#honestly feels like i still left some stuff out but good grief

[chipthekeeper]

After many months of sporadically yelling my thoughts in various posts.........it is time.

*turns out there's like, so much competition for being the worst dad in this galaxy **a biased account from someone with their own very mid dad

Read on for an unnecessarily lengthy argument and just make sure to picture me like this the whole time

The Evidence:

Similarities/parallels between them

Shapeshifting -- They both transform so fully and easily from rebel mode to fancy rich asshole and back again throughout the show. Others do as well, but not nearly as often as they do and not nearly as sharp contrast from one thing to another

Quick tempers -- Evident from the way they snap at each other and the people they work with

Familiar framing -- There’s nothing accidental in this show. I believe the below photos draw a very deliberate, if subtle, parallel between them. We don’t see any of the other rebels using a stick like that, and Luthen's doesn't seem to actually have a function besides making youtubers believe he's a Jedi (I have a whole spin-off conspiracy theory on that we can get into some other day if you ask me)

Blonde -- Obviously. Though it seems Vel's hair is changing for season two. Perhaps a hint that she is trying to distance herself from her father's influence? (okay this part is mostly a joke but then I talked myself into something)

Also, this brand new page from the Dawn of Rebellion visual guide book that made me go !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! because, you know, proximity is everything. It would have made much more sense for Kleya to be on this page and Vel to be beside Cinta on the next page, right? Nope, not if there's a deeper connection here!

Their first interaction

Even before we meet Vel, Luthen predicts to Cassian exactly how she will react to them being there

He first tries to greet her with a big fake grin. Big time dad behavior to act like none of the past shit between you has ever gone down. But Vel remembers, doesn’t buy the act

Basically their interaction is just very familiar and informal, then breaks down quickly because of their attitudes toward each other

Vel is being very childish for most of it, pacing around, not keeping eye contact, then fully acting like a kid who doesn’t want to pick up their toys (see above picture)

Which then brings the Big Dad Energy from Luthen - "LOOK AT ME!!" he yells. The dadest dad behavior to ever dad. I can so easily picture this from my dad. "Look at me when I'm talking to you! Do what I say!" You have no choice but to shut up and obey unless you want to lose your allowance heist mission

Maybe he does actually care?

The night before the heist, Luthen is acting very strange, so much so that Kleya calls him out for being nervous. This is understandable given the stakes. BUT!

“They’re either going to be okay out there or they’re not” from Kleya is interesting. Be okay, rather than do okay. Like she knows he’s particularly worried about their safety, about one person’s safety especially?

And Vel’s mentioned in the very next line, reminding us of their connection again: "Vel's the only one who traces back" -- could be because she’s the only one who’s seen him, but who would actually be able to “trace” that??

Vel's need for approval

Veeerrryyyyy familiar to every eldest daughter constantly ignored by dad, seen most prominently in her interactions with Kleya

First right after the heist -- "Where is he?" ... "He read your message." "I really thought he'd be here?" Oh? Why's that? Why would he be there unless it was personal? Unless there was some sort of expectation of praise for the job well done, or comfort after losing so much of the team?

Later, before Ferrix, Vel won't give Kleya the information about Maarva's death until she secures the "I'll make sure he knows where it came from" promise from her

Rebellion is a family affair

"But Chip, Vel can't be related to Mon and Luthen!" Why not? There's nothing really that says Luthen isn't/can't be Mon's uncle

In fact, it might even make it easier to understand how a prominent Senator who's outwardly so centrist and careful could get Luthen's attention -- they always knew each other!

Anyway, a visual aid made months ago by @jedi-valjean, outlining the possible family tree, along with what seems to be the typical Chandrilan matriarchal naming conventions:

Vel Sartha, nepo baby

Vel absolutely does not have the experience or the stomach to be leading a mission like Aldhani. Why did he let her? That's right, nepotism

Hints to this in both her interactions with Kleya -- first "this is what revolution looks like" and then "You're off the rails. You're lucky he's not here"

She's clearly not ready and messing things up, but she's not facing any consequences for it because of her proximity to Luthen

Their second interaction

The convo on Ferrix is less loaded but still interesting

Vel looking at him and greeting him with a hint of "oh so you do acknowledge that I exist....but only because I have the information you need"

Again, the way they talk to each other is oddly informal for a boss and subordinate. Plus at the end he gives her tasks like a dad handing out chores

(also seems to like saying Cinta's name to her. supportive of his daughter's girlfriend, that gets him some good dad points)

Luthen's talk with Lonni

pound for pound, this is the most important part outside of their first interaction

As Lonni comes down in the elevator, Luthen congratulates him on becoming a father to a "healthy, beautiful" daughter. Tells him he must be pleased

Lonni thinks he's being threatened, asks "Do you ever think how it might feel from my side?" And Luthen tells him "I think about you constantly."

This. Shit. Makes. Me. CRAZY.

Because Luthen *was* Lonni. Just a guy with a daughter, trying to fight for something better

Also he sacrifices Kreegyr and all his men just to keep Lonni’s cover from being blown. Obviously that’s selfish on one hand, he gets to keep his spy, but also….Lonni’s daughter gets to keep her dad. I don’t think Luthen's just saying that to appease him. “You love your daughter," he says. The whole thing hits home for him and he thinks about it constantly

Basically the whole scene is a conversation between Luthen as he is now and Luthen as he could have been -- “Your investment in the rebellion is epic. A double life. Every day a performance.” He’s TALKING TO HIMSELF

And what does Luthen sacrifice? "...Kinship....Love" -- the love of his family? His kin? He may have his daughter in his life but they're hardly more than coworkers because of what they have to do. They're both sacrificing a real relationship with each other

"I burn my decency for someone else's future" -- he's sacrificed being a good father to fight and make a better future for his daughter!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The shoutout to his ego not having a "mirror" calls us back to Vel and Cinta's conversation, another probably deliberate thread supposed to connect them in our minds

"You'll stay with me, Lonni" can mean both that he's not letting Lonni out of this and, again, that he's always thinking of him (always thinking of that other version of his life)

The Conclusions

Putting together all the evidence and the fact that no one in the show seems to know about the connection between them, I can basically come to two possible conclusions:

Vel didn't find out this man was her father until she was already an adult

She knew him as a child but then he began making his calculations and left her and her mother

Either way, they would have gone years without interacting and thus it would be easy to hide their true connection once they've been reunited. And either way, their relationship would be as strained as it appears. Vel would want to have his attention and approval in a way she never did before, and Luthen would feel guilty enough to give her a job she hasn't really earned.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

#i've fully lost it #this was fun tho. no ragrets #andor #luthen rael #vel sartha #honestly feels like i still left some stuff out but good grief #my posts #bookmarks

[sabertoothwalrus]

hi !! just curious because i was looking at your adventure time episode guide and i love hearing other peoples adventure time takes !! how come you don't like finn's characterisation in together again?

I've talked about it before here and here!

But also I'm gonna say more and share some art I did in 2021 for a rewrite comic that I never got around to doing

So again to reiterate: Adventure Time is usually VERY good at making it feel like time passes, even when you're not watching. It's something about what they don't show that tells you everything you need to know.

Together Again did not do this.

It really really felt like they were avoiding showing Finn as an adult, as if they wanted to leave his post-show life ambiguous. Which, now that Fionna and Cake has shown us literally that, it makes Together Again feel even more wrong?? Like. imagine you have to pick a moment from your life that represents You™ the most. Together Again said that Finn, after living his whole life and dying as an old man, feels most represented by how he was at 17. I do not buy this. I am 25, and I cannot fathom identifying by my 17 year old self. I was a completely different person then, I was still cooking. I can imagine most people feel the same. And ok, so maybe Finn DOES for some reason feel stuck at 17? Explain to me why!! What needed to happen to him that made him feel that way?

And before you just say "it's because Jake died," there's still too much that was left out. How old was Finn when Jake died? What was Finn like, at that point? What else had they accomplished? What was he doing at the time that was on the forefront of his mind? Where/with who did they spend most of their time? Where were they living after the treehouse got destroyed?

It was like,,, it was like the story Together Again actually wanted to tell was about Finn's grief, and how poorly he copes, and how too much of his identity is tied to Having Jake, and how he struggles to move on. But that's not the story we got. I honestly think-- as interesting as it was-- everything with New Death and Tiffany and Lich just did a disservice to the focus, which was Finn trying to get over Jake.

I think Together Again should have gone like this:

Finn and Jake had always planned that whoever died first would wait in the dead world for the other to die so the two of them could reincarnate. Jake dies first. Jake would be able to "watch over" Finn as he lives the rest of his life, so Jake wouldn't miss Finn as much as vice versa, since he'd feel like he's still there with him. Eventually, Finn dies.

Finn's appearance would change with his emotional state. I thought it'd be interesting to show different phases of his life through the stages of grief.

There'd be a room where they could watch Finn's memories. Finn would walk Jake through the events of his life. We SEE exactly how Finn dealt with grief, with heartbreak, with love, with friends, with community. All the good and all the bad.

By the end of it, Finn is quiet. "Jake... when we reincarnate, will we.. lose all of this?" "Well, do you remember anything from any of your other past lives?" "No.. But that's the point. I don't want to forget you." Finn, despite their promise, despite Jake waiting for him all this time, declines reincarnating. He doesn't want to move on, because that would mean forgetting everything. He wants to say with Jake!! He JUST got Jake back!!

“What if— in the future— what if they forget about us? What if they don’t know about all the stuff we did?” We see Ooo in its current state. It’s changed, but it’s clearly been affected by the two of them. Every person they’ve saved, every civilization they helped build, every hero they’ve inspired. They’ve left their touch everywhere. “They’ll know,” Jake says with certainty. “We’ll know.” We see the future, with Shermy and Beth. We see the Finn Sword, and BMO with all their old belongings. Everything stays, but it still changes. Will happen, happening, happened. These have always been the themes of the show. They reincarnate, together.

#adventure time #together again #my art #finn the human #finn mertens #jake the dog #distant lands

[galedekarios]

more gale & tara epilogue stuff

tara's epilogue conversation is so extremely devastating if gale sacrificed himself. since i can't bring myself to play it, i thought i'd look at it in the files and share what i find here.

tara can be found at camp and this is how the conversation with the player begins:

Tara the Tressym: Oh, hello, darling. I was hoping to see you. Withers informed me about this little get-together and I thought I'd show my whiskers.devnote Tara the Tressym: I can almost feel Gale here. Among his friends - in you. Some part of him remains, doesn't it? devnote: Gale has died so she's very sad and nostalgic.

this devnote is repeated for almost every line for tara in this convo.

from here, the player has various options to reply. i'll be going through them in order.

the first is one where the player points out the magically conjured image of himself that gale left behind in case of his permanent death:

Player: Well, his magical ghost is still here, if that's what you mean. Tara the Tressym: That thing's no more than a shadow of the real man. A nonsense. Though it captures some of his more insufferable qualities...

the second option is the player saying that they are feeling something similar, a presence that reminds them of gale:

Player: It does, Tara. I can feel his presence too. Tara the Tressym: A crackling in the air, isn't it? That flair of magic and mischief.

despite the tragedy of it all, i do love tara describing gale's presence as 'that flair of magic and mischief'. it's so very sweet and sad, especially remembering just long she's known him.

perhaps here she remembers the boy who accidentally set the rose bush on fire and cried, just as elminster does. or perhaps the boy who summoned a magma mephit, causing chaos, but also making a lifelong friend.

the third option is to tell tara that you miss gale, too, and this honestly made me tear up:

Player: I miss him too, Tara. Tara the Tressym: That's good. We should miss him. He was such a lovely fellow. Proud as a peacock, but... my little love. Tara the Tressym: Oh, what I wouldn't give to snuggle up on his lap one more time. Just once would do. Player: Would a fuss from me make you feel better?

