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seokjins-luigi · 1 year

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simple thing | part one | ksj

・summary: seven years ago, you left seokjin to pursue your dreams abroad. you promised to come back to him, but your pride prevented you from doing so. now, he resents you and all you have left is regret.

・release date: jan 8 - 6 pm (GMT-3)

・A/N: there it is :) i'm really excited to tell this story! as always, you feedback is highly appreciated!

・word count: 6.081

・banner: made by the amazing @gfxstdio

・permanent taglist: @goldenhoney-cas @yuugehn

・series taglist: @bri-mal @firesighgirl

“Oh, ______, imagine when it’s your turn”, you heard the dreamy tone in your best friend’s voice and almost laughed.

“I think you should open yourself up to the possibility of never being my maid of honor, because it’s extremely unlikely that I’ll ever get married”, you answered as you stared at your own reflection in the mirror, pleased with the adjustments made on your gown for the upcoming event. “Deep down, you know that”.

“Well, it’s not like you have no options, bitch. You just don’t allow anyone in your life ever since you came back”, Haewon counters, her voice coming from behind you, but you know her eyes are also on your gown. “Aw, you look so beautiful in it, _____. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry, but-”.

Her voice cracks and you turn around only to find your best friend with her face buried in her hands, obviously breaking the promise she’d made to herself. You understand where this is coming from and can’t help yourself when you feel your own eyes welling up as you wrap your mind around what’s really happening here.

Haewon is finally getting married to the love of her life. You already knew that, of course, but seeing yourself in the dress you’d wear on your best friend’s wedding, a day the two of you had dreamed about for so long, with all the adjustments and fittings done filled your heart with so much love, so much selfless happiness.

“You’re such a fucking softie! Come here…” You manage to say with an unstable voice, as you wrapped your arms around your lifelong best friend. “I’m so happy for you, Haewon-ah!”

“Ugh, I’m so fucking happy I can’t even put into words. But I’m also so nervous at the same time”, she sniffs, wiping the tears away from her eyes delicately so she wouldn’t smudge her mascara. “Like, intrusive thoughts keep getting in the way, what if Yoongi simply says ‘no’?”

“Ha! As if!” You let out a sincere laugh, smiling softly at her as you continue. “This is the most stupid thing I’ve ever heard you say”.

“Aren’t you gonna reassure me saying that Yoongi loves me more than anything or something?” She asks in a wobbly voice.

Which is funny, because in front of you stands one of the most confident women you know. You guess being a bride does mess with your brain.

“Do I really have to?”

“Not really”, she answers shyly, as if coming to the most obvious conclusion ever. She continues, trying to get off this specific subject. “And you… Especially in this dress, will definitely get yourself a hookup and live the drama of your dreams at your best friend’s wedding, have you thought of that? I think Kitae is single, by the way”.

“My god… You were crying two seconds ago thinking about the possibility of Yoongi leaving you, now you’re telling me about Hwang Kitae’s love life status… What happens inside this brain of yours, Haewon-ah?!” You poke her head playfully with your pointer finger. “Can’t I just look forward to enjoying the party or something? I can get a hookup any other time of the year”, you reply, automatically rolling your eyes at her.

She bursts out laughing, knowing very well it would annoy the shit out of you. She simply doesn’t understand that you have priorities in life and getting laid was not number one on that list. Not that you don’t want to get laid or flirt with hot guys, of course you do. But you have so many responsibilities at the university, not only are you a new professor, but as the Department Chair of the Paleontological faculty of one the top universities in Seoul. You’ve been invited back to your country to take up the position and you couldn’t be more honored with the invitation, you didn't even second guess your choice to leave the lab you had been working in China. The endless hours you’ve spent in libraries studying your ass off, at the lab or out at fieldwork were worth it and you finally got the job of your dreams.

Since you returned to South Korea relatively recently, it’s harder to get your social life back on track. And it’s not like the piles of paperwork you need to do every week will just work themselves, so you don’t have much time to spend flirting.

And it’s fine, you love what you do.

“Well… You know he’s gonna be there”, Haewon suggests with a suspicious wiggle of her eyebrows.

“Yeah, I know, Haewon-ah!” You stare at her for one second, then continue, a little too short on your patience than you’d care to admit. “Can’t you just leave my love life alone for a holy second?”

“I’m just saying, love. Don’t be mad at me”, she raises her hands, in sign of peace and you sigh. “I just feel like it’s good to emphasize that you’ll be seeing Seokjin in a couple of days. It can get awkward or uncomfortable, or make you feel bad, I just want you to prepare yourself mentally to go through it with beauty and grace, at least”.

Kim Seokjin is a touchy subject for you. A touchy subject you preferred to avoid for the past two years of your life, but, unfortunately, you wouldn’t be able to postpone this for much longer.

The mere image of Seokjin on your brain was enough to stir your insides up. Thinking about seeing him again makes you want to run away from Korea once more, leaving everything behind, just like you did 7 years ago. If it wasn’t Haewon’s wedding, you might as well have just done that.

But some things are better dealt with when faced with spontaneity and this is the plan you mean to follow when facing him after 7 years apart. The plan is: you will see.

“Yeah, I know”, you turn your gaze towards the mirror once again, taking in how good you look in the gown. At least, when you meet him again, you’ll look gorgeous. “It’ll be fine. Care to help me with this zipper?”

Something you couldn’t mention to Haewon was the fact that being a maid of honor was stressful as hell, but you could vent out about it to Hoseok, your other best friend. You did that pretty frequently, you might add.

That’s what friends are for, right?

“I swear to god, Hoseok!” Laying on your bed, you avow in a dramatic, but honest tone. “Chaewon is gonna try to start some drama on the wedding day, I know that devil pretty well. And honestly, I don’t know what to do to prevent it”.

“Can’t we just uninvite her?” He asks, laughing on the other end.

“I’d love to, but Haewon wants to give her a chance”, you stare calmly at your ceiling as you speak to your friend. “Yoongi told me that I shouldn’t allow her to give a speech, quoting: ‘under no circumstances’”, you try to make an impression of his raspy, low voice. “I wouldn’t let her touch the mic anyways, but having the groom to back me up makes everything easier”.

“Yah, _____, you shouldn’t worry so much! We’re all gonna be there to help you manage that dragon”, he answers you, giggling softly after calling the bride’s half sister a dragon. “And about that, when I say “we’re all gonna be there”, I mean, all of us. Including Seokj-”

“I know that, Hoseok”, you cut him short. “You guys really don’t have to bring him up every time we speak to each other, ok?”

“Ok… Sorry”, he replies tonelessly. “I just felt like I could point it out, since we’re all staying at the same hotel. But, anyways, go get some sleep, it’s pretty late”.

That’s the best thing about being best friends with an Aquarius sun, they will respect your boundaries no matter how wrong they think you are. You know he, just like Haewon, thinks you should face the problem, but he knows you are a grown ass woman and he just doesn’t even try to press the matter. He just leaves you be.

You check the time on your phone and he’s right. It’s 12:12 am and, unfortunately, your work at the university has turned you into an early riser.

“You too, Seok Seok, make sure to get some rest after lending your ear to my stressed self. Good night”, trying to soften your voice, feeling a faint pang of guilt on your chest for being rude to him.

“Night, sweetums”.

You hang up and throw your phone somewhere on your bed, rolling away from it to try to clear your mind. Could Haewon and Hoseok be right about Seokjin?

Like, do you need to prepare yourself before meeting him again after so long? But then again, how could you even begin to prepare yourself for something like that?

It wasn’t like you didn’t have to see his face every so often on your tv. You did. In fact, he’s the reason you haven’t kept up with the drama releases in the past few years, since he’s been the lead on so many. Yes, you know you’re the one who left, but it didn’t mean you left because you had no feelings for him, you were just scared. You’re human, after all, you’re allowed to regret.

But life finds a way and so do you. You fall asleep not long after reaching that conclusion, but tonight, you couldn’t avoid seeing Seokjin in your dreams.

That’s what friends are for, right?

“Can’t we just uninvite her?” He asks, laughing on the other end.

“I know that, Hoseok”, you cut him short. “You guys really don’t have to bring him up every time we speak to each other, ok?”

“Ok… Sorry”, he replies tonelessly. “I just felt like I could point it out, since we’re all staying at the same hotel. But, anyways, go get some sleep, it’s pretty late”.

You check the time on your phone and he’s right. It’s 12:12 am and, unfortunately, your work at the university has turned you into an early riser.

“Night, sweetums”.

You hang up and throw your phone somewhere on your bed, rolling away from it to try to clear your mind. Could Haewon and Hoseok be right about Seokjin?

Like, do you need to prepare yourself before meeting him again after so long? But then again, how could you even begin to prepare yourself for something like that?

But life finds a way and so do you. You fall asleep not long after reaching that conclusion, but tonight, you couldn’t avoid seeing Seokjin in your dreams.

As the day of the big event approached, you started packing slowly, since you hated packing for trips. You were in no position to complain, since Yoongi basically rented the whole hotel for the wedding guests. Like, it’s not a mediocre kind of hotel, it’s one of the best hotels in Daegu. He insisted on hosting the wedding in his home city and Haewon didn’t oppose to it, since she is from the capital and they live there already.

Hoseok went to Daegu before you, by plane. You preferred to take a car trip, since it wasn’t such a long journey from Seoul to Daegu. You do love driving, so it’s a good chance to take some time and do something you love for a change. Plus, you think it’s good to have your own car with you while you’re there, because if you need to rush with any last minute details for the wedding, you wouldn’t have to depend on anything other than yourself.

When you remember your best friend is about to marry one of the most famous rappers from Korea, you always smile. Like, everything turned out the way it was supposed to be. She was a big lawyer, he was a big artist. Hoseok, also known as J-Hope was the one who introduced them, since Yoongi and him were under the same label. You were away for years, doing what you have always dreamed to do.Namjoon, a friend you don’t get to see as often, because he’s always super busy, became a very relevant art curator known worldwide for his work. Seokjin became Korea's favorite heartthrob.

Things changed a lot since you were all young and in high school making all those plans. It took you a few hours, but with these thoughts keeping you company, the car trip to Yoongi’s hometown went flying.

The hotel your friend’s fiance booked for his guests couldn’t be more opulent, you were in awe the moment you first laid your eyes on its front. Tall gray walls rose against the Daegu sky, with several glossy windows reflecting the city lights. On the top floor, you can see a gigantic swimming pool that would be delightfully pleasant for you on these hot summer days.

After parking your car in the hotel facilities, you checked yourself in and rushed to your room. Laying in your bed’s comfortable white sheets, ordering something nice from the hotel’s restaurant and having the night to relax. You were very happy to find out you could access your Netflix account while there, so you chose a random romantic comedy movie to chill while you ate.

“Don’t you have any other friends, Haewon-ah? Why does it have to be me?” You uttered loudly, lowering your face in the direction of the sink, where your phone rested against the counter while you washed your face, still a bit slow due to the early hours.

“Will it kill you, _____?” You hear Haewon’s voice coming as loud as yours from the speaker of your phone.

“Yeah, probably!” You affirmed and gestured as if she could see you. “Ugh, doesn’t Yoongi have any friends to ask for stuff? What’s the point of being famous if you can’t ask favors from important people?”

“If you think about it, you’re kind of important too… You’re the most relevant paleontologist in South Korea right now”, you can see in your mind’s eye the expression on her face as she strokes your ego with this particular comment.

You’re not usually a very narcissistic person, but when it comes to your professional life… You kind of are. Haewon knows that and she, sometimes, uses that in her own favor.

“Yeah, well, long story short is: I don't want to!” You stare at your reflection for a second in order to help you think about something else to say. “Can’t Chanyeol go?”

“No, he can’t”, she answers dryly. “Don’t be a fucking child, _____. I know you have nothing important to do today and I’m asking you for a favor”.

She is right, you have nothing to do this afternoon. You wanted to chill some more by the pool, but you know she will just laugh at you if you say that. You have no other excuses to give her, there’s apparently no way out of this.

“Can't this guy just call an Uber or something?” You try for the last time.

“_____, he’s stopped the shootings of his next movie in freaking Japan to come to my wedding, I can’t just leave him and greet him like any other guest” Yeah, she has a point. You don’t really show it, but you agree with her. Seokjin has always been a considerate friend, damn him for that. “And you two are gonna have to talk to each other in a few hours anyways, can’t you try to make it a little less uncomfortable? We’re all staying at the same fucking hotel. I think if you two meet alone before the rehearsal dinner, it will be easier to deal with each other’s presence. You’re my maid of honor, _____”.

You knew since day one that, as a maid of honor, you’d have many obligations in your friend’s wedding and when you accepted to be Haewon’s maid of honor, you were counting on being bothered with all sorts of requests from her. Even your assistant, Jeon Jungkook, helped every once in a while when you were too busy at the university. But honestly? The only thing you didn't see coming was having to pick Kim Seokjin up at the airport. All by yourself.

Apparently god, the gods or whoever runs the skies or whatever has a very controversial sense of humor. And this thing enjoyed putting you in all sorts of embarrassing situations. Because, come on, having to pick up your ex-boyfriend of years, who you broke up with to go study abroad and who also happened to be very hurt by the breakup at the time, at the fucking international airport was a fucking joke. If you saw it coming, you’d have joined Hoseok on the airplane.

Sighing in defeat, you finally ask your best friend.

“What time do I fucking have to be there?”

You drove to the airport with The Seeds of Love blasting through the sound system of your car, singing along to each and every single one of the songs, in a desperate attempt to calm yourself the fuck down. It worked to a certain degree, but you were still feeling the annoying, but familiar sensation inside of you.

When you parked the car in the airport’s parking lot, you had to fight the urge to vomit and to run away at the same time. You know that seeing Seokjin for the first time in years will definitely mess with you in ways you didn’t even want to imagine.

You don’t particularly enjoy this sensation, to feel extremely lost into someone, but also utterly vulnerable. That’s why you didn’t keep your word. That’s why you didn’t look for him when you came back. Being with him always made you feel like there’s no one else in the world, apart from him. It was a sensation like no other, loving someone with your whole heart and soul, but the vulnerability that necessarily comes with it doesn’t really sit well with you. It doesn’t even suit you anymore.

Also, deep down, you knew he had already moved on and it was incredibly naive of you to think a man like Seokjin would be single for long. To make matters worse, he is an actor, for god’s sake. He would never wait for you, when he has the chance to be with people who are completely out of your league, but totally into his league.

That’s why the best option for you was just to move on with your own ordinary, academic life. Find someone nice and as ordinary as you, Seokjin and you don't belong in the same world anymore and that’s fine. That’s how life works. Things aren’t unchangeable and so aren’t people.

With your mind racing, you tried the breathing exercise your psychologist taught before leaving the car, but the magic didn’t work this time around. You couldn’t stop thinking and speculating about how'd you really feel when you finally laid your eyes on him.

Your legs dragged you into the arrivals area, as your eyes scanned the place in hopes of finding Seokjin before he found you. You didn’t arrive at the airport much earlier than you should have, because you knew that you’d be anxious as fuck, which didn’t give you much time to only think or speculate how you’d feel when your eyes lay on Seokjin’s after so long. You found out pretty soon, when unexpectedly you saw his brown, almond shaped eyes staring directly at yours, as soon as the doors from arrival opened. It’s like after all this time, he still found you in a crowded room no matter what.

For a couple of seconds, it felt like everybody else in the world was out of focus and Seokjin was everything you could see. He came walking towards you, his face remained in a stoic expression and you desperately tried to recompose yourself, more on the inside than on the outside, since you’ve always been good at hiding your feelings. It felt so surreal seeing him, after he became a celebrity, after you left him to pursue your dreams, so many things have happened and so much has changed in the meantime. Each step he takes in your direction, makes you realize it was all real.

He is there in front of you, Kim Seokjin, in flash and bones. He still looked the same as he looked seven years ago, the same striking beauty that always made you think you were the luckiest woman in the world. You really were.

He was wearing an oversized black sweatshirt and also a pair of oversized blue jeans, he looks so fucking cool it hurts. His hair is longer than he used to have back then, but you really think the longer hair suits him very well. You almost hate him for looking so effortlessly handsome.

You tried giving him a half smile, because the fact that he didn’t react in any way to your presence made you feel nervous. He didn’t smile back, though as he got closer, he bowed to you. Simply bowed, as if you were just an ordinary acquaintance.

Gulping, you bowed back at him.

“Seokjin-ssi, hi! Wow, it’s been so long”, you tried, in a desperate attempt to make the situation less awkward.

He pressed his lips together and nodded, not really looking you in the eyes right now. Yeah, he probably still hates you. Great! Did you really have to mention it’s been long? Of course it’s been long since the last time you’ve seen each other and it’s all thanks to you. You’re so bad at small talk.

Why did you allow Haewon convince you to do this, for god’s sake?

“Er- Shall we, then?” You ask him, the silliest and most awkward smile still hanging on your lips.

“Lead the way”, he replies and hearing the sound of his velvety voice for the first time makes you quiver on the inside.

“Do you…N-Need any help with your baggage?” You felt like a teenager trying to talk to her high school crush, stuttering like that.

“Oh no, I got it”, he denies and nods his head no, his black hair moving like silk against the wind. “Er- Thanks, though”.

He sounded a tiny bit less cold, which made you feel 0,1% better. You’ll need a very long hot bath to relax after this, you know for sure. You turned without trying to say anything else and made your way towards your car silently, listening to him following you in a safe distance. Your mind was racing trying to find a way to have light small talk with him, because the awkward silence you were forced to share with him right now made you feel like crying.

The weather? Fuck no. Soccer? You don’t care for sports. Politics? You’re not sure of his political opinions nowadays. No silly or light comments came to your mind and trying to mention the wedding would be too obviously a desperate attempt and Seokjin wasn’t stupid.

You helped him accommodate his belongings in the trunk of your car almost in silence, only exchanging a few words about the car and you were ready to get in and endure the longest car ride from the airport to the hotel.

However, he surprised you when you heard his voice meeting your ears.

“Good to know you came back, ______-ssi”, then, Seokjin opened the car door and took his seat.

Ok, so, he wants to do this. Better than giving you the silent treatment all the way to the hotel, you figured. You follow him on the inside of your car and try giving him another half smile, obviously trying to show him you wanted this to go as smoothly as possible.

“Yes, I’m back”, you laugh nervously as you start the car. “It’s been two ye-”.

“I know”, he cuts you off. “I know it’s been two years”.

You know he knows. You have friends in common, who have obviously mentioned that you came back to Korea, at some point. You’ve always known this conversation would happen, but as much as you tried to prepare yourself for this moment, you realized you couldn't truly be prepared for it.

“Oh”, that’s all you managed to say.

This is the only man you’ve ever loved in your entire life. Finally confronting you after you left. Looking at his eyes, they burned with resentment. You understand his reasons, of course you do. You left him after he proposed to you right after college, to follow your dreams, to become who you are today. You loved him, but you’d never give up on your dreams for anyone and you also didn’t want him to give up on his dreams because of you. His career was starting to take off when you got the scholarship in China and he offered to leave everything behind to go with you.

But you said no to him.

It hurt like hell to do so, of course it did. You loved him, but because you loved him you couldn’t tell him it was ok to give up on his dreams, on his career, on his life to be with you in another country for god knows how many years. Because you loved him, you couldn’t be selfish. That’s why you left, but it didn’t matter how many times you tried to explain your reasons to him, he would never fully understand.

“If I remember correctly, you said you’d come and look for me when you came back”, he raised his brows as he said it softly, disguising his rancor. “What happened? Was it hard to track me down or something?”

He knew it wasn’t, since he’s one of Korea’s sweethearts right now.

“Very funny, Seokjin”, you sigh, looking at the road, trying your best to stay focused on the traffic.

“Yeah, I’ve always managed to make you laugh, right? Good thing I’ve built my career in show business, huh?” You felt his eyes burning where they touched you, as he fixed his gaze on your side profile. “But let me try a different approach. Why didn’t you keep your word? All these years, I… have waited for you, _____”.

“Did you, though?” You glance at his figure for a second and you see his eyes widening, then you turn your full attention back to the road ahead of you. “It wasn't like you’ve been single these past few years, you know? How did you expect me to come back years later, begging you to give me another chance after reading all about your flings with your coworkers all this time?”

He laughs humorlessly and when you don’t follow him, he asks you lowly.

“Are you serious?”

“Why would I not be?” You pinch your eyebrows as you reply to his question with another one.

“You tell me”, he scoffs, running his hands through his hair, then sighs loudly. “And don’t try to change the focus here. I asked you a question first”

“Seokjin, I…”, your voice trails off and you simply stop trying to find something to say.

Does he really need you to confess that you were scared that, after all those years, you were afraid of getting rejected? Doesn’t it go without saying? When you left, everything was different. Seokjin has always attracted the attention of, basically, everyone. He has always had unmatched visuals, an unique sense of humor, charisma, intelligence, morals. It took you such a long time to build your trust on him and on your relationship, because in the beginning, you’d compare yourself to everyone who approached him, scared he’d realize he could do so much better with other people, who were prettier, smarter, funnier than with you. Does he really need you to say that you just got scared all over again?

“Why didn’t you come find me when you came back, ______-ssi, like you promised?” He stressed the last word out as he spoke slowly, clearly annoyed by your silence.

“Things… changed”, you declared hesitantly, taking the easy road on your way to avoid focusing this too much on your feelings. “Haven’t they?”

“Not for me”, he replies without even wincing, then he adds. “Why? Have they changed for you?”

They haven’t, actually. You wish you could just tell him everything, like you used to. Just let him know how you really feel, how insecure you felt all the times you thought about calling him or even going after him in person. But how could you? Time does, in fact, change things. As much as two people wish for things to stay the same, they hardly ever do.

What you really wanted after all these years was just to throw yourself into Seokjin’s arms and find the comfort no one else has been able to give you ever since. If only he knew how much you craved him and how difficult it was to be inside of your car right now, where his perfume filled the whole space and almost made you intoxicated with longing.

You wish you were a little more selfish, so you’d just ignore the fact that everything happened the way it did and just throw yourself into his arms, not giving a shit about what comes next.

But you aren’t selfish, at least, not when it comes to Kim Seokjin.

With your mind racing, you hesitate before you’re able to form a coherent sentence in your brain and he notices.

“Ok, I see how it is, ______”, his head snaps in your direction again, even though you got your eyes focused on the road, you feel his eyes on you. “You’re seeing someone, aren’t you? Of course you are, for fuck’s sake. Of course you’ve found someone after all these years…”

If only he knew you’d compared every guy you met all this time to him, he’d laugh so hard, he’d probably get hiccups. You haven’t been able to establish true connections with anyone else ever since you left him, unlike him, who’s been involved in several dating rumors during these past few years. You know because you read all of the details from every single one of them, while the only dates you had ended up being on night stands with random guys you met in bars.

“No, I’m not”, you coldly reply, turning your face into his direction for a split second, just to see the surprise taking over his face.

“You’re not seeing anyone, then?” He allows the words to roll off his tongue slowly, repeating the question he asked you a few seconds ago, only this time the disbelief was obvious in his tone.

“No”.

Seokjin crosses his arms in front of his chest and breathes through his nose loudly. Maybe this was as uncomfortable to him as it was to you. You just couldn’t wrap your head around why he’d want to do this after all this time, both of you had said everything there was to be said back then. There just isn’t a reason for you to go through this all over again, fortunately, you aren’t far from his hotel now. You soon would be away from him all over again, safely hidden at your hotel room, where you could cry all night long, until the gigantic lump in your throat disappeared. Mostly because you’d try to forget about it with a relatively expensive bottle of wine.

After a brief moment of silence, he starts again.

“I just… Need to hear you saying why”, he turned to you as he spoke and it sounded like he was on the verge of crying.

Knowing you made him suffer has been something that prevented you from sleeping every once in a while and a lot of times you ended the nights hating yourself for it. You hate yourself for causing all of this. You just wish life was easier, you wish you could have everything you want, you wish you could have had a brilliant career and Seokjin at the same time.

After all these years, the truth is he doesn’t need you anymore. He’s famous, he can have anyone he wants. You just wish he could understand that and that it was the sacrifice you decided to make on his behalf. You want him to be happy, not stuck with you and your unexciting academic career.

“I really don’t know, Seokjin. There’s no… specific reason, I guess”, you gazed at him as you summoned the strength to continue. “I just think it doesn’t make sense to me anymore”.

It obviously is harder than you think, because you know none of it is true. You’re just a coward, you just avoided him these two past years, because you were scared of being permanently dumped. You guess you preferred the what if, than to really just let Seokjin go. You were not ready to let him go, he’s always been your haven, your safe place, even after the two of you broke up. He’s your favorite memory.

And it was better to have his memory untouched, than spoiling it with real life and getting dumped because he was having the time of his life as a famous actor, fucking god knows who.

“What doesn’t make sense?” He queries you almost in a whisper.

“Us”, you reply in the same tone. It takes every ounce of strength in you, but you lie again.

You don’t see it, but his eyes darken the minute your words meet his ears like a sucker punch to his stomach.

He takes in a deep breath and seconds later, your car is filled with his low, deeper voice.

“So, you’re saying that everything we lived together, everything we shared… The promises both of us made to each other… None of it makes sense to you anymore?”

Judging by the way he just asked you this, you were slowly starting to realize that, perhaps, it all still makes sense to him, just like it still makes sense to you. Perhaps, he’s been waiting for you to return, like you promised. Just like Haewon and Hoseok had foreseen it, but you refused to believe it. Because you are a fucking coward, the worst kind. You lie to people and you lie to yourself in a desperate attempt to protect your pride.

It was far too late to change your mind now. Specially, after the way he spoke to you now. You know he’s deeply hurt and things will, in fact, never be the same again.

You can’t even think about anything to say. You aren’t mentally able to tell him again that you think your history simply doesn’t make sense, the kind of love you and Seokjin have for each other doesn’t just stop making sense.

“You know what, ______-ssi? Nevermind” He breaks the silence, but his voice is still a little louder than just a whisper. “I thought I could do this, but it’s impossible to have this type of conversation like this. Can you please stop this car!? I’ll call myself an Uber”.

“What?” You ask him, dumbfounded. “I’m not gonna just drop you on the side of the road, we’re almost there-”.

“I’ll be fine”, he cuts you off dryly and louder than before. “I’ve been fine without you these past seven years of my life, it’s not like I need you anyways”.

Okay, you deserve to hear that. Your brain goes into code red and you’re very happy that you’re a good driver, because you know you can’t fully function right now. You open your mouth in an attempt to argue against his request, but no sound comes out of it.

“Seriously, ______. Stop this car”, he demands, this time around.

Your feet automatically hit the brakes, just like he told you to, stopping the car by the sidewalk. You’re still taking it all in. You imagined this wouldn’t end well, but you even surprised yourself with how bad it actually ended, all thanks to you, of course.

“Please, just send my baggage to my room when you get there”, he sneers, his eyes glued on your figure and you can’t muster up the courage to look into his eyes.

He opens the door and gets out of your car calmly, then closes the door delicately. That’s the scariest part of it all, Seokjin is the confronting type, he doesn’t take shit from people and he didn’t even want to continue talking with the conversation, there was no closure. He just cut you off. He couldn’t bear being in the same space as you. Saying the shit you said was probably the final nail to this coffin and as much as you hate admitting it to yourself, you were the one who dug this grave. You followed his figure with your eyes as he distanced himself from your car, not even once looking back.

He is now totally free to move on with his life, as he’s supposed to. He’s rich, beautiful, talented, charismatic, funny, relevant, famous. You don’t belong with him anymore and that’s fine. Some people aren’t made to be together and it is fine.

It actually isn’t fine, not at all, but you’ll learn how to live with it. You’re just happy to know he’ll live his life to the fullest now, after burying his past with you.

Lucky you driving has calming effects on you, so you play your sad girl vibe playlist and drive back to your place, as tears rolled down your cheeks.

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kooklovee · 8 months

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Jungkook- ff recs masterlist 🔞

So here's my fav Jungkook ffs of all time plus a MUST READ compilation 💌.

All the recommended ffs are 18+ so MDNI!!

S: smut | A: angst | F: fluff | ❤️: extreme favs

(fics are not ordered in any specific order of preference and neither do they entertain infidelity or any major triggering themes 🙃)

Starting off with the 2 most "SEVEN" mv inspired one shots I've read till now -

■ Night after night by @brown-bi-beautiful ❤️ ( S, A, F )

■ Devoted to trouble by @jeonsweetpea (S, slight A, F)

Seven days a week by @jjkeverlast (S, slight A, F)

Thirteen rounds by @moni-logues (S)

Slow motion by @rerefundslocals(S, A, F)

@personasintro 's masterlist ❤️

Legit ALL her ffs are TOP NOTCH. So here's link to her entire masterlist. Fav author for a reason 💜

Ps - Mutual help & Away from you are Ultimate lovee!

Stay with me by @jungk0oksthighs ❤️(S, A, F)

Reminder by @dollfaceksj ❤️ (S, A, F)

Over wine (Ongoing) by @koocycle (S, A)

There's no way by @redjoonie (S, slight A, F)

Seven ways to sunday (Ongoing) by @jeonjcngkook (S)

Bad Omega, Sweet Omega JJK by @helenazbmrskai (S, A)

Drabble collection by @onlyswan (F)

Office break by @vminizzle (S)

Two point five by @bratkook (S, F)

My you by @wnderkoo (S, slight A, F)

This is how we break by @ahundredtimesover (S, A)

Unplanned night by @vminizzle ❤️ (S)

Rolling stone by @kooktrash (S, A)

4-7-8 by @jiminrings (S, heavy A, F)

Sleepless nights by @wnderkoo (S, F)

Backstage quickies by @btsqualityy ❤️ (S)

So good by @ggukiepie ❤️ (S)

Lost on you by @letjungcoook7 (S)

Cramped quarters by @btsqualityy (S)

Kink series by @btsqualityy ❤️ (S)

Bts reactions by @cheolhub (S)

Early riser by @moni-logues (S)

Bf!Jk drabble by @letjungcoook7 (S)

Standing next to you by @back2bluesidex (S)

On my mind by @angelguk ❤️ (S)

Ceo!Jk one shot by @letjungcoook7 (S, slight A)

All over again by @jungkookstatts ❤️ (S, F)

Return the favor by @back2bluesidex (S, F)

Jk!drabble by @borathae (S)

The bet by @letjungcoook7 (S)

Bf!Jk (kinda break up au) by @letjungcoook7 (S, A)

Bf!Jungkook by @jungkookstatts ❤️ (S, F)

Cherry flavored by @jungkookstatts ❤️ (S, F)

Black dye by @mercurygguk (S, F)

When the end comes by @oddinary4bts ❤️ (S, F, huge A) happy ending tho

Down on you by @ki-yomii ❤️ (S)

I want you to stay by @ahundredtimesover (Ongoing)

Birthday boy by @jeonfics (S)

Wishing for you by @kookiestarlight (S, A, F)

Guilty Pleasures (Ongoing) by @kookslastbutton (S, A)

The violence of the dog days by @youarewhatyoulove-blog ❤️ (S, F)

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strawberrymatchawhore · 9 months

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exbf!jungkook x exgf!reader

“you wrap around me and you give me life… and that's why night after night i'll be lovin' you right”

summary- after seven long years of the breakup between you and jungkook, he randomly decides to show up and tries to prove that hes really a changed man.

warning/s- DUBCON. rough sex under the influence (both sides), hesitant y/n, choking, fingering, messy sex, lovebomb/confession, nutting inside (a/n also sorry for not posting for a while n this was kinda rushed soo i do apologize in advance LMAOOO)

you loudly groaned and smacked your hand around the couch to look for your phone, who the hell calls at this hour ? you took a hit of the joint youve been smoking for the past few minutes and then clicked the answer button.

