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#but that's about it I guess? I just hate how he's portrayed when it comes to nonmutual art
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Starstruck
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A/N: yay! more kidnapper Nikolai! I'm thinking about making this into an actual chaptered fic with lore and shit instead of just random drabbles, but that's way in the future. for now, enjoy this brainrot.
Pairing: Kidnapper!Nikolai Gogol x fem!reader
Content: Nikolai sets up a wonderful date for the two of you down in the basement! And you realize that you may be developing some... unwanted feelings towards the jester.
Warnings: kidnapper au, stockholm syndrome, first person writing, mainly fluff<3
Words: 755
Oneshot under cut!
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I walked in from the bathroom to a scene of nothing but pure beauty. A blue hue reflected off the usually boring walls of the basement, courtesy of the projector Nikolai had wheeled into the room. The device was portraying something of a time lapse of the night sky, stars twinkling and spinning in their constellations. Blankets were spread out all across the floor, all of them having some sort of spacey print. Stars, the sun and moon, the solar system, comets, you name it, it was there.
Sat in the middle of the blankets with his back rested against the bed frame was Nikolai. He didn't look like Nikolai, though. No face paint, no crazy eyes or smile, no jester outfit. Just a normal man in his-you guessed it-space themed pyjamas, a stranger to the clown I had grown to know.
"You mentioned wanting to see the stars again" He stated simply, patting the empty space beside him. His tone was so foreign to me, sounding almost like an apology. "I figured, if I cannot bring you to the stars, I will bring the stars to you"
I was quick to join him, sliding my head into the crook of his shoulder and inhaling. He smelt different without all that makeup on, more like natural manly musky scent and less like a chemical sweatshop mixed with undertones of blood. "You remembered..." I mumbled, reaching a hand behind his back to play with the end of his braid. "Thank you"
"Of course! Anything for my love, my little space queen! Oh, and I have another little surprise for you, but that's for later! First, stargazing"
Nikolai rambled on, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me in close. Our legs tangled together in a messy heap, his bare feet brushing against mine. I made a note of how cold they felt.
I hummed in agreement, turning my attention back to the projection against the wall. I had always wondered about what was out there, beyond our universe. If there was life somewhere else, a whole world we didn't know about. Maybe it would be better than this one, well fuck, anything would be better than what I was currently going through. I'd choose living in space over Nikolais basement any day, anyone would.
To be free, Nikolai talked about that alot. About how this was freedom down here. Being free of any laws the government forced onto society, being free of judgement and hate. It was just me and him here, this was being free.
And there was something about the way his mismatched eyes stared into mine when he said it that made me want to believe him. That this was where I was meant to be. Moments like these only furthered that idea in my brain, and it was the worst feeling ever.
A shooting star flew across the screen, a flash of light in the night sky. It lit up Nikolais face like fairy-lights, and if I didn't know any better, I would have said he looked angelic. His white hair glowed blue in the light of the room, eyes sparkling, lips parted, and cheekbones sharp as knifes.
"Make a wish, Kolya" My body felt like it was moving on its own accord as I brought my hand up to cup his jaw, tracing my nail over his bottom lip. "It'll come true, you know"
Maybe this was what Stockholm Syndrome felt like, maybe that's why I felt so starstruck staring at this cold-blooded killer.
"My wish..." Nikolai trailed off, leaning into my touch and closing his eyes, a faint but genuine smile playing on his lips. "... does not matter. I have everything I need in my life right now. What is your wish, my dove?"
I pondered the question for a second. My real wish was to fly amongst the stars, but that was stupid. He'd just laugh if I told him that, and that would ruin this new found peace I liked so much. So, I lied. Told him something he would want to hear instead.
"I want you to show me that surprise you said about, that's my wish"
"Aha! Of course, come here"
His lips were on mine in a heartbeat, soft and slow, unlike every other time he had stolen a kiss from me. There was a strawberry taste on his lips, chapstick? Had he applied that just for this? Cute, so damn cute.
Shit, I was falling for the enemy.
21 notes · View notes
scoliosisgoblin · 2 months
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How comfortable are you when you ship your self insert / OC with YB but see others that is not your mutuals ship their sona / OC with YB?
I don't really care about shipping him with whoever. I'm more worried with how I and other portray him
I mean I'm constantly stressed when making yb content, wondering if I made him act in character or not
and I hate it when I'm scrolling on my fyp and I just see art of Peter and I know he'd never do/say any of that, but what the fuck am I supposed to do, tell them they don't know him ⁉️🙏🙏
imo, everyone's version of yb is different, BECAUSE he was made for you. since I love Rick and Morty, my version of yb would probably have already watched the show or would be willing to watch it with me. but if someone else hated it, their version of yb probably would reflect the same
(I spoke with Benny about this) like I hc Peter liking both classical music and goth, but because everyone's got different music tastes, he'd either already fit your mold or he'd try to by listening to what you like and teaching himself to like it and such
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aemondsbabe · 7 months
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Taunt
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obviously, i feel very normal and chill about ewan's new performance in saltburn. anyways lmao this is my version of michael gavey from the vibes i got from him in the 5 seconds he's in the trailer! i have no idea if this is accurate to how he is truly portrayed in the movie! if the movie comes out and i'm totally wrong, then i don't care bc i got to have fun writing about a cheeky lil oxford student!!
summary: you're nearly failing statistics and the student your professor asks to tutor you seems to gain a sick satisfaction from seeing you squirm; he hates you...or so think.
pairing: michael gavey x reader
warnings: mature, 18+ (minors, do not enter!!!) no use of Y/N, afab reader, profanity, smut, piv smut, fingering, oral sex (m receiving), dom/sub, brief daddy kink (literally one mention), dirty talk, dumbification, humiliation (only a bit), size kink if you squint, mild angst but happy ending, choking i guess (barely), public sex (they're alone but like it's still public lmao), brief discussions of math -- please let me know if i missed anything!
word count: 10.5k (dear lord)
a/n: baby's first fic omg! if you enjoy this one and want to see more from me, please feel free to send in requests! (GoT, HoTD, Stranger Things, Marvel, etc!)
PRAISE | Taunt Part 2
MAKING AMENDS | Bonus
likes, comments, & reblogs are very appreciated but never required!
🌟add yourself to my taglist to be notified when i post new fics!🌟
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“Right, so,” Professor Davies began, pulling a thick textbook off the shelf next to his desk, “Since we’ve only just returned from Easter holiday, I thought I’d go easy on you today.” 
A few quiet groans could be heard around the room, a couple students turning to look at one another with grimaces; in the few weeks you’ve been in Professor Davies’s class, he’s never once gone easy on you. With a small sigh, you shuffle through your spiral notebook until you come to a blank page. 
“D’you think you’ll go to the party this weekend?” Louise whispers, leaning over closer to you as she twirls a pen around in her fingers, “I heard this one is supposed to be fucking insane.”
“Like any of Felix’s parties aren’t insane?” You whisper back, smirking as you doodle a small flower on the corner of a page of paper, “Of course I’ll be there,” you murmur, watching as Professor Davies writes an intricate formula on the chalkboard, “I could really use a break, anyway…I’ve been so stressed recently.”
“Christ…” A boy, in the row of desks in front of you scoffs, just barely shaking his head as he copies down the formula, his handwriting sharp and choppy. You feel blood rush to your cheeks as you narrow your eyes, staring intently at his sandy hair. You didn’t really know him, this being your only class with him, but you’d seen him around campus, regularly passing by him in the halls. Oxford may be a large university, but when you’re on campus everyday, you begin recognizing familiar faces. 
He didn’t run in the same crowds as you at all, and you got the distinct impression that he looked down on you and the rest of your friends, but you knew his name – Michael and that he was incredibly smart, his hand promptly shooting into the air anytime Professor Davies asked a question. In the few weeks you’d been in the same statistics class, you had yet to see him get a question wrong, watching as he grinned, cocky, everytime he was praised for correctly solving even the most intricate of formulas. 
You, on the other hand, couldn’t be more the opposite, always shying away and praying not to hear Professor Davies call your name in his deep, baritone voice every time his eyes scanned the crowd, looking for a volunteer, or victim, more like. While Michael clearly enjoyed the class, practically glowing with an arrogant confidence as soon as he walked into the wood paneled lecture hall, you were simply here to check it off as a requirement of your major, hoping to survive the class with a C and nothing more. 
It was annoying, you wouldn’t deny that, the way that smug smirk seemed to be permanently etched onto his face, how that stupid taunting glimmer was an ever-present fixture of his blue eyes — blue eyes which, seemingly, always managed to find their way to you, one way or another. 
His attention was intimidating at first, his cold stare leaving you unsure of what exactly his intention was. Was he trying to challenge you? Trying to determine if he knew you from somewhere else? A small part of you, a naive part, hoped that his staring was meant to be affectionate; he was cute, you’d admit it! Always showing up to class in cozy knit sweaters, his wavy hair still ruffled and untidy as if he’d just gotten out of bed, gold rimmed glasses perched atop a strong nose.
You quickly tear your gaze away from the back of Michael’s head, biting your bottom lip as you begin copying down the problem on the chalkboard, pausing briefly when you see, from the corner of your eye, his head turn as he glances at you over his shoulder. You felt your cheeks flush despite yourself, that small, sanguine voice in the back of your head cheering. 
“Now, then,” Professor Davies booms, dropping the textbook down on his desk with a cacophonous thud before sweeping his eyes across the classroom, “A bit of review before we really dive in…” He continues, pacing around the front of the room as he explains the various parts and pieces of the equation on the board. 
“What do you think you’ll wear?” Louise asks, leaning over once more to whisper in your ear, you can smell her signature floral perfume on her hair, “I was thinking I’d do that new blue-ish dress I got, you know, the strappy one?”
“Might still be too cold for strappy,” you whisper back, half listening to the professor drone on as you continue doodling on your paper, pausing every few minutes to jot down a few haphazard notes, “I was just thinking I’d do a jumper, probably a skirt and tights–”
Suddenly, you hear Professor Davies call your name, your cheeks practically stinging as blood rushes to your face. Sitting up straighter, you finally find the courage to meet his stern gaze, “Since you seem all too eager to share your thoughts,” He continues slowly stalking towards you across wooden floorboards that softly creak beneath his feet, “Would you care to enlighten us with the solution to the quadratic equation on the board?” He comes to a stop, hands clasped behind his back as he patiently waits for you to answer, a small, knowing smile poised on his lips. 
“I– uhm, well,” you stutter, glancing back and forth between your barely there notes and the chalkboard, throat growing tighter as you feel everyone's eyes on you, “Don’t you need to solve for G first?”
“And how would you go about doing that?”
“Well, you would…” You trail off, desperately trying to remember the lessons you’d had before Easter holiday, absentmindedly picking at your cuticle as you pray to be anywhere but here or for a hole to open in the floor and swallow you whole, “I…I don’t recall, professor. I’m sorry.” You finally say, not being able to meet his gaze as you stare intently at your lap, desperately willing yourself not to cry, even as you feel your eyes stinging. 
“Perhaps, in the future, it would be of benefit to socialize with your friends outside of my classroom.” Professor Davies admonishes, giving a sharp glare to Louise as well, who manages an apologetic smile. “Yes, Professor.” You whisper, keeping your eyes downturned. 
Finally, you hear the floorboards softly creaking once more as Professor Davies makes his way back up to the podium at the front of the room and once again resumes his lecture. You can’t help but pause for a second when you hear a small snicker from the tall boy in front of you, sensing as he peers at you over his shoulder once again. 
“Would anyone else like to take a crack at the problem on the board?” Professor Davies asks, leaning against the old, worn podium at the front of the room. Like clockwork, Michael’s hand shoots into the air. Somehow, that makes you blush even harder.
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Eventually, Professor Davies finishes his lecture and retrieves his dark leather briefcase from under the desk, pulling a thick stack of papers out and sitting them on the podium, leaning over it with a sigh, “I have your tests graded. Most of you did very well, you should be pleased with yourselves. Some of you, however,” He says pointedly, “Could benefit greatly from a closer study of the material.”
Slowly, he walks around the room passing back tests, throwing out a comment here and there as he did so. You already know you hadn't done well on that particular test and dread getting it back and confirming your suspicions, so you keep yourself busy, choosing to meticulously pack up your things instead. 
“Mr. Gavey,” he said a few feet away from you, papers rustling as he slid the test across the wooden surface of the long bench desks, “Once more, an outstanding job! Top of the class, keep it up.” 
“Thank you, Professor,” you glance up, watching as he takes the paper with a humble nod, that same, oh-so pleased smile gracing his angular face. He must sense you looking at him and quickly shifts his gaze in your direction, eyes glimmering with self-satisfaction behind his gold-rimmed glasses as his smile quickly turns into a smirk. Finally, you tear your gaze away from his with a small, bewildered huff. Why did he seem to get so much satisfaction from besting you, of all people? It’s not like you were exactly an academic threat. 
“Ms. Bickerstaff,” Professor Davies says, finally appearing next to the table you and Louise sat at, “Not bad, a bit more effort next time and you’re sure to be on track,” he remarks, sliding her paper across the desk. Louise thanks him with a small smile as she flips through her test, eyes scanning over his marks. 
Finally, Professor Davies stands before you once again, your paper the very last in his hands. You hear him mutter your last name before he slides the paper across the desk to you, and you can’t help but deflate as you see your grade; you knew it would be bad, but that? How on Earth were you going to recover your average? What if you had to retake the whole course? What if you failed out of Oxford entirely? Your parents had sacrificed so much to help you get here, spending years and untold amounts of money on private tutors and extracurricular materials, all to help you have an impressive application! Not to mention the money just for the course fees! Unlike most of your friends, you didn’t come from piles and piles of money and status – your family was alright, sure, but you were definitely several tax brackets below them. 
As your thoughts spiraled, you felt Louise elbow you in the side at the same time you heard Professor Davies address you again. Shaking your head to clear your scattered thoughts, you clear your throat and finally turn to look up at him, “Sorry, yes, Professor?” 
“As I was saying,” Professor Davies continues, tapping the papers in front of you, “I would like to discuss your performance with you today, after class. Please meet me at the front of the room before you go.”
“Yes, sir.” you mumble dejectedly, nodding as you quickly flip the test over, embarrassed at the thought of anyone else seeing your grade. 
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“I’ll see you later, babes,” Louise says a few minutes later as everyone is clearing out of the room, “Good luck!” She whispers, giving you a reassuring pat on the shoulder before making her way to the door.
“Thanks!” you smile weakly, swallowing the lump in your throat before picking up your things and heading to the front of the room. The afternoon sun is already getting lower in the sky, beams of light shining into the room, bathing rectangular swaths of the floor in bright, golden light and highlighting motes of dust as they scatter in the air. Only a few students are left in the classroom, some of them finishing up notes while others type out quick texts. As you walk by his desk, you notice Michael scribbling down notes in his planner. 
You shuffle your feet nervously as you stand in front of the sizable oak desk that your professor sits at, watching as he adds a sticky note to the top of another stack of papers, “You wanted to see me, Professor?”
“Ah, yes!” He says, looking up at you over his glasses. He quickly caps his pen and stands, walking around the desk to stand in front of you, “I know this class has been quite the challenge,” he begins, leaning against the desk, “But, I think I’ve found a solution for you.” 
“You have?” You ask, tilting your head in confusion.
“I think you could benefit greatly from a tutor, perhaps a peer who could explain the material to you in a different way,” he continues, “And I have just the student in mind.” Instantly, you feel a pit beginning to form in your stomach, biting your bottom lip as you watch Professor Davies motion for someone behind you to come up to the desk, “Mr. Gavey, if you could join us up here, please.”
You freeze when you feel him saunter up beside you, eyeing him out of the corner of your eye. He was so much taller than you, your head barely grazing his shoulder, as he came to a stop next to you, standing casually with his backpack slung over one shoulder. 
Professor Davies once again turns his attention to you, motioning to Michael as he speaks, “Mr. Gavey here is one of my most capable students,” you can’t help but notice him stand up straighter at the comment, growing somehow even taller, “I’ve taken the liberty of asking him if he would be so kind as to assist you with some of the course work and he agreed.” You freeze a little at that, stunned that he would be so quick to help you when he seems to relish any opportunity to make you squirm. “I’ve given it some thought,” the professor continues, fixing you with a stern gaze, “And I’m willing to let you make corrections to your test and resubmit it for half credit.”
“Oh, thank you so much, prof–”
“However,” he adds, crossing his arms over his chest, “This will be the only time I do so. From now on, I suggest you see Mr. Gavey here on a regular basis; the material is only going to get more challenging as we begin this next unit.”
“Of course, professor. Thank you again.” You respond quietly, shifting uneasily as you stand between the two men. 
“Right, well, now that’s sorted,” Professor Davies says, clapping his hands together once as he turns and makes his way back over to the desk chair, sitting down with a tired sigh, “I trust the two of you can come to an agreement upon when and where to meet. I’ll see you again Monday, have a pleasant weekend.” He says, waving his hand dismissively as he goes back to organizing his papers. 
The two of you murmur your goodbyes before making your way into the hall, the hairs on the back of your neck standing up as he follows you out of the classroom. Eventually, you come across a small alcove in the hallway; finally turning to face him, you let your eyes sweep up his body, finally coming to meet his blue eyes, slightly hidden behind the glare of the hallway lights on his glasses. 
“So,” you clear your throat and shift on your feet awkwardly, “Uh, what time works for you? I really can’t do Saturdays–” you begin, only to be cut off.
“Shame,” Michael sighs dismissively, a smirk pulling at one corner of his mouth, “Saturday is the only day that works for me.” 
The tone of his voice and the mirthful glint in his eyes makes you very much doubt that, your gaze narrowing, “Okay, well Saturday’s are the only day I have off,” you huff, only growing more annoyed as the stupid smirk on his face grows with satisfaction, no doubt pleased that he’s being a nuisance, “Besides, I super can’t tomorrow, anyway. I already promised my friends I’d come with them to this party tha–”
“Oh, I know about your little party,” Michael scoffs, “Trust me, love, the whole damn class heard about that stupid fucking party with the way you lot were running your mouths earlier,” he chuckles coldly, continuing in an exaggerated high-pitched voice, one hand coming up to mime twirling a lock of hair, “Oooooh, it’s so cold, can’t wear the fuckin’ strappy dress, gotta wear me jumper and little slutty skirt, la-dee-dah.” He finishes with a final huff of laughter. 
“What is your deal with me?!” You finally snap, glaring at him, even as you feel your face redden, “You’ve been a dick all semester and I haven’t done anything to you! I’ve never even talked to you!” Glancing around the empty hallway, you cross your arms over your chest, praying no one’s in earshot to hear your hissed tirade.
“I might not know you but I know plenty about your little friends,” he sneers, shaking his head like a disappointed father; the sight makes your blood boil.
“What does that even mean?” You demand, eyebrows knitting together in confusion. What did your friends have to do with any of this? None of them ever spoke about Michael, none of them even knew him as far as you were aware. 
His face softens, if only for a moment, as he registers the genuine confusion on your face, smirk faltering as his eyes narrow. He leans in closer to you as he begins speaking again and you can’t help but get a brief smell of the cologne he wears, something warm and woodsy that makes you think of a bookshop and the smell of the forest after it rains, “Come on,” he starts, blue eyes flitting between both of yours as he looks at you intently, “Felix Catton? You and your little friend, the one from class, you go around with him, yeah?”
