#good end is blessed but also i will be thinking about 'curtain call' and 'lone king' til i die all 'round fantastic route! no notes!

[demi-pixellated]

oh matsuda they hate you for your organizational swag and fat tits

#Paradise blvn #MatsuAzu #Matsuda #Azuma #Fanart #MSPaint Draw #cw smoking #matsuda was made in a lab for me #Only. apparently #that's fine - all for me! i was born to understand your intricacies and nuances #good end is blessed but also i will be thinking about 'curtain call' and 'lone king' til i die all 'round fantastic route! no notes! #one note actually: i wish he had a sprite with a cigarette like hongou did bc i would be just that much more down bad for him

[infernal-fire]

suburban dream

summary: how do you wake up from a nightmare? is it a nightmare if you’ve been asleep the whole time?

major warnings: noncon/dubcon smut, stalking, mention of pregnancy, some cum play (check the prompts for indications of other warnings)

a/n: this is for @iraot​’s 1.1k writing challenge. BIG congrats on 1.1k (i cannot explain how glad i am that others get to read your amazing work) and another BIG thank you for hosting this challenge.

Here are the results of my wheel spins:

Kink wheel: daddy kink, somnophilia, breeding kink Character wheel: Jake Jensen Situation wheel: Neighbours AU

You let out a breath of relief as you dropped the last brown box into the corner of the room. How you managed to own this much stuff, you’d never know. Glanced around the living room, it was difficult to decide where to begin. After much contemplation, you huffed and picked up the pizza catalogue, deciding to call it a day. 

It was unbearable to leave the house in the mess that it was. On the other hand, your right hip wailed in agony every time you bent down. Lacking the much-needed support of friends or family, you had no option but to suck it up and unpack… but that can wait till tomorrow. 

Fishing out just the necessities for the night, you climbed up the stairs and headed into the master bedroom. Massive house for one person, you noted. You did insist that an apartment would suffice but Tony was a stickler for rules.

All Stark employees have to be residents of a Stark-Jensen neighbourhood. 

Before getting the job, you weren’t even aware that “Stark-Jensen” neighbourhoods were a thing; it was a term coined by the tech company itself, referring to neighbourhoods that are protected by Stark-Jensen technology. The crime rate in these neighbourhoods are always startlingly low, the odd criminal or two being from inside the community itself. All things considered, how could you say no to free housing? 

Sure, the security measures assured that you never had to worry, but it also made you wonder why they were there in the first place. This place was as secure as the Stark Tower; why? You tried not to ask too many questions, afraid of getting on Tony’s bad side. Besides, it isn’t characteristic of him to give you a straight answer anyway. 

Life is good, your most harrowing concern at the moment being that your new place had no curtains. It had been a long time since things were calm and you were just recognizing that your days had been free of storms for some time now. Counting your blessings for the second time that night, you stepped into the shower and reminded yourself of all the things to be grateful for. 

To say you were in a good mood was an understatement. You finished your night routine right as the pizza was delivered and excitedly skipped down. No one told you how fun living alone was but they didn’t need to - you quickly found that independence is a glorious necessity in everyone’s life.

Jake stood bewildered at your person throwing the door open. He gripped the pizza box tight to ensure he didn’t drop it and continued to look at you like you had grown a third head. He never was very good with his words, but your beauty truly inhibited his ability to think.

“Hi?” you asked.

“Hey, I-I’m your neighbour, Jake. Saw that you were moving in and I came to ask if you need any help.” 

“Oh,” you contemplated, looking past him. “Where’s the pizza person?”

“I paid for it. Housewarming gift?” he  said like a question and handed it over. 

You received the warm box and waited for him to say something as he fiddled with his hands. His smile looks so familiar but you couldn’t place your finger on it. 

“So…Do you need help?” He looked up right at the end. You grinned at how shy he was.

“I would really appreciate the help tomorrow,” you replied casually. 

“Oh, so… I’ll come by tomorrow morning?” He looked hopeful, as if you were the one handing him the olive branch. You took a once-over of his build, sure that he would come handy when your hip gives up again and nodded in response. 

He nodded back slowly and turned around to leave, but seeing him at your doorstep felt eerily similar to a puppy left out in the rain. 

“I don’t think I can finish this pizza alone,” you called out. He turned around, a glint of happiness apparent in the shine of his eyes. 

“Do you have time to help me with this right now?” It was your turn to look hopeful and you really hoped this cutie took the bait.

He did. 

You couldn’t ignore the nagging at the back of your head that you had seen him somewhere. You also couldn’t dismiss the fact that dinner together was just a little awkward. The conversation started off with small talk, and it didn’t take a genius to tell that neither of you enjoyed it. Luckily, it shifted to talks about the neighbourhood and your old job. After that, the words flowed easily, the two of you bonding like you had known each other forever. Although it was smooth sailing, you couldn’t help but wonder how he knows so much about the neighbourhood security measures. When he mentioned that he had lived there for about 6 years, you chalked it up to a simple accumulation of knowledge he must’ve acquired from being around for so long. 

“So everyone who lives around here works for Stark-Jensen, right?” you questioned, trailing your finger on the rim of your second wine glass for the night.

“Yeah, for the most part. Though it’s hard to tell who works for who.”

You chuckled in agreement.

“What is it with that? I mean, I work for Stark, and my colleagues, too… but exclusively for Stark. Jensen does exist right?”

“Yeah,” he snickered, “He does. Stark makes the tech and Jensen does the coding.”

“So they’re a two-man team, but Tony’s the face of the company? Seems sort of unfair,” you muttered, quirking your brow a little. 

Jake smiled at your comment, glanced at his hands and looked back up at you. 

“Maybe he wants it to be that way.” He nudged his glasses up and took a little sip of his wine while peering at you. 

You cocked your head to the side and considered the information. Your head was hazy and you needed to stop drinking; alcohol and cute guys are not a good mix. 

“Wait.” You squinted at him. 

“Does that mean you’re a Stark-Jensen employee?” 

He let out a chortle and took your glass from you. 

“Hey, hey I want that back!” you whined, not even caring that you’re embarrassing yourself. 

“I think that’s enough for today.” He gently helped you up, waiting for you to move. 

“I can usually handle my liquor,” you promised, clinging onto his broad form for support. 

He started moving you up to your lone mattress in the corner of your room, softly laying you down. 

“Jake,” you caught his arm. “You didn’t answer the question. Do you work for Stark-Jensen?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

You pouted at his answer, still gripping his wrist like you owned him. He tenderly pried your fingers off him and placed them on your belly. 

“See you tomorrow,” he mumbled as he left your room. You drifted asleep easily, blissfully unaware of how you’d never be able to live down the humiliation of your drunken stupor. 

The next day, you hoped Jake wouldn’t show up. It would save you from the burning heat that crept up your neck every time you recalled the night before.

Unfortunately, Jake had found it way too amusing an opportunity to tease you, showing up at your doorstep at 10 AM on the dot. 

The day went on without a hitch, the conversation picking up easily from where you left off. Jake found it endearing when you groaned at the mention of your state, only after three glasses of wine. The question of his employment never crossed your mind again, both of you having way too much fun unpacking. You felt ten times better knowing that your neighbour was a loveable, single, hunky nerd; it made the stress of settling in that much better. 

Of course, like all good things, the weekend came to an end. Monday morning, you eagerly prepped yourself for a new week at the office. Being Tony’s right hand took five rounds of interviews as well as background checks into every living relative you had. After the turbulent hiring process, you found that the job was not any easier. Luckily, the move had you feeling more thankful about being in sync with all the Stark tech; with FRIDAY managing your house and personal appointments, it was easier to keep track of Tony’s day. 

You stepped out of the house and shielded your eyes from the beautiful day. Just then, your lovely new friend stepped onto his porch wearing casual attire.

“Have fun at work!” he called after you.

“Thanks! Are you going to work?”

“Yes, I am.” You took in his outfit one more time, chuckling as you wondered what job would pay enough to live here while dressed in sweats.

“Well, in case I don’t see ya’... Good afternoon, good evening and good night!” you exclaim loudly. 

Jake giggled like a schoolboy and waved goodbye before ducking into his car. 

Tony’s 10 AM meeting has been pushed to 11 AM, Miss L/N. 

“No, no, that won’t do! He has another meeting at 12 PM, the timing will clash. FRIDAY, who was he supposed to meet at 10 AM?”

Speaking to the AI felt more like talking to yourself, but with time, you assured yourself that it would look as cool as Stark when handling your things.

He’s meeting Mr Jensen, the co-founder of Stark-Jensen. I believe you have not met him yet. 

“Yeah, I haven’t. Could you call him for me, FRIDAY?”

Sorry Miss L/N, Mr Jensen’s phone is switched off. He has already notified Tony of the change in plans. 

“What an asshole,” you grumbled. 

On the contrary, I think you would like Mr Jensen, Miss L/N.

“You can just call me Y/N, FRIDAY. Oh, and, send out a notification to all of today’s meeting hosts and tell them to push it by one hour. If they complain, send them my number to take up any problems they have.” 

It’ll be done by the time you reach your office. 

“Thank you,” you smiled and pulled into your parking spot, right beside Tony’s. 

It was hard to imagine what would’ve happened today if Tony didn’t give you access to FRIDAY. Calling each meeting host and personally asking them to push their meetings seemed like a tedious and mind-bending task. And frankly, you didn’t ever look forward to talking to Karen’s. But now, you would never have to know; FRIDAY was an absolute godsend. 

You stepped onto the other side of security clearance just as the clock struck 9 AM. Strutting up to your office, you made a mental checklist of everything you need to do during the day. Usually, Tony didn’t require you to sit in for his meetings. He has a different set of assistants for note-taking purposes. 

Too consumed by your thoughts, you didn’t notice the large picture of Jake and Tony sitting side by side on the wall beside the elevators. You also didn’t notice Jake’s smirk as he passed by you with ease. He would’ve stopped to say hi, but he knew that you didn’t realize who he was yet. Now he just had to figure out a way to get you to show up to his and Tony’s meeting and give you the heart attack of a lifetime. 

Beep, beep.

The Stark-watch buzzed on your wrist, letting you know that Tony was calling for you. You had barely even stepped into the elevator and he was already whining like a baby. 

You shook your head and stepped into the doorframe of his lab.

“Come here!” his voice called from the far end of a lab. Your suspicions of him being under the work table were confirmed when he wheeled out on his back and handed you a wrench. 

“Do me a favour. Tighten this for me?” 

He handed you the arm of an Iron Man suit, what you assumed was his latest mark. He already lived at the lab as it was, you wondered how he ever had time for Pepper. 

“Come on, put your arm into it L/N! You know what, you’re distracted, give it here.”

“Did you call me here to tighten your screws?” You shifted your weight onto one leg and crossed your arms. It was sassy of you, but Tony’s assistant needs to have some backbone, famously said by Rhodey.

“Well, you know me, screws always loose.” He knocked on his head and chuckled at his own joke. You sighed and turned to walk out. 

“I need you to sit in for my 11 o’clock. And cancel everything else today.”

You gasped and turned again, marching to where he was lying down. 

“Tony Stark, you have no regard for anyone’s time! I already pushed everything back by one hour because of your buddy Jensen and now you’re asking me to cancel everything?”

“I know, and I agree. I wish I could go to the mind-numbing meetings with corporate clowns, but I want to show you and Jensen something cool.”

He stopped fiddling with his toy just long enough to glance at you. 

You sighed and called for FRIDAY, groaning for the umpteenth time since that morning. Why were you acting like this was the first time he’s done this? It was probably your lack of energy from moving. You couldn’t wait to get home and maybe call Jake over for dinner. Now that you considered this possibility, time seemed to pass slower, but at least there was something worthwhile to look forward to. 

When 10:55 rolled around, you were sitting in Tony’s lab, patiently waiting as Tony set up his latest invention for demonstration. 

“Where’s your buddy?” you asked, checking your watch for the time again. 

“On his way,” he replied without turning away from his work. 

He paused and took a step back to admire his work before facing you. 

“You haven’t met Jake, have you?”

“Jake?”

Right on cue, Jake walked through the doors of the labs and you whipped around to find your grinning friend.

“Howdy neighbour,” Jake sneered. 

“Oh, right. You live beside each other,” Tony muttered as he gathered some more things from his desk. 

You shamelessly inhaled the pinewood and vanilla-infused scent of Jake as he sat down beside you. To have him so close to you was a dangerous thing, your cunt unknowingly clenching every time he moved his biceps. 

“Stop making heart-eyes at him.”

You threw whatever was in your hand at Tony’s head, and it happened to be a pen. It narrowly missed as he ducked and doubled over in laughter at your embarrassment. The bastard took sick pleasure in it so he often made it a point to humiliate you, but it usually wasn’t in front of the co-CEO of the world’s largest tech company. 

The rest of your time in that lab went on without any heart attacks - as far as anyone knew, the slick between your thighs doesn’t account for a ‘heart attack’, per se. You shouldn’t even be thinking about Jake like that. He was technically your boss too. 

Tony dismissed you at lunch and told you to take the rest of the day off, much to your delight. You slid into your car and dropped your head onto the steering wheel.

You had barely moved into the neighbourhood and you’re already finding ways to be fired.

~Time skip~

You sighed and laid back in the over-the-top maternity chair Jake got you for feeding. Your baby gurgled as curled his little fingers into his palm before knocking on your breast once. With a light chuckle, you cooed as the little bundle began falling asleep. 

This was the only place in the house that had a sliver of sunlight gracing the inside of the house. 

You could have outdoor privileges if you didn’t pull that little stunt. 

Could you really blame yourself for trying to leave? How were you to know that it’s impossible to leave a Stark-Jensen neighbourhood?

Because it says “Stark-Jensen” in the name, you dumbass. 

Fair enough.

You lost count of how many times you sigh on the daily, instead opting to count the number of times you’re able to hold off a mental breakdown. Today, you got the rare privilege of privacy, with Jake being gone to another one of Stark’s presentation.

You reminisced about the last time you sat in Tony’s lab and watched him explain his latest creation. Little did you know that the first time you sat with Jake in there would also be the last time you ever sat in there. 

You gently placed the Jim in the cradle. Again, one of the many over-the-top investments made by Jake to ensure the baby got state-of-the-art care. The way Jensen had made you sit beside him as he put the contraption together almost had you lurching. But you didn’t want to wake the baby. The horridness of the memories cannot outweigh your will to keep Jimmy from crying.

“Look at it!”, Jake excitedly spun the box to show you. It must’ve cost an unreasonable amount of money - not that he couldn’t spare to spend the coin, but the purchase confirmed your worst suspicions; he was serious about this all. 

Your eyes, puffy from the days of crying, were barely open. Yet you still nodded, figuring that if you put up with his enthusiasm now, he’ll let you go to sleep without raping you like he did every night. 

Anyway, you were wrong. 

When did everything go so wrong?; How?

You picked up your phone. Your eyes flickered between the only two contacts saved on it. Jake made sure you couldn’t do anything except call him or Tony.

You missed your ex-boss (who was always more of a friend to you). But, it was obvious that calling him wasn’t worth it and would rarely yield any fruitful conversation. Tony always spoke as if he were walking on glass around you and your words were always monitored and censored by Jake. It didn’t take long to figure that one out. 

“I don’t know what happened, Tony, she’s just unhinged,” Jake explained over the phone. In the background, you struggled against the bonds that held you to his bedframe. You sobbed harder into your gag and tried to scream ‘help’. All that came out was a shriek. 

“You hear her? She’s completely unfit to come into work… What happened? I don’t know man… She’s breaking down under all the stress. A few days of rest might do the trick. No, no, you don’t have to come down. I’ll take care of it.” 

He ended the call and you went limp, pausing your hysteria. He smiled at you as if he hadn’t kidnapped you. As if he hadn’t just made Tony believe that you were off your rockers. As if he hadn’t just fucked you five times over the span of 48 hours. 

He had planned every step of your entrapment to the letter and it was all going according to his plan.

You put your phone facedown on the dining table and walked back upstairs to your room. His room. Your room, too. 

Never, you internally screamed.

Well, it’s too late to debate it. 

You stood at the foot of your bed and traced the footboard. He took you countless amount of times on this bed and every instance held some clue that he was working up to what was happening now. You could see that now - but what was the point now?

You giggled as Jake pushed you onto his bed. Who knew this golden retriever could be so rough?

“Shhshshshhh” you slurred and Jake laughed in response. 

“Tony’s not here, baby,” he replied, climbing on top of you. 

“We’re not gonna get fired?” 

“He can’t fire me, sweetheart.”

“Oh… yeah.” You frowned, remembering that your risqué relationship was only risky for you. 

In your drunken haze, you didn’t realize Jake was rubbing his bulbous tip against your folds, gathering slick. 

“Condom?” 

“Don’t have,” Jake lied. 

“Oh,” you hesitated. 

“It’ll feel so good, baby.” He nuzzled his nose into the crook of your neck and sunk in before you had the chance to protest. 

“Jakeeee,” you whined. Writhing under his grasp, you shook your head side-to-side as he vigorously fucked into you. 

He abruptly stopped and pulled out. “What have I said about saying my name?”

“I’m sorry, daddy,” you sheepishly say. 

“That’s right, slut. You’re gonna make me a daddy, right?” He pushed back in. 

“Yeah, you are. Gonna make me a daddy, so call me daddy.”

The implication of his words flew right over your head in your drunken haze and blank mind. Any ounce of sense that you had left was being fucked out by his thick length. 

“Gonna blow my load. Fill you tight cunt, not gonna last long.”

His words were broken with loud moans. He couldn’t think straight with your warm, wet pussy inviting him in over and over. 

As you shook from an overwhelming orgasm, your pussy involuntarily clenched, causing Jake to lose any last bit of restraint he was holding onto. He pushed in as far as he could go as you flailed around. He pinned your arms down and pressed his mouth into yours, delivering a hot and heavy kiss that had you panting. 

He pulled out, but the string of cum that followed made you blanch. You never were one for cum play. Still, you didn’t protest when Jake pushed everything back in with two fingers. 

“Gotta’ make sure you’re full baby.”

You shake your head now, but again, what’s the point? It’s all done and dusted. Though, you should give yourself some credit. Even if you had realized earlier, it wouldn’t have made a difference. He would’ve realized that you knew before you could’ve even thought about escaping.

As you drifted asleep, you adjusted the volume of the baby monitor one last time and slumped into the fluffy pillows. 

How do you wake up from dreams? Was it by pinching yourself? You couldn’t wake up from the nightmare that was your reality when you pinched yourself. You doubted that would work right now. You couldn’t recall how to open your eyes. Instead, you whimpered in your sleep, reliving the moment Jake finally revealed his ulterior motive

“You did what?” Jake was seething, but the only indication of it was his clenching jaw and red face. His tone was the perfect embodiment of the calm before a storm. 

“I know you aren’t happy… but Jake, you- you’re always talking about babies and a family. It was so overwhelming and I… I-I…” You were shivering now, unable to withstand the heat of his glare. You had never been on the receiving end of his anger. Hell, you had never even seen him angry. 

“I didn’t have an abortion, Jake, for god’s sake stop looking at me like a killed a baby! Plan B is not a crime. I’m only even bringing this up because I started on birth control anyway. Plan B every time we have sex is just not practical or feasible.”

At this point, you could’ve been speaking to a wall. Jake still hadn’t said anything and you were beginning to wonder if he had even been listening. 

“I can’t believe I didn’t notice,” he whispered, at last. 

“What?”

“I watch you do everything, I can’t believe I didn’t know about the Plan B.”

“What… What are you saying?”

“I said,” Jake stood up, “I’ve basically been watching you 24/7. And I don’t know how I didn’t notice this.” 

“What do you mean watching me?” Tears in your waterline were threatening to blur your vision but you blinked furiously in an attempt to keep looking Jake in the eyes.

 “You think FRIDAY works for you?” 

Jake leisurely cracked each knuckle and took a step towards you. You took one back. 

“Oh, now, don’t be like that.”

You woke from your nightmare that was the boiling pot and jumped straight into the fire. Jake was already moving in and out of your channel, moaning about how he missed you too much. 

You tried to adjust yourself but he caught your arms and pulled out just long enough to flip you onto your stomach. 

When he pushed back in, the hopelessness of your life manifested as tears; it happens every once in a while. 

Today, you had a new record: you were able to hold off a total of 7 breakdowns.

But, of course, that was right before he pinched you awake every time.

Masterlist

#jake jensen #the losers #chris evans #chris evans fic #chris evans characters #Chris Evans character #jake jensen fic #dark!jake jensen #dark!jake jensen x you #dark!jake jensen x reader #dark!jake #poc reader #black!reader #chubby!reader #plus size!reader #fic #mcu #marvel #the losers fic #iraotwheelsofdebaucherychallenge #1.1k challenge

[thatsbucknasty]

she used to be mine (xi) waitress au

summary: Inspired by the broadway musical. Y/N Beck is a pie baking force to be reckoned with. She’s pregnant with her lazy ass husband, Quentin Beck’s baby. As everything around her turns upside down, Doctor James Buchanan Barnes charms his way into her life.

pairing: Y/N x Bucky

tags are closed

author’s note: Alrighty guys, we’ve almost reached the end of this story. I hope you’re still reading, please tell me if you are!

chapter 11: she used to be mine

I wake up startled by a searing throb down the side of my belly. I quickly remove the sheets and there’s no blood so I try to lift myself up from the bed and start walking to the kitchen to get my decaf ready. I remember Bucky talking about the Braxton-Hicks contractions in one of our appointments a couple weeks ago and he told me I should walk so I walk. I have one of Wanda’s pregnancy books that she keeps sending me and walk, walk, walk for what feels like hours, although it’s only been 15 minutes.

I see myself in the mirror and I can’t recognize myself. My body’s changed so much, I’m pretty sure I have a few more wrinkles around my eyes and a few more freckles from all the damn walking under the sun. But that’s not what bothers me the most about all these changes. I just don’t feel like the person I used to be. She was good, a bit messy but always kind, she had a lot more hope in life for herself and those around her. I don’t know if it’s the pregnancy, or the divorce, or everything combined that’s made this version of me so bitter. And this isn’t something I can fix with a little more butter and sugar, in fact I don’t think it can be fixed.

-

It’s been the longest week of my entire life. Old Nick and Sam collectively decided to gang up on me, and I feel Bucky had to do with it a little bit too. They forced me to go on a “stay-at-home-vacation” until the baby is born, which should be any day now, so I’m just here, alone on a Saturday morning, while everybody is working, Quentin is sleeping with that woman and hasn’t even bothered to call me or show any interest in either his unborn child or our imminent divorce.

