#but we must show a vivid impression

[freewriterevangeline]

.

The Yavesh Core is

basically a reflection of antediluvian times or Sodom and Gomorrah except there are perhaps a few more rules and order.... but the rules have nothing to do with morality, just efficiency for a nefarious purpose.

Of course, there is still good here, because of the victims, who manage to keep some love alive.

#adventures in odyssey #fanfiction #wip #generation spoilers #yavesh #which isnt even its real name #evil #love #if youre shocked by this #.. #it could be worse and in fact is #im just not describing all of it #but real ppl go thru sth similar. #horros of human imagination has no bounds when paired with evil #i donr evn want to think of all the possible things they may think of #but we must show a vivid impression #bc this is the milieu #the characters cant get out of

[repulsiveliquidation]

Want, not Need. Pt. 2 || The Orgy

warnings : smut 18+, fingering, strap-on, cunnilingus, anal play, semi-public sex.

a/n : Mapi is not injured and hobbling about in this series, thank you very much. That is also my favorite picture of those two.

Part One

“Her?” Ingrid asks, “Where did you meet her?”

Mapi begins to go into vivid detail about your one-night stand with Mapi. She gets into the nitty gritty and boy does it pique Ingrid’s interest.

“We met at the bar, she was standing there with the most perfect ass I had ever seen at the time. Yours tops that list now.” Mapi says, giving Ingrid a little tap on her behind. She grins and smacks her girlfriend, listening to her explain her little night with you.

“She took the big one, Ingrid,” Mapi tells her proudly. Ingrid knew what Mapi was talking about. Mapi had a toy that she still struggled to take. It sat in the back of Mapi’s nightstand, a mountain Ingrid still hadn’t been able to conquer. She was thoroughly impressed though, and by the sound of it, Mapi was too.

“I mean, I barely fingered her open and she took it like a champ.”

“She is fascinating.”

Ingrid looks over at you, eyes already hooded like a predator that has eyes on prey.

“And she just left you? No goodbye?” Ingrid asks as she stands. Mapi stands too and tucks a lock of the Norwegian hair behind her ear.

“Just a note, and the most delicious breakfast I had in all my time in Madrid,” Mapi tells Ingrid as she begins to walk over to you. Mapi suddenly grabs her arm, pulls her back, and gives her a chaste kiss, grinning from ear to ear.

“Work your magic, huh princesa? She owes me a round of drinks.”

Ingrid saunters over, a friendly smile on her face.

“Hello, you must be who Jonatan was raving about, our newest sports writer! Please, call me Ingrid.”

“Yes, it’s certainly a pleasure to meet you, Ingrid. Y/N.”

The camera starts rolling and the interview goes smoothly. Mapi tries to focus back on training but can’t, spending more time staring at you and Ingrid than going through her drills for the day. She notices that Ingrid is flirting with you a little and you give her the same attention. Mapi stands at the water station after training just as Ingrid’s interview wraps up, watching your hand rub up and down Ingrid’s arm.  

Mapi bites the bullet and walks over, hand wrapped around Ingrid’s waist. She pulls Ingrid in for a kiss and Ingrid melts; you stand there awkwardly and scratch the back of your head.

“Mapi, it’s nice to meet you again,” you say, extending your hand out for her to shake.

“What brings you to Barcelona?” Mapi asks, shaking your hand but pulling you in for a hug.

“Work! I used to write for Madrid then I got a job in America for a while before transferring here.”

“Well, since we know each other and you seem to be getting along with my girlfriend so well, we’ll show you around!” Mapi insists, linking your arms together.

“Wait, I-I wouldn’t want to impose!” You say and step back, ready to help the crew pack up and go back to your hotel room.

“Nonsense,” Ingrid says, reaching out for your arm. “Give Mapi a minute to clean up and we can head for dinner!” Ingrid links her arms with yours and walks ahead of Mapi, the shorter woman smirking at all the possibilities dinner could bring.

Throughout dinner, Mapi and Ingrid take turns teasing you. Whether it was under the table of the family-owned restaurant or being extra careful of you by ordering for you and pulling your chair out.

Ingrid insists on paying for dinner, even when you try to go over to the counter and make the teenager behind the counter take your card.

“You’re new to our home, let us take care of you,” she whispered, pressing a soft kiss to your ear before pulling you out the door.

Mapi takes your hand and drags you down the street to a private bar. You grin and walk in with Ingrid in tow, the loud music bringing back memories of that night you had with Mapi.

“Time to cash in on that promise, princesa. The first round is on you,” Mapi teases and tilts your head up to look at her at the bar, index finger tapping your nose. You buy drinks as promised, bringing them to both the girls who found a private corner of the bar to sit at. You sit at the end, sipping innocently on your minty gin. Mapi stands, downing her rum and coke in one swig before standing behind you. She caresses her hands down your arms, lips close to your ear.

“May I?” she asks softly. You nod, eyes locked onto Ingrid’s that are a similar dark-hooded shade. Mapi’s lips begin to kiss along your neck and shoulder, hands moving to your waist as she presses her front tight to your back.

“Come on, you must show Ingrid how well you move those hips hm?” Mapi encourages, helping you off the seat.

You follow them to the packed dancefloor, Ingrid instantly pulling you to her as Mapi stands behind her and holds her waist. In a split-second decision, you decide to let go and enjoy yourself. You dance with Ingrid and Mapi, the heat of the dancefloor bringing a light blush to all your faces. Ingrid, in a surprising turn of events, turns and begins to grind back on you despite only one drink.

You hesitate to touch her, eyes shooting up at Mapi who looks a little confused as to why you are still holding back. She suddenly pulls you into her and kisses you hard. You melt into her like Ingrid did earlier, the feeling of her lips on yours brings you back to her apartment where you last felt her. You pull away a little breathless, her lips just millimeters from yours.

“Don’t keep her waiting, pretty girl.”

You nod softly and pull Ingrid close, the tall Norwegian goes back to grinding on you. She’s a little buzzed, hips moving back on you beautifully. You too grab her hips and dance along with her, looking up to see Ingrid and Mapi making out lovingly.

You begin to kiss down Ingrid’s bare shoulder, nipping at her flesh to leave deep teeth marks. Your hands don’t stop caressing her, the two of them now noisily kissing each other when Ingrid pulls away with a loud smack.

“Need you,” she says to Mapi before she turns to you shaking her head, “No, want you.”

This time you take charge and pull them towards the private bathrooms at the end of the room. Ingrid was all over you the moment the door locked, eagerly on her knees while Mapi grabbed your face to kiss you. Ingrid pulled your jeans down, happily settled between your legs as she began to lap hungrily at your pussy.

Mapi kept your moans to a minimum, kissing you hard with her hand wrapped around your neck lightly. One hand held Ingrid’s head close, the other tangled in Mapi’s messy hair. She began to kiss down your neck, the music in the club becoming louder which gave you a bit of confidence to moan freely. Ingrid held your legs steady, tongue flicking over your clit fast and hard. Mapi pulled your shirt up and began to suck on your breasts hard. You moaned loudly without a care in the world, the feeling of one of them was the best fuck of your life and now to have the two of them take care of you was a dream come true.

Ingrid sucked hard on your clit, two long fingers slipping into your pussy before you felt Mapi’s lips leave your chest. Before you could open your eyes, she spanked your ass.  

“Quédate quieto.”

You nod and listen, feeling her move around as your hips begin to almost ride Ingrid’s fingers. You feel her hands pull at your ass, tongue flat and warm against your second hole. You yelp and ride the sensations; Ingrid’s lips wrapped tight around your clit, her fingers pressed deep inside you, and Mapi’s tongue jabbing its way into your ass.

“Fuck…” you moan, hand reaching back to hold Mapi’s head closer as Ingrid’s fingers press harder against your sweet spot. You hunch over, pulling on Ingrid’s hair but she relents, sucking harder and harder on your clit.  

“Ingrid, fuck…I’m close!” you squeak, thighs quivering as she slips a third finger inside your pussy. Mapi takes a bite of your ass and stands, holding you close and looking down over your shoulder at Ingrid at your feet.

“Seems familiar doesn’t it, pretty girl? She looks so gorgeous on her knees where she belongs no?”

Your eyes roll into your head when you remember her voice having the same lilt it had now when she said the same thing to you.

“Y-Yes! Fuck please, yes!”

Ingrid gives you one last come-hither flick inside you and you crash, thighs trembling as your orgasm ripples through you.

Mapi catches you and lets you crumble to the floor. You grab Ingrid’s face and kiss her passionately, moaning into her mouth when the taste of you floods your senses.

“Please take me home,” you beg, turning to look at a smug Mapi. She looks put together, and not someone who just ate your ass and pushed you toward a knee-buckling orgasm.

“You girls clean up, I’ll bring the car to the front.”

You sit in the back of the car with Ingrid, her lips on yours the whole short drive home.

“You’re right Mapi,” Ingrid starts, fingertips dancing over your features. “She is pretty.”

Mapi grins and winks at you in the rear-view mirror, before Ingrid turns your head back to look at her.

“Eyes on me, elskling,” she demands, not sounding as menacing as she wants. You raise your eyebrow at her and Mapi starts to laugh, parking the car and getting out.

Ingrid huffs and marches into the building herself, Mapi stops you before you can walk in.

“She’s a brat sometimes,” Mapi starts, hands in her pocket looking as cool as a cucumber.

“I can see that.”  

“She’s been acting up lately, I think someone else being in charge should get her to behave.”

“You want me to”

“Just for a bit, while I watch of course,” she presses the button for the lift and you take a deep breath, there is a lingering hint of Ingrid’s perfume in the air. She must be upstairs already.

“Brat taming was not how I envisioned my evening going.”

“Surprised?”

“Tickled.”

 Walking into Mapi and Ingrid’s beautiful apartment, she takes your hand and gently guides you to the bedroom where Ingrid lays naked on the bed spread eagle with her fingers plunged deep into her pussy.

You and Mapi stand over her, arms crossed in unison. Ingrid merely smiles and plays with her chest, her right hand busy between her legs.

“You were taking too long down there so I figured I’d sort myself out,” she whimpers, a third finger sliding into her wet pussy before she dramatically turns onto her knees and fingers herself that way. She moans into the mattress but stops when she doesn’t hear anyone berating her for being a brat.

Instead, she hears clothes falling to the ground, lips smacking softly and moans begging for more. She pulls her sticky fingers out of her pussy and turns back around, jaw dropped in shock when she sees you on your knees already sucking on Mapi’s strap.

She didn’t even notice Mapi grabbing it from the bedside drawer let alone giving you her spare one. You gag loudly and Ingrid takes notice of the silicone cock you’re sucking on; it’s the one she’s never been able to take.

“Good girl, princesa…” Mapi praises, running her fingers through your hair. She pulls a makeshift ponytail and fucks into your mouth, moaning loudly to put on a show for Ingrid. Ingrid shuffles over and pulls you away from Mapi, lips wrapped around Mapi’s cock. You both kneel in front of her, taking turns to suck her cock. She grins and goes with it, feeling the tension grow between you and Ingrid.

“On the bed, both of you,” Mapi says sternly, Ingrid scrambling onto the bed quickly. You follow her, stroking your cock which was much smaller than Mapi’s but was one that Ingrid took very easily.

Mapi pulled an office chair to the end of the bed, sitting back and relaxing. She lazily stroked her cock, before pointing at Ingrid.

“You will do as she says. Disobey her, you do not get my cock much less hers.”

Ingrid nods, looking at you and leaning in for a kiss. You kiss her back, slowly pushing her onto her back. Ingrid moves as you do, legs spread wide open like she did earlier. You kiss her messily, hands fondling her full breasts and supple skin.

“Mm, I’ve wanted to taste you since I saw you at Wolfsburg the first time.”

“You’ve waited that long, cariño?” Mapi asks in a bored tone, looking at her nails as she pulls a hangnail off.

“Sí, so long…” you whisper, sucking on Ingrid’s nipple. She whines and arches her back, hands pushing your hair out of your face as she squirms on the bed.

You kiss down her toned midfielder body, her abs prominent as she breathes heavier and heavier. You bite just over her hip, pressing her thighs wide open. You settle between her legs at the edge of the bed, tongue-mouthing eagerly at her sloppy folds.

“Fuck!” she moans, hands tangled in your hair as she tries to grind up into your mouth. You stop her and pin her down tighter, sucking harder at her clit as she begs for you to let her come.

“Already, Ingrid?” you tease, two fingers slipping into her easily.

“Yes…feels so good…” she begs, head thumping back on the mattress.

“Oh, I don’t own your orgasms, Ingrid. Mapi does, you should ask her,” you say amusedly, grinning at a smirking Mapi who leaned over with her elbows on her knees. You go back to fucking Ingrid, four fingers now deeply pressed into her open pussy as your lips suckle hard on her swollen clit.

“All you have to do is ask, mi amor,” Mapi teases, reaching over and tucking a loose strand of hair behind Ingrid’s ear. Her eyes fill with tears as the feeling of the stretch begins to course through her.

“Please, Mapi…” she whimpers, “I’ve been good.”

Mapi leans back into her menacing chair, hand on her chin like she’s thinking.

“Have you been good, Ingrid?” she asks, spinning around slowly. You’ve turned Ingrid onto her stomach, tongue lapping fast at her asshole as your fingers press up into her sweet spot. She grunts and begins to keen, lips begging Mapi to let her come.

“I don’t know, bebita. We’ve had a guest in our home and you’ve been a needy little slut the whole night. Should she come, princesa? Has our Norwegian whore been a good girl?”

“Hmm,” you begin, thumb circling over Ingrid’s clit as three fingers rub hard on her sweet spot. She’s trembling hard, fighting her impending orgasm the best she can.

“She did make me come in the club earlier, that was nice of her,” you say, kissing her belly button.

“She can come.”

Ingrid screams your name, back fully arching off the bed as the shocks course through her entire body. She pants hard and mutters a soft “Come here,” before capturing your lips in a tender kiss. You press your thigh between her legs and she cheekily grinds up into it, biting your lip.

Mapi stands and pulls you off her, wrenching open your jaw to spit into. It lands all over your mouth but in it before she leans in for a kiss. Ingrid reaches for the bottle of lube and spreads it all over Mapi’s cock, obediently awaiting more instructions.

Mapi gets on the bed behind Ingrid, kissing along her shoulder. You lean in and kiss her lips, caressing her thighs. The Norwegian can’t figure out who to focus on, her hands grabbing you to lace together.

Mapi pushes her forward, fingers rubbing tenderly over her folds. Ingrid becomes face to face with your cock, eagerly taking it in her mouth as Mapi slips her cock into Ingrid. She goes slow and adds more lube, knowing that Ingrid struggles to take this one.

To her surprise, Ingrid swallows it up with ease, moaning loudly around your cock as the thick silicone fills her aching pussy. Mapi thrusts slowly, getting her used to the stretch. Ingrid focuses on your cock, sucking on the much smaller appendage with practiced ease.

Mapi moans and reaches for you, leaning over Ingrid as her hips pound into her girlfriend. You cradle Ingrid’s head, leaning forward, and kiss Mapi. You hear Ingrid choke a couple of times, your hips gently nudging the toy down her throat. You pull away from Mapi and pull Ingrid off your cock, kissing her spit-soaked face.

“Fucking hell Ingrid, you’re such a whore for us huh? Love having two cocks fill your holes?”

“Not all my holes…” she says with a grin, a harsh smack on her ass resounding through the room.

“Basta, puta asquerosa,” Mapi looks up at you, hips never faltering even once. “Come here.”

You scoot over, grabbing the bottle of lube, knowing your next move before Mapi asks. She pulls out of Ingrid and helps her onto her side, two of your fingers slipping into her asshole. She whimpers, hips chasing the feeling eagerly.

“More, please,” she asks, knuckles white as she grips the sheets tight in pleasure.

You kiss along her side and ass, scissoring your fingers faster before pushing in a third. She grabs your wrist and guides your hand, your bicep cramping as you finger her asshole open enough to take your cock and Mapi’s at the same time.

“I can! Just hurry, please!” She squeals, hiking her leg up to her chest as Mapi adds more lube to her cock and yours. She slips in first, rubbing Ingrid’s thigh as you line yourself up with Ingrid’s ass.

You slip in and Ingrid moans long and loud, feeling overwhelmingly full and buzzed. You lean down and kiss her softly, the center-back smiling softly before nodding for you to move. Mapi starts slow, thrusting into her girlfriend before urging you to thrust on her upstroke. You alternate like a smooth machine, Ingrid babbling nonsense as raw pleasure surges through her petite body.

“Faster!” she screams, hips moving back on you and Mapi. You spank her ass and beckon your hips faster, kissing Mapi passionately as she also fucks into Ingrid faster.

The Norwegian comes with a scream of both your names, the sheer force of the orgasm pushing you both out of her as she quivers and squirms. You’re both beside her in an instant, straps abandoned somewhere in the room.

Ingrid smiles drunkenly, one hand cradling Mapi’s head behind her and the other petting your abs.

“I think I went to heaven,” she slurs before looking at you. “I wanted you too, you know. I saw you at the final against Lyon. Was too shy to say hi, but it was worth the wait.”  

#mapi leon #ingrid engen #mapi león x ingrid engen #mapi leon x ingrid engen x reader #mapi león x reader #ingrid engen x reader #woso smut #woso x reader #woso soccer #woso fanfics #fc barca femeni #woso imagines #mapi leon smut #ingrid engen smut

[novlr]

Is it bad that I can't think of descriptive words and phrases at the top of my head when I'm writing? I've always heard that the first draft isn't necessarily the best and you can go back later to fix it but I always feel bad when I can't think of better adjectives/adverbs/etc to use right away.

As creative writers, we are all enticed by the allure of rich vocabulary and fancy language. The prospect of constructing a sentence that shimmers with complex and sophisticated words is nothing short of enchanting. However, when it comes to effective communication, clarity is more important than the vocabulary you use, especially for your first draft.

Why vocabulary is important (and when it isn’t)

From an early age we’re told to improve our vocabularies to make our writing more interesting. And advice like “show, don’t tell” feeds into this. While descriptive writing is great, and I do recommend improving your vocabulary in ways that serve your craft, many writers make the mistake of using unnecessary adjectives because they think it will make their writing better. This simply isn’t the case. It can lead you to use words that aren’t well-known or too complex for the average reader. There exists a pressure to impress with language, but writers must beware of sacrificing understanding for the illusion sophistication. It’s always better to be clear than fancy.

The pitfalls of overcomplicated language

The risk of alienating readers is real. Many might not comprehend convoluted sentences, causing them to lose interest. If you can’t immediately think of an alternative adjective or description, then it likely wouldn’t have come to your readers either. Overcomplicated language can also lead to miscommunication and misunderstanding, which defeats the purpose of storytelling. The distraction of convoluted prose can lead readers away from the plot and the message that you are trying to convey. It’s how you end up with messy descriptions like “sapphire orbs” instead of just saying “blue eyes” which is both clearer and better to read.

Clarity is the essence of creative writing

The primary goal of creative writing is storytelling and connection. It aims to elicit emotions and transport readers to another world. Balancing language and storytelling is crucial in order to achieve this. While rich language can enhance the story, it should not become the story itself. Simplicity in language is often better at conveying complex ideas, ensuring that the message gets across most effectively. If your story is good, it will stand on its own, regardless of how extensive your vocabulary is.

The power of clarity

Clarity in creative writing means expressing ideas in a simple, concise, and coherent manner. It enhances reader engagement, as readers can focus on the plot and characters rather than struggling to understand the language. Vivid and concise descriptions contribute to clear writing, as they bring the story to life without any unnecessary complexity. A description can still be vivid without being complex. All you really want your language to do is effectively portray context.

Balancing vocabulary and clarity

There’s certainly a place for a rich vocabulary in creative writing, to paint vivid pictures and evoke strong emotions. The key is to use the right word at the right time, and not to shoehorn in complex words for the sake of it. For your first draft, you should always focus on telling a good story, and not worry too much about the details of vocabulary. And while you do that, use techniques to expand your vocabulary like those outlined in this post, to help improve your language skills and achieve the right balance between clarity and complexity!

#writeblr #vocabulary #writers #creative writing #writing #writing community #writers of tumblr #creative writers #writing inspiration #writerblr #writing tips #writblr #writers corner #writing advice #writing resources #writers on tumblr #writers and poets #writer #helping writers #writing help #help for writers #advice for authors #improve your vocabulary #resources for writers #let's write #writers block #beat writers block #writer things #tips for writers #writing tips and tricks

[cosmicjoke]

Levi's Gratitude as Proof of His Innate Goodness

I was talking about this on another post with someone, but it's something important that I wanted to bring up on my own blog, too, as a separate thing.

I think Levi’s memory of his mother is vague, at best. I brought this up in my analysis post of "Bad Boy" as well.