You nod, giving him another puzzled look, confused as to what the hell Felix has to do with any of his disdain, “Yeah,” you say slowly, drawing out the word, “But, what does he have to do with anything?”
Michael huffs once more, almost laughing to himself as he shakes his head, burying his hands in the pockets of his jeans, “See, we went to school together, him and I – some of primary, all of secondary,” he shrugs, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth as he traps you in his gaze once again, “And I just don’t fucking like the guy. Can’t stand him, never could’ve.” 
You’re silent for a second, and now it’s your turn to flick your eyes back and forth, searching each of his for some sort of coherent answer and yet you come up empty. “But, what does that have to do with me?” You ask slowly, making sure to carefully enunciate each word.
“Don’t trust the people around him either,” he mutters, gazing down at his shoe, “Weirdos, the whole lot. There’s something…off about the guy. Can’t put my finger on it, but there’s something dark there, all around him. Like he’s putting on one big show. All his little gremlins do too, they all act the same.”
The two of you are silent for a moment, neither knowing quite what to say next. You chance a glance up at him, nearly gasping when you find him already gazing at you – an unreadable expression on his face. Yet a light blush still blooms on your cheeks as you quickly look away once again, your heart thudding so loudly you’re wondering if he can hear it – hell, you’re wondering why you’re reacting this way at all, why you’re so shy and skittish around him. 
“M’not like that,” you very nearly whisper, finally seeming to regain your voice. Only to lose it once again when he takes a half step toward you, suddenly crowding you further into the small alcove.
He makes a small noise, damn near cooing at you, tilting his head to the side when he notices you flinch as he raises an arm, gently raising your chin with one hand, angling your head up to meet his gaze, that signature smirk once again taking hold on his face as he looks at you curiously, “You’re not like that, are you?” He asks, his voice low and raspy. 
You quickly shake your head, blinking up at him, unsure of what exactly he wants from you. You feel your cheeks stinging for the umpteenth time today with how hard you’re blushing, a strange feeling taking root in your stomach the longer you stare at him, that small voice in your head positively cheering. 
But, as quickly as whatever spell he seems to have on you takes hold, it’s broken as he suddenly lets go of your chin and steps back, casually pursing his lips and nodding to himself, coming to some unknown decision in his head, “Meet me in Bodleian, tomorrow at five. There’s hardly anyone up on the third floor on the weekends, so we'll be able to focus.” He says simply, turning on his heel to leave without even giving you a second to answer.
“But I’m bus–”
“D’you want a good grade or do you want to go get drunk with your creepy gremlin friends?” He asks, peering over his shoulder as he saunters down the hallway, raising an eyebrow at you over the shiny gold rim of his glasses, “S’your call, love.” He finishes with a shrug, disappearing as he turns a corner and leaves you standing there alone, frowning and dumbstruck. 
“Bodleian at five it is,” you mutter to yourself, sighing as you turn and walk the opposite way, desperately trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach and the fog in your brain. 
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Your shoes tap against the stone pavement as you walk up to the old library, backpack slung over one shoulder; reaching into a pocket of your backpack, you blindly grab for your phone as you pull open one of the heavy, old wooden doors and step into the atrium. Out of all of Oxford’s libraries, you had to admit that Bodleian was one of your favorites; it had such a soothing atmosphere – from the way the evening light trickled in through the old glass windows, to the intricate wooden decor, and the way the entire place smelled of the old, well-loved books that lined the countless rows of shelves. 
Stepping to the side of the entryway, you check the time, your hand shaking a bit as you unlock your phone – 4:53pm, a little early, still. Sighing, you crane your head, nervously looking for Michael. Not seeing him, you decide to bide your time examining one of the tall bookshelves near the entrance, eyes skimming over their titles as you fiddle with the strings of the hoodie you’d decided to wear. Smiling, you lean up on your tiptoes to grab a copy of The Two Towers, happy to see a familiar book. Just as your fingers graze over the embossed gold lettering on the spine of the book, a large pair of hands grab you by the shoulders.
“Boo!” Someone whispers, close enough that you feel the warmth of their breath on the side of your neck. 
You spin around with a small shriek, jerking your head to the side when a hand is suddenly clasped over your mouth.
“Shh! Hey, relax!” Finally managing to focus on the face in front of you, your breathing slows as your gaze meets a pair of round blue eyes. Michael’s face is only inches from yours, concern evident, even behind the mask of a smirk he wears. “It’s only me.” He says softly, smirk softening into a genuine smile that sends a frantic tingle down your spine, which you desperately try to ignore as you nod against his hand, gasping in a small breath as it lowers once again to rest on your shoulder. 
“Hi.” Blinking up at him, you breathe the word more so than say it as you settle back on your feet, cheeks flushing as you realize he has his other arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you forward ever so slightly, like he wanted to make sure your head didn’t hit the sharp edge of one of the shelves; the voice in your head purrs as the butterflies in your stomach summersalt. 
“Hi.” He answers and you feel the hand on your shoulder twitch, the ghost of a comforting squeeze or rub causing the hair on the back of your neck to stand on end as some strange, warm weight settles in the pit of your stomach. 
Suddenly, whatever spell the two of you seemed to be under broke and you quickly clambered away from one another. Michael cleared his throat, running a hand through his wheat colored hair as you tugged at the sleeves of your hoodie, trying to look anywhere but in his direction. “Should we–” He starts suddenly, nodding his head to a staircase at the other end of the room, “It’ll be quieter up there.”
“Sure!” You chirp, giving him a curt nod, “Lead the way, you seem to know the place better than I do.”
“Well,” he chuckles, keeping his voice low as he moves past you, “S’what happens when you don’t spend all your damn time at weirdo parties.” 
You roll your eyes behind him, huffing as you start following him up the staircase, one of your hands gliding across the smooth, polished wood of the bannister. 
“Sorry.” He says suddenly as you reach the third floor of the library, running a hand through his hair once again as he stands at the top of the staircase. 
“What?” You ask, coming to a stop on the last step and looking up at him, tilting your head to the side as you lean against the handrail. 
“For earlier,” he explains, gesturing for you to follow him as he starts making his way to the back corner of the large, open space, the one furthest from the stairs, “Scaring you, I mean. Didn’t mean to.”
You’re quiet for a moment, following him as the two of you walk past aisle after aisle of towering bookshelves. The area is definitely quieter than the main floor, nearly vacant aside from one or two lone students sitting at the long wooden study tables. It’s calm up here, evening light filtering in through large windows on either end of the long room, casting large shadows on the floor and vaulted ceilings.
Eventually, the two of you come to a stop at a table, the very last in its row, tucked away in a corner. “It’s alright,” you shrug, trying to keep your voice soft in the quiet space as you sit your backpack on the edge of the table, “I don’t know why I’m so jumpy today, maybe the tea from earlier.” You lie, hopefully smoothly, and quickly grab a pen and notebook as well, before sitting down.
Michael huffs to himself as he sits his things out on the table as well, like he’s laughing at a joke you can’t hear, “Maybe it’s all that tension.”
“Wh– tension?” You question, cringing at the urgency in your voice as you pray that he doesn’t pick up on it, shifting in your seat as he pulls out the chair next to you and plops down, completely relaxed as if he owns the place. 
“The stress? That you were meant to be working out at Catton’s?” He gives you an odd look, resting his head against his hand as he leans his elbow on the table, “Couldn’t help but overhear your little conversation yesterday.”
“Oh…” You breathe, a pink haze settling over your cheeks once more as you fidget with your pen, acutely aware of how easily he seems to be able to make you blush. 
The smirk on his face widens as he narrows his eyes, studying you in a way that makes your heart squeeze, your thighs clenching together as that heady weight from earlier makes itself known again in your stomach, “You can’t keep one thought in that head, can you, love?”
You blink, unsure of what to say, as two halves of your brain argue with one another. Why is he so mean? You wonder to yourself, eyes searching his, as you frown, And…God, why do I like it?
“Why don’t you like me?” You ask, finally breaking the silence with your small voice. 
He scoffs again, shaking his head as if the answer should be obvious to you, “You don’t take it seriously. You come to class and whisper and gossip with your damn friend or doodle in your little notebook, but you don’t fucking listen.” He sits back up, frowning, “I work hard every fucking day in there, for fuck’s sake, I only agreed to help you because I want to be Davies’s teaching assistant next year! Yet you and Catton and everyone like you can just pay their way in here, collecting a little diploma from Oxford just so their parents can brag about it with their stupid fucking rich friends.” He finally finishes, turning his head to stare out the window. 
“Told you, I’m not like that,” you whisper after a moment, voice wavering from the tightness in the back of your throat, “I’m here on scholarship, same as you.” 
His eyes flit back to you, his frown deepening, “How did you know ab–”
“Like I’m not going to ask around about the guy tutoring me?”
“Fair enough.” He concedes after a minute. 
Silence settles over the two of you again, like a stalemate, waiting to see who would crack first. Finally, you turn to him with a sigh, nodding to your test paper on the desk, “Can we just get this done? I don’t want to be here any more than you do.”
“Ah, of course,” he nods as he picks up your test, looking over the first incorrect problem, “Catton’s big important party. And you’re stuck here with a loser like me; must really be doing your head in, huh?” 
You want so badly to correct him, to tell him that no, actually, for once, you were kind of excited to not be at one of Felix’s parties. You wanted to tell him that you’d hoped things would be different, maybe if it was just the two of you he would drop the arrogant asshole bit, that you stupidly hoped it was just an act. 
Instead, you bite your lip, determined not to lash out and give him another reason to dislike you, “I don’t think you’re a loser, Michael,” you say, tiredly meeting his gaze, “Can we just focus on this now, please?” 
He’s quiet for a moment, frozen like you’d said something groundbreaking. Finally, he nods his head, almost imperceptibly like he’d come to a decision you weren’t privy to, “Sure,” he says gruffly, grabbing your test and reading over the first incorrect problem, “S’not like I’m the one failing.” He finishes, his voice tight and determined, like he knew it was something he’d regret saying even as the words left his mouth. 
See? You think silently, pointed words aimed at that stupid voice in your head, Told you so.
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It’s barely an hour later and you already feel cross-eyed, groaning as Michael flips your test over to the next page and you see you’re only just now halfway done correcting the ones you’d gotten wrong. You hate to admit it to yourself, but his tutoring was helping — problems that you’d hardly been able to finish the first time seem far less daunting as he explains them to you. Even he seems less daunting as the hour goes on; shockingly, he doesn’t make anymore snide comments and you can tell that he genuinely enjoys talking about the subject, patiently helping you through each problem. 
“Can we take a break?” You grumble, laying your head down on top of your textbook. 
“What?” He scoffs, rolling his eyes as he checks his watch, “It’s hardly been an hour and you’re ready to give up?” 
“‘M not giving up,” you mumble, “I just think we could use a little break…” You say hopefully, looking at him with a small smile. When he doesn’t break, holding your gaze with a frown, you sigh, “Just, like, ten minutes, please?” 
You want to groan again when you see that formidable smirk make its home on his lips again, “Say please again.” He commands, his voice low. 
“Huh?” You balk, nearly dropping your phone as you retrieve it from your pocket. 
“Say please again,” he says slowly, his smirk only growing wider as he watches your cheeks redden, “Beg.” 
“W-why?” You question, face burning as you try your damndest to look unbothered by his request. 
He shrugs dismissively, “Makes you squirm,” he answers finally, leaning back in his chair, “I like that.”
“Why?” Your voice is so small you doubt he’d even know you spoke if his eyes weren’t fixed on you. 
He hums, a satisfied noise, like you’ve finally managed to meander into a trap he’d set ages ago, “S’fucking cute,” he huffs out a laugh when he sees your eyes widen, “Makes you blush and act all dumb.” 
You know you should be offended, but you can’t find it within yourself to care, “You think I’m cute?” 
He chuckles, sighing, “That’s what you choose to focus on?” 
“Do you?” 
“Fine, yes.” 
“Please, Michael,” you say suddenly, the words feeling practically punched from your throat, “Please, please can we have a break? Please, only ten minutes?” You beg, breathing hard as you quickly scan the room, shoulders relaxing when you don’t see anyone else sitting at the study tables. 
You see the way his eyes widen behind his glasses, like he can’t believe you actually did it, before they narrow once more, overtaken by a satisfied gleam, “Ten minutes.” He says simply, leaning back in his chair yet again, letting his head flop back, relaxed, and closes his eyes. 
You don’t move for a second, letting your eyes study the side of his face, looking over his sharp jawline and the curve of his nose. After a moment, you look away, deciding to pull out your phone. 
A few minutes go by as you answer a few texts from Louise, telling her that you miss her too and how you wish you were at the party — a lie, though you can’t find it within yourself to care. You busy yourself for a while longer, watching a few people's Instagram stories, the volume on your phone muted as you watch your friends dance under colorful strobe lights, blowing smoke at the camera and clinking drinks together. 
“I meant what I said.” You say finally, laying your phone on the table and picking at one of your cuticles. 
“Hm?” Michael questions, not bothering to open his eyes. 
“I don’t think you’re a loser,” you answer, fidgeting, “I never have. I think you’re…intriguing.”
“Intriguing?” He asks, finally sitting up and looking at you with a questioning stare, “How so?” 
You swallow, tucking your hair behind your ear with a shrug, “You’re smart…you know you’re smart,” you start, voice small and shaky, “I like that.”
“You like that or you like me?” He’s looking at you like a cat playing with a helpless mouse, looking at you like he knows he’s already won a game you don’t even know the two of you are playing. 
“You.” It comes out as a breath. 
He doesn’t answer and eventually you look away from him, choosing to stare out the window at the streetlights outside, the sky dark. 
Finally, the silence becomes overbearing and you break first again, “Thank you,” you smile at him, keeping your voice low even though you know the rest of the floor is vacant, even though the noise of the floors below has drastically faded over the last hour, “For helping me, I mean. You probably have a dozen things you’d rather do on a Saturday.” 
He stays quiet for a few seconds, “I didn’t really have anything better to do,” he smirks, “No parties.” 
“None?” 
“Never,” he shakes his head, shrugging, “Don’t get invited.” 
“Oh,” you answer simply, “Well, still, either way, thank you.” You smile again, but it falters when he leans forward suddenly, crowding into your space with a sly grin, so close that you can feel his breath on your neck. 
“I know a way you could repay me, love,” he whispers lowly into your ear, your hair standing on end, “Only if you want to, of course.” He adds, his long fingers toying with a strand of your hair. 
Your eyes grow comically wide as you process what he just said, “H-how do you want me to repay you?” You whisper, your eyes finally meeting his. 
He laughs softly, letting go of the strand of your hair to rest his hand lightly against the side of your face, his thumb skimming over your cheek as he watches a rosy hue settle across it, “I can think,” he starts, thumb moving lower to skate across your bottom lip, slightly tugging the skin with it, “Of one very fucking good way to put this mouth to use, love.” 
You part your lips slightly, letting the tip of his thumb into your mouth, just barely holding it between your teeth as you lightly run your tongue over it, heart skipping a beat at the way his lips just barely part in shock as you do. The voice in your head purrs again, roaring back to life, and you nod, smiling around his finger. 
“Yeah?” He questions, smirking as he watches your lips twitch around his thumb, “”Y’wanna?”
“Yes.” You reply around his thumb, your hands coming up to hold onto his forearm, the fabric of his rust colored sweater soft under your hands. 
“Beg.” He commands again, eyes twinkling. 
You take in a breath, eyes slipping shut as your thighs clench around nothing – missing the way Michael glances down at the movement, a knowing grin forming on his face, “Please, Michael.” You practically whine. 
“Ooh,” he coos, finally moving his thumb from your mouth, only to trail his hand down your neck, lightly resting it against your throat, “I think you can do better than that, pretty. Open your eyes and damn beg.” 
You follow his orders, a small whimper skirting past your lips at the new pet name as you open your eyes, “Please, Michael, please let me repay you, let me thank you, please.” The words tumble out, your eyes wide and pleading. 
“How’re you planning on doing that, empty headed little thing?” He taunts, the hand around your throat just barely tightening but it’s enough to make you let out a small, desperate whine. He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth, moving close enough to you that the front of his chest is plastered to your side, his heart beating against your shoulder, “Ask for what you want, beg properly.” His breath fans across the side of your face again, the feeling of his lips brushing over the side of your jaw making you jump. 
“Please, God, Michael,” you whine, squeezing your legs together so hard you’re surprised they haven’t fused together, “P-please let me suck your cock — to thank you, thank you for helping me.” You add quickly, breath shaky as you turn your head to look at him imploringly. 
He chuckles, but he looks pleased as he leans back momentarily, craning his neck to make sure there isn’t anyone around, “Alright, alright, love,” he soothes, coming back to face you, nodding his head to the empty space in front of his hair, below the table, “Not God, but I’ll give you what you want.” He teases.
Your breath catches in your throat as you look down at the floor beneath the desk, then back up at him before nodding, “Yes, sir.” You push yourself off your chair, sliding down beneath the desk. 
“Goddammit,” you hear him groan above you, running his palms over his thighs as he parts them, making room for you, “Keep that up, love, might even give you extra credit.” 
You rest your palms against the tops of his thighs as you move between his legs, getting comfortable on your knees, the old wooden floor cool against your skin, even through your black leggings. Finally, your eyes settle on the sizable bulge, covered by his dark jeans, and you can’t help the small whine that leaves your lips. Slowly, you move your hands up to the button of his pants, quickly popping it open and dragging the zipper down, smiling when Michael sighs above you as he pulls his sweater up out of the way, exposing the pale skin of his stomach. You let your eyes roam over him, warmth settling between your legs as you spot the dusting of light hair that starts beneath his belly button and leads downwards, disappearing under his plaid boxers.
You move closer to him, crowding in between his long legs, as you hook your fingers over the tops of his boxers, before finally looking up at him, “Can I…?” You ask, nodding to where his cock is straining against the fabric. 
“Don’t be shy now, princess,” he groans, running a hand through your hair as he stares down at you, “Get on with it.”
You keep your eyes on his as you pull his boxers down, just enough to free his cock, watching the way his chest heaves as he lets out another relieved sigh. Finally, you tear your gaze away from his as you look at his cock, gasping in a breath as you do. As far as dicks go, Michaels is impressive, beautiful even – long and thick with veins running up the underside, leading up to a flushed, leaking tip. 
You take him in your hand tentatively, squeezing him lightly around the base, your confidence growing when he grunts, breathing heavier. Finally, you lightly lick the tip, eyes sliding closed at the pleasant, salty taste of his pre-cum. You take the tip of him in your mouth, humming around him when his fingers tighten in your hair, lightly pushing on the back of your head, silently urging you to take more of him. 
“Fuck, that’s it,” he roughly groans, managing to keep his voice low, “Knew that pretty fucking mouth was good for something.” He moves his hips, impatiently thrusting his cock an inch deeper into your mouth, breathily cursing under his breath. 
You start bobbing your head up and down over his length, taking more and more of him into your mouth, more of his pre-cum leaking onto your tongue as you feel his dick throb and twitch in your hand. After a moment, you take a deep breath through your nose and remove your hand, resting it on his thigh, as you take him all the way to the base, your nose nestled in the short patch of hair there as you breathe in his heady scent, your eyes glazing over as you savor the feeling of him at the back of your throat. 