“hello ??” you lazily say and roll your eyes and take another hit.

spam callers are so fucking annoying.

“y/n…” the voice says, it was deep and husky… even almost sounding like..

“huh ?!!! jungkook ??” the call abruptly ends until a loud knock can be heard from your front door. you get up confused and take a peak through the window and see your ex boyfriend leaning against the porch chair.

fuck what now

you open the door and take a second to figure out what to say.

“what are you doing here ?” you said in a monotone voice, trying to hide your interest as to why he decided to show up after so long.

“i need to talk to you y/n.. please.” he slurs gently pushing you aside to go inside your house, the smell of alcohol and expensive cologne accumulating from his body.

“jungkook..” you tried slowing his pace down and pushing his chest but he wouldnt budge.

“jungkook !! you cant just randomly show up to my house like this and expect me to welcome you with open arms !!” you dragged him to the couch and made him sit down you stood in front of him and examined his state.

“y/n you smoke now ?” he picked up the joint and tossed it back down.

“yeah that doesnt matter right now, why are you here ?”

“look.. i just wanted to say.. i just wanted to say that im sorry for everything that ive done to you in the past. i know words cant fix the damage ive done but after all this time i never forgot about you and i realized all of my faults.. i really really have changed for the better, and i hope you can let me back into your life again y/n.” he slurred, it was almost funny how desperate he sounded. like the roles of the past were now reversed.

you tilted your head, jungkook was never one to own up to his mistakes or even apologize. the sinking feeling in your stomach rises when he briefly mentions the past. but even drunk, maybe he really has changed. it has been 7 years. you stood in silence as jungkook made himself at home on your couch.

“look jungkook, its been a while im gonna have to think about it. and youre drunk, just lay there and i’ll get you some water. you can spend the night.” you softly said, damn it. he was good.

he nodded in response and you went to the kitchen to get water and meds, this also gave you time to collect your thoughts. you said you would think about forgiving him but could you really believe that he’s changed after the relationship you were in with him all those years ago ?

you put the stuff for him on the coffee table and sit down near him, trying to keep a distance. closing your eyes and opening slowly feeling the high more. you look over to jungkook and laugh. this didnt feel real at all.

he then sits up and scoots closer to you, leaning his body onto yours. his mouth was now near your ear and you could feel his hands gently massage your waist. he pulls you to his lap and you let out a low gasp from the sudden movement.

“jungkook. we really shouldnt be doing this…” you say using his thighs to try to get up. the grip he has on your waist tightens, almost bruising even. you wince and move around his lap more to try to get free.

“what do you mean ?” he lowly says he keeps one hand on your waist and massages it his other hand makes it way up to your neck and squeezes.

“you’re basically grinding on me.” he chuckled, you could feel his bulge pressing against you. you whine and dont respond. only the music playing from your tv could be heard. what situation did you just get yourself into ? he lets go and his hand slides down to your pj shorts touching the wet spot on your panties.

“s-stop.” you moan, sounding extremely unconvincing. the both of you knew that you were just saying bullshit, your legs basically open wider for him to continue further. his pushed your panties to the side and gently rubs your clit, and teases it before dipping a finger into your pussy.

“you sure you want me to stop ?” he adds another finger and speeds up, his palm stimulating your clit. you moan and grab his hand.

“…your pussy is just so fucking wet.” jungkook whispered in your ear. you know you shouldnt be enjoying this but you honestly missed him and wanted more. not that you would admit it. even though he most definitely knows by now.

“fu- all f’ you.” you mewl biting your lip, it felt too good.

“yeah all f’ me ? does it feel good baby ?” he teases nibbling your ear. you moan incoherent words and close your eyes.

“course it does just listen to how youre taking my fingers.” you could hear the wet slick sounds of his long skinny fingers going in and out of your pussy. his rings adding more to the package. you could feel yourself about to cum and jungkook slows down.

“you gonna cum ?” you whine and nod yes grinding on his hands to try to get back the lost stimulation. he removes his fingers from you and roughly shoved them into your mouth, you automatically suck and swirl you tongue them licking them clean of your juices. seems like you still have some muscle memory.

he guides you off his lap and maneuvers you face down ass up. giving him a full view of your ass, he gives a few hard smacks before you feel him move his tip up and down your pussy. already antsy and wanting more, you try to reach back and put it in yourself but he grabs your arms and pins them to your back, forcing you to arch it even more.

“uh uh youre not allowed to touch, just lay there and be a pretty little thing for me.” he says before pushing his dick inside of you. your mouth opens into a silent o and you push your hip against his.

“ah-h feels so good kookie.” jungkook leans forwards and uses your arms to thrust faster and harder. your ass bounces from the force.

“fucking missed this pussy.. missed you. ah- fuc-” he breathily whimpers, your moans synching with his.

“youre the only one that makes me feel like im enough and i- fuckkk- im sorry.. oh my- god.” he rambles and moans completely pussydrunk, your cream forming rings at the base of his cock. disappearing and reappearing with his thrusts. he lets go of you and rest his hands on your hips, guiding them towards his big cock.

“you got nothing to say y/n ?” he mocks knowing that youre fucked out, your head rests on the couch cushion and drool covers your chin. you could only moan in response, tears filled your eyes as you felt yourself about to cum.

“no-gonna cum ahh!” your eyes squeeze shut and you grip the couch, your body starts to shake and you expect jungkook to slow down. but no, this man is evil. in fact he speeds up and fucks you through your orgasm.

“jungkook.. jungkook thats too much !!” you whine and reach back to push on his abs. but he chuckles and grabs your arms again. lifting you up against his chest with one arm. the other wipes your tears and rests against your neck.

“gonna fill you up nice n deep.. wanna see that shit leaking from your tight pussy.” he squeezes your neck, if his arms werent holding you up. youd fall right down, the pleasure he was giving you was intense. he was fucking you stupid.

“fuck jungkook, please cum inside please please.” you could feel your second orgasm come when jungkooks first arrives with it. his thrusts gets sloppy but he tried keeping his pace. you were met with a warm sticky feeling inside you when jungkook gently lets you go.

“so pretty all filled up with my cum baby.” he coos and drags his leaking cum back inside you with his fingers. you whined from the overstimulation and he laughed in response. making sure all of it went back inside you, he leans next to your figure and brings you into the little spoon position.

“i love you so much y/n i promise to never hurt you again.” he kisses the top of your head and cuddles into you tighter. you dont respond and just lay back feeling your high come down. this was gonna be a long and hard night of thinking, who the fuck did you let back into your life ?

#jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook imagine #seven #seven jungkook #bts #bts jungkook #smut #jungkook fluff #angst #ex to lover #jungkook x you #jungkook x oc #oneshot #jungkook oneshot #jungkook angst #jungkook au #au

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ahundredtimesover · 1 year

Text

Belong (01) | MYG

Pairing: Yoongi x (f.) Reader

Genre/Tags: exes-to-lovers-to-exes-to-lovers; actress!OC x basketball coach!Yoongi; summer romance; “long” distance relationship; parallel timelines; angst, fluff, smut

Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, family drama, sport injury; dreams & moving away; implied depression; basketball and acting talk; 2014 and 2022 Yoongi; shy and nonchalant cocky whipped Yoongi; explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter (18+)

Chapter Word count: 14.2k

Series Masterlist

Status: Complete

Series summary: Being an actor has always been your dream. Pursuing it meant many things - leaving the town where you grew up, distancing yourself from your family that had fallen apart, and saying goodbye to the man who made you feel what home was like. When you decide to finally return after being away for so long, you meet Min Yoongi again, and you’re reminded of the summer romance from 8 years ago with the college basketball superstar whose broken dream pushed you away. As you find yourself spending time with him, you’re left to wonder if love changes, if it gives second chances, or if it’s just another illusion that will hurt the both of you the second time around.

Listen to: Boston by Augustana; Shelter by Luca Fogale || Playlist 🎶

A/N: Posting this today to celebrate People pt.2 and D-Day! Here’s a little piece I’ve had for a while. It felt fitting to write something about dreams and finding your purpose through Yoongi and at a time when I’m going through something similar. There’s nothing like his wisdom and his warmth so I hope this could mean something to you somehow. 💕 Please enjoy! And 🫡 to NBA Ambassador Suga! Now that’s his 🏀 dream in another form.

Present Day

There’s always something magical whenever you watch yourself on screen.

It’s not due to some narcissistic reason or an insatiable desire for the spotlight; it’s not even because you think you’re really talented. Sure, you like the attention and just like anyone who’s spent years of their lives perfecting their craft, you want to be pretty great at it, but all those thoughts become suspended whenever it’s your scene.

During these instances, it’s only about your character and her emotions, and that’s what you think is remarkable about it - watching yourself is just like being there, in that moment, on that set, feeling it all.

Most actors would say they love acting because it gives them a variety of roles and personalities to play. You like that bit, too, but it’s the character’s emotions that you commit yourself to the most; it’s being able to immerse yourself in the feelings of joy and anger, of contempt and fear, of envy and admiration, of guilt and love. You like the finiteness of it, that with acting comes the feeling, and you know at some point, it’s going to end.

Once the scene is over, so is the emotion; you’re able to let go of it right away with one breath. You’re good at that, you think - holding onto something for as long as it’s yours, and then letting it go when it no longer is.

The collective gasp of the people around you breaks your bubble only a little; you release a breath yourself as the last scene unfolds. And with the final shot and the succeeding transition to the end credits, you let go of the sadness.

“I can’t believe that only took one shot,” your best friend, Taehyung, says in awe. “I would’ve been crying already knowing how it ends.”

“Jin and I challenged each other,” you proudly say. “We said we’d do our absolute best for that first try and the director thought it was that good. Seriously, not crying until that last second was so hard; I didn’t think I could do it.”

The Kim Seokjin, your co-actor and good friend, looks at you from the other side of the couch with that soft and proud look that you only ever get from him once a project is over. You return the sentiment, knowing that you wouldn’t have survived your first lead role in a drama series if he wasn’t acting alongside you.

He’d been your senior at university where you both took your major in acting. He was already modeling then and snagged a major role in a movie right after graduation; he became a household name after that.

You watched from the sidelines as he achieved his dreams while you took the occasional 30-second roles given to the students, but he didn’t forget you. He called regularly to know how you were doing, gave tips when you asked, and informed you of upcoming auditions.

It was the type of friendship that challenged you, given that you both wanted to one day star in a series or movie together, a culmination of all the long hours of rehearsals and line-reading and classes that you both did. He had already made a name for himself; you wanted to be good enough to have yours be opposite his.

It would take a few years, but after a supporting role in a romcom movie that saw people wanting more of you, you and Jin finally got cast in a series about a mortal woman falling in love with a celestial being, which, at the beginning, reflected your respective statuses in the industry. You expected the show to do well - everything that Kim Seokjin touches turns to gold, as the saying goes - but you didn’t expect for the public to love you both as a pair as much as they do, given that they want you to star in another show right away.

“I cried as I turned around,” Jin says of the scene where he had to go back to his world and leave you behind. “That was heavy and even I’m impressed we did it in one shot.”

“Well, the sadness and grief would have dwindled by the third or fourth time,” you chuckle. “I’m not good enough yet to maintain all the emotions after so many takes.”

“Not that you aren’t good enough,” Jin counters. “You just haven’t been in the industry that long yet. That kind of experience makes a difference. I’d say I wouldn’t have been able to sustain the same emotion for long, too. It was a difficult one. I mean, what goodbye scene isn’t?”

It’s a rhetorical question, of course, but much of why it was difficult for you to keep the emotions in was because it was your first goodbye scene. You have a feeling that the succeeding ones wouldn’t be any easier, though. You’d like to think you’re okay with goodbyes and that says a lot, but then again, you don’t know anyone who’s actually good at it.

Or maybe you do. But you’d rather not think about it.

It’s silent for a few more seconds. You suppose that the rest of your co-actors who are here with you are still processing the end of a series that’s been their source of comfort for the past few months, too. It had been your weekly routine to watch the episode together in Jin’s house, not wanting to let go of each other just yet after filming wrapped up a few weeks ago.

“Well, that was amazing, wasn’t it?” He finally speaks up. “It was a good run and thank god that ___ insisted on these watch parties. Or else I’d be crying by myself in my room after the finale,” he laughs. “This better not be the last time we see each other.”

“Because it isn’t,” you reply. “We still have that cast and crew dinner and a couple more filming stuff for promo. That’s easily another 3 more weeks of being together. Which is really 3 weeks too short.”

“So… does anyone want to go on a trip after that?” Hyun-seung, one of the actors, excitedly suggests. “It’d be a good way to unwind and use up what we’ll earn.”

You laugh along with everyone but you’re the only one who passes up on it.

“I can’t,” you sigh. “I have a trip to Daegu at the end of the month and I can’t move it.”

Disappointed sighs echo throughout the living room, and you insist that they should continue with the trip without you. Most of them don’t want to, but you eye Jin so that he would make the call to push through with it even if you won’t be around, so he does. It’s rare to find such good company with other actors, and you truly want them to maintain the friendships they built here way beyond the series.

Your friends make general plans as you listen in, wishing you could be there instead of home, which is where you’ll be for the next 2 months as you promised your family. Or more like, as they guiltripped you into doing.

You haven’t been home in years and for good reason. After your parents separated and you were the lone child who didn’t harbor anger towards your mother who wanted to pursue her dreams elsewhere, you promised yourself you’d leave that place, too.

Visits during summer had been fine. But after the most painful goodbye you ever made, you’d stopped going back altogether, reasoning that your up and coming career required all your time. You doubt that your family knew the truth, and despite their remarks of you following in the footsteps of your mother, those weren’t enough for you to open up about something so heartbreaking, knowing it hit too close to home. Their bitterness wasn’t a reason for you to keep going back either.

“Daegu, really?” Jin asks after everyone else has left, save for Taehyung and Jimin, your personal assistant whose glassy eyes say he’s not yet over the season finale. “You haven’t been home in 6 years.”

“Four, actually,” you correct him. “I had a filming there sometime ago.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t actually go home,” he clarifies. “You went to the shoot then back to your hotel. I remember that; I kept asking Tae how you were doing.”

“I was fine,” you shrug. “How was I supposed to be? I was good, just couldn’t wait to get back here. I had a boyfriend, remember?”

“Andrew was a fling, not a boyfriend,” Jin rolls his eyes, and you confirm that the model is his least favorite of your exes. “And if I remember correctly, you broke it off days later.”

“Well, it stops being good when it stops being fun,” Taehyung says, mocking your usual statement whenever your friends ask why you broke things off with your partners. “She shut down when she came back. I guess going home does that to her.”

“You know how places just naturally comfort you? Daegu isn’t that place,” you try to explain. “I had to get it off my system for the one week I was there and Andrew acted out. I just didn’t want the drama.”

Everyone nods, knowing it’s how you usually are. You always viewed relationships as a complement to your job. Being an actor is tough work with its own complications and you definitely don’t want it from your partner. It was always easy for you to fall into that honeymoon hole with someone, but you always walked away from it just as quick once the rainbows and butterflies had subsided. Whether it’s jealousy over your leading men or not having enough time, or just wanting to be by yourself to regroup, your exes always found a reason to argue. And you were always good at walking away when you needed to.

It was like that with every person. Except one. Your friends don’t know if he’s the reason why, or if he’s the exception.

“So what made you decide to go home? And for how long?” Jin queries, feeling a little worried because of what he knows is out there for you. He’s always been a little protective like that.

“About 2 months?” You respond, to the surprise of the older man. “My dad wants me to celebrate his wedding anniversary with them. And spend time with my sisters’ kids and my grandparents and shit.”

“And spend time with my parents,” Taehyung adds, knowing it’s probably the only thing you’re excited about, given how much they adore you and vice versa. “They can’t wait to see you.”

“Same here,” you finally smile. “We’re definitely seeing them first.”

“Anyone else you’re going to see there?” Jin asks some more.

“You can say his name, you know?” You nudge your friend’s knee. “I know he’s who you mean.”

“Well then. Are you going to see Yoongi?”

“I don’t plan on seeing him but I probably will. It’s a big city but it’s a small town. Plus, I’m with Daegu’s Prince right here,” you say, pointing to your best friend who’s made a name for himself as a ballad singer. “Tae will be dragging me around so I won’t be surprised if I encounter Yoongi somehow, somewhere.”

“And what happens when you see him?” Jimin now asks, wanting to know if he’d need to drive to you in case you decide to come home early.

“Then I see him. We’re… fine,” you state, earning you an eye roll from each man, so you clarify. “I mean, I’m perfectly fine living my dream in Seoul. And he’s a college basketball coach in Daegu, which is the closest to his dream he could get, and I heard his team’s doing really well. It’s been 6 years. He let me go. And I’ve moved on. Who knows how it’s gonna be like? But I’m civil with each one of my exes and it won’t be any different with him.”

“He’s different, though,” Jimin points out. “You actually loved him; you can’t say the same for all your exes. And you can’t argue that,” he adds, seeing your shaking head and disagreeing face. “Drunk and hungover you told me all that more than once and I trust that version of you over the sober one when it comes to your love life.”

“Okay, Mr. Know-It-All,” you frown at him. “I wasn’t going to deny that but it was the naive, impulsive, hopeless romantic version of me who loved him. That’s not me anymore. I’ve grown up. I know what I want from my partner, and Yoongi is just the small town boy who’ll always think that his broken dreams will keep him from loving me the way I deserve. And maybe he’s right.”

It’s quiet for a while, as your friends take in your words since you rarely ever talk about the man unless you’re in an inebriated state or recovering from it. But it’s the first time that the possibility of seeing him looms over you, knowing that within those 2 months, you’re bound to run into him somehow.

Now it’s too quiet, and you realize that none of you know what to say since you’re all sober. Truth be told, you don’t remember anything that Jimin’s ever told you during those times that you opened up, and Jin never really said much, knowing how hard that breakup hit you. And Taehyung, well… the man was there before, during, and after it all, yet he never really said much, always choosing to let the silence engulf both of you.

“Look, I’m touched you all seem to be worried,” you finally speak up. “But I’m going to be fine. I found a house I’m renting that’s nice and private. I’m actually excited to eat at my favorite restaurants and visit places I’ve missed. I can’t do anything about my family but at least Tae will be with me the whole time and save me from their madness if he needs to. And Yoongi, well… he’s a closed chapter in my book. There’s no reason to revisit that. Hi, goodbye - that’ll be it, just like before.”

You sigh to yourself, hoping that your friends would take your word for it, though you don’t really blame them if they don’t. They’ve seen you barely bat an eye after calling it quits with your exes but they’ve heard of how broken you were because of that breakup; seeing Yoongi again might just bring up old memories that you might not be ready for. And they won’t all be there to lift you up like they’d want to.

“Okay then, if you say so,” Jin finally smiles. “But if something comes up… you know I can always drive there and bring you back here.”

“And add to the already existing rumors about us being a thing?” You laugh, referring to all the social media fodder about your chemistry that’s too good, it might be real.

“So? Then we let it,” he shrugs.

“Does the Kim Seokjin not care about dating rumors?” You gasp. “You always complained about it. Don’t tell me you like me.”

Jin sits next to you and cups your face in his hands. “I… love you. The way a dear friend who dreamed with you and who gets to live that out with you does. We all love you. We’d do anything for you. You know that, right?”

“I do,” you say, humming once he plants a soft kiss on your forehead, just like all the times he’d done before - when you graduated university, when you didn’t get callbacks, and when you landed your first major role. “Thank you.”

You decide to head out after a long evening. Jimin lists your activities for the next day before he’s dropped off at his apartment. Taehyung lets you listen to his new single for his upcoming album, and you get emotional over his soulful sound and the fact that he gets to live out his dream with you, too.

He walks you to your front door and hugs you tightly, just like all the times he’d done before - when you cried about your family, when Yoongi broke up with you, and when you found out he was dating someone new.

“I love you, okay?” Your best friend whispers.

He says it in that soft, comforting voice of his. The one that always told you that things were gonna be fine, as if love solves all things, and at one point, you believed it did.

Your hometown of Daegu looks very different from the last time you were really here. It changes a lot. And it changes pretty quickly.

But some things about it stay the same - family-run restaurants, streets lined with little shops passed down from generations, the parks and the temples, the playground in your old neighborhood with the basketball court that you know all too well.

They make the place home, Mrs. Kim says. That doesn’t change no matter how far or how long you’ve been away.

You want to disagree. This place was never home. It felt like bits of it during the times you used to watch ballet performances at the Opera House with your mom or when your dad used to grill makchang on Friday nights.

But when she decided to leave and then he remarried, you had just memories of home left. Your sisters’ resentment over your happiness for your mother as she achieved her dreams took all that was remaining, and coming here reminds you more than what you lost; it reminds you of what you can never have - that space to dream, the place of safety, the love that would endure time and distance.

You enjoy the best short ribs dish over Mr. Kim’s recordings of his saxophone performances. Mrs. Kim dotes on you like her own daughter, and Taehyung announces all the things you’ll be doing now that you’re both back home, taking your respective breaks that you deserve, and spending the money that you worked hard for.

You eventually leave for some rest. The house you’re staying at is far from the buzz of the city. It’s private and secure, a little too spacious for one, and boasts of the views of the mountains. Jimin had found it, knowing you’d need the peace and quiet amidst all that would be taking place during your short time here.

Taehyung will be staying over at his parents’ place, but they insist that it’s open for you to visit anytime you want. You think you need the time for yourself, though. Your job often requires you to be around people, and you’re thankful for the choice you have now to be away from them. For some time, at least.

[From: Manager Jung] Are you settled? I’ve got a script for you to go through. Sending it now

Your agent-slash-manager’s message disrupts your moment of tranquility as you sit out at the garden, watching the sun set. You’d arrived from Seoul in time for lunch and spent the rest of the afternoon at Taehyung’s parents’ house before heading to yours.

[To: Manager Jung] Yeah, all good. But give me a week until I read the script. Don’t want to think much about work yet

[From: Manager Jung] Fine. Just don’t take too long

You sigh, knowing that though you promised Jin and Jimin that you won’t be thinking about work while you’re here - you need a break from it all, they told you - your manager won’t really let you. And much as you want to complain about him pushing you real hard, you’re thankful that Jung Hoseok always does.

He was the one who saw your talent and insisted you’ve got a bright future after one casting call that you were almost late for. He was strategic in which roles to pitch you for as a rookie actor, and which ones would get you ahead of the game, no matter how challenging it was. During the times you wondered if you were meant for this industry, he always assured you that you were. There was always going to be a bigger break after the last, he believed, and he promised you he’d go searching for that role until you got the biggest break of your career.

And every time you think he’ll cross the line of pressuring you too much, he says something sweet, brotherly, friendly.

[From: Manager Jung] But take care of yourself there, ok? Don’t let them talk down on you. Don’t let them crush your dreams

You’d cry if his words came with a hug.

[From: Manager Jung] And guard your heart. Don’t let him hurt you again

You pretend he means your father; he let your sisters’ resentment of you go on after all, and his inaction made you feel unloved in your own home.

You don’t want to think that Hoseok means someone else because it would mean that for all the times you questioned if everything you gave up to chase your dream was worth it, then he knew it was because of the man who broke your heart 6 years ago. You don’t want to think that all these years, Hoseok knew that your buzz-worthy dating life, whose aftermath he always had to manage, was just your futile attempt at getting over the first and only man you ever loved.

Being in any sports facility unsettles you. You always claim that the buzz of sporting events just isn’t your cup of tea - you prefer the noise of a film or television set, or of a theater right before the movie starts. It wasn’t always like that, of course. You used to enjoy the screams and heckles of sports fans; you used to be one of them.

But you found out the hard way that losing someone means you lose the parts of you that you’d adopted because of them, that you fall out of love with the things you used to love because of them.

Basketball is one of those things. It’s why Taehyung used to not invite you whenever there were Thunders games at Jamsil despite the free tickets always available for you; he knew you’d say no and he hates rejection.

But Mr. Song is a man you can’t say no to. Not only is he the city’s mayor, he’s also a good friend of your father’s, which is how the chief official got wind of your return.

Your trip isn’t meant to be publicized. Actors take breaks and visit their hometowns regularly without attracting the media, and oftentimes, that’s thanks to the local government, who employs their political will and own security to ensure that celebrities aren’t disturbed while they’re on vacation or just visiting family. It’s good for them, of course, but it also sometimes comes with small favors, like a private dinner with some of their close friends and some photos or autographs. You don’t really mind, especially since the same is extended to Taehyung, hence why the lunch earlier at the mayor’s residence wasn’t all that bad. It was only slightly awkward with your father because you chose to meet up with Taehyung’s family first before yours, but your dad didn’t dwell on it.

Other than privacy, one other thing you get are free courtside Korean Basketball League tickets. The Pegasus just recently moved to Daegu from Incheon and there’d been a lot of promotion to get the city to give their full support to their new hometown team. Mr. Song thinks that photos of you and Taehyung attending the game will be the publicity that the team needs, and while your best friend genuinely agrees to the arrangement, you only do so half-heartedly. You’ll at least see your friends who are playing for the other team, but even the thought of Jungkook and Namjoon being back home and the party they’ll throw after is making you even more unsettled.

“Hmm, number 16 was pretty cute,” you whisper to Taehyung as you head out of the locker room after some photos with the home team. “I wonder if he’ll be at the party tonight.”

“No, he won’t,” your best friend responds.

“Why not? Because he’s from the other team? I’m sure that Jungkook won’t mind, right? I mean, yeah it’s his house but—”

“Tonight is for college friends only.”

“We didn’t even go to their university,” you point out, given that you and Taehyung studied in Seoul and had met there, instantly clicking after finding out you both hailed from the same city. “Why are we going?”

“We are honorary members,” he replies. “I went to high school with them and you…” he trails, trying to figure out how to phrase how you became an honorary member of their group of friends without bringing him up.

“Are the ex of one of their friends,” you finish for him. “You can say it, you know?”

“I don’t know, can I?” He arches a brow.

“Yes. I don’t deny the fact that Yoongi and I dated.”

“You just deny how much it affected you.”

“You mistake my amazing ability of moving on for denial,” you groan. “But oh shit. Wait. Does this mean that he’ll be there at the party?”

Taehyung huffs as he settles in his seat and looks at your worried eyes. “For someone who doesn’t seem to be in denial, you sure look a bit anxious that he might be there tonight. Didn’t you say you can be civil with your exes?”

“Yeah, I can,” you reply defensively. “I don’t know about him. But then again, he moved on first, so I doubt seeing me would affect him much.”

Your best friend lets out a breath, not wanting to argue. He’s learned long ago that when it comes to Yoongi, you’re dead set on many things - like the narrative that he moved on first, that he was so much happier without you, that dreams were always more important for him, whether it was yours or his. Taehyung tried to help you process that whole experience, especially the aftermath, as you went on dating one man after another after you found out about Yoongi dating some local musician.

But you always had a default answer, that you’ve always been that way - quick to fall in love and quick to fall out of it, and Yoongi was no exception. You met, fell in love, and while you technically didn’t fall out of love, the breakup left you no choice but to do just that; he was the one who insisted that you leave, after all, and you’d been the one too heartbroken that he didn’t love you enough to make you stay.

“Well then let’s just see what happens,” Taehyung shrugs. “We’ve got a game to watch, a party to go to, and friends to catch up with.”

“And a nice, peaceful home to retire to after tonight. I’ll need all the good energy before I see the rest of my family tomorrow,” you sigh.

Right, there’s that, Taehyung frowns. Your family’s too complicated that you insist you don’t want him to get sucked into the drama, hence why you don’t want him to go with you. But between that and the possibility of seeing your ex, he could only hope that during this trip, you won’t get your heart broken too early, too quickly, or too hard.

“How is it that the Pegasus have been playing here for months but it’s the first time we’re watching their game live?” Geumjae asks incredulously as he sips his beer.

“Because it’s the first home game of the season against the Thunders when I’m home and when Jungkook and Namjoon don’t have girlfriends to give their tickets to,” Yoongi explains to his older brother. “And well, I never asked before.”

“Well, good on us that you’re here and your friends currently don’t have girlfriends,” Geumjae laughs. “Also, you could totally ask. They’re your friends; I don’t think it would be that hard for them to get extra seats for us.”

“I’m not their only friend here. I’m sure a bunch of the guys from college would ask,” Yoongi shrugs.

“You’re not just their friend, Yoon,” his brother groans. “You played with them, you captained them, and led them to college championships.”

“Yeah, yet I’m the one hustling it out as a college coach while they’re playing pro,” the younger man huffs.

He doesn’t mean to be bitter. He loves those guys, hustled it out with them until the late evenings just to get the proper training and workout in almost a decade ago. He couldn't be any prouder when Jungkook and Namjoon got drafted to professional teams and then reunited as teammates with the Seoul Samsung Thunders just 2 years ago. Yoongi had been the encouraging senior who messaged them right away, happy for his peers for being together again just like old times. He won’t lie and say it didn’t sting a bit to be left out from the life they all dreamed of having, with him being the only one who didn’t get to achieve it alongside them.

“Well, if it matters at all, you’re doing amazing,” Geumjae tries to cheer his brother up. “I read online that many are calling your team to win it all this year. Imagine being the only person in your school’s history to be a champion player and coach? Not just anyone can say that.”

Yoongi hums, trying to let the thought comfort him. It doesn’t do much; coaching a college basketball team is leagues away from playing professionally. The energy is different, so is the hustle. Shooting hoops with the kids during training isn’t the same. The lights and the cheers as he sits on the bench calling plays isn’t the same either. He can at least say that with coaching, he’s able to shape and mentor the young ones, direct them to better paths, encourage them to reach their dreams, and to not settle for a life they’re not happy with or proud of. He’s got a bunch of players who got drafted last year and dedicated their first professional game to him, and that’s an indescribable feeling he’ll always hold onto. It reminds him that even if it wasn’t him, it was at least someone he cared about.

