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screeching-bunny · 1 year

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Yandere! Priests Hcs

Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Possessive Behavior, Reader is Referred as ‘You’

🌟 Yandere! Priest is a very devoted lover. He makes sure that all your needs are whether they be external or internal things. Cares more about your life then his own and is willing to sacrifice anything for you. He makes sure to follow any request that you have for him and is even willing to act as your pet if you ever wanted him to.

🌟 Yandere! Priest gave up his religion in order to worship you. You are the reason for living without you, he would be nothing. Everyday he wakes up is for you. You are his sunshine, his beacon of light, and his God. It would be wrong for him not to devote every second of his life to you. Why would he not? You definitely deserve all of it.

🌟 Yandere! Priest is very easy to manipulate due to his willingness to follow your every command. That however, does not make him any less dangerous though. He has many connections and is friends with almost every powerful person in the world. If he ever needed to he would ask them for help in getting rid of certain matters.

🌟 Yandere! Priest is a bit of a germaphobe and would constantly come over to your room to clean it. Washes all your clothes for you and basically does all the household chores. With him by your side, you can basically rot in bed all day.

🌟 Yandere! Priest would probably make up a religion based on you and would try to get others to join. He has a very mild temperament and is almost always kind to others. However, that doesn’t mean you can go and disrespect him whenever you want. He hates getting his hands and would manipulate anyone so that he can get his way.

🌟 Yandere! Priest is an S tier manipulator. Anything you do or say can be twisted to this man's will. He’s insanely smart and could haggle his way into getting anything for free. Many people look up to him and don’t understand that he’s just using them. To them he’s an angel who would never want to hurt anyone.

🌟 Yandere! Priest secretly puts a tracker on you so that he can track your every move. He is very particular on who gets to associate with you. He won’t even let anyone 20 feet near you if he doesn’t approve of him. Those people don’t even deserve to be in your presence, they're all just lesser beings that might try to corrupt or harm you.

🌟 Yandere! Priest cares a lot about your opinions on him. He’ll sometimes get self conscious and will wonder if he’s pleasing you enough. If you even dare to say that you're unsatisfied with him, he’ll act as if he created the greatest sin in the universe.

🌟 Yandere! Priest most likely met when he’s severely injured and you helped save him. Due to that, he’s been by your side ever since. He was in dire need of assistance and you were brought down from heaven just for him. How could he ever repay you for this? By attending to your needs, after all he was created to serve you.

🌟 Yandere! Priest has an altar of you, where he just prays to it everyday. At night, his thoughts are full of you and when he wakes up, they are still full of you. Nothing is going to change that. His love for you is so immense, that you’ll feel suffocated by it daily. It’s honestly so scary sometimes, no one should be this obsessed with a person.

🌟 Yandere! Priest could never bring himself to yell at you if you ever did something wrong. If anything, he’d gaslight someone else into thinking that they were the ones at fault. “My love did not break that plate, it was just too slippery for someone to hold properly. You should have designed it better, this better not happen again.”

🌟 Yandere! Priest would never harm you if you tried running away from him. Instead he would just give you a disappointed look and then lock you up in a lavish room for a few days. Seeing the look of pain on your face also causes him pain. So he’ll try his best to never cause you any physical harm.

🌟 Yandere! Priest would make running away extremely difficult. He would make sure that guards would always be guarding your room and if you were ever in public eyes would be constantly on you. The vast number of people watching you would deter you from the idea of escaping.

🌟 Yandere! Priest is amazing at painting. When he’s not busy, he spends all of his free time sketching you. You're his favorite thing to draw and are basically his muse. Has multiple sketch books filled to the brim with pictures of you. Will sometimes even run up to you with one of his paintings and wait for you to compliment them.

🌟 Yandere! Priest is willing to be a pawn in any scheme you try to play. He doesn't care if you're just using him, as long as it’s only him. Can sometimes be a little delusional when it comes to you. You’re staying with him because you love him, totally not because he’s forcing his love upon you.

🌟 Yandere! Priest gets so offended if someone dares to even insult you. That is considered blasphemy to him and there’s no way he’s letting that individual get away with that. Whether they are a woman or child, they’re not getting away with it and will be severely punished.

🌟 Yandere! Priest sings praises to you on a daily basis. You can’t go one second without him complimenting you on something. He brags about you to other people so often that they start to get tired of your name. Will go on for hours if he really wanted to. There’s just nothing about you that he doesn’t admire. You’re just so awesome.

🌟 Yandere! Priest dislikes being away from you. Every second away from you is like hell. He honestly can’t stand it. Can be very needy at times and beg for you attention if he has to.

🌟 Yandere! Priest overall is not the worst yandere to have. There definitely are people who are more vicious and willing to take away every freedom you have. Just make sure not to run away from him and you’ll be living a smooth sailing life.

Pt.2

#yandere #yandere headcanons #yandere imagines #yandere x y/n #yandere x you #yandere scenarios #yandere x darling #yandere x reader #male yandere #yandere priest #yandere oc #gn reader

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ladypeonies · 2 months

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This moment is cute. This question about acting was directed at Apo and when asked if he would be paired with someone, Mile jumped in and basically said WE didn’t decide anything. Lol Mr Phakphum where is that WE coming from? By Apo’s knowing smile and look, you know that it isn’t the first time that Mile jumped in, asserted that or shut the whole thing down. I believe it is a sensitive subject for him and here is why I believe so.

Thai entertainment industry creates ‘love couples’ and give each of the young men a precise role according to their position in the unit (top or bottom). They’re taught in those workshops, to drop any awkwardness, to touch, to breathe, to fall in love, etc. They’re encouraged to get closer. Everyone around them talk about them in terms of a pair, husband, wife, your boyfriend, etc. That practice can in my humble opinion be harmful, but it’s a debate for another time.

The thing is it doesn’t matter if you are straight, or gay but not sexually attracted to your love/unit partner, if you’re in love with them or not. It doesn’t matter, you will feel it. They become part of your daily life, you care without meaning to, it’s engrained in you. Until, of course, you part ways and it will be a good and healthy separation or a messy one. I'm not talking about one time love couple, but one with several work together.

I see those pairing like a ‘dating app’, sometimes it matches, work very well. Mile and Apo are a match made in love couples heaven. I’m telling you they exceeded expectations, chemistry, bond-wise. Because they click, they are in tune, they think alike and they have a damn great communication. They know where they are going and why. I think the fact they had a previous connection helped and the fact that they are slightly older than many love units. They fit into those roles which the entertainment industry wants for their love couples, without even thinking about it, because it’s in their nature.

Mile is a carer, he enjoys taking care of Apo as expected of a (Top in the series) and the older one. He’s a gentleman, it’s in him, to let Apo go first, open his bottles, etc. From the very beginning it was that way, even before the shift. Filmania Mile let Apo get away with anything. I mean the man wasn’t even into skinship but let Apo, push him, lay his feet on him, hold him, shake him, etc. He would offer his arm, let himself get styled. Mile paused his interview to tell Apo calling him he was coming to play with him, like? He would see if something disturbed Apo to talk about it. And now … well, I don’t have to say much.

And Apo accepts it as his due lol. It doesn’t mean that Apo doesn’t take care of him, he faced COVID for him. But Mile takes it as his responsibility and shall I say privilege as a gentleman. They have that relationship where he sees Apo as his equal and they have this daddy/baby vibes all the time. It’s in their jokes, the way they behave. His attentiveness is insane, because he knows Apo so well. And Apo can be as demanding, as clingy as he wants because Mile enjoys it.

They went through a lot in a short time. As I say before they designed their relationship and tailored it to their needs, character, wants, etc. I’m convinced that when it’s time to part ways in any love units, it’s always, always more difficult for the one who made it his responsibility to care for the other or the older one in that role. It doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be difficult for Apo, but his experience in the industry would help and prepared him. Remember when they both were all teary thinking about the future without the other. ‘You’ll never lose me.’

In a recent live Pond was doing, Fans requested JobApo and another pairing I think. And I remember Pond replying, ‘You need to be considerate of Mile’s feelings,’ or something of the kind. And I don’t think he was joking. Seeing Mile’s career trajectory, he wants to focus more on music, he wants to go back to his roots, business. Which means if he follows through, Apo will probably be the first and only love couple, he would ever have. And when you think about it, it makes his feelings on the matter even more obvious. He’s not ready to let go and Apo having a love pairing, if I was in his shoes, it would bother me as well. It’s human.

It doesn’t mean he wants Apo to lose any opportunities or prevent him from doing what he wants. I think it would be meaningful for them to finish their cycle together before Apo starts a new one. Look where they come from, what they went through. I kept saying that for these two to have this type of bond which looks like a ten-year-old one, they had to spend a lot of time together. And they do, the bubble is still there.

The day they will part ways, there will be tears, drunken cries, Instagram/twitter posts, and soap operas. They are drama kings after all. Well, they could also surprise me and go all quiet. I think it would be worse lol.

One thing I really appreciate about Mile Phakphum, he's never ashamed of what or who he loves. He will show, be proud of it and play his guitar while all of you yell, throw up, and cry at his choices or tastes.

#mileapo #apo nattawin #mile phakphum

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nekura-haru · 3 months

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I want to move out so bad. I'd thought I'd wait more, but I don't even know what I'm waiting for.

I'm very suicidal at this point. I really can't see hope anywhere. I'm basically caged in my parents' house. I'm a girl, 23 years old. Restricted from work.

I repeated final year of high school and failed to get a diploma twice. Since then I've just stayed home, doing absolutely nothing but exist, and spend someone else's money. I live in a big family. My parents + my 5 siblings. My eldest brother being the one who spend on us, his younger sisters (i am the youngest) Unlike me, all of my sisters have diplomas. I'm the only one without it. I'm deemed stupid by my parents, and I've been told that I'm not worthy of being a working adult, I'm too useless to be able to make my own money. My parents complain 24/7 about having to spend on basic necessities, as if their children weren't their choice.

I've been told 'if you want to live your life the way you want, then get out of this house' that made me feel suffocated. Because my father knew, by all means, I had 0 ways of making money, therefore I can't escape. He believes that we, as his daughters, should stay at his house to serve him, like his fucking housemaids. Make his bed, give him his clothes after he takes a shower, clean after him, do his laundry, make him food on time, and SHOULDN'T be too tired, because we have to be "his joy and bliss" and keep him company while eating. And we shouldn't dare ask anything from him.