"He was such a lovely fellow. Proud as a peacock, but... my little love."

PROUD AS A PEACOCK BUT... MY LITTLE LOVE

M Y L I T T L E L O V E

this is obviously completely fine so i'll continue with the fourth option:

Player: You can snuggle up in my lap later, if you like. Tara the Tressym: Oh, I couldn't possibly... unless... well, perhaps it's not a terrible idea. Gale would be quite pleased to know we've made friends, wouldn't he?

it's clear that tara needs some comfort. despite her stiff upper lip approach to most news devastating to her and the thin veneer of control she puts on here.

the fifth option is expressing that you know how she feels:

Player: I know how you feel. Tara the Tressym: Ah, to lose the one you love the most. What a terrible thing.

the sixth option is rather callous and tara's response to it once again heartbreaking:

Player: Alas, you can't. Tara the Tressym: No. Not in this life, at least.

the last option again shows tara's true grief at what happened:

Player: He's gone. We have to accept that. Tara the Tressym: I suppose we do. But I certainly wish we didn't.

most of these different options lead to the end of the conversation with tara, where she invites the player to visit her and morena in waterdeep:

Tara the Tressym: Perhaps you'd be willing to come meet Gale's mother, some time? She misses him so - and I know it would do her heart a world of good to discuss her son with someone who knew him as he was.

again, the player has various choices to either accept or refuse her invitation. i won't go through them all and you can read for yourself in the screenshot i provided. but i do want to look at these two options here:

Tara the Tressym: Perhaps you'd be willing to come meet Gale's mother, some time? She misses him so - and I know it would do her heart a world of good to discuss her son with someone who knew him as he was. Player: I'd love to, but I'm leaving Faerûn after tonight. Tara the Tressym: Well if you ever come back do look us up in Waterdeep. Surname 'Dekarios'. I'd enjoy the chance to reminisce about the good man we knew.

i'm once more reminded of that one line in elminster's letter and i feel so sad for morena:

Does he live within his mother’s ageing heart, weeping for those roses? 

2.

Player: I'll consider it. Tara the Tressym: See that you do. We'd love to have you. Things have been rather quiet without himself cluttering up the place.

which made me think about gale's line that his tower has never been so free of clutter ever since he had to deal with his condition.

anyhow, i hope this was interesting to some of you!

#gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #tara the tressym #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 meta #bg3 spoilers #bg3 patch 5 spoilers #gale epilogue spoilers #ch: gale dekarios #ch: tara the tressym #vg: baldur's gate 3 #series: baldur's gate #meta: mybg3

[the-orange-tabby-cat]

Wednesday: Part II

joel miller x fem!reader

Summary of the fic: For the last 5 years, every Wednesday you watched a handsome man walk by your street with a lilac bouquet in hands. Except he doesn't stroll on your street this Wednesday, he shows up at your grief support group. 🐾

read on AO3 | masterlist | previous chapter

Warnings: No outbreak AU, Grief and its implications, Reader lost her mom, Reader's mom has a name (but no physical description), Group therapy, Grief support group, Parent grief, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Slow Build, Fluff, No use of y/n

Word count of the chapter: 3,6k

II. BUTTERCUPS

In how many boxes could you put your whole life? Your mom could do it in 12. There are 12 boxes in your living room, all about her. You’ve been ignoring it since the day you put everything inside them and said to yourself that you could do it in another moment when grief didn’t overwhelm you. It has been over 5 years.

You peaked the boxes here and there over the years, of course. You left part of them between your apartment storage and Grandpa’s house, who was much more in day with them. He gathered the memories, cleaned up the gunk and decided to hold on only to what it was personal — her handwritten recipes, the photo albums, her favorite record.

It was Henry’s idea to review all these boxes, he had helped his parents to move and leave his childhood house behind, including Sam’s room.

“I have my own place, Sam didn’t live with me, and look at how I’m doing. Thought my parents could move on easier if they didn’t have his bedroom waiting for him, you know? They cleaned up a bit after, you know, but his things were there still. I got to myself some of his comics and one of his action figures, everything else we donated.” He said to you last grief support group meeting while sipping coffee.

“How do you feel now?” You asked in a small voice.

“Like some weight left my shoulders, honestly. His stuff is just stuff, they aren’t him. The meaning behind it is what makes us cling to it. I prefer to have memories of him than have everything waiting for his return.”

You nodded in guilty of the boxes waiting for your review. If your mom didn’t accumulate so much while raising you, traveling, meeting people, maybe you wouldn’t be in this position of choosing which things you could keep.

“You should do it too, give it a try.” Henry smiled tightly and went to sit in the circle. You sighed and texted your uncle if he was free that weekend.

And here you are, with 12 boxes opened and ready for you. Uncle Michael has been an angel, trying to make this somewhat easier on you. After Grandpa, the family moved on quickly from it. They found themselves back on a routine, on their daily habits and she became a memory, not a constant. He lived his grief privately, never speaking in detail with you both because he knew that neither was ready for it. He was more than happy to help you with the boxes, even more if it meant to get you out of the perpetual grief inside your apartment.

The twins came with him, another good thing since they were playing with the cat and leaving you and your uncle alone with the 12 boxes. Too many things, you were already lost on it.

“Okay, kiddo, have you ever done this before?” You shook your head still looking at the boxes. “Don’t worry. Abby and I had to do this to grandma’s stuff, it’ll be like a band-aid. The sooner you rip it off, the better, alright?”

“What have you done with grandma’s things? Like… Have you donated? Gave to people close to her? How do you choose what to keep?” You asked putting both hands on your hips and trying to choose which box to start from.

“We choose to keep whatever we had attached memories to it. It wasn’t my idea, of course, Abby led it. She separated what we would be heartbroken to lose and everything else we gave away. Do you know how many dishcloths grandma had? Over a 100, I counted myself.”

You laughed at the memory of your mom calling you to say she had never seen that many dishcloths inside the same drawer. She sounded happy in that call, not emotionally drenched from running her mother’s stuff. You can do it.

12 boxes became 3 piles as the afternoon became night. Uncle Michael made a pile of everything that he would donate to the Salvation Army, a second pile for the things he would keep for him (you almost started a fight for her harmonica, but he knew how to play it and you had no clue) and third one for what you choose to keep.

Her sea animal drawings, some technical books, her jewelry box, her fridge magnets and postcard collections, got even an old cardigan that she would always use in winter inside the house. You did feel lighter like it wasn’t no longer in the back of your mind that at some point you would have to open every single box and be reminded that she was no longer here.

Uncle Michael was still separating some books to donate when a picture fell from one of them. You saw a little girl’s face and smiled at how much of her features she still in her mature face after growing up. He nodded for you to get closer to the picture.

“Look it. You kinda looked alike, see?” He pointed to some parts of her face, the ones you haven’t noticed in you in a while. You couldn’t help but smile at it.

“Never saw this. Does it have a date?” Uncle Michael turned the picture and in a corner you could read May, 1972. “She was an only child yet.”

“Yeah, that’s why she is smiling, still had some peace,” you both laughed at it. With a smile on his lips, Uncle Michael put the picture in your hands. “You should give it to Grandpa. He is always at his office, this picture is from a window near his table, see? I think he would like to have it.”

You pondered about it, if his behavior had some connection to the picture just like Joel’s lilacs were still connected to Sarah. Joel. You haven’t seen him in a while, mostly getting updates here and there from Tess. Maybe he was busy with his own set of boxes too, cleaning up his baggage a box at a time.

Ink moves faster in the paper getting shape little by little. You are near the catering listening to Henry’s story, but your mind is focused on taking every detail of Joel’s side profile. 

He is oblivious to it, lost in his thoughts to notice you drawing him from afar. Rare are the moments he allows himself to come to the grief support group meetings, you can count on your fingers how many times you saw him on Wednesdays since his first time.

“Since when did you become an artist?” Henry teases you as he tries to sneak a peek at your sketchbook, gaining a push from you.

“I already told you, this is for therapy. I won’t show you shit.” Closing the sketchbook, you move around the table trying to look busy as Joel walks in your direction.

You are getting bolder with every new interaction, including bringing your sketchbook for the grief support group just in case you run into him. Not that you would ever share your drawings with him, that would be creepy. Some habits are private, not shared.

 Joel, despite being unaware of the impact he has on you, seems to be getting more comfortable in your presence as well. His hair is a little shorter than the last time you saw him, months ago. You miss the curls but enjoy how his square jaw is more evident. His smile is genuine and you can’t help but smile back. There is some calming quality about him, something that makes you want to stay by his side whenever he shows up at these meetings. And this is exactly what you do.

“Want some coffee? Black, right?” You ask but start to pour right away, not waiting for his response.

“Thank you. Have you seen Tess? She said to meet her here.” His eyes don’t avoid yours, holding to the weight of your stare as he tastes the coffee.

“Didn’t she say something about a doctor’s appointment earlier today?”              Henry tries to remember and Joel frowns a bit but quickly vanishes from his face when Frank gets everyone to sit in the circle.

Today is a special meeting, the type you avoid every year, a death anniversary kind of meeting. You know it from before coming here because Hannah made sure to say every five minutes last week. And here she is, looking bright as new even if it is her sister’s death anniversary.

You shouldn’t judge how someone mourns their dead ones, your mom raised you better than that, and yet there is an uncontained jealousy spreading all over your body at how easily Hannah can use a dreadful date as a sweet reminder of her sister’s life.

You are lost on her words, still clinging to your jealousy of how easygoing she is about it. She is speaking nonstop and you wish nothing but to shut her up.

“She planned it, you know. Her funeral. I hated her for it, making my nephew and I think of her in this position. She had been struggling to breathe in her palliative care and still found time to make us understand that her death wouldn’t mean the absence of her in our lives. I try to make him still feel her around as time goes by.

“This is a buttercup from her funeral wreath, she chose herself the yellow because it was our bedroom color when we were growing up. I saved this one for me, I keep it on my nightstand as if we were still little girls sharing a room.”

The dried flower was sitting delicately in her hands, she held it with such care that you felt bitter for having envied her. There were unshed tears in her eyes, you wondered what was worse: losing a loved one violently, abruptly, or seeing them slowly dying without being able to help?

Being able to say goodbye, to cherish a final moment, was something that you couldn’t have with your mom. What would you say to someone you knew it was about to die? No idea but it is glued to your mind since you realized through the meetings that everyone has a final moment with their loved one, whether they choose or not.

You can’t remember your final words to your mom. You hope it was “I love you”.

Tess joins the meeting in a hurry, sunglasses on even if it is evening. Without a word, she plops next to Joel (who was kind enough to spare a spot next to him) and dismisses any question he might have with a hand before crossing her arms.

His eyes search for yours in a “Do you know something about it?” just to receive a “not a clue” from you. In your slow friendship, you became able to identify the meaning behind his frowns, even more so since Joel appears to be always worried about something.

