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randomfoggytiger · 1 year

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Never Again: An Intensive Essay

This post is its own project, as I felt it necessary to approach 'Never Again' with a lens divorced from my Personality Type post (found here-- more in depth and with play-by-play screenshots.)

Without further ado, here we go~

Loss of Control-- the Cause, or the Symptom?

‘Never Again’ is, on its surface, about three people losing control over their lives-- Ed Jerse has lost his family in divorce, Scully has lost herself to the quest, and Mulder is losing Scully as she questions the decisions in her life. But the truth lies one layer deeper-- why DID they lose control of their lives? What was the mechanism? And that is the episode's true, nefarious 'villain': fear.

Fear, the Disrupting Mechanism

Scully contemplates many things this episode: a rose petal left on a grave, Mulder’s nameplate on his desk, endless lines, and her life. She has given her natural loyalty and tireless devotion to a cause that could save real lives and fulfill her by the same token. The true reason for her devotion, however, was not to the cause, but to its seeker: Mulder. Every loss she has suffered, every small victory she gained, and every fear she faced was at his side and with his strength. It is not the journey that is the never-ending line, because she always gets roped back in when Mulder asks her to (this episode, Elegy, The Ghosts That Stole Christmas, Dreamland I and II, etc.) It is her relationship; particularly, that she has chosen Mulder and his quest above all things-- the respect of her peers, a life, her family, even her fertility-- but that he hasn't chosen her the same way.

In The Jersey Devil, Scully stated to her friend Ellen: “He’s a jerk. ...He's not a jerk. He’s obsessed with his work.” Since then, Mulder and she have grown undoubtedly closer-- their reassignment, her abduction, her coma and recovery, Donnie Pfaster, his father’s death, her sister’s death, his mother's stroke, and many other experiences-- and Scully has aided and abetted willingly all his schemes, teasing and flirting each step of the way. In Home, Mulder set himself up as a candidate for her Uberscullies, and even leaned into her inquiry. There was fertile ground for a more nuanced discussion of their relationship after the Peacock horrors unfolded, with a more somber Mulder and vindicated Scully.

But then The Field Where I Died happened. Scully’s unrivaled closeness to Mulder was shaken by his attachment and grief over the loss of his professed ‘soul mate.�� Equilibrium was restored by the time Mulder paid a visit to Russia, Scully was incarcerated for contempt of court, and John Lee Roche was shot in his undeserving head; but the doubt remained. Scully's priority has always been Mulder; but she's afraid he doesn't return that devotion.

Missed Signals

Scully gazes at the rose petal on the grave because it is a physical marker of the love someone has for the deceased, conquering even death. She takes it with her, simultaneously contemplating it and the nameplate on Mulder’s desk. The realization that there is no marker of her presence in Mulder’s life leads her to question her life, this quest, her loyalty-- but not to realize, quite yet, what the true root of the problem is. That realization is after her skirmish with Jerse.

Mulder is whirring around the office in preparation for his forced vacation; but is pulled up short when Scully asks him why she doesn’t have a desk. He makes a flippant but sincere remark before redirecting her to a case to do in his absence. Scully debunks its importance, unspooling the informant’s story good-naturedly and trying to avoid her brewing emotions... until Mulder uses that ‘assignment’ word again. Scully balks at this, flinging out a remark not dissimilar to her “macho man” accusation in Syzygy.

Offended, Mulder steams that his files mean everything to him, stating: “You were just assigned here.” This affirms Scully's seed of doubt: that she was assigned and appreciated only for her value to the work (it's not until Fight the Future that this is resolved) and not for something more.

“And it’s become mine.”

Mulder screeches to a halt, his bravado and irritation disintegrating into a puff of smoke-- "You don't want it to be?"-- so suddenly and shakily that Scully tries to soften the blow, too late. Mulder’s face crumples-- physically folding in on himself-- blindsided and fearful of what she'll say next.

Scully tries to explain that she feels like she's lost herself while everyone else has moved on: “...while my own life is… standing still.” She gives a tight, false huff of laughter (an outward sign of the raging, internal panic) because she doesn't know what's wrong. Scully believes she knows it’s being trapped by “the endless line”; but if that were the case, she wouldn’t stick with it for as long as she has or continue to do during Never Again and the rest of her time with the FBI. The lesson she learns is that the never-ending line isn't the quest: it's her relationship with Mulder.

Mulder is a man driven by his passion for solving the endless puzzles laid out to lead him to and away from the Truth. He is also a man that has a miniscule support system, and no one else on the planet to understand him. Scully in one fell swoop sweeps his feet from under him, causing him to panic and search for the quickest solution he can find. He deduces incorrectly that maybe he’d gotten under her skin too much lately; and excuses himself from the room and her life as quickly as possible. To Scully, this is the final nail in the coffin of what she assumes is her worth in Mulder's life.

Escaping Confusion in the Arms of the Confused

Scully tries to escape from these feelings by pouring herself into the assignment. She believes her struggle is with the work, and doggedly pursues it to try to rediscover her drive for it. This leads her to Ed Jerse; and her interest is peaked when he makes obvious flirtatious overtures and invites her to dinner. She leaves the interaction feeling better without realizing it's because someone expressed interest in her rather than a job well done.

And then Mulder calls. She is genuinely happy he tracked her down; but the interactions spirals when Mulder refocuses his attentiveness to her case. When he expresses surprise and disapproval in how she wrapped it up (accidentally coming across as chastising when he was just confused and needing a reason), Scully becomes offended. Her anguished feeling has returned; but the satisfaction doubles back when Mulder jealously pokes at her having a date. She hangs up, leaving him to stew.

From here on out, Scully is pursuing that satisfying feeling. Her actions are guarded but curious as she is slowly coaxed to Ed's apartment, then to the crummy bar, then to the tattoo parlor, and finally back to Ed's apartment again. With Jerse, she believes she is finding happiness through breaking the "authority" Mulder has on her life; but what she has done is simply replace him with Ed, centering her face on Ed's reactions at each of her revelations and new experiences. Her date, meanwhile, is feeding both of their self-delusions by giving Scully too much overeager attention and sponging off the bit she gives in return.

The tattoo: Scully gets an ouroboros for obvious reasons laid out in the episode. But she gets it placed directly on her lower back where Mulder rudders and steadies her. This was intentional on her part; but it now serves two mortifying purposes: a continual reminder of her big mistake, and a reminder that she didn't know herself at all.

It's not until Ed Jerse self-destructs that Scully can see clearly her actions for the first time, and why she did them, and why they are different than Ed's. Jerse's fear of women-- how his wife destroyed his life, how Betty 'continues' to destroy it-- tore apart his mind long before the tattoo could or did. And Scully realizes the solution she had sought from him were the things she wanted from Mulder but believed she would never have: a crummy bar with Ed, a tattoo with Ed, a night with Ed. That is why, when the dust has settled and she is back to the office, that Scully is at more of a loss than she had started... because, while she could get a life, she wants Mulder to be a part of it (poking at his lack of one since The Jersey Devil; and continuing to hint about the possibilities from Home onward.)

The Basement Redux

Scully's depressed and teary spirits are quickly shoved aside when Mulder arrives. She refuses to engage; and his rambling gets worse and worse as he realizes the canyon has widened. His attempts at humor-- "You look a lot better than you did in the hospital", "And congratulations for making a personal appearance in the X-Files for the second time”-- fall flat, and his anguish is visible when he turns to deliver "It's a world record." (See this post for play by play.)

He bridges the gap while reading Ed Jerse's medical diagnosis; giving Scully time to march to her chair. But in the middle of his “better late than never, huh?” he abruptly stops when she reaches for the dried-up rose petal. Launching from the chair, Mulder stretches, tenses, rolls his head, and hunches up his shoulder in another mad quest through his files for a last-minute distraction. He is finally forced to admit defeat: “All this because… because I didn’t get you a desk?”

Scully is shocked he actually asked; and her face softens at his vulnerable voice and confused, hurt expression. She explains in Mulder-speak: “Not everything is about you, Mulder. This is my life.”

The great misunderstanding of Scully: she is NOT drawing a circle around herself, enforcing boundaries that Mulder can never cross, cutting him out and keeping him from ruining her perfect, private world. What she wants, what she needs, is for him to acknowledge that her loyalty and steadfastness and courage and faithfulness is reciprocated-- beyond the quest, beyond the Truth. That "that unspoken" she feels is felt by him, too.

She gets her acknowledgment; but there is no comfort in it.

Mulder’s unspoken “Yes, but it’s become mine” dies on his lips as Scully’s meaning dawns on him.

Mulder freezes as he realizes two things at once: Firstly, that Scully wants them to stop circling the drain of their relationship. What she had been seeking in Jerse wasn't a rejection of him-- it was him. But secondly-- he realizes that he can’t take that next step. He at least tries to repeat his confession-- sucking air in, moving his lips-- but can't get the words out.

Scully cocks her head, queuing him to continue, wanting him to continue. But when Mulder's second attempt fails, and his mouth permanently closes, Scully realizes her two things: Mulder understands her message; and reciprocates but can't return it. At least not yet. Her gaze falls once again, her hopes crushed. For all that she has "gained", Scully is still on that endless line, looping around and around in perpetuity.