He watches as the players do their warmups on court before the start of the game. This isn’t the first time he’s watched live, but it’s the first time with Jungkook and Namjoon as teammates, so seeing them goof around and do the handshake that they used to do warms his heart a little. Maybe it’s this bit of joy that he needs to remind him that it’s okay, that even if life turned out differently for him, at least basketball is still part of his life. There’s more he wants, of course, but this is way better than nothing. He reminds himself at one point, he didn’t think he could ever set foot on a basketball court again.

The game finally starts and though he’s usually quiet whenever he watches games, he can’t help the small small cheer he makes whenever Jungkook or Namjoon scores or makes crucial plays. He still knows their moves, can still read Jungkook’s pump-fake, and can still tell by Namjoon’s stance if he’s gonna make that rare three. Though he was a shooting guard during his glory days, Yoongi still prides himself in his playmaking skills and knowing his teammates well, something that scouts used to rave about.

Yoongi sips his beer, no doubt enjoying the exciting match. He obviously wants the Thunders to win, but the Pegasus aren’t backing down, not letting themselves trail by more than 8 points. He’s in a bit of a trance, as he lets himself drown in the cheers of the crowd, imagining that it’s him leaving it all out on the court.

But as he looks up on the big screen during timeout, he feels like the air is being sucked out of him. His ears don’t betray them either, as the announcer calls on your name and Taehyung’s - “celebrity sightings,” he says, while you and your best friend wave to the camera and smile like the superstars that you both are. The cheers get louder and Geumjae joins them until he realizes.

“Shit, that’s your ex-girlfriend,” he whisper-shouts. He laughs at the scene of his brother practically choking on his drink. “Wow, she still has that effect on you, huh?”

“No, she doesn’t,” Yoongi says nonchalantly, desperately forcing his heart to slow its beating.

“Did you know she’s gonna be here?”

“I don’t keep tabs on her whereabouts, Geumjae,” he replies, suddenly sounding hard, defensive.

“Do you think she’s gonna be at the party?”

Fuck, the party, Yoongi slightly panics. Jungkook talked about the sort of reunion he’s throwing at his house after the game. Their old teammates will be there, as well as some other friends from college who are still in the city. You and Taehyung were honorary members of that group and Yoongi knows that you’re both invited, too.

“I guess,” he merely shrugs, looking like it doesn’t bother him much.

It shouldn’t. It’s been 6 years, and while he’d been the one to break it off, you’re the one who’s dated a lot since then, something he can’t fault you for. You’d obviously catch a lot of attention - you did catch his - not just for your charm and unbelievable beauty but for your talent as well. He’s not surprised that you’re rumored to be dating Kim Seokjin, said to be this decade’s most desired leading man and who also happens to be your good friend, the one who’d helped you out a lot during your years in university. Yoongi used to be a little jealous then, something he never told you, and well, he guesses it’s meant to be with you and Seokjin now, a man he could probably never live up to.

“Are you gonna be okay?” Geumjae breaks through his thoughts.

“Yeah. Why won’t I be?” Yoongi huffs, sinking back to his seat to watch the game that suddenly isn’t so interesting anymore.

His question is left unanswered and his brother resumes his cheers, no doubt invested in this match that’s now tied. But Yoongi drifts in and out, his eyes following the players up and down the court then mindlessly landing on you. You’re seated in a relaxed manner, the opposite to how you used to watch his games. He sees you silently cheer for the Thunders, too, and you giggle at Taehyung when you scream louder than you intended, your hand covering your mouth as you lean on your friend and he laughs along.

He could hear the sound of your laughter from across the gymnasium, as if the way the dulcet tone of your voice used to send shivers down his spine whenever you giggled in his ears was just yesterday. He shakes off the goosebumps he feels and tries to sit comfortably on the chair.

“Are you nervous?” Geumjae asks. “You’re awfully quiet.”

“Since when was I ever loud during a basketball game?” He shoots his brother an incredulous look.

“You may not make a sound but your body does,” the older man points out. “I could feel you buzzing earlier and cheering in that Yoongi way of yours but now,” he eyes him up and down, “your legs are just bouncing. And you're biting your nails again.”

Yoongi catches himself. He forces his leg to be still and tucks his hand under it. It’s a tell he has, and he has no doubt that his brother has caught on. Still, he lies. “The game’s close. I want the Thunders to win.”

“Really? That’s what you’re going with?”

“Yes, now can we just focus on the game?” Yoongi chides, not wanting to confirm whatever his brother’s suspicions are.

“Fine, but for the record, I know exactly why you’re nervous.”

“I don’t really care.”

Geumjae sighs as he watches his brother’s gaze go to you once more, unknowingly, perhaps, as Yoongi seems to shake himself off after every time he realizes that his eyes were locked on your direction. But he can’t blame the younger man. You entered his life and he fell, extremely hard, and letting you go was the most difficult thing he ever had to do. Yoongi doesn’t need to tell him though, but there’s enough of his younger brother’s broken pieces lying around for Geumjae to know that it was also something he regretted doing, and he wishes his brother was at least brave enough to admit all that.

The Thunders win by 5 points. It was nail-biting until the very end. It was Namjoon’s crucial offensive rebound and Jungkook’s 3-point shot that sealed the game for them, and Yoongi was present enough to witness those last few plays. He decides to enjoy this moment with his friends, knowing they’d be asking him about it later. If he’ll still go to the party. Somehow, seeing you again made him a little dizzy. It was still on the screen, but now he’s not sure he’ll know what to do when he sees you in person.

He and his brother let the crowds go before heading out separately. Geumjae’s car is parked elsewhere, and Yoongi decides to head to the washroom and pace his walk to the parking lot. Hands on his pockets and eyes glued to the floor, he hears a gasp, and he releases one himself when he sees you, hiding behind one of the vending machines as a group of fans at the end of the hallways starts walking towards your direction, wondering aloud where you went.

He sees the panicked look in your eyes and decides to stop the crowd before they come any closer.

“She headed that way,” he announces, pointing to the right. “There’s an exit there. She probably left already.”

You hear the disappointed sighs, and much as you don’t want to let your fans down - you’re not one to deny them autographs - there have been too many of them this afternoon and you weren’t mentally prepared to accommodate each one of them. The footsteps disappear not long after and you let out a sigh of relief. That was close, but you didn’t expect Yoongi, of all people, to be the one to stir them away.

You turn to him, about to say your thanks, but somehow the words get stuck in your throat. You recall being a giddy mess the very first time you saw him, with nibbled lips and palpitating heart as you watched him shoot baskets and dribble the ball like no one’s business, and you’d been a goner since then. But he was a lot thinner during that time. His hair was cut short and his eyes had this sharp, confident gaze that usually intimidated people. You eventually saw how they softened only for you, though, but you’ll always remember that summer and how he had you wanting him at first glance.

This man before you isn’t all that different. He still has the same sharp eyes, with his look penetrating right through your soul like he knows you and well, he does, which is also why he was quick to misdirect the crowd after he perhaps saw the look of worry on your face. His tiny nose is the same, so is his pale skin. But his hair is now long, pushed back in the middle as it softly reaches close to his shoulders. He’s a lot leaner; you can easily tell from what’s hiding behind his thin white shirt underneath his blue jacket. You recall him dressing mostly in monotone colors, so seeing him in something a little more striking is new. He’s gorgeous just like before, and you don’t really know why you expected that he wouldn’t render you speechless this time around.

“___,” he calls out. “Were they bothering you?”

“No, uh…” you stutter, hating yourself for suddenly being nervous. “There were just too many of them and they were getting quite close, I kind of panicked. Stupid, really. I should be used to it by now. More of them came and I just…”

“If they were invading your personal space then that’s not right,” he says, his tone so serious you mistake it for worry. “Did they touch you or anything?”

“Oh no! Nothing like that. I just got a bit overwhelmed.”

“Where’s Taehyung?” He asks, as you watch him walk to the vending machine where you’re hiding, tap his card, and then get the bottled water that falls out. He opens it and hands it to you as if he’d done this so many times before, and well, he actually has.

“He met up with a couple of friends,” you explain. “The crowd got to me right after and I kinda lost him, but I told him I’ll meet him outside, somewhere near where the players come out.”

“Hmm, okay,” Yoongi hums, looking away.

He should’ve expected you to look way more beautiful up close but he tends to overestimate his ability to be entranced by you. He’s surprised he even got any word out, but the worry crept in the moment he saw you look a little winded and he just wanted to make sure you were alright. You’re a celebrity, after all, and the city’s “Princess,” as they claim.

You look a little nervous though, and a part of him just wants to scold Taehyung for leaving you behind, seeing as neither of you looked like you had security with you earlier. But that shouldn’t be his responsibility anymore, he reminds himself.

“Thanks for the water, by the way,” you speak up. “How much was it?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Thanks again,” you smile shyly. “So, uhm, do you know where the other exit is? I’m kind of lost.”

“Oh, uh… the one close to where the players go out is there,” he cocks his head to the left, towards a hallway behind swinging doors. “I can uh, I can show you where.”

“Ah, that would be great. Did you park close there, too?”

No.

“Yeah,” he lies. “Let’s go before more people see you.”

He opens the door and walks after you. It doesn’t help that the hallway suddenly feels much smaller and closed off because now, Yoongi has to listen to your footsteps and nothing else, since neither one of you chooses to talk.

What does he say to the woman he broke up with 6 years ago? Maybe he can say something about your recently concluded series. He thought it was really good. Is it weird to ask what your next project is? Perhaps. You probably can’t even tell him. How was it like being the leading lady this time? Fuck, he’s not a talk show host or anything like that.

He sees the end of the hallway before his mind can come up with another stupid question, and he rushes to the door before you do, catching you by surprise.

“Just wanted to make sure there’s no one to bother you,” he explains, as you exit the building with questioning eyes.

“Oh, thanks,” you smile shyly again.

He’s not used to it. He remembers the way your eyes used to gaze at him constantly, how your smile and laughter were all cheeky and flirty, how the tone of your voice was always so confident, so charming. He thinks that maybe like him, you’re just as surprised and unsure about seeing each other after so long. He doesn’t know what to make of things beyond that.

“Do you have someone to pick you up?” he asks, needing to prepare himself if, as a last resort, he’d need to drive you somewhere.

“Yeah, Tae and I were supposed to ride together but,” you pause, checking your phone for your best friend’s text message, “he rode off with his friends and said he’d meet me at Jungkook’s instead so I’m just waiting for the guys. There’s the—”

Party, Yoongi says in his head.

“___!” Jungkook’s loud voice cuts you off. He jogs up to you and puts an arm around your shoulders, unaware of the man in front of you who’s being blocked by a wall. “You ready to go? Tae said he went ahead.”

Yoongi makes his presence known with a low grunt, his eyes pacing from his friend to you. You both look a lot closer than he remembers, and Yoongi’s mind goes to that first time you all met, how Jungkook had announced during their team celebration that the “girl with the yellow scarf on her hair is so pretty” and that he’d wanted to ask you out. Of course, things turned out differently - you weren’t interested in the younger man. But that was years ago. Jungkook has had an impressive professional career and he lives in Seoul. Maybe things have changed for you.

You follow Yoongi’s eyes. Despite many people claiming that he’s difficult to read because of the default unconcerned, almost detached look he has for every situation, you think he’s actually pretty transparent.

Or maybe that’s just you. You’ve spent enough time with him to know his sound of annoyance and the meaning of his body language. You’ve memorized that pretty face of his at one point that you can tell the slightest parting of his lips and the tiniest drop of his eyes, which could mean that he’s confused, sad, or disappointed. Maybe all.

“Oh, we’re not…” you exclaim, surprising yourself, to the amusement of Namjoon, who suddenly appears next to you. “I mean, Jungkook and I aren’t… a thing.”

You promptly remove the man’s arm from your shoulder and try to decipher Yoongi’s look now. Is it relief? Does he believe you? Does he think it’s silly that you had to clarify that, which you’re wondering why you did?

“Okay,” Yoongi says.

Perhaps you’re wrong. You can’t tell right now what he’s feeling.

“We just… got to hanging out when I got drafted by the Thunders,” Jungkook now clarifies, which he quickly realizes is maybe making this awkward situation a lot worse.

You’re Yoongi’s ex-girlfriend after all, and Jungkook had been the one to reach out to you when he moved to Seoul, but not once did he try to pursue you all these years. He respects his captain too much and cares for what you both had, which is why he maintained his friendship with you even after the breakup.

“That’s nice to know,” Yoongi replies, his tone nonchalant like always.

He’s glad he can keep his cool that well, even if his heart was just about to explode at the thought of you possibly dating his friend. He doesn’t know why he cares, though, as he never really thought much about the so-called code that stated that exes were off-limits to friends.

He’s just about to turn around when Namjoon calls out. “Min, you’re still going to the party, right?”

Yoongi looks at you, who promptly looks away. Up until 10 minutes ago, he was about 80% sure he would. He didn’t think that being in close proximity to you would make him remember all sorts of things, and that itself is enough for him to run for the hills and avoid you. He won’t claim he did his best to forget about you - he at least tried, and that still counts - but he didn’t expect he’d ever get a chance to be near you, much less talk to you and be in the same place as you. Again.

But he looks at his friends’ eyes, both pairs unsure yet practically begging him to still go. He remembers these looks, and he swears it’s because he doesn’t want to let both of them down that he battles with the inner part of himself and decides to still go. It definitely doesn’t have anything to do with somehow finding out for how long you’re staying, and why you’re here in the first place.

“Yeah. I’ll see you guys there,” he replies, turning around now and heading towards his car on the opposite side of the parking lot.

You watch Yoongi walk away, unsure of why your heart is beating as fast as it is. It had been like that since you saw him after hiding from the fans, and even more so when you walked silently in the hallway to head outside.

You knew you were gonna see him, maybe even at the party, but not in the way you did. And all your confidence at not being bothered or affected with seeing him again melts away.

You weren’t prepared for how good he’d look, for how concerned he’d be over your safety, and for that hint of disappointment on his face at the thought of you being with Jungkook. Neither were you prepared for that incredibly tiny part of you that wants to know how he’s doing and if he’d managed to piece together the broken parts of himself and his dream that he so adamantly chose over you.

You survive the car ride by glaring at Namjoon every time he starts teasing you about panicking over Yoongi thinking that you were dating Jungkook, while the latter curses as he drives, claiming he survived one of the scariest moments of his life.

You arrive in Jungkook’s house in half an hour, a nice place he bought for himself because he said that Daegu will always be home for him. The sliding doors to the patio give it a spacious feel, and you see that a couple of his friends had already prepped the space, complete with beer kegs and beer pong tables, the way you remember they always used to party.

The 3 of you spot Taehyung who greets you, and the 2 men next to you proceed to narrate what happened, to your best friend’s shock and amusement. You also fill all of them in with the first part of the story about Yoongi finding you as you hid away from the crowd.

“How… symbolic,” Namjoon hums. “You meet at a basketball court in Daegu after a game while you were hiding from fans because you’re such a bigtime actress now. I mean, it’s quite ironic. The universe is out to tease you or something.”

You agree, it is. It’s times like this when you wish you didn’t believe in fate and destiny because doing so would just give you false hope that you and Yoongi may be meant for more than just those 2 years together. And you absolutely hate it because you can’t fall into that trap of thinking that you’re meant for a happy ending that includes him. That ship sailed a long time ago - 6 years and about 5 partners later.

But as Yoongi enters the house, his bowed head turning up to search the area before daintily tucking a strand of hair behind his ear, you start to think that maybe that ship decided to turn back around and sail towards you once again. He briefly meets your eyes before someone calls out to him, and you’re left to admire him from afar, cute button nose and impeccable side profile and all.

Taehyung pulls you by the arm and whispers in your ear. “Okay, so what’s our plan?”

“What do you mean, our plan?” You ask, realizing you’ve lost Yoongi as you glance in the direction of where he was, no longer finding him there. “Plan for what?”

“Yoongi, obviously,” Taehyung rolls his eyes. “Do we avoid him, be civil, pretend you don’t think about him anymore, or act like the past 8 years didn’t happen and we don’t actually know him?”

“None of the above,” you groan. “What kinds of options are those?”

“Decent ones?”

“Nope. You’ve already had a lot to drink and I don’t trust you when you’re drunk.”

“Except you should. This is when I don’t hold back when it comes to you,” Taehyung answers.

“And you hold back otherwise?” You frown.

“Just when it’s about him. It was tough for a long time. I know sometimes it still is.”

You don’t have the heart to disagree. This man has been your best friend for a decade and he knows how you are, knows which pains of yours you’re willing to talk about and which ones you’d rather hide away. Your acting skills may be good but you know that Taehyung can see behind all the smiles and the detachment and the effort to look okay, and whatever it is he’s thinking, there’s a good chance he might be right. You’ve just never been brave enough to admit them.

The look of understanding you both share gets disrupted when cheers erupt in the middle of the living room, seeing that Seungkwan had just beaten Jungkook in beer pong. The pro player demands a rematch and the entire house cheers in agreement. Jungkook takes the next game but Seungkwan won’t back down.

“Let’s do it in pairs,” he challenges. “I take Joon.”

“Fine,” Jungkook says, his game face on, knowing there’s one other person he knows could win this with him. “I take the Captain.”

Cheers erupt once more as people push Yoongi to the center where the rest of the guys are. He shakes his head, seemingly uninterested in partaking in tonight’s festivities but goes anyway after much coaxing from everyone. He then does his handshake with Jungkook to the younger man’s insistence, and you watch Yoongi’s soft, shy smile appear.

And just like the very first time you saw that, you feel your heart thrum in excitement. There was always something special about it, and back then it was because he rarely did it, but he did it a lot when he was with you. It’s nice to see it during a moment like this - surrounded by his old friends while having fun with them. You’re glad he shows more of it now, and you wonder how many people fell harder for him because of it.

You watch from the sideline as the Jungkook-Yoongi pair score 4 straight. Seungkwan complains that Namjoon isn’t making any shots, prompting the older man to claim that he’s way better at dunking than shooting tiny balls like they’re jumpers. They eventually lose after all the theatrics but it’s enough to get the guests going, as you find yourself teasing both men as well.

You remember their house parties being this rowdy and this loud, given all the energy and testosterone that these athletes had so much of. That obviously hasn’t changed, and despite all of them having grown up, looking all mature and much more respectable, the naughtiness remains, especially once they’ve had too much to drink.

It’s why you find yourself surrounded by a bunch of the guys, asking for a photo with you to show off to their friends and families.

“I’m showing this to the guys at the office,” Seungkwan announces as he gets your approval over the selfie picture he took of you both. “They’re not gonna believe I went to college with an actress.”

“Uh, I didn’t go to college with you,” you laugh along with the others. “I studied in Seoul.”

“Then how the fuck do we know you?” He exclaims, no doubt drunk out of his mind at this point. You remember him having a short-term memory every time.

“He’s the Captain’s ex, dumbo!” Soon-young reminds him, another one of the younger guys who hasn’t drank as much but was never good at knowing what not to say. “Remember the summer before his final year? She was with us all the time.”

“Oh right. They were inseparable and looked so in love,” Seungkwan giggles, and at this point, the rest of the people just go with what he’s saying.

Not you though, neither does Yoongi, and neither does Namjoon, who slaps the back of Seungkwan’s head to loud-whisper that the ex-couple in question is right there.

“Shit, did they hear me?” Seungkwan wonders out loud and looks around before sipping his beer. “I meant it though.”

He laughs drunkenly, so do many others. There’s really only a handful of you who aren’t intoxicated, but right now you wish you were.

“Wait, they’re both here?” Seungkwan recovers, eyes now glassy.

He gasps when his gaze turns to you and then Yoongi, and he puts his arm over your shoulder and slightly drags you to the right so he could put his arm over Yoongi, too.

“I found them!” Seungkwan squeals, pushing both of you to face him. “Shit, you still look good together.”

“Alright, dude, that’s enough,” Namjoon finally steps in, pulling the inebriated man away. “Sorry,” he turns to you. “Don’t mind anything he said.”

Too late, you want to say, but you release an awkward laugh instead.

“They haven’t changed since college, huh,” Yoongi says, surprising you. “They still put us on the spot then leave us to deal with the aftermath,” he continues, watching as the group disperses to go drink and chat again.

You turn towards him and sigh in relief over the small smile he has on. You swear the tension was so thick earlier that you could cut it with a knife, but Yoongi doesn’t seem bothered. He looks calm like he always does, and just like those first few times, you take your cue from him. You try to release the tension from your body and smile.

“They should be banned from drinking when there are ex-lovers in the building,” you chuckle. “But I’m pretty sure he’ll be apologizing to you like crazy once he’s sober. Wish I could see that.”

“I can’t wait for that, too,” Yoongi hums.

A wave of silence envelopes you both. The sounds of your friends seem like white noise now, and with the background music on and the man next to you just sipping his drink, it’s oddly comforting.

You learned long ago that he has this amazing ability to do that - make people around them feel calm. There’s something so reassuring about him that remarks about your past don’t faze him, and now that’s rubbing off on you, as you feel the awkwardness slowly melt away.

You and Yoongi stand by the couch while the world around you continues. You’d stay in this bubble with him if it wasn’t so familiar, only because the familiarity scares you a little. You don’t want to know if anything else feels the same.

“I’m gonna look for Tae,” you say, breaking the silence.

You only need to look to your left at the sound of someone hooting to find your best friend downing another cup of some concoction, and by the sound of his laugh, you know this is the one that will do it for him. This is his point of no return. Anything he does after is not meant for many people to see; he has an image to protect, after all.

“Alright, that’s my cue,” you say, walking towards him.

You cup Taehyung’s face in your hands and tell him that the party’s over and you’ll take him home. He argues, but you remind him that he’s a celebrity and that he can’t have drunk pictures of him circulating online. His inebriated mind sort of gets it, and you take him in your arms and start looking around, trying to see which of the guys are the most stable one to drive.

“How are you going home?”

“Uh…” you turn to face Yoongi. “One of… them? Jungkook, Wooz, Soon-young all offered.”

“And they’ve all had a lot to drink,” he replies.

“Who here hasn’t?” You chuckle, eyes still searching the room. You don’t want to ask your safest option, which is the man in front of you. You’re not quite sure how your heart can handle that.

“Me,” he says so casually. “I just had one bottle.”

You know what he means, even more when he goes to Taehyung’s side to help you assist your drunk best friend. Yoongi doesn’t say anything else though; he just stands there while waiting for your reply. This is about safety, you remind yourself, and it has nothing to do with suddenly wanting to be in his presence just a little longer.

“Okay,” you reply, knowing he knows what you mean, too.

“Okay.”

All three of you say goodbye to your friends, all of whom give you smug looks, passing up on the teasing now given Yoongi’s displeased face after someone remarks that “mom and dad are taking care of their kid again.” This isn’t a new scene for them, either. Taehyung just tends to have a lot of genuine fun when he’s with his friends; it’s something you relate with after being in the industry you’re in.

You and Yoongi help Taehyung in the backseat where you sit, with your best friend’s head securely on your lap because he’s now complaining of a migraine. Your designated driver starts the car shortly after he checks on both of you.

“Neither of you took your cars?” He asks.

“Tae did but passed up on driving tonight,” you say. “I would’ve driven, had I known he won’t be able to control himself. I’m still waiting for my requested rental car.”

Yoongi merely hums and focuses on the road while you… well, while you sort of focus on him. Your position behind the passenger seat allows you a view from the side - from how his fingers drum the steering wheel to how he nibbles his lips. His eyes are focused on the road but you can tell he’s focused on both of you, too, with the way he turns to the back whenever Taehyung makes some garbled sound or just to ask you if you’re okay.

You watched him do this so many times before with you next to him, holding his hand and kissing his cheek at every stoplight. For someone who loves music, he never put the radio on when he drove you. He said it allowed him to focus on you, and that memory isn’t one that you really want to think of right now, especially since it’s silent in the car. You don’t know which ones you’d rather remember, though - the good ones or the bad. You suppose either would hurt regardless, and this wasn’t something that you prepared for.

You make it to your best friend’s house as you and Yoongi assist him to the gate to Mrs. Kim’s shock. She scolds a barely-awake Taehyung and apologizes profusely to Yoongi, who says she’s happy to see him in their home once again. As Mr. Kim takes his son up to his room, Yoongi turns to you and asks if you need a ride home.

“I’m sleeping over,” you say in a panic. “Someone’s got to take care of his drunk ass.”

“Okay,” Yoongi says, briefly meeting your eyes before nodding towards his car. “I’ll go ahead. It was nice seeing you again, ___.”

They’re simple words that any old friend would tell another after seeing them in years, but somehow they hit you differently. This entire evening hasn’t been a dream or some made up scenario in your head where you meet the man you loved after so long.

He’s here. With you. Looking at you in a way you’re very unfamiliar with - with a calmness in his eyes and a hint of care and acceptance, as if he’s glad you’re here but that he’s well aware of the years between you, of the years that passed by, of the years that changed you both.

You don’t respond fast enough because before you know it, he’s turning around, ready to head out the door.

“It was nice seeing you, too, Yoongi,” you say softly.

But he hears it, stops walking for a while, and then opens the door and walks out.

You wonder if he’d said something the day you left, would you have stopped and turned around? Or would you have kept walking?

But thinking about that won’t do you any good, so you turn away as well and head upstairs.

Outside, Yoongi steps on the gas, turns to the next corner, and then stops the car. He clasps his hands together so they’d stop shaking, and he lets himself breathe for the first time tonight. He’s kept his cool long enough, but after everything - the party, the teasing, the car ride - he doesn’t think he can hold the emotions in any longer, and he doesn’t even know what they are.

Longing? Sadness? Regret? Is it the unspeakable feeling of fear at the thought of you dating one of his friends who might actually be good for you? Is it relief at the idea that letting you go was the best thing that he could’ve ever done for you? Is it confusion over wanting so badly to take you in his arms but not wanting to feel your touch, knowing it would remind him of everything he’s tried to forget?

Yoongi lays his head on the headrest and takes a breath. You’re so beautiful, as if some light shines on you wherever you go. It’s probably the glow you emit; he’s told you that before but you always said he was just teasing. He sees it even more now.

But it’s also the crinkle of your eyes when you smile that sweet smile of yours that makes things feel familiar, and because of that, uneasy. It’s that honey sound of your voice; he heard it as you laughed during the party and joked around with everyone. It’s that captivating look you have, the one that says you know something but you want to know more; he felt that look when he entered the house and as he drove you earlier.

He wonders if you saw past him, past his nonchalance and calm demeanor. You were always so good at that - knowing there was more behind his passiveness, knowing how to get a reaction from him, knowing which buttons to push so he’d open up and let you in.

He doesn’t know if he should be afraid that you still know how to do it, or if he should revel in it because he’s missed you, more than he could ever say and more than he’d ever care to admit.

But beyond all that, he’s sure that one of his emotions is happiness. Every time you talked about work and being able to watch yourself on screen - he swears he didn’t eavesdrop but that he just happened to be there - there was that excitement that felt like the continuation from when you used to talk about your big dreams with him.

You got what you wanted and you worked hard to get to where you are and he knows you’re proud of yourself and that’s all he’s ever wanted. Seeing that smile - he knows. Letting you go was the best thing he’s ever done for you.

“What are you doing here?”

Taehyung’s hoarse voice forces your eyes off the ceiling onto your side where he’s currently hugging his pillow, messy hair and pouty lips on display.

“Trying to get some rest after I saved your drunk ass last night,” you bitterly respond. “I got to you before any compromising photos or videos were taken. You’re welcome.”

“Hmm, thanks,” he groans. “But uh, why are you here? Didn’t you say you wanted proper rest in your house before seeing your family today?”

“Right, uh… you see. Yoongi drove us here, and then he asked if I wanted a ride home but I kinda panicked and said I’m sleeping over so… Here I am!” You laugh, unconvincingly. “My rental car’s on the way here. I’ll drive to my house and then go to my dad’s.”

“Ugh, you’re so dumb,” he says, sinking into his comforter. You gasp in response. “That was your chance to be alone with him but you didn’t take the offer. We both know you wanted to.”

“Tae, being drunk and not holding anything back doesn’t mean you can just assume things like that,” you respond, sitting up and frowning at him. “I didn’t want to be alone with him, that’s why I’m here!”

“Why didn’t you want to be alone with him?” He answers back.

“Uhm, why would I want to?” You ask incredulously. “Since when was getting in a car alone with an ex ever a good idea?”

“Why? You’re afraid you’d kiss him if you did?”

You scowl at your best friend. “I should’ve left you there drunk with possible penis drawings on your face.”

“Just being honest. It’s not like you’ve never done that with him before,” he shrugs.

“I hate you.”

“I know. But you’ll love me later on. At least I’m still half asleep.”

You push him awake, the stress heightening now as the previous night plays in your head.

“Tae! What happened to my hi, goodbye plan?!” You groan. “I was literally just supposed to say hi and then be civil, like, acknowledge his presence but not be affected by it. But then we had some small talk and he drove us home.”

“We all know it was a denial plan,” he huffs. “It was bound to fail.”

“Gee, thanks. You’re being incredibly helpful right now,” you frown again.

“Fine,” he grumbles, sitting now. “You had small talk, he drove you here. How are those affecting you and why are you making it a big deal?”

“I’m not making it a big deal,” you point out.

“You kinda are.”

“No, I’m not.”

“You are because that’s how things started before. And you’re afraid that one small misstep will cause you to fall for him all over again, fast and hard, because that’s how you are when it comes to him.”

“You’re hungover and tired so your judgment is impaired,” you say, crossing your arms. “You remember what happened after all that. I’ll be perpetually grateful that you never pushed me to talk about it unless I was drunk and couldn’t remember things but I was heartbroken, Tae. And then I was numb. It took a while before I started to feel again.”

“I know,” he says, taking you in his arms now as he holds you like a baby - a rare occurrence, as this often happens the other way around. “And I can never fault you for it because even if it was like that summer fling that only happened in the movies, I know you loved him, genuinely and intensely, and a love like that stays with you. But he’s got a good life here, ___, and you’ve got an amazing one in Seoul. You just have to remember why it didn’t work out in the first place and make sure you don’t fall into that trap again. Just… acknowledge that. For your sake. And then do what you need to do so you don’t make the same mistakes again.”

Enveloped in his warmth, you take in your best friend’s words. He may still be hungover and may also be confused but his comfort never seizes, and it’s one of the reasons why you love him dearly.