So far I believe he'd been the meanest to me. Because he does listen, and doesn't disrespect my sisters as much as he does to me. It breaks me, pains me and hurts me day by day, each word of his pierce through me like a damn bullet to my heart. I believe I don't deserve this. It feels like a nightmare to think I'm going to grow old, and my life is going to end while living inside these same four walls, living for the sake of someone else's happiness, while using someone else's money.

I want to move out. So bad. I want to work. I just want to work. And make my own money, and just feel basic happiness.

Some of you might say 'i am living the dream' i am living in prison. You have no idea. You have no idea how bad it feels. To be caged and suffocated, at the mercy of someone else's money, being badmouthed on a daily basis, being forced to put on this happy face and serve that same person who hates my entire existence.

The only way they'd accepted (because they have no logic) to see me working is doing art commissions. It's never consistent, very unstable, I had just started trying to build my own platform, it has been going well for instagram and tiktok, but it's probably gonna require thousands of followers to be able to get commissions. I've only managed to get some through reddit, which i am very very thankful for. However I'm thinking of giving up. This whole life. I dream of saving up some money so I can move out, from then I won't need money desperately as I would already find a job. (Which, yes, there's PLENTY jobs that don't require high school diplomas. My parents are just devaluing me as a human so that they keep me in their house.)

I had never thought I'd do this in my life, but I would at least try, before I commit. I'm in no way threatening or trying to manipulate anyone to sympathize with me. This is my honest feeling. I can't help feeling depressed and suicidal, and it's no one 's fault but my family's. I'm not trying to make anyone feel guilt for not helping. I couldn't help anyone either, so I really understand.

I know there are people with worse situations out there, that still doesn't make mine any better. All bads are bad.

You can guess by now what's the thing I hate the most in my life. You guessed right. It's being spent on. Being forcibly spent on for 4 years now is pure trauma. I don't want anyone else's money. I desperately want to work, I want to make my own money. So I don't feel like I'm leeching off of someone, or feel like that I'm useless and worthless as they keep telling me everyday.

Even though it's a donation /fundraising site, I would love very much to draw for you if you'd like to send me money. Even if it's only $5, I can draw simple and cute things for you.

-I can draw Chibi, very simple or full render, ranges from $5 ~ $15 -I can draw headshots, bust up, half body, full body Sketches or cell shaded, or full render, ranges from $15 ~ $80 -I can draw backgrounds, price usually depends on how complex it is, but starts from $20 -I can draw multiple people, couples, children or adults, male or female or enbies -I can draw suggestive art / nudity / just not full nsfw (my family members can see me when I'm drawing so I do it sneakily) -I can do character designs / character sheets. I would love to do Vtuber models once I get the hang of it. -If someone find my art interesting enough, I'm open to drawing manga/webtoon art since I've devloped the skill to draw multiple things at a fast pace.

I don't even know if anyone is going to read this, or if this is going to reach anyone, but won't hurt in trying. I don't have a certain goal in mind. My country is very poor, so $1 equals about ×3.7 in my country's currency. For now I'm aiming to save up few hundreds, so I would love to draw bigger arts.

This is my ko-fi

I would appreciate it a lot if you reblog so that other people find this post, it's okay if you don't

Here's examples of my art

#fundraiser #donations welcome #Donations #ko fi commissions #queer artist #toxic parents #toxic household #signal boost #signal b00st #please help #need help #I don't even know #need money #Donation post #mutual aid #donate if you can #help if you can

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buckyalpine · 1 year

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Hi sweet dolcezza (that is Italian and means sweetness so sweet sweetness :) )

Hope you are doing well, I want to thank you again for your beautiful blog and wonderful works.

I am reading the last things you posted, beautiful as always!

Since I live for the drama, the sadness, the darkness...

I was thinking about how a broken boy with traumas, Bucky 🫢, would react about his girlfriend having mental health problem.

Maybe she has been developing them...

She wasn't always like that, she lost her sparkle and he doesn't know her like this, he sees another person, another woman, another human.

He can't understand and is confused, maybe mad.

On one side I think about him being supportive, on the other I think about him being disrespectful and invalidating, like he had lived major traumas but, he says "he is not complaining so much about it or playing the victim" like her.

-I had this hint because my mental health is not good, I have severe OCD, since I was a kid basically I remember being this way since the age of five four. I am struggling with ed and borderline personality disorder.

And I had partners that, even if they lived traumas, still invalidated mine a lot and called me names, so the were basically toxic.-

And i can't picture where Bucky could fall. Toxic? Supportive?

I love him, but sometimes he acts shady and not always I can read him.

I see him dark most of the time.

But they can always repair the relationship and be together or not?

(I am problematic with toxic guys ahahahaha)

Sorry for this and my life story, noone asked about buy still. I just think you are the best person to write something as deep.

I really hope you are doing good and enjoying your day so far.

A lot of kisses and hugs and support.

🌺

18+

Babes we are one in the same with toxic men. I like to think there's the version of Bucky who has so much love and empathy for others going through mental health struggles and then there’s the Bucky who loves you but doesn’t know how to process things and acts impulsively. Here, we look at the second.

Warnings: Angst, Mental health issues, some toxic behavior, (happy ending, they learn to fix things)

Disclaimer: Some of the stuff in this fic are things I/others have gone though so please refrain from comments about why the reader stayed or what the reader should have done or how the story should have gone. Sometimes I get super sucked into the angsty parts and struggle to undo the damage so don’t read too much into it.

I imagine it starts off bad because Bucky's still learning to deal with his own mental health and there are times where he can be selfish without meaning to. He's so used to having you comfort and take care of him, he doesn't know what to do when you start to change. He’s been through so much, he can’t imagine someone else feeling his level of anguish.

You’re no longer the same person he fell in love with. Your sparkle is gone. A grey dullness encasing you. He doesn’t know when things changed or why but he just wants you back; the distance between you both gets worse with each passing day. You try your best to still be there for him because you know he needs it; you love him with all your heart even when your own feels heavy.

"Baby, are you okay?"

"I’m fine"

Bucky practically scoffs when you ask him how he’s doing because you should know he’s never fine. He’s never okay. He doesn't know why you bother asking him when its the same shit he deals with on a daily basis.

You can't bring yourself to tell him how you're feeling because you know he doesn't have the capacity to help you when he's struggling himself. He shrugs, not knowing what else to say, letting you wallow in your misery, taking his frustrations out during his workouts instead. Things continue to worsen; you fall deeper in your spiral while Bucky continues to shut you not, realizing it’s you who needs him.

“Can we talk?”

You’re desperate at this point, hoping maybe he’ll at least listen but he shakes his head instead. Bucky can’t stop the bitterness that starts to rise in his chest; he missed his ma, his sisters. His missed living in a world where he understood the things around him, where he didn’t have to feel like a lost toddler every time he stepped outside. His feelings have nothing to do with you, he really does love you but all the bitterness spills onto the one person who is always there for him.

“What’s the point y/n”

“I-I just feel...” You shrug, not knowing how to tell Bucky of all people that you felt empty.

“What do you feel. I don’t know what you even complain for”

“I feel like I have no one Bucky” You felt your stomach drop when his eyes bore into you, as if he's challenging your feelings.

“You still have your cousins, other family, friends. You complain so much but you’re so spoiled. I’m going through shit too, but you don’t see me acting like a victim”

You swallow the anger that tries to rise, trying to understand his point of view. It all comes to a boiling point because you're trying your hardest to hold it together while he doesn’t see your spiral break down. You felt your heart splinter; after every time you had held him, loved him, cared for him, he looked at you with emptiness.

“Bucky, I know you’re going through things-

“Things? You think I can just turn this fucking shit off y/n? I’m not fucking normal, and you’ll never fucking get it. Honestly, I don’t know what to tell you, I’ll stay at Steve’s tonight”

He makes his way to the door and you know you can’t be alone tonight, there’s too much going on inside.

“Please don’t” your voice is a plea, your practically begging at this point. You can feel your throat tighten because you feel selfish for struggling when he’s been through so much worse.

“Bucky please stay” you trail behind him, your knees shaking. You try to tug at his wrist but he doesn’t let you. When you finally try to cling onto his arm, his composure breaks.

“GET OFF ME” he pulls out of your grasp, sending you stumbling back. He’s usually mindful of his strength but he doesn’t think and you lose your balance, ending up on the floor. He freezes in utter disbelief with himself, he’d never in a million years even try to hurt you.

“Fuck, baby I’m so so-”

“Don’t”

Your eyes are now stone cold, your voice was low. He tries to help you up but you scramble away from him, adding distance between you both. He takes a step forward again but something isn’t right, he finally sees how broken you look.

“Y/n….”

“GET OUT”

Your voice tore through the walls and his eyes are wide with fear because he's never seen you so broken. He’s never heard you raise your voice like this; you’d always spoken to him softly. He’s scared because he didn’t mean to push you to your breaking point and he doesn’t know how to take it back.

"I-"

“GET THE FUCK OUT”

You pick yourself off the floor, your heart beating through your chest. You practically see red, after everything you had done for him, he called you selfish; you sat through every one of his panic attacks, his depressed days, his nightmares. He couldn't listen to you for one night.

"You fucking piece of shit"

You angrily tried to wipe your face, moving away from him to pack a bag, not wanting to be near him for a minute longer. You go straight to your room while he runs after you, panic rising, he wants to cry but he can’t, not right now.

“Doll I’m sorry-

“I don’t care” You rummage through some of your belongings, feeling yourself go numb. You felt like your mind didn’t even belong to you anymore, your body moving in autopilot. Bucky hates the vacant look on your face, he wants to hold you and tell you he’s sorry. He tries to wrap his arms around you, not knowing what else to do but you shove him away, shaking your head.

“Don’t-don’t touch me, don’t ever fucking touch me again”

He watches helplessly when you rip yourself away, shoving a few things into your duffle bag, not meeting his eyes.

"I-I don't fucking love you, I-I'm d-d-one with you"

“Baby please don’t go”

“Oh, so when you beg, I have to stay?” You scoff, letting out a humorless laugh “Fuck off”

He’s terrified now because while your movements are robotic, your body is shaking and you don’t even seem to notice. Bucky hates seeing you trembling; you’re about to leave the room and walk out but he stops you.

“Bucky, move” You suck in a breath, your nails digging into your hands, but he stays rooted in place.

