READING THE FICS AND HAVING MY SILLY LITTLE THEORIES BUT he just wouldn’t. Too close. He would, however, tag in Davis, Kodi or Jesse and I know you bitches wouldn’t complain about that. Again, please god don’t pull the mommy card on him. With this one, I see it being something like he’s either immediately going to tell you that he can’t do this at all now, or he’s going to do it, but then he’s going to feel some type of way after, and it’s actually really going to affect him. He’s going to get inside his head and have a meltdown.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He’s a giver. I’m the one that gave you that post. I’m the one that one of his exs contacted. I don’t know a lot about all the things in the world, but I know a little something in this department. Noah eats pussy like a starved man and there’s nothing more dangerous than a man that is hot and enthusiastic. You stand 0 chance. He’s highly skilled. He loves getting blowjobs, but if you’re looking at scales they’re absolutely tipping one way.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

So, for all of you out there that may not know, when a man doesn’t have great stamina or he doesn’t last very long cardio and working out can really help that. Noah has done a 180 in terms of exercise, so I think he’s the type to deliver a fast and hard pace but not really think about it. Like he’s so into it and he’s taking in the sounds you make not realizing that he’s picked up the pace.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Doesn’t love them because CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF MEN DONT ALWAYS GET TURNED ON LIKE LIGHTSWITCHES. Noah would need to be teased all day while he’s trying to do other shit if you want to just spontaneously pull him into a broom closet and expect him to perform.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Again … birthchart says he takes risks but I believe they’re calculated. Like the risk of fingering you when you’re on the phone with someone is one he’s willing to take, but he planned it. He also loves to take risks in the bedroom. What happens if he rubs here? What happens if he bites there? Hmmm.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Noah strikes me as a singular really long round kind of guy. Sure, he’ll get you off once before he even takes his clothes off, but I do think he gets sleepy easily by nature because he has personality traits that align with Snorlax and Winnie the Pooh. Noah will absolutely make it feel like it’s stretched on, and he won’t stop until he’s not sure what language you’re muttering, but he’s not taking a break and jumping back into it. His idea of a break is eating you out while he calms down.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I think he may have experimented once or twice (we’re not gonna pretend like he hasn’t been pictured with three different dildos before) but he doesn’t really see a need. Now, for you, he’s absolutely gonna do whatever it takes to get you off. You wanna use a toy while you’re fucking him? Go for it. He really wants to watch you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Here’s the thing. Noah doesn’t MEAN to. He’s not upset that he did, but seriously he didn’t mean for you to see the strip of skin on his belly when he stretched. He didn’t know that him moving your hair to the side to kiss behind your ear would have you gnawing at your lip. He doesn’t do it on purpose, but when you crawl over him and kiss him until he can’t breathe and then call him an asshole for doing that all day it makes him want to fuck you until the sun comes up.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

It’s all under his breath.

“Jesus Christ”.

“Holy …”.

“Yes - fuck, yes”.

He’s the type to grunt while he’s biting his knuckle when he comes. See, and I know that not all of you have thought about this but it’s the fucking truth, most men are conditioned to be very quiet when they cum and it’s because they were once horny teenagers and they couldn’t keep their hands out of their pants. They had to sneak. Noah has been sharing rooms with people his entire life … this man hasn’t learned to let go and let it all fly. He holds back.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Random headcanon? Weed makes Noah incredibly fucking horny, and he can come twice when he smokes because his dick won’t relax if he only cums once. I don’t know why y’all all say he used to smoke … yeah he used to smoke cigarettes and quit, but he still smokes weed - just a whole lot less. That’s why it’s exciting when he takes a few hits. I had an ex that was like this and it’s actually pretty hot so I’m assigning it to Noah because it makes the most sense with him.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

There are actual bitchbabies on tumblr.com that are mad because they say that nobody should say anything about the fact that we can clearly see his dick through some of his stage outfits. Listen to me - yeah it’s weird to jump in a strangers inbox and talk about your unhealthy obsession and what you want to do. But. He is a man, and he has a penis, and this is an NSFW alphabet based on theories, and it is not my fault that it is fucking visible through his goddamn pants. THAT BEING SAID BASED OFF OF WHAT WE CAN SEE ON BEYONCES INTERNET - he’s a shower and it ain’t small.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He gets in his head so often. The number one sex drive killer is stress, and I think he definitely, if he has a partner, can go for a long time without having sex if he’s got too much band business. You would definitely need some open communication. Although lucky for you - he celebrates band wins and personal growth with sex. I guarantee that one positive phone call from Matt would mean you get bent over the kitchen counter.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I think he’s falling asleep pretty quickly but it’s also because of the setting. Like I said, our boy loves a good fuck in a bed. That, combined with the soft LEDs, the lofi beats and no overhead lights means he’s already accidentally set the stage for sleep. Just blow out the candles and tell him ya love him because he’s gone.

#bad omens fanfiction #bad omens fic #bad omens fanfic #auntievwroteit

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chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter · 3 months

Text

Shinichiro, stay away from the kids!

(with love)

Okay, first of all, this is not a hating Shinichiro post. I swear it. This is just me having brain riot and thinking in how many times Shin was a questionable example for kids and teens around him and how we seem to forget about it but it's kinda hilarious when you put all of them together (except for Sanzu, that is never funny, my poor lil gremlin 😭)

I know most of this things were because he was also too young, oblivious and reckless. I know that, but it's funny to bully him with affection anyway 🙈

(and in the more serious ones, he was too dissociated and too out of everything, I know that too)

So... Here I go, random Shinichiro moments for all of you!

(big manga spoilers because it's Shinichiro)

Leaving Inupi to look out the shop.

Inupi, who looks like a cute potato here and it's deffinetly too young for it. Canon unpayed intern Inupi, yuhuuu! 💜

Him smoking around bikes all the damn time.

In his shop where Inupi was and could blow out the whole block. But also in his garage, where Draken and Mikey used to watch him fix the bikes. Shin, don't, that's dangerous! (I would say "if you wanna kill yourself do it but don't drag others with you", buuuuuut... Yeah, he did it and everyone got drag on that, so why bother to say it? 😑)

Wharever the fuck this was.

Probably just a prank, but.. Really, Shin? You ran away and left Izana there? I know, I know, you're a dumb teen, but c'mon, think for once! The whole interaction makes me laugh and want to smack Shinichiro in general, to be honest.

Oh...I think the not-so-funny ones are about to start. Here we go!

Leaving the Black Dragons to the traumatized orphan that just went out of juvie.

Yeah, that looks like a great idea, I'm sure nothing wrong will come out of this, lalalalalalala! (Shinichiro and his relationship with delinquency and his siblings should be a lot more explored because holy shit)

(Btw, not even pointing the helmets stuff, nops)

Bringing 8 y/o Mikey to gang meetings.

Like... What the fuck? I'm with Takeomi on this one, are you stupid Shinichiro? What are you thinking? Are you thinking? 😒

Love how BenWaka bully him for it too, that's why I left it here, ngl.

Isn't that just how Haruchiyo is, slashing people for Mikey?

Well, yeah, he is, but he wasn't! He shouldn't! Can't you not pretend this is not concerning for a second? Or... Not settle this mindset on Sanzu because it's gonna have big consequences? 🤦🏻

Talking about his inminent suicide with a 13 y/o.

Okay, I thought A LOT about putting this one, because obviously I'm not judging Shin at all, he was in a really dark place and when you're about to kill yourself you can't think clearly. It's just that this exchange... Breaks me. And Haruchiyo is just a kid, this is so not fair for him either 😭

(Sanos, start treating the Akashis like people with feelings that also matter for once, please)

You can still be his friend even if he scarred you for life!

Okay, Shin, I know you're a mix of biased and dissociated but... Really? Please, stop creating Sanzu, stop iiiiit! Let Haruchiyo alone, don't do this! Also... "Right now"? So you're saying he should forgive Mikey but not right now? Is that, Shincihiro? 😒

Trauma dumping to 13 y/o Haruchiyo. Shhh, keep the secret, bye!

Did I say Shinichiro created Sanzu? Yes? I'll say it again, I don't care. Again, I know he was dissociating and all, but, but... It's fine to kill people for Mikey mindset is now installed successfully on Haruchiyo's brain, yuhuuu! 😭

The amount of total disregard for Haruchiyo's mental health here is too much and should be a crime. The "keep the secret" part don't make it better. Specially, specially, when Shinichiro himself is not going to keep it, he's about to say everything to Wakasa. But Haru? Shhh, you should keep the secret, I'm sure this is not a huge burden for a teenager that suddenly have two set of memories!