“Jesus!” He grunts, louder than he meant to, keeping your head in place as he thrusts his hips up again, keeping you in place at the base of his cock, “Fuck, that’s it,” he praised lowly, your center throbbing, no doubt leaking onto the fabric of your leggings, “Look at me, wanna see your eyes while I fuck your throat.”
You whine, desperately blinking back tears as you look up at him, trying to keep your breathing even. You hold his gaze as you stick your tongue out, licking lower, down toward his balls, relishing the way his eyes roll back as you do, stomach muscles twitching as he continues thrusting his hips up into your mouth, soaking his boxers and jeans with your spit. 
“Oh, fuck, that’s it,” he groans, looking down at you, his eyelids heavy, “God, yeah, cry on my cock love. Fuck, you look so pretty crying on my cock.” He mumbles, talking to himself more so than you. 
His words send a shiver down your spine, adding to the heat in your center, and you whimper when he finally moves his hand from the back of your head, allowing you to come up for air. You do, with a gasp, thin strings of spit connecting your reddened lips with the flushed head of his cock. You keep your eyes on his as you wrap your lips around him once more, running your tongue along the thick vein on the underside before sucking at the swollen tip, relishing the way it makes him clench his jaw and gasp through his teeth as you stroke the rest of him with your hand. 
Above you, he smirks again, gently running his hand through your hair but making no move to press your head down again. He cocks his head to the side, studying you, grinning at the far-off, foggy look in your eyes, “Not a thought in that pretty head, is there?” He asks, bringing his hand down and gently patting your cheek; the ghost of a slap making your thighs clench, making your head dizzy with need. 
You nod around him, moving your head up and down along his length. You feel yourself throbbing with need, pulsing with heat; almost automatically, your hand starts to wander, a small sigh escaping you as your hand presses against your center through your leggings. You feel a warmth settle across your cheeks again as you feel your own wetness, leaking through the fabric just as you’d suspected. You whimper as you press down again, your eyes falling shut as you let your hips grind against your fingers, the wet fabric creating a delicious friction against your clit. 
Which you get to feel for all of five seconds before Michael is suddenly yanking your head from his length, causing you to yelp as he tugs your hair. “Did I say you could touch your cunt?” 
“N-no,” you whine pathetically, eyes watering from the harsh hold he has on your hair, “I’m sorry, I wasn’t think—“ You try to explain, only for him to cut you off with another harsh tug, making you mewl. 
“That’s a pattern with you, isn’t it?” He asks, looking at you with a condescending smirk, studying you again, “You were being such a good girl earlier, what happened? Hm?” He questions, pushing his chair back enough to pull you out from under the table. 
You get to your feet, suddenly feeling shy in front of him once again despite having his cock in your mouth mere moments ago. “I…got distracted.” You answer finally. 
“I got distracted….who?” He asks, looking up at you expectantly over the rims of his glasses. 
“I got distracted, sir,” you quickly correct yourself, eyes frantically scanning the still vacant floor of the library, “I’m sorry.”
“That’s much better, love,” he drawls, placing his hands on your hips, “Now, what could’ve been so fucking distracting, huh?” He starts moving his hands, slowly, toward your center, still looking up at you, his eyes questioning. You nod your head, just barely but enough for him to understand, and any hesitancy from him quickly disappeared. “Could it be this, I wonder?” He questions sardonically, suddenly cupping your heat in his large hand, the warmth of it nearly making your knees buckle, even through the thin fabric of your leggings. He hums, the sound low in his chest, when he feels how much you’ve soaked the fabric, 
“Oh,” you whimper, grabbing at his shoulders to keep yourself balanced as his fingers continue to tease you, rubbing circles into your clit, “Oh my God, fuck.”
“Christ,” he breathes, staring up at you with dark eyes, “So fucking wet, love, holy hell. Did you get this way just from sucking my cock?”
“Yeah,” you whine, nodding your head desperately as you try to swallow all the small noises you want to make in your throat, your hips rutting against his hand, “Please, sir!”
“Oh, so now that dumb brain has no trouble remembering damn instructions, huh?” He taunts, a wicked grin on his face as his fingers rub your clit in smaller, harsher circles, making you see stars, “Need your wet little cunt played with to be able to do as you're told?”
You nod your head frantically, tears nearly spilling from your eyes at the zaps of pleasure radiating from you, your walls clenching around nothing. Just as you feel yourself about to tip over the edge, he stops, jerking his hand away from you with a knowing chuckle, “W-what?” You question, eyes blinking open, “I was so close!” You whine, nearly stamping your foot on the floor like a petulant child. 
“Told you,” Michael shrugs, pulling you to sit in his lap, your back against his chest as he wraps his arms around you. His breath tickles the side of your neck and face when he speaks again, “You’re so fun to tease, love, can’t help myself.”
You wiggle in his grasp, making him groan as your ass grinds against his hard length, desperately trying to get your hands free to touch your pussy again, nearly out of your mind with need. “P-please, sir, please touch me!” You finally gasp out, knowing he won’t give in until you do.
“Now there’s a good girl,” he says, voice pleased and cocky as he plants kisses along the side of your neck, “Since you asked so nicely…” He says, letting go of one of your arms, letting you grasp the arm still wrapped around you with your hands, as his free hand skirts down your stomach to the top of your leggings, pausing long enough for you to nod again, before he finally touches you. 
You whimper, jerking in his lap at the feel of his warm fingers directly on your heat for the first time, spreading your wet folds with a satisfied hum. His long fingers move down to your entrance, gathering some of the wetness there, “You’re so fucking wet,” he marvels, dragging his fingers up to your aching clit, “Fucking dripping on my fingers.” He murmurs in your ear, nipping at the side of your neck and sending tingles down your spine as he starts rubbing tight, wet circles against your bud. 
You tilt your head back, resting it against his shoulder as your chest heaves. A moan leaves your mouth, louder than it should be, and Michaels free hand shoots up, wrapping around your mouth. “Gotta be quiet, love,” he whispers, not slowing down the movement of his fingers in the slightest, “Wouldn’t want someone to interrupt, hm? Make me stop again?” 
You squeeze your eyes shut, whining desperately against his hand as he moves his fingers against you, the coil in your belly winding tighter and tighter. Your whole body lurches atop his, making him suck a breath in through his teeth as you move against his cock, still hard and hot as it presses against your lower back, when he moves his hand lower, plunging two fingers into your tight heat with no warning. “Fuck!” You yelp, muffled against his hand; tears leak from the corners of your eyes as he moves his fingers, scissoring them into you relentlessly as his thumb circles your clit. 
“S’fucking tight,” he mumbles lowly, voice vibrating his chest against your back, “God, you’re tight.” He grunts between clenched teeth, repeatedly crooking his fingers inside you as he fucks his fingers in and out of your heat, letting out small, barely there groans every time your pussy squelches around his fingers as he punches muffled whines and whimpers from you. He crooks his fingers up suddenly in a way that makes you see stars as you writhe on his lap, your knees shooting up off the floor as you attempt to curl up on yourself, “That the spot?” He teases, relentlessly rubbing his fingers against it as his thumb quickens against your clit. He adds a third finger without warning, curling them up against that rough patch inside you as he bites down on your shoulder, muffling his own groan as he feels you clench down on his fingers. 
“You gonna come?” He mumbles, grinning like a cheshire cat when you frantically nod your head, tears leaking onto the hand still wrapped tightly around your mouth. “Open your eyes,” he commands, not stopping his movements, “Want you to watch what I’m doing to you when you fucking cum.”
At the promise of finally getting to come, your eyes shoot open as you pick your head up off his shoulder, looking down the length of your body to where his hand disappears under your leggings. You practically come undone at the sight, watching as his hand moves against you through the dark fabric, maintaining a careful rhythm. “Michael, please!” You whine against his hand, desperately trying to keep your eyes open. 
He chuckles lowly, clearly proud of how quickly he’s been able to reduce you into a begging mess, the sound reverberating off your back. “Fucking come,” he commands, doubling his efforts, “Soak my fucking hand, love.”
The coil in your stomach finally snaps and you sob, eyes snapping shut as your whole body clenches, shaking in his lap, as fireworks burst behind your eyelids. Your entire core clamps down so tight he has to fight to keep his fingers within you, muting the sounds of his groans against your neck and shoulder as he feels your cunt pulse against his fingers. He doesn’t let up, pressing incessantly against that spot within you as you come, until he finally gets what he wants – both of you groaning together, noises muffled, as a stream of fluid seems to erupt from your center, soaking his hand and the inside of your leggings, though you can’t think enough to care at the moment. 
“Goddammit,” he grunts, finally removing his hand from your leggings, running his fingers through your folds one last time just to make you squirm. Suddenly, he’s lifting you off his lap enough to turn you around, maneuvering you to face him. You’re practically boneless in his lap as he lifts you just enough to pull your leggings down over your ass, pressing his bare cock against your still throbbing center when he sets you back down, “Gonna let me fuck you, love? Hm? Want me to make you go dumb around my cock?” 
You nod your head weakly, not bothering to lift it from his shoulder as you straddle his lap. He doesn’t make you beg this time, too desperate to feel your wet heat around him, as he swiftly lifts you up again, just enough to align his length with your entrance. 
Both of you moan as he lets you sit back down, his hard length disappearing into your warmth. He holds the back of your head, pressing your mouth against his neck to muffle your cries; you can feel his jaw clench with the effort of keeping his own muted. He fills you deliciously, thick cock pressed against every part of you, as your clit presses against the small thatch of hair above his length. 
“Fuck,” he huffs, the word hissed between his teeth as he squeezes his eyes shut, savoring the way your pussy pulses around his length, the way you desperately mouth and lick at his neck, “God, knew you’d feel good.” 
Somehow, that remark works it’s way through the fog in your brain, “Hm?” you hum against his neck, your hands coming up to tangle in his golden hair, “You thought about me?” You whimper, words whiny and breathy as he rocks you against him, spearing you on his length again and again, head kissing your cervix just enough to knock the air from your lungs every time he lowers you back down. 
He sighs, as if just now realizing what he’d said, and nods, swallowing down a moan before he speaks, “‘Course I did,” he admits, grinding you down against him, his hips pressed against yours. “Looked so damn pretty in class,” he continues, “So cute all, fuck, all flushed and embarrassed every time you got asked a question.” 
His admission makes you clench around him, heat flooding through your system as you process what he’d said. Your clit grinds against his body again, just as the head of his cock brushes against that spot in your center, and it’s like your brain has been whited out, all you can do is mewl against his neck as he rocks you up and down along his cock. 
“Fuck, I feel this sweet cunt getting tight, love,” he says, breathing heavily as he gets closer to his own release, “Y’gonna come?” 
“Yes!” You whimper, voice high-pitched and broken as you nod frantically against the skin of his neck, now wet with your spit and tears as you rock yourself against him, moving your clit against the hair at the base of his cock. 
“Hold it,” he commands softly, more breathing than speaking. He chuckles when he hears you whine, loving the way you mewl for him like a soft little kitten, and the hand still holding your head against him strokes your hair, soothing you. “Want us to come together,” he huffs, cursing under his breath as he feels you grow somehow tighter around him, “Fuck, I’m close just hold on.” The hand on your hip tightens, grinding you tightly against him, groaning as he feels your center milking his cock, your walls clenching around him desperately. 
“F-fuck, Michael,” you whine, breath hot against the column of his throat as you feel yourself tipping over, “Please! Please I can’t hold it, please!” You beg beautifully, weeping against his skin, trying so hard to keep it down to a whisper so you don’t draw attention, not this close to your release. 
“Where, fuck,” he curses, pulling your head up to look in your eyes, the blue in his nearly swallowed by blackness, “Tell me where.” He pants, his voice urgent.
“Inside me!” You breathe, cunt clenching around him as you feel him twitch inside you.
He groans, forehead resting against your shoulder for a second as he tries to maintain control, both of his hands gripping your ass hard enough to leave bruises, “Are you s–”
“Yes!” You nod, resting your forehead against his when he picks his head back up, “‘M on the pill.” You reassure him as you keep nodding. The two of you move together for a few more seconds, wildly grinding together, before the coil in your stomach is finally wound too tight, “Michael, oh, fuck!”
“Fuck,” he gasps, seeming to get somehow thicker inside you, “Come for daddy, fuck, be good and come.” He commands, his own voice low and frenzied.
Hearing him call himself that does you in, and you shatter around him, walls gripping him tightly. You open your mouth, unable to control a loud moan, which he quickly hushes by pressing his lips against yours, licking into your mouth as he thrusts up into your center harshly a few times, each rise of his hips accompanied by a grunt into your waiting mouth as you mewl at the heat of his cum filling you up, extending your own release. 
The two of you stay quiet for a moment, breathing heavily as you sweetly kiss, tiredly pressing your lips together. Finally, you pull away from him giggling shyly when you meet his eyes, blushing as you feel his length slowly softening inside you. “Getting shy on me now?” He teases, smiling at you as he gently plays with your hair. 
You smile back at him for a second before suddenly coming to your senses and remembering where you are, “Shit,” you whisper, hopping up off his lap, “I cannot believe we just did that!” You quickly scan the floor with wide eyes, shoulders visibly relaxing when you still don’t see anyone.
“Wasn’t in my plan,” Michael starts, tucking his member back into his boxers and zipping up his jeans, “But I’m certainly not complaining.” He finishes, smirking at you before standing. He leans down, helping you pull up your leggings. He doesn’t miss the way you grimace when the damp, now unpleasantly cool, fabric presses against you. “Sorry,” he apologizes, gesturing to them, “I should’ve…controlled myself better with that one.” He finishes, awkwardly scratching at his chin. 
You laugh quietly, trying to play it off although you’re dreading the half hour train ride back to your flat. That feeling doubles when you look down, eyes widening as you see the dark patch around your crotch, hardly visible on the dark fabric but enough that it makes you nervous, “Getting home is gonna be fun.” You joke, turning to begin gathering your things. 
You’ve gotten your textbook put back into your backpack when you feel a tap on your shoulder; turning your head, you look wide-eyed when you see him sheepishly smiling at you, holding his red sweater out as he stands in a band t-shirt, “Here,” he says softly, waving the sweater at you, “You need it more than I do and it’s my fucking fault anyway.”
You blush, taking the sweater from him with a small thank you, tying it around your waist as he busies himself with picking up his things, before putting the rest of yours into your backpack as well, “Oh, you didn’t have to do that!” You tell him as you finish situating his sweater around you, satisfied that the stain is covered.
He huffs out a laugh, “You sucked my cock on the floor of a library,” he jokes, eyes sparkling with mischief yet again, “S’the least I could do.” 
You laugh, playfully shoving at his shoulder as you put your backpack on. The floor is truly, blessedly, empty as the two of you leave and walk downstairs, not seeing anyone on the second floor either and only a few stragglers on the main floor at this hour on a Saturday evening. He pushes open one of the heavy wooden doors at the entrance, holding it open for you as you duck under his arm. The door thuds closed behind you as you both stand outside the library, the air cold now that the sun’s gone down. 
“I really like them, that band,” you say, nodding to his shirt, “Their last album’s really good.”
“Oh!” He says, eyebrows raising in surprise, “You know them?” He asks, smiling when you nod again, “Their new album is probably my favorite too, actually.” The two of you stand in a comfortable silence for a second later before he notices you shiver as a breeze blows through the stoney courtyard. “D’you live close to campus?”
“Half hour on the train,” you shrug, pulling your phone out to check the time, “I should probably go soon if I’m gonna catch the next one…”
“You could come to mine?” He asks, his voice hopeful, “It’s only a walk from here, maybe fifteen or twenty minutes?”
Your eyes widen, having not expected his invitation, but you nod nonetheless, “If you’re sure,” he nods, “Then, yeah! That would be great.” You smile, walking beside him as you start heading in the direction of his flat. 
“Would you maybe want to get lunch sometime?” He asks, glancing down at you.
“I would love that,” you smile, your hand brushing against his as you continue down the sidewalk, “I think I might need more tutoring, too…”
His hand catches yours, your fingers intertwining as he smirks, “Will you suck my cock every time?” He teases, grinning as you laugh, the sound echoing off the buildings and filtering into the night air. 
Told you so. The voice in the back of your mind echos as you lean your head on Michael’s shoulder.
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jaylaxies · 1 year
Text
CONFLICT OF INTEREST
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PAIRING: pool cleaner!heeseung × rich fem!reader
GENRE/CW: slightly perv!heeseung, profanities, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), slight voyeurism, mentions of sunghoon, slight public sex, fingering and cunnilingus, penetration, usage of nicknames and degradation.
WC: 6.7k (6701) words
SYNOPSIS: spending all his money on video games, heeseung was left with no other choice but to work part time to earn some extra cash, he was overwhelmed to find out how much your father was willing to pay for a pool cleaner, grabbing that opportunity and applying for the same, not knowing that he’d be dealing with a spoiled little princess, who’s also a feast for his eyes.
WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni
A/N: ohmygod hello everyone, guess who’s back after the longest break ever! i missed writing so much and i couldn’t come back here without a fic for y’all sooo have this lil gift from me! <3 also thankyou sm @criceofpain for helping me w the title! i hope y'all will enjoy this! :3 all likes, comments, reblogs and feedbacks are so highly appreciated! it keeps me motivated! iloveyou all <33
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Silence.
That’s all you heard after waking up from your cozy sleep. Living in a mansion like yours would be everyone’s dream. Having rich and working parents only added on to that, giving others a misconception of how your life would be full of freedom.
You had more than fifteen rooms in your ‘small mansion’, three of them being reserved for the stay-in staff. They felt more like family to you than your own family did, your parents being absent whenever you needed them the most, you could count the times you saw them in a year.
Which brings you back to how you developed the need to be a brat — to grab your parent’s attention. It started off when you were a kid, stayed as you grew up into an adult, coming to a stage where you completely disregarded other’s feelings, not having in you to pay attention to them.
Being called a ‘rich brat’ was something you’d grown accustomed to, no one tried to get close to you in order to find your true personality, they only came for money and a short lived reputation of being your ‘friend’.
“You have to stop texting while eating, darling,” your mother’s voice boomed up in the expansive area of your dining room.
The irk in her usual dulcet voice was enough for you to understand that her current tone was laced with disappointment, your father barely speaking anything as usual, plausibly not finding you important enough to waste his energy on.
You simply hated when your parents were back at home, invading your personal space, it was one of the rare times they came back without much of an announcement, ruining your whole week, knowing they’d pass comments which would lead to massive breakdowns and again, not a single soul would help you through it, you’d be alone, as always.
Instead of eating, you found that playing with your spoon and salad would be a better option, your appetite leaving the second you learned about your parent’s arrival.
They were quick eaters, leaving you to eat by yourself soon after ruining your day. You sighed, getting up to shower, punching the hard tiled wall to release your pent up frustration, secretly hoping to find someone who’d care for you genuinely, unlike your parents who did so superficially.
The weather was rather breezy, clouds covering up the sky, resembling your mood in a manner. You were quick to dress up in your newest Chanel outfit, matching it with the perfect pair of heels you could find in your never ending walk-in closet.
Dressing up was therapeutic for you. It gave you confidence to portray yourself just how you’d wanted to, strong and bold, not requiring anyone’s support.
Isa:
Let’s skip the first lecture today :3
You:
Can’t, my parents are back at home, and if they find out abt me leaving the class thennn :)
Isa:
Babe oh no, I’ll save you a seat and get a frappe for you :(
You:
You’re an angel truly, mwah <3
You smiled, locking your phone and getting into your car, deciding to drive by yourself today. Isa was your best friend and you’d swear she was the only person who understood you on the spiritual basis, having gone through the same story of having absentee parents.