“No bubba”

“Don’t call me that” Your voice trembles, another surge of anger flowing through you when he tries to reach out for you. “I SAID DON’T TOCUH ME”

He pulls you to his chest and you try to rip yourself free but he doesn’t let you go.

“LET GO”

Bucky shakes his head, hugging you tighter, his tears dampening your hair. The screams and wails ripping from your chest burn his insides, you desperately try to escape but he cradles you closer.

“M’sorry”

“L-let me g-o”

“M’sorry baby, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” He doesn’t care that your hitting his chest, he doesn’t care that your hands keep striking him. He can feel your body give way, your breaths uneven, months of pain spilling out all at once. He hugs you tighter like he should have done ages ago, realizing you needed him more than ever. Your body continues to fight but your angry screams turn into pained sobs.

“I’m so sorry my babygirl”

He carefully carries you to the bed where he can hold you in his lap. He tries to think of what you do for him, warming your body, rubbing his hands along your back and arms. He feels awful because you always take such good care of him and he was grasping at straws trying to do the same for you. You deserved so much more.

“Shhhh” His lips brush against your forehead, one hand gently rubbing your chest while the other continues to soothe your back so he can regulate your breathing. “Slowly baby, breathe with me, okay?”

You say nothing, but you try to follow his breaths, letting him take care of you. He continues to tell you how much he loves and cares for you, how sorry is he for hurting you. Exhaustion takes over and you allow yourself to fall asleep with him. A part of you is still angry but your too weak to move and you need to be held.

You wake up in the middle of the night feeling his chest tremble against you. His soft sniffles are muffled as he tries to keep his cries down while cuddling you close.

“Bucky?” You lift your head to see his broken expression.

“I’m s-sorry” He chokes out, breaking down. He feels selfish again because he should be the one comforting you but he was angry with himself. “I-I can’t believe I hurt you angel”

You move up so you can wipe some of his tears, his face puffy having cried for hours through the night.

“I just needed you” You gently your fingers through his hair trying to calm him down.

“I-I said shit I never should have said baby, I’m sorry. M’sorry sweet girl”

“Why did you say those things” you whisper, your voice still hoarse.

“I’m so sorry angel, I- there’s not excuse, I’m sorry I was so selfish doll”

You nod, still feeling drained though a part of you feels better. You hadn’t fully forgiven him yet but you knew he meant every word plus there was no one else in the world you loved as much as him. He thinks about the way he mistreated you, realizing he really didn’t deserve your forgiveness at all. Your words replay in his head and his breaths become shallow.

“Do-do you not love me anymore?” His voice is a broken whisper. You knew you didn’t mean it. The thought nearly kills him. He would have gone through hydra again over ever losing your love. Your thumb brushes over his lips silencing him.

“Please don’t say you don’t love me” He nuzzles himself further into your side, hugging you tightly, his voice a whimper. “Please, I’m sorry”

“I was just angry Bucky. I love you” He calms down slightly but hes still on edge with himself. He wants to do better. He wants to take care of you. You had been there through everything for him and you deserved the same love a thousand times over.

“I promise I’ll try harder angel”

He stays true to his word.

It doesn’t resolve overnight.

But he learns. And so do you.

He’s patient with you. He gives you endless love. He has his own hard days, and so do you but your by each others side through it all. He sees your sparkle return brighter than ever,

Because he really does love you.

Tags:

@glxwingrxse @hungryyeyess @sebsgirl71479 @beabutterfly987 @teambarnes72 @witchywhore @jamesbuckybarneswify @slutforsexyseabass @chrisdrysdale @littlemarvelmenfan @buggy14 @whimsyplaty92 @sergntbarnes @inkedaztec @pono-pura-vida @moonlightreader649 @brooklynscherry-z @elle14-blog1 @justsebstan @littlelightnings @psychomanniac-blog @happyt0exist @emmabarnes @bethyruth @matchat3a @cjand10 @getwellsoontana @cherryschaos @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @ashenc-blog @buckybarnessimpp @potatothots @goldylions @high-functioning-lokipath @morganemorganite-blog @kingfleury @peaches1958 @spiderman-stilinski @peaceinourtime82 @gublur @wintersmelodie @geeky-politics-46 @lolawassad @almosttoopizza @a-poor-gryffindork @alternativeprincess @buckycallsmeaslut @kamaria-sweet-writes @charmedbysarge @xnorthstar3x @kryoee7 @alina02 @gh0stgurl @polishprincess999 @jessybarnes @carrotfantasimp

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atlantis-just-drowned · 15 days

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HI OH MY GOD. i love your writing style for pluto sm, can i get headcanons for a reader like Eulalie ??? i love her sm <3 ty !!

A/N: Omg thank you so much Anon that's adorable!! I made this a gn!reader haha sorry if that wasn't what was intended-

Pluto x reader who's like Eulalie headcanons

Please reblog this post to show support! Reblogs are what keep me going!

Oh gosh you're his literal ray of sunshine

You don't even imagine, like

You're the optimist to his pessimistic side

Every time he sees you or hear you he can't help but feel like this world is suddenly a bit warmer and easier to live in

You make him smile

On a daily basis

He basically can't look at you without smiling

Even is he's in a bad mood his heart will melt a bit at your mere presence

I feel like he would be extremely protective of you too

Because you seem so oblivious he gets scared someone might trick you and hurt you :0

So as far as he's concerned, he's right by your side/behind you shooting death stares to any stranger who talks to you

Some will say he's creepy but to you this is the cutest thing in the world

He's your social support catboy

If you want some privacy tho he'll totally respect that and walk away

(but not without glancing at you with worried eyes for as long as he can see you)

But if he doesn't trust the person you're talking to, he'll stay close enough to be able to hear you if you scream or call for him

You know? Just in case anything happens

When he has a bad day he likes to hug you tight and hide his face in you chest or neck

Hug him back and he'll be in heaven

If you ask him what's going on he'll probably just mumble something unintelligible and hug you a little tighter

He likes your positivity and energy

But what he loves the most is to see you in a peaceful state

I'm talking, cuddling him or him cuddling you and you just

Close your eyes

And lay there

With his arms around you

Oh fuck oh shit oh damn he's so screwed his heart is melting inside

He would rather die on the spot than disturb you

He'll never say it out loud but in these moments he just hold you a little tighter and swear to himself that he'll protect you of harm and do everything to make sure you're happy

Even if your happiness doesn't include him, he wouldn't care as long as you stay as peaceful as you look right now for the rest of your life

He will. Literally. Never. Question. Anything that you say.

If you're in the middle of a dangerous situation and you ask him to bring you something

He won't say a word

He'll just do it

Even if it's absolutely useless

You have your reasons

And you must be granted what you asked for

I'm literally not kidding he would do anything you'd ask for, this little guy has an incredible determination

Even if he doesn't understand why you're asking something, he knows your mind functions a little differently from anyone else and he'll support you on that, no question asked

His only limit is that he won't harm himself or harm you in any way, shape or form. If you ask for something dangerous and one of you might get hurt because of it, he'll refuse

Also if you mess up with anything while getting focused on whatever you're doing, he'll make sure to clean up after you

You might not even notice it

But the next time you walk in the same hallway all of the knots you did with the curtains have been untied

Books are in alphabetical order again, no matter how many times you disorganize them

If you like to craft handmade things like necklaces or accessories he'll stay by your side and keep your materials organised

He likes to watch you while you're creating things, you look so sweet and relaxed

Sometime he'll chat with you while you're at it, but if you prefer to stay quiet he'll comply, silence doesn't bother him anyway

He'll remind you to pay attention to things too

Or if you forget you have something important to do

He'll be here to make sure you remember about it

Tho he'll feel a little sad if you forget about one of your dates but he'll understand really

On the other hand he finds it cute if you keep asking him just how long before your next date or hangout

The thought of you being somewhat impatient to spend time with him melts his heart inside <3

#pluto nevermore #nevermore webtoon #nevermore webcomic #nevermore #webtoon nevermore #pluto x reader #headcanons #nevermore pluto #answered #whispers from atlantis

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lotusmi · 1 year

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lotusmiii.. i really need your help. so a few weeks ago while i was in a mental hospital my mom went through my phone, my room and literally anything i owned (because they are required to do that without your permission sadly…) as she saw my manifestation list which was literally everything that was going to be in my dream life (and basically i planned on being a whole different person (from past, to parents, to my physical looks, my personality, where i live- you name it) and im guessing she showed the staff and my mental hospital doctor too and while i was there they were giving lessons based off of the things that were on there (“insecurities”, “learning/forgiving mistakes”, even some of the mental health numbers i texted in a crisis) cause they also do that.. but the problem is everytime i think of my dream life list or whenever i see something that reminds me of what i wrote (ex. my desired body) i cant stop thinkin about them seeing it.. like i tried to revise it but i failed on changing self because i couldn’t stop thinking about it and feeling all type of emotion (like guilt, embarrassment and so and so).. idk it really makes me feel hopeless of manifesting my dream life just thinking about them seeing it all. idk i just really need help and this is fucking up my mental health even worse when it comes to terms of manifestation

kind long post, read it fully to know one of my success storys! :)

Look, I used to be completely afraid of my parents discovering things about me. I would keep imaginating what they would thought or if they would punish me. The fact is, always when I was doing something I did not wanted to be discovered, I would be thinking like "oh so certain they seeing, I am so sure they will discover" etc. And hmm.. What men gives in their imagination is always reflected, right? They always discovered, I always was punished. They discovered about my previous sub channel, my mom read all my manifesting lists too. She thought I was part of a cult. It was hell like. I was so afraid of her.

The point is, as I learned the law and I learned everyone is me pushed out. I learned I could change their behavious towards me by changing their behaviours within me. So i stopped wondering "what if they discover, what if this that..."

”Don’t hold onto anything on the outside; hold on only in your imagination. If something is taken from you, it is because at one time you assumed its loss and for a moment wondered what you would do if it were. You forgot the thought (the assumption made and felt real), but its message had already been released to fulfill itself." - Neville Goddard

By constantly assuming my mom would discover and punish me. By constantly imagining how would she punish me, I was always and always punished, humiliated, etc. It was depressed by daily hearing my mom joking aroud saying stuff like "Oh is my skin more white? i just listened to a biokinesis video". I was literally obligated to confess "my sins" becaus of this "whichcraft" and the "cult". Literally, she wanted even to follow my thoughts, I was obligated to be catholic etc.