(Well, not everything, he probably forgot to tell Waka about Haruchiyo remembering it, because in the final battle it didn't look like Sanzu ever talked about it with Wakasa and I wanna think they would if he knew... Look, another Sano forgetting about Sanzu, yuhu! 😑)

(Shin, with all my love, but I hate you for this one even if you gave me the best blorbo to torture on my fics that I ever had)

I'm sure you'll be able to handle it, random kid that I don't even know the name! 👀

YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS ONE SHINICHIRO! I wish you remembered in the final timeline because you own Takemitchy the biggest freaking apology of all your life! What the hell? Go, apologize with Michi now!

Yes, he was able to handle it and to be traumatized infinite times in the way, but that's not the point! Use you brain for once Shin, why are you giving the burden to a kid? Why? What is wrong with you? (so many things actually xD)

But, for real, this sentence is Wakui being hilarious because c'mon, poor Takemichi!

Edit: I didn't put the poorly way Shinichiro handled everything about Izana and Mikey because I consider canon doesn't give us enough info on that. Same with Emma. What happened? Why Izana never met them? I have my hc, of course, but we don't know for sure. So... I can't ramble about how badly he managed that! (Badly, for sure, I just don't know exactly how and how much)

#well it started with me making fun of shin and ended with rambling ablout tl0 and not being that funny #what can I say?#shin i still love you but please go to theraphy before talking with more kids #and apologize to michi #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers spoilers #sanzu haruchiyo #sano shinichiro #hanagaki takemichi #original timeline

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uchihabbynic · 2 years

Text

One Piece - Relationship HC’s (ft. Zoro & Ace)

warnings: small NSFW sections/18+ under the cut. oops 😏

Zoro:

1000% loyal as fuck. Zoro’s ability to be unbothered by practically everything comes into play here as he’d find one girl he actually gives a shit about and decides he can't be bothered with the rest. After all, his primary focus is training to get stronger and becoming the World’s Greatest Swordsman, not getting distracted and thrown into a frenzy by every woman he see’s like that dumb cook, Sanji.

He isn't the grand gesture type of man and not exactly a romance expert but he’d hone in on the little things that make you smile as his way to reassure you and make you feel loved.

Speaking of reassurance, the man is terrible at vocalizing how he feels about you so it's safe to say he’s a “I can show you better than I can tell you” type of boyfriend - making his love language Acts of service and Quality time. He will fight till the death for you, sail across harsh seas for you but ask him to spill his guts and he’ll freeze, becoming a grumpy, flustered mess.

He loves to simply exist in your presence. You don’t have to be doing much of anything and the swordsman is just… at peace. Whether you’re napping together, tucked into his big muscular arm or if you’re caressing his minty hair while he’s passed out in between your legs, Zoro is one happy man.

(NSFW)

Sex with the swordsman is usually intense, sweaty and filthy. Zoro isn’t really the love making type. However, on occasions, like your anniversary or if he’s feeling particularly needy and missing you more than usual, he’ll slow it down by rewarding you with deep, slow strokes letting you savor every inch of him.

With that said, Zoro typically likes it fast and rough when milking his cock with your pussy. He loves to fuck by either holding you tightly against a wall and or free standing since his muscles are as big as your head and he thoroughly enjoys gripping the soft meat of your plushy ass while he slam you down onto his fat cock over and over, ramming it deep inside your wet hole making you drool and blabber nonsense.

Basically, he loves to fuck you dumb.

God Bless, Roronoa Zoro.

Ace:

Best boi Ace is the boyfriend you’d love to have. He’s a good balance of all the best things. He’s passionate, goofy, charming, a protector, big golden retriever energy but he knows how to be serious when necessary.

Can be hot headed but rarely ever directs his anger towards you. If he does, he’ll feel like shit afterwards. He won’t wanna go to bed still angry and while he’s quite stubborn, he’ll realize he needs to apologize when he fucks up.

Like Zoro, Ace isn’t the best verbal communicator when you both speak about your feelings but he doesn’t necessarily shy away from these conversations either, especially because Ace loves reassurance. As a man who carries many insecurities, he really appreciates when you tell him how much you love him, need him, how much he means to you and he’ll do his best to do the same.

He eats that shit up, ok? Lives for it.

Ace’s love language is definitely Words of Affirmation and Touch. Ace loves to be all over you. He can be a bit clingy and doesn’t shy away from PDA (even in public). If you were with your crew mates, he wouldn’t tongue you down in front of the group but planting a gentle kiss on your lips or even giving your ass a small, playful squeeze is not out of the question.

The boy is definitely loyal despite being a bit of a flirt before you got together. He knows how to appreciate exactly what he has because he knows how precious time spent with loved ones is.

(NSFW)

Is 100% into lovemaking. Even when Ace was single, it was rare he’d fuck randoms just simply trying to get his dick wet as he really prefers sex to be full of passion and mean something to him. Souls intertwining as your bodies do.

Ace is a wildcard though. Some nights he may want to fuck you roughly, watching you lose yourself on his massive length but most nights he likes to take it slow and steady, planting gentle kisses on your lips while his cock kisses your cervix.

Ace will whisper sweet nothings in your ear while fucking you, telling you that he didn’t know how much he needed you, that you’re his everything or just how pretty you look full of his cock.

He will definitely hold your hand while having sex (intercourse or oral) and depending on how clingy and emotional he’s feeling - may end up crying and saying how much he loves you in the afterglow of the steamy session.

Loves when you cum together. It’s like, the ultimate high for him.

Acey boy is simply a 10/10 - no questions asked.

Tags: @titanialev 💗

#one piece headcanons #zoro x you #roronoa zoro #zoro headcanons #portgas d. ace #portgas d. ace x reader #ace x you #one piece smut #zoro smut #ace smut #hc's #one piece hcs

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k1ngdom-of-thieves · 1 year

Note

Can you do this https://at.tumblr.com/k1ngdom-of-thieves/hi-there-can-you-do-headcanons-for-the/qpbnbhv4sgel but with the vice dorm leaders?

Of course! Thanks for coming back :)

Vice Dorm leaders + Finding out reader is a girl

Trey Clover

Poor guy genuinely had no idea that you were until you told him. Depending on if you told him during book 1 or waited until later to tell him, he’ll feel slightly embarrassed or absolutely mortified that he made that mistake.

He’d apologize anyway but will still feel really guilty about it. Let him bake you a pastry or something just so he can feel better over it. Those things look so good anyway.

He asks if the others in the Heartslabyul dorm know and if you’d like him to tell them. He doesn’t mind telling them, although he might be a little embarrassed if he was the last one to realize you were a girl.

“Is there anything specific you’d like me to bake? I know you said it didn’t bother you, but I still wanted to apologize somehow.”

Ruggie Bucchi

Ruggie had a feeling that you were a girl. Your scent was different from the rest of the guys so he had a feeling. Still feels great to be proven right tho.

He won’t ask you about it because: 1 it’s really none of his business, and 2 there’s no guarantee that you’ll actually tell the truth when asked. So he waited for you to tell him, if you ever wanted to.

He’d ask if you told others about this before making jokes. If you said yes, prepare for the dumbest jokes you’ve ever heard. Almost constantly.

Ruggie’s gonna try to get you to do dumb shit with him just so he can’t get in trouble with Leona. He kinda forgot that only you wouldn’t get in trouble and he would still get his ass kicked.

“Hey (Y/N), wanna hear something fun we could do? How about we go into Leona’s room when he’s in the observatory and take a couple bucks?”

Jade Leech

Jade was actually surprised that you were a girl. He never really thought about it since it was an all boys school, but he’s realizes it must’ve been obvious in hindsight.

His surprise only lasts for a little while before it turns into his signature off putting smile. He chuckles and comments on how difficult it must’ve been to be the only girl for a few miles. Bro do you know how terrifying that sounds.

Of course he wouldn’t try to do anything to you. yet He’s just letting you know that if you need anything, your friends at the Monstro Lounge are always here to help. For a price.

If you’re worried about someone harassing you, just ask Jade to help you. He’d be more than happy to stand threateningly behind you to scare away anyone who tries to get to you.

“Just remember if you ever need anything, you know where to find me. I doubt anyone would want to bother you after hearing we’re in cahoots.”

Jamil Viper

Jamil did have the passing thought of you not actually being a guy. It wasn’t something he took seriously, it was just a random thought. ..right?

Until you told him that you were a girl. Even though he had thought about it before, he never once thought about it actually being true.

Don’t think that he’s taking this negatively, he’s just completely in shock. He’s actually really happy that you decided to trust him with this information.

He’s more than willing to help out with anything you might need. He has a younger sister, so he has a general idea of what to do if you get any pains or discomfort.

“I’m going to Sam’s shop to buy a couple of things. Would you like me to bring you a few things? Don’t worry, I won’t make you pay me back.”

Rook Hunt

Rook 100% knew you were a girl before you even spoke to each other. How? Don’t question it, his answer probably wouldn’t make much sense anyway.

