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farfromstrange · 1 year

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heyyy can you do Matt Murdock Smut where him and brat!reader are in a heated argument and the reader is short and small, is feisty and takes no shit.

During the argument he says

“watch who the fuck you’re speaking to, I am not one these idiots who take shit from you”

and the reader is like

“I’m not watching it, no prescription with it, even blind at this point…. what are you going to do about it?”

Matt responds

“im going to put you in your place”.

The reader responds

“you can put me in my place, might a fact since you think you’re supposed to scare me and intimidate somebody I have a solution for that”

So the reader drags a chair to hover over him. Both a face to face banter and Matt laughs at her.

During this smut he is teasing the reader saying

“why did you go quiet? Aint so talkative now hotshot?”

Matt degrades her and calls her little girl and is pounding into her until she admits she will stop being a brat and obey Matt.

Please and Thank You!

Hi! Thank you so much for your request (and I am terribly sorry for the long wait). I started this a few days ago but I couldn't find a proper end. I adapted pieces of the dialogue so they would fit, but I used what you told me to, so I hope you like it!

Feisty | Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Masterlist

Summary: You and Matt get into an argument and he decides it's time to put you in your place again and remind you who you belong to.

Warning: SMUT, 18+ MINORS DNI, PWP, established relationship, Dom!Matt, Brat!Reader, cussing, strong language, teasing, degrading, praise kink, vaginal fingering, mentions of oral (f!receiving), rough sex, unprotected p in v, hair pulling, choking, slight breeding kink (?), marking kink, use of "good girl", semi-public sex (office sex), orgasm denial, fluff in the end

Word Count: 3.2k

A/n: This is some filthy shit. The other requests are coming, by the way. I'm just trying to find ways to continue them. My inbox is still open for your thoughts and requests, but keep in mind that it might take some time for me to finish them. I also always have an open ear for anything else you guys feel like sharing. Enjoy! (and thank you for the request, lovely!)

18+ under the cut!

Sometimes, Matt makes you livid. Like, beyond compare, makes-you-clench-your-fists-and-want-to-punch-a-wall livid. He can be the sweetest and most caring partner, but there often comes a time when you want to scratch his eyes out. Today is one of those days.

You’re not sure what prompted this argument you find yourself in, but it was bound to escalate from the second you muttered a silent, “Fuck you!” Under your breath.

Foggy and Karen are out, it’s late and you are both way too overworked. You thought you could get away with hiding your investigation into one of his high-profile cases from him after he explicitly told you to stay away from it, but after watching Karen, you got motivated and it wasn’t until the clock struck twelve today that he opened his files to evidence he surely hasn’t put there and he realized what you were up to. Needless to say that his worry has made him angry. He doesn’t understand how you can be so reckless and won’t take a simple ‘no’ for an answer, and it frustrates him to no end that you refuse to have a proper conversation about the danger you put yourself in and the position he now finds himself in. You’ve made your case pretty straightforward, but you refuse to listen, and that’s what drives him up the walls.

So when you tell him, “Fuck you!” Under your breath, all self-control and tendency to try and be kind snaps in him.

“Watch who the fuck you’re speaking to,” Matt says. He doesn’t raise his voice, but the amount of pressure he puts behind delivering his words suffices just enough to get his point across, “I am not one of those idiots who take shit from you!”

Other couples fight too, there is no denying that, but there is something that happens almost every time you and Matt get in such a situation. Your words turn into ticking time bombs, and you are quick to explode. He thinks he’s in control, you refuse to bow down, and then the situation escalates to the point you wonder if the neighbors think you two are anything but healthy. And maybe your fights aren’t healthy, but you love each other and you always find common ground. Eventually.

But not right now. You refuse to give him the satisfaction of doing what he says or admitting whatever mistake he thinks you made. You were just being yourself, really.

“Watch it?” you repeat, the words rolling off of your tongue like sour candy. “I’m not watching it. In fact, I’m going to act blind just like you and not even remotely watch it. What are you gonna do about it?”

He chuckles darkly. “I’m serious, you better watch it sweetheart or I’m gonna put you in your place,” he says. There is something about his silent anger that sends shivers down your spine.

You’re not scared of him; Matt would never hurt you. The exact opposite of fear happens whenever he talks to you that way, and you want to know how far you can push it because this argument is silly and he’s going to realize that soon enough. But you are not one to back down without a fight, and if you want to get what you so desperately crave, he needs to fold first. But God, he is so hot, and he looks even more alluring with his sleeves rolled up and his cheeks flushed like that.

He towers over you as if he owns you. You’re a good few inches shorter than him, but that has never stopped you before. He likes to make fun of it, you like to make him regret it. You complete each other and yet you tear each other apart just the same.

You mimic his stance with your hands on your hips and your head slightly tilted and you know it drives him mad. “You can put me in my place. In fact, since you think you’re supposed to scare me, I have a solution to make it easier for you,” you say. Your voice still sounds like sour candy, but he can’t stomach it. He’s almost allergic to it. All he wants is to stuff your smart mouth with his tie, tie you up and fuck you until you can’t walk straight anymore. Perhaps then you will realize that you can’t do everything without facing the consequences.

Your vision is red like the towel held before a bull in the ring. Reaching for his office at the dinner table, you drag it out and place it before him. You climb on it, making sure you are face-to-face now and you cross your arms. “There, done,” you say.

Matt takes a moment to register what you’ve done, and you think you’ve finally won, but then he opens his mouth and laughs right at you. That bastard.

“Don’t laugh at me.”

He raises his eyebrows. “You’re not seriously telling me what to do, are you, sweetheart?”

“Maybe I am. It’s not my fault you’re being such a dick.”

Bad idea.

Suddenly, his arms are around your waist. He picks you off the chair and throws you over his shoulder. It’s almost effortlessly how he carries you over to his desk and throws you on it, the wooden legs shaking under the weight.

“I’m being a dick?” he growls, leaning over you and trapping you against the desk with his arms on either side of you. “I think you need a reality check.”

You try to wriggle out of his grasp as you snap back, “What are you gonna do, hm?”

He smirks. “What am I gonna do with you? You’re being a brat, don’t you think that’s gonna have consequences?”

“Oh, fuck you!”

“No. Fuck you!” He swiftly pulls you off the desk and spins you around, arching your back far enough to press your chest flat to the wooden surface. “And I mean that quite literally,” he says.

You gasp when he grabs the hem of your skirt and roughly bunches it up around your waist. The comeback you had planned out gets stuck in your throat when his hand collides with your bare ass cheek. He gives them both a firm squeeze and his grip is almost territorial, as is the growl that comes straight from his soul into your ear.

“Why did you go quiet? Ain’t so talkative now, hotshot?” he says.

He doesn’t waste time. Don’t get me wrong, Matt Murdock could spend centuries between your thighs and it would keep him alive long enough to draw orgasm after orgasm out of you as he devours your sweet little cunt like his last meal over and over again. He could stuff you with his fingers all day and then leave you empty just to be craving more. He could rub your clit as hard as possible, then go slow and gentle until your body quivers with the magnitude of an earth-shattering orgasm that has you screaming his name in ecstasy and makes his neighbors complain. He could do it and he loves to do it, but today, he is anything but a patient man.

Your panties are soon a mess of ripped fabric on the floor of his office. The wetness seeping out of your pussy hits the cold air and you hiss, but all you get in return is a low chuckle. “What’s wrong?” Matt coos into your ear. “Did my pretty little slut forget how to speak?”

There are many buttons he can push to make you obey, even though you don’t often seem like it, but the way he talks to you is by far the easiest to shut you up.

He slides his middle finger through your slick folds, gathering the wetness and spreading it over your clit. You jolt. He’s being rough already, and when he shoves his finger inside of you, you moan. He curls it up and hits your G-spot without a single struggle, but that’s all he does. He tells you without words that he knows what you want, but he won’t give it to you. Instead, you hear his belt buckle hit the floor, and then it's the tip of his cock that is rubbing through your arousal.

Your walls clench around thin air. Your cunt barely lets him in, but he pushes inside of you anyway. The pain mixes with pleasure, your legs squeezed so tightly together, you can feel him bulge your stomach from where your torso is pressed against his desk. All air leaves your lungs. Left behind is a gurgled scream that makes him smirk into your shoulder blades as he licks a long stripe over the back of your shirt.

You reach back to touch him, but he slaps your hand away. “Only good girls get to touch,” he says, “and you haven’t been a very good girl, have you?”

“No,” you sob. His cock is so deep inside of you now, brushing your cervix with every relentless stroke and you hate it. You hate him for pulling this card because he knows you can’t resist.

Tears are streaming down your face.

“Pathetic. Always talking back at me but when it’s my cock inside of you, you suddenly can’t speak.” Matt grabs a fistful of your hair at the same time he slaps your ass. “I shouldn’t even be fucking you right now because quite frankly, you don’t deserve it. You don’t deserve my cock and you certainly don’t deserve to come, not like this.”

You clench around him as if to keep him so deep inside of you. “Please, don’t stop. I’m sorry!” your voice echoes through the office in a desperate cry. Your fists are locked up, trying hard not to touch him, but it’s torture. You want nothing more than to put your hands on him, maybe even push him away because God, he is so deep, you’re not sure you’re going to survive.

Every inch of your body yearns for him. He hits all of the right spots over and over again, and he drives you higher up the precipice, ready to push you over, but you know he won’t let you. It’s the way he purposely avoids touching your clit that tells you that you have to work for that orgasm, but it’s almost impossible when you can’t speak. Every word turns into a moan when he hits the sweet spot inside of you, your eyes roll back and you let out a broken scream of his name. Surely, Foggy and Karen could hear you from home.

He slaps your ass again, relishing the feeling of the flesh jiggling at the impact. Your skin is hot and sweaty, and there is a clear imprint of his fingers on your hips and your rear now, too. He feels your erratic heartbeat and tastes your arousal in the air. Your muscles clench wildly, and you try your best not to move. You’re moaning, you’re so loud, but no words are coming out of your mouth. It’s just you and him and his cock that manages to make you feel things no man has ever made you feel before. You’re in heaven but at the same time the bus to hell is about to leave, and he is not yet done punishing you.

Matt grabs a hold of your throat and hauls you back into his chest. “What was that?” he asks, his voice now a desperate puff of air too.

“I’m s- ugh!” You can’t help yourself; you reach for his hip as he delivers another hard thrust directly against your cervix.

He slaps your hand away again. “Answer me!”

“I’m sorry!” Instead, you place your hands on your chest. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to- to- fucking hell!”

His grip tightens around your jugular. “Thin ice, sweetheart,” he barks.

“Please, Matty, I didn’t mean to… I didn’t mean to! I thought I was… I was doing the right thing and I- ah!”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry!”

“Uh-huh, what else? Come on, this isn’t an apology when I can tell your tight little cunt is just desperate to come all over my cock. That’s the only reason you’re apologizing and I am fed up with your fucking attitude.”

He wouldn’t let you come that easily, it becomes crystal clear to you.

Matt pulls out of you entirely, cupping your cunt with his large hand, and starts rubbing your clit. It’s a pace you have gotten used to, but the strength he puts behind the pressure he applies once again renders you speechless.

He smirks, his teeth sinking into your shoulder. “Oh, you’re so wet for me. You’re dripping. I could smell you even from the other end of the city. You’re so desperate, it’s pathetic. You need to come so badly, don’t you? You love when I talk to you like the dirty little whore you are, hm?”

“F-” You bite your lip until you can taste copper on your tongue. “Matthew!” He delivers a hard blow to your clit and you jolt, every fiber of your being high with electricity.

The pain only adds to the arousal that is flooding out of you, or it feels that way because he simply won’t stop, even when you beg him to. You could utter your safeword, but as much as it hurts, his punishment feels so damn good, your body just wants to let go and come. He just has to let you come, and you hate him that he is playing games that make it even harder for you not to.

“That’s not an answer,” he says.

“Yes,” you choke out, “I love it!”

“I can feel how close you are, baby. You’re squeezing me so tightly.”

“Please, just- I’ll do anything, just let me come!” He has you right where he wants you.

“Is that so?” He makes you feel so stupid, but you love it.

“Yes!”

“Then tell me what I want to hear and maybe I’ll put my cock back inside of you. If you don’t, well… I’ll make better use of that big mouth of yours since you love to tell me how much bigger you can be, see if you can swallow as much as you like to chew, but I doubt it.”

Matt’s the cruelest when he stops right before you can tumble over the edge. You grip the desk, your chest heaving with abandon as the orgasm dissipates. He turns you around and grabs your chin roughly between his fingers. “Talk,” he demands.

You swallow, his brown eyes wild, but you could never be scared of him. “I’m sorry,” you whisper, and then, hoping you’re right with your assumptions, “I’ll stop being a brat and do as I’m told,” you say. “You were right, I’m sorry. I’ll do anything, just please! Please…”

The faintest hint of a smile shows on his face and finally, he leans down to kiss you. It’s a heated kiss, his tongue already halfway down your throat, but you take that as an invitation to touch him.

Your ass hits the desk’s surface and he spreads your legs again. This time, he slides in a little slower, sensing the soreness of your muscles. Though as soon as his cock is sheathed deep within you, his hips start snapping in the same relentless rhythm from before again.

You cling to him and the desk, pulling at his hair and just hoping he will have mercy on you this time. As his pelvis grinds against your clit, his tip brushing your G-spot followed by the relentless assault of your cervix, it doesn’t take long for you to fly to the top of the cliff, ready to fall off.

He kisses you again. “Good girl,” Matt murmurs.

The praise makes you clench.

“Such a good little slut.”

He knows exactly how to use his words, the fine line between degradation and praise that blurs into pleasure. He doesn’t hurt you with malicious intent, he hurts you just right where pain and pleasure meet, and he does it because he loves you. He may not always seem like it, especially while you’re fucking, but this is what you both crave, this is what you both need, and he does it perfectly every single time. You can’t get enough of him, he is everywhere, and you couldn’t bare to lose him.

This time, it is you who kisses him. He can feel the vulnerability in your touch, how your nails no longer dig into his skin but rather caress him. You’re close, clenching, and your moans seem so close to his ear, his cock starts to twitch. He can feel the pressure building alongside yours.

He changes the angle of his thrusts a little, grabbing your thigh and pushing it up against his chest. “Tell me,” he pants, “Who do you belong to?”

You whimper, “You.”

“That’s right. And whose pussy is this?”

“Yours!”