This is boring, I feel useless and I need to get out of here. This house, this awful, lopsided couch, that crooked picture frame of me and Quentin at prom so many years ago. I want to throw all of it away and start fresh in a nice, picket white fence house, just me and my baby. Wanda and Nat would come visit and I would bake some of my “La vie on rose petals and vanilla ice cream pie”, we would have a no boys allowed day when it’s just us, and sitcoms, and I could have wine or coffee again, little peanut could have a puppy or a kitty to play with and I would give her all my love and we could be a real, whole family. If I wasn’t tied to this place, these curtains that never let any light on, that man who was always so violent and disgusting but only just showed his true self, maybe I could have that pastel colored life that I should deserve. But what if this is what I deserve?

-

I called Quentin six times this week. Matt finally was able to send me the divorce papers that I already signed, but that lying, cheating, bastard hasn’t sent them back to me and won’t even dare to answer my calls or texts. I cleaned every surface of this dingy house and put every item that reminded me of my screwed up marriage in a box outside for the garbage collector to take away. Quentin can buy new shirts and underpants, if he can’t answer the stupid phone I can throw away his stuff. I don’t even care anymore.

I find myself walking again but not around my kitchen. I’m waking to the diner cause I felt trapped in the house and I need to cook, something with lots of garlic or onions, I will call it “Wrecked home scrambled eggs pie” served with sauteed bell peppers on the side and a spicy sauce dripped on top of the crust. 

-

I go through the back door and into the kitchen before the girls see me, Sam reacts by giving me a side eye and continuing flipping the burgers he’s working on right now.

“Table 9 order’s ready!” Sam calls out and Wanda takes it.

“We have a pregnant lady in the back, stress baking”.

“I can hear you!”

“Alright good, well you shouldn’t be here. You’re lucky it’s a busy day so we can’t just drop everything and drive your ass back home where you should be!” Nat’s in the kitchen window scolding me now too, perfect. I knew this was coming and to be honest I prefer their banter than the deafening silence I felt at home.

“Just so you know, I’m texting Bucky and he’s coming over” Sam interjects.

“Wha- guys, I’m just baking one pie and then I’ll go, tell him he doesn’t have to come”.

“Why couldn’t you bake this one pie at home then?” Wanda asks with genuine curiosity in her voice.

I decide to be truthful.

“I felt trapped and lonely, I missed the diner. Plus I didn’t have any bell peppers at home and I was craving them”.

They all look at me weirdly, there’s no pity in their eyes, there’s just… tenderness.

-

Bucky arrives an hour after I got here, with a stern face and his lab coat still clinging to his frame.

“Hey, what’s up, sweetheart? You’re supposed to be resting”. He rubs my shoulders and all I can think is how grateful I am for this little family and this man life blessed me with.

I explain how awfully sad and stressed I was feeling at home and he takes a seat between me and Steve, who’s eating a slice of pie while Wanda’s showing him what she calls “satisfying cleaning Tik Toks”, and Sam’s chatting with Nat about a concert he’d like to take her to next week. Everything about this feels so calm and I’m even starting to feel sleepy with Bucky’s skilled hands rubbing my knotted neck and shoulders.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s decided to finally stop being a fucking hypocrite! It’s Y/N and the stupid fucking Doctor. Tell me, Doc, did you enjoy gazing at her lady parts when she’d go for a “check up” and fell in love because you too are lame and boring?”

I grab Bucky’s hand and stand between him and Quentin, using my other hand to protect my belly.

“What the hell are you doing here, Quentin? You’re not welcome here anymore”. I say, head up high but voice trembling.

“Came home to drop your divorce papers- that I’m not signing by the way- and to tell you to fuck off because whether you like it or not, I’m gonna be a father and you can’t do anything about it baby girl. It’s you and me! It’s always gonna be you and me, so tell you precious Doctor and your friends goodbye. We’re coming home!”

Quentin grabs my hand and tries to yank me away from Bucky but before I can do anything else Steve and Sam are already punching the shit out of Quentin, sitting him down on the floor and pushing his arms around his back. Bucky is taking me away from the fight, shielding my eyes from the view, he knows I don’t need this kind of stress. Nat called the cops when Quentin arrived, knowing the asshole would pull out a stunt like this. Minutes pass and I can’t step away from Bucky’s embrace to see his ass handcuffed and thrown into the police’s back seat.

Bucky takes a step back to look at my face as he feels me trembling and his shirt soaked with my tears.

“Y/N, sweetheart, it’s over. He’s gone”.

I try to form words but then it hits me.

The pain.

This is not what I asked for.

The excruciating cramp-like aches in my lower stomach.

If I’m honest, I’d give this life back for a chance to start over.

The water running down my legs.

I would rewrite the story, from beginning to end.

I can’t feel my legs. All I feel is fear, pain and anger.

This is the life that I’m bringing you into, little girl. I’m so sorry. To you, but also to the little girl I once was. Because she also deserved a good life and she’s gone, but she used to be mine.

chapter 12: contraction ballet

#waitress musical #waitress au #bucky x reader #doctor!Bucky #waitress!reader #Marvel AU #avengers au #Bucky Barnes #natasha romanoff #wanda maximoff #sam wilson #Steve Rogers #quentin beck

[princessmariaphiliper]

THE SLEEPOVER FIC | Part 5 The Contemplating

Notes: James Acaster, Original characters, No warnings this week just some good innocent fluff. I lied. I mention babestation twice, one day I will write something innocent. 

Pairing: James Acaster x Reader 

Genre: Fluff with eventual smut, Slow Burn fic

Words: 2,439

Summary: You and James have put yourselves into trouble, but you think maybe it’s hotter that way. 

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 /  Part 9

The following Sunday morning you awoke to sunrise draping lazily through your cream curtains. Pulling the duvet back you dragged yourself out of bed with a soft stretch. Making your way to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You looked out your window at the dusty London street. 

It was going to be a pleasant day today. Temperature making its way up to the mid-twenties. So late last night you had decided you would have a day outdoors. You had some writing to do for a project you were planning therefore you’d figured today was as good as any to start. Brushing your teeth idly you started your, now rather frequent, internal dialogue on James. 

Your mind had been running circles since Wednesday evening and the kiss he’d given you on his way out. Part of you kept telling yourself that ‘maybe this was just a way he said goodbye to people’. After all, the two of you hadn’t had a sober goodbye up until that point. Perhaps it was just his formalities. And it wasn’t as if he’d called or even dropped you a text since then to indicate a romantic gesture. But the other half of you could help read between the lines of his subtle touches you could still feel on your skin.

Washing your face and leaving the room you moved to your wardrobe. Pulling out an oversized white tee and dark wash jeans. You began to get dressed. Considering where you might like to go today. After some deliberation you decided on the coffee house beside Camden lock. You sat down at your desk, putting on some concealer, liner and brushing up your eyebrows. You looked into your y/e/c eyes, edging the spoolie in between your fingers and resting your chin in both hands. Letting out a large sigh, the confusion continued.

You’d always considered yourself to know right from wrong. However, your thoughts of James had lately been trivial to that. Although you knew that James wasn’t happy in his relationship, that didn’t mean that his partner wasn’t. This was yet another hurdle of guilt that was blocking you from admitting growing feelings for James. But as much as you blocked it from your mind, you couldn’t block out the way James made you feel. A sense of calm, giddiness and as though you had known him all your life. Yet it had only just been one week since you first met. 

Dropping your hand and sighing you shook the thoughts from your head. Brushing your hair quickly, grabbing your laptop bag and heading out for the day. 

The air was warm, the sun shining down onto the streets as you stepped out from your apartment complex. You inhaled, sucking in the early summer air. It was busy on the streets, as it usually was on a Sunday in London. Many people basking in the final day on their trips before getting the train home. You would always recognise how lucky you were to have the chance to live in such a vibrant city, doing the work that you loved. Trotting with a skip in your step to your local tube station. A smile across your face from your blessing. 

The tube, as always, was muggy and dirty. Passing a burst of carbonated air through every once in a while. But eventually you made it to Camden station and were able to bask in the sunlight once again. You made your way up Camden market, the bright colours above the stylistic storefronts. People weaving past as you pushed through the crowd, heading straight up towards the lock. 

After some time of fighting past bodies you reached the lock, the filthy black bars and open arms of the coffee shop embracing you on arrival. You ordered your usual drink, nestling down onto a free table in the outside seating area. Under a parasol in the corner.

There were lots of people sitting and chatting around you, enjoying the sunshine with each other's company. You people watched for a while, taking pleasure in voyeurism was one of your favourite things to do in the city. It was filled with an array of characters, outside the restraints of the cafe’s fencing. The lining of the lock was littered with people, sitting, eating and drinking casually. There was a young couple beside you, seemingly on a first date, their conversation awkward and laced with anxiety. Reminding you subconsciously of how alone you were. Not only in this moment, but somewhat in day to day life.

Mostly working during the day, you hardly indulged in the thought of spending your time going on dates, let alone falling in love with someone. After your previous relationship you needed time for yourself. To learn, grow and understand who you were as a person. And yet here you were, years down the line having done all these things. Working alone in a coffee shop, surrounded by people in love. You pondered the idea for a moment, staring at the half drafted document on the screen of your laptop before beginning to type.

Comically however, just as you did so, your phone started to buzz from the pocket of your jeans. You reached inside, studying the caller ID before you answered. It was Olive, you pressed it to your ear. 

“Olive” 

“Hi lovely, I just wondered what you’re up to today?”

“Not much, I’m just starting the Eraser project I told you about the other day. I was going to send you the proposal a little later to see if you're on the same page with my thinking”

“Oh, brilliant, I was actually going to ask if you wanted to meet up over coffee to talk about it. I could come by yours in about an hour if that's okay?”

“I’m actually not in at the moment, I’m in Camden, I can meet you somewhere if you like though?” 

“Camden sounds lovely on a day like today. I’ll come down and meet you there!” 

“Alright perfect, I’ll text you the cafe I’m at when you set off?” 

“That's great thank you, I’ll see you soon.” The phone cut out, leaving only the hubbub of people as your background noise. With a smile you began to type once again, grateful for someone to  subside your lonely feeling. 

Olivia arrived about forty five minutes after your initial call, the second call being moments ago when she couldn’t find you in the seating area. She was wearing a jade kimono that had an intricate peacock pattern on top of a black cotton jumpsuit. Paired with embellished sandals as well as multiple chunky bracelets. She gave you a warm smile as you waved at her above the sea of people. 

“Y/n!” she said, making her way over and sitting across from you. A cup of jasmine tea in her hand. 

“Hello lady Olivia,”

“How have you been?” 

“On off, how about you?”

“About the same, grateful for the sunshine!” She exclaimed, raising her hands passionately in the air. 

“So.”

“So” You grinned at one another, excited to be discussing a new creative project. “What are your thoughts”

“I think first of all it should be filled with colour. Hopefully, if all goes well, we’ll be able to set up an open air theatre by the end of summer, just before the kids go back to school. I want flowers and paint and colourful lighting.”

“That sounds amazing, what do you want me to do on the other side of things”

“Well I’d like for you to take a bit more of a writing hat this time around. I think you’re ready for it. I’d like to see what you can create and bounce off of one another that way. I think it’d also be lovely to get a balance between different age perspectives with what were wanting to talk about”

“I’m up for that one hundred percent, I’ll be the old crone you need whenever you need it love” You laughed at her choice of words, not having intended your statement in that way but nonetheless you appreciated her humour. “How long until you’re wanting to book a space for making?” 

“I can get us one by next week if you want?” 

“Yeah that's fine by me.” 

The initial project proposal you’d brought forward was to explore gender and sexuality through growth. With memoirs, dance and music that was reminiscent of your own identity. You’d been brewing on the project for some time now. Unsure of how to put it into the world with its fullest potential. Then, you’d been working with Olivia and watching her grow at a later stage in life, you’d brought back out the project with a new filter. Wanting to go on a journey of creating ‘Eraiser’ along with her. The creative juices were flowing. You were on your third drink of the day, now accompanied with a muffin as your stomach had begun to rumble. You’d been brainstorming stories and concept ideas, bouncing off one another for a while when your phone began pinging on the table. It was a text from James causing you to do a secret giddy dance. The message that came through that read,

Are you in Camden? 

I am, why? 

Initially confused by how he knew your location before an image of you and Olivia from a distance came through. You smiled at the sound of his voice calling out your name above the early afternoon sun. 

“Y/n!”

“James!” You responded, him making his way towards your table. You stood from your chair as he came closer, embracing him in a hug. James was dressed in a pair of yellow canvas shorts and a white tee to match your own. He enclosed his arms around you. Being slightly taller he was able to naturally rest his chin atop of your head. 

“How’ve you been?” He murmured, placing a stealthy half kiss in your hair, before you released one another from the embrace. 

“I’m alright how are you?” 

“Okay thanks, you smell nice by the way” An offhand comment that made your hands curl around your middle finger. 

“This is Olivia, my co-worker. Olive, James”

“Lovely to meet you” James held out a hand to shake Olivia’s. Once again causing you to question his ambition by how he interacted with her in contrast to you. From the handshake to the lack of speaking her name in a sentence as he did with you. You regained your seat as the two chatted.

“You too James. Might you be James from the telly?” 

“Depends what channels you’re into.”

“Babestation?”

“Thats me”

“Have a seat,” She offered as the three of you chuckled, pointing to an empty table behind him. Accepting the invite to the table graciously James grabbed a chair and sat down beside you. 

“What are you doing here?” 

“Just having a meeting, enjoying the sunshine.” You squinted up towards the sky. 

“Oh sorry, I’m not interrupting am I?”

“No no,” Olivia spoke with a slightly devilish grin, “We were about finished I think.” 

This was a lie, you had been in the middle of explaining something to her when James had texted you. Knowing the implication behind her smile you rolled her eyes. It was going to be a long story to tell her once James had left. She continued, 

“So where did the two of you meet?” 

“We have a mutual friend, we met last friday for some drinks.” James nodded in agreement, mumbling a, some under his breath with a shake of his head. “What’re you doing here?” 

“Oh you know, getting out of the flat while it's nice out. I’ve been working all week so haven't had a chance to see many people that I don't have to be funny for” 

You felt slightly guilty but somewhat better about the fact that James hadn’t called since Wednesday. Selfishly forgetting he was a busy man, attempting to balance working to please people with a crumbling relationship. Not wanting him to feel lonely or burnt out. “Grab a drink if you like, I don’t mind not laughing at your jokes.” You responded sarcastically, however your intention was somewhat laced with care. James flashed you a kind smile, eyebrows raised in excitement. He placed his hands on the table, squaring his elbows in a half stand. 

“Only if you’re sure, I don't want to impose!” 

“No please join us, Y/n is not as interesting company as a real life pornstar” Olivia joked, causing a ripple of smiles and a light ‘fuck off’ to roll from your tounge. James stood from his seat with a ‘I won't be long’. The two of you watched him disappear into the cafe before Olivia turned to you with a knowing look on her face. You sighed, taking a sip of your drink. 

“So, is he good in bed?” 

“We haven’t had sex,”

“You should, he’s dishy” 

“It's not like that,” You trailed off “He has a girlfriend.”

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah… but it's complicated apparently”

“How so?” 

You explained as briefly as you could the events of the past week or so. Trying to watch out for how close James was getting towards the front of the line inside. After your word vomit Olivia’s grin was back. 

“So you like him then?” 

“I-” You contemplated, not having audibly admitted your thoughts for him yet. And the idea that you would have to face him in a couple minutes after doing so made you nervous. “It’s confusing.” you settled with. 

“It doesn’t have to be Y/n” 

Silently agreeing, you observed James as he ordered his drink now. Standing gently with one hand in his pocket, the other placed on the counter, his pelvis angled towards the window you were looking in from. Olivia continued, 

“Listen to me. I’m twice your age love, and I know it might sound complicated and terrifying now but you’ll regret the things you didn’t try for when you’re my age. He seems lovely and it's clearly something that you want. You’ve been around him for less than ten minutes and your face has been lit up since he arrived. Even if its short lived its worth a shot, plus, it looks like he's into you”

“You don’t know that” 

“Please, the way he had his hands around you earlier. I was practically gushing” 

James had started making his way back to the two of you now holding an iced tea in his palm. He flashed you a smile as he came through the door. 

“Just think about it.” Olive started again with a wink, “Because if you don’t, I might”

Thank you to all the lovelies who have been following the fic so far. I’ve been posting now every other day just to try get better quality of writing so hopefully yall are coping with that. Let me know any thoughts you have about the fic. I’m also taking James x Reader oneshot requests via DM’s so if you have anything you need desperately to be manifested I’m your gal. 

- Princess Maria :)))))

Taglist @josies-polestar @queensantiagoofthe99 

If you want to be put on, or taken off my taglist, feel free to tell me!

#james acaster x reader #james acaster imagines #james acaster fanfic

[dal3ks]

coming home

pairing: peter parker x female reader 

word count: 2.7k

warnings: sexual remarks, smut, cursing, allusions to sex, marking 

a/n: this was a fic i had posted on my main account @a-dorin​, but i am in the process of switching over content so that it is a strictly star wars account! just a disclaimer, i am not plagiarizing or stealing content, as this is my fic! 

“so when does your flight leave columbus?” peter asked, his voice thick with sleep. 

“tomorrow at nine a.m.,” you answered, “i can’t wait to see you.”

he beamed, “me either, love. it’s been a long three months without you.”

currently, you were sitting in your dorm room at ohio state university. you were on a facetime call with your boyfriend, peter parker. it was approaching midnight, 11:38 p.m., to be exact.

 the next morning, you would be boarding a plane home. you were beyond excited to see everyone during thanksgiving break, as you hadn’t seen your parents in a few weeks. parent’s weekend was the last week of october, so it had been a while. 

your heart ached at the thought of being curled up in bed with your dogs. your heart also ached at the thought of being curled up with your sweet, loving, boy.

peter had opted for a small private college in town for engineering and psychics. since he was a part of the avengers, they provided most of the funds for his tuition. it also helped that stark industries was on his résumé. meanwhile, you were about five hundred and thirty-three miles away in columbus.

yet, ohio state was your dream school. you wanted to go there since you could remember. it also helped that your father was an alumni. the university granted you a scholarship for that, and your ACT and SAT scores helped as well. you felt extremely blessed to be at your dream school, and you always remembered to remain humble.

“well babe,” peter began, “i need to start my term paper for my english class. anything on your mind before i go?”

“i just can’t wait to fuck you,” the words tumbled out of your mouth, and you mentally slapped yourself for saying anything.

peter raised a brow, “oh really? well, i can say the same for you princess.”

hearing your favorite nickname made your heart skip a beat, “i’m sorry i said that.”

“don’t be sorry,” peter smirked, “i loved hearing that. just you wait, princess. i’ll take care of you, just like i always do.”

“i want you now,” you whined.

“wait twenty-four hours and you’ll have me,” peter cooed, “i promise, princess. i have to go work on this paper, okay? i love you. text me.”

you pouted, jutting out your lip. peter sighed, “i can’t get distracted. it’s a ten page research paper. it’s really important babe.”

“okayyyy,” you huffed, picking a string on your comforter, “i love you too. see you tomorrow, handsome.”

“see you tomorrow, beautiful,” peter grinned, and the facetime call ended.

you plugged in your phone, letting it charge. you used to have a roommate, until she had to transfer in the middle of the semester. now, there was more empty space in the room. it was truly inevitable not to feel so lonely. especially when you were so fucking far away from everyone.

you hopped out of bed, opening the curtains. from your hall, you could see some of the glittering lights of the city. you could feel your heart aching, longing for the familiarity of your home. queens was your home. columbus was your second home. no where could ever compare to the place you grew up.

only a few more hours, though, and you would be home.

******

“is this seat open still?” a voice interrupted your thoughts.

startled, you glanced up to see a young man standing in the aisle of the airplane. even though you had the middle seat, the plane wasn’t entirely full. you decided to scoot closer to the window so you could see the sky.

you nodded, and the young man slid in beside you, “sorry, my seat was supposed to be the window seat, but i think you’re sitting in it. i don’t want to make you move. besides, looking out scares me a little bit.”

“i’m so sorry,” you apologized, “i didn’t know. you can have it back if you want.”

“oh no,” the man chuckled, “it’s not a big deal. don’t even worry about it.”

“where you flying to?” you inquired, as the man settled in his seat, “i’m (y/n), by the way.”

“i’m trying to get to manhattan,” the guy shrugged, “i’m aiden.”

“oh that’s cool!” you nodded, “i’m from queens.”

“gotcha,” aiden smiled, “actually, i’m coming from ohio state. i’m guessing you attend there as well?”

“yes,” you gushed, “i’m a kinesiology major, how about you?”

“i was a political science,” aiden replied, pulling out his phone, “but i switched to business. international marketing, specifically. i’m a junior though. i assume that you’re a freshman?”

“yep,” you answered, “navigating everything myself.”

“you’re not doing too bad,” he chuckled, “our background has probably helped a lot. do you have a snapchat or anything like that? don’t worry, i’m not hitting on you or anything. if you have a boyfriend back home, or at ohio state, i completely respect that. i just don’t want someone struggling alone. i’m not saying you are struggling, but i know the ins and outs of the school. if you ever need anything, feel free to ask.”

“oh yeah, i do,” you pulled your phone out of your pocket, “i’ll just add it to my notes and add you later. you’re extremely kind.”

“it’s not a problem,” aiden smiled, and that’s when you truly got a good look at him.

he was more than likely a college athlete. probably at ohio state for something like rugby, lacrosse, or rowing. he was fit, with a darker complexion. freckles dotted the bridge of his nose, and his dark brown curls were full. his jawline was clean, his handsome face completed with hazel eyes. god, if you weren’t single, you probably would have tried to make a move on the guy. he was gorgeous.

however, your anticipation to see the love of you life was eating away at you. your knee bounced up and down as you talked to aiden the rest of the flight. it was nice to have someone to talk to, as the it made the time fly by.

in no time, the plane was landing. aiden followed you as you boarded off, and towards the gate. security and bag checks felt like forever, but you finally made it through. you said your goodbyes to aiden, hoping that you two would reconnect once again. almost immediately, you were entering the train that was going to take you to your next stop. then, you would only be walking a couple blocks home. peter informed you that as soon as you were home, he was gonna come over.

you were excited, but a little anxious. insecurities started to creep into your thoughts. what if you had gained a noticeable amount of weight since the last time you saw him? what if you looked different? what if you weren’t good enough? even the thought of being naked in front of peter frightened you. however, you figured it was a little normal to be a little anxious. after all, it had been about three months since the last time you saw him.

suddenly, you were home. in front of you was your house, the crisp blue sky making the white paint appear clean and bright. the late november air was brittle, and the sun was on its way to dip over the horizon soon. skyscrapers in the skyline began to glisten as the sky got darker and darker. the traffic, people, and animals all became white noise as you walked up the sidewalk.

happiness flooded over you, especially as soon as you heard your dogs barking. you turned the knob, opening the door. your parents welcomed you with warm hugs, your dogs jumping everywhere with excitement.

after talking with your parents for a while, you trudged upstairs to your room. as soon as you opened the door of your room, you let out a sigh of happiness. so this is what pure happiness felt like. the feeling of bliss was immense.

you heard some commotion from your dogs downstairs, which you figured was a passerby or an animal. it happened often in your neighborhood. you could hear someone walking up the steps, and you inferred it was one of your parents.

it was not your mom or your dad. it was peter. immediately he scooped you into his embrace, and you felt yourself crumple into his arms. tears rolled down your cheeks as he squeezed you slightly, kissing the top of your head.

