soothinglee

[soothinglee]

thank you guys so much for the support (>﹏<)🤍

coffee shop breakdowns──★ ˙☕️ ̟ ¡!

| choi beomgyu x fem! reader ─ 2.69k wc✔︎

my notes⎯ i've always wanted to write something coffee shop au and at first i was going to write for yunjin of zb1 but change of plans lol ! (ill still write for yunjin in the future though !) I hope you enjoy, i tried to make it funny( 〃．．). (i know the ending is abrupt, it's 1 am and im exhausted and i really want to publish this). warnings⎯ swearing (mainly f bombs), mentions of exhaustion and overworking (?), and taehyun makes a brief appearance. songs⎯ 사랑으로; wave to earth

나의 작은 마음도 그 안에 작은 파도처럼 부서지고 밀려와선 네게 녹아내리고 그제서야 보이는 나의 영원

⎯ navigation✰ [requests are open]

THE COFFEE SHOP was always busy between 9 to noon, when the college students came in for a fix of caffeinated shots after staying up late cramming in assignments, or partying.

The line of people continued to grow until it reached the door, making it hard for newcomers to come in. Some opted to hop back into their cars and into the deserted drive-through. With each order came more glassware, covered in sticky toppings and cookie crumbs. Unfortunately for you, you always seemed to get scheduled on busy days. Even more unfortunate, the glorified task of dish duty was assigned under your name at the start of your 8-hour shift.  

You reach up to nudge the tight knot on your apron's neck.

If exhaustion doesn’t kill you by the end of the night, the choker on your neck should do the trick.

After putting another load into the dishwasher, which was on its last leg due to its slight malfunction when you got a spoon stuck in the disposal, you bend over the sink. There was a slight twitch in your eye out of the sheer annoyance that yet another person went on their break when you had yet to get your own.

The screaming baby in dining is not helping the raging headache pounding in your temple.

“Will someone shut that thing up?” a grunt rises from your throat as you go to stand, wincing when your back cracks loudly.

In the corner of your eye, you see a hand place another dish in the black tub, and a laugh follows. “That's not a nice way to talk about a paying customer.”

You don’t even have to turn around to know who it is.

“If you think a baby works a 9-5 job, with enough money to afford a cup of coffee in this economy, you have another thing coming for you.” The rebuttal comes easy from your lips, months of practice and debates working in your favor with fast responses. 

“I mean if they really put their mind to it, babies could take over the world.” The response is quick and witty, an unconscious choice of words followed by a playful hip bump that makes you keel over and onto the wall. Your knees were so close to giving in after standing all day. The thought of sitting on the floor, though covered in unidentifiable grit, seems like heaven for the joints. “Long day?”

A scoff leaves your lips as your head connects to the wall. A way of saying you have no idea. The weight of your eyelids grow heavier with every passing second. No matter how many times you try to keep them open, it’s to no avail.

You look like a toddler fighting sleep.

The question passes through one ear and out the other. Your co-worker waits for another second (perhaps for a response) then giggles when there is none. Though you can’t see him, you can vaguely imagine what he’s doing with all of the commotion going around the cramped space. There’s a slosh coming from the three-compartment sink, a rag hitting the dishes hurriedly, and then the dishwasher handle being pulled up paired with a strenuous huff. 

“Holy fuck this thing is heavy,” is mumbled quietly as more thumping continues. Something in the more conscious part of you can't figure out if the room is spinning beneath the dark in your eyes or the headache that spreads itself to the base of your skull. 

Where's Tylenol when you need it?

“Beomgyu,” The name comes out weak- a thick coat of fatigue blankets your throat. You clear it a couple of times before trying again. “You don’t have to do it for me.”

Please, please, please do it for me.

He stops pouring out the unused coffee grains to look down and give you a judgmental once over. His eyes flit to your frizzy wannabe ponytail that has one too many flyways, to the apron string on your shoulder that was one fast head turn to the man upstairs, and then to your jeans, that were covered ankles up in milk and chocolate sauce?

Beomgyu hopes that it's chocolate sauce.

With the way he looks at you, a fire lights your cheeks ablaze and you have to turn your head away from him. It feels like you're on RuPaul's Drag Race getting judged on the dress you made but it looks like a ten-can special and a bottle of mid-life crisis. The embarrassment wants to conceal itself with a “Bitch you don’t look better!” retort, but your mouth is glued shut.

“With the way you’re slouched over, I don’t think I have a choice.” He sighs almost pitifully, who knows for you or himself. Even though he was the one who willingly started doing your tasks for you. After a second the tap stops, and then some shuffles of footsteps. They become louder until it stops. “Get up, you look pathetic.”

Get up?

Without realizing it, at some point your body went dumb and slid itself onto the floor. It was a relief to be off your feet and to let your body rest but at the same time,, you can’t remember the last time these floors said hello to a mop and pine-sol. Oh boy. Good thing today is wash day.

“Can’t.” 

Beomgyu raises an eyebrow and lets out an agitated breath. “The hell you can.”

“Can’t.” You repeat, throwing in a piteous whine, lifting up your arms so forcefully that he flinches back quickly. “Up.”

“(Name)…” The desperation in his voice is comical. He does not want to lift you like a child. “You are a grown woman, this is embarrassing for you.” He says it like multiple people are watching, a crowd to be sheepish around in your debilitation. You give him a look; eyebrows scrunched, lips upturned, and the worst case of stink eye. Your arms are still dangling limply in the air.

He hesitates for a second. 

And another.

 Then finally, he grabs you by the wrists, and for a second it feels like you’re flying. It seems as though he might have underestimated how much strength to put into the haul because after what feels like minutes in the air you go crashing into his arms.

“You need to take a shower.”

“And you need to change your clothes. Looks like you got shit on your pants.”

He maneuvers your arms first, throwing one of them over his shoulder while trying to keep you upright with his other hand. You were exhausted to the point where you couldn’t keep your eyes open, but not to the point where you couldn’t stand. You allowed yourself to fall limp to give him a hard time.

He struggles for a few seconds, panicking when you almost slip from his grasp. You can tell that he's nervous about holding you, the way his hands stutter trying to find a place to put them to hold you up. They move from your waist, to your side, to your stomach, finally finding its home in your belt loop. If that would’ve lasted any longer you would have just placed his hand wherever and told him to hurry the hell up.

“You don’t look any better,” you grab onto his left shoulder, holding the material in a tight grip because you do not trust Choi Beomgyu to keep you steady, “You got a little something…” there's a small smudge of coffee dust in the middle of his chest and you put your finger on it.

Beomgyu looks at you funny then at your finger, and after a moment a sly smirk plays on your lips.

What a dumbass.

With a slick flick of the finger you pop him in the nose. Effectively making him reel his head back in pain. “There.” 

 At his reaction you start to cackle loudly like a deranged person. You have to bend over to catch your breath, taking Beomgyu down with you. He tries to shimmy your hand off of his shoulder but you have an iron clasp, and after a moment he gives up seeing you aren't detaching yourself anytime soon. “Ow-! You bitch!”

There's an instant change of emotion. A sarcastic frown replaces the beaming smile. Beomgyu feels heat rising up his neck. For some reason, it’s not because he feels mad, but the way you're looking at him makes him feel…uncomfortable?

He’s unsure.

“That’s no way to talk to a lady.” You reply, allowing him to drag you like a rag doll to the break table. A small school desk hidden behind an enormous ice machine that admits heat hotter than the Sahara. 

“Nothing about you is considered ‘a lady’.”

“Girl fuck you.”

As you pass by the short hallway leading to the front a head peeks out of the main office. Tufts of black hair and wide eyes look around the corner towards Beomgyu (trying) holding you as you still cackle from the childish trick you pulled on him. The look on his face is indescribable, blank but definitely annoyed.

“Everything… okay out here?” Taehyun asks before he actually takes a good look at the two of you. After a second of staring he blinks, “Beomgyu, why are you holding (Name)?”

He points to you without looking and responds monotonously, “She’s going on her break now. Have Iseul take over for her in the meantime.” Taehyun nods and slithers back into the office without another word.

“Aww Beomgyu,” You coo, letting out a breath when he throws you into one of the two chairs, “You’re so sweet, you didn’t have to do this for me.” Your hand finds its way to his cheek, pinching the skin lightly like a grandma would a young child. Who knows why, but he allows it to happen a second longer, your face scrunched up affectionately as you mumble out praises.

He swats your hand away, rubbing at the reddened skin, “You’re right, I didn’t.” You frown again, “I’m doing this out of the kindness of my heart.”

“You have a heart?”

He doesn't say anything in response. His hand connects with your forehead, pushing it back with enough force that it sends you backward, leaning against the wall. There's a shout at the register that you can’t quite make out, but by the way, Beomgyu takes a glance at you and then back towards the cashier and then runs off, you can only imagine that it's regarding you and the lack of clean cups up front. Man forget those cups. Your entire body feels sluggish and your brain feels insanely heavy. A nap sounds so good right now but you're not even halfway through your shift and still have 5 hours left to complete.

Somewhere in the conscious part of your mind, you make a mental note to change your hours.

If you remember.

You don’t know how long it's been since Beomgyu left you but at some point you began to doze off. Roughly around NREM 1 and 2 a voice abruptly breaks the silence, “Whipped cream or no whipped cream?”

A snort leaves your mouth as you jolt up, startled. “What?”

“Whipped cream or no whipped cream?” He repeats back, irritation lacing his words as he taps his foot impatiently as if he has anywhere else to be.

“Um…” You respond after a moment, still not coherently present, “Whipped…cream…?”

Beomgyu nods his head once and disappears again.

He’s so fucking strange.

Your relationship with Beomgyu has always been a little weird. From the beginning when he first joined the team he was this nervous ball of energy, always messing up orders and occasionally spilling coffee on customers. You had, obviously, given him shit for it because it’s not that hard to mess up a latte. To your surprise that nervous energy made him a good fast talker because it took you two days to finally understand the insults he spat back. The next shift you two had together was not… pleasant, to say the least.

It was mainly a game of cat and mouse, you’d say something to aggravate him and he’d respond, and vice versa. It was fun, it kept you on your toes and gave you something to look forward to every time you had to work. Having a job at a coffee shop always keeps you moving and a lot more times than you’d like, it makes you extremely exhausted. Unfortunately, like today.

However, despite not being completely present- it made you realize that this was the first you’ve interacted so…civilly with Beomgyu. Sure, there were a few back-and-forth in the last forty-five minutes but still. You were mainly known as enemies so the fact that he didn’t ditch you to fend for yourself and did some of your work was surprising.

The feeling of perspiration on your fingers immediately wakes you up again. When you open your eyes you find Beomgyu back in front of you. Hands wrapped around a medium iced latte that was covered in a mountain of whipped cream. And funnily enough- chocolate sauce.

You choose not to say anything about how he didn't mess up this time.

“What's this?”

“What does it look like, dipshit? It’s coffee.”

You ignored the comment, “Okay yeah, duh, but why?”

Beomgyu rolls his eyes and pushes the plastic cup to your hands. You don’t pick it up, “Look at you,” he starts, his eyes downcast towards the pool of water collecting on the table, “You can barely keep your eyes open. You work at a coffee shop, I thought you’d be smarter than this.”

You still don't pick it up.

Instead, you narrow your eyes at him.

“You poisoned this shit, didn't you?”

“Excuse me?” he crosses his arms defensively, “Why would I want to poison you?

You shrug, reaching up to toy with the straw. It looks so good. “Why wouldn’t you?”