“So yeah, good on you I guess for not taking that ride with him. Maybe staying away and keeping your distance might be good,” he adds.

Your silence somehow alarms him, so he nudges you. “It’s a good idea, right?”

“I don’t know. Suddenly I feel like staying away and keeping my distance will let him know that it still affects me. He’ll always know me like that,” you sigh, hugging him tightly for more comfort. “And there’s this part of me that wants to show him that I’m fine, you know? That even with everything that happened between us, I walked away from it knowing what I deserve, and that’s someone who’ll fight through life with me. He didn’t and that’s on him but he had his reasons, and looking back, maybe he was right. Maybe he had to let me go, and maybe - because I loved him genuinely and intensely - I want to show him that it wasn’t all in vain. And that I’m happy. Even without him.”

“You don’t need to prove anything to him, you know?”

Maybe I want to prove it to myself, you don’t say. There’s a stubbornness in you that doesn’t go away.

“This isn’t about him, is it?” Taehyung levels his head with you.

For someone hungover, he still knows you pretty well.

You just sigh and fall back in his arms. He doesn’t push you. He just hugs you again until you both fall back in bed and he can comfortably curl his body all over you because it’s Taehyung and he likes to do this.

“Just be careful, alright?” He pleads.

“You know I also kinda don’t have a choice,” you reply. “It’s a small town and we’re bound to see each other. Jungkook and Namjoon have a game here again in a few weeks and that means another get together.”

“Yeah, but you know what I mean.”

You hum. “Promise me you’ll be by my side whatever happens?”

“Always, you stubborn woman. I’m the one person who’ll never leave you even if you push me away.”

The lunch with your family is how you expect it to go - with your older sisters making some backhanded comments about your fame and how you’ve been “too busy” to even visit, and your father trying to dissolve the tension. He’s at least genuinely curious about how you’ve been, asking if you’re eating well and getting enough rest. Your stepmom raves about your drama series and shares that she cried during the finale.

“Why did he have to go back to his planet?” Garam’s 7-year old asks after your stepmom narrates what happened.

“His time on earth was up,” you explain. “He finished his mission and he had to leave.”

“But why didn’t he stay if he was happy?”

“Because he had a responsibility in his home,” you smile. “He wasn’t made for this world.”

“He didn’t have a choice, sweetie,” Garam adds after her daughter comments that it was sad. “That’s understandable. Some people leave because they’re no longer happy with those around them. Or because their dreams are more important than those they supposedly love. Isn’t that sadder?”

“It is. Don’t leave me, Mama,” the little one pouts.

“Oh sweetie, I never will. I don’t leave people that I love,” Garam responds, glancing at you to make a statement.

You zone out after that, not wanting to engage with your sisters anymore. You play with their kids, though, who get excited when they see you on TV. You don’t want to treat them like you hold a grudge against them even if you do so with their mothers. Your sisters continue to do that with you - resent you when it’s your mom they’re really angry at for leaving your already unhappy family after she got her dream job in Paris. You were never angry though but you did sort of follow in her footsteps, and your sisters hated you even more because of that.

“Are you staying for dinner?” Your father asks, the hope in his eyes hurting you.

Things weren’t going well with your parents for a while, giving your mom more reason to leave, but you always wished that he had done more for you to feel loved in the home that started to become toxic after it fell apart, but you suppose he was just trying to heal his own broken heart after his wife left. It felt like your sisters weren’t going to forgive you when you decided to leave yourself, and he just let you walk away without making sure you knew he still loved you despite your decision.

He’s moved on now, though, and happy with someone who prioritizes him and his needs. But too much time and distance can pull people apart - you can see them without the desire of being with them. That’s the reality with you and him now and there’s not much you can do about it.

“No, I’ve got other plans,” you respond, glancing at your sisters who return your look with bitterness. “I’ll see you at grandpa’s tomorrow.”

You drive around for half an hour with no destination in mind. It’s nice to see how much this place has changed and discover which parts of it still feel the same.

You pass by an antique shop - the antique shop, a generations-old family-run store that used to be the hub of imported furniture that the townspeople once flocked to. It’s now a speciality store that still sells one-of-a-kind items but it also refurbishes old pieces. You see a poster on the window that’s promoting woodworking workshops. You won’t be surprised to find out whose idea that was.

A man briefly exits, and you stop near the front, wanting to just take it in. He’s got more gray hair now and walks a little slower but he looks just like you remembered - soft crinkled eyes, comforting smile, a look that you know all too well. You decide to enter, as you’re desperate for something - anything - that feels more like home than the one you just came from.

“May I help you?” The man asks.

“A greeting and a hug would do,” you look up at him and smile.

“___?!” He gasps, walking outside the counter to get closer to you. “Is that really you, my dear?”

“Yes it is, Mr. Min,” you smile, returning the hug that you requested. “Just passing by my favorite antique shop in town. How are you doing?”

“Great! Business is stable and I’ve still got a lot of fight in me to continue,” he chuckles. “How about you? The big city treating you good?”

“It is,” you reply. “I think I’m doing quite okay there.”

“Ah, well it should be treating you amazingly. That’s what you deserve.”

You continue the conversation, with you asking about his latest projects and him, talking about his furniture and wood like his children, pride laced in his voice every time. He asks you about your latest series and if you’ve met his favorite actors and you indulge him. His laughter is music to your ears. You remember spending time here where he worked on his pieces while you talked about your favorite movies.

“Does my son know you’re here?” He asks after a beat of silence.

“He does. I saw him last night. He looks well.”

“He does, doesn’t he? It took a while but he’s doing much better than before - smiling, joking around, helping me at the shop, talking about basketball again. It’s nice to see.”

The words hit you in ways you didn’t expect. Breaking up with Yoongi was tough to get over. Those last few months had been incredibly hard and so many times you thought that maybe if you’d been more patient, maybe things would’ve turned out differently.

But you remember how during those last days with him, he’d lost the glimmer in his eyes and the softness of his smile. Not even you could bring those back. His passion for things just dwindled; he stopped wanting more, stopped wanting you, stopped thinking that things could still work out for him after what he suffered through.

You’d kept in touch with Namjoon and Jungkook at their insistence, and they’d been the one to update you on how Yoongi was doing. Not a lot of details but just general things like the jobs he took and that he was keeping himself busy and that he was trying to get back on the court. It wasn’t with unpleasant stories, though - you learned about his new girlfriend from them, and that he didn’t play basketball for awhile, and that during the toughest days, he considered giving it up altogether.

You knew he’d done well. You learned that from the guys, too. But hearing it from his father is different; you can’t imagine how it must’ve been like for Mr. Min to see his son start to change from what he used to be. But you know that as the good father that he is, he made sure that Yoongi knew he wasn’t alone.

“And that’s good to hear,” you say. “Yoongi deserves all the happiness this world can give. I’m glad that he’s found his joy in basketball again it seems. And that he found it here.”

“He has, but I guess something will always be missing. He’s a lot better but he’s not the same. A parent would know, you know? The flame doesn’t shine as bright,” Mr. Min answers, the tinge of sadness in his eyes hurting you a little.

But you just nod. His words seem to mean more but you don’t want to know what it is.

“Dad, what did you want me to look at?”

Yoongi’s voice echoes in the shop and you can’t help but turn to him who’s just entered and looks as shocked as his father was earlier.

You have a soft smile on, and Mr. Min knows not to intervene.

“Oh, nothing,” he says, thinking that the new wood he acquired could wait. “Just watch over the counter for me while I check something inside, alright Son?”

He doesn’t let the younger man answer and just heads to the back, leaving you and Yoongi alone. He walks closer but keeps his distance. It’s enough for you to appreciate the softness of his face, though. His presence had always been reassuring; you see him twice and you’ve felt more comfort with him than you have in months. You don’t know how he does it, but that shouldn’t surprise you anymore. This isn’t the first time anyway.

“Is Taehyung alright?” He breaks the silence.

“Recovering, but more from his parents giving him shit for drinking too much,” you chuckle. “He got an earful and Mrs. Kim said she won’t let him in the house next time he gets that drunk. He’s doing chores as punishment.”

“Ah, well it’s been a while. It was nice to spend time with everyone again.”

“It was,” you smile now.

“And you? Are you okay?” He asks, sincerity laced in his low voice.

“Yeah, of course.”

It’s the hesitant nod and the way your eyes look at anything but him, and he knows that whatever happened after last night is something you want to forget or seek comfort for. So he asks.

“So what made you come here? To the shop, I mean.”

“I was driving around. It didn’t register to me right away that I was in the area,” you respond. “And this place was always so calming for me, you know? The smell of wood, your dad’s stories…”

You.

“So I thought I’d come in”, you continue. “He hasn’t changed. It’s nice to see him.”

Yoongi always wondered what parts of you remained the same and which parts didn’t.

Perhaps the playfulness tempered a bit. You seem a little more anxious than he remembers, too. There’s this sophistication about you that was always too good for this small town, and he sees that even more now. Your smile is still soft but it isn’t as bright. He won’t deny that it still makes his heart race, though.

You have a habit of going somewhere familiar to seek comfort. You always looked for it in places, he noticed - in that dingy convenience store near your school, in your town’s secondhand bookstore even if you don’t like reading, in the Opera House where you and your mom used to go to. Yoongi learns now that that hasn’t changed at all. You’re in his dad’s store, a place you always wanted to go to after spending time with your family, and he supposes that’s where you came from.

He doesn’t know if he’s still someone you find comfort in and he doesn’t know if you even want to spend time with him after all these years, but he doesn’t have the heart to just let you walk out of here not knowing if you’re truly okay.

He hated leaving you alone then when things weren’t good. You didn’t always want to talk but you said once that just hearing him breathing on the other end of the phone or just having his hand over yours made you feel better. He may not be the right person now but he’s still someone, and that’s always better than no one.

You eye the door, ready to leave, but his call of your name prompts you to look back at him.

“Do you have somewhere to be?” He asks.

“No, not really,” you reply.

“Would you like to grab some coffee?”

The words are familiar. You hate that you remember everything about it.

“Just coffee?” You ask, almost teasingly.

He chuckles softly and meets your eyes, and somehow a part of you thinks that you shouldn’t do this. But you’re glad he asked in the first place.

“Yes, ___. Just coffee.”

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#yoongi fic #yoongi angst #yoongi fluff #yoongi smut #yoongi x reader #yoongi x you #min yoongi #yoongi fanfic #bts suga #yoongi fanfiction #exes to lovers #exes au

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bluemoth698 · 7 months

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Double post today, here's my take on Underswap Mettaton, the form on the left, Mettaton EX, is swapped with Mad Mew Mew, and the form on the right, Mettaton PRIME, is swapped with Mad Dummy

Mettaton PRIME was created by Dr. Undyne to assist Alphys in the royal guard, so Mettaton is Alphys's sidekick in the royal guard, and the brawn to her brains. Mettaton likes to be overdramatic when confronting enemies, making a big performance out of the fight.

As for Mettaton EX, with the design I was definitely going for kind of a shojo anime love interest vibe, as i thought that'd fit very well for the mew mew swap. I haven't quite decided what the body is, perhaps it's a fashion mannequin rather than a doll? I'm not too sure on that yet.

I don't have as many pictures as i normally do with these, i haven't drawn him as much as the other characters

As always, special thanks to ChrisTheRaccTamer for his tweaks to the sprites, and as always, feel free to ask me any questions you have about the AU!

#underswap #undertale #undertale art #my undertale au #underswap take #undertale au #undertale fanart #sprite art #undertale au art #utdr #mettaton #underswap mettaton #mettaton ex #mettaton fanart #mettaton au #mettaton undertale #mtt #undertale mtt #BT!Underswap

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pascaloverx · 23 days

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OUR SECRET — MYG

chapter seven

Summary: You and Yoongi are having an affair. No, you are not being his lover. But the world is not ready to know that an idol is dating someone. So you two were doing your best to make sure no one found out. Until he breaks up with you. His mistake.

Author's note: This fanfic will contain inappropriate language and intimate moments between some characters. Be warned. I will let you know if anything becomes inappropriate. Please enjoy this Yoongi fanfic.

PREVIOUS NEXT

To marry without love must be terrible. To marry with love seems better, but everything depends on the conditions in which one gets married. If you're stressed because you're about to give birth to an unplanned daughter with a love that no longer serves you, and a fake marriage is your only solution, marrying seems like hell. Unfortunately, you're discovering this the hard way. At least you and your daughter are doing well health-wise. Namjoon and Jin keep checking in to make sure you're taking care of yourself, while Hoseok and the younger ones try to help with the marriage. The fans of the group that your daughter's father is a part of have surprisingly accepted well the fact that you're pregnant with Yoongi and that you're getting married. Everyone bought into the story of marrying out of love and the pregnancy being the result of a cute hidden formal relationship. The wedding with Yoongi was quick and without much fuss. Your belly is too big, time is short so a short wedding was perfect.

"I think this is the last box. Who knew I'd be moving into your house, pregnant with your baby and married to you. It doesn't feel real." You say organizing your last moving box while Yoongi organizes the baby's room.

"I finished setting up our daughter's room. I think it looks nice..." Yoongi comments as he watches you organize the rest of the clothes in the wardrobe.

"Can we talk for a bit?" You ask, sitting down on the corner of Yoongi's bed, which will soon be your bed together.

"We've barely been married, and we're already going to have a serious conversation?" Yoongi tries to be funny, but you look at him somewhat indifferent.

"I think some things need to be talked about. We're almost at a stage where another human being will depend exclusively on us. I think it's important that you know you'll have to be involved in Ji-soo's life. And I know it's premature, but I think Min Ji-soo, a beautiful name, and since I'm carrying her, then..." You speak defensively but without getting worked up.

"You notice that in this relationship, we should be a team and not rivals, right?" Yoongi speaks, taking a strand of his hair that was touching his eyes, while you look at him. You don't know if you're mad at him or if you agree with him.

"This whole situation is crazy. I dated you because I loved you and now we're married and I feel like I'm at the point where I'm stopping loving you. We need to fix this before the baby arrives." You say getting physically closer to Yoongi, your hand held his.

"What is your suggestion?" Yoongi asks holding her hand. A silly smile appeared on his face and you felt shy for a moment.

"May we try to be peaceful with each other. Maybe we can be bold too." You say, raising your hand to Yoongi's neck, pulling him into a kiss. A kiss that reminded you of what it was like to love him, making you feel intoxicated by the sensation of kissing Yoongi.

However, a sudden pain makes you pull away from Yoongi, letting out a groan of pain. It almost felt like your baby was kicking your belly, but usually, that didn't cause such intense pain. When you look down, you see blood on your pants, staining the floor of the room. Yoongi looks at you terrified, and you feel a sense of panic engulfing you.

"Yoongi, I'm not feeling well. I think there's something wrong with our girl." You say, feeling another pang of pain in your belly and slowly becoming dizzy. The pain was so intense that you almost blacked out when trying to stand up.

"Jagiya, listen to me. Let's go to the hospital, but I need you, for the sake of our daughter and yourself, to try to stay conscious." Yoongi says, grabbing the bag they had prepared for the baby and the car keys.

"If something happens, take care of our daughter for me. I know you'll be a good father." You say, feeling like you'll lose consciousness soon. The little strength you have, you use to gently touch your belly, as if saying goodbye to your little girl.

"I don't know what you're talking about. You and I are going to be great parents, together. I promise you that everything will be fine." You hear Yoongi say, so you look at him and touch his face. A last caress before the uncertain end. And then everything fades away, and you see nothing more.

To be continued...

#yoongi x reader #min yoongi x reader #bts fanfic #min yoongi fanfic #min yoongi x you #min yoongi #jungkook #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #taehyung #jung hoseok #park jimin #bts series #bts angst #yoongi angst #min yoongi angst #ex to lovers #future parents au #Spotify

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bykshre · 8 months

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STILL WITH YOU ll JJK - 001

CHAPTER 001 ll 2.05K words (song - I Feel It Coming, The Weeknd)

Pairing - CEO Jungkook x Head Of Department Y/N

Synopsis - 7 years ago, you and jungkook broke up after a long-term relationship in high school and college. Never have you ever thought that one day, you would reunite with your ex-lover or the guy you once believed was the love of your life. What does fate hold for the both of you?

Genre/tropes - exes to lovers, angst, slow burn, grumpyxsunshine, a second chance.

Rating - M

Warnings- panic attacks, crying, flirty prologue, alcohol, break up mentions, insomnia. All are mild mentions. Not too severe.

Masterpost | Next

prologue

21st August

I had no classes today, and Y/N did. I took the opportunity to decorate the living room with balloons and many of our pictures together. And when I say many, I mean all of them. Be it selfies, cuddle pictures, date pictures or the randomest pictures Y/N and I took of each other in weird situations. I managed to include every single one of them. I live and breathe to see her happy. She matters a lot to me.

After pouring my heart into the house adornments, I plopped myself on the couch and reflected on the pictures I hung on the walls. One of the pictures caught my attention, the first picture Y/N and I took on our date. We were so young and full of love. Nothing changed anyway.

I permanently kept that picture of us in my wallet. It was so special to me. Our very first date. A cliche photo booth picture. It was so unadorned, but it was unforgettable at the same time. Who wouldn't want to relive that?

.......

4.20 p.m.

I stood in front of our apartment door. Holding a bouquet of roses in my hands.

Shock was graced on Y/Ns face. She looked so happy. I could even see tears welling up in her eyes. Y/N was never a fussy lady or a spoilt brat. She was simple. She never sought for extravagance. She loved the most diminutive things I did. That's what I cherished about her - her unwavering simplicity. She's a gem, rare to find.

"I love you!" I saw Y/N running towards me and hugging me. Lone gone was the flower bouquet. Our kisses and giggles filled the room's ambience. "Happy 5th Anniversary, love." She peppered tender kisses onto my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

"Y/Niee, that's enough of the kisses. I chucked. "Y/N, how about we start getting ready? We have a date tonight. Plus, I bought a dress for you, which I think you'll adore. You'll be looking like a diva in it." Y/N frowned for a moment. I giggled at her state. She gets upset often when I spoil her with luxurious items. "Just for tonight, love, you deserve it today." I leaned into her and gave her a tender yet aggressive kiss on her ravishingly tempting reddish lips.

......

"What do you think?" Y/N said while leaning on the kitchen counter. I scanned her from head to toe. She looked gorgeous in that red dress accompanied by the long slit at her legs. The crimson fabric drapes softly over her form, embracing her contours with a tailored precision that accentuates her every curve. The richness of the red hue not only complements her skin's natural glow but also exudes an air of confidence and charisma. She looked like a goddess.

"I could have you as main course, mi amour," I said in a flirty tone. She blushed. I saw her cheeks turning crimson red. I love how only I could make her a blushing mess. She was always mine.

"Jungkook!!" She said in a flustered manner. "We're getting late!"

"Don't say that love. I know you enjoyed it." I winked at her. She was a blushing mess.

"Love, you are looking like a Greek god yourself! You are so handsome!" She said while checking me out, not giving an absolute fuck that I noticed she was drooling over my attire and looks tonight. "Your tux perfectly addresses your body shape." She said while pulling me into a hungry, aggressive kiss. Glad to know we're on the same page.

"Are you ready? Let's go." We interlocked our hands, creating a connection that felt unbreakable. "Ready!" I chuckled at her behaviour. She's carefree and happy. She drives me insane but in the most enchanting manner.

"You better be love. We have the whole night awaiting. You'll see stars tonight." I winked again, igniting a spark of intimacy between us.

We laughed, savouring each moment of the day. That's something I treasured about our relationship. We love hard.

"Love you". "I love you too".

Present

JK pov.

"I love you, Y/N, I always will. That's a promise I'll never leave you. Ever."

"I love you too, Jungkook. You will forever be the love of my life. Nothing will be able to make us apart."

One. Two. Three. My eyes opened. I felt a salty bead of water slipping from my eyes. Trailing down my cheeks. I was crying. Again. At this point, it had just become a routine for me. Ever since that day, I have never been able to sleep properly. And even if I would, it was because of the help of alcohol. I miss her and crave her touch. But what she has done has created a massive hatred for her. All those promises and words were false.

I opened my phone to check the time. It was 4.32 a.m. I definitely won't be able to sleep after this. But I needed it desperately. After mulling for a few minutes, I opened my Spotify playlist and clicked 'play' on a playlist she made for us. It was titled "Midnight Love". It would always help me to calm down. These are the traces of items she left with me. And I would never let them go.

♫ You don't need a lonely night

So, baby, I can make it right

You just got to let me try

To give you what you want. ♫

I mentally laughed at the lyrics. Remembering the sight of us back in the day. Sure, we were very horny. But we did have a fair share of emotional rollercoasters. The most important part was that we were there for each other. I do wonder how she's doing. Without me...

Is there someone who can actually love her? Before I could react or think anything else. My eyelids fell heavy with the weight of drowsiness. I eventually drifted off to sleep, welcoming a set of dreams.

"Y/N, you drive me insane."

Y/N pov.

4.32 a.m.

I laughed. Danced. Sang my heart out to "I Feel It Coming". Jimin and I decided to host a party at our apartment with our close friends, Taehyung, Mina and Namjoon. I was absolutely drunk. A mess, broken mess. All thanks to alcohol. We couldn't give an absolute fuck that we had work tomorrow. Emotions were uprising. We were immersed in our feelings. I rarely consented to these parties and would usually be sleeping or watching Netflix. Despite that, a part of my heart said, "Y/N, you deserve this fun, be yourself, express your emotions."

♫ You've been scared of love

And what it did to you

You don't have to run

I know what you've been through

Just a simple touch

And it can set you free

We don't have to rush

When you're alone with me ♫

Although I was super drunk and giggling the whole time, a tiny part of my heart clenched at the lyrics. It held some truth to it. I kinda miss him. No, I miss him... a lot. Whatever. The past is the past. I must move on.

"Hey! Y/N, let's dance, just us," Jimin asked. Everyone else had already left. I was so submerged in my feelings I didn't notice it. Busy reminiscing the beautiful past. "Oh yeah, Jiminiee sureee. Would your girlfriend slash whatever be fine with that?" I said while giggling because I knew that Jimin wasn't the guy who pursued relationships. Whatever interactions he had with women were just to please his sexual desires. Nothing else.

Jimin took me into his arms while I slid my hands around his waist.

The song playing at the back had turned into a faint sound playing at the back. I couldn't hear anything anymore.

♫ You've been scared of love

And what it did to you

You don't have to run

I know what you've been through♫

Oh no... my emotions are controlling me.

The alcohol is starting to get to me. I couldn't hold it back. Jimin noticed me acting weird. My head spun. I couldn't maintain my balance anymore. Jimin's grip on me tightened. I sank my head into his chest. There was it. I started crying. I rarely had meltdowns. But if something triggered them, I would easily have a breakdown. I started blabbing.

"Jiminie, do you know how much I miss him? I would run back to him in seconds? I would cuddle him at night to comfort him and keep his insomnia away? I still remember him vividly." I said shakily. "I wish I could have changed what happened that day. But I couldn't. I wish all of those things were fake. Apparently, it isn't. I should hate him. But my heart never brought me to that feeling. What is wrong with me?"

My breathing became shallow. I knew I would pass out soon.

"Y/N, Are you there with me?" I definitely passed out by the looks of it.

I could feel my back pressed on a soft, comfy mattress. The duvet, a cocoon of warmth and solace, draped over me like a protective shield, its weight a soothing embrace that banished the remnants of weariness. Jimin must have carried me to my room. He placed a glass of water, a bucket, and a strip of pills on my bedstand for tomorrow. "Goodnight, Y/N, sweet dreams.

I mumbled, "Jungkookie, I love you." I went to my dreamland.

Jimin laughed at that. He knew how you still miss him. He whispered to himself. "Your Jungkookie must be missing you too, Y/Nie."

"Just hang in there."

The universe has a silly way of reminding you of certain people. Two ex-lovers were reminded of the same memory. Was it a coincidence or fate?

Taglist : @lovingkoalaface @jk97bam @slapmy4head @vinuhsha

Thank you lovely people ❤️

This is only a beginning chap so it will take time to develop the characters and don't worry yn and jungkook will meet... Soon.

Till then. #Stillwithyoubykshre

#jungkook #bts jungkook #bts #bts smut #bts ff #jeon jungkook au #jungkook x reader #reader x jeon jungkook #Jungkook jeon #Bts army #Second chance #Exes to lovers #Exes #Lovers #Jungkook au #Still with you jungkook #Still with you #Still with you bykshre

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pt2change · 8 months

Text

between the seconds ; min yoongi

[gif source]

pairing: min yoongi x reader

genre: exes, angst. angst. angst. mentions of soulmates, yoongi is sad :(, ft jimin cameo

word count: 784

a/n: feedback is appreciated <3 i hope this makes sense i made it when i couldn’t fall asleep

↣ bts masterlist

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

if yoongi believed in such a thing, he would say you were the closest thing to being his soulmate.

he feels it all the way right down to his bones

it’s sometime in the middle of the night and he’s sitting up on his mattress, gasping for air

he’s drowning.

he feels empty too, like a part of him is missing.

it’s been so long since he really truly felt like himself, but this feeling was different. more intensifying.

his heart is beating too fast inside his chest in a way that hurts

and he just knows, he does.

he’s lying on the mattress in his cold lonely apartment, which now feels to big without you in it.

but he’s on his own now, like he was way before you happened

except the loneliness now feels suffocating

and yoongi drinks himself back to sleep with a bottle of whiskey that’s been sitting in his kitchen cabinet

and when the news spread about your wedding, it reaches yoongi in a sort of sad whisper

his best friend jimin comes over, and yells at him to get up and move on with his life

after all it was because of yoongi that the two of you aren’t together anymore

now he’s so full of regret and just stares blankly as jimin lectures him

he doesn’t know what to say. his heart feels like it’s been ripped out of his chest

his emotions are so overwhelming, he doesn’t feel like he can be a fully functioning human being.

yoongi doesn’t trust himself to open his mouth, so he walks out of his apartment and leaves jimin standing the middle of his living room

he heads towards a small bar that’s down the street, and drinks until he’s numb and the owner is pushing him out

days later, he finds a polaroid picture of the two of you taken on a random night underneath his dresser

yoongi tortures himself looking at it over and over again

you both looked so happy and in love, and his mind flashes to the last time he saw you with tears running down your cheeks and your face flushed

he stares at it until there’s a lump in his throat and his chest feels too tight

he tries to throw the picture away a few times but he ends up placing it on his bedside table

“yoongi, when was the last time you ate?” jimin asks him the next time he’s at his apartment

yoongi can’t even remember if he opened the door or if jimin just simply walked in

he can’t remember the last day he went to work and earned money to buy himself groceries and cooked a meal

in fact, he can’t remember the last time he swallowed something that wasn’t alcohol

“leave me alone” he tells jimin, covering himself with the blanket you had left on his couch.

yoongi doesn’t complain an hour later when jimin gives him a bowl of scolding hot soup he made with whatever was in the fridge

it all comes back when yoongi opens the instagram app and sees the stories and posts of your mutual friends at your wedding

videos of you and your husband laughing, dancing, kissing

he clicks on the next story where the camera had zoomed in on your face and you smiled so big, your laugh filling his quiet living room

and yoongi’s mind replays so many memories with that same exact laugh and he can’t tear his eyes away

and he tries to stop himself from crying, he wants to but he can’t.

just like he can’t throw out the picture of the two of you, or the blanket you would wrap yourself in, or the clothes that you left behind

and he messed it all up, he messed up any chance to fix it with you

it’s too late now.

he finds himself crouched over on the couch, head in his hands, and he can taste the salt on his tongue

he’s crying.

even when he wants to get up and walk away to avoid seeing jimin’s face when he realizes yoongi is crying over his ex, he forgets how to work his muscles

yoongi can’t leave because his attention is on you and your beautiful smile and the contagious laugh on the screen

he remembers the way your lips curved up when you smiled

he remembers the way your hands curled around his biceps when you would walk together

he remembers the way your lips moved when you would speak to him

and yoongi can’t stop staring.

in that same moment, yoongi realized that he remembers every single detail about you.

he memorized it all.

and even though he doesn’t believe in soulmates, the day you left him, was the day you took all of min yoongi with you.

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jungk0oksthighs · 2 years

Text

Stay With Me | Forgotten Memories

exhusband!jungkook, singledad!jungkook, E2L, angst, smut, fluff

Word count: 3.2k

Two years after your divorce you still struggle with the realities of co-parenting. Warnings: Swearing, angst, mentions of divorce & relationship breakdown

MINIERIES COLLECTION

The drive to your ex-husband’s new apartment is always something you dread. Jungkook lives almost forty minutes away by car, you’re a little over halfway now and thankfully your son Seol is far too invested in something on his phone to notice your distain.

Jeon Jungkook, where do you even begin?

It was a classic tale of love at first sight, except the two of you were actually dating other people when you met. Jungkook had been with his girlfriend Pearl for almost three years at that point, they were high school sweethearts who moved in together for college. But it wasn��t all sunshine and romance, in fact, Pearl had been cheating on him throughout the course of their relationship with almost all of his ‘friends’ he played football with. He didn’t know that the night you met though, nor did you.

As for you, that fateful night you were in your first year of college – two years younger than Jungkook. You were shy and quiet, still adjusting to the lifestyle being a student had to offer. It didn’t help that your boyfriend Yoongi went to a different college, more than six thousand miles away from your new life. In a dark yet comedic twist of fate it turned out that Yoongi had also been unfaithful, but again, you weren’t aware of that when you initially met Kook, nor was he.

The memory of your first encounter with Jungkook still plays clearly in your head, even after all these years. You were in the library one Wednesday night trying to find a book from your reading list, you can’t even remember which class it was for now. There you were, skimming the shelves with brows pinched together in concentration until you found it, the large leather bound book dusty beneath your fingertips when you gripped it. Except you weren’t the only one hoping to check out that book.

From the other side of the shelf Jungkook looked for the biggest, heaviest looking book he could find, one that looked old and dusty so he could be certain nobody would want to check it out any time soon. He needed a new spider killer, giving that he’d lost the previous book he used. It’s funny really, how a man so muscular and fierce looking could be absolutely terrified of spiders. But he was, he still is. His method of getting rid of them is a little unorthodox, throwing the heaviest, biggest non-breakable object he can at them and praying it crushes them so he doesn’t have to deal with it at a close range. Hence the desire to take the enormous, heavy duty looking book you already had your hands on.

“Oh-,” You remember his surprise to find someone wanting the same reading material as him, “I’m sorry this ones taken...” He’d said with the faintest smirk, you could barely see him through the row of books but you sure do recall those big, chocolate doe-eyes trying to catch a glimpse of the person he’d labelled as the book thief. A nick name that stuck throughout your fifteen year relationship, twelve of which being married.