✉ So my advice IS do not re-think and remember, or even wonder if a person discovered something or if a person will punish you, judge you. DON'T EVEN WONDER. Why? because you will start feeling worry and afraid, and because you feel this emotions, you would start thinking that that you are imagining will manifest, and I know exaclty how it feels. That's why I am saying this. So if the thought of "oh but they saw", or even "oh but what she is thinking of this" cames, tell yourself IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN, IT IS DONE. I AM SAFE. And ignore those thoughts, thoughts don't manifest, states do. What is a state? A state is what you indentify yourself having or being. So tell yourself that those things will not happen and they won't, since what you do in imagination is reflected! What they doing, thinking? WHAT YOU WANT. They don't know it! Black point!

♡ My SUCCESS STORY DOING THIS:

Back at december, I really wanted to have Neville Goddard books. I really wanted. So I have a kindle (it's like a tablet with ebooks), and I found this ebook with all Neville works, so I downloaded. I was really afraid my dad would saw it since of all shit I had to deal in past, but I was assuming he won't see. The problem is, It was a free sample of only 20% of the ebook, and as most of you know, amazon has this BUY WITH ONE CLICK option, and I BOUGHT BY ACCIDENT! That's when I got super anxious, I BOUGHT THE E-BOOK! It was kinda of expansive in my country coin and I know my dad would question me about it, he would receive the email and see the book.. He would ask me about it! I was so worried!!! But then I put myself in track, and even doubting, I told myself he won't see and he won't bother me. I kept telling this to myself and affirming to keep myself in the state that I was safe. I control my reality. I sent amazon a return request but it occoured an error, I was so worried at this point because i was afraid he see that.

At the end, he saw. He really did. But he only said "did u buy this ebook?" i said "yea, it was by accident, I sent the return request". Then he ignored and never talked about this anymore.

The SUCCESS part is: I STILL HAVE THE EBOOK. I have the ebook with all Neville works and all lectures (more than 400) FOR FREE! So that's most it! We are the power and we decided what will happen to us or how people will treat us. :)

#neville goddard #success story #loatumblr #loa advice #loa tumblr #loa blog #loassumption #law of assumption #living in the end #states

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valley-of-headcanons · 8 months

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how about some headcanons of Haley, Abigail and Alex with a very hyperfem farmer!!! y'know, the kind of person that is always wearing cute clothes, putting on makeup, acts like a princess and is basically a carbon, living copy of a Barbie doll.

i'm a very hyperfem person so i love making my in-game farmers based on my sense of style, and i would love to see your take on it :]

abigail, alex, and haley with hyperfemme! farmer || headcanons

your style is so adorable and cute, and your partner loves everything about it! <3

warning: very feminine farmer, but gender neutral pronouns! nothing else that i can see <3

requested by: anon, thank you so much for the request! you didn't specify romantic or non romantic, so im gonna assume romantic in this case! if not, please send in another request and i'll 100% fix it <3 but this request was so fun to write! i'm turning more and more into a barbie daily (especially after the barbie movie 🙏) and this request hit a bit close to home! thanks for the request barbie <3

abigail

• Abigail has a very alternative style, she hates dressing in girly clothes and cutesy styles ... but she can definitely appreciate their beauty. And your beauty is the one she's focused on the most. She loves you, and thinks you're the cutest person on the planet! She cannot get enough of your cute outfits, intricate makeup, and princess attitude!

• She loves teasing you about your attitude, giving you the nickname "princess" every time you ask her for something simple. She loves seeing your cute little attitude, and always gives you a little kiss afterward to make up for it. “Sorry princess, I won't tease you anymore ... even though I know you love it,” she'll say with a mischievous grin.

• She goes out of her way to protect you, her adventurous spirit getting the best of her. Even if it's something as small as getting your new heels muddy, she'll either bridal style or piggyback you across. She cares a lot about you and she knows how important your aesthetic is. It's not life or death, but she wants to be attentive to the little things. Little things to show that she cares.

• Abigail adores you more than anything, and it really shows. You're flooded with compliments, although they may be unusual or odd at times. She loves seeing you flustered and happy, regardless of your style. She used to hate the color pink, but ... when it reminds her of the best person that's ever been in her life, how could she hate it now?

alex

• Alex has always found a Barbie aesthetic incredibly gorgeous, and it's not a surprise that his partner is decked out in pink and glitter. He cannot get enough of you! Every time you walk in the room, his jaw is on the floor, his eyes are pinned on you. Every aspect of you is perfect in his eyes, and your style is only an accessory, but it's a nice plus!

• He would do anything you asked without skipping a beat. Whether it be helping you with farm work or going to the store for something, he's got you. He'll give you a kiss on the forehead and bend over backwards for you. He loves your princess attitude and adores how you're so loving and vulnerable you are at the same time. Of course you could do all these things yourself, but you trust him with these little things? He is so excited to do anything you ask.

• He would never admit it, but he really wants you to do his makeup at least once. He's never experienced it, and he thinks it could be fun! But you are not allowed to show anyone pictures or anything, he's not THAT comfortable with his masculinity ... but you can have your little dress up party with him. You're the only person he'll trust with this, and he's glad he's breaking down his walls with you.

• Alex really loves you, and he shows it as much as he can. He brags to all of his friends about how gorgeous his partner is, and how confident and smart and pretty you are, and how he'd do absolutely anything for you. He adores how brave you are as well, how no matter what anyone says, you OWN your femininity. And you're the bravest Barbie around in his eyes.

haley

• Haley needs her partner to have just as much style as she does, and she loves that aspect of you. She adores fashion, and your sense of style is out of this world! You two look like you've come straight out of Barbieland! She loves showing you off, a gigantic smirk on her faces when the guys and girls see how hot and gorgeous her partner is. And your attitude matches hers, you two are truly a match made in heaven.

• She loves shopping with you, and shopping for you! She'll show you things that she thinks will look absolutely gorgeous on you, and she knows you well enough that she knows exactly what you like! If you thank her, she'll brush it off with a small blush. “Oh whatever- just try this on! I might steal it out of your closet anyway ...”

• The princess attitude back and forth has led to many humorous moments. You two are pretty good at never giving in, so the score has remained tied for years. Haley really does like seeing you happy, and although puts up a fight, would do anything you ask. And she knows that you would do the same. Although the "arguments" are very entertaining to her, so of course she's going to put up a fight.

• You and Haley have a lot of similarities, but they work really well together. She understands you and your femininity more than most people, and is a really good friend and partner. She adores you, and how wonderful you are. You don't have to be feminine, you don't have to be masculine, you just have to show her the love she needs. She'll show you so much in return.

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runwayrunway · 7 months

Text

No. 51 - Alaska Airlines

This is one of my most requested posts. Apparently, a very significant portion of my readers fly Alaska Airlines!

That tracks. Alaska Airlines is the fifth largest airline in the US. A sort of anti-Flair, they are supposedly the least complained-about full-service carrier in the US. They are also one of five remaining US legacy carriers, along with American Airlines, Delta Air Lines, Hawaiian Airlines, and United Airlines. They operate a massive network primarily on the US West Coast, with bits branching out into nearby slices of the Americas. As one might surmise from prior knowledge of the size and population of Alaska, they're actually mostly based in Seattle.

Now, when it comes to their livery, there's one thing that stands out. At least, it stood out to me, and I'm sure at least some of you have had this thought too.

That is a human person's face on the tailfin. But who does that face belong to, and why is it on the Alaska Airlines fleet? This is precisely the sort of trivia I think anyone who knows me would expect me to be able to just rattle off, but actually...I don't know, and neither, as far as I can tell, does anyone else. Isn't that weird?

(By the way, it is indeed Alaska Airlines. I have always found that somewhat unintuitive. It's just not how you're used to hearing things phrased, right? It's Possessive Noun Airlines, Air Noun. America Airlines would sound weird. Alaska Airlines sounds weird. I am never surprised when people mistakenly say Alaskan Airlines, but it's Alaska Airlines. Just so we're all on the same page.)

Alaska's a bit of a hard place to navigate. Big empty place, lots of ice, lots of mountains, islands, trees...not very much asphalt. That's even true now, but it used to be way truer, and even back then people did still live there. And there's a lot of things those people might maybe like to have, like medical care, or food, or just the hypothetical possibility of getting somewhere without having to get the snowshoes out. In that sense, Alaska is a really perfect place for aviation to flourish.

More or less as early as physically possible, when there were planes available that weren't requisitioned for the first World War or owned by the ultra-rich, people were flying in Alaska. In a lot of ways the basic landscape hasn't changed that much. With its surplus of difficult environments and paucity of actual tarmac Alaska's harsh wilderness is an environment only suited for "bush" flying, using smaller, more rugged airplanes specialized for the environment. Some of the most popular models of bush plane are very old, not that dissimilar to what you'd see in the 50s and 60s - apparently, they just don't make them the same anymore, and as long as you don't get your de Havilland Beaver crunched horribly into the side of a mountain there's just nothing that can replace it. Alaska is full of planes on floats, planes on skis, and taildraggers on tundra tires, most of them high-wing and piston-engined. Bush pilots are a unique sort, often doing work that's neither glamorous nor lucrative (nor safe, with Alaska having two to five times the accident rate of the lower 48) but undeniably necessary.

That's not as true of Alaska Airlines. They have a modern fleet, a good safety record except for that one time, and as a category III carrier they make over a billion dollars in revenue each fiscal year, meaning their finances aren't too strained (except for that one time). Unlike the local carriers that connect remote parts of Alaska to resources and to major cities, Alaska Airlines connects Alaska to the rest of the nearby world. (Though it also does short, multi-stop milk run flights.) It's a necessary part of the ecosystem, helping to keep Alaska's beautiful but hostile terrain from getting in the way of daily life. Before they became Alaska Airlines, though, they were far more similar to what you might expect of...Alaska airlines.

Image: Roy S. Dickson

In 1932, a man with the fantastic name 'Linious McGee' started his very own airline. You could just do that back then. In 1934 it was merged into Star Air Service, another tiny airline. Star Air Service had also been founded in 1932, born from the flight-school-starting dreams of a wealthy miner with the similarly wonderful name 'Wesley Earl Dunkle'. Apparently Star had its first ever aircraft, a Fleet B-5 biplane, brought to Alaska by steamship, which I just find fairly interesting. I guess this was before you could even ferry an airplane directly to Alaska by air. They ate up a few other small airlines (and their routes), and in 1943 they won a small scuffle against another pretender to formerly rebrand themselves as Alaska Airlines. So it's been 80 years of that now!