The difference would be your personality, hers being sweet and bubbly, yours being bratty and intimidating. You complemented each other perfectly.
The guards opened the gate to your mansion for you to drive away, your eyes rolling at the sight of a poster mentioning how your family needed a pool cleaner.
“Why did they build three pools if they couldn’t even maintain it, bet they haven’t once used it,” you muttered under your breath.
You didn’t notice a boy stopping by to read the very same poster just as you drove away.
He was quick to click a picture of the very same, making sure he doesn’t forget the details given below, walking further towards the mansion adjacent to yours, waiting in front of the huge gate which opened up as his friend came into view with his car, asking him to get inside the car quickly.
“The fuck were you waiting for there? We’re late already!” Sunghoon asked, running his hands through this hair as he stepped on the accelerator.
“I’m broke,” Heeseung explained, causing Hoon to laugh out of nowhere.
“Yeah? Spent all your money on video games again?” He asked, amused.
Heeseung rolled his eyes, “yeah, but it was a limited edition and I had to get it!” He argued, “and now my parents have decided to not give me pocket money for the whole month. I’ll have to earn it someway or the other.”
“That still doesn’t explain why you were standing in front of Y/n’s place.”
“Y/n? I don’t know, I saw this poster saying that they needed a pool cleaner and the amount they’re willing to pay is huge,” he explained, already deciding that he’ll apply for it the first thing after school.
“You don’t know her? Where the fuck are you living dude?” Hoon gave him a look.
“What’s so special about her? Is she hot?” Heeseung asked, looking at Hoon who shook his head in disappointment at his friend before simply smirking.
“You’ll see.”
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Heeseung wondered if he’d get to see you today. The chances were high with the onset of summer vacation, you’d be at home, however he wasn’t sure if you’d come into his spectrum of vision, he always seemed to miss you by a minute or two.
He was at your place, the guard allowed him to enter and guided him towards the pool area.
He was in shorts and a casual T-shirt as his job would most definitely cause him to get wet while getting the pool cleaned.
His lips were bitten in concentration as the house helper guided him as to how to go on about his task, and soon, he was whistling while waiting for the water to be drained out after he used the net to get the leaves and the particles floating around on the water surface.
He decided to sit down on the sunlounger while waiting, scrolling down Instagram to catch up on the posts he had missed.
You were in your room, sighing for the umpteenth time. You hated the atmosphere in your home, it was tense as your parents had fought early in the morning about tarnishing the family reputation.
Ironic coming from them.
Both of them stormed out of the home soon, wanting a break from the other, leaving you all to yourself for the day.
Seeing as you had nothing better to do at the given moment, you opted to go for a swim in the pool as you put on a black one piece swimsuit, taking your sunscreen bottle along with the few things you’d need there.
However, you did not expect to see a stranger casually sitting in one of your sun loungers by the biggest pool as the water drained out, just like the plan you had for swimming.
Ignoring the new addition to your leisure time, you went ahead to sit by the second pool, which was already cleaned by the old cleaner you had hired, the one who left the job out of nowhere.
The water was lukewarm when you dipped your legs in it, kicking the water softly, which gained the attention of the boy in shorts.
His whistling stopped as he stared at your side profile from a distance, eyes taking in your figure which was clad in black which fit you well, he gulped, his tongue swiped down his lower lip when his eyes stopped to look at your legs, and how glossy and plump your lips looked in the sunlight, the light breeze swayed your open hair and how your hands look so small compared to his, making him wonder how they’d look holding his—
You turned your head to look his way, eyes sharp which was enough to break his train of thoughts, feeling as if you were being stared at, he turned his head in record time to avoid your gaze, and you noticed he was just using his phone.
Shrugging, you got up to get on one of the sun loungers with an umbrella to put on your sunscreen, missing the way Heeseung’s eyes flickered over to you from time to time as he concluded the cleaning process to fill up the freshwater now.
Your skin glowed with the extra moisture from the sunscreen but he noticed how you struggled with rubbing it on your back.
His hands itched to do that for you, he couldn’t take his eyes off you the entire time he was at your place, but what bothered him is that you didn’t look up at him even once, until he got into the stalls and came out after changing into his decent outfit as his shorts had gotten wet from the water.
It was the exact time you got up to get into the newly cleaned pool, “good work—” you started to say.
Heeseung was shocked, he never pegged you to start a conversation, nevertheless, a little smirk settled on his face when he turned around to see your pretty face up close, “Heeseung,” he finished your sentence, “and thank you.”
You nodded in acknowledgment, looking at his face clearly for the first time since he arrived.
He had the most perfect nose you had ever come across, his lips looked delicate and pink, his eyes summing up his face to look innocent, and hair shiny yet messy.
It seemed as if you had eye candy for the job of the pool cleaner.
Without extending the conversation, you got into the pool, soaking up your body fully before you started to swim.
Heeseung stood there watching you shamelessly, hand in his pocket as you stopped to swim closer to the edge, water dripping down your chin as your looked up at him in question, “you can leave now,” you said, but the smirk he had on his face was enough to confirm that his innocent looking eyes are deceiving in all ways.
“I’m just waiting for the helper aunt to get my pay for the day,” he said innocently.
You almost scoffed, “go wait by the front gate,” you said, pointing towards the exit area with a sickeningly sweet smile.
“The view isn’t as nice there,” he nonchalantly said.
“Excuse me?” You said in a beat, looking at him with disbelief.
“I meant, the palm trees and the flowers here are better than the fountain near the gate area, also, the helper aunt asked me to wait here,” he shrugged, acting as if he was naive.
“Right,” you rolled your eyes, “she’s here now you can leave,” you gave him a tight lipped smile, resuming your swimming session.
He tried to contain his laugh, it was already fun to tease you, not to mention how you looked so attractive when wet, in the water of course.
“Good bye then,” he winked at you before leaving.
You watched his long legs quickly getting away from the pool area.
“What a creep,” you muttered, already planning ideas to get him off his high horse.
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You were sunbathing the next day, not once thinking that Heeseung would come again, but he did.
He wore a deep grey tank top and black shorts as he focused on cleaning the two smaller pools.
Thankfully, he wasn’t much of a bother that day, he simply did his work, after greeting you with a slick smile, of course.
It was clear that he stopped to stare your way from time to time, you wore dark tinted goggles just to catch him doing so, scoffing before you went inside your room, not having it in you to deal with him.
You loved to swim, it was a major stress reliever for you, the next two days were peaceful for you, your parents were out of town and there was no trace of Lee Heeseung at your place.
Sunghoon had visited you that night, inviting himself in for dinner, wanting to check up on you after hearing the news about your parents arrival.
“—They’re driving me insane, I could be simply breathing, and they would say that I am breathing wrong, I have no clue how to deal with this and I am so tired already, not to mention how the new pool cleaner is so infuriating.” You groaned, finishing up your rant as you filled him in on everything that happened ever since your parents came back.
His eyebrows raised at your last comment, “the new pool cleaner, huh?” He chuckled.
You nodded, taking a bite of the pizza you had ordered, “his name is Heeseung, he’s like an actual creep, he stares at me while working, I literally cannot go to swim whenever he’s around,” you ranted.
“Trust me I know him,” Sunghoon rested his forehead on his hand, not believing that Heeseung would actually act so shamelessly, yet it was comedic in a way.
“You do?” You asked.
“He’s my closest friend, Y/n.” Sunghoon was amused how both you and Heeseung didn’t know about each other up until he started working for you, “you’d know if you liked me even a bit,” he smirked, and looked crazy handsome doing so.
“Oh shut up,” you laughed, glad that Sunghoon was here to lighten up the mood, “I didn't know you had such friends.” Distaste was clear in your voice.
“He’s not a bad guy, okay? He’s just—” Hoon stopped to find the right word.
“Just?” You urged him to continue.
“Just stupid at times, yeah,” he shook his head.
“Right,” you said, laughing.
“If he bothers you, just punch him or whatever,” he said casually.
Maybe you’ll take up on Sunghoon’s advice on that.
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The next few days were peaceful, headphones shutting out the world as you completed your holiday assignments sitting at the poolside area with your laptop in front of you, yet he had something or the other to say.
“Oh, you’re doing the assignments already?” He asked over your headphones, speaking loud, standing next to your seat.
You nodded, not giving him the time of your day.
“Do you need help?” He couldn’t keep his mouth shut.
“Does it look like I want help?” You asked, removing your headphones and shades.
“Honestly? Your essay looks pretty perfect as of now—” he started to comment.
“That was a rhetorical question,” you deadpanned, closing your laptop and going back inside.
You knew he wasn’t this dumb, he just did it on purpose to piss you off, for your attention, just like how you behaved outrageously when you wanted your parents attention.
But Heeseung? He needed to be taught a lesson and that too, very soon.
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“No, I can’t come tonight Isa, my parents want to have dinner together like a good family. Isn’t that funny?” You talked to your best friend on call, sitting by the pool yet again.
Your parents were the reason you couldn’t go out of the house anymore, they wanted you to be home, spending quality time with them, which consisted of you being judged for your every move, your parents wanting your mannerism to be proper.
“Can’t they just leave already?” You sighed as Isa tried her best to console you, saying that she’d be there whenever you’d be allowed to go out.
That call definitely heightened your spirits until someone decided to pay your pools a visit again.
One of the helpers had told you that Heeseung wasn’t working today, so you wore your comfortable two piece bikini for the swim, which you deeply regret now.
Heeseung simply wanted to see you, he loved pissing you off, knowing how much his presence bothered you.
That only made him want to do it more.
“Hey, Y/n!” He smiled your way, his perfect set of teeth coming into your vision as you looked up from the magazine you were reading, only to give him a light lipped smile with a nod.
He looked at you in amusement as you didn’t bother to spend a second more looking his way, opting to read your magazine instead.
He was particularly talkative that day, trying to get a reaction out of you but you were patient, not giving in easily until you couldn’t hold back and decided to play his game.
“Do you need help with that?” Heeseung asked, pointing towards the sunscreen which you couldn’t apply properly on your back again, he had noticed how your hands couldn’t reach your back in particular.
He just wanted an excuse to touch your soft looking skin.
Bonus for him, you were wearing a bikini which gave him access to your bare back.
He waited for a witty comeback or straight up rejected but your reply wasn’t something he was expecting, eyes widening just a fraction.
“Oh, yes! Could you please help me put sunscreen on my back?” You looked sincere as you requested this.
“Y—yes, of course I’ll help you, princess,” he smiled after overcoming the shock, rushing to wash his hands clean, despite them being clean already before he came over to you.
“Fuck,” he muttered as he saw you sitting down on the sunlounger with your back exposed to him.
He wasn’t being subtle while staring at your ass either, he was simply glad you were facing the other way as he took some sunscreen and started massaging your shoulders, applying the right amount of pressure.
You bit your lip, hating how good his hands felt massaging your body, but you had it under control.
He took his sweet time rubbing your back, before he reached your lower back. He was having the time of his life, your skin felt even softer than he had imagined and he was surprised about how you didn’t pass any comment throughout this.
Him being sneaky was the exact thing you were waiting for, his hand reaching close to your chest after he applied cream to your clavicle region.
You turned around and grabbed his wrist, bending it down and pulling him close enough to be on your face level, you stopped your mind from accepting how good it felt, you simply hated Heeseung.
“Ouch, fuck,” he cussed, not expecting you to be this strong, the pain subsided in a second as he looked you up close, your scent infiltrating his mind.
“Don’t play with me, Heeseung,” you said in a deeper octave, looking right into his eyes.
He smiled, which only urged you to continue.
“Do you have no shame? I’ll have you fired if you pull this shit again,” you warned him, letting go of his hand and standing up to leave.
However, he was quick to grab your wrist and spin you around, so you bumped right into his chest, which was hard.
“What the fuck—” you exclaimed but your voice died down soon.
His hand reached to the one spot on your neck which had sunscreen that wasn’t spread properly. He simply bit his lip and used two of his fingers to massage that spot on your neck.
It must have been your sensitive spot because your legs suddenly felt like they were jelly, your breathing quickened as you stared at his annoyingly attractive face.
“All done,” he whispered in your ear, leaving your wrist as he only smirked, walking back to do his work, leaving you stunned as you rushed inside due to embarrassment.
No fucking way you enjoyed those ten seconds with him.
As for Heeseung, he couldn’t stop thinking of how hot you looked, trying to be angry but being a mess in his presence, just thinking about your expression and your outfit together gave him a boner.
“Y/n,” he groaned with one hand on the shower wall, supporting his tall frame as the other squeezed his dick, jerking off to your thoughts, “oh god, fuck!” He grunted, thinking about how tight you’d feel around him, the scenarios were enough for him to shoot out his load, smirking at the ideas in his head.
He just needed to push you more.
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The events of that day replayed in your mind an unhealthy amount of times, you never wanted to see him again, yet you wanted the exact same thing.
You hated it.
You hated how good it felt, having his big hands on your body and you most certainly didn’t have it in you to face him today.
All you wished for was to read a book in peaceful silence, but yet again, your space was invaded when a certain Bambi eyed boy made an appearance at your place, despite it not being the day of his schedule.
Still, he had the audacity to greet you before he started singing while doing his tasks for the day.
The infuriating part? His voice was a mixture of honey and chocolate, and everything sweet in this world because you had never heard a voice to angelic before.
Not that it was enough to woo you.
Sighing, you closed your book and decided to go for a swim, but again, you were stopped.
“Wait!” Heeseung exclaimed, bringing out the cleaning net to get rid of one leaf that was in the huge pool, looking back at you with a goofy smile as he held the leaf up.
“Okay. So, you stopped me from going in because of a leaf?” You folded your arms on your chest as you tried to make sense of the situation.
“Couldn’t let a princess swim in the dirty pool,” he said, eyes getting bigger, feigning innocence.
He was a nuisance and you were running thin on patience. Your mother had graciously spoiled your day saying your manners are out of line, your father added to it, talking about how vacations were a waste of time for you.
“Aw, really?” You asked, faking your voice to sound sweet and thankful before you took a step close to him.
His eyes looked at you expectantly, but yet again, you pulled something he wasn’t ready for.
With a big smile on your face, you pushed him into the pool, hard and fell down with a big splash.
“Oops,” you said once he came out of the water, brushing his wet hair away as he breathed hard, his clothes clinging on to his body.
He looked hot.
You tried not to look at his body as you bent down to talk to him, “aw, now you’ll have to clean the whole pool, it’s so disgustingly dirty now that you’re in there.” You smiled innocently.
He poked his tongue through this cheek and gave you no time before grabbing onto your arm and pulling you right in with him.
You gasped for air, your whole body getting soaked with water as you came out just in front of him, a devilish smirk on his face.
“Are you insane?” You almost screamed at him but he grabbed your waist and pulled you closer with a serious expression on his face.
You could see his face with the top most clarity up close, his wet hair messily covering his forehead and eyes, still he looked attractive.
“Is this what you do when someone tries to help you, princess?” His voice came out deeper and his hold on you tightened.
You were glad that there were no helpers around the pool area or you would die of embarrassment, not to mention how your parents would react knowing about this situation.
“Don’t fucking call me that,” you whispered in the same tone, maintaining the eye contact.
“Yeah, right you think of yourself as the queen,” he went on.
“Stop,” you warned.
“But in reality you’re just a pretty, spoiled princess, aren't you?” He taunted in a voice that gave you goosebumps.
Giggly Heeseung was attractive enough, but him being serious was something that had you in a trance.
“Shut up,” you said in a measly voice, head fuzzy.
“Do I need to show you who you are, huh? You’re a little princess,” he went on.
“Shut the fuck up,” you raised your voice, the feeling down in your lower abdomen was something you hadn’t felt so strongly before.
“Make me,” was all he said with a smirk.
Yet what you did next was something he wasn’t prepared for.
It all happened in less than a second, your fingertips grabbing his chin, pulling him closer to your face with a gasp as you captured his lips into a rushed kiss, his nose poking yours softly.
This man drove you crazy, to the point where you had to give in just to get a taste of him.
He leaned back to look into your eyes, breaking the kiss just to see you breathe in deeper and shy away, but he didn’t let you do that.
His hand rested on the back of your head as he pulled you into a deeper, passionate kiss, causing you to whimper in his mouth, holding on to his shoulders for support.
You gasp as his hands roam around your body, leaving the places where you wanted him to touch you the most, the frustration causing you to moan into his mouth, against his smirk.
It was a rhythm of desire, passion, and exasperation. The kiss got sloppier by second and you both had to lean back to breathe. With your chest heaving up and down, you dared to look into his eyes which were clouded with lust.
Each touch, each movement from his side impacted your body in a way you never thought it would, you shivered with his touch, the smirk never leaving his lips.
“So sensitive,” he muttered, trailing his finger down your body as you still held on to him, your legs felt weaker than ever.
“Heeseung—” you tried to speak up, but only a moan left your mouth when he traced his finger on your clothed pussy.
“Guess what, princess? You’re wet,” he pointed out, coming closer to bite your ear, causing you to squirm in his hold, “and it’s not because of the water.”
“Fuck,” you let out, mind going blank.
You loved being in control, putting people in their places and ordering them around. But you never thought that being treated like this would arouse you to this point.
To the point that you’d let Heeseung do anything.
He took you out of the pool, dragging you to the changing stalls, pushing you against the door after he locked it.
“You look so innocent, I could ruin you,” he said, folding his long fingers around your neck, applying slight pressure to it.
“I know,” you spoke mindlessly and Heeseung was amused at how easily you gave in.
“Yeah? No snarky comebacks or threats this time?” He teased.
“I’m leaving,” you said, embarrassed and trying to get away with your face burning with shame, but again, it wasn’t up to you as Heeseung pushed his body closer to yours, sandwiching you between him and the wall.
“You’re not going anywhere, darling,” he whispered, pushing your bikini panties to the side.
His fingers teased at your entrance and you unconsciously bucked your hips to meet him. He grabbed your hips to stay still before moving his fingers on your wet slit again, poking his finger on your entrance yet not letting it slide in fully to your dismay.
“Please,” you whined louder than before.
“Please what, princess?” He stopped moving his fingers all together just to hear your reply.
“Please fuck me,” you let out slowly, embarrassment creeping up your neck.
“That’s a good girl, but sadly you won't get it so easily,” he said and without any warning, he pushed a finger inside your pussy, which was wet and needy and it sucked him in.
His deep grunts only turned you on more, his hard clothed cock rubbing against your ass as he tore your bikini away, adding another finger to fill your pussy, reaching a deep spot which had you seeing stars.
Your glossy eyes followed his fingers as he sniffed it, “smells so sweet,” he said in a deep breath, giving you goosebumps, his tongue swirled around, tasting your juices and humming along.
“Oh baby you’re dripping,” he smirked, getting on his knees, putting one leg on his shoulder as he wasted no time in indulging himself in eating your sweet pussy, tongue lapping at your juices and you had to bite your fist to contain your noises.
You were so close.
His finger teased your clit to heighten the stimulation, and it worked wonders as it had you rolling your eyes to the back of your head, whimpering and crying.
You reached your limit when he pushed his tongue into your hole, a loud moan leaving your lips as he went on to eat you out.
