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#and i dont know what else to tag. i never got around to making the rest of the crew :(
microfeelings · 21 days
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Yeah I'm sharing them now because if I decide to wait to pass them digitally I will ✨never do it✨
Spiderverse x One Piece AU!
A little something that started as an exercise in character design and then I got a little bit into it lmao
I did design the rest of the East Blue Crew but uh... they were kinda ugly/boring, I put more effort into these two because they're the 💕favs💕
Info, kinda. Honestly I don't have a lot thought out its mostly random ideas that mushed together sort of resemble a well put together au, just like everything I do <3
Nami:
- Spider-Woman of her universe, while her design isn't exactly original I really liked using her orange and blue colors. She has the spider logo on her back because she hates spiders and hates looking at them lmao
- In her universe, her best friend Usopp died when she failed to save him (kinda her "Gwen Stacy" but he was just a friend)
- Has electricity powers, her spidey senses are also really in tune with the climate for some reason
- She has a staff (not pictured) she fights with, and also uses the environment to her favor, not the biggest fan of fighting hand to hand because (compared to other Spider-people) shes not as physically strong
- Has a few enemies and nemesis that she fights, Arlong being the most important/strong one
- She's actually quite happy to know other Spider-people, tho she was kinda shocked when she saw Usopp... It was awkard for both of them...
Usopp:
- The first Spider-man in his world, there are some things of his design I would change (mainly the sweatband, I would change the colors), but I'm actually quite happy with his design. Where does his nose go with the mask on? The same place Hobbie's hair goes, idk..
- In his universe, his best friend Nami died, Usopp failing to protect her
- Uncanny precision with his webfluids, also figths using the environment
- Unfortunately isn't a well received Spider-man 😔, gets complaints about destruction of property or how he's "pretty coward for a superhero"
- Really would rather focus on saving civilians from natural disasters, as he's also not as physically strong (compared to other Spider-people), but it seems every weirdo on the block decided they really need to beat this teenager up, so he also has some enemies...
- Super excited about meeting other Spider-people and finally being able to share life experiences with them, and then met Nami, or Spider-Woman Nami and it was awkard and uncomfortable (but they became besties, bittersweet moment)
Extra stuff from the rest of the East Blue Crew:
- Luffy's spiderman name is Spider-King and the rest of the Spidermans where like "I can't decide if that's the best or the worst name I've ever heard...". Well Usopp thinks it's kinda cool, and wishes he had chosen a cooler name for himself, might be too late for a new signature 🤔, Nami and Sanji think it's stupid, Zoro is undecided
- Sanji does not have a spider logo, even tho his name is Spider-man because he hates spiders
- Zoro is the second Spider-man from his universe, the first one being Kuina, she died and he took her place
- Sanji has fire inmunity
- Zoro carries like 5 extra pockets of web fluids cause he takes "longer routes" (he gets lost a lot)
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bonesrbleaching · 23 days
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had the most braindead repetitive conversation/argument with my parents. buzz cuts are too masculine but if you dye a design on it it become effeminate which is bad because then you look weak and if youre weak then society falls apart (all societies ever that have fallen apart for any reason are actually because of feminine men) and we start sacrificing babies. and also all mental illness is invented because only 4 people had anxiety in the 90s and covid was made up so that we would all become gay and trans and then the government can control us better and be joe biden's little sex slaves. and also i need to keep my hair long because my father finds it attractive. what
#lolaa.txt#what do i even tag this with . my mother wouldn't let me leave and i kept asking for sources and she kept saying 'i'm your mother!!!'#'i wouldnt lie to you!'#okay. say that to someone maybe who doesnt know you lie to them all the time.#its tiring going around in circles with her.my father is better because at least he admits when he doesnt have a reason for feeling some wa#also what got me. she said 'do you own research if you want!! but im right!!!'#yeahh not seeing anything about anything you just said. i think you made that up.#i have a theory that my mother secretly hates herself because she believes all women are weak and must serve strong men#and my father has so so much trauma and anxiety that he cant be that strong man#so now she feels like shes betraying her very biology when she has to step up.#and also because i am stronger than her now and my hair is long and far far denser than hers and i have a younger face#that she feels that im wasting my precious femininity that she could be using. does that make sense.#shes so miserable trapped in her idea of what makes a man and a woman what they are. once you stop caring about what makes someone somethin#you dont have to worry about anyone else.#im queer because i dont really feel that connection to biological and social ideas of gender that my parents seem to#never really have#im not gonna theorize 'ohh shed be happier nonbinary' or stuff like that because it is up to you and you alone to define who you are#if you spend your whole life trying to fit a box for the sake of fitting the box#then when would you have any space for self discovery#youve invented personality traits to go along with your box. now you can never ever change or grow as a person. congrats#and you know what? one day she will die. and that will be the end of that.#and i will live and i will probably shave my head a thousand times. and come up with new names#and new ways to be a better person that makes me feel happy#and i will dress like a boy because its all made up anyways. who cares.#and if you care? that much about what im wearing or how i look?#then thats your problem and i wont be responsible to maintain your happiness.#SORRY RANT OVER.#im just so flabbergasted. what a sad life someone can lead poisoned by jealously and reactive rhetoric.#tw homophobia#tw transphobes
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killuaisaprincess · 4 months
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reminder GONKI IS MORE CANON 😤😏 so anytime some kg person tries to send hate at you remember it’s just cuz they’re big mad Gonki more canon eheheh 😘🤭
#IS WHY I WONT LET ANY LOSER GET ME DOWN 😤#I KNOW ITS JUST CUZ THEY ARE BIG MAD THE DIRECTOR CALLED KI WIFE AND KIS VA TAGS STUFF GONKI EHEHEH 😘🥰#Naturally sadly on the west side there’s wayyyy more kg people so I don’t mean alll of them obvi but please#on twitter- I mean x#I am like the sole person in the English gonkillu tag mostly#And these kg fans got big mad when there was dare an artist in there for a while who was popular and used gonki tag#LIKE HOW DARE THEY LOL#Losers got so mad over a tag that has hardly anything in it#SO DONT LET ANY OF THEM DRAG YOU DOWN#Most the time they’re hypocrites and losers#AND I WONT LET ANY OF THEM EVER STOP ME#🤧😤🥰#Honestly they’re free to hate it like I hate kg but the fact they go to bully an artist the moment they dare to use the gonki tag is not#Acceptable#That tag isn’t there for you#Its for us few#ANYWAY ILL ALWAYS STAND MY GROUND FOR THE GONKIS#And trust me this is no lie I’ve been harassed ive seen people leave that were gonkis I have even had friends!#open gonki people tell me they are scared to post#LIKE WHAT YOU WANNA BUT LEAVE US ALONE#And no none of them can use the excuse of “heteronormative” or whatever else they want to get away with bullying#ESP NOT WHEN THEY WILL TURN AROUND AND DO THE SAME TROPES WITH THEIR VER LOL do what you want but do not be a hypocrite to send threats#Its all fiction there’s no need to play purity police god will def let you up into heaven cuz you told me to kill myself for#Having Ki in a dress#NOT LOL! TOO BAD 😤 AND KI IS A PRETTY PRINCESS WHO DESERVES DRESSES 😤 PERIOD#I’m sure there’s been a few rotten gk people I don’t accept them as my kin either but from the few of us I do know#We’re never gone to the kg tags or go to those people’s posts and fics LIKE WHY WOULD I EVEN WANNA SEE STUFF I HATE IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE#AND YES I HAVE TWO FOLLOWERS AND NO I HAVE NO ISSUE SPEAKING OUT ESP WHEN PEOPLE I KNOW GET HARASSED SPECIFICALLY BY A KG PERSON#I WILL GIVE US A PEP TALK 😤 ITS JUST CUZ THEY ARE BIG MAD YOU KEEP DOING YOU GONKI IS CANON 😤
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fleshdyke · 1 year
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ahsgsjaugejwjg
#sh/sui warning for tags#been having a shit day and just not feeling great overall and usually drinking water and eating helps but it hasnt today :/#which means its an Actual Problem this time. like i knew it was an actual problem when i fucking cut AGAIN but idk#idk man. im just so so so scared of my friends hating me#and i know i have to see my partner again bc she is the one and only person that never ever makes me feel safe and unjudged and everything#but idk. as of right now im just not havin a great time.#like its actually so stupid the things i get upset about. there was some motivational speaker at my school today and when we got called down#to go watch the presentation i had to take like five seconds to grab my bag and phone from my desk#and my two friends got up and left together without waiting for me#and i know it wasn’t their intention and they weren’t trying to be mean or anything but man. doesnt make it hurt less yk.#and i saw some post from a guy in my school of him and his friends in the cafeteria and idk why but it made me so sad. it made me think abt#one time my friends said they wanted to walk around at lunch so i was like ok i’ll eat alone that’s fine bc i’m too disabled to walk around#the school. and then someone sent me a pic of them all eating together in the cafeteria. and i know they probably just stopped there for a#second and weren’t purposely ignoring me or anything but man that did not help yk#i want to leave them alone bc they never seem to want to talk to me but im trying to tell myself its just my mind but its so hard to#and i do love my friends and im making them seem a lot worse here than they are but its just. god im so scared.#idk. i dont actually want to die but i wish i could kms like. temporarily.#i know this is bad and manipulative but i just cant shake the want to know what would happen if i did yk. and this is a terrible train of#thought but like i want my friends to realize how scared this makes me and if i have to kms to do that. idk.#ive brought it up to them before and they pretty much told me to eat with someone else and i said i didnt have any other friends and they#kind of just said not my problem. so i dont want to bring it up again bc im mature enough to deal with my own issues and shit#it’s just hard man. i dont know how im supposed to communicate w them bc everything feels like im traumadumping on them and i dont want to#bother them. im trying to convince myself its not an issue and it doesnt actually bother me but i know it does bc i just fucking relapsed#and i had a city council thing in class today and i was the only person that was denied any funding at all and i was trying not to take it#personally and i was doing pretty good but i told my mom about it and she started defending the ppl that refused me anything and then it was#suddenly personal to me for some reason. its stupid and i know that but god that doesnt make it any better#rambles#vent
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antimony-medusa · 9 months
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Okay because I keep seeing these posts, I am just gonna cartwheel in here and say something.
It is not inappropriate to be attracted to real people.
Like, entirely setting aside the question of if you think a fantasy character block men is hot, if you are looking at the photos of a real streamer and you've got hearts in your eyes, I can't overemphasize how normal that is. You're good. Don't worry about it.
These people are funny, and they have good voices, and we watch them be entertaining for hours at a time. This is prime real estate for a little crush. And having a crush is fine, the question is about your behaviour once you have a crush.
I am seeing people thinking that having a crush on a streamer means they're dangerously parasocial, or somehow predatory, or abusive, and that ever breathing a word of it is basically sexual harassment. And like, no. Being attracted to real people is not weird. That's arguably less weird than being attracted to fictional characters. The only question is like, once you know that you want to smooch the real person, how do you then treat that person and the people around you?
Seeing a photo of a famous person and thinking "oh hell yeah I want to hold their hand": this is a celebrity crush. I am aroace and I've spent enough time in some people's streams that I start to go "oh man I wonder if they'd like if if we played D&D together" (medusa-flirting). This has happened to regular people looking at attractive famous people probably since someone in the cave man clan was a particularly good hunter and got praise for it. Thoughts in your head don't hurt people. This is fine.
Seeing clips of a famous person and having sexual thoughts about them: this is still a celebrity crush. Your average boring office worker does this with movie stars. Half the people on the bus are doing this with instagram influencers. Runnning a nice r-rated movie in your head is fine, and doesn't hurt anyone. Thoughts in your head still dont' hurt people. This is still fine.
Collecting photos of a famous person and going GOD they're hot to your friends where the famous person won't see it: still a celebrity crush. There is a standing joke in I don't know how many healthy relationships that your partner gets a certain amount of freebies where you could totally cheat if it's Idris Elba, because it's IDRIS ELBA, that's not cheating that's just sense. You can aknowlege someone's sexiness to your friends, and even joke about it, and you're not being predatory, and you're not being inappropriate. Desire is not a crime. People can publically talk about being attracted to a person, and as long as they're not making it that person's problem, they're fine. Having a "hot people" tag on your blog with careful photos gathered from someone's public instagram where they deliberately posted photos of themselves looking hot? I can't over emphasize how fine this is. If people don't want to see hot people on their dash I guess they can unfollow? But you're literally being totally appropriate still.
Getting a nice private group chat with friends who like to talk abouta famous person and talking about how you'd like to knock him up: Look, what else are group chats as adults for? Are you seeing a trend here? As long as you are keeping your attraction to yourself and not making it other people's problem, as long as you're not bothering the real person with it, as long as you aknowledge to yourself that this is never going to happen and this is just a fun fantasy, this is just like, how attraction works. See pretty person, talk about pretty person, have fun with the fictional imaginings you're having— as long as you're not forcing this imagining on someone else, making it their problem, trying to make it real, as long as you know the difference between fiction and real life, you're fine.
Going up to someone's chat and talking about their dick: This is where you cross the line.
Putting NSFW work in someone's fan art tag. Wearing a shirt with porn on it to a meet and greet. Untagging your fanfic so that people who want to read g-rated works about someone are confronted with e-rated works. Asking one of their friends about their relationship status and if they smell good. This is the bad stuff. Don't do THAT. Keep it away from the real person.
The problem is not the attraction, the problem is forcing the attraction on other people. Like, use your brain. There's a segment of attraction that you can put on main, and then there's a segment that you can put on main but you'd better be sure that the person you're talking about is not going to see it, and then there's a segment you should keep for the group chat, but that's just a very basic sliding scale of "how sexual am I being" correlated with "how private am I being about this". If you want to run a full on porn video in your head starring Wilbur Soot, you're not bothering other people with that, you're not being inappropriate. That becomes inappropriate if you are a) putting that in tags where people who don't want to see the porn video would see it b) talking to Wilbur Soot about it. Those are the boundaries. Wait also c) talking to Wilbur Soot's friends about it, don't do that either.
If the person you're attracted to is an adult famous person, like, people being attracted to them is just part of the landscape. I promise an adult celebrity is not sitting in their room being traumatized because people might be thinking about them romantically or sexually. Putting it up in their faces? Bad. Very bad. I hate it. Don't do it. But I see people freaking out about thoughts. Thoughts aren't real. They do not exist in the real world. You can do what you fuckin' want in your thoughts and you are not hurting people.
Like I know we don't want to be inappropriate with streamers, but that doesn't mean that any sexual or romantic thoughts about them are forbidden, or that mild "GOD he's cute" or picspams on main are hurting people, or that off in a closed group of fellow adult enthusiasts you can't be like "so I think streamer would be submissive if I was domming him" and everyone can be like "oh you'd dom him so well". As long as you're keeping it away from people who are bothered by it, you're fine.
Attraction to real people is normal and how attraction works. You're not hurting people if you think they're cute. You're not hurting people if you want to fuck them, either, as long as you're not making them interact with that desire. This is just a simple matter of keeping the higher-rated material away from the people involved.