Beomgyu lets a long exhale and aggressively pulls out the second chair, quickly taking a seat. He wastes no time grabbing on the straw and bending it slightly so it curves at the top and vigorously brings it to you lips. You pursed them and turned your head away, “I don’t wanna.”

“Stop acting like a child for a second and please drink. I am not your babysitter.”

“You probably spat in it.”

“I didn’t- you know what?” He hastily brings the straw to his own lips and takes a brief sip. “Mmmm- Mmm! Yummy! So good and no spit, Mmmm!”

You eye the drink and then his lips for a second indecisively before grabbing onto his wrist and bringing the drink to you. “Give me this, you freak.”

A pleased smile plays on his lips as he watches you almost down the entire thing in one sip. He doesn’t comment on how you still hold onto his wrist when you finished, or when you let out a satisfied sigh while staring at him…warmly?

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Why’d you make the drink?”

“Because you needed it…” he trails off but then adds, “And no one else can take the rest of your shift today so you need to wake up and do your job.” 

You continue staring at him and Beomgyu can see the wheels turning in your head, then a burst of energy makes you sit up straight, pointing accusing a finger in his face. It wavers in the air as your eyes go to slits, trying to sniff him out. He tries his best to seem unaffected. There's a beat, and then, “You like me, don’t you?”

“Excuse me?” He shouts a little too loudly and defensively for someone who doesn't like you like that. He really doesn’t-

“Helping me with my work, finding my stand-in, covering for me, making me a drink to feel better.” You list off on one hand, the other one still attached to his wrist. He tries to pry your fingers off but you’re stronger than a bull. He’s not going anywhere, “If you don't like me like that then it seems that at least you want to be my friend.”

-does he?

thank you for reading ! (don't forget to like and reblog please !)

[soothinglee]

coming soon 🍿

[soothinglee]

it's completed ! hope you enjoy !

teaser to a new fic coming soon...?ヽ(´o｀；

should i leave who it’s with a secret ?

#soothinglee #choi beomgyu x reader #coffee shop au

[soothinglee]

coffee shop breakdowns──★ ˙☕️ ̟ ¡!

| choi beomgyu x fem! reader ─ 2.69k wc✔︎

my notes⎯ i've always wanted to write something coffee shop au and at first i was going to write for yunjin of zb1 but change of plans lol ! (ill still write for yunjin in the future though !) I hope you enjoy, i tried to make it funny( 〃．．). (i know the ending is abrupt, it's 1 am and im exhausted and i really want to publish this). warnings⎯ swearing (mainly f bombs), mentions of exhaustion and overworking (?), and taehyun makes a brief appearance. songs⎯ 사랑으로; wave to earth

나의 작은 마음도 그 안에 작은 파도처럼 부서지고 밀려와선 네게 녹아내리고 그제서야 보이는 나의 영원

⎯ navigation✰ [requests are open]

THE COFFEE SHOP was always busy between 9 to noon, when the college students came in for a fix of caffeinated shots after staying up late cramming in assignments, or partying.

The line of people continued to grow until it reached the door, making it hard for newcomers to come in. Some opted to hop back into their cars and into the deserted drive-through. With each order came more glassware, covered in sticky toppings and cookie crumbs. Unfortunately for you, you always seemed to get scheduled on busy days. Even more unfortunate, the glorified task of dish duty was assigned under your name at the start of your 8-hour shift.  

You reach up to nudge the tight knot on your apron's neck.

If exhaustion doesn’t kill you by the end of the night, the choker on your neck should do the trick.

After putting another load into the dishwasher, which was on its last leg due to its slight malfunction when you got a spoon stuck in the disposal, you bend over the sink. There was a slight twitch in your eye out of the sheer annoyance that yet another person went on their break when you had yet to get your own.

The screaming baby in dining is not helping the raging headache pounding in your temple.

“Will someone shut that thing up?” a grunt rises from your throat as you go to stand, wincing when your back cracks loudly.

In the corner of your eye, you see a hand place another dish in the black tub, and a laugh follows. “That's not a nice way to talk about a paying customer.”

You don’t even have to turn around to know who it is.

“If you think a baby works a 9-5 job, with enough money to afford a cup of coffee in this economy, you have another thing coming for you.” The rebuttal comes easy from your lips, months of practice and debates working in your favor with fast responses. 

“I mean if they really put their mind to it, babies could take over the world.” The response is quick and witty, an unconscious choice of words followed by a playful hip bump that makes you keel over and onto the wall. Your knees were so close to giving in after standing all day. The thought of sitting on the floor, though covered in unidentifiable grit, seems like heaven for the joints. “Long day?”

A scoff leaves your lips as your head connects to the wall. A way of saying you have no idea. The weight of your eyelids grow heavier with every passing second. No matter how many times you try to keep them open, it’s to no avail.

You look like a toddler fighting sleep.

The question passes through one ear and out the other. Your co-worker waits for another second (perhaps for a response) then giggles when there is none. Though you can’t see him, you can vaguely imagine what he’s doing with all of the commotion going around the cramped space. There’s a slosh coming from the three-compartment sink, a rag hitting the dishes hurriedly, and then the dishwasher handle being pulled up paired with a strenuous huff. 

“Holy fuck this thing is heavy,” is mumbled quietly as more thumping continues. Something in the more conscious part of you can't figure out if the room is spinning beneath the dark in your eyes or the headache that spreads itself to the base of your skull. 

Where's Tylenol when you need it?

“Beomgyu,” The name comes out weak- a thick coat of fatigue blankets your throat. You clear it a couple of times before trying again. “You don’t have to do it for me.”

Please, please, please do it for me.

He stops pouring out the unused coffee grains to look down and give you a judgmental once over. His eyes flit to your frizzy wannabe ponytail that has one too many flyways, to the apron string on your shoulder that was one fast head turn to the man upstairs, and then to your jeans, that were covered ankles up in milk and chocolate sauce?

Beomgyu hopes that it's chocolate sauce.

With the way he looks at you, a fire lights your cheeks ablaze and you have to turn your head away from him. It feels like you're on RuPaul's Drag Race getting judged on the dress you made but it looks like a ten-can special and a bottle of mid-life crisis. The embarrassment wants to conceal itself with a “Bitch you don’t look better!” retort, but your mouth is glued shut.

“With the way you’re slouched over, I don’t think I have a choice.” He sighs almost pitifully, who knows for you or himself. Even though he was the one who willingly started doing your tasks for you. After a second the tap stops, and then some shuffles of footsteps. They become louder until it stops. “Get up, you look pathetic.”

Get up?

Without realizing it, at some point your body went dumb and slid itself onto the floor. It was a relief to be off your feet and to let your body rest but at the same time,, you can’t remember the last time these floors said hello to a mop and pine-sol. Oh boy. Good thing today is wash day.

“Can’t.” 

Beomgyu raises an eyebrow and lets out an agitated breath. “The hell you can.”

“Can’t.” You repeat, throwing in a piteous whine, lifting up your arms so forcefully that he flinches back quickly. “Up.”

“(Name)…” The desperation in his voice is comical. He does not want to lift you like a child. “You are a grown woman, this is embarrassing for you.” He says it like multiple people are watching, a crowd to be sheepish around in your debilitation. You give him a look; eyebrows scrunched, lips upturned, and the worst case of stink eye. Your arms are still dangling limply in the air.

He hesitates for a second. 

And another.

 Then finally, he grabs you by the wrists, and for a second it feels like you’re flying. It seems as though he might have underestimated how much strength to put into the haul because after what feels like minutes in the air you go crashing into his arms.

“You need to take a shower.”

“And you need to change your clothes. Looks like you got shit on your pants.”

He maneuvers your arms first, throwing one of them over his shoulder while trying to keep you upright with his other hand. You were exhausted to the point where you couldn’t keep your eyes open, but not to the point where you couldn’t stand. You allowed yourself to fall limp to give him a hard time.

He struggles for a few seconds, panicking when you almost slip from his grasp. You can tell that he's nervous about holding you, the way his hands stutter trying to find a place to put them to hold you up. They move from your waist, to your side, to your stomach, finally finding its home in your belt loop. If that would’ve lasted any longer you would have just placed his hand wherever and told him to hurry the hell up.

“You don’t look any better,” you grab onto his left shoulder, holding the material in a tight grip because you do not trust Choi Beomgyu to keep you steady, “You got a little something…” there's a small smudge of coffee dust in the middle of his chest and you put your finger on it.

Beomgyu looks at you funny then at your finger, and after a moment a sly smirk plays on your lips.

What a dumbass.

With a slick flick of the finger you pop him in the nose. Effectively making him reel his head back in pain. “There.” 

 At his reaction you start to cackle loudly like a deranged person. You have to bend over to catch your breath, taking Beomgyu down with you. He tries to shimmy your hand off of his shoulder but you have an iron clasp, and after a moment he gives up seeing you aren't detaching yourself anytime soon. “Ow-! You bitch!”

There's an instant change of emotion. A sarcastic frown replaces the beaming smile. Beomgyu feels heat rising up his neck. For some reason, it’s not because he feels mad, but the way you're looking at him makes him feel…uncomfortable?

He’s unsure.

“That’s no way to talk to a lady.” You reply, allowing him to drag you like a rag doll to the break table. A small school desk hidden behind an enormous ice machine that admits heat hotter than the Sahara. 

“Nothing about you is considered ‘a lady’.”

“Girl fuck you.”

As you pass by the short hallway leading to the front a head peeks out of the main office. Tufts of black hair and wide eyes look around the corner towards Beomgyu (trying) holding you as you still cackle from the childish trick you pulled on him. The look on his face is indescribable, blank but definitely annoyed.

“Everything… okay out here?” Taehyun asks before he actually takes a good look at the two of you. After a second of staring he blinks, “Beomgyu, why are you holding (Name)?”

He points to you without looking and responds monotonously, “She’s going on her break now. Have Iseul take over for her in the meantime.” Taehyun nods and slithers back into the office without another word.

“Aww Beomgyu,” You coo, letting out a breath when he throws you into one of the two chairs, “You’re so sweet, you didn’t have to do this for me.” Your hand finds its way to his cheek, pinching the skin lightly like a grandma would a young child. Who knows why, but he allows it to happen a second longer, your face scrunched up affectionately as you mumble out praises.

He swats your hand away, rubbing at the reddened skin, “You’re right, I didn’t.” You frown again, “I’m doing this out of the kindness of my heart.”

“You have a heart?”

He doesn't say anything in response. His hand connects with your forehead, pushing it back with enough force that it sends you backward, leaning against the wall. There's a shout at the register that you can’t quite make out, but by the way, Beomgyu takes a glance at you and then back towards the cashier and then runs off, you can only imagine that it's regarding you and the lack of clean cups up front. Man forget those cups. Your entire body feels sluggish and your brain feels insanely heavy. A nap sounds so good right now but you're not even halfway through your shift and still have 5 hours left to complete.

Somewhere in the conscious part of your mind, you make a mental note to change your hours.

If you remember.

You don’t know how long it's been since Beomgyu left you but at some point you began to doze off. Roughly around NREM 1 and 2 a voice abruptly breaks the silence, “Whipped cream or no whipped cream?”

A snort leaves your mouth as you jolt up, startled. “What?”

“Whipped cream or no whipped cream?” He repeats back, irritation lacing his words as he taps his foot impatiently as if he has anywhere else to be.

“Um…” You respond after a moment, still not coherently present, “Whipped…cream…?”

Beomgyu nods his head once and disappears again.

