#i dont think i even knew the ship name until after i read that fic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moneymasnn · 2 years

Text

Our Chaotic little family| Charles Leclerc

Notes: This is around 4.5k words and ive not proof read it so im sorry in advance for that aha, also I dont speak French so im sorry if either anything is incorrect or the fact he his French and this is an English fic. But I hope you guys enjoy some protective dad!Charles xoxoxo

Blurb: One where you daughter gets a boyfriend, and Charles is not happy about it at all.

Warnings: Swearing, some small angst with angry Charles.

You and Charles had known each other since before you could remember, he had always been the boy next door that you had a huge crush on. After he set off on his formula 1 career you didn't see that much of him, thinking the ship had sailed, but somehow fate made it happen. You had been lucky enough to get to love each other when you were only young, Charles was 20, you were 19.

You both experienced the bittersweetness of young love, until eventually he was the man you wanted to spend every waking moment with, you were never sure if you wanted to ever get married or even have children for that matter, but with him it was different.

And here you were, you were married and had three children, and you couldn't ever think you could be more happy.

Your oldest, Leo, was now seventeen, his dad takes him out at least three times a week teaching him to drive. You hadn't had the confidence to let Leo drive you around yet, but you knew with Charles he would learn quickly, you knew because Charles was the first person to teach you to drive a car too.

Your third and youngest was little baby arthur, who earned his name after giving you the most chaotic pregnancy of them all. He was only seven years old, he had gotten a lot more better behaved with age but was still your little menace. Charles used to say that he would be a footballer when he was older considering how much he liked to kick your stomach. He was born three weeks early at the Monaco Grand prix. A story for another day, but even before Arthur was born he was a handful pregnancy so that's how it was an easy decision to name him after Charles' youngest brother, who was also a chaotic handful.

Your only little girl, Juliana or jules was fifteen turning twenty one. she was starting to experience the world of womanhood. She wasn't as much her daddys little girl as she got older, something Charles had grown to hate.

Jules was your best friend, you wanted her to have the comfort of knowing her mum was there for her throughout her whole life, something you never had growing up. She had recently told you about a boy she had grown to like, you knew she had been hiding something from you, so did charles. You knew she would tell you about this boy soon, Charles however was praying that her happy mood had nothing to do with the male species.

You were standing in the kitchen, baking some cookies for a birthday party for one pierres children and Arthur junior was helping you, and by helping he was just eating all the chocolate chips. It was a late sunny friday afternoon, the type of restful afternoon where Charles wasnt off racing that weekend, the kind of fridays you liked to hold on too.

Charles was talking Leo out for an afternoon drive and Jules was sitting on the sofa giggling at her phone like the giddy little love struck child she was.

Leo was scrambling around the house to find his lucky driving shoes and Charles came up behind you in the kitchen, wrapping his hands around your waist and leaning forward to kiss your temples. He looked up to see what you were looking at, but his brows furrowed when he was his little girl twirling her hair and giggling at her phone.

“What on earth could she be laughing at her phone like that for?” He said.

You rolled your eyes at your husband's words, spinning around and placing your hands on his chest. His eyes still glued on his daughter.

“Her friends probably sent her a funny video.” You tried to shrug it off, but Charles wasn't dropping it.

“Mon amour, I know that look.” He looked at you, shooting you a knowing look.

A smirk crawled on ur lips as you turned back around to watch your daughter who was now sprawled out on the sofa on her stomach, twirling her hair, biting her lip with her feet swinging in the air.

“What look?”

“You're her carbon copy, y/n. I know that look a little to well.” He glances at you with a knowing expression.

“Dad! I'm ready!” Leo's voice echoed around the kitchen causing Charles to kiss your lips quickly and whisper a goodbye.

“Papa! Gross!” Arthur shouted from where he was perched on the kitchen counter, an empty bag of chocolate chips in hands and the rest all around his mouth.

“I'll go to the shop for you on the way back or your chocolate chip cookies aren't going to be very chocolatey.” Charles said to you looking back at his son in gramance who was touching every surface in the kitchen with his chocolate covered fingers.

After Charles left you gave Arthur a bath, watching as he climbed in the bubbled filled tub with all his toys.

“Mama, is papa your boyfriend?” He asked you, just as you were about to exit the bathroom.

“No sweetheart-” you giggled at your son's randomness, “he's my husband, we got married long before you were born.” You perch down by the bath, dipping your fingers in the bath, splashing him slightly making him giggle.

“What makes you ask that?”

“Julie has a boyfriend.” he said, blowing some of the bubbles from the bath.

“How do you know that?” You knew it was wrong to get Arthur to tell you all the gossip, but he was a great little ear wiger.

It wouldn't be the first time he had told you and Charles a story that he had accidentally overheard. Like when Pierre and his wife first found out they were expecting another baby Arthur had accidentally overheard a private conversation about Pierre's wife not being able to drink alcohol, after that you and Charles added up the dots.

“She was saying she has a boyfriend on the phone, I heard Julie saying papa would be mad.”

You took a moment, so it was true, your daughter did have a boyfriend…

After getting Arthur out of the bath you decided to let him play with his toys in his room while you went to speak to your daughter, who still hadn't moved from her position on the couch. You decided to sit next to her and pry some information out of her before Charles got home.

“Soooo.” you said, pursing your lips, sitting across from her. She didn't even make the effort to look up at you, just a simple hum.

“Julianna.” you said sternly, that caught her attention as he raised her eyesight slightly.

“Yes, mother.” She sarcastically said, rolling her eyes at your use of her full name.

“Okay, if you want to be like that.” You said with a smirk, leaning over and switching off the phone and pushing it down onto the sofa.

“I just want to talk, you've seemed a bit… occupied at the moment.”

“I'm sorry I have friends.” she sarcastically said as she sat up, crossing her arms of her chest with a frown.

“Not only friends, I've been told you have a more than a friend.” You cringed as you said it, you were bad at this.

“That little shit! Authur told you he didn't.” she said, shocked.

“Language, missy! It doesn't matter who told me, but I want to know what's going on in your life, you can trust me.” You smiled, uncrossing her arms and talking her hand in yours.

“There's a boy…” she mumbled.

“Tell me, mon cheri.”

“He's not my boyfriend though.” You noticed the hit of sadness in her eyes as she looked down.

“It's silly, i know your going to tell me i'm too young-”

“I don't think you're silly, mon amour.” You said, pulling your arms open so she can rest her head on your shoulder.

“In fact, I probably understand more than anyone else.” you kissed the spot behind her ear, tucking her hair back as you could tell she wanted to listen to what had to say.

“You know, I was about, maybe fourteen when I fell in love with your father.”

She raised her head to look up at you, “Really?”

You nodded your head with a small smile at the time, “I don't think I knew at the time, but I always had a crush on the boy next door for as long as i could remember.”

“It took your father a little longer than me to realise he liked me back, he came and gate crashed my first proper date.”

“What?” She said with a smile as she begged you to tell her the story.

“Your father was such a romantic, he walked into the restaurant right as the mains came out and said there was a family emergency and he needed to take me home. Then we got in his car and I was all panicked wondering what the family emergency was and he just kissed me.” You couldn't stop the smile that formed on your lips as you told the story. It was all true, Charles had gate crashed your first proper date, and ever since you had both been inseparable.

“That's really sweet mum.”

“The point is, these things take time, especially love. I don't doubt your feelings for this boy if you say you have them, and if he feels the same he will show you sooner or later.” You smile at her, holding her closer.

“I really like him, mum.”

You were about to reply when Leo and Charles both stumbled through the door. You kissed Julianna on the head and stood up to see your husband smiling with slightly flushed cheeks and a bag of chocolate chips in his hands.

“How did your driving lesson go baby? You asked Leo, ruffling his long brown hair, the exact same way his father has it.

He just shot you a sheepish smile, shrugging his shoulders and he looked over to his father who smiled slightly.

“Hes- hes learning, that's all that matters.” Charles said as he looked at Leo with a smile.

When Leo walked off to his room Charles followed you into the kitchen, placing the chocolate on the side.

You waited for Leo to be out of ear shot before Charles burst out with giggles in the kitchen.

“Was it that bad?” You smiled as Charles placed his head on your shoulder.

“Mon dieu, i'm just happy to get home in one piece.” he laughed as he brought you into a hug.

You watched as Charles noticed Jules was still on her phone, but he didnt question it this time, he decided he was going to have a shower and get into bed.

After you had made the cookies for tomorrow you decided it was time for bed too, you decided to check on the kids before you did, leo was playing on his xbox and you could hear julie was on the phone in her room so you left her alone. You could hear faint giggles from your room so you knew you didn't need to check on Arthur since he and Charles were curled up in bed watching a movie.

You smiled as you jumped in the shower, leaving the boys to watch their movie and by the time you were done Arthur was fast asleep on charles.

Charles looked up at you with a cheeky smile.

“He's excited for tomorrow, I told him Pierre got a bouncy castle for the party.”

You leaned over and gave your husband a long kiss on the lips.

“What was that for?” he smirked.

You shrugged before you got under the covers, pulling your book from your bedside table and putting on your glasses.

Charles watched as you put the goddamn glasses on that he loved so much.

That's when he got out of bed, pulling Arthur up with him, probably to put him to bed.

“I will be right back.” Charles whispered with a wink.

“I'll be waiting.”

The next day it seemed like a struggle to get everyone up and out the house. Arthur was ready first with Charles as they were both sitting on the sofa watching the tv. Jules had gotten changed about seven times and Leo was upset that he couldn't drive the whole family to uncle perrie's house. Charles just replied to his son with an honest answer that we all did want to make it to the party in one piece. And on the down side you hadn't felt the best all morning.

After putting on a small yellow summer dress you were ready to step out into the Monaco sun.

Pierre had three children also, Noah who was around Leo's age, the pair got on really well, they reminded you of Pierre and Charles when they were younger, Noah even had pierres charm and witty humour. And then there was arlo who was six, with only a few months age difference between him and arthur the pair got on really well, and pierres new baby layla, who was turning one today.

After finally managing to get everyone in the car and to Pierre's house you could relax slightly more. Pierre and Charles stood in the garden by the bbq with beer in each hand while you sat on a chair lounger with a smile on your face as you held the birthday girl layla.

You were reminiscing when Arthur was this small, when his whole hand would fit into your palm, but your smile never faded when you looked to see Charles smiling over at you. You held up Layla's hand and waved at him, and he waved back, his heart fluttering seeing you with another baby.

“Please don't tell me you have baby fever? Thinking about popping out another one.” Pierre nudged charles.

“What, no.” Charles blushed.

“So, you're all done then?”

“I don't know, we've never spoken about having more.”

“Well judging by the smile on her face, she's already thought about it.”

When charles turned back around to look at you he noticed you making your way from the garden to indoors, you had mentioned all morning that you haven't felt well, he could only assume you was going to be sick, judging by the look on your face he handed pierre his beer and ran down to the bottom of the garden to the patio doors to pierres garden.

When he walked through the doors he bumped straight into your back.

“Mon amour, are you feeling okay?”

But you never answered Charles' question, instead you stood with your mouth wide open looking over to the sofas in the corner of the room.

After seeing your attention was else where charles turned around to see what you were looking at, but his face flushed red when he was his precious little girl and pierres stupid son with his tounge down her throat.

“Oh no!” Charles shouted, his hand falling from your shoulder as he pointed at the two teenagers that had just been caught.

“No fucking way in hell, get your hands of my daughter gasly!” Charles shouted as the two teenagers scrambled to make as far distance between them both as possible.

“Noah is the boy you told me about?” Your mouth had been agape the whole time, you were not expecting that.

“You knew?!” Charles turned to you, his face still flsuhed as there was steam practically coming out of his ears.

“Well i- I didn't know it was Noah she was talking about.” You shouted back at charles.

“You told your mum about me?” Noah smirked at Jules as she blushed a deep shade of red and put her head down.

“Mum, dad you're really embarrassing me.” she said through gritted teeth and wide eyes.

“Don't look at her like that gasly or I swear to god I'm going to-” But as Charles went to make his way over to the young boy who was standing still behind the sofa. Pierre had come in after hearing all the competition from outside, placing his hands on Charles' chest as he pushed him back before Charles could finish his sentence.

“Why are you shouting?” Pierre said to his friend, “What's going on?” he asked as he turned to you.

“What is going on? Good question pierre, what the fuck is going on, both of you!” Charles pointed to the two guilty teenages in the corner, that's when Pierre turned around and had figured out what was happening.

Pierre was trying to stifle his giggles as he looked at his son, his best friend's daughter and back to his best friend.

“No way! This is great, Jules is a great girl Noah, I'm happy for you!” Pierre exclaimed and turned to smile at you, you just nodded at the man with a smile. At least one of them was happy.

“What? No!” Charles looked back at Pierre who had a very contrasting reaction to him.

“He is not good enough for my daughter, no one is, Julianna get in the car, we're going home!”

“Charles.” you called, but he didn't hear you.

He was shouting and you had a massive headache, and also so much was happening all you could tell was he was acting very irrational right now.

“What do you mean not good enough for your daughter?” Pierre asked, offended as he stepped to charles.

“You know exactly what I mean. I know what you were like as a teenager, remember?”

“Charles-” you tried to interrupt.

“No y/n, i'm right. He's just like you, see that little smirk on his smug face, I know what he wants and he's not getting it from my daughter!”

“Dad!” Jules shouted from across the room as hers and Noah's face turned red.

“How dare you say that about my son!”

“I'm not wrong Pierre, you used to get through the girls when we were younger, I doubt he's no different!”

“Charles!'' You shouted his name one more time, however this time you caught the attention of Pierre who looked over charles shoulder to see you looking rather green with a hand over your mouth.

All of pierres attention suddenly turned to you as he cocked his head to the side and his eyes widened.

“Charles, I think she's going to throw up.” And with that Charles realised the reason he had abandoned his stop at the bbq to follow you in her anyway.

“Shit, mon amour, are you okay?”

You didn't reply, just shaking your head as you held your hand over your mouth and ran to the toilet.

Charles had gone to follow you to the toilet but then he noticed a hand around his daughters waist and his attention changed.

“HANDS OFF GASLY!”

And with that Noah's hands were in the air as Jules pulled him off of her, tears welled up in her eyes as she looked at her dad.

“I'm not your little girl anymore dad!” she shouted before running back outside.

Charles groaned as he ran to where he could hear you being sick in the toilet, he grabbed your hair and rubbed your back.

“Mon amour, what's going on?” he asked as he handed you some tissues to wipe your mouth.

“Charles, I need to tell you something.”

“I'm listening.”

“We're going to need a bigger car.”

Charles' expression dropped as his slight smile faded.

“Don't worry about that right now, you sick, okay? Once we get you home I'll buy you all the bigger cars in the world.” He smiled but you could see he thought you were delusional as he looked you head in his hands and kissed your forehead.

“No charles, we need a bigger car for an extra person.” you giggled.

“If this is about Noah, he's not coming home with us?” Charles shaked his head as he looked at you.

You laughed again at how clueless he looked, you took his hands in yours, “we need another car seat too.”

“We got Arthur a new one last month- Mon amour? Are you feeling okay?” Charles was getting a bit nervous now, you were making no sense to him.

You look at his hand that was in yours and placed it on your stomach.

“Charles, I'm pregnant.” you smiled at him as you whipped the dribble from your chin.

“Surprise.” you smiled, lazily waving jazz hands as you dropped against the wall of the toilet, your head hurting even more after throwing up.

“Are you sure?” Charles' eyes lit up as he leaned over closer, his hand still on your stomach.

You nodded as you looked down at his hand and placed yours on top.

“Another one?” Charles let out a laugh as tears welled up in his eyes.

You both laughed as he moved so he was next to you crouched against the wall and you placed your head on his shoulder.

“How long have you known?” he asked you, kissing your temple as he tried to stop the tears.

“I've known for a few days, since when we went for that meal with Carlos and Isa and I was sick.”

“I thought that was food poisoning?” Charles laughed.

“Yeah, apparently not. Insted we have a sixth member to add to our not so little family.” You giggled.

After what felt like a few moments in silence with Charles as he held your stomach, continually kissing your temple and head you spoke up, nursing your little bubble on the toilet floor of Pierre's house.