Attraction to real people isn't inappropriate. You're fine.
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lookingformoondrop · 5 months
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+ Yandere Andy (for my previous request for suggestive themes with a fem reader and him :33)
Yandere!Andrew Graves x f!reader - Drabble thing
TW: TOXIC ANDY, Yandere themes, obsession, possession, manipulative Andy, suggestive themes, foul language, Andy can't keep his hands to himself, threats & intimidation, Andy calls Reader dumb bunny, not proofread.
♥︎Notes: I think out of all the yandere content ive ever written, this is the most toxic. Please readers, if your irl relationship mirrors any of this behavior, LEAVE THEM. Andy is extremely toxic, and if given the chancs hed lock up his bunny for only him to see. I dont condon any of this behavior, but i support Andrew's rights and wrongs. Hope this meets your expectations <3.♥︎
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When dating Andy, there are certain types of rules you must follow.
They're silent rules, sure, never spoken outloud, but you've been with Andy long enough to know that if you break them... there are consequences.
Rule No. 1 : Never dare speak to another man
You can still remember this rule vividly.
It was sometime in April, and you had practically begged Andy to drive you to the mall for new spring dresses.
When he finally agreed, you both drove to the mall and walked around for an hour, just window shopping all the sweet spring deals.
You found a lovely dress and went to try it on. Unfortunately, you realized the size was too small, so you asked Andy to browse the store for something bigger.
This is when the incident happened...
When you finally finished changing, you walked out of the clothing booth with a couple of other items and one adorable shirt that lacked a price.
You searched for a store employee and spotted a young man.
"Excuse me, but is there any way you can find the price of this shirt? I can't seem to find it," you handed the shirt to the employee, and his cheeks turned a dusted pink
"W- Well sure. I can just ask my co-worker to-"
"Fuck off."
You jumped at the cold voice beside you and noticed a very pissed off Andrew. His hand was suddenly on your hip, squeezing your flesh very aggressively.
"I- I'm sorry, sir, but I was talking to this young lady, not you," the young worker looked nervous.
But Andrew was having none of it, "fuck off before I forcibly make you." His eyes narrowed on the man, as he pushed you against his chest.
The employee retreated for the employee back door, his tail practically in between his legs, leaving you absolutely dumbfounded.
You pushed at Andy's chest, "Andrew what the fuck?! He wasn't doing anything wrong, he was literally just helping me find the price tag for some-"
"Do you like pissing me off? I disappeared for not even 5 minutes, and you're letting men drool over you? "
His grip on your hip got tighter, assuring that it would leave a mark for later.
At a loss of words, Andrew leaned in and whispered into your ear,
"You're making me sad, Y/N... Do you honestly want another man?"
His voice sent shivers down your spine, making that spot between your legs ache, and that chilling feel graze your skin with goosebumps.
"Andrew, I don't want anyone else! Please don't be sad, I'm sorry for misleading you," Your eyes got glossy from the guilt that weighed down on you.
He sighed, disappointed. He gripped your wrist, using the hand that was on your hip to rip the clothes you had out of your hand and onto a random display table.
"You're not a very good girlfriend. But I love you anyway."
He walked towards the exit, caressing your hand while he did.
You quickly leaned that Andrew was not going to tolerate any sort of social interaction with other men, and if you broke this rule, he'd be very, very disappointed in you. Simple as that.
Rule No. 2 : Where you're going, what you're doing, who you're with, and why is all of Andy's business.
A year into your relationship, you decided to take a spontaneous girls trip with your friends to a different state.
You'd only be gone for a couple of days, and since Andrew was always busy working, you figured that he wouldn't mind.
Thinking this, you texted Andrew.
Andy
I'm sorry I haven't texted you. How was your day? **
You
It was good! I'm actually packing right now for a trip. **
Andy
.... **
Andy
What trip? **
You
A girls' trip. I figured since you're busy all the time, I could take this weekend to vacation! **
Andy
.... Where will you be going? **
You
My friends cabin**
Andy
Who will you be going with?**
You
My friends? **
Andy
Whose Cabin? Which friends? Whats their number? How can I contact them? How many nights are you staying? What's the wi-fi situation like? How far away, is it? What's the exact location? Who knows about this trip? When will you be coming back? Will there be any men there? Is it just girls? Will you be changing in front of them? Will you be sleeping separately? Whose car are you taking? How will you get there? By what transportation? Do your friends have boyfriends? Are there any wild animals?**
You
I... Andrew, how could I answer all these questions? I dont... I dont know.**
Andy
Then you shouldn't be going. **
Andy
It's in a location I've never been to nor seen before. So many things can happen to you, my dummy bunny. It may be a cabin, but I know you can't handle being alone for so long. Save me the trouble, Y/N, you're not going. **
Andy
I'm only looking out for you. You're the love of my life. How could i possibly live with myself if something happened to you? Y/N, you're the air that I breathe, the food i consume, the blood i need to pump my heart. Are you trying to run away from me? **
You
No! Andy I swear I'm not! I won't go if it makes you uncomfortable. I just thought... **
Andy
You don't think many things through, dummy. You're such a headache sometimes. **
Andy
So, what's for dinner? I'm hungry. *
Rule No. 3 : You belong to Andy, and only Andy.
"Hey Andy! Guess what I found?!" You walked up to Andy who was lounging on the coach watching some shitty news.
"What's that, Y/N?" He lazily turned his head towards you.
In your hand was an old photograph of you and an old prom date, taken long before you ever met Andrew.
You were cleaning your bedroom and found a couple of old boxes underneath your bed. Once of which, held many old memories of your youth.
"It's all the prom pictures my mom took of me! Don't I look cute?" You leaned your upper body over the coach back and showed Andy the dusty photos.
You expected a snort, a grin, maybe some mockery for your cheesy dress but instead Andrew tensed up his jaw, his eyes narrowing.
He grabbed the photos from your hand and slowly looked through them.
"You are very pretty, Y/N...." his hand squeezed the photos, to the point of crinkling them.
"Andrew, the photos are being!-"
Suddenly Andrew stood up and quickly crossed the distance between you two, letting the photos be dropped to the floor.
You gasped as Andrew smashed his lips against yours.
He grabbed onto your face, pressing his body into yours.
His lips were warm and slightly chapped, the brief smell of mint and cigarettes overpowering your head.
He broke the kiss, a strange hunger dancing in his eyes as he looked at you.
"You're so beautiful... You're so beautiful being mine, and mine alone. Mine, mine, mine, and mine, until the world comes crashing and burning. " He grinned at you, a dark shadow crossing his face.
"Andrew! I- I know im yours, but the photos are being stepped on-" You tried protesting, but instead, you felt Andrew kiss you again, this time going deeper. His hand squeezed your cheeks, attempting to make your jaw open, in a way asking for entrance.
You couldn't help but open your mouth wider, a victim to the rose colored glasses he always placed on you.
Your eyes closed, while Andrews' opened.
He stared at you with a strange intensity.
You, of course, could never hear his thoughts, but if his words were spoken outloud he would scream how much he wanted to rip that prom date to shreds.
Watch him bleed out of your hardwood floors until it stained from that fuckers punishment.
You belonged to HIM.
You were HIS.
And darling, he would go to heaven and drag you back to hell with him if he had to.
He broke the kiss and squeezed you into a hug,
"Promise you wont ever leave me, okay?" Andrew rested his head on your shoulder. You breathed heavily, wiping the saliva from your chin.
You nodded in a daze, the ache between your legs overpowering any kind of hesitancy you had.
Andrew smiled into your neck, reaching his hands under your ass to prop you up around his waist.
"Come on... I want to continue this in the bedroom. I want to see more of you..." He said in just above a whisper.
"Only you..."
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Thank you for the ask (and patience)!<3
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the-karma-cafe · 3 months
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arthur morgan x reader ("thursdays")
(also posted on ao3 under same username)
in which the boys are curious where arthur runs off to every thursday night (ITS FOR SEX)
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song is Moonshadow by Cat Stevens ! spoiler they be fucking :/ i be making them fuck for real (oh no aaaa no arthur dont have sex with me no aaa that would be terrible i would hate that)
Javier’s eyes track Arthur as he slinks away from the campfire, tuning out Sean’s boisterous storytelling. He knows the gunslinger is readying his horse to leave. He also knows he’ll be gone for a couple of hours, returning around one or two in the morning to slump into his bed after everyone has gone to sleep.
How does Javier know?
Surprisingly, Arthur is a creature of strict routine, and he does this song and dance every Thursday night—without fail. 
Javier furrows his brow, unable to quash his curiosity this time. What on Earth could he be going off to do so regularly? He never came back with meat, so he wasn’t hunting. He couldn’t be off robbing, because when he got back, he didn’t drop anything off at the contribution box. Oh, Javier, maybe he was planning to do so later on? Ah, ah, ah! What do we know about Arthur? Ever the routine-man, he donates to the camp box the second he enters camp, no matter what he just got back from. It’s always the first thing he does. Can’t be shoppin’, ‘cause it’s too late for that. Can’t be killin’, ‘cause he comes back clean. 
A cuff round his shoulder roused him from his thoughts. “Javier! Didja hear me?” Sean said, drink emboldening his speech (not that the Irishman needed much encouragement). 
Javier ignored him, glancing over his shoulder. Sure enough, Arthur was on his horse, trotting away from camp, everyone else none-the-wiser.
“Hullloooo??” Sean needled, pushing his side into Javier’s. 
Javier looked over to Lenny and Charles sitting across the campfire from them, and felt a spark of inspiration ignite within him. He leaned forward, beckoning them closer with his hand. They looked confused, but crossed the clearing anyway, kneeling in front of his and Sean’s log. 
“What is it?” Lenny prompted, his voice hushed. He could always trust Lenny to be discreet.
“Yeah!” Sean added, much louder. ...He could’ve guessed. 
He lowered his voice, smirking conspiratorially. “Where’d Arthur go?”
Sean and Lenny frowned, caught off-guard by the question, but Charles inclined his head in understanding. “I didn’t think anyone else noticed.”
“Noticed what??” Sean whined, leaning in closer to Charles. “Don’t be keepin’ secrets, now!”
Charles rolled his eyes, waving his hand to shush Sean. He nodded his head to Javier. “Arthur’s been leaving every Thursday night.”
Sean scrunched his nose. “So what? Art’ur leaves all the time!” Lenny nodded along.
Javier shook his head. “But Thursdays are different. He leaves around 10PM, comes back around 1AM. Why the same amount of time?”
Sean was quiet for a moment (if one could believe it), before jumping up from the log, his beer bottle sloshing in his hand. “Let’s go find out!!” he whispered loudly, grinning from ear to ear.
Javier couldn’t help but mirror his expression. He was hoping he wasn’t the only one this curious about it. He felt a thrum of excitement run through him. He pushed up from the log, Lenny readying to follow him.
“Guys,” Charles interrupted, stopping their walk to the horses. “Arthur’s entitled to his privacy. We should let him have this—whatever it is.” 
He should’ve expected this from ever-noble Charles. Sean began to argue, but Javier cut him off, knowing he wouldn’t win against Charles. “It’s probably nothing.” he retorted, trying not to feel guilty under the other man’s pointed stare. He turned away, making for the horses anyway. “I’m going. You don’t have to.”
“Wouldn’t miss this fer the world!” Sean laughed, immediately tagging along. Javier fought the triumphant grin pulling at his lips. He heard Lenny awkwardly shuffle behind them, some whispered apology to Charles.
He mounted his horse, waiting impatiently for Sean to struggle onto his own. His eyes searched the growth around the camp, hoping to find an indication of where Arthur ran off to. He could track, but Charles was the expert. It would make things much easier to have him with them…
The man in question’s voice came behind him. “I’m only tagging along to make sure you don’t ruin whatever Arthur has going on.” He turned to see Charles mounting Taima, disapproval marring his proud features. 
Javier grinned in spite of it. “Excellent! Vámonos!” he cheered, leading the search brigade with Charles by his side, the other man’s trained eye focused on the ground. Lenny followed behind them with Sean drunkenly pulling up the rear. Charles looked as though he wanted to stop him from coming, but seemed to decide against it, knowing the stubborn man wouldn’t listen to a word he said.
Charles followed Arthur’s trail down the left path from camp, past the trees, past the tracks, until they arrived in Valentine. Javier felt giddy. 
Charles stopped them in front of the saloon, hopping off his horse to hitch her, the rest of them quickly following suit.
“The saloon?” Sean whispered, creeping up the steps to peer through the building’s windows. Lenny followed behind him, and the two poked their noses over the ledge of the window, trying to sneak a glance within. Charles walked over to join them, and would have looked less suspicious if not for the two idiots in front of him crouched like children. 
Javier approached the window opposite them, casually leaning to the side of it to look in. Not that his subtlety helped him, as again, he was across from three grown men cartoonishly trying to peek inside as well. 
He spied a couple of men that looked like Arthur before finally seeing actual Arthur at the bar. He wasn’t hunched over it, like some of the other patrons were, and instead was looking around at the other people in the saloon, as if searching for someone. What could that be about? He wondered.
Before he could think on it further, Sean strolled into the saloon, Lenny in tow. Charles shared a knowing glance with him before following them in. 
Sean beelined for Arthur, and soon they all surrounded him, clapping him on the back.
“You’d go to the saloon without inviting yer favorite drinking buddy?” Sean accused, roughly pushing at the man’s shoulder. 
“My favorite drinking buddy, huh?” Arthur echoed, his voice not reflecting what Javier knew to be embarrassment on his face. Arthur slumped over the bar, tugging the front of his hat further over his face. 
Sean gasped. “Drinkin’ with me’s a treat! Ye should be so lucky!”
Javier nudged him from his other side. “We were wondering where you headed off to all the time. Had we known it was just the saloon we would not have bothered!” he laughed, waving the bartender over. He would buy him a drink to apologize.
“You too, Charles?” Arthur asked, sounding betrayed. 
Charles sighed, apologizing. “I was trying to get them to leave you alone, Arthur.” Javier couldn’t help but think the man didn’t put up too much of a fight. 
“Well,” Arthur cleared his throat. “‘F that’s all, you can all head on back to camp, I’ll be back soon.”
Sean scoffed. “Why d’you want to be rid of us so-”
A guitar strum floated over from the back of the saloon, and he trailed off. Arthur buried his head in his arms, the tips of his ears red. Javier cocked a brow, looking over.
“Miss me, y’all?” a pretty woman at the back of the room called out, guitar in hand. A couple of cheers and whoops came from the crowd, the saloon filled with noise.
The boys grinned knowingly. 
“Not. A goddamn. Word.” Arthur groaned, his voice muffled by his arms. 
Sean barked a laugh, clapping the man on the back. “Ohoho, ye rascal, we shoulda known ye’d try ta keep this beauty ta yerself!” He wolf-whistled towards the performer.
Javier grinned toothily, leaning in to tease Arthur. “You could have told us you were only leaving to see about a girl, Arthur.”