They've gone from flying Curtiss Robins, Ford Trimotors, and Lockheed Vegas to flying basically only 737s, save a few vestigial A320 family aircraft acquired when merging with Virgin America which they plan to phase out by the end of 2024. Their livery is also on E175 regional jets operated by Horizon Air and SkyWest. The airplanes flying for them number around 300. That's incredibly large even by the standards of major airlines (not even counting the SkyWest planes that have the livery).

The Alaska Airlines livery is not breaking any molds and I need to say that upfront. This is a very straightforward pattern I've taken to calling the Lufthansa Declined, or the Lufthansa Line SAS Variation. (Because the push and pull of trend cycles in brand identity is basically comparable to chess, right? Maybe? No? Not really?) I've recently codified the concept of the Lufthansa Line, the straight line continuing where the tailfin left off to carve through the fuselage. This is a very common and very disappointing fuselage trope. The Declined, or SAS Variation, is named for an airline I specifically contrasted with Lufthansa from my very first post on this blog, SAS.

The SAS Variation simply curves this line outwards towards the front of the plane, stopping the cutoff from being quite so blunt and hopefully undoing the unbalancing effect somewhat. This can solve some of the nastier effects of Lufthansa Lines, particularly on shorter planes, but can also look very wonky if implemented without enough care. It's not always a big improvement, but it's definitely not the exact same thing, either, and it's this shape which Alaska Airlines attempts. Being introduced in 2016, this livery actually pre-dates SAS, but Delta and Lufthansa weren't starting their own namesake patterns either. The names aren't attributed based on innovation, but on formative status in my own specific understanding of airline liveries. SAS as contrasted to Lufthansa is the holotype for my creation of the taxon, and thus earlier liveries are retroactively SASlikes. Birds are dinosaurs and whales are ungulates. Taxonomy is imperfect and has to accommodate new discoveries within a sometimes unintuitive framework. That's just how it is.

I think they do better than many. The fact that they use so many colors, layered over each other, is crucial to the effect. It accomplishes similar things as a gradient might, transitioning from dark to light with minimal pain in the process.

Image taken from Alaska Airlines's very useful branding style guide.

The shades of blue and green used resemble the Aurora Borealis. I can't find anything confirming that this is intentional but I can't imagine it isn't. I think they're very nicely chosen. Different lightings can make the blue (Alaska's material calls it midnight blue, but it's technically Prussian blue) look anywhere from true vivid blue to more of a deep ocean color, which is one of my favorite shades. In particular, the very washed out yellowish green is an absolutely gorgeous choice for a highlight color. I like that the colors aren't given equal purchase, though, and that the green is used sparingly for highlight, and to create that lovely subtle 'halo' around the face on the tail. Sometimes less is more, and this is one of those cases. In fact, their own website states:

Midnight is our primary brand color, and should be used sparingly to avoid overuse—giving more prominence to the Alaska Airlines brand.

(They also note that they took specific efforts in the design process to make sure these colors had significant contrast between them to meet accessibility standards, which I really appreciate and want to see more of.)

For example, if the 'intermediate' blue colors took up more of the plane, or were separate from the green, I would probably not feel any real way about them. I definitely wouldn't think they were nice if they just did a standard Lufthansa Line block with each color individually expressed. But using them as a trim to a nice clear deep blue, overlapping each other in a way that's very carefully mapped out but seems at a glance essentially random, halfway to mixing, like the dark tail is melting slowly into the fuselage...that's nice. That adds something.

The partially-overlapping, brushlike curves are further expressed as swashes on the winglets and engines. What's interesting to me is that if you look closer you can see that the little curves are on both the inboard and outboard sides of each engine and winglet, so you get that consistent curve, hypothetically, no matter what angle you see it from. I do think I appreciate that. The curves are just never going to all line up, because airplanes are inconveniently three-dimensional and there are as many angles to view them from as there are Planck lengths at a distance where you can tell what it is you're seeing. This is a weakness in all liveries more detailed than a Braniff jellybean and adding the curves to even the side of the engine that you're usually not going to see is definitely an appreciated attempt to mitigate this. Does it work? Maybe not totally, but I see the effort.

While there's never a perfect syzygy into one continuous line, the curves seem like they're part of the same nebulous body from most angles. I appreciate this approach. I think making things look pretty good from most angles is worth more than making things look really good from one angle and awkward from all others. As they say, the perfect is the enemy of the good. I absolutely love the use on just the inside middle of the scimitar winglet, which I already think is a gorgeous feature that just elevates the MAX and retrofitted 737NGs compared to the vanilla model. It's distinctive and stylish, and the limiting of the color to just the lower half of the upper blade has a real restrained elegance to it - these slashes of color are all the more effective for the way they interact with the space around them.

Just look at these winglets. They're such a tiny feature. It's absolutely wild that I can be this in love with winglets, but there's just something about split scimitar wingtips that make me go completely wild. The amount of space and the interesting shape leaves so much more room for creativity than just about any other wingtip device. Alaska Airlines does have planes with other wingtip styles, and it uses those effectively too - covering the lower half of canted/blended winglets and fully encompassing the interior of less pronounced split winglets - but this is where they look their best.

Back to bad angles, though...

Alaska Airlines has a weird weak spot, and it's from the front and slightly above. All those gorgeous swoops on the winglets and nacelles are basically impossible to see due to their two-dimensional nature, and you can see how the colors don't fully cover the back of the fuselage. My normal policy is to judge liveries by their weakest link, but I honestly almost want to be lenient on this because of how unlikely it is that you're ever going to see an airplane from this angle. The only situations you're ever above an airplane in are ones you're basically never going to encounter as a regular passenger. Don't get me wrong, I still think this could have been designed in a way which eliminates this weak point, but as far as weak points go this is quite excusable. Is that what Thetis thought when she dipped her son in the Styx? Sure, probably, but I stand by my take. For a lot of liveries their worst angle is close to side-on, which is just fully experience-ruining. This? I'm okay with this, relatively speaking.

On the other hand, one of the better angles is one a lot more people will see - below and to one side. The taper of the different bands of color really prevents the awful jarring cutoff that Lufthansa Line and SAS Variation liveries often have, and I feel like they trick the eye into thinking up more of the fuselage is occupied than it really is. Also worth noting is that the grey underside, which resembles a shadow, is actually intentionally painted on, which is lovely. This is a feature common to the Deltalike livery trend that I outline at the start of my Southwest post, which I do think is one of the things that makes me honestly a bit sympathetic to Deltalikes when looking at them next to Lufthansalikes - at least there's an attempt to distribute visual detail evenly. Deltalikes were already a bit dated by 2016 (it was not the longest-lived trend, though it came at a time in my life perfectly positioned to make me think it was more prominent than it was) while SASlikes were on the rise, and this livery has aspects of each, but it feels less like a conflicted result of an intermediate period in dominant trends and more like something which intentionally pulled features from both where it thought they might work best. It's rare that I get this sense from a livery. That's the right way to use trends - as inspiration, not a template.

Alaska Airlines is definitely not a true Deltalike, and I would argue it's not a true SAS Variation either. (For the record, I would consider the 1998 SAS livery a Deltalike, funnily enough!) It incorporates features of both, which makes me feel uncomfortable classifying it definitively as either, though it's definitely more of a SASlike than not. For example, from the side it just is a SASlike, because the grey doesn't go high enough and isn't contrasting enough to be visible except from below. This is in contrast to actual Deltalikes, which have a thin but clearly visible line on the lower side where the underside's block of color bleeds out.

This grey color is also on the engine nacelles, although it is very subtle. This does bring up a minor gripe of mine, which is that the design on the pods cuts off at a bit of an awkwardly sharp angle, usually not worth remarking on but possible to notice from some angles if you are, say, a livery reviewer and you look at these things very closely. What I do like, though, is that the grey on the belly actively connects to the color on the tail, feeling like an extension of it instead of an awkward choice made to mitigate it.

The final specific feature of the livery I think I want to comment on is the wordmark. I really like the wordmark. It's not in their custom typeface, AS Circular, a Roboto-ish sans serif I'm not a gigantic fan of, although I really like their custom web icons. They also use Highest Praise by Adam Ladd, a fairly cheap commercially available font.

As for the wordmark itself, though, I can't seem to find what font it's based on! I have to say the original 1966 logo would be great if another airline were to use it, the 1972 is somehow giving supermarket chain, and the 1990 logo would be great if not for the weird way the K overlaps the A, which just feels sloppy and unprofessional. The 2014 and 2016 incarnations, though, are great. The 2016 one (designed by the firm Hornall Anderson) feels like a great update, just cleaning up the earlier version, though I somewhat miss the lightning-bolt S.

The placement is what I want to talk about, though. Placing a wordmark is more of an art than you might think - I'll show a couple examples of Alaska itself doing a slightly wonky job later - but when Alaska's placement is good it's great. It's one of the least cramped-looking wordmarks I've ever seen, feeling free and airy, spreading upwards above the window line. The descending line on the K and the trailing like on the A both create a feeling of freedom, like it could just keep going but doesn't want to, yet is tastefully restrained and doesn't actually overstep its bounds. I like the solid single color, and I like that it reaches almost to the engines, preventing that empty-forward-half feeling. The one thing I'll comment on for this set of images is that the left-to-right reading direction of English does mean that it looks distinctly worse seen from one side than the other. I much prefer the forward slant, which feels aerodynamic fitting with the motion of the plane, vs the alternative, in which it feels like the wordmark is trying to catch up with the aircraft's nose.

On shorter planes, though, Alaska fumbles a little. They choose to line up the wordmark with the engines instead of with the nose, creating an awkward look when it overlaps the door and nearly reaches the cockpit window. I would have leaned in the other direction were I them. This picture also demonstrates a strange feature which rears its head in certain lightings where the shading on the tailfin image makes it look almost wrinkled. I don't have anything to add to that or know how to solve it, but I need to point it out.

On a very long plane, conversely, the back half of Alaska's planes begins to feel that Lufthansa Line emptiness. The vast, vast majority of their planes are of a moderate enough length that neither issue is too overpowering, but I'm taking a wide view here! Also, the wordmark here seems to not be aligned with the engines, so...what's the idea?

Alaska Airlines is an interesting livery. More interesting than I thought I'd find it for sure. It's not just a SASlike with pleasing colors and a nice wordmark, it's a SASlike with thought put into features that can mitigate the inherent weaknesses of the SASlike. It doesn't always fully succeed, nor does it comprehensively fail, but it definitely tries.