When recalling his memory of Kuchel, Levi talks about how he thought, against the filth and rotten air of the Underground, his mother's "elegant posture" stood out all the more.

He says, specifically, "I was born in the Underground, and have only ever seen things that are Underground. So I thought... It's hopelessly dirty here. Even the air here is rotten. The more I realize this, the more I feel that mother's posture is so elegant."

And we see a panel showing only a partial image of Kuchel's face. We never see a fully realized image of her.

Levi then says on the next page, “That’s all I remember clearly”, referring to her elegance.

This story is told entirely from Levi's perspective, so I think it's plain from us never getting a full picture of Kuchel's face, and from what Levi says about her elegance being the only thing he "remembers clearly", that he doesn't have a solid or vivid recollection of her.

I think he was probably too young when she died to have any clear or solid memory of her. He likely doesn't remember what she actually looked like at all, really. All he’s left with, then, is the impression of her elegance against the backdrop of filth and rottenness he was surrounded by growing up. And I think he probably only remembers that elegance because of how sharply it contrasted with everything else in his life. That’s also why we see him fixate on it so much.

And it serves to truly highlight just how deprived Levi was of anything good in his life, that something so vague and even intangible became so meaningful to him, almost to the point of obsession.

He literally had no other anchor point of positivity, no experience or memory of anything good, than this hazy and uncertain impression of his mother’s beauty. That truly is heartbreaking, and it only serves to highlight further how extraordinary it is that Levi turned out to be such a good man.

Because the fact that Levi is so grateful for even that single moment of fleeting good in his life, a moment he barely even remembers, shows his own, innate goodness and the extraordinary strength of his character.

Most people would be bitter and resentful at having so little, (take, for example, Zeke), and even want to lash out at the world by making others suffer in the same ways they did, or take from others to fill the void of their own deprivation, but Levi instead cherished this one, good thing he had, and tried so hard to hold onto it, and preserve it. He appreciated it endlessly, and never lost that appreciation, no matter how bad his life got, no matter how horrible everything else was, how bleak and worthless his existence must have seemed, or how profound his loneliness.

I think that's a testament to Levi's innate goodness, to his innate kindness, that he holds such gratitude for something so small, especially in the face of the deluge of misery that was the rest of his life, and how he tries in turn to give people more than he had, to actively prevent them from suffering in the same ways he did, even to the point of sacrificing his own comfort for others, as in the case of him giving Petra's badge to Dieter, or rescuing Ramzi from that crowd in Marley, letting the kid have his own spending money, or holding that dying soldier's hand, even as Levi couldn't stand the feel of blood on his skin, just to comfort him in his last moments. I think we see Levi's gratitude for even the smallest kindnesses reflected, also, in the way he always goes out of his way to express his gratitude to others, always thanking his comrades for their efforts, always making sure to let them know that their efforts matter and are important. Like when he thanks Nifa for riding all night to bring him Erwin's instructions, or when he thanks Eren for saving them all in the underground cavern beneath Rod Reiss' estate, and tells Eren that it's thanks to him they can retake Wall Maria. Or when he tells Erwin that it isn't him he should be thanking for helping to capture the Female Titan, but all the soldiers who died in the effort.

It takes an extraordinary strength of character not to let the emotional devastation of his upbringing and life overwhelm him, and to still have the strength and desire to want to help others, when I'm certain there were times when Levi just wanted to lay down and die. Or when he wanted to hide away and protect himself from any more hurt or loss. That's why I always talk about how selfless Levi is. Even when he knows it's going to bring him more pain, he still does all he can to try and help others. He's never able to stay detached from people, or remain unaffected by the pain or loss of others, even as he tries to keep his distance, because he just cares too much, he has too much compassion and empathy in his heart, and too much generosity, even for people he doesn't really know.

I just think it's extraordinary how grateful Levi is for something that, for so many, would seem so insignificant and insubstantial, especially if they had lived a life as hard as Levi's own, or had experienced even half as much deprivation and despair as he had. I think it's proof of the fact that Levi was born with a good and generous heart. That he's an innately good person.

#Levi Ackerman #Bad Boy #bad boy spoilers #attack on titan #shingkei no kyojin #analysis #commentary #meta

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Comte Drama CD Translations, Track Four: A Gentlemanly Escort

Once again folks, I am not a professional don't try this at home, these are just my rough transcriptions of each track in the CD because I need fodder for my simping. More beneath the cut, since most of these are pretty long, don't wanna clog anyone's dash:

So after Comte and MC go shopping for a dress, they leave for the party they're attending that night. This track begins with their arrival to the venue.

Every time we arrive at a ball together, it makes me remember when we stepped into your debutante side by side. There’s no need to thank me. …You were the one who dared to enter a new world, and that boldness attracted the people around you. All I did was lend a helping hand. …But I did enjoy decorating you with my own hands, styling your hair beautifully. The excitement I felt that night is still fresh in my heart… I was a little jealous when the eyes of the men all around you would linger, my dear. Come a little closer, I’d like to ward off their gazes. It’s best to show that you belong to me like this.

The way I went from awwww to clutches pearls lustfully 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 he is just the perfect mix of "that's adorable" and "oh. i like that--"

It’s time to dance. (When you listen to the audio he literally says: "HO? DANCE TIME" I'M DYING) My lady (OJOU-SAN!!!!!!), would you do me the honor of your hand…and join me for this dance? Come now, surrender yourself to an exciting and sweet night Beneath a dazzling chandelier, hands enfolded like this… Tucking our hips together, eyes on each other, stepping to the rhythm of the music, …my heart is always racing at times like these. (AWWWWWWWW)

I swear this man invented romance, what a smooth criminal. Although I can't lie, I love when he's charming 🥰 (I just love his honest self even more!)

Now, listen carefully to the waltz triplet/triple time… Un, deux, trois, un, deux, trois…on the first turn, turn right Yes…you executed that turn beautifully You seemed a lot more relaxed, spine straight. You did just as I taught you. Since we’re on the topic of dancing, men’s roles are often compared to frames. As a pair, they’re termed the Flower and the Frame The insinuation is that a man must lead a woman, who is the “flower” in order to make her movements shine as brightly as possible. So right now…my mission is to make you bloom the most beautifully on this dance floor. …I don’t think you have anything to worry about. You shine more beautifully than anyone else.

I love this bit just because I was like "lore. IS THAT LORE???? WOOOOOO GIMME THE L O R E" but also incredibly interesting when it comes to gender roles and Comte. Only because a lot of his content manifests at this fascinating crossroads: he's been raised under these sorts of conventions so, on some level, he acts on them without thinking. He also lives under the current impression that that's what people expect from him in the present to gain their approval. Yet, how he actually conceives of a significant other and how he is in private make for a disconnect by comparison.

(If I'm not being perceived, do I exist? Is honestly the uncharted territory that's saturated with so much intrigue for me when it comes to Comte)

Because when he feels comfortable being himself in more private settings/moments he calls MC his "life partner" (and is very adamant about regarding her in equal terms), and he tends to be the more relationally/socially/emotionally savvy of the two (which are qualities often relegated to women). I think I particularly enjoy the way he tries so hard to cultivate a working image of "a proper man" because he's just so accustomed to it for survival; he's doing it on a level of awareness and unawareness, all while believing something entirely different. It makes for such a vivid character study, a very realistic intersection of lived experiences and unspoken feelings.

Also. "You shine more beautifully than anyone else." stares into the distance with so many feelings. I just have such a fondness for the way he can be so silly and so smooth, but in the depths of his heart he's so truly in love. tackles him

Oh, the next turn is a bit tricky, so be careful. I’ll give you the signal…un, deux, trois, now, to the left… Yes, that’s it~ (HE’S HAVING FUN SOBS) My goodness…have you gotten so good at dancing I can hardly recognize you? Compared to when we first started, you don’t look away shyly as much as you used to. Every time I dance with you, I can see how much you improve Ah…I’m sure we’ve practiced quite a bit at home, but more than that, it’s the result of your endless effort.

I thought it was cute to see some of MC's growth here c: he's sweet to compliment her~

I would be honored…if you were trying to get better for the sake of dancing with me. I really enjoy dancing with you, too. When you’re in my arms, it makes my heart flutter to see you moving as smoothly as a bird flapping its wings. And every time our eyes meet, my heart tightens so sweetly in my chest. …None of my childhood tutors ever told me that dancing with someone else could feel this way. (HE SEEMS????? SO GENUINELY CONFUSED?????? TEARS IN MY EYES BABY NO) You’re the one who taught me the most important part about dancing Thank you

Aight but this was the part that hit me straight in the kokoro. So many things here I want to touch on (other than him ofc)

The way he seems so...genuinely, almost demure? In that first line? So 👉👈 about her trying to keep pace with him, trying to meet him halfway. It's even sweeter to me considering it's something that he really enjoys, so the idea that MC would want to learn because she wants to share it with him and make it more fun for him is so 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 (personally I love dancing so this is a hard mood). Ig I'm so softe for how he's like 'not that that has to be the reason, but if it was I would be so happy.' (of course it's for you king, everything I do is for you because you're the sweetest 😚💜💜💜💜💜💜💜)

The way?????? He describes her enjoying herself??????? I. I'm not really sure if it's something specific to me, but I found it really moving. I don't know if it's the fact that he appreciates how much effort she puts into things, or this implicit like...recognition of her as her own person?? It's a little funny, it's going back to that contradictory idea I mentioned a bit ago. He's operating within the conceptualization of "the Flower and the Frame" but he's taken the conventional meaning and expanded/changed it, in a way. While he does recognize his role in it, part of it is operating more in line with the real parts of his personality: he thinks people who are talented and try hard at things are beautiful, and he likes to support them however he can. (There is an implication here that he assumes he's not special in quite the same way which makes me 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 pls Comte, I think a considerate and mindful person is just as wonderful)

And then that last part. Like. Do you ever just want to stick your head into a volcano because that's where I'm at ladies and gentlemen. The absolute heartache????? The agony inside me, the way he seems so earnestly surprised that one of the few things he did enjoy could feel even better, that it could take on an entirely new meaning. That, where it was once a way to pass the time or entertain people, now it has become something charged with so much love. The way a relationship is being deeply in tune with someone, and how dancing together can bring out the full potential/another permutation of that building synergy. The way, for lack of better phrasing, he falls in love with her a little more each time they dance together. (JUST BURY ME IN THE BACKYARD AIN'T NOBODY GONNA LOVE ME LIKE THIS)

The little sincere "thank you" at the end, the very real gratitude to be able to experience that. That she would gift him that. GOD I AM SO UNWELL, RICH BOY STOP DOING THIS TO ME!!!!! "A heart is a heavy burden" ass mf 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I'm sorry I'm just that meme where I'm carrying him away from all those purebloods/aristocrats that make him feel like life is just one elongated and tiresome performance. Let me love him Crybird I'm fragile

…that went by so quickly. (IM YELLING HE’S SAD ITS OVER) Dancing with you is so much fun I find time just gets away from me all together. Well, let’s take to the floor again later and enjoy a little break for now. Are you thirsty? …Then I’ll get us some champagne, so please wait here. ---

And now we interrupt Minnie's sappy pining with a champagne break, we'll be back shortly.

Although man, he's like a little kid when he gets to dance--it's so cute??? The way he gets so excited, the way he's so clearly sad it's over despite this probably being like the hundredth time.

The implications. How he mentions that an eternity seems insurmountably long (and even after he runs the mansion, he felt that way), but dancing with her makes "time get away from [him]." What if I disappeared mysteriously into the ocean never to be see again

And his consideration for her, taking a break even though he could probably go for another song 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Sorry for the wait…Oh, who might this be? ("O Y A?" OMFG THE WAY HE’S LIKE 'bicc. Who u.' CRYING HIS TONE CHANGES SO FAST) …I see. Alas, she is my lover. I’m sorry, but could you give up on seeking her for a dance? Tonight is a special night, and I don’t intend to share her with anyone. It seems I can’t take my eyes off you for a single moment, that you were propositioned while I was only a few steps away. (Comte: NO TALK MC I'M A N G Y) I shouldn’t have let you go for a moment, even when the song was over.

…I don’t mind if you find it overprotective. I have no intention of concealing my possessiveness towards you. I won’t let it go like I used to. I decided to be more direct about my feelings when we agreed to be together. No matter who it is, I intend to proudly claim you as my lover. (O//O) …More, come closer. There is still another man interested in you. I’m in trouble if I don’t protect my beautiful lover from the likes of these opportunists.

Comte possessive and jealous makes brain go brrrrr, I regret to inform you all that--[obnoxiously loud Windows error sound]. Honestly it's hot every time I got nothing more to add, horny longing, awooga noises, be still my beating [redacted] etc.

…I think I’m full of contradictions. (LAUGHS AT HIMSELF BUT ALSO MURDER) I want to show off my beautiful lover, but I also don’t want anyone else to look at you. And when I look at you, my heart is at war between reason and instinct. …It takes everything I have just to hold back. …Is it repulsive/do you regret us now? I wouldn’t hold it against you if you said something like that. Then…shall we take our leave for some time alone? I’m not joking, I’m entirely serious. I always want you…

First of all Comte, contradiction is my kink (apparently?????? I am The Bearer of the Curse) so write that down. Second of all--

I love MC having the same brainrot as Comte stans of like 'oh no you being just a smidge yan is actually ungodly sexy and exactly what I signed up for, so dw about it 👍🏼.' I applaud Crybird for giving the people what they want. Although it makes me a little sad when he thinks he's too much/needy, I always want to pat him 🥺💜 I know who I married Comte CMERE

Also it will never stop being funny to me the way he's deadass that meme of the dog with the tennis ball/frisbee. It's hilarious every single time. Comte is seriously out here like:

Comte: Meet MC? Meet my lovely wife whom I cherish and is beautiful in every way conceivably possible?

Person: I like her too

Comte: NO TAKE ONLY PERCEIVE!!!! NO PERCEIVE ONLY SCRAM!!!!!!

Like this is peak comedy 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I really do love how much Crybird has fun with the purebloods in the sense that they can be so mature but also a bit childish??? He's so adorably petulant and petty in these moments it's hard not to coo.

Also the way he always wants her like he hasn't seen her in 17 years every single time. I LOVE THE UNADULTERATED AND UNMITIGATED YEARNING!!!!!!!!!!!! I ALWAYS WILL!!!!!!!

Aight that's it for this CD track, but the upcoming one is the hank pank. Until next time everyone, hope you enjoyed this ???th installment of Minnie's Brainrot Hours.

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp comte #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp mc #not incorrect quotes #drama cd translation #**lies down on the floor** #do you ever just have so many feelings....... #i'd give my left kidney to dance with him just ONCE #'do you regret marrying me?' #comte if you ask me one more time i will not be held responsible for my actions #narrator voice: actions include “jumping him every waking moment and babying him” #“and/or redacted whatever the mood brings in the moment im not stingy” #but at the same time #**holds him gently in my arms** its okay gorgeous your vibes are immaculate and your companionship is invaluable #there's no one else but you for me

[minaramen]

Ryunosuke Tsunashi - 16 Idol Album - Part 3: Strength to protect

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

[Disclaimer: I’m NOT a professional translator. I’m using my knowledge from 4 years of university. Please, feel free to let me know if you notice  mistranslation/typo/error of any kind]

Ryunosuke: The first time I held Soutaro is still vivid in my mind

Ryunosuke: He was so small, and still I was afraid I couldn’t hold his little weight as firmly as I was supposed to… I loved his tiny hand, holding my finger with all its strength

Ryunosuke: And I couldn’t help thinking… so, now I am this little guy’s big brother… I have to protect him, I have to become strong… and thinking like this gave me courage

Ryunosuke: Of course, I do remember feeling the same for Kouno and Kota as well, but Soutaro represents the first time I actually realized I'd become a big brother. That’s why the one I told you is a special memory to me

Tenn: This is very much like you, Ryuu. Becoming strong not for yourself, but to protect somebody else

Gaku: Yeah. You’re kind and warm, and at the same time you’re strong and powerful. These roots of yours are thanks to your father, right?

Ryunosuke: Yeah. Whenever something happens he laughs it off and says everything is alright, and then he secretly takes everything on his shoulders. He’s such a kind, strong, cool dad!

Tenn: I still haven't had the honor to meet him in person, but looking at you I can tell he’s a wonderful father 

Gaku: One must be a great man to raise a great son like you, Ryuu!

Ryunosuke: Ahah, thank you! It’s not about me, and still I feel happy to hear this from the two of you!

Gaku: Tell us more about your father!

Ryunosuke: Let’s see…actually, I never had the impression I looked like him much, but recently I kind of changed my mind

Tenn: What do you mean?

Ryunosuke: For example, we both cry pretty often. Soutaro did tell me I resemble him before, but now I realize it’s actually true…

Gaku: Ahah! You’re both soft-hearted, then! That’s pretty nice!

Tenn: Yes. I can’t think of an unemotional Ryuu

Ryunosuke: Y-yes, but maybe I’m a little too sentimental…

Gaku: That’s why I like you

Tenn: You’re both men who go straight to the point, mh?

Ryunosuke:...thank you…I wonder if we get more similar as I get older…

Gaku: I bet it works like that for all those who share the same blood. Even though I used to think that I would never become like my father

Tenn: And you think you do, now?

Gaku: It’s pretty weird to say it myself, but maybe the fact that once we decide on something, we both stand by our belief…?

Ryunosuke: You’re really a fighter, Gaku! And I find this side of yours amazing. You inherited it from the president, then!

Gaku: However, back then…I used to be pissed off at such a father

Tenn: You're honest with your feelings, both good and bad. They immediately show on your face, like an open book. That’s what you inherited from the president

Gaku: Well, I didn’t  think we were that similar, though!?

Ryunosuke. W-well, I don’t think there's anything wrong with becoming more and more similar to each other…it may help you understand the other better!

Gaku: Shit, it’s complicated…

Gaku: How about you, Tenn? How was Mr. Nanase as a father?

Tenn: …I don't know. I haven’t seen him for a long time so I can’t really say, but I guess he also used to stare at shows like I do now

Tenn: He was so focused on shows that he couldn’t even hear our voices if we talked to him 

Ryunosuke: I see… when you look at a live show DVD there is some kind of atmosphere suggesting we don't talk, indeed. It’s something you inherited from your father, then 

Gaku: He must have been really devoted to work

Tenn: Yes. To the point I already understood that when I was a kid

Ryunosuke: Blood ties are really strong, aren’t they? Soutaro is also becoming very reliable, just like dad…

Gaku: Have you heard from your brothers lately?

Ryunosuke: Yeah! We had a phone call just yesterday! They told me they watched the music program we appeared in!

Tenn: I’m happy to hear that. They’re bright, honest boys

Ryunosuke: Yes! From my perspective as a big brother they’re amazing men already. And still, being told by such an enthusiastic Soutaro how cool I am when I work as a member of Trigger made me feel happy

Gaku: Hey, you’re always cool

Ryunosuke: Thanks! You too, Gaku!

Ryunosuke: But praising me wasn’t the only thing he did. During the conversation I heard him telling Kouno and Kota things like “Get in the bath!” or “Clean it up!” He was really acting like a big brother

Ryunosuke: I was touched, because I understood that Soutaro is…really becoming a man

Tenn: Soutaro kun is a cheerful boy, of course, but he also gives the impression of being very serious. When he came to our dressing rooms, he greeted us very politely

Gaku: Yeah! Despite being so young, he said something like “Please, keep on taking care of my brother!” You could immediately tell he had little brothers himself

Ryunosuke: He told me he did his best because he wanted to make a good impression on both of you. But, yes…he was able to bring our little brothers to Tokyo and also greet you in the best way

Ryunosuke: …it seems only yesterday that he was just a baby…

Gaku: My grandma told me the very same thing many times lately. So, is it a thing?

Ryunosuke: It’s a little bit of an exaggeration, but yes, I mean… just recently he was calling me “nini” and following me holding my hand

Gaku: I don’t think that happened recently,  though! Right, Tenn?

Tenn: I understand what you mean, Ryuu

Ryunosuke: I was sure!

