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cookie-crumblr · 28 days

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The Smell of Smoke

F!Reader x Yandere Bully OC

Part 8~

His Info: 🖕✨

Part 1 — Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

!!!MINORS DNI!!!

CW: F! Reader, reader has a vagina, reader referred to as she/her, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, NON CON HARD DRUG USAGE(HEROIN), Hospital setting, fire, murder, blood, car accident, high speed car chase, explicit language, descriptive death scene, fighting

The syringe…

The way it pierced your skin like a thin pick of ice, you yelped and tried to stop him. You pushed and pushed but you are just too weak.

And he’s just too strong.

He holds you down, and covers your mouth so you can’t even scream.

The burning intensity of the drug rushing immediately through your veins when he pushes the plug down.

It feels better than the best sex you’ve ever had.

An all body orgasm, with the intensity cranked up to a million. It’s hot, like magma, but it’s not painful in the least. Even the pin prick has vanished into immense and all encapsulating pleasure.

It’s better than heaven, you’d never feel something so amazing anywhere imaginable, except right here on this debauched planet.

You wet yourself, unable to control your bladder anymore, and your body begins to convulse. You’re puking but you can’t even tell, you’re too consumed by the ecstasy.

You tried your hardest to fight… and this is how you die?

…

He lays you on your side as foam and bile start to spill from the side of your lips.

You’re overdosing.

He’s gonna kill you.

He’s really gonna kill you.

You’ll be free at last… at least.

He won’t be able to hurt you now…

You don’t feel too afraid anymore.

*Beep…*

*Beeeeeeeeeeeeep*

“Code Blue! Code Blue!” You’re hearing people rush all around your body, but you aren’t here.

You’re somewhere floating above.

Somewhere dark, with sickly hands ferrying you somewhere. You can’t see with your eyes, but your mind, the hands are made of the tar that’s in your veins.

When suddenly,

*GASP* *COUGH* There’s something in your throat! It’s helping you breathe but it’s so painful! you cough around the strange intrusion, and feel like your gonna throw up more.

The nurses and doctors rush to un-intubate you, since you can breathe on your own again.

You sit up without thinking your body actually responding properly again, you must’ve at least gotten some rest this time.

The nurses tell you to lay back down as the machines all screech around you.

The first recognizable person you see is Ace.

He’s struggling against the nurses that are holding him away from the door to your room as his eyes are trained, locked in on yours.

No one’s ever fought like that just to make sure you’re okay, and you feel something warm in your chest thrum.

Soon Ezra comes up to him and places a hand on his shoulder, stopping Ace from actually hurting anyone.

When Ezra faces you, you start to sob, and your body shakes violently.

Everything he’s put you through,

*BEEP BEEP—BEEP BEEP— BEEP BEEP*

“Calm her down! Get those boys away from her!”

They rush around again giving you things in your various tubes connected to your arm.

You want to say no! at least leave Ace… You don’t want to be alone… You don’t want Ezra to come back without him.

But your throat is hoarse and you can’t speak through the shivers.

You fall back unconscious.

When you come to, Ezra is waiting. His arm is bandaged, and he’s smoking in your hospital room. You go to press the call button…

When your shaking fingers are almost there,

he grabs your wrist tight.

You choke out a sob, you want desperately to keep fighting, but how much more can you actually take.

He removes your blanket from your thigh and puts out his cigarette on your non-broken, non branded leg.

You hiss, the pain becoming far too familiar for your liking.

“You’re getting better at taking what I give you,” he smirks.

“H-how…” You speak without stopping yourself, You don’t even recognize your own voice as it’s so hoarse.“How are you still smiling…?” It’s horrific. All that he’s done to you.

Really, truly, horrific. And he just,

isn’t done.

He’ll never be done,

and that realization is setting in fully now.

He’s never going to stop, until he actually kills you.

His smile only grows with your realization.

Soon he’s checking you out saying that someone at a party shot you up, and taking your limping form to his BMW then shoving you into the back.

You claw at your head and collapse into yourself.

This can’t keep going on! You can’t take anymore! you really are about to break…

Your mind is shattering and there’s nothing you can do about it.

When your about to give in, you see Ace speeding up behind you… He’s in his own car and he’s catching up to you both.

He pulls up beside Ezra, and Ezra speeds up, trying to pass his younger brother.

You’re shaking in the backseat and you buckle yourself in, just in case you crash.

Ace is focused on driving but the way he looked at the black tinted back windows, as if he could see you. Your heart flip flopped. No! You think… If you have hope it’ll only hurt you more when it also shatters…

You don’t know what to do or what to think when you feel the car lurch and a sound of plastics crunching.