Hannah finishes her sharing and tucks delicately the dried buttercup back into her purse, with that the atmosphere shifts back to the regular meeting state but your mind drifts to Hannah and her sister's last moments.

Did they plan her final day? Was Hannah with her in her final breath? What were her sister’s final words? Part of you want answers because maybe, just maybe, they won’t make you feel jealous anymore.

Joel’s eyes are boring into yours, you notice as you move from Hannah’s purse back to him. The perpetual frown is there, now asking you “Are you okay?” and you nod just once in response. He doesn’t take it as true but gets his attention back to Frank as the man starts to speak.

“Thank you, Hannah. Bringing with you the buttercup was very sweet, thank you for sharing.” Frank affirmation dawns on you, the woman brought with her the last connection with her sister from such a private space of her life and you are here feeling jealous.

Your hand goes straight to the necklace resting on your neckline. The small starfish pendant that your mother gave to you as a graduation gift, “You’ll always be my star, baby” she said as she hugged you. What if you lost it one day? Would you also lose another part of her?

“Tess, glad you could get here in time. The space is yours.” Frank smiles sweetly to a groaning Tess.

“Yeah, okay. Let me just, sh-,” she angrily moves in her chair and gets a flyer from her back pocket, shoving it in Joel’s hand to move around. “Santa Lucia Hospital is low on blood donations, again. It wouldn’t be a surprise to some of you the amount of times I went on emergency and needed one of those. So yeah, I spoke with Frank and Henry earlier, we’re thinking about doing something to help their campaign to get more donors.”

Henry’s arms are resting on his knees as he nods to Tess’ words. “If you can donate, please do. One bag can help up to three people.”

He once lost his baby brother to sickness too, just like Hannah. You never questioned Henry about his final words to Sam, just like you never envied him for being able to say goodbye. You saw behind his actions how much Sam’s presence was a ghost he was still struggling to deal with. It made so much sense that he, from all the people in the grief support group, would help this cause.

“You can count on me for it.” You spoke right away, but the same second that a smile appeared on your lips, it froze as you noticed a stare exchange between Frank, Henry, and Tess. “What?”

“This is a state campaign. The hospital receives people from all over Texas, they’ll be holding the main donation in Houston. At the beach.” Frank stated with a sad smile.

You faded little by little. Most of the group knew about your situation, except a few people like Joel who was frowning at you in anticipation. 

“It's okay, guys. Really. I can donate at the hospital here in Austin, maybe help with the logistics overall before the campaign day?” It was fine, it was. At least you tried to tell yourself that as you held once more the starfish pendant.

“That would be lovely, I’m sure we’ll need as much help as possible.” Frank tried to amend it before choosing another person to speak.

Later on, when everyone was getting ready to leave, you felt a warm hand on your shoulder. Turning around, you faced Joel somewhat closer than you have ever been to him before. You tried to keep your cool hoping he didn’t notice.

“Tess asked me to tell you that if you need help delivering the materials for the campaign, you can use my truck.” He said almost whispering, like a secret that only you could hear.

“Thanks, Joel. Can I have your number? So I can sort out the logistics.” You tried hoping for a yes and received an eager nod.

In a weird circumstance, you met Joel on a Friday. You had to check your calendar a few times, just to make sure, but yes, he would meet you soon enough on a Friday morning, 8 am.

He cleared his whole day to focus on Tess’ campaign, you knew they were best friends and it just reinforced that. His truck was parked in the university lot, near the lab where you were still finishing some analysis as you waited for him.

He knocked at the glass window, gaining your attention. You made a quick gesture for him to wait before proceeding to take the gloves and your coat before walking out the door.

“Hey, Joel. Thank you for coming by to get everything, I put the stuff in the office, c’mon.” You started to guide him through the university’s corridor, but he was still looking into the lab from the window. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, let’s go,” he quickly replied following your steps. 

“It’s these t-shirts and the stress balls, I put everything in that corner.” You pointed to the other side of the room, as you opened the door for him to enter. 

Joel’s eyes were taking in the wall decor: your mom’s sea animal drawings, some shells at the table close to the exposed shark cranium. The office screamed marine biologist, or at least that you should be out there at the sea.

He must have noticed and kept to himself, too polite to get in your business. The comfortable silence filled the room as you collected all the materials before making the way back to the truck, but you could feel him thinking about it. Why the hell would a woman who studies the sea and their animals have a problem with being at the beach?

You faced that question whenever someone asked you to do on-site research, which you would politely recuse. For years the head professor of the department tried to tag you along, but you would say a harsh no. You were happy with reviewing papers, doing your best at the university’s lab, avoiding the sea breeze directly on your face.

Joel glanced once or twice at your face as you kept your eyes staring in front of you, too afraid of his reaction to your small secret.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us? I can give you a ride.” He asked simply, opening the truck so you could put everything there.

“Yeah, I’m sure. Send my love to everyone, will you?” With a smile, you tried to get your shit together. 

He smiled back before hopping in the driver's seat, leaving you alone with your thoughts and memories. Is not like you couldn’t get back to the beach, you could. The sand between your toes, the water splashing around, how the boat moves between the waves… You missed everything dearly, but couldn’t be there. Not yet, at least.

The day went by, nothing new happened. When you getting ready to leave the university, your phone lit up with a new notification from Joel’s number.

Got a big one for your collection, x

 He wrote with an image of a big pink shell, almost the size of his hand, attached. A grin appeared on your face automatically, as if it was the first time you saw one of those.

I love it! It’s so pretty! Thank you, you wrote back still shocked he took his time to go shell searching for you. 

Maybe this is why you decided to open those 12 boxes, to create room for new objects and the memories they represent as you live.

“You are late,” Grandpa mumbles as you enter the room. There is a gift carefully wrapped in your hand but he doesn’t care, he is too busy staring at your face in search of a motive.

“Yes, I am. Got caught up on work, sorry.” You place the gift next to him not minding to justify your actions longer, he hates excuses even when they are true.

Today isn’t the case. Deep down you know he knows you lied about work, too much time in a family event without her doesn’t sit right with you. She was the glue between you all, conversations don’t run as easily as before.

You already greeted everyone when entering the house, from your uncle to your cousins who still give you a sympathetic look at these family gatherings. They can sense your discomfort from afar, no matter how much you try to sound interested in their lives you can’t keep up with them, you can barely keep up with Grandpa.

There’s laughing and chattering next door, your uncle is retelling some old family joke. You can almost hear the sound of her laughing with them. Grandpa must read your mind as unwraps the gift.

“You know, Abby’s favorite spot to hide was behind the curtains of that window. I could always find her there after a long day. I think I use here as a hiding place too, she found a good spot for clearing the mind.”

His voice was soft just like his gaze between you and the paper he was tearing apart, revealing a picture in a gold frame. You didn’t hesitate to frame a picture of your mom when a girl leaning from behind these curtains as a birthday gift after Uncle Michael's commentary.

“Found it in one of her boxes, I think she stole it from grandma. Thought it should be here in your office, not in a cardboard box in my storage room.” 

Grandpa nodded as his thumb was caressing the little girl’s face. Her toothless grin, the dimple on her cheek, everything made Grandpa travel back in time.

“I took this photo, did you know that? She lost her tooth earlier that day and felt ugly without it. Found her here and took some photos as she giggled, showing that beautiful smile.” His other hand found yours, holding it tightly. “Thank you.”

“Happy birthday, Grandpa.” You replied ignoring the tightness in your throat as you watched his face lighten up. “Do we still have cake?”

He placed the frame at his desk, facing the window’s curtains, and got up from the chair guiding you to the laugh in the kitchen. The cake with candles signing 84 was right in the middle, you scootch yourself to a corner as everyone found a space around the kitchen’s island to sing Happy Birthday. Glancing around, you made mental notes about the smiles on their faces, the lightness of your grandpa’s eyes looking back at his family. He was living the moment, not holding on to the past just like a second ago.

When Grandpa blew out the candles, you made a wish too: to allow yourself to feel peace, not just longing.

previous chapter | next chapter

Taglist: @islacharlotte, @anoverwhelmingdin, @aquanatalie

#joel miller #tlou fanfiction #joel miller fic #joel miller x original character #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x you #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal fanfic #the last of us #the last of us hbo #wednesday series

[shadow-pixelle]

The snippet continues...

Part one is here, and part two is here.

I've actually had this bit done for a while now, and I've got another couple of scenes ready to go. Plus I've started figuring out how we got here and some of the other worldbuilding stuff, too.

Might need to actually give this AU a name sometime soon.

Until then, though, enjoy the next chunk of things!

--

Danny felt a little bad for how quickly he relaxed once Hood was out of sight. It wasn’t like it was the guy’s fault that his core was fucked up.

But still, the pressure of not giving in to all his instincts calling for him to take the kid and run had been… difficult. Especially considering the atmosphere of the room.

He hadn’t been wrong earlier that kidnapping was a bad idea, right now.

Sam and Tucker both relaxed as well, which made Danny feel a little better about his reaction, and took their hands from where they were grabbing him. It wouldn’t have helped if he’d decided to say fuck it and lunge, but the pressure of them holding onto him had helped him remember not to phase into intangibility and portal out.

The tension wasn’t much better, though.

Nightwing was frozen, reaching out towards where Hood had ran like he could somehow grab the guy’s shoulder and stop him from bolting. The others in the room- Red Robin, Robin, Batman- were just as still; the two Robins staring at Danny, Batman staring at nothing.

Batman.

There was a twinge in the air, in their bonds, from Sam. She wanted to strangle him, and honestly, Danny wasn’t too inclined to stop her right now. That was probably the Protection spirit talking, really, rather than any sort of logic, but hey, sue him. He was a halfa and his Obsession was just as there as any other ghost. That meant keeping people safe.

And that was before he got into any of the Ghost King shit.

He felt Tucker reach around Danny’s back and grasp Sam’s elbow, apparently sensing both her wish for murder and Danny’s general lack of care.

“I think we should go.” Tucker said, quickly but quietly, in Danny’s ear. He huffed a little, but nodded, transforming back into his ghost form with a flicker. It would be a good idea to let everyone cool down after that, plus it would get Sam away from her current plant food target.

The shift seemed to snap the Bats out of it, at least a little. Nightwing snapped over to look at them, and Red Robin made a small sound. “Go?”

“And let you… process.” Danny said, wrapping his tail around Sam’s waist. She huffed, a sharp and violent sound, but finally relaxed entirely into him rather than preparing to snap, which was good. “I understand that there was a lot of information there, that you likely want time to think through.”

Tucker leaned a little forward again, a small nudge, and Danny nodded, knowing what he wanted. It was easier to focus on their Grief bonds now, with Hood’s core not in the room and making it hard to think beyond instincts if they weren’t talking.

“We’ll make contact with you again in a few days, or you can contact us.” He added. It wouldn’t be hard, Tucker had been working on figuring out some kind of link to them since they arrived here, and being in their home base would’ve helped. “But for now I think it would be best if we left.”

“But-” Nightwing glanced in the direction Hood had ran again, then back to them. Sam softened, a little, at the display of care, the air crackling with it.

“We’ll keep an eye out for him, and discuss the situation with our people.” She told him. “Don’t worry. We’ll find a way to help.”

“Thank you.” Nightwing said, voice cracking. Danny waited a moment, to see if any of them had anything else to say, then cloaked both his Griefmates in invisibility and intangibility in the same moment, moving to grab a more firm hold of Tucker and tightening his tail around Sam.