“I’m sorry… I need this for my assignment. It’s due next Friday, can I have it until then?” You were so painfully shy back then, hands growing clammy at the prospect of being a burden to someone, “I can give you it when I’ve finished my paper… I won’t need it for long. Just a couple days.”

It was like time itself stopped, the world stood still and the faint voices of other students became nothing more than white noise. Your heart hammered inside your chest, breath hitching in your throat when the owner of the voice made his way round the shelf with big, tattooed arms folded over his chest.

“You promise? Just a couple of days?” His voice was honeyed, there was something about his demeanour that softened as soon as he looked at you. He was stunning. At the time you felt guilty for finding another man attractive, giving you had a boyfriend, but Jungkook was… Something else. His hair was long enough to tickle his hooded eyelids, his big body towered over yours but in a non-threatening way, and his face and muscles looked as though they were carved by horny angels.

“Promise.” You nodded with a coy smile that made the man weak at the knees.

He smiled, a breath taking, panty-dropping gorgeous smile, “What’s your name? I don’t think I’ve seen you in here before.”

“Y/N… I’m a first year so I haven’t been here long…” A bashful chuckle escaped your lips, “What’s your name?”

“Jungkook. I’m a third year... So what’s your major?”

The day before your wedding Jungkook had sent you a video of himself, kind of like a vlog but not in an obnoxious ‘hi guys welcome back to my channel’ way. He was sitting in his college apartment, one you recognised straight away. It was recorded barely an hour after your first interaction with him. The final year student was tipsy, flashing his signature bunny-like grin to the camera wearing khaki pyjamas that were almost sheer.

“Hi Jungkook,” He nodded with confidence toward the camera, proceeding to tell the time and date, “I know this is crazy, but I just bumped into this girl… She was…” He sighed with an open smile, shaking his head in disbelief, “She was amazing. A little shy but I’m sure her and I are going to become good friends one day… I can’t explain it, ahh. She was like… I don’t know. All I do know is that I feel drawn to her, yknow? Not like that I would never cheat on Pearl… Well, maybe like that? She was beautiful. I mean she is beautiful, unless she died in the last hour… I don’t know why I said was. Y/N is beautiful. Y/N... Maybe I’m just lonely and overthinking things since Pearl and I aren’t in a good place right now. I’m drunk, I’m not sure why I’m even filming this… I just know that I wanted to,... But Jungkook listen to me, this is serious. That girl is going to be special to you one day, I just know it.”

And special you were, because the day after you watched that very video you officially became Mrs Jeon.

And now, after the hardest heartbreak you’ve ever faced – Mrs Jeon is no longer who you are.

“Are you coming inside?” Seol asks innocently when you pull up to Jungkook’s apartment complex, dragging you back to the present, “My bag is kinda heavy since I brought my Playstation.”

You stop yourself from rolling your eyes with a small smile, Seol is always trying to get you and his father in the same room together one way or another, “Okay I’ll carry your bag up for you.”

“Yesss!” He grinned, clambering outside the car with a little too much enthusiasm.

Every other week you and Jungkook swap parental responsibility. Even after two years of co-parenting, it’s still painful. You hate being away from Seol, and Jungkook presumably feels the same way when Seol is with you… But this is the new normal, whether you want it to be or not. Two years since the divorce and yet when he swings his front door open wearing a plain black t shirt and jeans of the same colour, everything comes rushing back. The laughs, the cries, the love, the hurt. Everything.

“Y/N…?” Jungkook grins, quickly clearing his throat in an attempt to hide the pleasant surprise washing his features, “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

You inhale, lifting the large bag Seol has packed for the week, “Playstation’s heavy.”

“Oh here I’ll take that.” Your ex-husband pries the weekend case from your grip, “You want a coffee? Or a green tea? …Or any drink?” He’s frowning, awkwardly biting down on his lip, clearly embarrassed of his attempt to lure you inside.

“Please mom?” Seol slips past you, the pair of them grinning widely at you with identical expressions – like they’ve been copied and pasted.

“I should really be heading back… I’ve got—” You cut your sentence short with an apologetic smile, truth is you have a date this evening and need to start getting ready as soon as you can. But you don’t have the heart to mention that in front of your son, or your ex-husband. “You know what, sure, I’ll have a quick drink.”

“Okay!” Kook ushers you quickly into his home, and you’re sure it’s so you can’t change your mind.

You’ve only been inside his apartment a handful of times, usually during the pick-up/drop-off hand over of your son. The last time you were here was Seol’s birthday. Every year since he was a little boy you and Kook made him funfetti pancakes for breakfast on his birthday, and despite the divorce that’s one tradition you’ve at least manage to keep. The apartment it small, two bedrooms – his and Seol’s. It’s mostly open planned but compared to your big beautiful home it feels… lonely.

“So do you have plans for this weekend?” Jungkook asks when you perch yourself on a stool in front of the breakfast bar. Seol has already ran off to his bedroom, presumably to unpack for the week.

Nodding slowly you meet Kook’s gaze, he’s looking at you intently as though there’s a million things on his mind, “Same old really…” You lie, twiddling your thumbs. It’s not that you feel guilty for dating, you’ve been divorced for two years now – but he doesn’t need to know. If he were to openly discuss his personal and sex life with you it would make you feel awkward, and so you treat him how you expect to be treated and keep him in the dark, “Nothing much, how about you guys?”

“One of those Tiktoker’s he watches is doing a meet and greet tomorrow, I’m being forced to take him.” He chuckles, folding strong, heavily tattooed arms over his chest.

“Rather you than me.” You laugh, thinking fuck that.

“So I’ve got coffee, green tea or coke.”

“Any diet coke?”

“Why would I buy diet? Tastes like shit. Still don’t understand how you can drink it.”

You roll your eyes jokingly, “Green tea it is then.”

Once you have the steaming mug of tea in hand Jungkook sits next to you, nursing a coffee. Black of course, you’re smiling – some things never change, even down to the way he likes his drinks.

“So—”

“How have—”

You both apologise for speaking over the other with a breathy laugh, and he insists that you go first, his chocolate doe-eyes trained to your face.

“How have you been? How’s work?”

At this your ex-husband nods, taking a sip of his coffee, “Good yeah, everything’s good… You know me, always plodding along. How’re things with you?”

“Good thanks… Things are good.” You mirror his movements, the herbal tea is warm and you realise he’s used the fancy teabags you like.

“Have you met someone?” His question catches you off-guard, especially since he asks it so casually as though he’s speaking about the weather.

There’s a lump in your throat all of a sudden, perhaps it’s guilt, maybe even a little sadness. Truthfully tonight is only the third date you’ve been on since the divorce. But you’re finally in a place where you feel ready enough to move on with your life and meet someone new to share it with.

It’s not that you divorced Jungkook because you fell out of love with him, hell when you admire the features on his chiselled face there’s a part of you that still loves him even now. But marriages need more than just love to work; they need support, mutual understanding and even compromises. All the things your marriage lacked, and ultimately the reason you filed for divorce.

You swallow, choosing your next words oh so very carefully, “Not quite… I am going on a date with someone from work though so, yknow maybe.”

“I see…” You don’t miss the flash of disappointment in his eyes, the way his Adam’s apple bobs in his throat, or the way his jaw tenses in discomfort.

“How about you—”

“Nah,” He sighs, almost sounding in pain, “Still gotta work on myself before I even consider getting back out there.”

You tense, knowing exactly what he’s referring to, “I see…”

Jungkook is many things but he’s not the ideal husband or father. He can be selfish, very much so. He’s spoiled and argumentative when he doesn’t get his way. And you disagree on the way you think your son should be raised, that being the biggest contributor to the end of your marriage. Sure he’s the most handsome man you’ve ever known. He can be romantic, he’s sexy, sophisticated and funny… Any woman would be lucky to have him, as soon as he’s finished ironing out his flaws.

“Mom!” Seol unintentionally breaks the tension by jogging into the kitchen somewhat out of breath, much to your relief.

“What’s up?” You turn to him with loving eyes, admiring his cute little face which is only growing more and more handsome by the day. He looks so much like Jungkook sometimes it catches you off guard, especially when his round eyes crinkle from his bright smile. He’s his father’s double.

“Okay, so my friends are all going to the beach and hopefully staying there overnight next weekend for the carnival and I want to go with—”

“Oh do you now? Whose parents are taking you?” You don’t mean to sound blunt, it’s just that there’s only a handful of his friends’ parents that you trust. And something tells you he’s not going to be chaperoned by them, rather the ones you don’t trust.

“Well…”

“Seol?” Jungkook tongues his cheek, clearly sharing your same fear.

“…Actually I was going to ask if you could take us all.” Seol looks between you and his father with eyes swimming in hope, shifting his weight between his feet while waiting for an response.

“Mmm…” Your lips purse, “How many of your friends are planning to go on this mini vacation you’ve planned?”

“Well there’s me plus five of my friends…”

“I can’t possibly keep an eye on six of you Seol… It’s a bit much.” You hate disappointing him, and you despise the disheartened huff that draws from his chest, but there’s no way you can chaperone six children at a carnival. For starters you won’t fit them all in the car, “If you can make it you and three friends I’ll take you and we’ll get a hotel. Is that fair?”

Compromise. Parenting is all about compromise and respect.

“But mooooom!” Another dramatic sigh comes from your son, “We all want to go, please please please?”

You shake your head gently, finishing your green tea, “I can only fit four of you in the car, I’m really sorry… Maybe one of your friend’s moms can take the other two? Actually it would be nice to have some adult company if I’m taking you guys to—”

“I can come with you.” Jungkook interjects, surprising both you and Seol who wear the same dumbfounded expression, “We can pack up the Mercedes, it’s big enough for the six of them in the back and you can ride up front with me.”

“Oh my god! Oh my god!” Seol’s jumping up and down on the spot, his Iron Man socks nearly causing him the slip on the floor tiles, “Mom please can dad take us?!”

“Only if your mom comes with us,” Kook reiterates with a chuckle, rubbing his big bicep with inked fingers, “I can’t possibly watch six of them, like you said… It’s a bit much.”

“Mom! Pleeeaaaase?!”

“Or I can ask my brother to come with me if you’d feel uncomfortable. That’s the last thing I’d want to make you feel.” Jungkook notices your internal struggle before it happens, but you find yourself speaking before you really have time to process what you’re agreeing to.

“No it’s okay I’ll come with you,” You offer your ex a warm smile, a smile he reciprocates and if you didn’t know any better you’d say he looks almost excited by your words, “But I’ll need to speak with everyone’s parents first. Deal?”

“Deal!!!!” Seol dashes off into the corridor, so fast that he almost slips on the floor again.

Kook notices this too, adding “Go careful! Watch where you’re going!” As your son disappears into his bedroom.

“...I should really get going now, thanks for the tea.”

“Right… Big date and all that.” He’s tonguing his cheek again, gazing in a different direction.

You frown, “I never said it was tonight…” It is, but you know that you didn’t tell him that.

“Sorry I just assumed,” He gestures to your body with his fingers, eyes lingering on the bend of your waist in your shirt dress before they finally settle on your face, “You look…”

Standing, you clear your throat before an awkward snigger bubbles your chest, “Well I hope the end of that sentence is good at least.”

Jungkook’s smile reaches his eyes before it tugs his lips, and for a split second you forget how to breathe. After saying goodbye to Seol Kook walks you to the door, opening it for you but you can see there’s a part of him that doesn’t want you to leave. It’s always like this. Tense, a little awkward, so many unspoken truths clouding the air between you. The memories of his lips on yours always fight their way to the front of your mind, especially when his tongue darts out to wet them when he says goodbye.

“I’ll see you next weekend then?” You reach for your car keys, giving him a small wave.

“Beautiful.” Jungkook leans against the doorframe, looking obscenely large against the entrance to his home.

You can’t hide your surprise, brows raised with a cocktail of equal parts confusion and shock when you fiddle with your keys. His eyes bore into your soul, reaching depths inside you that are long forgotten about. Parts of you that ignite for him, and only him.

“You look beautiful.”

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seokjins-luigi · 1 year

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simple thing | mini masterlist | ksj

・ pairing: ex! seokjin x ex!afab!reader

・banner: made by the amazing @gfxstdio

・permanent taglist: @goldenhoney-cas @yuugehn

part one .

#seokjin angst #seokjin x reader #seokjin fic #seokjin x you #jin x y/n #jin scenarios #jin x reader #jin x you #seokjin fanfic #jin fanfic #jin series #bts fanfic #bts fic #bts series #bts x reader #bts angst #bts exes au

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strawbearytae · 1 year

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maniac pt.2: 100%

ex boyfriend!jjk x reader

genre: angst ft. Fluff

word count: 6.1 k

warning: drunk! jk, y/n cries a lot, Conan Gray songs (I like him don’t come at me), mentions of sexual themes, language (as always), slightly annoying plot but I got in THE FEELS™️ okay????

synopsis: a mutual breakup from your long term boyfriend leaves you inevitably devastated, but a unexpected collaboration may just be the breakthrough the two of you needed.

read part 1

“Fuck you.”

“That’s your job, love, not mine.”

🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

To say that Jeon Jeongguk avoided you after the… ordeal… was the biggest understatement of understatements. The man disappeared. One moment you could see him on campus out of the corner of your eyes, then the next second: poof he dematerialized.

You thought about texting him, demanding him to… to… to what? Apologize? You weren’t sure if that was what you wanted. You were, afterall, going to kiss him if he hadn’t kissed you first…

Fuck… He was like a drug. You grazed your lips lightly with the tips of your own fingers… It was as if you had been clean for 9 months of him and that one single taste, that one single brush of his tantalizing lips against your own got you hooked once again. You craved him.

So, it was more than a surprise for you when you walked into your favorite library on campus to see Jeongguk behind the counter. Even more so since there was a girl in front of him who was obviously flirting with the man. And the world seemed to fade around you when you realized that Jeongguk had welcomed the flirting.

You shouldn’t feel upset, betrayed, queasy or anything even remotely close to what you were feeling. You had broken up; he was free to be with whoever he wanted. Free to meet, flirt and date whoever and whenever he wanted.

But the stabbing feeling in your gut couldn’t be ignored.

When you read romance in books, they always described this feeling as someone stabbing in your heart. But why was that? Your heart felt fine. It was beating stronger and faster if anything. However, your gut, your stomach felt hollow. A clawing feeling from the inside made you want to vomit. It was as if your body was telling you that something was wrong. That the pain of betrayal was physically excruciating.

Not that you were betrayed.

You were his ex, nothing less… nothing more.

You glanced over your shoulder once more as you exited the library, Jeongguk was watching you with a raised brow. The girl tugged on his sleeve for his attention once she realized it fled, he indulged her.

You slipped out of there silently.

///

The demo went successfully though you were half-afraid that Jeongguk would not show up. He did, he just didn’t acknowledge your presence. The professors from the music department congratulated you and were excited to see your performance in the next month. Jeongguk ate it all up while you stood there as if you were stoned, eyes glazing over as you watched Jeongguk interact with them with natural ease.

It was sickening.

Every time the conversation went to you, he went silent, Jeongguk looked around the demo room with an expression of faux curiosity. He masked his obvious distaste for the topic, you would’ve been fooled if you hadn’t been so tuned into his emotions before. Jeongguk was a master at masking his feelings… when he wanted to be.

“Y/N.”

You whipped your head up to see all the professors looking at you expectantly, even Jeongguk looked at you with a slight frown, “Sorry… What was the question?”

Professor Shin smiled, “Oh no worries, Y/N! We were just wondering if you had anything in mind after graduation. But that’s of no matter!” She looked at Jeongguk then back at you before smiling, “You both have been working so hard! No wonder you’re a little out of it.” She stepped back, calling the hoard of professors to retreat, “We’ll be looking forward to your performance, Y/N and Jeongguk.”

An inevitable breath escaped your lips when the professors were a safe distance away from the demo room. “You good?”

You almost yelped at Jeongguk’s voice; you had forgotten he was even there.

“Yes.” You turned away to gather your things, “Hey about-“

“Y’know the-“ He started at the same time.

You both stopped, staring at each other, “You go.”

“No, it’s okay. You go.”

“No, it’s okay…”

“Okay well…” His hand went to the back of his neck, “About the night at your apartment, when we kissed… that was-“

“A mistake,” You blurted, steeling yourself, “It was a mistake.”

Jeongguk’s expression was blank, “Right. Yes. That was what I was going to say. A mistake.” He drawled, dropping his han, “A mistake.” He enunciated, emphasizing each syllable, “Nothing more.”

You let out the breath you were holding in, “E-exactly.”

“We make so many mistakes, don’t we?” Jeongguk laughed grimly, “The kiss, this project and…”

This relationship.

He didn’t say it, but the words echoed in your brain. It was a mistake, wasn’t it? To love someone, to continue loving someone even when they didn’t love you back? That’s the greatest mistake we can make, a clash between our hearts and our minds. You shouldn’t feel this way, but you did. You chose to.

The silence was deafening.

“I…” You grabbed your things, quickly shoving them into your bag, “I’ll see you at rehearsal.”

Jeongguk studied you through the hoods of his eyes, his expression tense with a kind of aristocratic rigidity, “Fine.”

“Fine.”

You saw Jeongguk with the girl from the library around campus.

Her arms were always around him; she was always touching him (not that you were looking). Her fingers were always playing with his hair or the strings of his hoodie. Her legs were always over his as she sat on his lap. Her lips were usually grazing his collarbone or against the shell of his ear.

Those were the moments you wanted to wretch her hands off of him.

She didn’t know him.

She didn’t know that Jeongguk hated it when his hair was touched, he preferred light tugs on the strands at the base of his neck or the fact that he hated uneven strings in his hoodie (he would immediately fix them if they were asymmetrical after she tugged them, making you smirk silently…(not that you were looking)). She didn’t know that his stomach got cold easily and preferred legs around his waist when sitting on his lap. She didn’t know that he was ticklish on his collarbones and ears, that he preferred forehead kisses and nose scrunches rather than whispered secrets.

She didn’t know him.

But he still smiled when he looked at her. The does eyes scrunched upwards into an expression you had seen so often that you memorized it.

And it chilled you. They say heartbreak and anger are one, they are hot like fire lapping at your skin as tears formed in the corners of your eyes. But that wasn’t true, you were cold. Everything felt cold and empty, the memories of the warm body next to you had transformed into only mist of him. A cold ghost of memory that caressed your mind ever so often with hands you wished to escape from.

He was looking at you now, your eyes made the smallest sliver of contact that you held onto like a lifeline.

He didn’t let go. You wished he did, you didn’t want to be caught overanalyzing this moment hours later. But he didn’t let go. He held your gaze.

So, you broke it.

“Y/NnNnnNNnnNnNnNNnnNnnnnnNnnn.” Taehyung whined as he flopped on top of your bed, which usually wouldn’t be a problem except for the fact that you were still in it, “Let’s go! You can’t just spend your 22nd birthday in bed!”

You let out a muffled groan at the additional weight that was piled on you suddenly, “I don’t want to…”

“Come onnnnnnnnn.” Taehyung pulled you by the arm, dragging you slowly out of your covers, “You haven’t moved at all since you woke up.”

“A perfect way to spend a birthday.”

“Nonsense.” Taehyung succeeded pulling you out of your mattress, he kneeled over your body flopped on the floor, “Wake uppppppppppppppppppppp.”

“Nooooooo.”

“Y/NNnnnNnNnNNNnNnnN.” Your roommate continued to fuss.

“No.”

“I’ll do the dishes for a week.”

You head snapped up, “And the laundry?”

“Now we’re going too far. This is your birthday if you didn’t remember.”

You crawled back toward the bed, “Bye then.”

“Three days!”

“Five.”

Taehyung let out a sound that was between a yell and groan, “Four days! Final offer!”

You smiled; you were already planning to go the first time he asked anyway.

///

You shouldn’t have come.

The music in the frat house was loud and the lights blinding, your eyes went spotty with splashes of neon pink against the black of your eyelids every time you blinked. Taehyung tried to keep you engaged, pulling you to the living room that doubled as a dance floor, the bar, the dance floor, the bar over and over again even though he knew that you didn’t drink on your birthday.

You shouldn’t have come.

You didn’t even initially decide to come to the house anyway, you and Taehyung had dressed up for the cinema 10 minutes away, but the movie was cancelled, and the McDonald’s ice cream machine was broken. The house was plan c and the one you were least looking forward to.

Everything was too loud and too heavy, the air thick with the smell of underage drinking and sex. What a horrible way to spend your birthday.

You shook your head as you watched Taehyung being practically carried away by a group of football players, how an eccentric art student like him was able to be friends with all groups of kids baffled you sometimes.

Left alone to your own devices, you picked up some punch (which you were about 75% sure was spiked with vodka) before making your way upstairs to take a nap or do whatever to make the time go by faster. Taehyung was the one who drove you but seeing how much he’s been drinking; it seems like you wouldn’t be going home tonight at all.

Wandering the halls alone in a frat house was admittedly not your best idea but the desire to get away from the stench motivated you to open several rooms and be exposed to encounters and asscracks you could’ve gone your whole life without seeing.

After seeing a particularly risque encounter (you didn’t know people could bend like that in handcuffs), you had pratically lost all hope for the beloved nap. Sighing as you fought the urge to bang your head against the closet door, you leaned the back of your head against it as you stared at nothing...until a flashing pink dot started to jump against the black of the hallway.

It was Jeongguk.

It was a terrified Jeongguk.

It was a terrified Jeongguk in hot pink running towards you.

You froze as his eyes brightened in realization as he made his way towards you; in a flash of hot pink, he grabbed your wrist before pulling you along with him into the door you were contemplating banging your head against.

“Jeonggu-”

He pressed the rough pad of his fingertip against your lip, fingers that were covered in small calluses from all the times he would play his guitar as you baked in the back, “Shhhhh.”

This was the closest you’d ever been to him since the kiss-that-shall-not-be-named. The room was barely lit with fragments of light leaking from the doorframe’s gaps which highlighted his focused face in sharp shades. You thought about the moonlight: how it had danced around him in the earliest of nights months ago with his eyes twinkling in delight from your midnight escapades. They turned those brown eyes into pure honey.

With his chest against yours and his head leaned over your own to press his ear against the shut door you were unable to hear beyond the steady beat of his heart that your ear was pressed against; his soft breaths caressed your forehead as he leant past you to survey the sounds outside the door. The only thing that broke the silence were the occasional mumbles and shrieks of drunken girls and the hitching of your own breath.

The periodic silence allowed you to observe the room you had been pulled into, though you found it to be less of a room than you’d originally given it credit for. The floor and lower shelves were crammed with an assortment of shoeboxes and hidden vodka, the upper half was littered with winter coats and even more vodka. Jeongguk, in his panic from running away from whatever he was, had pulled the two of you into a closet.

Jeon fucking Jeongguk was wearing a hot pink set pulled you, his ex, into a closet in a frat house on your birthday.

Could this situation get any fucking weirder?

The silence hung thick in the air until you finally felt him relax against you, ”What the fuck was that?”

“Shh!” He pressed his finger against your lips before you snatched them away.

“Answers. Now.”

Jeongguk frowned and looked around his surroundings for the first time since he had pulled you both in.

“Jeongguk.” You gritted your teeth, praying to whichever deity that he couldn’t feel how uncomfortably hot you were getting, “Explain.”

“I’m hiding.”

“I’m hoping so because there is no other reason that you and I should be in a closet together, especially when you have a girlfriend.” You snapped.

Jeongguk frown slightly twitched before dissolving into a masked smirk, “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“What-”

“We broke up two months ago. I’m hiding.”

Two months ago was your accident, not that it mattered. You filed that information in the back of your mind.

Your brows wrinkled at the recollection of the younger girl that had practically thrown herself against Jeongguk. She certainly did seem persistent but not someone Jeongguk couldn’t handle, “From her?”

“It seems that my charms are too addictive to some women.” His eyes flickered over to your own before he stepped back, allowing you to have your own inch of your personal bubble (thank you very much).

You pretended not to notice, “Why hot pink?”

“Why not?”

“You don’t wear hot pink.”

“And how would you know that?” He nearly sneered, “People change.”

“People change, they don’t transform.”

Jeongguk stayed silent for a moment as if he conceded, “It was a deal.” He grumbled, “Wear hot pink and she’d agreed to leave me alone.”

“Did it work?”

“Obviously not.”

You snorted and covered your mouth to stop the laughter that was escaping from your lips, “I’m sorry.” You wheezed, “But I can’t believe you fell for that trend.”

He raised a brow.

“True love in hot pink.” You wheezed between laughs.

Jeongguk’s face went blank before they went comically wide with realization, making you laugh even harder.

“Shut up! You’re going to get us caught!”

“’m sorry!” You wheezed, “Can’t elp it.”

At the noise of drunken singing (very off-key by the way), Jeongguk covered your mouth with his own palm and pushed his ear against the door, the sudden movement shocked you into silence. Jeongguk didn’t even seem to notice your laughter ceasing and only focused on the footsteps that barreled around your area, muffled female voices that were clearly looking for Jeongguk passed frequently around the closet.

Even though you didn’t do anything wrong, you trembled at the thought of being caught.

After a few heart-racing silences, Jeongguk whispered, “I think they’re gone.”

You nodded in response, tugging at the sleeve of his hot pink jumper to let you go.

“Oh sorry.” He shifted his hand away from your mouth but didn’t quite leave your face, his tattooed fingers still caressing your cheek and the calluses on his palms scratching your jawline lightly.

And you looked up to see galaxies.

“You-”

“Maniac.” He whispered, “You’re insane.”

Your breath hitched in your throat, “Am I?”

“Psychopath.”

“Don’t be dramatic.”

Jeongguk grinned at the reference, “We had magic.”

“But you made it tragic.”

His smile disappeared, “did I?”

“I-”

“Why did we break up, Y/N?”

You didn’t say because you couldn’t... because you didn’t know why. You had reasons then, reasons that you had used to build a resume of persuasion to break it off with him. You swore you did; it was the fighting (didn’t you always make up though), the constant need for attention (but didn’t he give you space), the fear of abandonment (did he ever leave you?)

Yes.

Yes, he did.

“Because you wanted to.” You said bitterly, that was it. You only wanted it to end... because he did. You didn’t want to grab him, force him to stay, you let him go because he wanted to.

“I didn’t want to.” He whispered, “I won’t say there weren’t days where I wondered what it was like to be single again, but I never saw my life like... this.”

“This?”

“Ignoring each other like there was nothing.” He pulled on a curl that escaped your hair before he looked into your eyes with a type of desperation. As if he wanted you to please just understand, “Like it was a mistake. It was never a mistake.”

“Okay well…” His hand went to the back of his neck, “About the night at your apartment, when we kissed… that was-“

“A mistake,” You blurted, steeling yourself, “It was a mistake.”

Jeongguk’s expression was blank, “Right. Yes. That was what I was going to say. A mistake.”

“If anything,” His voice cracked, “It was the best decision I made.”

You don’t remember what possessed you to grab him, but that single confession sparked something inside you that drove you over the edge. You grasped his shirt before pulling him towards you, his lips seconds apart from brushing against your lips. His eyes widened at your sudden boldness before they shifted into something like hunger.

The hand that caressed your face tightened slightly against your jaw; his eyes flickered down to your lips before he slowly kissed you. It was almost as if he was breathing you in.

He kissed you with a kind of softness that you had missed, the kind that made you feel like there was no one else, nothing else and there will be nothing else in the future. He pressed against you with a timid sort of fervor that was new. Your kisses with him were usually sure and comfortable, but there was a side emerging that you’d never experienced before.

He tasted old and yet new. He tasted different than from months ago, a lover that knew how to mold your body in pliancy without making it routinely, making your blood ignite when he sucked on your bottom lip before trailing his lips away from your mouth to your neck. Every press of his lips left purple marks that screamed his presence, a reminder that made sure you couldn’t deny all of this and chalk it up to a delusion that this was all a dream in the morning.

You gasped when he bit down slightly on the base of your neck, you could feel his lips curve into a grin when he kissed the mark, “So you’d remember.”

You kissed him again. And again. And again.

///

“I’ve missed this.” Jeongguk muttered into your hair, he smelled of cheap alcohol and himself.

You snuggled closer to him on the couch, “Me too.”

The two of you left the frat party in a drunken haze, for you, it wasn’t from the drinking but from the kiss. You giggled as he stumbled into your apartment in clumsy blur. He pouted before he pulled you into him in response. You two ended up as a heap of laughter and sweat on the floor before he had hulled you on the couch where you were right now.

You didn’t care what you were to Jeongguk, not right now. Right now, you were in his arms with his scent filling your nose. You wanted to focus on that, focus on this moment before it evaporated in the morning.

You wished that this night would never end, that this bliss would go on forever. That your kisses would leave stains that lasted longer than the marks on your neck. You wanted this to last. You knew it wouldn’t, but your mind begged for it.

“Goodnight.” He whispered an end.

“Goodnight.”

///

The first thing you saw in your clearer state of mind was Taehyung screaming before tackling a tired-looking Jeongguk onto the floor.

No, that was actually the second thing. The first thing you noticed was the fact that Jeongguk was indeed shirtless and walking around in your apartment with pajama bottoms that he had left months ago. How he still remembered where the pajama bottoms were and the fact that they existed in your possessions was a question you filed away to ask later.

Right now, your roommate had to be calmed down before either one of them busted a blood vessel (or an eye, depending on how violent Taehyung was feeling today).

“Taehyung! What is wrong with you!?” You hauled your roommate away from Jeongguk who had a stupendous grin on his face. Fuck, you missed that- NOT THE TIME Y/N!

“What’s wrong with me?” Taehyung nearly scoffed, “I saved you from this foul, evil, little-” Taehyung pointed accusingly at Jeongguk, “RODENT from defaming you!”

You sent a pointed look at Jeongguk, “What did you say?”

Jeongguk batted his lashes before he shrugged, “I just said that I spent the night here.”

The response from Taehyung was almost automatic, “SEE!” He nearly stomped on the floor, “This... thing was walking around half-naked, looking freshly fucked while you were laying unconscious in a burrito state on our couch! What else was I supposed to assume except that he kidnapped you to our apartment before he decided to tuck you into the couch, so he had access to all the creepy ex-boyfriend material he want- Wait what is that on your neck?”

Your hand automatically slapped over the bite mark, “I- Um.”

“Did he hit you?” Taehyung nearly growled looking ready to fight Jeongguk once again.

“No! Taehyung calm down-”

“Wait why does it have little incisions-” His mouth snapped shut before his complexion visibly paled, “I-is that a hickey?”