Arthur pushed up from his slump, nursing his whiskey miserably. “Like you would’ve let me hear the end of it.” He grumbled. Javier pushed his extra drink over to the man, giggling like a teenager. Arthur the Stoic, red-faced and shy about a singer. He never thought he’d see the day!
The woman, having finished her introductions while they teased Arthur, began to sing. Javier watched Arthur turn himself slightly to watch her.
Yes, I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
Arthur couldn’t help the dreamy smile that twisted his mouth, watching her. She looked so content, fully in her element up there on Valentine’s tiny lifted stage. The piano man to her right had abandoned his duties to drink at the nearest table.
And if I ever lose my hands
Lose my plow, lose my land
Oh, if I ever lose my hands
Oh iiiii-iiiif, I won't have to work no more
Her southern accent colored the lyrics, guiding the notes up and down as she pleased. The patrons knew this song, and sang along with her every now and then, but none followed the exact way she sang it, allowing him to easily follow her voice amidst the noise.
And if I ever lose my eyes
If my colors all run dry
Yes, if I ever lose my eyes
Oh iiiii-iiiif, I won't have to cry no more
Sean stumbled into the fray, caught in some dance with a couple of other patrons, breaking his trance. Arthur dragged a hand over his face, hoping he didn’t look as foolish as he felt. 
Yes, I’m bein' followed by a moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
Most nights, he would allow himself to indulge in the fantasy. Convince himself she was singin’ for him, that when they locked eyes across the saloon, she had the same look in hers as he did. 
And if I ever lose my legs
I won't moan, and I won't beg
Oh, if I ever lose my legs
Oh iiiii-iiiif, I won't have to walk no more
He downed his drink and reached for Javier’s—anything to give him an excuse for the way he was lookin’ at her. Having them with him just dragged him back to reality: he was just another face in the crowd to her, and even if he did catch her eye, she would just think him old and sour-faced, and leave it at that. 
And if I ever lose my mouth
All my teeth, north and south
Yes, if I ever lose my mouth
Oh iiiii-iiiif, I won't have to talk no more
He took another deep drink, feeling that familiar haze begin to set in on the edge of his vision. 
Did it take long to find me?
I asked the faithful light
Oh, did it take long to find me?
And are you gonna stay the night?
This would be the last time he let himself come here on a Thursday night. He was just torturin’ himself, thinkin’ of things that would never be. Head in the clouds, like Micah would say. Christ, he was glad they didn’t think to bring him along.
I'm bein' followed by a moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
Leapin' and hoppin' on a moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
The drink crept into his heart. If this was his last night here, with her, he might as well fool himself one last time, the drink said. What’s the harm? One last time can’t hurt. It wheedled, and he knew he’d be miserable come morning.
Moonshadow, moonshadow
Moonshadow, moonshadow
He leaned to his right, seeking Javier’s weight to nudge him for another drink (least he could do for ruinin’ his fun), but felt only air. He frowned, glancing around for the others. Sean had dragged Lenny into his drunken dance, Javier was speaking with some well-endowed woman in the corner (who seemed very pleased to have his attention), and Charles… his frown deepened, squinting at the blurry crowd. He couldn’t see Charles. Knowing the women of Valentine, he was likely cornered somewhere, politely refusing their services (although for a man like Charles, perhaps it was free).
Arthur grunted, turning back to his empty glass. Figures that his friends would quickly find company at a place he frequented, and he was left miserable and alone. He plucked his hat off his head, raking his other hand through his hair. He was sure he looked a mess—no wonder he was by himself. 
“Hey, cowboy.” a voice came from his right, startling him from his wallowing. He turned, and felt his heart jump to see his singer leaning against the bar next to him. 
Her eyes were bright, her face flushed. She seemed out of breath from her performance, but pleased, satisfied with how she had done. 
He gaped like a fish. Say somethin’, goddammit!  
She smiled, shifting her eyes to his glass. She pointed at it lazily. “Be a doll and get me what you’re havin’?”
He nodded dumbly, gesturing wordlessly at the bartender. Seconds later, a replica of his drink sat in front of her. She thanked him and brought the glass to her lips. He knew he looked ridiculous, eyes trained on the way her lips parted, the amber liquid gliding into her mouth, but he couldn’t bring himself to look away.
She set the glass back down, giving him a teasing smile. “You mute?”
He shook his head—then inwardly smacked himself for yet another wordless response. “No.” Christ, you can do better than that.
She giggled, and he thought he might die. “What a scintillating conversationalist you are, Mister…” she trailed off, tilting her head. 
“Morgan.” he provided. His mind caught up to the conversation fast enough to ask for her name in turn (he deserved a pat on the back for being so quick-witted). She gave it, and he almost sighed aloud. She had a name she introduced herself with to the crowds, but he suspected it was a stage name, and he had been correct. Her real name was a privilege to finally learn. 
He repeated it back to her, experimentally rolling it on his tongue. She grinned. “Sounds nice when you say it, Mr. Morgan.” 
“Arthur,” he corrected. “‘S just Arthur. For you.” He coughed, turning to order another drink, just to have something, anything , to distract him from the weight of her gaze on him. “I mean, if you want. Morgan’s fine too.”
“Arthur,” she purred. He felt faint. “I like that more.” His next drink arrived and he immediately buried his face in it, unable to meet her eyes. Christ, he was like a teenager. He inwardly scolded himself.
She carried on, oblivious to his inner turmoil. “I see you here a lot, Arthur.” she gestured over her shoulder to the crowd. “First time I seen you bring friends, though.”
So she had seen him in the crowd all those times? He squashed the thought before it ruined him. He laughed, shaking his head. “Bastards invited themselves.” He chanced a glance at her, her attention on the crowd instead of him. He eyed her drink, already half-empty in her hand, before looking up, up, to the curve of her chest, the proud slope of her neck, the strands of hair falling loose from her updo, her lips, her nose, her eyes… he forced himself to look at the crowd instead. “Don’t you have some adorin’ fans to go talk to?”
She turned her head to look at him, but he kept his eyes focused ahead. “I thought I was already doin’ that.” she sidled closer to him, nudging her shoulder against his arm. Warmth radiated off of her. “Unless you’re not one of my adoring fans.”
Arthur felt heat creep up his neck and he shrugged. “Maybe.”
“Maybe?” she echoed, amusement coloring her voice. “I don’t think you’ve missed a single one of my performances, Arthur Morgan.” he felt a shiver run up his spine. “If anyone’s a fan, it’s you.”
He pulled the lip of his hat down over his eyes. “Maybe.” Guilty as charged.
She laughed, and rounded to his front. She flicked up the front of his hat, and his eyes met hers. He stilled, entranced. There seemed to be a glow about her, some hazy halo enveloping her body. How much had he had?  
“You won’t admit it?” What had they been talking about again? He tried not to focus on their difference in height, how easy it would be to scoop her up, his hands so large on her hips… 
“Well?” He flexed his hands, trying to reign himself in. Her face was expectant: eyebrows raised, pretty lips pursed. 
He shook his head. Couldn’t this woman see he couldn’t think straight? 
Apparently that counted as an answer and she scoffed, playfully rolling her eyes. “You embarrassed?”
Yes. Why did she think he was, again? He sighed. “I’m sorry, miss,” he tried her name again, wanting to say it over and over. “I believe I am too drunk for this conversation.”
She grinned in understanding. “Why don’t we talk someplace quieter, make things easier on your poor head, hm?” 
Someplace quieter? His mind echoed, while his body nodded dumbly, stumbling behind her. She took his hand in her own, leading him up the stairs. His eyes were trained intently on their hands, her hand small, warm, in his, her fingertips roughened from guitar strings. 
What was she doin’, touchin’ a man like him? He couldn’t bring himself to pull away, as much as he knew he should. It felt nice, to indulge. The hazy shroud around his vision encroached further inwards, tunneling his view.  
“Here,” she said, so softly he almost didn’t hear. She pushed open a door, leading him inside and shutting it behind them. It was suddenly much quieter. He breathed a sigh of relief, some tension leaving his set shoulders.
“Nicer up here, isn’t it?” she prompted, releasing his hand. He ached at the loss. He dragged his gaze up to watch her dance over to the… bed. He gulped, valiantly fighting off the thoughts that sprang up at the sight of her. 
“Mhm.” He didn’t know what to do with himself. He stood awkwardly where she had left him, staring dumbly at her. What the hell was she thinkin’, bringin’ a man like him up here, alone with her? She could get herself hurt, or worse. He frowned. She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. “I shouldn’ be up here with you.” He shook his head, forcing himself to look at the ground. “Ain’t right. You shouldn’ trust me.” his words slurred, but he hoped she was taking him seriously despite it. 
“Why not?”
He groaned. God, her voice. He buried his head in his hands. “I ain’t. A nice man, miss,” he spoke her name again, and god, hoped she couldn’t hear how he loved to say it.
He felt her hand on his arm. When had she gotten up? She was so warm. He lowered his hands, chancing a look into her eyes, hoping he was strong enough to resist their pull. 
Christ, of course he couldn’t. She looked up at him through her lashes, stepping closer, their bodies almost touching. He breathed in, unable to bring himself to look away this time. She smelled like the alcohol everything smelled like in the saloon, but a sweet undertone ran beneath it. He was reminded of the saccharine scent of canned peaches. 
Her hand smoothed down his arm to his hand, lacing their fingers together. Her other reached up, up, and palmed his cheek, her touch gentle like she was approaching some wild horse. He leaned into it before he could stop himself, his stubble scratching against her skin. 
“How ‘bout,” she started, her voice soft and quiet, “I decide that for myself?”
His eyelids felt heavy, and he felt himself forgetting what she was even responding to. His free hand began to move of its own accord, bumping into her thigh, smoothing up to her hip. He looked down. Just like he had imagined… 
She moved, and his gaze shifted to her face, slowly nearing his. His breath hitched. This was some sweet dream. He would awaken in his tent, frustrated and wanting, would take himself in his hand and relieve himself to the sight of her like this in his mind’s eye. He would wait until next Thursday and slink back to the bar, eager for more. Her lips touched his and he sighed into her mouth, whiskey on his breath. He would stay asleep forever, if he could, lips pushing against hers, nipping at her soft skin, tonguing past it. 
She parted from him, gently, as if to not scare him off. He breathed heavily, eyes lidded, vision tunneled onto her mouth. She started to speak, but he cut her off, pushing hungrily into her, cupping his hand around the back of her neck. He had waited so long, so long. He would take it, even if it wasn’t real. 
She gasped into his mouth and he almost moaned at the sensation. God, what a privilege to finally have her all to himself. To have her in front of him, touching him, kissing him, instead of with her crowd, Arthur by himself at the other end.
Her knees buckled, falling back onto the bed. He huffed, breaking from her. He thrust his hands beneath her thighs, hearing her squeak in surprise. “Easy, girl.” he muttered under his breath, picking her up and tossing her into the pillows at the head of the bed, following soon after. 
He climbed onto the bed above her, and stilled, looking down at her. Her hair had spilled out of its updo, hair piece having been discarded… at some point, perhaps before they had even entered the room? His memory felt hazy. She looked up at him through her lashes, her lips parted, chest heaving. His eyes softened. “Yer beautiful, miss,” he whispered her name. 
Her cheeks flushed prettily. “Thank you, Arthur.” she breathed. She tilted her head up slightly, her eyes slipping down to his lips. 
He reached out, taking a piece of her hair between his fingers, twisting it around. It was soft. Of course it was. It was devastating how perfect she was. “I liked your song, earlier.” he mumbled, focused on her hair. 
“I… I’m glad.” she whispered, her hand winding up his arm, to his neck, to his head, to take off his hat. She placed it down somewhere, and her hand soon wound its way into his hair, her short nails scraping at the back of his head. His eyes slipped closed, humming at the sensation. “I was hoping you would be here, tonight.”
He blinked open his eyes just enough to see her face. “What?” he asked, his voice gruff. 
She averted her gaze, blush deepening. “Been lookin’ forward to seein’ you at my performances.”
He scoffed. Now he knew this was a dream. “Uh huh.” He leaned in, burying his nose in her neck. “You don’t gotta lie t’me.” He turned, placing open-mouthed kisses along any skin he could find. Her breath hitched in his ear. 
“I-I’m not.” she insisted. He hummed, laving across a section of skin before taking it between his teeth, sucking slightly. She held her breath for a second, forcing out her next words. “I been… been dreadin’ the day you stop showin’ up,” she breathed out, “and I’d have missed my chance.” 
He parted from her, pulling back just enough to meet her eyes. They were lidded, but earnest. He felt his heart flutter in his chest. “I counted at least ten other men better-lookin’ and closer in age t’you. Yer tellin’ me not one o’ them caught yer eye?” 
“‘S that really so hard to believe?” she palmed his cheek again, stroking it with her thumb. 
“Yes.” he laughed dryly, but leaned into her hand all the same. 
She brought up her other hand, cupping his face. “Look how sweet you are, baby.” she cooed, bringing his face closer to nuzzle her nose against his. “What a cutie-pie!” she teased.
His eyes softened, tracing the features of her face. He wished he could pause time, sketch her in his journal. He’d just have to memorize how she looked, and try his best to replicate it later. Once he woke up, of course. From this dream.
She connected their lips and he groaned, not expecting the sudden contact again. Her hands moved from his face to wrap around his neck and scratch at his shoulders. It felt like she was sucking him in, how truly he could not pull away. 
He rubbed his hand up her thigh, pushing up her long skirt. Her skin was smooth under his rough hand, moving up to grab at the soft flesh of her ass, squeezing and pulling her up towards him. She arched slightly, and he grabbed his other hand behind her waist to pull her closer, closer still. 
Her breasts brushed against his chest, her nipples stiffening through the thin fabric. He nudged her head to the side with his nose, moving to kiss down her neck. She sighed in his ear, her hands busying themselves with his arms and shoulders. Drink made him sloppy in his movements, his tongue wetting her neck and chest as he made his way down to her breasts. He didn’t bother to tug the fabric down, instead mouthing over her nipple through the fabric, flattening and swirling his tongue into the mound. 
She whimpered, her hand moving up to tug at the hair on the back of his head, her other moving down to tug her shirt down under her tits. He parted from her while she did so, unable to help the smirk twisting his mouth at her desperation. 
“You like that, doll?” he muttered, taking in the sight of her bare breasts, her shirt bunched up underneath them. 
She stuttered out a response, arching up towards his mouth. Seeing her like this sent a surge of confidence through him. She was his. No one else downstairs got to see her like this. Just him. Only him. He brushed his lips against her nipple, watching her try to push into his mouth. 
He smiled against her, and she whined, tugging his hair. “Don’t tease me, Arthur.” she breathed. Fuck. He took it into his mouth, his hand encircling the other, twisting and toying with it. He would give her anything she wanted if it meant she would say his name like that again. 
He dragged his mouth down, not missing the soft moan she gave at the loss, cool air ghosting over her wet nipple. He kissed down her stomach, moving his hands down underneath her thighs, pushing them up, up. 