The Batman still wasn’t saying anything, wasn’t even moving, and Danny would’ve been more concerned if he’d had the room, but-

It had been a lot, and he was tired. More tired than he expected, just holding back the need to run away with Hood bundled between them.

And he still needed to call the Council, too, which was always going to be a nightmare.

A portal would have been too obvious, so Danny just flew straight up instead, pulling both his partners with him, and passed into the rock. From below them, there was a faint echo of something being thrown, and Nightwing’s voice shouting, “What the hell, B-?!” Danny winced a little and flew faster, all three of them keeping silent until they were well in the air- above the massive mansion above the Bat’s base, which was a wild thing even when they were used to the Mansons- and starting back towards the lights of the city.

“I’ll go and look for him.” Sam said, after a few minutes of flying. “I don’t- it’ll be hard, but I’ll be able to handle it.”

Danny would be the best to find Hood, with his ghost sense and the few powers the Crown granted him sometimes, but he was also the worst, because of his status as a halfa and Protection spirit. Tucker could probably do it just as well as Sam could, but his talents meant bunkering down with their computer setup and searching that way would be better than him looking in person.

So Danny just nodded. “Alright. Let’s go back to the apartment, first, and we’ll get one of the whistles out for you. I need to go to the Realms, so I won’t be able to make portals for you, but you can call Cujo to do it instead.”

“You think he’ll want to come to the Realms?”

Danny shrugged, a little. “Maybe. I think… he’s scared, probably. And I don’t think this place is safe for him.”

“The city or the dimension?”

“Not sure, yet. We’ll have to look into it more. But I don’t think it matters, whether it’s the city or the dimension. I don’t think this place is safe for him, and I think he might be scared. Admittedly he might be scared of us, which is bad, but I’m hoping he’ll let us try to help even if he is scared of us.”

“I’ll try to answer his questions, if he’s got any.” Sam frowned audibly, and both Danny and Tucker chuckled. They knew full well how difficult it was for Sam to tolerate people for any length of time, and explaining things was a nightmare for her if people didn’t listen, so hopefully Hood wouldn’t end up on the wrong end of her patience at all.

“Drop me off at the apartment too.” Tucker put in. “I’ll man the computers and see if I can find Hood anywhere on the cameras in the city.”

“Thanks, Tuck.” She smiled up at him. “I think I can guess where he went? But having some kind of eyes in the sky would be good.”

“You do?” Danny asked, looking down so he could raise an eyebrow at her. “How?”

“You know we thought there was a Haunt here?”

“Yeah, that Park Row place.” Danny nodded slowly, then paused. “Oh. You think that’s it?”

“I mean, it’d make sense, right? A ghost’s haunt always feels a little bit like them, and with Hood’s core as torn up as it is…”

Tucker nodded against Danny’s chest, humming. “Yeah, that would make sense. I didn’t think of that.”

“That’s what we’re for.”

“Ok, so Tucker back to the apartment, Sam to grab a whistle for Cujo and then out the door, and I’m off to the Realms.” Danny sighed a little. “Great. You guys get all the fun jobs. I get to enjoy fighting with the Council for like a week trying to make sure they don’t declare war or something while we’re still investigating. That’ll be just our luck.”

“Eh, I’m sure you can do it. They like you, after all.”

Danny just sighed again.

The rest of the trip back into the city and towards the apartment they’d rented wasn’t long or difficult, especially not when flying, and Danny easily phased through the window into the building proper. The second he let go of his Griefmates, they were off; Tucker went straight for the pile of tablets and PDAs and laptops that he’d built up, starting them up all at once with a push of power, while Sam went for the bedroom and their lockbox full of ghost stuff, coming back with a silver whistle that she tucked down the front of her dress so only the chain was showing.

“Want a lift?” He asked, and Sam laughed.

“No, I’ll be fine. Get moving, your Highness, you’ve got places to be.”

“Fiiiiiine.” Danny sighed again, flopping backwards dramatically just to see them laugh, and opened a portal to his Lair.

The feeling of being at home again settled over him like a weight, and he took a moment to shake himself out and settle into the feeling before starting to move.

Luckily, there were protocols and stuff for this kind of thing. And even more fortunately, Fright Knight was nearby and not roaming like he could have been. Danny barely got the doors open from his portal room into the main Lair before the Knight was there, hovering not far into the hall.

“Fright Knight.” Danny inclined his head, pulling at his core. The Ring and Crown formed with only a small amount of fuss- his living half causing them to complain, he knew- though he didn’t bother with any of the rest of the regalia he’d created in the past for situations like this. As strange as it sounded, this felt like something he had to approach more as Phantom, the Protection spirit and halfa, rather than the Ghost King, even though he knew he needed the Crown and Ring with him.

Instincts like that were strange, sometimes.

“Prince Phantom.” The Autumn spirit replied, saluting him. “Is something amiss?”

“We need to call the Council together, Fright.” He said, a small sigh. Him calling the Crown and Ring would have already started that process, with some of them, but not everyone was going to be in a position to notice that stuff, so it was better to tell Fright Knight so he could help get things going. “We’ve got a really bad situation in that world, and it’s going to need a lot of work.”

“How so, my Prince?” Fright Knight asked, even as his core flickered to call the various underghosts of the Lair to attention.

“The sort of thing where we might be declaring outright war on some people.” Danny told him, and watched the Fright Knight freeze.

“I see.”

#dcxdp #fic writing #my writing #random scenes from the abyss #danny phantom #sam manson #tucker foley #at some point this will get a name i swear #braided fates au

[utilitycaster]

Hi, you've mentioned for a few times that people tend to react harder on everything Liam does compared to other male cast members. Why do you think that happens?

This is a good question, and I think genuinely someone could write an entire graduate thesis on fandom and gender, misogyny and backlashes of hate, and I am not the person to do that for a number of reasons. With that said I think there's a couple reasons Liam gets a lot of hate, but I think it's worth noting that literally every cast member gets a pretty significant amount of hate, and that post-Campaign 1 it's honestly been pretty even, from what I've seen, just coming from different quarters.

The first is that, and people who were around while C1 was running feel free to jump in (yes I understand the irony of me, a person who joined the fandom with the start of C2, saying this), but there is a really ahistoric understanding of the fandom in Campaign 1. It's obviously true that there was a ton of misogyny, particularly towards Marisha and Laura (and probably Ashley was spared the worst of it at the time simply by being absent and not out of any respect) but there was also no small amount of homophobia/biphobia (hating on Liam for playing Vax as an openly bi character, hating on Taliesin for being a bi person). There was also, from what I understand, a not-insignificant amount of backlash hate for Vax being bi but choosing to pursue a romantic relationship with Keyleth rather than Gilmore; and people not liking generally that Vax was on the surface the cool fast rogue guy but also was extremely emotional and explored grief and depression in depth.

(I think there's a similarly ahistoric reading that Travis and Sam were the heroes of the dudebro crowd, and to an extent they were, but the downside is, as I said in my post about Marisha, the dudebro crowd of C1 has, thankfully, waned over time, but the backlash towards it hasn't, and so years later people still don't take Travis and Sam's characters seriously and treat them as stupid jokes, despite that never having been the case. Also the dudebros who liked The Player Who Was Asked To Leave have hated Travis from early on, since is feelings on the matter were pretty transparent.)

Moving into Campaign 2, Caleb was quite popular and the "ew, a man having feelings?" crowd was, as mentioned, drifting away, but you got the Marisha Character Defenders who were mad that sometimes characters argued with Beau, or that sometimes people just preferred Caleb to Beau, and you got shippers (largely Beau and Jester shippers) who were furious about Caleb and Jester as a ship. My own feelings aside re: Caleb and Jester and the shippers thereof and their behavior since that ship was sunk, at least they weren't in the habit of harassing cast members over their music choices or sending death threats. A lot of them assumed Fjord was not interested in romance, so Travis was left out of it until pretty late in the campaign, and a lot of them would not admit to being mad at Laura or Marisha, even though they were, ergo: Liam.

The final reason? Liam is on social media and responds to things. I hate to sound like my parents here, but like...Travis and Taliesin get hate on tumblr but also I don't think either of them pay attention or care, so it's not satisfying to people who like being an asshole. Liam actually responds to this stuff (this is not a judgment, I understand the impulse) so people keep doing it. I don't think Liam is actually swayed by the fandom in his gameplay, but I do think he tries to be generous and kind and good faith on social media and so people attempt to take advantage of it. I think Matt is similarly sensitive to the fans but as DM cannot really address all questions/got over it sooner; and Taliesin, Travis, and Sam are all to an extent openly dismissive or oblivious, so while there's some hate it hits a dead end.

#answered #Anonymous #cr tag

[jedi-enthusiast]

My [ongoing] CodyWan Fic Masterlist

Hello! Sorry that this post is a little late, as I said in another post, I've been busy and it kinda got sidetracked--but it's here now!

This rec list isn't gonna be as long as the other one, since I haven't really had time to get into new fics (life stuff + the work of writing my own fic), but there a still a good chunk of them + a couple are series.

They're gonna be separated into "Ongoing" and "Abandoned" so that way you know what you're getting into and I'll put more info in the description--and yes, I'm recommending a couple abandoned works because I think they're still good and maybe with enough support the authors will decide to continue. Either way, they're good fics.

Ongoing

shoulder the sky by @shootingstarpilot

Have I already recced this series? Yes. Am I still reccing it again? Also yes.

I seriously cannot rave enough about how awesome and well done this fic is, and no amount of me harping on it will ever do it thejustice it deserves. This fic has made me laugh, cry, get really pissed at the characters, and it has me waiting (im)patiently for every update--like, every single day I check Ao3 and it's just to check if this fic has updated.

It handles Jedi and Clone culture beautifully and adds in so much interesting world building, it perfectly balances out the fluff with the angst, it handles grief and PTSD very well, and so many other things! The author is also honestly just very sweet and even takes time out of his day to reply to as many comments as possible (which is insane, because there are always like 70+ comments on every chapter).

The Emperor and His Mandalorian by wanderingjedihistorian (RangerJedi67)

Technically I think this would be considered finished, but the author has added a new work to the series every couple months since I found it, so I'm adding it here just in case.

It's a Sith!Obi-Wan AU where Obi-Wan kicks Palpatine's ass and becomes Emperor and marries Cody, son of Manda'lor Jango Fett, as an agreement when Mandalore surrenders to him. I honestly really like how this fic handles Obi-Wan as a Sith and how that affects his actions and relationships with others, as well as Cody being a sort of "balance" for Obi-Wan's dark tendencies.

I'm not even a big fan of Sith!Obi-Wan fics, but this series is the one that got me to start reading some of them--so it definitely comes recommended!

no one left to sing to by slotmachines_fearofgod

This fic is a really interesting take on what would happen in TCW if Cody took more of an active role in the story. I love the author's take on Cody's character and how both his duty to his brothers and all the Kamino bullshit effects how Cody handles Obi-Wan and his feelings towards him.

Also the ending of the most recent update had me screaming and crying at my computer.

The art of living anyway by Itstwointhemorningwhyamiawake

A "Rex is Force-sensitive" fic that follows Cody and Obi-Wan's relationship as well. This fic is pretty new, so I don't really know where it's going, but the first two chapters have been amazing so far!