He wouldn’t say anything about it before you told him, he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable! Bro you cross that bridge a while ago. He wants to make sure you’re ok with others knowing that you’re a girl before walking around school announcing it.

Thinks it’s so beautiful how you manage to make connections while being so fundamentally different from everyone around you. He finds your stubborn strength to persevere inspiring!

Will tell tales of your efforts even if it was something really mundane. He just wants you know that he sees how hard you try, in his own odd way.

“Oh how have I been blessed to see the trickster and her companions beat the odds yet again!”

Ortho Shroud (Completely platonic)

Ortho’s sensors initially told him that you were a girl, but he thought that there was an error and had Idia check them out. It was only after Idia told him there was nothing wrong, he finally realized that you were actually a girl.

He’s gonna be a little confused for a while, he didn’t know that it was possible for a girl to attend an all boys school. Then again, most schools don’t have robot younger brothers so he figures he’s in the same boat as you.

He doesn’t mention anything to you until you tell him, he doesn’t want to accidentally make a friend uncomfortable. Besides, he’s learned not to point things out before others tell him. Once he pointed out Floyd’s jacket was missing buttons. Didn’t end well.

Installs applications that help him understand more feminine topics. Even if you aren’t into traditionally feminine things, he just doesn’t want you to feel isolated.

“I hope I can help you when you want to have someone to talk to. That’s what friends are for, right?”

Lilia Vanrouge

Lilia had no idea that you were a girl, but he isn’t that surprised. He’s seen a lot of different people in his time, so a girl in an all-boys school is honestly pretty mundane for him.

Aside from the simple change of pronouns, his treatment of you is really similar. He treats all of his friends the same, so he never needed to change how he acts around you.

He does get a little protective of you around some of the boys. Father’s reflex. With him on your side, most of the student body wouldn’t dare bother you.

Don’t be afraid to ask him if you need anything, he’d be more than happy to help. He may seem like he has a lot on his plate, with watching over practically everyone in his dorm; but he doesn’t mind doing something for you now and then.

“Well, I’m glad that you trust me enough to tell me. Let me know if you need someone to talk to. I’m sure that with my many years of walking this land, I might know something to make you feel better.”

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lanawinterscigarettes · 4 months

Note

Hello, there! I would like to request a Jennifer Check x reader, please? Some fluff, please? Thank you.

oh, absolutely! hope you like what I came up with <3

Clothing Troubles (Jennifer Check x reader)

Warnings: Jen's a clothing hoarder, mild and brief swearing, this is actually really sappy and sweet

"How can you have so many outfits and yet still find nothing to wear?" You asked while sitting on Jennifer's bed, watching her going through her dresser drawers looking for something to wear for the date you were taking her on.

It was nothing fancy, just a simple movie, but naturally her being the drama queen she was she needed to blow even the smallest of a circumstance way out of proportion.

"How can you have so many outfits and yet I'm constantly seeing you wear the same old sneakers and ratty hoodie?" She shot back, clearly frustrated.

You held up your hands in defense. "Hey, it was just a simple question, not an attack on your character."

She gave you a glare before shutting the drawer and moving on to the closet. "This is ridiculous," she said with a frown.

You let out a sigh, hating to see her so upset. "Look, I know it's important to you that you always look and feel the absolute best, but I think you're perfect just the way you are, okay?"

She scoffed at you, rolling her eyes. "Oh, of course you would say that."

"Jen, I'm serious." You got off the bed and made your way over to her. "I always think you end up looking incredible. Hell, I think you look amazing right now."

She pretended to be ignoring you, even though she really wasn't. "...go on," she said after a moment's pause.

"I think you're so beautiful," you continued, "and funny, even if you do have a really twisted sense of humor, and I think you're the focus point of every room you walk into."

"You're wrong," Jennifer corrected, finally paying you some attention. "I am the focus point."

"See? So you shouldn't stress so much." You take one of her hands in yours and press a light kiss to her knuckles.

"Oh my god, you are such a sap." Even if she was acting like she was annoyed with you, you knew what you said had affected her, and that she really did care. "Fine, I'll just find something random and throw it on. But if we run into anyone important while we're out, I'm going to be so pissed off."

"More important than you? Never."

Likes < reblogs | comments are greatly appreciated <3

Main masterlist | Jennifer's Body masterlist | wanna be added to my taglist?

🏷 taglist: @anxiously-sad @iloveentrapta @ghot-girl @taecube @corn3liiia @gilmore-angel @your-next-daydream @alexxavicry @noisy-dumb-piece-of-shit @lovelyy-moonlight @red1culous

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willowser · 2 years

Text

oh me, oh my, the cowboy bakugou brainrot that i have HAD. i've decided he's perfect for it. 100% has it down pat. whew doggy. can you IMAGINE him in his levi's and his soft cotton tee and his square-toed work boots hello??? HELLO???? and a HAT goodbye

he's like. okay so he's this guy from your teeny home town, right. someone you knew in high-school, maybe weren't friends with but had classes together and had friends of friends of each other. and he was always kind of an asshole and had a truck by the time he was like 16 and never could go out on the weekends or stay out late bc he was always helping his dad. and he never left -- but you did.

and you come back on a random night, for whatever reason, and your old friends take you out to some local bar that you can't believe is still up and open and running and. he's there. little drunk and loud and so fucking handsome. tan from working outside, fit from lifting hay and roping horses and his hands are rough and maybe a little dirty and he's just in a shirt and jeans but god. he looks so good.

and he's so smooth too. all "fancy seein' you here" and "looks like someone grew up right", smells like fresh cut grass and sharp aftershave. pats your hips to get your attention. oh yeah, you're going home with him. no doubt. he still drives that fucking truck, single cab, and before he even can get out of the parking lot, he's got a hand up your shirt and his mouth on yours and he's got to physically strap himself in so he can drive back to his house.

and he's great and rough and you can't believe the best sex of your life is from this country boy from back home. wild.

but. he's still kind of an asshole. and by the morning, he's grouchy and not as smooth and leavin' by the crack of dawn bc he's got shit to do. the little chickens in his yard are talking outside his window while you get dressed, maneuvering around his home as carefully as you can. being in there alone, knowing he's probably ready to be rid of you -- makes you feel like you're doing something wrong. so you call your friend to come get you, sitting on his porch -- that he built himself, by the way -- and just. watching him. out in the field, sheepdog running behind him and the horse he's riding. he's got his hat on bc the sun is fully out by now and beating down on the back of his neck and you can tell he's already sweating.

he lives a little further out of town than you or your friend realized, so you're just waiting when he comes back to sit beside you on the porch, all quiet. his dog comes up too, relishing in all the attention you give him until bakugou pushes him away, telling him to get on.

he doesn't smile as much now that he's sober, just frowns at you. "didn't think i'd see you 'round here again."

the dog comes back and you don't care. you scratch at his fluffy ears anyway. "didn't think you'd notice i was even gone."

he snorts, boots scuffing in his gravel drive as he shifts. "don't be dumb, 'course i noticed."

and you two weren't friends in high-school, hardly ever spoke to one another. maybe saw him in the hallway or thanked him when he opened doors for you. sat in front of him in class or next to him on those rare friday night football games he got to go to, when it was starting to get cold and he would give you the carhart off his own back just 'cause you were shivering and he ran hot anyway.

and he still does, beside you on the porch. when you look up from his dog, he's peering at you with all that heat, tipping his hat up a little to see you better.

"got eggs 'n shit, if you're hungry. if you wanna --" he lifts the bottom of his shirt to wipe at sweat on his brow and yeah. yes. whatever he's gonna say. yes. "if you wanna stay and eat."

good thing you got no phone signal out there, bc you didn't really wanna leave anyway.

#i'm never gonna stop thinking about this #one day i will write a small town cowboy au #mark my words #the yee haw in me will be pleased #pls !!! he would be so cute !!!#i'm sick over this concept i can't get it out of my head #feral about it so embarrassing #bakugou drabble #bakugou x reader #[ ☆ willow wonders ]#✿ thoughts: bakugou #✿ theme: cowboy bakugou

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dilucsfav · 1 year

Note

saw ur masturbation headcanons and was sad as hell that there wasnt itto included :c pls write for itto too!