He bunched her skirt around her, and pulled back. His eyebrows jumped up his forehead in surprise. She wasn’t wearing anything underneath. He looked up at her. 
Her face was reddened with embarrassment, her hands covering her cheeks. 
“Care to explain this?” he teased, running his hands down her thighs, closer, closer. 
She bit her lip. “I…” she looked away. 
He tilted his head, indicating he was waiting. 
“I… did say I was hopin’ to see you tonight, didn’t I?” she laughed breathily. 
His chest rumbled in approval, looking down at her exposed cunt, already wet without him touching it. “All this…” he drawled, glancing up at her, “for me?” 
She nodded, hiding slightly behind her hands. 
“Too kind to me, sweetheart,” he lowered himself, breathing her in. He kissed her thigh, feeling her twitch. “You shouldn’t have…” his breath ghosted between her legs, and she shuddered, anticipation building. He placed a few more open-mouthed kisses inside her thighs, feeling her arch into him, growing desperate. He took pity. 
Gripping her soft thighs in his hands, he licked one long stripe up her slit, gathering her wetness onto his tongue. She gasped, tightening her legs. He forced them open, holding them up. “Be good, princess, or I won’t be good to you.” he admonished, kissing her thigh. 
She shuddered. “Shit, yes, sorry yes, please, I’ll be good, please,” she breathed, trying to wiggle closer to his mouth. 
“Good girl,” he praised, flattening his tongue against her clit, lapping at it softly. She cursed, her hands fisting the bedding. He laved up her slit, once, twice, three times, before closing his lips around her bud, lightly sucking it in and swirling his tongue around it. 
“Fuck, Arthur,” she gasped, and he groaned against her, working his tongue inside of her, circling the entrance before pushing in, lapping up at her walls. He smoothed his hand up her thigh, reaching her clit with the rough pad of his thumb. He pressed gentle circles into it, his tongue spreading into her. She hissed, bucking into his ministrations. 
He pulled away, sliding his thumb down from her clit to her entrance, gently working his way inside. 
“Arthur…” she whined. 
“Yeah?” He teased, mimicking her tone, pushing his thick thumb further inside of her. 
She moaned, pushing herself onto him. “Arthur, please, I need more,” she breathed, meeting his gaze. “I need you .” 
He felt himself throb against his already-strained pants. He cursed under his breath, moving to unbuckle his pants. In his tunnel vision, he didn’t see her move from her position on the bed. 
Her hand came to rest over where his struggled with the buckle. “Let me, baby.” she cooed, moving his hands away. He blinked, letting her move him, watching her smaller hands undo his belt, working his pants down, taking him… oh. She took him out, palming his length. Shit, it looked bigger in her hand. Or maybe he hadn’t been this worked up in awhile. She ghosted her hand up and down, barely fluttering her thumb over the tip. His breath hitched, trying not to buck up into her hand, and failing, miserably. 
She grinned, looking up at him through her lashes. He reached out, stroking her cheek with his hand. “Hey, girl.” he breathed shakily, her hand jerking up suddenly. 
She giggled. “Hey, yourself, handsome.” 
He flushed, suddenly embarrassed to be on the other end. He looked away, only for a moment, before feeling a warm wetness engulf him. He gasped, whipping back to look down at her, half of his length having disappeared into her mouth. “Shit, darlin’,” he cursed, his accent dragging at the words. He bucked up into her lips, smoothing his thumb across her cheek. 
She hummed, the sound sending vibrations into him. “God, sweetheart, you’re bein’ so fuckin’ good to me right now,” he hissed, his hand reaching underneath to cup her jaw, squeezing it and guiding himself further in. 
She opened her mouth wider to take him. “Christ, you’re perfect,” he groaned, feeling her tongue slide up, her hand taking what her mouth couldn’t. 
She pulled off of him, kissing his tip, pumping her hand over the slick she had left. His breath shuddered. She smiled up at him. “You want more?” 
“God, yes.” he pushed her back onto the bed, muscling her onto her stomach, ass in the air. She squeaked in surprise, and he palmed her ass, squeezing it open to get a better look. God, she was practically dripping for him. He bit his lip, groaning. He rubbed himself up her slit, gathering the wetness there, rubbing it onto himself. “All this for me, darlin’?” he whispered, squeezing her hip. 
She wiggled herself back, trying to take him in. “Fuck, Arthur, it is, please, just fuck me already,” she whined, his tip sliding just past where she wanted him. 
“If the lady insists,” he teased, aligning himself with her, before softly, gently, pushing into her. 
She turned her face into the mattress, moaning, grabbing at the covers. “ Jesus, Arthur.” she groaned, her words muffled. 
He pressed in further. Halfway. “Can’t hear you, doll.” It was taking everything in him to go so slowly. 
She turned her head to the side, pushing back to take more of him in. He hissed, his hands twitching on her ass, squeezing her. 
He let out a breath, finally fully seated. He didn’t want to hurt her, he couldn’t. He gyrated against her, desperate for some kind of friction. A whine built in his throat. “Can-” 
Before he could ask, she forcefully pushed back into him, and he cursed, abandoning all hesitation and fucking into her. She cried out his name, arching against him. She was so tight and hot around him, her ass bouncing back against him with every thrust. It was all he could do to keep himself standing, his vision focused solely on where their bodies met. 
“Ar-thur,” she gasped, her breath shuddering, “God, God, you’re so big Arthur, Jesus Christ,” she moaned, her words starting to devolve into sounds with no meaning. 
He kept himself rooted deep within her, barely pulling out before slamming back in again, and again, and again. Her hands grasped for purchase anywhere, everywhere, on the bed, moaning noises that almost sounded like his name, pushing back into him with every thrust. 
Shit. Shit. He screwed his eyes shut. He wasn’t sure he could last much longer. 
“Miss,” he breathed her name. “I, shit, I-” he grabbed her thighs, his fingers bruising in their pressure, forcing her back into him. 
She whined at the pressure, growing limper. 
“Fuck! Fuck,” he yanked himself from her, grabbing at himself and finishing on her back. 
She had collapsed into the bed, giving a small satisfied moan. He breathed heavily, immediately grabbing a towel from the closet and cleaning her off. “S-Sorry, Miss.” he caught his breath, “Should’ve grabbed the towel before doin’ that on you.” He discarded the towel, placing a small kiss on her back, then immediately wondering if that was too much.
“What?” she said, muffled a bit by the covers. She turned, pushing herself up to sit and look at him. She frowned, reaching out and cupping his cheek. “You’ve got nothin’ to apologize for, cowboy.” Her frown twisted to a smile, “I oughta be thankin’ you for such a nice time.” she teased, pinching his cheek.
He suddenly grew bashful, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’ know about all that, but I definitely am thankin’ you.” Her face was flushed, her eyes bright, her lips slightly swollen… he had so many things to remember for his journal. “Best dream I’ve had in awhile,” he mumbled, moving to get under the covers. 
She joined him. “Dream?” she laughed, “You still drunk enough to think you’re dreamin’?”
He shrugged, opening his arms. She shifted into them, laying her head on his chest. “Could be stone cold sober and still think this was a dream.” He pecked her head. “I’ll miss you in the mornin’, girl.” 
She snorted, but snuggled into him anyway.
─ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─
Arthur groaned, the light only hitting his closed eyes, but giving him a headache all the same. His back didn’t hold the ache it usually did, though, laying on this terrible cot. It was the small victories, he guessed.
He thought back to his dream last night, and sighed wistfully. What he would give to have that right now, his cock painfully hard this morning. He forced himself to sit up, rubbing at his eyes. 
A hand reached across his stomach, ghosting against his length. He jumped, looking over to his side. “Well, good morning to you, too.” she yawned, lightly playing with him, a teasing look in her eye. 
He blinked. He squinted.
He rubbed his eyes again.
“Holy shit.”
─ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─
Bonus
The woman placed the guitar against the wall, happily engaged in conversation with some of the patrons closest to her stage. “Excuse me,” Charles butted in, stealing her attention from them. 
She turned to him, confused, but polite. “Yes, sir?”
He smiled kindly. “I’m sorry, Miss, but could you do me a favor?”
“Depends on the favor, don’t it?” she laughed.
He nodded in understanding, and pointed to Arthur, hunched over the bar. “Do you see that miserable man over there?” She looked, and stiffened in recognition. “He has been coming to this saloon every Thursday night, just for you.” he turned to her. 
A blush painted her cheeks. “You’re kiddin’.” she laced her fingers together nervously. “He’s never said anything to me.”
Charles shook his head. “My friend—he is shy with women.” he leaned in conspiratorially, “Especially women he likes.” The woman’s blush deepened, her gaze darting over to Arthur. He straightened up. “All I ask is that you talk to him. I’m afraid my friends and I have ruined his Thursday, and I’m sure that would cheer him up.”
She looked up at him, her eyes dancing. He could tell why Arthur was so taken with her. “He sounds sweet,” she spoke softly. “I would love to.” 
He thanked her, watching her make true on her word and walk over to Arthur. Charles noted his reddened ears and fumbling fingers and smiled. Hopefully, this would make up for it.
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virmillion · 2 years
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tag rants
#we are once again thinking abt the process of coming out and typing it helps bc then i can go back and reread it#and notice the typos i missed in the process but skip that for now#so like. for some reason i have this HUGE urge to come out this summer and i have a few theories#the first and most realistic (hello occam) is that ive known since probably eighth grade that im Not cishet. like ive known i was Something#(read: not like other girls syndrome) but i never knew *what* i was. i didnt know if i was ace or liked girls or was a girl or was nothing#or whatever. i didnt know what i Was. i only knew what i Wasnt (cishet). now i know (like. 98% certainty. theres some shifting but im pretty#solid). anyway i Know now that im A Boy Who Likes Boys. like i KNOW this. ive done the soul searching ive taken the quizzes i know all of it#and historically i never felt the need to come out because it wouldve been pragmatically pointless. hey mom hey dad im not cishet. i dont#know for sure which part of that im not nor do i know what i Am yet. stay tuned for more details to come#like that would be so dumb lol so it was never a huge issue. i figured like ok yknow once i figure it out for myself THEN we can handle the#parent situation. which was no problemo for past lab because that bitch got to procrastinate it. but now hes ME. rude#so now that i know what i am its frustrating because usually its like. like idk but stick with me here. in coding classes youll be provided#test cases and you have to write functions to accomplish a task. then with the given test cases you test ur code and see what works#then you get past the first test case (basic test or w/e) and move on to more comprehensive ones. then once a given function passes all its#relevant test cases u mentally mark the function as done and move on to another. bringing it back around ive run all the test cases on#who i am and who i want to Do. ive completed the function i know how it works ive gone back and reduced the time complexity and all that#so for me. this is usually where i mark it as done and put it in a Finished Junk box and move on. but the prerequisite for entry into that#box is everyone else Also being aware of the function’s completed state#im not gonna bother asking if that makes sense bc if u read this far its on u to get my point. idk#jesus christ im down to like ten tags uh oh. anyway so long story short yes i want to come out this summer i think#which is a HUGE acceleration to my projected timeline of Hey Maybe Graduate College First So You Arent Financially Dependent On The People#Whose Love And Support Youre Most Afraid Of Losing yk#like. yes i could come out in september or so once ive moved back to campus and can have some space. but for some reason (probably the long#winded and unnecessary metaphor made above) i dont know if i can stand going the Whole Summer without telling them. idk#for someone who doesnt know how to shut up i sure do say idk a lot#once again. did i have a point writing this? no. did it help my brain sort through shit a little better? yeah actually#the ideal would be Talking Verbally to someone but like i said im Home and virtual therapy is very difficult to do covertly#hey lab why are u spending half an hour sitting in ur car outside? oh u know just doing therapy lol 🤪🤪🤪#simply chatting about stuff that might get me disowned or kicked our 🤪🤪 u know how i be!!#ive deleted my labhrambles tag to do this one and say. what the fuck. usually i get to 20 tags max how did we hit the Limit hello??
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prettyboykatsuki · 5 months
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✮ tags ; gn!reader, usage of honorfics (-senpai once, -san), submissive ish nanami, blowjobs, anal fingering, 18+
✮ wc ; 1.7k (???????????)
✮ a/n ; i dont know what happened. not even a nanami girl. but. i see a man in need. nanami sorry for what every does to you.
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It's so easy to get Nanami to bent out of shape.
He tries his best, you think. He tries hard, and he's a good guy. You always feel bad being around him and pulling your pranks and antics. You're not like Satoru - he's told you, because you're much more conniving. Unlike Satoru, who Nanami finds dishonest - he thinks you're too direct. Too plain in your admission, your admonishment, your praise.
He deserves a break, for all the tremendous pressure he puts on himself to do well and protect. to make something out of his life. There's some part of him you feel a lot of sympathy for, and another part that sees him for what he is. A man under duress who's practically begging for reprieve. He wants to vacation on a beach somewhere, but he can't.
You think it's natural - inevitable, that Nanami will give into your flirting. You lay it on thick every time he comes by. he's only unaffected in the brief stretch of time where he thinks you're teasing him. Because he's older than you, jaded, easy. When he realizes there's even the slightest bit of sincerity in your words, he suddenly can't look you in the eye.
It's a troublesome affair for him to have feelings for his junior. It's inappropriate, and he can't approach you in the way he likes. The way he likes being controlled and practiced. He's quite the gentleman. Later, you'll sure he'll wine and dine you nicely as a proper thank you. A man like that leaves no good deed unaccounted for.
But for now, you don't really want to let Nanami do anything for you. You've always wanted to do something for him. Break him down. Maybe it's your problem, since a man with that kind of neuroses always turns on the worst in you.
Still. Still. You can see something in him that no one else does, a desire to forget himself. You can give that to him without trying that hard at it, but it does take a lot of convincing.
He's got the handsomest face when he's embarrassed out of his fucking mind. He gets red. You've never seen it before - but his face is lit up. Pink up to his ears.
He's haphazard. Shirt unbuttoned but not off, tie loosened. He took off his pants but couldn't manage his boxers. You've been riling him up all evening, teasing and testing and pushing. When he finally kissed you later on in the evening, an expression close to a plea - you knew you had him where you wanted him.
So you made it to his apartment, kissed in his hallway, pulled him onto the couch and dry-humped like two idiot teenagers. He can't see him to control it after all your meticulous bullying and he looks so much better that way. Loosened up and picked apart.
He's so easy. It's unimaginable for you in some ways, that your cool and collected senior could break apart over something like this. He's normally so reserved, but you've breached some upper limit and now he's like this underneath you.
The muscles of his thighs are tense as you sit patiently between his legs, a hand on his knee with another wrapped around his shaft. you laugh a little at the state, the pre-cum dripping down your fingers and
"Nanami-san," you punctuate the honorifics "You alright up there?"
He lets out a sigh like he's been holding it in all evening. He tries so hard. So hard. You respect it, admire his endless resolve. He chokes down a sound as your hands grip around the base of his cock.
"Yes," He says, only barely masking the thin veil of desperation in his voice. He's almost begging you. You think you're probably awful enough to get him there "I'm fine."