Your in the middle seat but the car door next to you crunches inward, you scream! the whole car spins violently before Ezra regains control.

It’s Ace you know it is, but it’s so scary!

Ezra’s driving like a maniac and his brother is too, they’re now trying to run eachother off the road.

You see a wearhouse coming up on the horizon with billowing smoke stacks that look like cigarettes puffing black smog into the blue sky.

Right before the car is in the air, upside down, and squealing, and the smell of burnt rubber and plastics assaults your senses.

You’re glad when all the motion stops, that you put your seat belt on.

Ezra hit his head! He’s unconscious!! You reach next to him and unlock your door, rushing, you’re able to get out and you go to Ace’s upside down, smoking, car. There’s blood covering his face, and soaking his pink hair, making it a deep crimson.

You use your elbow and smash the window without thinking. You must have strength from all the adrenaline rushing through you, cause it shatters.

You use your shirt to get rid of the cubed shards of glass, and are able to unbuckle him and pull him out.

you try your best to leave him the way he was and listen for his heart, and if he’s breathing.

You have a flashback to something you’ve seen before about the song “stayin alive” and how it matches the pulsing motion you need to preform.

His body is silent, and you start chest compressions.

There’s no sound, just the song in your head and your ragged breathing as you put your whole weight down into his chest over and over again.

soon enough Ace gasps, coughing and spitting, and the sound finally comes in. Birds and insects buzz alighting the atmosphere with even more excitement and commotion. the cars groan and crackle with their embers.

Ace reaches up to your face. his bloodshot eyes move from yours to behind you, and he jumps up and throws you behind him. You land roughly on your casted leg and yelp, finally remembering that it is still broken.

Ace shouts, “Ezra!!! ENOUGH!!!” Ezra has a cigarette in his mouth already, and blood all over him matching Ace.

One of them is dying tonight.

You can see this fact now.

“Ezra!! Stop!” You yell and grab Ace’s hand pulling him with you. Through a tall grassy field you run. As you’re trying to run to those smoke stacks in the near distance you feel yourself float for a second, thinking you’re falling you brace, but find that Ace scooped you up, to run with you in his arms.

He saw where you were heading and follows your instinct.

You use this opportunity to look over Ace’s should at Ezra chasing you both. He’s gaining on you.

Ace makes it with you in his arms to the factory and finds a rusted, paint chipped side door, he squeezes you both through, and then rushes through piles of scrap and steel beams, and ginormous vats of whatever.

There’s sunlight barely streaming through the dusty windows that line the top of the room.

But…

There’s no people here!

Nobody to help!

Fuck! what do you do!

Ace puts you down behind a pile of various materials and covers his lip with his finger letting you know to be silent.

You shake your head no! don’t leave me!! please! don’t go Ace! You scream in your own skull.

but he’s running off, going to meet with his brother and end this in a building that smells like smoke.

Your feelings are rushing, adrenaline pumping through your veins, and you glance at everything around you, you finally get an idea.

It’s a horrendous idea that could go horribly wrong… But you intend to finish this first.

These vats, they’re bubbling and there’s wooden beams and a wooden second layer, maybe you could get Ezra’s lighter and start a fire…

There’s levers on the sides of them that open up, as long as the carts aren’t underneath the opening to collect the substance, you could cover this whole floor with whatever’s in there. You start to push the carts out of the way, they’re heavy and they squeal rustily as the roll on the tracks.

You won’t go down without a fight. You aren’t about to let an innocent person die for you.

Once again you steel your frazzled nerves.

Now to find Ezra before Ace does and bait him here.

You bolt, ignoring the pain in your leg, and even though your movement is hindered you push through moving fast!

You can do this!

You round a corner and full body into the man you’re looking for. He stares down at you smirking, before he grabs you by the arms, and you panic momentarily before remembering that this is exactly what you needed.

you have to get that lighter, or….

The cigarette in his mouth. You use your good leg to kick the bone of his ankle. he doubles over in sudden pain, and confusion strikes him as you yank the cigarette from his lips. His confusion makes you able to worm yourself free from his grasp!

he’s faster than you, but walks to chase after you. Hah!

He doesn’t know you have a plan!

You can do this! You really can!

“Y/N~” He laughs, “You’re not gettin’ away from me, jus’ stop fightin’ and give in already, would’ya,”

He stalks after you, not even a little suspicious of why you took his cig.