Gaku: Ah, I forgot he also has a brother complex…

Ryunosuke: Actually…I’m happy he manages to do everything even if I’m not there, but at the same time it gives me a melancholic feeling… just a bit…

Gaku: What are you saying? The fact you have such a good brother is because he followed your example

Tenn: I would like to thank him for leading us his great big brother…

Ryunosuke: Gaku…Tenn…

Gaku: You said “someone like me” a lot.  So I’ll tell you again

Gaku: As sure as hell, there were many days when TRIGGER would’ve ended if you weren’t there. You’ve always been the one who kept us together

Tenn: I know that the Ryuu we know is the way he is thanks to Soutaro kun, your other little brothers and your father

Tenn: However, I feel like we have a connection stronger than blood

Ryunosuke:.....ahah… no way… my brothers always tell me I’m a crybaby…

Gaku: There’s nothing wrong with being a crybaby

Tenn: We are glad to be touched by your tender tears

Ryunosuke: Thank you. My family always inspires me, and the two of you are included in it

Ryunosuke: I’ll always do my best to be a cool big brother to you as well. I’ll always do my best to be strong enough to reassure you, no matter what happens

Ryunosuke: I want to keep on being honest with myself. I want to step on the ground with all my strength and keep on moving forward

The end

TLnotes: Next up: Momo’s 16 Idol Album

#ryuunosuke tsunashi #ryunosuke tsunashi #trigger #16 idol album #gaku yaotome #tenn kujo

[penig]

I’m not a big horror fan, so though I was thoroughly impressed when I read Dracula in, um, 1981 I think, I have never reread it. Forty years is long enough to retain the broad outlines of plot and characterization while forgetting most salient details apart from a couple of vivid mental images and the memory of emotional reactions with or without the context.

So yesterday, though I thought I remembered Lucy getting blood from all three of her suitors, I was ready to believe that I’d misremembered and she didn’t get any from Quincy before her trainwreck of a horrible death. So today I got up braced to read Seward’s devastated diary entry and frantic cable to Arthur. Instead I got the black-comedy-relief of the cockney zookeeper, Dracula talking to wolves (who don’t like him but must obey him), and poor Bersicker, who can’t even get his name spelled right during his 15 minutes of fame, coming home with glass in his fur and I think, Ah, Jack’s so devastated he can’t write about it. Stll, there ought to be a telegram.

And then, then along comes the second e-mail with the thing I was expecting and she’s still barely alive and Quincy shows up to bleed for her after all and somehow it’s even worse.

Because the single most vivid image I retain from forty years ago is implacably approaching like Sir Lancelot charging a wedding feast and I thought it was on top of us but no, we have to suffer the suspense of despair stretched out by  hope some more!

While I’m at it, RIP, Mrs. Westenra. Who probably was manipulated by Dracula into removing the garlic and more people should realize that.

#dracula daily #Lucy #mrs westenra

[libralita]

Theories on Trell based on the Preview Chapters

Okay, so instead of doing work, I decided to stay up late rereading the preview chapters for The Lost Metal to get an idea of what Brandon is setting up and I think I've come with a solid idea of what's going on here. And also how does Kelsier play into this.

In Alloy of Law, when Miles is executed he says, “You are fools! One day, the men of gold and red, bearers of the final metal, will come to you. And you will be ruled by them.”

This very much screams to me that he is talking about the people of Roshar. In Rhythm of War when Kaladin is killing the Pursuer, his eyes glow gold and the obvious glowing red association. The final metal could be a reference to shardplate.

~

Now, in chapter 8 we get more hints about what's happening with Trell. So first the cycle says that Trell has wanted Marasi in particular because, "Trell is choosing hosts. Avatars, bestowed with his power. How would you like to be the accomplishment that proves I'm worthy of immortality, lawwoman? All you have to do is die." So, for some reason Trell has a particular interest in Marasi. It also sounds like she would be killed in order to create hemalurgic spikes because of her allomancy. The pronouns are also interesting Autonomy has been referred to by 'they' pronouns.

Then when the Cycle dies, his eyes glow vivid red and in a strangely grating voice he says: "The ash comes again. The world will fall to it. You will get what you deserve, and all will wither beneath a cloud of blackness and a blanket of burned bodies made of ash. Your end-Your end comes. Either in ash, or at the hands of the men of gold and red. Gold and--"

Now, my Trell=Odium theory has been under the assumption that Trell is the god of the men of gold and red. However this reads to me as saying unless you follow Trell either the ash will return or you will be subjugated by men of gold and red. The men of red and gold are an outside threat.

~

Next, in chapter 15 we get the note.

“‘A note recovered from the site of your engagement with the Set,’ Vendell said. ‘LeeMar recovered it before the other investigating constables could notice.’ … ‘[The note] was in one of the boxes in the cavern,’ Vendell explained. ‘One of the few that weren’t destroyed in the explosions.’ ‘During the mission earlier,’ Marasi said, ‘I spotted a masked figure in dark clothing. I had a slowness bubble up a the time, and she approached as a blur. I got barely a glance at her before she left, but I think this must be from her.’ She turned the paper toward Wax, showing a simple message. We are watching, Marasi, it read. And we are impressed.”

So, the Set appears to be working for Trell to some degree and here we have a Ghostblood saying that they are impressed with Marasi. To me this could mean two things: 1) The Ghostbloods left the note for the Set to find, which means they are working with the Set. 2) The Ghostbloods left that note for Marasi, knowing that it would get to her somehow. That first one could mean that Kelsier really be living long enough to see himself become a villain.

Now that we're at the final series and with all of Wax chemistry shenanigans, it is making me start to believe that Scadrial is gearing up for the impending cosmere war. Scadrial needs more Mistborn to stand a chance against...well Roshar. And if what Wax did produces Lerasium then that might be the answer. And we know from Alloy of Law that the Set was trying to get women who were descendants of Spook in order to create more allomancers.

Now, this will mean that I will have to give up my Trell is Odium theory, however it is replace with pure smugness that I can feel after being right when I made this post.

Or Trell could just be Kelsier and he's just bullshiting about avatars again.

#brandon sanderson #cosmere #wax and wayne series #mistborn #the lost metal #tlm #lost metal #lm #lost metal spoilers #tlm spoilers

[yukinojou]

The Sandman on Netflix - first impressions

Okay, not so much first impressions as "I mainlined the lot in 26 hours and it only took so long because I was stuck at work for the first 7 watching on my breaks and then had to actually break for sleep". Spoiler-free above the cut, spoilery below it, criticisms at the end.

Caveat: I've been a Sandman fan for 22 years. I first read the books in a big bookshop, doing the surreptitious reading at the bookshelf for two weeks in snatches, because I was in London with very little money and graphic novels were very expensive. It took me five years to buy the lot, and it was only then that I found out how the story ended because I didn't manage to get that far in those two weeks. The Sandman was absolutely foundational for my philosophy, aesthetic, and dear gods Desire was a revelation - "You mean you can be both???" I never liked Preludes & Nocturnes' horror bend, so it's my least-reread volume, but Doll's House is my second favourite after Season of Mists. I've read all the Gaiman-penned addenda and most of the first run of The Dreaming. BIG Sandman fan.

And the show blew me out of the water:

Perfect cast is perfect. I had a lot of reservations because of the announced ones, only Kirby Howell-Baptiste, Mason Alexander Park and Gwendoline Christie immediately seemed right for their parts. But somehow they've dug up Exactly The Right People and let them play it with a richness of nuance that is so rarely allowed in American drama.

The pacing. The show breathes! There are quiet moments, there are very few action sequences, and the big plot moments are people talking. Let the words tell the story, let the actors act, let the scenery breathe and shine.

The filmography is quietly lovely. It starts "typical BBC Period Drama" but veers so soon into the just-off, just-bizarre. All the taxidermy at Fawney Rigg, the richness of every set (messy rooms!), the texture of everything. And even when it's not recreating the panels one by one (which, closest adaptation of a comic I've ever seen), it's shot in such a graphical way, drawing the eyes to the action with the composition, especially in the first episode. Much appreciation for clear vivid lighting in such a dark show too, I didn't have a single moment when I didn't know what was going on. And the colours in the second half are so bright, a very glam lighting that disappears for mists and shadows as the spell breaks.

I saw someone on Tumblr mention this is a bit like Sandman fanfic, that sensibility of fleshing out motivations and behind the scenes actions. And it is, and it works, plus it tightens plotlines in a way that hopefully makes sense to people watching for the first time. Which I'm very much not, as someone who can quote whole pages.

The rewrites are - the first word that comes to mind is Kind. Neil's a more mature writer now, not a shock jock in his twenties, there's no template of gritty 80s comics he has to adhere to in order to get the show to our screens. In the comic, the kindness only really arrived with Death in issue 6. Here, the tweaks let it be present from the beginning. And all the nuance and richness - you can see where he took characters that were flat stereotypes and then jiggled them until layers spread out. More about that below, in the spoilers...

Spoilery plot bits:

I actually love Ethel the most of the changes? She's such a pistol and a conwoman and legend in her own right, using Roderick and probably so many others to learn and forge a life on her own terms. I love the fact she let John use the ruby as a child, that we saw her arrival at Fawney Rigg and all the research she must have done to recognise Alex offhand, and that she showed up the Corinthian in five minutes flat, only letting him get close because she knew that's how she makes people go splat. I already liked her in the book, especially the way she calmly let her co-conspirator go splat there, but letting her shine was very much the right choice. I adore complicated women, and the way her sacrifice was echoed in Unity at the end, though honestly I would have had John grab the amulet from her rather than refuse.

The Corinthian's plotline - more about HIM later because oh my favourite eye munching nightmare was perfect, but that's the fanfic bit. He doesn't exactly change anything in Preludes & Nocturnes, but it makes perfect sense that he'd be doing it, because he's a smart cookie who doesn't want to go home and play nice. And in the Doll's House he actually pulls the plot together a lot. All a logical extrapolation, and building on both his popularity in the Kindly Ones and The Dreaming, and the fact they managed to cast Exactly The Right Guy.

The rewrites in 24/7 - damn, I'm going to have to rewatch this one, aren't I? Ugh. But I've seen Lourdes' character called a tiger woman and she's very much not, she's just trying to forge her happy ending and her equal partner, trying not to poke at the insecurities he has while still supporting him and not diminishing herself. And Bette, so desperate, so fragile there with all the things she won't let herself feel in order to be safe in her small town as a vulnerable single mother, and that's death as a writer, that's why she can't write her book. The scene where she burns her manuscript just made my heart hurt. The whole sequence is so much quieter and less graphic and yet more heartwrenching. You're so ready for Dee to go down with a bang.

(Rosemary! I had an inkling she'd survive when she was Black - because optics of her getting shot in that situation - and when the dog appeared because Neil knows if he killed a dog just after Gregory's sacrifice we'd riot, but oh the layers in the way she did survive, giving up on everything, just pleading for the dog, the way it showed how much a hurt simple kid Dee is too... Rosemary is so much love.)

Doll's House revisions give people more agency, and Gault is adorable as a sort of light mirror of the Corinthian, but I was a little sad about losing Lyta's confinement in the Dreaming, a pregnancy that lasted years. Some of that languidness was there in the series, but the hair brushing and lack of agency in the comics made the explosion of anger after Hector disappeared into a more wrenching shock.

I read about the Cereal Convention years before I attended my first WorldCon, and mwahahaha. Still a loving sendup of literary cons, with their panels and awkwardness and small talk and the flash of recognising a fellow obsessive. Gilbert ducking in and out of panels was brilliant.

Lucifer doing the Oldest Game was absolutely logical (honestly, Choronzon almost besting Dream always felt like a stretch), but oh the ending. As above, Season of Mists is my absolute favourite Sandman volume, and Gwendoline's Lucifer stepping down and shutting out all that racket of demons who dared command them will be the very best. How soon can we have season two?

Casting, broken out separately because the squee is strong:

Tom! Okay, I liked the Sandman Audible thing, and James McAvoy is a favourite actor, but it let me down with the kind of Morpheus voice so much I was resigned to not having the voice-in-my-brain in the series as well. But it is, and it's the grave white-on-black baritone in my dreams. He also acts so subtly with the eyes and makes the best faces, so much I'm willing to forgive the fact he often forgets to close his mouth completely. (He does have lovely lips, doesn't he?) The moments where the stubble comes through were jarring at first, but also very true to the comics. And oh, his 17th century wig was the best, shadows of Michael Wincott in The Crow. Plus the way he shows Morpheus thawing and cogitating desperately each time a woman yells at him (which is roughly twice per episode) is so clear and almost adorable. Oh, the ending is going to hurt so much.

Boyd! I was honestly worried about him because I hadn't seen him in anything before and in his usual offstage look he's - a bit awkward, like completely not what I imagined the Corinthian as, and also not the right voice (again, offstage). But oh, I should have trusted him. Because this is perfect, this is MY Corinthian, the eye-munching gay nightmare I've loved for two decades. True to himself, so much joy of life (ice cream scene!), crafty and in love with adulation, so flawed and bright in ways that completely don't address the serial killer part. I love that even more than Morpheus, he has chemistry with everyone. Like, people see him and want to make out immediately, and you buy it because he's charm on a stick. And he does it all in sunglasses, dammit. And he's so funny! I can't wait until The Kindly Ones, because Boyd and Patton Oswald are going to be a HOOT.

Vivienne! I literally had a phone named Lucien, that's how much I love the character, and she's perfect and open-hearted and frustrated. I really hope they'll bring up her raven past at some point, because that's the core of her devotion and the clear-headed way she sees Morpheus.

Kirby! Oh, she's just THERE, she's Death, that's her and her kindess and cheer and frustration with her boneheaded brother. That bit with her taking off her shoes was just *chef's kiss*. She's there and she's Death and she looks perfect in a 14th century headdress while daring her brother to strike a friendship that'll last centuries.

Come to that, Ferdinand Kingsley was adorable and also very confusing because at some angles he looks very much like my cousin. But his chemistry with Dream was perfect and I can't wait to see him again.

Gwendoline, of course, was dreamy and poisonous and oh, that smile at the very end killed me dead. I didn't know she had so much malice she could drag up to the screen like that, and even that slightly dodgy Rose of Versailles wig couldn't get in the way. Her clothes, on the other hand, mmm.

Mason! I was sold on them as Desire as soon as I looked up them doing Frank'n'Furter and Cabaret MC, but oh, you can see they love Desire the way I do, the way Desire as Dream's sister-brother was a revelation and a breaking of gender chains, and Mason's having so much fun with it. Plus they totally sold me in both sibling scenes, the very tactile and adoring way they were with Despair, the way they kept pushing Dream's buttons to the very end.

(I adore Despair's upgrade to comfy clothes and crocs. Despair's such an everyday thing, so insidious and hiding in plain sight, it fits so well.)

*flails* Everyone else was great too, with honourable mention to Emma Duncan, who gave away so much with her eyes, and Ernest Kingsley (Kai'ckul) who managed to copy Tom's performance to the letter while doing very heavy eye-emoting in just moments.

Criticisms:

I wish Cain and Abel had more time, because I love them. They bring out the Dreaming's creepiness nicely, but it wasn't even mentioned that Secrets are always true and Mysteries are stories. (And yes I mourn Gregory, but it was a well-written sacrifice and Goldie tied the knot nicely.)

I really don't think the budget was as high as rumoured, because the CGI is - sparse? I mean, it's beautiful, but at some points it's C-drama streaming budget, not millions per episode. Really visible outside Hector and Lyta's house, where all people are Very Pastede In, and outside the physical sets like the throne room and the library, the Dreaming suffers from lack of texture at times. The Threshold too, the outside was well done but the inside is just red. I'd love more organic textures there.

Relatedly, the dreams of the house dreamers in Doll's House aren't weird enough, especially when they start to merge by just dropping people into the same meadow. The vortex effect was pretty cool, but before that, no blurring, no overlapping, and the dreams themselves - I loved Zelda breaking Chantal's recurrence, but the dreams weren't different enough. They could have done so much with different lighting, CGI and whatnot, the way they did Dee's attack on the throne room, but I suspect budget was running out and they were relying on the actors to sell it (which they did, but I love that sequence so much in the comic).

And okay, some of my favourite quotes didn't make it in. "Beware the march of ideas!" "I give you a name and the name is lost!" And of course I imagined the summoning incantation differently, more frantic, more building up, but then they surprised themselves that it worked...

And that's everything out of my brain in the first hours. Maybe now I can actually sleep? And someone stop me from writing fanfic with Ethel and the Corinthian because whoa, that chemistry sizzled.

#the sandman #the sandman netflix #the corinthian #sandman #sandman netflix #ethel cripps

[kingstylesdaily]

'The loudest it's ever been': Behind the scenes at Harry Styles' Wembley Stadium shows

by Ben Homewood | musicweek.com

After six thunderous nights, the UK & Ireland leg of Harry Styles’ Love On Tour is over. With Sweden, Norway and Denmark next on the itinerary and the US to follow in August, Styles mania is set to continue and, according to Wembley Stadium’s James Taylor, the UK will be basking in the glow for some time yet.

Styles tweeted that the first of his two London shows was one of his favourites that he and his band have ever done, adding that he felt overwhelmed. Anyone who saw either night at Wembley would attest that most of the crowd felt the same way. Taylor, the venue’s senior commercial director, is still reeling.

“The shows have received unanimous positive feedback, Harry’s fans were probably the noisiest I’ve ever heard in the stadium,” he tells Music Week in the aftermath. “It was a great occasion, a really positive couple of nights. The first of many I would think…”

Indeed, Taylor suggested it won't be long before Styles is back in UK stadiums. But while the dust has settled and the screaming has stopped, the coloured feathers – which were floating in the air and sticking triumphantly to the floor around and inside Wembley last Sunday night – remain.

“I think we’re still cleaning those up,” smiles Taylor. “It's quite difficult, they kept appearing in the bowl ahead of Ed Sheeran’s show. It was a very colourful occasion and Harry has got his own unique style, which is reflected in the way the fans came together.”

Wembley – like Ibrox in Glasgow, the Emirates Old Trafford in Manchester and Dublin’s Aviva Stadium – was simply consumed by Styles and his fans. Having waited longer than they ever anticipated to see him thanks to the pandemic, his supporters conjured bedlam in each venue hours before he walked out on stage. Originally, he was supposed to play the O2 in London, now he has filled Wembley Stadium twice over.

Every last audience member sang every word of each song back at the singer, who pirouetted, jived and shimmied around a rectangular platform that stretched into the standing section. On night one, he wore red spots, on night two, silver, sparklier ones. The singer likes to see into the whites of his fans’ eyes, stopping to read their handmade signs and strike up conversations. On night two at Wembley, he led a chorus of happy birthday to his bass player Elin Sandberg and helped an Italian fan, Mattia, come out. There was also a dedication to dads, including his own, who was in the crowd, for fathers day. In Manchester, he shouted out his first primary school teacher, Mrs Vernon. Then there was the customary encouragement for fans to bestow acts of kindness at each gig.

Such moments illustrate the levels of positivity and love, for that’s what we must call it, that Styles is capable of evoking. At Wembley, as the crowd lost its mind to Bohemian Rhapsody before he came on, you got the impression that the experience of all being in the same place together might have been enough for the audience. When he did emerge, even the slightest brush of a hand or wiggle of a hip sent a shock wave around Wembley’s vast bowl. Even the night air was trembling. The emotion is vivid, palpable, it's hard to think of anyone else who inspires this level of feeling.

Near the front, a fan in a cape fitted out with fairy lights with a wand in each hand caught the eye, casting huge shapes with every flick of the wrist. Scores of people at the back of the standing area twirled each other around, tearing across the floor like every song was the last number at a wedding. During the slow ones, such as Matilda from Harry’s House, they lay on the floor, scrunching up their rain-soaked ponchos, the kind you’d usually see at a theme park.

“I don’t get to do this without you,” Styles said at one point. “It would be me in a room on my own prancing about, a very different vibe. I am yours, thank you.”

And the magic of Harry Styles is that it really felt like he meant it. This stadium show had fireworks (during the set-stealing Sign Of The Times) but it didn’t really need them. The songs, plus their maker’s bond with his fans, provided ample explosion.

To find out what went on over two nights at Wembley and look ahead to Styles’ future playing stadiums, we asked James Taylor to take us behind the scenes…

Firstly, what was your immediate reaction to the two shows? “It was really good, a great occasion. It was a very happy, warm atmosphere with people just sharing their combined love of the artist. They are very passionate, committed fans, very like-minded. He delivered a great show.”

Why do you think Harry Styles inspires such devotion in people?

“Harry’s messaging during the shows is all about loving yourself and I think for young people who struggle with mental health, you can tell that he connects well and gives a really positive message. I think that’s at the heart of the show, his songs are very positive about the self, not just other people. That’s why he connects well with fans, they’ve got a shared belief of how you should live life. It’s very positive and uplifting and people just like that sort of environment.”

What made the show work in a stadium?

“He does a lot of crowd interaction, a bit more than other artists. He chats to his fans and he is known for stopping his shows and talking to them. Bear in mind it’s his first stadium show, so some artists, if it’s your fourth or fifth time, you might need to do something a bit different or it becomes a bit samey. But with his first one, it sold out so quickly that I don’t think he really needed to go too mad on that. People were coming to see him. You might see on his third, fourth or fifth tour, he might start doing [something different], but for now, he’s got a group of fans that just wanted to see him in stadiums for the first time. I don’t think it really needed anything else, I thought his team got it just right.”

Can you tell us about the process of putting the shows together?