"You sure? You're red in the face. Been a while? You seem like the serial monogamist type. When was the last time you got laid?"
In an act of unbelievable cruelty, you decide the best time to blow him is now. You open your jaw wide, stick your tongue out and let the spit pool onto the tip of his length. He hisses, almost bites a hole in his lip looking down at you in disbelief. His cock throbs painfully in your hand and you giggle - which makes him look down at you ashamed.
You blink innocently, silently imploring him to keep going. He sighs, an arm thrown over his eyes and his hand closed into a hard fist. You close your mouth around the head, minding your teeth. Nanami tastes like skin and salt and musk, but not unpleasant at all. His pre-cum taste clean, just like the rest of him is so prim and perfect. You dip your tongue into his slit, watching him squirm before taking him down even further.
"Could you please—for the love of—"
You slide off your mouth of to talk. You can't help but want to press his buttons.
"Come on, Nanami-san. You can withhold a little bit. You're so sturdy, y'know, more than I thought. Tell me about your sex life."
Nanami can recognize your words for what they are, because he knows you and the games you play with him. He frowns hard, meeting your eyes and closing his own with a sigh.
"I don't remember," Nanami tells you, honest - nearly biting a hole into his lower lip as you massage his balls with your hands, soft as you kiss down his shaft and lave your tongue over the thin skin "It's been a long time. Years."
"That so? You deserve an orgasm, Nanami-senpai. A good one. You really work hard," You punctuate every word with a touch, a squeeze before he shivers himself into a mess. "Every had anything up there?"
His eyes widen in shock and dismay, but not disgust.
"....A very, very long time ago."
"You okay with it?"
"....Well, yes. I guess so."
"Any lube?"
"There's uhm," Nanami stutters, rubs his eyes like he doesn't know where he is "Oil. In the drawer."
"Kay," You say, casually, patting his thigh as you reach over to get it and return to him no problem. He looks at you awestruck and you look back at him with nothing more to offer "Try and relax,"
You warm the oil up in your fingers first before you pull his cock up enough to touch his ass. The rim of muscle flutters as you touch it, slick thumb drawing circles around. He makes a noise you can't identify, followed by one you can. A moan, slight and quiet enough to go undetected. You grin silently as you ease a finger in, a thumb first then your pointer. Nanami breathes through the motion, and you move slow enough to get him to relax.
Once there's one, you go back to blowing him. He loosens up immediately when he feels the warmth of your mouth, hot and slick, suctioned around his cock. You relax your throat taking him deep, opening his ass at the same time.
It's more attention than he's had in a while. There's an unmistakble quality of lust, gargled words and sounds and shuddering. His chest is so flushed in the bare light of apartment he almost glows. You start with one finger and keep your blowing steady - start him easy with stimulation.
You get another, then another - and when your three fingers in, you decide you have some room to be relentless. Ruthless. You curl your fingers and search for his prostate. You know when you've found it because the sound he lets out is debauched.
It's easy - too easy, to get Nanami completely bent out of shape. Getting him this broken this fast almost feels like a trick of light - his dark brown eyes rimmed red and shaking. Such a composed gentlemanly sort moaning a fucking mess.
His strong chest is trembling as it rises up and down trying to catch a breath. You know when you find the spot because he nearly jerks his hips, but shows enough restraint not to do it. Not to fuck up into his throat animalistically like he wants so badly.
A well-trained man he is. You suppose all men can be a little like dogs.
So you reward him by deep-throating him. It takes all of your willpower and expertise but the reaction is more than worth it.
So polite, he doesn't even swear when he breaks underneath your ministrations. Doesn't cry, doesn't even scream when he wants too. His cock shudders and twitches and pulses against the warmth of your mouth, pre-cum streaming into your throat like a broken faucet. But he doesn't let himself cum, doesn't do anything but let you have your way with him.
No, he wants you to have your way with him.
You pull off and he whines. Whines. His voice, thick and deep, so pitched with need you almost want to laugh. You kiss his cock affectionately.
"You can cum when you feel like it. 'Kay?"
He just nods, speechless. Needy. You feel so good and a little sorry for him at the same time. But you're urged by a silent desire to ruin him at his very foundation.
So for the last time, you let your mouth come down on him and fuck him with your fingers. You give it everything, bobbing your hand and timing your rhythms well enough that your wrists hurt. It's a game of balance, but you manage it - because with even the slightest gestures or veritable movements, Nanami folds.
He caves in on himself, breathing ragged and practically drooling. Poor Nanami, you think. It's just so easy to get him this way, and it's fun too.
The words barely get out of his throat before he can warn you, frantically that he's going to cum. But you don't move, pushing forward and barrelling your way towards his orgasm. You can feel it happen on your tongue, cock twitching hard and he unloads deep into your throat.
You don't taste it so it's easy to swallow, and you swallow hard as you milk him making him pull you off in a desperate plea for mercy.
You laugh as you pull away from him, watching as he stares down at you awestruck and a little afraid. You wipe the corners of your mouth and smile.
"You're so sexy, Nanami-san,"
He groans in shame and embarrassment, still red to the tip of his ears.
"Enough out of you."
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soursturniolo · 6 months
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Scare • Matt Sturniolo
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pairing: matt sturniolo/fem!reader
summary: matt and you handle a pregnancy scare.
tags: angst and then fluff, with some humor sprinkled in. happy ending.
tw: light discussion of periods and pregnancy
It feels like my heart stops as I look at the calendar on my phone.
9 days late. And I’m never late.
I noticed this morning that my box of tampons still sat in the cabinet, unopened, in Matt and I’s shared bathroom. I hadn’t thought anything of it, until I opened my calendar to see when my next dentist appointment is.
I swallow dryly as I lock my phone and slip it back into my pocket, dropping down to sit on Matt and I’s bed. All I can think about is that damn calendar. 9 days late. 9 whole days. One or two days is normal I guess, but nine entire days?
I can feel my thoughts spiraling already. Matt and I are safe. I’m on a good birth control and we use condoms often. But even those aren’t foolproof. I do remember forgetting my pill twice this month.
Oh god. What if I’m pregnant? I’m not ready for a kid right now.
Oh god, and Matt. Matt isn’t ready either. With his career and plans with his brothers there’s no way this could even work right now. It would ruin everything. I feel tears of worry and anxiety fill my eyes and begin to drop down my cheeks.
My thoughts just continue to spiral and spiral, until I feel the bed dip next to me. I turn to see Nick, who had stayed behind with me while Matt and Chris went out to pick up some groceries.
“Babe, what’s wrong?” He asks concerned, his arm wrapping around my shoulder, pulling me into a side hug as we sat together.
I open my mouth to speak as my eyes meet his, but all that comes out is a sob. My hand moves to cover my mouth as more sobs follow. Nicks face creases in worry as his other arm wraps around me, pulling me into a hug as he rubs my back soothingly.
“Deep breaths, babe. Whatever it is, it’ll be okay,” he tells me, making me jerk back as I shake my head.
“No it won’t! He’s going to hate me!” I cry.
“If you’re talking about Matt, that kid could never hate you,” Nick tells me, voice calm and reassuring.
“I don’t know, Nick,” I laugh without humor, “this might.”
“Did you cheat?” Nick asks face calm, but apprehensive.
“No! God no,” I immediately answer.
Nick gives a small smile at the quick response.
“Okay, highly doubted it when I asked anyway,” he laughs, “but I don’t know what else could have you so upset thinking he’s going to hate you. You can talk to me, I want to help. What’s wrong?” He asks again.
I sigh. Nicks my best friend. He’s how I met Matt in the first place. I really wanted to just talk to Matt about this first, but with LA traffic and all Matt probably won’t be back for another hour. I don’t think I can survive another hour keeping this all bottled up.
“Nick, it’s bad,” I begin, voice shaken.
“I don’t care how bad, I’m here,” he immediately responds.
I take a deep breath.
“I’m late.” I state.
If this wasn’t so serious, Nicks reaction would have been funny. He stares at me blankly for a moment, before his head cocks to the side a bit in confusion.
“Like, to an appointment?” He asks, lost.
“No, Nick,” I sigh, shaking my head, “my period is late” the last part comes out like a whisper.
Once Nick connects the dots his jaw drops open a bit in surprise, confirming my feelings.
“See! It’s so bad, Nick, this is so bad!” I yell, jumping up from the bed and beginning to nervously pace in front of where Nick sits, still shocked.
“N-no, it’s not bad!” He stutters as he watches me with wide eyes.
I stop pacing and just look at him.
“Really? Not bad? Your jaw dropped open like that because you were trying to catch a fly, then?” I ask sarcastically.
“Listen, I just got confronted with the fact that my best friend and brother fuck, I needed a second,” he defends, hands up.
“Nick, we’ve been dating a year. We dont go to bed and play clash of clans together,” I tell him, making him roll is eyes.
“I know! I know but I also don’t think about it and now we kinda have to think about it and I don’t like it!” Nick exclaims.
“Don’t think about it!” I yell back.
We pause for a minute, staring at each other before we both crack smiles at how ridiculous this has become. We laugh and I return to sitting next to him. Nick wraps his arm around my shoulder again and rests his head against mine.
“So, how late are we talking?” He asks, getting back to the important point.
“9 days,” I whisper.
“Okay. Not horrible. Could be later,” he says, nodding. I nod too. A moment of silence passes as I nervously pick at my nails and Nick stares at the wall, thinking.
“Well, I think we know what we gotta do.” He says, softly.
I turn to him, knowing too.
“Let me call Matt, he should still be at the store with Chris. They can pick up a test,” Nick says. I take another shaky breath before nodding in agreement. I get my phone out and go to Matt’s contact, dialing his number before handing my phone to Nick.
“Hey baby,” Matt’s voice comes through the speaker softly.
“Hey, it’s Nick,” Nick says, earning a confused noise from Matt.
“Nick? Why do you have her phone? Is she okay?” He asks quickly, his concern making me smile softly despite the stressful situation.
“Um,” Nick pauses, which only worries Matt further.
“‘Um’, isn’t a good answer when a guy asks about his girlfriend, Nick,” Matt responds quickly.
“Sorry, she’s okay, but we need you to pick up something else for her while you’re at the store,” Nick says.
“Okay, what?” Matt asks.
Nick looks at me, encouraging me to speak. I take a breath before taking the phone out of Nicks hands, taking it off speaker and holding it to my ear.
“I need a pregnancy test,” I tell him softly.
I cringe as there’s a moment of silence on the other end of the line.
“Okay, I can grab that. Do you need anything else, sweetheart?” He asks softly. I smile again despite the tears I can feel coming again.
“No, that’s it,” I whisper.
“Okay, we’ll be back soon, I love you,” he tells me.
“Love you too” I say back before hanging up.
Nick and I move downstairs, where he puts on a movie for us to distract us while we wait. I let myself be pulled into its predictable plot line as we wait for Matt and Chris to come home.
We both are startled out of our focus on the movie when we hear the front door unlock, followed by it opening to reveal Matt coming in with a mostly empty plastic bag in his hand, while Chris came in carrying the other groceries. Nick moves to help Chris and grabs some of the heavier bags from him, both of them walking to the kitchen while Matt walks over to me.
I stand as he meets me by the couch. He looks surprisingly calm, while meanwhile I feel like my insides are shaking with the anxiety I’m feeling right now. He gives me a small smile before wrapping me in his arms. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding as I relax into his arms, resting my head against his chest. He gives me a gentle squeeze as I feel him press a kiss to my head.
“Let’s head to my room, baby,” he whispers, pulling back from the hug and grabbing my hand to lead me that way. Once in his room, he hands me the bag with the pregnancy test in it before sitting on his bed. Before walking to our bathroom, I pause.
“Matt, I need to know what this will mean,” I tell him.
He gives a small smile and holds his hand out to me. I walk over and grab it. He gives my hand a gentle squeeze, before bringing it up to lips to give it a kiss.
“We’ll do it together. Whatever it is. Sure, I thought kids would be later. But, if now is the time, now is the time. I think I’d be more freaked if this was with some random girl. But with you? I know whatever happens, we will be just fine,” he tells me, before giving the back of my hand another kiss.
“You promise?” I ask.
“I swear,” he tells me.
I smile and nod, before heading to the bathroom. The test is quick and easy, and I’m soon done. I leave the test on the bathroom counter, set my timer for fifteen minutes, and come back out to sit next to Matt on our bed. I rest my head on his shoulder as Matt wraps his arm around me. We just quietly sit, both of us lost in our thoughts as we wait, only to be shaken out of our trances by my phone loudly going off.
I sigh as I stand and walk back to the bathroom to grab the test. I pick it up, careful to not flip it over to show the result, and walk back out to Matt. I stop in front of him. He gives me another reassuring smile as his hands come up to rest on my hips.
“Ready?” I ask, voice cracking.
“Yeah, baby,” he says.
I take a deep breath, knowing this small test in my hand could change everything for the both of us. But I look at Matt, looking up at me with so much warmth and comfort in his eyes, and it’s not so scary anymore.
I flip the test over, both of our eyes moving to see the result.
Negative.
“It’s negative!” I say, laughing. He smiles too, standing and pulling me into a tight hug. We both rock back and forth as we hug, feeling relief. We pull back from the hug and Matt kisses me softly. We both smile into the kiss.
After we part, we walk hand in hand out to the living room where Chris and Nick both sit. They both give us smiles when we walk in.
“So, are we going to be uncles?!” Chris yells, practically bouncing on the couch in excitement.
Matt rolls his eyes, shaking his head while I laugh.
“No, it’s negative. My periods just late, that’s all. It happens sometimes,” I tell them, almost feeling bad when Chris pouts a bit.
We spend the rest of the night laughing and watching movies together, Matt holding me snug in his arms. That night when we go to bed, Matt says something that surprises me.
“Is it bad that I was just a little disappointed?” He asks me softly.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“Well, when you first called and asked for the test I was freaking out on the inside. But then I talked to Chris a bit and the whole drive home I thought about it. And then I thought about a little us, a mix of you and me. And as life changing as a kid right now would be, I got excited,” he says, voice soft and quiet.
I smile, leaning in to press my lips softly against Matt’s.
“We’ll have a little us someday, just not quite yet.” I tell him.
“You promise?” He asks.
“I swear.”
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sanjisboyfie · 5 months
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toji fluff hcs.
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requested, and i had sm fun writing this bc I DO AGREE ANON the toji x male reader tag is just full of smut atp there is never any fluff T.T i hope u enjoy lovely
toji x male reader <3 takes place before canon (mamaguro kinda dont exist sawry)
— the thing is, toji has a very, very thick wall around his heart and he rarely lets anyone in, ever. that's why! in this hc im gonna say that you two met via his job and just worked really well as partners. and then overtime, the two of you just got closer until finally toji makes a move on you.
the two of you were sitting at a restaurant, going over the recent job that you just finished. toji hummed at what you were saying, taking a swig of his beer as he remained eye contact with you.
recently, he's been seeing you in a different light. recently as in the past couple of months. he's just been taking note of everything you've done and how attractive you are when doing them. after he noticed he was thinking these things, he just accepted the fact he had a major crush on you and shrugged it off.
a part of him expected it to happen - how could he not have some sort of romantic feelings for you when you were so witty, strong, and intelligent. he was bound to catch some feelings for you, whether he wanted to or not.
he accepted it really quickly and decided he wanted to make it obvious sooner or later. the fact was he wouldn't know how you felt unless he initiated something.
so as he sat across from you, elbows resting on the table, until he got an idea.