You run back around the corner and down the dingy halls and up a few metal stairs up to the vats and pull the vat lever, it’s so heavy you use your full weight to actually push down all the way and get it to…

*chur-CHUNK* the ground rumbles as Black bubbling liquid pours out all over the cement, and around the beams, you’re on a metal platform above it thankfully.

“EZRAAAAAA!” You scream, ready to end this.

His brow furrows as your eyes meet his, and you toss the cigarette onto the tar, igniting the whole floor.

*FWOOSH* The flames take to the liquid instantly, you cover you nose with the baggy hospital clothes as oxygen is whipped past you and sucked to the blaze.

Ezra is just outside of the spill and the fire, he thinks you’ve failed as he’s smirking sinisterly, he doesn’t notice the wooden platform above him.

You start pulling smaller levers on the control panel and hitting buttons in a frenzy trying to find anything that could help, and fast!

No! You see the shadow of another man through the fire!

“ACEE!!!!!” The weakened wooden beams crash in on themselves and the floor collapses down lighting on fire as they fall. Ashes and smoke fill the mostly closed building.

You cough and look over the flames.

Ezra is still smiling at you, but it’s different now. He doesn’t even notice his brother in peril!

You have to save Ace! the building is going up in flames now, and you’re running out of time.

If he’s even alive!

More beams and supports fall before you, creating an opening. You move without thinking.

Your lungs burn and the fire licks at your skin through your clothes.

Sirens can be heard in the distance finally.

You’re going to get out of this! you are!

But it’ll be for nothing if Ezra exits this wearhouse too.

First you have to make it to Ace.

He’s under a fallen beam over his upper body!

You don’t even think about it you just start to lift it with inhuman strength. Ace is able to crawl out, he’s coughing badly from the smoke though, and probably has a collapsed lung! Gods!

Ezra grabs you from behind and starts pulling you with him into the roaring flames. Your cast feels hot!!

You swing your broken leg around like a dead weight and land the hard cast right into his knee, causing him to buckle down.

You push him into the fire and tar.

The embers take to him fast, and the last thing you see of Ezra, is his smiling face as his skin turns pitch black, peels, and evaporates off his bone. New ashes rise and you cover your nose harder, not wanting a single bit of him inside you ever again.

He looked oddly… At peace.

The firefighters get you and Ace out. They can do little for the building, but you couldn’t care less.

No one suspects either of you of anything. Just a freak accident and some young 20 somethings exploring buildings they shouldn’t.

No one asked why the tar spilled. So you didn’t say.

The building was apparently insured quite well so they got more money than it was worth and didn’t need to be concerned.

They were more concerned about the car crash and why you were in a high speed chase.

But after the culprit’s charred body was recovered they saw no need to investigate further with his previous record collaborating your story. Although you told the truth you omitted that Ace actually started it.

Thankfully, he did too.

You watch Ezra’s body being moved from the wearhouse to the ambulance in a black body bag. He’s really dead.

You allow yourself a final sigh of relief, as the oxygen pump cycles through your lungs with Ace by your side.

note from cookie: wowie! this one was different from usual, i hope you all enjoyed! i had a lot of fun writing it and finally this bastard got what he deserved!!!

Special thanks to @kawaiikitty67 and @valyalyon for the ideas and inspiration!! tysm for the help!!!!! I needed it! i was in an inspirational rut for a while T.T <3

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avisisisis · 5 months

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Something I love about ATLA is that it doesn't force the "forgive the villain" on all the characters. It's been left clear that Ozai is a bad person, and there's no chance of redemption; the only reason he's not dead yet is because Aang is a pacifist

The one episode where a character is supposed to forgive someone who has hurt them in the past is the one where Katara is off to kill a man (which, fair) and Zuko helps. In that episode, even if Aang is telling her to let go, she doesn't forgive him. She never will. But she spares him. Not because she thinks he doesn't deserve death (he does), but because she's not willing to continue the cycle of violence

Killing someone can have a very important impact in your entire being, mostly depending on who you are as a person. Aang would've never recovered from killing Ozai. Katara wouldn't be who she is now, had she taken her revenge on the man that killed her mother

And the best part of it is that Ozai doesn't deserve to die. Not in a "I'm defending him" way (ew), but in a "he deserves worse that than" way

Taking away his bending was the perfect punishment for him. He believed bending made you superior and he never cared enough to train something besides his bending. What a loser. Zuko and Azula wouldn't be restrained by something like that