“i had no idea you were on your way,” you sniffled.

“once you stopped responding to my snaps for a bit i was worried,” peter murmured, “but i figured you were here. so i just decided to head this way.”

“i love you,” your eyes met his, “i love you so much.”

“i love you too,” peter grinned, “i love you more than you know, princess.”

******

“so what were you saying yesterday?” peter turned to you.

you raised a brow, confused, “what are you talking about?”

currently, you two were in your bed cuddling. it was the day before thanksgiving, so your parents were out buying groceries for the big dinner. so that left you and peter alone. the room was dimly lit by the christmas lights strung on the ceiling, and your favorite playlist was on low volume. peter’s shirt was off, and so were your pants. it just made things more comfortable.

“you talked about wanting to fuck me,” he answered, gently kissing your neck. he ran his fingers through your hair, “or was i mistaken?”

“i think you have a hearing deficiency,” you snorted, rolling over.

“heyyy,” peter whined, “how about i give you a back rub?”

the idea was tempting. it had been a long time since you had received a backrub from peter. sighing, you slipped off your hoodie, leaving you in just your bra and underwear. you laid on your stomach, and peter straddled your back.

his hands worked in gentle, soothing patterns on your skin. they stayed on your shoulders and back for a while, but started to drift downwards towards the small of your back, along with your butt. as he continued, you could almost feel the sexual tension in the air of the room. it was almost electric between the two of you as his hands roamed your body.

“hey princess,” peter’s voice was low, “can i take off your thong?”

you felt yourself stiffen, “no.”

“is something wrong?” his tone shifted from lust to fear. peter shifted his body so that he was now laying beside you again, “baby, what’s wrong?”

“i feel ugly,” you muttered, “it’s been a while, and i don’t know, i guess i feel insecure.”

“hey,” peter’s hand cupped your face, “you’re still beautiful (y/n) i fell in love with. i don’t care if anything has changed. if there are more stretch marks, i’ll kiss them all. whatever you’re worried about, let me handle, okay? you’re beautiful, (y/n). you’re so gorgeous. three months has no change to your beauty.”

“i love you,” your bottom lip trembled, and your eyes were brimmed with tears.

“i love you more,” peter’s lips met yours gently. he pulled back for a second, brushing a strand of hair away from your face.

peter looked as handsome as ever. it was clear he just shaved, as his face was clean. his floppy brown hair was somewhat contained, and his brown eyes shown, as there was nothing but love for you in his eyes. his lips were full, and he a looked wiser than he did since the last time you saw him. you figured stress, college, and being a hero all were factors. his muscles were apparent, rippling whenever he moved. god, you were so lucky to have this man.

you pressed your lips to peter’s, this time a little more forceful. he was taken a back by your actions, but regained control. he licked your bottom lip, and his tongue entered your mouth. he shifted you so that you were now underneath him. his callused hands trailed down the sides of your body, going up and down in slow motions. you could tell he was being careful, as you both wanted to enjoy this moment between the two of you.

“fuck,” peter mumbled.

“what?” your lips were still against his.

“i’ve been waiting for this for a long time,” he admitted, “i can’t wait to make you cum.”

“then do it,” your words almost pushed him over the edge.

he tilted your head up, kissing directly under your jawline. you moaned softly, urging him to continue. he placed sloppy kisses down your neck, nipping at your skin. he had barely even started with you and you could feel how wet you were.

“can i take this off?” peter’s breath was hot against your skin.

“yes,” you answered, arching your back so his hands could unclasp your bra. he casted it to floor.

he placed kisses all over your stomach, stopping at the waistband of your thong.

“is it okay if i take this off too?” his tone was full of lust, you could tell he was beyond turned on.

peter’s cheeks were a slight tinge of pink, and his ears burned bright red. you figured you were just as bad, as you laid naked in front of him. his eyes casted over your entire body, taking it all in.

“you’re so beautiful,” peter seemed completely awestruck, “like fuck. can you do something for me princess?”

“what’s that?” you bit your lip.

“please sit on my face,” his question was more a plead as the words tumbled out of his mouth, “i want you to ride my face.”

“peter i don’t know,” your were unsure. it had been a while since you tried that position with him, and you didn’t want to suffocate your own boyfriend.

“i’ll still be able to breathe baby,” peter chuckled, as if he was reading your thoughts, “please? i need to taste my princess.”

his words were enough. you nodded, and peter laid on his back. nervously, you swung one leg over his body, and he pulled you closer to where he wanted you. once you were situated, his eyes met yours once more.

“just relax,” peter cooed, gently kissing each one of your thighs.

his tongue found your clit, going in slow, circular motions. a moan escaped your lips, only encouraging peter to keep going. one hand was on the small of your back to keep you steady, the other reaching up for your breasts. he began to suck slightly, which drove you closer and closer to your orgasm. god, you had missed this. peter knew exactly what you loved, and he showed no signs of slowing down either.

peter glanced up at you, watching as you moaned for him. his tongue slowly began to lick up and down, “such a good girl, keep moaning for me. i love when you’re loud.”

your moans echoed off the walls as peter continued to lick all over your pussy. his fingers tugged at your nipples, and you could feel your orgasm coming. you came without warning, your vision becoming blurry. your thighs trembled as pleasure washed all over you. peter gave your pussy one final lick, sending a shudder through your body.

“are you okay?” peter’s voice was no longer demanding. it was more gentle and soft. he helped you off his body, laying down with you in the bed. he began to trace his fingers down your exposed back, going in slow, soothing motions.

you nodded, “just tired, now.”

peter smirked, “did i wear you out?”

“just a little bit,” you scoffed, rolling over.

“don’t roll away from meeee,” he protested, wrapping you up in his arms, “i love you, princess.”

“i love you too,” you whispered, giving him a chaste kiss.

peter sighed with content, pulling you closer to his body. the door to your room was shut, so your parents wouldn’t bother the two of you. as you began to run your fingers through your hair, peter began to drift off. soon enough, he was out, his chest rising and falling. it wasn’t too long after that you fell yourself yourself.

coming home to peter was your favorite thing in the world.

#peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker smut #tom holland #tom holland x reader #mcu spiderman #mcu imagine #mcu universe #spiderman x reader #spiderman homecoming #spiderman #spider-man

[jovialyouthmusic]

Past Times

Time passes at Laxton, and following her frank talk with Dorothea, Elizabeth understands a little better what married life will be like.

Word Count 1878

A/N NSFW and NO UNDER 18s

12b A Very Personal Revelation

Dinner was a pleasant affair, and conversation flowed freely as all related to each other what they had done for the day. John begged for attention in order to relay who was to arrive the next day to stay overnight or longer for the ball.

‘Lizzie, the MacDougal family will take a suite in the west wing for two nights. I believe you are good friends with young Miss Rosanna?’

‘Oh that will be marvellous. I look forward to hearing all about her new beau. I understand he will come for the ball, for his family live very close’ She felt her heart lift with joy at the thought of sharing confidences with her childhood friend.

‘That is so, my dear.’ John replied ‘Tomorrow we also expect the Beaumont family, whose daughter I understand to be a friend of yours, Miss Amelia. They will stay for longer as it is a tedious journey back to their estate north of the city. I’m sure you will be pleased to have someone closer to your own age to spend time with’ Amelia beamed happily.  She was also looking forward to seeing the Mc Dougals, for as well as Rosanna being her sister’s particular friend, her brother Scott was her age and the two of them had played together as children. She didn’t think it proper to mention her fervent wish to see him, but held it as a secret known only to herself.

The time after dinner was spent in a similar way to the previous night, with Dorothea again playing so they might practice their dancing, followed by Elizabeth playing in order for her sister to sing. Lady Charlotte was in good spirits but again retired early to conserve her strength, closely followed by the rest of Elizabeth’s family. Again she was permitted half an hour without her chaperone in the company of John, Tom and Dorothea. This was a mixed blessing, for although she enjoyed her friends’ company, she longed to be alone with John. She could act as she might when they were married, but being observed was not ideal.

They played cards – this time an ordinary game playing for matchsticks, and after a while Tom and Dottie fell to arguing over a particular hand. Elizabeth gave John a longing look and leaned closer to him, reaching out to touch the back of his hand.

‘John dear, much as I am content with company, I long to be alone with you. Can we not engineer some diversion before Morag accompanies me to my room?’ she whispered. ‘I cannot fathom why father still persists on her being present when our betrothal is set’

‘Your father is over cautious, I think, and your mother likewise’ he murmured back in a low tone. ‘When we are wed this will seem but a short time, but I too wish to be alone with you.’ He looked over at the other couple, still bickering. He tapped on the table and they fell silent. Tom looked over at him, frowning slightly.

‘Can we not disagree over the hand we are dealt? Dottie insists that I am somehow cheating’

‘That is unfortunate indeed’ John replied ‘I am sure that Morag can hear every word and is much entertained’ He winked widely, and nodded toward the heavy curtains that were drawn over the doors that lead out to the gardens at the rear of the house. A look of understanding passed between the two friends, and Tom leaned over to whisper in Dottie’s ear. She gave a knowing look to Elizabeth and nodded. The two of them went back to arguing loudly, and John rose, taking his fiancée’s hand. Quietly he lead her toward the heavy curtains. He drew them aside a crack and silently opened the door to the evening air.

‘Tom will provide a diversion’ he explained ‘Not enough for Morag to want to enter the room, but enough for us to have a few moments alone. The night is warm and the moon is full’ Elizabeth stepped out into the night air and took a deep breath, closing her eyes in bliss. They did not move far from the door so that they might hear if they were called back in.

She realised how much she had felt stifled – the lack of social freedom, the stuffiness of the room, even the restriction of her clothes, her stays laced just a little too tight that morning. She pulled her shawl around her shoulders to guard against the cool air and John drew her into his warm embrace. The grounds had an air of enchantment as the moon cast its silvery glow, but the real magic lay in her fiancé’s arms. She sighed in contentment.

‘I never want this moment to end’ she said as she laid her head to his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart. It was not long before that was not enough, and she drew away to lift her face up to his for their lips to meet in a fervent kiss. They parted for breath and she felt her pulse racing. She heard him sigh contentedly.

‘I am fortunate indeed to have found you. My days were dull and lonely, and now I look forward to our future together’ Elizabeth felt a little thrill run through her, for in truth she was looking forward to being quite alone that night, thanks to Dorothea’s advice.

‘John’ she prompted ‘I spoke with Dorothea, and she told me much about the things we may do when we are wed’ In the moonlight she saw John’s eyes glitter as they locked with hers.

‘Is that so? What has she told you?’

‘She told me the particulars of how a woman comes to be with child, and how to postpone it’ He held her close.

‘I am glad you have someone of your sex to confide in. How do you feel about what she said?’

‘I am full of curiosity. She also told me that I should prepare myself for our wedding night’ She heard him take a sharp intake of breath and shift slightly.

‘Now I too am curious. Can you share what that might involve?’ His voice was a little hoarse and Elizabeth weighed her words carefully.

‘She told me that – that I should explore my body and discover what pleases me, so I may in turn let you know…’ her voice trailed away. John took a shuddering breath.

‘Dorothea has given you good advice. What can be done together can also be done apart - to some degree’ He smiled ruefully. ‘Should you prefer to keep some details to yourself until we are wed I would respect that.’ He fixed her with his gaze.  ‘You should know that I think of you every night when I go to my bedchamber, and in my mind imagine what it will be like when we are united in bliss.’ A delicious shiver ran down Elizabeth’s spine, but at that moment there was a movement from the curtains leading back inside, and Dorothea poked her head through.

‘You must haste back in, Lizzie, for your chaperone has knocked to signal you have but a minute or two left’ John pulled her close for one last kiss before they hurried back inside to answer Morag’s summons.

------

As she had done the night before, Elizabeth practiced undressing, now knowing something of what would happen on her wedding night. As before, she looked at herself in the mirror, this time with a sense of anticipation and expectation, and went to the bed where her nightdress lay ready for her.

She looked at it for a while, thinking that the long garment would impede the exploration of her body, and decided to slip between the sheets naked. She intended to put it on when she got up to relieve herself in the chamber pot under the bed before Jane came in and discovered her state of undress. She wondered if Jane would still attend her when she was married,. She had worked for the family for many years, and had looked after both her and her sister. She resolved to ask her mama the next day.

But now she lay between the crisp white sheets, skin bare to the fabric’s fragrant coolness, the weight of the blankets and coverlet moulding the bedclothes to her body. She felt her nipples tighten to hard little buds, as they often did when it was cool, but this was different. They tingled as she lay thinking of John, and she pressed her palm to a smooth globe, feeling the tip with her thumb. Although she brushed it but lightly, she gasped as it sent an electric shock through her, to her very core. She was undecided as to whether the sensation was pleasant or not, as it was very intense.

It was not as if she had never touched herself, but her mother had warned her against doing so, telling her it was not ladylike. Perhaps her meaning and intent was that she was too young, and now that she was to be wed, perhaps it was permissible. She remembered Dottie’s words, directing her to explore her sex, but she delayed a little, letting her hand wander over her soft flat belly, shivering in anticipation. Her hand found the wiry hair at her mound, and she went lower, parting her thighs and softly stroking upwards and inwards.

She knew that it felt like large fleshy lips, and sometimes between the times when she bled, she felt different there – slicker and more sensitive. It felt very pleasurable, and she closed her eyes and thought of her beloved John – his broad chest, his warmth, the firmness of his lips when they kissed, the spark that happened when their hands touched. Warmth and tingling expanded outward from her fingers, and she moaned softly, undulating and rolling her hips.

She continued to gently stroke and probe, discovering a place that felt harder than the surrounding flesh that gave her the most pleasure and which was very sensitive. She paid attention to it and could barely control her movements or the noises she made as the pleasurable sensations increased. Her heart pounded and she wondered if she might die from it, but she could not stop. Her body demanded attention and governed the pressure and speed her fingers moved.

She gasped as it all reached a plateau, resulting in a pulsing and intense tingling that left her shuddering, shaking and gasping. Her back arched and she trembled all over with the intensity before she was still and her hand fell away, a languorous glow spreading though her entire body. That hard little nub had felt for a few moments like the centre of the cosmos, sublime and exquisite. She lay panting and shaking, laughing softly. How much more might it be with a loving partner? How had this all been hidden from her? She felt as if she had been asleep and now woke to a new life – or she would at least approach it in the company of her betrothed. She lay a while thinking over all the possibilities that were now open to her, but soon fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

@sirbeepsalot​ @camillemontespan​​ @dcbbw​ @rainbowsinthestorm​ @katedrakeohd​ @trappedinfandoms​ @kingliam2019​ @nomadics-stuff​ @texaskitten30​ @princess-geek​ @texaskitten30 @fluffyfirewhiskey

#past times #period drama #Elizabeth Dalgeish #elizabeth and john #regency drama #perioddrama #regency period drama

[evieebun125]

ookk this took a lot more energy then expected and i lost steam near the end but here a comic i drew for this thread i made over on twitter

I’ll put my ramblings under a readmore so i take up less of your dash lmao

also pardon the weird style, i didn’t have enough energy to go full painting or full lines haha i hope its not too jarring

I've been thinking about this since I first saw the God aus for erasermight lmao

 I always like the thought of ofa working similarly from canon to the God au in that it's passed on to another

 There isn't one God of ofa but many reincarnations in the terms of them choosing a new one to take their place

 They have a shrine, it depicts the first God, but they only have one worshiper.

 The chosen ofa holder is both a God and the caretaker of the shrine

The sole priest if you will

 Yagi has been the oldest and longest incarnation of Ofa, he gives his blessings to warriors wishing to be victorious in battle.

 He's kind to the villagers that border close to his shrine, he works his miracles without anyone being the wiser

 Aizawa is a knight, or mostly a knight trainer only called out when there's really a bad Situation.

 He doesn't necessarily have anything against all might personally but he's not someone who relies on the gods

He thinks only fools ask for blessing from beings that most likely don't exist and who don't care for them if they do Then hes in battle, close to the shrine. He's hurt and his strength is waning and he's struggling to protect his students.

 Then a miracle happens and the field lights up. All might rains golden spears down chasing away those who don't fall to his blades.

 They don't see him but Aizawa is haunted by the realization that they are real.

 He's tended to by the lone priest. His children are cared for, he's safe and he finds himself falling for the quiet older man

 He finds out in a private moment that midoriya is a priest in training, he was getting his Knighthood so that he may protect his shrine when his time comes.

 He eventually must leave, pulled away by duty but now that he knows the shrine exists he finds himself there over and over again.

 yagi is always working , always putting his all in and aizawa falls for him Eventually the battle of kamino happens. He must call upon all might for aid, the God afo is seeking to overthrow the kingdom and they're at their wits end.

 Yagi gives him this quiet smile, yes of course he will call upon the God to help them. Don't worry he has his blessing. And it's mayhem. Bolts of lighting in the sky, the wind tearing threw the battlefield. His men are dying, and aizawa is faltering.

 He's tired and he's too close. He can see the God that's been hell-bent on destroying them.

 And then he sees all might and his breath is punched Out of him.

 A shimmering form of gold against a curtain of black. He watches the two forces battle it out, he's clinging to the earth. Struggling to watch the booming conflict.

 Then he watches the golden God banishing afo. Gold wind rips through the field and aizawa clings and Clings too stubborn, too desperate to see what will happen to let the winds blow him away.

 And then he watches the glow fade, the dusts settles and yagi us standing there and aizawa heart is in his throat.

 He rushes in, catching the man as he collapses.

 He brings the man home Heals him, running on autopilot before it hits him. He was taking care of a God.

 Had been seeing a God for months, had fallen in love with a God.

 Aizawa couldn't handle it any longer and then

Yagi opened his eyes.

 Tired pain filled eyes, no different then they had been the Night before. He give him a weak smile and shouta doesn't care anymore. About his friend being a God, about how embarrassing and horrifying this all was.

 He holds him and yagi laughs, a beautiful sound and aizawa doesn't even realize he spoke but the words were on his lips, true " I love you" and yagi is smiling up at him, his eyes crinkling with joy.

 "I love you too" and then the cry.

 There's so much to talk about, to learn about each other but the pure relief of them both living through this is enough for now.  

Anyway thanks for putting up with my nonsense! ily have a good day

#erasermight #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #aizawa shouta #toshinori yagi #all might #au #mha au #bnha au #god yagi

[oksanasanna]

Is 2x07 your favorite because of villaneve (ear)phone sex?

I could write a whole essay on why 2x07 appeals so much to me specifically

I know no one likes Aaron, but I love him. I relate to him a lot (minus the murder and the billion dollars). I’m obsessed with his speech about how he never gets lonely, has no desire for human interaction, and would rather observe people’s lives from afar. I’m the same way, and he’s the only other person real or fictional I’ve ever seen who also doesn’t experience loneliness.

Rome. I studied Latin and Classical Culture in college.

Villanelle gorging on pasta, my favorite food. It’s soo satisfying watching her absolutely stuff her face. I completely understand Aaron’s weird kink.

The bread hand touch.

Bread in general. I would also like to watch Villanelle eat bread and ice cream and chocolate and pasta. Those are the best food groups. Again, Aaron’s onto something.

Eve fixing her hair for Villanelle before going to give her the mic.

The atelier jacket is one of my fave Villanelle outfits.

I also enjoy the outfit Villanelle first wears when she gets to Rome. And the outfit she wears to the lunch date. Billie’s outfits are on point the whole episode, and I love that scene of Villanelle being amazed by all her new clothes in Rome.

I love Billie.

“I don’t like rich men.”

“I will not be needing the pill.”

“Ugh, get a room” and the way you can hear Villanelle’s wet smile after she says it.

The way Villanelle asks for the shepherd's pie recipe and then repeats all the ingredients to herself under her breath to memorize it.

“Always close the curtains. You never know what kind of pervert might be outside.”

“See? That wasn’t so hard was it?” ‘Are you going to leave us alone now?” “Of course not. Why don’t you sit down.”

“The sexy maths teacher.”

Eve’s wide awake speech was Sandra’s best scene of the entire season. The way she doesn’t blink because she’s so focused on the convo and so ready to talk about Villanelle. The tears of intensity. “Are you in a relationship?” “Define relationship.” It’s so powerful.

The earpiece sex!!

The morning after softness!!

Just the fact that we got that (micro)phone sex was absolutely wild. That’s still the sexiest Villaneve have ever been, and that “good morning” and snuggle into the pillows rivals some of the best 3x08 softness. I can’t believe how blessed we were.

Edward Bluemel in his underwear. (I’m gay, but he’s my exception, don’t judge. It’s not straight if I say #NoHetero)

Hugo’s stupid smile and “hey” when he wakes up

Eve’s absolute disdain for Hugo’s entire existence when he says “hey”

“Thanks for the threesome”

Villanelle’s threesome in the beginning of the episode. That whole first scene is fabulous. The slapstick of the girls interrupting them one by one. Jealous Eve. “Thank you.” “For the sex? You’re welcome!” The sexiness of “I’m not with them when I’m with them” and the emotion of “I feel things when I’m with you.” Villanelle’s robe. “I’m not dressed.” “I don’t care.” The framing. The acting. Literally every second of that scene is a masterpiece.

Villanelle having an alley cat for 2 seconds (cats > dogs fight me)

Carolyn asking the same questions for Eve and Villanelle “Any escalation, increased attention seeking, recklessness?”

That beautifully creepy shot of Carolyn in the mirror hovering over Kenny as he watches Eve leave their house.

The way Aaron drags that poor closeted gay dude for watching Gossip Girl with his boyfriend and the way Villanelle just watches on enjoying the tea as she eats her meal and pretends she doesn’t understand Russian.

Villanelle singing and Hugo bopping along.

Hugo being a bi king calling Aaron “not bad looking”

Eve “He Could Kill the Shit out of Me” Polastri getting horny for some rando psycho dude and liking him even more when she finds out he’s killed people. It’s so fresh to see her openly flirting with someone other than Niko and really marked a turning point in their relationship. It wasn’t just that Villanelle was her exception, it was that she was a completely changed person willing to flirt with a psychopath and take advantage Hugo “Human Dildo” Chambers/Turner/Tiller just because she felt like it.