OH NO OH NO IM SORRY ITTO MY LOVE

ofc i'll do itto!! i havent done general hcs w itto, so that'll be what this kinda is!! except the nsfw will be your request bc we can forget about our grand arataki itto <3

Itto hcs and scenarios!!

warning(s): nsfw!!

favorite places to kiss you are your wrists, ears, thighs, and omg your back idk he would absolutely kiss your shoulders down your spine and AHDJKkjasjfkaw

^^ after youve had a long day or just need to relax in general, he'd totally totally give you a massage and trace his kisses all over your back in doing so

^^^^ ORRR OR when you two are taking a bubble bath together, youre laying in between his legs and leaning against him, his fingers tracing your back and running the bubble suds down your body... god god and he just will occasionally kiss spots on your back and UGDGSHd

he is so perfect. protect baby at all costs <3

HE'D PAINT UR NAILS AND YOU'D PAINT HIS

this ones random but but when he cooks for you he would totally wear the dumbass "kiss the cook" apron EXCEPT it would say "kiss the oni" and he'd make you kiss him LDAMSKDK

when you hang out with him and his arataki gang, yall would just all do dumb shit together and god it would be so so much fun i wanna hang out with the arataki gang too

^^^ FUCKKCSDSJ HE'D BE SO MEAN AND FUNNY AND TOUGH WITH YOU AND HE'D DO WRESTLING MATCHES WITH YOU AND THE GANG WOULD CHEER YOU ON he'd feel so betrayed by his friends cuz they want him to lose sobs

i can imagine him constantly taking you to inazuma in late nights to take you on ramen dates. ahh itto baby❤️❤️

HE SNORES SO DAMN LOUD LMAO he could wake up a whole damn castle with his loud ass snoring

this is so random but he'd totally play dress-up and run around with the kids in inazuma for their and your entertainment (thats canon bc i said so)

with aratki duties comes not-so fun times,,, when he gets hurt, youre usually the one to tend to his wounds

^^ CAN U IMAGINE THIS MEAL OF A MAN GAZING AT YOU LOVINGLY AS YOU STICH UP HIS WOUNDS?? A SIDE SMIRK CUZ HE THINKS YOURE BEAUTIFUL AND APPRECIATES YOUR GENTLENESS WITH HIM, WHILST YOURE CHIDING HIM AND TELLING HIM TO BE MORE CAREFUL

"You're dazzling, (Y/N). Did you know that, lovely?"

this is kinda gross,, but you'd always find nasty shit in his hair (bugs, dirt, etc) 😭

^^ then you proceed to yell at him for being gross and helping clean him up constantly

he adores you so much oh my god

i feel like itto would yell at you a lot, but like playfully yk? he knows when and when not to raise his voice jokingly depending on the situation

he'd constantly bring you brownies ?? LMAO LIKE ODDLY SPECIFIC DESSERT, I COULD JUST SEE HIM BRINGING YOU EITHER BROWNIES (fudge brownies only, they are superior) OR RAW COOKIE DOUGH😭

nsfw:

i always see people saying like "oh kazuha could break the bed" or "oh childe would totally break the bed" and i kindly disagree,,,, CUZ ITTO?? TOTALLY WOULD???

one of the fucking bed legs on the frame would just snap and homeboy would just stop and laugh about it with you (and then do absolutely nothing about it and continue)

as i said in the ceo itto hcs, there's a good balance of rough sex, gentle, etc etc

its never fucking vanilla sex though...

^^kinky, hot, sweaty...... good god im going straight to hell for writing this

he'd throw your legs on his shoulders and would just go absolutely mad on your-

sorry. god hes so hes so so so

SUCH A WHINER WTF

when he masturbates and thinks of you stop stop he’d be so rough on himself and would just wish you were there to help him

HES SO DAMN LOUD- gorou could probably hear him masturbating from a fucking mile away😭 AND HES PROBABLY YELLING UR NAME TOO SO GOROU WOULD JUST FREAK OUT AND GET SUPER UNCOMFORTABLE LMFAO

hes ABSOLUTELY into face sitting. he loves it so much, he could let you sit on his face for hours if you wanted tbh (me next pls)

this is random, but i think in a way he'd kinda be into roleplaying?? but like within that when he's more dominant he'd wanna see you with a blindfold on.

^^ i think he just finds pleasure in your expression, knowing that youre not sure what hes gonna do next? and you'd find thrill in the unknown cuz itto is so random so you wouldnt know what to prepare yourself for? you know what i mean? hes so baby girl

"Oh? You like it when I run my fingers right there, hm? Tell me."

oh my god when you two are in the moment he'd have one hand gripping your hip, and the other would be in your hair jerking it everytime he goes in,,, FJIAHFJKASBFUKASHFIK

sorry.

hes so kinky help- i couldnt say like his FAVORITE thing but i think ONE of his favorite things to do to you would be choking

yall yall hes such a heavy breather and grunter its so hot

i think afterwards hes such a big baby. loves sleeping with his face nuzzled in your chest, ear against your chest to feel your heartbeats bc it relaxes him so much

ITTO<333333

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin fluff #genshin fanfic #genshin smut #genshin impact smut #genshin itto #arataki itto #itto headcanons #itto x reader #itto fluff #itto x y/n #itto smut #itto x gender neutral reader #genshin imagines

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azurlily · 6 months

Text

Dont ask where this came from, but I was tired and came across a tumblr post abt means lesbians. My first thought was, mean lesbian gf smut???." So now you get: Mean Lesbian NSFW!

She's a bit of a yandere, but that's okay we love her anyways.

TW: The three G's. Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss!

Mean Lesbian

NSFW

[ML stands for Mean Lesbian, I dont have a name for this character yet.]

The whole Mean lesbian stereotype never fit in my eyes, I mean becoming nice for the sake of your girlfriend? Yeah no, how about making your girlfriend worse than you, for the sake of yourself? That's right up my alley, but when you like a girl that's as sweet as apple pie...it takes time to get her to your pace.

"All I'm saying is that she deserved it, I don't care if people think I'm doing it because I like her. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. She was flirting with you."

Very recently a bunch of nude pictures of some random girl had gotten out around school. The culprit being none other than ML, she'd been out snd proud about it. Knowing damn well no one could, nor would do shit. Her daddy has money, her moms a lawyer, how are you meant to fight someone like that?

You aren't, and that's the point. No on is meant to be able to fight someone with power like that. So no one does, and ML likes it that way. No matter how much her sweetheart disagrees.

Quiet whimpers and soft sighs bang around the room, while ML was having her little monologue her girlfriend was in a sticky situation.

On her knees, head laying against ML's thighs, a thick ball gag in her mouth, and pink silk adorning her skin. Soft cries attempt to leave the girls mouth, although it's all in vain. ML runs her hand through the girls hair, and dark smirk on her face.

"Oh pretty girl, my baby girl. You look beautiful you know, you look like a piece of art. Ready to be torn in two, just for me..."

Fake innocence runs thickly in her voice, she wants you to think she pitys you. She wants your dumb brain to think she cares,(which she does) think she loves your weak, useless body.

ML's hand grab at your body, slowly pulling you up on the bed. She's picked up heavier girls than you, she used to be a cheerleader and then she didn't even enjoy picking them up. She gently sets you up, just on her lap. Soft hands running up and down your back, up and down your ass.

Her face is bright red, while ML has had plenty of girls in her bed before, you're her favorite. Which is exactly why she made you her public girlfriend a while ago. Well, you don't know you're her girlfriend, but everyone else does. That's good enough for her!

You feel two long fingers press against your entrance, her long slender fingers scoop up some of your slick. She puts the two fingers in her mouth and sucks on them. She continues this activity by rubbing you with her fingers, giving you just the tiniest sparks of pleasure. Then taking it all away as she tastes you.

You whine louder and louder, you like foreplay but this was too much. You'd pass out before even getting to actually cum as this rate! You whine and attempt to move around, quickly remembering how she has you tied up.

Your arms tied behind your back, your feet tied but not your legs. She wants easy access, one of the rops running down your back onto your ass. And tightly around your chest. ML mentally praises herself for such amazing work.

ML hears your whines and sees your breaking point arising.

"Oh, I know baby, you wanna cum so badly! So let's make a game out of this, I'm going to take that pretty gag off and ask you a few questions. For everyone you get right; I fuck you more. For every wrong answer; I spank you. Seem fair?"

ML didn't wait for you to nod your head, she took the gag off and asked the first question:

"Am I better at fucking you than your exes?"

You feel two long finger slide inside of you, while her other hand is on your ass. She's just waiting for a wrong answer, or maybe she's waiting to reward you...

"Y-yes you're better than them!"

You answered as honestly as possible, and you were greatly rewarded for it. You feel her fingers pump in and out of you, you whine loudly as moves them through you at a painstaking slow pace. She slows even more as she asks the second question:

"Good answer. Second question is easy: would you ever cheat on me...or have you?"

Cheat? You two aren't even dating, right? Right? You ponder for a second too long and a sharp hand slams down on your ass. Your cry out, but it doesn't matter and she does it once more. After the second time she stops, you don't dare move or speak for that matter. Her fingers stop and you almost cry at the loss, you dont though because you know what would happen.

"You took too long to answer, I'm talking it as a yes. And because of that I'll be asking something different for my third question. Were you actually flirting with that girl, hm? Or did I just take it the wrong way and...accidentally ruin her reputation?"