To sum this disaster up:

Scully is daily motivated by the journey. Her sense of worth to the world is why she left medicine for the FBI; and every day she makes a fulfilling difference. The never-ending line that she is trapped in befuddles her at first, wondering if she's lost herself and her motivations because of a discontent she is deeply feeling. When Mulder walks out on her, Scully misreads his intentions as abandoning her to his bidding; and resentment begins to build. Work was what fulfilled her before, so she tries to do it again; and, by solving the case Mulder "assigned" her, she runs into Jerse and his crumbling issues. Ed's problems seem to mirror hers, and she is interested and hopeful enough to try his solutions. They fall apart; Ed falls apart; and Scully's thoughts of herself and her motivations fall apart with them. She realizes what she truly needed was Mulder, and that Mulder cannot give her what she wants.

Is Leonard Betts or Memento Mori Next?

Setting aside Morgan, Wong, and Gillian's insistence that Never Again took place before Leonard Betts and is unattached to the cancer arc, let's analyze Scully's actions to deduce a timeline.

It is appealing to place Never Again after Leonard Betts because of Scully's contemplative, dour mood after taking the flower from the gravestone. However: if Never Again were simply a joy ride to express that she'd thrown caution to the wind to LIVE, then it would prove she'd already given up. Then the message Memento Mori would have been useless; because that is when she grapples with her mortality and hopelessness and rises above it; but not before denying there's a problem and refusing to admit she's dying FIRST. Scully cannot both recklessly give up in one episode and be horrified that she is slowly dying the next. (Not to mention her real, fearful concern over the ergot poisoning she and Ed could be suffering from.)

Finally, if this episode were about Scully's reckless abandon because of her cancer (and not about her own fears and priorities), then she wouldn't have needed to be coaxed by Ed each step of the way-- her motel, his apartment, the crummy bar, the tattoo parlor, and back to his apartment. She would have simply given up and jumped on each new opportunity handed her way.

But does it make sense to place it before Leonard Betts?

Yes-- it's the perfect case to pull Scully from her doldrums. Most of Leonard Betts is brimming with medical jargon and theories; and Mulder relies heavily on her expertise to jump from one conclusion to the next while teasing her lightheartedly and taking the time to listen, proving her value. Not only that, but he's just as flummoxed through most of the episode, which gives her ample time to show off here and there. Scully feels valuable again-- which makes the ending even more tragic. She knows Mulder loves her but can't reciprocate, laying to rest the fear of The Field Where I Died; but now she is afraid of terminal cancer in lieu of her MUFON sisters. Knowing Mulder relies on her in ways that no one else can fill and would have that support ripped away (and her own life with it) is a gut punch of epic proportions.

Thanks for reading!

Enjoy!

#txf #Never Again #An Intense Essay #S4 #mine #analysis #xf meta #meta #xfiles #x-files #the x-files #txf meta #Scully #Mulder #Ed Jerse #Leonard Betts

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aho-dapa · 9 months

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hiraeth

part 36 of me explaining my fics rather than writing them

So, this is different from my rewrite lore, just a tamlin week fic I haven't written yet

TW: horror elements, gore mention, canon typical violence??, cannibalism because fae eat humans

Set UTM and Feyre goes after Tamlin like canon except it doesn't follow canon at all

Basically mashes ACOTAR and ACOMAF together

Feyre does her typical 'I love Tamlin, give him back to me' and Amarantha says 'sure, but kill these three fae first'

Sad, because Tamlin knows whats up but can't say anything because he's bound by Amarantha magically after the curse cemented itself

The fae are covered head to toe in black and mourning veils and cannot speak or move (which is formal wear in fae sacrifices)

Feyre kills them with an ashwood dagger and Amarantha basically orders Tamlin to go stand near Feyre because she 'gave' him to her (AKA Amarantha actually having the trickster traits of the fae and doesn't just make moves that could lead to her downfall plus explains the literal language of bargains)

Amarantha then reveals that the three hooded figures are actually Nesta, Elain, and Papa Archeron because Amarantha already had spies in the Spring Court (so she discovers that Tamlin and Rhysand were actually working together to stop her when Rhysand told her that Feyre was actually Clare Beddor)

AKA Tamlin and Rhysand have always been friends and were playing the long con ever since Amarantha came to Prythian because Tamlin warned Rhys about her

AKA Tamlin never betrayed Rhys, Tamlin's father killed Rhys's sister because she was Tamlin's mate (plus political shenanigans where Tamlin was already betrothed to Amarantha) and Tamlin actually orchestrated the death of his family as revenge (in this timeline, Tamlin's mother died young and he had bonded with Rhysand's mother as well)

Tamlin holds and comforts Feyre because that's all he can do at the moment

Amarantha then declares this her coronation and ascension ceremony with three humans as sacrifice and declares herself the Dark Mother

Amarantha then reveals the Cauldron and resurrects Nesta, Elain, and Papa Archeron using this moment to solidfy herself as someone who can control life and death

She then also resurrects both Jurian and her sister Clythia using more fae sacrifices because they don't have whole bodies

Because she's not yet done with her performance, she has Tamlin 'sit and stay' like a dog as she orders the Attor to tear Feyre limb from limb as he watches unable to do anything

Amarantha then orders a celebration feast and orders everyone to celebrate their new divinity

She also orders Tamlin to clean Feyre up and feed Feyre to Amarantha as even more punishment for not giving into her

Tamlin goes up to Amarantha and the Cauldron, but instead of giving Feyre to her, he put her remains in the Cauldron and uses himself as a sacrifice to bring her back to life as 'all things that have been Un-Made must once again be Made, and things Made must be Un-Made in the Cauldron'

At this, Feyre comes back to life but not as a human, but as a beast that begins to attack everything in sight and she eventually kills Amarantha, releasing everyone from her curse and rule

At this, Feyre and Clythia fight but everyone else joins in so Clythia runs away with Amarantha's body to Hyburn by winnowing

Thus, this begins a whole new story where Rhys never SAed Feyre and was actually working with the people around him to bring down Amarantha

This also means that Feyre doesn't have the other High Lords' powers but she does have Tamlin's shapeshifting ability because of his sacrifice

Feyre ends up permanently staying as a beast out of trauma, grief, and guilt (and is helped later on by Rhys because he's the only one that can communicate with her via telepathy)

Jurian, Elain, and Papa Archeron remain human but changed by the Cauldron

Nesta had actually brought herself out of Cauldron and did the same as canon and took from the Cauldron so that's why she has the appearance of a fae

So Prythian now has to go against both the King of Hybern and Clythia instead of just the KoH

And so this is where I reveal this is actually a TOG and ACOTAR crossover fic where the Cauldron also acts as a Wyrdgate and Tamlin was actually sent to the world of TOG

Also small TOG rewrite that doesn't follow the canon of TOG / also CCITY doesn't exist in this because I haven't read it yet

Currently planned (crackship) pairings, lemme know what you think:

Tamlin / Gavriel / Maura

Rhys / Cassian / Feyre

Azriel / Fenrys

Gwyn / Nox

Balthazar / Eris

Amren / Nesta / Varian

Mor / Elide

Emerie / Ressina

Elain / Kashin / Yrene

Lucien / Arghun

Nesryn / Sartaq

Tarquin / Papa Archeron

Cresseida / Jurian

Rowan / Aelin

Nehemia / Pelor

Aedion / Chaol / Dorian / Kaltain

Lysandra / Manon

Lorcan / Endymion

canon has no power here

#acotar crackship #tog crackship #anti sjm #always anti sjm #dapa writes #I literally paired everyone up because I was so intrigued by the possible pairings #pro tamlin #the fic title is hiraeth #acotar era

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alleykatart · 3 months

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Three words: Hot. Himbo. Werewolves. (Werewolves and werecats and witches, oh my!)

World building and character summaries below, along with a bit more art!

From left to right:

Kyle Johnson: Human. He/Him. Gay. Gym twink with a crush. Went home with Rhys and ended up pulled into the world of the supernatural while trying to juggle his college coursework. Architecture major. Happy go lucky, down for an adventure, often bites off more than he can chew.

Rhys Whitethorne II: Werewolf, Born. He/Him. Bisexual. Older cousin of Jason Whitethorne, but mostly content to let his little cousin lead. His father's Jason's father's little brother, meaning Jason "stole" his "birthright" to lead the Whitethorne Pack. Had a nasty habit of stealing or ruining things that were important to Jason when they were kids. Toys, books, friends, and at least one lover. Now he runs a gym on the first floor of an old warehouse Jason is renovating. Still annoyingly competitive with everyone, but especially his cousin... but also trying to get over his own bullshit. Trying.

Mercy Lawless: Witch, Fae Blood. She/Her. Heteroflexible. Orphaned granddaughter of the Witch Queen of New York, Mercy Lawless and Jason Whitethorne were pushed toward each other from a young age, in an attempt to secure peace between the Witches and the Werewolves. They had an on and off teen sweetheart situation, but neither truly felt a romantic spark, and merely continued the pretense of dating as an excuse to hang out as friends. Easily the smartest person in the Pack, fiercely loyal to her friends. Still working her way out from under her grandmother's thumb. College student going into Occult Studies.