In the same vein, Hugo changing and saying “Don’t watch me. I know what you’re like” and Eve being offended because he’s right lmao

“Cooped up in a hotel room with nothing to do. How will we pass the time?”

“Set up everything in here.” “Why’s it got to be in my room?” “Because I don’t want all this shit in my room.” I love selfish Eve.

I think 2x07 was actually the peak of Dark Eve. Sure she kills someone in 2x08 and again in 3x07, but she kind of regrets it both times or at least feels guilty. In 2x07 she’s taking advantage of people and manipulating them and giving in to her own desires without a care in the world. She stands up to Villanelle when she gets jealous, she ignores Kenny’s warnings because she wants to see Villanelle, she sends herself and Hugo to Rome knowing its dangerous because she wants to see Villanelle, she flirts with the murder dude, she makes the conversation with the therapist about herself because she wants to indulge, she gets impatient with the Peel case and is quick to insult Hugo every time he disagrees with her methods, she doesn’t care when Hugo gets upset about being out of the loop with the threesome (the 2x08 coffee scene where Hugo is pissy about the night before and Eve’s only concern is that her coffee is cold has strong 2x07 energy and is an honorable mention scene). She doesn’t give a fuck about anyone but herself and Villanelle the whole episode and it’s beautiful.

“What happened to her profile?!” “I don’t know, maybe you shouldn’t have fired Kenny!”

I love Hugo with my whole heart. Aside from Aaron, Hugo is the second character I see the most of myself in. I relate to his sense of humor and I think I would probably be some rich posh douchebag boy like him in an alternate dimension. I love that he gets featured so much in the episode, and it’s really his character’s climactic episode. He finally gets to succeed in his missions of banging Eve and taking down Aaron before going down in 2x08. I just like seeing my boy happy.

Villanelle having that really stylish gorgeous piano that I wish I could have.

Eve leaving those voicemails for Villanelle and Villanelle laying down, listening to them, and stroking her scar with that giddy smile on her face.

Villanelle packing her suitcase by balling everything up and throwing it in there and then acting surprised when Konstantin finds razor wire.

The directing juxtaposition of Villanelle and Aaron entering Aaron’s (STUNNING) palazzo and Eve and Hugo checking in to their grubby hotel.

The cheeky face Hugo makes when the receptionist mistakes Eve and Hugo for a couple.

The way you completely forget about Niko and Gemma in the storage unit until the very end of the episode when you least expect it and it shows you their fate as a shocking cliffhanger juxtaposed with the morning after Villaneve softness in the scene immediately before it. What a rollercoaster. What a way to end on a high note.

Gemma’s murder is probably the most gruesome murder of the show for me. Not that I enjoy gruesome murder, but it’s another aspect of the episode that really stands out. Her face in that bag? Genuinely creepy. Yet the fragile tape is funny. It’s a great example of that blend of comedy and darkness that makes this show so unique.

The pink and black title card is one of the best opening color schemes of the whole show.

“Non Voglio Piu Rivederti” by Paola Neri and 

“Vai Tu Sei Libero” by Dalida are songs I listen to regularly

This list is an unorganized hot mess and I probably missed stuff, but you get my point.

There’s not a single weak spot in the episode. From the acting, the directing, the writing, the music, the costumes, the set design, I love every moment of every scene, and I can’t believe Emerald Fennel wrote it just for me.

#killing eve #ask #anon #2x07 #wide awake

[thesjt]

When Alan met ‘the funniest man in America’...

Our cinema reopens in May with two screenings of the classic comedy It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World starring, amongst many other ‘60s luminaries, Phil Silvers. Best known as the immortal Sgt. Bilko, Silvers also starred in the first of Alan’s shows to be seen on Broadway – How the Other Half Loves, in 1971.

In Ian Watson’s book, Conversations with Ayckbourn (Faber & Faber, 1988), Alan remembered ‘the funniest man in America’…

Phil Silvers and Sandy Denny on the cover of Playbill  © Scarborough Theatre Trust

Phil Silvers was an amazing figure. This is the fate of the star system: Robert Morley having shaped How The Other Half Loves as it was, we then looked for a man to play it on Broadway. And eventually, after going through an awful lot of people, somebody came up with the idea of Phil Silvers. He had disappeared for a bit; he hadn't been in the public eye. Sgt. Bilko he was still well loved for, and he’d got one or two Broadway successes like Top Banana under his belt, but that was some time ago, and nobody knew much about him.

We found out about Phil that he was (a) an extremely nervous man and (b) an extremely nice man. But he'd had some form of nervous breakdown. He'd had – what can I call it? – a relapse, anyway. His marriage had broken up and it had upset him enormously, and he'd got a lot of daughters, all of whom he adored and never saw, because he wasn't allowed to. Anyway, he saw in this a chance and I think everyone else saw in it a chance for him to reconstitute himself. But it was a bit therapeutic, like all these occasions.

First of all, what had gone was his memory: he couldn’t remember any of the lines. How the Other Half Loves was a tour I followed very, very closely. I was with the play more than I would ever be nowadays – I know better. I came over for the early rehearsals and the director Gene Saks [probably best known as the director of the 1967 film Barefoot in the Park, starring Jane Fonda and Robert Redford] was a man who worked day and night really hard. Anyway, I left them in the early part of rehearsals, and it all looked pretty good. I came back at the beginning of the last week and I saw a run, and it didn't look any different from when I left it. So Gene and I went out and had a cup of coffee, and he said, 'What do you think?' And I said, 'Well, er, what's been going on for three weeks?' He sat there for a very long time and I thought I’d really upset him. He suddenly thumped the table and said, 'I don’t know what's been going on for three weeks. What the blazes has been going on for three weeks?' He said, 'Nothing's been going on for three weeks! I'm going to go in there and tell them nothing’s been going on for three weeks.' So he went back and said, ‘Listen! This man has come back from England, and he's just said, "Nothing's been going on for three weeks." We're opening in a week, for God's sake.' And it turned out that one of the things that hadn't been happening for three weeks was that Phil hadn't learned his lines yet… Phil was in an extremely neurotic state. We found he was taking Valium, which wasn't helping.

The first date on the tour was Palm Beach, the Playhouse there. And we'd got Phil as far as the third act, the last scene. So we had three scenes which we felt he could get through, with a little bit of help from his friends, but after that... So we said, 'Well, OK, we’ll get there. We can rely on the prompter for a week.’ We were a little flummoxed when we saw the stage, because it did not allow for a prompter. It was, like a lot of American stages, about 180 feet across. It was enormously wide, with an enormous fore-stage, and a big, billowing curtain like a maternity dress that came round the front. There was nowhere that you could have a prompter without a loud hailer, because the prompt corner was miles from the centre of the stage. So we looked at it, and this very old producer we had said, 'well, we'll cut a hole in the fore-stage.’ But the carpenter said, 'No, you can't cut a hole in the fore-stage: it's aluminium. It's an aluminium stage. You're cutting through pure aluminium there.' Myerberg said, 'I don't care about the cost. We're having a trap, like an opera box, in the front of the stage.' So they cut this hole, amidst great protest, and down into this hole went Gene’s assistant Tom Erhardt [later Alan’s agent] with the book, because we'd made no allowance for a prompter. And when he went down this hole, he was down there from the beginning to the end, because there was no way he could get out. Well, Tom was blond and fair and thinning, and when they put the lights on, you had this bright, shining head in the middle of the fore-stage, and it looked slightly prominent!

Everyone said, 'What's that?' Myerberg said, 'We've got to darken down his head: it's reflecting the light.' So Tom was equipped with a black beret, which made him look not unlike a Provisional IRA man, crouching in a slit trench. And there he is with his script when we get to the first night. Phil's going great guns: he's doing very well. And the manager is ecstatic.

Sandy Denny and Phil Silvers in How The Other Half Loves  © Scarborough Theatre Trust

And the big maternity dress draws round again in the scene change before the last scene, and it's a thin dress, it's not a thick curtain. And you can hear through the curtain Phil's voice shouting down to Tom in his hole, 'I need you now, baby!' So, the curtains drew and Phil starts the last scene, and certainly cues are coming thick and fast and people are covering, and then he gets to one line, which was one of those lines that nobody could help him on. He says, 'Well, I... I... I... think, Bob, that... I think, Bob, that... tha...' And Tom, the prompter, is not a prompter. There's a great art in prompting, to give the right key word and to give it quickly and cleanly. And Tom has a very loud voice, and a very slow voice. So Tom gives him, 'Possibly.' Phil, by then, you can see, has got buzzing noises in his ears, and he couldn't hear if you actually screamed it at him. He said, 'I think... I think, Bob... I... I...' And Tom's voice comes again, equally loudly, 'Possibly!' 'just that... think... think, Bob… or... you know, Bob...' And a man, right at the back of the

theatre shouts, 'Possibly!' Gene says, 'Oh my God, the audience are prompting him now!' At the end of the show, we walked round and round the block. Phil was prostrate. 'The humiliation! I'm a man who made millions laugh on Sgt Bilko.' 'It's all right, Phil, don’t worry, we all have bad nights.' 'Bad night! I've been prompted by the audience!'

Eventually we get into Washington, and he's pretty well on the script, he's looking good. But by this time, he's being such a menace that nobody actually wants to know Phil, because he keeps telling you about his problems. So I'm with Phil a lot of the time. And I'm not sure if it is the Daughters of the American Revolution, but it's something similar, who have a luncheon, which they customarily invite the stars of the National Theater, Washington, to come along to. So they want, obviously, the lovely Mr Silvers and somebody else. The short straw is drawn and I get it, and I go with Phil. I said, 'Look, Phil is there. Phil will stand up. Phil will do the talk. You just sit there. And all Phil will forget to mention is that there's a show on. You tell them the dates, and where we’re playing, and the ticket prices, and where they can buy tickets.’ So I'm sitting next to Phil, and the chairwoman gets up – and Phil, I can see, is going into one of his lows. She says, 'Ladies, we have here today a man who I think can honestly be described as one of the funniest men in America, if not in the world. I'm very, very proud to present Mr Phil Silvers.’ Applause. Phil got up. He always wore his glasses with his contact lenses below them, because he was always recognised as Bilko, but he didn't need to wear them. He took off his glasses and said, 'Ladies, I know you think of me as one of the funniest men in America, and I thank you for it. But underneath this, I'm a very sad and lonely man. I suppose any man who had four darling little girls, all of whom he adored and is now unable to see...' And he went on in this vein. '...and a wife who refuses to let him see them, so he's left alone in a hotel room...'

And there's a drawing out of handkerchiefs, and mascara is running, and sniffing. Phil goes on for some ten minutes in this vein. The funniest man in America reduces the entire audience to tears. He says, 'All I can say is, if any of you are mothers who have children, God bless you. I love you all. Thank you.' And sits down. And then he turns to me, and he says, 'Knock 'em dead, baby!' I floundered on, but nobody could revive that audience.

He opened, and the play got reasonable reviews. He was very good eventually, but it was such hard work to get Phil to that pitch. What one was pleased about was that we reconstituted a very funny artist. I saw him some three years later, still the fall guy. He was playing in Bournemouth – A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum. And I happened to be there, visiting my kids at school. I said, 'It can't be Phil Silvers.' And I went along, and there was old Phil, with an audience, I suppose, a quarter full, giving absolutely everything. It was a super evening. And so I whistled round to see him. Kenneth Tynan was also round there. He knew Phil and admired him. I said, 'Terrific to see you. I'd no idea you were in Bournemouth.' He said, 'Well, there's been a foul-up, baby. You see, I'd understood l was coming over here to tour prior to a West End appearance.' l said, 'Oh, you're going to bring this into town?' He said, 'Well, I understood this.' I said, 'But it's been in, with Bob Monkhouse.' He said, 'I know. I didn't find that out till I got to Norwich.' Poor old Phil.

You can see It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World in the cinema at the SJT at 2pm and 7pm on Tuesday 25 May. Alan Ayckbourn’s 85th play, The Girl Next Door, is in the Round from 4 June to 3 July.

[neighborhoodmoonchild]

Music To My Ears (Jin x Siren!Reader)

Genre: Supernatural Au, College Au, Fluff, Angst

Warnings: Explicit language (just a bit), whole lotta angst, brief mentions of suicide, story also goes back and forth from Jin’s to Y/N’s POV, Fluuuufffff

Word Count: 9K, lets goooo

“What about Jiwoo?”

“No way.”

“There’s that girl from my psych class, Dae?” Jin scoffed and shook his head furiously.

“Anyone that shares a class with you Joon is a no-go. I want simple and easy, not a therapy session on why I’m ‘afraid’ of commitment.”

Joon shakes his head with a light chuckle, “Maybe you should be asking yourself that question.”

Jin laughs at his friend like he’s the funniest thing in the world, when Joon knows very well he’s not.

“Easy, I’m not afraid, I just don’t need a girlfriend right now. Monogamy is boring.”

Yoongi pulls his headphones off completely this time and turns to the two idiots taking up all the space on his bed, “Then why even bother with girls at all. Try flying solo for a while.”

That earns him a long, exaggerated eye roll.

“Because Yoongles, a man has needs.” If there was one quality Jin didn’t have, it was subtlety.

Being the most popular, handsome, and eligible guy on campus (self-coined, in case you couldn’t tell) was both a blessing and a curse. The pressure to pursue and please was insurmountable, and while Jin enjoyed a good challenge, he just wanted to relax and have some harmless fun while he could.

College wouldn’t last forever, and the endless pool of easy, available, no-strings-attached hook-ups died along with it, so Jin made it his mission to make the best of his last year here.

Only rule: girls in his dorm? OFF LIMITS. He made that mistake first year, and he still gets the stink eye from Yeri every time he goes to wash his clothes, and don’t even get him started on the various times the lights just “happened” to go out while he was taking a shower.

Everyone else is fair game and no repeats allowed. Some would call him a player, but he prefers opportunistic. I mean, campus is just serving him all of these gorgeous women on a silver platter, so what’s he supposed to do?

A painful groan breaks Jin from his thoughts, his attention flicking to the dark haired man now leaning so far back in his chair, it might just snap in half.

“Look, all I’m saying is that nothing good can come from your little ‘quest,’ ok?”

A snort from the eldest causes Yoongi to spin around and chuck his notebook at him, exasperation clear on his face.

“Except everything about it. No feelings, no mess, just fun.”

“Just because you don’t acknowledge the mess, doesn’t mean it’s not still there,” Yoongi counters, earning silence from his friends.

Jin ponders for a moment. Sure, sometimes he picked the wrong target and things got a little weird, but it couldn’t be that bad, right? It’s not like they didn’t know what they were getting into with him, he’s a pretty open book, ask anyone.

Then again, it’s not like he stuck around long enough to really gauge the outcomes, and to be honest, he doesn’t think he will be for a while. It may seem selfish, but come on, it’s not like any of these girls aren’t getting anything out of it, and he sees how some of them walk around all high and mighty afterwards. If anything, they’re using him just as much as he’s using them. Why not play the game if it’s a win-win?

The conversation on that dies out as quickly as it came, and after laughing about Joon’s mishap with his zipper in Physics for a solid 30 minutes, Yoongi gets fed up and kicks them out so he can finally study.

The walk back to his room is uneventful. His dorm is rather quiet at night, all the partying and adult shenanigans happens in Seo Hall or down the street at Phi Beta Nu. Jin loved a good kegger as much as the next guy, but the betas are just too stuck up their own asses you have to be fully inebriated to have any fun.

As he rounds the hall, he sees a slight steam sweep through the doorway to the communal bathrooms. If he were up to it, he totally would’ve messed with whoever was in their so late at night, but after the conversation with Yoongi and Joon, he couldn’t bother.

Usually his friends would be excited or at least fake being into his dumb conquests, but he could tell they were starting to worry about him. Jin wasn’t always like this, looking for easy and replaceable love, but after his girlfriend of almost 2 years broke up with him before they both started junior year, he just didn’t see the point in the long-term when it would all just fall apart in the end.

Jin was tired of putting in so much time and effort only to get slapped in the face and his heart ripped in two. No, the easiest way to protect your heart from breaking was to pretend you didn’t really have one, or at least use a fake while the real one is hidden away.

‘Love’ everyone but truly love no one.

Suddenly, he’s stopped just beyond the bathroom doorway, a sweet and soft voice dripping from the warm and damp air like fresh honey for only him to savor. It wasn’t uncommon for people to belt it out when they were alone in the shower, but this was something so uniquely and incredibly different, it pulled him in without any resistance.

Jin was not a pervert by any means, he’s always respectful and gentlemanly when it counted, and he knows it certainly doesn’t look that way as he carefully tiptoes through the doorway to find the source of the melody turning his insides to jelly and making his heart beat a little faster than normal.

Jin knew, he KNEW, this was a bad idea, but something inside him just told him to keep going. He could pinpoint the exact stall it was coming from, could almost see her outline through the curtain, when the singing stopped.

So lost in his haze, Jin didn’t even realize he knocked over an empty caddy by one of the stalls, causing a light bang, and indicating to the mystery girl that she was no longer alone.

Before he could process what was happening, Jin was out of the bathroom as fast as lightning, the sound of her curtain ripping open spurring his feet to move faster. He was out of there and hiding behind the corner like a crazy person, praying to God he wasn’t found out.

Jin had never ever done something like this before, and he was hoping the first time he messed up would not be the time he got caught.

The water now off, he could hear her footsteps as she slowly peeked out from the doorway, searching for the suspect. Jin’s heart beat so loud he was scared she’d find him by that alone.

It was quiet for a moment, and Jin let himself sneak a peek past the edge of the hall, hoping to catch a glimpse of this mystery girl. To his surprise, all he got was a flash of hair, the red color tinting her cheeks, and the fluffy pink of her robe as she quickly made her way down the hall towards her room.

He didn’t want to keep watching, anxious she’d feel his eyes and turn back and see him, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away. Her stature, the curve of her body, the sway of her hair against her shoulders and back, it was so mesmerizing, and he could not for the life of him get her voice out of his head.

After she was locked away in her room, Jin began his retreat to his, only looking back once in the direction of her door.

‘No dorm mates, remember that,’ he repeated in his mind, over and over and over again. But no matter how hard he tried to hear that like a mantra in his mind, her voice was louder than any thought he could provide.

-

You were still a bit paranoid after last night. You lived in a dorm for heavens sake, and a coed one at that, of course other people would be in the bathroom. Usually, you waited late enough for everyone to be either gone partying, studying, or on the rare occasion, sleeping.

After all, you didn’t see anyone, it was probably just your brain making things up thanks to too many late nights binging horror flicks.

Still, you couldn’t help feeling wary. You rarely break your ‘no voice’ rule, but you just couldn’t help yourself sometimes. You missed letting the notes and melodies fall from your lips, no matter how dangerous it could be.

Late night showers with the water masking the sound became the only way you were able to take a break from playing mute. You didn’t like lying to people, but you just couldn’t risk it.

Not after what happened last time.

With your backpack strapped safely to your back and arms cradling your notebook, you cautiously made your way to class. You made it a habit of trying to avoid eye contact with everyone all together. Sometimes even a look could draw them in, so pushing everyone away was best.

Of course, this was nearly impossible to do as a student, but you learned ways to keep it at bay. Hide yourself in as many layers as you could, don’t wear anything eye-catching, keep your head down, and never stay too long.

You even requested a room to yourself, in fear a roommate would stir up unnecessary trouble, and you wanted to get through college as incident-free as possible after first year.

Of course, all of these precautions didn’t stop the trouble all together. When you first came to school, people, especially guys, were all over you. They’d cast the shy card, the innocent card, and when you wouldn’t fall into their traps, they’d casted you out all together.

The shy girl everyone wanted became the prude people avoided.

Albeit it was a bit lonely at times, you remembered that you weren’t here to make friends, you were here to get an education. On you couldn’t get where you were from, and one you had fought fiercely to obtain.

You weren’t going to let that be ripped away from you by a little bout of loneliness.

You made it to class with a few minutes to spare, your notebooks and pencils taking their places sprawled across your desk as you awaited instruction.

Class went by slower than usual, and you couldn’t help but feel like someone was watching you. You weren’t a stranger to wandering eyes, but they usually lost interest rather quickly. This time, however, you could tell every time they’d wander back to you, and you knew better than to indulge and find the culprit.

Instead you ignored it, trying hard to focus on the lesson, and then suddenly, class is over and you realized you missed the assignment.

After waiting a few minutes for people to clear out, you made your way down to the professor, one you’d met plenty of times before, and began to sign.

Learning sign language was a skill that helped tremendously. Suddenly, you went from racing to write your thoughts out on paper, to being able to have sort-of easy flowing conversations when needed. Most were more than happy to accommodate you, bringing in an interpreter and some even knew a few basic signs to talk with you. For the the less forgiving ones, you still carried around your pad and pen.

You asked him if he would repeat the assignment due for next week, hands a bit shaky. You weren’t the best, but it was understandable. He happily obliged, and you took down the information on your planner.

After thanking him, you turn to head out, when a pair of eyes meet yours.

-

Jin couldn’t even escape this girl in his dreams. Suddenly, her voice echoed through every cavity of his brain, the image of her hair flowing as she walked down the hall distracting him from his daily tasks.

Now he was on the verge of being late for class and he couldn’t help but blame the girl a bit. He knew he was just being petty, but how could someone like her have evaded him for so long? How had he not noticed her before?

He was a charmer, a magnet for girls like her, so how had she slipped right through his fingers? Jin admittedly was more interested in the mystery right now than the girl herself, but he seemed that they are one in the same. After all, he couldn’t really be interested in someone he had never met before. And he didn’t even know why he was so taken in the first place.

Jin now made it his new mission to find out who this girl was, whether she wanted to be  found or not. He needed answers; why was she up so late? Why did her voice effect him so? Why had he never seen her before now?

When he finally stumbled into Psych, he never expected he’d find his suspect so soon. Yet, there she was, a few rows ahead of him, hair pushed behind her ears, supplies all laid out before her, and he didn’t mean to, but all he can do is stare.

How fate had lined this up so perfectly for him and what he did to deserve it, he wasn’t sure. All he knew was that now that he could see her properly, in the daylight and not hiding behind a corner, the beating of his heart sped up so fast he was sure he might have a heart attack right there.

After intensely staring at her for a few seconds, he could sense the change in her demeanor, knew she could tell he was staring. He tried multiple times to pay attention to the lecture, but he just couldn’t seem to hold his focus on anything accept her.

He desperately did not want to make her feel uncomfortable, yet he could tell that’s exactly what he was doing. He could slap himself for it, now she’d never give him the time of day.