“His team were very positive and very happy. I went down after the shows and spoke to the promoter [Live Nation] and everyone in the changing room area was absolutely delighted. Harry had a little afterparty with his team and they were all very happy. I don't think it could have gone any better from his perspective, you can tell it meant a lot. I could hear his party but I didn’t pop in! [Laughs].”

After the postponement and venue upgrades, Love On Tour in the UK has been a very big deal for a number of reasons. What’s it been like to be a part of it?

“It was meant to be at The O2, but demand was so high that it made sense that he went straight into the stadiums. I don’t think it will be his last one, it wouldn't surprise me if he was back in stadiums pretty soon. He’s going to go into that Ed Sheeran and Coldplay level, they’re both due to do their 12th shows this year at Wembley and I can see Harry on his third or fourth tour being up on that level. There’s definitely more to come from him, his show will get better and better. If he’s that good on his first stadium show, you look forward to seeing his second and his third…”

Do you feel you’ve played your part in all the recent success, with Harry’s House and As It Was both topping the charts?

“It feels like he’s on the cusp of something huge, well, he already is [huge]. Obviously he’s had his history with the stadium before and has played with One Direction, but as a solo artist you do feel like this is the start… Ed Sheeran [first played] Wembley in 2015, and you do feel Harry is going to go on and do similar numbers. He’s developed his own brand, his own style, you don’t see a lot of artists manage to do that. A lot of them don’t seem to reach the level of connection with the fans that he has. It’s exciting to see where he’s going to go.”

#kingstylesdaily #harry styles #review: love on tour #music week #june 2022

[10pm-cafe-lattes]

hikaru nara; if it shines

in which the project sekai stars are beginning to make waves- and their fans are letting them know. (VBS and nightcord edition)

alternatively, the fic where i sit VBS and nightcord down and make them look at nice comments about their work.

Vivid BAD SQUAD - ready steady

It starts when Akito gets home from a show. It’s not much, a normal show, but he gets home a little later than usual and catches Ena closing the fridge door.

That is where it starts- Ena looks him up and down, and says, “You did another show, didn’t you? Honestly, you should stream them online or something. Once the show finishes, it’s gone forever.”

She closes the fridge and heads back to her room. Akito considers her suggestion.

Days later, new accounts are created for the band- one on a video platform, and one on a social media site, just for kicks. An and Kohane both on-board with the idea, and Toya going along with it; Kohane smiles and says that she can finally show her parents and her friends their shows, while An grins and cheers about how this will document their rise to stardom. Toya smiles a little, and tells Akito that he thinks it’s a good idea.

Months later, the group of four is gathered in their Sekai, a common occurence. Meiko is brewing coffee and making drinks, Kaito and Luka off somewhere, and Rin, Len and Miku crowding around, listening to them talk about their experiences.

When Kohane mentions that they’ve started uploading their shows, the Virtual Singers gasp, and the Kagamines begin demanding to see them. Toya taps at his phone and relinquishes it to Len, with Rin and Miku pressing in to watch the screen.

“You have a lot of comments,” Miku says, after the video finishes. An blinks at her, tilting her head, “You focus on that?”

“There’s a lot, though!” Rin defends, Len joining in, “Yeah! Have you ever read them?”

“Not really,” Akito says, “We usually just log in, upload, and log out.”

“Read them, then!”

like to claim your 'i was here before VBS became superstars' badge

I've seen them at vivid street before!!! They're even cooler in person

These kids are going to go far.

An looks at Kohane. Akito looks at Toya. None of them are quite sure how to feel, how to react. Because, well… these are actual people, taking the time to leave their thoughts. It’s one thing to turn up at a show and see people grinning, excited, and it’s an entirely different thing to sit in a cafe and see the thoughts and the feelings of strangers who somehow, someway, stumbled upon their music.

To the group of students with a dream that used to feel larger than life, it feels strangely personal. The Virtual Singers have fallen quiet, too- Len squeezes himself in-between Akito and Toya to look back and forth between their phones, Rin ducks under the table and pops up beside Kohane, and Miku pushes her way into the booth next to An.

Anyone else notice how the singer with the twin-tails always does this tiny hop-jump before she leaves the stage?? I think it's precious, she must be protected

the girl with blue hair has such a powerful voice and presence, she brings so much ENERGY to the shows i love it

Can we talk about their style please idk who their stylist is but I would like them to know you're doing great

i could listen to the blue-haired boy's voice for 24 hours and not get bored it's so soothing?? and then you pair it with the other boy's voice and i could listen to them for forever they're so GOOD and it's such a perfect match

OK LIKE I KNOW THIS IS STREET PUNK BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW PRETTY AND MUSICAL IT IS???

how do they dance and sing like that,,,, i would die from exhaustion so quickly,,,,, i'm so impressed,,,

Kohane looks at the comments she sees- ones about how they love Kohane's singing, encourage her to keep going. How she works with An, when they sing together, manage the movement and the music and how every show seems to get even better.

An sees people who don't see her as idiotic, or just a girl chasing her dream. They chatter in excitement, talk about her energy, wonder just how far the band can go together. She sees them supporting her, the power she brings to the stage and to the band, how she and Kohane are perfectly in sync together.

Akito doesn't say anything as he scrolls through the comments and the thoughts, gazing at the people commenting. One or two of his acquaintances from the live house, cheering about how far he's managed to come since he was looking for a partner; complete strangers, who wish him all the best in going even further, compliment his style and his singing, the power and the emotion.

Toya, beside Akito, gazes quietly at what he sees- support, from people they don't know. Compliments about their voices, their teamwork, their energy. Some people he vaguely recognises the names of, from their shows as BAD DOGS and from before he met Akito, cheering them on and supporting them.

There's really not much to say. They all spend some time in silence looking at comments. Some of the more touching ones are screenshotted, saved away on phones; after awhile, the Virtual Singers pipe up- Rin and Len argue over which one of them should be allowed to DJ at the next show to make it even better, Miku and Meiko head back to make everyone drink refills, and Vivid BAD SQUAD exchanges small smiles.

It'll be a long road ahead, they all know it. But they'll be okay- they're not alone, not by a long shot.

Nightcord at 25:00 - composing the future

On some level, Mizuki knows that Nightcord at 25:00 posts their songs online, and obviously that means people will see the songs and react to them. On the other hand, it's not like any of them all care that much about the group's standing and performance, especially after everything with the Sekai, and Yuki, and Miku.

But when they're online early, and have nothing to do... well, what else are they supposed to do, huh? There's still about ten or so minutes until 1 am, and Mizuki has nothing to do (for once), so... they open up one of their videos, and begin scrolling.

Amia's style of editing is so cool... anyone know what program they use?

i love their music so much i hope nightcord knows that

I'm not sure if they'll see this, but if you do, I hope Enanan knows they're my biggest inspiration!

so anyway, in this essay i will explain why yuki is a lyrical genius and i hope they sleep well tonight-

K fanclub rise up where you at

"Oi, Amia, where are you? Even Yuki is here before you!"

Mizuki is dragged back into reality by Ena- and as they grin and tap their keyboard, they know what the day's session will consist of (or at the very least, what twenty or so minutes will).

"Missed me, Enanan?" Mizuki chirps, and they can practically see Ena roll her eyes as Mizuki keeps talking, launching right into it, "So you guys know how we post our videos online, which means people can see."

"Where is this going?" Kanade asks, confused, and Mizuki grins, "Oh, my dear sweet K. You didn't switch off the comments when you posted, so people have been leaving comments. Wanna see some?"

Mizuki's announcement is met with an eerie silence, before Mafuyu, of all people, breaks the quiet with a simple, "Show us."

There's no protest as Mizuki taps away, opening up a screen-share and heading up to the top of the page they were looking at, scrolling down slowly so they can see everything.

nightcord's songs always hit different, if you're seeing this nightcord i hope you know your music has helped me so much

Enanan is my favourite artist. They inspired me to start drawing, too!

i could listen to yuki's voice singing forever like the video if you agree

AMIA EDITING SUPREMACY

To be honest, Mizuki's never really clocked comments about them. They just brush it off and keep going, the things the people they walk past say. This, though, this is different- because these are people who don't know Akiyama Mizuki, they just know Amia. And they like it, the work Mizuki pours their effort into. It's nice to know that, they think. Amia and Mizuki have always been the same person, after all. It's nice to know that Mizuki can be seen.

Kanade has always focused on saving people, with her music. Her father's voice echoes in her head, and she's always worked non-stop on it- first just to save people, in general, and then to save Yuki. She's still working on it, but... maybe it's not hopeless. Not when strangers leave comments, thanking her for her songs and her music. Saying that she's helped them, in some small way. Maybe she will be able to save Yuki, save Mafuyu, after all.

Ena maybe, kind of, wanted to shoot down the idea of looking at the comments. But when Mafuyu, of all people, wanted to look at it... well, Ena would have been mean to shoot it down at that point. She didn't expect to see the support, the encouragement. The people who call her an artistic inspiration. Sometimes, Mizuki has good ideas. Ena can admit that much.

Mafuyu doesn't really know what to think. Why would she? But she doesn't hate this, looking through the comments with the rest of Nightcord- it's interesting to see how other people think. What other people think about the group, and the music, and the lyrics. She can classify this as an emotion, probably- maybe the rest of the group is right. She's not beyond saving, yet.

#yes the title is what you think it is #((your lie in april intensifies)) #ray writes things #project sekai #prsk #vivid bad squad #vbs #nightcord at 25:00 #25 ji nightcord de #niigo #shiraishi an #azusawa kohane #aoyagi toya #aoyagi touya #shinonome akito #yoisaki kanade #shinonome ena #akiyama mizuki #asahina mafuyu #i think that's all the tags. #hm. #hatsune miku

[soleillunne]

congrats on the milestone!!! also i love the idea of the exchange event because i always thought collabs like this are just super cool and cute i love it. already filled out my form HAHA hiraeth + wanderer, you can treat it as a letter from um someone who's just traveling around tevyat and is sending letters to their partner! aaand is implied to have generally poor health condition + be snezhnaya native. anyways you're free to ignore it if you simply don't feel like writing it okay thank you have a good day!!

to my dearest,

i have finally arrived to snezhnaya! and i already bought some stuff! you have no idea how much i missed this place! and i'm super happy to get the opportunity to visit it again… a shame though i didn't get to visit it with you. please, come with me the next time.

i visited some local shops and found so many pretty things i want to show you. i found this really pretty pair of earrings with tiny crystals and dried flowers. we should wear them! i'm really impressed by the art of preserving flowers with cryo. it's cute, isn't it? i also saw some cute folk dresses… um, i may have spent half of my mora on jewelry and clothes alone. and on books.

the moment i found a place to sleep in, i just completely passed out on the bed. traveling is fun but by the archons, it's so tiring! and i hardly had the strenght to get up in the morning too… my handwriting is a little sloppy because i'm still tired but worry not, i'm gonna rest today before going anywhere.

would you like to visit my hometown one day? i mean, it's rather just a small village, but i have so much memories here, and i know so much pretty places, i want to show you them all. maybe we should visit during summer celebrations? i'd make you the prettiest flower crown! anyway, i can feel myself getting sleepy so i'll end this letter here. i hope you're doing well back in sumeru. i'll write you another letter soon!

with love.

hello!! im super excited to see the results of the exchange event haha

Wanderer folds the letter carefully, placing it near his books. He takes out a quill and a paper himself, and starts writing his response.

"My dearest,

Your letter brings both joy and longing to my heart. I can hear the excitement in your voice as you describe your arrival in Snezhnaya already. It warms me to know that you're happy to be back, although I must admit, a pang of regret accompanies the thought that I couldn't be there with you.

Your enthusiasm for the delicate earrings with crystals and dried flowers is cute infectious. I can almost envision you wearing them, their beauty enhanced by your radiant smile. The art of preserving flowers with cryo does sound enchanting, and I'm glad you appreciate such unique craftsmanship. As for the folk dresses, I'm sure they look absolutely charming on you. I can't wait to see you adorned in your new jewelry and clothes.

It's understandable that traveling can be exhausting, but I'm relieved to hear that you're taking some time to rest and rejuvenate. Take all the time you need, my love, and make sure to recharge your spirit before continuing your adventures. Your handwriting may be a little sloppy from weariness, but it only makes me appreciate your efforts to share your experiences with me even more.

I appreciate your invitation to visit your hometown. Although it may be a small village, the memories and the beauty you speak of make it all the more enticing. I would be happy to explore those pretty places with you, especially during the summer celebrations. I can already picture the vivid colors, the fragrant flowers, and the delightful company. Although, I believe the vibrant colors of the flowers would look better on you.

I'm doing well in Sumeru. I’ve been busy doing Lord Kusanali’s biddings, as time seems slower without you by my side, however your letters bring me solace.

Wanderer. "

He folds the paper delicately after adding the final touches, and puts it in an envelope to be sent to you, his heart.

#hiraeth; milestone #RAHHH I HOPE I DID HIM JUSTICE #he may be kinda mean but i genuinely think that if hes dating you he would be so so so kind #esp on paper bc my dude spends hours trying to convey his emotions i jst know it #this looks so ooc but again i think hed be less mean and more whooped for u ^^

[septembersghost]

“When I first read Priscilla Presley’s memoir Elvis and Me, I found it really interesting and was impressed by how personal and revealing it was. I loved how she wrote in a way that was so direct and relatable about going through all the stages that most girls go through into womanhood – but in such a unique and eccentric setting at Graceland, with Elvis Presley.”

“When my cousin’s wife Kate Gersten was telling me about working on a musical of Priscilla’s story, it prompted me to read the book again. I got so into her story and the vivid world, and how wild it must have been to be going to a Catholic girls’ high school in Memphis while living with Elvis at Graceland, struggling to stay awake in class and do her studies after partying all night with Elvis and his friends. And I appreciated the strength she showed in leaving to find her own identity after growing up trying to be his idea of the ideal woman.”

“I worried at first that it might be too similar to Marie Antoinette, but when I spoke to Priscilla I was able to understand more about her perspective and began to see how it could become its own film. It would have its own challenges, such as fitting so much of her life into two hours – and how I would ever find someone to play Elvis. Jacob Elordi did this just how I imagined: in a subtle way, evoking the feeling of him as he was described by Priscilla in his private life. I was so glad to meet Cailee [Spaeny], who Kirsten [Dunst] had just loved working with [on Alex Garland’s forthcoming film Civil War], and it was incredible to see how she could transform from a 15-year-old to a 28-eight-year-old in the same day.”

“On this set, I totally felt in my element, doing what I love. I could see moments that felt like past films, but hopefully that’s now my style and all of my experience went into this one. It was a new kind of pressure to do the story of someone who is alive and I always wanted Priscilla to be happy with it, while including what I responded to in her story. I think it was a complicated relationship and a different time. I hope the audience can feel what it was like for her, and see how we all go through so much to become who we are.”

Thoughts on these new quotes about Priscilla from Sofia Coppola? I know you plan to skip it but it does give me a bit of better hope for the movie.

https://amp.theguardian.com/film/2023/aug/27/sofia-coppola-archive-memoir-memories-book-extract-lost-translation-virgin-suicides

the inner salty girl in me that i try to suppress honestly hopes a bunch of the haters and the "this is the only valid movie about him ever because the estate didn't approve it" people go to see it expecting a flat tale excoriating him and victimizing her, and instead receive a sensitive, thoughtful take on priscillla's life with him and the tempestuousness and sweetness and surreality of that existence at graceland. because they will be outraged and i will smile quietly to myself.

the outer sincere part of me believes, regardless of what transpires with the film's release, sofia really means all of this and was approaching it from a nuanced and compassionate artistic perspective, because everything she's saying in these quotes shares thoughts i've had about it too, and there's value in approaching it with humanity and recognition of differences in era, in the complications of love and youthful dreams and real struggles, in coming into one's own as a person even when that means you have to leave that love and what you knew of your life behind to forge your identity.

#anonymous #letterbox #priscilla 2023

[omegaplus]

# 4,461

August 9, 2018 Mixtape.

A few months ago, I asked to meet up with a goth-girl mutual named Holly, whom I was genuinely interested in, and she agreed. She later revealed that she enjoyed a night out by celebrating her boyfriend’s birthday. She outright lied to me and led me on with a smiling face. I was devastated. The hurt forever changed me, and I was hit with a brand-new era of anxiety, depression, and devaluation. I would never see or feel the same ever again.

I would experience feelings I never had before. Feelings so wild, intense, and vivid that I started seeing the fear and think of things I never thought possible. The ‘June Visions’, I called them. The past strikes and losses of the past unforgivably returned to assure me that I was feeling lesser-than. I’d arrive to work everyday unfocused, lost, worried, and saddened while still trying to justify and convince myself to have her around before the inevitable silence. Time around me moved forward as my mind was at a total standstill, endlessly processing why someone who seemed interested and wanting to meet up would take advantage of me. Plans of having a city contact and new experiences long overdue became null and void. I’d now carry the barbed-wire cross with me everywhere I go, with no volunteers wanting to take it off my back.

I wasn’t told that I’d be trapped, slaughtered, skinned, and hung up to be bled dry. Built up only to collapse. But the show must go on, they tell you. You keep fighting on the front-lines as the empty shells smoke hot and nestle near your heart. You can do the same with your daily deeds while fighting injured until you can’t fight anymore.

I haven’t seen my (Italian) Aunt Laura in ten years. After months of back-and-forth messaging, we both found a day and time to meet up in her neighborhood of Coney Island. I hopped off the ‘D’ line to Surf Avenue and walked through the amusement park and towards the shore. The rides split away from my peripherals as I was in awe of witnessing the infinite waters and flush hazy sunny skies past the thick shoreline in melting temperatures and humidity. It was an experience in the making. I didn’t know it when I was right in the center of it until I was on the outside looking in. The moment burned so bright that the day spent uniting with long-lost family would leave an impression on me.

A doctor’s appointment on a sweltering Thursday made for another day in the city. Since it was an early afternoon visit, I desired to do a photoshoot in Manhattan. I meant to cross off some specific landmarks from the list because something inside me for months was aching to do it. I take my kit and tripod with me for what would be a full day of urgency.

I board the Brentwood train heading west to Penn Station as always, this afternoon under the dull silver skies. I take a seat on the right-hand side of the car moving backwards. There are not many empty seats, so I take my backpack and rest it on my lap. Since I’m headed to Manhattan, I’ll send Holly a text and let her know I’ll be in Manhattan. A roll of chuck-a-luck, but the odds are against me. The sounds in my ear are playing one after another to create the day’s memories as I do my best to distract myself from a newfound pain that persists. My eyes are fixated on the motion blur of the receding buildings, steel structures, streets, shopping centers, trees, and graffiti all over. It wasn’t until the train riding through Woodside that I heard from Holly. “Have fun.” she texted. A passive message of indifference with no emotion or effort. Two words was all it took to show me that she didn’t care.

My arrival in Manhattan started off by arriving at Penn Station in hazy grayscale skies and steady sticky Eighties’ heat. As soon as my check-up was over, I bolted out and took the N/R/W line south to Bryant Park and the American Radiator / Standard Building. I had an interest in seeing the structure ever since Chris Stewart used it for the album cover, and over time became a huge fan. I’d had no idea if the clouds would give way to more clarity, but by the time I stood at the park’s northwestern corner, I’d see them dissipate and stream out to make way for sharper, bluer skies. The park was densely occupied. Foreign families took pictures of their modelesque daughters posing in front of the crowds. The females in indie-rock fashion would sit by themselves under the shade to read their New York Times-recommended bestsellers or the bookshelves lined on the outer edge of the park. I’d take my time, an hour’s worth, to take a multitude of shots facing south at the park’s entrance. I sat down and had a row of saltines stashed in my backpack to satiate my appetite, then called my other Italian aunt Theresa to tell her I was enjoying myself. In reality, I wasn’t.

From there I’d take the 1/2/3 line down to Tribeca and arrive only a few blocks away from the new 1 World Trade Center / Freedom Tower. There was no trace of clouds by then. Just the ever-present blue skies and the shearing sun looking over me. I set up my kit and tripod on the corner of Broadway and Leonard St. facing south and started snapping my ideas away. Natural light, low light, filtered, non-filtered, color mode, telephoto, wide-angle depth. I’d zoom in to the maximum to see the trade center’s metal framing, windows, and antennas in any which way I could, then pull back to capture the vast landscape of Tribeca’s city streets. But it wasn’t enough. I walk a few blocks east over West St. And 9A to the Hudson River, all along Rockefeller Park and Pier 25 to take closer shots of the Freedom Tower. I’m surrounded by strenuous activity all on the mini-golf courses, volleyball courts, children’s playgrounds, and tricks on the skate park. Two hours pass since arriving here, and I sit down to face the water to call my sister to say that I made it safe and sound.