“Charles, you need to apologise to Pierre, Noah, and jules.”

Charles groaned as he threw his head back, “let me just stay in here with you for a minute.” he complained.

“Do I really have to apologise?” he asked you with a pout.

“Yes.”

Charles helped you to stand up as you both made your way out the bathroom, Charles could sense the angry looks from everyone at the party as he could see his daughter crying into her uncle carlos’ arms as he gave Charles a death stare.

“Go apologise to her.” you ushered him on, he gave your waist a small squeeze as he kissed your temple and looked in a deep breath.

“Will you be okay?”

“Charles, go.”

When Charles made his way over to Carlos who had his arms wrapped around julianna as she sobbed into his arms you sat down on the outdoor sofa. Rubbing your head as you sunk back into the pillows, you prayed this pregnancy would be an easy one, and hopefully your last.

Until there was a little cough that caught your attention.

It was little Noah with a glass of water in his hands and a very nervous smile as he ushered the glass towards you.

“Thank you, noah.” You smile as you take the glass from him.

“Could I please sit, y/n?”

“Of course you can sweetie.”

You liked Noah, you could understand where Charles was coming from, Pierre was a very typical teenage boy growing up, but you knew from Noah's parents that he had been brought with the morals to treat girls properly.

“Are you feeling okay?” The young boy asked you.

“I'm fine, dont worry about me, are you okay?” you asked him, rubbing his shoulder as you could see how tense he was.

“I'm really sorry, I didn't want to get jules in trouble.” you giggled slightly at the boy.

“No ones in trouble noah, just confused.”

“Charles- he can be scary when he's angry.”

You laughed again as you looked at the boy, “don't be scared of charles, he wouldn't hurt a fly. He's just protective of his little girl.”

There was a silence that loomed for a second as you both watched Julianna and Charles hug in the garden, a sign that they had made up.

“I really really like your daughter.” You turn and smile at Noah, the smell of young love radiating from him.

“I don't doubt your feelings, noah. But I am worried you both might be a bit young and naive. I know you don't want to hear that right now, but just be careful. We don't choose who we love, but we can choose who we hurt.”

And with that you engulfed Noah in a hug as he whispered to you a small thank you.

“First my daughter and now my wife, maybe I should take it all back.” You looked up to see your husband with a sheepish look on his face as Noah flushed red.

“Dad!” Jules shouted as she hit his chest causing him to moan a small sorry.

After that Noah sat up, shaking hands with charles.

“I'm here to be civil noah, you seem like a sensible young man, don't prove me wrong.” Charles nodded at Noah who replied with a ‘yes sir’ causing you to giggle.

“And if i see your hands on her again don't doubt that i won't-”

“Dad!” Jules repeated, “you said you wouldn't threaten him!”

Charles finally let go of Noah's hand, eyeing up the boy as he and Julianna walked off. He came and sat next to you on the outside deck, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as he kissed ur temple and quickly rubbed his hand over your stomach when no one was looking.

“Let's hope this one decides she doesn't want to get married until she's at least forty, or even speak to boys.” You giggled as charles moves his head closer to your stomach.

“You hear me, no boys!”

“How do you know it's a girl?”

“Oh it's a girl, I can smell the trouble from here.”

You laughed as you leaned into his shoulder.

“Did you make up?”

“We did.”

“They grow up so fast, y/n.” Charles sighed as he watched Leo think he was being discreet with his uncle Max as Max was letting him have a few sips of his beer, Arthur was jumping on the bouncy castle like he had been all day and Julianna was laughing with Noah in the corner.

“Well, we still have one more to enjoy, and athurs always going to be a momma's boy.” You shrugged as Charles turned to you.

“No way he's a daddy's boy.”

You laughed at Charles when you realised he was being serious.

“Oh no way, Arthur definitely loves me more.”

“At this moment in time Leo is my favourite.”

“Charles, you can't call favourites!”

“I can, and mine is leo.” charles smirked

You laughed as you snuggled up to your husband more, happy and content with your little chaotic family.

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc fic #Charles leclerc imagine #Charles leclerc fluff #Charles leclerc x reader #f1 #f1 fandom #f1 x you #f1 fic #f1 drivers #dad!charles #dad!charles leclerc #Ferrari #carlos sainz

2K notes · View notes

phoenixfangs · 1 year

Note

>:3c fandom askies for aa, depending on your Mood

Salty: 1, 8, 10, 25

Neutral: 16

Posi: 17, 18

JAJAJAJAJAJAJA pepper coming in clutch as always, and u KNOW im gonna do all of them, mood be damned. going under a readmore because i rambled!!

the character everyone gets wrong

maybe its a boring answer but phoenix. good god do people just Not understand him. i think the fact weve seen him in so many forms (feenie, trilogy, 7yg, aa5/6) makes it hard for people to get a pin on him, but thats the thing: u cant really get a pin on someone like that. too often i see stuff where, well into his thirties and having gotten his badge back, people portray him as just as outwardly emotional (and sometimes emotionally volatile...) as he was when he was dating dahlia, and Thats Simply Not The Case, especially after how guarded and jaded he became during aa4. hes SUCH a complicated character i cant even go into specifics and try to give other examples, because they each require paragraphs of their own explaining context and nuance in what goes through his head. i dont know how else to go on, just know that i am the only person who is correct about phoenix wright, and if anyone requires consultations for fic or art, my fee is steep but fair

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

all of them. no im kidding, uhhhhh hm. i guess that klavier and apollo Immediately knew they liked each other/were attracted to each other and spent any time pining for the others affection during aa4. i like klapollo as a ship, i just dont think klav teasing apollo with flirtation when they first meet means he was Seriously Flirting with apollo, i think its possible there was a base physical attraction but he was mostly just trying to get apollos goat for fun since he was a rookie attorney. and because of that, what reason does apollo have to be drawn to klavier? apollo isnt some stock tsundere, i think he probably was really annoyed by klavier and Didnt Like Him All That Much at first. plus, with aa4s story being what it is, i just dont think any romantic feelings are on either of their minds until well after the last case. with their ship, i like to imagine they start as professional adversaries (not rivals in the sense phoenix and miles are rivals, its a different vibe), then become friends, THEN graduate to exploring other feelings

10. worst part of fanon

all of it. no im kidding, the worst part of fanon is how rigidly people expect u to obey it. if u dont portray miles as a gay trans man, people look at u weird, for example. which isnt to say that its Bad to follow that fanon, obviously i also think hes gay (i dont personally headcanon him as trans though) but just that it is fanon. until we get concrete proof in a game or anime or what have u of miles demonstrating or naming his sexuality/gender expression, it is just as perfectly valid to portray him as a cishet man as it is to portray him as a gay trans man, even if i personally think its weird and impossible to imagine him with a girlfriend or something. its fine to have different interpretations of whatever; its Not fine to get mad at somebody because theyre not following fanon that u personally ascribe to

25. common fandom complaint that ur sick of hearing

'i dont read wlw content because its all the same :( why are all the mean lesbians getting so mad that my mlm ship is just better :( its not my fault those stupid broads arent written as well as my spicy yaoi :( what do u mean one half of my mlm ship is a lamp ur just being mean to a mlm because ur bitter that ur stupid bitches arent written as well as my mlm gay disaster babies :( stop bullying me for no reason u crazy psycho cunt this is why nobody gives a shit enough about ur dumbass wlw ship to make anything for it :('

obviously nothing wrong with mlm ships, i have been known to enjoy many mlm ships! but when a wlw (particularly a lesbian...) complains about the disproportionate amount of mlm fan content between characters who literally never spoke, stood next to each other once, or where one of them is literally Not A Character (clay terran is a prop i am not wrong about that), its SO FRUSTRATING to see the response be someone taking it as a personal attack and throwing the blame back out at wlw for not just shutting up and dealing with it. that post that showed among us had significantly more mlm fics over wlw fics on ao3 when Those Stupid Creatures Dont Even Have Gender/Character applies to like literally every other fandom

16. u cant understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc.)

any situation in which phoenix depends on miles for money during 7yg. similarly, royalty/medieval au where phoenix is some kind of servant to prince miles, and yes being a knight counts as being a servant in my mind. these two things feel wayyyyy imbalanced to me but in fanworks theyre portrayed as like necessary and appreciated by phoenix (in the money situation) or really romantic (in the royalty/medieval situation). idk, to me, phoenix would rather saw off his own arm and eat it than accept money, especially from miles, during 7yg, and if he did accept it it would only be because miles says 'let me do this for trucy then if ur gonna be so stubborn about it' and he Begrudgingly Agrees; with phoenix being miless knight, it just feels too much like people seeing phoenixs one-sided devotion to miles in aa1 and going 'this is normal and desirable behavior', and idk how to tell people this but phoenixs savior complex over miles is Not Good fjkdsjlfslak like it worked out for them but i dont think phoenixs behavior towards miles in aa1 especially is indicative of a well adjusted, emotionally stable person, and that hardly ever gets talked about its just 'wee wah hes soooo in luuuuurve isnt that romantic'

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

siblingsssss there are so many good sibling pairs/groups in aa. also wlw ship stuff In General because there is never enough in any fandom. also also (because i love to kick the hornets nest) more fic where the intention is to Tell An Actual Story With The Characters instead of projecting the authors trauma and/or kinks and/or personality onto the characters where it doesnt fit ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

18. its absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

idk if krisnix counts as slept on because ive only been in the fandom for a couple years, i know things were different like 10-15 years ago and maybe it was more popular then, but. krisnix. jfkdsjfls. there is soooooooo much narrative drama u can cook up with these two, so many scenarios and angles, and uve got 7 whole years to fill!! and u can be as serious and somber as u want, going into mental health and toxic relationships and what it means to spend so much of ur life with someone who is so bad for u but letting go isnt easy because thats years of ur life with that person ur being asked to let go of, OR u can be silly and say that kristoph is christian grays lawyersona, because come on i dare anyone to try and tell me kristoph Isnt Also the worlds worst dom

#mine #THANK U PEPPER I KISS U ON THE MOUF #im sorry its so many words. fjkdlsjklf

1 note · View note

obsessivelycapricious · 3 years

Text

18+ Jason Todd x fem!reader fic ramble.

Hey, so this is a idea i've had in my head for a while, but it won't leave me alone. I've kinda written the first part of it already? But idk if I'll finish it. I haven't worked out the ending yet either but a couple of lovely people were interested in hearing it so here goes! Thanks for the support! I'll tag you all separately.

Warnings: excessive torture, manipulation, gaslighting, rape, violence. kidnapping, interrogation, Stockholm syndrome, abuse. I dont specifically mention how old the characters are, but B-Man likes to pick them young so use your imagination to age them up a bit if you like. It's dark folks, and a super slow burn, though it might not be so bad written in brief here, but if those bother you it might not be a good idea to read it. (its hidden under the cut - PS it got super long - 2.5k words.)

You are Robin. Or, you were at least.

Batman picked you up out of crime alley, gave you a home and a purpose and trained you up to be one of the best deterrents to the crime in Gotham. You lived in the manor, and thought of Bruce and Alfred (even Dick) as your family. It's awesome and you love it!

Almost two years after donning the cape, something goes wrong. You get split up from Batman and taken by Jokers men. That night is the last night you see the sky for years.

Over the next three years, you are systematically abused, manipulated, gaslighted and tortured until you are a shell of your former self. Conditioned to obey his every whim, you micro dose of the small crumbs of affection Joker has to offer you. He gives you test after test, pushing you to your limit always in new and horrific ways. You don't hesitate when he asks you to shoot someone in the head or to beat someone to death. The consequences of fighting against him aren't worth it, you have learned that the hard way. He even doesn't always lock the door behind him and yet you don't try to escape.

You hate batman with a passion now, you regret ever having met the man, he has ruined your life and it's his fault that you are where you are now. He abandoned you. Used you for his games and then replaced you like you were nothing to him. It broke your heart when Joker showed you the footage of another Robin running along the rooftops. Your replacement. Heartbreak boiled over to fury and rage.

He passes you around his acquaintances, particularly Johnathan Crane who is eager to test his new strain of fear gas out. Under the gas you see the Bat sacrificing you again and again to get what he wants. If Scarecrow takes advantage of you while he has you in a vulnerable state, no one cares enough to stop him. He wants to know who the Bat is, but you know that telling him will put Alfred in danger and you'll do anything to avoid that

(Thankfully the joker doesn't want to know who the bat is, you're not sure you could defy him like that anymore.)

Then one day, a body gets thrown into the small cell you are kept in when joker doesn't want to play. Its a Robin. You panic, fear and anger confusing you while joker laughs in your face. You know it's another test but you can't figure out what the rules are.

This is where the fic starts. It's about Jason Todd's slow descent from a vibrant punk who loves being Robin to the dejected, abused shell of a boy who hates the caped crusader and will do anything Joker tells him. You know it'll happen, because that's what happened to you.

Only, Joker never does the same thing twice. Even if it works. You don't want to get attached to the boy, but birds of a feather and all that jazz.

Highlights (or lowlights) include:

Having to share a small confined cell with Jason.

Arguing about the Joker and escaping

"Don't you want to leave? Crazy bitch."

Finding out that Batman didn't even tell Jason about you:

“Why would he come for you anyway, huh? What makes you so special?” “I’m Robin. We’re partners. We’ve been through all kinds of shit together. We’re like this.” “Pah. You really believe it too, don’t you? Ya poor sap.” “What do you mean?” “Why go to the bother of finding a dumb punk like you when he can just make a new shiny Robin instead?” “He wouldn’t do that.” “He’s already done it. You ain’t the first.” “That Robin moved away, he’s doing his own thing now.” “I wasn’t talking about him. I meant the other one.” “What other one?” “The other one.” “There aren’t any other ones – I’m the only other Robin that there’s ever been.” “You motherfucker!”

Beating the shit out of Jason in a blind rage because he won't stop talking about how Batman will come for him.

“How long have you known Batsy for huh? If you know him so well.” “Nearly three years. How long have you known him huh? Oh that’s right – you don’t” “What? Three – Three years?” “That’s what I said. Look, I know this is scary, but I trust B-Man. He’ll come for me, we’ll kick all these guy’s asses, take Joker back to Arkham and get you out of here too. It’ll be okay, you’ll see.” “B-Man?” “Yeah, Batman.” “Shut up.” “What? Why?” “I don’t want to talk about him anymore so shut up!”

Jason finally figuring out who you are when Joker comes to punish you for denting his new toy.

Joker calling you pet names while manipulates you and you being terrified the Joker is going to replace you too

“Oh. Pumpkin, it’s alright. I thought we agreed we were over this, no? Batsy kicked you to the curb a long time ago. It’s old news! This shiny new toy of ours is your replacement.”. “What? You’re replacing me too?” “No, no no. I’d never dream of doing something so barbaric, Sweetheart. That’s the Bats’ M.O. You’re mine for keeps. I would never be that cruel, would I?”

Jason taking his anger out on you:

“Why do you hate B and not the Joker? He’s the one that’s doing this to you. He shipped you off to Crane and you didn’t even fight back.” “You have no idea what you’re talking about.” “No, I know exactly what I’m talking about. You’re screwed in the head. You’re a joke, you’ve given up. Some Robin you are. A real Robin fights back. You don’t deserve the title.”

Joker making you put your Robin suit back on to fight Jason for his amusement. Jason hesitates in the beginning but kicks your ass every time.

Jason trying to comfort you but being bad at it.

Joker asking your opinion on you what you think will break the boy:

"When he gets replaced. Show him."

Weeks of being beaten then long stretches of being left alone with Jason with no instructions.

Catching Jason staring at you when he thinks you're not paying attention.

Joker being caught and taken to Arkham so you both get knocked out and transported there too.

Joker ignores you the entire time he's there as he's being watched to closely, the separation sets you off into a panic when you think about it too much.

Most of Arkham is in on you being kept there. The prisoners who know about it are paid off by being able to play with you - and now Jason too.

Jason thinking in Arkham he would have more chance of being able to escape.

You being subjected to more of Crane's abuse and different types of gas.

Jason being brought back to your cell after being tortured by calendar man and offering him comfort for the first time.

Being cut open and tortured by Zsaz.

Huddling up in the abandoned wing of Arkham for warmth and comfort.