“Hee—oh my god,” you cried out, falling apart on his tongue, and he lapped up the last drop of the juices you had spilled.
You looked at him, looking sinister, his lips shining and eyes glistening with amusement as he grabbed your chin and kissed you right on mouth, giving you a taste of yourself.
You rubbed his cock through his shorts, getting a scoff out of him, “not so fast, princess. You’ll have to show me how much you want it. I’ll go take care of it till then and clean your pool, which is oh so disgusting.” He smirked, getting out and into the showering stall, leaving you dazed and wet.
You had to have his cock.
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You wouldn’t admit how much you had wanted him to fuck you directly to his face, so instead, you decided to be a menace and show him what he’s been missing.
He came back after two days, just as the schedule of his job. And it was a lucky day for you since half of the working staff had been granted a holiday today, leaving you with only the chefs and a security guard who wouldn’t ever come into the pool area.
Heeseung’s duality scared you, he came in as usual, wearing a blank tank and shorts this time, greeting you with a smile, “morning, princess,” he smirked, yet looked innocent.
“Hey, Hee,” you purposely called him a nickname, causing his smile to grow before he looked at your bikini top, which was not tied properly and showed more skin than usual.
You knew that would get his attention.
Standing up, you stretched your arms and started walking towards him, your movement caused the knot to open up fully, your tits coming into display for him.
It was so attractive how his jolly and innocent eyes turned dark within a second, but you only giggled, pushing his limits, “oops, i guess the knot wasn’t tied properly, can you help me, Hee?” You asked with a smile.
He scoffed, “that desperate for my cock?” He asked, biting his lower lip.
“I’m just asking for help,” you tried to reason and hide your guilty smile.
“Such a pathetic needy thing, you just want to be fucked, don’t you?” He took a step further and you stepped back, the butterflies in your lower abdomen not calming down for even a second, “maybe I’ll have to fuck some manners into you,” he smirked, and pushed you on the couch near the last pool, getting on top of you, ignoring your lips as he trailed his own on your neck, making sure to apply more pressure while kissing your sweet spot. Your bikini top was long discarded in the pool, your bikini bottoms joined it soon as you laid below him.
“Already wet? Seems like you’ve been waiting eagerly,” he commented, sliding his fingers into your pussy, scissoring it open for his cock to fit into your tight hole, “so ready for my dick,” he chuckled.
“Put it in,” you whimper, causing him to shut your mouth, his lips on your as he swiped his tongue on your lower lip, a gasp leaving your mouth as you kissed him back with need.
He pushed his pants down and stroked his cock a few times, all while keeping you busy with his kisses. Without giving you much warning, he poked the tip of his cock at the your entrance, your eyes widening as he deepened the kiss, pushing his hips forward, stuffing your clenching walls full of his thick length.
“Oh—fuck!” You gasped and moaned.
A smirk was plastered on his face with how needy he made you, your wetness allowing him to bottom out easily, giving you no time to adjust to his length before he started to thrust in even faster and deeper, sending you into a state of the bliss of arousal.
With your eyes rolling back, you couldn’t form sentences as he ruined you, whispering dirty nothings into your ear as he nibbled on it.
You were committing the filthiest sin yet it felt like heaven.
“So wet, so fucking tight, all for my cock, look how you’re clenching so desperately,” he chuckled.
His balls smacked against your ass, he was painfully hard and you were equally aroused, not knowing how much more you could hold it in.
“What if someone walks in and sees how dirty of a slut you are?” He continued to talk, which only made you wetter, “you would like that, won’t you? Me fucking you behind your parents.” He thrusted harder, hitting your g-spot with ease.
His hips moved with such fluidity, it made you wonder how many people he had fucked before to get this good at fucking, you were obsessed already.
It took all of your control to not scream and whimper out loud, the stretch was nothing like you had experienced before, you couldn’t help but chant his name like a mantra, over and over again, head clouded with him.
Heeseung twitched inside your pussy, pulling you up and turning you around with ease, pushing your head down and holding your ass up as he started fucking you from behind, a hand grabbing your tit while the other played with your clit.
You whimpered, gritting your teeth as the sudden tight feeling began to overwhelm your trembling frame, and he knew you wouldn’t be able to hold his back anymore, his movements getting sharper as he smacked your ass.
“Go ahead, kitten,” he whispered and that did it for you.
Shaking and whining, you finally reached your high, all senses heightened as you made a mess all over his cock.
He groaned deeply, emptying his cum into your pussy with a few thrusts, making sure you were full of him.
He stood back just to watch his cum dripping pussy and fucked out expression.
“Better start taking birth control from now,” he smirked, kissing your lips with a smack.
“Why? Will you fuck me again?” You asked, acting like a brat, “I’ll pay you.”
He scoffed, “keep your cash to yourself, queen, I’ll make sure you won’t be able to stand the next time,” he gritted out.
To his amusement, you tried to stand up, only to fall back down on the couch, “guess you can’t do it, and to think I went easy on you,” he spoke up, embarrassing you again.
Being degraded by him was your new fetish.
“What if my dad catches us?” You asked, looking away, trying to cover yourself with a towel as you changed the topic.
“Well, you’ll have to learn to be silent to not get caught, princess,” he spoke, coming closer and taking the towel away from you, gaze darkening at your figure again, aiming for a round two thinking no one was watching.
However, a certain boy named Sunghoon stood on his balcony from the mansion next to yours, the view being clear enough to show your pool area and your activities, his hand stroking his cock firmly as he watched Heeseung fuck you for the second time.
A smirk played on his face as he fucked his palm as he formulated a plan in his head.
He simply knew he’d be joining you both the next time.
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THANK YOU FOR READING! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT <3
TAGLIST:
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thishazbinamistake · 4 months
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Spoilers.
Episode 6 was overall pretty decent, but it was the episode that truly made me realize just how much I hate the swearing in Vivzie's shows. Like, I know people like to joke about her bizarre obsession with cursing, but in my opinion, it genuinely, actively harms the worldbuilding and tone of her series.
In Hell, people swearing makes sense, and as obnoxious as I find it, I can look past it. Hell is supposed to be chaotic and raunchy, so it checks out that its residents would have little regard for politeness and social etiquette. But when we're introduced to Heaven, this supposedly very clean-cut and conservative society, and the angels regularly curse there as well, it makes the whole dichotomy between the two feel much weaker. It would be one thing if it was just Adam who swore a lot, and he was treated as sort of an outlier, but literally the first angel Charlie and Vaggie meet at the golden gates says fuck! Why?! There was no point to it. It wasn't even funny!
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And then, there was the court room scene. As always, Adam is cursing every other word because that's his entire personality, I guess. None of the others seem to think anything of this angel talking like this, but when the literal princess of Hell says fuck once, Sera and Emily look all shocked and disapproving like it's the most blasphemous thing they've ever heard. Why?! Have you not been hearing the shit that's been coming out of Adam's mouth for the past 10 minutes??
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It would have made way more sense and honestly been way funnier if angels absolutely never swore, and Charlie swearing was sort of a culture shock to them. And if they really wanted to keep Adam as a foul-mouthed dickhead, he could have at least put up a more polite and chaste front to give the impression that he's a well-behaved angel in front of the Seraphim. It was so hypocritical and nonsensical to the point it honestly feels like a writing oversight.
By far the worst example of all this to me is the ending of the episode. It's revealed to Charlie that Vaggie was once an exterminator, to the shock and horror of the both of them. This is portrayed as an extremely serious and dire revelation that could potentially change the two's relationship forever. I felt a lot of suspense, and it honestly made me hold my breath for a moment...
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...but then it's immediately followed up by Adam saying "Oh, fuck yes! Suck it, bitches!" in his annoying surfer-dude voice and it just completely shatters the tone to pieces. Any and all tension is just gone.
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This is just straight up awful writing. Like we laugh at the memes but I genuinely hate Vivzie's juvenile obsession with swearing. It's not funny, it's not subversive, it's not even mature; it's just distracting, cringeworthy, and obnoxious. We can't even have a single serious moment without it being ruined with "haha fuck lol bitch!!" all because going three seconds without a swear word apparently makes Vivziepop break out into hives.
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yumeka-sxf · 5 months
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A chronological analysis on Twilight and Yor - Part 21
*This is part of an ongoing post series. If you missed the Introduction/Part 1, click here*
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The next morning, Twilight muses to himself that there are still things in the world he doesn't understand, but nevertheless, a spy must overcome fear of the unknown. While his face and tone are dead serious, it's comical that the thing that caused him to burst into this heavy-handed inner monologue in the first place is none other than his misinterpretation of Anya's reactions the previous day. AniTrendz described the humor of this scene perfectly by stating that "Loid really spent all morning acting dramatic when he's just sad that his daughter called him lame."
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And yes, he really was bothered by the fact that he's still having trouble understanding Anya's emotions. While her mental well-being is important for Operation Strix, he also cares very much how she views him as a father. Unfortunately for Twilight, this trend will continue – after a whole day of fun activities, he's devastated to see the scowl on Anya's face when they're having dinner that evening. And, once again, he blames himself and even thinks that Anya could possibly hate him.
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As I've mentioned before, Twilight is always cool and confident when it comes to his spy missions, but whenever Yor or Anya are upset, he becomes a second-guessing nervous wreck! It's telling how frazzled he gets when trying to figure out what's going on in their minds versus anyone else. If Anya and Yor's happiness is tied to a mission, and he's always calm and collected about his other missions, why would he get so bent out of shape about them in particular? I think we all know the answer to that.
It's also important to note that the couple of days on the cruise are likely the longest amount of time Twilight has been alone with Anya, without having Yor for parenting support. If she were with him during all this, there's no doubt that her patience with Anya's antics and the encouraging words she always offers, would put his mind at ease. But without her around, there's no one to buffer his constant freak outs when trying to analyze the mind of a child. His anxiety gets so bad that Anya even starts to feel bad about it.
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Meanwhile, the big showdown on the deck between Yor and the assassins has so far been the most gritty and violent scene in the series. Endo has stated in the fanbook that making Yor likable while also giving her a profession that involves killing people, was difficult (though I think he's done a stellar job!) A reoccurring theme in Spy x Family is how the tragedy of war has led to otherwise good people partaking in immoral acts, whether for survival or because they're brainwashed into thinking that the side they're on is the right and just one. It's not only Twilight and Yor, but other characters as well, such as Yuri, Sylvia, even the young terrorists from the doggy crisis arc, as well as the assassins on the cruise – the factions that they work for, the politics behind their decisions, and the jobs they're assigned to do, are not framed as heroic nor completely evil, only the aftermath of political turmoil that the next generation has to suffer for.
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In Part 13, I mentioned an interview in the fanbook where Endo states that the Forgers should not be seen as virtuous role models…he doesn't think it's correct to only see their "nice family" side. Despite all the comedic antics in the series that sometimes stretch the veil of realism, one very realistic aspect is that none of the characters are depicted as "black and white," "heroes and villains," and their professions are portrayed as more tragic and ugly than "cool." This is in contrast to other shonen series, where the main protagonists are often portrayed as role models who fight for noble causes we can't help but support, while banishing only the most wicked of villains. And often these protagonists started out "normal" only to suddenly gain superpowers, opportunities to go on grand adventures, and have big battles against villains. But Twilight and Yor are the opposite. The series starts with them already having extraordinary abilities and exciting, dangerous jobs, so the end goal is instead for them to be able to attain a peaceful, normal life…because their professions aren't framed as wish-fulfilling but as heartbreaking, grim, and sometimes terrifying.
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Twilight and Yor's professions, as well as those of pretty much every other character in Spy x Family, have a lot of gray areas on the moral compass. This is why having a balance of both fun, slice-of-life scenarios, and spy/political action and drama conflicts, brings out the true complexity of the characters. Twilight may lie and act cold as ice towards people during his missions, but because we get to know him while he's living as Loid Forger, we can see that he's doing it for a noble cause, and underneath all that callous calculating, he's a compassionate guy who cares about the feelings of others. Likewise, we see that when she's not killing people, Yor is a total sweetheart who doesn't have a mean bone in her body, is a loving mother to Anya, selfless sister to Yuri, and, like Twilight, she does what she does because she truly believes she's doing good in the world.
If we only see Twilight and Yor as a spy and assassin, our view of them could be skewed negatively. On the other hand, if we only see them as a "nice family," we would be doing exactly what Endo warned against in his interview. But because we get to see both sides of them, we're able to relate to them even more, which makes us want to root for them. Is the immorality of their jobs too much to be forgiven, or are they righteous people who are simply victims of a cold war? Obviously if you're a fan of the series like me, you're opt to lean towards the positive view that Twilight, Yor, as well as many of the other characters, have been sorely damaged by the post-war era that they live in, but the commendable things they do far outweigh the ugliness of their professions, so they deserve a happy ending. And that's really the main appeal of the series – with all the gray areas of morality, seeing whether they can truly live happily without lies is something to look forward to.
Continue to Part 22 ->
<- Return to Part 20
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adaptacy · 7 months
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i am obsessing so hard over gale. like, i kid you not, i started out HATING him cause he was eating my artifacts and seemed completely useless in battle. but then i started a second playthru with my bf and i was like 'well im romancing astarion in my main so i GUESS i'll go for the other pretty boy'
....
it was the start of a very, very, very extreme brainrot fest.
so! as I learn more abt him (im in the shadow cursed lands rn, haven't had the sex scene with him yet so i dont know his character super well/im not super confident in portraying him) take this little snippet of wizard angst cause he needs a hug and i wanna give it to him :)
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“I reckon it’s sweet.” 
“Sweet?” 
“Sweet,” he clarified. “And smooth. Dare I say… simple. I must admit, I was somewhat befuddled with the absence of a necessity for complexities; you required no books, no training, no vexatious intricacies– it came naturally.” He remained fixated on a point off in the distance, perhaps watching the quiet rippling of the lake, just off the camp’s coast, undisturbed by the activity that usually stirred during the day. 
Peace was a mercy, and an uncommon one, but you felt it, here, with him. Like the eye of the hurricane that stalked you throughout Faerûn, the bloodshed and chaos that ruled your everyday life was far from absent, but it was silenced. Screams that echoed in your ears were muted, momentarily, granting you a glimpse of life before your adventure, before the hunt, before the cult, before the illithid’s influence. It would be short, but the fact that it occurred at all was a miracle. 
“Like wine.”
“Wine?” You chuckled, shifting a little closer, his arm coming to wrap around your shoulder, further warming you. 
“I predicted bitterness. A bite, or a sting. I’ve read stories about flavorful affections such as these. Stories. Can you believe it?”
“With how much reading you do? I can,” you hummed, resting your head against his side. 
“Tales, I believed them to be. I’ve seen love. Red love. Irascible, fractious love. Impotent, paralyzing love. Love like a raging sea. A love that I trusted. A fool I must’ve been.” There’s a short, woe-rooted chuckle that escapes him followed by a thin exhale out of necessity, out of defense. You knew who he was referencing, but you couldn’t bring yourself to mention the name. “Any sane soul would regret it.”
“Do you not?”
“There’s little time in this life– certainly, it offers no such room for regrets. I’ve wasted too many moonrises pondering the past.” His fingers graze your arm, and you allow your eyes to fall closed. “Many a wondrous thing I’ve witnessed. More than a man of my caliber should deserve. In a single lifetime, I’ve experienced more than a library's worth of literature could possibly cover.” He smiles, you can hear it in his voice. “From a mage’s best dreams to a direwolf’s worst nightmares– I’m sure I, myself, couldn’t have asked for a more thorough tour of what this plane, and a few others, have to offer.” 
“And yet there’s more.” Your remark is a light-hearted one, as you are sure everyone will have more to reflect on the closer you get to the cure you seek. 
But he sighs. A quiet one, restraint tightening his lungs, and you feel unease. “Amongst it all, I have even discovered what I once argued impossible. Simplicity. A priceless simplicity.” This time, when his arm moves, it brings you closer. He craves the contact, the connection struck between you. “Simplicity in love, of all things.”
Your eyes open to find his gaze no longer on the quiet riverbank, and instead on you. There’s a bruise on his left eyebrow, and a cut on the bridge of his nose. He’s pretty, even with the wounds, but you know they sting. A part of you feels guilty for seeing such beauty in his suffering. Deep down you know there is no Gale without suffering. 
At a glance, that’s all there is; a bruise, a cut, and a solemn smile. An exchange of pity for one another. Even for yourselves. An agreement, silent but strong. 
On further investigation, his eyes hold an unnatural glisten. Only then does it register.
“Gale…”
“It’s what’s best.” You sit up slightly, but you’re met with a gentle hush, and his smile grows, the dimples on his cheeks fired by an unknown audacity. “I’ve come to accept it. It is the decider of my fate– it always has been.”
“There are other ways,” you push out the words, and you find the bite, the sting, that he mentioned. In love, you find the pain. 
“Never did I imagine the world outside my tower to hold such beauties. Such contagious fragility. There are no books on this subject. No studies on this exchange of power. What is a puppet to do when he loses his creator? His puppeteer? When he can no longer stand, no longer dance, no longer perform? When obeying is all he knows, what does he do without direction?” 
He doesn’t sit up, he doesn’t stir. He looks back out to the waters. For guidance, maybe. For peace. For life. You’re left with no choice but to settle with the tide. A hand comes to rest on the dark imprint below his neck, desperate to find answers where the weave fails. 
“I have found simplicity. And, perhaps, that is the final step. I never imagined growing old. I suppose it isn’t meant to be.” He breathes, and you can feel the steadiness of his lungs. He isn’t scared. You can only wonder how long he’s contemplated this decision. “You see me. You look past the strings, my love, but that doesn’t mean they don’t still linger. I am but a man; I am no hero, I am no god. But if your safety is the only accomplishment I ever succeed in, I will lie satisfied in my earthly rest.”
“A few more days,” you whisper, pleading. 
“I only ask of you one thing.” Gale inhales, his heart pumping against your palm, pressing closer to his skin, desperate to feel him, to feel more than the orb, to feel more than Mystra’s design. You find his humanity in the tear on his cheek, the hair on his chest, the irregular mock of his heart’s rhythm. You find his humanity in his love, in his hopeless compassion, in his unwavering loyalty. “Don’t let that damned vampire even think about touching me.” 
He chuckles, and you do too, pulling yourself into his chest, hugging him close. He repays the affection, lips on the top of your head, his every breath lingering on your scalp. The peace remains, but you fear this may be your last serving of merciful tranquility.
You only hope it isn’t Gale’s. 
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plasticbag3207 · 3 months
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Vox: Flatscreen vs. Box (CRT)
One thing has been mildly bothering me when it comes to people’s interpretation of Vox, specifically when showing him off in older settings: his portrayal (or lack thereof) as a box TV.
Obviously we all know he was a CRT (cathode ray tube; this is the more technical name for “Box TV” or “old-style tv”). We see him with this style of TV head in the picture of him and Val on the desk in Val’s room. (S1 E2 at about 7:27)
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Not the highest quality photo, my bad, but it still gets the point across. We can also assume that this picture was probably taken in the 70s, since that’s when Valentino died. If I had to hazard a guess, I’d say late 70s, maybe early 80s.
CRT tvs have really only gone out of fashion recently, and flatscreens have only been common for the last 15-20 years. Although unlikely, it’s not impossible for Velvette to have been in Hell before Vox transferred to a flatscreen TV. Despite this, I still see a lot of people drawing Vox with a flatscreen way before they existed—or in general acting like he’s been a flatscreen way longer than he has.