I reversed course on the 1/2/3 line heading up north for my last destination: Times Square. I walk up from the underground stop and I see the multi-million-dollar high-resolution advertisements towering over me. The older digital photos of my visit there in New Year’s Eve 2007 were a factor in me returning. I snap the aesthetics like no tomorrow. My penchant for Helvetica and subway aesthetic were the first targets; synonymous with New York transit shining bright and aesthetically pleasing. The bright dazzling arrays of electronic signs, neons, storefronts, and marquees of all shapes, sizes, colors, and ages. Everything was fair game to me; all while avoiding the infinite stream of passers-by. Me versus mammoth Manhattan’s hustle-and-bustle.

The sun was setting for all of ninety minutes taking photos there, ushering in the day’s conclusion. The mix of Manhattan’s Eighties heat, roasted sulphur and steel had me exhausted, bent, and expired by sundown. I did all what I could’ve done today. I walked back down leaving Times Square carrying the cross to Penn Station and 33rd Street to take the train back home.

Everywhere I went that day, I realize: she’s here. She’s right here - and yet so far away from me.

I enter Penn Station and walk into the station’s department store which was depressing. Old, outdated aesthetics. The shelves were running on empty and I look around for clearance sweets and discounted snacks to tide me over for the hour-long ride. The location was going out of business. No half-off water. It’s Summer. Don’t even dare to be kind or show any mercy for thirst. I roam around in the lobby for an hour before the ticket booths and the large display of destinations and times, waiting to jump on the first indication of what track my train arrives. The Brentwood line finally arrives, and I run with the passengers-slash-school of fish who look to compete for the seat of their choice.

I had a lot of thinking to do; as if I haven’t already in the past two months. I paid a hefty price for pursuing someone, and all I got was collateral damage that will never be fully cleaned up. I tried to negotiate with myself in doing the right thing by hanging in there and still be friends with her, but odds are I’ll never see her. I will continue to place my bets and pay - and pay - and pay - and pay. I’ll pay at a sunken cost to torture myself by foolishly believing that she’ll reach out to me again because who knows what could happen.

And after I step off the train, I’ll be thinking on the drive home. I’ll be thinking what I could’ve had and lost out on. I’ll be thinking what I might have possibly done wrong, what I did or didn’t do, or what I didn’t have enough of for her to do this to me. I’ll be thinking about the wasted time needlessly thrown away. I’ll be thinking about this every night I go to sleep, when I get out of bed, and when I’m at work struggling to balance customers’ childish mentality and entitled attitudes with the whirlwind concoction of loneliness, depression, and every loss coming back; paid in full to haunt me until the day I die.

Those two words would be the very last I’d hear of her.

Viet Cong / Preoccupations “Disarray”

Lower Dens “Ondine”

Black Marble “A Great Design”

Hot Flash Heat Wave “Glo Ride”

Odd Couple “What Kings Do”

Oldbills “Tablecloth”

Holydrug Couple, The “I’ll Only Say This”

Negative Gemini “Bad Baby”

Refreshers “How Bout U?”

Secret Circle “Tube Socks”

Eyedress: "1990" (ft. Pyramid Vritra)

6lack “Prblms”

Oldbills “Salsa Verde”

LaMont Johnson Aces

Uniform & The Body “In My Skin”

Water From Your Eyes “We’re Set Up”

Beat Detectives “Call It What You Want (Segment One)”

End Of A Year / Self Defense Family “Self-Immolation Family”

Ice Age “Under The Sun”

Daughters “Satan In The Wait”

Nothing “Blue Line Baby”

Sean Price “STFU Pt. 2”

Tislatin Onzar 3=2+1

Nothing “Zero Day”

Prison Religion “007”

Big Boss, The motion picture soundtrack “The Killing Fight”

Oldbills “Black Ice”

Eyedress “High Street Drive”

Tanya Tagaq f. Shad “Centre”

Ta-Ra “L’il Bit”

Sweet Valley “Sentimental Trash”

Wati Heru X Kashaka “BKWYA”

All These Fingers “Puerta Vallarta”

Body Without Organs “Osiris Rises”

Underworld & Iggy Pop “Bells And Circles”

Alt-J “Story 4 Sleeplessly Embracing” (clipping. RMX)

Moor Mother “Washington Park”

Erick Arc Elliott “Breaking”

Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever “An Air Conditioned Man”

Cansei De Ser Sexy “Girlfriend”

Flastbush Zombies “The Results Are In”

Miss Red “Come Again”

Prison Religion “Glass”

Happy Meals / Free Love “Pushing Too Hard”

Erick Arc Elliott “Fifteen Minutes”

Palm “Dog Milk”

Oldbills “Weekendluv”

Cellars “Real Good Day”

Addison Groove “Footcrab” (DJ Rashad & DJ Spinn RMX)

Charles Manson Lie

Water From Your Eyes “That’s The Girl”

Miss Red “Dagga”

Chvrches “Never Say Die”

Nine Inch Nails “The Background World”

Oh No “Banger”

Curren$y f. The Game & Prodigy “The Type”

CASisDEAD “Leon Best”

Diseno Corbusier “Meta Metalic”

Beat Detectives“ (Undiscernable) Repetition Heavy Traffic: New NYC Vibe 2”

#omega #music #mixtapes #reviews #playlists #hip-hop #rap #industrial #dancehall #synthpop #cloudrap #techno #electronic #shoegaze #indie #beats #jungle #drum-and-bass

[faveficarchive]

ILLUMINATIONS OF THE SOUL

by Cousin Liz

1997 Jul 30Disclaimers: The characters of Xena: Warrior Princess are owned by MCA Pictures and used here without permission. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this story.

This story shows the loving relationship between two women. You may even consider it explicit at times. If this type of story offends you, or you are not old enough to read it, please stop reading now.

I hope you all enjoy.

FAN FICTION COVER:

The graphic below is a fan fiction cover that I created for this story. To view a larger version of the cover, please click on the graphic.

Chapter 01

The well traveled road wound its way through the countryside. The trees on both sides had begun to change color and the crunch of dried leaves under foot was something that Gabrielle always loved to hear. She appreciated the cooler days for traveling, except for the price paid at night. 'Soon it will be getting downright cold,' she speculated to herself. They were nearing a town and Xena intended to stay only long enough to buy supplies and get a worn buckle on Argo's saddle replaced.

Gabrielle, who had been discussing the recent exploits of their last adventure, fell silent. She could sense the change in Xena. Back ramrod straight; she sat tall in the saddle. Chin up, shoulders squared and her normally blue eyes now icy gray slits. 'And that look.' It still sent shivers down Gabrielle's spine every time she witnessed the transformation. 'This must have been what greeted the unfortunate people of the villages and towns that Xena and her army raided. The Warrior Princess.' Gabrielle closed her eyes, trying to picture the scene.

First impressions meant everything and Xena had this down to a science. She wanted no trouble from anyone in town. Although her warlord days were past her, the look still served it's purpose. "Gabrielle," Xena said suddenly, thrusting a protective arm in front of her friend who had been walking along side Argo. With her other arm, she pulled Argo to an abrupt stop. Xena sat there motionless, listening.

"What is it?" Gabrielle asked in a hushed tone. "Highway robbers? A deadly animal? A hungry cyclops? Joxer?"

"No, no, no and NO," Xena chided her friend for her vivid imagination. Even though the town was not yet in sight, she could just make out the sounds of people. Many people. "Something is going on in the town up ahead. I hear the sounds of too many people to be coming from a place of that size. Keep alert," Xena warned. "There could be trouble." They continued on.

Gabrielle gripped her staff tighter and gave a few warm-up swings, loosening her muscles. A small smile worked its way across her face. 'Yes! She didn't even try to make me stay behind this time while she went on ahead. Nor did she make me climb onto that beast of a war horse of hers, and hide behind her.' It had taken nearly two years, but Gabrielle felt that Xena was finally trusting her to hold her own in a battle.

They rounded a bend in the road and the countryside opened up onto recently harvested fields. In the distance stood the town. "Wow. It looks like the entire population of the town is out. Xena, they're having some kind of a celebration!" The young woman's eyes danced with excitement.

"From the size of the crowd, I'd say the people from the surrounding villages are there also. Must be their harvest festival." Xena caught the look in her young friend's eyes. "Maybe we could have a look around... if you'd like?"

"Oh Xena, could we?"

"Sure, Gabrielle. C'mon." Xena reverted back to her warrior princess persona.

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Even with all of the distractions the festival had to offer, Xena and Gabrielle's entrance into the town did not go unnoticed. It never did. Xena was not one to blend in easily. Clad in black leather and armor, with a flowing mane of long black hair, the six-foot frame atop the behemoth golden mare stood in stark contrast to the smaller green-eyed strawberry blonde walking along side.

They continued through the village, heading for the inn. "I'm going to stable Argo and give her a good brush down. Why don't you see about getting us a room for the night," Xena said as she dismounted her horse.

"I thought you wanted to pick up supplies and be on your way?"

"I know that's what I said, but I think a short rest will do us all a world of good. Even Argo." At the mention of her name, Argo turned her head and let out an appreciable snort.

"OK, OK," Gabrielle laughed as she stroked the flank of the mare. "I'll see to the room. Then I think I'll check out the marketplace."

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With a room for the night rented, Gabrielle enveloped herself in the crowd. She really enjoyed the hustle and bustle of the marketplace. She had just spent the last five days traveling the road, with Xena and Argo as her only source of companionship. Mind you, she wasn't complaining, but sometimes Argo was a better conversationalist than Xena. Everywhere she looked, children were laughing and running, many with brightly colored painted faces.

Husbands and wives strolled hand in hand, while young couples were seen in the embrace of each other. The merchants hawked their wares, while jugglers walked the street, tossing brightly colored balls in the air, sometimes between themselves. Off to the left, Gabrielle saw a crowd gathering around a small, raised platform where a man was swallowing swords. Minstrels roamed the street, their lively music sometimes cutting through the din of the festival crowd.

Gabrielle was excited at the prospect of doing a little shopping. 'Nothing like a little bartering to get the blood flowing,' she thought to herself. There was everything imaginable for sale here. Food stalls abounded. From the necessities of meat, cheese and breads, to sweets and pastries. 'I'm definitely going to have to check that stall out later,' she reminded herself.

Bolts of fancy woven cloth decorated a stall, while further on, an old white-haired man displayed fine leather work. Gabrielle stopped to delicately finger a beautiful hair barrette. Intricately woven, threads of white and silver silk were braided around individual strips of leather, forming a beautiful white flower which glistened in the sunlight. Gabrielle knew not to even bother to ask the price. 'No amount of bartering will ever get that piece to an affordable price.' It wasn't that they were hurting for money. It was just that the cost of living on the road could sometimes be unpredictable. 'And even with all of my best bartering skills, the price of that barrette would still be equivalent to the cost of a week's worth of supplies, including Argo's.' She moved on before the merchant had a chance to strike up a conversation.

Gabrielle headed off to buy the supplies they needed and find the dessert stall she spied earlier. She would pick up a few treats to surprise Xena. She knew that as much as Xena hated to admit it, she had a sweet tooth almost as big as her young friend's. With her shopping done and the treats tucked safely away in the bottom of her satchel, Gabrielle headed to where she would most likely find Xena.

Xena was just leaving the Blacksmith's; Argo's saddle resting comfortably on her left shoulder. "So?" inquired Gabrielle, as she approached.

"The buckle's been replaced. Good as new. How'd your shopping go?"

"Great! I got everything we need and I had a wonderful time looking around."

"Good. Let's get this stuff put away." Knowing how her young friend thrived on crowds, Xena continued, "there's still some time until dinner. Maybe we can have a look around."

Gabrielle's eyes lit up at the prospect. She knew how much Xena disliked crowds. "Really? If you'd like... I saw this guy swallowing swords earlier. Over there." She pointed in the general direction of the platform.

"Swallowing swords, heh? We'll have to check into that. Never know when it might come in handy," Xena replied in her best serious voice. She turned and started to head to the stables with Argo's saddle before Gabrielle could see the grin working its way onto her face.

Gabrielle stood there looking after her friend incredulously. 'Never know when it might come in handy?' she repeated to herself. 'Heh. I sure hope she's joking. Then again... Xena rarely jokes about anything.' Gabrielle shook her head trying to disengage the image that was forming of Xena and her sword, and took off after her.

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Chapter 02

The sun had begun to set by the time Xena and Gabrielle returned to the inn. They had spent a rather uneventful afternoon taking in the sights, although sometimes Gabrielle felt like they were one of the attractions. 'I guess we do make for a rather odd couple,' she mused. She didn't even want to begin to guess what people thought she was doing traveling with the likes of the warrior princess. 'Best to not even go there,' she reminded herself. Nobody ever came right out and said anything, but she could feel herself being watched. She knew Xena could feel it too, but she never let on. 'I guess she's used to it,' but for Gabrielle, it still made her feel a little queasy whenever it happened.

They sat in their usual spot at the back of the tavern. Xena leaned against the back wall, surveying the room before her. Her friend sat across from her.

Gabrielle enthusiastically sliced another large chunk of meat from the steak before her. Her eyes sparkled with glee as she held it up for a moment's examination before devouring it. She was in the Elyssian Fields and loving every minute of it.

"I guess you're going to want me to add cow to my list of dinner quarries now," Xena said with a bemused smile on her face.

"Oh Xena -" Gabrielle almost choked as she attempted to swallow her latest mouthful. "You know I love what you catch for our dinner. I can just picture the warrior princess stealthily tracking some poor farmer's milk cow out in his pasture. And what would you tell him Xena? 'Well, you see... my friend was just hankering for a big juicy steak.' I don't think he'd go for that."

"Well, I'm glad you're enjoying yourself. It's not often we get to eat this well." It didn't happen often, but there were days when try as she might, no animal would snare itself in one of the traps she had set. And there wasn't always a river nearby with a ready source of fish. Meals those nights consisted of bread and what little dried fruits, smoked meat or cheese they had left from their last stop at a village. Gabrielle never complained, although her stomach usually gave her away. Xena's face clouded over at these thoughts.

Gabrielle had been busily slicing off another large chunk from her steak when she glanced up and noticed that Xena had gone away. "Xena," she called softly. Xena was staring down at her plate of food, her arms resting on either side of her plate. She looked up. Gabrielle's heart sank as she looked into her eyes. 'What could she have been thinking about to cause such sadness to mar the beauty of those blue eyes?' Gabrielle thought. She instinctively began to reach across the table to cover Xena's hand with hers, but pulled up short at the last moment and wrapped her fingers around her mug instead. They were in public, she reminded herself. She just had a hard time restraining herself sometimes. She always tended to talk with her hands. They seemed to have a life of their own, and went where they wanted.

"Hmm," Xena said as she came back to the present.

"What were you thinking about?" Gabrielle tried to ask nonchalantly.

"Oh, nothing in particular. Just trying to give my stomach a chance to catch up," Xena replied as she went back to her meal.

Gabrielle knew it was pointless to try to gain access to the warrior's thoughts. If they had been alone, she would not have let the subject drop so easily. She would have prodded Xena a little and maybe gotten somewhere. However, in public, Xena wore her warrior princess armor inside and out. Gabrielle understood, though. It had kept them from being bothered or harassed on more than one occasion.

As they continued their meal, Gabrielle tried to fill the air with light talk, attempting and finally succeeding in bringing Xena out of her funk. "Wow! I don't think I could eat another bite," the bard exclaimed as she pushed her empty plate away and leaned back on her chair, patting her bare midriff.

Xena rolled her eyes. "Considering you polished off everything on your plate and then went back for seconds..." A smile formed on Xena's face. "I guess that means you don't have room for dessert?" she asked, first smelling and then seeing the trays of nutbread that were being brought out of the kitchen and placed on the bar.

Gabrielle turned and followed Xena's eyes as she focused on the dessert. "Nutbread! Well... I guess I *could* find room for a small piece." Gabrielle's eyes danced at the prospect. She watched as the innkeeper began to slice the loaves.

"I'll go and make sure she cuts you a generous piece," Xena said as she rose and made her way to the bar. Gabrielle watched her go. She noticed that as Xena passed people at other tables, they almost recoiled from her, fearful of her touch. Gabrielle knew Xena could feel this -- this cold vacuum effect that hung in the air around her. To be around so many people and still be alone. Gabrielle wondered how Xena could live with it.

The warrior arrived a few minutes later balancing two plates of nutbread and a large port for herself and a cider for Gabrielle. "Here you go," she said, as she sat back down and sipped her drink. She watched as Gabrielle descended on her dessert. 'Where does she put it?' she contemplated.

Gabrielle was soon licking her fingers and pinching up the last of the crumbs from her plate. "Oh Xena, that was the best nutbread I ever had." Looking down a little embarrassed she continued, "I even think it was better than my mother's." Xena silently pushed her untouched dessert over to Gabrielle. "No Xena, No! I won't. I know you like nutbread too." Gabrielle pushed the plate back to her friend.

"Gabrielle, I got it for you." Xena began to push the plate back across the table. Gabrielle put her hand out and stopped it midway. Both women continued to stubbornly push the plate in opposite directions. "This is getting us nowhere."

"Truce," Gabrielle said softly, not wanting anybody seated at the table next to them to overhear the warrior princess losing a battle. "We'll share." Both women slowly released their grip on the plate, but kept their arms extended in case the other changed their mind.

Gabrielle broke off a piece and held it out for Xena. She knew it was the only way she would get her to eat any. Reluctantly Xena accepted it and sat back. "Hmm... This really is good." She looked up to see Gabrielle watching her.

"I told you so."

"That's why I wanted you to have it."

"Xena." Gabrielle said with slight exasperated. "You have got to learn to indulge yourself. You're always doing good things for other people. You've got to stop and do them for yourself once in a while." She broke off a small piece of nutbread and popped it into her mouth. "See, it's not that hard." Gabrielle broke off a larger piece and handed it to her friend. She continued in this manner until she had successfully fed the rest of it to Xena.

Xena quietly resigned herself to the force feeding. She knew when it was useless to argue with her bard. 'And maybe she's right. When was the last time I did something for no other reason than to please myself?'

"Xena? Do you hear that?" Gabrielle asked as she turned to look for the source.

"Uh huh," Xena murmured. She was leaning back against the wall, eyes closed, arms crossed, her legs stretched out and extended under Gabrielle's chair. The soft strains of instruments being tuned floated in on the night air. Many of the couples who had finished eating were already starting to disappear outside.

Gabrielle got up and approached the innkeeper. "Excuse me, Androniki. I was wondering. What's going on outside?"

"The town is holding an evening dance," she replied. "There's no building large enough to have it in, so we simply have it outside, under the stars. It's a bit brisk tonight, but everybody will warm up fast enough when the dancing starts." She motioned Gabrielle towards the window. Gone were the stalls the merchants used earlier, and lanterns had been hung throughout the center of town. A small group of people could be seen in front of the Blacksmith's shop, readying their instruments. Families and couples were beginning to gather, coming from all directions. "You should come join us. The dance is always quite fun."

"Thank you," Gabrielle replied. She turned to look at Xena, who hadn't moved from her spot. This was not an easy task that lay ahead of her. Gabrielle knew Xena was not the least bit interested in some silly dance. Come to think of it, in the last two years they had been together, she had never seen Xena dance. 'Well, there was that time when she went undercover at the Miss Known World Pageant, but that doesn't count. That was business.' They did attend the reception held in their honor by King Gregor and Pandora, after Xena successfully rescued the baby. And there was dancing after the dinner. Xena simply sat there wearing her patented look-at- me-the-wrong-way-and-die warrior princess look. No man dared get close enough to ask her to dance. She stayed for a little while, before disappearing with her excuse of needing to check up on Argo. The bard wondered what Xena would ever do if she didn't have that horse to fall back on as an excuse.

Gabrielle walked back over to their table. By now the place was practically empty. "Xena. Xena?" At first, Gabrielle thought that Xena had nodded off, then thought better. 'Xena never nods off.' Xena's eyes opened and met the bard's. "I was wondering... that maybe... that is if you're not too tired..."

"Sure."

"... we could go outside and watch the dancing... for a little while that is..." Gabrielle blinked and gave her head a small jerk and shake as she realized that Xena had spoken.

Xena stretched the muscles in her arms as she held them out straight and stood with a fluid grace to her full six feet. She motioned to the speechless bard to proceed with her to the door. 'Gabrielle seldom asks for anything, and damn if I'm going to deny her some simple pleasures in her life. And the look on her face when it dawned on her that her request had been answered was priceless,' Xena chuckled to herself. 'Worth the last dinar I have to see that.'

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Chapter 03

The grounds outside were now teeming with life. The music had begun, and couples were whirling to a lively tune. Even the young children were off to the side attempting to mimic their elders. Most of the oldest folk were seated on benches and chairs that were drug from neighboring stores and homes.

Xena stood on the porch at the corner of the inn. She had found a patch of shadow that the nearest lantern could not breech. She leaned against the building sipping the port she brought outside, her left foot resting comfortably on the lower railing at the side of the porch.