Remembering that you had met before, years ago in the Narrows before Batman took you to be his adopted daughter.

Jason taking care of you while you recover.

Giving Jason advice on how to cope and get through the different villains taking revenge on you.

Jason being hurt and tired and snapping at you, causing an argument where you lash out at him:

"I had to go through this all on my own, dickweed. I didn't have anyone to hold my hand and tell me I wasn't going to die. So fuck you! God forbid I try and help your sorry ass."

Jason being tortured by two-face and seeing Batman and a new Robin visiting Arkham. They don't hear him scream for them to help. It breaks his heart and his will to fight.

You knew it would happen, but seeing it first hand makes your heart break for him. You didn't want to be right. You hate Batman more for what he's done to Jason than what he's done to you.

"I was right there (y/n)! Right there and he didn't even look at me."

Talking about Alfred and how much he means to you both.

Thinking you might actually have feelings for Jason after all.

Being transported back to the compound when Joker finally breaks out of Arkham again only to be in separate cells.

Having major separation anxiety from not being able to tell if Jason is okay.

Joker being jealous of your attachment to Jason and doubling down on his control over you.

He tries to take you outside and you panic so badly you beg him to take you back because you're terrified of what being free will mean.

Joker telling you that you failed his test by getting attached to the boy. He tells you that he's going to kill Jason to teach you a lesson.

Being put back in a cell with Jason to find his face has been branded and he's just so utterly void of any hope or any life.

Sitting next to Jason in the cell with your head on his shoulder.

Jason knowing he's going to die without you having to tell him. His voice is quiet and resigned, almost with a shred of relief when he says:

"He's going to kill me soon, isn't he?" "I'm going to miss you, Jason Todd." "I'm glad I got to know you, (Y/N). I'm sorry I couldn't get us out." "It's okay."

You kissing his cheek as you drift off huddled together for the last time.

Joker forcing you to watch as he beats Jason repeatedly with a crowbar, ignoring your defiant cries and struggles for him to stop.

"Which hurts more Little Red? Hmm? Forehand? Or Backhand? I think (Y/N) would like to know!"

Joker blaming you for having to kill Jason:

"And all because of your silly school girl crush. What a waste. I'm very disappointed in you, Dolly."

Being dragged away screaming from his lifeless body and thrown into the back of a van just in time before the building explodes.

That's the first half. For the second half to the ending, I haven't quite figured out yet. I've got a few ideas, but I can't decide what would fit better, feel free to help me out here.

Batman could find her after all this time, new evidence being uncovered during the explosion and in his grief about finding Jason's body he could question that he never actually found yours. Of course then you'd be homicidal and try to kill him, resulting in you being locked in another cell, this time in the Batcave. You'd get to scream at him about all his failings and what a terrible person he is though so that could be cathartic. Alfred (And Dick a little) manages to talk you back to some kind of sanity but you are forever changed by this. You meet Red Hood at a later date: on your way to find an egg and cheese sandwich when someone pulls a gun on you. Seeing you again jars him out of his own homicidal rage long enough to care about the girl who he couldn't save, giving the BatFam an opening to reason with him some.

-Or-

Joker keeps you hidden away and the Bat still has no idea you even exist. It stays that way for two more years where you eventually become completely numb to everything he or his acquaintances do to you. Joker eventually gets bored at the lack of reaction and in his boredom he gets careless. A new vigilante takes it upon himself to blow up to compound and best all Joker's men, he escapes but the vigilante doesn't chase after him and instead he finds you. You resist his attempts to save you, knowing how angry Joker will be so instead, Red Hood punches you in the face, knocking you out. He carries out into the night and you wake up somewhere new and he tries to help unravel the fuck ton of issues you've got while dealing with his own. He'll probably enlist the BatFam to help once he's done wanting to kill them, unless you can talk him into killing the Bat together, after the Joker dies of course.

-Or-

One day, maybe a year after Jason dies, Joker decides he's bored of you and gives you one last curveball. After more than 6 years of being isolated and abused, you wake up in an alley on the streets of Gotham, alone. Abandoned again. After several panic attacks and not knowing if it was a test and that you should run back to the Joker or going to find Alfred because he's the only person in the world left that you trust, you decide to leave Gotham altogether. You make it out and somehow navigate your way to having an apartment, a job and even a quiet life in Bludhaven, away from the Bat and the Clown and the nightmares. Except that one day, while you're drinking your morning coffee in a café, Dick Grayson sits down opposite you. You're stable enough not to react immediately, and Dick seems to really care that you're alive and well. Turns out that the Bat found out about you and decided to leave you alone this whole time (which only serves to double down on your feelings of abandonment) Only the joker is out of control and they think that you could help them by giving them an insight into how the joker works. They've got a new Vigilante to deal with too so they're stretched pretty thin. You flat out refuse which is when it turns out it really wasn't a request. You are taken back to Gotham and confronted with the BatFam, helping them reluctantly when Red Hood breaks into your new apartment, demanding information. You argue, and it feels too familiar, setting off a panic attack when he ribs you about your complicated relationship with the Joker. Identities are revealed and you work together to take down the Joker.

The epilogue to this saga would be some time after any of those options.

Both you and Jason finally in a healthier place where you can actually acknowledge what has been growing between you two since you were paired together all those years ago. It's not a neat and tidy happily ever after, it's messy and full of arguments, fears and misunderstandings but it's also full of tenderness, softness and love. And the sex is really good too.

If you got this far, thanks for reading! Let me know what you think? Come chat to me anytime!

#jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #dc imagines #jason todd imagine #jason todd #dc comics #dark fic #18+#joker #TW

111 notes · View notes

just-your-local-astronaut · 3 years

Text

Out of this world hq fanfics, my favorites (part one)

Please check trigger warnings before reading any of these fics. <3

☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆

Title: Open Tab

Author: Mooifyourecows @mooifyourecows is the author of the two following fics

No Archive warnings

Rating: E

Ship: Daichi/Sugawara (DaiSuga)

Length: 56 chapters, 541,570 words

Status: Unfinished but it ends on an acceptable note.

Author’s summary: All Sugawara wants is a little inspiration. All Daichi wants is for his regulars to finally pay off their tab. All everyone else wants is to drink good liquor and watch as their best friends struggle.

The words in the stars say: I’ve read this fic so many times. Even with it being 56 chapters and 541,570 words, it’s SO GOOD. The character development Suga goes through with and without Daichi brings so much to talk about. I’m not one for angst but when it hit (don’t worry it’s a happy ending) it made this fic more loveable in my eyes. I loved the side pair content, all my favs were there. IwaOi and MatsuHana side pairs? Yes please. It’s written so well and with the dick jokes, constant amazing karaoke, and dynamic between art student Suga and bartender Daichi, I couldn’t be laughing any harder or know anymore knowledge about alcohol.

I rate this fic 10 aliens out of 10, absolutely worth the read.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8597737/chapters/19717108

☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆

Title: Misery’s Company

Author: Mooifyourecows (another by them, they’re an amazing author!!)

No Archive warnings

Rating: E

Ship: Daichi/Sugawara (DaiSuga)

Length: 10 chapters, 62,124 words

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: Sugawara Koushi hates his boyfriend. Fortunately for him, so does Sawamura Daichi.Together, they come up with a plan to make his life miserable. And fail in exactly the way you'd expect them to.

The words in the stars say: Another fic I cannot and will not stop reading and recommending. This is definitely one of my comfort fics that should be yours too. I love the tone throughout the story and how Suga’s goal changes overtime. Oh my god. Did I see head over heels Daichi for a revenge looking badass Suga?? Yes I did. I’m not one to spoil, but if you’re looking for something to read where you’ll be shouting “YES!!” and pumping your fists into the air, first of all, me too. Second of all this is your fic! This is a heart warming read full of bittersweet revenge and growth. The details for both main characters should not go unnoticed and please PLEASE if you’ve read this fic, talk to me about it.

I rate this 10 aliens out of 10.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19363300/chapters/46069294

☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆

Title: Rules

Author: ConesofDunshire

No Archive warnings

Rated: E

Ship: Bokuto/Akaashi (BokuAka)

Length: 20 chapters, 120,327 words

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: In which Akaashi Keiji is an overworked accountant who stumbles upon Bokuto one night playing the piano in the lobby of his work. Bokuto is different, that much is obvious. But with such supreme musical talent and a smile so dazzling it rivals the sun, there's just something about him that brings Akaashi back every night.

The words in the stars say: Rules was one of my first bokuaka fics I read and I’m so glad it was. This story follows pianist Bokuto and tired accountant Akaashi. Akaashi, intrigued by music playing in his office building, finds a man, Bokuto, sitting on the piano bench. When I think of this fic I remember awing like they do in those stupid old sitcoms and laughing at Akaashi’s coworkers with their habit of gambling. I also read the second fic following Kuroo and Terushima, “Need” by ConesofDunshire, and I was not at all disappointed. I adored the side KenHina with their family of cats and DaiSuga as married neighbors.

I rate this 10 aliens out of 10. Always a favorite read rain or shine.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6143563/chapters/14076601

KuroTeru fic link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7673326/chapters/17476645

☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆

Title: Only Fools Fall

Author: oseltamivir_phosphate @dahliadenoire on tumblr,,

No Archive warnings

Rated: M

Ship: Iwaizumi/Oikawa (IwaOi)

Length: 6 chapters, 126,760 words

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: Oikawa had always wanted to be an alpha like Iwaizumi. He hated being a beta – the lesser status, but not entirely the least. That was until he experienced his first heat during his second year in university, and he wonders if it's too late to turn back into a beta.

The words in the stars say: Don’t runaway when I tell you this but...this fic is Omegaverse. NOW, NOW, DONT GO. I SWEAR, IT’S WRITTEN WELL SO ITS NOT WEIRD. Seriously, I’ve had some bad experiences with Omegaverse where I never wanted to read it again, but I love IwaOi so I gave this a chance and boy there was hope for Omegaverse in my mind after reading. I knew it was gonna be good when I saw the chapters were named after songs, linked in the notes. This fic orbits Alpha Iwa and Oikawa, who’s supposed to be a Beta. Shoutout to all my BL readers, sir pulled a Hyesung. RIP Oiks. Fortunately for Oikawa, Iwa is there for him whether its bringing curly fries to lure Oikawa out of his room or defending him during his weakest moments. I don’t want to give too much away but even if you aren’t a fan of Omegaverse I would still totally recommend you to read this.

I rate it 10 aliens out of 10.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6796795/chapters/15522097

☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆

Title: Student of the Sun

Author: a_very_smolfrog

No Archive warnings

Rating: M

Ship: Kageyama/Hinata (KageHina)

Length: 14 chapters, 72,247 words

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: He knew it wasn’t going to be easy, he had barely made it out alive the first time, but he was a different man now. And with Hinata by his side he hoped that maybe, just maybe , he would be able to learn to love again.~~~Kageyama is a single father who escaped an abusive relationship. He starts to fall in love with his daughter’s kindergarten teacher when things take a turn for the worst. Can Hinata save him from his dark past?

The words in the stars say: I fuckin love the single parent au AND BRO KAGEYAMA WITH HIS ADORABLE DAUGHTER AND HINATA BEING THE TEACHER FOR HER MMMMMM. I HATE KIDS BUT KAGS DAUGHTER,,, SHE OWNS MY HEART. The side parings too!! AND THE ANGSTTTT (It’s a happy ending dw). I love Tsukki only letting Kag’s daughter call him Tsukki. There’s also a short fic called “I promise” which looks further into IwaOi’s story throughout Student of the Sun. This fic is so cute and has the worst twist that ends up making a fabulous ending. Please please PLEASE read this fic it’s so good.

I rate this fic 10 aliens out of 10.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22357693/chapters/53412502#main

IwaOi spinoff: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23806030

☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆彡･:*:★☆彡::･★彡･::･☆

╭﹒┄﹒⁀ჲ ˚ ̣ ˖ ┄┄┄┄┄┄┄﹒

﹕Thank you for reading!

﹕What did you think?

﹕Dms are always open. Come talk! ╰﹒┄﹒✦ ˚ ̟ ハ︿︿ ๑ ┄┄┄┄┄┄﹒

<3 -Cal

91 notes · View notes

galaxwrites · 2 years

Text

Reality

i wrote some aviskull based on something that happened in Wildermyth :D

Ship: Aviators x Skull

Warnings: ...I want to say unreality? It's something, and I think that's the closest to it. It's only in fic, nothing meta, but if you dont wanna read stuff like that, don't read this. Also, panic attacks but only slightly

Summary: The thrixl have a strange power, and Skull falls victim to it.

@roseluckskyy

{Reblogs > Likes}

The Wings of Destiny fought Thrixl. That part was obvious-the Thrixl were everywhere these days, it was almost scary. Especially with their ability to weave unrealities, dream realms that seem almost real.

Skull thought there was nothing scarier than that. Not knowing what is real, the thought terrified him. For a while, Skull was incredibly paranoid. He thought everything and everyone was an illusion woven by the Thrixl.

Until he met Aviators.

Something about him seemed so, so familiar. So sweet. So... right. Skull knew this should've been even more of a sign of the Thrixl's magic, but it wasn't. Avi wasn't. Avi was real.

Skull fell in love, and Avi did too. It felt like a dream but, not one woven by the Thrixl. They would weave it and tear Avi away but that never happened. Avi stayed, no matter what happened.

It was a wonderful summer night when they got married. They danced in the darkness and then in the growing dawn. Skull loved it all, and he loved Avi even more.

They'd been married for a decade, when it happened. The Mothman sent out a distress signal. Of course, Skull got worried. Really, worried.

So, the gang set out to save him, clearing out as many beasts as they could find.

They were almost there.

Skull didn't know when it happened- he blinked, and was surrounded by a burning village.

Oh, gods.

"...Guys?" Skull called out. "Emperor? Galax?" He turned around, only to be greeted with more fire. "..Kaede?"

Now he was starting to panic. His breath quickened, and he felt his heartbeat quicken. "...A-Avi?!"

He frantically looked around, a lump forming in his throat. "No. This, t-this can't be happening."

He doubted his own mind.

Was all of his years, his adventures, were all of them woven by the thrixl? Was this his life, in a burning village, surrounded by death?

Skull didn't know.

He didn't know what his life was. He didn't know what to trust.

Okay, Skull, calm down. There's got to be a way.

He took a breath, and balled his hands into a fist before unclenching them.

"Come on. There needs to be a way to figure this out."

Skull closed his eyes, and took a breath. He needed to focus. What was the realest thing he knew?

...

Avi.

Avi was real. He was too good to be an illusion woven by the Thixl. Skull love Aviators. He loved him. Avi couldn't be fake. Their wedding, their love, it couldn't be a dream.

Skull clung onto his memories of Avi, his hearty laugh, his purple hair, His broad shoulders...

The smell of smoke began to fade.

Skull focused further. He can do this. Their first meeting was in a forest. They locked eyes and fell in love. Their wedding music was a beautiful tune that sounded of the forest. Their first kiss was a clumsy lock of lips after a battle.

He heard a voice calling his name. Avi!

Skull opened his eyes. Avi's gentle blue eyes rested on Skull's yellow ones. Avi visibly relaxed, and tightly hugged the hunter.

"Thank god you're alright. You passed out so suddenly- I thought you died.."

Skull shakily hugged back, burying his face in Avi's shoulder, taking in as much as his comforting scent as he could. "Y-you're real.."

"Of course I am, Skull.." Avi said. "I'm real.. I'm real and you're safe."

The hunter just about sobbed, as Avi's hand gently rubbed his back.

The hissing noises of the thrixl grew close, and Skull only tightened his hold. "A-Avi, I'm... I'm s-scared."

"You're gonna be alright, love." Avi said. "I'll take these out for you."

He set Skull down against a rock, and kissed his forehead. "Stay here."

Skull watched, as the rest of the company took out the Thrixl. Emperor's talons ripped into a thrusk, Avi's hammer bashed its way into a bard. And, soon enough, the thrixl were all dead.

Avi sighed in relief, and ran over to Skull. "You alright?"

Skull nodded, once again clinging onto Avi. "I'm alright... Thank you, Avi."

"Anytime, Skull."

The group headed on their way, once more. Skull smiled at Avi, trailing slightly behind him, with only one thing he wanted to say to the man he loved.