He’s so fucking strange.

Your relationship with Beomgyu has always been a little weird. From the beginning when he first joined the team he was this nervous ball of energy, always messing up orders and occasionally spilling coffee on customers. You had, obviously, given him shit for it because it’s not that hard to mess up a latte. To your surprise that nervous energy made him a good fast talker because it took you two days to finally understand the insults he spat back. The next shift you two had together was not… pleasant, to say the least.

It was mainly a game of cat and mouse, you’d say something to aggravate him and he’d respond, and vice versa. It was fun, it kept you on your toes and gave you something to look forward to every time you had to work. Having a job at a coffee shop always keeps you moving and a lot more times than you’d like, it makes you extremely exhausted. Unfortunately, like today.

However, despite not being completely present- it made you realize that this was the first you’ve interacted so…civilly with Beomgyu. Sure, there were a few back-and-forth in the last forty-five minutes but still. You were mainly known as enemies so the fact that he didn’t ditch you to fend for yourself and did some of your work was surprising.

The feeling of perspiration on your fingers immediately wakes you up again. When you open your eyes you find Beomgyu back in front of you. Hands wrapped around a medium iced latte that was covered in a mountain of whipped cream. And funnily enough- chocolate sauce.

You choose not to say anything about how he didn't mess up this time.

“What's this?”

“What does it look like, dipshit? It’s coffee.”

You ignored the comment, “Okay yeah, duh, but why?”

Beomgyu rolls his eyes and pushes the plastic cup to your hands. You don’t pick it up, “Look at you,” he starts, his eyes downcast towards the pool of water collecting on the table, “You can barely keep your eyes open. You work at a coffee shop, I thought you’d be smarter than this.”

You still don't pick it up.

Instead, you narrow your eyes at him.

“You poisoned this shit, didn't you?”

“Excuse me?” he crosses his arms defensively, “Why would I want to poison you?

You shrug, reaching up to toy with the straw. It looks so good. “Why wouldn’t you?”

Beomgyu lets a long exhale and aggressively pulls out the second chair, quickly taking a seat. He wastes no time grabbing on the straw and bending it slightly so it curves at the top and vigorously brings it to you lips. You pursed them and turned your head away, “I don’t wanna.”

“Stop acting like a child for a second and please drink. I am not your babysitter.”

“You probably spat in it.”

“I didn’t- you know what?” He hastily brings the straw to his own lips and takes a brief sip. “Mmmm- Mmm! Yummy! So good and no spit, Mmmm!”

You eye the drink and then his lips for a second indecisively before grabbing onto his wrist and bringing the drink to you. “Give me this, you freak.”

A pleased smile plays on his lips as he watches you almost down the entire thing in one sip. He doesn’t comment on how you still hold onto his wrist when you finished, or when you let out a satisfied sigh while staring at him…warmly?

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Why’d you make the drink?”

“Because you needed it…” he trails off but then adds, “And no one else can take the rest of your shift today so you need to wake up and do your job.” 

You continue staring at him and Beomgyu can see the wheels turning in your head, then a burst of energy makes you sit up straight, pointing accusing a finger in his face. It wavers in the air as your eyes go to slits, trying to sniff him out. He tries his best to seem unaffected. There's a beat, and then, “You like me, don’t you?”

“Excuse me?” He shouts a little too loudly and defensively for someone who doesn't like you like that. He really doesn’t-

“Helping me with my work, finding my stand-in, covering for me, making me a drink to feel better.” You list off on one hand, the other one still attached to his wrist. He tries to pry your fingers off but you’re stronger than a bull. He’s not going anywhere, “If you don't like me like that then it seems that at least you want to be my friend.”

-does he?

thank you for reading ! (don't forget to like and reblog please !)

#x reader #x y/n #x you #choi beomgyu x reader #choi beomgyu x you #choi beomgyu x y/n #beomgyu x reader #beomgyu x you #beomgyu x y/n #beomgyu x fem! reader #coffee shop au #tomorrow x together #tomorrow x together fanfic #txt beomgyu x reader #txt beomgyu x you #txt beomgyu x y/n #soothinglee #txt imagines #txt fanfic

[soothinglee]

ahh thank you for the tag !ヽ(´o｀；

BORING ??? atleast i’m surviving.

tagging ⎯ @cinnamostar , @0x1lovebot , @gyuworm , and @feelbokkie !

ASSIGNING YOU A HORROR PROTAGONIST TROPE!

THE QUIZ & PICREW

thank you so much for the tag kaybae :3 @alvojake TAGGING. @luvhyun3 @jungqkook @ctrlemis @enhalpy @koishua @boyfhee @heelvsted @heesbaby @cornenhapovs @www-jungwon @okwonyo @eeunoia @leaderwon @tyunni @jjunae @stariekis @lheebra @isoobie @lilyuwon @ms-no1kpopstan @theyluvvaubery @fakeuwus @jaylaxies @moon7jay @sserasin @sparklovespink (no pressure!)+ anyone who wants to do this just reblog from me > 3 < !

THE MONSTER FEELS SORRY FOR ME??? HELP?? Thank you???

[soothinglee]

teaser to a new fic coming soon...?ヽ(´o｀；

should i leave who it’s with a secret ?

#soothinglee #sooleeteasers📑 #bg kpop

[soothinglee]

ily🤍ヽ(´o｀；

what would i do? (without someone like you) ──★ ˙🌱 ̟ ¡!

bangchan x ninth member! reader | 1.6k words✔︎

my notes⎯ i re-wrote this thing so many times i've lost count lol. i don't know if i'm satisfied with this because i couldn't convey the feeling as well as i wanted but i still like it! hope you enjoy! (also #bangchantakecareofyourself) warnings⎯ self neglect, reader taking care of bangchan. genre⎯ ninth member! au, angst, comfort, (heavily implied) self-neglect, platonic. songs⎯ what would i do?; strawberry guy

⎯catalog for skz✰ | ⎯ navigation✰ [requests are open]

"are you okay chan?"

the question lingers in the air for a hot second. it floats around until it hits the distracted ear of chan, who sits with his face resting on his chin, unmoving from his seat at the desk.

he blinks after a second, the fog slowly clearing from his eyes.

"huh?" his voice sounds distant as he resumes fiddling with the unfinished track.

you could tell that something was off in his demeanor. his postured was slouched, arms weak in their positions as he tries to fight off the sleep to continue working. you figured it had been a while since he had rest. you all were pre-paring for a comeback and with that comes a lot of work. new concepts, new looks, new songs. a high expectation bangchan finds himself fretting over due to the preconceived notions stays has on the upcoming album.

you've seen bangchan re-write a song 15 times because he thought stays wouldn't like one lyric. everyone, including you, has told him that he could only remove that one line, and keep the rest but he had the idea that everything has to flow together. which is why he's on take #16.

you give him a once over, your brows creasing. "i said are you okay?" he gives you a quick glance, his head bouncing as he goes back to his laptop, "how about you take a break?"

"can't."

a quiet sigh leaves your lips as you get up from the couch. the sky had darken as more time was spent in the studio, the only light source was the small table lamp in the far corner in the room. even then you could see just how much all of this was affecting him.

his eyes were sunken in, big purple-red like bruises encase them. he lifts up his hand to rub at the irritated skin. anyone could tell that he was exhausted.

your hands come up to rub out the kinks in his shoulders, "you're exhausted."

his body is defiant in letting him relax into your soothing touch, he hesitates for a second, letting the final moments of the massage sit in before he lightly shakes you off. "no time for sleep. i took a nap earlier, and i had a cup of coffee." he goes back to the track he was clipping.

an eyebrow raise, "how much earlier?"

this time he sighs and drops both hands. "y/n..."

"i'm just looking out for you. as the leader you have to take care of yourself, because if you aren't, then how do you expect to take care of us?" you know the question hits hard when you feel his body freeze underneath your hands. you stare at the back of his head, in the corner of your eye you see his shadow move a fraction and then his head drops. "you know that you don't have to be so hard on yourself," you take a moment to gauge his reaction, then a soft, "right?"

he releases a shaky breath, muttering.

you let your hands find the base of his neck, letting them go down to follow the path of his shoulder, willing the words from his throat. when you first joined stray kids, you were extremely nervous to the point where you couldn't speak, bangchan found that the movement worked well. you hoped it would work as well in your favor.

"i" he starts, his voice broken under the amount of stress resting on his chest, "yeah...i know."

you nod to yourself, a prideful smile on your lips, "okay then, why don't you take a break, let han or changbin finish it up in the morning," he goes to interject but you're quick to cut in, "and don't worry about putting this on them," taking the words from his mouth, "i'm sure they won't mind.

for the first time since he entered the studio, it's been almost 5 hours, he looks up at you and you can just see how much it's all affecting him, even down to the glassy look rising in his eyes.

he doesn't say anything but stare. he still looks hesitant. like at any moment he'll run off with the laptop and lock himself in a closet.

you stare back.

30 seconds, maybe a minute passes before a defeated look crosses over his face, letting his head drop onto your outstretched arm. wordlessly, he gives you one last look, then turns around to save the file, exit out of the software, and shuts down his computer.

"okay."

"okay?" you can't help the happiness that laces your tone.

"okay, i'll take a break, get some rest."

a squeal escapes your throat as you hold yourself back from celebrating, you honestly didn't think it was going to be as easy as it was. "i'm glad you're doing this, you need to give yourself some time to repair." you step back as he rises from the chair, holding on to his arm as he tries to return the feeling back to his legs, "how about you let me take care of you tonight? we can stop by the convenience store on the way home and pick up some snacks?"

chan immediately shakes his head, "i can't let you do that."

you bend down to retrieve your bag from the couch, making a pit stop by the lamp to turn it off, "why not?" you question, meeting him at the door. he leans on it for support. "you do it for me all the time."

"exactly," he holds open the door for you as you make your way out into the hallway, as you walk several offices are lit up by the occupants inside, you can only hope that they are not in the same situation as the man next to you. "as your elder, i'm supposed to be taking care of you, not the other way around."

you scoff, rolling your eyes, "please, you know how many times i have had to take care of changbin after he gets sick because he ate too much? this is nothing new."

for the first time in 3 days a sound embodying the phrase ha ha ha escapes his lips. it's so hearty and abrupt that he has to stop walking. it brings a little smile to your face.

"what?" you groan, playing into it. "it's not funny! it was so annoying, i'm serious!" you latch onto his arm to continue dragging him out and into the lobby, nodding at the lady at the front desk as you pass, "he sounded like a baby with the way he was complaining."

"trust," he starts, regaining his breath, "i've had to deal with that before." he huffs and looks at you, then the giggles come back and you can't help but join him. it lasts until you get to the front doors of eMart.

before you can pass through the threshold a hand yanks you back. you look up to find chan already staring at you, an indescribable glint in his eyes. "yeah?"

it takes him a second to gather his thoughts, mouth opening and closing undecidedly. after a moment he finally finds his voice, hand gripping onto the sleeve of your jacket. "...thank you." he blinks and a stray tear falls, "it means a lot."

you can't help the watery smile that graces itself on your lips, the sudden affection throwing you off guard. you reach up and brush the tears from his face, using two fingers to turn the corner of his mouth upwards, "don't thank me. you always take care of us, someone has to take care of you."

you pull him towards the automatic doors, listening as the chime of the robotic voice welcomes you in. the sight of the noodles you were craving makes your stomach growl. "c'mon! i know what i want to get!"

even though this was supposed to be a break from making music, chan can't help the melody that repeats in his head as he watches you, still gripping onto his hand, drag him through the isles.

he knew he had to make something for you, as a token of appreciation.