Gabrielle leaned over the front railing, craning her neck to the left and then to the right. "Xena. It looks like the whole town has showed up tonight! I'll bet not a single person is left at home. Everybody is having such a good time. It's nice to be in a town where everyone is not in fear of an advancing warlord. We've seen plenty of that already."

Xena wondered how many town's festivities had been ruined by her and her army during her warlord years. She downed the rest of her port, struggling to push those memories back from where they had escaped. Gabrielle walked over and stood next to her, trying to steal some of her body heat. She rested her head on the warrior's shoulder, wistfully watching the couples, now dancing in each other's arms to a slow song. Xena watched Gabrielle out of the corner of her eye. There was such depth of emotion to her young eyes, but Xena could not be sure what Gabrielle was thinking. She just wished that Gabrielle could have her heart's desire, and Xena would do anything to make her young friend happy. 'She must see herself in the arms of a charming young man, being held and loved as they move with the music.' The mental image of this shook Xena back to the present. 'And this will never happen -- not with me hovering over her. No man will dare get close enough to even speak with her.' "Gabrielle, I need to go check on Argo."

Gabrielle knew what this line really meant. Xena was tiring of the dance and wanted an excuse to disappear for the rest of the night. "Xeeena." Gabrielle drawled, letting her friend know that she knew what she was up to.

"No Gab. I promise. I'll be back in a little while."

"You promise?"

"Yes, I promise." With that, Xena left.

Now Gabrielle was perplexed. She was sure Xena was looking to get away for the rest of the evening. 'But if Xena makes a promise, she keeps it. I wonder if this time she really simply wanted to check on Argo? I guess I'll never figure her out.' Gabrielle moved back over to the center of the porch. The lantern on a nearby post lit up her red-blonde hair, and the dance of the flame sent fiery streaks pulsating down the strands of her hair.

Xena stood off in the shadows of a nearby building, keeping an eye on her friend. 'Just in case anybody tries to do her harm,' she told herself. After only a couple of minutes, Xena got her wish. A handsome young man approached Gabrielle. Xena suppressed her desire to wrest the young man's gaze from her friend and send him packing. 'Get a grip on yourself, Xena. This is obviously what Gabrielle wants and needs.'

"Hi, my name is Andreas," the young man said, looking up at Gabrielle.

"Uh... hi," Gabrielle replied, looking down at her hands. She knew this would happen as soon as Xena left her alone. 'Now where is that warrior princess when I need her.'

"I was wondering if you'd join me for the next dance?" The young man asked, gesturing toward the couples.

"Oh uh -- heh... I'd really love to you know, but... ah... you see... just the other day I took a tumble off a horse and my leg is still giving me some problems." She began to massage her upper right thigh for effect. "Otherwise, I would have loved to dance the next dance with you." Gabrielle tried to let him down as nicely as possible. He bowed, turned and left. 'Quick thinking, girl. He almost had you.'

Xena watched the entire too brief exchange. She was too far away and there was too much noise to pick up any of the conversation, but she was sure that he had asked Gabrielle to dance. 'The young man seemed pleasant enough,' she pondered. 'I wonder what he said to make Gabrielle decline? If he said anything to upset her, I'll... I'll...' Xena did her best to get back under control as she returned to the porch.

"I'm back, just like I promised." She wanted to ask Gabrielle what happened with the young man, but knew her friend would get upset if she found out Xena was spying on her.

"Oh... hi Xena," Gabrielle said, suppressing a yawn that was a little too over theatrical. "You know, I'm really getting tired. I think I'll turn in now," she said sleepily, absentmindedly massaging her upper right thigh.

Xena didn't believe Gabrielle was tired for a minute. She looked the bard over carefully, trying to see if she could ascertain her true motivation. Concerned, Xena asked, "What's wrong with your leg?"

"Oh this... nothing. Old war wound."

"If it's bothering you, let me take a look at it," Xena said, concern for her friend growing.

"No, no, that's alright. Heh -- I was just kidding!"

"Ga-bri-elle."

"Really Xena, it's nothing."

"O.K. If you insist. I'm a bit tired too," she said, trying to change the subject. "I think I'll turn in also." Xena was still concerned as she noticed Gabrielle favoring her one leg over the other as they entered the inn. She first noticed Gabrielle rubbing her leg as she talked to the young man. 'It has something to do with him. I'll get to the bottom of this...'

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Chapter 04

The music from out front wafted up to the room, entering through their window at the back of the inn. Gabrielle stood at the open window, gazing out upon the night sky. Xena busied herself, getting a fire going in the large fireplace, which took up most of the wall to the left. For such a small town, the inn provided spacious and clean rooms. To the right of the window stood a large bed in the corner. To the right of the door was a chest with wash basin on top. Another chest stood just to the left of the door. When Xena had a warming blaze lit, she walked over to the near chest and began to methodically remove her weapons and armor. She knew she hadn't really needed them on earlier; it was just that she felt almost naked in public without them. 'And one should always be prepared,' she reminded herself.

"A dinar for your thoughts," Xena said, as she turned to find Gabrielle still staring out the window.

"Oh, nothing. I was just listening to the music," Gabrielle said softly, as she turned to face Xena.

"Why didn't you take that young man up on his offer for a dance earlier?" Xena blurted.

"Xena! You were watching!?!"

"I was just rounding the corner when I saw him turn and walk away. I didn't think he was there to ask you the time of day!"

"Oh."

Xena felt guilty for the deception, but continued her gentle prodding. "You seemed so happy at the dance. I thought you would've wanted to participate."

"Well, yeah. It's just that... well... " Gabrielle looked down, fidgeting with the top of her skirt. She would not finish.

Xena covered the distance between them in a few long strides. She took Gabrielle's chin in her hand and coaxed her to meet her eyes. "What's wrong," Xena demanded. "Did he say something to upset you. I'll find him and teach him how to treat a young lady." Xena hissed the last part out through clenched teeth.

"NO, NO Xena!" Gabrielle suddenly became very scared for the poor man's life. She knew what Xena was capable of doing. "He was a perfect gentleman."

"Then why didn't you accept his offer?" she asked, becoming even more confused by this new fact.

"I... can't dance." Gabrielle said it so softly, that Xena almost didn't hear her.

"Is that all?" Xena mused. "I was ready to go and take his head off."

"Is that all? Is that all!" Gabrielle was becoming indignant. "I've tried and tried. I just get so confused with my feet that I end up making a fool of myself. At the barn dances we had back home in Poteidaia, my family practically disowned me, my dancing was so bad. Poor Lila tried to teach me, but eventually gave up. It was useless."

Xena could see the look of utter futility in her eyes. "Ga-bri-elle." She reached down and softly clasped one of her friend's hands. Xena rested her other hand on Gabrielle's waist, and took a step back so she was at arms length from her.

Xena told herself that what she was about to do was strictly for Gabrielle's benefit, and that it had nothing to do with the fact that it would be a perfect excuse to touch her young friend. And she seemed to be finding excuses more and more often to do just that.

A friendly pat on the back, or a touch of her forearm. The times she cherished the most were at night. Xena wasn't sure exactly when it started, but some time ago, by some mutually unspoken consent, their bedrolls began to be laid out next to each other. Everything stayed strictly platonic, but sometimes Gabrielle had a tendency to end up with some part of her body draped over the warrior. And Xena never complained. She simply lay there motionless, reveling in the warm touch of the bard and wishing it would never end.

Gabrielle froze in her place, uncertain what Xena's next move would be. She trusted her friend with her life, although more times than she cared to admit. Xena locked eyes with Gabrielle and simply said, "Let me show you how." She lifted the small hand clasped in hers and held it out to the side. "Just listen to the music and follow my lead," Xena said, a smile spreading across her face.

"XENA!" exclaimed Gabrielle, as she quickly began to try to keep pace with her new dance partner. A smile reached Gabrielle's face, quickly replaced with a look of grim determination as she concentrated on watching Xena's feet, trying to mimic her steps while not smashing one of the warrior's toes. It was useless. After only a few moments, Gabrielle became so worried that she did just that. "Oh Xena, I'm so sorry," she exclaimed, pulling to a stop. A tear began to roll down her cheek.

"Gabrielle, I'm fine." Xena tried to console her best friend, while wiping away the tear. "Look. I've still got my boots on. I go into battle wearing these. I didn't feel a thing. Honest."

"It's hopeless, Xena. I told you I couldn't dance."

"Gabrielle, we've only just started. You're good with your staff, very coordinated. And you pick up the different moves I teach you quickly and efficiently. What was one of the first things I taught you when facing an opponent in battle?"

Gabrielle thought for a moment and replied, "Look 'em in the eyes. Always maintain eye contact. You can tell what your opponent's next move will be from their eyes." Dawn broke over Gabrielle's face as she realized what she was saying. "That's just -"

"- like dancing," Xena finished the sentence. She held her young friend's chin in her hand and locked eyes with the most beautiful hazel green she had ever seen. Without taking her eyes from the bard's gaze, Xena released her chin and lightly trailed her hand down Gabrielle's arm, once again finding and clasping her small hand. She placed her other hand back on Gabrielle's waist and began to move with the music.

Gabrielle felt captured by the powerful blue pools of Xena's eyes. She couldn't break contact if she tried. They moved about the room, keeping up with the moderately paced song that was playing outside. A smile formed on Xena's lips, and Gabrielle infectiously caught it from her. As far as Gabrielle was concerned, she no longer had feet. She felt as if she was gliding over the floor, following those blue eyes wherever they lead. As the song came to the end, Xena spun Gabrielle out and then back towards her, catching her in her powerful hands before she had a chance to make contact.

"XENA! I did it! I really did it! I danced!!" She caught Xena off guard as she threw her arms around her waist and gave her friend a big hug, burying her face in Xena's chest. The bard was in shock. She didn't believe she had just danced -- and with Xena! She tried hard to burn into her memory what it felt like to be swept around the room by the woman of her dreams, certain she would never get another chance to feel this close to her.

Xena froze. She was not sure what to do. When she heard Gabrielle start to softly cry, she wrapped her arms around the young woman, wondering what was wrong. They stayed like that for a long minute. When Xena felt her friend's tears had stopped, she gently peeled her away from her chest and looked down at her.

"Oh Xena, I'm sorry." Gabrielle saw where her tears had left the front of Xena wet. She absentmindedly began to wipe them away with her hand, oblivious to the effect it had on the warrior.

"Gabrielle, it's fine. Never mind," Xena got out, as she took the young woman's hand from her chest. She tilted the bard's head upwards and wiped the few remaining tears from her face. "What's the matter?"

"I'm just so happy. I... I know it sounds silly, but I was always so ashamed and embarrassed that I couldn't dance. People would make fun of me when I tried, so I stopped trying. I just can't believe how easy it is. How easy *you* made it. Thank you."

Xena couldn't help herself. A wry smile caught the corner of her mouth as she stated, "I have many skills." They both broke out in a fit of laughter.

A lively piece had just begun, and Gabrielle was surprised when once again she was swept off her feet as Xena's eyes carried her aloft. They continued in much that same fashion for the next dozen songs. At one point, Xena showed Gabrielle the steps to a traditional Greek folk dance that was being played, and was delighted to find that Gabrielle picked it up as easily as she had any staff maneuver.

"Oh Xena, I don't know when I last had so much fun," Gabrielle exclaimed as the song came to an end. The last two songs had been particularly fast-paced, and Gabrielle was pleasantly exhausted. As no song immediately began, she figured that either the musicians were also in need of a break, or were done for the night.

Xena could see a slight flush on Gabrielle's face, and wondered if there was one on hers too. "I'm glad you're enjoying yourself. I just wish you'd told me sooner that you couldn't dance. I would have been able to show you in time for the dance. Then you wouldn't have had to turn that young man away."

"True. Um... Xena? If we had stayed, would you have asked me to dance?" Gabrielle looked into Xena's eyes and saw the pain of her soul.

Xena, surprised by her directness, took a couple of steps back and sat on the edge of the bed. She knew Gabrielle deserved an honest answer, but didn't want to hurt her feelings. Gabrielle walked over and quietly sat next to her, allowing her friend time to gather her thoughts. "No," Xena said softly. "Not that I wouldn't have wanted to, but..."

"Yeah, I can just see it now. Parents grabbing their children and running for the hills. Wouldn't want their little ones exposed to two people dancing, now would we?" Gabrielle said sarcastically, the firelight catching a single tear as it ran down her face. "Xena, why are people so cruel?"

"I don't know Gab, I just don't know."

The strains of a slow, melodious tune broke the silence. Xena stood, bowed deeply and offered her hand to Gabrielle. "Would you honor me with this next dance?" Gabrielle beamed as she accepted. Just before they began the bard's body betrayed her. Before she realized what she was doing she had closed the arms length distance Xena had maintained throughout the evening. She rested the side of her head against the warrior's chest and waited.

Xena's first impulse was to run. Yet every fiber of her being wanted this. Needed this contact. She just wasn't sure if Gabrielle knew what she was getting herself into. Slowly, hesitantly, she allowed her arm to wrap around her friend's back. She rested her cheek on Gabrielle's head and they danced. The bard no longer maintained eye contact, but felt confident she could follow the beat of Xena's heart. For Xena, the contact was magnetic. So conscious was she of the bard's body pressed up against hers, that Xena was sure she would falter and crush one of Gabrielle's feet. She pushed everything but the music from her thoughts, and they danced as one in the warm glow of the fireplace.

'There is no place on this earth I'd rather be right now,' thought Gabrielle, as she buried the side of her face deeper into her friend's chest. She had known for some time that her feelings for Xena had changed; grown. And she suspected Xena might have been feeling the same way towards her. Now she thought she had her answer. The wall Xena erected to keep the outside world from knowing her true feelings was useless at such close proximity. 'Ah Xena,' Gabrielle thought, as a small smile played on her lips. She could feel the warrior's heart flutter and quicken as she held her close.

The song came to an end and the people outside clapped and voiced their praises to the musicians for a wonderful evening of music. Xena and Gabrielle continued to stand in each other's arms, neither one wanting to break contact. Gabrielle knew she had to proceed slowly. Xena could be a bit skittish at times. She had felt her freeze and almost bolt just before, but she also knew that Xena would not make the next move. It was up to her. Gabrielle raised her head and brushed her lips against Xena's. She quickly returned to those lips for another small kiss before returning to the comfort of her friend's chest, hugging her tight. After a moment, she released her and stood back, giving her friend the space she knew she required.

Xena just stood there, the tingling sensation of Gabrielle's lips still pulsing on hers. "Gabrielle?" The bard could hear all of Xena's questions and fears in that one word. In response, she ran her finger slowly down the warrior's arm, feeling muscles jump and twitch under her touch. "Are you sure you're not just reacting to the music, to the dancing?"

Gabrielle brought her eyes up to meet Xena's. She had never felt such intensity for another person, not even Perdicus. "I'm not sure," she honestly admitted. "But I know how I feel about you, how I've felt for some time now."

Xena held her emotions in check as her mind raced over this new bit of information. 'Can this actually be happening? Could she be feeling the same way I do? Does she even know that two women can-- What if this is just some form of hero worship... I couldn't...' "Gabrielle." Xena took the young woman's hands in hers and gave them a squeeze. "It's late. I think it would be best if we tried to get some sleep." Smiling, she bent down and gave the bard a soft kiss on the cheek.

Gabrielle took a tentative step forward, stopping only inches from making contact with Xena. She could feel the electricity in the air surrounding them. She saw the love Xena had for her for the first time, and suddenly realized that she had seen this look numerous times before, always when the warrior thought she wasn't looking. A quick glance down from her horse, a lingering gaze across the campfire, in the first few seconds when Xena finally woke her in the morning. She had just never allowed herself to hope that what she saw was love. Now, she had no doubt.

She carefully placed the palm of her right hand on Xena's stomach and felt the warrior instantly tense. Looking up into her eyes she saw the last of Xena's emotional walls crumble at their feet. What remained was a woman. Not a warrior, or some bigger than life hero. Just a woman. Someone with needs and wants. Someone vulnerable. Gabrielle slid her left hand over Xena's shoulder and around her neck. She buried her fingers in her hair as she reached up on tip toe to lightly reclaim her mouth. Sliding her right hand around her companion's waist she pulled her in, deepening the kiss at the same time.

All of Xena's senses converged on those lips. The lips that she had longed to taste were now eagerly seeking hers. "I uh... think I'll go tend to the fire," Xena said as they finally broke away from each other. She realized that what she saw in Gabrielle's eyes was definitely NOT hero worship. It took all the willpower she could muster to turn her back on her and walk away, but she knew she had to give Gabrielle time. Time to be sure that this was what she really wanted. Because Xena knew that there would be no going back to simply being friends if either one of them faltered in the next step to this budding relationship.

Gabrielle stood in place for a moment -- transfixed. She couldn't believe what she just did. What Xena allowed her to do. 'Now what? Do I wait for her to make the next move?'

Both women fell into their established routine. Xena built up the fire as Gabrielle washed at the basin. She donned a clean shift and got into bed as Xena took her turn at the basin. Gabrielle moved to the far side of the bed, against the wall. She and Xena had slept together plenty of times in the past, but tonight would be different. Gabrielle could feel her own tension grow as Xena slipped into a clean shift and got under the covers. She felt herself holding her breath, not sure which way to turn.

Xena lay on her back, praying to the God Morpheus to take her. She could feel the tension emanating from Gabrielle, but was not sure what she could do. After a couple of long, agonizing minutes, Xena extended her left hand to Gabrielle and said softly, "C'mere." Gabrielle slowly inched her way towards Xena, allowing her friend to wrap a strong arm around her. She buried her face in Xena's shoulder, and both women eventually fell asleep.

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Chapter 05

Xena awoke as the first rays of light filtered through the trees and splashed across the room. 'I must be coming down with something,' she thought groggily to herself. She felt both extremely warm and chilled at the same time. It wasn't until she focused on her surroundings that she realized her dilemma. Sometime during the night, most of the covers had been tugged away from the right side of her body, leaving her exposed to the chill night air. Goose bumps played up her arm and leg.

Her left side, though, was radiating heat. All of the covers were bunched up there, obscuring the weight that had ensconced itself. Xena slowly and carefully peeled back the top edge of the covers and had a peek underneath. She found the heat source. 'Gabrielle.' Sometime during the night Gabrielle had, shall we say, mounted and buried herself into Xena's left side. Her right arm had dug itself under the warrior and her hand had a firm grasp of shift. Her left hand was cupping the bottom of Xena's left breast, while her head rested comfortably on top of it. Gabrielle was straddling her friend's left thigh, and to make matters worse, her left knee was planted firmly between Xena's legs. Xena found her second heat source.

It took only a moment's thought for Xena to realize that *this* would not be a good position for Gabrielle to be in when she woke up and found Xena lying awake. 'What am I gonna do?' Xena tried to come up with a plan of action. 'Or better yet, maybe a plan of inaction. If I just lie here and pretend to be sleeping, it will give Gabrielle a chance to wake up and extricate herself from me. And she will be none the wiser.' But Xena knew that if Gabrielle found herself in this predicament, she would be so embarrassed and guilty that it might seriously jeopardize their relationship before it even got started.

'Nope. Plan A is out. Hmm... Plan B. I could possibly wiggle myself out from under the bard. She *is* a heavy sleeper and I've gotten out of tighter spots than this before.' Xena pondered this plan for a few moments. 'Let's see. Should I remove her hand from my breast first, or her knee from -'

At this precise moment Gabrielle stirred a little, grinding her knee into the warrior.

'Oh Gods!' Xena screamed to herself, as she bit into her lower lip. 'Her knee -- definitely her knee.' Xena fought every muscle in her body, trying to stay in control. 'But what if she wakes up? Gods, what would she think I was doing?' Xena tried to play the scenario out in her mind. She tried to see it through Gabrielle's innocent eyes. 'She could think I was... well... trying to have my way with her.' Xena cringed at the thought. 'Especially if she knew I'd been with other women. And not all of them by their own choosing. I would lose her for sure.'

Xena focused all of her energy on the problem at hand, trying hard to ignore the other hand that was still cupped under her breast. 'Ah, Plan C. This will require precise timing and placement.' Ever so carefully Xena peeled back the covers, exposing all of Gabrielle. She slowly reached over to the bard with her right hand, two fingers extended in the same position she used to apply pressure points. Xena knew it was now or never. With a slight arch of her back to uncover the arm that Gabrielle had buried under the warrior, she reached over and found the bard's most ticklish spot.

Gabrielle was airborne. Xena dove for the floor and executed a perfect tuck and roll and came up in a crouch in front of the fireplace. With lightening speed, she retrieved the poker from against the wall and was tending the fire when Gabrielle's eyes flew open, her scream still emanating from her lungs.

"XEEENA!?!" Gabrielle was crouched on top of the bed in a defensive posture. "What the -- where -- my Gods!!!" Her eyes were wide with fear. She was sure she was being attacked.