“Taehyung,” You stepped toward him with raised hands, “I can explain-”

“Oh my god you did fuck him.” Taehyung turned automatically to Jeongguk, his voice deadly calm, “Use protection, I don’t want to be a godfather at 22.”

Jeongguk rolled his eyes, “You are not going to be the godfather of my kids.”

“Good, I’m going to be the godfather of Y/N’s kids so I’m glad my godchildren won’t be fuckboy spawns with piercings and guitar hands.” Taehyung rolled his eyes, “But if you hurt her again, I will not be against castrating you.” He threatened,

“Taehyung, we’re not fucking.” You pressed your fingers to your temple; it was much too early for this.

“Sure, and I 100% did not see you having a vampire kink considering the size of the bite on your neck.” Taehyung checked his watch, “I have class. Gotta go. Use condoms.”

And then he left.

Jeongguk looked up to you from the floor, he raised a brow suggestively, “So a vampire kink, huh?”

You kicked him in the balls.

///

“Jeongguk-” You tried through his kiss, “We have work- mph-”

“Later.”

///

Your day was horrid, not only did you wake up 10 minutes late, cursing the fact you were a woman. You had to run to your calculus lecture across campus with horrible cramps that made you want to cry with every step, your usual café ran out of your favorite drink, and Taehyung ate the last slice of cake.

It was international “fuck y/n” day apparently.

So, by the time you met Jeongguk at his dorm for practice (as you were doing so for the past 2 weeks), you were exhausted and snappy.

“Okay, what’s wrong with you today?” Jeongguk asked, pulling off his glasses after the 17th sarcastic comment and 5th snipped response you gave.

“Nothing.” You mumbled, “Just having a bad day.”

Jeongguk sighed before leaning back in his chair, his expression went blank for a few seconds before he leaned toward the table again, “There’s cupcakes in the fridge.”

You had to school your excitement, “What?”

“I thought it would be nice to surprise you later with cupcakes, but it seems like now’s the best time. Get up, we’re taking these to your apartment.”

“But what about-”

“Frankly, Y/N, we’ve gotten only 2 lines done in the last 40 minutes, we’re not very productive today.” He grabbed your scarf and wrapped it around you, “We’re going to go to your apartment and watch the rest of Business Proposal because Ahn Hyo Seop is fucking hot while pigging out on overpriced cupcakes, okay?”

“Okay.”

And that’s exactly what you two did.

///

“You probably need to reword this part again.”

“Mmm.”

“And this should probably be C natural and not C flat, it sounds a bit odd.”

“Mhmmm.”

“And this- Jeongguk please for the love of god stop kissing my neck!” You let out an exasperated sigh before pushing him off of you.

Jeongguk pouted, “I thought you liked me kissing you.”

“I don’t! I mean I do! Just not when I’m working- we're working.” Flashes of the last 10 minutes of making out with him on the couch with your notes astray on the floor spawned in your mind, “I mean sometimes it’s okay. But not when I’m focusing, but like I’m-” Jeongguk smirked, “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

“No, do continue,” Jeongguk propped his head onto one of his knuckles, “I love hearing your rambles on how much you like kissing me.”

“Fuck you.”

“That’s your job, love, not mine.”

You elbowed him in the stomach for that one.

///

“I hate this part.”

“Too bad.”

“You know when you had a bad day, I fed you cupcakes.” Jeongguk glared, “But when I have a bad day, you steal my house and my money?”

“You’re the one who wanted to play this stupid game,” You threw a spare dollar at him. “Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. You only did this to yourself.”

“Don’t gaslight me!” He whined, “AND GIVE ME BACK THE BOARDWALK!”

“NO!”

You lunged for your cards as he reached for them, he tried to wrestle them out of your grasp causing the two of you to roll around on the monopoly board. Your empire, fed by Jeongguk’s bankruptcy, fell apart.

“Yes!” He screeched when he finally pulled the battered card out of your grasp, “I win!” He pressed a kiss against your lips.

“That’s not how the game works.” You glared once he pulled away.

“Well, I get to do this, so I think I’m the winner.” He said before his lips met yours once again, little did he realize that you believed you were the true winner for that.

///

“Hey, so remember Jungshin?” Jeongguk murmured from behind you. The two of you had put on a movie after a rather heated game of UNO (which turned into a rather heated makeout session but that was of no matter). It was a movie you had already watched before, a rather boring one at that (something about a kid and his dead hamster... or was it a hamster and its dead human?) but with Jeongguk’s arm around your waist and his nose buried in your hair, even the most boring movie seemed bearable.

“Yeah...” You muttered absent-mindedly as the kid (not the hamster) started to wail on screen.

“He’s getting married.”

“Isn’t he like 24?”

“Yeah.” You could feel Jeongguk shaking his head, “Insane to be married that young. But I need a plus one. Wanna come?”

“When is it?”

“January.”

“Yeah, that’s fine.” You liked Jungshin, that shouldn’t be too much of a problem. It was then that it hit you, “Jeongguk.”

“Hm?” He murmured as he pressed a kiss on the shell of your ear,

“What are we?”

Jeongguk froze from behind you.

Well, that was an answer.

You sat up, throwing Jeongguk’s arm away from your body, “Jeongguk...” You tried calmly, “what are we doing?”

His expression went blank, “What do you mean?”

“We- you- I-” You let out a frustrated sigh before standing up to face him, “We cuddle, we kiss-”

“We do more than just kiss.”

You rolled your eyes, “We make out, we go on little dates, and you always come over.” You listed them off your fingers, “And now, you want me to go to a wedding with you. Jeongguk, what are we doing? What are we?”

He reached for you, “Y/N-”

You stepped back, “Because I would consider this dating.”

Perhaps you were looking into this too much. Yes, perhaps you were, but could anyone blame you? In the 2 months that you and Jeongguk have been... doing this, there wasn’t a single label. You didn’t call each other anything, you just were... You desperately wanted it. You wanted to be wanted by him.

But the two of you never talked about the breakup. You glazed over it like it never happened and you could see way: it was messy. It was crazy. Unpleasant.

His face dropped and with that, your heart shattered. “I guess you don’t think the same way.”

“Y/N, no I-”

“Jeongguk,” You looked away, “I don’t think I can look at you right now, I need time. You need time.”

“Y/N-”

“Jeongguk.” You swallowed the knot in your throat, “I like you, sometimes I think a little too much. And that honestly scares me because we’ve done this before.” You looked straight at him, watching the light in his eyes shatter as you continued, “And it didn’t end well. But I know that if you don’t walk out of those doors right now, I will give you my heart over and over and over again. I will let you bruise it, shatter it and completely demolish it, but I’d still hand it to you again with a kiss.” Your lips trembled, “And I don’t want to start something without having a sure answer from you that you’d be committed. I’m not even asking for 100% just 90, maybe not even that. But I don’t want to start this and beg you to stay, I can’t handle that from you. Not again.”

His mouth clamped shut and you couldn’t blame him; it was a low blow, really, to bring up the breakup. But it was true, you wouldn’t be able to handle that type of heartbreak from Jeongguk for a second time, not when you were still recovering from the first.

“Please get out. I can’t do this right now.” You bowed your head, forcing the tears from releasing.

They unleashed like a storm at the shut of the door.

----

You didn’t talk for days.

Again.

---

Jeongguk <3: Hey

You: Hi

Jeongguk: I’m sorry

You: I know.

Jeongguk: I need time.

You: I know.

You saw Jeongguk around campus, he waved to you. You waved back.

Sometimes, you thought that was worse than when the two of you had ignored each other. He wasn’t a stranger, not anymore. But he wasn’t a friend either. He was another generic face in the crowd that you were friendly with rather than another stranger.

Faux friendliness, fake smiles and avoiding glances across the room.

Why was it so hard? It had only been two weeks, but the hole he left in your life was too noticeable. A Jeongguk-sized hole that he could only fill.

And in a twisted way... you wished he felt that same emptiness in his heart with you.

Ex: Are we going to continue the recording?

You: Festival is around 3 months away

Ex: Okay

You: Okay

Ex: You looked wretty today

Ex: I mean fuck tou always do

Ex: I’m wsirry

Ex: I still lpve you

// Ex: sorry about yesterday

Ex: I was drunk

You: It’s okay

You: I was drunk too

“Are you sure you’ll be okay alone?” Taehyung asked as he shrugged on his coat.

It had been 2 weeks since Jeongguk’s last text, 3 since you had asked him to take time.

Maybe you had been too harsh on him.

“I’ll be fine.” You waved Taehyung away as you started another episode of Squid Game, “I don’t even like drinking, go have fun with Jimin.”

“Okay.” Taehyung hesitated before opening the door, “You looked happy y’know?”

“Hm?”

“As much as I hate to give that douchebag any credit,” Taehyung curled his bottom lip, “You looked happy when you were with him. I know it’s not my place, but Y/N... You glowed.”

It was around 11 pm when Taehyung started pounding on your door, you rolled your eyes as you contemplated whether to leave your roommate in his drunken haze outside your apartment. Well it was his fault for not taking his keys...

Deciding to be a dutiful roommate, you unlocked the door, “Taehyung, I swear if you throw up on my good shoes again-”

“I don’t think I want to throw up on your shoes.” Jeongguk replied, “Or you actually.”

Jeongguk.

With a shovel and a rose.

You stared. It had been weeks since the two of you had a conversation and here he was at your door, holding a shovel and a rose to match the song that you two had been working on.

“Is this a joke?” You asked much too snappily than you would’ve liked.

You had imagined this moment, the moment when Jeongguk gave you an answer, but never like this. Never when you were sitting in a ratty old hoodie and ill-fitting pajama bottoms, never with him leaning the shovel outside your door while grasping the rose so delicately. Never with him looking into your eyes full of the determination of a soldier.

“No,” He replied calmly.

“Then what is this?”

“A confession. If you’d let me.”

Your knees went weak but you still narrowed your eyes at him. Jeongguk wasn’t a man of many words and right now, despite your longing to bury yourself into his chest, you wanted to hear the right words from him.

You leaned against the doorframe and crossed your arms, “Go on then.”

“I don’t know.” Jeongguk started, “I thought about for weeks, Y/N. But I don’t know what to call us.”

Your heart sunk a little.

“But I know what I want to call you.” He whispered, “I want to call you my girlfriend but that word isn’t enough to describe how I feel, Y/N. You- I...” He took a deep breath, “Fuck, I had I script but I can’t even remember it now.” He laughed to himself grimly.

You curled your lip to keep yourself from laughing endearingly. You had to have an answer from him, you needed his word.

“It’s you.” He muttered, “I cannot describe it beyond that, it’s you and it will always be you. Those nights that I wondered if this was enough, if this was love showed me nothing but the fact that it is you.” He finally looked at you, “I don’t believe in true love, but with you, I want to give it a shot because when I see you, Y/N fuck, I want you in any capacity you’d have me. I’m late. I know. You can kick me to the curb, I’d hand you the shovel to bury me and the rose to put on my grave eagerly if you think that’s what I deserve. I’ll take whatever you give me. I’ll hand you my heart, I’ll let you trample on it, bruise it and shatter it and I will still hand it to you even if you stop handing me yours.”

“Because Y/N...” He nearly whispered, “I’m not sure 100%, I will never be sure 100% but I’ll give you my 99, my 99.9999 because... I think I love you.”

You wanted to capture this moment, the way he looked at you right now... you wanted it to last forever. And perhaps, it would.

“I’ll take it.” You whispered, stepping towards him, “Your 90, your 99, your 99.999 and that 1 percent that .0001 percent that you’re in doubt, I’ll fill that 1 percent up. Because Jeongguk...” Your hands grazed the back of his neck as he continued to stare, “I think I love you too.”

And you kissed him.

“Only 1 percent?” He smiled cheekily against your lips.

“No, you idiot, 100%… together.”

Being with him was a gamble, one that you could lose but you’d take it anyway. There was no 100% guarantee of success, but perhaps, you could make it the closest to it together.

end pt 2/2

a/n: I have nothing to say for myself. It’s been some time-

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mercurygguk · 1 year

Text

TEASER; if it’s not you | kth (m)

↳ summary; Kim Taehyung grew up watching his parents fall more in love for each day that passed and he always longed for that great, passionate love himself. But if it’s not you? Then he doesn’t want it.

POSTED !! read here

pairing; taehyung x f. reader

word count; tba.

rating; 18+

content; exes to lovers!au, smut/angst

warnings; will be stated in final post.

release date; nov 18th 2022, 10 PM CEST

chapters. part one | part two

↳ listen to the playlist here.

author’s note; took a break from jk fics and wrote a tae fic !! please let me know what you think of this lil sneak peek and make sure to reblog if you enjoy it as much as i hope you will 🫶🏼 happy reading! (ps. pls ignore all my typos if you see any)

will be posted next Friday! stay tuned and lmk if you wanna be tagged <3

Kim Taehyung is not sad.

Sadness is not what he feels when he goes out with his friends and spots two people all over each other, happy and in love. Sadness is not what he feels when he sits at home, watching a movie by himself. Sadness is not what he feels when his friends tell him they’re engaged and are having an engagement party to celebrate.

No, Kim Taehyung is way past sadness.

If anything, what he feels is most likely something more akin to a feeling called ‘I don’t care anymore’... a certain, unexplainable emptiness. He doesn’t care that everyone around him is falling in love and getting engaged, he doesn’t care if two strangers are all over each other when’s at a bar. He doesn’t care that all of his one-night-stands give him a nasty look when he tells them to leave in the middle of the night after having emotionless – I don’t care who you are or what your name is – sex with them.

Taehyung just doesn't care anymore. Or that’s what he thought, at least.

He thought that he wouldn’t give two shits when he saw you walk through the door, arriving at the engagement party his friends are currently throwing. He also thought that he wouldn’t care that some unknown guy was trailing right behind you, his hand tightly wrapped around yours.

But Taehyung should’ve known better.

He should’ve known his mind would play tricks on him and pull up flashbacks to the day he lost all belief in love.

Two years ago…

“Kiss me,” he pleaded, voice barely above a whisper as he spoke. He begged you, the unsteady tone of his voice giving away that he was on the brink of breaking down if you didn’t connect your lips with his within the next few seconds. He was desperate, breathing heavily as he tried his best to keep the tears from welling in his eyes.

The last few weeks had been absolute hell. The apartment has been empty beyond measure, most of your stuff gone by now. You haven’t been in the apartment since the day you left and the only reason you were back tonight was because you forgot a few things and wanted them in your own, new apartment. Taehyung knew you’d come, you had texted him to let him know just so that you wouldn’t be barging in on him at a random hour. One thing he just didn’t realize when you texted him was how much he genuinely hated all of this before you stood in front of him with a small, sad-looking smile on your face.

How you ended up in the bedroom, cuddling and now almost kissing, was unbeknownst to him and you as well. Taehyung had been sitting on the edge of the bed, watching as you packed your remaining things in utter silence. When you were finished and wanted to give him one last goodbye hug, he had made the first move to urge you onto the bed with him. It’s not that he had bad intentions with it. He just needed to hold you one last time before you’d move on for good. Cuddles then turned into him pulling you on top of him to straddle his waist, begging and pleading for you to kiss him.

“Taehyung…” You softly let his name fall from your lips in a sigh as you looked down at him from your straddling position on top of him, “we shouldn’t-”

“Please, ____,” he tried again with pain laced in his words, sitting up with you still perched on his lap, “please, just kiss me.”

[end of flashback]

Two years since he last saw you and talked to you. Two years of losing every ounce of belief he had in ‘the great love’ of life. Why continue to look for love when he already had the love of his life and lost her?

In Taehyung’s head, there was no reason to look for love when the person he loved more than life itself left him with only half a heart to live by two years ago. Even if he wanted to find another great love, it simply wouldn’t be possible. He lives with only half of his heart and you can’t love a person with just half a heart.

Not when someone else has the other half.

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eleni-cherie · 1 year

Text

among thieves ✨ || bts • pjm

- epilogue

"what even am I to you? your rival, your lover, an obstacle or am I supposed to be your coffin?"

about two thieves who can't live with nor without each other. and a joint past that comes back to threaten them.

»»»

masterlist: here

— genre: thief au, gangster comedy, adventure, romcom, humour, angst, fluff, very flirty jimin, friends/rivals/exes to lovers (it's complicated, ok?!) f2l e2l ex2l all members play a role in this story!

ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE. CHARACTERS NOT NECESSARILY LIKE THE REAL PERSONS. ALSO VERY UNREALISTIC PLOT LOL - JUST PRETEND READING A MANGA/COMIC OR WATCHING A FILM, REALLY.

SUGGESTIVE THEMES. MENTIONS OF VIOLENCE & BLOOD (BUT NOTHING TOO GRAPHIC, IT'S STILL A COMEDY!)

»»»

several years later

Tainan, Taiwan

Jimin took a sip from his ice coffee and flipped a page in the book he was reading.

The evening sun was bathing the building in a warm shade, a comfortably mild summer atmosphere being created. Some children ran through the streets to get to the nearest park with lots of laughter and screams. Almost bumping into two women who were chatting while carrying their groceries.

He turned another page when sensing someone taking a seat on the free chair on the other side of his table. He didn't need to look up to know who it was though. The café being not overly crowded, and he had already seen him enter from the corner of his eye.

"You finally found me."

"Who said I ever lost track of you?"

Jimin perked up with a lopsided smirk, arching a brow at him. "What took you so long then?"

Seokjin laughed out, shaking his head. "Choosing a country that isn't an interpol member to settle down.. you knew what you were doing."

Closing the book on his lap, he took another sip from his coffee.

"Oh, is that so? I just came here for the nice weather," he said innocently, a small chuckle leaving his lips as he looked at his former antagonist. It felt strange somehow, having him simply sit there casually next to him without him trying to arrest him. Who would've thought a day like this would ever come. "And how comes you pay me a visit now?"

The older man shrugged, leaning back in his seat. "Been awhile since the last time I saw you, so I thought why not spending my vacation here?'"

Jimin nodded understanding and smiled at him. "And how've you been?"

He shrugged. "Oh, you know.. after you guys became inactive, it became quite boring."

"Aw."

"No, that wasn't a compliment."

"It sounded like one though."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Seokjin sighed, "But you know, it became boring and you know, I ain't getting younger either. So after I got married, I decided to take it easier and stepped down from the leader position. I focus more on paperwork now."

Jimin's eyes widened in shock as he straightened himself. Unable to imagine some random office sitter in the leader position. "And who's the leader in the theft divison now?"

"Blake."

"Oh!" he exclaimed and relaxed into his previous position, "I can see that. She always seemed eager to prove herself to you."

"And she did."

"Kinda sad for Jungkookie though, isn't it?"

"Nah," Seokjin waved at him, shaking his head, "He never was interested in that position. He still works there with her though."

Jimin couldn't keep himself from laughing at the thought of Skylar and Jungkook together and her giving him orders while he obeyed like a good subordinate. "You know, I always felt like the two were into each other and ever since I tried setting them up.."

A teasing grin spread on Seokjin's features. "Since when are you so invested in other people's love life?"

He only shrugged and dragged a dramatic sigh. "Can't help it, I'm such a romantic."

Seokjin laughed under his breath. "To be honest, I sometimes felt the same," he admitted then, "And I still think it whenever I catch them looking at each other. Perhaps it was their professionalism that kept them from going further."

"Or perhaps they're just dating in secret."

He perked up at this, seeing Jimin wiggling his brows at him. "You think so?"

"I might or might not have my sources."

The older man laughed out, nodding. "Well, good for them then."

"But wait!" Jimin exclaimed then, suddenly having processed something else. "You said you got married? To Yongsun?"

Seokjin's eyes widened, realising he had indeed mentioned it. He bit back a smile, confirming it again with a quick nod. "Yeah.."

"And I wasn't invited to the wedding?" Jimin faked offence to which Seokjin grinned.

"Figured you wouldn't have wanted to get arrested."

"True. But since you only met her thanks to me, I still think I deserved it."

"It surely wasn't thanks to you.."

"Now, don't be so unfair," Jimin pouted, "You wouldn't have been at that ship if I hadn't planned to steal the 'black star'." He was referring to the party a CEO of one of the biggest korean companies had thrown for his wife's birthday two years ago. And that wife had happened to own a very valuable black pearl, which she was wearing on a spray brooch and which the gang had been after. "So technically, I deserved an invitation."

Seokjin groaned in annoyance, getting tired of their quarrel. "You know what? I take it back. It's been great since you retired. I finally got some peace."

"Rude considering I practically introduced you to her."

"You didn't 'introduce' her to me!" Seokjin objected with a laugh, "You pushed her on me when I was running after you!"

"Still counts - you're married now, aren't you?" Jimin pointed out with a sly grin.

He wasn't able to disagree with that. So he gave up with an exhausted sigh.

"So?" Seokjin coughen then in hopes of changing topics and looked around. "And where's the rest?"

"Thought you had kept track on all of us."

"I did," he corrected, "But since interpol doesn't have any resources here, it wasn't too easy and there're some gaps."

Jimin hummed, stirring his coffee with the straw.. "Well, Taehyungie and his wife live nearby."

"You mean Cassandra?"

"Oh, you even got her name! Impressive!"

"Aish, stop with the sarcasm! Of course I know all your associates! I hunted you guys for years after all." Seokjin rolled his eyes before adding with a smirk, "And I was pretty good at it."

Jimin couldn't stop laughing, finding it always amusing how his opponent reacted when getting upset. "Never doubted your skills."

"So the two live nearby."

He nodded. "Yeah, she works at a hospital here."

"And Yoongi?"

"Right now, he's at one of the temples in the mountains. Meditating, training or whatever," Jimin snorted, drinking the last bit of coffee. He always found it quite lame whenever Yoongi got in one of his 'monk moods' - as Jimin called them - every few years and just disappeared for awhile to disconnect from everything. But perhaps he was just a little envious of that skill, since he himself could never do it. "But knowing him, he'll be back in the city in a few weeks."

Seokjin hummed. The corners of his lips shaping a cocky smile. "Needless to ask where Arabella ended up, right?"

"Right," a grin tucking on Jimin's full lips. His glance falling down to his watch then. "I'm actually waiting here for her. She should come any minute now."

"To be honest," Seokjin began then with a light frown on his soft features, "I always knew you guys would retire some day. I just assumed it'd be along with me."

"Well, you know we aren't in our early twenties anymore and besides.. some priorities shifted with time."

Seokjin hummed. Understanding it in a way. After all, same applied to him by now. Still he couldn't help wondering what priorities had changed for Jimin and why.

A black Harley Davidson came to an abrupt halt in front of them then. Arabella taking her helmet off, her hair swaying as it fell over her shoulders.

"Bella-baby, you're late!"

"I said around six, not exactly. Not my fault you came here too early," she huffed. Her eyes widening when spotting the man next to him. "Pops, you here?"

She was actually quite happy to see Seokjin again, having kind of missed him - as weird as it sounded. She had been so used of having him always on their back, it was weird it wasn't the case anymore.

Seokjin, however, didn't seem as pleased. The old nickname cuasing him to roll his eyes. "Seriously, when will you guys ever quit calling me 'pops'?"

"Probably never, it's your nickname for a reason after all."

He laughed under his breath. "You never told me the reason though."

Arabella and Jimin exchanged a look, giggling. "Isn't it obvious? You were always running after us and scolding us. Like a dad."

"And you're older than us, so it fit."

He was speechless for a moment. In a way that stupid nickname that he had secretly grown fond of, made sense. It was even somehow cute, in a very weird and twisted way. He coughed then, feeling his ears becoming red. "I've got to go now," he announced and stood up, "Can't let Yong wait alone for too long. See you guys." He waved at them as he walked away. Only to shortly turn around then with a smirk. "Oh, but before I forget.. You don't coincidentally know anything about that stolen jade statue that is all over the local newpapers?"

Arabella and Jimin looked at each other, before giving him an innocent shrug. Shaking their heads. "No, why would we? We're retired now, remember?"

"Right. Right," Seokjin let out a loud laugh. Not being convinced at all. "Well, see you then."

As he disappeared around the corner, a frowned settled on Arabella's features. "He didn't buy it, did he?"

"So what?" Jimin shrugged and picked up his book, shoving it inside his jacket. "He can't do anything about it as long as we don't leave the country."

They might've officially retired a few months ago, but that didn't mean they'd be dead. After all they'd never be the kind to be content with a 'normal' life. Even if there was no one to hunt them anymore, neither from interpol nor from any organization - Namjoon and Hoseok having liquidated 'owl inc' and its branches only a year ago - they still wanted to keep the excitement, thrill and fun. Just in smaller portions here and there.

"Anyway, let's go."

Arabella tossed him the second helmet before putting her own on and he got on the bike behind her. His arms wrapping around her waist, purposely way too high to be closer to her boobs and she rolled her eyes. Already used to his attics.

She switched the ignition button on, her foot kicking up the kickstand. "By the way," he spoke up then, propping his chin on her shoulder with an arched brow as he curiously looked up to her. "Don't you think it'd be better not to drive the bike for now? You know, because of the.." His eyes pointed down at her belly before returning to her.

She kind of wanted to be annoyed at him for even suggesting this, but then again she understood his worries. She pecked his cheek. "When the bump starts showing, I will," she smiled and squeezed the clutch lever all the way to the grip. His arms tightening around her.

And they drove off.

THE END

»»»

-thank you all for reading this story! it was fun writing something totally new for once, so hope you also had fun reading it!

❗ the sequel a thief's end ✨ || bts • myg is out as well!

❗the prequel "a thief's origin ✨ || bts • kth" along with one shots for jungkook and seokjin are in the works!

- check out my other bts stories, too: here

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girl8890 · 2 years

Text

Jin | Unwanted Reunion (I)

Summary: Once pining lovers from the past, unmated but soulmates nonetheless. Fate brings you two together after all this time, and catching up on all that you’ve missed stirs feelings you want to shove away from your being. For Seokjin, on the other hand, those feelings have never been able to leave.

Pairing: Demon King!Seokjin x Human!Reader

Genre: demon!au, soulmates!au, royalty!au, exs-to-lovers, smut, fluff, angst

Rating: 18+

Warnings: unwanted kiss, reunion of past lovers & friends, pining, groveling, past sexual encounters, soul binding, near death experience, attempt & success at murder, blood, death of a minor character, jealousy, possessiveness, sexual dreams, implied masturbation (m & f), heavy petting, nipple play, body worship, vaginal fingering, dry humping, hand job through clothes

Teaser

。・°°・°°・。。・°°・°°・。。・°°・°°・。

When Jimin first told you he got a new tattoo, you thought nothing of it. Not even when he fidgeted like a nervous kitten about it. It wasn’t until you saw said tattoo, that you knew it wasn’t put there by ink and needle. You’ve seen enough mate bonds when you were with your ex… boyfriend? Friend? Whatever… to know that this specific marking was not made by a tattooist. You knew, because you also once thought you would have the same mark with a different letter inside eventually.

No… this marking was put there by a demon.

Not just any demon, to Jimin at least, but one he mated with. Had sex with. And apparently had mutual love with.

That was the only way to gain the marking. By having sex with a demon that loved you and you loved them. With all of this knowledge of yours swirling in your brain, you still can’t get over the fact that Jimin—your best friend of over ten years—fell in love with a demon right under your nose. You were doing so good at not getting involved with any demon business since you and… him… split up. Even while you were directly involved with said business you were able to keep your family and friends unaware of the fact that demons existed.

“How?” Is all you ask Jimin once your shock of seeing the mark has wore off. But even as you state your single worded question, your eyes can’t remove themselves from the almost skin colored blossom filled circle with the letter T inside.

Jimin nibbles on his bottom lip. Trying and failing to keep the secret you once also had to keep. “I don’t know what you mean. How I got it done? I just walked into-“

“No, Jimin. I mean how did you fall in love with a demon!”

Jimin is shell shocked when you reveal your knowledge of the deathless beings. Him clearly not knowing that you knew. “Y-you—you know!”

You roll your eyes. Hating that he ignored your question, but answering his anyway. “Yes, Jimin, I know. Almost had one of those marking myself once upon a time.”

You gesture to the marking on Jimin’s neck, and he subconsciously touches itwhile looking at your neck. Like a marking similar to his would suddenly appear on it.

“But who would— Seokjin.”

You shut your eyes at the sound of his name. The person that once filled your heart with so much joy, now just a name that fills you with nothing but agony. Jimin knows about your past… lover? He was the one you went to crying about him all those years ago, and he was also the one to help you put all the broken pieces of your heart back together. He never met him, though. You wanting to keep the few people you cared about in this lifetime out of the dangerous world of demons.

Looking back, you don’t think it was fair of you to just skip out on the person that claimed an undying love for you, but it has also been almost two years since you saw him. Leaving his kingdom with blood all over you, and nothing but nightmares in your wake. You loved him at the time, sure, but once you finally got a good peak at what it would be like to be together with a demon you were ready to leave. Leaving behind a shattered heart, as well, when you told Seokjin you were leaving.

It was good that you left. You needed to leave. The others would never accept their demon king to be mated with a lowly human, like yourself, anyway. To the point blood was spilled for you, and that was something you never wanted to be your life. You didn’t want the responsibility of someone’s death, even a demons, to be your life. Packing your bags, and thanking the heavens that you didn’t sleep with Seokjin when temptation rose so many times.

“Yes…” You say after a moment to answer Jimin’s question. “He was a demon, and that’s in the past now. More importantly, who did you mate with? Is he your soulmate?”

Jimin raises a pointed eyebrow at you, confused by a part of your words. “Soulmate?”

You shut your eyes and sigh in annoyance. Of course whoever this demon was didn’t explain to him the entirety of Jimin’s new-lifelong-situation. Forget the mysterious and secret type. You being the one that was always being kept secrets from even if you were promised a part of their lives.

You explain to Jimin everything this demon undoubtedly didn’t tell him. That demons had soulmates, and it was very rare for humans to be their soulmates. Even more rare that they can successfully mate with them, since the premise of eating their soul was always on the table. But here Jimin is, alive and still has a soul. You knew that meant something, at least.

But the explanation doesn’t stop there. When a demon has a soulmate, they get possessive over them. What yours is mine, and what’s mine is mine type of thing. It’s even worse if the soulmate pair become mates, because then the pair is forever trapped with each other. It won’t affect Jimin, since he’s a human, but you bet your bottom dollar that the demon he mated with is somewhere hiding in the shadows inside your apartment right now. Watching Jimin with two black eyes.

You scoot closer to Jimin on your couch, when you start to explain the feeling they get from being away from their mated pair. Something you barely understand yourself, but try your best to explain “Basically, if a mated pair is away from each other for to long, it hurts them. Like, in the heart or some shit. That’s why mated pairs usually stay together always, but since you’re human you don’t have that problem.”