He's alive. Nobody has forgiven him. Nobody ever will

#on a “ozai deserves smth worse than death” mood #which is. my everyday mood but we're not talking about that #read a fic where ppl were mad ozai was still alive #zuko clarified that he's still alive not only bc that's what aang wanted but bc death would be a mercy for him #that's the man who ruined everybody's life(s). you can't tell me we can just let him die like that #and they're not even torturing him. he's just in prison #but he's so fucking weak that not having his bending = torture #pathetic #honestly what did he even do? his entire family was better than him #zuko was better at any kind of fighting and he learned firebending from the fucking dragons #azula is. azula! she bends blue fire and is the best at lighting n stuff #iroh created a whole new bending technique and broke out of prison w no bending #ursa killed the fucking fire lord #i mean sure ozai can shoot lighting out of his hands. but so can iroh! so can azula!#his 14 year old daughter is better than him #she could kick his ass if she wanted #but that's her dad right there and the obssession she has w pleasing him is straight up unhealthy #man. poor azula #anyways back to the point: ozai is pathetic #loserlord indeed #atla #avatar the last airbender #fire lord ozai #zuko #aang #katara #azula #uncle iroh #avis' post #avis talks

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seize-the-dms · 1 year

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My favorite dps head canon is that Todd is just the most deranged but he has social anxiety so nobody knows

#I love fics where Todd just does something insane #and the other poets are like what #todd anderson is not a light weight #Todd Anderson swears like a sailor #Todd Anderson would light a car on fire if dared to do so #Todd could win a fight against God #dead poets society #todd anderson #anderperry #shut up cam #dps memes #dps #dps fandom #dps head canon

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goldenblu · 3 months

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i’m plotting out how the egghead arc is gonna go in my emotionless sanji au, and that + recent manga chapters have got me thinking about sanji and kuma potentially being parallels (or foils? idfk)

sanji, who is slowly having his emotions stripped away from him, for no reason other than the fact that terrible things were done to him before birth by an uncaring father.

and then there’s kuma. everything kuma did, every act of kindness disguised as cruelty, every choice he made—it was all for a hope in a better future, for a liberation he would not get to see. for a child he loved and was loved by.

both of them, meant to be weapons. neither of them wanted to be.

but at the end of the day, kuma is a father who sacrificed his humanity to save his daughter.

and sanji…well, sanji is a son whose humanity was sacrificed to serve his father.

do you see it. do you see my vision.

#one piece #sanji #black leg sanji #kuma #bartholomew kuma #egghead arc #one piece manga spoilers #one piece 1104 #i can’t tell if i’m onto something or if i’m just going insane #fuck it we ball im putting it in the fic anyway #kuma fighting for his humanity to save bonney from saturn in one last act of love...#maybe i should wait to see how the next few chapters of egghead play out hhhhh #emotionless sanji au #mine #my writing #hold your fire by the throat

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alexis-royce · 9 months

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Please indicate when you're done with the Starved Event because Pages thoughts are being thought and I wanna know what your thoughts are about one particular scene later in the event.

My vote's for poison. How quickly we forget that it's been implied that Pages taxidermies authors that it really likes

#Fallen London Spoilers #Fallen London #Mr Pages #The dictionary is telling me that taxidermy isn't a verb with conjugations #Oh dear what about LEXIDERMY #OH DEAR OH MY #Anyway I expected Irons and Fires to show back up at the end #But Pages was an absolute treat #I assume Irons and Fires actually cared about protecting London #Or at least Irons was happy to have a good fight #Did Pages just want to show off???#Make a big speech?#Pages why did you show up to fight you don't even want to stay here #I mean for The Academic's timeline this uh #This certainly means something #If I have time maybe that fic will get a second chapter #Eeeeheeheeeheee #I'll bet that Pages had to watch The Academic die #HEEHEEHEEHEEEE #I'm CERTAIN it didn't care at all #I'm CERTAIN it wasn't worried in the least that a stray photon of sunlight might've hit the exceptionally unlawful Mr Cards #Instantly wiping them out of existence #Actually EVERYONE should be writing fics with their PCs right now #You ALL have a perfect opportunity to make your loved ones SICK WITH WORRY #Have you considered the TERROR as your fav NPCs watched you soar right into the sun???#The Ex-Disgraced Academic #Scribbles #Picshuas

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daffi-990 · 6 months

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Fuck it Friday

Tagged by the kind, wonderful and talented @hippolotamus 💕🦛

Chapters 1 & 2 of Rival Firefighters 🚒 are almost done annnnnd I’ve almost finished chapter 4 as well even though I have nothing written for chapter 3, only notes and an outline haha 😅

Buck getting fired in chapter one (just like he does in the pilot episode of season 1) is kinda kicking my ass. I just feel like he goes from “yeah I’ll steal the truck for sex” to “it was wrong to steal the truck for sex” really fast … but I guess losing your job really opens your eyes and puts things into perspective.