There wasn't any anger in her voice, quote the opposite, she was happy and you knew damn why. You've seen how obsessed she gets over someone, you're the example after all. The worst part is that you hated that girl, that's exactly why you were in fact flirting with her. You knew exactly what she would do, and you loved it.

"I- I was flirting with her, why are you jealous? Green isn't a good color on you-"

She gently flicks you on the back of your head, you don't need to look up to know the look on her face. Angry with a hint if pride.

"Hm, wrong answer."

#wlw #lesbian #im bad at this #women are hot #i cant write #mean lesbian #mean girl x fem reader #oc x reader #oc x fem reader #wlw nsft #lesbian nsft #love mean lesbians #mean lesbian x fem reader #gaslight gatekeep girlboss #corruption kink

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noxx-33i · 30 days

Note

Hello I have come to word vomit RGB trio thoughts and headcanons. Beware some of these will probably be nonsensical and not in order.

I think skate has the worst fashion taste out of the three. I can't say much on this though cause I also have an atrocious sense of fashion/lh

Boombox and to an extent Skate talk in 80's slang. Like radical, bodacious, hella, etc. 80's coded boombox just lives in my head rent free and i can't kick him out/silly

Their alcohol tolerance from lowest to highest goes: Skate, BB, Sling

BB and Skate crash at Slingshot's place ALL the time. At this point even Shuri and Vine are used to them just random showing up

^^continuing this I think they like to enter through anywhere but the window. Most especially Skate. BB at the very least is willing to act like a Normal person and use the door SOMETIMES. Skate however if he uses the door you'll bet that he's going in on his board. Whether or not he immediately crashes and breaks something inside is another thing/lh

Sometimes they'll just have Katy Perry Sessions with Shuriken. Like literally just listening to Katy Parry. Don't. Don't ask why I don't know either/lh

^^they have California Gurlz memorized.

If one of them does a crime none of them are snitching. If one goes down they all go down if one admits to it the other two will admit to it too. No bro left behind/silly

Sling is the smartest academically in their group and is probably the best at math. Not saying he's a prodigy im just saying BB and Skate are probably dumb as shit with math /lh+aaff

Sometimes Skate likes to record his Sick Moves™ and sometimes it would Also be in a place he proooobably shouldnt be in so Sling and BB take turns being on either camera duty or watch duty. Whether either of them are good at it is a different discussion/silly

Skate was caught stealing by the police once but BB was there and somehow he managed to trick them into believing he was Skate's lawyer and that he did not steal anything. Sling watched from the distant absolutely flabbergasted

Sling prices his menu very high and whenever someone asks he's just like "Oh yk, inflation!" and somehow it always works

they like setting fireworks off at night. Sometimes BB can't come cause he's too tired from work or something tho so

Despite Slingshot being the most academically smart in the group Boombox is the one who would hesitate when given a big shiny red button that could nuke Crossroads. Sling and Skate would see a shiny red button and go "ooo shiny" then BOOM!!!! /silly

idk if you want this but I have an au with my friend using the skins ingame (and some we made up for it hehe) where Snowboard and Rainbox were highschool best friends and they would get into shenanigans together like light theft (Rain is the distraction), parties maybe, etc andddd I love them very much

Snow in the au has canonically tried to rizz up a girl (in High School) only to bag her boyfriend AND her brother

^^The au takes place years later when Snowboard is in college (in Blackrock college cause there's no faction wars in this au) and when he comes back he finally meets Cozyshot who is Rain's roommate and erm my friend likes skateshot so I think you can tell what happens next (GAY PEOPLE) /silly

Okay im gonna stop rmabling now have a good day silly muah/p

IM GONNA RAMBLE TOO AND Oh my god ur so right on the first one.

SKATE HAS TERRIBLE FASHION SENse. I can smell it. Hes so sweaty he doesnt care ab his looks too much but bb would say "youre not going out like that

YES I AGREE. Boombox is stuck in the 80s and he doesnt want to leave. Im actually picking up these habits i wanna say rad so bad.

Skate being the lowest is the funniest shit wver bc i love bullying his ass. Did you tell i put NO EFFORT in his stupid hc reveal HEELP

I FEEL LIKE ONE DAY THEY MIGHT GET A SECRET HANGOUT PLACE… like fully furinisjed and with ac and all that fancy shit. How? Idk illegally? They probably have board games and dnd sessions with trusted friends who keep the place a hush

Bro theyre not normal they will never be normal… "GUYS HOW DID YOU GET IN" // "We lock picked your door" // "WHAT THE FUCK"

> lowkey skate would learn lock picking for fun and hed get so good at it he would be tempted to steal more stuff

>> that being said.. rob the bank?/ref

LOWKEY i feel like bb was a nerd in his younger years but grew out of it… he would probably like science facts and everyone thinks hes smart but hes not.. AND YES sling being math smart is so real teehee. Hes the expenses guy but also cant stop himself from spending more than he needs to

Skate n BB would get into so much trouble but no one can ever find them guilty in some fucking way and it makes the authorities so mad

Ironically id like to think Zuka easily catches them doing dumb shit but he doesnt care enough to report it

Sling has probably done tax evasion one or two times.. or more….

Ok cute hcs to vomit out… with ur mention of tired boombox i feel like sling and skate would immediately go to bbs place and crash not in a chaotic way but like ogghd.. ÖIKE THEY MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER BY GIVING SNACKS OR MASSAGES TO HELP HIM LOSE STRESS

Literally any time one of the RGB members get their vibes off its instantly to care land bc bcbc bc 😞😞🙁🙁😞😞😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 *sobbing crying throwing up* theyr besties 😭😭 this xan be both platonic or romantic i legit do not care i love BOTH

With that in mind i feel like whenever skate and bb crash over sling would have a few of their favorite pastries from his cafe saved in his fridge… like dog treats LMAOO

This is likge.. dog-cat-dog relationship… but all are chaotic as fuck /silly

YOUR AU SOUNDS SO SILLY PLEASE I WANT TO SEE!!!! I WANNA DRAW EVEN.

that au makes me think of sling with glasses for some reason… i need to draw so bad….!!!!;!2!

And they were roommates /ref+j

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sadhours · 1 year

Text

neon lights pt. 3 | b.h & reader

18+ minors dni | prev chapter contents: adult themes, gambling addiction, angst, smut

“Oh, god, yes!” you hear through the paper thin walls of your apartment as you try to fall asleep, “Billy!”

You grab your pillow and try to cover your ears but it’s no use. They’re all so loud lately it was driving you insane. Billy was being cruel, bringing home a girl five nights a week. You had intended to bring someone home too, thinking two could play at that game but there wasn’t a single candidate at any of the bars you’d gone too that night. You know it’s because you’d started comparing men to your roommate and well, you found that Billy was so incredibly good looking that every man you looked at fell short.

The worst part of it is you feel like you lost your best friend. You two were so close before but now it’s different. If you carpooled, the whole ride would be silent but half the time Billy left before you were ready, forcing you to drive yourself. He gambled even more than before, he was late on every bill this month but you couldn’t say anything about it, afraid to push him out the door. A few of the girls even slept the night and he made them breakfast with the food you bought. It was infuriating and all you wanted was for things to go back to the way they were.

“Fuck me!” you hear the girl in the next room cry out and you feel physically ill, pushing yourself up from your bed and walking up to the wall.

You slam your fist into the it repeatedly, “Shut up!”

Then, you turn on your stereo loud enough to drown them out but there’s no way you can fall asleep with the music playing either. You just lie there and stare at the ceiling until Billy bursts into your room after the tape has flipped sides.

“Turn it off,” he calls into your room, you sit up to look at him. His skin glistens with sweat, curls stuck to his forehead and his face flush.

You roll your eyes, standing up from your bed again and stride over to your stereo. You hit the off switch and then stomp over to Billy, shoving him back so you can slam the door.

“Real fucking mature,” you hear him through the cheap wood.

God, you just wanna smack him right in his dumb face. But you take a deep breath and crawl into bed. You want to cry and you feel pathetic for it. You were the one who kept saying you couldn’t do this, he was just listening to you. The tears come and you can’t control them, seeping down over your cheeks until you have another miserable sleep.

When you wake up, you’re greeted with Billy and the girl from the night before sitting on your couch with coffee and cigarettes. You just roll your eyes when he says good morning, stomping over the kitchen to make your cup of coffee. You know he works today so you’re wondering why he hasn’t already sent her on her way. You’re very grateful you’ve got the day off and you won’t have to see him for the majority of it. He says something to you but you were deep in thought, watching your coffee slowly drip into the cup. You don’t ask what he said, instead deciding that it wasn’t important. However, you notice there’s no more creamer in the fridge and you see red. Billy drinks his coffee black, therefore this bitch sitting on your couch used the rest of your creamer.