Abandoned

the sun is just a star by clementines_and_colorful_things

It's hard to give this fic a description that does it justice, but it's honestly really really good. It's basically a slow burn that follows Obi-Wan and Cody through TCW and, according to the tags, would eventually lead to Order 66 happening differently than in RotS.

More Than Blood by generalekenobi

Where Order 66 happens a bit differently and Cody and Obi-Wan end up on the run with baby Luke and Leia, having to masquerade as a Mandalorian couple to do so (uh-huh, yep, totally fake--them have feelings for each other? never).

I really love how this fic gives Cody agency and lets him go "no, we're not doing that, try again" and actually effect the story's outcome. It makes the story a lot more interesting and adds to the dynamic between Cody and Obi-Wan--both relationship-wise and in their newfound mission in taking care of the twins.

I Can Barely Recall (but it's all coming back to me now) by Shortcuts_make_long_delays

Ok, so I don't know if this fic is abandoned or just taking a while to update, so I just put it here--just be aware of that.

This is a Modern!AU where Cody and Obi-Wan used to date, but broke up due to something that keeps being hinted at but not overtly stated (and fuck, I just wanna know what happened! It's killing me!), and now Cody meets his ex "Ben" again when he turns out to be Obi-Wan, Anakin's older brother.

This fic is really interesting and well written and, like I said before, I really just want to know wtf the accident is--the suspense is killing me! Ahhhhhh!

Honorable Mention

An honorable mention for Not This Crude Matter by thebitterbeast

This fic was gonna be apart of the "ongoing" section, but the final part was posted like right after I posted my finished CodyWan rec list.

This series isn't just centered around Cody and Obi-Wan, but I still think it handles their relationship--and other relationships--beautifully. It centers mainly around Jedi culture and it's honestly one of my favorite takes on it. I can't recommend this series enough!

#ao3 fanfic #codywan #codywan fanfic #star wars #fanfic #codywan fic recs #fic recs #I hope you guys like this list as much as the last one #show fic authors some love #they deserve it

[kafkaoftherubbles]

Does Fushi's Ability to Revive People Ruin The Story? // 不死的复活能力是否崩坏了故事的世界观与主题？

I wrote a whole essay by accident while musing about someone else's question on Discord. I decided to post the stuff here, too, as a record for future versions of me.

I think the revival ability introduces new contemplative angles to a story about life, death, rebirths, and living forever.

The theme of immortality, as well as death and grief, are not new. A lot of them ended up being cautionary tales, and a lot ended up being about the inevitability of death and mourning, too. 

Though many of these stories are also interesting and thoughtful, I also think they are very thoroughly explored. It's hard to spin new ideas out of molds that have existed as long as humans had begun telling stories to each other. What can you say that hasn't already been said?

So I think that's where Fushi's revival power really works. Instead of the themes and ideas most of us have likely gotten used to, Oima added a rarer angle to her exploration. In fact, she kinda subverted the idea that Fushi was "just an immortal being who could kinda create things" and revealed to us that they had always meant to be a Creator-in-Training. Immortality is just one aspect of his "conditions". 

On the other hand, I think one of the reasons why a good few people don't like this revival/resurrection thing is because it betrays a certain expectation of the story--at least, according to what I've seen from detractors.

Seems like a lot of people hopped into the story because it started out "tragically beautiful." It's got this thing about life and death from the eyes of an immortal, and so it's easy to immediately assume certain expectations based on previous similar stories: the pains of being an immortal, the tragic cycle of life and death, the loneliness of those left behind, etc.

But, honestly, the idea that death is "final" and "irreversible" was already shattered when "rebirth" was introduced. I suspect it was less of a point of contention because rebirth introduces angles that are still congruent to people who wanted to read about "the tragic beauty of life", as well as being somewhat familiar in pop culture. In Hinduism and Buddhism, for example, attachment is what causes reincarnation (former) and rebirth (latter). Hayase's rebirths are basically that—attachment-caused. It also sets up a mortal foil (as opposed to immortal foil, i.e. the Nokkers) to Fushi, and flows into a story of Hayase+Left Hand Nokker's karma/lives intertwining with Fushi's. 

However! When "revival" was introduced, there are a lot more people who didn't like it or are hesitant. It completely breaks any expectations they had for this story. Death becomes less of a finality and more of a choice. The immortal now has a bunch of immortal friends--not even in the rebirth/reincarnation way, but as "themselves." If the story isn't gonna be about Fushi grappling with the biggest philosophical questions on life and death, then what can they still grapple with as the story goes on? It probably feels like a thematic betrayal to the detractors, right? 

Someone on the Discord group also pointed out a real good point: it made some viewers/readers wonder why they shed their tears and grieve when these people came back in the end. Maybe there is a sense of emotional devaluement?

In my opinion, the Present Era answered the question of "What can Fushi still grapple with?". Instead of grappling with issues of death and life's grand tragedies, Fushi is now forced to grapple with life's details. For example: how do you love? The fuck is love?

Do relationships and companionships—no matter how much impact and weight they possess when you have them—still wane and end, even if the people's physical death is out of the question? What happens if people "move on"? What happens when people "don't need you anymore"?

What sort of outlook on life should one form—how does one know if it's right or wrong?

What is a perfect life?

I think the revival ability allowed these newer themes to surface, and be framed in novel ways. It also works well because a good few characters used for these themes are Fushi's revived friends, with all that history entailed. It also makes for an interesting comparison to the latest Hayase-styled rebirth in the Present Era, because she is an extension of Kahaku to the present and inherits all that karmic conditions, and yet unlike Fushi's revived friends who are "themselves", she is also her own slate and not-Kahaku. And of course, the new dance with them Nokkers...

But people who wanted to see TYE for bigger philosophical questions could find these musings too small and banal. I kinda sympathize with them. This ain't what they believed they were promised. 

Ultimately though, I hope the detractors can get to terms with the shake-up and read the story through another lens, or adopt a different idea of what this story is about. The way I interpret it from the get-go is that To Your Eternity has never been (just) about death or "the beautiful tragedy of life". I thought it has always been about the struggles of being human. A Creator, a Creator-in-training, supernatural alien-souls, people who are born in bad times, people who are dehumanized as monsters, criminals and their offsprings, people who are raised in messed-up families, robot dolls... All of them are unified by this same quest.

Hence, I personally don't feel thematically betrayed because it stays true to this backbone. In fact, I'm happy that its exploration diversifies.

Thank you for reading my ramble.

#fumetsu no anata e #to your eternity #to you the immortal #manga spoilers (light) #tye #fnae #another garrulous one

[xoxoemynn]

My great aunt passed away last week. She was 104 so this wasn’t a tragedy, but did very much feel like an end cap to the Summer of Grief. And given she was 104, it still just feels Very Weird that she’s no longer here.

Work was busy in part because just projects were messy, but also the colleague I work most closely with was out so I was doing part of her role. And then my CEO, bless her, wanted to help, but it just felt more micromanagey than I’m used to. And I was also helping my family with funeral stuff so…worked some weird hours, generally stressed.

Then tl;dr work fucked up and on Friday I found out I had to cancel all my upcoming PTO requests for the rest of the year. Honestly more upset about not having off for the finale than anything else.

Today was going to a show with my parents that I didn’t really want to already, but even more so after this week, but mom’s been struggling with retirement and it’s good to get her out of the house.

The ONLY thing getting me through was knowing when I got home I could chill out and write some clock boys.

……an hour before I left for the show my computer, which had already been on its last legs (shit battery life, only one port works) but I thought was holding up okay, COMPLETELY died.

I feel melodramatic for whining about all this, but it’s already been a very rough few months and all these little things feel so much bigger now and I feel like my resilience is at like a 3 out of 10.

So anyway, if anyone has an in with the universe and can get it to chill out and give me a fucking break, I’d appreciate it. 🥺❤️‍🩹

#personal #I did order a new laptop and it should be here tomorrow morning #and I have my tablet so it’s not the end of the world #none of this would be the end of the world regardless #I am just sad and tired and overwhelmed and mad at the world #and understanding Ed’s instinct to just throw a blanket over his head more and more

[athenasparrow]

No. 20 - Old | Jily Micro March

Thank you for the prompt @jilymicrofics 😘

Summary: In which Euphemia isn't the only one in the family who can incite shenanigans : )

Read on AO3 | 1533 words

WhatsApp Chat

Private : Lily Evans, Kingsley Shaklebolt

Kingsley Shacklebolt : So how did it go?

And I need to know immediately bc not sure what to buy...

Ice cream to cheer you up?

A bottle of wine to drown your sorrows?

Boxing gloves to kick some ass?

Lily Evans : Can I choose all of them?

Kingsley Shacklebolt: That bad?

Lily Evans : And worse : (

You should be lucky you found a nice man.

They’re all gone.

Not a single good one left!

Two bottles of wine?

Kingsley Shacklebolt: I did snag a good one ; )

There are still a few out there Lils! We will find you one.

Two bottles? Easy peasy lemon squeezy

Lily Evans: Doubt it

Yes two, to fix my current state: stressed, depressed lemon zest 

Or simply wallow in it.

Haven’t decided yet.

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WhatsApp Chat

Private: Lily Evans, Alice Longbottom

Alice Longbottom : Hi Darling!

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I told him to wave to his godmother, but apparently pesky motor function isn’t happening yet.

Lily Evans: You don’t know how much you just brightened my day! Look at those chubby cheeks!

Don’t insult my godsons motor skills - he’s only three months old.

He’s got the best motor skills ever. Give him big kisses.

Alice Longbottom: Why does your day need brightening? Are you alright?

There’s a reason you’re his favourite.

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Oh look, that sort of looks like a wave

Lily Evans : Nothing to worry about, just another bad date

King is coming over late to help me wade through the “grief”

He’s bringing lots of wine.

I’m fine really, this dating life is just getting quite old, you know?

I might just take a break from it all.

That’s totally a wave Xxxxxxx

Alice Longbottom: Oh you poor thing : (

That sounds amazing, I am jealous of you Lily!

Eh I feel that, but once the right one comes around it won’t feel so tedious, I promise x

Want to come over this weekend and see Neville?

Lily Evans: You better be right Al!

You know I do.

I’ll bring lunch : )

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WhatsApp Chat

Private: Petunia Dursley, Lily Evans

Petunia Dursley: <attachment>

Please choose a gift from my list for my birthday

Don���t use red wrapping paper, it’s hideous

Lily Evans : Red paper coming right up See you Saturday Tuney.

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WhatsApp Group Chat

Members: Kingsley Shacklebolt, Blake Rathborne, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin

Remus Lupin: Does anyone happen to have an extra wallet with their stuff from last night?

Blake Rathborne: Nope, nothing here sorry

Didn’t think you’d leave your wallet in your pocket Remus.

Gay clubs get a bit handsy

Sirius Black: Remus loves it when I get handsy with him ; )

Remus Lupin: That is irrelevant since it wasn’t, in fact, my wallet

James’ is missing.

Kingsley Shacklebolt: Well that makes more sense.

Straight men, honestly.

Sirius Black: LOL

Remus Lupin: ????

I’m going to assume nobody knows about it then??

I’ll email lost and found at the club on the off chances it turns up.

And break the news to James that he’ll have to cancel his credit cards.

Kingsley Shacklebolt: Posh bastard.