A WEEK LATER⎯

it had been sometime since you had last been in the studio. all of the songs and planning for the comeback were completed and now you all were in the final stages, preparing for the promotions.

thankfully, today was your day off.

it had been raining nonstop, the water covering the streets and sidewalks like a blanket. even though it was 4 o'clock in the evening, clouds covered the sun making it seem more like 6.

it was perfect for a nap.

as you were getting into your bed your phone on the dresser vibrates and you grudgingly get up to retrieve it. you tap it once and the notification center pops up;

chanツ now

what would i do?.mp4

as soon as you open the message, a little confused, another text roles in.

a couple weeks ago i was going through a rough patch of overworking myself to the brink of exhaustion. i hadn't ate, bathe, or slept properly in days before. then you came and convinced me to take a break, to take care of myself. before you joined the group i was always worried about taking care of the others that i never took care of myself. you helped me realize that. i'm not trying to belittle the others for their self-awareness skills but you are the first in a long time to take care of me like that. and it had me thinking. what would i do without someone like you? and despite you telling me to take a break this came to mind and i couldn't stop myself. so y/n, this goes to you. thank you for taking care of me that night. i hope you know that i will always take care of you too.

love, bangchan.

and as you listen to the track you can't help the tears that follow.

thank you for reading <3

[soothinglee]

my new love language is booping people

#booping #its so cute #sorry to all my moots ♪(´ε｀ )

[soothinglee]

what would i do? (without someone like you) ──★ ˙🌱 ̟ ¡!

bangchan x ninth member! reader | 1.6k words✔︎

my notes⎯ i re-wrote this thing so many times i've lost count lol. i don't know if i'm satisfied with this because i couldn't convey the feeling as well as i wanted but i still like it! hope you enjoy! (also #bangchantakecareofyourself) warnings⎯ self neglect, reader taking care of bangchan. genre⎯ ninth member! au, angst, comfort, (heavily implied) self-neglect, platonic. songs⎯ what would i do?; strawberry guy

⎯catalog for skz✰ | ⎯ navigation✰ [requests are open]

"are you okay chan?"

the question lingers in the air for a hot second. it floats around until it hits the distracted ear of chan, who sits with his face resting on his chin, unmoving from his seat at the desk.

he blinks after a second, the fog slowly clearing from his eyes.

"huh?" his voice sounds distant as he resumes fiddling with the unfinished track.

you could tell that something was off in his demeanor. his postured was slouched, arms weak in their positions as he tries to fight off the sleep to continue working. you figured it had been a while since he had rest. you all were pre-paring for a comeback and with that comes a lot of work. new concepts, new looks, new songs. a high expectation bangchan finds himself fretting over due to the preconceived notions stays has on the upcoming album.

you've seen bangchan re-write a song 15 times because he thought stays wouldn't like one lyric. everyone, including you, has told him that he could only remove that one line, and keep the rest but he had the idea that everything has to flow together. which is why he's on take #16.

you give him a once over, your brows creasing. "i said are you okay?" he gives you a quick glance, his head bouncing as he goes back to his laptop, "how about you take a break?"

"can't."

a quiet sigh leaves your lips as you get up from the couch. the sky had darken as more time was spent in the studio, the only light source was the small table lamp in the far corner in the room. even then you could see just how much all of this was affecting him.

his eyes were sunken in, big purple-red like bruises encase them. he lifts up his hand to rub at the irritated skin. anyone could tell that he was exhausted.

your hands come up to rub out the kinks in his shoulders, "you're exhausted."

his body is defiant in letting him relax into your soothing touch, he hesitates for a second, letting the final moments of the massage sit in before he lightly shakes you off. "no time for sleep. i took a nap earlier, and i had a cup of coffee." he goes back to the track he was clipping.

an eyebrow raise, "how much earlier?"

this time he sighs and drops both hands. "y/n..."

"i'm just looking out for you. as the leader you have to take care of yourself, because if you aren't, then how do you expect to take care of us?" you know the question hits hard when you feel his body freeze underneath your hands. you stare at the back of his head, in the corner of your eye you see his shadow move a fraction and then his head drops. "you know that you don't have to be so hard on yourself," you take a moment to gauge his reaction, then a soft, "right?"

he releases a shaky breath, muttering.

you let your hands find the base of his neck, letting them go down to follow the path of his shoulder, willing the words from his throat. when you first joined stray kids, you were extremely nervous to the point where you couldn't speak, bangchan found that the movement worked well. you hoped it would work as well in your favor.

"i" he starts, his voice broken under the amount of stress resting on his chest, "yeah...i know."

you nod to yourself, a prideful smile on your lips, "okay then, why don't you take a break, let han or changbin finish it up in the morning," he goes to interject but you're quick to cut in, "and don't worry about putting this on them," taking the words from his mouth, "i'm sure they won't mind.

for the first time since he entered the studio, it's been almost 5 hours, he looks up at you and you can just see how much it's all affecting him, even down to the glassy look rising in his eyes.

he doesn't say anything but stare. he still looks hesitant. like at any moment he'll run off with the laptop and lock himself in a closet.

you stare back.

30 seconds, maybe a minute passes before a defeated look crosses over his face, letting his head drop onto your outstretched arm. wordlessly, he gives you one last look, then turns around to save the file, exit out of the software, and shuts down his computer.

"okay."

"okay?" you can't help the happiness that laces your tone.

"okay, i'll take a break, get some rest."

a squeal escapes your throat as you hold yourself back from celebrating, you honestly didn't think it was going to be as easy as it was. "i'm glad you're doing this, you need to give yourself some time to repair." you step back as he rises from the chair, holding on to his arm as he tries to return the feeling back to his legs, "how about you let me take care of you tonight? we can stop by the convenience store on the way home and pick up some snacks?"

chan immediately shakes his head, "i can't let you do that."

you bend down to retrieve your bag from the couch, making a pit stop by the lamp to turn it off, "why not?" you question, meeting him at the door. he leans on it for support. "you do it for me all the time."

"exactly," he holds open the door for you as you make your way out into the hallway, as you walk several offices are lit up by the occupants inside, you can only hope that they are not in the same situation as the man next to you. "as your elder, i'm supposed to be taking care of you, not the other way around."

you scoff, rolling your eyes, "please, you know how many times i have had to take care of changbin after he gets sick because he ate too much? this is nothing new."

for the first time in 3 days a sound embodying the phrase ha ha ha escapes his lips. it's so hearty and abrupt that he has to stop walking. it brings a little smile to your face.

"what?" you groan, playing into it. "it's not funny! it was so annoying, i'm serious!" you latch onto his arm to continue dragging him out and into the lobby, nodding at the lady at the front desk as you pass, "he sounded like a baby with the way he was complaining."

"trust," he starts, regaining his breath, "i've had to deal with that before." he huffs and looks at you, then the giggles come back and you can't help but join him. it lasts until you get to the front doors of eMart.

before you can pass through the threshold a hand yanks you back. you look up to find chan already staring at you, an indescribable glint in his eyes. "yeah?"

it takes him a second to gather his thoughts, mouth opening and closing undecidedly. after a moment he finally finds his voice, hand gripping onto the sleeve of your jacket. "...thank you." he blinks and a stray tear falls, "it means a lot."

you can't help the watery smile that graces itself on your lips, the sudden affection throwing you off guard. you reach up and brush the tears from his face, using two fingers to turn the corner of his mouth upwards, "don't thank me. you always take care of us, someone has to take care of you."

you pull him towards the automatic doors, listening as the chime of the robotic voice welcomes you in. the sight of the noodles you were craving makes your stomach growl. "c'mon! i know what i want to get!"

even though this was supposed to be a break from making music, chan can't help the melody that repeats in his head as he watches you, still gripping onto his hand, drag him through the isles.

he knew he had to make something for you, as a token of appreciation.

A WEEK LATER⎯

it had been sometime since you had last been in the studio. all of the songs and planning for the comeback were completed and now you all were in the final stages, preparing for the promotions.

thankfully, today was your day off.

it had been raining nonstop, the water covering the streets and sidewalks like a blanket. even though it was 4 o'clock in the evening, clouds covered the sun making it seem more like 6.

it was perfect for a nap.

as you were getting into your bed your phone on the dresser vibrates and you grudgingly get up to retrieve it. you tap it once and the notification center pops up;

chanツ now

what would i do?.mp4

as soon as you open the message, a little confused, another text roles in.

a couple weeks ago i was going through a rough patch of overworking myself to the brink of exhaustion. i hadn't ate, bathe, or slept properly in days before. then you came and convinced me to take a break, to take care of myself. before you joined the group i was always worried about taking care of the others that i never took care of myself. you helped me realize that. i'm not trying to belittle the others for their self-awareness skills but you are the first in a long time to take care of me like that. and it had me thinking. what would i do without someone like you? and despite you telling me to take a break this came to mind and i couldn't stop myself. so y/n, this goes to you. thank you for taking care of me that night. i hope you know that i will always take care of you too.

love, bangchan.

and as you listen to the track you can't help the tears that follow.

thank you for reading <3

#bangchan x reader #bangchan x you #bangchan x y/n #x reader #x y/n #x you #skz imagines #skz x reader #skz x y/n #skz fluff #skz x you #bangchan imagines #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #skz x ninth member! reader #ninth! member reader #bangchan fluff #bangchan angst #music based fic #skz ninth member

[soothinglee]

yall i just realized i’ve been writing on tumblr for 3 years. it legit doesn’t feel like it omg(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

[soothinglee]

P1HARMONY CONVOS AS PINTEREST TEXTS⏤✰

p1harmony x reader | 6 images✔︎

authors note ⎯ this will be a filler until i post this fic im planning on writing! i haven’t made anything in a while and my account is in a drought(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

warnings ⎯ cursing but thats about it

genre ⎯ crack

⎯ navigation✰

KEEHO + THEO ᯓ★

JIUNG + INTAK ᯓ★

SOUL + JONGSEOB ᯓ★

#p1harmony #p1harmony x reader #p1harmony smau #p1harmony texts #kpop #keeho #theo #jiung #intak #soul #jongseob #x reader #x y/n #x you #p1harmony fanfic

[soothinglee]

Lama and the children of Gaza holding a protest around a child martyred from famine because of the occupation.

[soothinglee]

YOU’RE TOO KINDε-(´∀｀; ) RIGHT BACK TO YOU<3

— first celeb, outfit, aesthetic and quote is your vibe !

thanks for the tag raven @taejaysmain <3

tagging @huhgfs @hoonvrs @hoonbby @redm4ri @girlhees @jungwonderz @jungkit @jaeyunverse @boyfhee @tyunni & anyone else who wants to! sorry if you alr did it too

[soothinglee]

aahhh ty for the tag moot !o(∩_∩)o

@catiuskaa @kangaracha @feelbokkie @astraystayyh and anyone else!!<3

— first celeb, outfit, aesthetic and quote is your vibe !

thanks for the tag raven @taejaysmain <3

tagging @huhgfs @hoonvrs @hoonbby @redm4ri @girlhees @jungwonderz @jungkit @jaeyunverse @boyfhee @tyunni & anyone else who wants to! sorry if you alr did it too

[soothinglee]

OKAY I JUST BOUGHT A P1HARMONY “STANDOUT” ALBUM AND I WAS LIKE “i would KILL for a jongseob pc.” AND I CANNOT BELIEVE MY LUCK😭

#p1h jongseob #p1harmony #standout #kpop #bg

[soothinglee]

a life eluded | l.mh, h.js

wc: 6.5k

genre: soulmate au; reincarnation au; fluff; angst; poly!minsung x reader

cw: pov hopping; anxiety/panic attack mentions; food/eating mentions; Bee (I still feel like they need a warning); all soulmates are gn (they/them pronouns) for sake of future storytelling; past life memories in italics; please please let me know if I missed anything🫶

if you’re new here, start from the beginning: a life forgotten

Soulmates can be a painful thing. You didn’t think you’d ever be able to stop yourself from running away. 