Jason Whitethorne: Werewolf, Born. He/Him. Pansexual. Eldest son and heir of real estate tycoon Owain Whitethorne, current Alpha of the Grand Pack of New York. Jason is the wearer of the Fangs of the First Alpha, which enhance his wolf form while also making him a bigger target for other wolves seeking to prove themselves or claim the artifact for themselves. Business major. Sometimes too direct and harsh, Jason holds himself to an impossible standard he'd never dream of holding anyone else to, wanting to prove he's good enough. He and Mercy have become the closest of friends, their bond far closer now than when they tried dating, enough that he's let her channel the Fangs of the First in the past.

Soo Park: Werecat, Turned. He/Him, Tentatively They/Them. Gay. Orphaned in a horrific "wild animal attack" at 17, the only child of Ha-Yun Park and her husband, John. Taken in by his maternal aunt, Soon-Yi and her girlfriend, Carmilla. Knowing it damn well wasn't a wild animal, Jason and Mercy helped the nerdy, awkward Soo through his clumsy first steps into the supernatural world, and the grief and loneliness after his parents died. With their friendship, Soo blossomed, came out of his shell (much to everyone's horror and delight) and learned to control his new abilities... mostly. After almost a year of waiting for Soo to figure out his feelings, Jason finally made the first move... that Soo only wasn't willing to make because he assumed Jason was straight and just "really sweet" to let Soo hang all over him all the time. Art major. Snarky, overly fond of swear words, utterly clueless that his aunt's girlfriend is an ancient vampire. It's not like he's ever smelled one before, after all. Tends to exaggerate confidence he doesn't quite feel.

Kane & Zane Li: Werewolf, Born. He/Him. Pansexual. Human father, werewolf mother, the twins were raised in the Whitethorne pack and are virtually inseparable, considering Jason to be their unofficial brother. What they lack in height and wits, they more make up for with their big... hearts and their desire to help others. Besides, if they need a witty comeback, they can just ask Mercy, who's often seen with one twin on each arm. Kane is secretly a gamer nerd who spends his Thursday nights with Soo and Kyle playing tabletop games, because they don't fight enough monsters in their real lives. Zane keeps his twin's secret, and hangs out with the Whitethorne cousins and Mercy on Thursday nights. Kane harbors an unrequited crush on the hunter, Pixie. And honestly, who can blame him?

Bonus images~

(Soon-Yi and Carmilla, who definitely is not an ancient vampiress with a penchant for beautiful young women with beautiful smiles and soft curves.)

Pixie, a hunter with compassion. She takes down the supernatural beings who cross the line, and does it with style.

#Urban Fantasy #art #werewolves #werecats #witches #fantasy art #supernatural #gay #muscle #himbos #femboy #twink #world building

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purble-gaymer · 11 months

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alright @turtleplushi here’s some evil flavored meta knight

so for starters, this au is based on the simple premise of nightmare cursing galaxia before the gsa gets to it. it came to mind sometime back in october (so some style choices are pretty out of date). that was it for a few days, but the reason i mention i'll throw my emotions away is because i started listening to RIProducer about the same time and this song gave me a million more ideas to work with.

it starts pretty much the same as my normal interpretation of early mk and galaxia, being he hates it. he can't stand looking at it, let alone using it, knowing its retrieval resulted in the death of his friend. he drops it on the floor and kicks it under his cot, where it stays for the next month or so. things proceed as normal until he decides to pull it out one day. he picks it up and strangely finds the ruby a lot more enchanting than it used to be.

from that point on, he starts bringing it everywhere. it doesn't talk much at first, slowly building up mk's trust, and eventually during training it drops this:

now, naturally, he doesn't tell anyone about this. everyone thinks he's doing just fine--except jecra, anyway. he can tell something's wrong, and he's starting to think it's not just grief. if he asks mk about anything, the knight's response is a bit more hostile than it used to be. not always, but enough to notice it. surely he's just in the anger stage, right?

a lot of slow corruption and escalation happens in the middle chunk here, and along the way mk's perception and memories start to change. he thinks--no, he's certain the other members of the gsa don't care about him; they never did. they don't care that this war is putting so many people in danger, they don't care to help, they don't care meta knight lost one of his best friends, one of the greatest star warriors they had. what's stopping them from letting him die, from letting jecra die? he can't bear to lose anyone else. after months of spite and rage building up, he abandons his badge and swears to take revenge the gsa.

and, unfortunately, this eventually culminates in him trying to assassinate arthur. it doesn't go as planned. someone was there waiting for him.

after this, he runs and finds jecra, who was already looking for him. aforementioned blood question, meta knight is acting weirdly calm but also weirdly aggressive about this whole thing? jecra draws his sword and breaks the other's mask, and oops! mk has red eyes. super possessed. they have a big fight that ends with jecra disarming mk and shattering the ruby, breaking the curse.

there's some fallout that i never really got around to thinking about very much. dragato's fine, he's not too angry about the being stabbed thing since mk wasn't really in control. arthur's a fair bit more upset, even if his anger is sort of directionless now that the curse is gone and mk's back to normal. meta knight feels awful about the whole thing for a while. galaxia goes back to sitting stationary under his bed where he can't see it.

after a while, they get the ruby replaced, and to meta knight's horror the thing can still talk. it doesn't seem to be evil anymore, but it'll be a while before he's willing to trust it again.

i drew some things related to this, not too much but here's a couple. it was during a time when i was really unhappy with all my finished pieces, so i never posted anything, but i thought they'd be cool to share.

so that's that. i've got an adjacent 'meta knight doesn't escape from nme until way later' au but that one's just for fun cause evil mk is just a fun guy to write/draw (admittedly he is also deeply traumatized but that's a story for another time)

#long post #cw blood #do i put tags on this #kirby au #rhyn's art

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astermacguffin · 2 years

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Hey folks welcome to another evil and fucked up fic concept from yours truly:

S13. Okay. Dean is still fucked up with grief, and the combination of fear, anger, and resentment he feels towards Jack is certainly not a good mix. Still, he prefers these latter emotions because at least they're actionable emotions. You can run away or fight that which you fear or resent, but what do you do to the rotting void of grief?

All these negative emotions eventually spiral into some form of paranoia, a constant stream of "What if he turns evil? What if he takes even more from me?" Over and over in his head.

Now. What if. While they're searching the bunker for resources to help them deal with Jack, Dean accidentally stumbles upon something in their storage: a metal crown and a set of spikes. A contraption that Crowley left behind—Naomi's tools.

In fear of Jack turning evil, Dean picks up Naomi's lobotomy contraptions so he can program Jack to "not be evil."

When Dean straps down Jack into the chair, he gives the kid his very first smile. "Don't worry, kid. I'll make sure you'll never lose your path."

When Cas is finally resurrected again, everything's fine and cool and happy. And then Jack goes "Oh yeah I have weekly tuning sessions with Dean." And Cas asks. What "tuning sessions." And he watches in horror as Jack puts on the crown that Naomi uses for the lobotomies.

Cas confronts Dean about this. They fight. Cas was about to leave with Jack. Dean panics; he orders Jack to hold Cas down and prevent him from escaping.

With Jack's help, Dean tearfully straps Cas down to the chair and puts the crown on him. "I'm sorry, Cas. But I can't lose you again."

Everything is fine and cool and normal. If Sam notices some odd behavior here and there, he tries not to think too hard about it. Besides, this is the first time that they had been this happy and peaceful for a length of time, why ruin it?

Eventually, however, Sam can't ignore things any longer. His suspicions eventually lead him into finding out what Dean's been doing this entire time.

Sam confronts Dean about it. They fight. When Sam was about to take Jack and Cas away from there, Dean utters a trigger word and makes Sam fall under his control.

It turns out that this isn't the first time that Sam found out what's happening, and that Dean has been repeatedly rewriting his memories this entire time.

At first, Dean just asked Jack to erase Sam's memories. This plan doesn't work long term because Sam either just rediscovers what happens or regains his memories. Dean then ordered Jack to gradually and discreetly feed Sam some grace and transform him into as close as an angel as possible so that the Naomi's tools would work on him as well.

This bit is from jay @casnation , thanks for this: Sam repeatedly wakes up and tries to get Cas and Jack out of there but they’re programmed to take him to Dean if he does this. Like, he could totally escape if he didn’t try to save them every time.

There will be a point where the brainwashing gets so severe that they basically lose their personalities in a way that even Dean cannot ignore anymore. And so he "reprograms their personalities back" based on Dean's perceptions of them.

Crucially there will also be a point where Dean realizes just how bad he's fucked up (ideally in conjunction with the realization that he's living with three husks with zero personality), but he's trapped himself into a corner. Because he KNOWS that the moment he undoes the programming, they would all run the fuck away from that bunker and leave him alone. And he would rather reprogram them ad infinitum rather than face the consequences of what he did.

Another incredible quote from jay: "Pygmalion carving himself not just a lover but a family."

More stuff below the cut (specifically how Mary reacts to All of This when she returns from the Apocalypse World):

Dean does NOT have the guts to lobotomize his own mother. He can stomach doing it to Sam and Cas because he's already pretty good at ignoring their autonomy. Which means that Dean has to employ more subtle methods of hiding things from Mary.