“You’re fucking joking,” you seethe, picking up the mug and chucking it in the sink, hearing the ceramic shatter but you don’t give a shit.

“That’s what I was trying to tell you,” Billy says but you stick your hand up.

“Don’t even fucking look at me, right now,” you say before stalking to your bedroom and slamming the door. Looks like you’d have to do the grocery shopping earlier than intended. You grab a pair of jeans and pull them up over your legs, reaching for a random shirt and slipping your shoes on. You reach for your Walkman, shoving it into your bag before exiting your room and out of the house without so much as a glance at the worst roommate in the world.

After you slam the door, the girl laughs, “Your roommate is a real bitch.”

Billy sighs, lighting another cigarette immediately after stomping his out in the ashtray. You usually weren’t but these past few weeks have been brutal. He was confused, he had thought this is what you wanted in the first place but then you were being so mean all the time. He figured he probably wasn’t being that great either but he started going to the casino more days than not just to be out of your hair and well, that wasn’t good for his finances. As fun as it was, Billy wasn’t a lucky guy. He still hoped he’d hit a jackpot or at least double his money but he was usually hitting cash out when he’d lost half of it.

“She’s not so bad, I think she’s just going through something,” he shrugs, looking at the tv.

“Maybe she needs to get laid,” his guest says, smoothing her over Billy’s crotch.

He chuckles, “Maybe. I gotta start getting ready for work.”

You did need to get laid and Billy thought it was unfortunate that it couldn’t be by him. He grabs the girls wrist and pulls it off of him, “Let me call you a cab.”

“Okay…” she pouts, and he walks to the phone, dialing the number he knew so well. He walks her out when the taxi arrives, but he turns his face when she goes to kiss him.

“Can I see you again?” she asks and Billy smiles awkwardly.

“I’ve got your number,” he says and waves her goodbye before going inside and hopping in the shower so he could start getting ready for his shift.

He hopes you’re back before he’s done so he an apologize for the whole creamer thing, he knew he shouldn’t have let her use the rest of it but he’d made the coffee and didn’t want to look stupid. He’d rather you look like a bitch, and he hated that. It wasn’t fair to you, and he thought he should be a little bit more considerate. He didn’t have to bring girls home every night, but they got his mind off of things and he was pretty much using them as a release- a kind of therapy.

He’s styling his hair when he hears that you’re home. He’d been frustrated with it, because he hadn’t had a haircut in so long it was just a mop of unruly curls doing whatever they wanted. He slips his boots on and opens his bedroom door, the front door wide open. He wanders out to your car and helps you carry the rest of the groceries in.

“I’m sorry,” he says when you start putting them away. “That was super uncool of me.”

“Everything you do is uncool,” you mutter under your breath, opening the cupboard to put away the boxes of rice you’d bought. Next, you pull dish soap from the bag and when you go to put it in its place on the sink. You look into it and notice Billy had cleaned up the mug you broke. That was cool of him, however he was the reason you’d broke it in the first place.

Billy groans, “Listen, we gotta talk. We have to work this out or I should move out.”

“No,” you sigh, finally bringing your eyes to meet his. “Don’t move out. I’m… I just need some space, okay? We can talk when you get home tonight.”

You glance over at the clock to see it nearing four, “You’re gonna be late.”

“I’m off at midnight, you’ll be awake when I get home?”

“Yeah,” you shrug, “I work 4-12 tomorrow too, so.”

Billy grabs his keys from the counter, nodding to you before leaving you all alone. You finish putting everything away and figure you should take a bath, calm your nerves. You pour yourself a glass of wine and start on some self care.

The club is packed for some odd reason. It’s a Thursday, these shifts are usually pretty boring for Billy. In fact, Thursday’s he usually cleans the floor drains out of pure boredom. He worries he’s not getting out of here at midnight like he’d planned but fuck, he was two hundred short on rent and the first of the month was just around the corner. Well, he wouldn’t have been two hundred short if it weren’t for his trip to the casino. He had his half of rent tucked away in his wallet and when his tip money ran out, he used his rent without a second thought. Well, the thought was that he could make it back or even more. Alas, he didn’t but Billy had a talent for survival, and he knew everything would be fine.

“Hi, is Cherry working tonight?” Billy freezes when he hears your stage name, he looks up to see a young guy staring back at him with a hopeful look in his eye.

He was no regular, your regulars already knew your schedule. This guy was different, he wore a fucking polo shirt and pressed slacks.

“I went to high school with her, heard she was dancing here and thought I’d stop by to see,” the guy says, and Billy can tell his intentions aren’t friendly.

“No one named Cherry works here,” Billy lies, easily, “Can I get you a drink?”

“Shit, she lied to me?” the guy asks and sits down at the bar, “I’ll take a Jack and Coke.”

Billy grabs a glass, filling it with ice before grabbing the neck of the Jack Daniels bottle.

“Sorry, bud,” he gives him an apologetic frown before counting the pour in his head, reaching for the soda gun and simultaneously filling the glass.

“It’s crazy, she told me this morning when I ran into her at the supermarket,” he purses his lips,

“Yeah, that sucks dude, chicks lie,” Billy says with a roll of his eyes, “Plenty of other girls dancing tonight.”

“Huh, she really doesn’t work here, ‘cause if you’d seen her you’d know these other bitches just don’t compare,” he shrugs.

“What a shame. It’s 3 for the drink,” Billy says, looking bored when he’s really just pissed off.

The guy slides a five to Billy, “I’m Chip.”

“And I don’t care,” Billy winks, grabbing the bill and walking back to the register.

“Why do you look so peeved?” Becky asks, leaning against the counter next to the register.

“Just an asshole customer,” he say’s quietly to her, pulling two dollars from the register to put it on the bar top.

“Hey, excuse me, maybe you know her. Does Cherry work here?” Chip asks and Becky sells Billy out.

“Yeah! She’s not here tonight though,” Becky smiles at him before walking back to her side of the bar.

Chip gives Billy an amused look, a smug smile on his face that Billy wants to punch. He sighs at being caught, “Look man, I have an obligation to protect these girls and I have no clue who you are.”

“Seems like you’d be hurting the business lying to dudes left and right, what if I had a fat tip for her?” Chip counters, bringing the drink to his lips.

Billy tries not to read into the insinuation, instead turning to the group of men walking up to the bar and taking their order. Chip chuckles softly before finishing his drink in two big gulps and trudging out of the club.

When Billy finally gets home it’s a little after two am and he’s surprised to walk into you blasting Foreigner on the stereo as you scrub away at the kitchen sink. He kicks his boots off by the door and walks into the kitchen. You look adorable, he thinks. Bright yellow gloves covering your hands and forearms add a pop of color to your rather simple pajamas, a simple black singlet and tiny spandex shorts. The clip in your hair doing a miserable job of keeping the strands up, loose pieces dangling around your neck.

“I’ve been waiting! For a girl like you to come into my life!” he sings exaggeratedly, raising his fist in the air, “I’ve been waiting for a girl like you and a love that will survive!”

You turn to him, an entertained expression smeared across your face and a smile breaking at your lips.

“You actually have a really nice voice,” you compliment him, impressed.

Billy snorts, patting your ass as he walks to the fridge and grabs a beer. “Ya think I can get a record deal?”

You stiffen at the gentle smack, but you know Billy’s just a touchy guy and it doesn’t necessarily mean anything. He walks over and turns the dial on the stereo, lowering the volume before walking back into the kitchen.

“Been cleaning all day? Place looks nice,” he muses.

Cleaning was something you did as a distraction, losing yourself in a good album and letting worrying thoughts fall behind. “Yeah, I got bored,” you shrug, rinsing the soap from the sink.

Billy smiles, “I saw the bottle of wine in the fridge, have a glass and sit with me. Take a break.”

That does sound nice, you think as you’re pulling the gloves off and tossing them around the faucet. “Have you eaten?” you call out, pouring a glass of moscato.

“I grabbed something on the way home,” he lets you know, sitting back on the couch and waiting for you.

When you sit, he wraps an arm around the back of the couch and coincidentally, your shoulders. He uses his other hand to pat his chest and you take the offer, leaning your back against him, holding your wine glass in your hand.

I Don’t Wanna Live Without You is the next song on your mixtape and it makes this whole thing feel so romantic. You’re not sure if you should just lean into it. Billy’s body feels warm against your back and you can feed his breath tickling your neck.

“So what do we do?” he asks, moving his hand to touch yours.

You sigh, “It’s been hard to push this stuff down.”

“Then why do it?” he wonders.

“Maybe it’s just lust,” you suggest, “Maybe all we really want is to just have sex.”

Billy laughs softly, “We could just do that then, who says we have to be together?”

You raise an eyebrow, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I don’t sleep around the way you do.”