"got somethin'," he said, motioning to his cheek. before you could wipe it off though, he dragged his thumb over your skin and collected the sauce of the food that you were eating onto his digit. he sucked it clean off, maintaining eye contact with you the entire time. "wait, missed a spot, c'mere,"
he leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours in a quick, chaste kiss before smirking at your stunned expression, "got it,"
after that, you obviously questioned him because what the fuck. toji just shrugs, explains how he's liked you for some time and decided to make it known now. he goes on to explain that since you're both adults, you could compromise a mature way of going about your relationship on the off-chance you didn't like him back (he's shitting bricks when he talks about that part though, you just can't tell-)
you return his feelings after getting over the initial shock.
and that was toji's unromantic way of confessing to you, but still, it got the job done and ever since that day the two of you couldn't be happier.
— contrary to popular belief, i think that toji is a big romantic. when he finds the right person, he wants it to be known that he's interested in them, loyal, and a devoted lover. in his own ways, he gives a lot of romantic attention to you and the time you spend together. even if he's dead broke, he'll find a way to make ends meet in making your relationship feel as special as it is to him.
"c'mon, baby," he goads you into grabbing his hand, rolling his eyes when you shoot him a look. "let's go, the reservation isn't gonna be waiting for anyone else but us,"
"yeah, how did you do this though? toji, this place is so expensive, are you sur-"
he kisses you to shut you up, hand caressing your cheek as he speaks to you in a low voice, "i got it all handled, don't worry about it," that translates to you = i pulled a couple of strings by threatening the boss of this place to let us eat here for free. but you couldn't will yourself to care because it was the thought that counts! plus, he went through all that effort just to secure you two a romantic evening together.
so you ruffled his messy dark locks and allowed him to guide you inside the lavish restaurant. he smirked in content, kissing the top of your head before securing you two your promised table.
on your anniversary, he showers you in so much love and affection it's insane. he doesn't have the money to bring about the most lavish celebration, unfortunately, but he does make up for it by being extra doting.
"love you so much," is the first thing he mumbles into your skin. it takes you a second to register why he was being so lovey-dovey, but when you remember it was because the calendar marks two years of officially being together, your heart warms.
toji has a good memory, remembers all the important dates and what you like and don't like. he's got it all stores in his memory under the "everything about [name]" folder there, that has other information such as your food preferences, what you like to wear, what you enjoy watching on TV, etc.
his hands run up and down your sides, pinching your nipple to get you awake and laughing when you smack him with the pillow. "sorry, just wanted to get you up so we don't waste our entire day in bed!"
"what if i wanted to just be in bed with you?" you asked, rubbing your chest with an annoyed look on your face.
"sorry, baby boy, but no can do," toji says, peppering kisses on your face, "got the whole day planned out in my head," you ignore his loving kisses that start trailing to you neck.
"mhm and what's that?"
"it's a surprise, don't ruin it," he warns you in an oddly serious tone, "want to make today special, let me make it special, boy,"
you laugh at his seemingly annoyed tone, but let him have his moment - not pressing for anymore answers.
— not the biggest on public affection, but doesn't hide the fact that he's yours and you're his. always has his arms around your shoulders or waist, sometimes pecks your cheek. but that's as far as it goes with pda. verbally, on the other hand, he's always mentioning you. even in brief interactions with other people, he's slipping mentions of you into conversation with such ease and smoothness.
"will that be all today?" the barista asks, eyeing toji up and down. and he's not a stupid guy, he notices it easily.
so to assert himself, he clears his throat and looks over the menu, "nah, actually, let me get a cinnamon bun for my boyfriend," he says, pulling out his wallet and taking out some cash, "he's been wanting somethin' sweet for a while, so i guess i can treat him to this," he comments, looking back at you with a smile. you were already seated at the table as he ordered, offering him a wave before looking back out the window.
the barista is obviously dejected when he mentions you, but he's nothing but prideful and satisfied. serves her right.
"didn't [name] already tell you we won't be taking the job? we got our entire week already planned out, we can't fit in another mission," toji said over the phone. it was one of the rare instances he was turning down the opportunity to make money, but he didn't feel bad or guilty about it.
you and him had a whole week planned together, it's been in the calendar for months now and he wasn't going to ruin the rare one-on-one time he could have with you by being greedy with some extra cash.
in the past, he might've. but you changed him, in a good way. and he wasn't going to make it seem like he valued cash over you because he definitely didn't.
"i wasn't aware that [name] spoke for the both of you? y'know, if you take him out of the equation, toji, you actually make more money-"
toji almost growled, "he fucking said no, that means i said no, too. don't be an asshole right now or i might really get pissed. from now on, whatever my man says think about it as if he's speaking on behalf of both of us. same goes for me. so listen closely when i say this, cause i'm sure he'd say the same thing to you right now: fuck off!"
he hangs up the phone and tosses it onto the table, rubbing his forehead in annoyance.
"everything alright, babe? you were yelling?" you shout from your shared bedroom and toji visibly relaxes after hearing your voice.
"nah, everythin's alright, doll, don't worry about it," he calls back, kicking his feet up onto the table and spreading his arms against the couch cushions, "hurry your ass down here, though, or else i'm starting without you!"
— huge believer in cuddling, loves, loves just holding you in his arms. it's the one time he really feels as if his stress just washes away. he's a big guy, so he usually just ends up completely blanketing over your own body. but usually, he settles for just being the big spoon and staying satisfied like that. sometimes, though, he will want to just have you completely laid out on top of him as you act as some sort of weighted blanket. that's if he's really, really stressed and just needs to be reminded that you're there for him.
his hands rest on your hips as he's laid flat on his back, holding you in place on top of him. you have been struggling to get comfortable for the past five minutes and he had to bite his tongue from saying a snarky comment to you.
"fuck, toji, it's like i'm sleeping on a rock," you complain, pushing yourself up from his torso and glaring at him, "can't i just sleep next to you like a normal person,"
he keeps his eyes shut, not bothering to wake himself from his semi-sleepy state, "[name], just stay still for a second and you'll eventually get sleepy,"
"easy for you to say when you're on the comfort of the mattress,"
"don't you say my boobs make for good pillows or something," he groans, finally cracking one eye open to weakly glare at you, "just use them as your pillows and count fucking sheep,"
"but your-"
"shh, you big baby, i just need this for tonight," he promptly shuts you up but pushing his finger on your lips. in any other instance, that would've just pissed you off even more, but seeing how genuinely tired and needy he was, you let it slide. just this once.
you settled back on his chest, running your fingers up and down his sides to give some sort of comfort.
"love you, toji," you breathe out, barely loud enough for him to hear.
but he does, and he squeezes your sides to show that he did, kissing the top of your head and whispering it back before he's lulled to his own slumber.
— always thinking about you. he's only concerned with you. every single other person in the world can fuck themselves, he just cares about you and wants to make sure you're safe.
"where's [name]?" were the first words he asked their employer, looking around the office space in search of your h/c hair.
"he just went to get himself some water-" as toji is informed of that, he's standing up out of the seat he was in and is going to leave in search of you. "he should be back in a couple short moments,"
"hm, don't care, i'm going to look for him and then we can start this meeting," toji said, not giving another glance to the guy that was going to give the both of you a job to finish.
oddly enough, the meeting was held in a corporate looking building and toji was concerned on your whereabouts. what if these assholes had some fucked up trick up their sleeve and were going to use you as leverage to get to him? toji wouldn't put it past them, he's messed with more than a couple powerful folks back in his day.
it could bite him in the ass someday and he really didn't want to risk that chance affecting you.
"toji? what are you doing here?" you ask, coming towards him with two paper cups of water in your hands.
"looking for you, babe," he easily responds, looking at the water in interest, "where'd that come from?"
"they had pitchers in their breakroom and i decided-"
"could have poision in them," toji said off handedly, looking at the contents and his face screwing up in distaste, "hold off on drinking it for now, these guys can be unpredictable sometimes,"
taking his warnings seriously, you don't sip from the cup at all and walk back with him to the meeting room. his hand rests on your waist protectively as the two of you walk through the halls, glaring at anyone who stares for a bit too long.
like a personal guard dog, toji is always standing at attention and assuming the worst of people. but don't worry, he doesn't mind. if it means it keeps you safe and in his arms, he'll be as paranoid as one can get and not have an issue with that at all.
— at the end of the day, toji doesn't listen to anyone, but you. it's funny how obediant you can get this absolute unit of man to act. he tries not to make it so obvious, but when he's hanging off of every word you say and acting at your beck and call, it's already obvious to everyone around you where his priorities are at.
"toji, don't touch that - the sign says not to touch,"
"if i wanna touch it, i will," toji says with a shrug and smirk. but then he notices the warning look you give him as his fingers inch closer to the display. he clicks his tongue in annoyance, dropping his hand to his side as he muttering under his breath, "didn't wanna even touch it, anyway, tch,"
or another time when he's giving the waiter an earful for not remembering something in your order. he thinks he's doing you a favor by speaking up for you, but in reality, you just didn't want to make the waiter's life harder than it already is.
"he asked specifically for you guys to put it on the side since he doesn't lik-"
"baby, it's fine, just drop it," you sigh, rubbing your forehead with a tired look in your eyes. he's about to protest, a scowl on his face as he thinks about the waiter incompentence. but with one look from you and a calm, "toji, enough," reaching his ears, he's standing down and shutting up.
the waiter shoots you a thankful look before running off to the kitchen with your plate of food, going off to correct his mistakes.
"couldn't hurt you to speak more nicely to people," you say, grabbing his hand across the table and shooting him a look. he scoffs, taking your hand in his and calming himself down using your touch.
toji only ever listens to one person in his life and it's you. you're just really lucky he loves you so much because if it was any other person, he'd be doing their head in. he sighs, thinking of the affects you've had on him and his own steel, hard heart.
he can't help but be thankful. he kisses the back of your hand silently, squeezing it in his hold once more before shooting you a small, barely noticeable smile.
"if that fuck ass even thinks about looking at you with those puppy dog eyes of his one more time, though, i can't promise i won't nail him right in the face," and there's your familiar, stubborn toji back again, easily threatening a poor guy that's just doing his job.
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borzoilover69 · 2 months
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I have a headcanon on how these guys style themselves postgame and you WILL hear me out.
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Kanaya, Roxy, and Jade are self explanatory. They know how they want to present themselves. They know how to go forward with that. They’ve got colour combos and layering and fashion choices suited to their particular style IN THE BAG. Loud, prominent, they know whats up.
Jake, Calliope, and Jane get nudged into giving a fuck about fashion by anyone named above, or rather their own desire to dress up…Jake moreso because as a celebrity he gives too much of a fuck about his image to be anything less. Callie of course is affectionate enough with jade and roxy that they teach her how to style and i think she would like lolita and more daintier feminine stuff than roxy, but she does tend to sometimes switch over to suits. Jane is pure butch energy she dresses like a guy but as a girl with fashion sense. Like strict lesbian style. I dont know how else to fucking put it she would dress like how a butch lesbian would.
Jane and Jake stylewise would be similiar to some retro callback summer movie where everyones on a roadtrip in a yellow van or something except jake is more prone to extravagancy because he gives more of a fuck. Also one of them is wearing dresses and its NOT Jane.
Dirk and Rose.. fashion disasters. Dirk doesnt know fashion weight for a while and tries too hard id even suspect that he would try and mimic daves fashion style for a while until john or someone else blatantly calls him out in an offhand comment and jake and the rest of his friends start getting on his fucking case about being so bland with his fashion takes (all primaries, little to no patterns, basic, no layering.) that he caves and starts taking it like a personal challenge to style well.
At some point he has a revelation and realises he can get piercings and starts leaning into that and punk / gothish fashion. Black with complimentary colours recommended by friends.
Rose is sort of a fashion trainwreck like for all of kanayas nudging she doesnt really give a fuck and kanaya starts dictating her outfits and then of course she also gets the "someone makes an offhand comment that makes them mald really hard about it and go into a snooty onesided competition to prove they GET IT actually and that you were TOTALLY wrong about them not GETTING IT." Its the only way Dirk and Rose start caring.
Terezi and John get nudged around by their respective compadres about fashion sense and style, but they generally dont give a damn and have their own thing going for them. Theyve got their own vibe and style that feels well on them and especially terezi wise i think she would lean into the fashion disaster for fun. As long as the colours taste well together, who gives a damn about layering etc etc. throw in some crocs with a suit. An oversized shirt with a tapered skirt. Who cares. John is more tried and true but he styles out ENOUGH so he doesnt end up in the last (deorgatory) category.
Dave and Karkat are the real stubborn contendors of the friendgroup fashionwise. Baggy on baggy outfitwear. WILL get on your case if you point out had it not been for their respective colour choices they basically dress the exact same. Same mix of cargo pants, sweatpants, tracksuit pants, hoodies, and tshirts to keep them going for the lifetime. There js nothing else. Whats layering. Accessories? Well except for a watch hard pass. Patterned clothing? No way. Basic colours ONLY. Maybe Dave would dig long shorts ive always seen him as a longshorts kind of guy but its never anything noteworthy. Type of guys to choose what theyre wearing with their eyes closed thats how basic their closet is.
Anyways thats my style and fashion thoughts. Let me know what you think. Discuss and all that. Also tag yourself on which one youre closest to stylewise. Im jake. Obviously.
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Note
YUA 🥹 (i assume since i see the name in your tags)
i wanted to share that today was so achieving, i ffffuucking earned a free college scholarship cause i was being unknowingly observed by a dean of a school i wasn't in but only performing and assisting my mother (teacher as well) for a recital with only 2hrs of sleep, (i also read your top posts repeatedly earlier after sifting through stories 🤭)
fuck i just- perhaps want something related to my life long achievement that i never thought i would get, and how about a mean!scara?
a mean, dismissive, cold scaramouche that needs heavy decoding, and seconds before reader falters into sadness, almost leaving, scara mutters something that quickens her heartrate, grabbing her fingers with his instead of her wrist or hand, showing a certain side, and she was met with sudden comforting affectionate gestures, cheek kisses, trailing lower and closer to the corner of her lips, praising her affectionately and lovingly in that moment, before fucking each others mouths for a good while, mean!scara uncharacteristically praising reader genuinely with each gasp of her because- he understood her struggles, her hardwork, and he was just- drunk in an unspoken admiration towards her (cough ME🥹) AND- i dont know what else to put, but i also want to be bred roughly by him- fucking each other like it was the end of the world, and i want reader to cry in happiness and from his rough manhandling during their breeding session — because she just- she's just so genuinely drunken and intoxicated in love, happiness and lust
as if his cum was creating their own future as well
- hiraeth 🤭
MEAN SCARA MEAN SCARA MEAN SCARA
You were breaking down, tired and exhausted that you had tears in your eyes. You were so fucking tired, it was exhausting. You've worked so hard but come so far, you've been exhausting yourself just to get into that damn school, but you never got into it after..how many tries?!
