There's something so beautiful about being heard. It leaves people with the experience that they matter and that they're valued.
I really do believe that listening is the highest form of loving.
~ Terces Engelhart
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I am incredibly grateful for the men of quality in my life, who do the work, show up with a willingness to be authentic, vulnerable, and growth-oriented.
They have so much to teach and give to the world and are often not aware of their radiance and importance. None of them are perfect, as none of us can ever be. And they have the courage to venture on the journey of self exploration, they dare to face their inner demons and deities, to meet their shadow in a dance of excellence and integration, with an expanding honesty and transparency with self and others, and the magnificent capacity to learn, grow, and laugh at it all with kin.
I see their struggles, the nobility of their hearts and souls, delight in the beauty of their inner child and brilliance of mind, and am awed by their becoming and unbecoming.
How blessed I am by the love, compassion, and embodied wisdom they bring to our connection?
There is a unique beauty to the dance of humans who meet on a ground of equality, especially so as dysfunctional gender narratives have be left in the dust to meet on the groundless ground of the unknown that takes us into novel and delicious dimensions of relating, co-creating, and being!
Of course there are many more men, who are deeply steeped in unconsciousness and patterns of harm of self and others, disinclined to awaken and invest in healthy relationships and conscious living. They sure have my compassion and I honor and celebrate all that tries to meet and support them in their healing.
Yet they no longer have a place at my table or in my circles of soul kin and community. I accept their existence and choices for their life path, knowing their essential part in the collective unfolding. Nonetheless, I choose to honor the insight that engaging with their dimensions of consciousness and lived reality no longer is part of my path and offers not enough value or growth.
And why on earth would I want to opt for anything less than the beauty way already present in my experience?
Why on earth engage the scarcity and distortion held, by way too many, as a shield to miss all goodness, joy, and play infinitely possible in every encounter and real meeting of beings?
And so I choose to bless the unaligned, from afar, training my awareness on who and what is harmoniously resonant with my energy and path.
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This sort of thing is quite common, although it may not be as glaringly obvious as in the example of Frank and Linda. Millions of people unconsciously participate in and support the destructive behavior of those whom they love. A more subtle version of this pattern is the relationship in which two people do not support each other's expression of their full potential. They let each other get away with being less than their best. There is no agreement between them that the relationship is going to be the catalyst for growth. There may be no overt self-destructiveness such as drinking, drugging, or overeating, but the pattern is basically the same. It is a conspiracy of mediocrity.
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sobbing into my plate after overhearing a conversation between a mom and her tiny daughter in this shopping centre food court
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I love how on Tumblr, "media literacy" has become "Um, just because someone writes about this doesn't mean they're endorsing this. I hate all these media puritans ruining everything."
I'm sad to inform you that knowing when and whether an author is endorsing something, implying something, saying something, is also part of media literacy. Knowing when they are doing this and when they're not is part of media literacy. Assuming that no author has ever endorsed a bad thing is how you fall for proper gander. It's not media literacy to always assume that nobody ever has agreed with the morally reprehensible ideas in their work.
Sometimes, authors are endorsing something, and you need to be aware when that happens, and you also need to be aware when you're doing it as an author. All media isn't horny dubcon fanfic where you and the author know it's problematic IRL but you get off to it in the privacy of your brain. Sometimes very smart people can convince you of something that'll hurt others in the real world. Sometimes very dumb people will romanticize something without realizing they're doing it and you'll be caught up in it without realizing that you are.
Being aware of this is also media literacy. Being aware of the narrative tools used to affect your thinking is media literacy. Deciding on your own whether you agree with an author or not is media literacy. Enjoying characters doing bad things and allowing authors to create flawed or cruel characters for the sake of a story is perfectly fine, but it is not the same as being media literate. Being smug about how you never think an author has bad intentions tells me you're edgy, not that you're media literate. You can't use one rule to apply to all media. That's not how media literacy works. Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Aheem heem. Anyway.
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lately instead for beating myself up or being down on myself (mainly at work when i miss of step of the process or do something wrong, often repeatedly) i instead encourage myself by saying “and that’s okay, next time i’ll do better, and even better the time after that” with the understanding that i’m only a person and as long as i’m doing my best that’s all that matters. that’s what my self-love feels like right now. i’m proud of me for doing my best to take care of my brain and making the best choices i can in a given moment. and when my brain isn’t wanting to work the way i need it to i aim to not be mean to myself. if avoidable i don’t try to force anything with my brain or push an issue just causing myself undue stress. it’s just a noncooperative brain day and that’s okay, it’s temporary and says nothing about my character. i’ve also tried to reach out for support more at work just by expressing how i’m doing on a given day and how my productivity might be affected and my managers have been super supportive of me c’:
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size kink + manhandling + rafe x shy!reader…. is a concept NO ONE will survive. i stand by my words.
babe this was such a delicious prompt. i fear not even i survived. this almost seems like their first time having sex i feel like she needs such a firm hand in the bedroom. yay! ♡
you glance up at your boyfriend, looking back down again quickly. you don't know how you ended up here, pressed against the door frame of his bedroom, your wrists trapped between rafe's hands, pushed flat against the surface.
rafe's pushed against you, so close that the only thing you can think about is the scent of his cologne. you eyes flutter shut when he moves, pressing his face against your hair, then against your cheek, pressing a hot kiss there. you squirm, wanting to get free, because it's too overwhelming. it's no use—rafe will chase you down even if you manage to run.
"eyes open. up here. look at me." it's a command, and ever-obedient, you comply, looking up though you can hear all the blood rushing into your ears, everything else going blank and fuzzy, the only thought left in your mind is the way your boyfriend's look at you right now, like you're prey that he's finally caught.
he lifts your wrists above your head, pinning them in place with one hand, the other coming down to your jaw, gripping your face tight while he leans in for another kiss. you feel boxed in, all senses flooded with nothing but rafe, and you sigh, cherishing the feeling.
"y'ready? hm?" you nod, but you know it's not enough. "let me hear it, then." you whine, but rafe tightens his grip.
"i'm ready for it, daddy." your eyes shut again, face feeling hot and skin aflame. "swear."
"good girl." you think he's gonna let you go, send you to get ready on his bed, but instead he picks you up just as quickly, throwing you over his shoulder. you let out a yelp, while he slaps your ass from his position. "c'mon, kid. said you're ready. m'not waiting any longer."
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more funny continuity things that I enjoy:
chromedome and alt modes.
also this, if it counts:
these are from issues #1, #9, #17, and #37
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