“Yeah. You have such a fucking big mouth, it’s infuriating. But it’s my mouth. Everything about you is mine, do you understand? No one else gets to have you like this, touch you like this, or see you like this. You get that?”

“Yes!” you cry out as you throw your head back, and his hand is right back at your throat.

Matt grunts. “Good girl. That’s a good-” he thrusts forward hard, “fucking-” he pulls out and thrusts back in, bottoming out fully, before repeating the same motion as he finishes with a loud, “girl. Now fucking come for me!”

Your body responds to his command before your brain can even register it. The orgasm crashes into you like the wave of a tsunami. Your thighs lock around his hips, you’re shaking, you’re falling, and your moan turns into a scream that is barely muffled by the hand that is still choking you, still holding on as the warmth of his cum fills your abused cunt.

He crashes your lips together, swallowing your noises. With every anguish thrust, he makes sure his cum stays seated deep within you, a reminder that you are no one’s but his, and he’s the only one who gets to mark you like that. Always.

You wouldn’t want it any other way.

The moment after is silent. Only your labored breathing fills the air. Matt buries his head in your neck and he holds you there. The roughness from before it’s gone. He is gentle now, seeking your comfort and maybe something else he can’t describe. You melt into his touch. He holds you close and you do the same for him, stroking your hand through his hair. You’re both breathless but you’re calm, and all the stress from before falls off of your shoulders.

“You okay?” you ask once you find your words again.

He nods, silently at first, but then he slowly lifts his head. “Did I hurt you?” he asks.

You’re quick to wipe the guilt off his face. “I’m perfect.”

“Okay, good.” He presses a kiss to your forehead. “I was worried there for a second.”

“You could never hurt me.”

“That’s not entirely true”

“Matthew-”

“I could tell you you’re hot when you’re feisty, but that you’re wrong about 98% of the time.”

You feign a gasp. “Ouch!” you press a hand to your chest. “That was harsh.”

“See?” he smirks, and it tells you that he has found back to himself rather quickly. “Told you,” he says.

With a chuckle, you pull him down to press a kiss to his swollen lips. “I love you,” you say.

And Matt is quick to return the sentiment with an even gentler kiss, “I love you too.”

You know that the next time you two fight, you will act the same, you won’t shut your mouth and he will once again find himself agitated enough to fuck you against every surface he can find, but if he knows one thing it’s that he wouldn’t have it any other way, and he loves how feisty you are regardless of what you say or do. He’s head over heels in love with you, and you are a real keeper.

At least with you, he will never have a dull moment again in his life. That counts for more than you could possibly know. And as he’s holding you close, his cock still buried deep inside of you, he thanks God for putting you on his path.

#matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock smut #pwp #matt murdock x f!reader #matt murdock #daredevil #lizzi writes #request #no y/n #reader insert

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analogwriting · 4 months

Text

Childhood Crush

Chapter 15: Bronze

Killer x gn!reader word count: 3.5k a/n: this part ended up being almost 7k words so i split it into two, so y'all getting a twofer (two for one - 241 - all that jazz) also relentlessly puts asking alexandria lyrics in it bc im still in mourning next

There wasn’t exactly a plan on dealing with Kese perse, but everyone agreed to let you take care of it for the most part. Everyone was going to act normal until you made your move. Follow your plays and whatnot. Though, Eustass just wanted to kill the fucker. He was beyond pissed - which was understandable. You’d also be so astronomically livid if someone lied to you about your brother dying only to find out he was alive the whole time. Even Killer seemed to be on the bandwagon for kill first, ask questions later for a little while.

But, you wanted to get answers first. Maybe it was just morbid curiosity. Maybe it was because you wanted to take his life with your own hands. Or maybe it was just you wanted to put absolute fear into his being. You wanted to see him beg for his life.

Shit, you didn’t know what you wanted. And there was no telling how you’d really react when you saw him either. You couldn’t help but feel a growing anxiety. Everything he said back then was hitting you right now. While you didn’t exactly believe them anymore, you remembered the pure devastation you had felt when he had said them. You couldn’t help but chuckle at the memory.

“What’s so funny?” You were pulled out of your thoughts as Eustass spoke. You were still stitching him up as his injuries were a bit more on the serious side. It was just the two of you as the others gathered and prepared themselves for heading back to the ship. “Just thinking about what Kese said before I left.”

He stopped, looking at you. “Wait, he said something to you? What?”

Right. You never told him all that. You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “I feel dumb for falling for it now, but yeah. He said some shit that fucked up my psyche there for a while.”

“Is that why you had started to pull away from us? And you left?”

You were quiet, but your silence spoke volumes. You felt anger radiate from Eustass even more. “That mother fu-”

“Tungsten. I’m going to take care of it. Like I said, I need information and also this is the best way for me to get closure.” He looked at you for a long moment before groaning. “Ugh. Fine.”

“Thank you.”

“What did he even say?” You were quiet for a moment, not wanting to admit it. It felt silly now. You know that your brother and crewmates would’ve never said the awful things he had referenced, but you were at such a low point that you would’ve believed anything.

“Bigs?” You looked up at him and sighed. Just as he couldn’t say no to you - you couldn’t say no to him. As you dabbed one of the cuts on his arm - his only arm, which you still couldn’t believe - you explained what happened that night. He was quiet, but you could feel him seething.

“You know none of it is true, right?” He waited until you were done before he had spoken, which wow. That’s growth. Him waiting to speak? Who taught him that? He was the king of interrupting people. You felt a moment of pride, but the somber mood was too heavy for you to really revel in it.

With a long sigh, you nodded. “I do now. It was stupid of me to believe him, I know. But…” Your face fell and he shook his head. “You were in a dark place, I know.”

“Let us not forget that I’m the one that forced you to go along with me,” he said with a smug smile. You mirrored his expression and laughed. “Not completely. I did end up deciding myself. You made yourself quite the compelling case.”

“Only because Killer put the cherry on top.” He paused. “And because he was the cherry on top,” he mumbled, but you didn’t quite make it out. “Huh?”

“Nothing.”

“You-”

The both of you laughed before falling into a somber silence. “You did more than anyone on the ship when it boiled down to it,” he said. You looked at him for a moment. “Tungsten, you don’t have to lie to make me fee-”

“It’s not a lie though. You did so fucking much for us. You made all of us stronger and our lives easier. You strengthened Dive’s teeth, gave Heat the ability to fucking breathe fire, taught both Heat and Wire how to smith, made various different kinds of machines n’ shit to help make ship life even easier, not to me-”

“Okay, okay. I get it.”

“I’m so serious, Bigs. And that’s not just the ship. The four of us definitely wouldn’t have lived without you growing up. I’m serious.” You looked at him, your eyes slightly widening as the playful mood was turning more sincere by the second and you felt your cheeks heat up. You didn’t know where all this sentiment was coming from and you didn’t know how to handle it.

“You’re a ray of fucking sunshine on our goddamn ship and I’ll be damned if I let someone take that away again,” he grumbled, looking away from you. “Everyone was super upset when you left - so don’t do that shit again.” You felt so many different waves of emotion right now. Eustass was never one to convey his actual feelings. You weren’t either. The both of you had your own way of expressing your love for each other, just as all siblings did.

But, hearing it was a lot different and you didn’t know how to react. You felt your brain doing a hard reboot.

“I didn’t…” No words were coming from you.

“Don’t get sappy, you know I hate that shit.” He didn’t look at you, keeping his head turned from you, clearly embarrassed from his own outburst. You couldn’t help but let out a small smile, moving on and finishing up dressing his wounds.

“Didn’t stop you though, huh?”

“What did you say?” He turned his eyes towards you, narrowing his eyes.

“You heard me, Tungsten. I think you’re the sappy one of the two of us.”

“Fuck you.”

“Fuck you.” The two of you glared at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter. You really missed Eustass. Well, of course you did - he was your brother.

You finished up, standing and dusting yourself off, Eustass following suit. “Alright, everyone! Let’s head out!”

Once more, you felt anxiety creeping back in. You weren’t sure how you wanted to handle the situation. You weren’t good with emotions. You weren’t good at verbally conveying them. Hell, at this point, your own anger probably would take over and you’d kill Kese for all you knew. But, you knew you needed answers first. You’d just have to remember that.

You were somewhat falling behind the group, thinking. A million scenarios ran through your head, but none of them seemed to be the way you wanted to go. The way you needed it to go. Though, what way did it even need to go? You weren’t sure. Ugh, thinking about it was hurting your head.

Finally, the ship came into view and honestly you couldn’t have been happier. This place had become your home. It felt more like home than your dingy home back on the island ever did. And now you were back, just as you needed to be. Everything felt right again.

“Ready?” You looked over, seeing that Killer had joined you. You sighed, shaking your head. “No, but I don’t have a choice, do I?” That laugh rang through, making you jump slightly. It was mostly just startling at this point because it was so loud and sudden. You smiled at him, trying not to show that it had startled you. You already knew he was sensitive about it, you didn’t want to add to it.

“I just don’t even know what I want to do. Or how I’ll react.”

“I mean, the captain and I can just take him out.”

“Okay, but that wouldn’t solve anything.”

“One less bastard to hurt you in the world - I’d say it’s worth it.” You paused for a moment. Did he just say to hurt ‘you’. Surely it was just a slip of the tongue, right? Yeah. He probably just meant in general. Just as there was a royal ‘we’, perhaps it was a royal ‘you.’

Before you could say anything, however, a voice rang through the night.

“You guys are back! How did it - oh shit.” You looked up, seeing the very bastard that brought so much pain and misery to your life without even trying. Fuck, you felt so stupid for letting him get to you in the way that he did. He was staring at you with wide eyes, obviously surprised to see you. You saw the fear plastered all over his face.

Something in the back of your brain snapped. “‘Oh shit’ is right motherfucker.” In moments you were on the ship and he was running, obviously trying to escape your wrath. You threw your dagger, catching him in the shoulder and sending him to the ground.

You were standing over him, seething. “What the fuck is your issue with me? What the fuck did I do to you?”

He was groaning and rolling around, clutching his shoulder. “Oh shove a pipe in it and answer me.” All it took was a dagger to the shoulder to take him down? You expected more from someone in your brother’s crew. Especially with the way he had been acting before - all high and mighty.

“Y/n, you’re not dead!” He looked at you, feigning surprise. “This is wonderful, but can I ask why you’re coming straight after me? What did I do?” He looked over as your brother was boarding the ship. “Captain! I think they’ve lost it!”

Eustass was on the ship now, folding his arms as he watched the scene before him. “You brought this upon yourself. And if I were you, I’d answer their fucking questions.” He shrugged, an amused, shiteating grin on his face. “It’s in your best interest.” He sat on a crate, giving himself a front row seat to whatever the fuck was about to unfold.

“You’re only still alive right now because of their mercy,” Killer chimed in, standing next to your brother.

You looked from them back down to Kese, who was looking up at you with wide eyes. “I-I swear I didn’t know you were alive!”

You knelt down, ripping your dagger out of his shoulder and he cried out. “You and I both know that’s a load of horseshit.” You slammed the dagger into the wood next to his head. “Now fucking answer me,” you spat.

“Please! I just wanted to be a part of the Kid Pirates and Myra-”

Your heart almost stopped. Why the hell was he mentioning her? Did he do something to her? Was she okay? Was Lily okay? “What?” You ripped the dagger out of the deck and pressed it to his throat. “What the fuck does Myra have to do with this? What did you do to her?” You were drawing blood at this point and he was terrified. His voice was shaking and he was blubbering like a baby. Man, you felt like a fucking fool for ever having feared him.

“I-I didn’t do anything! I was just doing what she told me to do! I wanted to be a pirate on this ship and she wanted you!”

You stopped. What? What the hell was he talking about? Wanted you? What the hell did he mean by that? Every answer he gave was raising another in its place. You looked at your brother who shook his head. “Do you have that letter?” you asked. He nodded, pulling it out of his person. “You fucking keep it on you?” He didn’t answer you, just handed it to you. “Shut it,” he grumbled.

You couldn’t even begin to imagine how Eustass had really been fairing this whole time, but it wasn’t well. You could tell that much. You could only imagine how you would react if someone told you your little brother died. Shit, he was the only reason you kept going when the both of you were younger. Just as he said he and his friends wouldn’t have been here without you, you wouldn’t have been here without him.

You opened it up, reading it over. You blinked as the words sank in. You looked at the picture that accompanied it. You knew this picture. You had been on a ladder to get some paints and on your way climbing down, you spilled all the paints and fell in the process. The photo was black and white, so you wouldn’t even be able to tell the colors of the paint. And you had been dazed at the time of the picture.

You remember moments after this picture, you sat up laughing. The whole lab was. But, with the way she had taken the picture along with the lack of color, it really did look like some kind of lab accident. You really did look dead. It was real uncanny valley.

Was Myra behind all of this?

“Bigs?”

You looked at your brother. “I know this picture. I had a stumble with some paints. That’s all it is. Paint.” You looked back down at it, paling. Was it all just a cover up? Why did she want your brother to think you were dead? Did it have to do with Kese saying she wanted you?

You knelt back down, glaring at Kese who yelped and backed away from you as he still clutched his shoulder. “Fucking spill, you incompetent son of a bitch.” You pointed the knife at his throat.

He stared at you with wide eyes. “She’ll kill me!”

“Keeping your tongue tight? I’ll kill you first if you don’t.” You pressed the knife into his throat, once again drawing blood. He yelped, sobbing. Fuck, he was pathetic. “O-Okay! Okay…”

“I-I’m from the island. The one where Myra’s from. I was one of her students and I always dreamt of bein-”

“Fucking-” You slammed the knife, the one Myra had specifically given to you, into his leg. He screamed, clutching it and sobbing. “You fucking stabbed me!” You glared at him.

“Cut your losses, you’re on thin ice, tread light,” you ground out. “I don’t fucking care about all that, get to the fucking important parts - you’re testing my fucking patience,” you spat, glaring at him, making him squeak. Fuck. Was he always like this? Why did Eustass keep him around?

Kese, despite his current wound that you’d given him, took a deep breath and started once more. “The c-captain was gaining notoriety and honestly, so were you. But, in the scientific community. Since you always visited the labs and tended to help out there, talk of you spread.” You blinked. You didn’t realize that you had your own reputation. Eustass and Killer were the ones with the large bounty - you didn’t even have one. At least, not at that time. You weren’t doing any fighting. You were just…researching and building. Doing what you did best.