He snorts at that, not really sure how to respond. He didn’t want to admit he’s only been so overboard with it because he gets so sexually frustrated at the sight of you. He had to get it out somehow.

“We could try it, I guess. If it doesn’t work then we just stop?” you think aloud.

“It’s just fun, we stop when it’s not fun anymore,” Billy says.

“If.”

“Huh?”

“We stop if it’s not fun anymore,” you correct him.

Billy pushes his nose against the back of your neck, you can feel him smiling against your skin. “So it’s a deal then?”

His breath against your neck makes you feel hot all over, “It’s a deal.”

Billy bites you then and you yelp, spilling your wine on the couch when you involuntarily jump.

“Shit,” he says, sitting up all the way, “I’ll get it.”

He saunters over the kitchen, grabbing a towel and bringing it back to wipe the couch. It’s definitely not how you’d clean it but you know the wine won’t stain the brown upholstery so you let it go.

“Thank you,” you say as you sit up.

Billy leaves to toss the towel in with the dirty laundry and when he gets back he says, “Oh, yeah, a guy came by the club looking for you.”

“Who?” you ask, shocked.

“Oh, god, he had such a douchey name! What was it?” he looks deep in concentration before he widens his eyes when he remembers, “Chip!”

You roll your eyes and groan, “I fucking hated that guy so much. We went to school together. I ran into him today and he asked what I was up to.”

Billy smirks, “He said he might’ve had a uh, fat tip to give you.”

“I’d rather have yours,” you say without thinking.

He laughs though and collapses back on the couch with you, pulling you onto his lap. It’s so easy being there, perhaps because you sat in men’s laps for a living. Still, it was rare a man like Billy would walk into the club. He wraps his arms around your waist and starts kissing at your shoulder. Your initial reaction is to recoil, the walls you’d spent forever building up hadn’t cracked yet. He must feel you tense up because he whispers into your ear, “Hey, relax. Let me make you feel good.”

His deep voice melts you, but his hands cupping your breasts over your thin tank top force you to drop your mouth open. Your body lights up with anticipation, you’d actually be sober enough to remember this. To see what all the fuss was about, why all those women were so loud in his bed. You tilt your head back, eyes looking up at Billy and he meets you with an intense gaze. His eyes are dark with lust and you wonder if he’d been desiring this as much as you have. He grazes his thumbs against your peeked nipples, biting his lip as he intently watches your face. You whine out his name and his lips turn up into a satisfied smile. Funny thing is, he’s not doing anything you’ve never experienced yet it feels like first time you’re being touched like this.

“Talk to me,” you demand softly, eyes fluttering shut as his hands move lower and rest on your stomach.

Billy laughs at that, tucking his fingers into hue waistband, “So you like dirty talk, eh?”

You blush as you admit, “I like your voice.”

It was one of the first indicators that you were attracted to him, when you’d hear his voice your entire body would ignite in arousal. Billy kisses against your temple, hands inching dangerously close to your aching core. He still isn’t talking, though so you look back up at him and see his face deep in concentration.

“What are—“

“I’m thinking!” he exclaims defensively, nudging your head with his chin.

A giggle erupts from you, “You can literally say anything. Your voice makes me so wet.”

You hear him groan softly, your self confidence raging from the confirmation that you turn him on too. “That works,” you pant, arching your back to try to wiggle his hand lower.

Billy licks against the shell of your ear and then bites the lobe, you feel it in your thighs as you moan out. He whispers against your ear, “You’re so fucking hot.”

Finally, you feel his fingers slide through your drenched folds and you bring your knees up and spread your legs further.

“Fuck— you’re soaking,” he continues and you’re head feels so fuzzy, the timbre of his voice only making his statement even truer.

“Mhm,” you moan out, “all because of you.” Your voice sounds foreign on your ears, higher pitched from the magic he’s doing on you.

“Yeah?” he breathes, sliding two fingers to your entrance and grazing the hole in circles.

You choke out another moan, much louder than the other ones and you get it. Those girls in his bedroom couldn’t keep quiet. It was impossible. His thick fingers were too damn perfect.

“Billy,” you pant, feeling his arousal present against your back.

He brings his fingers back up to your clit, scissoring the tender bud as he presses a sloppy kiss to your neck, his tongue feels so hot and certain against the skin. Your writhing against him, small moans and pants uncontrollably falling from your lips. His ministrations pick up an unbearably skilled rhythm, fast and then slow. It’s all so brutal.

“Take your fucking shorts off,” he demands as his free hand pulls your tank top up just above your breasts. You stand up to do so then turn to him.

“Yours too. Off,” you demand.

You wouldn’t dare tear your eyes away, watching as Billy kicks his boots off before hurriedly unbuttoning his pants and pushing them to his ankles along with his boxers. His cock springs out, slapping against his stomach and you groan at the sight of his red, leaking tip. You sit beside him this time, bringing your knees up to spread yourself for him. You lick your palm and reach down to wrap your fingers around the base of his cock, squeezing slightly as you turn to look at his face. He’s biting his lip, staring into you with those gorgeous blues. He then reaches down to rub your pussy again, groaning again at just how wet you are. You gasp out when he slides two digits inside, his actions a little more rough this time. You stroke him slowly, rubbing along his tip with your thumb every time you go up. He lets out a low moan. You turn your eyes forward and that’s when you catch it, you can see the reflection of you two on the empty TV screen. It excites you even more and your hips jerk forward.

“Billy,” you nod towards it, glancing to him to make sure he sees it too.

He laughs softly, spreading his fingers inside you and then pulls them out. He brings his palm up and slaps your pussy, clearly putting on a show for himself. And for yourself, you cry out at the strike, feeling as you clench around nothing. You squeeze his cock again, looking back to his face and smiling wide.

Billy moves to kiss you then, pulling his hands away and grabbing your wrist to pull yours away. He’s pinning you back on the couch and moving between your legs, deepening the kiss, grabbing onto your face as he does so.

You moan against his bruising lips, arms trapped beneath his strong body. His grip on your jaw is tight, his other hand grabbing a fistful of your hair and pulling while he hastily licks into your mouth. You wiggle beneath him, desperate for him. Billy’s pulls back and grabs your wrists, pinning them above your head with one hand. He leans back down and licks up your neck to your ear.

“Do not move your hands,” he demands, voice low and breath intoxicating against your ear. “Do I make myself clear?”

You whimper, “Yes, sir.”

Billy pats the side of your thigh, “Good girl.”

You ache all over in anticipation, so eagerly ready for whatever he wants to do to you. Another gasp falls from you as he licks the curve of your cleavage and his tongue descends down your stomach but entirely skips where you desire it most. You instinctively bring your hands to his hair when he presses his tongue to your inner thigh. You quickly realize your mistake and pull your hands away and bring them back over your head. But Billy won’t let you get away with it, he sits up and looks down at you.

“What did I tell you?” he asks, “Tsk tsk.” He shakes his head and wraps his fingers around your wrists.

“M’sorry,” you mumble as you squirm underneath him.

“Do I need to tie you up?” he asks, his other hand wrapping loosely around your throat and you’re speechless, gazing back at him with wide eyes and mouth agape. You can’t say you’re surprised Billy’s into this stuff but you are surprised by just how much you are.

“Is that a yes?” he tightens his fingers and you shake your head.

“I’ll be good,” you pant out breathlessly.

He leans his face down to yours, kissing you almost too chaste for the sinister way he’s behaving. He pulls back to continue teasing your thighs with broad strokes of his tongue. It’s starting to become overwhelming, you know you’re dripping down your thighs and you feel him licking it up slowly. You need his mouth on your pussy this instant, you need some kind of relief or you fear you might start crying due to frustration.

“Please,” you beg, “I need… I—“

Billy licks around your core, so close yet not quite there. He places a kiss on your hip and looks up at you, “What do you need?”

“You!” you whine.

Billy laughs, low and devious, “I’m right here.”

You whine again, squirming underneath him and digging your fingernails into your palms.

“Tell me what you need, kitten.”

His tongue smooths against your hip and you moan out, rocking up at him.

“I need your mouth on my pussy,” you plead, feeling your cheeks heat up as he makes you say it out loud. “Please…”

“Good job, dollface,” Billy grins up at you, smoothing his hand over your stomach.

“Please,” you beg some more, hoping it’ll make him move faster.

He hums before trailing kisses back down to your core, spreading you with his fingers as he licks a broad stroke from your hole to your clit. You swear you see fireworks behind your eyelids, letting out a breathless moan and arching slightly.

“Billy, yes,” you whimper out.

He’s fervent between your legs, almost like he’s been desperate to do it and doesn’t know when he’ll get to do it again. To be honest, you’d didn’t expect he was the type of guy to enjoy going down but you’re happily mistaken, feeling the pressure inside you pulled taut when he sucks on your clit.