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WhatsApp Chat

Private: Sirius Black, Kingsley Shacklebolt

Kingsley Shacklebolt: Did you post it?

Sirius Black: Yup Did it this morning

Should arrive over the weekend

Can’t give Remus time to get suspicious

WhatsApp Group Chat

Members: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter

Sirius Black: Rise and shine sleepy heads

Good news Prongs, found your wallet

James Potter: After all that shit you gave me last night you have it?

Remus Lupin: That’s great. I’ll call the club when they open and tell them to ignore my email

Sirius Black: Found, not have

Club has posted it to you

Remus Lupin: A club we live fifteen minutes away from has posted us something?

James Potter: lol yeah, I’ll just go grab it now

Sirius Black: dunno too late I think

Said they’d posted it

James Potter: Okay fine

But with my wallet gone, you’re buying me lunch Padfoot

Sirius Black: I’ll be there in 10

------------------------------------

WhatsApp Chat

Private: Lily Evans, unknown

Lily Evans: Hello! Realise this may seem a bit random, but I think someone just accidentally mailed me your wallet by mistake?

I hope this is the right phone number, but if it’s not and you know a “James Potter” could you send through his contact details please? - Lily

Unknown: Oh, hello Lily! Yes, I’m James. So sorry about that not sure how it happened.

I can come by and pick it up?

A relief to know where it is.

Unless you’re not comfortable with me coming

I can meet you somewhere

Or feel free to leave it on a bench or something

Hmm, that sounded like a drug deal

*Unknown number changed to James Potter

Lily Evans: You can come by, it’s fine

I’m sure we can manage without the drug deal

This is me <maps.google.com/droppedpin>

James Potter: But what if I’m a serial killer???

I’ve always wanted to be part of an illicit drug drop

I’m pretty sure my mum would murder me though

But might be a rather exhilarating experience 

I’m on my way

I am happy to meet on the street if you’re more comfortable!

Lily Evans: I’m pretty certain serial killers don’t announce themselves like that

And wouldn’t suggest public spaces for meetings

And lol, wouldn’t you be into killing men anyways?

Incase you didn’t know, I’m a woman,

Unless your sexuality has arisen from a deep-seeded hatred for women?

Exhilarating for a moment maybe, I’m sure the night spent in jail would bring the excitement right down.

Neighbours are moving today so just come on up. 

Apartment 526

James Potter: What? I’m lost now

Lily Evans: What??

James Potter: Why would I be into killing men or hate women?

I’m in your lobby

I’m coming up

Lily Evans: Because of the sexual aspect of serial killers?

You know? Because you’re gay you would kill men???

James Potter: I think there’s been a misunderstanding here

I’m not gay

Hold on I’m on your floor

Is it okay if I come to your door?

Cut for eventual smut

Lily frowned at her phone and moved to her entrance, grabbing the package from the console and heaving the door open.

She glanced to right to see a a very fit man with ruffled curly hair, black jeans and bright hazel eyes that danced behind his square glasses.

A very gorgeous man who was apparently not gay.

“Hi” she called “I’m just over here”

He threw a lopsided grin at her and started making his way over.

“I’m Lily” she said extending her hand and smiling at him when he reached her door.

“James. As you already know” he said grinning ruefully.

“Not gay James” Lily corrected him, biting her lip as a laugh bubbled out of her.

“Yes. Why did you think that?” James said, his brow furrowed “I’ve never been told I give off a gay vibe”

“You don’t” Lily said “but…well…look” she extended the postmarked package his wallet had arrived in.

“What?” he said glancing down at it.

“Well, the return address is a gay club” she said laughing “I’m sorry I made assumptions, but”

“Oh yeah right, of course” James said laughing awkwardly “nope, definitely straight, just there with my mates”

“It’s a fun club” Lily agreed “my friend Kingsley loves it. Used to go there every weekend when he was single”

“Kingsley Shacklebolt?” James asked suddenly.

“Yeah, that’s him!” Lily said smiling “I think he was there this last weekend with his boyfriend. Did you meet him?”

“Yeah, I’m Sirius Black’s brother”

“Oh I have heard about you. I suppose I just didn’t put the dots together” Lily said smiling at him. God, he was fit .

A clap of thunder alerted Lily to the fact that the sky had suddenly decided to open and her sofa was about to get drenched.

“Shit” she cursed running to yank the window closed.

It was easier when a second pair of joined, helping her move the old window back to latch closed.

Lily felt her breath hitch as she registreed the hot press of his body against hers.

He seemed to realise he was flush against her.

“Sorry” he said hastily, stepping back to create distance between them.

Lily suddenly felt overwhelmingly hot even though the cool thunderstorm had blown in a draft.

Her eyes flicked over his soft lips where his tongue darted out nervously. Lily had the sudden urge to taste him. She pulled her gaze away to meet his own, only to notice it was darker than when they’d last locked eyes.

Fuck.

Lily wasn’t even aware she’d moved, but her mind came back into her body at the sizzling feel his lips left on hers. 

He was delicious.

She fought the moan he pulled out of her, before giving in when his warm hand slipped under her shirt.

“Shit, you sound amazing” James murmured.

Lily lost herself in his lips until his hand traced a questioning circle around her thigh and she became aware enough of her surroundings that she realised they’d migrated to the couch.

As she pleaded with him to touch her, a faraway thought crossed her mind.

Perhaps dating wasn’t getting old after all.

#jily au #jily #james potter #lily evans #jple #jily love #jily fic #jily microfic #athenasparrow #athena writes march micros #sirius black #remus lupin #Effie is not the only schemer in the family #jily fluff #athena's library #athena's microfics #athena's smut

[beneathashadytree]

Hi Maya I hope your doing well ☺️ Please may I request a oneshot of a voicemail Jotaro would send his s/o while in Morioh ( overall fluff). Thank you & I love your writing 😌🤍

TO FLORIDA, WITH LOVE - JOTARO KUJO X READER

Warnings : This is set right before facing off Kira, similar to canon Jotaro hasn’t told his spouse about the dangerous stuff going on in Morioh, Jolyne is around 7 here, this is not proofread, reader is gender-neutral!

Genre : pure domestic fluff <3

Word count : 0.4K words

Additional notes : Thank you so much for requesting! You’re very sweet 💗 I’m doing well now (though pretty sunburnt🫠), and I feel pretty happy to get back to writing. This is now officially one of my favorite requests. I’m a sucker for soft tsun Jotaro honestly. Hope you enjoy this as much as I did! 🥰

Requests : Are open! Check the rules over here.

Want to support me financially? Here’s my CashApp.

Masterlist

“Hey. Uh, it’s probably late on your end, so I’m leaving this here.

I woke up early today, got some work in. My thesis is nearly complete now, but I think I need a couple of more days. The genus of the starfish here in Morioh is surprisingly more diverse than back home, so there were more species to research here than were in Florida. Give me four days. I have… things to clear up around here, too.

Old man’s getting along decently well with Josuke. Still rubs me the wrong way, but the entire situation’s pretty fucked up. [derisive chuckle] He’s a good kid, though, so hopefully Joseph won’t mess things up with him. He deserves better than that.

One of his friends’ a famous mangaka. Think Jolyne’s gonna like his work? She’s taken an interest in horror recently, hasn’t she? Try subtly bringing it up with her. Let me know if she’d like a signed volume from him.

Is she doing okay at school? Heard she had a science test this week. How’d she do? If she’s struggling, tell her Dad can help her out. She’s just as stubborn as you are, and probably won’t admit that she’s having trouble. If she gives you an attitude, let me know. Can’t have the bratty genes inherited this soon.

[throat clearing] [brief silence]

And… how are you? You probably found some of your favorite foods in the fridge after I left. Made those. Were they any good? Was my first time so… might’ve failed here and there. [lighthearted] Feedback’s appreciated, but keep the complaints to a minimum.

How’s work been? If your boss is being too much of a bitch, we can always find you another job. You’re already overqualified. Anyone would be lucky to have you.

[more awkward silence] [rustling sounds]

It feels weird. Haven’t slept alone since… since 1990, I think it was. [breathes out laugh] Think you’ve been stuck with me since then. There’s that one time when we fought a couple of years ago, and you told me to sleep on the couch. Didn’t tell you back then, but Jolyne snuck out of bed that night to keep me company.

What I’m trying to say is… ‘m missing you. ‘Course, I miss Jolyne too, but this is different. Good grief. [sigh] What have you done to me? I can’t stop thinking of you, even after all this time.

[throat clearing]

Anyways, I’ve got shit to do now. It’s almost noon here. [pause] If I… when I get back, let’s go out on a date on Friday night. Just the two of us. Alright?

[mumbling]

Take care. Love you.”

Taglist: @mrsgiovanna @blondeboyfriend @boorishbrambling

#imagine #oneshot #fluff #anime #domestic #jjba #jojo #jojo’s bizarre adventure #jotaro kujo #kujo jotaro #jotaro #jotaro x reader #jotaro kujo x reader #kujo jotaro x reader #jotaro fluff #jotaro kujo fluff #kujo jotaro fluff #jojo x reader #jojo fluff #jojo oneshot #jojo part 4 #diamond is unbreakable #diu #jojo’s bizarre adventure diamond is unbreakable #morioh #jolyne cujoh #jolyne #jolyne kujo

[onceuponadreamgirl]

TWs below the cut: medication, pet death, suicide, blades, knives

This is here for anyone who needs it (but really every word is for @blackllghtburns). This gets really heavy so I would judge carefully when to read it.

Losing my dog Beau to cancer in 2017 was a huge blow but it wasn't the worst time in my life. I can say that confidently now. I was grieving and depressed but it wasn't the worst time in my life.

I can tell this story now, with the benefit of hindsight and years of therapy and perspective. It doesn't hurt anymore. I mean it will always hurt the girl I was but I'm not her anymore. I don't know if that makes sense. If you're here for sense you've come to the wrong girl.

When I was 19 I got an apartment with a friend off campus. I was attending a good university maybe 60-90 minutes away from my parents' (depending on traffic, it is SoCal, after all). I was so happy and I was so excited. Long story less long, she turned out not to be a nice person and had isolated me from all my other friends at school, basically with a mentality of "pick them or me." She was Charismatic™ in that scary way. It was kind of cult-ish the way she demanded loyalty.

Anyway so I was living with this massive bitch several miles off campus I didn't drive or have a car (there was a shuttle that went from near our apartment to the school) and she started to freeze me out. After I had chosen her over all my other friends. She wouldn't speak to me. If there was apartment stuff, she would email me. We shared an apartment and she wouldn't talk to me. I stopped going to class, I stopped leaving the apartment, I stopped showering and getting dressed. I was on medication for depression and had been for a few years but at the time I wasn't really happy with that (I felt, and to their detriment my parents at the time had fueled this concept, that I shouldn't be "relying" on medication) and would often skip my meds. I wasn't drinking or doing drugs but I was so depressed I would black out. Not fall asleep, like once I found myself holding a knife in the bathroom and I don't remember getting it. Scary, scary shit.

I dropped out of school which was a big deal because my entire life had been preparing me to go to college. I disappointed my parents. For the first time in my life, my parents were PROPERLY disappointed in me. I honestly believe if I hadn't dropped out I would have killed myself. It was just a matter of time.