"You're my reality"

#coroika #coroika skull #coroika aviators #aviskull #lilac lovers #aviators x skull #splatoon #wildermyth #coroika fanfiction

9 notes · View notes

imaginethathaikyuu · 3 years

Note

How did I find your blog? I was looking for soft Kuroo content on google. And your soft birthday hc’s for him came up. And that’s also how I found tumblr

What was the first story of yours that I read? That Kuroo piece ^

Roughly, how long have I been following this blog? Well I found that piece shortly after it was posted so…. Around the beginning of December 2019 I think. Got a tumblr a few months later and you were the first person I followed (had you in my bookmarks bar before that! (still have you in my bookmarks bar and when I share my screen in classes there are occasionally questions. I ignore them))

What’s something I’ve noticed about you personality wise? You’re really clever and funny. But you’re also sweet. But because you’re clever you have no hesitation in setting up and enforcing your boundaries, and I really admire that strength and confidence.

Have we ever interacted, either by PM, ask, or in the comments? What was my perception of you? YES!!! PM, SOOOOO many asks, comments, and you sent me an ask. And reblogged it. And I cried. A lot. My perception: you’re lovely and I want to h*ld your h*nd ….please.

What’s my favorite story of yours? Oh how to choose. Firstly, I’m a nb, biracial, bisexual. Honey, I’ve never made a choice in my life. But let’s try here. Anything you’ve written for Tsukki. Literally all of it is gold. Fight me. I was going to write “especially [piece title]” but I LITERALLY CANNOT CHOOSE ONE. Your Bokuto nightmare piece. Your Kuroo angsty fight. Your Tendou dealing with S/O with parents who yell piece. Your Kinktobers. Your Futakuchi and Mattsun pieces. And your Terushima pieces. Ugh. I CANNOT CHOOSE. OH AND YOUR STREAMER KENMA!!!!!! OKay just… all of it. I can’t choose. I tried, and I failed, and I’m willing to admit failure.

What’s a story I’d love to see you write? I don’t want to say this… because it hurts me… but I just KNOW you’d write brilliant angst. Some of my fav pieces of yours are pained beginnings with happy endings. That fight with Tsukki after a bad day at work. The pieces I mentioned above (nightmare pieces and fighting pieces and angsty home life ha.. ha.ha.ha.). That Oikawa one where the reader wakes up in bed without him and thinks he left. You write these gorgeous atmospheres and descriptive, visceral feelings, and if you chose to use it for evil…. You could get evil shit done. You’re SO powerful. So I want to read it… but also…. I don’t. I’d love to see you write ABO like you mentioned a while back or just see you explore a cutesy soulmate AU or something. I think you’d be really good at writing an AU where you hear what the other person’s listening too. I feel like you’d be so good at making me feel something for someone who was in another city. (think this would be cute with Tsukki cos he’s headphones boy, OR terushima because I like the dynamic of someone flirty, who clearly cares about looks, falling for someone he can’t see) ANYWAY….

Favorite pairing you write for?/fav reader insert? Tsukishima x reader. It’s my fav self-ship. (but also Mattsun, Bokuto, Oikawa, Tanaka, and Akaashi because you write them SO WELL!!!!)

Have any of your stories helped me through a hard time? Of course. Your self-harm piece came at a time I needed it. Iwaizumi’s in particular saved my life. But also your Tendou dealing with S/O parents who fight… came right when I needed it. Also starting college… was hard.. And reading and rereading your fluff really pulled me through it.

Have any of your stories hit closer to home? YES (see above).

Do I genuinely like your blog, it’s aesthetic or posts? It’s overall feel? It’s content? Yes. The aesthetic is, ngl, a wee bit basic. But I kinda love that. And the feel? It feels like home. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Your blog is my safe space. So, yes, I love. It’s content? YES. OF COURSE. Your personality probably could have kept me here even if your content was kinda shit, but I follow you RELIGIOUSLY because of your content. So yes. I adore.

Is English my first language? Kinda??? I grew up in a trilingual household so I kinda learned three languages at the same time while growing up. But no, I don’t need to translate it in my head. Because English was one of the three.

Anything I want to share? Yes. Please keep being kind to yourself, caring for your mental health, enforcing your boundaries, loving Akaashi, and just generally being you. You’re so lovely as you are, and I hope you continue grow, but never change. Also I’m sorry about all your work stuff…. It literally makes me feel sick. And I hope you find a job where that’s not tolerated, or that your work finds a better way of protecting it’s employees. I know you know this, but none of it is your fault. I just hope things improve. AND I love you… a lot. And I’m so proud of you hitting 9K and you deserve so many more followers because your pieces are just... GORGEOUS. I can’t wait until I’m at Barnes and Noble in a few years and I can pick up a hardback copy of your debut novel. I’m so excited to say “I knew Em Akaashi (which is your legal name as far as I’m concerned) before she was so popular among the masses.”

so ive been trying to figure out the correct and worthy way to reply to this ask since the moment i got it......because its so fucking sweet and kind and amazing and pure and perfect and i just dont know how to use WORDS to explain the way it makes me feel so.......i will just reply in bullet points in regards to every question u answered to make it a lil easier :D

- the fact that u found my blog on google ....... like this may be odd and a very specific thing but before i made this blog i always hoped that 1 day my fanfic would pop up in google searches bc thats ALWAYS how i found fics when i was reading them religiously and i felt so much ENVY!!!!! LIKE I WANTED TO BE THERE I WANTED MY FICS TO B POPULAR ENOUGH TO POP UP ON GOOGLE.....that may sound very selfish but its true......so thats just very cool to me... :]

- u’ve been here for so long omg 🥺🥺🥺🥺 if anyone in ur classes ever asks jus promo my blog like its nbd

- thats so sweet what 🥺🥺🥺 i try my best to advocate for myself and be confident for myself.....ive spent far too much of my time being silently uncomfortable because i was afraid of pushing someone’s buttons seeming rude.....but NO MORE!!!! i know what upsets me, i know my triggers, i know what i dislike experiencing, and im never gonna let myself be anxious or uncomfortable for someone else’s sake, esp if theyre being rude 2 me. i would say its less strength and confidence and moreso me attempting to take control of my anxiety in the places i can (aka on the Internet) bc i am SICK OF ANXIETY ATTACKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- BBY no dont CRY!!!! im racking my brain trying to think of who u are i wanna know so bad so i can thank u personally for being the kindest person in the world n so i can send u more asks >:(........MY HAND IS URS TO HOLD!!!!! dont tell akaashi tho

- OMG my TSUKKI pieces.....hes so hard to write why ;-; thank u so much im so glad u enjoy my works<3333

- NOT ANGST NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! pained beginnings to happy endings are my specialty.....IMAGINE me writing a sad ending like i CANT!!!!!!!!! ive only done it a few times and it is so Difficult.....YALL ARE SO LUCKY IM NOT EVIL!!!!!! ive had this idea for an angsty akaashi fic that i think about and write in my head every night before falling asleep and it Hurts and i wanna write it but i also can’t make myself :D ABO would be very fun but i genuinely do not know how to explore the concept while making it feel like it’s Written By Me.....u know what i mean? same with soulmate aus, i really dislike writing them because theyre just boring to me like they all feel the same everything’s been done for them.....which is FINE!!! but i write enough cliche stuff as it is HAHA, a long distance type soulmate au could be fun and interesting but ldr’s trigger me bc of a past relationship so </3 but hey maybe someone else could use the idea!!!!!

- gotta love tsukishima <3

- im rlly glad my writing could be there for you friend, one of the biggest reasons i write fanfic (and write the kind of fics i write) is bc i know firsthand how much reading sweet stories abt ur comfort characters can help u through the shittiest times - i just wanna offer ppl some support and happy feelings and love cuz sometimes fanfic is the only time we can find those things (and theres nothing shameful abt that either if anyone bullies u for reading fanfic i will fight them)

- I KNOW MY LAYOUT IS LAZY AND BASIC AS FUCK AND THAT IS BECAUSE I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT LMAOOOO so im glad u think its ok...... like i dont have the patience to create a fancy ass layout that actually works are u KIDDING ME??????? I COULD LITERALLY NEVER plus i kinda like that its just the basic kinda ugly boring default layout like it makes it simple and easy and i feel like it brings focus to the only thing on this blog that i care about which is my writing, i rlly only care about the content here and not aesthetics jdbljdabsdk that blue background will be there til i Die......i adore u more btw

- WHOA trilingual what the hell ur so cool tell me more

- you have my word, friend, that i will continue to do all of that so long as you do the same. take care of yourself, be kind to yourself - i know u can do it, ur so kind to others and u deserve to be kind to urself, too so this is the part that genuinely brought me to tears because *sappy dumb shit ahead* ok look ever since i can remember the one and only thing ive wanted to do with my life is become an author ...... dreams of book covers with my name written on them and words in pages written by me and fanart of my characters and going into my local bookstore n seeing my book there....these thoughts all haunt my fucking brain because i want it SO BAD!!!!!!!! so bad that it makes me CRY!!!!!!!! ive never wanted something more and just!!!!!!!!!!!! idk how much u meant that part but holy fuck!!!!!! i hope so bad that one day i can send u a free copy of my book as a thank u for being the person u are. u have all my love friend, every last bit of it <333333333

#ily<3 #long post

29 notes · View notes

love-fireflysong · 3 years

Note

You’re bored? How about you answer the rest of the questions for Climbing Crash? 😂😂 (pretty please 🥺)

Oh lordy, let’s do this I guess! Also this is posted like super late, sorry about that I didn’t see this until just before I left for work asdljasldj. Also, most of these will be answered in respect to my outlast au obvs, cause that’s the type of climbing chrash I’ve got on the brain!

GENERAL

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? Without spoiling too much, cause this is a scene I’m super looking forward to write someday, Josh finally brings it up after Chris and Ashley confront him about why he’s been so cagey and irritated lately. Once it’s out in the open though, the two of them just go ‘oh’ and its answers a lot of their questions on why they’d been feeling so awkward recently.

Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like? Seeing as they’re trying to keep the fact that they’re dating a secret from literally everyone, their first ‘date’ was them watching a movie and crashing on the couch when they stayed up too late. They absolutely woke up stiff and sore and tangled, and they happiest they had been in a while.

What was their first kiss like? Hesitant, unsure, and awkward, (just like them <3) but it felt like a piece they had always been missing just slotted right into place. But oh man the ones following were anything but.

Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)? Look at these dorks. You expect me to believe that Chris and Ash, who were so hung up on each other, and Josh, who was so busy trying to get his best friends together that he ignored his own feelings, had interest in dating other people? I mean, even if Josh did date occasionally in high school, I can’t see it lasting long cause it just felt wrong to NOT have Chris and Ash there with him, so he either ends it pretty quickly or the other person realized that Josh really wasn’t into it a whole lot and shut it down themselves. They were absolutely 100% each other’s first everything.

What’s their height difference? Age difference? Do I even need to explain this one? I mean it’s right there in canon lol. Josh and Chris are the same height, with Ash going up to about their chin. That being said, age difference wise, I totally headcanon that Josh is not quite 2 years older then Ash, and Chris is about 1 1/2 years older then her.

What’s their relationship with each other’s families? Once upon a time, before the events that lead into my outlast au? Things were great, they were constantly at the others house to hang out and shit since they were kids so their parents tended to think of them like extra kids. Now? Oh the Washington’s hate Ashley.

Who takes the lead in social situations? Josh obviously. The dude is a rich, charismatic asshole who is used to shmoozing and rubbing elbows with other rich, charismatic assholes. Guy’s got a silver tongue what can I say 😏

Who gets jealous easier? Honestly? I think there was absolutely a period of time when they first started dating where they weren’t jealous of other people hanging out with them, but jealous of each other. Like there was some major insecurities that had to be worked out.

Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear? Oh Josh 100%. Def def def just pops behind one of the others to whisper the dirtiest shit into their ears just to watch them turn into a fucking tomato and squeak in embarrassment. The others hope he’ll get over it eventually, he never does.

LOVE

Who said “I love you” first? Either Josh or Ashley I think. Kind of waffling back and forth on them, but I’m leaning more Ash right now. Don’t wanna go too much further into this cause I’m still sorting through how this scene is gonna happen myself. I’ve got ideas, but very very loose ones.

What are their primary love languages? Had to look up what these were lol. Ummmmm, physical touch and quality time definitely, but words of affirmation are a big one too, just less so.

Who uses cheesy pick-up lines? Chris. Just, just Chris. Nothing makes him happier then using the worst pick up line ever and watching Ash and Josh groan and/or laugh in response. Josh will use them too, his just tends to come hand in hand with the whole inappropriate whispering thing lol.

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA? PDA? They’re trying to keep everything on the down low, so very little. But once things are out in the open, they almost always squished together and hands stuck into another’s pockets. In private though? Oh boy, good luck separating these assholes. They were absolutely those friends that were just super relaxed and willing to hang off the others or sit on them at the drop of a hat. Now that they’re dating they are even worse.

Who initiates kisses? Oh man, so I’ve been thinking about this for like an entire day now, and I STILL DONT KNOW. I mean, Chris and Ashley seem to me the type of people who absolutely adore the more ‘innocent’ and ‘sweetly romantic’ kisses; like cheek, knuckles, forehead type jazz. Makes them feel all bubbly and giggly and warm. But Josh is the one who goes for the more sensual/sexual I think; base of the neck, corner of the mouth, nip of the ear. He takes a frankly scary amount of joy in watching the other two just get all flustered and turn into stammering messes. So Chris and Ash are more likely initiate the everyday and sweet ones, whereas Josh loves initiating the ones that lead into something more. Does that make sense?

Who’s the big and little spoon? I think that they’re less spoons and more sandwiches honestly lol. But when spooning does happen, Josh absolutely refuses to be the little spoon. Ever. Chris is more then happy to be either the holder or the hold-ee, he doesn’t care which as long as he’s there. Meaning that Ash tends to get regulated to little spoon, but she’ll glady hold on when the chance arises. When they’re feeling particularly clingy though? Well, that’s my little secret ;)

What are their favorite things to do together? Is everything an answer? Cause it’s everything.

Who’s better at comforting the other? Chris is definitely more skilled at the whole comforting thing no question. But the other two aren’t too bad at it themselves.

Who’s more protective? If you’re expecting me to say Chris, well then you’re wrong. It’s absolutely Josh and Ashley. They’ve been through some shit before and after they got together in this au. If you even think of hurting her boys, Ashley will not hesitate to rip your head off and tear you to shreds, physically or verbally. Josh is less obvious about his anger, and that almost makes him more dangerous.

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection? Physical affection all the way. They’re just so used to being able to just touch each other whenever they wanted that the blow of having it taken away just about breaks them.

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise? Oh jesus. Okay, so I don’t know how many people have listened to my really messy outlast au playlist, but a decent chunk of it is just climbing chrash songs. So the few I’m about to share are ones that I think apply to them in general, but I have a veritable laundry list of songs that work specifically to this particular au. You’re Mine - Disturbed Wind Me Up - Strange Kids Cemetery Weather - Isles & Glaciers Blindfold - Sleeping Wolf (i can feel it in my bones that this is a climbing chrash song, i just can’t tell you why)

Whispers in the Dark - Skillet

What kind of nicknames do they call each other? They really don’t. I mean we got Cochise, but that’s about it. Other than that it’s just the shortened form of their names. (I had Josh call Ashley ‘Red’ in another fic, but that was before they even knew each others names, I don’t think he ever really uses it again. Maybe if he’s feeling a little competitive? Maybe?)

Who remembers the little things? Oh definitely Ashley, for good or for worse. She will remember the time you promised her half a chocolate bar and only gave her the last bite as easily as the time you picked up the book she had been looking at for ages on the way home one day and gave her a kiss on the head when she started to read it immediately after.

Ship questions over here!

#jesus-hotsauce-christmas-cake #asks #climbing chrash #seriously though im so sorry this took a while to get back to you #but i answered everything!#honestly dying at the fact that i got a ton of cimbing chrash questions though #and only one for chrashley alskdaslkhdals #let the climbing chrash revelution begin!

10 notes · View notes

kendrixtermina · 4 years

Text

Further reactions to "The book of lost tales":

I appreciate that Idril canonically wears armor and does swordfighting.