At the end of the day, as usual, I wish there was less white. I'm sure it could have been done. I don't have an obvious solution in mind like I do for some hypothetical redesigns, so it's something I would have to think over and really dig into, but, like, Alaska Airlines makes more than a billion in revenue every year so I think that's reasonable to expect from them.

I initially started using the grading system as a way to categorize liveries without limiting myself to a very specific scale that I'll dither about for years and then change my mind about later, but it's started to end up in that role. I just don't know what better solution there is, so I'm going to continue trying to make it work. Alaska Airlines is a livery that I ultimately think I like, that I think is designed decently, but that is limited by the fact that a really good SASlike is still a SASlike - mostly white and rear-heavy. It's getting the most possible out of a flawed paradigm, and I've been inconsistent so far on how I rate a good SASlike or Lufthansalike because it causes me some legitimate cognitive dissonance.

I'm giving Alaska Airlines a provisional B-.

I think I might downgrade it to C+ later, which is why I say it's provisional. A good execution of something really limited - how do I even rate that? It's somewhere between tepidly good and better-than-average, which is a really awkward place to be. But that's probably a conversation for another day, because this post is long enough and I'm still not done.

Okay, I teased this earlier.

Him. Who is he?

The short answer: nobody knows. Not me, and not Alaska Airlines.

The long answer: deserves its own post. Both because it's long, and because I've hit image limit. And there will be images. Join me in tomorrow's bonus, where we climb our way through the rugged terrain of seemingly-lost history to attempt to put a name to this ubiquitous face.

#tarmac fashion week #grade: b-#era: 2010s #era: 2020s #region: north america #region: united states #alaska airlines #legacy carriers #lufthansa declined #deltalike #skywriting

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warrioreowynofrohan · 1 year

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Since people are talking about “castles in the air” again for Dracula Daily - it means, basically, your ideal futures. Your dreams of what your life could be if everything went how you wanted. It seems to have been a fairly common phrase in the 19th century - it’s used in Little Women - and there’s no romantic connotation to it (except for the fact that in this case, in Dracula, both of the women are hoping soon to be married). A bit like today we have “what would you do if you won the lottery?”, expect more expansive because it’s not just about money.

Here’s a bit from the chapter of Little Women entitled (natch!) “Castles in the Air” to illustrate:

“Wouldn't it be fun if all the castles in the air which we make could come true, and we could live in them?" said Jo, after a little pause.

"I've made such quantities it would be hard to choose which I'd have," said Laurie, lying flat, and throwing cones at the squirrel who had betrayed him.

"You'd have to take your favorite one. What is it?" asked Meg.

"If I tell mine, will you tell yours?"

"Yes, if the girls will too."

"We will. Now, Laurie."

"After I'd seen as much of the world as I want to, I'd like to settle in Germany, and have just as much music as I choose. I'm to be a famous musician myself, and all creation is to rush to hear me; and I'm never to be bothered about money or business, but just enjoy myself, and live for what I like. That's my favorite castle. What's yours, Meg?”

Margaret seemed to find it a little hard to tell hers, and waved a brake before her face, as if to disperse imaginary gnats, while she said slowly, "I should like a lovely house, full of all sorts of luxurious things,—nice food, pretty clothes, handsome furniture, pleasant people, and heaps of money. I am to be mistress of it, and manage it as I like, with plenty of servants, so I never need work a bit. How I should enjoy it! for I wouldn't be idle, but do good, and make every one love me dearly."

“Wouldn't you have a master for your castle in the air?" asked Laurie slyly.

"I said 'pleasant people,' you know;" and Meg carefully tied up her shoe as she spoke, so that no one saw her face.

"Why don't you say you'd have a splendid, wise, good husband, and some angelic little children? You know your castle wouldn't be perfect without," said blunt Jo, who had no tender fancies yet, and rather scorned romance, except in books.

“You'd have nothing but horses, inkstands, and novels in yours," answered Meg petulantly.

"Wouldn't I, though? I'd have a stable full of Arabian steeds, rooms piled with books, and I'd write out of a magic inkstand, so that my works should be as famous as Laurie's music. I want to do something splendid before I go into my castle,—something heroic or wonderful, that won't be forgotten after I'm dead. I don't know what, but I'm on the watch for it, and mean to astonish you all, some day. I think I shall write books, and get rich and famous: that would suit me, so that is my favorite dream."

"Mine is to stay at home safe with father and mother, and help take care of the family," said Beth contentedly.

"Don't you wish for anything else?" asked Laurie.

"Since I had my little piano, I am perfectly satisfied. I only wish we may all keep well and be together; nothing else."

"I have ever so many wishes; but the pet one is to be an artist, and go to Rome, and do fine pictures, and be the best artist in the whole world," was Amy's modest desire.

#dracula daily #little women #louisa may alcott #dracula

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moopsy-daisy · 8 months

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Make Your Own Cosmetics, Get What You Actually Want

Once you've been in zero waste, eco friendly, solarpunk/lunarpunk circles for a while, it's easy to forget the steps you took when you started. There are lots of DIY projects I've been doing for 10+ years now, and I keep doing them because they work (for me). Yet, when I sit back and think "am I doing enough?" I always gloss over the myriad things that have become part of my everyday life.

Making these things won't save the environment, but you'll get products that meet your needs on your terms, will save you money, and you won't have to worry about a company discontinuing your favorites. Plus, it seems like a lot less packaging to just buy a brick of beeswax and toss in some kitchen stuff you already had to make makeup.

Henna

I got really lucky, I always wanted red hair and henna is a natural dye that only comes in red. Well, more of a coppery tone. But, here's the other cool thing: the henna process is anti-fungal and controls dandruff. Half the time, I remember to color my hair because my scalp starts getting itchy 6+ weeks later and I start to get flakes. Coloring my hair takes care of my scalp and I don't need dandruff shampoo to keep it healthy. It's cost-effective, buying high quality henna for a year's worth of color (for my length and thicc hair) is about $60 for 18-months' of materials. I mix it when I need it, and keep the powder in the freezer. Pro-tip, if you or your partner don't like the grassy, hay-like smell of henna, add cardamom or ginger powder to the mix. It doesn't change the color but it'll knock down the scent.

I learned everything I needed to know about Henna for Hair here: http://hennaforhair.com and buy through Catherine's store because I know I'm getting real, quality henna powder.

Oh and a cloth wrap for your hair will let you keep the henna covered without wasting plastic wrap every time you redo your roots. I've been using the same 'turbie twist' wraps for years now. I made them from old t-shirts and they're stained as fuck. Who cares? This is basically their only job.

Carmine Lip Color

No, it isn't vegan. Yes, it's made of bugs. It's also a spectacular color, the insects aren't abused in the process of gathering or raising. They're actually parasites on nopal cactus, they have a simple niche and serve it well. I learned this lip stain recipe from Humblee & Me, and have found that the anti-bacterial doesn't seem to be necessary, ymmv. A 2.5 gram sample pack of carmine from TKB has lasted me almost a year and I wear this almost daily. I find that the glycerin really helps keep my lips from drying out too badly, so I wear my lip stain even when I'm not planning on being seen by other people. I spend about $20 on lip color for a year and that's including the bottles I use to store it (tiny eyedroppers work best imo) and the glycerin. Not quite zero waste but darn close.

Note: I'm still trying to find a simple recipe for black goth lipstick that I like. So far, my attempts have had a nasty texture and aren't worth the trouble.

Eyebrow Fill

My favorite brand of eyebrow liner discontinued the best color I ever found, so I decided to make my own. Beeswax, cocoa powder, activated charcoal, and almond oil made a little pot of eyebrow fill that suits my needs beautifully. Go super light on the charcoal until you know you've got the color you want. My brows are pretty dark but not fully black, so I do a dark chocolate sort of shade. I think I made my last batch about 11 months ago and it's still half full. I use it daily, apply with an angled brush, and it's never given me breakouts or anything. I don't even wash it off, because I am lazy.

Body Powder/Dry shampoo

Growing up in California, I didn't need this stuff. Living in Oregon? Summer would be awful without body powder. It's also a nice way to have a fragrance on. Pour your favorite perfume (I love Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab oils) onto a cotton ball, put that ball in a jar with a bunch of corn starch. Shake. Leave it for a month. You now have scented body powder. It's a decent dry shampoo, too, I just brush it into my dark hair and it disappears.

Tooth Powder

There is NOTHING wrong with using conventional toothpaste if it meets your needs. I have particular reasons for using tooth powder. These include hating the taste of most toothpaste and needing to avoid fluoride because of my particular thyroid condition. (Fluoride isn't bad for everyone! It isn't ideal for everyone. Figure out what you need!) I make my own tooth powder, it works well enough for me and I don't hate brushing my teeth like I used to. 1 part baking soda, 1 part bentonite clay, some ground cloves. Mix it up, keep in a glass jar (metal will bond with the clay, bad things happen, this is why we use glass or plastic for storage). $20 of materials = LOADS of tooth powder.

Cutting Hair

It's way easier than you think. I cut my own hair and I do a graduated bob which is a little more complex than most at-home cuts. I taught myself. I use decent shears (don't use scissors) and a Wahl hair trimmer set. Learn this skill on yourself, and when people find out you can do hair, they'll come to you for their own needs. Great way to provide mutual aid (one of my parents is trans and getting haircuts in a salon would be extremely stressful for her, so I cut her hair and save her money and suffering). You could also do skill trades! I trade haircuts for massages from a massage therapist friend, for example.

Protip: Dust yourself with body powder before cutting hair, it makes the little shards of cut hair way less prone to sticking to you. You'll still want a shower but it'll just be less icky.