Jin spent so much time going back and forth with himself over what to do, he didn’t realize class had already come to a stop and people were filing out. As he snapped himself out of it, stuffing his things back into his bag, he saw that girl get out of her seat.

The bounce of her hair when she walked towards the professor made his stomach do flips, but he pushed the feeling aside to be reasonable. Was she pretty? Yes. Was he attracted to her? As much as you can be to a stranger, he guesses.

He watched as she rose her hands, moving them quickly albeit shakily, and the professor responded to her, giving her the notes for the assignment, which she quickly jotted down.

Now, that was interesting. Why was she using her hands to communicate when she could’ve just spoken to the professor? Jin was even more intrigued than he was before.

Just as he was about to leave them to it, she turned around, instantly locking eyes with him. Jin wasn’t sure what to do. Does he say hi? Pretend it never happened and flee? But before he could choose an option, you were already on your way towards him.

-

You weren’t planning on confronting him, but he was conveniently still there, standing, staring.

You’d never seen this boy before, but then again, you never made it your mission to remember names and faces. After all, they would never be permanent.

This time, however, something stirred inside you. A feeling like fate, maybe, wanted you to take initiative just this once.

You couldn’t pinpoint what exactly in him drew you forward, to believe that this was all okay and that you weren’t making a big mistake again.

Maybe it was the way his warm brown eyes seemed to grow when you caught his gaze.

Perhaps it was his lopsided smile as he internally decided what to do.

Good looks were something that obviously came naturally to him, but it wasn’t that.

No, you could feel something different emanating from him.  

A hidden warmth so purely good you couldn’t help but let it pull you in, no matter how scarily quick it was causing all your protective walls to crumble to the ground.

Stopping just in front of him, you tilt your head a bit to the side, questioning.

He just stares for a moment, realizes what he’s doing, and quickly plays it off cool, his hand coming to scratch the back of his neck.

“Hi, um, my name’s Jin. Nice to meet you.” His hand shoots forward to grasp yours, fingers sliding against one another’s and then falls back to his side.

You take a minute to think. He probably doesn’t know sign language. Maybe I should get my pad out.

You reach in your bag for your paper, when he clears his throat.

“You can talk, right?” He asks, but his tone is edging more towards statement, like he already knows the answer.

You freeze. Lying to him felt wrong, more wrong than it did with everyone else, which was incredibly strange due to him being a complete stranger.

You retract your hands, and look back up at him, shaking your head no.

His expression turns to confusion, which you quickly mirror. It’s when he notices your face that he scrambles to explain.

“It’s just...” he takes a deep sigh, “I heard you. The other night.” He stops, looking into your eyes for understanding. You don’t get the hint, so he continues.

“I was walking back to my room last night, and I heard someone singing in the shower. Their voice was so beautiful. So I waited around a bit, and I saw you leave.”

You can feel the flush rise up through your cheeks, staining every inch of your face in utter embarrassment and fear.

How could you have been so stupid?

Shaking your head no so vigorously it might fall off, you quickly rush past him. You needed to get out of there. Create some distance; a LOT of distance. No way were you going to make the same mistake again.

Expecting him to just drop it, you’re surprised when his footsteps echo behind you.

“Wait, I didn’t mean to make you upset... I just-“ but before he could finish, you whip around, throwing your arms up, signaling him to stop.

You rip your pad and pen from your bag, and scribble out your frustration.

His eyes drop from yours to the pad in front of him.

“Just leave me alone. Please.”

You turn to leave, but he steps in front of you.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? Why can’t you just talk to me. I know you can.” He seemed almost upset with you. How could he be upset with you?!?

“None of your business. Goodbye.” You shove it in his face and once he’s flustered, you make your escape.

Making your way back to your dorm, fuming at the absolute audacity of this guy, you make a mental note to never trust yourself again when it comes to stupid feelings. I mean, how the hell you had felt any warmth in him was beyond you. How dare he act like he knows you. He doesn’t know a damn thing!

You were so caught up in mentally beating the shit out of this ‘Jin’ guy, you didn’t even notice him walk past you and go into his room just down the hallway.

-

“And then she just shoves her notebook in my face and walks off! What the hell?”

To say Jin is thoroughly aggravated would be an understatement.

He could deal with a girl just not being interested in him, whatever, but for a girl to make him feel stupid like that?

He wasn’t sure about a lot of things, but he was 100% sure that that girl was the one he heard singing in the bathroom the other night. He feels it in his bones.

“Well, you did basically accuse her of faking being mute or whatever.” Yoongi was only half painting attention to the conversation, once again mind clouded with all of the work he had to do. Jin could tell, but he was too frazzled to care.

Sure, he definitely could’ve handled the situation better, but everything about her made him nervous, and then she shuts him down, without so much as a second thought? She didn’t even know him for heavens sake, how could she treat him like he was just some douche?

“I didn’t mean to, I was trying to be nice, but she is just so frustrating. I didn’t demand she tell me her life story, I just know she can talk and I wanted to hear her voice again.” Yoongi ignored him, so Jin sighed as loud as he could and left the room.

As he was walking back to his room, he passed your door. He took a quick glance at the name sprawled across the little cut-out butterfly that the floor advisor made for all the tenants. Y/N.

Her negativity towards him should’ve deterred him, even stopped him all together. Oh, but that’s not how Jin works. Now he had even more of a reason to figure this Y/N out. He was going to get her to talk to him if it was the last thing he did.

In his room, he grabs his laptop and starts researching sign language. If she wants to play hard ball, I’ll learn the game.

Despite his love of simple and easy, Jin couldn’t resist this challenge, and he couldn’t help but feel like this was an opportunity he couldn’t pass up.

Forget one night stands, he wanted to, scarily enough, put in the work for this one. Something in his heart was telling him you’d be worth the effort.

He’d find a way to get to you, no matter how long or hard it’d be.

Jin understands having secrets and your right to keep them, but what could be so bad about a voice?

-

After as peaceful of a night’s sleep as you could get in a dorm, you had almost completely forgotten about the encounter with Jin yesterday. Keyword: almost.

It could’ve just been completely forgotten all together if he hadn’t been standing outside your door as soon as you walked out for class, an annoying smirk plastered to his smug little face.

You were startled, which only seemed to make his smile grow, as if annoying you made his entire day. The dynamic you two had developed over less than a full day of knowing each other was nothing short of absolutely insane. How could two complete strangers suddenly be so ‘comfortable’ around each other?

Obviously Jin was more comfortable with you than vice versa, considering he went from listening to you in the shower, to confronting you in class, to now waiting for you outside your room. Either this guy is incredibly bold or incredibly stupid.

One glance might see a friend waiting outside your dorm to walk you to class. Another might see a stalker waiting for their prey. You knew Jin was just curious, it wasn’t something you hadn’t encountered before, so you entertained the thought that he just might lie somewhere in between those two extremes just to humor yourself.

He approached you, carefully, his demeanor shifting, softening, like he didn’t want to press you. Maybe he just has one of those faces that always looks annoying for some reason.

You prepared yourself to walk away, to shake your head, give him the finger, stomp on his foot, you don’t know, just something, anything to get him off your back.

He would probably say something incredibly ignorant without meaning too and you’d have to take it in one ear and out the other without taking it to heart. After all, you didn’t want to fight with him. You didn’t really want anything to do with him considering your history and his revelation about a few nights before.

But as you lifted your hand to back him off, he started moving his hands in a fashion you had become familiar with. You watched the motion of his hands, the shapes he creates, the orientation of his palms, and realizes he’s trying to sign to me.

This kid. This fucking kid, who you just met yesterday, one you had definitely gotten off on the wrong foot with, spent his night, which could’ve been used to party, study, whatever. He spent it on learning some sign language. He spent all night practicing signs so he could talk to you.

Not sure whether you should be flattered or frustrated that he now could technically talk to you in a way you couldn’t just blatantly ignore, you stood, mouth gaped as he continued to move his hands over and over again.

It was sloppy, obviously, but the idea was there. He never took his eyes from you, waiting for you to understand and respond.

“I’m sorry,” he signs, “can we start over?” The look on his face closely resembles regret. He was actually apologizing. A college guy apologizing for acting like a jerk? Well, this was a first.

You wanted to forgive him right away. Honestly, he was just being normal. It’s not his fault you had a secret. You knew you overreacted, but you honestly wanted to throw him for a loop first. See if he could keep up with you, if it would be worthwhile to indulge in conversing and learning about one another, even though it broke all of your rules.

This was the first real contact you’d had in a long time, and you kind of missed it now that you’d had a taste.

You desperately want to break into a stupid grin, but remain stoic, which sends a rigid chill through Jin. He’s nervous you won’t accept his apology. That you’d hate him forever and he’d never get to know you, the real you.

“Why should I?” It takes him a minute and you repeating it once more for him to finally understand what you’re saying. He’s not surprised, after all, you don’t know him, he doesn’t know you, there is no basis of trust established, and all you had was his bad impression from yesterday to go on.

He thinks, mulling over in his head not only a proper response, but how to sign it well enough you’ll understand.

“I don’t know,” he thinks again, “just a feeling we could be friends.” He chuckles a bit at his awful signing, which he can tell is as bad as he thinks just by the confused way your eyes move following his hands and face.

It was honest. No bullshit. No lines. He was telling the truth, a truth you knew and felt on your own. Something drew you to him, you could feel it from the moment you locked eyes with him. After what happened the last time you let yourself get too close to someone, you were eager to push this feeling away to avoid repeating old mistakes.

Something about this one, though, felt different. It’s like he wasn’t seeing the side of you that lured people in. He was seeing the side of you that just wanted to be normal. The you that could put up a cool, collected front but easily break it down with your stubborn, childish, annoying side.

The you that was usually so well hidden from the outside world. Jin brought out the real you, the human in you.

It was too much to ask of a stranger, yet here he was, putting in the work and then some, just for the minuscule chance you might accept him, let him into your world.

He wasn’t looking for much, he just wanted to know you. You seemed like this perfect, put together girl that could have the world wrapped around your finger if you wanted. Yet you blockaded yourself from the joys and wonders of life, and he wanted desperately to understand why. Not for selfish purposes, but because he could see that you were forcing yourself to stand alone.

After all, he is the complete opposite. He has the world wrapped his finger and he knew it, exploiting it and taking all it offered him. Compliments, opportunities, lovers, they were his for the taking and he happily indulged. He couldn’t see how you could have the same opportunity and blatantly ignore it.

He could tell you weren’t happy just by looking in your eyes. The way you avoided him and others, how you went straight from class to your unshared room. How long had you cut yourself off from the rest of the world?

Jin wanted to understand the why so he could figure out if there was a way to change your mind. To show you that life had so much to offer, so many wonderful things, that you’d want to open up, experience life in a way that would leave every day feeling better than the last.

The last thing he thought you needed was a ‘knight in shining armor.’ No, you didn’t need help, he could tell you were strong, but he did think you could use a sidekick of sorts along the way. A friend, someone who indulges sometimes too much in the joys of life. Who better to show you just how fun life can be? Now all he needed was for you to be willing to let him.

Again, it was a lot for him to ask of you, a stranger, but he figured it was worth a shot. Worst case scenario, you’d tell him to bug off and never talk to him again, but you didn’t exactly talk to him much as it is, so there was nothing really to lose.

You, on the other hand, had a lot to lose.

Your first year, you had ignored the warnings of your family against going to university. You’d been homeschooled all your life to protect you, they had said. Turns out, they were actually protecting others from you.

You’d been starved of non familial human interaction, so when this kind-hearted guy paid attention to you, it made you feel special. Of course, it wasn’t as simple as you thought.

Back then you’d known little about controlling your abilities. When you spoke, it naturally affected some people more than others. This guy had been so far under your spell, it quickly edged on dangerous.

You’d tried to break things off as carefully as possible, spare him the hurt as best you could, but he wouldn’t, no, couldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

It got worse, and suddenly you found yourself sitting in a police station being questioned about his suicide and you vowed never again.

Never again would you hurt someone like that; would not only put someone else through that, but yourself as well.

Pushing people away kept them safe. You were dangerous.

And all of a sudden, this goofy, broad-shouldered idiot with a dopey smile comes crashing into your life and you can’t help but feel like you won’t be able to shake him even if you tried.

As long as you kept quiet, you figured, what was the harm in letting him hang around?

You let out an exasperated sigh, one that catches Jin’s attention as he eagerly awaits for you to sign something, anything.

“Fine. Forgiven.” Light glimmers in his eyes as he flashes you a big grin, happy with the verdict.

“Friends?” He adds, extending a hand for you to shake. You stare at his fingers, hesitant and nervous that a touch could even be a trigger. You slowly take his hand, and after finding no problem, shake.

“Do I have a choice?” You sign, and take his loud laugh and head shake as a big fat no, not that you were surprised.

He follows just behind you as you walk to class in silence, but he starts to move his hands again, and as you look over, you see, “Cool, can I copy your Psych homework?”

Instant regret.

-

Did you see that right? No way, maybe you missed something. You signal him to sign again.

“Are you Friday homework busy?” He doesn’t seem to catch on that what he said made no freaking sense whatsoever, so you sign ‘again.’

Jin rolls his eyes, repeating his hand motions for the third time, and you still can’t figure out what the hell he’s on about.

It’s been a few months since you’d started ‘hanging out,’ though 99% of the time it was Jin just following you around, watching you do homework or other mundane things, and asking you to let him copy your assignments when he couldn’t be bothered to do them himself.

It was something hard to get used to at first, but soon you found yourself falling into a rhythm with him. Suddenly he was a natural part of your every day, something you quickly looked forward too even though you you would never tell him that.

So after being around him for so long, you knew he could sign better than that. Usually he’d catch himself, laugh off the embarrassment, and let you help him get it right.

This, needless to say, was highly unusual.

Jin, on the other hand, found your confusion hilarious. He didn’t give it away that he thought as much, because he was doing it on purpose after all.

After spending a few months with you, he’d noticed how quickly you placed him into your routine. As much as he enjoyed that, he wanted to change it up. He learned a lot about you, from the way you twirl your pencil when your bored, to the way you tuck your hair behind your ears when you’re embarrassed. Even your cute ugly laugh when he does something stupid.

He loved all those things, loved that you share them with him, but you were still hiding a part of yourself, and Jin was determined to find it and uncover it. He just wants you to be completely, wholly, and unapologetically you, because to him, nothing could be better.

To say he became quite infatuated with you with every new discovery would be an understatement. He felt like a lovesick puppy sometimes, and all he wanted was to hold you in his arms and tell you dumb jokes to make you smile.

Of course, you probably only thought of him as a friend, and Jin was totally fine with that. He was just happy that you’d accepted him at all, and he wasn’t about to ruin that over what was probably just a silly crush.

So, Jin had come up with this ‘clever’ plan to get you to actually talk to him. With everything he’s learned about you, he knew how impatient you could be, especially when frustrated.

If he signs so bad you can’t understand him, you’ll quickly get fed up and open your mouth, considering you’d caught yourself almost doing so numerous times before. While Jin was also very anxious about stirring up your wrath, he thought it would most likely be worth it in the long run if he could get you to speak.

And you were quickly falling into his trap.

How in the hell was he not seeing that his structure was making zero sense? You try to sign to him, tell him to knock it off, but he just looks at you confused. He knows these signs so why is he acting like he doesn’t understand you?

You could feel a few wandering eyes, knowing fully well that they were getting a laugh out of your charades session with Jin. You could feel the heat creep up your neck, and you wanted so badly to tell him to piss off, stop messing with you, to cuss him out.

You bit your tongue for as long as you could, but the dam finally collapsed, your fist flying into his shoulder.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Quite being an asshole!” You whisper shout at him, and the cheering erupts in Jin’s mind, confetti cannons bursting, a song of victory playing on loop.

He couldn’t help the smile that quickly took over his face, no matter how intense your death glare was. He wanted to lunge forward and hug you, for you to say something again.

He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he was dying to hear his name drip from your lips, no matter the context.

“Sorry, what was that?” He prodded, softly punching your shoulder back.

Rolling your eyes, you tense at the realization you just spoke out loud. What the hell were you thinking? That was just it, you weren’t.

Your hand flies to cover your mouth, not wanting to make eye contact with Jin. You didn’t know what to expect except the absolute worse, and when he rests his hand on your knee, you look up.

His expression is sympathetic, “You know, you don’t have to be scared to talk to me.” His voice is low as to not scare you.

You search his eyes for a telltale sign that he’s affected. Usually, their eyes turn a bit hazy, but his were clear as day.

Considering you’d just cut yourself off from people as best you could, you weren’t sure if there was a possibility there were people out there that couldn’t be affected. Obviously others like you weren’t, but you could tell when you were near another sea-born, almost like a telepathic bond you had with your kind.

Jin was an enigma to say the least.

The fear that coursed through your veins subsided a bit, and it was slowly replaced with a building excitement. You might have found someone, a human none the less, that you could finally speak to. Your time of solitude might have finally been over.

Jin was scared to say anything else. He thought maybe he’d pushed you to far, been unfair, and built a new barrier between the two of you. It was when he saw the smile crawl onto your face that he realized he might have just cracked you right open.

Seeing that smile, one full of potential and excitement he didn’t quite understand, was like caffeine to the butterflies in his stomach. His heart raced a mile a minute, a warmth coursing through his veins filling him with an energy he’d never known before.

Now this was something he could get used to.

What he wasn’t expecting was for you to lunge forward and wrap your arms tightly around his neck, taking him a second to pull himself from the shock to return the hug.

“You wanna go somewhere and talk?” He asks, and your eyes light up.

You pull him up from his seat in the library, heading towards the dorms nodding your head.

“By the way,” you start, Jin following close behind you. You turn your head to look over your shoulder at him, a smirk on your face, “I know you did that on purpose, Jin.”

He knows he should’ve been worried by the tone behind your words, but once his name left your lips, that was all he could focus on the whole walk to your room.

-

“Never? Like, never ever?” Jin’s face contorts in amused surprise. He’d been questioning you for the past hour about everything under the sun, from childhood pet trauma to inappropriate crushes.

You roll your eyes, though a giggle escapes your lips, “No, I’ve never ever thought of a teacher that way.” You hold his pillow tighter to your chest as he falls over the end of his bed, clearly exasperated and not believing you for a second.

“There’s no way. There are at least, like, 3 of your professors that are, objectively, sexy as hell and you’re telling me you’ve never thought about?”

You shake your head, “Nope, not once.” The laughter easily flows from your lips as he gets frustrated.

“Yeah, sure, whatever you say.” He smirks at you, and you pretend to get defensive.

“What, and you have?” That sends him over the edge in giggles, rolling around the bed, causing the whole thing to shake, including you.

He lifts himself up and stares at you, “Of course! I’m a normal, healthy man aren’t I?” You’re not sure how to respond without laughing and making him question himself, so you just playfully smack his arm and agree.

“Fine, fine. I guess I’m just a weirdo then.”

“Amen to that!” He bounces, smirking at you, earning himself another slap. He fakes hurt and snatches the pillow from your arms, pouting.

“I may be a weirdo, but you’re just a big baby.” Your hand caresses through his brown locks, his eyes peeking from the edge of the pillow, the smile in them giving himself away.

Being able to talk to each other out loud opened many new doors for the two of you in the weeks that followed. It was exciting to get to know someone on an intimate level like this, without fear of it going south the way it had before.

It was, surprisingly, normal. The most normal you had felt in a long, long time.

Suddenly you had someone to share your thoughts and feelings with, even the most mundane of them. Friendship unlocked this whole new side of yourself you’d never experienced before.

Jin felt the same way. He didn’t realize how he was just blowing through life like it was nothing until he met you. Every minute was spent finding something new he cherished about you, instead of wasting it away with childish things like he had in the past.

He found new meaning in every day, spending more time living and having fun with you, rather than complaining about his trials and tribulations to Namjoon and Yoongi (which they were utterly grateful to you for).

You both had something to look forward to every day; each other.

In the beginning you thought you were total opposites bound for failure. Jin was this upbeat, extrovert with a wild side. You were the quiet, introvert scared of human interaction.

Turns out you both just needed a nudge to find there was more in common there than you thought.

You both could be loud, stubborn, silly, and an absolute mess.

Could be quiet, modest, and hide yourselves away.

Both could be intense and emotional, but there for the other no matter what.

Jin was the yin to your yang. You could be whatever the other needed at any specific moment in time.

You both didn’t want to admit it to each other quite yet, but he was your best friend, the only person you wanted and needed, and vice versa.

You’d never experienced love before, didn’t know what it felt like or what to expect, but you believed in your heart it had to be something like this.

As you get up off the bed to put your shoes on and head back to your room, his hand wraps gently around your wrist. It’s late, the light of the moon seeping through his blinds, and he can’t help but admire the way it lights up your face as you turn to look at him.

“Stay?” He asks, and you don’t even have to answer.

Cuddling up to each other under the multitude of blankets covering his bed, you can’t help but truly feel at peace for the first time in your life, with your head laying on his chest, the steady thrum of his heartbeat echoing through your ears as you both fall asleep.

-

You stayed in bed all day. Didn’t answer your phone when it went off, didn’t answer the door when he knocked, just stayed wrapped in your blanket, eyes focused on the clouds beyond your window.

It was the third anniversary of the incident. You didn’t know what else to call it. Black clouds hung over you, and the feeling like everything you had built with Jin would crumble the same way cast them harsher overhead.

You hadn’t even told him about it yet, amazed he had never once pushed you to do so either. Jin was curious by nature, but he knew some things about your past were off limits, and he respected that.

That didn’t stop him from worrying about the distance lately. You are his best friend, and you spent a majority of your time together. So when that came to an abrupt halt the day before, he desperately wanted to find out why so he could help pull you out it.

He missed you, and he hated knowing something was wrong that he couldn’t fix.

You were just about to pull yourself up to make a cup of tea when a loud series of knocks came from your door. You figured it was probably Jin again, but when they got harsher and faster, you decide to check just in case.

The mug you cradled in your hands fell to the floor, a light crash sounding out as it cracked into pieces.

“Shit.”

You picked them up as quickly as possible, tossing them to the trash and returning to the door.

A cold rush bled through your veins, a violent churn brewing in your stomach as you opened the door.

You didn’t even have time to prepare yourself before she was in your face, visibly distressed.

Her brown hair the same as it had been that day she locked eyes with you as you were escorted from the station, watching an officer hold her as back as she tried to go after you.

You thought she’d given up on crucifying you, or at least tried to. You never expected after three years for her to show up in person, eyes blazing in search of vengeance.

“I heard you’ve lured some new victim into your trap, where is he? Or have you already strung him up like you did Jay?” She spit, venom lacing every syllable.