I feel like I can actually imagine adult!Idril much better now like in armor and with open hair, distraught but ready to fight while babby Earendil does not yet realize the danger...

My first thought is that Earendil was probably cute in that baby chainmail. My second thought is OUCH, Idril and Tuor always made sure their growing baby had fitting chainmail cause they felt the apocalypse might get them at any moment. Imagine that, imagine them having the baby armor fitted every year or so :(

Its fun how much of the basic structure already exists but most of what you'd consider the main characters doesn't exist or is scattered across various minor roles The only Prince anywhere in sight is Turgon - Except for Team Doriath, theyre all accounted for. I suppose Maeglin is kinda there in name only with vaguely the same role & motivation, but looks personality and background all did a 180 since. Luthien is still pretty much "princesd classic" at this point, not quite the fearless go-getter from the final version - markedly this version tells Beren that she doesnt want to wander in the wilderness with him whereas the final one says she doesnt care and its Beren still wants to get the shiny so as not to ask this of her and also for his honor.

I mean in the finished version Id consider the 3rd and 4th gen royals to be the main characters (well, alobgside Team Doriath and the varioud human heroes) and theyre hardly here. Imagine the silm with no Finrod!

Feanor had no affiliation with the royal family whatsoever, and is also generally less super. He's just the guy who won the jewelsmithing competition, not the inventor of the whole discipline. Still seems to have been envisionad as a respected member of the community who gets called to the palace for crisis meetings and is listened to when he stsrts giving speeches. From the first he already has the backstory of going off the deep end (or at least growing disillusioned with Valinor) after a family member is killed by Melkor and theyre still the first to die, but its just some other rando unrelated to the royals

The situation regarding the humans is different - instead of Melkor leaking their existence, its Manwe who explains that the other continents were supposed to be for them eventually. So Feanor goes off on a tirade about weak puny mortals comes off as a more of a jerk unlike in the final version where Melkor barely knew about the humans and described them to the Noldor as a threat. On the other hand in this one, also very much unlike in the finished product, Melkor dupes even Manwe into being unfair to the elves as a whole. In this the final version is a definite improvement, both Feanor and the Valar come off as a lot more sympathetic and though still deceived he's partially right in some things at least, so you have more of a genuine tragedy rather than a simple feud

There is something to the idea of Commoner!Feanor tho. I guess some of this survived in his nomadic explorer lifestyle and how both his wife and mother (who arent mentioned here) eventually were the ones to get that background of being not especially pretty ladies who are not from the nobility but got renown, respect and acclaim for their unique talent and contribution to society, with each having invented things and Nerdanel also being renowed for her wisdom. Hes sort of an odysseus-like Figure in that sense. I suppose later developements necesitated that Maedhros & co. have an army not just a band of thieves, which means they needed to be nobles/lords. That said this being a society where artisans are very respected and half the lords have scholarly/artistic pursuits going, the gap was probably not as big to begin with as it might have been in say, medieval England. Esoecially since Nerdanel's father had been given special honor by one of the local deities and that the social order might have been a very recent thing in Miriel's time. One might speculate that the first generation of Lords started out as warriors during the great journey, or perhaps just Finwe's friend group.

Also found that bit intetesting where the Valar have to deal with the remaining political tensions and effects of Melkor's lies on the remaining population in Valinor... - i guess with the change of framing device it was less likely for news of something like this to reach Beleriand. That, or the existence of Finarfin and his repentance made this go smoother this over in later cannon

Turgon's go-down-with-the-ship moment reaaly got to me. Im half tempted to write a fic where his wife, siblings and dad glomp him on arrival in Mandos. I dont care that none of them exists yet in this continuity i want Turgon to get hugs

I love all the additional Detail that got compressed out in the shift from fairytale-ish to pseudohistoric style especially all the various Valinor magic insofofar as it is compatible with the final version - particularly love the idea of the connection between the lamps and the trees that is now integrated into my headcanon forever

Its actually explained what the doors of night are

If I had not already read unfinished tales or volumes X to XII where this is also apparent, this is where I would say: Ah so the Valar were supposed to be flawed characters. Manwe has an actual arc; by the time he sends Gandalf he finally "got" it. I think in the published silm the little arcs of Ulmo and Manwe are mostly just lost in compression/ less apparent when only some of the relevant scenes got in but not all

It occurred to me way too late that the "BG" chars are the most consistent because theyre at the start and most stories are written from beginning to end. Finwe doesnt get a dedicated paragraph of explicit description until HoME X but my takeaway was that he's described pretty much like I always imagined him anyways/ same vibe I always got from him... charismatic, thoughtful, enthusiastic, sanguine temperament, brave in a pinch but at times lets his judgement be clouded by personal sentiment (though that last bit is more apparent/salient as a character flaw once he became the father of a certain Problem Child) ...i guess this would be a result of jrrt having had a consistent idea of him in his head for a long time.

This means Finwe's still alive at the time of the exodus which is just fun to see/interesting to know... Interestingly he sort of gets what later would be Finarfin's part of ineffectually telling everxone to please chill and think it over first while Feanor simply shouts louder (which is consistent with his actions before the sword incident in later canon where he initially spoke out against the suspiciozs regarding the Valar) - but its not exactly the same, he's more active than Finarfin later in that when "chillax" availed nothing he said that then at least they should talk with the other Kings and Manwe to leave with their blessing and get help leaving (This seems like it would have been the clusterfuck preventing million dollar suggestion in the universe where Feanor is related to him and values him) but when even that falls on death ears he decides that he "would not be parted from his people" and went to run the preparations. I find it interesting that the motivation is sentiment/attachment (even phrased as "he would not be parted from [his people]" same words/ expression as is later used for the formenos situation), not explicitly obligation as it later is for Fingolfin (who had promised to follow Feanor and didnt want to leave his subjects at the mercy of Feanor's recklessness )

Speaking of problem children. It seems the sons of Feanor were the Kaworu Nagisa of the Silmarillion in that originally all they do is show up at some point and kill Dior as an episodic villain-of-the-week. And then, it seems their role got bigger in each continuity/rewrite... probably has something to do with the Silmarils ending up in the title later making it in the sense their story that ends and begins with them. They have zero characterization beyond "fierce and wild" at this point, though in what teetsy bits there is we already have the idea that Maedhros is the leader and Curufin is the smart one/shemer/sweet-talker, though not the bit where Maedhros (or Maglor, or anyone really) is "the nice one". Which I guess explains why "Maglor" sounds like such a stereotypical villain name.

"The Ruin of Doriath" was purportedly the patchworkiest bit of the finished product, but I never noticed and it actually left quite an impression of me upon first reading, the visual of Melian sitting there with Thingol's corpse in her arms contemplating everything thinking back to how they met... she had the knowledge to warn him not to doom himself but couldnt get him to understand it because he doesnt see the world as she does.... After reading this though I wish there was a 'dynamic' rendition that combined all the best bits like, youd have to adapt it to the later canon's rendition of the dwarves, have Nargothrond exist etc. But i mean that just makes Finrod another dead/doomed relative of Thingol's whom bling cannot truly replace, like Luthien and Turin. In the Silmarillion you could easily read it as just an "honoured guest treatment" but here and in unfinished tales I get the impression that Thingol actually did see Turin as a son.

Already you see the idea of trying to make the stories all interconnected but there is less than there will be (the human heroes aren't related yet and there is basically no Nargothrond, which is later a common thread for many of the stories - a prototype shows up in the 'Tale of Turambar' tho complete with half baked prototypes of Orodreth and Finduillas

O boi im not even through yet

#silmarillion #the book of lost tales #history of middle earth #baby reads HoMe

50 notes · View notes

sweater-daddiesdumbdork · 4 years

Text

Doggy Paddle, Doggy Style. Same Thing.

Summary- Starlord x Y/N. Peter Quill finally decides to visit Earth again. SMUT, Nsfw. Written for @official-and-unstable-satan fic off challenge. Challenged by @p8tn0lish. Thanks Babes!

Word Count- 2.3k

“Lets talk about this plan of yours. I think its good. Except it sucks.” Peter told you, his very much tolerable girlfriend, whom at this point were just used to his blunt attitude, and his need for taking over plans. Your hands went to your hips when you decided to question him.

“Whats wrong with visiting Zandar? Its nice, people are friendly, and just cause you cant seem to stay out of trouble there, that isnt my fault.” You happened to like the planet, even though Quill had a perchance to land into trouble, maybe it was the better option to let him chose where you two go. Rocket took Groot and Drax on a bit of a side quest, at your request and a big payout to Rockets account. You werent about to just blow this opportunity to zip around space, as you hoped the the fates, Peter wasnt about to suggest.

“Earth” Peter shocked you, he rarely talked about Earth, and typically you all were all the way across the universe from the vividly blue and green planet. Peter was human, that was his home, but he hadnt been there since Yondu collected him.

“You really want to go to Earth?” You questioned, clearly the hesitation in your voice. You had been asking him for years if he wanted to visit his home planet. And every time it was “No way babes, theres far better places to go” or “maybe after this job, cant pass this up.” and you all would zip to some far off corner as far away as possible.

“Yup, in fact…. we be leaving right now, cause Im the captain.” Stealing a playful kiss, his hand grasping your chin and pulling you into him, his tongue danced over your lips and past your teeth to stroke a needy fucking whimper before smacking your ass, and falling into the seat at the controls, flipping them and a cocky grin was flashed at you as he stated. “How many jumps we got Sexy?”

You to lick your lips after that kiss, it was one that you knew he would be playing off of for hours, little tickles here, nibbles in passing there. Quill was the best kind of frustrating man there was. “Uuuh… 10 jumps.”

“Showtime baby!” With a push forward of a handle on the dash, the ship raced forward and prepared for the first jump. You settle in, feet up on the dash and you reach for a bag of snacks next to the seat, popping them in. “So, where we going on earth?”

He typed in some coordinates and popped open his mouth for you to toss a morsel into, leaning back to catch it, and turned back to the screen. “Fountain Lake… my grandad used to take me there fishing after Mom got sick, give her some peace and quiet. He would bring an old radio along, and we would spend the day out there. Usually I was doing cannon balls off the side, but once in a while he get a pole in my hands.”

You nod, letting his memories take shape in your imagination. You imagined Quill to be a curly haired boy, sun tanned freckles dotting his face and shoulders, much like they do now if you all happen to go to some planet with a bright sun. Maybe the corner of his mouth would flash up in a wide gaped toothy grin, having lost a front tooth. The idea of it made you smile to yourself, and you toss another piece of your snack at him. “You gonna teach me to swim? Cause I dont know how”

“Oh baby, well you are looking at the master.” He winked, and unsnapping his belt, he reached over and collected you, tossing you over his shoulder and retreating to the back. “How about I give you a lesson in doggy style right now.” You two still had a couple hours till you arrived to earth, and Peter set you right on your shared bed, you tugging him down to kiss you, biting his lip with a growl. “Didnt we do doggy style last night? Didnt I pass?”

He spanked your ass at that bite, and his hand grasped your waist, flipping you to your stomach, making you giggle. “Nope you didnt, why were doing this again baby, gotta know at least one technique before we land.” You arch your ass in the air wiggling it, biting your lip. “I think Im pretty good in several styles.” He moved to slide your shirt up your back and over your head, kissing up your spine and biting lightly on the back of your neck. “Well that you are, but its my duty to assure your saftety in knowing at least the most basic techniques after all.”

“Sure whatever you say Quill, if you INSIST” His fingers then hooked in the band of your pants, and slid them down to, you lifted one leg, and then switched to the other till they were off as well. His hands covered your ass cheeks, still a bit red from earlier and kneaded them. “Mmmhhh so pretty bent like this baby.” His teasing from earlier distracted as he admired you. Sliding a hand into the small of your back, he bent you down further till there was a distinct arch, all for him.

You of course are more then ready to feel him slide into you, and you arch your ass back to press into his groin, taking the chance to look over your shoulder at him. “Sure am Starlord” You purr out and wiggle brows. He dips his head and takes a nip at your cheek, leaving teeth marks and making you squeal. Hands working at his belt and yanking his pants down to his ankles, a grasp to his cock slides between the folds, making you whimper feeling his thich head spreading your arousal and flick against your sensitive throbbing nerves, arching from it. “Call me that again.”

“Okay, your such a fucken god damn tease, STARLORD.” You push back, the length of his cock filling between the folds, him rutting behind you, but he was holding back from entering you yet, his hands slid up your sides and around to grasp and fondle your breasts. Teasing, twisting, pulling, you groan in frustration at his cock teasing your folds, and the fact his fucking hands were playing you, you started to whine as he draped over your back, and kissed on your neck, his tongue lapping over the pulse and along your earlobe. “So so so pretty for Starlord, okay whiny baby.”

His cock pushed against your entrance stretching around to accept him as he didnt toy you open earlier with his fingers. It was that tight and burning as he continued sliding into your wet entrance, you would have thrust back to bottom him right away, but he had moved up and grasped your hips to hold your still “Yea, Im well aware from yesterday how impatient you get.” Teasing as you fought for it, and all that wriggling your hips in his hold issued you another stinging swat, this time to your pussy after he finished filling you. Not that made you snap taunt, and your channel to flex around him, drawing the most guttered moan from above you.

So you two both breathed through it, you still flexing and adjusting around him, that arch in your back, angling you Peter insisted on, well it changed the whole sensation. so much fuller then before, the fist time he dragged his cock through your channel to pull out, you moaned at how sensitive you were. His hand grasped your waist, and he started sharp snaps of his hips, and it pushed you right into the mattress, your face driven in and muffling your moans and gasps of his name, and it drove you mad.

“Oh no sweetheart, what is my name?”

Fucking Quill, he was all about driving you to calling out Starlord. His hand wrapped around your throat and tipped your head back, still thrusting into you enough to rock your body, fuck, could he go deeper? He leaned over your back, holding himself inside, the pressure built into maddening quantities, squeezing around him, two can play that game. Fuck, can he stay that seated in you. His hand around your neck, squeezed enough to cut off air, enough for you to see spots, and drive all those sensations further.

“Starlord, STARLORD”

“Good girl…” He muttered against your shoulder, and he released his hold. His fingers slipped between your thighs and pressured that bud, twirling, swirling, pressing as he rubbed, a fire spiraling along your limbs to pool in that nerve he toyed, until you were screaming, gushing yourself around him, and flying high as a mother fucking kite. His thrusts didnt slow any, and that hand he teased you with, he shoved those fingers in your mouth, leaving you to suck on them while he followed through with his own chase, just tasting yourself, fuck. HIs hips continuing to slam him against you, your arousal leaving you all over his groin, erratic and faster, your heightened senses left you gasping and lightly biting on his fingers.

The sound of his balls slapping against your ass left him cursing and you pushed back to meet him, squeezing vice like, enough to drive him over the edge, and you gave the most filthiest satisfied moans, feeling him coat your walls, and push himself in deeper as he groaned against the back of your head. Your limbs started to shake underneath his weight, your words muffled and he slid his fingers from your mouth and rubbed down your side, tipping his head to kiss along your neck. “Quill, your crushing me… “ You mention, and he circles your hand around your waist and tips the two of you over, him the big spoon, curling around you, not slowing down as he massaged your hip and kissed up and down your shoulder before laying back slightly. You had to admit, feeling satisfied, and cocooned in his embrace, you were loathed to check on how many jumps you had left.

“Its on an alarm, we will know when were close.” Just like he was reading your thoughts, he was quick to pick up on what you were thinking.

“Good, cause im not ready to leave you.” you wrap his arm gracing your stomach and hold him there.

“Yea, same here Sweetness” And you can feel how hes still buried in you, his chest pressed against your back and his warm breaths against the back of your neck. You two stay like this for a while, drifting off and on till that alarm beeps. At some point he had rolled to his back, snoring softly, and you shift to the end of the bed, grabbing a pair of panties that were discarded earlier, and your shirt. Slipping it on as you walked to the control panel and silenced the alarm. Below you, taking up the main front of the ship was the sight of earth.

Its beauty never failed to catch your breath, all that vivid blue, dotted with green and tan so scattered, small white wisps swirling in what appeared to be unusual patterns. One half brightly light, and the other, shadowed, seeming to hide from sight, and yet little fireflies of light scattered throughout in the cities. And so full of life, teeming with it, even though from here, you could see none of it short of the electricity scattered. You felt an arm wrap around you and Quill, unnaturally quiet stepped up beside you.