Riley had left you with a hug, two phone numbers hastily written on a paper towel, and a promise to meet up soon. You and Lia counted off ten minutes before leaving as well, hopefully giving you enough time for Riley and any possible companions to be long gone.

You thought the idea of reaching out to them would scare you, but the more you looked at the numbers, the more you wanted to talk to them. You assumed Bee was the one that had yelled at your soulmates, drawing their attention off you long enough to make a break for it. 

They’ve been looking for you for a long time.

Riley’s words found themselves on repeat in your head, not letting up even slightly. How could they have been looking for you if they’d never met you? They couldn’t possibly have known you. But they still noticed your absence. Enough that it weighed on them, caused them to seek you out even without knowing who you were.

They’ve been searching for their ‘missing piece’ about as long as I’ve known them.

Their missing piece. Not a burden, not a hitch in all of their plans, not some unforeseen unfortunate circumstance. You were included in their future long before you even knew of your past, they’d been attempting to seek you out for far longer than you’ve been avoiding ever finding them. In their minds you were the final piece of an extensive puzzle. Their final piece.

Before you could talk yourself out of it, you were typing both numbers into your phone and creating a group chat. 

Y/n: you didn’t tell me which number belonged to who so i just made a gc, I hope that’s alright.

Unknown Number: Who are you and how’d you get these numbers?

Unknown Number: shut up Bee, I already warned you about this. sorry Y/n, I was rushing a bit, this is Riley and the other number is Bee’s :)

Bee (Changbin’s soulmate): WAIT!!! YOU’RE MINSUNGS THIRD?! THE ONE THAT RAN AWAY EARLIER?!

Riley (Bang Chan’s soulmate): Bee istg

Y/n: uhhhh yeah, I suppose that’s me

Bee (Changbin’s soulmate): I would’ve run away too, those idiots are so loud

Riley (Bang Chan’s soulmate): you are actually not allowed to talk, I think the only person in existence that can rival Bin’s loud ass is you. the both of you together are my eternal migraine

Bee (Changbin’s soulmate): SHUT UP WE AREN’T THAT BAD

You couldn’t help the laugh that wells up in you at their banter, after that you fall into an easy rhythm talking with them. They understand you in a way you’re not sure any of your friends ever have. 

It didn’t take even two days messaging back and forth for the three of you to make plans to meet for coffee, Bee going on about how unfair it is that you met Riley already. You thought you’d be nervous, you spent the whole morning getting ready waiting for the nerves to hit. These were the soulmates of not just two international idols, but close friends to your soulmates who were in the same group. Everything about the situation should be sending you into a spiral of anxious thoughts, but instead you felt more at ease than you do going to dinner with Lia. 

“You look hot, where are you off to?” Your neighbor asked as you were locking the door.

“Coffee with some friends.” It felt too natural, the way friends rolled off your tongue. You hadn’t even met Bee yet.

“Be safe babes.” Your neighbor smiled, entering her own apartment. You weren’t close with your neighbor, but you always looked out for one another. Living alone wasn’t always safe, so having someone who would notice your absence was always a comfort thing for you.

The coffee shop decided on was a twenty minute walk from your apartment, you spent the whole time thinking over everything. When you had found out about your soulmates, one of your biggest concerns was the fact that there were others like you, soulmates of idols who knew who they were supposed to be with and couldn’t get to them. Or worse, that there were friends of yours, people who were the soulmates of the people you knew you had some cosmic bond with, people important to you that you’d never get the chance to remember. 

Due to Stray Kids popularity, you got to have your memories with your soulmates members, the memories of how close you were to each of them as well in every lifetime, but knowing they had soulmates, that you likely were very close to their soulmates, that you couldn’t remember them, devastated you.

And now you were meeting two of them for coffee. The memories with Riley had already started to slowly trickle in after the short time you spent with them in the bathroom, you knew more would start engraving within your deepest memories after more time spent together. The two of you were close in every lifetime, it gave you hope that everything would work out in this one as well.

“Y/n!! Run!!’” Riley laughed, hand holding tightly on yours as the two of you sprinted away from the lady chasing the two of you with a broom. 

“Get out of here, street rats!” The lady called after you. 

After several twists and turns to make certain you were securely away from any possible danger, you both sat against a wall to catch your breath. You started giggling, causing Riley to look at you as if you’d grown two heads. 

“What are you-?” Riley trailed off as you produced two small pieces of bread you’d managed to snake while Riley distracted the mean lady. Riley’s eyes lit up before laughter filled the space coming from the both of you.

You each enjoyed your pieces of bread, savoring the taste and the feeling of something on your stomachs, just sitting in comfortable silence with one another. 

You’d shared your whole lives running the streets, keeping each other alive and moving, and you always thought it’d just be the two of you, until Riley found Chan and your lives got thrown upside down.

You stared at the sign of the tiny rustic looking cafe. It was the type of place you’d go to every day if you knew it existed. Now that you did, you couldn’t imagine not regularly spending time there. You knew deep down, if all went well today, you’d be spending a lot of time there with Bee and Riley.

A bell jingled above the door as you pushed it open.The whole place radiated comfort and you felt at ease instantly.

“Welcome in, I’ll be right with you!” A cheery voice called from what you assumed to be the kitchen.

“Y/n! We’re over here.” You found a table in a small nook surrounded by books where Riley and Bee were sitting, drinks already ordered. “We didn’t know what you might like and Sage already knows our usuals, but we were waiting for you to get food.”

Before you could take one of the open seats between the two, a short person with a bright smile, freckles, and long hair brushed to a shine seemed to dance toward you, hands wiping at their apron, they reached one out for you to shake. 

“I’m Sage, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Their grip was firm despite the dainty tinkle of their voice.

“Y/n.” You smiled in return.

“What can I get ya, Y/n?” 

You order your drink, you, Riley, and Bee also putting in your orders for food, and just as fast as Sage had appeared, they’d disappeared back into the kitchen. Taking your seat at the little table, you took a deep breath before looking up, only to find Bee and Riley already staring at you.

“So like, when are you gonna finally meet your boys? OW! Fuck Riles, what was that for?!”

Riley pinned Bee with a pointed glare. 

“Are you avoiding your soulmates?” Sage asks, gently placing your cup in front of you and taking the last seat at the table.

You turn beat red at the accusation. “Not exactly.” You mumble.

“Totally is. They found each other young so they’ve had five years together already and now this one seems to think they’re going to ruin everything, even though Min and Ji already know about them and have been looking for them.” Bee stated, sipping out of their own cup. “OW! Fuck, why are you guys always attacking me!?” This time, Bee glared at Sage instead of Riley.

“Because you make yourself an easy target. Listen, Y/n, if there’s one thing I’ve learned while owning this shop and spending way too much time people watching, it’s that no matter how hard you try to fight it, you’re meant to be with who you’re meant to be with. That's just the reality. If you were going to ruin their lives just by them finding you, you wouldn’t be their soulmate. Simple as that. Min and Ji have been in here a few times with Chris and Bin, they’re good ones, I guarantee you could never regret letting them in.”

“Your parents made a good choice with your name.” 

Sage grinned, gently lifting one shoulder in a shrug. “It’s a fun name to live up to.”

With that, Sage disappeared into the kitchen once again. 

“They’re right though. I don’t think you could ever regret letting them in.” Riley smiled, reaching over to squeeze your hand.

“Sage doesn’t know the boys are idols, do they?”

The way they called all of them by names Riley or Bee would refer to them as instead of any full name or stage name struck you as odd. Either they didn’t know or they were the bands inner circle, that thought making a strange sense of insecurity rise up your throat.

“Nah, Sage doesn’t really do technology and only really listens to the radio their grandfather had is his restaurant. They know next to nothing about the idol world, which is why the boys like coming here so much, it’s peaceful and off the beaten path.”

You nodded, sipping your drink. You could understand that, especially with the boys being idols with soulmates, a quiet coffee shop with next to no attention on it is the perfect place to be able to have uninterrupted time together.

Shifting in your seat to look around the small shop more, you found yourself wondering what your soulmates thought of the cozy shop and its somewhat eccentric owner. What were their regular orders here? Did they like having a regular order or did they change it up? You found yourself wanting to know how they decorate their rooms, if they like to read, what they like to watch. You wanted to get to know your soulmates personally in this lifetime, not just what you know of them from every life passed.

A few weeks ago, a few days even perhaps, that would’ve terrified you. You would have found yourself thinking of Jisung and Minho, and these thoughts plenty, but you always shut it down knowing it was fruitless, you wouldn’t get the answers anyways. But now that was different, now they knew you, now they wanted to get to know you just like you wanted to get to know them. Now everything was different, and the two men you love of your memories have a chance to become the men of your present if you so chose. 

While losing yourself in the thoughts, zoning out the conversation happening between the shop owner and your fellow Stray Kids soulmates, your eyes landed on a gorgeous trellis made of wood and covered entirely of vines and flora, reminding you painfully of the arch and altar at your wedding to the two men in one of the very first lives you had a memory of.

“Do not fret, Y/n. No one is going to show up to ruin your marriage tonight, and even if one were to try I am almost positive Changbin and Bee would stop them before you even knew about it.” Sage smiled at you over your shoulder in the mirror, helping you lace up the back of your outfit. 

“My father disowned me because of this wedding, it isn’t entirely implausible for him to not try and put a stop to it.” You sighed, worrying your fingers.

Sage pulled the straps a notch tighter than they needed to go, causing you to yelp and stare at your friend incredulously. “None of that.” Was all that was muttered before you were released and spun around, Sage’s hands finding their way to your shoulders. “Now, you are going to get out there, you are going to marry both of your incredible soulmates, and you are going to let your very oafishly protective elders stop anyone who threatens a bond as beautiful as the one you share with Minho and Jisung. Do you understand me?”

All you could do was nod, tears already welling in your eyes, as you pulled Sage into a tight hug. “Thank you, my friend.” 

“Oh goodness, have the waterworks started already?” Bee teased, leaning casually on the doorframe. “You look great, Y/n. And if you’re ready, so is literally everyone else.”

Squeezing Sage one last time, you smoothed out the non-existent ruffles in your clothes before exiting the building, finding Chan holding a bouquet and waiting patiently leaning against the outside of the tiny cottage. When he looked at you, the emotions welling in his eyes were all you’d ever wanted to see from your father, and while a part of you wished he would have accepted your soulmates, you're more than grateful for Chan stepping up to such an important role.

“Are you ready?”

“More ready than I have ever been for anything.”

And with that, you were led out into the field, to the altar put together with wildflowers and plants, to your soulmates eagerly awaiting you to join them, to the life you’d never regret despite what your father anticipated. 

Because standing there under the floral arch, Jisung’s hand in one of yours and Minho’s in the other, you knew you could never regret them in anything for even a moment.

Minho watched as his lover paced incessantly back and forth in the cutie dorms living room. 