During your crying session, someone comes in and sees you in a state that he's never seen before. Scaramouche kneeled down to where you were, and pulled you into an embrace, and resting your head on his chest.
You immediately broke down in more tears, probably because of him comforting you. You were extremely exhausted, and yet you don't know why Scaramouche was now comforting you. It was out of character for him to do so, but you weren't complaining.
He took your crying face in his hands, then kissing the tears away, peppering kisses all over your face until he got to your lips, placing a gentle peck on them.
"Stop crying you idiot, you've been working hard. It's hard but that's how it is. You've done a lot, and it's admirable. I can see that you've worked hard, to the point where you completely exhausted yourself. I think it's time for you to take a break and unwind.."
Meaning by unwinding, he meant by fucking you til tears are glistening from your eyes, thrusting his cock into your dripping hole while whispering and murmuring sweet praises into your ears, telling of how good you're taking him and how hard you're working. This wasnt your mean and arrogant Scara, this was a completely different person. He was being so sweet with you, peppering kisses all over your body, giving a gentle peck to your lips and worshipping your body as if you were his everything (which you are.)
He would wipe your tears, and kiss them away, the tip of his cock would always kiss your womb with every hard and deep thrust he make. You would claw at his back, whining and crying over how "it's too much" or how "it's too good."
Scaramouche would just snicker and just continue to pound into you like there was no tomorrow. Honestly, he finds your constant whining and crying adorable. He would often smash his lips against yours, silencing your whines and cries while he releases hot ropes of cum inside of you, painting your warm gummy walls white as you spasm around him.
"I wonder how would you look with a bump..pregnant with my child. You love that do you? Being all stuffed and full with my seeds..I bet you want to be knocked up, don't you?"
Tears were running down your cheeks, nodding frantically and desperately begging for him to fill you up with his cum. He immediately obliges, stuffing his cock inside of you once again, cum leaking out of your cunt as he thrusts into you mercilessly.
The thought of you being knocked up, pregnant with his child, made him harder. He loves when your gummy walls clench and spasm around him, he would occasionally rub your clit, making you squirt on his abdomen right on the spot. You don't even damn know how long you guys have been at this, but you don't care.
Scaramouche turned you over to your stomach, putting you on all fours. He soon grabbed your hips, pumping his cock right into you once again, giving hard and deep thrust that makes you quiver and tremble under him. Damn right you were gonna cum right on the spot again.
Who knows how long you guys been at this. You came so many times that you've lost count, you were reduced into a dumb cockdrunk bitch for Scara to stuff his cum in, and you didn't mind. He would always give the best after cares after anyway <33
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marymary-diva17 · 6 months
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Broken vows (2)
Jake x reader + neteyam/ sully kids/ neytiri
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Since the day neteyam had been shot my the recoms while saving his siblings and spider, so much had changed in your life. You are still thankful that your son is still alive and well, but your relationship with his father Jake still hadn't changed. It seems like you are staying turn to your words and keeping your distance from Jake and neytiri. Making sure to be civil towards them when the kids and everyone else was around, but there was never going back to what your relationship was like in the past.
Y/n " these sample will be perfect"
???? " mama"you soon heard someone calling for you making you turn around to see neteyam making his way towards you.
y/n " hello my son"
neteyam " hey mama I came to see you and see how everything going"
y/n " well I'm happy you are her my boy ... so where are your siblings" neteyam smiled and soon enough his siblings and spider had appeared, you knew they were all here today.
tuk " hey mama"
y/n " hey little one"
kiri " neyteyam said he was going to come see you today and we tagged along as well"
spider “ they came by the home to look for you but it told them, you were out and so we came to see you all together”
y/n " well I'm happy all my kids are here I was about to hand back to the base once everything was backed away"
lo'ak " here lets us help you"
y/n " thank you kids" The kids were helping your collect the rest of your sample and some other plants as well, to take home with you so you can study them later.
y/n " teyam be careful just because I said you were in the clear and good to move, doesn’t mean you can move around so fast”
neteyam “ yes mama”
tsireya “ hello everyone”
Loak “ hey you guys made it mama we asked tsireya and her brothers, if they wish to come with us”
y/n “ well it's good to have them”
Rotxo “ can we help please”
y/n “ sure one of you can help Tuk carry the stuff”
Tuk “ I got to mama in a big girl now”
y/n “ tuk even big kids and adults have to ask for help”
Rotox “Here Tuk I will take some of the stuff, and you can still carry the rest.”
Tuk “Okay” Tuk had allowed Rotxo to help her carry some of the stuff while Aonung and Tsireya had helped her older siblings and spider . Soon all the kids follwoed you back to the base, the kids had palced everything down outside.
aonung " so will more humans be coming here to stay with you and spider"
y/n " well I don't have a answer for that yet norm might come to stay her official, but he might stay in the forest a bit longer if other humans come I don't know yet"
aonung " wow I can't wait to see what else these sky people have"
y/n " you will be amazed young man"
tsireya " so you were a healer before you came here"
y/n " yes that was my life I was a healer back at home that was one of many moments, I had meant Jake and I might be one of the many ways I had ....yes I was a healer"
tuk " mama what was it like being a healer when you were younger"
y/n " there were good and sad moments little one but that happenes, when you heal the sick and injured"
kiri " well I'm happy you and spider are staying here it will be boring without any of you"
y/n " well I have stayed to help with you kids and Jake if anything bad happens, and to keep in contact with everyone else back at home"
spider " she even allowed me to have my own room as well"
y/n " yes a room he will make sure to maintain when under my watch"
spider " yes mom ... you dont mind me calling you mom"
y/n " no I don't mind at all spider I have raised you since you were young, along with my son and there other kids all of you have become my kids"
neteyam " hey it will be cool to have another brother and someone here with mom when we are at home"
tuk " yeah spider our big brother official now"
????? " y/n" you and the kids had heard someone speak and that was tsu'tey he saw the children and looked at them.
y/n " tsu'tey welcome"
tsu'tey " hello I came to bring you some of the items your asked for"
y/n " thank you I can show you where to put them" you soon walked off with tsu'tey leaving the kids alone. many thoughts were running through their heads, about this interaction between you and tsu'tey. The kids had watched you and tsu'tey talk and laugh as it seem like you two had a special bond.
later that night
neteyam " mom thank you for allow us to stay for dinner"
y/n " it was good to have you all here for dinner"
kiri " dinner was wonder I love your grilled fish and vegetables"
spider " yes they are amazing you always had an amazing cooking talent"
aonung " thank you for allow us to stay as well"
rotxo " yes thank you"
y/n " it was good to have my kids friends over for dinner"
neteyam " umm mom there is something I been wishing to ask you"
y/n " sure my son ask away"
neteyam " umm mom have you ever thought about dating again or finding a new mate or husband" you had looked at the kdis they were all looking at you.
neteyam " I knew that was a stupid question"
y/n " no it a good question my son ... yes for some time I have been think about open a new page on my love life"
tuk " a love life with who mama"
y/n " I don't know yet"
tsireya " we have some wonderful warriors and members here who will be perfect for you"
y/n " oh"
kiri " we also know some of as well"
tuk " yes like uncle norm he will be good"
lo'ak " not him silly"
y/n " norm has loved someone before and still love her, I rather not make him give her up yet"
tuk " oh okay"
spider " well some of the scientists males have said you are beautiful and have taking a liking to you ... but they didn't know it was appropriate with your relationship with Jake"
y/n " I and Jake will be friends for now on and be parents to you kids"
neteyam " then what about tsu'tey mom"
y/n " I and Tsu'tey are friends."
neteyam "Mama, don't lie I have seen the way you two look at each other and act around one other"
lo'ak "Uncle Tsu'tey acts like your husband heck, he might have been a better husband towards you than Dad."
y/n " kids ....."
Kiri "Mama, we've seen you be alone and turn down dates and offers of romance to take care of us or help around the clan. Most of it was thanked, and others not."
Spider "You have given it you all here you deserve some happiness"
y/n " kids it good to see you all care but I love someone once and he broken my heart, and left me for another without saying anything else"
neteyam " we know mama"
y/n " you know who told you"
spider " we ear dropped our norm and other conversation then of them have been happy with Jake lately, and either have mo'at as well"
tsireya " even our parents seem disgust by their actions as well"
y/n " children I wish to never drag any of you into this mess"
neteyam " mama we love you and we will do anything for you, mama I want you to be happy and if that with tsu'tey I will be happy for you as well"
y/n " okay I will give love a chance" the kids smiled it seem like it worked, the children left the night saying goodnight to you and spider. You had taken the kids words to heart and agreed to allow yourself to fall in love again, maybe finding love again won't be that bad. You had started soon get close to Tsu’tey. He would even be seen leaving your home during dusk times, start many gossip and rumors in the clan drawing the attention of many. The kids were soon help to learn you and Tsu’tey were official dating, so were all your friends as well one of them stating your official moved on from Jake sully and will find a proper and good husband this time around. You are happy in your relationship with Tsu’tey and with the family and friends you have here, giving up one your past romance and giving love a chance again. Now it was time to see where your life will lead now and how much happiness and sorrow will come as well.
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soothinglee · 2 months
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now it’s different; i am the one inlove...
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jeongin x reader | 3.3k✔︎ | mainly his point of view.
my notes⎯ whew. this is the longest fic i've ever posted and i can't lie and say it wasn't a pain. originally i got this idea from listening to "morning dew" like 100 times and thought it would be perfect to write something for i.n.
warnings⎯ somewhat angsty, poor writing, some cursing, doubts, and humorous dialogue (so sorry if you dont find me funny).
genre⎯ eventual friends to lover, angst.
songs⎯ morning dew; xavier wulf | a new kind of love; frou frou
⎯catalog for skz✰ | requests r open
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12.03.23 | 4:04 p.m;
it had been ten minutes since you left jeongins’ side to aid seungmin in teasing changbin. the frigid weather turning your breaths to smoky clouds as you laugh at one another.
jeongin rests in his spot on the park bench, if you ask, he’ll simply say he cannot join in on the fun due to the stiffness in his joints, and not the fact that an unwavering feeling of jealousy is creeping through his bones like wildfire.
he can’t help but narrow his eyes at the skinship you give felix, reaching up to brush the snowflakes out of his bangs, threading your fingers in his when you spot a squirrel resting in a tree; dragging him towards the spot before the rodent runs off.
jeongin hates physical touch with a burning passion. there would never not be a time where he didn’t push one of his hyungs off of him. he didn’t like when bangchan would suprise back hug him, or when hyunjin would randomly sit in his lap and pester him.
yet when he looks at the way you interact with the other members, he cant help but wonder what it would feel like with his hands in yours. running around the white colored park, throwing snow at eachothers faces, trying not to slip on the ice while playing tag with everyone else.
you weren't shy to affection, jeongin knew that for a fact. so there wasn't any real reason for him to be scared to go up to you and initiate a hug or a hand hold. but the overwhelming feeling he's been trying to hide for the last two years is holding him back.
yang jeongin has the biggest crush on you. he just wont admit it.
all the other members can see it clear as day, they don't hesitate to tease him about it when you aren't around; sometimes they do it infront of you but they are somewhat discreet about it.
"you're staring again." a muffle voice comments beside him. jeongin flinches at the sudden sound, he had been sitting by himself silently for a little longer than he had expected. "keep it up and she'll think you're a creep."
jeongin raises up his fist towards hyunjins face to which the man backs away quickly, "shut it." he threatens, he turns his attention back towards you, watching you get a piggyback ride through the snow by bangchan. he holds back a scoff.
hyunjin shrugs, readjusting his scarf around his face. the tip of his nose peeks through the fabric, it's color matches his ears; dusted a cherry red, "i'm not lying. even just watching you watch her is making me uncomfortable," he shivers to further his point, jeongin lightly shoves him. "i don't know why you wont just tell her."
jeongin feels his blood run cold contrast to the heat in his cheeks. he gives a quick glance towards hyunjin who watches him expectantly. "i don't know what you're talking about." he mumbles, adjusting his body on the wooden bench. he's been sitting for so long that his butt is growing numb.
"i.n-ah!"
"what?" he says, "i don't have any feelings for her, i'm only just looking. it's not illegal or did the laws suddenly change?"
jeongin swivels his head exasperatedly to look at hyunjin only to find him staring back with a wide grin. jeongin raises an eyebrow.
after a moment of staring, hyunjin lightly murmurs, "i never said anything about having a crush on her." his grin widens.
in that moment panic flushes through jeongins body and he's quick to clamp a hand over hyunjins mouth. "shut up. shut up dude."
"YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON Y/N." hyunjins voice comes out muffled underneath jeongins glove but he can still hear it very clearly. he just hopes no one else (more specifically you) hears it aswell.
"you liar, i do not! hyung, please stop screaming, i swear-!"
"you guys alright?" a third voice pipes up. both of them turn and see you standing a couple inches away, bare hands shoved in pockets looking like a swaddled marshmallow. you were covered head to toe in snow, proof of the snowball fight you had with felix lingered on your clothing. the apples of your cheeks moved with every sniff you took and jeongin couldn't help but mentally compare you to a bunny.
he immediately released hyunjin, who stayed in his backed up postion grinning at him. "yeah." he cringes at the way his voice cracked out of nerves, or the way his palms started to sweat despite the cold.
"are you sure?" you question, looking at hyunjin then back at him, "i thought i heard a scream."
"no-"
"-you did." hyunjin interjects, slapping a hand on jeongins back. his body jostles forward at the contact. "but it was nothing, right i.n? just some light teasing."
jeongin grunts through his teeth, "yeah. harmless."
you nod, unsure that it's the whole truth, "okay..." you point behind you, gesturing over towards the disfigured snow man whose bottom half lay smaller than its top, it's eyes on opposite sides of its face. "well if you're sure...i'll just go back."
before you can fully turn around, two heavy hands place itself on your shoulders to halt your movements, "no, you should stay and take a break. you've been moving around a lot. i'll finish your snowman with changbin."
you look at hyunjin, eyebrows scrunched together, "are you sure? you don't need to do that, we're almost finished anyway-."
hyunjin looks towards the figure and back towards you, "-no the hell you aren't. don't worry," he reassures, taking a deep breath. you can almost see the captains hat form on his head. "leave it to the artist."
he gives you a light push towards the empty spot next to jeongin, his butt print out lined in the snow on the seat. he turns around and calls out to changbin, "yah! it looks like shit! let me take over!"
"eh? you don't know jack about making a snowman!"