Jimin subconsciously looks around your apartment, expecting whoever his demon mate was to suddenly appear, but the coward stays hidden in the shadows—for now.

“B-but Taehyung didn’t tell me any of this! I don’t want him to be hurt, but I also don’t want to stay in that kingdom forever, either! I have school t-to finish and work to start a-and-… shit.”

Jimin sighs, and drags his body against the couch in defeat. This is what demons do. They trap lowly humans like Jimin and you, promising an amazing life, but once the entirety of that life is explained to you, you understand why most humans die in the hands of a demon instead of fall in love with them. For not being willing to give up their soul, or for this situation, their love.

You put your hand on Jimin’s knee, trying to sooth him. “It’s alright, hun. Maybe he’s different. Maybe this Taehyung won’t-… wait a minute. Did you say kingdom?”

Jimin said a lot before, but you didn’t realize until now that he said he would have to go back to the kingdom. There’s only one kingdom that you know of when involving demons, and it doesn’t just house the demon king, but also his close lackeys.

Jimin looks at you confused, not really in the mood anymore to talk about such trivial things like kingdoms when you basically told him his life maybe over. “Yeah… Taehyung lives there. Brought me there, and introduced me to the king. Why?”

You feel anger bloom within you first. Squeezing your eyes shut, and balling your fists when realization dawns on you. If Seokjin is involved with this, there’s no way this demon simply mated with Jimin without telling him everything first for no reason. You stand up, making Jimin jump by your sudden action, and you look around your apartment living room like you’ll suddenly be able to see the demon you’re looking for.

“Come out here!” You demand. “I know your there, so stop hiding like a little bitch!”

No one appears, making your blood boil even hotter as your furry flows through you. Jimin, on the other hand, is cowering in his spot on the couch. He’s never liked confrontation. You on the other hand would welcome it if necessary.

You decide your going all out to get the demon that screwed your friend over, and you grab onto Jimin’s hand and hoist him out of his seat. Surprised the demon doesn’t come out by just that action, but your not stopping there to get its attention, anyway. Jimin is staring at you wide eyed, and you know he’s about to be very confused after you do what you plan to do.

With the grab of his face, you pull him in to place a fat kiss right on his lips. Jimin squealing under your hold and wiggling around in your arms.

You know Jimin’s gay, and you don’t have a single attraction tendency for him, anyway. Sure, he’s attractive, but right now it feels like your kissing a sibling instead of a loved. You aren’t kissing him for long, though, because within seconds of your lips touching your lips are forcefully getting torn apart by something with nonhuman strength.

You get pushed against the couch, harshly. And after the whiplash wears off you look up to see a demon with black eyes, currently gray skin, and brown close to shoulder length hair keeping Jimin behind him and far away from you. You know he only looks like this because he’s angry, but out of all knowledge about demons one things always for sure.

Their possessive of what they think is theirs. And with that mate mark on Jimin’s neck, this demon, Taehyung, doesn’t like you touching his “property.”

“Don’t fucking touch him,” Taehyung growls at you.

You smirk up at the demon, feeling victorious even though he’s starting at you like he wants to tear your heart off. You put your hands up, faking surrender. “Surly. I’ll never touch him again once you explain why the fuck you’ve involved yourself with him.”

Taehyung squints your way, the color in his eyes and skin melting away as what he normally looks like comes back. What was once full of only black reveals brown human-like eyes. And what was once gray on his skin is now a sun kissed tan.

“Huh?” The demon has the audacity to look confused.

It’s Jimin’s turn to take his anger out on the demon. He jumps out of Taehyung’s tight hold, and puts himself in between me and him.

“Why didn’t you tell me about soulmates? Are we even soulmates?”

Taehyung’s once mutually angry demeanor diminishes once he sees Jimin’s close to tears expression. He reaches out to touch him, but Jimin swipes his hand away. Making the demon frown at his actions.

“Yes, Jimin, we are. I was going to tell you…” Taehyung makes work of looking at you accusingly. “But the king said to wait.”

Jimin squints, confused at Taehyung while I stare at him wide eyed. The demon looking over at me and telling me silently that he knows. Of course he knows, though! If he lives with Seokjin, then of course he knows about the human women that was once being prepared to be queen over them all. A life you left two years ago, and still today plan on staying away from.

But then there’s Jimin’s life…

“What does the king have to do with this?! Why does he care at all about me and you?”

Taehyung just keeps staring my way, and I know the answer to Jimin’s question because of it. That conniving bastard. How dare he involve my friend in all this! To, what? Get me back? As if!

I look away from Taehyung at the same time Jimin follows his line of sight to me. Jimin slowly putting the pieces together of why his life has suddenly been flipped upside down.

“Y/n… is King Jin, Seokjin?”

Your hands squeeze into white fists when you hear the nickname you gave him spoken out loud. Seokjin coining it as his new titled name when you were living with him, and keeping it that way after you left. You sigh, trying to breathe through your frustration and headache this all just put on you.

“Yes, he-… the king is Seokjin.”

Jimin’s jaw drops when you confess the connection between you and the most powerful being in the demon kingdom. Not liking how he’s suddenly fidgeting because he thinks he needs to bow or some shit like Seokjin used to make everyone do when they greeted you back when you lived with him.

“I-I-… I’m shocked!”

You roll your eyes. “Really?”

It’s Taehyung’s turn to interrupt. Him being most likely put in the dog house after all of this has been revealed. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Chim.“ What the fuck is that nickname? “But what the king says is law. I told you what Jin is capable of, and he used it against me and you to get to her. I-… I’m sorry you were involved in all of this.”

Jimin’s once vexed expression overturns when he faces Taehyung. The demon looking defeated about what he could not help, and you honestly believe it. The second he said he had no choice against Seokjin, you believed every word. He would always try to keep you out the heat of his fury by keeping you out of the “business meetings” altogether. But one day your curiosity got the better of you and you saw how far the kings abilities stretched.

Him being able to cause pain or kill others with just a look, and the threats of doing that being just as affective. Demons had many unique abilities, one being the ability to pop in and out of places whenever they pleased. Another being they can stay invisible to humans, and even rip their souls out of their chests when given permission—unless they kill them first, then they don’t need permission.

But Seokjin, he was the king. He’s lived as the king for a long time, and was handed down the powers of his father when he died all those centuries ago. One being the simple wish of someone’s death can happen within a blink of an eye.

You shiver when the nightmare of seeing that in person opened up in your mind. The sad part being the first time you saw it didn’t elevate you to leave. It wasn’t until that death was because of you that you left altogether.

After going through all these thoughts on your own, you look back at Jimin and Taehyung and grimace when you see the two making out. Whatever they said to each other while you were daydreaming about the past obviously being enough for Jimin to forgive him.

“Not that I discriminate, but-“ Jimin pulls himself off Taehyung when he hears you talk, and looks at you with a reddened face. The two of them forgetting you were even there while their tongues were tangled. “I prefer not to see my best friend get a hard on in my living room, thank you.”

Jimin looks at you with a glare full of death, and Taehyung smirks behind him. Grabbing onto his hand, and looking at Jimin like he holds the world in his hands.

Your heart aches when you see that look. You once had that look pointed at you from a demon and you remember like it was yesterday learning the extension of the love that look possessed. How endless a demons love could be, and how even after death they would stay loyally in love with you. So many mantra and quotes like that swirling in your head suddenly, and you shake your head when the person that told them to you appears in your mind.

Not wanting his angelic, handsome face to fill your mind anymore then it has today already. Not how beautiful his eyes were that when he looked at you it always made you swoon. Or how pillowy soft his full lips were when you two…

Ugh! Get it together!

“Alright!” You say, jumping out of your seat. Jimin and Taehyung look to you at your outburst. Jimin looking concerned, while Taehyung looks like he gives two shits less. “He wants to meet. Then will meet.”

Taehyung smiles triumphantly, while Jimin now looks more perturbed. “What! Y/n, no. You can’t do that. You haven’t seen the guy in years. What if this is all a trap to get you back?”

“Oh, it definitely is. It’s clear as fucking day that it is, but I’m not just going to let him mess with my friends lives either. He wants to meet. Then will meet… I just won’t be so full of sunshine like I was last time he saw me.”

Your gears are turning, thinking up all the ways you’re going to curse him out and Jimin is watching it all happen in front of him mortified.

“What! No, you can’t-“

“Chim, the king wants her. He didn’t give much specifics, just that he wants her back in the kingdom. And that he would…” Taehyung cuts himself short there. Like even uttering the threats or what Seokjin said would happen was too hard to say.

Jimin looks between the two of you conflicted about weather to console his lover or convince you not to go. In the end, he sighs in defeat. Whispering a “fuck,” under his breathe because he doesn’t know what else to say.

You slap your hands together, getting both of their attentions again. “Let’s get a move on, then. The sooner I can get this unwanted reunion over with the better. What’s the worst he can do, anyway?”

Kill you. Force you to stay with him. Threaten Jimin’s life if you don’t do what he wants.

And the lists goes on, and on, and on, but no one says anything as you all get ready to make the jump to Seokjin’s kingdom. You grab onto Jimin’s hand, not taking the offered one from Taehyung because even thinking about touching a demon makes your skin crawl, and you feel the dark energy consume your being when Taehyung starts the jump to another dimension.

Within a blink, all three of you leave your apartment like you weren’t even there to begin with.

———

When the black fog drifts away, you find yourself in the entrance hall of Seokjin’s castle, and your stomach drops to your fucking ass.

You forgot all the emotions being in this place used to stir in you. How you would get so excited about learning about all the artwork that was carved into every wall and ceiling. How you used to find it so fun to glide across the smooth granite flooring like you for ten, and the person you did this all with making your stomach do flips instead of sink.

You don’t know why you thought you would be so confident being here because now that you’re actually here your feeling dizzy. Letting go of Jimin’s hand to hold your forehead and wanting to pass out from all the nerves that shot through you.

Jimin turns to you instantly, his eyes widen when he sees you’ve become pale. “Y/n, are you okay? I know traveling that way can make some feel-“

“It’s not that,” You say with the wave of your hand. “I-it’s this place… a lot of emotions building from being here.”

Jimin looks guilty now, him being the only reason you’re here in the first place and if you weren’t so anti-violence you would smack it right off his face. You try to force a smile, but it turns into a frown when a sudden wave of nausea hits you after a hearing a friend of yours from so long ago speak.

“Welcome home, Y/n.”

You turn around to see a currently bowing Yoongi, one of Seokjin demon warriors. He’s been close friends with Seokjin for longer then either of them cared to comprehend, and he just so happens to be the loyalist of them all. One of the few who gave you any respect, and didn’t secretly threaten your life when the king was nor around.

He stand up from his bow, eyes shifting into black for a moment. You swallow even through your throat is dry, and wave awkwardly at Yoongi. “Hi, Yoon.”

The demon grins when he hears the nickname you coined him when you two first met all those years ago.

“It’s been far to long, my… it’s just been far to long.” You heard what Yoongi decided not to say. My Queen. A title that would have been your right to have if you and the demon king mated, and you hate how your body stiffens when you realize this. Thinking about the what ifs and being in the place you once called your home is not helping your resolve at all. Before you could go through another dizzy spell for all this swirling in your head, Yoongi speaks again. “The king has been expecting you. Taehyung, Jimin, you two can stay here. I’ll escort-“

“No.” Resolve is back. And your not playing by Seokjin’s games. “I’m not staying in a room alone with him.” You grab onto Jimin’s shaking hand to clarify that, and Taehyung’s eyes widen when you defy the elder demon in front of you. But Yoongi just smiles, not taking offense to your interruption or lack of understanding. You being one of very few he would allow this of.

“Ever the difficult one. Aren’t you, Y/n?”

You hold your ground, not paying attention to the wide eyed and scared Jimin next to you.

“Ever the vague one. Aren’t you, Yoons?”

You both crack a smile at this. You can’t help yourself. It’s like not a day has gone by since you saw your friend. The game of trying to up the other with words playing out just like it used to all those years ago.

But then your smile falls, realizing what Yoongi is doing. He’s reminding you of everything you left behind. Wanting you to enjoy your time here, and maybe even stay for the familiarness over everything else. You weren’t. You won’t.

“I stand at what I say. I’m not seeing him, or even being near him, alone. Jimin comes with me or will both leave together.”

Taehyung quiet gasp is heard behind you. His reaction this time being about the fear of losing his lover, and said lover stiffens beside you, but you pay them both no mind. Standing your ground as you look to the demon you once called your friend.

“I’m not sure if-“ Yoongi cuts himself short, and you see his eyes move back and forth as they swirl with darkness. Having a silent conversation with most likely the man of the hour himself.

Another ability some demons have is the ability to read minds. If two demons can read minds, then having silent conversations like this is possible. You would have be very old to obtain a power like that, though. Something you used to make fun of Seokjin adequately about.

After a moment, Yoongi sighs. “Alright. You can bring the other human. Taehyung stays here.” He sends a pointed glare Taehyung’s way, and you don’t understand what the hatred is for hidden behind those eyes. “Come with me.”

Jimin’s hand squeezes your own, and then you both follow silently behind Yoongi. You try to ignore Taehyung’s sudden and loud gritting of teeth as Jimin gets taken away from. Each step closer to Seokjin’s office had you begin to sweat and your heart beat in your ears, anyway. The memories of how happy you used to skip this way to him flooding your mind, and further making you sweat for different reasons.

The things that went on between you and Seokjin in all parts of the castle were rather… lewd. But you never went all the way. At the time you always got frustrated when Seokjin didn’t let you you two go all the way. To complete the mating ritual that was so tempting, but now your grateful you two didn’t.

You suddenly feel weird about that fact. Seokjin could have trapped you with him for life if you both just did what was so alluring to you both instead of hovering around it. But he didn’t. It definitely wasn’t for the lack of want, you’ve been proven by him enough times with his tongue and fingers to know he wanted you, especially when what was hidden underneath his pants rutted against you in the process. But still, he never pushed it further. Not even when you begged like a whore for him, or let him push his head inside you just to tempt him yourself.

You shiver at the remembrance of that day. When you both were sweaty, in his bed, and naked. He pushed you to two orgasms already, and he was so close to striking his own resolve away to just fucking you already. Pushing the head of his cock in between your widely spread legs, and the little stimulation blew your mind.

You can’t be doing this. You can’t be remembering these types of things, or any good times you spent with him. This is how he traps you. This is why he chorused you into coming. It’s just extremely hard not think of the past when every place you step is a reminder of the past.

When the three of you make it too the office door, you push all the positive memories aside. As a last resort, even though you haven’t imagined this day so clearly in quite sometime, you think about the day it all went to shit as Yoongi knocks on the door.

Seokjin doesn’t need to ask who it is because he already knows. You hear his smooth voice carry through the door, “Come in.”

The door is opened by Yoongi, and instead of looking anywhere in the room you stare right at the floor in front of you. Remembering the tragic day that had you running out of these doors four years ago…

———

You don’t remember why you decided that day to come to Seokjin’s office unannounced. In fact, you felt you should have never been there in the office even while you push open the door. Last time you were in here was when you accidentally saw him kill a demon with a snap of his fingers.

It’s okay, though. He explained to you why the demon needed to “go,” but it still haunted you to see the blood poor out of the unnamed demons eyes and nose. The second your eyes locked in on the scene in front of you that day, Seokjin had you both swirling in smoke and transporting you both into a different room.

He was shaking with worry, and Seokjin doesn’t worry. He doesn’t contemplate things that have not happened yet, but in that moment he thought you would want to leave him forever. Even if the demon he killed was a a bad guy. One that thought killing a whole school of children was a good way to gain power. That’s how demons gained their power, after all. If not from being handed down power from their parents, then from consuming souls of mortals.

You forgave him for that. You held him in your arms and consoled him of his worries. But right now, standing outside the office you once did on that day, you feel that familiar sting of fear in the back of your head. Like you shouldn’t be entering this office right now.

You shake your head front the thought, remembering that no one but Seokjin and his youngest lackey are probably in this office at the moment, and then you push open the door without announcing yourself. You never needed to. Seokjin just always knew it was you.

Your smell, he said one day, was the reason he always knew. It always had a rose undertone to it, and one that he’s never smelt before. He would say it was the most beautiful thing he’s ever smelt, and then he would ask you to never change. Never wear perfume or change what you do because you as your natural self was gorgeous as is.

So you push open the door with a small smile on your face for the joy of thinking you’re about to see your lover, but are disappointed when you don’t see him and instead see his youngest warrior.

Jungkook, the youngest demon in Seokjin’s kingdom, and the one who hates you the most. As your time here has lengthened, less and less people have decided to hate you. But Jungkook was not one of those few. Being young, and easily manipulated, he followed suit of his own father to think humans are nothing but batteries for demons to use to charge. And the fact that his king, the one he looks up to and wants to learn from, is soulmates with a human boils his blood.

The young demon scowls at you, and you try not to ignore the weight of knowing it’s only you and him in this room right now as you ask, “W-where’s Seokjin?”

He hisses at you, and it has you stumbling back a step. “What the fuck do you care? He’s not here and neither should you be.”

You straighten your posture, not letting this demon make you feel inferior just because Seokjin is not around to make everyone that defies you or him feel smaller. You never felt smaller around Seokjin, so you shouldn’t around this demon either.

“No. He asked me to meet him-“

“Ha!” You balk at Jungkook’s loud laugh, interrupting your words.

“What’s so funny?”

Jungkook’s smirk stretches to an irregular shape, and your two seconds away from running out the door because of it. “Your funny, little girl. To think Seokjin would ask you of anything but to spread your whore legs for him, makes me believe your lying.”

You raise a pointed eyebrow at him. Shocked and appalled by what’s he’s saying. “Well, your an asshole.” It’s Jungkook’s turn to looked shocked. “And yes he did. The maid came to me and-“

This time, you cut yourself short. Thinking back about the maid that summoned you here she looked… off. Almost possessed even. At the time you just played it off as her having an off day, but now that you see Jungkook’s gruesome smile you’re suddenly realizing your situation.

Jungkook was one of few demons, Seokjin included, that can manipulate other demons mind’s. Jungkook was second in line for Seokjin’s throne if he didn’t create an heir, so he had this ability as a high ranking demon.

“Looks like the sheep has finally realized her predicament.”

You don’t waste any time. Spinning on your heels you run towards the door, hearing Jungkook’s cackle of laughter behind you. Just when your hand clamps around the handle of the door, everything starts to turn black around you. The black fog of Jungkook’s mana surrounding you.

You scream bloody murder when you feel your skin start to heat up. A heat that is suffocating you, and making your screams turn into choked sobs. Falling to your knees and you try to look through the fog to find some light, but all you see is darkness. Each lung full of air you take feels like it’s laced with poison, and you start to spit out blood.

Unlike Seokjin, Jungkook’s abilities are much more slow. He can kill you, but it would take time. Something you find way scarier then just the blink of the eye killing, and for the first time you feel what it’s like. To slowly feel yourself die, and hearing a cackling laughter as you do.

You start to cry as you fall completely to the ground. Cradling your legs to your chest like it would somehow protect you. Each intake of air isn’t helping you stay alive like it should, but you push to keep your eyes open.

With one last resort, you yell for Seokjin. It comes out grumbled and a balk of blood comes out of your mouth as you do so, but you say his name nonetheless. You cry out his name because it’s the only person you can think of to save you, and he’s the love of your life. The person you want to be with for the rest of your life.

You want him to take care of you, and sleep next to you. You want to always be by his side, and have him tell you the stories about the carvings in the walls. You want to hear him tell you he loves you one last time, and have him smell your hair when just the whiffing of air around you isn’t enough. To feel his lips against yours just… one… last… time…

And that’s what you think about as everything turns black. Seokjin holding you close to him, your lips joined together and you whimpering when his tongue touches yours. Him chuckling against your lips from the knowledge of how easily your affected by his kisses. Then he would detach his lips from yours and tell you,

“I love you always.”

That near death experience should have been the worst of your day. It should have been the worst thing you ever witnessed or experienced, but it wasn’t. No. The worst thing you ever witnessed or experienced happened when you opened your eyes.

First, you’re surprised your not dead. You seriously thought you were a goner after Jungkook grabbed a hold of you. But your not. Your alive and your vision his slowly becoming clear as you smell the scent of blood in the air.

You think, at first, it’s your own blood. That the blood you spit out earlier was the culprit, but as soon as your eyes clear you see in front of what’s actually creating that metal taste in your mouth and nose.

Blood everywhere.

Blood on the walls, ceilings, and every piece of furniture in the room. It’s like someone painted the whole room with blood, and thought it looked nice enough to stay like that. It’s seeping out of every crevice of the room, and you gag at the overwhelming amount of it that you see and smell.

Your naïve enough to start patting your own chest, thinking it’s yours at first until you hear the person’s voice you thought about before blacking out behind you.

“Y/n,” Seokjin says in crying moan.

You turn around, thinking your lover will be able to explain what has happened here, but once you see him your at a loss. At a loss because you didn’t need to ask.

Seokjin has blood all over him. In his hair that you love to run your hands through, on his lips that you love to kiss, and on his clothes that you find yourself always nervously taking off. It’s all over him… but it’s not his blood.

You raise to your feet, staring at him wide eyed and jaw dropped. He takes a step forward, and your heart stings when you take a step backwards out of fear. Seokjin’s own eyes widen for a second, and you see his throat bob as he swallows.

“Y/n… this isn’t… he was going to hurt you.”

You didn’t need him to explain it. You didn’t need to explain that you were the cause of the young demons gruesome death because it was now painted everywhere. You don’t know why you didn’t expect any different. You don’t know why you didn’t expect any different from the king.

Maybe it was because you trusted him. You trusted him not to hurt other’s on your behalf, and that his possessiveness was only because he loved you. But right now, as your look at his bloody hands, you feel sick to your stomach.

Your the reason Jungkook is dead, and you love the murder to death.

———

You blink away the horror of a memory, and try your best not to choke on a sob. Smelling the air now is like you can still smell the metallic liquid everywhere. After that day, when Seokjin apologized to you over and over again for having to witness such a thing, you made a decision that would change the way you saw your future forever.

You left. You left because you didn’t want blood on your hands ever again even if it wasn’t you committing the murder. Even if the man went to attack you, kill you even, the knowledge of knowing he died so young and so gruesomely haunts you. You haven’t allowed yourself to think about that day for a long time, but you grab onto it as you and Jimin walk into the room, and you turn to see the person that still somehow makes your heart skip a beat every time you lock eyes.

“Hi Jin.”

Seokjin’s eyes lock with yours the second you allow them too. He stands from his chair as you walk into the room, and you hate the shiver that’s wanting to course through you when you see his face again.

The way he takes in your form, starting at your feet and ending at your eyes when they met for the first time. His ears twitching when he hears you say his nickname out loud for the first time in two years, and being so close to begging you to say it again, or worse... say his real name instead.

His heart sores at having you so close to him again, and you miss the way he quickly takes in a sniff of the air. Your rose aroma lighting up his senses and making him want to pull you into an embrace so he can sniff up your smell even more. How he’s longed to have you in his arms again, and right now you're no more than a few steps away. He can easily take a few steps forward and entrap you in his arms, but as much as it pains his heart to not do so he stays standing where he is.

You don’t know any of this. You don’t know any of what Seokjin is feeling because for one you can’t read his mind, and for two you're to distracted from seeing the person that once owned your whole heart in front of you.

He’s still as handsome as ever. Still beautiful in every way, and it doesn’t feel like a day has gone by since you saw him last. You remember being so starstruck when you first met him over four years ago, and you wondered how it was possible for a person to look so angelic.

You fingered out how two years later, when the angelic face you’re currently looking at revealed himself as anything but an angel. You want to smack yourself for staying with him after you were given that knowledge instead of running for the hills and seeing the red flag for what it was. The red flag that demons were anything but sexy. But you still see the man in front of you as what he is. As beautiful.

And you hate yourself and him for it. For him being born with looks that would make any girl gladly drop their panties for. You swallow down the increasing amount of saliva in your mouth that forms when he smiles at you. Wanting to run up and punch him in that pretty face of his for still being able to affect you like this.

“Hello, Y/n.”

You sharply take in air when he says your name. Suddenly all the ways he used to moan your name in your ears awakening in your mind, and you clench your jaw because of it. Scowling at the demon king.

A silence stretches, and you and Seokjin don’t take your eyes off each other for a single moment. You wonder if he’s read your mind just now, something he promised so long ago not to do but you’ve come to realize he’s bad at keeping promises, and you hope he has this time. Your hateful thoughts for him filling up your mind, and you hate him even more that when he frowns at your scowl you somehow still want to sooth him.

Jimin squeezes your hand, taking you out of your staring contest with Seokjin to look at your fearful friend. You sigh, bringing yourself back to reality but still holding onto the hatred you’ve convinced yourself you have for the demon in front of you.

“You wanted me here, now what?”

Seokjin chuckles at your straightforwardness. Loving and missing how you never feared to tell him how you truly felt. Soulmate bond aside, he thinks he would have fell for you even if it wasn’t there to begin with. Everyone was always afraid to tell him the truth about how they felt. Fear out of him killing them for speaking their minds, or for being tortured until they changed their minds.

This was a fear brought down on him from his father. To unpopular belief, and your past encounters with Seokjin making you think otherwise, Seokjin only kills others that rightful deserve it. He doesn’t kill others for having opposite opinions or even standing up for themselves. Justice in the demon world is very straight forward. You do something wrong, slap on the wrist. You break a law to the point it almost destroys everything the demons have created, then you die. There's no second chances for those who disturb the universal peace.

There’s only been one time that Seokjin ever killed for sport, and it was to protect you, but he knew it would come at a cost. Even before he ripped the young demon prince to shreds, he knew it would cost him his relationship with you. He wanted to be the man that you deserved and didn’t let his born with trait of being possessive and protective over you get in his way, but he couldn’t stop himself once he saw you the way you were. Dying and crying out for his help. So, he did what he promised you and himself he would never do. Killed someone—demon—for touching you like the possessive bastard he is.

And he doesn’t regret it. Losing you, yes, but never saving you. You're still alive today because of him, and he hopes having you back here will help you remember that fact about Seokjin. That he would always save you no matter what the cost was. Even if the cost was your love for him.

Seokjin steps forwards, closing the big gap between the three of you by five feet and you stiffen in your spot by the increasing proximity of the two of you. “Yes, you're here. Did you miss it?”

You raise a curious eyebrow at his dumb and sudden question. Of course you missed this place! But you’re not going to be telling him that. “No. I didn’t miss it no more than I missed you.”

Seokjin winces at your words, feeling them cut into his heart but he tries to remind himself you’re just angry and don’t mean it. You can’t mean it because your his soulmate and that type of love is never changing.

You feel a little guilty for your harsh words, but you stand your ground on the matter without blinking. There’s was no way you were going to be nice to this guy, even if you still find yourself desperately wanting him to smile again.

“Why did you want me here, Jin? Why did you want me here so badly that you even affected my friend?!” You punch out your words one by one, and you hope it hits him right in the stomach like you know his answer will do to you.

Seokjin smiles... and it kills you.

“You know why, y/n. It’s been two years, but I know you haven’t forgotten who we are to each other...” You squeeze Jimin's hand to the point he winces, and Seokjin glances down at your conjoined hands. He feels the slightest bit of jealous for the boy next to you being able to touch you like that, but he puts it to the side when he remembers who he is to Taehyung.

Looking back at you, he softens his voice when he confesses, “I still love you, y/n.” You shut your eyes, thinking that would somehow make his words disappear with your sight. “And I know you still love me.”

Eyes open again and full of accusation. “What happened to never reading my mind?”

“So you admit that you still love me?”

“Absolutely not!”

Seokjin chuckles, thanking all of his years of knowledge about you for what he’s about to say next. “Then why are your ears red?’

You subconsciously touch your ears with the hand not still in Jimin's, and curse at yourself. One thing you and Seokjin have in common is that your ears will turn red if you’re lying, even if your mind hasn’t caught up yet that you’re, in fact, lying.

“It’s hot in here,” You explain, trying to breathe through the lie this time and not make your face red as well.

Seokjin glides his bottom lip through his teeth before he smirks at you. He steps forward, and your back straightens. He steps forward until he's only a foot away from you, and you clench your teeth when the proximity has your knees almost buckling underneath you.

He knows what he doing. He’s thinking he can flirt or bat his eyelashes into making you fall in desperate love for him again, but no way were you falling for it. You won’t allow him to get to you.

“Well, we are in hell, darling. And you're standing in front of the king of it.”

You scoff. “Is that your new way of flirting? Throwing around your title like it will some how get me back.”

“Who says I'm flirting?” That smirk on his face does, and you realize now he’s wanting this banter. He’s wanting you to talk to him, and react how you used to anytime these types of play fights went on with the two of you.

So, you ignore his question and ask him another. “What if I don’t want to live here again?” His smirk falls. “I left for a reason. A reason that very much involves you, so why, in all ways, did you think bringing me here would suddenly change that? You do know it’s been two years. I know you do. But in two fricken years you thought the best way to win me back was to trap my friend in a relationship, and then bring me here to... what? Win me back with your flirtatious tongue and pretty face?”

You feel your face heat up from your last few words, Seokjin’s smile kicking back up at knowing you still find him attractive. Also, this wasn’t Seokjin’s first idea. It feels like his hundredth, but in reality he’s only had three real rational ideas.

One idea was to just... take you. That was the worst idea, and one that still pains him to think about, but it was an idea nonetheless. To claim you as his while you still loved him, and keep you with him forever. Once that toxic idea simmered down, his next idea of talking to you in person was brought up.

Seokjin has secretly looked over you for the past two years a lot, and some of those times he wished he didn’t. The day he decided to reveal himself to you, to talk to you and convince you he’s not a bad guy and still loves you... you were on a date. Seokjin knows if he were to even say the guys name you wouldn’t remember, since that date was the first and the last time you ever saw him, but it was still a date. A way for you to get over Seokjin, and in return break his heart further.

Seokjin isn’t a very jealous person, but he finds himself always jealous of the people you allow close to you besides him. It never got to the point where he wanted to control you, that’s not who he is. But when he saw you on the date with that guy, he wanted to rip him to shreds. He wanted to kill him for gaining the attraction of you like he once did, and then devour his soul so there was no chance of another one of him in the future.

Seokjin got very depressed after that. He didn’t leave his room because if he did he was afraid he would go and kill the guy, and then prove you right that he was exactly like his father and all the other blood thirsty demons he’s executed in the past. It wasn’t until a whole month had passed that he finally left his room, finally calm and able to breathe, so he decided he had to be creative with his next plan.