Once I moved back home, I went off of medication completely (under doctor supervision). I played TS2 A LOT. I slept on the floor of my parents' room in a sleeping bag because my mom didn't want me left alone. I'll be honest, I don't have a lot of memories from that time. Depression that severe does that, you know? I barely left the house but I remember around Christmas (I dropped out in October) going to Hollywood Video with my mom (I feel so old right now). She begged me to go out of the house and I relented. I remember I was standing outside of the store and it was a clear night and I could see more stars than usual (which still isn't a lot, #SoCal). And I felt...empty. Inhuman. Like I wasn't real. And then I had my first panic attack.

ANYWAY, years passed, I went back on a DIFFERENT medication, started therapy, went back to a DIFFERENT school, graduated, etc. In short (ha! this is so long) I GOT BETTER. I changed. I grew. I became someone else. All that stuff I reblog about grief, that's about Beau, but it's also about grieving for my younger self and all she went through. This is the worst thing that ever happened to me but there's a LOT more that I've been through. I was bullied, other stuff I don't want to get into in a public forum, but yeah. My point is (and I'm so sorry this has been so long winded) is that THINGS CHANGE. TIMES END. NEW STUFF BEGINS. I made some great friends, lost some great friends, went on a life changing vacation to London, did SDCC a few times, made some memories. Despite my depression and anxiety and my losses, my life is one worth living now. And yours can be too. Not to be go all girlboss on you but what's meant for you will find you. Things will turn out okay. Your story doesn't end here.

#personal #see trigger warnings above

[nellie-elizabeth]

Outlander: The Happiest Place on Earth (7x02)

Dang, I'm honestly incredibly surprised about some stuff in this episode!

Cons:

As an overall note, this episode just felt incredibly crowded with incident. The fact that the episode in which we learn the end of the Christie storyline, with Allan telling his story and meeting his fateful end, is also the episode in which Brianna and Roger have a baby, discover Mandy's health problem, and leave, and is the episode where we meet adult William for the first time, and is the episode with the fire that's been built up for several seasons... it's just so much to happen all at once! I feel like especially the start of the episode with Allan, coupled with last week's revelations from Tom Christie, all belong to an earlier plot thread that really should have been resolved separately from the Brianna and Roger leaving story, and the Wendigo Donner/fire story.

Mainly, I'm surprised that Roger and Bree are actually going into the future at all, with their kids. That whole plot development in the books is incredibly important, but I thought after they hinted at it and then bailed back last season, they were just going to skip over it entirely. A lot of plot happens in these books, I wouldn't have been surprised if they'd given this whole thing a pass. I am excited to see how it plays out, I guess, but it does make the fact that they decided to go and then changed their minds before, kind of ridiculous.

A couple of small complaints that I keep making... the voiceover still feels clunky in some places, and the actress playing Brianna is an undeniably weak point in terms of performance. There were moments where she did well this episode, but other moments where she felt stilted and out of place.

As a last complaint, part of this is that it's been a while since I've read some of the books, but the whole circumstances around the fire just felt messy and out of the blue? At first we had Wendigo showing up demanding gemstones with his gang of reprobates, but then suddenly Mrs. Bug is involved and shouting about the gold? It was incoherent and strange and made for a shocking episode end, but maybe too shocking, given everything else going on beforehand.

Pros:

I will say though, despite the somewhat muddied ending, I do think Wendigo Donner is a fascinating figure. I loved the sinister nature of his presence in the house, and when Claire told Jamie his name, and Jamie immediately lunged for him, furious, having heard of his involvement with the Browns... that was good stuff.

In all, I did think all the sappy stuff with Bree, Roger, Claire, and Jamie and the kids worked really well. First we get to see Claire and Jamie so excited about their new granddaughter, each telling her what they'll teach her as she grows older - Claire will teach her medicine, Jamie will teach her to ride a horse. And then when it's revealed she has a heart condition, the dawning realization that the one thing they have left to offer her is a way back to the 20th century... it really is heartbreaking. The goodbye moments had everything. Super cheesy declarations of affection and lasting love from everybody. Jamie saying he's proud of Roger Mac. Bree telling her dad about Disneyland and saying that he's magical to her. Jamie and Claire embracing their grandson and telling him goodbye. It was a real tearjerker all around.

And I really loved the aftermath with Jamie and Claire too, that sense of life going on, but the weight of their grief hitting them so seriously. Jamie says a line straight from the book about how he will try and go on for Claire's sake, but for his own, he would not. They have been permanently separated from their family, and it's a real tragedy for them all to grapple with. The scene where Claire goes kind of frantic and jumps Jamie, but then breaks down and cries as they contemplate all the people they've lost... that really got to me.

Despite feeling weird as a pacing thing, I did think that the Allan Christie reveal was well-acted and written, the visceral disgust on Claire's face was very clear. And Ian's decision to kill Allan felt so true to his character and what we know of all he's been through. Ian is a character I love from the books but I feel a little less connected to in his show version, but the scene of him and Claire burying Allan together felt like a really strong moment for him.

I've saved the Lord John and William stuff for last, because of course I have. We only get one brief scene with William so far, so it's a little too soon to tell what to think of him, but I love that Brianna just can't stop smiling like a loon when meeting her older brother for the first (and only, as far as she knows) time. And Lord John being so pleased to see her, but also being baffled by her rather forward suggestion that they tell the Ninth Earl of Ellesmere the truth about his parentage, was really funny.

And then of course pardon me while I go on way too long about that John and Jamie scene because my goodness. I don't know how to explain the difference between the vibes here and in the books, because it's hard to pin it down... in some ways I enjoy John a lot more as a character from the books, just because we don't get to spend enough time with him on the show to fully appreciate his nuance, but on the other hand, what we do see of him on the show, I do enjoy a lot. In the books, the vibe between these two men is very complicated. Jamie feels a deep gratitude and affection for John because he has raised William, and he is also aware of John's feelings for him, and so does his best to be respectful and kind while also not being false to his own feelings on the matter. In the show, I swear to god, the vibe is like... they're wistful exes who still love each other but know their love can never be. It's so insane to me that in this scene they're calling each other by first names, and gently regretting that the war must put them at odds, and John placing the gem into Jamie's hands and curling his fingers over his palm... that's romance, okay?

It's so funny because I don't even ship them, I just think it's fascinating that the show has decided to lean in really hard on the idea of there being this fraught, extra tension to this relationship, that these two men love each other in a way that is in some ways indefinable. They essentially share the love of a parent for their child, in William, which positions them as having a partnership all their own. It's such a fascinating dynamic and I can't think of another fictional relationship that I feel this way about. I don't want Jamie to have romantic/sexual feelings for John, but I want him to have... "you are my co-parent and you're such a good dad to our child" thoughts about him, which he canonically does, kind of? Like, John making that joke about "we should be discussing suitable wives for William, not suitable regiments." You should, John? Why on earth would Jamie Fraser actually be involved in those discussions? It's so funny.

And such a tragic, beautiful moment. It happens via letter in the books, Jamie telling John that they must sever all ties. So I was very pleased to see it happen in person here. The lingering shots on both men's faces after they've parted, thinking it likely to be for the very last time... man, in whatever form it takes, Jamie Fraser and Lord John Grey love each other very deeply, and I'm very into it.

That's where I'll stop for now. I was pretty legitimately surprised at Bree and Roger taking off into the future, and I can't wait to see how that plays out in the coming weeks!

8/10

#review #outlander #outlander review

[hyenahunt]

Rouge & Ruby: Warmth and Compassion - 1

Writer: Umeda Chitose

Season: Winter

Characters: Jun, Hiyori

Proofreading: royalquintet (JP) & Skyress (ENG)

Translation: hyenahunt

Hiyori: ...Well, you're a warrior of love, after all. Once you noticed the internal struggle Ibara was battling with, you simply couldn't leave him be.

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Jun: … (Sigh)

Hiyori: Sighing again? Jun-kun, just how many times can you sigh in a day before you're satisfied?

It won't be my fault if your happiness flies out the window! But of course, with me around, I'm sure it'll be in no hurry to leave ♪

Jun: What's your point, exactly.

Jun: ...Oh, it's that thing about happiness escaping whenever you sigh, huh.

Well, since it can hang out around you instead of gloomy ol' me, won't my happiness be pretty happy about that~?

Hiyori: Since it can hang out with me... What, now you're thinking about your happiness's happiness?

We have work as Eve after this, too, so sort yourself out!

Jun: ...I'm sorry. I'll do my best to get myself together when it's time to work.

Hiyori: You've been in this state for a while recently, Jun-kun, and I know you'll switch gears during work, but...

I'd much rather you straighten up and stop moping each and every time we have a spare moment in between. Aren't you tired of being so stuck in your own head?

Jun: It's harder to stay out of my head, y'know~...

Sigh... Maybe I really was kinda outta line with what I said to Ibara, wasn't I?

Hiyori: Good grief. I've long lost count of how many times I've heard you say that by now!

"Maybe I said something outta line~" this, and "Maybe I sounded all full of myself~" that.

The moment something leaves your mouth you can't ever take it back, so you have to take responsibility for what you say, you understand?

Jun: You've got a point there...

Hiyori: Goodness. Well, you've never disagreed with Ibara in this way before, Jun-kun.

I was so intrigued when it happened and looked forward to seeing how it would turn out, but now all your indecisiveness has me rather fed up, honestly.

Hiyori: ...Jun-kun, all you did was share your honest opinion. There's nothing wrong with conveying your feelings, okay?

You were able to say it precisely because you're you, and Ibara's sure to have had his own conflicted feelings on it already.

Jun: ... You're right. If he hadn't, he wouldn't have got up and left like that.

...But still, I didn't make him mad at me, did I? What was up with his attitude back then?

Hiyori: Who knows? I for one certainly don't understand what he's thinking.

After all, even though we're continuing to have a decent amount of work separately as Adam and Eve, we also still have work all together as Eden.

Actually, hang on. We're all living in the same dorm, so if it's truly bothering you so much, why don't you just go talk to him about it?

Jun: Um, well... I mean, we barely look at each other when we're working, let alone talk...

But he's going about work as normal without seeming fazed by it at all, so it's got me wondering if I'm the only one so hung up over this, and —

Ugh, I'm such a mess! What the fuck am I supposed to do?!

Hiyori: Come now, Jun-kun, watch your language.

The fact that you're the one so worked up over this rather than Ibara is really rather amusing, though ♪

Jun: It's not funny, y'know~

... I mean, whenever we have any issues or complaints about anything, we've always just told Ibara, right?

And he'll hear us out, and manage to find some middle ground everyone's happy with, yeah?

Even when dealing with someone as self-centred as you, he'll still always stop to consider things and figure out some kinda compromise...

Hiyori: What was that? I do believe you just said something absolutely uncalled for?

Jun: (completely ignoring him) Man, that guy's actually always doing incredible stuff for us~

Back when we were filming that MV, too... It was thanks to Ibara's honest pep talk that I had the confidence to tackle it head-on.

Hiyori: And back then, I was the only one left in the dark!

Jun: I've apologised over and over already, haven't I? I've already told you I'm sorry for clamming up and not talking to you 'bout it...

Hiyori: You have. Well, I'll stop being all sullen about it, and this time I'll get myself just a touch involved in your little interpersonal problem so you can't leave me out again.

Jun: Um, you were right there with us listening to our convo, so there's no way you'd be left out of this, though...?

Hiyori: Look, it feels different, you understand!

It seems that since then, Ibara's come up with some plans for a new direction to head in. You know how he is. Jun-kun, you ought to move on from this, too.