You didn’t have much of a choice, so you moved away from her assault, giving her full access to search your room.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Look, Lia, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that I’m sorry.” You keep your voice soft as not to stir the pot, but it doesn’t help. She’s visibly enraged and nothing was going to change that.

She pauses her search to rush you, get in your face, causing you to retreat, but she holds you in place like a rag doll.

“I won’t ever accept your apology. You killed my brother you bitch,” her grip on your arms tighten, causing you to wince.

“If you think, even for a second, that his death wasn’t all because of you, then you’re fucking thick. If it wasn’t for you, he’d still be here!” She choked, tears streaming down her face.

Paralyzed. You felt nothing, not the warm tears on your cheeks, the grip of her hand on your arm, the sharp sting as the other made contact with your face. Even as she left and a new figure entered your line of vision, you stood there; empty.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay.” Jin wants to reach out for you, but is scared it might make things worse. It’s when you collapse in his arms he lets the breath he’d been holding in out, wrapping his arms around you, cradling you tight as you cry.

He’d never seen another person talk to you, let alone assault you like that girl just had. He was still processing everything that happened, and couldn’t help but wonder how far it would’ve gone if he hadn’t shown up.

A few minutes later, he’s holding you cuddled up in a blanket on your bed as the crying subsides.

Jin wants to ask what the hell happened, who that girl was, and why you just stood there and let her hurt you? There was no way in hell you could’ve done anything to deserve that outburst.

He peeks down at your tear stained face, red and wet snuggled into his chest. His heart felt like it was being crushed inside of him. Seeing you in such a state physically hurt him.

He hears you sniffle and looks down to see you peering up at him through wet lashes.

“I have to tell you something.”

-

Out of every possible thing you could’ve told him, this was not even in the realm of things he could’ve expected.

He was still trying to grasp the whole ‘siren’ thing, which should’ve sent him running for the hills, but the way you explained what happened with the guy first year, then the incident with his sister a few hours earlier, he didn’t think he could just walk away.

His mind and heart were in a battle, one choosing sanity and the other choosing you. The way you refused to look him in the eyes as you spilled your darkest secrets cast a heavy sadness onto him. He not only felt the pain from your words, but the pain you were feeling.

He knew he should’ve ran to comfort you, hold you, tell you it’d be alright and that it wasn’t your fault.

But a dark thought kept him rooted to his seat across the room from you.

What if it was?

He didn’t want to think this way, to believe that you could be behind something so horrible, but with the revelation of your ‘affliction’ his mind couldn’t help but wonder there.

You said it left people feeling like there was no other way. Like they were forced to pine for you, to long for you, until they couldn’t take it any more.

He’d heard stories of creatures from the sea that lured men to their deaths. Now he was face to face with one, and he was torn between the you he knew and the you he read about.

The horrid thought that everything he felt for you was all a trick made him sick to his stomach, and he couldn’t bring himself to look at you.

The last thing he wanted to do was hurt you, but once that thought took hold, he couldn’t break free from it.

He needed air, space, time to think.

All of this meant walking away from you.

A part of you knew it from the way his face dropped as you snuck a peek from the corner of your eye. It didn't stop the sinking feeling that you once again ruined everything.

You didn’t even bother looking at him as he left, missing the horrible attempt at a fake smile as he went, slightly shaking.

As Jin closed the door behind him, you both let a few tears free fall, crying for everything you had built together as it all came crashing down.

You didn’t care about Lia, the incident, anything. You just wished you’d never come here, met Jin, and hurt him. He deserved better than a monster.

And a monster is all you’d be.

-

“I’m just happy you’re finally coming home sweetheart. Your dad and I miss you.” A pathetic little smile formed on your lips, holding the phone with your shoulder as you finished packing the last things into your suitcase.

“I miss you guys too. See you in a few hours.” You set your phone down and cross the room to grab the book you’d been reading and shove it in your bag.

Christmas break finally arrived to relieve you of the dragging of classes and stuffy dorm. It’d been a while since you’d found time to go home, but you realized this was something you needed.

To get away.

It’d been over a month, and you quickly fell back into your old habits. Class, room, nothing in between. You dropped Psych, avoiding Jin at all costs, although he’d figured he’d done his best to avoid you as well.

The warmth that had taken up space in your previously empty life had fled as quickly as it came. You didn’t talk to anyone, you didn’t sign to anyone, you took on extra classes to finish early. You wanted to be done. You wanted to go home.

Luckily, you had the opportunity to take all online classes your last semester, so you would not be returning to the dorms in the spring. That chapter of your life was over, and even though you were sad to see it go, you knew there was nothing holding you here anymore.

The hassle of it all just wasn’t worth it.

Grabbing the few things you had left, the rest of which you had sold since you wouldn’t need it anymore, you made your way out of the room, locking it for the last time. Before you turned to head down the hallway, you took one last look down the hall to a familiar door.

You figured he’d probably already left for the holiday, since most of the dorms had. Not that it mattered, you wouldn’t speak to him and he wouldn’t speak to you.

Strangers once again.

The once resentment you harbored towards him for cutting you off without explanation was filled with sympathy. You couldn’t expect him to understand and accept you after everything that had happened. You wanted him to live a normal happy life, fall in love with a normal girl that would be good for him.

You couldn’t give him that and you had to accept that. In the end, you were happy with the time you did have together. He’d always be your best friend, no matter how much time and distance separated you.

You both harbored no ill feelings towards each other, it was just something that had to be done, something that was inevitable in your opinion. People like you and people like him just weren’t meant to be.

Grabbing the handle of your suitcase, you make your way down to the lobby to return your key and head to the train station before your train left.

Stepping out of the elevator, you see a familiar figure standing at the front desk, back towards you.

You could tell that brown hair from anywhere though, and you slowed your pace to give him enough time to leave.

Instead, he turns in your direction, a bag in one hand, an envelope in the other.

Your eyes meet, and you have half a mind to just keep walking, you could mail them the key once you were home.

He quickly blocks your path, however, eyes not leaving yours.

It’s awkward and intense and neither of you know what to say, or whether you should say anything at all. After a minute, Jin clears his throat, extending the envelope out to you.

You stare at it, and look back up at him as he shakes it, inviting you to take it.

“I wanted to leave you this before I went home, but since we’re here...” You take it from him, but as you are about to open it, he steps closer and lays his hand over yours.

He stares down at you, his expression soft, like it had been months before when he held you in his arms at night. You had missed that, so, so much.

“I-I just wanted to tell you I’m sorry,” he starts, a red tinge finding solace at the tips of his ears.

“I shouldn’t have left you like I did. I was just, scared. I didn’t know what to think about everything and I thought maybe I was being affected,” he cringes at that, voicing his thoughts of you possibly ‘controlling’ him made him feel like a dumbass, “I know, it was stupid and not fair at all. I just...” he pauses his rant, waiting for any hint of a reaction from you, but you stay silent, waiting for him to finish saying whatever was on his mind.

He takes in a deep breath, “I thought that everything I felt for you might not have been real. I got scared it was all in my head and I didn’t know what to do. But, I realized that everything about me and you was the only sure and real thing in my life. I missed the way you roll your eyes at me when I make dumb jokes, the way your noise crinkles up when your trying to understand something, the way you laugh obnoxiously when I do something stupid,” His hand moves forward to grasp yours as he continues his rant.

“I miss listening to you try to convince me that Spider-Man is the most earnest Avenger even though we both know he’s not,” that earns a crack of a grin despite the tears forming in your eyes. “I miss holding you close at night and hearing our heartbeats mix together in the open air as we fall asleep.”

Jin cups your cheek in his other hand, thumb sliding to wipe away a fallen tear. You lean into his hand, reminiscing in the feeling of his skin on yours.

“I miss you.” He says, his face inching closer to yours, your breaths mixing together between the two of you. You don’t know what to say, but luckily he takes initiative and slowly closes the gap between you.

A warmth envelopes both of you, spreading from your lips and seeping into every fiber of your bodies. The feeling of his lips against yours steals the air from your lungs and heightens every one of your senses. His hands find purchase on the small of your back, your arms curling around his neck to dispel any space between you.

The tension that releases from you is replaced with what you can only describe as pure love.

As you pull apart, Jin rests his forehead against yours, placing another kiss to your lips as you giggle.

“I’m sorry it took so long for me to figure out. I love you.” His smile spreads to yours and you rub the tips of your noses together.

“I love you too,” he leans in for another kiss, but you stop him, a smirk on your lips, “even though you most definitely are a dumb-ass.” He laughs, breathily and pulls you tighter to him.

“I deserve that. I’m your dumb-ass, though.”

You part ways to head home for break with the promise of seeing each other in a few days to spend Christmas together.

When you settled onto the train, you pulled the forgotten envelope from your coat pocket, taking the letter out that resided inside.

As the train began its journey, you read every word of the letter with warmth in your heart.

In detail, was every single thing about you he had fallen in love with.

He’d fallen in love with you; all of you.

And he’d never walk away again.

You’d never be alone again.

The End.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey Guys,

   First story is officially out! Hope I did you all and Mr. Worldwide Handsome justice. This ended up being longer than I originally anticipated, but I think it needed it to really set everything up. Also, if there are any typos or grammatical errors, feel free to let me know, I’m human, I make mistakes. Kicking off 7 Days of Halloween with a cute little Jin-ie love story, what could be better? I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Stay Spooky! More to come!

P.S. Sorry it’s a bit late, Tumblr is on the fritz and wouldn’t let me post it.

-Moonie🌙

#bts #bts fluff #bts angst #bts x reader #bts x y/n #supernatural bts #7 days of halloween #7 days of bts #bts short story #spooky bts #kim seokjin #seokjin x reader #jin x reader #seokjin x y/n #siren!reader #bts jin #bts seokjin #jin fluff #seokjin fluff #jin angst #seokjin angst

[doctor-who-hears-a-horton]

Above Ground (Ten x Rose)

Rating: Teen

Summary: On Gallifrey, the humans who were born there are subjected to live below the surface in an underground society, separated from the Gallifreyans. School teacher Rose Tyler aims to change things, even if it costs her her own life.Prince Theta of Gallifrey has always thought there was more to the humans than meets the eye… And Rose Tyler proves him right.

Chapter 3/?

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 

Read it on AO3 here!

Being led into town by the crown prince didn’t garner as much attention as Rose expected that it would.  He nodded to a few shopkeepers, but they seemed to be more interested in Rose than him.

“Ah…” he rubbed his hand over the back of his neck and looked at her apologetically, “We should probably get you something to wear so you blend in a little more.  The grey… it’s not doing us any favors.”

Rose looked down at her clothes. “But I don’t have anything else. And I don’t have any money.”

He looked at her a bit like she was stupid, and then pointed at himself. “Crown prince.”

“Oh, shut up.”

He took that as a ‘yes’ and grinned widely at her, leading her to a shop that was partially down an alley.  Rose recoiled at first, but he didn’t seem nervous and showed no signs of betraying her so far, so she reluctantly followed him in.

It was a cute little place, with dark mahogany furniture and red accents.  There were only one or two other people in the store, but the clothes themselves were also impressive to look at, and she instantly knew that even if she lived above ground, what was sold here would never be anything that she was able to afford.  She was also starting to wonder if it was possible to overload from just looking at colors for too long.

“Oi!  What brings your sorry arse into my shop, your highness?” A redheaded woman called out from behind the counter, hands on her hips as she scowled at Theta.  Rose balked. Was she allowed to talk to the Prince of Gallifrey like that? “Donna!  I’ve got a new friend for you to meet.  Want to quit hiding behind the counter?”

“I’m not hiding, I’m doing my job.  Something I pray to the gods you’ll eventually be decent at.”

He had the good sense to look a little wounded at her comment.  “Now, come on, I’m just trying to give you business.”

The woman sighed, and did come out from behind the counter to approach him. “Well, sweetheart, if you are his friend, you’d better watch out.  This one’s got a huge nose for trouble.” She extended her hand. “Donna Noble, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Rose Tyler.”  

They shook hands and Rose was left having to bite back more and more questions.  Was this woman Gallifreyan? Was she a Time Lady?  Rose had never heard of the Gallifreyans speaking casually to one another, and here a shop lady was speaking casually to the prince?  She wasn’t sure the books they were forced to read did justice to the people here at all.

“I can see why his highness brought you in here, Rose, your clothes are a little… Drab. If you don’t mind me saying.”

Rose looked down at herself again. “No, I don’t mind, it’s… True.”

Donna set about picking out a new set of clothes for Rose then, and Rose, who had absolutely no input to speak of since she’d never seen such colorful clothing before, simply sat down on an ottoman and watched the woman work.  She jerked in surprise when Theta plopped down next to her.

“I’ve known Donna forever,” he confided, leaning towards her a little bit. “Childhood friends, us! They were going to matchmake us but we both put up such a fuss that the Council decided it wasn’t worth it.”

Rose laughed at that. “So you don’t get your own choice?”

“Mm… I do, in a way. I have a voice, but ultimately if there’s someone Rassilon likes that he wants to rule with me, then that’s who I have to marry.”  He extended his legs, scuffing his heels along the floor. “What about you?  Is there a Mr. Rose Tyler back home?”  He was being a little too casual about asking, and Rose wasn’t necessarily sure what that meant.

“Well.  Um.  No.” 

“That’s it?  No, really, somebody must be chasing after you.”

Her cheeks colored pink and she looked away from him. “Well, not to my knowledge. There’s not a lot of time to date where… Where I’m from,” she covered up, just in case anyone was listening to them.  She could only assume that since he hadn’t told Donna where she was from, Theta thought it safer to keep her identity a secret for now.  That was fine by her.

“I’m a teacher,” she continued, “So by the time I get out of school I want to go right home.”

He hummed.  “I suppose that’s fair.  Still,” he lifted a shoulder, “Must be lonely.”

She turned where she sat to face him head-on.  “Are you speaking from experience?”

Dark eyes settled on her, and for a moment she lost her breath at the sadness in them.  “You have no idea.”

Before Rose could ask anything else, Donna swept back over. She was holding a simple red rob that cinched at the waist with a golden belt.  It looked like it would fit loosely everywhere except the waist, and it had charming golden details around the hem of the skirt and the sleeves. 

“Oh… Oh, that’s beautiful,” she said, reaching out to touch the fabric but then wrenching her hand back. 

“No, go on, try it,” Theta nudged her shoulder.  “It’s for you.”

Rose blinked.  She still wasn’t sure she quite believed that Theta was going to buy her beautiful, expensive clothes just so she could fit in, but to wear something so extravagant… She at least wanted to try it on, even if the dream would be ripped from her.

“Come on, then, there’s a room back here where you can change.  We’ll have to get you out of those old things no matter what.” Donna smiled at her and helped her up off the ottoman.  Without meaning to, Rose grinned back.  

Donna led Rose to the back of the store. “I’ll just wait here while you try it on.”

Rose nodded and went through the curtain into the rather large dressing room.  She found herself staring at her reflection in the mirror.  She looked scared and out of place with the finery around her, and taking the opportunity to look at her clothes, she could see why it would be something that would stand out.  Her plain grey dress may be the standard fare underground, but here?  There would be no mistaking her for a Gallifreyan.  

She started to undress and heard Donna ask her a question from outside. “How’d you end up with Theta, anyways?”

She didn’t call him ‘Prince’ at all, Rose noticed.  “We… Bumped into each other, when I first arrived here,” She said, wincing before reminding herself that that’s not a total lie.  “He said he’d show me around, since I’m visiting and don’t know anything around here well.”

Donna snorted. “Well, much as I hate to admit it, you ran into the perfect person.  Not only can that man get you into every exclusive place on the map, he’s also got the bug for travel, so he knows the entirety of this place inside out.”

“Yeah, I got the idea that he doesn’t want to be the prince,” Rose admitted, settling the crimson garment over her shoulders before fumbling along with the belt.

Donna sighed quietly. “No, no he doesn’t.  But he’ll still be a great leader.  That big fool can’t do anything without doing it full out.  It’s a blessing and a curse, I think.  That’s probably why he was so eager to help you. Well, that, and you’re a beautiful young woman.  Gallifrey has plenty of those and none of them have interested him so far.”

Rose’s hands faltered at Donna’s words. “That’s- that doesn’t mean anything at all!  He’s just helping me out, really.”

“For now. Don’t blame me if he ends up falling in love with you, he already seems very interested in you.”

Rose felt her cheeks burn.  It wouldn’t do her any good to let Donna’s words get to her. Theta seemed ‘interested’ in her because she offered helpful and interesting information about a new place, and according to Donna and Theta himself, new places were very much his favorite thing.  That didn’t mean anything!  She forced herself to laugh before the silence became palpable.

“I really doubt it. That’s kind of you to say, though.”

She looked at herself in the mirror, marvelling at how tiny her waist appeared with the billowing fabric both over and under the belt. She smiled a little.  Red looked good on her, complimenting her pale skin and the gold looking almost as if it had been brought out from her eyes.

Red was pretty.

She’d never really known that before.

She pulled back the curtain and looked at Donna. “Will I do?”

“Oh, will you, those robes were made for you!” Donna clapped her hands. “Let me see if I can swindle that dusty prince out of a little more credits to get you some accessories.”

They headed back across the store and Rose pretended not to notice that Theta’s jaw loosened a little bit when he saw them. He got to his feet, still staring.

“Rose.  You look-”

“Like she could use a headpiece, your highness,” Donna offered sweetly.

Theta’s attention snapped back to Donna and he laughed out loud.  “Well, alright. I suppose since you’re taking the time out of your clearly busy day, I can line your pockets some more.” “What else am I supposed to do with your friendship, if not exploit it?” Donna teased.

Eventually, Rose settled on a pretty gold chain that rested atop her head, with a tiny, cloudy gem hanging down between her brows.  Donna secured it in place and smiled at her own work.  “Yep.  I definitely would’ve remembered seeing you around here before.  You’re beautiful.”

Rose noticed that Theta didn’t say anything, but then again, she wasn’t sure she wanted him to.  He took what appeared to be just a stick (what Rose assumed held credits) and passed it over to Donna.

“I’ll pay you back someday,” she said earnestly, grabbing his arm.

He looked down at her, startled.  “Nah, don’t do that! Think of this as your welcome gift!  Erm, welcome to Gallifrey, that is.”

She let go of him and nodded a little, still feeling unsure.  Her stomach growled and she placed a hand over it, blushing.

Theta laughed. “I did promise I would get you something to eat, too.  Well, in the case you’re ever in this area again, you can always come and see Donna.  She’s just about adopted you, I think.”

Rose smiled a little, but she wasn’t sure what to think of that concept.  ‘Should she ever return’.  Should she ever return because soon she’d be escorted back through here to be sent back down below?  Or because… She was a citizen?  She shook her head, dismissing that thought immediately.  That was an impossibility, and she’d do well to remember that.

Donna returned and gave Theta his credit stick back. “Well. Don’t be strangers. You know where I am.”

“Never.  Thank you, Donna.” Theta shot her a charming smile that just made her roll her eyes.

“Yeah, thank you so much,” Rose said, hoping her voice sounded as genuine as she felt. 

Donna smiled at her, eyes soft.  “Of course, dear.”

They left then, and Theta led her back up the alley and back into the main roads. “Ah, now that people will quit staring at you, we should find something to eat.”

Rose was having trouble keeping herself focused.  There were so many questions she had, and she wasn’t sure where to start.  The people bustling around her were staring at her less, but she was admittedly still staring quite openly at them.  Her clothes were beautiful, but many other peoples’ were gaudy in comparison, and she was glad that Donna had picked something that was so tame.  She grabbed Theta’s arm, trying to keep up with his long strides and not lose him in the crowd, completely missing the surprised look he was giving her. 

She looked around as they walked along and was suddenly hit with the smell of something meaty and savory, her mouth watering.  “Do you smell that?”

“Yeah.”

“I want whatever that is.”

Theta laughed, guiding her towards the stall where the smell was originating from.  “Those are meat pies, but let me tell you, they’re the best in the city.  You’ve got a good nose on you, Rose Tyler.”

She decided that if the worst happened from today, whatever happened right now, the food she ate and the clothes she wore���

She deserved to enjoy it.

#ten x rose #tenrose #tenth doctor #rose tyler #tenpetals #allonswolf #ray lu writes fic #raylu writes fic #ray lu tenxrose #above ground ray lu #doctor who #doctor who fanfic

[amusedyan]

Just Like A Fairy Tale

Okay, so on my other account @elandvary, I added a thing to a concept submitted to @yandere-love-love-love about yandere Tamaki literally organizing a darling for yandere Mirio because he loves him, and I thought…fuck I want to make this an actual thing, so here we are.

Special thanks to @yandere-love-love-love for being awesome and letting people submit shit and also steal the crops that she tends for us. Bless you. And shout out, once more to Mod Kleos for being there for me to rant or ramble to, and being willing to figuratively dig into the archives for me.

With that said this is a bit of an odd piece because it’s got yandere Tamaki Amajiki as the main focus, but the main pairing is yandere Mirio and the reader, even though Mirio’s...love doesn’t come off quite as obsessive as Tamaki’s does, but you can see it peeking through the curtain if you look.

It’s your wedding day today.

You’d woken up late, for you, and had been preparing for hours. Outside your window you could see the church flooded with people and color. By now your husband-to-be would be there, waiting for you, perhaps making last minute adjustments with his adviser for your trip to the neighboring kingdoms.

It was perfect. Everything was perfect.

You were about to be married, to royalty no less! One day you were a slave and a nobody, and the next...the next you were having a whirlwind romance with a man straight from a story. 

Your story...

You smiled to yourself.

A few months ago you were no one, you were beaten down- often literally- broken and dismissed. You were a shadow.

You were out looking for mushrooms one morning, the earthy, dirty smell in your nose- you had a million thoughts swirling in your head, and you wondered in an abstract way if those thoughts might lift you and fly you far away from your stepmother and your stepsisters.

And then he’d appeared.

Or, well, his horse had.

Mirio had appeared on his horse and he’d smiled at you, and it was like looking at the sun it was so brilliant.

You hadn’t recognized him of course, why would you? Grandfather might have once had a title and money but that had been lost and gambled away respectively by now- court was just one more story your mother had spoken of once, a long, long time ago.

He’d climbed down and you’d asked if he was lost.

“No, the only thing lost is the deer I was hunting. Has it come through?” He asked curiously, and you’d shaken your head. He’d sighed but didn’t look too disappointed.

Somehow nearly an hour passed before you heard the telltale screeching from your Stepmother and you’d had to excuse yourself. Mirio had looked alarmed and begged you not to leave, “I’ve duties to my family, excuse me,” you declared, arming yourself with the basket of morels and hurrying away.

It hadn’t occurred to you until later that you’d neglected to give the handsome stranger your name.