It just so happens that on that exact day, Taehyung, his newest demon recruit to his castle and the youngest, admitted he found his soulmate. He said a lot of regretful things to the young demon that day. A lot of regrettable threats that he knows he will have to apologize to him one day for, but it’s all worth it if he gets to say to you the words that make you react the way you do.

“No. That’s not how I'll be winning you back because I know you. You're not someone who can be toyed with, or deserves to be either... It’s just-... I’m desperate, y/n. I’m desperate for you because I fucking love you, and it pains me to the fucking core that I made you so scared of me that day that you left me. I just—If you could just-…Please just give me one more chance. A year tops, please.”

You don’t even realize you’ve let go of Jimin’s hand until Seokjin is finished speaking. Your heart, stomach, fucking brain cells feel like they all are about to explode! You’re surprised even when a tear leaks down your face, and you allow Seokjin to place his hand on your cheek and wipe it away with his thumb. He takes his hand away right after, but you don’t miss the way you both shivered at the small contact.

You swallow over the lump in your throat, trying and failing to keep up the tough girl act as Seokjin’s sweet words till echo in your head. Seokjin has always been so good with words, and you had a feeling that if anything were to destroy your resolve of never staying here again it would be Seokjin's incredibly beautiful words.

Words he only always said to you.

“One week,” You say in response, and Seokjin smiles with teeth and all.

“I’m charming, but I'm not that good... six months.”

“One month.”

“Forever.”

You roll your eyes, and find yourself cracking a smile when he chuckles at his own funny way of make this deal seem less like a business venture. But a deal with the devil it still is.

“One month... Seokjin.”

You’re a little devilish too because once his name on your lips registers to his ears, you could have said a day and he would have blindly said, “Deal.”

———

A few things happened on that first day in the kingdom, one of them being that as soon as this deal was set, Jimin was “suddenly” needed to be somewhere with Taehyung. You called bullshit, but you let him go nonetheless because you know from experiences that the best place for Jimin to be is with his soulmate—who just so happens to be a demon too, and why you’re in this whole mess in the first place, but you’ll continue yelling at the pair about that fact later.

Seokjin luckily had a meeting to go to, and that just left you by yourself… mostly. You once lived in this castle, so you thought maybe Seokjin just trusted you to know your way around the place.

WELL! No more than an hour later, you realize what “being left on your own” meant for you for now on. It meant a barely concealing himself Yoongi was around. As soon as you felt his presence, you were in one of the hallways that the bedrooms stretched through. You stopped in your tracks, rolled your eyes, then yelled out into the not so empty hallway, “You can come out at any time!”

Yoongi then popped his head out behind a sculpture, his invisible cloak of power falling off of him. You smile at the blonde headed demon, and wait in your spot until he stands next to you. The you both continue on your re-tour around the castle side by side.

“I maybe just assuming somethings, but it seems like you were following me,” You say with an accusing raised eyebrow, and thinned out lips.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I said no, would you?”

“Nope.”

“Thought so.” You chuckle at Yoongi’s way of just easily getting around the subject. You secretly wanted to ask if Seokjin set him up to do this, but you didn’t want to seem like you-

“Yes, he very much did.”

You sputter at his invasion of your head. Smacking him in the shoulder for good measure. “Don’t do that!”

Yoongi just shrugs his shoulders like it’s no big deal, but then he lays on you an accusation thats very much a big deal. “Why do you care if Seokjin thinks you like him?”

“Because I don’t. You all know I don’t want to be here, so showing any bit liking his way would be futile for me.”

You both hit a sharp turn in the hallway, and Yoongi looks at the back of your head like you’re crazy. Out of all demons, Yoongi doesn’t really care much about human. He doesn’t care if there around or not, just as long as they stay out of his and his kings way, and currently, you’re in his kings way. Making him freeze all important meeting for the next month as we speak.

Seokjin didn’t tell you this, of course, but he doesn’t want a single distraction when it comes to winning you back. That includes meetings like which clan gets which part of earth to feed off of. Seokjin is the one to make those decisions, but since he’s going to be putting it on hold for you, Yoongi would rather push this little drama fest a long as much as possible. “But you do love him.”

You stop in your tracks again, breathe through your nose, then turn to face your demon friend. “No. I. Do. Not! ... Why does everyone keep saying that?”

“Huh, I don’t know. Maybe because A, I remember what you two were like when you lived here—disgusting to watch, by the way—and unlike Seokjin I don’t give a shit about what you think about reading your thoughts.” You’re about to tell him that you don’t think anything of the sort. That he’s clearly reading someone else’s mind, but then he leans in closely to you and says, “So an seven inch dildo was the closet in size, huh?”

Your jaw drops and your face becomes as red as a tomato.

Yoongi looks at you with a neutral face, not even giving you time to explain or hit him as he continues to walk forward and yells back at you, “Yup. So not in love.”

Okay, so, he was clearly talking about the toy you bought and what you... bought it for. It was weak moment for you. A couple of months ago you started to feel very low, and your dreams of Seokjin suddenly become a regular basis thing. You were lucky that after you left and got settled, that your mind was only consumed with thoughts of Seokjin at night maybe once a month, but out of nowhere it became an every night thing.

You hated your head, and you hated your body for reacting in such a way when the dreams became sexual. It got to the point that you manned up and bought a fricken sex toy to satisfy yourself. Thinking it would help with the dreams at least a little bit. Seven inches being the best you can find and best to compensate with your dreams. But those dreams don’t mean you love him still. There's a difference between sexual attraction and love. One of which you think you’ll sadly always have for the demon king while the other one you kicked out of your headspace a long time ago.

Just when Yoongi turns a corner to leave you there alone in the hallway, you shout at him, finally getting over the shock of what he said, “That doesn’t mean I love him!”

“What doesn’t mean you love who?”

You jump, crying out, “Jeaus!,” and spinning around to see an already smirking Seokjin. He has his arms behind his back, and you have a feeling by the way he’s looking at you right now that he heard your entire conversation.

You wipe at your face like that will some how remove the very prominent blush on your face, then stutter out a unconvincing, “N-nothing.”

“Mhmm,” Seokjin says as he leans in closer to you. “Sure it was.”

You roll your eyes, and cross your arms in a pout. Not missing the way Soekjin’s eyes flick downwards toward your breasts popping out of your shirt now when the action pushed your breasts upwards. You also don’t miss the way you feel the smile grow on your face because of it. Stupid ass emotions. Always making hating other people more difficult!

“Have you found your way around, okay?”

You roll your eyes again, and turn to continue on your track of wondering around the castle. Seeing in the corner of your eye a still grinning Seokjin walking next to you.

“Yup. I did live here for two years, in case you forgot.”

Seokjin chuckles at your attitude filled answer, “Trust me, la mia rosa. I have not forgotten.”

You turn you head to the other side, shut your eyes and trying your best not to stutter when you demand, “Please don’t call me that.”

Seokjin bites his bottom lip, trying to stop his smile from growing. “Why would I do that? I also haven’t forgotten how it used to affect you.”

La mia rosa. Translating from Italian to English it means my rose. A name that used to turn you into a puddle of goo when he called you that, and he nor you have forgotten said feelings it brought up in you.

You turn back to face him, ready to lie through your teeth and say it’s not like that anymore, but once you turn Seokjin has put himself mer inches away from you. Clearing any words that were going to come out of your mouth. You back up, and he follows with each step. It’s not until you hit a wall that he stops in his tracks, but you have to look upwards more to talk to him directly. His already tall frame making your neck also have to stretch and reveal your neck to him.

Seokjin’s eyes are drawn to the smooth surface of you neck. A place he remembers drawing out the symbol of his mate mark on, but never pushing himself to do so. He watches a single drop of sweat drip down your neck, and he’s so tempted to wipe it clean for you. To touch your skin again and feel one of many favorite parts he enjoyed kisses and nipping to the point you would wither underneath him.

It isn’t until you whisper his name, suddenly sounding like your mouth has gone dry, that Seokjin’s eyes flick back towards you. He moves forward, and you’re helpless to let his nose trace your own. Breathing in sharply when you feel a part of his you used to love admiring so close to you. Unable to control yourself, your eyes flick down to his lips. His plush lips so close to touching your own, and you have to hold yourself back from falling into them. His lips are just so-

“Say it again,” Seokjin begs of you.

You blink up at him, staring up at him through your eyelashes and suddenly feeling ten times hotter then you were a few moments ago. “W-what?”

Seokjin smirks, and for the first time since seeing him again you’re not mad at him for it. His close proximity is dizzying, and making you forget everything you promised yourself. “I said, say my name again... please.”

You swallow, glancing around the hallway. But each time your eyes move they are trained back to his own. It’s like a vortex. You unable to look away, but feeling like you shouldn’t be around the destructive pools. The please is what gets to you, though. It’s asked so gentle, and almost like he’s dying to hear you say that singular word as much as he needs air to breathe. You lick your lips, whimpering when his nose slides across your forehead next.

“Please, la mia rosa.”

And now you’re helpless not too.

“Seokjin.”

The demon sucks in air through his teeth. Such a small gift from you has made his once dying heart shutter at the sound. Seokjin has dreamt about you so many times since your departure from his life, but never, not once, did you call him by his real name in his dreams. It became a torturing affair. Just a few months ago the dreams would repeat themselves and then slowly started making him restless.

You would be in his bed, and the dream would always start and end the same from there. He would think it feels so real. That you've come back to him and want to complete the ritual of making you his mate. Seokjin wouldn’t hold back because he was desperate for you. Waiting two whole years—no, six years to finally make you his in every way has made him this desperate. But then, when you would speak, it wouldn't be of his name.

Always Jin. It's a nickname you gave him, and he adored it, but it wasn’t his name. Even if he asked you to say it, you wouldn't. No matter what the scenario, you would never say his name.

So right now, Seokjin is a mess. He falls to his knees in front of you, not caring if anyone were to pass and see their king in such a lowly state. He’s embracing your middle, and you freeze when you feel his two strong arms wrap around you.

“Oh my god, what are you doing?” He stays silent. “Seokjin?”

And then you hear weeping. Crying against your stomach is the mighty demon king himself because you said his name. Not that you forgave him, or even want to be with him again, but you simply being here—being real—and saying his name has broken the demon king right down the middle.

“I've waited for you for so long,” Soekjin says through a sob. “Fuck, I've missed you so much... You have no idea how much it hurt to be away from you.”

Your eyes widen, replaying his last words. He said something earlier about being in pain for not being by you, but you just thought it was him being dramatic with his sweet words. Now, as he withers on his knees in front of you, you know what he says is completely real.

Most of your relationship with Seokjin revolved around you finding out information about the demons soulmates and mating rituals through small hints. But one thing that has you holding back a sob is what he just said to you. Something you know will happen for sure if the two of you were to ever....mate.

“H-hurt you?”

Soekjin nods against your stomach, inhaling your sweet smell like it’s his lifeline and squeezing his arms tighter around you. “Yes, la mia rosa. Hurt so fucking much.”

“B-but I thought... but we never...”

Seokjin understands what you’re implying, and he sighs against your stomach. He was a terrible person when you two were together. He kept so many secrets from you, and with that mixing up your knowledge of his world with it. It's true, if you two were to mate and complete the bond between the two of then it would pain Soekin to the very core of him to be away from you. It’s one of the reason why he never pushed completing the ritual because he knew you would hate to have someone so obsessed with you. It was even one of the first things you told him after he portrayed his possessive tendencies the first time.

One man walking down the street whistling at you, and Seokjin was ready to rip his throat out. It wasn't until you slapped him in the face, and told him to calm the fuck down that he was fine again. Black eyes turning brown, and gray skin turning white again.

But the thing is, you don’t need a complete the mate bond for a person to feel pain from being away from the other person they love. No, this has to do with Seokjin’s love for you. His undying devotion towards you. He doesn’t need a soul or mate bond to tell him he never wants to be away from you because he has enough pure love for you to know he would never want to be without you again.

“This isn’t the mate bond, y/n.” Soekjin whispers against your stomach. He looks up at you at the same time you look straight down at him. Your eyes meeting and never straying from each other. “This isn’t the soul bond either.”

He takes you hand at your side, and places it on his heart. The rapid beating of it under your palm making your breathing stop altogether.

“This is because I love you always.”

———

A few things happened on that first day in the kingdom. Yes, a few strange but heartwarming things. You ended up sitting there with Seokjin, feeling lighter than air, for what felt like hours. Some moments were filled with silence, while other’s were formed with chatter of all the things you've missed from each others lives.

It was hard not to let go of the past when Seokjin was literally on his knees and confessing his feelings to you all over again. You even made it a point to tease him about it eventually, and comparing it to the first time he told you he loved you.

It was the same day you found out he was a demon, but before that whirlwind of knowledge he decided to lay on you a whirlwind of emotions. You never saw Seokjin shed a tear before, but he cried many happy tears that day when you told him you loved him back and that you have for awhile. Seokjin is a very emotional being, but sadly he only ever feels safe enough to express those feelings when with you even to this day.

It’s crazy to think of everything that’s transpired since then. How many heart aches and heart throbs you and Seokjin have went through, and put on each other. One gut wrenching thing being having to ask where your room was, since you never really had your own room in the kingdom.

You know Seokjin was thinking the same thing as you. That you never had your own room because once you moved into the castle your spot was always next to him even while sleeping. But even after everything he’s literarily laid at your feet of emotions, you still can’t forgive him. Not yet, anyways.

It’s only been one day since you've reunited, and you're not letting go of what you promised yourself. And you continued to keep that promise for the days that followed. You stayed at a safe distance since the moment you two shared in the hallway, and kept yourself busy with walking around the castle with Jimin.

It wasn’t until one night, a week after you've arrived, that you find yourself breaking your promise to yourself once again...

It was a restless night for you. The plaguing dreams of Seokjin and you walking around the castle once when you first entered the kingdom all those year ago resurfacing out of nowhere. You luckily woke up before the dream of a memory got to the part where he kissed and pinned you against a tree that day, and you suddenly felt very thirsty.

You looked around the mauve room, feeling a chill run down your spine as the darkness makes the already dark interior more horror movie-ish. You shake your head, remembering the fact that you’re in a castle full of demons, and that the boogie man or whoever it is that comes out from under kids beds has nothing on your castle companions.

You get up from the bed, hearing the not very used mattress creak underneath you as you stand. You wonder why that room was even there in the first place, but when you brought it up in front of Jimin, Taehyung felt welcomed to tell you it was made for the kids future wife. If the king never found his soulmate, then most likely he would have to be a part of a loveless marriage and that would be the queens room. Knowing what that room was supposed to be used for, and that it’s you out of all people that get to sleep in it made you feel... honestly, you weren’t sure at this point.

You do know, however, that you're very thirsty. You walk to your bedroom door, about to roam down to the kitchens only used for human guests since demons didn’t need to eat real food, to get a glass of water. But your thirst disappears once you open the door.

With the pull of the wooden doors handle, a once sleeping Soekjin falls down with it. Him waking up instantly when his head hits the floor. You stare down at him, wide eyed and baffled that he was sleeping on the floor and against your bedroom door.

“Seokjin! What are you doing here?” You whisper yell at him even though no one else but you sleeps in this hallway that your room is located at.

Seokjin blinks up at you, suddenly realizing he’s been caught sleeping outside your room, and then stands up to his full length in the blink of an eye. He smooths out his black leather jacket that he’s still wearing since daytime, and tries to play off what he's been doing everyday since you arrived here as something new.

“I couldn't sleep.”

You glance around the room like it will have a better answer than the one he just gave you. “So you'd decided the best way for you to sleep was outside my room?”

He nibbles on his bottom lip nervously, and realizes there’s no real better way to explain this situation with anything but the truth. “I sleep better when I'm near you, and-... and I just wanted to be near you.”

His last few words are said in a a whisper, but everything is so quiet right now that you heard everything. Your hand goes slack on the door, and you feel your whole body deflate when looking at a desperate looking Seokjin. A look you’ve been seeing on him a lot lately when he’s trying to get your attention. Attention you've been trying to point at anyone and anywhere but him.

You sigh, and give into your resolve when the guilt of what you have been doing suddenly hits you. The man told you it hurts him to be away from you, and you’ve been trying to do exactly that. Now, that’s just cruel. So, with another breathe of a sigh and seeing Seokjin’s pouty look, you gesture your arm into the room.

“Just get in here.”

Seokjin smiles brightly when you offer him to come in, but he tries to cover it up right after by coughing into his fist. You try to hold back a smile as you watch him walk into your room, him acting like a smiling doofus about it and failing at covering up his happiness.

Before you could second guess yourself, or even think about how this is going to be incredibly awkward, you get back into bed and under the covers. Not facing Seokjin who’s currently standing on the other side of the bed. You quickly tuck yourself in, pressing the blanket high up to your neck even though your white oversized t-shirt, and blue Mickey Mouse shorts are not even close to anything sexy. You face the opposite wall and hold your breathe to hear what Seokjin is doing next to you.

It takes him a whole minute to move, but when he does you hear what sounds like a movement of clothing—him probably taking off his leather jacket from earlier— and then you feel the bed dip as he gets into bed. It’s complete silence between the two of you now. You could hear a pin drop in this room, but that’s expected when you both are supposed to be going to bed. But after what just transpired, not to mention you have your ex laying were inches away from you, there’s no way you’re going to sleep anytime soon.

Seokjin shifts in his spot in the bed, and you suddenly feel heat radiate against your back. You squeeze your eyes shut, hoping he’ll think you’re asleep, but he already knows your not.

“Y/n,” He whispers close to your ear, and you have to hold back a shiver when you fell his breathe fan your hair. “I know your not sleeping.”

You sigh, opening your eyes, but not turning to face him. “What do you want, Jin?”

He smiles when he hears you hiss out his nickname. Still as feisty as ever. “Can-… can I hold you?”

Can he hold you? Can he hold you. You should scream the answer no. Kick him out for even suggesting such a thing, but instead you say nothing. The silence stretches between you two, and you guess Seokjin took that nonanswer as a yes because then your feeling an arm wrap around your middle.

You stiffen when you feel his strong arm hold you, him resting his chin against your shoulder.

“W-what are you doing?” You know what he’s doing. He’s cuddling you, but what you don’t understand is why?!

Seokjin suddenly sniffs in your hair, and it takes everything in your power not to whimper when he does that. He used to love sniffing up your scent especially in your hair. Although to some that seems so weird, but to you it was always so adorable. Like he loved every part of you so much that he even loved the shampoo you choose to use.

“Nothing,” Seokjin says. But it’s not just a whisper like before. It sounds deeper, alluring even. You try to close your eyes again, but you can’t help yourself and peak downward when his hand starts to rub at your stomach through the shirt.

“Is this, by any chance, my shirt?” You can hear the smile in his voice, and it makes you want to kiss it off. I MEAN SMACK IT OFF! Fuck he’s making this hating him thing so hard right now.

It is his shirt. A shirt you stole from him before you left the castle the first time, but your not going to admit that to him.

“No, it is not your shirt.”

“Oh, really? Then who’s shirt is it?”

You try to think of a good enough answer. You could have just said it was yours and you have a liking of oversized shirts, but because your feeling like being a total bitch tonight for some reason you say something that you know will really get him heated, but at the same time isn’t a total lie.

“An exs.” Seokjin stops rubbing your stomach, and you smirk when you hear him growl close to your ear. “Should probably return it to him, actually. Been awhile since I’ve seen him.”

You feel Seokjin stiffen behind you, and you think he’s totally bought your somewhat-lie. But then he’s breathing out a sigh of relief, and your raising an eyebrow at the wall in confusion.

“It is your exs.”

“Huh?”

“Because it’s mine… trust me, I know my shirts when I see them. Especially since this is the only shirt that went missing after you… left.”

You shut your eyes when you feel yourself getting emotional from how he said the word left. Like it was painful for him to say it in the same sentence, so he had to space it out. Making it seem like you leaving wasn’t real.

“Maybe it is,” You mumble to yourself without even thinking, and even though he says nothing in return you can imagine him smiling behind you right now. It’s a smile you used to cherish so much that you can imagine each one of his straight white teeth in a row.

The silence stretches between the two of you again, and he’s resumed rubbing your stomach. All you can hear now is his breathing close to your ear, and it’s relaxing you to the point you feel your eyes actually slowly shutting to fall asleep. Just when you’re about to close your eyes again, readying the whole sequence of going into dream land, you feel a singular kiss against the back of your neck that has your whole body wide awake again.

You stiffen, and that singular kiss vibrates throughout your whole body. When you don’t say anything or even protest against it, Seokjin kisses the same spot again. Drawing out the press of his lips against you this time. You don’t move, and you don’t say anything. Instead, you shut your eyes and just allow it to happen. It’s been far to long since anyone has kissed you that way, and right now you’re too relaxed to care who it is.

Seokjin continues to press slow kisses against the back of your neck, and when he rounds your neck to kiss the side of it you stretch your neck to give him more access. He smiles during the kiss to the side of your neck when you do this. That you’ve finally just sercombe to letting him love you the way he used to.

Although, if your memory is correct, when he would kiss you like this it would lead to much more dirty and sensual things. You can’t let him do that. You shouldn’t let him push any further. This is enough freedom for him for tonight so you should really tell him to-

Seokjin slips his hand underneath your shirt at the same time he kisses behind your ear. Him kissing your sweet spot he knows so well at the same time his fingers dance across your stomach has you gasping. He continues to smile as he touches and kisses you, and now you’re practically shaking in his grasp. Your not sure if this is because you’re basically touch starved or if you actually like it, but you even let out a soft moan against closed lips when he nibbles at your ear.

He groans against you ear when he hears the first moan he’s coaxed out of you in two years. Dragging his hand up higher, so it’s right below your breasts on your sternum.

Without removing his face from near your ear, he whispers to you invitingly, “Do you want me to keep going?”

God, fuck, say no! Just do it! Rip off the brand aid and have him get off of you. Be the tough, strong girl you’ve been acting like this past week and get him away from you!

You may have thought all these things more then once, but instead you say in a small voice, “please.”

Seokjin bites his bottom lip, staring down at your restless expression from the side, and then he resumes kissing down your neck. With the slowest of movements you feel his hand that was once resting at your sternum traveling into the valley of your breasts. His wrist making contact with your already hard nipple, and you don’t hold back the breathy moan that comes out of you this time.

After a few more kisses at your neck, and a few other ghostly touches around your breasts, Seokjin removes himself from you entirely. You blink open your eyes and stare at the wall. You’re actually about to protest against him leaving you, but once you look to the side to look at him directly he’s going down your body and straddling your ankles. Yes, ankles.

His face is right at your now exposed stomach, and he places a soft kiss against the exposed skin. You bite your lips as you watch him cascade both his hands up your stomach and under your shirt again. When his hands finally cups your breasts, you arch your back up into them. Moaning as he pinch’s and press against your nipples with both hands all the while he continues to assault your stomach with kisses.

In between moans and explosions of pleasure, you look down at Seokjin and see his eyes already directed at you. It makes everything you’re already feeling right now ten times worse.

“Fuck, Seokjin!” You cry out when he twists your nipples with his pointer and thumbs. He groans into a kiss against your stomach, moving his face kiss yo your stomach faster then he did before. When his center reaches your leg, you feel his hard cock against your cafe. Now you know the magic word to get him going.

You say his name over and over, each one louder then the last. Just like you’re touched starved for love he’s starved for your whimpers. He ruts against your thigh, and you have to grab onto his shoulders to steady yourself—tilting your head back as you moan out his name again.

“Shit, baby, you sound so pretty. I missed your voice so much. I missed you so much,” You feel tears float down your face, and it’s because you’ve missed him too. You missed being this close to him, and talking to him, and just holding him. You missed all the things only your dreams allowed you to have for two years.

“mmm… I missed you too.”

With one last pull on both your nipples, Seokjin pushes your shirt up until both your breasts are exposed to him. He attaches his mouth to your left nipple. Nibbling and sucking on the bud as his hand pinches and twist the other one. You grab onto his hair—not too hard to pull it, but enough to keep him there. Not like he was actually going to go anyway. His tongue swirls the bud and your arching up into his mouth so he can some how take more of you.

If Seokjin could, he would consume all of you. He’s practically trying to suck your nipples right off your body, and making them feel sensitive to the touch. You’ve always been so sensitive on this part of you, and it just so happens to be his second favorite part of you to touch. His first favorite part being what’s currently extremely damp in between your legs.

“More, Seokjin. Please give me more!”

Your pussy is throbbing by now, and you want more then anything to feel his fingers inside of you… well, there’s one other thing, but you know he would never do that to you. He’s lucky to have you the way he does right now. He can wait a little bit longer to ask you to be his mate, and finally complete what’s been teased over both your heads for far too long.

Seokjin detaches himself from your nipple, smirking up at your fucked out expression. You don’t think there’s been a single time you’ve closed your mouth since he started touching your nipples. Having to lick your lips since they’ve gone dry.

“More? What could I possible do, that’s more?” Seokjin closes in on your lips. Hovering above the one place he has yet to kiss at the same time one of his hands touches your thigh. It’s all a losing battle. Everything with Seokjin against you is making you crumble into the bed, and you honestly forgot what it was like for you to try and hate him.

You never hated him. That’s why. Not for a single second. You were angry, yes. Upset, most definitely. But you never once hated him. Now it’s just a call of if this relationship is right or now, but at the moment you don’t care if it is. You just want him to touch you and kiss you until you pass out from oversensitivity.

So you say, “Anything you want.” And you mean it. You would give him your heart if he asked you right now, and you know he would do the same if his groan from your words means anything.

Seokjin smashes his lips to yours, and what starts out as a small whimper turns into a loud moan against his lips. The hand once on your thigh digging right under your shorts and stroking your clit immediately. As much as you want to enjoy the first taste of his lips you’ve had in two years, the stimulation he’s giving your clit right now is making it hard to focus on anything else.

He eventually does detach himself from your lips, biting his lip right after with wide eyes so he can capture everyone of your faces that you’re making right now.

“So beautiful, y/n. Your so pretty and so fucking hot… I bet your still tight as you used to be.”

You grab onto the bed sheets when his finger starts to slide across your entrance. The tip of his finger almost going in because you’re so wet from all the stimulation he’s been giving you up until now.

“I-I-… I haven’t…” You can’t even say it. But you want too. You want to make sure he knows the truth about what exactly this part of you has been doing the past two years.

“Huh? Couldn’t quite catch that, baby. Looks like you’ll have to say it again.” He’s smiling, and you want to kiss the smile right off of him. That’s right kiss. Forget your incompetence earlier, you want to kiss those plush lips until you can’t breathe anymore.

You swallow, trying and failing not to moan as his thumb starts to rub at your clit now. He’s really not making it easy to talk right now… or breathe… or even think!

“I said… I could n-never—fuck!—I could never find the right size!” You literally screamed your words as his finger finally enters you. All so he can stop again and look at you with a question in his eyes.

“Right size?”

You swallow, face heating up because you know what you’re about to say is either going to embarrass you forever or make Seokjin so hard he’ll cum in his pants.

“I haven’t been with anyone else since you.” Seokjin slowly nods his head in understanding. “But that doesn’t mean I didn’t use… other things to fuck myself with.”

Fuck. You said it. And Seokjin heard every word—understood every word. You were right. He’s hard as a fucking rock to the point he needed to bite his bottom lip so hard it almost bled to not cum. A bunch of images of when you would play with yourself surfaced in his brain. He would stop watching you in the shadows immediately when he realized he came to secretly see you at a time like that, leaving the area altogether, but that didn’t stop him from jerking off into his pillow when he teleported home.

“A-and…” Seokjin coughs into his hand that’s not currently inside you, slowly moving that hand again too. “What would you think about when you fucked yourself?”

You tilt your head back, enjoying the slow pleasure he’s pressing into your walls right now. “That’s just it. I-it was never big enough to be real.” You open your eyes to look at him. “But I always thought of you.”

He couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t take the teasing from you any longer. Seokjin smashes his lips against yours again, and it’s like he’s trying to consume you as he does it. Attacking your tongue, biting your lips, not a single part of your lips or mouth was safe from him. And neither was your pussy.

Seokjin slips in a second finger at the same time he moves his legs in between yours. He’s now fully on top of you, and you feel his rock hard cock through his pants against your thigh.

Fuck you want him to fuck you. Fuck but you really shouldn’t. It’s an ongoing battle in your brain as his fingers fuck you so good, and you feel him hump his clothed cock against your leg.

You remember the first time you ever saw it. How you were scared shitless at thinking he would split you in two, but feeling lucky that he didn’t take you that night. It was just the night after that, and every night after that, that you were practically begging him to take you then.

Feeling him in your hands was a different experience. It was something you could never fit your mouth, but in your hands it felt like you controlled the demon on top of you by the literal balls.

So, while you two were still kissing, Seokjin had you clenching around two long curved fingers, and you snaked your hand in between your sandwiched bodies. You grab ahold of him instantly—since he’s not very hard to find—and swallow his gasp that soon turns into a rumbling moan.

Your only touching him through his lose fitted clothes, but Seokjin is so hard right now he thinks he’ll be cumming like a virgin soon enough. “Fuck, I missed your hand on me. Keep touching me, baby.”

You were going to say a sultry gladly, but then you feel his lips on your neck’s sweet spot again and moaned. You stroke his length with earnest. Wanting him to feel as good as he is making you right now. And your “feeling good” is about to hit its ultimate peak when Seokjin pushes another finger inside of you. Stretching you out and making your eyes roll into the back of your head.

You don’t even realize your hand has stopped stroking but still wrapped around him until you feel him start to fuck your hand. Fucking your juicy pussy at the same pace with his fingers.

“Fuck! Seokjin, I’m gonna cum!”

He continues to bite and kiss at your neck, fingering you relentlessly, and fucking himself into your hand as you ride out your earthquaking—no, shattering orgasm. You honestly have no idea how you’ve been able to satisfy yourself up until now because the orgasm that rips through you has you close to passing out.

Seokjin feels you almost collapse underneath him, and he pushes himself to completion. All he needed to do was feel you cum all over his hand, and grab ahold of your breast one last time to push himself there. Still grinding against your hand until his own orgasm ceases.

He slowly peels your hand off of him, and himself off of you. Gently rolling you both over so you’re right up against each other the whole time. You feel lighter then air. Someone could punch you right now and you wouldn’t be able to feel it. You do feel, however, Seokjin’s arms wrap around your middle again and him lay your head against his chest.

Just before you pass out from utter bliss, you feel him kiss your temple, and whisper against forehead,

“And now we have forever, la mia rosa.”

That’s not completely true, however. Because for Seokjin he always had forever for you. A forever love for you, and an endless loving soul to share with you. One that as soon as you give him the okay now, no matter how long it takes, he will tell you everyday what it truly means to be soulmates with a demon…

That he loves you always and forever.

Part two

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