#diy #lunarpunk #solarpunk #carmine #henna #makeup

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musashi · 7 months

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feel free to ignore if unwarranted or unhelpful seriously : i deeply relate to going from having extremely close friends you tell everything to to have basically no one you can open up to despite trying to make connections. i have a therapist who has never once advised me to make friends and has instead helped me untangle my feelings in a way that makes the load a little less to bear. i am poor poor so free clinic as well. you are not me but this has made daily life bearable

i really wish people who are sad sometimes online had any agency in their own life to say "i do not think i need therapy" and be taken seriously, but i feel like every time i say it and say it firmly here, a bunch of anons like this (and sometimes trusted friends as well) just start shaking their heads and clicking their teeth and looking away from me like oh poor thing... they're so far gone they can't even accept they need help

like maybe i'm not being clear so i'll say it again: i do not need therapy. early 20s wendy with severe personality disorders that were wreaking fucking havoc on their underdeveloped frontal lobe needed therapy. 15 year old PTSD-laden cannot log onto a single social media site without being sent harassment and shock photos wendy needed therapy. violently suicidal 10 shots of vodka a night wendy needed therapy. current wendy does not need therapy.

this does not mean that a person needs to reach a certain threshold of pain or stress to need a therapist. that is not what i am trying to say. but the ideal endgoal for a therapist is for them to some day never see their clients again. the point of a therapist is to help you gain control of your own life, and develop the proper neural pathways and coping mechanisms to do so. i do not need help with this: i have perfected it like any other art. i am amazing at doing that on my own, so much so that i have legitimately had actual licensed professionals in shock that those are skills i developed just fucking around in my early 20s trying not to die.

according to my ex, a psychology major, i perfected CBT without any coaching or instruction. i literally did it intuitively. she said to me, you realize people pay thousands of dollars to be coached on that?

when i am in crisis, it is very easy (practice) for me to find my emotional center, calm down, and get to work problem solving. whether that problem be something tangible (something went wrong at work, home, etc) or more abstract (i think my loved one hates me because i have BPD) i can easily get into 'lets fix it!' mode and follow through. people who follow me on tumblr do not see 99.9% of the issues i am having because they crop up, i feel the feelings, and then i send them on their way.

but sometimes you cannot do that on your own. human beings were literally, scientifically, logistically NOT MEANT TO SURVIVE IN ISOLATION. it is NOT POSSIBLE for a person to live a healthy, happy life without social bonds. i don't understand why i have to explain this to people. sometimes i feel like i am from mars. we are meant to be with each other! we are meant to support one another and share our woes! that is the CRUX of humanity!

so, for 99.9% of my problems, of my agonies, i not only succeed but i excel at turning them into meaningless blips on the radar of my life. there is a remaining .1%, though, where the solution is simply that i want to go to a friend, cry for a little bit, receive a hug and/or some validation, and then move on with my life like it never happened.

THAT? THAT APPARENTLY WARRANTS ME NEEDING THERAPY? THAT LITTLE, TINY, MEANINGLESS .1% THAT SOMETIMES FUCKS ME?

i'm just so sick of this. i am not a person who would have ANYTHING to talk about at therapy. stressors in my life are minimal. hobbies, creative projects, work, home life, all of these things have been lovely and heart-dappled and pink since i was reborn seven years ago. and every miserable lapse i do have is short-lived and met with courage and the knowledge that i can survive it, that i can survive anything.

but occasionally, i am sad that i do not have friends who i can realtalk with. friends who will bring their woes to me. friends who i can in turn bring my own woes to. occasionally, i am sad because i WATCHED the decline of deep social bonding. i watched terms like emotional labour and traumadumping go mainstream. i watched my friend circle become less and less comfortable with heavy topics. mere YEARS ago i could sit in a discord call with friends and talk extensively about all the highs and lows of my life and listen to them do the same. if i try that tomorrow, i will get the worst awkward silences i have ever heard in my life. heavy, palpable, heart-shattering awkward silences that scream oh, you weren't supposed to say that. you're only liked when you're perfectly happy, we don't want to hear about when you're sad.

this happened in my lifetime. i am grieving. and if i go to a therapist, all i am going to do is say, every week, "i can't think of anything much to discuss." and then maybe every 6th or 7th week i'll say "the continuing insistence that humans are not meant to help and love one another is making me feel emotionally isolated and terrified that i will never meet someone who wants that from me again."

and my therapist will say "yeah, that makes sense. i've seen a good deal of that too, it's really concerning."

and then we will nod. and i will leave.

it's cool that the 'go to therapy' people didn't make you want to scream and cry and yell "YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT" but you're right, you are not me. my life was already bearable, sometimes i just get sad about ONE THING. the one thing is that i don't have friends i can be 100% myself around, no matter how i try. no matter what i do.

we are not the same. you went to your friends, said, "hey, i just feel like you only like me when i'm palatable. i really wish i could rely on you from time to time for a listening ear. is there a reason i can't?"

your friends said "that's emotional labour and traumadumping. you need to tell that to a therapist, not me."

you said, "oh. okay."

i went to my friends, said, "hey, i just feel like you only like me when i'm palatable. i really wish i could rely on you from time to time for a listening ear. is there a reason i can't?"

my friends said "that's emotional labour and traumadumping. you need to tell that to a therapist, not me."

and i said "you are a really shitty fucking friend."

happy that's working out for you, dude. you didn't need to send this ask, and i'd prefer you never send another one again.

#wendy answers #Anonymous #wendy rants #i am so sick of this fucking shit #you are a part of the problem btw.

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mbti-notes · 5 days

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Anon wrote: What can I do in these situations? I realized I feel very fearful, even phobic about the internet now, by seeing how is talked about the way big companies manage private data, the thing of devices being vulnerable to any cyber attack and the way AI is being used to harass people and scam.

I feel… very terrified by all of this, I don't feel at ease even at my own home by living with smart devices. Is there a way I can make this more tolerable? I know we all need technology in our lifes now, but I don't want to feel spied on and vulnerable by it. It feels… very apocalyptic to me, and has made me fall in a pit of existential despair.

Then I started to think about my forgotten accounts, which made me VERY panicked. What if something happened to them and I didn't know? What if they're used for terrible things?

This worry has become so magnified in my mind, that I fear crumbling down when facing daily life things, and then even become bed ridden by the immense anxiety. I was bed ridden through many years by anxiety before so, this has become a huge concern.

I'm INFJ btw. Thank you very much!

-----------------------

Your anxiety sounds serious enough that I would strongly recommend getting professional help for it.

Phobias are considered irrational because they are based on faulty reasoning, distorted beliefs, or circular overthinking. For example:

1) Phobics exaggerate negative possibilities because they treat mere "probability" as near "certainty". This is often a problem of being bad at math or logic.

For example, the odds of dying by drowning are about 1 in 1000. What does that really mean, though? Does it mean that if you go swimming 999 times, you'll certainly die by the 1000th? No. What if you rarely go swimming? What if you are an Olympic-level swimmer? What if you only swim in recreational pools with other people and never alone in the sea? There are so many contextual factors that could affect the odds of drowning that trying to calculate the odds is basically meaningless when it comes to making life decisions.

2) Phobics envision mainly negative possibilities and overlook positive ones. This is a problem of distorted perception that then leads to distorted beliefs.

Let's say you read a statistic that car accidents are one of the leading causes of death. Because of this, you developed a fear of driving and thus always have to rely on others to transport you everywhere. Unfortunately, you don't live in a very walkable city, so this dependence on others causes you to lose a lot. You lose time because you often have to take indirect or slower routes. You lose energy because you always have to plan your outings very carefully. You lose opportunities because you can't always get to every place you need to go on time. You may even lose relationships because of being too dependent on people to come to your rescue when stranded.

If you were to objectively compare what you lose by not driving against what you could gain by being able to drive yourself, being able to drive is the better option. Furthermore, the fact of the matter is that you still need to be in a car on the road, but not driving yourself means that you have far less control over the outcome. Generally speaking, feeling less in control only exacerbates fear.

From these examples, it becomes more obvious why the best way to overcome phobia is to confront it and learn to master it, rather than give in to it. Just as not driving doesn't keep you out of vehicles and off the road, in 2024, there's no way to live life properly without accessing the internet. If you must do something you fear doing, the answer isn't to look for ways to avoid doing it but to learn how to do it to the best of your ability.

E.g. You can learn effective ways to protect your privacy. You can learn how to avoid getting scammed. You can learn how to use social media constructively. You can improve your judgment and be less naive or gullible.

You believe your fear is an indication of a dangerous world out there but, actually, your fear is an indication of your own low self-confidence. People lack self-confidence when they lack the knowledge and skill necessary to meet challenges and solve problems. The world is constantly changing and life will keep throwing challenges at you. The best way to cope is by being a good learner and adapting to change with new knowledge and skills.

Since phobias are irrational, an important aspect of overcoming them is becoming a more rational person, which means it's necessary for you to improve your critical thinking skills. For example, which option is more rational: 1) Avoiding the internet and living in a state of ignorance and anxiety, which basically means your life comes to a standstill? or 2) Learning how to use the internet more wisely, which means you can live your life confidently and fully?

#infj #phobia #fear #anxiety #self confidence #adaptability #mental health #internet #social media #technology #critical thinking #ask

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lanabotomy · 15 days

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The Female Rage Consumes Me

“Female rage,” sounded like an oxymoron for the majority of my life. The characterization of the words alone create this kind of juxtaposition that seems unrealistic. Female; womanly, kind, soft, gentle, all these words just to portray this image of innocence and purity. Rage; ugly, consuming, violent, the word itself feels inherently masculine. And yet, I watch and listen as the rage fully envelope and consume me.

I don’t know when the idea of Female Rage enraptured my brain, but I could say it started when I read a silly little book by Margaret Atwood called The Robber Bride.

“Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it's all a male fantasy: that you're strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren't catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you're unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else. You are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur.”

The idea that I can never fully be myself without the ever lurking man watching me, sexualizing me, consuming me like a piece of media only to be spat out once I fulfilled his satisfaction, it disgusts me. To worsen the matter, I know deep in my soul, that if I wasn’t desired, I wouldn’t know who to be. I don’t even know which parts of me are real or which parts of me have been created in pursuit of this ideal “male fantasy” I have created in my head subconsciously, and that enrages me even further.

Is the rage I feel even valid? Maybe my rage is actually just a deep rooted fear, a fear of what has or what could happen to me. I remember those lurking eyes on me since the age of 9, taking out the trash around 9PM in my galaxy leggings, those men yelling at me, asking me where I am from and where I live, what plans I had. All I could do was run in fear. I remember being 6, my mother’s boyfriend holding my hand and telling me that he’d marry my mother one day, what felt like a threat, those peering eyes undressing me, that hand burning a hole through me, as if the ghost of his perverted touch was still there. Or maybe it was those days in school when I would get groped, almost daily by the boys, the teachers said I was more developed and to expect those things, to wear less revealing clothes. I wore star wars shirts, lord of the rings shirts, and DC clothes. What was so sexually appealing about that? The worst memory of all…. I was forced out of my dorm room while 5 drunk guys stayed with us, none of them my guests. I remember just wanting to sleep. I remember one of those guys being weird, and avoiding him all night. I was so tired that night, and yet I didn’t want to sleep. He snuck into my bed, put his hand over my mouth, and did what he needed to do to satisfy himself. The unwanted touching, the unwanted stares, the unwanted attention. I feel like a walking piece of meat in the land of hungry wolves; A temptation to be consumed.