Your stepmother was endlessly cruel that day for your tardiness, but the stranger plagued your thoughts. How could he not? You were lonely, you were young, and you dreamed of adventure! A handsome stranger sweeping you off your feet would be a dream come true!

While you worked, it was easy to keep your head down and think your own thoughts and make yourself small. You were no more than a wisp of smoke until someone needed you for something. You had endless time to make up a life with this man in your head.

Just when you’d begun to let go of this particular dream some days later, a royal messenger had delivered the announcement that the Prince was holding a festival every night for three nights in the coming week. All the nobility, no matter how fallen, the messenger had sneered, were invited to come.

And so began the great Husband Race- for all of that week you were on your feet and had no rest, running back and forth and sideways to fetch this and fix that and mend this tear and tighten that corset. Your stepsisters fasted for the majority of the week to fit into the lovely gowns ordered on credit from the village dressmaker- to be paid for with the last of your mother’s jewelry, no doubt.

By night you worked by moonlight to mend something fashionable belonging to your parents, resizing and refitting and mending to fit you.

The first night of the festival your stepmother had declined letting you attend and instead dismissed you with a warning to have tea and warm baths ready for them in the morning when they returned. You’d been exhausted and hungry and so empty. 

You felt so alone, sitting on the front steps all alone with your dreams crushed beneath careless carriage wheels. You’d cried, long and hard.

And then there was a shining light, and figure so bright you couldn’t look at it had appeared. It called itself a spirit of kindness and offered her a boon; the chance to go to the festival every night, a way there and a way home, even an outfit! And oh how wonderful!

“But why would you give me this?” You’d asked in awe at the new clothes and the glass shoes and the new carriage awaiting.

The figure had flickered, “your kindness deserves a reward,” it had proclaimed, and then sent her away with the final warning, “when the clock strikes 4 you must be at home. You will need time to prepare for your family’s return,” it reminded, and sent you off.

The kind spirit had sent you to your destiny.

The prince found you at once and his face had split into a grin. You’d returned it, at the same time sinking into a polite bow.

“Your highness,” you’d murmured, even as your heart pounded.

“Rise. Come dance with me!” He’d declared, and that dance had been so beautiful. 

You talked the whole night, and when you didn’t talk to spent it wrapped in his arms, warm and strong.

“I’d hoped you would be here,” he admitted towards the end of the evening. You’d been eyeing the clock to keep an eye on when to leave, but his words made your stomach twist in knots.

“You did?”

“I wanted to see you, and I thought inviting everyone...” You’d raised an eyebrow.

“And if I had been a commoner?”

“Then I would have thrown a larger party for everyone in the kingdom.” He’d promised, and his seriousness had made you laugh.

It was getting late, you needed to leave.

“Will you get me some punch please?” You asked, for lack of a better exit. Mirio had gone off and you’d fled, something you were ashamed of now.

You made it home in time though, and you were on cloud nine as you prepared for your family. You made tea and little sandwiches and got their nightdresses ready and even managed to get a few hours of sleep before they returned.

“A little slut hung off the prince all night,” one of your stepsisters complained.

“Poor thing couldn’t get away.” You’d hummed but you didn’t give anything away. It delighted you, this little secret you had.

You all slept for most of the morning, but you got up before the rest to prepare for the coming night.

And once they were gone your carriage and your clothes and your shoes appeared, and off to the festival you’d gone.

The lights and the crowds and the music were just as gorgeous and dreamlike as the night before, and you quickly found yourself swarmed with dance partners. You danced with them until a strong hand gripped your elbow and declared “cutting in!” in a familiar voice.

“Prince Mirio!” You declared, going red.

“Wonderful to see you again!” But his smile was a little less happy now.

Of course he was angry, you realized. You’d sent him off and gone without a word- it was unspeakably rude and honestly you wondered that he was still bothering to talk to you.

The Prince led you away to the balcony from the night before and demanded an explanation. When you could offer only apologies it only seemed to irritate him. But he didn’t leave, if anything it only seemed to attach him to you that much more firmly.

All through the night he remained at your side, and nothing could dissuade him.

When it finally came time for you to leave, you had no choice but to run, ignoring his calls for you to halt. No guards chased you though, so you counted yourself lucky.

Home was a relief that night, and you soaked your aching feet for a bit before your stepfamily returned with more stories of the harlot hogging the prince.

The third and final night your prince was prepared. He said nothing of your hasty exit the night before, but there was a determination in his eye that would have made most women swoon with it’s intensity. Instead you bowed and asked him for a dance.

He’d let you get away with so much already. 

For some reason he seemed to delight in the idea, and he didn’t hesitate to sweep you off your feet, just like he had for the last two nights.

When it came time to leave you excused yourself again, and he gave chase. But on the steps of the palace tar had been spread that nearly tripped you and sent you sprawling. You caught your balance in time, though, although the tar claimed one of your glass shoes. 

“Please wait!” Mirio called behind you, but you didn’t stop and once you were in your carriage there was no stopping you.

If you’d thought things would settle after the festival, you were badly mistaken. By the next afternoon word spread that the Prince, your prince, was looking for you, trying to use the glass shoe to find you.

It was flattering, and the image of him tearing apart the kingdom for you...well it made your heart flutter.

But things don’t go well for you, and good luck doesn’t last. Your stepmother found your glass shoe. She was furious and locked you away in the closet so the prince wouldn’t find you.

But he did.

You don’t know what happened, except you heard voices, and then suddenly shouting, after a long time in the dark. Then the door opened and Mirio was there to save you.

He didn’t ask about your family. He didn’t have to. The state of the house, where he found you, well, that all said enough, didn’t it? He locked them away though, far away where they’d never hurt you again.

Mirio saved you- he locked away your abusers and brought you back to the castle- not as a servant, or even a whore, but as a spouse! He wanted to marry you.

And while yesterday it had seemed so wonderful, and today was even a dream come true, it was also very, very scary.

You loved Mirio, at least, you thought you did. And you were positive that he loved you. But shouldn’t you both wait? Was a month really enough time to decide to wed?

Those fears and thousand more was catching you and closing your throat, and your eyes burned with tears.

There was a soft knock on the door to your dressing room before long, and you gathered yourself enough to call out “come in.” There was a momentary pause before it opened, revealing your fiance’s dark haired companion.

There were whispers all among the servants about the creature called Amajiki. Mirio himself called him Tamaki and showed him now shortage of affection and kindness, and while he had always been quiet, Tamaki- as Mirio had insisted you call him- had never been anything less than polite.

He was a fae, you knew that much; his pointed ears and teeth and slitted eyes gave him away, not to mention his monstrous appetite. He considered himself close to Mirio, and Mirio had told you that they’d met as children. You’d wondered how old Tamaki really was, more than once.

His calm presence rattled you for some reason and you found yourself crying again.

“What is it?” He asked quietly, but it was loud in the stillness of the boidoir.

“Oh Tamaki, I just...well...it occurred to me how...perfect all of this has been, like something out of a book. And it’s a little overwhelming, you know? I’m about to be married, but maybe...maybe we’ve moved too fast.” You mused, wiping at your eyes again.

Tamaki was quiet for a moment before he leaned against your vanity and crossed his arms. He was facing the window, didn’t look at you, but at the church instead.

“Would you like to hear a story?” 

And it was such an odd question, you found yourself startled. But you needed a distraction and you had some time, so you nodded.

“Once upon a time there was a fae child that was unwanted,” he began. “He wasn’t as beautiful as his brothers and sisters, or as clever, or as powerful. And the fae can’t abide by anything less than perfect among their own species, and so they cast him out. Didn’t even bother exchanging him, just...threw him away.

“The child was alone and scared and didn’t know anything about humans beyond what all fae children know- that they are cruel and stupid and ugly and less, and so he spent months avoiding them. But the winter came and the child was cold and soon began to starve. He went to sleep crouched under a log one night and woke up to blue eyes staring at him.” Tamaki had a small smile on his face now, and you realized that, no matter what he might think of himself, the fae was beautiful when he smiled.

“The little human prince of the kingdom found him and carried him to the castle, and demanded of his mother and father that the fae boy be cared for. The king and the queen were weak to their only son’s wants and gave in, and so the fae child was raised as a companion to the young prince.

“And the fae do not forget their debt.

“The prince grew up and the fae grew with him. When one day, several years later, the King and the Queen began to talk of marriage the prince was distressed, ‘I want to marry for love, Mother, Father,’ he declared,” and you could so clearly imagine a young Mirio swearing this to the austere Queen and King. You couldn’t help but smile a bit.

“The fae wanted to help. You see, he knew, more than anyone, about the prince, and what he wanted. The prince was shining as the sun, and had so much love to give; to force him into a marriage would hurt the prince, and the fae couldn’t have that.” A dark cloud raked over Tamaki’s face, fierce and brief, before he shook it off like it was nothing. “He spoke to the King and Queen and told them, in no short words, that the Prince would marry and he would marry well and marry for love if they left the matter up to him. And so a deal was struck.

“By night the fae scoured the kingdom for a suitable partner- they had to be nobility, and of a nature that the Prince would get along with, and more than that they wouldn’t interfere or find fault with the Fae at the Prince’s side. You can imagine what a chore that was.” His tone was nearly warm now, and although you were becoming alarmed at the direction of the story, you smiled. 

“He got lucky,” Tamaki breathed, closing his eyes. “One evening he stumbled upon a dilapidated chateau, where a man, a woman and their young child lived. They were noble, but their title was only a title, with no money to back it up. The man lived as an artist and they were very poor, but very much in love. It was a home filled with joy and happiness, and the fae knew, with absolute certainty, that this was the child that would grow into the Prince’s spouse.” A chill settled in your bones, dread growing like a fungus. “The wife was kind to the waif that appeared at their doorstep and gave him bread and milk and a night to rest, and in the morning the little vagabond was a beautiful fae of shining gold who offered the wife a reward for her generosity: the guaranteed happiness of her only child. The woman was kind and good and loved the child and agreed. And another deal was struck.”

You knew where this was going.

You felt sick.

“It was an easy thing to make the wife ill. Humans are so...hopeless. The slightest sign of something wrong and they fear the worst. And when no medicine cures the illness, well,” Tamaki shrugged lazily.

He had killed your mother.

“Directing the widower to his new wife was another trick. A few dreams, a few illusions, some similarities to his dead wife, and two daughters the child’s age? It would have been a perfect marriage!”

“But it wasn’t,” you whispered, gripping your knees.

“No.” Tamaki agreed with a smile.

You know where the story picks up for a bit.

“Soon after the marriage the child’s father got sick as well,” you continued, when he made no move to stop you. “The doctors feared contagion, but the child knew it to be a broken heart. No sooner was he in the ground then the child’s hardships began.

“The family that should have cared for the child instead abused them, worked them like a slave and beat them like a dog. They were lonely and afraid and wanted to escape.”

“And then one day,” Tamaki picked up, “the fae advised the Prince to go for a hunt in the southern wood.”

Your eyes widened.

“Was everything...?”

“And the prince met the abused noble and fell desperately in love,” he interrupted without remorse. “But the object of his affections had to leave before he could get their name. So the Prince decided to throw a festival,  three days long, for the nobility, in the hopes that his darling would appear.

“But on the first night, after an hour, the Prince became frantic. Where were they? Why haven’t they come? They were supposed to come! And so the fae stole off to the chateau and found the Darling sitting on the steps, crying like a child. The Fae disguised himself again and gave the Darling the means and the gifts to attend the festival as an equal and sent them off.

“For 2 nights he watched as the Darling and the Prince circled each other. But on the 3rd morning the Prince asked how he might find his darling or keep them from running away. The Fae advised him to paint tar on the steps to try and slow them down.

“But it didn’t work, not exactly. Instead it took the glass shoe that the fae had given them. But the Prince was hopeful- how many could possibly fit in the shoe? And so he sent out a decree that all must try the shoe on.” Tamaki laughed a little bit, “no one but the darling could have worn the shoes. They were very particular magick.”

“For the next several days they searched all together, until even the Prince began losing hope. But the final house, that fated chateau, approached. There were, at first glance, two women of age to fit the shoe, but neither did. And the stepmother claimed no one else to be in the house.”

“But you knew better.”

“I did. I claimed to hear crying and led Mirio to you so you could be saved. I lifted you from the mud of your old life and brought you to this shining new one. All for him.” That calm, reasonable if aloof tone dropped, and finally the fae turned his gaze on you.

“You call this a story? Well it is. But it isn’t yours. It’s his. And you will give him his happy ending or you will be just a footnote in that story, do you understand?”

You nodded, your fear a physical knot in your throat.

But then the monster was gone and the mask was replaced.

“Now get dressed. You don’t want to be late for the wedding.”

#boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha #mha #fanfiction #yandere fanfiction #yandere boku no hero academia #yandere my hero academia #yandere bnha #yandere mha #yandere tamaki amajiki #yandere suneater #yandere mirio #yandere lemillion #yandere reader

[cheeseeatingtrashmonster]

Be My Lois Lane (Marichat May) Chapter 3: Kittens

@marichatmay I don’t know if you’re still reblogging these now that it’s June, but I’ll tag you this time and see what happens :)

Ao3

"Look! Look, Alya! I may faint. Gorgeous."

Alya looked up from her phone to the runway. "The girl or the clothes?"

Marinette couldn't tear her eyes from the model. "I meant the clothes, but both."

The Gabriel fashion show was exactly the distraction Marinette had needed after her first day as a Junior Reporter. It wasn't even time for lunch yet when Chloe had heard through the grapevine that she had "taken" Marinette's job. Marinette had been sorting through the records of past articles on Chat Noir when Chloe stopped to talk to (more like corner) an intern about how some other person almost got her job and how narrowly the paper had avoided disaster by hiring her. She just "happened" to talk to the intern loudly, and three feet from Marinette's desk. The day had gone downhill from there.

"You wanna go backstage after?" Alya asked, returning to texting.

"Nino can swing that?"

Nino had gotten Alya two tickets to the fashion show to celebrate Marinette's promotion. He hadn't told Alya how he had gotten the tickets, but he did mention that they weren't a job perk.

"Apparently. He says there's a surprise."

Marinette groaned and leaned her head on Alya's shoulder. "No more surprises. Today and last night were enough surprises. No more, just for a little while?"

Alya gave her a quick side hug, then went back to texting. "I'll see if I can get it out of him for you."

Marinette meant to thank her. However, she seemed to have lost her voice. It had been stolen away by the sight on the runway. All she could do was grip Alya's arm and try to catch her breath.

"What?" Alya asked, still not looking up.

"Him."

Marinette was vaguely aware of Alya teasing her, but she didn't care. The single most attractive person she had ever seen was stopping at the end of the runway and smirking at her. With a tip of his hat- and was that a wink?- he turned and walked back up the runway, giving her a view of just how well the back of his black, shimmery suit fit him.

"Starstruck." Alya's singsong teasing finally made its way into her brain. "That was Adrien Agreste, wasn't it?"

"This is his second appearance since going to Japan for university," Marinette said.

Alya snorted. "Good to know your celebrity crush is alive and well."

"Can you blame me?" Marinette asked. "Oooh, look at the way this jacket drapes on her shoulders!"

"Don't change the- Oh, you're right. I want one like that."

"Thank you, Nino!" Marinette hugged him and, being Marinette, almost knocked them both over.

"Ready for your second surprise?" Nino asked, setting Marinette on her feet.

"Is it a good surprise like the fashion show? Or a bad surprise like you getting a picture of me with that stupid super-cat and giving it to the paper?" She crossed her arms and pursed her lips as he opened a door for her and Alya.

"Marinette, bro, I can't apologize enough. The fashion show was a 'yay promotion' present. This is a 'sorry I sold a picture of you and Chat Noir before figuring out that you were the one in the picture but in my defense, you can only see a little of your face but I'm still sorry anyway please don't me be mad at me' present."

Marinette looked around the room. It was a private dressing room for a model, with a person behind the curtain tossing clothes onto the couch against the wall. Whose dressing room was this? Was the surprise that she was getting to meet one of the models? She looked closer at the clothes. Was... was this Adrien Agreste's dressing room?

"Alya was saying how you've been feeling a little lonely lately, so I figured I'd introduce you to-"

Adrien stepped out from behind the changing curtain in jeans and a plain black t-shirt, looking even better in casual, everyday clothes than the runway pieces.

And then a squirmy, sleepy mass of fluff was shoved in her face.

"-these kittens!" Nino finished.

"Oooh..." Marinette breathed, holding out her hands for the kitten. His fur was pure black, with a little pink nose and big brown eyes. He cuddled into Marinette's chest and began purring the moment she pulled him close.

"These are your friends?" Adrien asked.

"Yeah, hey bro!" Nino walked over to slap Adrien on the back. "This is my girlfriend, Alya, and my childhood bestie, aka Alya's college bestie, Marinette. Lady-bros, meet Adrien Agreste. He’s the one who got me the tickets for you."

"Any friend of Nino's is a friend of mine," Adrien said, shaking both girl's hands. "I hear there's a promotion to celebrate?"

"Ugh, don't remind me," Marinette said, bowing her head to drop a kiss on the kitten's ear.

"She got pushed out of the job she wanted," Nino explained, picking up a second kitten from the small, towel-lined bin. "Our fashionista is gonna be reporting on our local hero cat-boy. That part's my fault, I told you about that."

Adrien turned to Marinette, eyes widening. "You're the rescued-by-Chat Noir girl?"

She narrowed her eyes. "Let me tell you about how that cat ruined my life."

Adrien watched Alya, Marinette, and Marinette's new kitten, Shadow, head to Alya's car an hour later.

"So that's Marinette?" Adrien said to Nino.

"That's Marinette!" They gathered their things, heading out for the celebratory drink that Adrien had promised Nino for his picture in the paper.

"She really doesn't like Chat Noir," he said.

"Nah, she's just mad that she has to report on him."

"She's also really into fashion," Adrien said. Marinette had had three topics: Chat Noir, her new kitten, and fashion.

"Yeah, she's got her finger on the pulse of the city's... fashion... stuff. That's why she woulda been perfect in the junior reporter position for that department."

The wheels in Adrien's head started turning. Before he could talk himself out of it, he asked, "Could you give me her phone number? I've been looking for someone- a designer. Marinette knows fashion and has investigative journalism skills, so I figured-"

"Why can't you ask around work?" Nino asked. He was pulling out his phone and opening his contacts as he spoke though.

"I don't want word getting back to my father. If he thinks I'm looking to leave the company-"

"Say no more."

Adrien's phone pinged with a text, and he had Marinette's number saved in his phone a moment later. One step closer...

They settled in at a bar before Nino let his curiosity get the better of him.

"So, who is this person you're looking for?"

Who indeed?

"Well... there was this girl..."

Six Months Ago

"Sorry, but this is probably smaller than you're used to," the nervous designer, Jakob, said, guiding Adrien to a small, curtained dressing area.

"This is more than enough room," Adrien said, looking over the rack of clothes. "And I'm excited to work with you."

The fashion show was a small one for new designers and students finishing fashion school to get the attention of bigger name labels. Adrien and a few other models had volunteered to work with the designers to help their labels find new hires.

Someone sneezed in the dressing area to the right of Adrien's.

"Bless you," Adrien said automatically.

"Thank you," A raspy voice replied. "I've been working so hard to prepare for this show, the second my work was set, this cold hit."

"That's unfortunate," Adrien said. Jakob started handing him pieces of clothing and helping him adjust the clothing for the right fit.

"I'm happy to be here, though," the woman in the other area said. "What about you? Have you been in fashion long?"

"All my life," Adrien said. "My name's Adrien Agreste."

The woman cleared her throat. "Oh. Um. Wow. Yeah, you have been in fashion your whole life, huh?"

The model working with her snorted. "Don't let Agreste fool you, he's a dork."

"Oh, hey, Chelsea!" Adrien called, recognizing the model's voice.

"This your first show since you got back last year?" Chelsea asked.

"Yeah, I figured I'd start with people who were actually happy to see me," he joked.

Someone closer to the stage yelled something barely comprehensible, and the flurry of activity picked up. Designers made their final adjustment and the first few models headed to get in order for the catwalk.

"What's your name, Miss Designer?" Adrien asked before Jakob could pull him out of the dressing area.

"Ladybug."

Adrien stopped dead. "Excuse me?"

Chelsea giggled. "Ladybug here won't tell anyone her name. We've all been pestering her, asking for it, but that's her thing, not sharing her real name."

"My brand is my identity," Ladybug said.

"Adrien, you need to get in line!" Jakob said.

"I'm gonna ask about that in a minute," Adrien said.

Between turns on the catwalk, Adrien and Ladybug got to know each other, as much as Ladybug would let him know her. She had one semester left of school, she had an online boutique for her brand, she had always felt drawn to Ladybugs, and yes, she had had a celebrity crush on him as a teenager. Whenever Jakob wasn't in the dressing room with him, Adrien was giving Plagg significant looks from where he had nested in his messenger bag.

Adrien was working his way up to asking Ladybug to get a drink that night when he heard her gasp.

“Ladybug? You okay? Stick yourself with another pin?”

“It’s- it’s my mom,” she said. “She slipped on the ice on the sidewalk and hit her head. She’s in the hospital.”

“What do you need, hon?” Chelsea asked.

“I need, um…” Adrien could hear the tears in her voice, even with the cold she had. “I need to go to her.”

“But the show! You’re doing so great!” Jakob said.

“We can take care of it,” Chelsea said. “Jakob, Adrien, and I can get your last two outfits on me and I’ll speak to the labels on your behalf, okay?”

“Absolutely,” Adrien said.

“Yeah, we’ve got this, go,” Jakob said.

Ladybug sniffled. “Are you sure? You’ll have to do two models at once-”

“LB, you got me through sophomore year in one piece,” Jakob said. “The least I can do is this.”

“And then she was gone,” Adrien said. “I never saw her face, and I didn’t get her name or number or anything.”

“Dude. That’s some fairy tale stuff there,” Nino said. “Chelsea didn’t have her contact info?”

“She didn’t,” Adrien said with a sigh. “And while I trust her not to let word get around, I don’t trust anyone else not to let my father know I’m looking for another designer.”

“Well, if anyone can find her, it’s Marinette,” Nino said.

“I can hope,” Adrien said. He rested his hand on the pocket of his blazer where Plagg was napping.

I can hope I’ll find my Ladybug again.

And maybe… maybe Chat Noir could use this phone number to find out more about the woman assigned to be his personal journalist. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but no one said anything about cats and a little bit of teasing.

#marichatmay2019 #miraculous ladybug #marichat #chat noir #adrien agreste #marinette dupain-cheng #marichat may #superhero/reporter au #Be My Lois Lane #my writing #events

[psychobhyun]

P Y S C H O

Foreword: You dig deeply into me, like the thorn of a red flower stuck in me; filled with poison. Even I can’t control myself. I put a bitter smile over my expressionless face. I’m a psycho. 