Here’s part of the firing scene that I don’t think sucks, so enjoy!

“No, Bobby. Bobby!” He runs in front of Bobby, placing a hand on his chest to stop him from leaving. “I need this job! Look, I love this job. Don't do this to me.” Buck begs, panic beginning to set in. He can’t lose this job. He can’t. “I don't have anything else,” he says as a last ditch attempt to change Bobby’s mind, but deep down he knows it’s no use.

“I'm sorry, kid. I said you're done.”

And Bobby actually does look sorry, which makes it hurt even more.

This is really happening, he’s really just lost the one thing in his life that made sense. Being a firefighter felt right, like Buck was exactly where he was meant to be. All the other jobs over the years, Buck always knew they had a time limit, a countdown beginning as soon as he started. But not firefighting. Sure, deciding to become a firefighter was a spontaneous random decision he made while bartending in Peru, but once he was in LA and all signed up at the academy, something had settled within him and he knew this time was different.

Bobby stops at the roof’s edge and calls out to him. “Bring the ladder truck back to the station immediately and then clean out your locker.”

Buck follows silently after him, his mind going a mile a minute, the sharp sting of venomous thoughts settling in. Fuck up. Can’t even keep a job. Not good enough. Failure. You cared about this job and still managed to fuck it up. This is why you can’t have nice things, because you break them.

He doesn’t remember the climb down or the drive back to the station or even getting out of the truck and returning the keys before making his way to the locker room. It’s like his body is moving on autopilot. Buck slumps down on the bench in front of the lockers in defeat, opening his locker and pulling his duffle bag out so he can start cleaning his stuff out. He hears the door open and the shuffling of feet and turns his head to see Hen cautiously approaching him.

“I guess you heard?” He turns back to his locker and grabs his spare clothes, shoving them roughly into his duffle.

No pressure tagging: @thewolvesof1998 @lover-of-mine @loserdiaz @wikiangela @monsterrae1 @fortheloveofbuddie @forthewolves @eddiebabygirldiaz @jeeyuns @callmenewbie @mellaithwen @captain-hen @ladydorian05 @jesuisici33 @honestlydarkprincess @hoodie-buck @giddyupbuck @devirnis @disasterbuckdiaz @spotsandsocks @athenagranted @try-set-me-on-fire @rainbow-nerdss @spagheddiediaz @wildlife4life @weewootruck @watchyourbuck @steadfastsaturnsrings

#honestly fighting the urge to delete everything I’ve written #think I just need to send what I have to a friend and get a second opinion #🤪🤪🤪#isn’t writing fun haha #daffi writes #buddie wip #buddie #and no .. Buck did not steal the fire truck to have sex with Eddie lol #rival firefighters fic #also Buck 1.0 can be hard to write #I miss writing S6 Buck 😅

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ezeva · 4 days

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I recently start to read the morai and the lair of death and vipers by fightfirewithfire and i completely adore it, its so brilliant and its not even finish, but its one of big drarry fic who exist and i cant stop myself to read it soooo, i try to draw all of reference i can think in that, and try to draw harry the most closer to the author description

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innytoes · 16 days

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🐝 Fuck Kintsugi, We're Going To Duct Tape Our Love

Fuck Kintsugi, We're Going To Duct Tape Our Love

Alex had been so greatful when his boyfriend introduced them to his adoptive father, world famous record exec Caleb Covington. They had been all too happy to sign the contract, not reading as thoroughly as they should have. Not knowing that they'd practically sold their souls until it was too late. It didn't help that Willie disappeared two weeks later, sent to a boarding school in another country.

Seven grueling years, an internet campaign called #freeSunsetCurve, and several lawyers later, they finally have their lives back. And Alex, who had been in charge of secretly communicating with FreeSunsetCurve's leader, finally gets to meet the person behind the username and buy them a hotdog, an inside joke that had developed over the years.

Except standing at the hotdog cart in New York is Willie.

They have a lot to talk about.

#julie and the phantoms #willex #fanfic #fake fics #alex mercer #willie throckmorton #alex was in charge of the subterfuge he was the best at it and adults always trusted him #Bobby was in charge of communicating with the lawyer once they got one #Luke and Reggie were in charge of distracting Caleb #Luke by picking fights with him #and Reggie by causing sweet himbo chaos that had Caleb and the PR team running around trying to put out his fires #like that time he promised that all the money from a certain concert would be going towards some charity #on live TV #I wrote a thing #I am not writing a thing

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yellowocaballero · 3 months

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Every single one of you ,” Dimitri gritted out - teeth clenched, eyes wild, “write to your fathers and inform your Houses. If Crown Prince Dimitri Alexandre Blayddid gets one more word of a marriage proposal then he is going to strip you down to baron and confiscate your taxes for the next year .”