“Ah—“ you moan out, the sound getting caught in your throat as Billy licks into your hole, his hands holding your thighs in place when he feels them begin to shake.

He looks up at you, “You gonna cum for me?” after he asks, he licks broadly through your folds and then begins lapping at your clit.

You pant out, “Yes, I’m…” then it crashes over you, hands diving into his curls and pushing his mouth against you as you ride his face. You cry out his name over and over, tears threatening to spill when he continues after you’ve climaxed, your hands pulling at his hair and you jolt up. He licks you clean until you’re whimpering and overstimulated.

Then his mouth is on yours, tongue pushing past your lips and you can taste yourself, you can feel how wet it is around his mouth, down to his chin. When he pulls back, his lips tug up and expose his teeth in a euphoric smile.

“Dear god,” you tell him, your breath coming out short, “I’ve never cum that hard in my entire fucking life.”

Billy laughs softly and you push his curls off his forehead, admiring his face hovering over you. His erection is apparent against your stomach, but he’s caressing your face and kissing your lips gently.

“Let’s go to my room,” you nudge his nose with yours.

Billy hums, kissing you again before pulling himself up to his feet and tugging you up with him. Your legs feel like jello and you wobble as you stand, so Billy lifts you up and you wrap your legs around his waist. He carries you into your bedroom, flicking the light on before laying you down and settling beside you. You turn to him as he turns to you, staring into your eyes. You hook your leg over his waist and reach for his cock, guiding his tip through your folds before lining it up with your entrance. Billy bites his lip, pushing his hips up and you feel a few inches of him enter you. Your breath hitches up and your eyes fall shut, the girth of him a little intense at first.

He smooths his hand up the underside of your thigh, fingers feeling himself connected inside of you and he groans softly. You’re desperate to hear more noises from him, pushing him onto his back and straddling him. You lower yourself so he’s completely inside you, moaning hoarsely at the sensation. He makes a noise a little more higher pitched than you’re used to and it makes your head swim, palms pressing onto his chest as you start grinding against him, his fingers grip your hips.

“So fucking good,” he grits his teeth, tilting his head back slightly.

Your jaw falls open when he hits your g-spot with a particular swoop of your hips, fingernails digging in his chest as you try to recreate it over and over.

“You’re so fucking big,” you whine out, grabbing his hands and lacing your fingers. You press his hands into the sheets, above his head as you bounce up and down on his cock.

Billy licks his lips, “You take it so well.”

His voice drenched in pleasure surges more wetness from you and he groans low and husky. His eyes are scanning all over your body and face, enamored with all of it.

“Billy,” you pant out, “Oh, fuck, Billy…”

You let go of your hands and straighten your back, cupping your breasts and squeezing them as you ground down on him.

His hands are back on your hips, holding you still as he drills into you, his hips snapping up in reckless force. He hits your spot each time, causing you to arch your back and your hand to drop down to run quick circles against your clit. You can hear your skin slapping together and the little grunts and groans coming from him.

“Shit,” you curse, “I’m gonna fucking cum again!”

Billy grins up at you, “Thatta girl. Cum all over my cock, cum for me, princess.”

The praise does it, your body convulsing above him as you ride out your orgasm, dripping down his cock while you scream his name out.

He doesn’t give you any time to come down, flipping the two of you and pushing your knees up, hands on the backs of your thighs as he pounds into you from above. That’s got you screaming, hands grabbing onto any part of him you can.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he groans, pulling out and moving to the side of you. You turn over and wrap your lips around his cock, moaning as he empties into your mouth. You suck, wanting every last drop you can get from this man. He’s a whining mess before you and dear god, you’re already ready for more.

Never in your life though, have you tasted cum so delicious. It’s not at all bitter and you’re confused but even more so, incredibly infatuated. You think either he’s meticulous about his diet or you’ve met your soulmate. And you’ve seen what Billy consumes, his cum should taste disgusting.

You’re lying on your backs, panting and holding hands with the laziest and happiest smiles.

“Is that what you thought it’d be like?” you ask.

Billy’s tone is perplexed, “We’ve had sex before.”

You turn to him, “I don’t remember it. Do you?”

He scrunches his face up, out of hurt or realization, you’re not sure. But then he says, “I guess not. Like bits and pieces.”

You’re curious now, “What do you remember?”

Billy’s face flushes, “I honestly think we were too drunk to even finish.”

You grin, “Aw, good ol’ whiskey dick.”

He cocks an eyebrow, “Whiskey clit? You couldn’t cum either.”

“Whiskey clit is definitely a thing. Probably more frustrating than whiskey dick,” you counter, cuddling up to his chest and looking at him. “What else though?”

Billy looks like he’s thinking hard, “I ate you out, I think… I’m pretty sure you were slapping my face?”

You hum, “Sounds like me.”

He laughs, “Well you didn’t slap me once just now.”

“That’s cause you were the boss this round, just wait an hour or two,” you tease him, pulling him into a kiss.

“You’re gonna be too exhausted to go to work tomorrow,” Billy says playfully and you hum happily.

“You too.”

“My job is much easier than yours,” he admits and you like that he thinks so. The physical aspect of your job wasn’t the hard part, it was the mental gymnastics. Having to turn the charm on for men who didn’t even see you as a person, pretending you were the perfect fantasy. And now the added bonus of Billy watching. That’s why you knew deep down, this whole thing was gonna go up in flames. This never worked out. Boyfriends didn’t work. And that wasn’t even considering boyfriends who worked with you. Boyfriends who had to pour drinks bought for their girlfriend by men eager to see her tits. Maybe Billy was different. You worried still.

“And higher paying for a reason,” you reply and he mocks offense.

“You bet your ass if they had a ladies night, I’d be on that stage in a heartbeat,” he assures you, rubbing his hand over your bare ass.

“I’d throw all my money at you, too,” you smile.

Billy chuckles, “And I’d use it to pay our rent.”

“Ooh, meta sugar daddy?”

He laughs hard at that and you feel proud, loving when you could make a man laugh. It felt even better making him laugh.

“Are you ready to go again?” you ask which makes him laugh once more.

“Thought you said an hour or two?”

“Yeah, but your laugh made me horny again,” you admit.

Billy pushes out a breath, “We could try. My dick twitched at you saying horny.”

You grin and sit up, pushing his hair of his forehead and looking at him. “Oh, god, Billy… you make me so horny. I’m just so fucking wet anytime I see you.”

“Or hear me,” he teases and you glance down to see his dick filling out again.

“Would you look at that?” you point out with a humble smile.

“Keep saying naughty stuff,” he pleads, fingertips caressing your cheek.

You giggle, bringing your lips to his ear to whisper, “You make me so hot, you’re the sexiest man I’ve ever seen. Whenever I see you, all I want is for you to bend me over and take me. Wherever we are, whoever is around, I don’t care. I need your cock filling me up all the time, I’m so fucking desperate for it.”

“Alright,” Billy groans, pushing you onto your back and spreading your thighs against the sheets. He hovers over you, slapping his cock against your pussy and biting his lip as he watches.

“Need it,” you beg, wiggling under him, “Please, Billy.”

He slides inside you and you wrap your arms around his neck, moaning out at the feeling of being full again. You hook your legs around his waist and pull him flush against you. He grunts softly, rolling his hips excruciatingly slow. It’s nice and lazy, he kisses you and matches his rhythm, licking into your mouth every time he moves his hips back into yours.

“Mmm, you feel so amazing,” you muse, “Want you to be inside me all the time. Never wanna stop feeling this.”

Billy sucks in a breath, moving his hands to cradle your jaw as he peers into your eyes, the gaze intoxicatingly idolatrous. You feel panic creeping up but his loving smile diminishes it quickly. You gasp, moving your hand to his cheek and he drills into you particularly deep. Your moaning is breathy and high in tone, completely out of your control as he continues to pull them from you.

“Wanna make you feel this good all the time,” he purrs and it gives you the chills, your body trembling.

“Billy,” you whimper, eyes fluttering shut when he speeds his movements up. The sensation in the pit of your stomach letting you know that you’re there again. You pull him closer, softly chanting his name as he pulls the third orgasm from you and he’s soon after you, pulling out to shoot onto your stomach. You sigh, body going limp as he pulls away. You manage to look down at his cum on your stomach and you’re stunned by how much it is. You think, God damn, this dude must be so fertile, as you wipe it up with your fingers and bring it to your mouth, loving the taste of him.

Billy leans down to kiss your forehead and then lays down beside you, pulling you to him and kissing your neck and shoulder.

You feel so elated, you feel so cared for and so in love. You know it’s not good but you can’t stop it, you cling to him and don’t let go for the rest of the night.

#billy hargrove x you #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x female reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove angst #billy hargrove smut

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