Warnings: stalker!au, violence, mentions of death, possessive behavior, personality disorder

Genre: smut

Endlessly it’s trying to destroy me... 

just how far will I fall?

To Baekhyun, you were his light at the end of the tunnel. You came to him when his life was at the lowest and he has developed an intense liking to you. He would be in the corner of the club watching you in case some man would take advantage of you, he would be in the library whenever you studied for mid-terms, he would follow you home, keeping a safe between so you wouldn’t notice him trailing behind you.

To you, Baekhyun is a classmate. You shared one or two classes together, but you only knew him because you had a group presentation coming up about psychological disorders for a class. Since the class mostly consisted of girls, Baekhyun was well liked. Baekhyun is really charming and knows his way with words. You’re surprised he’s still single. 

A notification shows on your screen and it’s your best friend, Sehun. The text says he’s going to pick you up at 6 p.m. You reply with a simple okay and a heart emoji and focus on the lecture again. It’s kind of hard though. You feel like you’re getting stared at for some reason. You don’t know if you’re just paranoid or if it’s really happening but it’s been bothering you for some time. 

But then Sehun bailed at you because he suddenly had a meeting with an organizational group he joined in university. You shrug and went to the bus stop to get a ride home but a black car pulls up just in front of you. The glass window rolls down and it’s Baekhyun. “Hey. Want a ride?” 

You really didn’t know Baekhyun but he seems nice. He probably does this to every other girl in the campus so you decided to not think too much into it. He turns on the radio as soon as you entered the car and he sings to the music. “You have a really nice voice,” you complimented him. He smiles. “Thanks, beautiful.”

Is he flirting with me? You thought. You look to the side and notice that you’ve arrived at your neighborhood. You’ve never told him your address before. “Hey, my apartment is that way!” You point at the building you live in and Baekhyun stops right in front of it. You wave goodbye at him and enter your apartment. You didn’t even realize Baekhyun just parked across of you and stayed there until it’s almost midnight. 

You dig deeply into me

like the thorn of a red flower stuck in me;

Filled with poison

Baekhyun was absent the day before your important presentation and your group mates showed concern about his condition. When you told them that you’d bring him soup in case he stayed in because of sickness, everyone agreed but since it was so sudden, they couldn’t go with you. 

When you got his address through one of his friends, you went there alone with a boiling pot of hot soup you made at home. He lives alone and his apartment was only 15 minutes away from yours. You ring his doorbell and when he opens it, you see a shirtless Baekhyun with water dripping from his hair. 

“I’m sorry I came unannounced, I brought soup in case you were sick,” you explained. Baekhyun chuckles and lets you inside. His apartment isn’t that big but it’s very clean and polished. “Your apartment is nice,” you said, trying to start a conversation. “It’s lonely here, though.” 

You ignore his reply because you knew he was enunciating something else. You just laugh it off and went to the kitchen to put the pot on a stove to reheat it. “Since you’re not sick, I’ll just go home then!” You scratch your scalp even though it’s not itchy. “Can I go to the toilet?” You spotted the bathroom in Baekhyun’s room but he stands in front of you immediately. 

“Uh, you can use the other toilet? Near the kitchen?” You shrug and went to the toilet. Baekhyun must never let you see the picture of you he pins on his bathroom’s cabinet. You must never. He loves how much you care about him though. He tasted the soup you made and thought about fucking you in the kitchen when you’re cooking dinner for him. 

Even I can’t control myself

I put a bitter smile on my expressionless face

When the presentation goes well, you give everyone a hug of appreciation. You even hugged Baekhyun tightly. And that other guy in your group named Jongdae as well. Baekhyun clenched his fists. He didn’t want to punch Jongdae in front of you and scare you. 

“Let’s go eat somewhere!” One of your group mates suggested. Everyone thought it was a good idea. Baekhyun only agreed to come because you were going to be there. When you arrived at the restaurant, you sat beside Baekhyun and it shocked him. You even initiated conversation with him. 

But he sees you hugging Jongdae again when you go your separate ways and he’s furious. Baekhyun could only put on a fake smile. 

As you can see, I’m dangerous

Come closer, I need you

My head feels like it might burst

Get away, keep your distance

Game over

Baekhyun watches you as you take off your clothes. You forgot to close your curtains but Baekhyun wasn’t complaining. But he’s concerned if he’s not the only one looking at you. He looks around but sees no one so he takes his cock out to masturbate at the sight he has blessed you with. 

You’re also wearing red panties to university? Red is his favorite color and you don’t know how easy it made Baekhyun erect. He just wanted to rip the panties away from you and shove his cock so deep inside you. Baekhyun comes all over his car’s dashboard and cleans it with a tissue. He noticed that you finally closed your curtains. It was Baekhyun’s cue to go home. 

Baekhyun can’t wait until you’re finally his. But despite his overwhelming desire to own you, he knows you’re going to find out sooner or later the true nature of his being. He’s filled with darkness but he doesn’t want to soil your pureness. 

I'm psycho I'm psycho, there's somebody inside of me

That's right the psycho taking me over (Game over)

I'm psycho I'm psycho, he's talking to me

That's right the psycho, and I give in (Game over)

You entered the club and Baekhyun was already standing in the corner. He knows of your plans to go to the club when you talked about it during the class you shared together. He was there to make sure you were safe. And to make sure no one touched what was his. 

But of course, his nightmares happened. You were dancing and a random dude came up behind you and started griding on your ass. You were caught off guard and tried to get his hands off of you but he was so much stronger than you were. Baekhyun took matters into his owns hands and punched the living daylights out of the assaulter. 

You screamed when the guy started bleeding but Baekhyun showed no signs of stopping. Baekhyun was delivering jabs to the guy’s face and you were afraid he was going to die. Something.... or someone took over Baekhyun and he just wanted to kill the person who tried to touch you. He couldn’t because you tried to come in between the fight and he accidentally punched you. 

You whimpered and held your stomach as he carried you into his car to drive you to his home. When you arrived, he placed you on his bed and got you water. He said sorry multiple times and tried to explain himself but you shut him up by giving him a kiss. 

“It’s okay, Baekhyun. You were just trying to protect me. And to be honest, I liked it.” Baekhyun’s eyes widen. He’s going to come in his pants if you don’t stop looking at him like that. Like you needed him. You kiss him one more time and he leaves you to let you rest. He probably won’t be able to control himself if you and he do something more than kissing. 

What you're seeing now

Take a guess, who am I this time?

In the blink of an eye

I can change my face

You think it’s crazy how easily Baekhyun can change his expressions. One minute he’s smiling and laughing at how you messed up the arcade game you’re playing together with him and the other minute his nostrils are flaring when someone cat calls you. 

After that incident at the club, Baekhyun always tries to not punch every guy that disrespects you even though he finds it very hard. But your arms hugging around his own melts his heart and he does it for the sake of not scaring you. You love it when he protects you but you hate it when he’s blinded by anger and punches everyone. Baekhyun is strong and even a single punch should be able to knock someone out. 

“Baekhyun, don’t,” you warn. You kiss his fingers as you look up at him. His frown shifts slightly but it’s not a smile yet. He shoots the guy that cat called you a look and growled at him. “You disrespect my girl once more and I’ll kill you for real.” Baekhyun turns his eyes to look back at you and he can see the way your brows furrow in worry. 

“I won’t, angel.” You smile at the nickname he’s been calling you ever since you started dating. It’s incredibly romantic and you find yourself falling deeper and deeper into Baekhyun’s charms. You stand on your tippy toes and peck Baekhyun softly on his lips. He cradles your face with his hands and kisses you deeper. He opens his right eye and stares at the guy with a deadly gaze. With a smirk, he kisses you deeply in front of him and his friends. 

That’ll show them who fucking owns you.

I feel like I'm going crazy

You probably won't understand me

All of this was you (woo)

Baekhyun inhales your scent deeply as he watches you sleep beside him. You just had a date with him that resulted in a heavy make-out session and you fell asleep right after you changed into his oversized t-shirt. He thinks you look small like this and even teases you about it. You roll your eyes and slept inside his arms. 

He’s having trouble sleeping because you’re so close to him and it’s distracting him. Something dark awakens inside him and he has the overwhelming urge to just bend you over and fuck you relentlessly now that you’re this close to him. All he has to do is push your body slightly so he could-

“I love you,” you murmur in your sleep. Baekhyun could barely hear you but he catches what you said loud and clear. His cock hardens at your confession and he can feel it pressing a little bit on your thighs. When you change your sleeping position and accidentally brush against his crotch area, he groans. 

Baekhyun unzips his pants and lowers it down a little bit so he could pull his cock out. He takes a deep breath once more and your sweet scent invades his sense of smell and he’s just thinking about how innocent you look under him. 

Baekhyun comes a little bit on the comforter and makes a mental note to change it tomorrow morning so you wouldn’t notice. He’s also going to tell you that he loves you so he could hear you tell him that for real and for the first time in his life, he’s truly excited about something. 

I'm psycho I'm psycho, there's somebody inside of me

That's right the psycho taking me over (Game over)

I'm psycho I'm psycho, he's talking to me

That's right the psycho, and I give in (Game over)

You’re panting under Baekhyun’s body because holy fuck, he just made you come three twice with just his fingers and mouth alone. Your hands hold onto his hair and you pull on it whenever he hits a spot within you that makes you see stars. You bite your lip as you watch Baekhyun licks his own, devouring the sweet juices that are dripping out of you. 

“I fucking love you,” he says for the nth time tonight. You smile at him and he leans in to kiss you on the mouth. You taste yourself on his tongue as he slides it inside your mouth to intertwine yours with his. “I love you too, Baekhyun,” you say as he kisses your neck down to your collarbone. 

Baekhyun shakes his head and presses his forehead against yours. His hot breath is fanning on your cheeks and his long eyelashes look really pretty from this angle. You admire the features you adore so much and kiss him quickly. He smiles. “I’ll love you for eternity, my angel. You are mine and I am yours.”

Baekhyun hopes you never know about the blood he has spilled just to get you in his arms. The news is reporting missing people and they are all people that have touched you, hugged you, or even said your name in front of Baekhyun. All Baekhyun has to get rid of now is your best friend, Sehun. 

Baekhyun wants to be the only man in your life and he’s willing to let that someone else inside of him to take over him. He’s a psycho, after all.

#baekhyun #baekhyun smut #baekhyun scenarios #baekhyun x you #baekhyun x reader #exo #exo smut #exo scenarios

[thatgirlintheaudience]

Dear Evan Hansen 1st National Tour- July 24, 2019 

Maria Wirries on as Alana

Ben Levi Ross is giving the performance of a lifetime as Evan Hansen. He had the audience in the palm of his hand. With one look or facial expression, he made the audience burst out laughing. His singing and acting was absolute perfection and I just thought he was phenomenal. From the minute he comes on stage, he speaks so fast and yet gets through his dialogue effortlessly. His singing voice is so clear and beautiful. 

In For Forever when he sings “or girls we wish would notice us, but never do,” he glances at Zoe and awkwardly looks away. And when Heidi is over at the Murphy's house and they’re explaining how much time they have been spending with Evan, he was sitting in a chair and was bouncing his leg up and down and looked like he was about to burst out crying. And when giving his speech, he crawls out of the spotlight and looked so scared. And when he began You Will Be Found he was crying and I could see the single tear stream down his cheek.  (I was second row, so I was blessed to notice very specific details!) He was just brilliant and I can not say enough good things about his performance. 

I also wanna shout out Jessica Phillips as Heidi Hansen. She was also phenomenal. Good For You was such a highlight for me. It was intense and gritty. The dialogue scenes between Heidi and Evan were just so intense and brilliantly delivered. They had a great connection and I love how they hug at each curtain call. Anyway everyone is just so angry and frustrated at Evan in Good For You and how they surround him as he tries to desperately save this story he’s created. 

In Anybody Have a Map? Cynthia and Connor are on the left side of the stage, while Heidi and Evan are on the right side, and it shows the parallels between the two moms and the two teenagers. How even though these two people come form different backgrounds and do not know each other, both moms are struggling to connect with their teenage sons and both sons are struggling on  their first day of senior year. Also, how in Waving Through A Window, everyone forms a circle around Evan and face away from him, but in You Will Be Found, they all face towards him. It was moments like this that literally had me saying wow out loud. It was also moments like that that makes me scream, “How does Michael Grief not have a Tony yet??!!” I really will never get over how Evan and Connor could have been friends. And Connor saying, “now we can both pretend we have friends” is a line that will forever hit emotionally hard for me and so many. 

Marrick Smith was a tough Connor. I can’t explain it well, but I always saw Mike Faist as a sort of playful and humorous Connor Murphy who tries to guide Evan after his death. Smith’s Connor was much more daunting and fully played upon the darker elements of Connor’s life. Just a different portrayal which I appreciate seeing since I believe Connor is a complex character who could have many different interpretations. 

Christiane Noll was completely heat breaking as Cynthia Murphy, especially when she hugs Connor’s pillow during Requiem. I think Cynthia is such a great character who doesn't always get the love she deserves. Just like Heidi, she is an imperfect mother who is trying her best. 

In act 2, Jared tells Evan that he can’t do much for the Connor project that weekend because he’s gonna be hanging out with his “real” friends. And when Evan says fine, we don’t need you anyway, Jared’s face is so hurt and he uses humor to act like he doesn’t care when he really so deeply cares! It’s very important, I think, to note that Jared and Alana feel just as lonely as Evan. It’s important to note how this (anxiety, depression, loneliness, disconnection) is happening to many people, not just Evan. It’s also important to note how Evan doesn't even realize how lonely Alana and Jared even are because in real life we don’t know how people truly feel. And how Heidi blames herself as a mother for not realizing how lonely Evan was. This is why this show is so important. 

Maggie McKenna was great as Zoe and she does have stars on the cuffs of her jeans! 

Also some other fun facts: the tweets shown before the show started were tweets from DJ Khaled, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, and Neil Degrasse Tyson. They were all from Fall 2016, which is right before the show opened on Broadway so it makes sense.  

Also when in Connor’s room during If I Could Tell Her, Connor’s room was shown on the screens. I noticed a middle finger poster and a no smoking sign. 

And in To Break in a Glove, that is real shaving cream because I could smell it! 

And then the blue sky at the end is just stunning and Evan finally gives a real smile to the spotlight which looks like the sun shining on his face. It is a beautiful ending. 

If this tour is coming to a city near you, do anything you can to go. You can read my Broadway review of the show under the tags theater review and dear evan hansen. Also I was in the balcony the first time I saw DEH and the second row this time. The response I had to the show was incredibly stronger this time. Do you all find similar experiences with this show or other shows? Orchestra seats versus balcony seats? Or are some shows just so good, it doesn't matter where you sit? Feel free to respond! 

But I love this show and I hope you enjoyed reading this!

#theater review #dear evan hansen #deh #ben levi ross #maggie mckenna #marrick smith #jessica phillips #christiane noll #aaron lazar #jared goldsmith #maria wirries

[seasaltmemories]

You Say You Wanna Go to Heaven, But You’re Human Tonight

Rating: T

Summary: And so, Alm added idolatry to the list of his sins.

~

The morning after Duma was slayed, Celica rose at dawn to pray.

The first time, Alm saw this, he had wondered if in her half-awaken haze she had somehow forgotten the events of yesterday.  Such a theory might sound crazy at first glance, but some mornings he imagined himself back in Ram Village.  Memories took a long time to die, so rather than inflict her any pain, he had faked slumber and let her go along her day, before “properly” waking up himself.

In time, he thought, they would both learn to accept the present.  Morning lies always faded away in the afternoon’s bright light.

But as the days turned into weeks and then months, still she continued to pray.  Ignorance nor denial could explain her actions.  She spoke of Mila’s and Duma’s demise with as much certainty as anyone else. Yet as busy as they were with rebuilding Valentia, she continued to find time to converse with those who would never answer her.

It would have been easy to write it off as madness, a quirk she had picked up to survive.  Most of them had strange habits of their own--like how Mathilda always carried a knife up her sleeve, even when the battlefield was far away and she was decked in her court finery, or how Valbar refused to be placed anywhere besides the front-lines, even when he looked ready to pass out from so much marching in his heavy army.  Everyone found their own way to cope, and the polite thing to do was turn away and pretend you didn’t notice anything.

But then Alm’s own idiosyncrasies made that difficult to do.  Like a voyeur, stealing away a moment of intimacy, he woke early to spy on her prayers.  He never let on that he was awake, rather he silently studied her closed eyes and clasped hands, searching for the method to it all.

It seemed faith had little to do with the gods themselves.

It wasn’t as if Alm had ever disliked religion.  Growing up, he had done everything expected of him: attended every religious holiday with a proper tribute of wool in tow, said his prayers to thank Mila for the year’s harvest, even as they dwindled with each famine.  But unlike Faye, whose eyes had sparkled with purpose when she had donned the clock and pledged herself to be Mila’s personal tool, Alm had never been able to understand such devotion.  He couldn’t give himself up for a being he had never even seen before.

The hypocrisy didn’t escape him.  It was because of Duma’s blessing, Valentia had deemed him their Saint-King.  Without Mila’s mercy, he would have been powerless to save Celica, forced to kill her by his own hand.  However it was those very boons that caused him to chafe against the concept.  Because if Duma had cursed him with his dying breath, if Mila had deemed Celica a proper sacrifice that must be made, was he supposed to have just step aside and bend to their will?  Was he supposed bleed himself dry for creatures whose talons had shed so much blood in the first place?

Even if the gods hadn’t been mad, hadn’t deserved to finally have some peace, he knew he would have slaughtered them still if it meant saving the life of one of his loved ones.  He couldn’t understand Celica having done the near opposite.  When they had discussed such matters in the dead of night, huddled together and whispering secrets against the other’s skin, her words might as well have been spoken in another language.

“Of course I rather live a long and happy life, but Valentia is much bigger than just you and me.”  Her red curls had tickled the crook of his neck and she settled in.  “It’s our birthright to take care of it.  My one life was hardly a price if it had really meant peace would return.”

There was no point in arguing with her when the matter was all said and done, but despite their physical closeness she seemed so far away in that moment--so virtuous and good that she was untouchable.  And later on it seemed as if he wasn’t the only one to feel this way.  Already many former clergy members had taken to preaching her as Mila incarnated as a human.  While most days he was glad for her, during lonely, selfish nights the devil inside would want to cut her wings, pin her to the earth, and never let her go.

“She promised herself to me, and me alone!  I’m sorry, world, but you can’t have her!”

Each time such a thought came to him, he followed the same routine.  He imagined himself picking up the thought, examining it thoroughly, and then locking it inside a black chest, never to be considered again.  Such a route was dangerous to travel, placing his love for his own desires over his love of Celica. Still whenever the box rattled and screamed, he cracked it open just one inch.  He allowed him to steal that one moment of privacy with what remained of the gods.

In the last week or so, Celica had finally scheduled a meeting with her new acolytes.  It was useful to have such loyal allies during a change in power, but it was tricky business to keep such a following from getting distorted into an actual cult.  Still it was the first time they had been separated from the war.  Despite knowing she was safe and doing important work, it was difficult to calm his nerves.

She was due to return in the early morning, so he tried to get some sleep.  Still he tossed and turned throughout the night, getting little rest.  He must have dozed at one point, because he ended up waking with a start when he heard the door to his quarters open.

“Hello, darling,” Celica whispered as she entered.  “I’m home.”

“Celica...what are you wearing?”  It was a pitiful response, bu  the outside light haloed her body provided just enough illumination for him to make out that she was wearing a saint’s garb.  Such a choice perplexed him so, he lost any greetings he might have offered up.

“It’s a long story, but the Church of the One Kingdom offered me a promotion,”  She padded across the room to sit at her dresser.  “Even though technically priestesses can’t qualify as saints...I must look ridiculous, don’t I?”

Ridiculous was far from the truth.  She looked radiant, holy, every bit of the heavenly angel they believed her to be.  It made his heart ache like nothing else.

“It’s late, so feel free to go back to sleep.  I’ll tell you about my day in the morning proper.”

“I’m not that tired, I don’t mind staying up longer.”

“Don’t worry, you won’t miss a thing.  I”ll make sure it’s the first thing I do.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

Silence seized the two of them.  Shame compelled Alm to turn away.  He didn’t deserve to look at her after such a blasphemous slight, but there was some enthralling about the sight of her staring at him like that.  Celica had removed her makeup yet still remained gowned.  It was if she was caught between the divine and the earthly.

Slowly, she removed the pins from her hair.  It fell like a curtain across her shoulders.  “You’re right.  I guess I’ve gotten used to white lies in my time away.  The things they expect of me...”

“You’ve earned your stunning reputation though.”  Alm insisted.  “No matter how difficult it is, you’ll always choose the right choice.”

“I guess, absence truly makes the heart grow fonder.”  She undid the tassels flowing from her sleeves before taking off her gloves.  It was strange how much beauty seemed to linger in such a simple motion.  “Although we must be living proof of it.”

“There’s something tantalizing about what you can’t have.” He was trying not to concentrate on the heat pooling in his belly, but he couldn’t stop his breath from hitching as she unfastened her breastplate.  Still he could not look away.

“Where did you get the idea that I am not yours?”  Celica laughed. She made a show of sliding her hands down the curves of her body as she removed her skirts.  “You usually wear green with more grace.”

How odd.  He felt more like a heretic to be called out for his jealousy of the gods than he did after slaying them with his own hands.  “I’m just a fool chasing after a girl too important for his little dreams.  Didn’t stop to consider my competition until it was too late.”

“You of all people shouldn’t put me on a pedestal.”  She shucked the last of her clothes until only her small-clothes remained. “I’m too flawed to survive up there.”

“You don’t think you’ll resent me for dragging you down?”  You didn’t tame envy by fanning its flames, but oh if he could be allowed this moment of weakness.  She had already shed so much of her celestial exterior for him.  He didn’t want to be her world forever, only for this night.

Instead of responding, she slide off the last of her modesty.  From the foot of their bed, she crawled on all fours until she was perched in his lap.  Faintly her tongue traced the shell of his ear.  “As long as you know how to worship me properly.”

And so, Alm added idolatry to the list of his sins.

A.N. Religion is fascinating to me, especially in the context of Celica’s arc where her devotion remains yet she kills a god (and later gets imagined as one in her ending), I also for a dreamwidth event got challenged to write a story with a striptease in it, and this Bastille song has been in my head, so as usual I set about trying to weave together differing elements 

#fire emblem echoes #celicalm #celica #alm #fe echoes #my lame writing #otp: I'll send a storm to capture your heart and bring you home #ships and deserts and swamps oh my #As always I try and add a million things to one fic