“Uh huh ,” Sylvain said, writing furiously. Ingrid, Felix, and Mercedes were also obviously writing the words down. “And what should I say if you hear any more about the saintess’ babies?”

“Make Felix write the threat,” Dimitri said. “I’ll sign off on it.”

“Is this extra credit?” Felix asked Byleth.

“Sure,” she said. “Why not.”

“I don’t know,” Mercedes said thoughtfully. “I think this is the first time any young noble lady has been pressured to marry another woman. It’s a little beautiful. In its own way.”

“Then tell your guardian that Crown Prince Dimitri approves all same-sex marriages except the one to the saintess !”

“Oh, how nice. Will you make that a policy?”

“I think that’s an excellent idea,” Dedue said.

“It would be a just and egalitarian policy,” Dimitri said aggressively. “But more importantly -”

In which Byleth fields a great deal of marriage proposals, Dimitri reaches an important developmental milestone, and all is lost. Also the story stops being funny like halfway through this chapter and doesn't get very funny again, so sorry! Lol!

#my writing #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #dimileth #YAY WE'RE HERE #we are now at One Of The Points Of The Fic YAY <3 #i did make it seem like a comedy but <3 not really <3 #real mulan 'no more singing after girl worth fighting for' energy

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tanaleth · 10 months

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Anniversary art for my Dragon Age fanfic. I don't know where the time goes, but I will always have a soft spot for my NPC rarepair.

#fun fact: when I started that fic the term 'npc' was not yet a reactionary slur!#anyway I'm reclaiming it. fight me losers #or... fight her actually #dragon age #dragon age templars #see fire and go towards light #dragon age lysette #my art #stained glass

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gentrychild · 1 year

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Rotating your anyone fic in my head 24/7 like food in a microwave

That's a mood.

#Personally I just have Izuku and Kouta and Muscular waiting patiently on their cliff #Maybe playing cards or sharing stories so they don't get bored #Waiting for me to write the fight #While the UA kids are screaming and running from the fire #anyone fic

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cornerful · 1 month

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Sméagol and the Gift

'Now!' said Sam. 'At last I can deal with you!' He leaped forward with drawn blade ready for battle. But Gollum did not spring. He fell flat upon the ground and whimpered.

'Don't kill us,' he wept. 'Don't hurt us with nassty cruel steel! Let us live, yes, live just a little longer. Lost lost! We're lost. And when Precious goes we'll die, yes, die into the dust.'

Devastated by this. Just a little longer, he begs. Even though his existence is a torment. Even though the will that holds him to life is barely his own anymore. He has long outlived his time but it's such a cruelty that now the only freedom for him is in death. I'm glad Sam didn't kill him but the whole scenario is awful.

When a mortal keeps a ring of power he does not gain more life, he continues, denied natural mortality as the fear of death is amplified and twisted into fear of separation, nothing matters anymore but the keeping, the continuing. In that miserable existence there is no peace, and at its end there is no graceful goodbye to life, there is only dust. Sudden, empty, and final.

It would take murder to spare him that. Or falling with the ring into the fire.

Bilbo let it go in time (did he feel anything when it was destroyed?) Frodo is freed of it now, though the toll it extracted for the separation was at very least a finger. It was too late for Gollum for the price to be anything other than it was, and that's brutal.

If you live long enough, death is no longer the enemy. What Sauron did to Gollum ensured that it would always be the enemy, to be feared and avoided for ever, once time and the ring had fashioned it into the only escape left. Evil.