“Myra wanted you to join her research team. Said she could use a sharp mind like yours. She also knew how I wanted to join the captain’s crew. So, she sent me to drive a wedge between you and the captain.” You felt like you were going to be sick. Your body went rigid with the pure, unbridled rage you were feeling. Myra seemed like she genuinely cared about you the entire time you were on the island. You couldn’t imagine her going through such lengths.

Fuck, you felt like a fool.

“I don’t fucking understand…then why would she send me here?”

Kese shook his head. “I-I don’t know.” You shot him a glare and he started crying all over again. “I swear, I don’t! She was supposed to just keep you at the island! I had no idea she was sending you here!”

This must’ve been what she meant by she had people here. Kese had been a mole this entire time and you were none the wiser. You played right into her hands. She had gotten exactly what she wanted. You stood up, swaying a bit from the headache you were developing. You didn’t know what to think about everything.

The woman you had just spent two years with…essentially playing house with as well. It was all a lie. Was Lily in on it too? No, that was impossible. She was too young to understand things like this, right?

You felt a hand to your back and you stiffened for a moment before you calmed. “Are you okay?” you heard Killer’s voice, but it sounded…so far away, despite him standing so close.

You looked at him for a moment before looking back down at Kese. You didn’t know. You didn’t know how you felt about any of this. Why the sudden change of heart in sending you straight to your brother? Did she feel guilty? You stared at the dagger next to Kese’s head, staring at the logo of the lab etched into it.

Numbness washed over you and you didn’t feel like you were in your body anymore. You couldn’t stand this, it was never meant to end up being this hard to process. “Do whatever the fuck you want to him. I’m over it.” Your voice was hollow, strained. You just wanted to go to bed at this point. You were…so tired. Nothing was processing. Your brain was trying to wrap around it all, but it was too much.

“W-What? N-No! Please!”

“Killer, you pick ‘em up with-” As your brother and his vice captain planned on whatever fate they had for Kese, you sauntered off. It wasn’t long before the traitor’s screams tore through the night.

“Y/n?” You looked up, seeing Dive prancing over to you. “Are you going to bed already?” she asked, putting her hands on her hips. “We still need to celebrate the victory!” She huffed, shaking her head.

“Besides, we haven’t had your cooking in forever! Would you make something for us? Pleeeease?”

“Now, now, Dive. You should let them rest. They’ve been through a lot. We’re not celebrating until tomorrow anyway.” You looked up, seeing Wire standing there. You nodded in agreement with him, a tired smile spreading across your features. “I’ll make sure to cook everyone’s favorites tomorrow, okay?” You ruffled her hair.

“I want to sleep too!” You blinked, looking at her. “You wanna have a sleepover?” You grinned at her. You did this a few times before. Sometimes, when she first joined, she had nightmares of some kind and would be up a lot. So, she’d come hang out with you in the lab, sometimes you both would end up falling asleep curled up on the futon in the lab. Most of the time you didn’t remember falling asleep with a blanket on, but there always ended up being one. Even when Dive wouldn’t sleep with you now that you thought about it.

You shook your thoughts away as Dive spoke with excitement. “Yeah! Sleepover!” You smiled, turning to head towards your lab. “Keep an eye on them, yeah?” You heard Wire say to Dive. Ah, she wanted to make sure you were okay. You appreciated it, honestly. None of anything felt real right now. You were on the verge of a mental break, you could feel it. Someone to ground you would be good right now.

Part of you felt like if you woke up tomorrow, you’d end up back at the lab and this was all a dream.

You opened the door to your lab, blinking. Everything was exactly how you had left it. “The captain didn’t let anyone touch it after you left. Especially after…” Dive joined you once more and you looked over at her. You nodded, looking back. Everything had a fine layer of dust on it. You were going to need to do some serious cleaning, but you were too tired to do that right now.

“We can sleep in my bed,” Dive offered. Exhaustion was eating away at you and you nodded. You didn’t have any energy to argue or clean your own area. That was tomorrow’s problem. “That sounds lovely,” you mumbled with a yawn as he followed her to her room. She shared a room with Quincy, but you knew that the woman wouldn’t mind in the slightest if you stayed there for the night.

You crawled into bed, the smaller woman jumping into the bed with you with a laugh. She started prattling on about something or another, probably knowing that you just needed to not be alone with your own thoughts.

Which didn’t even end up mattering as you were asleep within moments.

#how many lyrics did i cram into here????#that's for me to know and you to not know #maybe idk if you're a fan of them like me tho lmfao #one piece #one piece x reader #one piece x you #killer one piece #massacre soldier killer #killer x reader #am fics #cc #also hope you liked the confrontation im terrible at this

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stuckinapril · 9 months

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im an ex muslim who still lives in a muslim majority country in west asia and my culture is interwoven with islam deeply, and unfortunately i deal with people like your anon very often online BUT i’ve never seen anyone else whos not a muslim handle these stuff as well as you do. im really sorry you’re dealing with all this but also thank you so so much for making it such a safe space here. you are such a good person and i hope every blessing you deserve finds you 💛

you’re welcome babe!! i’m not muslim, but my mom is & it makes my blood boil that people would dare speak of arabs/islam like that. that anon literally sent an ask like “u pretend this is ur persona but ur arabic” as if being “arabic” is a personality trait to begin w?? as if arabs do not have the right to have a personality that goes beyond just their religion???? it makes me fucking LIVID for my mom who is an educated engineer/the smartest & most beautiful woman i know, my uncle who has an md/phd and plays in the orchestra, my great uncle who is a renowned surgeon etc etc the ignorance just runs so deep and it’s disgusting. it’s like being muslim (or arab even) cannot coexist with being open-minded, with enjoying things, w having preferences, w literally just having space as a person like other people do.

not that i owe that anon an explanation, but im literally an american girl who was raised under the roof of a very liberal mom. maybe i’m not a common case, but my mom is very lax / allowed me to choose between religion or no religion / allowed me to wear whatever i want / allowed me to move out at my discretion bc she knows i’m an adult who can make her own choices. so offensive that they literally generalize arabs to the point that every arab girl has to still be living w her parents / unable to experience anything. it’s such a stereotype & it icks me out beyond what words could say. not every arab girl is a caged bird. not every arab parent is a dictator. “arab” is not just one entity—people engage with the culture in different ways, to varying degrees.

i know sweet & smart & beautiful women who wear the hijab & are more than what that anon could ever hope to be & have the right to step on them. it did not pass me that the moment i revealed i had an arab heritage, that anon started sending racist asks / claiming i’m lesser than other people / making absolutist statements about how i live my life. literally an actual racist in my inbox. it’s just this one anon tbh everyone else is great, but they’ve been super persistent & that tells me it’s rooted in racism. it cannot be anything else. they do not know enough about me for it to be about me as a person—to them i’m just an arab entity that has to be made to feel lesser than.

i’m sorry you have to deal w this love :( this blog will alwayssss be a safe space. always. i love you

#so done w all the harmful stereotypes & jokes. arab culture is so rich #it’s the last thing that deserves to be reduced to this #ask

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elliewiltarwyn · 4 months

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Top 5 Mounts! I love seeing which mounts people are drawn too!

ohhh, that's not something I think about often, and I'm lucky enough to have acquired a hefty number of rare ones, so this is going to be fun and sentimental! and maybe a little humblebraggy im sorry im not trying to be! :D

-------------

Eden

like many players I'm sure, Shadowbringers was when the game really for good hooked me for life, and Ryne is a significant part of that. I loved her character so much that I was overjoyed when I realized the raid series was not only going to expand on her as a character, but give her a girlfriend.

But that's not the only reason; Eden's Promise is also the tier my static formed and we began to take on savage raids, and one of my greatest memories of this game is defeating the final E12S boss alongside them like 0.7 seconds before she enraged. The Oracle of Darkness is still one of my favorite fights in the whole game, and between that, the fact that the whole raid storyline is a handwrapped gift for lesbians who have Ryne as their favorite character, and a personal fondness for FF8 YEAH THAT'S RIGHT I SAID IT SUCK IT GAMEFAQS BOARDS FROM 1998...well, getting to ride Actually Eden in this game kind of rules.

I do wish it played The Extreme though. :V

2. Sunforged

Meanwhile, Abyssos was extremely memorable for, unfortunately, much different reasons. A lot of our group started facing a lot of personal problems IRL, and we had to say goodbye to some very good friends we had made and then bring new ones up to speed on the tier, so it took us an immensely long time to make it all the way to P8S, prog both phases of the fight, and get eight clears for all of us; we were struggling so much that even when the tier unlocked, we weren't able to clear him more than once a week. I still think P8S is too rough around the edges and I like the fight a lot less than the other Pandaemonium finales - not necessarily poorly designed, but extremely demanding to the point it was actually taking a toll on us.

...So basically, to me the Sunforged represents us dragging our broken, battered bodies over the finish line of the raid tier, succeeding despite all the shit both it and real life threw at us. We fought really fuckin' hard for this fucker, and as difficult as it was I'm really, immensely proud of us for managing it.

Also the mount itself is just sick af. Big fire snek!

and it turns into a godsdamned phoenix for flight, come on!!

3. Garlond GL-II

i mean come on this thing was built for biker girl femroes!!

4. Megaloambystoma

I am BEYOND LIVID that the Axolotl mount is locked behind Savage. Savage is for neckbeard no-lifers who play this game 24/7. Give them a crappy Magitek mount or something but cute mounts do NOT belong to raiders!!!

okay but seriously look at this dope. what a good boy. and in addition to being cute AF he ALSO has a sentimental story about my static's experiences with the relevant raid tier: for some strange reason, for the last bits of phase 1 and all of phase 2 of P12S in particular, I was the one who ended up studying the fight, writing down explanations, walking the group through the mechanics, and making callouts. it'd be a little aggrandizing to claim that Pallas Athena is my victory because obviously it's the whole group's... but it is the fight that somehow made me the one confident enough to lead my friends through it.

So in a weird way, this little dope is like, a representation of my self-esteem. I love him.

5. Fat Cat

I'm a cat person. I was morally obligated to buy this. Pay no attention to the mount description that posits that it is either a VOIDSENT using a BLOATED CAT'S CORPSE AS ITS CORPOREAL VESSEL, or a DECEASED PET REANIMATED by one well versed in the NECROMANTIC ARTS. these are lies and slander. look at this :3 face. is this the face of someone who would hide their true insidious voidtinged nature? clearly not. stop worrying about it. you don't need to sleep with a knife under your pillow with this baby around. >:3

this was really fun to reminisce and write about, thank you @disciple-of-frost for the ask!!

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #femroe #wol questions #ask games #ffxiv mounts #ffxiv raiding #there are so many good mounts that deserve honorable mentions but it was shockingly easy to narrow down top 5 at least lol #honorable mentions include: pod 602 because i love nier; battle panther which was my first tank achievement mount;#rolling tankard because it comes with a laser button; lunar kamuy because wayward daughter is AMAZING; fae gwiber bc trans rights dragon;#demi-ozma bc i like orb and cube; amaro because Seto still makes me cry; miw miisv bc it's just so out there and hilarious #there's a lot of good stuff! and i don't want to think about how long i've spent collecting all these rare ones! :')#long post #just in case

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eld-red · 2 months

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tl;dr im thinking about sniper’s and lucy’s friendship. a lot. he knows lucy needs someone to be there for her, and if spy won’t step the hell up, then he fucking will. this is very much a thought dump.

the beginning of lucy’s and sniper’s friendship is something i think about but i still don’t have all the details worked out for it. i feel like i might be getting closer?

by all means, he never wanted to be her friend. the first time she came to sit near him, he put up with it because she needed to be somewhere quiet. he understood—the others can get quite loud sometimes. the second time, he was confused as to why she came back, and the third, he started getting annoyed with her presence. he didn’t want her hanging around him, but he didn’t really have a real reason to use to get her to leave. she was quiet, he expected her to be a chatterbox like her brother. she wasn’t. sometimes she even asked to look at his guns because she thought sniping was interesting.

sniper (at least to me) is incredibly closed off emotions wise. he didn’t want to get attached to her or he was worried that he would because like. there might have been some sort of subconscious feeling of wanting to protect her (he knows lucy can hold her own, but she’s still way too young to be working alongside mercenaries) among other feelings too but she has her brother already. he thought that her brother would be enough and she’d be fine.

something pushed him to realize that she does need more people she trusts besides her brother. right now that reason is because he saw her have some sort of like moment of shutdown or he saw her crying (moment of emotional vulnerability) and it doesnt sound right to me.

i also had the idea of like. so lucy was forced to rapidly mature WAY too early and fast for her age. in order to survive, she felt she had to “kill” the girl that she was. and it caused her to be in this really weird balance of:

fierce independence (she knows she can do it on her own and will refuse any help) and concerning codependence

because the girl she was never died. she just kept getting angrier and more upset and afraid as the years in that lab went by. lucy is trying so hard to repress that girl. but that’s only making everything worse, because her trying to insist that she doesn’t need a parental figure is only making that girl more angry and she is trying to claw and scream her way out of lucy. she hasn’t had a parental figure since she was six. she’s lacked guidance and attention that a parent would give her for a decade. and there is only so much her brother can do to help her.

i know at this point in lucy’s story sniper doesn’t know that he’s adopted. but i noticed that any time i write about spy being quite bluntly, a shitty fucking dad, sniper always tends to be the most upset with spy out of all the other mercs. he always has the most to say about that.

and i think i’ve finally realized why that is. sniper has an especially like. intimate history with the matter of what real parents do. he knows that real parents step the fuck up for their kids when they need help or guidance or comfort. and spy DEFINITELY knows that his kids, especially lucy, need help. again: lucy has lacked a parent figure for the past ten years.

spy was so worried about irreversibly fucking up his kids, he did something that irreversibly fucked up his kids. so scout and lucy would both be beyond livid when they find out. but sniper knows that this relationship can be mended. that it will be. it’s just going to take a lot of time and a lot of rebuilding of trust. but eventually, he thinks that spy would have a normal relationship with his kids.

so why. won’t he. just take. that opportunity. step up for them why do you keep ignoring it why the hell did you DISGUISE YOURSELF AS YOUR SON TO COMFORT YOUR DAUGHTER you are a goddamn coward.

sniper will get. like really worked up about it if he thinks about it for too long. or if something happens that prompts these thoughts to get back into his head.

but then he thinks about how. he didn’t want to step up into that position at all. because it isn’t and wasn’t his job to. but he’s glad he did. because he also found a friend in lucy, and she’s an awesome fucking kid.