He can order Cas to reaasure Mary that "everything is fine." He can also order Jack to distract Mary by bonding with her.

Here's another bit courtesy of jay: "Mary notices something is up with Sam first and Dean just says “How would you know? I’ve know him his whole life, he’s fine, you’ve only been back a year!"

Another jay bit: "no thoughts just mary looking up and realizing the bunker is a clockwork recreation of her fantasy of married life with john with cas as her role. and she has no idea what to do"

I have no idea how to end this. We can go with the more horrific route where Mary never discovers what's truly going on and so they're all just trapped there, Pygmalion and the family he carved.

The other option is that Mary finds out. This has two potential outcomes: (1) Mary convinces Dean to undo the programming. They all run the fuck out of there and leave Dean alone to face what he did. Or, (2) In a desperate attempt to keep his family together, Dean orders Jack and Cas to hold Mary down and make her forget what she discovered. The story ends with Dean, tears in his eyes, putting metal spikes in his mother's skull.

(Also. I want y'all to know that there are more fucked up parts to this but those shall remain in the dark corners of our discord chats lol)

#spn #dean winchester #fic prompt #aster writes

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theleslistuff · 2 years

Text

Ectober 21,22 Host/Theft

Warnings; OCs, aus, mentions of self harming, suicide, slight body horror, violence/blood, SCP foundation, twin au (my brother is a ghost by Darkfoxkit), trepidation au by ghostbadger

It was my last job for today, the foundation told me it was a keter class anomaly, usually I would not accept something this dangerous as my last case of the day but the place...

The place was Amity Park, my home town, I haven't been here since I decided to join the SCP foundation, the gave amnesics to my family and for everyone here... I don't exist.

I'm agent Shade, of course that's not my real name, but this helps to cover my identity if this journal gets stolen.

Anyways...

As I was saying, I was heading towards the source of the anomaly, finding... It was just at my old house, I knocked the door.

A red haired girl came out, she smiles although she looks exhausted.

-Can I help you? -

I was quite nervous, she doesn't remember and she won't recognize me because I have a hoodie over my head making my head barely visible but I think she was my big sister, with the most professional tone I could make up, I presented as a local authority, I choose the Guys in white so I had all the documents to prove it even to that organization, she called her parents.

Both had a look of grief and guilt in their eyes, they have casual clothes instead of the bright hazard suits they used to wear ever since I had memory, I told them the same things as my sister and that I came here because of spectral activity, their expression changed from sad to nervous in less than a second.

-There's nothing here! -

The woman exclaimed, her husband followed suit as he almost yells.

-Ghost are not real!, report a false positive!-

When people act like this... The foundation gives me no other option, I pulled out a little gas bomb making them fall asleep, once the gas was gone I got inside and closed the door behind me.

I know maybe this was kinda rude from me but a keter class anomaly can't wait and I need to have it reported or contained in an hour.

I moved around the house with an ectoplasm gun the foundation said I would need, I thought the anomaly would be the ghost portal they were making, my surprise was big when I found it dismantled, although when I pulled out a ectoplasm counter it still shows high levels of this substance, it really worked once..., but if this is not the anomaly, what is it?!.

The only places I didn't register were the bedrooms, I got upstairs, checked on every room until a high spike of ectoplasm energy was shown up in my... Twin brother's room.

I had to kick down the door since no one was answering at the knocks finding a teenager with almost no clothes cutting himself over an old wound in his arm with a razor bleeding green and red, he looked at me with horror.

-Get out...-

He said in a monotone tone, I got closer, I just acted in auto pilot, my mind couldn't register this broken wrench as my twin brother, I could only think of it as an SCP... My brother would never think of doing what I'm seeing in this poor and miserable creature with human and ghost blood, he flinched.

-get out!, who are you?! -

He's getting near to a panic attack..., I pulled out from my pocket a drug but before I could use it... The boy started to laugh in a very loud tone as he grabs his head with a pained expression in his eyes. Before my eyes his skin was peeling off letting see a ghost with an ear to ear smile, it has a hazard suit in black and white, white hair and pearl white skin with pure green eyes, this ghost looks like if it's melting... upside...

I pulled out the gun, it's now laughing at me as it let out his fist words, the foundation told me they could only make up some of his words between raw static but I could hear it perfectly with just an echo added to his voice.

-gets lonely without me bro? -

-How did you...?! -

For a second I lost control, it was impossible a human could remember after class D amnesics..., but maybe it was just reading my mind... I kept aiming.

-what do you want with my brothers body?! -

It laughs..., the sound made the TV in the room to turn on and show static, the same thing happened to my cellphone and a cellphone in the bed.

-I'm your brother, you abandoned me!-

I reminded silent, still seeing this thing as an anomaly, I can't see this thing as my brother, It looks angry even with that awful grin, but it didn't attack me after that, it reminded silent like waiting for me to keep asking things or to say something for this thing, I looks like can interview this thing.

-where did you came from?... -

I asked, it just laughs while it grabs it's whispy hair.

-I'm still him!!! -

He yells..., it looks like I can't interview it at all and it keeps trying to put my guard down..., at least I know it's sentient...

-look, we can do this the easy way or the hard way, there are far more dangerous things than you, so let's stop playing and tell me everything you know or someone else is going to torture you to make you more cooperative! -

He now looks frustrated, it turned back into a "human".

-You are afraid too...-

It said.

-Yeah right, that's why you have to disguise as my brother so I don't call the people I told you about! -

It looked at me with those dark blue eyes of his as he puts on a hoodie.

-then why didn't you just shot or just put me to sleep like my parents and my sister? -

He said...

-I'm not an idiot, you could make a shield or something!-

I tried to justify myself.

-do I look like I would do something like that?!, or know how to do something like that?!-

I don't know how to answer that...

-I don't know!..., I just... -

He made a sign so I would shut up, I'm grateful for that...

-I have... Some kind of contamination with ectoplasm that makes me... Turn into that thing..., It's so painful..., It makes me feel sick every time it happens, and yes, I can remember now how this stupid foundation kidnapped you, but it makes me see them when everyone else can't, they are driving me crazy!, I can't die because I would turn into one of them... -

I'm... Confused... I came willingly to the organization and what is he talking about?!.

-who are you talking about?, and well they didn't kidnap me, I went to the foundation willingly-

He chuckles.

-specters... ghost... I don't know..., they stare at me and only say to join them... And the foundation... Kidnapped you when they knew you could talk with the dead and used drugs for everyone to forget about you..., I missed you...-

I slightly lowered my head...

-How do I know you are not lying?... -

He sighs and sits on his bed.

-I don't know, I'm just... Tired..., I just want to rest... And you brought something that could help... -

He said as he pointed at my gun, I tensed up.

-How do I know you are not trying to kill your host to scape?! -

He yells once again...

-I'm your brother @#*#!, I had an accident with that damned portal that turned me into this freak!, my friends are terrified of me..., my parents are exhausted trying to find a cure, Jazz has to deal with my shitty "ghost problems", I just want it all to end!-

He took my hand with the gun and pointed it to his head.

-be a good brother and finish what you came for..., don't worry about this dumb ghost if you want to see it this way... -

He's trembling..., I'm trying to pull away the gun but his grip is too strong..., I looked up at his eyes..., That's why I couldn't recognize them, they look like a corpse ones..., I can't do this knowing who he is... Relating him to my brother..., I can't kill him or letting the foundation take him, I pulled out the gun.

-I can't!, look you can just get away from here, start again somewhere else... -

I tried to convince him.

-I don't want to start again!, I just want to rest!-

I looked away.

-then why would you insist to make me recognize you?... -

He just stared at me blankly.

-Maybe I just want this to be done for someone I love... And would keep the secret to his grave..., It's different than a stranger doing it... Or being locked up in a facility to be a guinea pig... -

I can't blame him for that... I told him they would torture him..., It's not so far away from reality...

-you want it to be done here?... -

I asked, He smiles a little...

-no..., in the lab..., so anyone else from your foundation comes here-

We headed to the lab silently.

-can I ask you a favor? -

I chuckled

-by now I think you can ask me to go into a volcano and I would gladly do it...-

He just smiled and said...

-would you uncover your face for this? -

I'm not sure about this..., one thing is to eradicate a SCP, the other... To completely reveal my identity to it..., I'm not totally sure if he's my real brother or just a very unlucky ghost trapped inside my brother's body.

-what's wrong?... -

He asked as he puts one of his ice cold hands in my shoulder.

-I'll do it if you promise something... -

I pulled out from my pocket a necklace made for neutralize powers involving possession or mind control.

-put this on when we do it... -

He put it on with no resistance.

-just let me see you... -

With some doubt I lowered my hoodie letting him see my face.

-wow..., I... I knew I had a brother but... Not a twin brother, It would have been nice to meet you in other circumstances, you know?, hehe...-

He said with a bright smile.

-I think this must be hard..., there has been barely a couple of minutes in your own house and you had to sedate your parents, your sister and kill your twin..., I... I'm making this more difficult aren't I?... -

He said in an awkward tone, by the seconds I'm beginning to regret this..., I tensed up again, I think he noticed it.