I want to be clear and say that this doesn’t bother me a ton, and I still love all the art regardless. It’s just the little history nerd in me trying to point these things out and being mildly bothered by it.
I have a feeling it’s probably caused by a lot of younger people in the fandom that maybe weren’t old enough to remember their families having a CRT tv, or maybe they were born after their family had upgraded to a flatscreen? I don’t know. Maybe I’m all wrong with that idea, and the artists are purposely drawing him with a flatscreen because they prefer it?
Another headcanon of mine that I haven’t seen a ton of people talking about, that would support Vox not having a flatscreen until quite recently: new tech probably takes longer to get to hell.
When explaining this to my friend I used the analogy of how trends (fashion, architecture, lifestyle, internet, etc.) in the US tend to start on the coasts and work their way towards the center. By the time they even reach the Midwest, some of the shorter fads are already out of style on the coasts.
I sort of assumed this is how things work with hell and earth. Tech is invented/innovated on earth first, and generally takes a little longer for it to become common in Hell. Also, as far as we know (unless I’m mistaken) the main way hell finds out about the goings on on Earth is via sinners dying and relaying their expanded knowledge on to the rest of hell.
If this headcanon proves to be true, then that would push back the date when Vox upgraded to a flatscreen even more.
Idk, this is all just me rambling and just some food for thought. No hate to any artists or writers that have been portraying Vox as a flatscreen before it would make sense for him to have one.
Also rest in peace to all of the hazbin fans who were too young to have the life experience of almost being crushed by one of those old CRT TVs. Really missed out on that character building moment.
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PROPAGANDA
CHI-CHI (DRAGON BALL)
1.) okay so to start at the beginning, she was introduced as a young kid but they put her in a super revealing bikini styled outfit. pretty sure it was supposed to be armor too, so besides just being a disgusting design choice even in-universe it’s impractical. but besides that she was pretty charming as a kid, she was cute and funny and pretty tough, and had a cool gimmick in her blade/ laser helmet. even when she reappeared in late Dragon Ball, she was a bit abrasive but was overall rational and kind. she was strong enough to make it into the World Martial Arts Tournament, one of only 16 to qualify.
but come Dragon Ball Z and on, she’s reduced to just a shrill, nagging, aggressive wife and mother. all she gets to do is cook, worry, and berate her husband and sons. her physical strength is only used so she can comically hit Goku. sure its played for laughs, but he’s shown to be afraid of her. I only recall her leaving her house once or twice in DBZ. just the worst mother character stereotype, with nothing left to make her likeable. she’s portrayed as irrational but despite her aggressiveness, half the time her wants are completely reasonable. can’t blame a woman for not wanting her husband to die every other day!! her writing us ass but I still love her and she deserves better!!!
2.) So in Dragon Ball she wasn’t the BEST character to start out with. Toriyama hasn’t ever been the best at writing women or not making stupid fucking sex jokes about them. So she had to deal with that. The outfit she wore as a kid was… NOT GREAT. Let’s say that! Then in late Dragon Ball her entire character revolves around Goku and trying to marry him, which she gets by tricking Goku and getting beaten by Goku in a tournament in one hit. Not off to a great start. Then Z started and Toriyama just… gave her an ENTIRELY NEW new personality, and that new personality was just a stereotype of a tiger mom. Regardless of how correct she might’ve been about letting Gohan fight (and she WAS completely correct, he was 5-6 for a HUGE chunk of Z) the narrative frames her as a hysterical and unreasonable woman nagging at the menfolk and not letting them do things. So naturally people hate her without even considering why she’s upset because the story itself frames her as in-the-wrong. The whole franchise also just forgets that she’s a martial artist and never has her DO ANYTHING.
This is only scratching the surface, there’s a LOT more because the franchise is like 40 years old and we’d be here all day.
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3.) GODDDD okay so full disclosure i guess shonen is such an easy pick but like. out of every shonen wife she was and is THE most hated by the narrative and creator (maybe tied with sakura omfg). shes always made out to be a beast, got her fighting skills shafted after she got married, was always played like she was hysterical for worrying about her kid dying in battle, and not to mention the creator actively HATES her. like toriyama just straight up hates writing her. its bad. its really bad. shes just “bitch wife” but for no reason :(
BUMBLE (WARRIOR CATS) (CW: Domestic Abuse)
1.) Back with another Warriors submission, I bet you’ll be getting a lot from other people too LMAO. Bumble is a kittypet (housecat) who befriends the male protagonist Gray Wing’s girlfriend, Turtle Tail, and lets her stay in her house. This gets Gray Wing all pissy because he’s controlling of Turtle Tail and shares most of the wild/clan cat’s proclivity for looking down upon kittypets. Turtle Tail gets pregnant by another kittypet, Tom, who tries to control her by hiding the fact that humans take away kittens after they’re born. Eventually Bumble comes clean about it so Turtle Tail returns to the forest. Some time later, Bumble is found in the forest seeking refuge because Tom has been physically abusing her, scratching her where the humans can’t see. So, she’s CANONICALLY ACKNOWLEDGED as a domestic abuse victim (unlike Squirrelflight who meets all the textbook signs but the narrative and authors deny it). How do you think our good guy protagonists, i.e. Gray Wing “The Wise” and Turtle Tail, respond to an abuse victim seeking refuge? They tell Bumble to go home, thinking to themselves that she’s fat and soft and therefore would be useless in their group. Bumble stands up for herself and asks to speak with the leaders of the group. One of them asks if Bumble could just get along with Tom better (bro???) and when Bumble says it’s not within her control, the leader suggests being nicer to the humans instead. Another rival leader butts in and verbally abuses Bumble again by ripping into how fat and lazy and useless she would be. Despite Turtle Tail having been friends with Bumble and Bumble had helped her through her own hard times, to Gray Wing’s approval Turtle Tail chooses not to intervene as Bumble is forcibly escorted back to her abuser. But that’s not all. Later Bumble is found in the forest maimed and dying, and it seems likely that Gray Wing’s brother Clear Sky, a male with a long history of violence, is the culprit. Rather than mourn the dying innocent cat, Gray Wing’s primary concern is how other cats might be mean to Clear Sky if they think he’s a murderer, and reassures himself that refusing to help Bumble in her time of need was still the right decision.
2.) I have no idea how she managed to be written so horrifically from an abuse victim and woman (/she-cat I guess) standpoint but here we are. Okay so my memory is a bit fuzzy but basically Bumble was a character in Dawn of the Clans and a close friend to Turtle Tail, a major character, as well as a character who lived close to Tom, an abusive dickhead of a cat. Bumble was largely depicted as just a really sweet cat. Turtle Tail was very briefly the mate of Turtle Tail, but once she got pregnant, he became super violent towards both her and our gal Bumble. Tom actively hid the fact that, once her kits were old enough, Turtle Tail’s kits would probably be taken from her, and made Bumble keep quiet about this too, but Bumble eventually told Turtle Tail the truth, Turtle Tail left and Tom became extremely violent towards Bumble because of this, and was extremely abusive towards her. Eventually, Bumble ran away from him to where Turtle Tail and co were and begged to stay, since the wilderness as a whole was genuinely more safe than being around Tom was. Naturally, this meant kitty xenophobia from cats who had only arrived in that area recently, because everybody was insistent than, since she was a kittypet/house cat, things wouldn’t work out, and even her friend Turtle Tail denied her on this, insisted she was too soft to live in the wild and only sent her towards a cat Bumble wanted to convince because she was absolutely certain she’d be denied. Also our good old protagonist Gray Wing got to spend this scene being all upset about this soft cat wanting to join them to escape an abuser and was all bitter about the fact that Turtle Tail lived with her for a short period of time, and he also got to have a sweet romantic moment with Turtle Tail after denying an abuse victim an escape from her abuser. Also as much as I like Tall Shadow usually she sucked ass in the following scene because she was essentially telling Bumble to go find a way to make peace with Tom as if she was not the one being abused (Bumble pointed out that Tom was the one who would need to make peace for it to happen, not her) and that she should just make life better by going back to being a housecat and being spoiled despite the fact that she was actively at risk with her owners because of Tom. Then she leaves after being threatened by several cats there and is called soft on the way out. The next time she appears she is literally dying, and her death is just a plot device to create a stupid little mystery which is solved in a very stupid way. Also her abuser does continue to be a shithead and for some reason is fully permitted to kidnap his own children but he also gets a heroic death and the only reason I will not rant more about him is because this is too long already. Long story short Bumble deserves the world and everybody who decided not to let her escape her abuser just because they thought she was soft sucks
3.) Is nice to the group of starving, feral wild cats that left the mountains so their friends and family could have more food to eat and befriends one of them to the point of opening her home to her after she leaves the group because the guy she likes is too dumb to notice she likes him and keeps falling for his brother’s love interests.
Unfortunately, because Bumble is a house cat who lives in a house with people and not a Wild and Free cat, this is a grave and horrible crime (luring a wild cat into the safety and comforts of domesticity) and is villainized for the rest of the arc, including for things wildly out of her control
I.E.
Her owners taking in an aggressive male cat that bullies and abuses the two female cats already living there
When Bumble’s friend leaves and goes back to the wild cats, Bumble leaves her home (as the abuse as has gotten worse) to see if she could either get help or have her friend return so the abuse isn’t as bad again)
Bumble eventually dies in the wild because the feral cats all hate her for ‘stealing’ their friend and tricking her into becoming a kittypet for awhile and refuse to help Bumble adjust to wild life or even teaching her how to hunt.
They are littl e to no hard feelings at her death beyond ‘good riddance’ but the aggressive tomcat that chased her out of her home is later regarded with good feelings and regret at such a ‘good, heroic cat’ passing when he dies despite him literally never doing a good or kind thing in his life and actually causing trouble for the wild cats right before dying
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theheirofthesharingan · 4 months
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You know, I think a lot of hate and misunderstanding towards Itachi comes from the fact that he is designed like he is 30 or 20-something by the time of the massacre. Pleople would empathize with him more if he looked like the child he was. In some flashbacks he looks and sounds more like Sasuke's father than his big brother. He is expected to act perfectly and to take the best decisions in all that involved Sasuke, as if he was the responsible grown-up in charge, and not just another child.
Yes, that's also a major reason. The first time he was introduced, he looked like a 16-17 year old to me, and in all the flashbacks he looks more or less the same. I don't relate to the sentiment of anyone hating him for this, though, or thinking he wasn't a child when it's been repeatedly told to us, but I guess usually it's not so for everyone.
I read somewhere that the reason he looks older than he is, is because of Sasuke's perception of him. Kishimoto draws him with more nuance, and he does look like a child in manga.
When, for the first time we see him as a child in Sasuke's flashbacks in manga, he looks like a 12 year old. He's very similar to how Sasuke would look without the marks on his face. Anime messed up giving him an adult voice and the similar appearance. Boruto does a better job at portraying him as a child in appearance and voice.
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And, yes! Itachi having to act like an adult could have been explored with his Boruto look and voice too. It would be much more tragic to watch him slowly lose his grip on his sanity when he looked like a baby he's meant to be.
Another reason for the lack of sympathy from a lot of people towards him is that his story is told to us through a series of unreliable narrators. Sasuke, for example, gives us two different versions of Itachi. The evil and the good one. The good one (in the flashbacks before the massacre) shows us he was a good and kind boy. Kishimoto uses Itachi as a plot device to further Sasuke's story. If some information regarding Itachi is important to establish Itachi as a character, but is not relevant to Sasuke's arc, it will not be discussed. Otherwise we'd have gotten some information on the time Sasuke trained under Orochimaru and his own guilt for pushing Sasuke into that path. I'm not saying you have to give us all in real time, but after his death, through Kisame (who'd be a better person to talk about Itachi to Sasuke) we could have gotten some more info on him. But nope.
Obito is also an unreliable narrator. As is Hiruzen. Sasuke tells us about Itachi, his brother. Obito tells us about the tragic figure/martyr Itachi, and Hiruzen tells us the perfect Shinobi Itachi was.
There's very little of real Itachi himself in all this.
Sasuke didn't know everything about his brother. Obito didn't either or it didn't matter to him enough to reveal more details about Itachi to Sasuke. Hiruzen also had his own guilt and lack of information on Itachi, therefore he only tells us what he knows and considers right about him.
Everyone is telling us about their version of Itachi that they know is right. Itachi is probably the only character whose story is told us like that. For other characters the narrators are very much reliable. Madara's story, for example, is told through Itachi, Obito, and Hashirama. And Hashirama is the most reliable narrator, so we can ignore what Itachi and Obito said about him. It isn't the case with Itachi. In his case we have to draw the conclusions based on all the information we've received from other people.
I don't agree with people who say he's inherently cruel or evil. (I wrote about it here) Unlike many others, if given a slightly better option he would have made better choice. Who else in the Narutoverse had to make the hard choices that Itachi did and he stood by them? People can stay mad with countless 'he could have/should have done this differently' but they're speaking from an outsider's POV who has the luxury of not having been through the trauma the character they're criticizing did. Everything they hate him for can be countered using manga penals. I know this is the bird-eye view of things, but these penals are self-explanatory.
Itachi is one character who did everything wrong, but with proper context that 'everything wrong' can be explained, understood, and to some extent, even justified. If people are going to remove, twist, distort, deny, or downright ignore that context to continue their hate, then I have a very bad news for them. More on this here.
It's why I tend to disagree with most of the discourse on Itachi. People dropping the context depending on their convenience to talk shit about him. And I applaud Kishimoto for creating Itachi. Imagine creating a minor character in a 700-chapter long manga and people being mad about his fanbase. He's a very popular character and some folks like to feel intellectually and morally superior for hating on popular things. They also like to think they're different and hence very special.
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retellingthehobbit · 4 months
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Your retelling, will it be implying a Thorin/Bilbo attraction?
I ask because I just discovered that ship and when I looked it up on tumblr, it led me to your work lolol
Every time someone asks me this I feel more like I'm making a Real Adaptation! I love the idea of people following this webcomic for years while analyzing the gay subtext as if they're waiting to see if Supernatural will make Destiel canon. a powerful feeling. The short answer is yes! The long answer is that it's complicated, and that if you're not a Bilbo/Thorin Person you should still stick around because I'm going to handle it in a very funky way that is not what you're expecting (also at the rate I draw, it won't be "canon" in the comic for approximately 2039482289798334534534534534 years.) Generally Thorin's role in my version of the story is that he's a living embodiment of The Quest, and Bilbo's feelings for Thorin mirror his feelings for the Adventure. When Thorin first arrives at Bag End, Bilbo is overwhelmed and annoyed and confused-- he finds him both fascinating and horribly frustrating at turns, and has no idea how to feel about Thorin in the same way he has no idea whether he'll join the adventure. As the story continues, Bilbo's feelings on the Quest will shift, and his feelings about Thorin will shift as well. I just really love the general idea of a new take on Thorin where he has a bit more pathos and a deeper relationship with Bilbo. I also think the way LOTR retroactively reframes The Hobbit as a story written by 'unreliable narrator Bilbo Baggins' adds to the possibilities a lot! there's a lot of queer subtext in Lord of the Rings, and it's fun to bring more of that subtext into the Hobbit. Tolkien often refers to hobbit adventures as "queerness,' and makes "queerness" the name for the thing that bigoted hobbits are afraid of; the fact that Bilbo has been repressing the "queer" part of himself that he inherited from his mother is, canonically, the thing he's struggling with in the beginning of the story.
I really enjoy the bit in the Unfinished Tales where Gandalf describes Bilbo like this:
And now I found that he was 'unattached' - to jump on again for of course I did not know all this until I went back to the Shire. I learned that he had never married. I thought that odd though I guessed why it was; and the reason that I guessed was not that most of the Hobbits gave me: that he had early been left very well off and his own master. No, I guessed that he wanted to remain 'unattached' for some reason deep down which he did not understand himself - or would not acknowledge, for it alarmed him.
That feeling of not being "out to yourself" and not knowing what it is that you want out of life is just!!! It's just very compelling to me.
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Thorin's still gonna die though. Don't you hate it when you have this whole elaborate coming-out-to-yourself story but then your first gay crush is so Problematic he kiiiinda nearly starts a war so you betray him by stealing the Heart of his Mountain in order to prevent that war, but then the war happens anyway and he dies horribly :/. A universal gay experience.
Thorin is also an interesting character to play with, especially because I'm diverging more from the book (compared to Bilbo or Gandalf.) The way I'm planning to handle him is that he's a character we see only "from the outside," from the perspective of other characters, and no character sees every side of him. The dwarves portray him as a noble king; the elves portray him as a haughty arrogant joke, to the point where it affects Tolkien's own "translation" of the story; Bilbo has his own complicated feelings about Thorin, but even his portrayal of Thorin is heavily biased and he never gets to see the full picture.
But yeah-- the Hobbit is originally a very lighthearted story, but I do think there are lot of darker and deeper emotions you could explore in it if you wanted to, particularly if you bring in the metatext of how it's reframed in Lord of the Rings. And I do want to explore those darker emotions! So I am XD. There already was an extremely book-accurate comic adaptation of the Hobbit that came out in the late nineties (though it's super short and the pages are cramped to fit in all the prose)-- so I don't really see the point of being obsessively close to the original novel, since an obsessively close comic adaptation already exists. This comic is for the Weird Queer Overly Emotional Metatextual Reframing of The Hobbit!! Anyway, it's fun.
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victimsofyaoipoll · 10 months
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Round 2
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Propaganda Under Cut
Pepper Potts
So many fics make her bitchy and controlling for absolutely no reason she deserves better
So for this we have to think back to like... peak Avengers MCU era. I am sorry. Back when Avengers had just come out it was BRUTAL out there for anyone who didn't like Tony/Steve (Tony Stark, Pepper's canon love interest, and Steve Rogers aka Iron Man and Captain America). While the ship itself is like, fine, it got sour so fast because Pepper was demonized SO much. When she wasn't completely sidelined and ignored, she was a cheater or an abuser (??) or what-have-you in fics so the two men could get together. It's much better now and last I heard Pepper gets some of the love she deserves (bc we do love women in this house!) but oh MAN it was bad back then. TBH all MCU women were treated like garbage by the fanbase but she got the brunt of it because she was in the way of The Most Popular Ship. She was just too #girlboss I guess
Frequently villainized for being a canon love interest for Tony Stark. Often portrayed as a Nag, constantly bothering him about doing "work" for his "company" when he could be working on inventions or spending time with his love interest! Sometimes she just Doesn't Understand Him, inconsiderately pressuring him to stay out of being a hero instead of being who he really is; only the m/m love interest really understands him! Or maybe she's the aggressor, who took advantage of the power imbalance between her and her poor innocent *checks notes* boss in order to pressure him into a relationship he didn't really want where he was treated terribly, and only his m/m love interest can save him from her! Pepper deserves better!
Sharon Carter
she “got in the way” of stucky shippers, in the comics she’s like the love of Steve’s life 
When she first appeared she was unfairly treated by fans for "getting in the way" of the Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes ship. A shame because she's a really good character. I'd talk more about how unfairly Sharon, and her actress Emily VanCamp, have been treated by the fanbase and the creators, but that's a different story.