#tf2 #eldred’s silly thoughts #sniper tf2 #all i know. is that lucy came to him and he did not care for it #ha ha meet the sniper reference im sorry #the doll tf2 #tf2 oc #no what are you talking about i have a TOTALLY normal relationship with my own father slash lie

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thequietmanno1 · 5 months

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Thelreads, MHA 285, Replies Part 1

1) “But alright alright, I know that there’s always a huge revelation or the title itself is a spoiler, I know how it works, it ain’t my first rodeo, so, where did we left last time? Oh Yeah, Bakugo taking steps on his redemption arc and Midoriya being fucking pissed. Yeah, that’s the gist of it, so let us jump in on Chapter 285!”- Hey, you know what the most popular form of redemption is?….dying through a heroic sacrifice to save the hero! It happened in Star Wars, and since Horikoshi’s a proven SW nerd….

2) “THAT CERTAINLY BODES WELL FOR THIS CHAPTER :)))) “- Well, they stopped Izuku from reaching the point of no return, but given who swapped out for Tomura as their main opponent, it might actually have been better to let him keep going, even with the sacrifice of his body….

3) “But even with that in mind, Midoriya seems to have been using a higher output of power and even so he hasn’t slink-ified his arms yet, so, it seems like we know what the chapter will be about.”- His arms are still pointing the right way, and he’s been training his body’s durability to better contain his full power. Sadly, AFO accelerated his plans so quickly there’s just not enough time to properly master his strength no matter how hard he focuses on it, so all Izuku can do is push himself to whatever limits he’s got and work with that, praying it’ll be enough….but it looks like that’s a vain hope regardless. Toura’s biggest advantage is no doubt his healing right now. No matter how hard Izuku beats him, the fact that Tomura can undo it means that he can always recover better than izuku, and nothing the heroes have hit him with has yet managed to psuh im beyond the point of no return. Unless somebody can figure out a way to make the damage permanently stick, conflict with Tomura is a steady losing one regardless of what advantages we have against him.

4) “huummmmmm… I know what it means when the arms looks like that, seems like we’re slowly getting to the point of no return for that limb.”- Not yet past the limit, but Izuku should prey that Eri’s managed to master her Rewind enough to get him back into fighting shape. At this point, he’ll have to cripple himself just to get AFO to back off from the fighting, let alone actually stopping him.

5) “You know Midoriya, I think it would be far safer and more devastating if you were using your legs to kick him around. Keep the arms intact to allow you to use blackwhip and kick him like the football”- On the other (non-broken) hand, Izuku still needs to walk and move under his own power. When the dust settles in the aftermath, Izuku needs his legs to be functioning more than he needs his arms, and whilst he is using all his limbs right now, he can more afford to go hog-wild with his upper set than his lower, because his Black Whip can, if needed, compensate for his arms, even if he can no longer throw a punch. If he’s gonna cripple himself stopping Tomura, then his arms are simply better to fully exhaust than his legs.

6) “Midoriya my boy I know you’re absolutely livid but jesus fuck that is a lot of punishment on your arms! I haven’t seen you throw a single kick so far even though that was supposed to be your thing, what happened? Did the rage clouded your mind, and you want to defeat him All Might-style?”- It might be a bit hard to tell, but Izuku actually is throwing kicks in there- just so fast it’s hard to see. The “st Louis” attack is one he used for his kick-based style, and his legs are constantly blurring throughout this barrage because he’s using all four limbs to batter Tomura’s shit in – if they weren’t in mid-air, he’d be an immobile target flopping about on the ground right now, but thanks to his current Quirk combination, he can fully burn through every limb he’s got until Tomura takes more damage than he can recover from – which also fuels the reasoning behind him going that far. Once Izuku stops, he won’t be able to fight at this 100% level anymore, and will be wide open, so it’s all or nothing right now.

7) “Okay so it is in fact working, even with the regeneration at a fraction of the expected it seems like Midoriya is managing to overpower it, but to be honest I don’t know if Midoriya’s body can keep it together long enough to finish Shigaraki. We’re on a point where it’s a race to see whose body’s blow up first.”- One boy’s racing towards self-destruction, the other’s trying to resist it, and it’s hard to tell whose physical conditioning will allow them to triumph – only that no other hero/villain could force the other to go this far to win. If nothing else, this fight cements that each other is the only counter to their immense full power.

8) “Midoriya please take a chill pill before you burst a vein on your brain”- Unfortunately, AFO’s here to throw a barrel of gasoline on the fire….

9) “I have a feeling this is gonna be a hell of a high-five they are about to inflict upon the world”- Izuku will throw hands until he literally only has stubs to thrash Tomura with.

10) “There must be a myriad of quirks that can be used to counter Midoriya’s onslaught, but can you manage to use them properly Shigaraki? This boy specializes in analyzing the situation and counteracting it immediately, and he just shut-off any sense of self-preservation, are you sure you have what it takes to stand up to him?”- Having so many powers you’ve only just wakened to and haven’t gotten a feel for is actually a massive disadvantage. It means you have too many options in a fight, whereas Izuku’s more limited number in comparison allows him to be quicker in action. Yes, Tomura may actually be stronger than Izuku in theory, but if he never gets a chance to use said strength, it’s meaningless.

11) “Also, yeah, Midoriya can’t, but does he care? And even if Shigaraki can regenerate, he himself already admitted that it is not managing to keep up, so he probably is gonna break down eventually. Both of them will in fact.”- The Hyper Regeneration is the key element here. With it, all Tomura needs is rest and the Quirk will eventually restore all the damage he’s taken like it never happened at all. In contrast, if Izuku gets too damaged, it means he can’t recover to the same extent, and with him accumulating injuries every time he’s gone overboard like this, it means if they both break down, Tomura’s the one who’ll come off better in the aftermath, so Izuku’s only real chance is to put everything he’s got into play, in hopes that Tomura get stuck with an injury he can’t recover from.

12) “Alright, so Shoto got promoted to lift operator, he’s gonna bring them closer to the two clashing titans so they don’t waste their precious firepower. Literally on Endeavor’s case. The roads have no idea what’s coming for them…”- Endeavour’s heat control and the ability to carbonise cells beyond Hyper Regeneration’s capacity to heal is their second-best option after OFA’s might- I believe that’s why parts of Tomura’s body are crumbling off after his barbequing – they’re too damaged to heal, so they’re being ejected from the main body for new tissue to replace them. Which means that the prominence burn was enough to almost kill Tomura….but sadly, pushing him to the brink of death just allowed his master the opportunity to step in and take the reins once his grip slipped.

13) “Rock please, you have no idea how many times they face death every week, trust me, they’ll be fine. The same can’t be said about endeavor, he’s about to go out with a boom, so to speak.”- Rock Lock being faced with the fact that he, the adult in this situation, can do nothing to protect them, despite the fact he logically should, because he’s ultimately just a side-character in this clash of titans. He wouldn’t have been even able to help with carbonising Tomura if he stepped in now. On the other hand, I like that the characters always acknowledge that these kids shouldn’t be doing this, fighting on the front lines, because whilst this is a war, it doesn’t need to be theirs. Unforcedly, whether he likes it or not, it’s always been Izuku’s war, his burden to bear alongside OFA, and his classmates are there to help him shoulder it however they can.

14) “WAIT BAKUGO, I THOUGHT THAT SHOTO WAS GONNA BRING YOU UP THERE AS WELL SO YOU DIDN’T WASTE YOUR SWEAT ARE YOU THAT IMPATIENT?!”- Might need a re-read. Bakugo says that he’s got the lifting covered, Shoto’s just there to help cool Endeavour down as much as he can so he can unleash a maximum Prominence Burn to his very limits.

15) “Look, by the time you guys get in there he’s gonna be a bit more than a piece of flesh barely holding on to itself, but still fighting. There’s no way to stop him now, even if Shigaraki is put down, he won’t stop.”- If he breaks off his limbs, he’s still got his teeth.

16) “Ooookay bakugo, this moment again… tell me, are you suspecting about something? Did you figure out on your own what is it that All Might was keeping from Midoriya? Have you found out how the not-Nana user meet their end?”- It’s not so much that Bakugo’s figured something out – in fact it’s the opposite. It’s what he doesn’t know about OFA, the unspoken mystery around the 4th and all the changes that have been occurring in the power that not even All Might is fully aware of or has any context for, and what the end result of these will be for Izuku – why him specifically, did it manifest? Will he be negatively affected by this transformation? Can he handle the full power, or will it be too much for his body, even after non-stop training? These and all the rest of the flashbacks tie into the underlying theme- Bakugo’s worried for Izuku, specifically because he knows him better than anybody else, and he knows he’s not worried for himself, no matter the damage he takes.

17) “I mean, yeah it is pretty much the same thing, we already talked about it before. They are the same, but they operate on opposite ends of the same scale, one grows by taking by force, the other grows by giving with consent. They are the same, but also, they are opposites.”- The opposite, but the same. In much the same way, for all the benefits that OFA gives Izuku, it brings him a lot of disadvantages- the self-damage to his body, the unknown changes taking place within it, how Izuku’s somehow in connection with actual ghosts of dead people, the fact that it makes him a massive target for Villains and specifically AFO – OFA has let Izuku do a lot of good, but it’s also been a curse to him as well, looking at all the negatives it’s brought into his life.

18) “Oh I remember this moment… Seems like you’re having some bad flashbacks right now Bakugo”- Worried for izuku’s wellbeing, because he’s seen him at his lowest, and knows he’s played a large part in that – guilt over how his insecurity lead to him bullying Izuku out of rejection for him, and how that fed into izuku’s low self-esteen which is playing a part in him brutally destroying himself at present right now, heedless of the self-damage.

19) “okay sorry I’m immediately distracted by the person back there on the right with eye-stalks. I want to know more about them, are they a slug? I want to see the Slugson (Slug person)”- But as much as the power has resulted in some negatives in Izuku’s life, it inspired him and Bakugo both, allowed All Might to show them what a real hero was like and gave them both a direction to channel their efforts into, gave Izuku hope of actually becoming a hero despite his powerlessness, even if it was originally created for a darker purpose of killing an evil madman, it’s become so much more than that. It’s been a blessing to Izuku in many ways as well, one that Bakugo is actually grateful for as much as he’s scared for Izuku’s wellbeing, because it allowed Izuku to confront him and Bakugo to acknowledge his own weakness that lead to their falling out. Good and bad things have both come from this power. @thelreads

#my hero academia #bnha #chapter replies #thelreads #mha 285

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lust4liyah · 1 year

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just a lil sum sum bcus im having big thoughts about my man miguel.....

not proofread! contains; chubby! fem! reader, unprotected sex, rough sex, degradation, bad spanish like really bad.

think about miguel o'hara who is just so so gentle with you, who always makes sure he’s never too rough with you when you try and play fight him when you get a bit too energetic at headquarters. you were always cheered on by gwen and jess, and miguel knows you get a big head from their encouragement, so he always feigns defeat. just to see you smile, but he'd never tell you that.

think about miguel o'hara who always goes easy on you when you challenge him to arm wrestle you. he always humors you, liking the determined look in your eye as you tell him, like you always do, that this time, you’ll really beat him. miguel knows full well his strength easily trumps yours, but your hands are just so much smaller than his. if he took these little challenges seriously, he could seriously hurt you! didn't you know how much smaller you were compared to him?

think about miguel o'hara who reluctantly has to scold you and threatens to separate you from hobie when you two are up to your shenanigans. maybe you two skipped another spider meeting, or maybe you two screwed around too much on a mission, miguel tells you he will physically take you and your close friend and put you on separate missions the next time this happens. you didn't believe him and told him you would be too heavy for miguel. miguel proves you wrong one day when he catches you and hobie messing around in on miguel's levitating platform, lifting you up in only one arm with a stupid smirk on his face as you yelled profanities at him.

think about miguel o'hara who carries you in his big arms after a long mission. you’re cuddled up against his chest, your spider suit was gone and you were only in the shorts and lacy tank top you always wore under your suit just in case. you were sleepy and lightheaded after all the tiring things you had to do, miguel couldn't just let you walk. miguel ignores the teasing from hobie and lyla when he held you close, focusing only on the way your soft skin feels against his hands. nobody notices the way he holds you closer against him on his lap, nobody notices the way he shudders when your plump body brushes against the sensitive spot in his tight suit.

think about miguel o'hara who lets you off easier than everyone else. you were a firecracker, a burning fire through the headquarters. your personality, though very kind and loving, was also sassy and bossy. a lot of the spiders always stop to stare in envy when you tell miguel how annoying he is when he sends you on a mission on your day off or when you tell him how stupid his theories are about the multiverse. had it been anyone else, miguel would have thrown them out the window of headquarters. but because it was you, miguel only sighed and rolled his eyes at your comments.

think about miguel o'hara who tries and fails to restrain himself when you try to argue with him. miles morales had just zipped his way back to his home universe and you were beyond livid with the way miguel handled the young boy. you cornered miguel in his platform, hair crazy from your mask and lips pouty from your frowns.

"are you out of your damn mind?! you could have seriously hurt him today or worse! you need to learn how to get your fucking anger in check!" you screamed at the man, an accusatory finger pointed at him.

miguel was huffing and puffing while you criticized him, his dark gaze piercing through you like a sword as he towered over you. you stared up at him, your doe eyes trying to keep eye contact even though you were clearly frightened. your back was pressed up against the desk and despite there being so much more space, miguel took a step closer to you.

you still kept talking.

"you think just 'cus you think you know so much 'bout the multiverse you can treat people that way? where the hell is your head at, miguel? the fuck is wrong with you―"

"crees que puedes decirme qué hacer?" he cuts you off. you let out a shaky breath at his words. miguel threw out all the protective regards he used to have for you. he had been so nice, letting you try and bully him around, being easier on you compared to the other spiders, and this is how you repay him? yelling at him for some idiot kid?

"you don't got any authority over me, niñita. who do you think you are trying to boss me around?" miguel's body was pressed against yours now. your heart was beating fast in your chest at the familiar nickname, he called you that every time he tried to make you feel small. "i... i'm not―"

"you think because i let you do what you want that you can talk to me like that? hm?" miguel pushes on as he leans down to get closer to your face. he sighs, caressing your cheek with a gentle hand. "i've spoiled you too much. sido demasiado amable con mi chica, now she thinks she can yell at me however she wants".

he dragged a hand down his face in frustration. "this is my fault, though, not yours. poor baby, you don't remember the rules 'cus you haven't had to follow them in so long". he lets out a sarcastic laugh.