-do you want me to be in that other form?, so you don't have to think of me as... You know... -

I nodded, not wanting to look at him anymore.

-does it hurt?... -

I asked about the transformation I saw.

-yeah..., like my skin getting peel off..., but this is the last time I'm doing it... And I won't come back right?! -

He asked, I must be honest...

-I don't know..., this thing eradicates ectoplasm but I don't know what would happen to you since... You don't look like a full ghost... -

I said, but with a quite desperate tone he answered.

-maybe I can be human again if I don't die...-

I didn't answered as I loaded the gun, a scream could be heard as it erupts into laughter..., I closed my eyes and shot without looking..., a soft whisper could be heard...

-you condemned me... -

I hope someday you will forgive me...

#danny phantom #danny phantom au #danny fenton #ectober 2021 #fanfic #ectober #andy #body horror #blood #violence #trepidation au #scp oc #day 21 #day 22

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astro-rain · 3 years

Text

delicate; b.barnes

chapter seven - “the king is dead”

delicate masterlist

word count: 1.7k

synopsis: shuri has awful news. the reader is terrified but bucky is strangely calm. the world is turned upside down, and not in a good way.

pairings: bucky barnes x fem!reader

[A/N]: this was so fun to write omg get ready it’s finally getting interesting!!! (as always, OC on my wattpad @ / typicaldaze)

Months had gone by since that day at the lake. Countless therapy sessions had been endured, several hard questions asked, many many issues worked through. Bucky suffered through a few more anxiety attacks along the way, but they never hindered his resolve, thanks to (Y/N). They had made progress, good, solid progress. Bucky was pleased; (Y/N) was thrilled. It's hard to see change when you're the one going through it. However, to the person guiding that change, every step forward is recognized. She was proud. She was genuinely proud of him. He wasn’t “fixed,” he still had struggles, but he was a lot better off then before.

There was something peculiar, though. Their relationship was strictly professional, (Y/N) knew that. However, she couldn't help but feel as though along the sidelines of their progress, they had grown to become friends. She knew that, clinically, this was not appropriate, but there were no corporate guidelines she was working under. She was helping him. So, what would it matter if after all this was over, they were friends? What would it matter if his therapist also operated as his friend? Hell, she didn't even have an official therapist position here! Sharon just sent her to help. (Y/N) had decided she didn't care about the boundaries being crossed. Nothing ever went wrong with someone gaining a friend. It's fine.

Regardless, the two of them had thoroughly addressed the anxiety and the PTSD, and he now officially had both diagnoses. He understood himself and his brain so much better, and with (Y/N)'s help, he not only acknowledged his disorders, but accepted them. She taught him to not see them as the enemy, not something that was wrong with him. They were just a part of him, same as his brown hair or blue eyes.

Bucky was so much more open now. He was less on edge and more comfortable, especially around her. In all honesty, he was usually his most comfortable with her. He had coping skills and everything!

This was all grand and good, but (Y/N) hoped with everything in her that it wouldn't be ruined by the present disaster.

"I thought he was automatically supposed to be king?" (Y/N) asked, confused.

She was at her weekly meeting with Shuri for Bucky's treatment plan, and the young genius had just told her she couldn't make it next week due to T'Challa's coronation.

"He is," Shuri started, "but it's Wakandan tradition to open the position up to a dual. So, his rule isn't set in stone."

"Oh... What if someone... challenges him?"

"Then they will fight! However, I have no worries. T'Challa is a great warrior, and though I doubt anyone would challenge him, he would win if they did."

(Y/N) admired the faith Shuri had in her brother. She could tell their bond was strong.

"Couldn't you technically challenge him?"

Shuri revealed a kind of devilish smirk that only a sibling can muster. "Oh, I have thought about it. But I am much more useful in my lab, and T'Challa wouldn't know what to do with himself if he wasn't in charge."

(Y/N) looked back on the memory anxiously as she stared in horror at the look on Shuri's face. A wicked mix of fear, grief, and stress drained all the color from the princess' normally dark, beautiful skin. Shuri had always radiated confidence and composure; seeing this change worried (Y/N) deeply.

"The King is dead."

Her face became void of any expression and all she could process was fear. She thought she gasped but she couldn't remember breathing out again. Her brain was frozen. (Y/N) was in a foreign country that just lost its monarch. She was alone, and all the people she was relying on to protect her just had their kingdom invaded and taken over by someone with the word kill as part of their nickname. She was almost certain that this would be her end.

"Dr. (Y/L/N)?" Shuri said unsteadily. "Did you hear me?"

"Y-Yes I... What are we going to do?" her voice was weak and small. Pathetic and afraid.

Then, thoughts of Bucky crossed her mind. What would happen to him? He could fight, she supposed, but he doesn't have any weapons or gear and he'd be against an entire regime. What if they killed him? What if they tortured him? Different scenarios quickly flashed through her brain, but she could only one concrete thought.

I have to find him.

"My family and I have a plan, but we can't take you with us."

Any remaining semblance of hope dissipated from (Y/N)'s body, and she swore she could feel her veins quiver with apprehension.

"What?"

Her voice felt far away.

"It is not ideal, and I'd never leave you unless I had to. But Agent Everett Ross is here. It's a long story, but as you know, he can't find out about Sergeant Barnes. He can't know that either of you are here. If we take you with us, it could compromise everything we've been working for," the nervous princess explained.

"So... what of me and Bucky?"

"Again, it's a long story, but there's a... sort of fallout shelter - I guess you could call it - that was built years and years ago when the first tribes of Wakanda were constantly at war with one another. I will give you supplies and directions, and you two must go there and remain hidden until this is all over."

Fantastic. (Y/N) would get to play Cold War nuclear fallout in Wakanda.

"How will we know?"

Shuri gave her a somber look. A look of uncertainty and immense guilt.

"I wish I could apologize enough, my partner, but I do not know. I promise I will try to contact you as soon as I get any information, but for now we must hurry. We do not have much time."

With that, Shuri took (Y/N)'s arm and quickly led her her outside. It was late afternoon and the air was beginning to cool. They ran, locked together, until they met the Queen under a large tree among the outskirts of a nearby forest. The woman looked just as shaken up as Shuri.

(Y/N) could see bags of different shapes and sizes at the base of the tree. She could only hope whatever was in there was sufficient for survival.

Shuri immediately embraced her mother, but the moment was short lived as she then bent down to gather the bags.

The Queen placed her hands gently on the sides of the psychologist’s face. "I am so sorry, child. This does not involve you in the slightest yet you are swept up in the middle of it."

Shuri handed her mother the bags and they both geared (Y/N) up with all her supplies. It was heavy. Really heavy. She realized she was carrying supplies for two. Then, there was panic.

"What about Bucky?"

"Barnes doesn't know about any of this yet. I thought it best he heard it from you," Shuri expained, "and we cannot afford anymore delays. Us or you. You must go now, tell Barnes what is happening and go. I wish I could be more help, but we simply don't have the time."

(Y/N) nodded, trying to process all the chaos. She was internalizing every bit of it. As a result, she was once again, frozen.

"Dr. (Y/L/N)!" Shrui exclaimed.

Her head shot up, snapped out of it.

"Go! You must go!"

And with that, (Y/N) took off. She had been in Wakanda long enough to know her way around the castle's surrounding land. Her speed didn't last very long as she was carrying for two, but she tried all she could to keep going as quickly as possible.

Eventually she found herself outside of Bucky's living quarters. She didn't know what to do, so she knocked.

An array of different emotions went through Bucky's face. At first he looked pleased, but then he saw the horror etched into (Y/N)'s features, and the bags she was carrying. He could tell something was wrong.

"What happened?" he asked, surprisingly calm, while immediately taking some of the bags from (Y/N). He still only had one arm but that really didn't seem to matter to him.

She was out of breath, face flushed and eyes wide.

"The King is dead," she said breathlessly. "Someone... someone killed him a-and took over."

Bucky didn't look as scared as (Y/N) felt. In fact, he looked... totally fine? She was so out of it she wanted to curl up in a hole and allow natural death. How was the anxious man she was accustomed to so at ease? The world was flipped upside down and (Y/N) had no control. She wished there was a word stronger than fear because she couldn't even describe what she was feeling.

"Okay," Bucky said, gently taking another bag, leaving her with only one to carry, "What did Shuri say? What do we have to do?"

She shook her head, trying to regain her breath and her composure. "There's um - there's a fallout shelter thing we have to go to. Here."

She handed him a crumpled up piece of paper that Shuri gave her. A map with directions. (Y/N) knew he would've been better at locating it than she could at that moment.

"Alright," more of the calm voice filled her ears. "Anything else?"

"There are more details, but - we don't have time," she sighed, restlessly. Her voice began to shake ever so slightly. "Bucky, I'm so sorry. We have to go now. I promise I'll tell you everything."

"Okay," he said again. He bent down slightly, looking her directly in the eyes. " (Y/N), we're fine, okay? We're good, and we're gonna be fine. I will get us there. Are you ready?"

She nodded, steeling herself.

Bucky looked at the map, then glanced up in the direction of the shelter. He took (Y/N)’s forearm firmly. She gave him a look, confirming she was ready. And off they went.

#bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky headcanon #marvel #steve rogers #bucky reader insert #bucky blurb #bucky drabble #bucky fic #marvel fanfiction #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x female reader #james buchanan bucky barnes #james bucky barnes #winter solider edit

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zuffer-weird-girl · 4 years

Text

Never meant to be

The first attack was made. So here's my thing @glassartpeasants

Watching (Y/n) has become one of the reasons that kept him on the line... that kept him sane.

His whole word was dark and numb, the only reason he had discovered to see what it meant to be alive was them. They, without even a single word, has reached him how it was to felt alive, to felt like a damn human.

Always he tried to court them by gifts, yet they weren't really interested. Sure, such an angel wasn't suppose to felt attached to such a sin that it was greed... he should have thought about that. That was the problem.

No man alive dared to step one foot closer to you... or else he would teach them a lesson.

You. Belonged. To him. Ever since he layed his eyes on you. You were his.

..it's just you that didn't know it yet.

Such a simple task. His love for you was evident... yet, someone was trying to take you away from him.

Chrono didn't loved you enough, didn't loved you like the way he did.... although he wasn't a foul, he knew how you acted around him.

He tried. God, how much he tried to put into his head that it wasn't anything serious, that it was just his childhood friend making sure you were safe for him...

Yet... he wasn't delusional. He wasn't a foul.

The moment it came to his ears that you and him had grew found of eachother, his world seemed to fall apart. The colors from his vision drew out... he felt completely betrayed, hurt, anger... He destroyed ever part of his office, rearranged his room to put soundproof on the walls just so he could scream and shout all the profanities, curses towards his friend to had let that happen.

It was years since he hadn't felt like this... oh how he wished to just torture Kurono. For stealing the only reason of his living like that... and so out of the blue.

Yet he couldn't... He couldn't bare to see your face if you discovered the truth behind his friend's death, he couldn't bare to just see your beautiful and angelic face painted with sadness...

So he didn't do anything. He could just pray to God that this relationship didn't last long, despite on how selfish was the wish... he even dared to beg for whoever was up above....

But since when someone listened to him? Not his biological parents, not Pops... nobody.

He almost punched Kurono when the man himself had the audacity to comment on the work that you two decided to marry on the civil since that... you were carrying his child.

He felt completely defeated, disgusted... but he was forced to see the child of the woman he loved with his best friend, 'why?' you must wonder?

Because you asked. She asked him to meet her son with Hari.

He could never deny her...

He didn't stayed long. Looking at that baby, that disgusting baby hurted him. Destroyed him.... broke him...

How could a man tolerate something like this on his life?

After a few months, he decided to burry himself into the yakusa. He blamed you and Kurono; if he hadn't fell for you, he wouldn't be feeling this numb... this empty.

He couldn't remember how it happened... but he did remember it was on a rainy day.

Never think "things can't get worse then already was".... because they can. Life doesn't give you lemons after all, it punchs you in the face and kicks you into unconscious until they're satisfied.

He was running after Mimic went to him, speaking that something went wrong in a mission and as he ran on the rain he found the sign of his childhood friend... his lifeless body with a bullet craved into his forehead and blood slidding down his forehead along with the drops of the water that fell from the sky.

"Chrono..!" He couldn't bring someone back to life... his quirk was powerful but not one of that kind... he lost his childhood friend... the boy who grew up with him... the one he even dared to consider as a brother.

He suddenly widened his eyes in horror and ran towards the trail of blood that certainly wasn't of Chrono... leading to his dear (Y/n).. eyes closed and completely beaten up...

"No no NO NO-!" He went to the ground, not mindfull of his mysophobia as he got your body on his arms and checked for pulse... it was so hard to find it by the way his hands trembled, but he found it "You're breathing..." he sighed in relief and went to use his quirk before he felt you bruised and bloody hand resting on his naked wrist.

"N-no... don't..." you coughed up as he almost lost his mind.

"YOU'RE GOING TO DIE YOU IDIOT!" He shouted, grabbing onto your shoulders as your vision slowly started to fade "(Y/N) DONT CLOSE YOUR EYES! DONT YOU FUCKING DARE TO CLOSE YOUR EYES-!"

"P-please... i-I-" you extended your hand towards Chrono, the action making ylhis heart break as he stared at you "H-Hari... put me... next t-to... to him..."

"LISTEN TO ME!" He shouted desperately as tears gathered on his golden eyes as hives started to appear "YOU CAN'T JUST DIE DAMMIT! DONT LEAVE THIS WORLD-!...don't l-leave me-!" He cried as you managed to open your eyes just to speak your finals words... the ones he so desperately wished you hadn't...

"P-Please... K-Kai... take-take... take care of my... daughter..." he widened his eyes at that... out of everything you could have asked...

"I can't.. ask me anything but this-"

"Please..."

Were your last words as your head fell on his hand... he tried to use his quirk. He tried despite knowing you wouldn't want to... yet he couldn't. He failed... he failed on everything...

He failed on protecting the one he loved the most.

Years passed by... and the loss tormented him... every single day. It was there a reminder after all.

With those (E/c) eyes and white hair.. strands shaped on little arrows.

"You sure?" The girl muttered up to her guardian as he only sighed and mentioned to the chair once again. She went and crawled to the chair on the dark room.

"The world will be cured this way then?" The girl mused as the masked man put the hand cuffs on her wrists as she looked up to those emotionless golden eyes "With my quirk everything will be normal again, right? Uncle?"

He shivered in disgust and anger at the title... bit when he looked at those (E/c) and how much this girl reminded him of you... he manage to control himself and let out a sigh.

"Exactly. With my plan and this method I created, the hero sickness will dissapear... once and for all."

The girl opened a smile amd nodded.

"Okay! It's what my mom would like! Right?" She asked with hopefully eyes as he stared back at her with grief as he nodded.

"You remind me way too much of her... maybe that's why you dont see the problem on helping me... with your blood and Eri's... I will create the perfect product." He looked at the bullets and stared at Aiko.

"I do?"

He felt a burn in his eyes, one he hadn't felt on years even...

"Yeah." He snatched one of his gloves out of his hands "You do."

#overhaul #overhaul x reader #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #bnha imagine #bnha x reader #bnha characters #bnha villains #bnha #bnha fanfiction #zuffer writings

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aromantic-eight · 3 years

Text

[Rolls up sleeves] So I hear there's a gen fic celebration going on right now and boy do I have some fics to link. Strap in, folks, because the next fews days I am going to be going through 10 years worth of fic bookmarks, posting one fandom at a time.

I’ll be putting these together quick, and many of these I have not read in a long time, so they’ll mostly just have a length range, some general content tags I used for organizing, the summary, and a hopefully-still-working link.

First up is a blast from the past, a show I was obsessed with back in high school:

Yu Yu Hakusho

The Best Defense by joisbishmyoga (PG)

Words: 100k+

Tags: Crossover with Harry Potter, plotty, undercover, outsider!pov, worldbuilding, fantasy racism, demon!Kurama

In the wake of Cedric Diggory's death, after another Dark Tournament in Japan, Koenma discovers problems in the Wizarding World. Who to send but his team, undercover and under false pretenses? New magic and new companionships, as the Reikai Tantei are set loose on Hogwarts.

Note: This fic is technically Kurama/Hiei, however the author intentionally wrote it such that it could be interpreted either way. It’s blink-and-you’ll-miss-it and not important to the plot

Additional note: I initially found this fic over 10 years ago and I still go back every couple years and reread it, it’s just. So good.

A Good Offense by joisbishmyoga (PG-13)

Words: 100k+

Tags: Crossover with Harry Potter, plotty, undercover, outsider!pov, worldbuilding, fantasy racism, demon!Kurama

(Unfinished/Dropped) Another year at Hogwarts, and, as always, last year's events have consequences... Sequel to The Best Defense.

Frostbite by joisbishmyoga (Pg-13)

Words: 1-5k

Tags: Kurama & Yukina, angst, character death (kind of), grief, futurefic

Yukina doesn't want gratitude.

Note: This is technically part of the above crossover universe, but stands on its own.

Hide and Seek by nightwalker3 (PG-13)

Words: 5-10k

Tags: Suspense/horror, character study, ghosts

Kuwabara learns that normal is boring, which is just as well since it's never going to happen to him.

Note: Recommend checking out this author’s other fics if you like this. It’s a mix of genfic and slashfic and I know I’ve found others I like here that don’t seem to be among these bookmarks.

Cookie Cutter by Windswift (PG)

Words: 1-5k

Tags: Character study, pre-series, introspective rumors/misconceptions

All the other mothers in Shuuichi's class were all alike, were good, traditional Japanese women. Shiori, on the other hand, is the bad, neglectful mother. Shuuichi's childhood wasn't very easy for anyone.

The Normal Son by Titan of Saturn (PG)

Words: 500-1k

Tags: introspective, demon!Kurama

Shiori has always known that her son wasn't normal. She watched Shuichi grow up and can see that he isn't like other children. She can see that their relationship isn't mother/son, because he's perfect and she's made of glass. Drabble, Shiori's POV.