"Gabrielle. Are you OK?" Xena was over to the bed immediately, trying to comfort her friend. "You must have been having a nightmare. Everything's OK now." She cradled her trembling love in her arms, feeling guilty for what she had just done. Then she thought again of the alternatives, and knew this was for the best.

After a few minutes Gabrielle calmed down, but still held onto Xena. "I guess it was a nightmare," she mumbled, her face still buried in the protective warmth of her warrior. "I don't even remember it."

"That's for the best then," Xena replied. Then the woman of few words spent time talking in calming and hushed tones, stroking Gabrielle's hair and assuring her everything was alright.

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The rest of the morning proved to be much less eventful. They spent a quiet breakfast in the tavern and had their bags packed and settled on Argo. There was a cool crispness to the morning air, and the dew was still settled when they quietly left the town. Gabrielle, as usual, preferred to walk. Even though this slowed them down somewhat, Xena didn't mind. She had calculated that at this pace, they would still reach their destination on time.

Gabrielle spent the morning regaling Xena with story after story. Xena was certain that this was the best part of the trip. The stories Gabrielle told during these times they spent alone together were not the same stories she told when she had an audience. Audiences always seemed to want to hear of the exploits of Xena, Warrior Princess. And Gabrielle usually obliged them. Xena, on the other hand, always felt awkward hearing about herself. She preferred to hear about the exploits of others.

After a stop along the side of the road to rest Argo and enjoy a leisurely lunch, the two continued on their way. "Where is it that we're heading?" Gabrielle asked again.

"Torone," replied Xena. "I got word that a week ago a terrible storm blew through the village. I promised Yannis that if he ever needed help, I'd be there."

"And Yannis -- he was in your army?"

"He was a lieutenant," Xena responded. 'And one of the few people from that time I still consider a friend.' "He gave up that life and is now a farmer."

"Did the storm do much damage?"

"It destroyed some of his crops and leveled his silo. They've already salvaged what crops they could, but I want to help him in the rebuilding." The genuine compassion Gabrielle had for somebody she did not even know touched Xena, and made her feel even more guilty for the story she was feeding her. 'I know I should tell her the truth. She's not a child anymore.' Xena just couldn't bring herself to admit to Gabrielle where they were really heading. They spent the better part of the afternoon talking about everything and nothing.

Gabrielle, for her part, was loving life to its fullest. Except for the minor altercation she had this morning with demons from her sleep, the last twenty-four hours were the best time she had in her life. 'Xena treated me like an adult when she thought there might be trouble. Then she volunteered a night's stay at the inn. She even spent the entire afternoon with me at the marketplace, at her suggestion.' Gabrielle turned these bits of information over and over in her head. 'Things really have changed in the last two years, but when?' It had been such a slow process that Gabrielle couldn't pinpoint the beginning. 'I guess I just wore her down.'

Gabrielle continued to chew on these thoughts and others, and the more she chewed, the less palpable they became. 'Is this change in Xena something she wanted, or is she merely giving in to my constant prodding?' Gabrielle began to work the events of the last twenty-four hours over in her mind again, in light of this new thought. Looking back, Gabrielle was now sure that the real reason Xena left her alone at the dance was so that she would have been more approachable. 'If Xena really loved me, she wouldn't have allowed that to happen. She wanted me in the arms of someone else. Anyone else but her. She stated herself that had she known I couldn't dance, she would have shown me in time for the dance, so that I could have accepted the offer to dance from that man.'

Xena noted that it was quiet. Too quiet. She glanced behind to see if the bard was still there. What she saw concerned her. Gabrielle was scuffling along, head down, brows knitted together. She appeared to be holding a conversation with herself. Her mouth worked at forming words, but none came out. "Gabrielle," Xena called back to her friend. There was no response.

Gabrielle chewed harder on these new thoughts, and a bitter taste was forming in her mouth. Remembering last evening, she realized that during the entire dance lesson, Xena had kept a respectable distance between them. '*I* was the one who first instigated contact. *I* kissed her.

Xena slowed Argo. She was becoming more concerned. She knew it wasn't unusual for Gabrielle to sometimes go off into a world of her own; Xena always thought that was where some of her bard's best stories came from. 'But it's not the smartest thing to do when you're out on the road. Even if you do have the warrior princess to keep you safe.' Xena watched as Gabrielle came abreast of her and Argo, and continued on, oblivious of her surroundings. "Gabrielle?" Xena called out. Again there was no response.

'Gods, I'm so confused,' Gabrielle cried to herself. It was then that she looked up and realized that Xena and Argo were no longer in front of her. She panicked and gripped her staff with both hands spinning wildly around. There, some thirty paces behind her, sat Xena on Argo. A look of total confusion was evident on both women's faces. "Xena. What are you..." Gabrielle did not finish the sentence. She merely started to head back the way she came.

Xena urged Argo on and met her half way. "Gabrielle. Are you OK?" Xena tried to figure out what was on her friend's mind to no avail.

"Uh, yeah. I guess so," the bard said, wobbling slightly where she stood. She leaned on her staff for support.

"You don't look so good. You're as pale as a ghost." Xena was now really concerned for her friend. 'She seemed fine just a little while ago.' "Give me your hand," she instructed Gabrielle.

"No Xena, really. I'm fine."

"Gabrielle. You're pale as a ghost and you can barely stand. Now give me your hand." Xena gave her that look. She was not going to take no for an answer.

The last thing Gabrielle wanted was to make physical contact with Xena, but she understood the look she was getting from the warrior. There would be no questioning her command. She finally relented, and soon found herself easily plucked from the earth and sitting behind Xena. Gabrielle sat as far back in the saddle as was possible, and tentatively held onto the warrior at the sides of her waist with just her fingertips. She prayed to any God that was willing to listen to not let her fall off.

Xena was not sure what was going on behind her, but she needed to feel Gabrielle to know that she was still there and alright. Momentarily dropping the reins, Xena reached behind herself with both hands and grasped her young friend's hands in hers. She wrapped Gabrielle's arms around her waist, and clasped both her wrists firmly in one hand.

Gabrielle never had a chance. Before she knew it, she was pressed tightly against the back that she had tried so hard to distance herself from. She flushed with desire as Xena urged Argo on, and the rhythmic movement of the warrior's body rubbed against hers.

"There's a quiet clearing a few miles up the road," Xena commented more to herself than Gabrielle. "We'll stop there for the evening."

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Chapter 06

Xena normally didn't mind the quiet, but not at the expense of her friend. Gabrielle had been distant and withdrawn the entire evening. She still went about her chores helping to set up camp, but hardly a word was spoken between the two. Xena went off to lay her traps, and ended up bringing a nice sized skinned and dressed rabbit back to camp. Gabrielle quietly accepted it, and roasted it to perfection as usual. When Xena noticed from across the fire that Gabrielle did nothing more than pick at her food, Xena did the only thing she could think of. Gabrielle watched as Xena went over to the saddle bags and rummaged around inside. She returned and sat next to Gabrielle. Xena waited in silence. Slowly, Gabrielle raised her eyes and met Xena's. Xena smiled and handed her a cloth bag.

Gabrielle hesitantly accepted it, not sure just what was going on. She looked back into the warrior's blue eyes, lost again in the ocean before her. Gulping hard, she forced her eyes from Xena and to the package in her lap. She reached inside and wrapped her hand around a familiar object. Her eyes lit up as she extracted an entire loaf of nutbread from the cloth bag. "Xena! Where did you get... You got this from Androniki, didn't you?" Gabrielle asked and answered her own question.

"I knew how much you liked the stuff. So when I went up to get you a slice, I informed her that I was hoping she would still have a loaf left to sell me later on. I'm not sure, but I think I may have been a little intimidating. She answered yes so quickly and emphatically, you'd have thought I was going to burn the town to the ground if she had refused."

"Well Xena, you can sometimes be a little scary, even when you don't mean to." Gabrielle watched Xena for her response, already regretting her comment.

"Gab... I've never... I've never scared you, have I?" Xena wasn't sure she wanted to hear the answer.

"Well... uh..."

"When!?!"

"Do you remember when we first started traveling together? You could be very intimidating when you wanted your way. At first you scared me. Earlier today when you wanted me to ride with you and I refused... What would you have done if I hadn't given in?"

"I... " Xena didn't know how to answer. She never even considered the possibility that she would be refused. "You know I would never hurt you."

Gabrielle tried to reassure her. "Oh Xena, I know you never would." She reached out and touched her forearm. "But Androniki and the others don't know this. When you've got that look, you can be very intimidating."

Both women sat in silence, absorbed in their own thoughts. Xena was in shock. 'How could I have not known how I made her feel? I love her.' Xena was sure she could feel her heart being ripped from her chest. Her insides churned and she was positive she was going to be physically sick. 'Gabrielle's been acting strange all afternoon. Has she changed her mind about us and is too afraid to tell me? Gods! What does she think I'd do to her?' "Gabrielle? I know something is bothering you." Xena tried to speak in as calm and reassuring a voice as she could. "When you're ready to talk about it, I'll be here for you." Xena got up and went back to the other side of the fire.

Gabrielle just sat there, her emotions in flux. She loved Xena so much. 'But does she love me? How could she love a simple girl from Poteidaia? I'm not even sure how to love another woman.' Gabrielle absentmindedly broke off a hunk of the nutbread and began to eat. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until her first mouthful. Gabrielle smiled to herself. Xena never failed to do the little things that showed her how much she really cared. 'Xena is truly a good friend, but could she be more?' Gabrielle decided she needed to know.

She got up and crossed to Xena's side of the fire. Wordlessly she sat and offered her a piece of nutbread. Xena dutifully accepted. She had already learned her lesson when it came to defying her young friend. "Xena?"

"Mm?"

"About last night."

Xena froze. She knew this was coming. 'Hell, I even asked for it.' Xena knew she owed it to her friend to look her in the eye, but she just couldn't do it. She continued to stare into the fire. "Yes Gabrielle?"

"You left me alone on purpose at that dance, didn't you?" It was more a statement of fact than a question. She didn't give Xena a chance to respond. "You set me up. Why, Xena? Why?"

Xena sat there, not sure of how to answer. She wanted to tell Gabrielle that it broke her heart to leave her alone there. That she loved her and that it was all a big mistake. 'But if she is having second thoughts, I need to give her a way out.' "I thought it was for the best. You deserve better than me."

"*You* thought it was for the best?" Gabrielle grabbed Xena by the shoulders and spun her around to face her. The startled warrior's first instinct was to strike back, but she caught herself in time and quietly allowed the bard to vent her frustrations. Gabrielle seized her chin in her hand and thrust Xena's face up to meet hers. "Did you ever stop to consider what *I* thought was for the best?! No! I'm not a little girl, Xena. I know what I want. I want you..." Gabrielle continued to hold Xena's gaze. "I love you."

"I never thought you had any feelings for me in that way. I was afraid that if I admitted my feelings, I'd lose you." Xena tried to look away, but Gabrielle had a lock on her eyes that she could not break. "And then today -- you were acting so strangely. I thought maybe you changed your mind and didn't know how to tell me."

"Oh Xena." Gabrielle released the death grip she still had on the warrior's chin and cupped her cheek in her palm. "I had talked myself into believing that you didn't love me. Why do we do this to each other? You've got to tell me what you're thinking. I don't know if I can take much more of this."

"I wasn't the only one to hold back on my feelings. And you. A bard," Xena allowed a little lopsided grin to cross her face.

"Heh... well... you know this bard stuff can be hard work sometimes." Gabrielle's eyes twinkled at the sight of the smile on her friend's face. "Xena?"

"Yes Gabrielle?"

"I'm starved." With these two words, Xena knew she had her friend back for sure.

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The next two days were spent in their usual routine. Up early in the morning, and after a quick breakfast, off on the road. A stop for lunch, and on again until dinner. They passed other travelers on the road, but mercifully there was no trouble. In the evening, Xena would find a quiet spot off the main road, where they made camp. Gabrielle spent time writing in her scrolls, while Xena sat across the fire, catching up on some mending of her leathers, gauntlets and greaves.

If days were pleasant, the nights were even more so. With their bedrolls next to each other, they spent the time before sleep in each other's arms. Sometimes discussing the day's events, sometimes looking up at the stars dreaming, and sometimes not saying anything at all. Xena soon came to realize that Gabrielle's bold advances the night of the dance were short lived, as the bard quickly reverted to her normally modest ways. Even so, Xena found herself relishing the quiet kisses of her naturally curious friend and gave her all the time she needed to become comfortable with their new relationship.

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The third day was quickly looking like it would drop into the history books as a repeat of the last two when the sky opened up. It happened so quickly and with such intensity that it even caught Xena off guard. Slanted sheets of stinging rain began to pelt them down the front of their bodies. They were soaked before they had a chance. Still, Xena dismounted Argo and pulled their capes from their traveling bags. "Here," Xena shouted, trying to be heard over the din of the storm. She wrapped one of the capes protectively around Gabrielle. "It's too late to stay dry," she laughed, "but at least it'll help absorb the sting of this rain." She quickly wrapped the other cape around herself.

Tugging on Xena's arm to get her attention Gabrielle pleaded, "We've got to turn back."

Xena turned her back to the storm and stood squarely in front of her companion, trying to block her from the incoming stabs of rain. "I wish we could," Xena replied, looking into the eyes of the woman she loved. "We haven't passed any suitable shelter in three candle marks. And we'd never be able to out run this storm. Our best chance is to head into it, and hope to break through to the other side."

Gabrielle couldn't hear every word Xena said, but she heard enough to understand what direction they were headed in. She squeezed Xena's arm and nodded her head in the affirmative, too exhausted to try to shout. She didn't particularly like this plan, but knew Xena would do anything to keep her safe. That's why she was positive she must have not heard Xena correctly, when the warrior shouted out the next part of her plan. "Repeat that!" Gabrielle looked at Xena incredulously.

"I said," Xena raised her voice as she bent closer to Gabrielle's ear. "I want you to ride up front with me on Argo!"

"Yep! That's what I thought you said," she shot back, grabbing the front of Xena's cape for emphasis. "No way -- uh uh -- sorry. I'm not getting up there."

"You've got to ride if we're going to make it through."

"Fine. Then I'll ride in back."

"You won't be safe. I'll need two hands on Argo's reins and it's just too slippery. I won't take that chance. Please." Xena executed a fine argument, but that last word was all it took. Gabrielle planted a kiss on Xena's cheek as she gave her a quick hug. They walked over to where the mare was impatiently waiting. "Sorry for ignoring you girl," Xena said, as she patted the flank of her horse. "I'll get us out of this." Argo turned to look at her, too miserable to respond. Xena turned her attention back to Gabrielle. "I'm going to lift you up first, then mount behind you. Hold on to the saddle horn when you get up there."

Gabrielle turned her back to Xena, expecting her friend to give her a boost so she could throw her leg over the saddle, when Xena spun her around and swiftly lifted her up so she was sitting side-saddle. The sudden change in altitude caught Gabrielle by surprise, and she clung to the saddle horn for all she was worth as Xena swung up in the saddle next to her. "This wasn't exactly what I had in mind," Gabrielle shouted, as her left hand frantically grasped Xena's arm for support. She watched as Xena wordlessly opened her cape to the storm to accept her to her body. Gabrielle didn't need a written invitation. She buried herself into the front of the warrior, disappearing into the folds of Xena's cape. With her trembling package securely fastened around her waist, Xena headed straight into the storm.

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Chapter 07

The flicker of light through the trees ahead was a welcome sight for Xena. They had successfully made it through to the other side of the storm and the rain had eased up significantly. Gabrielle was still nowhere in sight. She hadn't come up for air since she buried herself into the warrior, and Xena didn't have the heart to disturb her. She silently headed for the light.

"Gabrielle. Gabrielle? C'mon. Time to wake up." Xena spoke quietly into the bundle she uncovered when she opened her cape. They had stopped in front of an inn in a small village. 'I can't believe what this girl can sleep through,' Xena mused to herself. She stroked the bard's back with her right hand, while her partner's head slowly raised itself from the left side of Xena's chest.

Very bleary green eyes came within inches of sparkling blue ones. Gabrielle tried to focus. Xena let out a chuckle at the sight of her friend, her breath tickling the back of Gabrielle's throat. "Wha's so funny?" she managed to get out.

"Oh... I'm sorry. It's just that... well... you look like a drowned rat," Xena animated, as tears of laughter rolled down her cheeks.

"Well, you try burying yourself under all of this," Gabrielle replied, indicating both her and Xena's capes. "I think I sweated off at least five pounds!" She leaned back and slowly filled her lungs with cold fresh air, trying to clear the fog from her brain. Looking around she continued, "Where are we?"

"I've found us an inn for the night. There's not a dry place to camp for miles." Gabrielle warmed quickly to the thought of a *dry* bed. Xena quickly dismounted and helped Gabrielle slide down into her waiting arms.

"Ooo, I'm stiff." Gabrielle stood on wobbly legs, rolling her head trying to get the kinks out. "I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I think I could use a hot bath."

"Then a hot bath it is. I don't think you could get any wetter, but the soak will help to loosen your muscles. Why don't you get us a room while I stable Argo."

"Sure thing." The thought of getting out of this rain was music to her ears. She accepted her staff, which Xena had retrieved and assembled, and headed for the warmth of the inn. The perceived notion of pending warmth was soon forgotten as Gabrielle entered the inn. Silence hung in the air as the dinner crowd and the innkeeper turned to eye the stranger. It dawned on Gabrielle that the long black cape and hood covering her face were the cause, so she quickly threw back the hood and opened the cape, hoping to belie their fears.

Small murmured whispers passed amongst the dinner patrons, as the innkeeper still regarded her with a critical eye. Gabrielle donned her best bardic smile as she approached him. "Hi. I'd like to rent a room for the night."

The innkeeper openly eyed Gabrielle up and down, pausing too long at her bare mid-riff and small green halter top. Gabrielle started to feel like a side of beef, being considered for purchase. She looked away to the dinner patrons, unable to meet the eyes that were now boring through her. It was then that she realized that every other woman in the inn was covered from head to foot. The only skin showing was their hands and face. Gabrielle self-consciously wrapped her cape back around herself.

"Are you alone?" the innkeeper asked, his eyes once again roaming over Gabrielle, recalling the sight.

"No. I'm waiting for -"

"Well then, Missy," he interrupted. "Why don't you have a seat and wait for your man to get here." He wasn't used to dealing with women folk, and was real curious as to what kind of a man would let his woman run around half naked.

"If it's all the same to you, I'd like a room now." Gabrielle was soaked and exhausted, and was simply not in the mood for this. "And besides," she added, "the 'he' I'm waiting for is a 'she'."

A look of disgust replaced the leer on the innkeeper's face. "I run a family business. Why don't you two take it back outside in the woods, with the rest of the animals."

"My friend and I just want a room for the night. We don't want any trouble."

"I bet that's not all your *friend* wants," the drunk at the bar to Gabrielle's right slurred. "Maybe a little midnight snack too, hum?" He leaned over and suggestively fingered the front of her cape.

Gabrielle disgustedly tore away from the offense, and glared at the people gawking at her.

"We ain't got no room for the likes of you," the innkeeper said, wiping his hands on a dirty cloth. "You best be on your way. Now get out of my inn."

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Gabrielle ran from the inn and straight into the arms of a startled Xena, who reflexively dropped their bags on the ground and embraced her back. Gabrielle didn't mean to, but tears came as she clung to her. She berated herself for not taking care of the situation, but she was just too tired to think straight. "Gabrielle! What's the matter? Are you hurt?" Xena pulled her friend off of her, and carefully checked her over in the moonlight.

"No, I'm fine." She grasped the warrior's hands, stopping the examination. "The innkeeper... he... he wouldn't rent me a room."

"Wouldn't?" Xena raised Gabrielle's face to meet hers. "Are you sure you understood him correctly?"

"Oh yeah. I understood him just fine. He said he doesn't rent rooms out to our kind."

"Our kind?" Xena heard herself again repeating what the bard just told her, but she didn't believe getting a room for the night was going to end up being such a big deal. Xena's voice lowered into a growl. "What did he mean by *our kind*?"

"He assumed I was traveling with a man, and when I corrected him, he said he ran a family business and that we should take it back outside with the rest of the animals."

Xena saw red. "C'mon, Gabrielle. Let's get us a room." Xena grabbed their bags and entered the inn, keeping Gabrielle protectively behind her.

The tall black caped figure just stood there, eyeing the innkeeper from the folds of the hood. The innkeeper stood there for a moment, thinking that maybe he had heard the little girl wrong. She was obviously with a man after all. He started to relax a little, trying to think of an appropriate way to apologize for his earlier remarks, when Xena dropped their bags, pushed the hood back off her face and threw off her cape.