"that changes today".

your eyes trailed away from miguel's, squeezing your thighs together. it's true, you weren't stupid. he was much nicer to you than everyone else. you were special! you knew you were at least to him, so why is he being so mean?

miguel's once soft and loving hand felt cold once he forced you to look at him, your chin in his hand and your head tilted up. "oye, don't look over there. i'm talking to you, aren't i?" a sick smile stretched on miguel's face. "look at me". he demanded.

think about miguel o'hara who has you on your back, your pants discarded and your chest heaving up and down as fat tears ran down your cheeks. miguel's arms were around your thighs, his hips snapping against yours in such mindblowing swiftness.

miguel growls as he pulls you into a deep kiss, slowing down his pace just a bit to thrust into your cunt harder, deeper. his cock touched the more sensitive parts of your pussy, making you squeal into the kiss. he let you go, his previous pace making a comeback.

"mi-miggy! slow down, please! 'm g'nna... oh shit!" you cry out. the way your cunt sucks and pulses around miguel's cock makes him groan. he feels amazing, you wouldn't tell him that though. he stretched your poor abused cunt so good, makes your juices get all over him.

a hand reaches up to your cheek, wiping away your tears. "want me to slow down? yeah?" he asks you rhetorically. he pushed his hips into you, pulling you down so he could get a deeper angle. your fingers brushed through his hair, tugging ever so slightly as you cried harder.

you brought him closer. "please, miggy, please slow down!"

"slow down?" he parroted you. he smirked, his hands digging into your soft rolls as he thrusts harder, grinding his hips into your clit. "you keep pullin' me in, mama. how could i slow down when this pretty pussy is cryin' for me like that?"

as if to emphasize, miguel gently let one of your thighs go and gave your clit a harsh slap. you let out an embarrassing yell while miguel groaned against your neck. "this is your lesson, niñita. es como aprendes. can't have such a small thing like you bossin' me around".

"miggy", you sobbed, your hands pawing at his chest, "bein' so mean. please, miggy. m'gnna cum! g'nna make a mess, please!" you babbled.

you could've cringed out how pathetic you sounded, but right now, you weren't focused on that. the hot feeling of miguel's cock sliding in and out your walls, the wet kisses miguel left on your neck, the feeling of his balls slapping against your ass, that was all you were focused on.

"deja de llorar, niñita. you see what happens when you try 'n' boss me around? a 'lil thing like you?" miguel laughed pressing a kiss just under your eye where tears were falling.

"been too nice to you, been too kind to this sweet cunt, huh, sweetheart? maybe you'll listen to me this way". a rough hand spanked the side of your ass, making you cry out.

you pulsed around miguel, his slap making you tense up. the feeling of his fingers against your skin made you feel like you were on fire. miguel panted, his cock beating into the creamy lips of your pussy.

"'member what you said, niñita? said that i'm a cocky asshole that wouldn't know how to handle you even if i tried? what happened to that? what happened to my loud girl? where'd she go?"

the recalling of your words to miguel when you first challenged him to an arm wrestle played in your head. you were so confident then.

couldn't handle me my ass!

"oh, i know where she went". a soft chuckle came from miguel's throat as he grabbed your cheeks and made you look him in the eyes. "she's right here! right in front of me, gettin' her holes filled by her boss' cock". miguel laughed in your face cruelly, drawls the stupid attractive sound out, and shoves his hips forward, his tip reaching your cervix at this point.

a small burst of confidence flowed through you as you gripped the wrist holding your face. "n-not my―"

"what? not your boss?" miguel finished the thought before you can get the words to leave your mouth. he laughed again, the sound making your cunt ache.

he toyed with your breasts, pulling a nipple in his mouth. he suckles on it for a moment, and at that moment you feel the sharp fangs of his you so loved to graze your nipple before he let it go with a 'pop!' coming from his mouth.

"not your boss, but you're letting me have ya' like this? when you know you're perfectly capable to get a one-up on me?" miguel raised an eyebrow at you, stopping his moving hips as soon as he hit the deepest part of your cunt. he bit his lip hard and stared down at you, his hands on both sides of your head.

"think you like getting treated like this. think this is exactly how 'm gonna teach you to be nice t'me". miguel left pushing his hips upwards, his cock hitting your cervix as your cried against his chest.

"maybe if i treat you like a whore 'stead of my little girl, you'll remember the rules".

(1.) niñita ― little girl

(2.) crees que puedes decirme qué hacer? ― do you think you can tell me what to do?

(3.) sido demasiado amable con mi chica ― been too nice to my girl

(4.) es como aprendes ― it's how you learn

(5.) deja de llorar ― stop crying

#miguel o’hara #across the spiderverse #spiderverse #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara smut #miguel o’hara x reader smut #atsv smut #atsv x you #smut #tw size kink #tw manhandling #no minors please #tw use of miggy LMAOOOO #chubby reader #spanish may be very bad apologies in advance #i failed spanish in senior year ;(#this is very lackluster but it's miguel so forgive me a lil?#✧ ― liyah's loves #female reader

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consciouschunkofmoss · 2 years

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just vcu3n ueyzbxxyvehzveuz3vxgu xubrxuve

i swear to god if i hear one more racist joke ill fucking explode to bits cxbd in3yxb3gsjbehs

#sorry about this #i just hate yt ppl sometimes #and by yt ppl i mean my friend #who i love very much but still manages to be such a fucking asshole when it comes to making jokes about me and other classmates #like #bestie just because some ppl dont care about it doesnt mean youre allowed to talk like a bitch and joke around #literally on the verge of screaming #i want to address this properly with him but honestly is it even worth it #hes dumb. hes a teenager. and yeah these types of ppl like him do shitty stuff #but also i just wished hed notice how fucking livid this makes me without leading me into a 20 minute rant about it #just #idk man maybe im being a bit too fucked up #but i just got fed up with the racist and nazi jokes everyone at class has been throwing around #its not funny #yet everyone acts like its just. ok #its not fucking funny to me #it hurts beyond fucking measure #and no matter how much i say i dont want to be involved or that i dont like this type of shit they just keep doing it over and over again #im so tired #(also jeez uh. if you want me to tag this please let me know. im so sorry)

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raenef · 4 years

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How the fuck does a bard do less damage than a healer? A person WHO MAINS BARD. KNOWS THE HADES EX FIGHT, DID CONSISTENTLY LESS FUCKING DAMAGE THAN THE GOD DAMN HEALERS. Jesus fuck learn how to play your class maybe, DO MORE THAN JUST YOUR DOTS?? Like I’m saying to fucking parse at 99%, i sure as hell never will but DO MORE THAN THE HEALER.

God and apparently no one wanted to say anything because they’d get upset

[screams]

#rae babbles #this was beyond then just being bad at the game #this was pure laziness of not using their skills #at ALL #i would understand parsing that low if it was our first time but it wasn't #we knew the fight #also yes im ranting here because his fc mates follow me on twitter lmao #also it doesnt help that this dude kinda rubs me the wrong way as well #I SAY LESS THAN A HEALER BUT HE DID WAAAY LESS THAN A HEALER #healer did 12 he did 8 #i did 19 and the highest did 22 #thats how fucking low it is #I'm LIVID #i like his fc mates and im in the fc on my alt but oof

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adonis-koo · 2 years

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wicked • 8

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 11k

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Note: ahhhh!!! im so excited chapter 8 is finally here!! let me know how you guys feel about it and thank you so much for reading!

“We’re doing everything we can but...I’m sorry, it’s just too soon to say she’ll be okay.”

All Jungkook saw was red. He was so livid he couldn’t even speak, Taehyung had looked beyond apologetic and in disbelief himself earlier that day before he had re-entered your room once more.

Jungkook’s duties had been abandoned and whatever previous anger and resentment he had towards you was quickly replaced by a new anger of how unbelievably reckless you could be! Did you not understand who you were? What you meant to this country? Jungkook leaned against the wall trying to calm himself as he rubbed his forehead.

True not everyone had been the most kind to you but to go against his orders and put your own life in danger...had he not realized you had disobeyed him you would’ve…! Just the thought had his jaw clenched, when you woke up you were certainly going to have hell to pay from him…

If you woke up.

That’s what Taehyung had said. Jungkook’s anger dulled as his head thudded against the wall, closing his tired eyes. If you woke up.

He sighed as his body sank back against the wood, it had been nearly two hours but they still wouldn’t let him into the room yet to see you. After he had gotten you to the castle all of the Seers had shooed him from the room saying he was being too hot headed and he hadn’t been allowed back in ever since.

The only other person in the hallway was the other person you knew dearly. Wheein was standing against the other wall, her eyes not leaving the floor and he knew she was deeply disturbed at the news of the princess.

A sharp inhale from her drew his eyes to her figure that now trembled before she ushered softly, “I’m so sorry your Highness, if I had gotten to her in time…”

Jungkook didn’t speak for a moment before he relented, a puff escaping his nose as he shook his head with a mutter, “It isn’t your fault Jung, she’s stubborn and bullheaded, I should’ve taken her back myself.”

Wheein’s lips twisted into a sorrowful frown as she sighed, lowering his head out of apology and respect as she spoke, “I’m sorry if this is out of line your Highness but...I firmly believe the Princess truly wanted to help…” Wheein paused for a moment before her voice softened, “...If you gave her a chance, you’d see it. She’s just as kind as they say, if not even more so.”

Jungkook said nothing in return, his eyes cast out over the window at the end of the hallway, he didn’t need to give you a chance to see who you were, flecks of your true personality had already shone on their own, even if they were in bits and pieces.

And that’s what made Jungkook even more angry, angry at himself. It was easier to hate you when you didn’t care what anyone here thought of you, when you disregarded him and his nation, when you said horrible, cruel words out of your own misery.

But you had grown past those days and Jungkook felt stuck. How could he move past it when he was made to sit and watch what he wanted as a future pass him by? But it was getting harder and harder to resent you with each passing day, and this situation was no different.

Why couldn’t you just go back to the castle? Why couldn’t you be a prideful, vain Princess who would never dare dirty herself for a peasant? Why couldn’t you be indignant and not care because after all, Penumbra wasn’t your home.

Jungkook had so many questions and yet his head was only filled with more and more.

Such as, despite Penumbra not being your home, and despite how you had been treated by the court, by him, you still plunged yourself into a life threatening situation to help his people.

Jungkook’s mind was restless for most the night until the doors opened, the Seers filing out one by one as the High Seer bowed to Jungkook causing him to stand straighter, his eyes brooding as ever but nobody could mistake the way his expression shifted subtly as they snapped in worry towards the door.

“She’ll be okay.”

Jungkook’s shoulders visibly slumped as he groaned softly in relief as he rubbed his face, the High Seer continued on, “You may stay with her now, I will have Taehyung return first thing in the morning to tend to her wounds, let us know if anything changes during the night.”

Jungkook nodded as his gaze lowered in respect, “...Thank you.” They all bowed once more, Taehyung’s eyes lingering on him in silent apology once more before he passed the man by.

“Get some sleep Jung.” Jungkook’s eyes flickered over to Wheein who had paused from her hurried steps towards the room. Her lips parting in objection weakly but Jungkook could see how tired she was much like himself, “I know you’re concerned,” He pushed himself off the wall, “But it’s late and you have duties to attend tomorrow, I’ll stay with her.”

Wheein’s lips crumpled as she sighed, perhaps knowing he was right as she gave a small curtsey, “Very well m’lord. Please…” Wheein paused as her eyes lingered tenderly on the door, “Take care of her.”

Jungkook said nothing as she left and it was now only himself in the hallway, Jungkook paused in front of the door somewhat hesitantly. Your words still prominent in his head ‘I’d rather you just stay away from me until you’re ready to move forward’ Jungkook’s eyes had suddenly found your body, sunken into the bed where you laid down unconscious.

Anger once again simmered beneath his skin as he trudged into the room, shutting the door behind him as he muttered, “You’re so selfish for a selfless person.” He ungratefully yanked out a chair from the small round table beside your bed as he sat down, his glare scathing as he stared down at your stupid pretty face.

“It’s barely been two weeks since that stupid argument and here I am,” Jungkook leaned back in his chair, his eyes still cut as they went from your face to your neck, trailing your collarbones before down to your hands which had been wrapped thoroughly in bandages.

Jungkook inhaled sharply as he looked away, “I should’ve took you back myself,” Flecks of regret could be heard in his tone as he set his forearms on his knee��s his head bowed down as he sighed, “...I know we’ve had our differences but I never said I wanted you dead or that I still wanted to marry her, that I didn’t want to get along with you…”

Jungkook sighed as he finally scooted his chair a little closer to your bed, resting his arms on the soft duvet as he laid his head against his arms, staring at those thick lashes that gently brushed along your cheeks, “How am I supposed to hate you when you’ve already given so much of yourself away to prove your dedication to learning our way of life?” It was mumbled and tired and Jungkook’s eyes were failing to stay open.

The question more to himself than you, after all, he was the one that had made an oath to himself to hate you for the rest of his days. Jungkook could see and acknowledge he said a lot of hurtful and bitter things in his own hate.

But that never meant he wanted to see you get hurt…

He could only hope you would wake up soon.

Those were his last thoughts as he slowly drifted to sleep.

The first thing you felt was a dull ache in your head and the second was the dry, burnt twinge in your mouth that tasted of ash, it had you wheezing immediately as your eyes slowly opened to the blurry world around you, at first you saw two of everything as your eyes slowly closed into darkness once more.

Voices sounded muffled at first but became more clear as your eyes opened to a more clear vision once more, you attempted to resituate yourself briefly but a sharp throb of pain flooded the palms of your hand at even the slightest attempt to wiggle your fingers.

The tips of your fingers throbbing in a horrid aching pain that caused a whimper to escape you.

“Don’t hurt yourself anymore.” It was a stern voice that called out to you, but it’s touch the very opposite- tenderly holding your wrist as it set it back against your stomach. Finally your eyes fluttered open one last time to the sight of your ceiling greeting you and the person staring down at you was none other than your own husband.

Jungkook’s eyes looked more tired then you remembered and his hair looked disheveled as it hadn’t been properly brushed in a few days. He said nothing for a long moment as he stared down at you, attempting to speak was almost useless.

Your throat hurt like hell. It ached and burned and the sound of this Jungkook had leaned away from you only for a cup to meet your lips, “Drink.” It wasn’t a suggestion.

Your eyes closed at the liquid relief met on your tongue as you took a few gulps, the immediate pain of your throat had vanished as you sighed in relief, slumping back down against the pillow.