Bee and Riley had informed them that they were in touch with Y/n, their third soulmate, and that they were going out with you for lunch today. Riley refused to tell either boy where they were going, knowing Jisung would show up without hesitation and that Minho would just to avoid leaving Jisung alone in any way.

“What if they decide they don’t want us?” Jisung finally spoke the words that had been weighing on both boys since you disappeared a few nights prior, and even more so since finding out you’d been in touch with Changbin’s and Chan’s soulmates.

If you were in touch with the other soulmates, you could have found Minho and Jisung easily at any point. If you were in touch, one of them found you that night, which means you were likely mere feet from Jisung, as he had been with Riley. There were questions flying through Minho’s head at the same rate as he could see them in Jisungs eyes, but he had to remain calm for his lover, if they were to both spiral, no one would be able to calm Jisung.

“They’re not going to decide that, Sungie. They just found out they have two soulmates, you can’t tell me it didn’t take us a while to process that one too. They’ll find their way to us when they’re ready.” Minho pulled the smaller boy into his arms, pressing gentle kisses to the crown of his head.

“What if they’re never ready, Min?” The youngers voice was soft and shaky, Minho felt his heart break at the sound.

“We can’t think like that, Ji. Y/n is having lunch with two of our family at this very moment, if they were never going to be ready they wouldn’t have agreed to that.” Minho tried to ignore the shiver that ran up his spine at saying your name aloud for the first time in this lifetime, he tried to ignore the peace brought to him just by your name alone. His hold on Jisung tightening, his head burying in the youngers neck. “We’re going to be okay.” He promised, ignoring the persistent what ifs echoing in the back of his head.

What if Jisung was right? What if you were never ready? What if you never chose them because of who they are in this life? As much as Minho wanted to negate those thoughts, memories of lives that turned out exactly like that made him question if this would be one of them. 

His hand tightened around their wrist, trying to pull them back to him. “Why do you keep running away?!”

“Because I have to!” You cried, finally turning to Minho, your eyes glassy with unshed tears. “I have to.” Your voice breaking on every word.

“You don’t have to. You can stay with me, we can figure it out.”

“Figure what out? Minho, soulmates are not the end all be all. As much as I would love to just run to you, run away from everything but you, I have responsibilities. I can’t just do what I want, not in this lifetime. We’ve found each other, awesome, great, we’re still in two completely different worlds. You’d be better off trying to find the one missing from our memories, you’d have a chance to have a life with them, to be happy with them. Do that Minho. Find our third soulmate, forget about me, and be happy. Because I can never be, that’s just not how this life played out for me.”

“You’re telling me that despite everything, you’re not choosing me?”

“God why do you have such selective hearing?! I don’t get a choice Minho. I never did! I was born into the fucking mafia, people don’t get to just walk away from that simply because they found their soulmate. 

“Soulmates are a weakness just waiting to be exploited, you’ll live your whole life constantly looking over your shoulder, constantly in danger, because of me. Is that really what you want for yourself? For whoever we’re missing? Is that the life you’d choose for someone else? Because I wouldn’t choose this life for anyone and I am begging you to leave Minho. Get out while no one knows, get out while there’s no chance for them to know.”

“But I’ll know.” He hated how broken his voice sounded even to his own ears. “And you’ll know.”

Your eyes searched his, looking for any sign that he would listen to you, that he’d walk away and never look back. But all you found was a horrifying sense of finality.

Minho wanted to take it away, let you be free of this world you were forced into. He wanted to take your hand in his and never let go, no matter the danger that came with it. 

He watched as your face morphed from the helpless near tears girl into a cold and emotionless woman, and it terrified him that you had been forced to learn to shed all resemblance of emotion within a blink. 

“I will not ever choose you over my family in this lifetime, Lee Minho. Your life isn’t of importance to me and if you’re so keen to get yourself murdered trying to talk me into leaving with you, then so be it. I won’t come to your rescue.” Saying the words felt like driving a knife right into your own heart and twisting, the look on his face as his grip loosened on your wrist only adding to the immense guilt. 

Ripping your arm away from his grasp, you turned on your heel, head held high, tears threatening your lashes, and left him standing there.

Jisung felt like he couldn’t breathe. All he could do was pace around like a lunatic, and every now and again stop to stare at his hands. The hands that held you, the hands that let you go.

Every time he closed his eyes, he could see the way your eyes lit up, the way your smile outshines every star and sunrise he’d ever witnessed. He could hear the perfect harmony of you and Minho singing together, the way you didn’t miss a single syllable in any of his rap parts.

Jisung thought finding you would bring him peace, completeness, the sense of warmth he already knew with Minho, and for those few minutes he had you, you did. 

Now, Jisung figured just knowing you were nearby, knowing you were close enough that maybe he would run into you again would ease the pain in his chest at the memories flashing through his mind, but when Riley informed him that they were on their way to get lunch with Bee, and you, and refusing to tell him where they were going, he felt his heart shatter all over again. His breathing growing uneven at the idea of you being close enough to enjoy lunch with two of his closest friends, and yet nowhere near him. 

So Jisung paced. He walked back and forth and back again until he was dizzy, trying to rid his body of a pent up energy he had no idea what to do with. If he stopped, he assumed he’d collapse into a full blown panic attack, if that were to happen Minho would have to calm him down, and if Minho has to focus on keeping Jisung level headed, he won’t be able to grieve your absence too. 

Jisung knew he was spiraling, knew he wouldn’t be able to bring himself out of it this time, but he had to pretend he was okay, he had to let Minho spiral if he needed to, which means he can’t. 

He tried to distract himself. He thought of Minho, of the way he curls into him in his sleep. How Minho nudges his hand, silently begging him to keep scratching his scalp when Jisung gets distracted and stops for any longer than five seconds. The memories of how the late afternoon light filters across Minho’s features, making him look like one of those beautiful paintings Hyunjin talks their ears off about. 

But within these thoughts of his incredible soulmate, flitters in you. The way you had a habit of playing with Jisungs hands, he wondered if you’d still do that in this lifetime. He fell into thinking of the way you would stick your tongue out and furrow your brows when you focused too hard on anything, from washing dishes to sewing up a stab wound. He wondered why he had memories of you sewing up stab wounds, and which lives those were from, what you were like in those lifetimes outside the flits of memories he was gifted from the short amount of time he got to be by your side in this one.  

No matter how hard he tried, everything kept coming back to you. Trying to distract himself by thinking of his other soulmate would lead to memories of him coming home to find both of you curled up together, fragments of time stilled in his mind of the two of you, smiling at each other, at him. He knew he would lose his mind if he were to be forced to remember you in every single way and never get to experience any of it outside of those few minutes he had on the street.

“You shouldn’t have come here.”

Your voice was like a melody to his ears, despite the harsh words echoing from it. 

“Maybe you shouldn’t be here.” He countered.

Despite the racing of his heart, the familiarity of you, he had a job. One that required getting through you at any cost. 

“Whatever it is you were sent here for, think very hard, is it worth the cost of your life?”

Jisung didn’t really put a cost on his life. He was raised and trained for one thing only, to carry out orders by any means necessary. And, as if you could sense that in him, you shifted your relaxed stance just slightly, preparing for an attack, but softened your features. 

“There is more to life than what you know, little one.”

At the nickname, he lunged, but it was as if you knew exactly what to expect, perrying and gently placing your hand on his arm, sending the both of you headlong into forgotten memories and lives. 

Coming to, Jisungs guard flew up. He didn’t move, didn’t attempt to attack you, but he shut down every possible emotion you could try to gather from him.

“I can show you a better world. One where you’d be in control of your own life, where you’d have an answer to what is and isn’t worth the cost of it.” 

Your words were gentle, everything about you seemed to be gentle. You softened your stance, returning to the relaxed position, no longer planning to attack him or counter any attacks from him.

“If you give me a chance, I could give you the world.”

“I think I want to meet them.”

Riley shot up from their position sprawled across your couch, Bee’s mouth dropping open in shock. 

“Are you serious?” Riley asked, searching your face for any sense of unease or dishonesty.

You’d been spending endless hours with the two, they’d quickly become your closest friends, aside from Lia. You’d also come to spend a lot of time at Sage’s cafe, quickly learning they are very much a piece of your many lives as well. You were still unsure of how exactly Sage fit into the grand puzzle of lifetimes spent with the same friend group, but you knew they did. Your suspicions only confirmed with Riley and Bee’s agreeance of having Sage within their past lives memories as well.

“Y/n/n, I need you to be so for fucking real right now, do you actually want to meet them?”

You’d seen Bee get serious about stuff before, they weren’t all jokes all the time, but the way they were staring at you at that moment, you knew you had to give the complete honest truth. Bee was protective, and while that insane protective streak has since expanded to you as well, you knew without a shadow of a doubt they’d evescrate you before you had a chance to even think about hurting Minho or Jisung.

“I’m terrified of it, that hasn’t changed. But maybe you’re right, maybe it will work out.” You smile at your friends. “I think I’m ready to risk finding out.”

It didn’t take even twenty whole minutes to get a meeting set up, Riley and Bee dragging you to your room to get you dressed and ready. 

“Is it really a good idea to do this now? I mean, it’s really fast, don’t they want time to like, I don’t know, prepare or something?” You’d been rambling the whole time Bee sat on your lap to hold you in place while fixing your hair. 

“No. Because ‘giving them time’ only gives you time to back out and the last thing we need right now is Ji going into another spiral because he thinks you don’t want them.” You could practically hear the roll of Bee’s eyes as they finally got off you, surveying their handiwork. 

Huffing, you accept your fate as Riley forces an outfit into your arms and shoves you into your bathroom, pulling the door shut.

After getting changed and taking in your appearance, you had to admit, Bee and Riley were good. You’d looked hot, almost to the point of it feeling like it was too much. Taking a deep breath and hyping yourself up in the mirror, you open the door to find Bee and Riley lounging in the hallway, both looking up upon hearing the door open, Riley grinning and Bee letting out a piercing whistle as they take you in, high fiving.

“You’re gonna knock 'em dead, babe.” Bee winked.

You blushed, but couldn’t help the smile stretching across your lips.

“Alright then, let’s do this.”

Not every life went smoothly, not every meeting was practically gold and rainbows. But this one was. Childhood friends and also soulmates is nearly unheard of, most people couldn’t fathom growing up with the memories of every life before the current. But you had met Minho and Jisung at the ripe age of five, Jisung was the baker's son, your mom was looking for work, and you and Jisung were forced to spend hours upon hours every day together.

At first neither of you really understood the full depth of your shared connection, but when you both met Minho, and shared all the same memories with him as well, your young minds didn’t have it in them to care. 

Growing up, the three of you would learn the full extent of what happened, but you never had the disconnect from the memories, having your past lives almost completely integrated with your current. 

“I wish we could find each other young in every lifetime. It made everything so much easier.” Jisung muttered into your hair. You hummed in contented agreement, fingers massaging Minho’s scalp.

“Unfortunately, that’s not gonna be the case Sungie. Some lives will be easier, some will be harder, there may even be some we never meet at all. But at least in this one, we’ll get to love each other for far longer than we went without.” Despite his words, Minho’s voice was a purr and you knew without a doubt that all three of you, whilst scared of what future lives may entail, were perfectly at peace in that one. 

Riley and Bee had never spent so much time away from the boys. 

From the very moment Changbin found Bee, they were a permanent fixture within the group. Bee helped 3Racha write and produce, they were in the studio almost as much as the group, and if they weren’t there, they weren’t far.