“Beautiful, isnt it?” You say as you lean your hear against his shoulder.

“Yes it is… Yondu never liked coming back here, and it slipped my mind what it looked like. When I left his ship, I was never ready to return.”

“Well… how about we introduce Starlord to home?”

“I would like that very much” His arm tightened around your shoulder and he kissed your temple “Lets begin the descent.”

“Aye aye Cap’n” you teased and the two of you got to work.

The first step off the ship left you in bright sunshine, trees scattered along the edge, partially hiding the ship, the rest covered with a cloaking mechanism. Peter watched you with a smile as you leaned down and untied your shoes, kicking them off, a yank of the socks to push your feet into the grass. It tickled, but the cool blades that released an earthy sent when you pushed your feet to dig in.

“Come on, lets actually swim doggy paddle this time.” He winked and taking your hand, led you down to the beach, careful as you walked against the pebbled shore, the two of you stripped down, with tosses of your clothes and he plunged right in. You on the other hand wadded in, arms over your chest and he swam up to your legs, tugging you to topple against him when he rose out of the water.

“Quill! Your getting me all wet!”

He smirked and holding you tight, started to sink the two of you into the water, till it was just your chins floating on top. “If your swimming, then its bound to get you all wet.” He pulled you out deeper till just your toes could scrap against the murkey bottom.

Tapping your thighs, he kissed your lips, and muttered against them “Trust me, I got you, wrap your legs around me” And you let yourself float a bit, sliding your legs around his hip. “Ready to try that doggy paddle I taught you earlier?” He grinned, and you smacked at his chest lightly, laughing.

God your boyfriend was an idiot on occasion.

@what-is-your-plan-today

#satans ficoff #guardians of the galaxy #peter quill #chris pratt #peter quill x you #writing challenge #actually really love how this came out

31 notes · View notes

captain-aralias · 4 years

Note

Hi, 1,7 and 22 from the fic asks please 💕💕💕

hooray! asks. these are some of the best ones too and it’s 11pm at night... basically, if you want to ask these questions again at the weekend, i will probably answer them better.

1. Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic.

fake relationship, possibly outside of the main ship (that penny/baz prompt today has my name on it. i almost wrote this exact fake relationship into ‘keep calm’ to get the two of them to the cottage, but i removed it because i JUST NEEDED TO GET TO THE PLOT).

in ‘carry on’, my comfort zone is - something about vampires and how sad baz feels about being a vampire, it’ll be about 10k, and will alternate between only the two main characters. at some point someone will point out that baz is rich and maybe he should feel bad about that too. maybe our heroes will have sex.

i’ve said before that i find writing smut hard. i also find it easy, despite that being a contradiction, because you know what the fic is about - it gives it an easy, safe arc, a beginning and an end. so that is helpful - the problem is having to write the actual shagging.

17. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

i’m not a great prose stylist - i’m a writer of dialogue/i always wanted to be a playwright. i’m also pretty good at picking up an mimicking stylistic quirks. so you’ll see what i mean when i say, ‘carry on’ really plays to my strengths.

a few years earlier, i had a great time writing first-person fics in ‘blake’s 7′ fandom where there were basically none. it seemed incredibly frightening before i started (and i still never wrote blake first person, too scary), but actually i loved it.

if you like the things i write for baz, now, a lot of it is probably because i wrote this kind of thing for avon first:

I realised belatedly that Blake had asked this because the hand I'd left on the back of the sofa hadn't stayed where I'd left it. It had crept upwards, and twisted itself into Blake's hair. I must have been toying with his curls. He was right – I must be very drunk. More than I realised. I have no idea how long my hand had been there. I began to draw it back, but Blake seemed to follow it, though I were tugging him towards me, rather than releasing him. By the time my hand had returned to my lap, Blake was most of the way onto my side of the sofa. I opened my mouth to protest, and found myself pushed back by Blake's body as he kissed me. Blake kissed me. Blake kissed me.

I have no idea why he thought this would be welcome, or even whether he’d thought that far ahead. Until that point I had no idea he was attracted to me, or even that he was attracted to men. I am not attracted to men, and I'm certainly not attracted to Blake. He— That is— Well, I can see why some people – some women – might be attracted to him, but it's an objective observation. I can see why women might be attracted to me, and I'm not attracted to myself. Most of the time I don't even like myself. Most of the time I don't like Blake. I certainly don't like him – it's nothing personal. No, it is personal – the regular dislike is, the dislike formed around the fact that a dangerous maniac who endangers my life on a constant basis – but my disinterest in him sexually is not personal. I'd just never thought of him in that light before. Why would I?

So I have no idea why I kissed him back, clutching at his hair with the hands I'd only just managed to remove from his curls earlier.

- Roj Blake and Other Phobias (2015)

a lot of what i wrote for avon is unreliable narrator but very VERY obviously unreliable, so the audience is very in on the joke that he’s kidding himself. for thousands of words. (in this, he is not like baz, who at least knows himself.) this was really good fun, and i think it’s fun to read. i think this kiss is quite sexy (i cut it before we got to that part, but it is) and i also like... even though it’s a cheap device... that i played on quite a famous line for this pairing - have you betrayed me? have you betrayed me? both obviously at the end of the first paragraph, but at other points throughout the bit i quoted where avon tries to clean up after himself even inside his own head by (here) emphasising different bits of the sentence. or correcting himself to make sure he is completely understood...

and obviously he is completely lying.

22. Choose a passage from one of your earlier fics and edit it into your current writing style.

this is my favourite question from the meme. i don’t think i’ll do it justice.

i thought i’d go really early - because all the Blake stuff is still pretty much as i would write it (if not better).

this is one of the last Harry Potter fics i ever wrote: Enslaving Fireflies (2005).

May the first, 1972. “I’m not having any fun,” Peter said for the fifth time, lunging dangerously at another firefly that hovered five feet about his head and almost falling to his death. “Go inside then,” Sirius pointed out mercilessly, as he had done every time Peter had suggested that standing on a roof in the early hours of the morning trying to catch glowing insects was not quite as thrilling as James had made it seem inside the common room an hour ago. Peter scowled in his general direction, but stayed where he was. Sirius smirked and Remus rolled his eyes: after almost a year he, at least, had learnt that it was unwise to let Sirius know he’d won, even if Sirius already suspected as much. There was five minutes of silence and then Peter spoke again. “How many of these things do we need to catch?” “A hundred and fifty,” James informed him for the third time. “Thirty for will, twenty-five for you, fifteen for go, twenty for out, thirty-five for with and fifteen for me and ten for a question mark.” Peter considered this. “And how many do we have?” Remus lifted up the large glass jar that they had ‘borrowed’ from the kitchen that morning and which now held the product of the last hour’s work. “Four,” he said, seriously, “and I think this one’s dead, so that’s three.” “Only another forty-nine hours to go,” James said happily waving his net enthusiastically in the general direction of some more fireflies, “which means, minus the time we have to be in lessons, we should just be in time for her birthday.” Remus put down the jar and set to work again. Another five minutes passed and then Peter said, “I’m really, really not having any fun.”

i dont know if everyone else also had this phase, but at this time (and i was in university by this time - first year, but still) i had this crazy perception about how paragraphing worked. informed, admittedly, by reading books where this does happen.

anyway - the first thing i would do to this would be to put line breaks in between the dialogue.

i chose potter because i thought it would be fun to edit it into first person, given the above/it’s connection with ‘Carry On’... i don’t know if that’s the case, though. er...

1st May 1972 REMUS

We’ve only been at Hogwarts a few months, but I’ve already learned a lot. Like what a bezor is. How to get to the Shrieking Shack without waking up any of my roommates. And that if James Potter says something will be ‘fun’, you should be prepared for both pain and suffering.

“I’m not having any fun,” Peter says for the fifth time as he lunges for another firefly. It’s not the first time that he’s said this and it probably won’t be the last.

“Go inside then,” Sirius says (also not for the first time).

When Peter doesn’t, Sirius grins me - because of course, he knew Peter wouldn’t leave. But another thing I’ve learned is not to tell Sirius he’s right, even though - of course - he already knows he is. The gloating can last for hours.

etc

#my content #carry on

15 notes · View notes

louisfrecklesss · 5 years

Text

LCH [5] | Louisentine

Description: Clementine gets confused with her feelings while she’s spending so much time with Louis, especially after babysitting baby AJ together.

Words: 1,757

Ship: Clementine x Louis

Warnings: make out session

Genre: Fluff, High School AU

A/N: it’s so fucking cold here in London, yes I live in London for those who don’t know. everyone seems to like this fic better than the other one? at least you like one of them because I don’t like my writing at all aH. anyway, I love you all. thank you for reading!

CHAPTERS

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]

It’s been a or two week since Clementine has agreed to this deal with Louis, and not for one second has she thought it was a stupid idea. She could see from hanging out with his friends that they do pick on him a lot, Mitch the most; they’re not bullying him but he is the joke of the group only because he is the lesser of them. Clementine knew that if she was in his shoes she wouldn’t know if she would be as strong as he is.

So, here they all are in the common room of the school. Mitch, Aasim and Marlon sat opposite the couple who were seated on one of the large body bean bags. Clementine sat crossed legged in between Louis legs as he rest his chin on top of her head, her hands held his fiddling with his fingers while she scrolls through her phone with the other.

“When are your friends getting her, babe?” Louis brushes his thumb over Clementine’s hand to get her attention, the girl switches tabs on her phone to their conversation reading the answer for Louis.

“I think they’ll be here in five, I’m not sure to be honest with you.” She looks up at him meeting eyes with him to which he winks at her causing her to look down smiling. Every time he winks, event though he has done it so many times, it still seems to make Clementine blush like crazy.

Clementine meets eyes with Marlon who is vaping the whole entire room up. “Brody?” His eye brows frown at the question before looking towards the door of the room; just in time, Brody walks into the room with Clementine’s friends. Louis knows them but they haven’t all chilled together as ‘friends’.

“Baby!” Brody practically screams as she sees Marlon in the far corner, he opens his legs up on his seat inviting her to sit on his lap. It wasn’t too long before they were all over each other.

Aasim turns away from the couple. “Looks like it came straight out of a porno.” Violet, who came in with the rest of Clementine’s friends, high fives Aasim before taking a seat next to him.

“Oh right, guys, these are my friends. Violet, Sophie an-”

“Ruby!” Clementine is a little shocked when the rest of the boys know who Ruby is. “Darling.”

Ruby giggles when Mitch and Marlon continue to shout her name. “Don’t y’all darlin’ me.”

“You know each other?” Louis questions.

“We always pretend to be sick so we can pay our little Ruby a visit, right Aasim?” Marlon hits Aasim with his elbow a couple times before he is rewarded with a punch on his arm. “Or is it to see that asian guy that is always sick but never fuckign speaks?”

“James?” Ruby questions sitting on the other side of Aasim who physically tenses in his seat, Louis tap Clementine lightly pointing at Aasim before smiling down at her. Clementine saw what he was talking about and mouthed the ways how cute before engaging back in the conversation.

“James is pretty fucking hot.” Clementine states nodding her head along with her fake boyfriend.

“Oh yeah, James has my heart.” Louis clenches his chest and Clementine lifts her hand to high five him behind her. The group just break into a fit of laughs including Aasim himself. It was only recently that Aasim came out about his sexuality so it was hard for him to joke about it still.

“Too bad his gay Clementine.” Mitch adds pointing at the girl who frowns slightly earning a hurt expression from the boy behind her. She tilts her head back looking at him who pecks her lips quickly earning a surprised expression from her, nevertheless, she grins.

Sophie is almost glued to Violet’s side not knowing these people enough to really fit in; Clementine notices this telling her to come sit opposite her which happened to be right next to Mitch. Mitch offers her a small smile to which she returns before saying something to him which Clementine can’t hear, she’s just glad that she has someone to talk too.

“So, party tonight? My house, everyone has to be there because I said so.” Marlon says standing shortly after, he goes round getting everyone number and adding it to a group chat, not too long after everyone receives his address.

Louis admires his girlfriend as he sees her shaking her head softly. “I don’t do parties.”

“Clementine does not do parties.” Violet says to clarify the point that Clementine just made. Louis did not seem too happy about this, he stood up making Clementine fall back onto the bean bag slightly.

“No, princess, you have to come.” Clementine smiles to herself before standing up to placing her hands on her hips.

“Nope, sorry.”

Louis flutters his eyelashes at her, bringing out his puppy dog eyes before moving closer to Clementine. He hopes this works on her because it works on most people, he can even see in the corner of his eye, Violet crumbling and slamming her hand on Aasim’s leg. “Come on Clementine, please.” Clementine looks back at her friend briefly before looking back at him.

“No.”

Everyone boo’ed and complained as Clementine grabs her stuff and Louis hand. “I have to babysit my baby brother, and you’re going to help me.” She addresses the last part of the sentence to Louis who rolls his eyes gently, following behind the girl.

“We all know that’s code for sex!” Marlon shouts as they both start to leave the room.

“Louis is going to have to wait longer than that!”

Lee runs around the house picking up all the mess as well as trying to find his car keys, AJ is screaming in his highchair not wanting his Dad to leave him.

“Daddy, it’s here.” Clementine hands Lee his car keys, he thanks her kissing the top of her head.

“I’ll be back in an hour, I just really have to finish that paperwork sweetpea.”

“I know Dad, go.” She tries to push him out of the house.

“And thank you too, Louis.”

“No problem, Paps.” Louis returns to feeding baby AJ who stops crying once the spoons meets his lips; Louis makes funny faces at the baby causing him to giggle almost choking on his own laugh. Clementine loves watching Louis play with AJ and call her Dad ‘Paps’. It makes it so real, a little too real. But she never bring up the fact that this isn’t real because she wants to feel like it is even when it isn’t.

“Everyone is going to be there, and I have to go because it’s my bro’s party. Open up AJ, woosh.” Louis guides the food into AJ’s mouth before turning to Clementine for a reply.

She sighs before laying down on her couch. “Fine, but I swear to go you can’t leave me alone Louis.”

He turns to her almost jumping up and down. “Of course I won’t babe, thank you so much. You’re amazing. Isn’t she amazing AJ? She’s so great right?”

Clementine smiles at them closing her eyes to rest slightly, without Louis she would have had to babysit AJ all by herself and she’s been so stressed and tired from school she just can’t function. She’s unsure of how long she’s been laying there with her eyes closed but Louis joins her on the couch laying beside her with half of his body on top of her due to the lack of space.

“AJ is sleeping, I put him to bed.”

“I don’t know what I would do without you Lou.” Clementine opens her eyes to meet Louis staring at her; she can see all his freckles up close, even the opens that overlap each other creating and even bigger freckle. Louis could see that Clementine was avoiding his eyes, he wants her to look at him even though she was but not at him. His hand grabs her cheek brushing thumb against it slightly, her eyes flutter shut slowly enjoying the feeling.

“No, look at me.” Louis whispers against her skin, she doesn’t listen at first until he says it again this time in a more demanding tone. As soon as he eyes meet his, she slams her lips against his;. this is the second time that they have shared a kiss during this entire relationship. But it’s the first time that they’ve kissed because they wanted too and not because someone was coming and they had too, like the first time.

Louis’ hand grips her face firmly as he pulls her into the kiss more, the uncomfortable position makes Louis move on top of her instead. Clementine’s arms wrap around his neck pushing him onto her to the point that if it was any further than it would stop her breathing. They pull away from a second only to get air before Louis mouth is on her neck, leaving soft kisses everywhere. A soft breathe of air leaves Clementine’s lips as she bits her lips, one leg moves around Louis waist as she moves him back to her lips.

Clementine’s hands grab onto his shirt pulling him in closer, Louis lets out a small groan feeding more into her lips. She parts her lips asking for more to which he gives her, it wasn’t just a dry kiss anymore as their tongues met each other. Clementine could barely control her breathing before the front door slams open and Louis rolls off Clementine almost as quickly as he rushes towards the kitchen.

Lee walks in with his back turned towards the door trying to get all the shopping bags into the house. “Hey kids, I did some shopping.”