You felt so tired, as if your entire body had exhausted all of it’s energy and it would surely never return, turning your head you got a decent look at Jungkook’s figure, he was not only tired and disheveled looking but his clothes were ruffled and his jacket had hung from his chair as if he had been sitting a long while, “Jungkook…” You finally mumbled out, your eyes searching his but you just couldn’t get anything else out.

Jungkook puffed a breath from his nose, leaning back against the bed as he shook his head, “...I told myself I was gonna give you hell when you woke up.” His calloused fingertips brushed along your cheek making your eyes tiredly shut, had his voice always been so soft and dulcet?

“But now I’m just thankful you’re awake. Rest, the others will be here soon.”

And so you did, your mind slipping soundly back into unconsciousness at the feeling of his fingers tenderly trail down your jawline.

The next time you woke up, light had streamed through the room and Jungkook was no longer by your side, Wheein was the first at your side among many people in your room, her eyes looked relieved as she spoke, “Oh m’lady! I’m so happy you’re awake!” She ushered as you groaned slightly, “Oh, here, let me help you sit up. I’m sure you’re tired of laying down.”

With the help of Wheein and many pillows, you were propped to sit up, but even the slightest attempt to use your hands had you yelping out catching everyone’s attention in the room.

Managing to sit up right you now had a good look at the thick cloth bandages that covered your hands that trembled as you looked down at them, “What….I...what happened?” You were almost too frightened to speak as your lips trembled, looking up at Wheein at a loss of words.

“That’s what we had hoped you’d be able to tell us,” It was the familiar voice of Taehyung who spoke, he was towards the back of the room by your vanity, rather with many tools, currently holding a mortar and pestle.

Your lips twisted into a lost frown as you desperately looked around towards Wheein before towards the Seers and then you met his gaze, Jungkook had been quietly talking to a lower Seer by the doors of the room who had been watching you silently.

“...I…” You felt at a loss of words and no amount of description could accurately describe how much shame suddenly coiled into your entire being as your gaze lowered, “...I’m sorry...I don’t remember much…”

“I know I helped some people and...I think I lifted something…?” Your lips began to tremble as you stared down at your hands, the gravity of the situation hitting you and it felt as though a lump had formed in your throat as you looked back up to Jungkook.

His expression didn’t look pleasant at all, his jaw clenched at your words as you mumbled, “All I really remember after entering the fire was...ash and smoke and…”

You close your eyes, unable to even finish your sentence at the jarring memory that entered your mind, sharply inhaling you tried to calm yourself, the image would be forever seared into your head. It was like a true horror watching chunks of flesh dangling from your hand, blood covering your fingertips.

That was the only thing you could remember, everything else felt as if a thick cloud of fog hung over those memories, just the realization made tears sting your eyes as you mumbled, “Everything is just...blank aside from that.”

Jungkook made a noise of what you could only assume was frustration, running a hand through his hair as he looked even more angry then before, excusing himself from the room as he obviously didn’t want to be around you any longer. Or he just simply couldn’t stand too.

Taehyung sat down on the side of your bed, placing a wooden tray in your lap causing you to jump at the sharp sting in your right thigh, “Sorry Princess, you have a pretty severe burn on your right thigh and a more mild one on your left.”

His words nearly fell on deaf ears though as you stared at the closed door of your room, Taehyung offered a comforting smile, “...He’s upset,” He spoke softly, grabbing the basin off your nightstand as he began to pour water in.

“...I can tell.” You mumbled, trying to swallow that lump which only formed harder and harder in your throat, “I….” The words felt like they were stuck in your throat as you forced them out barely above a whisper, “I was only trying to help…”

The longer you were awake the more shame began to cast over you at how stupid you were to try and help when all you did was clearly make things worse, and on top of that you couldn’t even remember what had happened, not really. You had some fuzzy moments of when you had first followed behind the man. But everything just melded together into your head in one pile of ash.

“You misunderstand his emotions Princess,” Taehyung frowned softly as he held up your wrists tenderly, “I can’t speak for the Prince but I can tell you this, you’ve been unconscious for two days and he didn’t leave that chair once the entire time, all of his duties were cast aside, his meetings and trainings were put on hold. He wouldn’t even so much as leave the hall when we were first tending to you. The Prince is upset because he was worried you wouldn’t make it.”

You couldn’t find the words to speak as you sucked in a harsh breath of air, shaking your head silently as Taehyung finally offered you a smile, “I think...and don’t tell him this but...I think Jungkook has become rather fond of you, in his own way...And I think he didn’t realize it until you were in danger. Now...you may want to look away…”

Taehyung carefully unwrapped your hands and you’d be lying if you said the fresh air didn’t feel good but the sight was just as Taehyung said.

You could feel a knot forming in your throat at the sight in front of you, your eyes stinging with tears at just the sight.

Your hands you had prided yourself on for so many years, the same hands that had helped heal many during the war when there wasn’t enough healers during your younger years, the ones which helped replant the flora in the meadow when a fire had broke loose, the very same hands which you painted in celebration for the festival of flowers….

Almost all the skin had been burned off the palms of your hands and the skin around the wound was charred and grotesque, blisters had begun to form and the skin of your fingers were peeling and painfully blistered.

“I’m so stupid.” You couldn’t even stop the tears if you had tried, conviction and regret buried in your stomach as you softly wept, squeezing your eyes shut as warm tears trickled down your cheeks in mourning.

“Ah- it’s going to feel better once your put it in,” Taehyung spoke gently as you he grabbed your wrists once more, wincing you cried as he delicately placed them in the water, at first it stung before it began to sooth the blistering heat the still continued to ooze from them.

“I just wanted to help.” You whimpered softly as you shut your eyes, trying to not let yourself choke up on your gentle sobs as you shook your head. You could tell by the looks of everyone in the room that they didn’t get it.

They probably assumed you were crying due to your vanity being marred but they didn’t understand how holy your hands were supposed to be to you. And you ruined them. It felt hard to breathe at just the thought that they’d forever be marred with the acts of your own stupidity.

Your shoulders bounced a little as you closed your eyes, another tear rolling down your cheek as you closed your eyes, trying to relax against the soothing cool water that absorbed the heat from the monstrous sight of your wounds.

“It very well may be that you did help Princess, please don’t be so hard on yourself, we’re still gathering information on what happened and who was able to make it out and who didn’t,” Taehyung frowned and it seemed he might’ve been the only one who had an idea as to why you were so upset, “For now let's focus on getting you healed. This is moon water that’s been blessed by the High Seer, so it’ll help speed up the process but there’s only so much we can do I’m afraid.”

Taehyung sighed as he folded his hands together, “I won’t sit here and lie to you Princess...These burns are...bad.” He lowered his gaze in apology, “They’ll heal as all things do in time but they’ll most likely scar due to the amount of skin you lost.”

Tears began trickling down your face once more at his words, they’d scar…? Surely no one would love you now, you were weighed down by too many things once again. Your entire livelihood was based around your hands, just as many mundane things in life as the more sacred ones.

How could you hand out bread to the children and read stories now? How would you even be able to eat or do something as simple as open a door? You closed your eyes as you silently wept once more.

You had felt many things as you adjusted to your life in Penumbra, but this was the first time you had felt truly defeated.

“I need to make the salve for your wounds, it’ll create a protective barrier to keep an infection from starting or spreading and it should help the skin rebuild faster. Leave your hands in the moon water for now, okay? We’ll do this every morning and every evening. And I’ll need to change your bandages three times a day as well.”

You could only nodded as you sniffled in acceptance as you mumbled a small ‘thank you’ to him.

Wheein’s lips quivered and she could no longer stand seeing you in such a state- for your own sadness was hers as well as she collapsed at your bedside, “My lady I can’t apologize enough... If I had just been more diligent then this surely wouldn’t have happened.”

With watery eyes you shook your head as you lowered your gaze, “This is nobody’s fault but my own Wheein, I would’ve done something stupid regardless of your influence. It’s how I’ve always been.” You mumbled bitterly, what could have possibly been worth this outcome…?

“I’m sorry m’lady,” Wheein frowned sadly, wishing she could do something more to help you, folding her hands as she lowered her head, “Here, i’ll fetch you breakfast, I’m sure you're hungry.” She stood up, giving a small courtesy before exiting the room where Jungkook had reentered.

“How does it look today?” Jungkook straightened up as he asked Taehyung, his eyes flickering from him to your hands soaking.

“Just as bad,” Taehyung wrinkled his nose as he mixed ingredients in his mortar and mashed with his pestle, “Go, take a look.” He then whispered something to Jungkook you couldn't make out but it made Jungkook raise his brows before looking at you once more, except this time noticing the defeated tear streaks on your cheeks.

Something about having those piercing blue eyes on you made you well up, stubbornly looking at the tray of water feeling somewhat indignant otherwise you’d surely burst into tears once more.

Jungkook clacked his tongue as he walked over before sitting back down in his chair with a sigh, “Let me look.”

“They look just as ugly as the last time you saw them.” You sniffled as you swished your hands in the water a little away from him. You bolded up more, not wanting to look at him in such a pitiful state. In any other time in your life you had something going for you.

You could stand up and speak your mind, you could quite literally walk away from a situation you did not like and now you could do nothing. You couldn’t even so much as defend yourself with a push if you needed too. Everything, even breathing to an extent hurt and exhibited too much energy for you to do it for very long.

“Don’t be so theatrical,” Jungkook lightly chided you as you made a noise of disagreement, refusing to look at him still as he spoke, “They aren’t ugly, they’re healing. Now stop being so stubborn and let me see.”

You had noted the slight defensiveness in Jungkook’s tone- not at you but at the way you had referred to yourself. He reached over, grabbing your wrists with a surprisingly tender touch as he pulled them close, standing up so he could get a better view as he turned them over in the water making it ripple gently.

You only briefly saw them before you closed your eyes. Just the brief sight was enough to cause tears to gloss in your eyes again as you squeezed them, making new tears roll down your cheeks. This was so embarrassing.

You knew Jungkook was right, you didn’t need to be like this, but you couldn’t help but feel so exposed- vulnerable, especially to him which everyone including you both knew- you didn’t have what most would describe as a good relationship.

Jungkook after a moment of inspection turned them back over to have the backs of your hands face up before sitting back down, “They aren’t nearly as red as before and the swelling has gone down,” He poked his cheek with his tongue as his eyes landed on your face once more, your shoulders slightly bobbing as you tried to not cry aloud.

“...You’re so pitiful.” Jungkook’s previously hard expression slowly melted as he sighed softly, you couldn’t see his face but it was fairly obvious in Taehyung’s opinion that he felt bad for you.

Pulling the handkerchief out of his back pocket he leaned in.

You jolted a little, instinctively pulling away from him until you realized what he was doing. If Jungkook had any sort of embarrassment of his own he certainly knew how to keep it hidden as he began to wipe the tears from your face.

In fact, you weren’t even sure Jungkook thought anything of this at all as he began to lightly chide you once more, “Be thankful there isn’t an infection, healing takes time but they aren’t permanently damaged.”

“That we know of for now.” Taehyung replied as he grinded down the herbs in his mortar.

That they knew off!?

You couldn’t even help the choked sob that escaped your lips, your shoulders crumpling as you once again tried to hold it together. Taehyung immediately looked sheepishly anywhere but at Jungkook’s icy eyes that shot up with an unappreciative glare.

Was it possible that you wouldn’t be able to use your hands even after they healed!?

Jungkook immediately scooted closer looking only slightly awkward which made Taehyung try to hold in a snort.

Jungkook sighed, somewhat reluctant on what to do besides dabbing your tears once more. He was never good with words and even worse when it came to women when they needed some form of comfort. It was even worse when they needed both.

Instead Jungkook settled for what he’d say to anyone, “Your hands will be fine. The Seers will make sure of it…” Jungkook’s gaze became cold as he glared at Taehyung who had caused this, “Right?” His eyes were nearly as cold as the tundra in winter.

Taehyung coughed a little, ducking a little as if that would ward off the man’s underlying threat as he hurriedly chirped a confirmation, “Right!”

The door opened once more along with the wafting smell of food that had your stomach immediately growling, Wheein came in with a smile as she set the tray down beside you as your lips quivered once more, she even made sure to get you a blueberry scone but...You couldn’t even eat it yourself...

Your lips quivered as your trail of tears started once more.

Jungkook inhaled sharply as he tried to keep himself patient, dear god he had never seen a woman cry this much in his life, “Hush,” He said sternly, wiping your tears once more before setting his handkerchief down, sighing as his expression melted a little, “All these tears won’t fix the state you’re in.”

Wheein stared at him as he met her gaze briefly and it was like they were having a conversation all on their own where Wheein gave him the most exasperated look before coughing as she curtseyed and went over to assist Taehyung.

Jungkook poked his tongue in his cheek as he sighed, closing his eyes briefly as he relented, “But I suppose it can’t be helped…”

Jungkook shook his head reluctantly before he picked up the knife and forth, cutting into the blueberry scone before holding it up, “Open.” He commanded quietly, watching your lips quiver as you stared down at the tray of water, this was so humiliating! “I know you’re hungry and I’ve watched you inhale nearly five of these scones daily Y/n. Eat.”

You let your lips part a little and Jungkook took a mile out of your inch as he pushed the metal into your mouth which was met with the tart burst of blueberry as you slowly chewed the pastry. “That was one time.” You mumbled with a sniffle, your lips quivering into a pout as you spoke, “And I’ll have you know it was only three blueberry, the other two were apple.”

Jungkook couldn’t even catch himself before he let a breathy laugh escape his lips as he shook his head at the sight of the pouty puppy like expression on your face as you looked at him, who appeared somewhat amused, “That’s not an excuse for eating nearly the whole platter.”

He spooned you another bite, his brows pressed together a little in concentration as he continued to feed you.

“Not everything needs to be excused. I didn’t say a word when you haven’t spoken to me in two weeks and yet now you’re feeding me a scone.” You replied with a sulking pout, staring back down at the tray of water, knowing that this was probably not something you should talk about right now, let alone in front of Wheein and Taehyung who definitely heard that and were definitely acting like they were ghosts at the moment.

You had thought maybe you had overstepped a line but Jungkook hardly even looked bother has he replied right back, “Well if you hadn’t gone and done something stupid I wouldn’t be having to feed you,” He spoke matter of fact before he resumed your next bite of food, chewing you raised your brows at him as he continued, “And I’ll remind you that I was only doing what you told me to do.”

“Well I’m alive, you don’t have to pretend to be nice anymore.” You sighed in exhaustion as you leaned back against the pillow causing a chuckle from Jungkook.