What Ibara wants to do for Chocolat Fes is for our sake — for Eden, isn't it? It's a wish of his that you may even call a long-held aspiration, really.

That's why Nagisa-kun and I voiced no opposition to his plan. But Jun-kun, you were the only one who pushed back on it.

Jun: …………

Hiyori: I'm sure you can look within yourself to understand why exactly you said something like that, yes?

Jun: ... It just seemed to me that Ibara wasn't completely down with having to work COMP into his plans, I guess. It felt like he was kinda ticked off about it.

And being the kinda person I am, I just... couldn't stand the idea of shit getting in the way of something he's so passionate about.

So without even thinking 'bout it I just went and said I was against it... Then I got a lil' out of line with the things I blurted out after that.

In the end, I wound up getting called annoying.

Hiyori: ...Well, you're a warrior of love, after all. Once you noticed the internal struggle Ibara was battling with, you simply couldn't leave him be.

Jun: Whaddya mean, "warrior of love".

Hiyori: ....Hehe ♪

Back then, I certainly picked up on the feelings you just described, Jun-kun.

But to me, I would guess that the reason why you were able to speak your mind to Ibara is because you have a different perspective on Valentine's Day from him.

Jun: A different perspective of Valentine's Day...?

Hiyori: That's right. I mean, at the time you called Valentine's Day a "tender event filled with love", didn't you?

Unlike Ibara, you don't see it as a battlefield to conquer. Wouldn't you call that a difference in perspective?

Jun: Um... sorta...?

Hiyori: The fact you could say something like that surely means you have an ideal image of what it looks like, no?

Hiyori: Now, I'd like you to tell me all about it. What would a typical Valentine's Day look like to you?

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#ensemble stars #enstars #enstars translation #hyenahunttl #s: rouge and ruby #jun sazanami #hiyori tomoe

[shkika]

I might end up taking u up on that offer this is so so soo fun

I really enjoy it when people make moon mad at fp..like how could she not be yes she cares about fp a lot but siblings don't exactly...do that to eachother very often I think (but maybe they do /j the woes of being an only child)

I think not being able to harm artificer did him good in the end (therapy dog!!) like he would have definitely just wanted to send that thing FLYING into the sun but he couldn't!! he was forced to just deal with it and eventually he realises hey. Maybe this thing isn't so bad... honestly I think he really needed something like that right then given his tendency to push people away (thinking abt how he BLEW UP srs' poor overseer. That made me jump actually i didnt expect it i sat still for long enough to get myself blown up too it was kind of funny...aside from the trek back of course) (ALSO THE ADS HELP thats golden)

Adding onto that like....him being a silly little loser that wants to do everything by himself and the like loving the attention etc I really think that like... the time period he was built in only made it worse??

Like......i feel that being built when he was added to a sort of pressure of needing to feel superior, to not be one of those bugs in mazes. To have something with like a genuine true path ahead instead of blindly grasping for answers

Like...I guess he'd want to prove just how good he is by doing it without any sort of help and he just has so MUCH to figure out by himself that he just...builds that pressure more and more and that's gotta be too much at some point

^^ I like the idea of the triple affirmative stuff happening like...around this point in time (forgive me if my timeline is terribly off) but anyways like..it kind of just fucks up everything for the dude...like all he's worked for is kinda just for nothing so then it leads to everything with the rot as like some sort of last resort. Like he knows the risks but he just cant bring himself to care like he's in such a vunerable state he doesn't think about how it'd affect moon until all of a sudden there's a forced message being sent his way, but even then I guess being younger than like everyone in the group he doesn't fully grasp like oh. This is as bad as it is. Until moons can comes crashing down and hes left infecting himself with the stuff

Anyway you are so very right with the echo actually I haven't thought very much on the shaded citadel but it must have...not been pleasant going through the rains knowing that there's so many others unaffected by it

Sorry this response is so late actually I've been multitasking to all hell but RRAGHGJ squishing the iterators in my hand like stress balls I am so normal about this game

please do! <3 ramble incoming

Moon being angry at Pebbles is fun. I love seeing different interpertations! Though I do think she doesn’t hold actual bitterness towards him in my personal belief.

The idea that she isn’t actually *angry* angry at him makes her very tragic to me. By all means she knows his actions are inexcusable. What she went through was horrifying and painful and she acknowledges that. Nsh even mentions she’s always had way too much patience for him and that she really tried to be a good big sister to him.

So as his big sister and someone who guided him in early days I can see her being unable to feel spite towards him. He fucked up, hes now sick and rotting and it all fills her with grief. It’s all just unfortunate and sad! (definitely see moon being a little hater with salty comments sometimes. as she does but most of her anger is reserved for their shitty parents)

Pebbles desperately wanting to feel superior is something really fun to me!! Absolutely see it! (idk why u went and became close friends with guy who called you dumb and naive but u do you 🤷 maybe u like that. likr OoOo hes the only one that listens to my theories and he calls me dumb <33) We know he learns about what happened to sliver from suns, so I can only assume that happened before he was made..? But the game is vague enough for u to hc it as you want honestly.

What he did was out of desperation for sure! He never wanted to even involve Moon according to what he says while commenting on a pearl by Arti. It was just kind of impossible.

I think what Suns told him just left a big scar on the poor guy. Not only is he being told he never mattered, he has to accept he’ll slowly break down and not even die while still trying to solve their issue he doesn’t even care about. He wanted the feeling of power over his own self back and he wanted to desperately escape. Feeling helpless is the worst.

He thought he could be fast enough and not harm Moon and then failed! He doomed her and got a very bad case of the rot ( consequences of my actions) ((another bracket but the poor fucker tried to cure himself all the way until arti campaign! sad!!)) along with his failure becoming gossip material and a sensation as we learn from spearmaster logs. Which is why I assume he closes all communications.

Also Moon forced many many broadcasts onto him while dying :) not only partly the reason why he failed the project, it also further cemented his helplesness.. because he can’t do anything to help! A common phrase you hear from him is “I can’t even help myself”.

It’s a little treat in almost all scug campaigns iirc.

Also echoes are all so interesting I love them and their silly little opinions. Shout out to the one who told arti to stop being such an angry bitch <3

#im sorry for writing essays hehe hoho #actually ill out this into read more! #being ill do this with further long asks #waking up ranting abt rw lore oh what joys #waiting for my wrist to heal has never been more fine <3 #ask #pinkavtomation #also these rambles #although i try to take as much from the canon as possible #they uh- u dont have to feel pressured to take any as fact #the fun with media is to enjoy it however u want

[mskatesharma]

Simone's LA Times podcast left me so ambivalent...She was delightful per usual and I'm glad she has some TBA projects so I can support her work elsewhere. But I think I'm finally over the show....

TVWLM is the only Bridgerton book I like, so I was happy to peace out from the fandom after S2. But S2 left me so dissatisfied and Simone and JB have made it seem like they'll have a decent story in S3, so I was gonna stick around. But Simone's reveal that they had written a backstory and flashbacks for Kate—but ultimately scraped it—has just left such a sour taste (compounded by everything else) and IDK that I can't reconcile it anymore. Like do I still want to follow this show?

They've got no problem giving all the white women characters their due (Eloise, Daphne, Penelope, Violet), but Kate, her family, and Lady Danbury have been horrendously written. There's no reason to be optimistic they'll try to course correct next season. Obviously Simone & JB have some idea of what their storyline is (seems she's been permitted to hint about a baby), and it sounds promising when they sell it, but I doubt it'll actually be that substantive/thoughtful...They didn't care to do right by Kate & Kanthony their own season, and now they've got a new central romance plus a million subplots to contend with S3.

Just feeling very disillusioned about a show I once really enjoyed despite its many issues.

I LOVED the LA Times interview, the questions were really good, and they actually asked about stuff other than representation. I also feel like Simone felt comfortable, especially seeing as she offered to tattoo the interviewer lol. I’m so excited to hear about what she has coming up, and I hope there’s an announcement soon because news about Bridgerton is just depressing as shit.

Anon, I am so tired of the shit that we continue to find out after the release of season two. Like it’s no secret that I have my issues with how shit the writing was for season two, but this latest thing is just...yeah. Part of me wonders if the way Simone (and Jonny) continue to bring stuff up is their way of trying to get it included next season? Like trying to force the show’s hand? (Also, I did start answering this ask yesterday but got annoyingly angry and depressed while answering so I had to leave it lol, sorry)

I am so fucking annoyed. And you’re absolutely right, it does leave such a bad taste in the mouth.

And you know what I find quite insidious about the whole thing? Is that they had these flashbacks included in the sides that Simone auditioned with, giving the impression of a somewhat thorough exploration of Kate's background and cause of her trauma and grief, as well as making it seem that Kate's background (including being Indian) and life in India was going to be given consideration, only for them to scrap the scenes entirely once Simone was cast. I honestly find it somewhat disgusting, and to be honest, it makes me feel sick. It’s like they enticed her with those scenes, and the promise of that kind of thoughtful focus, only to get rid of them once she was cast. Those scenes were bait.

And look, I know just because these sides and scenes were used for audtion purposes, doesn’t mean they were always going to be included in the show, but that makes it even worse? I didn't necessarily want flashbacks of Kate's time in India because I didn't trust the show to handle such scenes sensitively enough, but the fact that these scenes were written in the first place and then scrapped, ENRAGES me. It makes me feel violent. They wrote and included this stuff because they knew it was important for Kate's character, to understand her as a character and her motivations, and I don’t understand why it wasn’t included. So we could watch Jack and Portia have the same conversation over and over again? So we could watch any of the other sideplots go nowhere for far too long? WHY DID THEY TREAT KATE’S GRIEF AND TRAUMA AS THOUGH IT WAS MEANINGLESS AND THAT IT DIDN’T MATTER???

The WOC on this show are so poorly served, and I fucking hate it. I think maybe they’re saving Lady Danbury’s backstory for the Queen Charlotte spinoff, but, that’s still shit because not everyone who watches Bridgerton is going to watch the spinoff. Plus, if they keep the main elements from RMB, then Lady Danbury is involved in Polin’s story as well? And it’s gross, because her sole purpose in life is not to be the Bridgertons’ romantic fairy godmother?? Like fuck off with this shit. It’s offensive. I really thought they would expand on Kate and Lady Danbury’s relationship, and have Lady Danbury confide in Kate about her life and why she gave Kate the advice she did after the non-wedding...but they didn’t. And then you have how they treated Kate in HER SEASON. It honestly felt like she was a side character in her own season at times and I just...FUCK.

Like, my expectations for season three regarding Kanthony were already rock bottom, and with everything new that comes out, my expectations just get lower. It’s depressing, and I just...it gets more and more obvious that this show doesn’t actually care about ‘diversity’; for them it doesn’t actually have to be substantive, it’s just icing that they can sprinkle on the top and then ask for the plaudits for their superficial diversity. And it pisses me off that their superficiality gets hardly any traction or criticism.

#ask #anon #bridgerton #kate sharma #kathony #kanthony #anthony x kate #kate x anthony #the viscount who loved me #i hate how annoyed this show makes me #lol do you ever just randomly remember that there are people in the fandom who think the lack of focus on kate’s grief and trauma #isn’t actually that much of a big deal and that it wasn’t important in the first place? 😂😂😂😂 #what a stupid stance to have jfc