She and Steve Rogers were meant to have a romantic relationship, but the entire fandom and many Stucky fans dislike her because it wasn’t a good ship. I think she isn’t the best but she doesn’t deserve so much hate
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cherry1sblog · 10 months
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PAIRING:Lee heeseung x fem!reader
GENRES:smut,fluff,bullying,alcohol,party,unprotected sex (rember to wrap your Willy so the out come won’t be silly🌝)
WARNINGS there is bullying in this heeseung is basically a dick to y/n and nothing in this story is real!!! This is fan fiction and the way I write about heeseung is not the way I portray him as he’s a person himself this is simply for entertainment only !!
SUMMARY:heeseung had always bullied you through your 3 years of Highschool but never let anyone touch you other then him and if he found out someone did that was the end of it you were basically marked as his toy that’s until the summer of your junior year you had enough you were done with him always making fun of you and you hated the fact that after all he did I to you you still adored him and liked him but it dosent matter cause you wanted to leave your senior year with a banger so you were no longer your nerdy self still smart asf obvi but appearance wise different you got contacts new clothes thank god you guys didn’t have a dress code and most importantly you spent all summer learning how to do your makeup……
(Word count :………)
//FIRST DAY OF SENIOR YEAR\\
You woke up that day at 4 in the morning all tho school didn’t start till 7:40 you had 3 hours to get ready for you first last day of senior year you showers blow dried your hair styled it put in your contacts and lastly did you makeup you were ready to go feeling a bit scared slightly pulling your skirt up more revealing more of your thighs but you didn’t care you were going to do this no matter what and no one can stop you not even Lee heeseung
Walking into school heads turning new faces old faces appearing but everyone seemed to stair at you looking some took out there phones and took photos asking if they knew who you were that upset you a little you went to this school for 3 years and people only saw yourself really only when you became “pretty” but still u were now super nervous now but your rember your main target Lee heeseung you clutched your purse and went straight to your classroom people Turing around seeing who entered you sat in a random seat next to a girl you’ve never seen she seemed super bubbly she was quiet a talker to “hello!!”you were shocked by her sudden loudness “oh…sorry…that must’ve been to loud “she lowers her voice you giggled “it’s okay why do you seem so excited tho”she turend to you with a big smile “well it’s my last year of Highschool and I get to meet new people so I’m really exited I Gusse “you just nodded an okay “oh I’m chu btw!” Ofc a cute girl with a cute name made sense “I’m y/n” you smiled at her “I’m guessing that this isn’t your first year “”nope I’ve gon sense freshman year here so I can tell you a lot about here if u want “she smiled brightly and hugged you you’ve never had a freind before so this was all knew “tysm!! Oh sorry is hugging now your thing”she looked at you but you didn’t know if the only freind you were sorta making would leave you if she found out but you trusted her “ah sorry I’m just not really used to having freinds or talking to people “she looked at you confused “your littlest drop dead gorgeous and no one can take there eyes off you” you giggled awkwardly “okay I’ll tell you I a secret up until my junior year I was a big nerd and I wanted a change so here’s the knew and improved me “you smiled happily until ofc someone had to walk in and ruin your fun lee heeseung
Your smile went down and chu noticed “what’s wrong y/n”he heard her say your name and wiped his head that way looking confused cause he didn’t notice you until chu said your name again “y/nnn can you hear me are you okay “ you let out a little cough rember not to break “yeah I’m okay sorry “and just as you were minding your busses heeseung came up to you “wow I really can believe it they park y/n dosent look like a nerd anymore “u just rolled your eyes at him “what do you want lee I’m not playing games with you anymore “he came close to your ear “just cause you changed dosent mean you aren’t my toy still isn’t that right doll”you didn’t know what to say he always caught your tongue “now go get me some snacks from the lunch room I’m hungry “he put 20 dollars on the desk expecting you to pick it up and run over there like always “no”you looked up at him and stood up took the money and threw it at him chu also seemingly upset “you know what heeseung if you want a stupid snack go get it your damn self “he seemed shocked a your response but started to smirk “right I’m sorry I wouldn’t want you running in that skirt you might wanna pull it down “chu getting ready to defend you but you didn’t need her to cause this is what you prepared for all summer “no I think it’s fine actually it’s ment to be like this but if you done being a dick you can go “everyone in the class stunned now not at the fact that you just told off they lee heeseung but at the fact that your the girl who used to do everyone’s homework that you were heeseung toy but just cause your not a nerd anymore dosent mean your not still off limits
//lunch time\\
By lunch time you already had 9 boys come to ask you for your insta and 12 girls ask what different makeup products you use or what you skin care was but those were the good things there were people saying you had gotten plastic surgery you did certain things just to get the money for your stuff people even said there was no way you were lee heeseungs little toy and if you wondering why they call you Lee heeseungs toy it’s cause he could pick at every part of you body and you did what he wanted he could slap you pull your hair push you and you still always did what he wanted you to do but he had made it every clear that you were only his to fuck with and no one eleses
You had saten down with chu to eat lunch her happily taking a bite of food made you happy you finally had a friend well let’s say a couple freinds you had met this boy really shy but nice named soobin and another boy who was more outgoing beomgyu they were also new and just transferred so your guises group was prefect but anyways you all were sitting down and enjoyed your food you were happy for once out of your Highschool life you finally had people you could go to the mall with have sleepovers go to party’s with but ofc like always you were knocked out of you thoughts by yet again heeseung he had just pushed a kid to the floor for getting him the wrong dumplings him jake and sunghoon walking away from the boy they had just scared heeseung walked passed you but Sunghoon said something and walked back to where you were “hey y/n” you looked up seeing as Sunghoon and Jake never really participated in heeseungs stupidness but they did have there fare share of “fun “with it “hey sunghoon”you said coldly”huh “he stuck his tongue threw his cheek “it really is you then HOWD you get so much hotter over summer I mean you were a cute girl but now your really js something eles “as he was about to start going closer heeseung pushed him away not to hard but just enough to make him stumble “what the hell do you think your doing “ “not like your ever gonna do anything plus she wouldn’t dare you even if you wanted we all know she’s your toy but she can speak for herself “ you saw heeseung clenching his fist but it made you angry how he thought he could control you “I told you everyone knows y/n is off limits “ “off limits to bully I’m not bullying her I’m simpling asking if she wants to go out sometime “ as heeseung was about to open his mouth you answerd “y-yes “they both looked stunned beomgyu soobin and chu having there mouths open wide “I would like to go out with you sometime “ “doll chose very wisely here “ “you don’t get to control me heeseung I’m done with your bull shit you can’t just walk all over me agian “ heeseung Just loooked at you with an expression you couldn’t understand “you heard her anyways y/n uh I’ll pick you up Saturday and 4:30 “you nodded your head smiling heesung had stormed off at that point.
//the next day\\
“Y/NN THERE YOU ARE “chu comes rushing to you sitting pulling out the chair and sitting in it she seemed to exited “yk chu sometimes I wonder if you on something “she just laughs “we’re not talking about that rn LOOK THO” she hands you her phone and it was a party ofc the boys were having as a welcome back to school like they did every year but you had never gone but this year you were definitely going no matter what even if you had to sneak out “holy shit the back to school party “”yeah it’s gonna be at jakes house tonight so we better go shopping after school “you both looked at eachother cause obviously you guys had no idea what to wear to a back to school party
//at the mall\\
“Ughhhhh y/n we’ve been to three dress shops already and you’ve liked non of them “she said dragging her feet with bags in her hands “look chu my dress it has to be different then something I would normally wear if I was the old me remember we’re gonna go out with a banger and If I were you I would go return the dress cause this dress shop is they best”as soon as you guys step into the dress shop chus mouth drops and gose to pick up a dress “Y/N YOU WERE SO RIGHT OMG “ you start to look for dresses to seeing witch one you like it came down to three dresses a white one simple and short but cute a blue one the had sparkles and a slimy black one with a diamond straps as soon as you came out in the blue one chu loved it it fit your body perfectly glitter on is and everything you would be shining with the lights they would have and you knew this was gonna be the one you got some simple black heels to for the dress witch you loved as you guys were leaving the store ofc you had to see heeseung and 6 of his guy freinds you were fucked “yooo hold up “Jake stops you and everyone is looking at you and chu”see what I tell you heeseung it was her and uh what’s your name”he looks at chu confused “o-oh I’m chu”he looked at her up and down “cute” your a bit nervous cause everyone still had there eyes on you normally you would just hide away but no you weren’t going to go down “my god can you fucking pervs look at something eles “heeseung grabed your had and took you into a hallway where others weren’t at “h-HEY let go of me “he released your arm and put u up agains the wall making you a bit flustered “doll see your starting to piss me off just cause you where this stupid shit only makes you look like a slut and you going out with Sunghoon lemme just tell you this if you wake up the next day and he’s gone don’t ever expect to hear from him again and this big mouth of yours needs to learn how to shut the fuck up “he let you go as you feel to the floor being in this position triggered something and you remembered
-flash back-
The three girls you were so afraid of had gotten done beating you leaving you on the rooftop heeseung had come out of the corner he was watching everything happen in coming up to you you looked up at him and your eyes got watery he grabed your face and looked at you “don’t cry it only makes you look pathetic”and he let go of your face and walked away later that day you found a bandage on you desk but didn’t know who put it there
-end of flash back-
“OMG Y/n”chu ran up to you finding you on the floor holding your chest “are you okay what happend did he hurt you are you crying “”I’m im fine chu ty “she helped you up and you guys left the mall you didn’t have time to cry and be sad you were going to this party no matter what like you said
//arriving at party\\
Soobin had picked you guys up all four of you guys going to the party as u guys got off people do what they do gossiping like there’s no tmrw anyways you walk thru the door being greeted by Sunoo even tho he was friends with the boys he wasn’t a complete jack ass “omg so glad you guys could make it” hugging u and chu and giving the boys a side hug “well um if u guys want drinks there in the kitchen and yeah pretty much just enjoy but go greet the boys if u want “ u guys nodded beomgyu chu and soobin going to say hi to there friends as you went alone to go get a drink “hey you guys want a drink “they all nodded saying a beer was good u walked into the kitchen seeing people make out drinking laughing and partying as this was your first party you didn’t imagine it to be exactly like the tv Highschool shows but hey you couldn’t complain walking up to the alcohol section seeing jay and sunghoon he waved at you as u came up to him “damn y/n you look amazing “Sunghoon said “thank you I didn’t exactly know if this was a good fit but now that I know you like it I’m guessing it was “sunghoon and jay scanning you from top to bottom “so uh y/n you want a drink “jay had asked “yeah just give me four beers “he nodded sunghoon pulling you by your waist and bending down to your ear a little “hey I just wanted to make sure you were okay yk after what happened”you felt an Aw because he actually cared you wispers back into his ear “yeah I’m fine I wasn’t gonne let him get to me “he smirked looking at you and gave u a kiss witch you were not prepared for but ofc someone was watching you the entire time and pushed him off you “what the fuck sunghoon”you could tell heeseung was mad but why what reasons did he have to be upset “oh hey heeseung”sunghoon smirked at him like as if he knew he wasn’t supposed to be doing what he just did “don’t fucking hey heeseung me what the fuck do you think your doing “ “I mean I thought it was pretty clear I was kissing her “hey you guys cmon don’t fight “jay stood beetween the boys “yeah cmon heeseung don’t sweat it we’re just having some fun “ those words hurt you you thought sunghoon liked you or were you really just there for his entertainment now?
You put your head down a bit upset and you saw heeseung smirking “what’s wrong doll I told you aren’t I right “ you were annoyed at heeseung at the fact he was right again but you felt embarrassed “shut the fuck up heeseung “ “dont be mad doll you guys were just having fun right “ in that moment it clicked to sunghoon the way he had said it and he felt bad “wait y/n that’s not how I mean it” u we’re gonna take this as your opportunity to get back at heeseung “you smiled at Sunghoon going up to him whispering in his ear leaving heeseung and jay curious “don’t worry I know we’re having fun but heeseung just ruined it so can you take me where we can have fun” you left sunghoon speechless the girl who always had to run errands for his bsf and who would always get picked on was now so bold and a bit flustered “u-uh yeah sure “ he grabed your arm guiding you to what you assumed was jakes guest room but as you looked back you could see a very annoyed heeseung
//15 min after entering the room\\
As you and sunghoon were making out his shirt already off and your dress guliding up to your hips sunghoon s hands placed on your thighs massaging them you were nervous but just as he was about to go under you stopped him “hoon wait um it’s my first time so I’m kinda scared”he just smiled at you “hey we don’t have to do it if you don’t want we can take things slow” maybe heeseung was wrong maybe he really did like you and you were gonna shove it in his face that you and his bsf were gonna be together “well do u js wanna watch a movie and cuddle” by this time you were ready to sleep so u agreed “yeah but um do you know if Jake has any clothes to borrow or I could js sleep in this I don’t wanna bother” he got you and went to a drawer in the room “scince we stay at jakes a lot we basically all have are own room heres my shirt “ he throws you a plain white tee but no pants so you look confused at him a bit “oh did you want like shorts or somthing sorry” he was about to go back but you stopped him “no like this is fine I actually prefer to sleep like this “ he just nodded and he went to change into something more comfortable but you didn’t expect him to come back with no shirt so you gasped seeing his pretty toned body “what?” He asks you just blush and shake your head as he smirks the rest of the night was fun but you fell asleep that night not thinking anything of it
//the next morning \\
Your eyes fluttered as you heard a knock on the door and seeing Jake come in the room made you panic and in that moment you wanted to die sunghoon still sleep until “YO WHAT THE FUCK SUNGHOON” and in that moment sunghoon woke up “nah dude I feel so betrayed you promised to help me clean but instead you got to fuck y/n “ and cause ofc everyone had heard jake yell Niki sunoo and heeseung came to the room and your eyes met heeseungs and you could see clearly he was upset “ Jake we didn’t fuck she just slept over “ “yk that’s hard to BELIEVE when she’s wearing your shirt and you have no shirt “ Jake had a point but it was the truth you guys really had not done anything “actually it wouldn’t be hard to believe sense y/n s a slut” you got up from the bed and threw the pillow at heeseung “you know heeseung just cause your a fucking whore dosent mean I am and I just borrowed his clothes you idiot so fuck off “ scince you had no shorts and just a shirt the boys just looked at you niki and sunoo deciding it was better to leave but heeseung was about to say something but sunghoon had cut him off “ hyung can you please just let this go “ and with that sunghoon just closed the door on them and locked it and in that moment you both realized you had school “ughhh we have school “ “we can always skip “ you quickly refused never once missing a day not wanting to hurt your perfect attendance “ cmon y/n don’t be such a nerd or are you still the old y/n?” You knew he was only saying that to persuade you but it did work “ I mean n-no I just um wouldn’t know what we would do “ sunghoon just shook his head at you “ we could just chill go to the mall do anything are you really that boring ?” Offended at his hitting him on his bicep “let’s just chill then “
//after schoo\\
After school normally the boys would all go to jakes house tk study play games shit like that witch they all did thinking that y/n would be gone by then but they were very wrong when they see y/n and sunghoon on the couch asleep “holy shit heeseung hyung is not gonna be happy” jungwon picked you up and ran with you on his back you being confused when jungwon locked his door and threw you on the bed “WHAT TH-“ jungwon covers your mouth muffling your yelling until you stoped “shut the fuck up unless you want to make heeseung hyung and sunghoon hyung hate eachother more right now “ honestly you couldn’t give a fuck less and if this made heeseung miserable then you had every reason not to care “ why should I care on fact I actually don’t mind going back ou-“ jungwon grabed your hand pinning you on the wall wtf is it with everyone pinning you on the wall “ look I know heeseung hyung did fucked up shit and I know it’s fucked up we didn’t do anything but we all grow from our mistakes and plus now your like hot so please just shut the fuck up and well stay in here”.
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Okay well I’m im just gonna leave this here I feel like I had y’all eating for too long I honestly thought I would be done with this by now but I went on a family vacation recently so I had no time but I’ll try to make the next part as quick as possible ty all sm for being patient
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aihoshiino · 4 months
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chapter 139 thoughts
Because of the content of this chapter I will unavoidably have to discuss CSA and topics related to it, including grooming, emotional abuse and sexual assault. I do not discuss them in great detail, but if you very understandably just aren't in the headspace for that, no hard feelings - look after yourself and I'll see you next time.
Gonna say up top that my review of this chapter is probably gonna read more negative than it necessarily is, because I do not think this was an Actively Bad chapter. It was, however, a deeply frustrating one and it's because of a lot of small things piling up that are starting to really grind my gears.
ai eating sweets with that head empty expression again makes this a tenouttaten chapter regardless of anything else i say here btw
As was foreshadowed by Kamiki's appearance last week, this time we're finally diving into some of the details around how Kamiki and Ai met. I'm a little surprise by how… I guess, unceremonious it is? This is the catalyst for the entire rest of the story, after all. It's the first meeting between the twins' parents and the first time Ai comes face to face with the man who will eventually kill her. Even given to us secondhand, this should be a pretty weighty, dramatic moment but…
there's no diplomatic way to say this so I will say this the undiplomatic way: I really kind of fucking hate that a moment this meaningful was undermined by flaccid incest bait jokes again lmao. I absolutely loathe that any kind of complexity the mutual past life reveal could have introduced to the twins' dynamic and any potential exploration of Ruby's feelings on the matter has been completely tossed by the wayside in favor of just having her splooge about her oniichan every time they're together. I've said before and I'll say again: I think the idea of Ruby developing confusedly romantic feelings for Aqua in the wake of realizing he was Gorou is a deeply compelling one and I would be on board with Oshi no Ko exploring that dynamic if it was actually going to explore it. The way Oshi no Ko leans into and explores the discomfort and dysphoria caused by the friction between the twins' past lives and their current selves is incredibly compelling when we actually get it and it's so baffling to me that one of the biggest, most braindead opportunities to continue doing this has not been snatched up.
We are approaching 20 chapters worth of time, in and out of universe, since this reveal happened and almost nothing has come of it. The most exploration we've gotten of how this changes things is in Mengo's interlude chapter for the twins which just feels all the more jarring in hindsight when the main story has been so stuck on using it for this incredibly tired and worn out incest bait comedy. Like, come on, man. It's 2024. What are we even doing here.
Bitching aside for the time being, I did really like the little scene between Taiki & Aqua, though. Both of them are dealing with some deeply heavy material and portraying real people they themselves both have a lot of baggage with so I appreciate they're given a moment to breathe and get those feelings out. Though again, we are given frustratingly little insight into whatever is going on with Aqua's head right now and given just how much weight and focus was given to Ruby coming to understand Ai and get into the right headspace to act as her, it feels really jarring and conspicuous that we have absolutely no idea how he's done the same for Kamiki.
H O W E V E R. I think this scene does contain a fascinating and potentially huge reveal that can easily be missed if you let yourself be distracted by Ruby; Kamiki, at least as portrayed by Aqua at this point in time, has white stars in his eyes. While I don't subscribe to the idea of In Depth Hoshigan Colour Decoding that's common elsewhere in the fandom, this does undeniably put middle school Kamiki in a closer emotional headspace to Ai than his present day self. Given what we see of the black hoshigan in other characters and knowing that this is Kamiki in the thick of his abuse at Airi's hands, this implies that despite all the horror he's been subjected to thus far this is still a Kamiki who has some light left in him. In fact, everything about Aqua's portrayal of him here suggests a certain sense of kindness and innocence that has yet to be ripped away from him which is very, very interesting. This is, after all, a hateful work written to kill Aqua's father. So this disarmingly likable and sympathetic portrayal of him as an undeniable victim throws a lot about the movie's intentions into question
what i'm saying is even aqua is furthering the kamiki hikaru babygirlification agenda. so true, king.