"i know more than you do, genius!" his voice fades away as his stumbles down the hill and towards a grumpy changbin.
you can't help but let out a giggle at the twos bickering. "something is wrong with them."
jeongin tries to nod in agreement but finds himself frozen.
at the lack of a response you turn towards him and see him tense in his spot, "are you okay?" concern drips from your voice as you lean towards him.
he hums quietly, giving you a brief glance and then returning his attention to hyunjin kicking over the snowman. "'m good."
you only nod and face forward.
a couple minutes go by as nothing else is exchanged. your hands begin to freeze due to the lack of heat to your fingers. you pull them out to send a few frosty puffs of air to at least try to heat them up but it doesn't work; you can practically see the icicles grow from your nails.
"it's so cold." you comment, rubbing your hands together.
jeongin perks up at your voice instantly, looking over at the way your shoulders shiver and the weak attempt at warming yourself up. before he even realizes it, he's pulling off his own mittens. "where are your gloves?" he questions, no hints of mockery in his croaky voice.
"gave them to han." you comment, smiling softly, "lee know took his when they were fighting and he wouldn't stop whining about how he was going to have to get his fingers amputated, so i gave him mines."
jeongin can't help the smile making its way to his face at your selflessness. you were always like that, worrying about others before yourself. it was admirable but he wishes you didn't do it as much.
"what about your hands?" he questions, holding out his own pair to you. you kindly reject his offer, pushing away his hands as he tries to force them onto yours.
"what about them?" you retort, "i was keeping them busy, with all the movement it gave me enough warmth."
he can't help but roll his eyes. he gives one last attempt at taking your hands and lets out a little cheer when you relent and give them up. jeongin feels his eyes widen as he looks at the purple color nipping at your fingers, sure you'll get frostbite later. he quickly slides on the wool gloves (much faster than he would've liked- it would've been nice to hold your hands a little longer) and watches satisfied when you lean back on the bench with a relaxed sigh.
with your eyes closed, basking in the new warmth, the feeling of the snowflakes hit the bridge of your nose tickles as you try to brush them off. you can't help the childish giggles that escape you as you scrunch your nose in retaliation.
and jeongin can't help but watch.
all he wanted to do was deny, deny, deny his feelings for you.
he didn't want to complicate the relationship you had built up since you joined the group. he was the first person you talked to, he saw how anxious you were and did everything he could to make you feel comfortable, despite the fact that he was relatively new too and couldn't do much.
sure you were close with all the other members, but you and jeongin had a connection. something deep down that made your tummy hum and your head feel cloudy. every time he was near you he felt- cheesy enough- complete.
jeongin doesn't like you like that.
he couldn't.
"just friends." he thinks, watching as you turn to him with a smile that makes his heart hurt. "just friends."
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12.05.23 | 8:23 p.m;
it had been a couple days since you all went to the park and you can already feel the sickness creeping up your throat.
most of the tea in the house was gone due to the other 8 contracting colds left and right. so when you go into the cabinet to make you another fix it wasn’t surprise to see that the options were limited.
what was surprising was that your chamomile tea, which you bought for yourself only (and jeongin) was sat empty on the shelf.
“son of a-.” you start, turning back towards the rooms lined the hallway, “which one of you bitches drank my tea?”
“me, sorry,” a voice echoes down the hall, “i ran out of mine and yours was the only one that looked good.”
jisung.
“i lend you my gloves and this is how you repay me?” you shout back, opting for some black tea instead, turning on the stove. “just for that you have to do my chores for the next week!”
it’s silent for a concerning second, and then a loud, throaty cough, “girl, fuck you!”
before you could spit out a long winded response, full of curse words you didn’t even know could be strung together, a gentle hand was placed on your back.
“you need to relax, you’ll raise your blood pressure, grandma.”
you turn around and see jeongin standing there with a mask around his face. he’s clad in a matching tracksuit, it was a size too big so it hung off his shoulders, allowing you to see the tank strap he had on underneath.
good lord.
“i’m legit only a couple months older than you.” you retort, pointing a wooden spoon at his face, “not too much on me.”
he laughs and raises his hands in defense, “i apologize.” he does you a favor and starts to put water in the kettle, “if it’s really that serious, i could just go out and get more for you. you don’t have to kill han over it.”
you watch as he places the kettle on the stove and ignites the burner, “i would be doing lee know a favor.”
he laughs again and allows you to take over. “plus you’re sick too.” you add, watching steam slowly blow out of the hole, “i don’t want you to go out and take care of me when you’re in the same state. that ain’t right.”
jeongin says nothing for a moment, trying to find the right words to say. he doesn’t want to lay out all his cards on the table, his confession riddle with coughs and pit stops to wipe his nose. but he wants to say that he doesn’t care that’s he’s sick. that he’ll go back to a few days ago and give you the coat off his back if you asked.
to be honest, just like the gloves, you wouldn’t have to.
he’ll willingly give you anything. even the world if you truly wanted it.
ugh, cheesy.
he pulls out his phone and leans against the counter next to you, "if you wont let me get it, i'll just doordash it."
you perk up, "you can doordash tea?"
jeongin nods and grins, facing the app towards you were the jewel-osco section is pulled up, "uh-yeah? you didn't know that?"
you scoff, "no? i'm not a online food delivery freak like the rest of you."
"you say that until you're asking me to order you some take out at like one in the morning."
you roll your eyes and push him out the way jokingly. the kettle begin to whistle like felix trying to hit a high note and you pour the hot water into the mug. "watch it." you pull down another cup from the cabinet, "and please don't spend your money on me. save it for something better."
jeongin raises an eyebrow, "like what? more clothes?" he jokes, clicking place order. "it's fine. i like buying things for you. even if its something small." small was definitely not the right word after he just spent 10 dollars on a tiny box of packets.
you can't help the heat that rises to your cheeks and turn your back to him, finding sudden interest in the tea in front of you. "i'll pay you back later."
"no need." he says, voice coming out softer than he intended, "like i said, i like buying stuff for you." he watches as your hands pause putting the sachets in the mugs and takes over, "i got it."
you have to force the thank you out of your throat as you stare up at him. maybe its because you're sick, but the lightheaded feeling becomes intense and you have to grip the sides of the counter to stabilize yourself. you watch as his hands move with ease, adding the sugar, then the honey to each respective mug.
he says nothing more, but he doesn't need to really say anything. the intense look on his face voices his thoughts a lot more than he wanted to let on, just like a few days ago. something was on his mind, he just wasn't saying what.
"are you okay?" you ask gently, laying a hesitant hand on his mid-back. you can feel him tense underneath your touch for a spilt second and then his body relaxes. he looks towards you quickly, giving a stiff smile. he pushes the finished tea towards you, your hands incase the hot cup before the liquid can spill over.
"mhm." his fingers dance over the rim of his drink, "why wouldn't i be?"
"i dunno." you reply, "you just look...overwhelmed."
"well, i am sick." he smirks, pulling down his mask to his chin, "everything is a little overwhelmed right now."
you shove him lightly, careful of the cup in his hands, "you know that's not what i mean!" he laughs, "but...you do know you can talk to me right? like, you know i wont judge, right?"
he knows that, in a million years, that you were never critical to his feelings. for as long as he could remember the two of you were going to each other for problems that you couldn't solve alone. but this was a different feeling. and if he were to tell you, he could be ruining a relationship that took a long time to build up. why ruin that rapport for something like a silly crush?
but he couldn't help but wonder if you felt the same? there had been many times where some of the other boys said that you felt the same, even though it wasn't there business to get involved (they do not care). but jeongin knew how they could be. spreading misinterpreted lies to egg on something that most likely isn't true in the first place. they had a tendency to mix up words so why would now be any different?
he's spent all of this time convincing himself that what he felt for you wasn't crush like behaviors. just a good friend looking out for another.
but friends dont get jealous when the other holds another's hand. friends dont get jealous when the other gives another more attention. friends dont have the urge to take them on dates, or have their contact be more than platonic, or to kiss the other.
maybe hyunjin has a point, maybe he does like you.
jeongin feels that if his heart continues on like this, it could stop at any moment. "death by seemingly unrequited love." would look hella embarrassing on his tombstone.
out of all the situation he has been alone with you, why did his heart and mind choose now to tell you? maybe it's the sickness making him vulnerable but he feels a rush of confidence surge through his veins.
"actually," he starts, a nervous shake rattles his vocal cords. he refuses to make eye contact with you, finding interest in his scorching hot cup, "there is something i need to tell you."
you posture immediately straightens and you place down your mug, giving him your undivided attention. usually he loves it, now its burdensome, "oh? what is it?"
the tea shakes under his hold and he mentally curses it for exposing his fear. he wants to do it so bad, it'll be okay, he tries to convince himself. just let it out.
"i've been trying to convince myself for a while that what i feel isn't true but i think i should tell you now."
you nod, urging him to go on.
he takes a deep breath, he isn't trying to stall but the way his insides buckle is making it hard to find the words.
he started it, now he just has to finish.
"y/n, I...," he pauses, "y/n I lik-" before he can get it out there's a big crash coming from down the hall. heavy footsteps stop at the kitchens entrance and lee know stands there covered in bubbles.
"what the hell happened?" you comment, rushing over to him while holding back a laugh. he looks like the pillsbury dough boy standing there eagle spread.
lee know coughs and you swear you see several suds fly from his mouth. "seungmin. i'll kill him, i swear i will."
you let out a laugh and brush the soap from his shoulders. it takes you a second to remember but when you do you turn back around to look at jeongin, "i'm so sorry what were you saying?" you start to say only to find the tea he was drinking abandoned on the counter.
"jeongin?"
jeongin barely hears you call out his name as he rushes down the hall and towards his room. he can't help the tears that brim in his eyes and he starts to feel pathetic wiping them away.
what the hell was he thinking? admitting he liked you was hard enough on himself, so why did he think admitting it to you was a good idea?
as he sits on his bed, he can't help but feel a piece of him gone. you most likely didn't know where he was getting at, you didn't know that he was confessing to you in that moment. but the embarrassment of him understanding his words were worse. there was no way he could face you after that. for his own dignity.
as he cries he can't help but think;
it's always different, i am the one in love.
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part 2?
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ohtobeleah · 1 year
Note
Hey hope this is okay and still open✌🏻😅
Breeding kink with Hangman. If you've already done that, that's fine as well🥰
Thanks, hun, love your writing
Say no more anon I got you covered.
Warnings: This is Strictly Scandalous, Smut ahead.
I feel like I see a lot of breeding kinks for Bradley but never enough for Jake. Before we get into the smut of it all I think this would be a really good time to tag your fav fic writers that have written for Jake Hangman Seresin and the sudden breeding kink he finds he has when he finds the right partner. The love of his life. 
I think Jake would have the sudden urge to procreate after he sees you doing something so incredibly mundane and motherly? LIke perhaps you were brought up watching your own mother make your fathers lunches in the morning while he got ready for work. So it's in your inherent nature, not because you feel like you have to, but because acts of service are your love language and it makes you just as happy. Maybe you just liked cooking and the smell of whatever you were concocting in the slow cooker is just all too much for Jake to not think about what you would be like as a mother. 
So he catches himself thinking about the idea of you being all swollen and full of his cum far more often than he’d like to admit when he should really be focusing on flying the multi-million dollar fighter jet he's being the throttle of.
Jake catches himself at the Hard Deck, watching you play with his niece and nephew who have come to visit and thinking damn–what if that were your kids. His kids. He had to pause and take an exaggerated sigh before taking his shot in the game of pool he's playing with Bradley because he can't concentrate thinking about what you would look like pregnant with his child. He’d never really been the type of guy to think about a family–but then you came along and rocked his boat and now Jake's drowning in the thought of you being the mother of his children and he can't think or anything else. 
“You wanna make me a mama baby?” You’re straddling Jake's lap, ever so painfully bouncing on his length. Your slick walls coating him in your arousal as he guides you up and down, up and down. Biting his bottom lip because you know he's been acting funny lately and you know it's because of his new found fetish. “Bet you'd be a great daddy, been calling you that for years.” 
“Dont–” Jakes gritting his teeth, trying his best not to give into his temptations. “If I start, I won't be able to stop till you're carrying my child.” He says it almost like a threat, a warning lingering on his tongue while you sink low on his cock and lean in to whisper into his ear. Biting his earlobe gently as you smile against his flushed skin. Jake ran hot, you knew that, but he was as hot as a furnace with you naked on top of him, riding him at an agonisingly slow rhythm in the dimly lit living room. 
“Make me a mama Hangman.” You chuckle. “Wanna have your babies, make you the best daddy in the world.” Jake knows hes fucked when you start picking up the pace, your hands sliding down his explosed chest before theyre coming up to squeeze at your tits, you know he likes it when you play with yourself. His own personal porno. He snaps when you moan his name, the nickname falling off your sweet lips like you were made just for him. “Jakey–”
He takes that as all her permission he needs to flood you, taking control as he shifts you up slightly on your knees, pulling you flush against his chest and holding your arms together behind your back. Jakes taken control. He fucking up into you, groaning every time he feels his tip kiss your cervix. 
“Ahhh fugghh–yess, yess Jake!” 
“Bet you’re gonna look all kinds of beautiful carrying our baby around mama.” Jake instantly falls in love with the term of endearment. “Gonna fuck a baby right into you mama.” Jakes in heaven, he really is. You're moaning above him, clenching him so good before you’re milking him to the point he's bone dry, he couldn't give you anymore if he tried. He was spent by the time his orgasm is draining him of every ounce of fluid in his body. 
“I should go clean up–” You're dismounting, but Jake's following you, trapping you between him and the lounge as he lays you down. “What are you playing at Lieutenant?” Jake loves when you call him Lieutenant, you aren't navy so you don't often. But when you do, it sends his heart clear out of this world because he knows there is nothing but pride behind the status. 
“I'm gonna make sure that when you pee on that silly little piss stick in a few weeks that it’ll be positive.” He's kissing your lips to silence your protest as he guides two of his digits into your folds, collecting the load he just pumped into you that had started to drip, before pushing it back into you.
“Mmmm, Jake–” 
“Does that feel good mama?” Yep, he wasn't gonna stop calling you that, not now not ever. “You like when I finger fuck my cum into you?” He knows the answer he’ll get will be a whimper of pleasure just by the way your back is arching off the lounge. Your nails digging into his exposed back–surely to leave red raw lines trailing from his neck to the small of his back. “Gonna do this every damn time, make sure you're carrying our baby in no time.” 
“What if I just want you to fuck me all over again?” You raise your brow, biting at your bottom lip as Jake stills, the idea hadnt popped into his head, but now that you had planted the seed his cock was standing to attention and raring to go again. Twitching at the thought of being buried in your cum soaked cunt. “I mean if we’re gonna do this we may as well do it right huh baby?” Jakes processing the idea and he's down for it, but he knows that he gave you everything he had in the first round. 
Jakes kissing you, pulling his fingers out of your pussy before sucking the mix of his own cum and your arousal off his middle digits before jumping off the lounge, leaving you to follow him with your gaze as you sit up on your elbows. 
“Jake?” You question as he disappears around the corner, shouting back at you in response. It only makes you laugh at the father of your future children. 
“I need a gatorade, I'll be right back.”
***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***
Strictly Scandalous // Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin
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