“Is it so hard to believe I’m looking out for your wellbeing?” Jungkook asked, and it sounded like a sincere question as he scoffed a little, “I may not be thrilled with you, but I don’t want you dead. I don’t know how many times I have to say that. Besides, since when do I need an excuse for looking after my wife who dumbly decided to go against my orders and nearly get herself burned alive?”

His voice came off a little stronger this time showing his now seriousness as you clacked your tongue while mumbling once more, “...I told you I’m not one of your soldiers. And when did you ever tell me that? Because I just assumed you probably did want me dead.” You curved a brow at him.

“Well that’s your own presumption. I told you when you decided to go drink at a tavern without an escort,” Jungkook replied with your same tone, “And I had to carry you up six flights of stairs or else you’d surely kill yourself because you were so drunk.” You felt your cheek throb with warmth in embarrassment at the memory as you looked away from him indignantly.

“I hope next time you listen to me,” Jungkook continued to speak despite your silence in hope he’d just shut up, but of course, he knew he was in the perfect position to speak freely without any chance of you getting away now, “Maybe you wouldn’t have to deal with me like you are now.”

You glared at him with a sulky expression, “You truly are wicked.” He pushed another piece of scone into your mouth and for the first time, you had seen from him something you never had.

A smile, an innocent smile that showed off what you realized looked like cute bunny teeth that was the literal opposite of what anyone considered wicked.

He reached out to squish your cheeks causing your expression to get even sulkier, “Y’know princess, you should try to smile a little more, it suits you better then this new sulky expression you keep sporting,”

Was...was he teasing you!? “You look like a sad pathetic puppy right now.”

You tried to lean away from him as you whined, “Just because I’m unable to hit you now doesn’t give you the right to just annoy me! Let alone touch me!” Your cheeks were still squished though and your glare had returned causing him to laugh once more.

“Who would’ve thought when stranded you're just a feisty little puppy.” Jungkook taunted, a challenging twinkle in his eyes and a wicked smirk curling on his lips to match as he gave your cheeks one last squeeze before letting go as you requested.

“That’s not funny!” You puffed indignantly however Jungkook had managed to push a large piece of scone in your mouth this time causing another echo laughter from him at the look on your face as you began to chew ungrateful for his help now.

“Are you finished with that so I can go back to bed and be left alone.” You complained to Taehyung who stood up, still mashing as he spoke, “Yes I’ve been done for about five minutes but I didn’t want to interrupt.”

This now had both you and Jungkook looking away from one another and you swore you caught a laugh from Wheein who walked over with Taehyung to the other side of the bed so they could move freely.

“It’s going to hurt once your hands are removed from the water and it’s going to sting at first with the balm okay?” Taehyung prepped you as Wheein grabbed both sides of the tray, sucking in a breath of air you gave a small nod while in preparation.

Lifting your hands out of the water you closed your eyes, deciding that you didn’t want to watch any of this, you could feel the tray lifted off your lap before another pair of hands guided your arms to lower back against the cloth with your palms facing up.

After a second of drying you winced at the inflamed feeling burning back into your palms as you whined in discomfort, fingers tenderly ran against your neck in comfort causing you to immediately lean against the hand in comfort before you felt the balm applied. It was alright at first but then the stinging immediately kicked in causing a loud yelp from you, “Ah fuck!” You yelped, squeezing your eyes even tighter shut as you growled, “You said it was only going to sting!”

“If I said it was going to hurt you would’ve cried again and no offense but I don’t want my head on a platter tonight Your Highness.” Taehyung replied as he continued putting the balm on the other head, your eyes however were already welling with tears in pain, “This is killing off anything bad that could’ve entered the wounds, it’s painful but necessary. We can start wrapping now so it’ll begin to soothe once we get the burns dressed.”

You whined in pain as you felt the resume of fingers running against your neck once more in reassurance and a thumb rubbing tenderly just below the start of your jaw as Taehyung began dressing your hands loosely and carefully wrapped your fingers, “Alright, finished!”

Wheein and Taehyung backed off of you as you collapsed back in bed as you sighed, opening your eyes as you felt relieved to see your wounds were dressed once more, “I’ll have Wheein tend to your wounds on your lower body unless…” He coughed a little, making you frown as you tilted your head, “If you’d prefer his Highness do it then.”

“No!” You immediately barked out causing Jungkook to snort, “No I do not.”

“You don’t have anything I haven’t seen before, princess.” Jungkook said, making you snort in return, why did this man act as if he even wanted to see your body when you knew for a fact he didn’t.

“Then you won’t feel like you haven’t missed out.” You replied back sorely, making Jungkook hold up his hands in surrender as he stood up.

“Someone’s feeling prickly today.” He commented, making you glare at his broad back as he grabbed his coat, “I have business to catch up on, I’ll be back later.”

“The nerve.” You puffed as you rolled your eyes, something he hasn’t already seen before…! How dare that man even simplify your body to nothing more than just an object!

Taehyung chuckled as he gave a bow, “I’ll leave you and Wheein to it, it won’t be nearly as painful with your lesser burns, that being said somebody will be here to assist and keep you company throughout your days while you are unable to help yourself. I will be back later as well, Your Highness.”

With that he departed as well, closing his door on the way out.

Wheein had pulled the covers off your bed as you winced a little frowning at the sight as she pulled the nightgown all the way up to your hips as you groaned, “...he’s lying isn’t he?” This burn wasn’t nearly as horrific as yours hands but it was still pretty bad.

Wheein offered a sympathetic smile, “It can’t be as painful as what you just experienced so that’s better m’lady?”

You leaned back as you closed your eyes once more, letting her begin to apply the balm as you winced, “Can you do that thing again…? Please…? You mumbled, feeling a little childish at the silly request but you loved physical touch, it was a love language you had always shared with your mother.

“Do what?” Wheein asked as she continued to carefully spread it over the large burn that covered most of your thigh.

“Rub my neck…” You sighed intending to cover your face with your hands only to realize that was no longer possible only making you try and look away from her as much as possible.

Wheein was silent for a while before it became mildly uncomfortable causing you no other choice than to look at her as she stared at you.

Her mouth was quirked in a weird way as if she was trying to fight off both a laugh and a smile, “My lady, that was your husband who did that.”

“...What…”

The day hadn’t been too terrible, besides the occasional check in with Wheein you mainly slept throughout the whole day until it became dark out, the worst part of your day only included having the balm Taehyung made reapplied with each time he changed your dressing but admittedly it did make quite the difference compared to before.

Outside of that you mainly slept not only out of tiredness but out of a futile attempt to block out the guilt the nearly ate you alive at how you let your own hands get to the state they were in. You had nobody to blame but yourself. To say you were upset...was an understatement, and thus, you chose to sleep as it wasn’t as if you could do anything to let out your own frustration.

Taehyung and Wheein made no comments the entire time your hands bathed in the cool water, if you closed your eyes and pretended you hadn’t ruined them it could even be considered soothing.

As if sensing your inner distress neither said anything outside bidding their goodnights before they left for the night and of course Wheein had told you to just call for her if you needed anything at all during the night.

Watching the door shut you finally crumpled against your pillows as you sighed, letting your head relax against the headboard. You had specifically told them you’d manage to lay yourself down with any help and though Wheein looked doubtful she had figured it wasn’t worth a fight.

Looking down at the wrapped wounds you scoffed, feeling the lingering knot in your throat come back as you shook your head.

How could you be so careless?

Words couldn’t even describe how you felt with yourself, so many things ran through your mind in anxiety as you sucked in a harsh breath, the only thing you could think however- was that it was a good thing you were already married.

Just the thought made a somewhat bitter laugh escape you at the realization. Out of all the things you could think of- that was the first. Your smile slowly melted off your face into a more dim one as you sighed. It was the truth though, nobody would want damaged goods. That’s all you were after all- something to be sold off just like you were during your wedding.

It was as if the very person who lingered on your mind could sense your thoughts, much to your surprise your door was opened to reveal him. Jungkook was true to his word. When he hadn’t come around by afternoon you had just assumed he was too busy and assumed when he said he’d be back; that he was just lying.

Clearly he wasn’t.

He was in his nightwear, loose pants and the white button shirt that cut low on his chest that parted free of any confinement, “Well don’t look at me like that.” He snorted but you couldn’t help the way your nose wrinkled at the sight of him.

“You couldn’t make the time to visit during the day? I’m getting ready to sleep.” Your hands rested in your lap as you curled a little away from his figure that sat in the chair that was still placed at your bedside.

“I was busy.” Jungkook replied, his gaze neutral as he spoke, “And while I know you love sleeping your days away we need to discuss Seohyun and the duel.”

Something in your mouth immediately soured at the mention of her. He couldn’t come here sooner to talk about this? Your jaw clenched a little as you looked away from him, “This couldn’t wait for the morning?”

The sharpness in your words didn’t surpass Jungkook as his brows furrowed, not making that look on his face any less firm, if anything it only made him look somewhat defensive, “No it couldn’t. In case you forgot there’s less than a week left before you were supposed to fight her and you can’t in this state.”

“Well then what’s there to discuss?” You finally sighed as you looked back at Jungkook, your patience wearing thin and you were tired, and you really didn’t give a damn about Seohyun right now, she was the last thing on your mind and while yes some of your worries were about her and what to do, Jungkook was right about one thing, “If it’s mutually agreed I’m useless now, what is there to discuss other then we have to call off the duel? If this was your only reason to visit me then you can go.”

Jungkook’s expression didn’t change- in fact you’d even say he looked somewhat offended beneath that cold veneer he put on, “Don’t pretend like you’d want my company outside this, and you aren’t useless-”

“I am!” You snapped out cutting him off, the abrupt sharpness in your voice had stopped him right in his tracks as you gritted your teeth in anger, “I can’t even feed myself right now! So don’t lie to me about that in some attempt to make me feel better!”

There was an undeniable quiver in your lips as your shoulders crumpled in defeat, tears glossing your eyes as you mumbled, “...I’m so tired of fighting Jungkook. If this is all we’re going to do, please just...go. I asked you before to not talk to me when you were sorting through your feelings and-”

You let out a yelp at fingers digging into your chin, yanking your face to look up at him, Jungkook was now leaned over, those icy blue eyes drilling into yours as he spoke quietly, “This has nothing to do with her. Obviously I need to make this very clear to you Y/n, so don’t make me repeat myself,” Jungkook’s expression didn’t change as he continued, “I’m here because I chose to be here. Because I wanted to see you, Seohyun’s duel was only the first thing I wanted to discuss. I figured it was already clear to you what my decision was given you’re still here alive.”

Jungkook stared at you for a long second, waiting for your reply but it didn’t come, your eyes only shut with more tears as he tucked his tongue into his cheek, finally sighing as he let go of your chin, sitting back down in his chair.

There was a long awkward pause as you continued to sniffle and Jungkook couldn’t bare to sit in the silence any longer as he let out a long sigh, finally relenting as his expression melted into something more along hesitancy as he spoke, “...You said you wanted to set aside our differences to understand one another…”

He scratched his neck as he spoke, now refusing to look directly at you, “...I’m not a man good with words, and I’m certainly not good with women and their feelings on top of it, but...I thought a lot about what you said and what you’ve done.” Jungkook’s eyes finally flickered back to you again as you sniffled, rubbing the back of hand to wipe your tears, “...I’m well aware that I’ve been unfair and cruel in the past, putting you under expectations you don’t know how to uphold or even know where to begin learning.”

“What I’m trying to say is,” Jungkook sighed briefly, “...I’m sorry,” He scratched his cheek, his eyes now averted once more, “I know I come across callous but I try to be considerate, and while I haven’t shown it to you per say, I’m more inclined to trying now then I was when we first married.”

“For someone who says he isn't good with words you talk a lot.” You sniffled with a mumble as you sat back against your pillows, trying your best to pretend as if all of his words weren’t flustering you even further.

“It’s to make up for the fact that I’m not.” Jungkook snorted briefly, “Crying women put me on edge. So I’ll keep talking until you stop.”

This earned a small but brief smile from you as you sniffled once more shaking your head as the expression slowly melted off your face, your eyes somberly looking at him as you sighed wistfully, “I’m not...I’m not crying because of you Jungkook...I’m just angry, at myself, at the world. At everything...How much do you know about Eunoia?”

It was a soft spoken question as you peered at him somewhat shy, Jungkook looked as if he hadn’t expected the question as he cocked his head a little, a frowning setting on his face as he shrugged a little, “Not much, we don’t accept any imported goods from other countries, so our information is very limited on other nations unless it is relevant to civil affairs.”

You managed to wiggle yourself closer to the edge of the bed as you sighed, trying to figure out where to start as you lowered your gaze a little, “...In Eunoia, we’re reverent to the Earth for springing forth life from it’s force. Everything has a soul, a story to tell. Every tree and flower, the butterflies and rabbits, down to each person which walks in our land. They say it's because our ancestors- the Dryads were birthed from the roots of the tallest oaks and that’s why we’re so connected with nature.”

Jungkook sat quietly, listening to you intently but you felt a little nervous, he wasn’t the most expressive person.

“So how do we tend to nature? How do we water it’s grass and feed it’s dirt? With our hands.” You held up your own, offering a weak smile as you gestured Jungkook, he looked a little confused before he somewhat cautiously held out his hand to you.

You set it against your lap as you offered a small smile, tracing his pinky with the faintest of touch in an attempt to not disturb the dull ache your burns had continued, “The number 5 in my nation, is said to bring good luck, it’s because we have five fingers. The pinky represents innocence and oaths.”

His hand was big, much bigger than your own and in fact, you were positive he could’ve crushed your own hand at any given moment if he so desired, but Jungkook now looked curious, leaned in forward a little as his eyes kept on his own hand as you continued to trace against it, “The ring finger represents love and compassion as well as vows to be kept. And the middle finger represents righteous anger and courage.”

Your lips briefly pulled into a smile as you recalled your earliest memories, your own mother tracing your hand as she had explained the belief of 5 to you as a child, “The index finger represents moving forward and luck. And your thumb represents strength and endurance.”

You paused as your lips began to coil into a frown as your fingers tenderly touched against the palm of his hand which was calloused thoroughly and rough, “But the palm of one’s hand is the most important and sacred of all, it’s what allows you to use all five to gift to others. For how can you promise another without it’s stead? To hold another's hand without it’s grip? To fight without it’s honor? To push your obstacles aside without it’s help? To hold without dropping?”