The rage that consumes me comes from a place of fear, and a place of knowing that I cannot be helped. One in three women experience sexual assault within their life, one in five experience rape, and yet only one in one thousand rapists face persecution, and that is only from reported cases. More than 2 out of 3 cases go unreported. Those are just the basic statistics. Imagine them in other situations; homeless women, women in 3rd world countries, women of color, women in the military, queer women, women in prisions, women in situations where they are helpless. I cant even begin to fathom the stories that would pile up beside me if I was able to speak to every woman, every feminine person, everyone who has a story.

To be so helpless in a world that doesn’t support me, it’s simply sickening. And I live the “Land of the Free, Land of endless Opportunities.” I feel the rage of my sisters, or the women around the world who know and understand me.

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words-after-midnight · 18 days

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I enjoyed your question so much it made me curious so I'm throwing it back to you: what in your WIP would start internet debates if published?

Haha. Can you tell that question was inspired by how I think about this all the time regarding my own WIPs? 😅 Well, two of them in particular, namely Life in Black and White and The Dotted Line.

For Life in Black and White:

The ending and core message will almost certainly be very controversial if the book gets any kind of traction, even just based on the response I've seen to previous books that addressed similar themes and topics. I've tried my best for years to make it come across as intended, but of course, there's only so much I can do. There will be people who will "get it," and people who wildly misinterpret it or approach it with too little nuance (ironic, given that "approaching fundamentally nuanced things without nuance can be dangerous, harmful, and have far-reaching complications" is, like, the core "point" of the story, but I won't get into specifics beyond that because of spoilers).

This story explicitly portrays actual codependency, not the romanticized (and incorrect) version fandom loves to tack onto every mutually obsessive ship. The central dynamic is an ill-defined, intense, and abusive relationship between one person who adopts a permanent caretaker role with regard to the other person, who frequently engages in reckless and unsafe behavior to an extent that is both self-destructive and destructive more generally. The caretaker character has good intentions (you know what they say about those!), but basically loses his entire identity and sense of self in his misguided attempts to care for (read: control) the other character, who does whatever the fuck he wants and is about as "tameable" as a wild dragon. This dynamic is fundamentally cyclical and is only broken when they are separate. If you know anything about libaw, you've probably figured out who I'm talking about. I can only imagine the sheer discourse about their Problematic and Toxic relationship if ever this sees the light of day. I call them trainwreck for a reason!

By the way, that character who allegedly needs to be cared for and protected because, left to his own devices, he just can't help being a living tornado? Yeah, that guy? Main antagonist of the story. Callous, vile, wickedly manipulative, would 100% be either sexualized to hell and back or called "bad queer representation" (among other things) on Tumblr. He is not any of the endearing, hilarious, and/or harmless-looking masks he wears in daily life. He's said and done some absolutely heinous shit. Unfortunately for everyone, the aforementioned caretaker character is WILDLY obsessed with him and thinks he's in love with him. None of these intense romantic feelings are remotely returned, which I expect some readers to understand, while I feel like others will think that there is some particular "special affection" there that Jeff holds for Gabriel and that he just can't express in a "typical" way (I might as well name them, you all know who I'm talking about here), because that's usually how these types of dynamics are written (ie. the "unfeeling" character having one or two close people in their lives they have some genuine affection for).

The exact nature of Jeff's affective disposition will be argued about to shit and probably called "bad representation of neurodivergent people" because he's not a good person - regardless of anything else about him - and displays some aggressive/violent/otherwise unpalatable behavior. He will almost certainly be assumed to be neurodivergent in some way, because it's extremely obvious, but this is why I've never specifically defined or labelled it. I know what he would be labelled as (eg. in a correctional or psychiatric setting), and that's partially what I based my character research on, but I also think labels are just that. They're not an immutable, core aspect of someone, and they're often disputed and debatable. Nuance, right?

I've alluded to this before in previous ask responses, but Jeff experiences a traumatic incident at one point in the story. You see part of his response (which is atypical and not prime-time drama approved), but it's filtered through Gabriel, who is having an overblown vicarious trauma response to this event and handles it extremely poorly, which includes basically making it all about him, because this ridiculous fucking man cannot separate his identity from Jeff to save his damn life (jfc I'm getting heated, lmao). For some people, this will all be completely fine because Jeff is a terrible person, right? Pretty classic Asshole Victim trope going on here. Again, absolutely none of this will pass the social media vibe check.

Speaking of atypical trauma responses: there are several in this story, and I expect to get flack for "unrealistic" or "irresponsible" portrayals of trauma. As in, I have literally seen takes online calling a trauma response I've written an "irresponsible portrayal" in other media, when in fact said response is quite common, just not commonly portrayed. The thing is: if there's one thing I've done in fifteen years of working on this story, it's my fucking research. In some cases I'm also drawing from my own experiences. Most of my characters are trauma survivors to some degree, but I tailor their responses to their characterization. For example: Gabriel lost his mother shortly prior to the beginning of the story, but almost never talks about her or her death, which some may interpret as him being "unaffected" by the loss. Actually, though, Gabriel's grieving process with his mother is functionally identical to mine when my dad passed away at a similar age.

Last but not least (though I'm sure I'm forgetting things): several characters, including Gabriel, have diagnosed mental illnesses, and I don't beat around the bush when it comes to describing the "ugly" symptoms.

For The Dotted Line:

My joking answer is "the whole thing." Like, not literally, but overall it's worse than Life in Black and White when it comes to heavy and controversial.

We've got a realistic American state prison setting in the mid- to late aughts.

We've got a first person narrator with low emotional tone - think A Clockwork Orange. His narrative is like this piece (which is also narrated by him).

We've got a bona fide villain protagonist who is also an incredibly complex character. I try to make you feel conflicted about him on multiple occasions, which I'm sure will go over very well in the world of online discourse.

Not only do we have atypical trauma responses and just mountains of horrific shit that becomes almost mundane given that, again, it's a prison, we get to have all of this filtered by the internal monologue of a guy who lives by his own warped sense of morality, is in warzone mode 24/7, and believes that we live in a world of predators and prey and that "if you play with sharks you can't get all upset about being bitten." Lovely, huh? Can't wait to see how the world wide web dissects this man's behavior and life experiences.

WOW THIS GOT SO LONG AND I'M SORRY, but I'm also not sorry, because this is stuff I think about a lot and it was kind of cathartic to write it out lol.

#libaw #tdl #my characters are excellent specimens of humanity /s #writeblr #ask #sts

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yanderes-galore · 2 years

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Hi! Can I request a scenario for TMNT 2012’s Rahzar with a darling who is a close friend of the turtles? I hope you have a good day/night!

Thank you! I hope your day/night is fantastic as well!

Insider's Knowledge

Yandere! Rahzar Scenario

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Stalking, Manipulation, Threats, Kidnapping, Obsession, OOC Rahzar (?)

To Rahzar, you were a high value target. One he had been hunting down for awhile now. He was fully capable of capturing you but for now he was drawing this out.

Due to the fact you were so close with the turtles Rahzar knew he could use you for information, or at the very least a bargaining chip. It would certainly make his master proud. Although... he watched you longer just to make sure you actually had information.

Atleast that's what the mutated beast kept telling himself and others. It would be a pain to take in the wrong person, right? Maybe he had other reasons of putting off your interrogation....

Such as, personal interest. Luckily he was silent enough you never spotted him. Yet he followed your scent whenever he picked up on it.

He'd perch himself on rooftops, watching you carefully. He picked up every little word and thing you did thanks to his enhanced senses. Something about watching you while you were so blissfully unaware made him grin.

He'd never let the others know. He disguised this little hobby of his as spy work. When in reality he was just so absorbed in your daily life.

It was a strange obsession that you'd think got in the way of his work. However, instead, it actually lined up pretty well. At some point he'd have to take you in for information.

Which is also a nice excuse to take you away from those turtles.

Once the time came he made sure he was gentle when capturing you. You had basic self defense skills but it was nothing compared to him. He had also been studying you for the past few weeks, you had no chance.

By the time you came to you're tied up in an abandoned warehouse with nowhere to go. In front of you stands a tall skeletal mutant, eyes never leaving your figure. For now, he was alone.

But he could always call in back up.

"Start talking." He growls, making his way towards you. "What do you know about the turtles?"

You look at him with fearful eyes but say nothing. Rahzar applauds your loyalty, yet he feels it's misplaced. Deep down he's quite envious you trust those turtles so much.

It's not like you met before this anyway, though.

"What do you mean!? I know nothing!"

"Do you really think you can lie your way out of this?

Rahzar leans closer, growling at you. He smelt and looked like death. You wished the turtles would come and help soon....

"I've been keeping my eye on you for a long time now. I know you have the information I seek. I need anything you know."

"Will I be let go if I tell you?"

Rahzar only stares at you, orange eyes looking you over. Would he let you go after all the stalking? Would he just let you out of here without a second thought?

"...No."

"What?"

"I don't need you for just that information. I have other uses for you."

By now you couldn't tell if you felt fear, anger, or sadness. Anguish was a better word for it. You knew Rahzar was strong through the turtles, if you angered him there was no telling you'd live.

"I'm keeping you here. Once you turn against those turtles you'll be put to good use. Shredder will be quite pleased to have a spy."

"Shredder!?"

Rahzar watches you panic in your restraints. Tears threaten to spill from your eyes at the thought of meeting his master. Poor thing... scared like a mouse in front of a cat.

"Things will go smoothly if you just listen to me. I'll do my best not to hurt you."

Claws trace down you in a strangely affectionate way. It was enough to catch you off guard. Such a terrifying beast being gentle with a hostage?

He has ulterior motives... he has to!

"Get to talking, we don't have all day."

Rahzar grins again, digging his claws in slightly. Not enough to make you bleed, but enough to be uncomfortable. He seemed deep in thought.

"Although, I don't mind keeping you here with me for awhile if you really want to fight me."

He'd never admit it to anyone, but perhaps he really has taken a liking to you.

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