Clementine is breathing heavy trying to compose herself and reply to her father; Louis can see that she is no state to reply muttering the best response he can.

“That’s great Paps.” He shouts from the kitchen taking down a large amount of water from the glass in his hand.

“W-we’re, um, going to a party Dad. Don’t wait up!” Clementine grabs her coat and rushes out of the house. Lee looks to Louis for an explanation, who has a red face, shrugs his shoulders and rushes after Clementine.

55 notes · View notes

juniper-and-lamplight · 6 years

Text

Recent Reads - May 19, 2018

Multifandom--Dirk Gently, Sherlock Holmes, Harry Potter, a bit of Star Trek--and a mix of old and new, as usual. I've already recced some of these fics individually, but life's too short not to be effusive about the things you love, so I'm including them here too <3 Recs under the cut...

The Answer to a Question - @a-candle-for-sherlock - 22k, T, Holmes/Watson

"These are the stories behind the story we know: what really happened to Watson's marriage, and what made him follow Holmes to Reichenbach; what secrets were hidden in the mountains, and what a dead man wrote to the man he left behind." This fic made me Feel Feelings and also made me (almost) late for work.

To Join These Men in Holy Matrimony - A_Candle_For_Sherlock - 10k, T, Holmes/Watson

"Sherlock Holmes is a contradiction, an enigma, a force; at once the most generous spirit and the most self-contained man I have ever known. I've known more of him, I think, than anyone on earth. Yet for years I'd learned nothing about his boyhood, nor his fears, nor his future hopes, nor his father’s name. I never felt it as a lack until I knew he loved me." A moving story about family, forgiveness, self-acceptance, and historical queer marriages.

The Narrator - candle_beck - 8k, M, Holmes/Watson

"Watson is a degenerate gambler, a reluctant romantic, and the least reliable narrator in the history of the written word." A brief, gritty glimpse of my favorite Victorian disasters.

where the falling angels meet the rising apes - @cosmicoceanfic - 26k, T, AU (crossover, Dirk Gently & Discworld)

"A story of Death and the boy who could see him, through the years." In my sadness over finally finishing the Tiffany Aching books, I allowed myself to indulge in Discworld/Dirk Gently fics, and this one was an especially satisfying blend of the two universes. Highlights include Dirk & Bart's friendship, and Farah having a stare-off with Death.

you could bring my healing - cosmicocean - 38k, T, Dirk/Todd, AU (fantasy)

"Where the whole thing takes place in a fantasy world that is not unlike but not quite mostly for legal reasons Ankh-Morpork, Dirk is generally an existential dragon, Todd is a washed up electrical lute player, everyone is kind of awkward and useless except maybe for Amanda, and there is a boatload of fantasy references, plus one (1) Star Wars one." Sheer escapist delight.

Start at the Beginning - @dont-offend-the-bees - 61k, T, Dirk/Todd (AU, fake relationship)

”Y’know, make it up. Pretend to be in a relationship with someone. Can’t be that hard to fake, right?” it was still a stupid idea, but Todd was actually pretty invested in it now. He leaned forward, folding his arms. “C’mon, think about it- you got any other desperate homeless friends?” Takes a wacky ensemble piece and transforms it into a different sort of wacky ensemble piece. Sparing use of fake dating tropes makes this fic all the more enjoyable.

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder: A Lovely Sentiment, But Rarely Applies To Anniversary Gifts - DontOffendTheBees - 7k, M, Dirk/Todd

"In which Dirk and Todd celebrate three years together- but forgot they were supposed to be doing that." Featuring: Todd Brotzman's "funhouse of self-loathing," Dirk & Todd's mutual uselessness, Amanda & Farah's mutual exasperation, winks to Douglas Adams canon, and a clever meta twist.

How We Go Together - ekb112 - 3k, E, Kirk/Spock

"'Have you ever been in love, Spock?' A series of moments in Jim and Spock's relationship." I like a semi-annual spot of K/S. It's a classic ship for a reason, and this fic scratched the itch just right.

Easy As Breathing - electricteatime | @kieren-fucking-walker - 1k, G, Dirk/Todd

"Their days start together. Warm and close, but all elbows and knees, tangled in covers and noses buried into hair. It takes time to swim up through the pull of sleep to break the surface, but when they come to they wake up to each other." A lovely soft distillation of a relationship.

Dress You Up in My Love - electricteatime - 3k, T, Dirk/Todd

“'So, what? Your solution is a pair of skin tight leopard print pants? How is that better than anything I’ve worn?'

Dirk just grins wildly at him, it’s the most like himself he’s looked in days. 'Put them on.'” A fluffy missing scene fic with a wonderful sense of interiority. (How is electricteatime is so good at characterization?!?)

A Flame Undamped - Frayach, read by wench_fics - 5k, 40min, M, Harry/Draco

"A happy ending. Because I can finally imagine one." Hurt/comfort doesn't even BEGIN to cover this sequel to The Price We Pay for Wings. No one does pain and poignancy--and sometimes, healing--like Frayach.

Saturn in Retrograde - gooseflesh - WIP series, M, Dirk/Todd

"As with most things in Dirk Gently's life, things are fine until they're not. A mystery and minor inconvenience for Todd Brotzman takes a terrifying turn when Dirk insists on investigating, and it'll take more than a hunch for them to hold onto to all that they've built." I'm not typically an angst gremlin, but I can't stop reading this WIP, even as the characters' situation worsens exponentially.

Death by Kittenshark - howldax - 1k, G, Dirk/Todd

"'You know,' Dirk says sternly, 'if you murder me, there will be nobody around to feed you.'" Cats (even cats who are also sharks) are gonna cat. Charming and fluffy.

i was born in a summer storm (i live there still) - janeseyre - 10k, G, Farah & Todd & Dirk

"Farah confronts the vestiges of her past as she, Dirk, and Todd travel east to visit her mother. It turns out Farah isn’t as over her father’s death as she thought she was." A deeper look into Farah’s families, both biological and chosen; full of lovely little smile moments and Farah getting the closure she deserves.

The Burning Heart - @may-shepard - 119k, M, John/Sherlock, AU (post s3 fix-it)

"Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own." As is my habit with zeitgeist-y fics, I didn't get around to this one until well after the rest of the fandom, but I'm glad I did. Here's to an assassin plot that's actually plausible and compelling!

The Easiest Way - nntkiwff - WIP, T, Dirk/Todd, Farah/Todd (“basically OT3”)

"'Is that everything?'

'Yes, essentially,' Dirk says, as Todd is saying, 'I don't have magic powers.'" A slow burn WIP, set immediately after the return from Wendimoor, featuring multiple perspectives (including Ken!), in-depth characterization, and some excellent lines, like this one about Farah: “She says all of this as though she is ashamed of being cursed, instead of proud that she blew up an evil warlock.”

Blood Magic and Rebirth (or, The One Where They Are All Feminist Academics) - @notcaycepollard - 1k, G, gen (Harry Potter)

"Moon cups, Luna thinks. Moon cups and blood magic. And she remembers the old itch under her skin, and a music box fluttering into a flock of birds, and wonders just how powerful it could be." This is 1000% headcanon for me now.

A Little Bit Scandalous - @oneprotagonistshort - 1k, E, Dirk/Todd

"Dirk Gently was self-aware enough to admit that he had… a thing. A quirk. One of those idiosyncratic little peculiarities that made up a tiny part of his personality. A kink. He just liked that extra edge; the need to be quiet or someone might hear, the blood pounding in his ears while he stayed hyper-alert for footsteps, the way Todd kissed him so urgently that he lost his breath." I especially appreciated the characterization behind the kink in this one.

Relative Distance - Quesarasara | @itsnotgonnareaditselfpeople, read by @lockedinjohnlock-podfics - 45k, 5hrs, E, John/Sherlock

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end." One of the author's tags on this fic is "What if everyone just acted like a damn adult for a change?", which really clarifies how the fic differs from the later seasons of the show.

it's an institute you can't disparage - @shortcrust - 19k, T, Dirk/Todd

"Todd wakes up beside Dirk Gently four years to the day after having met him realises - abruptly and with categoric certainty - that he wants to do so every day for the rest of his life. What the fuck, he thinks." Hilarious, insightful, and absolutely nails a) the ridiculousness and pathos of Todd Brotzman mired in needless self-doubt, and b) my favorite Ship Dynamic: compatible disasters.

there's cell reception on this widow's walk - strix_alba - 2k, T, Farah/Tina

"In which Tina sort-of-kind-of asks Farah to stay with her in Bergsberg, and Farah kind-of-sort-of wants to say yes." Awkward flirting, Farina styles! Tina mentally describes Dirk & Todd & Farah as a “bunch of hot, uptight weirdos,” which is p e r f e c t.

Just Like That - @sussexbound (SamanthaLenore) - 8k, E, John/Sherlock

"For the first time in what feels like years he WANTS." The perfect combination of unf and feeeels.

Further fic recs | Fic Bookmarks

97 notes · View notes

luftballons99 · 6 years

Text

how alone you are

fandom: Kuroshitsuji/Black Butler

relationships: Platonic Sebastian Michaelis & Ciel Phantomhive (s*baciel shippers don’t touch!)

summary:

“I have no one,” Ciel whispers, shaking. “I have no one.”

“You have me, my lord, until I bring you victory,” Sebastian assures him softly.

Ciel lets out a short, frost-bitten laugh. “Until you claim my soul,” he corrects.

A Faustian pact is a poor cure for nightmares.

tags: Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Torture, platonic fluff, Platonic Relationships, seriously if you ship seba/ciel dont touch this fic please, Trauma, References to Book of Murder and Book of Circus, venting, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Banter

chapters: 1/1

read it on ao3 here or under the cut

(i dont know why but somehow i found myself catching up all the way on the black butler manga after years of not reading it and was hit with the urge to write a fic that 1) explores sebastian and ciel's dynamic as unlikely friends(???) and 2) allows ciel to reach something of an emotional catharsis with the help of the only person (entity?) who, for better or for worse (probably for worse), actually understands him (kinda). they're both incredibly tough characters to write so i hope i at least somewhat got their personalities right? the idea of ciel venting is in and of itself pretty ooc but i suppose if any fanfiction was perfectly in character, it would all be canon, so. yknow.

anyway i cannot stress this enough i do not want any s*baciel shippers in my notifs ok? don't comment. don't even look at this fic. though i guess if youre reading this you already did, in which case, fuck you for not checking/straight up ignoring the tags. point is i dont wanna hear any shippy shit alright keep it classy. ciel's 13, give him a break. he needs a guardian, not a love interest, especially not one thats thousands of years older than him. yikes.)

There are some things - however few - that Sebastian cannot protect him from.

He is content to leave it that way, at first. It’s not his job to be a shoulder to cry on or to chase away nightmares. That was never part of their deal and he wagers that Ciel would prefer to keep it that way. Whether it is because of self-delusion or pride, he will not confide in Sebastian; not when it comes to the scars that lie beneath his skin, invisible but lethal. And truthfully, it is just as well; Sebastian is unsure what he would even do with the information. Handling someone’s emotions without exploiting them is not really his area.

All he needs to do is keep Ciel alive and healthy. All he needs to do is watch the corpses pile up at the foot of Ciel’s throne. All he needs to do is kill some time before his next meal.

And yet all Ciel needs to do to keep Sebastian at his heel is call his name.

And that, as much as it pains Sebastian sometimes, was very much part of the deal.

It has been a while since Ciel has had a nightmare; at the very least, it’s been a while since he’s had one terrifying enough to rip a grating shriek of his butler’s name from his lungs and through the quiet air of the Phantomhive manor. Sebastian has noticed, however, that Ciel has not been sleeping well, regardless. Just this morning, the young lord nearly fell asleep on his feet as Sebastian slipped his silk eyepatch on for him, and then later did fall asleep in his study, drooling into the pages of a book. Something is weighing on his mind, and while usually Sebastian would argue that it’s none of his business what goes on in his little lord’s head, it seems to be becoming his business right now as he rises from his desk and ascends the stairs to answer his master’s call.

He is at Ciel’s door in a matter of seconds and, because no one is around to see it, conjures a tray of warm milk and honey with an elegant flourish of his wrist. He sighs inwardly. He knows that Ciel is still plagued with trauma; has ruined too many gloves wiping vomit off the corner of Ciel’s mouth and reminded him to breathe too many times to forget. Still, he was hoping that his young master would have grown out of his nocturnal panic attacks by now.

After all, a violent flashback while witnessing a child’s murder makes sense to him. A nightmare after a quiet, peaceful evening at home does not.

Regardless, Sebastian dutifully knocks on Ciel’s door three times, signalling his presence. He waits before entering, watching the warm milk he prepared ripple in the flickering candlelight illuminating the hallway. He hopes the young master has enough sense to swallow his pride and invite him in before it gets cold.

“Sebastian?” he hears Ciel call after a moment, his voice raspy and muffled on the other side of his door.

Slowly, Sebastian pushes it open and steps inside. Warm light from the hall spills into the room, a slant of yellow cutting across the young master’s trembling form, tucked deep under the covers. It disappears as Sebastian shuts the door behind him.

“That’s right, my lord,” he replies softly. He balances the tray in one hand as he walks toward the sconce attached to the wall by Ciel’s bed. Knowing that Ciel will want to be able to see him clearly, he pinches the wick of the candle between his forefinger and thumb, and when he lowers his hand, a small flame has already begun to burn at the tip.

Sheets rustle as the young master stirs, emerging from his linen cocoon with a white-knuckled grip on his thick blanket and a terrified stare aimed at Sebastian. Sebastian smiles down at him pleasantly, unfazed by his master’s horror. He sets the tray down on Ciel’s nightstand and wordlessly spoons honey into his cup of milk.

“Nightmare, master?” he asks idly, stirring. Ciel doesn’t answer, still busy panting from lingering panic. “It has certainly been a while since I’ve had to come feed you milk in the middle of the night like a starving pup- “

“You shut your mouth this instant ,” Ciel barks, voice raw and loud and sudden enough to make Sebastian’s hand still and his eyes go wide, his smile slipping cleanly off his lips and leaving his expression blank. He glances up from the tray he brought, meeting Ciel’s multicolored glare. “You forget your place, butler .”

Sebastian releases the spoon he was holding, letting it clink lightly against the rim of the cup. He places a hand over his heart and bows deeply.

“My apologies, my lord,” he says evenly and, because he is sure Ciel won’t be able to see it from this angle, arches an eyebrow at the floor in incredulity. His young master certainly has a shorter fuse than usual this evening. It is true what they say about children becoming agitated when deprived of their nap-time. “Please forgive me.”

He remains still, awaiting the boy’s response. It comes a moment later in a frightened, colorless whisper.

“Come here,” Ciel says, lacking his usual authoritative tone. It’s like he’s reverted back to how he was on that first night, skinny and quivering and sick with fear. The only difference now is that he’s a few inches taller and that instead of smacking Sebastian away and commanding him to keep his distance, he seems to need human proximity - or the closest thing to it he can get his hands on. Sebastian glances up, taking a step forward and kneeling obediently at his master’s bedside.

Ciel regards him fearfully, as if Sebastian might disappear into thin air like smoke from a snuffed out candle. He reaches out a small hand from underneath the covers and curls his nimble fingers into the collar of Sebastian’s shirt. He squeezes and releases the crisp fabric repeatedly, like he needs to make sure both it and Sebastian are really there.

Sebastian remembers something Doctor Arthur said on his first and final visit to the manor; about how, in sleep, the young master looks a little less like an Earl and a little more like a Ciel. He may posture as much as he wishes, but he will always remain that battered little boy sticking his blood-brown hands out from in between the grimy bars of his cage; the boy who was forced to grow up so fast that he didn’t truly grow up at all. The boy who spit upon God and shook hands with the devil. The boy who chose hell over happiness.

“What is it, my lord?” Sebastian asks, curious and amused as Ciel continues to pat down the front of his jacket with frantic hands. They still suddenly, cupped around Sebastian’s shoulders as the young Earl thinks, his face indecipherable. Sebastian looks up at him, waiting patiently.

Ciel’s face crumples like parchment over an open flame. The ominously glowing magenta mark of the covenant in his right eye flickers as he blinks back his tears.