Understand by Out-Of-Control-Authoress (PG)

Words: 1-5k

Tags: Introspective, demon!Kurama, pre-series

Her eyes traveled to the little boy in the doorway, peering at her with curiosity as she stood there in the yard. For the time being, Shiori Minamino didn't need to understand.

Reputation by Windswift (PG)

Words: 1-500

Tags: Missing scene, introspective

100-word drabble - Kurama hadn't realized Hiei was old enough to follow all the old legends and rumors, especially the grain of truth hidden within.

Flowers by Pyralis Anacreon (PG)

Words: 1-5k

Tags: demon!Kurama, Introspective

Five senses in five years. And a sixth she doesn't gain until it's too late. Shiori knows her son is special.

Book of Shadows by joisbishmyoga (PG-13)

Words: 1—5k

Tags: Crossover with Cardcaptor Sakura, heists gone wrong

Hiei stops by Kurama's house with a few questions guaranteed to pique the youko's interest.

An' It Harm None by joisbishmyoga (PG-13)

Words: 5-10k

Tags: Crossover with Cardcaptor Sakura, plotty, worldbuilding

[Unfinished/Dropped] An attack has left Sakura with mysteries on her hands and in her deck. With the Guardians unable to identify them, much less agree, how is she to figure out what she's done? Sequel to my Yu Yu Hakusho fic, Book of Shadows ON HOLD pending rewrite.

Like Glass by joisbishmyoga (PG)

Words: 1-500

Tags: pre-series, character study, canon character death

When Hina died, she was still worth a proper burial.

End Game Begin by joisbishmyoga (R)

Words: 1-5k

Tags: missing scene

Yuusuke has a talk with Kurama, and along the way clears up some troubling inconsistencies. Rated for language.

#genuary 2021 #genuary #fic recs #f: yu yu hakusho #long post

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langdonwhore · 5 years

Text

prophecized pain (michael x fem! reader)

Description: It turns out you aren’t the loyal satanist you thought you were, and Michael just so happens to be the one who brings that to light.

Note: Talk by Hozier is what inspired this honestly. This is my first Michael fanfic and I hope it’s up to par! I appreciate all forms of feedback! Let me know what you think.

Word Count: 1.7k (the rest of the chapters will be much longer!)

Warnings for this chapter include: Cussing.

Chapter One:

You noticed him walk in almost immediately, it was a shift in the air. He looked as if the world had almost legitimately put itself upon his shoulders. He was covered in dirt, and another substance you weren't too curious to think or ask about. His hair, heart, and soul disheveled and you felt as if you shouldn't be able to tell that about a person from their mere appearance. At least not at first glance. He had lost all hope, and you could feel it.

Far too caught up in your own head, you hadn't noticed he'd made his way to the pew you were sat at, plopping down with no mercy and staring straight ahead as the dark priest belted her beliefs to Satan's loyal followers. You snapped your head forward, careful to give the man his own sorrowed privacy. You chimed into the conversation the dark priest was arguing, laughable as it was really everyone was talking, discussing and comparing their own evil actions they had performed for their Dark Lord. Chewing your lip you raised an anxious arm to spill your latest duties, and when the dark priest called upon you, you spoke cautiously. "Lately I've been focused more on stealing money from celebrities and donating it to animal shelters." Hearing a few scoffs you curled in upon yourself. You knew the majority of the people who attended the Satanic Church were murderers, it didn't bother you because you knew they had a primal cause, a destiny to fulfill, but you weren't like most Satanists. Not really.

When the service was over you made your way to the snack deck, plopping grapes and blueberries into your mouth as everyone gathered and planned their next heists. Grabbing a cup full of juice you stared off about to take a sip when you noticed the same man from earlier was staring at the table full of sandwiches. He never made a move to grab one, eyes locked onto the snacks as if they were the forbidden fruits. Setting your pride.. and anxiety aside you took a few cautious strides towards him. He was terrifying in the most unexplainable ways. You cleared your throat and he made no move to turn towards you, only taking a deep breath and tapping his leather boot against the tile. You spoke hesitantly, "You know, you may be new, but these are for everyone and I can tell you're starving." You stepped forward to stand beside him, grabbing a plate and putting a few items onto it and gesturing it towards him. He made no move to take it from you, but turned his head toward you to scan your figure.

"You don't belong here." He spoke, turning his entire body towards you. You flinched away, something about his icy tone and stance had you uneasy. "Care to explain?" you asked him, setting the plate down, just to give him your full attention. He raised an eyebrow, and you could've swore he rolled his eyes. "You, as in the girl who steals money to donate it to fucking charities, does not belong here. You aren't fit to serve my Father when what he craves is chaos. He doesn't need charity work sweetheart, He needs bloodshed and innocence sacrificed to him. Acts of horror your little mind could never conjure up. I've sat in grief for days in the forest, just for him to guide me home and.." he paused and you took that moment to breathe. Catching glimpse of the blood splattered under his sleeves and over his black clothing that was days old at least. "people like you, who are unable to proudly shed blood upon His name aren't worthy of redemption."

You were stunned to say the least. He was steaming and whatever else had him upset before he even brought himself here was fueling him on. How dare he, a strange man you'd never met before, accuse you of not fulfilling your Satanic promise. Of course he was right, you had never shed blood or sold your soul. Far too terrified to get caught by the law and far too scared to bare your neck to the beast. The thought of it sending you spiraling into shame and how dare a stranger have the audacity. How dare he. "What makes you think I haven't fulfilled my promise? Do you always intend to insult strangers, or is that today's theme?" you barked back, trying to feign control.

He really did sigh and roll his eyes this time, entirely fed up it seemed. Running a dirty hand through his golden locks he snarled, "The one bad thing you've ever done is steal the money from that racist youtuber, but then you donated all three hundred million of it to the animal rescue center. You have yet to sacrifice your soul to my Father and then question me on my anger? You can't claim to serve him when you haven't given yourself to him fully. I'm fucking starving" He spoke as he snatched the plate off the table and walked out of the building, leaving you frozen and slack jawed. Never before had you been so confused, he referred to the Dark Lord as his Father, which wasn't unusual at all. Except, there was something about the way he referred to the beast. It was unholy, unwelcoming, and unsafe. You had never met such a strange, yet dark aura. His presence still lingered no matter where you ran to, even in bed late at night or in your early morning shower. The darkness was tainted and you could almost smell it.

Exactly a week later you were back at service, hoping the not so familiar face would stay hidden in whatever shadow he originated from. A week had passed and you still had felt the nagging sensation of what felt like paranoia ever since his stern prophesation to you. You had hoped dearly he wouldn't return, you had hoped he wouldn't taint your mind any further. Fear and curiosity embezzling itself into the depths of your mind. Oddly enough, you completely doubted that was the last time you'd ever see him. In fact you had an aching feeling inside that he was near. It was an overbearing feeling in your chest that had the hairs on the back of your neck astray, and the goosebumps littering your body, rigid. With a shaky body you made your way to your usual pew, noticing a pretty unusual commotion at the front alter. Oh no.

There he was, in all his unholy glory. Wearing a black robe, and clearly he had showered this time around. You were standing now, almost unconsciously making your way to the front, to him. You were prying, way too curious to care about the unforeseen consequences that you being nosy may bring. Then you heard it, "He's the one.." and you froze in place. Time had unbeknowingly stopped, to some that statement would be rather normal, rather funny really. He was the Father's son. He was the Antichrist. You didn't need proof, the prophecy was already proven from the aching fear you had felt for him since you first laid eyes upon him. The way he had ridiculed you for not being worthy of his Father's redemption. It all made sense now.

With wide eyes you took quiet steps back to your seat, hoping no one saw, and hoping no one could sense your distress. Looking up you caught sight of him, preparing to make sacrifice of a young man and woman. He raised the dagger, chanting a loud 'Ave Satanas' along with everyone else there. It took a good nanosecond before he sliced both of their throats, sending them to an unknown realm. It was catastrophic really, the upset feeling you had in your stomach as the blood poured out of their bodies. It was even worse when you realized he had been staring at you for who knows how long. His eyes were glazed over, a pale black as they tore into the deepest depths of your soul. You knew exactly what he wanted as his lip curled up in a little smirk that made you wildly uncomfortable. He wanted, craved almost, you to bare your neck to him. Hand him your soul on a silver platter like everyone else in the building had already. Idealistically you would, considering the main idea of the church was to literally serve him but was it really worth it? No. He'd have free reign to your subconscious, you're carnal desires and deepest regrets. Something so livid about that terrified you into denial.

As he smoothly stepped off the alter, you took that as your momentary sign to vacate the situation. Walking home to avoid being subjected to you're unwanted destiny. Maybe you'd decide to submit but was it really worth it if you had to hand it to him? His very aura had darkness and power you didn't want to dabble with. Comically, you'd rather not cause trouble but you knew if the true Son had been found, the world was soon to meet it's doom. Prophecies were always fulfilled, and soon this one would be too. Why fret over anything when everything would be over soon.

Late at night in bed you were woken to harsh thumps on your door, jumping up you grabbed your sheer black robe and tied a knot in it before checking the time. 3:00AM. You sighed before getting a baseball bat and walking to the front door, "Who is it?" you asked gripping the bat in fear of an intruder. But the hairs sticking up on the back of your neck spoke numbers.