Riley, from the moment of finally accepting Chan at least, was never far either. They would always be around, making sure all of the boys were eating, weren’t overworking themselves, taking in enough fluids. 

To put it lightly, the gap of their absences was almost painfully noticeable in the weeks they seemed to all but vanish. Ever since their lunch with Y/n, it’s been as if the two were ghosts in the skz household. 

Jisung knew they were still around, the lack of moping from either of his fellow producers was proof enough, but he hadn’t seen a glimpse of them for days, maybe even weeks. 

He felt as if his world was fracturing. Minho was working tirelessly on new choreography, Bee wasn’t around to help him with songs, Riley wasn’t around to make sure he was drinking water, all of his members were enjoying their break before the next comeback, and he was exhausted. Jisung didn’t know how to get out of his head, and he wasn’t sure who to ask for help from. 

He knew if he kept the pace he was at, he’d inevitably spiral, and that wouldn’t be any good for anyone. Jisung had decided to hide away in his room and sleep, it was the best answer he could come up with, but just as sleep was threatening to finally overtake him, his door burst open, a downright giddy Changbin standing in the threshold.

“I’m about to take a nap, tell me about it later.” Jisung groaned, turning his back to his friend before his friend could say anything.

Changbin, not having any of it, stomped over and ripped the blankets away from the smaller boy, lifting him out of bed, carrying Jisung to the bathroom, despite his protests, and threw him in the shower.

Before Jisung could complain, yell, or even get a thought in, Changbin turned the water on, drenching him in seconds. 

“Y/n wants to meet, get cleaned up and ready to go in ten.” The older boy said before leaving the bathroom, closing the door behind him, and leaving an absolutely dumbfounded Jisung to slowly register the words, excitement growing with his understanding. 

````

Weeks. Minho had been trying to get the choreography for the next comebacks title track down for weeks. Everything he came up with didn’t feel right, and when it did he didn’t think it looked right. 

Hyunjin and Yongbok had offered to help, they’d even stayed with him, learning new dances, so Minho could see how it looked with multiple people, for a fresh perspective. But nothing was right. No matter how much Yongbok would swear he thought it flowed well, no matter how easy Hyunjin picked it up, nothing was right. 

Minho knew, deep down, it wasn’t the dances that were off, it wasn’t his choreography at all. He knew it was nothing to do with anything related to music that was wrong, but the only thing he could translate the misconstrued emotions to was dance. 

He created new dances every day to give his body and mind something to do, something to take away the wandering thoughts and memories. He’d rather tire himself to exhaustion than remember how it felt to have you by his side. 

Minho had come to the conclusion that you were not going to choose them, and he couldn’t blame you for it at all. His hopes were up after he’d seen his only hyung work things out with his soulmate, but not everyone could find it in themselves to be with an idol. Being an idol was hard enough, dating one was a whole other demon of its own. 

Despite knowing he has Jisung, despite being overwhelmingly worried about his lover, Minho simply needed to mourn the lover they never had a chance with. He needed his time to accept the fates cruelty upon their lives this time around, and then he’d help Jisung accept it as well. 

So he kept dancing. For weeks.

Minho had always found solitude in an empty dance studio. The way the mirrors would be completely empty save for his figure, the silence filling a typically boisterous room, there was just something peaceful about a place meant to be filled being empty.

He was stretching, preparing for hours of working out kinks in his newest routine completely unbothered. He wasn’t even supposed to be there. They were on break, all of the boys were off doing who knows what, and they were supposed to be relaxing leading up to their busy season. Yet Minho was in the empty dance studio, all by himself. 

He was lost in thoughts, already hacking away at the parts he wanted to rework, mentally trying to decipher how to fix them, when the door to the studio was nudged open. His eyes shifted to the door in the mirror, finding his only hyung standing in the doorway, a small smile gracing his features. 

“You might want to put your plans for the day on hold.” Chan said without even greeting him. 

“Why’s that?” Minho asked, being unable to stop the quirk of his brow. 

“Because we have lunch plans. Are you sweaty?” 

Minho shook his head, “Just got here, I was stretching.”

“Great, put on street shoes and let’s get out of here, we’ve gotta meet Bin and Ji at the dorms.” Chan smiled, moving to grab Minho’s bag for him. 

“What’s the rush?” Jisung hadn’t mentioned any lunch plans with the other producers, but to be fair he and Jisung had been somewhat distant from one another lately.

“It’s a soulmate lunch. Me and Riles, Bin and Beebee, you and your soulmates.”

Minho nodded his agreement, very used to soulmate lunches, working on lacing his street shoes when he froze in realization. 

Him and his soulmates.

````

To say you were nervous would be a gross understatement. You were downright jittery.

Bee and Riley were positioned on either side of you, both steadfast pillars of comfort bringing an almost overwhelming sense of security. You would be okay, because how could you not be with them by your side?

You’d agreed to meet at Sage's cafe for lunch, it was mutual ground and low foot traffic. Perfect for essentially a first meeting with your two idol soulmates and, from your understanding, Bee and Riley’s idol soulmates as well. 

You were ready to bolt. Ready to full on leg it home and lock your door, never to come out again. Despite the peace of knowing three of your closest friends would be there, meeting them was still an absolutely terrifying concept.

The what ifs a plague playing on repeat. What if they don’t like you? What if you ruin everything for them? What if their fans find out? What if, what if, what if. 

But with every bad what if, there was also a good one. What if you fit in seamlessly? What if they don’t care about their fans finding out? What if they are as scared and excited to finally meet you as you are to meet them? What if, what if, what if.

You knew you could bolt. You knew that Bee and Riley talked big, but if push came to shove and you needed an out, they’d have your back and get you out. You knew you could turn on your heel and walk the opposite way and they’d text their soulmates an update, and that yours would more than likely be devastated.

It was the fact that you could that kept you from doing so. The idea of Jisung and Minho waiting for you, the mental image of them deflating after hearing you’d change your mind, the thought of them being upset due to your actions, pushed you forward, kept you walking, and you knew no matter what you walked in on, you wouldn’t be able to back out now. You wouldn’t be the one to break the loves of your every lifetime. 

Seeing the familiar shop, your heart was in your throat. There would be no turning back, no changing your mind. In choosing to meet them, you chose to give them the ball, everything would be up to them, and the closer you got to the cozy shop, the more you realized you were truly okay with that.

You were never actually nervous about meeting your soulmates, you were giddy about it. 

As you pushed the door open, letting the familiar sound of its little bell notify Sage of your arrival, your eyes found your soulmates in record time, both sat at the table under the trellis covered in flora and vines. Your breath caught at the smiles gracing both of their faces, and you knew.

Even though soulmates can be a painful thing, you didn’t think you’d ever be able to run away from yours again. 

a/n: ahhhhh it’s almost overrrr😭🥺🥺 this was gonna be a lot angstier and then it just, wasn’t. and idk what that’s all about but I like how it turned out lol. I dragged my feet on writing this part for actual weeks and then wrote like, 5k of it in two days, so I hope it was good haha! thank you so so much for reading, please let me know your thoughts!!🫶🫶🫶

taglist: @starlostastronaut @mariteez @tired-of-life-86 @skizmee @elisiexoxo @cutiespaghetti @httpswilloww @sundownimup-1 @lolareadsimagines @rockstrhanji @quokkampi @kayleefriedchicken @vivirantshere @ciellebys

#my heart hurts(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) #this is so beautiful #jisung x reader x lee know

[soothinglee]

now it’s different; i am the one inlove...

jeongin x reader | 3.3k✔︎ | mainly his point of view.

my notes⎯ whew. this is the longest fic i've ever posted and i can't lie and say it wasn't a pain. originally i got this idea from listening to "morning dew" like 100 times and thought it would be perfect to write something for i.n.

warnings⎯ somewhat angsty, poor writing, some cursing, doubts, and humorous dialogue (so sorry if you dont find me funny).

genre⎯ eventual friends to lover, angst.

songs⎯ morning dew; xavier wulf | a new kind of love; frou frou

⎯catalog for skz✰ | requests r open

12.03.23 | 4:04 p.m;

it had been ten minutes since you left jeongins’ side to aid seungmin in teasing changbin. the frigid weather turning your breaths to smoky clouds as you laugh at one another.

jeongin rests in his spot on the park bench, if you ask, he’ll simply say he cannot join in on the fun due to the stiffness in his joints, and not the fact that an unwavering feeling of jealousy is creeping through his bones like wildfire.

he can’t help but narrow his eyes at the skinship you give felix, reaching up to brush the snowflakes out of his bangs, threading your fingers in his when you spot a squirrel resting in a tree; dragging him towards the spot before the rodent runs off.

jeongin hates physical touch with a burning passion. there would never not be a time where he didn’t push one of his hyungs off of him. he didn’t like when bangchan would suprise back hug him, or when hyunjin would randomly sit in his lap and pester him.

yet when he looks at the way you interact with the other members, he cant help but wonder what it would feel like with his hands in yours. running around the white colored park, throwing snow at eachothers faces, trying not to slip on the ice while playing tag with everyone else.

you weren't shy to affection, jeongin knew that for a fact. so there wasn't any real reason for him to be scared to go up to you and initiate a hug or a hand hold. but the overwhelming feeling he's been trying to hide for the last two years is holding him back.

yang jeongin has the biggest crush on you. he just wont admit it.

all the other members can see it clear as day, they don't hesitate to tease him about it when you aren't around; sometimes they do it infront of you but they are somewhat discreet about it.

"you're staring again." a muffle voice comments beside him. jeongin flinches at the sudden sound, he had been sitting by himself silently for a little longer than he had expected. "keep it up and she'll think you're a creep."

jeongin raises up his fist towards hyunjins face to which the man backs away quickly, "shut it." he threatens, he turns his attention back towards you, watching you get a piggyback ride through the snow by bangchan. he holds back a scoff.

hyunjin shrugs, readjusting his scarf around his face. the tip of his nose peeks through the fabric, it's color matches his ears; dusted a cherry red, "i'm not lying. even just watching you watch her is making me uncomfortable," he shivers to further his point, jeongin lightly shoves him. "i don't know why you wont just tell her."

jeongin feels his blood run cold contrast to the heat in his cheeks. he gives a quick glance towards hyunjin who watches him expectantly. "i don't know what you're talking about." he mumbles, adjusting his body on the wooden bench. he's been sitting for so long that his butt is growing numb.

"i.n-ah!"

"what?" he says, "i don't have any feelings for her, i'm only just looking. it's not illegal or did the laws suddenly change?"

jeongin swivels his head exasperatedly to look at hyunjin only to find him staring back with a wide grin. jeongin raises an eyebrow.

after a moment of staring, hyunjin lightly murmurs, "i never said anything about having a crush on her." his grin widens.

in that moment panic flushes through jeongins body and he's quick to clamp a hand over hyunjins mouth. "shut up. shut up dude."

"YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON Y/N." hyunjins voice comes out muffled underneath jeongins glove but he can still hear it very clearly. he just hopes no one else (more specifically you) hears it aswell.

"you liar, i do not! hyung, please stop screaming, i swear-!"

"you guys alright?" a third voice pipes up. both of them turn and see you standing a couple inches away, bare hands shoved in pockets looking like a swaddled marshmallow. you were covered head to toe in snow, proof of the snowball fight you had with felix lingered on your clothing. the apples of your cheeks moved with every sniff you took and jeongin couldn't help but mentally compare you to a bunny.

he immediately released hyunjin, who stayed in his backed up postion grinning at him. "yeah." he cringes at the way his voice cracked out of nerves, or the way his palms started to sweat despite the cold.