“I’ve had enough,” he whispers, voice trembling - from rage or sorrow, Sebastian is not sure. Rage at his own sorrow, perhaps. His fingers dig into Sebastian’s shoulders, tight like twin mouse traps. If Sebastian were human, he might flinch. “I’ve had enough of this.”

Sebastian places his hand over one of Ciel’s in what he thinks is a reassuring gesture. “Enough of what, my lord?” he wonders.

“I asked you,” Ciel starts, gritting his teeth, “for power. That was our deal, demon.”

Sebastian cocks his head to the side. “Has my service been unsatisfactory?”

Ciel smacks his palm over Sebastian’s mouth. Sebastian blinks. He does not try to pry his master’s hand away, even though it would be easy. He could snap Ciel’s arm like a twig, if he wanted to, and has mused about doing so before. But they have a deal, and it demands that Sebastian never let any harm come to a single hair on Ciel’s head. And besides, it has been a while since Ciel, difficult as he is, has inspired any violent inclinations in him, and that includes now.

“I asked you for power,” the boy continues, “and yet my mind remains weak.” His voice tapers off into barely a whisper, as if he’s still afraid of admitting it out loud - even to someone who already knew. The true horror for Ciel, Sebastian knows, is not so much the torture he endured three years ago, but the fruitlessness of his efforts to take vengeance.

“The dreams do not cease,” he hisses in disgust with himself, “and I will never leave my cage.”

Sebastian is quiet for a long moment. He could say, This is the lightless path you chose. He could say, There is a difference between power and strength. He could say, You are only human. And he could spend the rest of the night with a red, stinging cheek as a result.

Ciel’s hand slips from Sebastian’s face and grips the silky lapel of his jacket. He seems to want an answer, after all.

“My lord, you are overtired,” Sebastian says gently, deciding to hedge his bets. “Please help yourself to the milk I brought; it may soothe your nerves.”

Ciel scoffs, releasing Sebastian’s jacket and hugging his knees. Sebastian stands and attends to the tray he left on Ciel’s night table, letting his hand hover over the cup of milk and feeling satisfied when it warms his palm. It hasn’t gone cold quite yet.

“I’m not a child,” Ciel spits suddenly. If it weren’t for his small stature, anyone else might believe him. He carries the title of Earl and the weight of the underworld with it on his tiny shoulders and not once has anyone but Sebastian seen him buckle under the weight - and even that is a rare thing. He’s proud, he’s greedy. He’s the worst that humanity has to offer, and he’s the best at being so.

He’s thirteen.

“Of course not, my lord,” Sebastian says graciously, though the amusement in his tone is not lost on his master, who snaps his head up and seems to bristle like a cornered cat. “Shall I take it away, then?”

Ciel’s response is an immediate, “No.” Sebastian grins down at him knowingly. “Stop that.”

“Stop what?”

“That smile. It makes me sick.”

Sebastian picks up the cup with one hand and tucks his smile behind the other. “Please accept my sincerest apologies once again, young master,” he says, voice wavering as he tries not to laugh.

“Your ‘sincerest apologies’ don’t do me any good, Sebastian,” Ciel points out hotly, accepting his cup when it is offered to him. “Just do as you’re told.” When he looks up at Sebastian, his eyes are still glassy with poorly-masked fear. His emotional refractory period is not as short as he would like his butler to believe.

Sebastian watches Ciel peer down into his cup with a shaky sigh before taking a tentative sip of from it. After ascertaining that it isn’t too hot, he closes his eyes and tilts his head back as he continues to drink. Eventually, he lowers the cup so it rests in his lap, held in place by his small hands. His eyes remain closed as he takes a steadying breath.

“Are you sure you’re alright, young master?” Sebastian pries gently.

“My emotional state is none of your affair,” Ciel shoots back, eyes still stubbornly shut.

Sebastian’s eyebrow twitches in irritation. Obstinate brat.

“I see,” he says, tone cold. “That must be why you summoned me to your chambers in the middle of the night. Of course. How foolish of me.” He gives Ciel an icy look, patience wearing thin.

(Yes, he is immortal, and yes, he will have an eternity left at his disposal long after Ciel has died, but hours of managing the boy’s schedule while attending to the daily calamities the other Phantomhive servants cause has made him reluctant to waste time. Every minute he spends in Ciel’s chambers is a minute not spent planning their itineraries for the coming day or preemptively preparing himself mentally for his coworkers’ blunders.)

On that very first night, Ciel ordered him to never lie. Sebastian had figured out quickly that the little lord would not afford him the same luxury.

Ciel gapes up at him, appalled. “ Excuse me,” he starts indignantly, “Since when do I owe you an explanation for my orders?”

“I would never dream of expecting such a thing,” Sebastian assures him, but they both know it’s insincere. “I simply wished to express my concern for…”

He lets the statement taper off into silence when he realizes what he’s trying to say, his jaw going slack before his mouth snaps shut.

Ciel’s eyes shoot wide open before narrowing into skeptical slits, luminous amethyst and candle-lit sapphire shimmering through his lashes. “Your concern for what?” he asks, insistent but wary.

Sebastian considers his master for a moment, thinking. So much for hedging his bets.

“...Your well-being,” he answers finally, and it isn’t until the words slip off his tongue that he tastes their truth. He blinks.

Ciel’s brows pinch together, the eyes underneath searching Sebastian’s face like a bandit looting a vagrant’s corpse. He flounders. Finally, in a test of Sebastian’s meaning, he says, “Your concern is unwarranted. As you can see, I am not injured.”

And it is true - Ciel is healthy as can be; he hasn’t suffered so much as a papercut in over a month. And it has been, by all accounts, a quiet, peaceful evening.

And yet Sebastian has not felt at ease ever since he heard his master scream.

“Indeed,” he says thoughtfully, brows knitted, “but it is not an injury that had you calling my name.”

Ciel’s eyes widen as he looks up at Sebastian, stunned. “I’m fine now,” he insists after a moment, suddenly impatient.

“‘Fine’ has variable definitions,” Sebastian points out and Ciel rolls his eyes, “None of which I would use to describe your current - “

“So what?” the young master demands, incensed, the very foundations of the manor Sebastian built him quaking at the sound of his voice. Sebastian closes his mouth. “I’m alive. That is all that has ever mattered to me.” Ciel’s thin fingers press tighter around his cup of milk as if he’s trying to crush the delicate, flowery design painted on its exterior into oblivion.

What outstanding hypocrisy. Sebastian has had enough.

“You,” he begins in a rough sigh before dropping into a crouch in front of his master, unimpressed, “are quite the nuisance.”

Ciel gapes, immediately raising one hand high. Sebastian’s arm snaps forward before the young lord’s palm can make contact with the side of his face and squeezes his brittle wrist tight.

Ciel flinches, fear striking his features like lightning, and Sebastian is surprised when he doesn’t feel satisfaction at the sight. When did that change? He loosens his grip, but does not let go.

“How dare you ,” Ciel spits, outraged. Tears blur and distort the smoldering mark of their covenant. Still, he swallows a hiccup and growls, “You are trying my patience, Sebastian.”

“What a coincidence,” Sebastian remarks, feigning enthusiasm. “You are trying mine.”

The dam breaks. “You insolent - ” Ciel begins in an angry sob, face twisted in agony, but cannot seem to struggle to the end. His gem-like eyes overflow, his princely nose leaks, his heart-shaped face is blotchy and red. In this moment, he is no Earl.

Why, then, should Sebastian masquerade as his butler?

“It is your stubborn refusal to confront your emotions that results in these puerile night terrors of yours and my subsequent subjection to your misdirected, hysterical outbursts,” Sebastian informs him strictly, red eyes cold. Ciel, through slime and salt water, manages a powerful glare and a snarl. Sebastian is undeterred. “Therefore, if there is so much as a ghost of a chance that you airing your grievances now will result in even a single night more uninterrupted by this nonsense, I believe it is in our best interest to take it, wouldn’t you agree?”

Ciel begins to wrench his wrist out of Sebastian’s grasp and Sebastian allows it, even though he anticipates the sharp slap to his cheek that follows. He sighs loudly in annoyance and looks at the floor, listening to the boy in front of him sniffle and hiccup pathetically. He takes a moment to compose himself; to let the flicker of anger in his chest to go out, eyes falling shut.

He does not anticipate Ciel’s arms hooking around his neck in a distraught embrace.

Sebastian tries to remember the last time he was held.

It was probably by Mey-Rin; she trips over her skirt or her shoelaces or other people’s shoelaces or the floor at least twice a day, and it is often Sebastian who catches her before she falls and breaks her nose - or worse, the dishes she carries. And though the encounter did not leave much of an impression on him, he did sleep with Beast to find information about her benefactor.

This, however, is obviously, markedly different. This is his young master. This is a child desperate for emotional reprieve. This is a little boy in need who would rather die than admitting so.

Carefully, Sebastian places his hand on Ciel’s head, cautious and curious as to how it feels to comfort someone he’s actually invested in. He smooths over Ciel’s tousled dark hair; feels tears seep into the collar of his shirt; thinks vaguely about all the laundry that’s piled up this week. Ciel shivers against him pathetically, muffled whimpers spilling from his lips into Sebastian’s shoulder, and Sebastian keeps stroking his head the same way he’d stroke a cat’s - sans the enamored cooing.

“I hate this,” Ciel grits out spitefully, yet holds Sebastian tighter. Sebastian chuckles softly, amused by the contradiction. Ciel always has been a walking, crawling, squirming juxtaposition.

“If I may be so bold, my lord,” Sebastian offers quietly, “You need this.”

Ciel responds with a pitiful hiccup. Sebastian lifts the hand not occupied with Ciel’s hair and runs it down his back in slow motions that he can only guess are soothing.

“I have no one,” Ciel whispers, shaking. “I have no one.”

Sebastian almost asks, I thought you had no need for emotional attachments? , but manages to restrain himself. Now is not the time for banter, and he’s already been slapped once tonight.

“You have me, my lord, until I bring you victory,” Sebastian assures him softly.

Ciel lets out a short, frost-bitten laugh. “Until you claim my soul,” he corrects.

Sebastian was not expecting that. They do not discuss that part of their deal often, despite both knowing its inevitability. Strangely, the pang of hunger he feels in his core at the reminder is accompanied by something else - different, but equally as painful. While hunger leaves him hollow, this seems to fill him past capacity. He is being torn apart.

“Victory first,” he vows after a quiet moment, suffocating his feelings like he would a kitchen fire. “You have my word, sir.”

Ciel’s fingers dig into Sebastian’s back as he buries his leaking nose deeper into the crook of his neck.

“How cruel,” he whispers bitterly, “that the same hand protecting me is the one by which I will die.”

Sebastian’s hand stills mid-stroke of Ciel’s ducked head. He had never thought about it like that. Ironic, yes. Poetic, yes. But never ‘cruel.’ When he thinks about it, he finds the word fits just as well.

“You chose this, my lord,” he reminds the boy and himself, but still does not feel absolved.

“Indeed,” Ciel agrees and holds Sebastian tighter. He is never this clingy unless his life is in danger. Sebastian supposes that, in a sense, it is.

“Now, now, sir,” he chuckles, slowly leaning out of Ciel’s embrace. It is late, they have a busy day ahead of them, and one of them has to be the first to stop playing house. “I have kept you awake for far too long already.”

Ciel’s arms loosen around Sebastian’s neck as he pulls away, though his hands remain clasped at its base. His eyes are swollen red, his cheeks flushed and glittering with moisture to match. Sebastian tuts lightly and shakes his head as Ciel sniffles, reaching into his pocket and producing a handkerchief. He rubs the boy’s cheeks and nose clean, suddenly rocked by the memory of the last time he had to do this - just under three years ago. Ciel was ten and still readjusting to life outside of cages and cult rituals. It took a while before he started bothering to wipe his mouth after a glass of milk or his nose after a sneeze, and it was Sebastian who would remind him by example.

Once again he is filled with that emotion he cannot place. Confusion wrinkles his brow and parts his lips. Ciel seems to notice and gives him a curious look, but before he gets the chance to investigate, Sebastian is pulling his handkerchief away, slipping it into his pocket, and rising to his full height. Ciel’s mouth, which had fallen open when he meant to begin his interrogation, shuts silently. Sebastian cannot decide if it is a relief or not; that Ciel isn’t prying.

(He wonders - long after tonight - what Ciel does not say.)

When Ciel finally does speak, it is to interrupt Sebastian’s movement to extinguish the candle bathing the room in soft orange light with a firm, “Wait.”

Sebastian tilts his head questioningly, retracting his hand. “Master?”

“The light,” Ciel says quietly, tired eyes drooping as he looks up at his butler; his confidant; his murderer. “I like it. Don’t put it out until after I’ve fallen asleep.”

Sebastian smiles, deciding it is safe to tease once again. “The esteemed Earl Phantomhive, unable to sleep without a nightlight. How sweet,” he cooes, a hand over his heart. Ciel narrows his eyes at him. “Shall I tell you a bedtime story while I’m at it, my lord?”

“I dare you,” Ciel challenges him irritably. Sebastian knows better than to accept. He grins and watches Ciel’s eyes fall shut.

“Then I take it I am not yet permitted to retire for the evening?” he asks with a put-upon sigh.

“Do you even sleep?” Ciel wonders flippantly in a yawn that he does not bother to cover with his hand. He rolls onto his back and pulls the covers up to his chin.

Sebastian is surprised, but not put-off, by his master’s interest. “No, sir,” he says, “however, like you, I do require rest.” He pauses, chuckling. “Though obviously not as much as humans do.”

Ciel snorts. “Obviously.”

“Well then, master,” Sebastian begins pleasantly, standing with his back to the wall adjacent to Ciel’s bed, “I will remain by your side until you fall asleep.” And until the day where you do not wake up again.

Ciel hums in acknowledgement, rolling onto his side away from Sebastian and curling into a crescent shape against the mattress. Sebastian, although - or perhaps because - his master can’t see him, allows himself a genuine smile. There will be no more nightmares tonight and, hopefully, for the foreseeable future.

“Sebastian,” he hears the young lord say suddenly and glances up to the back of his head, dark against the soft white of his downy pillows.

“My lord?” Sebastian prompts softly, standing at attention.

There is a long pause before Ciel speaks again - so long that Sebastian wonders if the boy has finally succumbed to sleep - but just when it seems like the conversation is over, Ciel breaks the silence once again with a firm, albeit sleepy, “You did well today.”

Sebastian blinks. He has lived a long time; has seen many things and met many people. He is not easily stunned.

Hearing those words from his master, however, will shake him every time.

I invoked your ire to the point where you slapped me, part of him - the same part that got him slapped, incidentally - wants to remind the boy, but he keeps his quip to himself. They have gone back and forth enough for one night. Surely there is no harm in accepting the gift of his master’s acclaim.

“My lord, I am most honored by your praise,” he tells him, smiling in gratitude and pride. “If I may offer my own - “

“Oh, spare me. All I did was ruin your shirt with my stress-induced optic and nasal secretions.”

Sebastian grimaces at Ciel’s wording. “Now, my lord, surely there is a more graceful way to - “

“Just accept the compliment without patronizing me, Sebastian,” Ciel huffs, frustrated, and rolls over to meet his butler’s eyes. He points at him decisively. “That’s an order.”

Sebastian, still smiling, sighs and raises his hands in surrender. “As you wish, young master,” he concedes.

With a final nod and fluff of his pillow, Ciel settles under his covers. When his eyes shut this time, Sebastian knows they will not open again until morning. He shakes his head, leaning back against the wall with crossed arms as he watches the young lord’s thick covers rise and fall with each of his steady breaths. When Sebastian is sure Ciel is asleep, he extinguishes the light. The room plunges into the comforting darkness of night, softened by milky rays of moonlight filtering in through the window.

Sebastian collects the tray and dishes he brought, being sure not to make a sound when he lifts them up from Ciel’s nightstand. He glances down at the boy over his shoulder before making his way out of the room, remembering his words - You did well today, Sebastian.

A bittersweet smile forms on his lips as he pushes Ciel’s door open. With one last look back at his master’s sleeping form, Sebastian whispers, “As did you, my lord,” and slips out of the room.

#kuroshitsuji #black butler #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #fanfiction #fic #my fic

134 notes · View notes