There was a dark chuckle before the door creaked open on it's own, forcing you to stumble back. You raised the bat and prepared to swing, then you saw his face. "Oh. It's you." you sighed before dropping the bat and going to sit on the couch. He was dressed in all black, a turtleneck dress shirt accompanied by dress pants and mens boots. "Who else would visit you at the Devil's hour?" He strung, ice in his tone and trouble in his smile. Raising your hands in mock humor you let out a humorless laugh speaking, "I don't even know your name, yet you randomly show up to my house? Kinda predatory if you ask me." He didn't think that was funny. Not at all.

"Well I wasn't asking.. and my name is Michael Langdon. It's a displeasure to finally meet you."

#michael langdon #ahs apocalypse #michael langdon fic

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zuffer-weird-girl · 4 years

Text

Not happening. (Not again)

He sighed in pure annoyance and hatred while walking slowly behind the desperate girl that was running and whimpering for help on that filthy alley.

He didn't even wasted his energy running after, because he knew that no matter what, that girl would always come back to him by force or by will. Especially when she didn't want it any more deaths happening because of her curse...

Nobody understanded. Nobody. Eri's blood was essential for reviving the old man's wish and dream... and to free his dear one from her curse.

He didn't had much time...

"Sir?" The doctor spoked aprehensively with Chisaki while you got out from the hospital bed "Mind if we talk for just a bit?... alone?"

He arched his eyebrow in pure disgust and annoyance while you giggled and waved your hands up in the air.

"Is okay! I will get out." You looked at Chisaki with a smile before discretely caresing his gloved hand "I will wait for you outside on the waiting room, right?"

"Be careful." He said simply, the moment you closed the door his body immediately froze while his gut told him subsconciously that.. something bad was going to happen.

This usually appeared minutes before he saw you dying...

"Overhaul sir..." the doctor sighed with grief "About your partner's quirk.."

"Spit it out." He growled while glaring daggers at the doctor.

"... you might want to take a seat." The man showed with his palm at the chair in fron of his desk.

Despite being so aprehensive, and dare he say anxious, he sitted slowly, glaring at him for answers. The man sighed, while locking his hands together on the desk.

"She has not much time left." Kai's eyes widened like they never had before on his life, gloves dissapearing in one blink of a eye.

"..what?" He breathed out, his spine going colder and colder by the infuriating tic and toc from that clock hanging on the wall.

"Her quirk. I treated her father once, so I sadly know the deal..." he looked up at Chisaki with a sour expression "Pardon me for asking... but how many times did she..?"

"... I almost lost count. But I guess it was... 119..."

The doctor winced before taking inhaling, preparing to bring the bad news for the young man in front of him.

"Quirks like that have a certain... limit of atturing themselfs... You can guess that by many times she got weaker and more fragile to some of accidents right?" He saw Chisaki nodding a bit trembly.

"That means her body is not taking anymore... Overhaul, I am afraid to say this... but if she suffers another accident or even much loss of blood... her quirk is not going to work anymore and..."

"Will not... be back." He ßaid in oure horror while the doctor nodded sadly, never once expecting to see such a face on the yakusa boss future leader.

"I am afraid so... Her father died by something so indignant, he fell down some stairs, something that it seems normal for us. But his wife told me that he had presented death by the number 119... just like your partner out there."

His heart dropped to his stomach as his eyes remained wide... one more. One more and you would be gone for real...

"You can't tell me there isn't a fucking cure for this." He hissed teh words, griping on his pants so hard that his knuckles turned white.

"Only by a miracle... maybe if her quirl was removed or something, her cells of the body would be slowly recuperating their strenght and health..." he sighed "But that's impossible. Unless you have someone like Eraserhead in your house and keeps using his quirk on her."

He lifted up abruptly from his chair, scaring a bit the man before he nodded and left his room with a bitter and insufferable taste on hsi mouth.

He opened the door and bites his tongue to not just cry and fall on your arms when he saw you reading some magazine and gently waved at him when noticed presence.

One more time.. and he would lose this...

"So. Any bad news?" You asked worriedly before he carresed your cheek, sighing in relief when your face melt in bliss at his touch.

"No. No, nothing of bad news." He lied bitterly before walking besides you "Just warnings for you to be more.. careful."

"Does he know it doesn't depend on me?" You asked sadly, frow returning "It just happens out of no where... you know that."

He sighed trembling before reaching for your hand, pushing you gently for him to be on the side of the street instead.

"I know this better than anyone angel... trust me." He sighed heavily, you tilted your head at his expression.

He wasn't wearing that stoic facade of his... he seemed more... angry? Desperate? Even determined you would guess.

"Kai? Did he said something else?" You pried, only receuving a shake of his head and a squeeze on your hand.

You... had a bad feeling about this... yet, couldn't tell what it was...

She stills keep running even knowing that he will get her after... seriously, he knew that childs were dumb but why keep making him waste energy and time?

He doesn't have time for her tantrums. He has to make those bullets for testing, curing his angel and prepared the marketing of the bullets on the underground.

Crush hero society. Cure the world from the hero syndrome. Bring the yakusa back to their glory days.... save his (Y/n)...

Those were the only things that kept him living. That gave a life purpose...

He wouldn't let Pops or his angel down. He knew that. He was going to prove this.

"Have you completly lost your humanity Chisaki?" Pops asked in pure horror after interrupting Kai's explanation from his plan.

Again. Again being refused. Why he can't understand that he just wants to repay him?! Is that difficult to get that this is for him and her?!

"... Lost my humanity?" He said darkly, walking slowly towards the elder "You took me in, I just want to repay you."

He lowered a bit his glove with his thumb, the elder catching what was happening before Chisaki continued.

"Lost my humanity you say? Tell me pops. How would you feel if your father figurine turned your ideas down constantly? Or even better yet.." he looked Pops dead in the eye, clenching his jaw while controling himself to not just break down.

"How would you feel if the love and light of your life, simply had a curse that just can't be cured. Keeps dying in front of your eyes every damn time... if you got something to cure them you would take it wouldn't you?"

He aproached even more and his glove fell down...

"Just lay back and relax. Is going to hurt just for a moment."

He growled at her sudden pleas starting to come out while she runned and kept looking back at him.

He had to do this. Stop running like a damn pest.

"He what?!" You asked in horror while lifting youserlf from the couch, immediately coming to him with hands on his arms.

He was pleased when he discovered that Pops and you grew found of each other... this explained your reaction when he told about his... current condition.

"Kai I'm so sorry..." you said almost tearing while he only stared into your eyes.

"Is not a problem. He is going to be alright soon. I know it." He carresed your cheek before frowing. "What are these clothes for?"

You looked down at yourself and your gym clothes, making a confused noise while looking back at him.

"What's the matter with them? I was going in for a run like I always do. Remember? Around the block?"

His eyes darkened in worry and hatred. No. You couldn't get out. What if something happened?

"You're not going." He growled while you arched a eyebrow at his tone of voice.

He never once lowered his voice with you excluding in some couple fights which were rare... so why?

"Excuse me?" You asked in disbelief "I was going with Ku-"

"Not with Chrono. Not with Mimic. Not with ANYONE." He growled whiel he glared daggers at you "You're not getting out of this place."

You tsked in anger before turning in your feet to walk out before he grabbed your wrist.

"Kai let g-!"

"You're NOT leaving this house. Understand (Y/n)?"

"Give me a good reason then!" You shouted this time, not even caring about how he despised those things.

"You want to just die outside like the other times? Is that it?!" He hissed in pure anger while you gasped in disbelief.

"Chisaki is only around THE BLOCK."

"You can be attacked. Suffer a car accident. Hell even trip in your own foot by how careless you are!"

"Is this worry now?" You laughed bitterly before yanking a bit your hand... without success on getting out of his grasp.

"Yes it is dammit! I'm tired of seing the only light on my dark life dying over anD OVER AGAIN!" He shouted, catching you off guard immediately.

A uncomfortable silence got between teh both of you while he breathed in and out to catch his breath and his compusture back.

He flinched a bit at your hand in his cheek before looking at you.

"I know it hurts... I told you many times that you can let go of me-"

"Like hell I would." He growled, grabbing your hand on his cheek and pressing it even more to hsi face.

You made one of your most sad and broken face before oushing him in for a hug. He catched you again off of guard when he wrapped without hesitation his arms around your waist and buries his face on the crook of your neck.

"... You know that always I will come back to you right?"

He broke at those words... knowing exactly that this time it wasn't true.

He let out a cry and just burried his teary eyes in your neck as his back shocked with every sob pass through his lips.

He couldn't lose you...

Ah great... that brat bumped into some hero...

He inhale to remain his compusture and to remain pacient while talking with those socks.

"You should be more careful." He started, Eri looking at him with terror "We don't want to cause any problems for the heroes."

The green haired boy looked up at him with the same look Eri gabe to him while the older and blonde one just gave him a look.

"Let's go home. Eri."

#overhaul x reader #overhaul scenario #fanfic overhaul #overhaul #chisaki kai imagine scenario #kai chisaki x reader #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #kai chisaki #bnha x reader #bnha imagine #bnha characters #bnha villains #bnha #my writing #zuffer writings

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