That said, this scene also comes with its own nits to pick, which is the reveal - or I guess. the confirmation - that Ruby does in fact know who her father is. While we don't know exactly what and how much she knows, I think it's reasonable to conclude that she's been brought on board with at least everything about him the movie confirms. And like… man… wouldn't it be really great to have seen Ruby learn any of that information on screen? Wouldn't it have been really interesting to see Ruby learn literally any fucking information about this revenge quest and the man who murdered her beloved mother and to have to work out how to process all that? Wouldn't it have made a kickass arc for Ruby to learn that even the man she despised for killing her mother was himself a victim of the entertainment industry, to see the damage that can be caused by a relationship between an adult and a child when she herself was innocently fantasizing about a similarly huge age gap between her and Gorou and to perhaps go through some conflict and internal growth based on all this?
but no. splooging over her brother is a much more important use of page time. i guess.
speaking of airi. the image of her carrying around the baby she conceived by raping eleven year old boy, right in front of him at the place she is continuing to abuse him is so incredibly foul and rancid i kind of want to throw up about it. on god i hope hell's hot enough.
It's pretty short, but the montage of Ai and Hikaru spending time together and him gradually softening and opening up to her a little more was really sweet. I've been super interested in the HikaAi relationship ever since we learned who Hikaru even was so even these little tidbits filtered through 15YL's portrayal are really exciting to get. It also lends some credence to something I've been theorizing about why Ai specifically wanted to be with Hikaru - she seems to understand and relate to his experiences with objectification at the hands of the adults and people around him and to feel some sense of solidarity with him as a result. In terms of theming, I always expected the HKAI relationship to contain echoes of AquKana and AquAka - Hikaru is a dark mirror to Aqua, so it makes sense that his relationships would be so as well - and in this sense, I think we can see an echo of the AquAka romance there. In Hikaru, Ai begins to believe she can find a person who can understand and accept her. … or that's my theory as of now, anyway.
And that final scene between Airi and Hikaru… whoof. Genuinely blood curdling. In general, the reveal of just how long Hikari was being actively abused by Airi made my stomach churn - for some reason, it had never occurred to me that it might have run parallel to his meeting with Ai but the idea that this wasn't just a one-off incident, but active grooming and abuse that Airi got away with thanks to her position of power and authority over this child in her care for years… genuinely revolting and I do mean that in the best possible way.
CSA is such a heavy topic and quite frankly, anime and manga are not historically delicate or tasteful in its portrayal - especially when it comes to male victims of assault. Ever since we were told what had happened to Hikaru, I was really on the fence about whether this was something OnK could tackle in the way it needed to be. So far, though, I think its portrayal and indictment of Airi's abuse is excellent. It is not allowed to be a spectacle, and we are shown just enough to understand the nauseating scope of the horror Hikaru has been subjected to. I'm hoping Aka and Mengo are able to keep this up.
No break next week! Maybe one after next chapter, though? 140 will be the final chapter of volume 14 and I'm curious to see what note it's going to end on.
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snwycde · 5 months
Text
Connected (Bang Chan) part 4
Pairing: BangChan x fem reader
wc: 2.3k
warnings‼️: smut‼️, minors do not interact‼️‼️*warning placed before scene*
summary: slow burn of Chan and fem reader. Chan runs into his past, how will it affect the present and his future?
This is part 3!!!
part 1
part 2
part 3
-----
“Where have you been?” Hyunjin is sitting on the kitchen island eating snacks, “It’s 11pm on a Monday. And Han and Changbin got home like 4 hours ago.”
“I was working.” Chan taking off his shoes, throwing them to the side.
“They said you left before them.” Hyunjin takes a bite of his apple, “So where were you actually?”
Chan takes off his jacket, placing it on the chair beside Hyunjin, “Why are you acting like a mom Hyun?” He opens the refrigerator to grab some leftovers.
“You went to see her, didn't you?” Hyunjin takes another bite, looking at Chan who freezes in his spot, “By your reaction, I’m taking that as a yes.”
Chan scratches his head and sits down “Look Hyunjin, this isn’t some romance story. I just went to see her, that's all.” He’s about to take a bite of his food before, “Wait, how did you know?”
Hyunjin leans back into his chair, “Felix and I were betting on it. Ever since you last saw her you look even more out of it.”
Chan shrugs and takes a bite of his food.
“So what did you do? Did you take her on a date? Surprise her at work with flowers?” Hyunjin finishes up his apple, “I wanna see what she looks like again. The girl who swooned Chan hyung.”
“I think she hates me.” Chan stares at his food, “Y/n, that’s her name. I think she hates me…and I kind of deserve it.”
This makes Hyunjin slowly sit back up, looking at his hyung, “Why would she hate you?” Genuinely curious at who could hate his hyung who’s nothing but kind.
“I treated her really badly.” Chan says before taking another bite, “I treated her so badly and pretended nothing was wrong. I pretended she didn’t exist.”
Hyunjin knew there was more to the story, but hearing this made his hopeless romantic heart ache. He wanted to know more, but he didn’t know where to start. And he especially didn’t want to pry. 
“Yeah, you did.” 
Hyunjin and Chan turn to look up at Minho leaning on the counter.
“Eavesdropping much.” Chan shakes his head, “I mean you’re not wrong but when did you even get here.”
“Felix is being too loud on his video games and I needed water.” Minho pours some water into a cup, then heads over to the table they were sitting at, “Don’t mind if I come and join this little therapy session for Channie, huh?”
Chan lightly laughs, “What are you gonna do rat me out to Hyunjin-ah? He loves me too much to think of me badly.”
Chan’s remark makes Hyunjin’s head tilt, “Okay well now I want to know, because I feel left out now. Who else knows besides Han and Lino hyung?”
“Just them two, and my family.” Chan continues eating his food.
“So am I allowed to ask questions or…” Hyunjin throws his apple away into the trash.
“Shoot.” Chan makes a gun with his fingers, inferring to go ahead.
“Who is she? How’d you meet? How long did you date?”
“I thought you were gonna ask about the breakup. Not the whole plot story.” Minho laughs. But the face of Hyunjin tells Minho and Chan that he really wanted to know.
Chan clears his throat, “Um well her name is Y/n L/n. I met her at this cafe her parents own, she was the first friend I made when I moved to Korea. I started dating her 3 years after I met her…we’re the same age…so when we were like 16…? I think we started dating in 2014.”
“That’s actually so cute. First love.”
“That’s so young. Young love.”
Minho and Hyunjin speak at the same time (I’ll let you guess who said what). They look at eachother rolling their eyes. Chan continues eating, looking unbothered.
“So why did you break up with her?” Hyunjin asks next.
“Chan hyung, didn’t break up with her. She broke up with him.” Minho reaches and takes some of the snacks in the middle.
“What? Really??” Hyunjin holds his mouth in shock, “So why do you portray yourself as a bad guy if she’s the one that broke your heart.”
“Um… maybe because I broke hers first.” Chan finishes his food and starts to get up, “I think that’s enough storytelling for tonight, it’s almost 12 and we have a pretty busy day tomorrow.”
“You can’t leave me with only that. That’s basically nothing! You’re leaving me on a cliffhanger!” Hyunjin pouts.
Chan waves his hand walking out of the kitchen, “Ask me another time.”
“Lino hyung, what did Chan hyung do?” Chan hears Hyunjin ask Minho before he enters his room.
---
“Jihyoooooooo, I hate him so much.” Here you are in your room, with Jihyo, who brought soju with food after she came home from work. You fall from where you stood, laying on the couch where Jihyo watched you, “I don’t hate him. I just…he’s so mean to me.”
“I can’t believe you got into the car with him. Actually I can’t believe you went to Jaebum when he’s at a bar drunk calling you. Like girl. What the hell.”
“I just wanted to make sure he didn’t get hurt or something. And he was alone –”
“Babe, do you not understand what no contact is?” Jihyo plays with your hair while you place your head onto her lap, “You barely even liked Jaebum. Like look at you, you're here whining over Chan, more than him. You’re a mess.”
“I didn’t know I’d see Chan at such a vulnerable moment. I literally was answering his stupid questions so mindlessly, when he doesn’t even deserve to know anything.” you pull a blanket over you while rambling, “Ugh, Jihyo if only you heard how he spoke to me like…like I was nothing. As if I was just a friend or worse, a stranger. It felt like how it was on the day after Christmas.”
Jihyo didn’t need her to explain what she meant, she knew what she was talking about. That day, after Christmas, is why Jihyo holds no resentment or empathy for Chan. She doesn’t care about how many times you tried to defend him, or brush it off that it was okay and it didn’t hurt you. Because Jihyo knew it hurt you, and once you’ve had too much to drink, if Chan was mentioned or something that reminded you of him, you break down pouring your heart and soul into every single word.
“I remember because I was there, Y/n.” She takes the soju from your hand, “that’s enough for tonight.”
Jihyo walks you to your bed before saying bye for the night. 
--- *MDNI* smut below‼️‼️‼️‼️
His hands roam against your body, touching it as if it’s his last. He follows you as you crawl backwards onto his bed, chasing your lips as if it's the sweetest thing he’s ever tasted. He softly pushes you onto your back as he cages you in, allowing you to trail your fingers up his arms to his shoulders, wrapping your arms around his neck - pulling him closer. The action causes his lower half to brush against yours, a moan spilling into his mouth. 
Hearing you, makes his mind grow darker, craving you more. He starts pressing into you, attacking your neck, “Taste so good.” You run your hands through his hair and give a light tug, just how he likes it, you pull him off your neck, making him whine at the loss of you. You tug at his shirt, “Off, please.”
He smirks at this, placing a kiss on your forehead, “only because you asked so nicely.” You watch him, knees on either side of you, kneeling as he unbuttons his dress shirt in front of you. He sees you bite your lip, “Like what you see?” You turn your head away from him, suddenly shy. 
“No, no, baby.” he softly takes you by the chin, turning your face towards him, “Watch me. Don’t take your eyes off me.” He takes off his shirt and your hands rush to place them on his chest. “Needy aren’t you,” he jokes before taking one of your hands and kissing it, then trailing kisses down back to your neck. He finds your sweet spot, making you bite your lip, to hide your moan.
“Don’t.” his hand comes up to your face, brushing his thumb against your lips. “I want to hear everything.” he whispers into your ear, as he dips two of his fingers into your mouth. You start tasting him, moaning around his fingers. 
“Baby, please.” You whine out as you feel him grind himself onto you, “Want more. Want you.”
“You’re so cute, always asking so politely.” His lips reattach to yours as his fingers find the bottom of your dress - the reason why you’re both in this situation now. He starts to take it off of you, disconnecting his lips just so you can throw it over your head, then he quickly reattaches to you. “God, you’re so perfect.” He says while undoing your bra with practiced movements, “It makes me just want to ruin you.”
You moan at his words, your hand trails to his pants to make him slide them off. As he kicks off his pants, you play with the hem of his boxers, hearing his breath get heavier as he kisses you more desperately. “Are you needy baby?” It’s your turn to tease.
“Stop teasing.” He plays with the thin lace on your hips, returning the favor.
“Me tease?” You immediately grab his dick and give it a squeeze, making his head fall to yours, breath hitches, continuing your movements, “I’d never tease my baby.” Your thumb runs over his tip that’s starting to leak, “So needy, baby.” He moans loudly before placing his hand on your clit, slowly moving at the pace you're stroking him. Your eyelids flutter shut, overwhelmed with the pleasure.
“So weak,” He teases.
Your eyes open as you speed up your movements, feeling chan twitch at the sudden change in pace. You quickly reach into his boxers and take him into your hand, and pump him. 
“Fuck.” He says as you spit into your hand just to reach back down. He hasn’t moved his hands too focused on not finishing. 
“Who’s weak baby?” You use this moment to push him against the headboard, crawling onto him as he sits looking at you. You look at him as you drip your spit from your mouth to his dick lathering it around him making him look up moaning. You stop your movements, your other hand takes his chin, “nuh uh baby, eyes on me.”
You continue your movements and start kissing him intensely. He’s moaning into your mouth and by the grip on your hips, you know he’s close. You usually take the pillow princess role, but by the way he’s been so stressed, you decide to take care of him really quick. You know he’ll make it up to you later.
He pulls away from your lips, “Close.”
You smile at this, “So cute.”
He’s so fast that you’re unsure of what even happened. He pushes you onto your back roughly taking off your panties, “I need to finish in you.” It sounds like a demand, but you know that this is his way of asking for your consent. You open your legs wider and he takes it as a sign to continue. He fully takes off his boxers and lines himself up with you, “You’re so wet.”
“Put it in please, don’t tease,” You whine.
“Not fair when you’ve been teasing me all night.”
“I want you to come in me, baby.” you wrap your legs around his waist pulling him closer, “Fuck me.”
His eyes darken wasting no time, he pushes into you, moaning as he feels you swallow him whole, “Fuck, I missed you so much. ”
He lets you adjust for a second until you push him closer, “Move.”
He starts thrusting deeper into you before pulling out to the tip. Roughly pushing all the way in, he does this slowly yet hard, making both of you moan out loudly gripping onto each other. 
“Faster.” One word is all you say and he’s quick to listen, thrusting faster with less force yet still deep enough to hit your spot. 
“I’m gonna come,” you cry out, it feels so good. He feels so good. Your hands entangle with his hair moving to his back, unable to stay still. So high off of him you don't know where to put your hands. You just want to show him - no, you want to let him feel how good he's making you feel.
“Come on baby, show me how good I make you feel.” He keeps the same strong pace just how you like it, “Let me feel you dripping around me.” And that is what tips you over, you release around him, scratching so hard on his back that it’ll sure leave marks. Screams caught from your throat, as he grips your throat just how you like it.
“Come inside me baby please.” You urge him on, still experiencing your high, you're so drunk on pleasure you don’t know what you’re saying, “Please give it to me. Put it in me deep. I-I need your come.”
He’s now fucking you harder chasing his own release, he grabs your face kissing you. 
“Come in me, Chan.” You moan as you look into his eyes.
You saying his name and the eye contact does it for him, and he's grabbing onto you so tightly as he yells out, “Fuck y/n. I-I’m coming.”
Both of you moaning as you feel his fluid leak into you, filling you up with his warm seed. He still continues moving as he attaches his lips onto you. You kiss each other until you fall asleep with him in you, holding you close.
---
You open your eyes, Chan’s not there. You sit up, looking down. 
Chan opens his eyes, Y/n’s not there. Chan sits up, looking down.
“Oh.” 
“Oh.”
author's note: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
this is my first time writing a smut idk whether i hate it or not 😭
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larluce · 5 months
Text
I want to talk about Arthur's reaction to Merlin being a sorcerer in magic reveal fics.
There are the ones that portray a very violent and cruel Arthur. Fisically injuring Merlin on impulse or trying to supress his magic with cold iron. Almost killing him by accident due to outburst or ignorance for him to feel very guilty afterwards. I get why they do it. The angst and drama. And, while there are very well written fics with these prompts, I don't actually believe Arthur would react that way. No matter how betrayed, angry and hurt he feels.
True, there were occasions where Arthur reacted badly, or really, just two occasions: when Morgause told him the truth about his birth and he almost killed his father, and when Gwen "cheated" on him with Lancelot and banish her. However, in the first scenario he genuinely believed his father had killed his mother just out of selfishness, the mother he never got to meet and blame himself for her death all his life, and then killed thousands, not really out of guilt or revenge which probably was Uther main motive, but out of pure hypocrisy. Honestly, even the most kindhearted and nonviolent person would react that badly! I don't think we can compare learning your best friend lied to you about being a sorcerer for years with that. When it came to Gwen though Arthur was actually merciful. As King he should have had her executed, he couldn't NOT punish her in some way because there were witnesses and he couldn't be look as a weak or unreasonable King. And even as angry as he was, he let her explain herself, he was willing to listen to what she had to say. Looking a little backwards, when Arthur found Gwen kissing Lancelot and went on full rage, he never draw his sword at her and is actually when she put herself between Lancelot and his blade that he stops. The woman he loved betrayed him, made him look like a fool infront an entire council and probably the entire kingdom as well and yet he never once insulted her. The much he did, besides banish her of course, was shaking her by the arms in his anger but it's short lived and he quickly apologised after that, because even after what Gwen did to him he can't bare the though of hurting her.
Then there are the fics were Arthur reacts too nicely to the news. He is understanding, he doesn't even get mad at all. He is fine with Merlin being a sorcerer right away. While these fics tend to be cute and all fluff, they make less sense to me that the first ones I mentioned. Arthur still was raised to hate magic, that doesn't go away just in a minute. Also while he can be a very reasonable man, he is a very resentful one too, at least when it comes to trust. We've seen this through the series, nothing breaks his heart more than someone he cares for betraying his trust. Returning to the previous example, while he let go Gwen unharmed after the infidelity, it took him a long time to actually forgive her. Also, while not being a violent man normally, Arthur can be very hurtful with words when he's upset. He threathened Merlin with banishment when he was still hurt about Gwen and Merlin kept reminding him about her. When Merlin decided not to go with him to the most important battle in his life, he said his famous "I always though you were the bravest man I ever met... I guess I was wrong". He didn't actually mean the words, but he's hurt so he hurts others to appease the pain. Was he being unfair and selfish when he said these things? Yes, he's not perfect, he has flaws but that makes him human.
So, how do I actually believe Arthur would react if he had found out about Merlin's magic before Canmlan? Not so different really. He would have said hurtful things, would demand to be alone, for Merlin to leave (not banishment), but he wouldn't fisically injure Merlin in any way. He also wouldn't arrest him at least there were other witnesses and he had to keep appearences, because he's still king of a kingdom that bans magic. But even then he would late let Merlin explain himself and make sure he has a fair trial, a trial Arthur would definitely arrange in a way Merlin is found innocent, or he would give him a royal pardon, and he would make sure Merlin is not harm while he's in the dungeons. Banishment would be a last resort if the council is firm about Merlin being punish, because laws and mentalities can't be changed in a day after all.
But if there're not other witnesses, Arthur would simply not require his servicies for a while, ignore him for some days, weeks maybe, but not a long time really. Again, he can be a resentful person, but not an unreasonable one, he would eventually call for Merlin and be willing to listen to him. The intesity of his anger and hurt, and how troubled he feels about his believes on magic, would depend on which season the magic reveal happens. But, generally, the actions he would take would be the same. Let's remember that even when he found out about Merlin's magic in Camnlan, after all the betrayals he suffered, when Merlin left him alone with Gaius, he ordered Gaius, not for Merlin to be arrested or to disclose to someone Merlin was a sorcerer, but to have Merlin take a word to Gwen! To his wife! If he really believed Merlin was evil, that he could hurt him, he wouldn't dare to do that. Also, as soon as he learned he needed Merlin to have a chance of survival, he accepted his help, reluctantly yes, but he did let him take him to the sidhe when he could easly refuse and demand Gaius to do it or refuse to do it all together cause going to the sidhe would mean using magic on himself and put faith in a sorcerer. So, no, I don't believe he ever planed on taking Merlin to the dungeons, much less kill him, even then. He just wanted to be left alone for a moment, he needed Merlin to leave because it hurt to see him after the revelation, after the betrayal.
Anyways, those are my thoughts. What do you think?
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