"Xena!" Gabrielle pleaded, as she tried to put a restraining hand on the warrior's arm. Xena's name echoed as it passed along the lips of the patrons. There were also reverberations of Warrior Princess, Warlord, and murderer.

Xena thought about taking care of this in a polite manner, but she was cold and tired and hungry and wet. 'And a cold, tired, hungry and *wet* warrior doesn't know the meaning of polite,' she grimly reminded herself. The bar, which was the only protection the innkeeper had between himself and a very pissed off warrior soon disappeared as Xena vaulted it and had him pinned up against the back wall. Her actions were so quick he was still holding the drink he had just poured. "Thanks," Xena drawled, as she took the drink and downed it with one swallow. "Don't mind if I do." She placed the empty mug on the counter to her right, and slammed her right hand on the wall, just inches away from his head. She leaned into him, her whole body a breath away from his. He was forced to look straight up to meet her glare, and the water from her hair slowly dripped onto his face.

With her left hand, Xena executed a little maneuver she had learned from her warlord days. It wasn't lethal, but prolonged use could cause disability. It was also a great attention getter. If done right, it was subtle enough not to call attention to itself from anybody else watching. And Xena didn't want her young friend to see her inflicting any pain. She slid her left hand between them and gathered a handful of his baggy pants at his waist. With a simple twist of her wrist and a raising of her forearm, Xena let his own pants put a strangle hold on his manhood. She lifted her forearm another inch, and the poor man was now attempting to support as much of his weight as he could on his toes.

"I thought you were in the business of renting rooms," Xena hissed through clenched jaws. She ratcheted her left forearm up a few more degrees, and he could quickly feel his manhood disintegrate.

"I run a clean -- respectable family business," he managed to get past the lump in his throat. He was too scared to think what that lump might actually be. "I didn't want any trouble."

"Well, you've got a funny way of showing it. Now, my friend asked politely about a room. Now it's my turn. I'd like a room." Xena's arm ratcheted up a degree. "And hot baths." Ratchet. "And hot food." Ratchet. "And drink." Ratchet. By this time all he could do was violently shake his head yes. Words were beyond his comprehension to form. "Thanks," Xena smiled. She patted him on the right side of his face, as she lowered him back to the floor.

Xena lifted her head and straightened her shoulders back to her full six feet, and fluidly walked around the bar and back to where Gabrielle was still standing. She nonchalantly gathered her cape and their bags from her friend, and placing a protective arm around her love, led her to the stairs. There they followed the now wincing innkeeper as he showed them to their room. No one in the crowded room below dared to comment on the physical contact the warrior was showing her friend as they ascended the stairs.

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Chapter 08

"Here," the innkeeper meekly said, as he showed them into their room. Using the candle he carried, he went about the room lighting candles. He then proceeded to the fireplace, where he attempted to get a fire started. He found it increasingly difficult to do so, while trying to keep an eye on the warrior. He was scared for his life now that he was alone with her.

"I'll get that," Xena barked at him. She appreciated the way he almost jumped out of his skin at the sound of her voice. 'Very reassuring.' She smiled. He turned to her but would not make eye contact. "I want a tub with plenty of hot water brought to the room. And hot food and drink. And plenty of extra blankets and towels," she added as an afterthought. When she realized the man was still standing there she finished, "Now!" He was out the door in a flash.

"Wow! That must have been some look you gave him." Gabrielle stood there looking at Xena in wide-eyed wonderment. "He wouldn't even look you in the eye. Must have been a real attention grabber."

"Yeah. You could say that." Xena chuckled as she realized that the entire time the innkeeper was in the room, he never took his eyes off her left hand. "A real attention grabber."

Xena soon had a fire going. "Here, give me that thing." She walked over to Gabrielle and lifted the soggy cape from her shoulders. "This thing weighs a ton." She dragged two chairs over to the fire, and laid the capes as close as she dared. Xena returned to her friend and directed her to sit on the edge of the bed. She pulled the blanket from the bed and draped it over Gabrielle's shoulders. Gabrielle just sat there. All her strength had seeped from her body. And to top it off, she had a pounding headache.

"Let me give you a hand. We've got to get you out of these wet clothes." Xena knelt before her, and worked on getting her boots off. The wet leather laces stubbornly complied after a few strong tugs. Xena then went to work on the laces of her top and finally her skirt. For Gabrielle's part, she simply obeyed Xena's commands to lift her arms, stand and sit. When Xena was done, she had a beautiful, naked, freezing bard sitting before her. Xena wrapped the blanket around her trembling friend and began to vigorously rub her arms and legs, doing what she could to generate heat. A tentative knock on the door stopped her efforts.

Xena made sure Gabrielle was properly covered and called, "Come in." She stood and turned, putting herself between her friend and the door. When Xena saw that the tub had arrived, she moved the chairs with the wet capes to the side of the fireplace, and directed the two young men to place the tub in front of the fireplace. They quickly did as instructed, and proceeded to make numerous trips to the hallway to retrieve buckets of hot water. When the tub was full, they brought even more buckets in and placed them near the fire. As they were readying to leave, one of the young men eyed the young woman's clothes strewn about the floor and met the icy cold stare of the warrior. Grabbing his friend by the arm, they beat a hasty retreat. As soon as they exited, two young girls appeared at the open door.

From their ruddy complexion and round, freckled faces, Xena knew they had to be daughters of the innkeeper. "Come in," she called to them. They hesitated for a moment, not sure they loved their father anymore for sticking them with this chore. Xena saw the normal signs of fear that she evoked, and gave them a warm smile as she sat on the bed next to Gabrielle. She hoped the change in her height would also help to put them at ease. The older girl entered first with a tray laden with food. She placed it on the small table inside the door. The younger girl still stood rooted in the doorway. Xena gave her a winning smile and said, "C'mer." The girl automatically obeyed, a smile spreading across her face. Xena took the blankets and towels offered her, and placed them on the bed behind her.

"Kristin, come here!" her older sister begged. She wanted to get out of the room before that warrior ate them for dinner.

"Kyra, she's nice! I told you she wouldn't eat us!" Kyra just looked at her younger sister, not believing that she had just let the warrior woman know her deepest, darkest fear.

"Eat you!?!" Gabrielle startled them both with a laugh as she playfully punched Xena on the upper arm. "What have people been filling your imaginations with?" she wondered out loud. Kristin quickly backed away from the two women, not sure she wanted to be witness to what the warrior would do in retaliation for being struck. She stopped cold when she saw Xena place her arm around the strawberry blonde haired woman and give her a gentle squeeze.

"Kyra. Please give your father a message from me. Tell him thank you for the quick service, and that I don't want to be disturbed. You can come for the dinner dishes tomorrow." Both girls nodded and quickly left.

"So now you eat children," Gabrielle admonished her. "Since when was there a change in your diet?"

"Two moons ago. Didn't I mention it? A mystic healer told me I should get more young meat in my diet."

"I think she meant veal and lamb."

"Oh. Now you tell me." Both women erupted into fits of laughter.

"Xena, where do they come up with these stories?" Gabrielle asked, as she wiped a tear from her face.

"I don't know, Gab But they never cease to amaze me." Xena stood in front of Gabrielle and helped her to her feet. "Now, let's get you in that tub before the water turns cold." She unwrapped the precious bundle before her and took the now damp blanket and Gabrielle's clothes to lay them by the fire.

Gabrielle made a beeline for the tub. "Oh, Xena. I didn't think it could feel so good to get wet all over again." Gabrielle slowly lowered her tired limbs into the hot water.

Xena brought the tray of food over to the tub. "We best eat this while it's hot. I'm not in the mood to have to go downstairs to get it reheated." Xena handed her friend a hot bowl of stew while she quickly peeled herself out of her wet leathers and wrapped a blanket around herself. She settled herself next to the tub and the two quietly ate their meal.

Gabrielle used the last of the bread to sop up the remaining broth in her bowl. "That was really good! Even though he is a royal pain in the -"

"Gabrielle!"

"Well he is, Xena. Like I was saying. Even though he's a *royal pain* he certainly serves a fine meal. I didn't realize how hungry I was. All I could think of earlier was a nice, warm, dry bed. Now look at me. Sitting in a tub pickling my skin and stuffing my face!" Xena reached in the tub and ran her fingers through the water. "Hey! You getting fresh with me?"

"Only if you ask nicely," Xena teased. She got up from the floor and retrieved the kettle of hot water she had placed over the fire. She carefully added it to the tub. "Here," Xena said, taking the bar of soap in her hands. "Let me wash your hair." She knelt behind Gabrielle and lathered her hands. She gathered the strawberry blonde tresses in her hands and proceeded to wash Gabrielle's hair, as well as gently massage her neck and temples.

"Ouch! No, no. Don't stop. That feels sooo good. Yes... a little to the right. That's the spot." Gabrielle leaned back into Xena, allowing the warrior healer's magic fingers to release the tension that had been building in her head. Xena was more than happy to oblige. 'I don't think I've ever been more pampered in my entire life.' This was yet another side to Xena that she never bothered to try to explain to anybody. They would never believe her. It would surprise people to learn how gentle her hands could be. How the same fingers that were calloused from years of fighting, held such healing powers.

The crackle and spittle from the fire and an occasional murmured whimper from Gabrielle when Xena's fingers found a tender spot were the only sounds emanating from the small room. Xena was entranced by the sounds coming from Gabrielle. She closed her eyes and imagined how she could make other sounds escape those beautiful lips. 'Just a small kiss here. And maybe another one there. My tongue running down her... mmm... delicious. And her... Ooo between my fingers... squeezing... pinching. Feeling her... so wet. Taking her. Yes!'

The rhythm of the massage Gabrielle was receiving had changed a few minutes ago, replaced with long, smooth, slow strokes. She had almost drifted off to sleep then, relaxed and lulled into a beautiful dream. Suddenly her heart skipped a beat and her eyes widened when she felt more than heard a ragged breath escape Xena. Xena's hands had traveled down her neck, over her shoulders, and were now pliantly massaging her upper arms. Down and back up. Down and back up, Xena's hands worked the flesh of her arms. Xena was leaning further into Gabrielle, her head pressed up alongside her love's head, lips a breath away from her right ear.

'Oh my Gods,' Gabrielle cried to herself, as she felt the muscles in her upper thighs constrict. 'This is no time for a cramp.' Try as she might, she had no idea how to relieve it, and had no idea of it's true source. Another ragged breath escaped Xena's lips. 'My, it's getting mighty warm in here.' Gabrielle giggled softly. She knew where the source of *that* was coming from. 'Xena.' Xena, who now had her earlobe in her mouth, and was lightly sucking and biting on it. Xena, whose hands never ceased in their tireless efforts to touch and manipulate her arms, then back up to her shoulders and now down to her - "Oh... GODS," Gabrielle groaned, as she found her body arching to meet the warrior's latest assault on her flesh. She turned her head and captured Xena's mouth, feeling the power of Xena's lips crush into hers.

For Xena's part, she hadn't realized that it had progressed beyond a simple massage until Gabrielle's lips found hers. Until then, she was content to simply enjoy her innocent fantasy. Gabrielle's lips brought her back to reality, and she was startled to realize her fantasy had spilled over when she felt soft and responsive breasts under her hands. Xena yanked her hands from the bard and pushed herself away from the tub. "Gabrielle... I'm so sorry... I... I didn't realize..." She looked down and examined her hands, wondering how they could have betrayed her.

Gabrielle spun around and watched as the warrior sat there transfixed on her hands. Her mind raced to think of what to say to bring Xena back to her. She had started something that her body needed to have finished. "Xena. Xena..." Gabrielle waited for what seemed like an eternity for Xena to meet her eyes. She extended her hand and said simply, "Please."

Xena could see the desire in Gabrielle's eyes, and felt her own passion growing. She reached for the offered hand and lightly brushed fingertips. The connection was magnetic. She found herself drawn into those sea-mist green eyes, and slowly covered the distance. "Gabrielle, I don't want to -" All thought was lost as Gabrielle brushed her lips over the warrior's again and again.

"Xena. You didn't do anything I didn't want you to do." She slid her hands around Xena's neck and pulled her in. Their lips met, and Gabrielle could feel her nipples cry out as they rubbed on the metal surface of the tub. She grasped Xena's hands and slowly pivoted in the tub, allowing her head to fall back on the warrior's chest. With slow, deliberate movements she brought Xena's hands around her neck and down her chest, breaking the surface of the water and urging them on. "Xena... please," Gabrielle begged, as she urged the warrior's hands over her soft flesh.

Xena marveled at the boldness of the bard as she felt small hands pressing hers down. She leaned into Gabrielle and began to slowly massage her breasts. Gabrielle pushed back into the warrior and arched her back as she turned and found her lips. Xena savored the taste of Gabrielle's lips with her tongue, and with a small flick, was soon sweeping it over her bard's teeth. Gabrielle started to say Xena's name, and that was all the enticement Xena needed, as Gabrielle swiftly found a large, warm tongue battling hers for space in her mouth. Xena's tongue was like a small child's; inquisitive, exploring every recess, touching and tasting. Gabrielle moaned deeply, clutching the rim of the tub with white knuckles. Xena responded by lavishing more attention on the now erect nipples below the surface of the water. She rolled them between her fingers as Gabrielle's body was propelled further and further into Xena's expert hands.

"Xena... Please!" the bard begged, as Xena left her mouth and ventured around to taste her neck. She lingered over the taut skin of her partner's arched neck for a moment, before beginning to trail hot kisses down to the water's edge. Gabrielle, fearful that Xena would stop once she reached the water, thrust her body upwards. Her breasts broke the surface of the water like two newly formed islands. This was an unneeded move on the bard's part. Xena was already willing to drown to get to her targets of desire and had no intention of stopping when her tongue hit the water.

Xena knew this was Gabrielle's first time with a woman, and she desperately wanted to be as gentle as possible with her. Even though she had been with Perdicus for one night, Xena was not sure what he had showed her, since Gabrielle had always been bashful when it came to matters of intimacy. All of these wonderful, rational thoughts were soon lost on Xena as she witnessed those two beautiful breasts heaving to meet her. She descended teeth first to meet the right one, biting the hard nipple with uncontrollable lust.

"Xena!... Oh... Gods!... XENA!" Gabrielle panted, trying to force air past her scorched throat and into her lungs. "PLEASE!" She strained to force more of herself between Xena's teeth. The muscles of her thighs were so constricted that you could have bounced a dinar off them. All of her weight was now being supported by her heels which she had dug into the bottom of the tub, and her hands, which had become permanent fixtures to its sides. When Xena stretched to lavish the same attention on the left breast, Gabrielle had her pleas answered. Xena's left breast brushed over the bard's cheek and fell into her waiting mouth. The feel of Xena's erect nipple in her mouth sent Gabrielle over the edge. Her screams may have been somewhat muffled at the time, but Xena felt them course through her body and she followed Gabrielle moments later.

Xena supported Gabrielle's now limp body, fearful she would simply slip under the water otherwise. "Xena?" Gabrielle whispered.

"I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

"I think my headache's gone." She looked up to see the lopsided grin on her lover's face.

"Oh, I can't wait to see my next patient's face when I try out my new remedy!"

"Don't you even think about it."

"No?"

"That one you save for me. And I feel like I'm going to have a sudden surge in headaches." She softly laughed as mock exasperation spread over Xena's face.

Gabrielle looked down at the puckered skin of her fingers and sobbed, "If I don't get out of this water soon, this may become permanent." She sat up under her own strength, and Xena retrieved a towel from the bed. Refusing to make eye contact with Xena as she returned, Gabrielle admitted with great embarrassment, "I... I don't think I can stand on my own."

Xena smiled apologetically, only now realizing the true effect she had on Gabrielle. "Let me help you." Xena slung the towel over her shoulder and stooped over the side of the tub, scooping Gabrielle up in her arms. She cradled the bard to her body and headed for the bed. There, she slid Gabrielle to her feet and with one arm supporting the bard under her shoulder, she proceeded to wrap the towel around her. Xena scooped her back up and gently placed her on the bed, lingering for a moment to steal a kiss. Before Gabrielle had a chance to return it, Xena broke away. "If you start something now," Xena sheepishly admitted, "I'll never get my bath."

"Xena! I completely forgot. Why didn't you remind me?"

Xena threw a guilty look over her shoulder as she headed to the fire for hot water. "I was a little preoccupied," she confessed. She filled the tub once again with hot water and made quick work of her bath.

Returning to the bed carrying two white shifts, she tossed one to Gabrielle. After drying herself with a towel, she snatched the bard's discarded towel and went to lay them by the fire to dry. "Xena. Could you bring me my satchel?"

"Sure." She returned and handed it to Gabrielle, who was now sitting with her back against the headboard. Xena sat cross-legged at the foot of the bed, combing her hair.

Gabrielle dug around the satchel a moment, and produced a small multicolored tin. She presented it to Xena. "What's this?" Xena inquired, as she worked the top off.

"Dessert!" Gabrielle beamed.

Xena's eyes lit up when she spotted the small treats. Where did you find them?"

"At the harvest festival. I know they're your favorite."

"They were my favorite," Xena corrected her, as she popped one in her mouth.

Gabrielle looked dejected. "Were?"

Xena leaned over and furnished Gabrielle with a long, smoldering kiss. "They've got stiff competition now," she husked, as they both came up for air. She proceeded to place one of the treats between Gabrielle's lips, and popped another one in her mouth. "But that doesn't mean we still can't enjoy them," she finished, smiling.

Xena added more wood to the fire before returning to bed and blowing out the last of the candles. She crawled under the covers and joined Gabrielle, who was lying with her back to Xena. Rolling onto her left side, Xena wrapped her right arm around her love's waist and pulled Gabrielle to her. She draped her arm around her chest and nestled her chin atop her head, realizing they were anatomically built for each other. Gabrielle flinched when Xena's hand brushed across her breast. "Gabrielle. Are you OK?" asked an alarmed Xena. "I didn't hurt you earlier, did I?" She instantly felt guilty about her aggressive actions during their lovemaking.

"Well... I am a little sore," she admitted. "But a nice sore," she added quickly, as she gave her friend's arm a reassuring squeeze.

"I'm so sorry. You should have told me. Do you want me to get you some salve?"

"No. I'll be fine. You know..." Gabrielle paused. She was glad she had her back to Xena. She wanted to be open with her, but knew that what she wanted to say she couldn't bring herself to say to Xena's face. "I never knew it could be so... so intense." Gabrielle could feel her face flush just thinking about it.

"But Perdicus?" Xena was all too aware of the one night Gabrielle had with him, though she normally tried to push it to the recesses of her mind.

"Well, he... ah... he knew it was my first time, and he was so sweet, so gentle." Gabrielle thought back to that night. "Too gentle," she admitted. "I never felt with him what I felt with you."

It suddenly dawned on Xena that what Gabrielle was trying to say was that she never achieved orgasm with Perdicus. 'But she did with me.' Xena smiled at this realization.

Gabrielle wiggled back a little further wanting contact with as much of Xena as she could possibly manage. "It can't get any better than this," she murmured more to herself than Xena.

"Just wait."

Gabrielle stiffened for an instant, and then relaxed as Xena pulled her in, enveloping her in warmth and love.

#xena #Xena Warrior Princess #Xena/Gabrielle #Xena/Gabrielle Fanfiction #fanfiction #xwp #mel/janice #mel/janice fanfiction #xena au

[elektramouthed]

 Breath is primary insofar as the spoken word is. The conception has a solid psychological and sensual basis in the daily experience of these people. For the inhabitants of an oral society live much more intimately blended with their surroundings than we do. [...] What is vital, in a world of sound, is to maintain continuity. [...] Breath is everywhere. There are no edges.  The breath of desire is Eros. Inescapable as the environment itself, with his wings he moves love in and out of all creatures at will. The individual’s total vulnerability to erotic influence is symbolized by those wings with their multisensual power to permeate and take control of a lover at any moment. Wings and breath transport Eros as wings and breath convey words: an ancient analogy between language and love is here apparent. [...] It is an analogy that makes perfect sense in the context of oral poetics, where Eros and the Muses clearly share an apparatus of sensual assault. [...] Written words, on the other hand, do not present such an all-persuasive sensual phenomenon. Literacy desensorializes words and reader. A reader must disconnect himself from the influx of sense impressions transmitted by nose, ear, tongue and skin if he is to concentrate upon his reading. A written text separates words from one another, separates words from the environment, separates words from the reader (or writer) and separates the reader (or writer) from his environment. Separation is painful. The evidence of epigraphy shows how long it takes people to systematize word-division in writing, indicating the novelty and difficulty of this concept. As separable, controllable units of meaning, each with its own visible boundary, each with its own fixed and independent use, written words project their user into isolation.  That words have edges is an insight most vivid, then, for the reader or writer of them.

Anne Carson, from Eros the Bittersweet

#anne carson #eros the bittersweet #nonfiction #essays #on literacy #on boundaries #2021 reads