"are you sure?" you question, looking at hyunjin then back at him, "i thought i heard a scream."

"no-"

"-you did." hyunjin interjects, slapping a hand on jeongins back. his body jostles forward at the contact. "but it was nothing, right i.n? just some light teasing."

jeongin grunts through his teeth, "yeah. harmless."

you nod, unsure that it's the whole truth, "okay..." you point behind you, gesturing over towards the disfigured snow man whose bottom half lay smaller than its top, it's eyes on opposite sides of its face. "well if you're sure...i'll just go back."

before you can fully turn around, two heavy hands place itself on your shoulders to halt your movements, "no, you should stay and take a break. you've been moving around a lot. i'll finish your snowman with changbin."

you look at hyunjin, eyebrows scrunched together, "are you sure? you don't need to do that, we're almost finished anyway-."

hyunjin looks towards the figure and back towards you, "-no the hell you aren't. don't worry," he reassures, taking a deep breath. you can almost see the captains hat form on his head. "leave it to the artist."

he gives you a light push towards the empty spot next to jeongin, his butt print out lined in the snow on the seat. he turns around and calls out to changbin, "yah! it looks like shit! let me take over!"

"eh? you don't know jack about making a snowman!"

"i know more than you do, genius!" his voice fades away as his stumbles down the hill and towards a grumpy changbin.

you can't help but let out a giggle at the twos bickering. "something is wrong with them."

jeongin tries to nod in agreement but finds himself frozen.

at the lack of a response you turn towards him and see him tense in his spot, "are you okay?" concern drips from your voice as you lean towards him.

he hums quietly, giving you a brief glance and then returning his attention to hyunjin kicking over the snowman. "'m good."

you only nod and face forward.

a couple minutes go by as nothing else is exchanged. your hands begin to freeze due to the lack of heat to your fingers. you pull them out to send a few frosty puffs of air to at least try to heat them up but it doesn't work; you can practically see the icicles grow from your nails.

"it's so cold." you comment, rubbing your hands together.

jeongin perks up at your voice instantly, looking over at the way your shoulders shiver and the weak attempt at warming yourself up. before he even realizes it, he's pulling off his own mittens. "where are your gloves?" he questions, no hints of mockery in his croaky voice.

"gave them to han." you comment, smiling softly, "lee know took his when they were fighting and he wouldn't stop whining about how he was going to have to get his fingers amputated, so i gave him mines."

jeongin can't help the smile making its way to his face at your selflessness. you were always like that, worrying about others before yourself. it was admirable but he wishes you didn't do it as much.

"what about your hands?" he questions, holding out his own pair to you. you kindly reject his offer, pushing away his hands as he tries to force them onto yours.

"what about them?" you retort, "i was keeping them busy, with all the movement it gave me enough warmth."

he can't help but roll his eyes. he gives one last attempt at taking your hands and lets out a little cheer when you relent and give them up. jeongin feels his eyes widen as he looks at the purple color nipping at your fingers, sure you'll get frostbite later. he quickly slides on the wool gloves (much faster than he would've liked- it would've been nice to hold your hands a little longer) and watches satisfied when you lean back on the bench with a relaxed sigh.

with your eyes closed, basking in the new warmth, the feeling of the snowflakes hit the bridge of your nose tickles as you try to brush them off. you can't help the childish giggles that escape you as you scrunch your nose in retaliation.

and jeongin can't help but watch.

all he wanted to do was deny, deny, deny his feelings for you.

he didn't want to complicate the relationship you had built up since you joined the group. he was the first person you talked to, he saw how anxious you were and did everything he could to make you feel comfortable, despite the fact that he was relatively new too and couldn't do much.

sure you were close with all the other members, but you and jeongin had a connection. something deep down that made your tummy hum and your head feel cloudy. every time he was near you he felt- cheesy enough- complete.

jeongin doesn't like you like that.

he couldn't.

"just friends." he thinks, watching as you turn to him with a smile that makes his heart hurt. "just friends."

12.05.23 | 8:23 p.m;

it had been a couple days since you all went to the park and you can already feel the sickness creeping up your throat.

most of the tea in the house was gone due to the other 8 contracting colds left and right. so when you go into the cabinet to make you another fix it wasn’t surprise to see that the options were limited.

what was surprising was that your chamomile tea, which you bought for yourself only (and jeongin) was sat empty on the shelf.

“son of a-.” you start, turning back towards the rooms lined the hallway, “which one of you bitches drank my tea?”

“me, sorry,” a voice echoes down the hall, “i ran out of mine and yours was the only one that looked good.”

jisung.

“i lend you my gloves and this is how you repay me?” you shout back, opting for some black tea instead, turning on the stove. “just for that you have to do my chores for the next week!”

it’s silent for a concerning second, and then a loud, throaty cough, “girl, fuck you!”

before you could spit out a long winded response, full of curse words you didn’t even know could be strung together, a gentle hand was placed on your back.

“you need to relax, you’ll raise your blood pressure, grandma.”

you turn around and see jeongin standing there with a mask around his face. he’s clad in a matching tracksuit, it was a size too big so it hung off his shoulders, allowing you to see the tank strap he had on underneath.

good lord.

“i’m legit only a couple months older than you.” you retort, pointing a wooden spoon at his face, “not too much on me.”

he laughs and raises his hands in defense, “i apologize.” he does you a favor and starts to put water in the kettle, “if it’s really that serious, i could just go out and get more for you. you don’t have to kill han over it.”

you watch as he places the kettle on the stove and ignites the burner, “i would be doing lee know a favor.”

he laughs again and allows you to take over. “plus you’re sick too.” you add, watching steam slowly blow out of the hole, “i don’t want you to go out and take care of me when you’re in the same state. that ain’t right.”

jeongin says nothing for a moment, trying to find the right words to say. he doesn’t want to lay out all his cards on the table, his confession riddle with coughs and pit stops to wipe his nose. but he wants to say that he doesn’t care that’s he’s sick. that he’ll go back to a few days ago and give you the coat off his back if you asked.

to be honest, just like the gloves, you wouldn’t have to.

he’ll willingly give you anything. even the world if you truly wanted it.

ugh, cheesy.

he pulls out his phone and leans against the counter next to you, "if you wont let me get it, i'll just doordash it."

you perk up, "you can doordash tea?"

jeongin nods and grins, facing the app towards you were the jewel-osco section is pulled up, "uh-yeah? you didn't know that?"

you scoff, "no? i'm not a online food delivery freak like the rest of you."

"you say that until you're asking me to order you some take out at like one in the morning."

you roll your eyes and push him out the way jokingly. the kettle begin to whistle like felix trying to hit a high note and you pour the hot water into the mug. "watch it." you pull down another cup from the cabinet, "and please don't spend your money on me. save it for something better."

jeongin raises an eyebrow, "like what? more clothes?" he jokes, clicking place order. "it's fine. i like buying things for you. even if its something small." small was definitely not the right word after he just spent 10 dollars on a tiny box of packets.

you can't help the heat that rises to your cheeks and turn your back to him, finding sudden interest in the tea in front of you. "i'll pay you back later."

"no need." he says, voice coming out softer than he intended, "like i said, i like buying stuff for you." he watches as your hands pause putting the sachets in the mugs and takes over, "i got it."

you have to force the thank you out of your throat as you stare up at him. maybe its because you're sick, but the lightheaded feeling becomes intense and you have to grip the sides of the counter to stabilize yourself. you watch as his hands move with ease, adding the sugar, then the honey to each respective mug.

he says nothing more, but he doesn't need to really say anything. the intense look on his face voices his thoughts a lot more than he wanted to let on, just like a few days ago. something was on his mind, he just wasn't saying what.

"are you okay?" you ask gently, laying a hesitant hand on his mid-back. you can feel him tense underneath your touch for a spilt second and then his body relaxes. he looks towards you quickly, giving a stiff smile. he pushes the finished tea towards you, your hands incase the hot cup before the liquid can spill over.

"mhm." his fingers dance over the rim of his drink, "why wouldn't i be?"

"i dunno." you reply, "you just look...overwhelmed."

"well, i am sick." he smirks, pulling down his mask to his chin, "everything is a little overwhelmed right now."

you shove him lightly, careful of the cup in his hands, "you know that's not what i mean!" he laughs, "but...you do know you can talk to me right? like, you know i wont judge, right?"

he knows that, in a million years, that you were never critical to his feelings. for as long as he could remember the two of you were going to each other for problems that you couldn't solve alone. but this was a different feeling. and if he were to tell you, he could be ruining a relationship that took a long time to build up. why ruin that rapport for something like a silly crush?

but he couldn't help but wonder if you felt the same? there had been many times where some of the other boys said that you felt the same, even though it wasn't there business to get involved (they do not care). but jeongin knew how they could be. spreading misinterpreted lies to egg on something that most likely isn't true in the first place. they had a tendency to mix up words so why would now be any different?

he's spent all of this time convincing himself that what he felt for you wasn't crush like behaviors. just a good friend looking out for another.

but friends dont get jealous when the other holds another's hand. friends dont get jealous when the other gives another more attention. friends dont have the urge to take them on dates, or have their contact be more than platonic, or to kiss the other.

maybe hyunjin has a point, maybe he does like you.

jeongin feels that if his heart continues on like this, it could stop at any moment. "death by seemingly unrequited love." would look hella embarrassing on his tombstone.

out of all the situation he has been alone with you, why did his heart and mind choose now to tell you? maybe it's the sickness making him vulnerable but he feels a rush of confidence surge through his veins.

"actually," he starts, a nervous shake rattles his vocal cords. he refuses to make eye contact with you, finding interest in his scorching hot cup, "there is something i need to tell you."

you posture immediately straightens and you place down your mug, giving him your undivided attention. usually he loves it, now its burdensome, "oh? what is it?"

the tea shakes under his hold and he mentally curses it for exposing his fear. he wants to do it so bad, it'll be okay, he tries to convince himself. just let it out.

"i've been trying to convince myself for a while that what i feel isn't true but i think i should tell you now."

you nod, urging him to go on.

he takes a deep breath, he isn't trying to stall but the way his insides buckle is making it hard to find the words.

he started it, now he just has to finish.

"y/n, I...," he pauses, "y/n I lik-" before he can get it out there's a big crash coming from down the hall. heavy footsteps stop at the kitchens entrance and lee know stands there covered in bubbles.

"what the hell happened?" you comment, rushing over to him while holding back a laugh. he looks like the pillsbury dough boy standing there eagle spread.

lee know coughs and you swear you see several suds fly from his mouth. "seungmin. i'll kill him, i swear i will."

you let out a laugh and brush the soap from his shoulders. it takes you a second to remember but when you do you turn back around to look at jeongin, "i'm so sorry what were you saying?" you start to say only to find the tea he was drinking abandoned on the counter.

"jeongin?"

jeongin barely hears you call out his name as he rushes down the hall and towards his room. he can't help the tears that brim in his eyes and he starts to feel pathetic wiping them away.

what the hell was he thinking? admitting he liked you was hard enough on himself, so why did he think admitting it to you was a good idea?

as he sits on his bed, he can't help but feel a piece of him gone. you most likely didn't know where he was getting at, you didn't know that he was confessing to you in that moment. but the embarrassment of him understanding his words were worse. there was no way he could face you after that. for his own dignity.

as he cries he can't help but think;

it's always different, i am the one in love.

part 2?