Your face was now somber as you lowered your gaze, almost shamefully, “Hands are the giver of life to Eunoian’s, they’re so special; because how can we continue our traditions and livelihoods without them? How do we help those in need if we cannot help ourselves? How do we prune away the rot in the plants, dig in the soil, give life to what once gave life to us without them?”

Your eyes were closed as you felt the warm wet tears slide down your cheeks in mourning as you tried to steady your voice, “So you understand, yes? What it means to me that I destroyed them…It’s utterly shameful in Eunoia to have hands scarred like this, especially intentionally...”

Jungkook sighed softly, his eyes had become soft at your state and he hadn’t realized just what you were feeling internally until this moment, “You haven’t destroyed your hands,” He tutted somewhat exasperatedly, he grabbed your wrists as he held them up making you look at him, “Did Taehyung say you destroyed your hands?”

“Well no-”

“That you’d never be able to use them after this?”

“No-”

“That you will forever be seen as useless.”

“N-no…”

Jungkook’s gaze was steely- but it was different this time, his expression was intimidating, it was...almost reassuring though to someone who had never met him- they might not be able to tell the differences, “You told me how Eunoia see’s this. So let me tell you what Penumbrian’s see it as,” Jungkook’s grip tightened a little on your wrist as he spoke, “Much like swordsmanship is revered here, scars are an inevitable fate for all of us.”

“It’s accepted as a process of learning the way of the blade, and especially to us who have fought in the wars. So when you are scarred, it’s not seen as something disgusting by us,” Jungkook’s gaze didn’t falter, “It’s seen as a celebration, a story. A moment of honor which you earned by sacrificing a small part of yourself. Glory comes in all shapes and sizes in scars,” Jungkook finally sighed as his grip softened a little on your wrist, “I’m sure....our ways are very different from yours...but you’re a Penumbrian Princess now, I won’t tell you what to let go of and what to keep, but just remember that we will never judge you for this. Not my people nor me.”

Your lips quivered a little as your eyes rested on your hands, trying to not let your eyes gloss as you mumbled, “...I don’t regret what I did, I would never turn away someone who needed help...I just wish I had thought about what that might cause…”

Jungkook sighed as he finally leaned back in his chair as he spoke solemnly, “I know.” He was far different from the love you had once known in Seokjin, by far, Jungkook was a world apart from him. But two little words somehow made the world of difference for you.

The next few days had went by slowly and they were filled with monotony aside from occasional visits from Taehyung to check on your hands and Wheein checking in on you to make sure you were okay.

And of course, your husband. He had made an appearance to see you at least once a day but he had admitted to you yesterday that he had fallen behind on work and was having to make up for it as of- whilst briefly mentioning his father who wasn’t happy about it. But he hadn’t lingered on the subject long enough for you to ask any questions.

If there was one thing you were considered- resilient would be what you’d say. There was little to nothing you could do on your own but with enough boredom you eventually found a way to read.

Your hands were burned severely and your fingers oozed with blisters which Taehyung had regretfully informed you would take another couple of days at least to go away, but the one part of your hands which weren’t burned were the sides.

This was important information because this was how you managed to get a book into your lap, your eyes curiously drifting over each sentence before you turned the page with the side of your thumb. It wasn’t easy by any means but it wasn’t like you didn’t have all day.

Speaking of- it was mid day and eventually Taehyung would return to soak your hands one last time before wrapping them for the night. You sighed as you glanced out of your window, lips quirking as sadness sunk into your chest.

It was a bright sunny day and you couldn’t even go outside to enjoy it.

You technically could but you had so many burns Taehyung had been worried the sun’s rays might make them worse and you truly weren’t in much walking condition, even more so if you couldn’t do anything about it.

Shaking your head warily you decided to focus on your book once more, it wasn’t the most thrilling topic but it was definitely interesting to read how Penumbra rose to the wealth they had between their limited goods they exported- which made them extremely increased in value do to the quality craft. Not only this but smithing and metal work itself was also included in this as well.

“You’re going to hunch permanently if you read like that.”

You jolted, your book fell out of your lap as you scrambled in effort to catch it before letting out a frustrated whine at the sight of it hitting the ground. You looked up ungratefully at Jungkook’s figure that leaned against the doorway, “You could’ve knocked!” You whined out as you kicked your feet in frustration, “Now I can’t pick it up!”

“You shouldn’t have even tried using your hands to begin with. In case you needed to be reminded; your hands are still extremely fragile,” Jungkook chastised lightly as he walked into the room, closing the door behind him before leaning down to pick up the book, sitting on the edge of the bed as he looked at the title, “Penumbra’s claim to wealth…?” His eyes furrowed as if somewhat confused as he glanced at you.

You had nothing to be embarrassed about, after all you had much to learn about Penumbra but for some reason, being confronted with Jungkook on the subject still made you squirm, even if you were getting on better with him these last few days then you had the three months you had been married.

Your face immediately burned in embarrassment and had it not been for your hands you would’ve snatched the book from him, “...I’m trying to understand how Penumbra’s wealth came to be and what they use to keep the wealth in their kingdom.” You mumbled before deciding to redirect the conversation, not wanting to be questioned on this, “What did Seohyun say…? About the duel?”

You weren’t thrilled about mentioning her in conversation but Jungkook had told you yesterday that due to the state you were in he would go in your stead to talk to Seohyun about the duel and see if he could postpone it. When you first declined his offer Jungkook was relentless and continued on to mentioned it would be better he do it instead of you and finally after some debate you had gave your blessing though you still didn’t like the idea.

You didn’t want to be seen in the eyes of Seohyun as hiding behind your husband. You could easily face her on your own, though you were dully aware Seohyun probably wasn’t above taking advantage of you while injured. Maybe Jungkook knew this as well and that was why he was so determined.

Jungkook ignored your attempt to lead the conversation elsewhere, his eyes continued to inspect the book as he opened it, “Well for one Penumbra’s wealth isn’t just from our exported goods- Not exactly, we couldn’t rely on that solely since we don’t send much wear out. Our main wealth comes from the mountain and miners who mine the material that create our goods, we had a plot of gold that was struck there back in 12EX and that skyrocketed our overall wealth. It was back after the great war of 11EX when our original kingdom of Seoul was destroyed and Penumbra was brought forth after it.”

He closed the book as you sighed, your lips jutting into a pout at not being able to distract him as you had hoped, he puffed a breath of air, a ghost of smile tugging on his lips before it dropped, “Seohyun refused to change the deadline at first but after some persuasion she’s given another two month for you to prepare. Once you heal you will return to training with me.”

“That was surprisingly easy…?” You furrowed your brows as you hummed, leaning back against the pillows as you silently looked at Jungkook in question.

Jungkook didn’t say anything at first before he eventually shrugged, “I’d just be grateful that she agreed if I were you. She’s not exactly the giving type.”

This made you puff a breath as you set your hands in your lap, “Oh I can tell.” You replied with a snort.

In the beginning of your marriage you had just assumed Jungkook had committed infidelity a handful of times- not with any proof- it was simply what you felt would be in his nature at the time. But the longer you have gotten to know him, the more the idea began to bother you. Especially when Seohyun had made herself known to you. And even more so when it was brought to your attention their relationship was not just one in lust- but in love.

How could you possibly compete with something like that?

“Jungkook,” You hadn’t even meant to call his name but Jungkook’s attention was now on you as he sat down in the chair at your bedside.

Your words felt stuck in your throat at the realization that this was a horrible idea, but you were genuinely curious, the more you thought about Seohyun and Jungkook as a couple, the less sense it made to you.

His brows lifted a little in acknowledgement as you somewhat hesitantly asked, “...May I ask...what made you attracted to Seohyun…? I just…” Your brows pinched as you pressed your lips together, “I mean this in the most inoffensive way possible, but I genuinely have a hard time imagining you both together.”

Jungkook was silent for a long moment and it seemed as if he had been took off guard at your question. Perhaps he had just assumed you’d never ask something like this before. Regardless he wasn’t glaring at you so that had to be a good sign.

Instead Jungkook only looked out the window which was bright with rays of sun, his expression remained the same and he pondered your words for a moment before he spoke, “...I loved her, in the way that I found comfort in somebody I could relate to. We had similar childhoods, the same friend group, we attended the same parties and events. She was the fire that melted my ice-”

He huffed a breath of air- as if he didn’t personally feel this way- as he set his forearms on his knees, “-or at least that’s what many told me. I admired many things about her, her fiery personality was one of them. She was always hot headed growing up,” He rolled his eyes as if memories swam in his mind, “But what I enjoyed- and grew to love the most was her determination to speak up even in situations it was frowned upon. She never let somebody silence her when she felt convicted to say something.”

“Are you saying you never spoke up in those situations?” You pulled one of the many pillows on your bed against you as you hugged in close, setting your chin on it as you tried to imagine him in his former years.

You had a hard time envisioning Jungkook being someone quiet in a situation when he didn’t agree but then again, the more you had gotten to know Jungkook personally, he wasn’t necessarily someone who was highly opinionated. Even so, Jungkook still held a very strong presence even in his silence.

Jungkook pressed his lips together before chuckling lowly as if what you said humored him, “Not per say,” He replied his voice oddly soft as his gaze kept on the window, “But I was often told as a child to not misspeak in a situation I didn’t have permission to do so or the knowledge required to fully understand. It’s different now that I’ve grown into my role, I’ve lived through wars and lead men, I’ve watched my fellow men die in battle and managed to turn the tides in our darkest hours. I gained much experience since then- and I know Seohyun would’ve stayed by my side had they let her go to war with me. But even without all of that, it’s never stopped her from voicing her opinion.”

You found a tiny smile forming on your lips as you spoke, “And that's very nice- but you didn’t answer my question.”

Jungkook huffed a little, as if brought back to reality, though cool blue eyes that never ceased to stand out to you met your own as he shook his head, “You saw me as a child once, what do you make of that? The first time we truly met.”

You had to do a double take as you raised your brows in somewhat surprise, “...You remember that? At Yule?”

You’d be lying to say you weren’t shocked Jungkook remembered that Yule when you both were children, the same memory you had hated when you first wedded Jungkook was now brought back to your mind, the memory of him as a little boy, he had been shorter then you by a few inches back then and he was a small thing truly.

Those eyes of his however were just as unwelcoming back then as they were now though truthfully, still. You do remember the way he had been hiding behind his uncle's legs.

“Well,” Jungkook drew a breath as he finally leaned back in his chair, “Truthfully you were the only one who didn’t seem afraid of me. You kept trying to get me to dance.”

You tilted your head in surprise, “You remember more than I do...All I remember was you continually running away from me.”

“I wasn’t allowed to play with other children during my youth,” Jungkook ushered softly, “Yule was the first time I had been in such a social setting before- I was considerably shy as a child, but even more so when I had been put in that event...Not to mention I thought you…” Jungkook suddenly paused his words, his gaze snapping to you as you frowned.

It was silent for a long moment and finally he sighed, shaking his head, looking somewhat brooding though you didn’t understand.

“Are you okay? Your ears look red…?”

Jungkook’s hands instantly covered his ears briefly as if to hide them as he replied with a somewhat gritted tone, “I’m fine.”

You let out a brief laugh as you raised your brows in amusement. What…? Was this a peak of his own shyness coming out? You didn’t press him because it looked somewhat amusing but rather you decided to save him from it as you asked softly, “You said you weren’t allowed to play other children...why was that?”

Jungkook dropped his hands as he frowned a little, “My father always said it was a distraction and that, I would one day be king and I needed to study and train, it wasn’t until I was older that I was allowed more free time, it was just a few years before I begun my training in the academy for war.”

“But you had to have gotten lonely…” You frowned, “You were a child…”

Jungkook shrugged a little, as if unsure of what to say at the sight of your softened eyes, he looked a bit awkward as he spoke, “I was a shy boy growing up, I preferred my own company over others- I still do if I’m honest. And I did have the other boys that trained alongside me growing up. Such as Jimin and even Hoseok, I wasn’t close to them then, but we grew up together and that in itself has made them irreplaceable to me.”

You smiled tenderly at his words which made Jungkook’s gaze sharpen a little, “Don’t ever tell them I said that. Their ego knows no bounds and I’d rather die than puff it any further for them.”

Amusement was written on your face as you nodded, “Your secret is safe with me. Now are you just going to hold that or are you going to at least do me the favor of reading to me?”

“I’m not a teacher,” Jungkook snorted but nevertheless opened the book, “How have you even managed to read all of this on your own? Better yet, how much do you know?”

Pressing your cheek into the pillow you shrugged as you yawned, “Well I keep a journal for my studies to help me remember, but Namjoon has been helping me in the great library. He’s quite knowledgeable and a wonderful teacher too.”

You felt confused as you watched Jungkook’s expression shift and his body straighten a little as he mumbled, “Namjoon…?” He looked a little childish in his words as he spoke up, “You could’ve just asked me to help you if you truly wanted to know about Penumbra.”

“You just told me you aren’t a teacher!” You cried out in exasperation, “How was I supposed to know you wanted to help me? In fact,” You waved your hand as you straightened up, “I’m positive you didn’t want to help me. I mean I appreciate it but you truly are sending me mixed signals here.”

Jungkook tucked his tongue into his cheek as he replied, “Well that's your fault for assuming, if you came to me genuinely curious and maybe added a please in, I would’ve been fine teaching you. Or at the very least answering any questions you had.”

You clacked your tongue in disbelief before you rolled your eyes exasperatedly, “You and your need for my mannerism is quite humorous,” A mischievous thought pulled over you as you spoke nonchalantly, “And I’m not asking though, I’m quite happy with Namjoon, he has a very beautiful way of explaining.”

You bursted with giggles at the way Jungkook tried to fight the sour expression on his face as you laughed, “But who am I to decline you? I’d be more than happy to have you teach me whenever you have a chance.”

“Good,” Jungkook replied, looking a little awkward and unsure of how to reply as he cleared his throat, “I want to make sure you’re learning everything correctly with no misinformation.”

You gestured towards the book in his hand as you hid your smile against the pillow, “Then start reading, I’m waiting.” You hugged your pillow close as Jungkook sighed, looking almost hesitant, as if he didn’t enjoy speaking allowed before he cleared his throat, as he opened the book where your page marker was at and began to read aloud.

Funny enough, his voice was quite soothing to listen to when he spoke just a hair louder than his usual quiet tone, it was strong and smooth and he’d occasionally pause in his sentence to explain in further detail whatever the book was talking about.

You were perched up, eagerly listening to his explanations and detail and time had passed quickly without either of you realizing it, too busy enjoying the conversation the other had to offer.

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