#lotr newsletter #suicide mention in tags #haunted by the au in which gollum goes into the fire with the ring On Purpose #bc he still couldnt separate himself from it but frodo's compassion had somewhat released him from its evil #in a way an honor to frodo's quest and in a way an act of mercy to be able to give up the self-torment #which gives me shrimp feelings bc of the everything but also back to the original point that it is so tragic that death is all that awaits #bc death is natural and that was taken from him. what is the will to live in the absence of natural death?#smth deeply horrible about that #matt bugg screaming we'll be dust. so famous and rent free #lotrn325 #damn it im having more thoughts #wraiths vs gollum: discuss #the nature of the ring kept affects the nature of its possession no? those rings were made FOR thralldom #sauron has power over gollum but not That Much and his own ring is all abt the domination #what would a 2000 year old gollum even be like ._.#the wraiths are probably even more tragic bc at this point they're like...undead. even death isn't freedom #on that topic what happened to the witch-king's spirit fr #I'm pretty sure he isn't ever actually called that in the book but it's epic and gender and way snappier than lord of the nazgul #anyway shoutout to i think yambits for breaking the lore and giving them peace that was sick #where's my gollum rehab fic #i know he's a horrible little man who is constantly trying to murder my boys but i love him so #the au...gollum gaining the willpower to destroy himself because he was given trust and kindness and companionship for once. FUCKED UP.#fucked up horrible i need a minute. being shown compassion and then becoming more self-compassionate. epic #that compassion entailing seeking the freedom of death your soul was denied bc this is fantasy and somehow the exact #arc that usually leads to fighting to live is now flipped. HUH.#yeah jirt alluded to his motivation being For Frodo but i maintain that the willingness to die is HUGE there and extremely relevant #me and my red string keeping me company #ugh tag championships i win i think but at what cost #who wants to spin around miserably in a pool like franknfurter with me as we listen to gollum's song #tam you're already invited i have a floaty for u

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ssreeder · 2 months

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hi, I don't use tumblr often, but i when i do, i always check your account to check if you posted something. LIAB is amazing. i truly have no words. i have read a LOT of fanfics from very different fandoms and i can confidently say that Leaving It All Behind is the best one i have ever read. the world you've built around the main characters is so deep, and realistic. even though benders are not real, it feels like i'm reading about true events. you describe the horrors of war and trauma so well. i'm actually very, very impressed. i happen to be a person that suffers from ptsd and other mental illnesses and and the way you portray traumatized characters is very realistic. i know you always say that the main characters' recovery is unrealistically fast, but don't worry about that. the way you describe zuko and sokka's feelings is perfect. their recovery doesn't seem rushed. it just looks like they're adapting and learning how to deal with it fast (we have to remember that the war is still very much happening and sadly they don't have a lot of time to deal with everything that happened to them). i'm so grateful i found your work. it's truly amazing, i hope you won't give up on writing when you finish the LIAB trilogy. have a good day/night

AWWWW OMG THANK YOU <3

seriously this was so kind I’m still in shock. I’m so happy you think the healing arc is realistic because I try to balance the stories pace with the characters struggles and emotions (some of them make it DIFFICULT haha) but I’m always worried it doesn’t translate well.

I have a lot of fun writing LIAB & I’m really glad you like it so much. I hope I continue to make you proud & thank you so much for this amazing ask you made my day <3

#This is so validating you have no idea ahhhh #I have read so many fics where the chatacter (zuko lol) has gone through extreme trauma or torture and he gets rescued or escapes #& then it’s like after a quick patch up job he is essentially back to normal #Which… no. lol. I can’t do it!#Trauma follows a person whether they like it or not & everyone copes differently to it #So even with zuko and sokka going through so much they’ll both handle their trauma completely different #I try to show that lol so I’m glad you like it #I am totally worried about the upcoming battle though #Cause shits about to get really rough #But we are in a fun arc right now (as fun as liab can be it’s a fic about children fighting a war so idk… I’d say 25% fun 75% angst)#So we have a few more fun chapters idk 4/5 and then we are on the home stretch #Idk what I’ll do when it’s over this has been so much fun and I’m so sad it’ll come to an end this year #But thanks again for this amazing ask #Its comments and asks like this that pets the head and makes me feel like a good author lol #Gets me fired up to finish the fic!#Wohoooo thank you !!!#Deansnoodle #Zukka #liab #ITF #RIA #ask #Leaving it all behind

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yuriyuruandyuraart · 9 months

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Opinions on Dream? :^

SO many feelings about him omgg rant under cut please forgive me

okay so i don't really talk or draw him much cause honestly,,,most of the times i just think he's a bit....boring? or more accurately plain? not in a mean way either but just in a 'fades into the background' type of way like don't get me wrong!! he's a really nice friend to his peers, his feelings about his powers and aura making his relationships harder to navigate and trust along with his whole conflict with nightmare and morality about what's good and bad IS very cool!! and i love it whenever they write him to be complex and not on this black and white mentality or when he's just straight up following along his friends with no free will or with a dubious purpose without ever addressing his issues or feelings! it's just unsatisfying to me :')

or when they're making him the 'naive' and oblivious, (sometimes childish?) character being marked as the obstacle and villain along with the other star sanses from the fic's pov, always talking about doing good things while fighting his brother and not hearing him out about the balance, (and for weak reasons most of the time. like it's been so long and you STILL haven't sat down with him when he's, generally, basically begged you to just have a talk? guys please :'( ) or when they go for the victim sad dream always missing the old nightmare, where corrupted nightmare is the incarnation of evil, with no sympathy or emotion except anger and sadistic glee, killing and hurting everyone and dream's just trying to protect the multiverse and dream's always been in the right. such extremes!!!

LIKE!! i hope i'm not the only one that thinks a 500+ year old should have had enough time to idk. learn things? about people and manipulation and deceit? after knowing what the villagers did to night? about the bad things in the world and how there's a lot of grey areas in life and that he maybe reflected on his past enough to process and ask himself if there should to be a convo to settle his differences with nightmare (and you can make nightmare the stubborn one too! or have them BOTH be petty and imperfect and have some things wrong and some right at the same time like why do i always see the good guy vs bad guy cliché with these two when they're the perfect example of why positivity doesn't have meaning without the negativity!! as long as there's a satisfying evolution or growth that doesn't leave me empty i'm good yknow?)

plus i believe dream really isn't as dumb as people view him. i do get some of you saying he probably can't read or write since that's actually a pretty interesting idea to explore! but in general please let him have emotions other than pure sunshiny happiness or endless sadness like he's gotta have more depth than that! let him make mistakes, have flaws that don't just make him the bad guy that's always in the wrong by default, and be angry or suspicious or jealous or bitter or battling his mental health problems/depression or malicious or smart or witty or mischievous and silly or sarcastic or ANYTHING dude i just want him to be put into different scenarios where he can be serious or lighthearted like it doesn't even have to be long or perfect but make him feel real.

it could definitely be that i don't read or see much art about dream or really look for it hard enough but also i just. i feel bad for even saying this fr and i wanna be honest about why i don't enjoy most stories about him cause he always gets the worst treatment along with ink!!! especially ink omg the poor guy has it the worst i think like wow do they mess him up :'(

always one dimensional in non shippy fics, or too plain or easily replaceable by other, more entertaining people in the significant other's life in most of his ships like man. i have read fics out there that made me genuinely FEEL and root for him and love his character so much it restored all hope for me!!! but i can only name one on top of my head and the others? it's been so long i don't even remember their names i just legit feel terrible cause i love him still and i can't find many headcanons that fit my interpretation of him yknow?

not to say people who write him very happy, mislead or sad are ruining him like that's silly- if i see something i don't like i just. move on bro i wouldn't force people to feel or think the same way i do about him cause anyone can have whatever headcanons they want!!! just talking about what i personally look for in him and why i can't exactly find it since most of the stuff out there just isn't my cup of tea :')

hopefully i didn't set anyone off with this rambling opinionated essay i just pulled hhh xD i know i know he's a popular character and i know a lot of people like dream so *sobs* please please recommend me artists and fics about him that you think is good it's been so looong since i've read or seen anything new that makes me attached to this little guy aughg<33333

#ask #rambling #delete later?#probably xD i just wanna love him SO much but sometimes he's just *sigh*...forgettable #i tried to explain myself but also it's like 4 am and i skimmed through the proofreading so don't take this too seriously HHH #like really even when i do read good fics about him he's not on the forefront of my mind and it's painful to me :'(#i used to see him as my third fav but now? ever since i've read and seen characters who get heavier more in depth plots?#i can't say it with as much confidence :') and dream lovers out there i am not bashing your choice or even your headcanons #to each their own but i really wanna hear someone be passionate about him in my feed or askbox like TELL me about him #i've seen ink rants out there that are FIRE like so true!!! but where's the dream defense team???#maybe it's just me tho :') btw i still like cream but not the same way as before if i'm being real #it feels the same...all of it and it makes me wanna bite something ARGHGG #i know i know i ship some stuff that's basic too hhh but dream and cross are always written the same and dream is too innocent #and nightmare is too weird in some of these fics like if MY brother ever tried to literally attack my hypothetical partner????#i wouldn't give him the :'((( sad face and weakly tell him to 'please stop...you're hurting him'' like NO girl they're TWINS #they're the same age i would tell him to BACK off and not insert himself in my love life after years of ignoring and fighting LIKE #especially since most of the time cross is actually good to dream and all- so he doesn't have a good reason to disrupt his bro's dates #UGH i just have so many opinions but basically i would love him a lot lot more than i do now if they also let him be more flexible #and shake things up like with shattered and stuff! gimme alternate versions of him even if it's too ooc like we do for all the other sanses #jaa i am SO sorry you had to read all that dude thank you so much for passing by :'D

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